#hopefully all of this is happening with both of them safe and alone somewhere peaceful

[quack-quack-snacks]

Time Will Tell - Chapter 1.26

My Time Will Tell Masterlist

My Cha Hyun-su Masterlist

My Navigation and Masterlist

The Time Will Tell Glossary

Warnings: N/A really Word Count: 1,318

prev | current | next

onto your clothes and didn’t even need to look down to see it was your two younger siblings. You wrapped your arms around them just as Jin-ok approached you and handed you your axe. “Take them somewhere safe and stay there. Protect them.”

You knew what she wasn’t saying because it’s what you were thinking as well. 

‘At all costs.’

So you grabbed Yeong-su’s hand while he grabbed Su-yeong’s and you tugged them over to the safest place you could think of.

It was only after an hour or so had passed, when the sun was starting to fade over the horizon and all the growls and howls and bangs had stopped, that you were found by Eun-yu when she came looking for you. After that, you immediately went off in search of Hyun-su only to find him sleeping against a filing cabinet in a secluded room. 

You watched as his chest rose and fell a few times just to give yourself some peace of mind before ultimately deciding to leave him alone for the night and get some sleep yourself after a quick shower.

You didn’t sleep for very long when Eun-yu somewhat drunkenly woke you up. 

“It’s story time! Don’t be a bum, come and hang out with us!” She whined and you laughed, reluctantly agreeing and listening to Gil-seop tell his scary story. You didn’t want to be rude to him or Eun-yu, but you were falling asleep more and more with each word. 

BANG!

The door to the daycare slammed open and you jolted awake with a yelp. Everyone had a similar reaction as they saw the unknown new man walk in and dash straight for the drained jar of Korean wine. He greedily ate scoop after scoop of the marinated berries at the bottom. Yi-kyung walked up behind him like a mother following her wandering child and sighed. 

“Who are you?” Mr. An demanded while holding up a metal pipe. 

“I think he’s a runaway soldier,” Yi-kyung explained her theory. 

The soldier pushed the jar away from him when he saw the mess it made on his hands and started mumbling incoherently before falling to his side and passing out. 

Everything seemed to blur as they took him into another room and everyone settled in for bed until you found yourself aimlessly wandering the dimly lit halls with a candle. Your side still hurt so it was more of just stumbling around while using the wall to help you, but you’d be damned if you woke someone up to help you have a midnight stroll. 

You’d be damned if the perfect person you could ask wasn’t sitting on the staircase you were walking straight towards. 

Hyun-su looked to be lost in his thoughts while staring at his wrist before you announced your presence with a small, “Hey.”

He looked up and his eyes widened at the sight of you. You stumbled over, using the rail of the stairs to help you as you ascended and sat a level above him, placing the candle you held between the two of you. “Hey,” he replied, a little too late for the conversation but you decided to ignore it in hopes of not embarrassing him. 

“You shouldn’t be alone without a buddy, you know,” you teased. “I’m walking around without a buddy because both my official and unofficial buddies are passed out, drunk, in the daycare.”

“Are you scared?” He asked you after a beat. 

You sighed, thinking about your answer before saying it. “I don’t think so. Not for myself, anyway. I’m more scared about what will happen to Yeong-su and Su-yeong, to be honest,” you shot him a non-committal smile. “Hopefully, when this is all over, they can go back to living a semi-normal life.”

“Do you… think there will be a time after this?” He questioned rather pessimistically with his head down. 

The silence went on for a while until you decided to break it with an attempt to lighten the mood. 

“Hey, give me your phone.”

“Huh? What? Why?” He asked in return and you flashed him a cheeky smile. 

“Just do it. Just for a minute,” you insisted. He reached into his pocket and placed the unlocked phone in your extended hand. “Thank you,” you expressed as you searched around before settling on the Contacts app. “How about after all this…” You spoke as you typed, sounding a little distracted before finishing. “You give me a call and we can meet up, yeah?” You handed the phone back to him with a shy grin. 

He took it back, staring at you for a moment before he glanced down at the cracked screen. There, he saw your name with a heart emoji written into his contacts. He was stunned, just staring at the phone until you gasped, remembering something and snatching the phone back out of his hands. 

“Oh! I forgot to put a picture in! Hold on,” you insisted as you opened up the camera and held it up, fixing your hair and wiping a stray drop of blood from your cheek. Then, you scooted closer to Hyun-su, who had been stating his thoughts at you in bewilderment and awe and held the phone up to take a picture. “Say cheeseeee!” You took the photo, smiling brightly at the phone, but when you looked at it your smile turned into a frown. “Hyun-su! You weren’t even looking at the camera!” You complained, turning to look at him and finding him already looking at you. 

He sneaked a glance at the photo and couldn’t help the stuttering of his heart when he saw it. You looked just absolutely gorgeous with your smile. Sure, he wasn’t looking at the camera - instead looking at you with the smallest hint of a smile on his lips - but it was 100% worth it for that joyful look on your face in the photo and the adorable pout you sported as you looked at him in real life. “It’s perfect.”

You felt your cheeks heat up at his soft tone and tried to huff it away as you started making it your contact photo. “I wish you would’ve looked at the camera though.”

He couldn’t help the warm feeling that grew in his chest, and he honestly didn’t really want to. When you handed the phone back to him, he spent a long moment just staring at the screen, admiring the way your smile was brighter than the phone itself. 

He only broke out of his trance when your pinkie suddenly interlocked with his. “What are you doing?”

Your lips shaped a shy smile and the sight tugged at his heartstrings. “You’re making a promise to me. Promise me you’ll call me when this has all cleared. Please.”

He couldn’t deny you when you sounded like that, so he minisculely tightened his grip around your pinkie. “I promise.”

He said it so softly you thought you would have fainted on the spot if his touch wasn’t grounding you. With your shy smile growing even shier, you pressed your thumbs together with a soft giggle and a whisper, “Promise.”

Neither of you truly knew what the feelings growing inside you between each other were, but neither of you wanted it to go away anytime soon.

[wisteriaiswriting]

I see you have requests open, I'd like to request a Carmilla x male! reader angst turned comfort.

Dating her for a few months and having an argument with her (something small) but due to stress and worry of the extermination due soon it escalates quickly and the reader ends up leaving their place ending up alone on extermination day. They discover Clara & Odetta caught outside during extermination and save their lives (with Carmilla absent for some reason) but the reader gets badly injured in the process, initially refusing their help to stay away from Carmilla.

ℝ𝕖𝕥𝕦𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘 ℍ𝕠𝕞𝕖

Words: 671

“I told you to stop moving everything,” Cementing her words by snatching the item held in your hand, placing it back where it was originally. “It’ll just waste time if we need to leave.”

“It’s one thing, how much does it really matter?”

“When they come down, every second counts…”

Honestly, you both knew she was right, but with how close the day was you were both stressed to the ends of hell.

“I guess so…”

“I guess? You almost ruin the plan that could save our lives and that's all you have to say, I guess?”

“If I’m truely that destructive I’ll leave,” Pausing your sentence to turn around and start walking off, “Don’t want to get you killed.”

You didn’t feel bothered to grab any of your belongings before leaving, not that she would let you after that arguement.

***

Lucifer, it’s been days since you���ve been Carmilla. Much more since the girls have shown their faces, but with the extermination happening in a few minutes it’s understandable. The price on her head is large enough, surely Clara and Odette have a fair price as well. You probably have one too, not that you’ll ever know what it actually is.

Pulled out of your thoughts by something golden shining from above, forcing yourself to turn away and not be blinded. When it had died down you looked back, only to be face to face with a mask heading straight towards you. Within seconds you’ve been shoved to the ground, losing your breath.

Something silver and shiny flashed in your sight before being slammed down, just missing your arm. Able to push the angel away quickly and harshly enough to the point they lose their grip on the weapon, allowing you to grab it. Which they didn’t seem aware of.

Trying to charge you again just for them to not get close, the end of the spear lodging itself into their chest. Their movements slowed before coming to a stop, pulling the spear up and out to continue on. Not before a yell caught your attention, turning to find two demons rushing away from a group of Angels.

Quickly noticing who they were, Clara and Odette. So you sprinted into action, taking the angels by surprise. Managing to take two down without any hassle, but the final three couldn’t miss you.

One slashed at your arm, connecting with the flesh. With their harsh movements it was able to slice through everything, unable to stop as the other two approached. Still keeping a tight grip on the stolen spear, allowing you to get in a few slashes and jabs of your own.

This was able to keep them at bay until the girls got back up on their feet, helping you scare them off. Hopefully away for good but likely to attack another unlucky sinner. Allowing you to collapse in peace, or as close as possible with the girls next to you.

Said girls were trying to pull you up and into somewhere safe, not in the open. As the minutes passed, they’ve given up on trying to physically move you. Instead turning to talking, slowly convincing you to get up and move so they could help you.

Not Carmilla, not anyone else. They will.

Which was your breaking point, slowly hauling yourself onto your feet. Both girls stood close in case you needed their help, guiding you through the city. Seemingly zoning out as when you regained your thoughts you stood infront of somewhere you rather not be at.

Carmilla’s house.

You left almost a week ago, and you didn’t feel ready to return. But you made a promise to the girls, they held your hand and shoulder as you entered. Luckily Carmilla wasn’t home right now so they spent that time caring for you. Stopping your bleeding and stabilising you.

The comfortable and familial aura stopped when you heard the front door slam shut. You know you need to confront and talk to her about this, but not right now.

[frontlinebicepsoftheninth]

going through my drafts and came upon my old crackpot theory that while the events of htn are set before ntn, gideon's narration is actually set after atn, like harrow somehow forgets the events of htn or maybe just asks what it was like for gideon right after the lobotomy and the series ends with gideon saying "well, God stood in your doorway and said, 'You've thrown up again, Harrowhark...'"

[writingtoforgetreality]

You’re A Winchester? (Castiel x Winchester!Reader)

Request: You are so sweet, is a little sister Winchester reader good? Like in her late 20s that is their sister from another world/dimension, but they don't have a sister in their world? And she is just trying to fit into their family but she is a good hunter? It can be with Cas Meg or both, whatever you are inspired to do :) (by @sourpatchspinster), [Supernatural-Masterlist]

Part Two

Summary: You woke up in the middle of nowhere. How the hell did you get here? The last thing you remembered was being in a motel room & all of a sudden, you found yourself lost with the worst headache ever. Who would have thought your life was about to be changed forever?

Words: 5,270

Warnings: takes place in season 15 bc I want “everyone” to be alive & happy, language (do I still have to mention this?), mentions of our dear friend Chuck, angst?, innocent reader (I don’t know what happened to me during my writing break tbh), not my fav piece but I loved the request so there you go, fluff, (possible second part?), (Y/E/C) = your eye color

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

Black. That was all you could see. Your head was killing you, it felt like someone tried to crush it with their bare hands. It took you a lot of strength but after a few attempts, you managed to open your eyes & were met with a blue sky. Huh…Did you fall asleep outside? No. WAIT?! Were you captured? No, you were just lying on the grass. Slowly, you got into a sitting position, looking around to figure out where in the hell you were. Unfortunately, your surroundings were unfamiliar. Taking deep breaths, you tried thinking logical for a second. The last thing you remembered was you sitting in a motel room, turning pages in an old diary your family left behind.

You had never met any of your family, growing up in a children’s home because…well, you had no idea if you were completely honest. Throughout the years, you had been to multiple foster families but in the end, you always ended up back at the children’s home. Not that you cared too much. It was not like you ever felt like you belonged with them anyway. On your 18th birthday, Sally, one of the employees, came into your room with a small package in her hand. That was the first time you had ever received a gift.

“It says I should give it to you today.” she handed you the small wrapped gift with a genuine smile on her face.

“What is it?” your curiosity got the best of you.

“Open up & see, I guess. I have no idea.” & with that she left you alone once again.

The day you got the diary was when you left the children’s home for good. You could not believe what you had read. Apparently, you did have a family. Or so it seemed. But why the hell had you never met them? And why the hell did it seem like your family suffered from psychological problems? Schizophrenia? To be honest, you did not care about that. The only thing that mattered to you was that it seemed like you had a father & two brothers out there somewhere. It looked like your mother had died a while ago…

~back to your confused ass self~

Being alone out in the middle of nowhere was not particularly comforting. What scared you even more was that you did not even have your stuff with you. Where was your diary? Your phone did not matter to you that much, neither did your clothes. It was not like you owned much to begin with. But that diary? That meant the world to you. Even after years of unsuccessful searching for your family, you never gave up. Because deep down, you knew you would come across them eventually.

Coming to a standing position, you dusted off the dirt that was on your clothes. A black car in the distance caught your attention. What was a car doing out here in the middle of nowhere? Maybe your kidnappers were driving it & brought you here? That thought let your heart race. Yet, you found yourself moving closer to the car. The closer you got, the more you could make out. Was that a ’67 Impala? Out here? And it looked like it was in great condition? If you had enough money you would buy a similar car & you sure would treat it the same way that the Impala’s owner did.

You risked a look inside the Impala, finding it relatively empty, but before you could spend much longer admiring it, you saw something silver in the corner of your eye. Was that a…door? Okay, yeah, you were definitely kidnapped. But not by professionals, that was for sure. Not the right time to joke? Okay, okay, right. Upon closer inspection, you noted that it was most likely a door to a bunker. Why you did not run right away, you were not sure. Something about this place felt like…home. Huh, weird. How could you be so anxious yet so at peace all at once? Only one way to find out. Oh boy, you would so regret this later.

Before you could think too much, your hand was moving towards the door, ready to push. Surprisingly, it was not locked. You had to push your entire weight against the door to keep it moving since it was so damn heavy. By now, your legs were moving on their own & all of a sudden you were standing inside a…bunker? There was not much to make out because your eyes had to adjust to the dark inside at first.

It sounded like footsteps were approaching fast but because of the echo in the bunker you could not quite tell where they were coming from. There was one thing you did notice, though, & it was the fact that there was more than one person coming your way. Fuck.

“HANDS IN THE AIR!” the click of a gun was followed after the loud voice. Obeying, you put your hands up even though you were sure nobody could see what you were doing anyway. It was still dark after all. Right this instance, light illuminated the room & you were stunned by how big the bunker was. Eyes wide, you looked around, only to find you were upstairs & the voice you heard was coming from beneath you. Gazing around, your eyes fell on two broad looking men, both of them pointing a gun at you. Fucking great. You should have run.

“DOWN. NOW.” the shorter one of the two yelled once again. Not wanting to mess with them, your legs moved towards the stairs & slowly you got down, not once letting your eyes move away from the man with the shorter hair. He seemed like the bigger threat. While the taller man looked scary as hell too, he held something behind his eyes that eased you a tiny bit more.

“Who are you & what are you doing here?” this time it was the taller man who spoke up & you had to take back your previous thought. He was scary as shit, especially with his voice sounding like he was up to no good.

“Um, I-I swear, I don’t know. I-“ but your attempts were cut short.

“Cut the bullshit right there. Did Chuck send you?”

“Chuck?” your eyebrows raised up, showing your genuine confusion.

“Dean, I don’t think she’s with Chuck.” the one with the longer hair mumbled. Dean? Huh. The name made you think of your lost diary again. You hoped you would find it eventually.

“Sit down & start talking.” he was not to be messed with so you followed both men further into the bunker until you reached a huge table. Choosing one of many chairs, you sat down but still eyed the guns that were no longer pointed at you but still very much a threat. The men each took a seat opposite of you, putting the guns on the table in front of them. At least they were not holding them anymore. You noticed you held your breath & again, started taking slower ones to calm yourself.

“I’m Sam & this is my brother Dean. We won’t hurt you, just…who are you?” what a coincidence. Brothers Sam & Dean. Were you dreaming? Of course, why did you not think of this sooner? It would make sense.

“My name’s (Y/N).” your voice was barely above a whisper & your eyes shot down to your lap, suddenly feeling small.

“(Y/N), okay. Well, (Y/N), um, why are you here?” Sam’s voice was a lot softer than at the beginning. Dean had not said anything else, he simply looked at you sternly, still thinking you were a threat. You did not even have weapons on you. Hell, you did not even know how to fight in the first place. But clearly they did not know that. Fuck it, if you were about to die then you could actually tell the truth, right? What did it matter? Your voice was quiet but loud enough so the boys could hear you.

“One moment I was reading through a dia- book & the next I wake up in the middle of nowhere with the worst headache ever. I saw the Impale parked outside & then found the door. I don’t know where I am, I don’t even know why I thought opening this damn door would be a good idea.” a slight chuckle was all you could muster right now. Hopefully they would believe you. When neither of them said anything for a few moments, you looked up & saw them eyeing each other, having a silent conversation.

“What book were you reading?” this time it was Dean but his voice was a lot kinder now. The boys knew you were not a supernatural being, the bunker was safe when it came to that & you would have not been able to enter otherwise. Yet, you were confused by his question? That was really all he cared about? Not the fact that you had no clue where you were or how you got here? Not wanting to anger him, you answered, looking him straight into the eyes.

“My dad’s diary. Nothing special, why?” a noise coming from the entrance made you look towards the door. There sure were quite a lot of people for being in the middle of nowhere. Your conversation was cut short when a voice spoke up.

“Sam! Dean! I salted & burned the bones! Case done! Well, Castiel helped me but he said he was proud of my work.” how could someone sound so excited about…burning bones? What the fuck?

“Jack did a good job today.” the other person spoke up. He was wearing a trench coat & his voice was deep, deeper than the others. Obviously, they had not noticed you yet but a look at Sam showed you how uncomfortable he was. At this point, you were more than confused. Salting & burning bones? Why did this sound familiar though? Shit. No way. Your dad’s diary was filled with salting & burning stuff. What was happening to you?

“Uh, guys…” Sam got up & approached the two men who were called Jack & Castiel. Somehow, your gaze fixed on the man in the trench coat. He looked good. Again, wrong timing, (Y/N). Get it together! Jack & Castiel saw you & their faces turned into confusion.

“Who’s that?” Jack asked, his voice did not scare you, he sounded sweet. He seemed like a kind person.

“Jack, Cas, this is (Y/N). She showed up in the bunker out of nowhere.” Dean eyed you once more before getting up himself. Frustration could be felt & you hated that you were the one causing it. Never was it your intention to cause trouble in their lives but it looked like you just did by opening that damn door.

“Could you all maybe sit down? It makes me nervous when you’re all pacing like that.” you were surprised by your own voice. Usually you were never one to intervene, especially not in a situation like this. But you were exhausted & all you wanted was just to get back to your motel & these were the only people who could help your right now. All eyes shot to you & to your surprise, they began walking towards the table. Sam & Dean, taking the seats opposite of you. Castiel sat down right next to you & you hated how your heart skipped a beat by this simple action. You did not even know this man, he could be a killer. Jack took the chair next to Castiel & Sam made it his job to explain your situation briefly. All you could do was listen, your hands fiddling in your lap, still somewhat anxious to be here.

“Cas? Isn’t there a way you could…I don’t know, check her memories?” Dean added right after Sam finished explaining. Your confused face shifted between the two men, not understanding a single word. How could a stranger help you with your memories?

“I could try. But I need your permission to do that.” while saying the last part, his eyes looked straight into your (Y/E/C) ones. Damn, his eyes. His head tilted slightly & it was only then when you registered that he had asked you a question & you simply stared at him.

“Um, permission for what?”

“To take a look at your memories & see what you remember. We could help you after that.” his voice was so casual, as if he had done this multiple times. To you, though, it sounded like he was crazy.

“Right. And you can do that because…?”

“Because I’m an angel of the Lord.” Castiel stated. A what of the what now? A short laugh escaped you. Not because you laughed at him but because you were shocked & confused.

“Cas…” Sam mumbled & put his head in his hands. That was something he had wanted to keep from you. He had a feeling you had no idea about the supernatural & he wanted to keep it like that.

“You can trust him, (Y/N).” Dean chimed in.

“Will it hurt?” not that you were scared of the pain, your pain tolerance was pretty high but on the other hand, he had just told you he was an angel.

“Only a little.” Cas gave you a reassuring smile & that was when you decided you would let him do it. Because, frankly, you did trust him. Even though he might have some sort of mental illness.

Sam, Dean & Jack left the room to give Castiel some time to prepare & to give you time to calm down. He could tell by the way your leg was bouncing that you were highly uncomfortable but he was not sure how to help. His idea was to get it done quickly & then to bring you back where you came from. Hopefully, you would not ask too many questions. He already gave too much away by saying he was an angel. Replaying your face when he had said it eased him a bit. You did not look convinced at all which was probably for the best.

“Try to breathe more evenly, it’ll help.” you could tell he was trying to make this easier for you but you just wanted to get it done.

“I’m ready, let’s do this, please.” the plea at the end was almost inaudible but Castiel could hear it anyway.

Your eyes closed as you saw Castiel approaching. His fingers touched your temples gently but the next thing you felt was a short but piercing pain shooting through your entire body. It only lasted a few seconds & the only words you could make out before you fell unconscious were “You’re a Winchester?”.

“What do you mean she’s a Winchester?” Dean asked with shock written all over his features.

“She’s related to us?” it was Sam, he took the information way better than his older brother.

“Your sister, to be exact.” Castiel paused briefly, waiting if one of the boys wanted to add anything. He took their silence as a sign of continuing. “Her father’s diary, the one she was reading before she got here, it was John’s.”

“Wait, wait, wait…WE have his diary. There’s no way she has it. Besides, we would know if we had a sister.” Dean gestured with his hands to get his point across. He had never seen you, you could not have stolen the book from them.

“You’re right. But in her world, she was the one owning it. In her world, you guys are her brothers.”

“In her world? What’s that supposed to mean?” Sam decided to join the conversation, now wanting answers himself.

“She’s from an alternate universe. I expect she was reading through a spell or something similar & somehow she got sucked into our reality. From what I’ve seen in her head, the portal closed itself behind her so if she has no idea how she opened it & got here…well, it could be hard to bring her back. Besides, I’m not so sure she wants to go back there…” Castiel’s voice got quieter at the end of his sentence.

“Why not?” Dean imagined himself in your situation & he would do anything to get back.

“It’s not really my place to tell, I believe.” & before Dean could argue any further, Jack came running into the room.

“(Y/N)’s awake.” to that everyone followed behind him to one of the many bedrooms the bunker had to offer.

You were tired but the pain had completely disappeared. No matter how hard you tried, you still could not remember how exactly you got here. The door creaked & you looked up to find Sam, Dean, Castiel & Jack entering the room. You were no longer scared. Probably because you were way too exhausted to care.

“So?” you spoke up after a few seconds of silence. Castiel stepped forward & took a seat at the end of the bed you were lying in. His ocean blue eyes looked you over, making sure you no longer were in any pain. You nodded at him to show you were fine & with that Castiel told you what he had seen. It was a lot to take in but your tired state simply made you nod at everything he explained.

“The thing is…We don’t know how to get you back.” Sam approached you slowly, took a seat in a chair next to your bed.

“Cas?” ignoring Sam’s statement, you only had one question on your mind. Back in your world, you had spent years looking for your family. For your brothers. The ones being in the same room with you right now. Also, when did you start calling Castiel by his nickname? When did that happen? His humming gave you enough confidence to continue.

“Are they alive back home?” you did not have to mention names for Castiel to know who you were referring to. His face turned into one of sadness & you knew the answer without him saying anything.

“I don’t wanna go back.” every ounce of uncertainty was gone, you knew it was fate that you were here with all of them now. The four men shared a look, having a silent conversation again. Dean nodded but left the room a second later.

“Don’t mind him, he just needs time to process.” Sam’s sympathetic smile relaxed you a bit. The bunker was nice, so was the fact that you practically met your brothers but you were not planning on staying with them. Dean’s reaction showed you why. They had lived their lives without knowing they had a sister. You, on the other hand, had known about your brothers for years & yet you did not feel the satisfaction you had so desperately hoped for after finally finding them.

“It’s fine, I’ll get going soon.” with that, you sat up straight & tried standing up. A wave of dizziness kept you from doing so. Castiel was at your side in an instant & guided you back down.

“You need to rest.” he told you.

“You’re not staying?” Jack’s voice erupted from the door. You had almost forgotten he was there too. Your eyes focused on him briefly before you looked back down again, a blush slowly making its way up  on your cheeks.

“It’s for the better. I’ll be fine.”

“(Y/N). You’re our sister. Doesn’t matter if you’re from here or from another world. You’re family. We just found each other, we won’t let you leave again.” Sam’s words made you tear up. He did not know you, yet he told you that you were family & he wanted you to stay. For the first time, you felt like you belonged somewhere & you were overthrown with emotions. Since Castiel was closest to you, he sat himself next to you, threw an arm over your shoulder & pulled you into his chest. Usually, you hated crying in front of people but right now you could not care less. Besides, being in Castiel’s embrace felt right. What was it about him? Neither of them left the room, all staying with you for as long as you needed. When you could not feel more tears flowing down your cheeks, you slowly removed yourself from Castiel, immediately missing the warmth of his body. If you were about to stay here, he would be trouble, you could feel it already. Sam, Castiel & Jack then left the room, telling you to get some more rest & to scream for one of them if you needed anything. Details could be discussed another time.

They were right, you needed sleep. Time to sort your thoughts. Maybe that was the reason why you entered the bunker in the first place. Why you were not concerned about them brutally killing you. After waking up, you were more comfortable with the idea of sticking around with the boys. Sam told you Dean would come around eventually & you just hoped he was right. Getting up, you paddled to the door, quietly opening it since you did not know how late it was. There was a long hallway that looked exactly the same, no matter what direction you were looking at. Distant voices could be heard so you followed them & prayed you would not get lost in that labyrinth of a bunker. You had to ask your brothers a question. Your brothers. It felt weird to call them that but they were, right? Back home, you had read through your dad’s diary about a thousand times. You were familiar with what he wrote about. He called himself a hunter. Sadly, you were not about to meet him. Castiel had told you that he had died a long time ago. Sam & Dean were the only family you had left.

“Um, hi.” you made yourself present & Dean turned around to meet your eyes. He looked a lot less tense, thank God.

“Slept well?” at least he was attempting to start a conversation with you. Nodding your head, you walked over to where Jack was sitting. Dean spoke up again.

“Hey, sorry for how I acted earlier. It was just a lot at once. I do want you to stay. We do.” he emphasized his words. This made you smile. At first you were not sure about how Dean would react but this showed you that he was trying & that was enough. Telling him it was fine, you sat down next to Jack & looked over at what he was reading. The book was old but the condition it was in was surprisingly well. A cup was placed in front of you by Dean & you thanked him. He brought you coffee.

“Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“Where is Sam? I wanna ask you guys something.” feeling silly with how you put it, way more dramatic than it actually was.

“Right here.” Sam entered the room, walked past Dean & straight to you. A pat to your shoulder eased the tension a little.

“What is it?” Dean seated himself on top of the table.

“Okay, so…I just want you guys to be honest with me, okay?” both men nodded, Jack was lost in his book, he did not even hear you conversation. You continued.

“Monsters are real & you hunt them?” their eyes widened at your question but deep down they expected something like that. The diary you owned was filled with the supernatural.

“Yeah, we do. It’s kinda the family business.” Dean chuckled at the end. You were family but clearly you had never hunted any monster before.

“Okay.” was all you answered.

“Okay? That’s it? You’re not running outta the door?” Sam could not believe you. He expected you to freak out. On the other hand...you were a Winchester.

“I don’t know about you, Sam, but I let an angel of the Lord look into my head. Monsters don’t sound too crazy after this.” all of you laughed out. “So, you guys hunt the supernatural. Castiel is an angel? And Jack? What is he? Your trainee?” the mention of his name made Jack look at you & before the boys could answer your question, Jack decided to take matter into his own hands.

“I’m a nephilim. The offspring of a human & an angel. Lucifer is my father but not really, you know. My mother died when I was born but I have Sam, Dean & Cas. They are my family.” his smile was too pure for this world but the way he so casually talked about the fact that he was Lucifer’s son had you stunned.

“Sure.” was all you could manage at that point. Jack’s smile grew wider & he got back to reading.

“Welcome to our world? I guess?” Sam’s smile was faked but if you were honest, you could imagine yourself being thrown into this mess. Nothing you could not handle.

~a few months later~

“Guys? Have you seen Cas?” you came running into the kitchen where Sam & Dean were having breakfast.

“What? You boyfriend ditched you?” Dean teased & earned a slap from Sam. You simply rolled your eyes at him. Your brothers realized very soon after coming to them that you had a big crush on Cas & Dean loved to mess with you.

“Shut up, asshole. We’re about to leave for the case in Wisconsin but he’s not here.”

“I haven’t heard from him but come on, sit down & have breakfast with us.” Sam offered. You walked over to the boys & sat down next to Dean who handed you a cup of coffee right away. Your smile was a thank you enough.

“Seriously, though. When will you tell him?” Dean munched on his food, not even looking at you but you knew the question was directed at you.

“That we’re leaving for the case? He knows that, Dean.”

“That you like him.” scoffing could be heard. Sam enjoyed your banter in silence. That was one indicator that you were a their sister. After warming up to them, they found out you were actually a lot like Dean. This made you guys argue more often, never too severe, mainly siblings teasing each other.

“Right, & then we’ll have that apple pie life. Is that what you want? Dean, he doesn’t like me like that.”

“Yeah, he does. Poor dude is a mess whenever he talks to you.” again, you simply rolled your eyes at him. Yes, Cas could be awkward when you guys talked but then again, this was Cas.

“(Y/N)?” Cas came into the kitchen where he could hear voices. Immediately your head snapped up & a smile started forming. An action that did not go unnoticed by both, Sam & Dean. Neither mentioned it though.

“There you are, I got worried for a second.” you got up & pulled Cas into a hug. That was nothing special. The two of you hugged each other all the time. Another thing that Dean commented on a lot of the time. Apparently, Cas had never been much of a hugger before you had come around. You simply shrugged it off even though, deep down, your heart skipped a beat at the idea of you being the reason for his change.

“Jack needed to talk to me, I’m sorry.”

“No problem, are you ready?”

“Yes, we should get going anyway.”

“Alright, bye boys.” whenever one of you got ready for a hunt, you made sure to say goodbye properly. You never knew. The last few months, your brothers had helped you with the basics of hunting. If they were honest, it felt like you were born to be a hunter. You picked up the skills quickly & learned a lot about the supernatural in a very short time. Cas told you that it probably was because you were always meant to be here. After a while, you started believing him. At first, Sam & Dean told you you were not allowed to come on a hunt with them but after realizing that you were good at what you did, you became an inherent part of the team which you were grateful for. Now, they even let you leave with Cas, a big step forward.

“Your bag’s already in the trunk.” Cas pointed at the back of the car.

“Thanks, Cas.” you lovingly smiled at him. Yeah, you were totally into him. Cas stopped briefly & got closer to you. Yet, he made sure to keep a little bit of distance between the two of you.

“Why don’t you tell me?” he whispered & you felt like you could not breathe for a second. Had he heard your conversation with Dean earlier?

“W-What?” you hated how weak & nervous your voice sounded. Why could you not play it cool? Why did you have to make a fool out of yourself? Before you could even process what was happening, Cas slowly leaned in & pressed his lips to yours softly. You were too shocked to kiss him back, not knowing if it was really happening right now. Cas pulled back & he looked rather uncomfortable. Your face was still full of shock.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done this. Just…Dean told me you liked me & then I heard your conversation & I thought you might-“ you cut his rambling off by pulling him close again. This time you kissed him & he lost no time in kissing you back. You let yourself get lost in the moment. You had dreamed about this particular moment for months & the fact that it was happening right now? Your body was on fire. When the both of you pulled apart for air, you could see Cas’ smile & you were sure your were blushing like crazy.

“So, Dean was right?” Cas’ hands settled on your waist & it felt natural. As if you had done it a thousand times.

“Remind me to kill him after this case.” you laughed & pulled Cas into a hug. He tightened his arms around you. Who would have thought, all those months ago, that you would end up with an actual family?

“Wasn’t he our…how do you call it? Wingman?” Cas chuckled after planting a soft kiss on the top of your head. He released you from the hug & you moved over to the passenger side. Your elbows were propped up on the hood & a smirk started forming at the corner of your mouth.

“Still. I told him to keep it to himself & he is my brother. I think I have permission to kill him for this.” of course you were joking & if you had to be honest, you were kind of glad that Dean could not keep his mouth shut. Cas walked over to the car, shaking his head at you but you could still see a small smile, opened the door & got in. You smiled to yourself. Finally, you knew that Cas did like you too. Where you were going from there? You were not sure yet. But there was a case you had to finish & it would take a few days to get it done. That would be enough time to figure out what you two were but you had a good feeling about this. It felt right & you had a home with people you loved & cared for. You were meant to be here from the start.

~to be continued?~ (let me know)

Part Two

Published (03/18/2021) by Cathy

Tags: @teelagurl558, @babymango-writes, @hollymac79 (thanks for your support <3)

[ptergwen]

the last time

warnings: angst and swearing

summary: here

-

“in order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love.”

it feels like your stomach just dropped all the way down the cliff you’re standing on. peter grips your arm, pulling you away from the cloaked man. you know what you have to do.

your dad sent you and peter to vormir to get the soul stone. they’d both been to space once before this, and it didn’t end well. they were lucky to survive. most of the universe didn’t. now you have the chance to fight for the same thing they did. the other avengers needed all the help they could get to pull this off, so here you are.

you’ll hopefully be able to bring everyone back. you just didn’t realize you’d have to die for them to live.

“he doesn’t know what he’s talking about, y/n. don’t listen to him.” peter rubs up and down your arm to calm you down, squinting his eyes at the man. you give him a halfhearted smile. all the words are stuck in your throat. you know he’s right, that one of you has to go. you’re not going to let it be peter.

you turn to face him with the same sad look. he shakes his head a bunch of times before you can say anything. “it’s true, peter. you know how nebula said gamora was here and never came back? he must have had to sacrifice her.” “no. no way. she... she could’ve gone somewhere else after-“

you cup both of peter’s cheeks, willing him to look at you. he puts his hands on top of yours and meets your eyes. nodding, you smooth your thumb across his skin gently.

“peter...” your voice breaks. you wanted to be strong for him, but it’s all hitting you at once. this is the last time you’ll see him. this is the last time you’ll see anyone.

“there’s gotta be another way, right? we’ll figure it out. you’re so smart. i know you can think of something.” he’s in denial. “no, peter. i can’t. i’m not my dad.” you let out a teary laugh, sniffling a bit. peter pulls you into his chest and holds you tightly against him. your arms hug his middle after a few seconds.

this is it. your final goodbye. you’ve been with peter for years, seen each other at your worst moments. nothing compares to what you’re going through right now. it’s never been so hard to let him go.

he presses his lips to your hair, which only makes you cry more. you’re finally able to pull away from his chest and crash your lips into his one last time. hands grasping at your waist, he kisses you back with tears running down his own cheeks. it’s messy and salty and heartbreaking, but it’s you guys. you wipe at the tear stains on peter’s suit and give him one more peck on his cheek.

“i love you the most, y/n. you know that, right? i’m so fucking in love with you,” peter chokes out, pressing his forehead against yours. you take a shaky breath and put your hands on his cheeks again. “i know, pete. i love you so much. so, so much.” you stay like that until both of you silently agree it’s time.

“now that you’ve said your goodbyes,” the red skull chimes in, “which one of you is it going to be?”

“me,” you and peter both say at the same time. huh? he looks at you with wide eyes. you’re just as confused as he is for once. “y/n, what? i thought we both decided it was gonna be me.” “no, that’s what i thought. you’re not doing this.”

the red skull sighs impatiently from behind you.

“please, y/n. i made a promise to your dad that i’d keep you safe out here. i can’t break that.” “i promised myself i wouldn’t let you die.” you give him a stern look. “maybe this is me dealing with some self-sacrificial stark shit right now, but i can’t break that either.”

ignoring everything you just said, peter moves to put his mask back on. you take it out of his hand. “uh, what the hell?” “peter, you‘re gonna do amazing things. you already do now. i can’t imagine what you’ll accomplish in ten years, or even one. you‘re not going yet.” he squeezes his eyes shut. “stop that. you will, too. just give me my mask back, y/n.”

you throw your hands up in disbelief, still holding it. “being rich isn’t amazing, peter! you have more going for you than i do. admit it.” he can’t help but frown at what you’re saying. this shouldn’t be your last memory together.

“baby, what are you talking about? you got to join the team, you make awesome high-tech stuff, you’re a genius. come on.” “here’s your mask.” you shove it into his hand, letting your touch linger for a moment. “i really do love you more than anything.” you suddenly make a run for the edge of the cliff before peter anticipates it.

he moves fast and shoots a web to pull you back, rushing over to you. “oh my god, y/n! what are you thinking?” “i’m thinking you need to get the stone. don’t worry about me.” you get yourself back up, only for peter to push you down again. so, he wants to fight you for this.

you knee his stomach from the ground so he falls over, taking the opportunity to jump for real. peter manages to lean over and shoot a taser web at you before you go too far. that one stings. you yelp and hold your arm where he got you, but you’re not giving up that easy.

“sorry, babe. didn’t mean to hurt you,” peter calls out, getting back on his feet. you walk the short distance over to him. “i’m doing this because i love you, okay? that’s all.” he whispers to you. with a fake smile, you take his hand. peter thinks that means you’re done. then, you use it to flip him onto his back. he groans in pain, not trying to get up this time.

now that he’s out for good, it’s really happening. you’re at peace with what you have to do. you take one final look at peter and start running. you run until you get to the edge of the cliff. peter must’ve realized what’s going on because you hear him calling your name. you forgot how much endurance he has in him.

“y/n, y/n stop!” he yells, already behind you. you stay put. “it shouldn’t be you! listen to me, it’s not too late to change your mind.” you don’t bother turning around to see him. you’ll give in if you do. “remember what i said, pete. all of it.”

with that, your heart beating hard in your ears, you throw yourself off the edge of the cliff. peter uses everything in him to web you to the side, but he can only get one out, so you grab onto a rock. not because you changed your mind. because you owe him a real final goodbye.

“wh- how am i out? i’ll come get you, just- fuck.” peter leans over the edge, looking down at you with watery eyes. you hold up his extra web cartridge and smile sadly. you took it when you were hugging earlier since you had a feeling he’d try to stop you.

“it’s okay, peter. you’ll be okay.” “y/n-“ you let go of the rock and fall fast, hitting the ground while peter cries out. “no!” he grips at the crumbling ground where you first jumped. your lifeless body is staring up at him. he could’ve stopped this. he drops to his knees as a loud sob racks through him, still looking down at you.

“no,” his voice is quiet, small, out of energy and broken. there’s no one here to dry his tears anymore.

-

peter isn’t sure how it happened, but he wakes up underwater. he pulls his head up with a cough. his eyes still feel puffy, so he couldn’t have been out too long. there’s something glowing in his hand. slowly, he opens his shaking hand and immediately recognizes what it is. the soul stone. red skull was right. peter lost who he loves all for a stupid fucking stone.

-

the whole team arrives back at the avengers facility at the same time, like bruce said they would. everyone seems so happy. thor got mjölnir back, scott is buzzing over steve, tony is laughing at one of nat’s jokes. tony. how is peter supposed to tell him what happened? his kid died, and it’s peter’s fault. he bursts into tears again at the thought of it. he’s surprised he even has more left in him.

tony is the first to notice. “parker, what’s wrong? why isn’t y/n with you?” the rest of the team rushes over to him. peter chokes out a sob, everything replaying in his head.

“she- she.” he can hardly breathe let alone speak. tony puts a hand on his shoulder. “kid, you’re scaring me. i can’t fix it unless you tell me what‘s up.” he waves for everyone else to back up so peter has space. bruce and nat share a look. “she’s gone, mr. stark! she’s not here. i re- i really messed up.”

peter throws the stone that he’s been holding at the floor. silently, rocket picks it up.

somehow understanding what he means, tony pulls peter in for a hug. he hurts like hell too, but this kid needs him right now. peter has always had a habit of blaming himself for things he can’t control. tony is pretty sure this is one of those things. he hugs him back as tight as he can.

“i’m so sorry, mr. stark. i’m so sorry.”

-

five years later and peter is numb. another stark left him, and he sort of gave up in life. at 21 years old. without a mentor, he got lost in the superhero world. spider-man went from being an avenger to party entertainment for kids. it’s an easy way to make money. the people loved him before, they’ll love him again. all he does now is book birthday parties and drink the nights away.

the only emotion peter still feels is anger. he hates the world and he hates what he’s done, or hasn’t done. every time he puts on that mask, it reminds him of the night you died. he has to fight the urge to rip it to shreds. if he didn’t need to pay the bills, he would’ve at this point. most of all, he resents himself for letting you down.

you sacrificed yourself for peter to lead a full life, and look what he’s done with it. he’s a drunk loser. that’s not what you wanted for him.

one day, it all changes.

there’s a knock at peter’s door. he grumbles something about paying his rent, expecting it to be his landlord. he opens it to find you instead. thinking he’s had too much to drink, he shuts the door in your face. you‘re a little bit shocked, but you knock again.

“um, peter? that’s you in there, right? pretty sure you’re the only peter parker in queens.” you call from the hallway. “whoever’s trying to fuck with me, just get out of here. i’m not in the mood today.” he flops back down on his couch, taking a sip of his nearly finished beer. you’re already fed up, so you open the door yourself.

“i said-“ he shuts up when you sit down next to him. “are you real? you can’t be... you died years ago.” “peter.” you take his hands. he’s confused, but lets you. it’s weird seeing him, both of you being adults now. you’ll have to get used to it.

“when you brought everyone back, it worked for me too.” he stares at you with his mouth hanging open for a minute. “that’s not possible. we did that a few days after you... you know.” “i know it sounds insane, but i came back on vormir. i had to find a way back to earth, which took a really long time. i’ve been looking for you since then. there’s no perfect way for me to explain all of this, but i promise it’s really me.”

you being here, it’s like peter was in a five year trance and he snapped out of it.

he throws his arms around you, you laughing and threading your fingers through his matted curls. he’s convinced you’ll disappear again if he lets you go, so he holds you even tighter.

“y/n, baby. oh my god. i missed you so much. i’m sorry it’s such a mess here.” you wind your arms around his neck. “you haven’t changed a bit, pete.” “i brought you back, you brought me back.”

[the-girl-in-the-box]

Not Today XL

A/N: Another day, another chapter! I had a lot of fun figuring out where I wanted to go with every step of this chapter, and in the end, I'm really happy (and heartbroken) with how it turned out! So, as always, I hope you enjoy and happy reading! Skål!

Summary: When Ivar takes the throne of Kattegat, Lagertha flees to Wessex along with Björn, Ubbe, Torvi, and the Bishop Heahmund. There, they seek the aid of King Alfred. This aid comes in the form of his sister, Aethelind, who agrees to travel to Kattegat and try to reason Ivar, who she spent some time with during their youth, when her grandfather King Ecbert hosted Ragnar Lothbrok in their castle. Now, she is the only hope for Lagertha and her supporters to retake Kattegat from Ivar the Boneless.

Masterlist

--

She couldn’t get that image out of her head, however hard she tried. Sitting alone the way she was now wasn’t any help, but she didn’t particularly feel like she wanted company in that moment. So, sitting alone on the beach was probably in her best interest. After all, no one could remind her of anything there.

Asta swallowed as she watched the sea, so deceptively calm after everything she had just experienced. Her hands were caked with blood, the same blood splattered across her face, and matted in her hair… Battles didn’t get easier, she was beginning to think. Perhaps they never would. Perhaps she was born into too peaceful a life to be suited for this. Perhaps growing up as a princess, always safe and at home in a well-guarded castle, meant she would never be prepared to be a shieldmaiden, spilling blood on a cruel battlefield to keep her own from being spilt.

The image flashed again in her mind, and she whimpered, drawing her knees up to her chest and burying her face in her arms, which she rested on top of them. How could this have happened? Was this the price of victory Freydís had warned her about? The price of having been able to see her one last time? Could the price really have been a battle that would haunt her dreams for the rest of her life?

Clashing swords and the screams of dead and dying men rang in Asta’s ears, soldiers falling on both sides of the battle. She had long since lost Ivar, Hvitserk, and Igor, and she hadn’t been able to find them again. The very thought of something happening to one of them because she’d lost them was driving her mad, but there was no more she could do than fight with everything in her so she might find them when it was done. And hopefully, they would still be there.

She also knew that, somewhere on that battlefield, Björn Ironside was there, one of the men who had trained her, and a man she had come to care deeply for at one point in her life. But now, she knew he would kill Ivar without a second thought, and she couldn’t let that happen. If it meant Björn died… she had made her peace with that before they’d even left their camp, even if she knew she would still mourn his loss. But he simply wasn’t, and couldn’t be, her priority anymore.

Climbing the cliff up to the top of the mountain had been brutal, clambering to reach Vestfold as she dodged various rocks and other items thrown down on her, but in the end she had succeeded, and ended the lives of those who had launched that assault in defense of their town. Part of her, a softer part of her that remained even after all she’d done, wanted to apologise for killing them, for trying to take their home from them. But Kattegat had been taken, and she was fighting with Ivar to take it back, and they couldn’t do so without first taking Vestfold. She apologised for nothing. 

Unfortunately, that hadn’t been the end of the retaliations she had to fight off. Large balls with protruding spikes in them were rolled down the hill, coated in oil, and lit on fire as they reached the base of the hill that led up to Vestfold, and they claimed the lives of many fighting beside her. Her heart hammered in her chest as she fought to get around them, and dodged them as she climbed the- rather steep- hill. After the initial wave of them, it appeared they had run out, and so the soldiers of Kiev overran those of Vestfold, flooding into the town with every intention of taking it. They were almost there, Asta knew, they just had to get into the town, and be prepared to defend it.

It was after that she’d first seen him fighting, truly something incredible to witness. She’d never seen Björn Ironside fight, aside from the twice she’d fought him herself, but now she could see what all the fuss was about for herself, without the added danger of being the one taking the force of his attack. And yet, though she had already said goodbye to him in Kattegat, with the full belief she would never see him again, she found herself drawn to make two times three.

Getting to Björn hadn’t been a difficult thing at all, it was only waiting her chance to attack him herself that tried her, having to keep people off her back who wanted to say they’d defended the great warrior theirselves. But they fell easily, and soon enough she saw an opening where they both were unchallenged, and so she challenged him.

It came as no surprise to Asta how easily he caught her blade with his own, but clearly the sight of her being there at all came as a surprise to him. His eyes had widened, and he stumbled back just a bit.

“Aethelind,” he said, blinking a few times, and then he’d had to lift his sword to keep hers from coming down and burying itself in his body. “Aethelind, what are you doing here?”

“Thought you’d appreciate the rematch,” she snarked, and grinned a bit at the confusion on his face.

“You are angry that I attacked you in Kattegat,” he surmised. Another swing, and he blocked her again.

“Of course I am angry!” she yelled. She hadn’t quite realised it until then. “You tried to kill me for a chance at Ivar! How could I not be angry?”

“Aethelind, you don’t understand,” he said, reaching out and grabbing her arm with his hand, overpowering her with sheer strength and forcing her to step back. “Ivar was- and still is- too dangerous to allow to go free.”

“Is he?” she asked, a wild fury beginning to grow in her eyes. “You should have warned me of that before I spent every night in the last months in his bed.”

That had stunned Björn into releasing her hand, and she’d pushed back, now putting him on the defensive. “Perhaps you should have told me that instead of fighting me to stop me from going with him! Perhaps you should have told me that before I fell in love with him!”

With every time she suggested he should have told her, her attacks became more and more fierce, and vicious, until Björn was rapidly losing ground against her.

“Aethelind, stop!” he tried to tell her, but instead of answering him, she screamed, “Don’t CALL me that!”

He missed her sword with his, and instead was forced to grab her hand with his free hand again, twisting her around and making her drop it, yanking her back so that she couldn’t escape his grasp. “I won’t fight you,” he said. “I won’t fight you anymore, Aethelind.”

“My name is Asta,” she hissed, and stomped hard on his foot, making him release her. She stumbled forward away from him and grabbed her sword, lifting it and turning just in time to see Björn’s back to her, and a sword pierced his body.

Everything stopped.

Time itself seemed to freeze as Björn Ironside fell to his knees, and Ivar the Boneless was revealed on his other side, his sword pulling back out of Björn’s body as he fell. His presence alone had been enough to tell Asta what had happened, but seeing the weapon in his hand, wet with Björn’s blood, solidified it. Ivar had killed him. 

Maybe her first move should have been to drop to her knees beside Björn and see if he would be alright, but her concern for Ivar’s whereabouts and safety overwhelmed her concern for Björn, and so she dropped her sword right there and crossed the space between herself and her lover.

Ivar pressed his forehead to hers, and Asta’s hands came up to frame his face between them. “My love…” she breathed, and he shushed her soothingly.

“I know,” he almost whispered. “I know, I’m here. I’m okay. I promised you I would be.”

Asta wrapped her arms around him then and held him tightly, leaning into the kiss he pressed to the side of her head. “I lost you on the battlefield,” she said shakily, closing her eyes. “I didn’t know if I’d find you after, and if I did… I had no idea what state you’d be in.”

He pulled back to look at her then with a wide grin. “A victorious one,” he told her. “Hvitserk is leading the final push into Vestfold. We cannot lose now.”

A grin split Asta’s face at this news, and in her sheer relief, she pressed her lips to Ivar’s in an elated sort of way. They’d done it. He and Hvitserk had survived, and that only left Igor. If two of the three of her prayers had been answered, what were the odds that the third had not been?

As it turned out, all three of her prayers had indeed been answered, but it was the death of Björn Ironside that still weighed heavily on her heart. Apparently, she hadn’t made her peace with it as well as she’d thought she had.

Asta eventually looked back up again, her cheeks wet from the tears which had run down them, eyes glassy with those still unshed, and she swallowed hard. “We both know I was angry,” she said softly, almost mumbling the words as opposed to fully speaking them out. “I didn’t want you dead, not really, though. I was glad you stopped me from killing you. But now…”

She took a deep breath in and let it out, but was interrupted by a new voice, even if still familiar. “Why do you think I am dead? Huh? You think I am killed so easily?”

Asta’s eyes widened and she turned toward Björn with shock in them, having clearly expected him to be dead. “In truth, I hadn’t,” she confessed. “It caught me by surprise when Ivar…” She paused, swallowing. “You’re Björn Ironside. That title came to you for all the battles you made it through unscathed. I don’t think it ever occurred to me there would be battles that scarred you.”

“Everyone’s day will come,” he told her. “Perhaps this will be mine, perhaps it will not be. Who can say? Only the gods know.”

“So you aren’t dead?” she asked, turning to look at him again. He shook his head.

“And you are with Ivar?” he asked in return. She nodded. “Did he really kill his wife, Freydís?”

“He did,” she confirmed with a heavy air about herself. “I came in a few minutes too late.” Asta let out a soft chuckle, one that sounded far too bitter coming from her. “Do you know I almost went and checked on them before I did? That I made myself stay and fight for just a few more minutes before it hit me, what had happened? I knew Ivar would have figured it out before me, and that he was in there with her, and… that’s when I finally went. Not when I initially thought to go to be sure they were both alright. I should have gone then, she might still be alive.”

“You cannot blame yourself for what he did,” Björn said. “He should have never done it.”

“And yet he did,” Asta stressed. “He did, Björn, and I could have stopped him if I had gone just a moment before! I could have saved her. I could have saved Freydís, and I wouldn’t be so terrified of losing anyone else. I wouldn’t still grieve her. I wouldn’t have to face the fact I will grieve her all the days of my life, as I have since I left Kattegat. I wouldn’t have to know this world lost one of the most beautiful people God put on it. I wouldn’t… She wouldn’t be gone.”

Björn watched her thoughtfully, frowning at this expression of guilt from her. “She would not be,” he confirmed. “But it is not your fault that she isn’t.”

Asta broke at these words, and when she blinked, tears leaked down from her eyes, staining her cheeks as her hair whipped around her in the wind. “Then why do I blame myself for it?” she sobbed out.

He wanted to sit up and comfort her, but while she was on the beach, and doing so might have seemed as easy as scooting over a bit to her, that wasn’t so. For him, he saw her sitting at the foot of what would likely be his deathbed, and he didn’t have the strength quite to sit up and do it. So he was forced to sit there and watch her endure this alone. Unfortunately, he didn’t quite have the words for her either, and so he simply sat there in silence. What could he say that she likely didn’t already know? She was a smart woman, and wiser to the world now than when she’d left Kattegat. He wished now that he’d never agreed to it, seeing how it had been the beginning of a path that had clearly led to heartbreak.

Her head suddenly lifted, and she looked up, as if seeing someone else approach. She offered whoever it was a shaky smile, the kind meant to obscure pain but that did a horrible job at it, and nodded. Ivar, if Björn had to guess. She looked back to him once more, and he nodded. As much trouble as he had with his brother, he suspected he would take care of her. Freydís had betrayed him, yes, but Asta… She had grown stronger than he’d ever imagined she would, and had clearly stayed at Ivar’s side no matter what. That sort of loyalty would be the sort Ivar repaid with his own loyalty. He would take care of her.

Asta stood, and disappeared from his room. When she left, he laid his head back, and he closed his eyes. The vague sound of Gunnhild’s voice reached his ears, his beautiful wife. He wondered if she would miss him, and all the pain he’d brought her.

And, as his eyes closed, he faded from the beach, leaving Asta alone with Ivar, who noticed the tears running down her cheeks. “What are you out here thinking about, huh?” he asked her, worry evident in his voice as he reached up to wipe her tears away. “What does a fierce warrior like you have to mourn tonight? We won our battle. You should be celebrating with us.”

“I miss her,” Asta confessed, looking to the ground. Ivar swallowed hard at her words.

“Freydís?”

“Who else?”

He sighed, and brought her closer, hugging her tightly and holding the back of her head with his free hand. She rested it against his chest, letting the familiar sound of his heartbeat comfort her. “I miss her too,” he confessed. “Every day. I am not sure a day will go by I don’t miss her.”

“I know there won’t be for me,” Asta said. “After she died, I told her I would mourn for her, every day until I died, and even now I still believe it. Ivar, I loved her so much…”

“I know you did,” he whispered. “So did I.” His chest ached as he opened himself up entirely to Asta, even as he felt he shouldn’t say those things. After all, what right did he have to do so? He had killed her, and if he’d restrained himself, Asta wouldn’t be crying in his arms just then.

She might not have been in his arms at all, but that was a tricky train of thought, full of theories he couldn’t prove short of outright asking her, and he wasn’t about to do that. So instead, he held her, hoping to comfort her. He’d turn back time if he could, take it all back, but he couldn’t. This was all he could do. This, and he could follow through on the vow he’d silently made to himself, that he would never do to Asta what he had done to Freydís. Even if she turned her own sword against him, he would let her do what she needed. He certainly deserved it.

“We should get back inside,” she eventually said, whispering more than she was outright speaking. “It’s cold tonight.”

Ivar hummed his agreement and nodded, wrapping an arm around her and shifting so he could use his crutch while he kept her safely tucked up beneath him, where he could try and keep her warm. 

They walked all the way to the Great Hall that way, and Asta stayed closer still to him as they entered to find the feast still in full swing, celebrators eating and drinking to their heart’s content. But Asta clearly didn’t have the constitution for it that night, and she wrapped her arms around Ivar’s waist, letting him lead her out another door to head back to where they would sleep that night.

Not that they got very far.

Hvitserk had seen them walk through, and he quietly got up and slipped out after them, not liking the look on Asta’s face. No one else in that room knew her the way he and Ivar did, and no one else would have recognised it for what it was- grief. He wanted to check on her.

The pair stopped when they heard his voice call out to her, and Asta looked over her shoulder to find him walking worriedly towards her. “Hi, Hvitserk,” she greeted, her voice far softer than it usually was. He frowned as he noticed this.

“Asta, what’s wrong?” he questioned her, worry seeping into his voice.

“I’m just tired,” she tried, making him lift a brow and look at Ivar. Clearly, he didn’t believe her. Ivar returned his confused expression with one which promised he would explain when they got a moment alone. Hvitserk still frowned, not quite satisfied, but looked back to Asta.

“Get some sleep then, yeah?” he suggested. “It won’t be long before we move on Kattegat. We need you well rested. Asta nodded, and allowed him to hug her, swallowing a bit when he kissed the top of her head. “And if you need me for anything, come find me?” She nodded again, and he copied her. “Alright,” he finally said, and released her again into Ivar’s care. It felt a lot like that last night of theirs in Kattegat, he realised, as he gave Ivar a look which again warned him, Take care of her.

And just like that night, Ivar looked at him in such a way as to answer, I will.

Hvitserk nodded and watched as Ivar led her away. He had a sinking feeling in his chest as he watched them go, and for once, he found it wasn’t because he worried about her with Ivar. No, Ivar loved her, and probably more than himself. But he hadn’t ever seen her like this. Whatever was on her mind, it was pulling her far further down than he’d ever seen.

The flash of golden blonde hair and deep blue eyes slipped through his mind, and his heart broke for her just a little bit more. 

Taglist: @youbloodymadgenius, @katfett, @sylki-simp, @heavenly1927, @pomegranates-and-blood, @kingniazx, @dekusdante

If you want to be added to the taglist, feel free to reach out either by commenting, reblogging, DMing me, or sending an ask, and I’ll be more than happy to add you!

[khadij-al-kubra]

Storytelling, Fate & Happy Endings

I’m still processing last nights episode (CR C2 Ep140), and much like every critter I’m SUPER emotional about it. But something about last night’s events and how they played out really got to me, not just as a fan but also as a storyteller. And even the day after, i was actually crying (still am crying in fact) more than i did last night watching it happen. At first i thought it was because i’m a fairly new critter and this is my first time watching a campaign come to an end. But the more i think about it and process, the more i realize that’s not just it. This effected me as someone who deeply believes in the power of storytelling and how it can not only effect but reflect the world around us. And because I have to get them out of my head, here are my thoughts on why last nights episode was so important, not just for CR fans but also as a an important narrative for right now.

...Yeah that’s a bit vague, isn’t it? Okay, let me explain. If you’re willing to take the time to read fellow Critters, I greatly appreciate it in advance. ^__^

WARNING: Major spoilers for CR Campaign 2 Episode 140 ahead. Also it’s gonna get kind of meta. And long. Because i have a lot of thoughts & feels.

So I think it’s fair to say that, as much as we would’ve been devastated by any of the M9 perma-dying in the last battle, part of us wasn’t expecting them all to make it out of there alive. Not even the players, I think, despite how much they likely didn’t want that to happen. Just look at the half-resigned way Liam talks about Caleb in the last few Talks Machina episodes. Or how, in game, Jester was fully prepare to die trying to stop the city from coming back. And for a while there, it seemed like some of them might not survive.

But then they did. Despite so many crappy rolls throughout the night they stopped Lucien, set free all the souls trapped in Aeor, saved Exandria, and brought each other back from the dead. Not only that, but they also did the impossible: They saved Mollymauk. Their lost friend who had such a deep impact on all of them even after his death. The delightfully charming asshole who was so full of joy and life and who, despite how the world treated him, was happily determined to leave every place better than he found it. Moreover, they almost didn’t succeed! But then they did, all because of teamwork, love and one last minute ditch effort ‘what-the-hell-have-i-got-to-lose’ dice role that none of them saw coming. And now they get to go home together, truly as The Mighty NINE.

Just this once, everybody lived! We got a happy ending!

And that’s HUGE in game...but also think for a second how that reflects outside of game too. Do you realize what a story like that means to people, especially given the year from Hell we’ve all had?

Think about it. This past year the world has suffered. We’ve all been impacted by the pandemic in some way shape or form, either on small levels or large. Our world has been at war with a virus that effected everyone and everything: Our sense of safety. Our health. Our economy. Our families & friends. Our freedom. (in the sense of our ability to travel & just be in close proximity to people without fear, but i digress) Deeply imbedded social and systematic diseases have been brought further to light in the past year and a half largely because of this virus. Some of us have lost people we love. Hell, the pandemic even effected the way that the latter half of Campaign 2 played out because of social distancing protocols. If you further compare this to Campaign 2, the world of Exandria was caught in the middle of a war that started because of social & systematic corruptions that had been rooted in two opposing kingdoms for years. And so many suffered and died because of it.

Then the Mighty Nein comes in. This ragtag group of delightful assholes with nothing to lose; these flawed but inherently good at heart and deeply human adventurers, broken and lost in their own ways, trying to make a home and family for themselves in a world that took advantage of them or left them alone or said they weren’t good enough...and they changed things. 

They grew. They fought back. They found moments of silliness and peace and joy and fun amidst all the strife and sometimes grief. Most of all, they tried. Sometimes out of necessity, sometimes out of spite, sometimes even out of compassion, but mostly just out of love. And in the end, not only did they help people and stop a war for the sake of their loved ones, but they also saved their world from being destroyed by a rotted perversion of life from the past that threatened to consume everything they cared about. AND they STILL managed to bring everyone in their found family back to life. Does it erase the bad and sad things that happened to them? Hell no! But those things don’t negate the fact that in that moment, they made it out okay. That this was a victory and they won!

Think of what a story like that means to people right now.

I’m personally a pretty spiritual person, and much like our favorite clerics, I also believe in a higher power. But whether or not you also believe in a Divine being, the Universe or whatever, every D&D player believes in one thing: Fate. Luck. Call it what you will. But it was fate that made those dice rolls that saved everyone happen. It was fate that not only stopped Cognoza from returning, but also brought Jester and Caleb and Molly back to life, even when it seemed like it wouldn’t work. (and holy shit that gave me emotional whiplash!) 

After everything they went through, both individually and together, the Mighty Nein defied the odd and demanded that Fate let them save their loved ones. They demanded that the world give them back their friend; That they deserved to have their happy ending & get to go home alive together. Just. This. Once.

As a writer, I know firsthand that there are some stories we find and create ourselves, but then there are stories that have a way of finding us. Sometimes a story or world or character from somewhere in the Aether will pop into our minds one day and say, ‘I need your voice to tell my story.’ Maybe this is just me getting carried away with the meta brain again. And like i said, i’m a spiritually inclined person, so I believe in things like Fate and a Divine Higher power writing out the stories of the Multiverse. If you’re reading this (and thank you for taking the time to do so) maybe you do too. Or maybe you don’t. Either way, if you’re a fellow critter, then you’re clearly a fan of good stories and/or playing Dungeons & Dragons. So you know how fate/dice roles have a big impact on the outcome of a story, regardless of how tightly written a setup the dungeon master makes. Given all that and how organically stories tend to play out in D&D, I genuinely believe that Matt Mercer and the whole CR Team were meant to be conduits for a story where the flawed heroes save the world AND all make it home alive.

And I think Fate knew that we needed last nights battle to end like this. After all the crap we’ve been through this past year, we needed this happy ending, deserved it even! Not just us critters, the CR team too. As much as we all like to joke that Campaign 2 was secretly scripted, we all know that’s not true. Yes, the setup storyline and world were brilliantly crafted by Matt, and the character roleplaying is beautifully acted out by the team. But the twists and turns, the direction it goes, and how the game plays out is all up to fated dice rolls just like any other game. And something, some kind of force of luck, some force of fate, some Universal Divine DM out there made the roles happen the way they did last night.

It gave us a happy ending.

I believe that this was meant to happen; now of all times with everything else going on in the world. Amidst all this darkness and rot, both in game and in the real world, in the end of it all there was light and life. A reminder that sometimes people do live. They do get second chances. They do find a new family or reunite with old ones. That sometimes the world can be saved for a time, and happy ending do still exist. Even if it’s not broadcasted on the daily news amidst tragedy reports, or even tragedies that don’t get reported (which sadly are a lot, but again i digress).

Because the thing is, like Beau said, no one else will probably know they were heroes. No one will know what the Mighty Nein sacrificed to save all of Exandria. But they don’t need to know that for it to still be true, for life to happen again, and for a found family of nine broken people who love each other to go home together safe. It doesn’t invalidate that the good things happened. That at least for today everyone was saved. That flawed people were still able to do good because they tried. That they left the world better than they found it and got their own small but satisfying happy ending. Even if only for now, because we don’t know what’s gonna happen next Thursday. We don’t know what the future will hold for the Nein or Exandria when the Campaign ends or even when (hopefully) some loose ends will be tied up in later oneshots. But neither that nor the bad and sad stuff that happened beforehand in the game and in the character’s lives invalidates the fact that tonight they won. They lived.

So why can’t that be true for us in the real world?

I said earlier that, as a writer, I believe in the power stories have to not only reflect but also shape our world. This story is an example of why, but especially this episode, and that’s why i was so euphoric about the outcome. It wasn’t just a game for me, and i’m sure for others too. It was a much needed reminder that happy endings can still happen in real life, just as much as they can in stories. Even when everything seems dark and corrupt and rotten and hopeless, we can still keep fighting. We can keep trying. We can make new families and start over and be heroes in our on little lives in small ways. 

We can leave the world better than we found it. 

And maybe, with hard work, imagination, luck and a little Divine intervention...we can also get the happy endings we deserve.

[lawslessons]

Hi may I request a one shot with female!reader x Ace where she is a childhood friend of Luffy, Ace and Sabo. But now in the present, she is dating Ace. So when they visit Luffy and tell him the news, he feels excluded and starts to interrumpt the couple in every chance he gets. For example, Ace and the reader are taking a bath toguether and suddenly Luffy barges through the door and throws himself into the tub so they all can bathe toguether like when they were kids. I just thought about it and its so funny to me lol

Oh my gosh! I love this! This got a good chuckle out of me and I hope you enjoy this!

Warnings: None

Synopsis: Three can be a crowd, Ace and his girlfriend found this the hard way when they told Luffy about them being together. It seems as if they can never get a moment alone together, but neither of them are aware of the true reason for Luffy interrupting them constantly. 

“Are we safe here?” She asked as she removed her shirt and dropped it to the side of the bathroom floor. Ace glanced around the large bathhouse on board of the ship and nodded his head, no one would interrupt them here.

“Yeah, I think so,” Ace said as he removed his shorts and went about sitting in the hot water with his girlfriend. He was exhausted and he could tell that she was too. It had only been a week since they had told Luffy the news of them being together and while it looked like he was accepting and excited for them, it was becoming obvious that something was happening with the youngest brother.

“Finally, peace and quiet,” She smiled as she sunk further into the water, down to where her mouth was under the warm water so she could blow bubbles. Ace laughed at her ridiculous behavior and smiled to himself. Ever since they were little, he had known there was something special about her. Her energy, her spunk, her charisma. She felt like the opposite of him in so many ways, but on the same hand it felt like they were the same person. They clicked so well with one another that it scared him. But,  because of how close they always seemed to be, it only felt natural that they got together and made their feelings for one another official, and that was what happened almost a year ago. They had waited a while to tell Luffy because they were worried he would be confused, or that it would distract him from his own journey. Like always, Ace was selflessly worried about his own brother rather than his own feelings, so she felt like it was her responsibility to remind him that he needed to also look out for himself and not people please too much.

“I’m worried about him,” Ace finally said. She sighed, she knew this was going to come up soon.

“I know you are, this is a lot to process. He’s known us for so many years, his whole life. We’re his big sister and brother, it must be weird for him to see us together like this.” She said as she started to clean her hair off.

This week had been a lot for them to handle. Luffy had interrupted quite a few moments between them. When she was talking with Ace on the deck, Luffy would walk in between them and join their conversation without asking. When they were on the island, he would always go with them. Heck, Ace even allowed Luffy to go on one of their dates which she wasn’t so happy about. Moments that she wanted to have between only Ace and herself were being disrupted by the youngest brother of Ace. She had to admit that so far the worst was when her and Ace were trying to have a more couple moment together somewhere private and Luffy seemingly jumped in out of no where. But now, they finally had the peace she so craved and wished for.

“I hope he isn’t mad at us,” Ace said as he used his fire powers to warm the water a little more to his liking.

“Mad? No, Why would he be mad at us?” She asked him as she relaxed more in the water and let some of her stress melt away.

“I don’t know, he’s just acting weird, that’s all I know,” Ace said as he rinsed his own hair off and moved to sit closer to her so they wouldn’t have to talk so loud.

“Yeah, he — “ before she could finish what she wanted to say, the door to the bathhouse burst open and in came someone. The person who came in laughed and jumped into the bathwater and splashed it all over the floor.

“Hi!” The person said as he stood up to look at Ace and his girlfriend. It was of course Luffy, no one could mistake his signature laugh for anyone else’s. She gasped and sunk further into the water so she wouldn’t expose herself and Ace did his best to cover her up by somewhat sitting in front of her.

“Luffy, what are you doing in here?” Ace sternly asked as he stared up at his grinning brother.

“Taking a bath with you! We used to do this all the time,” Luffy reminded him as he sat down in front of Ace and tried to smile at the woman behind him. He waved at her again and crossed his arms over his chest.

“You’re both acting weird,” Luffy pouted. A vein popped into Ace’s head when he said that.

“Us? What about you? After we told you that we’re together, you started to act really strange,” Ace pointed out to his younger brother. And just for a second, she swore she saw the youngest brother tense up as he looked away.

“No. I’m not being weird,” Luffy grumbled childishly as he looked down at the water.

“Luffy…” She softly said before she moved away from behind Ace to look at the younger boy. He wasn’t much of a boy anymore, he was a captain of his own crew and a man of great ambition. “Are you perhaps jealous?” She asked with a sympathetic smile.

“What does that mean?” Luffy asked with a small tilt of his head, in that moment she knew that Luffy was jealous but wasn’tt consciously aware of it.

“Luffy, even though me and her are together, that doesn’t mean we love you any less, you’re still our little brother, we’re still going to be close like always,” Ace assured him as he roughly patted his brother’s shoulder and laughed when he almost fell into the water again.

“So I can stay here then?” Luffy asked with a small grin.

“As if! Go!” She scolded as she swatted Luffy’s arm and watched as Luffy ran out of the bath with a laugh. “Did he even bring a towel?” She asked, and a feminine scream outside and a loud punch answered his question. “I guess he didn’t,” she laughed. As she laughed, Ace smiled at her and moved to hug her from behind.

“Hopefully he understand now,” Ace mumbled.

As the rest of their visit went on, they started to notice a difference in Luffy. He wasn’t pushy to go with them everywhere and somewhat respected their space when they were in their room and the bathroom together. And when the time came for Ace and his girlfriend to leave, Luffy smiled at them and gave them both a tight squeeze.

“Bye, I love you guys!” Luffy said as he pulled away from the hug.

“We love you too Luffy,” Ace smiled.

“So much,” She added on as she squeezed Ace’s hand. That seemed to be all the reassurance Luffy needed from the two. With that, he waved them off and went to continue his own adventure while they continued their own.

[honeypiehotchner]

i knew you (Bucky Barnes soulmate AU) -- part nine

This felt like it took AGES to get out but college really has had me busier than ever. Anywho, all that’s left after this part is an epilogue :( This is pretty much all fluff! Love you all xx.

After Sam, Steve, and even Bucky sign the Accords -- Colonel Rhodes signed while you were gone -- it is ratified. Which leaves the rest of you to tie up the loose ends.

For starters, where Bucky will be receiving help. For a moment you’re worried he’ll want to return to Romania, but he doesn’t even mention it. Instead, he says he’s up for suggestions.

To your complete surprise, T’Challa steps up and asks if he may offer his services.

“Wakanda is safe, no one will bother you there,” the King explains. “And we may be able to help rid your brain of the programming, not just give you ways to cope. My sister, Shuri, she will be able to help you.”

You look at Bucky, hopeful. It sounds like a good idea, but it’s ultimately up to him. Or so you thought.

Because Bucky turns his head to look at you, eyes soft, but so lost. “What do you think?”

“I think…” You pause. “I think you should do whatever makes you feel comfortable.”

“What would make you comfortable?” He asks. “You feel what I feel.”

You nod. “I know. I just don’t want to make any decisions for you that you won’t like.”

“I think I need your help with this one, doll,” Bucky says, gentler this time, pleading. 

“Okay, well, I think Wakanda is a good idea. Away from everyone else, you’ll really be able to heal.” You’re careful not to mention yourself, unsure as to whether or not Bucky will even want you to be with him. “And I think T’Challa’s offer is genuine.”

T’Challa nods. “I will go call my sister.” He disappears to do just that.

You stand in awkward silence, wondering what hit will come next. After the past two years, the past two hours seems too good to be true. There has to be a catch -- even if you desperately want it to be real, with no catch.

Without saying a word, Steve ushers Natasha, Sam, and Tony from the room, leaving you completely alone with your soulmate for the first time.

You never thought you’d feel this nervous.

You pull one of the chairs back from the table, sitting down to hopefully come across as relaxed as possible. You hate feeling like you need to tiptoe around Bucky, but right now, you don’t know what else to do.

He follows your movement, taking the seat directly next to you, though he keeps his distance, unsure.

One would think that if you feel what each other feels, then moments like these wouldn’t be so awkward. But they are.

“Thank you,” Bucky finally says. “For today. For everything.”

“You’re welcome,” you murmur, studying your hands to keep from studying him, which you desperately want to do. “How are you doing?”

“I have one hell of a headache.”

You laugh, something about the way he said it, or maybe the fact that despite the insane nature of today’s events, something as mundane as a headache still plagues him enough to mention. A reminder that you’re both only human.

Bucky doesn’t mind the laughter. It’s a sound he remembers only vaguely from his dreams, but his dreams have nothing on this. Nothing on the way your eyes squint, the way you cover your mouth and the way he wants to reach over and grab your hand so he can see your smile, the way his mouth aches to tell you that you should never hide. The real thing is a thousand times better than his dreams. He can’t believe he almost let you get away.

“How are you?” He asks, having realized he has yet to ask you this, even after all he’s put you through.

Your eyebrows raise slightly in surprise, though you hide it well. “I’m okay.” You pause, not wanting to elaborate, not knowing if he wants to know. Is it too weird?

“Steve told me you thought he was full of it when he would tell you about me,” Bucky tries a different route, a different conversation. “I swear he wasn’t lying. Your eyes are still my favorite color, and yes, I told everyone about you. There wasn’t a day when I didn’t talk about you.”

You’ve started smiling before you can stop it. “Really?”

“You think Steve drew portraits of you because he wanted to? No, I had to talk him into it after the first few. He kept telling me, ‘Buck, what could’ve changed?’ And truth was, nothing changed. I just wanted another picture to hold.”

You cup your cheeks, soreness settling in from how hard you’ve been grinning. Just like that, your Bucky has come back to you.

The one you’ve seen in your dreams is sitting in front of you, smiling sheepishly.

“I have the drawings now,” you confess, watching Bucky’s eyes widen in surprise.

“They survived?”

“Somehow,” you nod. “Steve gave them to me when we met.” You pause. “He also gave me a letter.”

Realization dawns on Bucky’s face as he remembers the letter, the night he wrote it. It was late, he was leaving the next morning, but he had to write this letter to you. He had to write it and get it to Steve if it was the last thing he ever did. He remembers shoving it into Steve’s chest, telling him he had to get it to you somehow, it didn’t matter how, he just had to do it for him. Bucky was a little drunk and a lot heartbroken, because he feared he’d never get to meet you. That he’d die in the war and leave you stranded.

After all those years, it finally ended up in your hands.

“Did you read it?”

You shake your head. “I hold it a lot. Sleep with it under my pillow. I could never bring myself to read it, though. Steve told me you wrote it in case you died before you got to meet me?”

Bucky nods slowly.

“Well,” you smile softly. “You’re right here.”

Bucky does the unthinkable. He reaches over with his flesh hand, fingers outstretched and palm up. It takes you a second before you realize what he’s silently asking. Gently, you place your hand in his, holding back your tears as his fingers wrap around yours.

“I’m right here,” he whispers, tears gathering in his eyes, too. Then, he shakes his head. “I can’t believe I finally found you.”

That sentence is the one that breaks you. Your lip quivers and the dam breaks. So many years of not knowing. More years of knowing, of living with the fact of your soulmate being dead. Two years of looking. And finally--

Finally, he’s here.

More of the unthinkable happens when the tears spill over your cheeks. Bucky doesn’t expect himself to do this either, but he can’t stand to see you crying. He rolls his chair closer, hand slipping from yours only so he can gather you in his arms.

Your arms wrap around his neck while his fit around your waist. 

“I’m so sorry,” he says into your neck, your skin wet with his tears.

“I’m sorry too,” you cry, fingers threading through his hair.

For a moment, all that exists are your two souls, finally at peace, now that they have found one another.

+++

The plan is to travel to Wakanda by Quinjet. Tony arranged everything with T’Challa, so all that’s left is for you, Bucky, and Steve to board.

Steve opts to fly the jet, which leaves you alone with Bucky. Again.

“Hey Bucky?”

“Yes, doll?”

You’re still not used to him calling you doll. You never thought he’d be comfortable enough for that, let alone the way he hugged you earlier.

But you guess that’s just what happens when you finally find your soulmate.

You try to focus. There’s one question that has been gnawing at your mind -- and everyone else’s, even Steve’s -- since it happened.

“You don’t have to answer if it’s too hard, or complicated, but can I ask why--” You pause, gathering your thoughts. “When you were the Soldier, why were you protecting me?” Your eyes meet Bucky’s. “Why did you tell me that your orders were to protect me? You nearly killed anyone else you saw and it just…”

You see it when Bucky remembers that he said those words to you as the Soldier. He takes a few moments, collecting himself, and you expect him to not say anything else. Which you would be fine with. You know it’s hard-- more than hard, to deal with.

But he begins explaining.

“When they first tried to program me,” he sighs, almost shudders, “it didn’t work very well. I fought it harder than they were expecting, I guess.” There is no pride hiding in his tone, only disgust. “They had to somehow convince me I was doing it all for you, to protect you. I don’t think they ever thought I’d meet you, but at one point they had to tell me I was following your orders. All I could think about was you, so they had to...use that to their advantage.”

“I understand,” you say because you can’t think of anything else. What do you say to something like that? Nothing you say will make it better. He’s aching, you can feel it, and it kills you knowing that there are no magical words to make it all go away.

“You’re sure I didn’t hurt you?” Bucky’s worried voice brings you back down.

“No,” you shake your head, even though you know no matter how many times you say it, he won’t be convinced. “You didn’t, I swear. You wanted me as close to you as possible and you followed my every word. It was...strange. I could tell it wasn’t you, but…” You stop yourself, not wanting to admit that you had briefly wanted the Soldier to stay. But that was before Bucky would actually look at you and hold a conversation with you, like he’s doing now. Now, you know this is who you want to stay. Your Bucky.

“Could you feel it?” He asks quietly, eyes focusing on his hands instead of your face. “When I would…”

“Yes,” you answer, not needing him to say it. “I didn’t know that’s what I was feeling until I found out that you were the Soldier, but yes.”

“I remember when I started to feel you,” he says softly, a smile almost crossing his face. “It didn’t last long because they would wipe my memory, but it was...probably the best day of my life. Knowing you were somewhere out there.”

“Why’d you say you didn’t know me?” You ask, briefly wondering if you’re treading in dangerous waters.

“I didn’t want to believe it was really you,” Bucky admits, shaking his head. “After all these years-- All the hell I went through, and then there you were, standing in my apartment.” He looks up to meet your eyes and finds tears there. “I knew from the way you were feeling that it wasn’t for a good reason. I had seen the paper, too. I knew I was in trouble.” He pauses, wiping one of your tears away. “I wanted to protect you, doll. That’s all I’ve ever been trying to do.”

His hand lingers, and you lean into his touch, gripping his wrist to keep him there.

“And then you started jumping off buildings after me,” he jokes, earning a small laugh from you. 

“You were really pissing me off doing that, you know,” you tease.

“Yeah, well,” his serious tone makes you open your eyes. “If you ever jump out of a building like that again…”

“Don’t make me run after you again, then,” you reply, just as serious.

“That’s a fair deal,” he smiles.

A moment passes, Bucky’s thumb brushing your cheek.

“Just for the record,” Steve’s voice comes from the front. “You guys make me sick.”

Laughter fills the cab of the Quinjet, and your tears recede like an ocean’s waves. 

Steve talks to fill the silence, sharing more stories as he remembers them. Bucky jokes about how small Steve used to be, how he could pick Steve up with one arm back in the day. 

Of course, the “back in the day” comment earned a snort of laughter from you. They are extremely old, despite not looking like it.

+++

Before you know it, you’re landing in Wakanda.

T’Challa and his sister, Shuri, greet the three of you outside the Quinjet. 

“You’re the famous Shuri we’ve heard so much about,” you joke. She’s a lot younger than you were expecting, but somehow that makes you love her a little more.

“He talks about me?” Shuri gasps, playfully nudging her brother’s arm. “What a shocker. You must be the one who talked some sense into his thick head.”

There is no muffling your laughter, not when Shuri is grinning, eyeing T’Challa for his reaction, which is a tired stare.

The King moves the conversation forward. “This is Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers,” he gestures to the two men beside you.

“Two broken white boys to fix?” Shuri asks, all in good nature.

“No, no,” Steve shakes his head. “I’m alright.”

You give Shuri a look, earning a laugh. Oh yeah. You’re going to love it here.

That’s if you’re staying-- if Bucky wants you to stay.

“Come, come,” Shuri turns and starts walking, motioning for you all to follow. “We have everything ready for you. And I think we have found a starting point on how to get all of that nasty HYDRA programming out of your brain,” Shuri gestures to her head with a look of disgust.

You can’t help but smile. That’s the best news of the day. If there really is hope for erasing all of HYDRA from Bucky’s brain, then you’re willing to believe in it.

Shuri leads you all to what you learn is Wakanda’s sort of hospital. It’s nothing like the kind in America. The blankness that would send any sane person spiraling if they were there for long enough. Wakanda’s hospital feels more like a home, a safe place where Bucky can get the help he needs.

You only say all this because you feel and see him physically relax when you enter the building. Some panic was still swimming inside of him, but you weren’t sure why, until now. He must’ve thought it was still too good to be true, until he laid his eyes on it.

You turn your head to look at him, offering a smile. He grabs your hand in return, squeezing gently.

“Will you be staying here as well, Captain?” T’Challa asks, seemingly out of nowhere. “We are happy to have you.”

“No, but I will visit,” Steve replies, sending Bucky a smile. “As much as he’ll let me.”

“You can visit whenever you want, punk,” Bucky shoots back easily, surprising himself.

“And what about you, Y/N?” Shuri asks. “I’m sorry I went snooping around on the background checks, but I could use a brain like yours around here.”

Bucky’s chest fills with confusion. Upon feeling this, you shrug and tell him, “My degree is in psychology with an emphasis on cognitive and neuropsychology.” You pause, suddenly sheepish. “You should’ve seen the look on my best friend’s face when I told her I was switching to that from history.”

“Didn’t you still minor in history?” Steve inquires -- basically throwing you under the bus.

“Yes,” you murmur. “With an emphasis on WWII.”

You feel it when some different emotion rises in Bucky’s chest, one you don’t think you’ve felt from him before. You can’t pinpoint it, but maybe that’s for the better.

“But to answer your question,” you chuckle, returning to Shuri. “I wouldn’t mind sticking around. If you’ll have me, of course.” You pause, tugging on Bucky’s hand. “And if you’re okay with that.”

“I don’t want you going anywhere, doll.”

“Good,” you murmur. “Because I’m not.”

Of course, this is when you and Bucky realize (yet again) that you are not the only ones in the room, which has Shuri grinning and T’Challa sharing a look with Steve.

Oh, well. You and Bucky have years of time to make up for. Everyone else will have to deal with it.

[kittydemon9000]

I wrote a thing for @anxiousworm‘s Spirit Kai au which has been living rent free in my brain for the last however long so ENJOY

In all his years of living, his first memories were both the worst and best of his life.

Granted, he was pretty sure they weren’t actually his first. He always had a vague sense he was missing something, something that came before, but alas.

He remembered standing before a rundown home, something inside pulling him like a tether.

He remembered passing through the door and the overwhelming smell of alcohol and empty bottles that littered the entire room.

He remembered following the tether to a small closet in the back of the house.

He remembered the soft sniffles.

He remembered the burning rage that filled his soul.

But it was nothing compared to when he opened the door.

Curled up in a tight ball was a young child, if he had to guess she was maybe three or four years old.

She looked at him with tear streaked cheeks and water eyes and mumbled a simple question.

“Who are you?”

“I….I don’t know.”

Her name was Nya, and she was the first of many children.

He remembered pulling her into a hug, only for her to disappear.

But he didn’t panic. Something about it felt….right.

He remembered the heat of the fires as they consumed the house.

He remembered the look of pure happiness when he visited Nya in Home, a place where no one but him and those he brought could go. A place where he could raise his Children in peace and happiness.

He remembered the first time she called him Brother, saying that he reminded her a lot of her real older brother, someone by the name of Kai

He was never able to find Kai, much to both of their disappointment.

So yes. They were his worst memories, but also his best.

And after Nya, there were hundreds more children, and he remembered every single one.

Most, he brought back Home, so he could raise them along with the others, but some he gave to new families.

A particular case that stood out to him was an infant. The father was always busy and didn’t care for him, oftentimes going weeks without even being in the same room.

He didn’t know how he knew these things, he just did.

Luckily, he’d found the infant a new home, in a scrapyard belonging to a lovely couple who’d sadly been unsuccessful in having a child of their own. Every once in a while he would check in on them, and they were doing a fantastic job.

Another case was a boy he’d found wandering the snow, lost and confused. He couldn’t explain what it was, but despite the child’s older exterior, he was still young. Very young with much of the world left to experience.

He’d brought him Home, but the boy only stayed a short while, claiming he wished to find his place in the world, and who was he to deny his request.

Then, a few months later, another child, this one running away from a special school. He always hated those places. What was the point of having a child if you were going to send them away to be raised by someone else?

But, alas, there wasn’t much he could do for him. He also brought him to Home, but he too wanted to go out.

Then…..there was Lloyd. Poor, sweet, not-too innocent Lloyd.

He had found him wandering the island, causing mischief as he went. But deep down, he knew Lloyd was never bad, simply misguided. Built up to be this great son of the dark lord, when really he was just a young boy who needed guidance.

He had at first hated Home, wanting to go back to Ninjago, but after a few days and some coaxing from the other children, he loved it. He realized there was no expectations for him there or a need to compete for attention. All of it was freely given.

He would never admit it allowed, but Lloyd became one of his favorites, right alongside Nya.

But beyond the troubles, life was good. His Children were happy, safe and learning from the security of Home.

But then there was the Great Serpent. The first of many tragedies.

So many children were lost, so many more lost their families, and even more were traumatized. Like the young Harumi, who had yet to speak a word since he retrieved her.

Then, there was the Stone Army, impenetrable soldiers who wouldn’t hesitate to kill the children they found.

He saved even less that time. He remembered being so terrified, thinking he’d failed, but actually they had been saved by The Protectors, but more on them later.

Then….there was the Golden Spirit.

The Golden Spirit was a creature of destruction and death and suffering. It’s aura was wicked and dark and threatened to consume him completely. It probably would have…..if it weren’t for the White Protector.

And oh the agony he felt when he was killed. He was tethered to every one of his Children, and losing one was already an unbearable pain. But, the force of his tether snapping was more painful than any time before it. Like he was truly being erased from existence.

Luckily he was returned soon, though the scars remained.

Which led him to now, standing before his Children.

“Who are you?” Cole demanded. “And why are you stealing kids?”

But he just smiled. “It is good to see you again, my Children. I hope life has been kind.”

Jay sputtered. “What are you saying?!? And why are you calling us your kids?”

But he just smiled. But of course, his Children were just confused. They’d been fighting for so long, never having a rest. He wanted to give that to them.

“You have been fighting for so long, it is time for you to rest.”

They went in guard. The leader stepped forward.

“We don’t want a fight. Just tell us why you’re taking children and we’ll go.”

“I do not take the Children. I am rescuing them.” He started. “I help them escape from families who do not love them, I give them places to stay when they don’t have any families at all, I show them the love they deserve.” He paused, looking them all over. “Just like I did for all of you.”

They all froze. “What are you talking about?” Zane asked.

It always hurt when he had to alter their memories of Home, but it was for the safety of all. However, he always kept the fun.

“Jay.” He said. “You were too young to remember, but when you were an infant and I delivered you to your parents, I did not leave you alone.” Jay looked perplexed, so he continued. “You recall the blue stuffed creature that you’ve had since you were young? What did you name it….Mr…..Mr….”

“Mr.Cuddlywhump!” Jay exclaimed. “I still have him!”

“Jay!” Cole hissed, but he was already beaming.

His Child loved his gift. He loved it enough to keep it well into his older years, something many didn’t do. I warmed his heart.

“And Cole.” he turned to him. “When you ran away, I was the one to get you somewhere safe.”

Cole glared. “No you didn’t, it was…...was…..” he trailed off, clearly struggling to remember.

“I had to erase your memories, in order to keep the others safe. You didn’t want to remain at Home, so I took you somewhere safe.”

He turned to the last of his Children.

“And Zane. I found you wandering the icy woods, lost and afraid. I brought you Home, then let you back into the word. Surely you recall a handful of years you cannot properly remember, yes?”

The silence coming from him was telling.

“Why did you let us go?” He finally asked. He felt his smile fall slightly.

“I do not mean to keep my Children captive. They all stay there by their own will. Once they are old enough, or if I find them a family, I let them back into the world. But, every child I have taken in, every single one, I watch over. And the second they need me again, I’m right back there.”

His smile fell away completely. “But I….I failed you. All of you. You were placed in danger time and time again because of my decisions. And in the end….” he looked to Zane. “it cost you your life. But not longer.” His cloak has started flaring up and a few of his fire lights started glowing brighter, but he quickly calmed himself. He didn’t want to scare his Children anymore than he already had.

“But that is why I’m here now. To take you back Home, where you’ll be safe once again.”

“Wait a minute, hold on, we can’t just leave!” Jay exclaimed. “Ninjago needs us to protect them!”

Oh boy, he thought this might happen. His Children were quite stubborn, it seemed.

He waved his hand. “The police can handle it. It is, after all, what they are supposed to do. You are children. Your job is to grow and learn, not protect an entire world.”

They started protesting, but he wasn’t having it.

“Hush now, you will be safe.”

He spread his cloak and carefully let it descend upon the and then….

They were gone. Disappeared and sent to the safety of Home, with all the others.

Hopefully they would get along with the other Children. They were definitely on the older end, but not completely out of possibility.

Nya, now quite far into her older years, would probably show them around. She was the only adult currently allowed in Home, but that may change someday. He never could bring himself to let her go, and it’s not like she wanted to leave either.

He looked to the moon, cursing at how late it had gotten. He still needed to check on a few of his Children living nearby, as well as check on the twins that lived nearby. He had a sneaking suspicion something was going on there.

Life for the Flaming Spirit, as the locals called him, was never over and never dull, and he couldn’t be happier.

[musictelevision]

The Sun and the Moon ☯

     “Tell me the story about how the sun loved the moon so  much, he died every night to let her breathe.” 

Emotional Tether Folklore: Two people, preferably benders, who are connected through spiritual interference. They are chosen at birth by two specific spirits. Throughout life, they both will experience feelings and visions from each other. This is a rare occurrence, it only happens every 100-200 years. Together, the two are powerful. Apart, imbalance will occur.

Summary: Y/N is the older sister of Sokka and Katara. Once their mother died, she step forward and watched over her siblings, even though she was only just ten. Years later, Y/N is travelling with her siblings, helping the avatar master all four elements. During this adolescence adventure, will she discover mysteries about herself she’d never imagined? All her life she has resented and ran from the Fire Nation. Now, could she possibly connected to the Prince of the Fire Nation himself? 

A/N: I’ve really gotten into ATLA in the past few weeks, so this happened. I really couldn’t just sit back and not write a Zuko fic. This will be multiple chapters, and will have semi-slow updates. A masterlist and helpful links for a smooth reading experience will be added. I am going to try to make it as accurate as possible. I hope everyone does enjoy, feedback is always accepted!

Warnings: violence, fighting, death, sad elements, cussing, blood, gore, adult themes (later on, will be warned on what chapter if it occurs) !!

Themes:  relationship developments, self love+hatred, acceptance, forgiveness, friendships, adventure !!

Soulmate AU?/Slow Burn/Connection (Unspoken)/Zuko x F!reader

Chapter One :  Beginnings  ☯

The Southern Water Tribe Village ☽

“My love, you should go to bed,” Gran-Gran whispered across the room. Sokka and Katara cuddled together in peaceful bliss, she did not want to wake them. Their father had left earlier in the morning, it had been an eventful day to say the least. With her father left, she couldn’t shake the fact that he would never return. In some ways, you could say, they were orphans. It only brought her thoughts to one sole person: Kya. It had been a few months since the deadly attack. She could still picture the beastly man looming over her mother. 

“Where is the water bender!” He forced once more. Y/N hid behind her mother in fear. They had been inside doing chores when the ships reached shore. Y/N shut her eyes pretending she was somewhere else, maybe penguin sledding with Sokka. Anywhere but here. He became more hostile, roughly moving closer towards the two.

“Where is the water bender.” They knew where the bender was, in fact she was in the same room, hiding for dear life behind her mother. The other, hopefully still alive, was outside with her brother. 

Y/N felt paralyzed. The big man pried even more, making some blows at Kya. Y/N could feel herself starting to bubble inside, her emotions were something to be reckoned with. She’d almost destroyed the entire village over a temper tantrum years prior. Though she was much older, her bending was not under control. It grew from emotion. Y/N noticed the ice around her cracking at every blow he made, Kya did too. 

He stood tall once more, shadowing over the two. Y/N thought death would be different, that she would die of old age. She hadn’t even lived to see the northern lights. 

“Mom!” Katara ran through the door only to be taken back by the large man in their home. The fire nation solider turned towards her, fury in his cold ember eyes. He seemed like he was getting impatient.

“Just let them go,” Kya finally said desperately, “and I will give you the information you want.” 

“Mom-” Y/N pleaded. She was in shock, would her mother really turn in her own daughters? Y/N wasn’t ready to go, but if it meant saving the tribe, she’d be willing to do it. 

“You heard your mother, get out of here!” the man hissed. Tearfully she ran over to Katara, holding on to her for dear life. Being her big sister, it was her unspoken responsibility to keep Katara safe. 

“Mom I’m scared,” the younger girl cried. Their mother looked at them, and smiled. 

“Go find your dad sweetie, I’ll handle this.” Kya spoke before facing the man once more. Y/N practically dragged Katara away from their childhood home, running as fast as they could to find their father. 

“DAD,” Y/N screamed. The ice she stood on cracked under her feet, yet she couldn’t care. The imagine of her mother’s fearful look swarmed her mind, it made her feel sick.

“Mom is in trouble there is a man in our house,” Katara shouted. Y/N held her hand tightly, making sure she didn’t loose her grip. They were the last water benders in the tribe. The two were vulnerable and easy targets, but she would never let Katara know that.  

“Kya!” their father cried out as he followed them back to their home. Sokka followed close behind. 

Her mother’s dead body laid on the floor. 

She didn’t want to remember the rest. Her father left to fight for their tribe after the devastating invasion. He seemed more, cold. Y/N couldn’t help but notice just how much Kya’s death changed him. Maybe his coldness was directed towards herself. She couldn’t bring herself to ponder that thought.

“Dad isn’t coming back,” Y/N remarked. Gran-Gran paused, calculating just the right thing to say. Sokka rustled in his sleep slightly, before settling once again. 

“I can’t shake the fact that he’s going to end up just like mom. Besides I am the reason mom is dead. No wonder Dad left, he can’t even look at me.” Gran-Gran shushed Y/N quickly. Sokka and Katara did not know the reason Kya died, and Gran-Gran wanted to keep it that way. It was Hakoda’s wish.

“Come child,” she waved the young water bender out into the crisp midnight air. Y/N followed the elder eagerly. The moon, full and bright, lit the entire village. The stars shined brightly, she thought of her mother. Kya always told her the magic of the night sky, how the moon and stars worked together so gracefully. Gran-Gran stood at the edge of the water, patiently waiting for the young girl to join her side. 

“When you were born, your mother suspected you would be a bender. That was a dangerous thing to be,” she paused with a long sigh. “However, the moon spoke to your mother the night you were born. The moon was the brightest it had ever been that night, the whole village awoke from its light. The moon shinned for you, and Kya knew that.” 

Y/N smiled to herself. She’d never known this much about herself before. It still didn’t make her feel better, why was Gran-Gran telling her this anyway? It didn’t change anything, her mother was still gone and her father still hated her. 

“But,” Gran-Gran continued abruptly. “The sun rose early that morning, bright as ever. It was as if the balance had returned for a day. We thought maybe you were the avatar.” They both sat in silence pondering her last statement.

The avatar? What a joke. Y/N had begun to believe such a thing never even existed in the first place. 

“I’m sorry I’m not,” Y/N muttered keeping her eyes fixated on the moon.

“No child, that is not your destiny. Your mother knew that you would be apart of restoring balance to the world, but just not in the way. The moon spoke to her. The great spirit told her to protect you from all harm.” Y/N’s eyes filled with tears, but she did not dare let them fall. Her mother was protecting her, she knew that the day she met her end. But to protect her over some prophecy a moon spirit said? It made her blood boil. 

“Of course, you won’t be alone in this.” Gran-Gran smiled to herself, leaving Y/N only to formulate more questions.

“Why would the moon find any sort of balance in me? Why would the sun react with the moon? How will I ever find another person to help me? This is so stupid, how do I know If you’re even telling the truth?  Gran-Gran this is ridiculous. No moon spirit cares about me! If they did they wouldn’t let her die or let dad go!” 

The eldest villager didn’t answered. She knew it was impossible to know. It was the truth, but it would take Y/N years to accept that. 

“Do not dwell on the unknown, it will be revealed when the universe allows it. What you do with this information is your choice,” Gran-Gran slowly confirmed before making her way back to her respected residence. 

“Ugh,” Y/N belted. She waved her hand towards the water before her in frustration. The water reacted with her swift movement, sending a wave towards the horizon. The sadness and confusion hit her, almost like a punch to the chest. 

She chose to never speak of the information Kanna gave her. It still plagued her mind every so often, but she ignored every aspect of it. In her eyes, she was a normal southern water tribe citizen.

But in the back of her mind she knew, that was far from true.

That night at the Fire Nation Palace ☽

Ursa had done what she had to. It was for him, her son, Zuko. She had protected him his whole life, just as she was instructed to. The sun spirit made that clear to her on the day of his birth. This incident was no different, just more drastic changes would have to be made.

She quickly made her way through the palace halls, her frail body still humming with adrenaline. Killing the fire lord, what was she thinking? Leaving now would only make it clear just who did it. Was being on the run from the crupt fire nation worth saving Zuko? A million times yes. Stopping to catch her breath, her attention caught by the bright orb in the night sky. It always gave her peace of mind, the moon. 

Azulon had instructed Ozai, her husband, to kill her first born. If only Ozai hadn’t spoken in such a heartless arrogant way, this wouldn’t have happened. To kill his child? It was horrible. He would do it though, if it meant keeping his honor. Ursa questioned why Ozai was so empty and power hungry. It was an answer she’d never know.

Some servants scurried pass her, bowing in the process. Did they know? They would soon, everyone would. She had to make herself scarce before then. The paranoia was sinking in ever so quickly. It was the only way to save herself, leaving. But, Ursa couldn’t help her mind race to Zuko. 

Zuko. 

The room he occupied was dark. There the young prince laid sprawled out on the crimson-colored king sized bed. Snoring slightly, he peacefully slept. The moon light coming from the window lit his raven colored hair perfectly. It felt wrong to wake him, he looked so content. But, it had to be done. For all she knew, it could be the last time she would ever lay eyes on her son. It was a little past midnight, in the morning the whole world would know. 

She sat on the corner of the bed next to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. Zuko had never been a heavy sleeper, especially with Azula as a sister. Her unless torment made him keen and aware of his surroundings, a good habit. 

“Mom,” he muttered groggily. Why was she here? His mind was still fuzzy.

“Zuko,” Ursa urgently spoke. Ursa quickly grabbed him by his sides, lifting her son up to face her. He blinked a few times, trying to focus with his tired eyes. 

“Please, my love, listen to me,” this made him try to focus more. Her voice was hoarse almost like she had been crying.  

“Everything I’ve done, I’ve done to protect you,” with this statement she pulled him into a hug. The last hug. She squeezed tighter than normal, he did not question it. 

She finally pulled away after what seemed like minutes. He was such a beautiful boy, how could she leave him? Would he parish without her? Would he be taken advantage of? Only the spirits could know. Footsteps could be heard in the hall outside his chamber. 

“Remember this Zuko,” she started facing him once more. Her voice was more stern this time, like she wanted to send a message. 

“No matter how things seem to change, never forget who you are,” her voice said in a whisper tone. Ursa hoped he’d listen, and take those words to heart. It was all she could do for him. From now on, Zuko would be on his own.

The prince watched her in tired confused as she turned towards the door. He wanted to say something, question why she had come, but he couldn’t. The tiredness was overwhelming, taking over before he could object. She sadly looked back once more, before pulling her cloak over her head. 

Hastily she ventured back trough the halls, leaving swiftly without a trace. By the time the fire nation caught word of their deceased leader, she was long gone. Just a memory. Ursa’s life she once knew was far behind her.

She looked up to the two spirits in the sky. The setting moon and the rising sun. Their harmonious relationship was on display in the sky. How wonderful the colors of the night collided with the morning sun, she thought to herself. 

“Watch after him,” the woman pleaded to the two spirits that occupied the sky.

“He will make you proud.” 

[chaseatinydream]

pirate king (70) || atz

As if fate had meant to play a cruel trick on you, the white ship docks just three ships away from the Treasure.

You stand at the starboard of the ship, watching the crew of the ship throw out the messenger lines and drop the anchor, fingers fisting so tight around the hull that your knuckles bleed white. It’s just a ship, you tell yourself in your mind as you watch the docking process, perhaps with a different crew and a different captain since so many years ago. The seas are treacherous after all.

But something dark swirls in you like a black, seething water. Wooyoung has always acted strong, been a warm comfort for you in times of darkness.  You’ve known that Wooyoung had been sold as a pleasure object as a child, having heard it from Jongho and the man himself, but seeing him like this, knowing the real darkness behind his abuse, it makes you want to destroy.

Bite marks, San had told you. Bruises, scratch marks... as if taking him against his will hadn’t been enough? What on earth had they done to him?

You glance back towards the sickbay, rolling your bottom lip between your teeth contemplatively. The desire to see Wooyoung is still a painful ache in your chest, but you push it down; you don’t know whether it will affect him adversely. With a heavy exhale, you turn around and step towards the kitchens. Perhaps cooking with Seonghwa will be able to distract you a little from everything going on right now.

By a stroke of luck, you manage to catch both Yeosang and Yunho chatting in the galley of the ship with cups of tea, Seonghwa working on some dried meat at the counter. They greet you when you come in, and you seat yourself next to them, placing your head on your arms.

“You doing okay?” Yunho asks and Yeosang pats your head tentatively as you let out a little groan and reach out a hand. The navigator immediately intertwines his fingers with yours, a sympathetic look on his face. “Not great, huh?”

“We’ve been hit by nothing but waves of bad luck since I joined this ship.” You mumble into your arms, but before you can say anymore Seonghwa sticks a piece of bread into your mouth, a faint smile on his face.

“I won’t allow you to say things like that in my kitchen.” He scolds gently and you sigh, bury your face deeper into the arms. “You know none of this was your fault.”

“It might not be, but it feels like it is.” You say haplessly, and Yunho’s face falls. He tries to brighten up the mood, however, reassuring you the best he can. “Don’t worry too much about it. Mingi went to talk with the harbor officials earlier to see how soon we can leave the town, and San and Captain are with Woo.”

“I know, but I want to see him too.” You sigh. Yeosang and Yunho exchange quick looks. “I don’t think that’s the best idea for now, Chin Hae.” Yeosang advises you, thumb running over the back of your hand and you swallow, eyes downcast. He was there for your own quarrel with Yeosang, and yet you can’t be there for him now. You hate this feeling of helplessness, being unable to do anything.

“Don’t feel too bad,” Seonghwa says, sitting next to you. “Wooyoung’s a strong boy, has always been. He’ll get through this.”

You don’t know what to say, fingers tracing the grain of the wooden table. Luckily for you, you don’t have much time to wallow in those terrible feelings because the door to the galley swings open, and you look up to see San at the doorway, mouth twisted into a small frown.

His eyes dart around the galley, searching for something, until they finally land on you. “Ahh, Chin Hae, I was looking for you. Come with me for a second?” There’s something about the way he says it that makes you feel uneasy, but you’re grateful to have a distraction.

Cocking your head to the side in curiosity, you rise to your feet, looking at your master. “What’s the matter?” You ask, and San gives you what you guess is supposed to be a reassuring smile, but you can see the nervousness in his eyes.

“It’s Wooyoung.” He says, and your heart lurches in your chest at the sound of his name “And he says he wants to go out with you.”

>>>

You’re confused.

Wooyoung wants to go into town, more specifically, go into town with you. At least, that was what San had told you as he led you out of the galley, and you turn to look at him quizzically.

“He wants to... bring me into town.” You repeat hesitantly, fingers drumming on your thigh. “... you sure he said that?”

“As sure as our captain is the pirate king.” San replies seriously, though you can see the lack of surety in his eyes. “Wooyoung told us he wanted to go into town, and when Hongjoong-hyung asked why, he didn’t say so.”

You make a face, staring right back him. “Isn’t it a bad idea for him to see me right now? I mean... considering that he’s...” You trail off. San puts both hands on your shoulders, squeezes you lightly.

“Hey.” When he speaks, his voice is low and serious. You look up at him, a lump forming in your throat. “I promise that none of this is your fault. Everything that happened and everything that happens, I’m glad that you came to be with us.”

A tiny, slightly rueful smile forms at the corner of your mouth. “You heard us talking earlier, didn’t you?”

San doesn’t reply, instead leaning down to drop a kiss to the top of your head. “You’ll be fine. We’ll all do our best to help Wooyoung, but don’t forget you too, are equally as important. Okay?”

You give a small nod. “Thanks, Master.” And not a second too late, because when you turn back to look at him, Wooyoung and Hongjoong are emerging from the sickbay, arguing over something that you can’t quite hear properly.

“You don’t need to come with us, I’ll be fine.” Wooyoung insists snappishly, as he pulls on the sleeves of his shirt, shackles jingling. Your captain sighs, exasperated, looking like he’s about to lose his temper. “Wooyoung, you can’t go into town alone with Chin Hae. It’s not safe, especially since you...”

Hongjoong trails off, staring at Wooyoung with conflicted expression, and Wooyoung bites down hard on his lower lip, eyes hardening.

“Especially what.” Wooyoung turns around to stare down at his captain, and next to you San swallows, fingers brushing your prosthetic nervously. You know San’s thinking about the last time Wooyoung beat Hongjoong up when he’d found out about your lost hand. Desperate to defuse the situation, you step forward and tug on Wooyoung’s arm gently to get his attention. To your surprise, he flinches and jerks his arm away.

You force a smile, arm dropping back to your side. “You wanted to head into town?”

“Chin Hae.” The smile barely touches the corners of his mouth. His eyes won’t quite meet yours. “I want to bring you around for a bit, but captain here,” he jerks his thumb behind him and Hongjoong’s pained eyes meet yours, “won’t let me go alone. He says he wants to come.”

“I think that’s fine.” You smile hopefully, and Hongjoong nods tightly. Wooyoung’s brows knit together, but then he sighs, turns away. “Whatever.” He mutters, moving towards the gangplank and Hongjoong lets out a sigh of relief behind him, thankful gaze meeting yours.

Good luck, San mouths at you and you and Hongjoong both chase after Wooyoung, settling into step beside him while Hongjoong stays a little behind, afraid of earning Wooyoung’s ire.

“So why did you want to take me out?” You ask Wooyoung, trying to lighten the mood as he leads you through the small shop houses that line the streets of Tortuga. But Wooyoung doesn’t seem to be in the mood for conversation, instead shaking his head.

“I just... I just wanted you to be there when I brought you somewhere.” He says quietly, eyes glancing back at the harbor, where the white ship still looms, you realise. Maybe Wooyoung hasn’t fled from his demons as well as he thought he has, and your eyes drift to the shackles still around his wrists. The chains are broken, but he still wears them.

Why?

The walk is relatively silent, with nothing but the sound of your footsteps and the chattering of townsfolk around you. Sensing that Wooyoung wants to be left alone for now, you fall behind a little, speaking quietly to your captain.

“So... Tortuga is a pirate town, am I right?” You ask, and Hongjoong gives you a small smile, nodding. You can see the unease in his eyes, but explains to you the history behind Tortuga in his usual calm, collected voice.

“Tortuga is a safe haven for pirates.” Hongjoong says quietly. “Where even the Royal Navy can’t reach because of how powerful it is. Its location is a closely guarded secret, only passed on from mouth to mouth. Did you see the small island on the way in?”

“No,” you reply honestly. You had been under the deck stitching together the fox fur, although you can’t tell him that.

“There is a small rocky outcrop, just a little way off the harbor.” He tells you, and you raise your eyebrows in surprise. “And on it there are cannons, prepared to blast any ship that is of the Royal Navy. Ships that do get to dock here pay an expensive toll to do so.”

“Is that why we can’t leave this place right away?” You murmur softly, and Hongjoong nods grimly. “You’re not allowed to leave before your docking period is up to prevent suspicious characters from leaving the town without taking responsibility. Fights aren’t allowed between crews of different ships either to ensure peace and stability within the town, and it’s punishable by death, so-”

“We could make it looks like an accident.” You mutter as Wooyoung takes the two of you down another alley, and out of the corner of your eye you catch a glimpse of the inn that the crew had brought you to after you had gotten your name.

Your heart warms at the sight, remember the happiness and memories that you had made that day. How much has changed since then, too? You look down at your lost hand. You’ve lost so much, but you’ve gained so much too. Wooyoung and Hongjoong and the rest of the crew have become your family.

Your treasure.

“We’re here.” Wooyoung says softly and you startle, nearly bumping into his back when you realise he’s stopped too late. Looking up at what Wooyoung is gazing at, your breath catches in your throat as you read the words inscribed on the marble building.

House of Pleasure.

Your blood runs cold when you look up at it, and Hongjoong lets out a little exhale next to you. “I’ll... give the two of you some privacy.”

You don’t really hear the chatter as the townspeople go about their business, or your captain’s footsteps as he moves away from the two of you. Instead your eyes remain firmly fixed on Wooyoung’s back as he stares up at the marble building before him. You can see how tense he is, and you swallow, wondering if he’s relieving his past, meeting his demons all over again.

“Why did you want to come here, Wooyoung?” You ask softly, suddenly afraid to shake him out of his reverie. The purple haired gunner doesn’t reply for a moment, completely silent and eyes fixed upon the building before him.

“This place... was both my prison... and what I thought was my liberation.” His voice is barely a whisper above the wind, hoarse with a single emotion; burning hatred. “When I was just a kid... barely understanding of anything... I thought that being hit... that being beaten... it was okay. I grew up that way since I could remember and thought that it was normal... to be treated like that.”

His voice shakes. It takes you a few seconds to realise that he’s trembling like a leaf in the wind.

No, you want to say, so desperately, no, you deserved all the love in the world, all the care, all the warmth, but the words seem trapped in your throat. You can’t say a thing.

“It was one day, I remember...” You can hear the way his throat tightens, look down in surprise to see your own fingers fisted around the hem of your shirt so tight you can’t feel them anymore. “I remember He brought me down from the ship, telling me that we were going to have some fun... that if I were a good boy-” his words cut off into a choked hiccup, “that he wouldn’t beat me anymore, that I would be rewarded.”

You know what’s coming next. You’ve heard it before, not once but three times, and yet when it spills from his mouth like this, the words tear your heart out of your chest.

“I don’t remember what exactly happened.” Wooyoung exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair. “All I remember was Him putting this collar around my neck,” he tugs at the thick leather strap around his neck roughly, “guiding me through the town... how big the doors seemed back then... and then...”

And then? You want to prompt, but no words leave you. Instead you stare at Wooyoung’s back, think of the young child he must have been back then. How scared must he have been? Alone, unloved, fed to the dogs like a raw piece of meat... how could anyone have done that to him?

“And then... all I remember was... a hazy mix of fear... like I was suffocating. I was drowning, and I couldn’t escape. I was only a child-” A pained, shuddering breath escapes him. “- and I wanted to die. And at the end of it all, I felt like I lost something... it wasn’t anything physical, but it was gone.”

You can’t seem to breathe.

“It happened again, and again... and again...” He shakes his head, as if trying to orient himself after waking up from a nightmare. “After Captain broke the chains on my shackles, I came back on my own. I wanted to prove that I was no longer that scared, terrified boy from back then.”

Wooyoung turns around to meet your gaze, and your heart breaks when you see the emptiness in his eyes. There are no tears, no sadness, no emotion. Just bottomless depths that lead to nowhere, that you could fall deeper and deeper into and be swallowed whole.

“The first time felt like taking revenge. The second time felt numbing, like alcohol.” You’re shaking with each word. “The third time... felt like running away. I kept coming back, wanting to tell myself, no, I’m not scared, and yet the entire time I was simply a coward, distancing myself from the people who had hurt me, afraid to confront them.”

He takes a deep breath, raises his hands. His face is drawn, white as a sheet , but he lays them on your prosthetic, and you can feel how much they’re trembling. “But then... I met you. You didn’t give me time to build up my defenses, and by the time I realised you were a woman, you were already in here. Then you nearly died after saving Yeosang, and I thought... so what if she’s a woman? What if I lose her?”

“Wooyoung-” Your voice comes out as a barely audible croak, but Wooyoung shakes his head, forcing the tears back. “I know you don’t love me back, but please, just stay by my side always, please, even if it’s as friends. I’m still a coward, but you make me want to be strong.” His voice is begging. “You’re my first step.”

“This is very touching,” A dry laugh comes from behind you and Wooyoung immediately turns to stone under your hands, pupils wavering. You turn around to see a middle aged man standing there, dressed in a black coat that shines under the midday sun, a matching top hat, and a polite smile. His slate grey eyes are colder than the northern seas in the winter nights. “It does my heart good to see you after so long... pet.”

“Y-you... you c-can’t... you can’t be h-here.” Wooyoung’s voice is weak with fear, lodged in the back of his throat. His words sound more like a whine that only a wounded animal would make.

What is happening?

For a moment you wonder who he’s talking to, but then you hear a weak whimper coming from behind you. That single sound is enough to grip at your heart, so painfully helpless that you can’t help but need to protect.

Then it hits you.

Wooyoung made that sound.

The man smiles. “Is that any way to greet your master, pet?”

You whip around in time to see Wooyoung dropping to his knees, eyes still focused solely on the man before him, as if he can’t see anything else. He’s shaking, so badly you can hear his shackles jangling. You call his name, but he can’t seem to hear you at all.

Master?

Wooyoung trembles, grovels and your heart drops. His forehead presses against the dirty ground, hands over his head and neck, body curled up as tight as possible, as if he’s...

... as if he’s trying to protect himself from a blow.

The man takes a step forward, footsteps soft against the cobbles and instantly, Wooyoung whimpers, body tensed, a soft stream of words falling from his mouth completely unchecked.

You can barely hear them.

“I’ve been a good boy, please, no punish me.” He sobs quietly into his hands and each word echoes in your ears. You feel strange, like you’re submerged underwater, viewing the world through the ripples of the waves above you. “I did what they asked, I followed, I was... I good, I promise...”

Your eyes fall on the shackles around Wooyoung’s trembling arms, the heavy silver locks that hold them around his wrists. Then you look at the man standing before you once more, and see the glint of silver hanging from a chain around his neck.

The key.

You can’t breathe.

It’s Him.

Before you know it, you’re lunging at him. Your chest feels empty, your head light, but your heart burns, so painfully that you need him to feel the same. You need to rip him into tiny pieces, the way the storm waves rip into the shore, to destroy him, to eradicate him from the surface of the earth.

One corner of his mouth turns up in a smile.

“Chin Hae, stop!” Your captain’s voice barely sounds in your ears, but then a pair of strong arms are wrapped around yours, dragging you away just before you can connect your fist with him. You thrash in his grip, snarling, but Hongjoong’s warning stops you cold. “Remember, breaking the peace here is a serious offence punishable by death.”

“But... but he-” You seethe, arms still straining against him, and Hongjoong grabs you by the cheeks to stare at him, one green eye filled with desperation.

“I know. But we can’t prove anything, and he’s not carrying a weapon.” He shakes you so hard you nearly see stars. “Wooyoung, he needs you, alright? And you can’t do that if you’re in a jail cell, waiting to be hanged.”

“What a remarkable captain.” The man says, and you look up, vision still tinted red, to see him clapping slowly as he steps towards you. Instantly, Hongjoong places himself between him and Wooyoung, his one eye burning with venom. “I’ll introduce myself; I was the quartermaster of the Phantom when you first... visited. I apologise that you had to meet the spineless coward that was our previous captain, I’ve killed him.” He says casually, as if he hasn’t just taken another human’s life in cold blood. “I’d like to-”

“Leave.” Hongjoong says, deathly quiet and a chill runs down your spine. His words aren’t even directed at you, but you can feel the sheer bloodlust radiating off him, making your blood run cold. “Get out of my sight before I chase you to the four corners of this earth, sink your cursed ship and drown you alive.”

“Your intimidation is delightful.” The quartermaster croons, and you instantly tremble. “The fire that burns in you... how destructive it is. How beautiful are the flames that will consume you along with everything you hold dear, Pirate King, Kim Hongjoong. Compared to that cold hearth that simply lies there and grovels,” he casts a pitying look at Wooyoung, and Hongjoong has to grab your arm once again to stop you from committing murder in broad daylight, although you swear you hear the bones in his jaw creak. “You are a fine pyre to build a sacrifice upon. The gods chose well, and he will most definitely be pleased.”

“Leave.” Hongjoong’s voice is barely a low snarl now. “I will not repeat my warning again.”

The man merely chuckles, before stepping past you, striding down the street. “See you soon, my dear pet.”

This time, you’re the one throwing your arms around your captain’s waist to stop him.

Wooyoung makes a whimper, and turns around on his hands and knees... before he begins to crawl after the man. You rush to him, horrified, but Wooyoung shakes his head jerkily, eyes lost to the world around him. “Can’t... make master mad... must obey... must... follow... or else... beating... It must be... good pet... follow... master...”

It... it?

“No, no, no,” you gasp, eyes immediately flooding with tears. “Wooyoung, no. You’re not an it, you’re Jung Wooyoung. You have a name. Hongjoong gave it to you, please, Wooyoung-”

He shakes his head, nudging past you to continue after the man even when you tug helplessly at him to hold him back. “He... mad!” A choked whimper escapes him. “Mad... mad is... angry... angry is... beating... beating... hurts. Don’t... want more... hurt...”

You’re about to break down in sobs, but then a hand comes out of nowhere, striking the side of Wooyoung’s neck. Immediately he goes limp, slumping to the ground and you race to catch him, cradling his head in your hands before it can hit the stones.

Your eyes meet Hongjoong’s.

“Let’s... let’s go back to the ship.” Hongjoong manage and all you can do, is to nod.

>>>

Wooyoung doesn’t wake.

The entire way back to the Treasure he sleeps, even as San and Yeosang break down at the sight of their best friend, even as Jongho breaks a wooden spear in half in sheer fury. He does not wake even as Seonghwa comforts Yunho, even as Mingi returns to find the ship deadly silent, even as your captain puts him down on your bed in the infirmary, even as the sun sets and the sky turns black as the sea beneath it.

You’re not sure which is better as you sit by his bedside, fingers carding through his hair gently as he sleeps. Even when lost in dreams his demons find him again, plague him with nightmares. He shifts, murmurs, restless, and you wish that he would wake up and stop making those heart wrenching noises, but aren’t sure which world is more terrifying for him.

San sleeps with Yeosang in the captain’s cabin tonight, unable to rest with the sounds of his friend’s soft whimpers in his sleep. You had offered to watch over him, knowing that you would be unable to sleep a wink tonight. Instead, you comb your fingers through his soft locks to calm him in his fitful rest, heart shattering with every pained noise he makes.

“He was wrong.” You murmur to him, voice trembling. “He said you have no fire but... Even when the darkness tries to smother you, you still burn so bright, Wooyoung.”

He doesn’t respond.

You were utterly helpless today.

You couldn’t do anything for him.

Wooyoung trembles, rolls over in his sleep to clutch at your hand, his shackles knocking together. The sound they produce ring in your ears, and his mouth moves near soundlessly. “Wooyoung?”

“Need... need...”

“What do you need, Woo?” You murmur, leaning closer. He whimpers, eyes squeezed tight, scratches at his wrists. “Free... need...”

You strain your ears to hear them more clearly. “Need?”

“Need... key.” You don’t process his words for a second. “Heavy... need... key... I need the key... need the key... to be free...”

The key.

Your eyes drop to the heavy locks around the broken shackles he’s wearing.

Right.

You gently pry his fingers off your wrist and get to your feet, striding to the table. Pushing a jar of dried herbs to the side, you grab your cutlass from the tabletop and tie it to your waist silently, eyes dark.

There’s no fear.

There’s only one thing for you to do.

This is the least you could do before you go.

Stepping back to Wooyoung’s bedside, you watch him sleep. One hand reaches down to pull the silver hairpin he had gifted you so long ago, and you wind it into your hair with firm hands.

“I’ll get it.” You say quietly as you leave the sickbay, a vow deep in your heart. “I promise, I’ll get the key, Wooyoung.”

You step off the gangplank, gaze focused only on the white ship sitting upon the waves.

Another promise to keep.

[goodlucktkachuk]

Frantic -- Matthew Tkachuk (Pt.2)

a/n: And by popular demand we have part two. Hope you guys enjoy!

Part One

------------------------------------------

Instantly a smile covered your face as you pressed confirm. Your instagram was nothing of scandal, mainly  paintings or doodles, a few pictures of you and Emily, and some vacation photos from last summer in Muskoka that you knew Matthew will enjoy. When Mitch reentered the room he shot you a puzzled look.

“What’s got you so chipper mini?” He teased, using the nickname your mom affectionately gave you when you were four and in a phase where you followed Mitch everywhere.

Chuckling, you shrugged your shoulders, “Emily sent me a really funny video of Nick in a facemask.” He laughed at the thought and the topic was dropped.

Around 1am, Mitch was blacked out on the couch next to you so you took the blanket you had wrapped around you and you tried to place it as softly as possible on your sleeping brother. After turning off the TV, you headed into their bathroom to borrow Steph’s makeup wipes. As you stared at yourself in the mirror for the first time that day and you could really see how tired you were. The all nighters of  homework and the rush and fall of going to games had started to catch up with you. You quickly slipped into Mitches closet and grabbed one of his old London hoodies and a pair of boxers. Once you found yourself in your pajamas and the warm embrace of the guest bed you flicked your eyes on your phone once again.

*Matthew_Tkachuk has sent you a message*

Intrigued by what the boy has to say you slid over the notification and unlocked your phone.

Matthew: first of all, what the fuck? Had I know it was you I wouldn’t have said what I said

Y/N: what?

Matthew: You didn’t think to mention that you're a mini marnie princess?

Y/N: why does it matter matty? Not like I live with him anymore. I’m an adult now Matty

Matthew: You’re still Mitches kid sister Y/N! I can’t just brush that off

Your chest ran tight after hearing him call you a kid. You knew you were younger but didn’t see the big deal about it.

Y/N: Oh give me a break, I’m 19, I’m all grown up now Tkachuk

Matthew: prove it, move this to snap and put your money where your mouth is ;)

Your heart fluttered in your chest but before you could enjoy it you found yourself mentally scorning yourself. This was your brother's old teammate and a family friend. Hell, you and Tayrn were attached at the hip everytime you two were together. There was too much history. Even though everything in your mind screamed no you found yourself accepting his proposal anyway before drifting off to sleep.

The next morning you woke up to find there was a sticky note placed firmly on your forehead. Pulling it off slowly, you flipped it over and it read ‘Went out for lunch with some of the team. Text me when you wake up’ The fact he couldn’t have just texted you that made you roll your eyes. You slowly lifted yourself out of the bed and started your staggered walk to the guest bathroom.

The sight in the mirror this morning was actually pretty cute. Your braids were slightly a mess from the night before but it went nicely with how Mitches sweater fit you and how his boxers hung off your hips. You snapped a picture of you throwing up a peace sign and posted it on your story with some witty caption about stealing Mitch’s clothes and looking better in them before hopping in the shower.

After departing from the warmth of the shower you changed back into your jeans from the night before and kept the sweater on. You ordered yourself some food and pulled out your laptop to get some school work done. Before you dove into art history and marketing techniques you opened a snapchat from Matt.

It wasn’t anything groundbreaking. He was sitting in a restaurant somewhere in a nice polo shirt. You could see half his face and his curls were pushed up with a red bandana. You stared at it for so long that you almost forgot to read what it said. ‘Snazzy hoodie you got there mini marnie, too bad it has the wrong name on the back’

You followed suit with your response, only sending half your face with a smirk plastered to your lips. ‘See Marner suits me so much better than Tkachuk so I think I’ll stick with this one!’

Matthew smiles at his phone. He was at a team lunch with the Flames and a few Leafs to catch up before they had to head back to Calgary. It was nice to see all the boys again, especially Mitch even though he had a different Marner on his mind. The lunch was overall pleasant even with all the dirty looks he had got from Auston any time anyone mentioned Y/N. As hard as it was for him not to spew endless chirps, he knew if he ever wanted a shot with you he knew he had to bite his tongue.

Deciding taking photos wasn’t the smartest way to hide what he was doing he texted you back instead. “Ouch Y/N that one hurt a bit. Hopefully in a few years you’ll change your mind ;)”

Y/N: In your dreams, Tkachuk. The team already has me destined to be with Aus so you gotta get in line.

Seeing those words made a fire erupt in his body. He knew you were probably just joking around but the idea of Auston getting to hold you made his blood run cold. Maybe that friendly warning wasn’t in the best interest of Y/N but Auston being selfish.

Matty: Auston has nothing on me sweetheart.

His words stopped you in your tracks. You never thought the juvenile feelings you had for Matthew would ever be reciprocated but here he was playing the game right back.

Y/N: I don’t know Matty, I’ve seen what Austons packing

As soon as Matthew read your text he slammed his phone down with a ‘Fuck’ that was a bit too loud making all the guys look at him.

“What’s your deal?”  Johnny asks, confused at his sudden outburst.

“Nothing.” Matthew says before he picks his phone backup and answers his text.

Matthew: I’m sorry what?

Before you answered, your mind drifted back to the previous summer. Mitch had invited the team and their girlfriends up to your cottage for one of the long weekends. It was a really fun weekend filled with drinking, boating, bonfires and even more drinking. On the last night there, Auston had a bit too much and proceeded to take off his swim trunks and run full force into the lake. Thinking it was hilarious, a few of the other boys followed suit. Unfortunately, because of where you were sitting when this happened, you saw a bit more of your brother's teammate than you would like to.

Snapping back to realted you messaged him back.

Y/N: you read what I sent

Matthew: tell me how good he was and then let me show you something better princess.

A mad blush crossed your face at the thought of Matthew showing you what he could do. You pushed those thoughts out of your head and began work on the lecture notes you were avoiding. Trying your best to push the thought of him having his way with you out of your head.

A few hours passed and the boys all crashed into Mitches apartment. Mo, Jake, and Zach set up shop on the bar stools across from you as Auston draped himself over your shoulders. Mitch leaned over the edge of the counter, all of them talking over each other. You missed having a house full of players all having fun. Matthew texted you again and you quickly turned your phone over before anyone could see it but you weren’t fast enough. Hearing your phone go off and seeing Auston look over your shoulder, Jake shot him a look to which Auston just shook his head and they both frowned knowing it was Tkachuk. Still typing away on your computer, Aus reached down putting his hands on yours and the pressure alone messed you up. As you went to scold him Jake interrupted you.

“So Y/N did you hear the Sandman and his girlfriend broke up?”

“I didn’t actually, I thought they were gonna get engaged?” Not looking up from your screen you tried speaking with as little interest as possible.

He shrugged his shoulders then continued “Guess it didn’t work out” He took a slight pause while Auston nodded at him  “Maybe you two should go out. Mitch mentioned at lunch you aren't seeing anyone.”

“I’m not sure dating another leaf is a good idea.” You responded still trying to feign interest.

“I think that would be a great idea.” Aus chimed in from behind you.

“I don’t remember asking what you thought, Auston.” You bite back.

You could cut the tension between you and Auston with a knife. After about a minute of no one saying anything, Mitch clapped loudly to catch the group's attention before he spoke.  

“Alright boys I think it's time for some Modern Warfare” The boys all nodded and headed towards the living room.

Auston leaned in close, whispering in your ear before going to meet the others, “It’s cause he’s young right? I know guys my age are more your speed these days.”

You flinched slightly, “I don’t know what you're talking about” You tried to say as smoothly as possible.

“If you say so, pest.” The last word basically being spat at you with a hostility you had never felt from him before. He finally let go of you and headed for the living room.

With that comment you had had enough and excused yourself to head back to your apartment. On your way down to the lobby knowing you were safe from the watchful eye of Auston and Jake you decided to answer Matthew.

Matthew: Y/N? Did I say something that's going to get me in trouble?

Y/N: Sorry, got distracted by some homework. Since when is Matty Tkachuk afraid of causing a little trouble ?

Part Three

[minijenn]

Keys Comm #6

Finally! The last baby of the bunch! This is another one for @rosie-drawss, who wanted a third part to the sort of ongoing series I've been writing for her in which Sora is brought back to the lights early in Keys. So if you wanna catch up to what the heck is going on here, I suggest you read:

Part 1

Part 2

Before reading this one! And with that, enjoy some family feels!

***

Sora sleeps far longer than Riku and Kairi do--understandably so for someone who’s gone without sleep for as long as he has. They lay in bed alongside him for a long time after they awaken, soaking in the peaceful silence as they both watch Sora peacefully sleep in between them. In many ways, it's almost too good to be true, like a dream they’ve both been having for such a long time now, finally coming true before their eyes. But this isn’t a dream; this is real. Sora is really here, really back in the space between them, back in their reach after so many months away. And even if it isn’t perfect, even if there’s still so much that needs to be done to truly save him, they still savor this moment for all its worth. They still savor being with him, even more now than they did before.

The quiet calm of their morning is soon interrupted by a soft knock on the door. It’s enough to finally wake Sora up at least to some degree as he lets out a tired groan, rolling over as he shoves his head under his pillow, muttering “five more minutes’, much to Riku and Kairi’s shared amusement. In the end, however, Riku is the one to encourage whoever’s at the door to enter, eliciting another loud moan of protest from Sora.

“Sorry,” Aqua whispers with a small smile as she pokes her head in. “We wanted to wait as long as we could to let you three get all the rest you need. But…” she smiles as she fully enters, toting a tray laden with pancakes, eggs, fruit, and hot drinks. “I did bring breakfast, if that makes up for it.”

Before either Riku or Kairi can thank her, Sora suddenly sits up, still clearly half asleep as he takes in a whiff of the appetizing meal Aqua brought in. “Did somebody say breakfast…?” he asks with a drowsy, hungry smile.

The others all get a good laugh out of this as Aqua sets the tray up for the trio, allowing them to eat it in bed as she prepares to leave to let them enjoy it in private. “Take your time, but as soon as you’re done, head on up to Master Yen Sid’s study,” she instructs. “He’s called a special meeting so we can talk about… e-everything.”

The trio’s mood quickly shifts at this, all three of them tensing up as they exchange apprehensive glances. Sora’s is by far the most anxious as he looks between Riku and Kairi, his fear palpable enough that they can both practically feel it themselves. Which is why they both rush to quell that fear as quickly as they can. “You don’t have to go if you don’t want to,” Riku assures.

“Yeah, we can always tell them you wanted to get more sleep,” Kairi adds just as supportively.

“...Well, that’s not really a lie,” Sora manages a smile, though it's soon broken as he lets out a long, loud yawn. “I… kind of have a lot of that I need to catch up on…”

“I’ll let the others know then,” Aqua says with an understanding smile. “Also, Sora, your mother wanted to know if you were up to a visit later on. She said she could be up right after she finishes cleaning the kitchen from making breakfast.”

“I figured these pancakes were hers,” Sora notes with a small smile. “Yeah, you can send her up. But I can’t promise I won’t be asleep by the time she gets here.”

“You can sleep after you eat,” Kairi grabs him by the arm before he can ease himself back under the covers. “And we’re not leaving until you’ve finished every last bite.”

“Alright, ‘Mom’,” Sora jokes as he takes the plate she’s offering him.

“Better curb that sass,” Riku says just as playfully. “Or we’ll tell your real mom.”

“Aw, come on, you guys,” Sora grins between bites of breakfast. “We’re not little kids anymore.”

“Then stop acting like one and eat your breakfast already!” Kairi shoots back as Sora sticks his tongue out at her.

Aqua leaves the room as their “argument” continues, laughing quietly to herself as she closes the door behind her. “I have a feeling that no matter what happens next,” she says to herself, hope filling her heart where there was little the night before. “Those three will be just fine now that they’re together again…”

***

Most of the meeting is largely a blur for Riku and Kairi. They stand toward the back of the study, solemnly listening to the guidance Yen Sid has to offer for their most pertinent plight. Occasionally, one of them will pitch in, largely for the sake of updating the others on Sora’s status based on what they’d seen this morning and last night. But other than that, they say nothing, allowing the others to debate on what they need to do and where they need to go next. Eventually though, they have no choice but to weigh in on the conversation, especially when the inevitable question finally arises.

“So… is there any way we can stop what’s happening to Sora?” Naminé is the one to ask it when she senses that Riku and Kairi are both far too anxious to.

Yen Sid is silent for a long time and the others all largely hold their breath as they wait to hear his verdict. In the end, however, it isn’t exactly one any of them were hoping for. “I’m sorry to say that there is no method to setting Sora’s heart free that I have been able to find in my extensive studies,” he informs them, his eyes shut and his tone pensive. “But that does not mean there is no hope in saving him. It simply means that we must resort to cutting down the darkness invading his heart at its very source.”

“Then it looks like our mission hasn’t changed,” Riku speaks up gravely. He pauses for a moment when he senses another nightmare about to befall Sora, one that he swiftly chases away so that he can continue sleeping in peace. But the mere audacity of that nightmare’s attempt at getting to him at all is enough to sharpen what Riku has to say next even more. “We have to defeat Xehanort, no matter what it takes. Even if there’s even just a chance that taking him out will set Sora’s heart free, it's a chance we need to take.”

“But… what about the rest of the Keys?” Mickey asks. “There’s still several more we need to find before the Organization does, and now that we have Sora back, they’re bound to try and take him away from us too.”

“If they’re dumb enough to to try that, then they better be ready to deal with every last one of us,” Roxas hisses, more than resolved to keep his other safe.

“That’s right,” Aqua readily agrees. “We’ll protect Sora and we’ll find those last few Keys. Even if we have to go our separate ways to do it.”

“No,” Riku counters, shaking his head. “Splitting up has never worked well for us before. That’s how we lost Sora in the first place. We need to stay together from here on out. We need to be a team.”

“So… what? Are we all just gonna cram together onto that tiny ship every time we need to go somewhere?” Axel asks, raising a skeptical eyebrow. “I like all of you guys well enough, but I don’t know about getting that close into everyone else’s personal space.”

“We don’t have to use the Gummi Ship,” Kairi suggests. “I can summon light gates we can travel through. They might be an even faster way of getting around, which is a good thing if we want to find those Keys as soon as we can.”

“The sooner we get them, the sooner we can confront Xehanort and hopefully put a stop to all of this,” Terra points out.

“But is it really safe for us to take Sora with all of us?” Ventus asks, worried.

“Even if we’re all together, then the Organization could just as easily come together to attack all of us to try and take him away,” Xion adds just as fretfully. “And if we can’t protect him from them, then-”

“Aw, phooey!” Donald suddenly snaps. “If they wanna get their hands on Sora, then they’ve gotta go through us first!”

“Yup!” Goofy boldly chimes in. “We’re not about to let anyone else, not Maleficent, not the Organization, not even Xehanort himself, take him away from us ever again!”

“No, we won’t,” Riku nods, resolute. “And not only are we going to keep Sora safe, we’re going to make him feel safe too. When I found him last night, he was so… terrified. I’ve never seen him like that before, and to be honest, I don’t want to see him like that again. He’s not just scared of what’s happening to him. He’s scared of the possibility that he might accidentally hurt any one of us too. That’s why we have to make sure he knows that won’t happen. He’s safe here, with us, and it's up to each and every one of us to help him really believe that.”

The others all immediately agree to do exactly that, to help Sora ease his way back into the fold of family and friends he’s spent such a long time running from. To help him feel like he’s finally back to where he truly belongs. As the others begin brainstorming ways to help provide him with that comfort, Riku and Kairi exchange a small smile, glad that they have such reliable friends who are all every bit as dedicated to Sora as they are. Glad that they aren’t alone in wanting to not only set his heart free, but helping it heal as well, no matter how long that healing might take.

“Do you want to fill Sora in on the game plan or should I?” Kairi whispers, aside.

Riku shakes his head, his steady smile widening as he takes in the air of warm earnesty spread by his fellow lights. “We’ll all tell him,” he says simply. “Together, just like how we’re going to be from here on out.”

***

Himari is nothing if not an incredibly patient woman. She’s waited for her son to return to her before, waited to hear any sort of word on where he is or how he’s doing, waited for Riku to bring him back as soon as she arrived at the tower last night. And now, she waits for her son to awaken from his slumber, a soft, if not somewhat sad smile resting on her face as she hums the lullaby his father used to sing to him, stroking a gentle hand through his mostly white hair.

“Oh Sora…” she whispers, more to herself than to him. “I know you said I have nothing to be sorry about, but… I can’t stop thinking about how different things would be if I had just kept you home… If I never let you leave then… m-maybe… maybe you wouldn’t be…” She cuts herself off as she fringes on a sob that she only narrowly suppresses. “What kind of mother am I?” she shakes her head, forlorn. “I can’t even do a single thing to help my son when he needs it most… If only you were here, Ki…” Tears finally slip down her cheeks as her fingertips ever so softly skim the crown charm resting around Sora’s neck, a necklace that used to belong to her husband before him. “You’d know what to do about this. And even if you didn’t… at least you’d know what to say to make me feel better about it…”

Himari starts, a surprised gasp slipping out of her when Sora suddenly lets out a small laugh. “C’mon, Mom, Dad was never the one who knew what to say,” he remarks as he opens his eyes, smiling as he sits up in bed. “He always used to say you had ‘a way with words’ or something like that. I never got what he meant back then but I-” He stops himself, his casual manner falling to pieces when he meets his mother’s tearful gaze. She forces back those tears as best she can, a hand held over her mouth as she struggles to be strong for him… and fails miserably at it all the same. “P-please, Mom,” Sora implores her as steadily as he can. “Don’t cry. I don’t want to… I-I’ve already cried so much by now a-and if you cry then I know I will--even if I try to stop myself, I can never stop myself anymore--and I just-”

Himari cuts him off abruptly when she throws her arms around him, pulling him into yet another tight, yet comforting hug. “I’m not crying about that,” she tells him in a whisper. “I… it’s just… it’s been such a long time since I last saw you. You’ve grown so much in just a year… I’ve missed out on so much…”

Sora sighs, his guilt growing to the point that he soon finds he can contain it no longer. It pours out of him the same way his tears do, rapid and remorseful as he struggles to say everything he knows he needs to, everything he knows he owes her after how long he’s been gone. “Mom, I… I’m so sorry… When all of this started to become… t-too much for me, I wanted to come home, just like you told me to, but I was so scared that you wouldn’t want me if you saw me like… like this, so I ran and I-”

“Oh, Sora, sweetie, no,” Himari cuts him off, her voice soft and kind. “Even if you do look different, even if you have changed… you’re still you… You’re still my son, a-and I still love you so, so much, Sora… Please,” she pulls away, still holding his face in her hands as she offers him a tearful smile that’s as bright and warm as the sun itself. “Don’t ever forget that…”

“I-I… I won’t…” Sora says, despite his amazement, despite his awe that she could still love him after he’s strayed so far from home, so far away from her. But she loves him all the same, every bit as much as he loves her, and for as safe and secure as that love makes him feel here and now, that’s something he has no intentions of letting go of again anytime soon.

It isn’t long after this that a knock sounds at the door. Sora and Himari compose themselves quickly before Riku and Kairi enter first, though the other lights soon file in after them. The bedroom is a rather small one, but they all cram in to make space, each of them wearing hopeful smiles as they prepare to share their newfound plan with Sora. A plan that they have the utmost faith in, despite how uncertain everything else surrounding it might seem.

“So we’ve decided that we’re all going to look for the last few Keys together,” Kairi begins brightly. “And that you’re coming with us, Sora.”

“If you want to, that is,” Riku quickly cuts in, knowing the last thing he wants is to force Sora to do something he’s not comfortable with. Not now when he’s still clearly struggling to trust them all again. “If you don’t, that’s fine. We can always take you and Himari back to the islands, and a few of us can stay behind to make sure the Organization doesn’t-”

“No,” Sora interrupts. He stops briefly, offering his mother an apologetic glance. “I’m sorry, Mom…” he whispers to her. “But… I have to go again. They won’t be able to find those Keys without me, they need my help, I-”

“I know,” Himari says with a sad, tired sigh, far more used to this than she knows she should be. “Just… come home to me quickly this time, ok?”

He smiles when she skims the side of his face again, her gentle, loving touch a comfort he can’t help but cherish after having gone without it for so long. “I will. As soon as we have that last Key, I’ll be home on the islands with you again. I promise.”

Himari nods, accepting that promise as she offers a hand to help him stand. “I’m going with you,” he tells the other lights, his tone as determined as it can be. “I-I want to go with you,” he corrects himself, not wanting to sound like he’s doing it out of obligation. Even if he is. “I’m sorry I ran away before, but… I want to be a part of the team again, i-if you’ll have me, after… everything.”

“You’re kidding, right?” Axel speaks up with a small, incredulous laugh. “We weren’t much of a team at all without you around.”

“You were our missing piece, Sora,” Ventus adds, smiling kindly. “You’re the one who helped bring us all together to begin with. We wouldn’t have stopped until we brought you back too.”

“So quit feeling sorry for yourself already,” Roxas teases, crossing his arms. “And just accept the fact that we all missed you way more than you thought, ok?”

“And that we’re all so glad you’re finally back safe and sound,” Naminé chimes in warmly.

“And that we’re gonna stick right by your side,” Goofy concurs.

“No matter what the Organization might do to stop us!” Donald pipes up resiliently.

Sora can’t help but let out a small, practically elated chuckle at their shared enthusiasm. As he realizes just how wrong everything his master had told him had been. As he realizes just how much his friends really do care after all if they’re willing to go to such great lengths solely for him. “So,” he says, looking to Riku and Kairi as he takes the hands they’re both extending out toward him. “I guess we’re doing this together then?”

“Yeah,” Kairi smiles as Sora slips his hand into hers, more than ready to embark on whatever journey awaits them next.

Riku does the same when he takes Sora’s other hand, determined to do everything in his power, to give anything he has to just to make sure he’ll never have to let him go ever again. “Together.”

Commissions are Closed!

[tsarisfanfiction]

Crack

Fandom: Thunderbirds Rating: Teen Genre: Angst/Family Characters: Scott

This is entirely @gumnut-logic‘s fault.  ‘Twas her suggestion that got my muse raving away, therefore we are blaming Nutty for this.  Also in typical Nutty style, it’s apparently not content with only being a oneshot, so there will hopefully be a follow up to this later.  I’ll hold off on crossposting this until I know for sure, but from the ruckus in my head from certain brothers, I think more is likely.

When a storm gets too intense for Thunderbird One to fly, Scott has to hunker down and wait it out.

Scott loved Thunderbird One. She was his other – better – half and he’d racked up more flight hours in her than any other craft during his extensive piloting career.  Together, pilot and Thunderbird, they had faced down many situations, and together, they always got through.  State of the art, the very cutting edge of aeronautical engineering and kept that way through constant upgrades from Brains, there was very little that could stop her.

Not even Scott was willing to pilot in this storm.  It had been fine – some buffeting winds and even some sheering ones as they’d danced around the mountains together, collecting stranded and struggling climbers – but barely moments after he’d dropped the shivering but grateful people off safely at base camp and got back into the air, it had turned severe.

Worse than severe.  Thunderbird One had told him, loudly and with many red holograms, that she was not interested in flying in this weather, Scott, and through a crackled line with storm interference, John had been saying something, too.  He hadn’t heard what, but he hadn’t had to.

Scott knew he had a reputation for recklessness.  He also knew that he was stubborn, and a damn good pilot.  It was that latter point that had had him guiding his weather-tossed Thunderbird onto the first clear and stable area he could find to wait out the storm.  Contrary to popular belief, he knew exactly what his limits were.

This?  This was beyond them.  Thunderbird One, as amazingly beautiful a craft as she was, had sacrificed much in the way of stability for speed and manoeuvrability.  Winds whipping around crags with no discernible pattern, and too many jagged edges waiting to snag a plane that blew too close, were the worst possible flying conditions for her.  Scott had no intentions of adding to the list of names in their family that had met their end to a mountain or in a plane crash.

There were too many names on that list already.

Hopefully, this wouldn’t last too long.  With the weather disrupting signals from Thunderbird Five, he couldn’t even tell John that he’d landed safely, let alone get any data on the storm itself.  Scott might not have been able to hear John’s last transmission, but he’d got enough data from it to know his brother was worried. With his reputation for recklessness, there was a reasonable chance that his family feared he’d try to make the journey home regardless.  Radio silence for too long would do nothing to abate their fears.

Scott just hoped the rest of his family were safe, wherever they were in the world right then, and not caught up in this or another storm.

There was a crack that could have been lightning, or could have just been something shifting under the unrelenting winds on the peaks around him.  With his link to Five disrupted, he couldn’t check the weather data, and leaving the safety of his warm, dry Thunderbird to investigate didn’t appeal to him in the slightest.

He wasn’t scared of mountains, but he was never going to forget the day one claimed Mom’s life. He was also cold and wet from his earlier forays into the weather, before it got quite so terrible and he was still saving lives.  There was a spare uniform in a locker in the cargo bay, and towels to dry off. Logically, the sensible thing to do would have been to take the time to get changed, rather than sit in wet clothes, water dribbling down his face from where his hair had got wet at the base camp. He shouldn’t have taken the helmet off, but talking to people with it on once they were out of danger always felt a little too impersonal.

Scott’s relationship with logic was somewhat on and off.  While John stuck to it like glue and his one true love (a title also shared between space and physics), Scott listened to it when it suited him.

With his communications all cut off by the storm, there were no witnesses.  Cold, wet, and memories of Mom’s final hours a little too close for comfort, Scott pulled his knees up to his chin, muddy boots cramming on the edge of his seat and arms wrapped around his shins to keep them in place.

Outside, the wind howled threats, a combination of haunting shrieks and furious bellows.  Rain lashed down hard on the cahelium hull of his Thunderbird, a constant thundering that echoed around the enclosed space and sounded much too loud for drops of water.  Randomly, One would shudder as a gust buffeted her too hard from one side, or whipped around under an extended wing, trying to force her up into the air.

All the grapples at her disposal were firmly deployed.  The ground she was perched on was more likely to peel away from its surroundings than she was from it; Brains took no chances, and Scott was thankful for that. Still, every time she juddered, or leaned slightly to one side, his grip on his shins tightened.

He wasn’t scared. He just knew that in the face of nature, he was insignificant.  The storm and mountains didn’t care for a single, squishy human in a plane.  If they ever did, International Rescue wouldn’t be needed.

Mom would still be alive.

Scott trusted Thunderbird One and the genius behind her with his life, but that didn’t make it any easier to be stranded in similar terrain to where Mom had taken her last breaths.

Water dripped from his hair onto his knees.  There was the familiar sensation of mud on his face, no doubt rubbed there by the uniform he was pressing it against.  Something wet trickled down the back of his neck, slipping inside his collar.

He should get changed. Dry off, at least, but it was so long since Scott had last been truly alone that those ideas were barely fleeting observations in the back of his mind.  Even if he was shaking as the cold seeped in, past the neoprene defences and deep into his bones.

It was definitely the cold, and not fear.

Scott wasn’t scared.

Just alone, with the wind experimenting how many different eerie and threatening noises it could make and nudging at the single man-made item in its clutches as though determined to tear it from the mountains.  With the rain, hammering down with what sounded like enough brute force to dent the metal.

With the periodic cracks that could be mountainside or lightning.  Cracks that sounded too much like the one he heard when he was fourteen and the mountain stole his Mom.

The crack that changed his life forever.

Trembling fingers clung harder to neoprene-covered calves, arms wrapped so far around his legs he might as well have been a human pretzel.  More moisture seeped through onto his knees, too close to where his eyes were pressed to be a coincidence.

He wasn’t crying, the water from his hair had just run into his eyes on its way down his face.

Thinking about Mom hurt. Somewhere in his heart, Scott knew that he’d never properly mourned her.  Sure, there had been the funeral, and the sombre air of tragedy permeating through their home that had never really left, but when Mom had died, Dad had been on the Moon and there had been four tearful faces looking up at him.

Four little brothers that needed him.

By the time all four little brothers maybe didn’t need him to always be there, he’d been nineteen and then the Zero-X had happened and-

Scott cut his thoughts off there.  Mom was one thing.  Dad another. Both simultaneously was more than he could handle.

His brothers came first, always, and he’d pushed his own grief into a box in the back of his mind to be dealt with later – a later that still hadn’t come.  A later Scott kept pushing back further and further because he had to be strong and time alone was a rarity.  Even his Air Force stint had seen him surrounded by squadmates and never a moments’ peace.  Now, with International Rescue and at least one brother only a word away at all times, he was still never alone.

This storm, these howling winds and lashing rains and maybe-lightning-maybe-mountain cracks, was the first time he’d been alone.

Scott gripped his calves so tightly he pinched the skin against neoprene and tried not to jump when another, louder crack split the air.

Closer.

It was probably lightning, logic told him.  These mountains were ancient bastions of stability, not known for excessive rockfalls or worse.  For John, that would be enough.  John could cling to logic and shut out the niggling doubts in a way Scott sometimes found himself envious of.

Scott’s own hold on logic, less than tight at times, didn’t let him find security in the thoughts.

He was safe in Thunderbird One.  He knew that. The harness was still lowered, and despite his boots muddying up the edge of the seat instead of the footplates, he was secure.  Cold, wet and definitely only trembling from those two factors and nothing related to those cracks, but secure.

He should dry off and get changed, mitigate the shivering and cut off any reasons for the medics of the family to eye him critically and declare him grounded until they were confident he wasn’t going to get sick, but that meant leaving the seat.

The fourteen-year-old whose life had been irrevocably changed by a single crack did not want to leave the seat.  With no witnesses to see the teenager he’d never really got to be yanked to the surface by a storm, Scott couldn’t bring himself to move, either.

He wasn’t scared. There was no fear paralysis kicking in and keeping him there.  He just… he just…

He just remembered that day too well, and it established itself more and more firmly at the front of his mind with every crack that snapped into his ears.

He just wanted his Mom back.

It was nearly half his life ago, now, since she’d been stolen.  Another year and he’d cross over into the unstable realm of having lived longer without her than with her.

Everyone thought he was a Dad’s boy.  Of course they did; he’d always looked up to his father, watching his exploits with wonder on his face and a determination to follow in his heart.  But Scott remembered long months without Dad, when he was off on the Moon or even Mars and it was just Scott, an ever-increasing number of little brothers, and Mom.

He loved Dad, but it was Mom that had raised him.  Dad had been – still was – his hero, but Mom had been Mom.  Mom had taught him to be kind, demonstrated what unconditional love meant and even tried to get the little boy who always had to go fast to understand patience.

Then she was gone and he tried his best to pass those lessons down but he’d never been as good at it as Mom.  She’d been such a huge influence on his life, but in a year he’d have lived longer without her than with her, and that box of grief was still stuffed in the back of his head for a later that would never come.

A later that sensed he was alone and all his excuses why he couldn’t address it now were being blown down by an aggressive wind or washed away by a torrent of rain.

Crack.

He didn’t remember what Mom looked like.  Not exactly. Sure, he had photos, and old holovideos, but things got lost, like the exact colour of her eyes, or the aura of love she exuded no matter what.  He didn’t remember her perfume, or even if she’d worn any.

He didn’t remember the last thing she said to him.  It could have been don’t forget your gloves, or keep an eye on your brothers or it could have been something else entirely.  When the topic came up with his brothers on the rare occasions they talked about her, the day, he lied and said it was go carefully and I’ll see you at the bottom.

He just remembered the crack, and a faceless man saying sorry, kid, but she didn’t make it.  Remembered four terrified faces looking up at him and needing their big brother to fix something that could never be fixed.  He’d tried anyway.

Thunderbird One lurched again, fighting the storm trying to fling them away from their relative safety lashed to the ground, and Scott jerked against the harness like a rag doll.

He didn’t ease his death grip on his legs.  Couldn’t. Pressed his forehead tighter to the apex of his knees and let more mud from the uniform smear his face, mingling with the water running down the skin.

The storm would pass. Thunderbird Five’s connection would be restored and then he wouldn’t be alone again as John hovered for the entire flight home and the rest of his family chimed in over comms.  Scott knew that, clung to it as he tried to drive his fourteen-year-old self back into the box he should never have left.  Tried to shove the memories, both the faded and the too clear, of Mom back in that box, before the thoughts overwhelmed him.

He just had to sit, cold, wet and shivering with boots muddying up the seat, in the safety of Thunderbird One and wait out the storm.  Then he could go home, get changed and dry off and do his best to ignore the disapproving clucks from the family medics as they threatened him with the words trying to make yourself sick and grounded.  Then everything would be normal again and the box in the back of his mind could be brushed aside for a later that he never wanted to come.

Crack.

[itswildwinters]

Hello lovelies and welcome to my October 2020 fic recs. These are the fics that I read these last few months. The main pairing is Louis Tomlinson/Harry Styles.

This is also an appreciation post to all writers out there. Thank you for contributing so much to the fandom, for making all these incredible pieces of work for us all to read!

I’m wishing you all a happy Halloween in advance!

If you check out any of those incredible fics below, don’t forget to leave kudos and comments to show your appreciation!

Enjoy!

From What I’ve Tasted of Desire by @evilovesyou 

When Louis moves to the small Scottish town of Fortrose to spend some time with his father, he thinks he's come to terms with the fact that the next two years of his life will be rainy and dull. That changes when he meets the ever-elusive Harry Styles in his Biology class and he makes it his goal to find out the big secret surrounding him and his family. Louis unexpectedly finds himself in the eye of a storm of secrecy, age-old myths, friendship and romance.

Twilight AU / Vampires / Werewolves / Slow Burn / Highschool & College AU

eyes off you by @soldouthaz

“Just promise me you’ll do whatever it takes to keep us all safe while we’re in there,” Liam says.

Through the crack in the door, Louis can just barely make out the broad curve of Harry’s back, the slope of his curls as they tumble down all sleep-soft and lazy, and the sharp twist of his arm - all leading down to where he’s got his pointer and middle finger crossed over each other behind his back.

“I promise,” he tells Liam firmly, “I promise.”

--

or; a charlie’s angels inspired fic where louis is the brains, harry is the charm, liam is the muscle, and niall drives the getaway car - and zayn is there, too. sometimes.

Action / Pining / Assassins (kill bad people)

Walls by Travis_Crux 

Following his line of sight, he frowned and shook his head, "What's wrong?"

"Wasn't your timer on your ring finger?" Liam asked, at that the Alpha immediately swapped the tumbler and looked down at his finger which sported a string of tiny blue flowers on the underside of his ring finger.

The two of them looked at one another.

"You could've touched nearly fifty people by the time you grew delirious," Liam advocated, always the voice of reason. "Comrades, nurses, doctors."

Sighing, he turned away and continued drinking the water. Literally, the only fucking thing remaining in the middle of a fucking war.

Or

Harry has his soulmate timer stuck at zero from the beginning of time but suddenly the fates show mercy and a lovely forget-me-not takes the place of his timer. In between finding his soulmate in a war camp and solving the puzzle of the charismatic doctor who is treating him, all he can hope for is to live.

ABO / World War I / Soulmates / Angst / Hurt-Comfort

works like a charm by @falsegoodnight

Ever since Louis joined the team in fifth year, a few facts have become set in stone.

One: Louis is the best chaser in Hogwarts.

Two: Harry is the best beater in Hogwarts.

Three: They do not get along.

So it’s really unfair of Liam to think that forcing them to spend time together as Louis recovers from his injury will make them the best of friends. The last thing Louis would do is get along with that git.

Harry Potter Setting / Porn With Plot / Enemies to Lovers

(quiet like a fight) fingers laced together by @letthemkissyou

It’s a thin hope, frail and as thin as the silver strands of a spider web, desperate in the way Louis keeps clinging onto it even when he’s already expecting and preparing for the worst. Maybe one day, he’ll have a home, a place where he can feel safe and sound, tucked away safely from the world that has the tendency to treat him horribly and then even worse, that maybe there will be someone in his life who cares for him, even if in the smallest of ways, and does not just use him for whatever they tend to need at the moment.

Or, the one where Harry is gifted a hybrid and it's a whole new world for the both of them.

Hybrid Louis / Past Abuse / Fluff / Angst 

We’ll Cast Some Light (You’ll Be Alright) by fondleeds 

There’s tense silence, the whole room completely hushed. The other teams on surrounding tables look between each other. Then, Louis pushes himself away from the table noisily, chair scraping. His face is angered and crumpled, red at the ears. The door slams behind him as he rushes out. The surrounding teams look at Harry simultaneously.

“God, Simon is going to kill us if we don’t die on this mission first,” Niall moans into his hands.

-

There’s a standard procedure for this. Scan, track, kill. But with a solar eclipse and a Greater Demon with unfinished business looming, the path to keeping England safe from harm becomes complicated and shadowed by mystery and secrets. For Harry and his team, times have never been harder, especially when a few old friends turned foes show up. Harry is left with just over forty days to overcome the hurdle of tension between them and reconcile their past, and figure out just what Louis is hiding from him before it’s too late.

Demons / Enemies to Lovers / Violence / Angst / Fluff / Demon Hunters / Smut

Three Days in February by @mercurial-madhouse

“We have to get out of here, outside,” Harry whispered, turning his hand in Louis’s grip to hold on and pull them both to their feet. “And how do we fucking do that?” Louis hissed, carefully rising and pulling Harry to his feet before Harry could do it. His gaze darted to the front then back of the arena. “None of the doors are where they’re supposed to be.” “What?” Harry looked around again too, couldn’t see any doors, only knew that they must be there, somewhere. “How do you know?” Confusion slid over Louis's features. “Because we’ve been here before, Haz. It’s the O2.” The show. It must be the first night of their tour. They were too late; they were out of time.

Louis is cursed after a night out with the lads and the five have just three days to figure out what happened and how to break it before Harry and Louis both lose their sanity and maybe something more. Louis can hear everything Harry thinks and Harry isn’t sure he can keep his feelings for Louis a secret from his own mind.

Ridiculous amounts of banter and angst, a lot of Harry and Louis alone together, a healthy dose of OT5 friendship, and one very magical weekend.

Friends to Lovers / Fluff / Angst / Action / Adventure / Magical Realism / Hurt-Comfort / Slow Burn

Soaked In The Blood Of Angels by @crazyupsetter

The boy looks drugged, caught between a man who’s almost twice his size and a girl who looks like she wouldn’t even break a sweat snapping him in half despite her small stature, eyes closed and mouth open as he pants, arching up between them almost as if he’s trying to escape.

Normally, Harry would ignore it and continue on his search for someone to drink from, someone who wouldn’t mind his sharp teeth and rough hands. He’s seen plenty of boys like this one, ones who picked the wrong playmates, and if he stopped to rescue every single one of them he would have died from thirst a long time ago.

This one, though. There’s something about this one, the sheen of his bright blue eyes as he blinks slowly, looks around as though he doesn’t know where he is, the weakness of his hands as he tries to push the girl off of him and make his escape.

Explicit Sexual Content / Vampires / Incubus / Dubious Consent / Blood / Violence

The Compulsion to Find Love by Toomanytears

The most prestigious English third-level institution, Candling University, accepts omega students for the first time and Louis Tomlinson applies with bright eyes and brighter ambitions. There he encounters personal obstacles, traditional mindsets and a beautiful boy who inverts every prejudice Louis has ever known.

ABO / Omega Louis / Alpha Harry / Worldbuilding / Slow Burn / Fluff / Angst

Just a bit of work by missyoutoosweetscheeks

It was quite painfully pathetic, really. Twenty five, stable job, stable flat, stable mind (well, quite), a painfully non-existent love life with an even more painfully intact virginity.

Marcel didn't think his life was going to get better with his painfully aparent sociopathic tendencies to block anyone who showed interest in him.

Until, of course, he became Louis Tomlinson's next prey.

OR

In which Marcel is a virgin, and becomes his office's amorous co-worker's next big conquest.

Top Harry / Bottom Louis / Office Sex / Dubious Consent / Porn Without Plot 

Fuck U Betta by @jacaranda-bloom

There’s something about having Louis like this, exposed and desperate, that makes a primal urge bubble up from deep inside Harry’s chest. Desire mixed with something else, something unquantifiable. It’s the thing that makes them want this, need this. Nothing else will satisfy them or quench their thirst.

OR the one where Harry likes the thrill of the chase, Louis likes to be chased, and everyone gets what they need… in the end.

Porn Without Plot / Light BDSM / Top Harry / Bottom Louis

push you out, pull you back in by @behisoneandonly

Harry grips his head in his hands helplessly, yanking the base of his dark curls and squeezing his eyes shut.

“Fucking hell,” he whispers, knuckles turning white from how hard he’s gripping the strands of his hair.

“Hey, hey,” says the petite stranger in front of him, quickly standing up. “Stop, you’re hurting yourself.”

–

Or Harry hates feeling vulnerable. Louis is set on breaking through his tough facade.

College/University AU / medical student Harry / Fashion student Louis / Strangers to Lovers / Pining / fluff / slight angst / Hut-Comfort / Anger Management

might we be stardust stories by ryanreynolds

"It was easier being at war."

In which werewolves and vampires have been fighting each other for a century, and Harry and Louis' marriage is what's gonna bring peace to the realm. Hopefully.

Werewolves / Vampires / Arranged Marriage / Slow Burn / Falling in Love / Pining / Fantasy

Like Candy In My Veins by littlelouishiccups

“Um…” Harry said slowly after a moment. “Okay. That’s… this is… Let me get this straight.” He lifted up a hand and swallowed. “You told your family that you have a boyfriend… and my name was the first one you thought of?” “Harry Potter was on TV, alright? It wasn’t that much of a stretch.” Louis pinched the bridge of his nose. He couldn’t believe he was explaining himself to Harry fucking Styles. He couldn’t believe he was stooping this low. “Forget it. I’m sorry I even thought about bringing you into this.”

Harry snorted. “What? Did you want me to pretend to be your boyfriend or something?”

(Basically the A/B/O, enemies to lovers, fake relationship, Christmas AU that nobody asked for.)

ABO / Fake-Pretend Relationship

until this blood runs cold by @soldouthaz

In a town as small as Louis’, everybody knows everybody and gossip spreads faster than the wildfires that rage on just outside their backdoors in the sweltering heat of summer. When something happens here everyone knows about it within seconds. Neighbors call neighbors and notes are left on doorsteps, old telephone lines ringing until there isn’t a single person who is left in the unknown.

So it’s definitely hot gossip when a vampire moves in across the street from him, the very same one who’s just become Louis’ boss.

Vampire Harry / Frottage / Blood Drinking

call you mine by @falsegoodnight

“I have a request.”

That’s what Louis Tomlinson says to Harry when he opens the front door a bit too aggressively. The latter feels justified after a round of annoyingly incessant knocking that was much too loud in the drowsy sludge of early Saturday morning.

“Zayn’s asleep,” is Harry’s tired, hoarse reply, irritation prickling at his skin. Less than a minute ago he was in bed, feeling perfectly content sprawled out on the mattress with the chilled air from the fan cool against his bare skin. And now he’s leaning up against the wooden door frame in nothing but his briefs because Zayn’s best mate decided that showing up unannounced at seven in the fucking morning was a brilliant idea.

“I’m not here for him,” says Louis curtly.

-

Or, Louis’ curious about how it feels to be bitten. Harry’s going to need more than just one bite.

Plot What Porn / Vampire Harry / Bottom Louis

your biggest fan by @soldouthaz​

Just like everyone else, Louis has a few habits that he can’t seem to break. Guilty pleasures, rather. His nails are perpetually short because he can’t quit biting them, the bottom of his shoes scuffed from tapping his foot constantly. Sometimes his leg gets a cramp from bouncing it so often underneath his desk. That isn't too bad, he reckons, just some average teenage coping mechanisms.

And also, occasionally, minor instances of theft.

Top Harry / Bottom Louis / Porn What Plot / Nerd Louis / Jock Harry

give me love by @falsegoodnight​ & @soldouthaz​

Despite being an omega, Louis’ always had a blatant dislike of alphas.

-

Or, Louis doesn't feel like a good omega, Harry doesn't remember how to be an alpha, and they figure it out together.

ABO / Alpha Harry / Omega Louis / Bottom Louis / Past Relationship Trauma / Slow Burn / Angst / Fluff

The Stars Look Very Different Today by @kingsofeverything​

For Harry Styles, child genius turned glorified spaceship mechanic, rescuing lost or broken down ships is a fairly common occurrence.

There’s nothing common about his latest mission, the ship, or that ship’s captain.

The last thing he expects to find in a distant galaxy is the one thing he’s been missing on Earth.

Space / Time-Travel / Science Fiction & Fantasy / Enemies to Lovers

The cat is out of the bag by 28sunflowers

Harry somehow gets himself stuck as a black cat on Halloween and needs help from Louis to change back into his human form.

The problem is: Louis doesn’t even know witches exist, much less that Harry is one. And there’s also the fact he thinks Harry is ghosting him after they had sex for the first time.

So the situations isn’t ideal. But it’s okay. Harry will figure something out.

Light angst / Witch Harry / Potions Accident / Fluff and Humour