Hera: You know that manslaughter is the least serious murder charge?
Hestia: You don't say.
Hera: Manslaughter. Literally, the slaughter of a man. Sounds brutal, doesn't it?
Hades: Heinous. Yet it's the most socially acceptable form of murder.
Hestia: ...So you think they should change the name?
Hera: Yes, I do. How about, "inadvertent life-ending"?
Demeter: "Unintentional snuff-out"?
Poseidon: How about "I can't believe it's not murder"?
Zeus: I support this.
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why does the pjo series have to unnecessarily villainize goddesses (hera & athena) or show them as silly ladies (aphrodite & demeter) BUT posiedon and apollo are somehow shown as the coolest/most likeable gods, even though arguably, they're right after zeus on terms of corruption?
ares shown as the worst god after zeus and hera amuses me. last time i checked, he was the patron god of amazons and literally killed a man for attempting to rape his daughter but guess who cursed women for rejection? apollo. guess who raped women when they said no (aside from zeus)? posiedon.
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Zeus:Oh by the way if you speak disrespectfully to my wife I will kill you.
*silence*
Zeus: Sorry that sounded like a joke. I will actually kill you.
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more than anything, what i want for hera is the safety to have trivial interests, to be unimpressive and entirely mundane. so much of her life is defined by the limitations imposed on her. she is always in some level of pain, and the entire concept of... knowing physical pain as a sensation without ever really experiencing pleasure, only occasional relief, gets to me a lot in the context of disability. she has never had a day in her life where she hasn't had to be concerned for her survival. even when she's able to relax, even when she's just goofing off with eiffel, whatever space he can give her for that... she's still constantly running all of these background processes, calculating and monitoring and making choices for her own safety, and there is something about that... in the same way that "i can't do this. i'm not good enough." being programmed into her is a useful metaphor for understanding trauma, i kind of feel those background processes, the constant need to multitask and take into account so many more things so much more quickly than anyone else, just to exist... there's something about that that resonates with me. i want her to feel safe enough to be able to just... turn that off. for a little while. i want her to see the ocean and not have to think about the direction of the waves.
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What if Everyone Had a Normal Job and Just Played D&D Together on the Weekends AU
Hera is the panicked DM
Kepler (Aasimar Oath of Conquest Paladin) and Jacobi (Halfling Artillerist Artificer) are having a macho pissing contest
Maxwell (Elven School of Enchantment Wizard) and Lovelace (Tiefling Mastermind Rogue) are actually strategizing and putting a plan together
Hilbert (Lizardfolk Knowledge Domain Cleric) and Eiffel (College of Eloquence Bard) are having a rules debate that will be absolutely meaningless in 2 turns
and Minkowski (Dwarven Battlemaster Fighter) is not so patiently waiting for her turn
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I like to think the gods would, on occasion, make use of newer technologies when they want a change from the old symbols. Athena has a drone, Artemis has a sniper rifle, Demeter joyrides a combine harvester, and Apollo… Apollo has a dodgeball.
ZEUS GETS ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS
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started the heroes of olympus series very excited for all these new characters
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Funny how Hera killed/tried to kill two of Cadmus’ daughters and both became immortal goddesses as a result. Literally accomplished the opposite of what she was aiming for lol.
Especially since Semele is a dumbass and Ino is a cartoonish evil stepmother (Phrixus and Helle). In contrast to Heracles who went through hell and back to earn immortality.
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My parents and I watched the season 3 finale of Star Wars: Rebels tonight and I can't believe my mom was the one who was like "WHY ARE THEY* ALL DYING?!" and I was the one being all, "don't worry I'm sure it will be fine." this is the most role reversal we have ever done.
(*to clarify I mean the rebels in general, the main cast was fine)
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douglas eiffel is normally at the bottom of the ‘wolf 359 characters i think about’ list just because idk….. i liked him a lot upon first listening but fandom tends to bastardise him a bit and i just tend to find others more interesting. for some reason though he’s in my head recently. i like that guy
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sure she's evil and mean in every scene she's in. but it's ok she's a silly girl
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Poseidon: Why is my towel still damp?
Zeus: Because it's not your towel, it is my towel dude.
Poseidon: No, it's not your towel, your towel is the white one.
Zeus *chuckling*: I'll tell you this pal I've never used that, I do use the red one every single day.
Poseidon *throws the towel down*: UgH.
Hestia *picks up the white towel*: This towel is so warm and fluffy, it's like it's been in the sun forever.
Demeter: This means you two have been drying your junk with the same towel.
Hades*chuckling*: Intimate.
Hera*about to throw up because she's been close to the junk in question*
Poseidon: ArE yOu OuT oF yOuR mInD!
Zeus: What do you mean am I-
*Hestia consoles Hera*
*while Hades and Demeter take pictures*
Poseidon: How do you think this is your towel! Do you even wash it.
Zeus: No I don't wash the towel, the towel washes me. Who the hell washes a towel?
Hera*with tears in her eyes*: Babe you never wash the?
Zeus: Wait you wash your towel?
Poseidon*now paler*: You Never wash the towel.
Zeus: What am I gonna do? Wash the shower next! Wash a bar a soap?! You gotta think there mate.
Poseidon: I'm furious right now.
Zeus: I get out of the damn shower and I'm clean as a damn baby and I use the towel.
Hades: Wait, have you been wearing my underpants?
Zeus: Sometimes... Yeah.
Hera*pukes*: That's my twin, ZEUSS!
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Having watched the new trailer for Ahsoka's series all I feel like saying for now is that it feels like the team behind this series in particular (CoughCough Fave Diloni) payed more attention to the crowd that bitched about Rebels' tone, art style, and pretty much everything for all of its tenure instead of the people that actually cared about its run (And y'know. The crew of animators, writers, editors, concept artists, etc. that poured a great deal of work into the show...) before then proceeding to scour as many theory clickbait channels, fan wiki forums, and Wattpad stories as possible all the while rushing their visual assets departments into slapping together a production that looks like it's being held together by stick glue.
It's just one grievance among many I have (and likely will develop) but take Hera for example. God, they absolutely sacked my girl visually. Just look at a literal rendered model of PIXELS...
...And work from freelance COSPLAYERS (Credit goes to them of course)...
...Versus this.
...Take this as you will.
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(( i have a brain disease where I can't stop thinking about the episode idiot's array and how it's a comedy from everyone else's perspective but a horror story from hera's perspective ))
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Hydra
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Kanan vs. Rex is something we need more of tbh
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