#honestly. my asks are always open. just send me your opinion even if anonymously. i want to know

[iangallagherisadeadman]

[empress-simps]

Letters To My Lupin

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Fem! Reader CW: Occasional swearing but that’s about it. Genre: Fluff

Summary: Remus decided to find out who’s behind giving him little notes and chocolates ever since his fourth year at Hogwarts that made him fall in love.

Note: It’s time for my man’s fic! (Don’t let Regulus see this) This is just pure fluff guys (and self-indulgent tbh) please enjoy! I had so much fun making this! (The song I listened to while making this is Hey Lover! - Wabie, you guys might want to listen to it while reading this ;) ) Photos used are from Pinterest! Credits to the owner!

‘The man that you are, Remus Lupin. It honestly drives me crazy.’

Normally, this would be weird and downright creepy for other people if they receive this kind of note from an anonymous sender— but for Remus, it isn’t.

Remus feels his brows raise, a small smile grazes upon his lips, chuckling to himself as he folds up the small piece of paper and tucks it to his cardigan pocket, quite amused. It sort of became a part of his routine to receive letters and chocolates (mainly kisses) from his secret admirer almost every day since the start of their fourth year.

He found it weird at first, feeling a bit creeped out as he thought it was a bit stalkerish. He would find random notes to his bed with a Hershey’s kiss after taking a shower or when he got back from classes, on some occasions it will be delivered through the owl in the great hall (which was quite embarrassing in his opinion). He often catches himself waiting for the little note and chocolates to just magically appear wherever he is at the moment.

As time passed, he was actually looking forward to the little harmless notes he receives. It felt surprisingly good? Somehow, his heart fills with warmth and a smile subconsciously forms on his lips. He even has a small box hidden under his bed which was filled with the little notes you send him throughout the years.

It makes him feel like he could be loved; he’s worthy of being loved.

He took the Hershey’s chocolate bar that came along with the note, opening it and taking a bite. Seems like his secret admirer was feeling pretty generous today.

“Moony, can I have some?” Sirius asks, eyeing the chocolate in his friend’s hands.

“No. It’s mine.”

“Aw come on! Are you seriously still upset I just took one kiss from your not-so-hidden stash?! You’ve got loads of ‘em mate!” Sirius threw his arms up in the air, complaining. “It’s mine, Pads. Go buy yours.” He reasons out but breaking a piece off his chocolate bar and giving some to an awaiting and smug Sirius.

“It tastes better when it’s free,”

“Seems like Moony got a note, huh?” James teased, elbowing the tall werewolf as he saw the paper poking out of the pocket of Remus’ cardigan and the chocolate in his hands.

“What does it say, Moons?” Peter asked curiously.

Remus blushed, a shade of pink dusting his face as he shakes his head.

“Come on, Moony! You always used to tell us!” Sirius whines tugging Remus’ arm, shaking his dear friend. James laughed, a sudden glint in his eye. “Pads, stop it- “cue a protest from Sirius. “Our Moony’s blushing!” James teased in a sing song voice. “Oh sod off, Prongs!” Remus retorts back.

“You think we don’t notice mate?”

Remus fell silent, flustered. Prongs caught him off guard. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Prongs- “

“You’re in love, Moony.” Sirius cuts him off, smiling cheekily at one of his best mates. Remus raised an eyebrow and “You think I would fall for a person who sends me letters anonymously?”

“Well, yes?” Sirius smiled sheepishly as Remus shot him an unimpressed look. “You’re secretly a hopeless romantic, Moony. Don’t think we don’t notice you reading those romance books when you thought no one is looking.” Peter joined in, smiling.

He just sighs, rubbing his hands on his face. He can’t deny it, they’re right. It makes him feel stupid that he felt attraction to whoever is sending letters to him, but he can’t help it.

“Y/n, you’re seriously going to make the poor boy have diabetes by the time he turns 21.” Your friend shakes her head, seeing the overflowing number of chocolates scattered on your bed as you decide what to give him throughout the week.

“He just looks so adorable; I can’t help it!” You reasoned out, finally picking up the Reese cups at the foot of your bed and deciding you (more like your owl) will give it to him tomorrow.

“Merlin’s beard, Y/n! You’re so fucking in love with Remus Lupin. You’ve probably already spent hundreds of galleons already just to get your hands on muggle chocolate.” She told you, knowing that you bribed one of your muggle born classmates to buy you some during the break.

“Not hundreds, probably around a thousand?” You shrugged, grabbing a quill and a piece of parchment, smiling to yourself as you write. “Y/n! You’ve got to be kidding me!” Your friend exclaimed, stunned.

“Eh, it’s alright.” You waved her off, folding the piece of parchment and attaching the chocolate to it.

“I’m seriously gonna tell Sirius one of these days that you’re the one who sends love letters to his friend.”

“And I’m also gonna seriously tell him that you secretly wish you would date each other.”

Remus stared at the Reese Cup and note that was delivered in front of him as he ate breakfast in the great hall. A small smile crept through his lips as he opened the note. ‘I hope you like Reese cups :) Have a great day!’

The owl hoots, trying to get Remus’ attention. “Ah yes, I almost forgot. Sorry!” He took out a treat, feeding it to the owl before grabbing the little note he made, tying it securely so it wouldn’t fall. “Give that to your owner, yeah?” The owl then flew away.

“Finally making a move, Moony?” Sirius asked, smirking as he saw the whole interaction. “I guess? I need to find out who’s been sending them before we graduate, because I might never get the chance to.”

“Oh my Merlin! You wouldn’t believe it! Remus just sent me a letter!” You exclaimed, entering your dorm room, expecting your friend to be there.

Well she is, but two things were out of the ordinary: A boy was in your dorm room hanging out with your friend, and it was Sirius Black. Your stomach dropped. “Ah shit.” You mumbled, feeling the heat creep up your cheeks. You couldn’t even look at him, worried he’ll tease you and you just might combust from the utter embarrassment you’re feeling.

“I see you’re the one who’s sending our Moony little notes?” He grinned, acknowledging you. All you could do was mutter a small “Yeah.” wanting the castle floors to swallow you whole now.

“It’s alright, Y/n. I’m pretty sure he’s already head over heels for you. He might just marry you then and there when you finally decide to meet him.” Sirius chuckles.

“Sirius! What does it say, Y/N?” Your friend asks, clearly happy and eager for you.

“He wants to meet me,” You blushed as Sirius whistled and your friend squeals.

“That’s my Moony!”

“That’s great! When?”

You gulped, “Later evening, an hour before our Astronomy class shared with Gryffindors.”

To say that you were nervous was an understatement. Your felt your heart rate pick up every time you heard footsteps echoing, getting closer to your meeting place for it to only pass by. You kept having these mini heart attacks every now and then as you patiently waited for Remus to (hopefully) arrive.

“Y/n?” A voice called out, making you turn your head in that direction.

Remus felt his world stop, seeing the girl who took his breath away since they were first years. You offered him a nervous smile as he slowly walked towards her.

He would never admit it, but he secretly pictured you to be the one that was writing notes and giving him those chocolates that made his day. It was probably the main reason why he felt attracted to the person behind the notes and chocolates he receives. Although he made himself believe it was far from the truth, there is no way you would’ve done those when there were more good-looking guys other than him.

Except it was real. You’re standing in front of him and looking up with those eyes of yours that seem to enchant him and make him fall for you even deeper. “Hi, Rems.” Biting your lip nervously, calling him by the nickname you gave him in your letters.

 Merlin, maybe Sirius is right; he might marry you right there and then.

[jilyawards]

I think people have legitimate concerns about the awards since every year there seems to be some kind of drama that often results in people leaving the fandom.

The responses to these anons have been passive aggressive and defensive and have only fuelled the flames without taking into account the history of these awards and the ways people have been hurt by them before. You might be new to running the awards, but the awards have a long history that honestly hasn't always been good.

As mods you're hiding behind anonymity, which I understand considering the hate that the mods have received in the past, but it does add to the level of distrust around the awards and if you're so scared of getting hate about a project that you won't put your name to it, isn't that a sign that maybe it's time to let that project go?

It also means I don't feel like I can send you a message that's not anon because I don't know who I'm speaking with and there's no opportunity for open discourse.

We understand people have had issues with how the awards were run in the past - that is an unfortunate fact we inherited when we took ownership of the blog. We can not change the past. We can only operate in the present so we did all we could within our power to make it as fair and fun a process as we possibly could:

We turned the awards blog into a year round thing, we accepted any fic that came in so long as it was Jily. We posted those recs every single month without fail.

We offered the ability to opt out - something that has been used historically - so anyone who wanted to opt out for whatever reason could. We said we didn’t need a reason, we didn’t ask for one because we respect peoples opinions and want to opt out. We even extended the branch to those who opted out last year but hadn’t messaged in this year to say they wanted to opt out again just in case someone forgot.

We offered even more categories for the chance at more opportunities to be named - so that those who write long vs short fics weren’t overshadowed. I will stand and name myself as one of the people running this year if it puts and end to this unnecessary back and forth with an anonymous person or persons. You are welcome to come and DM me.

I Ray, @charmsandtealeaves have been doing my best for this fandom for the better part of the past two years.

I’m sorry if you read our response as passive aggressive. I’ve stated that we wanted to be firm on our stance so you can interpret that as defensive if you want - because of course as one of the people behind the scenes doing all the admin hours I obviously think this venture is worthwhile. I haven’t won an award but I did enjoy the experience of seeing nominations and hyping up my friends. Which is why I stepped up when Ava left. I haven’t been around long enough to know the years of fandom drama and history behind a silly little awards thing, or who has apparent beef with whom - and frankly I don’t care. I’m here to read, write and share Jily fic.

The anon expressed concerns about people’s mental health over not winning. Mental health is a genuine concern and I am a massive advocate for it. However, I still believe if you only exist to create to win one of these awards then you’re creating for the wrong reason. And if you are upset because you weren’t nominated for an award - there is the option to nominate yourself and always has been because nominations are anonymous we don’t release how many times someone was nominated because that doesn’t matter it only takes one - if not being nominated is enough to leave the fandom over it… then I’m sorry but that’s something you personally need to work on and maybe you should start seeing this (being writing fic) for what it is - a hobby done for free and for fun.

I continued the anonymity left by Ava for this exact reason. Because no matter if I say so publicly or not there are going to be people who have strong opinions against the awards and they are entitled to them, and they are entitled not to participate. They are not however, entitled to keep sending messages that we shouldn’t exist because of something that happened years ago and because some don’t think they should exist at all. And I didn’t want that in my personal inbox but also understood that anonymous asks let people ask questions they might be too shy to ask public facing so they stayed on over here.

I’ve been the public face behind a lot of events over the last two years and that hasn’t stopped me getting anonymous messages about how I’m doing it all wrong. Or quite frankly worse ones that were derogatory and personal.

I’ve done what was asked. I addressed the concerns that came in the form of an anonymous ask politely and respectfully given this year’s history. I offered a poll as requested. If you read that response as passive aggressive well… that’s down to your interpretation. I’ve had enough of drama. And from all I’ve seen the drama stems from something I wasn’t even around for and has nothing to do with me, or how the awards have run this year. It has nothing to do with our current existence and the effort I’ve put in this year - both to the Jily awards all year, the gift exchange, Jilytoberfest, every Jilychallenge, Mystery Microfic May, jilymicrofics and the discord.

At the end of the day I’m here writing because I love Jily and I love all the people who come to read and enjoy what I put out too. But I will admit I’m tried of whatever this is.

If you want to, as you say have open discorse, my inbox is there, but I’ve said my piece and I respect their are different opinions but that’s not gonna change the awards being held this year. All posts are tagged so you can block them or this blog if you like. ~ Ray

[shoot-of-corruption]

Blog Announcement

Hi there my lovelies! It is a rare guest, Ria here :D

I put on an Oblivion Let's Play to hold my blood pressure low while formulating this announcement, so you better settle down with me xD

I would like to announce here how I will deal with my main blog and all my side blogs on tumblr from now on.

As most of you know, I am working a full time job in retail, so my nervous costume tends to be a tiny bit thin after around 9,5hrs of shift. I am happy to announce to you all that my time as a worker in retail is finally a finite one. If everything works out right, I won't just be able to start a homeoffice job by next year, but also live at a completely different place and city. Sadly there is still a good while of wait ahead of me until then and a lot of things are unsure as of yet. But I will do my best to get to that destination, because right now everything is pretty much murdering me.

What does that mean for my blogs? I have been on Hiatus for a long while, on and off, over years. And yet I have always returned here, more or less satisfied or happy with my performance or the RPC.

From this day on I will treat myself better about being able to come here and also, I will not spread myself thin anymore. I will transform Mariku into an Ask- and Art-Blog. Interactions are always welcome, on and off Anon, as well as dash commentary or writing pieces and updates of myself. You can tag Mariku and me in everything, the followed tags will stay the same, I will just update a few things on my BIO in the next days etc. [maybe I'll finally force myself to make a card, should the mobile pages not work anymore].

Things that will for the close future not be done on my blogs:

RP-Threads: no matter if long, short, or anything. I am torturing myself, because I cannot say no to new thread ideas and the moment I really get invested into plots, threads, ideas or anything alike, my partners tend to just leave and let me drop like a hot potato and I honestly neither need nor want that hate in my life anymore.

Anon-Hate: Will NOT be displayed on this channel. I will keep my Inbox with anonymous messages on, but every piece of disgusting hate will be immediately plucked out of the screen and burned in a bonfire. You will not get a stage here and you can be assured, that I will piss and shit on your disgusting hatred and then laugh about it for the coming week, because you are the most pathetic thing that I had the displeasure of even having to lay a momentary glance on <3

RPC/personal Drama: I will ignore drama and strictly remove myself from it. I will not be part or target of any hatred, impulsive meanness and/or random bouts of radical opinions. If you don't feel seen/represented in my opinions, turn around and find a place you fit into, but leave me and my muses alone.

Things that will be done on this blog (and partly my side blogs):

Ask-Memes: Of any kind. Ask-Plots, random asks, symbol ask memes, color memes, background memes, AU-memes and YES, also art related asks.

Open Commissions: I will open art commissions again after I had a bit more training on my tablet, for everybody, who wants to commission art. They will likely be limited and they may also for training reasons only be for free for training, thus included in art memes, but I will open paid commissions eventually again, definitely this year. I cannot tell you details, yet, but keep your eyes peeled ;)

IMs and Mun related things: You are definitely allowed to write IMs and ask me questions!! I am here to have fun as all of us are, so if your fun includes coming into my IMs and leaving a cat meme each day or send me weird asks, I am all here for it!! All of this might sound very dickish of me, but I just feel like I get too emotionally hurt and immersed and I want to protect me from bad feelings and you from my wrath xDDD

Thank you for reading all of this and I hope all of us can stick to those ground rules (for now) - we will get on peachy! If the fact that I am not RPing (for now) on here is breaking you beyond compare, I do own a Discord and I am usually willing to share it. Please contact me on here before adding me, so I know who exactly is adding me on there, otherwise, I might not accept your request. Discord: sangnoire

I will warn you though, that I will be very selective with accepting RPs and partners on there still and that any unwillingness to accept that will be met with... a uno-reverse card reaction x'D

[narcissa-black-supermacy]

mutuals you’re thankful for in 2022?

(I even did it on anon for you!!!)

thank you DEAR ANONYMOUS FRIEND whose identity i totally do not know lmao because its not like i asked you to send this to me whattt that would be embarrassing

here we go (in no particular order, this is the way it shows up in my following list)

@fonkeloog : thanks for going along with my nonsense and being open minded and supportive about everything i do even if it's not your thing. love seeing you in my notifications, always <3 your poems and photography are everything, i sincerely wish you all the success with that in 2023. here's to another wonderful year of football and memri memes and kilt smut and complete discord chaos.

@heartofspells : holliiiiiii where do i even begin. meeting you this year has been a fandom changing experience, truly. i love everything you create even if sometimes it makes me cry and kick things. i hope things get less hectic for you this year so you can rain on us with more angst and poetic porn. thank you for letting me rant and brainstorm ideas and you're always welcome to dump your thoughts on me whenever <3 i never don't enjoy hearing those. hope we get to spit even more this year together.

@tracingpatternswrites : mallllll my LOVE. i think you're my fandom soulmate. everything you write makes me lose my mind and i care about all your pieces as if they're my own. thank you for being the push and support i needed to explore new things and pairings this year (here's to more threesomes and incest in the upcoming year ahaha). ALSO. we should. totally co-write something this year. something horrific and ground shattering. (once i'm done with all my oneshots). the internet would never recover.

@soloorganaas : bestieeee. what do i even say? you're literally like the only one of two and a half people in total on this website (one of them being me lol) whom i trust blindly and completely with our boys and with wolfstar in particular. it either takes us 13 business days to get back to each other or we can talk for 3 hours straight non-stop. we should do more things like hanukka wolfstar this year. push our (correct) agendas in this fandom. co-writing something with you one day would be the dream. maybe sometime this year?

@sweetpeasandlilies : bruh with the amount of stuff you've been through this past year i'm surprised you're still on tumblr akjdgh so HUGE respect for that seriously. i'm still blocked by like 27 people because of you lmao but good riddance i guess. ain't nobody gonna stop us. i live for your writing and for your shitposts. honestly. its everything.

@padfootastic : dude what can i say?? a breathe of fresh fucking air is what you are on this hellsite. and i know you're busy as hell these days but seeing you on here and your ideas and your writing (and your tagsss bruh your tags i read all of those just so yknow) is one of the things keeping me from losing my mind in here. if we had fandom elections i would vote you in as the authority on everything james potter and sirius black. i trust no one but you.

@mxlfoydraco : serra <3333 i live for your tags. you put drarry and amazing (actually diverse) fanart and Correct Opinions on our dashes and i love you for that. this place would not have been the same without you. fandom is alive and flourishing thanks to people like you who comment and give reccs and keep older fics and fanarts alive (and ship jegulus without disrespecting Sirius the MVP Black) and i couldn't be more grateful. please keep blessing us with your presence and the legendary Queue.

@leogichidaa : your writing is honestly ground breaking, and the limitless creativity of your genius ideas never fails to amaze me. if i had to hire a team of writers for a canon marauders story, you would be the first on that list - we need more people who do reg and the others justice with their writing. i can't wait to see what else you will bless us with this upcoming 2023 <33

@artemisia-black : it's hard being a person with Correct Opinions(tm) on a site like tumblr in a fandom like the marauders but you are doing AMAZING. please never stop writing what you write and talking about the Blacks, people like you and your metas are the backbone of this fandom. wish i could make everyone sit down and read those before they touch our precious characters.

@sequinhaze : yazz! very excited and honoured to be calling you a mutual tbh, after i've been stalking your blog and writing forever now lol. you are Wrong about prongsfoot but i forgive you for that because you're Right about literally everything else and that's so much more important to me. i selfishly hope that you never stop writing for this fandom because you offer such a refreshing take on most characters and your characterisation is always on point. ily. wishing you peace and happiness this upcoming year (and wishing myself loads of unbreakable heaven porn w feelings).

@broomsticks : jackieeee you're one of the rare people in this fandom who is completely open minded to new ideas and dynamics, and is the definition of a multi-shipper. i don't think i know one single other person on this hellsite who likes both remadora and wolfstar and blackcest and peter and snape and isn't afraid to talk about it. alsoo! your tagging system. duude. i wish my blog looked like that wtf.

@elvendorx : (i forgot what your main blog is sorryyy) - we didn't really get a chance to interact much yet but i just wanted to let you know that your metas on the mwpp in general and james and sirius in particular are absolutely golden and i appreciate them so much. wish i could make it a legal requirement to fully read and sign those before anybody so much as thinks of writing about j&s. looking forward to more of you in 2023.

@roalinda : thank you for putting prongsfoot on my dash <33 we desperately lack content for them and even the blogs that do post about them are usually still centric around a different ship. we need more people like you honestly. and i looove your additions in the tags, always read those.

@squintclover : rorryyyyy <33 your microfics and your writing are everything. i love it. always appreciate seeing you on my dash. i hope we get more chances to interact this upcoming year and i can't wait to find out what you've got in store for us.

@benjamin-ovich : i just want to thank you for writing what is one of the most amazing and heart breaking prongsfoot masterpieces i've ever read. i still need to leave a proper comment on that which is not just me screaming incoherently but just know that i've gone back several times to reread some parts. especially the first chapter and the memories. ((the scene where sirius tries to roughly "fuck lily out of him" lives in my head rent free. literally. one of the hottest prongsfoot scenes in existence wtf)).

[grapecaseschoices]

i usually don't send asks and i would send this off anon, but im scared of getting hate on this, since ive seen quite a lot of discriminatory behaviour in if fandom spaces when it comes to poc opinions so imma just stay anonymous if that's ok with u.

i came across a post you posted a while ago regarding the if ROs and the lack of diverse characters when it comes to darker skin characters and i just wanted to say thank u for making that post. i hope it gives writers and the fandom some food for thought. ive been noticing ever since i got into the if community that black/ros of black descent tend to almost always be the less popular ros and as a mixed black person myself it's really sad to see. you also mentioned the lack of darker skinned east Asians/south East Asians if i recall correctly (if not please feel free to correct me) and I honestly couldn't agree not. ive noticed in some ifs that the characters of color that are the most popular tend to be those of east Asian descent with paler skin or poc ROs who's ethnicity is left ambigious by the author and whilst I'm really happy that there's been more progress made in terms of diversity, i would love to see more black characters who aren't sidelined to the best friend stereotype and more poc characters who's ethnicity is made clearer.

some south east Asian friends of mine who are of Hmong-Thai and Agta-Filipino descent have also mentioned they would would love to see more South East Asian ROs as well as East Asian ROs who are darker skinned, because the majority of the rep that there seems to be for Asian characters are those with paler skin. its a similar feeling for Latinx ROs, i almost always see lighter skinned Latinx ROs being represented in the majority with a lack of darker skinned Latinx ros. I'm not forcing anyone to add diversity to their game ofc, but the ratio of poc ROs to white ros on some games have made me kind of sad to see, specially when there's like 4 or 5 white ros and then 2 ros of colors who seem like they were just kind of tacked on for representation points, but their backgrounds are left ambigious and no Nationality or ethnicity is ever mentioned by the author which kind of leaves me scratching my head ngl. there's also a prominent lack of SEA and SA rep in terms of ROs, so I'm always happy when I see one! I would also love to see more biracial characters who aren't half white, since we aren't all a monolith.

regarding black ros. in my time in the community whilst ive seen an increase in the amount of black ROs, seeing them always be the least popular in polls still makes me quite sad. i hope that fandom can become more open minded and give more black ROs a chance. on the other hand I've seen a lot of greatly written black ROs in comparison to back in the day, and I'm glad people are incorporating more ROs based on their culture which is great!

sorry about this essay, but i hope it doesn't come across as rude or offensive, it's just something that has been on my mind ever since ive seen your post regarding the lack of representation in if. English isn't my first language so I hope I expressed myself alright.

negl, when i the way you started and then the length of this post, i foreal thought it was gonna be a fight. so, it was a relief that isnt the case. i honestly don't think there's anything for me to add, because you said my feelings and all i could do is nod along as i read this.

though, i'm glad that my post struck a chord for you. (is that the thing to say?? i'm not even sure. i guess my purpose for that post was pointing out the ignored part and bringing on encouragement as well. so, while i'm glad it encouraged you to share your opinion and made you feel less alone in feeling uncomfortable with what you were seeing -- it sucks that things haven't changed to a point where you can feel comfortable saying your thoughts off anon without being harassed. like yikes [not at you, but at fandom]. roflmao. like this is 2023. we really STILL at a point where we're going to make people feel bad about having a GENERAL issue with the racism and colorism that if writers & the if fandom continue to show? rather than … idk continue to DO something about it.)

i would love to see more black characters who aren't sidelined to the best friend stereotype and more poc characters who's ethnicity is made clearer.

i have actually seen some improvement, too. either from the fandom directly zeroing in and supporting black characters (i know the polls can seem disheartening - and i had a feeling that's what drew you to my inbox - but there HAVE been moments where the black character would be the most favored ro -- buuuuuut .... sadly, it is still so rare that i continue to be surprised when it occurs) or in the if writers boosting black characters because they have an awareness regarding fandom's bias. i definitely do think we need more of the latter, tho.

i still think there is a very long way to go. extremely. like i think in general, despite the imporvements we have both observed, a lot of the newer games i've seen ratio is still low like you said. it's a mix instead of being - at least from my observation - as consistently majorly white like it used to be. now i'd say the ratio is aybe 3 (white characters) to 2 (characters of color, of different races) ... as opposed to 3:1. Whoo. BUT i've seen what you mentioned too, still -- too many games are still so white. And if they're not, they're more often than not theyll be light skinned East Asian or black (or mixed... with white). Or an ambigous Latino that I can't tell if they're a white Latine or meant to be a character of color. So, yeah ... i don't know what it is. a fear of writing characters of color, not finding characters of color romanceable, or just a lack of awareness.

Like I guess I agree with you (lmao), I don't want to "pressure" people to have diversity either --- mostly because the people who get hurt in cases like that are minorities reading the story. My desire, I suppose, is a want to understand. I know a lot of IF writers have the idea that 'my story is for me', and in a sense, I agree -- I think we shouldn't expect writers to bend every bit of story to the fans (not even an interactive story). I've seen the mess that can create. However, if you wanted it to be JUST your story, you would've left it in your journal. You want engagement and participation -- you want to share, and I believe most stories should be shared. So, why as an artis wouldn't you want to make a story where .... I don't know. I'm tired. I've kind of gotten to a point where I'm just like whatever. I'm disappointed in myself for expecting better from IF writers and the IF fandom.

BUT I am glad that you and your friends are not only discussing but EXPECTING better, because you deserve it. Because your friends deserve to see and engage with characters who are SEA (of all shades, but especially of darker skinned). You deserve to see mixed raced characters who aren't half white (or light skinned), because as stated yall arent a monolith -- that isn't all there is in the world. (And it's WEIRD to me, like WHY do we AUTOMATICALLY assume mixed/biracial = partially white? I mean I KNOW why but COME ON! lol.)

*sighs*

i WILL say though, again, it's not all bleak: and i have seen variation of the TYPE of characters of color -- like it isn't always the cold e. asian or the black emotional pack mule best friend. so that's good. and i hope that continues.

and you're fine, dove. i actually appreciate your ask because like i said i was feeling kinda ho-hum about things but this sorta sparked a fire in me, roflmao. you expresse yourself just fine, and honestly despite the essay i wrote back i really didnt have anything worth adding.

[palettepainter]

So I don’t usually make posts about anon hate, I’m pretty good at laughing it off and the only one issue I can think about that I couldn’t laugh off was when I left the Zoophobia fandom and an anon (might have been one person could have been multiple, but I suspect it was just the one) was using depression as a form to guilt trip me. As someone who knows two people with depression, I did not and will never find this funny or acceptable. 

That being said this morning I woke up to an anonymous ask, I have since deleted the ask but I do want to address it.

I made this post a few days ago talking about the Hazbin pilot, and asking people if their interest in the show had changed since it came out - https://palettepainter.tumblr.com/post/706536540205154304/keep-it-civil-to-my-hazbin-followers-has-your#notes

I actually got some replies to this, both on Tumblr and Twitter, and everyone was very civil and when I sent my replies back to them to talk about the show, none of them got weird of hateful towards my opinions - then I woke up this morning to an anonymous ask saying this: “Hazbin fans: Haha, I’m in danger”

There was more to the ask but honestly my brain just kinda blocked the rest of it out, I registered it as hate I didn’t want to deal with so I just deleted it. Let me be clear: I do not hate Hazbin. I never said in the post that I hated Hazbin, go back and read it if you have to. The only thing I said in that post that I didn’t like was the writing in Helluva Boss and a few of the Hazbin redesigns. That’s it. I even stretch to say I hate the redesigns, I’m just not a big fan of most cuz they haven’t changed a lot so there’s nothing to go into a big whoop about. I’d say the one I dislike the most is Adam, that’s all. His design so far is the only one I really have a small issue with. The Hazbin fandom has been running on fan content for three years since the pilot came out, which I and others understand since the crew and Viv herself are limited in what they can and can’t say about the show, but it’s the same deal with Zoophobia. Zoophobia was running on fan content for YEARS and that was why my interest started to waver in the first place, we’ve had no real character information from the team. We’ve had redesigns yes, but that’s it, pictures you can look at for a second. Can you honestly - if you get off your high horse for just a second - say that all of the Hazbin fandom would have the same intense love for this show after three years of no animation? ALL the hazbin fans? 

I like having anonymous asks open, I want to give anyone who wants to ask me a question or send in a headcannon or whatever the opportunity too. I enjoy answering your questions, and yes while I know having anonymous asks open is a two way deal situation where you can’t have the kind asks without running the risk of getting some petty hate every now and then, here’s the main problem here. It is NOT the fact that I’ve received hate that’s the issue here, there’s always gonna be somebody that want’s to feel clever and send in a hate ask just to feel something, my issue is what the anon said. 

Saying stuff like that, thinking you’re being funny or trying to crack a joke, just makes me not want to draw for Hazbin.

I actually have many character bio’s scripted out in my Google Docs for NG redesigns and I even have a completed doodle of Iridescence’s new look in my folders - I shared an old WIP of her redesign to my Patreon a while ago - I was looking forward to sharing this work, and now I don’t want to share it. 

It was asks like these that made me glad I left the Zoophobia fandom in the first place, because the moment I said I was leaving I got more hate then I ever have from any fandom. I have gotten zero hate - ZERO - from the MHA fandom, a fandom that is famous for defending ships till their last breaths. That same fandom that sent death threats to the literal creator of the manga if he didn’t make their ships cannon (which we can all agree I don’t need to make a post about for people to understand why this is a massive step over the line). Zero hate. I’ve had some weird asks, but zero hate. Nothing at all.

If the anon is reading this - I’m pretty sure you are since I’ve got a suspicion you’re the same hater that keeps sending in asks like this - while it is very charming you’re spending precious seconds stewing over what I do and don’t draw, if you sent in that ask hoping it would guilt me into drawing for Hazbin, you’ve only made me not want to post stuff for the fandom.

So to my nice Hazbin followers who I do appreciate, blame this anon for no Hazbin content

[shdwtouch]

i like that you are always such a loving presence on the dash <3 i don't have much love to give, myself (i rarely feel love), and i feel awkward receiving it as well, so i prefer to send compliments on anon because i don't. i don't want the attention. i don't want people to see me as someone who is loving, because i'm not, and i get worried people will then expect it of me. anyway ignore this if you want no worries at all, but i do want to say it's nice to see someone with so much genuine love to give. <3

( as a note / for context, I received this the other night when I responded to the first unpopular opinion ask ! and as a note to anon, if you see this, I have included a response to your second ask under the cut <3 )

daw, thank you !! ; w ; I do try. like, I really do. I just. live by the resolve that I would never want people to feel like I have. I've felt... really low. been in really dark places, especially while in the roleplay community. and I honestly wouldn't wish that on anyone. everyone deserves love, support, and kindness. everyone deserves to feel seen and valid and wanted. it's... kind of awkward sometimes, honestly, but knowing that people see what I say and feel its intent makes it all worthwhile ! I try to be as accommodating and open-minded and, well, empathetic as I can. to say things I think people need to hear / see, and with the hope that my saying anything at all has helped another person say it, or not need to say it all. <3

as for you, I think that is valid ! and part of why I feel embarrassed sometimes, because I know that my flavor of love and support isn't one that everyone will enjoy. but I think that what you do is fair. and... to be completely honest. I think you situation is incredibly special. to rarely feel love but having the inkling to voice it anyway for the benefit of others... that is the sweetest thing I can think of. true, selfless love. because you aren't giving it because you expect anything in return, or because you want people to see you as a loving person... but because it is needed, or wanted. that is. incredibly wholesome, and you have my respect. just know that your kindness and love, even if anonymous, is valued and appreciated.

on the flipside, to know someone doesn't love or show kindness easily... but receive it from them ? that is truly special. intimate, even. and I hope the people around you know how incredibly special your care is, for that reason. (also, I don't meant to burst your bubble, and granted this is based on your anons alone, but... I would say you are a fairly loving and kind individual. I think the people around you would understand your position / situation and be immensely touched by the love you show them in spite of it. but I also understand your fears of it becoming expected, so I'm not judging you. it can be... exhausting when your love is expected by someone, even if offered freely. and I can definitely empathize with that anxiety on days I don't feel very supportive or don't have the spoons to offer the level of support I usually do.)

at any rate, I do appreciate your message. thank you, anon. ; w ; you have made me feel very valid and worthwhile in my efforts. <3

no no no ! that post had nothing to do with your message, I promise. I actually had a conversation with someone (that wasn't even really related to the post, tbh) that made me realize the post might have inspired insecurity in those who had read it, and I wanted to address that because I definitely didn't want anyone to feel bad for not sending positivity. I also realized after rereading the post that I had taken a very personal stance, and that might have implied a failure or fault in the part of my writing partners, which wasn't true. I think it can often be said we complain about what we lack before we first consider what we already possess.

and I don't want you to feel bad either ! that was not my intention. see what I have written above heheh I have a lot of respect for you and the love you show despite a lack of social energy, and I greatly appreciate you sending these messages, truly. <3

[everything-is-crab]

Sometimes upper caste marxist women in our country are just pathetic. I follow this person on facebook who frequently posts mra rhetoric but adds "bourgeois" prefix to women to appear progressive. And it's honestly so disappointing because she makes otherwise good analysis on class. But when it comes to women's rights, all they do is cater to misogynistic leftist men for social media clout. I get annoyed at feminist spaces for disregarding caste or class and then see this from marxist women.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=pfbid028dyBEvs7UdDhVKmwqDoEHAzDq3MUDKVdh7oDqH5qc8caAcsvn4N36n49ktvHfmCsl&id=100000560346594&mibextid=Nif5oz

She's straight up reblogging from a men's rights activist. I'd hoped a leftist woman would be better than this.

Also, I am so glad I found your blog. You're really a genuine person and your posts are always so intelligent and well put. Thank you so much💕

😭😭 anon no offense but please don't send me links anonymously. For security reasons, I don't open them. Usually I don't complain cause people have sent me only Tumblr links until now and I just find the blog and the post directly instead of opening the link. But 1) You can't do that with facebook. 2) I don't have a facebook account anyways 💀💀

But you could still tell me in another ask what kind of exact MRA rhetoric she's spreading wrapped in Marxist language if you want.

And well even though I personally haven't come across any such upper caste Marxist woman (because I hardly come across Marxist women here in general), it's not surprising.

Look I appreciate the Marxist movement here. But sometimes some Marxists are right wing deviants. A lot of them are not just sexist but casteist as well. I wouldn't necessarily say they're "casteist" but they do ignore the distinction between caste and class and that opposing capitalist system by itself is not going to help us.

I have found it better to read a bunch of different texts with different opinions and come to my own conclusion. I have never found a perfect text regarding caste, class and gender. And you won't either. Sexist Marxists and Dalit activists, casteist Marxists and feminists.....it will never end.

It's a mess. I hardly come across intersectional analysis and the ones I come across are very faux. I once came across this one male university student writing a short text on gender caste and class and there was nothing unique about it except for one thing- he said opposing sex work is casteist and sexist 😭😭

The argument being cause it is mostly Dalit women pushed into prostitution and hence attaching stigma to it. And while I do agree there's stigma against women in prostitution and women from oppressed castes are seen as sexually deviant which together make it very hard for Dalit women in prostitution, one can't expect us to just let it go on. Do you see people arguing against the abolition of manual scavenging? No. Then why should women from oppressed castes be expected to not just continue being exploited but embrace it? Nobody dares to ask Dalit men do that. So why should women be confined to roles society historically forced upon us? It's not empowering. Little girls from oppressed castes and poor backgrounds are forced to give up their education and join prostitution. And I am just supposed to accept that and to make things balanced expect women from upper castes to join them? Fuck off. Men are the worst lol

The best we can do is make wide like-minded connections around us as much as possible. I feel like, until our economic issues are resolved, we will not progress further in social issues.

Women make most of the poor here. How will they be able to talk about abolition when it's hard for them to achieve even reform? No amount of activism or NGOs is going to work as long as there is corruption.

Btw there's a lot of Dalit feminist theory around. But they're written by many upper caste women instead like Uma Chakravarti, Sharmila Rege. Dalit feminist writers exist. Bama, Urmilla Pawar and all. But they prefer to write fictional literature or biographies instead of your theory. And in their own language rather than English. So you will have to dig deeper for the translated texts. But I do recommend reading them even if fiction and biographies bore you. Only those texts have given justice to describing what it means to be a woman from an oppressed caste experiencing both male and upper caste arrogance.

And also do read Tithi Bhattacharya's books and interviews if you feel discouraged by coming across right wing bigotry even in feminist or Marxist spaces. While she's upper caste, she's very prominent and is a Marxist who's a feminist,anti casteist and anti nationalist and also doesn't bootlick colonial era. However, I don't fully agree with her views on imperialism. What she describes related to imperialism in the global south is true but very basic....I don't think many people really understand US imperialism....it's not just about the IMF or World Bank. Even though they're equally evil. It's the whole US dollar hegemony and the way it is backed by their military. And also opposing any left wing government in the GS and everything. But that is a whole another topic. Sorry for getting a bit off track but my point is.....there will be dissent and while I understand not accepting MRA rhetoric which is just blatant sexism, remember you won't find any person you will agree with 100%. Just read and form your own thoughts. You may be wrong but still.

[cherrykindness]

wild tweets |

pairing: Harry Styles x Actress!Reader

summary: as newlyweds, you and harry read thirsty comments for buzzfeed.

warning: it's thirsty tweets, so below there is adult humor 😳

"It's a bright, sunny morning in Los Angeles, and there's nothing I want more than to be on BuzzFeed and read wild tweets alongside my husband."

"Thirsty tweets, babe." Harry corrected, laughing out loud with the producers behind the cameras.

"Thirsty Tweets." You said quickly, putting your hand over your mouth to stifle a giggle. "I'm terrible at that, I'm sorry. Can we start over?"

"Let's take a break for one to two minutes. You've given us a great introduction, Y/N."

You shook your head, smiling shyly before turning to Harry, who was already watching you with that easy smile at the corner of his lips. You liked how his hand remained firmly on yours, making those circular movements with the thumb that always served as a natural medice for your anxiety.

"You look so fucking beautiful."

The pleated dress with flounce sleeves fit you like a glove. You had made peace with the various shades of white since the wedding and knew that Harry liked to see you in that color too.

"Thank you, you're not too bad either, Styles."

You intimately suspected that Harry would always seem far beyond that "not bad" that came out as a euphemism from your mouth. He wore nothing but a pair of bell-bottom pants in a strong shade of blue and a soft vest printed with fluffy little sheep on a striped American collared shirt - in your opinion, no one could look better in farm animal clothing than Harry Styles and Princess Diana with her red "Black Sheep" sweater in the 1980s. In contrast, you knew your husband well enough to know that he was arrogant and knew exactly how hot he looked - you also made your thoughts clear enough when you kept him backstage beyond ten minutes in a rather heated kissing session.

"Are you anxious?" you asked curiously, remaining with downcast eyes fixed on the strokes that remained assiduous on your warm skin. "To read about how the whole internet dreams of fucking my wife?! Of course." Harry joked, leaning over to leave a small one on your cheek. "We agree on that, don't we? Although I'm a little nervous, I'm really interested to know all the crazy things they say about you. Everyone knows you're mine at the end of the day, that's enough."

At the end of the break, you and Harry made a silent agreement that you should be the first to pick up one of the scattered papers in the red pot. There were quite a significant amount of tweets, and as much as you were used to reading rather sordid things about your husband on the Internet, the excitement was there as if you were wading into uncharted territory.

"I would be a good girl all year round if Santa guaranteed me a threesome with Harry and Y/N Styles on Christmas Eve." You laughed, Harry staring at the camera with an expression close to the meme of the surprised Pikachu. "You guys are incredibly nasty, I love it."

"If that was the first one, I'm really worried about the next ones." Harry commented with a little corner smile, picking the next tweet out of the bucket. "I have an entire folder on Pinterest dedicated to Harry Styles' hands, and let me tell you why: those hands are art, and art needs to be recognized."

"What- Guys, you promised you wouldn't post my anonymous tweets here." You quipped with false reproach, laughing at your own stupid joke while everyone else in the studio did the same. "But I can't blame her, honestly." Shaking your shoulders, you opened another piece of paper. "Harry Styles finally confessed that he wrote Watermelon Sugar for Y/N!!!! Are you guys imagining the same thing as me?!!!!!! 🥵🍆💦"

"Exhausted emoji, eggplant emoji, and water emoji?" Harry frowned, staring at the tweet you held up. "I imagine you're in need of a vacation somewhere refreshing and you're craving a fruit that everyone eats like it's really a vegetable."

"That reminded me of that story-" You laughed, hiding your face on the table as Harry continued to offer a poker face to the camera, struggling not to keep up with you laughter. "I'm sorry, lovie, I have to share this with the rest of the world." You stated, wiping a few tears from the corner of your eyes. "Harry always wears those fancy suits to concerts, right?! Right! Turns out he looks really hot in some, like his ass molds perfectly into those tight pants and everything. I was home that night because I wasn't feeling well enough to face the big crowds, but I was still following everything on twitter. It was a concert in London, not so far from where we lived at the time, so it was obvious that he would come home after it was over. I follow some portals that do really fast updates of pictures, videos, etc; everything that happened at Harry's concert was on my timeline in a matter of seconds. When one of these profiles uploaded a picture of him with his back to the camera in a heavily accentuated black and white suit, I quickly sent him the image along with a peach emoji and then wrote "looks good tonight". He didn't reply to me until a few hours later, of course, but I obviously didn't expect a "ready for a Fifth Avenue peach salad for dinner?" and numerous cutlery emojis."

Harry rolled his eyes comically, indulging in laughter as did everyone else who occupied the backstage area.

"I'm against the eroticization of emojis." He said between uncompensated breaths, shaking his head negatively. "Let's go to the next ones, please, I'm already feeling exposed enough here."

"I like your old-fashioned spirit, baby." You assured him with a smile, laying on the sturdy shoulder hidden under the fluffy fabric.

Harry chuckled low, leaving a little kiss on the top of your head before selecting the next paper. The fans would die when that video aired, everyone was sure. You two easily forgot the cameras when you were side by side, and the public display of affection had never been a problem.

"My life mission is to look at someone the way Harry looks at Y/N and be reciprocated the way Y/N looks at Harry, then I could die happy." Harry read. "That was very good and healthy, thank you!" He smiled. "But don't settle for death in that case, please. Just make sure to keep that person around forever."

"Awn, we got so sweet now." You made a pout. "Thank you for sending us something so cute! I really hope you find the right person soon." Sending a kiss to the camera, you moved on to the next tweet. "I wouldn't want to get a golden ticket to visit Willy Wonka's factory, I would like to get a golden ticket to actively participate in Y/N and Harry Styles' Honeymoon.

"That was creative, so I will disregard the fact that you removed my last name from my wife's name." Harry joked.

"I will always be an Y/L/N." You flashed the tongue. "We had a great Honeymoon, but I know you guys already know all about it because there are pictures all over the internet of outings that I don't even remember existed."

"Even though we chose a rather reserved city, many paparazzi still managed to photograph some of our nights there." Harry agreed. "There was one particular day when we opted to have dinner at a restaurant near the beach. Y/N had found it even before the trip, it was pretty laid back and we could spend the evening at karaoke. I don't really remember what happened, but we woke up the next day with a terrible hangover, still wearing the clothes from the dinner and with several headlines saying that I was cheating on my wife in the middle of our Honeymoon with a blue-haired italian girl."

"That wig made me sexy, man." You blinked, laughing as you remembered the situation. "It's a shame the paparazzi only got low quality images, but I swear I looked really amazing that night. Italy, I miss you."

"We're coming to the end and I haven't had to ask production for a glass of water yet, thank you to whoever selected these tweets." Harry raised his thumb to the camera, smiling before turning his gaze back to the small paper he had chosen. "Y/N could literally punch me in the face and I would just bow down and thank them for it." He laughed. "She has heavy hands, so I would rethink that choice."

"It takes strong hands to be a superheroine." You blinked gracefully, referring to your works as a Marvel actress. "I move around a lot during the night, so I'll take this lovely opportunity to say that twitter can dismiss all the malicious theories about Harry always show up with a new bruise all over his body."

"Please stop making indecent assumptions while Y/N is aggressive with me at night only unconsciously, her father has access to social media."

You laughed, clearing your throat before reading the next obscenity aloud.

"I would sell all my possessions to have Y/N sitting on my lap for ten seconds."

"Oh my God." Harry laughed out loud, throwing his head back. "I should have said that in our wedding vows."

You shook your head, laughing low as you set the tweet aside.

"That was pretty funny and cheeky, I approve."

"Okay, looks like we finally got to the last one." Harry announced, waving the paper in the air dramatically before opening it. "Harry could literally crush me with those boots while fuc- I need that glass of water." He said dumbfounded, hiding his face between his hands after throwing the tweet over his shoulder. You laughed out loud next to the organizers, and meanwhile Harry leaned his head on your bust, staring at you still with wide eyes. "Please promise that we will be careful with our future children on the internet."

[youreyeslookliketheocean]

youreyeslookliketheocean’s DSMP Fic Recs!!

Figured it was about time for one of these... :)

Mostly SBI-centric because they’re my favorite dynamic. I’ll probably add to this list as time goes on, and I also want to go back through my ao3 history and find some lesser-known fics I really enjoyed to rec them all. But for now...

* oneshot  ** unfinished work

** the lights go out (my heart goes still) by curseworm

With his old home unwelcoming and his new one gone, Tommy is alone. After hours of staggering through the freezing snow, he finds a cabin.

Technoblade’s cabin.

He hides himself away in the deepest corner he can find, taking only what he needs to survive, wasting away in the cold and the dark. He’s petrified at the thought of being found out, terrified of what he thinks Techno would do to him.

When Techno finds his injured teenage brother huddled in a filthy little cave beneath his basement, the rage he feels is immeasurable. The voices demand blood, and blood he will give them. Dream won’t be getting away with this one.

(On the other side of the world, in a country that floats on a man-made lake, Philza gets himself in a bit of a pickle.) 

** The hearth down under by Crystalquill

A tiny change gives Tommy the courage to flee to the Nether instead of the cold tundra, finding an unlikely ally in the midst of a fiery hellscape.

But tiny changes can alter the course of history. The SMP will never be the same.

(Lots of cool Nether worldbuilding in this one!!)

to be a wanderer, wandering by hydrangeasheart

Tommy's feet drag in the snow.

It's so, so cold. He's so cold. His toes are freezing. His exposed shins feel like they’ve been cut open-- even the one that’s bandaged. His wings have gone numb, which is almost, almost good, because now he can’t feel the shifting, broken bones inside of the left one, just under feathers and muscle.

He doesn’t know why he’s still walking.

-

Or, Tommy leaves the exploded ruins of Logstedshire behind, and walks until he finds somewhere safe.

And things keep going from there.

(A canon-divergent AU, splitting off somewhere around when Tommy started hiding out below Techno's house.)

that’s, like, a hundred miles by No_one_you_know (and then “as long as i’m here”, and “he’s my brother, i just raise him”)

Dream would kill him. Dream was going to kill him- he was going to- no, he wouldn’t. Dream was his friend- friends don’t hit each other- Dream was supposed to take care of him- Dream /was/ taking care of him.

It hurt to breathe. It hurt to think. He couldn’t clear his thoughts as he stumbled to the family computer, pulling up a tab on google and frantically typing the name into the search bar.

The words Technoblade Watson stared back at him, the little black bar at the end of the letters blinking slowly, mocking him.

Why, of all people, did it have to be Technoblade?

in short: the one where dream sucks as a parental figure, tommy runs away, and visits his least favorite family member technoblade.

passerine by thcscus(blujamas)

Do I really need to put the summary here? Pretty much everyone knows this fic. Also, though, if you enjoy this one you should totally read thcscus’ connected fic, “shrike”!! It’s only at 2 chapters right now but it’s already really good and has this dark, foresty aesthetic I love...

not with a bang but with a whimper by dip_dyed_ghost

He knows Tubbo doesn’t care about him anymore. He knows that. He’s been shown that. But it doesn’t stop Tommy from caring about him. He brushes the pads of his fingers over the compass’s glass and wonders how he’s doing, if he’s tired of it all yet, if he needs help. He watches the way it points strongly in the direction over the ocean. He hopes he’s alright.

Even after everything, he hopes he’s alright.

During his exile, Tommy finds a drugged and hurt Tubbo on his doorstep. He can’t not help him.  

(This one has a neat take on potions, in my opinion. Also it’s only 4 chapters so it’s a quick read!)

take this compass, follow it home by lightning_anon

Tommy's a fuck up, he can't pay attention, and never sits still. He taps his hands, pushes people away, and has never had a best friend. He's a screwed up, forgotten kid lost in the foster system. He's also just been placed with a new family. Tommy knows how this goes, he never ends up staying long. After all, no one wants a fuck up like him.

Why would this house be any different?

Or: the obligatory sleepy bois foster fic, but with a focus on the neurodivergent kids that inevitably get lost in the system.

(Genuinely want to see more books like this in original fiction. It’s part of what inspired my newest og wip, “To Build a Home.” So sweet and I feel like I had my eyes opened to some neurodivergent tendencies I never knew existed. I read this in a day and can’t rec it enough.)

bloodlines by youreyeslookliketheocean

Tommy’s an orphan on the run from his previous guardian. Philza’s a king who prides himself on keeping his kingdom in an era of peace. Wilbur’s the crown prince, and Techno’s right beside him as his adopted brother. When Phil’s kingdom of Pogtopia is threatened by the bloodvines—a strange, brainwashing plant infecting many of the surrounding kingdoms—the four must work together to keep the kingdom, and their family, safe. --- A royal au sbi fic... + the bloodvines, for spice.

(Yes I’m self-promoting. But, in my defense, I’m very proud of it. If you checked it out it would mean the world to me :’))

Heat Waves by tbhyourelame

Dream has always held a gentle admiration for George, but when their nuanced friendship trickles into his sleeping mind, he awakens to a new world of conflicting emotions and longing. Lost in the midst of a heat wave, he continuously listens to a song that works itself in to the very core of his heartache. Floridian nights, unsent messages, spiraling infatuation, and terrible, terrible weather.

Another fic I think pretty much everyone knows about. Listen, listen... I was once an idiot who said “Oh no, I’ll never read Heat Waves. It’s irl, not characters, and it’s probably cringe”... No. I was so wrong. This fic is wonderfully written, with a pretty quick moving plot and great characterizations. You do need an ao3 account to access it, though. Just to let you know. (Also read “Helium”, unfinished and hasn’t updated in awhile, but it’s the continuation). 

Guitar Strings and Keyrings are What it Takes to Build a Home by Anonymous

Techno was adopted by Phil when he was 12 years old.

He'd been enjoying his morning before Phil came to him asking if he would mind them taking in another kid. Against his better judgement, Techno agrees and ends up with two new foster brothers who he was determined to not get attached to, no matter what.

Tommyinnit’s unbeatable method of avoiding sudden death by eneliii

“I uh,” Tommy starts, not knowing how to break this to the hero lightly. He hates to be the bearer of bad news. “I think your powers are broken? It’s not a bad thing of course, but like, I swear you tried to mind control me and it like, totally failed. Which is fine, honestly, don’t feel insecure. Everyone’s power stop working sometimes… I think.”

Sheesh, this is very awkward. Why is no one else talking? Why is Philza looking at him like he grew three heads? Why is the Blade staring at him so intensely? Why is Willow still frozen?

“Did I, did I hit a nerve? Yikes,” Tommy hisses, “Well um,” He steps back, bracing his legs and bending his knees, “This was like super fun, but I’m - I’mma head out.”

or,

in which Tommy manages to annoy the hell out of Phil, Techno and Wilbur by being both impossible to catch and irritatingly endearing.

or or,

a crack fic where Tommy is a vigilante and Phil, Techno and Wilbur are the heroes hunting him down.

(Feel like I am obligated to say how incredibly funny this fic is. Seriously. I have a distinct memory of sitting on my neighborhood park’s swing, giggling hysterically, while reading this. Well...until the end... but we won’t get into that...)

** bones in the ocean by bunflower

“Your reputation precedes you, y’know.”

“Does it, now?” Philza watches him coyly from where he’s now leaning against the wall, arms folded around his chains and gaze half-lidded, his lips curled in an arrogant, cat-like smirk.

“The Angel of Death, the ferryman of the Styx, the terror of the western seas. One of the most feared captains ever to sail, and yet, I have to wonder… how did a man like you end up all on his own? We searched the area where you were found—not another soul in sight. So,” He fixes him with a long look, allowing the silence to hover like a dark cloud, the words rolling off of his tongue with all the venom and smugness he can muster, “—tell me, Philza. Where is your crew?”

OR: Technoblade is a naval captain, and Phil his unwilling prisoner. Somehow, they manage to come out of it as friends in the end.

(Is this fic considered popular like passerine/Heat Waves now? Cause I feel like it’s reputation precedes itself, at this point... Pirate au.)

****

Okay! That’s it for now. Like I said, though, I want to add to this over time and also dig back for some older things I’ve read. Also, if you have any recs feel free to send them in! I’m about to go back to school and therefore might not have time for reading fun stuff, but whenever I get the chance I’d love to check them out!!!

Happy Reading!!

[bitter-sweet-coffee]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25046521/chapters/60661000

You know, I shouls've enjoyed this, because its content of my fave, Shadow, but now I'm just mad. Don't gemme wrong, I LOVE Infinite, but seeing him interact so romantically with Shadow... made my blood boil!!

I honestly feel like this would've worked MUCH better with an shadow x fem!reader. Fake marriage tropes are lit but having it be with Infinite is unrealistic? Because Shadow's straight (I know i date him regularly >//<)

Just imagine it!! Shadow's worried for reader-chan, ans when he tells her he loves her the staff thinks they're married and she gets to meet Sonic and Infinite can even be there!! Then everyone is happy. :)

Sorry, I'm just so disappointed in this fic. Shadow isn't ace or gay he's straight lol

hi anon! thank you for the review of my fic, i know i haven’t updated it in a while but i always enjoy people interacting with my works :)

i’m sorry you didn’t enjoy the fic because of the ship, but that’s why i tagged it as shadow/infinite! i’m not sure how often you use ao3, but anything with a / tag is a romantic ship. hopefully this will help you avoid things that genuinely upset you in the future because that is never the intention of any author.

you are absolutely 100% free to ship shadow with whoever you want (which includes yourself!) but that freedom of interpretation applies to everyone, including ships you may not like such as infinadow. i for one am personally not a fan of x reader fics because they require bland enough writing to make the reader character realistic for ANY reader, and i’m the type of person who likes little details hehehe

anyways, you are definitely 100% free to consume whatever content you want, but unfortunately it won’t come from me because we have different tastes and that’s okay!

one last thing: i’m not sure if you’re new to tumblr or are part of the twitter migration, but do be cautious about sending messages like this to people (anonymous and highly opinionated about fanworks). that’s not how we do it on tumblr, and you will very quickly get written off as a troll, get ignored, or get awfully strong responses from (rightfully) angry people. people make fanworks for free that are often deeply personal to them (like how you care about shipping yourself with shadow) and something like this is considered very rude and will upset a lot of people!

i personally don’t think you intended to be mean at all, and i’m not mad whatsoever since i try to take asks in good faith. you seem really sweet and passionate about your character interpretations! just try to be open minded about other people and their opinions too, okay? some of my besties and a lot of my mutuals on here have contradictory lore and opinions that rarely overlap with my own, but it’s never about “being right” since everyone has their own interpretations, which can all coexist.

if your fic pitch makes you that happy, i fully encourage you to try and write it yourself! even if it isn’t my cup of tea, i always support people in their writing endeavours and i’d love to see where you go with this :)

i am always happy to receive asks, so hopefully this won’t discourage you or anyone since that’s never my goal! people can always review my stuff, respond to my takes, and even pitch ideas like this one here. i might not personally create any of it myself, but i do enjoy seeing other people be happy and excited while gushing about something that means something to them 💕

[kodzuvii]

CLUB STUPID [24: yeah probably]

next [25: premarital hand holding]

PAIRING - SUNA x FEM!READER

GENRE - crack + fluff

warnings - spelling and grammar errors lol guys its 1am plz-

SYNOPSIS - Club Stupid, an anonymous podcast meant for the dumb and dumbest to send in unspoken and nonsensical thoughts about issues they face in their day to day lives and for Y/n to speak out and give her opinions and feelings. Normal feelings though, nothing romantic like how she thinks this lazy guy with questionable hair in the volleyball club is actually pretty cute.

a/n: as an executive member and proud representative of the suna simp club (jk lol idk) it is my duty, to keep my simps fed. you’re welcome. please listen to some cute wholesome shit. 

“Look at this Samu, Suna really his own breed, how does he manage to look more dead compared to how he usually looks”

“Well Tsumu, he ignored the same girl twice in the same week and also got confronted by her cousin who’s also his captain. Pretty sad if ya ask me”

The twins snickered to each other as they eyed the quiet middle blocker who stood by his locker. “Did you see his blocks today Tsumu? I was afraid I was gonna break his toothpick arms with my spikes” Osamu whispered but made it loud enough for Suna to hear. Atsumu nodded, “yeah Samu, totally lame if you ask me. Thank God Yn wasn’t watching him” he teased. “Oi,” Aran called out as he packed up his things on his back that was sitting on top of the benches inside of the boy’s change room. “Lay off of him will ya” he scolded but the pair shrugged and continued to change out of their practice clothes. 

“What’s even happening?” Akagi whispered and Riseki could only turn to him and mirror the same lost look on his face and give a clueless shrug. They both just sat back and watched the scene unfold in front of them. The twins were teasing and throwing indirect jabs and insults towards their middle blocker who looked as if he was going through an existential crisis with the dull look in his eyes. 

Suna was quiet, everyone knew that. Yet somehow in some way, everyone could feel his energy hit an all-time low. He still attended practice sure, but it was like practicing with a pole lamp. He just stood there and observed whatever was happening but even then, his mind was somewhere else. Of course, this didn’t go unnoticed by the coach who gave him an earful about the proper attitude to be having during their practices. Did he listen though? Nah. Listening to a lecture required too much effort. He was just tired and done for the day and the anxious and nervous feeling bubbling up inside of him wasn't helping either.

Suna was stupid. He knew that. His attention span outside of the court was never the biggest and his lack of energy never helped increase his intelligence. He was never the brightest in his class, and honestly, it never bothered him that he wasn’t. Everything he learned came through one ear and left the other. He retained the information for a test but simply forgot everything once it was over. He wasn’t the brightest, and it didn’t bother him not one bit.

What did bother him was his terrible habit of being oblivious towards other people’s feelings. Maybe it was due to his lack of energy or lack of interest, but he simply never put much effort into acknowledging how people felt. Yeah, he got vibes when people had on and off days, his teammates were the twins, you HAD to notice their mood swings and take necessary precautions. It just never occurred to him that more people could enter his bubble. A bubble that revolved around himself.

However, instead of someone finding a way to enter his fragile bubble without popping it, Suna willingly left his bubble when you came into the picture. It was no secret that Suna was whipped the moment his eyes laid on you. He’s been getting clowned about it ever since the twins found out and they never let a day go by without calling him a simp.

He had no clue what type of person you would be when you entered the doors of the Shiratorizawa gym. You looked sweet and bubbly, the smile you came in with never left your face unless you’d whine to your friends or roll your eyes at them. When you stepped into the room, people just naturally gravitated towards your positive energy and your good vibe. He liked that about you. Then again he still didn’t know anything about you at the time. All he knew was that you managed to attract his attention without even directly giving any to him. Every time he tried to look away and focus on whatever was happening in front of him, his eyes trailed back to you.

For a while after camp, you kept popping back in and out of his mind. It was quite ridiculous actually. He’d be taking a drink by the water fountains and he’d look over to the hallway and suddenly the first thoughts would be ‘what if I saw the redhead again?’ It never lasted long, maybe for a split second or two before he snapped himself out of it. He’d never see you again, what was he talking about? He was just being delusional.

So you could imagine the way his mind stopped functioning the night at the train station. Suna had to pinch himself 8 times when he saw you walk out of the train doors. ‘No way’ he thought. You, out of the 7 billion people in the world, was Kita’s cousin. He remembers seeing your tired face and your short stature clad in a big hoodie and loose sweatpants with your hair tied up. You were supposed to look like a mess, why did he keep thinking that you looked so pretty? This must’ve been the higher power playing a trick on him for slacking off during practice. So annoying.

Suna could keep his cool around school. You weren’t in the same classes meaning he didn’t see you at all. So you could imagine the kind of panic that crossed his mind when Kita told the team that he’d have his cousin staying in the gym. He learned later on that you started watching practices because Kita didn’t feel comfortable with you walking home. You were nice to the team, incredibly nice actually. Your easy-going nature made it easy for you to have a couple of conversations with his teammates here and there. While you were nice to Aran and Akagi, you had a little feisty attitude with the twins (mainly Atsumu) and he couldn’t help but admire how outspoken you were. You were blunt, to say the least. That was something you and Kita had in common. But he liked that about you, how you were always free to speak whatever was on your mind and keep a conversation going. 

Suna noticed early on that you rarely paid attention to their practice. He figured volleyball just wasn’t your thing and he couldn’t blame you for that. During water breaks, he’d glance up and watch you tuck back your hair and sometimes he’d catch you scratching your temple in annoyance because of some question you couldn’t answer on your homework. You never looked up, simply unphased by whatever was happening in front of you. 

Even so, he still put the smallest amount of extra effort into his practices. Jumping a bit higher and running a bit faster and spiking the ball with more force. He insisted that it was about time he would break some of his bad habits, but even the team knew that it was a sorry excuse. Truth be told, a little part of him was just hoping that if you ever looked up from your phone or your work in your lap, you’d see him and think that he looked at least a little bit cool. 

One day, on the rare occasion that he’d be listening in class, he remembers his teacher having a discussion with the class about an epiphany. 

The feeling of a sudden or striking realization that hits an individual out of nowhere.

It was late at night where Suna hit an epiphany. You were off to Miyagi, spending your weekend with your best friend and the Twins continued to bug him about his little first-year crush even though he had asked them multiple times to drop the topic. 

Suna came to the conclusion that he liked the way you made him feel. He liked the way he felt at ease when you were around him. He liked how you were so different compared to him, but it never stopped you from forming a friendship with him. You never pushed him to ever open up to you, you listened to the bare minimum he had to say and never took his lazy nature and blunt attitude to heart. He liked annoying you, the way your face would scrunch up when he’d take your bento’s the first couple times during your first initial lunch hangouts or the way you’d puff your cheeks when he comments on your height. He liked the way your eyes lit up when the smallest things caught your attention. He took notes on the songs you said you were currently listening too or the ones that reminded you about happy memories. 

Suna especially liked seeing you smile. Especially towards him. Something about it gave him the same feeling that was comparable to the way he would feel when he would see those jelly sticks on sale at the grocery store. The way you’d roll your eyes in playful annoyance when he'd come up to you and ask to bandage his fingers even though you both knew that he was capable of doing it himself. You would tease him, a playful smile gracing upon your lips, telling him that his fingers would probably break off if you weren’t there to bandage them up. Suna liked thinking that having you wrap them up made his hands feel a bit stronger with his blocks. But you didn’t need to know that.

He remembers a specific memory that lives rent-free in his mind. He was walking down the hallway, casually strolling and taking his time to get back to class after using the bathroom and he happened to notice you heaving a tired sigh as you closed the doors to your class. You looked quite frustrated, probably because it was your art class and you had been complaining days earlier about how creatively drained you were.

 Suna must’ve been looking at you for a moment too long because the moment your eyes met, he felt something tug at his chest by the way your eyes sparkled at the sight of him. Despite being under a little bit of stress, the same smile he grew to enjoy seeing made its way onto your lips and you waved to him excitedly before running up and rambling off about how much your class was pissing you off.

You two eventually got in trouble for skipping the whole period after being too caught up in your conversation. Suna thought it was worth it though.

After scrolling through his phone, listening to Atsumu’s obnoxious lovey-dovey playlist, and inevitably searching “how to know if you like or like like a girl” (there's a difference, he swears) on google. 

He came to his epiphany.

 Maybe before, when he barely knew you and you never knew him, maybe he was just infatuated with the idea of you. 

But it was different now, He liked you.

And that scared him.

It scared him how vulnerable he felt. Suna’s reserved and quiet nature gave him a hard time to open to others. Not that he really cared if he was being honest. He simply had the mindset that no one needed to know everything there was to his existence. Everyone eventually leaves anyways, what was the point?

When it sank into him that he liked you, it confused him endlessly. You never wanted to get out of his head and sooner or later he found himself doing the smallest things for you. The little black silk band was always on his wrist and if it wasn’t on his wrist, it would be tucked away in his pockets. Not to mention that he kept one in his pencil case for good measure. The bandaids inside in his backpack were sealed away in a ziplock bag just in case you ever got hurt because he knew you were a bit clumsy. He found himself keeping his eyes open for little souvenirs and trinkets that looked like something that you’d like wherever he went. 

At first, he thought that he just wanted to upgrade you from friend to best friend. Maybe this was a friendship that he had just been deprived of since his world revolved around constantly meaning to improve in volleyball. Yes, he did find comfort in the friendship he grew with you, but sooner or later he realized that he wanted more. The thoughts of holding your hand slipped into his mind and sooner or later hugging you from behind and resting his head on top yours flowed in followed by taking you back by peppering your smooth and soft cheeks with kisses. That wasn’t something that best friends did.

Kita was right about how his logic of ignoring you to suppress his feelings was stupid and that the worst things that could happen were that he’d get rejected. But he didn’t want to face the chance of him getting rejected, he’d like you for so long and he learned during his time spent away from you that he didn’t want to just stop talking to you. Suna knew himself, if he got rejected then he’d distance himself away from you and never talk to you ever again because the embarrassment would eat him up. 

He didn’t wanna lose you for that. He wasn’t ready. 

What a coward. 

He just really hoped you liked the flowers and read his note, he thought anything was better than a stupid “I’m sorry” text.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

“Hurry up, I need to lock up the gym” Kita’s voice echoed throughout the walls as he stepped into the changeroom. Suna looked up from his phone, taking one last glance at your ‘see you soon :P’ text before shutting it off and shoving it into his pockets. As everyone began to leave one-by-one and bid their goodbyes to each other and their captain. The twins however didn’t leave until they both gave Suna a teasing punch on both of his shoulders. Suna only glared at them before proceeding to make his exit as well. 

Kita stopped Suna before he could exit and the look on his face seemed rather serious. With his voice low, Kita simply said “She needs to be back by 7. If she comes home hurt in any way, I’m benching you” he said sternly and that was enough for him to feel his skin crawl under his tracksuit jacket. Suna nodded, understanding that he really wasn’t kidding and that he definitely bench him. 

Kita turned around and opened the door for them both to leave the changerooms. They walked together side-by-side and from a distance, he could see your short figure walking up to both of them. You looked different today, your hair was sitting on your shoulders and a pair of gold-rimmed glasses he was yet to see was sitting on the bridge of your nose. You were clad in your uniform with an oversized pink knit cardigan overtop. Was that a new cardigan you were wearing? He’s never seen it before either. 

Kita smiled at the sight of you skipping up to them and he watched you two exchange high fives and he gave you a brief little speech about staying late. You nodded along and Suna stood by and watched Kita ruffle your hair making you whine cutely. 

He wanted to do that.

You waved goodbye to your cousin and Kita looked at Suna and gave him a firm nod before turning back and making his way towards the gym doors. You turned back and faced Suna, your hands behind your back as you made your way towards him with a warm smile. “Hey there” you greeted and stood in front of him, looking up so you could look at him clearly. Suna couldn’t help but look at you weirdly, why were you acting as nothing happened? Shouldn’t you be upset with him? “Hi, let’s go?” god, why was he so forward. 

You hummed and shook your head, making him furrow his eyebrows in confusion, “do you not wanna go anymore? I can drop you off if you want-” You rolled your eyes, “I don’t see you for a week and you’re already trying to get rid of me?” you questioned and narrowed your eyes at him. Suna felt his heart wrench as your lips pouted. 

He shook his head, “n-no” he stuttered. Your eyes perked up and you watch his cheeks heat up (potentially from embarrassment, but you're not going to assume) and look away. 

You chuckled and grabbed his wrist and pulled him to follow behind you. What made you so bold today? Probably from the unexpected pep talk you had with Goshiki that morning.

“You don’t need him Ln-senpai! If he thinks he can just look over you and all your greatness and beauty and not acknowledge how beautiful you are and how your very presence graces this dull world then send his ass to KFC! You are a woman senpai! A beautiful woman who deserves everything. Not a value menu that has a 20% off discount!”

Did his speech make sense? Sure. You’ll take it over Tendou’s “cut his dick off if he does you dirty queen” text message sent with the confetti effect on imessage followed by a bunch of knife emojis that was honestly more threatening rather than comforting.

You pulled him out of the gym and Shin gave you a look before shaking it off and locking up the gym doors. From the corner of your eyes, you could see the twins sending winks your way before snickering and walking off. You rolled your eyes and stopped when you reached the doors of the school. 

You turned around and faced Suna who looked very lost and confused. “Let’s not go to the convenience store today, let’s go somewhere else,” you say. Suna nodded slowly, “okay? Where do you wanna go?” he asked.

Just then, you lifted up your other hand and it was only then that Suna noticed you carrying a small pink lunch tote. You let go of his wrist and tucked some strands your hair behind you ear, “we haven’t had lunch together in a week and you had a meeting today again so we couldn’t do anything today either and well..” you trailed off and looked up at him and shrugged, “I figured we could make up for lost time” you muttered. 

Suna felt his chest tighten, not only because you were absolutely adorable and it was making him lose his mind, but it almost seemed like you were the one trying to apologize to him when you didn’t do anything wrong. He did.

You frowned as you looked at how subtly his face dropped. As upset as you were, you understood that he wasn’t ready to tell you whatever he was meaning to hide. He wasn’t obligated to tell you anything and you understand that. A small smile creeping up on your lips, “let’s go eat at the park near my house. The one we walk by all the time. Saves you the trouble of worrying if you’re gonna get home on time or not” you laughed slightly.

Suna couldn’t say no to you, so here were the two of you now. Eating and sitting in front of the other with the bento’s you had prepared on the table. The park was as busy as it usually would be during the afternoon. The atmosphere felt warm as the sky was slowly settling into hues of orange with peaks of pink seeping through. Suna watched you happily eat the bento you had prepared and listened attentively as you told him about everything he missed during your week and you did the same when he talked about his. 

A part of him couldn’t help but admire how pretty you looked in front of him. Suna was lying when he told the twins that you were a 7. You were beyond a 7 and beyond whatever scale they had given him. It was a rare sight to see you with your glasses and partnered with that oversized pink cardigan? You were adorable. 

You tilted looked up from your food and stopped mid-sentence when you saw him just look at you with what seemed to be a fond look in his eyes. But you could’ve just been mistaken, maybe you need to have your prescription checked again. “Rin, what’s wrong?” you asked. At the sound of his name, Suna blinked snapped back into reality and was met with your concerned look. “W-what?” You chuckled, “you zoned out Rin, everything okay?” you asked.

Rin.

He liked the way his name rolled off your lips. 

He shook his head, “I’m fine, sorry. This is really good by the way, I didn’t think you could cook” he said as an attempt to change the subject. You rolled your eyes but you looked away. “As much as I want you to believe I’m some great chef, Granny helped me with most of it” you confessed sheepishly. 

He chuckled and poked the sausage that was cut up into a little octopus with his chopsticks, “Well, you did tell me that you burned rice once so maybe I thought too highly of you to make a full meal” he teased. You scoffed and grabbed his bento, “if you’re not gonna appreciate the chef then you don’t deserve the food” you huffed. Suna rolled his eyes and grabbed yours, “guess I’ll have to eat yours then” he said and shoved some rice into his mouth. Your jaw dropped at his actions, “Hey!”

As the day went on, you both began to feel at ease and comfortable once again with each other's presence. The harmony that flowed around between you two was coming back and was settling into its familiar rhythm. You two continued to chat as if nothing happened. Laughing at anything and everything you found remotely hilarious under the sun. Suna felt warm. He was here, with you, and everything felt okay. With both your bento’s empty and tucked neatly away into your lunch bag and the sun settling down and giving a wake-up call for the stars to come out, it was about time for Suna to bring you home.

The walk back to your place was comfortable. There was no tension in the air or any awkwardness in the atmosphere. It was simply peaceful. You were walking beside him and rambling on about something that had happened to you in class that day. It was slightly cooler and the winds were colder and he had noticed early on that you kept pulling at the ends of your cardigan at an attempt to get some more warmth from it. It would’ve just been rude for him to let you be cold, Kita would kill him if you got sick.

It took you by surprise to see Suna slipping off his volleyball jacket and shoving it into your hands. He was wearing a hoodie under it anyway, he didn’t mind. A part of him was just curious about how his jacket would fit you too and what kind of fool would you be to reject an oversized jacket? It was just extra points that happened to be from the boy that you liked.

Suna nodded along to what you were saying, but he couldn’t help the sudden urge to just grab your hand out of his system. You were walking so close to each other. Your shoulders kept brushing past and your hands were right there. 

But with the events that happened this past weekend, he didn’t wanna overstep any boundaries. He was still too cautious that he would mess up and make you upset all over again. With the thought of his actions, Suna suddenly felt a little ball of guilt eat him up. He never stopped feeling bad about what he did. Kita’s words rang through his head, he needed to learn how to communicate better and not deal with everything all on his own. Maybe he really was a coward for letting such a dumb fear eat him up.

In the midst of your talk about how much you despise your math class, you turned to look at Suna and saw how troubled he looked. He didn’t even look like he was listening anymore and seemed to be having some sort of internal battle with himself. 

You furrowed your eyebrows and grabbed his wrist to stop walking. “Rin, what’s wrong?” you asked, concern lacing the tone of your voice. You both never really brought up what had happened. Maybe you were just too caught up in having a good time but you were honestly content with the reasons he gave you. If he wasn’t ready then he wasn’t ready. 

Suna however felt like he owed you so much more than his apology that he already struggled to explain. 

Suna stared down at you for a moment, the unreadable expression on his face that only made you more confused. It was quiet for a moment, the only sound to be heard was the wind blowing by and the trees rustling.

Nothing would have prepared you for the way he turned around and pulled the arm that was holding his wrist and pulling you into his chest. His hands wrapped around your shoulders as he held you just a little bit tighter. He was a bit stiff, but you couldn’t put that against. He wasn’t the type of person to initiate things like this.

“I’m sorry”

Your body froze, something about his tone was different. It was vulnerable.

You stayed quiet, letting yourself relax slowly in his hold.

“F-fuck, I’m really sorry. I said I wasn’t good with words right? S-so I’m trying to explain now because you deserve it but I don’t even know why I did it. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you upset at all, I was just caught up with myself and I didn’t consider what I was doing to you. You didn’t deserve that. I like being around you and I’m sorry” He pulled away and one of his hands dropped to your waist and fiddled with the material of his jacket. You watched as his free hand dug deep into his pockets and you watched him pull something out. 

“It’s kind of pathetic if you ask me and it’s also kind of ugly but-” he grabbed one of your arms and dropped the object into the palms of your hands. Your eyes widened at the little paper craft,

It was an origami strawberry.

It was small, it fit perfectly inside on the palms of your hand. You could see that he struggled with making it. The leaves were slightly bent and the tip of the strawberry was ripping off. There were lots of creases all in the wrong places and even the seeds were drawn on. 

But it still melted your heart. 

“I read somewhere about 1000 paper cranes for a wish and well, cranes are kind of hard and I didn’t have enough paper to make 1000 and-god this is so embarrassing-” he muttered the last part but gained enough courage to look up at you and meet your eyes. Your eyes were soft and patient. “I wished that you wouldn’t hate me. Or that, this wouldn’t y’know...make everything all weird between us. I like you-or well uh- being around you at least and I-I know you joke about it all the time but please don't-” 

Suna paused when he felt you wrap your arms around his waist once again, hugging him back but just a little bit tighter. The small confession not even going through your mind because your attention was too focused on the way his words were making you melt. 

“You’re an idiot” you mumbled into his chest and hugged him a bit tighter. Your words made his stomach drop, but that feeling went away when you pulled back and looked at him with a smile. A smile that said you understood. 

“I’m never gonna force you to tell me anything you don’t want to tell me” You repeated but this time it felt different, it felt warmer. 

“I’m never gonna hate you. I know how you are Rin, you’re not good with your words and I get that. You could've sent me a text but you didn’t. You went out of your way with the flowers and even the little note and this adorable fucking strawberry is more than enough” you laughed but you could feel your eyes watering up slightly with the overwhelming amount of emotions you were feeling all at once. “You don’t need to keep apologizing to me okay? I understand. Thank you,” you smiled. Suna stared down at you. Nodding slowly and you chuckled and fell into his arms once again.

This time, he was the one who held you a bit tighter.

“This side of you is cute you know, but It’s kinda ruining your whole tsundere image you’re going for. Bet the twins would make fun of you for being this thoughtful” you whispered jokingly, making him roll his eyes and huff a quiet “shut up” in annoyance. If only you knew the pain he endured for putting up with those twins. 

You both stayed like that for a little while longer. Holding each other and fitting so perfectly in the arms of the other. If it wasn’t for your phone dinging from a text from Shin asking where you were, Suna swore he would have held you there for the whole night. 

You pulled away first and tugged his hand, “come on, Shin wants me home now so let’s get going ‘kay? Don’t want you getting benched the whole season now do we?” you grinned and walked in front of him and tugged him along. 

Somehow in some way, your fingers slipped perfectly into his.

Suna could only feel the warmth rising in his chest, his daze fixed at the sight of his hands interlocked with yours. 

“Oh and Rin” you called out, making him snap back into reality.

Suna hummed, looking right back at you.

“Tell me when you’re ready, okay?”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

“Text me when you get up in your room safe”

You turned around to him with a quizzical expression before letting out a chuckle, “I’m in front of my house Rin, I got here in one piece” you said and motioned your free hand towards yourself to prove that you were indeed, uninjured. Suna rolled his eyes and bit the inside of his cheek, “you’re clumsy remember, you might fall or something” he muttered and looked away.

You grinned and squeezed his hand, “Awe, look at you caring for me and my wellbeing. My ears might be deceiving me but it sounds like you’re in love with me” you teased and swung your hands together back and forth.

Suna huffed, his mind not properly functioning when the words fell out of his mouth.

“yeah probably”

Simultaneously, his eyes and yours widened and you both froze. 

Both you and Suna blinked at each other twice. Your eyes looked down at your hands that were still interlocked and looked up at his face that was fully drained of any colour. Your heart was beating rapidly against your chest and Suna began to question the very point of his existence.

“W-what?”

“Uh-”

“Y-you said-”

“A-ah I-”

“Oi!” you both jumped and instinctively Suna pulled you closer to him. You looked at up him briefly before turning around to see Granny waiting by the gate with an impatient but also teasing glint in her eyes. “It’s almost 7:30 Yn-chan! You almost missed bingo night! Kiss ya little friend goodnight and come in before Shin and I eat all the mochi we left for ya” she called out but you could hear the teasing tone in her voice.

“C-coming!” you yelled back. Your face was piping hot and you wanted the ground to swallow you whole from the amount of embarrassment and flusteration you were feeling at that moment. 

Granny nodded and walked back inside, and looked up at Shin who was standing with his arms crossed on the porch. Granny walked back to him with a victorious smile on her lips as she gave him a thumbs up. Granny knew what she was doing and she knew what she saw. She’s gonna call and gossip to your mother.

You gulped and took a step back and looked back at Suna. He was still frozen and his mind was racing at what just happened and he too, wanted the ground to swallow him whole. “I-I uh, I guess I gotta go?” you winced, but the tone of your voice made it sound like you were asking a question. Suna nodded, “y-yeah, goodnight I guess” he muttered as he looked away and you watched his face heat up. 

You were both so embarrassed but neither one wanted to let go of the others hand. 

Suna figured he couldn’t keep you out all night and just as he was about to let go of your hand, a sudden wave of confidence went through your veins and you just went ‘fuck it.’

You pulled his arm down towards you taking him back. His eyes widened, “what are you-” you stood slightly on your tippy-toes and kissed his cheek which made him shut up instantly. “That’s for today, thanks. goodbye.” you said frantically. 

Suna froze, too much in shock and his mind was still in the middle of trying to register what just happened and watched as you let go of his hand and covered your face furiously blushing and running off to your gate and slamming it shut.

He stared blankly at the gate door and blinked twice as an attempt to get himself back to reality. He brought his hands up to his cheeks that were on fire. His mind kept replaying the way your soft lips kissed his cheek and could feel the slightest residue of your lip gloss still on his cheek. 

Shit, you really had him wrapped around your finger. 

“Idiot” 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

a/n: BYE STOP IM SO SINGLE THIS IS SAD AND I AM DEVASTATED.

taglist! [CLOSED] @chocolaterumble​ @elianetsantana​ @versatilewindow​ @introvertatitsfinest​ @aristatrois​ @mizukisonoda​ @amberisnotcrazy​ @kritiiiii @iloveyouasmuchaspoohloveshoney @a-moon-fairy @akaasht​ @lotusweebs @marvelous-maxi @laughingismorefun @hhmnvm @sweetyrina @honeydrip @miracleboy420 @rachelexe @charsdummb​ @sxrcasticbacon @loser-keiji @dinablossom @ntimacy @kac-chowsballs@unhappyraspberry @sbaepsae @doebopeepeebbod @missalienqueen @ssuna @violenthead @unstableye @tycrackculture @a-applepi @lollyzen @aisawa-reo @ashybitch89 @sunflowerirl @sapphicstarss @melodiamore​ @valrubiii @urbasicaveragegirl @mint-mai @4kaashl @sugawsites @anngelllla @applekenm @bumblebeesofspace @dreamstormings @milkingkageyama @tsumu-core @luvelyxp @aquariarose

[blakelywintersfield]

Minors

Okay so, I originally wrote this in response to this post (my friend's reblog is linked instead of the original because OP either deleted it from their blog I guess?), but I feel like this constitutes as its own post.

I know this may sound like an overbearing parent "don't trust strangers on the internet" talk, but like. I don't think a lot of you understand just how quickly a situation can escalate; it's scary. I mean that not in a condescending "you think you're untouchable you stupid little child, you don't really know what the world is like" way either, but as in, I don't think internet safety is being taught realistically, so those things you're told to watch out for are far-fetched or already seem suspect.

Predators don't work the way TV shows joke that they do -- most predators aren't going to try and message you at random posing as a teenage girl and attempt to strike up a friendship. A lot interact in community spaces like tumblr, where some level of anonymity is allowed, and it's not odd for there to be people of both minor and adult ages. They interact with a variety of people -- not just targets. They will have full-fledged social circles. Their blogs and social interactions will look like literally any other person's on here.

Then, of the different blogs they follow, they end up interacting a lot with a certain user. Maybe the kind of humor clicks, or similar opinions, or interests. Nothing out of the ordinary; that's how people make friends. Maybe then they start by sending an ask, or a message, or whatever, and that continues for a bit until you two are kind of acclimated to one another, and then, as far as everyone is concerned, it's just a new friend! Neat! That's how you make friends on the internet. They most likely did this with their other friends on tumblr. Nothing weird. In this hypothetical, the minor party has their full name and city public.

But then this person you make friends with -- the way you would any other person on this website -- turns out to be 10+ years your senior. Which like. Honestly, you don't have to cut them out of your life and block them immediately, but you inform them you're 10 years younger than them. A responsible adult would respond to that knowledge with anything from the range of "oh holy shit you're baby uhh I feel a little weird interacting with you so personally" to "oh goodness you are a youngling I will now enter caregiver/parent-like mode". And there will be an established tone from there of "we may still interact but there is going to always be a set emotional distance". It'll have a different dynamic/feeling to the friendships you have with people your age. And it should. Both parties can still care about each other! But this isn't someone you would like. Hang out one on one with. You wouldn't hang out with your mom's friend one on one, or at your teacher's home alone. That'd be weird, right? That should be the same kind of vibe you get with any adult "friendship" you make online (I put friendship in quotes because I feel like... there's a better term for it, or should be one that establishes that adult/minor relationship, but if there is I can't for the life of me remember it).

But maybe that person doesn't go down that path. Maybe it comes off that way at first, but there's a subtle level of emotional manipulation that is subtle enough that you're not certain you can accuse them of being manipulative. "Oh wow, you're so much younger than me... do you still want to talk to me / be friends / etc.? I can leave you alone now if you want." Warning sign #1: they are pressuring you to make the decision; they are placing responsibility on you. And it might feel a little mean to just drop communication all of a sudden because of age -- you got along fine before. Why should that change anything? That's a rational thought process, but it's also the one that benefits them too.

So hypothetically, you say "no it's okay, we can still talk. we were talking just fine before we found out each other's ages so why should that change?" And then maybe the conversation continues normally from there. But then they continue interacting with you as your peers would. You guys talk about stuff that's been stressing you or your problems, just like you would with your peers. Nothing seems out of the ordinary. Warning sign #2: That form of emotional connection isn't normal with an adult/minor relationship. I have minors that follow me. They have talked to me about their problems, and I've offered advice and wisdom; I don't condemn that because, well. As adults, we should help guide the younger if asked. But when it comes to my troubles, I limit how much I discuss with them. I don't bring them up myself (it's often brought up by the other party because I'll post about it on here, like a vent post or whatever). And while I don't brush them off with a short "don't worry about it", I make it clear -- I appreciate that you care enough to make sure I'm okay (because their sympathy / care is just as valuable as an adult's), but even if I'm not okay, the burdens and problems surrounding my troubles will be dealt with by me. I don't ask them for advice. I don't goad them for sympathetic words. And it's not that I believe they couldn't give good advice, or their sympathy means less, but an adult should not be relying on a minor for those levels of emotional labor. That established emotional connection where both parties exchange advice and comfort is how predators manipulate their victims because it's subtle and seemingly harmless, and difficult to paint them as a bad person when you have that level of emotional trust.

And once that emotional connection is established, that's when things can escalate, and get scary, quickly.

One day while talking they will probably bring it up -- the way one of your peers would. Something along the lines of "hey can I tell you something?" or "there's something I want to tell you but I'm afraid you won't want to talk to me anymore if I do" etc. etc.; with that peer/peer dynamic, that'll make you anxious, sure. You'd probably get anxious if they were your own age and said that too. So then, it comes out in some form that "I like you, but like... as more than a friend" or "I think you're really cute; I have for a bit now actually" or something similar. Obviously then it's uncomfortable.

But then you realize -- this is an adult. This is someone who has access to transportation. This is someone that doesn't have to report to someone (i.e. a minor can't just say "I'm going out of town for a week bye!" like your parents would, or SHOULD, be like "uh okay where are you going, who are you going to be with, why, etc. etc. etc."). And they know your full name and a general idea of where you live. You could just block them then and there and remove that information from your blog. But what if they already saved it? What if they already used one of those websites where you can look up a person's address by name for $5? What if they already know where you live, and they had planned on asking to meet up? They might know where you live. And you can't confirm or deny that they know. You can't say for sure if you removed that information before they saved it and used it for that purpose. Suddenly, there's the very real possibility that a pedophile that admitted to being attracted to you knows where you live.

Then what do you do? You should tell your parents or a trusted authority figure. But you're also a teenager and there's the likelihood that your parents might brush it off, or get angry with you, and you might get your internet taken away, etc., which is stressful because that takes away a major social area. To build upon the anxiety with that, there's the risk of unknowing if this person does know where you live, and if they do, if they are just unstable enough to do something drastic, like, y'know. Kidnap you. Because they know where you live. And they may know your school schedule too. And if your parents or trusted authority figure doesn't know about this situation, you may end up a missing child never found at worst, or found with far more trauma (5 years of life being kidnapped as opposed to a few months) that could've been avoided had someone known the situation.

But to 100% ensure your safety, it would have to be reported to the police. Because your parents can't do anything about the fact that a pedophile on the internet might know where you live. They can't confirm or deny that they know, and if they did, there's not much they can do other than keep an eye out for someone that looks out of the ordinary. But if they're most likely not home at the same time you are all the time. So, having the police involved ensures your safety -- if you open a case. You can report it to the police, and they'll ask: do you want to press charges (because it could be considered a form of child endangerment). If you say no, then that guarantees if you are kidnapped, that person would be the first they'd look to as a suspect. But to avoid that kidnapping risk at all, you'd have to say yes. And you're a kid that's now having to get involved in court just to avoid any risk to your safety because a pedophile may or may not have your address and may or may not be someone that would abduct their target, and so even if they didn't have your address and wouldn't kidnap you, you are now in a legal situation, which is. extremely. stressful. As someone's who's dealt with the court system a lot it's stressful no matter what.

And sure, you could omit the last step. But then you'll have that looming anxiety for as long as you're a minor that there is a possibility this person may show up at your house at some point. And that anxiety is fucking torture. I know it firsthand, I know all of this up to the legal portion firsthand, because this is exactly how I got tangled up with a pedophile in high school. That anxiety can make you paranoid. It impacts your sleep, which impacts your emotional tolerance and your concentration. It looms and there's nothing you can do to get rid of it other than convince yourself "they probably don't have my address; they probably won't find me". And that logic becomes sounder as time passes. But it requires time to pass, and in the meantime, you sit in constant suffering suspense.

It's just not fucking worth it, okay? You might think "this would never happen to me" but like. I was the fat emo weirdo in high school, literally considered attractive by no one and told so by peers and I still had it happen to me. So don't think "I'm not appealing enough" or whatever. Put self-esteem issues aside here, because to them, you're underage and at a power dynamic disadvantage not just physically, but most likely emotionally too. They care that you're a certain (under)age and can be manipulated into sexual acts. They will target you no matter how ugly you think you are or how unattractive your peers have convinced you.

So please. As an adult, that went through this situation (and could've had it turn out a lot worse tbh) -- do not disclose your real name (especially last names), location more specific than country, phone number, or school publicly online or to anyone you cannot 100% trust. I practice half of these in adulthood just to err on the side of caution since a full name and phone number alone could be used to find my address, and there are some preeeeetty unstable people out there. As a minor, absolutely no one needs any information unless you plan on meeting them in person, which should only be done after you've gotten to know them extremely well and both parties' parents know and are involved. It doesn't need to be on your public profile, and it shouldn't be on your public profile. I want your social media experience to be as enjoyable as possible, I don't want you feeling like you have to constantly keep an eye out for predators. But to keep yourself as safe as possible, don't purposefully make that information public. It's simple, but it’ll help you avoid so much potential stress.

Please stay safe.

[sirthisisa-wendys]

Investigations (Part 7): Ran Haitani x Fem!Reader

wc: 1.6k

tw: NSFW is you squint

masterlist

song recommendation:

You try your best to shuffle around the kitchen surreptitiously, clicking the espresso pod into the machine with a soft 'snap'.

The machine begins its duty, whirring to life before the liquid is deposited into the cup below.

Success.

Your fingers wrap around the mug and take it to the counter, where you've already prepared your milk and syrup for a quick and easy cup of coffee.

Lately, you've had to sneak and make coffee (all futile attempts ruined by Kai or Ran), but you consider today full of promise. You'd gotten the formula down so far.

"I thought I said no coffee."

Your hands hover over the cup, the steam caressing your fingers like a warm invitation. Your eyes don't move to look at Ran, but they do watch his fingers snatch the cup away from you - full of warm milk and espresso.

"Y/n, it's not good for the baby."

"Okay, but..." Your feet carry you to the sink, where Ran is pouring the concoction down the drain. "Just a taste?"

"No."

"A sip?"

"No."

"I'll make it and just stick my tongue in it once."

"No."

Ran stands firm on his opinions at all times. Especially now. Arms cross over your chest and you huff, turning away from him.

"So strict." Ran fingers slide down your neck, resting around your full hips.

"It's not just about you," he begins, kissing the space between your neck and shoulder. "I'm looking out for our child, too. You know that."

"I do," you groan.

"Now, we have a baby shower to host. Let's get ready."

_____________________________________________________________

"We thought you were gone forever!" The three women come around you and huddle close, cooing, and crying, spewing lamentations and satisfied praises that you've returned.

Sanzu - out of the kindness of his heart - planned the baby shower, and you're at his house, eating cake with your friends and consuming hors d'oeuvres. But when you find a free moment, you corner Ran in the kitchen.

"Did you tell the others?"

"Tell them what?" Ran tilts his head at you and leans onto the counter, frowning. Your face smoothes out into an expression of disappointment, and you sigh.

Of course, he hadn't.

It's still your job to carry this terrible secret. It's still your job to bury your deepest, darkest knowing, all while the other girls are parading about like their husbands aren't killers and extortionists.

"Hey, y/n! It's time to open the presents!"

_____________________________________________________________

The water surrounding your figure is warm, full of bubbles and Epsom salt, as well as a little bath bomb that Ran bought - well, he bought sixteen, but that's beside the point.

"Feeling okay? Is it too hot?" You look over to the man sitting on the toilet seat, his elbows resting on his knees as he observes you pour water over your belly.

"It's fine," you murmur, blinking slowly. "Feels good."

"Want to turn on the jets or--"

"I want to join Bonten." Ran's face drops, his violet eyes clouding with confusion.

"I'm sorry?"

"You heard me." You stare at him, fully intent on getting your desired response. "I want to be a part of what you do."

"Babe, no." Ran leans his head forward, rubbing the bridge of his nose in frustration.

"You haven't even listened to me," you whisper, looking down at the ten toes poking out of the water. "You always do this. You tell me 'no' because that's the way you want things. I can't even drink coffee without your permission."

"Listen, I'll let you do whatever you want, but Bonten is out of the question. You're pregnant --"

"Then I can wait until I have the baby."

"Even after that, I'm going to say no. This is a dangerous business." He emphasizes his words with a shake of his head, pressing his lips together.

"You act like I wasn't an investigative journalist for ten years."

"This shit could get you killed, y/n."

"Yes," you begin. "But you do it every day. I want to be a part of it."

"Why?" Ran finally asks, and your lips curl into a smile.

"I know things you don't know. The media follows you very closely, and you need a good image if you ever run into a problem with... say, law enforcement. What better way to prove that this is a harmless organization than hiring a woman - your wife?" Ran quirks his lips, looking at the door of the bathroom with consideration.

"Is there any particular skill you'll avail to us other than just public relations? I mean, I could get someone to do that who isn't my wife."

"I have connections that will divert attention away from Bonten, if necessary." You think of the little group you and the other wives have created, and send a mental apology their way. "You can use me to get the word out about any other suspicious groups who might be involved. Aid and abet, like a good wife."

Ran stands from the toilet, sighing deeply. "I'll ask Mikey. But don't expect me to attempt to sway him with my loyalty. If anything, I'll ask him to really think about it before he makes a choice."

"That's all I want," you breathe, taking Ran's hand and pressing your lips against the back of it. "You're too good to me."

"Don't thank me yet, sweetheart."

_____________________________________________________________

Convincing Ran to part with his old-fashioned ways is something you're very skilled at. All you need to do is get on your knees... and be as sweet as you can be.

"Babe," you mutter, sucking Ran's thick cock from the side. "You're such a good husband."

"Buttering me up for Mikey, huh?" Fingers cup the back of your head and push you down slightly. "Why am I not surprised?"

And every single time, Ran sees straight through your little act. But he enjoys it nonetheless. He loves seeing you like this - giving him the attention he missed so much while you were gone.

"Because you know me so well. And that's why you married me."

That's why you married me. Ran's eyes close as he re-imagines himself the first time he decided to visit you, hands full of shit he didn't have to buy, and eyes full of stars at the sight of you answering the door in a tank top and shorts with a cast on your leg. That's when he knew that he wanted to marry you. Not because you're good at anything in particular, but because you were so ordinary... So normal. He needed someone like you then, and he needs you now.

"Stop."

"Am I doing something wrong?" you murmur, but Ran shakes his head, strands of his black and white hair flopping back and forth.

"You're perfect," he whispers. "You're always so perfect." He brings you off your knees and face to face with him, holding you by the arms. "Let me make love to you. I'll do the work," Ran promises. "You just enjoy yourself."

"But--"

"I've already told you what I'm going to do. Just let me give you what you deserve." Ran angles forward, leaning into a gentle kiss that makes your knees weak and your head spin.

Ran spoons you from behind on the bed, holding your leg up and sliding in and out of you with care. The other arm is holding you against him - wrapped around your chest - as he whispers sweet nothings into your ear.

"I love the way you moan my name," he breathes. "You always know how to make me feel like the only man in the world."

"You are," you reply honestly. "You're the only man for me."

_____________________________________________________________

"Why do you want to join Bonten?"

The dead eyes of the man across from you are unyielding, and part of you feels nervous that he's staring at you so intensely.

"I want to help you all out. I want to make sure that not only do my children have something to rely on when they grow up, but that my husband is taken care of in all ways."

"Your children and your husband?" You think of Ran, who is just outside of the door, probably pacing with his hands in his pockets. "Your husband just spent three hours arguing with me."

"About?"

"You." The man stands, and Sanzu looks over at him with blank eyes. He wants to chime in, but he can't say anything right now. Not when Mikey was supposed to handle this himself. "Your presence here will be controversial. Especially since you're... in the state you're in."

"Pregnancy isn't a fatal disease."

"No, but being in Bonten could be fatal. And I don't know if both ran and I would be willing to accept the consequences of two deaths on our hand."

"But--" Sanzu raises a finger to his lips, warning you to be quiet.

"However," the man murmurs, rolling his neck around. "Sanzu, Rindou, and Kakucho have vouched for you and your connections." Your shoulders slacken, and you lean back in the chair, somewhat relieved. "I will put it to an anonymous vote in thirty-six hours. Whatever the outcome is, we'll both accept it."

A blind vote.

Thirty-six hours.

"Thank you, sir." You stand and bow slightly, hands clasped together. When you leave the room, Ran is waiting for you in the hallway, eyes wide.

"Well?"

"It'll be put to an anonymous vote in thirty-six hours. Whatever happens, happens."

Ran's face is anything but pleased as you drive home, but you don't worry about that too much. You have one and a half days to wait for the results, and you'd make the best of it either way.

[mitsukui]

blessed be the mystery of love. | f.w.

Pairing: Fred Weasley x reader.

Summary: Fred Weasley seems to be a new boy: he has fallen in love, and a couple of unexpected things have come along with it. Apparently, his recently discovered romantic interest has never heard of him, and he is now someone who...writes...love letters?! Well, that is surely weird...

Word Count: 2k.

Warnings: none!

Disclaimer: none of the pictures used in the edit below belong to me; I simply put them together.

A/N: this is probably my favorite so far! I’ve been working on it for such a long time, so I hope you all enjoy it! I’m honestly such a sucker for soft Fred...Please, leave me some feedback if you feel like it! My askbox is open for your opinions, thoughts and requests. Thank you so much for your time and attention ❤

Masterlist!

Dark brown eyes studied your silhouette surreptitiously, which was utterly uncommon for their owner. One who once was daring now hid behind heart-felt walls that looked like you. A flirtatious behavior had been replaced by occasional stuttering and disinterest in other romantic affairs.

People around him could effortlessly notice the situation was taking its toll on him. However, they seemed too dumbfounded by it to say something – words were long gone from their lips, and from his own as well.

Fred Weasley had fallen desperately in love, but you were unaware of his existence.

Somehow, it sounded ironic: how could you not know about him?! Every single soul in Hogwarts knew who he and his twin were, and he enjoyed such a thing. Unlike his slightly younger identical brother, Fred was one to enjoy popularity and attention. He sought fame and recognition, and he would never complain if a few hookups came along with that.

And, yet, there you were – iridescent and untouchable. You were forcefully popping novel thoughts into his mind. Would you ever lay eyes on him? And if you ever did, what would you think and feel?

It was high time you noticed him, and he could only count on himself to make it happen.

Fred desired to make a different approach, one you had not yet seen. His eyes had captured a few other admirers here and there trying to get your heart, but none of them had achieved success. He ought to be the one to do that.

And love letters would most certainly help him get there.

Writing letters was an arduous task, and it consumed all of his energy. His quill scribbled fiercely against fragments of parchment, heavy sighs filled the silence around him, and every inch of his skin burned in longing and embarrassment. George could be easily found doing something like that; but not Fred. He could be found causing mischief or attaching his lips to someone else’s.

Nevertheless, there he was, combining words and allowing the dark paint to splash against the paper in order to pour his heart out.

His first letter was short – hesitant, almost; after all, it was impossible for him to know how you would react to the approach he had chosen. He had put so much effort into it, despite the small number of words and expressed feelings. It was crystal clear you deserved bigger things; even so, that scenario was entirely atypical to him.

He was just as disoriented as you were when a barn owl dropped an almost unimportant-considered envelope right in front of you, interrupting your breakfast in the Great Hall one morning.

He had been eyeing the owl entrances for a little while when he finally was able to spot the one he had previously picked for you. His lips trembled nervously, and his fingers traveled straight up. Lately, he had been developing a habit of biting his fingernails whenever he was anxious, and anxiety was the only emotion possible for that morning.

What if you ended up not liking the note? Maybe you would think he could be a creep or something similar to that. It was unknown whether you had a significant other or not. Were his words good enough? Would you ever look at him like he so lovingly looked at you?

One of your hands curiously reached out for the envelope while the other one briefly fed the owl. You furrowed your eyebrows together as your eyes ran through the lines: it was a tad difficult to read whatever was written on the parchment, given the handwriting was not one of the best. However, you managed to decode the message, and a smile soon spread across your lips. Despite the distance Fred watched you from, the boy could swear that even a small giggle spilled out from your lips.

The small note read something along the lines of:

“To the one who is now devouring my heart.

I mean no harm. My feelings are of pure admiration.

You are gold.

I hold you in my thoughts.

- W.”

The words he had previously written rang in his brain, and he felt ridiculous. He had never had a good relationship with words, writing, or anything related to that. Why on Earth had he chosen to write you a love letter? You were probably laughing at the stupidity that the note was drenched in.

You allowed both your curiosity to dwell in your core and your eyes to analyze the people who crowded the Great Hall that morning. You studied all the possibilities, and you did not notice Fred Weasley. He felt invisible and, for the first time, he enjoyed it.

After that, a second love letter was written. And then a third one, and even a fourth one, too! He grew bold once again, and his secret passion became stronger.

One day, dizzy due to his recently rediscovered boldness, he allowed his quill to dance against the parchment as he wrote you a fifth letter. This one was different from all the previous ones; he still offered you his heart and tried making you realize how much he secretly admired you. But there was something more to it – he sent you something else other than the letter alone.

The arrival of the usual owl in another freezing morning in Hogwarts quickly muffled the chatting and cutlery noises that hovered over every person in the Great Hall. It barely took you one second to smile at the sight, which caused Fred to smile himself – he absolutely adored your smile.

Those anonymous letters had become part of your daily routine, and they were something you eagerly waited for. Being both a Hogwarts student and a teenager at the same time was no easy duty. Your spirit tended to get overwhelmed from time to time, and you found yourself turning to the anonymous letters for an escape from the reality that surrounded you.

However, as soon as you brushed your fingertips against the envelope, you felt an additional weight to it, something that had never been there before. Attempting to waste no time, you reached for the letter, and a smile did not fail to paint your face; it was so easy for him to make you smile, even though you still did not know who he was.

“I must know whatever fills your heart once your eyes reach the very last word in each of my letters.

Would you mind wearing this little thing if you are not bothered by me and my confessions?

It is small and simple, but it is given to you with love.

As always, I hold you in my thoughts.

- W.”

And then, you finally saw it: a tiny decorative pin, which you figured it out as to be put on your robes. It was shaped as a white envelope sealed with a red heart. You disagreed with the words written on the letter, once you did not see it as something simple. It was beautiful. It was your new favorite thing. It was attached to your robes in the flash of an eye. And how it could not be?!

You profoundly enjoyed his secretive actions. For you, it was extremely sweet that someone admired you so much that they chose to sit down and write you comforting and loving words. A pure energy radiated from every single thing he had sent you, and you wished for an identity reveal. You wished to discover whoever your secret admirer was only to confess you also admired them, mostly because of the sweetness existing in their personality.

It was high time you solved this mystery, and you could only count on yourself to make it happen.

When his sixth letter arrived, you had one of your own as well. You did not bother reading his words right away; after all, you had more important things to do. The barn owl was distracted by one of your hands, offering it small pieces of buttered toast, while the other tied the words you had previously written up its leg.

“Can you do this for me?” You whispered gently to the animal standing close to you. As funny as it sounded, you had grown fond of that owl in a way, too. “Take this back to the one who’s been sending you to me, alright? I promise you I won’t peek! I’m asking them to meet me tonight, in Classroom Eleven. Do you think they will come?” An airy chuckle left your lips and you swore your heart was melting at how much attention the owl seemed to be paying to your words. Before it took off, the animal playfully nibbled your fingers and your smile grew wider.

Like promised, you did not allow yourself to look wherever the owl was going to. All of your curiosity was being saved for later that night. There was no way for you to know if he would ever show up, and that hurt your insides a bit. What if it had all been a cruel joke?

The same wonders that once had haunted his brain now haunted yours.

But the night did not cease to fall, and the moon did not cease to shine. It was terribly cold, but your feet still automatically took you to Classroom Eleven, one of the classrooms that were hardly ever used for classes or any other purposes. It was a risky place, given the fact that it was of so easy access. However, you thought the possibility of getting caught was rather exciting. So you entered the classroom, as quietly as you could manage, and you waited.

Fred, on the other hand, could feel his stomach being punched repeatedly by a thousand of invisible hands. He was painfully apprehensive, and one of the signs that revealed that was his constant pacing in a deserted hallway.

He obviously would never stand you up, but the thought of running away popped up in his brain a few times. This was an extremely ridiculous behavior for someone like him. And even though he knew he had to get it done, he was still so intimidated by it all.

“Just rip it off like a band-aid.” The boy whispered to himself, his steps finding a slower pace and his hands being shoved into his pockets. Deep breaths were taken and he was finally able to gather all the courage he needed to walk towards and enter the classroom.

Your body was resting against an empty desk, which it seemed like it had not been used in years. Staring out the window, you secretly wished you had worn something better for that moment; perhaps, your pajamas and a long knitted cardigan over them had not been the best choice.

When you were about to start your seventh mental curse about your idiot choices, hesitant knocks on the door made a mess out of your line of thoughts. They came as a warning that things were about to either go very well or terribly bad.

And, then, a long silence followed. Both of you panicked, each one on a different side of the wooden door. You wondered if you should answer something to the knocks, he wondered if he should have said something. Your body was straightened up, and you suddenly realized your hands were getting slightly sweaty.

He opened the heavy door so slowly that, as you watched it, you could see your life flashing right in front of your eyes.

Finally, you spotted something in the dark. Peeking through the door, your eyes captured the sight of locks of an orange marmalade shaded hair entering the classroom. Right then and there, you felt like everything had just gained a new and brighter light.

You were breathless. The boy timidly standing there, still a bit far away from you, was the most stunning human you had ever seen.

His dark eyes observed you, both curiosity and fear being expressed wordlessly. He attempted to aim a small smile at you, which you gladly accepted and offered him another smile back.

After a few moments of intense stares and exchanged grins, your voice finally cut the comfortable silence that had been set between the two of you.

“The wonders are finally ceased.”

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