#honestly my biggest problem so far is that none of the characters feel like my type </3

[divorcedwife]

Are you interested at all in Veilguard? Do you think that Anders may show up, since in 2 he always talked about wanting to go to Tevinter and Veilguard is set there? Given that he survived 2, of course.

i'll definitely play it! if only out of a sense of duty, i've come this far and i'd like to see what happens next. i don't think he will, i think a fenris cameo is more likely (?) but im really bad at predicting these sorts of things, im pretty casual on lore and i dont keep up with hints and trailers, or the extra materials like the comics and so on. but i think it would be funny, so it should happen. anders dlc when......

[ploppythespaceship]

Uglies - Movie Thoughts

On a whim, I decided to start re-reading the Uglies series a couple months ago -- so imagine my surprise when I found out it was getting a movie! Said movie is now out, and it was interesting to watch with the book being so fresh in my head.

Overall, it's... eh. It's not a complete train wreck, the way most critics seem to want you to think, but it is fairly bland and uninspired. It's a very watered down version of the book. It also has the misfortune of feeling like yet another a Hunger Games wannabe, despite the original book pre-dating that series by several years.

Spoilers for everything under the cut.

What I Liked

Based on reviews, I seem to be in the minority here, but I thought the cast was pretty good. People seem to hate Joey King as Tally, but I thought she was fine. Brianne Tju is easily the best in the cast, stealing the whole damn movie as Shay. Laverne Cox also gives an excellent performance as Cable, though I do think she should not have been given that role for other reasons (which I'll get into later).

I've also seen complaints that the characters aren't ugly enough. They talk about how ugly they are and point out their specific ugly features, when they don't actually appear that ugly. And I think everyone complaining about that is completely missing the point. The "Uglies" aren't actually ugly -- they're just normal people, who've been conditioned to think their imperfect features are hideous.

I was honestly unsure how the Pretties would be visualized -- in fact, I wondered if the book would just be fundamentally unadaptable because of it -- but they did a fairly good job. I think leaning on CGI and unnatural affectations was the right way to go. All the Pretties have this uncanny quality to them that suits the story perfectly.

The overall production design was solid as well. I like how Uglyville is all gray concrete and muted tones, while New Pretty Town is shimmering golds. Then upon reaching the Smoke, all the colors of nature finally come through. I do think that could have pushed that last one a little bit more, but it still works well.

Apart from that, I don't really have much to shout out. It's competently written, well-performed, well put together. I know it doesn't sound like I have much praise, but it is a competent movie.

What I'm Mixed On

By far the biggest change from the book is Peris becoming a Special. And I'm torn on it. On the one hand, it does make him a bigger part of the story -- he's honestly not much more than an inciting incident in the book. It gives him and Tally a unique arc that's probably the strongest through-line in the story. On the other hand, the Specials as a concept are so under-cooked (more on that later) and the actor is so bland that it still doesn't quite land the way it's supposed to.

What I Didn't Like

The pacing of this movie is by far its worst issue. We are flying through this plot. There is no time for anything to breathe, for characters to develop meaningful connections, for the bigger moments to feel earned. Some things do make sense to condense -- Tally's journey to the Smoke would have been incredibly boring without her internal monologue, so condensing most of that into a montage makes sense. But I do feel we lost too much. That's where a lot of Tally's characterization comes out, where we can see her bravery and ingenuity -- none of that comes across in the movie.

A lot of important beats are rushed. Tally agreeing to help Dr. Cable is over in a flash. It feels like Tally's in the Smoke for all of fifteen minutes. Tally and David barely interact, so their relationship has no real stake. Everyone is kidnapped by Special Circumstances, and then rescued immediately after. I almost think a 5-6 episode mini-series would have worked better -- but that might have introduced the opposite problem, where everything takes too long.

The movie also has frequent montages that don't really work. It seems like they were trying to show the passage of time, but it just makes everything feel even shorter.

The beginning of the movie has an exposition problem, as well. It opens with a montage explaining the entire setting... before leading into several scenes that also explain the setting through dialogue. We get fed the same details about the surgery and the Rusties and the flowers at least three times at the start, and it gets grating.

As already mentioned, Tally is pretty severely underwritten. In the book, she has a distinct personality and a unique presence. In the movie, she's just the main character because she happens to be the main character. Her intelligence and resourcefulness are pretty much gone.

I also think changing her motivation for going to the Smoke did her a disservice. In the book, Tally goes to the Smoke so she can have her surgery, and because she's convinced herself that Shay needs her help. In the movie, Dr. Cable tells her that the Smokies have a weapon, and she will be saving lives by helping to find them. I think giving her a more selfless motivation robs her of her character arc. She always comes across as someone trying to help, who wants to best for other people, rather than someone who had to consciously learn that.

The Specials are barely even a presence. I'm not sure they were even directly called Specials. People who hadn't read the book would never realize that there was an entire separate status of person here. You never see their disturbingly beautiful faces or their terrifying strength. Considering how pivotal the Specials are to the overall story, especially in the later books, it's really odd not to see them properly established here.

Like I said, Laverne Cox gives an excellent performance as Dr. Cable... but I think they should have thought twice before casting a trans woman. It's not necessarily that there's a trans woman in the villainous role, but that there's a trans woman in the villainous role who specifically wants to force people to have surgeries to brainwash them. Like... did the optics of that really not occur to anyone? At all? I think Cox could have played David's mother, instead.

[dokidokitsuna]

RWBY: Next Steps

This is just a design collection (remember when I used to do those? 'Winter Mission', 'Summer Tour'?? Fun times~)...and it may be my last. Its only real purpose is to give me something fun to draw for the NeverFell Projects wrap-up series. The recent Adam and Cinder designs are technically part of this collection, too. ^^

These were much harder to do than those two, though...I've spent ~2 months chipping away at this set, trying and retrying to address several different RWBY design criticisms while still making the girls look good. ಥ_ಥ I've finally begun approaching success, though, so I wanted to talk a bit about these ideas.

Ruby The only one I managed to design in one try. ^^; This was my answer to the question I felt was posed by Ruby's Vol. 7 design: i.e. "how do we do a new Ruby design that feels more 'mature'??" Because I never liked how the V7 design attempted to do that. :/

Between the new hairstyle and the new 'generic adventurer' clothes, it felt less like they were trying to evolve Ruby Rose and more like they didn't like her original design and wanted to get as far away from it as possible. V1-Ruby was such an iconic look (and STILL IS), and yet there's no trace of it in V7-Ruby. None of the goth-lolita style or playful edge that even V4-Ruby managed to preserve...instead they just scrubbed everything out to start from scratch, with a new design that's honestly 'meh' at best.

So what I did was stick closely to V1-Ruby, while adding just a few big changes to make the look distinct. You say a 'combat skirt' is too childish for an older Ruby? Well then we'll make it shorts...but shorts that are just as frilly and cute as the original skirt, with a similar overall shape. You say her original hairstyle is too boring and 'safe'? Well, then we'll change it...by simply shaving half of it off. It's a much edgier look that simultaneously preserves the original shape of her hair: from every angle except front and back, her silhouette will remain the same.

You say you want to give her new shoes, but don't want the fandom to make fun of you for covering them in dozens of belts again? Here's a wild idea: cowboy boots. ^^ A totally unexpected, unique item that still fits in with the antique-ish vibe of her goth clothes.

Basically, I just wanted to prove that you can do something dramatically different with Ruby without completely abandoning her fashion sense.

Criticisms: The details are still lacking; I think I should work some red accents into her corset and boots. Also, I originally designed this outfit with a white shirt, and I kinda want it back (she had the team colors! R, W, B, and Y! ;_;)...the problem is that it clashes with the sheer thigh-highs. One must go...I'm sure I'll figure it out

Weiss The toughest of the bunch: I did three different Weiss designs before landing on this one. ^^;;; The big epiphany came when I realized that Weiss looks her best when she mirrors Ruby. The girls' original design concepts share a lot of features; I feel like the characters were designed to look like they belong together, and figured I might as well honor that.

ALSO-- and this was the biggest priority for Weiss' design-- I firmly believe that she should not look like a princess anymore. From a character designers' perspective, it is ludicrous that they gave her the giant Disney ballgown in the same volume where they put classism at the center of the plot and have her send her bourgeoisie father to jail. That right there is the definition of mixed messages...

I thought the whole point of Weiss' character arc was to distance herself from the uber-rich parasites of her family and fellow 'Atlas elites'. I thought we cemented that when she officially lost her "heiress" title in V4. o_O I expected her next look to ditch the crown and visually show that she's past the point of 'rebelling'-- there's no more authority in her life for her to rebel against; she's free now! But alas...

So as usual, I had to do it myself. This Weiss outfit is definitely still fancy, with the coattailed vest and ruffled sleeves, but there's a lot less 'decoration'; fewer jewels, fewer details. The construction is straightforward and simple. And of course, no more tiara. Instead I decided to give her a li'l snow pea flower and ribbon, which ended up inspiring her new periwinkle purple-y color scheme. Like her original design, it's actually fairly colorful, but does its job and puts the emphasis on the white elements.

Criticisms: ...Not many, this came out pretty good. ^^ I might reconsider the black coattails, but if I do I'll probably just switch it out with the indigo inner vest. I like the idea of her outfit construction mirroring Ruby's, but her color scheme mirroring Blake's, since they have a closer bond in NeverFell.

Blake Blake designs are notoriously difficult; if you wanna hear some great reasons why, I suggest you check out this old Twiins iink RWBY design ranking video, which always helps guide me when I do redesigns for the main 4. Anyway, this phenomenon makes it hard to describe what I did...I guess you could say I tried to combine all the best elements of all her outfits, while clinging to the 'fancy action girl' vibe of her original design.

I'm most proud of her new hairstyle-- I dunno why, I just enjoyed working on it and making those decisions. ^^ It's hard to tell, but it IS shorter; now shoulder-length instead of back-length. We make up for this with additional volume, emphasizing the waves in her hair texture by pushing them outward. And most notably: she keeps the ribbon. She just wears it differently, using it to accentuate her ears instead of hiding them. This way, we keep the point of interest on her head while still showing her character growth.

Criticisms: Infinite, countless. This is a good look, but something is definitely still off. ^^;;; I think some additional detail in certain places (not sure where yet...) might help 'finish' it, so to speak. Maybe some extra yellow accents...? Also, the bow obviously gets lost in her hair this way. I've tried several color changes and don't like any of them; I think I may just have to texture it differently in the final product. Fingers crossed...

Yang Another tough one...I only made 2 design drawings, but the colors took several rounds of trial and error. I think my excitement over finally arriving at a good color scheme TODAY was what spurred me to make this post. ^^;

Anyway...there is a specific piece of Yang design criticism I hear fairly often that drives me up the wall: people commonly complain that she doesn't wear enough yellow; that she doesn't represent her character color well because all she wears is a yellow shirt. And the character designer in me wants to rip my teeth out whenever I hear this, because it blindly ignores the giant fairy-tale-inspired mass of yellow that is her hair, and the purposely attention-grabbing pops of yellow that make up Ember Celica. They're not "clothes", technically, but they're still part of the design! It's like saying a character with green skin can't represent the color green if all their clothes are black...without realizing that maybe their clothes are black BECAUSE they have green skin, in order to draw your attention to it...!! (╬▔皿▔)╯I just jifjkdsnfksahujknsjnfufh

...Anyway, anyway...the point is, it's difficult to take a character design with so much natural yellow in it and add yellow clothes and still have it read well. But because I like a challenge, I decided to take it on. I think the difference between the mustard leather and neon yellow hair is large enough to make it work, while still feeling casual enough for everyday wear. The champagne off-white she wears in her 'Hunter' outfit (which heavily inspired this) looks great, but it feels too 'classy' to me; like something specifically meant to dazzle the audience with her beauty for one special adventure, not for her to wear often.

On that note, my secondary mission with this design was just to make Yang look cute again, by following the structure of her V1 look, and even adding a little skirt on top of her battle shorts, which looks surprisingly natural considering she almost never wears one.

I don't know what happened in the canon to make the character designer forget the 'Yellow Beauty' part of her character concept; tbh even if her gender presentation gets more masculine she can still look pretty. Designs like Ozma, V7 Qrow and V4 Ren show that they understand this, but choose to cover Yang up in flavorless sheets of beige anyway. :T Making sure she always has a boob window isn't enough; the clothes themselves need to say something too.

Criticisms: ...Honestly, none? I think this might be solid. :> We'll see what happens when I draw it properly. I hope the white socks work out, because then she'll successfully be wearing the RWBY color scheme, which fits her (former, implied...) role as the glue holding the team together.

[aquatark]

Can I ask your opinion on Endless Ocean Luminous?

Thanks for the ask anon! :D

I've been trying to get my thoughts on this game together into something that makes sense for a while now, but no better time than the present!

tldr: I seem to like it more than most people! I think this game is alright though it's still very flawed, and I'm still enjoying myself with it, but it seems very clearly rushed and it shows. I'm still very happy that the series has a third entry at all, and am looking forward to the future of the series after this game!

...okay, now I'm gonna aimlessly ramble for wayyy too long lmao (spoilers under the cut if you haven't played)

So, to get a few of my biggest gripes out of the way:

Having completed it... the plot is god awful (esp the ending, iykyk). I think I would have preferred having none at all, but Daniel is cool

The English voice of Sera isn't ideal, though this is an issue other languages (like Japanese, French) don't seem to have

The setting, character development, and lore is much more shallow, uninteresting, and poorly-explored through gameplay than any other diving game Arika has made, which is saying a lot bc EO1's plot was invented pretty close to release, and is known for also not being great

The game doesn't run as smoothly as I'd like. maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I remember a time when devs didn't feel like they could release their game if it crashes as often online as this game does

Some of this game's creature textures are far less polished than they ought to be for a Switch game. Surprisingly, most of the ones ported from Arika's defunct mobile fishing game are fine! It's stuff like the megamouth shark and bigfin reef squid that really stand out to me as sub-par

I'm not as bothered about this as some ppl seem to be, but I would have liked a little more customization freedom, ala EO2's suit cuts

Many creature descriptions are copied verbatim from EO2, which I really dislike. wasted a perfect opportunity to highlight different aspects of creatures, not rehash the same tired and basic facts

Though I love the concept of dynamic time of day underwater, it's executed very poorly imo. Could have done with some more fine-tuning (something that could be said abt... a lot of this game lol)

All of this however only detracts a little from my enjoyment of the game overall.

The fact that something like the story can be shipped in the final product with a dev team that shares many many people with the original EO games (seriously, compare the staff lists on the wiki, I genuinely teared up seeing so many familiar faces again)... suggests to me that this game was subjected to crazy time constraints, though I don't have any concrete proof. Nintendo has been known recently to be anti-crunch with some of its biggest IPs, so maybe an Arika problem? Regardless, this game shouldn't have released in the condition it's in, and definitely should not be the price it is.

I really don't like being too negative though, so I won't be! After all, and this may be controversial coming from an EO blog... but the various flaws of Arika's previous diving games made this not be the biggest surprise to me. I mean, I 100%ed EO1, including collecting every salvage and getting all gear/hairstyles! Do you have any idea how hellish that is? I eat slop for breakfast!!

I've still been playing a lot of this game with my dear friend MDB (us pictured below), and there are a lot of things I like about it!

I will, for example, drool all over this game's sound design till the day my son "dies" in a tragic submarine accident. Ayako Saso (main talent behind Everblue 1/2, EO1/2, and Luminous' original compositions and sound in general) knocked it out of the park as usual, with the menu sfx feeling really Everblue reminiscent in a way I adore, and the music easily being some of the best in the series. I know many fans are disappointed by there being no vocal tracks, but honestly? While I like the fact EO1 and 2 had them, they simply wouldn't have fit in this game. So I'm chill about it.

I think the random generation and focus on multiplayer are fun and fresh for the series! I have EO1 and 2 when I want polished singleplayer gameplay, and this game when I feel like something else. EO1 and 2's multiplayer objectively sucked, so it's a really interesting angle to take. The gameplay loop is entertaining enough for me - I like salvaging, scanning creatures, collecting tags, and hunting orbs, both in solo and shared dives. The framework is solid, but could use a little more meat.

The fact they were finally able to realize the "Ancient Sea" concept that had been thrown around during development since EO1 is lovely. Despite having been a dinosaur kid, I'm not really knowledgeable on any of the species depicted in-game, so their designs don't bother me... I'm just a sucker for human ruins overrun by prehistoric life!

Though there are some categories of sea creature that I'm a little sad not to see anymore, like seadragons, sea slugs, and many marine mammals... I don't mind this game's different roster. I like the creature variety, because imo, it would have been a little boring and predictable to have the roster just be every creature that was previously in EO, plus some new ones. This system avoids the kind of problem Pokémon games are currently having, where they have so many critters that they can't possibly put them all in one game, but fans are upset not to have the entire dex ported, y'know? It's like playing EO for the first time again!

I've seen several people theorize that the series was "intentionally sabotaged with a bad new game, so that they have an excuse not to make any more EO games", and... I mean... all I'll say about that is that there's no use killing something that's already dead lol. There'd been no games for over a decade, and very little demand for one - why would a game company looking to make money put so much effort and money into marketing, development, pre-order bonuses, and My Nintendo rewards in order to create hype for a game that's bad on purpose... when they could have kept the series dead for free? Nintendo clearly believe the concept of diving games has legs (or fins ig), with a staff team who love the ocean and dive irl, and are trying new things to see if it sticks better than the previous four games they've made, which collectively sold worse than Luminous did.

It may not all be great, or even good, but experimentation and trying unconventional things is what made EO such a special series in the first place baybee! We just remember the parts of it we liked, and forget the really dumb stuff. The EO team has never been perfect, and I can see their smudgy fingerprints all over this game... I mean, these are the same devs who didn't notice a crash so bad it had their game recalled, and repeatedly yoinked copyrighted material without permission to use in their games... but that's a long post for another day lol.

Soooo yeah! Those are some of my thoughts! Feel free to express your own thoughts on the game here - I'd be curious what other people think, and I'd be more than happy to answer more asks on specific elements of the game, or just getting me talkin' about this game, or any other game in the series for that matter! Any EO questions at all, ask away~!

Thanks for reading, hehe! >( ')

[rowanul-tyr]

So. Dawntrail.

I finished the 7.0 MSQ roughly a week ago, during the early access period, and overall I had a great time with it! My thoughts on the expansion as a whole have been marinating in the brain pot since then, and I wanted to touch on some of those thoughts and why I think this has been such a great expansion so far, at least story-wise. All under a cut for spoilers, and I’ll honestly be talking mostly vaguely about plot stuff anyway. And I’ll mark anything specific that is spoilers, and dividing things zone by zone.

Anyway.

First and foremost, since I feel like this will help put my overall opinion into perspective, is my ranking of expansions so far.

1: SHB will forever be king to me in a ton of ways; part of it is this was the expansion I started with, but I also just love the story it tells so much and even if I have little gripes, they’re all so minor that it doesn’t really matter

2: a tie between HW and EW, actually--both are excellent, and while I have some issues with parts of them, the positives for the most part outweigh my issues

3: another tie between STB and ARR--I think both of these are good, but have some issues that really can’t be ignored. And they’re only at the bottom because that’s how lists work.

DT is not perfect in my eyes (not by a long shot), but it is giving SHB a true run for its money in terms of how much I liked it. Like I said initially, I don’t think it’s without its problems (no expansion is, even SHB no matter how much I love it), but overall there is just SO much good stuff here that I am 100% willing to forgive it.

Before I get into the details, I want to say: making it clear from the pre-order stuff and Viper and all that this is the FF9 expansion really is important. FF9 begins fairly bright and cheery and its aesthetic lends itself well to hiding what subject matter it tackles, but then it eventually starts dealing with a LOT of heavy topics--and Dawntrail is very much living up to that in my book.

Expansion Start

Going into this expansion I really had no idea what to expect. I admit that the 6.X patch cycle really threw me for a loop once DT was announced, and it felt kind of pointless to be doing so much with the void? I was like, “Why are we spending so much time on this, when we should be looking at things that are relevant to Dawntrail??” because none of it made sense to me.

One of the issues I had with STB for a long time was Lyse. Don’t worry, I’ve come around on her, but it took a while. The biggest issue I had was that the devs tried to take an existing character and turn her into something other than what we knew, and it threw me entirely. I think they learned the lesson from that, which is why the focus is on Wuk Lamat, a new character, and on Krile, an older character we know so that we feel more invested in what is to come.

Another aspect of STB that kind of threw me off was…how little focus it got after the HW story ended? Like we get two patches worth fo story to lead into it, and I 100% think the Ga Bu stuff is important, and obviously the Warriors of Darkness story is important to set up part of SHB, but…everything to set up STB felt…not there? And we meet Lyse properly during 3.55/3.56, just like Wuk Lamat. We don’t have time to get to know her as this new person before we’re dropped into STB proper. And that didn’t help me when it came to bonding with Lyse--it took until the Lakshmi trial before I realized how I was supposed to feel about her my second time playing through Stormblood.

Wuk Lamat won me over really fast, thankfully--she has a certain kind of charm to her that endeared me to her pretty quickly (she’s very Sora from Kingdom Hearts coded in my eyes), and I was quietly interested to see what would happen with her character arc going forward. To be frank, I was more excited about how much better my character looked in game than in the updated benchmark than what little of the story we knew! I also was more invested in Krile than anything else story-wise; she’s always been a low key fave of the Scions for me so it’s nice to see her be much more involved in MSQ this time around.

But then we hit the first city and actually got into the story. Tulliyollal is such a lovely city, and its inn room was the first to make me go “wow” since the Pendants (since the Baldesion Annex was fun but still feels way too cluttered for me). I loved meeting Gulool Ja Ja, and his vibe as a character was excellent. I was surprised by what the rite of succession was shaping up to be, but once you see the Saga monuments and hear the story behind them it pretty quickly clicks as to what the Dawnservant wants the claimants to the throne to learn about during the rite. That was when I rsaw the mentor-type role my character would play, and once I knew what role the WOL plays for Wuk Lamat and in at least the start of Dawntrail’s story, I was in. I was determined to embrace that role in a way I had issues doing when I played through STB initially for Lyse.

One other thing: I was super surprised by Zoraal Ja being the one Wuk Lamat was prioritizing as a threat, and that he was the one who couldn’t be allowed to be Dawnservant. I guess I’d been anticipating the aloof/stern but decent older brother from him based on what I assumed was one of his lines in the launch trailer, so that was a fun surprise.

Zones 1 and 2, first visit

Urqopacha absolutely blows Kozama’uka out of the water for me, but I think both zones do a pretty good job with their first of two feats.

I started with Kozama’uka. The HanuHanu felt straightforward enough, and their feat set Koana up really nicely for what exactly his views are. I was glad to hear that he and Wuk Lamat were on friendly terms right before we left Tulliyollal to start the rite. One of my first thoughts when seeing how he and Wuk Lamat both handled the feat was, “He’s not going to win the rite, but I want him to either be advisor to his sister or for her to invite him to rule together.”

Bakool Ja Ja was fine as the zone’s antagonist, the writers did a good job of setting up his rivalry with Wuk Lamat in the intro so I wasn’t surprised by him trying to cheat his way through things. Wuk Evu was also…um. Not my favorite. I wasn’t super into the “behead me for being rude to the Third Promise” joke being reused over and over and over again…but maybe that’s just me.

As I said, Urqopacha was by far my favorite intro zone for the views, the music, and the overall aetshetic. I really love FF10, so getting to spend so much time with the Pelupelu was excellent. I also loved the zone music and this part really was what got me hooked on this expansion. Working with Mablu to make trades for the saddle was such a great showcase of what exactly the player character is to Wuk Lamat, and really solidified how much I enjoyed her. She is SUCH an orange cat (meaning she is “no thoughts, head empty” in a lot of ways but also just impulsive and can be unpredictable) and I mean that in a very kind way.

This was also where we got to see so much more of what Zoraal Ja’s whole deal was, and once I spent more time hearing him speak I totally understood why Wuk Lamat didn’t want him to be Dawnservant. Also, Mablu is the best and my roommate/best friend who is the biggest FF10/FF10-2 fan I know cried when she saw Tobli (since he’s from 10-2 himself) and the music is so good. So yeah, 10/10 zone.

Zones 1 and 2, second visit, and First Trial

Jumping ahead a teeny bit (since you go back to the capital between these visits). I liked this second set of feats overall! It felt like we were finally making some good progress with Krile’s goals to find out more about the city of gold in addition to moving forward with the rite. I also liked jumping right back into zones we’d already seen instead of waiting for 5+ levels to go back.

I liked how the Moblin feat incorporated the Elezen goldsmith from the boat, and seeing once again just how charismatic and magnetic a personality Wuk Lamat is. Her ability to show so much empathy for people is absolutely her biggest strength, and her desire to understand things--something those helping her with the rite have helped her discover--really start to shine, at least for me. That’s what makes her such a great fit for Dawnservant.

Koana also really was a star in this zone, and I really adore his character archetype and the love he so clearly has for his sister. Working together to rescue Wuk Lamat after Bakool Ja Ja snatches her was a nice change of pace from what we’d had so far from the rite, and that was when my initial impression of what would happen with Koana gained a bit more strength behind it. I was about 90% certain at this point that he wouldn’t win, but would stay at Wuk Lamat’s side to help guide her when she needed it.

I LOVED seeing the Yok Huy and honestly just getting to go back to Urqopacha was a delight. It felt like SO much progress was being made for both the rite and Krile’s goals, and the dungeon was excellent. No notes.

As a quick aside, though, I loved that we got to hear the Yok Huy’s take on death--that those who have died will always live in our memory, and so long as that memory remains, they are not truly gone. I loved this because it fits so well with the lore I have for Rowan regarding the way the Echo manifests for him, and how he cherishes the memories of people he’s lost but has come to move on with his own life. It just…is a very good thing to nail home some of FF14’s broader conversations about remembering and honoring the past, but still turning your focus to the future.

I have gripes with the Valigarmanda trial (I wiped twice on Duty Support :( ) but I appreciated that Wuk Lamat, Koana, and Zoraal Ja ALL came together for the good of their nation. I also liked that Zoraal Ja was cooperating because people dying because Valigarmanda would be bad for his own goals in the end if he won the rite, and also it’s good to see more of him before Things Happen (™).

Zone 3

Basically from here on out I loved every zone.

As a person who loves food and specifically enjoys making food for others, the feat in Iq Braax was a delight. Given that we find out the clan’s leader is Wuk Lamat’s father, it is VERY fitting that the people of the village are much more on the nose about not directly helping the team-up between Wuk Lamat and Koana. In addition, the cooperation between the Second and Third Promises was very clearly there to show 1. how well they work together and 2. what it is that Koana still has to learn, which he very much does by the end of the zone.

I’ve seen in the Disc Horse (™) around DT that Bakool Ja Ja turn in the second half of the zone was weird, but I don’t think it was, not really. By the end of the instanced duty after the X’braal feat, he’s a humiliated mess. Seeing the added context for why the Mamool Ja are the way that they are in the second half of the zone and learning the true cost of the blessed siblings among them, you actually have a reason to offer empathy to a person whose whole life has probably not been great. Wuk Lamat putting aside her anger with Bakool Ja Ja to truly help his people is yet more proof of the things that truly make her a good leader and why she really is the best choice to be Gulool Ja Ja’s heir.

The end of Koana’s arc here is excellent. Wuk Lamat reaching out to him when she needs help finding a way for the Mamool Ja to find ways to thrive outside of the blessed siblings--knowing that he can succeed in an area that is not her forte--is yet MORE proof of her ability to see the best in others and understand their worth. And Koana is genuinely a great brother and partner to work with for her, as his generally calm demeanor evens out her boisterousness very well. The instanced fight against the shade of their father where both groups come together was EXCELLENT.

The end of the Skydeep Cenote and actually finding the city of gold is such a good way to close out the first half of the expansion. We’re left on more intrigue for what is to come in the second half of the expansion, and this was when I got the deep sense of “Okay. But when is the other shoe gonna drop”.

Midpoint, and thoughts on the first half of the expansion

I was so happy with Wuk Lamat’s coronation, and how she outright asked Koana to join her on the throne. Finding a way to truly be their father’s successors by embodying both reason and resolve works out so well in Tural’s favor in the end.

I think the only somewhat negative thing I can say here is that…I was totally thrown by the song that played when the stone monument was revealed, haha. The song is fine on its own, but it was SO weird for me to hear that it did actually kinda take me out of it. But otherwise this turning point for the latter half of the expansion was good. I wasn’t sure how to feel about MSQ going forward, though, because I was like “Wait, where’s the rest of it?”

In terms of my overall thoughts on the first half of this expansion… It’s very good as a way to decompress following the end of the Hydaelyn and Zodiark saga that ended in 6.0, and even a good way to relax after everything that happens with Zero and the void.

I know there’s a ton of Disc Horse (™) around this expansion, particularly about Wuk Lamat and the rite and how “slow” the first part is. I have two things that come to mind about it all: this isn’t the Shadowbringers or Endwalker of this next story arc. This is the Realm Reborn to the next arc. Things are definitely going to be a bit slow.

In addition…the WOL may not be the protagonist of this particular part of the story, but that doesn’t mean the first half and dealing with the rite is worthless? The WOL knows by now that they were Azem, the Traveler. Remember, the Traveler part of that convocation title? My BFF/roommate Sarria put it best:

“DT really feels like it's back to our "roots" and I mean like AZEM roots. Being The Traveler, visiting new places and meeting new people and learning about places outside of our known bubble. Listening to people's stories and desires and then being asked to help specifically *because* we listened to and learned from the locals. And I for one really really am loving it. The story doesn't have to be about us - just being there means we have a role. (Also the first half of DT isn't supposed to be about us anyway.)”

I find it so funny that people have such a problem with it--and I won’t lie, I do agree that some of it had slow pacing. But like…I don’t know, this really feels in line for what Azem would do. We are Azem now, we have the crystal and everything. We’re not known in this continent because it’s only been 70 years since the world we know made contact with it--to the point of the guy credited with discovering this “New World” IS STILL ALIVE. There is ample reason why your character is not the focus of the first half of the expansion, and it’s so disheartening to see people just…not get that?

It could be that my overall excitement to explore the new zones laid out before us led me to be much more forgiving of this section, but getting to know the people of Yok Tural was such a treat. I can’t wait for NG+ to come around for 7.0 so I get to explore all of this again.

Okay, back to going zone by zone.

Zone 4, part 1

So as someone who knows the Southwest US fairly well this zone was excellent, I loved the vibes. The overworld music is great.

I will say outright here that I’ve kind of been an Erenville disliker since his introduction in EW. He’s been overhyped for a character who up to DT basically had no personality in my eyes, so I was apprehensive about how this zone would go with him as our only companion. But, credit where it’s due, the writers actually got me to come around on him a little with the background we finally get for him. Not entirely, I still have issues with him, but he’s now more well-rounded.

Seeing the railyard workers actually made me cry, specifically seeing Not!Magnus’ wife. I’m so glad that 1: they were included and 2: explicitly shown to be the exact same as the people we know from the first. My roommate Sarria and I joked several times that this was SHB/Trolleys 2 and it was such a delight getting to laugh about it.

The end point for this visit to the zone was excellent. The dread had been building for me the whole time, knowing that something was around the corner, but no idea what. So the dome appearing and then the aftermath in Tulliyollal was anticipated, but about as brutal as I was expecting.

Tulliyollal revisit and Zone 4, part 2

The destruction of Tulliyollal and trying to aid those we could was done well, to me anyway. The devs handled that sort of thing pretty well in EW, so was glad to see it done again just as well.

Then comes the “cat”valry as I’d like to call it. Honestly, the moment I heard G’raha’s voice and heard Eternal Wind, it was like I could finally breathe. I think that’s the point of him and Y’shtola showing up to give you help for the rest of the expansion--they give a sense of release to all the tension and anxiety players might feel after the attack on Tulliyollal. A mini version of what the low-stakes rite of succession is to the story overall. You have to have a release for tension before building it up again, because building tension with no release just doesn’t work.

The truth of what the golden door is threw me for a loop, because I was NOT expecting it. I imagine it’s what people felt when the SHB launch trailer dropped and the truth about Hydaelyn and Zodiark was given--you’re so shocked that it’s a bit much to process. But I liked the revelations about the golden city and Krile and everything.

The revisit to Shaaloani was a delight, and deciding to blow up the train was exactly the kind of crazy I’d expect from the Source version of the trolley guys from Twine. The song that played during the coronation came back and it felt just as cheesy as before, but I think I’d accepted it by this point? I just let it happen even though it doesn’t really work for me.

And the Vanguard dungeon is SO good. I loved the music--honestly Soken popped off this expansion for the most part.

Zone 5/Second Trial

So I love the aesthetic of this zone in general--thank you for giving us FF10’s Thunder Plains properly this time!!!--but there was a zone where I ever felt like the story was loosing me, it was this one. I wasn’t sure what to make of the time bubble nor the regulators, so it took some time for Heritage Found to find its footing for me.

Sphene also was slightly unsettling, in a way? It was hard to put my finger on whether she was sympathetic or playing you, which I guess is the point.

Solution Nine kind of just…added to my sense of confusion. I was a bit lost on it all, and trying to wrap my head around it. It is also way to big and spread out for my tastes…but oh well.

With all the talk of souls, though, I finally understood why all the Void stuff with Zero in the 6.X patches was actually good to spend so much time with, since it was basically a primer for ALL of this stuff in the latter half of DT. So once NG+ is here for Dawntrail, I may actually start with 6.1 and see how it all flows together.

What finally got me back on loving the plot again was seeing baby Gulool Ja and Otis in the other half of the map, where the ruins of Alexandria are. I haven’t even played FF9 myself, only watched a very abridged playthrough, but the way I instantly knew who Otis was a stand in for made me feel so warm and comforted. Steiner is just so goofy and endearing, and Otis is exactly like him.

Was not surprised by Zoraal Ja making his move, but the cutscene for the defense of Tulliyollal was very good. I was surprised by Sphene both in and out of Solution Nine for that instanced duty, and I think here is where I really started to see the parallels between what I know of FF9 and DT. Sphene is Wuk Lamat’s mirror, at least in a way--loving and compassionate and charismatic (because I’d come to like her quite a bit by the point she outright says she was playing you). She exemplifies the extreme end of Wuk Lamat’s desire for peace, and the need to protect and preserve her people.

The fight against Zoraal Ja is a satisfying one. I am not the person to ask to talk about fight design or anything so will leave that to others. But I thought it was good.

Also liked the revelations after the trial, where Sphene turns on you for real. It did feel like downing Vauthry just to have Emet steal the Exarch again, though maybe not in the same way. Similar dramatic stakes, I guess I’m trying to say.

Zone 6, and the Finale

This zone will always have an interesting flavor to it for me, since I use the Living Memory title for personal WOL lore reasons. But the zone is, I think, such an excellent one for what the expansion as a whole is trying to say.

As I mentioned at the beginning, despite its cheerful colors and friendly looking character design, FF9 is a darker story. It deals with death and the existential. The perfect word to sum up FF9, from what I know, is bittersweet. And I think this zone--and in a way both zones and the city that comprise Alexandria--PERFECTLY handles that bittersweet feeling.

The weather is Reminiscence, bathing everything in this beautiful golden color. It’s full of areas referencing FF9--I recognized Alexandria and the Iifa Tree, but each zone is a call back to 9. The music is this soft, comforting piece that just triggered my nostalgia for a game I haven’t even played. Seeing Otis in his prime again, the tour of the Gardens with Cachuia, letting Krile meet her parents and learn her real name--it’s all so bittersweet.

Every time you turn off a terminal, you get that message of how nothing will go back to what it was. And the part of Living Memory that you shut down is then forever less colorful and lively, and there’s no music (at least when you’re there during this part of MSQ). You’re left with silence. We can always remember it like it was before (or use NG+ to bring it back if you were a dummy like me and didn't gpose there before it went away), but it won't ever be the same now.

I took my time in Living Memory before moving from area to area, and did all aether currents and quests as I could/they became available which only happened AFTER the zone was gone for the quests. So I was doing all this in silence. Left alone with my thoughts on it all and trying to understand what the point was.

Sphene is clinging so much to that nostalgia for a time gone by because of her programming, and it’s sad to have to end it. But to me, she is eerily similar to Emet-Selch: she was clinging to the memory of the dead, desperate to bring them back and keep them alive. But in the end, it was only an imitation that would lead to untold amounts of suffering to others.

All of Living Memory reminded me so much of Amaurot. Sphene letting the Endless explore as they pleased was I think a much kinder version of Emet's magic working on Amaurot, but I couldn't help but see the similarity there.

I did cry in this zone, during G’raha’s talk with the player in the gondola and all the interactions Krile had with her parents. And it’s just…sad. You might feel awful about destroying the Endless once you understand them and their ways, but in the end…they’re only memories of people who died long ago. Their lives continuing are coming at the cost of the future for everyone on the Source and the reflections. It just can’t be sustained as Sphene’s realm continues to grow and more and more is needed to keep things running.

Sphene wanted the best for her people, going as far as she did for them. And I like that she is clearly kind but does a lot of bad things out of love for her people, and the desire to preserve them. But in the end, she had to accept why death is an important part of life.

I loved the Alexandria dungeon, and the trial was excellent. I will say that the intermission was maybe a bit long, but I still liked it tremendously. I’m excited to see what the relic has in store for us, and where the new arc of the story will take us.

Overall thoughts

DT has two very distinct sections, and there are parts I think could be refined to maybe make things go smoother overall, but honestly? I am totally willing to overlook those things because I enjoyed myself as much as I did.

DT, to me, managed to deliver on the summer vacation aspect that was so heavily advertised while also keeping with FF14’s larger ideas about hope persisting in even the hardest of times, and why the connections between people are so important. It also continues to show why it is not just important but also good to remember the past fondly, but it is just as important to keep moving forward in the best interests of all people.

I said it in the part about Living Memory and the finale for DT, but Sphene is very similar to Emet-Selch, and while some of the Heritage Found stuff lost me for a bit, the story did hit its mark where it needed to. The ending zone was not what the Tempest or Ultima Thule were, and I’m glad that it’s not. I’m sad that I’ll have to replay on an alt or when we get DT NG+ to take the pictures I wanted there, but that’s the point. You’re supposed to feel a longing for something that you can never truly get back, and that’s one of the best parts about it. You’re left with this bittersweet feeling as you let go of the past, and these people who are long gone.

DT drove home Venat’s point from EW even more for me. To use Ardbert’s words from SHB, “Joy and sorrow walk hand in hand.” There is joy and sorrow all over the place in Tural’s story and in its peoples, and I loved how every minute went even if sometimes it did feel a bit slow. But not everything needs to be so fast paced, either.

And even in the slower-paced parts, the WOL is really embodying the adventurer spirit we’ve returned to. We’re embracing our Azem roots, and travelling to new lands and meeting new people and coming to enjoy their cultures and presence. That sort of thing is what Venat, the previous Azem, loved so much about the world. And getting to understand her sentiments a bit more was excellent.

All in all, while DT has its faults, I 100% think this a great expansion. I’m excited again to see what is to come from this story, when I was apprehensive at best after 6.X patch story.

[nayruwu]

Heyy~,

Are you still keeping up with the ONS manga?

If so, are you disappointed with the plot development of ONS?

ohh, interesting question!!

it's hard to answer, because my interests are so far off from what is actually happening in the manga right now. so i'm a lot more biased towards "ugh, this sucks" right now, but i'll try to work around it and really think of what bothers me beside the lack of my beloved scrunklies.

generally i think my biggest issue right now is how different the story today is to the events before. if you tried explaining to an anime only how the true villain of the story is actually a six-winged nonbinary hoe with depression that keeps their child's corpse in the hiiragi's basement, they probably wouldn't believe it's the same series. and i know that this was planned from the start, and kagami didn't just come up with shikama three weeks ago, but it still feels bad to have everything that was set up in the beginning of the manga not really matter anymore. they centered the whole start around the world ending, and it makes sense that there was never much worldbuilding because now it's just another thing that happened.

what were the interesting points back then? the apocalyptic setting! the ever looming threat in form of the vampires trying to enslave the remnants of humanity! the unshakeable rule of the hiiragi family suppressing those below them! there were tons of charming characters introduced that probably won't ever show up again (one of which even has backstory with an um, ex main character, i'd call yoichi. goodbye plot relevance). now none of that really matters anymore. it's a kind of "hey there's this bigger threat and bigger secret that renders everything that happened in the past meaningless!" that i don't really like. so what does it matter that krul dies and ashera loses her? they were angels in the past! their souls are bound together! they'll see each other again soon!

i'm not a fan of soulmate plots. i need at least 7 books of explanation for why these two characters like each other before i can see the relationship as true and meaningful. this is also why i can't bring myself to be interested in mika/yuu anymore, but i don't want to put a target on my back right now. they're good, alright. just not for me.

another thing that bothers me is how we're supposed to relate to, and perhaps even root for shikama. they were set up in both vampire reign and catastrophe as this incomprehensible force that planned the fate of the entire human race, leaving them as nothing more than figures on a chess board. and that's cool! that's terrifying! but shikama and the other angels turned out to be... not really incomprehensible at all. they're just humans with wings and special powers. to me, that's pretty underwhelming. maybe a different, more stylised approach to telling the story of angel mika would have made it easier to enjoy for me. something that wasn't just another version of "someone i love died and i didn't want them to so i did this thing". maybe that's the point, a cycle doomed to repeat, but... i don't know, i guess i expected something else.

so no, i don't like the recent developments. i can't think of anything i like about it, honestly. but that's a me problem. most people seem to like it, especially the mika enjoyers that have gotten their wildest dreams fulfilled these past few years! it's a little sad that my brain lost interest in him, i'd be a lot happier with the content we're getting.

this sounds extremely negative but oh well! i still look forward to the chapters and am excited to see what happens next, but without the thought of "hey, X scene has to happen at some point, it'll just take a while", i probably wouldn't be here anymore. i'll just wait for that and let the rest pass me by. yuu the floating eye, sure....

sure.....................................

sure...........................

[fandomsoda]

Obligatory SB Ruin first-impressions opinion piece

On its face, I do not like Ruin. It is not satisfying at all and simply opens up more questions in a very, VERY annoying way. And the few character moments I do adore about it are underutilized and short-lived. And that pisses me the HELL off.

Roxy and Cassie’s past and connection feel like an afterthought. It feels like it’s there to bait us, honestly. Like nothing came out of that other than an out-of-nowhere gutwrench scene that feels so cheap in hindsight. And Eclipse, god Eclipse (or as I call them when I don’t want to get canon vs fanon confused- Ruinclipse). Eclipse is great. I adore them, just like everyone else does. But there is not enough of them, not even close. In fact, I would rather have not gotten them at all because how DARE Steelwool make a character they KNEW would be fucking BELOVED and only give them like 3 lines of dialogue? And they’re great. Their voice in particular is fucking incredible. Kellen Goff KNOWS what he’s doing with character voices. But there was like none of them. And that angers me for OBVIOUS FUCKING REASONS.

My biggest gripe with Ruin is that it has things that are really fucking good, but there isn’t ENOUGH.

And don’t even get me started on how the whole mimic thing came out of nowhere and just brings up more questions and complicates things EVEN MORE. And now I am desperately digging for an un-before-discovered ending in feeble hope for SOMETHING, ANYTHING, that even vaguely SEEMS like closure or an actual fucking ENDING.

We have no background for anything, btw. We don’t know how Cassie knows Gregory, we don’t know where she came from, we know NOTHING about her.

This dlc sacrificed half-decent storytelling in favor of scares and gameplay and that is the exact opposite of what it should have tried to do. I consider Ruin a massive fucking step down from Security Breach as someone who loves Security Breach despite its flaws.

Ruin was not exactly boring like most critics I’ve seen claim, but rather the moments of excitement and good HAVE NO PAYOFF.

As it stands right now, I would honestly rather Ruin not have happened.

I will still post about it, and join in fandom hype, but not because of what it is. But rather what I know it could be. I say all of these things out of love. Because I love FNAF and I love SB and I love the direction it took, but god I hate how they have done nothing to enrich it with Ruin. This dlc honestly feels like a big waste of time. They focused on pleasing the gameplay-obsessed haters who wouldn’t have appreciated the dlc no matter what happened and completely forgot what was actually good about the initial game. And that deeply saddens me. I hope things get better. I hope whatever we uncover later gives closure, I hope there are things in the future, but as of right now this was a massive disappointment.

And honestly the bar of my expectations was barely an inch from the ground relative to the base game.

Edit: wow I sound angrier here than I thought I did when it was initially made. I promise I mean all of this in a “it’s so close to being great and I’m frustrated at how far it fell” way and this is not just me screaming “it didn’t meet a quota for the amount of things I like in it”. The lore problems are the biggest issue here (even though FNAF lore was already fucked but it’s never fun to see it get further mangled) it just specifically is extra aggravating how little of the exciting character moments we got if that makes sense.

[triviareads]

I'm curious what are your thoughts on the salacious players club series by Sara cate.

I have read Praise and Eyes On Me but none of the others. Would you recommend it?

I think it's overall a great series that also is a good introduction to kinky romance novels, though I feel like it peaked at Mercy (book 4) and the last two were overall duds. Here are my thoughts individually-

Praise is my favorite; it's a comfort read to me because it's such a well-done rendition of an older man/younger woman romance but with the added layer of kink (D/s, secretary stuff). It has the right amount of taboo (ex's dad) and the right amount of conflict because of the taboo aspect (Emerson's back-and-forth about wanting Charlie and him literally trying to shove Charlie and his son Beau together one last time before Charlie puts her foot down and tells him she wants him).

Give Me More is my second favorite because I really loved the evolution of Hunter, Isabel, and Drake's relationship; Hunter and Isabel are a married couple and Drake is their long-time friend. Hunter has this red-herring new kink awakening moment where he thinks he wants to be cucked and watch Drake and Isabel together, but that's not it at all. Hunter's journey in overcoming his internalized biphobia was actually really emotional to read, as was Drake and Isabel getting closer in the meantime. All three characters were likeable individually and had distinct voices which...... was not the case with Sara's other poly romance in this series.

Mercy is honestly tied with Give Me More; I love older woman/younger man romances, and this is even better because Beau's redemption arc from Praise comes full circle and I was actually rooting for him by the end. It's also really great to read him go from this aimless young loser to figuring out he's a sub and a *brat*, and also finding purpose (and reconciling with daddy lol). Maggie also comes into her own as a domme. I appreciated how Sara wrote Maggie's conflict as the only woman among the owners of Salacious; her feeling like she doesn't belong even if the other men are nice to her, seeing the tasks she often ends up with, and reading her irrational but understandable mental competition with Emerson was all very relatable.

Eyes on Me is a book I don't remember very well but I remember it doing the trick as far as fulfilling the itch for taboo (Garrett and Mia are stepsiblings) and novelty, because it's still pretty rare to read romances where the heroine is a sex worker, and in this case the relatively new profession of camgirl. The voyeurism of it all was very hot too. Also, I appreciated the plus-size/fat rep with this, as well as Praise.

Highest Bidder wasn't very standout to me because the romance felt trite; like yeah, he's a billionaire silver fox and she's a little white girl and he inevitably whisks away to Paris and makes her call him daddy. Sure. Sara tried to include this added layer of taboo where the heroine's mom and the hero were dating once, but it never quite worked because I don't think it was suuuuper serious, and he never actually met Daisy while he was dating her mom, I believe.

I think my biggest problem with Madame was that in a poly romance, you need all the characters to have equal weight and distinct voices, and unfortunately, Jade was the weak link, so to speak. I could barely discern a personality, and I do not think she had switch energy at all. I'm very cognizant of my biases when it comes to writing off female characters in romances, especially in poly romances, but genuinely, she was giving nothing. Clay felt like Beau lite and Sara half-assed his mommy issues and didn't go where I wanted her to go with him (mommy kink; I wanted her to go THERE), and so much of Eden's story felt boring for Surprise Reasons we were not informed of in the last 5 books.

[zoeywades-spouse]

You make a lot of good points there.

Something like TNA has very obvious gender coding errors, most notably when Paolo talks about how he's marrying Sofia to Sam because he wants her to be a wife and mother and he thinks women shouldn't be in the business world. Yet he's marrying Sofia to a female CEO? There's no amount of mental gymnastics you can do to make that work. And to add salt to the wound are other smaller errors like f!Sam saying the kids have been "without a mother figure" or that time when the kids called f!Sam "Dad".

On the other hand, I think a good example of male-coding that's a little more implicit is Reagan in Surrender. For the most part it probably is a bit easier to suspend any disbelief with female Reagan's writing and behavior. But when you see them say shit like "When a woman agrees to be my sub, she agrees to obey" it feels weird from the female version.

Granted that line has no place in this story regardless of Reagan's gender, but it feels like something that only a misogynistic abusive guy would say. It'd be one thing if they said "when you agree to be my sub you agree to obey" or "when someone agrees to be my sub they agree to obey", but to specify woman in it (even in the possible context that Reagan is into women only regardless of gender) adds a hint of misogyny to it that... doesn't feel right coming from a sapphic woman.

Similarly with Kit from Untameable. Their behavior for the most part felt gender neutral to me, but the way Austin treats their relationship with MC feels more suited for a wlm route. I mean, it's not completely nonsensical for the others and it's honestly terribly written even for the wlm route, but why the mlw route would not accuse him of being slutshamey or the mlm and wlw routes would not accuse him of being homophobic is a bit odd.

With an LI like Kieran though I feel like it's easier to suspend any disbelief. None of Kieran's behaviors felt like they'd be rooted in misogyny, plus it is a fantasy realm setting different from modern day earth.

The extra weird thing about gender coding for LIs is that sometimes it can make the f!LI routes more preferable. I have seen some people say Reagan's behaviors felt less uncomfortable and creepy when they were coming from the female version. And as a GNC woman myself, I far preferred the mlw routes for books like ID, SW, and TCH as they felt a little more refreshing, compared to how been-there-done-that they'd have felt in the originally intended wlm routes. But even then, although stuff like LI carrying MC or MC sitting in LI's lap aren't nonsensical with non-wlm to me, I do still want some stories where it's the wlm route that feels more refreshing than the mlw, y'know. I want to be the one holding the umbrella for the LI, or bridal-carrying the LI, or having the LI sitting in my lap.

I'm noticing a lot of these problems– both the actual male coding of f!LIs and the lack of variety in romance dynamics– do boil down to essentially PB being lazy. They just play it safe and rely on a narrow stereotyped view of who their audience is (genderconforming allocishet women) and what they think they like. They rarely if ever expand their boundaries– and what makes that tragic is the fact that they have shown to be capable of doing so every now and then. But for the most part, it's playing it safe 90% of the time.

Sorry for the long ask, I just have a lot of thoughts on this.

Don’t apologize for the long ask! I love talking about gender so thank you! 😊

I agree that TNA has very obvious gender coding errors that make it clear when PB wrote Sam they wrote them as a man. And you’re spot on that there’s a difference between Sam and Regan but at the end of the day their writing still comes across as them being male-coded.

I think the biggest problem with Untameable in terms of gender coding isn’t the writing of Kit themselves but how they write the other characters’ perceptions and reactions to Kit.

Austin is definitely way too overprotective when it comes to female Kit but my biggest gripe is how in rural Oklahoma everyone is completely okay with Kit being a player who has a history of hooking up with only women. And all the women publicly fawning over her too? It’s completely unrealistic and shows that PB didn’t even consider how this would be unbelievable when Kit is a woman.

Listen I’m all for more queernorm stories but this story isn’t queernorm because outside of female Kit and MC there is not a single queer romance depicted. So having everyone in rural Oklahoma know Kit is queer and having them all be okay with it and a bunch of girls fawn over her just shows that Kit was written as a man by PB.

With Kieran I gotta say I disagree with you there. Domestic abuse and intimate partner violence is rooted in the patriarchy and when the victim is a woman rooted in misogyny. Kieran kidnapped the MC and abused her. I don’t think having that be in a fantasy setting changes the gender roles in any way, not when they’re literally being abusive. Even if Kieran is a woman in someone’s story, that abuse is still rooted in the patriarchy and misogyny.

Furthermore, the Cursed Heart is clearly inspired by A Court of Thorns and Roses. This book series is ripe with misogyny, violence against women, and so forth. The love interest in that series is this dark, brooding man from the Night Court (yes PB used the same name too) who literally groomed the 19 year old main character, SA’d her, and kidnapped her. Yet his abuse is then justified by the author and he is turned into the romantic hero of the series.

So personally I think Kieran’s actions are rooted in the patriarchy and misogyny no matter if it’s in a fantasy world or not, no matter if they’re a man or a woman. Abuse is a lot more common in cishet relationships (and while it can obviously happen in queer relationships it’s not as prevalent and even then that abuse is still rooted in the patriarchy) and considering the inspiration behind the Cursed Heart as well I’d say that Kieran is male-coded.

And you’re spot on. The problem is that PB knows which people in their audience pay the most (genderconforming allocishet women) and writes stories for them. They don’t consider how the relationship dynamics are different when it’s a queer relationship compared to a cishet one.

PB has definitely shown that they’re capable of it. For example, when playing Guinevere I really at any point never picked up on the LIs being heavily gendered towards male or female. And I agree PB absolutely has the ability to write these stories and LIs with care and consideration they just choose not to. It’s all about money these days which is very disappointing

Thanks for the ask!

[appleciderp]

I got tagged by both @dismightyman AND @fornhaus, again, I'm in high demand as usual.

tea, coffee, or soda?

Depends on the situation. caffeine purposes? Tea. with a meal? a soda Gun to my head and I had to pick only one to drink for the rest of my life and would be allergic to the rest or wtv. Tea.

dogs or cats?

This is gonna get me kicked out of the cool kids club. I'm a dog person, through and through. I always said I was never gonna get a cat before Maple, and I'm convinced I will not get a cat after Maple. I like cats, I even prefer cats as patients. But I find that they really need a certain personality for me to want to own one. While dogs I would kidnap 99% of them if given the chance.

can you play an instrument?

No I cannot :) I already said the violin story in VC but I'll tell the flute story now! So I started drawing in 6th grade, but in 5th, you had to pick between art and music and stick with it until 8th grade. So I was stuck in a music class when I wanted to be in art, and I'm usually very averse to conflict when it comes to things like that. ANYWAYS. I chose a flute (specifically flûte traversière, but idk the name in English) and I was stuck with that instrument for 2 whole years. You may be asking at this point, how did you pass music class and not know how to play the instrument? I only learned the buttons to press whenever we had a test. During the few concerns I did with that Flute, me and the other girl playing flute legit did not play at all and just spammed buttons. The biggest concert we played was at the high school, and we chewed gum throughout. We were never found out.

what's your sun sign?

Saggititties. (both my sun and moon is Sagittarius)

first song lyrics that pop into your head?

I'm actively listening to music rn, so idfk. Lemme pause for a hot minute

"I'm an astronaut, baby I work in the night I'm a certain kind of crazy I live in my mind" - Keaton Henson, Career Day

do you have any tattoos?

1 so far. Canis Majoris on my inner right forearm, although it blew out and isn't really pretty. I do have 6 ideas on my "100% getting when I find an artist I like locally and have the money"

favorite place you've traveled

I've traveled decently, and I consider myself lucky that I could. Oddly enough, the spot I'd consider my favorite place is about 40 minutes away. I'm not gonna dox myself publically by saying what it's called because it's legit in the middle of nowhere. But there's a small run-down chapel and an old graveyard nearby, and a gorgeous view of the Bay of Fundy. It smells of sweetgrass in the summer. Whenever I go there I just feel at ease, like all my problems fly away. I've brought most of my favorite people there for picnics, but it's always nearly empty (except when there are powwows) Lemme grab the picture I took of Cedar when we went there last year!

what's the last movie you watched?

I genuinely don't remember? I don't watch movies that often.

you can hang out with one fictional character for an hour - who is it?

Honestly? None? Most of the fictional characters are people I would not interact with irl.

compliment yourself:

no <3

Since Mighty tagged Tav, I'll tag the rest of the VC crew: @empresscirque

@spookykittenwrites

@leathfaic (unsure if you want me to tag ur legit acct or not, so I'll stick with the CoD one)

[rookie-critic]

The Pale Blue Eye (2022, dir. Scott Cooper) - review by Rookie-Critic

The Pale Blue Eye sees Christian Bale giving a masterclass in acting in a movie that, otherwise, is just fine. I'm big fan of writer/director Scott Cooper, having seen and loved 2 of his earlier films, Out of the Furnace and Crazy Heart, but his last couple of films, while not bad, necessarily, have been disappointing. His last film, Antlers, felt content to idle its way through its story until it just, kind of, ends; never seeking to dive too deep into any of its very interesting characters enough to develop any true impact on the audience. The Pale Blue Eye also has this issue. A lot of the film isn't terribly interesting. That's not to say that the central mystery isn't interesting, because it very much is, which makes it all the more surprising that none of the investigation or surrounding story was very awe-inspiring or gripping. It had its moments of "oohs" and "aahs," but they were fleeting. I was concerned with how the story would resolve itself, but never too concerned to be more than passively invested. I will say the sets and production design of the film are top notch, and for a period piece (which I confess aren't necessarily always my cup of tea) I found the movie very visually engaging when the script and storytelling were lacking. The story also suffers from from a structuring problem. It feels terribly disjointed, and again, that meandering pace makes it feel like it drags in certain areas, but the biggest confusion comes in the form a very unexpected fourth act.

Our mystery gets solved at about the 90-minute mark. The whodunnit is resolved and we reach what anyone would conceivably call a final scene. Then the film decides that no, it's not over, but in fact still has 38 minutes left of its runtime. It's jarring at first; you really are stuck thinking "what could we possibly be using 38 more minutes for? Is this really necessary?" While I do think the movie's true finale feels a little out of place with the rest of the film, and the buildup to this moment is almost non-existent, I have to say that is also, by far, the best section of the entire film. The absolutely legendary performances given by both Christian Bale and Harry Melling (who is playing a very young, very green, and very Virginian Edgar Allan Poe) in this final sequence is genuinely more awe-inspiring than the entire rest of this movie and all of Antlers put together. Bale is in peak form, and every inch of his face is crawling with anger, remorse, regret, sorrow, and maybe even gratitude. Melling gives an incredible monologue and proves himself capable of keeping up with Bale, and the fact that Melling is taking up so much of the linguistic space of the scene makes Bale's performance even more impressive because he is somehow still the center of your attention, without even saying much for a lot of that final bit. There's one shot in particular (keeping it spoiler-free here) where the camera just lingers for close to 10 seconds on Bale's face as he looks forward past the camera, and his expression grows from complete disbelief slowly to sorrowful acceptance. I've had this issue with the last few movies I've seen of Bale's. He was practically the only good thing of note in Thor: Love and Thunder, and he was also the clear standout of Amsterdam, a movie that I would describe as "good, but not great." I love that he is the kind of actor that, no matter what he's in, he is going to crush it. I know I'm in safe hands with Bale even if the film itself is lacking, but I hope that soon he starts to fight in his own weight class again, because Christian Bale with a solid script is honestly something truly wondrous.

As it stands for this movie and its script, I'd say that The Pale Blue Eye is perfectly serviceable, but flawed, even without that final sequence. However, if the entire film had been as riveting as that fourth act, this may have been an easy 10, but I can't justifiably give it an amazing score like that based purely off of one sequence. Instead, I'll settle on a score of "could have been better" and patiently away Cooper's next film in hopes that it is as good as I know he is capable of.

Score: 7/10

Currently streaming on Netflix.

[the-insomniac-emporium]

RE8 Ladies + S/o with chronic pain HCs

Type/cause of chronic pain is kept ambiguous, but some of the hcs might seem geared towards migraines, since that's the main thing that I personally struggle with (and these are very definitely comfort hcs). Features Alcina, Bela, Cassandra, Daniela, Donna, Mother Miranda, and as a 'lil bonus Ava. Not particularly long, but the combined length of every character is enough to be put under a read-more (About 2,500 words in total).

Alcina:

It’s difficult for her to know that you are suffering, but be unable to deal directly with the source of the problem. Chasing off unwanted nuisances or hunting down threats to the castle was one thing, trying to solve complicated medical issues was another thing entirely. If only she could tear your condition asunder without tearing you asunder.

That being said, she’ll still support you endlessly, however she can. It doesn’t matter how expensive or hard-to-access possible treatments are. If there’s something you haven’t tried, and are interested in trying, she’ll find a way for you to get it.

The biggest, and arguably most helpful, thing that she does is set up a space for you within her office. She spends quite a lot of time there for her family’s business, but doesn’t want to leave you alone on bad days. So this was her idea of a nice compromise.

There’s a very comfortable sofa that folds out, a cabinet filled with the softest blankets, and several pillows of a few different sizes. Servants are instructed not to interrupt Alcina’s work without good reason, but she has a couple who ensure your snack cabinet is always well stocked.

If there are certain environmental factors to your condition, such as sensitivity to light and sound, she does her best to reduce their effects. Lights remain dimmed (or she’ll rely on candlelight), her music will be kept quiet enough to be soothing, and she’ll refrain from taking any calls while you are with her.

Bela:

To think that Daniela once tried to claim that Bela would “never need to know any of that (medical) stuff”! Sure, there haven’t been many people who have needed (and received) treatment from her, but that didn’t mean the skill was useless. Admittedly, she doesn’t know enough to replace one of your doctors, or try to create her own version of a cure, though no one really expected that much from her.

Still, she knows enough to help soothe your pain. Obviously there are different techniques for different kinds of pain, and she does research before trying anything specific. Bela’s also aware that you’ve been dealing with this for far longer than she has, meaning that you probably wouldn’t be pleased if she came in, acted like an expert, or assumed that you hadn’t really thought about the most popular remedies. So she’s tactful with how she approaches things, always checking if you’re familiar with a subject before she tries to explain anything.

Bela ends up surprising you with a lesser-known skill of hers: Massage. Studying anatomy has given her a decent idea of the body’s more sensitive spots, and the rest she’s figured out through her own, ahem, experiences. Regardless of where you’re in pain, your girlfriend can help reduce your suffering. Okay, well, if your pain is more internal than external, it’s a bit harder for her, but she can still help you relax.

One of her favorite things to do after giving you a massage is to just pull you in close for some cuddling. Preferably you’ll be in her lap, with her arms around your waist, her chin tucked on top of your shoulder. Then she’ll do her best to whisper you praises, reminding you how strong you are, and that she’s incredibly proud of you.

Cassandra:

She’s, uh, not great at this. At least not at first. Maybe she’ll never be more than good at it, though. But she’s definitely trying! And learning! By Jove, that’s something, right?

First things first, she’s always ready to try to distract you, primarily through kisses and gentle touches. Fingers softly trailing over your skin, lips tickling your neck, featherlight in all the right places… It’s not inherently sexual (though it can quickly go that route if you ask), just intimate. It’s harder for your brain to process pain when you’re also processing pleasure, so there is some science behind Cassandra’s methods, even if she herself isn’t entirely aware of that.

While she’s not great with words, there are certain things that she manages to articulate well enough. For one, she makes sure you know that you aren’t a burden. Taking care of you- no, helping you take care of yourself- is a labor of love, if a labor at all. More than that, she knows full well that you probably don’t like feeling pitied, or coddled. That, over time, being sick ends up being beyond frustrating. She never wants you to feel like your condition defines you, or like it puts any strain on your relationship.

That said, she’ll avoid telling her family any specifics unless you do first, and ensures that the staff know how to accommodate you (without telling them why, because it’s none of their fucking business, and she’s their boss, and for fuck’s sake it’s their job to do what she tells them. Maybe she gets a lil bit overzealous with it). At no point will she ever complain about helping you, or otherwise indicate that your needs are “troublesome”.

At the end of the day, the best comfort she brings you is her presence, simply being near you, endlessly loyal, tireless in her affections. Especially considering she gets clingier the worse your symptoms get.

Daniela:

Hope you enjoy cuddling. Seriously. There’s nothing Daniela loves more than curling up with you, and that goes double for bad pain days. Some adjustments will be made position-wise if you need, but she’ll still hold you as close as possible, for as long as you need. Although she might eventually fall asleep (because damn are you comfy), she’ll play with your hair or run her fingers along your scalp until she eventually dozes off.

If you want a little more from her than light snoring, or if she feels like going above and beyond, or honestly just if she’s thinking about how much she loves you (so all the effing time), she’ll do something she’s always loved in movies/books: Reading to you! She’ll pick special books that neither of you have read before, so you can experience them together on your sick(er) days. Which does, of course, mean that it might take months to finish even a single one. Surprisingly, Daniela won’t even briefly consider reading any without you. Even if the plot is really good.

But, uh, if you wanted her to read to you on a day where you aren’t bedridden? Hell yes, my friend, she’s absolutely down for that!

On days where she’s too busy to spend hours upon hours in bed with you, or days where her ADHD is just particularly bad, she tries her best to leave you with a “substitute”. AKA a massive fucking teddy bear, in a reddish brown color, with a green bowtie. Custom ordered (The Duke did not dare tease her for it). There’s a heart stitched onto the stuffed animal’s chest, which features your first initial alongside a D for Daniela.

Additionally, she has a blanket she only brings out for you, which she periodically sprays with her favorite perfume. That way you can hold it close when she’s not around, as if you were cuddling her. For her sake, though, don’t hold the teddy bear or blanket too tightly when she is around. Homegirl here will get jealous of inanimate objects, even ones that she gave you.

Donna:

“I think I have a tea for this…” Damn right she has a tea for this. Donna has a massive garden, with dozens if not hundreds of different plants, including a variety of herbs/spices. At least one of them has to be a little helpful for you. Whether it relieves pain, helps you nap off some of your misery, or just distracts you by tasting bloody-well delicious! Besides, few things make you feel quite as loved as holding a cup of freshly brewed tea in your hands, knowing your lover made it just for you. Like a hug in a mug, it is!

Similarly to Alcina, Donna will also try to create a comfortable space for you, but isn’t likely to put it downstairs with her workshop. Instead she’ll let you take over one of the larger guest rooms, customizing it to suit your specific needs. There will be some easy to care for plants for decoration (ones that won’t mind potentially missing out on natural sunlight), a couple relaxing paintings, and a shelf near the bed with things to help you pass the time, mainly books.

Furthermore, she’ll do her best to keep you company as often as possible. She’s naturally a fairly quiet person, so you won’t have to worry about sound if that’s something you’re sensitive to. While she prefers using a sewing machine, she’ll do things by hand while you’re in pain, just to reduce the chances of you getting irritated by the sound.

Speaking of potentially irritating sounds… by god can Angie be difficult to be around when you’re ill. Thankfully, Donna is perfectly understanding of this, and, as the only person Angie ever listens to, makes sure to give the doll a stern talking to about your health. To your immense surprise, it actually works. You’re not exactly sure what was said, but Angie certainly becomes a lot more compensating afterwards. She’ll keep her antics to herself, and usually even on another side of the house from where you rest, but only for as long as you’re tucked away in your room. As soon as you set foot outside, her restraints are metaphorically removed. All hell breaks loose (as is her universe-given right as the physical embodiment of both Chaos and Entropy).

Mother Miranda:

If the two of you weren’t lovers, there’s a decent chance you would completely misinterpret her actions. She might come off as irritated, like she has bigger concerns than your health, you fragile little human. After all, she is a goddess (well, practically). But the truth is that she’s aching inside every time you have a bad pain day, knowing that (for once) she cannot cure your ailment. Maybe if she had infinite subjects with the same condition as you…

But, at the end of the day, that’s the problem. There’s only one of you. One of her beloved, her little human darling, so dangerously fragile in comparison to the scale she works on. Even with all the time in the world, which she most certainly has, she cannot cure you without taking incredible risks. With your life at stake… It is a gamble she refuses to take. You are hers, and while she hates to see you suffer, the truth is that she’ll always be selfish enough to let you endure on your own.

That doesn’t mean she doesn’t help, though, just that she doesn't do a full-out experiment on you. Instead, she keeps notes. She’ll track your activities, bedtimes/when you get up, dietary habits, when you have pain, what you do to treat said pain, how effective the treatments are, etc, etc. All of this can be very useful in establishing patterns (a skill she’s gotten very good at, in her many decades of being a scientist), which can in turn lead to less pain days.

(For example, many people with migraines find that certain foods seem to trigger a migraine, or at least increase the chances of getting one. Though admittedly they don’t always end up cutting the food out of their diet. I mean, come on, you want me to give up chocolate? You want me to drink normal milk, like an adult? Kidding, kidding, I don’t have any food triggers. Nor do I particularly enjoy chocolate milk, nor do I dislike it.)

Moving on! While her work seemingly takes precedence over your condition, Miranda is not heartless, and she does do some things to lend you more direct comfort. Specifically, she tries to work in the same room as you when she can, normally while making electronic copies of physical documents, or while looking over the details of a finished experiment. She’s not always one for cuddling, so she won’t often get in bed with you during the daytime. But at night? Yes, fine, she will wrap her arms around you, maybe one of her wings too if you like how soft they are.

Just don’t think that she secretly loves every second. It’s not like she’ll spend half an hour whispering about how sweet and adorable you are as soon as you fall asleep, or anything like that. It’s twenty minutes at the most.

Bonus!Avaskian Caldwell:

“Oh, fuckin’ mood!” Followed by a solid thirty seconds of pure regret. Seriously, though, Ava has spent xer entire life (starting at age 10) dealing with chronic migraines. For a while xe also dealt with POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome), which meant lots of chest pain, but that (thankfully) faded as xe grew into an adult, as is fairly common with the condition. If anyone in Castle Dimitrescu understands unrelenting, unexplainable pain, it’s xer.

That being said… Ava never really managed xer chronic pain, at least not when xe was at xer worst. Xe had to drop out of school because of it. Hell, xe didn’t have a “real” job until xe was almost 23! Didn’t have a chance until things just calmed down for xer. So xe gets anxious whenever you talk about your health, worried that things are (or will at some point be) as bad for you as they were for xer. Other than that, though, you might initially think that xe doesn’t care, or didn’t understand the conversation.

Truth is, xe knows how absolutely fucking ANNOYING it can be to have to explain your health to every new person you meet (like the dozen different doctors you’ve met over the years, possibly every nurse who takes your pulse and thinks it’s a little bit high). So xe did a shit ton of research on your condition, in order to reduce how much you need to explain. Sure, xe will still have questions, and there are always aspects that only you can tell xer, but it’s a nice gesture.

As for helping you destress, xe’s pretty much a mix of Bela and Miranda. You’ll get plenty of massages (because Ava has learned from personal experience what sort of touches help with which sorts of pain), but also some scientific insight on any noticeable patterns. Lots of holding you close and telling you that you’re the coolest person in the world, and that Ava feels beyond lucky to have you.

[topazy]

Silent bloom

Pairings: Finn Collins/ Reader Bellamy Blake/reader

Warnings: swearing, and character death

Chapter: 2.03

"They want you. If we want a truce, we have to give them Finn."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Raven asked, stepping forward.

Clarke avoided making eye contact with any of you, "That’s their offer."

"That’s not an offer," you snapped. "That’s a death sentence."

"It’s punishment," Finn squeezed your shoulder lightly as he brushed past you. "For what happened at the village. Blood for blood."

—

Murphy walked towards where Finn was standing with a complex look on his face. "Hey, man. Byrne actually gave me a gun. I guess we really are screwed, huh? Look, we kicked their asses last time. We’ll do it again."

Finn looked at him blankly and said, "A lot of people died last time."

You chewed on your bottom lip as Bellamy and Finn continued talking, completely zoning out. Would the grounders really take Finn as a trade? The thought made your stomach turn. Your biggest fear right now was that someone would betray Finn and turn him over.

Hearing Clarke’s voice, you looked up again, to see Finn and Bellamy walking in another direction.

"Hey," Murphy said, stepping forward. "Any orders for me, princess?"

The blonde glared at him, "stay away from me."

You were surprised at the look of hurt on his face. "Just trying to be helpful."

It was obviously by the venom in Clarke’s voice that she blamed Murphy for what happened in the village. "You were with him at the village."

"I tried to stop him."

"Not hard enough!"

"You know, you want to start blaming people, Clarke?" Murphy stepped closer to her. "He wasn’t out there looking for me, was he? It’s not my fault he went batshit crazy."

He was out there looking for you.

You stepped in between them, stopping this before it went any further. "Enough! Both of you. Clarke, go do whatever it is you need to do. Yelling, and arguing isn’t helping anyone."

You watched Clarke walk away before turning to face Murphy, who looked slightly guilty. "What?"

"I…I didn’t mean it was your fault."

You shrugged, pretending his words didn’t strike a nerve. "Whatever, we have more important things to think about. Like how the hell we are going to save Finn."

"He’s a dead man walking," Murphy raised his hands defensively when you raised your brows at him. "What? I’m only pointing out the obvious."

You looked back towards the fence, and slowly walked towards it as the chanting got louder. You felt a lump at the back of your throat, as tears threatened to spill from your eyes.

Murphy stood beside you, "jus drein jus daun, Jus drein jus daun."

"Blood must have blood."

You looked back around to face Abby, and Jaha who were talking to some guards. "You don’t trust them, do you?"

"Do you?"

Murphy scoffed at your comment. Of course he didn’t. Nobody who has been screwed over by them should.

"Well, angel eyes, if we leave it to them, we are definitely screwed."

"Yeah," you agreed. Besides Abby, none of them would care what happened to Finn. "We’re going to need a miracle to happen."

—

"What’s the plan?" You asked, stopping beside Finn.

"The dropship."

Clarke shook her head. "You know that this is the safest place for him right now.”

"It isn't if they're turning on him," Bellmay pointed out. "We can protect him at the dropship until we figure this thing out. Grab your gear and meet at Raven's gate in five minutes. She’s already working on cutting the power to the fence."

Bellmay was right. Going to the dropship would probably be the safest place for him right now. It would also give you time to try and figure something else out.

"Okay," Finn nodded. "But nobody's coming with me."

You frowned, "of course we are. This isn’t up for discussion."

Clarke pressed her lips together. She still didn’t seem convinced that it was a good idea. "We are surrounded by Grounders."

"It will be easier if we split up." Noticing others starting to shout at a Finn you gripped his arm as Bellamy knocked the boy called Gruff out. "We need to go, now."

—

You nervously gripped the gun tightly, praying you didn’t make too much noise as you walked through the forest.

"I know I’ve said it before, but-"

"Shh," you stared at Finn wide-eyed.

He has been mostly silent since you caught up with him, and now wasn’t the time to start talking. You knew by the look on his face that he wasn’t going to let whatever was on his mind go.

"I was scared... when you disappeared. I thought I’d never get the chance to say I’m sorry, and I needed you to know that I love you."

"Finn," you stopped walking and turned to face him. "We have talked about this. None of it matters now, all that matters is getting you through this. We find a way to save you, and then we rescue Monty and Jasper, along with everybody else who the mountain men took." You let out a small laugh, "Who would have thought it would be grounders that saved me from them? "Ironic, huh."

"What were they like, the grounders who took you?" He whispered.

"Eh…good as far as kidnappers go. They gave me clean clothes, food, and water." You let out a sigh, "I was afraid they were going to torture me like they did Murphy."

“You have a soft spot for him."

"No I don’t."

For the first time in a long time, you saw Finn smile, "Oh my God, you have a crush on him."

Him teasing you reminded you what life was like back on the ark before everything went to shit. It made you almost forget when you were in the forest in the first place.

You shoved Finn’s arm playfully, "shut up. I just feel bad for him."

"You do like Bellamy though."

You shot Finn a look, "let’s not."

"He’s a good guy, he’d keep you safe. I’m sure of it."

"And who’s going to keep you safe from me? Because once this is all over, I have no issue raising hell if you don’t stop teasing me, Collins."

"What do we do after the dropship? Where do we go? You think the Grounders will just leave when they find out I'm gone? Is this the best way to help our friends inside Mount Weather? "

You gave him a sympathetic smile, "will figure this out."

The last thing you remember seeing is the horrified look on Finn’s face as a loud yelling came from behind you.

—

You let out a loud groan as you sat up. Looking around, you were confused. The last thing you remember was walking in the forest.

"Y/N," Clarke knelt down beside you. "Take it easy when you sit up. You got knocked out."

Of course you did.

"How’s your head?" Finn asked as he helped you stand up.

"Never been better."

"It will be another neat scar to add to your collection," Murphy shrugged.

You ignored his comment as Finn spoke to you in a hushed voice. "When you went down... I thought you were dead. Because of me."

"Finn," you say softly. "I’m right here."

"I’ve killed so many people."

You shook your head, "things that we've done to survive... they don't define us."

"What if you're wrong? What if this is who we are now?"

Not knowing what to say to comfort Finn, you pulled him in for a hug at the same time that Bellamy rushed into the drop shop. "We got company!"

"Oh fuck. We’re surrounded."

As everyone made their way to the outside of the ship, Bellmay stopped to face you. "I’m glad you're okay. You had me worried for a moment."

"Thanks. But honestly, I’m still worried."

—

"They’re not moving any closer."

"Staying out of range. Probably waiting until it's dark."

Murphy looked up at him, "If we hit them now, at least we'd take them by surprise."

You wouldn’t admit it out loud, but Murphy's idea made sense. You didn’t like it, but he did have a point. "The problem is, we don't even know how many of them are out there."

Murphy rolled his eyes, "I’m not hearing any better ideas, Daisy."

Raven stepped forward. "We’ll give them something."

Bellamy looked at her, confused. "All they want is Finn."

Raven looked away from the rest of the group, as her eyes landed on Murphy. "Finn wasn't the only one at the village."

"You can’t be serious! We aren’t handing anyone over to the grounders."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Raven, I came here to protect him. You were the one who wanted me to come." A hurt expression crossed over Murphy’s face. "You... That’s why you asked me to come along."

The brunette glared at him. "Enough Grounders saw him at the village. They’d believe he was the shooter."

"Sick bitch!" Murphy spat.

Clarke tried to calm her down. "Raven, you don't mean this."

"You know what they do to people?" you said, stepping towards her. "They want Finn, nobody else. We can’t protect him if we are fighting among ourselves.

Raven ignored what you said and pointed her gun towards Murphy. "They want a murderer, we'll give them one."

Hell no.

You shared a knowing look with Finn, before moving to step in front of Murphy. "Raven, this is insane! Put it down."

"Daisy, move out the way, I don’t want to hurt you. Murphy drop your weapon!"

"Raven, stop this before somebody gets hurt!" You yelled back at her. You knew deep down she wouldn’t actually shoot you, but you weren’t so sure about Murphy.

Ravenstill refused to lower her weapon, "I said drop it."

"Stop! Stop!" Finn pushed her hand down so the gun was no longer pointed in your direction. "We're not doing this. They’ve got us surrounded. The only thing we can do is stay. And defend this place. Murphy?"

"Yeah?"

"Go upstairs with Daisy. You two watch the rear. I'll take the lower level. You three, take the front gate. That’s the plan. All right?"

As Murphy walked ahead, you hugged Finn again, saying, "We’ve got this."

"May we meet again."

"We will." You pulled back from him, "I better go make sure nobody else tries to kill him."

"Yeah. Be careful."

—

When you joined Murphy, he glared at you. "Are you insane?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You stepped out in front of me! Raven could have shot you!"

Taken aback by his yelling, you shuffled uncomfortably. "She wasn’t going to-"

Murphy cut you off, "you don’t know that. Don’t ever do something like that for me again. Ever!"

You turned and faced the other direction, to avoid looking at him. Why was he so upset? You were only trying to keep everyone safe.

Hearing yelling, you quickly made your way towards the other side of the ship. "What’s happened?"

Bellamy looked at you with fear in his eyes. "Finn’s handed himself in."

—

You stood on the edge of Camp Jaha by the gates, squinting. Grounders were putting a large post into the ground. "What is that?"

"It’s for Finn," Clarke confirmed. "They want us to watch."

As others talked about what to do next, you noticed Clarke getting ready to leave. "What are you doing?"

"I’m gonna talk to the commander."

"Okay," you stepped beside her. "I’m going with you."

Bellamy stared at you both. "What else do you have to say?"

You sighed. "I don't know, but we need to try."

Raven stepped in front of you. "Give me your hand. If she won't let him go, kill her. Things will go crazy, and we'll grab you and Finn. Daisy, you and Clarke have to help him. I owe him my life."

Before you had a chance to say anything, Raven slipped a small knife into your hand.

—

As you and Clarke walked into the commander's tent, a grounder stepped forward and pressed a spear up against your chest.

Clarke seemed to know who the grounder was. "We are here to talk to your commander. Let us through."

Looking down, you noticed small drops of blood appearing on your top. The grounder has cut you.

"Let them pass," the commander said before looking you up and down. "You bleed for nothing. You cannot stop this."

As Clarke pleaded with Lexa to spare Finn’s life, you noticed Ada standing guard. When she noticed you walking toward her, she frowned. "You are here to beg for the traitor's life?"

"Finn’s my friend. He did an awful thing, something he can’t undo, but torturing him won’t bring anybody else back."

"He killed Zelda."

"I’m sorry…" you whispered. "It’s all my fault. He killed all those people because he thought they had taken me."

"You can’t save him, blood must have blood." Ada said harshly. "If you try to save him, all of your people will die."

Tears spilled onto your cheek. You turned to face the commander, "can I say good-bye?"

The commander paused for a moment before nodding. You were surprised that she was allowing you to talk to him, but you didn’t have time to overthink it. It was probably because of Clarke anyway. You needed to help him. You couldn’t let Finn die by the death of 1000 cuts.

You rushed towards Finn, and kissed him. "I love you, Finn, I never stopped."

"I’m scared."

You wiped tears from his cheek. "You’re gonna be ok. I won’t let you suffer." You kissed him once again, before showing him mercy. "You’re ok."

"Thanks, Daisy."

Stepping back, the only sound you could hear was your own sobs, mixed with Raven's screams, as you stared at Finn’s limp body.

Season two

[greensaplinggrace]

honestly THANK YOU for saying all that abt baghra bc i thought i was going crazy from not liking her??? bc i haven't read the books and only summaries of them on wiki and like. i dunno why ppl like her actually even in the show bc this guy, her son, is like "i wanna make the world better for us grisha" and she's just like "no." even tho he sees that she's MAKING HERSELF SICK from suppressing her powers! she's literally like in bed coughing in the flashback yet seem much healthier at the little palace. also like after everything, after her disapproval, after the fold, after centuries of waiting for the sun summoner.. he never abandons her. he makes sure she's cares for. he doesn't harm her. and i have to wonder if baghra has ever thanks him for that, for just not leaving her alone. like i dunno how im suppose ro believe aleks is a heartless villain when he still cares for his abusive mom like this. like has baghra even told her she loved him (honestly she reminds me of a classic emotionally unavailable asian parent but maybe that's just me). also im wondering if baghra ever told aleks that he had an aunt.. bc like.. now that u bring up her isolating him it's like hmmmm...

not at me being like alina... why do u trust the bitter old woman who literally beats u with a stick and verbally abuses u every chance she gets.. just bc she showed a bad painting... like.. pls use two braincells to see that who u figured out as his mother... is also using his protection..

like baghra could've upped and left with alina. but no. she stayed bc she knew she was safe under aleks's protection.

alsoim just impressed that after his first friend tried to drown him and harvest his bones... he didn't go into hiding???? he still wanted to make a safe heaven for grisha!!! HE STILL WANTED TO PROTECT GRISHA EVEN AFTER HIS GRISHA FRIEND TRIED TO KILL HIM FOR HIS FUCKEN BONES. like... this is the guy im suppose to believe is the villain???

honestly i feel like part of the reason why LB's plotlines seem so bad and disconnected (and sometimes outright racist but that's another rant) and why darkles is disproportionately more violent and villainous in the later books is bc she didn't expect the darkling to be so popular and wanted to stick with her guns of making him the villain. but also wanted the money from aleks's popularity. but like you can't have ur cake and eat it too.

Well thank you for sending this ask! It's very sweet and very passionate. I'm glad you liked my post! I didn't put as much thought into it as some of my others lol. I kind of just talked. But it was nice to be able to finally talk about some of the problems I have with both her character and the fandom/author's perception of her.

HERE is the post this is referring to, in case anyone's wondering.

👀👀 You've hit the nail on the head for so many things, here!

Baghra is extremely emotionally unavailable, basically to the point of neglect. She's also verbally and physically abusive, traits which I doubt were only reserved for her students and not her son. Baghra claims she would do anything to protect him, but I've known a lot of parents who have that mindset and yet still harm their children because they think it's "good for them".

Aleksander stays at Baghra's side for years, and even when they're opposing each other she's never too far away from him. Idk if you've read the books but he does eventually hurt her. And as much as I don't like Baghra, I think his actions were horrid. But I'm also honestly kind of surprised it took him so long lmao.

Yeah I mean, in terms of isolation, let's not forget that she never wanted to introduce him to his father, either. Baghra's sense of eternity clouds a lot of her judgments on relationships, which means she views most people as dust and therefore teaches her son to as well. The problem with that is that he's a growing child, and he needs those social and emotional attachments for healthy development.

I would bet quite a bit of money that Baghra has either never told him she loves him or she has told him so few times it's practically forgettable.

And everything becomes more complicated because so many of Baghra's actions are understandable because of her life and her history, but the impacts they have on the people around her, especially Aleksander, are permanently damaging. And the fact that that's never gone over in critical depth in the books or how it's glossed over in fandom is just very disconcerting. Like, acknowledging Baghra's failings doesn't mean we're excusing Aleksander's actions, it just means we're holding Baghra liable for her own. Which the fandom should be doing, considering she's the epitome of an abusive parental figure.

And Alina trusting Baghra over Aleksander is even more confusing! Especially in the show!! This is the woman who beat her and abused her and tortured her friends when they tiny little children (and who probably still does so now that they're adults). This is the woman who mocks you and harasses you and insults you on a regular basis. Why does Baghra revealing she's Aleksander's mother make Alina change her mind?! Like fuck, I'd just feel bad for Aleksander. No wonder he kept it a secret, I would too! And that painting is enough evidence?! Really?! A random painting shown to you by this abusive mentor that's been making your life hell. That's what you're going to betray your new lover over?

The friends trying to harvest his bones thing is a good point, too. I think Aleksander, especially show Aleksander, is incredibly idealistic. I think he cares too much for others - those he's deemed worth his care (a sentiment given to him by Baghra). Despite everything she's tried to teach him about hiding and abandoning others and never caring and never doing anything to help or reach out or connect with people, Aleksander still continues to do so. It's likely because he never got it from Baghra growing up, and so is desperate for those emotional needs to be fulfilled elsewhere.

His turning point, when Baghra tells him it was understandable that those kids tried to kill him because the world is such a hard place for them - that's crucial. And the reason it's possible as a motivating factor is because of that idealism and that desire to help and that desire to be everything his mother isn't. Baghra tells him this trauma he just experienced was because of the oppression of his people, and instead of following her lead and accepting that, going into hiding and abandoning everybody to their misery, he goes I can do something about that. I can make it so this never happens again. Which is usually how trauma like that combines with one's core personality traits at a young age, especially when there's none of the essential support systems in place to aid in recovery (ie, the role Baghra should have been filling but wasn't, because she decided to exacerbate the problem instead).

And yeah, one of my biggest problems with the ham-fisted "beating you over the head with a sledgehammer of evil deeds" look-how-bad-this-character-is! portrayal of the Darkling in the later books comes from the impression I get that Bardugo doesn't trust her readers. She's so desperate to have us hate this character and think him an irredeemable villain, not trusting any of her readers to engage critically with a morally gray character, that it feels quite a bit like condescending fucking bullshit. Which ew, I know how to engage with literature, thanks.

She really does seem to look down on a large part of her fandom, and imo, the infantilization of the female characters in her books seems to carry over to her impression of most of her female readers as well. Which is why the Darkling's character arc gets fucking destroyed. But he's still a good cash grab, of course, so she'll shake his dead corpse in front of the fandom for money every time she wants something from it.

Also! Another reason I think her plotlines feel disconnected (I'm sorry Bardugo I respect you as a person, but shit-) is because the writing in SaB is just bad. I mean, nevermind the absolutely nauseating implications of the way she portrays the Grisha as a persecuted group who's situation is never actually fully addressed as it should be, considering Grisha rights is what her main villain is fighting for (imo for a series called the Grishaverse, LB seems to be pretty anti Grisha), but her characters and story alone are just wrong for each other. They don't fit together.

And the ending is one of the main pieces of evidence in that regard! You can’t say the ending where Alina isn’t Grisha anymore is her “going back to where she started” when she’s always been Grisha. She just didn’t know she was Grisha because she denied that part of herself that she was born with.

Alina is reluctant to move forward or change, she struggles with adapting, and she’s very set on the things she’s grown attached to throughout her life. She also has some latent prejudices against the Grisha, and so denies the possibility of being Grisha for those reasons as well.

Alina’s lack of powers in the beginning of her life because she willfully doesn’t learn about them to avoid change versus her lack of powers at the end of the book when she’s accepted them and then they’re stripped away from her by outer forces are two entirely separate circumstances. You can’t make a parallel about lost powers and lack of Grisha status bringing her back to the start when she was always Grisha and she always had powers and she simply refused to come to terms with it because of personal reasons.

The first situation is an internal conflict that indicates a story about growth and a journey of self acceptance. Denying herself the opportunity to learn about her heritage and to find acceptance with a group of people like her because she’s tied to the past and because of the way she was raised is the setup for a narrative that tackles unlearning prejudice and learning how to connect with a part of her identity that was denied her and learning how to grow independent and self assured. It’s the setup for a different story entirely. The second situation is an external conflict that centers around the ‘corrupting influence of power’... for some reason.

In a world where Grisha do not have social, political, or economic power and they are hunted, centering your heroine’s journey of self acceptance and growth around an external conflict about... the corrupting influence of power (in a group of people that don’t actually have any power?!) just doesn’t work. It is literally impossible to connect the two stories Bardugo is trying to push in Shadow and Bone without seriously damaging the main character’s developmental arc.

The only way a narrative like this would work, claiming that she has gone back to where she started, is either a) if the Grisha weren’t actually a persecuted group and instead were apart of the upper class, or b) if the one bad connection between the two instances is acknowledged - that Alina denied a part of herself crucial to self acceptance and growing up, and that losing her powers at the end has also denied her. It is a tragedy, not a happy ending.

Alina suffered because she didn’t use her powers. She grew sick. It was bad for her. This was not a resistance to 'the corruption of power and the burden of greed', it was her suffering because she couldn’t fully accept herself.

Framing the ending as a return to the beginning can’t be done if you don’t address how bad the beginning was for your main character. You brought her back to a bad point in her life. You regressed her. This should be a low point in her arc. It should be a problem that’s solved so she can finish developing organically or it should be something that is acknowledged as a tragedy in it’s own right, for the future the world (the writing) denied her.

This is a ramble and it makes no sense and I’m really sorry, but my point is that Bardugo put the wrong characters in the wrong story. The character arc required for organic development doesn’t match the story and intended message at all. The narrative doesn’t fit the cast. She's got two clashing stories attempting to work in tandem and she ends up with both conflicting messages that fans still can’t comprehend in her writing and an ending that doesn’t suit her main character to such an impossible degree that it’s almost laughable.

So yeah, there's a few reasons why I think the story and the plot feels so bad and disconnected. I hope you don't mind me making this answer so long! 😅 I was not expecting to write this much.

[lovee-infected]

I love your characters analyses and I agree a lot with them!My favorite is Kalim and while he's an angel, the way most people go "Dumb innocent baby who is naive to the way of the the world uwu" kinda irks me haha. Yes, he's an airhead most of the time but he's much more perceptive than he looks (he knew about Jamil nature all along) and can use his head and put in hard work when he thinks it matters, aka helping and making other people happy (his dorm uniform and scary outfit story) (part 1)

PREACH ANON, PREACH!!! The truth has been spoken 👏👏👏 That was amazing and you almost said anything that I meant to say! Characters and even real people who have the same personality as Kalim are often mischaracterized/misunderstood, mostly because people don't know that kindness isn't equal to stupidity. Almost anything that was needed to be said is already here so I'd just go through some of the details to complete it:

(1) Kindness ≠ Stupidity

Honestly...this isn't just about twst, it's about real life. These days many who are just sweet, generous and caring toward others even as they know that they're being abused because of their kindness, are called naïve and stupid. Look, many times they do realize that not everyone around them are worthy of their kindness, but they'd continue to treat them nicely, because it's in they're nature to be kind nonetheless, and this purity and genuine kindness is the worthiest thing one can ever ask for.

After chapter 4, Kalim did understand that Jamil had never been the person he was thought he was, he didn't even consider Kalim his friend. Jamil is still rejecting him but Kalim doesn't care, he even thanked Jamil after the fairy gala event for dancing with him, because it reminded him of the times when they played as children. Someone like Kalim would never forget anyone's kindness towards him, no matter what happens or how things change through the time. If you think about it, we all need someone like Kalim in our life.

Accept it, no matter who we are or how different our taste in people might be, we'd still appreciate an ally like Kalim. Someone who'd care for you and your problems no matter what it is, even as he can't help he'd try his best to at least make you feel better. He accepts criticism and won't fight you even if you call him useless and dumb (Just like when Jamil blamed him in the end of chapter 4), yet he'd still try to befriend you and do his best to support you through obstacles. This will to help people whom he cares for regardless of what they think of him or how much it may trouble him is an absolute treasure, just how many people can be like Kalim?

(2) Kalim shouldn't be compared to Jamil all the time!

A really common way of mischaracterizing Kalim is by comparing him to Jamil all the time: "Jamil is quiet, Kalim is talkative" "Jamil is cold, Kalim is warm and friendly" "Jamil is talented, Kalim is not" "Jamil is thoughtful and wise, Kalim is careless and stupid"...

I agree that Kalim and Jamil are different in some ways, but it isn't okay if we're going to compare him to Kalim whenever we're talking about him! Do we mention Jade or Floyd whenever we're talking about Azul? Do we compare Vil to Rook everytime we're talking about him? See, Kalim and Jamil are two separate characters. No matter how different or close they are, it isn't okay to consider them as nothing more than opposites! Both Kalim and Jamil have independent personalities amd we we don't have to mention Jamil whenever we want to talk about Kalim! His existence isn't bound to Jamil's and he's got a lot we can talk about other than his relationship/differences with Jamil.

(3) His generosity tells us a lot

You may wonder, why is he so generous anyway? Giving up on golden peacocks and diamond stones for friends and even strangers without caring about the financial loss isn't such an easy thing to do. Well let's imagine being on Kalim's shoes for a second:

You come from an unbelievably rich family, and ever since you can remember everyone around you has been treating you like a prince because of your father's status and money. Everyone around you is supposed to respect and treat you like a royaland you can buy anything you can ever wish for, you've got no financial boundaries. But on the other hand, you know that almost everything you've got around you is because of money: fame, wealth and many of your friends.

And if you one day lose all the money you'd once got, what is going to happen to you? What should you rely on? Who will ever even care if you're alive or not if the money that held all of your power and clout is gone? Also, even as he's rich, there are still things that he couldn't ever buy with money. He did say that sometimes he just feels so alone several times, then quickly changed the topic into something interesting and bright. Maybe he does want people to know that he as well sometimes goes through the pain and loneliness, but doesn't want it to seem to dramatic therefore he'd just quickly mention it to let it off his chest, then starts to talk about something else.

That's much and less of the reason behind Kalim's personality, he wants to use his money and attitude to gain what he can't buy with money: Friends. That's right, many of his friends might already be around him just for money, right? But it doesn't matter, he's got enough of money to keep them all satisfied. And if satisfying them is all it takes to keep his friends around him, he's all fine with it. He doesn't mind hoe expensive it might be, as long as he'll get to have nice friends he cares for around him he's alright.

THis generosity with money has found his way to his personality and attitude as well. His nature gravitates him into trying his best to help people out with all he's got. Kalim on his own is one that can get to have hid problems solved easily, there's always someone there to do it for him so he never needs to worry about anything. Perhaps he wants others around him to feel the same? If he had someone to take care of him whenever he needed to, then everyone else as well deserve to be helped out through difficulties just like Kalim was.

(4) We should all try and see through him!

Lets take a look at Kalim's background: Growing up with legit LOTS of siblings, he surely didn't get the attention and family love he deserved to have. Have you ever considered why Jamil was always so important to him while he could've been this close to any of his brothers? Well, that might be because none of his family members wasn't ever even close to being that close to him. Jamil isn't his brother, but Kalim does consider him his brother and best friend, which is somehow showing that even his own family haven't done as much as Jamil has done for him. He could've been poisoned or assassinated at any second, how does it feel growing up in an environment where you know many people already want you dead? Also, have you considered just how insecure and skeptical he coul've became because of having such a fearful past? At this point, someone wit his background might not even dare talk to any of other students let alone making friends with them! Almost any of us could've had trust issues if we'd grown up in the same environment as him!

Come to think of it, you'll see that Kalim is also pretty similar to the well-known hero Naruto! Naruto used to be looked down on because of his lack of ability yet he never gave up, he had a stunning will to turn his enemies into friends, he was considering and never gave up on Sasuke no matter how many times he hurt and turned his back on Naruto, and he never gave up on his goal no matter how many times he lost.

Kalim as well still has a lot to learn to improve and become a stronger magician, and he has strated to work his best and try to improve! It might not happen as fast as we may expect, but someday, maybe he as well would be strong enough for Jamil to be considered his rival and friend.

Another interesting fact to point out is their sense of humor, both Narto and Kalim can be careless at the time and sometimes mess up, and they also have a thing for sometimes laughing at their friends' mistakes (Not in an offensive way) all though they're the one to mess up most of the time. Like the times Kalim laughed at how bad Ace and Deuce's performance was, then decided to teach them how to dance with the help of Jamil.

Just would've been improved much faster if his goal was to be a great magician, but the main difference between Kalim and Naruto are thirs goals. Becoming a great ninja was Naruto's biggest goal, while Kalim's greatest goal is to be a good and supportive friend for everyone around him. Keep something in mind about Scarabia: It's true that Jamil, the vice dorm leader is in charge of most of the tasks and managements; but Kalim's presence is just as necessary for the students! Students need someone understand them, listen to their messenge and care to solve their problems like a friend! With Kalim's sympathy and Jamil's management, Scarabia students would have the chance to improve their best for the sake of their dorm and their very own future. (Though there needs to be some changes, Kalim should be a little more serious in general and Jamil needs to be more considering, but if Kalim and Jamil learn to work as a team Scarabia would stand higher than many of other dorms!)

For real, this is a school of villains and Kalim is much of a great exception to be in this school. He's legit the nicest character in the game and even MC had plenty of great memories with him back in the Chapter 4. This precious boy doesn't deserve to be called stupid or naïve while all he's been doing so far was to bring everyone including us the players a wonderful time and sweet memories...we need to understand him much better💔

[astaroth1357]

Unpacking the Angel Event (Through My Own Perspective)

Okay so uh… this was a very uncomfortable seat the Devs have offered us today and like all things that give me moral uncomfiness, I HAVE to analyze it. Blame the ethics classes. A full disclaimer, this is not spoiler-free and is pretty much entirely just me unpacking my own feelings here. What may bother or not bother me could really affect you and there is nothing wrong with that. You are entitled to your own perspective. This is just me trying to walk through all the stuff in this event that just… rubbed me the wrong way. So let's get to it.

The Costumes

So. Let's start at the beginning. Diavolo apparently had the bright idea to put everybody in magical costumes of their angel forms (or something like it in Satan's case). This is… problematic.

The reason the brothers lost their angel forms was because they fell after the Celestial War… who's greatest causality (in their eyes) was their sister, Lilith. So one could imagine that their memories as angels aren't particularly happy ones… By this point in the "continuity" (this is Post-Attic, more on that later), they would have known that Lilith didn't actually die which may soften something like this a little. I dunno, I'm not one of them and trauma is uniquely personal to the individual, but the bigger issue is that Diavolo thought this was a good idea to start with to which I say! - I'm not at all surprised by that. Hear me out.

Diavolo is heavily implied to have had a huge ass crush on Angel Lucifer. He's also uh… probably a little sheltered (as sheltered as the royalty of Hell can be) and probably not used to think of his subjects' feelings on the things he does before he just does them. This is fairly evident in other events where he'll order the brothers to do XYZ task even if they want no part in it. It doesn't surprise me at all that Diavolo would want to see them (Lucifer) as angels again and not take into account how that could affect them. I don't think that'd be malice on his part, just shortsightedness, and he likely would have apologized if any of the brothers expressed an emotional problem with it to him directly.

Do they have problems? Yes. But since the event kind of wipes them of their true selves, that's better discussed elsewhere. Moving on.

The Bangles 

Holy fuck, how do we even approach this? So Simeon, in conjunction with Michael (probably, at this point I have to wonder if he's telling the truth about this) gives the brothers jewelry, presumably to wear to the party, that would… I'm not even sure. Curb their impulses? Force them to be mannered? The important thing is he did not tell them about that little detail before they put the bangles on…

This is… also problematic. First, we can try to establish Simeon's intentions versus what actually happened: 

The bangles were (likely) intended to be removable. It was the mixing of the magic that locked them in place so we can assume he didn't mean this to be a permanent change.

The magic on the bangles was probably amplified by the angel costumes. What this means is though we can assume that Simeon never intended them to become quite so… different, we'll never know just how much influence he was actually trying to put on them. It could have been anything from suppressing their sins to full blown force you to say please/thank you. We'll just never get to know now… 

I won't be the first person to liken this to mind control (nor the last) because… that's kind of how it turned out. Even worse still, it would have been completely involuntary on the brothers' part. Simeon DID NOT tell them what the bangles were going to do. Now, he claims later that he would have eventually, but we don't get to know when that would have been. I presume at some time after the party, because like. These are our boys. They're not going to consent to wearing something like that, they're just not.

This poses all kinds of questions and problems ranging from issues of consent to anatomy and even the worth of good deeds done out of obligation vs. free will and… I mean quite literally when I say Jesus Christ, Simeon, what the hell?!

I could write a completely different post debating whether or not what Simeon did actually had any moral merit but I won't because it'd be very dry and boring. I think the most interesting thing to take away here is that Simeon thought it was okay to do like, at all, and with approval from Michael (maybe) no less… That reflects something on angel society that I doubt will get explored but I need to ponder farther…

This section is all kinds of sticky so we need to move on.

The Development(?)

First off, to new players, don't worry this probably isn't canon (at least to the main story continuity). The Brothers should be back to normal in the new chapters and this won't have a long term effect on anything (aside from maybe a tie in to the next event ala Beach event-> Games). That's how Obey Me has always treated their events it seems and I sure hope they stick to it now. But, these are still the same characters going through a unique situation and that can offer some insight so… Let's discuss.

I mentioned earlier that the brothers had problems with this… Unfortunately, I think we only get to see Lucifer and Satan's thoughts in any detail because everyone else is too far gone by the time we reach them… Lucifer can pretty much be summed up as troubled and unhappy because (you know) not a lot of great memories as an angel. I presume that his wounded pride after the fall may also contribute. 

Satan is… more complex. I’m honestly more bothered by his change than anyone else’s because even he expresses how weird this is for him... (We get confirmation that he never in fact had an angel form, btw). Poor baby is going through a full on identity crisis and there’s a certain part of his mind that he’s not even allowed to use right now... Anger. The Avatar of Wrath, born from Wrath, can’t get angry and… Something about that just bothers me at a deeper level, not even I can express properly…

Everyone else is too far gone once we reach them. Their personalities are completely different and they can’t even acknowledge that’s the case. They think that they’ve turned a new leaf but we know that’s not the reality, that leaf was very much turned for them and it doesn’t make anything feel any better…

This may be my own opinion, but part of me thinks that this portion (and only this portion right here) was actually what the Devs were going for. They wanted us to be uncomfortable by all of this for like, story reasons. It’s a narrative trick. Think of the phrase “You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.” I think they were trying to use the absence of the brothers’ usual flaws and traits as a weird way of celebrating them. Kind of like saying, “We could have given you guys these perfect brothers, but they’re not perfect and we know that’s why you like them. Look at these perfect guys, doesn’t it feel wrong?” The answer is, yes. It does feel wrong. And under other circumstances, it would be affirming like they’d be intending, “I don’t want this emotionally-open non-otaku, give me Levi dammit!” But when you add this intended discomfort with the already sketchy way we got here it just makes it all the worse… 

And absolutely NONE of this is helped by...

The… End?

I think the thing I hate about this event the most (actually legitimately hate) is how it ends. In that it doesn’t. It kind of just… abruptly stops right after Lucifer starts coming to himself again. Though I suspect that’s because they’re putting incentive into getting the event cards, this in NO WAY does the narrative any favors.

Most people are not going to get those cards. Even with Lonely Devil as an option, it’s a huge time/resource commitment to get there. Because of that, the majority of people are not going to get to see the aftermath of what happened. We don’t get to see how the brothers feel about what happened. We don’t get to see if they do, in fact, come to and if they have any takeaways from the experience or if they’re utterly disgusted by it. The player character doesn’t even get the option to comfort them after something that was probably terribly traumatic. It. Just. Ends.

What that means is all of that discomfort that we had just lingers… There’s no resolution or pay off. It just… stays… This is the worst possible thing they could have done. If you want your audience to feel uncomfortable, that’s one thing, but unless you’re telling like, a psychological thriller you gotta settle them back down again! Deep moral conflict is not a turn on!!!

Personally, I don’t hate that this thing exists. I don’t. The part of me that majored in Philosophy loves analyzing media like this so I can’t say that I didn’t get anything out of it. I don’t think all media should play it safe, it’s okay to leave the audience with no good answers or a feeling of unease, but you really got to be self-aware of it. The biggest flaw of this event, in my opinion, is that it rarely comes across as self-aware of its own horror. You get a very brief glimpse of it from Solomon when he comments on how creepy things are, but Simeon’s happy. Diavolo’s happy. And though he’s a little uneasy, Luke’s pretty content, too. Add that to the abrupt ending and we never get to know if ANY of them realize how awful of a thing this was to do to the brothers... It makes it all come off as an endorsement of mind controlling your friends into better people and (to me) that feels really, really wrong.

So in conclusion… I dunno. If the next event isn’t something along the lines of “Angelic Demons Part 2: Fixing What We Fucked Up!” then I think they really botched this one guys… I hope somebody was taking notes.