#hey purgatory part 5

[lillybearrie]

Hello I would like to remind everyone that the first (technically second if you wanna get really technical but who cares) thing we heard from fable was

"Release Me,

You are free of Enderian, now focus on purpose"

Directed at Icarus

"Now focus on your purpose"????? WHAT HAPPENED TO "HI" "HELLO" "HOW ARE YOU MY SON"

BECAUSE NEWSFLASH SIR THAT'S NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR FUCKING CHILD

THEY AREN'T A FUCKING ROBOT TO TAKE AND CARRY OUT YOUR ORDERS THAT'S YOUR GODDAMN KID!

PEOPLE TREATED SEVEN WITH MORE FAMIARITY AND RESPECT

no offense to seven great guy rip man BUT STILL

Anyway on to actual analysis

After reading this note, several deductions can be made about our antagonist's character right off the bat, which in season 3 we see to be accurate assumptions

First of all the sending of the note "release me" constantly at the beginning of every reset presumably for the past several ones gives us a base line of a few things A) whoever wrote it is trapped B) they really want out C) whomever was to recive the note presumably can help with this D) this person is either very angry and resorting to formal wording as a form of passive aggression or they are simply a very formal person Had this not been the case they would have written "let me out" or "get me out" or even "help me"

Now for the post-corruption portion

"You are free of Enderian"

1) this person knows Enderian 2) This person knows at least of Icarus 3) They intentionally have been sending these to Icarus 4) despite being trapped they have some way to know what is going on 5) their particular view of Enderian is not favorable it's not overtly antagonistic however this is the one part of the not that can be read as at least partially sympathetic to Icarus

Finally "Now focus on your purpose"

1) they don't see Icarus as anything but a means to an end 2) tone wise it feels like both the chastisement of a child and an order to an unthinking being 3) "your purpose" seemingly refers to the prior statement of "release me" either implying that the writer believes Icarus is only here to get them out of wherever they are or that Icarus's sole purpose in life is to aid and assist them and 4) the use of "now" after the previous statement implies they view the corruption arc as simply something that was inhibiting the progression of them being let out

First off once again SIR THAT IS YOUR CHILD YOU MOTHERFUCKER-

In conclusion deductions that can be made from this note with the knowledge that i now hold are as follows: Fable wanted out of purgatory, they issued Icarus with the fulfillment of this task and saw the corruption arc as merely a speed bump on the road of getting his ass outta there. Fable is a pretentious douchebag. Like everyone else in his life Fable is constantly using his own son as a means to achieving his end goal.

Other notes:

Had Fable's motivations not been his underlying obsession with keeping what he believes is "his" even when it disrupts and disregards the rules of the universe and the sanctity of life he likely wouldn't have given 2 shits about Icarus.

If we view Fable's interactions with others through the lense of him thinking of those of the overworld as "his" his people his creations his world then it starts to become clearer that he only sees individuals as tools and for their potential usefulness to him. And if we want to take this view even further we could even say that he at least on some level viewed Alerion giving a place for his deceased mortals to restate something akin to how a child views their sibling stealing a toy from their room, which then implies that the war of the gods is just a big temper tantrum where Fable hurt his brother then his other siblings stepped in and went "hey woah man not cool you can hit Al dude he is literally just playing the game" to which Fable's response was to hurt them as well and now he's just got out of timeout and basically started blaming his parents for everything wrong in his life which is so silly goofy of him until you remember that these were people he was upset about his brother "stealing" from him and it becomes less silly goofy.

"But Lilly!" I hear you say because you've totally read this far, mhm definitely "If he doesn't actually care about the dead people, then why does he act nice? Why is his charisma stat so high?" Well to that I say is it easier to keep someone in one spot when you make them believe this is where they wanna be or when they know the whole truth?

[luvangelbreak]

Deprived | Twenty-one

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 22 Part 23 matthew sturniolo x layla venita (female!oc) summary: everyone knows the story of the bad boy and the good girl but what happens when the school's most popular boy, Matthew Sturniolo, and the girl who notoriously is never there, Layla Venita, cross paths. warnings: swearing, mentions of blood, injuries word count: 2.8k a/n: gasp!!

pov: matt

"Hey pretty boy," Layla's voice rang through the cold air as I felt her arms wrap around my waist, her chest pressed to my back as she leaned up to kiss me on the cheek. I smiled as I placed my hands on hers before turning my head to look back at her smiling face.

"Hey," I murmured as I leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. She smiled against me before someone cleared their throat. She pulled away from me and I turned around to see Mia glaring at us from where she stood between Nate and Nick.

Layla moved to stand next to me but I grabbed her wrist, pulling her to stand in front of me as I leaned back against the side of the minivan. I wrapped my hands around her waist before I placed my chin on her shoulder. She placed her hands over mine as she leaned back into me comfortably.

I didn't realise how much I missed being close to her until I lost the opportunity to. The past week my mind had been in a constant state of purgatory, torn between trying to fix whatever rift was between us or deciding if I didn't want to talk to her anymore. Of course, the latter was at the forefront of my mind when I was initially angry but I knew it would hurt me more in the long run. It was a short-term solution and it wasn't what I really wanted.

What happened wasn't worth losing her over.

"You wanna come over?" I asked her quietly and she shivered from my breath fanning against her neck.

"I can't," she answered quietly and I furrowed my eyebrows as she turned to look at me, her brown eyes glowing in the small sunlight that peaked between the clouds, "Gotta help my dad with something."

"Can I come over then?" I asked and she pursed her lips, her eyes scanning my face before she shook her head.

"It's family stuff. I'm sorry," she leaned back, kissing my cheek gently before turning to face the group that was stood in front of us. As much as it bummed me out that I couldn't spend the rest of the day with her, I understood that I couldn't insert myself into her life with no boundaries.

I let my mind travel to tomorrow, realising it was our last game of the season and it was the deciding factor of whether or not we won the finals. I realised that I never updated Layla on our game last week.

"We're onto the finals by the way," I whispered, pulling her attention away from our friends once again and she whipped her head around to look at me, "Tomorrow's the last game."

"You won?" she asked excitedly and I smiled gently, nodding my head as I did so, "That's amazing!"

"What's amazing?" Chris asked, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he looked at us and Layla smiled as she turned to look at me.

"You guys are in the finals!" she told him with joy and he nodded, a proud smile covering his face, "Why did no one tell me?"

"Probably because you were being a bitch," Mia rolled her eyes and I let my face drop as I felt Layla's energy shift, her shoulders slumping slightly.

"Can you shut the fuck up, Mia?" I spat, my built-up frustration towards her finally spilling over and she frowned as she looked at me in disbelief, "If anything you're the one being a fucking bitch right now."

"Are you serious?" she asked, her mouth hung open as she stared at me and Layla laced her fingers with mine. She squeezed my hand in an attempt to calm me down.

"Dead serious. I told you if you don't stop I'm not gonna be your friend and I'm getting real fucking close to following through with that," I deadpanned, not feeling an ounce of guilt as her face contorted into hurt, "You have no reason to be such a bitch to Layla so fucking stop."

"I can't believe you," she mumbled, her face turning sour as she spun around and began walking out of the parking lot.

"Matt, you didn't have to be so hard on her," Allie spoke softly and I raised my eyebrows as I looked at her.

"How else is she gonna know that I'm that I'm serious? She hasn't listened to me this far," I explained, anger laced through the words that came out through gritted teeth and Layla once again squeezed my hand. I sighed, placing my forehead on her shoulder to calm myself down.

"It's okay," Layla said softly as she ran her thumb across the back of my hand and I shook my head against her shoulder.

"No, it's not," I mumbled and she sighed, leaning her head on top of mine. I felt a sense of peace wash over me, the rest of the world fading away as I only focused on her.

The way she smelled, the way her hand felt in mine, the way her thumb gently caressed the back of my hand and the way her breathing began matching mine. I lost track of time when I was with her, the only time my brain truly shut off was when I was around her. I craved that moment of us alone again and I knew she could sense that.

"Matt," Nick called my name and I reluctantly lifted my head to look at him, "Mom said we need to go grocery shopping for dinner. We gotta leave soon."

"Oh for fucks sake," I grumbled and Layla giggled under her breath making me look at her with a frown, "What?"

"Nothing," she shrugged, a smile still on her lips as I continued to stare at her, "You're just funny when you're grumpy."

"Alright, Miserable Matt. Let's go," Chris rolled his eyes as he rounded the car to jump in the passenger side and I let my frown deepen at the nickname that had stuck anytime I was anything but happy.

"I don't wanna go," I grumbled quietly enough that only Layla could hear as Nick began climbing into the backseat and Layla slowly pulled away from me as I groaned. She spun around to face me as she gave me a gentle smile.

"I'll see you tomorrow, pretty boy," she leaned in, pressing a kiss to my lips before pulling away. She knew I'd get carried away if she let the kiss linger for too long, "Have fun, Miserable Matt."

"Fuck you," I rolled my eyes as she began walking away and I pushed away from the car to stand up.

"I know you want to!" she called cheekily making me snicker as I jumped into the car, mumbling a goodbye to Nate and Allie as they got into his car.

+++

I don't know how many times I'd checked my phone since I messaged Layla asking if we could Facetime. It had been 3 hours and she still hadn't read my message. I was checking my phone every 5 minutes to see if she had replied.

"Dude," Chris deadpanned and I looked over at him from where he sat on the couch, "What are you stressing about?"

"Nothing," I brushed him off and he rolled his eyes, shaking his head as he went back to scrolling aimlessly on his phone, not bothering to pry further. I picked up my phone again, the notifications still empty and I sighed loudly.

"If you don't put that fucking phone down Matt I'm gonna throw it in the pool," Nick deadpanned and I looked over at him with a frown, "She'll reply when she has a moment. Stop being a psycho."

"I'm not being a psycho," I rolled my eyes, locking my phone as I put it face down on the couch. I slouched further back onto the couch as I crossed my arms over my chest, my eyes drifting back to the TV where a random movie was playing.

"I didn't know you were so clingy," Chris joked as he continued scrolling on his phone and I ignored him as I chewed on the inside of my cheek. Suddenly, there was a knock at the front door and I frowned, looking between my brothers.

"We expecting anyone?" I questioned as I got up from the couch, knowing both of my parents were already in bed so it wouldn't be anyone here for them. Both Nick and Chris shook their heads and I hesitantly walked to the front door. I swung it open to find Layla standing there with trembling hands and shaky breaths leaving her mouth. Her hair was covering the majority of her face but when she looked up at me, my heart dropped.

"I didn't have anywhere else to go," she choked out as tears sprung to her eyes and I froze for a moment, my body not knowing how to handle the situation.

"Matt, who is it?" I heard Nick's voice appear behind me for a moment before he gasped, "Holy shit. Layls, are you okay?"

"What's going on?" Chris asked and I ignored him as I grabbed Layla's arm to pull her inside. I didn't even close the front door behind me as I pulled her into the kitchen.

"Here, sit on the bench," I told her as shoved the various papers away from the edge of the island before I held her waist to help her up onto the cold marble, "Chris, get the first aid kit."

Chris didn't respond, I only heard him run down the hall to get the first aid kit from the bathroom as Layla caught her breath in front of me. Nick walked over to the freezer, grabbing out an ice pack as I placed my hand on her thigh.

"Baby, are you hurt anywhere else?" I asked, my voice shaking as I took in the pure terror in her eyes and she nodded her head, "Can you tell me where?"

"My back," she croaked out and I sighed when Chris returned with the first aid kit, quickly unpacking it on the bench beside her.

"Can I take this off? I just wanna check the rest of your body," I asked her softly as I grabbed the hem of the pink sweater that had drops of blood splattered over it. She didn't respond verbally, only nodded her head as she unravelled her arms from around her stomach.

I gently pulled the crewneck up as she lifted her arms up for me to slide the material over her head. She was only wearing a thin tank top underneath so it made it easier for me to scan her body for any damage. My heart cracked in my chest when I noticed the myriad of bruises littering her body as she covered her face with her hands. I moved around her, noticing the giant bruise on the lower half of her back. I tried not to stare too long knowing it would make her feel insecure so I let out a breath as I grabbed her wrists to pull her hands away from her face as she sniffled.

"Let me help pretty girl," I whispered as she continued looking down between us in shame and she once again nodded. Chris and Nick just stared at me in worry, their entire demeanour towards her changing now that they realised she was in some sort of danger. I could tell they wanted to help but weren't sure how. I let my eyes scan her face, the cut on her right cheekbone continued bleeding as it dripped down her face slowly and the split on her lip had dried blood around it.

"I can clean the cuts if you want," Chris spoke up softly and Layla turned her head to look at him as she tried to keep herself calm, "I know how to do it properly."

"You okay with that?" I asked her as I grabbed her hand and she hesitated for a moment before she nodded. Chris quickly grabbed the gauze and disinfectant wipes as I moved to stand to her left, still holding onto her hand to bring her any sort of comfort that I could.

"This might sting a little," Chris mumbled as he tore open the packet of wipes before unfolding it. Layla moved her hair out of her face, holding it back with a shaking hand as Chris moved to stand between her legs. As he began wiping around the small gash, she hissed from the pain, "Sorry. I'll try to be quick."

"Matt," Nick said from behind Layla on the other side of the island making me look up at him. He tilted his head down towards her lower back and I leaned forward, noticing the bruise on her lower back seemed to get worse by the minute before he asked Layla quietly, "Layls, does it feel like anything is broken?"

She took a moment to let Chris pull away as her face screwed up in pain before she muttered, "No. Just my back really hurts."

"Can I put the ice pack on it?" Nick asked and she hummed as Chris picked up the tweezers.

"This is gonna hurt," Chris let her know and she hummed once again as Nick placed the ice pack against her back. Chris began picking out small shards of glass that were stuck on the edge of the cut as Layla squeezed my hand. She let out a groan and Chris pursed his lip as he tried to work quickly before he mumbled, "Almost done."

He put the tweezers down before grabbing another disinfectant wipe, ripping the packet open and quickly wiping the cut gently once again. He grabbed another gauze and placed it over the cut before he leaned back.

"Hold that there until the bleeding stops then I'll tape a clean one on after," he explained, his voice calm as she nodded. She replaced his hand with her own, "I'm gonna clean your lip but if you put an icepack on it after it will heal fine."

She hummed in response as he used the disinfectant wipe to clean the cut on her lip before he pulled away and stepped back. She gave him a small smile that didn't reach her eyes as she whispered, "Thank you."

"Of course," Chris shrugged as he grabbed the wipes and the rest of the trash on the bench beside her.

"Here," Nick said as he leaned over the island and handed me another small ice pack. I nodded thankfully before I placed the ice pack on her lip and she looked at me with heavy eyes. I gave her a small smile as I leaned forward, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"You okay?" I asked quietly and she closed her eyes, shrugging as she shivered.

"Let us know if you guys need anything," Nick said as he rounded the island and Layla looked at them both with sad eyes.

"Sorry for just walking in like this," she said quietly, her voice filled with shame and Nick shook his head as Chris stood in the doorway to go down the hall.

"It's okay. Just glad to know you're okay," he said softly and she gave him a small smile. Both of them exited the room and I moved to stand between her legs, still holding the ice pack against her lip as I looked down at her.

She didn't say anything, she just grabbed my wrist to pull my hand away that was holding the ice pack and she placed her forehead on my chest with a sigh. I let my shoulders drop as I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and pulled her into me.

We stood like that for a moment in silence as I let her breathe, looking down at her back where the bruise seemed to now be fully formed. I felt a weight on my chest, an anger flushing over me towards whoever did this to her. I knew being angry wouldn't help her right now but I couldn't push down the feeling as it rose throughout my body.

"I'm so tired," she mumbled, snapping me out of my own thoughts as she pulled away from me slightly and I looked down at her once again tear-filled eyes, "This is just so tiring."

"I'm sorry, pretty girl," I whispered as I placed another kiss on her forehead, a few tears spilling down her red cheeks as she tried to steady her breathing, "Do you want to go to my room? We can just lay down for a bit."

She let out a shaky breath before nodding and I pulled away from her. I helped her off of the counter and she grabbed the pink sweater as I grabbed the large ice pack that was against her back. I threw it in the freezer, grabbing a bag of frozen peas since it would cover the surface of her back more before I grabbed her hand and we made our way upstairs slowly, her legs shaky as she walked. As we made our way into my bedroom the only thing that ran through my mind was:

Whoever did this to her, they're going to wish they were dead once I find out.

tags:

@dsturniolo @chrisstankyleg @lov3bug @pinklittleflower @thatcrazybitch-69 @trinity2058 @alorsxsturn @chrizznmetswife @ilovechrissturniolo1 @leprechaunbirthdaygirl @sturnfix @lilsstvrn @sturniololol @sturniolowhore @jebbie-project-blog @jaxyy219

[gabsword]

Little rant about Wynonna Earp: Vengeance.

I am someone who has a deep love and nostalgia for this show, it was a really important part of my coming out and discovering myself journey etc and I can honestly say I was obsessed with Wynonna Earp. With that in mind I did genuinely quite enjoy Vengeance and I’m so happy to see all the characters again so any of my criticisms are with that love in mind. That being said there were quite a few choices that frustrated me that I have to get off my chest.

Lowkey afraid to post this because I know so much of the fandom think Wynonna Earp is immune to any criticism (read: the whole racism debacle).

Also I’m sure a lot of my criticisms could also be levied at the show itself but tbh I haven’t rewatched it since it came out so I’d have to rewatch it and put on my critical brain.

SPOILERS BELOW

1. I think the more the show puts Mercedes through the wringer the less of an impact it has. As awful as it sounds I kinda wish something happening to one of the other characters (eg. Nicole) but not necessarily death, could’ve been the catalyst. (I’m less strongly opinionated on this point I just thought it’s worth mentioning.)

2. I though the fight choreography was pretty shit, I felt absolutely no stakes during the hell hound attacks.

3. This might be a controversial opinion, but I think there WASN’T ENOUGH fan service. Considering this is a reunion almost entirely aimed at fans on a random-ass streaming service, intended to lean in to fans nostalgia. Unless I’ve missed it they only mentioned Dolls once (quite subtly and they mention Bunny Fucking Loblaw more than him) never mentioned Rosita, Robin, Chrissy, Rachel Valdez, Kate etc etc and again I might have missed this but they didn’t even mention Julian??? Glad Jeremy showed up at the end though

These next three are the most egregious in my opinion.

4. WHY TF DID THEY MAKE WYNONNA A COP??? It makes no fucking sense for her character. So much of her character arc is about distancing herself from her father and making her own path then she follows in his footsteps???? If they wanted to give her a job to show she was settling into the Purgatory community and still on the look out for demons she could have I don’t know, been a Park Ranger or a PI or literally anything else. Like I get that she has people she trusts and loves on the force in Nicole and formerly Randy but this still doesn’t make sense to me and feels like more copaganda than the show already has.

5. Wtf does Emily Andras have against Wynonna being happy with her child. At the very least even if it was unsafe for Alice to live with Wynonna they could show her visiting her and forming a relationship (which she so desperately wants). It also feels like a disservice to Doc to not follow that up. I wish the ending had been Wynonna sitting with Alice and telling her about Doc instead of just ‘hey welcome to the force! Congrats!’

6. Considering the show has such limited representations of First Nations peoples (I’m struggling to think of any), the only Native American character being a demon feels dodgy af to me. But that alone could theoretically be talked out of as ‘there are demons of every race’. Ok, then WTF would you have your main character making fun of the Native characters calling her ancestor a coloniser??

[shallowseeker]

There are a lot of nervous breakdowns in SPN that are very tied up with delayed grief reactions.

S4 Sam - Drinking demon blood is a reaction to losing Dean; to being horrified that Dean could die and having a disgust-reaction to his weakness as a way to protect himself from the emotions he has about Dean's mortality; Sam was desperate to be stronger. He couldn't unpack why.

S6 Cas - Being murdered by Heaven (Raphael), and though he returned to Heaven to be "the new sheriff," he was paranoid of even the angels close to him because of *waves at all of S4-5* That paranoia and withdrawal into himself reached into every relationship he has. He watched his loved ones suffer, so he decided to be the one to "Put a Stop to It--to All of It"

S7 Cas - Nihilism; (The endless repetition of life and deriving no meaning from it; route of flowers being a predestined plan is also a "nothing matters" nod); Feelings of guilt and the need for penance, terminating in s8 "suicide" / wanting to stay in purgatory *is* suicide btw

S8 Cas - Brainwashing redux; Guilt, Becoming human, lots of changes here, as a result of the brainwashing he needs space to figure out what he's feeling and who he trusts; ALSO Feeling afraid of heaven (re: The great escapist and Matatron "Heaven's powers always spill over (to the humans)" and "Who's it gonna be, Castiel, her or YOUR family (human family)?"

S8 Sam - Great big Sam nervous breakdown; totally paralyzed and running away. Even Amelia-Sam was part OF the freakout, something Amelia's father, someone that knew her well and cared about her, recognized (Amelia doesn't wanna go back to her husband, because he can *die* and maybe she's like Sam too in that she's completely allergic to grief, hey?); Sam oscillates between CHECKOUT OF REALITY and WE GOTTA STICK TO THE HUNTING CODE(TM) the same way Dean clung to the simpler hunting code at the beginning of s7; "Don't choke!" Both boys veer between all-or-nothing with regards to the hunting life

S9 Dean - Gadreel and Kevin and feeling like he was doing the wrong thing; Sam's willingness to commit suicide; Cas's symbolic suicide, then Cas falling — we see in his speech to Metatron that he was desperate to also "Put a Stop to It--to All of It" and his reasons were spelled out clearly, protecting Sam and the distress over Cas's grace/falling/being wronged BY Metatron

S10 Sam - Reacting to Dean's death AGAIN; Reacting to the terrible knowledge that everyone was always sacrificing for him and not the other way around; also a delayed grief reaction to how his family locked him up for detox; and of being an addict himself and fearing that it would end in black eyes and blood (he's not exactly wrong, either; he just went too far)

S10 Cas - Delayed reaction to Jimmy Novak's passing; meeting Claire and wanting to be "like a human"; his guilt was so overpowering; also dealing with his hypocrisy (re: Metatron) about wanting to stay on the earth

S10 Dean - Loss of free will redux, but in the disinhibited direction; dealing with feelings of shame over the loss of free will and past experiences where he also felt powerless or manipulated; he (like Claire Novak) overall tends to choose forgiveness, trying to understand and give grace to those who wronged him; also dealing with being Cole's "Azazel," the parallel to Claire dealing with her "Azazels"

S11 Cas - Delayed reaction to Dean dying in s9, reaction to his grace power reduction (he got his grace BACK and it was damaged), also feeling powerless to protect anyone; the attack dog spell etc etc; Sacrifices himself to the cause

S12 Mary - Huge breakdown because she was ripped from her life and is grieving her entire family as she knew it; feeling like she can't escape from hunting and she corrupted John and in reading his journal she empathizes with his plight while struggling with the cruelty of it; she decides if she can't escape then maybe she can "Put a Stop to It--to All of It."

S12 Cas - Still struggling with the deal/mortality of the human fam (First Blood) and his lack of strength, See Lily Sunder and Stuck in the Middle with You as crisis points. Was enticed by Jack keeping his power because that means he'd have a fam member who could outlive him. The script taps into Cas's wants: Kelly to be at peace, Sam to be free, Dean to be *ahem* thankful, and himself to be strong. Nephilim gives him a cause to not feel guilty about being on earth because it's a Mission (TM)

Nervous breakdowns, man. I can keep going. There are so many nervous breakdowns. SO MANY. And when you look at them AS nervous breakdowns, they make more sense.

[omalice]

Isn’t it cute? P.5

When you glance at the store's biggest teddy bear and “Isn’t it cute?” with a gorgeous smile.

Character: Asmodeus, Simeon, Solomon x GN! Reader

Note: My English is really poor, so…please go easy on me if I write something wrong!

P.1 | P.2 | P.3 | P.4

NB! Timeline for Asmodeus and Solomon

The “I will grant your wish somehow”

Asmodeus

“Isn’t it cute?” You mumble while locking your eyes on the store's biggest teddy bear.

“Awww” he pursed his lip together slightly to let out the long sound "Do you dig it? I have a doll that's around this size. It's yours if you want!"

“Eh– yes, I want,” you’re startlingly blinking your eyes. “But…I never knew before that you’re a doll’s fan”

“‘Cause I’m not!” He lets out a soft chuckle

"Hey, my doll has white wings, you know? I brought it with me when I first landed in Devildom. At those times, I really miss my old angel life, seeing the wings makes me feel like nothing's changed."

“Wait…” you instinctively reach out and firmly grasp his arm “Are you sure to give me the doll? It sounds so important to you…”

“It ‘used to’ important to me” he fix your words while gently stroking your hair.

"If having white wings means I haven't had a chance to meet you, then they're meaningless” “So, I don't need that doll anymore."

Simeon

“Isn’t it cute?” You mumble while locking your eyes on the store's biggest teddy bear.

"You want it?" His charming voice inquired in a questioning tone.

“Ah, I didn’t mean to—“ “Don’t worry, it’s alright” The angel waved his hand before beaming an affectionate grin at you.

“I think I can grant your wish somehow, it’s an angel duty after all”

After the talk, he led you to Purgatory Hall and baked you a pancake that exactly resembled a teddy bear from a store.

“Delicious?” The temporary chief asks while sporting a grin.

“Absolutely! Thanks so much, Simeon”

he let out a slight chuckle, "Even the store's teddy didn't have a good taste like this one, right?"

Solomon

“Isn’t it cute?” You mumble while locking your eyes on the store's biggest teddy bear.

“Want it?” Asked Solomon.

“Yes? …why are you asking? Mean to buy it for me?” You bafflingly reply,

“Well, I don't have that much money to do so," then, he shakes his head, and states, "But I think I can fulfill your wish," before bursting into a doubtful smile.

The following morning, Solomon knocks on your door to wake you up and welcome your morning with a huge teddy bear!

“T-Thanks?? But how?”

"You know what,” He replied to your confusion with a slow sigh, "I never expected Barbatos to have such fantastic sewing skill, it makes me honestly envy Diavolo for having an all arounder butler like him.”

“…..”

This week, Barbatos seems utterly frustrated, and you do your best to keep the teddy bear out of his sight.

It’s finally the last part! Thanks for the following. I have some headcanon plans to write, please look forward to it if you enjoy my writing stuff! ✨✨

[saint-starflicker]

5 Dark Academia Movies That I Don't Find Too Many Other People Posting Very Frequently About

Note my definition of Dark Academia: dark because somebody dies (at a stretch, the darkness can be oppression or abuse from which no one necessarily dies but it still gets pretty dark—or if someone attempts suicide or murder then I count it as dark); academia because they go to uniform school or prepster university (the academia part can be an intense study, discussion, or research of a subject even though they are not at a campus.)

1. The Moth Diaries 2011

The book was better, more detailed, but the movie is still pretty good. The campus is peak neoclassical splendor, the uniforms are on-point aesthetic, and the darkness is gruesomely bloody and also it's on fire. The book is set during the school year of 1970 to 1971, but the movie is set in 2010 thereabouts.

2. "O" 2001

A modern retelling of Othello by William Shakespeare set at a prestigious boarding school. Adapting classical literature in a high school was trendy at the time, trying to capture the magic of Clueless 1995, and in my opinion "O" was the most glammed-up production with the most dark academia atmosphere out of all of them.

3. Educating Rita 1983

A working-class British young woman takes a social enrichment outreach education opportunity to study literature, in hopes that a study in the humanities will give her a better sense of self. Her tutor is a "failed" poet who struggles with substance addiction. Unbeknownst to them, both their lives are at the crux of change. In their consistently non-romantic conversations together, they unpack class discrimination in academia and society, as well as argue about the meaningfulness versus empty pretensions of studying humanities.

Nobody dies, well all right somebody almost dies for pretentious academic reasons...but the conversations leave a lot between the lines.

4. Private Romeo 2011

A modern retelling of Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare set at an all-boys military school. Sure, it's not the Oxbridge-Camford or "Hollywood New England" collegiate aesthetic...but it is very gay, a feature that I hope lends the movie some compensatory merit in this context. Juliet's a boy. Romeo is still a boy. Nurse is a boy. Juliet's mom is a man. Paris is an abstract concept. They are studying Romeo and Juliet at the military school English class at the same time that they are living and speaking the lines in Romeo and Juliet, so it gets surreal and I recommend getting more into the emotion of it than get caught up in what the lines they're saying are supposed to mean.

This should be chaotic academia or frenzy academia, but there's homophobic hazing and bullying so I think that's pretty dark.

5. Bare: a Pop Opera ???? There was supposed to be a movie but I deduce that it's stalled in development purgatory. I have not liked a movie adaptation of a stage musical since Chicago 2002, so I guess I don't really like movie adaptations of stage musicals—but I definitely want my current hyperfixation to be more accessible than a Spotify album oh hey while waiting for this adaptation to happen you can listen to the Spotify album. It's an operetta, so it's sung-through and you won't miss out on any story dialogue unlike with other musicals. Here's my argument for B:APO being Dark Academia.

DUE TO THE FACT THAT THE #5 SPOT ON MY LIST DOES NOT EXIST...WHAT DARK ACADEMIA MOVIES DO YOU THINK SHOULD BE IN THIS SPOT IN THE MEANTIME?

I CAPSLOCK IN ANGUISH THAT THE B:APO MOVIE DOES NOT EXIST YET AND PROBABLY NEVER WILL.

YOUR RECOMMENDATIONS ARE CONSOLATION.

Honorable Mentions:

The History Boys 2006 had one subplot I was bothered by at first and then grew to despise which is really too bad because this movie had racial diversity, directly addressed misogyny in academia, and had canon gays in a love triangle — but it is dark and it doesn't really seem to know that it's dark.

The Children's Hour 1961 "dark academia is mlm while cottagecore is wlw" WRONG watching this movie to consider evidence of dark academia wlw is part of your yuri duty! remember our history!

Never Let Me Go 2010 I can't describe objectively because I read the book at a time in my life that I was having a time at that time. The movie is a faithful adaptation. I re-read it recently and I think it's more Dark Academia than I gave it credit for, but if you're not into Contemplative Dystopia then I completely understand it not being your thing.

Like Minds 2006 — Huh, so 2006 was a busy year for this genre that did not yet exist at the time. Witness the folie à deux of 21st century teenaged Templar Knight kinnies who are also homoerotic serial killers. (Waves to the people that introduced me to this movie, who—contrary to the header of this post—actually do post about it.)

Rope 1948 does have some activity that I've caught recently enough, but I thought maybe it wouldn't be considered Dark Academia right away because it doesn't take place at a school. It takes place at a dinner party where ex-schoolfriends talk to their philosophy professor who they remain well-acquainted with after graduation, an interrogation of putting this professor's morally heinous philosophy into practice. Also there is a corpse at this dinner party. There's your academics and your darkness, so there's your dark academia.

[ichiwashername-o]

What Are Friends For Ch. 24

An Undertale fanfiction.

Written by ichiwashername-o

Summary: The skeleton brothers begin to construct their time machine! But, of course, time traveling is very rarely a simple endeavor . . .

Rating: Viewer discretion advised.  Contains swearing, trauma, and psychological horror

Cast: Undyne, Papyrus, Sans, W.D. Gaster, Grillby and others

WE'RE BACK, BABYYYYY! And to kick it all off is a doozy of a chapter! I really hope you all enjoy!

[CH.1] [CH.2] [Ch.3] [CH.4] [CH.5] [CH.6] [CH.7] [CH.8] [CH. 9] [CH.10] [CH. 11] [CH.12] [CH. 13] [CH. 14] [CH.15] [CH.16] [CH. 17] [CH.18] [CH. 19] [CH. 20] [CH. 21] [CH. 22] [CH. 23] [CH. 24] [CH. 25]

AO3

With no time to waste, with neither brother wanting or needing sleep, the duo headed downstairs to the basement, a room Papyrus hadn’t personally entered for some time. It was much like how he remembered it; dusty, with parts and blueprints strewn all about, a massive blue tarp half-covering some sort of strange metallic contraption. And for the first time in a very long time, Sans stepped forward to tear it off.

A great cloud of dust billowed in the air as the tarp was removed, revealing an arc-shaped machine, half-constructed with metal plates torn off, exposing the wiring and skeletal structure underneath.

“The time machine?” Papyrus ventured.

Sans gave a lazy half-shrug. “Was supposed to be. All the math checked out ok, but theory and practice are two different beasts. Could never get it to work right, and never figured out how. I suspect the human kid had something to do with it. Interference, or something.”

Papyrus gave a cautious nod. He was vaguely aware the human has— had —some strange influence over time. “But now the human is . . . not here anymore—”

“No more interference. So, maybe it’ll work this time,” Sans finished. Hey, it was the best they got. Anything was worth a shot if it meant they kept Gaster well and out of their lives. Let him rot in whatever purgatory he found himself in. 

Bastard deserved a lot worse.

“Let’s get started.”

Sans dug through the drawers, stuffed with an encyclopedia’s worth of blueprints and schematics. Initially, Sans was tentative about showing all this to Papyrus. This was complicated stuff, and the last thing he needed was to confuse his poor brother. But, to his delighted surprise, Papyrus took to the blueprints like a fish to water. It seemed all of Papyrus’s extensive knowledge of fabricating his own convoluted traps proved to give him exactly the experience he needed to read the blueprints. He had quite the mechanical eye, Sans would learn.

It really was impressive how quickly Papyrus picked up on things. With something to do, something for him to physically work on, Papyrus dove in with vigor and enthusiasm Sans hadn’t seen in him for a long time, not since the kid, that was for sure.

“Could you hand me that crescent wrench?”

“Sure thing, just pass me the terminal plates while you’re over there—"

“You want 12-gauge or 9-gauge wire for this?”

“Well, our current voltage is going off 240, and depending on the load, I say we err on the side of caution and go bigger—”

“-Green to ground, white to neutral, red to hot—could you hand me that black wire, this motor is three-phase, oh, we might have to change out the fuses, those aren’t nearly big enough—”

The hours flew by, both skeleton brothers working in tandem, getting their bones and clothes covered in dust and grease and wire shavings. And it was . . . fun . Sans had no idea how much fun it could be building something with his brother. Why hadn’t they done this before? The two of them had their fair share of joint projects, but either Sans’ slacking off made the end result a joke, or Papyrus’s endless ambition and enthusiasm caused it to blow up in a spectacular fireball before the final piece was finished.

To be fair, they were very spectacular fireballs.

But now, with the two of them working with synchronized fervor and purpose, they were making more progress than either of them could ever dream of.

Which proved to be to their detriment, they would find. So engrossed in their work, so captivated by a tangible mission and something to throw all their energy into, they . . . might have lost track of the time. And only were reminded of petty things like eating and sleeping when Papyrus stood a little too fast and nearly fainted.

Sans caught him before he could crack his head on a table. “Alright, um, I think we need to put a pin in this And I ain’t talking about the pins and needles in my legs from kneeling so long,” he chuckled.

“Clearly, we do need a break,” Papyrus noted sourly. “Because your jokes are becoming truly insufferable.”

Retreating up from the basement, they made their way to the kitchen where Papyrus began to pull out various food bits from the pantry in an attempt to cobble together some sort of breakfast—actually, what time was it? Papyrus glanced at the clock and his eyes widened. Ah, not breakfast, he decided. More like a dinner. A very, very, very late dinner.

How the time flies.

And how he hoped they’d make time fly at their own discretion when they were through, he thought wryly.

Soon enough, Papyrus, with Sans’ help, (or interference, depending on how you looked at it) he had made a nice dinner of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast. So, he did end up making breakfast. But only because he hadn’t gone shopping in a long time and they were starting to run out of food! That was next on the list! Going to the store!

As they ate, they continued to talk about their project and how the time machine was coming along. Progress was going smoothly. If they kept up this pace, it’d be done by the end of the week.

“The hardware’s not the issue, though,” Sans said, jabbing the air with a fork. “It’s the programming. If you think plotting out a series of coordinates in 3D space is tricky, try doing it with another dimension mixed in there.”

Papyrus stuttered for a response. Yes, he was more than capable of handling the mechanical side of their little project, but the mathematical side? Not as much. “Well! Surely you have a good idea of how to do it! Or at least, where to start.”

“I do, but it’ll take a while,” Sans shrugged. He speared a rather crispy piece of bacon where it crumbled under his fork. Shrugging again, he squirted a dollop of ketchup over it and nibbled up the pieces. Papyrus gagged.

“Seriously, how on earth did I end up with such a defunct brother,” he sighed, shaking his head

Sans snickered. “I’m gonna swing by Alphys’s lab tomorrow and run the numbers by her and see what she thinks. She has a great eye for this sort of complex stuff.”

“Good idea! I need to go grocery shopping and refill our pantry! And then we can have a proper dinner!”

“Why, what’s wrong with eggs and bacon? It’s a classic,” Sans says as he takes another bite of a ketchup-slathered slice of bacon.

“But that’s breakfast food, and we’re having dinner!”

“Huh, funny, because we’re eating it for dinner, thus making it a dinner food.”

“UGH! Sans! You know what I mean!”

“I defy your conventional food standards and declare myself a culinary rebel.”

“Not as long as I’m the one in the kitchen, mister!”

“Ah, then I better go get my own.”

“Maybe you should! Then you can commit all the sacrilege against your daily sustenance that you wish!”

They shared a laugh, and in that moment, it was like their life was right back to normal. No longer did shame and guilt haunt Papyrus, and no longer was Sans writhed with fury and indignation. Determination filled them both. Determination to set things right. And knowing his brother as well as he did, Sans had all the confidence in the world that it will be done.

The brothers departed their home, both traveling on the boat together to Hotlands, further discussing construction plans and Sans waxing theories too complex for Papyrus to understand. But the younger brother didn’t mind in the least; he was more than happy to be someone Sans could think to out loud. Stepping off the boat, they split off, Papyrus running to the store and Sans veering towards the Hotland labs. 

He knocked on the door, but there was no immediate response. He knocked again, and veering on the side of caution, he also opened up his phone and shot the good doctor Alphys a text.

Hey, you around? I wanna run some numbers by you, he wrote.

He didn’t get a response back to his text, but the doors did crack open, revealing the little yellow lizard. Alphys had certainly seen better days. Her eyes were lined with dark circles, her scales were dull, her clothes absolutely filthy. But there was a brief spark of life in her eyes behind those dusty scratched spectacles that lit up when she saw Sans.

“S-S-Sans! W-What a surprise!” she said, her voice quiet and scratchy. Sounded like she had a sore throat. “I w-w-wasn’t expecting you.”

“I wasn’t expecting me, either,” he joked. “You got a moment? I’d like your input on something.”

“O-Oh, do you? I’m n-n-not sure what input I’d even give you–”

“You don’t even know what I’m working on yet,” he said gently. “C’mon, ain't you a little bit curious? I can promise ya, it’s real juicy.”

Alphys’s lips twitched in what Sans assumed–-or at least, hoped-–was a smile. “O-Okay, b-but p-p-please don’t be mad, the l-l-lab’s a total disaster.”

“Why would I judge? It probably looks exactly like mine,” Sans said, earning an actual laugh from the doctor. He stepped inside, casting a brief look around the lab. Honestly, it wasn’t that much worse than the last time he was here to look at the camera footage of the fight. Maybe the garbage pile was a little taller and more instant ramen cups were scattered about. 

Alphys cleared a small space on her desk, swiping away reports and food wrappers alike off into the overflowing trash can. On the trash was a small sticky note that simply said, “Me.” Sans frowned.

“S-so, what are you w-working on?” she asked. She tapped her claws together nervously.

“Paps and I are building a time machine,” he said simply. He produced a folder, opening it up and showing off all his blueprints and notes.

Immediately, Alphys’s interest was piqued and she leaned forward, adjusting her glasses. She picked through the papers, reading them over eagerly.

“Y-you are?!” she said, the excitement in her voice palpable. Sans shrugged, his grin growing. He figured this was just the thing to break through poor Alphys’ stupor. “B-but I thought you totally gave up on this project–”

“I did, because the human kept interfering with it,” Sans said. “But now with the human gone . . .”

Alphys deflated. “Y-yeah, that’s a good point.” She chattered, her entire body shivering as her stuttering grew worse. “But there’s–there’s s-s-still s-someone else wh-who can control the t-t-timeline . . .”

Sans paused. “Flowey.”

Alphys nodded.

Well. Shit. In all the excitement, he completely forgot that one tiny little hiccup.

Sans tried to hide his frustration, but it was hard not to be discouraged. He was so sure this would work, only to find out that–once again–his plans and work all amounted to nothing.

“Ah. Well, in that case, I better get out of your scales,” Sans said, taking the folder out of Alphys’s reluctant hands. “Sorry to bother you.”

He turned to leave. Now how in the world was he going to break the news to Papyrus–

“Wait.”

Sans paused. He turned around. Alphys was still hunched over, but from her frown and the way one claw was raised to her lips in deep thought, he could see the gears churning rapidly in her head.

“W-what if . . . what if Flowey was . . . willing to help us?”

Sans stared. “And why in the world would that little weed wanna help us ?”

“Because he’s bored !” Alphys said. “H-h-he was talking to me recently, a-a-after he m-m-made me–”

“What,” Sans asked sharply. “What did Flowey make you do?”

“It’s not important,” Alphys dismissed. Sans knew better than to push her. “But what is important is that he was telling me how bored he was now! He told me how much he hated how things worked out! Nothing’s fun for him anymore!” Despite what she was insinuating of the little flower’s psychotic behavior, she was smiling. She looked genuinely excited. 

“I-If we told him we were w-working on something to fix the timeline, I think he’d help out!” she went on. “N-Not because he’d want to help us, o-of course, but because the one thing Flowey hates more than anything is being bored. And this timeline is really, really boring for him!”

Sans hated to admit it, but Alphys had a point. He remembered all of Flowey’s rants and taunts about how much he liked to play with them. How much fun he was having torturing them. And he recalled very distinctly how furious Flowey was when the fun had run out for the little beast.

“Well, that’s an idea,” Sans said slowly. “But it’ll be hard to convince him. He can be pretty stubborn and egotistical. Maybe if we make it seem like his idea instead of us asking him directly–”

“L-Leave it to me,” Alphys said, smiling for the first time in what felt like forever. “B-Being s-stuck with him for so long, I know how he thinks.”

“Just be careful,” Sans warned. “And if he does anything to hurt you–”

“D-Don’t worry about me, he w-won’t hurt me,” Alphys said. Her voice lowered. “He . . . he enjoys playing with me t-t-too m-m-much to hurt me too badly.”

Sans stiffened. 

“I got this!” Alphys added in a rush, putting out her hands. “J-Just trust me! P-Please?”

Sans let out a reluctant sigh. “You got my number handy. Just promise to call me if he does anything funny . Cuz that’s my job.”

“Promise,” Alphys swore, drawing an x-shape over her chest. “O-Oh, and Sans? I ran your calculations through my head.” Once again, her eyes sparkled. 

“It’s going to work!”

–---

“Let’s see here–spaghetti noodles–always an essential–and sauce, and bread to make Sans’ favorite sandwiches, and milk ! Don’t forget the milk!”

Papyrus cruised up and down the isles of the massive general store, appropriately called The General Store, loading his shopping cart with food. If they wanted to build the time machine, they needed plenty of energy! And for that , they needed food to make plenty of tasty meals!

As he shopped, he hummed a little tune to himself, not paying too much mind to the surrounding shoppers. If he was, he might notice them giving him a wide berth, which just made shopping that much easier since he wouldn’t have to snake the big bulky car through the throngs of fellow patrons!

The humming also drowned out the whispers and the mutterings. All for the better. 

As he proceeded to the check-out, he was surprised to see a familiar blue flash of scales and crimson hair. He brightened, waving over at Undyne. Undyne caught sight of him, jerking in surprise herself, before she smiled and hurried over.

“Hey, Paps, whatcha doing?” she asked gently. She hadn’t seen him since the funeral for all the Snowdin residents and sentries, but he looked so much cheerier . Which was a very good thing!

“What does it look like? Shopping, obviously!” Papyrus said, gesturing to the cart of food. “Our food stores grew dangerously low, so I thought it most prudent to restock!” He glanced at the basket in Undyne’s hand. “I’m assuming you’re doing much the same?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, I was running low on tea and seaweed,” she said, hefting the basket stuffed so full it was a miracle nothing was spilling out and over. Or that Undyne could carry it all effortlessly in one hand. “Um, you look . . . good.”

“I am, and I’m feeling much better, too!” Papyrus said. He leaned forward and whispered in a voice that was only barely quieter than his usual bombastic voice–

He was speaking loud again!

“Sans and I are building a time machine!” Papyrus said excitedly, barely able to contain his own excitement. “Isn’t it great?! We’re going to go back in time and fix everything!”

Undyne stared. Now, she had seen plenty of animes with time travel shenanigans, and it always seemed to go . . . poorly . To say nothing if it was even possible.

“Oh, is that so?” she asked, trying to gauge if this was some sort of ruse. But no, Papyrus looked completely serious.

“Indeed! My brother is visiting Alphys as we speak! He’s running the calculations by her to make sure everything’s up to snuff! We’ve already got the machine built in our basement!”

Oh. Oh, wow, they were serious .

“That’s–that’s great, Papyrus,” Undyne said, but her head was reeling. Darn it, she didn’t have the head for all this complicated science crap! She knew Sans was smarter than he let on, but smart enough to build a time machine?!

“Hey, you know what? I haven’t visited Alphys in a bit myself. Let’s swing by and say hi!” she suggested. She needed to see all this for herself. It was too crazy to believe! Time travel, of all things!

“Okie-dokie!”

Papyrus quickly paid for his groceries, loading himself up to the elbows with bags. Undyne helped. They made their way over to the labs, which wasn’t too far of a jaunt from The General Store. With their arms so full of groceries, they didn’t have anything free to knock, but the door was slightly ajar, so they let themselves in, figuring Alphys and Sans were just inside.

“Hey, Al! Sorry for barging in, we just wanted to say hi–!” Undyne shouted, but her voice stopped cold when she saw the lab was a wreck . It was more than the usual mess of papers and food wrappers and trash; furniture was toppled over and computers smashed. Vines snaked their way out of cracks in the floor and walls.

Both she and Papyrus dropped the groceries. They only shared one brief and horrified look before they took off, scouring the labs.

“ALPHYS?! ALPHYS!!!” Undyne shouted madly, panic and anger rising up in her soul. If anyone hurt a single scale on her girlfriend’s head, she’d destroy them!!!

They rounded a corner, getting a brief peek of more carnage before Papyrus grabbed Undyne’s arm firmly and pulled her back. He placed a finger at his mouth, signaling her to keep quiet. They both leaned around the corner together.

Beyond, in a room, similarly destroyed, with vines coating nearly every inch of wall and floor, was Alphys, wrapped up in thorny vines as a little yellow flower scowled viciously down at her.

Teeth grinding together, Undyne summoned a spear. She was going to KILL that thing–!

“ Wait ,” Papyrus urged, pulling her back again. 

“What– why ?! That stupid weed is hurting her!” Undyne seethed.

But Papyrus held firm, simply gesturing to hold back to watch and listen. The scientist and the flower, not noticing their presence, continued to talk.

“And you just thought you could sneak around like this, behind my back, and I wouldn’t know?!” Flowey was saying. 

“I w-w-wasn’t trying to t-t-trick you,” Alphys insisted. Though she was shaking and completely trapped, she didn’t look . . . scared . In fact, she looked quite focused and composed. This was enough to get Undyne to pause, much to her regret. “I’m j-j-j-just the m-messenger.”

“So that sneaky little trash bag thinks he’s so clever, doesn’t he?! Bet he thinks he’s even smarter and more clever than me, huh?”

“W-w-well, he is very s-smart,” Alphys said, shrugging as much as her vine prison allowed. 

“Enough! No more smart retorts from you! Tell me! What’s that trash bag up to?!”

“M-m-me? Or him?”

“DON’T PLAY STUPID WITH ME!” Flowey roared, and the vines tightened around Alphys, making her wince.

That was it. Undyne didn’t know what was going on, but she wasn’t going to let this stupid flower hurt her friend! 

She stepped around the corner, and she saw Alphys’s gaze flicker over to her. And she swore she saw Alphys mouth “No.”

No?! No what ?! No to saving her from this monster?!

But Alphys turned right back to Flowey, acting like Undyne wasn’t even there. “S-Sans is working on something. A big machine. He sh-showed me some notes . . .”

Undyne felt her phone buzz with an incoming message. Instinct told her to answer it. She pulled it out of her pocket, hardly tearing her gaze away from the scene in front of her.

It was from Alphys. It simply read, Don’t.

Undyne didn’t understand. What was Alphys doing?! She looked harder, and between the layers of vines, she could see the glow of a cell phone clutched in Alphys’s hand. Her thumb moved as she typed, all while keeping her attention focused solely on Flowey.

“It-it looked like . . . like . . .” she stuttered.

“Like what ?!” Flowey demanded.

Another text from Alphys. I got this.

“A time machine.”

Trust me.

Flowey paused. “A time machine?! Really? HA! That proves it! That trash bag is as stupid as ever!” He puffed up smugly.

Undyne deflated. That proved it, didn’t it? Time travel just wasn’t possible–

“No one can control the timeline but ME!!!”

Wait, what?! Undyne thought.

Alphys’s eyes widened in horrible realization. But it looked . . . forced? “W-what?! Oh no! That’s t-t-true! H-How could I have forgotten?”

“That’s right, my scaly little friend!” Flowey cackled manically. “You of all people should know the extent of my power! Silly little scientist! My DETERMINATION won’t allow just anyone to mess with my SAVE!”

“W-Well, I guess it’s not much of a loss,” Alphys sighed sadly. “Not much of a SAVE, if you ask me . . .”

Flowey froze. His smile slowly turned from gleeful to enraged.

“Would you like to repeat that?” Flowey hissed, dragging Alphys close. Alphys, despite herself, couldn’t help but squirm.

“I-I-I’m just s-s-saying what you said!” she pleaded. “W-Weren’t you the one who was s-s-saying how you weren’t having fun anymore?”

Flowey paused, grumbling, growling to himself. “Well, it’s pointless anyway! I can’t go back past the stupid human’s death!”

“Not unless you had some help , maybe . . .”

“I don’t need anyone’s help! And certainly not the help of that dumb trash bag!” Flowey protested fiercely. 

“Right, of course, of course,” Alphys backpedaled quickly. She then sighed again. “I guess that means we’re stuck in this boring, dull, not-fun timeline. Forever.”

Flowey scowled, barely able to speak.

“Yeah, yeah ! That’s right! You’re all stuck here! With me ! Because no one has control of the timeline but me ! SO DON’T YOU DUMB SCIENTISTS EVER FORGET THAT!!!”

And then, Flowey was gone. The vines slithered back through the walls and floor, dropping Alphys on the ground as Flowey slinked away.

“Alphys!” Undyne raced up to the scientist, pulling her to her feet and looking her over. Papyrus joined her, coming out of his hiding place. “Are you ok?!”

Alphys, despite the terrifying encounter, was smiling, looking quite pleased with herself. “Y-Yeah! I’m fine! I’m ok! I w-wasn’t expecting you! What are you two doing here?”

“Checking in on you, ya big nerd!” Undyne said, breathing a sigh of relief. Alphys was unharmed, thank the Angel above. “Are you going to tell me what all that was about?”

“W-Well, long story short, Sans is building a time machine,” Alphys said. She looked at Papyrus. “You told her, right?”

“I did! But I am not sure how Flowey found out! Or why was he so angry!”

“Oh, th-that was me!” Alphys explained.

“WHAT?! WHY?!” Undyne cried. “Flowey’s crazy evil, why would you tell him?!”

“Undyne, it’s ok! It was all part of my p-plan!” Alphys explained quickly. She adjusted her glasses, which now had a hairline crack through them. “Sans and I figured out that the time machine won’t work because Flowey’s power wouldn’t allow it to work; he would override the machine Sans is building.”

Undyne stared back and forth between Alphys and Papyrus. “Wait, are you actually telling me time travel is real ?”

“In a sense. But it’s very situational, and only beings with incredibly high Determination can do it,” Alphys said. “Beings like Flowey and the human.”

Papyrus smacked his forehead. “Oh, of course! How could I forget that?!”

“To be fair, Sans forgot, too,” Alphys giggled. “And if we want the time machine to work, we figured we needed Flowey’s help. B-But, of course, Flowey being . . . who he is, we couldn’t just ask him for help.”

“So, you set this up?” Undyne asked.

“This was all a most clever ruse into tricking Flowey to help us!” Papyrus said, putting together the pieces. “Well done, that was incredibly clever of you, indeed!” 

Alphys blushed.

“And incredibly stupid . He could have hurt you!” Undyne protested.

“I k-know, but it was a risk I had to take,” Alphys said. “A-And besides, I think I know Flowey well enough to know he wouldn’t do anything too terrible to me. I-it would mean one less friend for him to p-play with.” She laughed, but she couldn’t suppress a shudder.

Undyne got down on one knee and wrapped Alphys up in a tight hug. “Alphys that was . . . so brave of you. But you shouldn’t have done something so dangerous without telling us!”

“I knew what I was doing. I had everything under control!” Alphys assured. “Besides . . .” 

She pulled out her phone, pressing a button on it. Two things activated at once: first, a magical bubble barrier popped around Alphys, shielding her from harm, and secondly, machines in the room they had just been standing in began to activate. Out of the wall panels, gears and pistons whirred to life, revealing a mess of pipes that extended from concealed holes in the walls from every angle. The pipes sputtered to life, belching out a torrent of roaring flames that engulfed the room.

Alphys grinned. “I had a back-up plan.”

Undyne stared at the booby-trapped flamethrower room, lips slowly pulling back into a delighted smile. “Alphys, you are the coolest person ever.”

Alphys beamed.

–--

Sans didn’t have to wait long.

In fact, he was barely back in his basement, setting aside his notes, when a most unwelcome visitor barged in, springing up on Sans and wrapping him up in vines.

Sans sighed sarcastically. “Hey there, Buddy. But, I thought you knew better by now to try this trick on me,” he said as he seamlessly teleported out of the vines, standing right back on the floor. 

He stared up at the mess of tangled thorny vines that had inexplicably grown in the corner of his basement lab, and front and center was Flowey himself, grinning sinisterly. But Sans also knew  Flowey fairly well, and he could see the flower’s frustration and anger behind the mask of sadism. 

“It’s still fun to remind you how easily I could crush you to dust!” Flowey sneered. “And besides, it’s been a while since I popped in on my faaavorite trash bag.” A vine extended and poked the machine. “And lookee here! Someone’s been busy.”

“Just a little pet project of mine,” Sans shrugged. 

“Don’t pretend I’m stupid!” Flowey scowled. “Oh, I already visited your bestest friend, Alphys, and she squealed allll about your secret project! I know what you’re working on!” He closed in, his grin growing. “And I can tell you, it’s not going to work! I won’t let it!”

Sans allowed his smile to fade. But from his point of view, his and Alphys’s plan was going perfectly. 

“You forget, little trash bag, that as long as I’m around, I’m the only one with the power to SAVE! I can decide when we get to keep going, or if we get to start alllll over from the beginning–”

“Well, not the very beginning,” Sans interjected unhelpfully.

Flowey’s voice cut out, spitting in frustration.

“As powerful as you may be, you’re not as powerful as that kid. There’s only so far back you can go,” Sans reminded him, trying to suppress his own satisfied grin.

“Well, you know what?! NEITHER CAN YOU! Not with this dumpy, stupid hunk of metal!” Flowey protested, smacking a vine against the machine.

“Still doesn’t change the fact. I think we’re both getting fed up with how current events played out, aren’t we?”” Sans pressed, shrugging casually. “It would be real nice if we could go back and prevent any of this from happening.”

“Yeah, well, we can’t ,” Flowey fumed.

“Not with that attitude we can’t.”

Flowey paused, turning to Sans very slowly. Sans could practically see the flower swallowing his massive pride to maybe, maybe humor the idea that it might be beneficial to actually work with him. Just this once.

“Keep talking,” Flowey hissed.

Sans stepped up to the machine, tapping where Flowey smacked it with a vine. There was a scratch, but it was superficial. “This time machine replicates the power of Determination. And we know from past experience that Determination is a multiplicative power��”

“Use English!”

“It means, if you use your power in tandem with this machine, your power multiplies significantly. You’ll be way more powerful than you are now.”

“Powerful enough to override that brat’s SAVE?” Flowey ventured hopefully.

“It just might.”

Flowey chewed it over. It was true, he hated being stuck in this timeline more than anything. It got boring so quickly seeing Papyrus mope about and cry. He wanted Chara–-Frisk, whoever back again so they could keep playing together.

But he couldn’t let Sans know he was actually contemplating this. “Or I can just take this machine for myself, harness its power, and take over the WHOLE Underground! With that sort of power, I can easily defeat Asgore, take his soul, and take the rest of the human souls he has hidden away!” he cackled gleefully. 

“Great plan, but unfortunately it doesn’t work like that,” Sans said casually.

“What?”

“It’s a lot of science-y mumbo-jumbo, but the crux of it is that this machine only works on the time travel part of your Determination. Effectively just enhancing your ability to SAVE.”

Flowey blinked, confused. “That doesn’t make any sense!”

“Yeah, like I said, it's a lot of complicated science. You try to do anything outside of travel around the time stream, it won’t work. Sorry.”

Flowey scowled. “You could be lying to me.”

“I could be.”

They stared each other down, but Sans’ expression was the completely unreadable mask it always was. Finally, with a defeated huff of frustration, Flowey relented.

“Fine! FINE ! I’ll do it! But it’s not because I want to help you! In fact, first thing I’m gonna do when I bring back that brat is torture your brother even MORE! I’ll find even more sick, twisted ways for you and your brother to go feral! I’ll make you go on a feral killing spree! I’m gonna make you kill the WHOLE Underground! Hee hee hee hee!”

Sure, you do that,” Sans said calmly. He wasn’t concerned in the least. He knew a bluff when he saw one.

“I will!” Flowey declared triumphantly. “Now just tell me what I have to do to get this hunk of junk working!”

“Well, first, we need my brother here.” 

“Fine, fine.”

“And then we need to activate the machine, and when the machine powers on, I go through and–”

“You’re not going anywhere!” Flowey protested furiously. “I will be the one to go back in time! I will kill your rampaging brother! And the human brat for good measure!”

“Sorry, you can’t.”

“WHY NOT?!”

“You can’t exactly time travel if you’re the one powering the machine, can you?”

Flowey dissolved into a furious sputtering fit of rage.  “That–that’s so unfair!!!”

“Sorry, it’s just the way it works.”

Flowey sputtered more barely comprehensible obscenities. “ARGH! This isn’t fair! This sucks! YOU suck!”

“Sorry.”

“NO, YOU’RE NOT!” Flowey continued to rage. But his desire to go back trumped all else. “UGH! FINE ! I’ll do it! But if you’re tricking me in any way, I’m going to make you and your brother suffer! As well as Alphys!”

“That’s fair.”

Flowey stood there, fuming. And with that settled, Sans made some phone calls, and within a few minutes, Papyrus was back home, dropping off his groceries in the kitchen before heading downstairs. With him was Alphys and Undyne. Undyne glared at Flowey. Flowey stuck his tongue back at her, and Alphys desperately avoided eye contact with anyone.

“So, we’re all filled in on what’s going on?” Sans asked. “With Flowey’s most generous assistance–” Flowey grunted. “--we’re going to power on the time machine, go back in time, and stop the human from falling to the Gaster Blaster beast.”

There was a nod amongst everyone, all looking grim and determined. Save Flowey, who continued to pout. 

“Our priority is making sure the human soul isn’t destroyed,” Sans went on. “So that means preventing the Gaster Blaster from fighting the human. Our optimal option is to prevent Undyne from turning Papyrus in the first place.”

Undyne squirmed uncomfortably. 

“If that doesn’t work, we need to take out the human.”

“Or take out Papyrus,” Flowey said with a cruel grin. “Killing either of them prevents all this mess, doesn’t it?”

Sans frowned, not immediately responding. As correct as Flowey was, he wasn’t going to just suggest killing his own brother!

“Aww, what’s the big deal? He’ll just come back. If everything goes to plan, that is,” Flowey continued to taunt.

“We’ll play it by ear,” Sans dismissed. “You just focus on keeping the timeline open and sending us back.” 

Flowey just swayed back and forth, grinning unsettlingly.

“Alphys, stay here and keep an eye on things. Papyrus, you too. Undyne–” he paused, settling his eyes on her. “You come with me.”

Undyne jumped. “Wait, you want me to come back in time with you?!”

“You’re pretty tough. If we need to fight the human, I’m gonna need your help,” he explained.

Undyne understood. Papyrus was strong, but his fighting spirit was completely shattered. If they needed to fight–and based on the unsettling feeling she was getting in her gut, that was very likely–Sans needed a fierce and determined warrior at his side. And knowing what the human would do to Papyrus, what that human subjected them all to, Undyne would find no qualm in her conscience about putting that human into the ground.

“Alright, everyone, let’s begin.”

Everyone got to their stations. Alphys stood at the controls, typing up the commands to power it up. Flowey wrapped his vines around the machine, sinking into the cracks to get at the “meat” of the electronics so he could feed his own power into it. Papyrus stood back, offering his assistance where he could. And Sans and Undyne stood before the gate, ready for anything.

“Powering on!” Alphys called out. 

The machine whirred on, lights blinking on, electricity humming. At the same time, Flowey’s own magic pulsed, flooding his Determination into it. The roar of motors grew louder and louder until it was a constant thunderous rumble. Sparks ignited within the circular gate, the sparks coming faster and faster until lightning arched at a constant flow. And with a sudden crash, the sparks split across the gate, creating a vortex of light. The light became a cyclone, a fierce wind whipping up and pulling them towards the vortex. Sans planted his feet, bracing himself against the wind.

Beyond him was a swirling kaleidoscope of colors and shapes. It played tricks on his mind, blinking away the stars that were flashing in his eyes as he struggled to comprehend what he was even seeing. But he knew this was it. The time machine was powered on. It was working .

“Readings are stable!” Alphys cried out over the deafening noise. “GO!”

Giving one last nod to Papyrus, Sans jumped in, followed closely by Undyne. They stepped into the vortex, and suddenly, they were pulled and stretched and thrown about, two tiny insignificant beings battered in the incomprehensible stream that was time itself. Beyond flashing lights that blinded them and shapes that defied definition, they saw images. Fragments of moments in time as they were buffeted about. Some they experienced themselves, some experienced by others, and some they couldn’t tell when they happened, or if they happened at all.

And strangest of all was the overwhelming feeling of a presence with them. Sans felt a hand grab his hood, and he turned to see Undyne clutching onto him fiercely, her eyes wide with awe as she struggled to take all of this in.

Having fun? A familiar voice called out.

“Flowey?!” Undyne scowled. “Where the heck are you?!”

“All around us,” Sans reminded her grimly. “This is his SAVE. We’re flowing through his timeline.”

Hee hee! Perhaps we should make some little detours!

“Not now, you punk! Just take us where we need to go!” Undyne cried out. But her protests were ignored as a memory played in front of them. It was the day Papyrus woke up from his extensive sleep after the human died, where he found out . . . what he did.

Helpless, they could only watch as Papyrus broke out in tears, crying in sheer anguish–

“This is old, Flowey,” Undyne growled. “Could we all just get this over with already?”

But don’t you feel just terrible about what you did to your very best friend? I mean how could you do something so hideously awful to him?

“No shit , Sherlock, why do you think I’m here right now?!”

Flowey scowled, clearly discouraged by Undyne’s lack of a reaction. Well, how about you, trash bag? Shall we relive some savory moments for you?

“Sure, it’s not like I can stop you,” he shrugged passively.

Huh? Flowey said, stunned. There was a brief pause and a stutter as Flowey found his voice. Ha! That’s right! You can’t stop me! I can do whatever I want! Show you whatever horrible memories I choose!

And he did just that. He showed the two of them the worst memories he could think of, from Papyrus’s anguish to the way the townsfolk spoke of him with fear and revulsion. He showed them how miserable Papyrus was, lamenting in his grave sin. 

Through it all, San did not react, and following his lead, neither did Undyne. They couldn’t give Flowey that satisfaction. They couldn’t let him know he was getting to them.

Clearly frustrated by this, Flowey tried harder. And with a wicked burst of inspiration, he dug up the memory of him in the lab with Alphys, forcing the scientist to watch the video of the bloody carnage over and over and over again, punishing her if she dared to look away and laughing cruelly at her sobs.

Undyne stiffened, rage billowing in her chest. That horrible little thing! She wanted to lash out and hurt him for daring to torment her friend, but Sans was there, gripping her hand tightly. He gave her a subtle shake No.

Don’t give him the satisfaction.

Undyne swallowed the hot lump of rage in her throat. And she scoffed.

“Yeah, like I care.”

The images paused and then slowly began to fade away. 

You two are so boring!

“Just take us to where we wanna go,” Sans said.

Reluctantly, and with much belly-aching, the timeline swirled around them, bringing them further and further back. They could almost sense approaching the fated event–

Undyne screamed in shock as she was suddenly slammed against some invisible wall. Her reflexes kicked in and she hugged Sans close to her chest, preventing him from striking that wall. But still the billowing force of the timeline bore down on her, pinning her to that “wall,” like being trapped against a drain under a tumultuous downpour of water. She could barely move. And worse of all, she felt a static energy burn all along her back as it was pressed against the barrier. It seared her skin, burned her flesh, setting her teeth on edge as she felt lightning course through her body.

“FLOWEY!” she screamed. “What are you doing?! MAKE IT STOP!”

We’re not there yet! He protested. It’s right there, it’s right there , we need to get there!

“There’s a wall!” Undyne cried. “There’s a wall! I can’t! It burns! IT BURNS!”

Stop your complaining, I can get it! I just need more–! More Determination! I need to get past that wall!

A foul acrid smell filled her nose. The burning turned to an ice-cold chill. The rest of her body still seared from the constant surge of lighting flowing through her. Her muscles clenched so hard she thought her teeth would crack.

“Sans!” she called out.

We’re almost there! We’re right there! Just hold on! This was your idea!

Sans saw the state Undyne was in, but beyond that, he saw the wall. It was made of an energy Sans knew all too well.

Determination. But not just anyone’s Determination.

The kid.

Even with all that extra power . . . it wasn’t enough.

I can get it! Just hold on!

Sans looked back to Undyne. She was barely hanging on. They didn’t have time to spare.

I–I–I can . . . ! Flowey protested. His voice cracked. I can’t! It’s not working!

“GET US OUT.”

And just like that, everything . . . stopped.

Undyne cracked open an eye. She was laying on the lab floor, Sans standing above her. Alphys and Papyrus rushed to her side, while Flowey was still wrapped up in the machine.

Papyrus was the first to come to her aid, looking worriedly at the burns all over her back. “Oh my goodness, Undyne!!! What happened?!”

Undyne was too rattled to speak. Papyrus didn’t hesitate before putting his hands on her and cast his healing magic. Like a soothing salve, the ache of the burns dissipated and her skin began to slowly heal. She sighed in relief.

“Thanks, Paps,” Undyne muttered. She shook her head and stood on uneasy feet, Papyrus helping her up. “Seriously, what the hell happened in there?!”

Flowey wouldn’t look at them. He stared at the machine, shaking with frustrated rage as his vines wrapped around it. “We were so close! We were so close !!! Why couldn’t you just hold on for a little longer?! I could have broken through!!!”

“No you couldn’t and you know it,” Sans said, his voice level but fierce. 

Flowey didn’t look at him. Because as much as he hated to admit it, Sans was right.

The kid was far more powerful than they thought, if even all this didn’t work.

“So . . . what now?” Undyne pressed. “That’s it? It can’t be it! We can’t give up! There has to be another way!”

Sans and Papyrus shared a look. They both knew of one more option, but Sans refused to humor it.

“That’s it.” Sans said, locking eyes with Papyrus.  “That’s the only plan we got. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t believe you,” Undyne said.

“I can’t give you the answer you’re looking for,” Sans replied.

“Yes you can,” Papyrus said, startling Sans. “You just don’t want to.”

“What are you talking about?” Undyne pressed.

“We have one more option,” Papyrus said, turning to Undyne. Sans sunk into his jacket. “We’re going to ask Dr. Gaster for help.”

[twofrontteethstillcrooked]

Confession: Destiel Month 5 Nov.

"Do you recall what you said to me in the Empty?" Cas asked.

established deancas, post 15x18 au, lil angst + schmoop for the 5th of November

Dean felt the spell finally vanish; of course he did. Physically, its disappearance was akin to a soap bubble popping, an ephemeral blink-and-you'll-miss-it. And oh, he did miss it: the emotion that swam to the surface was immediate and severe. He remembered, for the first time in many years, hanging from meat-hooks in Hell, the jagged metal that pierced his flesh and bound him taut, pain hotter than fire and colder than ice blotting out all other thought.

This wasn't that bad, surely? He bent himself in half to touch his palms to the living room floor. The couch squeaked beneath him as he tried to ground himself. He focused on the sound of one of the neighbors laughing in the yard next door, an airliner passing far above, a squirrel fussing at another squirrel.

"Are you all right?" Cas asked, voice low as he put a palm on the back of Dean's neck.

Dean let him ease his hand down his spine and sat up. "Yeah. Yeah." He knuckled away a tear that was threatening to spill. 

"Dizzy? Nauseous?" Cas's eyes were full of concern. 

"No, I'm fine. Scout's honor." Dean quirked a quick half-smile. "Hey." He paused, catching Cas's gaze. "Lookin' good." 

Which wasn't a lie in the least, but Cas made a small huff. "I'm not supposed to say you look terrible."

"I don't look terrible, I look sleepy," Dean countered, shifting his gaze away. "Nap had bad vibes, is all."

"Dean–"

"The spell," Dean said sharply. He exhaled when Cas didn't respond. "The, uh. The thread snapped a minute ago, like Rowena said it would." He couldn't look at Cas so he studied his clenched fists. "So nothing's." His voice shook. "Nothing's got you tied to me anymore." He tried to smile. "Should be a relief, for you."

The silence gaped wide as a canyon, ate up the neighbor, the planes, the squirrels. Only Dean's stuttering breath remained. He stayed as still as he could – you can't move, John would've said, or it'll find you – and ignored the salt water raining on his stupid goddamn cheeks.

He startled when Cas began to drag him, carefully, backwards on the couch, until he was wrapped in Cas, his head tucked under Cas's chin. They fit together snug as puzzle pieces. The first time, over a year ago, it hadn't even been a surprise to find out how good it was to be held by Cas, and it was that lack of shock that had made Dean sob. He was close to sobbing now, with Cas's hands rubbing warmth into his arms. 

"Do you recall what you said to me in the Empty?" Cas asked. His conversational tone of voice made it sound like a rhetorical question; Dean was too shaky to answer regardless. "'You're coming, that's final. Nobody gets left behind.'" He paused to gentle his fingers through Dean's hair. "You repeated yourself. I don't mean, you said something you'd said to me once in Purgatory. I mean, you said what you always said, when you came to rescue me." 

A trickle of confusion needled its way into Dean's brain. He shifted to be able to look at Cas, his ear resting against Cas's shoulder. He let the question show.

"In the Empty, I dreamt about you trying to rescue me. Over and over. You rescued me a hundred times. Jack rescued me a hundred more." Cas swallowed. "Even Sam rescued me a couple of times." He gave a little laugh. "And the darkness would swallow us back up, every time." He kept Dean's head cupped in his hand. "So. You'd said what you'd said before, and before.

"And I said, 'I understand.' Every time. Because I knew my line too." Cas smiled, even though his eyes were beginning to shine with tears. "I knew it didn't much matter, since you – and Jack, and Sam – weren't really there. But I went along with it.

"This one time, though." His smile faded. "You didn't play your part. I was just waiting for the inevitable conclusion, the foregone ending, and you– You did something new. You didn't even wait for me to stand up–"

Dean hadn't. The Empty's thick fog had been wound around them like wet wool, like sludge, like every blood-slickened Hell-memory he'd ever wept over in his worst nightmares, and Dean had known Cas would say the right thing but attempt, as ever, to do the noble thing by sacrificing himself – or, in this case, staying sacrificed. Staying in the Empty for eternity, after it belched Dean into the waking world again like a wad of phlegm from its nasty maw. Dean wasn't proud of much, but he was proud of having learned that he would absolutely trust Cas in any and everything except for his having any sense of self-preservation.

"–before you were cutting our palms and reeling off that spell." Cas's fingers resumed their massage of Dean's scalp. "Turns out there were things stronger than the Empty."

"Jack helped. Sam too," Dean said hoarsely. "And Rowena, you know."

Cas nodded. "You remember what I told you when we fell through the portal unceremoniously into the bunker hallway?"

"Ouch?" Dean guessed. He was curious since, in fact, at the moment he didn't remember.

"I took your face in my hands and said, 'You are the most beautiful sight I've ever seen.'" Cas managed, somehow, to sound honest, earnest, sentimental, and matter of fact all at once. "I wasn't lying then, and I'm not lying now: you're still the most beautiful person I've ever known, and I love you. I am in love with you, irrevocably."

Dean's face in the present was suddenly hot like lava and though he was glad of the late afternoon shadows in the room, those did nothing to banish the ache of tears in his throat. "I didn't mean to tie us together, with the spell," he whispered miserably. "I conjugated the fucking verb wrong."

This was a point of some contention, since he had said the spell fast, before Cas could slip away, before the Empty could sever them apart. His mistake might not have been a conjugation one. He might've used the wrong verb altogether. Dean's memorization skills were first rate, usually. His fear had made his teeth chatter; he nearly dropped his blade; dumb luck he'd been able to say any useful part of the spell Rowena had cobbled together from a half dozen terrifying grimoires. His grip on Latin was maybe not as precise as Sam's. Ego animas nostras ducere. Coniungo animas nostras. Animabus nostris iungo. Whichever he'd said, he'd intended: Cas was coming with him, bodily, out of the Empty.

What the spell – its own tricksy entity – meant was, they were bound together as soon as the words pierced the deadened air and he'd laced his bloody fingers through Cas's, and he and Cas remained that way when they crashed onto slightly dusty concrete.

He'd felt the spell like an extra pulse beneath his skin, right up until a few minutes ago. Rowena had thought it would dissipate more quickly since the spell was powerful, sleek, and unstable outside of its original purpose. Dean wondered if his own fucked-up'edness had kept it in place longer.

"The spell never bothered me," Cas said softly. "But I also never needed it as an excuse to stay with you. Please–" His voice crackled. "Please tell me you know that. I'm not going anywhere unless you ask me to leave."

Dean gathered every lousy bit of courage in his heart and mind and eased himself up, pulling Cas alongside him on their ratty couch. He kissed every word he couldn't say yet into Cas's mouth; he smiled to feel Cas's fingers digging into his thigh possessively. The kisses were fierce at first and slowly became more tender. Dean held on. Cas didn't pull away, and it still felt like a miracle. Maybe it always would. Dean sorta hoped so.

Staring into Cas's dark eyes and unable to stop himself, Dean whispered, "Marry me?" As soon as he said it, he knew it was too needy, but he'd barely formed that pathetic thought before Cas was answering, "Yes, yes," with one kiss for each yes and then another that seemed like its own unbreakable spell, as final as a ritual forged in blood.

"I love you," Dean said, and kissed his husband again.

[thekuraning]

Fic ask

4, 13, 20!

HELLO MY FAVORITE PROFESSOR ELM STAN THANK U FOR THE MEMES!!! hey actually these are all ones i havent thought about so made me put on my THINKIN CAP. and hey actually actually this got really long really fast so im PUTTING IT UNDER A READ MORE!!!

4. a story idea you haven't written yet

Ok so like. I've got these two ideas kicking around in my head from time to time that I'm like. Still kind of workshopping. One is a fanfic and one is an original fic. But basically I've had in my head since forever (10 years of Big Thinking) about a big Digimon sort of odyssey that originally started as a Pokemon x Digimon crossover where I took the Rocket executives and shoved them into the digital world. I have a whole world built for it already and a central sort of issue/theme revolving around a power struggle between the Demon Lords and the Royal Knights. The Royal Knights control HUB City, which is the major settlement in the continent, the Demon Lords control the Dark Lands, and kind of like usual they all want to wipe each other out. There's eventually a viral sort of glitch that starts to deteriorate the digital world and jumps to the real world.

Part of my problem is I've wanted to make it a comic or at the very least an illustrated fic and part of the problem is I'm trying to decide if I want to keep it as a crossover or just slap some new names onto the execs bc i gotta be real, the pokemon world and other pokemon characters. do not feature. at all.

its really just an excuse for me to give petrel a digimon.

anyways they all have full evolution lines planned, i've got a few major story beats, plot points, and the major final twist decided on. i also have 5 amvs that i play in my head on a loop when i drive to and from work.

also in this fic some digimon are gay (stingmon and flamedramon makeout sessions when) and trans (crusadermon, trans queen) ive decided

i think ive posted old art before extending the au to some characters and for my perfworld mutuals if youve seen my sycamore + dukemon art before that specific dukemon is also from this au. ive also got a fic i did publish where i workshopped a little bit of HUB city & a few side characters

i am now realizing i meant to also talk about the original fic i have planned and that one is a short story about a serial killer who murders hitchhikers picking up a hitchhiking serial killer and that one is less planned out but i know they sloppy kiss in the end

13. a fandom you're thinking about writing for

so like besides pokemon and tiger & bunny & digimon there's none i actively have fic ideas for, but some fandoms I think I'd like to revisit are Sonic and Zelda. Actually I had a Zelda fic I abandoned back on FFNet that I'd like to take another crack at one day where the premise was it was a modern setting based on the OOT/TP Hyrule (mostly OOT) where magic and fairies and such are regarded as superstition sort of the same way they are now, and the wondrous races (Goron, Zora, Kokiri/Korok, etc. even the Sheika to some extent) had all died out, leaving pretty much just the human races like Hylian, Terminian, Gerudo, etc. (In this case Termina is legitimately a neighboring kingdom/country and not limbo/purgatory ok??) And the kicker was Link was like. a hardcore atheist. but i think i remember people getting mad at me bc i made his legal name "Mahas" which I MUST IMPLORE YOU. THIS IS CANONICALLY HIS NAME AS OF SKYWARD SWORD. BELIEVE IT OR NOT THERE WAS AN ATTEMPT TO BUILD A PSEUDO LANGUAGE IN SKYWARD SWORD. WE KNOW HIS NAME IS MAHAS BECAUSE IN THE BEGINNING WHEN FI IS JUST CALLING HIM LINK AND NOT MASTER LINK HER VOICE LINES ARE EVER ONLY MAHAS. ONCE SHE BEGINS CALLING HIM MASTER LINK ANY TIME IT APPEARS ON SCREEN SHE SAYS "MAARI MAHAS." SO IM RIGHT OK FUCK OFF IM RIGHT. DIE MAD FFNET. DIE. MAD.

ahem.

im normal now.

anyways yeah i'd like to write for elder scrolls again too i think but like. something more original than the supernatural/TESIV Oblivion retelling crossover i tried once.

You can find that one on my ao3 but im not linking it.

20. in what year did you publish your first fic?

In the year of our lord 2005 (pensive emoji)(raised fist emoji) I published a... fic of some kind to FFNet.

You won't find it anymore, I deleted it a long time ago! I'm not sure if it was 'Rocket Road Trip' or 'The Rebellion,' but it was one of those. I used to write a ton of OC team rocket fics, and this was back in the day when the Rocket Executives had no name so you either thought there was 1 guy exec and 1 girl exec or you thought each exec encounter in GSC was a different person, and that was me. So I gave them all names and threw them into a truck together and i think in the very first chapter they were leaving the Team Rocket HQ and they ran over and left to die the OC who would later go on to be repurposed into Proton except his name was Steve then and he was a special classification of trainer class that I called a "Random Rocket," and the thing about Random Rockets was they all had very generic names (Steve, Bob, Juan, I think there was a Nancy once but she never got to show up in a fic or rp?) but the OTHER thing about Random Rockets was no one knew what they looked like because canonically their faces were all censored with a big ass mosaic effect (this was written, not draw.)

anyways farla cussed me out on 3 or 4 different fics back when she used to cuss out literal children so I deleted all my fics from 2005 - 2008 and then I deleted more of them when I went to college.

don't be like farla.

edit: self-plugging my old FFNet account for the lulz. yes it is i, the original author of Slowpoke Tails and Koffing Fumes.

[novorehere]

Hey all! Just wanted to give everyone a bit of a content update.

I apologize for the lack of content for the past… year. I’ve been working through some stuff, and it’s been hard for me to find the motivation or inspiration to write. It comes in short bursts, meaning I’ve been (very) slowly chipping away at multiple projects at once. I just thought I’d update everyone on how things are going and make a list (partly for myself) of what I have in the works, what still needs to be done, and what you can expect from me in the future. Admittedly these are mostly obey me fics but I DO have other things tumbling about in my brain, I promise.

Opposite Day: 2/5 chapters finished, the rest 100% planned and around 30-40% written.

I’ve been sitting on an unfinished chapter 3 for almost a year now, and have written good portions of the other chapters in the meantime. This is the project I’m most excited to finish, and I feel bad for abandoning it for so long. Rest assured, I *am* still working on it, and am extremely happy it’s been so well received.

Untitled Simeon Comfort Fic: 75% finished.

Originally I wanted this written for his birthday (which was in February lmao) but as you can see that did not happen. I’ve got the beginning and end all written out, I sort of went off the script at the end with fun purgatory hall family fluff so the only thing I don’t have written is… actually the eating part. This will probably be the first fic I actually post, seeing as it’s the closest to completion.

“A series of Obey Me Vore Headcanons” Re-Write (Title Very WIP) 2.5/7 chapters re-written

This one I don’t think I’ve mentioned on here yet. I’ve grown increasingly unsatisfied with my original obey me headcanons list that I posted last year when I first got into the fandom. A. Because I hadn’t gotten very far into the story when I wrote it and didn’t get the full scope of the characters yet and B. (Most importantly) I feel like I really didn’t do the characters justice.

Since I originally posted it, there’s been a healthy amount of discussion on depth and nuance in vore media and reducing characters to tropes, etc. I’d like to re-write this series to focus less on physical aspects and “how they eat you” but rather more of an emotional and story driven story of why they eat you and their emotions and struggles that come with it. The obey me brothers are incredibly interesting characters, and I’d like to explore them in more depth and show you how interesting they can really be and why I love them so much.

This one might take a while to complete, but it’s gonna happen at some point. I‘ll keep up the original half-finished version in the meantime since I don’t want to delete it and ao3 doesn’t allow privating fics without orphaning them. I know it’s ugly in it’s current state, just know I’m working on it and the rest of those chapters will be overhauled eventually.

“Miss Em”: 80% written (kind of)

I’ve had this one sitting in my drafts for a while now. Originally I had plans to start another multi-chapter series but then Opposite Day sort of went to shit so I scrapped it knowing it was way too ambitious. But now I still have a mostly written Mammon fic in my notes app just sitting there and it would be a shame to just…leave it. I’m not sure what I’m gonna do with this one, Maybe I’ll write the Beel companion piece to it that I had planned and just leave it as a 2-parter. Who knows. It’s really cute, and I want to share it at some point.

Untitled Obey Me mini-drabbles: 60% written

Honestly this wasn’t supposed to be a whole thing. I started randomly writing one day on a burst of inspiration and it turned into little mini “scenario slices” for all the characters and I really like how it turned out. I still need to write for two of the characters and polish up some others, but it’s a fun low-stress thing to work on in between projects. Also excited to share it possibly soon since they’re fairly short and shouldn’t take long to finish (but you know me…)

An unspecified ITWOM fanfic: 0% written, 50% planned

For those who aren’t familiar, “In the World of Monsters” is an amazing novel authored by @vore-toast that just recently received a fantastic ending and epilogue (Please read it! It’s fantastic!) And I really would like to write a little something for it to show my appreciation. I have an idea planned out, but details would involve spoilers so I can’t say much. I’d need to ask for guidance on what exactly to include since the things I would like to write about haven’t exactly *happened yet* but I’ve said too much already… hee hee. I don’t know when this fic is gonna happen, but I swear to you it will. And if my original idea doesn’t work out, it’ll be something. I WILL be writing for this series, mark my words.

Heroes Off-Duty. 0% written, ??% planned

Huh? That’s weird... That one’s not supposed to be there. Ah well, It’s not relevant anyway. Carry on.

[spiderh0rse]

felix's mind notes part 5, e21-22 + dreams/ytps and Felix's Mind Forever

e21

Barney's calling over the radio

Felix's vision is kind of all over the place right now

Felix is panicking big time. Saying advice to himself about how to stay alive

just rambling honestly

jumping over hoppers i can only assume

his HEV suits medical systems kick in the instant he's done killing the strider

kind of surprised to see his blood all over the wall

he's in Bad Shape physically and knows it too

finally remembers Alyx's name!

and that's s1 done with!

e22

Felix please we do not need more recap. We do NOT need all the recap this show has given us

well this is excellent cinematography for a no-budget machinima but. but we don't need it

oh he remembers everything!

dramatic pan over the crashed train

Felix's legs! And the rest of him! He's in once piece he's just very very bloody

season 2!

Gordon flashback,, he seems to have helped Felix get a job at Black Mesa. Was not present when their parents died though

"Some wounds never heal."

blood loss hittin Felix HARD

he's stumblin down the train. The HEV suit insists he's about to die and kicks in the EMERGENCY MEDICAL SYSTEMS

Loud electric whine and discharge right as Felix lands facefirst in some water

the HEV suit fixes up the wound as best it can, but Felix still passes out. Alyx wakes him up

one of Felix's worse mornings! Even worse than the one he woke up with the batman ass tattoo

"I live to die another day."

apotheosis, huh...

Felix you're making so many references

"yeah I'm fucked up but I'm up" me every single day of my life

Felix seems. More somber. Odd. Unlike him.

the rain is cold :(

e7.5

wait for it...

RICKROLL

this seems to be an oddly re-edited version of a Barney's Mind episode. Which i have seen but don't remember

Felix rides by on the tram

they're out of sun chips,, AND doritos. Soda time :>

Pepsi, put it in a water bottle, people will just think it's Doctor Pepper! This gets Barney fired

Barney left to Maine and changed his name to Riley Ian

CHELL. you're not my beloved knockoff rychotech Chell but you're fine you're nice

serious injuries are the idea of these tests but fun and learning may occur

ring of fire!! I love this song

Chell can FUCK

THE PORTAL LEAD TO HELL.

Chell was forced to watch whinefield

oh hey Adrian! Most qualified to fight Klondike bars even without his waterproof suit or a high powered vending machine

Klondike bar will not leave his hand

DR PEPPER

this is just mindrian

"I'm gonna go in without a labcoat cuz I'm a sneaky fuck >:]"

Adrian makes it to the surface. Giant bomb! Survives the explosion! Fights it! Wins! Cuz he kicks ass!

complicated shit made uncomplicated

eWat?

I can't tell mindversers apart by voice from time to time but I think that's mindrian

stuck in infinite I hope there's another one purgatory

threatens to squeeze his dick at someone

the return of Klondike bar!

doesn't know how to drive a vending machine

"can you taste the delicious klondike bar? it tastes like ass!"

many words here are cut out and replaced with a very deadpan "dick"

Adrian now fights a mortar ass and moves on to bigger and better things

now stars as batman!

mountain dew plus swiss cheese Felix smell...

destabilizing a yoyo!

meep meep in Canada,,

PRICE? SOAP

one million dollar flashlight

background music engaged

Chell. "I'm like cereal"

Chell fiddling with words and being goofy

that is how we burn it black mesa style

bouncing puzzle to get that mountain dew pumping

the wall could be waffles

letter q,,

very nice lullaby followed by Felix noises. Adrian noises??

Felix's Mind Forever

UAGH flashing images

Felix's first words are contemplating throwing himself off a cliff

bemoans that the sand would break his fall just enough to not let him die instantly

anticipates the guy who lost his. Pal. Will immediately kill himself

Felix says he's had enough of edginess for now

knew someone named Chad once

not killing himself because he's on an adventure!

his bloodlust is sated from all this murder.

not his regular lust.

"tada! :)"

wants to die by firing squad

just glad his weapons are easy to pick up and understand

seesaw puzzles :(

used to find the physics puzzles novel but not anymore

he's HUNGRY. hasn't eaten anything in roughly twenty years. Heehee.

wants lasagna

he's very good at the floor is lava.

uncontested champion, even, since pushing Gordon off the roof. Was stuck on the roof for 13 hours.

got punched in the balls by a rock em sock em

FINALLY beat no nut november

so excited about the new prospects for things to have sex with

BIG xenophilia fan

could go for a vortigaunt, an antlion...

considers humans very horny animals

thinks he's thought about his penis long enough for now. Says he'll do it more later.

doesn't like engineers but respects architects

huh. Well I guess this is slur count one.

squeaks at the antlion queen

"don't get too close you'll make me horny! You wouldn't like me when I'm horny!"

[demigodsanswer]

Chapter 5/13: Rubies

Jewels, part one

CONTENT WARNING: This chapter gets into the bulk of what happened between Annabeth and Luke. This includes revenge porn, verbal abuse, threats, and, the biggest, references to a relationship when she was still underage and grooming. Heed the tags, Luke is a very not good person in this. This chapter is not plot-heavy. It gives context to Annabeth and Luke's relationship, it's end, and her friendship with Silena and Beckendorf. But, if you need to skip it, you won't miss much in terms of the Percabeth plot. I'll be posting part two in a few days.

Ten Months Ago: 

Beckendorf stood in the back of the “Diamonds” rehearsal. He’d been scheduled to learn it, but if history and Chiron’s pleased look were any indication, he’d never dance it. He’d learned nearly every part of “Diamonds” and “Rubies” over the course of his ten-year career, but he’d rarely stepped on stage in anything but emerald green since his promotion to soloist. Annabeth had similarly been slated to learn “Emeralds” many, many times, but she always ended up in “Diamonds.” 

Percy, on the other hand, had danced just about every part of Jewels except for the solos. So when he looked at the rehearsal sheet and saw it indicated he was to learn Rubies pas de tois and the Diamonds pas de deux , he stared at Beck blank-faced. 

“You’re a soloist,” Beckendorf reminded him. “This is what you’re here for.” 

Final casting had come out last week, two weeks before the show was set to go on. Repertory ballets like these didn’t need as much rehearsal as something big like Romeo and Juliet or Sleeping Beauty. They all pretty much knew every part. Beckendorf wasn’t surprised to find himself in “Emeralds” again. And he wasn’t surprised to see Percy and Annabeth cast for “Diamonds.” In the last week or so of rehearsal before casting, Chiron had taken to double booking Percy’s rehearsal, pulling him from “Rubies” into the “Diamonds” rehearsal more and more frequently. 

Still, Beck needed to stand in the back and study the dance again, just in case Percy went out. Standing in the back and watching was always the hardest part of his career, he felt. Sure, the jumps could be rough on the knees, but just standing was the real killer. 

He smiled as he watched Percy turn her around, perfectly on time with the music. Beckendorf had only spent eleven months in soloist purgatory (although it had taken him three years to reach that rank); he was sure that after three years in the corps and four years as a soloist, Percy was working as hard as he could to prove himself a principal. He sure did look like one as he and Annabeth continued their dance.

Beckendorf didn’t remember his own short stint as a soloist very fondly. Almost overnight, he had gone from dancing six ballets a night to one solo in one ballet following his promotion. Even though he had more solo time, his time on stage decreased, and he was never first or even tenth in line for principal roles the way he was now. For eleven months, he was desperate to get on stage and to get promoted. He didn’t know how Percy had managed living in that limbo for four years. 

If anyone had earned their promotion by now, it was Percy.

Beckendorf watched the ballet master’s eyes track Percy’s technique, face, and movement, paying little attention to Annabeth. He smiled; they were testing him, and Percy was acing the exam.

~

Beckendorf ran into Luke in the showers. “Hey, saw Annabeth dance earlier. She looked good.”

Luke smirked as he got changed, heading into his own rehearsal. “Yeah, she’s gorgeous. Shame she has to dance with Jackson.”

Beckendorf furrowed his brow. “Percy’s a great dancer.” 

He was never exactly sure how or when he and Percy had become such close friends. It wasn’t a secret that Percy had grown up a poor kid, a late starter. He’d done a few interviews here and there about his background. Beckendorf was used to those interviews himself, the “tell us the story of your overcoming.” Where Percy had poverty, Beckendorf had race. People often assumed he also had poverty, usually because of his race. He’d grown up upstate going to private schools and good ballet programs. But he had never been that comfortable as the (usually) only Black man in the room. He was praised for overcoming a problem the ballet world created and hesitated to solve. His tour with the Alvin Ailey American Dance Theatre that past Fall and Winter season was a welcomed break from the traditional dance world, as he danced the contemporary all-Black ballet Revelations across the country. 

New York had a hold on his heart though, and not just because of Silena.  

Percy was nice, about three years younger than him, but just as determined and driven to prove himself the way Beckendorf had been. As Percy rose up through the corps, he ended up understudying Beck most of the time. They had similar heights and personal styles. Percy could easily slot in to replace him if he was ever injured. Soon enough, though, Percy started to stand out on his own. Opus Nineteen had been his breakout. Beck had hurt himself. Just a small pulled muscle that kept him out for about two weeks. Percy had hours to prepare to go on, but then, there he was. Like he’d been the one dancing it in rehearsals and dress the whole time. He was adaptable. When they ran Opus Nineteen on the summer tour, Percy had been given the lead role out right. It got him his promotion to Soloist. 

So if Luke was going to try and talk shit, he was going to have to do it about another person. 

He scoffed. “You sound like Annabeth. I swear, he’s all she talks about.” Luke went back to pulling sweatpants out of his bag.

Annabeth was another person he wouldn’t stand shit talking about. But he didn’t expect it from Luke. He’d proposed to her after all. Beckendorf had recently gotten married himself, and he struggled to think of a single thing to complain about, besides, maybe, the state of their bathroom vanity. 

He and Annabeth were the only two apprentices pulled for The Nutcracker the year they joined, and they became partners in pain. Forty-six shows, no skips. Nothing but snowflakes and flowers for Annabeth for two months. Beckendorf got off easy, just party scene and Spanish dance. But still, every day, sometimes twice. She might have been two years younger than him, but there was a fierceness to her that, even at sixteen, made her feel so much older. She could be scary when she wanted, but mostly he knew her to be a sweetheart. She made Luke a better person, that was for sure. He glanced around, hoping she might walk by to curb her fiance’s behavior, but the men’s bathroom wasn’t somewhere she was likely to be. 

“I’m sure you don’t have to be jealous of Percy,” Beckendorf said. He talked to Annabeth pretty often, and he didn’t think she spent too much time gushing about Percy by any measure. As far as he could tell, Annabeth loved Luke more than anyone.

“I know,” Luke said, the smile back on his face. “She pretty much begged me to marry her.”

Beckendorf paused. He didn’t sound overly enthusiastic about getting married. But he’d seen the pictures. Him on one knee, ring box in hand.  He didn’t want to pry, but he felt like he had to ask.

“Do you not want to –”

Luke cut him off before he could continue. “Check these out,” he said, holding up his phone. “Bet Jackson wishes he could see these.”

Beckendorf looked away as quickly as he had looked at the phone. “What the hell, man?!” He yelled. Luke had shown him a wall of photos of Annabeth; the images had been thumbnail size, but it didn’t take long to notice that she was nearly or completely naked in all of them. “She’s your fiancé!”

“Aren’t I lucky?” He said casually.

Beckendorf tried to wrap his head around what had just happened. He felt like he was in some kind of deranged dream that he would wake up feeling guilty about. But it was real, hauntingly real. 

He and Luke had been in the company together for years, but they had never been close. Beckendorf didn’t even show Luke photos of his and Silena’s honeymoon. He couldn’t figure out why Luke thought what he had just done was appropriate.

“You shouldn’t show people those,” he said finally. He felt dumb saying it, like it was so obvious. Maybe it had been a mistake, he thought. He meant to show one photo, but had it in his library. But then again, they’d all been … like that. 

“Please. She wouldn’t care.” Luke said, trying to show him again. He put his phone away when Beckendorf leaned back, avoiding him completely. There was no mistake then. He knew what he’d done. His confusion melted into something else.  

He felt himself getting angrier with each response Luke gave. Beckendorf had great respect for Annabeth and counted her a friend. He couldn’t understand why Luke would expose intimate pictures of her, especially to him.

“Have you asked?” Beckendorf asked, trying to keep his voice below a yell. 

Luke didn’t answer his question. Instead he told Beckendorf: “Relax,” with a suave calmness, as if he hadn’t just shown Beckendorf dozens of naked photos of Annabeth. 

Luke’s calmness pushed Beckendorf’s anger over the top. 

“Do you have any idea how fucked up this is?” Beckendorf yelled, getting in Luke’s face, holding back the urge to throw Luke against the wall. 

The door opened. Before Beck could process who it was, he was being pulled back. “Easy,” Percy said. “He’s not worth it.” 

Percy was right. He couldn’t hit Luke. If he did, he could lose his job or be arrested. Beckendorf grabbed his bag. He placed a hand on Percy's back and pushed him back out the door with him. If Percy stayed in there, Luke might try his little stunt again. And Percy had less patience for bullies than Beckendorf did. Neither of them needed to end their careers over that weasel. 

~

“What should we do about this?” He asked Silena as they left the studio.

She shook her head. She wished she had been more surprised by what Charlie had told her, but she knew Luke better than a lot of people. Dancers rarely thought about who in the costume shop was listening to them. To a lot of dancers, costumers were just as inanimate as the tutus. Luke and his friends were hardly the exception. 

He had seemed nice at first – charming, sweet, all those things. But then he’d flirted with her a little. He even tried to degrade Beckendorf, trying to pull her away from her then-boyfriend. He was already with Annabeth at that point, and she wasn’t careful to keep her voice low when she reminded him that they were both taken. It didn’t help that Annabeth’s career had begun to take off; she was earning leads, first-cast roles, and getting promoted through the ranks quickly. His had begun to plateau. He was already a principal (a well-respected one, at that), and he was eight years older than her. At thirty-three, his career was entering its sunset phase, and hers was on the rise.  

More recently, she’d heard him trying to undercut her accomplishments to other dancers, attempting to take credit for roles and promotions she earned, but she had never expected him to do something this low.  

“We have to tell her,” Silena said. “We can’t let him keep doing this without her knowing.”

Charlie nodded. He had expected that answer. Still, it didn’t mean telling Annabeth was going to be any easier.

~ 

Annabeth wasn’t stupid. No matter how cheerful Silena had tried to sound on the phone (“Can Charlie and I drop by for a few minutes?” she had asked) that something was obviously wrong. She and Beckendorf were close, of course. They had done most of their partnering together for the last three years. But they didn’t hang out outside of rehearsal that often, and they didn’t just ‘drop by.’

What they were coming to talk to her about, though, was a mystery. She catastrophized of course – worse case scenarios all over the place – and she tried to rationalize – your friends just want to hang out.

When she opened her apartment door for them and saw their grim faces, though, she went back to catastrophizing.

“Can we come in?” Silena asked.

Annabeth stepped aside and let them in. “Make yourself at home,” she told them. She had started boiling some water when they were on their way and went over to the small kitchen area to pour the tea. “Can I get you anything? I made us some tea,” She said.

They both declined but accepted the tea silently.

The two of them sat on Annabeth’s couch, while she sat in the big chair at the foot of the coffee table.

“So, what’s up?” She asked, trying to hide how terrified she was of the answer.

The two looked at each other, as if they hadn’t rehearsed this part. Annabeth looked in between them, waiting for an answer.

“How are things with you and Luke?” Silena asked. 

Annabeth smiled a confused smile. “Fine,” she said, “same as ever.” Their wedding was coming up soon. The end of spring, during the company’s five week break. It was stressful planning. Luke was controlling, but then unhelpful with the actual planning. But she’d always been great at organizing, so she had it under control. Same as ever. Making him happy. “Why?” She asked. 

“He just,” Beckendorf said, “he said some weird things to me today.” Annabeth stayed quiet, waiting for him to keep going. “He seemed jealous of Percy.” 

Annabeth resisted the urge to roll her eyes. She barely knew Percy, but Luke perceived him as a threat because … well she wasn’t even sure why. He was a good dancer, younger than him, and handsome. But Beckendorf was all of those things too. So were plenty of company men. She didn’t understand Luke’s obsession with him. 

“I couldn’t tell you why,” she said. “But this isn’t the first time that’s been a problem. I’ll talk to him, don’t bother Percy with it.” 

That hardly warranted a special trip to her apartment, though, she realized. 

“What’s really the problem?” She asked, her heart rate increasing as different possibilities raced through her head. 

They were both silent, but she stared at them, eyes demanding they confess. 

Finally Beckendorf took a deep breath, looked her in the eye and said: “Luke tried to show me nude photos of you today.”

Annabeth shook her head and squeezed her eyes shut as she let out a small laugh of disbelief. Beckendorf’s words bounced around her head but her mind refused to process them. “I’m sorry,” she said, “what did you just say?”

Silena nodded. “Luke tried to show him a bunch of naked pictures of you that he had on his phone.”

“How?” She asked, her mouth barely making words. It seemed so unbelievable she needed to have a clearer picture of the whole thing. 

“He just showed me his photo album on his phone. It was … dozens of them maybe, all at once,” he said. 

Annabeth shook her head again, her mouth open, trying to find words or a deep breath, but both escaped her. Time seemed to halt as what Beckendorf had just told her sank in. She felt her mind and emotions go numb to the news, her anxiety subsiding suddenly and inexplicably. She knew he took them. She posed for them. She thought it was just some kink thing he liked to do. She didn’t even realize he saved any of them, let alone had saved enough that there were dozens in a photo album he could show off whenever. 

It had never occurred to her to tell Luke not to show them to anyone. That seemed like the general rule around nude photos. Keep them private. To show them to any company member … to show them to her friend? The room felt slanted. She wasn’t sure if her eyes were filling with tears or if her vision was just blurring on its own. 

Of course he would, a small voice she’d been suppressing said in the back of her mind. He will always be this way. She looked down at her engagement ring. It was a big ruby circled by smaller diamonds. How funny , she thought. 

“Why?” She finally asked.

 She felt herself come back into her body, no longer floating in a tilted, blurry world. Her stomach twisted up in a knot of betrayal and anger, one that she’d gotten used to feeling with Luke. His less-than-perfect personality traits rose up sometimes, and he lashed out at her. When this knot untwisted, she knew it was mostly crying. But usually Luke was there to apologize, to hold her, to promise he loved her. But he wasn’t here, and that knot tied itself tighter. 

Why? She thought. 

Why would he do that? Why would he do that to me? Why would he show that to you? Why did you tell me about it? She wanted to yell. Anger gripped her gut, and she felt like  she could run the eighty blocks to the studio and make a scene in front of his rehearsal.

“I, uh …” Beckendorf paused for a moment, unsure of how to answer, “I think it was because he was jealous of Percy. You and Percy.” 

Annabeth leaned her head back. She felt like she could scream as the rage bubbled up, finally finding words to attach itself to. 

“He always does this!” She said, standing up and pacing around her living room. “I mean, seriously, if I say I like partnering with someone who isn’t him, and we never partner together because he’s too tall and he knows that, he takes it as some personal attack or some sign that I’m cheating. And I’ve never cheated on him!” She had her doubts about him, though, not that he’d ever admitted to anything. 

She folded her arms on the back of the chair, resting her head in them. “Fuck! I can’t even compliment a coworker?” She yelled towards the floor. “And now …” she paused and looked up. “Why would he show them to you?” She asked.

Beckendorf shrugged. “I told him how good you are Percy looked at your rehearsal, he said some jealous things about Percy, then showed them to me, saying that he bet Percy wishes he could see them. I don’t know if he wanted to prove something to me or tell Percy about them or what.”

Annabeth sat back down in the chair, sinking low into the cushions. The knot in her stomach started to unwind, her anger subsided, and was replaced with a deep and overwhelming sadness that seemed to rip through her chest as she began to sob.

They had gotten into a fight last night over Percy. She had mentioned over dinner that she thought he would be promoted to a principal by the end of the summer, and Luke had gone quiet, ignoring her for the rest of the meal. She knew what he was waiting for: an apology for upsetting him.

She hated doing that. When she was younger, the apologies came easier. She found herself apologizing for crying when he yelled at her.

“I made me cry,” she had once told him, “I knew that doing that would upset you.” She had gone to Helen’s apartment for an all-soloists party without Luke, who, as a principal, hadn’t been invited. He had asked her not to go at all, claiming he didn’t trust other guys to behave around her. She assured him that she could handle herself. A few drinks later, it was just her, Helen, Katie, and a few others left, all getting ready to just crash on couches, air mattresses, or beds. When she called him to tell him, he yelled at her until she was crying in Helen’s bathroom. If Helen had known why she was crying, Annabeth was sure she would have advised breaking up with him on the spot, but, instead, Annabeth faked a panic attack and used that as an escape.

Because she loved him. So much of the time she loved him, and their relationship was fun, and passionate, and loving. Eighty percent of the time, he was the perfect guy.

And twenty percent of the time, he sat quietly through dinner, waiting for an apology for something so minor. When she was about twenty, she learned that it was easier to just offer the apology and move on.

“Sorry.” She said to him finally.

“I don’t know why you do that.” He said. “You know it upsets me.” Luke said, not looking at her.

“He’s just my dance partner.” She protested.

“Well, you sure do think a lot of him.”

“I think that he’s talented, yes.”

He looked up at her. The hanging light fixture over their kitchen table reflected in his eyes, making them almost look gold instead of blue. Annabeth sat up straighter, ready for a fight if there was going to be one. 

“You can’t keep doing this to me,” she said finally. “I’m not a child anymore.” 

His eyes darkened, fixing on her. “Is that really what you think of me?” She clenched her teeth, bracing herself. She shouldn’t have said it, she knew that, but before she could get her apology out, his hand gripped his glass. She caught a flash of it in her periphery as it sailed past her head. She ducked, a yelp leaving her mouth as she heard it hit the wall behind her and shatter. 

She lifted her head up from under the table, and didn’t catch an ounce of remorse in Luke’s eyes. You could have hit me, she tried to say, but the words wouldn’t leave her mouth. 

Luke only continued, the same anger darkening his eyes. “You were never a child, Annie. Don’t blame me for the things you did to me. I was perfectly happy before I met you.” 

Annabeth slumped back in her chair, the fight out of her. 

Luke just stood up, plate in one hand, and dropped the dish in the sink, before heading towards the door. “I’m going out.” He told her.

When the door slammed behind her, she let out a deep breath, sinking into her seat, trying desperately not to cry. Not for him, not again. After a moment, she stood up and went to the sink to clean up. Luke’s plate was broken in the sink, cracked into three larger ceramic pieces, with little shards decorating the rest of the basin. Annabeth took a deep breath again, and placed her own plate over the broken one, resolving to clean it up later.

The plate was still in the sink today. Luke had come and gone so quickly this morning, he never noticed. She hadn’t bothered to deal with it yet. 

Annabeth knew Luke was a lot of things -- most of them good, some of them … But she hadn’t expected this from him. To show someone something so private and without much reason. For what? To make Percy jealous? Beckendorf jealous?

She knew the answer had nothing to do with either of them. He was still mad at her, and what little he could still take from her, he would. There were truths about her relationship with Luke that were crystal clear if she thought about them for long enough, but they were terrifying to deal with.

But she loved him, she reminded herself, and they were great together so much of the time. He had promised her that they would be together and be a family. She hadn’t wanted to get married so young, but they had been together for years. When he proposed he had promised her all of that: family, security, permanence. Everything. It was everything she ever wanted, ever needed. He could give it to her. 

He had been on edge since she became a principal, constantly worried that she would outshine him. “I’m afraid you’ll get too good,” he had said jokingly soon after he had proposed, “and then you’ll leave me.” 

It was an irrational fear – he was a great dancer, and so often male choreography existed to make the female dancer look stunning as he blended into the background.

He was never good at blending, though. He had to be the center of his own career and hers. 

“You can’t do this without me, Annie,” he said during their last summer tour. It seemed almost unprompted; she couldn’t remember what she’d said to him before he started talking. “You’ve never been good at navigating these things on your own.” What things? That nagging voice in her head asked. It’s been eight years. I navigate it all just fine. 

“I’d be lost without you,” she said. He took her hand and kissed the engagement ring he’d given her only a few weeks before. 

“Don’t you forget it,” he said. 

And now …

And now.

She looked up when she felt Silena’s hand on her shoulder. She offered her a tissue.

“Are you going to be okay?” Silena asked.

Annabeth shook her head, not quite sure how to respond.

“I just didn’t think he hated me this much.” She said after a moment.

“Oh honey,” Silena said, pulling her into a hug as she kept crying. Silena didn’t try to convince her that he didn’t hate her, or that he had just made a mistake. She just held her and let her cry.

After a moment, Annabeth sat back up, and found herself talking in circles about her relationship with Luke; Silena and Beckendorf’s faces became more upset and angrier as the stories piled up.

Finally, Annabeth paused to drink her tea. Silena sat back on her heels and told her, “You can’t marry him.”

Annabeth sat up straighter, mug still in her hand. “Please don’t tell me what to do.”

Silena nodded. “I’m sorry, but …” Annabeth could see her searching for the right thing to say.

“If he hurts you like this now,” Beckendorf said, “it’s probably only going to get worse when you’re married.”

“It’s not like he’s ever hit me.” Annabeth said, putting her mug back on the table. That was true enough. He’d broken dishes, glasses, one lamp, but never her.  

“But he controls you,” Silena said, “and he undermines you, and he violates your privacy. That’s not any better.”

Annabeth took a shaky breath. “I just … I don’t know what I would do without him.” The little voice was silent in agreement.

“Anything,” Beckendorf said, “you could do anything without him.”

“But we’ve been together for so long,” she said. “So much of the time it’s so good.”

“Is it so good?” Silena asked. “Or do you spend most of the time waiting for the next time he gets mad at you?”

Annabeth hung her head and began to sob again. I can’t marry him, she thought for the first time. She had had doubts before, but she figured every bride had doubts. But Silena’s question had broken through walls in her mind that kept those doubts out. Was she happy? I can’t marry him.

“I just don’t want to be alone.” She admitted, still crying.

“Honey,” Silena said, “as long as we’re alive, you’re never on your own.”

Annabeth looked up and leaned forward quickly, pulling Silena in.

“I know you’ve been together for six years –“ Beckendorf started. Annabeth didn’t let him finish his sentence.

She took a deep breath, and before she could remember to be afraid, she let it all come out. “It’ll be ten years this December.”

Silena pulled away from the hug and looked at her. “Aren’t you twenty-five?”

Annabeth nodded.

She was sixteen and headstrong. Sure-footed with a chip on her shoulder. And Luke spotted her right away. He was twenty-three and gorgeous. When he gave her a little bit of attention, she nearly fell over herself trying to get more. He was distant at first, then warmer. She showed off for his attention, spending Nutcracker rehearsals trying to find him, to meet his eyes, to stand out in the crowd of snowflakes. She sought him out even when he tried to keep his distance. 

Finally he confessed: “I’ve never felt this way about anyone,” he told her. It seemed so honest to her at sixteen. Then the “but we can’t be together.” He was a principal. She was an apprentice. He didn’t mention their ages. But she was persistent. 

“We can keep it a secret,” she suggested. 

Finally he agreed to take her out. “You’re not like the other girls,” he told her. “You’re smarter. I really feel like I can talk to you, trust you.” Annabeth nodded, glad he saw what she felt too.

 Afterwards, he brought her back to his place, and gave her a glass of wine. When he asked if she’d ever slept with anyone, she lied and said yes. Light headed from her first drink and the overwhelming excitement of being in his apartment, she let him lay her down on his bed and take her. He was so gentle, and it even felt nice. 

The first time he got mad at her -- really mad at her -- was when she confessed that she had been a virgin. He must have suspected, she always thought. But he took the chance to berate her for lying anyway. “How can I trust you to keep our secret if you act this way?” He said. But then he held her when she cried. No one had ever cared for her like that before. 

Did he ever care about you? The voice asked. She wasn’t just headstrong at sixteen. She was lonely and vulnerable. What little family she had had left her in New York years ago to fend for herself. She might have sought his attention, but he let her, he cultivated it. He took her at sixteen and never once expressed shame about it. 

She looked back at her friends, and decided to be honest for once.

 “We went on our first date after my first Nutcracker season as an apprentice.” 

Silena gasped and leaned on the coffee table for support. Beckendorf just muttered, “Jesus Christ,” to himself. His skin looked ashen, and she could almost see him running through memories of their first year in the company together, trying to find the signs. Annabeth caught his eye and shook her head. I’m not mad at you. We didn’t want anyone to see it. His eyes were wide and apologetic back, as if to say, it doesn’t mean I’m not sorry. 

Silena looked more shocked than Annabeth had seen her in the entire conversation. “You could really take him to court for this,” she said.

Annabeth hadn’t thought of that. Of course, she had known that their relationship was illegal. They’d kept their relationship a secret well beyond her eighteenth birthday for that reason. But it had never occurred to her to press charges over it. Especially not considering she was planning on marrying him. 

“I don’t know,” Annabeth said. “I don’t even know what to do about right now.”

“Are you going to break up with him?” Silena asked.

I can’t marry him, she thought again, but the words wouldn’t leave her mouth. “I don’t know. I mean, an hour ago I was happily engaged, and now I don’t know what I am. It’s all just a lot, and I want to talk to him about everything and just … get things sorted out.”

Silena nodded. She opened her mouth to say something, but she was cut off by the door opening.

Annabeth’s eyes met Luke’s, before he scanned the rest of the apartment, shooting accusatory looks at Beckendorf and Silena. Beckendorf stood up, staring at Luke before asking Annabeth, “Do you want us to stay?”

“No,” Annabeth said, “you guys can leave.”

“Are you going to be okay?” Silena asked. 

Annabeth nodded, and she hoped that was true.

~

When the door closed behind them, Luke turned to her, his eyes calm. “What were they up to?”

Annabeth looked at him in disbelief. “You really have no idea why they were here?”

Luke ignored her puffy eyes and runny nose and sat on the couch. “What did they tell you?”

“So you do know?” Annabeth asked. She stared down at him, waiting for him to admit to what he’d done.

“I don’t understand why you’re upset,” he said to her.

She almost laughed at him, she was so angry. “Are you kidding?” She asked. “You violated my privacy, you exposed me to another dancer!”

“You’re mad at me because I love you? Because I think you’re beautiful, and I want to show you off?” He asked. 

Annabeth stood up from the chair and walked away from him. “That’s not what you did, and you know it.” He didn’t look guilty or remorseful. He just stared at her like she was the one in the wrong, like she was crazy for not seeing the situation from his point of view. His indifference felt violent. “We were going to be a family, Luke.” She said, her voice quivering. “You promised.”

She walked towards the kitchen, unable to look at him.

“Don’t be dramatic, Annie,” he said. She winced. “We are going to be a family.”  

Annabeth sobbed again. When he’d said it on one knee, it was so promising, so romantic. Now, it sounded like a threat. She imagined the rest of her life, always feeling this way. Always living with him. She leaned on the sink, afraid she might throw up. Her eyes fixed on the broken plate that still sat there, and finally said the words she had been too afraid of before.

“I’m not going to marry you.” She said into the sink.

“What?” He asked, standing up to walk into the kitchen.

“I’m not going to marry you.” She repeated, turning around to face him. “I can’t believe you would hurt me like this.” That was a lie; he had hurt her like this before, just never in this way. 

Telling it all to Silena and Beck … she finally saw her life for what it was. Pathetic and in ruins, any happiness she ever felt a fragile thing that he broke every time. He shattered her like glass and left her to clean herself up afterwards. She was just a girl, sixteen and alone. He asked her if she loved him, and when she said yes he smiled, but he didn’t say it back. 

“Annie –” He tried to reach out to her, but she dodged him.

“Don’t touch me,” She said.

“You wanted to be a family. And we will be if you don’t throw that away over something so stupid --”

Annabeth cut him off by throwing her engagement ring at him. When that hit didn’t satisfy her, she picked up the vase of roses on the table, and raised it over her head, letting the flowers and water splash on the floor. When she moved to throw it, Luke flinched. She paused before putting the vase back on the counter. She took a deep breath, overwhelmed by her own anger. They stared at each other for a moment. He felt like a stranger to her.

“I want you to get your shit and move out.” She told him.

“You can’t just kick me out.” He protested.

“Oh yes I can, your name’s not on the lease.” She told him.

Luke bent down to pick up the thrown engagement ring. “No,” he said, “but is yours? Or is it your daddy’s name?” He asked. He pressed his body close to hers. This time, Annabeth didn’t move; she stood frozen, half with fear and half with pride. She felt his left hand wrap around the curls at the base of her neck; his right hand held her left hand. From a distance, their position may have seemed romantic, but Annabeth felt vulnerable in his grasp.

She tried to look him in the eyes, but she was met with a cruel look she could barely stand. She stood still, not wanting to make him angrier than he already was. The tug on her hair got tighter, more painful. 

“You’re hurting me,” she whispered. He ignored her. 

“You wouldn’t have anything without him or me, Annie.” He told her. Annabeth shook her head as much as she could with his grip still in her hair. That’s not true, she wanted to tell him, I know that’s not true, but she couldn’t find the words. “And he doesn’t love you, not really.” Annabeth started to cry again. “You’d be alone without me.” He said again. She sobbed, resisting the urge to lean against him for comfort as always had.

 He dropped the hand from her neck. The ring had been clenched against his palm, leaving an indent in his skin. He took her left hand. “So let’s put this ring back on.”

She clenched her fist, resisting it. “No!” She said, stepping back from him before he could grab her again. Her sock met the puddle the flowers had made, and she slipped backwards, crushing the roses under her weight.

Luke leered over her. He looked like he might spit on her or kick her, but he just frowned and shook his head as he slipped her engagement ring into his pants pocket.

“You’ve never been less attractive,” he told her, before walking towards their bedroom

Annabeth sat motionless in the puddle of flowers, watching him move through their bedroom, gathering street clothes and dancewear. Annabeth couldn’t be sure of how long he’d been in there, but he emerged eventually with a suitcase and a dance bag.

“The wedding is off,” he said to her, as if it had been his idea, “until you can get your act together.”

When the door slammed behind him, Annabeth curled up on the floor and sobbed, gripping the roses in her fist. She crushed them until the petals stained her fingertips and the thorns cut her palms.   

[goldrushzukka]

Hey you're the supernatural expert that I follow and I was wondering how true it is that Sam stops being a major part of the show's story after season 5? I've never watched past the first few episodes of season 6

it's not really that Sam stops being part of the story. it's just that all the story that's not about him is so much more interesting.

s6 is the last sam-heavy season iirc? he loses his soul after being pulled from lucifer's cage by castiel who was a little bit distracted fighting the civil war in heaven and left it behind. soulless sam is one of the most interesting concepts they've done on the show bc he does serve as the moral compass throughout the whole run, so seeing him have to be reminded to be The Good Guy is compelling in a way that he doesn't often get to be after that storyline.

in s8 sam does the trials to close hell permanently, which WOULD make s8 a sam season, if not for the fact that his opponent for screentime is the behemoth of post-purgatory dean and cas. for me this is the real turning point, where it stops being a show about two brothers and becomes a show about a man and an angel, and sam is there too.

and maybe that's just me watching with shipper goggles but i truthfully cannot remember what the fuck sam was doing at any point past like s9. he just stops being as interesting as dean and cas, which is especially baffling when you remember that half the writers don't even fucking like dean and cas.

[explainslowly]

do season six

i liked watching it: no, i liked watching parts but there were serious nearly unwatchable sections I had a miserable time with season six. It's a bad season to experience although the more time elapses from having watched it the rosier it becomes in my memories. I think it's partially bc the bad parts are completely unmemorable so it's as if they ever existed.

i like thinking about it: yes I mean let's be real. It's a fun one to contemplate. Hey remember when Sera gaybashed Dean for living with a woman in suburbs???? Demented. Soulless Sam was hilarious. Sometimes I think about Samuel's insane vibe and I have to go lie down.

i like what it could have been: yes Again. Possibly *the* season of wasted potential in many ways? I guess it's questionable if Sera could have ever brought it home but sometimes it's fun to think about the season that was happening in Bed Edlunds brain when he was writing TMWWBK I feel like Purgatory could have been something as a concept metaphysically? Are these souls outside of Chuck's power or just Heaven's? Could have had implications but in the end didn't of course...

i like its broader impact on the narrative: mixed. Some fun parts like everything falling apart in Cas' hands and him being sooo sad and guilty later and heaven slowly spiraling into it's own destruction. I am a leviathan liker so that was fun for me too even tho it's fucking stupid that it happened. On the other hand this is the season that started Crowley as a villain brainworm and it feels like we never shake that all the way to the end... Also, soullesness is a bad and stupid concept. Etc. Arguably undoes the Salmondean character growth from end of season 5, etc.

[bishie-haven]

Asmo Appreciation Week, Day 3: Best Cards, Part 2!

Welcome again, everyone!

I'll cut a bit more to the chase today, since we're in a continuation from yesterday's post. Yesterday I covered #20-11 of the Asmodeus cards that make my heart beat faster, and today I'll show #10-1! These are a lot more potent and have a lot higher potential to melt my soul.

Let us begin~

#10: Guided By Desire

Starting off the top 10 with more nostalgia! While one of two SSR cards people were VERY likely to get in the beginning, it doesn't annoy me seeing him show up...much (I get sooo many ravens now, UGH). BUT, repetitiveness aside, circumstances REALLY put this card high on the list. Even to this DAY it is one of my most powerful cards, even topping a lot of the URs I have on the OG app, so I HAVE to give credit. And even without it...just look at that face, you can't deny its adorableness! (Plus a rare shot where Asmo has pink and neon green nails before they decided on pink and teal!)

#9: Purgatory Hall Sleepover!

Hey look, it's the card that most likely inspired the 2022-23 pajama set! Being the first birthday UR this boy had (and having to wait a full year from its implementation date), I was was EXCITED to see this card art alone. The theming made it even better; sleepovers are another topic that just send me over the moon, and that LITERALLY being the title of the card set in stone that I needed it like water. Thankfully, no money had to be spent, hooray!

#8: Photogenic Asmo

If you thought #16 was colorful, #8 said hold my demonus. This is CUTE in every sense of the word. An overall cafe theme (mixing retro diners and maid cafes without the maids), Asmo in that uniform, and that look on his face getting pics of the sweets?! This was the card that started my completionist journey of getting every card of his, and thankfully, the catalyst was received in a recent revival Nightmare!

#7: Your Personal Venus

This card, this card... The end of February was a wild time for my OM! account. This event plus the Nightmare that was attached were attacking me from both sides in terms of cards I want, and could NOT catch a break (you might be able to guess a card down lower if you think about it ^^). But thankfully, it meant this card was mine within three days of the event start! The initial image is precious (just look at those eyes!), and this one? This was an attack on my soul, how is he able to rock anything and make me love him even more?!

#6: Time for the Main Event!

I grinded in this event when it came out in 2020. Nearly 4 years later, I'm still trying to get him. There's definitely reasons why, considering it's only barely out of the top 5. The Cinderella/fairytale aesthetic is a major reason, bringing to question what Asmo would be like if HE was the titular heroine instead of the fairy godmother in the actual event. In addition, this was the first event where I truly saw him as a gnc icon and ROCKING this dress (I can't unsee the garter belt either, so neither will you now, hehe), and further made me scream whenever future cards indulged this. Now, please hurry up and come home...

#5: Return My Glow

We all know from both the OG and NB that Asmo valued his time as the angel dubbed the "jewel of the heavens", despite slowly forgetting that image of himself. While the event the card was attached to is DEFINITELY controversial amongst the fandom, it still means a lot to me. I grinded my booty off to get it on the last day, and the image (specifically this DF unlock) has the power to make me feel better even on some of my darkest days. It even doubles so when you look at the similar image found in his initial UR in NB (more on that soon!).

#4: The Devildom's Mermaid

Outside of the missed potential to make him an ACTUAL mermaid in one of the arts, this was the first UR+ Asmo ever received, so its iconic status already lends itself to a high placement. Theming is also high here, as WHO can resist the beach episode, tell me, who?! There's also a bit of retroactive mirroring with the anime that happens in my head. I can totally see at one point on that private beach he set up a picture just like this to send to his followers, and that expression sent many (including myself) into an iconic squealing mess.

#3: Demons Catch Colds?!

If you guessed this card at #7, you win a virtual cookie! It is no secret to anyone who knows me well that one of my favorite tropes in fiction is the sick day, one person laying in perceived misery while another tends to their needs. In addition, if you include anything in your work with a medical/dental theme, you will have me eating out of the palm of your hand. This card has both. I was a mess back in April of '21 thanks to this blasted card. Fun fact, this was the first Nightmare card I spent money to get (Solomon decided to block my advances one too many times using the same attribute and I was at my limit 😡)! I only pull out the actual cash when I'm hooked, so you KNOW it was serious. XD Lastly, I said I wasn't taking Devilgrams into account, but I wanted to mention how the one attached to this card is so sweet. If you ever have the chance to read it, DO IT!

#2: Princess Asmo's Escape

They ACTUALLY referenced it!! If you've seen the anime, you know about Episode 5 and the insanity that occurred when Asmo was literally wearing the crown. And the fact that the devs saw it was iconic enough to make a UR+ out of?! I have a lot of gripes with Solmare, but this one of the times they got it RIGHT. He is a Disney princess, you can NOT change my mind, and the composition of this initial image is so pretty I want to make a print of it to hang in my room. It's almost the perfect card! Almost...

Because the top card of all to me is...

#1: A Song From the Heart

This is my absolute dream card, and the closest to the definition of a perfect one you will ever get. So many elements combine to make this both fitting in terms of character and concept. In the initial image we get the cute, goofy side of him (and a shot of him in glasses?!), calmly playing an acoustic. In the DF unlock, that side turns passionate and bombastic, switching to an electric and belting into the mic under the stage lights. It references both the obvious and not-so-obvious of parts of his character. We know that he loves being under the spotlight, but we don't get much in terms of his love for music, specifically rock music as the designs imply. The outfit is also one of my personal favorites, as is many that don't go on the Majolish racks (pleeeeeease let this one be wearable one day!). It even has a bit of a meta connection as well. His VA, Miura Ayme, has PLENTY of musical connections, not just recording OPs for the game but being an active visual kei artist with a HEAVY leaning on rock as a style. So to see a card not only tie back to a character but to the voice actor at the same time? There's nothing I see that's better than that.

And that's my list! What did you think? Any cards I missed in terms of their positives? Let me know if you have any you want to mention, as well!

[kick-a-droid]

I posted 3,032 times in 2022

That's 3,032 more posts than 2021!

67 posts created (2%)

2,965 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@/thecodyagenda

@/gaeasun

@/d3epfriedangels

@/chiafett

I tagged 2,662 of my posts in 2022

Only 12% of my posts had no tags

#sw - 988 posts

#sw: tcw - 826 posts

#other's ocs - 498 posts

#commander cody - 234 posts

#obi wan kenobi - 220 posts

#sw: owk - 189 posts

#commander fox - 184 posts

#ahsoka - 170 posts

#anakin skywalker - 166 posts

#captain rex - 123 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#anyway there's lots wrong in general with tbb but cody being in it 100% means they're going to portray him as someone choosing to ally with

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

hey zip! for prompts, how about “You can lean on me.” for Cody? 👀

leo, thank you so much for the prompt! and i am so sorry this lived in my inbox for literal months but here it finally is!

tw: description of bad injury, description of blood, some casual self-hatred

All battles were gruesome. It was the first and most important lesson of war, and the one Cody would never forget as the gods averted their eyes from campaigns like these, condemning thousands of his vod’e to rot on backwater planets no one would ever visit again. Perhaps the gods only turned their gaze upon the survivors, blessing them with the chance to die in the clinical cold of medbay or sob into the warmth of their batch mates’ chests.

Cody almost always occupied a purgatory fit for one, and this battle was no exception. A deep gash in his left leg was steadily bleeding, soaking through his blacks as he limped to his quarters and away from medbay. He was hurt but the vod’e that had been carried away mid-battle were fighting for their lives and Cody wasn’t going to topple their odds just because the CC label the Kaminoans slapped onto his tube gave him undeserving priority. 

He punched in the code and stumbled through the doorway, sending his armor rack tumbling to the ground as he collapsed. His breathing was labored and his bucket was sending him obnoxious alerts about his rapidly deteriorating health but none of that mattered. The only thing that mattered was he made it to his quarters and no one was going to die because he had been selfish and stupid enough to survive. 

He ripped his bucket off and started dragging himself to his fresher where his med kit was kept, dutifully ignoring the way sweat stung his eyes and how salty his tears tasted. 

The chime to his door went off suddenly and he stopped, panting heavily. 

“Commander?”

Of course it was Obi-Wan. He was nothing if not the most annoying part of Cody’s personal purgatory.

“‘M fine. About to use the ‘fresher,” Cody shouted, hoping the door muffled the way his voice wavered. 

The door slid open and Cody let his forehead fall to the ground with a thud. The godly powers that scorned him now would regret it as soon as he could find a quiet place to die and begin his journey to their thrones. 

“Oh dear,” Obi-Wan mumbled as crouched in front of Cody and ran a gloved hand through his sweaty curls. “Let’s get you to med bay.”

Cody bit his lip, the tang of blood on his tongue a welcome distraction as Obi-Wan turned Cody onto his back and reached for his arms. Cody struggled out of his grasp, ignoring the shooting spikes of pain and the blood pooling below his leg. 

“Cody. You need to get help.”

“No,” Cody sobbed. “I order them to die in battle. I won’t be the reason they die in medbay as well.”

Obi-Wan frowned and Cody turned away, unable to watch the concern chisel itself into his face. “If you don’t get to medbay now, a medic is going to have to come here and then they’ll be short staffed. You don’t want that though, right?” 

Cody glared at him. “No.”

“Good,” Obi-Wan said as he hauled Cody up with ease. 

Cody pushed off of Obi-Wan to stand on his own, refusing to cause him more trouble than he already had. It was a decision he regretted instantly as pain shot through his body and black spots clouded his vision. He wasn’t quite sure which way was up and if he was simply rocking or on a one way collision course with his bloody floor. 

“You can lean on me,” Obi-Wan said as he pulled Cody’s arm over his shoulders and grabbed his waist. 

The shift in weight brought an instantaneous relief as most of his pain fizzled away and his vision cleared. Their first step together brought nothing more than a dull ache and Cody was confident that some of his relief had to be from Obi-Wan’s force osik. 

“Thank you,” Cody mumbled.

21 notes - Posted September 4, 2022

#4

i think it was so perfect for anakin to lose to obi-wan in the same way he lost to him in the flashbacks, only for anakin to then win against reva using the same weapon stealing tactic obi-wan had pulled on him all those years ago.

23 notes - Posted June 15, 2022

#3

click for better quality :)

ballerina!cody because he deserves to look like a sunflower 🌻

references:

pose: x

26 notes - Posted August 11, 2022

#2

WIP Game!

thank you sm for the tag @lost-on-kamino :)))

Rules: post the names of all the files in your WIP folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it! And then tag as many people as you have wips. (You can make your own post or reblog this one!) I have deemed that this isn’t just for writing either. Sketch titles? Comics? DnD campaigns? If you have an unfinished project, it counts!!

oh boy, most of my wips are in the idea stage, lmao, but here they are:

writing:

cereal - cody & rex

lean on me - cody & obi-wan

cold, dead dream - tavi's grandma & fox

no war AU - ventress & trinket

tavi during o66

rise and fall - cody

how blueshift gets his name - blueshift & fizz

blueshift, fizz, and o66

art:

face refs - fizz and blueshift

armor ref - blueshift

blueshift and fizz and makeup

ballerina!cody

plus sized fandom event - ahsoka

hand drawn pfps for a couple of my blogs

the night we met

combo:

intro posts for ocs - jal, norvu, blueshift, trinket, and tavi's grandma

no pressure tags! @thecodyagenda @ct-7567 @fooolisher @turtlepie and anyone who wants to do this :)

34 notes - Posted August 3, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

headcanon that waxer and boil smuggle a goldfish on board the negotiator and make it almost two weeks before someone (wooley) drunkenly tells cody about it.

cody let's it go though, because waxer's argument about morale and the fish being 212th gold was very convincing.

it had nothing to do with the fact that cody finds the fish cute. nothing at all.

anyway there ends up being a ongoing poll for the fish's name and after a few weeks the name commander finley wins.

yes, commander finley outranks both cody and obi-wan. yes, everyone salutes finley when they pass her in the barracks.

72 notes - Posted May 3, 2022

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