#how about pistachio ice cream with raisins

[thephoenixcave]

Terra and Edgar eating ice cream at the park

Back in November 2020 I was pandemic-stressed and election-stressed. During lockdown I filled a sketchbook with edgar x terra and also tried to teach myself Japanese. These comics come from that period. I loved returning to my comfort ship, and thinking up stories for them and drawing them happy and together. (Even though Edgar probably returned home a sticky mess 🍦

The final panel, it is the onomatopoeia in Japanese that translates to “plop”. As in, “plop, now there’s ice cream on your lap!” Being in love sometimes means putting up with these things

I always wanted to redraw the second half of the story. You can see it’s done with pen and paper and looks less polished than my usual stuff. But who knows if I’ll ever get around to it.

Anyway tonight I am once again election-stressed and am looking for cute, for sweet, for safe. And that is ffvi and edotina for me 🥰

[sarnai4]

(Because of you, @mer-acle 😁)

Ice cream for Mount Olympus.

Athena is a classy lady. She gets pistachio other nuts like white chocolate macadamia (Thanks @dantsem!), and olive oil because we know that's her tree. She knows how to get the perfect number of scoops to be perfectly satisfied.

Ares is a frozen yogurt immortal because he wants to go against what the others are doing. He refuses to join in. He'll try every flavor and load it with toppings, challenging Athena to see who can pile on more things until someone has a topping spill out.

Artemis wants the flavors that show her toughness. She's getting black licorice, ghost pepper, wasabi, etc. Apollo wants her to stop after the tears start, but she will power through.

Apollo is health-conscious. He's getting low-fat flavors, oatmilk or almond milk ice cream, or he's just getting Italian ice. Sorbet is also an option, but he'll argue you down about sherbet being a healthy alternative.

Hermes is ordering whatever the most uncommon flavors are. He will get garlic and Cheetos Flamin Hot (yes, these are real ice cream flavors) just to see his family cringe. He doesn't even really want them. Athena questions the logic of this.

Hephaestus likes vanilla. The others make fun of him for being boring, but he enjoys how this can be a good foundation for other desserts, sundaes, root beer floats, etc.

Dionysus is eating rum raisin, tequila, and margarita Italian ice. There was no other option. He saw booze and got heart eyes.

Aphrodite is eating chocolate and cheesecake flavors because they're rich and remind her of the richness of a passionate moment. She also likes cherry Italian ice because it makes her lips red.

Zeus is having banana cream pie, dark chocolate, and watermelon sorbet because these foods are aphrodisiacs. Even if they don't really have this effect on the brain, he's willing to try and this isn't good for anyone.

Hera eats swirls. They absolutely must be even and no other flavors can be mixed because so help her, she will see a good marriage of something even if it's only chocolate and vanilla.

Poseidon likes salted caramel. He puts extra salt on there to make him think of the ocean and adds some of those Swedish Fish on top. Zeus steals his fish most of the time.

Demeter likes black cherry, blueberry, lemon sorbet, and every other fruit flavor. She's the goddess of harvest after all. She absolutely might brag whenever she tries one that she really likes because she feels like she's a big reason for the fruits being so good.

Hades likes butter pecan and spumoni. They're relaxing but still flavorful. He can calmly enjoy a bowl of them either mixed or separate. He doesn't get involved in his brothers' ice cream battle. He just watches as Ares edges them on.

Hestia likes cake batter, birthday cake, and all the other flavors that are extremely sweet. She's the only one who can stomach things that sweet and her family thinks it's just because she's equally sweet.

[maxwhathappened]

Sundae Request Menu

This is my ice cream request menu! Make your own sundae in my inbox as a request. I won’t generally take requests outside of this format, but you’re welcome to try.

When you place your order please:

Specify which driver the order is for

Limit yourself to 1 Dish, 1 Drink, 3 flavors and 4 toppings, though you are free to do less than those.

Make sure to clearly specify what is a flavor and what is a topping as some names are the same.

I got this idea from @tpwk-formula1 , be sure to check out their blog as well.

Thank you for your order!

Dish

Cup - smut

Regular Cone - fluff

Waffle Cone - angst

Flavors

Apple Pie - “I want forever with you.”

Banana - “I’ve wanted you for so long.”

Bittersweet Chocolate - “You’re the only one I want.”

Black Cherry - “You’re all I’ve ever wanted.”

Bubblegum - “Do you still want me?”

Butter Pecan - “I can’t imagine my life without you.”

Butterscotch - “I never stopped loving you.”

Cake Batter - “Please let me love you.”

Cheesecake - “Don’t you get it? I love you!”

Cherry Almond - “Do you trust me?”

Cherry Chocolate - “I was worried about you.”

Cherry Vanilla - “Don’t worry. I’ll take care of it for you.”

Chocolate - “Can you stay?”

Chocolate Almond - “Please don’t go.”

Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough - “Please. I can’t lose you.”

Chocolate Fudge - “I won’t let you go.”

Chocolate Soft Serve - “I’m not going to leave you.”

Chocolate Vanilla Swirl - “I love seeing you smile.”

Coconut - “You look amazing.”

Coffee - “You clean up nice.”

Cookies and Cream - “You’re so beautiful.”

Cotton Candy - “Oh no, baby. Please don’t cry.”

Dulce de Leche - “No, don’t cry. I hate it when you cry.”

Espresso - “Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

French Vanilla - “What can I do to earn your forgiveness?”

German Chocolate - “Is there anything I can do to make this better?”

Lemon Sherbert - “I’m sorry! How many times can I say it?”

Lemon Sorbet - “Get back in bed right this instant!”

Lime Sherbert - “You’re burning up. Just let me take care of you.”

Lime Sorbet - “I’ll take care of you, baby.”

Mango Sherbert - “I can’t believe you let him touch you.”

Maple Walnut - “I don’t want anyone else to touch you.”

Mint Chip - “You belong to me.”

Mocha - “Say it.”

Neapolitan - “I’m gonna mark you up for everyone to see.”

Orange Sherbert - “You like when I leave marks on you, don’t you?”

Peach - “You’re such a good girl.”

Peanut Butter Cup - “So good, so sweet, so perfect.”

Peppermint - “Be a good girl for daddy.”

Pineapple Sorbet - “You can be so good when you want to. Why aren’t you good all the time?”

Pistachio - “Don’t get greedy now. Be patient.”

Pistachio Almond - “A little needy?”

Praline - “Do what you’re told and you’ll get what you want.”

Rainbow Sherbert - “Just one more, baby. I just want one more.”

Raspberry Sorbet - “You can do one more for me, can’t you?”

Raspberry Swirl - “You’re such a brat.”

Rum Raisin - “Getting a little tired? Too bad.”

Rocky Road - “You’re such a little slut.”

Salted Caramel - “Fucked you dumb, didn’t I?”

Spumoni - “You are in so much trouble.”

Strawberry - “You’re gonna be sorry later.”

Strawberry Soft Serve - “You want me to fuck a baby into you?”

Toffee -“I’m gonna get you pregnant.”

Vanilla - “Fuck, you’re so tight.”

Vanilla Bean - “It’s too big.”

Vanilla Soft Serve - “You’re dripping, sweetheart.”

White Chocolate - “Oh fuck, do that again.”

Toppings

almonds - dom!driver

bananas - sub! driver

blueberries - switch! driver

brownies - soft dom! driver

Butterfingers - brat!reader

butterscotch syrup - sir! kink

Captain Crunch - daddy! kink

caramel - rough sex

cherries - slow/romantic sex

chocolate chips - jealousy

chocolate sprinkles - public sex

chocolate syrup - phone sex

coconut flakes - mirror sex

gummy bears - shower sex

hazelnuts - doggy

honey - mating press

jelly beans - riding

kit kats - overstimulation

Lucky Charms - edging

macadamia nuts - spitting

marshmallows - squirting

mint syrup - hair pulling

M&M’s - biting

nutella - choking

oreos - marking

peanuts - fisting

peanut butter cups - spanking

peanut butter syrup - cockwarming

peppermint patties - dirty talk

pralines - praise kink

pretzels - degradation kink

pistachios - somnophilia

raspberries - breeding kink

Rice Krispies - size kink

Snickers - ass play

sprinkles - toys

strawberries - bondage

strawberry syrup - mutual masturbation

walnuts - body worship

whipped cream - nipple play

white chocolate chips - dacryphilia

white chocolate syrup - aftercare

Drink

chocolate malt - established relationship

chocolate milkshake - friends to lovers

coke float - enemies to lovers

orange soda float - secret relationship

oreo milkshake - fake relationship

peanut butter milkshake - roommates

rootbeer float - exes

strawberry malt - coworkers

strawberry milkshake - best friend’s brother

vanilla milkshake - brother’s best friend

vanilla malt - strangers to lovers/meet cute

[navy-heart]

Kwko favourite ice-cream flavour

Oooh very good question actually!

Maki: mango

Karin: (salted) caramel

Kairi: butter pecan & matcha

Suzuka: blueberry

Akari: chocolate

Reishi: strawberry (← he is basic)

Other cast members in no particular order under the cut. Hoc exclusive please do not look if you don't want MASSIVE spoilers (which is just npc names and their ice cream favs so like. Who am I to stop you). Ok :]

Hozuki: rocky road

Touka: bubble gum

Junna: coffee

Kotori: pistachio

Ray: almond

Yuuka: mint without chocolate chip. Bite her

Yoriko: banana

Makoto: espresso

Hibiki: green apple

Tsukihime: lemon

Ryuu: rum raisin

Reiji: irish cream

Shuli: cookie dough

Kanna: cranberry

Kirito: melon

Zoe: tropical (especially pineapple, watermelon and kiwi). She is aware of the irony

Kazumi: black cherry & grape

Koteru: oreo. Your honor he is an itty bitty baby

Satomi: peach

Meron: blackberry & raspberry

Takeru doesn't have a favourite ice cream flavor because he is allergic to fun.

This isn't all of the npcs but I think it's everyone I've told you about & who have a relatively major role.

To everyone who against their better judgement clicked on the spoiler and is now shocked and disgusted by how many of These Guys there are. My condolences. I wish it wasn't that way either

[arachnxphobe]

random miguel hcs

will not admit it but he has cried to multiple animated kids movies

definitely the classics like toy story 3, the iron giant, and inside out

but he also BAWLED at the end of finding nemo because he was thinking about gabriella

he thinks that toothless from how to train your dragon is cute

no i will not elaborate on that

secretly celebrates st patrick’s day

likes to wear something green under his suit or have one piece of decor hidden in the depths of his office

has really low spice tolerance BUT really likes it and also he has a reputation to keep up as the big and tough guy so he WILL try and hide how much water he is chugging

he likes the dad ice cream flavours like pistachio and rum raisin

but hates dad hobbies like golfing or collecting stuff like antique coins or dioramas

he just doesn’t have the patience for it

can cook and bake!!!! actually scratch that he can do all of the chores and is basically a househusband but is simply unwilling to do it

peter b may or may not have gotten him a kiss the cook apron that may or may not be the only apron he owns…

he could 100% have gourmet meals every day but he doesn’t have anyone to impress but himself so most days he just lives off of the sealed, pre-cooked chicken breasts from the convenience store and reheated rice that he makes in a big batch once a week

because yes chicken can be store bought but microwaved rice tastes too much like chemicals, especially for his heightened taste buds

is a shower guy

he thinks that baths are too inefficient and most tubs can’t fit him

but if you somehow manage to find one that’s big enough…oh boy he’ll act like you are waterboarding him but honestly he’s having the time of his life

competitive as hell, even when he acts like he could not care less

like he does not understand the concept of letting somebody else win, why is he handicapping himself and letting them think they’re better than they actually are?

he doesn’t mean it in a way to establish dominance or superiority

he just thinks that it’s weird to let someone win because wouldn’t lying to them be worse? now they can’t even improve

designed his own suit and probably gets a little bit self conscious when someone comments on it because he really isn’t an aesthetics guy but he worked really hard and is proud of his suit 🥺

was perhaps a little bit salty about the dark garfield comment but you didn’t hear that from me

please never trust him with naming or decorating though because if left on his own, it’s either going to be the most disgusting combination of items ever known to man or quite literally the bare minimum

don’t even think about a bed frame, there’s a chance that he doesn’t even have a mattress

he’s good with personal hygiene though

a slight germaphobe in the sense that he wants everything to be sterile (a habit he picked up from always being in the lab) but is more than okay with getting his hands dirty, just as long as he can thoroughly sanitize them afterwards

a terrible movie watcher

he either does not understand the movie whatsoever and keeps on asking questions that they just answered a minute ago

or he’s ripping them apart for their weird pseudoscience

honestly his ranting ends up being more entertaining than the movie at times

be prepared for a full lecture if you don’t stop him at some point though

i’ve heard a lot of people throw out spanish songs that they think he would listen to but might i suggest some non-spanish songs

he gives me doja cat vibes, don’t ask me, i just feel it

personally, i don’t think he would actively listen to kpop or be into the fan culture but he probably enjoys some songs without even realizing they’re kpop

i’m thinking newjeans and maybe epik high??

ABBA

mitski and hozier (where are my depressed wlw at) because you know that when he’s in his brooding self hating mood that he needs suitable bgm

HATES cruises

something about being on water does not vibe with his spider-catness

neither does the overall cruise ship experience

hot tubs and buffets just don’t really do it for him

there’s not much space for privacy except for your own room but even then the walls are fairly thin

so it’d be nearly impossible for him to get any sort of peace

me and the rest of the internet all seem to have agreed that he has insomnia and i feel like a cruise ship would not help whatsoever

would complain about how the mexican food is just what americans think mexican food is like

is too much of a workaholic to take an extended break, and it’s too difficult to jump back into work should there be an emergency

[thebindingofpillo]

Hi! The previous anon who asked about your bio here. Kind of random but I'm curious what the fav ice cream flavors of the cast are. And since I'm bored, I'm gonna give my guesses Isaac: Chocolate

Magdalene: pistachio

Cain: Vanilla Judas: hot fudge Eve: Cookies and cream Samson: strawberry Azazel: rainbow sherbet (not ice cream but seemed fitting idk why Lazarus: black walnut Eden: Prob doesn't eat but if i had to guess butter pecan Lilith: doesn't like ice cream but gets chocolate chip cookie dough for Fwendy Apollyon: believe they were confirmed to not eat in an ask years ago but if they could uhhhhh strawberry Bethany: Mint chocolate chip Jacob: peanut butter Esau: ghost ice cream Neapolitan

all of these were just done off of vibes and little to no thought went in to them

Hiiiiii I love all of these, tbf I haven’t really thought about their favourite ice cream flavours either but it’s fun! Here’s my thoughts. Disclaimer: I don’t really know a lot of American ice cream flavours lol

Isaac: he’d probably like chocolate ngl. A bit basic but alright. Nothing that stands out too much. I feel like he would also like vanilla. Either that or something stupid like bubblegum. He’s too done to care, he’ll get whatever he pleases lol.

Magdalene: something rich like salted caramel, or a very fancy vanilla. Rocky road. Cookie dough. Or all of the above, together. She has a huge sweet tooth and likes mixing and matching.

Cain: He likes it simple, so I guess vanilla could go. Or rum raisin because he’s an old man.

Judas: doesn’t really like sweets in general, so he doesn’t really have a favourite ice cream. If he had to choose he’d probably go with coffee or something not overtly sweet, like pistachio or dark chocolate. Always gets the smallest cone/cup available.

Eve: isn’t really one for sweets in general unless she’s feeling really down, in which case she’d eat a whole tub in one sitting. Likes chocolate chip, but when she’s feeling especially shitty she will branch out with stuff like caramel, chocolate etc. always with chunks tho, she loves chunks.

Samson: I know Americans make a difference between ice cream and gelato but I literally never knew what it was. Anyway Samson likes gelato. Probably cherry idk. There’s a super good cassata gelato at my local supermarket and I feel like he’d like that one but I don’t really know how to describe it lmao.

Azazel: another sweet tooth. I feel like he wouldn’t really have a favourite flavor bc he’d like way too many to decide. He’s always loved human food and is always down to try anything. I feel like he’d be interested in more uncommon flavours like popcorn (idk if its common over there, but I’ve never seen it here) or that raspberry and rosemary one i tried once. Or sea salt. WAIT almond ice cream with dried figs. That’s the one.

Lazarus: I have no idea how black walnut would taste. But I trust you.

Eden doesn’t eat, you’re right, but they might partake in the Human Activities from time to time. And when they’ll become human (spoiler) they’ll get to try a lot of different things! I feel like they’d have a very limited palate tho, kinda like a small child. So nothing too complicated, like strawberry.

Lilith: STRAWBEBBY one time I had a very good strawberry float with prosecco and it was so her. Fwendy would appreciate the cookie dough chunks tho, they can munch on them together u.u

Apollyon can’t eat :( but he’d like very basic flavours. There’s a flavour over here called fiordilatte that’s even more basic than vanilla, it literally tastes like milk, I think he would like that.

Bethany also strikes me as a mint chocolate chip girlie, I can see that. Lazarus knows that and always keeps it in the freezer so she doesn’t have to go without u.u

Jacob: mhmmmmmm very hard to figure out. I don’t really remember if he liked sweets or not, but peanut butter strikes that balance of not too sweet but still great so I can see him liking it.

Esau: isn’t Neapolitan like three flavours together mhmmmm he feels like a frozen yogurt kind of guy. With extra protein and fruit toppings.

[strandnreyes]

tagged by @alrightbuckaroo @carlos-in-glasses @reyesstrand <3

a little more than usual because it’s a nice and happy part for a change

“Alright, let’s go try this chocolate thunder brownie.”

“Do you think Mateo will kill me if I get something else?” Carlos asks as he gets out.

TK shoots him a look from over the top of the car. “Oh, please don’t tell me you’re one of those people who likes pistachio.”

“I wasn’t going to get pistachio.”

“It’s butter pecan, isn’t it?” he asks like he’s personally offended. “Carlos, you have to understand that that’s worse.”

Carlos ignores him, scanning the packed tables for an open one. Nancy seems to notice the problem, too. “Should we grab one while you order?” she offers.

“Sure,” Carlos nods, listening to their orders and then following TK to the line. 

“Maple Walnut? Rum Raisin?” he reads off the menu posted next to the window. “C’mon, which one of these monstrosities is your favorite?”

“They can probably hear you, you know.” 

“I don’t think that sixteen year old behind the counter will care too much that I think Rum Raisin is a bad flavor.” 

“What if that’s the one I want?”

TK stares at him, dead serious, and says, “I’m not buying that for you.” 

Carlos raises a brow. “I didn’t know you were buying it for me at all.” TK doesn’t say anything to that, still studying the menu, and Carlos adds, “I was going to get mint chocolate chip. Is that an acceptable flavor for you?” 

“Toothpaste?” TK looks disgusted and Carlos shakes his head, laughing. 

“You’re impossible,” he mutters until he sees TK’s grin that shows he’s just joking.

They place their order and TK pays for all of them without thinking twice. He shoves the rest of his change in the tip jar and then he and Carlos shuffle over to the pick up window. 

“I’ll take a bite of yours and maybe Mateo will spare me,” Carlos decides after TK actually ordered Mateo’s recommended flavor.

TK looks affronted as he pulls out a stack of napkins from the dispenser. “Who said you’re getting a bite of mine?”

“Payment for the ride.” 

TK purses his lips, a gleam in his eyes as he leans closer to Carlos and murmurs, “I didn’t know we had that type of arrangement, Carlos.”

“Shut up,” Carlos rolls his eyes, hiding his smile at TK actually mentioning their deeper relationship for once. 

The bored teenager chooses that moment to come over with four cones and they take two each, carrying them to the group and bending their legs awkwardly to sit down at the sticky picnic table. TK’s knee brushes against Carlos’ and it remains there all through Mateo’s interrogation on why Carlos’ ice cream is green and Carlos steals TK’s cone, taking a lick to say he tried it. TK pretends to be disgruntled with how unsanitary it is, but they both know that he’s not exactly a stranger to Carlos’ tongue.

They were one of the last ones in line for the day which means the place starts clearing out while they finish their ice cream. Carlos licks off the bit that dripped down his thumb and then smiles while TK tries to find the bit of chocolate on the corner of his mouth. Carlos has mercy on him and takes the napkin, wiping it away. 

It’s dark by the time they’re bidding goodnight to Nancy and Mateo and TK takes advantage of that, leaning over the middle console of the car to kiss Carlos. Their tongues swirl together in a mix of both of the flavors. 

As Carlos is about to break some speeding laws to get them back to the house, TK points him in a different direction instead. He ends up parked at the end of a dead end road overlooking the bay where TK clambers over into the driver’s seat as soon as the car is off. His elbow hits the horn, his head bumps the ceiling, and his knee comes too close for comfort for Carlos to be up for anything that’s about to happen, but eventually he makes it to Carlos’ lap, laughing as Carlos scoots the chair back and they fall into a kiss.

tagging @three-drink-amy @heartstringsduet @liminalmemories21 @rmd-writes @taralaurel @welcometololaland @hoko-onchi-writes if you’d like!

[mayalaen]

scoops ahoy specials

Pairing(s): Steddie Kinks: Blowjobs in kindasorta public Rating: Teen and Up Warnings/Triggers: None Prompt: Eddie is shameless and Steve is desperate. This is how he ends up having a conversation with his former math teacher about the limited time new flavours at Scoops while his boyfriend has some fun of his own behind the counter.

-

“It’s patriOTIC!” Steve yelps, knuckles turning white as he grips the countertop as though he will fall to his death if he lets go.

Mr. Lamonte frowns at him, the prude. “Excuse me?”

“The, uhm, the colors,” Steve says, sweat breaking out all over his body. “Our Red, White, and BluebERRY is just the thing!”

“May I have a sample?” Mr. Lamonte asks, peering at the ice cream through the glass.

“I’m sorry, but I’m all out of spoons today,” Steve says, shaking his head.

Mr. Lamonte scowls at him. “What other flavors are on special?”

“Oh, there’s so, so many!” Steve says breathlessly. “We’ve got coffee and dONUTS! Honey pistachio. Oatmeal RAISIN cookie. Oh, and my personal favorite is the CEREAL AND MILK ice cream.”

The man looks as though he’s ready to ask for the manager. “Give me two scoops of oatmeal raisin, Mr. Harrington. In a bowl.”

“Yes, sir,” Steve says, wincing when his jerky nod flings some sweat onto the countertop. “Have a seat and I’ll let you know when it’s ready.”

Mr. Lamonte tilts his head just a bit. “You’re not going to scoop it now?”

“No, sir, scooping ice cream is a very SPECIAL thing, and it can’t be rushed,” Steve says, his voice cracking and his knees threatening to go out from under him. “Have a seat ANYWHERE we’ll bring it out to you.”

“Don’t you want me to pay?” the man asks, fishing his wallet out of his boring brown slacks.

“It’s on the house!” Steve says, scared to reach up and wipe the sweat from his forehead because he thinks maybe his grip on the counter is the only thing tethering him to reality. “Because you were such a great teacher! It’s on the house! Just please sit down, sir, PLEASE!!”

The guy stares at him for an uncomfortably long period of time, but he finally snorts, shakes his head, and walks away, muttering something about those damn kids and the devil’s lettuce.

Steve immediately drops to his knees, glad that his idiot boyfriend anticipated the move and didn’t end up biting Steve’s dick off in the process. Eddie is scrunched into the tiny space between all the shit they’ve got under the counter.

Steve grabs Eddie’s arm with one hand and yanks his adorable little blue shorts up with the other, dragging his boyfriend through the door and into the back of the Scoops Ahoy! ice cream shop.

“Robin, get out front and get Mr. Lamonte ice cream! Now!” he says through clenched teeth, shoving Eddie against a wall and ripping Eddie’s belt and jeans open with fingers that barely work anymore.

Robin makes a disgusted noise as she walks by them, but she goes out front and takes are of Mr. Lamonte while Steve jacks them both off and comes with his face buried in Eddie’s chest.

[tarasinclair73]

Flash Enid AU Part 2

Next time they went there Tyler was also there. “Hey guys. Wednesday isn’t here, she is actually on a trip with her father.” He told them.

“It’s fine, the new girl made her sandwich last time. She actually made it right, unlike you who decided to add salmon to what was already a monstrosity.”

Tyler blinked, confused. “There’s no salmon?”

“No, also what is the new girls name?” Yoko asked Tyler.

“That’s Tara. Why?” he asked.

“Just wondering!” Yoko said and asked her usual and left.

************************************************************************

Tyler was curious why Yoko has asked about Tara, she was pretty sure but that was odd. “Hey, Tara you made Enid’s sandwich last time?”

“Yeah! Peanut butter, bananas, raisins, cheese… oh yeah, and honey on a roll!” Tara exclaimed.

“There’s no salmon?”

“Uh… no, Tyler,” she said.

“Wow…this whole time I thought it had salmon. Also Yoko asked about you.” He mentioned.

“Oh? Why?” Tara asked.

“I don’t know, her and Enid are best friend. Why I thought you would know.” He shrugged.

“Alright. I’ll go talk to them,” Tara replied with a small smile.

************************************************************************

Yoko took a bite of Enid’s sandwich and almost threw up. “Dude! That is disgusting!”

“Hey, you wanted to try it!” Enid complained.

“Would it kill you to get a normal breakfast sandwich? Do you have a normal ice cream order?”

“Pistachio ice cream with gummy bears.” Enid shrugged.

“Dude! I am calling the food police! Next you are going to say you anchovies on your pizza!”

“No but I do like pineapple.”

“How do you have two girls who like you and you eat like this?” Yoko was baffled.

“At least I am honest with what I like. Why do you have that look on your face? It’s like the Wednesday face but different.”

“What face? I’m not making a face,” Yoko replied. “Look, here comes Tara.”

“Do I have time to run away?” Enid asked.

“Hi guys!” Tara exclaimed. “How is the food? Salmon, right?” Tara laughed. “Just kidding! I have your order written down in the back.”

“I don’t like salmon,” Enid whined.

“Gross,” Yoko complained. “I am going to get a refill to wash the taste of your sandwich out of my mouth.”

“But didn’t you just get coffee?” Enid asked, but Yoko was already gone. She cleared her throat. “Right, well that was Yoko and I’m Enid.” Enid wasn’t sure what she was supposed to say.

“My name’s Tara,” Tara said. “So, did you enjoy your coffee?”

“Umm-which part?” Enid asked.

“The number you idiot!” Yoko has tossed a muffin at small muffin at Enid’s head.

“Ow! Did you just toss a muffin at me?”

“Yes! I’ll toss another at your face next!” Yoko turned back around to Tyler. “Sorry, add two small muffins to my tab.”

“So aggressive…” Enid trailed off. “Uh- yes about the number I was going to text you but then I got nervous and I didn’t…because I am not good at this honestly.” Enid blabbed on. “I save it in my phone though.” Enid added.

[ninoochat]

Weekly tag Wednesday !!

Thank you @transsexual-dandelions @atthedugouts @mickeym4ndy im doing it this time ^^

Name: Mina/Sara/Nin/depends where and when you catch me online

Age: 39

Location: satan's pubes south of france

top sheet, yes or no?: of course

how many stuffed animals do you own?: one bear i bought for myself 22 years ago

the names of your pets (and the explanations behind them): they're all dead and im done with pets i cant take any more loss

favorite color: green/yellow/purple

Any tattoos? no, i wish i could but it's the permanent nature of it all... id have gotten a cat and that stupid fucking libertines tattoo in carl barat's handwriting

how you transport your belongings (purse, tote, hands, pockets, etc.): i got a small murky green cross body bag. i hate that pockets are too small because i really never have more than my phone, keys, earbuds and my wallet. since i have the bag i also have a pack of kleenex and some bandages because my feet always blister but i could go without.

the last movie you watched: challengers

how long does it take you to get ready in the morning?: 5 minutes and it's mostly me cursing at my fucking curly hair that i hate with every fiber of my being

favorite weather: when i dont have to be outside? dark grey apocalyptic thunderstorm and heavy rain/wind. end of the world type shit. best sleeps of my life. when i do need to be outside: dark grey, light or no rain, gloomy.

relationship status: ready to jump ship

ice cream flavor of choice: rum raisin/mint chocolate chip/pistachio/praliné

first fandom: fandom as in being obsessed with the media and talking about it with friends at recess? probably batman the animated series (1992). i was harley quinn my bff was the joker and this one white boy in our class was batman. except the plot everyday was us villains "torturing" batman. like we'd have him lay down on benches and pretend he was tied up and we'd fake drop acid on him and chemicals from empty bottles of water. it was all good fun we didnt bully the guy i know how it sounds lol we had notebooks to write back and forth as our characters and we'd chase each other

how many books have you read this year?: 0. i used to be so ashamed but now im like it is what it is. in 2022 i got a kobo and i made myself read 9 books. last year i read 2, then i quit again :/

first 4 words of your last notes app entry: i dont use one i use ✨ paper and pens ✨

and finally, if you had to change your URL tomorrow, what would you change it to?: something unrelated to fandom because i know ill change too often or something related to ian and mickey because i am weak

Tagging anyone who wants to i guess

[sarnai4]

Icy Delights

Few things make me happier than ice cream. So, with the approaching summertime, I wanted to imagine RTTE characters at an ice cream parlor.

Hiccup: He's getting a banana split because it's customizable. There just isn't a world where Hiccup isn't making something. The owners at the shop probably named some special version of the split after him and now, it's one of their best sellers. As a result, they like him showing up.

Astrid: If they offer spicy flavors, she's getting those or the tartest ones. She's convinced they're going to make her tougher in the process. The story workers are always amused/horrified by what she ends up getting. To make matters a bit better, she gets a cone too.

Snotlout: He samples everything. EVERYTHING. The store owners are this close to hating him, but he does at least buy a triple scoop afterwards. There's no particular flavor he's looking for. He just knows he can try them all and is making the most of that.

Tuffnut: He gets the world's most elaborate sundae. It's actually impressive how much attention the workers need to pay if they're going to get this order right. Only a cherry and chocolate sauce on the whipped cream overtop the flavor on the left, please. The employees almost hate him too because of this, but his friends tip well to make up for this.

Ruffnut: She religiously gets flavors with nuts in them because she feels like it's required with her name. Black walnut, pistachio, butter pecan...if they're not offering one with nuts, she's getting some mixed in. An added bonus is that she can throw them at Tuffnut and anyone else who gets in her line of fire.

Fishlegs: He's getting the largest amount of scoops that can reasonably be sold to an individual. The store owners love him because they know they're getting a minimum of $20 off his order alone. No worries. He'll eat it before anything melts.

Dagur: He makes it a mission to eventually order every flavor, but he won't get samples. He believes that's cheating. So, he goes all in and just deals with the consequences if he hates a certain type. The others try to talk him out of this plan. It never works. If he's got a flavor Snotlout likes, the dark-haired guy will sometimes try to steal a spoonful. He gets growled at whenever this happens (even if Dagur doesn't like the flavor. It's the principle of the matter).

Heather: She's getting the Neapolitan flavors either all together or separately. There's probably a fruit toppling too if that's an option. Her order is easy, so the employees try to do it first. Then she can just watch the chaos ensue while she's enjoying the dessert.

Mala: She's getting sorbets and gelato because those are the fancier flavors. Her order is taken somewhere in the middle because she knows it's going to take forever to wait for Tuffnut, but she also wants to consider her options well enough. By the time she and Dagur have theirs, they are happily sitting off in a corner of the shop, feeding each other.

Throk: He's always taking forever because he's trying to decide what flavor would complement a nut without seeming obvious that it's his goal, but if Ruffnut WANTS to share...then he's ready. What a coincidence😉.

Stoick: He just get a milkshake. To him, it's how the ice cream is going to end up anyway. Getting scoops is delaying the inevitable and too youthful for him. He'll leave it to the younger ones.

Gobber: Gives zero darns about ice cream melting or seeming youthful. He's getting the alcoholic flavors like tequila and rum raisin to see if he'll get tipsy or not. (Spoiler. He does)

[thisiswhereikeepdcthings]

Met Brucie Wayne at an ice cream parlor the other day where he was trying to get a long list of orders for his kids. He saw my girl scout troop come in and just told the poor cashier to add our order to his bill. He also argued with Emily about how she was objectively wrong for getting Pistachio for like ten minutes before upgrading her order to the largest size.

While the poor workers were busy making thirty orders he sat with us and talked about his own adventures, and despite claiming that he never went camping before he somehow did a better job of explaining knot tying and triage than our scout leaders did. He also took a billion selfies with us, but insisted on using filters for all of them. Bridget tried to explain GORP to him, and he was so confused at the concept, he looked like a puppy. "So it's Good Old Raisins and Peanuts, but you don't use Peanuts anymore because of allergies? Why is it still GORP? Can you add swedish fish? You shouldn't, swedish fish suck."

When everyone's orders were finally done he took our a stack of hundred-dollar bills and put it in the tip jar, before carrying over a dozen ice cream cups and cones to his car without spilling any of them.

I don't know what's wrong with him but I hope he never changes.

Brucie Wayne living his best himbo life and occasionally displaying hyper competence at the most random moments is everything. Bless Gotham’s little sunshine child. He’s probably the most well adjusted gothamite here.

[aiweirdness]

AI-generated donuts

If you're going to open a late-night donut shop, you're going to need a unique set of over-the-top donuts to set the proper festive atmosphere. But how to keep the ideas coming?

I decided to see what donut ideas I could get using OpenAI's GPT-3 text-generating models. I collected seven of the weirdest donuts and descriptions I could find (such as a pizza donut, or a dirt-themed donut), and presented them as a list for the AI to complete. I've drawn a few of the best donuts it added to the list.

[human illustrations of some of the ai-generated donuts below]

When I say I used "GPT-3" for this project it's hard to be exact about it, because OpenAI often updates the models. The newest GPT-3 versions (as of May 2022) actually did the worst at this task - they kept presenting me with real donuts that they'd seen during their online training, and not even particularly weird donuts. They were trying to match what was most common online, not what I was asking for. But the original early-2020 GPT-3 models were more willing to deliver the weirdness. Here are some more of my favorite results from the various models!

The biggest model, DaVinci

Violet Beauregarde - A lemon glazed donut with blue raspberry eyes and a raspberry center The Candleberry Flu - A chocolate doughnut filled inside with ganache plus a dripping candle on top that's dripping liquid sediments Brick of Yum - A glazed doughnut sandwiching American cheese, with red pepper jelly inside The Confusatron - A doughnut sliced into three layers - vanilla, coconut, and chocolate, dipped in chocolate ganache and topped with sugar pearls that look like circuit boards The Purple Stuff - Chocolate, oreo, and purple stuff sprinkled with powdered sugar

Curie, the second-largest model

Heckleberry - A strawberry donut smothered with blueberry syrup and crushed vegan Crunchies Donut of Doom - Rainbow donut filled with Frosted Flakes, black sprinkles, and sour candy The Alligator Rising - A spiral donut, frosted with chocolate and filled with a filling of chocolate hard-boiled egg and green apple slices Hell Raisin - A jelly donut with a filling of peanut butter and hot dogs Dark Crystal - A donut filled with candy corn and white chocolate chips I ♥ My Gay Ex - A rainbow Jell-O donut with white frosting, red sugar sprinkles, and pink glitter Fish N' Chips – Topped with chocolate and tangy tempura-flavoured icing

Babbage, the second-smallest model

Mr Crepe - Topped with tapioca pudding, green sprinkles Little Red Apples - Topped with pumpkin bread crumbs and small red apples Chalkista - Stationary donut with chalk dusting Horns - Cupcake gripped in both of the animal’s horns Julius Rooms - A pair of bottomless donuts Doughnut Forest - A profusion of donuts spread throughout the French Quarter Flintlock fennec - bacon, fried okra, and burnt thermochromic alcohol Baffle - cocoa powder, giraffes, and vanilla wafers

Ada, the smallest and definitely weirdest model

Bath Roll - Three donuts melted hot on one side Friar Flats - Topped with tomatoes, honey, red paint and ceramic chili caps Ponder Owls - magical, yellow-feathered donuts covered in icing with puffiness and shine By Soul - filled with firecrackers, black bean dip, red pepper syrup, and watermelon Coconut Fun - Sulphure hasn’t been wiped off, a demon cake filled with coconut cream and pistachios Blood Donut - Creamy moist donut topped with spoonfuls of delicious blood Goofy Trick - the elephant, is a clown and it's all about tossing treats into his skull Spankin’ - Other-colored donut with a frying pan in the middle

Bonus content: More of Ada's weird donuts (plus some donuts made of antimatter??)

Also you can buy the donuts on a tea towel! Along with pies, cookies, and breakfast cereals.

[theevangelion]

Soulmates: Chapter VI

(Previous Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

The park left Kara wondering what the first possibly had to offer that the second most-charming didn’t. She was unsure if it was a date, whether it could even be a date, because Lena had been married. She had never heard of someone having more than one soulmate and really…

Kara wasn’t interested in waiting out the inevitable by wasting Lena’s time.

It was why she was on the dating site. The only dating site. It was less about connecting with strangers and more about matching soulmates, through data algorithms, who simply couldn’t hold out long enough for life to do what life does best—bring them together when the universe felt ready for another happily ever after.

It was computer science that Kara couldn’t quite wrap her brain around. But the statistics were good, the data reliable, and that was why she personally paid for her membership.

It had been a process of intensive questionnaires, psychological profiling, and even if a person didn’t have the full name from their birthmark, there was still a very good chance of hurrying things along. That was how it had been sold to Kara by her friends at least, the small few who had found their soulmates, and they all swore by it.

Sure, maybe it wasn’t as romantic as brushing shoulders at the state fair, seeing their own names cursive and scrawled upon the flesh of another, just like grandma and grandpa once did, but the website had its merits too.

You could enter letters as they became distinguishable, which the system then analysed and ruled out other profiles without those letters, increasing the visibility of other profiles who entered some variation of letters that could be a possible match to your name too.

Kara had zero profiles, zero matches, and she felt that was a good thing.

It meant that she only needed that one dinging notification on her phone to know she had found the love of her life.

“Can I ask a personal question?”

“It’s our third time hanging out and all we’ve done the previous two times is talk personal questions and prying assumptions about one another’s life, it would be weird if you didn’t ask a personal question.” Lena plonked down on the bench, licking her gelato. “I got pistachio, but I assumed you would prefer rum and raisin.”

“That’s an awfully bold assumption.” Kara smirked and felt funny. “Nobody likes rum and raisin.”

“You do.”

“Do not, it’s only my second favourite flavour.”

“Vanilla being the first?” Lena cocked a knowing look. “It’s under there. Two scoops. You were spoiled.”

“How could you possibly…” Kara went bright eyed, confused, and she swallowed hard. “How—I don’t.” She shook her head.

Was Lena her soulmate?

“Oh.” Lena jolted and seemed to realise the weirdness. “Kara, I apologise. Your Instagram. There was a photograph of vanilla bean ice cream, with a scoop of rum and raisin on the side, I think you put something about them being the greatest combination. I don’t know. I just…I remembered?” She shrugged and seemed embarrassed.

“Oh. Oh!” Kara laughed and felt stupid. “Of course, sure, yes. Jesus. I should tone down my Instagram…”

“Don’t.” Lena brushed it off. “Your Instagram is fun. I like seeing when you’re in the forbidden glass elevator, it lets me know Catherine is out of the city on business. Anyway, you were going to ask a personal question?”

“I should warn you that it’s really personal.”

“Sure, we’ve done that before, yes.” Lena nodded and licked her ice cream.

“Is there like, dating websites, you know for…” The question made Lena stop licking, and she pulled back straight with an awkward expression at the question put to her. “I’m so sorry. Please, forget I asked, that was so rude of me.”

“No, I’m just trying to figure how to answer your question because I think your question proposes something that…” Lena came undone as though she didn’t know how to explain herself. “Are you asking me if there are dating websites for people who, for whatever reason, are not with their soulmate?” She asked softly.

“Yeah.” Kara nodded. “I figure there must be. I know this might sound silly, but I haven’t met someone as young or, you know, as beautiful as you, who has gone through this kind of thing? It’s not like my grandpa was thinking about dating after grandma passed. They got to have a lifetime together.”

“I got a lifetime too, just a little shorter than most I guess.” Lena pushed a little smile. “I don’t have a birthmark so I can’t be sure Sam was my soulmate.”

“What?” Kara’s eyes went wide.

“Oh, yep! There’s a few of us.” Lena grinned as though she loved being the person to reveal this oddity to someone who never considered the possibility before. “Some lost a limb before their birthmark came through, there's people with skin conditions, then there's a few like me.” Lena nodded. “My parents took me to the doctor as a baby—they were so concerned—but it turns out a handful of people, every once in a while, are born without fate scorched on their flesh like an Orwellian horror story.”

“I don’t know whether that’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard.” Kara pulled back and didn’t know such a thing even existed.

“I hated it as a kid. I felt like some kind of freak. But these days? There’s something pleasantly less…kill myself about the possibility of there being love again.” Lena did the acerbic, pointed, absolutely not-funny thing that was funny enough to make Kara laugh despite not wanting to.

“Is that something you want?” Kara smiled. “Love again?”

“Perhaps, one day. Once—” Lena faintly circled and gestured at her heart as though dust were still settling. Her eyes were sap green, half-lidded, sad, and yet hopeful for better days, and Kara saw that despite never feeling quite that good at picking people apart. “It gets better every day, or just more refined maybe. Missing her for a moment, feeling sad, then picking life up again and finishing whatever I had been doing. So, Kara Danvers, when the cows come home, perhaps it would not be all that terrible to share a toothbrush holder with someone again. I'm not sure about marriage, but you'll tell me if you see any charming young widows in funeral processions going up to City Crematorium who would look much prettier in white?” Her eyes brightened with amusement.

“Shut up.” Kara licked her ice cream, then elbowed the snarker sat beside her on the bench. “You're repugnant.”

“Big word. You should get in on the action with mine and James' rolling game of Words With Friends.”

“If it isn't a little presumptive or rude to ask—”

“Oh, it will be.” Lena had no doubts. “But that isn't to say I mind, I'm very much enjoying this game of ours, so go right ahead.”

“If you didn't have Sam's name then how...” She had been given clear permission and yet Kara felt it could all still come tumbling down. What business was it of hers? She couldn't stop herself. Lena was too interesting, human, and lovely to enjoy a midday ice cream with, so Kara grew brave. “Was Sam like you?”

She chickened out at the last minute.

She wanted to ask their story, their history, how Lena could possibly know the marriage had bones in the absence of a soulmate marking.

Maybe if there was another ice cream date, Kara figured.

“Sam’s birthmark cleared with my name somewhere between friendship and... more than friendship. So, it would be quite strange if we weren't soulmates. That would be strange, right? If there's another Lena out there somewhere meandering through life unaware my Sam ever existed. Maybe she thinks she’s waiting for a Samuel instead of a Samantha?” Kara didn't think it was likely, but she nodded and watched Lena furrow in thought. “Can you imagine how annoying it must be to have a common name as your birthmark? You just spend forty years calling every John, in every phone book, in every town, like a misfortunately abundant lifetime of John?”

“Okay, now you’re making me nervous! What if my birthmark says Jane?” Kara exasperated.

“You like girls?” Lena twisted in surprise at that.

“I figure so.” Kara shrugged. “I feel like my soulmate is a girl. Do you just like girls or…”

“Just women, sure, but again, I hold out hope one of the other markless folk might find me some years from now and prove pleasant enough for a life idled through slowly with decidedly less car crashes than my last marriage, and so if that sensible Sunday driver is a man? He may very well be a man worth spending my life with...”

“That one wasn’t funny.” Kara pushed Lena’s arm, both of them giggling in spurts of guilty laughter. “You are a sick woman, who needs therapy, and also another ice cream. Shit, I’m so sorry I knocked that out of your hand...” Kara reached for napkins to clean her up.

“No, stop, you’re fine.” Lena sighed. “It was a pretty dark joke.”

“You must have really loved her.” Kara observed and felt some sorrow.

Lena stopped at that with an indiscernible expression. “You think?”

“You’re a good person, Lena. Good people only make jokes like that when absolutely certain everyone is in on the laugh. So, I figure, you must have really loved her, and she must have really loved your gross sense of humour.” Kara scoffed and licked her ice cream. “You like vanilla?” She offered some over. “Don’t make me feel bad for knocking your ice cream—you have to eat some if you like vanilla.”

Lena paused with a little shine to her eyes, a little wobble to her lips, and despite seeing it for what it was, Kara didn’t point any of it out.

“I like vanilla,” she murmured quietly and took a taste. “Thanks, Kara.”

[denkamis]

TOKEN MACHINE.

prompts for requests.

👾 front desk. 👾 help desk.

“so uh... can i borrow a dollar?”

requests are currently closed!

current requests: [7]

rules. | masterlist. [read these first please!!]

notes: aight ladies, gents & gorgeous they/thems, i made a prompts list incase u wanna request anything specific from me! essentially just choose the ice cream flavour that goes with the prompt & 1-5 characters from my masterlist, and i’ll write u hc’s, a drabble, or a oneshot depending if i’m feeling inspired. or you can suggest what type you want! this is just to help requests come in. and you can always suggest your own as well :)) now, would you like a single scoop or a double?

prompts are a mix from tumblr, pinterest, & stuff i came up with on my own! if all prompts are used up, i will update them :))

FLUFF

bubblegum: “is there a reason why you’re blushing so much?”

cherry: kaminari + “can we stay like this forever?”

cotton candy: “sleep over? please?”

strawberry: “are we on a date right now?”

caramel: “am i your lockscreen?” “you weren’t supposed to see that.”

banana: “i think i’m in love with you.”

double chocolate: kaminari, shinsou, & midoriya + “it’s okay, i couldn’t sleep anyways.”

gingerbread: kirishima + “you make me so proud, y’know that?”

vanilla: “it’s not bad to cry. in fact, i think it makes you stronger.”

peach: “i think you’d make a pretty great parent.”

ANGST

peanut butter: kirishima, bakugou, & amajiki + “why are you lying to me?”

coffee: “i’m worried about you.”

rum raisin: “do you even still love me?”

rocky road: todoroki + “we’re in public, knock it off.”

pistachio: “why do you like him so much?”

maple: “stop running from your feelings.”

red bean: “i loved you.” “you left me!”

red velvet: “we shouldn’t be doing this. it’s wrong.”

neopolitan: “you lost your chance.”

raspberry: “are you happy now? does this make you happy?”

CRACK

cookie dough: “on the bright side, we know not to cook next time!”

butterscotch: “what are you talking about? i’m very mature!”

s’mores: “how drunk was i?”

hazelnut: “i’m hungry.” “i’m not moving.”

cookies n cream: “just pretend to be my date, please!”

birthday cake: “stop texting me weird stuff at night- oh god.”

blueberry cheesecake: “think fast!”

key lime: “it’s actually a hobby of mine to prove you wrong.”

mango: bakugou + “um, how long have you been standing there?”

peppermint: “and you’re asking me for advice?”

all works © denkamis 2021.

[vegetalass]

RDR2 Boys Cooking + Eating Habits

Arthur 

Somebody else on here wrote some headcanons about Arthur not being able to cook and just eating microwave food all the time and I just have to say…. That’s canon 

Lowkey though he’s trying his best to get better at cooking

Probably the only thing he knows how to make is pasta 

He adds a bunch of random frozen veggies to water as the noodles are cooking 

And then smothers the whole thing in butter and calls it a meal

Or he puts marinara sauce on it straight from the jar 

And yes, that means it’s cold

He’s also getting better at friend rice, too

But he’s really bad at actually making rice 

If he doesn’t add too much water… He burns the bottom 

Charles makes a mental note to buy him a rice cooker for his birthday 

Makes his own popsicles out of random fruit juices and eats them 24/7 

Thinks this qualifies him as a chef

Eats pickles and olives straight out of the jar with a fork 

And sauerkraut too probably 

Just goes over to john’s house on his pizza nights 

Puts ketchup on eggs

John 

Pizza dad 

Probably orders pizza, salad, and a 64oz soda twice a week 

Everything else is just Dino chicken nuggets, Eggos, hot dogs, quesadillas, and frozen peas and corn 

Food you feed to little kids, basically 

Mostly because he does have a little kid 

But also because it’s easy and takes minimal effort and he doesn’t mind eating it, too

Abigail would be mad but she has no room to talk

The most you’ll see him actually make is buttered pasta (like Arthur) or sometimes beans and rice 

Abigail bought them a rice cooker a while ago so that’s one thing he doesn’t have to worry about 

Probably always has some type of dessert laying around 

Doesn’t mean it’s good, but it’s there 

Abigail buys a bunch of those gross, low calorie ice creams and John ends up having to finishing them 

Family lunches consist of a bologna sandwich on wheat bread with American cheese and mayo, a piece of fruit, a bag of chips or crackers, a go-gurt, and some gummies 

And yes he makes them for himself and Abigail too 

They’re all eating good at the Marston household 

(Not really)

Charles 

Everything he cooks are things that can’t be made in single batches 

Lots of healthy soups, chilis, stew, etc…

Most of the time, he makes too much of whatever it is so he always has leftovers 

Everyone is jealous when he brings them for lunch

Probably finds all of his recipes in the newspaper or random magazines he reads while at the grocery store checkout line

Everyone is like, “Charles… Why are you reading Women’s Fitness?” 

And he’s like, “Check out this salad recipe, though”

Puts hot sauce on everything 

Salad, macaroni and cheese, hamburgers... You name it 

And he’s the king of snacking

All of his snacks are healthy, though

Raw veggies and fruit and quinoa chips from Whole Foods or something like that

Nobody likes this

He’s one of those people who brings hard boiled eggs everywhere as a “snack,” too

And yea, he puts hot sauce on those, also 

He really likes those weird protein bars that are hard to bite into and taste like chalk 

The flavors are either normal stuff like white chocolate macadamia or Protein Power Punch with whey, chia and seaweed 

There’s no in between 

He’s also a charcuterie board legend

Hosea is jealous of this talent

Micah

Spends all his money on take out 

He’s totally one of those weird people who’s entire trash can is just filled with take out boxes and cans of coke or beer

Constantly eating fast food 

You ask him what he bought at the supermarket and he’s like “Pub mix and bud light” 

SIR 

Everything that he does manage to cook only involve one step of preparation 

Unseasoned, fried meats and boiled veggies 

Sometimes scrambled eggs and bacon

If he’s feeling fancy, he will make plain sandwiches

This is very rare, though

Can and will complain about anyone’s cooking

Even if it’s good and he he likes it

There are certain people he can’t do this to, though, or they won’t let him eat

The only person’s cooking he doesn’t complain about is Dutch’s

Constantly snacking from an entire party sized bag of chips

And yes, he eats straight out of the bag and wipes his fingers on his jeans

His oven is dirty

Hosea 

A meal for him is probably a handful of almonds and an applesauce or yogurt cup 

He is constantly making a bunch of those Tik Tok recipes where you just put a bunch of random stuff into your crock pot and add ranch seasoning and cream cheese

*insert all of those memes about mom pulling out the crock pot*

If you complain, he says “Well, you’re always welcome to cook, too”

Wears an apron when he cooks

Constantly eating plain toast with butter

And bananas 

And cheese sticks

Thinks that this makes him “healthy” 

Definitely likes to snack on those cocktail fruit cups and canned mandarin oranges

His entire freezer is just full of ice cream 

It’s all weird flavors like Cherry Garcia, chocolate banana, and pistachio though

Everyone hates him for this

Raisins are his late night treat 

Has a secret stash of candy no one can find 

That’s okay though because it’s mostly Werthers Originals

And Chiclets gum

He picks out all the orange ones, though

Dutch

Tries to re-plate takeout so he can call it his own

Everybody sees through this but they stopped commenting on it like four Thanksgivings ago 

Buys a bunch of those meals from Costco that all you need to do is heat up in the oven

He does like fast food but only from the less popular places

Carl’s Jr., Wendy’s, BK, Arby’s, etc. 

A&W, too, because he’s old and weird

He can totally cook, he just never does 

It’s just normal stuff like spaghetti and meatballs or chicken and rice, though

Tuna fish casserole

He over-seasons everything, though

Mostly because he’s trying to prove that he’s a good cook 

Eats dessert twice, every night 

Once right after dinner, and then later when he’s feeling like a treat 

Will eat in bed

Uses a little bib and tray and everything 

Likes pumpkin and sunflower seeds

Would eat hot wings with gloves on 

He’s the one who taught Arthur to put ketchup on eggs 

Kieran 

The second I realized that Kieran would probably be white trash, my life changed 

Hamburger Helper meals for LIFE

That one cheeseburger pasta? Kieran probably eats that three times a week 

He 100% makes the ketchup-butter sketti from Honey Boo Boo 

“It’s been a while since I done had roadkill in my belly”

His favorite dessert is ambrosia salad or that weird yogurt/Cool Whip covered jello that was popular in the 2000s

Probably has a TV dinner every once in a while, too

Instant mashed potatoes and minute rice type of guy 

Also gives me big microwave cheddar broccoli vibes 

I’ve said this before, but his house is probably stocked with all kinds of on-brand goodies 

Probably always has some kind of chip and cookie around 

Eats dinner in front of the TV

Dips french fries in mayonnaise

All of this said though, he isn’t a picky eater and will eat whatever is put on his plate 

That’s why he’s great to take to restaurants, because he never complains

Honestly it’s just so sweet to think of him making big crockpot meals to share with ppl even if his cooking is a lil.... strange 

Javier

Thinks that the hot dog combo from Costco is a suitable dinner 

Also gets hot food from the grocery store for dinner a lot

Literally will just heat up a can of something and eat it plain 

Beans, chili, soup… 

Doesn’t doctor it up or change it at all 

He’s happy to share but no one wants any

Chips and dip, 24/7

And it’s just Tostitos Hint of Lime chips and hummus

Probably puts hummus on everything, too 

Corn chips, tortilla chips, tortillas, vegetables, sandwiches, etc. 

Will put anything in a tortilla and call it a sandwich 

Eats leftovers cold 

The rest of the gang thinks this is a sin

Makes stir fry with whatever is laying around the house

It’s a little gross because he will try to add leftover beans

Refuses to eat fast food

The only exception he’ll make is for french fries and ice cream

Walks around and eats at the same time

Isn’t above asking the other boys to share with him 

Despite the fact that this only happens if what they’re eating is good

Which is almost never

Sean

Sean can’t cook. That’s the end of it

The most he can make is that weird microwave Mac and cheese where the pasta is boiled in the mug?? 

He never does it tho and just sticks with the normal, frozen Mac and Cheese you can microwave instead

Uses his microwaving ability to make mug cakes

And microwave scrambled eggs

Burns his popcorn every single time

He’s probably set of the smoke detector or fire alarm multiple times

He’s Irish though so of course he’s addicted to potatoes and cabbage

And since he’s from the UK, he likes stuff like beans on toast and marmite

He’s a little nasty too so catch him eating bologna sandwiches on wonder bread

Not even the Marstons are that bad

When he does get takeout, he overspends trying to use a delivery app 

He’s like, “And do I need the extra side of special sauce for $5…? Yes.” 

Cooks like this