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littlexscarletxwitch · 10 months

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── ༊*·˚⋆ 𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸 𝗶𝘁, 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗲

paring: yelena belova x fem!reader

tag(s): smut with plot but not really, a bit of angst but then again not really, nsfw, wlw sex

warning(s): MDNI, +18 ONLY read at your own risk, explicit wlw smut, wlw sex, oral sex, kinda toxic relationship, mentions of drinking alcohol, grammatical errors, unedited

word count: 3k

note: I'M SO SORRY GUYS IT SOOOO LOOOONG. College had been kicking my ass. Agh! I need a break from that shit. Anyways... I was actually going to make the smut part longer but I kinda didn't want to ruin it, so this is what you get lol. Also I literally googled the russian pet names, so please correct me if they are wrong. I hope you all like it! Lots of love, M <3

note 2: I got so many requests and I'm so glad you guys asked me to write your ideas, I really appreciate that. It's going to take me so time but I WILL WRITE THEM and I'm so excited about them. Love the way you guys think lol <3

requests are open! + check my rules here + masterlist <3

⇨ Detka: baby - Moya lyubov: my love - Malishka: little girl - Krasotka: gorgeous

You knew this whole thing was wrong, it was a toxic never ending cycle, but still you could never help yourself when it came to her.

You and Yelena were together for three years, three years filled with love and lust and happiness; but then your relationship became hateful, bitter and full of anger, still the lust between the two of you remained the same.

Allegedly, the two of you had broken up 5 months ago. Allegedly, you resented her for the shit she put you through. Allegedly, you didn’t even want to see her face.

Nevertheless, she always found her way back to you, —back to your bed—. The moment her lips made contact with yours, you knew you had lost all sense of reason. How could you restrain yourself when her hips grazed against yours in a slowly almost painful yet divine pace that had you arching your back and curling your toes?

��Fuck,” you breathed out, as her hands thighten the frim grip on your waist.

You always promised yourself it would be the last time, that it was just your body reacting to hers, that you would be strong the next time and would turn her down. It took you a couple more slips to finally understand that you and Yelena were done, that the two of you were through. But you finally came to your senses.

“You do know this is the last time, right?” you said breathless, feeling your quick heartbeat in your eardrums.

You sword to yourself that would be the last time you let yourself give in to her. Just one more night of pleasure, just one more night of kisses and whimperings and moans, and the next day it would be over.

“Yeah, I know,” though her voice was muffled by your cunt you could still make out the sarcastic tone in her voice.

“I mean it, Yel,” you tried to sound serious, and apparently you did because she lifted up her head for her eyes to find yours.

“I know you do,” and she did know. She knew that you meant it, at that specific moment.

But she also knew your statement wouldn’t last long, that you would soon change your mind and her lips would find their way back to your neck, hips, thighs and cunt.

So she allowed you to think it was over, but it will be over once she decided so.

[...]

It’d been a year since you had last seen her, you thought that was it, that the two of you had moved on at last. But maybe you got it all wrong, maybe all the things she made you feel enhanced by being away from her, maybe you forced yourself to forget about her. But there was no point in trying it, for she had made a mark on your heart. Like a tattoo, always under skin even when it gets removed.

But tonight was supposed to be different, you were supposed to have fun, drink and dance with your girl friends. But for some odd reason you couldn't stop thinking about the blonde. You would mess around with some people, but you found yourself thinking that it wasn’t her hands roaming around your body, or her lips leaving kisses and bites all over your neck, it wasn't her scent and it most certainly wasn’t her hoarse voice reaching your ears.

As you and your friends made your way to the bar, you heard your phone ringing. Even before you took a look at the screen you were 100% sure that it was her calling you, who else could it be then?

Your heart picked up its pace as you looked at the ID caller and your suspicions were confirmed. It was at that moment that you realised that you had never blocked or deleted her contact number.

Before you could answer or decline the call, it stopped. You swallowed down the lump that hard formed on your throat, unsure of what would be next. And soon after it stopped you got a text from her, you were about to read it when you noticed that someone was calling out for you.

“I’m sorry, what was that?” you said, quickly putting away your phone, trying to focus on your friend’s words over the loud music.

“We have to use the restroom. Let’s go,” she said, reaching out for your hand, motioning for you to tag along.

“No,” you step back, away from her reach. “I, um,” you felt your phone burning your hand. “I’m going to get some air, okay?” you noticed she wanted to say something against it, so you quickly added: “I’ll be right back, I promise,” you smiled at them, before making your way out of the club before they would follow after you.

Once the cold air of the night filled your lungs you felt like you could finally breathe properly. You looked at her missed call and her text message on your phone screen, it was simple: an address. You knew what that meant, but you weren’t sure of what you should do. As if sensing your doubt, she called you again. The phone kept on ringing in your hand, as you made up your mind.

Seeing her tonight was a bad idea, right? Yes, you might not be really drunk but the alcohol was messing with your brain and you were not thinking straight. Plus, your friends were going to kill you for meeting her.

Seeing her tonight was a bad idea, right? You weren’t just going to throw away the last year and pretend like nothing had happened.

Seeing her would be a bad idea, right? But your mind had other plans as the memories of her soft lips and her rough hands and her raspy voice all came rushing to your brain, and suddenly it was all you could think of.

Seeing her tonight…? Fuck it, it’s fine, was your only thought as you picked up the call.

“Hello, detka.”

The old pet name sent a silver up your spine, still you were yet to form a coherent thought.

“I missed you,” she paused, waiting for you to say something. “Did you miss me?” she tried again. Still, you weren’t answering her, but she knew you were listening carefully to every word. “You know? I’m all alone right now. I wouldn’t mind some company.”

You could sense the undertone she was using, you were no fool to her tactics, even though you would always fall for them. That was the kind of power Yelena had over you, everytime you would do so much as think about her your brain would just shut down and you wouldn’t be able to hear your own thoughts.

“No,” you stated firmly. Shaking your head even though she could not see you.

“Oh, baby. What’s the matter? You want me to pick you up?” you could hear the jiggling of some set of keys. Your heart stopped for a second, was she really that desperate to come and pick you up? You felt your stomach burning.

“This is… This is not right, Yelena. I shouldn't have picked up the call. I should probably not—.”

“Oh, come on, moya lyubov,” again with the russian nickname that would make your knees weak. “How about this, I pick you up, we get some coffee and we just have a quick chitchat?”

You knew that it never was so simple with Yelena, but you felt your walls crashing down.

“I’m not sure, Yel…” it felt weird to pronounce that nickname after so long.

“Look up, pretty girl.”

You felt your stomach sink as you did as you were told. And there she was, in all her glory. You didn’t even question how she knew exactly where you were, Yelena just knew stuff. You knew she was your ex, but she said it was just a quick chat, can’t two people reconnect? You knew you were stronger now to her advances, you were pretty sure you only saw her as a friend. But, in all honesty, you knew you were full of shit.

Without a word, you sent a text to your friends, put your phone in your purse and got into the car, wrecking all your plans. You knew you should just stop, but you couldn't. You cursed yourself for that, she knew you too well and you hated both yourself and Yelena for that.

As soon as you took the passengers sit, Yelena sped up the car and the two of you left the building and your friends behind.

“I did miss you, Y/n,” was the first thing she said as she rested her hand on your thigh.

She knew how much you loved it when she did that.

“Mmm,” you muttered, unsure of what your answer should be.

“Didn’t you miss me?” she jokingly asked as she gently squeezed your skin.

“What do you want, Yel?”

“I thought I told you,” she quickly took a look at you before looking back at the road. “I just want to chat, that’s all.”

“It’s never that simple with you.”

“Well, maybe this time it is. Maybe this time I want things to be different,” she smiled at you, making your heart skip a beat. She still had that kind of power over you and you hated her even more for that. But not really.

You gently shook your head. It was bad, you shouldn’t have picked up the call, you shouldn't have gotten into the car. You should have thought things more clearly before letting her into your life again.

As you were mentally cursing yourself you didn’t realise that the two of you had already made it to whatever place she had driven the two of you. Realisation hit you as you now had now idea where the fuck you were, you had no other choice but to follow her. Or so you told yourself.

Yelena opened the car door for you and stretched her hand out for you to take. Which you did, you didn’t even fight it, you longed for the contact of her skin against yours. And maybe, just maybe, you thought it would be enough, just by intertwining your fingers in between hers. But, god, you were wrong.

You knew the moment you would step through her front door all sense of reason would leave your mind, and it would only remain the lust and feel of belonging you always felt around her. And you were right, the soon you stepped in, it was like you were that same person a year ago and you had no intention in fighting your feelings, not anymore. You thought maybe you deserve it, as a reward for being all this time apart from each other.

As soon as you entered it was as if you could feel Yelena everywhere. It wasn’t just the fact that she was there next to you with her hand in between yours, but you could all also smell her scent all over her place, you could see her in the furniture she had chosen, hear her in the music that was playing, and even though you had yet to taste her lips you were so overwhelmed by her entire being that it felt as if you already had.

“So, um,” she cleared her throat as she closed the door behind the two of you, getting your attention. “Would you like some coffee…?”

“Fuck it, it’s fine,” you mumbled to yourself once more before dropping your purse and shortening the distance and crashing your lips against hers.

Yelena’s hand quickly found their way to your hips, gently squeezing your flesh earning a low groan out of you. She pulled away gasping for air but the next second her lips were back on yours. You moaned into her lips as her tongue easily slipped into your mouth and found yours to mess around with.

You felt a warm feeling in your stomach as her hands roamed all over your body leaving goosebumps on their way. Then they rested on your ass, grabbing the muscle motioning for you to jump on top of her, which you did without a second thought. The feeling became a small fire in your stomach the moment your chest was pressed against hers.

“I knew you would come back,” she mumbled in between your lips, feeling her grin into the kiss.

As a response you bit her bottom lip, not really sure what you meant by that but it felt good when you heard a low moan escape from her lips.

“Don’t push your luck,” you said once you let go of it, earning a small chuckle from her.

“Yeah, you’re right, krasotka,” her thick russian was only fuel to the growing fire in your stomach.

Her lips found the crook of your neck and she left as many bites and kisses as she pleased, leading the two of you to her bedroom. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head and your fingers found their way in between her hair.

Once in her bedroom, Yelena gently laid you on her bed. As her lips made their way down to your collarbone, her hand tugged at the hem of your dress slowly and painfully bringing it up to your waist.

On command, you spread your leg open letting Yelena’s head take the place in between your thighs. She kissed and bit them, her lips ghosted over the area where you needed her the most, but all you got was her hot breath which sent a shiver up your spine and made you groan out her name.

“Stop with the teasing,” you begged her, as your legs rested on her shoulders.

“Tell me what you need,” she breathed out.

“I need you… I need your lips on me,” it almost came out as a moan.

And she did as she was told, but it wasn’t quite what you wanted. Her lips kissed and licked your core, but it wasn’t enough since the area was still being covered by your panties. You wanted more, needed more.

“Yelena, please…” you begged her once again.

“Shh…” she cooed as her fingers tugged at the hem of your underwear and slowly pushed it out of the way. “Is this where you need my lips, malishka,” her hot breath over your now uncovered cunt ripped a moan out of your mouth.

“Yes, yes, just please do something. Please, Yel, I—,” a whimper cut you off as you felt her tongue licked up your slit. “Fuck,” you could feel your heartbeat going a mile per hour.

Her tongue went up and down a few times, tasting your juices, loving who wet you were for her. She then made sure to give your clit as much attention, so she wrapped her lips around it and sucked hard. You felt your leg trembling on her shoulders as she worked her magic on you.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you were a moaning mess, the fire in your stomach felt like it was taking over your entire body and you only wanted to give in, to let it consume you whole —to let Yelena consume you whole—.

You wrapped your legs around her head, bringing her even closer to you. The thought of her suffocating on your count scared you for half a second, but then as she ate you like a starving woman, the thought only added more to your arousal.

Yelena took a quick look at you: eyes closed, lips slightly trembling and parted, brows furrowed, your leg around her head, your hand flying to meet her hair. She wanted that moment to last forever, she wanted to be forever buried in between your legs if it only meant she could see you like this. But she could not stop time and live forever in that moment, so she could only moan at your sight. And that was what it took for you to finally come undone in her lips.

You cried out her name as your leg almost squeezed her head too harshly, but she could take it. A few curses followed her name as her tongue and lips helped you right out your high.

“I missed this, malishka,” she said breathlessly as you unwrapped your legs around her.

Her nose, lips and chin were glistening from your release, you felt something like a match lighting up inside you once again. Much to your dismay she used the back of her hand to clean some of it, which she noticed that it had bothered you since you slightly frown. She chuckled at just how cute and precious you were.

She crawled on top of you, placing her knee in between your legs and her lips found yours. You moaned as you tasted yourself on her lips and tongue, feeling the fire coming back to life.

“I missed you… so much,” she said in between kisses. “Tell me… you missed me too…”

Drunk on her scent, lips and words you couldn’t think properly. But still the words you blurted out were the truth: “I did… I missed you too…”

“Then we should… make up for… the time we lost…'' she said as her hand expertly tugged down the cleavage of your dress, she smiled to herself as she realised you weren’t wearing a bra.

She trailed a path of kiss from your neck, down to your collarbone to finally end with her lips sucking your right nipple.

“Yeah, we should…” you breathed out.

“Then, we are going to be here for a while,” she said, her words were muffled by your tit inside her mouth.

You giggled at her words but then it turned into a moan as she went on sucking.

You knew the whole thing would fire back eventually, but your head was empty, blank, no reasonable thoughts. Just one that it keep you going and that was the only thought you were willing to listen to: ‘Fuck it, it’s fine.’

Likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated! <3

-M

#yelena belova #yelena belova x fem reader #yelena belova x reader #yelena belova x you #yelena belova x y/n #yelena belova imagine #yelena belova smut #florence pugh #florence pugh x reader #florence pugh imagine #littlexscarletxwitch's fic #[🎧⊹♡] based on songs i love #Spotify

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luvhughes43 · 1 year

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because i liked a boy | jack hughes x reader

summary: reader gets hate comments from her ex-boyfriend's fans, saying she's a homewrecker and a slut, all because of the fact that she dated jack hughes.

lyrics: "now i'm a homewrecker, i'm a slut, i got death threats filling up semi trucks, tell me who i am, guess i don't have a choice, all because i liked a boy"

word count: 0.3k

note: something short! also i am not shading olivia i love her!

yourusername posted three months ago !

yourusername

liked by jackhughes, yourbff, and others

yourusername think i only want one number in my phone

Tagged: jackhughes

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jackfan01 HOMEWRECKER!!!

jackhughes ❤️❤️

jackfan02 two hearts only? oh he hates her😭😭

jackfan03 ur such a slut like… broke a whole relationship up and for what?

jackfan04 i think they were already broken up tho?

yourbff cuties💓💓

Liked by yourusername

jackfan05 SLUT! you’re so disgusting.

your dms were filled to the brim with death threats, people calling you names such as a slut and a homewrecker. all because you dated jack hughes… it was ridiculous. by the time your pictures started circling around the internet, blown up on tiktok and strewn across twitter, you and jack had already called it quits. You were only together for a few months, and that was a while ago.

you sat on your couch trying to understand his fans' messages. you went through jacks instagram, and found nothing. so you turned to twitter, where you found out that jack and his new girlfriend had just broken up… and people were blaming you for it. it literally made no sense. apparently she was posting things on her insta that made it look like he cheated on her with you? you didn’t even know what the truth was at this point. all you knew was that people were very angry at you about a situation you didn’t have any part in.

a few days went by and the rumours were still circling. people were going absolutely crazy in your dms, and you debated reaching out to jack so he could get his “fans” under control but you knew he wouldn’t. it wasn’t his fault either though! how was he supposed to get people to stop sending threats? asking for kindness never works. so you vowed to not to post anything on social media for a few weeks, slowly watching the threats and name calling trickle down as the days went by.

finally after everything had settled, you decided to finally post something to break your silence. the whole thing was so ridiculous that you’d laugh if you weren’t a little concerned over some of the threats.

yourusername just posted !

yourusername

liked by yourbff, jackhughes and others

yourusername all because i liked a boy

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#sabrina masterlist #jack hughes fic #jack hughes blurb #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes one shot #jack hughes imagine #nhl imagine #nhl fic #nhl fanfiction #nhl blurb

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deepmochi · 11 months

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Lilith in the 3rd house 👅⛓️

What you need to learn: to listen and learn, be intelligent, and adaptable. Edit: Learn to accep your faults.

What you need to avoid: don't exaggerate, gossip, and blame other for your mistakes.

Celebrities with these placements: Rosalía, Bill Clinton, Bruce Willis, Olivia Rodrigo, Kendall Jenner, Elizabeth Taylor, Grace Kelly, Nicole Rochie, Kate Hudson, Virginia Wolf (apparently), and Jackson Wang. (to name a few)

Lilith in Gemini ♊️ can read it too. It could resonate to a certain extent.

🗝 Easy way with words and at the same time is an issue. People pleasing tendencies that can be damaging.

🗝 An immature native has the syndrome of "I'm different that you because I say so". This could be due to have many siblings.

🗝 Issues with siblings or neighbors, they could feel less than them.

🗝 They like to gossip about others, but they hate to hear things about them.

🗝 Their tones of voices are nice and powerful, so use them wisely.

🗝 They have distinguished words or phrases. Their voice belong to them.

🗝 Artists with these placements have a way with words, in a creative way. For example, Rosalía and Olivia Rodrigo have creative titles and wording.

🗝 Her personal life is very "gossip worthy" to others. People really like to opinionated about it, look a Olivia Rodrigo's issue with Sabrina and Josh. (Note: that wasn't cool for any of them).

🗝 Ironically, sometimes these natives seem to speak something others don't understand.

🗝 Whenever they are insecure, you may notice it when they try to show "how special they are" from the rest.

🗝 The way they damage themselves is through gossips. If they put bad energy towards others, it would come back to them.

🗝 Some give "pick me vibes" since they force the "I'm different discourse". They cannot stop talking about how special they are 😮‍💨. They want you to see it and say it.

🗝 Some can be very annoying about things. Like whining when thing don't go as they wanted.

🗝 They're very intelligent, but they may not appear like that; they feel frustrated at times.

🗝 They have a sibling rivalry. If they are only child, this may translate to peers or neighbors. The truth is that you don't need to compete with anyone. You are you.

🗝 This Lilith is very vocal; she could be very passive aggressive with other and even herself.

🗝 The type of person that says is joking, but it isn't really joking completely. Regina George's style. Her anger will be masked.

🗝 Her words have power.

🗝 This native tend to have many friends or is part of a big social circle. However, they feel alone at times, but they prefer to be with others than alone.

🗝 They know what to say. It clears to them that people believe whatever they say easily.

🗝 They could be the teacher pet or class clown...you name it. They are known in academic settings anyways.

🗝 An undeveloped native is like Gossip Girl, always talking of others and hiding.

🗝 Journaling is very useful; they may have a black list somewhere 🧐✒️.

🗝 The issue with an undeveloped native is that women would avoid them. Why? Is not because she is better than them? No, it's because they cannot trust her. She would use them when she need to. How? Through gossip or lies. I would not trust my deep secrets to a "friend" like that sorry.

🗝 They give me Regina and Gretchen (mixed) vibes from Mean Girls.

🗝 They my overthink about life or academic, prone to anxiety and stress. Also, don't need to be perfect about your performance (school related).

🗝 Overachiever in some cases. Burnout student syndrome. Perfect grades dilemma. This could extend to workplace.

🗝 This is the type of girl that says one thing and do the other. For example, she may text you she is feeling sad; next, she is in party looking happy. 🧐

🗝 She will try to climb in the social game. So, she will not care if she need to steal your bf for the matter. She doesn't want your bf, she needs him for the status.

🗝 They could very detach with others. Be careful with your words. Sometimes, they lack empathy and compassion.

🗝 Good with words, Lilith is so good at gaslighting and manipulating people, even herself. They see feelings in a logical way.

🗝 Deep down, she just wanna feel valuable for her merits. She wants the attention that they didn't give her when she was a kid.

🗝 Professor or teacher humiliated her in some way. She likes academic matters, so don't ever subestimate her abilities.

🗝 She may downgrade herself in other to fit her role.

🗝 Easy to jump from place a to b, but it's hard to stay and establish herself.

🗝 People will try to seal her work, or they don't give her the credit she deserves. Writers and musicians be careful. You need to protect your work.

🗝 Siblings are a threat from their reputation or admiration. I mean, she is jealous about them for x or h reasons.

🗝 Her social circle can be wishy-washy. She does have inner circle, but she's the only one who knows.

🗝 🔞 she enjoys dirty talk, sexting, quickies, and probably very loud or likes a loud partner. However, don't send nudes. People would expose.

🗝 I was writing and writing, so I believe writing ✍️🏼 could work for you as a way to release stress and intrusive thoughts, bb. Also, you use social media a lot.

🗝 Social media, be aware of what you post.

Credit to @deepmochi

Take care, bbs 💓

#lilith #lilith in the 3rd house #lilith in gemini #astrology #astrologynotes #deepmochi #zodiac #astrology community #gemini #lilith series #astrologia #lilith astrology

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cumulo-stratus · 4 months

Note

Hi!! Could you do a Spencer Reid x male reader where reader comes home upset about Strauss (or someone else at work) yelling at them about something so Spencer comforts reader as he breaks down? PLEASEEEEE

Home is with him[s.r]

Spencer comes home to find you struggling, and does his best to help

WARNINGS- angst, villainizes strauss, talks about being yelled at, crying

Spencer Reid x male!reader ][ hurt/comfort ][ masterlist!!

a/n- this was such a cute request!!! sry it took so long

1.65k

Your feet felt like lead blocks as you trudged up the too many stairs to Spencer's apartment.

The bag on your shoulder felt just as heavy as it weighed your shoulder down even more than your posture had already sagged.

You felt like you didn't even have the mental energy to be annoyed when you couldn't get the key into the old jinky lock that was always hard to open.

But it felt particularly annoying today as you grimaced to yourself and flared your nostrils slightly while jimmying with the key

When the door finally jimmied itself open, it creaked with the age of the building through the empty corridor.

You were met with an equally empty apartment in front of you.

Even though you knew he wasn’t there, there was some part of you deep down that still hoped to call out his name and hear a response from somewhere deeper in the apartment.

”spencerrr! i'm home! Are you in the bedroom?” you called out hopefully. The phrase was followed by a pang of disappointment when there was no response, just the quiet creaking of the old building settling.

you had known that your boyfriend was on a case, and you knew that he rarely came home before 10 pm on cases.

but a small part of you still hoped, maybe being the amazing genius of a boyfriend he is, he'd solved it in hours and flown back to take you right into his arms.

you imagined Spencer encasing you in his embrace, the way he always does, and used it to give yourself the strength to put your things away.

By the time your work bag and shoes had been left by the door along with your keys and your grimey work clothes had been shed there was a lump in your throat that you couldn't swallow down.

You shoved the aforementioned work clothes at the bottom of your hamper, trying to push away the bad joojoo lingering on the pieces of cloth.

It felt impossible to not keep recalling the harsh reprimanding and even harsher insults that Strauss had thrown at you. She had decided that today was the day to rip into you over something as simple as some paperwork.

According to Strauss, she won't accept idiocracy or carelessness in her employees. Apparently, this ‘moronic’ mistake could've caused miscommunication, which could've caused a field agent to be injured or killed.

her harsh words clawed at your thoughts as you leaned against the counter in the kitchen, lost in thought.

when you finally forced yourself to make some dinner, you couldn't bring yourself to make an actual meal. So you opted instead to munch on a bag of trail mix.

without the distraction of figuring out what to eat you felt the lump rise again in your throat, strauss’ words ringing in your thoughts.

the lump grew to a burning behind your eyes as you sunk down into the old leather couch that smelled like worn pages.

Spencer's whole apartment smells like old books, that was one of the things that you'd always loved about your boyfriend's apartment.

Usually the smell was a comfort, but today it only furthered to remind you of his absence. Everything reminded you of Spencer when he was gone.

The apartment smelled like him, the kitchen had remnants of Spencer's rushed breakfast that you hadn't the will to clean. And of course every book littered on almost every surface.

You almost hoped the leather would open up and swallow you so you wouldn't have to think anymore. But when no matter how much you willed it to happen and it didn't, you instead opted for the tv.

Friends almost immediately became static. And in this static you felt a warmth on your cheek. A tear. And then another one, and another. And another.

Soon the floodgates were open and your lip wobbled. The only thing you could do was pull your knees up to your chest as you leaned to lay sideways with your head on the pillow, and hope that Spencer would come home soon.

Soon the mixing of the TV, the AC unit, and the dehumidifier all became one collective static noise to your ears.

It felt like moments later when you blinked your eyes open from a sort of half sleep half trance. But then you realized what had woken you; the door unlocking and creaking open across the small mudroom area.

You could hear the faint sound of shoes sliding off, and a bag slumping on the floor as you tried your best to rub off the tear tracks and rub the redness from your eyes away as Spencer approached.

When your boyfriend had arrived, the first thing he noticed as the door closed behind him was that most of the lights were turned off, and that friends was playing faintly on the tv.

All this led Spencer to deduce that you had fallen asleep by the tv waiting for him. It was only 9 pm, but he assumed you'd had a long day at work. That was an understatement.

As he rounded the couch, where he expected to find your sleeping frame, he instead found you, with eyes reddened from tears that had long since been shed.

Spencer's face immediately twisted into a concerned frown, a knot between his brows forming as he took you in.

You looked,, tired. Spencer could see the obvious rementants of tears on your reddened cheeks and in your tired, tired eyes.

When you finally looked at Spencer, he cupped your face in his hand, using his thumb to softly brush away the tears.

No words had been spoken yet, your lip only wobbled the tiniest bit. That was when Spencer finally spoke, “oh honey,”.

Spencer spoke so softly if he hadn't been inches away from you, you wouldn't have heard him. His voice was murmured and gentle.

The sound of Spencer's voice is what caused you to break. You're pretty sure your body was aware that it was finally safe, now that your boyfriend was here. With Spencer you were safe.

The wobbling lip turned to broken sob, and a new round of tears streaking your cheeks. Spencer could feel them hitting his fingers and wetting them.

You needed to be held, and Spencer knew that. So he moved from standing in front of you, to sitting with you in his warm embrace finally.

With you in his arms, you could finally let out the tears comfortably. Their warmth wet Spencer's work shirt, the thin material becoming darker.

You had immediately buried your face in his neck, allowing his scent to overtake you. He smelled like the worn pages of a book and coffee grounds.

It filled your nostrils and made you breath in a deep sigh. Spencer had inadvertently helped to stop you from crying.

He had that effect on you, bringing peace. “You wanna talk about it?” Spencer asked, again speaking with a murmured and ever so gentle tone.

Spencer could feel you sigh into his neck, it was the only response you gave him. Spencer took this as you needed to talk about it, but refused to.

So he asked again- “darling you should at least tell me what happened- please?” Spencer spoke with the biggest puppy dog eyes you’d ever seen.

The only reason you could see the puppy eyes Spencer was so good at was that he had forced you (gently guided your head with his hands) to look at him.

But he was right in doing it, as the look on his face made you cave. You just couldn't not- it was Spencer after all.

Spencer noticed this shift almost immediately. His face softened more than it already had if that was even possible.

“Come on love,”

The furrow between his brows was so tight with worry for his boyfriend you thought they might become one conjoined eyebrow. This thought made you let out a little chuckle through the tears.

With a final sigh, you begin, “well Strauss yelled at me today in front of everyone over a filing error, she said that- that idiotic mistakes like that get agents killed in the field..” you trailed off, not wanting to continue the story as your voice had cracked.

Spencer could tell there was more, but he didn't pry. He just went into helpful boyfriend mode and started rubbing your back gently, allowing you to rest your head back into the crook of his neck.

“My darling I'm sorry-” His voice had a slight gravel to it from how low and soft he spoke.

You watched the way his Adam's apple bobbed when he spoke, and the way the soft skin under his jaw moved in tandem.

You tried to use this to distract yourself from the tears still making their way down your cheeks. It didn't work.

Instead Spencer took your silence as a cue to keep talking. “Would you like some tea, I got a new one you might like at the shop the other day” Spencer said hopefully.

You nodded pitifully, your shoulders still heavy. Spencer just pecked your temple as he stood up.

Only minutes and the sound of a whistling tea kettle later Spencer came back with two mugs. They were a matching set that had Mr. on each, reminiscent of Mr. and Mrs. mugs. Penelope had gifted them as a half joking present a couple years ago.

He placed both on separate coasters on the worn coffee table before pulling you back into his lap. His lanky arms wrapped around you gently and brought you close to his chest.

You relaxed back into him as he gently played with your hair. He spoke calm, soft, and reassuring words to you.

He also peppered small kisses against your hair and behind your ear and anywhere else he could find as you eventually fell asleep against him.

The End

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allamericansbitch · 7 months

Note

What happened with Olivia and Taylor and the credits/royalties thing?

literally nothing happened and everyone freaked out for nothing. i swear no one actually knows and just pretends to. 2 bad people caused all the nonsense and neither are taylor or olivia. Taylor didn't do anything, and Olivia didn't do anything. I'm gonna break it down so people can finally actually understand how it all works (i took music law/copyright classes in college and actually learned about what happened in this situation from professionals not just stan Twitter like other people apparently)

it all started when good 4 u came out and people online said it sounded like misery business by paramore. an ex-member of the band, named Josh- who wrote on misery business, saw that and wanted to take advantage of it. Josh is a terrible person with a flop music career, Paramore fans hate him. he saw how popular good 4 u was getting so he 'saw money signs' when people were accusing it of copying misery business (he literally said that in an interview... to look at a teenage girl and 'see money signs'... gross) and threatened to sue her for copyright. He's bad person number 1.

Bad person number 2 is Olivia's legal team/record label. Because we all know how the music industry works, they protect their money before their artists. Olivia's team saw the copyright threat and immediately folded and gave Josh the credit (and because he got the credit and was a member of Paramore at the time the son was written, all of Paramore gets a credit including Hayley). Olivia's label and legal team got scared that others would come after them with threats so they decided to just throw Olivia under the bus and be overly preemptive. Olivia said publicly that the bridge to her song deja vu was inspired by the bridge to cruel summer. Her team thought that was a loose end they needed ti tie up so they just gave Taylor and others who worked on the song a credit.

Here's the most important thing that I cannot stress enough. Both Taylor and Olivia have absolutely no control over songwriting credits in this situation. Taylor did not ask for the credits, did not need to approve getting the credits, and could not give them back or refuse (same with Hayley for the good 4 u issue). Copyright and credits are all internal issues with the legal teams of the respective parties, they have the conversations and hand out the credits, but the artist is never involved because again, they don't care about the artist they care about money. Jack Antonoff (who wrote on cruel summer) said he just woke up and had a songwriting credit for deja vu, so he wasn't even notified beforehand or remotely involved in any way. That's how it works, you just get one.

Anyone who says 'Taylor threatened to sue Olivia' is wrong and just has no idea what they're talking about. The only person who threatened to sue was Josh, the ex-member of paramore, and he started a chain reaction of preemptive moves. That's all that happened.

#answered #anonymous

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ladylaviniya · 3 months

Text

Lassoed In Love

Chapter 1 || Masterlist || Chapter 3

Chapter Summary: You and Clark are caught by none other than Miss Lara Clark, the person you had originally come for. You learn the girl has a hidden dream.

Pairing: Farmer!Clark Kent X Teacher!reader

Chapter Warnings: 18+ Dead Dove Do Not Eat, Adults Caught Kissing (No Sex In This Chapter), Slowburn, Teenage Angst, Mentions of Military Pathways.

Word Count: 3k

Author Notes: Please leave a comment about your thoughts, it helps me with continuing or adding ideas. I know the ending and main plot but I don't mind hearing theories and new ideas.

I intend to update every Saturday 10am AEST

Inspiring Song: "Brutal" by Olivia Rodrigo

"I guess I’ll come back later then?” Came a new, young and feminine voice interrupting your blood rushing thoughts, “You could’ve told me you were trying to get laid...I could’ve gone to Jonathan’s house.”

You jerked away from Clark totally at the sound of another person standing at the end of the hallway. She was tall and lean with well rounded muscles on her biceps and calfs, her hair was cut short in a pixie cut, her hair was dark but in the sunlight behind her there was a shimmer of Auburn and reds. Her skin was covered in freckles. She was holding a bucket. It swayed by her side. She wore denim overalls and a collared shirt, around her neck were a pair of headphones connected by wire to a small walkman tucked inside her breast pocket.

She was licking her teeth and scoffed at the look of your surprised expression.

“Anyway...guess I’ll be off shovelling more horse shit.”

She turned to leave before Clark yelled out, “Lara, stay. She came to see you.”

The girls dark brows connected, she sarcastically chuckled and turned back to face you, glancing you up and down, “Why? Does she need a tampon? Got a nose bleed Sweetie?”

Clark cupped your shoulders unexpectedly and seethed over your head, “Don’t be using no sass girl, you know how to properly address a guest. Just cause you’re grounded don’t mean you get to keep acting like a brat.”

You were a guest?

She rolled her eyes. You could hear her father click his tongue. “This here is Miss Y/N Y/L/N, the new schoolteacher. Miss Y/L/N, my daughter, Lara.”

Her mean streak washed away in seconds, “oh...” she put the empty bucket on the floor, she sheepishly asked, “I ugh um...wha-what can I do for you miss?”

Even while battling overwhelming embarrassment of being caught kissing her father, you couldn’t help but be jolted by the way Clark had called you by your last name after that lustful kissing embrace. He was different, instead of being affected by it, he appeared composed and in control as if it hadn’t even happened. Your entire body still quivered with every sensation from the moment, making you want to surrender yourself to the all-enveloping flames that seemed to be licking at every pore of your body.

Instead of succumbing to your desire to fall back into his arms, you remained rigidly still with your arms stiffly at your sides while your face burned. You directed all your attention on Lara Kent instead, reminding yourself that she was the reason you were there. Her resemblance to her father gradually became more apparent as the seconds ticked by.

Her brows, eyes, scowling lip and high cheek bones were a copy paste depiction of his own. Her other features must be that of her mother’s you figured. Lara was also tall like her father, maybe half a foot shorter.

As her pale, gleaming blue eyes met yours, you were struck by something in them unlike anything you’ve ever seen before – a mixture of untamed power and bitter acceptance that gave her a wise yet jaded expression. There was no doubt, she was his daughter.

You extended your hand towards her, eager to have a chat, “I’d really love to chat with you, Lara.”

Her expression remained flushed. She crossed the hallway rug to shake your hand anyway, albeit enthusiastically. “Don’t know why,” she stated bluntly.

“You’re only a sophomore, made it in the top of your KAP and you then you just dropped out of school.” The facts hardly needed to be confirmed by the teenager, but Lara shrugged and nodded. You took a lengthy breath, “Dare I ask why?”

The corner of her lip pulled downwards, she looked at her feet and toed the floor, sweeping invisible dust along, “I just... There ain’t nothing there for me.”

You felt increasingly frustrated by the calm, flat statement the girl made, as you couldn’t discern any hint of uncertainty in her demeanour. It was clear from the way she spoke that Lara had already made up her mind and wouldn’t be swayed. You tried to devise another way to approach her, but Clark’s deep, steady voice cut you off before you could find the words.

“Miss Y/F/N, you can finish talkin’ when you get into some decent clothes. Lara, can you find one of yours or one of my old shirts or coats, something to cover her?”

To your astonishment, the girl looked you over with her old soul eyes. “Why? Where are you goin’ off to?” For a moment amusement sparkled in her blue-diamond gaze, and you chewed your lips together worried about the sinister smirk on her face. Fucking teenagers. Absolutely terrifying.

“Miss Y/L/N crashed her car just out on the roadside, see if I can pull it out of the gulley...get it to the mechanics in town,” Clark added to the list.

“I can look at the car Dad, see what I-”

“Lara,” her father said sternly, “Do as you’re told.”

Your eyes widened, you turn fast and quickly regretted it. You touched your forehead with a soft groan. With a wobbly determination you stated, “Mr. Kent, I really don’t need extra clothes and I am fully capable of calling a tow bar. I really need to speak with your daughter, Miss Kent.”

“No,” he chuffed, “Frankly I don’t trust your expertise in cars or maintenance. I also ain’t lettin’ you leave my damn property covered in blood, and,” his hand snuck around and cupped the small of your back, you could have swooned, “...I’ll gather you need to have a sit down again soon..”

His dark eyes flashed up to his daughter, his voice sharp in authority, “Lara, shirt, now.” Without even glancing at you again, he left your side, put on his broad brim hat stalked out the front door.

With Lara dropping the bucket carefully to the ground, she put her hands on her hips as if ready to draw invincible pistols. She smirked and walked passed you, “This way Miss Y/L/N.”

You continued to follow her into a room down the right at the end of the hallway, passed the stairs.

“Our old clothes are boxed up at the top of my wardrobe, but it won’t take long for me to find something to fit you. You can wait and then change in here though. It’s my room.”

Lara opened the door, and you were surprised by what you’d discovered. You had expected makeup, posters, maybe even a stereo and a messy on the floor or bed...instead you were welcomed by a room you swore was devoid of any teenagers inhabitants.

Just like the living room, the bedroom exuded a old charm with its floral wallpaper and thick wooden walls. The absence of modern music equipment or adolescent clutter served as testament to the maturity of its dweller. A neatly made single bed adorned with a homely quilt stood in one corner, accompanied by a simple straight chair. Next to the bed, a collection of bookshelves stretched upwards to the ceiling, their sturdy construction showcasing expert craftsmanship. The shelves were brimming with books, piquing your curiosity, and you idly glanced over the titles, admiring the interesting collection of reading materials. Maths, mechanical engineering, car model histories, science, and the history of transportation were the biggest themes on Lara’s shelves.

As you perused the shelves, you suddenly realized that most the books had a theme: automobiles. From pioneers like Karl Benz to modern innovators like Tesla, the collection covered the entire spectrum of automobile history. There were books on cars, race cars, motor cycles, military tanks, ambulance vans, and trucks. War-related books detailed battles fought in each conflict since tanks made their debut in World War I. You also noticed books on experimental automobiles and driving techniques, as well as delving into internal design and engine capabilities.

Lara stomped over and shut her curtains, maybe for a sense of privacy in case her father returned and got a peep of something you wished you had shown him before Lara interrupted.

In the centre of the room was a brass metal bed. And before you fell face forward you choice to sit at the edge of the mattress.

Lara glanced over her shoulder, “So whatcha do to your car?” her fingers peaking through the curtains. Perhaps she sore her father and your cat.

Your fingers dug into the blanket on her bed as you awkwardly scratched your chin and mumble, “I accidentally crashed it...in an attempt to avoid hitting a rather big bull.”

She held back a laugh and swayed to the wardrobe, the sound of the rail screeched, “Let me guess...Chief? Odin would’ve ran, he’s a scaredy cat, but Chief is half cow, half dumb brick wall.”

She tore out a thick blue flannel shirt with sleeves that would’ve made you look like a child, it was huge while she held it up on the hanger. She held it out to you.

“Thankyou Lara,” you pawed it close and over your head and torso. You slipped into the oversized flannel shirt, fastening the buttons before rolling up the sleeves that hung past your hands. As the fabric brushed against your skin, you couldn’t help but notice the oversized nature of the garment. It felt as if you were enveloped in a warm embrace, a subtle reminder of Clarks presence even in his absence.

While you struggled to poke your arms through the scratchy material sleeves, you tried to continue the point on why you’d grace the Kent’s doorstep.

The scent of Clark filled your nose as you fiddled with the sleeves. It may have been clean and washed, but his cologne was a powerful scent.

You looked around the room again. On the walls were rows of different family photos. A repeat was of a young girl with a missing tooth smiling pushing a toy truck in the dirt. Another photo for her, she was sitting on a old man’s lap watching a race on a big tar road. And finally one of the same girl bent over, staring at awe at the mechanics of a old ford truck, her face and clothes, covered in grease.

You smiled, the little girl was Lara.

The collection on her shelves was not merely an indication of an interest in cars and the like, but rather, it was a testament to a hyperfixation, an obsession. Obsessions, in general, could either harm or uplift people, as some could lead to ruin, while others could elevate individuals to greater heights and make them shine brighter, burn hotter, and live life more fully. However, when those obsessions were not satisfied, the individual would suffer, their soul starved and their life blighted. If your suspicions were correct, then you might have a way to reach out to Lara and potentially help her return to school.

“So...you like cars?” you asked, then winced at your own pedestrianism.

Lara paused, hesitation in her face. Her eyes glanced at her feet.

“Yea...I like ‘em”

“Have you thought about having driving lessons?”

She blinked at you before snorting with amusement as if you said something truly funny.

“Miss Y/L/N...most kids ‘round here know how to drive by the time they’re ten. I’ve been driving since I was six. Sure, grandpa had to reach the pedals for me but, I grew into them eventually.”

“Oh, right, of course you would...” Where were her grandparents and mother? “Anyway, so why did you decide to quit school?”

She shut the wardrobe harder than you’d like. Her nose flared a little as she breathed. Was she embarrassed? Annoyed? Maybe you weren’t the first teacher to have asked her? Despite this Lara gazed at you pointedly and provided the same stark reply as before.

“There was nothing for me there.”

Your brows came together, “Nothing else you can learn from or...?”

“Miss Y/L/N, everything I know, I taught myself.”

That shouldn’t have been possible. It sounded unlikely...but...what if..

You paused. “Miss Lang did not-....” you stopped, unsure of how to phrase your own thoughts or inquires.

“I was always ignored,” she stated sourly, “From the first day of grade four I realised that none of the teachers wanted to help me anymore. I wasn’t included. It was like I was outcasted. I wasn’t allowed to ask questions. I am surprised anyone even marked and graded my work.”

It didn’t make any sense to you, “But you were number one in your class? The top KAP. How is that possible?”

“I read, a lot,” Lara explained, her voice filled with passion. “My dad even buys me cassette tapes that are audio books. I’ve learned more here on this farm than I ever did at Smallville middle and high school. Besides, I know the dairy and maize industry better than anyone else around here, perhaps except for my dad. I didn’t learn that in school. This farm will be mine someday, and this is my life. Why should I waste my time in school when it doesn’t involve what I love?”

You took a deep breath and insisted, “Because you love cars more.”

She couldn’t prevent the avid gleam that shone briefly in her blue eyes, but it was quickly extinguished, “Yea, well, I can’t exactly learn about mechanics and engineering at Smallville High School. Maybe in another life.”

You rubbed the tip of your fingers along the bruise rising on your chin, “How about in this life? Have you thought about taking on an military ASVAB to apply as a diesel mechanic? They can teach you more on hands skills with their vehicles I am sure.”

Lara paled. This time you couldn’t see a gleam of eagerness, but a deep, anguished need so powerful it shook you, as if she’d been shown a glimpse of heaven. Then she turned her head, and abruptly she looked older. “Don’t try to make a fool of me. There’s no way.”

Lara’s face drained of all colour, her eyes widened, replaced by a deep and tortured longing that seemed to consume her entire being. It was as if she had been granted a glimpse of some sort of utopia, something that promised to quench her soul’s desperate thirst. But suddenly, a flicker of doubt crossed her eyes as she turned her head away. She shook her head, her voice filled with a mixture of hope and bitterness. “Please, don’t feed me false hope. I would prefer to be realistic.”

“Why isn’t it realistic Lara? From what I saw in your school folder, the records, your grades are above average. That is more than enough to get you into their programs when you turn eighteen.”

“I dropped out,” she glumly mumbled.

“You can always return.”

“As far behind as I am? I think I would need to repeat this grade, and sorry but, I refuse to sit around and be bullied for it among the other things.”

Other things...it was unclear what those other things were. But every teenager has their own problems and social issues, so you decided not to press any further.

“I doubt you would be that far behind. You will need to catch up and I could tutor you. I’m a licensed teacher, Lara, and I believe I could help you in the classes you need and how to access these supportive programs that could benefit you.”

She chewed her bottom lip and wiped a little sweat from her forehead, “Okay, so, what if I do it?” she muttered. “Dad would be all alone on the farm. What would I do? Join the army and then retire when he croaks?”

You came to her side and touched her shoulder carefully, “Lara, I think your father wants whatever is best for you. If that is your choice, then you can do that. But wouldn’t you like to at least try? Say you tried and gave it a shot, instead of never knowing and always wondering about the ‘what ifs’?”

She straightened, her dark blue eyes fierce, “I guess.”

“Then it’s time to find out, isn’t it?” You smiled.

Lara heaved a sigh, her slender fingers combing through her tousled auburn locks. With a restless energy, she moved to the window, her gaze fixated on the billowing curtains. The rhythmic sway of the fabric seemed to match her inner turmoil. Her eyes, filled with a mixture of longing and resignation, watched the dance of the cloth, as if searching for solace or an answer to an unspoken question.

“Do you really think it’s possible?” she glanced back at you, awkwardly standing in the centre of her bedroom

You nodded, “Of course it’s possible. It isn’t guaranteed, but it’s possible. Can you live with yourself if you don’t try? If we don’t try?”

“If I agreed,” she said, rubbing her hands on her legs, breathing hard, “It would have to be at night. I got my chores around here that have to be done. I can sleep through parts of the day.”

“Night time is fine with me if it will at least get you back in school.”

She gave you a quick look. “You actually mean it, like... You actually cared that I dropped out of school?”

You were dumbfounded, “Of course I care. Lara, teaching is part of my soul,” you began, your voice carried a soft, sombre tone. “When I am unable to teach and know that I’m making a difference, I lose a part of myself. Just as you feel the compulsion to know about vehicles and their inner workings. Isn’t it the same for you? Your fascination with vehicles isn’t just a hobby; it’s a deep-seated need, a part of your identity. If you were to lose that knowledge, to be unable to tinker and understand the machines that you adore, wouldn’t that make you feel like a crucial part of you had died?”

The silence was thick and heavy. And for a shocking moment, you could see the glassy tears gleaming in Lara’s eyes.

“I want it so bad it hurts,” she admitted, her voice raw, her throat bobbed, “so fucking bad Jesus Christ. Sorry for cursing. When can we start?” Her face was blushed and her arms hugged herself.

The bubbling of joy could not be contained. You clapped your hands excitedly, “We can start Monday after school hours. You’ve already wasted enough time.”

You couldn’t help but notice the transformation that was taking place before your eyes, as if the burden of a thousand weights were gradually falling away from Lara’s slender shoulders. She appeared younger, more like the little girl in the photos, and yet, there was an undeniable maturity in her that set her apart from her peers. If working with vehicles truly held such significance for her, you couldn’t help but wonder how it must have felt to have chosen a path that seemingly contradicted her deepest desires.

TO BE CONTINUED....

HELPLINES:

If you are a victim of sexual abuse, assault or domestic violence or know someone who is please reach out to these links that share helpline services, phone numbers or emails. Consent and respect is important in every relationship whether between friends, family or even strangers.

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#clark kent x you #clark kent x black!reader #clark kent x reader #clark kent x female reader #dead dove do not eat #dead dove fic #slowburn #slow burn

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skeelly · 11 months

Text

"trust that you betrayed, confusion that still lingers"

i see you've decided to suffer by checking my blog so-

hi! welcome to my blog! :)

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉

: ̗̀➛ i usually post about: taylor swift, sometimes one direction, books i haven't actually finished, rarely rants, sometimes harry potter/other shows I've watched and honesty just anything i see on my feed.

: ̗̀➛ i love/enjoy: taylor swift, olivia rodrigo, claire rosinkranz, conan gray, one direction and all it's members, harry potter, HORSES, writing//reading, money, poetry, football//soccer (sports in general), memes or anything funny, painting my nails, that one guy in my sister's class, being annoying and most importantly the sturniolo triplets.

this is a safe place for everyone!

@crysten is my second acc that i has no value and use. if you know me irl, i suggest you just stop looking at my blog :)

: ̗̀➛ things about me: my name is kristen. i go by she/her. im from the philippines. im a capricorn. intp-t. its hard for me not to make typos cause i send messages without thinking twice. i hate school. if we don't count online friends then im practically friendless. im in a science curriculum but can't understand physics. i love writing. i can fluently speak 3 languages but i want to speak more. i look like an absolute mess no matter the time. im 100000% ambivert. i don't like people who can't work the same pace as me (i know that's toxic, i swear im trying to fix it). my birthday is after christmas. i embarrass myself in ways not even god thought would be possible. im a confusing little biatch so im sorry. OBVIOUSLY, i live off of pinterest and i guess tumblr. proper grammar = non existent. i will give you anything you want, just give me a horse and grayson hawthorne. i love making friends so please don't feel shy to interact with me and i am a minor so please don't be weird <3

i reblog my posts to my other acc because im funny and yes, i keep adding to this intro because i find this thing fun and im kinda bad at keeping up with posts im mentioned in, so im sorry if i dont reply. oh and this intro is heavily inspired by @svnflowermoon & @stvrlighhttt <3

: ̗̀➛ some special people:

@mqstermindswift @stvrlighhttt @remingtonreputation13 @what-about-wendy @dumbass-lesbian @themidnightarcher @astraeasparrow @dandelions-fly-in-summer-skies @lucinda-008 @niallermybabe @coco6420 @atwtmvftvtvsgavralpss @swiftieannah @reminiscentreader @hathorneheiress @xyzinthearea-1 @glitterfuturisticmortally @blocked-zombieartist @philomenacunkstan1 @real-human-shana-nicole @newromanticslut @holdmyteaplease @my-mind-is-frozen @zuzanna-jadw1ga @starchasers-stuff @chilipowder9 @iwanttomarrynoahshaw @evermore-4-life @lovliestars @urbanflorals @sl33py-angel @antlerbullets @rohza-is-a-bit-gay @mickeywheeler @reyna-obsessed @13callisto @nqds @maketheshadowsfearyou @crowgenius @in-a-state-of-crisis @cc-horan @bookishswiftie1989 @ava-taylors-version @pranav03 @thislifeissweeterthanfiction @mickeywheeler @waiting-down-the-hall-for-me (apparently i reached the max ments on a post)

SERIOUSLY, IF YOU KNOW ME IRL, STOP LOOKING AT ME BLOG.

: ̗̀➛ dni: racists//homophobes//proshippers//does not stand with palestine//over 30 (respectfully)

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canirove · 4 days

Text

Rice, Rice, baby | Chapter 29

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

“Thank you very much for this trip, Declan.”

“You're welcome” he smiles.

We've been on the road for a while now, and things haven't been awkward between us after what happened the night before. And with that, I mean the best make out session ever, and we've shared a few.

Once we managed to break apart we just went to our rooms, both of us smiling like idiots. And in the morning while having breakfast, we still were like that. Smiling and feeling in cloud nine, enjoying our last moments together before having to go back to the real world and talk about what all those kisses meant and whatever he also wanted to tell me last night.

“Also, the playlist you made is so good. Banger after banger, no skips. Well, maybe just… Careful!” I scream when a car suddenly invades our side of the road.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“Olivia!” my mum says, storming into the room. “Oh, Olivia.”

“Hello, mum” I reply while she hugs me as if her life depended on it.

“How are you? Are you alright? And the baby? When the hospital called us and told us that you had been in a car accident I feared the worst.”

“We are fine, mum. Don't worry.”

“Then why are you keeping you here?” she asks.

“They want to make sure I don't go into early labour. It apparently can happen after big moments of stress.”

“And what is he doing here?”

“Oh, dad. I hadn't seen you there with mum squeezing me” I say with a nervous laugh.

“I'll ask again, darling. What is Declan Rice doing here?”

“What?” my mum says, finally letting go of me and looking around the room. “Olivia, what…”

“I… He… I…” I mumble, trying to look for an excuse. Can the bed open and swallow me? Please? Or maybe the baby could choose to come now. Anything to avoid giving them an answer.

“I was the one driving” Declan says, the tone of his voice making me look at him and stop freaking out. I think I had only heard him talk like that in interviews after big defeats, when he's on captain mode.

“You were doing what?” my dad says.

“Driving the car, sir.”

“So the accident was your fault?”

“What? No!” I say. “Declan actually acted super fast and thanks to him nothing serious happened to any of us, the other driver included.”

“You still hit a tree, tho” my dad says, his eyes fixed on Declan.

“Better that than the other car” I reply.

“But why was he driving, Olivia?” my mum asks. “Weren't you going away with Kennedy?”

“I… I… I lied” I say, that last word almost a whisper.

“You lied? Why?”

“Because… Because I…”

“Olivia, were you away with him?” my dad asks. He's used my name, he hasn't called me darling. And he only does that when he is angry with me. Shit.

“I… yes?”

“Are you dating him?” he asks again. He still hasn't looked at me, he only has eyes for Declan.

“No.”

“Then why were you away with him?”

“Because… Because I… We…”

“Olivia, stop rambling and answer me” he says, finally looking at me. Though I wish he hadn't, because I had never seen him this mad and it is scary as hell. “Why were you away with Declan Rice?”

“Because… Because he's the baby's father.”

“Olivia!” my mum gasps.

“Is that true, boy? Are you the father?”

“Yes, sir” Declan says, taking my hand on his and giving it an encouraging squeeze, the confidence on his voice making me once again look at him. He is standing like he always does before a game, all serious and focused. I usually find that super attractive, and despite the circumstances, the feeling hasn't changed. It probably is stronger than ever. Because there also is some… protectiveness in him. Something that tells me that everything will be ok and that nothing will happen to me or the baby as long as he is there.

“Let's go” my dad says, turning his back to us.

“What? Where?”my mum asks with a confused look.

“Home.”

“We can't go home, Louis. What if Olivia goes into labour?”

“I don't care.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“I don't care” he repeats. “She's betrayed me. Us.”

“What are you talking about?”

“She got pregnant from an Arsenal player!” my dad says, looking at us again. “That baby has blood from the enemy!”

“Oh, c'mon, dad! Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously! And as if that wasn't enough already, you've been lying to us for months, Olivia. Making us believe that Alex was the father, making us imagine a future where both our families finally become one as we've always dreamed of, playing with our feelings. You lied to us all, and that's something unforgivable.”

“All that is Alex's fault! I was planning on explaining everything, but he told you I was pregnant before I was ready and then lied about being the father because I hurt him when I said no to being his girlfriend. He was bitter and jealous of Declan and did it all for revenge!”

“Alex would never do something like that” he says.

“Oh, so you now believe him over your own daughter?”

“He hasn't hidden from her parents that she was dating a fucking gooner and that she was stupid enough to let herself get knocked up!”

“There is no need to yell or insult her, sir” Declan says.

“Oh, you shut the fuck up, you bastard!”

“Louis! He is the father of your grandson, show some respect!” my mum says.

“He is nothing to me. None of them are anymore. So when they let you go…” he says, looking at me. “Don't come to us. You are not welcomed in our house.”

“You can't be serious, dad” I say, tears starting to roll down my cheeks.

“You are not welcomed, Olivia. Neither of you are” he says, looking at Declan before walking away and leaving the room.

“Dad… Dad!” I cry.

“Don't listen to him, Olivia… Liv” my mum says, cupping my face and making me look at her. “Don't listen to him. He is saying that because he's angry and hurt, but he loves you more than anything. You and the baby. He just needs time to process it all. We all do” she says, looking at Declan.

“Rose!” I hear my dad call for her from outside.

“I better go. But Olivia… We love you. Both of us. Never forget that.”

“Ok” I sob.

“Will you take care of her?”

“Of both of them, ma'am” Declan says.

“Thank you. I know you are a good boy, and Louis knows it too, but… Football” she sighs. “You know how intense it can get.”

“I know, ma'am.”

“Call me when they send you home, Olivia. And please take care of her, Declan. She'll need you.”

“I will, ma'am. You have my word.”

“Please call me Rose. We are family now, aren't we?” she smiles. “And I better go. I love you, Olivia.”

“I love you too, mum.”

“Ok…” she says, kissing my head and then caressing my bump before leaving.

“Declan…” I whisper when the door closes behind her.

“It's ok, Liv” he says, sitting on the bed and hugging me, the feeling of his arms around me being what finally breaks me and makes me start crying like a baby. “I promise you I'm not going anywhere, that I'm not going to leave you alone. I'm with you, Liv. I'm with you now and always, you hear me? Now and always.”

#declan rice #posting a dramatic chapter the day he's finally given us model Declan feels weird 😂#declan rice fanfic #declan rice x reader #declan rice imagine #football fanfic #football imagine

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jjasen · 1 year

Note

hey babes! how do you feel about writting something inspired in taylor swift lyrics "i pictured you with other girls in love and threw up on the street" with maybe drew/rafe making fun of her in a cute? way? <3

of course!! i wasn't sure how to incorporate rafe making fun of her but i hope this is ok? characters are aged up as always ❀

Hand in hand with your friend Olivia, you swayed along to the electric beat of the thumping music. She had somehow persuaded you and Rafe to come check out the new club that had opened a few weeks ago, because apparently curling up on the couch with Rafe to watch Gilmore Girls for the sixth time did not count as legitimate Friday night plans.

It had taken a few drinks before you were able to fully immerse yourself in the crowd, shoulder-to-shoulder with complete strangers and a sheen of sweat shimmering atop your cheekbones. But now, with the rush of liquid warmth flowing through your body, you swung your hips, uninhibited, a smile floating across your lips.

Your vision hazy, you glanced over your shoulder, looking for Rafe, who had wandered off a few minutes ago to get you another drink. The familiar figure of the tall blond caught your eye and you opened your mouth to call out Rafe's name, but stopped as you saw the girl beside him, her arms slung around his neck as they shimmied to the music.

His wanton gaze devoured her as his hands skimmed over her lush curves. The sight, combined with the strobing lights of the club and deafening pulse of the music made your ears ring as your heart sank to your stomach, and time seemed to freeze.

A tap on your shoulder startled you and you whirled around to find Rafe right behind you.

"Hey, baby, sorry that took so long," he murmured into your ear, just loud enough to be heard over the crowd.

"What- I just-," you stammered, confused, looking back over your shoulder at the pair who had, for a moment, nearly shattered your soul. The blond was now facing you, and you realized that it hadn't been Rafe at all - the shade of his hair was not quite the sandy gold of Rafe's, the crescent of his mouth entirely wrong as he leaned down to say something to the girl, who erupted into laughter.

Still, the pit of dread that had settled in your chest hadn't dissipated, and all traces of the alcohol-infused carefreeness faded from your mind. The club now felt oppressively packed, the music overwhelmingly thunderous. Rafe must have sensed your unease, asking if you wanted to leave. At your nod yes, he quickly pulled aside Olivia to say goodbye and his hand settled protectively around your waist as you two walked to his car.

Your stomach churned and you felt feverish as you rolled down your window, needing to feel the cool night air. Hot tears brimmed through your lashes and you wiped at them angrily, a strange sense of humiliation bubbling up and burning your throat. It wasn't even him, you reminded yourself. Rafe wouldn't do that to me. Not ever.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong?" Rafe glanced over at you, his blue eyes full of concern, and reached over to squeeze your hand. You flinched away from his touch, almost imperceptibly, but still, Rafe noticed. He always did. Pulling over to the side of the road, he turned to you and dug through center console to find a pack of tissues.

You shook your head as you dabbed at your eyes. "It's stupid," you mumbled, looking down at your lap.

"Clearly, it's not," he said. "And even if it was, I don't care. Nothing is stupid when I'm with you."

A sound somewhere between a sniffle and a choking laugh escaped your mouth. "It's just- I saw this guy dancing with another girl, and I thought it was you, and I just about threw up picturing you with somebody else," you said, ducking your head. "There. I told you it was stupid."

Rafe frowned, a little furrow forming between his brows. "Well, first of all, that isn't stupid," he began. "But baby, I would never do that to you, and I hope you know that, and I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like- like you weren't enough for me, or anything like that."

"No, no, it's nothing like that," you said, smiling softly. "It just hit different, you know? Because it's you."

Rafe let out a low chuckle. "I wouldn't even look at another girl when I could be looking at you," he said, reaching for your hand and squeezing it. "But seriously," he said, his gaze burning into you intensely. He reached out to brush his thumb over your jaw. "I love you. You're the best thing that's ever been mine."

#rafe x you #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x reader #rafe fanfiction #rafe obx #rafe cameron #rafe cameron x you #jjasewrites

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novaksupremacy · 18 days

Text

The Veiled Law of Attraction - Chapter 11

chapter surrounds the events of S6E16 "Ghost" Mostly angst, if not just 40 MS Word pages of the absolute angstiest angst that a lesbian could angst and like a small fluffy, almost smut but not really scene in between. I'm really sorry this took over a month to get to you, but I will make another post explaining why. <3

Pairing: Casey Novak x Olivia Benson, Olivia Benson x Alex Cabot, Alex Cabot x Casey Novak

Word Count: 9544

by PKJ aka @novaksupremacy

Read Part 10

The alarm went off and Casey shot up bleary eyed. Another night on the sofa in her office had left her with a stiff neck and a migraine. This was the kind of thing she used to rely on Olivia to help with, but she guessed she’d have to rely on some good old-fashioned over-the-counter pain relievers. She brought her hand up to rub the back of her neck when the door opened.

“Oh, I— I can come back.” Of course it would be Liv. Olivia “Haven’t Seen or Heard from Her Since She Left Her Key on The Counter” Benson.

Casey cleared her throat, “It’s fine, you need something?” She couldn’t bring herself to make eye contact.

The brunette held up the stack of files in her hand, “I just had to drop off these fives. I didn’t think you’d be here.” She looked over at the couch to see the blanket all sprawled out. “Casey did you sleep here?”

The redhead scoffed, “You don’t get to ask me that Olivia.” Her face went flush, her heart racing.

“I—I’m sorry you’re right.” The detective hung her head and turned to leave. She stopped right before she hit the doorway and turned around, “Casey, I—”

The ADA looked up at her, lip trembling, “You what? Led me on? Decided I wasn’t what you wanted?” Her face dropped, “Is this because I told you that you were my—”

“No of course not,” Liv interjected. “Casey I care about you more than you know and that’s why I left.”

“Olivia that doesn’t even make any sense. I thought I meant something to you. How can you say you care and then leave without a word. Not even an ‘It’s done’” the attorney felt a single tear roll down her face that she quickly wiped away.

“Because the minute I saw you—” she walked towards Casey, it was clear she had been crying for a while. “I wouldn’t have been able to walk away. Please just know I’m doing this to protect you. Please.” The brunette wanted to reach out and grab her so badly and hug her until everything felt better, until all of the cracks and breaks in both of them healed. “I—I gotta get back.”

The redhead nodded and motioned towards the door. She looked down at her cold coffee from last night and sighed, rubbing her face. The counselor checked herself in the mirror of her office bathroom and brushed her teeth before locking up and heading out to the street towards the coffee cart.

“Large black coffee and a bagel please?” she said, the vocal fry from lack of sleep apparent.

“You okay Ms. Novak?” Paulo the coffee cart attendant asked her, “You sound like you might be getting a cold. Here.” He handed her a small container of what seemed to be some kind of soup, “On the house Ms. Novak.”

“No Paolo it’s okay I just didn’t sleep well, I’m fine I promise.” She tried to hand the container back to him, which he promptly dismissed and waved her off. “Thank you.” She mouthed with a small smile that made her dimple show.

“Casey?” She heard her name being called from the street. The redhead looked up to see Elliot walking towards her in his peacoat and newsboy hat. Shit. He jogged the rest of the way to catch up with her. “Hey Case,” he looked at her with sad eyes, not something she was used to from Stabler. He was usually so—stoic.

“Elliot don’t,” She didn’t know if he was going to try to defend Liv or tell her he was sorry, but she couldn’t handle either right now. As hard as she tried to fight it her lip jutted out and started to shake.

“Case,” he wrapped his arms around her, “Hey breathe kiddo, let’s go in your office okay?” She nodded and followed him inside. He closed the door behind them as she put her food and coffee down on her desk. Elliot sighed and leaned up on the arm of her sofa, “What happened?”

“I was hoping you knew?” she laughed sarcastically. “She’s “protecting me”.” She mocked Liv using air quotes.

“From what?” Stabler squinted.

“Fuck if I know. This all started when she put me in that chokehold—” Casey started to explain.

“She did what?!” Elliot jumped off the couch, jaw clenched, ready to tear into his partner.

“El stop it wasn’t like that.”

“Then enlighten me Casey because that sounds pretty bad.” The redhead could practically see steam coming out her friend’s ears.

“It was about two weeks ago with the Lucas Biggs case. She saw that storage locker and she was having a night terror. It scared me, I tried to wake her up and when I did she put me in a chokehold—but she was still sleeping El. Yeah, when I finally got her up, I freaked out for a minute, and I yelled but I know that’s not Liv.” She walked up closer to Elliot her arms folded and sighed, “but after talking to Avery she just kept talking about how she might be a monster, that some kind of switch might flip?” The ADA scrunched up her face.

Stabler grimaced, “That explains why she asked me if I was worried about how my kids would turn out.”

Casey still looked confused, “What do your kids have to do with this El?”

Elliot popped up and wrapped one arm around Casey and kissed her forehead, “It’s not my story to tell Novak. All I can do is try to get her to tell you. Okay?” He stepped back and placed his hand on the doorknob.

The attorney hesitantly shook her head, “Yeah, okay.” She choked out.

*****

After processing two crime scenes, the first the office building of Elaina Brevet, and second their home where her husband, Jason Brevet, was found brutally slain in much the same many. Tortured with slashed throats. Upon further investigation CSU found that Jason was tortured for the combination to the upstairs safe which according to O’Halloran’s new fancy technology was missing quite a large sum of money.

“The Brevet’s are financial managers,” Cragen briefed Liv and Elliot as they passed the holding cell and into the bullpen, “Now why not invest the cash? Money in a safe doesn’t earn interest.

“Maybe they were hiding it from the IRS?” Elliot suggested.

“Or their creditors,” Fin joined in from across the room, “I got the Brevet’s financials. Both houses mortgaged to the hilt. Credit card debt in the six figures. Maybe living large, they got in over their heads.”

Liv cocked her head, “Why not pay off their bills with all that cash?”

“Because then they would have to explain where it came from.” Munch called out from behind them as he hung up the phone. “I had the forensic accountants go over their books. Brevet Investments is nothing but a high ended pyramid scheme.”

Liv raised her eyebrows, “So all of those huge profits from the past year were phony?”

“Yeah,” Munch shrugged his shoulders, “they take the money from one client, pay another’s dividends, take the rest for themselves.”

“So,” Elliot pondered, “one of their investors got pissed off bad enough to kill em.”

Munch nodded, “yeah the kind you don’t want to piss off in Cali and Bogota.”

“Drug money?” Finch questioned.

“Yeah,” John sighed looking at the records, “and skimming it too, for one client in particular—for one company in particular too out of Vegas called Casa Vega enterprises.”

Finn creased his brow, “Drug lord finds out somebody’s ripping him off, he’d have to hit him quick to set an example.”

“Check with narcotics,” the captain chimed in. See if Casa Vega rings any bells.”

“You got it Cap,” Finn said grabbing his jacket as he motioned to Liv and Elliot, “I got a guy over there we can trust.”

As they head out Finn and Elliot lead the way chit chatting about different cases as Liv fell behind trying to get her arm in the sleeve of her jacket. “Oh, shit, sorry.” She muttered, timing would not be her friend in this moment. As she stopped Casey opened the door to her office and the two women just about collided. The redhead dropped the stack of paperwork in her arms. They both bent down trying to scoop up the mess, “Leave it to me to find another way to ruin your day.” She let out a half-hearted chuckle as she tried to make light of the awkward situation.

“Yeah, you’re uh, getting kind of good at that.” Casey teasingly chided, as she scooped up the rest of her papers. She caught a hint of Liv’s perfume, and her heart jumped into her throat. She missed her something awful and being this close to her was killing her. The smile faded from her face when she remembered she wasn’t really privileged to this familiar feeling with the detective, and she stood up. “I—have to get back to work.” The counselor cleared her throat and looked down, “Be careful out there.” She mumbled and disappeared back into her office. She leaned up against the other side of the door, clutching her files to her chest and began to sob. The tears rolled down the file jackets as she tried to stifle her cries.

Fin and Elliot watched the exchange from the end of the hallway as Olivia stood frozen in place, broken. The brunette could hear Casey crying and it was destroying her. She knew this was her own doing, but she couldn’t stop herself from still being in love with Casey.

“Something going on with the lovebirds?” Finn looked at Elliot with uncertainty.

Elliot sighed and shook his head, “Liv called it off, Casey is devastated. I’m still trying to figure out what happened.”

“Awh shit, I was rootin’ for those two.” Finn said as the brunette walked up.

“Rooting for who?” The detective raised her eyebrow at her coworker as she approached, she pushed her jacket back to stuff her hands in her pockets.

“Uhh, Eddy Curry and Stephon Marbury, thought they were gonna take the lead in points this season.” Detective Tutuola spat out extemporaneously.

Liv pursed her lips together and nodded her head slowly as if she only half believed him. “We ready?”

*****

After meeting Mike at a diner he explained to them how the money laundering scheme for Casa Vega worked and how they get others to write checks for investments with sob stories and then pay the investor back with cash. After reviewing the list he recognized a name and decided to tag along for the questioning as a favor to Finn since he was familiar with the perp. Just as Mike had suspected she did in fact write checks to Casa Vega in exchange for cash but was more than willing to give up a name in exchange for lighter punishment for a family member doing time in Sing-Sing.

When they arrived at the apartment, Mike and Elliot kicked in the door. There was an eerie silence that is usually only found in an abandoned apartment.

“Guess no one’s home.” Mike shrugged as they began their sweep. “Senor Montoya! Policia!” He called out.

“Mr. Montoya! Police!” Liv called out behind him.

As they made it passed the threshold, Elliot peered over the couch to see a man and a woman lying face down, shot execution style. He leaned over to check for vitals. “Dead.”

Liv leaned over as well, “But not for long. The bodies are still warm.”

“In here!” Mike called out from the back of the residence.

Liv and El followed the sound of the narcotics detective’s voice to one of the bedrooms, where they found him standing next to a twin-sized bed. A small child lay with a pillow over their face. A gunshot burn visible in the pillow’s cover.

“Bastard kills a kid,” Mike said in horror, “doesn’t even have the balls to look at him.” He picked up the pillow to get a better view and assess the scene, revealing a small boy.

Liv looked away, but to everyone’s shock the child began to groan.

“He’s alive! Call a bus!” the narc exclaimed.

Stabler shook his head, “It’ll be faster if we take him in.” Mike nodded and scooped the child up and headed for the door.

*****

“Is he awake?” Liv asked after getting the all clear from the ER doctor that the child had survived. “We’d like to see him.”

The doctor nodded, “Right this way.”

Liv and Mike walked into the room quietly as possible, “Hey there,” she smiled at the little boy. “I’m Olivia, what’s your name?” she spoke softly.

The small child kept his face turned away from the detectives, fidgeting with his fingers nervously.

The brunette looked at her fellow detective as he stepped up next to her, “Maybe he doesn’t speak English? Why don’t you go ahead.”

“Hola.” Mike smiled, the boy hearing something familiar turned his head towards them. “Como te llamas?” The young child didn’t answer but rather stared blankly. The detective saw the chain around his neck and picked it up gently to examine it. “Ah, San Antonio. Es este tu santo?” to which the child nodded timidly. “His name is Antonio after the saint.” Mike told Liv and then smiled kindly at him.

“Antonio mi llamo Miguel, soy policia.” Sandoval placed his hand on his chest and leaned down to the boy.

Antonio looked at him in a panic, “Mi mama y papa?”

Mike kneeled down next to him, “Bueno, Antonio…tu mama y papa.”

“Papa Dios se los llevo al cielo.”

Mike turned to look at Liv, “He says God took them to heaven.”

Liv pursed her lips, “Ask him why?” she encouraged.

“Porque Papa Dios hiz eso?” the narc detective inquired.

“Para salvarles el dolar. Porque le hizo dano a mi mama y papa.” Antonio replied, still barely speaking above a whisper.

Mike translated for Olivia, “To save them their pain, he was hurting them. Quien Antonio?”

“El fantasma.” The boy answered.

Mike looked confused from the young boy to Liv, “He’s saying a ghost shot him…I think he’s still out of it.”

Liv’s beeper went off as he spoke, “Okay,” she sighs softly, “Stabler needs us at the ballistics lab.” She smiled empathetically at Antonio as she headed for the door.

Mike rubbed his arm, “Adios Antonio.”

*****

Stabler and O’Halloran already had quiet to compilation of evidence to present when Liv and Mike walked through the door. Elliot didn’t even wait for a greeting to start talking, “Ballistics results from the Montoya homicides, take a look.”

Liv squinted at the screen as Ryan began explaining what she was looking at, “On the left, the bullet taken from Mrs. Montoya. Three twists and a left groove. On the right, the slug taken from Mr. Montoya.”

The brunette looked at him slightly puzzled, “Same gun it would make sense that they’re identical?”

“Yeah,” O’Halloran murmured preoccupied, “Now look at this.”

“It’s a perfect match.” Mike chimed in, “Same triple twist, is that the bullet from Antonio’s bed?”

“No.” Ryan answered sternly, his face contorted in concentration. “From an unsolved homicide.”

“What case?” Liv asked?

Ryan pressed a button on his keyboard to pull up the case file and the brunette woman’s blood ran cold. There she was— in the photo that was on her city issued ID, the one sitting buried in the bottom of a box in Liv’s closet along her ADA badge, Alex Cabot. A face and a memory she tried hard to push down whenever someone brought her up, too painful to keep reliving. A twist of fate.

“The Murder of Alexandra Cabot.” Elliot said out loud. Liv still lost in a trance.

“Who’s that?” Mike asked as the beautiful woman did not seem familiar to him.

Liv stared at Alex’s picture for a few more seconds and finally opened her mouth to speak, “Our old ADA.” She couldn’t seem to wipe the shocked expression off her face.

*****

Casey stood in the doorway to her office as the three detectives walked past, she wanted to try and grab Liv if only for a second, try and talk. She kept holding out that whatever had a death grip on Liv would soften and that they could fix things. She had also heard about Antonio and wanted to check on the child. “Hey Liv,” she muttered quietly, “You got a sec.”

Olivia didn’t even stop to look at her, her face paler than Casey had ever seen it, “Maybe later Case, I can’t right now.” And continued towards the bullpen.

Casey looked towards Elliot, “What’s wrong with her? She looks like she’s seen a ghost?”

Elliot stopped and sighed, “Something like that. The bullets from the Montoya homicides? They match an open case. Cabot’s case.”

The redhead’s face softened, “Oh.” she said breathlessly. She didn’t know the specifics of it all, but she knew they were close. She was also quite fond of Alex herself, they were a few years apart at Harvard and she started White Collar around the time Alex started as the ADA for sex crimes. She’d like to think what they had was akin to friendship.

“We’ll talk in a bit kid.” He nodded at her and squeezed her shoulder as he headed off towards the squad room.

Cragen was already adding Alex to the crime board, “Alexandra Cabot was prosecuting a rapist who worked for Cesar Valez the Norco baron. Valez ordered the hit on Cabot and blew up D.E.A. agent Tim Donovan, who was working the case with us.” He looked towards Stabler.

Elliot picked up from here, “Ballistics match to the weapon used in the Cabot homicide is our link between Velez and the Brevet-Montoya murders.”

Liv felt like she was reliving the events of the Zapata case all over again. She wanted to vomit but instead cleared her throat to speak, “And we believe Elena and Jason Brevet embezzled a couple million dollars from Caser Velez. Sergio Montoya was working as their middleman. When Velez found out he was getting ripped off, he ordered the hit.”

Finn jumped in at this point, “And the hit man was good. He left zero forensic evidence at the Brevet and Montoya homicides.” He turned his eyes to Munch, giving him the signal it was his turn to contribute to this round robin rundown.

“Our best lead is the security footage from Brevet investments,” John stated, “We’ve excluded over two hundred employees, messengers and janitorial staff. We have about seventy-five subjects left to identify.”

“We got a lot of names,” the captain sighed staring at the board. “All the employees at Brevet Investments, everybody involved in the money laundering scheme. Somebody has got to connect back to the Cartel.”

The narc detective nodded as he soaked in all the information, “D.E.A. can help us out with that, their HIDTA computers are programmed to find links between cases.”

“Good.” Cragen retorted, “Get over to HIDTA. Run every name we got.” The captains eyes were somber as he looked over at two of his strongest detectives, he knew how close they were with Cabot. Hell, even he was warmhearted of the ADA. If they could finally get justice for her murder, he was going to make it happen.

“Yes sir.”

*****

After a brief visit to HIDTA Liv, Elliot and Mike almost left empty handed until upon leaving Mike mentioned that the person they were chasing really was a ghost.

The technician turned around and said, “What’d you say?”

“Our kid witness,” Mike nodded, “said a ghost killed his parents.”

The HIDTA tech tilted his head, “Did he say it in Spanish? El Fantasma?

“Why that mean something to you?” Liv asked as she pulled her jacket back on.

“El Fantasma. The Ghost. Contract Killer. Liam Connors.”

*****

Liv and Mike went back to visit Antonio again to make sure he could identify The Ghost if he were to see him again. He could, at least he was pretty sure he could. Upon learning this they headed out to meet Elliot and see if they could locate El Fantasma.

“Munch just got something,” Liv said snapping her phone closed and walking towards Stabler and Sandoval. “Rent-a-car parked in a loading zone outside Brevet Investments got a parking ticket late Friday night.”

“Liam Connors rented the car?” Elliot said as he turned around and headed towards the sedan.

“No,” the brunette shook her head, “it’s a Bronx guy by the name of Doyle Shanahan. Fundraisers for the IRA in bars around New York.” She opened the passenger door while Stabler jumped behind the wheel and Sandoval swiftly slid into the back seat.

“Where can we find him?” Mike inquired.

“Works in a warehouse downtown.” Liv stated buckling her seatbelt hastily. Her partner pulled out into traffic as they took off on a Ghost hunt. The three detectives burst into the warehouse to confront Shanahan, pressing him until he finally gave up Connors. While resistant, the minute he heard Connors had turned to the cartel he had no problem ratting him out.

“Fuel Depot. Over in Gowanus, on the canal.”

From there the race was on to capture Connors. The detectives sped to Jersey calling in backup along the way.

“Go! Go! Go! Go!” an ESU member yelled and slammed the door down with a battering ram.

As everyone rushed the building a man racing towards the stairs caught Liv’s attention. “Connors!” she called out to alert the team. Elliot and Mike took after the suspect on foot chasing him down along the canal as Benson jumped in the sedan. “We’re in pursuit of Liam Connors! Headed south along the canal! Headed south!” She hollered over the radio.

Liam managed to clock Stabler hard with a two by four knocking him off his feet and knocking the wind out of him before taking off. A miscalculated turn into a car lot got him jammed up as he was corned by Sandoval from one side and Olivia pulling up from the other in the sedan. Stabler catching his breath followed close behind and was able to with great satisfaction slap cuffs on Connors and place him under arrest.

*****

Connors was tossed into a line up where Antonio was able to identify him with ease. Afterwards Liam was taken to interrogation, he sat smug, convinced he was going home. Elliot smirked as he leaned down and let the Irishman know that they did have a witness and that he wasn’t quite as good at his job as he thought.

The idea was to arraign Connors as soon as humanely possible to keep him from hurting anyone else. Mike and Liv went pick up Antonio the next day from his relative’s on Staten Island to have him testify and get Liam on his way up to Riker’s before he even knew what hit him. Liv didn’t want to be bitter, but she was, she was reeling, knowing that Connor’s was the reason she lost Alex, but more presently the reason she’d have to see Casey in court. She’d have to see the hurt in the redhead’s eyes and on her face and she just wasn’t sure she could bare it.

****

“Where the hell have you been?” Casey snapped as Liv and Elliot rushed into the courthouse.

“Being shot at.” Liv said faintly yet vexed.

The redhead’s face immediately softened to an expression of distress. “What.” She managed to croak out?

“There was a drive-by attempt on Antonio, one of the bullets nicked Sandoval and we ended up at Mercy.” Elliot sighed.

The ADA’s face dropped as she tried not to let her eyes well up with tears, she turned towards her ex-girlfriend, “Olivia I’m sorry.” she said almost breathlessly.

“It’s fine Casey, you couldn’t have known.” Liv shook her head, “We better get inside.”

The prosecutor hurriedly pushed open the swinging doors to Trial Part 22 and ambled towards the prosecutor’s table.

Preston looked particularly perturbed as the ADA and detectives entered the courtroom. “You’re late Ms. Novak, its 3:15.”

Casey dropped her briefcase onto the table and took a deep breath, trying to sound as professional as possible. “I’m sorry your honor I was in the Grand Jury. They just indicted the defendant on all counts.”

Kressler scoffed, “Fifteen minutes too late.”

“There was an attempt on the eyewitness’ life. I think witness tampering is grounds for an extension.” The ADA rolled her eyes at the defense.

Kressler threw his hands up in protest, “My client’s been on Rikers. He didn’t shoot anyone. And I’m betting you don’t have any proof of his involvement.” He wagged his finger condescendingly.

“So its just a coincidence Antonio Montoya was shot at on his way to testify against the defendant?” Casey argued, her lip curled in mild annoyance.

The opposing counsel chuckled and shook his head, “You can call it whatever you like. You still can’t connect Mr. Connors to the shooting of your witness.”

“I’m sorry, Ms. Novak. I can’t grant an extension without proof of the defendant’s complicity in the shooting. The people have failed to meet the deadline. I’m ordering the defendant released until the trial.” Preston said apologetically as she banged her gavel.

Connors nodded happily with a smirk that only a guilty man could wear.

Casey slammed her hand down on the table, “Your honor Conners is a flight risk. If you let him go we will never get him back.”

“I give you my word my client will make all of his court appearances.”

“I would like something stronger than his word.” Casey retorted. Connors watched her with a clenched jaw as she demanded Preston hold him.

“I’m sorry. You’re free to go Mr. Connors.” The judge said bluntly with a bang of the gavel.

The defendant stood up and shook Kressler’s hand as Liv and Elliot hung their heads in disappointment. Elliot nodded and stood up. The ADA looked sternly at her friend, “Arrest him.” She spat out. Connors looked over in shock. “Your honor, my detectives are here to re-arrest the defendant.” The redhead stated with confidence.

“On what charges?” Kressler exclaimed incredulously.

Casey looked Preston dead in the face, “The murder of Assistant District Attorney Alexandra Cabot.” Stabler’s face dropped as he looked over at Olivia with panic.

“Your honor this is a blatant attempt to unlawfully detain my client!” Roger protested.

“Save it counselor, Alex Cabot was a friend of mine. I’ll see you both at arraignments.” Preston stood up and exited to her chambers.

The redhead nodded at Judge Preston then shot Kressler a look as if to let him know she had his ass in a sling.

Elliot snarled as him and Olivia stepped forward to cuff Connors. He scoffed at them, “You can’t prove I killed her, and the dead can’t talk.”

*****

“What the hell are you people doing?” Agent Hammond demanded as he stormed into Cragen’s office.

Don turned around when he heard the familiar voice, “Agent Hammond, most people knock first.” he said slyly.

“You should’ve called me before your detectives arrested Liam Connors for the murder of Alex Cabot.” Hammond growled.

The captain stepped towards the marshal, his patience wore thin. “Connors blew up one of you agents! I didn’t expect flowers, but I thought you’d be pleased.”

“Connor’s goes to trial,” he scoffed, “I’m called to testify. What am I supposed to do?”

“Your job.”

“That’s exactly what I’m gonna do. I just came to tell you that you’re on your own. I’m not gonna ruin my career by committing perjury.” Hammond shook his head, eyes narrowed on Cragen. “Do we understand each other Captain?”

Cragen tilted his head, perplexed but then a sudden realization hit him, “She’s alive. You son of a bitch, you stashed Alex in witness protection.”

Casey was on her way to Cragen’s office as he voiced this to the older agent. She stopped in her tracks and leaned up against the wall outside the door, her heart pounded, her head got dizzy. She felt like she was going to be sick or pass out, while it was never confirmed she felt like she lived in Alex’s shadow—both at work and with Olivia. She stood there for a moment and continued to listen.

“You didn’t know.” Hammond said in shock, “They didn’t tell you.”

The ADA didn’t even wait for Cragen to come out of his office and blow a gasket, she was going to blow it for him. She stormed down the hall as Elliot and Liv were coming back from getting lunch, “You and you.” She jerked her head motioning at each of them, “MY office, now.”

Both detectives stopped in there tracks and looked at each other confused.

“NOW.” The redhead reiterated and urged them to follow her. “What the hell were you two thinking, you hung me out to dry out there. We work together, you should’ve trusted me,” Casey closed the door to her office as she scolded Elliot. “And we—” she looked at Liv and started to choke up, “you should’ve told me.” she said quietly. “What did you think I was too green? Too fragile to understand? Did you think you needed to protect me from that too?” Her voice began to strain.

“Hey c’mon Case, let’s not do this?” Elliot tried to mediate.

Casey bit her lip and nodded before running her tongue over it to self soothe and walked to grab some files off her desk.

Liv hung her head, she knew the ADA was right.

“I’m going to need both of you back in here first thing tomorrow so we can figure out a way out of this mess you’ve created and dragged me into.”

“Case—I’m” Liv started to reach out.

“Save it, just be here tomorrow. I’ll do my best to save all of our asses.” Casey shook her head in annoyance. She turned her body and brushed passed the brunette as she left her own office in search of Cragen.

*****

Cragen and Hammond pulled up in a small beater car to a quaint house on a quiet block. Wisconsin was so—suburban. As the two men got out of the sedan and approached the door, Cragen went to knock, only for the door to swing open and a familiar face to greet him.

“What happened?” Alex Cabot asked, her blue eyes and face furrowed in concern. She ushered the men inside as Hammond did another quick sweep to make sure they weren’t followed.

After giving his old friend a brief synopsis of what had transpired in court the day before, he looked at her and exhaled, “I’m only sorry the bastard won’t have to answer for what he did to you.”

“Oh, he will.” The blonde stated without even skipping a beat. “I want him charged with my attempted murder.” Her eyes searched for a reaction from Hammond.

“You’d have to go back to testify, that’s stepping right into the crosshairs.” The marshal protested.

“For years,” Alex cut him off, “I convinced victims to face their attackers. Now its time for me to step up.” She emphasized.

“Your testimony won’t help the case, you can’t ID Connors as your shooter.” Cragen interjected with growing concern. “Alex—if you go back, they will try and kill you again.”

The stunning attorney’s mouth hung agape a moment before she spoke, now in a softer, much less argumentative tone, “I have lost—my home, my job, my friends.” Her voice cracked— because what she wasn’t saying was that she also lost her love. “My mother died, and I couldn’t go to the funeral. Liam Connors is not going to take my conscience too.”

*****

Elliot sighed, “Are we gonna need lawyers?” He paced back and forth nervously in Casey’s office the next morning. He had no idea how to get them out of this, he’d stayed up all night racking his brain and couldn’t come to a single conclusion.

“I hope not,” the redhead said picking up some case files from her desk. She smirked and looked towards the door as it opened.

Liv and Elliot turned around to find a familiar face smiling back at them.

“Alex.” Liv whispered. Casey’s gut jolted, she knew that tone, but by G-d she wished she didn’t.

Elliot smiled in surprise, “You didn’t have to come back.” He looked between her and the Marshal behind her.

“Well who else is gonna get you out of trouble,” the blonde grinned and folded her arms.

The redhead sighed, scooping up a mountain full of paperwork, “Before everyone gets reacquainted they’re waiting for us in court.” As she walked out Elliot studied her mannerisms, there was something different. He could tell as sad as she was about Olivia there was something that shifted in the young ADA’s body language when Alex entered the room. Elliot smirked softly to himself.

*****

Later on that afternoon, after Liam Connor’s had been reindicted on attempted murder as opposed to murder one, Antonio and Detective Sandoval sat in Casey’s office across from her and the office’s former resident—Alex.

“I’m really scared,” Antonio said shakily, “I don’t want to see The Ghost. He gives me bad dreams, he says he’s going to kill me.”

“He had a nightmare last night,” Mike frowned. “The Ghost had a gun in the courtroom.”

Both Alex and Casey cast an empathetic gaze on the small child. Casey pursed her lips and nodded at Antonio as the blonde listened intently. “Well, that sounds like a really scary dream.” The younger ADA said gently to the little boy.

Alex watched her intently, her mind wandering to how caring Casey was with the child. She must have fit it instantly with SVU, she’s got a knack for this.

The redhead turned towards her and smiled sweetly, almost searching for approval as she spoke, caught off guard at the way Alex watched her. “But, you know what Antonio? The ghost doesn’t have a gun anymore. ‘Cause the police took it away from him.” The older woman immediately tore her blue eyes away when they locked with Casey’s and focused back on Antonio.

“I know,” the little boy said in a small, sad voice. “Mike told me—but I still don’t want to go to court.”

Casey bit her lip nervously, there was no shot of this case going forward without Antonio’s testimony, but she had no idea how to convey that without unfairly voicing her frustrations to the young boy.

Alex took a deep breath, “I got shot, just like you.”

The younger ADA stared at the former counselor in awe, the way she had just been perceived by her a few moments before.

“By the ghost?” Antonio crumpled his brow.

“Yes.” The blonde nodded, “And I have to go to court too.”

“Are you scared?”

Alex smiled reassuringly, “A little. I get scared that he might try and hurt me again. But then I remember that I have friends to protect me, just like you do,” she nodded her head towards Sandoval, “and it makes me feel safe.”

“I wish my mom was here.” The boy looked down at floor, melancholic.

Mike frowned, “I’ll keep working with him. Come on, ‘Tonio.” He led the boy by the shoulder out of Casey’s office.

Casey took a deep breath and raised her eyebrows at Alex in shared frustration as closed the door and turned around.

“We should keep preparing my testimony.” The slightly older woman nodded, a far off look in her eyes.

The redhead should her head assuredly, “You know, we’ve gone over all my questions. I think you’re ready.” She knew Alex had to be exhausted and pushing too far could end up burning her out rather than helping.

Alex looked up as she snapped out of her daze and looked directly into Casey’s hazel green eyes, “Are you?” She said, more pointedly than she intended.

The counselor let out a small breathy scoff, her eyes grew a little dimmer, as she tried not to let it show that she was hurt. After all, she’d always looked up to Alex. Instead she opted to tilt her head and give the blue-eyed woman a knowing smile, as if to say I won’t let them hurt you.

The blonde’s face softened, she grimaced, “Casey I’m sorry. That was…out of line.”

“It must be hard to be on that side of the desk.” Casey nodded for a few seconds and then voiced softly. She tilted her head empathetically at the blonde.

“Yeah, especially when the gorgeous woman they hired to replace me is sitting on the other side of it.” She smiled, “and from what I hear she’s just as good at the job if not better.” She took her glasses down from her face and looked at the redhead.

Casey was blushing, trying not show that she was flustered, and failing miserably at it. “I—thank you Alex, that’s sweet.”

“I don’t want to go back to the hotel yet, do you mind if we just pretend we’re still working?” Alex came and sat down next to her on the sofa leaning on her elbow, positioned against the back of the sofa.

“Hey fine by me,” the redhead pulled out a bottle of scotch from next to the couch and placed it on the table with two glasses, “You drink?”

“No,” Alex shook her head, “Pour me a double.” She smirked. “So, do you like Special Victim’s? Last I heard you were in White Collar right?” she asked picking up the glass and taking a sip.

“It’s growing on me,” Casey chuckled, coddling the glass between her hands. “My first case made me try to fight Branch on the placement.” She pulled her feet up onto the couch underneath her. “But then…” she trailed off.

“Then? Well don’t leave me hanging.” The blonde teased.

“I met someone, and that helped make it easier—for a while.” Casey’s expression got sad, the emotion in her voice, raw.

“What happened?” Alex spoke softly, almost in a whisper, a note of concern in her tone.

“She left me,” the redhead cleared her throat, “suddenly too. No warning, I thought we were happy, but something spooked her. She said she was afraid she couldn’t promise me a future. Something about a switch that might flip,” Casey’s voice trailed off as she stared into nothing, “I never did quite figure out what she meant by that.” She finished the whiskey in her tumbler and poured another, offering another to Alex.

“Was it serious?” Alex was staring into the younger ADA’s green eyes, trying not to focus on the attractive woman’s lips as she spoke.

“I thought it was, I almost thought she might’ve been the one.” She took a sip and shrugged. “But then I came home one day to her key on the counter and her toothbrush missing from the bathroom. I was so in love with her,” she paused, “but I never found a way to tell her.” She swallowed off the rest of the glass and put it down on the table. “I should probably not drink anymore of that tonight.”

“For what it’s worth Casey, whoever this woman is? Her loss. You’re a beautiful woman, a talented litigator, and if I have to hear Elliot tell me how good at softball you are one more time I’m going to beg them to stash me back in witsec.” She giggled, a little tipsy and put her glass down on the table next to Casey’s. She leaned forward and brushed the redhead’s hair away from her face. “You’ll find someone who will treat you the way you deserve.”

Before Casey even realized what she was doing she leaned in and kissed Alex, who leaned into it kissing her back. It went from soft and delicate to heated in a matter of seconds. Alex pushed the younger woman back against the couch and wrapped her hand around the back of her neck, kissing her feverishly, pulling at her lip. Whiskey and sin between them. She knew there was a security detail outside of the door, so she tried her best not to breath too loudly. She slid her fingers down into Casey’s slacks and started to tease her, rubbing her over her underwear as the redhead tried to stifle the sighs and gasps.

“Alex,” she whispered, “we shouldn’t.” Her heart and her brain told her this was a terrible idea, but her body had already made its decision. “Oh, Alex.” She pulled the blonde’s lower lip, smirking as she dragged her teeth across. “Mmm.” Her head was spinning.

The blue-eyed attorney melted at the way Casey said her name, a name she hadn’t heard in so long. She was about to take the encounter further when there was a knock at the door.

“Hey, it’s Liv I’m just making sure everything is still okay in there.”

“We’re fine,” Alex called out “just finishing up some last-minute testimony questions.”

“Okay great, just let me know when you’re ready.” The brunette called through the door.

Casey’s body language changed the minute she heard it was Liv at the door. She felt sick. A wave of guilt washed over her. They weren’t together but her heart still belonged to Olivia.

“Hey you okay?” Alex looked at her, concerned.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” The ADA tried to play it off but almost immediately grabbed the trashcan and hurled into it. “Oh god this is so embarrassing, I’m so sorry Alex.”

“Hey, hey, shhh another time.” She rubbed the redhead’s back, “are you…okay? You didn’t really drink that much. You were fine until—was it something I did? I’m sorry you kissed me, and I got carried away.” She blushed.

“No, no Alex it wasn’t anything you did, you’re wonderful.” She glanced at the door and then down at the trashcan. When she leaned over the small gold chain fell loose from her shirt.

Alex squinted and then it clicked, and the blonde’s face tempered. She sighed and looked at Casey sympathetically, “It was Liv, wasn’t it?”

The redhead looked up at her bleary eyed, head still over the trash, “I—don’t know where it went wrong. And I’m so sorry, I just ruined the moment. I find you very attractive, I just heard her voice and…”

“Hey, it’s okay, another lifetime maybe.” She consoled and held her to her chest. “You’re still in love with her aren’t you?”

“It’d be so much easier if I wasn’t.” the redhead sobbed.

“I get it, I was in love with her once too. She’s hard to get over.” Alex said, rubbing her hand up and down Casey’s arm. “But back then we were both deep in the closet and then I ended up in witness protection, so it all ended up a very depressing moot point.”

“I always figured there was something between you two, she wouldn’t talk about it. Then again I thought you were dead, so I never pushed.” She gave a halfhearted laugh.

Casey stepped away for a minute into the ensuite bathroom to get herself cleaned up and brush her teeth, mouthwash, etc.

When she came out she found Alex leaning next to the door. “Just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“I am really sorry for ruining the evening.” The redhead furrowed her brow and frowned.

Alex put her hands on her waist and pulled her close until their faces were almost touching. “If you ever find yourself in another lifetime, I hope you’ll think of me.” She laid a gentle kiss on Casey’s lips and then pressed her forehead to the younger woman’s.

“Could be a while?” the redhead joked and gave a half-hearted smirk.

“Something tells me it’s worth the wait.”

*****

“I wish these windows opened, I want to smell the city.” Alex whined as she looked out on to the financial district below.

Liv chuckled, “You mean the, uh, rotting garbage and diesel exhaust.”

The blonde craned her neck and rolled it against her shoulders, it was hard to keep to her voice from breaking, “Wisconsin is so quiet at night. Sometimes when I get homesick, I hum the Mister Softee song.” She pouted as a small smile crept across her face.

The brunette laughed through her nose and scrunched her mouth to the side. She leaned her back against the large glass window and looked at Alex. It had been a very long time since she had seen her at all let alone like that, her guard down, without the power suit armor she wore to court—just sweatpants and a soft top. Olivia stared at the strands of hair that fell and framed her ex-lover’s face, everything about it familiar. She started to tear up, both out of a sense of what they had once and out of shock that in that moment when it would be so easier to fall back into past patterns—all she could think about was Casey.

“Well—you making any friends?” Liv asked quietly, her voice pained.

Alex grimaced and let out a sad chuckle. “There’s a claims adjuster, at the insurance agency where I work. We’ve been seeing each other.”

Liv smiled, her levies in her eyes were about to breach. “Good.” She whispered.

“He’s a good man, he thinks I’m from Tulsa. And when we’re in bed at night he whispers my name… ‘Emily’” her blue eyes turned down to the floor.

“It’s hard being someone you’re not,” Liv placed her hand on Alex’s arm.

The blonde turned her attention away from the window towards the brunette and let out a frustrated sigh, “Olivia, what are you doing?”

Liv pulled her hand away, “I’m sorry I wasn’t trying anything.”

Alex chuckled, “That’s not what I meant, I meant what are you doing?” The detective looked at her puzzled. “That girl is crazy about you. You know that right?”

The brunette hung her head, her voice got quiet, “I know that.” She looked up into Alex’s familiar blue eyes, “How is it you know that?”

“I haven’t been gone so long that I don’t know how to read people. The amount of pain in Casey’s eyes when she heard your voice outside that door. Olivia you broke her heart. What I don’t get, is why?”

“Things just don’t work out sometimes.” Liv shook her head and looked down at the floor.

“That’s a load of crap Olivia and you know it,” she put her hands on Liv’s shoulders and leaned down in attempt to get her to look up at her, “Hey, look at me. Why don’t you just tell her the truth? Tell her why you’re so afraid.” Both her and the brunette had tears in their eyes. “You know you’re not broken right? Olivia there isn’t an evil bone in your body.”

The brunette had tears freely falling now, “You don’t know that. I want to believe that, but I can’t stop thinking, what if we had kids? I know she wants them, we’ve talked about it. What would I pass on? What if something snaps in me and I hurt her or our potential child? It’s safer to break her heart now.” She wiped her tears away and shook her head.

“Liv, you are not your genetics, you and I have proved that in court time and time again. Don’t miss a chance at happiness over this.” She hugged her and kissed her forehead holding her lips there for a few seconds, “Or because of anything else.” She whispered.

“I’ll always love you Alex and I hope that you and I will always be a part of each other’s lives,” her voice cracked as she spoke, “but Casey, I’m so in love with her and I’m afraid it’s way too late. I really screwed up.”

“It’s not Liv, trust me.” She pulled her into a tight hug. “And I’ll always love you too and will always be your friend. No matter what.” They embraced for a while until Alex pulled back and looked at Liv caringly, “Tell her.”

“Thanks Alex. We need to get some sleep because tomorrow is a big day.” She kissed Alex softly, it wasn’t a pass, it was just a thank you for being you. “I’ll take the couch.”

The blonde stopped in the bedroom doorway and looked behind her, “By the way not only can I read body language, but I also know your badge number, Benson. She’s still wearing it.”

The next morning Alex was up before the sun, pacing around, trying not to break out in a sweat. Her nerves were definitely getting the better of her. In her furious pace she accidentally bumped the table which clanked her spoon in her coffee cup. Liv shot up on the couch gun in hand.

“Sorry,” the blonde grimaced, “Just me. I wasn’t watching where I was walking.”

The detective bolstered her weapon and rubbed her eyes, “You okay?”

“No,” Alex shook her head, “I can’t stop thinking like a prosecutor.” She took a deep, ragged breath, “Connors is going to sit in that courtroom tomorrow, looking like a choir boy.”

Liv shook her head in agreement.

“He’s going to charm the jury with his Irish brogue, and—and I have to make them see who he really is. But—” She buried her face in her hands and then threw them up in exasperation and Liv walked over to her bag. “I don’t even know what makes him tick!”

“Alex—” the brunette handed the blonde a DD-5, “you didn’t see this file.”

****

Casey tried to maintain her composure as she questioned Alex on the witness stand, trying not to think about the fact that twelve hours ago the blonde was sliding one of the delicate hands, now neatly folded in her lap, down the front of her slacks. “Finally, Ms. Cabot,” she locked on to blue eyes, placing her hand gently on the corner of the witness box, “would you describe to the jury what happened after you were shot.”

Alex searched Casey, not able to maintain eye contact, her eyes traveled to her chest, what she would have given to listen to her heartbeat for just another minute. She tried to regain her composure, her eyes now searched the redhead’s full lips as she spoke. “I woke up in the hospital,” she started finally staring back into the ADAs hazel green eyes, “The marshals were there. They told me that I was dead, officially, and that the only way they could keep me alive was in Witness Protection.”

“Thank you,” Casey smiled, trying not to give in to Alex’s stare. “Your witness.” Her face dropped as she turned towards Kessler.

“That sounds like quite an ordeal,” Roger said as he stood up, “I think we’re all very moved by your experience.”

“Do you have a question?” Alex annunciated and practically rolled her eyes at her old sparring partner.

“Only one.” Kressler spat back, “Did you see my client shoot you?”

“I saw his gun aimed at my heart.”

“Please Ms. Cabot, just answer the question.” She could hear Kressler tell her this, but her eyes were locked on Connors. His eyes deadpan, lifeless stared back. “On the night you were shot, did you see Liam Connors anywhere near the vicinity?”

“No but he’s a coward. He likes to run away.” She smirked, she knew exactly what she was doing, it was like something reignited in her blood, a second nature. “Did you leave a family behind in Ireland, Mr. Connors?” The volume of her voice spiked.

“Your honor—” Roger voiced in displeasure.

“Ms. Cabot, please.” Preston urged her to stop.

“You have absolutely no idea who shot you, do you?” Kressler’s tone started getting aggressive.

Casey furrowed her brow at Alex—What the hell is she doing, gunning for a mistrial? Don’t blow this Cabot.

“Oh, I have an idea. It’s the kind of man who likes to rape a woman to make her talk.” The former prosecutor retorted, Liam’s face contorted in anger.

“Let me rephrase, did you see Liam Connors shoot you?” Roger stepped forward putting emphasis on each word as he spoke.

“No but I know it was him.” Her teeth gritted.

“Objection your honor!”

“It takes a lot of balls to shoot an unarmed woman and a sleeping child! Too bad your aim wasn’t a little better.”

Liam stood up, his rage bubbled over, “You think you’re safe? They know where you are! You should’ve stayed dead!” he shouted as four court officers wrestled him back into his chair.

“Enough!” Preston raised her voice, “We’re in recess until Mr. Kressler can control his client. You may step down Ms. Cabot.”

Casey’s eyes went back and forth between Connors and Alex, she smirked at Alex’s mad grab and how she couldn’t believe it actually worked. Hammond jumped up to follow Alex out of the courtroom.

*****

Casey closed her eyes and held her breath as the verdict came back. A smile spread across her face as all counts came back guilty. Relief weighed heavy on Alex as she heard Liam Connors convicted on her attempted murder, something he had said earlier gave her the weary feeling that this wasn’t over.

*****

Elliot wrapped his arm around Novak as they walked down the hallway with everyone on the way to celebrate the conviction in her office.

“Guilty on all counts.” She smiled quietly, she was proud of herself even if she knew the tipping point was actually the stunt Alex pulled.

Stabler could still the sadness in her eyes surrounding recent events, “I never doubted it would be anything else.” He smiled at her like an impressed older sibling, she smiled back, thankful for him as he steered her into her office.

“Let’s get this party started.” Liv smiled as she came through the other door holding two bottles of champagne and handed one to Mike.

“Ooh, that’s what I’m talking about,” He smiled and brought the bottle over to the desk to crack it open.

Liv looked over at Elliot and Casey laughing and teasing each other. She missed the fiery redhead, the way she smelled after a shower, the way it felt to hold her against her chest after a long day, the way her kiss tasted.

“Alex knew just how to push Connors’ buttons,” Cragan brought her back from her thoughts.

“She’s a great prosecutor.” The brunette shrugged, nonchalant.

“And you gave her the ammunition.” He said softly.

She was taken aback by his comment and stayed silent as Mike handed her a glass of champagne.

“Don’t let me drink too much,” Casey teased Elliot, “Penalty face starts first thing in the morning.”

“Slam dunk,” Stabler waved her off, “Live a little tonight.” He heard a noise from the hallway, “Is that her? Is that her?” He said in a hushed but excited tone.

Everyone held up there champagne to toast Cabot as she walked through the door, smiles on all of their faces. Casey tried to quickly make herself more presentable, maybe with all of this behind them, she could see if Alex wanted to try again, maybe this time without the crying and the throwing up into the trashcan. However, smiles quickly turned to confusion as the only person who came through the door was Agent Hammond.

“Where’s Alex?” Liv asked, a sullen tone in her voice.

“Marshals are moving her and Antonio to new identities. She asked me to say goodbye.” His eyes moved from Liv unto Casey. The only person Alex had actually asked him to say goodbye to.

The redhead chewed her lip nervously as nodded, she understood the weight behind his look. As everyone turned to each other in shock he made another eye motion from Casey to her office couch. She furrowed her brow, this one she was unsure about. The nights festivities continued however bittersweetly.

“Goodnight,” the ADA sighed as Elliot hugged her and was the last one out the door. She closed it behind him and flopped back onto the couch only to jolt forward again. Her back had hit something hard, and it startled her, for a second she panicked that she may have become the new target of Connors’ and the cartel. She reached back behind the pillow and put her hand on something smooth and glass. Upon pulling it out, she found it was a significantly sized bottle of Johnny Walker Blue Label with a note attached.

Casey crinkled her forehead and tilted her head in curiosity as she opened the note which read: “For another lifetime. -A”

She couldn’t help but smirk, “Maybe so, Cabot. Maybe so.” She smiled to herself and held the note to her chest when the door swung open. The redhead sat up startled to find a distressed Olivia “Really Poor Timing” Benson standing in her doorway, one hand palming the doorframe, the other hand palming the handle.

“Can we talk?”

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