#honestly i needed this to be said bc im still confused

[simpel-is]

honestly this post, esp the part at the beginning, had me thinking

i had to go through a culture shock knowing how apparently slurs are more normalized in america (whether in bigotry or otherwise), how they're said everywhere in certain parts and apparently its "either you care or you dont" which is sort of a simplification of reality but its just shocking to me that straight, cis people can throw around slurs with little to no consideration of the outside world (the most prime example are group chats with guys, and im still conflicted on that)

bc the world isn't america. in asia its fucking rough. i still freeze and flinch when someone says the f slur (unless ik them to be explicitly queer), i still roll my eyes when someone calls someone else gay in a sort of playful degrading manner, because i focus on the degrading part

i still hold firm the belief that slurs, especially queer slurs, shouldn't be said by people who don't know or haven't experienced the full extent of our trauma. im jealous and can't comprehend how those people can say those slurs without flinching, without consideration of the word's history and how it's been used and how it's STILL being used in the world to degrade people like me in other parts of the world

im in a discord server with lots of americans, and i see them joking about shit like saying the n word, calling each other gay, throwing around the t slur, that type of shit, and i look in confusion bc i cant tell if theyre being ignorant, normalized bigotry or secure knowing they say that shit without any malicious intentions

when people throw out queer slurs, in my experience at least, queer people stay silent. they throw a blind eye, and i can't tell if it's because they don't care or if they're too afraid to say something

The Knowing: Being Queer in BL

I’ve been talking about The Knowing a lot lately with @lurkingshan @waitmyturtles @ginnymoonbeam and @shortpplfedup and so I felt it was time to gather all those thoughts into one place.

I define The Knowing as “growing up and suffering with the knowledge that you are queer (specifically that you are not like other kids) and understanding that you must keep that knowledge to yourself.”

Part of what initially drew me to BL was how often many of these shows took place in what @absolutebl calls “The Bubble” where cultural and structural homophobia is less prevalent or nonexistent. Many of these stories are about guys learning something about themselves for the first time when it comes to being attracted to other men. However, I always find myself drawn to the characters that clearly Knew who they were a long time ago. What’s interesting about these characters is that many of them carry an intense sadness and loneliness that plagues them and their relationships.

I am in my mid-30s. I’ve had to unlearn a lot of language over the decades. When I first realized I was different from other kids I was eight years old. I was a lot like Chiron in Moonlight (2016) asking the question, “What’s a faggot?” I wish I’d had someone like Juan around to say, “A faggot is a word used to make gay people feel bad.” To which Chiron asked, “Am I a faggot?” and Juan quickly corrected. “Nah. You can be gay, but you ain’t gotta let nobody call you no faggot.” I know it’s hard for some of you to read slurs written out so plainly, but I grew up with them being part of the day-to-day language used by kids around me. If you instinctively recoiled at me typing the word four times, imagine experiencing that constantly for your entire adolescence while also fearing the consequences of being discovered by your peers. That’s what I survived. That’s what some of these boys survived.

Before I learned other words, I thought I was weird or broken. I knew I was drawn to boys before I even hit puberty, but I didn’t have language for existing on the ace-spectrum until I joined Tumblr in the early 2010s. Before that I just thought there was something wrong with me. When we see a character in BL who has clearly been gay for a long time, I find myself examining the environment around them to see if they suffered The Knowing.

The worst part of The Knowing is for the boys who can pass as straight if they try hard enough. I always talk about how I think femmes are stronger than those of us (like me) who can pass. They face the public scrutiny of being queer and the danger of that constantly. People like me often go unnoticed unless we’re amongst our peers or explicitly tell people who we are.

I’m writing this post as a love letter to the boys who suffered the Knowing. Sometimes these characters get a bad reputation in fandom for being boring or sad sacks, but they are the characters I love the most. I’d like to talk about some of my favorite boys who Knew. Unsurprisingly, the exact kind of melancholy Japan is willing to play with means they have strong presence on this list.

Korn (Until We Meet Again)

Korn is the character who began my discussion about this in a conversation with @wen-kexing-apologist about Kao’s acting. I pointed out that the saddest thing about Korn in Until We Meet Again is that he knew what he was going to do the entire time. The tragedy of UWMA is that Korn loved Intouch and let him in, and unfortunately learned that Intouch’s love couldn’t fix the horrors that plagued him. You can see it in Kao’s eyes for the entire show whenever we see the In and Korn flashbacks. He suffers under the weight of masculine expectation and crumbles.

The Entire Cast of What Did You Eat Yesterday?

WDYEY is all about characters who Knew. Kenji and Wataru may have been unable to pass and have chosen to accept who they are, but we know Wataru suffered for it because of his feelings about family. Shiro hid who he was for a very long time, and still hides it from most people. His trauma from The Knowing regularly threatens his relationship with Kenji. Kohinata also clearly knew who he was the entire time, and works diligently for the life he’s built for himself. So much of this show is about being gay in a world that does not value us.

Book, Christina, and Yok (Make It Right)

Book is actively victimized because of The Knowing. He left his previous school and doesn’t live with his family because he was outed by a past boyfriend, and is disowned after revenge porn of him is posted.

Both Chrstina and Yok are femme and cannot pass. Unlike many of the boys in this show figuring out who they are, they are trying to survive without losing themselves.

Li Ming (Moonlight Chicken)

Li Ming has a gay uncle and still suffers The Knowing. He is hiding his attraction from everyone until he develops feelings for Heart.

Itou Akira (Life: Love on the Line)

We experienced the entire arc of this man’s life and how much The Knowing crushed him. This is probably the most The Knowing character on the list.

Oumi Mitsuru (Eternal Yesterday)

Oumi has such a frank expression of The Knowing and how much it hurts that he likes Koichi but feels like he can’t express it.

Takahashi Satoru (Koisenu Futari)

The man literally blogs about The Knowing, and it’s how Sakuko began to understand herself. He has a questionnaire prepared to help you figure out how long you’ve Known.

Ren (Tokyo in April Is…)

I wrote multiple posts about Ren and his experience with The Knowing. So much of what goes wrong for them is because Ren couldn’t believe that Kazuma could like him, too, and he knowingly faced the consequences of being discovered to save Kazuma’s life.

Pete (Love by Chance)

Pete knows who he is and can’t change it. Trump uses this against him. Pete doesn’t want Ae to be gay like him and suffer with the realities of being a Known Gay. Pete has one of the first coming out scenes in BL that I really enjoyed.

Cairo (Gameboys)

Cairo was clearly struggling with Knowing, and his close friend took his coming out from him. Cairo is a brat, but goddamn do I appreciate some of his angst.

See-eiw (My Only 12%)

He watched The Love of Siam (2007) and had a complete emotional breakdown as he was finally able to name his feelings for Cake. Top-tier expression of The Knowing.

Shin (3 Will Be Free)

I mean, we don’t have to look much further than his entire sad existence and being pushed into sex with a prostitute in the first episode. Also there’s, “It wasn’t that you didn’t like boys. You just didn’t like me.” Shin is the only boy in BL-adjacent media to suffer a specific version of The Knowing: being rejected and discarded by your own people in a homophobic way so they could stay closeted.

Phupha (A Tale of Thousand Stars)

Phupha’s entire romantic angst is built around The Knowing and what others seeing him for who he is will do for him.

Pran (Bad Buddy)

Though Bad Buddy exists in The Bubble, Pran has one of the most painful versions of The Knowing I’ve ever experienced because his is wrapped up in family angst and an unrequited crush.

Lee Wan (Our Dating Sim)

Lee Wan suffered The Knowing and broke things with his best friend after confessing. The Knowing destroyed his ability to see a version of his life where he and Shin Kitae overcame the upcoming challenges together and so he takes that choice from Kitae. Crushing.

Ueda Minoru (Our Dining Table)

Minoru is so familiar with The Knowing that he preemptively breaks up with Yutaka after kissing him.

Kiyoi (My Beautiful Man)

The reveal that Kiyoi already knew who he was and noticed Hira the entire time? Beautiful. One of the best reveals in J-BL history.

Minato (Minato’s Laundromat)

This man is one of the sadder examples of The Knowing because he’s in a place where he understands who he is now, but the internalized homophobia cripples almost all of his romantic and closer relationships.

Han Baram (Sing My Crush)

This boy is suffering so much from The Knowing that his love confession song is literally titled “Letter of Apology.”

Oh-aew (I Told Sunset About You)

He Knew. “Are you proud of me?”

Noh Shinwoo and Shin Daon (Light On Me)

Noh Shinwoo clearly suffered The Knowing and was discovered. His bullies still plague him on the streets when they see him. Shin Daon was not surprised by his attraction to Woo Taekyung; he struggled with his parents expectations.

Nagisa (His: I Didn’t Mean to Fall in Love)

Nagisa definitely Knew who he was and was probably going to stay quiet about it until Shun showed up in his life. What upsets me so much about Nagisa is that he is the one who leaves Shun later in the movie after pulling queerness out of Shun.

The Secret Crush on You Quartet

All four of them get a spot on this list for The Knowing. Toh, Kaojao, and Daisy clearly suffered The Knowing, and Som has clearly taken care of them for a long time.

Rocky and Judah (Quaranthings)

I love that these two explore The Knowing from a class perspective. Judah is wealthier and eventually comes out, but Rocky is poor and struggles with it a lot longer.

Han Tae Joo and Kang Gook (Where Your Eyes Linger)

The Knowing, bodyguard edition. The yearning between the two of these is palpable. It hurts that they can’t even talk to each other about it.

Mafuyu (Given)

He Knew and lost his boyfriend to The Knowing.

Kim Dong Hee (Unintentional Love Story)

He won’t acknowledge Go Ho Tae’s feelings because he feels a sense of loyalty to Ho Tae’s mom for taking care of him after his parents disowned him over the gay thing. Huge case of The Knowing.

Edit: New Additions October 7, 2023.

Nekoyashiki Mamoru (Kabe-Koji Nekoyashiki-kun Desires to be Recognized)

He describes a textbook case of the Knowing and finding community at the convention.

Zo (Hidden Agenda)

He definitely Knew, and got messed over by his friends badly for it.

Yuuki (Me, My Husband, and My Husband's Boyfriend)

We almost lost Yuuki to the Knowing.

All of the Eclipse Gays

Literally all of them. The entire show is about how fascism turns queer people into agents working against their own community.

Joe (The Warp Effect)

He clearly Knew before his encounter with Army, and he also suffered for being outed.

[fardf150]

fuck

[irndad]

hi im back! okey so def can see spencer still wanting to hug and snuggle with you even when fighting or mad at each other. he even gets genuinely ??? confused ??? when you try to sleep on the couch instead of in bed at night. he holds you and either reader or him is like "i know we are snuggling right now but i am still super pissed off at you." lol i can just see it. he may be petty when mad but he wont stop trying to touch you bc its a biological need of his and no argument is more important than needing you 🥺

enjoy this I did it very fast!!!! ily

He knows he’s not easy to be with sometimes. She would never say it, but it’s true. He doesn’t always get the jokes, sometimes pushes things too far and without even knowing it the ground gets pulled out from under him. 

And sleep- Sleep is so complicated. The memory of the first time she slept in his bed is etched into a place he could never erase. Spencer had always had trouble sleeping, either fear or alertness plaguing him into the late hours of the night. He used to lie awake, the kind of exhausted that feels like it’s seeping out of your bones, while constantly facts he’d unwittingly memorized about how sleep deprivation can cause brain damage. 

But then she’d come into his life. All soft words and gentle disposition, and there really is something magic about the way that everything just dissipates when her warm, soft body curves into his own. He’s slept well almost every night since. 

Except today, she isn’t coming to bed. 

It’s his fault, and he knows it. He wasn’t being fair. She hadn’t seen him for two weeks (and he hadn’t slept nearly enough without the weight of her form beside him since the last time he saw her) and she’d said that she wanted to be prioritized more. 

“I haven’t seen you in weeks, Spence!”

His head was killing him. Was it actually possible, for a headache to kill you? Her voice is audibly upset, and it’s alarming how he could be the cause of it. 

“Please,” he had said through labored effort, “Can we talk about this later?” 

“When would you like to talk about it? Because I don’t ever know if you’re leaving-“

“Do you even know what it is that I do?  That it’s not a choice for me to go? I have to do this. I can’t pick and choose and honestly, I don’t want to. If you don’t get that, we’re not doing what I thought we were doing.”

It sounds foreign, his own voice. And it’s after he’s said it that the sick taste reaches his throat because oh, that means the end. Her lovely face is unreadable for a brief moment, before something like grief splays over her expression.

It’s silent for a beat, and Spencer wishes he could swallow the words back up, rewind his life like a battered VHS tape where he’s not so stupid to mess up the one thing that’s ever brought him peace.

“You’re not yourself, Spencer. I’m gonna give you a minute.”

A minute, it turns out, is hours in the living room. She hadn’t left, thank fucking god, but she hadn’t come back. Of course she hadn’t. She wasn’t the one who needed to apologize. 

He’s just so tired. 

He thinks of her so-sweet voice, the curve of cheek- the junction of her neck and shoulder, and how much he would like to have her pressed against him. He pads out into the living room like a nervous puppy, and sees her sleeping on the olive green couch she had picked out. Her hair was splayed across the arm of the sofa, and her head laid on a throw pillow, their fuzziest blanket draped across her form. 

His first thought is how low he’s dropped, that he’s jealous of a blanket. 

His second his that she is not coming to bed. He sits beside her gingerly, and the scent of her body wash lingers in the air. 

“Are you planning on coming to bed?”

“I didn’t think you’d want me to.” He can tell she wants to sound cold, but the truth is much worse; she sounds guarded. 

“I always want you to.” It’s the most honest thing he’s said today, and it’s just not fair, how much he revolves around her. How he has waited 14 days, 13 hours and 34 minutes to hold her again and managed to ruin it within the first 20 minutes of having seen her again. He grabs her hand, soft and pliant against his in a way that almost makes his heart leap. “Please? Come to bed?”

Her gaze softens, the warmth and light that guides him back in her eyes, and he hopes his relief isn’t too visible. It’s then that she drinks him in. It feels too revealing like she can see right through him. His clothes are old. He’d rushed off the jet to see her, and the half moon circles under his eyes only lend to the unimpressive picture of himself. 

“Oh, sweetheart,” she breathes, touching the side of his face. He instantly leans into it, the contact more than he’d be willing to give up to save his dignity. “Come here.”

She wraps her arms around him, and he pulls her into his lap, squeezing her tight to his chest, like she might disappear. 

“I’m still mad at you,” she says, looking at him with such affection it betrays her words.

“That’s okay,” he says into her collarbone, “As long as I still have you.”

[xxlady-lunaxx]

This is a request but like

SaneMitsu. But female Sanemi and male Mitsuri.

Basically genderbend

Cause I saw a super adorable fanart of it and I cannot get the idea off of my head but rn I dont have time to write (I'm killing mosquitoes rn) so Im asking the best kny writer on tumblr I know

didnt know what to write bc writing genderbends aaalways trips me up but ill try 🙏 keeping their actual names otherwise it gets infinitely more confusing <- maeda (the tailor) is still the same (gender) ! (its wwaay to confusing as is IMSORRY)

Unlike most of the women of the Corps, Sanemi had chosen the design she got for her uniform. Granted, she hadn’t expected the skirt rather than the pants she had so clearly asked for. But she dealt with it, not really in the mood to ask for her original request. Of course, that only lasted so long. After receiving a replacement for her uniform—which had torn on one of her missions—she found the skirt about four or so inches shorter than it had been before. She had noticed, prior, that it seemed to like shrinking whenever she got it back. But this was fucking ridiculous and she was ready to kill. Which was unfortunately forbidden in the Corps—but nobody said anything about threatening, right?

After getting the unnecessary advice from Tengen—whom she’d run into while collecting her clothes—she stalked back go Maeda with the slowly rising fury. She had never minded the little boob window her uniform provided—she’s asked for that, actually—but this stupid skirt would do nothing to give the protection the uniform was supposed to give. Sanemi found herself wondering if Maeda was secretly a traitor with the intention to kill off all the women by making clothing that did the opposite it was supposed to. She would honestly not be surprised if that was it.

Upon reaching the room she had been directed to as the one Maeda worked in, she kicked the door open and stepped inside. Before she had the chance to put in words the irritation he was inconveniencing her with, she stopped short, realizing someone else was also in the room. It was the newest Hashira—Mitsuri Kanroji. Who stood there, surprised at the sudden entrance.

Maeda stood beside Mitsuri, writing down what Sanemi assumed to be the requested uniform design. No doubt Mitsuri would get exactly what he asked for.

Deciding that she didn’t care if there was audience, Sanemi stalked up to Maeda and snatched the clipboard from his hands. Maeda squeaked—stupidly—and scrambled to get it back. Sanemi held it tauntingly above her head, dancing away from his reach.

“I need that,” Maeda tried. “Do you need anything? Could you wait until I finish with Kanroji-sama?”

“It’s not like you’re going to do what he asks though, right?” Sanemi taunted, her lips curled in a scowl.

Mitsuri took the clipboard from Sanemi, frowning. “Be nice,” he said, as if Sanemi were some toddler learning manners. “He didn’t do anything.”

“Not to you, no.” Sanemi shot him a glare, holding up the skirt and shoving it in Mitsuri’s face. “Look at this! What the fuck is this? At this point, it’s a goddamn belt!”

Mitsuri leaned back slightly, trying to look at what Sanemi was waving in the air. He took a moment to comprehend it, confused. “Is that… a skirt?”

“Yes. Supposedly part of my uniform,” Sanemi snapped. “Even when I asked for some fucking pants. But no. And before, at least, this was longer. Now it covers absolutely nothing!”

Mitsuri appeared to be having conflicting emotions, hesitating before speaking. He turned to Maeda as he spoke, gently taking the skirt and examining it. “Is this really… what you made for Shinazugawa-san? It’s not very proper for her,” he said slowly, his frown reappearing.

Sanemi felt slightly better seeing Mitsuri on her side. Mitsuri seemed like the type to want everything all rainbows and laughter, so seeing him lecture someone else for a change (he didn’t like Sanemi’s ‘attitude’) was satisfying. Especially as Maeda cowered slightly, finally getting the hint that he’d fucked up.

“Well- Maybe it… shrank?” Maeda said doubtfully. Fucking bastard.

“I didn’t even ask for a skirt,” Sanemi snarled. She crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow at the tailor. She had to admit, this would be funny. Especially if Mitsuri decided to scold Maeda. Which he did.

“Even if it did shrink from what you originally, made, it isn’t very kind of you to give her what she didn’t ask for! Besides, I believe that pants are more protective than skirts, and it would be nice of you to help us with our job to protect others! We all have important roles in the Corps and yours is to make the clothing, right? But if we aren’t fit into the clothes that would benefit us more, then other things could go wrong! Shinazugawa-san is a very talented Hashira, but I believe that not having the proper protection for her skin would hinder her ability to protect others if her own body is open to so many places she could easily get injured. If you issued the same clothing to any of the Hashira, they would all tell you that it isn’t ideal to receive something with the means for only appearance when they’re trusting you to make them something that would protect them,” Mitsuri ranted, hands poised on his hips as he spoke. He huffed, handing Maeda his clipboard back. “I don’t want to pressure you, but it’s truly disrespectful to give this”—he held up the skirt—“to someone who has done nothing but protect! Please give Shinazugawa-san the right clothing before proceeding with mine.”

Sanemi wasn’t quite listening to Mitsuri, having grown a bit bored of it half way through, so she focused on Maeda’s expression that was morphing into some sort of embarrassment, if not quite shame. She resisted the urge to laugh as Maeda quickly took the clipboard and nodded. Probably deciding he didn’t want to deal with two angry Hashira.

“Yes- Okay,” Maeda said quickly. He didn’t look quite sorry, but at least he might refrain from repeating his actions for a while. “I’ll do it.”

“Do you need my measurements?” Sanemi asked.

“No. I have them from last time.”

“So you did measure her for them? You just decided not to follow your directions?” Mitsuri prompted, looking even more upset.

Sanemi grinned, eager to rouse the fire. “Yeah, maybe we should have you replaced or something. Or, maybe not. We should just report this to Oyakata-sama. I’m sure you’d learn your lesson then.”

Mitsuri agreed, nodding. “I agree.”

Maeda shook his head quickly. “No, no, I’ll do what you asked. I’ll do it.”

“Good. But I’m more than willing to send a crow to Master if it’s too much work,” Sanemi suggested.

Maeda interrupted him, shaking his head with much vigor. “No need! No need—it’s fine, I’ll do it.”

Sanemi smirked as Maeda left to hopefully go remake the uniform. Then she turned to Mitsuri, raising an eyebrow.

“What?” Mitsuri asked. She handed the skirt back but Sanemi just threw it aside for whoever came back into the room.

“I think we should’ve just punched him,” Sanemi said.

“No! That’s going too far.”

“Yeah, well, I’m holding him accountable for all of the injuries on my legs since I got the skirt.” She absentmindedly rubbed her thigh where a bandage was wrapped around a wound from a couple days ago. “I’m sure it could’ve been prevented if he wasn’t such a perverted asshole.”

“Let’s not- Let’s not speak badly about him, now…” Mitsuri mumbled, though he resisted a smile.

Sanemi pointed at the skirt. Mitsuri sighed.

“Just don’t hurt him. Please?”

“Fine.”

•••

Sanemi had, luckily, gotten her uniform back as she’d originally wanted it. The next time she saw Mitsuri—which wasn’t actually until the next Hashira meeting—she showed her, a bit pleased. Mitsuri equally seemed happy for Sanemi. Sanemi, who had decided that maybe Mitsuri wasn’t quite so annoying, ended up talking to him for a while longer. The other Hashira appeared vastly surprised by this, all used to Sanemi’s hostile act towards, well, everyone. And then Sanemi and Mitsuri started dating blah blah I have no ideas.

guys pls be more specific w requests i neber know what to write 😔

[satoruxx]

I swear everything going on is so out of character for yuta.

Like satoru is always treated like a weapon and now it happening again even after his death and it’s by his closest student??? It’s weird and sad honestly

EXACTLY and the fact that there was that whole convo in the flashback where yuta tells gojo that he shouldn't be a "monster" by himself but then now it's yuta going on about how they need to throw away their humanity bc it's sukuna they're talking about, and that gojo was always the one who had to be the "monster" so now it's yuta's responsibilty.

like isn't that just nullifying exactly what yuta said before?? and i get maybe it's the whole "oh yeah you have to sacrifice your humanity bc that's the jujutsu world." but like as someone who was so adamant about making sure gojo didn't do crazy monster shit, why tf is yuta now using his body as a tool, basically forcing him to do crazy monster shit even in death??

idk man my head is spinning the whole thing makes no sense. and like what difference is yuta using gojo's powers supposed to make?? im still so confused about that...

[thatdeadaquarius]

Sobbing and crying just saw your post of us sounding like a Sim, and I am DYING.

What if it went the other way? They can understand us, but we can't understand them!

Us : hey so what the fuck is happening why tf am I in genshin impact

Them : OMG ASKSKSKSKS FEDERRRALL MEERKK TREEESO! (Omg it's the divine God I'm shittinh myself oml) or whatever idk)

Us: excuse me what the fuck did you just say about my mother? (US mishearing or maybe the words are randomized? Who knows)

Everyone just being confused and frustrated on why you can't understand them. Is it because they aren't worshipping you enough? Maybe some friendship level BS where obly those who are lvl 10 can understand u or smth? Who knows, certainly not the Creator.

I highkey am thinking about writing smth for this now but having it be for like each archons reaction or smthin but who knows. I just wanna see a bunch of divine beings confused outta their mind in like whatever cities square and it turning into a "holy game of charades"

Also happy early birthday ajdjdjkdkdkdk

I”M SO LATE SO THANK YOU FOR THE BDAY WISHES LMAO SORRY KARMA MY BELOVED

AHHHHH U INSPIRED ME BY THE ARCHONS HOLY GAME OF CHARADES-

AND OH NO LVL 10 ONLY FRIENDSHIP UNDERSTANDING-

(づ ￣ ³￣)づ here have a hug for your patience- sorry karma!! :')

LMAO this inuyasha gif- obviously everyone else guessing what ur doing and the 2 others r like ppl like Venti or Kaeya who r just fucking with ppl by joining you lol

OK BUT WHO DO U HAVE LVL 10 FRIENDSHIP?!

BC I GOT NOBODY 😭

ITS RLLY HARD TO DO OKAY-

I HAVE TO PUT ACTUAL EFFORT INTO THE FEW THAT ARE LEVEL 4-5 

ID BE SO FUCKED-

Oh no.

Oh god (you??) no.

What if you had the highest friendship with little d**ks like Scaramouche.

noooOOOOOO

He’d be like, “Eh, I don’t feel like translating today.” 💀

Also I’m rolling with the idea that 

perfect understanding = lvl 10,

Most words 7-9

Some words 5-6

Kinda ?? they get 2 words per sentence or smth 3-4

Basically nothing 1-2

◇

Anyway ornery bitches like Scara/Xiao/Alhaitham/Rosaria/Diluc (all for diff reasons like diluc/xiao would just be overwhelmed and dont like ppl that much lol, whereas haitham doesnt give a fuck lmao) would kinda suck to have as translators

OH NOT THE PEOPLE WHO WOULD JUST LIE ABOUT WHAT U SAID ON PURPOSE TO DECEIVE THE MASSES LIKE Heizou/Yae Miko/Kaeya/Venti 

They pull something like “oh well the god of gods said I could have the last slice of cake/an extra glass of wine hehe”

For different reasons these people would also be ROUGH translators: FISCHL OH NO- , Zhongli, Albedo (he simply would omit “unnecessary details”, cyno, ITTO PLEASE, Raiden (puppet) bc shed take stuff too far/too literally u would never be able to communicate jokes, Razor (im sorry bbyboy), Shenhe

THE CHARADDEEESSS

THE CHARADES OF THE GODS 

You may or may not get another title of a jokester god bc of these SILLY charades 💀

The people u have higher levels of friendship with giving hints LMAO

♤

“Uhhh….. Oh! Oh! Greatest Lord wishes to see a dance performance!” 

Nahida’s sweet voice rings out in Yujing Terrace, her tiny hand waving in the air like an elementary student who’s really excited to answer. …Which isn’t that far off honestly.

“Hmm, I disagree Buer, I believe the Hundun Emperor is saying they wish to take a bath perhaps. I am also attempting to use context, as it has been a long day for them.” Zhongli is in his classic “majestic thinking gentleman” pose, and you’d admire it more if it weren’t for the fact that they don’t seem to be getting what you’re saying.

You hadn’t yet found someone with a higher friendship level than 2 or 3 (hey, don’t blame yourself, you really have to put effort into friendship levels to get them anywhere and you were still busy screwing around in Sumeru when you got spirited away).

So needless to say, most people were getting “the, me, I, you, etc.” rather than the actual important keywords you needed them to, hence the godly charade game now.

As you “hold” something, you throw your hands up in the air, still keeping your hands wrapped around nothing. You think if somebody told you last week that you’d be playing charades with the archons in Genshin Impact so you could actually communicate with them… well you don’t know what you would have done. Maybe just gave them a really awkward laugh.

“Oh! Are you asking for a weapon? Akitsu Mikami, my emperor, we or our nations will surely provide protection from any harm that might befall you. Hm, I suppose we should offer something anyway… I wouldn’t want to displease them…” Ei mutters to herself, having taken over her puppet once more for the occasion.

She and Buer, still retaining their authority status, had asked for the area to be cleared in order to try and get closer to communicating with the Divine First, or you.

“Ha! What idiot would try to hurt the All-Parent in their home, unless they wish to get thrown?” Venti cheekily says, as you don’t understand him, but judging by Zhongli’s clenched jaw, Ei’s sigh, and Nahida’s giggle, you can guess.

You give your own sad sigh… it’s already been 3 hours. 😭

How hard is charades for 4 archons??

Well… apparently very hard.

You put your face in your hands, and you hear the (retired) archons start to debate something, you can tell it’s getting a little passive-aggressive between Venti and Zhongli by their tone alone. 

…Okay, now it’s just aggressive.

The archons eventually give their attention back to you so you can go back to your charades lol

You tried opening your mouth and closing it, very obvious, they can’t go wrong. 

…Turns out they can. 

Somehow you find yourself with a hot tea brewed by the geo archon. 

(Venti attempted to offer you Dandelion Wine, or Osmanthus Wine even, and only god, well you now, knows where he pulled them from. Ei swatted his head, he looked so offended, and his cheeks were all puffed up, heh.)

Giving up, you just try to motion for them to stay still, your hands gesturing like trying to calm a wild animal.

They give you questioning looks, and you begin to walk off, they all seem to immediately start discussing something with each other. All of the gods look very conflicted, and after a minute of you getting further away (yes, you’re almost home free, Xiangling here you come! ) Nahida skips to catch up with you.

She gives you a beaming smile, and you can’t bring yourself to not return it. She's so much cuter in real life, even the official art didn't do her justice.

You make your way towards the restaurant, finally.

And apparently you’re happier than you thought to smell the savory scents flowing out of the kitchen because your stomach growls loudly.

You’re too hungry to even attempt to stop it, no one will care, except Nahida’s eyes go wide. She begins to sputter, and flail her hands desperately trying to charade an apology at you.

…you were just trying to tell them you were hungry. 💀

☆

Ask box open again! :] 🎊

Pspspspspssubliminalmessagingyouwillsendthatdeadaquariusanaskpssppspspspspssss

✨️Hope you guys got smth out of this rough draft✨️ ♡

:D hope u guys have had a good weekend!

My senior art exhibit is april 6th so wish me luck and prayers (from any religion im not picky pls)

Safe Travels,

💀♒️

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

[dearest-painter]

Revolting children! PT.1

Summary:Electro’s child (Jamie Foxx version) is a spider man/child…when a portal opens up they meet old and new people who want them as their family making them realize they’ll never be safe

TW/CW:Yandere behavior, unhealthy behavior, unhealthy relationship,abusive behavior,abusive relationship,Jamie Foxx’s Electro is used bc he’s my favorite!,Reader got their spider powers at 10 years old and is now 15-16,Reader talks to themselves,very out of character characters,this is a series,Reader own a pet rat name Remi whose basically like Sebastian from Suicide squad 2,Reader doesn’t know about the spider society,Reader is the same as Miles aka both got bit by a spider that wasn’t from their universe/wasn’t meant for them,a shit load of time skips,tell me if I need to add more

PT.2

Waking up in your bed you could sense something was wrong…it looks like your hide out in Miles’s universe. Soon you got up and went to look outside then sighed. “God damn it im back here…Where’s pops? Rem you seen him?” Remi shook his head no until the door opened and you saw Miles staring at you. “Hey…” “HOW ARE YOU HERE!?” “IM NOT SURE! ONE MINUTE I WAS ASLEEP ON MY BED AND NOW IM HERE! WHAT THE FUCK!”

Miles sat down beside running a hand over his face and you confused on how the hell you got here. “Maybe your a mutant? You did say that your mom had some powers to teleport to different universes so maybe you got them?” “I doubt but that is an option…I’ll just stay here until I find a way home” Miles nodded his head as you two sat in silence. It was very peaceful and you liked it a lot.

Soon you and miles got up and decided to walk around town. “You know I was planning on visiting I just wasn’t sure how to get to ya” “understandable, I’d be more surprised if you open a portal in the middle of my room” “sounds like me, hey how is Gwen? She said she’d visit us but I haven’t heard or seen her” Miles sighed sadly which you knew that he was in the same case as you, you honestly found Miles and Gwen adorable with each other. They seemed like they’d have a long lasting relationship or get into a long relationship. “She hasn’t visit or talk to me, I know it can be tricky but she’s done it in the past but recently she just stopped” “hey at least you get to see her, she hasn’t even visit me!”

Miles chuckled sadly knowing you were right, he’d thought Gwen visit you as she said she did and spoke of all these fun events with you that made him jealous. He sorta hates that Gwen was lying, if she didn’t do all those things with you then…who was she actually with? He didn’t let it show as he’s just happy to see you after so long. “You still got your sparky?” “Of course! What about you Y/N? Still got your magic touch?” “Bitch please…of course I do!” Miles chuckled a bit ruffling you hair as you swatted at his hand.

He’s kinda happy that only he’s been able to see you after so long. It makes him have so much pride in his chest! He’s clearly your favorite now as he’s the only other Spider-Man you’ve seen after so long!

[wish-i-were-heather]

okay so im halfway through the gandest game!!! (spoiler warning up to chapter 42)

i already gave my thoughts up to like 24 so im just gonna continue from there (literally copy and pasting off of the doc i have where i just write my thoughts as i read)

I’m 100% on the theory that Odette is Alice Hawthorne because how would she know Tobias????? I mean sure she could have some other past with him but idk I feel like that’s her

“Gigi didn’t get to fall apart” (118) um ma’am do we need to talk are you okay gigi? I feel like at some point we’re gonna have a scene where she breaks down and omg what if Grayson comforts her that’d be so sweet

I’m gonna jump Knox. Not in a good way. 

TALK NERDY TO ME????? (121) NO WAY THAT WAS A COINCIDENCE  THAT HAS TO BE A REFERENCE

“Make yourself useful, British” (123) Wow Savannah really getting creative with these nicknames

Ok but I keep forgetting Rohan is British and has a British accent which only makes him 100x hotter

Omg just kiss already

I love how Lyra is like no he can’t pick me up “she already knew how Grayson touch could linger, how it’s ghost refused to be exorcized” (136) honey no that’s not him he’s only doing that bc hes in love with you 

SHE REWATCHED THE KISS?? GIRLLLL WHATT I would’ve too tho NOT BC AVERYGRAYSON BUT BECAUSE GRAYSON IS SO FINE and i'd want him to kiss me 😔

Odette is like us she so ships them omg I kinda love that for her “you hands, her hips” (137)

GRAYSON CAN PICK ME UP ANY DAY OMG I GOT FRICKIN BUTTERFLIES READING THAT SCENE DIHSISBSJSBISJD

“I need a moment” (138) Grayson honey we all know why you really need that moment but please try to focus on the game and be horny for Lyra later okay?

I kinda ship Gigi and Brady tho. I never liked this slater guy so honestly I’m not complaining

GRAYSON HAWTHORNE ADMITTING HE'S WRONG??? If Jamie was there he would never hear the end of it

The way that Brady and Knox talk about this calla person reminds me of how book one Jamie and gray would talk about Emily but like different ofc

OKAY IF BRADY AND GIGI DON'T BECOME A THING EVENTUALLY I WILL RIOT BECAUSE WDYM HE LOOKS AT HER THE WAY JAMESON LOOKS AT AVERY?? IDC IF HES JUST LOOKING AT THE WORDS ITS MORE THAN THAT-

SAVVY??????????

“I do not care what words people use to describe me, because those people are all beneath me” (163) SAVANNAH GASLIGHT GATEKEEP GIRLBOSS GRAYSON OMG

Wait after readint the end of chapter 41 what the heck is up with knox??? Obviously he and brady have some sort of history but why’s he being like that???? Im really confused and honestly a little concerned. Whats up with him and small spaces, some sort of trauma? But also like he makes me feel unsafe 

WAIT SHE PRESSED THE WRONG BUTTON? Its okay tho shes just a girl 🎀 

Ok wait brady and knox’s history together???!!! Does that explain why knox was like that when brady said his mom had cancer? Still don't like knox tho like what

[goodfully]

oh god i cant believe ive finished reading the neapolitan novels already, its over??? ahh okay thoughts on the last book "the story of the lost child"..

honestly i was dreading the last maybe twenty pages bc i didnt want it to end hahaha. its crazy that everything we've read is essentially all for lila. "i who have written for months and months and months to give her a form whose boundaries wont dissolve." ahh!!!!! what!!!!!! to spend so much of the book saying how much lila suffered and feared from dissolving boundaries, how she had been so overwhelmed during the earthquake when the entire world felt like its boundaries were dissolving, and then say that everything shes written is to keep her from dissolving herself... my goodness. "i loved lila. i wanted her to last. but i wanted it to be i who made her last. i thought it was my task. i was convinced that she herself, as a girl, had assigned it to me." wow... you ever loved someone so much... also.. the way lenu was saying how connected they are, that even tho she has written a lot about her own life in these pages, "the very nature of our relationship dictates that i can reach her only by passing through myself"??? god.

i think my favorite parts of the book were all when lenu and lila were so close to each other during and after their pregnancies. i just thought it was so sweet, the way they were basically a family together, two mothers and their children. going to their doctors appointment tmr, taking walks together, taking care of each others daughters like their own.

i have to admit that i was confused by the meaning of the dolls at the very end, but i love that the openendness of the ending was referring back to something unanswered (where were the dolls) from one of the very first scenes from the first book (altho very interesting!, considering how not too long before the end of the book, lenu was telling imma not to believe in the cyclical nature of society). to me i thought, perhaps also it could mean that (assuming its lila) lila chooses existing (with lenu) over disappearing? actually, when tina disappeared and dede had accused lila of losing tina on purpose, i immediately thought it made sense. the first thing we literally know about lila is how she has felt the need to erase herself completely, and tina parallels/is an extension of lila the way imma parallels/is an extension of lenu. lila wanted to erase herself without a trace, and there was literally zero proof of tinas death/kidnapping/existence.

in the same way lila wouldnt be able to erase herself completely without also erasing tina, i think about the idea of how the ppl we love will never truly be erased if we love them? thats why even if tina disappeared, lila cant be erased bc lenu loves her. like how, whether its on purpose or not to keep her mother alive, lenu finds her mothers existence with her in her limp. i think the same could be said about the solaras, who altho arent exactly loved by the neighborhood, are important enough to most ppl in the neighborhood and their power is still felt in the neighborhood after their death. also, i think its a little different, but im reminded of when lenu said something like the many fragments of ourselves are scattered like splinters or something (altho i think the context here was about their children). but no one is ever never really gone, i think.. oh.. i go crazy every time she talks about her relationship/similarities with her mother (the ancestors in her body when she was physically violent back against her mother, and the.. "must i watch you become worse than me?"), and her relationship/similarities with her daughters (her daughters reaching the same age as the ghosts of her girlhood), and every time the imma/tina relationship parallels the lenu/lila relationship.

i was thinking that this book was more of accepting yourself and your origins, whereas the other books showed lenu and lila trying to escape them? perhaps acceptance of the past and the agency you have despite the past that defined you? like when lenu realizes that ninos actions are not attributed to his father, nino is his own person and he himself is the reason he is a piece of shit man, not just bc of the man who raised him. and that part when lenu said that antonios tone resembles the neighborhood, but it is entirely his own. more so when lenu had published her third book and said that only words and stories from the neighborhood were the only ones with meaning, and that she no longer felt she was a victim of her origins but was capable of dominating them and using them to climb higher. stuff about the past and present colliding. it reminds me of when mariarosa said something like, a woman without love for her origins is lost, or something.. i kinda forgot what the context was tho.

oh another thing, the closeness between the childhood neighborhood friends meant so much to me.. like there was a moment when carmen said that lenu and lila are her sisters during that little gathering with the neighborhood group of kids now all grown up just talking to each other... i think theyre like family, they grew up together. when lenu goes in the neighborhood after moving back to naples and is talking to carmen, lila, and enzo again... they care so much about each other. and talking about how much they love pasquale too no matter what hes doing. sobs.

this just reminded me of nino.. (he was there the first time, but whatever! he kinda wasnt.) when lenu makes nino come over, i was so pissed... and i had a feeling something bad would happen while he was there, but tinas disappearance was not what i was expecting.. oh but enzo.. my beloved, he was so caring and attentive, not only to tina but also imma. ahh.. while im on the topic of men, the part when gennaro and stefano find rino, and gennaro had to listen to stefano yell insults at rinos dead body and then beats up stefano while crying that he is disgusted with himself for being his son. it just made me really sad.. these are the two adult men he has and is related to..

tbh francos death sticks out to me mainly bc he said something that i honestly believe and live by, i repeat it to myself to not relapse into whatever mental illness, "it [is] a good rule not to expect the ideal but to enjoy what is possible", but then he kills himself immediately after and it... makes me so fucking sad.

lenu said this only in the beginning about feeling the hostility from her mother/lila and felt estranged from them, but i often think about freedom vs loneliness. i suppose its also something throughout the whole series, with how much she wanted freedom and to escape from her origins, she /was/ lonely. and the time spent trying to be on her own without lila was also lonely. the end of the entire series when she felt her friendship with lila must have ended... that was lonely. i think in this fourth book, lenu expressed a lot more of her love for lila.

anyway... overall i loved the entire series so much... i am so glad i read it finally, its some of the best books ive ever read. im on a trip with family rn and every time someone asks me what im reading, i really dont know how to summarize all four novels all together in a way that explains how good and thoughtful it all is. also i know its adapted into a show, which i really want to watch eventually! i still cant believe im done reading tho.. like what do i do now! ahhhhhh

[gemsofthegalaxy]

reading an AITA and man reddit needs more weirdo queers on this particular one....

The OP said they wear eccentric outfits, sort of like cosplays, Very Frequently and their friend invited them to a dinner party. usually, they ask for the dress code because sometimes that friend wants her to dress "normally" and sometimes she doesn't care if she's wearing elf ears or steampunk. this time, she specified not to wear any "clown or pirate costumes" so the person dressed in more elfish attire, and the host of the party got pissed at them

reddit has apparently deemed OP an asshole because normal adult people should know the dress code for a "dinner party" and that there are only certain things that are appropriate, while completely ditching the context that they asked in advance and got an answer that confused them because if the host meant no costumes at all, she should have said that

additionally, a lot of people are like "it's exhausting for your friends to have to constantly tell you whether your outfits are appropriate or not, you're forcing them to do that emotional labour". the OP of the post specified she is autistic btw. i honestly don't think they're using it as an excuse but people on reddit sure seem to. sorry that people do in fact take things literally and sometimes others have to accommodate that but whatever

ultimately i'm like. okay. my thing is, if you know someone dresses in a way you consider ""weird"" and you want to still be their friend, you should probably be prepared to let them know when you want them to dress more typically/casually. the OP of the reddit post is ALSO doing a lot of emotional labour worrying over whether their friends will find their typical outfits appropriate for their personal functions and checking in about them, are they not?

i dunno, i don't know anyone who dresses up to that extent in their daily life, but i can't think of many places/events where it would be so "inappropriate" that they'd dressed that way that i would be mad at them unless they wore a white eccentric gown to my wedding, lol, or if i invited someone as a plus one to a work function....

idk just the responses to this are mind boggling sometimes i forget normies exist on the internet bc im so... tumblrpilled or whatever people would say nowadays

[chaosclover1999]

does any1 else find the concept of being "high support needs" or "low support needs" as an autistic person confusing?

like i feel like i struggle 2 rly know what that means and instead of getting the chance 2 learn what that means i think most ppl assume im "low support needs" bc i can apparently speak fluent english but tbh im not sure if even that is super accurate, most of the words i know i learned thru mimicry, instead of learning what those words actually mean i just learned how 2 use them in the structure of a sentence and where would b considered an appropriate sentence placement 4 that word 2 appear from trial and error, i feel like i never truly learned words or how they work i feel like i just learned how 2 fake an understanding of them bc my biological parents put a lot of emphasise on the importance of me being "intelligent"

i was praised 4 using big words and being "intelligent" so i learned 2 fake intelligence, i saw what i was praised 4 and did more of it, i noticed i was praised 4 mimicking words in similar sentences that i had heard them used in b4 so i just kept doing that, i learned that i was praised 4 repeating phrases my biological parents had said, especially if they were political statments and for doing so i was called intelligent, i learned that other people considered me less intelligent because the statements i was saying were ones they did not agree with politically, so i learned from a young age that intelligence was just about how much adults agreed with what i was saying even if i didn't understand what i was saying

it also seems clear that people's idea of a "low support needs" autistic and a "high support needs" autistic is still rooted in the ableist concept of intelligence and assuming that if someone can say a big english word at you then they must be intelligent and if they can't then they therefore must be "less intelligent" which is honestly also just xenophobic

how does me being disabled in multiple ways factor into this? does it make me a "higher support needs autistic" even if its in no way linked 2 my autism? what about if i don't know which one of my disabilities is causing which symptoms?

or r ppl going 2 assume that bc i was able 2 put this thought 2gether that that means i couldn't possibly b "high support needs" even tho i can't make my own meals partly bc i literally 4get how making food works

it's difficult 2 wrap my head around what the words "high support needs" and "low support needs" means because like,,, high or low support in comparison 2 what? what's considered the "norm" 4 support needs? should there even b a concept of what is "normal" 4 support needs?

personally with what little i know abt it i would probably say that im high support needs but in a multi disability way but i also don't want 2 speak over ppl with high support needs if i don't "count" ig and i know most ppl will just see me using kinda big words and assume im low support needs and get mad at me and i honestly don't have the energy 2 deal with that and tbh im not sure if putting my support needs on a scale in comparison 2 other ppl's support needs is even helpful 4 me especially since i can't really understand the concept but i see it pushed into autistic spaces a lot? idk, it's just confusing 2 me

[youmeshii]

han yujin × reader

warning ; she/her pronouns used, the f word is said ONCE, intentional lowercase, not proof read (i wrote this in 40 mins 💀), im younger than yujin i have the right to write this

tags ; no beta we die like real men, friends to (possible) lovers, tooth-rotting-ish fluff, yujin is a living and breathing staring contest bc hes awkward n i love him

a/n ; unfortunately, i will be delaying the publishing of my gunwook fic cause i'd like for it to be the best of the bestest but i wanted to spice up my page a lil bit and coincidentally, i have an awful yujin brainrot. so yujin drabble!!!!!

wc ; 0.6k

hold me close and say you care, 'cause i'm in love with your black hair ♪

"fuck, my headphones died." you groaned in annoyance, yujin's stare bearing into your skull. it would've been okay if it died back at home but on a road trip in the middle of nowhere, you don't have a lot of options.

your eyes travel to his, finally snapping him out of the spell you put on him. "yes?" your head tilts as you ask. he thinks it's the cutest thing he ever saw.

now feeling a little awkward, he looks down onto his bag and starts rummaging through his things. confusion still displays on your face yet you continue to watch his doings.

he pulls out a badly tangled bundle of earphones. "you can use this...?" he hesitated, you almost couldn't tell if it was a statement or not.

you let out a small laugh and his guard finally drops, laughing along with you. sure, he was all awkward and shy around you, but he still cared enough to offer a way for you to continue listening to your music.

"if it wasn't so tangled, i might be able to." you said, remnants of your laugh left on your face and made itself into a wide smile.

his cheeks started glowing with a rosy color as he pauses for a second before trying to untangle his earphones. why is it so tangled? why can't he get it out? this is his only chance!

"need some help there?" he jolts up at your voice and just blanks out. he looked like a child who just got caught eating too many candies. panicked on the inside, completely still on the outside.

you laugh at his still figure. his awkwardness from this whole situation made this so much funnier for you. grabbing his earphones, you test your luck and attempt to untangle it yourself.

"i think you tangled it even more." you joked, swiftly untangling the wires and putting them in their respective places. due to the gods' luck and pure will power, you successfully untangled the earphones.

out of a sudden, yujin suddenly breathed a sigh of relief. you turned to look at him and his flushed face. you weren't very close, but it's nice to know he isn't just shy smiles and awkward laughs.

connecting the earphones to your phone, you open spotify and tapped on your most used playlist. on shuffle, you heard one of your favorite love songs.

"oh! yujin!" you called his name, his eyes automatically locking themselves onto you like he has so many times. he always looks at you with so much intent, it was honestly really cute.

"wanna share? one of my favorite songs' playing." you extended your arm to give him one of the earphones, him politely accepting.

he looked at the title, "1999" by beabadoobee. he mentally noted that it's one of your favorites and to listen to it again, of course.

"hold me close and say you care, cause i'm in love with your black hair~" you sang absentmindedly. little did you know, the boy next to you was stunned. he didn't know if it was because of your singing, or the fact that you changed the lyrics.

why did she say black hair? the song clearly said brown hair. he was confused. was it really for him?

the song continues playing as yujin's emotions only grew stronger. somehow, he felt like he was feeling everything all at once. he couldn't explain it, it was too complex.

nearing the end of the song, you hummed the lyrics joyfully. his eyes still boring into you, just as it was so many times before.

you turned to face him, "the lyrics are really pretty, right?" he stared right back into your eyes, a new feeling erupting in him and seeping into the way he stared at you.

"yeah, they're really pretty."

[winderlylandchime]

Thank you so much. We are all doing much better and in true fashion of my family we somehow have managed to turn it all into laughter. But I do come bearing gifts! Aka random updates about the man that according to my parents I am related to even though I have doubts.

-He burned down his kitchen… twice…in 1 week. All is good, he is good but he did learn a valuable lesson that noodles need water. And that lighting a candle with a paper on fire is NOT a smart move. He is on first name bases with the fire department already though because last year he got his hand stuck in a vase and walked to their station with it and then proceeded to ask if he can go down their pole (he was allowed)
-He made 3 of his (new) friends watch qaf (prom ep and first 4 of s2) and it was INSANE! I felt like I was watching straight men watch Super Bowl. A lot of “WHAT THE FUCK MAN?! GO TO THE FUCKING PROM!” And my all time favorite his friend going “I can’t fucking believe I am rooting for a 30 year old man to crash a fucking prom to get his 18 year old boyfriend back” and my brother screaming at him “STOP USING YOUR FUCKING LOGIC WHEN WATCHING THIS SHOW! IT WILL RUIN IT!”

-Brian the cat had to wear a tiny shirt because he had to have surgery (nothing serious all is good!) and of course my brother made him his very own Brian shirt. My mom said that the vet was very confused by the “I have more balls than the other Brian” shirt… Which, I for real had no clue he put that on the shirt until my mom sent me pics

-he is still very very obsessed with QAF. Any time he or anyone in my family makes an inappropriate comment, he immediately follows it up with ‘Bri Bri would love that one’

-he made our mom and dad watch it in June and he only got into an argument over Brian 1 time. He stormed out and then 10 minutes later came back bc he realized it’s his apartment

-mom and dad both hate Craig. And Mikey. And Ben. And Lindsey and Mel pissed them off too. Dad felt bad about that one bc i was there (i was confused bc im not a fan of them either tbh) so he donated money to a lesbian org to make up for his guilt to which my brother responded by calling him a bitch and saying ‘gay rights! But fuck those two’

-He joined a painting club. He sucks at painting but wanted to try it out and “plus it can’t hurt, worst case, I make some new friends” he forced me to go with him (he’s been very lovely during this grieving journey) and we walked into a painting class full of senior citizens. He thought the “seniors painting club” meant 18+. He made friends with all of them by talking shit about politics. Except the lady named Susie, he got on her good side after he snuck alcohol in and tried to ID her for it.

-he got a tattoo of a duck with a knife and a speech bubble that says ‘duck around and find out’ dad stopped talking to him for 4 days bc of it

-He tried 3 times in May to quit smoking and failed each time because “the world is pissing me off, it’s either this or murder and we all know im crazy enough” however he succeeded it in July due to the next update

-The man went on dates!!!! That’s right plural!!!! It was a mess! But a lovely mess. And a whole ass story that I got to witness first hand because I stayed at my parents over summer. honestly this was the one thing that I was SO excited to tell you guys about if he allowed it (which he did and im typing it up as we speak)

-oh and he also had to have another small surgery on his leg in September and was on crutches for a month but somehow (see update above) he was a lot more chill about it (not really, he was still his usual chaotic dumb self but he actually slept/ate/rested when told (you guessed it due to the above update)

-and last one he said i have to share if I want permission to share the story, which is that the Shrek playlist works. His date found it hilarious on their official real first date and couldn’t stop laughing once the realization kicked in that it’s accidentally in love over and over.

Dear sweet anon!! I am screaming because you have been so missed! I legit had people who would say to me "remember anon and brother anon?" and we would wish you both well. I am so excited to have you back.

HE BURNED HIS KITCHEN DOWN NOT ONCE BUT TWICE AND THE FIRE DEPT ALREADY KNOWS HIM. Of course. Of course. Why would this not be true?

Imagining a group of straight men watching QAF and responding like it's a sport is... well, an image. And your brother is very correct, we can't think too long about some parts of the show otherwise the ick is there.

I am cackling about your parents watching the show and your dad feeling so guilty for hating the lesbians that he donated to a lesbian cause. It's okay Dad Anon, the lesbians hate Mel and Linds. They're written horribly and there's so much biphobia. It's cringe (again one of the things we can't think too hard about).

Your brother joining a seniors' painting club is giving Ted on Schitt's Creek dancing with the old ladies. The pun in his tattoo would be one that Ted would be proud of too. Sorry Dad Anon. (My parents hate my tattoos too and none of them make any reference to a curse word)

Listen, I got spouse to quit smoking when we were still in our flirting stage. We were in grad school in one of those long seminars that require a break and they said "Do you want to come have a smoke break with me?" And I responded, "You smoke?" with alllllll the judgment in my voice. And they literally never smoked again. Things people will do for the horny.

Okay I'm leaving dating to the next update because I've read ahead (my spouse hates that I love spoilers but here we are - they have healthy lungs and are married to someone who will read the end of a book first).

YALL IT'S A DOOZY.

[rashomonss]

hi!! i've followed around since ch4 of a humans wrath and i am so proud of you for coming this far in your journey!!! your writing is so heart wrenching and it's so comforting in a way that it's such a good material to come to if i want a good cry!!!

so i've come forward to please request "You can't even look me in the eyes, can you?" with beel and it's like trauma of ch16 with them being twins and all.

it's fine if you don't accept it!! i just want to show my appreciation for your writing as it's rlly rlly good!!!

omg you’ve followed me for a good while, i feel so honored that you still enjoy my work!! ♡

I’m so glad you think that honestly, it just makes me so happy, I’m crying rn anon, if I knew who you were I’d follow you back rn bc you’re so sweet (╥﹏╥)

ily sm and I just want you to know I’m so thankful for your support, truly, I hope you continue to enjoy my work as well as a humans wrath! ( ˊᵕˋ )♡

also you meant lesson 16 in nightbringer right?? because i was a bit confused for a second, bc im a bit dumb, but anyways i did enjoy writing this quite a bit so i hope you do enjoy! (also I was being feeling nice so this one ended with comfort)

love ya! ♡

warnings: possible nightbringer lesson 16 spoilers

“please don’t blame yourself”

You had canceled the summoning spell in Lucifer’s office and thankfully the banshee was nowhere to be found. However the trouble didn’t end there, in fact it had only just begun.

Belphie rushed over to his twin and asked profusely if he was okay, due to him looking as if he was going to fall over from sheer stress.

Beel nodded and stayed silent as Satan explained to the rest of his brothers the two different circumstances in which you hear a banshee cry. This caused an uproar and Belphie began to question his brother with a concerned expression.

Beel answered every question his twin had, but not once did he dare to look at him. And as he finished the story of what had happened, he could feel Belphie’s eyes burn a hole in his head due to how much he was staring at him.

“So you’ve heard one cry before…you’ve never mentioned anything about that…” Belphie said, stepping closer to his twin.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to keep it from you, I don’t want you to be upset”

“Beel, you misunderstand! I’m not mad at you at all, none of this was your fau-“

“If I had known what that was then I could’ve told Lucifer and maybe we wouldn’t have lost Lilith…” Beel had said.

You heard the strain in his voice as he spoke to his twin, each word that left his mouth was laced with regret and guilt…but why was that? It wasn’t his fault.

“Beel it wasn’t your fault, you couldn’t have know-“ Belphie pleaded.

Beel cut his twin off mid sentence and raised his voice slightly. “But I should’ve. It’s all my fault Belphie, I could’ve prevented this.”

“No you couldn’t have!”

“Yes I could’ve! Maybe then we all wouldn’t be down here, maybe then we’d still be happily up in the Celestial Realm with Lilith. If I had known we all could’ve seen her smile again. She’d be here with us now, instead of facing a cruel death”

Beel’s voice echoed through Lucifer’s study as all his brothers looked at him with mixed reactions. None of them had ever heard him raise his voice in such a way, and it shocked most of them into silence, including his twin.

Asmo, Mammon, and Levi looked to you for assistance after his outburst, while Satan looked at Beel with an expression that held a mixture of hurt and resentment.

Belphie finally looked at Beel with a sad expression and furrowed his eyebrows slightly. “Beel, you need to understand that none of this was your fault. It was never your fault to begin with.”

“You don’t understand. I had the chance to change things but I didn’t. I didn’t come through for you when you needed me, now because of that all of you have to suffer because I never said anything. I caused this Belphie”

“Beel..” his twin said with such sorrow.

You’ve heard the twins talk about things and slightly argue with each other before, but they always end up getting over it or solving the situation before it gets worse. This time you're not so sure.

The dejected atmosphere that engulfed Lucifer’s study was so thick you began to feel suffocated. And you could tell you weren’t the only one; as the rest of the brothers watched the twins speak, each began to slowly back away towards you for reassurance.

“Ever since the night of the dinner party and what Lucifer said, I keep thinking about what happened…and I wish I could go back and change things, so that this never happened in the first place.”

“Beel..!”

“We wouldn’t have lost Lilith, Belphie…and you wouldn’t have had to suffer so much.”

“What do you mean..?” Belphie asked softly as he looked at his twin with an uneasy expression.

“I know you feel guilty because you survived and she didn’t…”

At this point Belphie stood there in silence as he looked at the ground for an answer, but nothing came to mind. This throat ran dry.

“Beel please look at me…” Belphie asked, stepping closer to his twin. He realized that during their whole conversation Beel hadn’t looked him in the eyes once.

Beel however took a few weary steps back as Belphie approached him. His gaze continued to be locked on the floor as he stood there silently avoiding his twin.

“Beel, please just look at me, that’s all I’m asking right now. Please.” Belphie pleaded.

Beel shook his head as his gaze reminded on the floor. You swore you could see tears begin form in his eyes.

You watched the youngest demon brother completely break down in front of you when his twin continued to ignore his pleads. You had never seen Belphie like that…ever. This was a new side of him you were now experiencing, but you can’t say you exactly like the broken expression he was currently wearing.

“You can’t even look me in the eyes can you?”

“I’m sorry Belphie…it should have been me, not Lilith-“

“Shut up! Don’t you dare say that again. Don’t you dare think that ever, you hear me, Lilith decided to fight that day because she wanted to, just like all of us. So don’t you ever give me that crap you hear!” Belphie screamed.

Beel’s eyes widened slightly and he finally looked up to see his twin with an upset expression as tears streamed down his face.

“Belphie-“

“Enough Beel…all that matters as of right now is that you’re here with all of us okay?”

After Belphie spoke, you then added to his statement and reassured the Avatar of Gluttony, as tears streamed down his face when you spoke to him softly.

The rest of his brothers, including Satan, assured him that what happened was meant to happen, and that all that matters right now in the “present” is that they all have each other. Belphie smiled and hugged Beel, claiming he wouldn’t trade anything in the world for him as Beel tightly hugged him back while a few stray tears fell down his cheeks.

Soon all of you joined the group hug and smiled happily as Beel wiped the tears from his eyes and thanked everyone.

[dukeofdelirium]

honestly, for anyone still giving nick (if thats even his name) credit... the fact that there even IS a debacle about this tells you everything you need to know. if it was legit, there'd be no confusion or scandal at all. and thats even without the writers themselves saying it wasnt real. and since when have you ever heard of scripts for current in progress shows, not least one of the most closely guarded shows in the world, handing out scripts??!?!?!?!

maybe the question here isn't about legitimate sources but whether the scripts themselves were real. this was my biggest issue with the whole thing. i found it gross that bylers were willing to even GET, let alone PAY FOR, content that didnt have clear permission to be released directly from the creators themselves?? youre that desperate for byler crumbs? im sorry, but at this point, you need to take a long hard look at your priorities and your life choices and perhaps seek some help (and no, not the kind where you shout your problems into the tumblr void).

Yuppppp, that’s why I didn’t even get involved in that whole mess. Anyone asking for money regardless of what the usage of that money is according to them, is sus. The guy literally solicited scripts. He said “donate to support my website and in return I will send you scripts”. This is illegal. This dude does not own or have the rights to this material.

And he knew it was illegal too, because after the writing team became aware of it (bc bylers were making such a huge fuss over it for WEEKS), he hurried his ass back to his site and scrubbed it of any mention of

1) the scripts being legitimate and

2) selling them

He dipped immediately after it was exposed that he was a fraud. I’ll call the guy a scam artist because he is a scam artist. He knowingly solicited material he didn’t have the rights to. He stated in no uncertain terms that said material was legitimate. He stated in no uncertain terms that donating to his site meant he would give you said material. He’s a fraud. He’s a liar.

Idk why anyone in their right mind is even trying to defend him at this point. Idc if the donations began before he solicited the scripts. He still knowingly solicited them and used the donations to make thousands of dollars off of shippers. Regardless of how it started, this is how it ended.

[lunarsights]

im still confused as to how the whole adore x hybe thing came about and honestly props to both illit and newjeans for not overreacting the way the adults in charge of their respective groups have mishandled them. in a way the two groups handled their current situation better than those in charge and it boggles my mind how such " adults" get put in charge of literal minors.

it kinda gives off um p3d0 vibes a lot of the time. ik kpop is rampant for appealling to naive girls and boys but I still think that groups can still coexist without too much competition. as you csn see with for instance skz and ateez they both coexist maturely without much competition between the groups despite doing vastly different performances. it just gives sleazy wannabe wealthy but really they are making bigger deals out of nothing vibes too. bc we know kpop puts more unhealthy emphasis on the imagery and less on the music itself. I dont know if itll be kpops downfall but as of late with everything that seems to be sturring about in the media towards idols and those in charge of said idols, ehh i dont really get good vibes from it these days. I very much think eventually its a trainwreck waiting to happen. maybe its bit off more than it can chew, got too much going on at once and cant really separate their greediness for general interest in what these groups want to achieve.

and even if mhj does become less bigoted she is still a pos for escalating this issue in the first place. do u think all the negatives that go on in kpop is complete karma? someone else stated that things can often be a cover up for worse things so is this really a pr stunt? a distraction tactic?

illit, newjeans, le sserafim, and all othe groups mentioned in the whoel debacle have really been mature about everything for sure. i think companies/"the adults" get very caught up in the money and therefore have little foresight of how these things impact idols. they don't care what happens to who as long as they still make a profit, you know?

i'd also point out competition always exists: even amongst groups we think don't show it (and sometimes it's pushed by fans instead of companies). as someone who's a staytiny, ateez and skz literally competed in kingdom and although members kept it friendly and strictly to the show - fans hyped everything up and made it seem real and even kept it going afterwards. i think this is happening with illit/newjeans/le sserafim also. all those girls like one another; they probs message each other, do challenges, and all types of other things. it's mainly the general public and their companies that create this idea of them competing fiercely.

i don't know if karma is the right word, but i believe everything done in the dark will be brought to light - even if it seeminly takes forever to happen, and pluto in aqaurius especially makes the statement true. pluto in aquarius is all about creating havoc and clearing out traditional channels of life that have operated under circumstances against society's greater purpose or ideals. so, if you count that as karma then i'd say yes.

i think people go too far with the pr stunt/distrction tactic takes. none of this is helpful for hybe, min heejin, new jeans, illit, le sserafim, or anyone else involved. everyone looks bad, and it makes audiences not want to engage with anybody mentioned. as for kpop scandals being made public to cover up government scandals? also unlikely. kpop fans don't pay attention to the korean government like that, and those living in korea don't care about kpop as much as foreigners do; and even if they do people need to logically think: when celebrities in your home country get into controversies does that stop you from caring about what your government is doing? likely no, so that belief is also unfounded imo.

last thing i'll say is that pluto in aquarius is supposed to incintivize the collective to want less artists/celebrities who are far removed from them. people will want to listen to music that mimics their own experience and will want artists who are more humble and home grown over record-label made. even the kpop industry is finding this out with trying to champion groups and members that are self-producing as opposed to how it was in earlier generations. authenticity is key with pluto in aquarius.