#hopefully ill have better answers soon

[msbigredmachine]

You Again - Flashback

A/N: A snippet of Evelyn and Joe in high school. I'm still completing Part 2 which hopefully should be up soon.

Warning: Themes of bullying

Word Count: 1.1k

READ PART 1 HERE

Escambia High School, October 2000

“Hey Evie!”

She is so startled she collides with her locker door, her books nearly flying out of her hands. It takes a couple of seconds to regain her bearings and realize who is standing in front of her, and it’s not anyone she’s expecting, certainly not the captain of the cheer team.

“Ayesha,” Evie straightens, awkwardly shoving her books back inside her locker and adjusting her skewed glasses. “Umm, did you…did you want something?” she asks, her arms crossed protectively over herself. They’re not friends - Ayesha has never hesitated to remind her of this - so she wonders why she is here, flashing a megawatt smile that one could mistake to be amiable. 

“So…don’t trip,” Ayesha begins, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper, “but I found your note in History class.”

For a second she’s confused, and then it hits her. Oh no. Oh god. She tries to play dumb, fighting the urge to look into her History textbook where she’d thought she’d tucked her little, ill-advised daydream away in one of its pages, safe from the prying eyes of the queen of the mean girls. “W-What? What note?” 

“The note you wrote, silly. I think you dropped it on the floor, you really need to be more careful, girl,” Ayesha giggles.

It’s a lie and they both know it. Evie wouldn’t be so stupid as to expose such damning evidence, let alone discard it haphazardly in class of all places. Her brain is working frantically, trying to figure out how on earth Ayesha got hold of it to begin with. Each student had to present their History paper in front of the entire class, and she suspects Ayesha swiped the note from her desk when it was her turn. It’s not hard to imagine the malicious glee in her eyes as she read the contents, not too different from the one she is trying and failing to hide right this moment:

Dear Joe, Would you like to go to the Fall Ball with me? YES   NO

“Okay,” Evie starts tentatively, treading lightly. “So can I have the note back? Please?”

Ayesha’s eyes widen dramatically. “Oh! I gave it to Joe. I saw his name on it. The note was for him, right?”

Evie feels her heart sink to Titanic depths, her insides heavy from the weight of this shattering news. The magnitude of the trouble she's put herself in brings tears to her eyes but she quickly blinks them away before Ayesha adds it to her ammunition. “Oh…I, uh…it wasn’t for…You’re mistaken, the note was for another Joe-” she starts to backtrack.

“Oh girl, there’s only one Joe in this school who matters and we all know who he is,” Ayesha dismisses flippantly. “Why you so worried anyway? I come bearing good news. He asked me to give you this.” She extends her hand, a piece of paper that looked torn out of a legal pad tucked between her fingers. Eyeing her skeptically, Evie takes it, her anxiety rising as she unfolds it and reads the familiar scribble:

Dear Evie,

Meet me under the bleachers at lunch.

Joe.

Against her better judgment, her heart flutters at his invitation, excitement bubbling inside her just knowing he responded to her. But common sense swoops in, and she stammers, shaking her head, “Look, I don’t…this isn’t necessary at all…Please, let’s just forget that any of this happened-”

“Girl, are you seriously chickening out on Joe Anoa’i?” Ayesha counters. “This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for you and you’re turning it down?”

Evie makes one last throw of the dice, desperate to get out of this predicament. "But why are you doing this? Isn't he your boyfriend?"

"It's...complicated," Ayesha answers easily, placing a hand on Evie's shoulder. “Sweetie, any girl would kill to be in your shoes right now. Who knows, he might say yes. Are you really gonna throw that away because you’re scared?”

Terrified, actually. Not much good comes out of interacting with Joe Anoa’i when you’re not a member of his precious clique. But Ayesha is right. A private meeting with the most popular boy in school is too enticing to pass up, if only this once. So Evie forces herself to wait through the agonizing hour and a half before lunchtime, embroiled in thoughts of how their conversation will go. 

It turns out she should have trusted her gut, because the minute she steps onto the field, something feels off. 

Joe is not here. Outside is eerily quiet save for the muted bustling inside the cafeteria a few feet away. Chalking it up to him standing her up, Evie permits herself to exhale a huge sigh of relief and spins back towards the building, eager to forget all about the mess she almost made.

Then, it happens. Out of the shadows, they step out, seemingly from every corner of the stands. Jon. Josh. Ayesha and her lackeys, Kelli and Chichi. All of them emerging one by one until she is surrounded by his entire posse.

And last but not least, Joe appears like some kind of video game final boss. He steps between the twins, both of whom stare her down with the same demeanor as vultures circling over a carcass. He twirls her letter between his long fingers, his handsome face wearing a sugary sweet smile and a spiteful glint in his eye that strikes terror in Evie.

“So, Evie…I read your little message to me. It was…sweet. Real cute,” he says, coming closer to her, humored by the way she tenses as he towers over her. “I just have one question…” 

He gently trails the corner of the note along her cheek. The gesture would be considered as intimate if his eyes didn't harbor so much malevolence. “Did you really think my answer would be yes?”

The group bursts into laughter, the sounds cruel and taunting. Joe circles around her, regarding her with the same countenance as a piece of gum stuck underneath his Air Max sneakers. “What makes you think I’d ever wanna go to the dance with a nobody like you? Huh?” He throws an arm around Ayesha and kisses her cheek. "Babe, didn't you tell her you were going with me?"

Ayesha crosses her arms and shrugs with fake nonchalance, an even faker smile on her pretty face. "I wanted to...but it was much more fun fuckin' with her head."

She should have known better. Better than to write that shit in the first place. Known that Ayesha was setting her up from the start; known that standing her up or simply ignoring her was too merciful, too tame for Joe and his coven.

It’s beyond humiliating, and all Evie wants is for the ground to swallow her whole.

Ayesha steps up to her, angling her head low enough to catch Evie’s teary-eyed expression. “Awww, are you gonna cry? You gon’ cry bitch? You thirsty-ass pathetic loser?”

Ayesha's arms shoot out, shoving Evie so hard that she falls over, crying out as her knees collide painfully with the ground. Her glasses slip off her face and onto the cold dewy grass and dirt. Her tears splash onto the cracked lenses as they all step past her fallen frame, their cackles echoing in her ears long after they are gone.

--------------------------------------------------

Fun fact: A version of this incident happened to me in high school in real life. Only difference is I wasn't pushed. 😭😭😭

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[ineffablesuffering]

Sick Days (Aziraphale x Crowley x Reader)

I wrote this as a form of comfort as I am finally getting over this cold that I had.

Warnings: like one swear word, Crowley being soft for the reader

Pairing: Aziraphale x Crowley x Platonic!GN! Reader.

Word Count: 1,095

Masterlist

--------------

You lay in bed, the thought of moving was, to simply put it - unbearable. You had awoken with a pounding headache and felt like your sinuses were trying to escape from your face. Everything hurt and your body couldn't decide if it was too hot or too cold. Great. You were sick.

You had meant to have plans with Crowley and Aziraphale feeding the ducks in St James Park and a spot of lunch, but clearly that wasn't happening today. You sat up in bed and instantly the room starting spinning around you. You let out a deep cough and you whine at the feeling in your chest. You put a hand to your forehead to try and ground yourself as you reach for your phone before sliding back down into your bed. You had planned to call Aziraphale and tell him you couldn't make it, but the room kept spinning and forced you to close your eyes to make it stop.

The next thing you remember is your phone ringing a few hours later. "Shit," you mumble. You must have fallen back asleep. You pick up your phone, answer it and put it to your ear. "Hello?" you rasp.

"Y/N, I just wanted to see if we're on your way?" It was Aziraphale. You groan and turn to face your clock. You should have been at the bookshop by now. "My dear? Are you quite alright? You don't sound yourself." He asks.

"I'm sorry Aziraphale, I was meant to call you but I must have fallen back asleep, I'm not feeling too great." You rasp out, your throat feeling like it was on fire. "I'm not going to be able to make it today."

"Is that Y/N?," you hear Crowley shout in the background, "Tell them to hurry up, times a ticking."

You try to let out a laugh, but it ends with you in a coughing fit, wincing at the pain in your chest. "You two go on ahead without me, we'll catch up soon."

"Are you sure? We can always rearrange?"

"Aziraphale, I'll be fine," you say as another cough racks through your body, "I've been ill before."

"Well, make sure you rest and we will see you another time. I hope you feel better soon my dear,"

"Thank you 'Zira, I'll talk to you later," you say as you hang up the phone before placing it on your bedside table. You groan as you drag yourself out of bed, in search of water and hopefully some form of medication.

A short while later, you had decided that you couldn't sit in bed any longer and you were curled up on your sofa, watching your comfort show, eating your comfort food and taking small sips of some hot lemon and honey water when there was a knock at the door. You muted the TV, praying that whoever was knocking would go away. The knocking persisted.

"They're  probably asleep Angel," you heard a muffled Crowley. This got your attention and you made your way from the sofa to the door.

"Maybe, but I'd feel better if I just saw them." replied Aziraphale.

You open the door to find the angel and demon standing before you. They took in your disheveled state, your skin pale except from your blood shot eyes and your nose being red, your hair messy and a headache strip on your forehead, a blanket haphazardly wrapped around your shoulders and your comfy clothes on. A true sight for sore eyes.

"What are you two doing here?" Your voice quiet in an attempt to not irritate your throat even more.

"We came to check on you, and see how you're feeling." Aziraphale said, "We brought you supplies" he gestured to the bag that Crowely was holding.

"You really didn't have to," you say

"We know," said Crowley. You give him a small smile, "and don't think this is me being nice. I'm just following orders."

"I wouldn't dream of it." You say stepping aside inviting them in. Aziraphale smiled at you as he walked in, Crowley sauntered in behind him handing you the bag that he was holding.  You closed the door behind them and peer inside the bag.

"Jesus 'Zira, I have a cold, I'm not opening a bloody chemist." You say to him as he walks towards the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea, taking the dishes you had left on the table with him.

"Well I didn't know what you needed, so I bought everything."

You smile at the gesture, he really was so thoughtful. You make your way back over to the sofa where Crowley had already made himself at home. You roll your eyes, expecting nothing less from him. He gives you a grin.

"Move over," you whine at him as he lounges across the entirety of the sofa.

"Or what," he says playfully.

"I'll cough all over you."

"You wouldn't dare."

"Crowley, be nice." You hear Aziraphale call from the kitchen. He moves rather quickly.

"Bitched," you cough.

"Fuck off," he mumbles, throwing his sunglasses onto your coffee table. You take your place on the sofa next to Crowley, and lean your head on his shoulder. "Comfy?" he says with a smile. You nod against his shoulder as he wraps an arm around you.

"I hate being ill," you complain "everything hurts." Crowley just chuckles, giving you a squeeze. Aziraphale returns with two mugs in his hands. A cup of tea for himself, and a cup of green tea with lemon for you. "Thank you." You rasp as you take the mug off of him.

"Don't be silly," he tells you taking a seat beside you. "Just make sure you drink it while it's hot, it's supposed to help with your throat."

"Aye aye captain," you joke before a coughing fit racks through your body again. You feel Crowley run his hand up and down your back in an attempt to help soothe you. The couple shoot you a sympathetic glance when you're finally able to compose yourself again. "I'm fine, I'll be fine." You say picking up the TV remote and unmuting it. "And because you have crashed my pitty party you have to watch whatever movie I want to watch and I want to watch The Sound of Music." Crowley laughs from beside you as Aziraphale let's out the most unangellike groan. You smile at him, before finding the movie and pressing play. Maybe being ill wasn't so bad when you had your favourite celestials to keep you company.

[medakakurokami]

I finished over 100 visual novels, here’s a long post with some recommendations

Last month I hit 100 Finished VN’s over on the VNDB and I thought I’d shoot out some recommendations while the Steam Summer Sale is going on (even though some of these aren’t going to be on Steam)

I already have finished up some stragglers and caught some shorter titles so it’s up to 104 Finished, but all the better. I have been reading some VN’s since 2015, but it really became a hobby and a genre I was invested in during Covid lockdown in 2020. I had trouble getting into some of the popular titles, but a couple of games that were lesser known at that time really blew me away that year and I started digging more into the medium. I still have a lot to try out and other classics I’m still interested in trying, but here’s a top 10 I’m confident in recommending to most people, at least the kinda people that would follow this blog. A few of these recommendations are actually multi-part series, but hopefully accessible all around.

Planetarian ($10 on Steam and Switch, ~$5 on sale)

This is a very late entry onto this list but I think it’s an easy recommendation. This is a very short 2-4 hour visual novel that got a well received 2 hour movie adaptation in 2016, but it was strong enough that even while knowing the plot everything still hit hard. It is a story set 30 years after an apocalyptic event destroys most of the world, as a human junk-trader comes across a planetarium with a somehow-still-functional robot named Hoshino still performing her daily duties after 30 years without customers or coworkers. It can come across as a bit saccharine, but it is a quick, well made, and effective tearjerker.

Narcissu 1st & 2nd (Free on Steam)

Narcissu’s first two parts are pretty compelling stories to do with suicidal ideation within the scope of the terminally ill. Which is to say they’re also real tear jerkers, and pretty open about some harsh self-reflective emotions. They both have stellar endings, and can be quite immersive despite the very limited artwork (if the screencap looks weird, the game’s art exists within a narrow strip on the screen, with a sentence or two reading out the story underneath it). Maybe the least accessible on this list, but a $0 price tag makes it easier in some sense to get into.

Umineko no Naku Koro ni / When The Seagulls Cry (~$50 on Steam, $30 on sale)

Umineko you’ve probably already heard of, and here’s me recommending it. Umineko comes in two parts, on Steam referred to as the Questions Arc and the Answers Arc. Despite the split, the overall story follows the events of a certain day on Rokkenjima Island in 1986 as a family meets to discuss their inheritance and their family’s mysteries. Unbeknownst to them they are soon haunted, over and over again, by the revenant of the Golden Witch said to live in the woods of their family’s island.

I’m in the minority of preferring the Questions Arc, where well written and deeply human characters find themselves in deeply inhumane and nonsensical scenarios. The Answers Arc back seats some of that to start delving into an esoteric explosion of clues and backstories, and was still very entertaining even if I was more invested in the episodic stories than the overarching mystery. This may also be seen as inaccessible, $30-50 for a slightly older title and over 140 hours long on average playthroughs, but it is deeply absorbing.

Witch on the Holy Night a.k.a. Mahoyo ($40 on PS4 and Switch)

Mahoyo is me and Nasu’s marriage counselor, it really made me see the good in him. It follows a young witch co-habitating with her magic colleague and the puppy-like boy that unwittingly steps into their world at risk to his own life, just as unexplained apparent murders are witnessed in their town.

This could possibly be a higher level recommendation, though it was apparently intended to have sequels and you can somewhat feel that in the isolated feeling of its main conflict. Despite this, the game is definitely worth experiencing for its classy charm and extremely well made action sequences that at times make you forget you’re not watching a full anime film. It’s also a showcase of Nasu’s strengths in writing character interactions and comedy, and he finally lets Show take over and stops Telling you piles of mage society worldbuilding quite so often. It is also has some of the highest quality production value I’ve ever seen, second maybe to...

Marco and the Galaxy Dragon ($20 on Steam/Switch, less than $10 on sale)

Marco and the Galaxy Dragon is an explosive opera of art, energy, color, and of course music. It follows the orphaned Marco and her dragon compatriot Arco as they hunt for treasure across the cosmos, finding their way to Earth on the hunt for Marco’s mother.

If Umineko’s 140 hours seems steep, Marco has you covered with a quick 6 hour rundown of a rebellious orphan fighting back against her space alien menace to find her own sense of place and identity in the universe, along with ALL the friends she made along the way. If Mahoyo feels like an anime film sometimes, Marco actually just has fully animated FMV cutscenes that are fun as hell and have their own unique artstyle to the VN itself. Thousands of pieces of artwork and a 52-track OST fill the game’s short runtime with no cut corners and and overflow of passion from the devs. Honestly even if you don’t want to read it go buy it, it’s cheap and they earned it.

White Album 2 (You’ll have to be creative to find this one)

This is the only recommendation that’s currently only available in an adults only 18+ Rating for the English translation. That being said, it’s one of the few erotic VN’s that felt justified in its pornographic scenes. The story is split into two releases: Opening Chapter and Closing Chapter.

Opening is a short and powerfully delivered love triangle narrative following Haruki, Setsuna, and Touma as their hastily formed 3-man light music band falls into itself with feelings. It’s charming but gut wrenching and sweeps you into its drama very effectively before kicking you on your ass in the end.

Closing Chapter is a long and drawn out disassembling of their lives as they fail to heal from the wounds of the relationships seen in Opening. It, to great effect, takes the readers own experience with how fun and passionate the Opening Chapter was, and shows how trying to cling to halcyon days can make us so dispassionate about our present lives. Painful stuff! Good music, too.

The Princess, The Stray Cat, and Matters of the Heart 1 & 2

a.k.a. Noratoto ($40 on Steam for both, ~$15 for both on sale)

This is a very personal recommendation, and maybe one more easy to make on this blog where many of my followers might be receptive to sincere but slapstick ecchi comedy as art. Every route is highly different however and to me, some are pretty average for galge, while others stand out as amazing. The comedy writing as well feels like it was written by someone with actual comic writing experience, and not just regurgitating the usual ecchi manga jokes.

The general premise of Noratoto is the protagonist Nora, being transformed into a cat by Patricia the princess of the Netherworld, and he must reverse this curse via a kiss before it becomes permanent. A benign fairy tale premise, but one that somehow gives way to underlying stories about existence and finding purpose in families and where that leaves those without families or with abusive or divided families (it is from the same developers as Marco and the Galaxy Dragon, and the themes of finding identity without family match up very closely). Uniquely it is a visual novel written somewhat in 3rd person, narrated by a motherly voice as if the VN was being read to you as a bedtime story.

Like I said, it is dependent on route and some come across as your usual ecchi gal-game schtick, but some stick out, and if every route was as high quality as Nobuchina’s in the 2nd game, it would probably be my favorite visual novel.

The Original Ace Attorney Trilogy ($30 on most platforms, $10 on sale)

You’ve almost certainly heard of Ace Attorney already and have most likely played it. This is me telling any Ace Attorney fans reading that the original trilogy still reigns supreme (regardless of Turnabout Big Top). This is also me telling anyone who has held out on trying Ace Attorney to try it, and to start with the original trilogy.

Obviously this trilogy follows the Meme Man Himself, Phoenix Wright, as he defends the innocent and brings the guilty to justice acting as both lawyer and his own main investigator. While each case presents a unique mystery, the original trilogy has an underlying arc that reaches from beginning to end with a massive conspiracy that Phoenix has to breach to bring justice to the perpetrators and resolve the memory and regrets of his beloved mentor.

These games have some speedbumps as you may be banging your head against the wall trying to find the right evidence, but the experience that breaks through does so with gusto, succeeding on what it sets out to be: games that make you feel like you’ve brought justice to the world.

Utawarerumono Trilogy ($40/60 each on Steam, trilogy bundle $62 on sale)

Utawarerumono was my first proper visual novel, and it set the standards pretty high. I’ve posted about it several times in the last few years, and it remains one of my favorites. It is a labor of love on the part of the developers (the same developers as White Album 2), who developed the latter two games over the course of several years and have made this the spearhead of their company for the time being. Which makes sense, since it is about war.

The first game follows a masked man who is given the name Hakuoro waking up in a rural village with amnesia, confused about the strange population of beast-men living there. Despite not understanding his situation, his ingenuity brings the village prosperity. When the local lords try to put the village under their thumb, Hakuoro and the villagers are able to turn the tides against them. Their village grows into a kingdom as Hakuoro seeks the mysteries of himself and the world around him.

The latter two games pick up some twenty years after the conclusion of the first, and follow a man who is given the name Haku, waking up in the woods with amnesia confused about the... you get it. He is met by Kuon, a young girl on her way traveling to the capital of their nation of Yamato. Haku graciously accepts her help getting out of the cold woods, and decides to join her to the capital. As events play out, Haku finds himself under the direct command of the nation’s leader the Mikado, and carries out missions on his behalf as the nation continues to drag itself into war and conflict and Haku also seeks the truth of his identity.

These games are expansive in scope while still putting a large focus on the day-to-day lives of its characters. Around 100 hours across all three games it is impressive how much story it manages to fit in, but the pacing does bounce around between sweeping conflict and sleepy conversations. It is also in part, a strategy RPG game with the battles in the war being controlled by the player. These are decently made, especially well in the third game, but don’t ask too much of the player and the story remains the main focus and biggest portion of the runtime.

The House In Fata Morgana a.k.a. Fatamoru

($40 complete version on PS4/Switch, ~$40 main game + expansion on Steam)

I’ve gushed about this enough on this tumblr, I’ll keep it brief.

You are a formless soul who is led by the hand of a mysterious maid through the doors of a mansion on an unknown plane of existence. Through each door lies a story of the house in a different era, all following people bound together in ways that leave them cruelly and violently undone by the end of their stories. The connection between these stories, the mystery of the house and the supposed witch that resides within, and the mystery of You the wandering soul all slowly unravel in a bloody show of catharsis and soul. The game is dripping with traumatic poetic text, grating beautiful music, and all of its atmosphere geared toward being oppressive yet enticing. One of the best things I’ve read.

Honorable mentions:

Va-11 Hall-A and Endless Mondays get shout outs as some of the best Original English Language VN’s I’ve read, with cool artstyles and a mature cast they manage to be fun and relatable. Va-11 Hall-A delivers a great arc for its protagonist and Endless Mondays has great dialogue on the threat of automation of creative industries.

Grisaia Trilogy and Hatsumira are both absolutely raucous trilogies that are a lot of fun. Not wholly recommendable to all, Grisaia has some strong moments and a hilarious unique cast but is a mess overall (but we love Michiru). Hatsumira is a bit more consistent, a more stable and fantasy-oriented Grisaia.

A.I. The Somnium Files duology are detective games with highly divisive endings, but great comedy and characters that make them very easy to get through and enjoy the whole way to the end. It’s just a toss-up whether you’ll like that ending.

Sakura Wars games are finally being translated, and they are a great showing for anyone who wants to try some classic dating sim stuff but with some pizazz thrown in with the setting and mecha combat.

The Tears to Tiara duology by the same developers of Utawarerumono and White Album is also one to keep an eye out for. The first game's definitive version isn't available in English and the second game is stuck on the PS3 and no longer available digitally, but if they ever come out on Steam they are worth your time.

Nanairo Reincarnation and Kinkoi: Golden Loveriche are also two solid ecchi comedy galge. Both have surprisingly deep and genuinely heartbreaking underlying mysteries and conclusions.

I still have a lot I wanna read, Planetarian is the only Key novel I’ve read. On the docket are Labyrinth of Galleria, Little Busters, the 9 -nine- series, and Kara no Shoujo and White Album 1 releasing on Steam this year. Some classics I didn’t mention are Fate/Stay Night, Muv Luv, Steins Gate. Muv Luv I read Extra and enjoyed it, but never pulled the trigger on reading the rest, I may at some point on a whim. Steins;Gate I played through half of on PS3 and now my PS3 is in the closet, the VN is really good and has a unique atmosphere to the anime, buuuuuuut knowing the plot has made it hard to want to restart on PC or another console. Steins;Gate is good, if anyone is reading this far and hasn’t seen the anime or read the VN, do it.

[l0serloki]

Bar Fun

Being new around town and meeting Ashe & Cass!

A/N : Im merely a ghost you dont see me posting. But for real, I know it's been a while LOL.. Ive been getting better from my illnesses! Hopefully more writing soon.

masterlist

Ashe :

When Ashe spotted you she immediately didn’t recognize you. She didn’t take kindly to newcomers in her bar spot.

Though you were.. attractive. It wouldn’t hurt for her to get some intel.

You weren’t what she was expecting. And in a good way. She was more than fine with letting you take her seat as long as she continued to learn about you.

“The usual, Martin.” A voice sounded next to you, her red eyes moving to look at you. You had to admit, she was much different than a lot of the other folks in the saloon. A sight for sore eyes compared to the depressed alcoholics gambling away their lives.

“And you are?” She points over and you can feel your eyes widening.

“Y/N. Just arrived here last week.” 

The white haired woman just nods as she grabs the glass that was slid over to her.

“Ashe. Leader of the Deadlock Gang.” She looked over you meticulously, almost like she was seeing through your soul. It was exhilarating and terrifying at the same time.

“A pleasure.” You say quickly. She just nods and takes a sip of her whiskey.

“I’m sure it is. You play any cards?” Her fingers brushed yours for a moment as she set the nice glass down. 

“I can.” You said confidently. Hell you had won against some of the backwoods people filling out the bar in the past few days. She seemed to like your answer as she waved her hand, a few people moving around to set up the table behind you

“Let’s have some fun then, newbie.”

Cassidy :

Cass was shocked to see someone had taken his seat. And such a good looking person at that.

“You know that’s my seat, sweetheart?” With a cocky ass smile and pat to the shoulder.

He will automatically begin chatting up a storm as he buys you both drinks. He makes it painfully obvious he’s interested. After all, where’s the fun in waiting?

“Well isn’t this somethin.. You know that’s my seat sweet thing.” A man moves around your seat at the bar, his hand brushing against your shoulder before sliding in next to you.

“Oh really?” You raised an eyebrow as the cowboy grinned, motioning over the barista. 

“Yeah but it’s alright. I don’t mind you sitting in it. Gives me a nice view. Whatcha want?” He points over to the assortment of alcohol. You give him your order and he barks at the bartender before looking back at you.

“You look much nicer than a lot of folk that come in here. Mind givin me a name? Or maybe somethin more?” He teases out and you have to laugh at his audacity.

“Y/N.” You roll your eyes and he nudges your shoulder.

“Ain’t that a pretty name. I’m sure we’re gonna get along well. Why don’t I show you the pool table? Or maybe even the back part of the saloon?” His hand tests the waters as he moves it across your shoulders. 

“We can do some pool. Then we’ll see about out back.” You couldn’t help the giddy feeling from the attention. Who knew there could be such charming strangers at this rundown bar?

[fairyniceyeah]

💎 I love my team, I love my crew (Part 2/7)

Title from Super (SEVENTEEN)

ILMTILMC Part I

Summary: Seungcheol, Jeonghan and the manager check on the sick members. The group has to decide how to go on as all are at risk of contagion.

CW: emeto, diarrhea in the context of illness

Sickies: Woozi/Jihoon + Joshua + Minghao + S.Coups/Seungcheol

Caretakers: Wonwoo + S.Coups/Seungcheol + Seungkwan + Jeonghan + Jun

💎🍚

Jihoon told himself he would never ever set foot on a boat again. He had told himself the same thing when they had filmed on a boat for the first time and he had gotten really sick in the span of an hour but until now every time they had been on ships the motion-sickness medication had helped. He didn’t understand why it didn’t help now, instead he was feeling worse with every passing second.

His head hurt. His stomach hurt. His whole body hurt. 

And he was still so nauseous. 

The producer had at first not been a fan of company, though he felt bad for snapping at Seungkwan to go earlier, but now he didn’t know what he would do without Wonwoo. Crash, burn and die, all while pathetically laying on a random sailing boat’s bathroom floor, probably.

Instead he had relaxed under Wonwoo’s fingers braiding his disgusting hair back from his face, maybe even a little too much. The older had barely finished braiding before Jihoon had to jerk forward, a spray of sick painting the toilet water brown. He truly hadn’t wanted to see the kimbap from this morning again. 

“It’s okay, Jihoonie”, Wonwoo soothed and pulled Jihoon away from the toilet. The rapper reached up and flushed the sickness away before propping Jihoon up on his lap. It should have been weird but it was cozy instead. Like Jihoon was hugged by a big teddy bear. “Manager-hyung and Cheollie-hyung are coming now. They have meds for you. I’m sure you’ll feel better soon.”

Jihoon sighed and nodded. He truly looked forward to medication that hopefully helped even if he wasn’t sure if he could actually keep it down. The nausea was unrelenting and he could feel his stomach rebel under the tight grip he had on it.

“Sorry for ruining your afternoon”, he whispered. He was glad to have Wonwoo, yes, but he also felt bad for him. Wonwoo surely hadn’t planned to spend the afternoon sitting in a tiny bathroom watching over his seasick, pukey dongsaeng. 

“Nonsense”, Wonwoo said firmly, “don’t worry about it. I’m happy to help. We all know you get seasick and though it sucks, it just happens sometimes.”

Jihoon was saved from having to think of an answer by footsteps and then a knock on the partly open door.

“Hyungs”, Wonwoo called, “come in or well…”

There really wasn’t any room for Seungcheol and the manager - both tall and broad - to come in. Instead they stayed in the open doorway, looking down at them. Wonwoo scooted a bit, still holding Jihoon on his lap, so they all could look at each other.

“Hey, Jihoon-ah”, Seungcheol greeted with a hoarse voice. Even the leader seemed a bit confused by his voice quality but after he gave a short cough, it cleared. “How are you feeling now?”

“Nauseous, hyung”, Jihoon mumbled, “I just threw up again. My head hurts too, and my stomach. I hate boats.” He shivered and felt Wonwoo hold him tighter.

“We don’t think it’s seasickness, Jihoonie”, the manager remarked, “Minghao-yah isn’t feeling good too. And Jeonghan is fine and he took the same meds as you - that doesn’t really mean anything but still … it’s more likely that you are really sick. Food poisoning is out of the question considering you all ate the same thing.”

Great. Just great. Nothing better than a stomach flu in these tight quarters. Jihoon already dreaded the coming hours.

“Shit”, Wonwoo spoke aloud what Jihoon thought. 

“Yeah. But don’t worry about it, Jihoonie”, the manager said and crouched down to look at Jihoon, brushing back a strand of hair. “I have some pills for nausea and vomiting here that we can try. Do you think you could take one?”

He held out a bottle of pills.

Jihoon took a deep breath in and tried to decide. His stomach was unsettled, so much was true, but he also didn’t feel like he needed to be sick in the next few minutes again. So he nodded, hoping the pills would bring some relief.

The manager handed him a pill while Seungcheol balanced past them to fill Jihoon’s toothbrush cup with water. Wonwoo helped Jihoon lift the cup to his mouth, his shaking hands not able to properly grasp and hold it. The cold water felt uncomfortable in his queasy stomach and suddenly Jihoon doubted his ability to take the pill after all. Saliva filled his mouth, making him feel like he was about to gag again.

But he was already inconveniencing his hyungs enough. Surely he would manage to swallow one teensy tiny pill. 

Jihoon was wrong. He was so wrong. The moment he took the pill into his mouth, he realized that with how tight his throat was he couldn’t swallow. Within a few seconds the pill had started to dissolve and before Jihoon was even able to comprehend what was about to happen, the vile taste made him gag. 

The water, white and chalky from the pill, spilled from his mouth before he could stop it, drenching his shirt. But then Jihoon couldn’t stop. He retched again, feeling his stomach reject everything, and more vomit came up, falling onto his lap. 

Wonwoo exclaimed in surprise but quickly helped Jihoon lean over the toilet where he proceeded to gag and retch. Torrents of throw up dirtied the water and the porcelain while Jihoon started to fight for breath. His stomach hurt, cramping badly and pushing even more sick up. 

It took a few moments before Jihoon was able to stop gagging even after he hadn’t thrown up in a bit. He kept leaning over the bowel, not sure if he wasn’t about to spew again.

“Deep breath, Jihoon-ah”, Wonwoo said, gently patting his back. With his other hand he used a wad of toilet paper to wipe Jihoon's mouth. A dangerous task, if Jihoon was honest. He couldn’t guarantee that he would be able to warn Wonwoo in time but it also felt good to have the sick away from the corner of his cracked lips.

But it was useless, as much as dangerous. Jihoon felt his stomach contract and this time the force of his angered stomach was so much that vomit rushed out through his mouth and nose. It was a horrible feeling, burning his esophagus, throat and nose and it took Jihoon’s breath away. His vision went a bit black before his stomach calmed down and gave him mercy. 

Exhausted from the ordeal and too tired to feel humiliated, Jihoon just sunk back against Wonwoo’s chest. He couldn’t hold himself up anymore, even if he wanted to.

The manager sadly smiled at him, looking truly empathetic to Jihoon’s plight. “Let us take your …”

“Cheollie-hyung”, Seungkwan called, barreling into the bedroom out of the blue. Ashamed, Jihoon bowed his head. He didn’t want the younger to see his vocal leader this way. “Thank God I saw you from the hallway. Shua-hyung isn’t doing well either.” He stopped for a moment to take in the scene. “How is Woozi-hyung?”

“I’m okay”, Jihoon replied before any of the others had a chance. It was getting too crowded. Having three people stare down at him laying miserably on his taller chingu, covered in his own sick, was overwhelming and humiliating. Luckily Wonwoo seemed to get the memo.

“Go check on Shua-hyung, Cheol-hyung, manager-hyung”, the rapper said and tightened his arms around Jihoon even more for a moment, “I’ve got Jihoonie.”

💎🦌

The headache Joshua had been nursing since lunch had taken on a worse level. It didn’t quite seem to be a migraine, despite the awful pain. He ticked all the boxes for an early level migraine but somehow he didn’t think it was one. Yet the pain was bad enough that he wanted to cry or smash his head against the wall. Knowing that would scare Seungkwan - if he hadn’t left while Joshua had been asleep - who had no idea how bad headaches could get and to some extent aware that it would not solve his issue, he refrained from it. 

He’d only been awake for a minute or two but Joshua was ready to fall back asleep again. 

He took a deep breath, trying to speak and find out if he was alone or not. Opening his eyes was out of the question. But even speaking seemed to have been the wrong thing to do. Suddenly nausea was rolling in his stomach. 

Oh no. He didn’t know if he could take vomiting on top of everything. He was sure his head would split open if that happened. Still, he couldn’t ignore the bitter taste in his mouth.

“Kwan-ah?”, he whispered without opening his eyes. There was a bit of a scuffle and it sounded like something was dropped. Somebody was there. Joshua felt relief was over him, even if the sound aggravated the pain. 

“Shua-hyung?”, the younger vocalist replied quietly, “what do you need?”

“Can you get me a bin or a bag or something?”, Joshua mumbled, “I don’t think I can make it to the bathroom.” Getting up would definitely make him sick, he was sure.

“Are you gonna throw up?”, Seungkwan asked, his voice a bit more frantic now. 

“Maybe”, Joshua admitted, “can you…?”

His stomach rolled again and he felt himself break into a cold sweat. 

“I’ll be right back”, Seungkwan said before the door opened and closed quietly. The sudden silence was deafening and in the absence of anything that could distract him he was now very aware of the ship’s slight up and down movements. 

Joshua wasn’t sure if he had fallen asleep again or if Seungkwan was so quick but the door opened quite soon. It sounded like there were more footsteps now. Who had Seungkwan brought? The vocalist hoped for one of his fellow 95-liners. Seungcheol had a lot of experience caring for Joshua’s and Woozi’s migraines and Jeonghan was his best friend and his safe place. 

The bed dipped as somebody sat down beside him, causing the nausea to surge. Joshua resolutely clamped his jaw shut, breathing deeply through his nose and trying to concentrate on anything but the nausea.

“He’s gonna vomit”, a quiet voice said. Seungcheol. It sounded further away and there was a weird quality to the leader’s voice. Why was Seungcheol so far away? Who was sitting beside him? Jeonghan? He hoped it was him but he couldn’t tell for sure.

Then the words registered in Joshua’s sluggish mind. He wasn’t gonna throw up, how would Seungcheol…?

Joshua gagged, tasting bile at the back of his throat. The mysterious someone lifted Joshua up into an elevated position and it was enough for the nausea to boil over.

Hot sick sprayed past his lips and Joshua whimpered. It was disgusting. Even worse, the sound of his vomit hitting a crinkling plastic bag seemed to stab at his brain, making everything too loud and intense. Bile burned his nose and he threw up again.

“It’s okay, Shua-yah, we got you”, the head manager said. So it was him who was holding Joshua up. If he wasn’t so focused on how awful he was feeling he would have been embarrassed. At least Jeonghan had seen him like this before. 

“I’ll go and get him something to drink”, Seungcheol announced and his hurried footsteps receded. For a moment Joshua wondered why the leader was abandoning him now but as he retched again and his brain felt like it would explode with the next sound, he couldn’t care less.

He whimpered again, not able to stop the helpless sound. “Make it stop”, he begged, despite knowing there was nothing the manager or Seungkwan - Joshua supposed it was him holding the bag - could do. He was so desperate for relief that any rational thought was wiped from his mind.

“I’m sorry, Shua-yah”, the manager said, rubbing his back. “Try to calm down, okay?”

Joshua wanted to tell him that he could not - under any circumstances - calm down. He was so hot. He was shivering. His stomach was turning itself inside out. His dongsaeng was holding the bag he was puking in. Worst of all, his head was in so much pain that even thinking was hard.

But he couldn’t. He just gagged again, the stench of his previous meals reappearing making the nausea worse. 

It seemed like Seungkwan understood. The bag was pulled away from his face and suddenly Joshua could breathe.

“What are you doing?”, the manager asked, confused and panicked, “what if he …?”

“The smell is making me nauseous. Imagine how Shua-hyung feels”, Seungkwan - so it was really him - replied quietly. “If he throws up, he throws up. But I think this will help more.”

It really did help to not have the bag in front of his face, even if he didn’t even see the contents. Joshua gagged dryly a few times but then his stomach calmed down. He sighed in relief. A tiny part of him had started to believe he would forever be trapped in a circle of vomiting making his headache worse and his headache triggering more vomit. 

The manager, seemingly satisfied and hopeful that Joshua was done, lowered the vocalist back onto the bed. “What can we do for you?”, he asked.

Joshua desperately wanted to remove the taste of throw up from his mouth but he didn’t think that drinking or even swishing his mouth out would happen without him vomiting again. Nevermind the movement needed for that. Taking medicine was out of the question as well. Just the thought of his anti-emetic and the migraine medicine wanted him to start gagging. 

“Ice pack?”, he slurred, sudden exhaustion hitting him.  

“I’ll go look for one”, Seungkwan said.

“Good call. You’re running a fever, I think”, the manager whispered, “I think you have what Jihoon and Minghao have.”

Joshua didn’t even have it in him to ask what was going on with his dongsaengs. Sleep pulled him under.

💎🐸

Minghao didn’t remember a time where he had felt this terrible. His mom had once told him that  he had had a terrible stomach flu as a baby but he obviously didn’t remember it. Even when he had eaten the spicy curry Jun had made some years ago - and then never again - he hadn’t felt like this. It was as if his insides were boiling, reduced to watery, sick liquid.

As his stomach cramped anew, he couldn’t help but whimper and curl over into himself. Tears burned in his eyes and he didn’t have the strength to hold them back. They trailed down his cheeks, dripping onto his lap. 

He felt so humiliated. The ship was small, barely fitting the members and the staff. In fact, Hoshi didn’t even have a bed but only an inflatable mattress on the floor of the bedroom he shared with Seungcheol, Jun, Jeonghan and Vernon. All of the staff would sleep on air mattresses on the floor of the living room, a small section would be separated by a curtain for the four women on staff. 

And here he was. He was acutely aware that his stomach wasn’t throwing a quiet fit. Anybody passing by would know what exactly he was enduring. To add to his misery, the combination of upset stomach and the smell quickly made him queasy. 

A gag made his throat jump. Oh no. There was no trash can in the bathroom. It only held the toilet he was getting very familiar with and a tiny sink. He couldn’t throw up in this bathroom, not now. It was bad enough that he had been forced to admit to Vernon about his bowel issues, he couldn’t throw up on the floor on top of that. Speaking of the youngest rapper, Minghao really hoped he hadn’t followed him after he had been forced to flee the living area. 

Fate was against him. Just as he heard a knock on the door and Vernon’s concerned voice asking if he should go and get a hyung, Minghao’s throat spasmed. He retched. 

Minghao didn’t have any time to prepare himself before a cascade of vomit made its way out of his mouth, splattering onto the floor between his feet. At least he had been already bent over so he didn’t hit his lap. More liquid, chunky and hot, spilled from his lips and this time the backsplash dirtied his lower legs. An instinct reaction of disgust made him sick again. 

Helpless tears sprung to his eyes and Minghao couldn’t help but sob between expulsions from both ends. Everything hurt and his stomach was so sore and unsettled. He wanted a hyung. But he also didn’t want to be seen this way. 

A knock on the door made him jump and another wave of vomit rushed up his throat to join the rapidly growing puddle. For a moment Minghao wondered what would happen if he continued throwing up like this, already most of the floor was covered. Would the puddle just continue growing until it ran out of space and pushed its way out into the hallway like a broken water pipe? Minghao certainly felt like a leaky water pipe, his body desperate to get rid of all fluids. 

“Eissa, it’s Jeonghan-hyung and Junnie. Vernonie fetched us”, his second oldest hyung said through the door. “Are you okay? Can we help you somehow?”

“No”, Minghao gasped out, “just … wait…”

“Okay, we’ll just be outside, baby”, Jun called. 

Embarrassment crept up on Minghao as he realized they wouldn’t budge. They would get first row seats to the sounds of his body rebelling. 

In a stroke of luck it seemed like his body was done with him soon after. He cleaned himself up, flushing a few times, and tried to wipe the sick from his legs without stepping into the puddle. It didn’t really work as his stomach cramped badly as he tried to bend down. So quickly he was forced to admit defeat.

He didn’t really know what to do. He knew that he’d likely be in this position again sometime soon. And he desperately wanted comfort. In the end the need for comfort and his inability to properly clean up forced him to call out for his hyungs sooner rather than later. He was just glad that he had been wearing shorts and therefore had been able to pull them up over the sickness on his legs. At least he was spared the indignity of being naked after all that.

“Gege? Hyung?”, he called out cautiously.

“We’re here, Xiao Ba”, Jun replied instantly. “It’s just us. Can you open the door for us?”

Minghao didn’t reply, just unlocked the door. However, he couldn’t bring himself to open the door. It only took a few seconds until he was facing the two older members. Tears sprung to Minghao’s eyes again and he looked down at their feet, ignoring the mess on the floor.

“Oh, baby”, Jeonghan cooed, managing to sound shocked at the same time. 

“I’m sorry”, Minghao whispered without lifting his head. He didn’t want his hyungs - or worse a staff member he would never be able to look into the eyes after - to clean up after him, but he knew he couldn’t do it. 

“It’s okay, Xiao Ba, come over here”, Jun said and held out his hand. Tentatively Minghao grabbed his hand and stepped over the mess to immediately be pulled into the older dancer’s arms. 

“It’s okay”, Jun repeated as Minghao kept sobbing into his shoulder, “I just wish you’d told me earlier you didn’t feel well.”

“It’s embarrassing. It only started when we played table tennis anyway”, Minghao mumbled. He was starting to feel really lightheaded and wobbly, even with Jun holding him. “I don’t feel good.”

“Don’t be embarrassed”, Jeonghan said from behind him and rubbed his back, “you’re just really sick. It happens.”

Minghao removed himself a tiny bit from Jun’s arms so he could look at Jeonghan. The older gave with a sweet, comforting smile and Minghao noticed that he had closed the bathroom door so that anybody who would stumble upon them would not immediately see. Minghao was deeply grateful for that.

“Do you feel ready to go lie down in the living room?”, Jeonghan asked. 

“Please”, Minghao mumbled. All he wanted was to lie down. The walk to the living area wasn’t long at all but at the moment it felt like they were asking him to hike the length of the Great Wall of China. 

His head was swimming and then his knees really buckled. Jun tightened his grip on him as soon as he felt Minghao sway, which was the only thing keeping him from face planting on the floor. 

“I got you, Xiao Ba”, Jun whispered, “Hannie-hyung, could you…?”

Within a few seconds Minghao found himself supported on both sides by his hyungs, his arms wrapped around their shoulders. His legs were like jelly and he was more dragged than he actually took steps. The little strength it took to keep his head up made everything woozy again so he just let it thunk against Jun’s shoulder and closed his eyes. The last thing he felt was being laid down on a soft cushion and a cool cloth wiping his legs before he fell asleep. 

💎🦖

From Jeonghannie-hyung (17:48): Everybody who is able to, please come to the living room as soon as possible. It’s important. 

“Well, that’s ominous”, Hoshi commented after Vernon read out the message out loud. Dino and the other maknae had done as asked from Jeonghan - they had joined Mingyu, Seokmin and Hoshi in the lounge area on the deck. They hadn’t found Joshua to tell him about the arising situation but they apparently had been able to keep appearances up enough for the three elders not to ask if anything was wrong. 

“Let’s just go”, Vernon said and rolled his eyes at Mingyu and Seokmin, who were still discussing the table tennis match - which they had done since the two maknaes had arrived. Even Hoshi looked like he wanted to strangle the two which was really a feat. The older was so easily drawn into shenanigans that it was truly a wonder he wasn’t involved.

“Do you think it has something to do with Woozi-hyung and Minghao-hyung?”, Dino whispered to Vernon as they walked side by side. The rapper just shrugged. 

When they entered the living room, they found a variety of staff members, as well as Jeonghan and Seungcheol gathered around a table. Jun sat at another table. Dino quickly realized why, when he saw Minghao asleep on the older’s lap. The dancer was curled into himself and looked pale and sweaty. Jun had his hand on Minghao’s stomach, rubbing soothing circles. 

The atmosphere was undeniably tense.

“Is he okay?”, Hoshi asked, eyeing the duo wearily. The dance leader wasn’t a fan of sickness, as far as Dino knew. He’d rather avoid it because he doesn’t know what to do - except for with Woozi, obviously. Mingyu didn't look any more happy.

Jeonghan sighed and pointed at the five empty chairs at their table. “Please sit. Now, that we are all here…”

He was interrupted by Seokmin. “What do you mean that we’re all here? Shua-hyung, Wonwoo-hyung, Woozi-hyung and Kwan-ah are missing?”

“That’s what we’re here to talk about”, the head manager remarked, “Minghao-yah is sick. So are Woozi-yah and Joshua-yah.”

“Oh damn”, Mingyu cursed. 

“Yeah”, Jeonghan sighed, “Kwan-ah volunteered to keep an eye on Shua and Wonwoo just texted that he doesn’t think he should leave Jihoonie alone to come here.”

“It’s that bad?”, Hoshi asked nervously, seemingly very concerned for his best friend. Dino understood. He too hadn’t thought it was that bad. Beside him Vernon was starting to fidget as well.

“I haven’t yet looked them all over”, the medic replied, “but we all doubt it’s food poisoning. I think it’s a stomach flu, a very contagious one at that. Norovirus, likely.”

Dino felt his heart drop to his stomach. With three members already sick and a very contagious virus going around they all were likely doomed. A ticking clock was counting down on them. It would be awful on the boat, far away from help and in such close quarters.

Another manager seemed to think along the same lines as the maknae. “Filming is canceled obviously, we can do that another time. The priority at the moment is to keep this from spreading, I think. Can we quarantine the sick members to a room and hope that the rest of us are not yet infected? It might keep the sickness from spreading.”

“No, that’s not possible. I don’t think so, at least. No matter that Woozi hasn’t been able to leave the bathroom, no matter that Joshua is in so much pain he basically passed out, no matter that Minghao is really weak, no matter that none of them could climb up to an upper bunk”, Jeonghan started, “Woozi has been throwing up every twenty minutes, Joshua is really sensitive to sound and light and also throwing up, and Minghao is getting sick from both ends. There is no way they wouldn’t set each other off and sharing a bathroom with two other sick members will be a disaster waiting to happen. I’m afraid we all might need to bite the bullet and distribute sick members to every room, so we can watch over them.”

“I agree with Jeonghan-ah”, the head manager said.

Jun nodded as well. “I don’t know about the other two but Minghao needs help. He can barely walk and he’s really dehydrated, he fell asleep before he could drink anything. I doubt he would have kept it down but … they can’t be on their own…” He trailed off, looking lost in thought and so worried about his younger fellow chinese member.  

“What do we do then?”, Dino asked, feeling overwhelmed with the situation but also like he needed to help.

Jeonghan sighed, resting his head in his hand for a moment and taking a deep breath before suggesting: “I think the best would be if we divide into groups to take care of the sick members, as well as one where we only put those we hope didn’t get infected yet go together, and try to avoid each other for the time, so that maybe contagion is a bit reduced.”

Jun nodded, as did the head manager and the medic.

“Wonwoo is with Woozi, Kwan-ah is with Shua and Jun is with Minghao”, Jeonghan decided the obvious, “I think we should add another member and one manager to each team. Vernon, Cheollie and I have definitely been in contact with the sick members, and the rest of you maybe try to stay far far away. Cheollie, what do you think?”

Dino had nearly forgotten that the leader was there, he had been so quiet. It was unusual for Seungcheol to be quiet in a situation like this, the maknae mused, normally their leader was the first one by a sick member's side and decided on how things would progress. But during the whole exchange he had been silent, head bowed and staring at the table in front of him.

Now that all the attention was on him, Seungcheol lifted his head. 

“I …”, Seungcheol started but then he stopped and pushed his chair away so violently it toppled over. 

Dino only had a few seconds to note how awfully pale their oldest was and remember the heart-stopping moment of Seungcheol falling into the water after complaining of the cold on a hot day. Then Seungcheol turned his back to the group and doubled over, throwing up onto the floor with a loud gag. 

“Shit”, Jeonghan cursed and pushed his own chair away to stand and support the leader as he continued getting sick. 

Dino watched in horror, not having expected it even though in retrospect it had been clear that something was up with their mat-hyung. Vernon had seemingly expected it even less and out of instinct clutched Dino’s hand with his own tightly.

“This is not good”, the rapper whispered.

💎🍒

Seungcheol didn’t know when he first started feeling unwell.

When he first noticed it, it was like he had always felt like that. Nauseous, stomach cramping and freezing cold. Not necessarily the best conditions for swimming in the open sea. Staying close to the floatie and getting out before his strength completely vanished had been the only thing on his mind at that time. Falling into the icy cold water had not been his plan, a wave of nausea so suddenly washing over him that he feared he would throw up then and there on the ladder. Instead he had fallen into the water. 

The leader had no idea how he had made it up to the deck without vomiting all the salt water he had accidentally swallowed up. Hell, he was feeling so bad he had all but confessed to Jeonghan, Dino and the manager that he wasn’t feeling well. Only Vernon running to tell them Minghao was sick had stopped him from telling them we thought something else next to falling was wrong. 

While the others had seemingly forgotten about the leader’s admission - don’t get him wrong, he was glad they were focusing on the younger members instead of him -  he himself could not forget about how awful he was feeling. 

If watching Woozi vomit all over himself had not been enough, watching Joshua throw up barely ten minutes later had not done the leader any favors. At least the members had been so focused on the sick ones that they had not even suspected that Seungcheol was feeling about ready to redecorate the floor himself. Getting Joshua water had been as much of a necessity as a saving grace. Seungcheol was sure if he had stayed any longer he would have gotten sick listening to Joshua retch. And if he took a detour to just stand in a corner and take deep breaths until his own shaking had subsided, nobody seemed to care. Least of all Seungkwan who told him that Joshua was asleep and to leave the water at his bedside when Seungcheol turned up with it, much later than the time he would have needed to get to the living room and back. 

None of them had suspected a thing. A win in Seungcheol’s book. 

He knew that as general leader and mat-hyung he was expected to say things and give suggestions, work on solutions, at the meeting Jeonghan and the main manager had quickly organized. Yet with a GI infection epidemic looming over their heads no one even spared a thought to the fact that he didn’t speak. 

Seungcheol was proud of the members for staying level-headed even in face of this - a situation none of them had ever faced before. 

“Cheollie, what do you think?”, a voice asked through the fog in his mind. Shit, they wanted his opinion after all. Just … Seungcheol had no idea what they even were talking about. 

Along with the stomach ache, he must have developed a fever. That would explain his muddled thoughts. It was only then that it occurred to Seungcheol that he likely had what was already making Joshua, Jihoon and Minghao so sick. He needed to let them know, needed to let them know they had to keep their distance from him.

He lifted his dizzy head, seeing everything swirl around him. This was not good. His stomach twinged, unhappy with the nauseating movement.

“I …”, he started, feeling like his tongue was too big for his mouth. He didn’t even have a chance to process what happened. One second he was speaking, the next he had pushed back his chair and a puddle of sick was rapidly growing at his feet. 

Seungcheol gagged harshly, feeling his whole body shudder with it and swaying with the motion. A new torrent of vomit rushed up his throat, splattering at his feet. His knees went weak and he would have fallen if not for the hands holding him up.

“Shit”, the person holding him cursed. Hannie? Seungcheol wasn’t sure.

Later he couldn’t say for how long he had been throwing up. Afterwards he just knew he felt wrung dry, his insides twisting and everything swirling around him. 

“Let’s get you to the bathroom across the hall, hm?”, the voice said and it was then that Seungcheol realized it really was Jeonghan who was holding him tightly. 

But then.

“Hannie-hyung”, Jun called, his voice frantic, “I need to get Hao there.”

Seungcheol suddenly felt sick again. Guilt was crashing over him like a wave. First his sickness had interrupted the meeting about the sickness and now he had - even if accidentally - set Minghao off again. Minghao, who as far as Seungcheol knew, couldn’t afford to lose more liquids.

With a sob, more sick spilled from his lips and onto the ground.

“Cheollie”, Jeonghan whispered, gently rubbing Seungcheol’s back in comforting circles. After this surge of sickness passed, Seungcheol was pushed down on a chair. He hung his head low, nearly resting it on his knees. 

“Hey, can you look at me?”, Jeonghan asked, his tone so gentle and worried that Seungcheol couldn’t help but lift his head to do as asked. He didn’t even remember closing his eyes but when he opened them he was greeted by Jeonghan giving him a lopsided smile, the one he used when he tried to cheer members up but also was very worried himself. The vocalist was squatting in front of the chair Seungcheol was sitting on, balancing with one hand on Seungcheol’s knee. The touch was so comforting. 

“Hannie”, the leader rasped.

“I’m here”, his best friend reassured, “wish you’d told me you felt this sick earlier though. I know you mentioned after swimming but you let us brush it aside. Next time, make us listen.”

“Sorry.”

Jeonghan sighed and lifted his free hand up to first brush Seungcheol’s hair from his forehead, then hold the back of his hand against it. After a few seconds trailed his hand down to cup Seungcheol’s cheek.

“You’re burning up, darling.”

Seungcheol nodded. Even with his mind hazy as it was he knew what that likely meant.

Suddenly somebody crouched down beside Jeonghan. It was the medic on staff if Seungcheol could remember correctly. He placed a plastic bag into the leader’s lap.

“Just in case”, he commented. “Can I look you over, Seungcheol-ssi? You seem to be burning up and obviously have what the others have.”

Seungcheol nodded, exhaustion pulling at his every bone. He just wanted to sleep.

Five minutes later the medic had established that the leader was running a sky-high temperature of 39.4°C and Seungcheol had been forced to bring the precautionary plastic bag to his lips, the thermometer having triggered his gag reflex to an uncomfortable degree. He hadn’t yet thrown up again but he also was pretty sure it was only a matter of time. 

The managers had vacated the room, moving the meeting to the outside in hopes to discuss future plans and try to figure out how to get back to land - at least that’s what Seungcheol managed to understand while fighting to not spit out the thermometer along with his stomach.

“Hyungs?”, Dino’s voice suddenly came from the entrance door to the living room. He and Mingyu were both standing there, kind of awkwardly. Seungcheol had completely forgotten about them if he was being honest.

“Hey, Dino-yah, Mingyu-yah”, Jeonghan said, “what’s up?”

“How is Cheollie-hyung?”, Mingyu questioned, biting his lip and seemingly trying to avoid looking at his sick leader. If anything, Seungcheol understood. He arguably was feeling even more awkward than his dongsaeng.

“Queasy but alive”, Jeonghan quipped, likely trying to make the atmosphere more light. “What can I do for you?”

“We just wanted to let you know that Hoshi-hyung went to help Wonwoo-hyung with Woozi-hyung and Seokmin-hyung went to check on Joshua-hyung and Seungkwan-hyung. Vernon-hyung went after Jun-hyung and Minghao-hyung. That leaves us with Cheollie-hyung if that is okay? We thought you might like to check on all the sick members periodically, Hannie-hyung?”, Dino said hesitantly. 

It was not a bad idea. Jeonghan seemed to agree. 

ILMTILMC Part III

Masterlist links: Fairy's Full Masterlist Fairy's Masterlist - SEVENTEEN

[imagine-knowing-a-name]

The End of the Line

Summary: Out of all your missions, successful or not, none have managed to kill you yet. But you don't realise that even surviving them comes at a cost to your health, even if Jeff vows to make it better.

Word Count: 2261 Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Reader Warnings: not proof read, illness, death, and a very sad Jeff (angst) A/N: THIS IS NOT CANON TO THE JFU BY THE WAY. THIS IS NON-CANON!! it's not the best thing I've written and I lost motivation to write the middle section of this in full depth, so hopefully it all still makes sense. Hope you enjoy! :) (it's not canon!!)

"You should have gone to the doctor; I told you not to cancel it!"

"We had a mission, Nat. People needed saving. That's our job."

"You need saving.” Natasha sighs, her head in her hands, before she looks up at you. Pleading. “How far along is it?”

"It's one of the most common types; people survive it every day-"

"Y/N. How far along is it?"

Outside your bedroom, Jeff inches closer, sensing his parents' distress. He doesn’t like it when you argue, and he especially doesn’t like how upset Natasha seems to be. "It's too far for radiotherapy." He hears you mutter, your already low voice muffled further by the door. The suspense of knowing only half the story becomes too much for Jeff and he soon bursts into the room.

He sees you and Natasha sitting side by side on the bed: you with your hands in your lap, watching your own fingers fidget, while Natasha watches you, her bloodshot eyes scanning your face as if it’s the last time she can.

Determining who needs comfort most, Jeff trots towards Natasha and repeatedly butts at her legs, attempting to ease her worries. He may not be sure why she’s crying, but he knows he can make it better; he always makes things better. 

It seems to work when the assassin smiles at him through watery eyes, even picking him up and settling him on her lap. Jeff smiles back, proud to be of service, and happily purrs when Natasha strokes his head. She pets him quickly, to begin with, then slows until her hands stop right above Jeff’s earholes. Jeff continues to smile at her, hoping soon she will remember to keep stroking him and restore his hearing.

"Can you hear me, Jeff?" Natasha whispers. The land shark doesn’t reply but instead stares forward with a wide grin and lolled tongue, not giving any visible clues that he’d even noticed her speak. “Good.”

Natasha turns to you again, her expression graver now that Jeff can’t overhear. “I want you to be honest with me, Y/N, please, without tangents or deflections: what is the survival rate?”

That was the question you had been expecting and dreading since you first got your diagnosis; the answer is easy to find, and you know you can’t keep the truth from Natasha, but a small part of you wishes she would leave it be, that she hadn’t asked the question.

You wish that she never had to know.

But you can't always have that wish; this is happening, and you have to think about her, your wife. It's better for her to hear it from you.

"On average... 1 in 10."

A sharp inhale from Natasha; she is trying her best to keep it together, nodding for your sake. "And for you... Are you on the average?" You hear her voice shake but don't comment on it.

"They found it late. The odds are slimmer."

There is a long pause, and then Natasha breaks, a racking sob emerging as you wrap your arms around her. Jeff is not so clueless anymore, and despite Natasha's best efforts, he can tell there is something very, very wrong.

"Mrrr?" Jeff asks as he tilts his head towards you. Natasha releases him from her grasp, restoring his hearing and allowing him to walk in your direction.

You hold out your arms and let him cuddle closer before telling him the truth, “I’m sick, Jeff.” Tears fall sporadically onto his smooth head and you inhale sharply; it really is no easier to say a second time."I don't know if you even know what cancer is, but I'm gonna keep fighting it, try to stay with you and Nat, but… well, it's not guaranteed that I'll get better."

Jeff silently hops out of your lap and exits the room, leaving you worried that you've said too much…that he might be upset, angry, or just needing space to cope. Assuming the latter, you do nothing to stop him; you simply watch him leave. Natasha leans over and you wrap an arm around her shoulder; after a life of missions, countless bullet wounds, and a plethora of near-death scares, you never thought it would end like this.

The two of you are still in that position, contemplating the ironies of life, when Jeff returns. You suddenly sit up straight, relieved to have Jeff back but also bracing yourself to answer any questions he might have. But instead of that, the land shark trails a blanket behind him, while his favourite toy is balanced atop his head. He drops both in front of you before walking out once more.

Natasha reacts first, starting with a small chuckle, that grows into a full blown laugh when she meets your eye and sees you struggling not to do the same. Soon enough, the absurdity of the situation – especially after the gravity of the previous conversation – leads to you laughing along with your wife. You keep meeting her eyes in an attempt to ask a silent question of 'do you understand what's going on?', but it is clear her answer is 'no' and all you're accomplishing is reviving her laughter every time it reaches its dying stages.

Luckily, your confusion is put to rest just minutes later. Jeff pushes a large, locked, and recognisable tin of treats through the door – they are the special kind of treats that you usually reserve for when Jeff is ill, a small treat to help him feel better. The pieces click in your mind and you realise that the items Jeff brought are not as eclectic as you previously thought. The blanket, the toy, the treats – they are all the items you give to Jeff when he's sick.

"What's all this?" Natasha asks him. Her tone is still light, and she looks to you to share the amusement. You smile gently, but it is a surprise to you that she hasn't put the pieces together herself – it's rare for her to be trailing you in her understanding. The knowledge of your condition is still new to her, you remember, and you realise she has already pushed it from her mind, there would be no question about Jeff's actions otherwise. Natasha knows you are going to die. And she is refusing to believe it.

"Mrrrr!"

"He wants to make me okay again," you translate, and Natasha's previously joyous face falls when she's forced to remember. The expression pains you to watch so you turn to Jeff instead.

"Mrrrr?" he asks.

“Yeah, Jeff, yeah it’s working. I feel better already.” The land shark hums contentedly at your reassurance. “Now come on up, bud, are you sleepy? I am. We can take a nap together.”

“I’ll be outside,” Natasha murmurs, her expression still not lifted, “call if you need anything.” You note her sunken eyes and the worried frown and read it for what it is: a request for space, for you to allow her to process this.

You nod. “We’re going to be okay, aren’t we Jeff?”

She reads that for what it is: a promise larger than this moment alone… and a lie.

As the months pass, changes in your life are inevitable: you ground yourself from field missions, the treatments and their side effects taking too great a toll for you to safely perform your job. But while your life has to change, the same is not true for Natasha and Jeff. Though they attempt to change their routines to suit you – Natasha offers to work from home, while Jeff proposes trips to other rooms in the house instead of the beach where he would rather be – you deny them both, hiding the true extent of your weakness in order that they keep living the life they deserve to live.

It works, for a time, Natasha still takes missions, Yelena takes Jeff when you're too weak to entertain him, and the team works better than ever in their assignment to keep you rested. But at your next check-up, you realise it was all in vain.

You’re given time to contemplate in the hospital, and you use it wisely: you think of Natasha and how you will tell her, knowing the second you do she’ll rush home and never leave your side again. You think of your life and everything leading to now – sure, there’s plenty more out there, but if the doctor is right, then you’re satisfied with what you’ve had. The life you’ve lived wasn’t bad at all. Finally, you think of Jeff, who is still so young; you ask the nurse to call Yelena, if the cancer is spreading then you want to spend every last second with Jeff and give him as many happy memories as you can.

The land shark in question barrels into you the moment you cross out of the hospital’s threshold; Yelena sprints forward to catch you, giving you stability while Jeff eagerly circles the two of you like he’s drawing a figure of eight. 

“Hello to you too, Jeff,” you laugh. You try to embed his contented purrs in your brain, forever wanting to live in that moment, crouched on the floor and scratching him behind his fin.

But then Yelena asks: “was it good news?” and reality comes crashing back down. 

It’s a funny thing, that moment. Around you visitors, patients, and workers all filter in and out, Jeff doesn’t notice a thing, still roaming happily, but for you – and for Yelena, since she knows as soon as your face falls – the answer to the Widow’s question slows time to a halt just so it can drain joy out of every molecule of your surroundings.

“Oh” is all Yelena says.

“Yeah,” you say, “maybe we should go to the car.”

Yelena wordlessly leads the way. Meanwhile, Jeff seems close to bursting with how much he has to tell you of his time at Yelena’s. After one nod, the floodgates open to spew what seems to be a minute-by-minute recount of the week.

“I remember that one, Jeff, I was still at home then,” you interrupt, but that only forces Jeff to restart from the beginning – you decide to stay quiet after that. In truth, Jeff’s narration is exactly what you need; the journey home would be silent otherwise with you staring out of the window, lost in thought, and Yelena driving, facing forwards, not knowing what to say or what to ask. The conversation would come – if not now then when Natasha returns – but for this moment, Jeff’s tale of losing his plush toy under Yelena’s bed makes for ample distraction. You could live that moment a thousand times over.

A soft ‘mrrr’ sounds again from just outside the hospital door, this time followed by a scratch, and then silence falls. Natasha knows she should get it – to let Jeff in and break him from a limbo he isn’t even aware he is in, but she can’t bring herself to do it, not when she knows what awaits him when the barrier of the door is removed. To him, your life is as certain as that of Schrödinger's cat, a fate unknown to the landshark; except Jeff’s thoughts rarely err on the side of realism and his optimistic tendencies generally benefit his perception…until they give him further to fall.

And yet, when he whines again, when the nurse goes to open the door for him, and even when he comes barrelling down the ward to see you, Natasha stays frozen in place, doing nothing to stop his inevitable realisation.

Your heart had stopped eleven minutes before.

“Mrrrr?” Jeff greets, nuzzling at your leg. You don’t reply. He notices Natasha sob, but thinks nothing of it, she had been crying more over the past few weeks. 

“Mrrr?” he tries again; you had been growing weaker, but still mustered the energy to reach for him whenever he was allowed to visit, unless you were asleep. So he turns to Natasha, she cannot understand him the same way you do, but signing allows her a base level understanding of his language. He nudges first to get her attention, then waves a hand down his face: ‘Asleep?’

Natasha’s sobs suddenly get heavier, jolting Jeff but ultimately spurring him into action to comfort his other parent: ‘are you okay?’. The assassin takes a deep, shaky breath, but wipes her eyes and nods.

"Y/N, um, they are asleep…in a way." Staring into Jeff's hopeful eyes only brings more tears to Natasha's own; she has to look away, her eyes falling to watch as she spins the ring on her finger. "You remember how we said that a time might come where one of us isn't around anymore? If Y/N's sickness didn't go away?"

Jeff nods.

"Well that's happened. Y/N's asleep and they-" her voice cracks- "they're not going to be waking up. Y/N is gone, Jeff. They're gone." Through blurry eyes, Natasha risks a glance back to Jeff, only to see his whole body drooped like never before and the hope – the belief that had inspired you to keep fighting throughout the whole illness – was gone from his eyes.

"Mrrrr?"

"I…I don't know what you're saying, Jeff, I'm sorry, that was always…" Natasha trails off, not willing to accept you were gone just yet.

Jeff mrrs again; he signs as he goes but his hands fly faster then Natasha can comprehend, at least in this state. 'I failed' she catches before he turns to where you rest, 'I'm sorry'.

Jeff taglist: @unexpected-character @wolferine

[yawntutsyip]

Warnings: none

AN: I felt bad that I deleted this story 😭, I lost all motivation for writing it and I didn’t realize that people actually liked it 🙏😔 forgive me. I’ve been trying to figure out what I’m gonna do for the plot so I think I came up with something I like so hopefully it will go good. I also fixed some grammar mistakes and spelling errors so hopefully it’s all good now mb if there still some

Context: Your father had fallen sick causing you and your mother, along with your father, to move villages. Needing help from the Tsahìk. Ronal discovers that you were interested in learning about herbs and healing she began to take you under he wing teaching you everything she knew as if you were the Tsahìk in training. After she and Tonowari learns that you haven't been able to make friends thought the years you've been in the village she (forces) suggest that you hang out with Ao'nung and his friends hopping that will help.

Ngaytxoa: Sorry , Apologies

Nari si skxawng: watch out moron

Za'u : come here

Kaltxi sa'nu, sempul : Hello mother, father

'itetsyìp : a name for daughter

Mawey: calm down

Irayo: thank you, thanks

Fnu: be quiet

I see you | Chapter One

As (Y/N) grew up she could tell something was wrong with her father, Every week it seemed that he had gotten weaker and weaker.

It had gotten so bad he eventually was on permanent bed rest having to be cared for by her mother at all times.

Having such a close bond with her parents she never left their side unless she had to run an errand for her mother.

Through the years of being by her mother's side and the frequent healers that could come and help, she began to study and learn from them

Taking mental notes and practicing in her own time she learned what things mixed with what, and what you should and shouldn’t use.

It was the only thing that kept the little girl's mind off of the terrible situation.

As time continued to pass, on (Y/N)’s 12th birthday just when it had seemed like everything was getting better and her father had seemed like he was healing just fine

It seemed to immediately shoot back down and he had fallen ill once again now even worse.

His body turned immune to the medicine that he was given.

The girl's mother was deeply frustrated and in pain from seeing her mate in this state.

Her mother began to shut down, hardly talking to anyone and never leaving her mate's side. Focused on one thing which was taking care of her mate, making sure he was getting the help he needed.

When (Y/N) tried talking with her mother she would only reply in short responses. It hurt the poor girl, she now finds herself wishing she had a mother again.

Soon enough the healers decide to talk your mom into traveling to the nearby village where they had more healers and the Tsahik that was able to see what was exactly going on.

It did not take long for your mother to decide on an answer and immediately began packing up bags. (Y/N) could not complain and only helped her mom pack.

Traveling to the village took about a day and by the time the family arrived in Awa’atlu, it was night.

The only light sources were the torches that were scattered around the Marui huts, the bioluminescent plants in the water, and the bright stars that were shining above.

(Y/N) was swimming on an ilu next to her mother who was on her skimwing with your father laid in front of her.

When they had come into the village's view, a loud horn reached their ears announcing their arrival as they continued to move closer.

Finally, they reached the land and immediately her father was carried away by some men, which (Y/N) would assume they were taking him to the healing hut. Her mother quickly followed shortly leaving (Y/N) all by herself.

The little girl stood there unsure of what to do, her mother and father were out of view so there was no way she would be able to find them without getting lost, this village was much bigger than her previous one.

Tears begin to cloud over her eyes piling up, threatening to spill down her aqua cheeks.

This whole journey she tried to put a strong face for her mother and father, she knew they were already dealing with a lot and didn’t want to worry them.

But once her parents were out of sight, that wall that she so bravely built up slowly began to break down.

Tears were now sliding down her face as they dropped into the sand below.

A gentle hand was laid on her shoulder. (Y/N) looked up and with her blurry view she could make out a woman in front of her slowly crouching down.

The woman’s hands move from the girl's shoulder to caressing her cheeks, using her thumbs to wipe the tears that slipped out.

“Hello my child, please do not be sad. Your father is in good care now.” The woman’s words reassured (Y/N). “I am the Tsahik, may I know your name sweetheart?” Ronal asked the small child in a soft voice, afraid of startling her.

“(Y/N)... (Y/N) te Ftxey Aman’ite, Tsahik” She replies shyly with quiet sniffles, using the back of her hand to wipe the tears away from her eyes.

“(Y/N), You have a beautiful name..Let's grab your bags and I will walk you to new Marui. It’ll be close to the healing hut so you can see your parents then.

Ronal smiled and stood up grabbing the bags that were sitting in the sand. Ronal swung some of the bags over her shoulder and then looked back at (Y/N) who was doing the same actions.

Ronal reaches her hand out to the little girl, (Y/N) hesitated at first, I mean after all this was a stranger, but then grabbed the Tsahik’s hand, and they began to walk further from the water and into the village.

“You will like it here, I promise”

"Ngaytxoa Tsahìk!" You said to the older woman once you had arrived in the healing pod where there stayed your father along with some other injured and sick members that the healers were helping with.

On the way to the pod one of the aunties had asked you for help with carrying a basket of dried kelp for weaving and it took a little longer than you thought.

"It's alright (Y/N), as long as you're here now. I have a list of herbs I need you to collect for me really quick and then we began the lessons" Ronal said as she was finishing wrapping a younger boys arm then proceeds to grab a list off the table handing it out to you.

"Of course, I will be back shortly!" You say smiling, grabbing the list before leaving the pod.

You began to walk down the paths to collect herbs from where ever they stay. Some were different fruit and roots where you had to scavenge for and others were stuff you could get from different farmers around the island.

Once you finished you waved bye to the farmers with your filled basket you had been carrying, having all the herbs from Ronal's list in it, making your way back to the Tsahìk.

On your way back you stop for a second as you watched some of the Metkayina girls the same age hanging out together, some were braiding each others hair while others were talking probably gossiping about the newest drama that had rumored around the village.

You let out a sigh with a small frown.

You wanted to make friends but it was as if they avoided you like you were the plague.

You hung out with Tsireya a couple times but her other friends always pulled her away from you or Tsireya was busy taking her own lessons from her mother so you guys never had an actual hang out without someone coming to interrupt.

Shrugging off the sad feeling that began to rise, you begin to continue your way back.

As you were about to walk in the pod you accidentally runs into someone almost falling back at the impact.

Catching yourself, you stands straight and looks at the person you ran into about to apologize before your eyes widen as you realizes who it was.

It was one of the girls who Tsireya was always hanging out with.

"Ngaytxoa.. I didn't see you there." You say say embarrassed and looks down as if the ground was the most fascinating thing.

The girl could only scoff in annoyance and roll her eyes not bothering to pay attention to you before walking off muttering some words that you just barley heard purposely hitting your shoulder with hers.

"nari si skxawng"

You could only brush it off and continue to walk inside.

"Tsahìk I'm back! I have all the stuff you asked for." You announced as you pushes past the door to the table about to set down the basket.

"za'u (Y/N), with the basket" Ronal motioned as she was sat down on a mat with Mortar and pestle in front of her along with some water.

Turning back around you follow the orders and sets the basket down by the Tsahìk before sitting in front of her.

"Let's get to work shall we?" You could only nod her head and with that Ronal began to teach you.

"Alright, thats enough for today. Did you understand everything?" The older woman asked while standing up with the new paste you both had just made in a bowl

"Yes, thank you for teaching me" you say responding before helping Ronal clean up.

"Do you want me to walk with you back to your Marui?"

"No, I'm gonna stay here for a little bit. Thank you." And with that Ronal nodded as her eyes softened with her smile faltering before leaving the healing pod back her to own Marui.

You let out a weary sigh before walking to the back of the pod to a more secluded area where he father stayed.

"Kaltxi sa'nu, sempul" You greet your parents knowing you wouldn't get a response back, only a small nod of acknowledgment from your mother who had her back towards you while laying a new cloth on your fathers forehead.

"how is he doing?" You crouch down next to your mother sitting on your knees as you observe.

After a long pause of quietness, your mother finally spoke up looking at her daughter.

"he's getting better now, thanks to you and the Tsahìks help" Aman (her mothers name) spoke to her daughter as she reaches forward and brushes a stray hair behind your ear before caressing your cheek.

You could only lean into your mothers touch.

Aman had gotten better at talking to her daughter again after the Tsahìk had scolded her for not paying attention, neglecting, her own child. She needs a reality check.

"It's getting late, you should head back to our Marui" Aman spoke to you bringing back her hand before checking on her mate once again.

"Will you be coming back with me this time? You asked with hope in your eyes that her mother would finally come home for once but once yoy looked at your mothers face with a sadden expression, you knew it wasn't going to happen.

"I'm sorry 'itetsyìp. Not tonight.."

You say nothing and nod. You got up and gave your parents both a quick peck on the cheek before leaving making your way back to your family's Marui.

You could feel tears fill your eyes but you refused to let them fall wiping them with the back of your hand letting out a shaky sigh.

Before you reached the Marui a hand landed on your shoulder startling you causing you to jump letting out a quiet yet loud shriek.

"Woah, mawey (Y/N)!" A familiar female voice said as you turned around to see Tsireya.

"Sorry for startling you, my mother asked me to grab you to have dinner with us! My father and Ao'nung had caught some extra fish and we can't eat it all~ come on" Tsireya said while grabbing your arm locking it with hers not waiting for an answer before pulling you in the direction of their Marui pod.

The two girls reach the pod and Tsireya walks in holding the door open for (Y/N) to walk in.

You mutters a quiet thank you giving the girl a smile before greeting everyone that was now sitting down getting ready to eat.

"Irayo Tsahìk, Olo'eyktan for having me over."

"No worries (Y/N) come in sit down next to Ao'nung" Ronal says smiling before telling Ao'nung to scoot over to make more room to which he only rolled his eyes before moving.

You sit down and everyone began to eat while the family made small talk with eachother while you just stayed quiet listening, only talking if they asked for an opinion or a question.

While eating you swear you could feel a burning gaze watching you, when you lifted your head and turn you meet Ao'nung's eyes staying back into yours.

Waiting for his eyes to pull away he never did and continued to stare, with what look in his eye? You couldn't exactly tell but you swore there was an extra sparkle.

Finally getting the hint he wasn't going to back down you quickly look away with blush creeping on your cheeks and continue to eat.

"(Y/N) have you been making any friends, you know the girls that Tsireya hangs out with?" Ronal asks looking at her causing all of them to go quiet and listen.

"Uh...well..not exactly...I guess they are always busy when I try and hang out with them.." you says now playing with your food in awkwardness.

"What? Tsireya I thought I told you to take in (Y/N) and make sure she was not being left out" Ronal questions her daughter in disappointment.

"Well...Ngaytxoa sa'nu...I thought they were hanging out with (Y/N). Ngaytxoa (Y/N)" Tsireya frowns upset that her friends weren't being nice to you.

"It's alright, I don't really need to hang out with them anyways I'm good with just hanging around with you Tsahìk" you could only smile reassuring the family theses no need to worry.

"Nonsense! (Y/N) you are still a kid. As much as I like having your company You need to go hang out with people your own age sometimes." Ronal replies to you.

"Why don't you hang out with Ao'nung and Rotxo! Rotxo is a good boy. Very respectful and I'm sure Ao'nung would be happy to have you hang out with him, right Ao'nung?!" Tonowari speaks up looking at Ao'nung.

Ao'nung's mouth is open astonished that his father even suggested that. "What? Why does she have to-"

Before he could finish his sentence his mother interrupts him with a harsh glare making him immediately shut up.

"Right Ao'nung?" Ronal says smiling yet still glaring at the poor boy who could only nervously avoid his mothers fiery gaze.

"Yes. She can hang out with us tomorrow..." he grumbles out shoving the last bit of food in his mouth no longer paying attention to the conversation that was going on.

"See (Y/N) there you go, You have some people to hang out with." You could only smile with a nod before going back to eating.

A little bit later everyone was finally done eating you began to help Tsireya clean up the plates.

"(Y/N) you don't have to help Tsireya. Ao'nung will walk you to your Marui" Tonowari told you with a hand on your shoulder grabbing the dishes that were in her hands.

"Oh no it's alright-" (Y/N) began to speak but was cut off with Ronal shaking her head telling you no before pushing you toward the door where Ao'nung stood muttering words under his breath that you couldn't make out.

"Okay then...goodnight, thank you for having me over for dinner" You smiled waving bye to them as you exits the Marui with Ao'nung following behind.

You and Ao'nung walk to your Marui in silence.

While you were in your own world thinking to yourself , you didn't notice a certain boys eyes on you.

Ao'nung couldn't help it, He found the Metkayina girl beautiful. But the boys ego was too high for him to talk to you and confess his attraction.

He could only play it off with being annoyed. I mean it sorta annoyed him. He never had a full conversation or even looked at you straight in the eyes..So why was he attracted to you so much. It made him frustrated.

He remembered the first time seeing you was when he got in an argument with another Metkayina boy that resulted in flying fist and so there he sat with a bloody lip and a cut on his cheek.

And out of all the healers he gotten (Y/N) to patch him up. The whole time she was making the paste she never said a word and he was thankful because the last thing he needed was another person asking what happened.

When it came to the girl applying the paste all he could think about was how her soft hands gently applied it to his cheek muttering apologies as he hissed from the sting.

But if he was being honest the butterflies in his stomach distracted him more.

He didn't realize until she was done that he had been admiring her face. Staring mostly at her darker aqua marking that were scattered framing your face, and the bioluminescent freckles sprinkled all over. How her hair was done in traditional Metkayina style (picture whatever you like) and it complemented her well.

Ao'nung snaps out of his thoughts and comes to a halt as you both stand in front of your empty Marui.

"Thank you, I'm sorry for causing you trouble.. I can just say that I'm busy tomorrow so I don't have to hang out with you" You say thanking him as you shyly stare at the ground.

While Ao'nung wanted to tell you 'no don't be! I actually want to hang out with you and get to know you' before he could think, all that came out was a

"Fnu" Ao'nung shouted and it came out a lot harsher than he meant. His eyes slightly widen with his ears lowering in embarrassment.

It made you jump a little taken back from how harsh his words came at you.

"Ngaytxoa. I'll see you tomorrow." Ao'nung said, this time in a softer voice. And with that he quickly walked away back to his Marui pod and you enter yours.

Yet another sigh of disappointment left your lips as you rub your face in frustration.

'Alone once again..'

[kortsitron]

Little distractions

Pairing: Niran Pruksamanee/Lifeweaver × Gender Neutral! Reader

Warnings: mentions of depression, fluff

Summary: Niran is aware that you have hard time distraction yourself from depressive thoughts, luckily he knows a way to keep you distracted (and entertained)

Author’s Note: I know this may not be an actual way to deal with unpleasant feelings, yet I thought the idea was pretty cute. If you’re struggling with depression or any other mental illness, please seek professional help. I believe that everything is going to be alright and I wish you the best <3 Also enjoy this one shot! ♥️

Niran knew how much you struggled. He held you as you cried your eyes out, he was going to the doctors with you when you asked him to, he was doing his best to help you. And yet, after all day of smiles and fun, he knew that at the end of the day, you would either overwork yourself to try to distract yourself or you would get back to being numb. But he wasn’t even near giving up.

Maybe it was his positive attitude, which made him earn the nickname “Sunshine” from you, or just how much he was in love with you.

You were laying on the couch, working on your laptop in the living room when you noticed Niran getting ready. You raised an eyebrow, wondering where he was going. “Where are you going, Sunshine?” You made eye contact with him. You saw the way he finished tying his shoes and the way his face from focused, turned into a soft smile as he stood up and approached you. “You dirty the floor, Niran.” You signed as you leaned your head against the arm of the coach to get a better look at your boyfriend.

“Apologies.” He awkwardly looked at the floor and back at you. “I’ll be meeting Baptiste, we have some stuff to do. Not sure when I’ll be back, but if something bad happens, call me or Satya, okay?” You nodded. He kissed your forehead before heading to the door. “I should be back in around two hours. Love you, don’t overwork yourself, bye!” He waved at you before leaving, watching as a smile creeped on your face and a light blush appeared on your cheeks.

You laid in your bed as tears were streaming down your cheeks. Your mind was too loud for you to think properly and you were waiting for Niran to get back. You started to wonder if you should call him, but you didn't want to bother him. 

“Is that everything?” You heard a masculine voice with a Haitian accent.

“I think so, thanks for the help.” Niran answered the voice. You wiped tears from your face before you adjusted your clothes and went to the living room to see what was going on. Niran smiled at you as you entered the room. Niran frowned his eyebrows as soon as he noticed your red face and slightly puffy eyes. “Hello, dear. Are you okay?” There was a worry in his tone. He approached you, rubbing your arms up and down to hopefully bring you comfort.

“Yeah um… What’s all this stuff?” You asked, pointing to the objects your boyfriend brought home. Cat tree, a bed, a bunch of colorful bowls, a litter box and a box from which came high sounds. Niran saw the way you pouted, clearly not happy with his purchase. “Care to explain, Bua?” The tone of your voice showing him how displeased you were.

Niran was caught off guard by the nickname. It was the moment he realized that you were actually unsatisfied. “Well…” He looked over at his friend. “Baptiste, care for help?”

“It was your idea, I only helped you with bringing the things here.” The man just shook his head, chuckling quietly at the whole situation. “I’ll be heading back home, tell me later how it all went.” Baptiste informed as he left, hoping to not get invested more in the current situation.

Your eyes went from the door, to your boyfriend. “So?” You continued, watching how Niran’s cheeks suddenly turned pink.

“We don’t you see for yourself?” He took your hand in his, taking you to the middle of the living room. “Sit down please.” Without much thinking, you did, but your eyes never left him. You watched as he brought the box in front of you and sat on the floor himself. 

You heard the noises better. It was meowing. “You brought a kitten here?! Niran we-” You paused in the middle of the sentence. Listening intently to the sounds. It wasn’t just one kitten. You glanced at the said box, then back at Niran. Grin on his face as he watched you realize. “How many are there?”

“A bunch.” He shrugged, said grin not leaving face. “Why don’t you open up and see for yourself?”

You hesitated for a second, hands shook lightly before landing on the box and opening it up. Now meowing was resonating in the whole living room. You watched as six kittens were leaving the box, meowing and stomping their little paws on the floor. You heard a chuckle coming from Niran, as he watched your reaction. He noticed that you were processing what was happening before you. 

You finally woke up from the trance, which seemed like hours. “Niran we need to get them back where they came from. I don’t think we can… We can…” You paused as you felt one of the kittens getting on your lap, meowing at you and rubbing itself against you.

“Don’t you think it would be a little rude if we brought them back?” Niran commented calmly, petting the nearest kitten. “Besides, I brought them here to help you.”

“Help me? What do you mean?” Confusion painted itself on your face, as you waited for the answer.

“I know you have a problem with distracting yourself when you start feeling bad, so I thought that you could use these little distractions. I’m sure they’ll keep you busy.”

“But six?”

“I planned on getting two or three at first, but I saw that little group and couldn’t help myself.” You heard the excitement in his voice as he explained. You couldn’t help, but smile softly at him, feeling a warmth in your heart.

You signed. “I guess we can keep them. But only because you will be whining endlessly if we bring them back.”

Niran gasped dramatically. “No, you fell for them as well and you just don't want to admit it!” You chuckled, shaking your head. “You know I’m right!” He pointed at you, smiling from ear to ear.

“Okay, okay. You got me there.” You put your hands up, showing how defeated you were.

“That’s what I thought.” He smirked at you, clearly satisfied. He looked around, watching the kittens walk around. “I think we should give them some food.” He commented, with a bit more serious tone than before. He stood up, holding his hand out to help you with standing out. You gladly accepted it as soon as you took the kitten off your lap.

“You sure we have enough money to keep them? Perhaps you should work on some form of light that’s edible.” Niran laughed at your suggestion.

“Perhaps I should. And you should give them names. They’re ours now.”

“We should give them names.”

[kalcifers-blog]

IRIS FILES - ROBBIE THE ZOMBIE

CW - Physical/Mental Deterioration, Derealization, Rotting Alive, Zombification, Bugs/Insects, Medical Horror

Word Count: 994

Character Count: 4,271

CLASSIFICATION: ALTR 181502

ALTR AGE: 24 YRS OLD

ALTR HEIGHT: 5 “5

ALTR SEX: X

ALTR STATUS: UNSTABLE

ALTR INFO: 18152 contracted an unknown illness after an encounter with ALTR 114209. He was advised to keep track of his symptoms in the form of a journal; IRIS Researchers have secured the journal to track 18152's both physical and mental development.

08/09/2016

“Not been great lately, I've had cold or flu symptoms for the past two weeks, really has been messing with my focus, not great for when I'm trying to study or play as well as I usually can but I've been pushing through it!

I'm still a bit shaken up from that creepy ass guy from last month- it messed with me. I'm glad IRIS is here to help out with my case tho, hopefully they catch the freak. I keep getting all fidgety and anxious whenever I'm out in public. I mean I guess that's normal after something like that but still, doesn't make it easier. I would hang out with friends to make me feel safer but I don't wanna get them sick, hopefully this'll pass

-R”

15/09/2016

“God my head will not stop pounding, I got my headache about 2 days ago, it started off only occasionally but god it just keeps flaring up and more often. My flu hasn't gotten any better. It makes it hard to do anything, I keep getting by, slowly but surely.

-R”

22/09/2016

“Been bed ridden this week- I thought rest would probably help but, every time I sleep I keep dreaming of that guy- I don't remember it fully and it's probably just some weird trauma thing but he keeps.. I don't really know how to describe it? He keeps warping. I don't know its probably just some dream shit”

29/09/2016

“haven't been able to eat properly.. keep feeling this itch on my neck, its not bad just annoying mostly. My phone hurts my eyes. Keep dreaming of creeper.im sure he didn't actually look like that. Sorry for the bad handwriting, I'm so tired nd my hands hurt. Might try sleeping again”

30/09/2016

“woke up and puked, pretty badly too- dreaming of that guy hurts my head”

05/10/2016

“Really should call a doctor I think. I did call IRIS, I'm sure I did, they said they'd send someone over. No one came- my body hurts, everywhere it's just this dull ache. I might try

and shower or something. I don't know what to do at this point- no ones coming I've waited and waited and no one showed. The itching got worse, I don't know what's wrong with me I just need someone to come help”

“Why is no one answering my calls???”

12/10/2016

“Tried to shower, clumps of my hair just- came out. I just cried something is wrong with me I called IRIS again I told them it was urgent and I need help. The creeper answered me. It couldn't have been real- but it made me throw my phone accidentally. It broke and I can't get it to work again. I can't keep going on like this. The itching keeps spreading too- it now feels like things are crawling in my organs. I can't scratch there”

“Threw up again, mostly blood- it was clumpy, I think it was bits of my throat. It hurts my throat to breathe let alone talk”

16/10/2016

“The man in my room can't be here- I didn't let anyone in, he shouldn't be here”

23/10/2016

“I found out why I feel like there things crawling in me. I threw up a dead bug. The itching keeps going. I think I need to leave”

“I left my apartment. The air stung and I felt everyone's eyes on me. I don't care i just need help”

“IRIS won't let me in. Or near anyone.”

30/10/2016

“They're keeping me here. They keep giving me things. They poked IVs in me- the skin just teared away. It hurt so much, it feels good to actually be given medication. It's not kicked in yet but I think it should soon. The nurse gave me a funny look when I described my creep to him. I don't know, I just wanna sleep”

IRIS Supplemental:

ALTR 181502, previously known as Robert “Robbie” James, was announced as clinically dead to the public on 05/11/2016. Within the IRIS Foundation however it should be known that ALTR 181502, while maintaining a “corpse-like” appearance, is very much alive. IRIS researchers and medics have been working on a plausible theory on the rapid and alarming decline in ATLR 181502’s health after an apparent encounter with ALTR 114209. This variation of effects with 114209 seems to be an outlier. But until a working theory has been confirmed, the containment is highly necessary for both ALTR 181502 and for the wider public. Some IRIS staff have left due to unknown illnesses after contact with ALTR 181502. Their symptoms are yet to be examined but they are all in highly secure quarantine zones until they are confirmed to not be carrying a “Zombie Virus” as the research staff seem to be calling it.

As for ALTR 181502- exact details of his initial encounter with ALTR 114209 are documented in his original report to IRIS. His condition remains unpleasant. And it seems the best we can hope for is to keep him in containment until we understand what's going on.

The journal, as well as the remainder of ALTR 181502's belongings have been quarantined or burned. We managed to digitise his IRIS issued journal for the research sake. In said journal we believe the figure he describes is ALTR 114209- as it is within it's behaviour to torment it's victims while they are in mental distress.

It was discovered, by one such medic, after attempting an autopsy on ALTR 181502, that he is very much no longer human. If the hive of moth larvae that has eaten away at all of his organs have anything to say about it at least. How he still is living, albeit not pleasantly, is about as good a guess as yours as it is mine.

End Supplemental.

[spunky-89]

How They Met

A/N: Wow time flies! Sorry this took forever but I had a lot going on these last few weeks and life just decided there was no time for writing. It’s short, and I kinda feel like it sucks, but this is the first actual fic writing I've posted in over 2 years, so I'm a bit rusty tbh

Anyway, here is the first of hopefully many blurbs/stories of Luna & Zavrik. Zavrik belongs to lovely @dark-and-kawaii, thanks for sharing him with me 💖

Luna'leivel nearly cried in relief when she was finally able to rest after a long round of 'tests'. She pulled herself into a corner and curled into herself. She then started quietly humming a lullaby her nanny taught her many years ago. It helped her to focus on something other than the throbbing of her body and its many wounds. 

To Luna, time passed strangely during these moments. The moments of rest after a particularly rough day, where she'd retreat into her own mind to regulate her emotions and numb the pain. It usually was long enough for Luna to feel at least somewhat better, but on that day it felt like all too soon that her mother, Iliae'vel, was nudging Luna with her foot to stir her.

At that moment, her surroundings shifted rapidly as the pain and dread of having to move caused a new, strange, sensation.

Suddenly, the relative darkness and stuffy air of the basement she knew as her home was replaced with bright sunlight and fresh, crisp autumn air. For a moment, she was awed that she was actually outside. Her body then harshly reminded her of her situation when her knees buckled and pain shot through her from her unhealed wounds, adding a new array of fresh ones from hitting the ground.

The wind was knocked out of her and her senses were muddled, whether from the pain or sudden magic that brought her here, she wasn't quite sure. She tried to take in her surroundings, but her ears felt muffled and her eyes blurry. Getting nowhere with her assessment, Luna curled onto her side and pressed her hands to her eyes. She tried to focus and center herself, panic would not aid her in this moment. So, despite the pain in her chest, she tried to take a handful of deep breaths to collect herself.

Beginning to regain her senses, Luna looked up to see a tall tiefling male coming towards her rapidly. She could tell he was speaking, but she still couldn't quite hear right and it sounded garbled. The man reached out to help her as she attempted to right herself, and her senses cleared just enough to hear him ask if she was alright and where she came from. 

He quickly crouched near her and offered a helping hand to steady her. Luna gripped his forearm and struggled, but managed to sit up on her knees with his assistance. Once settled, she held a hand to her ribs to try to dull the pain of breathing and tried to answer his questions. Despite her best efforts, every time she attempted to open her mouth to speak, a sharp pain ripped across her face. Though she tasted her own blood, she kept trying while pained cries slipped out more than words. Noticing her struggle, the man was quick to hush her.

"Hey, hey, take it easy,” He spoke softly as he gently turned her face to assess the damage, “maybe don't try to talk right now, your face is banged up pretty good."

The man started to look around as Luna caught her breath. As they sat for a moment, she started to take in the man's features. He was tall, or at least much taller than her, and broad, wearing ornamental but practical armor with a sizable sword strapped to his back. When he looked back to her, his face showed concern, and while he didn't seem to hold ill intent, Luna was still wary. Even so, Luna knew her chance of escape was limited, so she chose to take the aid of this stranger.

"Do you think you try to stand now?" The man asked.

Luna took a breath and nodded. She grabbed at his offered forearms and readied herself to get up, but the shouting of her name and running footsteps froze her in place, the terror all but paralyzing her.

The man, who seemed to notice the shift in demeanor, moved to stand and face the incoming party.

A tall, thin, well-dressed woman whipped around the corner, her face filled with cold fury. However, her expression rapidly shifted to one of false concern and relief when she noticed there was someone else in the alley with Luna.

Shaking, Luna placed one of her hands on the man’s arm, almost tugging at him.

"Please, don't let them take me back."

[goatlingsvent]

Hey, Demi here. I've known about this place for a little thanks to a different user and have avoided touching this place, but since I've been banned, I don't care anymore.

I don't know why or how, but I was banned for having an alt. which I don't have nor never had. I literally got up for a few minutes to look for my earbuds, only to come back to me banned. Considering staff has refused to answer my friends requests for them to email me or answer my emails asking for proof about this supposed "alt account", I'm afraid I'll never get my goats back.

So, at this point, I'm assuming this is a misunderstanding, or I've been framed. So congrats! Billions of ss worth of items are now gone to the void. Better make my lost DOTD count 21 because staff won't even fucking talk to me.

I haven't even been playing that much as of late, not as much as I used to. I was excited to have my IRL friends be able to join MM, but I guess they're doing it without me! And the prize goat for the giveaway? Say goodbye to them and all the retired shit they had because I was trying to help someone else get back into their account so they could donate. Oops, it looks like no one gets any of it!

Perhaps this is good for me. Even though I had refrained from spending money on Goatlings (I did the math and spent well over $4,000 in this goat forsaken site alone), this is now one less avenue for me to relapsePlaying, even if it may sound stupid, literally had negative physical repercussions on my heart and the way my brain makes adrenaline. I can't be excited for shit now without the adrenaline causing severe anxiety instead. So maybe this is good. I already regretted spending the money and regret it even more now!

To the people who hated me because I was annoying or some shit, you could have just, you know, talked to me about it? I'm not a mind reader, I'm a guy with autism and a potential learning disability, learn to fucking communicate with people omg... Alot of your petty beef would be less abundant if you nicely talked it over with people. Why haven't I done that? Because I never felt like a personal problem with anyone! I didn't let little things take over my mind like a brain fungus that makes you stupid.

I may never get my account back. And hopefully, the anxiety and stress of it all will soon subside. Goatlings is becoming more of a hell hole, and I suggest you all quit before you lose it all, or it consumes you. You all sound so miserable... I wish I could help, but I already got my hands full with 3 little brothers and my mentally ill self. If I could buy the site from Kris, I would, and as much as some of you hate me, at least I would listen to your concerns about the site itself.

This may be long as hell, but I care or at least cared for the Goatlings community. Even to those who hate me. If I can't work this out with staff, I'll be here on Tumblr and on Flight Rising. You're lucky I didn't get my hands on the Sweet Nightmares I was gonna get from a buddy soon.

Quit while you still have control. This site isn't worth your well-being.

To long don't care: Demi got banned for having an alt he never made, and staff (so far) won't answer his stupid ass emails. Billions of ss lost.

Live life, love yourself, fuck cops 🥳🎉

🌐

[valentine-writes]

Could you write something about hanahaki disease with Johnathon ohnn? (Could end in angst or fluff either is good :3) no rush ofc, i love your work!!!

choking on flowers.

「 tws + notes: open ended ending, implications/mentions of death (but no Actual Death), unedited, OOC, interpretation of hanahaki may be slightly diff (i haven't heard of this trope thing in a hot min ngl so im not the Greatest With This), pre-collider even though his holes generating flowers is a silly thought which i giggled abt while writing this, present/past tenses are fucked up cuz i changed formatting halfway, angst?? 」

「 gn!reader, (unrequited) romantic relationship </3 」

↳ ft. johnathan/johnathon ohnn

author's note: THANK U SMMM!! (∩^o^)⊃━☆ lowkey 4got thiz thing existed lolz,, and while hanahaki aus are no longer My Thing, i wud b lying if i told u i didn't eat hanahaki ficz up in middle school ＞︿＜!! sooo,, here we go!!! hopefully this is ok,, many apologies for how short it iz aauwgwhwh

this is the third time you've called him today, trying to reach out. the first two times, he had thought he was strong enough to ignore you.

he was wrong. the minute his phone rang out that third time, he practically scrambled over to it just to answer. pathetic.

"you haven't been at work for what,,, almost two weeks now?"

the concern in your voice makes johnathan want to keel over dead instantly– not like he's far from it anyways. he pulls his phone away as he lets out a weak cough. you barely hear it from your end of the call.

"...sick." is all he manages to rasp out, his sore throat preventing him from speaking further. even if he could manage to talk more, he wouldn't know what else to say. how would he tell you? the call ends prematurely. you know you're not going to get more out of him, and he knows that it's better to keep you in the dark about his situation.

to tell you about how his unrequited feelings have manifested into something much more than both of you can handle was completely and absolutely out of the question. how was he supposed to explain he had been coughing up your favourite flowers? johnathan would rather let it kill him.

not only was he humiliated by the sheer intensity of his yearning– he knew you'd end up feeling guilty about it. yet, a part of his heart ached, wishing that he was selfish enough to tell you. maybe seeing you cry over him would give him some semblance of love.

that was an awful thought. he promptly pushed it aside. he'd never want to make you cry.

he could only laugh at how frustrating his situation is. it was inescapable, his fate inevitable and ever nearing– and no one to tell.

he had never felt so alone.

at least i'll have flowers for my funeral, he thought in the deafening silence of his home, finding the energy to let out a weak chuckle over the thought.

–

a few days after the call, his phone buzzed, receiving a text from you:

i'm coming over'

straightforward, at least.

'what if you get sick?' he messages back, trying to generate excuses to keep you away.

you reply swiftly, before he can come up with anything else, unswayed by the idea of potentially catching his illness which, unbeknownst to you, wasn't really transferable anyways. 'we'll wear masks then. omw.'

lovely. you were stubborn as ever. at least you gave him a heads up.

he noticed you made no attempt to keep your distance from him as you dropped off his little care package.

all neatly put into a little basket was some fresh fruit you had insisted he needed, as you rambled over the importance of vitamin c and immune health, a sweet little card filled with "get better soon"s filled by his coworkers at alchemax most of which he knew probably didn't really care all that much, a few packages of cough drops you had been a sweetheart to actually choose ones which had bearable flavours, a blanket, a few snacks, and... flowers.

if you had known exactly what illness, he doubted this choice would have been made. he stared at them silently, finding some sort of humor in the mortifying irony.

-

you said an awkward goodbye at his door, about to turn around and head off– before hesitating for a second.

"johnathan?" the way you looked at him, eyes filled with tenderness and worry– maybe it wasn't so bad after all, for you to be the death of him.

"...yeah?"

you didn't say anything further, instead, choosing to communicate through impulsively squeezing him into a tight hug.

you pull away just as quick as it had happened, yet the warmth of your embrace lingered a little longer, even as you headed out the door. something about you caring so much made it hurt more.

johnathan wondered why you even cared, why you were so persistent about looking out for him– knowing that he'd end up watching you slip away from him again, leaving an ache in his heart nothing could remedy.

he couldn't blame you. not sweet, kind, thoughtful you. he was the idiot, the careless fool who yearned for something he couldn't have.

maybe in another life, he thought to himself.

[acefaun]

Kaeya~ The Curse

Synopsis: God!MC brings back a container of cleansing water from the pool they came across on their adventure with Dainsleif in the Chasm. They hoped to give it to Kaeya… But it seems as though they were a little too late to help. Hopefully they can make up for lost time.

⚔️Masterlist⚔️ Gender-neutral, God MC! ~Spoilers for Chasm Interlude Archon Quest after Liyue A/n: Popping into the Genshin fandom with a self-indulgent serving of my favorite Ragbros! 💕 I read a few fanfics about how Kaeya might have had a similar reaction to Dainsleif during the Archon Quest, so I decided to add my own bit to it with a little bit of the SAGAU aspect of MC being their ‘god’.

–Word Count: 2,800–

I had been gone from Mondstadt for too long, I mused as I took in the fresh air around me. Being in the Chasm for weeks on end made me cherish the feeling of the open air in Mondstadt. The free wind was so much less stifling than suppressive rocks.

Still, however grateful I was, one person remained on my mind on my trip home. The cool container that rested within a pouch against my leg reminded me that my mission wasn't over. On my recent adventure into the Chasm with Dainsleif, we found the ruins of an ancient civilization that the Abyss was using for another of their schemes. Their goal was to bring Khaenri’ah back, but we put a stop to their nefarious plot. 

While it would have been nice to see the ancient citizens of Khaenri’ah freed from their curse, it would have caused much more suffering and loss than done any actual good. There wasn't a chance that their plans would meet with surefire success, after all. In fact, I—along with Dainsleif—was certain their plan would fail spectacularly. I had Khaenrian friends to protect, and I would never take a chance playing with their lives. 

My fingers brushed against the cork of the bottle I carried. I wasn't that powerful, but even I could feel something comforting from the bottle. I couldn't imagine the discomfort and suffering that those cursed had to go through without a hint of relief. By having this water nearby, I hoped that Kaeya might feel some reprieve. 

Kaeya never divulged anything about himself to me, out of fear that I was the god from Celestia that sent his nation to ruin. So, I wasn’t entirely sure how Kaeya’s lineage really affected him, but it was better to be safe rather than sorry. Fortunately, each adventure I went on seemed to lead me to more answers that he probably didn't even know himself.

Still, I might have been overthinking things… After all, Kaeya was only a descendant of Khaenri’ah, he wasn’t there when it was destroyed. But that Abyssal scheme was terribly effective—even Dainsleif had to rely on me to resolve the situation. I had to prepare for the worst and hope for the best with Kaeya’s unknown situation.

It was early in the night when I walked through the gates of Mondstadt. Luckily, if all was as well as I hoped, I knew exactly where my friends would be gathered. 

I was grateful that, as soon as Dainsleif and I finished our quest, he understood the urgency with which I had to return home and check on my found family.

Opening the door to the Angel’s Share, it was unusually quiet, and my apprehension only grew. My eyebrows furrowed as I noted a few regulars, but there was no bard. There was no exasperated Diluc or rambunctious Kaeya. “Charles,” I asked, walking up to the bar. “What's the lull? Isn't it usually more lively here at night?”

“Your Excellency,” he addressed me formally. “Sorry. You must be looking for Master Diluc. He's visiting Master Jean tonight. You might be able to find him in her office.”

My eyebrows furrowed further. Something was wrong for the alcoholics to be missing and Diluc to be in the Knight's headquarters. I prayed I was jumping to the wrong conclusions… I couldn’t wait for an explanation. “Tell me what happened.”

He let out a brief sigh, his empathetic eyes landing on me. “I heard that Captain Kaeya fell ill. I wish I had more to tell you, but the Knights have been keeping things quiet since. No one really knows what happened yesterday-”

“Yesterday?” Then my suspicions were unfortunately correct. Kaeya was affected by the Abyss’s device, and no one was there with Kaeya to help or understand why he was suffering. Before Charles could give another word, I was flying out of the door. I was thankful the foot traffic was light as I raced up the stairs to get to HQ. 

The knights were quick to fling the doors open for me as soon as they recognized my intended path. Nearly crashing into Jean's office door, I flung it open, startling those inside. Jean immediately stood from her chair. “Your Excellency, you're here. There's been a problem-”

“With Kaeya,” I finished for her, my eyes flickering across the faces in the room. There was Jean, Diluc, Barbara, and Amber. They were no doubt all gathered there for the same reasons. But I needed them to cut to the chase. “I heard. Tell me everything.”

Jean gestured for Amber to tell the story from the beginning. Taking her cue without hesitation, Amber walked me through her version of what happened, “I was just returning from my patrol yesterday afternoon when I ran into Captain Kaeya. He looked… bothered; but I didn’t think he was feeling unwell or anything. I was about to ask him about it when he just… Well, I don’t know what really happened. He just looked like he was in so much pain; it was so bad, he looked like he couldn’t breathe and then couldn’t even stand on his feet.”

“We were thrown completely off guard,” Jean commented. Apparently it wasn't the most subtle thing. Many citizens panicked at the sight of the Captain in such agony and went straight to the Knights of Favonius to report the emergency. 

Barbara then added anxiously, “We tried our best to help and make it bearable, but nothing we did worked. We spent all night trying everything, well into the morning. Even with my hydro vision, I couldn’t seem to ease his symptoms. Eventually, we had to send for Master Diluc… We thought they might be at odds, but we were sure he might know something to help. I mean, something like that wouldn't just randomly happen, right?” 

Of course, she assumed it was some natural affliction. It wasn't poison, and it wasn't something they could heal with their church medicines. They had Kaeya’s situation all wrong, and Diluc didn't seem like he told them a word. 

Guilt weighed heavily on my shoulders. I tried to stop the Abyss Order as quickly as I could, but there were too many abyss mages for me to work swiftly and efficiently. Not to mention, Dainsleif was in agony and his friend was dying in front of him. Stopping the Abyss took far too long and drew too much attention to Kaeya. I could only imagine how long of a night it must have been for Kaeya to endure.

But what could Diluc have possibly done to help, anyway? This situation never happened before—and I would be sure it never happened again. None of what happened was precedented. With my gaze flickering to the apparently frustrated red-head, I paused, taking in his appearance. I knew he didn't enjoy working with the Knights of Favonius, but this particular agitation was new. It was time I got his side of the story. “Diluc… What did you-”

“I came to see him as soon as I was informed, and when I got here, they refused to let me in his room,” Diluc hissed, withholding so much wrath that it left me surprised.

Jean sighed, all of them looking awkwardly away from the angered man. She supplied me with an explanation, “At first we thought getting Diluc would be the best response. But… As soon as we had Kaeya inside of headquarters, he started shouting that he was burning. It wasn’t a fever, and he seemed like he wasn’t in his right mind. Knowing vaguely what happened between them, I made the last minute call to keep Diluc out. Your excellency, you have to understand… I did what I thought was best for Kaeya given the circumstances.”

“He could have been dying, and it was ‘for the best’ that I couldn't see him,” Diluc retorted. He didn't need the weak excuses of the Knights of Favonius, he wanted to make sure his brother was okay. He couldn't do that if they restricted him from going as far as the first floor.

“I disapprove of how you made the decision to keep Diluc out after so quickly inviting him to this mess.” I snapped at the group of knights in defense of Diluc. “What happened between them is in the past and had nothing to do with what happened to Kaeya. Diluc,” my steely gaze softened as I met Diluc’s eyes of adoration. Of course, he knew I would understand everything. I would take his side. I offered to him, “Come with me. We're going to go check on Kaeya. I came to help.”

“Thank you.” He didn’t hesitate to follow me out of the quiet room. Everyone else meekly remained where they were for just getting scolded by me. Still, I had trouble waiting for Diluc as I practically rushed to leave Jean’s office. 

“Captain! Captain Kaeya, please go back to your room! You're not-” The knight that was chasing Kaeya down the stairs, faltered at seeing me. “You're Excellency! I'm sorry! Captain Kaeya shouldn't have slipped past us! Ah!” The Knight panicked as Kaeya immediately flung his arms around me, his larger frame almost overtaking me. “C- Captain, please, that's their Excellency you just-”

“(Name)!” My eyes widened at hearing Kaeya call my name. Hardly anyone ever used my name. Everyone respected me, feared me, cherished me, adored me. Using my name was disrespectful, something frowned upon. But I loved hearing it from them. I loved when they used my name and not some impersonal title.

“Kaeya,” I replied with his name, in turn, my hands resting on his back.

“It feels nice…” Kaeya muttered, his arms tightened around me, holding me closer. “I felt when you got to Mondstadt. You felt different from usual, but I needed to find you. Please, let me hold you. It doesn't hurt anymore.”

“We're going home, Kaeya,” I hushed, trying to soothe him as best I could. I knew the water I had with me was really what was drawing him to me like this. But for now, I wanted to make up for not being faster. Just like Dainsleif, even Kaeya would need time to recover from the strain his body was put through. “Diluc’s going to take us back to the manor, and we'll take care of you.” Similarly to how his grip tightened around me, I pulled him closer, my fingers sinking into his unkempt hair. “I'm sorry… I'm so sorry.” 

He hummed, but he couldn't bring himself to say anything more as he basked in the presence of the cleansing water. Though the effects of what happened lingered in his system, he was feeling better just by being with me. He knew I was his god.

Diluc hesitantly pressed closer, despite the eyes of onlookers that were judging us. “If the manor is where you want to go, I suggest we depart. Kaeya, can you walk?” 

Kaeya could—he just bounded down the stairs for me—but he'd never make it as far as Dawn Winery. Awkwardly, I mentioned, “I'm agile, but I'm a bit of a limp noodle when it comes to weights. I'm afraid you'll have to carry him, Diluc. He’s been through a lot.” Reaching for the pouch at my side, I untied the strings and held the bag out to Diluc. “You can hold on to this for now. I have one for you when we get home. It'll help him feel better.” 

I didn't explain much just yet as Kaeya was carefully lifted, and he relaxed into Diluc’s arms. No one dared to question or stop me as I left with the two brothers accompanying me. I wasn't necessarily leaving because of the way Diluc had been treated. I was leaving purely because of the confidential matter that only involved the three of us.

Taking us to the teleport point, the journey home was short, and we took our time to get relaxed in Kaeya’s room, where he passed out almost immediately. It was the first time he was almost entirely free of pain since the incident. 

“If I may ask,” Diluc started slowly, his hands grazing over the pouch you gave him with the concealed bottle inside. “What exactly is this?”

Diluc knew mostly everything about Kaeya—who he was, where he was from, why he was in Mondstadt. He also knew Kaeya as a brother, which was where we were now. He wanted his brother to be okay and as annoying as usual, not bedridden.

As promised, they deserved answers. So, I began my summarized explanation of events, “I went on a mission recently against the Abyss Order. They… tried to revive Khaenri'ah against my warnings of what would happen. They were determined to cleanse the Khaenrians of their curse. However, all that resulted was suffering. Every living soul with that curse was in unbearable agony. It could have been devastating if I hadn’t gotten there in time.” My downcast eyes landed on the gentle rise and fall of Kaeya’s chest. “Even a nation away, he probably thought he was dying. I could only do my best to fix it as quickly as possible—but I wasn't strong enough to take care of them as fast as I wanted to. Who knows how long Kaeya was suffering because of me…”

“But you took care of them,” Diluc reminded me, knowing I would no sooner fall into self-loathing. “You did good against a powerful enemy. You should be proud. Whatever this water is… you managed to bring it here to help him. Don't think what you did wasn't adequate.”

Pursing my lips together, I knew better than to argue. He would only try to make me take it back. Diluc cared much more than he let on. He wouldn't let me shoulder the guilt. So, rather than dwelling on that, I changed the subject back to the pouch. “I forgot, I brought a bottle for you as well. However, I mean to go back and collect more for you to store in the Winery in case of emergencies like that one.” Taking the pouch back, I opened it, pulling out the glass bottle of cleansing water. “This was in an ancient city. Apparently, it acts as a cleansing water, soothing the effects of the curse. It won't cure him, so it does no good to drink it. But having it near will help.” 

“Cleansing water,” Diluc repeated, observing the seemingly normal water that I held. It was strange that Kaeya couldn't even tell what he was attracted to when he found me in HQ. From what Diluc could tell, Kaeya could simply sense the water from that far away. “It's fascinating. I'm sure we'll have to keep a greater supply. I… feel like I should ask how you came to know that this water would help him when it looks and feels like normal water to those without the curse.”

“Because that fountain was where the cursed went to meet a peaceful end,” I replied quietly, avoiding mentioning my travel partner. In truth, I probably wouldn’t have suspected what the effects of this water truly were if not for Dainsleif’s explanation. “It seems sad, but this water is truly the only thing that seems to be able to give some respite.”

Diluc hummed, his eyes now searching Kaeya and wondering when his sad end would come. Luckily, he wouldn't have to suffer so much anymore thanks to my efforts. Diluc watched how I delicately traced Kaeya’s still hands, my eyes overflowing with guilt. “You did your best. I wish you'd be kinder to yourself.”

I hummed, but I didn't agree or disagree with him. “I'm not finished with my mission against the Abyss… but… I'm not leaving Kaeya right now. You can stay too. Mondstadt can do without their Darknight Hero for a while. Kaeya needs us more than they do.” Kaeya deserved to be coddled after his horrible experience. I'd do my damned best to ensure it never happened again.

[lady-pug]

In Sickness And In Health - In Sickness

Summary: The kid fell ill while Din is away and you feel absolutely hopeless trying to help him, but nothing seems to work. You get progressively more worried the more he cries, and it's driving you insane. Hopefully Din will get back soon.

Pairing: Din Djarin x Reader

Word count: 3,8k

Warnings: description of sickness (also Grogu throws up), small injuries (scratches)

Notes: this one is actually a two-shot, in which both parts complement each other. This was a fun one to write. Do keep in mind that Grogu is sick in this one, so there are descriptions of feeling ill and throwing up (so if this is something that makes you uncomfortable please feel free to skip ahead). As always, if you spot any mistakes, please feel free to warn me and I'll correct it right away, and feedback is always welcome and appreciated. I hope you enjoy this one!

Reader’s gender not specified.

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Crying. That’s all you could hear and all your mind could focus on. You even felt like crying yourself. The kid had been desperately wailing for hours already and no matter what you did he wouldn’t stop. 

Din had been gone for almost two days now, away gathering information that could be useful in finding the kid’s people. While you had originally wanted to go with him, he had deemed the place and the people he was meeting too dangerous for the kid, and asked that you stay on the Crest and look after him while he was gone (“Just like the good old days, huh?” you had joked, to which Din answered with a brief chuckle).

Almost immediately after Din had left the kid started growing fussy. You hadn’t given it too much thought as it was pretty normal behavior for him everytime his guardian left, missing him as much as you did, and had tried to distract him with some coloring and some food. Your suspicion that something was indeed wrong started to arise when the kid refused to eat the jerky you offered him, and continued whimpering. After all, this little boy loved food almost more than anything. You decided that maybe a nap would make him feel better and put him in his little hammock above Din’s bunk, where he fell asleep almost immediately.

The silence on the ship lasted only a few hours, which you had used to fix some wiring under the navigation controls, before the kid woke up wailing. You scrambled from under the controls, almost hitting your head in the process, and ran to the hull to check on him. Once you opened the bunk’s door the sight before you made your heart clench with concern.

The kid was bawling his eyes out, the little hammock swinging back and forth with the force of his sobs, his skin a paler shade of green, almost grayish. 

“Oh, my love” you picked him up gently, but his squirming nearly made you drop him, so you cradled him a little more firmly “What’s wrong?”

His little robe felt wet under your palms, his skin damp with sweat. You gently laid the back of your hand on his forehead, confirming that he was indeed quite warm.

“You’re ill, is that what’s bothering you?” you cooed at him, trying to calm him down “Let’s see how we can make you feel better, yes?”

You took him back to the cabinet that served as a kitchen pantry.

“When I was little, old lady Aola often took care of me when I was sick. She would help Porcellus make this amazing cream of womp rat soup that would get me back on my feet in no time.” you sat him down on a counter, his crying never ceasing “Let’s see if we can improvise something similar for you.”

Improvise, as it turned out, was a huge understatement. It was quite hard to store fresh food on the Razor Crest, so you and Din mainly kept canned essentials and food that could be frozen and subsequently defrosted. The rare times you managed to come across fresh goods, they were quickly consumed before they could spoil. Therefore you found out you didn’t have the main ingredient to make soup for the kid: womp rat meat.

“Okay, not to worry, we can figure something out, right kid?”

You didn’t receive a response, the little boy only kept on crying. The more he sobbed, the more distressed you felt, fumbling with the ingredients to finish the soup quicker. More than once his crying spiked a little louder, almost making you chop a finger off. 

“There we go” you said once you finished, pouring some of the soup on a tiny bowl for him “You’ll start to get better after you eat.”

Once the soup had cooled off a little you handed him the bowl and turned back to get some for yourself. What you did not expect, however, was for the kid to grow even more fussy, screaming even louder, and use his magic powers to send the entire pan flying towards you.

“Maker, kid!” you yelped, the soup burning your skin even through your clothes as it ran down the front of your shirt. Some had splashed on your exposed arms, the skin there starting to redden.

That seemed to calm him down somewhat. In between hiccups, the little boy started giggling.

“Yeah, this’ what does it, huh?” he laughed even more at the pained grimace on your face “Laugh at my misery, kid, and see what happens.” you smirked at him, no malice behind it.

You went back to your cot to grab a somewhat clean shirt to replace the one soaking with soup. You winced as you tried to peel it off, the course material sticking to your injured skin. Once you were presentable you went back to the kid to find him quietly sipping his soup.

“Feeling better now that you let it all out of your system?” you asked him, to which he only gurgled in response.

After cleaning up the mess the kid had made while he finished eating you decided to check his temperature. Placing your palm against his head, you noticed that he felt even warmer than before. 

“This doesn’t feel good.” 

Grabbing the ship’s medkit you retrieved the infrared thermometer, but not before noticing a single stimshot sitting there. You stared at the small green item at the bottom of the kit, pondering your next steps. You were hesitant about using it, not knowing anything about the kid’s species and how his system would react to the stim. Besides, the dose was designed for adults. Maker, it was strong enough to use on a wookie, what would happen if you gave it to a baby? I’ll leave it as a last resort, you decided.

The number displayed on the thermometer was high, but you couldn’t tell exactly how high for the kid’s standards. 

“I guess we’ll just have to monitor your fever.” you smiled down at him, realizing his eyes were getting a little droopy “How about we give you a nice, lukewarm bath and put you down to sleep, what do you say?”

Compared to his fussiness from earlier, the kid was incredibly calm while you washed and dried him. He was practically asleep by the time you put him down on his hammock again.

You decided a cold shower would do you good. Upon closer inspection, now that you weren’t in such a rush, the skin of your chest and stomach was quite red. There were even some small blisters where the hot soup had come in direct contact with the skin of your arms. If you remembered correctly, there wasn’t much bacta left so you decided against using it, as Din could need it once he was back. The cold water helped soothe the burns.

Hopping out of the shower you sat down on your cot with a datapad to do some research. Surely someone on the holonet knew something about a species with green skin and big pointy ears, right? But you came back empty handed, as not a single mention to anything similar to the kid’s kind could be found. You quickly changed your approach and settled upon browsing through blogs with tips for first-time parents on how to take care of ill babies. A few tips were actually pretty useful.

This whole day had been very exhausting and had left you completely drained. Checking the chrono you realized it was starting to get dark outside. After checking on the kid one last time, you decided to go to bed early.

You managed to get only a couple of hours of shuteye before you jolted back to consciousness by the kid screaming bloody murder. 

“Oh, no.” you groaned tiredly as you got up to tend to him “I’m coming, my love.” you whispered even though he clearly couldn’t hear you.

When you opened the door to Din’s bunk you panicked for a second not seeing the baby on his hammock. Instead you found him lying on his back on Din’s bed, his little arms swinging in the air as if he couldn’t get up.

“Oh, kid, what happened?!” you asked as you picked him up and cradled him close to your chest. A second later you stiffened, and if you could facepalm you would: it was pretty obvious, he must have squirmed too much and fallen from his hammock. You were so tired you were starting to lose your coherence.

The kid gripped the front of your shirt with all his might and nuzzled into your collarbone, his crying quieting a little but never stopping. You placed the back of your hand on his forehead.

“You’re still hot.”

You fumbled with the thermometer, almost dropping it in the process and measured his temperature. It was practically the same as the last time you checked. 

“At least it’s not going up.” 

You started walking around the hull bouncing him in your arms, trying to get him to settle down again. You tried shushing him, humming quietly, singing a lullaby. You were so desperate to help him however you could that you even went as far as putting a bucket over your head and impersonating Din to see if that would calm him down.

“I can bring you in warm” you said, your voice forcedly deeper and lower “or I can bring you in cold.”

That makes him blow a quiet tiny giggle between hiccups, but otherwise did not stop his crying.

“I don’t know what to do.” you whimpered, frustrated tears brimming in your eyes “How can I help you?” 

The kid kept on crying for a few more minutes before he stopped all of a sudden. You looked at him quizzically and for a moment you hoped, you prayed that this was it. Before you could even react he gurgled and puked all over the front of your shirt.

“Of course.” you sighed.

That seemed to do it for him, apparently having been woken up by a sore stomach. He instantly quieted down.

“Let’s see if you can keep something else down.” there you went to prepare him more food. Now with a full stomach again you put him down to sleep again, this time directly on Din’s bed so he wouldn’t fall off and hurt himself, and headed to the shower. Again. Then you went to bed. Again.

This went on for two days: every few hours the kid would wake up wailing, you would tend to him and more often than not you would have to get back to the shower. It got to the point where you had no more clean shirts and had resorted to hunting for one of Din’s to wear. His fever was not going down, but at least it wasn’t going up (or that’s what you kept telling yourself). By the beginning of the first afternoon you gave up trying to sleep, running exclusively on caf and willpower (which, to be fair, was dimming every passing moment you stayed awake a little longer). You were practically swaying on your feet. 

You were adamant on not using the stim, too scared of doing more harm than good. Instead you’ve been trying to bring him back to full health with only soup and lukewarm baths and lots of water and rest, but that was not seeming to do the trick.

You briefly considered calling Din on the comm he had, but it was for emergencies only. But wasn’t this an emergency? You were hesitant on calling him and worrying him when he was so far away, or worse, possibly giving away his position in a vulnerable moment. So you resorted to doing this on your own.

The kid had just quieted down in your arms, nuzzling further into your embrace. You let yourself hope for just a moment that he was finally going to get better. After settling him down on Din’s bed, you sat down on your own cot to try and read some manuals on the Razor Crest’s navigation system and hopefully learn how to properly fly the ship just in case. The kid was the quietest he ever was this past couple of days, his nap lasting a lot longer than before. Thank the Maker, you sighed in relief. Even though your eyelids were getting heavier by the second, you forced yourself to stay awake just a while longer. He might need me, you argued, I need to be ready. Just in case this isn’t over, I need to be there for him if he-

You were harshly woken by a piercing scream and the floor vibrating. Disorientated, you checked the chrono and cursed as you realized a few hours had gone by since you put the kid down to sleep. Kriff, I must have dozed off.

Standing up on unsteady feet you felt the whole ship shaking. Reaching for the bunk, you slid the door open to find the kid screaming his little lungs out, his little arms flailing around. He must be the one making the ship move with his powers.

“Hey kid, what’s wrong?” you asked, reaching to check his forehead “Kriff, you’re burning up!”

Grabbing the thermometer, you measured his temperature. It was high, a lot higher than it was before. You silently cursed yourself for falling asleep, having missed when his temperature started to rise.

“Oh, Maker, kid.” your eyes started stinging from unshed tears “I’m so sorry, I should have been taking better care of you, I’m-”

A sob got stuck in your throat. You were absolutely desperate and also so frustrated with your inability to make the kid feel better, what would Din say if he saw you now? This was why he brought you along, one of the reasons he hired you in the first place, what would he think of you if you couldn’t even do your job right? And the kid! He was hurting, that absolutely broke your heart, and there was nothing you could do but hopelessly watch. And you were so very tired.

No.  

You refused to give up yet. The kid needed you. He needed you and you were the only one who could take care of him now.

With newfound determination, you cleaned your face where a few traitorous tears had slipped down your cheeks and grabbed the medkit. You were going to use the stimshot. After retrieving a small blade from Din’s weapon stash and an empty cup, you scooped the baby up in your arms before sitting on the ground in the middle of the hull.

Using the sharp blade, you carved a tiny hole on the tip of the pneumatic dispenser that held the stimulant, just enough to be able to pour most of the liquid inside the cup, without damaging the pumping mechanism. With just a small dose inside the syringe, you held onto the kid and tried raising one of his sleeves.

When he finally caught on to what you were doing, he screamed and cried even more desperately than before, wiggling in your arms trying to get away. All of a sudden white hot stinging pain erupted in your arms, as the kid quite literally tried to claw his way out of your grasp, prompting you to hold him even tighter, while also trying not to hurt him in the process.

“I know, I know, love” you huffed, your voice strained with pain “but this is for your own good.” you ended your sentence and immediately plunged the syringe in his little arm. 

He screamed, your heart breaking for him, but as the medicine was pumped into his bloodstream he slowly calmed down. 

“Okay, this seems to have worked.” you sighed “Let’s check, shall we?”

The thermometer said that his temperature was indeed going down. Waiting a few minutes you checked again and again, realizing it had indeed lowered quite a bit, but had eventually stagnated on a temperature still high enough to be considered a fever.

“I’m going to have to do this again, alright kid?” he cooed in response, his eyes starting to shut from exhaustion “I’m sorry.”

You very carefully poured another small dose back inside the dispenser and administered it in his arm again, him barely squealing. After checking his temperature again just to be sure you realized it had lowered and he was safe again. He settled in your arms, nuzzling into your collarbone, and instantly fell asleep.

With the kid still in your arms, you carefully scooted back to near Din’s bunk, but you had no strength left in you to actually get up and set him in bed. Instead you just slumped against the wall, your head tilted back as you let out a sigh. A sigh turned into two, which turned into small hiccups, which in turn turned into full blown sobbing. Your whole body shook with the intensity of it, tears of frustration and of tiredness steadily falling and accumulating on the back of your hand where you were biting into in order not to let out any sounds that could potentially wake him up.

You looked down at the green child in your arms, his face so peaceful, if only slightly paler than usual, and smiled softly at him. The sight of him no longer distressed was enough to calm you. Without even attempting to clean the tear tracks from your face, you slumped fully into the wall, letting a much overdue slumber overtake you.

Din slowly made his way back to the Crest, almost dragging his feet. Obviously, the man he had sought out to meet had required him to do some maker awful task to, in the end, not even have the information he asked for.

“Jedi are hard to find these days, Mando. Even harder than mandalorians.” he had said, which made Din clench his fists really hard in order not to just beat the guy to a pulp. But that actually made him stop and rethink his actions. 

With the stunt this weirdo just pulled, he realized he couldn’t trust just anyone in the galaxy. No one other than mandalorians. While, yes, mandalorians were hard to come across nowadays, especially after The Great Purge of Mandalore, maybe they could help find a Jedi somewhere, as mandalorians tended to have lots of important connections all over the galaxy (it saddened him to think that he could no longer rely on his Tribe as he didn’t know where most of them were, and it saddened him even more to admit it was his fault they were scattered around).

So, while very tired and desperate for a shower and to hop into bed, he was very eager to get home to you and the kid and tell you all about his new plan, to search for mandalorians. He already had an idea where to start. Wait. Home. Since when had he begun associating the Crest with home? Before it was just ‘the ship’. Now though…

When the ship came to view he sighed in relief and content. While the ramp lowered, however, he started getting a weird feeling in his chest, that something wasn’t quite right. Stepping inside the Crest only made his worry grow: the hull was a mess, it honestly looked like a hurricane had swept over the place and, worst of all, his weapons cabinet was open. And the place was quiet; it wasn’t usually this quiet in the middle of the day with an over energetic kid around.

He unholstered his blaster and carefully walked around looking for you. He didn’t have to search for long: near his bunk, a few steps away from a mess of things (a blade of his, he noted, next to a spilled over cup of a viscous green fluid), you were slumped against the wall, your knees bent close to your chest, slightly falling to one side, with your head hung down.

Din rushed forward and cupped your cheeks, checking you over for any injuries. The first thing he noticed was that the bags under your eyes looked slightly more pronounced, making your face look more hollow. Then he noticed the scratches on your forearms, blood beginning to dry, accompanied by small blisters. His face scrunched up in worry and anger as he wondered what had happened while he was away, while he wasn’t here to protect you. His fussing over you made you stir.

“Hm, Din?” you asked in a small voice, your eyes cracking open to look at him.

“Hey, Cyar’ika.” he almost whispered back “It’s me. Who did this to you?”

“Wha’…?”

“Who did this” he gripped one of your arms carefully “to you?”

“The kid.” 

That made him still completely.

“The kid?”

“He was ill.”

Only then did he notice the small green lump resting between your torso and knees, carefully cradled against your chest, snoring softly. That’s when it clicked. The kid had probably kept you awake and on your feet for a while looking after him. He probably got fussy and accidentally hurt you while you were trying to take care of him.

“Oh, Cyar’ika. When was the last time you had a proper night of sleep?” 

“Dunno.” your words were slurred “Before you left, I guess.”

Even if you couldn’t see it, his brows furrowed in concern.

“Why didn’t you call me? I would have come back.”

“He needed me.” you said decisively, before rambling almost self-consciously “You were busy, didn’t wan’ worry you. I-” you sighed and gave up trying to explain “He needed me.”

He felt his heart swell on his chest. You exhausted yourself because you put the kid’s safety and well-being, and his own peace of mind, over your own needs. The love he felt for you only grew even more.

“Come on” he said while sliding an arm under your knees and the other behind your back, your head resting on his chestplate “Let’s get you to bed.”

While he carefully laid you down he took note of your attire, his cheeks warming when he realized you were wearing one of his shirts, sleeves rolled halfway up your injured forearms (what can he say, he found forearms of any kind very attractive).

You rolled in your side, your eyes focusing on your surroundings.

“This isn’t my bed.”

“No,” he said, sweeping a stray strand of hair away from your eyes “it’s mine.”

“But-”

“No buts. Sleep.”

You sighed contentedly, snuggling the kid close to your chest, falling asleep almost instantly.

Din stared at the sight before him, a shy smile hanging on his lips under the helmet: you, curled up on his bunk, holding the kid close. It warmed his chest inside.

Yeah, he thought. He was home.

[thewhumpcaretaker]

◈━ 𝑶𝑪: 𝑱𝒆𝒏𝒔 𝑽𝒊𝒅𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒏 ━◈

◈━ Cosmic Horror & Liminal Horror Whumpee ━◈

Image Sources: 1 2 3 4 5

◈━ He/him | 32 | Icelandic ━◈

Current Residence: England, near the coast of the Irish Sea.

Occupation: Marine Paleontology Researcher for for GIEI - Glacial Ice Excavation Institute

Sexuality: Greysexual, Can't figure out if he's straight or pan because his sex drive is so low (he's pan)

Physical description: Jens has messy, dark hair that he sweeps back over the top of his head. He has square glasses and green eyes.

Backstory: Jens Vídalín grew up in a seaside suburban home in Iceland. After a brief disappearance during his childhood, he returned with amnesia, nightmares, and a fainting sickness that kept him out of school. He had to be homeschooled, but his parents were not very attentive and didn't involve him in groups so he lived in isolation for long periods of time. Prolonged isolation terrifies him now - a fact that he hid from his superiors when applying to work on GIEI's latest project in Antarctica with a small team of excavators.

Skills and Interests: Jens is a genius in the sense of having a remarkable memory for facts and high spatial awareness. He does not strictly "enjoy" solving puzzles - a difficult puzzle tends to make him feel trapped and frustrated, but he's unable to let it go. He studies early life forms and holds a particular interest in the development of aquatic brains. Privately, he holds an interest in psychology, poetry, and dream interpretation. He also likes animals, especially fish of course.

Personality: Jens is sweet to those who manage to get his attention, but a little lost in his own world - sometimes even to the extent of paranoia and losing grip on reality. Many people see him as self-absorbed. He's deathly serious and rarely smiles. He searches desperately for answers to avoid the possibility that there is simply no rhyme or reason to what happened to him. He's determined to do anything it takes to learn the truth, and a little amoral in that pursuit.

Desires: Someone to listen to him. Someone who will work alongside him and trust him. Above all, answers.

Hates: Jens has little patience for frivolity, unintelligence, and gossip. He dislikes those who pry into his private life. He especially hates those who question his perception of reality. If you want to really piss him off, put forward a theory of what happened to him as a child as if you know better than he does.

Body and Health: Jens has always struggled with poor health. The illness he developed after his disappearance causes headaches and sudden fainting, but doctors cannot identify the cause. It doesn't help that he is nervous and prone to panic attacks. But, his symptoms are as mild as they've ever been when he applies for the trip to Antarctica, so he's allowed to go. Hopefully they'll stay that way...?

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Author's Note: This is my first ever public, non-fandom OC! I'm really eager to write about him. His corresponding caretaker is coming soon. Asks are encouraged, I'm so excited!!!

[loversj0y]

HELLO! first of all, i TOTALLY adore your fics, and i LOVE reading them, and i really love your writing style! i was wondering if u can do a fic of wilbur and reader having cystic fibrosis? it's a lung disease, and ya know.. i have it, it could be based off of taylor swift's song "Soon You'll Get Better." i was reading your fics and they bring so much comfort, that's one of the reasons why i adore them! KEEP WRITING, NEVER STOP DOING WHAT YOU LOVE!!!! i support it!✨️✨️✨️💗💗

soon you'll get better

event masterlist

pairing: wilbur soot x gn! cystic fibrosis! reader

tws: hospitals, illness, brief death mention, hypochondria

notes: this one was a bit of a challenge but i did a lot of research on cystic fibrosis to hopefully get an accurate portrayal, but im sorry if it isnt! also i absolutely love this song, its devastating but so underrated imo

word count: 1.6k

taglist: @l0veb0mb1ng / @core-queen / @zooone / @lillylvjy / @melunnek

When you and Wilbur got together, you were quick to let him know about your Cystic Fibrosis. He was nervous, a consequence of not knowing much about it and his own hypochrondria. He never got totally used to it, the coughing and shortness of breath, especially on bad days. But he got better about it. He did so much research he almost seemed to know more about it than you did. He was alway particularly cautious with everything he learned, disinfecting the house as often as he could, always wearing a mask in public to protect himself. His biggest fear was getting you sick.

But illness wasn’t inevitable. In fact, it was something of a constant in your life. 

The first sign was the fatigue. It usually wasn’t good, but it was far worse today. You could barely leave bed, and Wilbur was immediately concerned. 

“Darling,” he asked softly as he came in with some soup he’d made you for lunch, “are you sure you’re alright?”

“I should be fine, Wil,” you smiled, sitting up and gently squeezing his hand, “Just a bit of a flare up. Thank you, darling.” 

He gently carded his hands through your hair and nodded, though he wasn’t totally satisfied with your answer. You weren’t totally able to stomach the soup, eating a few bites before feeling overly full. Wilbur tried to get you to eat more, but you couldn’t be bothered. He did help you get into a bath, which was wonderful since the steam helped ease your irritated sinuses and lungs, as well as your tired muscles. 

He helped you get out of the bath after, giving you a soft kiss on the forehead as he helped you into bed once more. He brought you your medicine as well, along with a glass of something orange. 

“What is this?” You chuckled softly, broken up by a bout of coughing. 

He bit his lip out of concern, handing your medicine and the glass to you once you’d calmed a bit. “It’s, uh, one of those immune drinks. Orange flavored. Figured it may help with the flare up.” 

You smiled softly, “That’s sweet of you. Thanks, love,” you took the glass and quickly took your meds, drinking the rest of the slightly sweet liquid to help ease Wilbur’s worries. It was a mostly quiet night, though broken up with coughing a bit harder than usual. 

It wasn’t a usual flare up. Two days later, and you were seeing a hyperactive version of Wilbur hypochrondria as he sat with you in the hospital. You were quite weak for a lot of the initial conversations, but you managed to catch a few quick words. Notably, ‘infection’, ‘treatment’, and some bacteria name that truthfully sounded like someone speaking another language. You put the pieces together easily. It wasn’t uncommon for you to get respiratory infections, especially when you were younger.

Wilbur handled it worse than you seemed to. When you came around fully, Wilbur was watching you. It was clear he hadn’t slept. 

“Hey, love,” you smiled softly, “fancy seein’ you here, eh?” You spoke around and tried to ignore the cannula in your nostrils.

He didn’t laugh. “How-” he cleared his throat, “How are you feeling? You,” he was tense as he spoke, clearly uncomfortable by the hospital lighting raining over you both, “You’ve been out for a day and a half.”

You sighed, and your response was cut off before it began by a round of coughing so hard it felt like your lungs were trying to escape you. “Believe it or not,” you hummed out weakly, trying to clear your throat a bit, “Not the worst. Probably, on a scale of one to ten, a four or five.”

He sighed, and you took his hand, squeezing it tightly, “I’m alright, love. This has happened before.”

“Is it alright?” He almost whined, “Darling, the doctor said if we’d waited any longer to get you here, it could’ve been deadly. You could’ve died if I didn’t decide to stay home that day. You could still die if the bacteira doesn’t clear out fast enough, I-” he was breathing quickly, clearly panicking.

“Hey, hey, Wilbur,” you held his hand a bit tighter, trying to sit up and pull him close. Once you tried to move, it was like he snapped into action, moving his chair closer and keeping you from sitting up. You coughed, a bit lighter now, and he frowned again, holding your hand once more.

“Don’t move around too much, please. You need to save your energy.” “God, Wilbur, come on. I’ll be alright. I know you’re worried, but this is new for you. This is not new for me. I know it’s serious, but I promise you, I’ll be okay. I’m stronger than I look.”

Wilbur looked at you like you were delusional, but he didn’t respond. You reached your hand forward, lightly fixing his hair.

“You haven’t been taking care of yourself,” you noted, gently placing your hand on his cheek.

He chuckled sardonically, “You are possibly the only person who would literally be hospitalized and worry more about me instead.”

You smiled fondly, “I’m used to all this,” you gestured at yourself and the hospital equipment scattered around you, “I’m also used to being there for you. And that’s not changing just because I’m here. C’mon,” you shifted, and Wilbur whined, standing and trying to help you.

“What are you doing, darling? Let me help.”

“I want to scoot over,” you shifted again, another round of coughing hitting you strongly, “‘n give you space to lay here with me.”

“You shouldn’t-” he sighed, not even really bothering to continue arguing. He moved his arms under you, gently moving you over, “I’m not supposed to be in there with you. The nurses-”

“I don’t care what the nurses say. I’m the ill one, so they have to let me do what I want. Now, come here. I want to hold you.”

He chuckled softly, carefully lying down next to you. He was a bit too tall for the bed, feet hanging off ever so slightly. But regardless, you curled up against his side, kissing his chest lightly. 

“I know you’re scared for me,” you spoke quietly, “but I promise you, it’s just a bad deal. I’ll be out sooner than you think.”

He nodded softly, kissing the top of your head. He managed to fall asleep a few minutes later, and you went with him. 

You were not out “sooner than you’d think”. It took a week before you were released. It was a grim week, doctors telling you about “Pseudomonas aeruginosa” and trying different things, from oxygen masks to humidifiers to loosen the mucus, to numerous medications. Wilbur wasn’t allowed to stay in bed with you the whole time, but he was always by your side.

“You know,” you’d told him one day, both of you eating some random cafeteria food, “I think when we get back home, we should paint the kitchen.”

“Oh, yeah?” He smiled, but the tenseness surrounding his opinion of hospitals and illness in general didn’t fade away, “What color?”

You smiled cheekily, “Well, now, hear me out. I’m thinkin’ like… a neon pink.”

He laughed, sputtering a bit, “Neon pink? Why?”

“I just think it’d be a good way to brighten our days. I mean, imagine,” you paused, coughs leaking into your words, “we wake up, it’s raining outside, right? We go to make coffee, and bam! Instead of a normal, boring kitchen, our days have gone from cold and gloomy to bright and exciting.”

He laughed a bit, gently playing with your hair, “Hm, maybe. We’ll consider it, once you’re back home.”

You smiled at the note of him acknowledging that you’d be coming home. 

That night you hadn’t been able to sleep, body wracked with coughing all night as nurses and doctors alike worked to try and find a solution.

The next day was better. Mid day, you sat halfway down the bed, Wilbur sitting behind you. He’d brought some hair products since you’d complained about how dry your hair felt from the hospital’s shampoo and conditioner. He carefully combed through your hair, helping apply a leave-in conditioner to help your hair. A nurse walked in with your medication, but you smiled upon seeing her. She was one of the nicer nurses, went by the name Puffy. She never made Wilbur move out from bed, and you quickly preferred her to the other nurses. 

“Alright, it’s meds time, kiddo,” she joked lightly, bringing in your medication and a glass of water.

You reached for it, Wilbur briefly stopping his hair brushing. The medicine wasn’t hard to take, thankfully you’d gotten quite used to it over the years. She smiled, speaking while you took it.

“Last night was a scare for sure, but, you’re getting better. I suspect a few more days before they get you out of here.”

You smiled at her, “Hey, if we give it a bit longer, I could hit a new personal record.”

She laughed at that, but Wilbur clearly didn’t appreciate the joke, one hand coming to wrap around your lower waist. 

She left shortly after, but Wilbur didn’t move from his place against you. 

“You’ll get better,” he murmured softly, placing a gentle kiss on your head, “Soon, you’ll get better.” He kissed your head again, wrapping his arms further against you. You leaned back into him fully, sighing and letting yourself relax.

When you did get released from the hospital, Wilbur was there for everything. He got your medications, making sure he had a timer set for exactly when you needed to take the antibiotics. He took care of you every step of the way, making sure to be by your side. With his help, it wasn’t long before the infection cleared up, and his earlier words, his notion of getting better, were soon a reality.