#hongbin fake texts
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chronicfangirling · 5 years ago
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KDA In Excelsis: Ch21 (The King’s Avatar AU, CEO!Hakyeon, Gamer!Hongbin, VIXX x OCs ) Character Charts [x]
“Mom, you were so cool.” Yugyeom declared when Hana returned to the seats, standing up to hug her.
“Okay, okay, let her breathe,” Hongbin grumbled when Yugyeom showed no signs of letting go, pulling back the boy to take the seat at his left, so Hana could take the empty chair on the right.
“That was soooo cool,” Sooyeon gushed from the row behind, leaning forward to give Hana a bottle of strawberry milk.
“It really was, I’ll bet Taehyung didnt know what he had coming!” BamBam jabbed at the air, then handed Hana a box of strawberry Pepero from his snack stash.
“... You worked hard.” Hongbin opened a bag of honey butter chips and placed it on her lap, even as he kept his gaze straight ahead.
“Could you all pipe down, I’m trying to focus!” Mingyu whined, shaking his head.
“Aww, is our baby nervous for his match?” Hana teased. When Mingyu opened his mouth to retort, she stuffed a stack of crisps in his mouth. “I’m sure you’ll do fine.”
“You’re not supposed to win anyway, it’s bad form for a rookie to win against their sunbae,” Hongbin pointed out.
“Winning is the least of my worries,” Mingyu snarled.
“Why? I trained you. If it’s just Lee Taeyong, you have a chance to beat him if he gets careless.” Hongbin shrugged.
“--versus Lee Hongbin!” the emcee announced.
“Huh?” Hana blinked at Hongbin as everyone else exchanged looks. “Were you supposed to battle?”
Kihyun scooted over from the Tiny Herb seating and told her. “Umm... Jeon Jungkook challenged him.”
“Jungkook? Of Samsara? But Hyogi said the plan was for Jungkook to challenge him...” She gaped at Hongbin.
“I guess his super rookie went rogue,” Hongbin muttered.
“Your friend has balls.” Mingyu elbowed BamBam, nerves forgotten. But BamBam and Yugyeom were both looking at the Samsara seating in apprehension.
Sanghyuk’s narrowed eyes were gleaming cold. Jungkook had stood up before the captain, his head bowed. “Captain I... I just wanted to try--”
“You’re more curious about another team’s captain than your own?” Sanghyuk broke into a grin but the sharpness never left his gaze. “Just try not to lose too badly. That hyung doesn’t know how to hold back.”
“Hongbin....” Hana looked up at him, biting her lip.
His fingers flitted over her shoulder in the ghost of a pat. “It’ll be fine.”
The two players faced each other on the stage. When asked why he had challenged Hongbin, Jungkook responded: “Because... this may be my only chance... to battle the one called Gaming God.”
The emcee mock-gasped. “But your captain is the new MVP, and being called the new Legend in Glory, but you’d rather challenge his rival?”
Jungkook looked at loss for words, and Hongbin interjected: “Jungkook is privileged enough to have the MVP as his Captain, so it’s natural for him to take the opportunity to battle players he won’t otherwise have contact with.” The younger player inclined his head gratefully.
They both took their places and entered the volcano environment, their characters battling on the thin strip of rock across the lava. Jungkook’s Golden Persona immediately rushed Water Hyacinth, before the sharpshooter could take an advantageous position. Water Hyacinth blocked, remaining passively defensive even when Golden Persona missed a beat in the combo.
Golden Persona chained a Furious Dragon Strikes the Heart and Water Hyacinth neatly side-stepped. Going into cooldown, Golden Persona retreated, jumping to the rock pillar at the center of the pool of lava and creating a Magic Shield, but Water Hyacinth only stayed at the ready.
“Why aren’t you doing anything?” Jungkook demanded through gritted teeth.
Hongbin maintained his character’s defensive stance. “Because...”
“Because you don’t know how to hold back?” Jungkook cried. “Then don’t! Show your reckless hoobae what happens when they get in over their head!” Golden Persona shifts into the stance for Dragon Breaks the Ranks. “Please don’t make me that pathetic rookie you couldn’t even deign to make even 0.1% of an effort for!”
“Hongbin!” Hana clapped her hands over her mouth.
“He won’t have enough HP to take that!” Mingyu jumped to his feet, deaf to the complaints of the people behind him.
Water Hyacinth ran forward, as if to meet the attack, until he was almost at the foot of the pillar where Golden Persona perched. With a deft shot, he launched himself in the air just before Golden Persona fired a beam of light, hovering over it. Water Hyacinth poised to take a series of shots and Golden Persona readied to deflect, but the shots struck the pillar and shattered it, sending the latter to the lava.
“Crap!” Jungkook yelled.
Water Hyacinth shot a paralyzing shot at Golden Persona so he couldn’t move, then sniped him in the head for half his HP. Falling into the lava finished him off.
“That’s what I’m talking about!” Mingyu jumped in celebration.
“Lee Hongbin wins!” The emcee bellowed. “With his usual one-hit one-kill flair!”
“So awesome, Dad!” Yugyeom crowed, clapping like a happy seal. He stopped for a moment, shaking his head. “Sad for Jungkook but...” he clapped again. “But so awesome!!”
“Hey, wasn’t that a bit mean to the rookie?” Sooyeon questioned.
Hana nodded, sighing with both relief and exasperation. “A little... but Hongbin can only do either 0 or 100.”
Mingyu mimed firing a gun at Sooyeon. “Better 100 than a 0.”
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onepumpofsyrup · 6 years ago
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SHAWN MENDES
VIXX : N AND HONGBIN
Request:  Can you do one where N finds out that Hongbin has feelings for his gf and Hongbin tells N he doesn’t plan on “backing off/down”? Thanks so much if you do ❤️
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freakandgeekuniverse · 7 years ago
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Ravi has a whole new friend and why doesn't the group know about the stranger till they see him taking a nap with a manga on his face.And now he seems to be popping up everywhere Ravi is and now they have questions and someone better answer them!
Who told the world that they were allowed to gift this boy into his life. Ravi has a new friend and the soft-spoken boy seem to be keeping to himself with cameras shoved in his face every corner he turns. They have the name but was his relationship to Ravi? Childhood friend? Cousin? A Crazed Fan? HIS BOYFRIEND?! The group wants to know right now!
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chogiwakeupsheeple · 7 years ago
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konghannie · 7 years ago
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Hakyeon: Ok, Jaehwan, it's time we have The Talk.
Jaehwan: you know, we have sex education classes in school.
Hakyeon:
Hakyeon, mortified: I was talking about Santa Claus not being real but I guess you grew up fast.
Jaehwan: WAIT SANTA ISN'T REAL?
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archive-sugamoom · 7 years ago
Conversation
VIXX as things I said
N: ''He used to be so nice and caring.. Back then he didn't pine for literally every person he met.''
Leo: *Is sick and is kind of dying* ''I can finally start a relationship with death.''
Ken: ''I am going to head to bed and sleep. Gotta get that beauty sleep to maintain the prettiness of my face.''
Ravi: ''The sun is in my face and it is too much vitamin D.. Then again it is probably the only D I will get.''
Hongbin: ''I am more salty than all the salty seas combined.''
Hyuk: ''I'll have the social anxiety for breakfast.''
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k-pop-texts · 7 years ago
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❣Requested ❣ VIXX finding out male!reader has a crush on Leo Feel free to request anything - k ❤❤❤
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creatively-insane52 · 7 years ago
Conversation
Ravi:I know we're best friends but I'd fuck you if you asked.
Ken:What
Ravi:What
Hongbing, in the background eating chips:You said you'd fuck him if he asked.
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youhave1newmessage · 7 years ago
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Admin 🍓
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For every request made, an idol is born! So don’t be shy, feel free to leave one!
And also remember: we love that you love our work but help spread the word of our blog by reblogging! Our motivation is you guys! 😋 ❤️️
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seokmattchuus · 5 years ago
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Boundaries - Byungchan
A/n: Me taking forever to post this came in handy cause the gif I had before this one wasn’t smut worthy. P.S. The build up is better than the smut. I got carried away with the plot.
- Requested -
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“I still don’t get why you didn’t drop a solo after Produce like everyone else.” You stared at Byungchan from across the cafe table. “You were wrong to put out that cover and then just ghost until the comeback.” You pouted.
“I said you could come over if you didn’t bring this up again.” He sighed in fake disappointment. “Besides, if I went solo, I wouldn’t have time for you.” He smiled.
You let out a soft laugh at the response. You and Byungchan had been friends since high school. It was one of those ‘two quiet kids getting stuck in a project together because no one wanted them’ and after that, you two were pretty much inseparable.
When Byungchan decided to become a trainee, you were a little sad that you wouldn’t get to see him as often but you supported him the whole way. That support paying off when you finally saw him debut. Though it didn’t go the way everyone wanted, you were still proud to see him happy.
“Going solo would sti-”
You were cut off as the barista called out Byungchan’s name.
“Say solo one more time and you’re not getting your muffin.” He warned as he got up.
You laughed to yourself and watched as he made his way to retrieve your order.
“What time are you coming over later?” Byungchan asked as he placed your cup in front of you but held your muffin hostage.
“I don’t think I’m going.” You licked your lips nervously.
“Why?” He pouted. “You never miss ice cream night.” 
“Hongbin invited me over.” You trailed off, scared of how he’d react.
“You got back with him?”
You could hear the disappointment in his voice and you were disappointed in yourself too. Hongbin wasn’t necessarily the best person around, but he was the only one around, really. Besides Byungchan, no one’s ever shown much interest.
“It’s just easier.” You shrugged. “It’s hard being alone after being with him for so long.”
His tongue poked the inside of his cheek and he handed you your muffin.
“I’m not condoning this, but I’m not going to argue over it.” He said. 
“Thanks.” You gave a small smile. “And don’t tell the guys?” You asked. “Say I got sick.”
“You’re going to have to tell them eventually.” He sighed. 
“I know.” You frowned. “I just,” You paused. “I don’t want to ruin tonight by thinking about him, y’know?”
He reluctantly nodded, knowing you well enough to drop the topic before it escalated. 
“You owe me for lying.” He pointed at you. 
You nodded and gave him a smile. 
“Anything you want.”
-
After you left the cafe, you went home to fix yourself up before going over to Hongbin’s place.
Part of you felt guilty. You knew this was wrong. You knew you shouldn’t be giving him another chance. But you just weren’t the type to be able to be alone. You were probably the definition of being dependent.
Sure, everyone had talked to you about how it wasn’t worth it but that didn’t really sink in. You knew first hand how it wasn’t worth it, but did that stop you? No. 
Hongbin was routine for you and you weren’t ready for change. 
No matter how many times he hurt you.
By the time you made it to his apartment, you were starting to regret coming in the first place. Whether it was the guilt of ditching your friends or your conscious finally deciding to act, something just felt wrong. And of course it didn’t take long for that to prove true.
You were parked outside, trying to clear your head when you saw Hongbin’s car park a few spaces away from yours with someone in the passenger seat.
You knew you shouldn’t be watching as they got out. You knew you shouldn’t be hurt. You knew you should’ve just gone home. 
No. You knew you shouldn’t have come in the first place. 
But you couldn’t move. You couldn’t find it in you to actually move. You were used to this, so it shouldn’t hurt. You were used to this so you shouldn’t be surprised. 
You forced yourself to look away and pull out your phone, texting the only person who wouldn’t make you feel worse.
“Can you come over?” - 6:58 pm
-
It didn’t take long to get home and maybe it was because you couldn’t stop your foot from pressing harder onto the pedal as your thoughts ran free. 
Once home, you changed into more comfortable clothes. A hoodie and some spandex shorts. It wasn’t long after changing that you heard a knock on your door and you slowly opened it.
“We could talk about it or I can distract you.” Byungchan said softly as he walked in, holding up a bag full of Soju bottles. “What would you prefer.”
“You know the answer.” You gave a small smile. “But can we just sit for a while?” You asked as you closed the door and turned to walk towards your couch, leaving against the arm rest as you pulled the hoodie over your knees.
Byungchan nodded and made his way to sit against the opposite armrest, placing the bag on your coffee table, a soft frown on his face. He never liked to see you like this. 
A million things ran through your mind. Should you even tell him? Would anything even come from it? But it’s not like you could keep it in forever.
“He was with someone.” You chuckled softly. “I went over because we never talked about a time and he came back with someone in his car.” You paused. “I’m an idiot, aren’t I?” You asked, not gaining enough courage to look over at him.
“You’re not.” He said. “He’s just a dick.” He paused. “A dick that made you miss ice cream night.” He tried to joke.
“I’d like to open the bottles now.” You let out a small laugh, getting up to get two shot glasses.
“No drinking games?” He raised a brow as he moved to sit on the floor, taking one of the bottles out.
“Not one you’d be down for.” You gave a smirk, your shitty feeling fading. “‘Sexy Truth or Dare’. Drink one shot if you don’t want to answer the truth, two if you don’t want to do the dare.”
“I’m game.” He smirked. “You’d be surprised that I’m not as innocent as I look.” He chuckled.
“I could say the same.” You smiled, placing the glasses down and walking into your room to retrieve the box of cards before going back and sitting across from Byungchan. 
“Pick one.” You smiled, spreading out some cards on the table. 
He chuckled but complied.
“Truth.” You smiled, opening one of the bottles and pouring it into the glasses. 
“What song do you most want to have sex to?” He read off the card before glancing up at you.
“Chateau by Blackbear.” You said. “Not a most want, but definitely up on the list.” You said as you reached for a card.
“Dare.” He said.
“Lick your lips in the sexiest way possible.” You held back a laugh, already knowing he wouldn’t be able to do it.
To your surprise he didn’t back down. He ran a hand through his hair before putting on his best sexy glance and letting his tongue glide across the lip, the action a little more attractive than you thought it would be.
“I’m hot, I know.” He winked at you, earning an eye roll.
“Hurry up and pick a card.”
-
Multiple cards, and shots, later, the two of you were definitely past the point of no return. You’d completely forgotten about what happened earlier and the alcohol was definitely making the game more interesting. Something about seeing this side of Byungchan was getting to you more than you’d like to admit.
“Truth.” He mumbled out.
You let out a small giggle as you read the card.
“On a scale of one to ten, rate your bedroom skills.”
You glanced expectantly at him, watching as he shook his head and reached for his glass.
“No, I wanna know this one~” You whined, putting your hand over his glass.
He let out a whine himself.
“Fine.” He paused. “I’d give it a solid eight.” He shrugged.
“Why?” You cocked a brow.
“Girls seem to love it.”
“B-”
“Next card.” He cut you off, trying to move past the question.
“Truth.” You gave a pout but let him read the card nonetheless.
“Which PDA gets you worked up: Deep kisses or butt grabs?”
“Deep kisses. Definitely.” You bit your lip at the thought before picking up a card.
“Truth.” He said, swirling the shot glass.
“Would you rather tie me up or lick chocolate sauce off me?” You raised a brow.
“Why not both?”
His response was pretty quick and it caught you off guard. The thought of it lingering in your mind as you watched him pick up another card.
“Pretend my finger is an ice cream cone.” He laughed at the card before pointing his finger at you.
His laugh was cut off the second your lips wrapped around his finger. You glanced up at him the moment your tongue worked around the tip of his finger and you couldn’t help but watch as his Adam’s apple bopped.
“That’s enough.” He cleared his throat before taking his finger back and shoving a card in your direction. “Dare.”
“In one long lick, make your way from my ankle to my,” You paused your eyes looking away from him. “Inner thigh.”
As if the tension wasn’t already thick.
“You don’t ha-”
“Sit back.” He said seriously, the tone making your stomach turn as he moved from the coffee table.
You slowly leaned back, supporting yourself on your palms as you watch him make his way between your legs. 
You held your breath as you watched his head dip down and your breath hitched as his tongue finally made contact with your skin. As he made his way higher, your eyes closed and your head tilted back as you fought the small whine that wanted to come out.
But thankfully, or not so much, he pulled away before you could get too lost into it.
He sat back up and watched you expectantly.
“You good?”
You let out a shaky breath as you swallowed the words that threatened to spill.
“Just pick a card.” You mumbled, shoving the stack towards him. “Dare.”
“Sit on my lap for the next three cards.” He licked his lips as he finished reading, looking over at you only to see that you were already moving over to him.
Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was how turned on you were, but something about this entire situation had you jumping at every chance you could.
You moved yourself onto his lap and reached behind you for a card but he moved his own to reach for the cards and put them to his side to make it easier for you.
Your breathing stopped as you read the card you picked up, your eyes staying focused on the card as you tried to keep your voice steady.
“Give me a hickey where no one can see.”
Your mind was too busy thinking of all the possible spots to notice how the look Byungchan eyes shifted, his legs moving as he readjusted himself.
“Try not to make a sound.” He pressed his lips together as he moved your hair to one side of your neck.
“How are you so sur-” Your breath hitched as his lips made contact with your neck, the hand that held your hair now moving down to your hip, his fingers playing with the hem of your hoodie.
“Can I take this off?” He whispered against your skin. You nodded and he pulled away only long enough to pull the fabric over your head, the sudden cold air making you shudder.
His lips found their way back to your neck before going down your shoulder and collar bones, stopping above your bra cup. He glanced up at you and you gave him a small nod. Not a moment later, you felt the piece of clothing being pulled down.
You didn’t have time to react to the cold as the warmth of his mouth was placed right above your nipple, the sudden contrast pulling a small gasp from you.
“I said not to make a noise.” He whispered against your skin.
“How can I not when you’re being a tease?” You whispered, growing frustrated at how he wasn’t as affected as you. 
“Do you want me to stop being a tease?” He looked up at you before nipping at the skin again, your hips rolling against his at the feeling.
“Byungchan, if you don’t finish what you started, I might just fight you.” You rushed out as his lips ghosted past your nipple.
“Someone’s frustrated.” He let out a small chuckle as he pulled away to pull his shirt over his head, throwing it to the side. You took the chance to reach behind you and fully undo your bra, tossing it behind you.
You didn’t wait for him before you started working on the button of his jeans, too tired of waiting.
It wasn’t how either of you wanted this to happen. You never thought it would, but if it ever did, you always thought he leaned more on the softer side. Neither of you thought it would happen because you were drunk and heartbroken. 
Not like it mattered. There was always another time.
It was more than ungraceful how you both rid yourself of your clothing but none of it mattered the second you sank onto him.
“Shit,” He hissed as slowly bottomed out, his head falling back against the couch while your head fell onto his shoulder as he bucked his hips so he was fully inside of you, giving a few deep thrusts.
“You said you couldn’t wait, right?” He smirked, his hands settling on your hips so he could build up a somewhat steady pace, the alcohol in his system making it slightly sloppy but you were too lost in the feeling to care.
“Fuck, I can’t believe we’ve never done this before.” He cursed. “All because of that asshole.” 
His fingers now gripping your hips as his pace sped up, seemingly letting out his anger on you.
“Fuck, I can’t-” You whined out, your hands gripping onto his shoulders as you tried to contain yourself with the newly set pace. 
“What? Can’t handle it?” He teased. “Was he too soft with you?”
The words made your stomach tighten, the smirk in his voice only making you whine. 
“I guess he was missing out, then.” He scoffed before slowing down, using his hold on your hips to grind you against him. 
He didn’t say anything else as one of his hands traveled between the two of you to rub circles over your clit, the added pleasure making your legs shake lightly.
“Look at me.” He panted out. 
You slowly pushed yourself off his shoulder and leaned back, the sight of his bangs sticking lightly to his forehead making you clench around him.
“Look at me when you cum.” He said. “Can you do that for me?”
You nodded and kept eye contact. The intensity on his gaze urging your orgasm and you weren’t sure how much longer you’d last.
“Byu-” You whispered but he shushed you, telling you to just let go. 
Your eyes wanted to close with the way your orgasm washed over you but you tried to fight it, your eyes fluttering in the process. It wasn’t long before he followed suit, his hands stopping and holding onto your hips as his eyes shut.
It grew quiet as you both tried to catch your breath. His arms moved to wrap around your form, lightly holding you against him, your head resting on his shoulder once again.
“I can see why they said eight.” You smirked, not bothering to look up at him as he laughed lightly.
“That wasn’t even my best.”
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honeyedhoseok · 5 years ago
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Hanami Pt. 2 | The V2 Series
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Genre | angst, Taehyung x reader, friends->lovers->friends? au
Word Count | 6.3K
Summary | The gang takes the cherry blossom celebration back to Yeonwoo’s apartment. Amongst a myriad of alcoholic drinks, you and Taehyung get some time to talk things out, but it doesn’t go exactly as you’d planned. 
Warnings | Language. Heavy alcohol consumption. Jungkook making a joke about his big, fat, johnson. (probably) Incorrect readings of Zodiac signs. 
A/N | After a vvvvvv long hiatus, here’s part 2!!! Please anticipate part 3 and let me know what you think!!! 
Read the rest of the V2 Series HERE!
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Other than a few small hiccups along the way, you’d chalked the day with your friends up as a good one. Everyone seemed in high spirits around the table when you finally made your way back over to the shared bench. You picked over the remaining pieces of food left over after sitting down beside Hongbin.
“Everyone better be on my level tonight,” Hyejin declares as you stuff a cold French fry in your mouth, the statement obviously leading from the conversation that had been carrying on before you sat down. “Seriously,” she insists. “Yeonwoo never throws parties, so this one has to be really good.”
Yeonwoo shakes her head immediately. “You are not bartending, Hye.”
 “Come on!” Hyejin whines, throwing her friend a telling smile. “I’ll make it worth everyone’s while.”
“Last time I trusted you with my drinks I threw up in your guest bathroom before nine pm,” Jungkook says, frowning at the memory. “Hey, how did I get home that night?”
“Taehyung,” you say without a second thought, adding, “Even though he was drinking, too.”
Your heart stutters a little, as always, at the smallest mention of his name—although this time it was from your own mouth—but the conversation doesn’t linger on the topic long enough for you to get uncomfortable. 
“Well, we’ll make tonight a round two, if you’d like,” Hyejin purrs to Jungkook across the table, throwing him a playful wink. 
Jungkook shakes his head immediately. “Absolutely not,” he says. “And Taehyung is more responsible now—we Uber.”
Hyejin huffs, but lets the topic go, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “Speaking of, we need to go get more alcohol from the store, Yeonwoo. When do you want to do that?”
“I guess we could do it any time,” she says, shrugging. “Does anyone have any requests?”
“Just make sure there are good mixers,” Jungkook says in a murmur to Yeonwoo, leaning on her a little as he talks. She grins and leans into him as well, humming in agreement. 
They’re cute together—annoyingly so. But you have to admit, there’s something warm in your chest each time the two lock eyes, share a secret smile, or a knowing glance. It’s something that happens when there’s effortless chemistry between two people; although, it’s hard to watch when you don’t really have it yourself. Anymore, at least. 
As if on cue, Hongbin nudges your knee with his, raising his eyebrows to you in question. You know what this means: he’s had enough socializing for a moment and is wondering if the two of you can sneak away without too much time spent on goodbyes. 
You sigh, and when you turn back to the conversation at hand, Yeonwoo is looking straight at you. 
“You’re still coming, right, Y/N?” she asks cautiously, studying your suddenly annoyed expression. “Hongbin?”
“I don’t think I’m going to make it,” Hongbin says casually, scratching the back of his neck. “I’m kind of worn out from work lately—I really want to just take these next two days and recover.” 
His excuse comes as news to you, too, and your gaze snaps to his immediately. “What?” you ask, somewhat incredulously. “You’re not going tonight?”
Yeonwoo shakes her head, thinking that your shock is because you’re trying to save her feelings. “That’s okay, Hongbin. Don’t worry about it, really—”
“I thought we talked about this?” Hongbin says lightly to you. “Remember, earlier?”
You two hadn’t talked about it. You two hadn’t talked about it whatsoever—Hongbin had just decided by himself that he was going to stay home from the party at Yeonwoo’s. It was selfish of him, really—tonight of all nights you were going to need him to lean on, considering you didn’t know everyone that had been invited to party with your friends. 
“Thanks for being understanding, Yeonwoo,” Hongbin says, giving her a small smile. “Don’t tear the house down without me, okay?”
“We’re going to have so much fun!” Hyejin says, almost in reassurance to Yeonwoo, who is looking at you like you just flaked on her, too. 
“Yeah,” you say in agreement, giving her a smile. “It’s going to be a fucking blast, because we’re going to make it one!”
Your faked excitement seems to lift Yeonwoo’s spirits, and she straightens up in her seat. “Y/N, will you come with us to the store to get supplies?” she asks. “Hongbin can just drive your car home, and you can leave from here with me and Hyejin for the night.”
“I’ll come and pick you up when you’re ready to leave,” Hongbin offers, placing a soft hand on top of yours on the table. It’s a nice offer and an apology all in one—one that you are willing to take, for now. 
You nod. “Of course.”
You decide that you’ll talk with Hongbin about his decision to leave you high and dry later—for now, you had one thing, one person on your mind, and as if on cue, his name gets mentioned again.
“Hey, are you still coming with Taehyung later?” Yeonwoo asks Jungkook quietly as he pulls himself up to full height from the table. “Do you have any idea what time you’ll get there?”
Jungkook stands behind her, putting his hands on both of her cheeks and tilting her head back so that he can plant a gentle kiss on her forehead. The cute gesture makes the table collectively “Awww,” and Yeonwoo’s cheeks go pink from the teasing. 
“I’ll be there whenever you want me to,” Jungkook murmurs. “Let me know if I can help set up or anything. I’ll just drag Taehyung over early.”
Yeonwoo nods and Jungkook bids his goodbyes to you, Hongbin and Hyejin before walking off the way you all had come. 
“So, Hongbin, not to dismiss you or anything,” Hyejin begins, turning her telling gaze on him. “But—”
“Hey, I know when I’m not wanted,” Hongbin responds, laughing as he holds his hands up in surrender. “Y/N, you just text me when you’re ready to be picked up tonight, okay? You girls have fun.”
He gives you a quick kiss on the lips and gathers all the trash left on the table before leaving. 
Hyejin sighs dramatically, picking at a stray piece of string hanging from her shirt. “If both of you are going to be in relationships now, I have got to find me a man,” she says as you and Yeonwoo roll your eyes in unison. “Does Hongbin have any other rich, lawyer friends?”
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The three of you leave downtown after a few more walks around the block—you graze over the many booths of street sellers and eat some more fattening snacks and drinks before piling into Hyejin’s car to run some final errands before the party. 
Yeonwoo picks up a few decorative items (streamers, a backdrop for fun photos, and a gigantic punch bowl) from the store, before Hyejin drives you all to the grocery store, liquor store, and then finally, to Yeonwoo’s apartment to start setting up. 
By the time you get there, you are thoroughly worn out—being with the two of them for an extended period of time tended to do that, and you hadn’t done it in a couple of months, so it felt extra tiresome—but you are determined to hang in there and see the party through. 
The sun has set long after you all get to Yeonwoo’s apartment, and the cool night breeze feels good coming through the open doors of her balcony. Hyejin stands on Yeonwoo’s kitchen table barefoot, her eyes narrowed in determination to get a strand of party lights completely centered. 
You work on pouring liquid into small, clear cups and putting lids on them for jello shots, while Yeonwoo runs around making sure everything is clean and tidy one last time—even though her apartment was spotless when you’d all arrived an hour ago. 
“Should I start making drinks? Shots, maybe? To get us started?” Hyejin calls across the room to you. “What do you think?”
“About shots?” you question. “I’m always down.”
“Spoken like a true fire sign,” Hyejin says, giving you a wink. “My forever partner in crime, Y/N!”
“Fire sign?” Yeonwoo says, following you two into the kitchen and watching as Hyejin rummages through the cabinets for shot glasses. “It’s the far left one.”
“Like your sun sign,” you say, raising an eyebrow at Yeonwoo’s blank expression. “Oh come on, it's built into every girl’s DNA to know these things!”
Hyejin grabs vodka from the refrigerator and lines up the three shot glasses in a row. “I’m a Leo, Y/N is an Aries—so that means real fiery personalities, a little sure of themselves, good at getting what, or who, they want.”
“And me?” Yeonwoo asks, grabbing her shot glass and bringing it to her nose for a sniff that has her cringing. “I think I’m like a crab, or something?”
“Cancer,” you correct, chuckling. “You’re emotional and a little sensitive, but good at reading a room—”
“—which might make you the perfect host for this banging party we’re about to have,” Hyejin says with a grin. “When things go south tonight, we’re going to need your intuition.”
Yeonwoo shrugs, satisfied with that answer. Hyejin hands you your shot, and the three of you hold them together for a toast. 
“To Yeonwoo being the water to our fire,” Hyejin says first.
“To never living up to my true Aries potential until tonight,” you say, puckering your lips into a kiss.
“To reading the room!” Yeonwoo says lastly, making you all laugh before the warm vodka makes a fire in your chest as you swallow it as quickly as you can, trying not to taste anything.
“Awful,” you murmur, smacking your lips together in distaste. “That was fucking awful.”
“Well, there’s more where that came from,” Hyejin says. “Come on, let’s finish everything up before people start arriving.”
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Two hours and four shots later, you are in a dance circle in the middle of the living room, your hands thrown around Hyejin’s neck as the two of you grind to a song blaring through the surround sound speakers. 
You’re in a good place—your head is blurry from the alcohol but not too much, just to where you are a smiling, laughing mess at everything around you. You’re not thinking about how Hongbin left you to attend this party alone—although the thought does anger you a little bit if you linger on it. You’re not thinking about the rut you’ve been in for two months, or the fact that deep in your chest still sits a hard stone you’re not sure how to break. You’re not thinking about anything other than the fact that the outfit you stole from Yeonwoo’s closet fits you so good that you’re mad at yourself for not buying it first. 
Hyejin leans in to tell you something and her breath reeks of vodka and cranberry juice so you close your eyes, but listen to what she’s saying: something about another shot, you think. You nod vigorously, letting her grab your hand and pull you through the mess of bodies on the makeshift dance floor in the living room. 
“Where’s Yeonwoo?” Hyjein says, grabbing two clean plastic shot glasses from a bag lying on the counter. “She’s gotta keep up with us or the vibe will be off!”
You scour the party with hazy eyes until you spot Yeonwoo by the front door, slowly leading a group of new arrivals through the throng and into the kitchen. You cup your hands around your mouth to call her name, waving her over with eager hands. 
She sees you and nods, bringing the crowd along behind her. As she gets closer you notice Jungkook trailing the back, paper bags full of liquor bottles juggled in his hands. Your stomach jumps in anticipation—if Jungkook was here, that meant Taehyung was somewhere close by, and more importantly, Yeseul. You swallow what feels like a knot in your throat and search promptly for another shot of liquid courage to down your fears with. 
“Party’s here!” Jungkook yells, setting down on his bottles on the counter with numerous clinks. “Y/N, put whatever's in that glass down and take a shot of this.” He pulls out a bottle of his and Taehyung’s favorite—Aviation Gin—with a devilish grin on his face. 
“Aw, fuck,” you exclaim, already thinking of the burn. “I hate it!”
“Fuck yeah!” Hyejin says. Much to your dismay, she and Jungkook high-five over their obvious hatred for a smooth drink and the well-being of their throats. 
You’re all yelling about various things—the music is way too loud but no one is going to dare turn it down—but that doesn’t stop you from zoning in on the one voice you’ve been dying to hear for weeks as he breaks into the circle of people. 
Taehyung looks stunning as always, the faded remains of the pink in his hair giving him a fairy-like quality as he joins your circle of friends. In just a grey hoodie, jeans and sneakers, he still looks better than anyone else in the room. You also notice immediately that he looks incredibly sober, which you’re surprised at, but then you see the car keys dangling from his hand—signaling he was DD-ing for the night. 
It wasn’t like Taehyung to miss out on an opportunity to drink, and so you wonder if Yeseul is somewhere close—that Taehyung gave up a night of partying so that she could have fun, and then he could get her safely back to her place. Or his. The thought makes your chest feel heavy. 
“I’m taking one shot,” Taehyung says, looking at Jungkook with hard eyes. “Maybe two. No more.”
Jungkook shrugs, satisfied. “Everybody who is drinking needs to gather around!”
You all huddle around the small island in Yeonwoo’s kitchen, empty plastic shot glasses in hand. Jungkook hands out rations, laughing as the little bit of sobriety he was clinging to disappears with the atmosphere of the party, spilling quite a bit of alcohol on the counter in the process. 
“I had a few before coming over,” he tells Yeonwoo sheepishly. She just grins at him like he holds the sun, cheeks flushed from her own drinking. 
You’re trying hard to avoid Taehyung’s eyes—you’re not sure what you’re supposed to do, how you’re supposed to act, what you’re supposed to say to him yet. But he doesn’t back down from you at all. You can feel him looking across the island, eyeing you in such a way that you know he’s figuring out how drunk you are. He did it to every party he arrived at after you—sought you out to figure out what level you were at, and therefore what level he needed to get to. 
But tonight feels different. The static air between you two is simmered down, and while you still feel an uncontrollable longing to reach out to Taehyung, it feels as though the thoughts are not returned. There’s still no sign of Yeseul anywhere, and you can’t help but get a little giddy at the thought of the odds working in your favor that she didn’t want to come. 
“Toast, tap, drink,” Jungkook instructs. “And don’t hold this shit in your mouth or you’ll vomit for sure. It’s strong.”
You hold your breath as you follow in suit—Hyejin, Yeonwoo, Jungkook, Taehyung and you all taking a shot together like old times makes you feel elated. Maybe tonight wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe you could get through this. 
And maybe Jungkook wasn’t lying about the gin tasting fucking awful—you choke it down and immediately reach for a 2-liter of soda sitting on the counter to chase with. He, Taehyung and Hyejin take it with ease, and Yeonwoo only gets down half of hers. 
Jungkook smacks his lips in thought. “I need a cigarette now.”
You follow the rest of the gang outside onto Yeonwoo’s patio. You fumble with the sliding glass doors, your semi-drunk brain unable to remember how to shut it properly and Jungkook comes to your rescue. 
“It gets stuck here all the fucking time,” he murmurs around the cigarette stuck in the corner of his mouth. “I keep telling her—to let me fix it—but supposedly—” he finally gets it shut with a hard pull that you were not capable of exerting at this point in the night, “that would be a waste of my time.”
“But fighting with a door isn’t?” you question. 
“I just don’t want you to do anything else around here!” Yeonwoo says, laughing. “I’m not dating you so you can fix all the broken shit in my apartment.”
Jungkook grins. “Oh, that’s right, you’re dating me because of my fat, enormously long schlon—”
“Ahhhhh!” Yeonwoo screams, stumbling over a chair on the patio to come over and slap Jungkook on the chest with an open palm. You cover your ears childishly and Hyejin frowns at Jungkook’s interrupted brag. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Taehyung break out into a grin at all of your antics, and it pushes you over the edge with courage to say something to him. 
 “Why’d you drive tonight?” you blurt out. 
Taehyung locks eyes with you for the first time in months and you feel weightless. His tongue sneaks out to wet his lips before he replies quietly, “I wasn’t trying to stay out too late. I have work tomorrow.”
“Oh,” you say, grasping at straws. You didn’t expect his answer to be so cut and dry. “And Yeseul?”
“What about her?” 
“Oh, um—why, like, why didn’t she come?”
You can hear the ignorance in your voice in an instant, and Taehyung’s right eyebrow hitches slightly higher at your first ever mention of her. He obviously knew that you knew about her, but he seems surprised that you’re bold enough to ask outright. 
“She has plans with her own friends tonight,” he says, finally. 
You feel like you deflate at the confirmation that no, Yeseul was not there, and no, she was not going to ruin any chances you had at talking to Taehyung. It dawns on you suddenly that that’s why you were so uptight tonight—somehow in the back of your mind, you’d been planning on pulling Taehyung to the side to try and sort some of the jumbled mess in your head out, though you weren’t quite willing to admit it to yourself yet. 
Hope was a dangerous thing—you knew that a little too well. But you couldn’t help but be hopeful that the opportunity would present itself, and that Taeyhyung wouldn’t be quick to shoot you down when you were ready to talk about it all. 
“Jungkook, what’s your sign?” you hear Hyejin drunkenly slur, bringing your attention away from Taehyung for a split second. “Wait, don’t tell me, let me guess.”
She sizes him up with glossy eyes, pursing her lips. 
“You’re too relaxed and introverted to be a fire sign,” she says. “And you’re not that secretive, so that rules out water signs—”
“I was born in—”
“Don’t tell me!” she screeches, holding up a hand. “Are you a—Virgo?”
Jungkook nods, somewhat impressed. “How’d you know?”
“Virgo the virgin!” she replies, giggling drunkenly. “I just knew!”
Jungkook rolls his eyes, taking the jab in stride. He gives Yeonwoo a playful wink—probably nodding to the thought of being a virgin, but keeping it between the two of them—before holding up a small, silver flask he conjures from the back pocket of his jeans. “Anyone want some moonshine?”
“Just how fucked are you trying to get tonight, Jungkook?” you question, but reach for the flask nonetheless. “God, it smells like rubbing alcohol.”
“Yeah, sanitize your hands while you’re at it,” he replies with quick wit, grinning. “And I thought we were all revving up to go downtown at some point—or was I wrong?”
“Downtown?” Hyejin says, head whipping around to Yeonwoo. “You want to go dancing?” 
Yeonwoo shrugs. “The nights young, my friends,” she replies. “Let’s just see what happens.”
You take the smallest, dantiest sip of the god awful potion in Jungkook’s flask, but the taste still manages to catch in the back of your throat and choke you. Tears spring to your eyes as you try to swallow quickly in succession, searching around for something to chase with. 
Taehyung comes to your rescue, handing you a cup you didn’t realize he was holding. “It’s soda,” he says, reading the question on your face. “Maybe you should slow down.”
Whereas a comment like that would usually sound like he was worried about your well-being, this time it falls flat—a mere suggestion from an outsider observing your sloppy behavior. It falls from his lips with a hint of condescension not unnoticed by you, even in your current inebriated state. 
“Taehyung’s birthday is at the end of December,” Jungkook says, bringing the conversation back. “What does that make him?”
“Capricorn,” you, Hyejin, and Taehyung reply in unison. 
“A mystery,” Hyejin muses, narrowing her eyes at Taehyung. “Capricorn men are literally an enigma, it’s annoying.”
Taehyung laughs. “I’m sorry?”
“Unpredictable, too,” you add on. “Really sweet and sensitive once you break through that outer shell, though.”
Taehyung meets your eyes across the patio briefly, something flickering in them for a millisecond that has your heart kickstarting. The look goes unnoticed by your friends of course, but then again, so had a lot of things between you and Taehyung. 
“Unpredictable, huh?” Jungkook repeats, rubbing his chin. “I guess that’s true. I saw this guy on a Friday looking normal, and on Saturday he’d dyed his hair that ugly ass pink color it is now.”
You all chuckle, and Taehyung flicks his fringe out of his eyes defensively, running a hand through the rose-colored stands. “Hey, Yeseul did a good job on this!”
“Yeseul knows very well how I feel about it despite the evenness of color, as she likes to put it,” Jungkook retorts, crossing his arms. “You look like a pansy.”
“Oh, fuck off.” Taehyung rolls his eyes at the comment, clearly not offended in the least. “That's why you asked her about dying yours next?”
“I did not!”
“Aw, Jungkookie,” Yeonwoo coos, pulling him into an embrace so that she can run her fingers through his hair. “What color?”
Jungkook softens immediately, speaking lower in the most dignified fashion he can to defend himself. It’s comical to the rest of you how pitiful he sounds muttering to Yeonwoo like you all just crushed his hopes and dreams of having colored hair. “I don't know, I was thinking maybe, maybe purple? Something dark, not bright like Taehyung’s fucking ugly mug.”
“Should we go back inside?” Hyejin says, but she’s already making her way back toward the sliding glass door. “I want to dance some more.”
It dawns on you the implications of Taehyung’s confession. If Yeseul had been the one to dye his hair pink—which was right before you’d come over to his apartment that last time—what did that mean for the timeline of their friendship? Their relationship? Was Taehyung seeing her before you two “broke up”? 
A strong wind gusts across the patio, but the cold feeling that makes goosebumps arise on your arms has nothing to do with the weather outside. You feel hollow suddenly, unaware of how Taehyung was pulling away from you before you’d even realized it. Why were you so bad at seeing these things about him? Were you so blinded by his absolute obsession with you over the years that you couldn’t fathom the thought of him having feelings for another person?
By the time the ringing in your ears stops, you realize your friends have left you alone on the patio to rejoin the party. You turn on your heel to follow them, wrapping your arms around yourself to shield from the cold only to be met with Taehyung’s hesitant gaze. His hand is on the handle to the door, as if he was thinking about going inside before he shut it behind everyone else to talk to you alone—but also as if at any moment, his stiff frame could change his mind and have an easy escape route. 
“Oh,” you breathe out, “you scared me.”
“Sorry,” he says, rather blandly. “I was just—I don’t know. I thought we could, or maybe that I should—because we haven’t really—”
The halted sentences make your heart hurt. He doesn’t want to talk about this for himself, but rather, for you. Taehyung is fine with the way things are, you realize suddenly. 
“Talked?” you finish for him. “Yeah, I’m aware.”
Taehyung presses his lips together in a line, breathing out through his nose. You want to get mad at him, want to yell at him about all of this, all of the hurt, the stress, the emotional duress he’s put you through these past couple of months—but you don’t think it would do any good at this point. So you decide to change tactics.
“You look great,” you say finally, giving him a timid smile. “How’s the library?”
“Good.” He doesn’t comment on your outer disposition, which you’re a little thankful for. “A little busier—I think the college kids are home for spring break.”
“Oh, it is about that time,” you hum. 
Taehyung keeps his distance from you, but he moves to where you are against the railing of Yeonwoo’s patio. He’s more than an arms distance away, but you’re grateful for the diminished space. 
“Taehyung, listen—”
“Y/N—”
You both start and stop, and there’s a rushing in your ears at the way Taehyung is suddenly looking at you. The thudding base from the stereo inside Yeonwoo’s place matches pace with your heart, and you realize this is it. This is your moment to talk to him about everything you’ve been feeling, and so you open your mouth to do so but Taehyung cuts you off. 
“Where’s Hongbin?” he asks lightly, but you can tell from the deepening corners of his mouth into a slight frown that he’s hoping you’ll tell him what he wants to hear. 
You sigh. “He didn’t want to come.”
“Why?” 
You think you detect a bit of hopefulness in his tone, but you can’t be sure. Was he hoping the same thing you were about he and Yeseul—that this time apart had given both of you the opportunity to decide who you truly wanted? 
“He’s exhausted from work.”
Taehyung snorts and rolls his eyes, and you try not to let it show how much it lifts you up. You feel the two of you sliding back into your old routine little by little, and you are lighter than you have been in weeks. 
“It’s amazing how he’s never exhausted when he wants to throw a party,” Taehyung mutters. 
You watch him pat his pockets for a smoke, and when he comes up empty-handed he sighs, like he’s remembering something. 
“What?” you say. “You forgot them?”
“Force of habit, I guess,” he says, throwing you a knowing look—as if you were the reason he smoked so much. The thought doesn’t bother you as much as it should. “I’m trying to quit.”
“Why?”
Taehyung’s eyes drop from yours. “Ye isn’t a fan,” he admits quietly.
The already-fragile glass heart sitting in your rib cage cracks a little. Taehyung cared enough about this girl to quit smoking? But your upset quickly turns to anger, your earlier decision to play nice with Taehyung evaporating like boiling water. 
“She must really be something,” you reply sourly. 
Taehyung’s eyebrows furrow, and you can tell by the way his eyes cloud over that you’ve hit a nerve. “She is,” he says evenly. “The best thing about her? She doesn’t have a shitty boyfriend that she won’t leave.”
You don’t know whether it’s the cold, the time in between shots, or the fact that you needed to concentrate on the conversation the two of you were having, but the buzz from your alcohol has settled into the background. You’re thankful for the clarity, especially since your conversation with Taehyung seems like it’s about to take a turn for the worst. 
“That’s not fair,” you say indignantly. “What am I supposed to say to that, Taehyung?”
“None of this is fair, Y/N,” he says, shaking his head. 
A grim smile makes its way across his face, and it pains you to see how distant he is from the conversation, even though he was the one to bring it up. He doesn’t seem to care about any of this anymore—not even you. The thought sends a wrecking ball barreling toward your tiny glass heart, but just as it’s about to hit, Taehyung mutters the words that change everything:
“You made me do this,” he says. “All you had to do was tell me you wanted me.”
You turn to face him, looking him straight in the eyes. “I do want you. I always have!”
“Just me?” he says, trying to keep his tone even. He’s taken a step closer to you, and it would only take a few more to close the distance between the two of you. His jaw is set hard, bracing himself for the impact of your answer, and you hate that he feels this way toward you now—like he always has to keep his guard up because he can’t predict your reactions. 
Your thoughts have you hesitating for a millisecond in your answer, and that's all the time it takes for Taehyung’s hard facade to wash back over. 
He laughs, rolling his eyes again. “That’s what I fucking thought,” he says. “You haven’t changed a bit—you just don’t know what to do now that you don’t have the best of both worlds. You’re an awful person, Y/N. Do you know that?”
Tears spring to your eyes, and you bite your lip in fear that a sob will rush it’s way from the back of your throat. No matter how strong your feelings were toward Taehyung, it was hard to come to terms with the thought that the last five years of your life had been a mistake. 
“No,” you say, unable to utter anything else as a rebuttal.
“Yes,” Taehyung replies. “You are. You hurt and manipulate the people around you until they’re useful—look at you now. I know that you didn’t speak to Yeonwoo weeks after we—” he pauses, skipping over the phrase broke up, “after it. But you brought her back why? Because she’s an emotional crutch. You had to fill the hole that you dug with someone else—”
“Shut up,” you say. “Shut the fuck up, Taehyung. She’s my friend.” 
“So was I,” he says coldly. “And look where that got me.”
“I—what do you want me to do to make this right?” you say in a pleading tone. “I just—I miss you, okay? This whole thing spun way out of control and then you were just—we were just—not talking. I didn't know what to do anymore.”
“Why can’t you ever admit fault, Y/N!” he says, tone rising an octave in volume. “You did this. It didn’t just happen to you, all right?”
“Fine!” you say, and the first tear makes its way from your welling water line onto your cheek. “I did this! I fucked up, I know!”
Both of you stand there for a moment, staring at each other with hard eyes. You know you look pathetic, somewhat drunk and crying, while Taehyung seems torn between coming to embrace you and turning on his heels and heading back inside to forget the whole conversation ever happened. 
“You’re a fucking jerk, Taehyung,” you say, wiping harshly at your damp cheeks. “You’re a jerk, but I like being with you, okay? I’m sorry. And I miss you. I miss us.”
You’re laying it all out on the table, being as vulnerable and open as you can to him after having months to take it all in and think about everything. 
Taehyung opens and closes his mouth a few times, trying to choose his next words carefully. You know that the next sentence that he says will either make or break the wrecking ball paused in front of your heart, and you brace yourself to the best of your abilities for it’s impact. 
“I miss you too, Y/N,” he murmurs quietly. “But we were never an us. You wouldn’t let it happen.”
You can hear the shatter tinkle in your eardrums. 
“Taehyung, please,” you say, lip trembling. “Don’t do this.”
At this point, your body physically hurts from the toll this conversation is taking on you. Nothing is going how you thought it would—although, you’re not sure exactly how you thought this conversation might go in the first place. Taehyung seems eons away from ever forgiving you completely, and even further, somehow, from wanting to try anything of the sort. 
“Can we be friends, at least?” you ask, grasping at straws. “You were my best friend, Taehyung. I’m—it’s not the same without you, and I know you feel the same.”
It’s a bold move for you. Taehyung doesn’t confirm or deny your statement, and he doesn’t have to, because the sliding glass door opens and saves him from saying anything. 
“What the hell are you guys still doing out here?” Jungkook yells, still standing inside Yeonwoo’s apartment. “Come on, we’re doing shots!”
“One second,” Taehyung says, giving his friend a sobering, knowing stare. The two look at each other for a second too long before Jungkook slides the door shut again. 
Your mouth falls open. “What was—does he know?”
Taehyung doesn’t answer you. “Let’s try to be friends.” He places extra emphasis on try and friends for your benefit. All of this seems for your benefit rather than his, but you’ll take it.
You nod slightly, squaring your shoulders. This was what you wanted, right? You decide not to press him any further before he changes his mind again. 
“Do I look like I’ve been crying?” you ask, wiping at a few stray tear streaks in your makeup. 
Taehyung gives you a small once-over. “Yeah,” he says. “But you always look like that, lately.”
He’s walking away from you and back to the party before you can say anything else to him. For the second time tonight, you’re left alone on the patio by yourself, lost in your own thoughts.
Despite everything you and Taehyung just got off your chests after months of not speaking, you still feel hollow inside—maybe even more than before. That hope that you were clinging so desperately to seems to have deflated like an old balloon, leaving behind a pathetic version of your pride that you wish you could shake. 
Your phone buzzes in your pocket, breaking you out of your reverie. You expect it to be a text from Hongbin, wondering how the party is going, but it’s not. Instead, a notification for an Instagram update from yeon_woooo pops up, and you click on the link. 
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Here you were, in the middle of what could be a really good night with all your friends, and you were spending most of your time out in the cold, worrying over someone who had just blown off your feelings as easily as picking a piece of lint from his sweater. Why couldn’t you get over this? Why couldn’t you leave Taehyung alone, or better yet, be satisfied with the thought that he wanted to be friends? Wasn’t that enough?
“Y/N!” Hyejin yells, much too loudly out of the sliding glass door, “Did you mess up the vibe? You look sober as fuck right now!”
You turn on your heel, pocketing your phone and giving her the best grin you can manage. “I was coming!” you say, sliding on your party facade. “I had to call Hongbin!”
“He’s not here so fuck him!” Hyejin replies, giggling. 
When you get close enough to her, she reaches out and grabs your wrist, tugging you over the ledge and back into the party. Warmth washes over your cold shoulders and arms, making goosebumps arise. You hadn’t realized how chilly it was outside until you were greeted by the almost-uncomfortably hot atmosphere inside the house. 
Around the island once again are all your friends, somewhat noticeably drunker—other than Taehyung. He stands beside Jungkook, casually sipping the same soda he held earlier. His eyes meet yours across the island and he gives you a ghost of a smile over the top of his cup. 
“After this, I say we take this shit downtown,” Jungkook says while doing his duties as bartender. Somehow he’d convinced everyone to take more gin shots, and your stomach burns just watching him pour them. “Taehyung, you’re DD-ing, what do you think?”
Taehyung shrugs. “I’m down, I can stay out for a little longer.”
Jungkook gives him a sloppy grin in return. Maybe you’d test your newfound friend theory with Taehyung while the night was still young—a little more liquid courage and the right atmosphere and you might be able to shake Taehyung out of his anger towards you. 
“Taehyung,” you hear yourself saying suddenly, calling to him across the island. “Are you taking this shot?”
He shakes his head. “Maybe later, downtown—I need to be okay to drive.”
You nod, feeling foolish for forgetting about his somewhat-sobriety pledge for the night. He watches you a little more intensely as you set up to take the shot with the rest of the group, in addition to some others that had gathered around with you all. 
In the midst of tipping your head back, squeezing your eyes closed at the awful taste, you don’t see Taehyung looking at you with the slightest bit of disgust on his face, a frown marring his features at your drunk antics that would normally be enticing to him. It’s a look mixed with a little bit of pity, a little bit of remorse, and a lot of nostalgia for what used to be between the two of you. 
But by the time you open your eyes, it’s gone, replaced by the coolness of the earth sign traits that he so abundantly inhibits. Almost as if it were never there in the first place.
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chronicfangirling · 5 years ago
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When you sneak out the morning after (Wonshik, Hongbin, Sanghyuk)
requested by: anon
Can i request how vixx would react to you sneaking out after you guys were intimate & they saw the next day 🌸
(So... these have been in my drafts for literally a year, and I don’t even have the original request ask anymore, oops.)
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onepumpofsyrup · 6 years ago
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SLOW BUILD
VIXX: HONGBIN
Request: Can I request a fic where you’re a college student and you’re also friends with hyuk predebut, and you bring food to their practices during your breaks, and hang out with them, and then get closer and closer as friends with everyone. Then maybe hongbin falls for the reader but he thinks she has a thing with hyukkie so he backs off, then angsttt, then they get together?
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squirrelly831 · 5 years ago
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Discovers He’s a Serial Killer and He Refuses to Let Her Leave [Wonshik and Sanghyuk]
A bit more on the darker side of things. It strays away from the idea of love and more to control and so I leave you with that as my warning. There’s violence and lots of it for some members. You’ve been warned.
I’m not playing… There’s violence. Not for the weak hearted. Kind of yandere I guess?
Enjoy~
Wonshik
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Hayun stumbled down the street as she tried to sober up before she returned home to Wonshik, her husband. He had always hated when she went out and drank a lot, but she had celebrated a promotion her best friend received. Hayun smiled at the thought of her loving husband. She knew he didn’t mean any harm about his worry of her drinking. He was just a worrywart about her safety. Especially with all the killings that had happened in the area. Hayun sent her husband a text to let him know she was on her way home. As she passed by a home, she heard a hair-rising scream from a woman that made her freeze. She looked at the home that was filled with darkness before she decided to go and check on the woman.
Hayun knocked on the front door only for it to eerily creaked as it opened slightly. She pressed her gloved hand to the door and pushed it open to look into the dark entrance, “Hello? Are you okay?” When she got no response, Hayun entered the home. She clutched her phone prepared to call the police if anything stuck out to her. She peeked into each room downstairs as a creak sounded above her. With a shaky breath, she made her way up the stairs and down the dark hall. She reached the last bedroom, “Hello?” She pushed it open and her eyes caught sight of someone sprawled on the ground. “Oh god! Are you okay?” She rushed to their side only to realize that the person was deceased. A pool of their own blood. “Oh my god” she dropped her phone in pure shock and disgust. She could tell that one of the eyes had been gouged out and she felt like she would throw up at the gruesome scene.
“Why are you here?” She screamed at the sudden deep angry voice. She fell back as she looked to see Wonshik above her and the body. He was covered with blood splatter and he held a knife secured around his heavy duty gloves. His eyes were filled with rage and his chest rose and fell as he took deep breaths, “You shouldn’t be here, Hayun” he growled. He took a step towards her and she crawled back in fear. “You weren’t supposed to be out–I tell you over AND OVER” his bloody glove went to his head as his anger grew. He pointed the knife at her, “YOU NEVER LISTEN! WHY CAN’T YOU JUST LISTEN?” He struck the floor beside her. Hayun let out a cry as he was at her eye level. Wonshik reached out to her, but she pulled to her feet and ran out of the home ignoring the scream of her name.
He didn’t know what to expect when he returned home after placing the body out to be found by someone else. What he didn’t expect was to come home to no one home. Wonshik had Hayun’s phone in his pocket, so calling her was a useless thought. He had brought home flowers to make up with what she had seen. “Hayun?” He called out in concern. He checked each room and his fear only grew as each was empty. “Where could she have gone?” A light bulb clicked as he rushed to their shared bedroom and he swung open their closet. “No…” A large amount of her clothes were gone.  “No… No…NO! FUCK!” He yanked out his own clothes breaking the bar at the process. “NO! NO!” Wonshik’s eyes dilated as he threw down the nightstand behind him. He threw the alarm clock against the wardrobe mirror shattering it as he tore apart the room.
Once he calmed down, he broke into sobs. You’re weak his inner voice spat so fucking weak. It laughed at how pathetic he acted. Bring her back. If she fights you kill her… or replace the bitch. Wonshik knew he could replace Hayun, but all he wanted was her.
Only her.
His anger consumed him. His love became his obsession. His sobs had ceased as he looked up. His eyes were dark. Almost lifeless. There was only one thought that etched into his mind, If I can’t have Hayun, nobody can. Wonshik was determined to bring her back by any means. He wouldn’t hesitate to kill her if she tried to fight him.
Sanghyuk
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Leslye only found out about Sanghyuk being a serial killer because he became a prime suspect of the serial killings that had happened. She didn’t believe it at first until all the days he was out at work late seemed to correlate with the murders. It explained why he had clothes missing or why there would be small specs of blood that were on his outfits. Or when he would burn his clothes in their fireplace that she never bothered to question. However, she never relayed the information to police. Leslye’s only thought was getting away from Sanghyuk. She didn’t know that he was taken off the list of suspects, but it wouldn’t have mattered. It all lined up too well to be some mere coincidence.
As she left, she decided to leave him with a letter that would later be her big mistake. She etched out her six word sentence in the paper and slipped off her wedding ring before she fled.
When Sanghyuk returned home, he had planned to make Leslye dinner as he beat her home from work. He whistled as he shrugged off his suit jacket and made his way to their bedroom. As he entered the room, he felt it feel spacious compared to usual, but didn’t think a thing of it. However, when he hung up his jacket, that was when he noticed the lack of clothes in their closet. Sanghyuk checked the dresser to see only his clothes before going to the bathroom to see his things inside. Did she have a business trip? No, she wouldn’t take that much– the shine of the wedding ring on her nightstand drew his attention. His eyes widened as he rushed to the nightstand and examined the ring. That’s when he saw the note.
I can’t stay with a killer.
Sanghyuk crumpled the paper in his hand as he looked about the room. She left him. She knew who he was and she left. Sanghyuk let out a laugh as he doubled over. His hand pressed against half his face as he let out a maniacal laugh, “She thinks she can leave me?” A short laugh left his lips. “Do our vows mean nothing to her?” He went to his nightstand and lifted the fake bottom and pulled out his butcher knife as his eyes darkened. “Till death do us part.”
It didn’t take Sanghyuk long to find where Leslye went. He had every intentions to bring her back home with him whether she wanted to or not. He hung outside her home behind bushes as he watched her enter her apartment. Sanghyuk couldn’t kidnap her in broad daylight as he knew he’d have to dispose of any and all witnesses which would allow Leslye to escape. So he waited until nightfall. He crawled through one of her windows with ease, “I always tell her to lock the windows.” He noticed her cell phone charging on the nightstand, so he unplugged it and pocketed it. Then Sanghyuk chuckled as he made his way to the sounds of the tv playing. Leslye sat in the dark with the light of the tv in front of her to brighten up the room. He smirked as he crept up behind her chair and wrapped his arm around her chest to keep her from jumping. Sanghyuk pressed the cold blade to her neck. Leslye tried to move, but Sanghyuk pressed her back tighter, “Relax, it’s only me, love” his breath blew over her ear.
A cold shiver went down her back as her blood ran cold, “Hy-hyuk, how–
“You’re easy to find, babe. Did you really think I wouldn’t find you?”
“How di-did you get in?”
He chuckled darkly, “You have a habit of leaving windows unlocked. I told you– you never know who could get in.” He pressed the knife harder making a small cut in her neck. His other hand let her go and turned her chin to force her to look at him, “Understand this love and understand it well. I will never let you walk away from me. The only way you’re leaving is” he grazed the blade against her throat, “if I slice your beautiful throat in two. And toss you into the Han River in a body bag.” He felt her shake under his grip and he smirked. He knew he made his threat clear, “Do you understand, love?” She nodded quickly and he tsked, “Verbal.” The knife pressed to her throat, “While I’m in a good mood.”
“I understand” she choked on her words as her tears swelled in her eyes.
Satisfied with her response, he put the knife down, “You know, that look really turns me on. Do you fear me?” He gave her a loving smile as he waited for a response. His lips fell as she didn’t reply. Sanghyuk growled as he reached out and pulled her head back by the hair, “When I ask you something I want a response!” She yelped in pain as she hurried out a yes. Sanghyuk let her go and chuckled, “See, it’s not hard. Now” his voice fell an octave as he moved from her, “get your shit and let’s go home.”
Leslye jumped from the chair and fled to her bedroom. She planned to get her phone, but noticed it wasn’t on the charger. She was trapped… She threw her things back into the suitcases she first had them in before she returned to the living room where Sanghyuk was reclined.
He had her phone in one hand and his blade in the other. Sanghyuk looked back at her and his face lit up, “Ready?”
“Yes…”
“Great! I’ll get the bags” he hopped off the sofa and took the two suitcases from her. He slipped his knife into one of them. “Kiss.” She hesitated before she leaned up and kissed him. Sanghyuk put one of the suitcases down and pulled her closer as he deepened the kiss. He bit her lip playfully, something he did often. When he pulled back, he headed to her front door. “Let’s get out of here!” He grinned as the two left the apartment and returned to their shared home. Sanghyuk wouldn’t let her out of his sight once they were home.
Hakyeon and Taekwoon || Jaehwan and Hongbin
Credit to gif owners
Written & revamped by Squirrelly831
♕ REQUEST
☮ VIXX MASTERLIST
∞ ULTIMATE MASTERLIST
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isitkpop · 5 years ago
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Hongbin Masterlist
Aesthetics/Moodboards:
Drabbles:
Fake Snaps/Texts:
Head canons:
Imagines:
Scenarios:
Classic Drunk Confession!
Spams:
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just-come-baek · 6 years ago
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Wedding Fever 3
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Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader
Themes: smut (rly soon) | a shitload of fluff | a pinch of angst | wedding!au | friends to lovers!au | fake dating!au | SLOWBURN
Word count: 7.7k
Summary: Baekhyun is the best man, and I am the maid of honor at our friends’ wedding. Although should we be excited about our friends getting married, we seem to complain a lot more every time we meet for another preparation. Maybe it’s a bit fanciful of me to think that, but I hope, somewhere between choosing flowers and venting about the reception prep, he’ll like me just as I like him.
A/N I thought abut this story and there should be 2 more parts. Sorry for not updating this sooner
previous part | masterlist | next part
The weekend arrived way too soon for my liking; I hadn’t had enough time to brace myself for meeting Baekhyun’s parents; however, knowing me, regardless of how many days I’d have to repeat the pep talk I was giving myself at least twice every four hours, it wouldn’t suffice. I was a nervous wreck, and if I was going to stress for another day, I’d definitely go bald.
With accordance to a text Baekhyun had sent me, he was going to pick me up within thirty minutes, leaving me too little time to get dressed, do my makeup and pack my suitcase. And despite the stress he had put me in; I carefully chose an elegant outfit consisting of sky-blue button down, a pair of high-waisted white jeans and a pair of shiny oxfords. As for makeup, I opted for a gentle touch; light brushes of blush and soft colors of eyeshadow perfectly matched my matte red lipstick.
Knock! Knock!
Upon hearing someone knock, I turned my head toward the doors, quickly dashing to open them. It must’ve been Baekhyun on the other side, and since I hadn’t seen him in a while, I smiled at the silly thought. Maybe it was lame of me, but I actually missed him. And though I would love to meet with him under different circumstances, I was not to complain.
The moment I swung the doors open, I saw him in his perfect form. His hair was neatly combed, a matching sky blue shirt around his broad shoulders and chest, light brown trousers loosely hugging his legs. He almost looked like a casual version of me, and it took a lot of self-restraint not to throw myself in his arms and kiss his breath away.
“What the hell are you wearing?” Baekhyun asked as he glanced at me from head to toe.
“What’s wrong with my outfit?” I questioned, looking down at myself, not sure which part of it Baekhyun didn’t like. It seemed classy, so what was his problem?
“Nothing’s wrong about it, you look great.” Baekhyun started, still eyeing me up and down. “But we’re going to a casual barbeque party, and not a job interview. Haven’t you got anything less… official?”
“You really think so? I don’t want to disappoint your parents,” I genuinely said, as I wasn’t convinced about changing out of my attire. Maybe it was a bit solemn, but I was to make my first impression, and I wanted it to be prodigious.
“They’re gonna love you regardless of what you’re going to wear,” Baekhyun spoke confidently, not even doubting my ability to make his parents fond of me.
“How can you be so calm? I’ve been a bundle of nerves the entire week,” I admitted, and Baekhyun chuckled boyishly, effortlessly making my heart pound as if I had a mini-heart attack. “I can’t be the only one freaking out.”
“I just know there’s nothing to be afraid of,” Baekhyun stated casually, as I waited for elaboration. “Almost two years ago, my brother introduced his girlfriend, and it wasn’t a big deal, so why should our situation be any different?”
“Hmm… I don’t know… maybe because we’re faking it?” I concluded, having another mini-panic attack. “Your mother must be one of these women with a lie detector in her eyes, we’re gonna get caught. I know it,” and there it was, full mode of an anxiety attack.
“Relax,” Baekhyun calmly commanded, as he placed his hands on my shoulders, making me look into his eyes as if it was to soothe me. Quite contrary to his intentions, his deep tranquil gaze put me in the even more nervous state. “It’s going to be fine; it’s just a barbeque, not an interrogation. No one will find out.”
“Right,” I answered, though I wasn’t entirely convinced.
“Okay, so get changed, you don’t want to be late, do you?” Baekhyun challenged, and I shook my head. Arriving late wouldn’t be the best first impression, and I must’ve not let that happen. “Put something more casual.”
“Ugh, fine,” I replied, though much unwillingly. “Just wait here,” I said before I locked myself in my bedroom, throwing everything out of my closet, seeking anything remotely less formal. It wasn’t as easy as Baekhyun made it out to be, but when he saw me in the same shirt, a pair of shorts and trainers, he approved it despite it being only slightly different.
“Please tell me you packed only casual clothes,” Baekhyun spoke, as I rolled my tiny suitcase out of my bedroom.
“Only T-shirts and sweatpants,” I retorted, and Baekhyun nodded, happy that I wasn’t so stressed anymore.
“Okay, we should go now. Otherwise, we’re seriously going to be late.”
  ***
  “Who are you texting so passionately? You’ve been on your phone the entire ride,” Baekhyun asked, somewhat fed up with the lack of the conversation. The radio was on the whole time, and he tapped his fingers against the steering wheel in the rhythm, but it still didn’t make up for my uninterested hums whenever he asked me something. “Are you seeing anybody?” he added, and I perked up my head when I registered what he said.
“What?” I looked at him, perplexed. He thought I was dating? How ridiculous! At the moment, it wasn’t possible; I was still hooked up on him. “No, I’m not dating anyone.”
“Then who are you texting with that big smile?”
“Jiwoo,” I answered shortly, locking my phone, letting her spam my inbox. “We’re going shopping for her wedding dress on Tuesday, and right now, she’s looking them up online.”
“Oh… well… I thought we were sick and tired of the wedding. What has changed?” Baekhyun spoke, sounding very much disappointed and deceived. I mean… we had never been particularly ecstatic about the whole thing, but now my attitude did a 180. Admittedly, picking the wedding dress was the second best thing about being Jiwoo’s bridesmaid. (First thing was obviously getting to see Baekhyun.)
“Nothing has changed,” I quickly answered, not wanting him to think that I was pretending to be fed up with Jiwoo’s shenanigans regarding her wedding. Multiple times, she or Hongbin had made me regret agreeing to become the bridesmaid, but planning the purchase of her wedding dress – it was an entirely different thing. “TLC has brainwashed me, and I think I’ll enjoy helping her pick her dress even if she ignores my opinion. You can’t blame me for being a girl, girls love shopping for clothes.”
“If you put it that way…” Baekhyun nodded his head, now understanding my point of view. “Then I can only hope you two have fun.”
“Thanks,” I replied casually, quickly unlocking my phone, eager to check out more screenshots Jiwoo had sent me. Just like I expected, during my short conversation with Baekhyun, Jiwoo had managed to forward over twenty pictures of gorgeous gowns.
“Have you ever thought about what you’re going to tell your mother about me? You know… how we met, when we started dating, and other stuff like that?” I asked, though my eyes were trained on the screen, zooming in and out the pictures, studying the tiniest details.
“Not really,” Baekhyun answered, and I hummed, trying not to show any disappointment; I had been stressing out for the entirety of the week, whereas he hadn’t given any fucks about it. “I mean… I thought about it, but I haven’t come with anything substantial. Have you?”
“Actually, I assumed you would have everything figured out by the time you come to pick me up,” I confessed, though not confidently. “But I guess we can act normal as much as it’s possible, and when somebody asks a question about our ‘relationship’ one of us has to make something up, and the latter must play along. What do you think?”
 “Yeah, let’s do that,” Baekhyun agreed, and I smiled, contended that he liked my idea. “What about skinship? My mother is a devil, and she pays a lot of attention to it. She’s going to sense that something’s off if we leave space for Jesus between us.”
“Seriously?” I asked, quite surprised that Baekhyun’s mother didn’t mind her son being all touchy-feely with his girlfriend right in front of her. Better yet, she preferred seeing her son passionate and demonstrative. “It’s okay,” I spoke, and Baekhyun tore his gaze away from the road to look at me, astounded. “What? It’s not that we’re going to fuck on the dinner table halfway through the meal, so it should be okay.”
“Really? I didn’t expect you to be so cool about it.” Baekhyun replied, but when he realized my exasperated glare, he wished he had bitten his tongue. For him, I must’ve looked angry, but in reality, I was just mildly insulted with no intentions of correcting him. I needed him to elaborate on why he thought I wouldn’t be cool about him touching me.
“And why is that?” I teased, trying my best to sound serious.
“It’s nothing,” Baekhyun said, attempting to dismiss the topic.
“Please, do tell,” I urged him, expecting to hear something I already know. “I’m really curious; why do you think I wouldn’t be cool about it?”
“You won’t let it go, will you?” Baekhyun asked, and I firmly nodded my head. I was stubborn just like Baekhyun, and I wouldn’t stop pestering him until he told me what he meant. “I mean… not in a bad sense… but I have never seen you affectionate with a man… well… at least not in front of me… so I just assumed you must be very private and… well… not so fond of public display of affection.”
“Hmm… so in your opinion, I’m a prude,” I concluded, and Baekhyun chuckled nervously, definitely not enjoying our conversation. “Wow, a prude! Thank you so much.”
“I didn’t mean it in a bad sense,” Baekhyun defended himself, and I remained silent, curious what else he could say to make the situation even worse. “And I’ve never called you a prude, all I said was that whenever you date you probably don’t make out in front of everyone, making all single people feel even more miserable.”
“Well… you’re right, I don’t do that,” I agreed, remembering how many times Jiwoo and Hongbin had made out in front of us. (Way too many to keep track of it.) “I’m not a prude, though.”
“That’s good, prude people are boring.”
  ***
  “Are you ready?” Baekhyun asked when he pulled over in front of his parents’ house.
Waiting for my response, Baekhyun turned off the engine and looked at me.
“Turn the car around,�� I spoke, certain that I wasn’t ready to face his parents. Not now, pretending his girlfriend, probably still not ready even if we were dating for real. “I’m calling it off, I can’t do it,” I blabbered, knowing another mini-anxiety attack was to kick in.
“Hey, hey, hey,” Baekhyun whispered, as he held my hand, thinking it would calm me down. “Relax, we’ve come so far, we can’t bail now,” he spoke, but I shook my head, denying his every word. It wasn’t right for his family. It wasn’t right for me, either. I had agreed to it impulsively because of my attraction, and now, I was about to make a fool out of myself. I should have known better not to act on my feelings. “Besides, the hardest part is already passed us,” he added, but it didn’t matter. I couldn’t do it.
“Baekhyun, I can’t,” I spoke, my voice weak. “They don’t deserve being lied to. We’re going to get caught, and when that happens, they’re going to hate me.” I blathered, starting to suffocate in the car. Although I rarely get stressed, Baekhyun’s precarious request was to make me faint out of fuss. “Let’s get out of here.”
“Calm down,” Baekhyun cooed, tucking my hair behind my ear. “Everything’s alright, we can do this,” he added, and I looked at him, seeking serenity and assurance in his eyes. Regardless of how many doubts I had, Baekhyun seemed confident that we could get through this. “Just trust me; I wouldn’t bring you here if I didn’t think we could make it.”
“I trust you,” I replied, and when I was to grace him with a reassuring smile, I jumped in my seat when someone knocked on the car’s window. Perplexed, I turned to see a cute elderly couple smiling at Baekhyun.
“Don’t worry about anything. See? They already love you,” Baekhyun mentioned, and I smiled at him nervously knowing it’s too late to butt out. “Come on, it’s show time.”
Baekhyun got out of the car, and I hesitantly followed suit.
“What took you so long? Everybody’s starving, but your dad didn’t want to start without you,” Baekhyun’s mother said as she embraced her son tightly as if he just returned from war.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Baekhyun nonchalantly spoke, smiling at me. “We came earlier than you told us to,” he candidly said as he stretched his arm to lace our fingers, wanting to introduce me.
“Is she your girlfriend?” Baekhyun’s dad asked, genuinely happy that his son was finally seeing someone. Proudly, Baekhyun nodded his head, and then his dad smiled at me, shaking hands with me.
“At last you brought someone!” His mother cheered, as she pushed Baekhyun aside to give me a robust hug, almost crushing my bones. “Your father and I thought you would never introduce any girl to us, but thankfully we were wrong.”
“Gee, thanks,” Baekhyun chimed in, staring at his mother clung onto my tensed body. “You also thought I’d drop from college, and then what happened?” Baekhyun sarcastically asked as he tried to disguise his discomfort and offense.
“We were proud of you then, and we’re proud of you now,” Baekhyun’s father defended them, as he looked at him and then at me, probably thinking how great of a couple we made. Too bad it was only a charade because no matter how compatible we seemed to other people, Baekhyun would never think about actually asking me out.
“How come I don’t believe you?” Baekhyun teasingly questioned, as he sneaked his arm behind my back, resting his hand on my hip. He had warned me about skinship, and when he showcased it in front of his parents, my cheeks flushed. In their opinion, he was being adorable and possessive, but I knew his affection was artificial and meaningless.
“Because you’re an ungrateful son,” Baekhyun’s mother jested, and I giggled at their interaction. I wished I had this kind of connection with my parents. “But we love you regardless, so why don’t we just go to the garden. Your brother is already preparing the grill, so we should supervise him before he and his girlfriend eat the whole food.”
“What do you say? Should we join them or just unpack first?” Baekhyun turned to me, looking down at me fondly. The way his eyes drill holes in mine could only one thing – he wanted me to stall the barbeque as if striving to discuss something.
“Let’s eat! I’m starving,” I replied enthusiastically, going against Baekhyun’s wishes. There was no point in discussing anything, but I was making my first impression, and I didn’t want them to think I was so shy I’d hide behind Baekhyun the entire gathering.
Displeased, Baekhyun squeezed my hand tighter, gritting through his teeth. “Sure, let’s eat first, your stomach was growling the entire ride,” he joked, and I jabbed him lightly, making their parents giggle at our playful contact.
When they led us further inside, I met the rest of Baekhyun’s family which included his brother with his girlfriend, two aunts with their husbands on Baekhyun’s father’s side and one uncle on his mother’s side.
At first, I was a bit intimidated and overwhelmed by their questioning but having drunk a bottle of chilled beer helped me keep my stress level in check. I was the newest member of their family, so their curiosity was understandable. Thankfully, just when the food was being served, Baekhyun’s brother announced that he and his girlfriend moved in together, and that revelation ultimately outshined my relationship with Baekhyun.
During the barbeque, Baekhyun was an absolute sweetheart; he cut the meat for me, he went inside for another beer when I finished one, he even wiped my elbow when I accidentally dirtied it with some ketchup. He was caring and thoughtful; his current behavior was even better than in my wildest daydreams.
“So… when have you started dating?” Baekhyun’s brother, Baekbeom, asked, fed up with the interrogation. Yes, he and his girlfriend of two years decided to live together, but on the other hand, his baby brother brought a girlfriend for the very first time.
Unsure, I looked at up Baekhyun, urging him to answer the question. We were in this together, but we were here because of him, so it only made sense for him to start replying. He would break the ice, and I’d follow suit, making our love story more natural.
“Not that long time ago,” Baekhyun started, as he put his bottle of beer on the wooden table. “As you might’ve heard, I’m Hongbin’s best man, and she’s Jiwoo’s maid of honor. And sometime between looking up perfect wedding locations and picking wedding invites I realized how difficult it’s going to be her friend, so I asked her out.” Baekhyun lied so confidently, I’d believe him if I didn’t know the truth. It was a cute story, and I wished it was true, although I knew it would never happen.
“Did she agree?” Baekbeom’s girlfriend, Mihyun, asked, engrossed by the story which was only a figment of Baekhyun’s imagination.
“Of course, she agreed!” Baekhyun spoke in a slightly louder voice as if he was offended by Mihyun’s inquiry. “Do you think we would be here together if she said no?”
“If he didn’t ask me out back then, I’d probably be the one to do it,” I interjected, making the whole table chuckle. Neither of it was true, so I assumed it wouldn’t hurt to boost his ego, especially when he was playfully bullied by his closest family members.
“Oh, I like that,” Baekhyun’s mother spoke, nodding her head, smiling at me. “Girls must be strong and independent these days. I like her, Baekhyun. You chose well.”
“Obviously,” Baekhyun agreed, leaning forward to peck my cheek. “I always choose what’s best,” he added, squeezing my hand. “So… is there any dessert? I’m craving your legendary cheesecake.” Baekhyun spoke excitedly, smoothly dodging an incoming series of questions.
“Of course,” Baekhyun’s dad hollered, as he rubbed his palms together, craving the mentioned cheesecake probably even more. “I’ll get it, honey,” he added, pecking his wife’s lips in the cutest of ways.
“Your parents are adorable,” I leaned and whispered into Baekhyun’s ear, and he giggled.
“What are you two lovebirds conspiring?” One of Baekhyun’s aunts asked, and Baekhyun sent her one of his brightest smiles.
“They probably can’t wait to be left alone,” Baekbeom commented, smirking at us. “They must still be in their honeymoon phase. Probably going at it like rabbits,” he added mischievously, getting jabbed by his girlfriend. “What? Am I wrong?” He inquired, and his mother shook her head disapprovingly, as she was more interested in the romantic part of our relationship. Frankly, I couldn’t blame her; I wouldn’t be keen on knowing all the details of my children’s sex life, either.
“Baekbeom, stop it,” Mrs. Byun scolded her elder son before she looked at Baekhyun. “Not in front of my cheesecake,” she jested when her husband walked out of the house with the dessert. “So… changing the subject, where did my son take you on a first date?”
“Hmm?” I hummed, buying myself some time, not wanting to blurt the first blatant lie which came to my stupid mind. “My first date with Baekhyun? Oh, he took me to the bowling alley. I had no idea what I was doing since it was my first time bowling, but he promised to teach me, and then he kicked my butt, although he said he wouldn’t.”
“I’m not even surprised,” Baekbeom spoke matter-of-factly, smirking playfully.
“That’s my son,” Mr. Byun interjected, earning a jab from his wife. “What? I didn’t say I approve of that. All I mean is that I’d do the same thing,” he added mischievously, leaning forward to plant a soft kiss on Mrs. Byun temple. “You love me anyway.”
“How have I dealt with such a brat like you so many years?”
“Like I said. You. Love. Me.” Mr. Byun articulated every word carefully, so the message would get through her thick head. Apparently, Baekhyun had taken stubbornness after his mother, whereas the playfulness after his father.
“Not in front of my bacon,” Baekhyun shouted, as he put a slice of grilled bacon into his mouth, disgusted by his parents’ affection. For someone who enjoyed public display of endearment, she surely didn’t mind demonstrating it, either.
“Don’t give me that attitude,” Mrs. Byun scolded Baekhyun, as she reached for the knife to cut her bakery masterpiece. “Would you like the first piece?” She asked me with a large piece of cake on a paper plate, and although I was already full, I couldn’t say no.
“Speaking of bacon,” started Baekbeom, “it was Baekhyun’s nickname in primary school. He was a bit chubby, and other kids kept calling him that. Has Baekhyun ever mentioned that?” Baekbeom asked, and I chuckled, wondering how cute he must’ve looked when he was a child. I probably wouldn’t be able to handle his cuteness.
“And who started calling me that?” Baekhyun looked at his older brother deadly as if he was ready to attack if he embarrassed him any further. “You; it was your fault I was bullied.”
“I don’t think he has,” I muttered, smiling warmly at Baekhyun. Of course, I didn’t know anything about his school years. We barely talked about current affairs, let alone our past experiences. Once or twice we had held a serious conversation, but it had never been of sorts. “But I bet he was the cutest boy in his class.”
“Oh, you’re right, honey,” Mrs. Byun agreed with me, promising to show me all of the family photos, and though I hated going through my old pictures, I’d gladly sneak a peek at Baekhyun’s. I believed that Mr. Byun had taken a few cringy ones for moments like this one.
“Don’t even think about it,” Baekhyun warned me, raising his finger as if I were a child. “No one’s seeing these pictures, especially not you,” he added, and I pouted, disappointed that I meant so little to him that he didn’t want to share the tiniest bit of his childhood memories with me. It felt like a punch in the face, and it hurt.
“How are Hongbin and Jiwoo doing?” Baekhyun’s father asked, trying to change the subject as he noticed my disappointment. My acting wasn’t as convincing as I thought it was, I concluded. Mr. Byun could see through my façade too quickly; I had to be more aware of my reactions.  I couldn’t let him fathom what was going on between his son and me.
“Fine, then forget that you’ll ever see mine,” I whined, trying my best to disguise my failure with playfulness before anyone else could grasp the situation.
Baekhyun, amused by my retort, only stuck out his tongue, and I elbowed him slightly.
“They’re busy with preparations. We barely managed to escape from their crazy demands,” Baekhyun explained truthfully, glad that we dismissed the ticklish topic. “We have our hands full with all the nuisance, but Hongbin and Jiwoo have at least twice as much work to do.”
“But Hongbin’s like our third son.” Mrs. Byun announced, feeling slightly sad because of his absence. “Besides, we haven’t even seen his fiancée. How could he not introduce her to us?” She wondered, as she cut the rest of the cheesecake, and distributed it among the other guests.
“I let him know that you miss him. He’ll be ecstatic to come here,” Baekhyun snickered, and his mother glared at him, not pleased with his tone. “He’ll pop up here in a heartbeat.”
“Or we can always visit you sometime, hoping Hongbin would be around. As you said, he’s super busy. It would be too much of a hassle for him to drive all the way here,” Mr. Byun reasoned, and everyone except for Baekhyun and me loved the idea. If his parents paid Baekhyun a visit, we would have to continue the charade. Maybe Baekhyun played his role perfectly, but with each minute into the act, I knew I’d fall for him more, and when the time of break-up would come, my heart was to wilt.
“Of course, that would be lovely,” Baekhyun said, but I knew he didn’t mind his words; he was panicking just like me. It was supposed to be a one-time thing. Well… maybe we’d have to perform at Hongbin’s wedding, but then the newlyweds would have all the attention. “Just let me know, so I can prepare the bedding for you.”
OK, I didn’t sign up for this, but I agreed to help him out, and it was a low blow to back out now. I’ve already fed them with lies; I might’ve as well conducted it to an inevitable end.
Shorty after the forced invitation, everyone focused on Baekbeom and his work. Or more precisely, on the work trip to Thailand where he’s going next week.
“Can I have a bite?” Baekhyun asked, pointing his fork at my plate with half-eaten cheesecake. Mrs. Byun had made a delicious dessert, but I was already full of all the meat that Baekhyun had put on my plate, and I just couldn’t finish it.
“Sure,” I replied happily, pushing my plate closer to Baekhyun. Excitedly, Baekhyun licked his lips, as he stared at the cheesecake, digging his fork in it, taking the largest bite I have ever seen. “Seriously?” I asked, a bit too loud, obtaining a lot of unnecessary attention.
With his mouth full, Baekhyun tried to defend himself, but I had no idea what he was trying to say. But seriously; if he wanted to devour the rest of my dessert, he just had to ask. I’d give him anything he would ask me to.
“They’re adorable, aren’t they?” Mrs. Byun cooed when Baekhyun was stuffing his mouth with the remaining of my dessert, while I was trying to steal the plate back.
“Sharing is caring,” Baekhyun whined, still chewing. This guy was incredible – how the hell have I fallen for this one when so many other men were available? I just stared at him; he was chewing with his mouth open the food he shamelessly stole.
God, I really adore him.
“It gets a bit cold, don’t you think?” Mr. Byun asked his wife, who immediately understood what he meant by that.
“Why don’t you take your luggage to your room, and then show her around the neighborhood? The night is delightful; you two should take a stroll.” Mrs. Byun said, and though she tried to force another romantic gesture out of him, I was thankful for that because we could stop pretending for a while.
“Should we do that?” Baekhyun inquired, looking at me with his sparkly eyes. Did he really expect me to take down that offer? Quickly, I nodded, and Baekhyun rose from his seat, stretching his arm to take my hand and help me stand up.
Afraid that his mother could be spying on us, Baekhyun refused to let me carry my own baggage. I wasn’t going to oppose his offer, though. My suitcase was rather heavy, and if Baekhyun was willing to help, even though only to keep up the appearances, I was thankful.
After a lot of complaining and cursing, we reached Baekhyun’s room. It wasn’t anything special; a simple bed with a yoga mat placed next to it, a desk with old notebooks, a bookcase with dozens of comic books, and a wardrobe.
“Do you want a blanket or a hoodie?” Baekhyun asked as he placed our luggage beside the desk. “It may be a lot colder in an hour.”
“There’s no need; I’ve brought a sweater. Wait for a second,” I replied, as I opened my suitcase, and threw everything on the floor, seeking for that particular piece of clothing. “OK, I’m ready, we can go now.”
The moment we assumed we were a decent distance away from his family, we could finally relax. Taking deep breaths, we strolled down the pavement side by side. They couldn’t hear us conspire, and it was calming to talk to him without anyone just waiting for me to make a mistake and completely blow my cover.
“For one second I thought your father caught me,” I told, relieved that in the end, Mr. Byun didn’t confront us about our little act.
“My dad? No way! He’s like the most oblivious person I know,” Baekhyun retorted, and I bit my tongue before I told Baekhyun I couldn’t agree with him. If anything, he still had no idea about my feelings, so this title should belong to him.
“Yes way!” I shouted, laughing. “He gave me that you won’t fool me look.”
“Don’t worry about him. He’s harmless. But on the other hand, there’s my mother. I can bet that by the time we get back, she’ll have our wedding all planned out. Seriously, she’s annoying beyond human’s endurance.” Baekhyun warned me, and I laughed, hoping he was exaggerating. She couldn’t be that bad. Or could she? “She’s probably interrogating my brother, demanding grandkids.”
“She can’t be that bad,” I said, hoping I was right. I knew her for a couple of hours, and she seemed to be lovely. “Let’s not worry in advance, though. We did a pretty good job, didn’t we?” I sighed in relief, smiling because we survived the barbeque without getting caught red-handed. “So, why don’t you want me to see your baby photos?”
“Well… I didn’t think you’d be interested,” Baekhyun answered honestly, looking down at his shoes. “I was a chubby kid, and these photos are hideous. I’d burn them if I could; trust me,” he explained, and now, I seriously wanted to have a peek. It couldn’t be that bad.
“I highly doubt that,” I chimed in, wondering how Baekhyun looked when he was little. Even with some fat, he must’ve been the most adorable kid in the entire school. “Any other interesting secrets you have there?”
“I’m not giving secrets for free, you know…”
“Oh, ask away. I have nothing to hide,” I said confidently, but then that one college memory flashed in the back of my mind, and I felt sick. I hadn’t told it anyone; only Jiwoo knew about it, and I wondered if confiding to Baekhyun the truth would help me close that chapter once and for all.
“You look like you want to say something,” Baekhyun remarked, as he read my expression.
“I guess I do, but it’ll totally ruin the mood,” I tried to joke, but Baekhyun seemed oddly solemn and mature. It was out of his typical silly character, right now, he looked as if he was ready to hold me in his arms if I burst out in tears.
“I don’t mind; we’re friends and friends are out there for each other for the better or worse,” Baekhyun said, and I smiled warmly at the fact that he actually stated that I could rely on him. We barely hung out, yet he proved to be a better friend than I had expected him to be. “And if you need another incentive then fine, you’re allowed to look through my childhood photos,” Baekhyun added, and I barely managed to keep my cool.
Baekhyun was silly and playful, but when needed he was very supportive and considerate. And besides his marvelous inside, he was incredibly good-looking on the outside. He was a walking perfection, and I almost teared up when he held my hand reassuringly.
“My deepest secret? Let me think.” I sighed, trying to voice my thoughts coolly. It had been almost two years ago, and I didn’t want to seem pathetic and petty in front of him.
OK, men up for the fuck’s sake! You’re a grown-up woman! Say it quickly! Don’t run around the bush. Just tell him that at the drop of a hat! It’s no big deal. I preached to myself, looking at my shoes nervously. Finally, I gathered the courage to recount that nightmare.
“I’m all ears,” Baekhyun added, swinging our locked hands back and forth. The atmosphere was serene; the warm wind blew gently, his eyes were trained on the path ahead, my heart was pounding next to him.
“I’ve never told this anyone,” I started, looking everywhere but Baekhyun’s side. I wouldn’t finish my confession if he looked me in the eyes. “During my sophomore year, I was dating this guy named Jungkook. Things were going smoothly between us, and I was slowly falling in love with him. But apparently, I didn’t mean to him as much as he meant to me.” I said, and Baekhyun remained quiet, drawing circles with his thumb on my hand.
“One time, there was a party; he wanted to go, but I was snowed under my notes because I had an exam the next day. Jungkook went alone, and I stayed in my room studying. But shortly before midnight, I ditched because I knew I wasn’t going to learn anything. And when I finally found him, he was in a room nailing another chick.”
Jungkook was my first serious boyfriend, and it hurt like a bitch.
“And here comes the best. The cherry on the top of a fucking cake; this girl he cheated me on with was Jiwoo.” I confessed, and Baekhyun stopped dead in his track, yanking me gently, forcing me to look him in the eye. His grip tightened, but I didn’t dare to meet his gaze.
“Before Jiwoo met Hongbin, she was a completely different person. She was a seducer, living for attention. It was foolish of me to expect her not to chase after him.” I explained harshly. “But on the bright side, she helped me get rid of him before I seriously fell for him. He wasn’t worthy of me if he couldn’t resist her.”
“How can you still be friends with her after what she did to you?” Baekhyun asked as he couldn’t completely comprehend the situation.
“I gave her a second chance, and she promised to change. Shortly after that incident, she met Hongbin, and she truly changed.” I answered honestly, even if Baekhyun thought I was an idiot for not cutting her out of my life. I’d kept her around, but I didn’t forget what she had done. (And probably never will.) Jiwoo was to start anew with Hongbin and never fail my trust again. I believed in her.
“Wow.”
“Yeah, but it’s in the past. I’ve moved on,” I lied, hoping Baekhyun wouldn’t realize it. It happened years ago, but I was still petrified at the thought of introducing my new boyfriend to her, afraid of such history repeat itself. She was in a serious relationship with Hongbin, but it was stronger than me to picture her hands on my man. “Can we go back now? It gets cold, and I really want to go through your family photos.”
  ***
  With our hands still interlocked we reached the house; by the time we arrived, everything was cleaned, and all the guests moved the party inside.
Despite my sad confession, Baekhyun had changed the topic, and when we were standing on the porch, I was laughing so hard my stomach was beginning to hurt.
“Are you ready?” Baekhyun asked, being willing to give me a few more minutes before we would have to get back into the act. It was considerate of him, and I gladly agreed to hang out for a little longer. My chances of spending some quality time with him were limited, so I was determined to make the best of it.
“I may be seeing things, but I think I just saw your mother peeking through the curtains,” I leaned and whispered into Baekhyun’s ear. We were absent for quite a while, and she might’ve been worried or just curious about our interaction when we were alone.
“Really?” Baekhyun mused, giggling. “Do you think we should give her a show she wants so much?” he asked, and I cocked my eyebrow at him, wondering if he was thinking the same. Did he seriously want to make out in front of his mother? There was nothing I wanted more, but was it okay to use the situation like that? I wanted him to kiss me because he wanted to, not because he had to prove something.
“Let’s do this,” I encouraged him, sliding my hands into the back pockets of his trousers.
Gently, Baekhyun brushed some stray hair off my face. His eyes searched mine, and I’d melt unless his hands kept me in place. Licking his lips, he leaned forward, and our lips locked in a delicate kiss. After a few seconds, he started to move, and I mirrored his actions and pace.
His lips were soft, and his kisses were perfect. Maybe it was embarrassing, but I was already turned on, and ready to take the fun to another level or two.
“Wow,” I said in wonder when he pulled away to take a breath. His lips were addicting, and I had to have another taste, so I urgently pulled him against me. Due to my clumsiness, I stumbled backwards, Baekhyun’s chest pressed tightly against me, and now, I was squeezed between him and the porch’s railing with no chance of escaping.
He was so close to me, with his hands on my hips, kissing my breath away. I could stay in this moment forever; his mouth on mine, gently nipping my bottom lip, urging me to let him deepen the kiss.
“Baekhyun,” I murmured, and he took his chance and pushed his tongue into my mouth. He kissed me as if wanted to do that for an extremely long time, but I had to remind myself he was solely doing it to keep up the appearances. Baekhyun was trying to convince his family that he belonged with me, and if I didn’t know the context of our kiss, he’d have fooled me too.
When kissing Baekhyun, it was ridiculously easy to forget the surrounding and get lost in the romantic sensation. One of us moaned at some point, and though I wasn’t sure who, I had a feeling it was me since I was kissing him for real, pouring all of my emotion in it.
It was probably my first and last chance to do so, and I couldn’t waste such a lifetime opportunity. Some people wouldn’t be able to look at their soul mate, yet I got to kiss mine, and it was another reason to stop considering myself the unluckiest person on Earth. I got to experience it, and I was going to cherish every second of this memory.
“It was…” Baekhyun started, as he pulled away. His hands were still holding the back of my head, and he was staring into my eyes. It was too much for me; I had to look away in embarrassment. A little bit caught off guard, Baekhyun cleared his throat and said, “I think she bought it. She shouldn’t cause any more trouble.”
“Yeah, that’s good,” I said awkwardly, looking at him scratch the back of his head in chagrin. “I’d hate to get caught,” I added, smiling as the warmth gradually cool down. Baekhyun’s plain words were like a bucket of ice-cold water poured on my boiling heart; only the smoke of disappointment hung in the air.
“Let’s get inside,” Baekhyun mentioned, as he led me inside. It was a bit disheartening to watch him being so casual; as if we hadn’t just made out. He didn’t dwell on what kind of emotions he made me feel, and thinking about it pained me physically.
  ***
  When we got inside his parents’ house, everyone either returned home or was getting ready to sleep. Baekhyun and I weren’t that much different; we lied about being exhausted, and easily sneaked into his room.
Once sheltered behind the doors, I lay down on Baekhyun’s old bed, while Baekhyun looked for his pajamas, which consisted of an old T-shirt and sweatpants. Quietly, he left the room to change, and when he came back in his sleepwear, he was still ridiculously attractive.
Now, I was confident I had a problem, and this problem had a name, and he hung around quite often. With each passing minute, my infatuation grew stronger; by the day of Jiwoo’s wedding, my heart would burst out of the unrequited feelings.
When around him, for the first time in my life, I felt alive. And now, having tasted the heaven, I assumed it was about time to learn how to live without him. This short journey helped me realize how it would feel to be with him, and because he had no feelings for me, I should stop lying to myself and look for someone who could love me back.
At some point, I felt stronger and more mature.
“What are you thinking about?” Baekhyun asked, sitting beside me on his bed. “Your eyebrows crease as if you’re in pain,” he added, and I tried to relax. Baekhyun was beginning to suspect something, and I couldn’t let him find out, and expose myself to the mortification that would follow my shameful confession.
“I was thinking about how much work we still have regarding Jiwoo’s wedding,” I lied, and Baekhyun understood my evident displeasure. It was probably the last chance to relax before we would get snowed under another shitload of planning.
“Well… you’re right.” Baekhyun agreed with a deep sigh. “You can go change, the bathroom is the second door on the left,” he instructed, and I got off the bed to look for my pajamas in the pile of my stuff next to my empty suitcase.
“Ummm… Baekhyun? Do you think I could borrow one of your shirts? Because you rushed me back then, I forgot to pack my pajamas.”
“Are you seriously going to blame me for it?” Baekhyun asked, trying to refrain from laughing. “Wow,” he added, as he stood up and walked to his wardrobe. “Here.” Baekhyun handed me an oversized T-shirt and a pair of old sweatpants.
When I came back, changed and with brushed teeth, Baekhyun was one the yoga mat, trying to find a comfortable position in which he could survive the night. Watching him gingerly, I strutted to the bed and hid under the covers.
“This is absurd,” Baekhyun groaned, and I watched him wiggle from beneath the duvet. “I think I’ll take the couch in the living room.” He announced as he picked up the pillow.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I said before he left the room. “Just sleep next to me. It’s not like we’ve never shared a bed before.” I reasoned, and Baekhyun looked at me, thinking about his decision. True, we had slept together a few times before. Also true, the bed is smaller with each time. “Just come here already. Unless you want your mother to think that we’re fighting.”
“God no, just scoot over.”
  ***
  When I woke up, Baekhyun was gone. Nonetheless, I could feel his presence; his scent lingered in the air, his stuff was scattered all over the floor, and his phone buzzed every ten seconds when he got a text message.
It was 9 o’clock.
Not bothering to change into my clothes, I walked downstairs. Baekhyun’s father was in the living room watching the news, while Mrs. Byun was making a mess in the kitchen, preparing the breakfast.
“Oh, you’re awake.” She said when I entered the kitchen, “Baekhyun’s out for fresh rolls.” Mrs. Byun answered my question which I was about to ask. “How did you sleep tonight?” She looked at me as if she knew that I shared the bed with Baekhyun, but decided not to mention that fact.
“Like a log, actually,” I said, sighing, as I remembered how Baekhyun was hugging me when I woke up in the middle of the night. Our limbs were tangled, and he held me close. It was incredibly comfortable, and it broke my heart a little to know it would never happen again.
“Do you want some coffee?” Mrs. Byun asked as the kettle started to whistle. I nodded, and although I offered her my help, she firmly refused. According to her, I was a guest, and she couldn’t bother me with housework despite my need to impress her. “Baekhyun’s so happy with you.” She stated, catching me off guard with her statement. “Maybe, he doesn’t love you as much you love him yet, but give him some time, he’s getting there.”
“You really think so?” I asked, trying not to sound pathetically hopeful. She was his mother, but she was fooled by our acting. She didn’t know the truth, and she was misreading the situation. He only seemed infatuated because we made it look like it. And no matter how poignant it was of me, I still wished she was right.
“Of course!” Mrs. Byun said confidently, and I sent her a feeble smile. “I know my son, and I know when he’s happy. When he came downstairs earlier, he was radiating. What did you do at night? I didn’t hear a thing!”
“We didn’t do anything!” I protested, and she laughed loudly at my embarrassment and timidity. “Really!”
“If that’s true, then you must mean to him much more than I assumed.”
“Oh.”
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