#honestly i have a lot of feelings for olphix

[not-poignant]

I just wanted to say that one of things I really admire about your writing is your ability to craft incredible villains-- and make me feel bad for them. like i never liked Crielle in the same way I liked the protags, but still i found my heart hurting for her when i read The Curse and when Gwyn found her journal. and now i feel a little for Olphix. i love how youre able to make me go "i disagree with you and find your actions repugnant, but still i kinda feel for you" esp with crielle and olphix

Hiya anon,

Yeah I honestly don’t know why I do it to myself but by the time I do it to myself I end up having to do it to others too, lol.

Like, I really don’t like Crielle. I mean in a lot of ways I hate her. I enjoy writing her as a villain, for sure, because she’s an effective villain, but I don’t enjoy thinking about her too much, because then a whole lot of complex feelings come, about how people can have bad things happen to them and choose bad paths in life, but how you know, if you still have compassion or idk, the ability to empathise, it’s possible to feel empathy or compassion for a monster even though you also want nothing good for them. The complex feelings still come.

It’s a weird zone. I didn’t intend to do it with Davix and Olphix, but I have. And, to a degree, I think Efnisien in Spoils of the Spoiled too (which people may get a glimpse of in chapter 9). That cognitive dissonance between ‘you are an evil person’ and ‘but bad things happened and I can imagine how great the pain must have been to drive you to this decision even though it doesn’t excuse any of the things you’ve done.’

I really envy people who are so black and white in their thinking, they don’t have this part of them. They’re just: this person is evil, this person is good, or whatever, and I mean, I have that sometimes. I don’t think I feel empathetic towards the Nightingale about a single damned thing. But I don’t have it where other people do, a lot of the time. Crielle is so easy to hate whenever we’re seeing from Gwyn’s POV and she’s torturing him, but when we’re not in that, and we see her side of things more it’s like ‘hang on what.’

And it is a really fine line, you know. Some people hate Augus the way some people hate Crielle. Some people think Augus or Ash are as awful as like Crielle or Lludd are. The black and white thinking gets applied to Augus, Gwyn, a bevy of Fae Tales characters, which is understandable, especially coming from Shadows and Light in the case of Augus.

So I mean I obviously like exploring that line in general, in writing. Like, I loved it even with Cullen (who is one of the most polarising characters in the franchise - often blindly hated, or blindly loved without a great deal of nuance in between). I like taking a character that people hate, and seeing where I can go with that. Are they redeemable? What would it take? How much work is enough work that the sympathy and empathy outweighs the horror and outrage? And then, what makes a character irredeemable? What is it like to feel sympathy but with a million caveats like ‘oh I feel bad for them BUT they are actually just terrible.’

All rhetorical questions of course, but certainly things I think about while writing. Anyway, while I love when people love/hate characters, I also enjoy hearing about the times when it’s like ‘well, it’s confusing, because obviously Crielle’s the worst, but...’ and it’s like yeah, anon, I feel that, it’s a weird place to be, right?

I don’t think it’s a bad thing to recognise that you have the capacity to maintain compassion though, even in circumstances where you can never condone someone’s behaviour.

[not-poignant]

I hope this question doesn't annoy you, but why is The Ice Plague so difficult to write compared to Falling Falling Stars? I Love Falling Falling Stars a TON, but I miss The Ice Plague too, do you know when you'll start writing it again?

The question doesn’t annoy me at all! And honestly, now that some time has gone by, I feel like I can answer this a bit better anyway.

I’m not gonna lie, I can kind of phone in Falling Falling Stars, I’m not saying I don’t work hard on it when I’m writing it, but at the same time, it’s a tiny cast, it’s a small number of locations, I’m not dealing with plot points I introduced eight years ago, and it’s much easier to write because the narrative tone is so much more conversational.

By comparison, The Ice Plague has a much larger ensemble cast, the core cast alone sits at six characters, with other very well-known characters like Gulvi and Fenwrel, and new characters being introduced all the time, who need to feel like characters and not just two-dimensional stick figures.

Because it’s an epic fantasy quest/road-trip story, there’s always a fuckton of worldbuilding that needs to happen. And sometimes that’s stuff I’ve done and can refer back to, and sometimes I realise I need to describe a road or a path and do a transitional scene and I want it to feel like they’re somewhere, instead of in some nothingy placeholder space. That’s either constant referencing back to documents to get it right, or changing the documents because I’ve come up with more interesting stuff (I think), etc. It’s also writing a lot of transitional scenes in a way that I need to make sure is both grounded, and not boring; or alternatively, skipping those scenes in non-linear narratives in a way that doesn’t feel too jarring.

I think ultimately in The Ice Plague 3 alone, the characters are hitting up some 15-18 different locations, that all have different cultures, different types of architecture, different botany and animals living there, different types of fae living there, present different conflicts or resolutions, and offer different things to the cast. Because Gwyn and Augus are there too, I also need to pay attention to 8 years’ worth of Fae Tales politics.

Those two paragraphs alone are exhausting to think about, and it can be exhausting to write and do it - hopefully - well. Figuring out which fae would live together best (like Gevtivar), and what they would build their homes out of, and if they would then need magic to secure their homes, and what the history of that city is (Esgrettio), and so on. It adds up.

Since this is the final book in a 1.5 million word series, it needs to wrap up around 8 years’ worth of storylines. Like not every single one, but definitely most of them, and it needs to do that in a smooth, integrated, ongoing way, so that there’s like small storyline payoffs all the time. We get them in book 1 (finding out classless fae are a construct of Mages and learning about dragons), we get them in book 2 (finding out Davix is still alive and that the Raven Prince is still around and what really happened with all of that and also giving closure to Augus), and we’re getting them in book 3 (that Gwyn is related to Olphix, which explains his huge concentration of magical power, what Ash’s heartsong is etc.)

But I always have to keep those storylines in mind, and foreshadow for The Ice Plague overall while introducing wrap ups that happen in (hopefully) a fairly smooth and seamless way that feel natural in the story. It also means doing justice to storylines of side characters like the Raven Prince, or Davix, or Julvia and her relationship with Ondine, or Ash and his broken relationship with his own heartsong.

And then finally the prose is just more typical of epic fantasy, and is just a more challenging (and rewarding) style to write. And I think also I’ve been spooked re: this emotional crash irl and how much it’s hit me, which means I’m reluctant to start posting chapters now (I have like 6 more written), until I have more of a buffer.

*

But then there’s the fact that The Ice Plague demands all of this, and is the least popular thing I’ve written in maybe 8 years. Especially the book 3. And honestly, not gonna lie, it’s really hard to kind of find the energy to put that much love and hard work into a story that demanding for something that I feel like is just ultimately not very good or interesting or engaging compared to something like Falling Falling Stars or even The Nascent Diplomat. And it’s hard honestly thinking ‘this kind of fic is a mistake for me, and I should probably never write anything like it again’ because I love epic fantasy so much, and so I suppose it’s just dealing with the embarrassment of that too, because it’s a pretty public failing, lmao. Everyone gets to watch it in real time!

I will finish The Ice Plague, because - most of all - I really need to finish telling Mosk’s and Eran’s stories and it’s unfair to leave them hanging, and I love those characters so fucking much, and I also need to close Gwyn and Augus’ storyline too. Like, I feel like I’m doing an injustice to the characters by letting it hang, and that doesn’t feel good, and I do want to actually give them what I kind of promised them. Sometimes writing my stories feels like a contract with these character constructs - I put them through hell in exchange for a hopeful ending; I haven’t completed the contract until the story is ended, and so far that’s worked well for me re: longfic completion.

So like, tl;dr - The Ice Plague is a very challenging and technical kind of writing that requires more skillsets and is therefore just harder by default, and it’s the least popular longfic I’ve ever written across two accounts in 8-9 years, and that’s very discouraging. I know some people really love it, and honestly folks like that - and like yourself anon - get me through and keep me thinking I will finish this. And I hope I can get more of The Ice Plague to you sooner rather than later <333

[not-poignant]

Hi! I’m just curious, did Gwyn feel Zahakhar in The Wildness Within?

Tbh no, I don’t think so. It was never very relevant to the story, so I never actually gave it much thought, because I’d already kind of covered that storyline in the canon.

But also, like, Olphix and Davix don’t exist as villains for everyone to deal with in the same way as in the canon. The Nightingale doesn’t exist at all. A lot of the trials and tribulations the Raven Prince is dealing with - like his depression - gets solved by the arrival of Gwyn and having an apprentice (and someone to look over his relationship with his apprentice, like Augus).

I don’t think Gwyn is destined to be King in every universe. Honestly I don’t know if he feels it in the Lone Wolf universe either (ETA he does! It just doesn’t matter). But it’s also not relevant to the story - so you’re welcome to imagine whatever you like happening afterwards. :)

[not-poignant]

Hello, I love your writing and I love how you manage to write complex characters and antagonists I can totally sympathize with (Augus, my precious), so I was wondering if you have any advice on that? Also, how do you decide on a love interest for your MC? Sorry if this is too broad of a question, but your writing advice is always super helpful.

Hiya

I‘m glad you’re enjoying the writing! Honestly I don’t know if I’m going to do a good job of explaining these things, but I hope whatever I say helps!

Writing a sympathetic antagonist

Firstly, most importantly, they have to be sympathetic! I know I know, that sounds stupid, and obvious, but it’s true. Don’t expect every reader to still like your antagonist, they won’t. Not everyone likes villain, antagonist or even antihero fiction.

Re: garnering sympathy:

Show the character as genuinely vulnerable. (Consider Augus being hurt by Gwyn in the dungeon, even if most of it slid off of him, that gag certainly didn’t). (Consider that even though Eran is Mosk’s captor and actually not a very nice person, we understand his motivations for being mean - he has lost his entire family, and he believes Mosk is the reason. He’s shown experiencing constant culture shock, totally alone, and he doesn’t understand the new world he finds himself in). (Consider that Efnisien is living an extremely bleak life, post violent injury, and that he is shown to be vulnerable to his own patterns of thinking).

Show the shift in their attitude that makes them more relatable, or that gives the readers hope that they’re not about to revert back to who they used to be. (Augus clearly being far more even-minded and less destructive for the sake of it). (Eran constantly questioning how Mosk could be capable of his evil, and double-checking on himself, and it obviously being insecurity when he decides that Mosk is evil after all). (Efnisien is forcing himself to attend very personally challenging therapy sessions, and we can see that not only has he not hurt anyone in 3 years, we can see evidence of a life lived that tries to avoid opportunities to hurt people ever again).

Make them human, create common ground. Show them eating food, getting dressed, responding to a major (or minor) injury. Show them loving another character even if they only ever love one other character (Augus saying ‘careful’ to Ash in Shadows and Light was actually the moment that some readers fell in love with him or became intensely curious about him - and so while most readers came around to him in Game Theory, just having Augus genuinely love and feel protective towards his brother was enough to create sympathy and empathy). (Consider Efnisien and his love for Gwyn). (Consider Eran’s love for his family). Make it so that people literally can go ‘oh, I eat food that way’ or ‘oh, I’ve tried to hide an injury before’ or ‘that’s how I get dressed’ or ‘I hate summer too.’ Give them details that can stack up over time and create common ground.

In the case of characters who have done absolutely egregious things, whump the everloving fuck out of them. Like, this was legit a thing I did in Game Theory *deliberately* in order to create increased sympathy for Augus. Even people who have the most intense revenge fantasies re: a character burn out on them after a while. A person who is like ‘yeah I can’t wait to see them tortured and suffering and going through awful pain’ will, very often, get that and realise they didn’t want that much of it. And they will turn to sympathy instead. It’s worked an absolute fucking treat with Augus and Efnisien in particular.

Have someone who is worse opposite your antagonist. (Augus had the Nightingale. Eran has Olphix and Davix and, well, Mosk’s entire family. Efnisien has Crielle and Lludd). Give your villain a villain.

*

That’s it. You don’t have to make them ‘good.’ You don’t have to rationalise what they did. You don’t have to make excuses for what they’ve done or what they’ll do in the future. Your readers can make up their own minds on that, and they will, with or without your guidance. Augus can still be a waterhorse that eats people and sometimes uses compulsions because he’s impatient. Gwyn can still just straight up murder people without giving them much (or any) warning first.

When you don’t encourage sympathy based on a ‘good/bad’ binary, you can still have your antagonists and villains kind of stay where they are. They might do heroic things, they might do villainous things, the point of empathy is that they’re often doing and thinking relatable things, even if the subsequent actions aren’t themselves relatable.

I don’t do these things for villains that I don’t want to be sympathetic. But I must admit, I am enjoying showing different facets of Davix in The Ice Plague, even though I don’t really intend for him to be a transformed villain or anything.

Deciding on a love interest

This one is harder. Mostly because in some ways, it’s ‘simpler’ on the surface. All you’re doing is looking for a character who has qualities that strengthen your other character, and balance out the imbalances in your primary character and vice versa. They will need to have some things in common too. They also need to get along, and have a reason to get along (especially if it’s rivals to lovers).

Like, it’s hard to describe how I do this because I don’t spend a lot of time on this part. I tend to just...idk, ‘know’ what another character needs and build off that. And that’s fucking useless to break down for other people. BUT, it does mean I can at least use my doofuses as examples:

Augus and Gwyn: They are both people who favour diplomacy over war, but can be extraordinarily bloodthirsty when a situation calls for it, and they’re both actually pretty snarky and bitchy people (things in common). Augus is proud of his sexuality and does not see the point in not fully embracing who you are as a monster, Gwyn rejects his monstrous self and is not proud of his sexuality or his role as a sub (Augus strengthens Gwyn in this, and complements what Gwyn lacks). Gwyn is extremely bold and secure in his ability to manage a Kingdom and also protect his loved ones, he is very able to step forwards into his future decisively, fully confident in his ability to do what is best for the people around him and the nation (Gwyn strengthens Augus in this, and complements Augus’ insecurities in this area).

You can find lots of other examples of complementary traits in Augus and Gwyn in particular (Augus had a happier family, Gwyn didn’t. Gwyn has military and physical training, Augus mostly hasn’t. Augus understands fashion and courtiers, Gwyn doesn’t. Gwyn understands tracking and large-scale military operations, Augus doesn’t. Augus understands finer interpersonal relationships, Gwyn doesn’t. Gwyn understands politicking that’s specifically malicious or manipulative (like the Raven Prince, Augus doesn’t).

Mosk and Eran: They are both people who are extremely determined and share a common goal (Mosk took a little while to get online with that goal, but okay). They are both actually very earnest at their hearts and want people to be happy with them, and they both need guidance from people in positions of authority. They’re both hot-headed (in different ways, but they both absolutely fly off the handle all the fucking time). Ultimately, they want to feel warm and supported (things in common).

Mosk is extremely aesthetic and cares for beautiful things and scenery, at all times, he tends to tune into an environment based on its beauty, Eran on the other hand tends to be a bit stuck in the past, and isn’t always quick to see the beauty in the present. (Mosk enriches Eran’s life in the present, but helping him to focus on what might be beautiful in the present). Eran likes to feel as though he’s helping people and he needs to feel needed, Mosk needs someone to take care of him (Eran enriching Mosk).

Tbh you could come up with a lot of examples. Places where they ‘complement’ each other are also places of potential conflict. Eran being hopeful and optimistic is definitely a point of contention between Mosk and Eran when it clashes against Mosk’s pessimism, even though it’s good for Mosk to be around more hopeful attitudes, and it’s good for Eran to be more realistic sometimes.

ANYWAY. Basically, yeah, I... this second part I’m a lot worse at, sorry. The process of coming up with love interests is very organic, and I don’t actually like, sit down and plan these things. Which means I don’t have a formula to share. (I am very much just making shit up as I go).

Idk if any of that is helpful, but I hope it is. <333

Please don’t listen to my writing advice lol.

[not-poignant]

Now that you know Eran and Mosk a bit more, what are your favorite things about writing them? I'm really enjoying how they're evolving.

I’m so glad you’re enjoying them anon! I’m enjoying them too. :D

Hmm, favourite things I like writing about them. I might just do it in point format:

Mosk:

* I like that it’s becoming easier to see the difference between ‘I’m mean to everyone and everything because I hate everyone and everything’ and his actual mean streak which does exist. I mean it’s probably more obvious to me at the moment, since I’m up to date with the latest chapters. But I feel like we’re starting to see his actual Unseelie personality glimpse through the damage.

* The fact that a lot of his damage comes from his family and not from Olphix and Davix. I actually really enjoy writing that, so that he has this acute trauma, but also this deeper systemic trauma that he’s completely unaware of.

* His dark sense of humour, and also his evident appreciation for gallow’s humour. It’s growing, but it’s there. Mosk is quite a bleak and pessimistic character, since that’s a safe zone for him, and humour that is bleak can actually crack through his shell a little. The moments where Eran has that figured out and makes a joke dark enough that Mosk laughs feel really bright to me.

* Mosk in scenes. You’ll see.

* Mosk’s general just...overall sense of ‘I don’t know why I’m here or what I’m doing here but whatever I guess’ because normally I’m writing pretty driven characters.

* Um. Mosk in the next chapter. *beats the desk* MOSK IN THE NEXT CHAPTER MOSK IN THE NEXT CHAPTER

Eran:

* Eran is a Good Boy (TM) who Likes Animals (TM) and is a legit Disney Prince with a Good Singing Voice (TM)

* Eran’s willingness to just really like people. Like Oengus and the Gancanagh and (now Gwyn) and Mosk and Ash and Julvia and...possibly Augus honestly I still think he’s unsure about Augus.

* I know what Eran is like as a Dom now. So that.

* When Mosk goes on a rant and Eran is like ‘well all of that may be true but that it isn’t what I believe and you can’t change my mind just by yelling at me’ and Mosk goes: ‘oh’ and Eran is like ‘so there.’

* Sad Eran. Sad Eran makes me want to get every blanket in my house and pile them on top of him so he can (probably) eventually light them on fire.

* Every time Eran shows signs of actually being a really great leader, though at the moment he’s happy not to be, I really enjoy when he shows the good family upbringing he had, but also how sharp his mind can be. He’s very observant.

* Eran liking gossip? Like Eran kind of living for gossip? Eran seeing something and being like ‘I HAVE TO TELL SOMEONE WHAT I SAW.’ Like, who-? I didn’t plan that to be a character trait. It just sort of became.

---

There are other things, but I think that’s a good start.

What are you folks enjoy about Eran and Mosk so far?

[not-poignant]

how long have you had the dragon reveal planned for? i started going back last night through the stories and there are hints everywhere, with kabiri, with the old lore, even the mages. even in the side story where raven prince says something like he's a plaything of mages - is he referring to this magic? how long have you known??? my mind is blown

I would say probably since about October/November 2013, anon. So nearly five years. Not the beginning of Game Theory, but before the end of it.

even in the side story where raven prince says something like he's a plaything of mages - is he referring to this magic? 

Yeah, he is.

(Which, for the record, is this line from These Troubled Times, chapter 2:

‘I have this strange fantasy,’ the Raven Prince said, voice low and urgent. ‘I imagine that I have met you not now, in this cracked and broken world where we have all become the playthings of Mages. I imagine that I have met you tens of thousands of years ago, before I was King, before you were Courtier. Have you ever imagined similar?’)

He’s absolutely referring to Davix and Olphix and the spells they lay upon the world. Other characters have referred to it too. But the Raven Prince has definitely always been aware, for as long as we’ve known him, that he’s in ‘the sequel of a sequel’ for lack of a better way of phrasing it. He tried to make it his world, but he always knew it wasn’t his world.

Most of the time I just forgot about it because aside from foreshadowing (which I could be quite obvious with sometimes, because it was so out of left wing for the majority of people), it was never relevant and I never wanted to accidentally reveal it anyway. But also there were never any opportunities to really. Aside from a couple of people being like ‘dragons are awesome will we ever see any in Fae Tales’ like...

...Although that being said I was pretty bold with my teasing about it in asks like this as well. This was from 2015. (Which honestly feels like yesterday even though it really isn’t, lol).

But yeah, if I’ve done my job well, a reread - particularly of The Court of Five Thrones - will illuminate a lot more now with this reveal in The Ice Plague :D :D :D Honestly I’m pretty proud of this one. *ducks head.*