#hghh
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I worry that people are mad at me so often and the unfortunate part about that is even if I haven't done anything to make them mad ( but what if smthn I did was misinterpreted?? How would I even know??) my brain will manage to convince me that not only are they mad at me but I MUST have done SOMETHING.
Which wouldn't be as convincing without the fact that I HAVE had a couple of instances where I have totally blacked out for a second and done something. I mean I was a kid but what if amiright?
#the first time was at Christmas and I litetally blacked out for a second and fell#Thankfully i didnt do anythung but one second i was going to sit on the arm of a couch and the next i was falling#the other time i was on the bus with my friend#and i was holding a pen#and then i blacked out for a secons and scribbled on smthn important to them#idk why i did that#i dont remember what i said afterward#and i dont think we ever discussed it again#but like#what was that#anyway so now that ive rememvered that can happen my brain is trying to convince me that maybe i just blacked out#and said something or did something#when I was a kid it was only twice and it was for literal seconds but what if now that im older#its longer#anyway#this has been me talking#vent#technically not a vent#idk what to call tjis#the blacking out thing is quite literal#black screen moment#i dont thunk its happened since#i hope not#i also hope im not making all that up for some reasom#genuinely thats how i rememver it#but maybe i DID do it on purpose#hghh#im having a bad time lmao#im just v anxious
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October...
#ive decided im not using promps for inktober and that idc#go eug#drawtectives#drawfee#eugene finch#drawtectives fanart#hghh#grayscale
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I hauve to go to my dads birthday dinner acting like my brain isn’t shattered after finishing harrow the ninth
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hhuoouhh ow
#lca#lego city adventures#chief wheeler#wheelie lca#start post#i feel. hungover#please say im not#hghh
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Azazel and meg and 5x03 and lucifer and gadreel (and all the other times someone tied him, fingered his wounds, pulled his hair and spat on his face and mouth) were not enough i need Sam to get violated physically brutally more often
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my ass will be like “idc abt romance at all. shit sucks lmao” and then all i ever draw is romantical intimate shit for fictional couples i made up in my head
#i SWEAR i draw other things.#it’s just that…#hghh#halbarry ruined my life#i love them both as individuals and together#but thinking abt them together is like a drug#they’re a virus listen#two sides of the same coin#mirrors of each other#soulmates in every sense of the word#platonic or romantic doesn’t matter it doesn’t exist#there isn’t a line#the love is there no matter what and that’s powerful#never been so whipped abt a ship in my entire life. why do THEY get to be special#huge possibility that i’m just lonely though#but alas. 🧍♂️#their cringefail ways and fucked up beyond repair minds have captivated me
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Oh I did not get that campfire cutscene the first time through the campaign
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amane coming back to that seaside village for the nth time in a row to meet up with his childhood friend who's riddled with secrets and stuff lol
#toilet bound hanako kun#jibaku shounen hanako kun#yashiro nene#anime#my art#oof#yeah its a thing from a recent fic of mine#hghh#and its hananene as always#like there's anything new from me anyways haha
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i might be sick.
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um hey brain if you'd like to let me actually WRITE that would be largely appreciated thank you <3
#please#i got myself so lost with the order of this chapter though ;;;#and it threw me off so far that now i can't figure out what i'm actually trying to DO with this part of the fic#hghh#i think this is going to have to be 'get the main info out and you can fix it later'#which i hate doing but it may help get me re-oriented#shh ac#(wit)jitp#trying to see how many words i can get in the next 40min hhh
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I promise I'm gonna answer asks/tags when I can (probably tomorrow) I've ben very very busy and am knee deep in IRL stuff as well as drawing stuff ;-;
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episode 32 and 33 of nightvale <- pained
#im. aughgh.#first strexcorp and#YOUNG CECIL.#its so jarring#switching from present cecil to young cecil and back again#two different people#its making me. very emotional#hghh#nebula rambles
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Thinking about Piers Nivans. He is in my head GET OUT GET OUT GET-
#HGHH#you know when you do the brainrot 'oh i'm doing this real life thing just like (x) character would ahahaha' just in your head involuntarily#when I work out it's usually Chris (weightlifting) or Leon (cardio) but today it was Piers what
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post fateful reunion seth meets child adam, jonah, sarah and cesar, what shall he do
Cry
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"Cognitive dissonance is an uncomfortable feeling caused by holding two conflicting ideas simultaneously."
- Spec Ops: The Line
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Sif drew the blue trio so of course I had to put them in a tower
Resonant Chimes - @skybristle
Blurred Reflection of Self - @kociamieta
Infinite Possibilities; Creation Unending - :]
#zoc scrambled#zoc artwork#zoc shack#LANDS_EDGE#but only for Creativity#artfight#rain world#rw oc#rw iterator#I know I draw Tivi towers a lot but it's just#a doodle thing#simple little doodles#my blue trio :]#auugh HGHH rhrh help me
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