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revasserium · 1 month ago

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chapter one: a shadow of the past

roronoa zoro; 3,225 words; angst and fluff, hurt/comfort, enemies to lovers, mostly enemies in this chapter, tragic!backstory, flashbacks, slightly canon divergent, baroqueworks!reader, no "y/n"

summary: in which zoro will always find you, even if you don't want to be found

a/n: not much to say here other than enjoy! :)

< to the table of contents

It would be months before he sees you again, months before he runs across the typeset of your codename, on a wanted poster with an obscene amount of Berry tacked underneath — more, he thinks, dully, than the last time he’d seen it.

MS. DOUBLE-NINES — WANTED — 90,000,000 BERRY.

“Agent from Baroque Works… seems like a bad lot,” Sanji says, frowning as he squints at the poster, smoke curling from between his teeth.

“Yeah, dunno about that,” Zoro reaches out to rip the poster from the wall, crumpling it in his fist.

“There a story you wanna tell us, moss-head?” Sanji asks, slating Zoro a long glance.

Zoro scoffs, “Barely,” but at a hard look from Nami, he relents, rolling his eyes, “they sent someone called Mr. 7 to recruit me a while back.”

“And…?” Nami asks, probing as the three of them turn back towards the bustling street market, Usopp and Luffy already halfway down the street, chattering about lunch.

“And nothin’. I took care of him.” Zoro makes to toss the crumpled poster onto the ground but he pauses, glancing down at his hands, “the Marines still owe me his bounty though.”

Sanji laughs, even as Nami scoffs.

“Well, let’s try to stay out of their way till we get out of here,” Nami says, eyes caught on the poster in Zoro’s hands, “at least in the Grand Line, there’ll be bigger fish for them to fry.”

Zoro wets his lips, staring down at your disfigured face before tossing it aside.

“If you say so.”

— — —

You have the most delicate hands — nimble fingers and soft, marshmallow palms. You’d cradle the miniscule wooden knife just so, slipping the dulled edge along the tops of the homemade wagashi, making marks in perfect intervals until the cake resembled a flower, just so.

“Okay, now who wants a piece?” you’d ask, giggling as the boys all scrambled over themselves, raising their hands and hooting like monkeys.

Zoro always held back, feigning disinterest, even though his mouth would water just the same.

“Here, a piece for you too,” you’d say, after giving everyone their due share. Behind you, the other boys would always be squabbling for an extra slice, fighting over the crumbles left on the thin rice paper packaging.

“Don’t want it,” he’d say, looking anywhere but at the tantalizing slice of wagashi, the soft lotus-paste insides nearly translucent, the pastel mochi exterior the perfect amount of sticky and sweet.

His mouth goes dry as you hold it up in front of him, cupped in your palms like just-found treasure.

“Everyone else got a piece,” you say, as if that’s reason enough for him to forgo his abstinence.

He swallows.

“Don’t move.”

His eyes flicker open to the shape of you, crouching by his hammock, a knife held to his throat. Outside, the night is thick and moonless, the seawater lapping softly at the sides of the ship.

Zoro huffs out a breath, “Or what?”

He blinks, the afterimages of the dream still solid behind his eyelids.

“Not sure yet, but I’d bet you wouldn’t like the answer, either way,” you say, your voice barely more than a hiss as you shift the blade from one hand to another and he feels the sharp edge of it skim along his skin.

You’re careful not to break any skin as you pull back, ever so slightly, allowing him to sit up.

“What’dyou want?” he asks, moving slow, fingers inching towards his swords, propped by the hammock’s side.

“Nothing too much,” you answer, “just a free ride off this island. And the next time you dock, you’ll never see me again.”

Zoro scoffs, “That a promise?”

Even in the dark, your grin slants crescent-moon sharp. Zoro blinks again, his mind fighting to reconcile the image of you as a child over the shadow hunched over him now, holding a knife to his throat.

“Something like that,” you say, your eyes flickering down to where his fingers are inches from his swords. Zoro sighs, tugging his hand back.

“Fine — but one condition,” he says.

You hike an eyebrow, “From where I’m sitting, you’re not exactly in the position to be making demands.”

Zoro smirks, folding his arms across his chest and stretching out on his hammock.

“And from where I’m sitting — we’re one alarm away from my entire crew wakin’ up. And… they might not be as good as you one on one but… all together?” he shrugs, “I mean, you do the math.”

Your lips curl into a contemptuous snarl, but you don’t fight him on it. Instead, you pull the knife away, tucking it into your belt.

“Fine. What’s your condition?”

Zoro peers at you from a half-lidded eye, “Tell me what happened to you.”

You puff out a laugh, leaning back against a wooden barrel, propping your arm on your knee.

“It’s kind of a long story.”

Zoro motions towards the darkened window, “We’ve got a lotta time.”

You turn your head away, “Maybe tomorrow,” you say, your voice low and fractured.

Zoro frowns, “You made a promise.”

You cast him a faint, woeful smile, “Yeah, but I never told you when I’d tell you the story.”

— — —

The next morning, you awaken to a wide-eyed stare from a boy who couldn’t have been much older than you, grinning ear to ear.

“Hi!”

“W-what the —”

You scramble backwards before realizing that your back is already pressed against the wall.

“Oh! Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you up!” the boy leans back, still grinning, propping both his hands on his hips as he stares down at you. Behind him, you can see the shape of Zoro, leaning by the door, swords at his side, a smirk on his face.

“What the hell’s going on here?” you ask, shooting him a dirty look, “you made a promise,” you spit the word back in his face.

Zoro shrugs, “Yeah, but I never said your free ride would be a secret.”

Your eyes narrow into slits as the boy standing over you claps a fist to his palm, turning towards Zoro.

“Oh! I remember now — we saw her on one of the wanted posters! You’re uhm — Ms… Ninety-Nine?”

You wince, sighing as you push yourself up and dust off your trousers, “Miss Double-Nines, but… close enough.”

Zoro snickers.

“I’m Monkey D. Luffy, and I’m the Captain of this ship! But… I gotta say, your name is way cooler. Did you get to pick it yourself? Or did someone at Bara-Rock Works give it to you?”

You fight down the twitch threatening your left eye as your gaze slingshots to Zoro and back to Luffy again.

“Uhm — someone… assigned it to me. And it’s Baroque Works.”

“Right! Yeah — that one!” Luffy smiles, seemingly unbothered by the implications of you being a member of a known criminal organization.

“Breakfast! C’mon — before it goes cold!” a voice calls down the hallway and a moment later, a blond-haired man in an all black suit peeks his head around the doorframe.

“Ah, our special guest is awake — so what about it, Ms. Double-Nines? Any requests for breakfast? I could do a few eggs, sunny side up, with a side of toast and some freshly made tangerine-butter. Or, we’ve still got some batter left over from the blueberry pancakes yesterday. Take your pick.”

You blink at the man with one shoulder propped against the doorframe, the other supporting a half-done cigarette, bringing it to his mouth for a casual puff.

Zoro lets out an annoyed grunt, “What blueberry pancakes? You gave me left-over potato mush for breakfast yesterday.”

The blonde turns to Zoro with a vindictive smirk, “You really think I’d waste the good stuff on someone with the palette of a forest slug?”

“Oh! I want the eggs! And can you make the sausages you made the other day, Sanji? Those were the best!” Luffy bounces out of the room with a bright smile as Sanji chuckles, shaking his head.

“Yeah, but you’ll have to wait a bit for those!” he calls down the hallway after Luffy’s rapidly retreating form.

You glance from Zoro to Sanji and back again, your stomach a mess of knots, your heart skidding strangely inside your chest.

Sanji slates you a helpless look and a lopsided smile, “C’mon then — can’t miss breakfast. Most important meal of the day!”

Introductions, as they are, take the better part of the morning. Though by noon, you’re still unsure if you’d stepped into some strange alternate universe where you’d miraculously escaped the dark tangles of your past, and into some idyllic, sun-lit story full of great friends and endless adventures.

“Mm, that’s a pretty name, but I still think Ms. Ninety-Nine is cooler,” Luffy says, when you finally tell them your name — the one that had been yours for your whole life before you’d been forced to become someone — no, something else.

“It’s Ms. Double — nevermind,” you sigh, shaking your head, feeling an incredulous laugh bubble out of your chest.

“So… you trying to leave Baroque Works?” Sanji asks, casually adjusting his fishing lines as Nami pours over a hand-drawn map of the East Blue, a pair of tiny glasses perched on her nose. Of all the members of the Strawhat Crew, she’d been the least overtly welcoming, staying quiet and keeping her distance.

And, judging by hardness that lies just on the other edge of her smile, you can’t blame her. She knows a liar when she sees one; you do too.

“Something like that,” you say, glancing away.

Zoro lounges against the main mast, his eyes closed.

“So! You must be a really good fighter!” Luffy says, tugging on his own fishing lines till Sanji nudges him away.

“I —” your voice catches and you look away, “I’m alright.”

“I heard that only the best fighters in Baroque Works get codenames with numbers,” Nami says without looking up, her tone casual. Her hand is steady as she traces a long line through the center of the map.

“It’s… a bit more complicated than that,” you say, your fingers twisting in your lap.

“Complicated how?” Nami asks, finally looking up, her gaze bright and hard and unrelenting.

You lick your lips, shrugging, “It’s just… you don’t have to be a great fighter to be… useful.”

And something about the way you say that makes everyone stiffen. By the main mast, Zoro shifts, peering open an eye to stare at you. But before he can say anything, Luffy jumps up, pulling hard at his fishing rod.

“Look! I think I caught something!”

That night, when they drop anchor, the ocean is still, and the summer air is almost too sweet. Luffy proposes a toast, to a new friend, he says, and Sanji has never turned down a toast to a pretty girl. Even Nami, who had been cautious all day, lured by the sweet tangerine wine and the tantalizing summer air, flashes you a small grin as she raises her glass.

You manage to choke down the wine passed the scream curdling at the back of your throat.

And then later, when the Millions come calling, no one notices the way you slip away, pulling all the fire towards you until you’re too far to be saved.

“Stay back!” you call, even as one of the Millions hauls you onto the deck of a smaller ship by the hair.

“Gum-Gum —“

“Wait,” Zoro places a hand on Luffy’s arm.

“Huh?”

Zoro frowns, pointing to a spot of white on the railings. Luffy stares down at it for a second before Sanji peers over his shoulder, reaching out to dab at the smear of white powder.

“It’s… rice flour.”

In the kitchen, they find a tray with a series of tiny wagashi mochi’s, simply made, but each perfectly shaped and dusted with a fine powder of sweet rice flour.

There’s a hastily scribbled note that just says — Thank you. I’m sorry.

— — —

It takes them the better part of a two weeks to track you down.

And when they do, it’s to an island of sand and trees and not much else.

“What… is this place?” Nami asks as they all hop onto the bleak little stretch of beach.

“It’s a holding ground,” a voice answers, rich and feminine. They all look up to see a tall figure, arms crossed, a cowboy hat perched atop her head. Her hair looks like it’s been cut with a slide-rule. She makes no move to attack, but Zoro still finds his thumb ticking at the hilt of his sword.

Beside him, Sanji looks conflicted at the thought of fighting such a beautiful woman.

“Miss All Sunday,” Nami says, her bo staff clicking clicking into place as she takes half a step forward.

The woman allows herself a grin, dipping the brim of her hat.

“Ara… if it isn’t the Cat Burglar.”

Nami scoffs, “Let’s cut the song and dance — we’re looking for a friend of ours. You might know her — goes by Miss Double-Nines, I think.”

“Friend?” Miss All Sunday lets the word simmer in the air between them, blithely checking her nails before pinning them all with a hard look, “we at Baroque Works aren’t known for making friends outside the organization.”

“Yeah well, maybe our friend’s just different!” offers Luffy, grinning widely, his chest puffed out.

Miss All Sunday regards them for a moment more before shrugging and slipping into the shadows of the giant tree she’d been leaning against. Zoro and Nami share a look before stepping forward to follow her, Luffy, Sanji, and Usopp half a step behind them.

The forest is a twist of ancient trees, their canopy high and thick enough to completely blot out the sun. Beneath the preternatural dark, the woods are spine-chillingly quiet. There’s no rustle of leaves, no hush of wings or skitter of claws. Nothing moves, save for their slinking guide and their own, weapon-laden bodies.

No one dares to speak; even Luffy keeps quiet, his mouth set in a straight line, his eyes tracking the lithe form of Miss All Sunday as she leads them through the undulating terrain.

“Ah… you’re in luck,” Miss All Sunday says, her voice a silken whisper as she stops in front of a massive tree, it’s roots as thick as the Merry’s main mast, it’s trunk so wide it’s impossible to see around. Miss All Sunday adjusts her hat, sweeping her hand through the air much as a hostess would when presenting a prize, “she’s awake.”

It’s you, or at least the shape of you, caught in the massive tangle of tree roots, your arms held to your sides, your body half-swallowed by the trunk of the tree itself. Your lashes flutter open at the sound of Miss All Sunday’s voice, and when your gaze finally lands on them, it goes wide —

“W-what —”

“We’ve come to rescue you!” Luffy says, grinning even as he revs up his arm.

The cigarette dangling from Sanji’s lips falls he leans back to inspect the grotesque sight before him.

It’s Nami who catches Zoro with an arm around the waist, tugging him back to relative difficulty. It’s only then that Zoro realizes how hard he’s breathing, how there’s red seeping like spilt blood into the edges of his vision.

“I — I told you not to follow me!” you say, your voice cracking over the words, your skin nearly translucent as it strains over your ribs.

Zoro ticks his tongue against his teeth, “Yeah well — we never said we’d listen.”

You drop your head, your throat bobbing around a mirthless laugh.

Everyone jumps at the sound of clapping, loud and slow and measured. A moment later, a man in a fur-lined coat with a thick set of stitches across his face steps out from behind the massive tree, a cigar caught between his teeth, a steely glint to his eyes.

“Well done, well done — if it isn’t the infamous Strawhat Pirates,” the man says, crossing his arms and taking a long puff of the cigar.

Luffy takes a step forward, “We are just here for our friend!”

“Your friend?” the man says, an eerie smile splitting his lips as he takes the cigar between two fingers and glances towards you, “you didn’t tell me you’d made new friends, Miss Double Nines?”

You wince at his words, twisting your head as he blows a stream of smoke at your face.

Zoro jerks forward, only to be caught again — this time by Sanji and Nami both.

“Ah, but this is wonderful! We should give your new friends a proper welcome, no?” the man opens his palms, laughing heartily before the forest around them shudders. And then, everything beneath them turns to sand.

It is not a long fight, and Zoro only remembers it in faint flashes — the base rumble of the earth shifting beneath them, the sky-splitting crack of tree trunks as the forest around them roils and breaks. Through it all, he remembers the sound of your voice, calling out something before it’s muffled by a pair of too-large hands —

And it isn’t till he finds himself standing on the thin stretch of beach with the rest of his crew that his mind returns to him, jarred and unsettled, but lucid.

The man with stitches across his face grins, your body caught beneath his arm like a rag doll. He laughs as he tosses you down onto the sand at this feet.

Both Zoro and Sanji charge forward, only to stop in their steps as the man cocks a gun and levels it at the back of your head. He grins, tilting his head.

“Go on,�� he says, “she’s right there, isn’t she?”

Sanji crouches down, his eyes narrowed. Zoro’s jaw clenches as he adjusts his hold on his swords.

You shake your head, your hair a dark spill around your shoulders, peppered with sand as you push yourself up onto hands and knees, your gaze imploring as you look up at them.

“Don’t.”

Zoro feels something inside him snap at the broken register of your voice.

He charges forward just as the man reaches down to grab a fistful of your hair and tug you backwards, pressing the muzzle of the pistol to the side of your head.

“Let her go, and I might let you live,” he snarls between gritted teeth.

The man grins, savage and unbothered, shaking you like a marionette on tender strings. You let out a soft groan as he digs the gun further into your temple.

“Ah… I’m not sure I like being threatened on my own turf,” the man says, his voice soft as he trails the gun along your face down to your throat before pressing it the soft spot just beneath your chin. Your eyes squeeze shut.

“Wait —!” Zoro’s voice cracks like a gunshot over the word, desperation wriggling it’s way up his throat till it’s spilling out of his mouth.

The man’s eyes go dark at the sound, his mouth splits wide on a savage grin as he trails the gun back up to your temple, caressing the trigger with almost lethargic ease, clicks down the safety — and shoots.

TAGLIST: @brairslair @msheds0519 @yunabelless @lynndt-chocolate @lostonthrillerbark @stunies @tsumu-senpai @phroggii @ssailormoonnn @breathinginyoursmoke @guridoodles @kyllium @naomihatake @itoshiexx @mythicallystupid @mars-mizuko @astroniii @crispynutella @enhastolemyheart @fanficwriter101 @jamesbparker @dira333 @weirdowithaphone @ink-perfect @lodeddiperrodrick @not-a-glad-gladiator @vinskyspuff @itsagoodluckkiss @blondethinkpink @ellelowthere

pls comment below to be added to the tag list! :)

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everybody-loves-to-eat · 5 months ago

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fish fry with homemade tartar sauce

#food #fish #seafood #fried fish #tartar sauce #recipe

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rwby-encrusted-blog · 1 year ago

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The Best Cooks of RWBYJNPR

Pyrrha: The Best cook over all, unfortunately most of it is health food. She makes amazing salads and various noodle dishes, as well as a large variety of seafood. Alll of it either meant for Carb-loading, as if you were going to run a marathon, or simply healthy. It's all far from Bad, but she lacks experience with "Peasant" or "Cheap" dishes, like burgers or Biscuits and Gravy. She has never eaten anyhting fried in oil until the Vytal festival when she had fried dough coated with cinnamon sugar and promptly gained a canker sore.

Ren: Amazing Techincal prowess, but again mostly health foods. Less varied than Pyrrha, mostly focusing on things that give a good amount of energy and nutrients, or what has a good deal of Longevity for his and Nora's time on the road. Generally good food. Avoid the 'Health' Shakes.

Yang and Jaune: I DO NOT care what Canon Say!. Yang raised Ruby while Tai was shut down! That girl can cook! Now, both of them can grill and fry and boil, broil and whatever, but lack Pyrrha's Variety and Ren's actual skill. Jaune can bust out amazing Eggs as well as homemade Mac and Cheese, while Yang is better with hardier ingredients. When they work together (As they do need some help) They easily make big American Class buffets of breakfast, lunch, and/or dinner.

They cannot, for the lives of themselves, clean up quickly. It takes forever.

Blake: she can make good Single person dishes, especially when it comes to fish. Not much of note, just a good middle ground of "Never had to really make food" and "Can take care of herself"

Ruby and Nora: They can make sandwiches! And bowls of Cereal! That's good enough, right?

Weiss: Outright banned from the kitchen. She Puts metal in the microwave and buys a new microwave afterwards. Boils Water and it catches on fire. She pours milk into cereal, Then pours it into a bowl.

She's a food Heathen.

#rwby #jaune arc #ruby rose #yang xiao long #weiss schnee #blake belladonna #nora valkyrie #pyrrha nikos #lie ren

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fallouthomestaedau · 6 months ago

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food in the wasteland

this post is inspired by @newvegascowboy 's post on food in the wasteland (go check it out if you haven't read it, its wonderful), and it got me thinking, much of the world in fallout has one characteristic, in one way or another, there is always some group grasping onto the past, and i wondered how that could affect food

lots of folks hold recipes and family tradition close, and at the end of the world that's all some folks have, and with that thought i started wondering how culture would affect food and food would affect culture

a couple notes first, if yall will humour me

i wont be covering fallout 76 or prime (for now) as i have next to no knowledge of them

the Nuka world dlc will get its own post because of unique circumstance within the setting

this wont be all encompassing, it is a collection of thoughts and notes (which yall can use as a basis for any ideas)

yall are wonderful and enjoy

comonwealth

go to meats/eggs

radstag (doe,buck,etc)

brahmin (also used for leather, milk, fertiliser)

yao guai

deathclaw

deathclaw eggs

commonwealth fish

horseshoe mirelurk (young and adult)

mirelurk hunter

mirelurk eggs

(supposedly iguana and squirrel)

clam/oyster (farharbour item called oyster bucket, implies shellfish in general area (all other animals drop meat but it is less appealing or too much effort for everyday people)

major crops

mutfruit

razorgrain

tato

gourd

melon

carrot

corn

tarberry

all fresh variants aswell

foraged plants (food/medicine)

hubflower

bloodleaf

brain fungus

wild carrot flower

glowing fungus

wild gourd blossom

wild tarberry

wild razorgrain

wild mutfruit

wild corn

thistle

wild tato blossoms

silt bean

wild melon blossom

ash blossom

mutated fern flower

theoretical cooking components

butter

cheese

seed oils

tallow (brahmin or yao guai)

maple syrup/sap (maple trees are found in the commonwealth)

pre-existing recipes + theorized realworld components

noodles (ramen made by takashi): razorgrain noodles (alkaline water+razorgrain flower) cooked in broth (brahmin likely), may have additions

molerat chunks: cubed molerat fried in seasonings

radscorpion omelet: radscorpion egg mixed with milk, fried and filled with preference

stingwing filet: fileted and fried stingwing

yao guai roast: yao guai meat, cooked in a thin layer of water in a covered pan, cooked with chopped carrots and tatos (maybe some kind of seasoning or something)

radstag stew: cubed radstag, stewed with cubed gourd and chopped tatos, cooked with a splash of vodka (maybe other seasoning+carrots)

squirell stew: chopped squirell, stewed with chopped tato and carrots, seasoned with bloodleaf

mirelurk cake: chopped mirelurk mixed with mirelurk egg and day old razorgrain bread, fried in thin layer of oil

deathclaw wellingham: heat milk, razorgrain flour, and cheese in a pot till melted and thick, dice/grate tato's, after which mix them in then put to side to cool, mix deathclaw eggwhites till stiff, and fold into cooled-down mixture, place in can and bake

vegetable soup: cook vegetables and seasoning of choice till water becomes broth and vegetables are soft

deathclaw omellet: mix together a deathclaw egg and milk, dice carrots and or mutfruit for filling, fry and fill

sweetroll: mix milk, butter, razorgrain flour and an egg of your chosing, and bake into a small roll, cover with a sugar based glaze of choice

mirelur omelet: mix mirelurk egg with milk, fry and fill with prefference (like mirelurk)

pretty much any meat: fried/grilled/poached (use common sense)

moonshine: bobrov secret recipe

possible local foods

marinated roast beef

"lobster" roll

clam chowder

baked silt beans

clambake

yankee potroast

baked fish

boiled mirelurk

maple anything

fried clams

seafood soups

homemade razorgrain bread/rolls

new england boiled dinner

homemade doughnuts?

vodka

mutfruit cider/wine

wines made from most fruits

cornmeal breads

gravies

mashed tatos

boiled tatos

cooked/boiled vegetables

vibes of the food

hardy food, mostly local with a lot of proteins and carbs, stuff that lasts, especially through the winter. diamond city and goodneighbour have more high end food, good cuts of beef, venison and even deathclaw are found in the markets, takashi toils over hardy broths and succulent mirelurk paired with glowing fungus, fresh breads and high end cooking, down south and along the coast, theres lots of fish and mirelurk on the menu, small house gardens, while to the north there are many orchards, and fields, small by prewar status but mind blowing to folks who come from dc way, central boston is home to more merging of the local diets, but much more pre-war food, folks scrounge for food more than grow it. the food is almost reminiscent of the colonial days, lots of dried or canned goods

the island

go to meats

rad-rabbit

erratic/island radstag

yao guai

fog crawler

hermit crab

mirelurk

mirelurk hunter

commonwealth fish

mackrel

haddock

angler

barnacle

dolphish (dolphin creature)

wolf

clam/oyster (farharbour item called oyster bucket, implies shellfish in general area

crops (most likely to br grown on island)

corn

tatos

carrots most crops are likely shiped in, as growing conditions are rough

foraged plants

aster

black bloodleaf

blight

cave fungus

lure weed

raw sap (maple)

wild gourd (blossom)

wild mutfruit

wild carrot

hub flower

wild tato (blossom)

wild corn

silt bean

mutated fern

razorgrain (found growing feral)

theoretical cooking stuff

tallow

dolphish blubber

syrup (made from sap)

pre-existing recipe + theories of contents

chicken noodle soup: chicken thigh cooked with chopped carrots, razorgrain or cornmeal noodles and seasoned with black bloodleaf

ground molerat: cooked ground molerat meat

gulper slurry: gulper innards stewed with carrot and tato, seasoned with black bloodleaf

wares brew: alcohol distilled from sap

the captains feast: yao guai roast cooked with tato and carrots, cooked in vodka and seasoned with black bloodleaf

sludge cocktail: mix condensed fog, blight and water

seasoned rabbit skewers: fried rabbit and skewers seaoned with aster, black bloodleaf, lureweed and blight (fried in oil, oil coated rabbit as its cooked)

resilient sludge cocktail: condensed fog, bloodbug meat and rad-x

mirelurk jerky: dried mirelurk coated with tarberry juice

wolf ribs: rib meat of a wolf, seasoned with lureweed as cooked

possible recipes

chowder

cooked clam/oysters

boiled mirelurk

"lobster" rolls

ployes

clambake

needhams (made with tato)

mirelurk cakes

"indian pudding" made with syrup not molases

homemade "cornbread" (more bread like}

baked fish

fried fish

boiled fog crawler

cooked meats

homemade stews

fried eggs

homemade gravy

roast chicken

homebrewed alcohol

baked (silt) beans

razorgrainmeal (oatmeal stand in)

food vibes very hearty but humble, lots of seafood, meat heavy meals are meant for special occasions, salted foods are common, lots of preserved foods, very dense foods, very filling, typical of a town where you have to worry about fish people and ancient sea gods, it is the food of people who think that an easy week is half a day off after a full 50 hour work week, imported foods like mutfruit jam is saved for the guests kinda food

washington

meats

brahmin

molerat

yao guai

mirelurk

radroach

possibly iguana (iguana bits)

possibly squirell (squirell bits)

crops/plants

apple

pear

carrot

potato

mutfruit

crunchy mutfruit

cooking components

butter

cheese

tallow

pre-existing recipes + components and stuff

mirelurk cakes: mirelurk meat, eggs and potato starch, fried in oil/butter

noodles: potato starch noodles boiled in a simple broth

squirell stew: made with squirell, potato and carrots

cooked meat

possible recipes

boiled mirelurk

apple "jam"

potato bread

food vibes desperate and despair, most soil is unfarmable due to all the bombs, people eat what they catch, brahmin are sickly and produce precious little food, its inventive in a sad way, even with cleaned up rivers the fish are still unfit to eat, and will be for a while, the soil will take lots of tlc and hydroponics can only do so much, its a wasteland

the mojave

go to meats/egg

bighorner (used for milk, wool and hides)

brahmin (used for milk, fertiliser, transport and hides)

deathclaw

deathclaw eggs

gecko (used for hides too)

gecko eggs

perch

minnow

suposedly iguana and squirell (iguana/squirell bits)

molerat

crops (some imported)

crunchy mutfruit

fresh apple

fresh pear

fresh carrot

fresh potato

jalapeno

maize

mutfruit

pinto bean

foraged (and farmed) plants

barrel cactus

bannana yucca

broc flower

buffalo gourd

cave fungus

honey mesquite

nevada agave

pinyon nuts

prickly pear

white horsenettle

xander root

possible cooking components

butter

cheese

tallow

oil

chile oil

pre-existing recipes + components

brahmin wellington: brahmin steak, wrapped in ant egg puff pastry

caravan lunch: cram, instamash and pork and beans

desert salad: xander greens, topped with sliced barrel cactus, thin sliced dried brahmin meat and pinyon nuts

gecko kebab: gecko meat marinated in jalapeno and banana yucca

noodles: cornmeal noodles cooked in a broth

ruby's caserole: cornmeal crust filled with chopped molerat marinated in jalapeno and radscorpion venom

trail mix: fresh apple+pear, pinyon nuts and sugar bombs

wasteland omelet: deathclaw eg mixed with brahmin milk, filled with a mixture of blamco mac n cheese, mutfruit and lakelurk meat

possible recipes

Chateaubriand

onion rings (the strip)

ribs

cornbread

grits

tortilla

chicken fried steak

baked potato

mashed potato

homemade gravy

green chili stew

mutton stew (bighorner)

sagebrush salad

quesadilla

stuffed peppers

chile

sauted corn (corn, chiles. seasonings)

stews -soups

tamales

grilled maize

fried fish (near lake mead)

cactus fries

nopales

jalapeno poppers

sopapillas

homemade bread

homemade rolls

food vibes western-new mexico, the strip has more high end food but most of the mojave has more rural staples, very flavourful, kinda ranch food, keeps you going all day and makes you glad to come home, really homecooked vibes, lots of variations, like never ask for a recipe in a crowded room cause it will start a fight over whose grandma had the better recipe, lots of meat and vegetables, very little fish, not a lot of "pickyness" over food

zion canyon traditional

meat

perch

rainbow trout

yao guai

gecko

mantis

bighorner

molerat

plants

cave fungi

daturana

sacred datura

xander root

prickly pear

spore plant pods

bannana yucca

honey mesquite

pinyon nuts

cooking components

tallow

recipes

stews

fried meats

fried xander greens

fried fish

fried mushroom

roasted pinyon nuts

food vibes not highly intricate but somehow nostalgic, very traditional indigenous, simple in an uncomplicated way not a bad way, some of the best quality ingredients around, clean food and clean water, smoky flavors, food isn't meant to be showy or fancy, its meant to leave you full and happy as you spend time with family, its meant to be honored and not wasted

new California republic

meat

brahmin

deathclaw

deathclaw egg

gecko

gecko egg

fish

various wild game

crops

potato

onion

cabbage

maize

green mutfruit

fava bean

apple

rice

tomato

carrot

foraged

seaweed

recipes

shi rice: cooked rice served with a side of seaweed or fish

brahmin, any cut of meat grilled or fried

cornbread

grits

tortillas

cabbage soup

chile

cabbage salad

mashed potatos

baked potato

sauerkraut-coleslaw

pickled veg

jerky

mashed potato

baked potato

stews

soups

food vibes very diverse, lots of regional staples, San Francisco has lots of seafood while towns like Modoc have mostly brahmin meat and veg, Klamath has gecko, its very locale dependent ¨(out of character, fallout 1-2 is super bleak and sparse) food is often a matter of survival more than fancy, with the exemption of larger settlements and cities where imports are available and you can afford to experiment with food

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lixieisgod · 2 years ago

Note

More eren x Caribbean girlfriend pleaseeeeee

𝐘𝗼𝐮 𝐌𝐞 𝐋𝐮𝐯 #!

𝐧𝗼𝐭𝐞𝐬⤷ y’all melted my heart when I posted pt.1. y’all don’t know how happy it makes me to know that you feel represented. hope y’all like this one 🥹💕! apologies for the late response but classes have been kicking my ass. anywayss like always repost and comment if y’all like it. ��🏽

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝗼𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬⤷ 𝐄𝐫𝐞𝐧 𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐭.𝐭𝐰𝗼

HARDCORE SHENSEA STAN just know “if yuh dis shenyeng a buss head”! he knows every lyric to ever song. when you saw one of your male friends in public and gave him a hug before returning to eren he gave a side eye and started singing “this an original sideman song mi open up mi feeling to a next man gyal” before he bursted out laughing.

loves fried plantains, hates frying plantains. it’s like an unspoken rule that he is not going to fry them without supervision. all because of the time he was watching them fry and his phone rang to he picked it up for like 2 minutes and when he got back they were burnt. He was sooo mad. frying plantains is like ptsd for him now lol, but he devours that shit.

he loves taking you on boat rides so you guys can snorkel and watch fish together. he’s a really good swimmer and has a thing for the water.

this hungry ahh eren. he is a foodie fss. he randomly craves fried bread fruit and cold tampering juice at random times. like in the middle of the night, one time your phone rang and it was a video all from eren and as soon as you answers it was him outside next to a tree saying “ i’m deadass about to climb a breadfruit tree right fucking now” and you were half asleep confused as fuck because who the fuck wakes their girlfriend up to say shit like that.

he lives for a good family beach party. when your family decide to load up the vehicle with a grill and cooler to head to the beach there’s always an invite for eren to be there. he catches fishes on the rocks with your uncles and helps your aunts clean them. he’s very helpful and respectful that’s why your family has taken such a liking to him. he makes a firee fish sauce, he can also grill really well.

surprisingly he’s really good a cricket, you though he was more of a football person until you saw his hit a six out of the yard. he plays cricket with your uncles and cousins all the time. when it’s cricket season he’s got tickets to every match. he even flew the two of you out to watch a match.

round di island fienddd he loves visiting all the cool places around the island. he loves the adventure and being able to gain knowledge about where you’re from. plus he gets to blast music while driving around so that’s a bonus.

spicy mango in sauce and mango chutney is one of his favorite things to exist. it’s one of yours too so there’s always some sort of spicy mango chutney laying around. ever since your mom taught him how to make it it’s been his favorite snack.

he loves water and parties so yk ehat that means, he obviously loves a wet fette. he pulls up with his shorts, sunglasses and cold Heineken in one hand and the other around your waist ready to party.

frozen homemade sorrel on holidays have his heart. he knowsss it’s an important ass occasion when there’s sorrel around. he drinks his weight in sorrel, spice rum, and peanut punch during the holidays.

#lixieisgod🪐#lixie’s astroworld👩🏽‍🎤🪐#aot hcs #attack on titan #eren x reader #eren x caribbean reader #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager x y/n #eren x fem!reader #eren yeager aot #attack on titan x black reader #aot x y/n #eren x you #eren yaeger headcanons #eren yeager x black reader #eren headcanons #eren hcs

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padawansuggest · 2 months ago

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I add truffle butter (homemade by myself with both real truffles and fancy butter) to ramen. I’m gonna fry prosciutto till it’s actually crisp. I refuse to touch sushi cause I hate both rice vinegar and raw fish but if I have to I’ll fry the fish on the stove right in front of you and make the rice into fried rice. Unless it’s eel, that shit is good as is. Caviar is disgusting and I weep for the fish you’ve taken the life of because sturgeon can live as long, or longer than a human and that’s a damn shame what people do for them, one of the oldest fish species who are massive and beautiful and dinosaurs. At least some other fish will always die after they release so I can understand taking from them at the end of their life. Sometimes I just pour beer salt in my mouth cause it’s so good and because of my disabilities it’s actually helpful. I think all wine not made from apples are disgusting and I couldn’t care how old or fancy that bottle is, but if you buy champagne just to pour out the bottle in front of me, you can catch these hands. That is a person’s livelihood right there and you are so disrespectful of them.

You are allowed to have your favorite foods, random food combos that others thing are gross. Food rules don’t have to apply because you are the one who controls your diet. I don’t care if you put ketchup on sushi and anyone who does is a moron who can’t respect others. As long as you respect that food and don’t waste it, it’s okay. You are also allowed to have morals. I can’t stand caviar but the reason I’m so against it is because of sturgeon being killed at like 4 years old when they’re a species that can live as long as a human. I don’t like the fact that buying champagne just to pour the bottle out (the worst disrespect I can think of to a food in general) is an actual common thing in France.

Food doesn’t have to follow rules. It doesn’t have to be seen as insulting to see someone else eat differently than you.

Anyways. Don’t eat the rich, they’re all full of plastic and cancer. Just slaughter them. Go find a truffle pig in the apocalypse and farm with them randomly bringing you truffles all year that you lovingly can in brine to keep them safe, so you guys can add that shit to anything you feel like with your lesbian wife who’s churning butter and slap some truffle and butter on a rainbow trout.

Be kind to what you eat. Don’t waste needlessly.

#anyways. the ramen was a teaser lmao my blood sugar was low #the real breakie is gonna be eggplant slices fried in more truffle butter with herbs #but yeah sturgeon caviar makes me cry #why are they killed so young for something so small #one of the few dinosaurs we have left in the world #lake sturgeon can get longer than a human is tall #they can be even hundreds of years #I year to protect the fish but not normal fish. the scary ones #because no one ever sings the praises of fish that are wild and scary and huge and powerful #Steve Irwin would understand me

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heartfullofleeches · 2 years ago

Text

DreamLand

Undead/Immortal Yandere + G.N Reader

I'll be with you in my dreams.

[Mentions of suffocation and death]

A ragged breath tears through the coffin's walls.

The wheeze draws out with no relief. Without any air, the time they're able to stay awake grows less each time. The corpse convulses; newly developed fingernails weakly scratching at the wooden ceiling. Won't be long before they join the poles of wasted keratin surrounding the body's head. The stench from their battered hands and the pain of losing each nail inch throughout their entirecbody and rack at the shambles or their brain. The ability to register both senses tells them that this particular spell of consciousness will last longer than usual. Only one thing left to do now.

"H...he-lp."

Their voice is stripped raw; cords torn from the hours of screaming and wasting precious air days ago. Why are they still trying? Going by the linear marks on the walls, they've been trapped here for almost two weeks - reliving an endless cycle of dying and being reborn from the first night their heart stopped. This wasn't the first time they died, but it was the most painful and the highest amount doing in one time period. The hunger and lack of breathing room made the corpse delirious and begging for an end, but it would not drive the final nail in their phorical coffin.

They shove at the ceiling. It gives way partially to allow a mound of dirt to fall inside the coffin. The box was unfortunately of lesser quality, but that didn't make getting out any easier; especially when they exhausted most of their energy in the futile struggle for air. Hopefully next time their brain would have enough recovery time to avoid another freakout.

The corpse's arms suddenly feel like a stack of bricks have replaced their bones. Their head swims and vision grows dotty as their heartbeat slowly fades to termination. The spots distort their eyesight until nothing remains beyond darkness. In those last second of clarity, the bloodstains on the coffin's lid almost look like stars.

"I'm so sorry....."

Twinkling lights kiss the night sky; the absence of light pollution bringing out the remarkable hidden beauty of the outer world. Two rocking chairs sit on the patio of a lake house, a table fitted with board games and a picture of a couple between them. The two look so happy together. Kay rocks backwards in their chair as the backdoor opens.

"We didn't have any lemons left, so I had to make the popsicles with everything but. Hope it isn't too bad."

Their spouse sets the tray they brought on the table. Lime flavored soda and homemade popsicles still in the mold. Kay pops one of the ice sticks free and gives it a taste. They missed the pucker from the sourness, but the refreshing sweetness of the treat was more than they needed to know peace. They place it inside their cup and wait for their partner to sit down to take their hand.

"They're still amazing. Thank you, Y/n."

You smile, pressing the pads of your fingers against the tip of their nails. "Welcome back."

Kay leans in and kisses your brow. They're still shy about kissing your lips after all the time you've spent together. It's hard not to be. They try to keep their eyes closed, growing antsy for taking them off your beautiful for too long which leads them into opening them right before your lips meet and them getting too flustered to commit. You return the kiss with one to their cheek.

"The neighbors across the pond brought over some of the fish they caught again. I was thinking we fry it tonight."

Kay grins, predicting your reply ahead of speaking. "We always have it fried, Y/n."

"But that's your favorite way to eat it."

They rest their head on your shoulder. This moment was one straight out of a fairytale. Kay surely would've lost their mind by now had you not appeared in their delusions that fateful day. The time you spent together lost some notably when they woke, but it was the one thing keeping them going no matter how much they remembered. A dream they never wished to wake from.

"I'd love for you to finally teach me how to filet them, but it's best for you to leave now, isn't it?

Kay pulls their eyes from your face. They look down at the third item appeared on the tray. A knife. They squeeze you tight.

"I don't want to wake up. Not yet."

"You have to, Kay. You can make this dream a reality once you wake. Don't you want that?"

Kay claws at the back of your shirt. "But what if the real you hates me? What if what's left of the world is a nightmare."

Kay can feel your smile on their skin as you kiss their forehead. Its warm. A consoling, infectious warmth like a dying star taking its last breath and wiping everything out with it. It hurts, they can't breath.

"You have to believe in yourself. Show them the you you've shown me. Take all the pain you've ever bared and pour it into the love you have for them.

"I do... I do...."

"Then let go. I'll always be here if you need me."

Kay loosens their grip. They take one last look at your face. That perfect features that have kept defeat at bay - and makes their choice.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Kay grabs their cup and downs the drink, popsicle stick hitting the back of their throat. You laugh and pulls the stick from their mouth, finishing the snack off with a kiss. That much dessert after swallowing so much sugar rots their teeth to the roots. The bittersweet flavor they craved minutes ago comes as you drive the knife straight through their heart.

Kay wakes up yet again to a boarded ceiling. They're calm this time; blended fruits on the tip of their tongue and warm lips ghosting their skin. They push against the roof. Their arms feel like splinters, but they fight through that pain. You're on the other side - waiting. The only reason their cursed body still walks the earth. Everything for you. All for you.

It caves in more.

"Did you see that?"

Kay's head crashes against the floor. One last dream before all their fantasies become a reality.

#yandere oc #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere scenarios #yandere imagines #yandere headcanons #yandere insert #yandere blurb #yandere x darling #yandere x y/n #yandere drabble

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yarameijer · 10 months ago

Note

What do you think is Tenma's and others' favourite food and drink?

Ooh, favorite foods! Okay so please bear with me, I’m not familiar with Japanese cuisine but I’ll give it a shot!

First, the first-years! Tsurugi has a sweet tooth, but he wouldn’t admit it even on pain of death and only Yuuichi knows because Tsurugi believes it’d take away from his reputation otherwise. He loves rice cakes, especially with fillings. He’s also a fan of dried beans covered with sugar.

Hikaru is also a major fan of sweets and is willing to try whatever's offered to him, but his absolute favorite is coffee jelly. He can sometimes be bribed with sweets if necessary. To finish up the sweet tooth trio, Aoi loves any type of cake, although she prefers milder tastes instead of super sweet. She and Hikaru go out to cafes to try out their menu and manage to drag Tsurugi along eventually, although he’ll pretend to come along just to humor them. These three are also the biggest fans of going to Tenma’s place, because Aki usually has some homemade baking ready.

Shinsuke really likes onigiri, it’s simple yet tasty, and easy to share with friends. No need for any fancy dishes for him! He’s also a fan of sweets, although not as bad as the three mentioned above, and he likes fruit-flavored soy milk.

Kariya likes takoyaki the most! It’s pretty easy to get, so he likes treating himself to it if he’s done well on a test or something, or if he’s just in the mood. Since he lives in an orphanage, food options are dependent on whatever gets prepared there, so while the food is good he doesn’t really have any input in dinner. Makes it extra nice to get takoyaki as a snack for himself!

If asked, Tenma’s favorite food is whatever Aki prepares because her cooking is amazing, but his favorite dish would be gōyā chanpurū, Okinawan stir fry. He’s loved it since he was young, and now that he lives in Tokyo, it reminds him of home. He also enjoys sweet snacks, particularly mitarashi dango and sata andagi (which is also from Okinawa, and he loves it for similar reasons).

Onto the second-years! Hamano loves sashimi (raw fish), but he doesn’t really have a preference for a specific type. He also likes taiyaki, fish-shaped cakes, not only because of the taste but also because they’re, well, in the shape of a fish. He and Hayami often get some if they're hanging out after school, most often with red bean paste or custard filling. Although Hayami likes taiyaki too, he prefers gyõza (Japanese dumplings). He’s also a pretty big tea fan, especially green tea, which he has in common with Shindou.

Speaking of - everyone knows Shindou is a rich kid. Influential, loaded family that goes to operas and pays for private tutoring outside of school and eats at a five star restaurant every other month. And yet, ironically, his absolute favorite food turns out to be homemade ramen from Rairaiken (after his friends have introduced him to it, of course). He likes to experiment with toppings and is delighted whenever he finds a new combination he enjoys.

Kirino’s favorite food is sushi, also because there’s such a wide variety of it, and he can pick whatever he feels like at that moment. Luckily for him, he’s best friends with rich kid Shindou, and whenever they hang out at his manor, the staff knows to prepare sushi. Kirino takes full advantage of this and claims it’s payment for dealing with Shindou’s soccer strategy ramblings. Just like Shindou and Hayami, he likes green tea, but he prefers royal milk tea.

Nishiki picked up a love for Italian cuisine during his time abroad. He loves ravioli (stuffed pasta) and he’s got a preference for ciabatta bread. He’s lucky enough not to be lactose intolerant like many other Japanese people, and he absolutely LOVED spending time in a country with countless cheese options, in which Japan is, unsurprisingly, lacking. He’s cooked for his friends a few times and it was a pretty big success.

Midori and Kurama, surprisingly enough, share their favorite food: kushiyaki, skewered and grilled foods. Midori loves grilled pork skewers, whereas Kurama’s favorite are grilled vegetable skewers. Midori likes other types as well, but Kurama’s a picky eater so he'll stick to his vegetables, thank you very much.

Akane can usually be found with various types of bread in her bento, the specific kind switching every day. It’s her favorite snack and she usually brings some to eat during afternoon practice. Her favorites are melonpan and anpan (filled with red bean paste). She brings enough for the entire team as a treat if they’ve won a particularly hard match. She also really loves bubble tea (her favorite is honeydew milk tea), and often drags Aoi and Midori along. Aoi’s favorite is matcha milk tea, and Midori’s is black milk tea.

Aoyama, as mentioned in the AR one-shot collection, is obsessed with noodles. His favorite is kitsune udon, but he likes switching it up so he also orders other dishes quite regularly. Ichino also appreciates udon and other noodle foods (he doesn’t really have a choice, being best friends with Aoyama), and he’s also a big fan of shaved ice.

Finally the third-years! They’ve actually got a pretty big thing in common there: they all prefer the company over the food, really. Sangoku, for example, doesn’t really have a favorite food. He loves cooking, and cooking for others, and he’s a fan of trying out new recipes, although he favors traditional Japanese meals. He originally taught himself how to cook because his mother is usually busy with work, but discovered a love for it and he likes seeing his friends enjoy his food. He does really enjoy a good cup of green tea, though, like Shindou and Hayami.

Next, Kurumada! If asked, he claims he likes going to yakiniku (grilled meat) restaurants with his friends most. He thinks it’s tasty, and he likes having multiple options for food and being able to just get whatever he’s in the mood for at the time. It’s only made better by the company, although inviting his team along has been known to end in chaos.

Amagi’s favorite food is katsudon, which he has in common with Mahoro. When they were kids, he, Mahoro and their childhood friend Kousaka Yukie would eat it as often as their parents would allow - that’s where his love for shared meals began, because it’s much more fun to eat together than alone.

…I may have gone a bit overboard with this. Whoops?

Hope you enjoyed!

#inazuma eleven #inazuma eleven go #ie11 #ina11 #ie go #fanfic #matsukaze tenma #tsurugi kyousuke #shindou takuto #raimon #accidental reverse #kirino ranmaru #sangoku taichi #nishizono shinsuke

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johannestevans · 10 months ago

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always curious what people's like. staple meals and regular meals are

like the meals you regularly cook a few times in a month, for yourself or your family as well

bc for me it's like

bacon sandwiches. basic.

garlic bread

baked feta with peppers & tomatoes, oregano, olive oil, a bit of lemon juice

the lidl potato gratin with peppers, tomatoes, and spinach mixed in, again normally with olive oil and some cheese

roast chicken with roasted potatoes and root vegetables, normally carrots and parsnips

pork souvlakia, chunks of usually belly pork or chop on kebab sticks and oven grilled with or without chunks of pepper and tomato

dolmades, vine leaves stuffed with stewed rice

chicken risotto made with chicken stock on a base of butter with spring onions and bacon to toast the rice with

pasta with chicken pieces with a tomato-based sauce w more cheese and vegetables

a "greek salad" with some modifications - chunks of cucumber, tomato, red and yellow pepper, spinach leaves, red onion or spring onions, garlic granules, and then olive oil and feta chunks

parchment pastry scrolls, a spread of pastry smeared with tomato purée or similar chutney, cheese, bacon, vegetables, or mushrooms, and then cut into discs and baked

homemade burgers with beef or lamb mince, tiny chopped onions, egg, honey as a binding agent, and then fried hopefully to eat with slices of cheddar or leerdammer, bacon, and pickles/cornichons

i made a kouneli stifado a while back (whole rabbit cut into chunks, slow cooked with potatoes and root vegetables, onions, red wine, stock, etc) that i want to do more regularly bc a whole rabbit is a fiver and it feeds a LOT of people

then obvs like. various oven cooked things i don't modify, like prawn tempura or frozen calamari, etc

because i've moved and haven't set up my rice cooker or got my short grain rice again, and bc i don't have a new deep fat fryer yet, i'm not cooking like, my fresh cut chips, or maki rolls and onigiri, or a meal i'd regularly do of just like. fried eggs on rice and stuff

i used to make lasagnes more regularly and i'd like to go back to that, esp bc like... i love making latkes and once we have a nice wide frying pan it will be nice to do that more regularly, and my big thing atm is that i want to learn to cook with some new ingredients

i want to learn to do more and more interesting stuff with coconut and pineapple, i want to do more like. kormas and other diff curries, i want more green vegetables, esp asparagus and broccoli

i want to cook more with different fish and sea food bc i know i desperately need the oil for my fucked up joints and brain, i want to break more breads and savoury things, esp garlic and tearaway breads

esp bc like. my body's capacity for red meat is fucking terrible lmao, i want more fibre and less heavy protein from red meat at once so i don't just utterly eviscerate my guts lmao

#musings

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vampire-superstar · 1 year ago

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Obey Me Characters: Can they Cook? HCs

Lucifer: Yes, but. Somethings off. It's perfect but you can't put your finger on why it feels wrong. Like being somewhere you aren't supposed to. Something isn't right. You probably shouldn't eat it.

Mammon: Surprisingly, yes. It tastes microwaved but the food is genuine and you can see he really tried

Leviathan: No. That's it. No. He eats cup noodles and pizza, of course he can't cook. His food tastes like it was dunked in fish water and microwaved for 30 minutes

Asmodeus: WHY IS IT STILL PINK??? He cooks based off aesthetic and not rationality. Salmonella sounds cute until you get it.

Beelzebub: Yes! He's actually really good! He'll slave away for hours just to make a meal he'll eat in thirty seconds but yes! Stan Bee

Belphegor: No.

Satan: Maybe? It's subjective. He cooks like a broke college student though. He can make grilled cheese, Homemade pizza and stir fry for special occasions, that's IT.

Diavolo: Eh. He's a big himbo he tries but most of the time it's a half decent dish and he slapped cheese and ketchup on it to make it better. Have Hells Kitchen on standby

Barbie-Toes: Yes, it's kinda his job. Safe to say he's throwing down in that kitchen. He will go into attack mode if he sees you with 'mundane food'. Eat your chicken mushroom puree and pasta with fra diavolo right now >:( He'll wait

Simeon: He's better at baking. He's an amazing baker but is ok when it comes to anything that isnt a roast or slow cooked. Otherwise it's pretty good

Solomon: Now you know damn well. If you call a house fire cooking, you've come to the right place. Please evacuate the premises IMMEDIATELY. He cooks like he's making potions. You will find roaches and newt eyes in your marsala. That's if you extinguish the flames first. This was the beef Barbatos had with him. I'd beef too if I found something squishing and swimming around in my casserole.

Luke: Can bake like Simeon. Just can't cook. He's like 8 what do you expect. He's also the reason the og paws event exists, he's not let off the hook 😤

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sohannabarberaesque · 1 month ago

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Postcards from Snagglepuss

Notes from a short excursion to the Warrens Cranberry Festival

Ain't it the truth ... ain't it the truth: The Warrens Cranberry Festival happens to be the world's single largest celebration of that Thanksgiving staple known as the cranberry--but even then, such isn't exactly for Thanksgiving anymore.

The fact of which drives this west-central Wisconsin village of some 550 people to celebrate cranberries over the last full September weekend per the calendar. Which had our intrepid party, including the ursine guests of the Hair Bear Bunch and Emmy Lou and Jenny Lee, driving up US 12 towards Warrens--"to get all the more off the beaten path," as I like explaining it--in the pre-dawn of what was expected to be a rather decently lit early-autumnal Saturday to so enjoy.

Which was enough of an opportunity for us to not only stock up on cranberry juice (even though it was possible to get it at any decent supermarket or convenience store) and dried cranberries (for some orange-cranberry muffins, tea bread and scones over the fall), but also, for one, browse what was said to be one of the largest arts and crafts markets in conjunction with a community festival generally (something especially fascinating to Emmy Lou and Jenny Lee, all the while trying not to get caught up in the kitschy for their van) ... but also to walk through an actual Wisconsin cranberry marsh just ahead of the cranberry harvest, which should be starting ere you Old Hanna-Barberians read this or otherwise within measurable distance of its appearance.

And just to imagine us in hip waders going through a cranberry marsh without getting dumb stares or cheap laughs from fellow festgoers or the locals ... definitely an experience for such among us as have gone through plenty of experiences, surviving to relate them even! Including, as it turned out, stumbling upon the CB Bears (Hustle, Bump and Boogie) at a French-fry stand which specialised in the "loaded" such as made poutine look like one of Yogi Bear's picnic basket plunder exercises cut short by a certain Ranger Smith.

Witness Huck, yours truly and the Hair Bears alongside the CB Bears taking some rather interesting takes on French fries (yours truly, as did Hair Bear, Bump and Crazy Claws, took Philly cheesesteak fries) for luncheon. And to hear the former CB-guided ursine detective trio note it, having a truck-mounted camper and ditching the detective bit was the best thing for them, Hustle trying to hold tears back in explaining that their beloved Perfume Wagon had to be scrapped as it was just becoming a headache to maintain. "But at least we manage," Boogie remarked, "to get some more fishing in."

"And we were getting tired of the detective schtick," Hustle was quick to add.

And what could be more apropos the Warrens Cranberry Festival than to get some serious orange-cranberry muffins--homemade, and not the Kwik Trip sort, definitely worth having over a late-night coffee. Or maybe a Sunday morning such, drinking in the artificial view of the artificial waters of Artificial Lake Delton, "and not being a stupid jerk about it," chimed in Crazy Claws. "As some tourists over the summer seem to be, if you believe the stereotype about the Illinois crowds who come to the Dells."

At any rate, the somewhat hazy and almost autumnal colour of the sun for the time of year certainly made an impression ... especially when the breakfast and morning snacks are punctuated by glasses of cranberry juice, and not the so-called "cranberry juice cocktail." Especially because of the effects on the kidney and bladder.

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