#herschels.

[gallusrostromegalus]

The ranch that borders the trail I walk the dogs on has moved their cattle to the Near Pasture, so they were close enough for A Little Man to see (and yell at).

Instead of being bothered or oblivious, all four cattle came up to the fence to stare, and started following us when I had to drag to dogs along because while I was taking that picture, Charlie had found a dead snake to roll in and attempt to eat.

This was extremely exciting for Herschel, who would stop and yell/play bow at them every 20 feet to make sure they were still following. Their barn/shelter was at the far end of the pasture so when we got there, the cows collectively decided that "well, it might be 11AM, but I guess it's bedtime." (A line of reasoning I can find no fault with), walked into the shelter in a neat line and lay down to chew cud.

I have never seen Herschel look so pleased with himself and has been extremely smug all day about it.

[fortheturnstiles]

[agirlnamedbone]

Herschel C. Logan | "Dust Bowl" | woodcut | 1938

[eve-was-framed]

why did he cook here ???? 😭😭

[marypickfords]

How to Make a Doll (Herschell Gordon Lewis, 1968)

[owchie-wowchie]

I can't edit video but I had a vision that must be shared

[nostalgebraist]

The Apocalypse of Herschel Schoen

My fourth novel, The Apocalypse of Herschel Schoen, is now available in full.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

[doctorsiren]

Meet the people of Woodward Ranch! To most West Virginians, the place is just a normal animal sanctuary, but to those in the know, it’s a cryptid conservation ranch :)

Wyatt Woodward is the grandson of the man who used to own the ranch (I haven’t figured out that guy yet so…). His grandfather passed and left the ranch to Wyatt in his will, despite Wyatt only having met the man once or twice when he was little. Now he’s tasked with running the place, as well as grappling with the reality that monsters, cryptids, and the supernatural are very very much real

Lucy Lovejoy is a farmhand / wrangler on the ranch. She grew up living there and is miffed that Wyatt was given ownership. She believes she’s entitled to it because she actually knows the place and Wyatt didn’t even believe in the supernatural until he came to the ranch

Dr. Herschel Finch is the ranch’s science boy (that’s probably not the official title) and he does his magic + science stuff to keep the ranch safe as well as be the resident cryptid expert. He’s very chaotic neutral and would probably kill someone…yknow…for science! Nobody really quite knows his history, despite him telling lots of strange backstories about his past.

Denny is a feral little orphan werewolf girl that lives on the ranch and has deemed it her home. She causes trouble for Wyatt because he’s easy to mess with, but she’s also the one (other than the Mothman) who sees him as family the fastest

The Mothman is one of the cryptids who regularly stays at the ranch. He was Wyatt’s grandfather’s favourite, and so Wyatt quickly becomes the new favourite of the Mothman. Just look at him 🥺 he’s so,,,🫶

Bonus:

Cryptoria is Finch’s ex-wife. Nobody on the ranch has actually met her, but Finch’s reasoning for why they got divorced was that “she was evil”. They question why he didn’t take that into account when marrying a literal demon, and also why that was the dealbreaker, seeing as he’s not one to be opposed to some evil from time to time, but he doesn’t elaborate. He does explain, however, that she tried to kill him. Despite that, he also actively laments the relationship, clearly missing his hot demon wife. Cryptoria divorced HIM because she found him annoying. They’re soooo toxic for each other. They’re the kind of exes that simultaneously hate each other but would totally make out again if they had the chance.

[cherrycolacandy]

This Stuff'll Kill Ya (1971) Directed by Herschell Gordon Lewis

[riveracheron]

happy 3 years of pulp musicals! oh my god this fandom means the world to me and so, so many people around this planet. i dont have the words to begin to say how much i love everyone around this group, and thank you all for collaborating on this with me. here’s to so, so many more.

happy three years of pulp musicals, everyone!!! this story means so much to so many people, thank you all for everything

tags under the cut

credits, from left to right:

maia - @faery-people-of-the-future-day

sia - @eggingtontoast

anna - @madeofkaons

charles - @oswaldpettyeye

the nautilus - orangegiraffe (disc)

steve the gator - rose.and.the (insta)

aj - @violetheart77

dakkar - @riveracheron

kal - @alexorsomn

john - @ricky-mortis

rose - @fallinginaforrest

samuel - @hey-its-robin00

margaret - @projectlida

h raccoon - @eldritch-flame

addison - @bazzleman

taavi - @alexorsomn

jarnathan - grimguinningghosts (insta)

ahlaam - @ricky-mortis / @bazzleman

the stars/constellations - @spiralgalexi

[gallusrostromegalus]

So the tire-eating potholes in my neighborhood finally killed both my rear tires and I had to get that dealt with, but while they were getting replaced, I put the dogs in puppy daycare and upon picking them up early, the attendant literally sprinted to the front desk, grabbed me by the shoulders and breathlessly exclaimed "YOUNEEDTOCOMESEEWHATYOURDOGSAREDOING"

While she escorted me back to the play yards, she explained that every time they have more than three Corgi, they have to put all the Corgs in a separate play yard because they turn into a little gang and bully the Very Large dogs by playing Cow Herding Simulator 5000 with them, and especially if Herschel is there, because corgis are bossy-pants dogs, and Herschel has the bossiest pants of them all and acts as leader.

Despite being a little Don Corgleone to the short bitch mafia, Hershcel is also a Huge Baby and will apparently cry and cry and try to climb the fence and cry and eat people's shoelaces and cry if he is separated from Charlie during playtime, so this means any time that "Corgi Party" is happening, Charlie also has to go to Corgi party, despite being full-height, running cat software and a senior citizen. he copes with being Gulliver amongst the Liliputians by climbing onto the roof of the playskool castle they have for a climbing structure in the yard, kicking the ladder down behind him, and stretching out to nap in the sun while the corgi frolic and gambol around him.

Corgi are dogs that make up and play games with secret rules, like kindergartners. "Everyone bark in sync" is a popular game, as is "follow the leader" and it's companion game "March in a circle around a tall structure like ants caught in a death loop".

So what I was greeted with, when the attendant and I snuck out to the play yard, was the sight of Charlie, sound asleep and flat on his back with his paws crossed over his chest because sighthounds sleep in the stupidest fucking positions, on top of a faux-medieval castle with gargoyles on the corners, surrounded by approximately seven Corgi, all trotting in a circle around him, barking in sync.

"They look like they're preforming some kind of ritual!" giggled the attendant as attempted to get my phone to focus.

"Yeah, they're gonna summon Corgtulhu." I said.

Unfortunately, this made the attendant literally fall on her ass laughing, and distracted Herschel and his compatriots, so they didn't get to complete the summons, and I didn't get the pic.

The attendant kept laughing because apparently she's new to puns, and had mostly gotten it under control by the time we got everyone's leashes on and back out to the front.

The manager was watching the front desk, bemused. Did you get to see them doing the ritual?"

"YEAH!" shrieks the attendant, still excitable with merriment. "THEY'RE- THEY WERE-" The attendant ends up giggling on the floor.

"You okay there Katie?" asked the manager with minimal concern.

"We think they were trying to summon Corgthulhu." I eplain, and Katie screams from the floor. "Wasn't gonna work though, you need a virgin sacrifice and Charlie had an STD when we got him."

It was the manager's turn to shriek. and for Charlie and Herschel to start barking in solidarity.

"That's right Charlie! Your sluttiness saved the world!" I told him, as he jumped up and kicked me in the face.

Anyway, that's why Charlie's nickname at daycare is now "Superman(whore)"

---

If you found this story amusing, please consider donating to my Ko-fi or pre-ordering the Family Lore book on my Patreon so I can buy the good dogs more treats.

[disease]

BLOOD FEAST [1963]

[wonderarium]

deer have terrible eyesight

[alexorsomn]

love these nerds :3

[marypickfords]

How to Make a Doll (Herschell Gordon Lewis, 1968)

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

I seriously love the post you made about insomnia!s/o! Could you do the same prompt but with Ayaka, Edelgard (3H), Laura (cold steel), and Shenhe?

Hugging their S/O to sleep

Genshin Impact: Ayaka, Clorinde, Arlecchino, Shenhe FE3H: Edelgard, Dorothea, Constance ToCS: Laura, Towa, Elliot

First post in question

Man, I really need to start writing for the other fandoms again on this blog.

Ayaka must have been lucky, the only way to stave off S/O's habit of not sleeping was to be cuddled close into them.

Ayaka has zero issue in helping her S/O sleep, especially in such an intimate manner.

Though her face is flushing red, she still can't help but let her smile go ear to ear, hugging S/O close.

She nuzzles her head underneath their chin, listening to their heartbeat and not wanting to miss a single beat.

(Ayaka) "Good night, my love.~"

Clorinde can't help but hesitate whenever S/O gives her a hug, being unused to such intimacy.

But it doesn't take long for her to enjoy the feeling of their warmth, though her hands are usually gently caressing theirs instead of any grandiose display of affection.

And when she learned that S/O slept better when she held them, Clorinde decided that her embarrassment was a small price to pay for her love.

Making sure to not smother them they were comfortable, she lets their head rest on her chest as she sighs in content.

(Clorinde) "Sleep well, S/O. And...should you need me to move, please let me know."

Arlecchino usually had no trouble sleeping herself, but S/O did.

At first she was half tempted to wish them luck in falling asleep and leaving them be, but she wasn't that cruel.

Usually.

She can't always be home for S/O to hold them, but she indulges them whenever she is, still unused to this kind of intimacy from...well, anyone.

Her grip is tight, as her blackened fingers ruffle the back of their head, holding them close to her.

(Arlecchino) "I cannot guarantee that your dreams will be entirely pleasant near me but...I wish you a good night regardless, S/O."

Shenhe nearly crushes S/O's ribcage when she learned that they slept better with her nearby.

The tighter she hugged, meant the better they slept, right?

She lets go and makes sure she didn't cut off their blood circulation and nods to herself.

Shenhe still holds S/O tight, but makes sure they could at least breathe. This was something she both enjoyed and had zero issue in helping.

(Shenhe) "Let me know immediately if you need to breathe."

Edelgard's hugging strength is pretty damn strong anyways, but especially at night.

The nightmares still haunt her even so many years later, and even as Emperor.

Yet, when S/O was so close, the nightmares ceased.

At least in private, Edelgard doesn't hesitate to hug S/O tightly, breathing easy.

For now, she could just enjoy this moment and not have to think about her duties. Just her lover.

(Edelgard) "...Thank you, S/O."

Dorothea is openly affectionate with everything, including hugs.

And it absolutely warmed her heart to know that even that simple act could make S/O sleep with ease.

Zero hesitation and worry, Dorothea gladly takes S/O into her arms as she lays down on the bed, humming a tune to herself in a psuedo-lullaby.

Though, she expects the same to be done for her. If she pampered S/O like this, then it's only right they did the same for their darling singer.

(Dorothea) "Good night, my dear.~"

Constance scoffs at any notion of such affection displayed so easily!

She absolutely was not embarrassed that S/O felt comfortable by her hugs, dispel that thought!

After all, such effects were only natural when receiving it from a Nuvelle!

Pompousness aside, the blush that creeps onto her cheeks are always burning bright whenever S/O falls asleep thanks to her hold, making her mutter something under her breath.

(Constance) "...I hope I'm at least comfortable for you, S/O...N-NOTHING! I SAID NOTHING! RETURN TO SLUMBER!"

Laura is always at risk of snapping S/O like a toothpick with her hugs, but luckily she knows how to control her strength.

It makes her heart skip a beat whenever S/O got close to her in general, but doubly so when they shared a bed.

And whenever she hugged them, it never failed to make her smile to see how quickly they fall asleep thanks to her.

Especially with how tightly she was being hugged as well.

(Laura) "Hm, sweet dreams, S/O."

Towa pouts for a moment since she was supposed to be the one providing the hugs, yet here she was, completely engulfed by S/O's arms.

She's hugging them as tightly as she can, yet she felt like it was nothing compared to S/O's own vice grip.

With her head barely coming up to their chest, she pouts to herself in the darkness.

(Towa) sigh "I feel like a teddy bear right now..."

Elliot is a little nervous sharing a bed with his S/O, especially knowing they struggled to sleep easily.

But it quickly fades when he notices that his presence helps them fall asleep, doubly so when he hugs them.

His cheeks warm up but he can't help but let out a soft chuckle and hugs them with his hesitation quickly rocketing away.

Making sure his hair wasn't getting into their face, Elliot holds S/O's waist closer to him, resting his head against theirs.

(Elliot) "You're really cute, S/O..."