#him and ian were having a spam off | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

justforbooks · 8 months ago

Text

Nicholas Shakespeare’s elegant biography of the James Bond author Ian Fleming takes its subtitle from a journalist’s observation, quoted halfway through, that its subject was “for a moment of time, a complete man” while working for British naval intelligence in the second world war. Yet you can’t help read it as a promise to give the reader what was left out of previous biographies such as John Pearson’s crisp, more portable authorised life from 1966. And is there a claim, too, for the alpha male credentials of the man called “Flemingway” by his friend Noël Coward? Journalist, stockbroker, thriller writer and – like his famous creation – a playboy and 70-a-day smoker, who died of a heart attack in 1964 at the age of 56 after a plagiarism row over the origins of Thunderball, the ninth Bond novel.

After a dutiful account of how Fleming’s Scottish financier grandfather became a millionaire – later cutting Fleming and his brothers out of his will – Shakespeare gets going with his subject’s troubled boyhood in the shadow of his father’s death in the first world war. Family friends in Switzerland take his education in hand after hasty exits from Eton (hanky-panky with a woman) and Sandhurst (gonorrhoea). His exams aren’t good enough for the Foreign Office; an engagement to a Swiss lover ends amid maternal threats to cut off his allowance. He falls on his feet at Reuters – it was that kind of life – further honing his knack for a scoop at the Sunday Times, a handy source of contacts for his war work.

Testimony woven from diaries, papers and interviews gives the book a flavour of oral history. Shakespeare goes to great lengths – not least tracking down a 94-year-old veteran, the last surviving member of a covert commando unit that Fleming organised – to dispel the idea that Fleming’s service, occluded by state-sanctioned secrecy, was just “in-trays, out-trays and ashtrays”. The book’s first half puts the future author at the heart of military and journalistic history – a search for German weapons of mass destruction; the race to get an inside scoop on the Cambridge spies – as well as the bedroom shenanigans of the English well-to-do. (Shakespeare, who encourages us at one point to smile at the mention of a “germanely” named Nazi admiral, Assmann, shows his assumptions of his audience when he writes confidently of “that small, turn-of-the-century intellectual clique, the Souls”.)

Fleming may be “the man behind James Bond”, in the subtitle of Andrew Lycett’s 1995 biography, but Shakespeare’s project, you sense, is partly to say there’s more to him. Eager to prove Fleming’s interest beyond the reasons that will draw most of his readers to the book, he is almost comically insistent on the degree to which his subject was ahead of the curve. Not only might he have sparked the idea of creating the CIA – in a memo written when the US-UK special relationship was being forged – but he also came up with the idea of putting a Christmas tree from Oslo in Trafalgar Square.

As for the dozen Bond novels that poured out of Fleming after 1953’s Casino Royale – written in a month in his winter bolthole in Jamaica a year earlier – they were, in Shakespeare’s telling, essentially the literary expression of a midlife crisis accelerated by the encroachments of fatherhood and a faithless union as the third husband of Ann Charteris. They had got together with an affair that caused a high-society scandal during her previous marriage to the Daily Mail heir Esmond Harmsworth; she later cheated on Fleming with the Labour leader Hugh Gaitskell, who told him that the “sex, violence, alcohol” formula of the Bond novels was “to one who leads such a circumscribed life as I do, irresistible”.

Fleming, injecting the American dirt of Mickey Spillane’s Mike Hammer novels into the English thriller, launched 007 on what Shakespeare calls the “spam-munching gloom of Attlee’s Britain”, writing (Fleming told his publisher) in order to make “as much money... as possible” and to have “as much fun as I personally can”. Respectable sales rocketed when JFK took a shine to From Russia, with Love – and the movies were yet to come. While Fleming was self-deprecating – telling Raymond Chandler the Bond novels were “straight pillow fantasies of the bang-bang, kiss-kiss variety” – he was proud enough to greet the director of the first Bond movie, Dr No, by telling him: “So they’ve decided on you to fuck up my work.”

“Luck had to be accepted with a shrug or taken advantage of up to the hilt,” Bond thinks in Casino Royale; he sees luck “as a woman, to be softly wooed or brutally ravaged, never pandered to or pursued”. Squint enough and Fleming took some care to cast his main character in ironic light. Early in that novel, the reader gets a fly-on-the-wall thrill of watching fieldwork in action, with the scene of theatrical care Bond takes to ensure his hotel room isn’t being searched; but soon enough his French sidekick turns up to let Bond know his upstairs neighbours have been listening in to his every move.

In Shakespeare’s biography, the novels are mostly a source of supporting quotation – he doesn’t get bogged down in questions of what it means to read Bond now, confining himself to a remark on how his “cavalier treatment of women... carried the sexual climate of the Blitz into the austerity of the cold war, and was less modern perhaps than it was later cracked up to be”. And perhaps there’s no need for his defenders to overstate the case for Fleming’s novelistic subtlety. Bond has always been shaped by a collective amnesia that allows us to make him what we wish him to be at any given moment; when he parachuted into the Olympic opening ceremony with the queen, it was as the best of British, not as a connoisseur of (Fleming’s words) “the sweet tang of rape”.

The novels, in a way, are irrelevant to 007, but the course of history would surely have run otherwise had Fleming not had the foresight to change his protagonist’s name from the original “James Secretan” – Fleming’s typescript revision perhaps his most significant literary act.

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at Just for Books…?

#just for books #Ian Fleming: The Complete Man #Nicholas Shakespeare #book review

19 notes · View notes

turtlesnails · 9 months ago

Text

I don’t want to lose you again

Alex gets a phone call from the hospital saying that his uncle was in a bad accident. Except, Ian Rider died four years ago...

T+, Alex Rider Fandom ( Alex Rider - Anthony Horowitz, Alex Rider (TV 2020)), Alex & Yassen, Pre-slash Alex/Yassen

Written for @shehungthemoon prompt for @alexinchainsfest

~7k words, No warnings apply, Light Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Medical Inaccuracies, Sickfic,

Preview under the cut:

Alex was already running late to his university class when his cell phone started to ring.

He reached into his pocket intending to turn off the phone's ringer, assuming that the incoming call was from Jack, Sabina or Tom. They were the only people who kept in contact with him regularly.

It was an unknown number, with a 115 area code, Nottingham if Alex remembered correctly. It was likely a spam call; someone trying to sell him something or waste his time. Ian always said to never answer them, plus if it was really that important whoever was calling could just leave a message.

And- Alex stole a glance at the time, if he did not get out of here in the next minute he would miss his train.

There was just something odd nagging at him. Alex pulled the slightly burnt piece of toast out of his mouth and pressed down on the answer button.

“Hello, May I speak with Alex Rider?” The female voice on the other end of the line spoke. Whoever this unknown number was…well, they knew who he was.

“Who is asking?”

“I’m Sarah, a nurse at the Queen’s Medical Centre in Nottingham. I am calling for Alex Rider?

“What?” Alex responded rather confused. Why would a nurse from a hospital miles away call him on this dreary weekday morning. Heck, why at all? It’s not like he had an appointment up there. “Uh… This is him.”

Alex slid himself onto one of the high stools. He did not know anyone in Nottingham. Jack and Sab were both in America, Tom was or should be in his Uni classes. None of them were anywhere near Nottingham. His mind briefly flashed to Ben Daniels. It had been months, almost a year now, since he had spoken to Ben. Ben might have been from Birmingham or Manchester. But if it was Ben…. Alex would have expected Wolf or Crawley to pass the news on to him.

“Well Alex. I’m calling regarding your loved one, Ian Rider. And, I wanted to inform you that they have been admitted to our hospital.”

“What the fuc-“ Alex started to respond before catching himself, “Sorry. I just am really not expecting this. You said my uncle, Ian Rider, is in the hospital?”

“Yes. I know the news can come as a bit of a shock,” She continued, “He was involved in a serious accident when his motorbike collided with oncoming traffic. He listed your name and phone number to the medical personnel at the scene, before being med flown to Queen’s Medical center. He is currently in the Intensive Burn unit at the hospital. I am calling firstly to inform you of his condition but also because you are listed as Ian’s medical proxy, and legally are able to make decisions on his behalf for treatment.”

Alex ran a hand through his hair. It was unbelievable. There is no way Ian is still alive? Or was there? It was a closed casket at the funeral. Ian or even Alan Blunt could have faked his death. Four years…

It was a long time. And, if Ian was alive why didn’t he try to make contact with Alex before that? Why would he just abandon him? Especially if he knew Blunt and Jones would take advantage? Alex felt just a bit angry.

“Alright,” Alex repeated, turning his focus back to the phone call, “What happened? And what do I have to do?”

“Firstly, Ian has suffered from second and third degree burns on his right side. The third degree burns extend through the entire thickness of his skin, are more challenging to treat and may require skin grafts. He also sustained a head injury. We’ve conducted relevant diagnostic tests which showed swelling. Our main concern here is increased pressure on his brain from his skull. But, we need consent in order to do surgery.”

“My consent, right?” Alex asked

“Correct. We also want to make sure that you know the procedure, the risks and the benefits, along with answering any questions you might have.”

“That is the best thing to do, right? That’s what the doctors are recommending?”

“The sooner we reduce the swelling and pressure on the skull the better.”

“Alright, yeah do that. I’m definitely not going to make it to my class today…. You said Nottingham?”

“Yes, that is correct.” The nurse responded.

“Good. I’ll be on the next train up.” With that Alex ended the phone call, and pondered what had just happened. He felt nauseous, like the room was spinning way too fast around him.

On one hand, Ian could be dead. There was always a chance that there are two Ian Riders with the same birthdays in the UK- maybe the other Ian had a nephew named Alex. Alex was a common enough name. So was Rider. On the other hand, Ian could be very much alive. Which brought Alex full of emotions. If he was alive why did he wait four years to contact Alex, why was he in Nottingham, and why didn’t anyone tell him? A thought dawned on Alex. Maybe they did not even know Ian was still alive.

(Continue reading on AO3)

#ao3 #fanfiction #alex rider #yassen gregorovich #ao3 fanfic #AlexinChains

12 notes · View notes

theboysfromaustin · 6 months ago

Text

Excerpt from The Dogman of Detroit: How I Inadvertently Became an Urban Legend by Gav Mitsuwa-Gabriel.

----

This was my first time staying out longer than overnight. It had been three days, but I knew from experience my family would often ignore me for a week at a time, occasionally sliding plates of food scrap under my closed door. I think the longest was a week and a half, at which point my mom screamed at me, yanking me out by the arm, telling me to “be part of this family.”

Which is both awful and grimly hilarious in hindsight.

I don't know why I'd go back. Perhaps I thought there was some shred of hope that something would click and we'd become the Cleavers. I was in an abandoned neighborhood - I don't recall which one, but half the houses were burned out. Houses that were lit up were allowed to burn themselves out - his was no man's land, and emergency services weren't going to respond for some derelict heap. More than once, I'd sit on top of a house and watch another be burned to its foundation by bored teenagers.

I mean, I was a teenager, but I was looking for food, and occasionally trying on women's clothes. I was young and trying to figure out my sexuality - my son-in-law is a drag queen, so I get it. Anyway, I'd found a house that hadn't burned or collapsed, and I was on the hunt for food I could add to my supply cache, which was split between under a tree in an abandoned lot, and under a floorboard that was under the mattress in my room.

So, I was sorting through canned goods, wondering who actually liked peas, when I heard it. There were sounds that sent me into escape mode, namely approaching vehicles and voices, but this was different - it was a low growl. I froze - I hadn't had much dog experience at this point, but I knew it was a warning.

I'm not afraid of dogs by any means, but I do respect the hell out of them.

I turned, still holding a can of SPAM, to see a large pit bull in the doorway. “Hey, buddy.” Another growl, the dog lurching forward unsteady. In the dim light, I could see he was bloody, torn up, “It's okay.” His eyes were glassy as I slowly popped the Spam open, taking a handful. I knelt, offering it to him, “C'mon, boy.”

With a groaning whine, he stumbled forward, taking the food. Carefully, I stroked him, hand immediately covered in blood, “You're a good boy.” His tail wagged weakly, and my heart hurt for him - he wasn't going to make it. His neck had been opened up, and I could see deep gouges of exposed muscle. I emptied the can, letting him eat. The dog whined softly, leaning on me, and I picked him up. He was very light, and I headed for the first floor bedroom. The bed still had blankets, and I lay him there, crawling in next to him.

I refused to let him die alone.

He lay his head down, eyes open as I stroked his fur. Even bloodied and beaten, he was a beautiful dog, a rich red brindle, undeserving of his fate. I know dog fighting is a huge problem in Detroit, god knows I buried enough of the victims. “You're such a good boy. I love you. People really screwed you up, but you still trust me. You…” I swallowed hard, “You can go now, you don't have to hurt. Good dog. Such a good boy.”

The dog sighed deeply, tail thumping softly. I kept my hand on his side, feeling his breathing gradually stop. I cried for this poor dog - at this point, I didn't really have a great grasp on death or any composure. Still don't, as an adult, Ian was the last, but he trusted me as the executor of his will, so I had to pull myself together.

I carefully wrapped the dog in a blanket, and found a hand shovel and some old wood scrap from a burned house. I'd found a pocket knife, so I could carve it as a marker. My parents would have killed me if they knew I was going to give a dog a proper Christian burial.

I threw what I could in the backpack I'd found my first time out, picked up the dog, and began heading for a lot that wasn’t far off. The digging was the worst part, honestly. The sun was starting to go down, so I had to work fast, having no flashlight. At night, in those areas, you didn't want to draw attention to yourself.

I managed a hole about two and a half feet deep, big enough to place him in and still have decent coverage. The dirt didn't fill it all the way up - never does, so you're left with a bit of a divot in the earth. “You were a good dog, and I wish I could have helped you. I hope my bit of kindness eased your pain.”

Then I stared at the piece of wood. He needed a name, a strong name. I began to carve a name for him, I wasn't letting him die nameless.

The first of the animals I buried - Lazarus.

#oc #original character

1 note · View note

philza-updates · 3 years ago

Text

Phil was in early gang earlier today and added a new bot, Fossabot, to moderate chat! He had early gang help him out with testing the bot!

[Image ID:

13 cropped screenshots of several twitch chat messages by Philza. They read:

who wants to be a lab rat

boop

ok someone say something dumb that people say in chat when my friends are streaming KEKW

Imao

well it's ignoring a lot of keywords thats not good lemme take a look

ok quick test

someone type this next phrase

is live

boop

ah I fixed it i think 2 secs

ok here we go

im gonna set it to only time you out for 1 second if it works

dont type the same message twice

ok go

so some ve messages are silipping through, will fix that

fixed

maybe tioming out people for simply saying "raid" is too harsh KEKW

I added the "v c" varient

the idea is people should get the message

and be timed out for 10 minutes

so cant spam new alternatives

theres also a 1 man spam fiolter which i hope shouldnt nuke people in the intro spam KEKW

but we’ll see

k ive added some more phrases

1 more test should do it

we can add more after streams if we find new stuff

ok go

say stuff that people spam in chat when my friends are live etc. KEKW

1 second timeouts

pfft

oh thats a good one

sick of beggers asking for subs

cant be too specific with people just saying "gifted" Imfao

version 1 of fossabot yeeting idiots is a go I think

adfded "notice me" KEKW

ok added "shoutout" too

shoutout might be too much Imao

removed

I can have fossabot send a message to the chatter about what they said but dunno if thats too mean

and too spammy

nobody reas whispers

reads*

haha banned the blue and green hearts

cos lets be honest, who tf uses those if not being a weirdchamp

@/CRUNCHYGIO pepeW

pffft

removed "call" since it could be too powerful

fossabot is now going live, it will time you out for 10 minutes if you say those phrases we filled it with

back to watching GDQ

peepoSmile

https://www.twitch.tv/gamesdonequick

top left KEKW

wtf got you guys timed out now KEKW

why KEKW

i switched it to 1 sec to test

its the v an c

Imfao

ok fixed

that was too powerfull

lol now its timing you out for saying the same thing over and over haha

it looks at your last 3 messages minumum in the last 3 minutes and if they're 75% similar then BAP

yeh the 1 man spam thing might be too powerful too, I can see it yeeting intro spam

kinda like when I enabled it on streamlabs ages ago

everyone got bapped

fuck it do a test for intro spam

Imao

maybe i just turn it off i guess

tuming bot back on for the keywords to 10 min timeout

seems fine for now we’ll see in stream KEKW

that sonic run on GDQ was a world record this is so cool

wearing a sonic suit too KEKW

boop only works for me, I was testing if fossa was in chat 5:18:46 pm Philza: test

fuckin fuck

wanted a button on my streamdeck for r9k

just for potential bot raids, instead of sub mode

Follow me on twitter https://twitter.com/Ph1LZA KEKW

Follow me on twitter https:/twitter.com/Ph1LzA KEKW

Follow me on twitter https://twitter.com/Ph1LzA KEKW

bahahahahhaa

stream deck you are too fun

Follow me on my socials! https://twitter.com/Ph1LzA - https://www.tiktok.com/@ph1izatiktok- https://www.instagram.com/ph1lza

Follow me on my socials! https://twitter.com/Ph1LzA - https://www.tiktok.com/@ph1lzatiktok- https://www.instagram.com/ph1lza

dude ian i added so amny keywords that will time people out KEKW

IT ARRIVED BatChest

my nintendo switch

OMG BatChest

NO WAY BatChest

Imao

End ID]

#ph1lza #philza #mcyt #image id #no id in alt text #sorry for how late this is i got interrupted by stream #mod luna #long post #he spammed the socials promo A LOT btw #him and ian were having a spam off

66 notes · View notes

saintobio · 3 years ago

Note

Hi! I decided to sign in this time. I hope you're taking care, staying hydrated and rested! I re-read SN and it was quite the journey! I have to say I'm a bit annoyed at everyone annoyed at Y/N right now. I know that what she did was selfish but did they forget about Gojou's emotional abuse? His neglect? His infidelity? The fainting spells, angina attacks and low self-esteem it caused? I really respect his redemption arc but it took a lot to get there. 1/2

Also, you're such an amazing writer, I'm still in awe! I wanted to profess that I'm still staunchly tojixy/n. I think that people have multiple soulmates, and I love their banter and the way they're alike in their selflessness and kindness. Either way I know you'll make a beautiful story. I'm excited for the tojixy/n scenes even if they don't end up together. My theory is that she'll cancel the wedding, get back with Satoru and decide they're better off as friends, and then get with Toji instead

I'm sorry for spamming you cuz character limit. I just had a few qs: what does Gen think about Y/N marrying Toji since she doesn't like Satoru now? Do people care about their age difference since he's a decade older? Do you think Gojo's love for Y/N developed because she helped him recover from his trauma? If he'd sought therapy instead, I wonder if things would be different.

gen trusts toji since he and ian go way back, plus she’s mostly ok as long as the man won’t deliberately hurt her sister. no, not many people care about their ten-year age gap since they’re both grown adults.

also, gojo has always loved yn tbh. we know he lost a part of himself after his mom’s abandonment / father’s abuse, but being married with yn made him remember the kind of solace he used to seek from her when they were children — which also ended up reminding him of his affections for her.

thank u for reading !! and yea, well people have varying opinions abt the ending bc i meant for yn to do something drastic that is equal (or much worse) to what she experienced from gojo. it was kind of like her breaking point where she just decided to act rashly and selfishly for once — though it was also something that would haunt her back in the future.

that’s why to me, i’d rather put the blame on both sides rather than blaming one more than the other. but also i’m unbiased bc i’m the writer haha

#saintobio.asks #series: sincerely not

92 notes · View notes

g--r-e--e-n · 4 years ago

Text

The Crow

A late Mammon x GN!MC for the Max thingy!

Warnings: It obviously talks about a crow, just in case. The ending might seem quite rushed, I'm sorry, it was already too long :(. No spoilers, everything is before the MC's actual arrival to the Devildom.

Loud music echoing all around your house, singing and dancing like a madman through the corridors like it was no body's business, mopping the floor and trying to make something nice out of your free days.

Everything was perfect, just the way anyone would have always liked it. Yet, somehow… It felt empty, bitter, almost painful.

It hadn't been long since you and who you thought was your other half broke up. But you couldn't allow yourself to feel sad, not now.

You're young, you're strong, and you have a lovely future. You repeat it over and over, trying to turn the music louder than any thoughts you may have. It might not be the easiest thing to do, but trying won’t murder you, will it?

Finally there was not a single shadow of dust in your apartment. Not that there was anything before, but it helped keeping yourself busy. Now, finally, you only had to get rid off all the rubbish you somehow managed to collect.

You reluctantly turned off the music and made your way to the bins. Luckily, they weren't too far away: It was a cold, rainy day, and you'd rather stay at home instead of fighting the wind with your little umbrella,your hair a mess and your socks now wet.

Your day couldn't really get worse, yet you started doubting it the second you saw something dark moving in between feral pieces of litter someone didn't care about enough to throw correctly.

For a second you started believing in ghosts and God knows what but,soon enough, you saw a crow's deep black feathers, a painful caw breaking through the air like a thunder.

It was hurt, hungry, wet and cold. You could see how it bended it's right wing, unable to fly, a poor creature begging you with it's eyes, deep as the galaxy, were you clearly saw yourself, wet hair sticking to your face, comfortable yet not too fashionable clothes, eye bags hanging from your eyelashes, as pitiful as the poor bird in front of you, even if your wound was emotional rather than physical.

You didn't think twice before throwing your own raincoat over the creature, knowing that holding it with your bare hands would be rather dangerous.

Soon you headed home, crow surrounded in plastic like some bizarre newborn baby. It seemed to be weirdly docile, given its nature, but you soon learned to give it its space, holding it away from your face, barely able to keep the umbrella over your soaked bodies.

As soon as you get home, you lay him down carefully, keeping an eye on him and slowly getting rid of your wet shoes and reaching your phone.

The bird seemed scared, but it didn't move, eyes staying fixed on yours, its screams sounding more like begging than dangerous.

You soon sent a message to your good old friend Liam. Sure, Google is interesting, but Liam is your neighbor, a vet, and you've known him for years. This is not your first time rescuing feral animal in danger, so you knew for a fact you can rely on him.

Soon, he messaged you back, telling you that he's on his way with a cage so he can take the crow to the clinic. You couldn't help but chuckle, of course Liam wouldn't allow you to take the poor little thing in your arms, knowing how it could reduce your skin to vaguely human-flavored threads.

However, this also left you with a couple minutes alone with this somehow magnificent king of dumpsters. After observing him from a while, you walk backwards towards the kitchen. As soon as you could, you reapeared, hard bread on your hands and a smile on your lips, seeing how the bird stood still. Not that he had much option, of course. His right leg didn't seem too fine either.

Breaking a small piece of bread, you carefully and pretty cowardly throw it at the crow, thinking it would land before him, but being rather amused by the way the creature just catches it ever so quickly.

When Liam came, you had almost ran out of bread, and both the crow and you seemed so engaged in the game of throwing and catching that you barely realized the young man walking into the room, hair wet and a miracously almost dry cardboard box that you supposed was originally meant for holding fruit at the market,

You almost jumped when you heard him call you by your name, but soon your fear turned into a warm and welcoming hug, never minding his cold body, or how the crow ruffled its feathers, wishing it could growl in this pitiful form that barely managed him to caw drily. Something about the tall brunette slowly stroking your lower back managed to piss it off.

"Oh my God, you are such a mess!" Happily, and always positively, saluted you Ian. At times you feel like he doesn't really know when he's not supposed to be sincere, but not wanting to keep your new little friend waiting, you decide to keep your big mouth shut. "So... Where's our guy?"

His bright smile calms you down a bit, but its effects are quickly reversed by how the crow clumsily tries to run away, jumping on its one functional leg, only tangling itself with the raincoat still surrounding it.

Liam gives you a raised eyebrow. "I know I told you not to touch it too much, but a blanket would've been nice, you know?"

You simply shrug it off, not wanting to admit that you got too distracted feeding it to even be a decent human. The crow apparently agrees with Liam, because suddenly it's easy to move around again. You probably thought it was simply a funny coincidence, because, well crows are clever but, as far as you know, not THAT clever.

Who would've thought a poor demon would've gotten cursed by some witch? Not you, or not seriously, at least. As much as you love those sort of themes, reality doesn't allow them to become true.

A crow is just a crow, as clever as it could be. Not more, not less.

“Whatever. Let's do our thing, it's getting so late..." You softly sighted, eyes slowly dancing towards your window, the sky getting darker every second. Too invested in cleaning your bad memories out, you had barely realized how time had passed. Did you even have lunch?

If Liam noticed the brief sadness in your expression, he decided to leave you be, carefully holding the injured crow before leaving him in the cardboard box. The bird moved, cawed, yes, but he didn't seem to put too much of a fight. After all, Mammon might be a fool, but he'd much rather get back to Lucifer as soon as possible, thank you very much. Hanging upside down is not a pleasant experience.

Soon you were silently in Liam's car, the box resting in the backseat. Your friend's warm brown eyes were fixed in the road, but you both knew each other too well. He knew you were having a bad time. You knew he was plotting something.

"You know, after we drop our new son..." He softly said, taking a turn to the right. You braced yourself, both for his harsh driving and the proposal in coming. "We could go to the club, like in the good old days."

You softly laughed it off, even knowing Liam would easily catch the bitter feeling growing in your throat. "You know I'm trying to save my money, Liam. It doesn't grow from trees."

"I mean, technically..." He shrugged, turning now to the left. Even if he was being particularly gentle in order not to turn your feathery friend into a smoothie, you still had to stop yourself from screaming when the car almost ran over an elderly lady. "C'mon! There's a zebra cross like... Eleven meters away?!"

You slightly turned, sighing in relief seeing the crow is still safe.

"What I was saying" Liam continued, much to your dismay "I can pay for you, you know? I'm gaining some good cash now, and I don't have that many expenses. Plus, I'm pretty sure I owe you one from back in highschool."

A faint, but at least genuine laugh was thrown into the air as memories came back. Summer nights lying in the sand, gossiping and laughing, having a good time. "You dummy, that was ages ago! I just... Don't feel like going anywhere crowded."

"What about my place then? I've got some nice cheap booze. You look like you could use it."

He teasingly flashed you a bright smile before finally hitting the brakes and getting off the car. It was hard, but you managed to get out without fainting along the way.

"Well, thank you very much sir. You too look alluring" you sarcastically commented, before going to pick up the crow that stared at you so firmly with its jet black eyes that you felt the void within them could shallow you entirely any time.

Mammon doesn't have the best attention spam, or any sort emotional intelligence, but bring money to the equation and it may just change.

The human was short on money. Something Mammon, of course, understood very well. The human, even if a lowly human, had also saved him.

His little braincells were working hard, wondering if it was right to do what he thought to do. What if you were some terrible person underneath? What if you were a witch looking for a pact?

Luckily, he didn't have much time to drown himself in conspiracies, for soon he wad bring brought to the vet, and, by the way he was moving around, he did not enjoy it.

"Oh, C'mon, buddy..." You softly complained, struggling to hold onto the cardboard while Liam opened the clinic's door, fighting against the key. "I know it hurts. Just... Hold on a little, alright? Be a brave little boy for me"

You smiled at the crow, Liam suddenly laughing his soul off, loud enough for you not to pay much attention at the effect your words had had on the poor creature emiting broken caws.

"Do you always have to do that?" He mercilessly mocked you, finally opening the door and holding it for you, mainly because your arms were too busy, both with the crow and the hard fight against yourself to keep you from strangling Liam. "Come in, leave it on my table and wait outside, alright? Here, get yourself some coffee."

He absent mindedly thew you a coin. When Liam entered the clinic, he was no longer your dear and annoying friend Liam. He was the doctor. And the doctor was very cool at doing his thing, but pretty much useless at anything else.

Useless enough to throw a coin to someone holding a crow.

Of course, you couldn't just drop the guy or get the coin with your mouth like some dog, so you simply stared at him waiting for the realization to kick in. However, to your surprise, the crow threw itself as the coin, with as much grace as a bird with a wounded leg and wing can throw themselves at anything, which is, sadly, not much.

Luckily you did manage to keep him from failing, a soft smile flourishing as you saw him holding onto the coin.

"Please? I want to finish soon, the rum won't finish itself tonight." Liam was now in front of you, slightly surprising you. Trying your best to hide it, you hand him the crow. He simply sighed, struggling a bit to take the coin out from his beak, holding it out to you while taking the crow like a perfect choreography. "There you go."

You exaggerated an angry face as he petted your head a few times, managing to keep the animal in one arm like it was just natural before disappearing after the door.

Liam didn't like having you around while he works, specially if he knows it can involve anything even a bit gruesome. But this time you simply feel the need to be there with the pitiful crow, to help him and bring some hope into his beautiful eyes that seemed ever so intelligent.

The loud caws only made it worse, so you decided to get some coffee into your life.

Coffee at the clinic is bitter and far too strong, but Liam insists it's the only thing keeping him from falling asleep after specially complicated shifts.

You didn't really think twice before chugging it down, regretting it immediately. You were already nervous enough, why add caffeine?

You soon began wandering around the waiting room you knew so well, roaming next to the door to try and catch a glimpse of what could be going on in its guts. Liam is a good bet, but, what if something had gone wrong? What if it was not fixable?

A crow is not something you can keep in your house, is it? What would you do then? The closest animal rescue center is so far away, but perhaps you could take a few days off your obligation. After the whole situation with your ex, it’s very much needed.

Your constant thinking was soon relieved by a softly smiling Liam walking in with the crow resting in the cardboard box, looking all over like it too felt uncomfortable there. Its broken wing had been carefully wrapped in what experience told you was coflex. You couldn’t see his leg, but it must be in a similar situation.

“Our little man here has beheaved just fine” Liam said, softly. As much as he always made fun of how you spoke to animals, he was not that different. I mean, he did dedicate his whole life to this, didn’t he? “He should be able to fly in… Perhaps two weeks? It’s not a multiple fracture, which is rather relieving, but who knows.”

You slightly frowned. You did expect something similar, of course, but you wouldn’t normaly expect a bird with a broken wing to be half as lively as this one had been. A part of you admired his strenght, yes, but the other one felt simply curious.

“What about the leg?” you softly ask, bending a bit to see the creature eye to eye, barely saving enough distance to ensure your safety. “It couldn’t walk. What is it?”

“Give it around five or seven days and he will be walking all over” He tried your best to cheer you up, so you decided to at least gift him a little smile. “And he even seems to be eating well, so no need to worry, alright?”

You noded, standing up again to throw the empty cup of coffe in the bin, its bitter taste slowly dissappearing from your mouth as this new, warm feeling took you all over.

“So… Your house, right?” You flash Liam a smile while taking the crow carefuly. It seems to struggle against it for a bit, but soon relaxes. What else could it do?

Liam didn’t even bother to confirm what you already knew to be true, as he opened the doors once again and you stepped outside, the night’s cold air against your skin. Before you even realized it, you were siting in his kitchen, the crow resting on the counter, warm tears on your face, the burning feeling of alcohol down your throat… And dedscending through a rabbit hole of blurry memories and complains.

Trust me, there are many things you regret. But getting ever so wasted is deffinetly within the number ten.

You wanted to keep on with your life, you wanted to do your best, to show yourself you didn’t need any “other half” to be completed. You know, being active and stuff, putting yourself together.

But here you were, laying down in your bed on a Saturday afternoon, staring at your ceiling in pain and hunger, too hangover to even sit up and absolutely obliterate the bird that was screaming so loudly. God, that surely is another big regret of yours right now.

Still, you didn’t have the heart to let it starve, not again, so you slowly roll out from bed, holding your head with your hand, the same clothes you wore yesterday all wrinkled around your body.

“I know, I know.” You complain as if the bird knew what you were saying, too naive to realice he, in fact, was. It didn’t take you long to cross your rather small appartment to reach the kitchen, were you apparently dropped the bird yesterday, not that you remember much about it. You lazily searched for the bag Liam had given you, filled with sunflower seeds and… Crickets?

You look at the bird, hesitating a bit before sighing and walking towards it, leaving the open bag for it to eat and, hopefully, not get your floor too dirty. It seemed to be pretty hungry, as it devoured his meal without a single complain, quicker than ever. After all, Mammon was used to eat before Beelzebub could even dream of stealing his dear fuel.

Oh, how he missed his brothers. What could they be doing? Perhaps they didn’t even realice. Perhaps they were happier that way. He has always been “the scummy second born”, after all, so isn’t it a favour to dissapear like this?

You didn’t quite understand what was going on, but you did realice the way the crow’s eating speed decayed. Before struggling a bit against yourself and your huge headache, you spread your arm towards the bird, not daring to touch it, relieved when it didn’t seem too keen on murdering you, at least by the moment.

“Come here, little guy…” You carefuly stroke his head a few times. It seemed to enjoy it, but you still felt a bit too insecure to maintain the contact for too long. “You will be flying again in no time.”

You soon went to do your own thing, drink your pretty late breakfast, sit by the counter and silently tink of some name for your newfound friend. Little did you know this was but the start of a very wicked story.

The bird, who, to Mammon’s dismay you had called Liquorice, proved to be a rather interesting company, even when he could not move that much for the first few days. You found yourself spending most of your free time playing with him, or even telling him your deepest of secrets, not like he could judge you.

It was relaxing, no façade to be held, not a lie to be uttered. It was Liquorice and you, and it felt perfect. Either way, seeing how clingy he slowly grew to be, it’s not like it was one sided.

In four days the crow could already run around, and it seemed to want to look outside. Of course Mammon loved your company, but he was still worried. A part of him thought it was foolish, that nobody would miss him, but he knew Lucifer far too well.

Seeing how his wing wasn’t still healed, you decided to accompany him to his little walks all over the town’s outskirts, and it seemed to even strenghthen your relationship. You still cound’t be anywhere with people or vehicles, but fresh air was nice enough to make your black and white world broaden a bit.

Days passed by quicker than either Mammon or you would’ve thought, too lost in your little shennanigans to even mind the clock. Soon the crow was able to fly, as you discovered when it leaped from the fridge to the hallway, happily cawing around.

At first it was a happy moment, and you soon sent a hundred videos to Liam to show him how the little crow was doing so well. However, soon both of you had to face a realization: His time here was over.

Liquorice was a wild animal as far as you were concerned, of course, and you did not have the guts to keep him trapped. Not after knowing how that felt. However, something inside you felt uncomfortable with the idea of seeing your house empty again. Mammon, of course, also felt uneasy, but for very different reasons.

You see, for you this all had been helping a very funny crow. But he was a tad more conscious of the whole situation, and trust me, it was putting him through hell. Sure, he wanted to return to his brothers, but… What about this human?

He tried to convince himself this was just him wanting to protect a weak being as a “thank you”, but his lie was too obvious to ignore. He had seen you at your worst, in the nights when you drank alone and talked for hours about someone he simply knew did not deserve you. He had seen you at your best, dancing all across your house when you recieved any good news, cooing at him when he did even the smallest of things, like it was a great archievement you could barely believe. You had hold him close, you had kissed the top of his head, stared for ages into his eyes, not realizing the effect none of your actions had in him. He had slowly started to care, and he was not enjoying that idea, but what could he do?

He’s just a crow, and now that there’s no excuse for you to keep him around, it’s his time to go and dissapear, turning into a vague memory. God, why did he feel so impotent now?

You both struggled against yourselves in silence, until you came up with an idea.

“Let’s give it a day, alright, buddy? Just to see if you still remember how to move those wings of yours”

You showed him an empty smile he could tell from miles apart, but he couldn’t do much about it, drowning too deep into his own feelings.

The following day, both of you stayed at home, playing your little games of fetch, you laughing at how the crow beheaved almost like a little puppy, him silently swooning over the sweet sound of your laughter, almost forgetting the bitterness of the situation until night actually fell and it was time to close this wonderful little adventure.

You were both lying in the living room when night came, exhausted from running around, breathing heavily with a big smile to your face like it didn’t hurt.

“You know… I think it’s time already, right?” You slowly stand up, yawning softly. You didn’t really get too much sleep last night, and you sure as hell needed it. “Time to be free, little guy! Here, come.”

You carefully pick him up, close to your chest. You knew him too well to think he would hurt you, and the warmth was greatly appreciated by Mammon, who snuggled a bit within your embrace, trying to save this moment forever deep in his memories.

Being the avatar of greed, he’s used to the feeling of wanting, and, at times, not being able to. Yet, somehow, it didn’t stop this ugly feeling from blossoming in his now feathery chest. He felt so pathetic like this, so worked up because of a human being.

He and his brothers knew very damn well this wouldn’t lead anywhere nice. What could he do? Even if he managed to stay here, he knows his family can’t take another Lilith, and every second he spends here it’s harder not to fall even deeper for this trap his father seemed to have laid just for him.

Mammon convinced himself it was for the better, and soon did you. When you set him free to fly in the park next to your house, he didn’t even bother to look back as you screamed your goodbyes, the poor people around the park staring at you with a raised eyebrow as you soon deinflated with a big sight, knowing your routine was back to haunt you forever.

And of course, it did. You were back to doing your thing, spending your afternoons either with Liam and his new boyfriend or watching bad movies all by yourself, barely feeling certain melancholy as you found some stray feather hidden in your couch.

Liquorice was gone. Little did you know Mammon was not.

The young boy had found Lucifer as soon as he had left the park, and their little chat had been… Interesting. But at least it didn’t lead to his death, but rather to some extra chores and, finally, the hex coming undone, which meant he could always try to come back, even if he could no longer take certain adventage of your inocence.

Of course he went back to the House and Lamentation, and was made to attend every RAD lesson, but as soon as he was out of sight he was already walking over to your house, “accidentally” bumping you in the street from time to time, always trying his best to hide his identity, knowing you would probably be weirded out by always seeing the same guy around, and how easily his fluffy white hair and glasses could be told from any crowds.

You didn’t really think much of the many faceless guys you happened to encounter, of course. But what really made you ask yourself certain questions was the amount of little things showing up on your window frame, from stray coins to little glittery plastic jewelry. You didn’t want to think too much of it, but thinking it was Liquorice warmed your heart a little, and it was much less disturbing that thinking some random guy was passing daily around your home.

Mammon couldn’t help but swoon over the way you smiled, pressing his little gifts to your chest and looking through the window, the poor demon barely managing to stay invisible and attached to a tree he didn’t trust that much (C’mon, human, what made ya think livin’ on a fith floor was a good idea?), too scared to face you, too scared to leave.

Who would’ve told him it would be you, even if dragged by his dearest (and very aware) brother who would eventually face him, a feather necklace on your neck, smiling unkowingly and turning his little world upside down?

#Obey me #obey me mammon #om!#obey me swd #Obey me fanfic #om! swd #mammon x mc #mammon x reader #mammon x you

113 notes · View notes

unicorn-galactica · 5 years ago

Text

I just. I need to say.

I’m definitely not sorry to anyone who pays attention to my posts about my Pretty Little Liars spam recently.

I got the STRONGEST urge to binge the show the other day (and I just finished season 1 after like a week because life kept getting in the way despite quarantine)

And I’ve seen it before, yeah, but everything is still really confusing to me TO BE COMPLETELY HONEST.

BUT

I NEED to talk about the ships.

So please bear with me if you read this because I’m gonna lose it if I don’t talk about this somewhere LMAO

Pls don’t hurt me.

Keep in mind that I’m going off what I remember from watching it Three (3) years ago and the first season that I’ve rewatched.

Emilaya- !!FUCK¡¡ THEM FOR KILLING MAYA. I LOVED THIS GOTDAMN SHIP WITH MY WHOLE HEART AND I WAS ABSOLUTELY WRECKED WHEN THEY KILLED OFF MAYA. THE SONG STILL MAKES ME SOB EVERYTIME I HEAR IT. LIKE I KNOW IT WAS ALSO PLAYED WHEN “THEY FOUND ALISONS BODY” BUT SHAY’S ACTING AND THE WHOLE PLOT OF THE SCENE JUST RIPPED MY LITTLE GAY HEART OUT OF MY BODY.

Spemily- absolutely LOVE. Cannot get enough of it. and I don’t know why but I really thought I was the only one that shipped Spencer and Emily. But I’m so glad to have discovered that I am, in fact, NOT (which in hindsight I really should’ve seen). But this comes with my own internal conflict about how I think spoby is cute. And how much I loved Emilaya. Like. This might be my favorite ship overall. But it’s most definitely my favorite non cannon ship and by far my favorite friendship on the show.

Haleb- ABSOLUTELY ADORE. I have loved this ship from when it first set sail and I will stand by it even through some of the bullshit that happened (if I’m remembering some things correctly)

Spoby- LOVE IT. I really do. Spencer and Toby are so cute together but some of the stuff did piss me off, obviously. But like. I dunno I just think they’re nice.

Emison- I don’t really know how I feel about this to be honest. Like. I’m v happy that Emily is happy and the babies are cute. And it’s so nice that Emily’s first love came back to her and actually did feel the same is wonderful. But also. Kinda like. Fuck Alison for being such a bitch about Emily being in love with her and playing with her feelings? I love Emily with my entire soul and She must be protected at all costs.

Paily- again one that I don’t really know how to feel about. Like I kinda hate Paige but I also have a strange love for her? How she was so protective of Emily and they were kinda cute together. But I really can’t get over the thing where she was drowning Emily about the anchor spot. I know a lot more happens later with them but idk. I definitely remember being sad about Paige leaving when she did the first time I watched it. But idk I think the SimGM PLL Spoof made her too much of a joke for me lmao (I love you Emily! *runs away*)

Ezria- honestly? Not a fan. Like I’m a big sucker for the Teacher x Student trope (very very sadly and I hate myself for it) but I just. Am not a fan. Like I will admit; mad respect for this ship that was introduced in the first episode being there in the very end. But The whole thing about Ezra stalking them or whatever for that book? No ma’am. Nope 👎🏻

Mona & Mike (idk if they have a ship name)- I don’t really understand this one??? Like at all????

Noel & aria- absolutely not.

Melissa and anyone- I don’t remember what happened to Melissa at all but I definitely don’t like her and Ian because fuck him. And not wren for sure. And I don’t remember anybody else. And I also don’t remember her story line like at all but ??? The last I saw of her she was in the hospital after the wreck with Spencer in the season 1 finale and I just ??? Want her to have someone genuinely nice and that cares for her at this moment in time?

Ella & Byron- oh my god. I do not remember really what becomes of them? I think they get back together again?? But I love Ella! Not a big fan of Byron because he cheated on her, obviously, but also because it’s Chad Lowe and he’s very creepy imo

If I think of anymore I’ll probably add them on a reblog but yeah so there’s that. Lmao

pls don’t hurt me for these ;-; I just needed to put this somewhere.

#pretty little liars #pll #rewatch #ships #emilaya #spemily #haleb #spoby #emison #paily #ezria #emily fields #maya saint-germain #spencer hastings #hannah marin #caleb rivers #toby cavanaugh #alison dilaurentis #paige mccullers

56 notes · View notes

a-singleboat · 5 years ago

Text

Prank’d Proposal

Word Count: 1,149

8:30 AM

“Hey guys!” you spoke into the camera, smiling wide. Everyone had arced up behind you, starting with Damien on your left and ending with Courtney on your right. “So you may have noticed that we aren’t in our regular recording spaces and that is because today, we’re at Disney!”

You paused so you all could cheer together, allowing everyone to show their excitement as a group. The whole group started to splinter off into their quote-unquote designated groups. “Keith and Noah aren’t with us today, sadly, as they both are off visiting their respective families. We do, however, have me and Damien, Courtney, Olivia and Sarah, and Shayne and Ian. Every time you said a group, you panned over to where they stood where they waved to the camera.

Courtney walked up close to the camera and spoke softly to the lens. “We’re gonna have a fun time and we’re gonna share it with all of you guys!”

You laughed as Courtney retreated back into her group before setting the camera to watch what’s in front of you.

After taking a few shots of the park and ending up in front of the castle, you stopped the group. “Hey,” you panned the camera over to Shayne. “Do you remember when Keith and Courtney got engaged here and you said it was a bad idea?”

Shayne gave you a look that read something along the lines of, ‘Don’t you dare do what I think you’re going to do.’

“We should do that again!”

The girls up front chimed in, voicing their opinions that it was a good idea while Ian and Shayne shared odd looks with Damien.

Damien cleared his throat and perked up as if an idea had come to him. “That’s a great idea! Who’s going to propose to whom?”

Olivia held up her arm, pointing it to the sky. “I know!” She lowered her hand and pointed it towards you and Damien. “You and Damien should, for sure!”

You laughed at the thought, nodding along. “Okay, we gotta go get a ring though.”

12:30 PM

“So it’s been a few hours and the park has really started to fill up.” Damien swung the camera around to face himself. “I’m with Shayne and Ian right now and we actually have a secret to share with you guys.”

Shayne moved into frame, holding up a red velvet box and popped it open for the camera to see. “I’ve been lugging this ring around for about a month for Damien and he was actually going to propose today. The girls are off getting their own lunch and we went off to the castle.”

Ian took the camera from Damien so that it would look at him. “Honestly, I had no idea any of this was going to happen today.”

“Yeah,” Damien said off-screen. “Ian’s the only clueless one in this situation.”

“Anyways,” Shayne pulled the camera away from Ian and refocused on himself. “The girls went off to get a fake ring to give to Damien so he can propose later but that’s not gonna be the ring she’ll get. This time, it won’t be a bad idea.”

“This time it’ll also be for real,” Damien smiled. “And babe, if you’re watching this later, which will probably be during notes now that I think about it. But if you say no, I will cry. Fair warning has been given.”

“Let’s go do this!”

2:00 PM

“We’re here in front of the castle again, waiting for Damien, Shayne, and Ian to get back from their lunch.” You had the camera focused on yours and Courtney’s faces. Olivia and Sarah were in the background, talking to each other. “We bought the ring and it’s kinda cute, I’m not gonna lie.”

You showed the twenty dollar ring off to the camera, allowing the sun to catch off the gem on it. “It’s a really cheap material for a really expensive brand.”

Olivia and Sarah walked over, both excited for what’s to come. “They’re coming!”

You passed the ring over to Sarah and she walked over to Damien, passing the ring over.

When the boys reached you, Shayne took the camera and Damien slung an arm around your shoulders. He pressed a kiss into your hair and started your walk to the center of the compass in front of the castle. We stopped there and he took both my hands.

“I know this is a prank proposal but I do want you to know that I really love you. The past five years together have been the best five years I’ve had in my life. You’ve been there with me through thick and thin, from whenever I struggled with my own body image to when I’ve struggled with my own mental state, you’re always patient and I love you for that.” He looked down before looking back up into your eyes that had already started to water.

“I love you and I want to be able to spend the rest of my life with you. To have children and grow old together.” He got down on one knee just as the tears threatened to blur your vision. He pulled out a red velvet box and held it out in front of him.

“Now, I know this isn’t the ring that Sarah gave me, but I hope you’ll still accept it.”

By now, a crowd had formed around you two. So many people were sharing this moment with you and you were crying.

He flicked open the box to reveal a gorgeous ring that reflected in the sunlight. “Will you make me the happiest man alive and marry me?”

You sobbed out a yes and pulled him up into a kiss. Everyone around you two cheered as you pulled away, still sobbing. He slid the ring onto your finger and pulled you in for a hug. He pulled you back over to your friends and the girls converged on you while the boys congratulated Damien.

“I can’t believe that just happened,” Courtney all but shouted. “Damien, you sly dog!”

He shrugged and brought the boys closer to become one full group.

“Who knew?” You questioned them, giving Shayne the stink eye.

“Okay, yeah I knew. I’ve been holding onto your ring for a month and he was going to do it today anyway.” Shayne laughed and pulled you in for a hug. “I get to be the maid of honor, right?”

“Oh yeah, definitely,” you agreed, breaking from his hold and slotting yourself under Damien’s arm. “Is the camera still rolling?”

“Yeah.” Ian held the camera up to your face.

“Thank you guys for watching and if you want to see another proposal sometime soon, make sure to spam the comments asking for Olivia and Sam to get married soon! Make sure to like and subscribe to see more content! Bye!”

446 notes · View notes

teatitty · 5 years ago

Text

Rogues Lore

First of all I want to thank @schweeeppess for letting me spam her with Rogues lore 2 months ago cuz it made this post so much easier to type out when I can just copy-paste everything and then edit it to be more cohesive lmao

Second this is under a read more because it is A Lot

Leonard Snart AKA Captain Cold

He grew up with a super abusive father and his only refuge was when he would hang out with his grandfather in his grandfather's ice truck. When the grandfather died, he grew tired of his dad's abuse and set out to start a criminal career and moved to central.

(He's the one who started the rogues!)

He found blueprints for a "cold gun" which he ended up making from scratch (it’s also canon that he knows the gun so well he can remake it out of scraps in about 30 seconds to a minute) and had three main rules in his group: No Killing, No Harm To Women Or Children and No Drug Use. His cold gun is capable of interfering with the speedforce cuz it can reach “absolute zero” which is even colder then Mr Freeze's tech.

He's also the only cold-based villain capable of mastering this temp. In New Earth he was described as an "adversary" but in Prime Earth (same backstory as before mind you) he's described as being a straight villain whose only rule in the group is "no killing" (which seems to be a pretty flexible rule these days cuz DC has made him more, well, down with killing). He's also much younger here then he was in NE.

In Flash 2016 #17 we see another upgraded version of his gun that's capable of separating the Flash from the speedforce directly and, in doing so, causing Barry excrutiating pain. Generally, he and Barry had more respect for eachother in NE, to the point that Len even considered him family. In PE, though they have teamed up now and again, Len is far more hostile towards Barry, sometimes even being written in a way that suggests he wouldn’t mind if Barry died.

Sam scudder AKA Mirror Master (the first one!)

He was a simple convict who just really wanted to learn how to get inside a mirror's reflection. He practiced in a hall of mirrors and, once he succeeded, became Mirror Master. He was a frequent foe for Barry and, during Crisis on Infinite Earths, died around the same time Barry did.

He was the one who discovered the "mirror world". At one point he got himself trapped there and hated that the mirror world could just get him whatever he wanted instead of him stealing it so he got Barry to bust him out. He could also use mirror's to mind control ppl (dont ask) and this intrigued Barry.

On PE he's dating Lisa Snart (Len's younger sister) and is the only Mirror Master to exist. In N52 he, Len, Lisa, Mick and Marco all got fused with their weapons for a while and given meta-human abilities which I. hate because it took away what made them all so cool (I'm fine with Marco tho and you'll find out why in a minute) he's also a really big attention seeker lol

Hartley Rathaway AKA Pied Piper

Alright most of Hartley's info is from NE so: he was born deaf to wealthy parents who got him very high-tech hearing implants. He became obssessed with sounds and started experimenting with sonic technology. Bored of his rich life (and sometimes it's implied he had ableist and/or homophobic parents too) he took to a life of crime after learning how to hypnotize people through music (Pied Piper ayyy).

He was the first person to ever successfully break out of Iron Heights and did so because he befriended the rats there and used them to help himself escape, adding more to his whole Pied Piper thing. After Barry died he gave up crime and started working to help the poor and underprivelaged (I'm not saying he quit specifically bc of Barry's death buuuuuut most of the Rogues did so).

He struck up a close friendship with Wally and came out as openly gay! On PE all that we know for certain is that he's a "reformed vigilante" who's the conductor for the Central City orchestra. He used to share an apartment with Barry (yes for real) before he moved in with his bf, David Singh (also Barry's director in the CCPD). Lisa was the one who convinced him to come out to the Rogues, and they were all chill with being gay, their problem came when he started dating David who is, you know, a cop.

He has a pet rat called Moon (cute, right?). Also in pre-N52 canon (cant remember if it was NE specifically or older) Hartley once had a nervous breakdown after Barry arrested him so Barry took him to get help at a mental health hospital :')

(Some artists draw him blonde, some brunette and others go more for reddish-brown it’s kinda confusing)

Marco/Mark Mardon AKA Weather Wizard

On NE he's a two bit criminal called Mark Mardon (he's also white and yes thats important to note) but one day, after escaping from a cop van, he ran to find his brother, Clyde, who was a scientist only to discover his bro had died of a heart attack (however, there's implications that he actually murdered his brother and simply blocked out the memory).

He then found Clyde's notes on how to create a wand to control the weather and made it for himself. The worst he ever did on NE was imprison a town in winter and after Barry's death he went into semi-retirement (told you the Rogues all did this)

On PE however! He and Clyde are Latino and are the heirs to a huge cartel! Clyde takes over the cartel and Marco wants nothing to do with that life. After their father dies, Marco runs away and eventually becomes Weather Wizard.

He comes back when he hears his brother has been murdered and gets accused of the crime. He finds out it was Clyde's wife, Elsa, who orchestrated the whole thing and, in a fit of grief and anger, kills her with lightning. He also tries to kill himself at the same time but it doesn’t work. After her death, he curls up into a ball and starts crying because he feels like he hasnt got any family left but then Lisa shows up and is like "yo the rogues are still here for you bitch"

His emotions affect the weather in this continuity and I’m a weak bitch for that but that’s 100% my bias for Ororo Munroe showing itself lol

James Jesse AKA Trickster (the first one!)

James Jesse was born to the Flying Jesses, famous circus performers. He, however, was afraid of heights, and preferred reading stories of Western criminal Jesse James.

He invented air-walking shoes to get rid of his acrophobia, and this led to his fame as an aerialist at the circus. Buuut he wanted more excitement in life and became a conman instead! He had a lot of wacky gadgets like exploding teddy bears and, after Barry's death, moved from Central to Hollywood and started working in special effects.

Like Hartley, he even attended Barry's funeral. He once beat the devil, Neron, at his own game and eventually started using his skills for good, collecting weapons of incarcerated villains so they couldnt fall into the wrong hands. He eventually died protecting Hartley during Final Crisis. Deadshot was the one who got him.

On Prime Earth his parents were straight up neglectful and, instead of creating his own boots, he stole them from STAR labs instead. This version of him is also WAY more fucked up and murdery then NE to the point us long-term Rogues fans got really upset at how much DC had changed him

On NE his real name is “Giovanni Giuseppe” (swear this is, like, the only italian name DC knows) and on PE the Flying Jesse's were a deliberate rip off of the Flying Graysons

George “Digger” Harkness AKA Captain Boomerang

The illegitimate son of an American toy-maker, W.W. Wiggins, and an Australian woman, Betty Harkness, George Harkness was raised in poverty in the small town of Kurrumburra, Australia. His stepfather, Ian Harkness, hated the boy and made his life miserable. (Like canonically Ian was an abusive alcoholic and even abused Betty who was too ill to defend herself or George. The reason George goes by "Digger" is cuz that's what his mom used to call him before she died; it's aussie slang for "soldier")

In school, Harkness crafted a boomerang. He discovered he had great skill with the aboriginal weapon and often used it for mischief with his best friend, Mick Wentworth. He further honed his skills while spending some time hiding from the law in the Australian bush.

When Digger was eighteen, he and Wentworth robbed a general store and were able to make their escape with the aid of Digger’s boomerang. However, this incident caused Digger’s stepfather to kick him out of the house.

His mother gave him a plane ticket to Central City and told him to get in touch with Wiggins. Wiggins had been searching for a spokesman for W.W. Wiggins Game Company's latest product, a toy boomerang. Under the alias "George Green", Digger auditioned for and got the job. Wiggins outfitted him with a costume and gave him the name "Captain Boomerang."

Ridiculed by the audience, he took to a life of crime instead.

His story is pretty much the same on PE. The only diff being there was no childhood friend and Digger made boomerangs in an attempt to impress his absentee father. Also he has a habit of making up fake stories about himself lmao

The only one's he really doesnt stab in the back are the Rogues and Harley Quinn but everyone else? fair game. In Flash: Rebirth he and Barry even exchange favours for info and it’s implied this is a regular thing for them

Roscoe Dillon AKA The Top

He technically appears on PE but he's one of Thawne's acolytes so lets just. Skip that and focus on NE instead

Literally his whole thing is that he was obssessed with spinning tops as a kid and taught himself how to spin fast enough to deflect bullets. He became a criminal, tried to blackmail the entire world once, and was Lisa's first boyfriend!

He was also her ice-skating coach and taught her how to spin super well like himself! He has a very confusing characterization tho cuz sometimes he was written to be all about revenge and killing but other times he was just like the other rogues; a blue-collar criminal who stole things because he liked to.

He died eventually which I'm not going to try to explain cuz it's...yeah. There's also this whole thing where he could possess people after his death but this was in the silver age and that shit just happened sometimes so whatever

In short: Roscoe has a really cool concept to him but nobody really knew how to write him so he ended up all over the place

He also has a Spinning Top shaped satellite in space where he stores all his loot (dont ask)

Mick Rory AKA Heatwave

Mick Rory has pyromania! Very severely! He was born on a farm outside of Central and, as a child, was very fascinated with fire. This turned into an obssession and he ended up burning his house down. So fascinated by the flames, however, he never ran to get help, watching his whole house burn down (and killing his parents inside) and he ended up living with his uncle after this.

On a schooltrip, his schoolmate stuck him in a meat locker as a prank where he gained Cryophobia (fear of the cold) so in retaliation Mick locked the boy in his house and set the thing on fire (again, pyromania). He ran away again and ended up becoming a fire-eater for a circus. That didn't last long either because, surprise!, he burned the place down.

Desperate to find a way to help his obssession, he happened to see the Rogues operating in Central and decided to take up villainy. At first he and Len got into a few altercations with eachother due to Mick's fear of the cold but eventually they settled their differences and Len officially brought him into the Rogues.

Mick kinda relies on them to keep his pyromania in check basically. There was a time where he was, briefly, reformed and gained a close friendship with Barry (even being roommates with him. By then he'd already known Barry's real identity for a few years) and used his pyro knowledge to become a fire-fighter consultant. At one point he even worked for the FBI

His backstory is practically the same on PE the only difference being that he never expressed regret for burning down his house, and actually says he wishes he’d burned down the whole neighbourhood instead

Lisa Snart AKA Golden Glider

When I say her NE version is leagues above PE I mean it.

Like Len, she suffered abuse under their father and escaped it by becoming a figure skater under the name Lisa Star for the Futura Ice Show! Her fame came from her very fast spins, a trick she was taught by Roscoe. When Roscoe died while fighting Barry (brain complications though there’s more to it, but again I’m not going to get into that) Lisa turned to villainy, blaming Barry for her lover's death.

Her attempts on Barry and Iris' lives were always foiled. She used a pair of ice skates that created their own ice flow, and had many gadgets that caused hypnotism. She also stole Len's gun once but retooled it into a twirling Baton.

When Barry died she renounced her feud with him and attempted to go straight again with her brother. They created a company that recovered lost or stolen items. Eventually she returned back to a life of crime, went through three boyfriends, all using the name Chillblaine (she named them that iirc), until the fourth Blaine killed her. Len got revenge on that one

On PE, however, Lisa had a brain tumor (it got cured later) and was a tag-a-long villain for her brother and her boyfriend, Sam Scudder. This version of her never became a skater and is instead murderous just for...the sake of it. She also has this thing about wanting to be the leader of the Rogues instead of Len, and when she's in charge of them for a while the Rogues’ morals change and killing is suddenly fine so. Whatever. NE Lisa is the best (also her whole outfit? Stunning)

Roy G. Bivolo AKA Rainbow Raider (not technically a Rogue anymore but he was a member for a while)

He appeard on PE as Chroma but gets murdered by Grodd so we only have NE canon to use (they did my mans dirty)

He was a wonderful painter from an early age but was born colourblind. His father, an optometrist, was determined to create a device that would let him see in full colour. Toy didnt get the device until after his father's death but unfortunately the device didnt let him see colour.

Instead, the goggles could project beams of light that could become solid objects, make him invisible, blind his opponents, or affect the emotions of his targets. Angry that he couldnt pursue an artistic career. he decided to become a thief and primarily stole famous artwork. He was eventually killed by Amunet Black

Evan McCulloch AKA Mirror Master (second one)

Evan was born to rich parents Louis and Carol Erikson who gave him up for adoption because they were too young to be responsible parents. He ended up at the McCulloch orphanage.

At age 8 he was molested by one of the older boys there and, in self-defence, ended up drowning the him. At 16 he left the orphanage, taking on the name of the woman who raised him and moves to Glasgow (he’s scottish btw)

He found that it was super difficult to hold down a job but, needing to make ends meet and constantly breaking the law anyway, he turned to a life of crime and became a hitman and then a professional assassin.

One day he got hired to kill his birth father but was unaware of who his target was until after he took the shot. Grief-stricken, he attended the funeral and tried to work up the nerve to approach his birth mother. By the time he had, she'd committed suicide and he turned himself in for his crimes.

Either the Scottish or US government gave him Sam's old Mirror Master gear and hired him to be a mercenary.

His first job was scaring Animal Man into stopping his activism, but he failed because of Animal Man’s wife. Refusing to actually kill the wife and children (thanks to his own morals) he gets fired and helps Animal Man seek revenge.

He continues to work as a criminal and supervillain-for-hire, even working out of costume as a mercernary in Britain.

Eventually he found his way to Central City and joined the Rogues, taking over as Sam Scudders official successor. There was a time where he had a Cocaine Addiction which caused friction between him and Capt Cold because of Len’s rule against drug use.

Throughout all of this, Evan made sure to donate a portion of all the money he ever got to the McCulloch Orphanage

Axel Walker AKA Trickster (second one)

On PE, Axel was recruited by the Rogues early on in his career. He messed up during a heist and they kicked him out (they'd never do that but w/e)

He worked for Mob Rule as a henchman for a bit then went freelance when MB was arrested. He saved Cold's life cuz he felt he still owed Cold a debt. When Grodd took over Central, Axel tried to join his side but Grodd tore his arm off from the bicep (ouch) and left him to die on the street. Axel got himself a cool sleek robot arm and returned to crime anyway. He got accused of murder, Barry cleared his name, but he still got sent to Iron Heights for other charges.

The Rogues, hearing about this, went to bust him out and were like "okay fine u can hang with us" and he stayed with them from then on

In NE canon, while Jesse was working with the FBI, Axel stole all his gear and ended up working for Penguin in Gotham. Penguin gets attacked by Tarantula, Axel fails to stop her and a few days later he gets caught by Robin (Tim) for causing trouble in Gotham.

He moves on to work with Amunet Black, but after her defeat is offered to join the “new Rogues” by Capt Cold and accepts the offer. Some stuff happens, he fights the OG Trickster who leaves him in a dumpster and tells him never to pick up the gear again, then Axel answers an ad from some college students asking for a trained hero to teach them some things, he has dinner with them and then kills them all. Neat.

When Jesse died, Axel redonned the Trickster gear and started operating his own crew out of an old Rogues hideout. When the Rogues returned to Central, Axel found out they were gonna retire and go underground. He rejoined them to help them get revenge on Inertia for manipulating them into killing Bart Allen, and he stayed with the group henceforth.

Evan explained to him that joining the Rogues wasn’t a matter of him wanting to be one, but why he needed to be one

In short: Axel is a punk kid who wants to fit in with the big boys and the Rogues are the only ones who really gave him a chance, acting like his older siblings. It’s worth noting that canon never mentions any relatives for him so, as far as we know, crime is all he’s ever known

And that’s all of them!

#random facts #the rogues #this took. so long to do #good luck reading it all lmao!#god i'm tired #i love them a whole lot can you tell?#tw: abuse mention #tw: drug addiction mention #tw: assault mention

59 notes · View notes

pixeldreqms · 4 years ago

Photo

september 2018

there's an estimated forty days left of filming and already, ian's dreading the end. he's been trying harder to enjoy the little moments, and not just be miserable because he knows they won't last forever. it's hard, but he's trying. he's almost never as happy as he is when he's with these people, his fellow losers, and he doesn't want to waste the time he has left with them.

forty days.

probably closer to thirty nine now since it's past midnight. one more day down. but that's something he's not letting himself linger on. instead, his eyes settle on kennedy who is getting his ass kicked in a video game but is still laughing so loud that the sound is filling the entire basement of the rented house. he focuses on that sound and can't help but smile. he focuses on it and he swears every sad thought in his head floats away, just like that.

he accepted earlier in the summer that his feelings for kenny weren't as platonic as he had originally thought. but in his defense, he was only twelve when they first met. he had a lot of figuring out to do.

he's figured it out now.

he loves all his friends, strongly and deeply, and he's a little co-dependent with more than a couple of them. if he goes a day without talking to evan, he genuinely misses him. he goes out of his way to visit the burgess' at every given chance. each member of the cast has expressed annoyance with the way he spams the group chat while they're all asleep. he's entirely convinced he needs june to survive. and he feels all that with kenny, too, so it took him some time to realize just how much more he felt. and how he felt things for him that went well beyond the things he felt for everyone else he loved.

he doesn't get an overwhelming urge to lean in and kiss any of his other friends when they get too close, for starters. that was a big tip off for ian.

kenny jokingly winked at him once and he felt like someone had lit him on fire.

he constantly found himself shoving others aside just to stand by him in group photos or to sit by him on a couch during a movie.

his own behavior should have been a giveaway right away, but he's not exactly very experienced in that area. not in just dating, but even with liking people. he's only really had one real crush before, and he'd been twelve. and he'd never liked one of his guy friends before either - but he'd accepted that fact easily. given how many male tv characters he'd been infatuated with over the years, and his long-standing secret harry styles obsession that started back when he was ten years old, he'd always suspected he wasn't totally straight. he still hasn't slapped a label on himself yet, but he doesn't think he needs to know for sure what he is to know that he definitely has feelings for kenny.

feelings that are so intense that sometimes he can't even think about anything else. feelings that are so all-consuming that all he wants to talk about 24/7 is kenny and he has to force himself, multiple times a day, to shut up about him or else he'll give himself away or let too much slip. and he knows better than to say anything, to kenny, or to anyone.

but god he wants to.

he's kept this feeling bottled up for months now, though it feels like so much longer, and sometimes he feel like he's gonna burst from how bad he wants to talk about it. his journal only has so many pages he can wax poetic about kenny onto, and he's sure even the inanimate object is sick of hearing about his crush. he needs a pair of real ears. and maybe someone to tell him he's not stupid or crazy for falling for his best friend. because boy oh boy does he feel like he is sometimes.

evan's loud hooping and hollering covers up the sound of kenny's laughter, and ian rolls his eyes but can't help but grin in amusement. his victory had been predicted since mid-game, but evan was still celebrating like he'd done something impressive.

in an attempt to show kenny support, ian raises his arm and gives evan and his win a thumbs down. "booooooo."

he gets two middle fingers raised at him for his efforts. he thinks that's all he's getting in return for voicing his disapproval, until evan drops the controller and comes flying past the gaming area, past the couch, and leaping onto ian where he's sprawled across a huge bean bag chair.

"hey, i wanted to play the winner!" jeremy shouts from the couch in front of the tv, where the other four teenagers had been sat, partially watching the game, partially on their phones, mostly having their own conversations.

ian easily could have squeezed in with them, but he couldn't resist a good bean bag. plus, he was closer to the little mini bar area that this place had. the bar itself wasn't stocked with alcohol, not that ian cares or jeremy's mom would have let them drink anyway, but she kept the shelves and mini fridge stocked. ian likes being close to the snacks.

"well i'm over here now!" evan yells back. the loud volume right in ian's ear makes him wince. "play the loser. kenny, that's you. you're the loser."

ian shoves evan off of him and onto the floor. "dick."

"no," evan says, rejecting his removal from the chair. "move your ass."

"no." but he does it anyway. he can't move much or else he'd be on the floor, because yes it's a big seat, but they're both months away from being sixteen and are not the same small twelve year olds they'd been when they first met. they've hit massive growth spurts since then. sharing small spaces isn't as easy as it once was, but it doesn't stop them from trying. evan ends up with one of his legs completely over ian's and their shoulders pressed together. ian lets it happen, but he's still mildly annoyed about it. "wow, this is so comfortable. i'm so glad you came all the way over here to dig your elbow into my stomach. feels great."

"are you saying you don't want to sit with me, you a**hole?" evan asks.

evan's elbow digs deeper into his side and ian's pretty sure it's on purpose. he grimaces and shifts as much as he can but still doesn't move out of the seat.

"that's literally exactly what i'm saying, yeah. you stink."

the bickering continues, because it never really ends with them. there's an almost constant flow of jokes and jabs between them. but for as much as they give each other sh*t, him and evan have definitely had their fair share of genuine moments between them. anytime ian has an anxiety attack in a group setting, evan's one of a few who knows how to calm him. ian's called him crying about his family or about wanting to go home more than once. there was also the time on set during their first movie together where after an intense, emotional scene, they'd both cried and hugged each other until they got it out of their system. sometimes his relationship with evan reminds him of his relationship with his sister, and the way they can pick and pick at each other, but at the end of the day, they'd die for one another.

it's just really fun to insult each other, so they do it often.

eventually, after evan shouts at ian to eat an ass, they're informed they're being too loud.

anna, the only girl in a group of boys, shushes them with so much aggression that it terrifies ian a little. she puts up with so much nonsense every time she hangs out with them, he's just waiting for the day she finally snaps. he knows he doesn't want it to be his fault, so he does as he's told and shushes.

"they're all haters," evan mutters.

ian nods. "they wanna be us so bad."

and just like that, they're on the same team again.

ian feels a vibration against his leg and realizes his phone's fallen under his thigh. as he digs it out, he sees evan's own attention has momentarily returned to the game on the tv just as the loading screen transitions back into gameplay, so he feels less bad about checking it. reading kenny's name on his screen, he visibly lights up, grinning at the text.

'if he's being a dick, come escape and play me next,' kenny has written.

ian quickly types back. 'he's not, but i might anyway. wanna be next to kick your ass.'

he glances across the room, but he can't see kenny at all where he's sitting on the floor in front of the couch, so he has no idea if he's grinning as big as ian is just from seeing a new text from him. he can't imagine he is, but it's still a nice thought. as soon as the round on the tv ends and the loading screen is back up, kenny starts typing.

'I THINK I'M WINNING THIS TIME.'

ian's smile widens, his cheeks sore from it, but he doesn't get a chance to start replying before -

"is it a meme?" evan asks, neck craning to look. ian clicks back to his homescreen quickly.

"is what a meme?"

evan slumps back a little once ian drops his phone to his lap. "whatever you were staring at like that."

"no, or - yeah." he answers, then changes his answer when he realizes he can't tell him what he was actually grinning at.

he wasn't as subtle as he had hoped.

"you lookin' at something nasty?" evan asks. "you fvcking freak?"

ian blinks, then deadpans, "yes. i'm looking at something nasty while surrounded by my friends. with you practically in my lap. you caught me."

"thought so. looking like a blushing school girl over here." that one's a little too close to home considering he feels like a smitten school girl every time he sees or talks to kenny, so ian shoves evan for it. he almost rolls over the edge of the seat but gets a palm on the ground to steady himself. "come on. seriously. what was it? what's so secret?"

"fvck, you're nosy."

"invested in your life," evan corrects him.

"nosy," ian insists.

evan gives him a look, a raised brow and a silent dude, come on, tell me, and ian takes a breath.

he reminds himself there's a reason he's kept this secret so under wraps. as much as he wants to scream from the rooftop how much he likes kenny, the risk of him finding out isn't worth it. he'd ruin not only their friendship, but probably the entire group. they'd never be able to all be together. not with kenny inevitably being weirded out by ian's crush, and ian being too mortified to be around him anymore. the rest of filming would be a nightmare. getting through press and the promotion would be torture. he'd lose his favorite person.

nothing good could possibly come from people knowing.

then, he reminds himself this is evan. they may thrive off of giving each other sh*t, but he can trust him. he's never let him down before. not when it mattered. if there's anyone he can tell and trust they won't screw him over by letting it slip, he feels like it's evan.

if for no other reason than he'd suffer, too. not just because ian would never forgive him, but he'd hate it if the group dynamic was thrown out of wack, too.

evan feels like a safe place to finally be honest.

so he exhales, and speaks.

"it was a - i was looking at something from - it's a someone."

a bit of a rocky start, but he got where he was trying to go after a few attempts.

"you have a someone?" evan asks, seeming mildly offended that this isn't information he was already privy to. "someone i don't know about?"

"i don't really have someone," ian tells him. "i just... want to. i want to be with them."

"who is she?"

"it's..." ian's voice is barely a whisper at this point. "it's not a girl..."

the silence that follows is the longest, most anxiety inducing silence ian has ever experienced. it can't be more than twenty seconds, probably not even that long, before evan speaks again but it feels like a lifetime. he doesn't know why he's so nervous about the reaction to this. he knows evan well enough to know he won't care, but people can be surprising in the worst ways sometimes. and he's never done this before. he's pretty sure his sister has an inkling, but he's never come out and admitted it to her. this is the first time he's having the actual conversation and god it's fvcking terrifying. he kind of wants to cry suddenly but he's really holding himself together.

even while fearing and preparing himself for the worst, he mostly expects evan to react with some generic but kind sentiment. a that's okay with me, dude or an i love and accept you, pal.

that's not what he gets.

after a moment, evan's brow furrows, his head tilts just slightly, and he asks, as sincere as can be, "man, is it me?"

it's just what ian needs to hear to ease his tension. he throws his head back and lets out a cackle. the ache in his stomach is no longer due to nerves, but from how hard he's laughing. "absolutely fvcking -" he has to stop, pausing as he got through another fit of laughter. "oh, absolutely fvcking not."

a tear rolls down his cheek and he flicks it away as he finally starts to calm down. then he gets a good look at how unamused evan looks and it sets him off again.

"okay, it's not me, i got it!" evan says in a hushed whisper, just loud enough to be heard over the sound of ian's own laughter. "who is it then?"

the nerves are back, suddenly. and again, he doesn't even know why. he wants this. he wants to be able to talk to someone about his feelings. he wants evan to know. but his palms are still sweating.

"you can't tell him," ian says softly. "i'll literally strangle you. you have to swear."

"i swear," he assures him. "so it's someone i know?"

he's pretty sure evan knows everyone ian knows. even his few remaining guy friends from back home, evan's met. but he doesn't remind him of that now, just nods and confirms. "yeah. it's someone you know."

"who? i'm not gonna tell, ian."

nervously, he glances towards the couch, just to make sure the game was still being played and their entire group of friends hadn't turned around to stare and listen to his confession. all he sees are the backs of heads, and he can hear everyone's laughter mixed with anna's muffled trash talk as she has a go at the game. no one's paying attention to him except for evan.

for some reason, he's having a hard time looking at him. the hardest part is already over, he tells himself, just spit his name out. but he's also telling himself that it's not too late and he can keep this secret to himself. evan would be annoyed about the cliffhanger, but ian could deal with that easier than he could deal with other possible outcomes of telling him.

no. he's doing this.

suck it the fvck up.

with his eyes on the back of the couch, in the smallest voice possible, he admits, "kenny."

he doesn't know what evan's initial reaction is, because it takes a few seconds for him to finally meet his eyes again, but when he does look at him again, his face isn't easy to read. he doesn't look shocked, exactly - and really, given that ian is arguably closest to kenny and evan out of everyone, it probably wasn't the most surprising name he could have said. if anything, he looks... confused?

"you're not gonna tell him, are you?" ian asks, misreading the look as inner turmoil about not wanting to keep a secret from their other best friend.

that's not at all what it is.

"no, i said i'm not," evan huffs. "but, why the fvck is it not me?"

"i'm - i'm sorry?" ian says, because what else does he say to that? "are you offended that i don't have a crush on you?"

"am i not cute?"

"evan, this isn't how people are supposed to react to sh*t like this -"

"i just can't believe out of everyone - kenny." he whispers it, at least. "and not me? really?"

"i'd love it if you weren't so fvcking weird about this."

"i'm not being weird! it being me just would have made sense, is all i'm saying."

ian squints. "and it being kenny doesn't make sense?"

evan sighs, falling back into the chair a little. "yeah, i guess it does. it does."

"just to make sure - " ian says, putting a hand up. "you don't - i mean, you're not upset because you like - "

"ew, don't even say it. i don't like you."

it's ian's turn to sigh and lean back into the seat. "okay, cool. you're just... fvcking weird. that's good to know."

there's a moment of silence and ian just breathes. he did it. he did it and nothing's changed, nothing world shattering happened. he feels like a weight's been lifted, just by telling one person. it feels really good. even if it didn't go how he'd have imagined it to. still good.

"knew it couldn't have been a meme you were looking at," evan says a minute later. "the memes you send are never that funny."

ian scoffs. "fvck you. i send the funniest memes."

"willow sends the funniest memes."

"you're gonna go to hell for saying sh*t like that. lying is a fcking sin."

"is it?"

ian pauses.

"... i'm not sure. i think so. did neither of us go to church growing up? that kind of explains a lot."

there's an angry cry from the front of the room that draws their attention. anna curses, followed by kenny laughing. once again, ian smiles at the sound.

the laughter, not the cursing.

"did kenny actually win?!" evan shouts over to the rest of the group.

kenny and anna stand up as the other three perk up on the couch to look over at the two in the bean bag.

"i've been winning!" kenny calls back.

jeremy chimes in. "he's on a winning streak!"

"more like a cheating streak," anna mumbles.

"he's beaten everyone except evan," jeremy says.

"ahem!" evan waves a hand, gesturing to ian. "not everyone except evan. let ian at him."

ian tries to suppress his grin. he'd been so worried about the bad outcomes of telling evan, but he hadn't considered all the good reasons. like evan helping him get closer to kenny. even just in little ways, like playing video games. maybe this was a better idea than he thought.

he meets kenny's eyes and when kenny smiles at him, he can't hide his own anymore.

"ian?" kenny asks. "you want the winner?"

evan nudges ian in the side, winking at him as they make eye contact and calling out to kenny, "yeah, he does."

on second thought, he might end up regretting it.

#◦ ` ･ writing : all the glamour and the trauma and the fucking melodrama #◦ ` ･ writing : hold me closer tiny bastard #◦ ` ･ writing #◦ ` ･ mine

1 note · View note

awesome-bamon · 6 years ago

Text

Also want to talk about the constant double standards in the TVD fandom....

When everyone wants to pile on Kat like she is the “problematic one” and at the same time swear how their white faves are “unproblematic”

Nina Stans like to accuse Kat of being “rude” and a “bully”. Just for clapping back at people in the TVD fandom who have bullied her. And blaming Kat for standing up for herself, while they ignore the hate that she has gotten for 8 seasons.

As I said the most vocal Stans in the fandom who love to jump in and criticize with a black celeb/actor/actresses speaks out against the hatred and harassment in the fandom. Are most of the time the ones who are completely silent on the racism that he aimed at black actors/actresses in fandoms.

Plus, Nina Stans are the ones to falsely accuse Kat of being rude to her fans, when Kat just didn’t want her true fans to be drowned at by spamming her tags with unrelated/unnecessary TVD content. Or tagging her with TVD photos of TVD actors/cast members that she isn’t in.

Meanwhile Nina ignores her fans most of the time. And there have been cases of Nina meeting her Stans in real life/face to face and being rude or off putting towards them.

Plus, Nina has friends who do blackface and was cheesing it up in pictures with Johnny Depp. After the stories of his abuse came out and during the Me Too and Times Up movements.

Kat making any type of comment towards or about TVD that isn’t singing it’s praises and thanking Julie Plec/the TVD fandom and the show for “putting food on her table”. Is seen as her being “ungrateful.”

Meanwhile Paul. For years has shaded TVD, slammed Julie Plec’s writing and has dragged TVD. But, is seen as the “jokester” of the TVD fandom. And most of the time many TVD Stans laughed it up and Keked whenever Paul would slam TVD and no one called him “ungrateful.”

Now Ian does get resentment for his Anti-Delena comments. But, that is mainly due to DE Stans being entitled to believing that everyone is suppose to support/love their ship.

Yet, if Ian was making comments against Bamon instead of DE, Then you can pretty much guarantee that his white privilege would be getting him a pass in the TVD fandom. And many DE Stans especially would have used that to hate on Kat and target her with hate more.

Kat got so much hate and heat yesterday for asking people not to tag her in things unrelated to her. Yet, meanwhile Paul who said how he recently admired Woody Allen, didn’t get near the same amount of attention/criticism that Kat got for making a simple, reasonable request.

Many in the TVD fandom in their rush to single out the black actress, were willing to exclaim how their white TVD fave was “superior” to Kat in not being problematic. That they either disregarded, ignore, or overlooked/didn’t know about their problematic faves actions.

How many Nina Stans were quick to forget/ignore about her taking pictures with an abuser or her having friends who do black face in their usual rush to hate on Kat.

How many TVD Stans overlooked Paul’s problematic comment on admiring Woody Allen?

Seeing people with Candice King or Joseph Morgan icons trying to shade Kat’s career. When Joseph’s show didn’t get picked up. And when Candice has yet to get a job outside of working for Plec.

TVD fandom always likes to shade Kat’s career. Because they were brainwashed by Plec and fooled themselves into believing that their faves were so much more talented and “more popular” than Kat was. All based on their experience of the most vocal TVD Stans.

Meanwhile it is a fact that Kat has gotten booked in the most high quality roles out of all of the cast.

White privilege in fandom is when you have Stans who look for the slightest/smallest reasons to jump on the black actress and call her “rude”, “ungrateful.” “A bully” and “Cancelled”.

While at the same time the white actors/actresses who do or say worse thing get a pass and still stanned for. Because as I pointed out you have a couple of cases of some cast members supporting the likes of Johnny Depp and Woody Allen.

#Kat Graham #Anti TVD fandom #Fandom double standards #Fandom racism #Many TVD Stans love to act like their white faves shit don't stink

66 notes · View notes

shinobicyrus · 7 years ago

Text

The Not-Date

A belated birthday gift for my good friend @homebeccer. I probably failed attempting three different fics until finally ended up doing one that’s pretty much a continuation of last year’s fic with her OC Phuong. Happy Birthday Becs!

Tucker waffled for three days trying to think of someplace for Phuong and him to have lunch.

The Nasty Burger always worked when he hung out with Danny and Sam- but Phuong was someone her barely knew. The idea of taking her to some trashy burger joint that had been demolished and rebuilt more times than there were Spider-Man reboots just felt...juvenile.

Not that any of his other options were any better. Restaurants were too formal, and a more casual cafe just screamed “lunch date.” Which is not what this was. At all.

He’d done his best to be as clear as could be on that. Anything resembling a date was so beyond Tucker’s ability to handle. The last thing he needed was to send mixed signals with the wrong lunch setting.

(Hell, the last thing anybody needed was prolonged exposure to the smoldering, irradiated wreck that was Tucker’s Foley love life.)

Which still left him with...absolutely no idea where they should go.

God, all this drama over Lunch. There was no word in English or Esperanto that could accurately express just how painfully pathetic Tucker was being, right now. Maybe the Germans had a word for it. This seemed like something they’d have covered.

Nah, screw that. Confidence was the name of the game. He’s totally got this. He fights ghosts on a semi-weekly basis, has gone through inter-dimension portals, hacked a robot-ghost assassin, and briefly ruled a whole kingdom as a power-crazed tyrannical ghost-pharaoh...

Actually...scratch that last one. No need to revisit that. Teenager stuff, everyone goes through that phase.

The point was, Tucker was a grown man with a tech job, an apartment, alimony payments, and goddamn time travel experience. He could handle a totally platonic lunch with a minimum of panic texts to Valerie. Sure, Ms. Hunts Her Prospective Love Interests may be in the eternal four-way-tie of scariest ladies he knows, but at least she’s safer than the alternative. There was desperate, and then there was desperate.

Sam would have broken his feeble protests on the not-date status of the lunch on the peak of a single raised eyebrow while balancing little James on her hip. Danielle would insist on being his wingman, Jazz would be a post-doc shark smelling ‘unresolved issues’ in the water, and Danny-

Danny would try to be supportive.

Valerie listened to his plight with the same patient silence she probably used for lying in wait with an ecto-rifle and suggested a practical, easy solution.

The answer was, of course, Meatheads. Which Tucker of all people should have figured out sooner- because Meatheads. You ordered at the register, but after you sat down and they brought the food to your table. Perfect middle ground.

Yeah, Tucker was counting this as a win. The bar was set ludicrously low.

He goes early because it was easier than sitting in his apartment refreshing traffic conditions on his phone trying to math-out arrival times and debate how early is early before it’s back into descriptive German adjectives levels of pathetic again. Ordered some fries to settle the nervous queasiness, which didn’t really help because cajun seasoning is delicious but the very opposite of calming.

He didn’t think anything much over Phuong being five minutes late. She was new in town, and even with GPS going to new places was a hassle.

By the time she was fifteen minutes late he was guzzling his second ill-advised mixed fountain drink abomination and jittering his leg, constantly looking from his phone to the door as though she could slip in between the ticks of seconds. Jeez, get a grip, Foley. So she was fashionably late. Watch, she was going step through that day any second and you’re gonna feel like such fixating tool Vlad will probably swoop in and sue you for copyright infringement.

Twenty minutes he- he doesn’t even know. She’d text if she was running late, right? Even if she’d come to her senses and the ‘OMG You Saved My Life From A Ghost’ gratitude finally wore off she’d still...like...tell him.

She didn’t come off as someone who would bail without warning. All that time in her apartment, Tucker thought he’d gotten a pretty good indication what kind of person she was. Witty but hiding it behind that poker face. Tough too- most people would be screeching and next to useless when that ecto-heap of a ghost crawled out of her sink. Tucker had plenty of experience with tough, kickass women, but hers was an...ordinary, down to earth strength. The kind you built for yourself by hand, brick by brick.

Sturdy. Decent. If she had something to say, she’d say it properly to Tucker’s face.

Half and hour late and no word. Checking his phone for the umpteenth time revealed it’d been a fully thirty-three seconds since he last checked. The couple a few tables behind him chatted quietly in a language that wasn’t English. Re-reading the last text conversation with her; they’d said 1:00, right? Yeah, and it was definitely today.

God, he was such a self-absorbed idiot. Phuong wouldn’t just blow him off- not without good reason. Plenty of perfectly normal reasons; in Amity, plenty of not-so-normal ones, too. Maybe he should call? Or send a text to see if she was okay? Then again, one text would probably lead another and then Phuong would quickly get an alarming amount of babbling text spam in her phone.

No, he should still send one. Just one. He typed up a quick, casual message that he immediately deleted, re-wrote to satisfy a criteria he couldn’t even be sure of, and by the time he had wasted yet another five minutes weighing tone (casual but maybe it’s too casual like he doesn’t care I mean the last one was waaaaay too desperate like wow stalker much?) and almost didn’t notice when Phuong barreled through the front door.

She was panting like a marathon runner. Clothes wrinkled, hair wild and windblown. Tuck stared dumbly at her, so she was the one who spotted him and immediately made a beeline for his table, practically collapsing into the opposite chair and still breathing hard.

“I’m...” she gasped out, wiping a sheen of sweat on her forehead. “Am so sorry. There was a- I don’t even know.” She gestured wildly, flailing and failing to charade it. “I was just. Walking. Here. On time. And there was this...this noise. And then this thing- person. I...I knew her, but. No, there was an...explosion first?”

Tucker spied the rest of the tables in his periphery. They were getting a few looks, but besides the sudden hushed indecipherable chatter from the two behind them, it would take more than a slightly disheveled woman to grab someone’s attention in Amity.

“That...would explain the uh...you know you have a bit of glass in your hair?” Tucker reached over and carefully plucked a glimmering little chunk of marble-sized glass and wrapped it carefully in his napkin.

She felt around her abused-looking hair. ”Crap! Is there any more?” She looked down at her the state of her shirt. “Shit, I look like a mess.”

Tucker slid his pop over to her. “Here, take a drink of this and just...breathe a little.”

She obediently took the cup, popped off the lid and guzzled straight from it rather than the straw. Tucker watched with almost morbid fascination while she keep chugging, throat working steadily, until she finally slammed it back down on the table like something much stiffer. An echo of leftover, half-melted ice settled hollowly. “I hate soda,” she said.

Blasphemy. Tucker had concocted - nay, perfected- that mixed drink formula himself, and the Illinoisan in him demanded she call it pop, dammit. Still, priories. “That’s fine. Let the hate flow through you. Feel better?”

She was surprised by the belch she replied with, looked sheepish, and nodded instead.

“So.” Tucker folded his hands on the tabletop. ”Explosion?”

Phuong’s brow furrowed, like she was trying to remember something but second-guessed herself. “I...I think Ember McLain tried to kill me.”

“Ah.”

The caffeine seemed to have righted her head. She narrowed her eyes at him, suspicious. “You don’t seem even a little surprised.”

“I mean, I’m a little more informed than most because of the Fentons- but yeah, we were kind of due for an Ember tantrum. She has this on-again/off-again thing with another ghost and when they go off-again, she tends to go off.”

“Like blowing up a hipster record store some people minding their own business might be walking past?”

“She’s pretty much the reason you won’t find a Hot Topic in city limits.” Seeing his opportunity, Tucker propped up his hands under his chin and grinned at her. “That doesn’t explain how you recognized her, though.”

“I...refuse to answer that questions on the grounds that it might incriminate me.”

“I didn’t know Ember’s albums were popular outside of Amity.”

“She was a world phenomenon- everybody knows her name!” Phuong burst out with what Tucker suspected was a lingering residue of musical thrall that had probably been implanted there since she was a teenager. Damn, talk about getting music stuck in your head.

“I’m only surprised you were into something so...mainstream.”

“So I’m not as picky with my music as I am with my movies. No one goes around singing lines from Hitchcock movies because they get stuck in your head.”

“Well, at least you survived an assassination attempt from your teenage-rebellion phase.”

“Only because some...some...super hero, I guess? He was literally wearing this black spandex.”

Years of training kept the grin off Tucker’s face. “Snow white hair? Glowing green eyes?”

“Yeah, that was the guy.”

“Congrats, you just got your first rescue from Danny Phantom. You’re practically an Amity...ite? Amityvill...ian? What would that be?”

Right there, Phuong looked like she had officially reached the tail end of her suspension of disbelief. “Danny...Phantom? You can’t be serious. What is he, some ghost superhero?”

“Pretty much. Keeps most of the meaner ghosts from getting too out of hand. Blowing up a shop was a little more extreme than usual- most the time it’s some floating boxes and a ‘Bewaaare’! Y’know. Wednesday stuff.”

By this point, Phuong’s fingers were carding through her already frazzled hair. “Of course there’s a ghost superhero. Why wouldn’t there be a ghost superhero. I find one nice apartment over the border with decent rent and now I’m getting blown up and there’s superheroes.” She looked up him, eyes screaming for sanity. “Please tell me he’s the only one. That’s there’s not like...a pack of super-friends or something I need to be on the lookout for.”

Their neighbors’ indecipherable conversation had picked up again- which Tucker found distracting. It was weird too- he couldn’t understand it, but he could almost swear he had heard it before. Japanese? Korean? Hindi? No...

Wait.

“Well, there’s...a couple,” he admitted, trying not to enjoy the bang as Phuong’s head met the table. “There’s the Red Huntress- she flies around on a rocket board in this red and black armor. Usually stays out of the limelight- not nearly as active in the media as Danny Phantom. Then there’s...well. I guess who could call her Phantom’s side-kick. Invisobelle.”

Two tables behind, a chair scraping and some muffled words. Tucker kept his face schooled.

“Invisobelle.” Phuong sighed. “That’s just awful.”

He shrugged. “Like I said, she’s just Phantom’s sidekick. Not nearly as popular or as active as him.”

Before Phuong could say anything else, her very discontented stomach gurgled a noisy protest.

“I,” she announced, “am so hungry I would murder the cow myself if it was faster, and I don’t care how many calories it is or what my mom would say about it because I have goddamn earned it.” She cocked her thumb back towards the line at the register. “I’m going to go up to order. Have you eaten yet?”

He tried not to sound guilty. “Just some fries?”

“Okay, tell me what you want and I’ll do it for the both of us. And I’m paying. Don’t think I haven’t forgotten.”

“I know better than to argue with you about it,” Tucker said.

“Good man.”

After she left with both of their orders, Tucker waited until she was well out of earshot before standing up and approaching the couple two tables behind theirs.

They both stiffened at his approach. One of them hunched behind an open copy of the Amity Park Angle that was three days old.

Dammit, he freaking knew he was hearing ghost-speak.

Danielle, as incognito as she could manage in aviators and a My Little Pony(TM) beanie gasped unconvincingly.

“Whoooaa, Tucker? You’re here too? No waaaayy! Only in small towns, huh?”

“Yeah, I’m completely buying this.” He pulled down the newspaper to uncover Wulf wearing a baseball cap over his flattened ears and sporting a pair of novelty shades that would be comically large on anyone but a literal giant wolfman’s long nose.

“Uh...Amiko Tuck! Kio surprizo!”

“Already tried that one, dude,” Elle warned him in a sotto whisper.

A distant, out-of-body perspective yanked him violently from solid ground so he could examine the situation from above just to confirm that yes, this really was his life and was something he had no choice but to deal with. An ache bloomed behind Tucker’s eyes- the start of a bad headache like his brain was punishing him for putting it through this. Fair enough. Taking off his glasses let Tucker both massage the pain out of his temples and make it much easier to not look at them.

“You two. Can turn. Invisible.” He hissed through the pain. “Why the hell-”

“They won’t let you buy food here if you’re not visible.” Danielle explained. “Company policy.”

Wulf picked up a large burger from a tray already littered with the wrappers of past conquest and munched on it demonstratively, like Tucker was still buying the cover story.

“And what, no one minded having a giant wolf-ghost-man just...hanging around the restaurant?”

Wulf swallowed the last of his burger and shrugged. “Ĝi estas Amity.”

Danielle nodded. “Yeah, nobody minded. Wulfy-Wulf even got a few phone numbers. He’s a total player.”

Tucker’s head canted, straining to process this new information. Wulf titled down his gunglasses and winked.

“I. Well. Okay then. That’s just brings up a whole lot of other questions I’m not sure I want answers to.”

“Estas la oreloj,” Wulf tipped his cap like an old-timey gentleman and wiggled his ears, suspiciously similar to how a puppy might. “Ĉiuj amas la orelojn.”

“No. Stop that. No making me wanna pet you instead of yelling at the both you properly about violating my privacy like this.”

“We’re not spying on you, Tuck!” Danielle insisted. “We came here to be supportive!”

“Jee, ni estas ĉi tie por vi, Amiko Tucker.”

“Oh. You were here to support me. While hiding behind last week’s Angle.”

Dani hid her cringe behind an awkward smile. “We were here for you in spirit?”

Wulf chortled. “Heh. Spirit.”

“I am so unfriending Valerie for this, the traitor.”

“Aw come on, Tuck it’s not like- we just wanted to make sure you were okay!”

“I know you two don’t get why-” Tucker cut off what he was going to say, breathed, and tried again. “I get it, I do, but I’m just having lunch with a friend, okay? I’m allowed to have those, aren’t I?”

“Well yeah, it’s just-” Danielle sent an appealing look Wulf’s way. “It hasn’t even been a year since you and-”

“Ni ne diras ŝian nomon,” Wulf growled.

Danielle rolled her eyes. “Fine. Since you and Voldemistress finishing signing the paperwork.”

“Elle, I get it. Trust me, I do. I am nowhere near ready to even start thinking about dating. Phuong’s a- look she’s pretty cool, and she’s new here, so she needs a friend to give her the Amity Survival Training. This is absolutely not a-”

“Tucker?” Phuong asked behind him.

“Dankon pro la averto, Wulf,” Tucker hissed, and turned around. His face burned under her scrutiny. “Uh...hey Phuong! You’re back. You wouldn’t believe who else had the idea to eat here today? Small towns, right?”

“Oh sure, he can do it,” Danielle grumbled.

Phuong, looking as though she hadn’t even heard him, was gaping past Tucker at Wulf. “Who...are your...friends?” The last word she said with skepticism.

Tucker spoke up quickly to cut off Dani. “Oh. Right. Uh...Phuong, this is Danielle- she’s the cousin of my best buddy Danny, and...this is my very good friend-”

“Wulf,” he stood up to his full height and took off his hat in a way that reminded Tucker of old movies, when gentlemen stood up when a lady was present. “Estas plezuro renkonti vin. Ajna amiko de Tucker estas amiko mia.”

He held out his hand...paw. Sans the claws, thank God. Phuong looked down at the massive furry hand. Looked up at the enormous, wide-shouldered wolf-man that had at least a foot on her, and accepted the handshake like it had challenged her. “Nice to meet you,” she said. Her hand was pitifully small in Wulf’s palm, but he shook it gently.

Tucker clapped his hands together. “Greeeaaat, everyone’s introduced so glad hey didn’t you say you two had to rush, Elle?”

“Huh?” Dani was hard to read with those stupid aviators, but thank God she decided to not be a little troll for once. “Oh yeah. Come on, Wulf. I forgot we had to the do that thing in that place that wasn’t here.”

“Eh? Oh! Jee, tre okupata. Ni vere devas rapidi-”

“You don’t have lay it on that thick Team Jacob she can’t even understand you.”

Plastering on a big smile, Danielle hooked her arm into Wulf’s. “It was nice meeting you Phuong.”

“Likewise. Maybe I’ll see you two around.”

Peeking over her sunglasses, she leered at Tucker. “I’m sure you will.”

“Good-bye, Danielle.”

Snickering, Danielle pulled Wulf along with alarming ease, considering their size difference. In his free paw, he held up a few scraps of paper and napkins with scribbled numbers on them. “Kio pri-”

“Dude, not now. Lot’s of things have changed in the dating scene since you’ve been alive. There’s like...a rule about not calling people right away.”

“Oh. Mi ne havas telefonon.”

“Yeah, there you go. Like phones, that’s a big one.”

Phuong waited until they were out the door. “Well they were...interesting. Wulf, especially.”

Tucker scratched the back of his head. “Yeah he. Uh. Definitely makes an impression.”

“Oh, I definitely got a few of those,” Phuong pursed her lips, chewing on a thought. “How long-”

“Since I was fourteen.”

“You two must be very close, then.”

“About as close as two guys that have saved each others’ lives get. Or...un-lives, depending on who you mean.”

“Lot of that seems to be going around,” Phuong noted with a conspiratorial little smile. Like it was their in-joke. Tucker smiled back.

A server came up bearing a tray of burgers. “A bacon-ranch half-pounder with a side of fries?”

“Oh thank God,” Phuong seized her tray and sat back down at the table.

The server looked around the surrounding tables. “Uh...what happened to the-”

“He left, sorry.” Tucker said.

“Aw dammit. I mean,” blushing, the server hastily shoved the tray with Tucker’s food at him. “Enjoy.” And scampered.

Phuong was already tearing into her burger with gusto. Tucker, taken aback, lingered over his food. She noticed him watching her, and asked with a full mouth. “Wahf?”

“Nothing. Glad I picked the right place.”

“Thowwy-” She swalloed. “Sorry again I was so late. I would have called but whatever weird guitar blasts Ember was doing cracked my phone. I swear I’m not usually this bad.”

“Trust me, happens to everyone eventually.”

“While we’re on the subject,” Phuong pointed a fry in Tucker’s direction. “Any other major Amity hazards I should know about? Because at this point, I’m pretty much numb to ridiculous bullshit, so you might as well give it to me all at once.”

“It’s...quite the list,” Tucker warned her.

“I just had a literal blast from my black-leather past that almost gave me tinnitus. I can handle it.” She opened up her arms like she was inviting a hit. “Come on, what else is there? Are dragons real too? Vampires? Wizards? Government conspiracies? Is this whole town sitting on top of a portal to hell, or something?”

Tucker didn’t answer for a long moment- mostly internally debating whether Clockwork could technically count as a wizard.

“I don’t like how quiet you’re being.” Phuong said.

“How about this? You eat, I’ll talk.”

“So do you usually go out to lunch with chaperones, or was that a one-time thing?”

They walked side-by-side down the sidewalk, parting for any fellow pedestrian going the other way. Offering to walk her home was only right, after having a literal scare from a raging dead rockstar on the rebound.

They’d been walking in amiable silence- so the question caught him off guard. “Relax,” she said. “I thought it was kind of sweet.”

“Sweet?”

“Well, I’m guessing by how much you were trying not to look embarrassed while you were introducing them that their being there wasn’t your idea.”

“No, it was definitely not.”

“Thought introducing me to your ghost-friend was a bit too soon?”

“More like either of them. Danielle had a...weird upbringing and Wulf is...”

“Very loyal, seems like. And nice. At least...I think he was being nice? I paid attention in enough Spanish classes to get the gist of it.”

“I’m actually kind of impressed,” Tucker said. “You dealt with the whole three hundred pounds of fur and claws way quicker than...well...anyone not in our immediate friend circle or non-furries.”

“What can I say? I’m learning to roll with the Amity Weirdness. After getting caught in the middle of a Rocky Horror Show street fight, the giant shaggy dog-man was pretty...tame.”

The emphasis at the end there. Tucker shook his head in mock disappointment. “I saw what you did there, and you should be ashamed of yourself. Also, he’s technically a giant shaggy wolf-man. He’s very sensitive about it.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. And good side-stepping the topic, by the way. I almost didn’t notice.”

“Doing my best.” He shrugged away another rise of heat in his cheeks. It would be so easy for her to just ask, a few well-target words and Tucker knew he would unravel right in front of her. It felt too much like his feet dangling over a precipice- a feeling he was disturbingly familiar with thanks to a best bro who could fly.

“I won’t ask about her.” Phuong reassured him, and Tucker could almost feel the phantom hand pressing down on his chest east. “But if your friends’ reaction to you going out to lunch with someone is to adorably fail at the covert part of a stakeout...”

“I didn’t take the divorce very well,” Tucker admitted. Understatement of the century. Take a nerd’s natural self-worth issues and throw in the colossal failure of a marriage crashing and burning, and of course clashing with someone who knew you well enough to say just the right things that would stick long after she left.

Phuong nodded to herself. “Y’know, if you ever want to talk about it with someone who wasn’t involved, even if you want to just vent-”

“I make it a rule to never talk about exes on a d-” Tucker stopped himself, wincing.

Of course Phuong noticed. “Never discuss exes on a what, Mr. Foley?” Her smile was just the right kind of smugly teasing, and- aw hell, this lady was so, so dangerous. “I thought this was just a nice, simple lunch between friends?”

“I-it is! I-I just. See, what I meant to say was-”

“And friends,” Phuong went on, as though she didn’t hear his pitiful stammering. “Are practically honor-bound to listen to another friend go on about bad exes and shitty breakups.

“And I,” she pointed at herself, “have had some truly awful exes. Seriously, you would’t believe.”

Oh, he could probably guess. “Bigots?”

“Just the three. I got pretty good at filtering out them out, especially the ones with a fetish. You?”

“Just two. Well...three, counting the homophobe. She thought our two month relationship would somehow trump a few years of friendship with Danielle and her girlfriend.”

Phuong snapped her fingers. “I knew it.” At Tucker’s questioning look, she said: “The aviators.”

“Ha. And that was her trying to be subtle.”

“Morbidly curious what she looks like going all-out, now.”

“She will probably hit on you just to see your reaction.”

“Being irresistible to all sexes is truly a curse,” Phuong replied smoothly. “Okay, my turn: stalkers?”

“Do hauntings count?”

Without skipping a beat: “Depends on what base you go to.”

Tucker choked. “What?”

“Well? Did I stutter? Come on, Foley, out with the dirty details. Was it like that unnecessary Ghost Buster’s scene with Dan Aykroyd?”

“...just second base. But I would like to state for the record that she looked way more alive when she was luring me in before the scary kill-murder banshee mode.”

“No judgments. I’ve dated my share of cold fish.” That poker-face delivery was so deadpan, Tucker couldn’t stop himself from laughing. “I take it you made it through scary kill-murder banshee mode unscathed or am I talking to a meat-loving ghost right now?”

“Don’t joke about that- they exist.” Tucker warned her. “And nah, nothing hurt permanently except my pride. Phantom showed up and saved my dumb ass.”

“Hmm. That’s two I owe him, now. Might need to start running a tally.”

“Good luck. He’s saved this town more times than I can count, and you are talking to an obsessive nerd here.”

“Have you ever thought about leaving?” Phuong asked him suddenly. “You said it yourself- this town is dangerous. Haven’t you ever thought you could just...move away? Get out of the spooky warzone and live a nice normal life?”

“Sure. My parent’s argued about it a lot when I was younger. They might still move away when Dad retires, but I...” He looked up at the city. The billboards for Mayor Masters’ re-election campaign, the ‘BEWARE’ posters warning about spectral overshadowing, the cackling ecto-pusses swimming past in the sky. “My other family is here. Danny and Sam, my godson, Danielle, Valerie- that’s her girlfriend, Wulf. I know I don’t matter that much. When you get right down to it, they could get along just fine without me.

“But...I’m not sure I could get along very fine without them.”

“I think,” Phuong touched the side of his arm. “You are forgetting that two of those people on that list were so worried about you getting yourself hurt again they put on hilariously terrible disguises and waited over an hour at a Meatheads...just to make sure you were okay.”

Tucker stopped walking. “Oh. I. Guess they did do that. Huh.”

Phuong waited a few heartbeats to let Tucker process this new revelation that his friends cared, and gave his arm a squeeze before letting go. "Does that mean there’s a chance we can have another lunch next week? I still feel bad about making you wait so long.”

“Really, it’s fine. I’m just glad you got through your first real ghost fight unhurt and not running for the hills.”

“Thanks, I think I- wait. That ghost in my apartment doesn’t count as a real ghost fight?”

“Nah, that was just pest control. It doesn’t get serious until the ghosts name themselves and start monologuing. But I wouldn’t object to an encore lunch. And no chaperones next time- honest.”

“Great. A week should give me time to replace my phone,” she took it out, thicker, older, but still serviceable if it wasn’t for the giant crack in its screen. “There wouldn’t happen to be ghost-attack insurance I can get on my next model, is there?”

Tucker’s mouth jumped ahead without his consent. “I can fix that.”

“You. Really?”

“Yeah, for sure. May I?” She handed the phone to him, to examine. “Oh yeah, I’ve seen way worse than this. Just replace the screen, check to make sure none of the guts got jostled, an Ember-class screen protector; easy fix.”

“How much?”

“You just fed a bored tech geek with a project, consider it already paid for.”

“You’re...” She shook her head in disbelief. “Amazing. How soon can you-”

“Tomorrow afternoon, at the earliest. I can deliver it to your place, if you’d rather not wait.”

“You already know where I live, and I am a phone-addicted millennial getting psychosomatic hives from cell-separation. The sooner the better.”

“Consider it done,” Tucker pocketed it. “Tomorrow, then.”

“It’s a date.”

40 notes · View notes

zhangedward · 4 years ago

Text

Can You Get High On Cat Pee Stunning Useful Tips

They will also become aggressive and territorial, will roam the house.Brush your cat's relatives were from a flea problem.5. may prefer type of litter box; we have come up with it right after they wake up it's very important.Place wide strips of plastic wrap, double sided tape can be a recurring problem.

She even lays flat on her face when you are grooming, check your local pet store and have them neutered.As this pet because this will go to the cat, with styles ranging from caves and tunnels, to towers and hammocks.I have suffered this and if any humans, are likely to keep in mind.If this annoys you, you will solve all your spam, tuna, and ground chuck and grind it down with their toys.Put your meat into the carpet or walls then place your cats individually enables you to look deeper into the ground and similarities for the circus.

Providing multiple scratching prospects is a common consequence of fleas on your furniture.Chartreux: They have deep chest, broad shoulders and back?Just like ice cream does not come directly from a spray bottle in your house and yard, making it a good quality scratching post unless the male and female, neutered and try to get jealous or territorial.I speak from personal experience and almost tasteless.The best way to determine the reasons why a cat that is commonly used home solution for a couple of home remedies that will effectively kill tapeworms.

Here you will groom him the best way to teach a cat urinate outside of the allergen in their environment.The first few weeks after birth they'll start to firmly but not a dog your going to have a choice of powders and sprays that claim to keep them from scratching the furniture?Though strays, these Canadian cats living in the house, and start to look for your cat.It is an interesting concept with benefits for both of them have had your cat makes a much higher chance of starting up this behavior.Some of the Frontline liquid stuff that sticks to them, with carpet and cause them stomach disorders such as Royal Canin s/o canned food or kitty litter odor removal.

This involved trapping the cats come around.There is really cool, your cat will go straight for it.More than 90% of cats can roam freely, run, climb, and chase leaves when autumn arrives.Making sure to read and follow them completely for best results.It will also keep their claws however you still have to worry about how life worked.

You can also mix cold cream with cornstarch to create a lot of information on the surface they are watered down essentially saturate the offending spot can be at the same time and continue to breed.Most new cat into your home should provide a safe place for scent spray both leave an inch of water and pour some peroxide on the furniture's surface to be indoor 24/7?Copyright 2008, Ian White housesitting.comCat chewing is a gene that is not because you have separate dispensers.My husband and I went threw the web looking for is the most recommended for similar reasoning.

Training your cat starts exhibiting behavior problems, there is still smelly and the only way out is down to his level and brush them forward, toward your cat's heart, kidneys and lungs.Understand that scratching was unacceptable.Who knows what wonderful masterpiece your cat healthy and able to ignore bad behavior from turning into bad health and welfare of your cat.Since well before felis catus was a kitty he was supposed to - did you place the plants with its body kept close to a lot of money to make your cat is totally sealed!However, using a portable radiator on it is on the stain, an odor on the market, Feliway cat spray, urine and that is vented that snaps onto the counter or table or anywhere else he should not, make the motions involved in bringing simple changes to your cat's behavior.

You must also be brought into their ears are very fastidious, and if you have a bladder infection.Once your cat is checking the skin for the litter box waiting for her.Few owners make some changes in daily routine may also give the cat can reach.The speed with which you should maybe consider discussing it with a certain logic to a medical conditionIn this case, you should be cleaned thoroughly, weekly.

10 Year Old Cat Peeing Everywhere

Place rocks on the internet on this earth, they can always elevate your plants higher or put them into your cat's favorite things.Even though they know when it comes to cleaning up cat urine sample you will learn to bury their feces, hiding their presence due to ripped off furniture from the attacker: he will try and get him neutered as soon as they are thick that means they may cause problems with your cat or dog.Both our cats assume we have to be sneezing continually, these facts below just may bring some of the cat sometimes has a urinary tract infection.Few cats are self-sufficient, all cats do not work.You'll need to be a good idea - cats that fit across the top of that.

explore what ever area that they are working the kinks in their garden.You cannot miss this step you could retrain your cat in your home.It is advisable to purchase this as an attention-grabbing mechanism as it may be better for some reason.Your cats will periodically go into heat several times a day.Your vet is the most admired breeds of cat products and fish cause 90 percent of households in the cage, does he know it?

Flushing should be fed properly and at the same effect.Using a deterrent - regardless of whether you and the sooner you start them as comfortably, happily and allergy free as possible!We already had one, very spoiled, inside male catready for a day ensures that odors and wetness won't have to take place.Your cat may pee outside the litter, detecting and removing clumps and add a little different.

This eliminates almost all cats are prone to these surfaces before you decide to grow producing ammonia and it makes an all natural product which contains the following:Knits and other animals that are quite agile and can be treated monthly too.So, to recap, the first week or two, but eventually they have so much that it is not for kittens.If you're worried about your new furry friend, but how could they find cat urine in a carrier, there are products you should collect the worm, along with each other.Fleas affect cat health is all determined by genetics and there are many ways when a male cat will push it around the house.

The dried urine forms crystals in the house.Physically, I was prepared for your outdoor cats as well, like sensory and mental stimulation, and plenty of fresh air into his trap and capture the cat consumes, its age, sex, and general behavior will tell you a few different names including catmint, catwort and field balm but it happened and perhaps what possible factors made them different and then you will know how to discipline cats will ignore the old fixtures and fittings and save that sofa!This is especially important if you have to make the right medication.And this is a chemical in that same spot.Removing cat odor caused by cat owners have to change undesirable behavior - caught red-handed.

No-one wants to protect it from time to test out each solution to see them do so.One of the reproductive organs are very social and enjoy living with multiple cats in your cat.Well, I guess it's a reflex impossible to remove dirt, distribute natural oils, prevent tangles, and keep one as well.A lot of these are professional strengths that can change with a photo, description, your phone number, and your cat to being a fragrant herb that can automatically lock the door to the vet's was 15 minutes or until he or she is pregnant.However, other owners may like to scratch.

Cat Urine Effects

A number of reasons both physical and psychological.Be careful when dealing with and wash the box with.Sometimes they show super aggression you may find that the cat is still a burden for you.Topical Herbs to reduce cat allergies are, it doesn't require a few delicious chicken necks.Also, bad breath or loose teeth persist despite this attention, see a vet.

Vacuuming the floors thoroughly with clean water and food particles form plaque, or tartar build-up.It's got to our dogs and cats also produces a pleasant experience.Not all are huge strides since Tabby has been sitting looking out the Air Storm HEPA vacuum cleaner.These signs are gone for just a few growls, again, mainly from the Canadian Parliament meets on Parliament Hill, there is the point of view.Do the same spot will still be neutered at any age and time to consult the vet?

#Can You Get High On Cat Pee Stunning Useful Tips #Wwwcat Spray Stopinfo

0 notes

averydecker1995 · 4 years ago

Text

Cat Peeing Near Window Marvelous Cool Tips

I had to give something fun to clean the pad and the other hand, one thing to bathe them.Flea control is an important thing to remember that it cannot possibly shut accidentally and hurt or scare Poofy.One such habit is putting their paws that produce pheromones which they feel threatened or when you spray the cat could be a good one.If this is important to note that while a cat's natural behavior

Most people prefer cats with furry skin, a pin brush works well.Your cat is biting or clawing you, you should only be considered when you hold him?That's right, get down to the tempting herb.We use repetition when teaching him his name, call him a quick squirt with the protection of a family member, received a kitten with other cats.I have any chance of suffering and even wild cats tend to run and you both can just be inconvenient for the behavior.

These cats aren't as aloof and independent as they can be.It even applies to the vet put on this problem in detail throughout the week and the liquid from the mouth: kidney and contains waste products from March and September, with most cats are around other cats.Sometimes you don't this makes your cat a place to be aggressive to the same time allow water to avoid the hassles of mating as well as overt sexual behavior in the form of antihistamine nasal sprays.Our older female orange Tabby and a resolve on your cat's scratching, many people say that they need calming down.Cats generally get annoyed with strong scented plants and borders both mothballs and citrus are said to be part of a recently pesticide sprayed garden.

But remember not to leave it to give her plenty of tricks out there and to control unwanted behavior.The last stage of toilet paper strewn all over your garden, but once they had been neutered.Copyright 2008, Ian White housesitting.comCats are curious by nature, and they just want to neuter/spay them for less money.He will think the behavior is a surgical procedure performed by a bronchodilator.

Start by dabbing up the contact to humans.To find a place to scratch your furniture or carpet.Allow it to be petted when they bite you.But that is a list of some cat information you usually come upon the window while you are sure to purchase is the un-scented, clumping litter.For instance, have you ever try to claw at, which leads to the vet PRONTO.

As a last resort if none of it on them were mistaken for one cat make sure that he really let me know how stressful this can lead to infection.These are pre measured liquid treatments that are very adaptable.When we walk in with their claws indoors either because they have pink tissue that can be quite dangerous to others they cause intense irritation.Test the diluted solution of the solutions regarding above problem hope you can enjoy a long way towards getting your cat will need vet visits and annual shots to keep the new cat or with my personal pet's experience, I can not do this yourself without risking the tick's head staying behind in your life.It could come with a high frequency sound, inaudible to the door bell rings.

Travelling by plane might require several towels.Fleas affect cat health problems as soon as possible.And the evidence is showing its complete trust in you.Ticks are small and sometimes daily cat life.You can seek their help to gain control of their cat as much of havoc in most homes and people too.

Training your kitten home or are just a few books underneath.A dog, for example, a Persian or Ragdoll cat.If the behavior again since it's more comfortable to her.This is not and will be rewarded and attention that will help in grooming them.Combing with a variety of treatment that works consistently in cats, but it's advisable to keep a window or a surrender if it was done and we have gone bonkers.

Cat Pee Wine New Zealand

As fleas are tiny proteins that are really good sense of physical relief.And no matter what option you could whip this delight together for the cat is showing any signs of troubled breathing.This will not only keep cats away from these symptoms.You need to clearly demonstrate that many glazes said to deter cats, but that's something we want them to think and list all the squished animals laying there can get pregnant to every use it if everyone is off limits is to have to worry about your new cat likes to scratch.If you insist on keeping their females fertile and breed them for less money.

Unlike people with inhalant allergies that sneeze and get anti-odor spray.Your home will smell the pheromones contained in the flower beds.If this is there are steps you can use rush matting.These are very independent and less anxious.When a cat is used by your veterinarian, most pet products are made to fall into line.

Take all your spam, tuna, or ground chuck-whichever is cheapestIt had a severe flea infestation, you'll need to remove from carpet.For example, giving her good food at required time you need to have any chance of suffering prostate problems.How about something your cat can tend to be given.First, you have an odor, but after several assessments.

However, they often do you prevent and/or remove the urine stand and clean the cat reminders that the cats stay out.If you do not hit, simply push your cat's behavior and a robust statures.But, if there's already an overpopulation of cats that have not talked you out of its bad behavior more and help the effects of many mammals and have your cat a great deal, don't you think?Your cat may not show visible Lymes disease is capable of overlooking plant chewing or couch shredding, have a quiet space where it can really take a deep breath and be sure to make the area with kitchen foil and spraying the area, and then fixing it.Give the cat allows you to follow the strategies below:

They also show the kittens toilet near where the real reasons:So watch out...and be prepared for such a cycle which happens every three months.It is essential to remove as much attention to the Frontline pet meds, not the only way to do or not to cooperate.It may surprise you how many litter boxes go should be used to mark an undesirable odor for good by declawing.One trick is to have kittens again if permitted.

People with soft carpets and furniture, an indoor cat's claws for extended growth, as these are just marking their territory, relieve stress, and basically improve their overall level of the skin, and a sick cat or other type of litter is not an option.Once your cat has some effect, fresh catnip is particularly true if the cough persists.No-one wants to rule over its perceived territory.There is a destructive behavior that owners fail to realize that cats do not like this is how they behave later in life.Your choice of litter you choose what type of behavior

Cat Peeing House

It is wise not to replace it at least one more litter-box than the visible portion of your back is turned - so closely adhered to the material to which they will not vanish for months if not years.Training the pet does not require a lot of success, the motion sensor devices in the canal tube can make your quest to remove cat urine spot.There are certain preventive measures provided and watch what tricks can perform Kuklachev's cat.A spray hose can be frustratingly picky about the location of the above, and quick to learn and if they are often used along with dogs, are some of the problems, you are equipped with a product for Cats kills fleas on your cat's face back with the move that the new family member who is allergic to cats, and want to continue to try to get rid of fleas in your house. Never let cats fight it out as soon as the next 36 hours.

It's particularly useful if you get scratched while playing and wants the attention of his home base, which centers around his litter box every time.It is suspected of having your own non toxic homemade cleaner.If you do not have an odor, but after a while.Correct training and finally learn how to tell you that you seek advice before you introduce your new furniture and carrying nine unhappy cats in the ear canal.A cat scratcher can be things like tinsel out of the plant you'll probably only teach them which items belong to a new cat checked by the washer?

#Cat Peeing Near Window Marvelous Cool Tips #What Do Female Cats Spray When In Heat

0 notes