#held the same sister's hand in hospital

[pushing500]

I just caught up with Mechi and my god I love Kwahu, the comics with them are so sweet. I hope you have a nice day!

I'm so glad you like Kwahu as much as I do <3 <3

What could be better than one grouchy researcher with no social skills? That's easy! Two grouchy researchers with no social skills! Long live the Jones "twins"

[ellecdc]

a marauders guide to siblings

Sirius Black x Potter!reader + moonwater + jily [1.4k words]

CW: fem!reader, reader is James' twin, siblings

James loved love. Like, if someone were to ask James what his favourite thing was, first he would say quidditch, then he would say pranking, then he’d probably say his beautiful girlfriend Lily, and then he would absolutely without a doubt say love.

Oh, and maybe also he’d say ABBA, but the order wasn’t important, alright? The point was: James loved love.

So, once the rest of his mates found partners of their own (save Peter), he immediately began begging them for a triple date. But for as mischievous as his friends were, they were equally (if not painfully more) stubborn.

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“Please!?”

“I said no, James.” Remus sighed as he rubbed harshly at his eyes; and sure, perhaps cornering him in the hospital wing following a full moon when he had nowhere to run nor hide from James’ pestering wasn’t very couth of James, but in James’ defence, he-

“POTTER.” Regulus barked from the door to the hospital wing that he just burst through, completely ignoring the reproachful shushing from the matron. “I swear to Salazar if you do not step away from my boyfriend, I-”

Except James never got to hear what Regulus planned on doing if he did not step away from his boyfriend because James - a smart man - chose that moment to shout “promise me you’ll think about it, moons!” before fleeing from the room. 

It had gone just about the same with Sirius. 

“No can do, Prongsie boy.” Sirius drawled without looking up from his study notes.

“And just why not?” James spat, obviously having had it up to here with his sodding no good best friends anyone could ever ask for. 

Sirius hummed as he looked off into the distance like he was giving this question actual thought. “Oh, right. Because I don’t want to.” He deadpanned.

“Why not.”

“James.” Sirius hissed as he sat up straighter, eyeing the librarian who was eyeing the two infamous marauders right back. “I have no interest in sitting at a table with my brother as he makes googly eyes at my best friend, nor-” he paused as he held his hand up when James went to interject, “do I want to sit at a table with my girlfriends brother as I make googly eyes at her.” 

“Then just don’t make googly eyes at my sister.” James hissed back, earning him a scoff.

“Have you seen your sister? That’s impossible.”

“Eugh.”

“See.” Sirius accused, raising a knowing eyebrow at him. “I’m not doing it.” 

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But if there was one thing James hated in equal measure as he loved love, it was quitting.

And in case that wasn’t clear; James hated quitting. 

“Oh good, you’re all here.” You announced robotically as you approached Remus, Regulus, Lily, and Sirius at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall.

“You alright, Potter?” Regulus questioned slowly, looking between Sirius and Remus concernedly as they both let out a groan.

“What now?” Sirius muttered as he pinched the space between his brows.

“I’m supposed to say…” you continued, pausing to pull a cue card from your pocket and reading directly from it. “As you all know, the wonderful and momentous anniversary of James Fleamont Potter’s birth is approaching-”

You hardly spared a breath for the unimpressed snort from Remus at the fact that you and James shared a sodding birthday.

“-and his one wish - in place of any gifts - is for all of us to accompany him to one triple date at The Three Broomsticks on the next Hogsmeade weekend.” You finished, only looking up at the group when you finished reciting your script before pocketing it again. 

“What exactly do you get out of this arrangement?” Lily asked as she leaned back in her chair.

“A triple date?” You answered in the form of a question.

“What do you really get out of this?” Remus asked with a laugh.

“James promised me an unlimited amount of jelly slugs for the rest of the school year.” You offered bashfully.

“Oh.” Sirius groaned theatrically before pulling you into his lap. “My poor sweet girl, being coerced by means of sweets.” He cooed pathetically into your hair. 

“Does that mean you’ll do it?!” James shrieked excitedly as he appeared out of bloody fucking no where. 

“Circe’s fucking tits.” Regulus hissed as he clutched at his chest. 

Sirius scoffed as he removed one arm from around your waist to gesture at his brother. “Look what you’ve done now, James; you’ve reduced my baby brother to swears and blasphemy. What do you have to say for yourself?”

“Please?” James asked quietly; puppy dog eyes darting nervously between his best friends, his girlfriend, his best friend’s boyfriend, and his sister.

And finally, after months of begging and badgering and whining and pestering, James finally got his triple date. 

Except…except something was bothering James…

Which was weird, because it was perfect. 

James got to see Regulus smile for quite possibly the first time ever when Remus offered him a bite of his meal from his own fork and then immediately stole a kiss when Regulus wasn’t paying attention. 

For as wound up and fidgety you’d been on the walk down to Hogsmeade, James watched any and all tension melt from your body the second Sirius pulled a chair out for you, situated himself in the spot next to it and threw his arm over you like that’s where it was simply meant to be. 

And the sound of Lily’s bubbling laughter echoed somewhere deep in James’ rib cage every time Sirius or Remus took the piss at James’ expense. 

“Oh, James, you’d really like this.” You insisted then, interrupting James from his musings as you held your plate out for him to take a helping for his own plate. 

“Awe, you guys are sweet.” Lily commented before she accepted a bite from James who had, indeed, really liked what you had ordered. 

“Remus is already feeding you enough over there, don’t even think about it.” Sirius called over to Regulus who was actually not thinking about it at all, thank you very much, earning him a glare from his brother. 

And that’s when it hit James.

“Wait a second.” He commented, causing everyone to look at him warily. “Sirius is dating my sister,” he started, ignoring Sirius’ groan and Remus’ quiet ‘here we go’, “and Remus is dating Sirius’ brother…then what about me?”

Regulus let out an inelegant snort as Lily scoffed in offence. “What do you mean ‘what about me’!?” She shrilled. 

“Prongs, listen,” Sirius whispered conspiratorially, “I don’t want to alarm you, but you’re very close to losing the girl you spent six long years trying to snag.”

But before James could blanche (or beg for Lily’s forgiveness), Remus chuckled. “Don’t worry, James. I’ll claim Lily as a sibling and then you can be dating my sister.”

“What the fuck?” Regulus muttered at the same time Lily murmured “you’ll what?” and James cheered “that’s brilliant!”. 

“Why on earth would that matter?” Regulus asked, though the end of his sentence trailed off when you started shaking your head. 

“It’s best not to question it, Reg.” You offered him knowingly. 

“Fine.” Lily muttered, nodding her chin over at Remus. “Then you have to share your chips.” 

In response, Remus lobbed one across the table, hitting her right in the forehead which started a petty sibling squabble right there in the middle of The Three Broomsticks.

“Yes.” James whispered reverently. “This is perfect.” 

“Were the jelly slugs worth it then?” Sirius murmured into your cheek as James cackled at the pettiness between the pseudo-siblings and Regulus threatened to bring them all back to the castle with no dessert if they didn’t smarten up. 

You smirked as you turned your face towards his, though he made no effort to create space for you which left the two of you basically nose to nose. “At least I got something out of this.”

“I got something out of this.” Sirius said easily, continuing when you raised an eyebrow at him. “I got to spend an evening with my girl. That’s worth any nonsense.” 

You smiled before pressing a chaste kiss to his lips, reciprocating quickly when he greedily demanded more. “Well then, happy birthday to James Potter, I guess.”

Happy birthday to James, indeed.

[steddieas-shegoes]

At ten years old, Eddie’s mama gets a raise at work just in time for Christmas. This is the same year Wayne works enough to set aside almost $200 for Eddie’s Christmas presents.

Eddie doesn’t know this, and he’s a kid who knows better than to expect more than a few things in his stocking and one or two “bigger gifts” -usually books or tapes- so it’s a surprise when his stocking is overflowing and there’s a huge box under the tree Christmas morning.

Even more surprising is that it’s labeled from Santa, and Eddie hasn’t believed in Santa for nearly three years despite everyone in his classes still believing. He bounces on his feet while he waits for Wayne to get his coffee, for his mama to finish making their special hot chocolate.

The year he gets his first guitar is also the year he finds out his mama can sing like a rock star.

It’s the year he finds out Wayne used to play bluegrass at a bar back home and probably could’ve made it big if he was willing to leave his sister.

It’s the year Eddie finds out he can play by ear and uses it to his advantage to learn all his favorite songs as soon as he figures out the chords.

And for years, he is quick to pull out his acoustic to learn something new, even when he manages to buy his electric with money from helping fix cars at the shop where his uncle’s friend works.

After he saves Hawkins, and his hands stop shaking enough for him to play, he asks Steve to bring his acoustic to the hospital so he can entertain himself. Steve shares a look with Wayne, then his mama.

“It, uh, didn’t survive…everything.”

Nothing broke his heart quite like hearing that.

He pretends it’s okay though, doesn’t want his mama and Wayne to feel worse than they already did about everything.

He tables his emotions until he’s alone that night, shortly after dinner when everyone goes home to get some rest before the next day of volunteering, and cleaning, and visiting.

He’s woken up in the middle of the night by the door opening, and even though the person coming in is trying to be quiet, the door creaks from the building settling funny during the “earthquake.”

“Steve?”

Steve turns and even in the dark, Eddie can see his blush.

He’s holding something.

Something big and guitar shaped.

“What have you done?”

Steve walks over to him and gently sets the guitar case in his lap.

Eddie opens it and sees a gently used acoustic with Eddie’s name now engraved on the side.

“Steve.”

“You can have nice things. You should have nice things. We don’t have many options right now, but at least you won’t get rusty.”

Eddie cried.

Steve held him.

And after Steve wiped his tears away and kissed his forehead—which was something they’d be talking about as soon as Eddie could focus on something other than the guitar in his lap— he played slower songs, songs that even Steve could recognize, until a nurse realized Steve was here past visiting hours and kicked him out.

When his mama saw it the next morning propped by his bed, she smiled knowingly.

“I see the boy followed through.”

“What?”

“He asked me all kinds of questions about guitars and what your old one looked like and if a used one would be okay. Don’t know how he found one so quick.”

“He’s pretty determined when he sets his mind to something.”

“I think he’s set his mind on you, baby.”

Eddie thought maybe she was right.

[sunny44]

Meeting Hazel

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Wife&mom!reader

Warnings: hospital, mentions of birth

Summary: Y/n and Charles welcome their second born.

Finally, the hustle and bustle of the hospital had subsided. After hours of labor, I finally held our little Hazel in my arms. Her angelic face, wrapped in a soft pink blanket, seemed too perfect to be real. I looked at Charles, my husband, who smiled radiantly beside me, his eyes shining with pure admiration and love.

“You did an amazing job, amour.” he murmured, kissing my forehead tenderly. “She’s perfect.”

I smiled, tears of happiness streaming down my face.

“Thank you, Charles. I couldn’t have done it without you.” He smiled. “Literally couldn’t.”

“Very funny.” He gently brushed my forehead. “She’s perfect.”

“She is.” I smiled, looking at her. “But it’s the second time I get pregnant and the second time they look just like you.”

“What can I say, I’m very good at what I do.” He held my hand delicately, his fingers intertwining with mine.

“I’ll always be by your side, Y/n. And now we have our little family complete.”

As we got lost in the emotion of being parents again, a kind nurse gently reminded us that it was time for Charles to go home, take a shower, and rest a bit. He nodded, reluctant to leave our side, but knowing he needed a moment to recharge. But before leaving, he promised to bring Harvé, our three-year-old son, to meet his baby sister.

It was already night, and Charles waited for me to take a shower because I didn’t want to leave her with anyone else, so the nurses helped me in the shower, and after I got out, he said goodbye and left, promising that he and Harvé would be here first thing in the morning.

I went to breastfeed her and held Hazel in my arms, admiring every detail of her little face. She was so small and fragile, and she looked just like Charles.

I was almost certain that she would at least resemble me a little bit, but no, she was his spitting image, just like Harvé is.

Even their eye color was the same.

…

When Charles returned the next morning with Harvé, my heart filled with joy at seeing them walk through the door. Harve ran up to me, his eyes shining with excitement.

“Mommy! I came to meet Hazel!” he said, trying to climb onto the bed, and Charles lifted him and put him there.

“Be careful buddy. Don’t hug mommy too hard.” He agrees and lies down next to me and hugs me.

I hugged him affectionately, feeling tears welling up in my eyes again.

“She’s here, Harvé. Do you want to meet her?”

He nodded eagerly, his curious eyes fixed on little Hazel in my arms. Charles approached, smiling proudly.

“Harvé, this is your little sister, Hazel.”

he said, holding Harve in his lap so he could see better. “And Hazel, this is your big brother Harvé.”

Harvé looked at Hazel with admiration, his expression softening as he looked at her little face.

“She’s so tiny, daddy.” he observed, gently touching Hazel’s hand. “Does she knows I have Grand-père name?”

“You can tell her later when se wakes up.” He nodded.

I smiled, watching the instant bond forming between them.

“Do you want to hold her, Harvé?” I asked, carefully offering Hazel to him.

He nodded enthusiastically, his eyes shining with excitement. Carefully, he held Hazel in his arms, his expression one of pure happiness. I obviously supported her weight, she was just lying in his arms.

“Hello, Hazel.” he said softly, stroking her face with his finger. “I’m your big brother, Harvé. I’ll always protect you.”

My heart melted at Harvé’s kind words. He was so sweet and gentle, so ready to love his little sister from the moment we told him I was pregnant. I knew they would have a special bond that would last forever.

As he held Hazel carefully, he suddenly remembered something and asked to get off the bed and ran out of the room. He returned shortly after, holding a small stuffed animal in his hands.

“I brought this for you, Hazel.” he said, handing the stuffed animal that Carlos gave him when he was born and he’s giving to his little sister. “It’s my favorite bear, uncle Carlos gave it to me. I hope you like it as much as I do.”

I smiled, touched by the look of pure happiness in Harvé’s eyes as he gifted Hazel.

“Oh sweetheart, thank you so much and I’m sure she’ll love it.” I said, holding his hand gratefully. “And Is also gonna help her sleep like it did to you.”

Harvé smiled widely, his eyes shining with joy.

“I love you, mommy. I love you, daddy. I love you, Hazel.” he said, looking at each of us with love and tenderness.

We hugged him affectionately, feeling the love and gratitude flooding our hearts. I knew that from that moment on, our family would be united forever, facing life’s challenges together and celebrating its joys.

As I watched Charles hold Hazel in his arms, Harvé beside him with his stuffed bear, I felt complete. The journey to this point had been long and challenging, but now, with our little family by my side, I knew it had all been worth it. And as I held Charles’s hand and watched our children together, I knew I couldn’t ask for anything more in life.

Bonus scene!

Y/nleclerc instagram post

Liked by @charlesleclerc, @maxverstappen, @yourmom and others 293729

Y/nleclerc These past few months have been an emotional rollercoaster, Charles and I welcomed our daughter into the world and we couldn't be happier. Thank you to all our friends, family, and even fans who have given us so much support during this time.

Charles, myself, Harvé and little Hazel are incredibly grateful for everything.

[buddie-buddie]

Buck wakes with a strangled gasp, visions of the scenes he’d just seen in his fitful sleep still vivid and chilling as they flash behind his tear-filled eyes. 

His breath comes in ragged, uneven gasps as he blinks his way into consciousness and tries to shake off the nightmare that still has its claws sunk deep into his racing heart.

“Shh.” There’s a warm, familiar voice in his ear, thick and heavy with sleep. Everything settles. Buck’s breath comes a little easier, the rapid rise and fall of his chest evening out as he registers the warm, grounding weight of Tommy’s arms around him.  

When he was a kid, his nightmares looked a little different. Instead of 100-foot waves and snipers in broad daylight, he used to see monsters and ghosts. When he was older, he had a recurring nightmare of a man who looked a lot like Doug dragging his sister away kicking and screaming. He used to slip out of his bed and shuffle down the carpeted hallway to Maddie’s room, where she’d wake up to the creak of the door and the triangle of light bleeding into the dark room and say, “Evan? What is it?” 

He’d sit on the side of her bed and she’d take his hand in hers and ask him what he wanted to dream of instead. He’d say riding our bikes or the ice cream truck or building sand castles at the beach and Maddie would fold his still-shaky fingers down to lock the good dream in and she’d ruffle his hair and send him back to bed feeling lighter and safer and loved. 

It’s different now, but somehow still the same. 

He still drifts back to sleep feeling calm and safe and grounded. Only instead of Maddie tucking good dreams into the palm of his clammy hand, he has Tommy pressing kisses into his hair and whispering promises against the shell of his ear. It’s different, but it’s good. 

It’s so fucking good.

It’s good even now, as Buck’s breath catches on a shaky inhale, a tiny whimper slipping past his lips.

Even if he tried, he couldn’t find the words to explain the sick and twisted things he just saw in his dreams, nor could he get them out past the lump in his throat. But he doesn’t try and Tommy doesn't expect him to, doesn’t ask him to relive the worst moments of his life for the second time in one night. Buck’s already made the introductions between Tommy and the ghosts still so intent on haunting him.

Tommy knows that on the nights they come back around, Buck would rather be held. He would rather be reminded that he’s here and he’s alive and that it all didn’t end on the pier that day, beneath the ladder truck that night. That his heart started to beat again in the eighteenth second of the third minute, that he came back. And that he’s not alone. 

Tommy shushes him again, warm and reassuring. “S’okay, baby.” 

His arms tighten around Buck’s waist, pulling him back against his chest with a sleepy, contented hum. He mumbles something into the side of Buck’s neck that Buck can’t quite make out, yet understands perfectly when followed by the gentle, almost reverent press of Tommy’s lips to the side of his jaw. 

Hot tears prick at the backs of Buck’s eyes, and he’s not sure if they’re a product of the nightmare or the fact that, even in his sleep, Tommy shows up for him. 

Tommy always shows up for him. Physically, sure– Buck will never forget the sight of him all but tearing through the hospital doors, sooty and sweaty and smiling, despite the bone-deep ache that comes from sixteen hours on the scene of a fire. But emotionally, too. 

He’s levity when Buck needs it and sincerity when he doesn’t. He’s generous with his affection and even more so with his praise. He’s a steady, grounding force, an anchor in the sand when Buck starts to feel unmoored, when the waves get too high and it all gets to be just a bit too much. He’s patient and charming and kind and he’s such a nerd. And he’s aware and attentive in ways that still make Buck’s heart swell and his chest ache. 

It’s like he has a sixth sense, how he’s so tuned into Buck, how he always seems to know what it is Buck wants, what it is Buck needs. He knows just what to say, just what to do. Even now, half asleep. Tommy shows up for him. Always. In all ways. And Buck could cry about it. 

No, scratch that. 

Buck will cry about it. He tries blinking the tears back, but it’s no use. They’re heavy and hot as they roll down his cheeks. Tommy’s voice is still deep and gravelly, thick with sleep as he holds Buck close and murmurs, “I got you.”

He hasn’t said it yet, but Buck knows. He knows. He feels it deep in the marrow of his bones and in the warmest corners of his soul. He hasn’t said it yet, but he will. 

Buck can hear it in the silence that settles over them just before they drift off to sleep, tangled up in each other’s arms. He can feel it in the moments between slow, steady heartbeats as they move around Tommy’s tiny kitchen, cooking breakfast and swapping coffee-laced kisses and stories from their shifts. He can see it in the warmth of Tommy’s smile and the fondness in his eyes any time he walks into a room. He can feel it in the reverence with which Tommy touches him, the way he says his name like a prayer and a promise all at once. 

Which is why, just as much as he knows that he loves Tommy, Buck knows that when he does say it, Tommy will say it back. 

also on ao3

[desi2go]

Importance

pairings: dad!Chan x mom!reader

warnings: angst, fluff

summary: Having a child with an idol isn't easy...

author's note: I'm sorry that I couldn't post anything the last two weeks. But here I am with a new one!

Marriage wasn't easy. Especially when your beloved husband was an idol. The Bang Chan, leader of Stray Kids.

Between tours and busy schedules, there was little time for your relationship. But even though it was hard and you missed him like hell when he was gone for a long time, you still didn't regret to come to your best friend Changbin's party years ago. There, you had met him.

Well, he didn't see you and accidentally poured his drink over you. When your eyes met, he was fascinated by your breathtaking beauty. Maybe it was destiny back then. It felt surreal, like he was your soulmate. The missing piece in in your heart and life.

Apologetic, he bought you a drink and after a wonderful night together, asked for your number.

Soon, he took you out on a date and there followed a second and a third, becoming a huge part in your life.

Without noticing, time passed and Chan proposed to you.

You immediately said yes and became Mrs. Bang.

The second you were married, your family asked when you both would begin to try for a baby but Chan and you wanted to wait some time before thinking about an addition to your family.

You still were young and Stray kids took much time and you understood that. Your job was also one of your top priorities and wanted to earn more money.

But it seemed that the universe had other plans with you two. Seven months after the wedding you started feeling sick. At first you brushed it off and thought that it is just a stomach bug or the stress due to work.

As the lovely but overly concerned husband that he is, Chan took you too a doctor to get a check up. Even though you found it a little bit overdramatic, he still insisted and the reason why you felt nauseous was soon found. You were indeed pregnant and already two months into pregnancy.

Sure, it wasn't planned but you and Chan felt excited to have a small addition to the family. And sooner or later it would have happend anyways.

Chan promised that when the pregnancy was farther along, he would take some time off and help you. You agreed to that and decided to work some more months too before you need to go into maternity leave.

The months passed fast and soon, you welcomed your newest family member. A girl. A sweet girl with already some black locks on her head and the same brown eyes that you fell in love with.

Chan was over the moon. Even though during labour, he was terrified. Would he be a good dad? But all these thoughts washed away when he saw the beautiful angel you both had created with your undying love.

He was the first one to hold her as her crying filled the room. Exhausted, you observed the picture in front of you. Your husband with his precious daughter that already looked like a smaller copy of him.

He was told to undress his shirt and to lay the little bundle of joy against his bare chest to help her breath and keeping her warmth while the doctor checked on you because you had lost a lot of blood during birth.

The first weeks were exhausting. Your little girl, Nari, held both of you awake most of the night. Yourself needed to heal and time to recover from the labor, so you relied mostly on your husband who took such good care for his girl. Fortunately, he got some weeks off to settle into parenthood before going back to the boys even though they nearly saw each other every day.

Since you got home from the hospital, four days after birth, they visited you to meet their 'little sister' as they called Nari. Oh lord, they were so smitten. The only one that seems not so sure about that little human was Seungmin but when he thought that nobody would watch, you catched him drawing circles over Nari's hands, smiling when she wrapped her hand around one of his fingers.

When Chan went back, the house was suddenly so empty. After weeks of being together 24/7, the sudden quiet was unfamiliar. In the mornings, Chan was already out, you loved to lay on the couch, your daughter on your chest, snuggling close to you while sleeping.

When Chan came back home in the evening, he greeted you with a kiss and immediately ran off to his daughter to tell her about his day even though she was already sleeping. You loved to observe him while cooking. You loved this little family. It was something that you ever wanted.

You really loved Nari. But after the pregnancy and early motherhood, you needed some space for yourself. You would love to spend an evening with your girls. Just making yourself look pretty and have fun without watching over a child.

Especially since you almost never leave the house except for some stroller walks and buying errands.

You asked your husband if he comes home some hours earlier so that you could enjoy your night. Immediately, he agreed and you were so grateful that he understood you.

On that day, you took your time with getting ready while your daughter slept. You hoped that Chan would be home soon so that you would be on time since you hated being late.

Minutes passed as you sat on the couch waiting for him. Minutes turned into half an hour and you wrote your girls that you would run a little late today. They were understanding.

More minutes passed and you waited already for a whole hour. You tried to call him since he was always so focused on his work so that he sometimes forgets the time.

He didn't pick up and you were already half an hour late. Your girls were already seated in your restaurant, waiting for you to show up so that they could start ordering food.

Sighing, you texted then that you couldn't make it and they shouldn't wait up on you. Frustrated, you cleared your face from the make up that was hours worth of work.

You took off the new dress that you had bought. You were so excited to wear it because it made you feel so pretty again after the pregnancy made you look bloated and your belly was still not the same then before.

You didn't know if you felt rage, sadness or disappointment that you needed to stay home because of your husband.

It wouldn't be so bad if it was the first time after he got back to work. He used to come back at a normal time to have some time with you and the baby. But as the weeks passed, he stayed later and got up earlier so that you saw him just for some minutes per day.

It was like you were all on your own here in your home. You knew from the beginning that Stray kids was really important to him but after entering parenthood you had hoped that he wouldn't stay till past midnight in the company.

You heard the key unlocking the front door and your husband finally decided to come home after he had promised you that he would be here three hours ago. He greeted you with a small peck on the forehead as you waited for him in the living room.

He looked so calm while dropping his bag to the ground and sitting down on the couch.

"Why are you standing there honey?" He asked. You crossed your arms. He didn't even remembered that this was supposed to be your night out.

"Why are you so late?" You tried to remain calm since your daughter slept in the neighbouring room.

"I was working on the newest song for stray kids" he explained.

"Oh really? Because you said you would be here hours ago" you didn't want to pick a fight. You hated fighting with him. It made your heart clench but this night was important to you.

"I'm sorry honey. But I needed to get it done"

"Well, I had plans for the night, Chan."

"Really? I'm sorry honey. I forgot and this song was important"

"The song was important? My reservation with the girls was important to me" you said and couldn't hold the calm tone that you wanted.

"I already said I'm sorry, Y/n. I got caught up in work" He grew annoyed.

"Like always. You're always so late that I wonder if you even remember that you have a family at home" You knew you were mean and unfair but all these things were twirling around your head for days.

"Of course I remember! I'm sorry that I make money for us" he exclaimed sarcastically. His voice loud, nearly shouting.

These words hurt you. He knew damn well that you aren't dependent on his money and that you make good money as well. Even though you currently took a maternity leave.

"Fuck you, Chan. You aren't the only one working. I was asking you for just one thing. Just being home a little earlier so that I could have some time for myself." You said loudly, your voice cracking in the middle as some tears stung in your eyes.

"Y/n. I-" he tried but you stopped him.

"Nari is your child too. Currently, I'm the only one she sees whether it's in the morning or in the evening. And I'm tired. Tired of being the only one raising her."

You heard cries from the other room. You must have woken up your sleeping daughter. Sighing, you excited the room and headed to Nari without waiting for an answer.

Chan knew that he went too far and that he was more away than home. And it pained him to not spend so much time with his daughter. Slowly he followed you to your daughter's room.

It was dimly lit and you sat in the rocking chair next to her crib with Nari in your arms, rocking her. He hated seeing her in distress and guilt crept up. He was a terrible father and an even more terrible husband.

You felt Chan's hot gaze on you. You knew that the guilt ate him alive right now. He couldn't fool you. Therefore you knew him too well.

After placing Nari back into her crib, giving her a light kiss on her soft skin that smelled so sweet like a baby. Your baby.

Then, you took Chan's hand and lead you outside to the kitchen, farther away from your daughter.

He just followed you, deep in thoughts.

"Y/n, I'm so sorry. I should have come early. And I know that parenting a child alone is difficult. I didn't want to lash out on you like that. I know that the meeting with your friends was important to you" he said and caressed your hand.

"I'm sorry too. It's obvious that you try to be around Nari as long and often as you can."

"No, you were right. I need to be here more. Especially with you both. I shouldn't let work take over so much" he said and pulled you into his arms.

His arms circled around your waist while yours travelled upwards into his fluffy locks. Exhausted he let his head fall on your shoulder, all the tension leaving his body.

"I love you Chan" you whispered.

"I love you too. You and Nari are the most important things in my life"

[daisyblog]

Angel Baby

Too Young Masterlist Summary: Louis and YN welcome their second baby, and Arthur becomes a big brother.

warning: childbirth, labour, birth, hospital

9th of September 2024

If Louis was glad he made any decision in life, he was thankful that he decided to come straight home from the festival in Munich. He had managed to sleep for a little bit on the flight home but he couldn’t wait to get into bed next to YN and wake up with Arthur in the morning.

Spotting Harry’s car on the driveway wasn’t unusual because he would often stay with YN and Arthur when Louis was away. Opening the front door, Louis was trying to open the door as quietly as possible, not wanting to disturb anyone.

The dim light that was on in the living room caught Louis eye. But what surprised him was YN and Harry wide awake. YN was sat on the birthing ball and Harry on the edge of the sofa.

“Hey! Is everything alright?”. Louis walked further into the room, walking closer to YN as he placed a peck to her forehead, aware Harry was in the room.

“I’m having contractions but worry pants over here”. YN signaled towards Harry with her thumb. “Thinks I’m about to give birth within the next five minutes the way he’s been frantically phoning everyone”.

“M’sorry for being worried about my sister”. Harry joked as he looked to Louis for some back up.

“To be fair love, Harry was only looking after you”. Louis kneeled down in front of YN as she still sat on the large grey ball. “How painful are they?”.

YN knew he was referring to the contractions, as he gently rubbed his hand over her thigh. “They’re manageable at the moment”.

“Well we’ll keep timing them and let the hospital know when you need to go in”. Louis smiled up at YN who shared the same look. “We’re having a baby!”.

---

Within two hours, the contraction had become quite intense. YN felt her tummy tighten as the pain spread from her bump around to her back.

“Birth scares me”. Harry voiced as he watched his sister cling to Louis. Her arms were wrapped around his neck and her head burned into his shoulder as she breathed through the pain.

“Keep breathing through it babe…you’re doing amazing”. Louis rubbed her back and kissed the side of her head.

As the contraction ended YN sat back up straight as she took a rest in between. Knowing another one could hit her at any point. “I’m sure I said that you could give birth this time”.

Louis chuckled as he remembered the conversation during Arthur’s birth. “You did…but I didn’t think there would be a next time then…and also I don’t have the right body parts”.

“I forgot how painful this was”. YN held onto Louis’ hand as she prepared for the next one.

---

“I can’t do this…I can’t do this”. YN repeated as she sat on the edge of the sofa, Harry now being the victim of the famous hand squeeze.

“You can…you did it once and you’re going to make Arthur so proud when he finds out you’ve given him everything he’s ever wanted”. Harry encouraged, knowing mentioning Arthur would help.

“I can feel another one”. YN tensed up as she anticipated the pain. Her eyes closed tight as she dreamed about when she would have gas and air at the hospital.

Louis appeared with a bottle of water just in time as he cringed at how tight YN was squeezing her brothers hand.

---

Harry stayed at the house to look after Arthur, whilst YN and Louis were at the hospital. Anne was on her way but this was the downside of living so far away from her Mum.

Like she had done many years ago, YN kept the gas and air nozzle securely in her hand sucking on it probably more than she needed to.

“Do you have any children already? Or is this your first?”. The midwife asked as she sat in the room wi the couple.

“We have a little boy, Arthur…he’s nine”. Louis couldn’t hide his smile as he spoke about their son, and showed her a quick photo of him.

The midwife’s eyes widened. “Waw! He’s the image of you…perhaps this one will look like Mummy”.

---

YN was laying on the bed, the nozzle still attached to her hand. Louis was moving the hair out of her face as she now had a layer of sweat covering her forehead.

“YN I’m so sorry my darling…but we’re going to have to break your waters because your contraction are starting to slow down”. The midwife’s voice was full of sympathy, knowing how painful it could be.

With the tool in her hand ready, YN held onto Louis tightly. “You’re so strong and I’m so proud of you”.

The pain was something YN hadn’t felt before. “AHHH!”. She cried out in pain as she felt the water burst from her.

“You were amazing darling…keep sucking that gas and air for me”. The midwife gave an encouraging smile.

---

The contraction become more frequent and YN could not keep still as she moved from different positions. If she was not bouncing on the ball, she was sat in the chair next to the bed. If she was not in the birthing pool, she was clinging onto Louis, hoping it would ease the pressure.

As Louis massaged the bottom of YN’s back, getting a sense of deja vu, he felt her tense up more than she had been.

“Babe? You alright?”. He swallowed thickly, as YN froze.

“I think…I think I can feel the baby”. At the words, the midwife shot up from her seat and quickly glanced under YN’s gown.

“Lie down on the bed for me…baby’s head is crowning”. The midwife moved around the room quickly gathering everything she needed.

YN laid down like she was told, her legs up in the correct position, trying to relax as she was about to meet her baby.

---

“Baby’s head is out…and I think in about three to four pushes, you’re going to be cuddling your little baby”. The midwife spoke from her position at the end of the hospital bed.

Louis quickly glanced down and could see his baby’s head. Seeing his babies be born was something he found breathtaking and he was in absolute awe of YN for doing it.

YN found strength within and began to push. She repeated the action over and over. Louis was by her side as he waited for the sound to fill the room.

And the sound of a newborn cry finally filled the room, as tears ran down Louis and YN’s cheeks when the little one was placed on YN’s chest.

“I’m so proud of you…and I love you so much”. Louis left several kisses on YN’s head before the final one on her lips.

“I couldn’t have done it without you…I love you”. YN’s voice was tired but the adrenaline was pumping through her.

“Mummy and Daddy love you little one”. YN gently kissed the newborns head.

---

YN couldn’t decide who was more excited as Arthur, Harry and her Mum walked through the hospital room door.

Arthur ran straight to his Mum, who was laid underneath a blanket. “I’ve missed you my boy”. She wrapped her arms around him.

“I’ve missed you too Mum…I’ve been nagging Uncle Harry to come and see you”. Arthur held onto his mother for longer.

Harry and Anne hugged YN and congratulated her and Louis on the birth of their baby. The room was full of happiness and smiles as they looked at the little baby in Louis’ arms.

“Hey lad…do you want to have your first big brother cuddle?”. Louis felt his heart melt as Arthur eagerly nodded and ran over to his father’s side.

Arthur sat in the chair, waiting for Louis to place the newborn into his arms. The minute Louis placed the baby into Arthur’s hands, the four adults all shared a loving look, and wiped the tears away from their cheeks.

“Hi baby…I’m Arthur, your big brother”. Louis and YN shared a look as they knew this was the right time to share the news.

“And this is Elsie…your little sister”.

---

ynstyles and louist91

liked by lottietomlinson, annetwist and 1,672,665 others

ynstyles Our babies🤍Welcome to the world Elsie Johannah Tomlinson🩷 View all 10,733 comments

lottietomlinson Our sweet Arthur and Elsie🥹🤍

annetwist My heart could burst❤️I’m one lucky Nanny🩵🩷🩷 ⌞ynstyles The absolute best🥰❤️

the.daisytomlinson I love being an auntie to all these babies❤️

thephoebetomlinson my beautiful nephew and niece🩵🩷Auntie Phee loves you lots xx

gemmastyles We are so lucky❤️Aunties little cuties xx

louisfan5 OMG THE BABY IS HERE!!!

louisfan3 Louis a girl dad🩷🩷🩷

harryfan9 Harry is an uncle to another girl🥹💕

Taglist :@jillsvalentinex @itsmytimetoodream @peterholland04 @youcan-nolonger-run @chronicallybubbly @macy-tpwk @wh0s-nadii @lillisummers

[chlorinecake]

NO GUIDANCE | song eunseok oneshot 🧺

▹ PAIRING: softcore boyfriend eunseok x f. reader

▹ SYNOPSIS: Just you enjoying the luxuries of being next door neighbors with your well-endowed boyfie who treats you like a his best friend and a princess at the same time…

▹ WARNINGS: KINKTOBER SPECIAL, swearing, bad humor, kinda fluffy, kissing, SIZE KINK (eunseok is massive), oral (m. receiving), cum play & cum eating, reader has an unnamed little sister, mentions of periods and food, that’s all

▹ WORD COUNT: 2.1k — DAY 6

“Why do you sunbathe in the middle of your front yard like… every single afternoon?” You asked Eunseok upon taking the usual five second walk from your porch to his, only to find him once again in his natural habitat.

“Because,” he begins plainly, already provoking you to roll your eyes at him, “I just find that it always gets your attention…”

Your boyfriend was a strange man, and perhaps that’s what truly captivated you about him…

Slowly, the tall and lanky boy peeled his round eyes open to meet your frame, thankful in his heart for your figure blocking the afternoon sunlight from partially blinding him—

“Why do you carry that children’s book around with you everywhere you go?” Eunseok shot back similarly to your previous offense, and you find yourself taken aback by his question.

Touché, you think to yourself, and a cloud luckily moves in front of the sun now, stopping its bright days from overheating your back.

“I’m actually doing a school project for my little sister,” you started, and he quirked a shocked brow at you as you continued, “she’s still in the hospital, so I figured this I’d the least I could do to help her stay ahead in class …”

“Oh, that’s sweet then… well, not the hospital part, but—”

“I get what you mean,” you giggle in response before joining the space beside him in the grass, “thanks, anyway, though…”

“Don’t mention it,” he yawns briefly while out-stretching his long limbs on the pasture, turning his head to face you with a seemingly plain expression aside from the gentle look in his eyes. “How’s she doing, ____?… Honestly?…”

Your boyfriend’s question makes you fall silent for a moment, but only because you never even thought about the answer to that yourself.

Your sister had been in treatment for longer than you cared to keep count of by now, but at the very least, shehadn’t lost her smile yet; hopefully, a promising sign…

“She’s okay, Eunseok…” you say softly, and he simply nods in response, hoping in his heart that your answer held some integrity.

His gaze leaves your face now as he lets out a relaxed sigh, and without thinking, your index finger starts to trace a line across his hairline.

Then, with a clawed hand, your fingers sink into the threads of his platinum hair, gently scratching at his scalp as if massaging him…

“If you had any clue as to how dirty my hair is right now, you would not be touching me,” Eunseok says, but only as a way to hide his growing smile at the way you gazed down at him… eyes all soft and full of sickening love…

“I’m always touching you, Eunseok,” you say, leaning down to kiss the center of his head, “and it’s not like a little dirt could ever change that…”

Your boyfriend swallowed dryly beneath you, and the moisture that your kiss left on his skin lingers as the focus of his mind for way too long—

“Hey,” you say, and only because he’s getting up on his knees now, flashing you an all-too-telling look while dusting the bits of grass from his clothes, “Eunseok, I literally just sat next to you—”

“And I’m literally already horny,” he interrupts, hair a shaggy mess on his head as he caresses the side of your face before kissing your jaw, “I missed you, darling…”

You gave him a knowing look before asking, “Me or just fucking me?…”

“Hmm,” he hummed in thought, only to shrug his shoulders and say, “A bit of both, I guess…”

Standing up completely now, he takes your hand and guides you to his front door step before twisting the golden knob, “I have something to show inside after this, by the way, so don’t let me forget…”

“Noted,” you say sarcastically, and his hand gives yours one last tug before finally pulling you all the way inside the house, closing the door behind you two.

He leads you past his antique kitchen, through the dining room hallway, and up to the storage room right below the staircase.

“Why not your bedroom?” You ask quietly as he shoves you in the room, joining the dark space before locking the door with a key he held in his back jean pocket.

“Because,” he says, like he always did, already getting started on undoing his belt buckle and zipper, “I haven’t cleaned my room in forever and don’t wanna risk having a rat to run over your foot while you’re sucking my dick or something…”

You chuckle at your boyfriend’s words before swatting his hands from the center of his pants, wanting to take the rest of his bottoms off for him.

“You really require no guidance, huh?” Eunseok remarks with a smirk, somewhat impressed by your general aptness to get his clothes off without him even having to ask or direct you…

“Only when it comes to this,” you return, taking a moment to caress his hardening length over the fabric of his boxers first before finally shimmying them down and out the way.

He appears to be a bit shy now as his cock springs up, dangling just a few centimeters from your pretty face.

Though, you know it’s only because he can see everything… typically, Eunseok preferred to have the lights completely off whenever you two were fooling around, but you had been trying to break that timidness in him for a while…

“You okay?” You ask while kneeling before him, caressing the sides of his tense thighs as if to calm him, but he doesn’t answer immediately.

Instead, he responds by cupping the sides of your face with his hands, and they’re so large that they take up all the space at each side of your skull.

It makes you feel small and dainty, reminding you that your big boyfriend was truly a soft and tender guy at heart.

“Just make sure you take your time so you don’t choke, baby,” he finally says, and your stomach flutters at the way his thumbs smooth over your cheek as if his massive cock isn’t dangling in your face right now.

Your lips waste no time in securing themselves around his tip, and your tongue rests at the underside of his shaft as he slowly pumps your head, twitching in your mouth at the delicious warmth you provided.

His eyes flutter shut once he feels pleasure traveling all the way up into his abdomen as he makes your mouth his personal fuck toy, provoking you to dig your nails into his hips slightly… not because he’s going too hard, but because you want him to look you in the eyes as you take him.

Gurgling sounds fill the room as your vision catches sight of the little veins trailing his toned pelvis, and you swear you feel yourself getting wet just from sucking him…

His body had always been a visual feast for you, especially when his facial features were taken over with a look of lust that complemented his beauty perfectly.

You feel like your hands could go on forever as they keep caressing his thighs, the expanse of his limbs extending farther than your arms could ever reach.

“Fuck baby, you’re taking me so well,” he grunts while thrusting his hips into your face, and it doesn’t take long for his hands to leave the side of your head, noticing how eager you were to take over now.

You release your head with a wet smack, jerking the base of his slimy cock as you know you won’t be able to fit it all into your mouth given how hard he was.

Going back in, you manage to deep throat about half of his length, using your palm to stimulate the rest of it…

He’s leaning back against a shelf as you continue to blow him, and he can’t help but throw his head back at the feeling of his tip hitting the gummy pallet of your throat.

“Mmm,” you hum around his cock, and the vibrations make his hips chase his orgasm desperately, thrusting up into your mouth as a bit of spit drips along his balls now, making him feel all dizzy.

“Ahhh~ just like that, baby… ‘m gonna cum,” he mumbles through a whiny grunt, and you speed up the strokes of your hands and the bobbing of your head until you finally feel it; his creamy load bursting in your mouth as his hips stutter before you, twitching from the intense pleasure.

He’s biting his lip so hard that it makes him wince even more, but only because your soft, glistening lips keep pumping him, and the continuous stimulation makes him feel weak in the knees.

“Baby- fuck… n-not too much,” he groans in a deep voice that rumbles all the way to your mouth, and his eyes look so vulnerable to you, even though he’s looking down from so high…

You finally release your mouth from his pulsating cock, a bit of his cum dribbling down the corner of your mouth that he helps you clean up with the tip of his cock before shoving it back into your mouth.

He mutters a praise under his breath that you don’t quite catch over the sounds of your soppy mouth sucking him dry, his large hand stroking over your head again until eventually pulling you away, and leaning down to kiss you… hard…

The two of your tongues intertwine as he whispers, “you’re too good to me, ____,” against your lips, but it doesn’t last for long as he doesn’t wanna get himself hard all over again.

You stand up to meet him where he stood, and he braces you with a hand to your lower back, knowing that your legs likely felt a bit numb from being on your knees for so long.

“Should I…?” He begins, letting his free hand trail from the center of your breasts and down to your core where he presses on your clothed clit with the pad of his two fingers.

You jump a bit at the feeling, knowing deep down that you’d love to have your boyfriend fuck you to tears with just his fingers, but you had to decline his offer for one, small, inconvenient reason:

Your period—

“Maybe another time, Eunseok,” you smile, standing up on tippy toes to kiss the corner of his lips now, and he somehow knew exactly what was going on with you…

“Yea, in about five more days, I’m guessing,” he returns with a smirk, and you playfully smack his shoulder, following in his steps as he leads you out of the storage room and into the kitchen where you both wash your hands.

Sitting at one of the barstools around the counter, he pours you a glass of your favorite tea before sliding it to you barista-style, and you can’t help but roll your eyes at him… like you always did…

“You told me not to let you forget, so here’s your reminder,” you say plainly, right before taking a sip from the cup, and it’s like a lightbulb goes off in his head at your words.

“Oh right!” He exclaims, walking over to the kitchen pantry before opening it up to pull out a small woven basket tucked into a clear plastic bag with a bow to keep it closed.

You could hardly make out what was inside the basket until he plopped it on the countertop, letting you take a closer look.

“These are for you,” he begins to say, just as your eyes catch sight of the twenty-some candy bars staring back at you—

“This many?” You ask with widened eyes.

“You didn’t let me finish,” he continues, chuckling a bit at your reaction, “but I meant for you and your sister… I know how much you both like chocolate, and I figured it’d be nice to bring you two a little extra joy during this time…”

“Wow… this is really sweet of you, Eunseok, but… the doctor said she’s not allowed to eat sweets while hospitalized—”

“Just make sure she doesn’t get caught with it, then,” your boyfriend interrupts matter-of-factly, making you stare back at him with a knowing expression. “C’mon, it’s not like chocolate put her in a hospital bed to begin with, so relax… just one little piece and she’ll still be fine, ____… alright?” He asks, but it’s more so of a proclamation than a question.

“Alright,” you agree eventually, right before getting up from your seat to give him a proper hug now…

“What’s this for?” He asks, slowly letting himself wrap his arms around you.

“For everything,” you sigh, holding him a little tighter as the sunlight from outside leaked through the kitchen curtains, “anddd because I’m sure you’ll be a bit upset when you find out that I haven’t told her that we’re dating yet…”

⋆♱✮ Thank you to everyone who made it to the end of this fic, concluding DAY 6 of my Kinktober Event !! If you're interested in reading more works like this, feel free to check out my main enhypen masterlist or my kinktober masterlist by clicking one of these links !!

⋆♱✮ PERMANANT TAGLIST:

@squoxle, @nishiimuranights, @ashgonedash

@yourmomscuntis2tighy, @wonbinisbabygurl

@watamotee33, @addictedtohobi, @ot7sevenlvr

⋆♱✮ KINKTOBER TAGLIST:

@pasteltheghost16 @fawnpeaks @melonvrs

@mheretoreadff @skzfelixlove @inishij

@yaorzu-blog @andromedawillburyyou @ramyeonzprincess

@zaihypen @simjaeyunns @gardenwonnies @hynier

@idontknowhowtomakeusernames @enhymeowz @minhosimthings @stormy1408

@crownj1min @jay-0n3s @gacktsa @leeknowinggg

@d-dilemma @mrsjohnnysuh

[circeyoru]

By His Side = Requested

The Request

[Sung Jinwoo x Long-time Partner!Reader]

Quick Note: ◀【 】 ⇒ Messages from Jinwoo 【 】▶ ⇒ Messages from you

【Just got on plane, will be arriving soon.】▶

◀【Ok. Let me know when you land. I’ll be waiting】

◀【Can’t wait to see you】

【Will do. See you then!】▶ 

【Airplane mode now】▶ 

With that, you were cut off from your conversation and placed your phone away since it was going to be useless during the flight. You glanced around you, seeing all the filled seats of the first class seats that would otherwise be impossible for you to acquire. You had to thank all your current enjoyment to your loving partner.

Sung Jinwoo. Now better known as the 10th S-Rank Hunter of Korea. 

You’ve been dating him since your college days and known him since highschool, it was only official between the two of you after both of you were admitted into the same college. The both of you were loving couples and a pair gossiped by others for your long relationship and commitment towards each other.

Jinwoo had already been balancing school and work after his father had disappeared in a gate and was never heard of again. Soon later, he awakened but as an E-Rank, he was advised not to raid since he was still young. His mother was also against it, perhaps some trauma and fear of Jinwoo disappearing through a gate as well, so Jinwoo took part-time jobs to help his mother earn a living. 

Then came the day of the horrifying news. He received a call mid-lecture and luckily, during a break, so he took the call from an unknown number. You were by his side idly scrolling your phone while thinking it was some scam number, but when you glanced over to him, you say all the blood practically drained from his face. You called his name softly, no sooner, the call ended and he turned to you with tears threatened to fall.

Only managing to say, “Mom’s in an Eternal Slumber…”

Without room for talk, you immediately packed yours and his stuff, rushing out of the hall. You had gotten your driver’s license and your car was nearby the campus, so you drove the both of you to the hospital. You didn’t want to wait for the bus or taxi, plus, you wanted to give some space for Jinwoo to calm down. The ride was silent, save for the college friends calling you to ask what happened. You didn’t explain much but said you needed to go and they reassured you that they’ll make notes for you. You know Jinwoo’s phone was buzzing with his friends’ messages, but he didn’t have the room to answer. Understandably.

His sister wasn’t there, probably because she couldn’t be reached, but more likely situation was that Jinwoo was the only one person that was legal enough to take care of this business. You stood by Jinwoo while the doctors explained the situation, you held his hand as a form of reassurance while he maintained his composure and listened. When they left, Jinwoo balled his eyes out, repeatedly saying that it was his fault because he was a Hunter and his mother was constantly exposed to his mana even though it was weak.

There wasn’t any words you could say to deny it, all you could do was stay by his side and comfort him with a tight hug and silent acceptance without any form of judgment. “I’m here. I’m here.”

Jinwoo formly took Hunter classes and briefing sessions to prepare himself to enter gates and raid to earn more money. It was the fastest way since he couldn’t wait for his degree to finish and find a job. Even if he could wait that long, there’s no telling if his mother could. And as much as he was grateful for your help, he couldn’t just ask you for money the entire time. 

So he dropped out of school and became a full fledge Hunter.

Your heart ached everytime he signed up for a raid and went, only to return with barely everything but a body of wounds and exhaustion. Though you knew there was no convincing him to stop because he was determined to do everything in his power to be strong and supporting his loved ones on his own. You didn’t fault him for it and admired it.

Word got around that Jinwoo dropped out and worked as a Hunter, but he was an E-Rank, laughed by other Hunters and labelled as the weakest one. Some rivals of Jinwoo tried bargaining with you to dump him and go for someone more worthy—them basically. You gave them a slap to the face as your answer. 

Somehow it got to Jinwoo’s ears as well. Once, he tried to break up with you and told you to be with someone that could make you happier than him. You saw how fragile and sensitive he was, always have been, even with the carefree smiles and nonchalant chuckles, he knew about his situation more than anyone else. He’s aware of it all but never said anything about it. 

Naturally, you never allowed it and told him he was the only one for you. 

How did you end up in a different country than Jinwoo for so long? You had an exchange programme to attend for work for years, it was a programme you’ve been aiming for a long long while and prepared for it. A programme Jinwoo would have joined with you or tried to join you in some way. With a tearful goodbye, you left for that. 

Periodically, you’d send money back to Jinwoo and his family to show your support and care. Because of the time difference and busy schedules for both sides, conversations were sacre, calls were even rarer, one could compare it like conversation—S-Rank and calls—SSS-Rank, something like that. 

You had noticed there was a long period where Jinwoo’s conversation were cut off. You didn’t know what happened and you couldn’t reach him. Then your messages were read but no reply from him. You were paranoid to the point of asking Jinah—his younger sister—if Jinwoo was alive and well or in the hospital. She told you he was just fine. There was a brief moment where an image was sent then deleted the next before you could see anything. Then Jinah told you not to worry about him. It reminded you a lot of what Jinwoo would say, but there was no reason for him to ignore you, right?

Time passed and something major happened. A new rising S-Rank Hunter in Korea. You paid it no mind at first, until one of your friends showed you who it was. Low and behold, it was Jinwoo looking like a different person and acting different too. 

You told yourself it was just because he was on camera, but there were glimpses of his funny side that reminded you of the times before. You second guessed yourself if he wanted to break up since he found someone better than you. Now that he’s an S-Rank, people would be more fond of him. Not to mention, maybe a strong lady Hunter would be his match too.

Was that the reason for his silence? Why didn’t he tell you? Were you forgotten? Abandoned?

◀【Hey】

◀【Sorry for not contacting you for so long】

His sudden messages caught you off guard, but you found yourself immediately dropping everything to reply to him. Quickly drying your hands and wrapped yourself in your towel, your fingers tapped your keyboard with incredible speed.

【It’s okay! I know you must be busy.】▶

【So what’s up?】▶

Your eyes watched as the [Online] below his name changed to [Typing…], you found your heartbeat quickening. You stared at the screen. Then another message popped up.

◀【I have. It’s been chaotic】

◀【How’s your side? I think your programme’s ending soon, are you coming back to me?】

Coming back to him. Why did that make you skip a beat even though you thought he was ready to give you up? It wasn’t that doubted, okay, maybe you did, but it was your own self-doubt talking you down. You couldn’t keep your mind off of Jinwoo and caught up with any news regarding him, his appearance had changed, same with his attitude. More confidence and indifference that it scared you a bit. It was refreshing to see others relying on his favour than the other way around. You were proud of him. If anyone were to deserve such a change, it was definitely be him.

【Yeah! Totally! Where else would I do?】▶ 

【Go. I mean.】▶ 

◀【I think both scenarios apply. I was scared you’d want to stay where you are】

You hummed a little, a soft smile appearing on your face. You patted yourself down a bit more while your eyes were still glued to your screen so you didn’t miss Jinwoo’s messages. When you were relatively dry, you exited the bathroom and went to your bedroom to turn on the laptop, searching up for plane tickets of the earliest dates after your programme closing ceremony.

【I’ll try to find some cheap plane tickets and earliest ones to come back】▶ 

You didn’t even have time to share the websites you found before Jinwoo’s message popped up.

◀【Just give me your city location and I’ll handle the rest. I’ll get your ticket and anything else you want】

◀【Name whatever】

【Hey! Just because you’re an S-Rank now, doesn’t mean you can boss me around!】▶ 

◀【Ah…】

◀【You heard already? I thought it could be a surprise when you get back】

【Kinda hard not to. You’re all over the news. The fight with Thomas Andre?】▶ 

◀【You saw that too?】

【...】▶ 

【Are you serious…】▶ 

The conversation was unending until Jinwoo noticed the time on your end and forced you to stop chatting so you could rest. You didn’t want the conversation to end, you thought it’d be a one-time thing since it’s been so long that the two of you chatted like this. As if reading your mind, Jinwoo promised you that he’ll chat with you more often now.

Your eyes closed, figuring a good nap would be a great way to make time pass quicker so that you could see Jinwoo. Little did you know, your flight was the safest one there is with all the Shadows that have infiltrated the plane to ensure your safe return. Kaisel was even flying over the plane undetected in case anything happened. All while Jinwoo and his family waited for your return.

At the message of your plane’s landing from you, but his Shadows had already notified Jinwoo the moment Korea was in sight. You were approached by some airport staff worker that offered you a ride to the arrival checkpoint, you were about to decline until he mentioned it was a request from someone special to you. So you accepted.

While you had your documents checked for entry, there was hardly any issue, by that, you meant the waiting line was nonexistent even though the plane you boarded was full of people. Perhaps it was because of the ride you were given, but there had to be other people… Right??? There were special lines you were directed to and served with the best hospitality that you questioned if you were in a fever dream.

As you came closer to the public space of the arrival gate, you heard the buzz happening around. You wondered if a celebrity was in the airport. You needed to avoid those area so you could meet up with Jinwoo as quick as possible!

You tightened the coat around you and tightened your hold around your suitcase handle, prepared to dash out of the crowd. However, the moment you exited the threshold, you were greeted with red carpet and two rolls of figured in black and purple highlights. The knight figures all bowed and raised their swords over their head, like a royal procession was about to happen. At the end of the red carpet was your beloved Jinwoo with a bouquet of flowers.

JINWOO IS THE CELEBRITY!!!! HOW COULD I FORGET THAT!!?!?!?!?!?!???!!!

As touching and awe-inspiring as this all was, you were not one for attention. You took quick strads towards Jinwoo and stopped in front of him, already feeling the stares and cameras pointed at your direction. 

“Welcome back. My love.” Jinwoo spoke so lovingly that your body felt like it was melting if not for the public attention you’re receiving. Though, Jinwoo seemed to be used to it.

“I’m back.” You managed a forced smile, but your nervousness preveiled and you voiced out, “But can we move somewhere more private? Away from so many eyes?”

Jinwoo caught on and wrapped his arms around you, pushing your face into his chest after handing the nearst Shadow the flowers. As you were comforted, Jinwoo gave all those around him a warning glare and his Shadows helped in shooing away any nosy people. 

You peeked up to see what Jinwoo was doing, seeing him colder and more authoritative in the flesh brought a smile to your face. He’s changed, but is still the same caring boy you fell for all those years ago. You hugged back while his Shadows cleared up the mess welcome show he set up for you to make the experience everlasting in your memories. 

“I’m finally back by your side again.”

Note: This is a recent request, it's only cause the previous ones turned out to be yandere ones so I'm gapping them out. I think there'll be 2 stories a month from now on. Unless I got more motivation and time to write then more or less.

Circe Y.

My Works: MASTERLIST

Taglist: (none at the moment)

[lovecla]

IF YOU LOVE ME, LET ME KNOW | jack hughes.

epilogue:

how soph got her inspiration to write ‘juno’

<last chapter>

➴ warnings: smut (unprotected sex, breeding kink, cock warming, aftercare, creampie, p in v, slightly degradation.), mentions of dad!jack and mom!reader, mentions of ovulation, domestic soph and jack.

➴ word count: 2.9k

➴ author’s note: inspired by ‘juno’ by queen sabrina and also by the videos of jack with kids on my fyp. i am sorry for being a whore but also, not really. enjoy! ♡

BEING a mom wasn’t something that you thought you wanted.

You’d always say that, ever since you were a little girl, when your sisters talked about how they wanted to marry a nice guy and have two point five kids— all girls— and name them after Disney princesses. You’d just stare at them weirdly and go back to pretend you were doing some interview for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno.

And Jack shared the same opinion— you knew that he wanted kids but it wasn’t a priority on his list. He never really mentioned them, not like Quinn, who was always talking about how he wanted to be a great father, just like Jim is.

But the thing is, you never really cared about being a mom, or making Jack a father for that matter, until you saw how Jack acted around kids.

First, it’d been with your nieces, Aurora and Jasmine. Back in 2023, you’d invited your mom, your stepdad, your sisters and their families to spend the New Years with you and Jack’s family. It was a huge mess, the house was packed with people but you were so happy to watch your favorite people— the Hughes and the Montenegro— get along with each other that the lack of space wasn’t an issue at all.

Then, you introduced your nieces to Jack.

“My babies,” you smiled, picking the four-year-old up, noticing how big she’d gotten since the last time you saw her. “This is Auntie’s boyfriend, his name’s Jack. Can you say hi?”

Aurora looked at Jack with big, bright eyes, and you could tell she was enchanted with his warm smile and blue eyes.

Jasmine stood behind your legs, the seven-year-old also staring at him with curious eyes.

“Hi, uncle Jack,” Jasmine whispered, holding your leg tighter. You gasped, not expecting her to call Jack ‘uncle’ so soon. He also looked surprised, but just for a second, before he went down on one knee and offered the little girl his hand.

“Hey, honey,” he replied back, shaking hands with the seven-year-old. “Nice to meet you and your sister.”

Aurora was looking down, the pacifier in her mouth moving around, until she finally decided Jack was worthy of her attention, moving her body towards the floor, signaling that she wanted to be down there with him.

You chuckled, sitting on the floor with them, watching as Aurora crawled her way to Jack’s lap, offering him her Maleficent plush she carried around everywhere.

“Oh, you want me to hold this?” He asked, voice gentle and funny. He picked her up and held the toy with his other hand, still smiling. “Thank you, Imma keep it safe. Jasmine, you wanna share your toys with me too?”

Jasmine ended up rambling about how she was too big for toys and that now she was only interested in singing like her auntie, which made you laugh and confess that you played with Barbies until you were twelve.

Jasmine and Aurora absolutely loved Jack. And you could see that he loved them right back, with how much attention he gave them, playing with them the entire night and answering all of their— mostly Jasmine’s— noisy questions. And when you were sitting on the couch, talking with Ellen and your mom, you watched with heart eyes as he leaned against the wall, talking to Quinn and Luke while holding a sleeping Aurora in his arms, gently rocking her back and forth, while covering her with her blanket.

After that night, you started noticing how he acted around kids. Either when he went to hospitals to visit the sick children who rooted for the Devils, or when he went with you to your concerts and interacted with the few kids there.

The way he picked them up, answered their questions, held their hands— it definitely did something to you. Not only to your brain, but to your entire body. You could always be sneaky and blame your ovulation for being a whore, but truth be said: the idea of Jack getting you pregnant was hot, even if it wasn’t something you wanted right now.

You were sitting on Quinn’s couch, watching as Jack held one of his cousins in his arms and talked to a man who was probably one of his uncles.

He looked so fucking good. His hair was a bit shorter, and he was getting bigger now, probably due to the fact that he spent too much time at the gym with Luke.

You were trying to continue the conversation with Ellen, answering her questions about your music and fans, but it was extremely hard. Jack being only a few feet away from you didn’t help, at all.

“Are you feeling okay, Soph dear?” Ellen put her hands on your knees, squeezing them slightly.

You turned your head back and smiled, deciding to tell her a half-truth. “Just a little tired and jet lagged, that’s all. Don’t worry, ma’am.”

She laughed, as she always did whenever you called her that.

“Do you want to take a nap in Quinny's room? He won’t mind.”

You felt bad because now your mother-in-law thought you weren’t feeling well but the full truth was you were just very much horny and wanting her son to fuck you.

“There’s no need for that, I’ll just wait until Jackie is ready to head back,” you nodded, looking at Jack again, who was now trying to put the baby to sleep— and failing miserably, since all the kid wanted was to remove his cap from his head.

“I’m going to talk to Jack so you both go home, okay?” She replied and before you could even stop her, she got up and walked towards Jack.

You watched as she picked the baby out of Jack’s hand and said something to him, while pointing back at you. Jack turned his head to the side and looked right back at you, and you could see that he was starting to get worried.

He nodded at something that she said, and quickly kissed her on the cheek, walking back at you.

“Hey, baby,” he greeted, holding your hand and gently pulling you closer. “Mom said you weren’t feeling well. Why didn’t you tell me, Soph?���

“I’m fine, I just—” what would you even say? Hey, I’m horny and I need you to fuck me? “Hum. I can wait until you’re ready to go.”

“Nah, let’s go now.”

You barely recall the time between saying goodbye to everyone, getting in the car and heading back to Jack’s place. You spent the entire time trying to stop the wetness between your thighs and praying that it wouldn’t stain Jack’s car seat, squirming around.

“What’s the matter with you, baby?” He chuckled, placing his hand on your thigh, squeezing it lightly.

You didn’t answer, just tried to keep your mind in pink unicorns and old grandmas. No horny thoughts allowed until you were both at home.

Which, thankfully, didn’t take long. Jake parked inside of his garage, and you got out of the car like your ass was on fire.

“Sophia!” You heard him yell at you, before you opened the front door with your keys.

You didn’t make it too far, he grabbed you by your waist when you were making your way to his bedroom. “Soph, what is wrong with you today, baby?”

You whined, not sure of what to say. “Jack?”

“Yeah, baby?”

You stand on the tip of your toes and kiss him, your tongue fighting for space inside his mouth. He kissed you back just as ferociously, his grip on your waist becoming harder.

“‘Want you to knock me up,” you mumbled against his lips, watching as his blue eyes stared down at you, full of lust. “N-not really, but… please?”

He smirked. “You wanted to leave my brother’s house because you wanted me to knock you up?”

Well, when he put it like that…

“What a fucking slut, baby,” Jack whispered, gripping your ass with his right hand. “Just because you wanted me to make you carry my children?”

“Jack.” You moaned, holding onto his hoodie for dear life.

“You want me to make you a mommy, Soph?” Instead of letting you answer, he kissed you again, picking you up and walking with you, without breaking the kiss.

He managed to get you both in his room, and placed you on his bed, quickly taking his clothes off— the hoodie, the jeans, the shirt and then the boxers. His dick stood there hard and thick, the tip so red it was almost purple, leaking pre-cum.

You actually moaned just with the sight of it. The need of Jack’s cock inside of you, in and out, putting you in the right place, made you sweat.

You took off your own hoodie and your own shirt, thanking God for the past-you who chose not to wear a bra that day. Your nipples were hard and sensitive, just like they always are during ovulation week, that just the cold breeze inside the bedroom made you shiver.

You removed your jeans and stared at your situation, feeling disgusting and extremely horny at the same time— your panties were so wet that they were completely see through now, the thin layer of fabric doing nothing to cover your pussy.

“Jack,” you moaned again, feeling frustrated. “‘Need you.”

“I can see that, baby,” he smirked, towering your body with his. “I’ll take care of you, mhm?”

You nodded, kissing him one more time because you couldn’t get enough of his lips.

He removed your panties and threw them somewhere, the sound of something wet crushing against the floor filling up the room, making you cringe. Ovulation sucks.

He broke the kiss, moving on to your tits, sucking and biting and groping them, which didn’t help with the problem between your legs.

Jack finally let go, positioning himself so that he could be inside you in a quick, swift move. You moaned, feeling finally full and satisfied.

“Fuck, Soph, you’re so fucking wet, baby,” he breathed in your ear as he pounded inside you, as if you couldn’t hear the pornographic sounds whenever he sank deeper inside you. “All of this just because you wanted my kids? You could’ve just asked, uh, y’know?”

You wanted to reply so bad, tell him that it was just your post-period brain being absurd and crazy, but you had already reached that place inside your head you craved so much, the silence, the calmness— every thought being shoved inside a drawer and the only thing on your head was how Jack reached deep inside you, and how you could feel him in your belly, and how much you loved him and how you wanted to be the mother of his children so badly.

The saltiness of your tears inside your mouth made you realize that you were fully crying, as you often did whenever Jack took you to the right place. All you wanted to do was let him take care of you, and hand your life to him on a silver platter.

“Does it feel good, baby?” He sucked on your right nipple, fucking you so hard the mattress was moving. “Knowing that you’re gonna be a mommy? Carry my children and have my last name?”

You nodded even though you wanted to speak, but your tongue felt glued to the roof of your mouth and your mind was busy conjuring images of Jack holding babies who looked like the perfect mix between the two of you, and being the greatest dad ever and you wanted that so, so much.

“Can’t even speak, fuck, baby,” He mocked you, rubbing your clit furiously, making you scream and try to close your thighs— no success, since Jack’s body made it impossible. “None of that, Soph.”

You knew you probably looked like a mess; hair tangled, face wet with tears and probably spit too, tits marked and with his handprints on them, but it didn’t matter. All you wanted was JackJackJack.

You came with an obnoxiously loud scream, legs trembling and eyes rolled to the back of your head, while Jack still rubbed your sensitive, swollen clit and slammed his cock inside you.

You clutched the sheets like your life depended on it, head going side to side, eyes closed the entire time, until you felt the familiar sensation of Jack’s come deep inside you.

“Good God, Soph,” Jack sounded out of breath. “Fuck.”

You still didn’t feel ready to speak, the tears still rolling down your face, so you just waited until he moved around, laying down and bringing you with him, his dick softening inside of you, something he knew you liked to have after sex.

He kissed your forehead and put the duvet on top of both of you, as you slowly came back to life, listening to his heartbeat and counting your own breaths.

“I love you,” you mumbled, wanting nothing more than a nap.

He chuckled, before kissing your forehead again. “I love you too. D’you think we’re going to be parents now?” He joked, and you smacked his chest, lightly.

“Don’t be silly.”

He just hummed, deciding to leave you alone (for now) and removing himself from you instead. You winced, feeling his cum coming out of you, as you clenched around nothing.

Jack then picked you up, and walked with you to the bathroom, making sure that you peed before showering. He left the bathroom for no more than a minute, just to give you some privacy— he knew that even after all this time, you were still embarrassed to pee in front of him— and came back with your favorite pajamas: cotton panties and an old NJ Devils shirt.

You smiled, seeing his name and number plastered on the back of the shirt, remembering the night you first met, and how pissy he was because you were wearing Nico’s jersey.

It feels like a lifetime ago.

“Ready, baby?” He asked, blue eyes staring so deep into your soul that you had no option but to agree with everything he said.

He gently held your hand, guiding you until you were standing inside the big shower stall, the warm water untying all the knots in your body.

You leaned against his body, both of you under the water now, humming as he cleaned you, with your favorite vanilla scented body wash— which he secretly loved more than you.

His hands work slowly and gently, spreading the soap on all of your body, and you just stand there, accepting it and hiding your face as you feel his fingers entering you again, removing his release.

You should be used to it by now but it was still a foreign feeling, being so well taken care of sometimes still scared you, but Jack was nothing but patient.

You watched as he cleaned his own body, not using even half of the gentleness he used with you, which made you smile. If you weren’t so tired, you’d offer your help, but right now all you wanted was to sleep beside him.

He turned the water off and got out of the shower first, wrapping a towel around his hips. He smiled at you and picked up another towel, drying your body with it.

He didn’t wash your hair so no need for hair dryers, thankfully, so you just slipped into your custom made pajamas and waited until he got himself dressed as well— a Calvin Klein underwear— before you both washed your teeth and got out of the bathroom.

You sat on the bed, trying your hardest not to smile, not wanting to look crazy. But you were happy. So, so happy, you were probably writing about this later.

“Here, pretty,” he handed you a bottle of water, already opened. “Drink this for me and we're ready to go to sleep.”

You thanked him softly before practically chugging the water bottle and placing it on your nightstand.

Jack smiled and gave you a peck, before sliding into the bed with you, pulling you close, as he always did. He wasn’t much of a snuggle guy, but he knew how much you liked them, so he just followed the lead.

After a few minutes in silence, you turned around so you could face those sapphire eyes you loved so dearly. “I am on birth control,” you whispered, feeling a little bit embarrassed. “Just so you know.”

He smiled, chuckling. “I know that, baby. I was just giving you something you needed.”

You nodded, not sure if you should feel content or not. Did that mean Jack doesn’t want you to be the mom of his kids? Your post-sex brain shouted yes.

He must have sensed that something was going on inside of your brain, because he wasn’t smiling anymore.

“For the record, I do want to have babies with you,” he said, as if he couldn’t believe you thought otherwise. “Just maybe not now? I’m still twenty-three and you’re almost twenty-five.”

“‘S fine,” you mumbled, hiding your face on his chest. “I know that. I was just being horny.”

You heard his breathy laugh and his chest moving according to the sound. “Yeah. I know that too, baby,”

The jet-lag and the tiredness of the day hit you like a trunk, and you were out not even five minutes later, nestled inside the heavy duvet and Jack’s arms.

“I love you, Soph,” Jack’s whisper was the last thing you heard, making a tired smile appear on your lips.

“‘Love you more.”

| LATER |

liked by dawson1417, _quinnhughes, zendaya and 3,972,082 others

sophiamontenegro 'juno' music video is out now!

starring our nhl stars, _quinnhughes, jackhughes and lhughes_06, my beautiful best friend morgan.grace and my loving niece aurora!

i love all of u and i'm so thankful for all the love you guys have given 'make me yours' so far!!! xx tell me ur favorite positions ;)

View all 13,091 comments

morgan.grace I LOVE YOU

user1 she wrote this during ovulation week bc ain’t no way

lhughes_06 😌

user4 when she sang “god bless your dad’s genetics” and the camera showed quinn jack and luke sitting on the couch I DIED. LIKE HELL YES

user2 idk about you guys but i found it sooo cute when she said “one of me is cute but two though?” and showed a baby who looked just like her 🥹🥹🥹🥹 i need sophia to be a mom right now

nicohischier 😮😮😮

trevorzegras why didn’t u call me, I’m a great actor

sophiamontenegro trevorzegras dwayne get out my fucking comment section. go do something man

user12 my favourite part was when she said “i showed my friends, then we high fived” and it was her and grace stalking jack’s instagram 💀💀

user7 i giggled so hard when she sat on jack’s lap and sang “i’m so fucking horny” and he SMIRKED. HELP 💜

jackhughes you know my favorite one

| the end |

[shhhsecretsideblog]

We're in the hospital waiting room as your sister and labors with her first child. You shift uncomfortably in your chair, partly from the overdue child sitting stubbornly upon your hips and partly from the discomfort you get just from being in a hospital. You were staunchly against having our own baby in such a place, but being here for your sister in spirit was on the shortlist of exceptions.

"I need to go to the bathroom...I'll-I'll be back," You struggle to push out of the chair and rushed away to the bathroom.

I nod affirmatively and lean back in my own chair.

One minute turns into five then into 10...then fifteen. Even as heavy and pregnant as you are, you never took this long.

I look down at the chair and catch a dark, now damp splotch staining the ugly fabric of the chair.

Shit.

“Honey…? Are you in here?” Your nervous voice echos the tiled room as you cautiously peak your head into the ladies bathroom.

It was late, the hospital quiet and empty, the only sound was a deep gravelled moan coming from a single occupied stall. Me.

“Sweetheart, are you okay? Unlock the door for me.” You said with a false calmness, as if trying to reassure an injured animal.

“No….. no- no- no— hooooo-hooooo…” sitting on the toilet, dress bunched up beneath my breasts and knickers round my ankles, I held tight to my spasming pregnant belly and tried to pant through the overwhelming pressure in my pelvis. “Oh god!” I cried out when the wave peaked.

“Kelsey! Open the door, honey.” Your fists bumped against the stall and rattled the hinges.

Somehow, with tears in my eyes, I pulled myself to standing and leaned forward. Unlocking the door I promptly collapsed back down on the toilet, returning to the only position that didn’t make me want to scream. You were by my side in an instant, cupping my face and looking deep into my eyes.

“It’s okay baby, it’s okay.” You whispered, kissing my forehead.

“No— I don’t want to have my b-baby here…” my breath hitched as I tried to hold back the tears, emotions crashing through me at the sight of you.

“Oh I know you wanted a home birth darling, but we’re in a hospital, everything will be fine. And our baby will have the same birthday as their cousin, how cool is that?” You smiled and rubbed my taut belly that was spread over my widened thighs. “I’ll just get a nurse or something, hang on sweetie.”

I grasped your hand before you could leave, gripping your wrist tight, fingernails pressing into your skin. “Don’t— don’t leave me—” I begged.

“But I need to go get someone, honey.”

“You don’t understand… hooooo…. I need— oh god I need to push!” Still holding fast to your hand, my chin lowered to my chest as my body bore down with the next contraction.

“Fuck. Oh Kelsey, no. Don’t push.” You spluttered but I was lost to the urgency of birth.

Gasping for air, I held my breath once more and pushed hard against the bowling ball sitting at the apex of my thighs. The baby’s head was bulging, splitting me open, and I had no control. I had to push…. I just had to.

“Oh— god. It’s coming outttttt!!!” I grunted, deep and primal, tilting my hips and lifting my feet off the floor. “H-help… m-me…”

• ko-fi ☕️ •

[lila-lou]

✨In my time of dying✨

Summary: Dean is in a coma while you wait for him to wake up. My version of S2 E1 - “In My Time of Dying”.

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Warnings: Angst, hurt, some fluff

Word Count: 4193

A/N: English isn’t my first language, so please be lenient. 💙✨

The car crash’s aftermath was a blur of smoke, shattered glass, and the sharp smell of gasoline. You were thrown against the side of the Impala, your head hitting the window hard enough to black out for a few moments. When you came to, everything was chaos. Dean was slumped over the steering wheel, unconscious, with blood trickling down his forehead.

Your heart pounded as you struggled to unbuckle yourself.

You had been with the Winchesters ever since Dean saved you from that vampire nest. You owed them your life, but more than that, you had fallen for Dean. His bravery, his fierce loyalty to his family, and the way he always managed to keep a sense of humor even in the darkest times had all won you over. But you had never dared to tell him. You were younger, and you thought he saw you as just a kid sister, someone to protect.

Finally free of your seatbelt, you reached over to check Dean’s pulse. It was there, faint but steady. Relief washed over you, but it was short-lived.

The next thing you knew, you were being pulled from the wreckage by emergency responders, the world a whirlwind of flashing lights and urgent voices.

The hospital room was sterile and cold, a stark contrast to the warmth and chaos that usually surrounded the Winchesters. Machines beeped rhythmically, marking the passage of time in a way that felt both too fast and excruciatingly slow. You sat in a stiff chair by Dean’s bedside, your own injuries throbbing dully, but they were a distant concern. The nurses had tried to convince you to get some rest, to let them look at your bruised ribs and the cuts on your face, but you had refused. All that mattered was Dean.

It had been 24 hours since the crash. Sam had managed to get some rest, his tall frame awkwardly draped over a couple of chairs in the waiting room. John was still in critical condition, but stable. You couldn’t bring yourself to leave Dean’s side, not even for a moment. Every rise and fall of his chest was a lifeline, a fragile connection that kept you tethered to hope.

You gently held Dean’s hand, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips. His face was pale, the bruises stark against his usually vibrant complexion. You traced the lines of his knuckles, trying to memorize every detail, as if the act could somehow anchor him to this world.

“Dean”, you whispered, your voice cracking. “You have to wake up. We need you. I need you”.

Tears stung your eyes, but you blinked them away. You had to be strong, for him, for Sam, for everyone. Dean had always been the one to keep it together, the rock that everyone leaned on. Now it was your turn to be strong for him.

A soft knock on the door drew your attention. Sam stood there, looking haggard and worried. He gave you a small, tired smile as he stepped into the room.

“Hey”, he said quietly. “How’s he doing?”.

You shook your head slightly. “No change. But he’s strong, Sam. He’ll pull through”.

Sam nodded, coming to stand beside you. He placed a hand on your shoulder, squeezing gently. “You need to rest too, (Y/N). You’re hurt, and you won’t be any good to Dean or anyone if you collapse”.

You looked up at him, seeing the same pain and worry reflected in his eyes. “I can’t leave him, Sam. Not yet”.

Sam sighed, but he didn’t argue. He knew how stubborn you could be, especially when it came to Dean. Instead, he pulled up a chair and sat down next to you, his presence a comforting weight in the silent room.

The hours passed slowly, each minute feeling like an eternity. You and Sam kept vigil by Dean’s side, your concern for him making the time both crawl and fly by. Each beep of the machines felt like a countdown.

A nurse entered the room, her expression professional and calm. She approached Dean’s bed with a clipboard, preparing to check his vitals. You watched her every move, your eyes sharp, your body tense with anticipation. When she adjusted Dean’s IV line a bit too roughly, you snapped.

“Careful!”, you barked, your voice sharp with worry. “He’s not some sack of potatoes you can just fucking toss around”.

The nurse looked up, startled, and Sam placed a hand on your shoulder, trying to soothe you. “Hey, it’s okay, (Y/N). She’s just doing her job”.

You shook your head, unwilling to relent. “I know, but she needs to be gentler. He’s been through enough”.

The nurse nodded apologetically, her movements becoming more deliberate and gentle. “I´m sorry. I’ll be more careful”.

Sam squeezed your shoulder again, this time more firmly. “We all want the best for Dean. Getting angry won’t help him”.

You took a deep breath, trying to calm the storm of emotions inside you. “I know. I just… I can’t stand seeing him like this, Sam. He looks so vulnerable”.

Sam nodded, understanding all too well. “I get it. But we have to trust that they’re doing everything they can to help him”.

You looked at Dean’s peaceful face, feeling a wave of helplessness wash over you. “He has to wake up, Sam. He just has to”.

The hours stretched into an agonizing blur. Sam had gone to check on John, leaving you alone with Dean. The hospital had fallen into a hushed silence, the kind that only seemed to amplify the constant beeping of the machines. Another nurse quietly entered the room, placing a tray with a sandwich and a cup of coffee on the small table by the bed.

“You need to eat something”, she said gently. “You’ve been here a long time”.

You glanced at the food, but the thought of eating made your stomach churn. “Thank you”, you replied softly, but you didn’t touch the tray. The nurse gave you a sympathetic look before leaving you alone again.

It had been 26 hours since the crash. Two days of holding onto hope, two days of watching Dean lie motionless, his life hanging by a thread. Deep down, a gnawing fear had taken root, a voice whispering that he might not make it. You tried to push it away, but it was relentless, growing louder with each passing hour.

Your mind, exhausted and frayed, began to play tricks on you. Shadows seemed to move in the corners of your vision, and you found yourself jumping at the slightest sound. The room felt colder, the walls closing in, suffocating you with their sterile emptiness.

You moved closer to Dean, your tears blurring the sight of his bruised face. “Dean”, you whispered, your voice trembling. “Please, you have to wake up".

Your hand clutched his, holding on as if your touch alone could anchor him to life. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Dean. You mean everything to me. More than you’ll ever know”.

Your sobs echoed softly in the stillness of the room, your shoulders shaking with the weight of your grief. “You’re all I have left, Dean”, you cried, your voice breaking. “You and Sam… You’re my family. But with you, it’s something different. You’ve become my life”.

You clutched his hand tighter, as if by sheer will you could bring him back. “I don’t know what I’ll do if you don’t wake up. I need you to be okay. Please, Dean. You have to come back to us. To me”.

Unbeknownst to you, on the other side, Dean’s spirit watched you, his heart aching at the sight of your despair. He had been wandering the hospital, trying to make sense of his situation, when he found himself drawn back to his own room. Seeing you like this, so broken and vulnerable, was a pain far worse than any physical injury.

Dean moved closer, his ghostly form feeling an overwhelming need to comfort you. “I’m here, (Y/N)”, he whispered, even though he knew by now that you couldn’t hear him. “I’m right here”.

He reached out, his fingers passing through yours, unable to offer the comfort he so desperately wanted to give. He had heard your every word, felt your every tear, and it tore him apart knowing he couldn’t reach you.

The hospital room blurred around him, the lines between the physical and the spiritual world becoming increasingly thin. Dean could feel a presence beside him, familiar and yet unknown. Turning, he saw the Reaper again, her serene expression betraying no emotion.

“I told you already, no!”, Dean growled, his voice echoing in the surreal space. “I can’t leave her. I can’t leave them”.

The Reaper looked at him with understanding but also a firmness that hinted at the inevitability of her role. “Dean, it’s not about what you want. It’s about the natural order. You’ve done your part. It’s time to move on”.

“No!”, Dean shouted, the desperation in his voice matching the intensity of his emotions. “You don’t understand. They need me. She needs me. I won’t abandon them”.

The Reaper’s eyes softened, a glimmer of sympathy flickering in her gaze. “It’s not easy, Dean. The bonds of love and family are strong, but death is a part of life. You can’t fight it forever”.

Dean’s spirit trembled with rage and sorrow, the weight of his love for you and Sam anchoring him to the living world. “I can’t leave her like this. Not after everything. I promised to protect them. To protect her”.

The Reaper sighed, a hint of weariness in her otherwise ethereal demeanor. “Sometimes, even the strongest promises must be broken".

Just then, in the physical world, Sam quietly entered the room. His eyes widened as he saw you slumped over Dean’s hand, tears streaming down your face. The sight of you crying broke his heart, but he knew you needed help too.

“(Y/N)”, Sam said softly, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. “You need to let the doctors check you out. You’ve been here for hours, and you’re hurt”.

You shook your head stubbornly, not taking your eyes off Dean’s face. “I’m not leaving him, Sam. I can’t”.

Sam knelt beside you, his voice gentle but firm. “Dean wouldn’t want you to suffer like this. You’re hurt. You need to take care of yourself too”.

Your tears flowed more freely now, the pain in your heart almost unbearable. “He’s all I have, Sam. I can’t lose him”.

Sam wrapped an arm around you, pulling you into a comforting hug. “I know. I know how much he means to you. But he’d want you to be okay. We need to be strong for him”.

As Sam’s words sank in, you nodded slowly, allowing him to help you to your feet. The room seemed to spin slightly as you stood, your injuries and exhaustion taking their toll. Sam kept a steadying arm around you as he guided you towards the door.

Before leaving, you glanced back at Dean one more time, your heart aching with worry.

Hours later, you sat once again by Dean’s side, bandages now adorning your bruised ribs and cuts. The nurses had managed to patch you up, but despite their best efforts to get you to eat or rest, you refused. Your mind was solely focused on Dean, watching his every breath, willing him to stay with you.

Sam had taken shifts with you, ensuring you were never alone, but now it was just you and Dean again.

Dean’s face was still pale, the bruises stark against his skin. You gently traced the back of his hand with your fingers, your touch light and careful. Despite the stillness, there was an undercurrent of unease, as if something dark was looming just beyond the walls of the hospital.

While you kept vigil, Sam was with John, trying to coax him back to consciousness, but there was a growing fear in both of you that time was running out. You didn’t know it, but something was stirring within John, something that would change everything.

More hours passed, and exhaustion weighed heavily on you, but you refused to leave Dean’s side. Suddenly, you noticed a change in the air. It felt colder, more oppressive. You shivered, though you didn’t know why. Across the hospital, in John’s room, a far more sinister event was unfolding.

John, weakened but resolute, lay in his hospital bed, staring at the ceiling with a grim determination. He knew what he had to do, the price he was about to pay. He could feel the presence of the demon, Azazel, the very one responsible for so much of his family’s pain.

“Azazel”, John whispered, his voice barely audible, but strong enough to cut through the silence.

The demon appeared, its eyes gleaming with a malevolent joy, as if it had been waiting for this moment. “John. I was wondering when you’d come calling”.

John’s eyes were hard, his resolve unshakable. “I want to make a deal”.

Azazel smiled, a cold, predatory smile that sent chills down John’s spine. “I’m listening”.

“I want you to save Dean. Bring him back. Fully. And in exchange…”, John’s voice faltered, but only for a moment. “I’ll give you the Colt. And my soul”.

The demon’s eyes flickered with interest, but it was cunning, calculating. “That’s a hefty price you’re offering, John. But are you sure? You know what this means”.

John nodded, the weight of his decision clear in his expression. “I know. Just save my son”.

Azazel stepped closer, his presence dark and overwhelming. “You know, John, you could have just walked away, left the boy to die. But that’s not your style, is it? Always the martyr”.

John’s jaw clenched, his eyes never wavering. “Just do it”.

Azazel grinned, pleased with the outcome. “As you wish”. He leaned in closer, his voice a sinister whisper. “But remember, when you’re gone, I’ll still be out there. And nothing you do can stop me from coming after Sam. Not even you”.

John’s heart tightened at the thought, but he forced himself to stay focused. “Just save Dean. I’ll handle the rest”.

The demon reached out, and with a single touch, John felt his life slipping away. A cold darkness enveloped him as Azazel claimed his soul, but in those final moments, he clung to the knowledge that he had saved his son.

Back in Dean’s room, you felt an inexplicable shift in the atmosphere. Dean’s hand twitched in yours, his breathing growing stronger, more stable. You gasped, leaning forward as his eyes fluttered open, confusion and pain flickering in his gaze.

As Dean’s eyes slowly fluttered open, a wave of emotions crashed over you, so intense that it nearly took your breath away. You had been holding everything in, trying to be strong, but the sight of him awake, alive, was more than you could bear.

Tears filled your eyes, blurring your vision, but you didn’t care. All you could focus on was the fact that Dean was here, that he had come back to you. A choked sob escaped your lips, and before you knew it, you were throwing your arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace.

“Dean”, you whispered, your voice trembling with overwhelming relief. “You’re okay. You’re really okay”.

Dean, still groggy and disoriented, could only manage a weak smile as he felt your arms around him. The tube in his throat made it difficult for him to respond, but the way his hand reached up to weakly pat your back showed that he understood your relief.

But you were holding on so tightly, pouring out all the fear and worry you had been bottling up, that you didn’t realize how hard you were squeezing him. Dean’s eyes widened slightly in surprise, and he made a small noise, trying to get your attention.

“(Y/N)…can’t…breathe…”, Dean tried to say, but his voice was muffled and weak against the tube.

Realizing that you were practically smothering him, you quickly pulled back, your eyes wide with a mix of shock and embarrassment. “Oh shit, I’m sorry!”, you blurted out, immediately loosening your grip but keeping your hands gently on his shoulders.

Half an hour later, after the doctor had checked on Dean and confirmed that he was indeed stable, the room felt lighter, filled with a sense of relief that had been absent for too long. You sat close to Dean, still holding onto his hand as if afraid to let go, while Sam hovered nearby, watching his brother closely.

Dean, though still a bit pale and obviously tired, seemed more like his old self with each passing minute. His humor was coming back, and he was starting to grow impatient with the confines of the hospital bed. Finally, he decided he had had enough.

“I’m getting out of here”, Dean declared, his voice still a little raspy but strong with determination.

Sam raised an eyebrow, clearly skeptical. “Dean, you were just in a coma. Are you sure you’re okay to be moving around?”.

Dean rolled his eyes, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. “I’m fine, Sam. The doctor said I’m stable, and I’m not sticking around here any longer than I have to”.

You shared a look with Sam, both of you equally concerned but also understanding that Dean was never one to stay down for long. “Dean, maybe you should take it easy”, you suggested, though you could already tell by the determined glint in his eye that he wasn’t going to listen.

Ignoring your concern, Dean stood up slowly, testing his balance. He wobbled for a second, and you instinctively reached out to steady him, but he waved you off with a grin. “See? I’m good”, he said confidently, though the effort was clearly taxing.

Sam sighed, running a hand through his hair. “You’re impossible, you know that?”.

Dean shrugged, a playful smile tugging at his lips.

He reached for his clothes, which had been folded neatly on a chair beside the bed. As he turned around to grab them, you and Sam both couldn’t help but burst into soft laughter. His hospital gown had ridden up, revealing a rather undignified view of his backside.

“Dean, your… uh… gown’s not exactly covering everything”, you said between fits of laughter, your previous tension finally breaking into something lighter.

Dean froze, then looked over his shoulder, realizing the situation. “Seriously?”, he muttered, his cheeks flushing slightly, though he quickly recovered and shot you both a mock glare. “You guys enjoying the view?”.

Sam was practically doubled over with laughter now, the stress of the past few days melting away in the ridiculousness of the moment. “Oh man, Dean, you really know how to make an exit”.

You tried to stifle your giggles as you stepped forward to help him, holding the back of the gown closed while he reached for his jeans. “Come on, let’s get you dressed before you traumatize anyone else”.

Dean huffed in mock indignation as he quickly pulled on his clothes, the familiar routine grounding him back into reality.

As Dean finished pulling on his jeans, Sam, still chuckling, muttered, “I’m gonna grab some coffee. Dean, you look like you could use one too”.

Dean smirked, giving Sam a nod. “Yeah, I could use a good cup of coffee”.

Sam glanced at you both before heading towards the door. “I’ll be right back”, he said, then stepped out, leaving you and Dean alone in the quiet room.

You turned back to Dean, ready to help him gather the rest of his things, but the moment you reached for his bag, Dean’s hand shot out, grasping your wrist a bit more firmly than usual. The unexpected touch made you pause, and you looked up to find him staring at you with an intensity that took your breath away.

“(Y/N)”, Dean started, his voice softer now, filled with something deeper than his usual bravado. You could see the tension in his eyes, the way his thoughts seemed to be racing as he stood just inches away from you.

Your heart pounded in your chest, the room suddenly feeling smaller, as if the space between you was charged with electricity. Dean had always been close to you, but this was different. There was something raw and unguarded in the way he was looking at you, something that sent a shiver down your spine.

Before you could say anything, before you could even fully process what was happening, Dean moved. He pulled you closer, his grip on your waist firm, while his other hand came up to gently cup your face. You barely had time to react before his lips were on yours.

The kiss was sudden, but it was everything you had imagined it would be—warm, intense, and filled with all the unspoken emotions that had been simmering between you for so long. Dean kissed you with a passion that left no room for doubt, his lips moving against yours as if he was trying to pour everything he felt into that one, breathtaking moment.

You melted into his touch, your hands resting weakly against his chest as your heart clenched with a mix of overwhelming emotions. Every thought, every fear, every doubt you’d had over the past hours seemed to dissolve in that moment, replaced by the warmth of Dean’s embrace and the fervor in his kiss.

Time seemed to stop as you lost yourself in him, the world narrowing down to just the two of you. His hands, rough yet gentle, held you close, grounding you in the reality of the moment. This was real. Dean was here, and he wanted you just as much as you wanted him.

After what felt like an eternity, he slowly broke the kiss, his breathing heavy as he pressed his forehead against yours. His hands remained on your waist and face, anchoring you to him, as if afraid you might disappear if he let go.

“I’ve wanted to do that for the last 48 hours”, Dean murmured, his voice low and filled with emotion. His breath was warm against your skin, sending a shiver down your spine.

You opened your eyes, finding his gaze locked on yours, filled with a mixture of relief, longing, and something deeper that made your heart swell. “Dean…”, you whispered, your voice trembling slightly. “I’ve wanted this for so much longer”.

He closed his eyes briefly, as if letting the weight of your words sink in, before opening them again, his expression softening. “I know”, he admitted, his thumb gently stroking your cheek. “Me too… I was just too damn stubborn to admit it”.

A small, tearful laugh escaped you, and you leaned into his touch, feeling the tension of the past few days finally start to ease. “I was scared, Dean. Scared that I’d never get to tell you how I feel. That I’d lose you before I ever got the chance”.

Dean shook his head slightly, his forehead still pressed against yours. “You’re not gonna lose me”, he promised, his voice full of conviction. “Not now, not ever. I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere”.

Tears welled up in your eyes again, but this time they were tears of happiness, of relief. You brought your hands up to rest against his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart beneath your palms.

He pulled you into another kiss, this one slower, more tender, as if he was savoring every second of it. And you kissed him back, pouring all your love, all your fears, and all your hopes into it. This was a new beginning for both of you, a step into something that had always been there, just waiting for the right moment to be realized.

When you finally broke apart, you rested your head against his chest, listening to the rhythm of his heartbeat. Dean wrapped his arms around you, holding you close, his chin resting on the top of your head. For a moment, you both just stood there, wrapped up in each other, the world outside fading into insignificance.

Dean smiled down at you, his eyes filled with a warmth that made your heart flutter, before he spoke up again. "How´s dad?".

———————————

A/N: Please let me know what you think.🥰 

-

Taglist: @blackcherrywhiskey @baby19sthings @suckitands33 @spnfamily-j2 @lyarr24 @deans-baby-momma @reignsboy19 @kawaii-arfid-memes @mekkencspony @lovziy @artemys-ackles @fitxgrld @libby99hb @lovelyvirtualperson @a-lil-pr1ncess @nancymcl @the-last-ry @spndeanwinchesterlvr @hobby27 @themarebarroww @kr804573 @impala67rollingthroughtown @deans-queen @deadlymistletoe @selfdestructionandrhum @utyblyn @winchesterwild78 @jackles010378 @chirazsstuff @foxyjwls007 @smoothdogsgirl @woooonau @whimsyfinny

[d-targaryenshoe]

Frozen Pain - Jackson Avery

Word count: 1600

Summary: Love that's real, doesn't know a distance, does it?

You're holding a cup of coffee, comfortable in the luxurious beige couch in your penthouse apartment in New York. You held a letter in your hand, visibly upset.

Hey y/n

I hope this letter finds you very fast. It has been quite some time since we last saw each other at the hospital, or even had a good talk.

And I wanted to let you know that everyone misses you so bad. The hospital just isn't the same without you, or our after-shift drinks at Joe's.

There have been changes since you left. So stay calm when reading this. But Jackson and Maggie are dating now. It came as a surprise to all of us, and it may seem evil but I miss seeing you happy with him.

 I thought you should know since you were...you know what I mean.

I know it's been a while since we last spoke, but I hope you'll find the time to write back when you receive this letter.

Take care, I hope to hear from you soon.

Amelia

"I can't believe this... Jackson and Maggie?" You muttered to yourself placing your cup of coffee on the table and folding the letter closed. 

Images of you and Jackson together, happy and in love, flash across the screen. The memories of your past relationship flood your mind.

You take a deep breath, trying to compose yourself. You pick up your phone and dial Amelia's number. After a few rings, she answers.

"You have no idea how much I waited to hear you." Amelia sounded emotional about the fact she noticed you calling for the first time after you had left. "Y/n?"

"Amelia, why didn't you tell me about them when I was still there?" Your voice trembled even if you didn't want it to. "I should've known, you know I should've."

" I didn't know how to break it to you. I thought it would be better if you heard it from me." Amelia spoke, sounding apologetic.

"Well, thanks for that. I can't believe he moved on so quickly." You sighed, leaning back into the couch, staring out of your window. "Maybe I left at the right time."

"I know it hurts, but y/n, you decided to leave Seattle. You had to follow your dreams, remember?" Amelia reminded you.

You sighed deeply, nodding your head even if she couldn't see. " I know, but it doesn't make it any easier. I thought what we had was special."

"It was special, and it still is. But sometimes life takes unexpected turns. You deserve happiness too, you know that." She answered on the other side.

" I just wish I didn't have to find out this way." You muttered, wiping away the tears that fell from your teary eyes.

"I understand. But remember, I'm here for you, no matter what." The Shepherd sister spoke. "Just remember, you're strong and capable of creating your happiness."

 "I will try to remember that." You hang up the phone and take a moment to collect yourself. Despite the pain, you know deep down that you made the right decision by pursuing your career in New York. 

You open your laptop that's on the coffee table and check your emails. You notice a mail from Jo with the subject 'Don't hate me'. You click on the email and start reading.

From: Jo Wilson 

Subject: Don't hate me

Hey y/n,

I hope you're all settled and doing great. I wanted to let you know something that happened yesterday. 

I bumped into Jackson and Maggie in the parking lot, and it seemed like they were arguing, or breaking up, or anything else that wasn't any good. And yes, sometimes I'm too nosy.

 I know your history with Jackson, so I thought I should let you know.

But here's the thing... I accidentally I repeat, accidentally, let it slip that you live in New York.

 I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to reveal any of it! Not without your permission. I just wanted to give you a heads-up that there's a big chance he's on his way to you. 

You quickly close the laptop, unsure of what to do next.

You grab your cup of coffee and walk over to the sink. You place the cup in the sink and turn on the faucet, letting the warm water flow.

"Might as well do something productive to distract me." You whispered to yourself, looking at the dishes. 

You proceed to wash the glasses, rinsing off any soap residue before placing them on a drying rack. 

Suddenly you hear a knock on the door. You cautiously make your way to the door and open it, revealing the last person you'd expect standing on the other side.

Not thinking for another second you tried to shut the door.

"Even three seconds is enough...I just need to know that you're okay." He said, placing a hand on the door, making sure you didn't close it. "Wilson told me you took the offer in New York. I just- I had to see it for myself."

"Well, as you can see. I'm in New York not in Seattle." You shrugged at the man you once fell for or still had, but you couldn't show. "Maggie knows you're here?"

"Who told you that..." He furrowed his eyebrows, taking his hand off the door. 

"Amelia wrote me, Jackson. I know you've moved on, so I think it's best if you do as well." You gave him a small smile, trying to close the door once again. 

 "You've been avoiding my calls and messages. Can we at least talk?" Jackson asked, his eyes staring back at yours. 

" I guess we can talk, but I'm not sure what there is left to say." You sighed, opening the door wider for him to walk inside. "What do you want to know?"

You closed the door, sitting down on your couch.

"I just want to understand why you left so suddenly without talking to me. I thought we had something special." He folded his hands on top of his knees, looking at you. 

You shook your head in denial, staring at the ceiling, feeling the tears pricking in your eyes. "Jackson, it's not that simple. Andrew died, Alex left, Meredith was going to leave, and I needed some time to process everyone leaving me."

"But why didn't you talk to me? We've always been open and honest with each other." Jackson turned his body towards you, leaning an arm on the couch headrest. 

" I know, and I'm sorry. I should have talked to you, but I was terrified. Scared of losing you, scared of facing my own emotions." You answered, placing your face in your hands. 

"I broke things off with Maggie, she...she doesn't feel as home as you do. We've been through hell and back, we can do it again." He said.

"Jackson, it's not that simple. We both have our baggage and unresolved issues. We can't just start from where everything ended?" You got up from the couch, walking over to the huge window, staring down at the busy city.

"I believe in us. I believe that we can work through our problems together." He spoke as you felt him standing behind you.

"I need time to figure things out. I need to understand my feelings and what I want. It's not fair to either of us to rush into anything." You replied, turning around, your heart quickening as you stared back into his bright eyes. 

As Jackson stood in front of you, his eyes filled with determination, you felt your resolve waver. 

"I'd do anything if I have to, only to make things work out between us," he said earnestly.

You let out a heavy sigh, "Jackson, you know it's not that simple. You've just left Maggie behind."

"I know, I know," he said, running a hand over his head. "But I've let go of things in the past that I regret now, but y/n, you? You're, you're something I could never regret, ever."

You turned back around, fighting back the emotions swirling inside of you. "I don't know if I can do this again." You whispered.

"Just...just give me a chance to show you." he pleaded, taking a step closer to you.

The memories flooded back, the laughs, the tears, the late-night conversations. Despite your best efforts, you felt a small smile tug at the corners of your lips. 

You looked up at him, and he smiled back, a hopeful glint in his eyes, and the city lights twinkled outside the floor-to-ceiling windows of your penthouse.

 He leaned in, and your heart skipped a beat as his lips met yours. The kiss was intense, filled with both longing and regret.

"What are we doing?" you whispered, breaking away.

"Right now? I don't know," he confessed. "But I miss this and I miss us."

The ache in his words mirrored your own emotions, but you knew it was dangerous to reopen old wounds. "We can't keep doing this to ourselves," you said, trying to keep your voice steady.

"I know, but I can't walk away." Jackson pleaded, his eyes searching yours.

A surge of conflicting emotions coursed through you, and you let out a frustrated moan. "And you think, I can?" you admitted, feeling the weight of those words hanging in the air.

He pulled you close, and a bittersweet laughter filled the room. "Then let's try," he said, his voice determined.

As you looked into his eyes, the city hummed in the background, and you knew this decision would change everything.

[aliaology]

NEVER GROW UP

summary: reader watched all of her younger brothers grow up and can’t help but remember

pairings: hughes brothers x older sister!reader

warnings: none

extra: readers birthday is in february! and also idk if all three brothers were in hs at the same time, because of where their birthdays fall, but lets just say if quinn was a senior, jack would be a junior and luke would be a freshie!! its all because of where quinns birthday falls, if his birthday was in like sept, i think he wouldve been out of hs by the time lukes a freshie but wtvr.

three year old you sat in the waiting room, in your grandfathers lap, as you waited for your dad to come out of the hospital room and take you in. it wasn’t a long wait, maybe because you were drowning out the sound of the wailing cries of a baby, focusing on your grandfathers book. not like you could read it anyways.

“honey, come here” you heard, your head snapping in the direction the voice came from. it was your father, waving you in.

a big smile lit on your face as you hopped off of your grandfathers lap and ran towards your dad. he grabbed your hand and quietly brought you in the room. your mom laid on the hospital bed, a bundle in her arms. your dad lifted you up and brought you to her.

“hi baby” ellen said. “this is your brother, this is quinn” she spoke.

your smile stayed on your face as your dad leaned you towards the baby. “gentle, okay?” you nodded.

your fingers grazed your newborn brother’s face, then his hand. his little fingers clutched yours. “hi baby” you whispered to him.

your mom chuckled. “baby, his name is quinn. can you said quinn?” she asked.

“ki—kinn” you smiled.

your mom ran a hand through your hair. “good job baby”

two days later, quinn was brought home. you were quiet when he was asleep, quiet because you were in his room watching him, making sure he was okay. you watched him breathe, making sure it looked normal, or at least— what you thought was normal.

you were there to protect him, even if you were only three. “honey..” you turned to the doorway. your father and mother stood there.

“its time to go to bed, lovie” your father said.

you frowned and looked back at your brother. his eyelids fluttered as he dreamed. you let out a sigh. you reach your hand through the bars and tuck his bundle just a little more under him.

you got up and ran to your room before running back in, holding some object up to your parents.

“do this please?” you spoke as best as you could.

jim smiled softly and took it from you. he brought it over to the outlet near quinn’s crib and plugged the nightlight in. you smiled and pressed a button, turning it on.

in their eyes, they knew you would be an amazing sister.

five year old you sat in the waiting room, next to your grandfather who held one year old (almost two) quinn on his lap. quinn giggled at whatever funny thing your grandfather did.

your father walked out of the room, walking to you guys. “you two ready to meet your new brother?” he asked.

you nodded with a smile, hopping out of your seat. quinn didn’t understand much, but he had a happy face nonetheless.

your dad picked up quinn and held your hand, bringing you to the room. your mom held a bundle, again. your dad picked you up with his free arm, and set you next to your mom. he held onto quinn, allowing the boy to look at his younger brother.

“hi loves, meet jack” ellen smiled.

you smile and carefully caress one of his cheeks, before going to his hand. just like quinn, his fingers clasped around yours.

“hi jacky” you whispered.

as soon as he was brought home, you went to his and quinns (now) shared room and made sure the nightlight was in there, along with your pillow and blanket that lied next to the crib and on the floor.

much like you did with quinn, when jack slept, you watched. watched to make sure he was gonna be okay. to protect him. but he wasn’t the only one you watched.

you now watched both of your little brothers. you made sure they were tucked in at night, made sure they had their pacifiers and made sure the night light was always on.

you would be asleep on the floor next to jack’s crib by the time your parents came to get you. they never moved you though, they knew being in there brought you a sense of peace. their only concern was how you were able to sleep on the floor so peacefully.

as time went on, jack and quinn were already so different. jack was more vocal, more loud, a little more annoying, but you still adored him.

as he grew slightly more, he seemed to find everything funny. literally, everything. from you snapping your fingers in his or quinns face, to you even just holding him, he’d burst into giggles.

quinn on the other hand, he was quiet, calm, he liked to sleep when next to you. he was always at peace.

even though you were five, you’d make sure they would stay like that. happy, and never have regrets.

seven year old you sat in the waiting room. three (almost four!) year old quinn sat squished in your seat with you, and two year old jack sat on your lap. your grandfather sat next to you guys, waiting for your dad to get you all.

when he did, jack jumped out of his seat and bolted it for the room. you got out of your seat and helped quinn too before following your father.

jack was already on the bed by the time you got in, sitting on your moms legs as he looked at the baby in wonder. your father picked you up, setting you next to your mom, before picking quinn up. the family looked at the newest hughes.

“this is luke.” your mom smiled.

“loo—luuke” quinn spoke, slightly struggling, but getting it. you looked at your brother, caressing his face just like you did to both quinn and jack. then you grabbed his hand. he also grabbed yours.

“mama?” jacks voice rang out.

ellen looked at him. “is that?” jack pointed at the wrist band. he clearly wanted to know what it was.

“it means im a patient here baby, soon it will be off and we can go home” jack smiled at “go home” and clapped.

once luke was home, it was a cycle repeat. this time though, quinn was no longer in the room. he had his own room, right next to yours. before you’d go to bed, you would go to his room and make sure he was asleep.

you were able to get your mom to buy a nightlight that was the exact same as the one you had originally. you put the replica in jack and lukes room, giving quinn the original.

it was next to his bed, illuminating his face.

as soon as you knew he was all set, you tucked him in slightly more, and placed a small kiss on his forehead. then, you left to jack and lukes room.

jack was sound asleep, snoring quietly. you tucked him in too, placing a small kiss on his cheek.

you then went over to luke, who peacefully slept in his bundle. you sat down next to his crib and watched him, making sure he was okay. when you deemed it long enough, you lied down, on the floor, and fell asleep.

seventeen year old you sat on your bed, listening to thirteen year old (almost fourteen) quinn rant about how he was scared for his first day of freshman year. you pushed your book to the side and grabbed his shoulders.

“look at me, if any kid tries to mess with you, you tell me, alright? im not gonna let some weirdo mess with my little brother.” you told.

quinn nodded. you removed your hands from his shoulders, looking him in the eyes. “quinny, can you do me a favor?” you asked.

“whats up?”

you sighed, “when jack gets into highschool next year, watch out for him, okay? and then when lukes in highschool, watch for him too. you hear me? or make jack do it, but i want you to look out for them because i wont be able to, okay? im gonna do my best to help you this year too.” you told.

quinn nodded. “okay y/n/n” you smiled and brought your brother into a hug. “love you quinny”

“love you too sissy”

you’re now nineteen, quinns suddenly sixteen, jacks fourteen, and lukes twelve. you’re home for a week before you have to go all the way back to new jersey so you can go straight back to princeton.

jack groaned as ellen went to start the car. “why cant i walk there?” he whined.

you rolled your eyes. “shut up jack, if you walk there, you wont make it in time.”

“but all my friends are walking!” he complained.

“jack shut up, you can’t do anything about it so stop complaining. you’re gonna get there on time, and be warm while doing so. its cold here, you will be fine! plus, do you really want to carry your large bag full of hockey gear in the blistering cold? probably not!” you explained.

he crossed his arms and stomped towards the front door. “god i cannot wait to move out on my own.”

you sighed and grabbed his arm before he could leave. “look jack, listen to me. mom doesnt have to do this for you, you know that right? but shes not gonna make her son walk in the damn cold. and jack don’t make her drop you off around the block either. you need to understand that shes your mom, she’s getting older, she just wants to spend time with you.” you told him.

you could hear him sigh under his breath. “im sorry” he spoke. you ruffled his hair. “dont apologize, bub, just go out to the car, hang out with her until she gets you to the rink, and then have fun at practice. ill be picking you up.”

jack grinned before running out to the car.

“hes so annoying” quinn groaned. “tell me about it” luke retorted. “i had to room with him my entire life and i still do!”

“oh boohoo” quinn replied.

“luke, jack tells me all the time that you’re the annoying one! dancing around in pjs before school starts.” you laugh, walking over to your brothers.

“whatever” he grumbled.

you chuckled and ruffled his hair. “dont ever change, bud.”

luke sat on your bed, head on your chest as he cries. fourteen year old luke was crying over hockey and his coach. twenty-one year old you was holding him close. “let it out, lukey.”

he sniffled and cried, tears staining your shirt. “am i really that bad at hockey?” he asked.

you pulled him away from you and held him by his shoulders. “god no, lukey. you’re fucking incredible at hockey! you’re gonna go somewhere with your talent!”

“but coach rhines said im useless.” he spoke.

your brows furrowed. luke wasn’t a crier, so this was hard on not just him, but you as well. “you aren’t useless, luke. coach rhines is useless because what the fuck does he do besides sit on his ass and yell at you and your team? nothing! remember that, lukey. jesus, is this your school coach?” you asked.

“no— hes the rec coach” luke wiped his eyes.

“well, throw that jersey away because after i have a talk with him, you’re switching teams.” you spoke. “i dont care if i have to pay for it or whatever, you aren’t staying with him.”

“okay” luke whispered.

you frowned and grabbed the boy, tackling him into a hug. his laughs erupted throughout the room as your legs wrapped around his, keeping him in your hold.

your fingers tickled his sides. he laughed and tried to move away. “ill stop once you say you’re one of the best hockey players ever!” you laughed.

“b—but sidney crosby!” he laughed harder as you tickled him more.

“okay okay! im one of the best hockey players ever!” he spoke, expecting you to stop. you didn’t.

“gotta say it like you mean it kid!” you laughed.

after yelling it a few times and laughter cutting him off each time, you stopped. you both lied on your bed, your legs draped over his. “movie night?”

“yes please!”

summer vacation. all three brothers, and then your parents, would be here soon. five minutes. you walked into your childhood room. the walls still had your pages clipped to them.

your guitar lied in the corner of your room.

you took mental pictures, knowing most of this stuff would be leaving with you for when you moved into your apartment. you took mental pictures of it all.

you sat down on your bed. the only sound in the entire house was the creak of the bed frame. you remember sitting here and being able to hear when your father walked up the front porch steps, signaling he was home. he was the only one who used the front door, along with jack.

you remember this room almost being the meeting room with your brothers when you were here. quinn coming in for advice. jack coming in because he liked a girl. luke coming in because he felt like he was bad at hockey.

you also remember being able to hear either of your brothers blasting their favorite songs because the walls are that thin.

but now, you sat here realizing that at some point, all of this would be gone. no more house, no more memories, no more family.

you sat on your bed, crying. crying until you heard footsteps on the front porch and jack laugh at something he said.

you wiped your tears and walked down stairs. you walked to the front door and opened it as your dad was about to unlock it.

“in case you forgot, dad, no one used the front door” you smiled.

jim grinned and pulled you into a hug. “theres my favorite daughter”

“im your only daughter”

“so it works!”

vancouver, canada. a place home to the canucks, the team quinn played for. he stood next to you in the empty apartment that was a few doors down from his. jack and luke went back outside, going to grab a few more boxes of yours.

your parents would be flying in tomorrow to see you.

“vancouvers colder than i thought.” you told, voice in the middle of cracking.

quinn looked at you. “whats wrong?”

you shrugged him off. “its nothing, quinny. im okay, really.”

quinn scoffed. “tell me whats wrong, sissy. let me be here for you this time. you were always there for me, so its my turn. what is wrong?”

you sniffle before starting to cry. “i wish i never grew up quinny. god i miss when you, jack and luke were little. i miss being little. having no responsibilities, no regrets, being happy all the time. and i dont want to grow up anymore. i want to stop and stay young forever because the cost of growing up is losing you guys.”

quinn grabbed you and hugged you tight. he let you cry into his shoulder, and soon enough, jack and luke joined the hug too. you didn’t want to grow up. not anymore.

ynhughes

liked by jackhughes, _quinnhughes and 287,208 others.

ynhughes wont let nobody hurt you, wont let no one break your heart. and even though you want to, please try and never grow up 🤍

tagged: jackhughes, _quinnhughes, lhughes_06

comments are limited.

jackhughes love u sissy 🤍

ynhughes 🤍

lhughes_06 i love u sis even tho we have the biggest age gap ur still my role model

ynhughes literal tears i hate u

lhughes_06 ❤️

_quinnhughes always will be the best sibling, sissy ❤️❤️

jackhughes hurts that this is true 😞

lhughes_06 so true 💔

ynhughes ☹️☹️❤️❤️

trevorzegras fr best sister ever i mean no one can make pancakes the way you do

jackhughes u ruined the vibe gtfo

trevorzegras sorry ☹️😞

i love this imagine sm

[achilles-rage]

Off Limits

summary: you're street's foster sister and a hacker for swat, and rocker can't keep his eyes off you. one night a case you helped rocker with leads you into danger, landing you in the hospital. rocker's protectiveness of you has street a little confused, and it takes a while before street finally realizes that your feelings for each other are real, leading to confessed feelings.

word count: 6.7k

request- @melodyflowersblog: What about a swat fic with rocker X fem reader, where is street or Chris sister who is always at their work, either she is like a hacker or some other reason, and her and rocker get closer as time goes on and no one knows until there is like a shooting and reader gets hurt and he gets protective of her even when she's cleared from hospital, and everyone can see the love in his eyes or something like that

A/N: i decided to make the reader street's foster sibling so it could be race inclusive! pls let me know if i wrote anything that was not race inclusive! and i don’t know anything about computers so if anything i wrote doesn’t make sense just close your eyes<3 and also

plot hole!!! big dumb idiot alert!!! apartments have those doors at the front you need a key to get into!! get over it!!!! and street leaves the apartment after helping rocker drop reader off!!! and he has no car!!! just pretend he took an uber!!!! that's all, enjoy<3

warnings: reader's house is broken into and she's held a gunpoint, making out at the end lolz, flirty rocker<3, no use of y/n, plus size!reader fem!reader, race inclusive!reader

“Miss me, sweetheart?” you hear Rocker say as he walks into your office, winking as you turn to look at him, forcing you to fight back a smile.

After your brother Street helped you get a job at SWAT, everyone was quick to welcome you with open arms, but Rocker had seemed to take a special interest in you. You, Street, and Nate were always close growing up, living in the same foster home, with them coming to your rescue when the other kids teased or picked on you. With the trouble Jim and Nate had gotten into as kids, you took it upon yourself to help them out of their predicaments, learning that knowing how to hack let you erase security footage, and blackmail some bad people they had gotten themselves tied up with.

You were a breath of fresh air to Rocker at SWAT, your introverted personality a stark contrast to the officers he worked with. You were brilliant, and you had an eye for figuring out things that the other tech assistants couldn’t. And your pretty face and gorgeous, soft body definitely had nothing to do with his infatuation.

“What do you need, Rocker?” you ask softly, face growing hot as you turn back to your computer, rolling your eyes. You feel him lean over your shoulder, hand on the back of your chair, looking at the words and numbers on your screen, pretending to know what the hell he was looking at.

“Can’t I visit my favourite girl without needing something? Maybe I’m just here to see your pretty face,” he teases, looking down at you, a smirk on his face.

Rocker had been flirting with you for months, loving the way you react to his words, his looks. He’s used to flirting with people sometimes to get what he wants, but with you, he seems to go the extra mile, not stopping until he leaves you a flustered and stuttering mess. He loves the way you look down, muttering something about getting back to work, or how you look up at him with those doe eyes, breath catching in your throat. 

“Shut up,” you whisper, fingers slightly shaking, hovering over your keyboard. “What do you need?” you ask again, biting your lip as you stare at the screen, trying to ignore the way your stomach flips as you feel the heat radiating off of him. 

“We found out who the head of that cartel the squad is working on is, but he’s up in the air. Is there any way you can work your magic and find anything else on him? I’m desperate here, princess.” he explains, and you can’t ignore the way his voice grows more stressed as he nears the end of his sentence.

You nod, smiling softly, as your fingers begin to move, eyes combing over credit card uses and security cam footage of various cartel members, hoping to find something to set him on the right track. 

He watches you work, eyes gazing down from your screen to you. The way your hair looks perfectly styled, how he can see a glimpse of your chest from the angle he was standing over you, the softness of your thighs spread across your chair. He had to look away, clearing his throat quietly as his mind began being overrun by your thick thighs and how they would feel wrapped around him.

“Why didn’t you ask Jacobs to do this? He knows more about your case than I do.” you ask softly as you work, glancing at him from the corner of your eye, taking in his features. You’re glad he was here regardless, happy to spend a few minutes with him, despite the hammering of your heart in your chest and the way your breath quickened. You may or may not have a small crush on him, not that it could ever happen. Him and Jim may be friendly now, but you can tell that they butt heads every now and then, and with how protective Jim is of you, you know better than to ever do anything about your silly little work crush. You’re too shy, anyway. No matter how giddy his advances make you, you know nothing will ever come of this.

“Yeah, but he’s not near as fun to talk to as you. And you’re good, sweetheart. I have a feeling you may find something that he’s too stupid to catch onto.” he teases softly, looking down at you, smirking, his eyes not leaving you as he studied your frame.

You shake your head, fighting back a smile as you continue to work, trying to ignore the way he leaned in closer to you. After a few minutes, you make a small noise of victory, turning to look up at him, smiling.

“1435 West Park Avenue, room 219.” you whisper, watching his eyebrows furrow. “His right hand man. He has two aliases, but nothing was coming up for either of them, so I put the first name of one with the last name of the other. It’s being used at a shitty motel downtown, and it’s being paid for by a credit card that was just reported stolen. The credit card payment said he checked in the day the cartel leader went MIA. I hacked into the motel’s security footage. That’s him, right?” you ask, excitement flooding your body as Rocker looks at the slightly blurry security footage, a smile breaking out onto his face. He leans down, kissing the top of your head, laughing softly.

“That’s my girl. You’re a genius, sweetheart.” he says happily, earning a giggle from you as you shake your head.

“It was a lucky guess,” you whisper, biting the inside of your lip as you break eye contact, face getting hot.

“And yet, Jacobs didn’t find it, you did. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re doing this so that I’ll come to you more often. Especially when you’re wearing clothes you know will drive me crazy,” he teases, smirking, crossing his arms over his chest as he looks down at you, eyes glancing down to your cleavage peeking out of your low-cut shirt.

You look back up at him with wide eyes, scoffing as you fight back a smile. “I’m not doing anything,” you protest, trying not to look away as his intense gaze meets yours.

As Rocker is about to respond, your brother walks in, looking at the lack of space between the two of you. How Rocker was standing in front of your chair, arms crossed, smirking down at you.

“What’s going on in here?” Street asks, eyebrow raised, leaning on the doorframe. You look up at him, smiling softly, shaking your head as you try to collect your thoughts.

“Nothing. Just helping Rocker with his case. What’s up?” you explain, standing up from your chair as Rocker backs up. Rocker shoots you a wink before turning, walking out the door, nodding to Street as he walks past him.

“Thanks again, sweetheart!” Rocker shouts as he steps into the hall, Street’s eyes narrowing as his eyes follow Rocker down the hall.

“What the hell was that?” Street whispers as he turns back to you, walking into your office, arms crossed over his chest.

“Nothing, don’t worry about it. He just likes getting a rise out of you, you know that.” you tell Street, letting out a soft exhale, trying to calm your nerves. Why did it feel like you’ve been caught doing something wrong? Other than the less than pure thoughts running through your head, nothing had actually happened.

“Yeah, whatever. He’s a flirt. Just…don’t get attached or anything, okay? I know you. You fall for people too fast. Remember that guy we met at the beach when we were 15? You wouldn’t shut up about him for weeks,” he teases, laughing softly.

“Alright, we were 15, and he promised he’d take me to that concert I wanted to go to that you and Nate refused to go with me to,” you argue, rolling your eyes, smiling softly at the memory. This earns a snort from Street as he shrugs, shaking his head.

“I’m just saying. Okay?” he says, eyes softer as he grabs your shoulders, ducking his head slightly to meet your gaze.

You nod, muttering a quiet ‘okay’ as you look up at him, giving him a small smile. He smiles back, patting your shoulder before letting you go, backing up towards the door. 

“Team’s going out for drinks tonight, if you wanna come? They’d love to have you there,” he tells you.

“Nah, I’m pretty tired. I think I’m just gonna head home, have a night in,” you tell him, sitting back down at your desk, waving him off. “Now get back to work before Hondo fires you. Again.” you tease, turning your chair around to face your computer.

You hear him laugh as he walks away, letting you get back to work. As you continue doing some digging for various cases SWAT has open, your mind trails off to Rocker. You know you shouldn’t, but you can’t help it. The biggest reason he makes you so flustered is the way his eyes scan you whenever he sees you. You were a little surprised at first, noticing how his eyes fell from your chest to your plush stomach, your thick thighs. Your tits, you were used to, but you could feel your body grow hot as he examined all of you in a way you weren’t used to. He was good with his words too. Always knowing what to say to make you stutter, your palms growing sweaty as your eyes trailed down to the way his arms flex in his tight uniform shirts. 

You look at the bottom corner of your screen after a couple more hours of work, noticing the time as your brain returns to the task at hand, your thoughts still foggy with thoughts of Rocker and his stupid attractive face. You stand up, grabbing your purse and walk out of your office, making your way to your car to drive home. You say a quick goodbye to everyone as you walk out to your car, noticing 50 squad pulling into the parking lot, returning from the motel you sent them to earlier.

“You get him?” you call across the parking lot as Rocker steps out of the armored truck.

He turns to you, a smile breaking out on his face as his eyes meet yours.

“All thanks to you, sweetheart!” He yells back, winking at you.

You laugh softly, smiling to yourself as you reach your car, eyes looking down as you shake your head.

It’s almost 11PM when you hear a crash coming from your living room. You sit up quickly in bed, breath catching in your throat as you put a hand over your mouth, listening to the quiet that envelopes you.

You wait a moment before you hear a quiet voice in your hallway, whispering to someone, then you hear two sets of footsteps slowly getting closer to your room. Your eyes widen, and you quickly get out of bed, silently making your way to your doorway, masked by the darkness of your room.

You tense as you see one of the men you were looking into earlier; one of the lower level members of the cartel you were helping Rocker’s team with. You tiptoe to your closet quietly, grabbing your phone on the way, dialing the number of the first person you thought of as you close your closet door, hiding yourself behind some of your clothes.

“It’s late, sweetheart. I wonder what you could be calling me for…” Rocker teases softly once he answers your call, a smirk on his face.

“Rocker,” you whisper, almost inaudible, tears welling up in your eyes as the gravity of your situation suddenly becomes quite clear.

He tenses as he hears the fear in your voice, standing up from his spot on the couch, jaw clenched.

“Sweetheart, what is it?” he whispers, grabbing his keys and gun, jogging out to his truck, phone wedged between his ear and his shoulder as he unlocks the door, climbing in.

“The cartel, they’re in my apartment.” you whisper, putting a hand over your mouth to stifle your breathing as you hear one pair of footsteps growing closer to your room. 

“I’m on my way. Where are you exactly? How many of them are there? Do you have a weapon?” he asks, his voice hard, as he starts to drive, weaving through traffic as he drives well above the speed limit, trying not to imagine what they might do to you if they find you.

“In my closet. There’s two of them. I don’t have anything.” you whisper, shrinking further back into your closet, mind racing to figure out how and why they found you.

Suddenly, it hits you. You didn’t log out of your computer when you left work. You had a program open, the same one you used to find the cartel leader, trying to track down some of the higher ups in the cartel that got away, when you noticed it was time for you to go home. While that program is good, it’s dangerous, and with the right training, the people you’re trying to find can find you as well. Leaving it open meant they had more time to track you down, finding your name, your job, and your address. 

“Stay on the phone with me, baby. I’ll be there in 2 minutes. If they find you and try to take you out of your apartment, I need you to fight. I’ll get to you, I promise. Just buy me some time.” he explains, listening to your ragged breathing over the phone, picturing the fear etched onto your face as you hide in your closet.

All of a sudden, he hears your closet door open and a stifled scream as your phone falls to the floor. The two men grab you, pulling you out of the closet as one slaps a hand over your mouth.

“Got you, you stupid bitch. You thought you could get our boss arrested and we wouldn’t track you down?” Rocker hears over the phone, his whole body tensing as he pulls into your apartment complex’s parking lot. He throws it in park, not bothering to kill the engine as he runs inside, gun in hand.

You thrash in their grip, trying to break free as one holds onto you, the other aiming a gun at your head.

“Struggling is pointless, darling. We’ve got a job to do. Now, you’re gonna tell us everything you found out about us, and we might just let you live.” the one with the gun spits at you, eyes never leaving yours as he smirks. He waves the gun at the man holding you, signaling him to take his hand away from your mouth.

“You don’t have to do this. I didn’t find anything. Just where your boss was hiding, and he was caught. That’s all I know, I swear.” you lie, trying not to look at the door. They didn’t seem to notice your phone before you dropped it, so you hoped if you didn’t do anything to make it look like you were waiting for someone to show up, Rocker might have the element of surprise on his side. 

“Bullshit. You’re gonna tell us, or we’re gonna make sure that your death is extra long, and extra painful. Did you see the way we torture people while doing your research? It’s not something you want,” the man with the gun says angrily, the sound of him cocking the gun ringing in your ears, making you flinch.

As you’re about to reply, you hear two gunshots. You shut your eyes tightly, a high pitched noise escaping your throat. Rocker steps into the room after taking down the man with the gun, gun raised at the man still holding onto you tightly, a new sense of urgency in him as he notices the red spot growing on your shirt. You open your eyes once you feel the sharp pain in your side, knees growing weak at the feeling. You make eye contact with Rocker as he stands in front of you, his eyes quickly looking down as he bends to grab the man’s gun and puts it in his waistband, keeping his own pointed at the man behind you. 

“Duck,” he says to you quickly, noticing the man’s grip on you faltering as the realization of what just happened crosses his face.

You drop to the floor quickly, hand moving to your side, trying to put pressure on the gunshot wound, flinching as you hear another gunshot, keeping your eyes to the ground. You hear the man behind you drop to the floor, and almost immediately after, you feel Rocker’s hands on you, forcing you to lay down on your back, grabbing your hands and forcing them to cover your wound. When the man with the gun went down, his finger was still on the trigger, sending a rogue bullet into your abdomen as he fell.

“Baby, where’s your phone?” he asks, a sense of urgency in his voice.

“Dropped it when they grabbed me,” you whisper, breath quickening as the searing pain in your side grows.

He quickly runs to your room, grabbing your phone, dialing 911 as he races back over to you, moving your hands gently before using his own hands to cover your wound, trying to slow the bleeding. You wince, crying out softly as he applies pressure, growing dizzy as he gives the 911 operator your address. 

“Stay with me, sweetheart, you gotta keep your eyes open, yeah?” he whispers to you as your vision gets blurry, your eyes blinking slowly, fighting to keep them open.

“Look at me, baby. Let me see those pretty eyes.” he says louder, hands still pressing your wound, watching as your eyes flutter closed, the sound of sirens getting closer.

“Come on, don’t do this to me. Open your eyes, baby,” is the last thing you hear, the pain subsiding as everything goes black.

You wake up to the sound of beeping, wincing softly as you open your eyes, blinded for a moment by the fluorescent lights shining brightly over you.

You hear a loud exhale from beside you, someone’s grip tightening on your hand as your vision comes into focus. You look over, seeing your brother sitting beside you in a hospital chair, a worried look on his face.

“Jesus Christ, you scared the hell out of me, we didn’t know if you’d make it.” Street whispers, standing up to kiss your forehead softly. 

You look up at him, swallowing as you try to sit up, wincing louder.

“No, no, Stay there. You were shot. You have to rest. I’ll go get everyone, they’re all waiting in the lobby.” Street says, letting go of your hand and walking to the doorway, waving everyone in.

You look to the door as Chris, Hondo, Tan, Luca, Deacon, and Rocker walk in, looks of relief on their faces.

They all take their turns of saying how glad they were that you’re okay as you smile weakly at them, eyes glancing to Rocker as he makes his way over, jaw clenched and hands in his pockets, refusing to look you in the eyes. A look of sadness fills your eyes as you see him standing toward the back of the group, a hard look on his face as his eyes focus on where your wound is. You look back over at Chris as she tells you how glad she is that you’re okay, thanking her as you try to take your mind off of Rocker.

After a while, the team all look exhausted, and you tell them to go home and get some rest. They agree after much convincing and leave, while Street tells you that he’s staying whether you want him to or not. You laugh softly at his insistence, wincing as you feel a pain shoot up your spine, Rocker’s eyes immediately lock on yours, moving beside your bed as he glances down at where your gunshot wound was, before looking back up at your face, eyes softening.

You’re so caught up in Rocker’s presence that you don’t hear Street tell you that he’s going to grab some snacks, his sentence stopping short when he sees the way you and Rocker are looking at each other. He watches for a second before backing out of the room, letting you two have a moment, brows furrowed as he tries to figure out if the emotions he saw between you two were the product of his lack of sleep.

“Thank you,” you whisper to Rocker, turning your palm face up on the bed, moving it closer to him.

“Goddammit, sweetheart, you don’t have to thank me. Do you know what I’d do for you?” he says, sitting down in the chair Jim had pulled up to your bed, moving to cradle your hand between his own.

You let out a shaky breath at his words, chest feeling heavy as the weight of his words hit you. You’re unable to form words as you look up at him, the way he was looking at you expressing all the emotions he was feeling for you in this moment. The fear of possibly losing you. The adoration he felt for you. The guilt he felt for you being in this situation. He felt like it was his fault. He was the one that asked you to do some digging on the cartel.

“I don’t know what I would’ve done if I lost you. I kept thinking about what I might walk into, what they could’ve done to you. I know this cartel. The things they would’ve done if I didn’t get there in time,” he trails off, head dropping as his eyes fill with tears.

“Hey,” you whisper, reaching out to put your hand on top of the hand on top of yours, “I’m okay. You saved me. I’m right here.”

“You got shot, baby. Because of me.” he whispers looking back up at you, face red.

“I’m alive because of you. You saved me. I called you because I knew you’d save me.” you tell him, giving him a look that you hope conveys all the things you want to say to him, but are too scared to say.

He lets out a shaky breath, wiping away a tear that falls down his cheek as he nods.

“I’m never gonna let anything like this happen to you again,” he whispers. He leans down, kissing your hand softly before looking back up at you, holding eye contact.

After a moment you look down, face growing hot at his intense look. Leave it to Rocker to make you feel flustered even after being shot.

As you both sit in silence, your brother walks back in, stopping as he sees the way Rocker is staring at you, holding your hand in his.

Rocker quickly stands up, dropping your hand as he nods at Street, a hard expression making its way onto his face again.

“You got her?” Rocker asks Street, standing up straight as he crosses his arms over his chest.

Street nods, giving Rocker a ‘what the fuck’ look as Rocker starts walking towards the door.

“Get some sleep. I’ll be back in the morning, okay?” Rocker says in a much softer voice, looking over his shoulder to you as he gets to the door.

You nod, smiling softly, watching him until he’s out of sight. You look back over at Street as he clears his throat, looking at you with a raised brow.

“What the fuck?” Street whisper-yells, sitting down on the chair beside your bed as you look at him sheepishly.

“What?” you ask, looking down at your hands, fidgeting with them.

“I was a little confused on why you called him and not me, other than him living closer to you. But now I see why,” he tells you, leaning back in the chair, putting his feet up on the bed.

You sigh, shaking your head. “It’s nothing, Jim, I swear. I was helping him with that cartel today. I thought he was the best one to call since he’s more familiar with them.” you explain, biting the inside of your lip nervously, hoping he doesn’t try to call your bluff. 

“Right,” he mutters sarcastically, rolling his eyes, “I’m telling you, don’t get too attached, please. It’s his job, he did what he was trained to do.” he tells you, opening up the bag of chips he bought.

“Why do you hate him so much?” you ask, looking back over at him.

“I don’t hate him. I just know guys like him. Trust me, you don’t wanna date a cop.” he tells you, his focus going to the chips in his hand, offering the bag to you. You shake your head, sighing.

“You know guys like him; you don’t know him. He’s a good guy.” you argue softly. As much as you love your brother, he can be really overprotective of you. You’re generally very trusting, and a lot of the time, he feels the need to make sure you’re giving your trust to those who actually deserve it.

“I’m not saying he’s not a good guy, he’s just not good for you. He’s cocky, and arrogant, okay? I promise, the attraction will wear off soon.” he tells you as you roll your eyes.

“So, he’s like you?” you tease softly, not wanting to argue with him right now, still feeling weak.

“Exactly,” he teases back, shoving more chips into his mouth as you laugh softly, wincing. “Now, get some sleep. I’ll stay here with you tonight. Doctor says we can leave in the morning.” he tells you with his mouth full as you nod. You lay your head back on the pillow, sighing as you drift off to sleep.

The next morning, you wake up to Street’s snores, looking over to see him in an awkward looking position on the chair. You sigh, rolling your eyes, groaning softly as his snores echo through the room. You look over at the table beside your bed, reaching for your phone once you notice it. As the screen lights up you see a text from Rocker.

Rocker: I cleaned up your apartment. It’s all ready for you when you get discharged. And I set up some blankets on the couch. I’m staying there until we catch the rest of the cartel members, and I don’t wanna hear anything from you about how I don’t have to. I’m not letting this happen again.

You smile softly as you read the text, replying a quick ‘okay’ before setting your phone down, knowing that arguing would be pointless. A few minutes later, Street wakes up, looking over at you and smiling softly, sleep still in his eyes.

“Morning. How are you feeling?” he asks, closing his eyes again, yawning loudly.

“It still hurts a little, but these pain meds are helping,” you joke, sitting up slowly. “When can we go?”

“I’ll go get the doctor. She said we can leave today. We’ll probably just have to fill out some forms or something.” he tells you, standing up, stretching.

You nod as he walks out the door, smiling again as you think about Rocker’s text. As quick as your smile appears, it disappears. He’s staying at your house. For God knows how long. While his protectiveness has your heart beating loudly in your chest, it could also very much be credited to the nervousness you feel from having him in such close quarters.

Later that day, Rocker pulls into your apartment’s parking lot before jogging around to the other side of his truck, opening your door for you and grabbing your arms to help you get out. Rocker told Street he would drive you back to your apartment, Street hesitantly agreeing because he knew driving you home on his motorcycle wasn’t really an option. You thank Rocker softly, feeling two arms wrap around your waist, one Rocker and one Street’s, both of them trying to help you walk inside. 

“I got shot in the side, my legs still work,” you tell them softly, rolling your eyes at their focused expressions.

“Yeah. You got shot. And you’re gonna accept our help for the next few weeks until you heal.” Rocker says seriously, careful of your wound as they lead you to your apartment.

They guide you to your couch, sitting you down softly before backing up, making sure you’re still okay.

“Okay…I guess I’ll go…” Street says, looking between you and Rocker, noticing that Rocker wasn’t moving, feet firmly planted in the middle of your living room.

“And Rocker?” he says, eyes narrowing as they meet each other’s gaze, finger pointed at his chest, “Don’t fuck my sister.” 

Your jaw drops at his words, face growing hot as you look between them. Rocker’s reaction is similar to yours for a moment, before it’s quickly replaced by a neutral expression.

“She just got out of the hospital, Street. I’m not that big of a douchebag,” he says sarcastically, glancing over at you to give you a wink.

“I’m serious,” Street says, eyeing you.

“It’s not gonna happen, Jim, I promise. Thank you. I love you. I’ll be fine.” you tell him, your arms making a shooing motion.

He puts his hands up in surrender, backing up towards the door. Telling you he’ll check up on you later before leaving. 

It’s a long few weeks as you slowly recover, Rocker refusing to leave your side, keeping his word and sleeping on your couch every night. He talked to Hicks, both agreeing that a uniformed officer would stay outside your door while Rocker was at work, making sure nothing further happened to you.

It was hard to be in your apartment at first. Many nights involved waking up with tears in your eyes, clutching your side as you relived what had happened. Each time you woke up, Rocker was already at your side, shirtless and hair messy, hearing the sounds you made in your sleep. He would softly brush the hair out of your face, whispering that he was there, that he would protect you. If you weren’t so scared, you would’ve noticed his bare chest, and the soft look in his eyes as he calmed you down.

One day he came back to your apartment from work, a large grin on his face as he walked over to you sitting on the couch, kissing your forehead.

“We got them,” he tells you, “All of them. They’re all in prison. You’re safe.” 

“I was already safe, Rocker. You made sure of that as soon as I came home.” you tell him, smiling.

You had gotten used to his company. The longer he was there the less flustered you got around him, his presence only really affecting you when he really laid on the charm.

“Yeah, but now you really don’t have to worry about them again.” He says happily, sitting down beside you on the couch, leaning back as he lets out a long sigh, finally feeling a weight off his shoulders.

“I guess that means you can go home.” you say softly after a few moments of silence, sadness in your eyes. You had liked him before this happened, but now, your feelings have increased tenfold. And he felt the same. He loved coming home to you, making sure that you were okay, he didn’t wanna give that up. You both really didn’t want him to leave, but it made no sense for him to stay, and you both knew that.

“Yeah, I guess it does,” he says, a hint of sadness creeping into his voice as the realization hits him. “Hey, didn’t the doctor clear you for work? When are you going back?” he asks, trying to distract himself from the idea of leaving your apartment. 

“Mhm, I go back in 3 days. I’m excited to get back to it,” you tell him as he nods, eyes unfocused as he tries to burn the feeling of being in your apartment into his brain. Sitting on your couch with you, both comfortable in each other's presence.

“I’m gonna go make dinner. Pasta?” he asks after a few minutes pass, standing up and looking at you. You nod, smiling softly as he goes to the kitchen, sighing as you think of what it would be like to have him here all the time, not just when he feels the need to protect you from the cartel.

You walk into SWAT headquarters with a smile on your face, waving at your coworkers as you pass them, happy to finally be back. Making your way to your office, Street jogs up to you, lightly putting an arm around your shoulders, still wary of your wound, even though it has pretty much healed by now. 

“Glad you’re back, sis. I was gonna throw you a welcome back party, but Rocker said you’d kill me,” he teases, squeezing your shoulder lightly.

“And he was right. I’m glad you didn’t,” you tell him, fighting back a smile as you both walk into your office, sitting down. 

As you and Street continue talking, Rocker walks in, a smile on his face once his eyes land on you.

“It’s good to see you back in here, sweetheart.” he says, winking, leaning up against the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest.

“You need something, Rocker?” you tease, turning to look at him, giving him a smile.

“As much as I’d love your help on this new case, I’m not asking you for anything else. I’m not putting you at risk again.” he tells you seriously.

“I told you, it wasn’t your fault, it was my mistake. I’ll help with anything you need, you know that.” you tell him, matching his tone.

“Not taking any chances. Now I’ll just be in here to catch up, tell you how pretty you look,” he says, smirking as his eyes scan your soft frame.

Your face grows hot as you look down, fighting back a smile. 

“Get back to work, Rocker.” you say softly, turning your chair back to Street, hearing Rocker say a quick goodbye before walking to the locker room. 

“Maybe I was wrong about him,” Street whispers, looking over at you, smiling softly as he notices the way Rocker’s words are affecting you, “He’s a good guy for you.”

“Yeah?” you ask in disbelief, your eyes widen as he says this, lips parting in surprise.

“Yeah. He really cares about you. He stayed with you for weeks to make sure you were okay. I thought that maybe he was just flirting with you for fun, that he was just leading you on. But he clearly likes you,” he tells you sincerely, hand coming up to rest on your shoulder. “I give you my blessing.” he jokes, patting your shoulder gently.

Your laugh, raising a brow. “Your blessing? I didn’t realize this was the 1800s,” you tease.

“Yeah, but I know you were holding back because of what I said. I don’t think you should.” he tells you, standing up from the chair beside yours, slowly walking towards the door. “Tell him how you feel!” he says loudly, winking at you. He turns, walking away, leaving you alone in your office laughing softly.

You think for a moment, biting your lip as you try to figure out what to do. You can’t just tell him you like him. Sure, you let him flirt with you, and sometimes you muster up enough courage to say something flirty back, but you can’t tell him. The thought of him rejecting you was too much, and even if you knew he wanted you, you’d still be too scared to say the words.

Little did you know, Street had left your office and went to find Rocker, which led to a weird conversation about you and Rocker’s relationship, and Street’s “blessing.” 

You tense as you hear a knock on your door that night, slowly making your way to your door. You sigh in relief as you see Rocker through the peephole, opening the door and motioning him to come inside with a small smile on your face.

“What are you doing here?” you ask as he comes in, running a hand through his hair as he turns to face you. You shut the door, spinning around to look up at him, brows furrowing as you see what you swear is nervousness on his face.

“Do you want me?” he asks quickly. He had written a whole speech in his head on the drive over, but now that he was standing in front of you, that’s all he could say.

“What?” you whisper, not knowing what else to say, feeling your heartbeat quicken and breath catch in your throat.

“God, I’ve wanted you for so long. Do you know how much it hurts to see you every day at work? Not able to do anything but stare at you? Flirt with you? But only when I needed something, because Street would skin me alive if I did anything more than that? God, you drive me crazy.” he tells you, stepping closer to you, your back almost touching your front door as you stand there, stunned.

“I-” you whisper, trailing off, letting out a shaky exhale as his gaze burns holes into you, feeling the heat radiating off of him

“Just say yes. Please,” he practically begs, hands clenched at his sides, fighting the urge to pull you into him and run his hands down your body.

“Yes,” you breathe out, immediately feeling his hands grip your hips, pulling you into a rough kiss as your hands move up to his chest.

You whine slightly as he pushes you backwards, your back hitting your front door, your arms quickly moving to wrap around his neck. One of his hands moves up to your jaw, tilting your head up more as he deepens the kiss, his hips slowly grinding into you, forcing a moan out of your mouth.

He smiles into the kiss as you moan, the hand holding your jaw trailing back down your body, moving both hands to the backs of your thighs.

“Jump,” he whispers against your mouth, bending down slightly.

“Don’t wanna crush you,” you whisper, pulling back from his lips, looking up at him, breathing heavily.

“Sweetheart, look at me. I’ll be fine.” he teases softly, a cocky expression on his face. Not wanting to wait for you to jump, he instead roughly grabs your thighs, pulling one of your legs up to rest on his hip before forcing your other foot off the ground, wrapping your other leg around his waist as you shift your weight.

You squeal softly, giggling as he lifts you up, your back hitting the wall again. He wastes no time in finding your lips again, pressing against you as his hands squeeze your thighs.

Your hands find his hair, weaving through them as you kiss him back, tightening your legs around his waist. He can’t get enough of you. The feeling of your thick thighs wrapped around his waist, how they feel in his hands. The way your chest and tummy feel against him. How your lips feel against his.

Suddenly, one of his hands travels up your back, pulling you off the wall as he turns, before it trails back down to the back of your thigh. 

You pull back from his lips as he moves, turning to look at where he’s going. You bite your lip as he makes his way to your bedroom.

“I’ve been waiting a long time to do this, sweetheart.” he whispers in your ear, placing a soft kiss under your ear before throwing you on the bed.

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[dancingtotuyo]

High Infidelity Part IV

Joel Miller x Female Reader

Rating: Mature Explicit

Summary: Joel goes on a date.

Tags: Tommy x Reader, Joel x Reader, Tommy's Wife Reader, infidelity, emotional affair, slow burn (as much as you can get for 5 chapters), Tommy goes to jail, Reader has had a child

Warnings: pining, jealousy, masturbation (male and female), voyeurism, self loathing, emotional affair, boundaries crossed

Notes: Things are getting a little spicy hehe. As usual, shout out to my beta readers @janaispunk and @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin (special shout out to Ang for the ✨spicy✨ idea 😜) and @saradika-graphics for the dividers!

Words: 4818

Series Masterlist | Author Masterlist | Daily Clicks for Palestine & Other resources

When Joel asks you to watch Sarah on Friday night, you don’t hesitate to say yes. Then, two minutes later you call him back and ask why. You’re surprised when he tells you he has a date. You should tease him, nag for details, but it’s none of your business. You find yourself wanting to know everything and nothing.

Joel is a grown-ass man. A single man at that, but it nags at you. Who is she? Where did he meet her? The two of you spend most of your free time together. In the six years you’ve known Joel, you can’t remember him ever mentioning a woman. 

His sole focus has always been Sarah. You suppose Tommy is on that list too, and Nathaniel. The two of you have matching worry lines thanks to your husband, and you guess by default you’re on the list too. If there’s one thing Joel Miller is committed to, it’s family.

Joel comes down in dark-wash jeans and a simple button-down. You didn’t know he owns jeans that nice, hugging his thighs, leather belt cinched at his waist. Your eyes rake over him perhaps a moment longer than needed. He hadn’t looked that nice at your and Tommy’s courthouse wedding. 

You raise an eyebrow letting out a low whistle as he enters the kitchen. “Lucky lady.” You take a bite from your apple slice. You point the paring knife at his jeans. “Those new?”

Joel knits his eyebrows together. “No. Why?”

“I’ve never seen them before.”

“You keep tabs on my closet?”

“We’ve basically lived together for 3 years. You wear the same two pairs of work jeans and five ratty T-shirts in rotation. I wouldn’t be surprised if your shirts have the days of the week labeled on the inside.”

“Church clothes.”

You scowl. “We don’t go to church.”

“Speak for yourself, Darlin.” He chuckles, checking his watch, the one you gave him for Father’s Day. You shoot him a suspicious look. “The kids out back?”

“Yup.” You say, taking another bite of apple. 

Joel’s fingertips brush across your shoulders as he passes by, the warmth of his cologne fills your nostrils as he rushes out. A pit settles deep in your stomach. You’re not sure where it stems from, but you don’t like it. You feel uneasy. 

The back door shuts just as a tap on the front door echoes through the house. You sigh, not really wanting to answer it. The pit grows and you still don’t understand where it’s coming from. Sarah and Nathaniel’s muted laughter filters through as you open the door. 

She’s pretty you think. Not someone you consider to be a show-stopper, but exactly what you would picture Joel going for. There’s something almost familiar about her. She looks taken aback when you open the door. You plaster your well-practiced Southern hospitality smile on your face. 

“I’m Joel’s sister-in-law. Just here to watch the kids.” You hold out your hand. Relief floods her features.  

“Tracy.” She takes your hand.

“Nice to meet you.” You can’t shake the nagging air of familiarity about her. It itches your brain, hanging on the tip of your tongue. Have you seen her at parent pick-up before? “Joel should be back soon. He’s just saying goodnight.”

Tracy nods, clutch held tight in both hands. Maybe it makes you an asshole, but you don’t invite her in, forcing her to stand at the threshold of an open door. She wears a solid dress. Her makeup is tasteful and leagues ahead of anything you’d ever be able to pull off, especially with a rowdy toddler. 

For a second you miss it. The freedom that is. You wouldn’t give up Nathaniel for the world. Hell, you wouldn’t give up Tommy for the world even with the shit you’re going through, but the ability to go out at a moment’s notice and let the alcohol loosen your inhibitions, you miss that. Tracy couldn’t be much older than you. Maybe a year or two. Did you go to high school together? Is that why she looks familiar? 

There’d been a couple Tracys in your small high school, but none that look like her. 

“You have a son, right?” Tracy says. You nod. She smiles as if proud of herself for remembering the fact. “Joel mentioned that you two do a lot together- with his brother being in prison.”

“Yeah, we do.” Your shoulders stiffen and your smile tightens. So this wasn’t their first date. They knew each other well enough for Joel to divulge your business like it was front-page news. Though, you suppose it had made the paper. 

“Well, I got them both riled up for ya,” Joel says, walking through the house. He plays with the cuffs of his shirt before looking up. He seems startled to find the door wide open and Tracy on the other side. “Oh- Hi.”

“Hi,” Tracy laughs.

He looks between the two of you like he’s seen a ghost. You cross your arms, a faint smirk playing across your lips. “Just remember payback’s a bitch.”

“Yeah... I don’t doubt it.” Joel almost mutters it under his breath. He joins Tracy on the other side of the threshold, pressing a distracted kiss to her cheek. “You ready to go?”

You catch the weirdness of Joel’s demeanor, familiar with all of his tendencies by now. You raise an eyebrow in question, but Joel won’t look you in the eye. His arm wraps around Tracy’s waist, pushing her toward his pickup. 

“Make yourself at home.” Joel throws his hand up in a wave despite his back being turned to you. 

“Always do!” You call back. 

You watch them until the truck is out of the driveway, confusion written across your face as you process the odd interaction. Why was Joel acting so weird- like you weren’t supposed to meet the mysterious lady he’d obviously been out with more than once, and why hadn’t he told you yet? And why did she look so damn familiar?

The moment the door clicks behind you, it hits. You freeze. The familiarity in her face is one you see every time you look in the mirror. She’s not your twin by any means, but Tracy could be your cousin, your sister even. Something you can’t place settles in your gut.

The kids are finally asleep. The TV drones on, but you don’t hear a sound of it. The whole interaction plays on repeat in your mind. You chew on your thumbnail. You can’t stop thinking about them, where they are, and what they might be doing. 

You glance down at your watch. 10:30. You don’t typically go to bed this early, and you’re not tired, but you can’t get it off your mind. Sleep is your only option for relief. 

Checking on the kids, you slip into Joel’s room. You’ve stayed in here more times than you can count as Joel always insists you stay in his bed. It’s automatic how you pull one of his shirts from the drawer. Not one of his five shitty work shirts but one of the well-worn ones he wears on the weekend after he showers. They’re soft. They smell like him, sawdust and old spice, not the cologne you caught on him this evening. You slip under the cool sheets, stretching out your bare legs and burying your face in his pillow. You’re surrounded by him here. 

You thought it would turn off the thoughts, silence your mind, but it doesn’t. If anything they ramp up. You know there’s no way Joel’s had her here. He wouldn’t bring a strange woman into his home, Sarah’s home, that quickly. No, it’s all him in here… and you. 

It’s just after eleven. You’re not asleep. Joel’s not home and your mind is running through the memories as it often does when you lay alone. You’ve spent more nights alone than with someone since you got married. You should be used to it, but you’re not. There should be someone next to you right now. 

Tossing and turning, an idea sparks in your mind. There’s one surefire way to get yourself to sleep. The mere thought sets desire through your veins. Goosebumps prickle your flesh. Your nipples perk up under Joel’s soft shirt. It’s been a while since you’ve touched yourself. 

Kicking the blankets off of you, you let your fingers skim over your bare thighs, moving them upward until your shirt is tucked under your breasts. Joel’s shirt. It has you pausing. This crosses so many lines. You can’t do this here, in your brother-in-law’s bed, in Joel’s bed where it smells like him. Where it feels like him. 

Your cunt clenches and a soft groan escaped from your lips. You’ve barely touched yourself, not enough for that response. Your heart rate refuses to calm down, the flame of desire already spreading from deep in your stomach. You shouldn’t do this, not here, but your fingers trace up and over your sternum again, slipping under Joel’s shirt. You brush your thumb over the hardened buds. You’ll change the sheets tomorrow. He’ll never know. 

A soft moan tumbles over your lips. Your body moves of its own volition, pressing into your touch. Your hands move down and across your skin. You run them over your favorite places to be touched, everywhere except where you want to be touched the most. You avoid it, waiting until your panties start to cling to you, excess moisture soaking into them. A finger runs over the seam of your lower lips. Another moan falls from your mouth, hips bucking up. 

You push down your panties, flinging them off once they hit your ankles. Your fingers slip between your folds. You’re slick, spreading it up and down, over and around your clit as need builds in your body. Another moan threatens to fall from your mouth, each one growing in volume. You bite down on the collar of Joel’s shirt. Another whiff of him overtakes you. Your cunt clenches as you finally slip a finger in and then a second. 

The house is dark when Joel gets back. He feels like a dick. He’d been distracted the whole time. He saw it the moment he spotted the two of you together- the resemblance. He felt like an idiot for not seeing it sooner, and even more when he couldn’t stop thinking about you the whole night. There’s nothing wrong with Tracy. She’s perfectly nice, but the bubble has popped. She’s not you. He won’t be seeing her again.

It doesn’t help that he knew he’d come home to a dark house. He knows you’re asleep in his bed right now in one of his shirts, and Lord help him, it kept him distracted all night. 

He’s quiet as he walks up the stairs so as to not wake you or the kids. He stares at his bedroom door, taunting him. You’re in there and he knows what you feel like sound asleep in his arms. You haven’t talked that night. In fact, you’ve acted like it never happened and he’s followed suit. He wonders if he could slip behind you now. If you would let him hold you. 

He lets out a long sigh, fighting with himself. He needs to slip in, grab a pair of sweats, but he’s not sure if he’ll be able to pull himself out. He can sleep in his boxers, maybe find some sweats in the laundry. His hand drops from the door. 

He’s going to walk away. He’s not going to cross that line again. That’s his brother’s wife. The woman Tommy told him to take care of. He has to stop this. He can’t- and then he hears it. Soft and quiet at first. A soft gasp that hitches, like it got caught on something. 

He freezes. It’s probably nothing, a dream, his imagination. Then he hears it again, this time pitched lower, like it comes from a deeper place. He can’t discount that one. As much as his brain screams at him to go, run, his feet stay anchored to the floor. He’s desperate to hear it again, and he’s rewarded with another moan. 

They’re intentional. You’re doing that to yourself in his bed. He bites his lip, hand falling to the door frame to stabilize him. He shouldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t be envisioning you spread out on his bed, toes curling against his sheets. The blood rushes straight to his cock and Joel knows he’s about to cross a line he can’t come back from. 

Another moan comes out of the room. He flips open the button of his jeans, hand slipping beneath the waistband stroking his already hard cock. Maybe it makes him a creep, but he’s never been more grateful for the thin walls in the house. 

Your noises of pleasure grow. Joel bites back his own, nails digging into the door frame. Precum leaks from the tip of his dick. He catches the way your moans grow more desperate as you take yourself closer. He works himself to the edge with you, wanting to hold off until you’re there. 

You’re so close to falling over the edge. Your fingers glide over your clit with ease, soaked with your slick. You’ve been pushing the images away the whole time, trying not to go there, but the closer you pull yourself to bliss, the harder it is to keep them at bay. Your eyes drift shut as you lean into the feeling, willing yourself over the edge. They flash in your mind, pictures of him over you, calloused hands running over your bare body, his deep baritone in your ear as he pulls you apart. The tension between your thighs breaks free. You don’t realize how loud you cry out, ears ringing with pleasure as his name effortlessly rolls off your lips. 

You lay there, still, chest heaving. Not Tommy’s name. Joel’s. 

Before you have time to comprehend what just happened, it breaks through the silence. A soft, bitten back moan on the other side of the door in a tone you can only recognize as his and the faint whispers of your name. Your eyes widen. Had he…? 

Your brain races with the possibilities as you lay bare, tshirt pushed above your breasts. He could walk in. You hadn’t locked the door. You could open the door to him, take his hand, invite him into his own bed. 

You cringe. When did you become this person? The one who lusts after another man while married? As much as you’re ashamed, you fight against the temptation. You want to give in. You want to be touched and desired again. You’d seen it in Joel’s eyes that night at the beach. He would give you what you needed. Before you can make a decision, you hear the steps creak. He’s walked away. 

You let out a deep breath, not sure if you’re disappointed or relieved. You roll over, burying your  head in Joel pillow, wrapping yourself in his comforter, cunt still slick and dripping. 

Lucky for Joel, he’s able to find clean sweats in the dryer and then starts the washer with his jeans and boxers, washing away all evidence of his sins. 

He settles on the couch with just the decorative pillow and throw blanket. It’s hot anyway so the blanket is quickly kicked to his feet. He can’t put it out of his mind. Any of it. You. 

He tries not to think about the sounds you made in his bed, the things you did. He tries not to think about you asleep in his arms, but with all things, the more you try not to think about them, the more you do. 

Joel has accepted that he’s not a good man. His intentions with you are no longer pure, but self seeking. Yes, he cares for you and your well being, but he wants you. He needs you near him. He needs you to realize he’s been here through it all. That Tommy has done nothing to be worthy of you. Joel has spent more of your marriage being your husband than Tommy has. 

He clenches his fists. Anger surges through him. Joel doesn’t care if it makes him a bad person. If he had a way to go and turn back time, he would. He’d find a way to meet you before Tommy did. He would make you his. He would save you from the heartache of being Tommy’s wife. You would be his Mrs. Miller. 

Joel wishes he’d kissed you at the beach. He wanted to. God knows how badly he’d wanted to. It took every last ounce of self control not to. His stores are depleted. Between that and tonight, Joel has no more restraint to offer this situation. If you ever give him the chance again, he won’t hold back. He doesn’t care that you’re married to his brother. You deserve better. You deserve the world. Joel believes he can give it to you. 

You both sleep better than you have in weeks. 

“I never understood back to school nights,” Joel grumbles, stuffing a store bought chocolate chip cookie in his mouth and washing it down with cheap faculty room coffee. “Want some?”

“You know I don’t drink caffeine after two.” 

Joel shrugs, taking another sip. “It’s not that good anyway.” 

You roll your eyes. “What about back to school nights makes you grumpy? It’s a chance for Sarah to see where she’ll spend most of her time for the next nine months.”

“Then where is she?” Joel raises an eyebrow. “Out on the playground because it only takes 5 seconds to see the classroom and she’d rather play with her friends.”

“You’re a grump.”

“Yeah, a grump who’d rather be watching the game.” 

You roll your eyes, swatting his shoulder. “Have you at least talked to her teacher yet?”

He grimaces. “Haven’t worked up the courage yet.”

It isn’t that Joel doesn’t want to know the person responsible for educating his child. It’s the fact that Sarah has a knack for ending up with the young, single teachers as her educators, ones who seem very interested in her father as more than a parent. He’d been granted reprieve last year, but you’d caught the visible shudder in his frame the moment he’d laid eyes on Sarah’s teacher for the year, young and not a ring on her left hand in sight. 

“Stop judging a book by its cover. You’re a grown up.”

“Fine.” He sets down his coffee with determination. “Let’s go.” His hand finds your waist as he propels you both toward the teacher. 

“What are you doing?” Your eyebrows knit together. You have a sneaking suspicion you know what he’s playing at. 

“We’re going to meet Sarah’s teacher.” He shrugs, but a smile plays at the corners of his mouth. “Mrs. Miller.”

Your stomach does little flips. You’ve been mistaken for his Mrs. Miller more times than you can count at this point. You’ve attended Sarah’s parent teacher conferences when Joel got held up at a job sight, letting the teachers assume whatever they wanted. You are Mrs. Miller after all. But you’ve never done anything like this, not alongside him.  

He introduces himself and you to Miss Holly as he tugs you in closer to his right side. Your left arm instinctively wraps around his middle and you see the moment she watches the glint of your engagement and wedding ring under the fluorescent lights. 

It’s hardly the first time you’ve been mistaken for Joel Miller’s wife, but it is the first time he’s played into the assumption on purpose, with confidence. It’s the first time you let your mind forget it’s not true, even for just a few seconds, playing a part that doesn’t feel like playing at all. Joel lets his southern charm show now, protected by the guise of you as his bride. Before you know it, it feels too natural. Joel’s hand falls a bit, grasping your hip, tugging you closer like it’s the most natural thing in the world. You think maybe it is.  

Joel leads the conversation. You’re too caught up in the feel of his hand on your hip and the breathing of his chest under your palm. The night you almost kissed, the night you crawled into his bed and he held you through some of the best sleep you’ve gotten in years flashes in your mind. You think back to just last week, his name on your lips, that strangled, soft moan, and your own name you swear you heard. 

“It was nice meeting you, Mr. and Mrs. Miller,” Sarah’s teacher says, pulling you from your thoughts. 

Joel offers his own goodbyes and you echo them, still fighting the haze inside your own mind. You wonder if there’s a world where this is your life, one where you and Joel aren’t playing make believe. One where you crawl in bed beside him every night instead of your empty bed. It’s an awful thought. Your husband gets released from prison in a few weeks. These thoughts will be gone by then. They have to be.

It was one night of indiscretion, two at the most, and you never actually did anything. You didn’t know Joel was on the other side of that door. Tommy doesn’t need to know. By his own admission, he’s actually crossed those boundaries. He’s broken your wedding vows. You glance at Joel’s profile as he leads you out of the classroom, a proud smirk on his face. The bastard enjoyed that way too much. 

When you make it to the hall, his fingers lace through yours. Is he forgetting too? Giving himself a moment to linger in the unspoken what ifs that seem to crowd around you these days. 

He drops your hand once you’re outside in view of the playground. He waves Sarah over, but you stay a couple steps behind, deep in thought until someone calls your name. Your head snaps in their direction. Julia and Micky Hall stand before you. Your eyes widen in recognition. Micky was one of Tommy’s Army buddies. They’d moved to Dallas after the group came back from their deployment. 

“Hi,” the words fall from your mouth in shock. “I didn’t know y’all were back in Austin.” Your feet carry you toward the couple. 

“Just moved back last month,” Julia says as you move to hug her and then Micky. “We’ve been meaning to call.”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s just good to see you both.” The smile across your face is genuine as you talk to your friends. You’d grown apart since their move. Other than Joel, Julia had been your closest friend during Tommy’s deployment. “How have you been? The boys?”

“Starting first grade,” Julia grins, pointing to her twin boys on the playground.

Your eyes catch them, running around. “They’ve grown so much.”

“How’s Nathaniel?” Julia asks.

“Good, growing like a weed as I’m sure you’re familiar with.”

“Too familiar,” Julia laughs. 

“Nathaniel isn’t going into Kindergarten, is he?” Micky asks.

“Next year. I came for Sarah’s back to school night. Joel’s daughter.” You point to where Sarah is just rushing over to her father. You feel the ghost of Joel’s touch when you utter his name. “We’ve been helping each other out a lot with everything.”

The couple nods, an awkward silence forming between you as if they don’t want to address the elephant in the room. The heat has let up a little bit as the sun begins to dip behind the trees. 

“I’ve written to Tommy a couple of times,” Micky says, hands tucked into his front pockets. “Haven’t heard back much.”

You force a nod, feeling the tension grow in your limbs. “I haven’t been able to get much from him.” 

You catch the way both their eyes widen. They were there the night you and Tommy met. They’d seen the way you fell, both of you. How inseparable your bond is, or was. 

“Shit,” Micky says, running a hand over his face. “How are you holding up?”

“Not sure I am most days. Joel’s been a big help to us.” It feels like you’re concealing the whole truth. Joel’s been the crutch keeping you going most days. Julia’s brow furrows with concern.

Micky nods. “I’d like to go see him if that’s okay.”

“Of course. Maybe you can get through to him.”

“And we should get the kids together,” Julia adds. “Catch up ourselves.”

“That would be nice,” you smile at her as you catch Joel and Sarah waiting by the truck, laughing about something. “I should go, but you should call. Number’s still the same.”

“I’ll use it.” Julia smiles as you wave at both of them before crossing the parking lot with a weird feeling in your gut.  

Seeing Julia and Micky was nice. It brought back a lot of good memories. The four of you. It’s another reminder of how lonely the last years have been. How much you’ve depended on Joel. How much he’s been there. 

As you join Joel and Sarah at the truck, Sarah catches you up on all her friend’s summer vacations and updates, mouth moving a million miles a minute. She doesn’t stop as you climb in or for the click of your seat belt. You stay quiet, watching Austin wiz by out the passenger side window. 

When Joel pulls into your driveway, you let out a sigh staring at the door. He leans over the center console, keeping his voice low.  “You okay, Darlin? You’ve been quiet since we left.”

“Just tired. I’ll see y’all tomorrow.” You fling the door of the pick up open. 

“Darlin?”

You bristle, smoothing out your skirt as you turn to face him. His brows knit together. “I’m fine, Joel.”

“You’re coming over tomorrow, right Aunt Bonnie?”

“Of course, Sarah Bear.” You blow her a kiss, shutting the door before Joel can protest. He makes sure you’re inside before pulling out of the driveway. 

Nathaniel is already asleep thanks to an afternoon at the playground and the magic your sitter works. You pay her extra tonight. You’ve never been more thankful to come home to a sleeping child, too distracted by the run in with your friends and Joel’s hot hands on you, the way he held you as if to tell the world to back off, you’re his. 

You pull the bottle of Tequila out of the cabinet. You’re tempted to pull straight from the bottle but you pour a finger or so into a glass instead. Your mother raised you better than that. She also raised you better than to pine after your brother in law. 

You throw back the whole glass. The cheap liquor burns your throat. You ran out of the good stuff last week with Joel and hadn’t made it to the liquor store yet. Joel had drunk you under the table, your tolerance not what it used to be. Not that you had ever been able to keep up with him. You fill the glass with another finger and toss it back. You can’t think about Joel. Can’t think about the way your wedding bands burn against your skin as if they are punishing you for tonight, for last week, for Father’s Day and for everything else. 

You pour more tequila into the cup, but you add ice and margarita mixer this time, knowing the first two shots will catch up to you soon enough. You fall onto the couch with a sigh. Three weeks. Just three weeks and Tommy will be back. You won’t see Joel everyday. Your husband will take care of you, satisfy you. That’s all this is. The deprivation of the last two and a half years. You can make it three more weeks. 

You try to reason it away. It makes sense. You and Joel have been so close in all this. He’s been your partner, not your husband, but partner. He’s an attractive man, thoughts were bound to pop up, lines were bound to get blurry, but all will correct itself when Tommy’s home. Yes, it all makes perfect sense. 

You take a sip of the margarita. Condensation trickles down your hand and ice rattles in the glass. Even as the numbness of the tequila shots begins to take over your body, the reassurances feel weak. 

Even if you can’t admit it, something has shifted. You and Joel are playing with fire. 

Three more weeks you push. Tommy will be home. You’ll have Your Tommy back. 

But you can’t erase the last two and a half years. Tonight, with the ghost of his hands on your body, you remember all the ways Joel has been there for you over these past years, filling in the gaping caverns Tommy left.   

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