#his lectures SUCK
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lord-squiggletits · 1 year ago
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One of my favorite parts of phase 2 (and indeed one of the few moments I resonated with IDW Prowl) was when the neutrals were coming back to Cybertron and Prowl said that he refused to let Autobots be pushed aside and overruled after they were the ones who fought for freedom for 4 million years (the exact wording escapes me atm).
And I mean, that resentment still holds true even once the colonists come on bc like. As much as it's true that Cybertron's culture is fucked up, and as funny as it can be to paint Cybertronians as a bunch of weirdos who consider trying to kill someone as a common greeting not important enough to hold a grudge over.... The colonists POV kind of pissed me off a lot of times, as did the narrative tone/implications that Cybertronians are forever warlike and doomed to die by their own hands bc it just strikes me as an extremely judgemental and unsympathetic way to deal with a huge group of people with massive war PTSD and political/social tensions that were rampant even before the war?
Like, imagine living in a society rife with bigotry and discrimination where you get locked into certain occupations and social strata based on how you were born. The political tension is so bad there's a string of assassinations of politicians and leaders. The whole planet erupts into an outright war that leads (even unintentionally) to famine and chemical/biological warfare that destroys your planet. Both sides of the war are so entrenched in their pre-war sides and resentment for each other that this war lasts 4 million years and you don't even have a home planet any more. Then your home planet gets restored and a bunch of sheltered fucks come home and go "ewww why are you so violent?? You're a bunch of freaks just go live in the wilderness so that our home can belong to The Pure People Who Weren't Stupid And Evil Enough To Be Trapped In War" and then a bunch of colonists from places that know nothing about your history go "lol you people are so weird?? 🤣🤣 I don't get why y'all are fighting can't you just like, stop??? Oh okay you people are just fucked up and evil and stupid then" ((their planets are based on colonialism where their Primes wiped out the native populations btw whereas the Autobots and OP in particular fought to save organics. But that never gets brought up as a point in their favor)) as if the damage of a lifetime of war and a society that was broken even before the war can just magically go away now that the war is over.
Prowl fucking sucks but he was basically the only person that pointed out the injustice of that.
And then from then on out most of the characters from other colonies like Caminus and wherever else are going "i fucking hate you and your conflicts" w/ people like literal-nobody Slide and various Camiens getting to just sit there lecturing Optimus about how Cybertronians are too violent for their own good and how their conflicts are stupid, with only brief sympathetic moments where the Cybertronians get to be recognized as their own ppl who deserve sympathy before going right back to being lambasted.
Like I literally struggled to enjoy the story at multiple points because there was only so much I could take of the characters I knew and loved being raked over coals constantly while barely getting to defend themselves or be defended by the narrative so like. It was just fucking depressing and a little infuriating to read exRID/OP
#squiggposting#and like dont get me wrong barber wasnt trying to make cybertronians the bad guys or whatever#it's just a problem with his writing where like. he has A Message he wants to send#and so he uses the entire story literally just for The Message even if it involves bullshit plotlines#or familiar characters ppl were reading about for the past decade being shit on by OCs made up to fill a new roster#like barber's writing tends to lean way too much on a sort of lecturing tone#without giving proper care towards including moments where characters get to like. fucking express themselves and share their side#sort of like how barber couldnt be bothered to write pyra magna and optimus actually talking to each other during exrid#and instead during OP ongoing pyra is suddenly screaming about how OP is unteachable#even tho she never even tried to teach him bc she and OP never interacted bc i guess barber couldnt be bothered#he just needed someone to lecture OP so fuck making the story make sense or like letting OP get to say anything in defense#this is the infuriating part of barber's writing bc i think he has incredible IDEAS and was in charge of the lore i was most interested in#but most of the time his execution sucks and he's basically just mid with a few brilliant moments occasionally#or like he has a message about the cycle of violence he wants to convey#but his narrative choices trying to convey that theme made his story come off as super unsympathetic to the ppl who suffered#to the point where barber actively kneecapped some scenes that couldve been super fucking intense and emotional#in favor of the characters lecturing each other or some stupid plot to criticize OP#that time in unicron where windblade screamed about how this is their fault and then arcee replied that her planet is build on coloniation#shouldve happened more often than literally the last series of the ocntinuity. like goddamn stfu about your moral superiority#when your own sins are right fhere lol
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thelilylav · 17 days ago
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"Tell me every terrible thing you ever did, and let me love you anyway."
Darabella they could never make me hate you <3
#belle was NOT my first kin for y'all to disrespect her daughter the way you do#“they weren't written well” NO RELATIONSHIP IN THIS SHOW IS WRITTEN THAT WELL#this show sucks at writing romance guys i hate to tell u this#the books write romance well but the show... gets so questionable#pls lets blame the screenwriters and not my babies i just want these two to be happy#i used to be OBSESSED with their relationship when i first watched the show it was so sweet#also rosabella used to mean so much as an awkward nerd who could never tell when i was lecturing ppl and cared too much abt the environment#some ppl aren't being condescending they're just kinda socially stupid y'all she's fifteen we can like.. take a deep breath#hold hands in a circle. idk#this is all said without hate like the criticisms are warranted but it gets to be a lot sometimes#so thought i'd put some actual content of them in the tag lol#eah#ever after high#rosabella beauty#daring charming#darabella#web weaving#eah web weaving#also i really do think they're a good match they just get brought together awkwardly#cause rosabella being able to tell daring he's a good person and his looks don't matter#after he's gone through like two back to back existential crisis#and him actually listening to her and taking her advice to heart#when ppl usually view her as overbearing and tune her out#like they're just built for each other yknow what i mean?#and the way they go from annoyed w the other's presence to listening and learning from each other#and ultimately making the other better is just... aghhh i love them#gonna also add quickly that the hate has died down which has been very nice to see#and i think ppl r generally getting a more neutral opinion of them#so no one take the rant at the beginning of the tags too deeply pls lmao
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reallapiscake12 · 9 months ago
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I occasionally see the idea of a "normal jeff au" where Jeff never became a killer and was just a regular dude
and usually these aus just have it where the incident with Randy never happened and Jeff just continued to live out his life normally. Now that idea is cool and interesting but i had a thought, what if Jeff's a normal dude AFTER the incident. Like instead of his mom going immediately to the idea of a late abortion she gets help for her son and he goes back to being a (slightly) normal kid, so you just got this 15 yr old in highschool looking like a half dead corpse doing algebra and running track or whatever kids do edrfgfdfvgb what would life be like for Jeff i wonder, would kids continue to treat him harshly or would everyone be afraid of Jeff? Or would they just pity what he gone through or just treat him normally. How would his family life be affected by the events of Randy.
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wubbybubbly · 5 months ago
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I find it very funny that eden academy is a prestigious institution known for its excellent schooling, but when it cuts to anya in math class, the instructor’s just like, “this and this are like this, and that’s why this turns out like this. and this is this. this gives you this answer, and you can use this method to get this answer over here.”
brilliant.
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iceyrukia · 7 months ago
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For a good portion of women, their lives are too attached and intertwined with men to ever actually hold them accountable. It's why so many women's anger is subdued or they look the other way when men act like scumbags - all of this meek behavior all because in their back of their minds they want a future where they're on good terms with men and that means not being to "harsh" on them or else they won't have that.
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wizardofvamp · 3 months ago
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Assorted footage of the average Fairhaven session:
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volfoss · 7 months ago
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The fact I'm 20% through this book and like maybe 3 things have happened at most... We are SO back in Anne Rice exposition dump hell forever and ever
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1o1percentmilk · 11 months ago
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i love my security prof he's like if suzuki touichirou was real and wasnt a terrorist and gave lame ass computer security lectures instead
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qeyond · 2 years ago
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So. B and A getting super high together. B has an insanely high tolerance and A only smokes maybe once or twice a semester, if studying allows. A has a Horrible high and is super on edge and anxious, but B makes them feel really safe so they're not completely bugging out. B is just vibin' and having fun, but also being a bit of a Shit Disturber. Keeps bringing up creepypastas and A ends up sitting snuggled up super close to B on the couch with their arm around B's. A being all "heyy this is getting really scary :(" and B being like "haha, oh I'm so sorry~. We can talk about something else..." and A getting relaxed and :). But then B interjects: " So yeah... you know The Bathroom Head?" and A shoves him and is all ">:((!!!! LISTEN!!! ITS SO SCARY, OKAY!! I HATE YOU!!!" They're both laughing and it's very soft and intimate, but in a very queer found family kinda way.
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the-winds-of-destiny-xxx · 1 year ago
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neonacidtrip · 1 year ago
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I am home from apartment hunting and I would just like to say I am extremely disappointed, as an able-bodied person, to learn only 1 out of the 13 complexes we visited had an elevator.
#like i can take the stairs its whatever i guess#but something i had on my checklist was accessibility#one place had wheelchair ramps but it doesnt do much when you have no elevator#apparently its florida law that a building less than 4 floor isnt required to have an elevator#but then all the buildings are less than 4 floors?!?!?! disgusting#my boy tried to placate me by reminding me that we are able-bodied which turned into me lecturing him#that able-bodied people have to advocate for disability rights#it also pissed me off because both his mom and my mom have issues with stairs#and ive told him many times i dont like using the stairs because there are never cameras in the stairwells#not to mention one of our main goals is to make new friends once we move and those friends might be disabled#we ourselves may become disabled one day. i already have joint pain. its super easy to break a leg#its sickens me that disabled people either have to pay more to live in a place with an elevator#or they have to pay more to have a first floor unit (yes in florida 1st floor units usually cost more)#also! most of the stairs were just plain gross! dirty and rusty and covered with mold#anyway apartment hunting is fun but largely sucks because theres so much to be disappointed by#several places just had trash everywhere. multiple wouldnt answer phone calls. one wont answer emails#none have cameras in the parking lot and had no policy regarding crime that occurs in their parking lot other than 'file a police report'#one place tried to convince us its normal to have roaches in the unit in florida even though only one place had them#we didnt even go into all 13 units because by the end my standards had gone up and my tolerance had gone down#so we left two places without completing the tour just because our reception was nonexistent and there was trash everywhere#my boy fell in love with a place with 1star ratings trash everywhere and a raccoon problem. send help#neo rambles#neo speaks#neo apartment hunts#apartment hunting#tw mold mentioned#mold mentioned#accessibility#disability advocacy#ableism
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messytoplipkisses · 2 months ago
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man
#i want to cry to someone everything sucks#normally it's fine that im never happy just living studying but kt gets so hard when im on my period#idk if it's real or if im making it up but i genuinely feel like crying for no reason#if i was at home i would lay down on my couch and eat a lot of unhealthy favorite food and my mom would talk to me about#some soap opera and i would only half listen and it would be okay#but here toh fr i feel like ill start crying in front of my dad if he keeps ignoring me to work or look at his phone#i don't even know what i used to do to make myself happy and god that's scary. i don't want to sink into sadness again#i know i should talk to my friend but why am i so scared. like every night i think ill do it tonight but then i just chicken out and go to#sleep. it's crazy whenever i do talk to her aftera lot of time i feel instantly better and i berate myself for not having done it sooner#but like. aah. im scared it's a lose lose like what if i do talk to her and it doesn't make anything better and then i don't even#have that last sliver of hope left. on the other hand#what if i do talk to her and it makes everything better and then i start relying on her and then she's not there when i need her again?#i hate being dependent on people it's so scary and you can never count on them to be there#i miss being a kid that clean happiness untouched by any other sad emotion and entirely independent#now it's like even if im happy im terrified of losing it and no thing is really enough#i wish i could just. not have emotions for s year. just till exams. i can't focus like this i keep spacing out between#lectures randomly tearing up for no reason#i don't know i don't know#oh it's day 2 of periods hopefully it'll all go away on its own it usually does#i hate this pcod bs so much cause like i get depressed twice once when my period is due but then it doesn't come but im still dep#and once when it actually does come like 10 days later#like bitch tf let me live
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a9saga · 4 months ago
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i wish my physiology professor assigned a friggin required text book. there's nothing wrong with a textbook. he assigns periodic word docs he wrote himself which cover all sections on the next exam. the current one we're on is 79 pages. his writing is so fucking messy, so unclear, and so unfocused. they're full of grammatical errors, unlabeled charts that don't make any sense, and the order in which he puts his key concepts could really use revision. like so many times, i'm reading one subsection and i'm like '.....why did he say this before that?'--it reads like he never asked a colleague, 'hey can you read my lecture notes and tell me if it makes sense?'
i've had other professors base their lectures and course work off of their own docs rather than a textbook. it's okay not to do that, i'm sure they aren't easy to write but it never occurred to me that someone would do that without being good at it. for his lectures, he just projects and skims the doc and paraphrases stuff, and for a lot of the shit in there he says 'don't worry, i'm not gonna test you on that' (????) which for me only blurs the lines on what small examples or elaborate tangents i will or won't be expected to know. the lectures feel anti-helpful and reading the doc myself feels anti-helpful. i spent half the summer reading a physiology textbook at work in preparation for this class. i can understand the topics according to the organization of a textbook. i do not understand his word docs. it feels like a waste of time.
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orionlancasterr · 7 months ago
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Sorry guys ive been sucked into the solas enjoyment but the problem is that i hate major fanon solavellan. I like the part of solas where hes got a constant need to be the smartest person in the room and is constantly holding secrets above everyone else's heads and making the inquisitor feel like the most specialist person ever until they disagree with him and then he's got to remind them how smart and wise he is but its okay because its not your fault youre so stupid.
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luveline · 2 months ago
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𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
Spencer gets a bad bout of amnesia. Or, your boyfriend forgets he’s your boyfriend, but he still has a crush on you. [3k]
c: fem, bombshell!reader, head injury, hospitals, amnesia, fluff, spencer can’t believe he bagged you, requested here 
˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚⋆
Spencer wakes to an empty room. 
He lays on a pillow too flat, neck twinging, the back of his eyes throbbing when he moves.
He struggles to breathe through his nose and lets his mouth open for a few achy breaths, his mouth dry like he’s been sucking on cotton balls. 
Spencer’s alarmed, without a clue what it is he’s done. He wonders where Gideon is, if the older man has come to see him yet. He hopes somebody told his mom he’s okay. 
Maybe Hotch will come. He and Hotch have grown closer while Gideon was on his mandated recovery time; Gideon spends far less time in the office, sticking to lectures, seminars and consults, while Hotch, Morgan and Spencer handle the away cases. Spencer might go as far as to say Hotch likes him. And Morgan can tolerate him now, less grudging when Spencer offers a random fact or statistic to further the case. 
A stab of pain at the back of his head makes itself known sharply.
Spencer doesn’t want to move, but he needs to assess things. He frowns at his arms, naked as they are. His silver watch is missing. A t-shirt that he doesn’t remember buying stretches over his chest. What state are they in, and who dressed him? 
He’s scowling at the window with it’s wide-open blinds and all the sun when the door opens. 
You’re looking at the bags on your arm as you come in. Spencer startles in his blankets —what are you doing here? Agent L/N, Morgan’s friend and a candidate for the open position on the BAU team. You’re from the Sex Crimes Unit, like Greenaway. 
Spencer flusters every time he sees you, not just because of how kind you’d been the first time you met, or even the easy flirtation you send his way when you cross paths. It’s because you’re the prettiest woman he’s ever seen. He’s not talking about the golden ratio or statistical beauty, you’re just stunning. You stop him in his tracks whenever you steal into the office. It’s better when you notice he’s awake and light up like he’s the winning numbers for tonight’s lottery pull. Everything about you illuminates. 
“Hey, babe!” you say, not not yelling as you drop your bags in the seat by the bed and reach for him.
He doesn’t think to move away as you take his face into your hands.
“I’m so glad you’re finally awake, you almost slept for the full twenty four hours.” Your hands are soft. They smell like neroli. When you stroke his cheek and lean down to give him a chaste peck, he almost passes out there and then. “It's a good thing, obviously,” you say, and then kiss him again distractedly. Spencer squeezes his eyes closed. “You heal more when you’re asleep. Or so I’ve heard.” 
You pull away, Spencer blinking for his life. You have such a nice mouth, but Spencer’s never thought about what it might feel like on his. He doesn’t have the audacity: in what world would you ever kiss him? That’s the joke, right, when you flirt with him in the office?
“How are you feeling?” you ask, losing some of your pep. “How’s your head, handsome? You know, there are easier ways to get a haircut.” 
“They cut my hair?” he croaks. 
“Shaved it at the back to stitch you up. Not much, don’t worry. They were pushing for a buzz cut but I put my foot down on that one,” you joke. You nudge his legs aside without worrying about sitting on him as you get comfortable. “It’s not much. You can’t tell.”
“I…” 
“You feeling okay?” you ask softly. Your nice mouth purses. Your eyebrows pinch. They’re cute eyebrows. 
“You look different than the last time I saw you.” 
He doesn’t mean to say it aloud. He’s noticing things now. You’re wearing less powder under your eyes than you used to. You seem to have gained a little weight, and you look good. You didn’t look bad before, but this is different. Your hair isn’t too different, nor your brows, but you’ve begun lining your lips in a new way. Your blush is a subtler hue. Spencer doesn’t claim to know everything about you, but he can say that you look neatly the same each time you visit. Why the sudden change?
“It’s hard to sleep when your favourite person in the world gets his head cut open,” you say, taking his hand where he’d left it loose in the blankets. 
Your fingers slip into his with ease. 
“Can I tell you something?” he asks, attempting to swallow his nerves. 
“Of course you can.” 
He licks his lips. “Uh, I think I’m confused. I don’t– I don’t remember what happened, and…” 
“Oh, right. They told me this might happen.” You draw yourself up with a breath. He’s fascinated by the movement, an air of heat around him as you begin rubbing the back of his hand with your thumb. “You got hit in the back of the head with a cinder block, honey. Went down like a lead balloon.” You turn your face to show your cheek. “We’re even now on good scares, yeah?” 
You have a scar on your face he’d missed, carefully concealed but yet not invisible. Your hand in his feels so alien he holds it wrong, fingers twined but palms apart. 
“What happened to you?” he asks. 
Your brow crinkles. You go very still. “My cheek?” you ask. 
“What…” 
“Spencer, what’s the last thing you can remember, honey?” you ask, all the horror in the world to be found in your eyes. 
“Uh…” He feels sick to his stomach.
“Spencer?” 
Without having to be told, you slip off of the bed with two taps of your shoes and reach for the bedpan, thrusting it into his lap. 
His mouth fills with spit. “I’m fine,” he says. 
“No, I don’t think so. Let me get a doctor.” 
“Wait,” he says, clutching the bedpan and pushing his wave of nausea as far down as he can. “Please don’t go.” 
“My face was months ago, honey. I got hit in the face with a hammer by a UnSub, you don’t remember?” you ask incredulously. 
“Why do you keep calling me honey?” he asks. He knows the answer, but it’s not computing. 
Your face drains of any happiness. “I’m going to get a doctor,” you say, shoulders rigidly tight as you exit the room, leaving Spencer in your wake wishing he’d just pretended he knew who you were, just until you kissed him again. 
“And he really can’t remember you at all?” Morgan asks. 
You’re a little less startled than you had been, and you’re trying not to punish poor Spencer, but realising your boyfriend forgot years of flirting, and yearning, and friendship —years of kissing in secret and otherwise, years of holding hands, and staying at each other’s places to get that extra time together, even if it was just getting to sleep in the same bed between cases— was a slap. 
“He remembers me,” you say, leg crossed over the other, arm over the railing of Spencer’s bed to hold his hand. “He just doesn’t remember a thing after Gideon came back, after Boston.” 
“I remember when you had hair,” Spencer says to Derek. 
Derek glares at him, “This Spencer doesn’t get to sass me.” 
“But I do eventually?” 
“How come you’re holding hands if he doesn’t know who you are?” Derek asks pointedly. 
You shrug. “We talked about it, didn’t we?” you ask Spencer, who perks up every time you talk, which isn’t unlike your usual Spencer. Whenever he catches himself doing it he flusters. Every time you call him baby he loses his mind. “He doesn’t remember me, but he wants to. And I remember him.” 
“This must be pretty weird for you, kid,” Derek says. 
“Sort of,” Spencer says. 
It’s funny. Now you know Spencer thinks he’s twenty three again, you can’t not notice his shyness and his awkward tries at casualness. You’d forgotten what he was like back then. 
“Wait, does that mean you don’t remember Emily?” Derek asks. 
Spencer frowns. “Uh, no?” 
You sit up in your chair. “Emily’s one of your best friends, honey. She joined the BAU when Greenaway left.”
“Not you?” he asks. 
You dramatise your pain as Derek laughs. “Not me. I didn’t transfer for a long time, unfairly. It’s okay, though, you’ll remember Emily eventually.” 
When you realised Spencer wasn’t as okay as you’d thought, you gathered a gaggle of agitated doctors to assess him. He knew his name and birthday. He was wrong about the date, the president, and the state. You’re in Arizona where he’d thought Indiana. Your bag talks to the heat: Spencer’s fan, his sunblock, his antihistamines. He couldn’t believe it when he asked where his stuff was and you passed him your handbag. 
You’re trying to drive home to him that you’re not just dating, you're common-law partners, Spence. He adores you. You’d spend life in his lap if you could afford it. 
“How’d she get you to believe her?” Derek asks Spencer. 
“Uh.” 
“I kissed him a couple of times before he came clean about the amnesia,” you say. “So I didn’t have to explain.” 
“I didn’t mean to lie,” Spencer says. 
He’s looking less haggard now you’ve brushed his hair. It was sweet to watch his shoulders relax. He shuddered when you tucked a strand behind his ears, and didn’t flinch when you asked if you could kiss his cheek. It’s hard to have him vulnerable here and not be allowed to lick his wounds for him. You feel better the better he feels. You’ve fluffed his pillow, wrapped him tighter in blankets. When he got up to pee and you offered to help, he gave a resolute No Thank You, which in hindsight is hilarious but at the time made you wanna squeeze your eyes out. 
“It’s okay,” you say softly, “I don’t mind kissing him, even if he doesn’t remember me. Just so long as he doesn’t mind it back.”
Spencer manages to squeeze your hand. It’s a soft one, but it’s real. “I don’t mind.” 
“You dog,” Derek says. 
“Stop, stop. He’s not doing anything wrong, is he?” you ask. “I’m the evil one, forcing kisses on him when he doesn’t know me.” 
“I do know you,” Spencer says. 
“What’s it like to have a crush on your own girlfriend?” Derek asks, unwilling to quit his teasing where he’s crossing his arms in the chair opposite, his cup of coffee drained on the side table. 
Spencer swallows. “Uh, nerve-wracking.” 
“Believe it or not, that’s not so different to now,” Derek says. 
Spencer looks to you for confirmation, which you love. You slide your chair closer to him and clasp his wrist with your free hand. “Sometimes you're still a little shy, but it’s not so bad. Full of myself I may be, Spencer Reid, but you do love me. It’s easy with us.” 
“Do we really live together?” he asks. “You said common-law.” 
“Not technically. I stay at your place four nights a week. You stay with me for the weekends.” 
“Every week?” he asks.
“Yeah.” 
“We’re never apart?” he asks. 
His face is turning pink. You could kiss every bit of colour on his cheeks. 
“Derek, would you get Spencer something to eat from the cafeteria? Please?” you ask, levelling your friend with a pleading gaze. 
Derek gathers himself up. “Sure. We gotta feed the string bean something, don’t we?” he asks. 
Alone again, you draw lines up and down Spencer’s arm with your nails. You’re going to be indulgent in yourself, and ask him everything you’d ever wanted to know. And then a little extra, too. 
“You’re not as skinny anymore, have you noticed? You’re quite lean.” You stand to sit where you’d put yourself before he confessed. Your hand falls to his knee. “Solid, sometimes. You and Derek go for walks occasionally.” 
“We do?” 
“Mm-hm. And me and you do yoga in the living room when we can summon the energy. We tried couples Pilates, but Pilates is hard.” 
“We did?”
You smile warmly. “It’s nice to be in love with someone who loves in the same way.” 
“How do you love?” 
His ears are bitten-red. “Oh, you know. I’m too affectionate. It’s hard not to be with you. Everyone used to think we were… I don’t know, playing a game.” You slide your hand up his thigh, leaning on him to watch his pupils blow. “But I love you for far more than your constant propensity to blush. You get me flowers every time you see my favourites, and you never let me go to sleep without a kiss. Usually here.” You poke the skin beside your eye. “But sometimes you’ll surprise me and kiss my nose.” You're going lax with love, remembering things he’s done, and does every day.  “On a Saturday morning we make tea and I put my hands in your t-shirt. You do the crosswords for fun. Sometimes we time them.” 
“That’s not how you love, that’s what you love,” Spencer says. 
“Oh, you want a play by play of things?” He ducks his chin, but he smiles when you laugh. 
“I just can’t believe this is happening.”
You try to think of things you don’t think about anymore. “You love my sugar lip gloss, so I always wear it.” 
He reaches out tentatively. Shy as a wren in a hedgerow. You let him curl a hand over your elbow, feel the crook of it with his index finger. 
“I buy you stamps, and t-shirts for bed, and stupid stuff you wouldn’t get yourself. We’re… it’s like, it doesn’t feel like gift giving anymore because we’re always getting stuff for each other. You’re just as sweet, you know? When I first started sleeping over you bought me this huge pack of socks ‘cos yours are all odd,” you laugh. “I knew I loved you already, but…”
It’s a little sad, actually. He can’t remember all the stuff that makes you the couple you are. It’s not what you’d meant to get into. 
“Can I ask you something?” you ask. 
“Anything.” 
He’s slept-in and breathless, like he ran laps in his dreams. 
“What do you think of me now? I always wondered if you liked me back then, or if I just caught you off guard.” 
“Who wouldn’t like you?” 
“But did you?” 
He looks away hurriedly, his hand dropping from your elbow. “I guess so. But it’s not– not real. I have a crush on you.” His mumbling is sweet. “I have no idea why I’m telling you that.” 
“I had a crush on you, too, back then. It wasn’t anything serious, but it wasn’t a joke. And the more time we spent together, the more I thought we could fall in love,” —you take his hand and put it back on your arm— “and we did.” 
You toy with his fingers. Without looking, ashamed of your own self-indulgence, you ask another question. “What do you think of me now?” 
“I can’t remember,” he says sorrily. 
“What do you think?” 
“You feel like a dream.” He shakes his head. “You’re the most beautiful girl in the world. I don’t really get how this is real.” 
You shouldn’t be surprised that he’d say it, you practically begged for it, but you can’t stop yourself from sitting up to kiss his forehead gently. “It’s real. Promise. And for the record, you’re handsome. They stopped saying ‘aged like fine wine’ a while ago. Now they just say ‘aged like Spencer Reid’.”
He gives a choky laugh. 
The door opens again. You lift your head expecting Derek and find a weather worm Hotch in the doorway. “Reid, you’re awake,” he says, not bothering with a smile. “Morgan said you have amnesia?” He directs it at both of you. 
Spencer’s looking at Hotch in clear shock. 
“He hasn’t aged that badly,” you chastise teasingly. 
“Hotch, you’re– I thought you would’ve– You’re still–?”
Hotch squints. “You didn’t think I had the stamina for it?” 
Spencer squirms under his gaze. “No, sir, it’s not that–”
“Sir,” Hotch says, and then he smiles. “I forgot when you both used to respect me.” 
“I have the utmost respect for you, sir,” you say through your own smile. 
“Has she been kind to you, Reid?” 
“Uh, yes? Is she not usually?” 
Hotch presses his lips together rather than answer. There’s a sympathy in his expression you resent.
It’s a thankfully quick bout of amnesia. The memories start to draw in like a dusting of powdered sugar, his head finely silted, one particle at a time. He finds that the more you talk, the quicker his memory is jogged. You tell him about your first kiss —I tried to kiss your cheek but you moved, it was the funniest thing— and your second. You spin stories of cases, the worst ones and the best, all the times you held hands without people knowing, the times you’d been caught. He can’t imagine it, goes hot with the memory, picturing kissing you as you’d described and the mortification of being walked in on. 
You tell him about your vacation to Nevada a few months ago and he thinks about how you’d fallen asleep on the plane. Your nose in his arm, your unhappy sigh at the tight leg space. 
Remembering you is more than half of remembering himself.
Your hands —his hands. Your smile —his laugh. The way you fold his hands in your lap —the urge to catch your chin for a kiss. 
He doesn’t know how to deal with it, and then suddenly he feels like Spencer. Your partner, your love, his proudest title for years. You’re standing at the end of the hospital bed in pajamas folding your clothes, allowed to stay the night while he’s so urgently confused and upset, you can’t make him stay here alone, please, I know you guys have those little cots for the kids ward, and he just knows you completely. 
Hours of diligent if embezzled storytelling gives it all back to him. 
“I like the lipgloss because you used to wear that perfume that smelled like sugar donuts,” he says, scratching a hand through limp hair. “And every time I crossed the square by the station–”
You let out a surprising squeal of joy. “Spencer!” you say, racing to take his hands, “Yes! The donut truck!” 
You go in for a kiss he gladly returns. “Oh, you remember,” you say, softening as he takes your neck into his hand. “I was getting worried.” 
“Some of it’s still hazy, but not so much you.” 
You wrap your arms around him for a hug, careful of his sore head. “I missed you, Spencer. I still loved you when you couldn’t remember me, but I missed you. Do you remember you?” 
He traces the scar on your lower cheek with his thumb. He’s genuinely relieved to be able to say he does. He’s not scared of what you think of him anymore, ‘cos he knows that everything he feels for you is mutual. “I remember you telling me my bad feeling was just a case of the heebies.” 
You bend into his touch. “Honey, I’m sorry. How was I supposed to know you’d get your skull whacked with a cinder block? It was a bakery. I thought the worst that could happen was getting a face full of red velvet or something.” You kiss his nose quickly. “I’m so glad you’re you. Now I can sleep in the bed with you, and not that collapsible camping cot.” 
He shushes you. “Don’t give us away. They’re not gonna let you stay if they think I’m fine.” 
You giggle excitedly, arms around him again for another squeeze. “I missed you so much. You’re so devious now.” 
He rubs your back. “I missed you too. And I still have a crush on you, I swear.”
“Thank you, honey, that means a lot to me.” 
˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚⋆
thanks for reading!
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g-k444 · 13 days ago
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Uni professor that makes me come earlier n sit on a specific chair every lecture? Every lecture there's a new toy on it which i need to stuff into my pussy and endure over the course of the lecture?
front row seat, legs crossed over one another as everyone walks in and says hi and gets to their chosen seat. And once they're all sat down, im expected to open my legs up so that the prof can see my stuffed pussy beneath the desk whilst he lectures - teeth flashing with the sadistic smirk he wears each time that he looks over and sees me with eyes squeezed shut, doing my best not to make any noise
Sometimes when he feels particularly cruel, he'll call me out by name and say pay attention. In extreme cases of cruelty, he'll ask me to answer his questions and listen to me stutter to jog my brain and look past the pleasure to answer his questions.
The toys vary each week - one time it was a thick dildo, another time a bullet vibe to shove up my cunt. One time it was a butt plug of which the professor could control the vibrations of from his phone.
Of course, I then also need to wait until the end of the lesson before i can leave. Otherwise, everyone would see me get up with strings of my own cum extending from the chair to my sopping pussy as I get up.
No, instead I wait for everyone else to leave.
Then the professor can tell me to turn around and touch my toes so that my skirt flips and he can observe my pussy, stuffed with whatever odd object he'd decided to use on me that week.
Then what? Well, maybe I'll get fucked in the lecture room - at the very front - so that it feels like everyone's watching me. Or, maybe he'll tell me to suck his cock because he's tired to lecturing with a boner from watching me on the front row. Alternately, he might even tell me to go sit on his desk at the front and myself off for him using the toy, before making me lick all the slick that drips from my pussy off of the desk with my tongue
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