Things the five MCs 5 not allowed to do:
MC1-(Summoners) from Shiro & Toji
1- A stunned moment of silence means "My God, what have you done?" Not "please continue."
2- You're not allowed to skip class and meet up with Tetsuox to beat up weaker delinquents who are on both of your Guilds turf.
3- Stop "accidentally" spilling food all over Marduk, just because you think his dragon eating him is funny. Nobody wants to see that. lt's gross and awkward.
4- All though Surtr & Bablon both appreciate the somewhat kind gesture, please stop beating anyone who deliberately calls Bablon by her other "name."
5- Stop flirting with Jugo when he's in the middle of practice or egging on Orochi to rip Jugo's clothes off during practice.
6- Stop waking up Shennong in the middle of the night for breast milk. He's poisonous, you little gremlin.
7- Just like Ryota, you're not allowed to cook anything inside of the kitchen without supervision. Choji still refuses to speak to you after you created that abomination.
8- You're no longer allowed to play unwinnable games or play Mario Kart with Ahura Mazda. You knew what you were doing with that Blue Shell.
9- A lot of the outfits in Tokyo are "very revealing" were asking you nicely to stop referring it to a "pussy out" look.
10- You're no longer allowed to make an Only Fans for extra Guild money. Bribing the staff won't work again.
---
MC2-(Missionaries) from Jacob & Maria
1- Whenever you're gaming with Tsathoggua and the others again, please refrain from saying, "How about I f*ck you're dad and give him a son he'll actually love" to sexist individuals. We got a ton of angry calls from parents across Tokyo from your live streams with Tindalos.
2- Stop telling Temujin that you'd rather get knocked up by Ulaan. Temujin wouldn't leave the property because he was angry looking for you in a fit of rage. Quit giving Maria grey hairs. No one wants him here.
3- Whenever you're having your girls' night, avoid going to places that are usually filled with rude men from now on. We'd appreciate it if you,Hekate,Ellie,Melusine and etc. Would stop looking for fights.
4- Stop calling Hati a simp, he apologized for being manipulated by Nyarl.
5- Stop trying to hook up Nyarl and Zabaniyya. Nyarl doesn't mind, but Zab most certainly does.
6- Stop calling Tezcatlopica, Balor's bottom bitch. I don't care how funny you and Tanetomo think it is.
7- Stop pretending to drown, just so you can either Makara or Gurangatch perform CPR on you. They're both worried about losing you forever. And I know you didn't enjoy it when Fuxi did it that one time instead, maybe that'll teach you a lesson on pretending to drown is bad, m'kay.
8- Stop taking naps on Arsalan, I know he doesn't mind, but I hate having to wash your clothes more than I should because they're covered in oil.
9- Stop letting Ellie drink your blood. I don't care how much you both enjoy it. The angels didn't like seeing that. They think it's gross.
10- I know about you and Azazel search history. Please delete that, and I mean ALL of it. I'll give you three Tickets if you do.
---
MC3-(Berserkers) from Snow.
1- I'd appreciate it if you didn't always clothesline people who either accidentally or deliberately speak inappropriately in front of Echo.
2- Please be careful whenever you're complimenting or flirting with with Cthuga again. You caused him to create a massive forest fire near Chernobog's Moutain, and you're both lucky the authorities haven't found out about it yet, thanks to Claude covering for you.
3- Garmr is not your personal attack dog, and he's not allowed to sleep in your room anymore. His howling is too much, especially at night.
4- No, I won't tell you where the milk from came from. It's a secret.
5- Stop giving Claude dumb ideas for events. Please come to me first for any ideas you have in mind from now.
6- Just because you can doesn't mean you should. And just because you should doesn't mean you can.
7- No ice cream sandwiches inside of the toasters. I don't care if you and Bathym managed to get Ikutoshi to laugh because of the result of it. It wasn't worth it.
8- Asking Belphegor to "clean out your pipes" is right out, when his shift is over. You stop that. Let him rest.
9- Stop calling yourself Tokyo's Hottest Himbo. Echo won't stop repeating it.
10- If you,Bathym, and Cthugha would find somewhere to smoke a "joint," then I'd stop dousing you with water. We don't need you stinking up the place. Maybe that'll teach you that doing drugs is bad, m'kay?
---
MC4- (Tycoons) from Gyumao
1- Even though I appreciate you as my business partner. Please stop complimenting the employees so frequently. They're fishing for your favoritism now.
2- Shino and Choji aren't allowed to get special treatment from me. I know you love them a lot, but I have Barguest and Snow. I need to treat them like that. When you start your own business, then you can spoil them. Other than that, refrain from asking.
3- I appreciate you calling me your dad, but please don't call me "Big Daddy" it's embarrassing, especially in front of our employees.
4- Please stop joining in the fights with the other head Tycoons. Stuff around here is expensive.
5- Licht isn't allowed to paint you naked anymore, thanks to a certain fight breaking out at the museum because everyone wanted to steal that painting of you.
6- We're allowing you to keep all that money you won, but you're not allowed to use anything at the Casino anymore. Your luck at the slot machines and gambling is unnatural, and we don't want to make others think you're cheating.
7- Stop sleeping around with your besties at the same time, you're all loud as hell, Bohemio and Sanzo are rubbing off on you.
8- Unless you actually plan on adopting them, stop referring the 8 Dog Warriors as my grandchildren. I already had Yoshito,Yasuyori, and Mussashi call me gramps. I don't like feeling old.
9- No, we are not doing a Maid Café, Melusine thinks it's degrading. And it doesn't matter what the other maids think because they'll just blindly agree with you.
10- No, you can't suck on my breath for milk just because you're too lazy to go downstairs and get some milk in the fridge. And stop asking Barguest if either my milk or Snow's milk tastes better. It's inappropriate... It's his.
10- Stop calling Korpokkur and Micheal a "lying little abortions" I can't risk having my business partner get canceled for insulting ageless children.
---
MC5- (Outlaws) from Gyobu
1- Even though we know Ryota is completely harmless and means well. Please let us know when he's coming over, Tetsuya still gets upset when you invite him over.
2- I know how much you hate Fuxi and the World Reps in general compared to your siblings. But please stop calling the Cops on our turf to arrest him because he broke into your room. We can handle it ourselves. We're meant to help you.
3- Please don't ever point out how all of the Outlaws have friends outside of the Guild who frequently visit unannounced. Tetsuya clearly didn't appreciate that being pointed out to him.
4- Marchiosias doesn't want Ellie following you to the Gurus Guild because he's very adamant about it, too. So please carefully watch your surroundings. She has a habit of following you. Same with the Summoners Guild.
5- You're not allowed to sneak over at the Warmonger's base to leave multiple cardboard cutouts of Yoshitune surrounding Yoritomo, just so he can suffer from a massive panic attack... again.
6- You deserve getting punched in the face for calling Suzuka a tsundere. She's your friend who asks to be treated with respect, please treat her accordingly.
7- Please stop making passive-aggressive comments to rude customers. We still appreciate you making everyone laugh because of it, but we don't need bad reviews.
8- Tsukuyomi appreciates you being his brother, stop coming up with fancy names for him. They're dumb regardless of what he thinks. You can still call him "Moon Man"
9- Just because Tetsuox calls you boss doesn't mean you should pay him, he already has a job.
10- Stop calling me your dad just because I'm dating Marchiosias. I already have 808 kids plus his child. I'm not sure I'm ready for a trouble magnet like you.
---
All Five from Mr. Mononobe
1- Please calm down and stop being extremely hostile towards Christine, I don't prefer her over you five. Same with Kirito.
2- No, I'm not paying for any of future weddings. You guys have an alarming number of people you're dating. Especially MC2 and MC4.
3- I appreciate you guys treating Furufumi as a seventh sibling, but maybe hang out with one or two at a time. He's still not comfortable hanging out with all of you at once.
4- Even though they deserve it, stop manipulating and gaslighting the Worlds Reps by using any information you have of the Exiles. I don't care if Micheal,Tez or Perun deserve it.
5- I swear, if I get another noise complaint from you're respective neighbors, because you five don't know how to keep your legs closed.
6- No, I won't ever make duplicates of Lil' Salomon. I know you love him. He does appreciate that you guys like him that much.
7- Hearing anyone make a racist comment directed to any of your friends isn't an excuse to jump them at once.
8- I'm not abusing my power to eliminate all of the World Reps at once, I have rules against me for that.
9- Stop trying to get me another romantic partner. Chernobog is great as is, I'm not you five. I have standards.
10- Once you five do finally graduate, then I'll allow you to drink with me. Just don't let anyone else know. Other than that, stop asking asking to go to the bar with me and the other teachers.
36 notes
·
View notes
How’d the high heel challenge go? Or are you guys still preparing for it?
"Guhhh! I wished nobody would remember that challenge! Damn it!..."
"Umm, Heph...I-I wanted to ask you about that challenge, I heard it was livestreamed but I had a study session because I was on exams' week"
After make his little huff and calm himself, Hephaestus decides to tell his experience at that challenge
"F-Fine...Talos, bring some drinks and snacks please, this will be a long tale to tell..."
"Coming right up, Creator!"
Talos brings a jug of iced tea and glasses and a plate full of snacks while Hephaestus fix his lab to make it comfortable
"Ok...After Grandfather got upset about my answer about who would be better walk in heels and Arachne's intervention, she made it into a challenge like in a reality show, after some weeks, she told us about the rules of this challenge...
First, our guild would walk a tour from Kamata to Akihabara in heels, she provided us with her new footwear line, whoever wanted to tap out from the challenge, that person would yell "flat out" and take off the heels, the last one who surrenders or stay with the heels on the feet at the final checkpoint would be the winner.
The first checkpoint was an izakaya close to the train station, and we were wearing boots, I believed I could get free from the challenge because of my prosthetics...but no...I was in the challenge too...we were fine, and nobody "flatted out" from there, but Arachne made us model at the izakaya, Kurogane almost falls with his face to the floor, Amatsumara was looking kinda uncomfortable but he resisted to "flat out".
Then, we took the train to the next checkpoint, and Arachne made us strut at the train, Takemaru reclaimed and fall after the train stopped, and we changed the boots for high-heeled sandals, but before that, Musashi "flatted out" because he was feeling ashamed about wear girly shoes.
The second point was a bar, and when we come, we model again while we were playing some pool and take some drinks, then Tvastar got a little tipsy and was dancing on a pool table and suddenly he jumped out to make a split...but he falls and hurt his balls, he "flatted out" but he said it was fun.
Later, the rest of us took the train to the third checkpoint, a minigolf field...and the footwear we would be wearing...Formal pumps, it got complicated because those shoes were prone to sprain ankles at unexperimented feet, Grandfather was having problems with them but he didn't admit defeat yet, we were playing while Arachne and Catoblepas were making us pose in a photoshoot...then someone came yelling to Takemaru, it was Motosumi and he brought his kids to play minigolf but he reclaimed Takemaru why he was setting a bad example to his kids wearing hooker's heels and pulling him from his ears, Takemaru tried to explain but Motosumi was still upset, he was forced to tap out.
After that, we changed the pumps for platform stilettos (sighs)...then we had a hell time wearing them to the next spot, a maid cafe where he had to sing and dance...it was unsettling for me to have to sing a silly song and dance at public while people was cheering on us, at least we rest a little but Kurogane falls over his face when one of his heels got stuck in a stool while he was standing up, he tapped out.
Finally, we were Grandfather, Talos and I still on the challenge, and the final checkpoint was Akihabara Academy's theater stage, and Arachne and her team made us wear platforms and make a performance...we were tired but Amatsumara was still up on his horse until during our bodybuilding posing performance he missteps and made us fall at stage..."
"And then?"
"We declare it a Draw...Arachne gave us a prize after that and tolds us the challenge's livestream was successful, even she wants to make it again but with another guild..."
"Ok...was nice and all, but what was the prize?"
All this time, Talos was hiding his feet until he shows them wearing a certain footwear
"(Ehem, ehem) you want me to click heels three times to see what happens, Mama?"
Talos was wearing a replica of the Ruby Slippers from "The Wizard of Oz" movie while he crossed his legs, Hephaestus was wearing his replica too but shyly, making a little heel click due to his embarrassment
"G-Grandfather has a pair too if you wanted to know..."
11 notes
·
View notes
Hey heph do you know ahura mazda?you know the superman that like to workout and sun tanning?except he a world rep so yeah......also tell jutaro to go and hide cus hurry he coming here in 30 minutes.I bet he looking for him, forcing him to workout.
"Fuck, I forgot about him..."
Heph orders Talos to hide him at the vault while he handles Ahura Mazda
"May I help you, sir?"
"Oh, Good Day, my good citizen! Do you still have some of your gym protein and energy cookies? I wish to refill my workout supplements..."
"I think we still have some at our warehouse...let me check..."
Hephaestus goes to the warehouse, meanwhile, Ahura Mazda feels something familiar in the air...or more likely...he smells something he recognizes
"I found some of our summer limited edition Tropical Punch flavored protein and Red Berries flavored protein and some boxes of assorted energy cookies...is something wrong, sir?"
"That smelly smell...I recognize that smell no matter where it hides! That only can mean one thing!"
Ahura Mazda points Hephaestus with his staff in a mandatory way
"Are you some kind of villain?! And in that case... WHERE ARE YOU HIDING MY ARCHENEMY AHRIMAN?!!!"
Hephaestus tries to calm him down and convinces him about not know anybody called Ahriman, due to his self-confidence issues and shyness, he force himself to be convincing enough to fool Ahura Mazda and make him go...after that improvised interrogatory, Ahura Mazda chose to go back to Chuo Ward.
Jutaro and Talos comes out from the vault, wanting to see how Hephaestus was after that encounter.
"Heph?...are you ok?"
"That motherfucking Homelander/Ai Hoshino's crackchild!!! How he dares to call Mama a villain?!! Next time I see him...I WILL RENACT A MORTAL KOMBAT'S FATALITY ON THAT ASSHOLE!!!
14 notes
·
View notes