#here! we! go!!! *strikes a pose*

[fantasmagoriam]

Wolstinien Week 2023: Day 1 - First Kiss

[sordidmusings]

jealousy headcanons and scenarios r my kryptonite! especially for emotionally constipated characters lol. for shanks, mihawk, and crocodile seeing their crush interacting with someone that turns out to be said crush's ex? there's chemistry between the exes and are those lingering looks he's seeing?! 🫢

OOOOOOOO GOOD CHOICES GOOD CHOICES 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 I must say I am weak for some jealousy too 💀 why does it have to be so hot in fiction huh??? Or make me feel wanted????? Rude 😤

Three jealous DILFs coming right up 🫡

Jealousy from Shanks, Mihawk, and Sir Crocodile

Your ex comes back into your life and stirs up some feelings - How are these men taking it?

Form this took: started as a bulleted headcanons but then became a scenario/ficlet for each ahsdjajskdajs

Word count: Shanks - 1.1 k, Mihawk - 1.2 k, Croc - 1.2 k

Shanks

The clinging and diverting type

This mf tries to be covert about it

Key word: tries

It’s no secret that Shanks is the jovial sort and that his welcome and cheer extend easily to newcomers. However, something curious happens when the next one joins your large table.

You always have at least a part of Shanks’ attention, so the way you shift uncomfortably and curl slightly in on yourself is not going to go unnoticed. You catch yourself and relax back into your usual posture, but Shanks knows you well enough to see there’s a posed touch to all your expressions. It tames them from the genuine displays of your thoughts and emotions that Shanks so loves into something more suited to a diplomat seeking favor. Now that had him wary.

It took no genius to notice that each time a great laugh broke out your eyes would sweep to that newcomer to take them in, or how your would flicker your gaze over to them every time you had the spotlight, as if seeking approval.

Gods Shanks hopes that isn’t the case

Driven to seek comfort in your presence, Shanks leans into his affectionate nature to keep close to you. You can’t think too long on someone else with him constantly leaning into your space to whisper dumb jokes and silly observations. He made those laughs and he gets to enjoy them up close and personal. You may look to others but you always look back to him when he ventures to lay his hand on your shoulder or hand or thigh and give a happy, hearty squeeze before retreating. He relishes in the fact that you had been uncertain of his touch when you first met yet now you trust and even welcome his hand on you.

Shanks is burst right out of his bubble of avoidance when you suddenly jolt and sit straight, separating yourself from his side.

The cause of his sudden and very dire lack of you is that very same newcomer. The newcomer, who is leaning in so close to you. The newcomer, who now has all of your attention. The newcomer, who is giving you a smile that Shanks very much does not like. It’s very charming and holds a twinge of remorse that Shanks knows from experience would strike straight and true right to your heart

“I’m glad to see you in happier times. You look good,” they have the audacity to say, the words even seeping with honesty. Shanks isn't sure he focused on anything in his life as hard as he does on your reaction in this moment.

Your smile is breathtaking, one he isn't sure he’s seen before, all affection and understanding and a dusting of yearning. It turns his heart to goo right before it clamps it tight and squeezes, because that smile isn't for him. He needs that smile to be for him. His mouth is moving before the thought even sinks in.

“We do like to keep things cheerful here!” Shanks chuckles to the newcomer. He turns to you, making sure to catch your eye. “Life’s too short to anchor yourself to your sorrows.” Now back to the newcomer. “And this one-” an arm slips around your shoulders, hugging you to his warm side, “-helps keep it that way.”

The smile you give him isn’t quite as overflowing with emotion as the one you gave the newcomer, but he loves it all the same.

Unfortunately, that’s not the end of it and the newcomer actually sits down on your other side and insists on catching up. Shanks is a damn charmer though, and he knows it, so he’s not one to give up on keeping your attention through the night.

He stays in the conversation easily, not deterred by the newcomer outsider bringing up shared memories with you, even though they squeeze at his heart and lungs tighter and tighter. He uses it to get to know more of you, a part of him truly enjoying the new insights. However, a much larger part is simply set on keeping the reminiscing light instead of romantically charged.

As the time and drinks flow, his and the outsider's tactics get more obvious yet you get more oblivious, simply cruising on the comfy fuzz everything had taken on and enjoying the company. Your unintentional refusal to pick a favorite has both of them getting desperate and daring.

Try as they might, the outsider is clearly outmatched

By the end of the night you’re wearing Shanks like a perfume, he’s stuck to your skin at the heart of your body, chest always tight to your back or side, chin often hooked over your shoulder or on top of your head. His slight scruff tickling at your ear when he moves and talks is exceedingly distracting. So is the softness of his hair on your neck when he turns his head to bed his cheek into your shoulder and pull you a little tighter to him, saying its just 'cause he's a little sleepy and trying to get comfy. He unearths himself from his resting place only to seek it again every few minutes.

His arm is always around you when he wasn’t using it to drink (of course) or toy with you - tugging at your clothes for attention, tickling your sides to interrupt you, sweetly scratching your scalp to derail your train of thought, teasingly rubbing a thumb into your hip or thigh to feel you squirm.

Shanks is a handsy motherfucker (ironic right-), so you don’t take any of this as a proclamation of his love. The most you think is that it has just hit that point in your journey together where his vast appetite for partners has finally swept its way to focus on you.

You end the night giggling the whole stumbling way back to the ship, tucked into Shanks’ side. You manage to stay there despite being at the mercy of both of your swaying, constantly blending who’s supporting and who’s slipping. Your ex is far from your mind when Shanks tucks you in sweetly (well… sweetly to a drunk; in all reality you kinda flopped in, but he did make sure you were shoeless and properly under the blankets, and he even shuffled back in to put water, crackers, and medicine where you could reach).

Shanks does however have a flash of your ex in his mind when he's happily gloating to himself that he had won.

His last blurry thoughts are of how to make sure you and everyone else unquestionably knows that you are off limits. The unspoken claim understood by the crew while he works at winning you over doesn't seem to be enough anymore. Especially if that pesky ex comes sniffing around again. Maybe they just need a lesson in what staring down Conqueror’s Haki truly feels like.

Mihawk

The intimidating and biting type

Mihawk would likely be the most covert of these three, at least as far as your notice goes

Your ex has no questions about Mihawk’s dislike for them. With his reputation as emotionless and solitary, it’s not guaranteed that your ex will put two and two together to realize that Mihawk's dislike stems from their previous relationship with you. Even if Mihawk hints at it, they'll tell themselves that they're imagining things. It’s much more likely that they’ll think it’s because Mihawk is that way with all but the Few Exceptions, and they have definitely not made the cut.

It definitely didn’t help that they were a marine

Mihawk is already unhappy to see a marine on his doorstep, no doubt sent to yip at him about some nonsense or other that the admirals were in a twist over. That unhappiness quadruples when he hears you tentatively call to this marine by name, and then it multiplies again when the marine responds by breathing out your own name with shock and hope

This pest needs to be out of his castle quickly

Yet he can't bring himself to simply throw them out when you come over so disgustingly happy to see them. There were a few times where he'd interrupted or snuffed out your joy while adjusting to you joining his home, and he found the feeling it gave him insufferable. That's what forces him to let the pest in and guide them with you to the smaller dining room.

He’d simply have to find what the pest needs fast and expedite whatever catching up you two apparently must do.

That's easier said than done; you and the pest are insistent on taking time between flustered pleasantries to share uncertain smiles and lingering looks of longing in charged silence.

It's giving him the worst mood he'd had in years.

At first he tries to discourage this lingering with his mere presence. He knows he's capable of pumping out enough sheer displeasure into the air to knock out a squadron, so he keeps it to his other tools: body language that makes him feel larger than the room and a glare sharp enough to split hair. Both make the pest cringe and shy away, but the chance to gain your favor makes them push through it. Even though he hates it, Mihawk can't blame them.

Mihawk can tell that his mood is setting you on edge too - almost anyone would with the perturbed looks you've been sending his way - but that isn't technically taking your joy, so he doesn't back off.

In fact, he decides it's time to push even more.

He begins interjecting in your conversation, mostly with little insults to take the wind out of the pest's sails.

You aren't yet tipped off that there's something hiding behind his mood; he was never fond of braggarts so it isn't so out of the ordinary for him to humble someone. Of course, you wouldn't exactly call what your ex is doing "bragging" so much as filling you in on their growing career. They are actually relatively humble about it, clearly just excited to fill you in and not phrasing things to seek your praise.

Then Mihawk starts complimenting you.

Mihawk is not one to dish out praise. You've had to fight tooth and nail to get the mere drops of it you'd tasted so far, so his sudden highlighting of your positive traits trips your sensors. It isn't exactly alarm bells ringing, more it makes you feel like there's something you're missing. You figure it's the sudden disruption and old instincts from his Marine Hunter days cropping up.

You would have never guessed that his aim with his nitpicking and praising is to make sure your ex knows for a fact that you are out of their league. They don't deserve you. But he could.

No matter the reason though, you certainly relish in Mihawk calling you things such as "necessary for [his] castle", "smarter than those inane marine trials", "finally proficient and needing no distractions to ruin that", and "better company than a bunch of sea monkeys". Sure, from most anyone else they'd feel slightly insulting, but from everything you've so far seen of Mihawk that's a glowing review.

The uncanny nature of this whole interaction, from Mihawk's tank in mood to the sudden praise, keeps your focus away from your ever shrinking ex.

Mihawk is simply delighted to see your attention going to its rightful place, on him. You should be looking at him with such interest and joy. You should be seeking his approval; not some simpering swine's.

He figures he's been patient enough (it's been almost a whole ten minutes after all) and it is time to end this farce.

Mihawk stands from his spot and goes to sift through the wine rack. He returns with an above average vintage (even by his tastes) and two glasses. He sets them at the corner of the table so he can deftly open the wine. The silence as you both watch him work elates him.

The first glass is placed in front of his seat and swiftly filled. You watch the action with admiration for his fluid and confident motions. The pest watches with growing envy.

The second glass is filled while still sat in the corner, keeping its owner ambiguous.

The bottle leaves one hand and that glass enters the other, coming with Mihawk as he moves to stand behind your chair.

His full height set strongly in sharp shoulders and straight spine cuts a devilish figure behind you. Your ex's first impression was that he is haunting you, but there's some little whisper in their mind that, no, Mihawk is protecting you.

That whisper gets stronger as Mihawk leans forward over you, getting much too close to be polite while he places the wine glass down directly in front of you. His eyes hold the pest's with an air of warning the whole time.

Mihawk settles back upright, placing a hand on both carved corners decorating the back of your chair. The act seems clearly possessive. But surely Mihawk couldn't have found some special fondness for you?

You are none the wiser to Mihawk's antics behind you, too enraptured by the closeness of his reaching arm then too distracted checking out the color and aroma of your gifted wine.

Having at least enough pieces of a functional brain to pick up on that cue, the pest begins rushing out some excuses and makes to leave.

Kind as you are, you tell them they don't have to rush off, but they're adamant. You're a bit sad to see this chance meeting end so quickly, but your mind quickly settles on thinking it's for the best. Your memories of them are distant enough to be cherry picked and seeing them scamper off so easily reminds you that there are reasons you parted.

Mihawk chases escorts them out and returns to you looking much less belligerent and much more at ease. You figure it best to not risk ruining the positive turn by questioning it, yet you can't help but ask one thing.

"I usually have to pour my own wine from the kitchen's rack. What's the occasion?"

Mihawk takes a sip and the comfort of one of his favored wines coming over his senses coerces him into loosening his tongue.

"You've been good." Another sip and he thoughtfully adds, "I could give you more rewards."

Sir Crocodile

The assertive and analytical type

Despite Croc being a plotter, I see him as being quite direct in this situation

Ok yeah maybe he insists it’s because you can do better and you’re definitely above crawling back to an ex (“you broke up for a reason didn’t you?”)

But maybe he also takes this as his opportune moment to get you into his clutches.

Who could blame him when he feels the threat of such an unworthy little nobody working so hard to catch your eye.

Croc always keeps an eye on you, no matter what else demands his attention. Sure, there's an obsessive edge to it, but he just needs to know what you're up to - has to know you're safe near for when he needs you. You are the best assistant he's ever seen after all, and he's been through an army's worth. He's sure his new organization would've crumbled if you weren't there to balance out the clown and his circus monkeys constantly shooting themselves in the foot (sometimes literally).

Many of those circus monkeys were even stupid enough to try and approach you themselves. Luckily for him, you seem about as enthused on the idea of you having a partner as he is.

Which brings us back to his irritation that you haven't swatted that bug away from you. No, instead you seem to be rather tolerant of their buzzing. Maybe even fond.

That just won't do.

The crowds at this schmooze-fest, thrown to entice more pirates and criminals alike, part easily for his beeline to you.

It only irritates him even more that you don't notice him until you're swallowed by his shadow. You even have the audacity to look surprised when you turn to him.

And you truly are surprised - as far as you know there's no reason for Croc's usual grimace to turn into something so stormy, especially directed at you. It quickly jumps to your ex however and focuses that torrent there.

"I don't know you," Croc states gruffly.

"I'm-"

"Your name doesn't matter," Croc interrupts. "What do you do? Why are you here?"

And thus begins the interrogation. You can only watch perplexed as Sir Croc tugs every bit of information he could want out of your ex, making sure to cut off anything he didn't care to hear. That frustrated look and tone become more bored by the second. Every tone tells your ex that they're barely worth the breath to speak, causing them to shrink even faster than Sir Croc's anger did.

You catch their eye and send them a sympathetic smile, and then Croc moves on to you.

"And you," he starts roughly. He lets you sit in suspense while he drags those hooded purple eyes from the crown of your head to the toes of your shoes and back. "Why are you here?"

You're taken absolutely aback by the question, mouth flapping from a mix of shock and offense. You have quite a list of things you keep your eye on at these parties; did he want you to go down the whole thing? After a deep breath, you try, "To gather informationof and from possible allies and help build relationships?"

"Wrong."

Well, at least he let you finish your sentence. Time to try again.

"To make sure the night runs smoothly," you say much more surely. It's an apt description of your overall job.

"Wrong again." Yep, that grimace is now definitely a smirk. One that only widens when you purse your lips and stare him down. You notice the genuine amusement shining in Croc's eyes and relax a touch, content to let him guide this to whatever destination he has planned.

"Then please, Sir, tell me," you relent. "Why am I here?"

He takes a deep puff of his cigar before pulling it from his lips and watching the smoke swirl out with his exhale. You watch it too - admire how handsome he looks reappearing through the haze. Enjoying how small you feel as he leans over you through its last remnants.

He rarely touches you with his golden hook, always using his hand (you've yet to realize it's because he prefers to feel you on his skin). Now, though, he raises it towards you. You're surprised yet again when the curve touches beneath your chin to tilt your face just a little higher; the metal isn't cold like you thought it would be. It must be warmed from resting on his thigh. You shake away the thought of warming it further.

He takes his time assessing you, giving you your own time to look over his breathtakingly chiseled face, admire his striking scar, forget everything else but his eyes on you.

Without intention, you gravitate towards him, leaning forward enough into him and that golden hook drawing you that you have to catch yourself with a stumbling step. The fond chuckle he gives in response resonates deep and rich and feels like a reward flowing over you.

"You, my dear," Sir Crocodile says with unfamiliar mirth, "are here to keep me happy."

"And how would you like me to do that, Sir?" you whisper back.

At first, that just earns you a smile. Then he's drawing his hook along your jaw, tickling the tip around your ear, drawing it gently across your cheek. It ends its journey on your lips, ever so gently pulling your bottom lip down before letting it flick back up when he draws his arm away. You watch the glimmering gold retreat. He's greedy for more of the longing he sees in your eyes. He leans slightly lower and gives you back that hook, this time in the form of an offered arm.

"With your company, of course," He finally answers. The warmth you hear in the drawl of his voice is beautiful.

You slip your hand into the crook of his arm, happy you can feel his body heat through the soft fabric of his shirt.

Halfway back to his previous spot, you realize that you'd become so distracted that you hadn't even said goodbye to your ex. You had wanted to exchange numbers, maybe truly get back in touch and feel out if things would be better this time. Noting how deep your draw to Croc is, you already feel that that would be a dead end. Well, maybe some time rekindling things would help your daydreaming and wishing for Sir Croc finally start ebbing away.

"Did you see where they went?"

Croc has to hold in his smile at your question. "They scurried off on you. It's for the best though; they were exceedingly unimpressive."

You couldn't help but snort at his assessment.

After guiding you to your chair and pushing it in, Croc settles down himself. When he reaches for his awaiting drink, he notices Daz Bonez come back into the room, wiping his hands off on his pants. Their eyes meet and Daz Bones gives a firm nod before heading back to his other duties for the night.

Sir Croc smirks and takes a heavy sip of scotch.

~ ~ ~ ••• ✦✦✦ ••• ~ ~ ~

There you are sweet anon, I hope you enjoyed and that it properly scratched the itch❣️ Thank you for the ask 🤍 Sending much love!!!

Part of a little celebration

[dovveri]

strike a pose

synopsis: momo’s the best photographer in korea and she’ll be taking your pictures for the annual haute couture magazine

warnings: swearing, 69, mutual masturbation, filming during sex, taking pictures during sex, reader has a praise kink

w/c: 4.6k

a/n: can be read as a standalone but also follows directly from sana’s part

⌞ ⌝

"momo!"

a pretty girl with bright blonde hair pokes her head out from around the corner, eyes brightening when she sees her assistant with you in tow.

"come in! i've been expecting you! y/n right? sana told me all about you!"

"s-she did?" you gulp nervously, unsure of what exactly sana told the world-class photographer.

momo grins, "enough anyway. c'mon- let's get you changed. we've got quite a few shots i want to try out today. sana really outdid herself with the outfits this time. i can't help but think she was a little more inspired than usual." there's a teasing lilt to her voice, like she knows something you don't.

you can only allow yourself to be ushered along as hands start pulling at your clothes, makeup brushes touch up your face, and hair rollers are placed into your curls.

after your appointment with sana, she had managed to get your contact number, either through your agency or whatever else. it was mainly just for business though, she’d ask for your opinions on certain colours or ideas she had, treating you as if she didn’t fuck you senseless in her workshop upon your first meeting. you just took her lead and pretended it never happened, though every time her name lit up your phone screen you’d feel a little tingle down your spine at the memory.

"alright! let's get going team we have a lot of shots to take today!" you hear momo's stern yet excitable voice over the pop music in the studio. momo's reputation was just as prestigious as sana's, though she was admittedly a lot less intimidating. people said it was because of her general airy obliviousness that made models feel at ease and comfortable when posing for her that made her a pleasure to work with. of course, that never diminished from her actual job at hand, she was the best photographer in korea, always booked out and only shooting for the best magazines and companies across the country. she could be a little awkward but her work spoke volumes, she was simply better at communicating with her tool than with her words.

you're rushed over in your first outfit of the day, an extravagant, floral piece with a set full of colour and vibrancy. once all the stylists are done touching you up and hurriedly move out of the camera frame, momo wanders up last, smiling and adjusting your body to her desired position.

her touch is soft, barely there, it leaves goosebumps on your skin, or maybe it was the fact that the a/c was on high.

"alright?" she checks in on you, eyes twinkling.

you gulp from her proximity, the only thing separating your bodies the camera hanging around her neck. you nod sheepishly, unsure of yourself.

she smiles, "just let me know if you want to take a break or anything yeah? remember you're the most important person in the room here, if we don't have a model, we don't have pictures, so don't be afraid to make any demands at all."

you nod again, not trusting your own voice to speak, but you appreciated momo being so accommodating of you.

with that, she steps back, holds the camera up to her face, and starts taking photos.

⌞ ⌝

momo isn't the type of photographer to yell out compliments or directions while she's working. she stays quiet most of the time, only asks you to keep natural and do whatever feels comfortable. it's not awkward though, you could tell how focused she got when she was working, how much effort she put into her job, what a perfectionist she was.

soon enough, you've run through all but one of the outfits and backdrops, the swimsuit segment.

your hair is being curled into wavy, ocean-swept locks when the stylists pull out the skimpiest bikini you've ever seen. after they're done clipping together the pieces, some of them even have the shame to look away despite having seen you in all your naked glory multiple times during the shoot. you thought it was a piece that was perfectly reflective of its maker. covering almost nothing yet leaving everything to be desired, teasing in the most erotic way imaginable.

the studio has already been cold enough with the air-conditioning on full blast, but now with the new beach backdrop and a mist fan blowing directly on your body and face to give your hair the appearance of being freshly blown through with a sea breeze, you're near shivering.

it doesn't help the chills going down your spine every time momo glances over at you. and momo makes it known when she likes something and when she doesn't. and the way she was stalking towards you like you were her prey, her eyes dragging over your body again and again, licking her lips, until she's almost nose to nose with you, it was pretty safe to assume she liked what she saw.

"alright?" her voice is husky, like she's controlling herself from doing something not so work-friendly.

you can only nod, breath hitching.

"hmm... are you sure? you don't look alright."

"h-how do i look?"

she gives you a devilish glare, "i don't think you want me to answer that y/n."

"why n-not?"

she leans in even more, you almost close your eyes out of habit before you realise she's breathing next to your ear, voice low, only meant for you, "is that how we're playing this? you're gonna act stupid? or... do you have a praise kink y/n? want me to tell you what a pretty girl you are? to tell you about how i think you look absolutely succulent and how badly i want a taste? how i want you riding my face with your perfect tits swinging back and forth while you leak into my mouth, my camera set up recording every movement, every sound, every scream you'll be making because of my tongue? is that what you want to hear?"

your ears were always sensitive, even momo breathing near them has you squirming and the inside of your bikini bottoms soaked. you whimper as she whispers filth into them, feeling light-headed and desperately needing to hold onto her or you'd be at danger of falling over and exposing just what she made you feel to all of her staff.

she smirks, turning on her heel quickly and barking , "out! everyone out! good job today but I'll be finishing up these final shots myself. thank you all for your hard work."

her staff exchange glances a little uncertainly, never having been told to leave early by momo before, so they were unsure if that was what momo really meant.

momo tuts impatiently, "did you not hear me? pack up! let's go!"

her staff are prompted into movement, hastily running around and collecting their personal items before bowing out of the studio. momo glares down anyone that looks to be dawdling for too long, tapping her foot and ensuring her studio was empty before turning back to you.

you gulp, grateful the makeup on your face was covering the bright red blush on your cheeks. you both knew what was going to happen. it was a little absurd this was happening to you a second time when both times it's been 2 of the most influential people in the fashion industry. you're still in disbelief that they wanted you.

momo eyes you again with a smirk, fully appreciating you without the burden of her staff bustling around and calling for her attention in the background.

"alright gorgeous. let's do some standing poses first. whatever makes you feel the most confident."

you nod, taking in her direction and pushing one hip out, raising both arms to mess around with your hair, face morphing into a practiced smile, going for the sexy, energetic woman on the beach.

momo starts snapping away, humming and checking the photos every now and then, there were a few she took from certain angles that were a little... questionable, but you weren't one to question, so you let her do whatever her creative freedom asked her to.

"now can you lean forward? hands on your knees please."

you blush, this was a classic swimsuit stance, it would be fine, there was nothing to be shy about.

you do as she asks, switching your happy-go-lucky smile to one that’s a little more seductive.

momo takes a second to raise the camera to her eye, staring at your chest like she had lagged out. but once she does, she’s back to work, making sure she gets all the best shots.

“now lie down. on your side.”

you gulp, following her instructions. momo moves the fan to be at your face level, so it’s still blowing through your hair. she lingers a little, adjusting your face, hand on your chin. her eyes are stormy, the hint of a smirk permanently etched onto her lips. her hands drift from your chin, down to your shoulder, gliding fingers leaving goosebumps in their wake. your breath hitches audibly when she slips down to your side. she hums approvingly, her smirk growing as she traces your side, your stomach.

then she slides backwards, leans back on her knees and brings the camera back up to her eyes. you’re caught as her shirt lifts, her very visible abs peeking through.

momo clears her throat, “camera’s up here darling.”

you lick your lips, not even needing to fake your next look, reeking of pure sex. all you can think about is momo’s abs, her thighs, the way her knees are spread, her biceps, her well-endowed chest, all that muscle she was packing underneath a teasing smile.

she takes the picture.

then she’s the one leaning forward, going on all fours, crawling towards you slowly.

you hold your breath as she reaches you, nudging your hip lightly so you’re lying horizontally. and then she’s hitching a leg over your side and sitting on top of you.

your hands instinctively go to her hips but she catches them, pushing them above your head, her chest smothering your face in the process.

she leans back too soon, bringing the camera to her face, adjusting herself to sit better on your hips. “there we go. you’re a pretty girl.”

you blush brightly at her comment, looking away shyly. she starts snapping immediately, grinning. you compose yourself and look back towards the camera, biting your lip, drooping your eyes, satisfied when you hear the stutter in momo's work before she starts clicking again.

once she's happy with those shots, she moves off your body, but keeps a hand on your stomach to keep you there, pushing down slightly letting you know who was directing you, who owned you. then she's propping up a beach ball, or an umbrella, you couldn't really tell you were too focused on the way her abs tensed as she lifted and shuffled things around.

she leans you back, then slides her hands down from your stomach to your thighs, pushing gently.

your eyes widen, unable to resist as she spreads your legs, licking her lips as she stares.

“m-momo.”

“hmm?”

“um- the- the photos?”

she clicks her tongue, “impatient are we? just let me enjoy the view for a little.” her eyes track back up your body, smirking at the hooded look you give her, breaths coming in and out visibly harder, your arousal too obvious to ignore.

after what feels like forever sitting in your own slick, she finally moves backwards, bringing that goddamn camera back to her face, her smirk only growing wider with each passing second, before she starts to click.

she takes a few shots, then feigns disapproval, frowning down at her camera in the most exaggerated pout you have ever seen, so you know it’s just for show.

“y/nnnnn~” it’s cute, too cute. “i don’t like these. will you… spice it up a little?”

you take a breath before responding, steadying yourself, “spice it up?”

“yeah. y’know…”

“…i-i don’t.”

momo’s expression changes immediately, scowling, her cutesy show over in a flash, “don’t be a brat y/n. you know what i’m talking about. you think i can’t see you dripping for me? you think i can’t see the way you’re squirming, how you’re imagining the way i’d feel under you, inside you? don’t make me spell it out for you. be a good girl and do what you want to do.”

she's completely right of course. her words only encourage the thoughts you've been keeping locked away since the moment you saw her. you didn't think it was professional for this to happen a second time, hell the first time you didn't think it was professional.

but you gulp, hesitantly bring your hands down to your stomach, tracing the skin there lightly. you feel your nails dig in just lightly and you gasp, hyperaware of your body and all its sensations. the cool air of the room, that fucking fan that's been blowing wet mist at you for the past 20 minutes, momo. god momo. she was so fucking hot. in that sleazy, greasy, nice-guy way straight girls found film bros hot. except momo had the face and body to match the arrogance she hid under practiced professionalism and niceties.

you whimper as a hand trails up and captures a breast.

momo grins, bringing her camera back up to her eye, more vocal now than she has been the entire photoshoot.

"there we go. now we're getting somewhere."

you feel your breaths go heavier, no longer able to hide yourself as you ache to rub your thighs together.

she notices of course. she notices everything about your body.

"don't you fucking dare. tease yourself. make it worth it. make yourself earn it."

you try and take a breath to steady yourself again, though you don't know why, each breath hasn't been helping at all, only making the matter worse as you become more and more aware of your arousal.

with difficulty, you bring your other hand to your chest, now groping both your tits, moaning fully, completely on display for her while she snaps away.

"there we go- that's good- more like that- mhmm-"

momo mumbles praises and compliments that make your head dizzy and your pussy clench. your fingers find two hard nubs that have been begging for attention since you had gotten in this glorified piece of cloth. you pinch simultaneously and let out a pathetic sound of lust.

momo gets it all on camera. zooms in even.

knowing you had an audience, that this was being recorded, it gave you a sick sort of thrill that made each squeeze of your hands feel that much better, each click of momo's finger, like she was rubbing your clit with each photo.

one hand slips under the bikini top, doesn't reveal it to the camera, but it's obvious where it is, pulling and twisting as you writhe, legs shaking, sweat collecting, desire building.

momo comes closer, sits right between your legs, keeps them open, captures your face mid-moan, anyone could hear the pornographic sounds you were making without needing film, the pictures momo took were enough. she was that good.

the heat of another person near you makes you grow desperate. "m-momo- p-please- i- i- i need-"

"hmm? what do you need darling? tell me. remember i said you're the most important person in the room. without you, we don't have pictures, without you, i don't have a job. so, what do you need?"

"y-you! please-"

"me? what do you want me to do to for you?" she cocks her head, acts confused, you know better.

"w-what you said e-earlier! p-please i'm please- i'm begging-"

"oh you're begging? why are you doing that? i'll give you anything you want darling. there's no need to beg. do you think i'm that mean?" she pouts, has the audacity to look completely innocent even while she has you under her, dripping onto the floors of her studio, hands groping at your chest, back arching trying to get closer to her.

"m-momo!"

"what?!"

you almost cry, sliding your right hand down your stomach, straight into your bikini bottoms, the waterproof material did it's job too well. you couldn't tell from the outside, but the inside, it was drenched. you moan as your fingers meet your folds.

momo doesn't even glance down, keeps staring at you in mock ignorance.

you slide a finger up and down your slit, gritting your teeth as you rub your clit harshly. too harsh, you would come too soon. you ease up, sliding back down to your entrance, hips bucking up, other hand still twisting at a nipple.

snap!

you roll your head back as your hips rock against your hand, letting her slide down and position herself right in front of your cunt, lens pointed directly at it. you can't look at her, too embarrassed as you push your fingers in and out of yourself, just centimeters away from her face, from her instrument.

you've been groping at your chest enough that the material has ridden up, half of your chest exposed to the studio, to the flashing lights at each click of momo's fingers, and fuck you needed more space. so you hastily pull at the strings tying the bottoms together, just one side while your other hand keeps pumping in and out of you. it falls away easily and you feel yourself clench around your own fingers at the gasp momo lets out, snaps growing quicker in succession.

the hand that untied your bottoms goes right back to your neglected tit, rubbing and squeezing while you hump your hand.

you risk a glance down, and you almost cum at the sight.

momo's got one hand on her camera, the other down her pants.

it's a little pathetic, the way she's grinding down on herself, trying to alleviate the tension that's built up in her lower stomach, such a pretty girl reduced to a horny loser at the sight of pussy, but it gets you so hot knowing she was affected by you.

your eyes focus in on the hand trapped between the floor and her cunt, the rapid movements giving you an idea of what was going on inside her pants. you start to match her pace, bringing the hand that was palming at your breast to rub at your clit, pushing it around in little circles as you gasp and moan and clench for her.

momo curses under her breath, cheeks flushed as she stays on her stomach, a shaky hand still clicking away, changing settings, zooming in and out, capturing every moment of your build-up.

it was too much, her focus, the way you're pulsing, the flashes of the camera. you cum.

your vision whites out, throwing your head back, unable to hear the little curses momo lets out as she pulls her other hand out of her pants, frantically grabbing for her camera to be able to capture your full glory in your orgasm, her fingers still covered in her own slick, zipper undone as she scrambles to her feet.

you keep pushing in and out of yourself, slowing down the circling on your clit until a full stop, breathing heavily as your vision returns.

you blink, looking around hazily, pulling your fingers out of yourself with a wet squelch.

you find her eventually, stumbling around with her pants fallen to her knees while she fiddles with different cameras and light settings.

your post-orgasm haze finds her adorable. so different to the woman who said she'd have you screaming on top of her tongue. she was unpredictable, your initial canvas of her was wrong. she was simply... momo. she was unique, the only person who could possibly understand her was herself, and you doubted she understood herself. but that didn't matter, because she's good at what she does and she gets what she wants.

she notices you watching her after a little, blushing and kicking off her pants fully.

"sorry y/n just gimme a second."

you smile, shaking your head, "it's alright."

you watch fondly as she finishes up, but with her legs now exposed you can't help but feel the twinge of arousal in your core as your eyes follow the muscles of her thighs, her calves, her ass when she turns and bends. she acts so oblivious but she must know what she's doing.

you sigh, leaning back and running your hands up your stomach again, appreciating the view. you finally take off the bikini top, freeing your chest and groping freely at them as momo stands back up.

she checks the camera once more, then takes off her top. her bra follows quickly after, and she turns.

her eyes narrow as she stalks towards you, chest swinging proudly as you whimper, pinching your nipples and wishing you could just bite down on hers.

"i see you started without me."

"mhmm~"

"i told you to give me a second didn't i?" she stands above you, arms crossed over her chest, pushing her breasts together sinfully. you notice the wet spot on her underwear, trying to hide a giggle but failing.

she raises an eyebrow, pulling her panties off. that gets you to stop, your mouth watering at her cleanly shaven, dripping cunt.

"something funny?"

"n-no."

"c'mon. i like funny things. tell me."

"nothing's funny."

she kneels down in front of you, on all fours, your eyes go straight to her chest.

"impatient and a fucking liar."

you whimper.

she juts a finger behind her, her eyes never leaving yours, "i'm giving you what you wanted now. what i said. that camera's filming us, so are three others around the room, just so we get every angle. now you're gonna sit on my face and look pretty. understand?"

your eyes widen, wet already from your first orgasm, fresh arousal starting to build up. you nod.

"good girl."

you squirm at the term, watching as she lies down, then pulls on your thighs to get you to kneel on top of her. you're a little embarrassed as you lower yourself, but momo doesn't give a shit. she yanks you down and starts eating like it's her last meal.

your hand comes up to your mouth in an automatic reaction, trying to stifle the sinful moan you let out as she starts lapping at you. you can't control yourself. you never could around her. your body reacts on it's own. riding her face.

momo sucks your clit into her mouth and your knees buckle. you're afraid of suffocating her but she shares none of the same concern. arms pulling you down as you try to pull away, licking and suckling.

you look directly into the camera she has set up in front of you, imagining how messed up your hair was, how utterly ruined you looked.

momo's hands are on your ass, pulling you down still, but she lands a slap, the sound echoing throughout the empty photo studio.

you yelp, gushing into her mouth. she happily drinks it up, spanking you again.

the ripple of your cheeks must be captured on the camera behind you, maybe if momo had the quality settings right, it could even see the slick flowing from your cunt into momo's mouth, onto her tongue.

you can't bear to look into the camera anymore, eyes drifting down to momo's chest.

god you could finally see her. pretty dusk-coloured peaks sitting on top of the breasts you'd only be able to conjure up in your wettest dreams. her abs flex as she huffs with effort, making sure not to let a single drop of you go to waste, working efficiently and thoroughly at your pussy, licking into every wall, every corner. her cunt glistens, you notice her thighs rubbing together and you resist the urge to roll your eyes. you do it anyway but only because momo has her tongue inside you, hits a spot that has you seeing stars.

you test her, placing a little more weight on her face. she moans eagerly around you, pulling you down further.

satisfied she can hold you up, you shift your weight onto one hand, the other tracing down momo's chest, circling a nipple.

momo groans, vibrations sending shockwaves of pleasure up your core.

you grasp the flesh, squezzing as her tit spills out between your fingers. momo bucks her hips, almost shakes you off of her, but her grip on your ass is tight, she wouldn't be letting you go until you came all over her tongue.

you're still moaning uncontrollably when you lean down, still groping a tit, pressing your own chest against her abs that feel absolutely heavenly flexing under your nipples, rubbing and moving giving just the barest amount of friction that drove you insane.

you grip her thighs, resting the front of your body on hers so you could part them, licking your lips at the sight that greeted you.

her cunt was pulsating. clenching around nothing, slick dribbling out of her. she talked so much but she was just as turned on as you. you planned on giving her what she was too proud to ask for.

you dive in.

momo moans into your cunt, hips rocking up before you push her back down, lapping at her pussy.

she tastes divine. otherworldly. salty and sweet, uniquely hers, just like everything else about her was uniquely hers. momo's grunting and moaning so prettily, and you're cleaning her up, even while she continues making a mess, you know you're not much better.

you grind down against her while she rocks up into you, chasing your highs. you find her clit, sucking, reveling in the moan she sends through your body, not wanting to be beat, she doubles down, growing almost overly aggressive as she sends another slap down on your cheeks when you're least expecting it.

you can't hear each other, can't scream out the curses, her name, all you can do is grind and moan and suck.

the blinking red dot of the camera gets it all. every brush of nipples against stomach, every flick of tongue, every squeeze of ass.

it doesn't take much longer.

not when she just keeps sucking. you're sure she could draw your pussy by now, that she's memorised it all. you could probably draw hers.

your back arches as you cum, and you make sure she falls apart at the same time, massaging her thighs as she writhes and cums, whining into your pussy, drunk off your taste.

you roll off of her before she can get you going again, lying on your back, your elbows pushing you up as you finally get a look at her.

she's covered in you. huffing, throwing her head back to breathe, cum dribbling down her chin. you can't help but crawl towards her, licking it up, towards her lips.

she lets you kiss her, still catching her breath as she pants into your mouth, the taste of the both of you mixing on your tongues.

you break away, licking your lips and wiping your chin.

momo grins lazily, "i think we got some good content."

you snort, "you think?"

"mhmmm. mina will definitely be happy."

your eyes widen, "you're not showing these tapes to myoui mina?!"

"and to sana. she asked for them."

your mouth falls open, gaping dumbly at her while she laughs, patting your cheek.

"let me know if you ever need any shots done. i'll be happy to help. i'll send you the tapes too once it's edited." she winks, wobbling back up and going to check the footage.

you stare after her, still in disbelief that the three of them really were in kahoots this whole time. and then the self-consciousness hits. they were going to watch those tapes. they were probably going to cum to those tapes.

just what the hell kinda industry did you get yourself into?

[hoe4sports]

How this ends p4

Alexia Putellas x Fridolina Rolfo x reader

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

A note from the author: Yehaw, this took an unexpected turn. In the phone calls, Alexia’s dialogue is blue. It’s a bit long, but very divided into different scenarios on the trip to Sweden. It’s a different one, but it’s still about alexia. Use your imagination on the social media post.

The next part will be the last part.

This is based on Lewis Capaldi’s “how this ends”.

Warning: None, a curveball perhaps. A healthy dose of angst.

Summary: You try to go on vacation with Frido, but Alexia won’t leave you alone.

-

"Okay, fine, but what about this!"

You strike a pose showing off your outfit which made Frido laugh. Her eyes were as bright as a christmas tree, and you couldn’t help but think about how Alexia never bothered to watch you show off your lastest purchases. The attention was something you had craved for years. But as the good woman you were, you waited for your turn to have time with Alexia. Fridolina on the other hand, she loved spendning time with you. Ever since you met Fridolina went she came to Barcelona years ago, she had been your bestfriend. Your go-to. The one you confided in. The pair of you had over the course of your and Alexia's breakup developed your own everyday routine.

She would wake up at 5.30 to get ready for work, before making a breakfast for you both to enjoy together prior to you driving her to the stadium. During the drive, you would talk about a good thing that happened yesterday before singing along to Taylor Swift. The duo did the same thing after work: you would pick her up from work, she would hop into the shower and you would make dinner for the pair of you.

You couldnt help, but admit that it felt good to have someone appericiate you the way Frido did. It had been ages since Alexia had made you feel anything but bad about using her previous time or wasting her seconds. Frido was kind, attentive and what could be best described as warm. She made time for you, and if she had plans; she would always ask if you wanted to join.

“Sorry, did I forget to tell you that we are going to Sweden, not Antarctica?” Frido teased you which caused to you cross your arms over your chest. Your sent Frido a sassy look.

“Atleast I would look cute meeting all the polar bears!” You fired at her while pouting. The comment made her giggle which brought a redness to her cheeks and a sparkle to her eyes. The kind of glow that you only see in movies. It made her tan skin compliment her eyes, and she was definitely a sight for sore eyes. For your sore eyes.

Time had been moving fast, and you were to go travelling with Frido to spend time with her family in Sweden in only one day. The thought of spending time with her parents and siblings made you a bit nervous, but you tried to not stress over it since this was supposed to be a fun get away. Frido had even introduced you to her parents over FaceTime to make you feel better.

“Here, try this on instead. It’s something I bought earlier, but it’s too tight-it hurts my biceps”

“Are you implying that I don’t have big muscles, big strong athletic football beats?”

“Uh,wait, no, I-“

“Relax babe, I’m kidding! I’ll try it”

You take the sundress and flip it off your body, before grabbing Frido’s hot pink linnen dress and slipping it over your head. You reached down to pull the dress below your bum. Your eyes moved to see the reflection of the dress in the mirror behind Frido. Her eyes were glued to your reflection, and you tried your best to pretend that you were looking at yourself. But your eyes stole a gaze whenever you could. It felt good to have someone look at you like Frido did. Your hands played around with the fabric of the dress before you settled on a fit. It perfectly complimented your breast, butt and waistline. You felt like a million dollars.

“Fridolina, I love it”

The material of the dress was light and the lace on the edges of the dress felt like a nice touch to the look. The cut complimented your shape perfectly. It made you feel as close to being Scandinavian as you possibly could. Your gaze turned around to meet Frido’s, she was smiling at you with a heartwarming smile.

“See, I knew you would look stunning in it! You look so good in everything, Skatt ”

The compliment from Frido made you blush to an extent that you didn’t even want to admit. And the nickname? Oh gosh, don’t even start about the nickname. She stood up next to you before reaching for your hand, and sending you around in a twirl. The moment felt illegal, but magical.

“Thanks babe, I honestly love it. It makes me feel like I was born to be Scandinavian” you giggled.

Frido looked see into your eyes as she winked before tucking your hair behind your right ear.

“Becoming Scandinavian, huh? That can be arranged”

Your jaw dropped dramatically before looking at Frido who just smirked back at you. You couldn’t help, but start to question your and Frido’s friendship. You rolled your eyes at her before playfully slapping her shoulder. Then you flipped the dress of your head, and placed it in the “yes” pile.

The evening went by quickly with Frido teaching you all about her family while laying together in Frido’s bed eating your favourite crisps. She told you about her weird cousin, Emil, who would essentially play tricks on everyone that came along. Her niece, Dina, who was just the most adorable little toddler. And her grandmother, who gave the best hugs, but made the worst coffee. Watching her talk about home, was a real eye opener to you. You could tell that she really loved home; both the place and the people.

-

“Passport?”

“Yes”

“Wallet?”

“Yup”

“Phone?”

“Uh-huh”

“My cool and obviously super special Sweden jersey for my favourite person to wear?

“Don’t get too high on yourself, Rolfo”

A part of you felt confused. Your heart hurt terribly at times, even so bad that sometimes; you thought you were about to have a heart attack. Your heart crumbling up into pieces of glass laying in a pile at the ground. It was all that was left of you and Alexia.

The jersey Frido had given you to wear for her match was her special jersey. It was one of her Jesery’s from the World Cup with the opponents flag sown into it. The opponent was Australia, and it was the match that gave her her first worlds bronze medal.

Normally, you would’ve worn Alexia’s Spain jersey during international break. She never gave you her special jersey anymore. At one game, you even used Mali’s jersey to prove a point. When Mapi confronted Alexia about it, she had just shrugged. She didn’t know that she was about to experience the biggest loss of her life.

You held the jersey up from your backpack and waved it at Frido. Somehow, she had convinced you to place it in your carry on just incase they would lose your suitcase. Then you still had something to wear for her big match, and you happily obliged.

“Good, special jersey for my special girl.”

-

The excitement and the buzz of the airport were bringing forwards feelings you had deprived yourself of feeling. The truth was that you loved to travel. You would be searching up an adventure whenever you had an availability in your packed calendar. Something deep in your soul craved to experience the world and its wonders. Cultures had always been fascinating to you, and you loved to share the wonders you stumbled upon with your followers.

One that was not as impressed with your wish to travel lately, was Alexia. She had seen the countless photos of you and Frido hanging out. Pictures of the pair of you doing anything from making pasta to going to the beach. And for Alexia? It felt like the world was ending. She had tried to reach out. But you refused. She tried talking to Frido, who also refused. It sparked an anger, almost a jealousy in her. How could her teammate just swoop her ex-girlfriend off her feet?

As you grabbed your phone from the tray at the security check, you noticed a missed call. Your attention was quickly changed when Frido was ready to head for the kiosk to get herself a book and a bottle of Pepsi. You agreed to sit outside to watch over her stuff, but secretly; you were planning on returning the call. Your hands trembled as you picked up your phone, and pressed call on the contact that had already tried to reaching you. Your throat felt dry, and your skin felt itchy. You could feel yourself getting hotter by the second, which ended up with you sitting in your lululemon tank while feeling anxious. “God”, you thought to yourself. “Why am I so nervous? It’s just the same good ol-“

“H-Hola, uh, hi, please don’t hang up on me”

“Alexia, what do you want?”

“Uh, lo siento, how..How are you?”

“How am I? Really? How am I??”

“No, no.. Vale, I’m sorry, lo siento. Can we talk?”

“…About what?”

“Us”

“There is no us anymore, Alexia. I’m sorry.”

“But, I just, please.Hear me out?”

"Ai, give me damn a good reason»

«Because you were my first love, my only love”

You sighted loudly. She pulled the first love bullshit.

“…Vale, im busy right now. Estoy con Frido en el aeropuerto, et-“

“Que? Con Frido? Fridolina?”

You rolled your eyes. You were allowed to do anything you wanted.

“Si! We are going to Sweden to see her family”

“Que? Para ver a la familia de FRIDOLINA??”

“…Si?”

“No, no mi amor! No, lo sien-“

“I’m not your amor anymore, buttercup.”

“Por favor, escúch-“

You looked up, and your eyes immediately caught Frido moving towards you with her bright smile. Frido who took care of you. Who brought you with her to Sweden in a heartbeat. Who loved you for you. It felt like your throat was drying up. Like it was thick with air.

“-I’m sorry, Alexia. I have to go. I’ll call you after the trip. Don’t expect too much . Goodbye.”

Your hand instinctively turned off your phone not wanting to hear more from your ex-girlfriend. Your ex who didn’t want to travel with you. Who didn’t get around to purpose to you in the span of 13 years. Who promised you another cat when you had to wait for kids. Who never kept her promise.

Frido came walking towards you with a bag in her hands. Her face was lit up and she was looking like her usual happy self. She could be best described as a golden retriever whenever she was off the field. You loved her for that. When she was on field, she was hard, bad, tough and intense. But at home, she was soft and kind and gentle and just.. perfect?

“Girly, wanna see what I got?”

You nodded before sliding over to make space for your bestfriend.

“I got you a Pepsi, a magazine about exotic places to travel, a book about loving yourself, a box of Pringles and a bag of gummy bears. I hope you like them, if not then I’ll always switch with you”

Your eyes teared up from the thoughtfullness. It felt good to be cared for, Frido’s natural warmth was healing for your heart. It felt like she was slowly collecting all the pieces of your heart to glue them back together.

"Thank you, Fridolina. Really, for everything"

You tried to choke a sob, but it ended up sounding more like an owl. It sent you both into a giggle before Frido wrapped her toned arms around you. She was slightly taller than you which made you feel safe in her towering presens. She pressed a kiss to the top of your locks.

"Anything for you, sötnos"

-

After travelling for hours between Spain and Sweden, you had finally reached Frido’s hometown where you had plans for the next few days. Frido’s parents had come to the airport to pick you both up, and you could feel some nerves creeping up on you after moving towards the luggage claim.

Frido spotted her parents immediately who was both standing there with flowers and a Swedish flag.

“Hej, Fridaen min!” Her mom cheered while her dad waved the flag towards you. It made you smile sincerely. Her mom wrapped her arms around her daughter. The similarities were striking. You could definitely tell where Frido had her looks from. Her mom then looked at you before pulling you into a bear hug.

“And there is the girl that Frido has been talking about! Välkommen, Y/N.”

-

Safe and sound in her childhood bedroom, you walked around and admired all the posters that teenage Frido had put up. A few of them were of big footballers while others were popstars. One picture, showed Frido as a young girl with another young girl. A blonde. Both wearing a Swedish jersey that was just a little bit too big with shiny gold medals around their necks . The girl, you recognised as Magda Eriksson.

“Wow, Magda Eriksson right?”

“Starstrucked?”

“Well, yes! She’s a-mazing!”

“Then you are gonna die when I tell you that I have personally volunteered you as her babysitter for the games”

“Babysitting? Do you want me to walk around and make sure she doesn’t trip over herself?”

“Girl, are you jet lagged out of your mind? Her kid!”

You maked an o shape with you mouth slightly embarrassed that you didn’t know that she has a kid, but also somewhat excited that you would get to babysit. You loved all types of kids, and it had been your dream to become a mom since you were just a little girl.

-

Later that week, you found yourself sat in the family and friend's section with Frido's mom and dad, You also had baby Eriksson sitting on your lap chewing away on her fingers because Pernille was also on national duty. Their little girl was only shy of a year old, but already rocking the sweden shirt. She was the sweetest little girl, and she adored you right back.

"Look, Look, Elsa, Its your mamma!" you cheered at the toddler as you pointed towards Magda. Magda waved at Elsa which made Elsa kick her feet in excitement. "Did you see her? I bet you did, you are such a lucky little girl!" You cooed at the happy toddler. You couldn’t help but feel odd. You had imagined having your own baby by now, maybe even two. One baby and one toddler to keep you on your feet. To point out their mami on the field to. But instead, you were stuck with being a babysitter.

-

After the game was over, Sweden had won 3-2 to Ireland. Magda and Frido came over to you, and you immidiatly moved down towards the fence. Magda reached her hands towards you, and you expected her to grab the baby: but instead, she forced you and the baby over.

"Look at you, Y/N! You look like you have never done anything but been a mother, absolute natural!"

Frido cheered at you which made you blush. Little Elsa was a joy to be around. This was one of the things you had imagined would be your life by now. Bringing you and Alexia’s daughter to matches in her little Barcelona jersey with “Mami” on the back. Taking her down to the field to kick the ball around and say hello to the girls. Alexia giving you and her little girl a cuddle while the media took cute pictures for you to repost and get frames. You and Alexia with a little family was all you had ever dreamed of.

“Do you mind watching her? I’m just gonna go take pictures and sign a few jerseys”

You nodded immediately. The toddler had just started walking, and she was becoming increasingly wormy. You giggled at the toddler before walking over to get a ball. You sat the toddler down and passed the ball towards her. She kicked it back a few times before falling on her butt. You ushered towards her as you made a surprised face.

“Uh-oh! Did you jump on your butt? What a cool trick!”

It made Elsa giggle, and you scooped her up in your arms before spinning with her a couple of times. The girl was giggling like only a toddler can, her smile wide with happiness.

“More, More!” She yelled when you stopped.

You immediately shifted your grip on her and threw her up in the air before catching her. It reminded you of when you father would do the same with you; you loved it and so did Elsa.

“Y/N, thank you for watching her! Alright, Elsa. Say «byebye” to y/n” Magda gratefully said before taking Elsa into her arms.

“Really, Y/N, thank you so much. She loves you already, please come to our others games too. Elsa would love it, and I’m sure someone else does too”

She looked towards Frido who was talking to a fan. You blushed before saying your goodbyes with Elsa and Magda.

Later that night, you got a notification on your phone. It was from instagram. Frido had tagged you in a post, and you immediately clicked the notification.

-

Fridolinarolfo

Liked by MagdalenaEriksson16, pharder10 and 84 962 others.

Fridolinarolfo Sötnos

MadalenaErikkson16: Newest Swedish wag?

User277 Wait, is this a hard launch??

User252 Isnt this @AlexiaPutellas girlfriend??

User2737 I would’ve never guessed?? Im here for it!!

You closed your eyes. Partly in confusion and partly in happiness. You loved the picture. A picture she snapped on field when you were playing with Elsa. That’s was when your phone buzzed again. But this time, it was Alexia. It’s was a message from the woman you once called “mi vida” and “mi sol”. You open the message up even though you probably shouldn’t. With trembling hands, you open the message.

Mi vida

Por favor, te amo. Por favor no digas que frido y tú están saliendo. Lo siento muchísimo. Quiero hacer las cosas bien, darte lo que te mereces. Lo que debería haber hecho todo el tiempo. Sólo dame una oportunidad más.

It made your head spin. You felt physically ill. In a few days, you would be heading with Frido to Ireland, to watch her play. All before going back home to Barcelona. Back to your ex-girlfriend’s country. Where you have to deal with this whole situation. Clean up Alexia’s messes. You think that probably shouldn’t have gone to Sweden, but then again: Alexia missed her turn. And you and Fridolina are just bestfriends, right?

[brainjvice]

I am very insane about this pic so I'm gonna try to "break it down" (more like give my take on what's going on here apart from noa serving 85 kilograms worth of cunt) So yeah, more under cut.

God there's so MUCH going on here. Where do I start.

My take is that this pic may take place in the parisienne slums, where Noa was born. It would explain the graffiti, the broken pavement and the fact that noa is at the centre of the pic. The fact that he's sitting on a glass chair is making me froth. The pose. That's the pose of someone who stands on business.

Y'all know where else we saw glass associated to a character? Exactly. Kaiser's glass ego. Although I think Noa's glass chair represents something else. To me it's linked to Noa's status as the numer one striker. He sits on the throne but the throne is made out of glass. So one day he will inevitably lose his spot (and look who stands right behind him). Noa seems to know about it though, like look at his confident pose. He knows and he is Fine with it. He also lowkey looks ready to fight.

Yeah right behind him stands Ego motherfucking Jinpachi in all his slenderman-esque figure.

Ego: sit back down

Noa: I'm sat.

Before that I also want to talk about chris prince's tits sporty look. He is a vibe. Also I love how snuffy is designed after an eagle lmao the eyes, the hair color, the fact his headband covers his brows to give his eyes the peculiar cut prey birds have. Peak design. Love it. I also adore how Lavi looks like the Uncle who gets too drunk at your wedding and breaks havoc lmfao. His purple-looking eyes are so cool and his colorful hair as well, altho it's toned down.

Also. Loki. Loki is the youngest of them all, and he stands a bit more afar from them. He also looks so composed? Like he's new to the game, he's still not relaxed/confident enough to strike a more casual pose like the other coaches. I love this detail.

Back to Ego Jinpachi. I'm. [wolf tearing his shirt apart meme] LISTEN!!! LOOK AT HIM!!! The fact he is RIGHT BEHIND NOA. The fact he is the ONLY ONE not looking at the camera because he is not part of that world anymore. He doesn't play football anymore yet he's never given up on his sick sick dream. His jacket being a striking (lol) blue... ugh I love it. It's the only colorful note in the spread and it sits on the centre as well + they dulled everyone's colors for it to result more vibrant. Also not to be a yaoi lover but the black-white hair combination hits again ig.

Also. Also thinking about his volume cover. The four chains forcing him to sit on his chair. Makes me wonder how Ego may had been forced to leave football. There's still so much we don't know and UGH I need NEED to know what happened. Because now he's got horrible eating habits and is probably living driven by spite alone.

Anyway. I want to hear others' analysis on this!!!!!

[heyjudeb]

It Couple - Jude Bellingham

Summary: Jude and Y/N share a cute and affectionate moment on the red carpet Word Count: >1k Warnings: fluff, romantic moment The red carpet was a dazzling cascade of lights as celebrities and influencers made their grand entrances. Among them, Jude Bellingham and Y/N Y/L/N, the stunning Victoria's Secret model, stood out like a royal couple. Jude, dressed in a tailored black tuxedo that accentuated his athletic frame, exuded an aura of confidence and charm. Y/N, radiant in a custom-made Versace gown that hugged her curves perfectly, looked every bit the goddess she was often portrayed as on the runway. The gown, a deep emerald green, brought out the striking color of her eyes and contrasted beautifully with her cascading waves of chestnut hair. "You look stunning, baby." Jude said in her ear while keeping his hand on her waist constantly, tugging on it from time to time. "You're my best accessory, that's for sure." Y/N said giving him a kiss on the cheek. As they posed for photos, Jude kept his arm firmly around Y/N’s waist, pulling her closer every now and then. Each time their eyes met, their smiles grew, the connection between them clear to everyone watching. Jude’s subtle tugs at her waist were more than just for the cameras; they were a silent reassurance, a display of his affection. They moved down the carpet, Jude spotting a familiar face in the crowd. “Hey, mate!” he called out, giving his friend a quick hug and handshake.

Y/N continued down the carpet, her graceful walk turning heads. An interviewer approached her with a microphone. “Y/N, you look amazing tonight. Who are you wearing?”

“Thank you so much,” Y/N replied, her smile radiant. “I’m wearing Versace. They did an incredible job with this gown.” The interviewer nodded. “And how’s the event going for you so far?”

“It’s been fantastic. It’s great to see so many talented people here,” Y/N said, her eyes sparkling." So, I'm enjoying it very much?" "Where is your mister, Y/N?" the interviewer asked Y/N, smiling. Just then, Y/N felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist from behind. Jude gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, causing her to blush. Jude has no problem showing affection in front of the cameras, which is the opposite of Y/N. She's more reserved and shy, that's why Jude likes to put her in the spot and finds it very cute. "There he is" Y/N said resting her hands on his arms. “Ah, here’s Jude!” the interviewer exclaimed, turning her attention to him. “You two make such a beautiful couple. Can you tell us a bit about your relationship?”

Jude grinned and pulled away from Y/N, holding her hand. “Well, I have to say, it’s been a challenge. You know, trying to keep up with a supermodel,” he said, winking at Y/N. “But seriously, she’s amazing. I think we just balance each other out.” Y/N nodded at his words, looking in his eyes, admiring him. The interviewer smiled, then hesitated for a moment before asking, "There have been some rumors recently about you two possibly taking a break. Can you address those?"

Y/N's expression dropped slightly. She saw those rumors going around on social media and the comments of him being better off without her still affect her. But before she could respond, Jude squeezed her hand reassuringly and stepped in. “Oh, those rumors,” he said lightly, a charming smile on his face. “We hear them too, and we just laugh. I'm not going to let this beauty slip away from me that easily, so rest assured, everyone!” Y/N felt so happy and at ease once she heard these words coming from him. Obviously, she was sure about his feelings for her, but hearing him say those things openly with no regrets made her feel even more special.

"That's great to hear! May I ask shortly, how did you meet? I don't think you've shared that story in an interview before." The interview asked again, eager to get as much from them as possible. "Well, I don't think we shared, did we?" Y/N turned to Jude to ask him. "Nah, I don't think so," Jude replied, smiling. "We met at a charity event a couple of years ago. I saw her across the room and knew I had to talk to her. Best decision I ever made."

Y/N laughed softly, her eyes glowing with affection. "He was so nervous. It was adorable."

The interviewer beamed. “That’s a lovely story. What do you enjoy most about your relationship?”

Jude looked thoughtful. “I think it’s the way we support each other. We both have busy careers, but we always make time for each other.” Y/N nodded. “We also love having fun together. He makes me laugh every day.” The interviewer smiled warmly. “You two are truly inspiring. Thank you for sharing. Enjoy the rest of your evening.”

As they walked away, Jude leaned down and whispered in Y/N’s ear, “You’re amazing, you know that?”

Y/N blushed, her cheeks warming. “And you’re my favorite person,” she whispered back, her eyes full of love. They finally reached the end of the carpet, where a sleek black car waited to take them to the after-party. Inside, the atmosphere was cozy and private. Jude held Y/N’s hand, his thumb gently stroking her knuckles. “I’m so glad you’re here with me tonight,” he said sincerely.

Y/N leaned her head on his shoulder, feeling a deep sense of contentment. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be,” she replied softly.

[bitchslapblastoids]

I reeeeeeeeeally did not expect seeing the Vegas footage on that stage to impact me so much. Like yes, objectively hilarious that the footage is so lame, but when it finished and dan said “why are you crying? we warned you that it was horrible,” I was like NO BITCH. I’M CRYING BECAUSE LOOK AT YOUR SWEET DIMPLED FACE ON THAT SCREEN. LOOK AT YOU SO YOUNG AND TRYING SO HARD TO KEEP IT ALL TOGETHER. LOOK AT YOU TRYING TO KEEP UP WITH THE TREND BUT IT’S FUNDAMENTALLY NOT YOU, YOU’LL NEVER BE DAILY VLOGGERS AND THAT’S OKAY. Look at you now, in full radical beautiful acceptance of the fact that you are not mainstream, you will not keep up with the trends, you are too based for the GP, you are weird and wonderful and that’s okay because we found you and we’ll keep finding you and 10+ years on you’ll be so much happier for it.

And yeah you filmed yourself getting frappucinos and “mmm” was all phil had to say but guess what?? you’re going to get silly little coffee drinks all over the world with eachother and have silly little mundane reactions and it’ll still be something worth documenting. You’re going to figure it all out and you’re going to survive and 12 years later your audio is still going to be terrible and we’ll give you shit for it every time but we’ll still be here.

Your accents will converge and your eyes will be just as bright but they won’t be as wide or as skittish anymore they’ll have seeeeeeen shit and you’ll have learned how to cope and how to serve. You’ll take your hands out of your pockets and you’ll stop folding in on yourself. You’ll be bouncing around stages and striking poses in bright shiny clothes with bright shiny smiles and bright shiny hair and in love and in love and in love.

So yeah, I cried. Wouldn’t you?

[annewithaneofthegreengable]

Mr Long Legs and Ms Pocket Size

Summary: Toto loves that his girlfriend has to cling to him like a koala whenever she wants to kiss him. OR how Y/n has to constantly pull off the highest heels just to stand next to her “giant” boyfriend.

A/N: I will add a small smau right below so stay tuned u guys!

Toto and his girlfriend, who he lovingly calls his 'short stack,' wake up every day with a smile on their faces. They start their day with a kiss, normally she would have to hold onto him just to give him a peck on the lip. As they go about their morning routine, Toto can't help but grin as he watches her attempt to reach things on high shelves, which is often caused by him because he often teases her by placing things on the top shelf that are out of her reach, knowing she would have to call him for the help. 

“Damn you and your heights, who would put their everyday mugs on the highest place on the cupboard!”

“It’s not that high, Schatz. Look! It’s very much reachable. Well, compared to my size of course. Here you go.”

“New information, in case you don’t know… I am not your size”

“I’m pretty much aware of that, you are rather pocket-size, Liebe.”

His girlfriend playfully rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest.

"You know very well I'm not as tall as you, you oversized giant," she said with a hint of amusement. 

"But I guess being so towering has its downside. You're constantly losing things behind the cabinets and on top of the fridge. I suppose height isn't everything." Toto chuckled, wrapping his arm around her waist. 

"Height has its benefits, especially when it comes to pulling pranks on my short stack girl," he said while kissing her neck.

“Have you grown? Liebe.”

“Just for today, so pretty much yes.” Y/n grins then lifts her shoe high enough to reveal heels that make Toto’s jaw drop a little before he begins laughing hysterically. 

“Gotta pull off these bad bitches right here so that the press can take a picture with both of us without cutting your legs out of the frame.”

“There’s no way you’re gonna survive the whole day with those on.”

“Watch me! Toto.”

“Please! For the sake of me, just wear something flatter, like trainers, or your flats.”

“Nope.” She said with the sound pop “p”. 

Y/n is well aware that Toto enjoys the benefits of such a height gap, but it's enjoyable to tease him about being able to close the space on occasion.

"Shall we go?" Y/n asks making Toto sigh looking down at her feet again before nodding.

“If you ever feel any sort of discomfort please come to me right away. Yes? Liebe”

“Alright, Mr Long Legs”

Y/n confidently struts towards the door with Toto trailing behind her. As they step inside the paddock, they are immediately greeted by a swarm of press and fans clamouring to catch a glimpse of the famous couple. Toto watches in amazement as Y/n effortlessly strikes a series of poses, her confidence and poise perfectly fitting the larger-than-life persona she had adopted for the day. Despite her high heels, she didn't falter and instead embraced the spotlight with grace, leaving Toto in awe of her confidence and charisma. He also couldn't help but feel a little nervous at the idea of her wearing such high shoes all day, but his girlfriend was determined to make a statement. 

“Someone is a bit taller today?” Lewis said chuckling.

“Yes, Lewis. I’m even at your head level today. Still not quite George’s height but one step at a time, right?”

“Impressive… But I prefer the tiny boss to be tiny. Because those heels can break your toes or something.”

“It’s quite hurtful now but don’t you dare tell Toto. I’m trying to stay above a little longer today. Maybe till the race ends, then I will take it off.”

“Promise?”

“Swear on my toes, Lewis. Now get in the car. “

As Toto listened to Y/n's exchange with Lewis, he couldn't help but feel a pang of worry deep in his chest, with a little pang of jealousy as he heard Lewis make the comment about preferring her to be tiny, but he quickly pushed it aside. In his eyes, his girlfriend was perfect no matter her height. He knew how determined and fierce she could be, but the thought of her hurting herself in those towering shoes left him feeling uneasy. As Lewis walked away, Toto approached Y/n with a small frown, as he gently lifted her foot and carefully removed her heeled shoes, he couldn't help but notice the slight tension in her expression. He could tell she was disappointed that her attempt to be "taller" had come to an abrupt end. But he knew that her safety and well-being were his top priority, and he wasn't willing to risk her getting injured just for the sake of appearing taller. As he lowered her feet back to the ground, Toto looked up at her with a mixture of concern and affection "You know," he began, his tone tender, "you're perfect just the way you are, Liebe. Whether you're towering in those shoes or not." He gently ran a hand up her slender leg, his touch affectionate. "I don't care one bit about your height. I just want you to be safe and comfortable. That's all that matters to me."

Y/n couldn't help but soften at Toto's words, her disappointment at having to remove the heels fading in the warm glow of his affection. "I know," she replied, a small smile playing at the corners of her mouth. She reached down to brush a stray lock of hair out of his eyes, her touch gentle. "I just wanted to stand a bit taller for a change, you know? But I understand where you're coming from." She gave him a grin. "Next time, perhaps I will try on some wedges platform?”

liked by mercedesamgf1, lewishamilton, georgerussell63 and others

y/n_user: Can someone tell him to give me some of his height?

mercedesamgf1 we will try tiny boss

y/n_user Thanks admin! I appreciate ur help lewishamilton Can u tell him to save some for me also! Much needed it y/n_user Go find ur own! This is mine already

user_1 Mrs Long Legs now

user_2 Those shoes could kill

user_3 Can u save some for Yuki too

y/n_user Noted user_4 Tell Yuki to take it from his bf gasly

lilymhe Pretty heels for ma wifey

y/n_user Stop it wifey they're killlinggg meee lilymhe U can always sit on my lap wifey mercedesamgf1 Please stop calling my missus your wifey - toto user_1 the boss has joined the chat mic drop

user_5 Not toto using the company acc

liked by mercedesamgf1, lewishamilton, georgerussell63 and others

y/n_user photo dump and date night with my Mr Long Legs and he calls me his Ms Pocket Size so screw the heels

user_2 She looks so good!

user_3 THEY ARE THE POWER COUPLE!!

user_1 Dear mr future husband pls take note

lilymhe love you beautiful!

user_6 ATE and left NO CRUMBS

lewishamilton gorgeous - toto wolff

lewishamilton i don’t have instagram - toto wolff

y/n_user pls give lewis his ig acc back old man!

user: nOt the sign off by toto himself 😭😭

mercedesamgf1: finest couple ever! 😮‍💨

user admin— you’re so real for this omg user admin knows what’s up user can toto fight? user can’t fight for a championship that’s for sure

mercedesamgf1 the boss says you’re gorgeous

user GIVE THIS PERSON A RAISE FOR THEIR HARD WORK mercedesamgf1 so true

[fantasyinallforms]

Oh yeah, I think it's time to talk about Thorin's introduction scene in the first Hobbit movie because I've never seen a man fall in love so quickly. Now, first off, they really build up who Thorin is with the dramatics of everyone stopping when he knocks and Gandalf saying, "He's here." Then, we cut to the actual opening of the door. See the GIF below.

Few things here. First, look at that confidence and swagger. Did he have to strike a pose when the door was opened? No, but he did because Thorin Oakenshield is nothing if not dramatic. He is also not blushing, nor does he look even vaguely surprised, just smirk and swagger. It's important to note he has not seen Bilbo at all yet. It's also important to note that in the next few seconds, he doesn't actually see Bilbo.

Look at these GIFs. My man is doing anything but looking at Bilbo. He can hear Bilbo. He's fixing his coat and smiling at Kili. The movie makes it explicitly clear when the first time he gets a good look at Bilbo is. Take a look.

Did you see it? The exact moment that he actually saw Bilbo. It's hard to miss, given his eyes grow like three times, and his pupils explode, but let's watch it in slow-mo and zoomed in anyway.

His whole mouth is hanging open like a caught fish. This is the closest to immediate heart eyes I have seen in my life. He's even blushing! Go look at his cheeks in the first gif compared to this one. He looks like he just found the meaning of happiness. It doesn't even stop there because the next bit is just as fun.

Thorin takes a full step forward like he's being yanked by a chain, and the look on his face isn't just curiosity he's starstruck. That's a genuine twinkle in those deep blues. Now don't get me wrong, Thorin goes on to insult Bilbo and dismiss him outright. What can I say, he's smoop, but he's about as emotionally constipated as it gets. Those insults, however, are a secondary reaction. It's very hard to fake a first reaction to something you're not expecting, and Gandalf told Thorin basically nothing about their soon-to-be burglar. This was his first genuine reaction to Bilbo, and it sets the stage for every interaction after it because if Thorin Oakenshield struggles with one thing from this point forward, it's keeping his eyes off of Bilbo Baggins.

~~~

More deep dives like this can be found by searching the pinned tag #deep dive on my page ❤️

[seospicybin]

TOO HOT TO HANDLE.

PART III

Hyunjin x reader. (s)

Too Hot To Handle Masterlist

Synopsis: You and Hyunjin become contestants in a reality dating show, Too Hot To Handle. (14k words)

Author's note: Feel free to vent in my inbox once you finished reading it :)

LANA: In order to test how committed my guests are to the process, I call for help from my former retreat guests: Felix, Chris, and Avery. Their mission is to entice them to find out if they're capable of following the rules outside the retreat.

-

Everyone is going around exchanging hugs and cheek kisses while telling each other's names.

You only remember it now, the name of the girl, it's Avery and she looks like a Malibu Barbie with an Australian accent.

When it's your turn to hug Chris, you have to actively tell your brain to stay calm and not think about how you have a secret crush on him.

"Chris," he introduces himself, opening his arm for a friendly hug.

It's a good thing that he's not shirtless or else, you'd be drooling by now but those big biceps are quite distracting.

"Hi, Chris," you manage to sound coy saying it.

You catch a whiff of his perfume as you exchange a hug and Gosh, he smells amazing. You're staggering as you walk backward to be with everyone else.

"The three of you are Australians," Edie innocently says.

"We' are Australia's sexiest export since... ever," Felix jokingly says then breaks into laughter.

Even his laugh is so attractive, It's sonorous and infectious, inviting you to laugh along with him.

"We came back because we learned so much on the previous seasons that we came to pass the lesson on to you," Avery says, then she glances at the guys standing on each side of her, "Right, guys?"

Felix puts his hand against his waist and puts all of his weight to one side like he's striking a pose in a photo shoot.

"Well, yeah," he says with his nose scrunched, "but also we came here to show you guys how to have fun!"

Chris pops open the bottle of champagne on cue, sending the content spurting out of it and he hurriedly takes a chug to stop it from spilling.

It's unfair how Chris can easily make you feel the slightest bit hot and bothered, just standing there with that wine dripping down his chin. You lick your lips while imagining licking the wine on his veiny neck.

Realizing that you're in the presence of other people, you hurriedly snap yourself out of it.

"Wait, wait, it's not fair that there's three of us and five of them," Avery says while adorably crossing her arms in front of her.

Felix puts his arm around her and brightly smiles, "Don't worry, we'll make it even," he says.

Your head starts looking around the boat, anticipating something and perhaps, anyone's arrival based on what Felix said.

"Give a warm welcome to the two new arrivals!" Avery cheerily announces.

With Lana, it can't be just a boat party, you can tell that she threw this party for certain purposes other than to introduce the new arrivals.

It's wise that you keep cautious with whatever you're doing at this party. You don't want to mess with either Lana or the money, and you surely don't want to mess it up with Hyunjin.

The new arrivals are looking hot and heavy, ready to fuck everybody. The girl is a gorgeous blonde with big, blue eyes named Emile and the guy is a Brazilian man with a chest tattoo, Gustav.

With Chris tirelessly filling the glass and Felix distributing it to everyone, they make sure everyone holds a drink in their hands and is ready for a toast.

"Cheers!" Everyone says in unison, raising their champagne flutes in the air before taking a sip of it.

Things get crazy whenever alcohol is involved so to be safe, you moderately drink your wine and sip as little as possible.

"Okay now we each choose someone to do a body shot with," Felix suggests an icebreaker to fully kickstart the party.

Avery is the one who enthusiastically welcomed that idea and she starts looking for someone to do it with. The boys must be buzzing and whoever gets chosen, he's lucky as hell.

"You," Avery says, pointing in your direction.

You look to the side at Edouard and elbow his side to make him aware of this one-of-a-kind offer.

"No. You," Avery says, talking to you.

Aghast, you unconsciously point at yourself and ask her back to confirm, "Me?"

Avery laughs at the way you reacted, "Come here, my darling," she puts away her drink, then holds her hand out at you.

Half disoriented, you reach for her hand and she makes you sit on the wooden floor with colorful cushions strewn around for people to lay about.

"Now, lay down," she instructs you.

Somehow, you find yourself obeying her words and putting yourself in a compromising position. You rest your head on your pillow and try to stay calm even though everyone is looking at you.

Avery grabs a glass of shot in her hand and she puts all of her hair away on one shoulder, she smiles as she lifts the shot before dripping it onto your chest.

"Oh, my gosh!" You shakily gasp the second the liquid makes contact with your skin, making you shiver from the cold.

But that's the least of the things you should be surprised by. Avery then leans down while keeping her hair down on her shoulder and drinks the puddle of alcohol gathered on the valley of your breasts.

Avery lands a long lick down your front, her tongue feels slick and hot on your skin, making you grip the cushion and try so hard not to squeal.

She seems to enjoy doing it and everyone else can only watch it with envy in their eyes. The laugh she lets out as she lifts her head confirms it.

"Now that's how you start a party!" Edouard says.

Without having to look, you know you're flustered and your hands fly to cover your face, embarrassed. Also, you must admit it gets you a little aroused as well and the party has only started.

-

YOU: In the middle of the sea, on a boat with these sexy, horny people and plenty of booze... [exhales] That's the recipe for chaos.

-

Hyunjin's head is all over the place. He can't stay still and when he finally does, all sorts of thoughts go through his head and they're all not helping him relax.

And he can't help but wonder is this how you felt when he was going on that date with Saskia?

He'll take it as his karma then but he's not the only one feeling restless, the others who are in couples are going through the same things but have different ways of handling it.

Andy, however, is not taking it well. He's going through five stages of grief around the villa.

"When I went on that date with Edie she made it clear that she only wanted to be friends and that she wanted to connect with someone else," Andy croons while tugging his blond hair.

Hyunjin nods to let him know that he's listening to his rant but has nothing to respond to that.

"I think it'll be good for her to connect with someone else," he says with a nonchalant shrug.

That would be nice of him to think so because Hyunjin could never think that way, he wants you to be happy but God, he'd hate to lose you to someone else.

Andy plops onto the lounger next to him and roughly runs his hands through his hair.

"I've already detached myself from her and I feel bad for still wanting to be with her," he grumbles.

"We've all been there," Hyunjin says, trying to sympathize with him.

Hyunjin almost forgot about that part where Andy broke up with Edie. Even though they're no longer a couple now, you can just detach yourself from people but the feelings, they're pretty much still intact.

It's even harder in the villa because the person is there and you have to deal with it face to face.

God, Hyunjin hopes he doesn't need to go through that much pain.

-

HYUNJIN: [Breathing deeply]

-

The boat party is in full swing.

Felix is making sure everyone's glass is filled, Avery is floating around with her wide, bright smile and Chris is playing some party music on his small DJ set-up.

So far so good, no one has broken the rules yet but 'yet' is the keyword here, you get the feeling that it's only about time until someone caves in, and when that happens, it will trigger a chain reaction.

You decide to sit this one out and watch the party from the side, avoiding any potential risk that would lead you to break the rules.

You're quietly sipping your wine while sitting against the big cushion and enjoying the nice, warm sea breeze when the temptation comes over to you carrying a bottle of champagne.

It's hard not to smile whenever he's around and he's smiling at you.

"Do you mind if I join you?" Chris asks.

"Not at all," you reply, scooting a little to the side to make space for him.

"Let me refill it for you," he says, offering to fill your glass with more wine.

In return, you take the bottle from him and fill his glass for him, having a toast to finally have a sip together. He's sitting so close to you, that you can feel your arms brushing together from the slightest of movement.

He looks out at the view of the sun that is slowly sinking into the horizon and delightfully sighs. Then he turns his head at you and asks you something that you're not ready to answer.

"Would you kiss anyone here?"

Well, there is someone you would like to kiss but he's off-limits.

"Oh, I would love to but uh..." you break into a laugh as your eyes meet his.

Chris licks his lips after sipping his wine, "Are you worried about the rules?"

Not the main reason why but yeah, that's one of the reasons. You chuckle and answer, "I've spent a lot of money already."

He cracks a laugh and his dimples appear on his cheeks, "Been there, done that."

As someone who went through this before, you're sure he knows how it felt because there's no other reason why he laughed.

"So, tell me about this guy you've spent a lot of money with," he asks.

You contemplate for a moment how much can you tell but since he's someone from outside of this retreat and went through the same thing, maybe he can give you some insights.

"Well, he kind of messed up a while ago actually," you share with him.

"Ouch!" He exclaims.

"But I found myself still liking him despite all of that," you continue, sipping your wine in between sentences, "It's actually scared me because I think I've lost my head a little."

It's been gnawing inside you, how you doubt Hyunjin will be the right one for you as you get haunted by this fear that he'll make the same mistake again.

Chris holds his drink in the other hand and slightly turns his body to face you, "Maybe losing your head means you're maybe in your heart," he warmly tells you.

You smile hearing his words and you really wish they're true, you're having this doubt because you want this to be something genuine.

"That's what I hope," he adds with a smile.

"Thank you, Chris," you sincerely tell him, clinking your glass with him for another toast.

When you said it's only about time, well, the time is here. As you look around for another bottle of wine, you see Edie and the new guy going at each other's faces like animals in heat.

But that's the least of your worries. When you turn your head the other way, you see Edouard doing body shots on Saskia.

It's not only about the money now, but also loyalty and friendships. You drain your wine glass empty and gasp, "We're fucked!"

-

YOU: They forgot everything! They forgot about the purpose, forgot about Lana, forgot about everyone.

-

Hyunjin can hardly think of anything when you haven't returned on dinnertime. He barely eats his food, he tries shoving a few spoonfuls but has a hard time swallowing them down.

"I'm not hungry," he says, pushing the plate away from him.

"Your plate is still full," Frida says, her voice tinted with concern.

He reclines in his seat and sighs, "I'm too tense."

"I know how you feel," Vic says as she's also waiting for Edouard to return.

Andy pats his shoulder and with a mouth full of food says, "At least you're not worrying someone who doesn't want to be with you."

Well, that's a way to look at the brighter side of things.

The longer you're away from him, the more he worries and his worries affect other people in the vicinity as well. However, there's one person in particular who is having fun in this situation.

"If Edouard kissed someone, would you be pissed?" Diego asks Vic who's sitting cross-legged on the single sofa on the terrace.

"Depends on who he did it with," she answers while picking at her nails.

"If he kissed Saskia, would you be pissed?"

"Very," she answers without a beat.

That gets Hyunjin more alerted, because what if you kissed someone? You know, like out of curiosity? Speaking of experience, he almost did it once with Saskia.

"Do you think they might do something?" Hyunjin nervously asks.

"What do you think?" Diego tosses the question at Vic.

"If I know him like I think I do, I think he won't kiss anyone," she diplomatically answers.

Hyunjin doesn't know how she's doing it but he must admire Vic's patience and calmness in handling this.

"They won't do anything," Andy says, perhaps still stuck in the denial phase.

"If I were with someone here and I went there, and people started kissing each other, I'd probably do it," Diego is here to fuel more gas into the fire.

Frida grabs him by the knee and makes him listen to her, "It is something that I won't do to you because not only it would affect us, but also my friendship with her."

That seems to work on putting some sense into Diego and makes him stop talking altogether.

Hyunjin always thinks highly of you, he knows you wouldn't throw away what the two of you have built together, and that gets him a little hopeful.

"I bet my ass they're doing stuff," Vic remarks out of the blue.

Hyunjin doesn't expect this change of mood, she seems to have reached her limit and can't keep her composure anymore.

Andy sighs and leans back on the sofa, playing with the cushion on his lap, twirling it in the air a couple of times.

"There's a lot at stake today. Relationships, friendships, the house, the money..." he pauses to turn his head to the side to look at Vic, "...Vic's ass."

Everyone laughs at that and it helps to lighten up the mood, the only one who doesn't take it well is Vic.

"Fuck you!" She curses while laughing, hurling a cushion at Andy.

-

HYUNJIN: I hope for the best. But I also expect for the worst [blows air]

-

"Okay, honestly, but there is one person I'd like to kiss here," you suddenly share.

That gets Chris' eyebrow raised in curiosity, "Yeah. Who is it?"

You look him right in the eyes and answer, "I'm looking right at him."

He closes his eyes and grins, from the way his ear reddening you can tell he gets shy from what you said which is why you said that in the first place. That, and because of alcohol.

"But I know you're engaged and all," you quickly add.

He grins wider, and he looks so cute and shy like that, if he weren't off-limits, your head would definitely take a hard turn.

"I may be bad but I'm not that bad," you further explain, giggling along with him.

"So, not because of the guy you broke rules with?"

That catches you off guard and you laugh in embarrassment, "Well, yeah, that too."

"In that order?" He asks again, bumping his shoulder against you.

"Exactly in that order. You then him," you jokingly say.

This time, his cheeks get all red and his dimples sunken deeper into his cheeks as he keeps grinning.

"Guys, let's swim!" Felix shouts at both of you.

To be honest, you feel comfortable sharing the space with Chris and want to stay in it a bit longer. You shake your head and kindly refuse his offer.

"No, I'm good," you tell him.

The screams and squeals of the girls jumping into the water startle you, more so, because they ditch their bikinis.

"Oh, come on!" Felix grumbles, coming over to you and taking you by the hand.

"You're coming too," he shouts at Chris.

He's forcing you to get up and join him, taking you by the end of the edge of the deck. Since everyone is going in anyway, you have no option but to follow suit but decide to keep your bikini on.

"Wait, wait, I have to take this..." you tell him, untying the outerwear you're wearing.

"I'll help you," Chris says, helping you to take it off of you.

You're shivering as his hands brush the skin on your back but it's nothing compared to when he's taking his top off. You don't think this moment will come but here you are, looking at his body in its glory with the golden rays of the sun hitting him just right.

Impatient, Felix gets ahead and jumps into the sea while shouting some gibberish words out loud.

"Do it together, yeah?" He offers.

"Yeah, okay," you nervous answers.

He holds his hand out at you and you take it without hesitating, he counts from three, and on one, you both jump into the water together.

Everyone is having fun, you see Pablo is going at it with the new girl and Edie is simply having the time of her life. She squeal when she finally acknowledges your presence, waddling her way to you and clinging to you.

"Did you see me kissing him?" she whines,

"You mean sucking his soul out?" You joke.

"I didn't know how many times I kissed him," she whines again, putting her hands around you.

"Don't worry. Lana will know," you tell her.

For this once, you don't want to think of the money. You let yourself enjoy it, this moment and the company you're with, and also the beautiful view of the sunset.

-

YOU: I must admit, I had a lot of fun. I really needed that party.

-

Everyone is already waiting in the cabana for your return from the boat party.

You don't know why you're nervous, maybe it's coming from knowing everything that happened at the boat party and you came back with your hair and bikini damp from swimming.

Since there's no space left, you take the remaining spot that is on the far end of the sofa, sitting far away from Hyunjin.

Lana chimes in not long after everyone has settled down.

"Welcome back," She greets everyone who just came back from the boat party, "And welcome to the two new arrivals."

No one seems to realize the new additions to the retreat until Lana mentions them.

"Thank you, Lana," Emilie says with a smile.

"To test your growth, I prepared a party on a boat with the illustrious presence of some of my former retreat guests: Felix, Avery, and Chris," Lana informs.

Frida reacts with a loud gasp, "Really?"

"Yeah. It was so nice to meet them," Edie answers.

"You had no idea. It was awesome," Saskia adds, making her more envious.

"Damn!" Andy quietly curses next to Hyunjin.

Which makes you glance at Hyunjin and he seems a little tense, his jaws are all clenched yet it makes him more attractive.

"As soon as you left for the party, your friends had to choose whether or not to bet on your loyalty to the principles of the retreat."

A scoff slips out of you because your guess is right, you're not new to Lana's hidden agenda, the boat party was a test and you may not broken any rules but you failed nonetheless.

"We can double the prize money you know," Diego says, "All you had to do was to not break any rules."

"Oh, no..." Saskia cringes.

"What did you bet?" You ask, feeling a little anxious if they choose to bet all of the money.

"We bet to put our trust in you," Andy answers.

And that's where you failed, you could have prevented anyone from breaking the rules but you let them happen.

-

YOU: I never thought that they would bet double, that we weren't going to do anything.

-

Hyunjin is nervous, anxious even but when he finally sees you coming, he feels so relieved. Now that you're back, a new question pops in his head: did you break any rules?

His faith wavers a little as he notices that your bikini is damp and so is your hair, and you sit on the far end of the sofa. He doesn't even dare to ask and waits for someone else to do it for him.

"It's a good time to tell us if you broke any rules," Andy says, taking the role to ask the big question.

Edie's hand raised in the air and the sheer smile on Andy's face falters, "I broke the rules. I kissed Gustav," she admits right away.

"We kissed, yes," the new guy, Gustav, confirms with a sly grin.

"I thought the rules didn't apply outside the retreat," Edie innocently says in an effort to defend her rule break.

"Felix and Chris, and uh... Avery, they were encouraging us to break rules, saying that Lana wasn't there," Saskia delivers a weak argument.

Hyunjin is getting more tense with every detail of the boat party getting exposed in this heated argument.

"We held back at first," Edie calmly remarks.

"But you did give in," Remy says, easily diminishing her remark.

"I regret to inform you that many rule breaks were detected," Lana spoils another detail.

"I thought it was only the two of you," Marie says, pointing at Edie and Gustav, "Was there someone else?"

Hyunjin looks around and deeply hopes that he doesn't see your hand raised in the air, he sees Pablo's hand instead.

"Emilie and I kissed," he admits a little too late.

"They threw away kisses," Andy sighs while pinching the bridge of his nose in distress.

Pablo tries to throw the blame back at Edie, "She kissed a lot."

"Everyone did body shots," Edie reveals another detail and her hand flies in your direction.

"I only did one body shot," you defend yourself, "And I don't think that counts."

Hyunjin is fine with body shots, he has done it a couple of times during parties but his concern is who you did it with.

"We also went skinny dipping," Edouard reveals another thing.

And now skinny dipping? He's so wrong to think that you won't do anything, he slumps in his seat, disappointed.

Frida groans out loud, also slumping in her seat.

"Lana, give us the bill!" Diego says, no longer enjoying this.

"Fuck! It's going to be bad, it's double," Andy says in distress.

It takes Lana a moment to calculate the rule breaks and finally comes up with the final result, "All of these rule breaks have cost the group $72,000."

A minute passes in eerie silence as everyone tries to process how much money have lost at that boat party. There were only five people invited and yet they were capable of spending that much money.

"It must have been awesome being there," Marie sneers with a scowl.

"Of course it was," Pablo unapologetically says, being insensitive to his surroundings.

"The prize fund now stands at $60,000," Lana updates the current prize fund.

There's not much money left and with the new guest, he can't guarantee that it'll stay on that amount for long.

"You have the opportunity to develop and learn to connect. Don't take the process for granted," Lana concludes the session with a warning.

-

HYUNJIN: We are paying the price for something that wasn't our fault. All I can do is laugh.

-

It's close to bedtime and you head straight to the dressing room to take a quick shower and put on a pair of comfortable clothes of camisole and white shorts.

You're not purposely avoiding Hyunjin because at some point you'll have to talk to him, you merely give yourself and him some time to process what happened at the cabana earlier.

As you're doing your skincare routine, you see him entering the dressing room with an apparent scowl on his face and you take this as a cue to talk to him.

As he walks past your chair, you grab him by the hand and look up at him, "Hey, let's talk."

He rather seems reluctant to your invite but you don't want to wait anymore, it's a great time to have a talk since the two of you are alone in the dressing room.

You pat the chair next to you where Edie usually sits, "Come, sit here!"

He obeys you without saying anything, sitting facing you and letting you hold his hand on his lap. You have told everything about the boat party but you know you have to assure him that there's nothing else happened other than that.

"What happened at the boat party, I've already said everything that I did. I only did a body shot and nothing else," you tell him, keeping your tone soft and calm.

He gets quiet for a moment and it's his turn to speak so you wait for him to say anything, rubbing the back of his hand with your thumb.

He slightly slumps on the chair, sending his long legs spreading open in front of you and you know it's not the time for it but you feel tempted to tease him.

"We were all talking about all of you and the things you probably do there," he says.

You let go of his hand and rest your hand on his thigh all the while your eyes are looking at him, "Yeah?"

"I said if it were me, I wouldn't do that because one, out of respect for you and what we have."

Based on experience, you doubt that his act would match his words but you give him the chance to finish his talk.

"Two, for the group," he continues.

He makes it sound like you are this selfish person who does things as she pleases and you don't care about him at all when in fact, you did nothing on that boat party except for that one bodyshot with Avery.

"It wasn't intentional, someone chose to do it with me," you tell him the reason why you did it, not because you wanted to.

"I'm just—" he abruptly stops talking as if he has a change of mind in the middle of a sentence.

"I know what I feel for you and it's just that I can't act like that I'm okay with what you did," he explains.

You retract your hand off of him and grip the edge of your chair, "I told you, I only did one body shot and nothing else."

"You wouldn't like it if I did it," he hastily replies, almost losing himself there as he gives you an intense glare.

You hate to sleep without resolving it but it's obvious that he's angry so it's best to give him time to cool down and you can talk it all out with clear heads the next day.

-

YOU: He almost kissed another girl on a date and what makes him think that he won't do anything at that boat party? [Scoffs]

-

It's when you wake up that you realize that some people were switching beds last night.

Vic is sleeping with Marie while Edouard sleeps with Andy so you guess she already knew about what happened between Edouard and Saskia. At least, she knew it from Edouard himself and not from someone else.

As for you, you're not going into the talk yet. You still cuddle him and give him a morning kiss, you treat him like usual to let him know that nothing changed between you and him. This is just another thing you need to overcome together and deep down, you know you will.

The morning continues with a mumbling mess that is Vic at the breakfast table.

"I'm only going to try again if he can actually win me over," she says, stirring the scrambled egg on her plate with a fork.

You don't have the energy to deal with drama first thing in the morning so you decide not to meddle and risk saying things that upset her more.

"Then let him win you over," Marie from two chairs over tells her.

"I don't think he understands that he really needs to do the work to win me back," Vic grumbles again, dropping her fork onto her plate.

"So tell him," Marie coyly responds.

Vic sighs and runs her hands through his dark long hair, "But I know I'm never going to work things out with Saskia."

You know it's better not to stay away from it but you can't help it when your friends are going against each other, especially over a boy.

You put down your cutlery and look at Vic, "Vic, I think that you're a grown woman, and whether you want to or not, you should work things out with her."

She subtly rolls her eyes in response, not taking your words when it's possible to do so if one of them is open to reconciliation.

"You could figure this out together," you assure her.

"I am not going to talk to this girl. If she wants to talk to me which she won't then I'll talk to her. But she won't," Vic says with her nostrils flaring in anger.

It's obvious that Vic is not open to reconciliation, moreover, it's tricky considering that she has stubbornness in her. Then there's nothing left to do but tell her which side you're taking and it's neither.

"I just want you to understand that I love you and I also like talking to her. I don't want you to think that I'm two-faced," you carefully explain not avoid getting your words twisted.

"I just want everything to be fine because I like you both a lot," you add.

In the afternoon, Lana called everyone to the cabana as usual and she prepared something for everyone there. There's a TV with the word 'Cinelana' on the screen.

"Cinelana?" Edie says in genuine confusion.

Marie puts all of her hair to the side before taking a seat, "Will it be...?" She wildly guessed with a raised eyebrow.

Not long after everyone has taken their seats, the melodic chime comes and the cone lights up to signify Lana's arrival.

"Hello, everyone."

"Hi, Lana!" Everyone replies in unison.

"How are you?" Lana asks.

"Poor," Frida shortly replies.

"Broke and scared," Saskia answers.

To be honest, you feel more scared than broke. Maybe it's coming from knowing that you didn't contribute to that money deduction.

"From what I can see from your behavior, some forms of physical contact can be more sexual than those prohibited at the retreat," Lana says.

You have a feeling that she's about to expose everyone with this Cinelana and that's what you're scared of.

"But it's better to show than tell."

-

YOU: I have no problem showing everything that happened. Showing the thing I did is fine by me. But when it comes to the others, I don't know.

-

"I want you to see yourselves through my eyes."

The ones who went to the boat party seem to be nervous and everyone pretty much knows what Lana is about to show. Hyunjin can only hope that he doesn't see what he doesn't want to see.

"What is she going to show?" Diego curiously asks.

"Is there popcorn?" Marie casually asks.

"May the first session of Cinelana begin," Lana announces.

Cinelana starts with them having a big toast and from there, things escalate quickly, everyone reacts with a lot of gasps and squeals, cheering when they catch someone doing the rule break.

Hyunjin's heart skips a beat when you come on the screen, a girl pours a drink onto your chest and proceeds to drink it straight from it. He sees that you cover your face with your hands, looking flustered.

He feels a little jealous but not the kind that makes him angry, It's the kind that makes him envy. It's even crazier that he doesn't which one he should be more jealous of, the girl who did the body shot on you or you.

"Calm down. This is just the beginning," you tell everyone.

It suddenly turns quiet when the footage of Saskia and Edouard doing body shots on each other. Hyunjin can't help but look to the side, at Vic who looks uncomfortable and displeased with what she's seeing.

Thankfully, the attention is shifted to Edie who's devouring the new guy with ferocious kisses that get everyone hysterically screaming.

"Wow. Edie!" Diego clicks his tongue at her.

The movie ends with them going into the sea naked and Hyunjin is relieved to see that you told the truth to him, in fact, he should be proud that you stick to the principles even though everyone around you doing the opposite.

"And that's why we're poor," Marie comments as the screen turns dark.

Lana chimes once more, "What do you think about the movie?"

"I liked it, Lana," Pablo jokingly says.

"Do you think this behavior is fair to the group? Would anyone act differently?" Lana asks.

That seems to make everyone turn quiet again, offending the ones who went to the boat party. He turns to the side and sees that you open your mouth to speak.

"For me personally, when I got on that boat, that's when it stopped making sense to me. I realize that I would much rather be here than be there," you say.

You turn your head at him and smile, an unexpected gesture that makes him feel touched. All of a sudden, he doesn't know why he's mad in the first place, you've told him the truth and that should be enough for him.

"I think I'd have acted differently if I knew how much it would affect some people here," Edouard adds with a defeated look on his face.

"Now is the time to think about how are you going to move forward. I really hope you try harder," Lana says.

In other words, Lana demands everyone to do better from this moment on. Hyunjin figures that he should do better too in building this connection with you, he doubted you when he should have trusted you just like you trust him.

"That's all for today," Lana concludes the session.

Now is the time to pick up the conversation from last night. He takes you to the firepit to get some privacy so the two of you can talk comfortably.

"So, what do you think?" You ask, folding your legs on the sofa facing him.

Hyunjin cracks a smile and answers, "I can't even be mad at that. That was so hot."

You burst out laughing and playfully hit his chest, he catches your hand to stop you, pulling you onto his lap. He looks up at you and brushes your hair to the side, "I think I was made because you were gone the whole day," he honestly admits.

A smile rises on your face, "You missed me?"

"So much," he shamelessly answers.

"You're so into me, mmh?" You ask, putting your forehead against his.

"I'm so into you," he shortly replies, ignoring how stupid he sounded.

"Me too," you tell him with your hand cupping his jaw, "I'm so into you."

It's one of those moments that Hyunjin wishes he could freely kiss you just to prove his words to you with actions and it stresses him that he can't do that.

As if you read his mind, you land a soft kiss on his nose to compensate for not being able to kiss his lips and smile when you pull away. It doesn't quite satisfy his needs but it's enough to make his heart pitter-pattering inside his chest.

"We're even now," he jokingly says.

You hit his chest again a little harder this time, "Excuse me? This was different!" You strongly disagree.

He laughs and pulls you closer, what he did that time with Saskia is far worse than someone doing a body shot on you. He nods and immediately agrees with you.

"Okay, okay, but you owe me a body shot," he says, trying to get something out of it.

"That's fair," you agree to it.

-

HYUNJIN: My honest reaction? I liked the movie. It's better than I thought [chuckles]

-

The drama between Vic, Edouard, and Saskia continues onto the next day.

It gets even messier when the girls are doing makeup in the dressing room, it was a nice and quiet afternoon until Vic starts a fight, unprovoked.

"Do you think Edouard was hitting on her?" She asks you, fully aware that Saskia is there on the opposite side of the vanity table, curling her hair in peace.

Hearing that she is being indirectly addressed, Saskia puts down her curling iron and looks at Vic.

"No, he wasn't hitting on me, Vic. It's not like that," she tells him.

Vic acts nonchalantly, she continues putting foundation on her face as she talks, "Then what was it like?"

"He wasn't hitting on me and I wasn't hitting on him either," Saskia remarks.

"If you were hitting on him, then I have a problem with that," Vic argues more instead of dropping the conversation there.

"You think I hit on him? For God's sake, Victoria, don't be silly!" Saskia says with a sarcastic scoff.

The fact that Saskia addresses Vic by her full name only means that she has struck her nerves.

"No, I mean it," Vic keeps arguing.

You hate to get caught in the middle of the conflict so does everyone else on the vanity table but to meddle in is not the best option either.

'Yeah, keep believing that men are so honest. Men always talk their way out of things and the woman is the slut, the woman is the whore," Saskia says, still managing to curl her hair despite being in the middle of an argument.

Vic roughly puts down her makeup brush onto the table with a clang, "But if you led him on—"

Saskia cuts her off to defend herself, "Everyone was drinking, and when you drink—"

And Vic cuts her off midsentence in return, "You led him to believe you wanted him."

Saskia scoffs again and stops doing things altogether, "Oh, so you mean I can't drink? I can't get excited. I can't have fun at a party?"

You grab Vic's hand to stop her from keeping going and escalate things further, filling the room with palpable animosity. You don't want to be seen as taking anyone's side but no one is trying to stop them from coming at each other and turning it into a whole fight.

Looking around for help, you have no one to turn to but the cone perched on the shelf in the dressing room. Before you can ask for help, she chimes in.

Things are getting out of hand that Lana has to intervene, she gathers the three in the bedroom to talk and hopefully, they get to work it out together.

Since there's a party tonight, you continue doing your makeup with the rest of the girls while hoping for the best outcome for the three of them.

You still feel a little tense from being caught in the middle of conflict and Hyunjin seems to notice it. He comes from behind you, putting all of your hair away to the side so he can kiss your neck.

With his hand wrapped around your neck to keep you still, he gently sucking on the skin. You're squealing as he keeps placing ticklish kisses along your shoulder blade.

"Oh, I'm jealous," says the new girl, Emilie.

Somehow, it feels good to know that your relationship is making someone jealous. Hyunjin places another kiss on your cheek before leaving for the bathroom.

"Let's be a throuple," Emilie says as she sits on Saskia's chair.

"A sincere relationship with three people," she explains as if you don't know what it means.

You almost broke up with him when you knew he almost kissed another girl and what makes her think that you'll be okay sharing Hyunjin with her? You give her a pass because she's new so you awkwardly chuckle in response.

-

YOU: Back off, girl. I'm not into this throuple business.

-

It's a real party when everyone is getting along well and having fun.

The talk seems to be a success with Vic looking so much better, she's back to her chipper mood and she's dancing with Edouard. On the other hand, you sense that things between her and Saskia are not doing that well but at least, they're staying civil to each other now.

Putting drama aside, you and Hyunjin are doing better than ever. You trust each other more now and your connection is getting stronger, the next plan is to show true growth in your relationship to earn a green light.

Hyunjin hoists you against his body until your feet are off the ground, you hurriedly cling to him by putting your arms around his shoulders and your legs around his waist.

"Is this how we're going to do it?" You jokingly ask with a sly grin on your face and your hand massages the nape of his neck.

"In front of everybody? Yeah, that's the idea," he playfully responds.

The fun time has to end with Lana being a party pooper as usual. Everyone knows what to do when the chime comes, heading to the cabana like animals about to get slaughtered. Considering that she crashed the party, she'd better have some good news for the group.

"Hi, Lana. Do you have another movie?" Diego jokingly asks.

"Do you want her to show yours?" Edie pokes fun at him.

Lana skips the casual greeting and goes straight into the talk, you hate whenever that happens because it means she's not pleased with something. But everyone has been behaving well, especially after that huge blow to the prize money at the boat party.

"I see how you talk a lot about finding a connection but I also see that some of you do little about it," Lana says.

There's still hope that this going to turn out well and you cling to that hope.

"Connecting is not necessarily trying to be a couple, but opening up to the process and being aware that mistakes are part of any learning process."

Everyone stays quiet, no one is saying anything but intently listening to what Lana says to know where this talk leads.

"Getting it wrong is one thing. Giving up on the process is another. And that can no longer continue to happen here on my retreat."

"Y-yeah?" Edie stammers, sensing that Lana is onto something, something unpleasant.

"I detected some of you have a lack of interest in new connections. Therefore I need to continue my work here without the presence of some people."

It's only a minute ago you thought about how you need to show growth in your relationship and now you're worried that you haven't done enough. Your hand immediately grabs Hyunjin's as you close your eyes, anxious.

"Two of you must leave the retreat tonight," Lana announces.

-

YOU: And we thought we'd get good news [exhales]

-

The tension in the room heightens as Lana is about to announce the two people being sent home tonight.

Hyunjin is nervous and so is everyone because, at this point, it could be anyone. Lana sees everything and he admits that he hasn't shown enough progress which puts him at risk of leaving the retreat.

"One of you has spoken many times about being a closed-off person, and couldn't see how the retreat would change that," Lana explains the reason why she chose this person.

Hyunjin can think of someone who fits that description, he turns his head to the side where Marie is sitting and she kind of guesses who it is as well.

"The second person I'm eliminating tried opening up to the process at first but it seems that they lost focus on the purpose of the retreat," Lana gives another explanation on the reason why she sent home the second person.

For this one, Hyunjin can't tell who it is but he prays inside that it's not him. He hopes that Lana gives him so more time to continue building this connection with you.

"Therefore, their stay at this retreat has come to an end."

He slowly inhales air and quietly lets it out while continuously wishing that Lana would not call his name.

"Exiting the retreat tonight are..."

He sees no one is feeling safe either because no one wants to go home yet.

"...Pablo and Marie."

He feels relieved that it's not him but it doesn't make him feel good either knowing that someone else has to go. He gets up from his seat to give Pablo and Marie a farewell hug for he found friendship in them.

"Pablo and Marie, it's time for you to leave the retreat," Lana orders.

Everyone standing up to send them off with a wave goodbye and sending well wishes their way.

Tonight started fun and it turned into the opposite in a flip of a switch, but that's life, we never know what's going to happen next.

What Hyunjin knows is that he's grateful that he's still here. He rests his head on your neck as the two of you lie on the bed still dressed in your party costumes, he puts his arm across your chest and pulls you close.

"I'm happy we still have each other," he softly whispers to you.

You endearingly brush his head and place a sweet peck on his forehead, "Me too, baby."

Lana has given him more time in the retreat when it could have been him going home tonight and for that, he feels grateful because he's not ready to go, he can't even imagine himself leaving you.

-

HYUNJIN: It's been hard, but at the same time, I... understand the situation.

-

This morning is the same as like other morning in the retreat.

The lights are on as a wake-up call for everyone at the same time every day. You wake up and see Hyunjin the moment you open your eyes, you give him a morning kiss on the cheek.

You run your hand through his hair and softly greet him, "Morning, baby."

He smiles in response and mumbles, "Morning."

He takes your hand, puts it around him, and leans in to make a trail of kisses on your inner arm, continuing it to your shoulder and neck.

"Morning, fam!" Edie cheerfully greets everyone in the room who is still stuck in their beds.

"It's crazy that sometimes I can see this mole of yours and sometimes I don't," you say in bewilderment as your index finger poked the faint mole under his left eye.

He closes his eyes and blissfully smiles at you, "Want to hear something crazier?"

"Yeah. What?"

"You're getting sexier and sexier every day," he answers while squeezing the flesh on your waist.

"Ouch!" You yelp in pain but that only encourages him to tighten his hold around you.

It's a peaceful morning until someone recognizes what is missing in this room.

"Wait, where's Lana?" Frida asks.

You scramble to turn on the bed to see the cone is missing from its usual place, she usually sits prettily on the small round table in the corner of the room but she's not there.

"Shit! Lana's gone," Edie says, her mouth stays open.

You exchange a glance with Hyunjin but he's also befuddled with Lana's sudden disappearance, well, a staff probably took the cone away while we were asleep but there must be a reason they're doing it.

"We're always in a throuple with her so it's weird Lana is not here when we wake up," Saskia says while cuddling with Remy on their bed.

"She's out on a date with Siri," Andy jokingly says with a satisfied laugh.

"Maybe Lana prepared breakfast for us," Diego wildly guesses, "she's in the kitchen being Lana Ramsey."

Everyone laughs at that one but it starts to get serious when everyone is getting their breakfast and Lana is not there, Andy goes to check the cabana just in case someone misplaced her.

"She's not there either," Andy returns with an answer.

"Do we have to find her?" Gustav confoundedly asks, not knowing what to do since he's still new in this retreat.

"Just don't make us dig sand to find her, please?" Edie grumbles, getting flashbacks from that first day we arrived at the villa.

"Do you think Lana's disappearance is good or bad for us?" Edouard asks, curious about what everyone thinks of it.

"Maybe she needs some time alone, guys," Saskia coyly says with a glass of orange juice in her hand.

Everyone comes up with various theories about Lana's disappearance and they react differently to it, some are nervous, a few are excited and the rest are a mix of both.

"Oh no, she's not here either," Emilie whines as she looks around searching for the cone in the dressing room.

"Maybe she's tired of us?" Frida coyly says, plopping onto her usual seat at the vanity table.

Vic hands you a bottle of sunspray and turns her back to you, "As long as she doesn't take the money with her, I'm cool," she says.

You turn on your chair to help her spray her backside evenly and make sure you don't miss a spot, you've been doing a very good job at it considering that her skin remains pale while everyone else has gotten tan lines.

"I think Lana is watching us from afar you know when you leave kids by themselves to see if they're going to misbehave or not?" Saskia comes up with another theory.

Her theory is the most plausible one, it's Lana we're talking about, just because she isn't there doesn't mean she's not watching. She wasn't there during the boat party yet she knew everything that happened.

"She probably sitting in the control room laughing at us right now," Edie jokes.

However, the scariest part of this is not the disappearance but what will happen with Lana not around to keep everyone's behavior?

-

YOU: This can't be good. She's just gone like that?

-

Wait, is everything allowed now?

With Lana disappearing this can only mean that the rules no longer exist as well and that gets Hyunjin excited. He's been good all these times so he thinks he deserves, at least, a little something for his good behavior.

"Lana is gone. The rules are off," Hyunjin mutters as he styles his hair next to Diego in the bathroom.

Diego chuckles and sprays some hairspray into his hair, "I don't know, man, I think that's a bad idea," he disagrees with him.

"Why don't we kiss to test the water?" Hyunjin boldly suggests.

Diego shoves him to the side in reaction to his crazy idea, he gets it that he's been careful with Frida ever since they got the green light. He then leaves the bathroom only for Edouard to come and take his spot.

"Lana's gone. What does that mean?"

Hyunjin's question is not merely a question, it's a test to find out which side Edouard is on: the side that wants to break the rules or the other side that thinks Lana is still watching.

"There's no rule, bro. Know what I mean?" Edouard says with a devilish grin as he combs his hair to the back.

This is the energy that Hyunjin seeks from someone and he feels more confident now knowing he's sharing the same brainwave with someone in this retreat, an accomplice to his mischief.

"Bro, I'm definitely breaking the rules tonight," Hyunjin boldly remarks with a wild, wide grin.

"Been holding it in for so long," Edouard says in continuation of Hyunjin's remark.

"This is going to be a mad night!" Hyunjin concludes with a wicked grin on his face. He raises both hands in the air at Edouard and claps their hands together for double high fives.

Tonight, Hyunjin wants to do a lot of things with you and he'll make sure that it's going to happen.

-

HYUNJIN: My plan for tonight is to give her the best night of her life [smirks]

-

"As soon as I found out Lana's gone, everything I learned from the retreat has gone out of the window," Vic openly admits.

The dressing room is buzzing and the girls are exceptionally energized tonight, maybe it's the fact that the cock-blocker is nowhere in sight. Vic's words are true, it feels like everyone is back to their default settings and forgot about the purpose of the retreat.

"Okay, but out of all of the boys, who is most likely to break the rules tonight?" Emilie curiously asks while swinging her mascara wand in the air.

"Pfft... I hope it's Edouard," Vic mumbles.

Edie smacks her lips together then places her hand on your forehand, "To be honest, I think it's Hyunjin," she says, sticking her face at you.

"Oh, yeah," Saskia agrees with an exclamation mark drawn on her face.

Frida chuckles and glares at you, "You better be satisfied tonight 'cause if you ain't, girl..."

"You'll be satisfied tonight," Edie teases you with a sing-song tone while shaking your shoulders.

Their assumption is only making you nervous because of how it comes close to the truth. Hyunjin is and has been ogling at you. Not that he never ogled at you before, he does it more often today and it's not hard to read his mind when he's acting like that the whole day.

Hyunjin chooses the firepit to spend some alone time with you, he makes you sit on his lap even though the sofa could fit seven people. You don't have to second guess everything, you know exactly what he's trying to do.

"Are you alright?" He asks, splaying the hand resting on the small of your back.

"I'm feeling good, babe," you reply with a convincing smile and hope it's enough to hide how nervous you are inside.

His other hand rubs down your thigh and plays with the hem of your skirt, all the while he's putting on this gaze that is soft yet intense and lustful.

"You look very, very cute," he compliments.

He touches the strap of your top and then your hair, "Cute dress, cute smile, cute everything."

Wow! He really is trying hard to win you over and put that sweet mouth to use, and you need to toughen up more.

"Thanks. You look gorgeous," you compliment back.

Hyunjin is wearing a plain white shirts and leaves the top three buttons open, exposing his firm chest muscles and soft skin, inviting you to touch.

Instead of giving in to your intrusive thoughts, you start buttoning his shirts.

"Why are you buttoning up my shirts?" He asks while chuckling.

"So you don't get cold," you simply answer with a suppressed laugh.

He ends up unbuttoning them again and parts the opening of his shirt wider to entice you more. You look away to keep your composure and look back at him when get yourself under control.

But Hyunjin steps up his game, he mixes his sweet words with some physical touches, weakening your defense system with each passing second.

He brushes your hair to the side and holds it there, "You know I never thought I'd meet somebody like you. You're such a lovely person," he mutters to you.

You reach for his hand and put it down, you're holding it on your lap after.

"That's very sweet of you," you reply with a smile.

He brings your hand to his mouth and then places a soft kiss on your knuckles, reminding you of how plush his lips are.

If this keeps going, you don't know how long you can restrain yourself.

-

YOU: I'm not sure if Lana's testing us, but I'm going to try really hard to not break the rules.

-

Hyunjin knows which side you're in.

You don't want to break rules while Hyunjin is doing exactly the opposite of that. He can see your defense is up, you're a little rigid, you're being cautious with everything you do, and trying so hard not to fall to his charms.

It's a good thing that Hyunjin has a lot of charms and a strong will to crack your defense. He did it once, he just needs to do it again, except that he needs to do it better this time.

He swipes his thumb across your lips and does it carefully to not smudge your lipstick.

"I miss kissing you," he says in his low, sultry voice, "I want to feel those soft lips again."

You nervously chuckle and slip your hand into the hair on the back of his head, "We've known each other better and I don't think we need to put pressure on ourselves to do anything," you tell him.

Hyunjin drops his other hand to your leg, resting it on the back of your thigh and lightly rubbing the skin with his thumb.

"We could do something," he says with a low laugh, "We can break the rules tonight. Like... why waste the opportunity?"

You chuckle again, tilting your head to the side, away from him to put a safe space between you and him. But, he only needs to close that safe space so he leans in.

"A little kiss, come on," he sweetly whispers.

You cup his jaw and fondly smile at him, "I'm rather suspicious that this is actually a test," you say.

He playfully pinches the skin on the back of your thigh and seductively smiles, "Just a bit of fun. No one will find out," he assures you.

He gets a move on by planting kisses on your neck, fluttering little kisses that he's sure make you tingling inside. He puts his hand on the nape of your neck so he can angle your head as he pleases.

He tilts your head to the side and presses his mouth to your ear, "You're so special to me."

He notices that you're slowly lowering your guard down, your eyes are fluttering shut and your hand helplessly gripping the front of his shirt. All it takes is a bit more of his charm.

"You're my special, special, special," he places a kiss along your jaw every time he repeats that one word.

"Special girl," he murmurs for the last time and then he crashes his lips against you

There is no way you will say no to his kiss, not when he kisses you so passionately, lathering your lips with his, soft on soft, slowly and tenderly.

He pries open your mouth with his tongue to taste you more, he uses his teeth to gently bite your lips and puts his hand in the right place to gain access to deepen the kiss.

You break the kiss first and immediately gasp for air, the next thing you do is wipe the lipstick mark around his mouth.

"Does the color look good on me?" He playfully asks.

"Yeah," you shortly reply.

"Put some more then," he teases.

This is only the first rule break of many and it's already a success.

-

HYUNJIN: Told you, Hwang Hyunjin always gets what he wants [nonchalantly shrugs]

-

Now that he's already got what he wants, you hope it's enough for him.

Honestly, you didn't know how you also needed that until he kissed you. You stay in the firepit while everyone else is starting to turn in for the night and the two of you are the only ones still outside.

He brushes your hair, putting it away from your face, and holds your head in his hands like you're a fragile object.

"Should we do something else?" He jokingly asks.

Gosh. You hope he's not seriously asking to do more than a kiss. You pretend to not hear it and take his hands in yours.

"It's getting late," you tell him with a pout and half-shut eyes, showing him that you're getting drowsy even though you're not.

He gently rubs your chin and softly asks, "Want to head inside?"

You nod and smile, "Mm-hmm."

It's a relief that Hyunjin stops trying, you feel like you can properly breathe now as you get off his lap. He gets up from the sofa too and leads the way back to the villa.

You may have failed not breaking the rules but you've tried your best to show some restraint until Hyunjin stops by the terrace and turns his head to the side.

"Want to check the suite first?" He asks.

You nervously chuckle and jokingly ask, "Is it even open?"

Your words only encourage him to take you there and check it. You deeply wish the suite is locked or else, you don't have any other reasons not to get in there with him.

To your dismay, the suite is unlocked.

Hyunjin opens the door and lets you in first. The suite looks exactly like the last time you've seen it, except, there's no chilled champagne, no rose petals on the bed and it's dim with no lit candles in sight.

He closes the door behind him and then goes straight to the bed, sitting on the end of the bed with his legs spreading open.

You're nervous to even get close to him, afraid of what it would lead to. You stand in between his legs, not sure what to do in this enclosed space with him.

Hyunjin puts his hands on each side of your waist and pulls you close, he then buries his head in your chest. You both stay like that for a moment with you softly scratching his head.

He then lifts his head and looks up at you, "I want it to do it," he straightforwardly says.

He loops his arms around your waist and closes the gap between your bodies, "Do you want to do it?"

You don't want to be a hypocrite by saying no when the truth is you want it, you want it so bad that you don't want to resist anymore.

"I do," you honestly answer.

"But it's a big decision," you add with a thin smile.

With Hyunjin, you know you want more than just casually dating each other, you want this to be a genuine relationship, and in a genuine relationship, having sex means taking a step further into a more established relationship.

"You know how I feel about you so let me show you that," he says.

He slightly rises from the bed just to place a kiss on your jaw, "I'm only waiting for you to say the word," he says.

The moment you step into the suite, you know that you've made up your mind and honestly, you're tired of pretending like you can resist him.

You take a deep breath and hold his head in your face, you look into his eyes to seek assurance that you're ready for the next step.

Instead of using words, you plant your lips on him and let your kisses answer it for you.

-

YOU: How am I going to resist Hyunjin?

-

Hyunjin wastes not another second, he takes your top off, exposing your half-naked body to him and he gladly buries his head in between your breasts. He takes one into his mouth while the other one is being fondled by his big hand with his fingers circling your nipple.

"Baby, be gentle, please?" You whine when he accidentally sucks too harder.

He keeps your words in mind but sometimes his body won't obey his commands, it's like it has a mind of its own, a mind that is so hungry for you and only knows a lot of ways to devour you.

He lifts your leg, making you straddle him to satisfy his need for closeness. He crashes his lips against yours again and again yet, can't get enough of it.

Without him knowing, you manage to undo all of the buttons on his shirt and he helps by getting rid of it for you, hurriedly tosses it aside so he can hold you again.

"You never cease to amaze me, baby," he tells you before roughly leaning in to kiss you again.

It's quiet in the room except for the sounds of his lips placing kisses all over you. Your skirt is all hunched up around your waist, your hands are cupping your breasts and Hyunjin keeps going down south, continuing the trail of kisses to your feet.

He then kneels on the bed and looks down at you, his dark lustful eyes traveling down your body, making him realize that you still have your skirt on.

He tugs his fingers on the waistband of your skirt and softly he says, "Raise your hips for me, baby."

You obey right away, raising your hips high enough to let Hyunjin pull your skirt down and off your legs, leaving you with nothing but lacy underwear, the fabric is so thin he can see through it, the thing that endlessly tantalizes him.

He grabs both of your legs, holding them close to his chest before parting them open. He turns his head to the side, bringing your ankle close to his mouth to kiss it. He doesn't stop there, the kisses continue to your inner thighs.

Hyunjin doesn't bother to remove it first, he dives right into your clothed cunt, his greedy mouth full of your flesh and your underwear soaked wet from his saliva.

He's enjoying, enjoying it so much that he puts your underwear to the side so he can taste you better, his slick tongue and his soft lips drenched in your wetness.

He can hear you moaning but it's somewhat muffled, he pulls away for a moment and looks at you between your legs.

"Moan louder for me, baby. I can't hear you with my head between your thighs."

Well, the only way he can make you moan louder is by pushing the right button. He adds his fingers to the combination, giving you the utmost pleasure by moving them in sync.

You keep arching your back and grinding at his mouth, enough to tell him that he only needs to continue his delightful assault to get you to your release.

"Baby, oh..." your voice cracks as your eyes screwed shut, overwhelmed with pleasure.

He kisses your inner thigh as he watches your cunt soaking wet with a mix of your essence and his saliva, but it's your gushing hole that makes him impatient to be inside you.

"Why are you so good with your mouth?" You ask in awe, half panting from all the moaning.

Well, Hyunjin takes pride in his prowess at giving head and it gives a boost of confidence to show you what else he's good at. He pulls the duvet until it covers both of your bodies so as to not expose yourselves to the cameras installed in the room.

Under the cover, he manages to take your underwear off without looking and plays with your bundle of nerves after, feeling it swelling and pulsating under his touch.

"I'm good with my hands too," he says.

You shyly smile and pull him for a kiss, but you show him you want the other thing. You put your hand inside his jeans and his boxer altogether, easily finding his hard cock and wrapping your hand around it.

"So hard. So big," you breathlessly murmur against his lips.

"So ready to be inside you," he finishes your sentence.

You crack a laugh and peck his lips, "Well, what are you waiting for?"

It's good to know he's not the only one being impatient here, but first, he has to get rid of his jeans and put

"Give me a minute to get a condom on," he gives you a peck before rolling to the side of the bed.

He sits on the edge of the bed, rummaging through the small drawers on the bedside table to find a condom, and then takes his jeans off. He unwraps the foil wrapper and carefully rolls the rubber down his length, it's not hard to do so when he's fully erect and it's all because of you.

Once he makes sure he properly put the condom on, he climbs onto the bed and gets under the duvet with you, arms instantly wrapped around you.

The only fear that still lingers in him is that he won't last long considering that he's been refrained from any sexual activities for these past couple weeks. What if he cum the second he put himself inside you? He wants to make the first time having sex with you a special moment, not a humiliating one.

"I want to do it with you," you tell him out of the blue.

It's as if you heard his mind, you assure him that this is what you and there's no pressure whatsoever, you merely want to do it with him.

"And I want to do it with you," he says back with a soft smile on his small face.

You put your hands around his neck and pull him for a kiss, "Let's do it together."

In that moment, Hyunjin gets hit by the realization that everything else doesn't matter. What matters is this moment with you.

He kisses you, fueling himself for what he's about to do next, and while brushing your hair to the side, he says, "I'm going in, yeah?"

You nod with a smile, permitting him to enter the most sacred part of your body.

It's tricky to keep the duvet from sliding off of him as he kneels on the bed again, he then takes your legs and parts them open. He starts by repeatedly rubbing his length against your slit, using your bodily fluid as a lubricant.

With the reminder to be gentle, he uses his tip to tease your entrance before slowly easing himself inside, little by little. You're breathlessly moaning as you keep taking his length so well that Hyunjin can only watch as his cock disappeared into you with your mouth agape.

The only time his eyes stray away from your cunt is to see you moaning with your eyes closed and your hands squeezing your breasts.

A moan slips past his mouth when he is fully sheathed inside your warm, velvety walls and he's not ashamed of it. He keeps groaning as the pleasure of being inside you gets to him, sending his brain close to short-circuit.

He glides his hand up your front and holds the hand cupping your left breast, "Do you see that, baby?"

Hyunjin is eyeing his cock fully buried inside you to the hilt, the image is being imprinted in the back of his head as he thinks out loud.

"I look so perfect inside you, don't you think?"

You nod in a way that is innocent but arousing at the same time which reminds him of how much he wants to ruin you.

He rubs his hand up and down your inner thigh, admiring the view of your body and how it's connected with him.

"You feel so good," he lowly mutters.

He glides his hand up to your chest and kneads on your breast, "I think I need a moment."

Hyunjin takes a minute to adjust himself inside you, how good it feels to be wrapped in your warmth, tight walls, and the way you clench and unclench around him in the slightest of movement.

He kisses you hard and deep to finally start moving and feeling his cock launches deeper and deeper for every thrust into you.

He keeps kissing you and when he's not, moans keep spilling out of your mouth, and calling his name in between those moans. Your bodies eventually move in sync and work together to chase that release.

When Hyunjin finally snaps, he has a moment of clarity. He couldn't believe that he managed to not do it the last time he was here, he had that much restraint in him but now, all bets are off and he's fully aware that it's his biggest gamble yet.

-

HYUNJIN: Best believe, I'm going all in tonight.

-

The next morning, Lana is still no-show.

You know she'll be back at some point but you feel a little relieved that she hasn't, you don't want to deal with that yet. You still want to live in this bubble together with Hyunjin.

"Good morning, angel baby," he sweetly whispers into your ear as he spoons you from behind.

You giggle as he places ticklish kisses on your bare shoulder and neck. He holds you close as he rests his head in the crook of your neck to get a little extra sleep.

The two of you returned late from the suite and sneaked into the bedroom while everyone else had fallen asleep. You see that no one is suspecting anything but Lana's sinister disappearance.

"Lana, girl, how long are you going to hide?" Frida asks while twisting her curly hair and securing it with a hair claw.

Thinking about Lana gets you a little uneasy, you break away from Hyunjin's hold and sit on the bed, offering your lap to let him rest his head on.

He gladly does that, resting his head on your lap and putting your hand in his hair, asking you to play with his dark, silky locks.

"Lana is not running away with our money, right?" Andy asks in a panic.

It's funny that he puts a sense of ownership over it when it's no one's money in the first place, and Lana has the right to run away with the money if she wants to.

"Did anyone break the rules last night though?" Diego asks around, scanning the room with his eyes.

Everyone is playing innocent, shaking their heads or completely ignoring the question like you and Hyunjin did. Avoiding it doesn't mean you're not free of guilt, it's there and it's pooling in the pit of your stomach, making you feel faint.

After lunch, you share the hammock with Hyunjin, simply enjoying each other's presence and the beautiful view of the sea.

"Last night felt like a dream," he says out of the blue.

You get butterflies whenever you recall moments from last night and you find yourself smiling like a fool, "Yeah."

The memories are still fresh in your brain, you remember every detail from the way he looked at you, touched you, kissed you, where he put his hand on your body, and oh... just everything.

He puts his arm around you and puts his head against yours, "I didn't regret doing it with you. It was special to me," he tells you.

"You made me feel special," you sincerely tell him because that's what he made you feel last night: nothing less than special.

"Last night, we took a big step in our relationship," he says.

You nod in agreement.

"Whatever happens, we're in it together," he says, pressing a kiss on your temple.

Of course, he knows that you need comfort and assurance, that's why he said those words. You gently hold his jaw and place a tender kiss on his cheek.

"We're in it together," you repeat his words back to him with a smile.

Hyunjin is right, whatever happens, you shouldn't be afraid because you're not alone, you're in it together with him.

When you walk back to the villa, Andy comes running toward the two of you, his blond hair bouncing on his head.

"What's going on?" You ask him.

"It's Lana. She's back," Andy answers.

-

YOU: I knew it was all too good to be true [exhales]

-

"Anxiety is back, my friend," Edouard shouts as he takes a seat on the curved sofa.

No shit. Your legs are shaking, your hands are sweating and you press your lips together so that it forms a thin line on your face. Even with Hyunjin sitting next to you, you can't seem to relax.

"Even though my conscience is clear, I'm tense," Frida says then lets out a sigh.

The cone is there on the table and she's quietly glaring at you. When she chimes, you almost jump on your seat.

Everyone is gasping in response to her return, even though you know no one is expecting she will be back this soon.

"Hello, everyone," Lana starts with her usual greeting.

"Hi, Lana," you weakly reply with your knee bouncing against the floor.

"Yesterday, I disappeared from the villa to test how you would behave when left to your own devices. Just as you will be in the real world after my retreat," Lana explains.

You do not like where this is going but you have nowhere to go either, you have to face the music.

"Despite my absence, my sensors kept monitoring your every move," Lana further reveals.

"I knew it!" Diego exclaims, triumphantly fisting the air.

Emilie shakes her head and sighs, "It was all too good to be true.

Your guess is not off the mark either, you were right that this was all just a test from Lana and you clearly failed.

"I am very disappointed to report that there were several breaches of the rules," Lana informs.

This is where the witch hunt begins, everyone is looking at each other and trying to spot any guilty faces. Somehow, you manage to keep a straight face despite your heart beating out of your chest.

"Anyone want to start?" Diego asks.

You see Remy and Saskia are glancing at each other and then she turns her head to face everyone again.

"We had a kiss," Saskia comes clean.

"We had a chat, we got carried on. Just once, I swear," Remy explains the details and ends it with a sincere apology.

"There was another breach of the rules," Lana will not stop exposing the rule breakers until they come out with the truth.

Remy and Saskia had it easy because it was their first time breaking the rule and it was only just a kiss. You can't compare it to what you've done with Hyunjin.

"We also kissed, Edouard and I," Vic immediately admits, not holding back from telling everyone about it.

"I just thought that the rules were off," Edouard coyly explains, but the grin on his face tells otherwise.

"Told you, Lana was watching the whole time," Andy tells him.

"I'm sorry," Edouard quickly apologizes to end the conversation.

"The prize fund now stands at $48,000," Lana updates the current amount of prize money.

Everyone must think that's the end of it, that no one else breaking the rules and losing $12,000 is the worst anyone could have done to the prize fund.

You hate to break it to them but they haven't heard the worst of it, you look at Hyunjin and he's pinching at his lower lip which is something he does whenever he's nervous.

"However, there was an additional, serious breach of the rules," Lana further reveals.

-

YOU: I don't know what's coming but Hyunjin and I might be in some trouble.

-

Hyunjin knows he's got to be a big boy and owns up to his mistake. Also, he can't stand seeing you all tense and anxious next to him.

Before it gets messy and uncomfortable for everyone, he leans forward in his seat and starts talking.

"Last night, we... uh," Hyunjin couldn't find any words that would help him soften the blow.

He takes a deep breath and tries again, "Last night we took a step further—"

He gets cut off as everyone else starts groaning in response, knowing the rest of the sentence without him needing to finish it. A few of them seem to have expected this to happen and most of them are disappointed in him.

"This is all my fault, I messed up and I do feel bad," he sincerely says.

He looks at everyone, each and every one of them eye to eye, then with all of his heart, he apologizes.

"I'm sorry," he earnestly says.

"You yet again failed to show any form of restraint and broke the ultimate rule of my retreat, sexual intercourse," Lana says.

Hyunjin didn't think that it would hit him this hard, he may have said he did not regret what he did last night but he regretted acting so selfishly.

"There was $48,000 in the prize fund but because of your numerous rule breaks last night, your prize fund is now at $0," Lana finally drops the shocking news.

There's no money left in the pot anymore and it is all his fault, he understands if everyone is disappointed in him or even hates him for it. He deserves it.

"The prize fund is at $0. However, there will be more tests and opportunities to replenish the prize fund," Lana suddenly shares uplifting news.

It's very rare for her to share good news after bad ones and the mood turns a little lighter, everyone is cheering and applauding for the good news.

"Yes, Lana!" Diego exclaims while clapping his hands together.

"Now I need everyone on their best behavior!" Frida scolds everyone.

But as we all know, happiness is fleeting because Lana hasn't finished with the announcement yet.

"But not for all of you."

Everyone knows what that means and it means she's going to send someone home. He hates to admit it but he has a feeling that Lana is going to send you and him out of here.

"Oh, my days!" Edie whines, fanning her face as she gets red all over from holding her tears.

"No, please, Lana," Saskia hopelessly begs at the cone.

His thought somehow manifests into reality as Lana calls both of your names and his heart drops to his stomach.

"Please stand up!" Lana orders.

Hyunjin can't even feel the ground beneath him as he gets up from the sofa and takes a stand, he puts his arm around you and holds you close, providing you comfort even though he knows you're just as anxious as him.

"As a couple, you have broken the most rules but one of you has shown more disregard for the rules than the other. And that person will be going home," Lana announces.

"Oh, my god," Edie whines again, burying her face in her hands.

"The person leaving the retreat is..."

Deep down, Hyunjin knows that Lana is sending him home, he looks at you and holds you tighter. He can see that you know that he knows.

"...Hyunjin."

-

HYUNJIN: At the end of the day, you can only point one finger and that's at me.

Support my blog by kindly reblog, comment or tip me on my ko-fi!

-

@svintsandghosts @abiaswreck @ppiri-bahng @drhsthl @idkluvutellme @biribarabiribbaem @skz-streamer @biancaness @hanjisunginc @elizalabs3 @laylasbunbunny @kpopformylife @caitlyn98s @hann1bee @mamieishere @is2cb97 @marvelous-llama @bluenights1899 @sherryblossom @toplinehyunjin @hanjisbeloved @yourmomscuntis2tighy @sunnyseungup @skz4lifer @stellasays45 @severeanxietyissues @avyskai @imseungminsgf @silentreadersthings @army-stay-noel @rylea08 @simeonswhore @jebetwo @yubinism @devilsmatches @septicrebel @rairacha @cutiespaghetti @ven-fic-recs @hyunjiinnnn @lostgirlinthewoods @chartrucewhore @kkamismom12 @lixiebokie

[creamflix]

ryomen sukuna x gn/f/m reader; established relationship [y'all are married hehe], somewhat modern au, you have two twins!! [a girl and a boy], so much fluff, domesticity, dad!kuna <3 – masterlist here ☆～（ゝ。∂）

sukuna taps his foot impatiently in the living room, glancing at the wall clock that ticks ominously in the silence. each passing second feels like an eternity, and his brow furrows as he lets out an exasperated sigh. he’s used to chaos, but this morning is dragging on longer than usual. muffled giggles and playful banter drift from the bedroom, piquing his curiosity and annoyance in equal measure.

with a huff, he pushes off the couch, his muscular frame moving with a mix of grace and frustration. as he strides toward the bedroom, he can feel the anticipation build, expecting to find the source of the delay. but when he steps through the doorway, he stops short, his irritation fading into surprise and a hint of amusement.

there, in front of the large mirror, stand his twin kids — a boy and a girl — both a striking resemblance of him, complete with unruly pink hair and bright, mischievous eyes exactly like yours. what catches his attention the most are the markings painted on their faces, made to mirror his own cursed tattoos. their faces are a canvas of playful designs, a mix of pink and black, swirling patterns that frame their bright smiles.

“it’s dress up as your hero day,” you explain, stepping into view beside him, your pride evident in the way you beam at the twins. your eyes, filled with warmth, glisten as you watch them with unconditional love.

the twins turn their sparkling eyes towards their father, and the girl, her excitement barely contained, leaps forward. “daddy, look! we’re just like you!” she squeals, pointing to her face, her small hand trembling with glee.

“yeah! we wanna be just like you when we grow up!” the boy adds, his grin wide and infectious as he strikes a pose, puffing out his chest like he’s ready to take on the world. he mimics one of sukuna’s iconic stances, arms crossed and a cheeky smirk plastered on his face.

sukuna’s heart swells at the sight. he crosses his arms, trying to maintain his usual tough exterior, but he can’t help the corners of his lips from twitching upwards. “you really think i’m your hero, huh?” he asks, a playful growl in his voice, softened by the warmth in his gaze.

“of course! you’re the strongest!” they chant in unison, their voices filled with admiration, making sukuna feel a surge of pride rush through him. he feels an unfamiliar, gentle warmth bloom in his chest, pushing aside his earlier impatience.

“well, i guess i can’t let you down, then,” he says, bending down to ruffle the boy’s hair affectionately while planting a soft kiss on the girl’s forehead. the tenderness in his actions surprises even him, and he quickly stands back up, trying to regain his composure.

“you better not let anyone pick on you,” he continues, his tone now serious but still laced with affection. “if they do, you tell them you’re the kids of ryomen sukuna.”

“yes, daddy!” they reply enthusiastically, their voices chiming together in a melody of innocence and joy.

you watch the interaction, a smile spreading across your face as you witness the fierce king of curses transforming into a doting father. the sight fills you with warmth, and as sukuna glances over at you, you catch a glimpse of something softer in his eyes — an uncharacteristic bashfulness that makes your heart flutter.

“alright, let’s get going before we’re late,” sukuna finally says, a hint of a smile still lingering on his lips as he gestures for the twins to follow him. his voice carries a sense of authority mixed with endearment, and the kids bounce excitedly at his command.

as you walk together, hand in hand, your little family fills the hallway with laughter as they chatter animatedly about their day ahead. feeling a sense of gratitude, you lean in closer to sukuna, nudging him playfully with your shoulder.

“you know,” you begin, a teasing tone in your voice, “you’re not just their hero. you’re mine too.”

sukuna glances down at you, his expression shifting from surprise to a smirk. “oh, really? i thought i was just the guy who does the laundry and cooks dinner.”

you chuckle, rolling your eyes. “sure, but you also happen to be the strongest curse and the coolest dad. that’s pretty heroic.”

he pretends to think it over, his lips curling into a playful grin. “i guess that makes you my sidekick then. you’re lucky to have such a strong partner.”

“right back at you, 'kuna,” you reply with a wink, feeling the warmth of his presence beside you.

with the twins leading the way, you both share a soft laugh, and in that moment, surrounded by the love of your family, you know that these little mornings together are what truly make life extraordinary.

produced by creamflix on tumblr. all rights reserved. do not copy, steal, modify, repost — support your writers by liking and reblogging. ♡ banners by cafekitsune

[angels-fantasy]

Sweet Confessions

Katsuki Bakugou x Fem!Reader

Description : After a night out with friends, Bakugou decides to tell you something while you two are eating sweet pastries.

Details : 1.8k words, friends to lovers, cussing, reader and bakugou are over 21! readers looks are not specified in any way, but she is a woman. small mention of alcohol.

this is my first fanfic ever, so please be kind! constructive criticism is welcome :)

When Bakugou received a text message from Kirishima inviting him out to eat with the bunch of other idiots, he immediately declined. Though this was nothing new, and it was something his red-haired friend was already expecting. Which is why he had Mina execute plan b.

Raccoon Eyes

Yo Bakugou! Come out with us tonight. You're always locked away in your apartment. Let loose a little!

Bakugou glared at his phone and typed out a message.

Hell no.

UGH BAKUGOU!! You're literally no fun. I can't believe you'd miss out on the opportunity to see this cutie -.-

A few seconds later, a picture was sent. When Bakugou opened it, he saw that it was a picture of you. He brought his phone closer to his face and looked it over carefully. He noticed you were dressed for the occasion, like everyone else in the background, and you were smiling widely at the camera. Mina probably told you to pose.

He must've been looking at your photo for too long because another text from Mina came in.

You drooling or what lover boy? Hurry up and get here so you can make a move already. We all know you like her 🙄.

Bakugou felt his face flush. It was true, he did have a crush on you. And though he never verbally admitted it to anyone, they all saw right through him. Except you, of course.

He clicked his tongue and typed up a quick response before beginning to get ready.

Shut up. I'll be there in 30.

"Woo! We got him!" Mina cheered, leaning across the table to high-five Kirishima.

You looked between them suspiciously, "What are you guys plotting?"

The pink woman had the audacity to look nervous. "Nothing! Don't worry about it."

"Yeah, okay."

As Mina and Kirishima kept whispering to each other, you squirmed in your seat. You knew the other pro heroes at the table fairly well, but not enough to just strike up a conversation like you would with Mina.

"Hey pretty, what do you look so nervous for?"

You turned to the left and were faced with a yellow haired man.

"Oh, hi Kaminari. I'm not nervous, just hungry. They're taking a little long to bring out the food. Don't you think?" You lied.

Thankfully he was kind of an airhead. "Oh yeah I know right! I'm starving. I'm gonna go ask how much longer!" He said and got up out of his seat, leaving you alone again.

You sighed and took a sip of your drink. Since Mina and Kirishima were too busy talking to each other, and you didn't want to bother talking to anyone else you decided to scroll mindlessly on your phone.

Some time later, the empty seat next to you was pulled out and sat in by Bakugou himself.

Your ears got hot at the sight of him. It wasn't the first time you'd met him, you two were good friends after all. But you never got used to how handsome he was. It was like he got better looking everyday. You began to wonder what he looks like under that button up-

"Hey nightlight, what're you staring at huh?" He asked, snapping you out of your trance.

"Shut up! I told you to stop calling me that." You said with false annoyance.

"It ain't my fault your quirk makes you a nightlight." He smirked. You scrunched your nose to hide your laugh, but unknowingly failed since Bakugou still saw it.

His nickname for you was completely harmless, and came from your quirk which allowed you to produce light from your hands. It wasn't anything comparable to a pro hero's quirk, but it did have its uses.

"Kacchan you made it!" Midoriya exclaimed with his big smile.

Bakugou clicked his tongue, "Shut it nerd, or else I'll leave. Give me a menu, yeah?"

Midoriya laughed off his words and passed him a menu, used to his harsh way of speaking.

Dinner went on without any problems, and the food was delicious. Everyone around the table cracked jokes, brought up old memories, and some people had even began drinking alcohol, including you.

Your drink wasn't very strong, but the few you had was enough to have you a little tipsy. Thankfully, you took an uber to the restaurant, so you didn't have to worry about driving.

During dinner, you and Bakugou engaged in a conversation. Mostly about his hero work and the villains he had caught recently.

Once everyone finally finished their food and drinks, they had all begun to leave. Slowly leaving one by one, some in pairs as well.

While you grabbed your stuff, you got on your phone to call for an uber but got interrupted by Bakugou talking to you.

"How you gettin' home nightlight? You better not even think about driving after drinking." He warned.

You brushed him off, "I'm taking an uber, don't worry!"

He grunted in agreement and was silent for a moment before saying, "I'll give you a ride home. C'mon."

"No it's okay! I can just take the uber home. Besides, didn't you drink too?"

"Hell no I didn't. It's not my thing. Just hurry up and accept my offer alright? This is the only time I'll be this nice."

You smiled at his words, knowing he was lying when he said this was the only time he'd be nice.

"Alright then, let's go!"

He smirked and held out a hand for you to hold, which you did while he walked you to his car. He made sure you didn't fall on the way there, and even opened the door for you.

"Wow what a gentleman you are. Do you open doors for all the ladies?" You teased.

"Nah, so consider it special treatment for you Nightlight."

You smiled shyly and wiggled your feet a bit after he shut your door and got into his own seat.

The ride to your house was quiet, except for the occasional small talk. But it wasn't awkward or uncomfortable. It was a comforting feeling for the both of you.

When he pulled up to your place, you turned to him to say goodbye, but instead you said "Um, do you wanna come inside with me? I have some pastries I made earlier..."

He laughed lightly at your words, "Sure, but be ready for me to critique the hell out of those pastries."

You led him inside where you both took off your shoes and coats. You ushered him to sit on the couch and relax while you went to go prepare some drinks and the pastries for the two of you.

While you were gone for a few minutes, Bakugou couldn't help but think about how he was actually inside your house. It wasn't the first time he'd been there, but it was the first time he'd been there alone. Just you and him.

In the midst of his thinking, he felt his phone buzz and he looked at it to see a message from Kirishima.

Shitty Hair

I see you left with your little nightlight ;) Better make a move while you have the chance!!

Bakugou huffed and sent a middle finger emoji, then silenced his phone. He didn't need any distractions.

Finally, you came from the kitchen with a tray in your hands and placed it on the coffee table.

"Here they are! My babies. I hope they're still good, considering they're not as fresh as they were this morning." You said nervously while sitting down next to him.

Bakugou hummed and grabbed a pastry, biting into it. You watched silently as he chewed and swallowed it, anticipating his reaction.

He bit it again, "S' good."

You smiled, "I'm glad you like it. That means a lot coming from you, Bakugou. Your cooking is so good!"

He turned away with a red face, "Of course it is. I'm the best at everything. And why don't you call me Katsuki? We've known each other for years now."

"Oh, I didn't realize you felt that way. Sorry Baku-erm, Katsuki. I just thought you didn't want anyone to call you that, especially since Kirishima doesn't even call you that..."

"Tsk, I feel a lot of ways. You just don't know about it."

Your interest peaked at his words. "Oh yeah? Then would you do the honors by telling me how you feel Katsuki?" You teased.

Bakugou felt himself hesitate before speaking, which is something he never did. Gosh, he couldn't believe this is how he was going to confess to you.

"I like you, idiot."

Your smile fell and your expression formed into one of pure confusion. "What?"

Damn. Maybe that wasn't the right move.

He began to panic and sat up quickly, "Ugh, nothing. Forget about it-"

"No! I'm not forgetting about that." You said while grabbing his hand, pulling him back down onto the couch.

As he sat down next to you in silence, you kept his hand in yours. "You like me Katsuki?"

He huffed and turned away. "So what if I do? It doesn't matter-"

You grew frustrated at his words. "Of course it matters! Stop acting like this is nothing. I need you to talk to me seriously, because I don't want to get my hopes up..."

He looked back at you, only to see your eyes watering. "Hey wait-don't cry. Shit. I'm real fuckin' bad at this, ain't I?"

You laughed and sniffled, "Yeah, a little."

He sighed and squeezed your hand that was holding his.

"I uh, I do really like you. I have for a while. I just didn't wanna fuck up what we already had-" He was cut off by you throwing your arms around his neck tightly.

"You big dummy. I can't believe you thought you'd mess things up."

His eyes widened in surprise, but he still wrapped his arms around your waist. He stayed quiet to listen to what you had to say.

"I actually like you too, y'know. I have for a while now."

He smirked and hugged you tighter. "Thank god. I was almost afraid you'd run out on me."

You snorted and pulled away slowly. "No way in hell would I do that. I just didn't know how to tell you..."

He threw an arm around you and said, "Well I'm glad ya did. 'Cause you're my girl now."

"Don't I get any say in this?" You asked jokingly.

"Nah, you agreed when you said you liked me back."

Extra:

That night, Katsuki decided to sleepover at your place since you two had already made it official. You lent him some mens pajamas you had since you were sure they'd fit him, which he fussed about because he assumed they belonged to another man.

"No Katsuki, these are actually mine believe it or not."

"Tsk, good. If I ever find any other loser's shit in here I'll blow it up."

[wisteria-lodge]

The Harry Potter Pretty People's Club

I’ve always been kind of fascinated by how and why *attractiveness* is used in the HP books. So, I’ve decided to play a little game, and score up characters based on how often their prettiness is brought up. Here’s my scoring system:

(1 point) - We are straight-up told that this character (or some aspect of this character) is attractive. The word beautiful, handsome, attractive, elegant, pretty, lovely, good-looking, good looks, nice-looking, curvy, or gorgeous is used.

(.5 points) - We are specifically told the character has nice hair, or nice teeth. (JKR describes teeth a lot, it’s a thing.) 

(.5 points) - The character is described as moving in an attractive way. The word lounging, lolling, graceful, posing, or haughty (so lounging/posing, but more evil coded) is applied to them

In terms of the ranking, twins and and parent+child duos get to compete together, because how common “they looked exactly like their parent” type descriptions are in these books.

No points for “they used to be beautiful” or “they would be beautiful if...” Also no points if someone is described as attractive specifically by Rita Skeeter. We are clearly not supposed to take her as a reliable source. Also not counting the times Petunia calls Dudley “handsome,” or the time when Slughorn calls Ron handsome while trying to cheer him up after the love potion, for the same reason.

(if you’re curious, Rita does describe Hermione as “stunningly pretty,” Pansy as “pretty and vivacious,” herself as “attractive blonde, forty-three” and Harry as “the most beautiful thing she had ever seen” when he’s giving the interview about Voldemort’s return.) So let's get to the top 26 most attractive (?) characters in Harry Potter.

#26 - WILKIE TWYCROSS (.5) 

“Graceful” apparition instructor. Unfortunately the rest of his description stresses that he’s practically see-through.

#25 - MADAM PUDDIFOOT  (.5) 

Has shiny hair. Unfortunately also “very stout” (and unfortunately we we know how JKR feels about fat people  : / )

#24 - ROMILDA VANE (.5)

Has hair that is “black and shiny and silky.” Of course Ron does say that while zoinked out his mind on love potion, so not sure how reliable his report is. 

#23 - HORACE SLUGHORN (.5)

Young Horace has “thick, shiny, straw-colored hair.” He’s also rocking embroidered waistcoats with golden buttons. Idk, I bet Horace was kind of dishy back in the day. Heck, I bet he still is. He’s well dressed, charismatic, charming. Someone has a crush on him. JKR is just mean and wrong about fat people

#22 - NEARLY HEADLESS NICK (1) 

Has “elegant” hands. So, if you’re into that…

 #21 - ANDROMEDA TONKS (1) 

Andromeda’s sisters are not actually going to make the list, because they fall in the “beauty potential” category. Narcissa “would have been nice-looking if she hadn’t been wearing a look that suggested there was a nasty smell under her nose,” and the “long blonde hair streaming down her back gave her the look of a drowned person.” I love Narcissa, but that framing isn’t especially flattering. Bellatrix was once beautiful, but “something — perhaps Azkaban — had taken most of her beauty.” Now if Andromeda looks enough like Bellatrix to give Harry a double-take, and she looks like a Bellatrix with “wider, kinder eyes” who hasn’t been to Azkaban… she more than earns her place on the pretty list. Also is described as “haughty.”

#20 - ANGELINA JOHNSON (1) 

“Rather attractive” according to Lee Jordan. Seems to wear micro box-braids, which Pansy says look like “worms.” Boo Pansy (who is not on this list.) 

#19 - PERCIVAL, KENDRA & ALBUS DUMBLDORE (2) 

Percival is “good-looking,” Albus has shiny hair, and Kendra is “haughty.” I’ll buy that the Dumbledores were a pretty striking family, that makes sense . But they rank a little low because they all only have one attractive descriptor apiece. 

#18 - OLYMPE MAXIME (2) 

She’s an elegant frenchwoman. The only lady on this list described as “handsome.” Also graceful, has shiny hair, and Hagrid is very into her. 

#17 - PARVATI & PADMA PATIL (2)

Both of them look “very pretty” in their Yule Ball dress robes, and are quickly snapped up by Beauxbatons boys when Harry and Ron ignore them.  

#16 -  FIRENZE (2) 

The “handsome centaur.” Also the only character described as “gorgeous” (by Parvati.) At which point Hermione scoffs and says that he’s got four legs. By which we can deduce that Hermione is a bit vanilla for this conversation.

#15 - BILL WEASLEY (2) 

Described as “good-looking” and “handsome” by Mrs. Weasley, and of course FLEUR is very into him very quickly. I considered adding “cool” to my list of words connoting attractiveness, which would have bumped Bill higher… but JKR seems to associate “cool” more with personality. Like Mad-Eye and Hagrid are “cool” without being especially pretty.

#14 - GELLERT GRINDELWALD (2) 

Briefly seen in a memory and a photograph, described as “handsome” both times.

#13 - LILY POTTER (2) 

A “very pretty woman” and a woman with a “kind, pretty face.” Like with Andromeda, JKR throws in “kind” to make sure we know this is good-pretty, one step up from the Patil twins who are girly-pretty (sorry Patil twins.) 

#12 - LUCIUS & DRACO MALFOY (2.5) 

They have super sleek hair. It’s brought up a lot. Pansy likes to pet it. 

#11 - BLAISE’S MOM & BLAISE ZABINI (2.5) 

Blaise’s mom is a “famously beautiful witch,” who “had been married seven times, each of her husbands dying mysteriously and leaving her mounds of gold.” Fanon needs to decide on a name for her, and I think Clytemnestra is the right amount of on-the-nose. Blaise himself is described as haughty, and picky, and tends to “pose” and “loll against pillars.” 

#10 - MADAM ROSMERTA (3) 

Attractive, pretty, and the only character who is “curvy.” (I think she might have the boobs of Harry Potter universe.) Also wears sparkly turquoise heels, which is cute. Ron is into her, and so (I think) is Cornelius Fudge. I mean -  “Rosmerta, m’dear… lovely to see you again, I must say. Have one [drink] yourself, won’t you? Come and join us.” Like, that’s flirty, right? 

#9 - ROWENA & HELENA RAVENCLAW (4) 

Surprising that they crack the top ten, but every time we see an image of them they are described as beautiful. Usually with a qualifier like “austere” or “intimidating.” Beautiful is a word with a little bit of an edge to it in this universe. Beautiful people are just… a little suspect. 

#8 - GILDEROY LOCKHART (5.5) 

Very handsome, good hair, good teeth. The teeth are honestly brought up enough to feel a little off-putting and predatory, which I think is exactly the point. Lockhart is a very 90s-Disney-movie queer-coded villain. But, he is extremely good looking (or at least very well put-together.) Mrs. Weasley and Hermione both have crushes on him, and he continues to get fan mail into his St. Mungo’s days. 

#7 - GINNY WEASLEY (5.5) 

Ginny’s an odd one. She’s described as “graceful,” popular, and “a lot of boys like her,” (according to Pansy.) Honestly, that’s mostly how we experience her beauty. Krum thinks she’s attractive, Blaise thinks she’s attractive, Amycus addresses her as “Pretty” in a creepy way, and so does some random Diagon alley amulet salesman. Both Harry and the narrative voice stay pretty quiet when it comes to thirsting over Ginny. We get the honestly very conflicted description “Ginny gave Harry a radiant smile: He had forgotten, or had never fully appreciated, how beautiful she was, but he had never been less pleased to see her” and then “Ginny and Gabrielle, both wearing golden dresses, looked even prettier than usual [at Fleur’s wedding].” Which isn’t even completely about Ginny! Maybe you could count the romantic descriptions of her hair being flamelike or on one occasion “dancing,” but that’s really it. I am doing my very best, and scraping the bottom here. 

#6 - HERMIONE GRANGER (7.5) 

Hermione seems to fall firmly into the “cleans up nice” category. She is the “pretty girl in blue robes” at the Yule Ball, looking good enough that Pansy gapes and Malfoy “didn’t seem to be able to find an insult to throw at her.” She’s also looking good at Fleur’s wedding, when Viktor and Ron are definitely interested. Her hair can look elegant and shiny if she puts in effort - otherwise it’s bushy, and Pansy compares her to a chipmunk. We also know she has large front teeth, before she gets them fixed. She occasionally gets a “graceful” or “haughty" description, and Greyback does creep on her (again with the creeping!) calling Hermione Harry’s “pretty little friend.” I also gave her half a point for the description of Horcrux!Hermione, who is “more beautiful and yet more terrible than the real Hermione.” That’s another good example of how JKR uses the word “beautiful,” and I guess “more beautiful” definitely implies some existing beauty.

#5 - CHO CHANG (8)  

Cho is very pretty. She’s often described that way, and she has long shiny black hair. She naturally pairs up with Cedric, who also scored an 8. I wish I had more to say about her, I really do. 

#4 - CEDRIC DIGGORY (8)

Our first “pretty boy" - he’s described that way by both Harry and Seamus. Seamus actually seems to kind of have a thing about Cedric. He doesn’t believe Cedric put his name in the Goblet of Fire because “I wouldn’t have thought he’d have wanted to risk his good looks.” And true, Cedric is “exceptionally handsome, with his straight nose, dark hair, and gray eyes” and probably our first extraordinarily pretty person. Angelina and Katie think he’s hot, Myrtle creeps on him - although, honestly - Myrtle creeps on everyone, and the text doesn’t take it very seriously. Interestingly in the film we get a moment of Voldemort turning over Cedric’s head with his bare foot, saying “Oh, such a handsome boy” - to which Harry replies “Don’t touch him!”  That’s a subtle difference - in the books it’s only threatening when girls get creeped on, the movies are a little more equal opportunity. 

#3 - SIRIUS & REGULUS BLACK (11) 

Sirius is hot. He’s “carelessly handsome,” his “dark hair fell into his eyes with a sort of casual elegance neither James’ nor Harry’s could ever have achieved.” He rolled out of bed looking this good. Sirius is graceful and lounging and bored as hell, but you know “handsomely so.” Even when he falls through the Veil, it’s a “graceful,” beautiful death. Regulus gets a shout-out too, because he “had the same dark hair and slightly haughty look of his brother, though he was smaller, slighter, and rather less handsome than Sirius had been.” But, as is mentioned nearly every time he appears on the page, Sirius is extremely handsome. Less handsome than Sirius is still handsome. 

I think it’s actually important to Sirius’ character that he is THAT beautiful. Sirius is a kid from a very bad environment who’s one bad day away from just snapping… but you’d never know it. He’s so attractive, he’s so effortlessly talented, he hides everything so well. Of course none of the adults in his life would be worried about him. 

#2 - FLEUR, GABRIELLE & APPOLINE DELACOUR (12.5) 

Fleur almost seems like a cheat, because she is supernaturally beautiful. She is “a woman of such breathtaking beauty that the room seemed to have become strangely airless. She was tall and willowy with long blonde hair and appeared to emanate a faint, silvery glow.” Even Aunt Muriel thinks she’s beautiful. (We also do get told that Fleur has nice teeth.)

But again, she’s beautiful. She’s that slightly threatening, too-feminine beauty. Until she gets married… and has a kid… which redeems her. “While [Fleur’s] radiance usually dimmed everyone else by comparison, today [at her wedding] it beautified everybody it fell upon.” 

#1 - TOM RIDDLE SR. & TOM RIDDLE JR. (14) 

Our clear winner, and also our second “pretty boy.” (Marvolo calls Tom Sr. “pretty,” and Tom Jr. is “his handsome father in miniature.” so yes, Voldemort does count as a pretty boy.) Poor Tom Sr. - the text frames the aftermath of his sexual assault as him “abandoning” his wife, but unfortunately that falls into the wider trend of only girls being victims of creeps in the HP books. It’s like the weird detail about the stairs to the dormitories - the girls can go to the boys dormitory, but not vice-versa. 

But yeah. Tom Riddle’s attractiveness is brought up almost every time he is. We even get details - we specifically know he lost weight and grew his hair out after he left school, and it looked super good on him. Hepzibah Smith is very into him, Bellatrix is very into him. (Although I do wonder just how snakey he looked when they met.) Adult Voldemort doesn’t treat the loss of his looks as any kind of sacrifice, he seems well rid of them. They’re just another annoying aspect he wants to shed on his quest for transhumanism. He gets rid of his father’s name, it only makes sense he would want to get rid of his looks as well. I do like the detail that  original eyes live inside the Locket, that is cool and creepy. 

(but, logically, I can only assume that means his original nose lives inside the Cup.) 

[yellowjestertfs]

Agents of Change

My submission to @occamstfs 2000 follower viral writing contest. A million congrats to @occamstfs for the achievement, and a million more thanks for the help in editing this story.

Not quite my usual story but pretty happy with how it turned out. Also make sure to check out the other amazing authors participating in this contest as well.

As an elite member of the Secret Service, Whitman was prepared for an endless number of threats. He could disarm an attacker in seconds, spot gunmen from a hundred feet away, even disable a bomb with one foot while blindfolded upside down. What he wasn’t prepared for was pretty boys.

"Sir,” Brella, the youngest and only woman in his detail, said, her voice raised slightly in alarm as she pointed out the five men heading toward them in the hall.

“I see them,” Whitman said, placing a hand on his taser and standing up to his full five ten of hight in an attempt to look intimidating. The men were not outright threatening; dressed in too small suits, they could easily be young aides or politicians, if not for the fact that they looked wrong.

Well, that is not exactly true; what really set Whitman off was the fact that they looked perfect—too perfect, like supermodels mixed with superheroes. It wasn’t that Washington didn't have its fair share of handsome fellas. Rather to the contrary, Whitman had known plenty of young senators or lobbyists who used their good looks as an advantage in their careers. None, however, looked like these men. 

They strode forward purposefully down the hallway, feet landing and lifting with perfect synchronicity.

Each of them was tall and broad, with strong muscular legs that bulged against their suit pants, although not quite as much as the bulges in their crotches. Their waists were trim and tight, tapering out to wide shoulders and strong arms. And then there were their faces. 

Though each differed in hairstyle and facial features, they all possessed the same quality to their face. Something about the cut of the jaw or the glint of the eyes made them undeniably linked. Beauty to the point of uncanny.

“Excuse me, sirs. This is a restricted zone; I am going to have to ask you to turn around.” Whitman called out, though the men were still at least 70 feet away. 

The horde of men continued to stride forward, though the one in the lead responded. In a polite but slightly monotone voice, “We are allowed to be here; we have a meeting with the president.” He said face, adopting a smile that didn't reach his eyes.

Whitman tightened his hand on his taser. He knew for a fact these pretty boys didn't have any such meeting scheduled. He found it strange and troubling that that excuse had gotten them this far. Confusing and deeply suspicious. “The president is busy right now. You really should stop walking and tell me how you got in here.” The men kept walking forward, now only thirty feet from Whitman, and his team, posed outside the president’s office. 

“Bret and Berry let us in.” The man said, invoking the name of the secret service agents who watched the door to the hallway. Hearing the names jogged something in Whitman’s head—a fact right in front of him he had somehow missed. He heard his second in command Santiago let out a gasp behind him as he reached a similar conclusion. Two of the men flanking the leader bore a striking resemblance to the agents, only with faces more handsome and bodies more muscular. It was as if those agents had been remade in the image of conventional beauty standard, smooth and unnaturally symmetrical. In addition Bret now had a short beard that suited his dark eyes. While Berry’s hair had been combed and bleached into a thick blond swoop, which complemented his square face, and each man had gained at least fifty pounds of muscle and half a foot in height. 

“Stop right there,” Whitman yelled, losing any semblance of politeness. By now, the men were only ten feet away. Whitman removed his taser from his holster and pointed it at the man in the lead. Behind him, his agents did the same. 

“I assure you we mean no harm. Put down your weapons.” The man in the lead said, his voice intelligent and charismatic but with a hint of something alien in his words. He took another step, and Whitman fired. 

Small metal wires sprung out, latching onto the suit of the man in the lead. The taser in his hand bucked as it sent wave after wave of electricity into the man's body. When he was in the army Whitman had been tased as part of his training. They were the worst five seconds of his life as his every cell was violently electrocuted and he convulsed on the floor. The man in the lead didn't break a stride, seeming more annoyed by the hole the gun left in his suit than the electricity. Whitman watched as Brella and Cameron fired their taser into two of the other men who had similarly lack of response. 

Santiago, seeing the ineffectualness of the weapon, brought out his gun and pointed it at the leader. Whitman always preached avoiding lethal harm as often as possible; but the rapid escalation of the situation surely called for it. In a blur, the man in the lead rushed forward. Whitman could only feel the air kicked up by him as he rushed past and grabbed Santiago’s wrist with one hand, shoved it and the gun upwards towards the ceiling. Cameron reached for his own gun, but Bret and Berry rushed forward to stop him while another man grabbed Brella from behind and put a hand over her mouth. Whitman found himself backing up, physically blocking the door to the Oval Office with his body as his agents were incapacitated before him. 

These men moved faster than humanly possible and were far stronger as well, but Whitman was not defenseless. The last unoccupied man lunged for him, but Whitman managed to sidestep right at the last second, causing the man to lose his balance. Whitman took advantage of this and grabbed him in a headlock, pulling his gun out, and placing it to the man's temple.

Brella screamed something, but the sound was muffled by the hand over her mouth. Santiago’s arm was still in the grasp of the man in the lead, but oddly enough he seemed not to be struggling, instead staring straight ahead at the ceiling with a glazed look. Even more strangely, Cameron now faced away from Whitman, locked in the tight embrace with the man who resembled Berry. Whitman’s eyes went wide as he realized the two were kissing. He was even more startled to realize that Bret was unbuttoning Cameron's white button-down shirt from behind, running his hands over Cameron's now bare lower back.

Whitman couldn’t understand what was happening. His brain, grounded so long in the mundane, couldn’t process the unexplainable happening occurring before his eyes. Santiago's wrist and hand were jerking. No, not jerking, shifting, growing larger, bone pushed outwards as skin tightened, veins slowly rose to the surface. His fingernails straightened into perfect uniform cuticles, and his knuckles became rough and bony and distinctly masculine. His once slender wrist thickened, while his forearm muscles swelled, pushing against the skin with newfound strength as more veins and dark brown hair sprang to the surface like rivers and trees. 

Whitman watched dumbly as the changes quickly grew past Santiago's elbow, onto his upper arm, which grew muscular and brawny, and eventually up to his shoulder, which widened and rounded with new muscle. 

Cameron, from his own embrace, let out low guttural noises of pleasure. He shifted, revealing the side of his face. It looked almost as if Cameron now had a birthmark around his lips. The skin had the skin was slightly darker and completely unblemished. The change spread from around his lips in all directions like a flame in a field. As it went, it changed not just his skin but the landscape of his face, tightening his jaw, nose growing slightly, cheeks becoming high and prominent, and all the while leaving numerous small light brown hairs on his chin and cheeks to form perfectly groomed stubble. His brows became thicker, forehead lost its wrinkles, eyes narrowed and turned a deep shade of green the color of rusty copper. 

As this happened, Bret managed to remove Cameron's suit jacket and shirt from his body. He wrapped his arms around Cameron's torso, rubbing his hands over Cameron's slight belly and hairy chest. Everywhere Bret touched changed rapidly, stomach giving way to tight abs with cut obliques. Bret placed his hands over both Cameron's nipples, and under his hands, pecs grew in for him to cup. His back also shifted as the changes spread, muscles tightening and skin became just as hairless and poreless as on his face. Cameron began to gyrate his hips back into Bret's groin as his moans became louder.

All of this happened in a matter of seconds. Brella was unaffected at least, as she continued to struggle against her attacker. “Stop whatever you're doing or he gets it.” Whitman barked, tightening his headlock on the man he had subdued and jamming his gun further into the man's head.

The one who had grabbed Santiago, the leader, turned to face Whitman. He dropped Santiago's wrist, which instantly fell to his side, slack. The alien changes had spread over his chest, down his torso, and into his other arm. Whitman watched as the changes crept up his neck, thickening as it grew a more prominent Adam's apple. Despite being free, Santiago stood there limply, gun clattering to the floor next to him. The leader took a step towards Whitman. The two men locked eyes. For a moment, he felt an understanding between him and the leader. This man was a killer bee, with drones at his command and yet also supremely dangerous in his own right. Whitman was a bear though, he would do anything to protect his charge, and he had a taste for honey.

The leader raised his hands in surrender, and Whitman smiled coldly. Then he felt a hand wrap around his bare ankle underneath his pant leg. Instant sensations overwhelmed him. Shock, lust, horror—his hormones became an unstable cocktail as sensations wracked his body. From the location of the touch, he felt a deep biting cold; the places where his captor’s fingers touched were suddenly plunged into an Antarctic snowbank. Whitman kicked his leg, breaking his captive’s grip on his leg, but the cold feeling remained. He tried to fire his gun, but his hands began to shake so violently that it dropped from his grip. He looked up and saw the leader had closed the distance to him in a second so that their faces were now inches away. Whitman thought he was going to kiss him as Barry had to Cameron. But instead, the leader whispered in Whitman's ear, so close that Whitman could smell the mint on his breath and feel the hot air on his cheek. “Stop fighting. Enjoy it. Soon we will be one.”

Whitman tried to say something, but only a croak came out. He fell to his knees, then fully to the floor as the burning cold spot on his ankle pulsed rhythmically. Whitman could only watch as the leader and the man who should have been his  captive walked over to Whitman's agents. The changes had fully spread across Santiago's face, giving him a handsome look somehow that shared the uncanny similarity to his attackers. Through his clothes, Whitman couldn’t tell how far the changes had reached on Santiago's lower body, but judging by the large bulge pushing out his pants in the front and the even larger butt pushing out from the back, they were spreading rapidly.

Cameron seemed even further along. His entire body and face were completely changed. He had become a brute of a man, with a tall hulking frame on trunks for legs, a creature of power. His face looked the same way; it shared the other's beauty but had a more square, simple cast to it that made him look halfway between a prince and a caveman. He no longer stared blankly at his head but sneered intimidatingly. He and the leader approached Brella, tying a rope around her arms and legs and putting a gag into her mouth. She looked desperately to Whitman or Santiago for help, but both were just as powerless as she was.

Whitman watched as Santiago’s foot expanded, toes growing and curling in his now too-small shoes. As the last part of his body changed, Santiago looked up from his trance and light returned to his eyes. Whitman tried to signal for him to grab the fallen gun, but instead, Santiago moved to stand by the leader's side. Now a group of seven, numbers bolstered by two of his own, the men walked past a helpless Whitman and into the door to the Oval Office that Whitman had failed in his mission to guard.

The changes spread down Whitman’s ankle into his foot and up to his knee. He found with alarm that he was unable to move those parts of his body, like they had been calcified in stone. With his arms he crawled forward gaining a view into the office. His discarded gun lay a few feet before him. He tried to crawl some more but found the activity becoming more and more taxing.

Inside the office, chaos had erupted. The four secret service agents Whitman had assigned to stay inside the office had heard the commotion outside and were ready with guns drawn. Even so, they were not fast enough. Four of the men, including Santiago, raced blindingly fast toward the men and incapacitated them in seconds; their touch began the changes on those agents that Whitman was currently experiencing. 

The Secretary of Agriculture, Packson Jackson, a little man who the president had been meeting with, tried to stop the intruders, physically placing his body in front of the president. Cameron stepped forward and lifted the man into the air with one hand as effortlessly as if he were a toy. Jackson flailed in Cameron’s grasp, feet kicking harmlessly into the air. Cameron brought his hand up to hover just above Jackson’s face. The meek man shied away, closing his eyes tight in anticipation. He opened his mouth to say something but was cut off as Cameron from above spit down into his mouth, then shoved his thumb between the secretary’s lips. Jackson looked horrified for a second, then a glazed appearance came over his eyes, and he began sucking furiously on the finger as his face started to transform from the inside out. 

Whitman struggled forward. The changes had spread up one leg into his hips and down the other. In the wake of the changes, Whitman's sturdy thigh had become a cut cascade of muscle, thick and hairy and made for pushing mountains instead of walking briskly down White House hallways. His hips spasmed uncontrollably as round mounds emerged to form a tight shelf on his butt, the movement forcing his dick into the ground repeatedly. His penis felt strange, growing erect, then warm, then pricked with hundreds of pleasurable tingles as his dick and balls swelled larger. The haze of sensations creating an overwhelming fogging on his brain became twinged by acute and powerful horniness. 

The president, watching his secret service taken out so easily, raised his hand in defeat. He addressed the leader of the group, who leaned against the doorframe casually.

“I surrender.” He said in his signature southern drawl, giving a disarming smile. “Whatever your grudge is, it's with me, not these people.” He gestured to the secret service agents in various phases of transformation. “Release them and you can kill me, I won’t fight.”

“Kill you?” The leader asked from the doorframe. His voice was deep and hypnotic, with that same twinge of distance from before as if he were detached from the events happening around him. He rushed forward in a blur so that he was only inches away from the president. To Whitman's relief, his hands stayed by his side. “I’m afraid you misunderstand, Mr. President, we are here to give you a gift.”

With herculean effort, Whitman stretched out his arm far enough for his fingers to brush against the handle of the fallen gun. By now the changes had overtaken his other leg and moved onto his torso, which slimed into sleek abs. His head was on fire, every neuron on full tilt; he could barely keep up with the events happening in front of him, and in the back of his mind, he felt something—a new presence knocking on his proverbial mental door.

The president looked down at the Secretary convulsing on the floor in front of him. Already the changes had elongated Packson body significantly and beefed up his slender frame with significant muscle. “I don’t want your gift.” He glanced at Whitman, struggling on the floor for a gun, and knew he needed to buy time. “Let's talk about what you want—money, power, favors. I can do all three if you release these innocent men.”

The leader seemed willing to take the bait. “I sometimes forget how petty and simple men can be.” He said it in a thoughtful retrospective manner, looking the president up and down from his head-higher of vantage. “We are not apes to be so easily swayed from our course by the carnal; we are oneness, brotherhood, fraternity, true revelation. You will soon understand”

Whitman's flailing hand seized the gun. The changes had reached his chest, which now hovered several inches off the ground on pillowy muscular pecs. His shoulders locked up as the changes reached them. As he took aim with the gun the changes continued down his arm, leaving a round bicep/tricep combo and locking his elbow in place. 

Something about the way the leader spoke, about the lofty collective tone. It felt dangerous, otherworldly, and distinctly familiar. The intruder in the back of his mind spoke similarly; it urged him to put down the gun and to join it in its mission of conversion, of domination. 

Whitman blocked it out. He felt the changes spread up his neck, up his jaw, and over his mouth, removing any power he might have had to make a sound. He felt a strange prickle on his face as a thick, well-groomed beard grew in. An exhalation from his straightening nose tickled his new mustache hair. As the changes passed his eyes, he could feel them start to physically alter his brain, making him more malleable and honing him for whatever purpose these changes, this being, meant for him.

Even stranger he felt a connection start to emerge in his consciousness to the other affected men in the room. He could feel their thoughts, their emotions, and their misgivings. 

The leader stepped forward to grab the president's bare flesh. The president flinched back. Whitman could feel the leader's thoughts through the new bond and knew he intended to grab with the right hand and lunge with his whole body. Whitman's wrist and palm were no longer his, fully transformed; it didn't matter. He still had his fingers and just enough of himself left to pull the trigger. 

The leader, or rather the entity inside the leader, felt Whitman's actions as he did them. He was fast, but the bullet was faster. In the split second the entity inside the leader made itself physical to infect the president with his touch Whitman shot. The bullet sailed right into its eldritch form, just between the leader's body and the president, and out the other side. 

The entity led out an ungodly, inhuman, nail on a chalkboard screech, and then it was gone. All around the destroyed office, men woke up as if from a dream, eyes fluttering rapidly and looking around at the carnage they had only passengers to. Cameron looked down at his gargantuan body with shock, while Jackson groaned and picked himself off the floor unsteadily, his body now a foot taller and 100 pounds heavier.

 From the hallway, Brella moaned through her gag. Santiago suddenly himself again, although now with a model's face and a bodybuilder frame, went to untie her sheepishly. Whitman lay on the floor, profoundly exhausted and overwhelmed. 

“Can I shake your hand?” A voice said from above him. Whitman looked up to see the president smiling down at him. That managed to rouse him, and he slowly got to his feet. Every part of his body, save the very tip of his middle fingers, had been transformed. His tailored suit now looked pathetically small on his thick muscular frame, and his face felt wider, more masculine, his jaw jutting outward strongly as if he could chew rocks like gum. He wasn’t sure what to make of it, of his body becoming this new foreign perfect thing. Whitman didn't know how he was going to even start explaining this to his husband or stepkids. 

Now however, he had other concerns. The president stuck out his hand for Whitman to shake, and god damn it if Whitman didn't deserve it. He clasped the other man's hand, meaty fingers, and palm enveloping the leader’s, and shook vigorously with the strength afforded by his new beefy arm. 

The president gave a brief look of shock, and Whitman feared he didn't yet know his own strength. Then he felt something strange. The president's grip tightened, and his fingers started to move in the handshake; no, they started to grow, his hand becoming just as meaty and masculine as Whitman now was. 

The president dropped the handshake and raised his hand to his face, admiring the now smooth tan hand, powerful and devoid of any wrinkles. Both men waited for the changes to spread down his wrist or for the president's eyes to glaze over, but nothing happened. 

“I am so sorry, Mr. President. I will submit myself to quarantine immediately.”

“Oh, hush.” The president said, waving his new hand dismissively. He flexed it appreciatively, admiring the strength and lack of wrinkles “I think this could help me quite a bit in New Hampshire.” He unbuttoned the sleeves of his shirt and rolled it up to reveal his forearm. “Do the rest of me, then I will get you in touch with the generals.”

[taylorswiftstyle]

The Tortured Poets Department | April 19, 2024

Saint Laurent 'Silk Tank Top' - $650.00 The Row ‘Ausra Brief’ - $790.00

Our first look at a new era. 

With so little to go off of, there’s still much to parse here. Between the bedsheets, the pose, and (of course) the clothes - a pair of briefs and a slinky tank falling off the shoulder - to me evokes a combination of both intimacy and guardedness. Soft and vulnerable, but a little careworn and protective. This is the balancing act I think Taylor’s been playing with her whole life (an open heart revealed through deliberate acts) but feels painted in a more (pun intended) black and white way on this album cover. Even the sheerness of the top that plays with transparency, but only how much she permits, strikes me. 

And, it turns out, Taylor wearing The Row (and toting a few new YSL bags too) so much over the last few months was no coincidence (is there ever one with Taylor, really?). Her cozy selects appear to be (as confirmed by her stylist) to be this sheer tank and ribbed brief by YSL and The Row. 

While there’s so much about this album’s themes and sound that we don’t know - it’s of course fun to guess! The idea of the tortured artist to me sounds like it has the opportunity to explore the self-loathing andthe satire Taylor has previously toyed with on both "Anti-Hero" and "Blank Space". Both the sincere truth of self-analyzing a life of being a tortured poet herself while also poking fun at the muses in her life who have aped at being tortured poets - perhaps delivered with a tongue firmly in cheek accompanied by a smirk and an eyeroll. 

I’m excited to see what awaits us and learn more about this project as well as your Critically Kind thoughts. 

Editorial Note: Original cover image captured by Beth Garrabrant - Taylor’s album photographer since folklore. In place of Beth’s image, for which she retains rights, I’ve commissioned a lovely demonstrative illustration by the talented Amelia Noyes.

[blasphemecel]

Michael Kaiser — Mean

PAIRING: Michael Kaiser/Reader WORD COUNT: 6.4k TYPE: Fake dating, This is not fluff or angst but a secret third thing (with a cheerful ending) WARNING(S): Depersonalization/identity issues

The first time you meet Michael Kaiser, you get a bad impression.

Yeah, sure, he doesn’t have the most stellar reputation, anyway. You’ve met all sorts of unpleasant people in your life and he manages to disappoint even when the bar is so low, the only way to go lower is through digging.

You don’t exchange a word with him, but rather you have the misfortune of having to listen to him talk throughout the entire meeting. He starts countless arguments, some valid to an extent. You can tell he’s just doing this because he’s addicted to the sound of his voice and speaking to people like they’re unimportant specks of dust all while commanding their attention. There’s no point to his fussing either because he ends up signing the same contract you do.

Waste of your goddamn time — he might as well have not signed it and saved you the trouble, since the ordeal ends up lasting three hours because of him.

Maybe you should’ve not signed it yourself, but your PR manager was salivating at the idea of fake dating as a publicity stunt, especially with Kaiser who’ll be posing with you for a photoshoot in a few months, so you said ‘whatever’ and here you are. In this predicament with an insufferable man you imagine you won’t get along with, which already predisposes you to never giving him a chance.

___

The first time you speak to Michael Kaiser, you unsettle him.

It’s unlike him to feel disturbed, let alone at the slightest thing. He’s met all sorts of sickos, so he considers himself unflinching in the face of anyone who has anything off about them.

But he’s fifteen minutes late to the ‘date’ you’re supposed to use as a tool to subtly launch your fake relationship and he’s expecting a scolding. Kaiser spots you and heads in your direction, taking the seat in front with a shitty smirk and an ingenuine, half-assed apology on his lips.

What he gets in response is a blank look — almost… unimpressed, which naturally someone like Kaiser takes as a challenge and already sets the tone for the rest of the conversation — and it’s as if you’re staring into his soul. Then in an instant your expression flips to convincing joy, your warm smile contrasting his snide one, and you say, “Let’s act like we’re really stoked.”

A chill runs down his spine. On a logical level Kaiser knows you’re faking it, but it looks real, and that’s what he finds freaky. Also, the speed.

“Let’s not,” he says. “You’re weird,” he adds after you don’t respond.

You don’t react to this information either and settle for maintaining your smile.

The barista decides to spare him from having to look at you while you don’t say anything. He’s pretty sure you’re doing this deliberately, to torture him. When you attempt to order something, he talks over you and asks, “Can you give us one of those shitty milkshakes with two straws in them?”

She stares at him in bewilderment. “We don’t sell those,” she says eventually.

“Can you make one?”

“No…”

“You’re scum,” you tell him, dropping the happy facade. Again, the quickness strikes Kaiser as disturbing. Then you give her a valid order, and he asks for water since they offer that everywhere and he can’t be bothered to read the menu. After the barista leaves, you say, “I could have lactose intolerance.”

“You could. I could be trying to kill you.”

“I don’t know if a milkshake would be enough to kill me.”

“Maybe I was trying to give you a stomach ache,” he concurs.

You don’t dignify that with a reply either.

Kaiser tries to speak with you again, “I really fucking hate milk.”

“Then why’d you do that?”

“To embarrass you, of course,” he says, like he’s revealed to you the natural order of things.

“Hm.” You consider this new information. “I’ll definitely think of a way to get back at you.”

The lukewarm threat seems to amuse him more than anything.

Then you proceed to have a hostile few hours together in public as instructed. You end up throwing napkins at his face.

Kaiser isn’t good at pretending to be in love. The only such image he seems capable of projecting is one of a middle schooler who’s failing to find a balance between playful and mean. Though it also doesn’t matter to you because you mostly teeter on the edge of mean, slightly left of apathetic. Nothing really matters to you.

___

For your second court-ordered date with Michael Kaiser, your manager tells you to get caught holding hands with him at a park after the cafe meeting doesn’t spark much controversy. The notion itself has you scrunching your face, but you don’t complain about it or voice your opinion.

Again, he’s late picking you up by a not negligent amount of time, leaving you to stand in front of your building, motionless and impatient.

Instead of announcing his presence in a more acceptable manner, Kaiser blares the car horn until you realize it’s him. After you crawl inside the passenger seat, you turn to look at him and see that he looks very pleased with himself. It’s obnoxious.

“I hope we die in a car crash,” you greet.

“We won’t.” You don’t know why, but his brain interprets this as an opportunity to brag. “I’m an excellent driver.”

He’s not. Somehow you make it to the park without getting into a catastrophe — which, as established, you wouldn’t have minded.

You exit at the same time and Kaiser frowns at you by the time he circles his way around to you. You don’t care enough about what’s bothering him to raise a questioning eyebrow let alone ask, but he tells you, “I was going to open the door for you and then offer to help you up. You ruined everything!”

You roll your eyes. “How gallant.”

“Get back in,” Kaiser says, pointing (as if the gesture will be enough to convince you to play along). “Let’s redo it.”

“What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing. I have a vision for these kinds of things, that’s all.”

“Your vision is trashy and uninspired,” you reject promptly.

Kaiser seems to be the first person in the world who finds your attitude funny rather than objectionable because he grins at your response. But he’s more so looking at you like you’re a bug he finds fascinating in comparison to the rest, without any real respect or acknowledgement. 

“I admit maybe it was a bit cliche,” he says. “Would’ve made me look good, though, if someone caught it on camera.”

You smile that ghoulish smile again and grab his hand like you were told. His fingers are cold and yours even more so, making the grasp clammy and uncomfortable while you begin your stroll. You don’t even know what you’re supposed to talk about with him. Soon enough, you scowl, both the silence and the sensation of getting touched proving too much for you to hide your displeasure, even though Kaiser seems content with letting the silence fester.

“Oh? Why’d you stop? I’ve started enjoying your creepy masquerading.”

“I’m disgusted,” you say.

“Disgusted,” he repeats. “By what? Me?”

“It’s making me sick. Who knows where your hand’s been or what you’ve done.”

Albeit visibly offended for the first time if the lack of an annoying smirk is anything to draw judgments from, Kaiser drops it first. Your arm hangs by your side again, limp.

“Let go, then. Or do I need to do everything myself?” That’s quite a dramatic sentiment coming from a man who has done nothing all day besides a short drive and taking a few steps.

“But my manager said-”

“Who cares? I think my manager’s lucky I agreed to this bullshit in the first place,” Kaiser says. “By the way, my hands haven’t been in any sewers or anything to warrant this reaction, thank you very much.” He must be the type of person who only ever says thank you as if being grateful is some big joke.

“I’m not being literal. I know who you are and what people say about you. My disgust is conceptual.”

“Flattering.” Kaiser’s pleased again with the mention of this tidbit, like the mental image he’s getting of you searching him up gives him immeasurable amounts of satisfaction. One thing you’ve come to notice about him since your last outing is that he’s shameless. “You’re not special, though. Lots of people know who I am.”

“See, this is exactly what I’m talking about. You’re scum.”

“Do you usually talk to people you barely know in this way or is it preferential treatment? I’d love preferential treatment, but the other option is amusing too.”

“Usually,” you say in a monotone. “That’s why I don’t speak much. More so supposed to be looked at rather than heard, and so on.” You finish off your explanation with a flippant gesture. That’s what it’s like for you — ‘shut your trap, it ruins your appeal.’

“Well, I-” there’s an emphasis on the word ‘I’ because Kaiser always thinks his opinion matters, “-think your worldview is pathetic and embarrassing. What’s the point of being looked at if no one will listen to you? How can you be fine with that?”

Fair point. You concede in your head, but don’t commit to agreeing with him out loud. “You’re not special either. Most people gross me out.”

“You hurt me this time.” He’s sneering, though.

After a while of walking, you find yourself sitting on a bench next to him. A few pigeons strut around near your feet, bobbing their heads back and forth, almost catching a groove. “If I had any bread, I’d feed them.”

“I’m not surprised you’d feel interested in such a commoner’s activity,” Kaiser says, as if he is somehow superior to you for not wanting to participate in this.

“Vile,” you say, voice still neutral. You’re not looking at him either, attention glued to the birds.

He doesn’t know which part of it you find dismaying — was it the class shaming or what? “So you like pigeons, but you hate humanity. You’re one of those.”

“I don’t hate humanity,” you say. “But nature is repulsive by default. It’s not amoral. When we’re cruel and ugly, that’s a conscious and opportunistic decision. Every day CEOs throw their employees and workers under the bus for more profits. Someone’s getting murdered as we speak. We’re faking a relationship to attract brand deals. I’m getting sick just thinking about it.”

“Get a hobby instead of thinking about stupid shit like that. Caring about how ugly and bleak everything is won’t get you anywhere,” Kaiser… advises.

“Look at the pigeons.” You’re watching the one with the missing claws, wobbling and struggling to get around. “Humans domesticated them and then abandoned them. I love flora and fauna. They’re interesting and exist much more differently than we do.”

“Does that mean you like my tattoo then?”

“Not everything needs to be about you. It’s not like people will forget you exist when you don’t force yourself to be at the center of conversation.”

This stings him the tiniest bit. Either you’re probing into an insecurity or he’s reading too deep into what you’re gathering from your conversations with him. “If I wanted to have a pseudointellectual conversation, I wouldn’t ask a vapid model to psychoanalyze me.”

“Your opinions are unoriginal and stereotyped just like your ideas about romance,” you say, finally turning around to face him again with those haunted eyes. He’s unamused now, clenching his jaw and all. “A stupid athlete wouldn’t be my first choice for a ‘pseudointellectual conversation’ either.”

“You look down on others and judge them, so what makes you so different from all those ‘scum’ you hate? How are you exempt from your own standards?”

Do you realize you’re displaying similar behaviors to those you’re scolding him over?

“Well, there’s a simple explanation for that,” you say. Kaiser is expecting an argument or something, but you kind of floor him with your follow-up. “It’s called hypocrisy. I’m probably just as disgusting as the average person.”

“Your life must be miserable if you look at everything through this lens. What was the phrase, rose colored glasses? Yours must have shit smeared over them.”

You shrug then make a 50/50 motion with your hand. “My life’s neither good nor bad. I’m indifferent on the subject.”

“Uh huh.” Kaiser considers this, then his lips twitch up, and then his smile broadens — it’s snide and smug again, and you come to the realization that he probably doesn’t know how to smile in any other way — before he inches a little closer to you. Not enough to brush against you, but enough to count as an attempted provocation. “I think people like you shouldn’t be considered alive. Legally speaking. And if we’re being figurative, you’re obviously already dead.”

You frown at him, since he’s kind of right. The fact that Michael Kaiser has the capability to discern truths you don’t want to hear rubs you the wrong way.

“Speaking of birds,” you start, deciding to change the topic, “you remind me of a peacock.”

“Wrong.” He’s pouty now. You find the expression cute, but when you catch the thought you throw up in your mouth a bit, so you ignore it. “I’m clearly a swan.”

“The fact that you have a preference when it comes to what animal you’re considered is sad.”

“And you’re entertaining. Let’s hang out again soon even if those sorry fucks don’t suggest it.”

You find it bewildering how he calls his PR manager’s input a ‘suggestion’ and seems to think he can do whatever he wants. Which, maybe he does, seeing the way he conducts himself. You’re also tempted to tell him to make up his mind on whether he enjoys your company or not, but there are more important matters right now. “We’re not supposed to do that, I don’t think.”

“C’mon, don’t be like that.”

“Why this desire all of a sudden?”

“It’s what I want.” What impeccable reasoning. “I think I can make you enjoy yourself,” he says. “Don’t get me wrong. Not for your merit or anything stupid.” Kaiser offers what you’d describe as a flamboyant hand wave in the air, demeanor laced with complacency. “I think it’d make me feel really charitable and generous if I can manage to add something to your depressing life. Give me a chance to try.”

“Word of advice,” you scoot away from him to the point the edge of the bench is digging into your ass and it honestly hurts, “you’re not gonna get anywhere with that attitude. How you phrased it disgusted me again.”

Kaiser finds your favored terms interesting. Everything is sickening and disgusting and vile and scummy from your perspective. Deep down for reasons he doesn’t want to ponder, he can relate.

“Great. You’ll come around soon,” he promises, with the confidence of someone who thinks this is a game he has a high chance of winning.

___

Kaiser makes it a point to inflict his presence onto you as much as he can afford to with your schedules, even though there’s no need for it. Not that you refuse him either. He’s kind of interesting to keep around, in his own Kaiser-ish way.

Earlier today he invited himself over to your house. He’d decided you need to come up with a story about your ‘relationship,’ but didn’t wanna discuss it through text messages. Apparently he has an interview coming up and wants to be prepared in case they ask him about you.

“How did we meet?” you ask, sitting on the other side of the couch and leaning against the armrest, away from him.

The answer is immediate: “I saved you from a burning church.”

You question what other fantasies this man could probably have because that’s the most absurd thing you’ve ever heard. Your voice somehow remains flat despite the bewilderment when you ask, “Why?”

“Because it’s flashy and dramatic.”

“But if anyone searches it up, they’ll see there haven’t been any… burned churches?”

“You’re such a killjoy.” Kaiser sighs. “It makes it sound mystical.”

“No it doesn’t,” you say, rather flippant about the entire thing. “It makes you sound like a pathological liar.”

“I like your sense of humor.”

“Thanks, but I’m not kidding about this.”

“Then what do you think it should be?” Kaiser asks. Obviously the purpose of this inquiry is to criticize your choice of scenario — even you can anticipate such a predictable move.

You roll your eyes and then look away from him in contemplation. You hadn’t really thought about it, since you don’t do interviews, and therefore you don’t need to concern yourself with hypotheticals on the matter. “Some kind of party, maybe. Post-match celebration?”

“Makes sense,” says Kaiser. “Doesn’t compel me, though. Boring.”

With a hum, you try to imagine what would both appeal to Kaiser and sound realistic. Though he doesn’t seem like the kind of person who’s swayed by practicality. “I went with someone else, but you swept me off my feet so hard, you stole me away from them.”

“I guess it sounds plausible enough while still having an element of fantasy.”

“Is the idea of me liking you the ‘element of fantasy’?”

“Yeah… That’s why I want it.”

You didn’t expect such a response. It has you looking at him weird. You do so often anyway, but now you do it for longer as if trying to glean something. In response Kaiser tells you to take a picture since it’ll last longer. The reply seems extraneous and distracting, and that only makes you feel more suspicious of him, which is weird since you’re not sure what you’re even inferring.

___

Officially it’s your fifth date with Kaiser, unofficially it’s the tenth. This time you’re holding up a frog in your open hands.

He doesn’t know what the point of all the nature-themed outings is — maybe to make him seem down to Earth in the public eye since he’s become notorious for how insufferable he is? Either way he doesn’t care, and he’s not the type to wander at landscapes, but your affinity for ugly animals is kind of cute.

The frog isn’t some special one either. No crazy colors or anything, just a regular green tree frog (according to your expertise). You let it jump onto your palms, since apparently touching their skin is bad for them or something. Kaiser scrutinizes it in distaste, staring down into its big eyes while it croaks. “So you can handle a disgusting amphibian, but you can’t hold hands with me.”

“I see you’re still thinking about that.”

“Well, it was insulting. And besides, it’s never happened to me before.”

“You’re not so bad. I don’t think I’d vomit if we brushed against each other anymore.”

Kaiser seems curious but nonetheless pleased with this development. “Why the change of heart?”

“Because you listen to what I say,” you tell him.

He somehow resists the urge to piss himself laughing at the sound of that. “Your standards are so low. It’s so sad that it’s funny,” he says. Maybe he would’ve dedicated some more time to teasing you over it, but he comes to a realization which immediately lifts his mood. This must mean he’s in your good graces somewhat, and not many people seem to fit there, so that makes Kaiser special to a degree. Right?

“Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up.”

“Who would’ve thought someone who looks the way you do would come out like this?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means I think you were one of those kids who, like, shoved sticks and leaves in mud and called it a potion.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean now?”

Kaiser lets out an annoyed sound, tired of elaborating. “It means I think you’re strange.”

“Hmm, I bet you do,” you say. “There’s a quote I like: ‘It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society.’”

“Yeah, and I bet that’s the kind of message you love. What’s it from?”

“Interesting story,” you say. “This is Jiddu Krishnamurti’s most famous quote, but it doesn’t appear in any of his books. Allegedly he said it to some other guy.”

Kaiser blinks and nods, maybe trying to keep a pretense of having the slightest concept of what you’re on about. “Whatever, got it. I can’t remember the last time I read a book of that sort. Maybe I’ll check him out.”

“You don’t seem like you’d be interested in that type of thing,” you say, staring at him as if you’re trying to figure him out.

“Actually, I am. Can you stop taking every chance to insult me?”

“I’m not. At least not on purpose… So, what are your hobbies, anyway? You never told me.”

“I practice. What do you take me for? Well, I read, too, but psychology non-fiction only.”

You furrow your eyebrows at him. “That’s it?”

Kaiser opens his mouth to justify himself even though there’s no need to be defensive — maybe it’s that he feels like he’s lacking in some department after you bring your attention to it with your little response and generally Kaiser hates to be insufficient. But before he can argue and try and talk himself out of whatever perception you have of him now, an interruption happens.

The frog, which had been lazy and content with merely existing in your grasp, springs without any warning. It leaps out of your fingers and lands on top of Kaiser’s head.

Today you learn Michael Kaiser screams at an ear-shattering frequency when he’s startled. Soap opera level of shock and overreaction.

___

It is when you’re eating at a trashy place for lunch that Kaiser’s looking at his phone, which you find rude since you’re supposed to be spending time together and whatnot. He eats like a pig, too, not graceful at all — you wonder what his fans would think if they saw him with crumbs over his mouth and sauce on his chin. Good material for a public embarrassment campaign, you think.

But it’s in that moment that he finally wipes himself with a tissue and reaches out to all but shove his phone in your face. “Look, we’re so hot!”

You grace the picture with a dismissive glance before looking back down at your meal, disinterested. You already know enough about Kaiser to assume he’d get a kick out of power couple fantasies. And other power fantasies. Really, you find it pathetic.

It was something out of the photoshoot he was showing you, his favorite you presume. Even someone like Kaiser, who has conventional features, isn’t perfect when it comes to these unreasonable standards. He’d been way too stiff next to you while he posed and though his face is symmetrical, his expressions tend to stray to one side, and obviously it’d been corrected.

There’s a mismatch between you on the covers and your image in the mirror. Maybe your brain is exaggerating the disconnect, but every time you see them, it’s like staring into an airbrushed, distorted amalgamation. In other words, you prefer avoiding both the edited products and your reflection whenever you can.

“We don’t look like that,” you say, offhand about his enthusiasm as you are with most things.

Kaiser scoffs and then very blatantly tries to compare between whatever version of you he has on his phone and the you in front of him. There’s not a single good thing you can say about his decision — it’s making your skin crawl just knowing it’s what he’s doing.

“Close enough,” he deems after careful examination.

“I don’t think it’s me.”

“It’s quite literally you.”

“I don’t think anything is me. Like I’m just what I see. My perspective, my point of view. You get what I’m saying?”

“No?” Kaiser says, laughing at you and your apparently strange affliction.

“Well if not that, you have to admit things captured on camera aren’t real.”

“What are you talking about,” Kaiser asks in a flat tone, which leaves it as something less than a question. A few more snickers escape him and he’s grinning at you like a bastard — if at first he regarded you as a slightly more fascinating bug than the rest, by now you must be his favorite, the rarest… A tree lobster. “You make no sense.”

“It totally makes sense. Imagine we’re having sex-”

“What kind of stupid come-on is that?”

“It’s not a come-on, I’m explaining. So, imagine we’re having sex-”

“In what position?”

“Whatever you want as long as it works for the scenario. Anyway, imagine we’re having sex-”

Kaiser laughs harder and then attempts some seductive sort of expression which doesn’t land with you. “I’m imagining it,” he informs.

“Shut up and let me get to the point. Imagine we’re having sex and I’m recording it-”

“Wow, I didn’t take you for such a pervert? Not that I hate it.”

“-so I’m looking at you through the camera lens. The phone’s between us. I’m not, like, in the moment with you. My mind’s absent, it’s all digital. So if you think about it we’re not even really having sex.”

“... You’re losing me even more,” Kaiser says after some contemplation, finding the fantasy unpleasant all of a sudden with this new spin to it. A moment passes during which he takes another big, possibly exaggerated bite, but he at least has enough decency to chew and swallow before adding, “I think you just have a problem.”

You roll your eyes, wondering if he even entertained the thought, but shrug since it doesn’t matter in the end. “Why are we always talking about how I’m weird? If anything, you're eccentric, not me.”

Kaiser wrinkles his nose in offense at the notion and makes an incomprehensible hand gesture in the air. “No. I’ve turned out totally normal. Don’t put me at your level.”

A lot of curiosities spin around your head concerning Kaiser’s behavior whenever you meet and you’re yet to find an answer. What does he want? Clearly he’s comfortable with and used to wanting, but what is it? Attention? Money? Fame? Status? All, none? Will it ever be enough? Is it even the kind of hunger which can be satiated?

Who is he when he’s not playing this ridiculous character?

“I can’t get a read on you,” you tell him.

“Well, you’re socially inept. I doubt you can get a read on anyone.”

“So are you.”

Kaiser feigns hurt over this. He does that a lot. Maybe he finds it hilarious, maybe the performance is all for shits and giggles — who knows.

“I want to dissect your head,” you say after a while of silence.

“Really? That’s what you wanna do with me?”

“Mhm. With a scalpel. I’d make an incision around your temple maybe.”

“My beautiful and demented angel, is that your way of saying you wanna get closer to me?” The sentence comes out mocking with a paper thin smile, but there’s a sense of admiration in it. What for? You raise an eyebrow in visible confusion at the… nickname, but Kaiser doesn’t elaborate. To take away from the tension(?), he announces, “You’ve got something stuck between your teeth,” pointing at your mouth all amused.

___

Kaiser had an ulterior motive in accepting that deal. Though wording it this way makes it sound like some calculated, opportunistic, sinister scheme, when in reality it’s nothing beyond immature and a little humiliating.

Of course, in true Kaiser fashion, when looking to meet someone, he goes straight for the most convoluted option. So when the stupid idea came up, he agreed, even if he put on a bit of a show at first and acted irritating. Confessing to wanting friends is so embarrassing. He’d rather shoot himself at point blank or perhaps commit an act of auto-defenestration than admit the real reason for participating, much less in front of you.

Despite the jabs, you’re also not bad at all. Calm and uninvolved in anything that upsets him and without any expectations towards him.

At first he found your indifference derogatory, but as the months have passed by, there’s a sort of comfort in knowing that he could’ve been some random guy off the street and you would’ve probably treated him the same. In front of you he is neither on a pedestal nor someone to be knocked down on his knees. More Michael than he is Kaiser.

Things have been teetering on a dangerous edge lately. His mind is wandering off towards you again, more and more often each day. Like maybe he’s excited for the next time he sees you or something else repulsive in a similar vein, a giddy feeling bubbling in his stomach. Is this what it would’ve been like to be a little boy with a crush?

Generally he prefers not to socialize with background characters. So he doesn’t know why it’s while he’s having some benign daydream about you that some newbie he hadn’t bothered remembering the name of decides to interrupt him. Besides, it’s inconvenient, he was supposed to be leaving and this guy is blocking the changing room door.

“I heard you’re banging a model,” he says, as if they’re good pals or some shit. Kaiser is also mostly immune to annoying locker room talk since all the other psychotic men he knows are too busy being as fanatical as him to waste time on something as useless as objectifying someone to pass the time, yet here this lowlife is.

Kaiser regards him with a judgmental side eye — for a second too long, almost television-style — and tries to move and sidestep him. “Why do you care? Pathetic cuck.”

“Woah, don’t be like that. I just thought it was funny. I’ve heard about that person before, would’ve thought it would be more of a hit it and quit it type thing. Yet here you are, still together.”

The emotion that zaps him is almost disorienting. Kaiser bruises easily, but it’s all about him. There’s never been much room for anyone else in his mentality of suffocating self-absorption, a depressing way to try and compensate for anyone who’s ever wronged him. Right now, though, he’s feeling anger on someone else’s behalf. A borderline exotic situation.

“So I was curious if that thing about loonies being the best at fucking was true? I’m assuming it is ‘cause I don’t know why else you’d stay with a schizoid.”

In the heat of the moment, when he’s pissed off, Kaiser is not the most poetic wordsmith. Thankfully politeness and civility are sensibilities which elude him. Without a second thought or any regret, he makes use of his water bottle still in his hand and dumps the entire contents of it over his head before elbowing him out of the way while he’s still confused.

___

You really don’t want to be having this conversation.

For fuck’s sake, you’re on break. And isn’t that supposed to mean relaxation? Yet the other model for the shoot today has been bugging you with unpleasant questions, putting you on the spot.

“Isn’t he a narcissist, though?” she asks, refusing to let go of the topic no matter how unresponsive you’ve been.

“I guess? Maybe. In a way…”

“You’re sooo… I don’t know. Like, you don’t even sound sure about what you’re telling me.” She narrows her eyes at you, leaning in a bit closer. “Aren’t you scared of him? Or is it ‘cause you’re so sheltered, you don’t know not to mess around with guys like Kaiser?”

Scared of him? It sounds ludicrous. At worst he’s whiny.

“He’s harmless,” you say. “Just a little rude and preoccupied with himself, that’s all. Actually, he’s an interesting and attentive person.”

She covers her mouth and lets out a sound of amusement, apparently now finding you more convincing and therefore dropping her worries. “He was saying you guys are suuuuuuuper in love with an interview.”

Not too engaged with the topic — since it’s about whatever lies Kaiser told the interviewer to entertain himself — you ask, “Is that what he was saying?”

“Yep. Didn’t you watch?”

“No.”

“Fine. Maybe he’s ‘interesting and attentive.’ I mean, I don’t believe it, but whatever. What about you, though? Do you like him, let alone love him? Can you even like anyone? I mean, shit, you know how you are. So, like, can you? Are you suuuuuuuper in love?”

You avert your eyes. “Yes,” you say. It’s true. You do like Kaiser well enough, probably more than you should. “And stop making assumptions about him and me.”

“What if I don’t stop? What are you gonna do?”

That’s… A very good question because there’s nothing you can do at the moment. Seems like a good opportunity to weaponize your reputation of being a deranged serial killer. “I’ll lick your eyebrows.”

You don’t know if your delivery is persuasive or not, but the idea you’d do such a thing must come off as believable enough because she makes a strange face before backing off.

___

You despise being in situations. And making decisions.

There’s a stupid PR meeting again. Your manager, who you think should move onto writing trashy novellas instead of administering poison to your career just because his imagination is overactive, proposed a new stunt. With the fake relationship running its course, you were discussing ways to publicize the ‘break up’ and he suggested a cheating scandal. Not to mention his great idea had you as the cheater — you swear he’s praying on your downfall at this point.

Maybe because you’ve been treated as some kind of fucked up creature incapable of thought and trustworthy decisions, something insentient, you would’ve went along with it like always. Even though you know you’d look bad, the point is to make noise, and it would be a scandalous story if not anything else. Another indignity doesn’t matter much on an endless list.

Then Kaiser in true Kaiser fashion declared that he wants to keep the relationship going. To you, such an act of flippant defiance is unthinkable.

But obviously this forces you into a position where you need to pick between your options. They’re all staring at you, waiting. Kaiser is smiling at you from across his seat like you’re in on a joke with him. Anxious, you say, “I’ll think about it,” and stand up to leave.

You’re sweating because somewhere within you wanna announce ‘Yeah, I wanna keep seeing Michael Kaiser,’ but it’s so preposterous.

Kaiser doesn’t chase after you (though it’d be his style to do such a thing solely for the drama), but he catches up to you by the time you make it outside of the building, approaching the parking lot.

“Hey. Hey! Hey, stop ignoring me. Heeeeeeey.”

God he is such an annoying pest sometimes. You turn around to face him, snapping, “What?! What was that about anyway?”

“No, what’s with you? What is there to think about? You don’t want to look like a clown in front of the world, do you?”

You’re looking at Kaiser again like you’re trying to figure out a mystery. He always wants things, but what does he want from you? There has to be a reason for this. Otherwise, he should’ve been fine with the separation instead of trying to prolong it.

“Listen,” says Kaiser, a little apprehensive at your silence and expressionless gaze, “I can tell you barely tolerate your shitty job and that you probably don’t like the moronic idea your anthropomorphized cyst of a manager came up with, so why aren’t you protesting it?”

Those are objective enough observations. However, “Anthropomorphized cyst…?”

“You’re changing the subject,” Kaiser huffs, irked. “And by the way the fake meek act isn’t cute at all. They’re making money off of you. Tell them to fuck off and die and stop acting like a hostage.”

“This is very inspirational and all, Kaiser, but how about you tell me why you wanna keep the fake relationship going?”

“Doesn’t matter. If you don’t want that either, you can say we’ll settle for ending it instead of-”

You cross your arms. “Again, your attempts at a pep talk are adorable and appreciated, but you’re changing the subject now.”

“They’re not adorable. I’m right. Say I’m right.”

“Fine, fine, you’re right,” you relent with a roll of your eyes.

Kaiser smiles snidely and clasps his hands behind his back. “Thanks,” he says in a sarcastic tone. Then you expect him to entertain your question, but he doesn’t, leaving you in an uncomfortable staredown against him and his stupid ‘beautiful glowing blue orbs’ ass eyes.

“Answer me,” you demand.

“Your unpleasant personality and reclusive ways have bewitched me.”

…

…

“… What?”

“I won’t repeat myself,” Kaiser says with too much attitude considering the situation. Like, he just spoke out one of the most absurd sentences you’ve ever heard.

“Do you have a brain tumor?”

The outrageous suggestion makes him scoff. “Really? You think I need a brain tumor to like you?”

“Maybe,” you say. “Should’ve let me operate on you when I offered.”

“You’re mentally disturbed,” he replies like the fact turns him on or something.

“So were you asking me out or what?”

“Yes? No? Yes. Yeah, fine, I am.”

“Do you search up ‘personality’ on porn sites?”

“Come on, be serious. I mean what I’m saying and I want to give things between us a try. Do you?”

You cringe as if admitting your feelings or overall being in touch with them in the first place is a physically painful sensation, but in your defense you think you might throw up. “Yeah… Yeah, okay, I’ll tell him tomorrow. My manager, I mean.”

Kaiser swings an arm around your shoulders, visibly pleased with the way this is all going. He sings, “That’s the spirit.”

What had he wanted from you? Affection and care, apparently. You think back on when you’d called him ‘disgusting’ and a foreign guilt overcomes you since you don’t usually lament the remarks you make during your misanthropic hissy fits.

Is it fine for someone such as yourself to also indulge in wanting? Hesitant, with shaky arms, you embrace him around the middle, the gentlest of hugs. Kaiser freezes for a moment as if he’s unsure what to do when he’s not the one initiating things, but eventually returns the gesture. Melts into it, even. Two existences brushing against one another, at first glance contrary yet perhaps similar in many ways.

When you finally pull away from each other little by little, Kaiser says, “Let’s elope now.”

You sigh. “You sure have a way of making everything sound way more exciting than it is.”

(He drives you back to your place, but still sucks at driving. Chivalrously, he avoids crashing the car, though.)

___

Yall I was drinking light yellow tap water for a few daysdo you think somethings gonna happen to me ?

Btw I hate this but it's finally finished after like around a month so whatever lol I' M FREE