#holiday reviews
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 1 month ago
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It's that (Almost Christmas) time of year again!
(2023) (2024)
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hummingbird-games · 1 month ago
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2024 in Review (Indie Games)
2023 | 2022 | 2021
Helloooo gamer friends!!!
I'm so tired.
Lol.
Anyhoo, y'all don't care about that!!! Y'all are here to see what games I played and what the heck I have to say about them! Reminders: I don't bash games I didn't like, and I try to post more in-depth thoughts and reviews and general yapping to Gem's Game Gems.
DEMOS
When Stars Collide - I am by no means a sci-fi girlie. I need a HEAPING dose of fantasy or fantasy elements to help me out. That said, y'all might remember how I went feral for Gilded Shadows, so I am locked in for this journey with WSC. It's just as mysterious and lore intense as GS, but also just as intriguing and engaging!
Love Me, Love Me Not - I looooove when a game charms me to pieces??? Our MC Addie, the introduced LIs, the story, the art??? Where do I begin?? Anyway, please check this one out y'all! I'm impatient for the full game (shocker, I know).
Threads of You: Beyond the Bay - So my thoughts and reactions for this one are on the side blog, but I really enjoyed the demo and I have eyes for Chris, Vince, and Alex hehehe.
Lost in Limbo - While I'd been keeping tabs on this game for what seems forever because of the character art that originally caught my attention, I almost didn't finish the demo because it was lowkey disturbing (I'm a wimp and not all horror is made equal). But!!! BUT!!!! I push through to the end, had a good time, noted that I need to play the full game in the daylight with the music turned down low. And I absolutely adore Ara and Xal so, so much.
A Simple Twist of Fae - Absolutely no one cares, but I read a lot of manga this year. Like, a lot-a lot. Like, ~180 books and 1/3 of that was manga. Anyhoo, When JMB announced she was cooking up this game, I was impatient to get my grubby hands on it. AND THEN I PLAYED IT AND IT WAS THE SHOJO INSPIRED GAME OF MY DREAMS?!?! Like.....I wish I could both have it on my computer and also on my bookshelf. Final build dropping when??? (Also the UI design is utterly delightful, I cry.)
The Summit Library (FULL DEMO) - The last time I reviewed this game, we got chapter 1 as a taste, and I was. Locked! In!! The full demo gives us the first 2 chapters as well as the previews for all the romance routes and while giving everyone a whirl I'm *still* undecided on who to go for in the future, I must mention this: TSL is so aspec friendly???? I do love a game with smut, don't get me wrong looks at College Craze but sometimes I have my moments of being overwhelmed/sliiiiiiightly repulsed and the variety of options you have to choose how you react and interact with the various LIs in this game is amazing. (I have more thoughts on this, so I'll try to remember to post to the sideblog, but please understand that this game is totally worth your attention and time imo!!!)
Fully Released & Played (at least 1 playthrough)
Rabbit Trail - This. Game. Is. SO. Cute. *punches the air* 😭🥹(Copy + paste of my review on the itch.io page -> This was so charming, so fluffy, so cozy, just delightful all around??? I've only reached one ending so far, but René is just the cutest protag to play as, and his interactions as he delivers his mail made me cheese so dang hard! (Also, I wanted to fight his parents for not properly appreciating their kid LOL))
Stuck by Design - I checked this game out because I was looking into games that fellow programmers had worked on, and this cozy game stumbled onto my lap. The music was perfect, the UI is beautiful and clean, and I thoroughly enjoyed the performance of the VA for the LI, Yuki.
Wake Me Up If You Need Me - I called this game older!HSDJY MC x Ryan coded and I'm still right. The voice actor MAKES this game, and the interactions the player has with Reed is so flippin' delightful?? All my love and adoration to the game developer. May they make more beautiful games.
CTRL FREAK - The developer team brought us The Faithfulness of the Universe which is a banger in its own right, and CTRL FREAK is the team's commercial, finished project that I also found delightful. The soundtrack and the animations are chef's kiss 💛
Breathless Winds - Ooo, baby, ooo. So. If there is only one game you play from this list and you have some spare cash to spend (at the time of writing, the game is on sale!!!) please, please, check this one out. It left me absolutely spellbound, both the orginal demo, and then the full game. While I didn't get to blog fully about this one, and I only tackled 2 of the 4 routes, this game is absolutely everything. This is my indie game of the year. Poppy and her journey resonated with me, and between the music and the art, everything just came together so perfectly.
Wake Up Magical Girl - Listen TF up, if miseri creates it, I'm gonna play it, idc, idc. That being said...this game had a kick to it that when I finished my first playthrough, I had to stare off into space and gather myself. It takes the concept of magical girls and heroism and gave me a teeny tiny existential crisis, but other than that, I'm fine, it's fine, play this game, thank you.
Sleeping Under Spells - God, I love me a game where I get to argue with a LI. I love it. Bonus points if it's lowkey stupid stuff we're bickering over LOL!!
Our Wonderland - Yeah, uh huh, you thought you'd escape me talking about this game this year, didn't yah???? Too bad. The fifth and final arc dropped this year and I played it and I cried and felt for the briefest moments that life was okay. To say something different than my review of last year, I love that this seems to be the game that helps fellow ace devs find and flock to each other, I'm not kidding 🤣 so thank you Carrot for helping us fellow aspec peeps feel seen and validated and understood!
I Watched a Full Game Playthrough and Highly Recommend
Replay Boys - Okay so technically at the time of posting, there's still one more video I'm waiting to watch (Naja of BlerdyOtome uploaded her stream to YouTube) but my Godddddd. I've had my eye on this game for FOREVER but I was lowkey waiting for it to move to itch.io (I'm still a lowkey Steam hater 🥹) anyhoo, watching this absolutely wild game made me go ahead and buy a copy for myself to replay at a later time, but it's just great. The summary only scratches this surface of what the game entails 🤣
Gemi’s Gushies
(a list within a list of games that have devs trucking along in the background and I want to spotlight for y’all)
Save the Villainess - Life got away with me and unfortunately I never finished my play of the demo BUT what I have played was fun and I hope to return to this in the new year!
Woman of Xal 2 - Plot Twist Studios is on that Sequel Train with the next installment of WoX!!! Which I'm VERY excited for!!! I've unfortunately only completed one playthrough of this game, but the first game is definitely a masterclass in replayability, and I hope next year I'll be able to do a second playthough as I wait for game 2's Kickstarter!
...
And that's 2024! Any shared favorites?
- Gemini 🫶🏾
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tvheadfalls · 1 month ago
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been wanting to play around w pokemon ocs and remembered i could repurpose bailey. im imagining nettle just finishing the main campaign of a region while bailey was off basically doing the professor oak dex challenge. bailey where have you been. i havent seen you in weeks.
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rocknrollsalad · 28 days ago
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rating: m that feels over cautious but i'd rather be that then under cw: making out with strangers, drinking tags: rockstar!eddie, waiter!steve, no upside down au, eddie has game, I'm not sure how to tag this one word count: 843
written for @steddieholidaydrabbles prompt "midnight"
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“C’mon, in here.”
Steve is shoved into a dark room, it smells like an attic, an old lady’s house, or a thrift store. It’s enough to make Steve give a couple of coughs but he doesn’t have time for anything else. The other guy is pushing Steve to the back of what he assumes is a closet, kicking the door closed so the thud of Steve’s body and the latch of the door hit at the same time.
His shift drink isn’t enough to have his head spinning like this. Steve grips at the wall to find balance and bring himself back to earth.
It takes seconds to get the stupid bow tie on the ground, Steve helps the other unbutton his crisp, white dress shirt and tries not to regret the choice to wear an undershirt. Usually, his tips are better without but Steve was told this party was a big deal.
The guy was famous or some shit. Steve didn’t know him or the band he sang for. Which made running into him that much weirder. Thankfully someone, somewhere along the line told Steve whose house they were at because he’d really hate to be whimpering the wrong name right about now.
“Eddie…”
The sound made Eddie press against Steve, trapping him against the wall. “Thought you didn’t know who I was, gorgeous.”
All Steve could do was sigh. The comeback would hit hours later but, in this state, his brain couldn’t supply his address let alone witty retorts. Instead, Steve slid his hand up the ragged, ripped band tee Eddie wore and held on tight.
Moving like this was something he did with every waiter, Eddie firmly planted his leg between Steve’s. He licked along Steve’s collarbone and made Steve’s hand grip tighter, a desperate move to not show everything that did to him.
This was a level of desperation Steve wanted to feel ashamed about but instead, he wanted to rip his clothes off…then Eddie’s. Of all the casting couches Steve was warned about, he didn’t expect to want to get on his knees for some metal band singer and the promise of nothing in return.
Eddie laughed; it was the most devilish thing Seve had ever heard come out of another human. His hand easily wrapped around Steve’s neck and he didn’t apply any pressure but patiently gauged the reaction. In the dark, he couldn’t see the challenging stare but Steve kept his breathing even and waited to see what came next.
With a graceful move, Eddie’s hand slid up until his index finger rested under Steve’s chin, tipping it up, and dark or not, Steve could feel Eddie’s eyes on him. Not watched or appreciated but consumed. It was a warning of what was to come. Or a promise.
After a long second, Eddie moved in for a kiss. The hunger behind it took Steve’s breath away. He writhed against the wall and against Eddie’s knee. Every wire and synapse fired, rushing in this beautiful overwhelmed feeling that Steve could get addicted to.
His arms wrapped around Eddie’s shoulders, holding on and desperately trying to get them those last centimeters closer.
“So needy,” Eddie panted.
Steve’s cheeks flushed for being called out but who could care in a moment like this? The guy was gorgeous and the way he’d argued with Steve out in the dining room was better than any foreplay Steve had ever experienced. He both hated and loved the guy.
However, the hatred slipped some as Eddie seemed hellbent on turning Steve into a puddle of goo, unable to do anything other than moan. Something Steve was usually doing to others.
“Fuck you,” Steve muttered, no bite and barely saying the words without stuttering.
Again, that delightfully evil laugh followed and Steve knew he'd lost. No one would ever compare to this guy.
As if dishing out torture, Eddie slowed down and kissed Steve. There was a passion behind it that matched what Steve was feeling, a devotion and request for this to happen for the rest of time. More than that, it was a reprieve, Steve was able to catch his breath. If only slightly.
Together they moved, making out like kids who’d been pushed into the closet at some basement party. Something Steve felt a little more familiar with. Desperately trying to please rockstars was new but seven minutes in heaven was old news.
Eddie pulled his shirt off and Steve took advantage of that pause to let his shirt fall to the floor. Before they could pick back up, “Happy New Year” came from every voice in the other room. Followed quickly by a chorus of noisemakers and tiny explosions.
There was a silent, still beat in the room as Eddie and Steve tried to process the information. Eddie leaned forward after a second and kissed Steve again, something quick as he pulled back and said “Happy New Year.”
All Steve could do was laugh.
“Yeah,” Eddie agreed, and a dry chuckle came around the word. “Fuck that. Let’s have some fun.”
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chiropteracupola · 16 days ago
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poster for the hungarian release of the 1951 hornblower movie; which is cooler than anything that happens in the hornblower movie
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pjs-everyday · 3 months ago
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pinky got 'em cat-quirked for fun, here are her thoughts!!!
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quinton-reviews · 1 year ago
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Jokes on you, I never had integrity
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librarisxng · 1 month ago
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ATEEZ SMALL PERFUME REVIEW: DIPTYQUE — L’OMBRE DANS L’EAU
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disclaimer: this is not meant to be a serious perfume review, this is something fun for me to do as I love perfume. each and every one of us have different tastes and preferences when it comes to fragrances. what works for me might not work for you, vice versa. I’ll try my best to describe the scents but I will always suggest for you to go and smell them yourself before purchase. if you want to try these perfumes, please test or get a sample before committing to the bottle. picture credits to all owners.
ateez member: wooyoung
fragrance family: fruity floral
notes:
rose, blackcurrant buds, petitgrain, blackcurrant leaves
my scent experience:
the fragrance opens very earthy, I’m guessing from the petitgrain, and blackcurrant leaves as it smells like wet leaves. it reminds me of the smell of petrichor and the leaves after it rains. as it settles, it still smells earthy but the rose is very present, so you smell like a lush garden. the dry down surprisingly was light and sweet from the blackcurrants and the scent is similar to their popular Baies candle. I said surprisingly as I hardly come across lighter fruity notes in the dry down. think of it as an earthy wet rose scent that becomes a little sweet later on.
the projection is okay, it’s quite subtle so if you’re looking for something that stands out, this isn’t for you. as this is an edt, the longevity isn’t that long, lasting approximately 3 hours on me. if you like or are familiar with their Baies candle, you might like this one. I personally wouldn’t call this a fruity floral but more of a green floral scent so don’t purchase this thinking it’s a fruity and summery concoction I don’t really trust fragrantica.
additional notes from me:
I think of Wooyoung as someone who likes clean and herbaceous scents that aren’t too strong (according to his collection) so I was a little surprised that he has this in his collection, but Yeosang bought it for him as a gift so it kinda made sense as to why he has it. it’s on the sweeter side of Diptyque’s perfume catalogue but it still has that green scent that just screams Diptyque to me. I’ve been getting into earthy scents as of lately and I’ll always be a fruity perfume girl at heart so combining the two was while an interesting experience, I do like how it smelt throughout the time I wore it and would consider purchasing a bottle — maybe the edp for longevity.
who would I recommend this to?
anyone who likes earthy and floral scents.
those who like their best-selling Baies candle and want a perfume version of that.
anyone who wants to try out Diptyque fragrances.
if you’ve made it to the end, thank you for reading this review!! this is going to be my last review before christmas so if you’re reading this before then, I wish you happy holidays and I hope you celebrate this wonderful period with your family and friends. I will upload one more review before the year ends so, please look out for that one!!
review written by librarisxng 2024
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noahschnappinfs · 1 month ago
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a glimpse of noah in chloe’s new tiktok
23/12/2024
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optimisticsposts · 2 months ago
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ferrarer17 · 5 months ago
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Not sure who thought it was a fail??? But you can’t please everyone!
(Mild spoilers)
Overall, I thought it was good. We got the relationships we wanted (lovers, sisters, best friends) and the conversations that were needed. Lots of laughs, lots of heart stings and plenty of action.
It wasn’t quite the ending I was hoping for, but the good thing is, it has definitely left the door open for another.
Melanie was amazing as ever, going seamlessly between sarcastic and emotional.
Dom’s progression in themselves was evident and so good to see that Emily allowed it to continue into their character. They are as sassy as ever and very funny. (I lost count of the amount of times they mentioned Nicole’s fingers…)
Doc’s character was a bit confused I thought. He clearly loved Wynonna but he didn’t seem sure of who he was. I felt it meant he didn’t have that spark he normally does.
Kat was adorable as ever and her comedic timing was on point. She was tough, soft, funny and loving and I was happy she still had the ‘little mermaid vibes’.
I will do a much more detailed review soon, I just don’t want to post too many spoilers as there will be so many people who haven’t seen it yet.
If you haven’t, strap in, it’s a great Earper ride!
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majoresca · 5 months ago
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Holiday in Enchancia
I know that Cedric didn't appear in this episode, which I find strange.
If the royal family had asked Cedric to use his crystal ball to find Roland's location while he was missing, they wouldn't have needed to go looking for him in a blizzard and risk their own safety.
Maybe a locator spell would even end up finding him.
I don't think Cedric would have neglected to look for Roland, even if they weren't such good friends anymore.
Indeed Cedric wanted the throne, but I don't think he would be so cruel to let his childhood friend get lost in the snow to die, especially considering that in addition to being king, Roland is also a father of a family.
The script could have given an excuse that the crystal ball was being interfered with by the blizzard, and that it wouldn't be able to find Roland accurately.
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tamapalace · 28 days ago
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2024 Year In Review
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2024 was a great year for Tamagotchi, it was our second year with the Tamagotchi Uni, and of course the iconic return of the Tamagotchi Connection! This year brought a record number of collaborations, software updates, Tamaverse Tickets, and Gashapons! For 2024, since so much happened, we are only going to focus on the big news.
01/03/2024 Tamagotchi Adventure Kingdom is Now Available on Apple Arcade! After being announced in December, 2023, the Tamagotchi Adventure Kingdom Apple Arcade application officially launched in the Apple App Store in early 2024! It was really exciting to see this game launch, and it has consistently received positive reviews.
02/17/2024 Bandai Namco US & Premium Bandai USA Announce Easter Themed Tamagotchi Original Shells This was a first, and we really enjoyed it! Bandai Namco US announced exclusive Easter 2024 themed Tamagotchi Original shells. Six shells were announced, and they were exclusively available on Premium Bandai US!
03/25/2024 New Tamagotchi Original Shells Advertisements in Japan’s Train Stations An impressive campaign was launched back in March, 2023 in Japan located at Shinjuku Station! It was to help spread the word about more western Tamagotchi Original shells being released in Japan. This was one of our favorite memories of 2024!
04/01/2024 Bandai Namco US Pulls Tamagotchi Connection April Fools Prank Bandai Namco US had jokes, huh? We had no idea that this April Fools joke would foreshadow a future announcement. The prank showcases a removable Tamagotchi accessory to add to your Tamagotchi Original, giving it the Tamagotchi Connection/Keitai antenna. Well played, Bandai Namco US!
04/11/2024 Bandai Japan Announces Hello Kitty 2024 Tamagotchi To commemorate the 50th anniversary of Hello Kitty, Bandai partnered up with Sanrio again to release another Tamagotchi Nano! New shells, and two new characters added to then programming which were Neliatchi and Shykutchi!
04/11/2024 Bandai Announces Tamagotchi Uni Sanrio Characters & Tamaverse Ticket Sanrio Characters Another Tamagotchi Uni! The Sanrio Characters Tamagotchi Uni was announced, and it served up a new color, a new faceplate, and of course a new Tamaverse Ticket! The most exciting part was that this would soon be announced as a global release, for the first time ever!
04/23/2024 Detective Conan Tamagotchi Nano Colorful Bandai Japan officially announced the very first Tamagotchi Nano Colorful, after teasing an announcement with Detective Conan on social media. An updated Tamagotchi Nano, but this time in color, and a rechargeable battery with USB-C connectivity. Super exciting to see Bandai partner up with Detective Conan again!
04/25/2024 Bandai Teases Possible Tamagotchi Connection Re-Release OMG, we remember this one like it was yesterday. Bandai drops a teaser for an upcoming Tamagotchi release. The teaser video was reminiscent of the Tamagotchi Connection V3 commercial. We were all on cloud 9.
05/13/2024 Bandai Introduces the Tamagotchi Connection with a 20th Anniversary Global Re-Release After years of outcry from the community, Bandai officially announces the return of the Tamagotchi Connection for the 20th anniversary. THIS WAS HUGE, and it still is. We finally have our Tamagotchi Connection back, and that makes our heart happy. Six shells announced globally, with two returning from the early 2000’s, and four shells were announced for Japan, with all four of them being updated shells from the originals released back in the early 2000’s.
05/28/2024 Bandai Announces Tamagotchi Uni Angel Festival & Tamagotchi Uni Monster Carnival More Tamagotchi Uni’s! We didn’t know at this time but this release was foreshadowing the return of the angel! Bandai announces two new Tamagotchi Uni’s, Angel Festival and Monster Carnival, along with their respective Tamaverse Tickets! Gorgeous new shells, and some new characters.
06/02/2024 Inside the Bandai Namco Store American Dream Mall Grand Opening Bandai Namco US opened the first very Bandai Namco store in the United States! That’s right, on May 31st, 2024 the first store was opened in the American Dream Mall, located in New Jersey. We were so excited to attend the store opening, and meet Asaki Murakami! This is where #MelonSodaGate all started!
07/11/2024 Bandai Japan Announces Hololive Fantasy Tamagotchi Nano ColorfulThe second Tamagotchi Nano Colorful is announced! This time, it’s collaboration with Hololive Fantasy, a group consisting of video streamers! Four new shells, with matching plushies are announced.
08/31/2024 Inside the Tamagotchi Booth at 2024 Tokyo Toy Show After a big year of announcements, Bandai Japan took their latest Tamagotchi goodies to the 2024 Tokyo Toy Show. Showcasing the new Tamagotchi Uni Sanrio Characters, Angel Festival, Monster Carnival, and of course Tamagotchi Original in all your favorite shells, along with the iconic return of the Tamagotchi Connection.
10/17/2024 Bandai Namco US Announces Tamagotchi Original Angel at “Fun With Tamagotchi” 2024 New York Comic-Con Panel This announcement was incredible to witness in person! At the 2024 New York Comic-Con Bandai Namco US hosted a “Fun With Tamagotchi Panel” were they announced the return of the Tamagotchi Angel, under the name “Tamagotchi Original Angel”, which features generation 3 programming. Two shells were announced, and fans all over the world rejoiced! Another return for 2024!
10/17/2024 Bandai Namco US is Bringing Melon Soda Tamagotchi Connection to the United States After we spoke to Asakai Murakami at the Bandai Namco Cross store opening at the American Dream Mall, and the launch of #MelonSodaGate, Bandai Namco US officially announces the Melon Soda shell! That’s right, for the first time ever Melon Soda is now available to purchase in the United States. This was a HUGE win.
10/31/2024 CHOGOKIN Tamagotchi Robot This was major! A collaboration of two Bandai brands, Tamagotchi and CHOGOKIN to bring the CHOGOKIN Tamagotchi Robot! A die cast metal robot with a Tamagotchi nested in it’s chest, the community is loving this one!
2024 was incredible, and there is so much to celebrate. The biggest highlight had to have been the return of the Tamagotchi Connection, which holds such a special place in our heart!
We couldn’t image celebrating Tamagotchi without our amazing fans. We are looking forward to an even better 2025, so stay tuned to Tama-Palace for the latest and great Tamagotchi news. Happy New Year!
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poppletonink · 5 months ago
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FILM REVIEW: Roman Holiday
★★★★★ - 5 stars
"What the world needs is a return to sweetness and decency."
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During her grand tour of Europe, an adventurous, young princess escapes into Rome during the middle of the night. While she explores the city, she falls in love with an American journalist.
Roman Holiday is a light-hearted, adorable romance with a bittersweet ending. It takes the viewers by the hand and guides them down the streets of an ancient and tremendously cultural city. Be prepared to consult TripAdvisor, because, after an hour and fifty-eight minutes of watching Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck's dazzling love affair, you will most certainly feel the need to travel. The film encapsulates the beauty of Rome through a classy and glamorous lens - black and white in colour and yet brimming with emotion. It shows the human desire for thrilling escapades and freedom from the constraints imposed upon us - be it through work, school or, as in the film, our living situation. Regardless of whether riding on a motorbike, daring fate at the La Bocca della Verità and eating gelato in Rome is your idea of freedom, these actions incite a hunger for adventure within viewers.
This cult classic film plays with many tropes including, but not limited to, 'the important haircut', 'the bet', and 'the rebellious princess'. While many tropes are used to fuel the drama and plot of the film, others add to its cathartic and fun nature. The most notable use of a trivial trope is when Princess Ann has her hair cut into a pixie cut - though an act of rebellion and freedom, it shows spontaneity and relatability in her character, making Roman Holiday even more entertaining to watch.
Having defined the very nature of the genre over the past seven decades, Roman Holiday is a must-watch romantic comedy and perfect for a vintage film binge.
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howlsmovinglibrary · 5 months ago
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holiday book round-up
(a wrap up of everything I read when I was away!)
wylding hall by elizabeth hand. (4*)
Daisy Jones and the Six, but make it fey and spooky. This was the best novel I read whilst away. The remaining members of an acid folk band try their best to recollect and reconstruct the events that led up to their lead singer's mysterious disappearance, in the grand manor known as Wylding Hall. what happened to Julian Blake, and who was the mysterious girl he vanished with?
small miracles by olivia atwater. (3*)
this is one book the good omens girlies might consider getting into, given recent... stuff and things. the concept (a tense alliance over party lines, governed by the fate of a single soul) has a lot of overlap, only with a lot more women involved.
I am *not* a good omens girlie, so it took me a while to get into this book as much as Atwater's fairy stuff. but as always, she writes incredibly compelling character and romance dynamics. i shipped the main pairing so hard by the end.
a marriage of undead inconvenience by stephanie burgis. (2.5*)
I thought this novella would be written specifically for me (an arranged marriage between a headstrong lady academic and a sarcastic posh vampire... iykyk). But unfortunately, I think it was too short to get to fully enjoy it's own premise. I found the academic rivalry subplot more compelling than the romance, I guess bc that's an easy dynamic to set up in a short space of time.
the biting, though. Stephanie gets it.
where the dark stands still by a.b. poranek. (2.75*)
This book combines a lot of the good things of Howl's Moving Castle, Uprooted, and Shadow and Bone. If you like any of the above, you will probably enjoy this! But it does not - in my opinion - surpass any of them.
It was a fun read, with some stand out sentences, and also some extremely derivative ones, that kind of meant everything flattened out overall. And, alas: I'm always wary of third person present-tense, in the hands of edgelords.
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