#henry just looks. sad. and maybe a little scared or tired

[wassupmygays]

"There's trouble all over this town"

via the Outsiders Instagram

[chaotic-starlight24]

I see you have requested hc requests for a pair of outsiders characters. Dally and Darry please?

Thanks so much for the request :D Dally and Darry it is!

Warnings: Spoilers, Angst towards the end

When Dally first showed up in Tulsa as a scraggly little 13 ¾ year old, Mr. Curtis told Mrs. Curtis and Darry to look out for him. So Darry tried his best to take him under his wing. Dally actually warmed up to him though it took a while. He saw him as an older brother of his own. But he never admitted that out loud since that almost always ended badly for the “older brother” of the situation.

They drifted from each other for some time though because Darry thought Dallas was becoming a bad influence on his brothers. Mainly the time when Dally fell back into the hood he was in New York. So Darry would try his best to keep Pony and Soda away from him (much to Soda’s sadness). After a couple arguments with Dally, Darry told Mrs. Curtis about his concerns. And she changed his point of view on Dally and just about every hood on the east side. It made him realize that Dally was a scared kid who had to toughen up or die. So Darry started to go a little easier on him.

Darry is actually one of the few Dally trusts. They butt heads from time to time but they also know they can lean on each other if really needed. 

Dally tries his best to help out Darry from time to time. The problem is that Dally isn’t exactly the most responsible person. Like he’ll offer to let Pony tag along with him and Johnny so Darry can get some time to do whatever, but that does mean Pony may or may not know how to gamble. Dally’s trying his best, guys.

Darry is one of the few to have heard about Dally’s siblings back in New York. Dallas hasn’t gone into a bunch of detail but most of the gang doesn’t even know Dally had a family. So for example, one afternoon Dally was just hanging out while Darry was sorting through Pony’s report cards and Dally just kinda laughed to himself, “You know, you remind me a lot of Henry.” “Who?” “Oh, nobody… He was my brother, he uh, he tried his best to get us all through schoolin’. But I neva cared much for it.”

One night while the gang was all hanging out, Dally overheard Darry talking to Two-Bit about Paul. Darry just says something like, “I miss him sometimes, but he’s not the same person anymore. I’ve heard some of the nasty stuff he’s said about me and my bro-“ That’s all it took for Dally to go storming out of the house to find Tim and his gang. Paul left his party to discover his brand new wheels missing from his car. Darry woke up in the morning to discover some real nice tires on him and Soda’s car. Dally was honestly ready to just steal Paul’s car altogether but Tim convinced him otherwise.

Before Dally really became a part of the gang, Darry wanted to help him out to find somebody who just matched his vibes. He knew Tim from random parties and from Two-Bit so he was just like “Maybe they’ll get along!”. So he took Dally for a walk and told him about this guy he thinks Dally will like and Dallas was just like “One second.” and pickpocketed a guy who walked by. That guy immediately turned around and started cursing him out and causing a fight to break out between them. Darry just stood there because “Aw crap, that’s Tim!” Darry very much believed he just gave Dally his first enemy. But after fighting they complemented each other’s fighting style and started talking. Darry left them to it and walked off.

Someone in Tim’s gang taught Dally how to drive. Darry heard Dally was learning and was like “Ok! How about you show me what you know!” Dally took hold of that wheel and Darry mentally noted to never drive with him again. Dally has since gotten a bit better but also hasn’t exactly made major improvement.

Darry tried to pick him up before Dally got similar in height to him. Dally immediately started squirming and cursing like an angry chihuahua.

Dally followed Darry and Two-Bit around a lot when he first became a part of the gang. Sure he really connected with Johnny, but it took him a bit. Steve, Soda, and Johnny were a trio that had grown up together and same with Darry and Two-Bit. So Dally was kinda the weird middle ground between them both friend and age wise. Darry and Two were always welcome to have him around but Dally still tried to keep up that cool guy persona. So on the days Darry didn’t have practice, him and Two-Bit would be walking around, chatting and laughing together. Then Dallas would be trailing a couple feet behind them, hands stuffed in his leather jacket just kinda walking along with them.

When Dally died that was the first time in a while since Darry has felt pure rage. Everything in him wanted to throw everything he had at the cops, but he knew that wouldn’t do any good. Instead he had to see Dallas lying cold on the ground. And not in a peaceful way or anything. It tore Darry apart inside to see this kid like this. This kid he has looked out for since he came to Tulsa. This kid his brother had brought into the gang. This kid who followed him and his best friend around for the first couple months. This kid who dealt with so much pain and hurt yet hid it away from his surface, keeping up with his persona. His persona that so desperately wanted to be older than he actually was, the version who could take all that has hit him. And now Darry watches as they drag a white sheet over the body and haul him away. 

[gt-jar]

G/t snippet #1

Word count: >1k

CW: near-death experience? (nothing graphic)

Henry clings to the tree for dear life. He can hear the thundering footsteps in the distance. They are getting louder, which means...

The giant is getting closer.

He bites his lip, keeping himself from sobbing loudly. He needs to stay quiet, needs to stay hidden. He can't run anymore, everything hurts. Hiding is his only chance.

If the giant finds him then...

The boy doesn't want to think about what will happen then. He just hopes that the giant will walk in a different direction, far far away from the tree he's hidding in. His hopes are crushed, when a deep voice calls out.

"Kid, please come out! I swear, I just want to help you!"

Henry flinches, digging his nails deeper into the bark of the tree. The voice is so loud. The giant must be close. Why can't he just leave him alone? Maybe he's lucky, there still is a chance that the giant will just walk by. He looks down to check and pales.

The giant is standing right under him, looking around.

Looking for him.

A whimper escapes him against his will and this is what seals his fate.The giant looks up and their eyes meet. The surprised look on his face turns into something softer.

"Hey, there you are," the giant says softly.

For the first time since spotting the human, he gets a good look at the boy, and god, he looks so frail and tiny. Way too young to be all alone. The fearful look on his face breaks the giant's heart. Knowing he's the cause for the boy's fear just makes him feel worse.

"G-go away!" the child cries, "Leave me alone!"

The giant winces. The child's reaction doesn't surprise him, but it pains him no less.

"I know you're scared, but I can't just leave you here. It's not safe. There's a storm coming up. Please let me help you."

"I don't want your help!"

The little boy sounds like he's close to tears.

All the giant wants is to scoope him up and ease his fears, but he can't reach him while he's up in the tree, and maybe that's for the best. He doubts the child would want to be comforted by him. He has to convince the boy to climb down on his own.

The giant tries a different approach.

"Do you really want to stay here? It gets really cold at night. Don't you want a warm place to sleep and a warm meal?"

This makes Henry falter. As if on cue his stomach starts to growl.

The giant smiles sadly at him.

"You must be so hungry. But you don't have to be, you can have as much food as you want, all you have to do is climb down."

The boy is conflicted. It has been three days since he ate something. Everything is so unfair. The offer sounds too good to be true. He really wants to take it, but...

"How do I know that you don't want to trick me?"

The giant makes a sad sound.

"Sweetheart, I don't know what types of horror storys you were told about me, but I can guarantee they are not true, I don't mean any harm," the giant pauses, "I know you don't believe me, but maybe there's something I can do to prove it?"

"I don't know," Henry sniffles quietly. He is too exhausted to think of something.

"That's okay. I'll just wait here until you come up with something."

The giant sits down and leans against the tree. He doesn't do anything, he just.... waits, like he said.

Henry doesn't know how much time goes by. It has started to rain a while ago. The tree shields him from the rain for the most part, the same can't be said about the giant. He's still sitting under the tree, waiting, getting all wet.

"Why are you doing this?" Henry croaks, not sure if the giant even hears him.

"I just want to make sure you're safe. You can trust me when I'm saying that you don't have to be afraid of me. How about this, you come down and I'll take you to my place. I can make you something to eat, while we wait out the storm. How does this sound?"

'Good' Henry thinks silently. He is tired, cold and so so hungry. Maybe he does need the giant's help. Without thinking about the possible consequences, the boy starts to climb down.

Suddenly a loud clap of thunder echos through the forest, startling him and causing him to slip.

He is falling.

The giant yells something, but he can't understand it over the sound of his own screams.

This is it.

This is how he'll die.

Suddenly, Henry stops falling. He collides with something solid. But it doesn't feel like the ground. He looks around and realizes that he is sitting in a pair of hands. The boy looks up and once again meets the giant's concerned eyes.

They look so warm.

"ARE YOU HURT?"

All at once Henry starts to cry, but not because he's hurt. Right now he's just overwhelmed. The stress of the last few days comes crashing down. 

He's pulled against a warm chest and is rocked back and forth. The giant is hugging him, whispering words of comfort.

"Shh, it's okay, little one. I've got you now. You're safe. Trust me, everything is going to be okay."

And this time Henry believes him.

[lannaloveit]

Action and Reaction 🔥❤️

Part 2 ⬇️

The night ends with Hyunjin returning home thoughtful, Han taking an interest in Ágata and Y/N sleeping in the guest room of Cris's house, since she offered to help clean up the mess.

The girl wakes up to a message from Han: "Look, I don't know what happened last night, but I wanted to know if you're okay." She then replies with: "Good morning Hanji, I was fine, I just found it strange to see you "moving on", spending all this time with you made me think about our past." "I understand perfectly Y/Nnie, but I need to move on, I'm tired of running after you, it was making me feel bad, I'm happy for you and Hyunjin, he seems perfect for you," Han adds.

As the days went by, she really realized that every action has a reaction, that if she does something, something will react. Y/N liked Han but was in love with Hyunjin.

Or maybe not?

She felt confused.

Maybe she did see something in Hanji, he was so similar to her, so fun, funny and it seemed like they shared the same neurons.

She used to say that he was "my alarm clock" the one that makes her wake up every day, her "reason".

Hyunjin arrived so suddenly, it was good, energizing, but as the days went by that gave way.

"You seem sad" Cris said

"I'm not, just a little confused with myself, I feel like I lost Henri and I didn't want that." "Tell me what you want from him, do you want him? Or do you want to risk Hyunjin? I've known you since you were a child, Y/Nnie, and I know that in order for you to really like and want to be with someone, you have to know them for a long time. Do you know why you were sad about his kiss with Agata? Because you trust him, because you wanted him. Think again, maybe Hyunjin only showed up to show you who you really want, because the idea of being away from him scares you. - Cris She hugs Cris and cries "Hyunjin will think I'm an idiot." "No, you just have to talk to him, and if he does, that's his problem, you have to fix things with your best friend now." "Cris, you know that you're actually my best friend, right?" Cris kisses her head and smiles.

Hanji found himself thinking about the damned “truth or dare” kiss. He *wanted* to kiss the prettiest girl in his opinion. Y/N was the prettiest girl, but he simply kissed Ágata because she was the most desired among the boys and he was afraid of what Hyunjin would do. After all, this was before he knew that Ágata was dating a college student who picked her up every day on his motorcycle after school. He felt ridiculous for thinking that she would give him a chance. But what can we expect from a girl who shows up with a different boy every week?

°

Y/N spends recess with Han and he tells her about Ágata. Honestly, Y/N knew the girl’s nature and knew that she would be bad for anyone who got involved with her. Cris comes up to them and says:

“Y/N, baby, we need to talk.” He looks serious.

“What happened?”

“*Hyunjin,* it was all a bet.

“What?” Han answers.

“I was in the bathroom and I heard him talking to Seungmin at the door about whether Hyunjin would really be able to “get Y/N” and saying that it would be easy because you “fell for his trap.” To top it off, Seungmin said that he should try too because you seem to be acting like a saint, but behind his back you were hooking up with Hanji and trying to deceive Hyunjin, so one more wouldn’t make a difference.”

“They saw that I heard because when I left I threw some truths in both of their faces. Seungmin tried to punch me, but I was faster and punched him in the face, pushed them both away and left.”

“My God…I always had a bad feeling about Hyunjin…it’s a shame I was right.”

“I’m going to kill those idiots.” - Han

“Guys, you better calm down, it’s not worth wasting your time with them, I’ve already taken care of this.”

“I need to talk to Hyunjin” -Alanna

“Be careful, pretty” -Hanji

Y/N finds Hyunjin standing at the door of their classroom

“Hi, honey” -hyunjin

“Don’t call me that, idiot”

“Calm down, why are you like this? Are you nervous because of your friend Cris? Didn’t he fuck you today?”

“Fuck you!” Y/N ends up slapping Hyunjin hard in the face, who freezes there after realizing that everyone saw it. Including the girls he picks up. How could they trust him after that? They even *filmed* it.

Cris and Han get the girl out of there before the confusion gets worse and the three of them go to the cafeteria since the class was free.

“Y/N, I don’t want to see you get into this kind of trouble anymore, I know he deserved it but you could have gotten hurt, if you need anything call me and I’ll fix it” -Cris

“Honestly, you were amazing, princess” -Hanji

Cris gives Hanji a disappointed look

“What’s wrong? I’m trying to lighten the mood” -Han

“I’m sorry but I couldn’t let him talk to me like that, I know I don’t have many female friends but that doesn’t mean I’m a bitch who sits with every boy I see, especially because the only sluts here are Ágata and Hyunjin.”

“I agree, beautiful, but it’s true, when you need it, call one of us” -Han

°

Y/N goes home with Hannie and they decide to watch a movie, but the girl feels so overwhelmed.

They go to the kitchen to make a snack and she starts to cry

"Kitty, are you crying?"

He hugs her and she rests her head on his shoulder while he strokes her back

"And is this crying from happiness or sadness?"

"It’s just that…everything has been so “heavy” lately, there’s a lot going on and I didn’t expect this to happen so I felt horrible with each passing moment. I can’t explain it, I thought he could be a light but in fact he became the darkness that I run away from so much now, I’m sure he’ll try to destroy my image. I bet on a loser dog and realized that I was the loser" - Y/N

"Think about what makes you want to stay, not what makes you want to leave, everyone in that school knows what he did, everyone knows he lost and anyone who disagrees is a loser like him." -Han

"I discovered a new galaxy when I met you, I love you so much." -Y/N

"- I always loved you my love, I always knew it was you, I was always crazy about you" -Han

"- crazy?"

"- yes, crazy, completely crazy" -Han

He grabs her waist and lifts her chin delicately with his finger and kisses her slowly, passionately

She thought: “Hanji, how hypnotizing you were.”

-" Thank you for not give up on me." -Han

[trappper-johnathan]

The MASH time loop but it's Don't Hug Me I'm Scared style in that all the characters are stuck in the loop but they take turns being aware of it ((the phrase "passing the consciousness around like a blunt" comes to mind))

Cause there are certain episodes where it seems like some of the characters have more clarity of the situation than others. An example off the top of my head is Trapper in Mail Call with his "it's continuous" comment. Now consider his actions in that episode vs in Dr. Pierce and Mr. Hyde where he says Hawkeye is turning into a fruitcake cause of his breakdown. If you look at it through my view, his different attitude is because he's not quite aware of the time loop in Dr. Pierce and Mr. Hyde. He also has another big moment of clarity in Cease-Fire, and is the only character in that episode who is aware of the time loop. He doesn't get his hopes up cause the war isn't ending. It will continue on and on and on and they're all gonna remain right where they are.

@thebreakfastgenie has an analysis on Henry Blake knowing he's doomed to die in Abyssinia, Henry, but I also think Radar knows. Obviously he's emotional about Henry leaving, which is why he cries when they salute each other, but that last part of the episode in the OR when he comes in to break the news, it struck me as a little odd. Yes, people show their grief in different ways, but his body language and the tone of his voice kinda stuck me as...disappointment? Or at least an emotion along the lines of disappointment, almost like he was kind of resigned to it. The way his body sags and the way he says it with a sort of bone-tired sadness rather than a fresh wound makes me feel like he knew it was going to happen. Because it's happened before. And maybe that time would have been different, but no. Henry never makes it home, no matter how many times they do this. And he just... He just wishes it didn't have to be that way but it is. And he's gotta be the one who tells the others.

I think it's safe to say that Hawkeye is the one who is conscious of the time loop most often (The Late Captain Pierce is a great Hawkeye Sees It episode), but sometimes it feels like even he doesn't see it. I would say that the episodes in which he's the most out of character are the ones where the veil is thickest.

That's sort of where the DHMIS thing comes in for me, where he (or any character, really) will say/do something that makes the viewer go, "Hang on, that's not quite right." Cause when that happens it almost feels like the character is being puppeted by someone/thing, and so of course they would do something they wouldn't normally do, because it's not actually them. Now that's getting kind of deep into the time loop thing, where it's not just a strange phenomenon occurring, but instead some outside Being manually controlling the story.

You could say that the writers are the ones who keep them trapped in the time loop. You could even say it's the viewers, too! When I watched GFA and I finished crying my eyes out after Hawkeye was flown away at the end, my immediate thought was "I should rewatch the show from the beginning" and my second thought was "If I start back at the beginning, I have continued the loop and Hawkeye never makes it out of Korea." Which made me cry a little more tbh, but it also kind of made me laugh. Here I am, rooting for this tortured man to get back home and get well, and then I'm going to start back at "Korea, 1950. A hundred years ago" and put them right back where they began to suffer over again.

ANYWAY, back to what I was originally saying: they're all stuck in the time loop, and they're all aware of it but at different times and to different degrees.

[believingispowerfulmagic]

A Hallmark Christmas

Summary: Regina struggles with her holiday spirit in the aftermath of Season 5 and finds comfort in the made-for-TV movies she used to mock. One night she makes a wish on a Christmas star for her own Hallmark Christmas movie happy ending and finds herself getting seven...or maybe more? [OQ AU]

Chapter 1: FFN | AO3 | Wattpad

Interlude #1

FFN | AO3 | Wattpad

Excerpt:

Regina woke up, once again in her bed. She sat up, wondering if this was another movie or something else. Pushing her blankets back, she padded over to the door and opened it. Looking down the hallway, she called out: "Hello?"

"Mom?" Henry called back from downstairs. "I'm in the kitchen."

She walked down the stairs, recognizing the house as her own. As she entered the kitchen, she found Henry eating some cereal. He smiled at her. "Good morning," he said.

"Good morning," she replied. "You're home early."

"No," he said, grinning. "You slept late."

Regina frowned, looking up at the clock. Surprise coursed through her as she realized it was after eleven AM - it was closer to lunch than breakfast. It had been years since she had slept so late and wondered how tired she had been the night before.

Henry tilted his head. "Are you okay, Mom? You still look tired."

"Oh," she said, though she wasn't sure if she should be surprised. Her rather detailed dream hadn't felt very restorative. So she just shrugged. "I guess I didn't sleep as well as I thought or hoped."

"You didn't fall asleep on the couch again, did you?" he asked, sounding concerned.

Embarrassed that he knew about that and was calling her out on it, she shook her head. "I fell asleep in bed."

He nodded. "Is it Roland?"

"What?" she asked, surprised.

"You seemed sad after the show," he said. "And I realized that the kindergarteners went last, which would've been Roland's class. So I was wondering if you had been thinking of him."

Regina sighed, nodding. It was the truth, after all. "I was. I miss him."

"I do too," Henry replied. He looked anguished as he asked: "Do you think if I hadn't tried to destroy magic, he would still be with us?"

She frowned, sitting next to him. "What do you mean?"

"Well, the main reason the Merry Men left when they did was because magic was so unstable and everyone who wanted to return to the Enchanted Forest wanted to go before they were stuck here forever," he said. "And when they left, you were on your way to stop me. Which makes me wonder that if you were here and the threat of magic going away wasn't there, would you have been able to convince the Merry Men to stay? Or at least to let you keep Roland?"

Regina had also wondered what would've happened if she had been in town or if the others hadn't been in such a rush to leave Storybrooke. And though it pained her, she knew that it likely would've ended up the same way - just that Regina could've said goodbye to Roland herself and accepted his gift rather than Zelena being the middleman.

She took Henry's hand. "Robin and I…well, we never discussed his wishes. There was never any time and maybe even after what happened in Camelot, I was too scared to have that conversation because it could make the chance of losing him become a reality."

"Okay," Henry said, sounding confused.

"So I don't know if Robin would've wanted Roland to stay with me," she said. "I had to defer to the Merry Men, who would've known Robin's wishes better. And they already raised Roland from a baby with him. They know him best."

Henry nodded, though he didn't look too convinced. "I guess."

"I believe we will see him one day," she said, though her heart constricted as she feared it was a fool's hope. "Our goodbye wasn't forever."

"I know," Henry replied, trying to smile. "I just miss him."

Regina walked closer and wrapped her arms around him, holding him close. "I know. I miss him too."

They hugged each other for a little while longer before she pulled back. "I'm going to change and then make myself some breakfast. When I'm done, we'll do whatever you want."

"Anything?" he asked, raising both eyebrows as he gave her a cheeky smile.

Realizing that she likely wouldn't like what he was thinking of, she added: "Within reason."

He chuckled, nodding. "Alright."

"Good," she said, kissing his cheek. "I'll be right back down."

[lottiepumpkinofficial]

day 29 (a day late)

chap’s 33,34,35

i am so fucking tired so we’ll see how much i read before i fall asleep

snowdrops symbolise hope, new beginnings and purity

i want a lesson on how to commit espionage

okay but what if raphael secretly is undercover but bc he’s so good at acting nobody knows

ooh who is whose plus one though? if jamie is ellie’s that looks suspicious but also jamie being ani’s plus one??? weird

i love that ani’s just been roped in and despite her efforts to just get on with life it’s somehow useful to the group

fucking hell that’s confusing

awww lottie doesn’t get to watch ellie being a prince :(( it’s so cute that she wants to do both

i hate that everyone teases her for it though, like sometimes things don’t click until they do

i like that binah uses a sweet themed metaphor to lighten the mood and relate it to tompkins, clever

lottieeeee since when do you not want to participate in extracurricular learning

thank god for binah, she is literally the only thing keeping these people together

okay i’m really getting into the details here which i shouldn’t bc i need sleep, but professor devine counts everyone, but uses jamie’s name- is this maybe her even in the tiniest way, allowing him to be a little more human than he lets himself be or idk im probably overthinking this

i love that professor devine is just like fuck henry the 8th i love that for her

baked bean man!!

i love that binah isn’t even slightly scared of jamie

hey, lottie, it’s not your job to slow down so someone can catch you up- you have got to move at your own pace and you can’t stop or force anyone to speed up their own journey

he will get lost though, oh and you will too

ollie, really? you thought surprising lottie, grabbing. her without giving her a chance to see you, knowing she has a TRAINED BIDYGUARD would be a good idea? this is like raph at new year’s eve

^ more proof olliel is slay

okay but if the princess of maradova is as famous as they’ve made her out to be, how do kate and charlie not already know? like at this point, even if they were still keeping it low down, there would definitely be at least a couple of photos of her circulating around

baby monkey, riding on a pig, baby monkey

lottie nooo it’s so sad she doesn’t talk about olloe

which tunnel? where were ellie and lottie?

foreshadow the hair cut

binahs spare glasses don’t make lottie not see so either lottie is just rawdogging bad eyesight or binah doesn’t actually need glasses and they’re all fake

IVE SAID IT BEFORE AND ILL SAY IT AGAIN LOTTOE IS SO DEMI GIRL AND SO WILLIAM TUFTY AND GENDER IS SO COOL AKD FUNKY

interesting that lottie picks up binahs aroaceism (a word?) bc of her lack of crushes- does this mean she is aware of jamie’s little crush on her bc otherwise he doesn’t show any interest in anyone

aww fam connections

ARTIST FORWSHAWO

LILIANA TUFTY PAINTING FORESHADOW I JEVER NOTICED TBID

pucky puck ollie

[mammonswhore]

Soo what if the MC was suicidal and depressed, so when the boys threaten then and stuff (like how lucifer was gonna kill them when protecting beel and luke) and they don't care or they ask them to do it no balls xD

I like this prompt bc they will be like fucking shocked if MC was not afraid of them. Anyways always remember to check on your mental health🖤♥

Brothers react to an MC who doesn't care about dying.

✒Lucifer

He was in complete shock. Every individual who he threatened was quick to apologize and surrender to his will but this human wasn't?

He dislikes that type of attitude but is also very curious about what happened to them to be this way.

When MC tried to climb up to the attic and he threatened them they just simply said "you know anything can kill me,right? You are not special for that one,Lucifer"

What the actual fuck is going on here?

He forced them to leave anyways but he was thinking about their response all night.

No one talked back to him besides Satan and Belphie and the first person out of his family talking back to him was human. A human! He was annoyed to say the least.

When the relationship between him and MC progressed he become more concerned about it.

He tried to get the truth out of them subtly and without acting suspicious or worried but when they finally said "Lucifer if you want to ask me something, do it. Don't try to get answers out of me that way,it won't work"

When they finally revealed that they were not worried about dead because it will get to them anyway,Lucifer was sad.

He was not only sad because he knew that MC was going to die but because they were not a little bit worried about it.

A sudden wave of sadness gets into Lucifer's chest and he proceeds to hug his lover and tells them that he will take them to therapy.

✒Mammon

He was very happy about MC not caring about dying at first since he couldn't care less and he never properly threatened them as well so they never got to talk back at him.

But once when they were escaping from two witches,MC got hurt and they didn't care at all. Like they literally didn't say shit about the wound on their leg and it took Mammon almost half an hour to realize that the blood he was smelling it was from their wound.

"MC WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING? ARE YOU DUMB? COME ONE,HUMAN! W-WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO? I'M GOING TO HELP YOU,FUCK!"

Very stressed out about it,starts yelling about how they need to be careful with their lives because they are weaker than the average and things like it.

"Mammon I don't care about death,I'm kinda craving for it at this point"

His face drops. A sudden feeling he couldn't recognize was placing on him. He was worried but it was not the type he was used to feel around them.

The single thought of MC dying send shivers down his back. He was borried and it was not because Lucifer would kill him but because he couldn't stand that thought.

"Don't go saying things like that,MC... I don't want you to die,human"

He hugs them kinda afraid they might order him to let them die right there.

He is going to look for help and tell Lucifer about it so they both can keep an eye on MC in case of anything.

✒Levi

His first thought when he heard MC saying they wanted to die was "honestly same."

When he was about to kill them on the TSL quizz thing they didn't even flinch. They were not about to run,hide or beg.

When Lucifer stepped in,Levi was fucking shocked but angry at the same time.

"Damn normie,who do they think they are?"

When both of them formed a pact he became more worried about their health,not because they were his master but also his only friend and he was not about to loose them for some stupid shit.

When they hurt doing some stupid shit with him Levi freaks out and has a mini meltdown but tries his best to control his emotions to help his Henry.

"Stupid normie... Can't you be more careful? Dumb,dumb,dumb human... Agh"

He is mad but he is more worried than he is mad so he is trying his best to ask them how are they so stupid without being rude.

He became more careful with his words since he thought that maybe a little push will send them over the edge and make them commit suicide.

Very sharp when others point out that he takes care of them,gets defensive easily and will lock both of them in his room for a while.

✒Satan

He can not properly understand what's going on with them. His first thought is that they are very much dumb.

Gets annoyed by that attitude easily but never looses a chance to asks them if they are really that dumb or if they want to get killed.

"Oh sorry Satan,did my attitude happen to bother you?"

Ugh. The mocking tone in their voice made him furrow his eyebrows and spit venomous words.

"Indeed it does but I can easily understand why are you so reckless,you are defenseless against me and you are still trying to argue with me. I must say you have some guts MC but I don't think it's late for a good reminder that I can kill you easily."

And then they smirked and stepped closer to him with a daring attitude.

"Do it,anything can kill me and I will die eventually so your meaningless threats don't scare me not even a bit."

He was waiting for them to run,to hide and scream for help. But Satan was not expecting that answer.

His demon form unleashed and he was ready to attack but something inside of his his head told him that he was not capable of killing them. And when he realized that he just patted their head and went to his room.

Later on when they made the pact and MC helped him when coming to terms with Lucifer,he was quite scared for their daring attitude.

Every time they went out even if it was with one of his brothers,Satan will check on them with messages or calls every time he could.

To be honest,MC doesn't need this type of checks on them but appreciates it since Satan knows better than anyone how hard it can be to control themselves.

He still gets very pissed off when MC makes snarky comments,dares him for anything or that type of things but he still won't attack them because he loves them way more.

✒Asmo

He is no the type to threaten someone unless they are threatening him first but he was very tired of MC's attitude through the day and he snapped.

"Can't you remember your place,MC? Every single person around can kill you and you still seem to be as sassy as ever."

He was about to apologize with them about his words since he was not the type to talk to them like that but he was surprised when they talked back (again).

"Asmo if you haven't notice I truly don't mind getting killed here,it would be more interesting that dying in the Human Realm to be honest and also everyone is going to die and no one is going to remember me so fuck it."

That was worst. His eyes were very lost trying to figure out where did those words came from? What was going on?

"MC don't day that,please" he whispered very nervous.

Asmo hugged them and calmed himself down. Even for a demon who has seen a lot of people die he was not ready to loose MC and he was also not ready to hear those words fall from their mouth.

"Asmo calm down,please."

"You were joking,right? You don't think that about your life,don't you?"

He might not seem like it but he was completely worried for their health and well being. Being MC the only person he ever considered as a friend and possible lover,he could not stand for what they were saying.

He became more careful with what he said to them and what the others were allowed to say,if someone tried to insult them or make them feel like less he will snap right away of that meant MC will get rid of those awful thoughts.

✒Beelzebub

He threatened them about eating his food but they were unfazed about him,it was the first time he threatened them after making the pact and honestly,his reaction was totally wrong and he knew this and he was ready to apologize but he was shut down by MC's words.

"Do it,I honestly don't care."

What? MC what the hell are you saying?

He calms down and says that they shouldn't say things like that around his brothers because they might explode and actually kill them. He was worried,yes but he was more worried about eating something because his stomach was growling like crazy.

"Why would you say something like that? If it wasn't because we demons can't kill our master you will be dead now,MC."

Beel was stuffing chips into his mouth while watching MC think about an answer, more worried than before.

"I didn't mean to scare you,Beel. But I will die anyways so it's just a matter of time and if someone dared to make it right now I wouldn't stop them."

He feels the chills going through his back, the feeling of loosing someone he loves again was a lot to process and the fact that MC was unfazed and really sure about their words made him feel full suddenly.

"I don't want to loose you,MC. I know that you are a human and all but can't you just take care of yourself a little? I don't want to loose you." *sad beel noises*

Reassuring him that they will try to find help, MC hugs Beel and promises to try to stop this type of comments.

He was still very very worried about them so he was always around keeping an eye and ear on them so no one killed them.

✒Belphie.

This was after the attic events,he was still very unsure about MC's presence on his life but he was hanging on there still getting used to them.

Until they were assigned to wake him up from a 10 hour nap to eat something.

"You dumb human,I will rip your head apart of you wake me up again."

"It's not like if you haven't tried already now wake up and eat something or Lucifer will be pissed."

He was very amused,they were not afraid of him anymore and decided to talk back to him. But he still was shocked to say the least.

The human who he killed once was now giving him orders without a pact or relationship that established that he had to obey them. They had some guts,that was for sure.

When their relationship progressed and he became closer to MC,he was not going to stand for that type of comments.

"MC you can't go around saying that you want to die! It hurts to see you this way, jeez!"

"I can't help it,Belphie. Sometimes my thoughts just slip through my lips without me even trying."

Now that was something he was not expecting to hear. What did they mean? They really wanted to die that bad?

"Listen here you little shit,I already lost you once and I'm not going to loose you again so stop making those stupid comments or I will tell Lucifer to pay you a good therapist... Fucking idiot."

Belphie was worried even if he seems like he was just annoyed by them,he was even mkre worried than what he will like to admit.

[babymetaldoll]

Stargazing (Spencer Reid/Reader)

Requested: No, but I needed some hardcore fluff

Summary: The team is “forced” to go camping, and Spencer finally decides to make “his move” on Reader.

Pairing: Spencer Reid/ Reader

Category: Hardcore fluff

Warnings: Zero

Word count: 3,2K

Masterlist

-

-

It was the first time the BAU didn't argue Strauss's decision. She had walked into the conference room and explained to the team that the FBI had decided each department had to do a workshop related to teamwork and trust.

- "You will spend this weekend camping together. You will be part of a Team-Building Training Workshop"- Strauss wasn't excited about the idea of her best team wasting a whole weekend. But she was glad her department didn't have to do the activity. She hated camping.

- "Are you telling me we have to spend our weekend in sleeping bags, singing kumbaya?"- Rossi raised an eyebrow and looked at Erin, and she didn't move a muscle- "I'm out."

- "David, I'm not asking you if you want to do it. The whole team has to be part of this activity, that includes you."

- "Come on, Rossi,"- Prentiss smiled and tried to cheer him up- "It will be a nice change from catching serial killers for a weekend.

- "Really, Emily?"- Rossi crossed his arms on his chest and looked at Reid- "Hey, kid. How many dead bodies are found each year in the woods in the country?"

- "Over 2.543 last year,"- Spencer answered. And didn't stop talking, of course- "We can not be sure they were all serial killer related cases. The most common ways to die in the woods are drowning, car accident, and suicide."

- "Suicide it is."- David whispered. He knew it was going to be a long weekend.

Even when he wasn't a person who loved camping and outdoor activities, Spencer was excited to spend the weekend with the team, especially with (Y/N). His teammate, best friend, and secret crush. Ok, it wasn't really a secret.

Of course, everybody knew about Spencer's feelings. He never successfully hid them from the team. You didn't need to be a profiler to notice each time (Y/N) walked into a room, Reid's eyes would follow her, and his cheeks blushed. When they sat together in the jet, Spencer would always be too self-aware of his own movements. He would try not to move, especially when she had fallen asleep, resting her head on his shoulder. And when they were working on a case together, he would always cover her on the field, and he would make sure she was safe, even when the unsub was already caught.

He loved her. Even a blind man could see. Except for (Y/N), of course. Because according to her own words: "There's no way Spencer Reid is in love with me. He would never look at me that way. He is perfect, and I'm a mess. He deserves the perfect genius girl."

-

- "Ok, Romeo, this weekend is the perfect opportunity for you to make your move"- Derek and Reid were alone in the SUV on their way to the retreat.

- "Sure. Because there's no better time to make a fool out of myself than in front of all my friends in the middle of nowhere."

- "What's with the attitude, pretty Ricky? Relax"- Morgan frowned and put on some music, singing along for a moment. Reid looked at him and raised an eyebrow, trying not to laugh.

- "Ok man, picture this: you, your pretty lady, in the middle of the night, gazing at the stars together, alone in the middle of the forest. The full moon is the only light."

- "Who are you? since when are you a romance expert?"

- "Hey! I can be romantic!"

- "I've seen you get girls only by raising an eyebrow"- Reid argued, and he was right. It had happened once, but that was another completely different story.

- "What I'm trying to tell you is that you have the perfect chance to tell her how you feel during this trip"- Spencer was about to start debating that idea when Derek continued.

- "And stop saying she has no feeling for you!"

Reid bit his tongue and looked at the road. Neither of them said a word for the next couple of minutes. Until Spencer whispered

- "But she doesn't"

- "She does!!"- Derek nearly yelled

- "Why are you so sure?!"

- "Because she told Penelope she is in love with you!!"

The silence in the car was as intense as the red in Spencer's cheeks. Derek knew he shouldn't have said that, but he was tired of seeing his best friend's sad eyes each time he stared at (Y/N). Someone had to do something, and he knew neither of them would make the first move.

- "Are you sure?"- Reid's mouth was hanging open- "I mean, maybe she was joking."

- "No, she was honest. So please, this weekend, make your freaking move."

-

How could Spencer ever make his move? He had no idea. He didn't even have a "move"! But something inside of him felt a little more confident now.

That didn't show on the outside at all, 'cos during the whole day, he was more clumsy than ever. He dropped his coffee. He failed the first two attempts to set up his tent and nearly fell carrying logs for the fire.

He wanted to dig a hole and hid.

But (Y/N) didn't notice any of that. Not because she didn't pay attention, but because she was oblivious to any of those things. She just couldn't stop staring: He was wearing jeans. Spencer Walter Reid was wearing jeans and a t-shirt. (Y/N) thought she was going to have a heart attack when he got out of the car.

Sure, yes, she had seen him outside work in a more casual outfit, but nothing prepared her for Spencer's camping clothing. It suited him too well for his own good.

- "Hello? Anybody there?"- Prentiss waved at (Y/N). She and JJ stood in front of her, trying to catch her attention.

- "Jesus! you look like a schoolgirl today!"- JJ teased her, laughing- "Can you be more obvious?"

- "What are you talking about?"- (Y/N) tried to look all innocent and continued setting the logs for the campfire.

- "If Spencer wasn't so clueless about your feelings, I swear you two would be already married,"- Emily joked and helped (Y/N) with the logs. The young SSA just shook her head and tried to keep her eyes from Reid for as long as she could. She successfully did it for five minutes. That day's record.

- "(Y/N), hey"- he stood by her side, and she quickly stood up.

- "Hey, how are you doing?"

- "Good... you?"- she just nodded and smiled. She really was acting like a schoolgirl in front of Spencer- "Great... hey, I thought maybe tonight you would like to do some stargazing with me..."- Emily and JJ heard him and nearly squealed. They tried to look away, but it was impossible. They needed to know what was happening. Where was García? she was going to be so mad she missed that.

- "Yeah! I'm sure tonight we can see way more stars than on your building's roof like last time."

(Y/N) answered, smiling, thinking there was nothing more romantic than being underneath a starry sky, listening to Spencer talking about constellations.

- "Ok, kids,"- Rossi's voice stepping out of his huge camper interrupted them and forced everybody to turn around- "Let's do this trust thing we are forced to do before it's lunchtime. Maybe we can manage to go home early."

-

Of course, they weren't. The whole team had to work as a unit to fulfill a series of activities an expert team the FBI had hired forced them to do. Aaron thought it was unnecessary, considering they worked on the field together, and they trusted each other with their lives all the time. But he was also sure his team needed a break, and everybody could use some fresh air.

- "Great work, team"- Hotch hugged everybody and smiled when the whole activity was done- "I think we've earned a nice dinner."

- "Please don't tell me we have to hunt our food"- Penelope wide opened her eyes suddenly and looked at Hotch- "I can eat blueberries."

- "Don't worry, kids"- Rossi shook his head and pointed to his camper- "Anyone in the mood for a nice steak?"

- "I bought marshmallows for the campfire later,"- (Y/N) said and smiled- "You are never too old for some s'more."

- "Scary stories by the fire eating s'mores? I'm ten years old again"- JJ looked excited- "I need to do this with Henry."

- "Just don't tell him your "I'm scared of the woods because I found the camp director dead" story." - Derek said, smiling.

- "You freaked out!"- JJ chuckled, remembering how she had scared her friends a few years earlier while working on a case in the woods.

- "I need to hear that story!"- Emily said- "I bet it's no better than mine, I'm sure."

- "Battle of horror stories?"- (Y/N) smiled evilly- "You two have nothing on me."

-

The evening was fun and a little terrifying. Garcia was holding Derek's arm so tight it was starting to feel numb. Rossi and Hotch had told a couple of stories that left the team completely frightened, to be fair. Especially Spencer. He had forgotten an essential part of his plan: nights in the woods are dark as pitch. And he was afraid of the dark. How would he successfully take (Y/N) to a nice spot, sit down and stare at the stars with her if he was too scared to move from the fire?

(Y/N) looked at Reid and sighed. Maybe he had regretted it. Of course, he hasn't forgotten his invitation, 'cos Spencer remembered everything. Still, he hadn't made any move or sign to go stargazing. Being alone with him in the dark was scary but in the right way. Maybe she could finally tell him how she felt. No, no way. That wasn't going to happen.

- "Ok, so... it's late, and we are out of wine"- Rossi stood up and looked at the team- "I am ready to go to my comfy bed"- the rest of the team groaned. They were going to spend the night in a tent, probably freezing, while Rossi was going to be in his warm camper.

- "I'm going to sleep too, we have trekking in the morning, and it's going to be a long walk. I suggest you all go to bed early."- Hotch stood up and waved at the team, to then walk to his tent."

- "Sweet chocolate thunder, is there room in your tent for me?"- Penelope asked, and he chuckled immediately

- "Are you still scared of the stories? they are just made up things people create to terrify us."

- "I know. But I'm also scared of bears, psycho killers, and slender man"- Morgan looked at her, raising an eyebrow. She wasn't joking.

- "Bring your sleeping bag."

- "You are my hero. I love you."

Prentiss and JJ went to bed soon after, leaving the two love birds alone.

- "Stargazing?"- Reid whispered, and (Y/N) nodded- "We should find a darker stop... or we can stay here by the fire if you like."

- "Are we going to get a nice view here?"- (Y/N) looked at the stars and tried to see anything.

- "No, it has to be darker,"- Spencer whispered, taking a look around- "There was a nice spot by the cliff, that way."

- "I don't think walking to a cliff in the middle of the night is a good idea"- (Y/N) smiled, and Reid shook his head

- "You are right..."

- "But we can walk carefully and carry a flashlight,"- she added and smiled, looking at him. His brown curls moved with the wind, and his chocolate eyes were brighter than the sparks of fire next to them.

- "That sounds good."

Spencer stood still for a second. He had a blanket in one hand and a bag of marshmallows in the other. (Y/N) put on her scarf and jacket and stared at him.

- "Are you ok?"

- "Yeah."

He wasn't. He was trying to calm himself down, thinking that walking in the middle of the dark was worthy because it meant spending time alone with (Y/N).

He kept telling himself he didn't have to worry because nothing was going to happen. He wished he had his gun with him in case of any danger, though. Maybe that could make him feel better.

- "You can't kill darkness, stupid"- he whispered to himself and sighed. (Y/N) walked a step closer and took the marshmallow bag. Then, she held his hand.

- "Let's go?"

That was all Spencer needed. He was ready.

- "Did you know astronomy is the oldest of the sciences?- Reid whispered as they walked hand in hand to a nice clear spot - "Ancient astronomers were able to differentiate between stars and planets, as stars remain relatively fixed over the centuries while planets will move an appreciable amount during a comparatively short time."

- "And when did you start learning about the stars?"- Spencer loved that. How each time he started rambling, she wouldn't get annoyed like the rest of the people he knew. Instead, she would always ask him something related to the subject. And it was usually something personal. She wanted to learn more about him and how he had ended up being such an amazing human being.

- "When I was four, mom started taking me regularly to the library. That was when I started to learn more about science. I could pick ten books each time we were there, and I decided I wanted to know everything I could about everything I loved."

Spencer confessed and smiled, looking at her. His heart was warm with their conversations. He was never comfortable talking about his personal life, especially about his childhood. But with (Y/N), it all came naturally.

- "How often did she take you?"

- "Every other day"- she chuckled and remembered the pictures Diana had shown her of Spencer when he was a little kid last time they visited her. He was adorable, with his glasses and his messy hair. It was impossible not to imagine having a family with him.

- "This is it... this is a good spot."- Spencer said and stopped walking. He moved a log and tapped on it, smiling at (Y/N). She sat with him, and he wrapped them together with the blanket.

- "So, what am I staring at?"- (Y/N) asked and kept her eyes on the starry sky. It seemed she had never seen so many stars. And they even looked closer. Spencer looked at her, and his heart skipped a beat. He was about to start a lecture on astronomy, but instead, he decided to do "his move." Or the move he could think of. He didn't really know if it was a move, but he was going to give it a shot anyway.

- "Most stargazers learn about constellations looking for different noticeable patterns across the sky"- he made a pause clearing his throat. That was it. He was going to do it.

- "That's how it all started,"- he continued- "Some of these noticeable patterns up there are still the same ones our ancestors noticed while sitting around a campfire telling stories like we did today."

- "Telling stories about the stars sounds a lot less creepy, though" - (Y/N) whispered, and the two of them smiled- "Wanna tell me a story about these stars?"

There was no way Spencer could say not to her puppy eyes.

- "Ok... let's see..."- Reid sighed and thought for a moment, looking at the constellations above them- "Do you see those stars over there that look like a cute bunny?"

- "Which ones?"- Spencer pointed at the sky, and (Y/N) nodded- "I see them"

- "Well, you'll see, there was a comet in love with the bunny, but it could only look at her from a safe distance."- Spencer finally confessed. (Y/N) held her breath for a second and tried not to get her hopes high.

- "Why?"

- "Well, the comet was afraid he wasn't good enough for the bunny"- Spencer was whispering, and his soft voice sent shivers to (Y/N)'s body- "So he stared at his favorite constellation every day and only imagined what it would feel like to hold her in his arms."

- "And the bunny never saw the comet?"- (Y/N) asked softly, while very, very slowly, she moved her hand and reached Spencer's.

- "The bunny thought the comet just wanted to be her friend because he was scared to tell her how he felt,"

(Y/N) kept thinking there was no way on earth Spencer was telling her how he felt about her with that adorable story. Was he? Really? 'cos it was too romantic, and if he wasn't and she was wrong... it would be heartbreaking. But, there was only one way to find out.

- "I think the bunny felt the same, but she thought she wasn't good enough for the comet"- Spencer's heart raced at those words, and he turned to look at (Y/N). She blushed and stared at him with a shy smile.

- "Why would the bunny ever think that?"

- "The comet is too brilliant and too amazing to settle for a simple constellation when he could have the sun."

(Y/N) was embarrassed to confess those feelings, but it was now or never.

- "But the bunny is the sun in the comet's life."- Spencer whispered and caressed her cheek with his thumb carefully.

- "Really?"- her voice was so soft, it melted Spencer completely. He couldn't answer. All he could do was to lean in slowly and kissed her as gently as he could, enjoying the sensation of her lips against his. He cupped her face with both hands and moved a little closer.

It was the sweetest kiss he had ever given. It wasn't just because (Y/N)'s lips tasted like marshmallow, but because it was filled with pure love. He could feel it, even when he still couldn't believe it. She loved him. She really did.

(Y/N) was sure that wasn't really happening. She had probably fallen down the cliff earlier and was now unconscious or dead, living a fantasy. There was no way Spencer Reid was kissing her.

When they slowly moved and looked at each other, neither of them knew what to say. So (Y/N) did what she always dreamed of doing and leaned in and kissed him again. Spencer didn't hesitate and wrapped his arms around her waist, moving her closer to him. Her hands played shyly with some of the curls of his hair, and they simply kissed for what seemed to be forever, even when it wasn't enough time for them. Spencer felt he could kiss her his whole life, and he still wouldn't get enough of her.

- "So..."- (Y/N) whispered after some minutes and looked at Spencer, blushing- "Do you think the comet and the bunny could... maybe try to be more than friends?"

He smiled and kissed her again, rubbing her lips carefully with his; (Y/N) sighed into the kiss.

- "The comet is willing to do anything the bunny asks him because he just wants to make her happy all day, every day."

(Y/N) couldn't speak. She could only kiss him again and again.

- "Bunny just wants her comet to be happy too."

- "Then would Bunny be the comet's girlfriend?"- she giggled and nodded- "Good, because I don't think I could ever live without your kisses ever again, Bunny."

- "Neither do I, Comet"

And after that, stargazing was forgotten. There were enough stars in their kisses to keep the two of them lost in their own new universe. 

[the-record]

Headaches and Hospitals

A/N: I love JJ idk why so many people crap on her. And we need more JJ content pleasee

Summary: Who would’ve thought that passing out would lead you to the best decisions you have ever made?

CW: Marriage, pregnancy, hospitals, little mentions of the case. Nothing to serious just lots of fluff.

You felt like crap. Like you just wanted to get back in bed and not get up but you had tons of paperwork to do. You got ready like usual and tried to hide how sick you felt. 

“Morning kid.”

“Hey Morgan.” You sat in your chair and rubbed your temples, trying to get rid of you stubborn headache. You pulled out a bottle of ibuprofen and took some with some of your water.

“Hey, babe are you ok?” You looked up to your girlfriend standing next to you.

“It’s just a headache Jayje.” You smiled and kissed the top of your head. “I’m going to go make coffee do you want a cup?” She nodded.

“That would be nice, thank you. Just bring it to my office-nope conference room, we have a case.” You stood up to go get her coffee and felt dizzy. You closed your eyes and held onto your desk to keep steady. “Woah, you ok?”

“Yeah I’m fine. Go get ready I will bring you some coffee.” She did so but was very hesitant about it. You brought her the coffee and sat down in your usual spot.

“Thank you. Cincinnati Ohio, 3 women found in their houses. Women were all choked to death.”

“How do you know they were choked?” Derek questioned. JJ clicked the remote and pictures of the women being choked. You looked away and down at your file. You looked at dead bodies all the time but for some reason, this just made your stomach churn.

“Has Garcia been able to track the pictures and where they came from?” You asked.

“No. They were printed. Someone scanned them to show us.” You nodded.

“No visible tattoos. No marks to define him at all. Wearing gloves so he left no DNA, this guy really thought of everything.”

“This has to be premeditated. He somehow gets into the house without breaking in or scaring them, and then corners them maybe?” Emily pointed out.

“Which is exactly why we have to leave soon. The time is getting shorter between each murder. Wheels up in 30.” 

“All of the women look similar to each other. All of them have blonde hair, similar heights, and they are all wearing almost identical dresses. Garcia do any of the victims have a partner?” She clicked her mouse a couple of times.

“Yes. From what it looks Abby was just proposed to, Cheyenne had a long term boyfriend, and Kayla was about to get married.” She sounded so disappointed as he talked.

“So if his long term partner left him, then he was angry. Whoever she is, she was the trigger.” You added. 

“Ok, JJ I want you and Y/N to talk to victims families and partners. Emily, Reid and Derek go to the latest crime scene. Me and Rossi will go down to the M.E.’s office.” You moved back to where you and JJ sat before. Your headache slowly was getting worse but you had to ignore it. You had a job to do.

“Y/N, are you ok?” You looked at your girlfriend.

“Baby, I promise I’m fine. I probably just need something to eat. As soon as we land I will grab something ok?” 

“Fine, but I don’t want you stressing yourself out to much. You look tired, like you haven’t been sleeping.” She moved into the chair next to yours. “Get some rest, it’s a short ride but a nice nap might help.” You smiled at her. She was always concerned for your well being and never left you alone if she thought something was wrong. She was stubborn but a good person. You rest your head on her shoulder and cuddle up on the chair. She lays her head on yours as you drift to sleep. She was right, you did need some sleep, but the nap was no help. You still had a headache and got dizzy once more while walking in to the cars. She drove both of you to the police department where you met with the families. You started with the latest victim, Kayla’s fiancé Matt.

“Hi Matt. I’m Jennifer Jareau and this is Agent Y/N Y/L/N. We have a couple of questions for you if that’s ok.” He nodded and you sat down next to him.

You spent the next 20 minutes talking to Matt about his fiancée. You felt an overwhelming amount of sadness hearing how he talked about her. She was a insanely good person who took every precaution. After you had finished your questions your thanked him and moved on to the next family. Each of them brought your moods down even more. JJ had been helping you with the questions because she was still new to profiling. You had helped her study and get ready for everything when she was becoming one and it made you so proud. When she came back to the BAU you were so happy because this meant she wouldn’t have to leave for her job anymore. 

By the time you had finished your headache was 5 times worse than it was this morning. You closed your eyes and held your head in your hands.

“Not getting any better?” You shook your head. “Why don’t I take you to the hotel?”

“No that’s fine. We have a lot of work to do.”

You spent the rest of your day trying to make up a geological profile with Reid and JJ. Nothing was happening and everything just sucked.

After 6 days of work and 2 more victims, you got a call from someone saying a man broke into her house. You all geared up because he changed is M.O. on the last victim and used a gun. You drove with the Derek and Emily to the house. You 3 went in the front and Hotch, Rossi, and Reid went through the back. Everything was going well until you were about to catch the Unsub. You started to feel dizzy, your vision was fading and suddenly you were falling. Luckily Reid was behind you and noticed you shifting before you fell. 

“I swear I am going to murder that girl. I kept telling her to rest and relax for a second but she wouldn’t listen. God she is so stubborn.” You woke up in a hospital from hearing your girlfriends voice.

“Mmm, I learn from the best.” You reached for your girlfriends hand. 

“You’re so lucky I love you Y/L/N.”

“I am pretty lucky huh. Come here.” You moved over in the hospital bed and set a place for her to lay down. “Lay down. Don’t be stubborn come here.” She smirked slightly and laid down. She put her arm around you as you rest your head on her chest. She ran her fingers through your hair. “I love you Jennifer Jareau.” You whispered.

“I love you too Y/N Y/L/N.” She kissed the top of your head and you held her hand.

“We should get married.” You looked up at her and smiled. “Right? Jennifer Jareau, I love you so much. I don’t have a ring or anything but, will you marry me?” She pulled you in for a kiss. “I’m taking that as a yes?”

“You bet your ass that’s a yes. On one condition.” You nodded. “You stop fainting in front of unsubs.” You smiled and pulled her in for a sweet kiss. You sat there for a second before she pulled away. 

“Sounds like a deal. The moment we land, I am taking you and we are going ring shopping.” She smiled. 

“I think that’s a great plan.”

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Your legs felt like jello as you stood at the alter, waiting for JJ to walk down. When you did see her, she was absolutely gorgeous. You wore the jumpsuit the both of you picked out and she wore dress. You couldn’t help but stare at her beauty as she walked down the aisle. “God you’re gorgeous.” You saw her blush at your compliment. She took your hands and Emily started officiating. You weren’t really listening much though, you were too focused on the woman in front of you.

“Jennifer Jareau. When I first met you, all I thought about was how kind and beautiful you were. I knew that you had to be my person. I had to at least be friends with that girl. And luckily I got just that. I’ll be honest, when you met Will I was kind of disappointed. I thought, I wont ever get her, I was too late. But I couldn’t be happier that you met him because now you have Henry. I love that kid so much, he brings so much joy in to everyone’s life. And, Will sorry, when you and Will broke up, I was elated. I knew that I had to take my chance. So I gave you some time to cope with everything before deciding it was now or never. When you said yes to that date, I thought I would cry. When I stayed over the first time, I thought it would be weird with Henry. I thought he wouldn’t want me to stay over. Luckily that kid takes after you. He is kind, and smart, and has terrible eating habits. When he cuddled up to me for the first time I did cry. I cried because your baby trusted me and that’s the most important thing to me. I promise to take care of him everyday and to love him wholeheartedly. Loving you means loving him and I am nothing but prepared to shower him with love and respect. I love you so much Jayje.” You saw a tear roll down her cheek as Henry came up to you. You held him on your hip, both of you placing a kiss on his head before JJ started her vows. Her promise to you.

“Y/N Y/L/N. If you could hear the phone call of me telling Emily you had asked me on a date, it would consist of us both screaming into the phone. The night we went out together I fell in love. I didn’t realize what I had been missing my entire life. I was hesitant to ask you to say over that night because I was worried about how Henry would react, but you were so good to him. You always have been. And whenever I saw you with Henry my heart grew and so did my love for you. You have been nothing but good to me and him and I couldn’t ask for a better person to help me parent my child. You however are so stubborn. Like the most stubborn person I have ever met. You wouldn’t go back to the hotel for one day. You wouldn’t relax for one day and I guess I can’t be mad because if you had, if you had started to feel better that day, we wouldn’t be here in this moment. We aren’t the most typical couple but I couldn’t ask for someone better. Thank you for everything you have done for me and Henry. We both love you some much.” 

“By the power of your love and commitment, and the power vested in me, I now pronounce you wives! You may now kiss the bride.” You didn’t hesitate for a second as she pulled you into a kiss.

You smiled at your new wife sitting in front of you, taking in her beauty when you heard Emily tapping her glass. “If I could have everyone’s attention. Hi, I’m Emily. I met these women around 6 years ago and if I could take back everything and change it, I wouldn’t. When I joined the BAU I met these two women who were extremely clingy and affectionate but only towards each other. When I heard that Y/N had proposed I cried. Like I cried and I think Garcia has proof. The kindest women I had ever met have fallen in love and I was lucky enough to witness it. I was gone for some time and protected by them. They both risked all of their friendships to keep me safe, even if it meant putting themselves in danger. Everyday they save people without fail. If you haven’t met him already, next to JJ, is her son Henry. He wrote something for me to read, so here goes. ‘Dear Y/N. Thank you for making my mama happy. Before she was sad and it made me sad. You made her happy and made me happy.’” You felt the tears start to form in your eyes and called Henry to come sit in your lap. You held him close as Emily continued to read. “‘Thank your for being so nice to me and making me cakes all the time. They are really good. I love you mom.’” When you heard the last thing, the tears started to flow. You held the little boy even closer, whispering ‘I love you too’ in his ear. It was the first time he ever called you his mom. “I think that just perfects the night. I would continue but I cannot top that. Congratulations ladies. We all love you so much.” She raised her glass. “To Y/N and JJ. May they have their happily ever after.” You raised your glasses and clinked them while setting in a sweet kiss. 

“Ew!” You laughed and pulled away at Henry’s comment.

“Ok little man.” You grabbed her hand. “May I have this dance?” JJ held your hand and you led her to the dance floor, your arms around her waist and hers around your neck. Her head laid on your chest, underneath your chin, as the both of you swayed. “Thank you.”

She looked at you. “For what?” A smiled grew on your face.

“Everything. Loving me. Trusting me with Henry. Taking care of me. Letting me take care of you. I love you Mrs. Jareau.”

“I love you too Mrs. Jareau.” Everything else was a blur. Everything but her.

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“Can we talk?” You sat her down on the couch.

“Y/N are you ok?” You could see the concern on her face.

“I’m fine. I wanted to ask you something.” She nodded to give you permission to ask the question. “Jayje, I wanna have a baby.” Her face lit up.

“Really?” You nodded and she pulled you into a hug. “Of course.” 

That week the both of you did a crazy amount of research. You found a good doctor and made an appointment. A couple months later you were pregnant. You were both ecstatic. 

“JJ. We are going to have a baby.” 

You had both decided that you wanted to wait to tell the team in case something happened. However it became very hard to do this because your emotions were everywhere. The extra hormones you had to take were wearing off a little at this point but now the hormones you produced during pregnancy were taking over. Your temper was short and you cried all the time. You had morning sickness as well so you were constantly sick. The team thought something was up but didn’t ask what was happening. At 4 months you decided to tell the team because you were starting to show and eventually you wouldn’t be able to hide it. You decided to tell them right before a case.

“Wheels up in 30.”

“Um, before any of your guys go, me and JJ have something to tell you.” Everyone waited around but they looked nervous.

“You guys are still together right? And neither of you are leaving, right?” You smiled at shook your head at Penelope.

“No, well kind of but no we aren’t leaving and yes, we are still together.” You looked at JJ before pulling out a small box and handing it to Hotch. “Will you open this?” He nodded and took the box from you without question. JJ held your hand. He let out a small gasp and smiled.

“What? Hotch, what is it?” Derek questioned. He took the ultrasounds out and placed them on the table. There was an audible gasp before the team looked at you. Penelope was the first to run over. 

“Congratulations you two! Wait, who is pregnant?” You looked at your wife and raised you hand slightly. 

“Congrats mamas.” Derek came over and hugged the both of you. Then Rossi, Blake, Hotch, and finally Spencer. 

“If either of you need anything, just tell me.” You smiled and held your arms out for a hug. He accepted and you felt calm again. You had grown close with Spencer over the years. He was one of your best friends and you couldn’t be more thankful for that. You pulled away but still held his arms in your hands.

“Thank you Spence. Really.” He smiled and congratulated JJ before walking out with the team. You stood behind with JJ. “So what do you say baby? Should we go kick some ass?”

“I don’t think you’ll be doing much ass kicking.” You scoffed at her comment.

“And what is that supposed to mean?” She kissed you softly and whispered her next words on your lips.

“You struggled to put your shoes on this morning.” You stood there stunned as she pulled away and began to go get ready. 

“I cannot believe you!” She smirks as she walks away.

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You decided to stop going out on the field at 6 months. Babies sometimes come early, why risk that. Why risk getting hurt on the field. You had everything figured out. You were 8 months getting slowly closer to 9. You would stay and help Garcia during everything. JJ was going to be there during the birth no matter where she was and everything was going to be perfect. 

You knocked on Garcia’s office door. “Good morning lovely lady. How is the case going?” You weren’t feeling well that morning so you decided to rest a little after the sitter took Henry to school.

“Good so far I think. You doing ok?” You smiled and nodded.

“Yes. Ready to not be pregnant anymore but I’m ok.” Little did you know, your wish shall soon be granted. “How’s JJ? I was going to call her this morning but didn’t want to interrupt anything.”

“She’s good. She told me to tell you that she loves you. She really does you know. Like, I have never seen anyone love somebody so much.” You smiled.

“I love her too. Well I am with you today.” You pulled the chair you guys had put in her office when you first started staying back from cases. Her office was nice. Busy, but relaxing. 

You spent the day with her, and the team at times, trying to figure things out. Henry came for a visit after school as the babysitter had a class she couldn’t miss. He sat in the ‘Batcave’ with you and Garcia playing with some toys she had. The day was long and nothing happened for awhile. Nothing happened until your baby decided to make their big entrance. 

You had felt some contractions throughout the day just assuming they were Braxton hicks. You were good about hiding them too, but still Garcia noticed.

“Y/N, are you ok honey?” You smiled at her and nodded.

“Just a contraction. I’m okay.” Her jaw dropped.

“No ma’am. We are getting you to the hospital. Hey Henry? Can you pack up your ruck sack for me? We need to get Y/N somewhere, I think you might get to meet your little sibling today!” Henry instantly smiled and was frantically picking up. He walked next to you as Garcia took you downstairs. You called JJ as soon as you go into the car. 

“Hey baby, you ok?” JJ questioned.

“No. I’m not. JJ you need to get on the jet and get down here now.” You yelled. The pain was starting to kick your ass.

“What? Y/N, what’s happening?” Garcia took the phone and put it on speaker. 

“Hi JJ, you’re on speaker with Henry in the car. I am driving Y/N to the hospital, she was starting to have contractions and on our way out her water broke.” You heard JJ audibly gasp before hearing her yell at Hotch. She was screaming at him to get her on the jet which calmed you down surprisingly.

She stayed on the phone with you the entire time you drove to the hospital but you hung up when you got there. They got you into a room where you sat with Garcia and Henry until Will came to pick him up. Your labor was long, thankfully, so JJ was there for the birth of your daughter. The first time you held her, neither of you could take you eyes off of her.

“Do you have any name ideas?” JJ asked. You looked up and smiled for a moment before turning back to your daughter.

“I was thinking Rosaline.” You thought back to your wedding night. To your bestfriends speech before she left to go to London.

“Rosaline Emily Jareau.” You smiled and nodded.

“Hi Rosaline. We’re your moms.” 

The introductions of your daughter was sweet. Hotch was asked to be her godfather and Emily her godmother. Garcia spoiled her rotten with gifts. Spencer eventually taught her new fun things. Derek taught her how to play softball and JJ taught her soccer. Rossi also spoiled her with love and gifts. When Emily got back she tried to teach her how to weald a gun, that however didn’t last long. Even as the team spilt apart, they all were there for her. You couldn’t ask for a better family.

[books-letstalkaboutem]

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue Quotes that I Loved

This is just a list of quotes or excerpts that I highlighted while reading the book- literally all of them and there are a lot. I’m going to go ahead and say spoilers below just because there are so many quotes and while I don’t think the quotes actually spoil anything, I don’t want to accidentally spoil something for someone.

Some of the quotes might seem a little weird out of context but these are quotes that hit close to home, made me say “Hell, yeah, Addie!!!", quotes that made me laugh, and then basically all of the other quotes that I loved while reading.

I know that I didn't completely fall in love with this book like so many other people did, but it was still so beautifully written and there were so many amazing quotes in this book.

And just a heads up, I read this on my kindle, just in case the page numbers I list don’t match with your copy of the book.

Spoilers Below:

Quotes that Hit Close to Home

“Three and twenty, a third of a life already buried.” Page 39

“The day passes like a sentence. The sun falls like a scythe.” Page 41

“[...] and when she dies it will be as though she never lived.” Page 42

“I am so tired of not having choices, so scared of the years rushing past beneath my feet. I do not want to die as I’ve lived, which is no life at all. I—” Page 46

“[...] she swears sometimes her memory runs forward as well as back, unspooling to show the roads she’ll never get to travel. But that way lies madness, and she has learned not to follow.” Page 61

“His parents meant well, of course, but they always told him things like Cheer up, or It will get better, or worse, It’s not that bad, which is easy to say when you’ve never had a day of rain.” Page 97

“But then a night would go long, and a day would start late, and now he feels like there’s no time at all. Like he is always late for something.” Page 119

““I see someone who cares,” she says slowly. “Perhaps too much. Who feels too much. I see someone lost, and hungry. The kind of person who feels like they’re wasting away in a world full of food, because they can’t decide what they want.”” Page 140

““Life is so brief, and every night in Rennes I’d go to bed, and lie awake, and think, there is another day behind me, and who knows how few ahead.”” Page 167

““I mean feeling like it’s surging by so fast, and you try to reach out and grab it, you try to hold on, but it just keeps rushing away. And every second, there’s a little less time, and a little less air, and sometimes when I’m sitting still, I start to think about it, and when I think about it, I can’t breathe. I have to get up. I have to move.”” Page 177

““Small places make for small lives. And some people are fine with that. They like knowing where to put their feet. But if you only walk in other people’s steps, you cannot make your own way. You cannot leave a mark.”” Page 179

“It was such a lovely jar she had kept them in. But the glass is cracking now. The water leaking through.” Page 215

“Moments of joy register as brief, but ecstatic. Moments of pain stretch long and unbearably loud.” Page 225

“[...] you’ve never felt called to any one thing. There is no violent push in one direction, but a softer nudge a hundred different ways, and now all of them feel out of reach. Page 226

“[...] in wanting to live, to learn, to find yourself, you’ve gotten lost.” Page 226

“He lets it ring, holds his breath until it stops. He tells himself that if they call again, he’ll answer. If they call again, he’ll tell them he is not okay. But the phone doesn’t ring a second time.” Page 229

“He misses the structure, misses the path, misses the purpose. And maybe it wasn’t a perfect fit, but nothing is.” Page 257

“That he’d blinked and somehow years had gone by, and everyone else had carved their trenches, paved their paths, and he was still standing in a field, uncertain where to dig.” Page 283

“And those first two years, he was happy. He had Bea, and Robbie, and all he had to do was learn. Build a foundation. It was the house, the one that he was supposed to build on top of that smooth surface, that was the problem. It was just so … permanent.” 283

“Choosing a class became choosing a discipline, and choosing a discipline became choosing a career, and choosing a career became choosing a life, and how was anyone supposed to do that, when you only had one?” Page 283

““The vexing thing about time,” he says, “is that it’s never enough. Perhaps a decade too short, perhaps a moment. But a life always ends too soon.”” Page 333

“He is all restless energy, and urgent need, and there isn’t enough time, and he knows of course that there will never be. That time always ends a second before you’re ready. That life is the minutes you want minus one.” Page 421

“The world is wide, and he’s seen so little of it with his own eyes. He wants to travel, to take photos, listen to other people’s stories, maybe make some of his own. After all, life seems very long sometimes, but he knows it will go so fast, and he doesn’t want to miss a moment.” Page 438

Quotes that Made Me Laugh

“Henry loves his sister, he does. But Muriel’s always been like strong perfume. Better in small doses. And at a distance.” Page 120

““Sorry, Book,” she mutters, lifting the cat gingerly onto the back of the old chair, where he does his best impression of an inconvenienced bread loaf.” Page 248

““It’s Halloween!” defends Robbie. “It’s the twenty-third,” says Henry, but Robbie treats holidays the way he treats birthdays, stretching them from days into weeks, and sometimes into seasons.” Page 274

Quotes that made me say “Hell, yeah, Addie!!!”

“If she must grow roots, she would rather be left to flourish wild instead of pruned, would rather stand alone, allowed to grow beneath the open sky. Better that than firewood, cut down just to burn in someone else’s hearth.” Page 31

“[...]from this moment forward, her life will be her own.” Page 48

“There is a defiance in being a dreamer.” Page 117

““It has only been two years,” she says. “Think of all the time I have, and all the things I’ll see.”” Page 132

“It will take time, but time is the one thing Addie has plenty of. So she opens her eyes, and starts again.” Page 192

“But then Addie straightens, lifts her chin, smiles with an almost defiant kind of joy. “But isn’t it wonderful,” she says, “to be an idea?”” Page 261

Quotes that I Love

“[...] never pray to the gods that answer after dark.” Page 7

“What is a person, if not the marks they leave behind?” Page 15

“The things that last, even when memories don’t.” Page 16

“As if you couldn’t like one place and want to see another.” Page 23

“Books, she has found, are a way to live a thousand lives—or to find strength in a very long one.” Page 35

“The kind of place where time slips and blurs, where a month, a year, a life can go missing.” Page 39

“[...] attraction can look an awful lot like recognition in the wrong light.” Page 56

“The rise isn’t worth the fall.” Page 56

“Being trapped, buried alive, these are the things that scare you when you cannot die.” Page 57

“Funny, how some people take an age to warm, and others simply walk into every room as if it’s home.” Page 58

“Déjà vu. Déjà su. Déjà vécu. Already seen. Already known. Already lived.” Page 66

“[...]a lifetime of knowing brushed away like a tear.” Page 73

“[...] and it is sad, of course, to forget. But it is a lonely thing, to be forgotten. To remember when no one else does.” Page 77

“[...] ideas are so much wilder than memories, that they long and look for ways of taking root.” Page 77

““These days, everyone’s looking down,” muses Sam. “It’s nice to see someone looking up.”” Page 101

“Being forgotten, she thinks, is a bit like going mad. You begin to wonder what is real, if you are real. After all, how can a thing be real if it cannot be remembered?” Page 103

“If a person cannot leave a mark, do they exist?” Page 103

“Dreamer is too soft a word. It conjures thoughts of silken sleep, of lazy days in fields of tall grass, of charcoal smudges on soft parchment.” Page 11

“She considers the cut of their clothes, the absence of bone stays or bustled skirts, and thinks, not for the first time, and certainly not for the last, how much simpler it would be to be a man, how easily they move through the world, and at such little cost.” Page 129

““I remember you.”” Page 135

“The darkness claimed he’d given her freedom, but really, there is no such thing for a woman, not in a world where they are bound up inside their clothes, and sealed inside their homes, a world where only men are given leave to roam.” Page 163

“She watches these men and wonders anew at how open the world is to them, how easy the thresholds.” Page 165

““I think there are many ways to matter.”” Page 179

“But ideas are so much wilder than memories, so much faster to take root.”” Page 210

“He is full of roots, while she has only branches.” Page 212

“Easy to stay on the path when the road is straight and the steps are numbered.” Page 229

“Outside the window, the day just carries on as if nothing’s changed, but it feels like everything has, because Addie LaRue is immortal, and Henry Strauss is damned.” Page 235

“[...]I didn’t want to live forever. I just wanted to live.”” Page 236

““There’s this family photo,” he says, “not the one in the hall, this other one, from back when I was six or seven. That day was awful. Muriel put gum in David’s book and I had a cold, and my parents were fighting right up until the flash went off. And in the photo, we all look so … happy. I remember seeing that picture and realizing that photographs weren’t real. There’s no context, just the illusion that you’re showing a snapshot of a life, but life isn’t snapshots, it’s fluid. So photos are like fictions. I loved that about them. Everyone thinks photography is truth, but it’s just a very convincing lie.”” Page 239

“God, it feels good to be wanted.” Page 256

“[...] And ideas are wilder than memories. They’re like weeds, always finding their way up.”” Page 261

“Homesick—Henry knows that one is supposed to mean sick for home, not from it, but it still feels right.” Page 262

“Dressing up, he thinks, is just like watching cartoons, something you enjoyed as a kid, before it passes through the no man’s land of teen angst, the ironic age of early twenties. And then somehow, miraculously, it crosses back into the realm of the genuine, the nostalgic. A place reserved for wonder.” Page 274

“Bea always says returning to campus is like coming home. But it doesn’t feel that way to Henry. Then again, he never felt at home at home, only a vague sense of dread, the eggshell-laden walk of someone constantly in danger of disappointing.” 282

“He doesn’t know what he believes, hasn’t for a long time, but it’s hard to entirely discount the presence of a higher power when he recently sold his soul to a lower one.” Page 284

““You can’t make people love you, Hen. If it’s not a choice, it isn’t real.”” Page 290

“He has asked the wrong god for the wrong thing, and now he is enough because he is nothing. He is perfect, because he isn’t there.” Page 290

“A life reduced to a block of stone, a patch of grass.” Page 299

“The present folding on top of the past instead of erasing it, replacing it.” Page 306

“She knows the paint will fade, rinsed off by a puddle, or simply wiped away by time, but that’s how memories are supposed to work. There—and then, little by little, gone.” Page 307

“Without the bells, the organ, the bodies crowding in for services, the church feels abandoned. Less a house of worship and more a tomb.” Page 311

“God is so large, why build walls to hold Him in?” Page 311

“Once you know about a thing, you start to see it everywhere. Someone says the words purple elephant, and all of a sudden, you catch sight of them in shop windows and on T-shirts, stuffed animals and billboards, and you wonder how you never noticed.” Page 314

“There is a freedom, after all, in being forgotten.” 325

“Memories are stiff, but thoughts are freer things. They throw out roots, they spread and tangle, and come untethered from their source. They are clever, and stubborn, and perhaps—perhaps—they are in reach.” Page 327

“They’ve been lucky, so lucky, but the trouble with luck is that it always ends.” 329

““You said it yourself, Luc. Ideas are wilder than memories. And I can be wild. I can be stubborn as the weeds, and you will not root me out. And I think you are glad of it. I think that’s why you’ve come, because you are lonely, too.”” Page 332

“She closes her eyes, reminds herself there are many ways to leave a mark, reminds herself that pictures lie.” Page 337

“She may not feel the years weakening her bones, her body going brittle with age, but the weariness is a physical thing, like rot, inside her soul. There are days when she mourns the prospect of another year, another decade, another century. There are nights when she cannot sleep, moments when she lies awake and dreams of dying. But then she wakes, and sees the pink and orange dawn against the clouds, or hears the lament of a lone fiddle, the music and the melody, and remembers there is such beauty in the world. And she does not want to miss it— any of it.” Page 342

“Luc’s smile darkens. “Because time is cruel to all, and crueler still to artists. Because vision weakens, and voices wither, and talent fades.” He leans close, twists a lock of her hair around one finger. “Because happiness is brief, and history is lasting, and in the end,” he says, “everyone wants to be remembered.”” Page 351

“It is a sign, when even gods and devils dread a fight.” Page 367

“And this, he decides, is what a good-bye should be. Not a period, but an ellipsis, a statement trailing off, until someone is there to pick it up. It is a door left open. It is drifting off to sleep.” Page 419

[buckysgoldenheart]

Unexpectedly Bitten

Vampire!Henry Cavill x Reader

Summary: Your ex gets into some trouble with Vampires, and his mistakes lead the bloodsuckers back to you. After seeing you, one vampire gets a little attached and he’s taking his time deciding what he plans to do with you, but whatever it is, you’re not afraid. In fact, you might just be a little attached to him too.

Warnings: cursing, smut, violence. (Count on spelling mistakes or repeating words too often. it’s very likely.)

Notes: Let me emphasize this: there is little rhyme or reason to the way this story is broken into parts. I did my best though, and I stuck to 7. I tried not to make each part too long.

This is a Vampire!Henry x Reader story where each chapter, while chronological, is a different conversation or event during the course of their evolving relationship. 

Words: 1063

Part 2: Guest

Vampires apparently liked to shove and toss humans around like ragdolls, because the minute you were dragged back to the Vampires’ home, or castle, or whatever it was, you were not-so-gently pushed into a large room. It was attractively decorated, clearly not a guest room. His room, you supposed.

You whipped around to find him standing much closer to you than expected, and he chuckled when you jumped back a bit. “Why did you take me? What do you want with me?”

His eyes lit up and he smiled mischievously, and for the first time, you got a glimpse of those weapons their kind called fangs. He then tilted his head down the slightest, bringing his face, his lips, closer to yours. For a blip, the thought entered your mind that he was going to kiss you, fully knowing that if he wanted to, there was nothing you could do about it, but then he said, “I’ve not decided yet.” Your lips parted and he chuckled again. “Get some sleep.”

He left, shutting the large doors behind him. And though you didn’t hear the click of a lock, you figured trying to leave was not an option.

-----------------------------------------

He came back the following morning, or you figured morning. You had no idea how long you’d slept, and thick curtains shielded the windows to hide the sun, so you couldn’t tell the time of day. But you were somewhat rested when you opened your eyes and found him sitting in a nearby chair, staring at you. Oddly, you weren’t uncomfortable. You didn’t fear for your life the way Jason most certainly had.

“Sleep well?”

“Why do you care?” You asked as you sat up and dangled your legs over the edge of the mattress.

When you swallowed uneasily, Henry’s eyes fell to the curve of your throat. His tongue darted out over his bottom lip before he said, “Well, I wouldn’t want my new guest to be uncomfortable.”

“Guest?”

He nodded once. “For now.”

“I’m not scared of you, you know. If you wanted to kill me, you would’ve done it already. And if you aren’t going to kill me, then it means you’re saving me for that vampire leader or king or—”

“Lord,” Henry smirked. “You’re very perceptive for a human of this generation. But while you may not be scared of me, you should fear The Lord.”

“So that is why you took me then. You want me to be a sacrifice?”

He quirked a dark eyebrow. “I don’t know what I want with you yet, Lamb.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

He stood, closed the distance between you, and offered out his hand. “Come on.”

“What are you doing?” You demanded, but Henry only rolled his eyes and grabbed your wrist, pulling you up.

“Taking you to properly meet the man who killed your stupid, little boyfriend.”

----------------------------------------------------

Weeks had passed and you were slowly forgetting the sense of time. You slept when you wanted, you were awake when you wanted, day or night, it didn’t matter because you had a hard time telling which was which. Light didn’t come in their home, and you were never allowed out. Twice, you figured out it was night when Chris left the house on some task, but it didn’t take long to get confused again.

“You don’t leave here often.” You said to Henry as you pushed around the beef on your plate. Henry made sure to feed you, keep you healthy, and so Chris would suddenly show up with a lone cow or pig to be slaughtered. ‘Meat for you, blood for us,’ Chris said, but according to him, the animals did not hold the same nutrition for vampires as they did for you, and so he often mixed it with a bit of stored human blood for flavor and health purposes.

“No,” Henry said.

“Why?”

“Why do you think?” He asked, taking a large sip of blood from his wine glass. It stained the inner part of his lips a deep scarlet that tempted you to lick them.

“So you can watch me to make sure I don’t run amok and accidentally break things in your house?” You joked.

He rose an eyebrow, unimpressed.

“So I don’t escape?”

He snorted.

“So you can keep me safe from other vampires?”

It was meant to be another joke. Keeping a human safe was not the typical concern of a vampire, but the way Henry looked at you after the words passed your lips forced you to reconsider.

Henry took one last sip of his drink, rose from his chair, and looked at you for a beat. “One out of three isn’t exactly a passing score, Lamb. Now finish your food,” He said and turned, but you hopped up fast, catching up before he could escape.

“If I’m going to stay here longer, I need to know more.”

He didn’t stop on his path and you followed close behind. “I don’t see why,” He said, his voice sounding rather displeased with your continued pestering.

You grabbed him by the forearm, and he whipped around on you with a light growl. “You kidnapped me! You haven’t killed me, and I’m not locked in a cell or being starved, so what is it that you want? I’m tired of not knowing!”

He loomed over you, stepping closer until you were forced to look up to meet his stare. “Maybe,” He began, his voice dipping deeper. It’d be frightening to suddenly feel dwarfed by him, if only you didn’t find him far too beautiful to ever be intimidating enough to deter you. “Maybe I just want you all to myself,” He said.

That one sentence fell from his lips like smooth silk, cloaking you in a warmth that sent tingles throughout your body. You gulped.

“Is that what you’d prefer, Lamb?” He hummed. “After all, you haven’t asked that I return you to the sad, little life you shared with that pathetic blood-bag, so I’m not so convinced you don’t want to stay here with me, under my care and protection.”

Your eyes met the rich, dark hardwood beneath your feet, but he placed a knuckle underneath your chin and lifted until your gazes locked.

“Maybe you need to start considering what it is you want from me, Lamb, instead of worrying about what I desire.”

------------------------------------------

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[jamboreeofsurprises]

I might regret admitting this, but i feel like i might as well open up about it. i can always delete it later lol.

A lot of my dysphoria is gender related, but some of it is age related as well and I feel like this is a difficult concept for most people to wrap their minds around. Depression started with the onset of puberty for me. it felt like the beginning of things going downhill, and it has, for the most part, continually gotten worse throughout my teen years and now into adulthood. i never looked forward to growing up whatsoever and the fact that everyone else did only further enforced these feelings. it created a great sense of isolation to feel so differently about all these disturbing changes everyone else seemed ready and excited for. the only person i've ever seen who expressed similar sadness about the end of childhood is the artist henry darger. he felt like it was losing important and precious that he would never be able to get back, and that's how i feel about it too. when i still wanted to play with toys, my friends had already grown past that and lost interest and got rid of theirs and it gravely upset me. i didn't want this, but you have to accept as a living being that you have to grow up.

regardless of how i feel about this, i've tried, of course, to do 'grown up' things as you should as you get older, i went to college, took up some more responsibilities, have a job, have other outlets for money, pay taxes, pay for my things etc., but i have always gravely lagged behind where other people seem capable of doing things. i am 24 now and still feel the same as i did when i was about 12. maybe that isn't that strange, but i don't look that different either. i have childish interests. i fit into most of the same clothes (and actually weigh even less). i'm average height but didn't otherwise grow or change very much. because of gender dysphoria, i'm relieved about this. a lot of people still address or treat me like i'm a child and it's because i look and act like one. but i don't know that i even want to or if it's just because i'm chronically immature.

one of the biggest avenues for 'adult pain' to me is driving. i can't do it. it gives me such bad sensory overload and i've seen my own death via car crash in my mind so many times and to be honest with you i'm pretty sure thats the way im going to go. but because i live in california where it's basically required (and i really dont want to leave here), and my parents, and all my peers here, can do it just fine, and have been doing it since they were teenagers, i have to just do it. so okay i try. and ive already been in like 3 accidents. no they weren't serious but i can't do it. everyone else i know does not have that kind of luck with it. but every time i pleaded with my parents repeatedly that i can't do it they just told me to keep trying and now that i'm moved out they made me the owner of the van. because my mom's mom couldn't drive which 'made her basically crippled' in my mom's words, im going to be a disappointment if i can't do it. but i absolutely cant do it.

someone at a desk today needed to know my age and when i answered it they had some disbelief and asked for it again. when something stupid happens like a car accident and i prove again that im just a dumb child, it make me feel a thousand times more embarrassed than if i actually looked and felt like an adult. because it really does just make me a scared incapable little kid all over again.

i dont even know what's autism or what's dysphoria sometimes but i always need so much fucking help with everything to a humiliating extent. my childhood friend was already cooking and maintaining the house when we were little and driving all over the place as soon as they were old enough too. i cant do any of that now. i can barely fry a god damn egg. and the pressure is on all the time because my friends and parents could do all of it way younger than me. im so tired of being me. im so tired of looking and feeling this way and not being able to do anything.

[wannabemobwife]

Guns, Glamour, Goodfellas - Chapter 12

Chapter 12: Make You Feel My Love

Dad!Mob!Tom x Mom!Mob!Reader

-Pairings: Tom Holland x Reader, Rosie Holland x Henry Osterfield

-Warnings: Amnesia, Sadness, Language, Fluff, Dialogue, Typos

-Words: 6.6K

A/n: Sorry this chapter is long. Heads up, always a lot of dialogue. I get tired of only writing imagery lol. Thanks for reading, I love all your comments so dearly.

Chapter 12: Make You Feel My Love

Words: 6.6K

Everyone’s faces stood emotionless. More than a deer caught in headlights, there was no expression. Tom’s jaw slacked open, standing heartbroken in front of you. How could you not remember him?

After everything he couldn’t even hold you in his arms. No words could describe the room. You had just woken up and said 3 measly words that rewrote history.

“Who are you?” You questioned.

“What?” Tom gasped, his eyes starting to water.

“I don’t know who you are. Where am I?… Who are you people?” You fretted, confused to why you were lying into a hospital bed surrounded by strangers.

“Mom? It’s me. Roo,” Rosie stammered, moving to grab your hand but you just flinched away.

“Harry go get the doctor,” Nikki called out.

“No, I don’t know who you people are. Please get out.”

“Y/N it’s me?” Tom pleaded.

“Who’s Y/N?”

“You, darling,” Tom whispered. Was this all real? It had to be some sick joke.

“No, no! I suggest you all leave. Please, just leave me alone,” you asserted, pressing the nurse call button.

“Mrs. Holland what seems to be the problem?” asked the nurse.

“Who’s Mrs. Holland? I don’t know where I am or why I’m here or who these people are,” you fretted, heart rate starting to spike.

“You don’t recognize anyone here?” Pestered on the nurse.

“No, maybe the young boy and girl, but no,” Tears flooded Rosie and Parker’s eyes.

“Mrs. Holland you’re awake,” called the doctor, Harry brought in.

“Why do people keep calling me that?” You questioned angrily.

“She can’t remember anyone, doctor,” explained the nurse.

“Why don’t we clear out the room and I’ll speak to you all privately outside,” the doctor announced.

“It seems she is suffering retrograde amnesia. It is possibly temporary. You need to talk to her but be careful not overwhelm her. She will feel like her entire life passed her by because she can’t remember it. For now, only a few people in the room. May I suggest her husband and her kids,” explained the doctor.

“What do you mean it might be temporary? She might not ever remember her entire life?” Tom inquired.

“It is uncertain, but yes. Mr. Holland, we are very hopeful that her memory will come back. For now take it slow, showing her photos of you together can help greatly,” concluded the doctor.

“Dad, will mom ever remember me?” Rosie asked teary-eyed.

“I don’t know, baby.”

“Now, come on. We just have to be patient with her.”

“Ok, dad. I’m ready,” said Rosie, trying to hide her tears.

“Parker? Are you with us?” Tom inquired.

“I know she doesn’t remember me but, I don’t want her to see me and not know who I am. If she doesn’t remember me then who am I? I owe my entire life to mom. I don’t understand how she just forgot 16 years of my life,” Parker lamented.

“Hey, we just need to patient. One thing you need to have is faith. That’s all we had waiting to be rescued. Hope, hope that we would see you and your sister again.”

“I’m scared, dad.”

“I know me too. But we have to do this for mom. Ok?” Tom admitted. Parker just nodded in response. They made their way into your room, standing by the foot of your bed.

“Hi, let’s start over. I am Tom. You are Y/N. I am your husband. Your name is Y/N Holland,” Tom began. “This is our son, Parker. He is 16 years old, along with his twin sister. This is our daughter, Rosie….We just want to let you know we will be here for you. Through everything, we want to help you remember if you will let us.”

“Okay,” you whispered. That was the first step, having people to support you.

You were soon discharged a few days later. All set to travel back to London, the home you once knew. Back to the life you shared little to no importance for. All the things you once loved, lost in translation.

The plan ride was painfully long. Tom had yet to hold you in his arms. After watching the life drain out of you, waiting for someone to come, he just wanted to hold you and love you. Let you know you are safe.

He watched as you sat there a few seats away from him. The spark in your eyes non-existent. He didn’t know how to call you over there his when you couldn’t remember him. Almost 20 years of being together, down the drain. He just wanted you back.

Not being able to hug you or hold you or whisper sweet nothings in your ear was killing him. He felt like a recovering drug addict experiencing the process of withdrawal. Everything hurt inside, knowing you forgot him. It was so unfair. How could you survive the helicopter crash but not recognize your own family? You were a shell, a husk of the person you used to be.

Jared, was the one to pick you all up from the airport. The plane ride was nothing compared to the awkwardness of the car ride. You had always been very close with Tom’s staff. William and Jared specifically because you’d see them the most. Jared used to be more your driver but, Tom snatched him up after he saw how close you two were getting. He couldn’t help but be jealous.

You sat next to Tom, almost like a statue. You didn’t know how you were supposed to act. Pulling up to the manor, you were a combination of terrified and astounded. Terrified and astounded at the sheer size and security measures taken.

“Tom, did you pay for the cab?” You asked, hopping out of the car.

“Darling, this is our car. This is our driver, Jared. You two are close,” Tom explained.

“Oh, sorry. Jared it’s nice to meet you,” you waved to him.

“We’ve met before, but it’s nice to see you Y/N,” Jared said, trying to address the elephant in the room.

“Right, sorry.”

“No need to apologize, ma’am.”

“Love, why don’t I make you a cup of tea and you can relax in the living room? The plane ride probably wore you out. However, I know Parker and Rosie have something planned,” Tom interjected.

“Ok, tea would be good,” you responded, walking to the mansion.

“Where’s the living room?” You questioned, afraid you will get lost.

“Oh, it’s ok darling. I’ll take you there,” Tom said, leading the way.

Being here, seemed like an out of body experience. The only thing you knew about yourself was what people told you.

“Here mom. I-I mean Y/N. Please come sit. These are a bunch of photo albums and scrapbooks about our lives. Maybe showing you them will bring something back.”

“Ok… You could call me mom. I don’t mind,” Rosie just nodded in response.

“Look this picture is of your wedding day. It was at this really pretty garden. I wish I could’ve been there,” Rosie reminisced.

“You weren’t?” You asked, confused at her remark.

“No, Parker and I weren’t born yet.”

“Oh, is that you?” You asked, gently raising a finger to a picture captured a perfect moment in time. Parker had just gotten out of a bath and was running naked through the house, he had to be about three or four years old.

“No, that’s Parker,” Rosie remarked.

“Here’s a photo of me. It’s the first day of kindergarten.” Rosie pulled out a photo of her dressed in a blue dress with pink bows in her hair, one on each side hugging her pigtails.

She stood in front of a large gate along with Parker, holding their tin lunch boxes high. Rosie’s lunchbox was a homage to My Little Pony and Parker’s was Transformers. They were all grown up, no longer spending the days with you while Tom worked.

“I’m crying, why?” You questioned, seeing yourself adorned with red puffy eyes in the photo.

“I don’t know, maybe you didn’t want to leave me or Parker,” Rosie explained but was soon cut off by a large clash coming from the kitchen. CRASH, CLANG, THWAP.

“What was that?” You asked, a little startled by the noise.

“I don’t know, I’m going to go check on something. Feel free to keep looking at them.”

You flipped through the countless pages adorned with family photos that documented the milestones. It killed you that you couldn’t remember. You were said to be their mother and if you were anything like your mother, you loved them till it was too much and kissed them and held them. You loved them more than life itself but couldn’t remember why.

About 12 pages in, there was a photo of you in the hospital holding a baby. The caption read “my little Roo.” It was of you and Rosie shortly after she was born. She looked so small, so delicate. Her skin was pale with a hint of rose colored cheeks. The little baby girl in your arms was wrapped in a pink cloth with a pink colored beanie on her head.

She was sleeping so peacefully and you just had the biggest smile imagined on your face. You brought this little girl into the world and couldn’t remember that moment. What own mother can’t remember her baby? Tears pricked at your eyes as you gazed into the picture.

“Dinner is almost ready—Love, what’s wrong why are you crying?” Tom said, coming out of the kitchen.

“I’m sorry. This isn’t fair to any of you,” you cried, letting the tears fall.

“Hey, it’s ok. We are here for you,” Tom whispered, grabbing a hold of your hands.

“I’m still sorry, I don’t remember anything.”

“It’s not your fault. It will come with time,” Tom said, only holding your hands. His main goal was to not overwhelm you and pulling you into a warm embrace may be too much too soon.

“You’re right. I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. What’s for dinner, smells great?” You said, quickly changing the subject.

“Your favorite and specialty so we can’t guarantee it will be as good as you make it but, spaghetti and meatballs,” Tom joked.

“Ok, I’m sure it will be lovely.”

Everyone was dealing with your amnesia differently. Parker would take you on special outings to places you loved and Rosie could barely stand to be in the same room with you. Your sweet and affectionate girl couldn’t as much give a real smile. The only time you spent with her was when she showed you the photo albums. Something clicked in her when you didn’t recognize her in the photo of you holding her a for the first time. Rosie proceeded to cry herself to sleep that night, she couldn’t handle you not recognizing her.

As time progressed it had gotten too hard for Rosie to be around you. Looking at you just reminded her of all the things she had lost. She would stay in her room from dawn till dusk, refusing to see or talk to anyone. Rosie shut everyone out, including Henry. He’d come by quite a lot, begging to see Rosie.

“Hi, can I help you?” You said, answering the door.

“I’m Henry, Harrison’s son and Rosie’s boyfriend,” Henry explained.

“Oh. Sorry I can’t remember anything. Were we close?” You inquired, yet another person you have disappointed by not knowing your own life.

“Yeah, you and Tom were a big part in raising me, aside from my dad. I love you like a son would loved his mother.”

“I’m sorry, I’ll work on it. But I believe Rosie is upstairs, come in,” you responded, inviting the boy in.

“Thanks,” Henry said, quickly making his way upstairs. “Roo, it’s me. I’m coming in,” He said whilst knocking on her door.

“Henry what are you doing here?” Rosie asked, trying to hide her tears.

“You weren’t returning any of my phone calls.”

“There is a reason for that,” Rosie snapped, building a wall that Henry was bound to knock down.

“Hey, I’m here. Talk to me. Talk to me about your mom,” Henry whispered, coming to Rosie’s side.

“What’s there to talk about? She doesn’t remember me. She was my best friend and she doesn’t even know who I am!” Rosie yelled. Needing to let out all her emotions in one single blow.

“Hey, it’s ok. I’m here,” Henry assured.

“Henry, I just want to be alone right now. Could you please leave?” Rosie begged.

“No, I won’t let you push me away. I’m here to help.”

“I want you to go,” Rosie demanded.

“No.” Henry said, holding his ground.

“I’m serious Henry, leave.”

“No, Rosie you need someone to talk to.”

“Can you get out and leave me the fuck alone?” She screamed, this time being pushed over the edge. Flailing her arms back and forth in anger.

“No. I’m not leaving,” Henry knew she needed him, he couldn’t leave anytime soon.

“Really? I’m here screaming at you and you are still here. Why?” All her anger drifted only leaving her sadness. She fell into his arms, breaking from the weight of pain, sobbing.

“Yes, because I love you and I’m staying for you,” Henry reassured. He knew Rosie would need this. Someone who promised to never leave.

“Henry, what do we do if she never remembers? I’m not ready for that. It’s like losing my mom even though she is still alive. All those fun memories of shopping or baking or just talking, gone. I don’t know who I am without her.”

“Rosie, you have to look on the bright side.”

“What’s the fucking bright side? There is none. We took her to all her favorite places today and she still doesn’t remember. There is no fucking bright side!”

“Roo.”

“I lost her. I lost her but she is still here. I’m lucky right? She’s still here living and breathing, but she doesn’t know who I am,” Rosie lamented. “Henry, I love you to pieces but I just need to be alone right now.” Pleading for him to leave, she wished he could stay and comfort her but nothing could do that right now.

“Baby, I don’t want to leave you so upset,” Henry whispered.

“Please. I’m begging you, just go.”

Rosie, didn’t mean to push Henry away. But she couldn’t help it. She needed to release her frustrations out on someone, but there was no one. There was no one to blame for the crash or the loss of your memory. It was all an accident. Henry knew her well enough, where he knew what she needed before she did herself. He already lost Rosie once and promised himself he wouldn’t again.

Parker was the opposite of Rosie, not consumed by his sadness, he was looking for a solution. Anything that could help bring back your memory. He had been taking you to your favorite places around the city. The beach, the library, a coffee shop, and a park you always you took Parker and Rosie to as kids.

To no end, he couldn’t and wouldn’t give up. He couldn’t leave you stuck in that misery. He approached Tom with something that might work.

“Dad, I have an idea. I thought we should create a memory for her.”

“Ok, that might work. Any memory in mind?”

“I was thinking your wedding day,” Parker explained. Tom just nodded in response with a smirk strewn across his face.

Tom was willing to try anything to get you back. It a been a few weeks from the crash and he’s so scared of terrifying you or being too forward. He won’t even lay a hand on your shoulder to comfort you, in case you get scared.

Even though he had yet to hold you once again, Tom refused to leave your side, in case having him around so much would bring your memories back. Have them all come flooding back.

Tom just wanted you by his side. You were sleeping in your bedroom and Tom was in the guest room. Feeling like nothing had changed. It was the same before the accident, you barely acknowledging Tom and Tom sleeping elsewhere. Granted it wasn’t because you were mad at him, it was worse, you couldn’t remember him.

The nights were different, half way through the night you would wake up. Scared wide awake from nightmares that plagued your mind. One night you found Tom taking down a big bottle of scotch by the fireplace.

“What are you doing up?” You asked,

“Drinking,” he said rather harshly, you just brushed it off though.

“Oh, the fireplace is really lovely. I could just read a book out here for hours.”

“You used to. I’d find you asleep in front of the fireplace all the time.” Tom chuckled, reliving those memories.

“Oh, sorry.”

“Y/N! It’s not your god damm fault. STOP FUCKING APOLOGIZING!!!” Tom screamed, chucking his glass at the wall. It shattered into a thousand tiny pieces much how his heart was now.

“Ok, I’m sor—, I just came down for some water. Good night,” you said, trying to mask the tears about to fall. Reverting back to the catatonic emotionless person you’ve been lately.

“Y/N wait!” Tom called after you but you were already gone. This was a side of Tom you’d never met. The old you had and learned to deal with it but it was completely different now.

It was scary, Tom reacting like that. You quickly got your water and made your way back upstairs. If he had that much pent up anger, you were worried he would take it out on you. You didn’t know what to think, everyone were stranger to you and you were a stranger to this life and family.

Coming back to bed, you locked your door and tried to fall back into blissful sleep but it was hard. You stared at the ceiling for quite a while. Begging to go to sleep and wash away this entire night. Tom came to knock on your door about an hour later.

“Y/N. I’m sorry, let me explain myself,” he said, through the thick wooden door.

“I guess you’re asleep by now. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, sweet dreams sweetheart,” Tom whispered, going back to his bed in the guest room. You couldn’t find the will to get up and talk to him.

You came down for some morning coffee, hoping you wouldn’t see Tom. You were scared of the man presumed to be your husband. In truth, you didn’t know anything about him. Only what people had told you. It took you hours to fall asleep after his outburst.

“Oh, you’re up. Y/N could I talk to you?” He asked, coming into view.

“Sure,” you responded. Who are you to say no?

“I’m sorry for my outburst last night. Everything is just so frustrating, nothing you did, ok?” Tom apologized.

“Ok.”

“I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m really sorry. I know you don’t know it but I love you so much and at a time, you loved me just the same. I need you to know that I have never physically hurt you or will in the future.”

“Ok. Thank you. I know you don’t like me saying it but I really am sorry. This shouldn’t be happening, you should be able to love your wife.”

“I do love you,” Tom assured.

“Tom, I’m not the same person and you know it. There’s nothing I can do, it’s just the way it is and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m not the person you fell in love with,” you exclaimed.

“You don’t have to be sorry. You are here, trying to remember for all of us. That’s all that matters,” Tom said, made at himself that you even thought those things.

“Thank you….Could you tell me more about me, I mean the person I was before?” You asked.

“Yeah, darling. I’d love that,” Tom agreed.

“Ok, start with how we met.”

“Well..” Tom started and went on to tell the story of how you met.

Tom was set to meet someone new, a future contact possibly. He was supposed to meet with their assistant to take him to them. He was given strict instructions on what to look for, she would be dressed in a gold mini dress, hair down. Unbeknownst to him, you were the person he was meeting. The most feared mob boss, next to who you had a meeting with, the one and only Tom Holland.

“Hey doll face, I’m here to meet with your boss. Someone they call the Ace of Spades,” Tom said, cornering you at the bar. “Oh, really. Do they know what this is concerning?” you said, smirking. “I should hope so. Can you just take me to him?” Tom demanded. “Certainly, right this way.” You were so ready to eat this guy alive. You lead him to a back room with a bar and large round table. “Wait, there’s no one in here. We’ve been set up,” Tom yelled, alerting Harrison behind him. “What do you mean? There’s you and me, also your consigliere I presume. Why don’t you tell him to back off?” “Alright enough with your games. Where is he?” Tom barked, growing more frustrated by the second “I’m right here, doll face,” you said, in a mocking manner. “Pleasure to meet your acquaintance, I’m Y/N Y/L/N or do you know me as the Ace of Spades,” you sneered, holding out your hand for him to shake.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I was misinformed, well they’re dead. Why don’t I buy you a drink after to make it up to you?” Tom said, he has never been caught off guard before. Barely keeping his cool.

“How about we finish our business here and then you and I go get something to eat, just you and me without your puppy dog, then we call it even,” you smirked, referring to Harrison who always stood so close to Tom.

“How could I say no to having dinner with the most gorgeous woman in the room,” Tom grinned.

“Smooth talker I see, but I’m the only woman the room,” you pointed out

“Doesn’t matter, doesn’t change what I said,” Tom chuckled.

He was starstruck just being in your presence. You were a force to be reckoned with. For him and you it was love at first acquaintance. Couldn’t of been sight because he thought you were a completely different person.

But once he formally met you, he was whipped. The rest is history.

You and Tom talked the day away. Living through your life like you were reading a book or watching a play. The night soon fell and you bid good night.

It was a regular night, but ever since Tom exploded you started to have nightmares. Being jolted out of sleep, trying to catch your breath. One night Tom heard you screaming, he rushed in to check on you.

“Y/N? Darling, are you okay?” Tom asked, concerned after being woken up by your screams.

“I keep having these horrible nightmares,” you choked out, shaking with fear.

“What are they about? You can talk to me.”

“One where I was trapped inside a huge room, tied to a chair. There were scary looking men saying they were gonna kill me, however I couldn’t speak. Like it hurt to speak,” you explained. Tom knew about your common theme with nightmares, unable to make any sound.

He just believed it was because you tried to repress thoughts like that. However, this wasn’t a nightmare, it was a memory. He was trying so hard to suppress his smile. Knowing you were starting to remember things even if it was trauma. It made him hopeful.

“Shhh, it’s was just a dream. It’s ok. I’m here now… can hug you?”

“Mmhm,” you nodded having him pull you into his warm embrace. “It felt so real though. Didn’t you say we were in a helicopter crash?”

“Yes, we were. Do you remember that?”

“I don’t know. My nightmares feel more like memories. I remember the feelings I had, like I felt pain and weak.”

“Well, try and go back to sleep. Just remember they are only figments of your imagination,” Tom said, he was torn between wanting you to remember everything and not scarring you.

“Tom, could you sleep with me tonight?” you asked, not wanting to be alone.

“Yes of course, darling.”

Tom climbed into bed and you moved closer to him. Snuggling right into his side and nuzzling your head by his neck. He rubbed soft circles into your arm as you dozed off. Feeling your soft breaths on his neck as he fell into deep sleep. He finally got to hold you.

Just for a moment, everything was right again. You were his and he had no intentions of letting you go. You felt safe with him, like you were home.

You woke up to a blinding light from the crack in the curtains.

“Tommy, the blinds it so bright…. Screw it. I’m up, can I bring you some breakfast?… What?” You asked, confused as to why Tom was gazing at you with a puzzled expression.

“You called me Tommy,” Tom croaked out.

“I did,” you said, confidently.

“Y/N, do you remember me?”

“Is this a weird game? Of course I remember you, you’re my husband,” you chuckled, playing off his antics.

“Quick, what happened last week?”

“Our helicopter crashed, but we were rescued. I don’t really remember how we got home but, here we are. You were right, we made it. I remember the moments leading up to being rescued, you holding me.”

“Kids come quick!” Tom shouted, loud enough to wake up the entire house.

“What’s going on?” Rosie came in, scared something happened.

“Tom, what are you doing?” You queried.

“Ask her,” Tom said.

“Who am I?” Parker asked, hoping you were his mom again.

“You guys are so weird. You’re Parker, my son. And you are Rosie, my daughter.”

“Mom, I’ve missed you so much,” Rosie shouted, throwing herself into your arms and sobbing.

“Oh, honey. I never left,” you signed, caressing the back of her head.

“I know, but the helicopter crash, I was so scared,” Rosie sniffled.

“Tom, why are you looking at me like that?” You questioned, catching a glimpse of pure adoration streaked across his face.

“Oh, nothing. I just love you, more anything.”

“I love you too…. Parker you’ve been awfully quiet.”

“I missed you mom,” Parker chimed in.

“I missed you too. Ok, I’m really confused, did I go somewhere? Someone fill me in,” you proclaimed.

“Well darling, our helicopter crashed on our way back from Barcelona—” Tom began.

“Yeah, and we’re ok,” you nodded.

“You are now. We were both badly injured and didn’t know if we would make it. You lost your memory. You didn’t know who any of us were,” Tom finished, his tone growing softer.

“What? I-I forgot all of you?” You gasped, your voice breathy.

“It’s ok, love. You’re back now, that’s all that matters,” Tom encouraged.

“Parker? Rosie?” You exclaimed.

“You looked at us and didn’t know who we were,” Parker mumbled.

“Oh babies, I’m sorry,” you whispered on the verge of tears.

“Y/N listen to me, it’s not your fault. Love, it’s ok. You are here now,” Tom reassured. “Kids why don’t you go make mom some tea,” Tom said, needing to talk with you alone.

“Alright dad,” Parker agreed, taking Rosie along with him.

“Y/N? Darling, talk to me,” he said, watching you beat yourself up inside. You head hanging lowly in your hands.

“How could I not remember them?” You cried.

“It was just your mind playing tricks on you. It’s ok.”

“It’s not okay. I put you through all of that.”

“Not on purpose darling.”

“Tom, I have something to get off my chest.”

“Yes, love.”

“I really thought I was going to die. But you were there and you saved me. You brought me back to them, thank you,” you recounted.

“Oh, baby. I was never going to just let you die. There was a moment where I looked over a battered body leaning against me after the crash. Your eyes were closed and I had accepted that you were gone. At that moment, I vowed I’d go too,” Tom concluded.

“Tom, they couldn’t lose both of us.”

“I know, I’m just glad they didn’t lose either of us.”

“I’m sorry.”

“For what, darling?”

“For everything. Our fight. Giving in you a hard time in Barcelona. I love you so much, Tom. I don’t know what I’d do without you,” you cried, letting yourself be completely vulnerable with him once again.

“Hey, you're not going to lose me. I believe it’s the other way around. I can’t live without you and I don’t want to, ever,” Tom said, smashing his lips on yours. God, how he missed you.

And with that, Tom had got his girl back, you. Your lips entangled with his was exactly what he needed. You were back. The love of his life and mother of his children. You were you again with the same spark in your eyes.

Something flipped in your head like a switch during the night. After falling asleep in his arms you dreamt of your life. Almost like a movie played in your head showcasing all the greatest memories.

Parker and Rosie’s first steps, the kids’ 5th birthday, the day you told Tom you were pregnant with twins, Tom’s proposal and so much more. Your memories are what made you who you were, even the bad ones.

All the fights and near death experiences came flooding back. But it wasn’t a feeling of drowning or being held down by the weight, begging for air. It was a feeling of renewal like the water had washed away all the pain and sins. Leaving faint stains of bad memories to be remembered for another day but never forgotten.

Tom brought you back. He was your anchor to the life you once knew. Resting in Tom’s arms felt like home. You knew you were safe.

“It’s so good to have you back in my arms,” he said, savoring every moment.

“I never want to leave,” you said, coming in for another kiss. Shorter this time but still full of longing and unconditional love. Tom broke away as he remembered something.

“Wait,” remembered Tom.

“What?”

“Come on, let’s go downstairs.”

“Why the kids are bringing us tea in bed?” You questioned.

“Just trust me,” Tom concluded.

“Okay,” you said, letting your husband lead the way. Descending the stairs and once reaching the bottom he asked for you close your eyes. You hesitant at first but agreed. He pulled you to the backyard for a much needed surprise.

“Ready. Open your eyes.” You just stood there in complete awe, speechless.

“We had a plan to bring back your memory. We set up the backyard to look just like our wedding,” Tom explained.

The backyard was full of the wedding essentials, an archway at the end of the aisle, chairs for the guests, and so many flowers. Flowers that decorated every pillar and fence, blooming with beautiful shades of lavender.

“Oh my god, it’s as beautiful as I remember it…. Tom I have an idea,” you smirked.

“Yes, darling,” Tom acknowledged.

“What would you say to us renewing our vows?” You asked, hoping he’d say yes.

“I love that idea, sweetheart. When would you want to do it?”

“Today.”

“Today?” Tom asked, stunned by your response.

“Yeah, it’s already all set up like our wedding. Why not?”

“Ok, yeah. Yes. I’m going to re-marry you today. I love you so much,” Tom exclaimed.

“And I’m going to re-marry you today. I love you too,” You grinned.

“Alright we need guests, just family,” Tom beamed.

“And I need a bridesmaid. Rosie?” You cheered, excited to share this day with you daughter.

“You serious?” Rosie asked

“Of course, honey. Now come on, I need a dress,” you said, pulling Rosie upstairs. Even though you were already married you wanted it to be as much as a real wedding as possible. So for the next few hours, you couldn’t see Tom.

Tom was tasked with inviting everyone. Sure it was last minute, but all the family would be there. He found it pretty awkward because he had to tell everyone that you got your memories back and getting married again in one phone call. He called Nikki, Dom, Harry, Sam, Paddy, your parents and Harrison and Henry.

“Haz, come quick. I need you at the house.” Tom left a message on Haz’s voicemail.

“Tom? What happened? I came as soon as I got your call,” Haz screamed, running through the mansion.

“Y/N got her memories back,” Tom cheered.

“That’s amazing. You called me all the way down here for that?” Haz asked, slightly annoyed.

“No, you div. I have a favor to ask….Will you be my best man?” Tom asked.

“Ok, I was already you best man at your wedding years ago,” Haz sneered.

“We are going to renew our vows. I wanted to know if would be my best man?”

“Are you serious?”

“No, you’re only my best friend aside from her. Yes, I’m serious,” Tom remarked sarcastically.

“I honored mate, of course. When is it?”

“In 3 hours,” Tom said stone faced.

“In 3 hours?” Haz screeched. It was so soon.

“Yeah, we set up the backyard to look like her and I’s wedding to bring back her memory.”

“Wait.. who’s officiating?” Haz wondered.

“Harry,” Tom said, trying not to burst into laughter.

“Oh, I’m so ready to watch him fuck that up.”

“Me too, mate. Now come we have a wedding to put on.”

The house erupted in wedding central. Tom had tasked his cook with cooking for 15 people for the reception, he had ordered a cake and called his personal tailor for two matching suits preferably black, just like at your first wedding.

Tom made his way upstairs to tell you about Harry officiating but was stopped by the maid of honor, Rosie.

“Why is this door locked?” Tom asked, angrily shaking the door knob.

“Dad what do you think you are doing?” Rosie asked sternly.

“Wow honey, you look beautiful,” Tom admired his daughter dressed in a light blue dress that dragged on the floor.

“Thanks, dad, it’s mom’s dress.”

“I remember, you look just like your mom.”

“Thanks, but I ask again what are you doing here?” Rosie interjected, not letting his endearing comments distract her from the more important matter. Tom wasn’t allowed to see you before the ceremony.

“I need to talk to your mother.”

“You can’t see the bride before her wedding it’s bad luck,” Rosie exclaimed.

“Please, I don’t believe in stuff like that. Plus we’re already married and happily might I add,” Tom interjected.

“Oh really, no bad luck? How do you explain all the bad things that have happened,” Rosie reminded.

“Umm, that’s not important right now. I need to talk to your mother.”

“Too bad, now shoo,” Rosie said, shooing him away with her hands.

“Fine, I guess she’ll never know THAT HARRY IS OFFICIATING,” Tom shouted as he left.

“Rosie, what did dad want?��� You asked.

“Umm, nothing. Just to tell you that he found the most amazing officiant on short notice,” Rosie sneered, trying to keep it secret from you.

“Oh, good. Now, come here and let me do you hair,” you said, motioning her to the restroom.

It was now time, to remind everyone of a vow you once made.

You were dressed in a white floor length gown, not as near glamorous as you actual wedding dress but it was still beautiful. Your wedding song played again, Make You Feel My Love by Adele, as you came out from behind the corner.

All eyes turned to bask in your beauty. You could see Tom stop breathing, made you laugh a little. You noticed Harry up at the altar and wondered what had Tom done.

Rosie went up first, slowly gliding through the aisle. You followed behind her. Everything was once right with the world. You were about to re-declare your love for your best friend.

“Friends, family and Sam,” Harry said, taking a jab at his brother only to be returned with Sam sticking his tongue out. “We are gathered here today, to celebrate and re-marry Tom and Y/N Holland. If anyone has any objections please speak now or forever hold your peace,” Harry announced.

“I have problem. They’re already married,” Sam yelled from the audience.

“Sam, sit down you div. It’s a vow renewal,” Tom called out from the altar.

“Harry, they don’t ask that at actual weddings,” you whispered to him.

“Well, fuck,” Harry whispered.

“I’ve just been informed that I’m not supposed to say that, my apologies, I’m basing my entire speech on TV. Now I will continue with the proceedings. Can you believe this div, needing two weddings. Two fucking weddings when I haven’t even had one. Can we skip the vows? You’re probably going to say the exact same like thing you said 17 years ago,” Harry announced.

“Absolutely not, that’s the whole purpose. I’ll go first.” You started, taking a minute to breathe and share your heart with everyone there.

“Tom, these past 17 years being your wife have been a dream come true. You are my best friend and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I know it is fucking cheesy but, I can honestly say I found my soulmate, my better half. You make me be a better person and mother. I owe you everything and promise to give you all my love. What do you say, still want me as your wife? Please say yes, because I’m choosing you for then rest of my life. Couldn’t dream of anyone else. I love you, a thousand times over.”

“Y/N, just thinking about everything our love has survived and I’m amazed you have stuck with me through thick and thin. I want to thank you for the beautiful life you have given me and my two beautiful kids. This a declaration of my love for you but also a promise. I promise you will always be appreciated, that I will make you laugh and cry sometimes, appropriately. Falling in love with my best friend and marrying her has been the best decision of my life, I love you and I promise to always keep you safe and always stand by your side.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep. But that one I know you’ll keep,” you cheered.

“By the power vested in me by a shitty website online, I now pronounce you still husband and wife. You may kiss your wife. Children avert your eyes,” Harry concluded as Tom pulled you into a deep, passionate kiss. Nothing will ever be more perfect in that moment.

“Who else needs a cootie shot? Or some booze?” Harry called out, while you and Tom pulled apart.

“Fuck off, Harry,” Tom said, pulling you back in for another kiss.

“Where are we going on our honeymoon?” Tom whispered to you.

“I vote somewhere, we don’t have to fly,” you remarked.

“I second that. God, I love you.”

“You’re just lucky I said yes, Holland.”

“God damm right, I am.” Tom said, his lips getting caught in his smile.

There are moments where words have lost all their meaning and this was one It wasn’t full of sadness, quite the opposite. Nothing could ruin this perfect day. You were his once again.

Guns, Glamour and Goodfellas Masterlist

Taglist: @dummiesshort @thenoddingbunny-blog @adriannauni @bi-lmg @allthisfortommy

[winterscaptain]

redamancy.

Aaron Hotchner x Female Reader a joyful future fic

a/n: the moment you’ve all been waiting for...#5 makes an appearance! (thanks to kira @good-heavens-chris-evans for helping me not be a liar and gassing me up so i could post this tonight like i promised xoxo i love you so much) words: 5.56k warnings: descriptions of childbirth (nothing too gross or graphic), swearing, disgustingly sweet family content

summary: “what strange creatures brothers are!” - jane austen. au!august 2022

masterlist | a joyful future masterlist | ajf faq | taglist edited: january 9th, 2021

“Hey, Aaron?” You peer around the wall to the bedroom from your place on the master bath toilet. There isn't any urgency to your query, which would later make you both laugh until you can't breathe. 

Aaron has a book in his lap and reading glasses resting on his perfect nose, as is usual for bedtime. He turns a page. “Hm?”

“When you get to a good stopping point, can you grab the go bag?” 

“Yeah.” He gets up on autopilot, setting his book down. When he reaches the bedroom doorway, he freezes and turns over his shoulder “Wait. Why?”

“Oh, nothing extreme,” you say, your voice light. “My water just broke and I figured we might -“

Your name leaves his mouth in a laugh, and he trots back to you, helping you up and kneeling to assist you with your comfiest pair of pajama pants. You steady yourself with a hand on his shoulder, stepping into one leg, then the other. Playfully, he snaps the stretchy waistband around you. He's still kneeling before you when he says, “You’re insane, you know that?”

You smile down at him and scrub your fingers through his hair. He leans into your touch like a cat and closes his eyes. “You are too, I’d like to point out.”

He sighs, kissing your belly and resting his cheek on it. “Never said I wasn’t.” He looks up at you. “Is it weird that I’m...a little sad? I’ve loved this part of our lives so much.”

You shake your head. “Me too, my love. And no, It isn’t weird.” 

He holds your hands as he stands and kisses your forehead. 

“We should probably tell Jack it's go time so he can help the little ones when they get up.”

Aaron pauses for a moment, thinking. “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. Isaac isn’t going to clearly remember last time, so he’ll probably be nervous, and this is totally new to the girls.” You reach up and he plants a kiss on your lips. You smile, pleased. 

A little contraction wave hits, and one side of your face screwed up in discomfort. 

Aaron kisses your cheek and says, “I’ll get the rest of the toiletries together.”

You nod, and padded down the hallway, your socked feet swishing a little against the hardwood floors. You knocked twice on Jack’s door, quietly, and waited for his groggy, “Yeah?”

With access granted, you open the door with a little smile, and Jack sits straight up.  You cross to his bed and sit down on the edge, opening your arm to him. Though he’s almost seventeen, he scrambled out from under the covers and tucked in close to you. 

“Your dad and I are headed to the hospital, and Aunt Jess and Em are on their way okay? If you need anything big, dad has his phone and -“

“Mom, we’ve done this before,” he says with a grin. “I know the drill.”

You push the hair off his forehead and kiss him. “I know it, but it makes me feel better. The little ones haven’t done this before, and they’ll probably be a little nervous. Please help your aunts so they aren’t driven to the drink by your sisters.”

He laughs a little, and surprises you by wrapping his arms around your shoulders and pulling you close to him. “Be safe, mom. I love you.” 

Tears prick at your eyes, and you hold him tight. “I love you so much, Jack.”

“Are you scared?”

You press a hand to the back of his head, and he burrows into your neck. “Only a little. I know I’m older, which can make some things difficult, but I’ll always come home to you.”

He nods. “Promise?”

“I promise as much as I can.”

Jack pulls away and swipes quickly at his eyes with the back of his hand. 

“Hey,” your brow crinkles in lighthearted concern. “What’s gotcha?”

He shakes his head. “It’s stupid”

“I can guarantee you it’s not.” While still a bit of a boy, Jack looks very much a man in the dark, lit only by the light of the hallway as the wheels turn in his head. You pick up one of his hands, and he places your linked fingers over your belly. 

“I just - I don’t - Ugh. It’s morbid - Nevermind.”

You huff a laugh. “Baby, remember that one-third of this house hunts serial killers for a living. Nothing is morbid.”

A smile quirks at his lips, but it doesn’t really reach his eyes. “Just be okay? Please?”

You sober and nod, pressing a hand to his cheek. “Jack, do you think I would ever put you or your father into a position that can result in leaving either one of you?”

He shakes his head. “But things happen.”

“They sure do. Your dad will be with me the whole time and he can send you hourly updates if you want. I promise promise promise you’ll be in the loop, baby. I know you like to know.”

Your son’s eyes flicker to the doorway, where a shadow appears. It's Aaron, his backpack on and your go bag in his hand. 

“Ready?” 

You nod, stand (not without effort), and press another kiss to Jack’s head. “I love you bud. I’ll see you when our plus one arrives.” 

The plan is easy: Emily and Jessica are on their way over for the kids, and Dave and Spencer will relieve them after 12 hours. Derek, Savannah, JJ, and Will are only called when the baby arrives, to save them the angst of prematurely wrangling four children between them. 

The hospital is only eighteen minutes away, but with the way Aaron drives, it's more like ten. 

Time is fairly important - with your body accustomed to delivering babies, having done it twice before, there’s a very big chance active labor would only take a few hours, if that. 

Emily and Jess pull up to the house at the same time, both in their pajamas, holding their overnight bags.

“Ready?” Jess asks, kissing your cheek. 

You laugh. “Don’t have much of a choice now, do I?” 

Emily sets her things down and wordlessly hugs you. You wrap your arms around her as best you can. 

“Walk me out?” You ask. 

She slings an arm around your shoulders and you walk back out the front door. She situates you in the passenger seat, and you offer her a small smile. 

“You know,” she starts with a bit of a laugh, “every single time I’m just as nervous as I was when Henry was born.” 

You reach for her hand, and kiss the back of it. “Me too.” 

Everything goes according to plan after that. You sit in the car with your stopwatch while Aaron packs the car, checking the car seat base and putting everything that needs to go up with you in the trunk. Jess and Emily get set up on the couches in the living room, ready to settle in for the night. 

You're uncomfortable, sure, but it isn't unbearable yet. This is the tedious part. 

Miraculously, none of the little ones wake up in the commotion. The magic of white noise machines is never to be underestimated. 

“Time?” He calls from where he leans into the back of the car. He's handling the last details, in full field operations mode. 

You turn around. “5 minutes, 15 seconds.”

“Alright,” he looks up at you and grins widely. “Let’s go, baby.”

+++

Brienne breezes in and checks your charts and your dilation. “It’s go, time, here I think, Momma.”

You sigh and readjust. “Do I have to lay down?” Comfortable as you are, epidural all finished, you still feel a little restless. The alternative is worse - you’d delivered Isaac without any pain management, and thought it was the end of days. You didn’t, and won’t, make that mistake again. 

“Not necessarily, but if you’re going to shuffle around I would suggest a squat for the sake of your blood pressure.”

Another contraction hits, and it knocks the wind out of you. You squeeze Aaron’s hand so hard you fear you’ll break it, and inform him for the third time that morning that you hate his guts. 

“I know, honey. I’m sorry. I know. I’m the worst. Just breathe, okay?” He presses his forehead to your temple, giving you something to focus on. 

It sounds like you tell him to fuck off, but you aren’t sure. The wave crests and then falls, and you slump back against the pillows. “Okay, maybe I do want to lie down.” 

Everyone stifles a chuckle, but you didn't have it in you to be prideful. While you still have a few seconds, you double-check the plan. “Hey Brienne, we’re still good to tie today, right?” 

“Yes, ma’am!” she says, way too chipper for the small morning hour. She speaks quickly, knowing she has to finish her thought before your next contraction. “Soon as we’re all done, we’ll do a really quick procedure and everything will be squared away. If, for some reason, we have to do an emergency cesarean, we can do it right then as well.” 

Brienne is a great obstetrician - she never pulls punches when the news is difficult or stressful. Her straightforward nature immediately endeared her to your whole family. 

It's too much to think about, seeing as another contraction sneaks up on you as you ponder. It felt like only seconds since the last one. 

You're so tired. 

Brienne gestures to Aaron. They developed a bit of a language over the last two deliveries, and he presses a kiss to your temple. “You gotta push, babe.” 

“God, Fuck. I hate you, Aaron. Goddamn you. I’m never letting you near me ever again. Fuck.” A stream of expletives continues to leave you as you push and push and push. 

He only holds your hand and reminds you to breathe and push. He also tells you how much he loves you in between agreeing with your damning assessments. 

If he's honest, he always thinks your ire during childbirth is hilarious. It is kind of his fault, and he can't fathom the physical trauma, so he figures this is a fair role to fill while you do the hard work. 

On a small trough in your final set of contractions, you catch your breath enough to ask for his other hand. This is the hardest part, and it always makes you a little nervous. 

“Aaron, come here. Please.” He drapes his arm around your shoulders, and you grab his hand where it hangs by your collarbone. 

“You’re almost there, darlin’! We’re gonna be crowning here in a second.” You can't see Brienne, totally locked into her task, but her update is a relief. 

You lean heavily into Aaron and he rests his cheek against yours. While this is a shorter labor than both Isaac and the girls’, you're exhausted. Bone-deep tired and hot and cold all at once. 

“You’re doing so well. You’re a superhero. I love you so much.” He whispers his words against you, and you wail as another contraction hit.  Your choice of a walking epidural doesn’t knock the pain out entirely, and it still totally sucks. But again, better than the alternative.

“We’ve got a little Hotchner head! Keep going!” Brienne pats your knee and grins at you, and you follow instructions. “Do you want to catch, Dad?”

Before he can answer, you tell him, “If you move, I’ll kill you,” through your teeth. Aaron shrugs and looks over your head at Brienne, who suppresses a smile. 

There can't be any blood left in Aaron’s upper extremities at this point. In the midst of actively disliking him and your presence in your life in that particular moment, you're so grateful for him you could cry. 

Well, you could cry for a great number of reasons, but that’s definitely one of them. 

A few minutes and a pretty bad time later, a strong cry fills the room and you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. Aaron releases you as you unbutton your gown to expose your chest. 

“Your time to shine, Aaron.” Brienne holds up the umbilical cord clamp and snaps it together twice like a dad at a barbecue. With a smile, he stands and rounds the bed. 

You tried to peer over to see, but you're only able to see Aaron and Brienne.

A smile eats up his whole face. 

“Hi!” His voice pitches up, and you start to cry. 

You just love him so much your chest could just burst. Aaron is always the first person to greet your children as they come into the world, and he never fails to deliver a warm welcome. 

“Right here, right?” He looks to Brienne, and she nods. He cuts the cord, and the nurse crosses the room for measurements. 

Aaron returns to you and removes his own shirt, ready to take the little one while you finish delivery. After his crew neck is thrown to the side, he gathers you up in his arms again. 

There’s nothing you can do but melt into him. His skin is warm and he smells good, whereas your skin felt clammy and you probably smell like a horse’s ass. 

Brienne’s voice comes to you faintly from the other side of the room, iterating the specs of the newest addition. “Baby Boy Hotchner, 5:37am, August 13th, 8 pounds, 14 ounces, 21 inches.”

Okay I'm not crazy. He’s actually huge. 

Aaron scoots even closer as you lean away to get a better look. Brienne sets the still-squalling infant on your chest with gentle, warm hands. Your eyes blur with tears. Aaron isn't any better off, keeping one hand on you and another on your son, his own tears tracking quietly down his cheeks. 

Your son. 

Brienne sighs and says, “Alright, last bit here, and then you’re done.” 

You nod and Aaron takes him off your chest, leaning back with one hand under him and one hand over him. Fluid and other questionable grossness be damned, he ducks his head and presses his cheek to his son’s head, an ineffable joy radiating through his body. 

Aaron’s hands almost completely cover him - with his little knees tucked to his chest, he looks like an angry little loaf of bread. 

The afterbirth is the easy part, but then it was before, too. All the Hotchner kids are massive - even the girls were bigger for twins. 

You always make fun of Aaron for “ripping me to shreds, and not in a fun way.” 

(Okay, fine. Maybe a little in a fun way. Sometimes.)

There’s a little more pressure, and you look down at Brienne’s outline behind that infernal green medical paper shit. “How’s it going down there?”

“I’m getting these suckers tied off so we don’t have any more happy accidents. Don’t mind me.” 

Aaron stifles a laugh and you roll your eyes, still weepy. The nurse passes him a warm, wet washcloth, and he begins to wipe the ick from his son’s skin. 

Brienne finishes up and helps you get adjusted with ice packs and that excellent postpartum underwear. When she's satisfied, she removes her gloves and presses a hand to your bare shoulder. “Beautiful work, momma. He’s perfect.” 

You put a shaky hand over hers. “Thanks.” A little watery laugh leaves you. Ouch. “I’ll miss you.” 

And it's true. Brienne has been a semi-permanent fixture in your life for close to six years and has become a friend. You wouldn’t have any reason to see her again outside of regular check-ups. 

She squeezes your shoulder twice. “You ever need anything, you know who to call. Let someone know when you’re ready to put his name down, and they’ll finish off the birth certificate.” 

With that, she shepherds the nurse out the door, and you're alone with Aaron. 

“So,” you say. 

He smiles, his eyes still trained on the little body who has quickly quieted and is snoozing on his chest. “So?”

“Gimme that.” 

His laugh is warm, and he places little one on your chest again. You prod him awake, feeling only a touch bad about it, and offer him a snack. He latches right away, and you tip your head back in sheer relief. 

“Thank God.” 

Aaron nods in agreement. “That’s one less thing to worry about.” He shakes his head as if shaking something off - no doubt remembering the meltdowns night after night trying to nurse Isaac. 

Little one is still naked to the world, so you point at the little blue blanket folded across the room. “Can you grab that for me?” 

Aaron just looks at you for a second, as if seeing you for the first time.  “Of course.” 

He crosses the room, throws the blanket over his shoulder, and grabs a diaper. While the little one is distracted, he deftly maneuvers the diaper into place and drapes the blanket over him to keep the chill off while maintaining skin-to-skin.

You pull the blanket back a little so you can see his squishy little face. “Can you call Jack?” 

“Do we want to call him now? It’s pretty early.” Aaron leans over to his backpack and pulls his phone out, finding a couple requests for updates from Jess. First things first, he turns the camera on you, and you give him a thumbs up. You detach the little one from your nipple for a second, framing his face with the blanket. Aaron gets a good photo of a yawn and fires both pictures off to the BAU group chat before checking Jess’s messages. 

4:12am How we doin? 4:18am Jack’s up with me. He can’t sleep. Em is dead to the world - she gave up about an hour ago. Give us an update when you can. 

6:02am He’s adorable!!! He’s got your nose though, which is unfortunate. 6:02am Kidding. Maybe. 

Aaron laughs a little, and he looks at you. “He’s up with Jess.”

You nod. “Go ahead and call him. He’ll worry, honey.” 

He nods, and dials the second number on his speed dial. Jack picks up on the first ring. “Dad?”

“Hey, bud.” Aaron can't hide the smile in his voice. “Your brother is here and your mom wants to talk to you.” 

“Can I come see you?” Jack’s voice wavers a little, and Aaron knows it's relief, rather than anxiety. Much like his son, he was more than a little concerned for your safety. Now that it's over, he can finally relax. 

That alone is enough to make anyone emotional. 

Aaron checks his watch. “Are you too tired to drive?” 

“No, no. I’m good. I slept a little after you guys left.” he's quiet for a second. “Can you hand me to mom?”

“Sure, bud.” Aaron nods at you and you smile. He starts to pass the phone over to you then -

“Oh, dad?” Jack’s voice is only a little urgent. 

Aaron pulls the phone back to his ear. “Yeah?”

“I love you.” 

“I love you too, bud. I want to talk to Aunt Jess when you’re done with mom, so don’t hang up, okay?” 

With that, he hands you the phone and fresh tears roll down your cheeks. You know this part comes in waves - the emotions. Your hormones are in shambles, and you forget how intense it is every time. 

“Hey, Jack.” 

“Are you okay how did it go what happened?” All the questions come out in a rush.

You chuckle. Ouch. “Slow down there, kiddo. We’re just fine. It went really smoothly, but the last part happened kind of all at once and I denied your father personal freedom and geographic agency, so we didn’t get a chance to update you.” 

He laughs, and it warms you. “It’s okay. I’m really excited to meet him.” There’s a shuffle, and you assume it's his keys. 

Baby boy is finished eating, just nosing around your chest at this point. You shift, and Hotch catches the phone and holds it to your ear so you can use two hands, bringing little one’s head right under your collarbone, tucking him up again. “He’s excited to meet you, too.”

After Aaron has a chance to debrief and game-plan with Jess (“If you bring the little ones over here before 10am, nobody will have any fun.”), Jack is on his way. 

In the meantime, Aaron sets his phone on the side table and sits on the edge of your bed. “Are we sticking to the name we picked? Does it feel right?”

You nod. “I think so. What do you think?”

You do your best to inch yourself over - Ouch - so Aaron can have a little more space. He stretches out on the bed next to you, on his side with his arm folded under his head. A very large hand covers yours, pulling the blanket down to little one’s chin. 

“He looks like you,” he says. 

You snort. Ouch. “Don’t lie. All your damn kids look like you.”

“Alright, fine.” He relents with a wide smile. “He looks like me.” 

He's quiet for a moment, tracing the apple of little one’s cheek with his finger.  His smile morphs into something soft, pensive. It's the look he always has when he's in awe of his children. “What do you think, little man? Is your name Elliot David? How’s that sitting with you?”

The Elliot David in question just makes contented little staccato sounds from his chest, his brown eyes looking here and there, surprisingly alert. He lets out a little cough, and both you and Aaron let out an, “Oh!” simultaneously in that drawn-out way parents do when their kids surprise themselves. 

You look at him and stifle a laugh just for the sake of your exhausted muscles. Aaron’s smile soon turns shaky, and tears fall onto his elbow where it rests under his head. He takes a big breath, and it catches on the way out. 

“Oh, honey. Come here.” 

You adjust again, bringing the head of the bed down with the little remote. As you recline, you only need one hand to keep Elliot secure. You raise your other arm, and Aaron scoots under it, resting his head in the crook of your chest and shoulder. He snaps some buttons on your gown in the absent-minded interest of keeping Jack relatively unscarred. 

Aaron’s bare arm is warm under your fingers. You trace little patterns into his skin as he stares at the back of his son’s head. Elliot’s impossibly small hand catches Aaron’s finger in that death grip only babies seem to have. 

Aaron doesn’t care he's nearly twenty-four hours without sleep, missing a shirt, and really hungry. The only things that matter in this moment are right here in front of him. 

There’s no need to speak. 

A nurse stops by and drops off the bedside cradle, speaking quietly. “You can put him in here when you’re ready to get some rest.” 

You look up and thank him. “Oh, and we’d like to finish the birth certificate in a few hours. Will that be alright?”

He nods. “Just fine.” He checks your charts and leaves a few moments later. 

Soon after, the door slips open, and Jack’s head pops in. “Hi!” He stage-whispers. “Lemme see him.” 

Aaron is stuck where he is, still locked in by Elliot’s grip, so Jack crosses to your other side, pulling up a chair as close as he can get it. 

There is a sense of finality to this meeting. Elliot is your last child, and this is the last time the Three Musketeers will sit together, meeting the newest member of their family. 

“Oh man, Mom. He’s so cute.” Jack coos and ducks so he's eye-level with his baby brother. He traces a finger along Elliot’s tiny, straight nose. When he rests his head on your upper arm, you kiss his head. All three of you sit there until the sun rises, watching Elliot fall asleep. Aaron follows suit eventually, his breath fanning slow and even across your chest. 

+++

The three of you are relatively well-rested by the time your family comes to bombard you. 

Elliot woke twice in the early morning - once to be fed and the other to be changed. Jack retreated to the recliner after a certain point, and Aaron threw on a sweatshirt and curled up next to you for the duration. They're still out cold, while you rest somewhere between sleep and wakefulness. 

One of the nurses on rotation pops her head in. You wave at her with the tips of your fingers. 

“Your family is here to see you.” 

That wakes you up. You make an ‘eek’ face. “All of them?”

She nods. “Three at a time?” 

“Please.” You reach over and pick up a neatly-swaddled Elliot and tuck him into your elbow. You check the corner, where Jack still sleeps. You're sure a train could drive through the room and he’d still be out. That kid has sleeping superpowers - being sixteen only helped.  

Jess is first, holding the girls’ hands while Isaac trails a little behind. 

You put a finger to your lips and point to Elliot. “He’s sleeping, so you have to be really quiet, okay?”

Caroline clambers up on the bed with a few reminders to “be gentle with Mom and don’t lean on her too much,” and peers over you. “Is Daddy sleeping?”

You look to your right, and sure enough, Aaron is out like a light again, performance evaluations on his chest, his hand relaxed around his pen. “Yeah, baby. Daddy’s sleeping because he's awake for a really long time helping me with Elliot.” 

Newly reminded of the main event, Caro plants herself by your knee while Sophia sits by your hip, taking the good real estate. You look over at Jess and wink. She slips out, closing the door softly behind her. 

You scoot over so you're flush with Aaron’s side. “Come on up here, bubba.” 

Isaac gives you a little smile and perches at your side. “He’s so small.” 

“Yep. And look at that,” you brush your fingers down Elliot’s nose and tap his cupid bow before doing the same to Isaac. “You have the same nose.” 

Isaac smiles and raises a tentative hand. He hesitates right before he reaches the dark brown peach fuzz that sits in unmanageable cowlicks on Elliot’s head. 

“You can touch him, bub. Just be gentle.” Isaac’s hand smooths over Elliot’s head with next-to-no pressure. “Do you remember when Sophia and Caroline were born?” 

Isaac nods. “It was super cool.”

“It was super cool.” You kiss his forehead and adjust your hold on Elliot. “Sophia, love, can you hand me the pillow that’s by Daddy’s knee.” 

She nods and very carefully presents it to you. You show her how to stuff it under your elbow so you can relax while supporting Elliot’s head. Caro is clearly enamored, her eyes never leaving Elliot’s face. 

“Babies are really delicate,” you remind a wiggling Sophia. “Their heads are too heavy for their little necks, so sometimes they need a little help.” 

At the mention of ‘help,’ Aaron’s eyes snap open. “What’s up?”  

You suppress a laugh as he realizes all of his kids surround him like the children of the corn. He presses a hand to his face, recovering. “Oh. Hi.”

Caro beams at him, and he beams right back. He puts his files down and pats his lap. “Come here, my little love. I’ve got a really good view over here.” 

She very mindfully picks her way over your shins and into her father’s lap. He lifts her so she's flush to his chest. His cheek presses into her hair, and he shows her where to find Elliot’s little baby toes under the blanket. 

“Are his feet very very small?” Caroline’s whispered question almost makes Aaron cry again. 

“Yes. They are very very small. So are his hands. Here, look.” 

He reaches over and peels back a layer of blanket, exposing one of Elliot’s (very very) small hands, pressed flat against the fabric. Aaron wiggles his finger under it and presents it to the kids. “If you look really carefully, you all have the same hands.” 

All at once, three pairs of hands appear, flipping their palms up and down as each one individually assesses the similarities. 

“And if you look even closer,” he says, flipping his palm down, but keeping Elliot’s hand aloft, “I have the same hands as all of you, too.”

Caroline looks up at him, awestruck and he nods. She places her hand on the back of Aaron’s and - lo and behold - they're the same shape, just significantly different sizes. 

Satisfied, Sophia drops her hands, leaning on them to get a closer, yet stable, look at Elliot’s fingers. 

She gasps, but to her credit, keeps her voice soft as she says, “Look at his tiny little nails!” 

“Lemme see!” Aaron supports Caro as she thrusts her body forward to get a better look. 

Jack stirs in the corner, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. In full voice, he says, “Oh, hey guys.” 

Three big shushes come from the kids, and it takes everything in you to keep your laugh locked away. You keep your eyes trained on Sophia (who looks downright offended at Jack’s volume) knowing if you look at Aaron you’d be done for. 

Jack makes the same ‘eek’ face you made earlier. “Sorry, sorry.” He creeps over, standing behind Sophia and putting his hands on her shoulders. She giggles quietly as he drops close to her ear. “Cute, huh?”

She wrinkles her nose. “He looks a little funny.” 

“He’ll start to look more like a person in a few weeks,” Aaron says with a smile. “You looked pretty funny the day you're born, maybe even funnier.”

He winks at her, and she dissolves into a fit of giggles again, leaning back against Jack. As she did so, her brother wrapped her in his arms and rested his chin on her head. 

Isaac runs his hand over Elliot’s hair, gentle and repetitive. He, like Jack did hours earlier, rests his head against your shoulder. You press your cheek to the crown of his head, soaking it in. 

“I like him.” 

A smile breaks your face in half, and you peer around to look at Isaac’s face. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. He’s cool.” 

Your bottom lip disappears into your mouth as you fight back tears, still ready to flow without fair warning. You don’t want to scare them. “I’m so glad you think so, bubba.” 

Elliot has once again taken Aaron’s finger hostage, and it takes more than a little negotiation to get him unwrapped and tucked back into his blanket. You have no idea how Elliot manages to sleep through all the commotion, but then again, he’ll have to get used to it. 

Jess pokes her head back in. “Ready for some lunch?”

Four heads whip around and nod vigorously. Aaron deposits Caro on the floor, while Isaac presses a heart-wrenching kiss to Elliot’s head before gingerly getting his feet back under him. Jack just lifts Sophia and she hangs off his hip, only a little too big. 

He walks to you and kisses your cheek. “I love you, Mom.”

You bring your hand up to his temple, the back of your fingers brushing his hair back. “I love you too, my Jack.” 

One side of his mouth turns up in a smile, and he leaves the room with Sophia, leading the rest of the pack down the hallway. 

+++

It's safe to say Dave immediately covets his namesake. You plop Elliot into his arms right away, and say, “This is Elliot David Hotchner. He’s been very excited to meet you.”

Dave full-on cries, letting the tears just fall onto his shirt as he bounces Elliot all around the room, talking to him about all the ways he’ll spoil him rotten. 

It’s easy to name him after Rossi. When you finally decided on a couple of first names, it was a no-brainer to pair them up with David. He’s your family, like they all are, but you're acutely aware that Elliot will have the smallest amount of time with Dave, no matter how much time that will be. 

When Dave is ready to give him up, he reluctantly passes him back to Aaron. Dave crosses to you while Aaron offers Elliot a knuckle to mouth around on. 

Dave kisses your cheeks and embraces you. He leans back to look at you, keeping his hands on your face. You cover his hands with your own and close your eyes. 

You're taking a lot of mental pictures today. 

He presses a kiss to your forehead, and you're sure you see Aaron’s one-handed camera work out of the corner of your eye. 

“Thank you, bellissima.” 

“You’ve more than earned it,” you remind him.  

“Dealing with you two for fifteen years? You’re damn right I have.”

+++

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[fahhhhq]

Never Say Never - Parte Nona

Pairing: Henry Cavill x Reader (Fem)

WaRnInGs: Fluffy fluff.

Summary: The connection you and Henry have is indescribable, but when it comes to getting close to someone, running is what you have always done best. Is being with Henry finally going to change the way you view love, or will you again run?

Thank You for reading, baby dolls🤍

If you want to read parts 1-8, click right hurr

P.s. sorry it’s kinda short. the next one(s) will be longer ;) 

***

            As you stand in front of the elevator at 4 in the morning, it suddenly daunts on you that you have nowhere to go. Sadness again consumes you and more tears spill from your eyes. You push the button to go down, but as you get into the elevator, you suddenly remember that you do have a room. You look inside your purse and find your key. You press your previous floor and suddenly you are there.

You are thankful your key still works. But when you enter the room, it feels empty and smaller. Henry’s presence was so intense, that not being with him was like falling into a deep pool and not being able to swim up. Being with him was being able to breathe.

The emptiness not only in the room but in your heart, make you sob harder. You pull the covers off the bed where you first made love to Henry and get in. The cold hitting you like a cold bucket of water, so you pull the covers over you.

You imagine Henry kissing your forehead and cuddling to you, but soon that fantasy vanishes, and you cry yourself to sleep.

*********

You wake up feeling Henry caressing your face, but soon realize that you were just dreaming. Your eyes feel heavy and crusty from so much crying. You look at the clock and you can barely see that its 1:20 p.m.

Your phone pings and it takes you out of your pity-party trance.

You check it and you have ten missed calls and a few text messages. All from Henry.

“Y/N, please answer me.”

“Why did you leave?”

“I need to know you’re ok.”

“I know a million things are going through your head, but I need to hear you.”

“I'm not ready for this to end, and I know you aren’t either.

A knot forms in your throat and your heart constricts. You had never had this intense feeling for someone, and it was not a sensation that you wanted to ever feel.

Henry mentioning that he did not want whatever you guys had going on to end gave you a little hope. But how would that work. He was a world-famous actor, and you were no one. How would that work? It would not.

With a heavy heart, you decide not to answer him. You put your phone face down on the nightstand and lay back down.

After spending a few more moments in bed looking outside, wishing you were spending the day with Henry and then feeling like shit, you decide to get up. You wash your body, and it feels like a blur. You try not to remember the time you and Henry took that amazing shower, so you shower in record time.

After changing and ordering food, you lay back down in bed and you feel a sense of loneliness that you’ve never really felt before. Henry had become more than a guy you had sex with, he had become a friend. In the past few days, you had laughed more than you had in a long time. You enjoyed spending every second with him, even when you were silent. You enjoyed being with Henry more than you enjoyed being by yourself. And that was saying a lot. It was not only the lust that you felt for him, or how handsome he was, it was that need to be with him, around him.

Your only fear was if he felt the same way.

And then you hear your phone ping again. Your stomach drops.

“Although I have had my heart broken many times, the pain I felt before is nothing compared to how my heart feels now. I cannot bare to lose you…”

It feels like your heart is actually aching. There’s a knot in your throat. Henry’s words hitting you like a bucket of ice-water. Making you think that maybe you weren't the only one that felt the way you did.

Then your phone pings again:

“I know you leave for Italy tomorrow, but I don’t want this to end… I want to spend more time with you. I'm not ready to say goodbye.”

Did he just say he wanted to go to Italy with you?

For some reason that scared the shit out of you, but at the same time, your heart was thrilled. What now, you think. What was keeping you from going to him and telling him that you did not want this to end either, that you wanted him to go to Italy with you.

Nothing.

Because you were fucking tired of running. You had been running from love for far too long, and Henry was definitely worth stopping for.  

Your stomach becomes invaded by butterflies when you get up from bed. You were doing this; you were going for it. You did not even change. You grab your key and your phone, put on your slippers, but when you check yourself in the mirror, you realize that your eyes are puffy, and your hair is sort of a mess. Fuck.

After you put some BB cream on your face and brush your hair a little, you are walking to the elevator. Your stomach in knots because you are already doubting yourself. Stop it, you say to yourself.

You arrive on his floor and slowly walk to his room because you realize that you are not sure if he’s still in the room. You stand outside his door, nervous, but decide to go for it. Knock, knock, knock. And the door flies open.

Henry’s beautiful eyes find yours. That chemistry going off like in the movies. Or at least that is how it felt for you. Your heart racing and the butterflies in your stomach ragging like if in a rave.

His curls disheveled, and his stubble darker. And that elegant nose, sharp jawline and graceful eyebrows making you weak because those are the parts that make him so perfect to you.

“Hi,” you finally say. He can hear the shyness in your voice.

“Hullo,” Henry responds in a husky and rich tone that grabs you by your neck.

“Can I come in?” you ask, worried that he might say no.

He frowns, “Of course,” he quickly says and opens the door wider.

When you pass by him you feel the heat radiating off of him. You had become so accustomed to it that you wanted to feel his heat on your skin again.

When you are inside the room you turn to him, his sapphire eyes cutting straight to yours with little hesitation and clearness, that you shiver all over. You see the fire and the passion that these past few days have burned you to the core it feels like its burning you all over.

And without a moment’s hesitation, Henry takes a few steps and sweeps you up in his arms. Your arms and legs automatically wrap around him. He squeezes you hard against him and then his soft lips find yours in a hurried manner. Like if you were both finally able to breathe. You both kiss each other like if you have not seen each other in a year.

When you part, you are breathless. You can already feel your lips swollen of the pressure both of you were kissing each other with. You grab the side of his face and look at him with sadness in your eyes, your lip trembling, “I'm sorry I left.”

“You came back, that’s all that matters,” He whispers in a low voice. With his thumb, Henry wipes away a tear you did not know had fallen. You feel embarrassed that he is seeing how much the thought of leaving him hurt you. But in the back of your mind, you know he feels the same way.

He lets you down but doesn’t let you go. “Don’t leave me again,” he says searching your eyes for something, not sure what.

With your arms still around his neck you say, “I’m done running. I’ve done it for so long, I'm tired.” You lean forward and lean your forehead against his shoulder, nestling his neck. But then you pull back and look straight into his baby-blues, “Please don’t hurt me.”

Henry’s strong brows knit together and places a hand on your jaw, his thumb on your lower lip, “Never.”

Your lip trembles, “Never say never…”

He places his forehead against yours and takes a deep breath, “This is the first time in my life where risking it all for a person is finally worth it.  I met you a few days ago and what I feel for you, I did not even feel it when I was engaged. So yes, when I tell you ‘never’, I mean never.”

Henry leans in and places a tender kiss on your lips. It sends a frisson down your body.

“So, it’s not just me that feels this?” you say quietly staring into his eyes.

He shakes his head. “Fuck no,” he smiles and you both chuckle happily.

***

Later, the two of you are curled up in bed watching television, laughing in unison to the funny parts and excited in the action scenes. Making you even happier of how much you have in common, and grateful that what do not have in common you actually appreciate.

“So, you want to go to Italy with me?” you ask when nothing important is happening. You turn in his arms and face him. You place your hand on his hairy chest and lightly massage.

Henry wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you more towards him, “If you’ll let me.”

You roll your eyes, “Duh. But I thought you said you had more press to do this week.”

“That’s right,” he thinks about it a little and then says, “What if you push your trip back a few days? I’ll pay for all the upgrades and the changes to your itinerary.”

“Really? Are you sure?”

Henry smiles tenderly, “Anything to go on this Vacation with you.”

“Ok,” you smile. “It’ll give me something to do.”

Henry presses his hand to the side of your face and then traces your lower lip, studying the surfaces of your face. Like you’ve done so many times to his.

“You’ve been to Italy before, no?” you asked.

He raises a brow and nods, “Mh-mmm, but only for press and to shoot some videos, but I haven’t really been to the places you have planned to visit. First time, I’m going as a true tourist.” He smiles gladly.

You grin, “So, what you're saying is that we’re both going to pop our cherries?”

Henry squeezes you ass and grins, “Oh, I'm going to pop your cherry in every town we visit.”

You press at his chest and raise a brow, “Sir, we’re going to a lot of towns, a month’s worth of towns.”

He gifts you a cheeky grin, “Oh, I know.” With a growl he leans in fast and burrows his face on your neck, biting it. You yelp and laugh, lightly pushing at his chest but wrapping a leg over his hip. He continues to growl and nibble, and you continue to act like its not a fucking turn on.

After more laughing and chatting, you both end the night with your arms still wrapped around each other. Like if letting go of you would be losing you again. But you did not want to leave again. For some reason, when he said that he did not want to lose you, ever, you believed him. Really believed him.

You couldn’t wait to travel with him, and you were as excited to continue to get to know him. You wanted to know everything about him and him about you.

They say if you really want to get to know a person, traveling is the best way. So, you knew Italy had something special in store for you.  

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