#host: idk i'm just not that into being the murderer haha

[buriedunderdaffodils]

Going to town on some cute needy snuffbait, beating them until their body is bruised all over and then landing hits on the fresh bruises even harder than what caused them in the first place, or slicing and stabbing as their blood stains your hands and clothes and soul, having them weeping beneath you until the tears stop flowing and their body goes limp. And the entire time, with every strike, every slash, every penetration of your blade, you're babbling "Thank you, thank you, thank you, it feels so good, I need this, thank you," on and on like a prayer. You're their god in this moment, deciding exactly when and how they're going to die, but you're the one singing praises to them. You're just so grateful.

I can't decide if it's more fun to imagine the victim being willing and taking some pleasure and pride in knowing their death is serving such a noble purpose, or rather to have them unwilling and thoroughly disturbed by your gratitude. Maybe it just depends on who you're killing that day.

[humming-fly]

bodyswap but it's just the Creatures Within(tm) switching hosts I wonder how that'd go

well I'm stuck at the airport for a while and could use the thought exercise so let's go with it haha

just for consistency let's assume these pairings take place in the host's universe but with the creatures*tm* abilities, ie. greed gets full control of whatever body he works with while john just gets eyes, ling has his motivating factors of being emperor or w/e regardless of pairing while eddie is a washed up reporter in san fran etc.

Ling + Greed: Canonically work incredibly well together, drift compatible idiots, despite having 0 control of his body ling is still able to get his way in the end and had greed doing him favors within 10 minutes of knowing each other, 10/10 compatibility 10/10 functionality

Ling + Venom: hmmm this one's trickier - right away ling is probably extremely agreeable to murder so long as it's who he wants dead/he gets power out of it, so in that regard they'd get along just fine. I think in terms of personality venom is actually extremely easy to work with with very minimal prodding, like he was ready to betray his entire species within like 24 hours so I think ling could get him on board with his power plotting in no time flat and they'd probably have some fun with it. Longer term they might not last too long together since venom is a romantic at heart so ling might need to pass him off to a more suitable partner down the line, but at least in terms of immediate matchups they'd get on well/would probably eat the emperor or something and have a great time doing it. 6/10 compatibility 8/10 functionality

Ling + John: this one's really funny to me john is so fucked lmao - what really works against john here is the fact that ling doesn't really need his eyes to do anything since he can use the dragon's pulse instead and he's also bizarrely mentally stable so it's unlikely his mind would slip enough for john to grab ahold of anything else, so his ability to make himself valuable is pretty dang limited. John's best bet here is convincing ling that working together could result in some sort of power being made available to him down the line, and just have to hope ling decides that's worth his time more than paying for an exorcism. Given ling was willing to search a random country with nothing more than sand and optimism in his pockets those odds aren’t zero though! Beating up cults and making deals with elder gods is very much in ling’s wheelhouse, I’d say normally messing with those things works out poorly for the person investigating them but ling is god’s favorite so he’ll probably be fine. 4/10 compatibility 7/10 functionality

Ling + Rhaast: I mean it’d be fine let’s be real, if rhaast couldn’t corrupt kayn after X years together then ling will be totally fine. Biggest hurdle is I don’t think scythes are ling’s weapon of choice but he could make it work- realistically he’d probably just gift rhaast to the emperor and hope he’d be an impressive enough boon or that rhaast would kill the emperor for him. Idk as much about how the player characters work in lol but assuming kayn’s blue level up thing is canon I assume ling would have that unlocked and rhaast dead in less than three hours. 2/10 compatibility 3-8/10 functionality depending on if sicko mode is canon or not

Eddie + Greed: so in terms of personality I think they’d either get on very well or hate each other with very little in between haha- I lean more towards the former in that Eddie is a somewhat pathetic wash-up and greed is well versed on that kind of personality via making his living in a dive bar. I don’t think they’d be a good reporter though lol. 5/10 compatibility 3/10 functionality

Eddie + Venom: he’s his right hand arm- man. his confidant. his everything. his best friend. his silly rabbit. 10/10 compatibility 7/10 functionality they’re a train wreck that was made for each other

Eddie + John: so this one does have some interesting promise given Eddie is an investigative reporter and also a little insane/prone to impulsive decisions. With that setup I think they actually have the potential to work pretty well together, it would be fun to see how the cookie would crumble over time haha. 8/10 compatibility 8/10 functionality

Eddie + Rhaast: Eddie picks up the scythe and pawns it 0/10 compatibility 0/10 functionality

Arthur + Greed: okay assuming this is memory wipe greed? Might not be too bad, like they might end up in jail but overall surviving the 1930s is feasible for greed and Arthur is probably decent enough company if things are mellow enough. If this is full memory greed? They go into a bar and never leave it again. 6/10 compatibility 3/10 functionality

Arthur + Venom: extremely funny to imagine this one is fun hahaha - I feel like the “lovecraftian horror setting” is just about perfect for venom I genuinely think the cult-busting by night detective by day crime duo has promise - elder gods are all about tentacles and venom can use that to his advantage to assert dominance. 6/10 compatibility 9/10 functionality

Arthur + John: see this one's funny cause this is the canon pairing but their mileage varies so much by virtue of the fact they are the main characters of a choose-your-own-adventure horror podcast, and thus can never really succeed for longer than a few moments lest their entire reality grind to a screeching halt. that said by this point they're mutual lifelines to one another and I respect the codependence. 8/10 compatibility 6/10 functionality (which is pretty high given their medium)

Arthur + Rhaast: exact same as eddie only instead of pawning it probably ends up taking it to some eldrich historian to find out what's up with it. that said arthur Does have a history of immediately going along with voices in his head so he might be the one guy rhaast could actually take over in which case rip arthur lol - regardless pretty unlikely they'd ever stick together longer than an afternoon, 1/10 compatibility 0/10 functionality

not even gonna bother ranking Kayn pairings since I really don't know enough about that guy (really don't know enough about rhaast either but he's funny enough to include lol)

[abysshare]

Yellow again 👋

Sorry if this question is obvious but what's an IRL? And what's the difference between that and Otherkin?

I love finding art of my kintype that depicts what mine was/did specifically too it's always a joy (especially with my seaserpent kintype)That sounds really pretty and it also sounds like a species that might actually exist in show or something. The star also reminds me of Starlight from Rainbow Brite (he's not a unicorn tho)

I love how you're kintypes are like: Siren⚡, Zombie🧟, Hellhound 🐕‍🦺🖤, The Void 🕳️,... and 😸Kitty✨

Never heard of a Harlequin bunny so that's definitely rare. The Void being a kintype is super cool, what's that like? That specific type of Hellhound is definitely unique but I'm not sure how rare they are in general. I'm not angelkin or fallen angelkin so I can't say anything but maybe looking at the angel hierarchy system or what your kintype wanted to accomplish could tell if it was an angel or something else. I think anything that's everywhere that doesn't fit your kintype will seem like too much (also the amount of people who are not even otherkin that use that tag 🤢) I have seen a lot more people use #actually angelic when they're angelkin so you can look at that.

I'd love to talk about my rare kintypes too but this is getting long so I'll probably do it in the next ask 😅 but mine are: Skeletonkin

Red foxkin

Seaserpentkin (kinda, it's more of a sea lindworm)

Daimonkin (helper demon basically)

hi again!!!!

Its okay! I'm not the best at describing things, but best way i can put it is IRLs ( or maybe you have heard them also as Delusional Attatchments / DAs ) is connected to folks with Psychosis / Schizo spec. They ARE that animal/object/character and its hard to seperate them from whatever they ID as.

Like i have an IRL of Vanny from FNAF. I am Vanny, no I'm not a murderer in this life and i do not condone it, but shes apart of me.

The differences ? I am not clear other than one is psychosis/schizophrenia exclusive and one isn't. I'm sure someone has a better explaination!

RIGHT? i love finding art and going "oh hey thats me/familiar". At some point i should try to draw some of my kins once i remember more things about em. Ohh i'll have to look that up 👀

HAHA YEAH. I think that may be a good summary of our personality ( emo emo hater emo... HAPPY FELLOW!!!!!!!!! RAINBOWS!!! ).

sometimes you're the devil, sometimes you're the angel /silly

The Void has heavy ties to our Host, who is a Black Hole Celestial. In general its like.. being cold and dark and mysterious. Kind of lonely. I think it helps us with our constant lonesomeness in real life ( not a vent, just an explaination <3 )

Thank you!! Yeah its crazy :/ I have been trying to look for actual otherkin and therian folks but sometimes they.. aren't that??? They're just ?? Idk what they are doing but its so bad.

sure go ahead!!!

I haven't heard of any of those!!! I think I've heard of fennec and snow foxes?? But not a red fox.

Skeleton kin GOES SO HARD. I'm interested to hear about that as well as Daimonkin.

LETS GO!!! sea serpent rocks!!!

Maybe I'll drop my full list one day.

[queenlua]

update, having conquered the whole magazine:

* i love how, in the Two-Minute Mystery Extended Universe (TMMEU), every single person who dies has (1) a business partner (who hates them), (2) a spouse or ex-spouse (who hates them), and (3) some shitass fuckup child (who hates them). three very convenient suspects, every time. like. there's a little variation on this pattern but not much

* also, i feel like the TMMEU must exist in the same space as the Ace Attorney universe? at least, the legal system in both universes is hilariously arbitrary—anyone who lies about any detail, no matter how minor or irrelevant, is Immediately Assumed To Be The Murderer, and also Circumstantial Evidence Is Always Treated As Ironclad. though, i guess unlike Ace Attorney, these dudes always wind up in fact being 100% guilty, so i guess it's more like this nega-universe Phoenix-Wright's-personal-hell kinda deal. would love to see him try to defend one of these guys lol

* the magazine includes four sections: Beginner, Intermediate, Advanced, and Sleuth. these are fine categories but if i were to make my own magazine i think the categories would be: Super Niche Nerd Shit (the only way to solve the mystery is to know some obscure fact from the author's obsessive pet interest, e.g. i would ABSOLUTELY write a mystery requiring knowledge of some x86 opcode in order to solve it), Just Here For The Drama (look the answer is obvious but don't you just want 500 words of a bunch of tap dancers being sassy at each other), Hipster Bullshit (desperately try to do something weird/offbeat with the form; this is challenge mode because, again, you've got 500 words babey. but isn't it worth it to have a mystery where the answer is "you, the reader, killed them personally"), and uhhhh idk some fourth category. i'm just riffing here. definitely not not scheming a zine or anything

* for some reason the last two pages of the magazine include tips for hosting your own murder mystery party (excellent!), but said guide includes the worst goddamn rum punch recipe i've ever seen in my life. i'm just sayin, Southern Living magazine would never do you dirty like that. next time i am at the grocery store i am going to buy all the women's magazines and do a power ranking of Which Magazines Understand How To Make A Goddamn Cocktail vs Which Magazines Do Not. (...also this explains a lot of my mom's, uh, less-fortunate mixed drink adventures haha. she is not a drinker herself so whenever she's hosting company she is very Oh Fuck I'd Better Look Up How To Do This. eventually she realized she can just call me and now all is well but man was there an incredibly unfortunate bellini incident in the middle there)

anyway 10/10 way to spend an evening or two, would play again

previously on Lua's silly analog game collection: grid-based logic puzzles

THIS WEEK on Lua's silly analog game collection: TWO MINUTE MYSTERIES aw yiss

found this bad boy at the grocery store and they are SO silly and fun... absolutely crushing them so far will report back

[thelegendofclarke]

Do you watch the 100? If so, I hated Pike. They tried to give him some sort of redeeming character arc/backstory, but I wasn't buying it. They expect us to believe he murdered an entire Trikru host and didn't come to his sense of right vs. wrong ONCE?? Fr, I'm glad he's dead. #vengeanceforlincoln... Of course, if you don't watch the 100, everything I just wrote is an unidentifiable mess for you,,, sorry about that...

Haha thank you Anonny I do watch The 100, so this makes perfect sense! I have complicated thoughts/feelings on Pike tbh…

1) I agree that the Trikru army massacre was pretty fucking appalling imo. I will just never be able to see past the fact that Skaikru killed an entire army who was there to help while they were sleeping. I think it was probably the sleeping part that bothered me the most, and the fact that they knew the Trikru army was supposed to be there to help them. Idk, it will never sit right with me, it always makes me incredibly uncomfortable no mater how I try to think about it. I know that some people may consider that too much of a black and white position of ~moral absolutism~ that ignores the intricacies of the situation or something like that. But that’s just where I’m at in my life, as far as massacres go… I am just never going to be a fan. 

2) That being said… I think what the show wanted to do/tried to do/could have done with Pike vs. what they actually did with Pike were two completely different things. I think Pike and his arc suffered from the same big flaws that at I think a lot of s3 did: it was rushed and therefore just really underdeveloped, and the writers expected us to make intuitive leaps with out giving us enough information at all. 

First of all I think the audience was supposed to be waaayyy more upset about Mt. Weather being blown up than it generally was. (JRoth even made that STUPIDLY asinine comment about Mt. Weather being like Skaikru’s 9/11). But the thing is we didn’t KNOW anyone in Mt. Weather except Gina, and even then we had only known Gina for a really short time.

And I think Mt. Weather was supposed to just be yet another thing contributing to Pike and the rest of Farm Station’s feelings on the Grounders, but that backstory was also really rushed. We were given snippets of Farm Station’s interactions with the Grounders (only Azgeda as far as we know) through the story about Monty’s dad being killed trying to save some children from being taken/killed by Grounders themselves. But we just heard it second hand from Monty’s mom and Pike as a story. That would have been SO much more effective if we would have gotten to see it as a flashback or something like that. It was still really sad, but I don’t think that alone was enough for us to really understand the trauma that Farm Station had experienced at the hands of Ice Nation. Another thing that could have REALLY added to that could have been the slave story line from earlier this season. There were just so many elements that could have really emphasized the cruelty Farm Station had experienced from people that they generally just considered “Grounders.” And I also think that distinction of just Grounders vs. the specific clans was another issue that wasn’t fully explored… 

We as an audience also understood that it was Azgeda acting alone, and none of the other clans, that blew up Mt. Weather. BUT, there was really no reason for the people from Farm Station to be able to make that distinction at that point. They hadn’t had any experience with the clan system/the 12 clans like The 100 or even Kane and Abby had. To Pike, to Farm Station, a grounder was a grounder was a grounder; they were ignorant to the differences between the clans and how they could operate both as a whole and as individual groups. And for them, Grounders were dangerous and not to be trusted. But instead of seeing it this way, the show more or less gave us Skaikru massacring an innocent army of Grounders that was there to help them in their sleep.

BUT, even with all this plot and background, at least in my opinion, it would explain PIke’s reaction to the Grounders, but would not excuse his actions toward them. Even if Pike didn’t trust the Grounders, there were people around him who did, people who had more experience with them who he could have listened to. And not only that, Pike knew that Lexa was going to send an army to protect them. 

And also I agree, Lincoln’s death was yet another narrative element that I think solidified disliking Pike for me. But I also think that one of the (not so finely tuned imo) points of Pike’s character was to show how out of place the extreme crime and punishment system from the Ark was on Earth. There was no need for the Ark’s ruthlessness and unforgiving approach to the law. There was no need to execute everyone over 18 who committed crimes anymore. It was uncomfortable for us to watch while they were on the Ark and it became even more uncomfortable once Skaikru was on Earth.

I also think another thing that was going to cause a lot of people to dislike Pike from the outset was the conflict he caused among the delinquents. First and foremost for me was influenced he seemed to be having on Bellamy. It was like 3 seasons worth of character development for Bellamy went totally down the shitter and he reverted right back to his “us vs. them” mentality from season 1. This obviously led to a lot of conflict between him and 4 of the people closest to him- Octavia, Miller, Kane, and Clarke. Not only that but it caused a divide among many of the Delinquents with Miller, Octavia, and Harper on one side and Bellamy, Monty, and Monroe on the other. I think it was really hard for a lot of people (me included tbh) to watch characters who we had seen as a tight, unified group be ideologically and physically divided like that. 

So yeah, I think Pike’s character could have been way more nuanced and understandable than what he ended up being. But, I’m still not entirely sure that it would make me like him more. 

send me your most hated characters/celebrities and i’ll tell you if i hate them too or not