#hehe hoooo
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daydark4k · 2 years ago
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The wires got the best of him, all that he invested in goes straight to hell
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allmyandroids · 4 months ago
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vestaclinicpod · 9 months ago
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I think everyone should give a huge round of applause to Kamen for being the first to finish their season two recordings 🏆✨
Dakarai has some absolutely cracking lines this season and it has been SO much fun recording them together!! 💛
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flower-boi16 · 1 year ago
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Why Stolitz is Helluva Boss's Worst Plotline
I don't know how to start this post so I'll just get to the point; Stolitz sucks complete ass and is the worst part of the show. It used to be interesting in season 1 but no longer in season 2, here's why.
1. Stolitz in season 1 (and why it worked)
Let's establish the reason why Stolitz worked in season 1. As we all know, Stolitz is a toxic relationship, it always has been. Stolas only wanted to sleep with Blitz and nothing else, to get all sexual with him and stuff....
And that's why it worked, Stolitz was in an intentionally toxic relationship, and the show treated it as such as seen in Ozzie's, where Blitz tells Stolas he doesn't want to sleep with him anymore. This was an interesting conflict and a lot of people were excited to see where season 2 would take Stolitz going forward after this. How was it going to resolve this conflict? There was a lot of potential...that season 2 has completely destroyed.
2. The Circus Ruins Everything (and here's why)
Now we move onto the season 2 premiere, The Circus, and hooo boy this is where the problems with this relationship begin to show themselves, as we encounter the first problem with Stolitz; Viv trying to retcon her way out of making Stolitz not toxic. The Circus makes the bizarre writing choice of making Blitz and Stolas childhood friends...
This writing decision sucks ass, here's why. Ok, first of all, let's get this out of the way first; this is a retcon. Stolas and Blitz being childhood friends and Stolas loving Blitz all along does not at all line up with any of their interactions throughout season 1, the point of their relationship in season 1 was that Stolas was the only part of Blitzo that Stolas was interested in was his dick and nothing else, this ignores that in favor of painting Blitz and Stolas as UwU childhood friends while forgetting all of their interactions in season 1.
Second of all, it's entirely unnecessary. Nothing about Blitz and Stolas's dynamic changes if you remove this and just have them fall in love as adults. Third, as a previous anon had already pointed out, making Blitz and Stolas childhood friends actually makes Stolas look worse because he's treating his childhood friend like a sex toy rather than a person. We'll get to this later but a major problem with Stolitz is the fact that the show tries to portray Stolas as the UwU sad soft boy victim and ignore how he treats Blitz in favor of making him and UwU soft boy.
The Circus is merely the beginning of that; the show is now starting to try and retcon its way out of making Stolitz not toxic by portraying as a UwU sweet childhood friendship all the while forgetting the actual point of the relationship to begin with. Don't worry, because hoooo boy let's talk about the next problem with Stolitz in season 2 that being...
3. The Feud in Ozzies (and its resolution)
So y'all would know that Stolas and Blitz had a fight at the end of Ozzies, right? Well this is where we enter the second problem with Stolitz; the events of Ozzie's go completely ignored. The next time Blitz and Stolas have an onscreen interaction is the second episode of season 2, Seeing Stars (Aka the only decent episode in this whole season). The two interact and...they just go along like nothing happened. As if they didn't have an argument at the end of season 1. People clearly noticed this and were confused as to why these two were just playing along as if the events of Ozzie's never happened...
Well guess what, episode 4, Western Energy, actually resolves the conflict the two had... off-screen...with a blink and you'll miss it text message. This was the moment I had officially lost my patience with this stupid season. It's just SO damn insulting. So you wanted to see where they could take this plotline after Ozzie's? How could Blitz and Stolas develop and resolve their conflict? Hehe well too fucking bad how about we just pretend that didn't happen and then resolve it with a fucking text message.
This is such a lazy and underwhelming way to resolve a conflict, it feels like Viv didn't know where to take Stolitz after season 1 so she just decided to give their feud an underwhelming resolution that unless you directly pause you would miss. So, the feud Blitz and Stolas had at the end of Ozzie's is completely forgotten about and then resolved off-screen, so fuck you to anybody who was excited to see where they went with this plot line I guess. Now that we have that out of the way...let's talk about the next problem with Stolitz;
4. Blitz's demonization
So season 1 ended with Blitz making it crystal clear to Stolas that he is deeply upset about their relationship only being about having sex with each other, so it's very clear that given how Stolas has been acting towards Blitz, he is the victim and Stolas is the abuser, so, therefore, Blitz is in the right for not loving Stolas given their interactions with each other throughout the whole season...
Ya well watch as season 2 just completely ignores that and tries to paint Blitz as the one in the wrong for not loving Stolas. This is where we enter the next problem with Stolas; treating Blitz as if he is in the wrong for not loving Stolas (or not believing that Stolas does genuinely love him). Stolas has been treating Blitz as nothing but a sex toy throughout all of season 1 and yet the show wants us to believe that BLITZ is in the wrong here??
Episode 6 Oops is where this problem really shows itself. I already ranted about this episode before, however the cage scene where Blitz and Fizz talk about their sex life is indicative of Viv trying to make Blitz look like the bad guy because Stolas did some nice things for him... off-screen. Talk about telling instead of showing. Like I said in that post, it feels like a retcon; we never saw Stolas do any of these nice things for Blitz and that doesn't even line up with his behavior in season 1.
It's also just...lazy. Viv couldn't be bothered to actually SHOW Stolas doing these nice things for Blitz so she just TELLS us that Stolas did all of these things for him so Blitz could look bad. However, it falls flat because once again, it's told to us, not shown. AND EVEN IF we accept that Stolas did do all of these nice things for Blitz, THAT STILL DOESN'T EXCUSE HIS TREATMENT OF HIM!!!
So the show wants us to see Blitz as the bad guy for the crime of not loving Stolas because he treated him like a toy rather than a person, but Blitz is NOT in the wrong for acting this way at all yet the show paints him as the bad guy anyway. The show is basically saying that a victim is in the wrong for getting mad at their abuser for abusing them.
"But Blitz took advantage of his childhood friend!" Yes, Blitz was an asshole, but so was Stolas, yet the show acts as if Blitz is 100% the bad guy and Stolas is 100% an innocent soft boy. Speaking of Stolas...
5. Stolas is terrible
So Stolas is terrible, plain and simple. He is very toxic and abusive to Blitz as I've already gone over. However, for some reason, rather than framing Stolas as the abuser he is, Season 2 opts to instead frame him as an UwU soft boy who supposedly did nothing wrong. This is less of a problem with Stolitz and more with Stolas's character as a whole; the show portrays Stolas as an UwU sad Owl boy and we're supposed to sympathize with him despite him not being a great person.
And Stolitz is where this issue shows itself the most. Season 2 never portrays Stolas as in the wrong for how he treated Blitz in Season 1, instead trying woobify him and simply turning around and saying "oh Stolas just wants a friend! He genuinely does love Blitz! Why doesn't Blitz love him back?!". We clearly are not supposed to see Stolas as the abuser here, however, no matter how you slice it Stolas IS the abuser in this relationship.
And so far the show has never made him apologize to Blitz for how he treated him nor has it tried to make him better himself for Blitz. And it seems like Viv has tried to make Stolas look better in episode 6 with the scene where Blitz says that Stolas did all these nice things for him, but once again it's ineffective because it was off-screen. And once again the decision to make him and Blitz childhood friends ties directly back into this because as I've already said, it makes Stolas look far worse because he's treating his own childhood friend like a sex toy, despite how much the show wants to convince us that Stolas is just an UwU soft boy who did nothing wrong and just wants a friend, and no matter how much the show will demonize Blitz, I can not feel bad for Stolas because he's the abuser, not Blitz.
Stolas is just incredibly unlikeable and hard to sympathize with, especially when it comes to this relationship. "But Stolas genuinely loves Blitz!"- putting aside the fact that was also a retcon, even if Stolas genuinely loves Blitz, that doesn't somehow mean that how Stolas treats Blitz is ok. Despite how much the show wants us to convince us that Blitz is the bad guy here and Stolas is just a victim, Stolas is an abuser, there is absolutely NO denying it.
But what if I told you there is a piece of HB content that exemplifies this issue the most? Well...I promised y'all I'd analyze this video so...without further ado...
6. Let's Tear Apart the "Just Look My Way" music video
The second I finished watching this music video, I KNEW that I had to talk about it in this post. Why exactly? Well aside from it being the worst piece of HB content I have ever seen, it's also...a stolitz song. It shows off the issue of Stolas being woobified in season 2 greatly. In this section, I'm going to analyze the lyrics in the song while explaining why this song is the culmination of my biggest issues with this stupid ship. This entire song is about Stolas singing about how sad he is that Blitzy doesn't love him 🥺, and it is SO telling that this is the message the song is going for given the lyrics like this:
"Let me hold you, keep you close to me I long to hear your voice"
"I don't care that you're of lower station Or primed to sate my dark temptations Why can't you understand? Let me explain!"
These lyrics scream "Blitzy why don't you love me!!!". But that's contrasted by lyrics like...this;
"But dearest, I know better now I must give you this choice"
"I will try to make amends For making you means to an end So, look my way, please, look my way"
This actually sounds like Stolas apologizing to Blitz for how he treated him, which is exactly what I wanted...but the rest of the lyrics are just Stolas saying "Blitzy why don't you love me!!!". It's once again choosing to victimize Stolas rather than actually framing him as the abuser he is. This entire song is the most melodramatic emotionally manipulative shit I've ever seen, it once again portrays Stolas as an UwU soft boy who did nothing wrong and just wants someone to love him.
"But Viv didn't write the lyrics!" For those who don't know, Just Look My Way was a fan song that Viv and her team decided to animate as well as make Stolas's voice actor sing. And yes, Viv did not write this song, a fan did, however my issue is that within the context of the rest of the show up until this point, these lyrics do not do any favors for this ship. And I feel like Viv chose this specific song just so she could make Stolas look like a UwU soft boy again. There's also the fact that Viv changed some of the lyrics as well, removing the little impish plaything line and the one talking about Octavia.
This could be done to make the song closer to canon...but there's also a possibility that Viv did this so she could NOT acknowledge Stolas's actual faults and make the song entirely about Stolitz. This post summed it up pretty well.
So conclusion; Just Look My Way is an awful music video that is horrifically bad when It comes to the context of this relationship and once again tries to make Stolas look sympathetic when he really isn't. This is not how you make a sympathetic character guys. Now let's talk about the final issue with Stolitz...
7. It's Just Plain Toxic
This is the biggest reason why I (and many other critics) dislike Stolitz; it's just plain toxic. It's a toxic ass ship where the abuser is portrayed as the victim while the victim is framed as the abuser, and where the abuser has never gone to better himself for the victim, yet the show wants us to root for this couple to get together for some reason despite that. The show constantly paints this an UwU cute childhood friendship when it's anything BUT that in reality. It's toxic, plain and simple.
8. Conclusion
Look, if you like or ship Stolitz, that's fine, I didn't make this post because I wanted people to stop shipping it. I made this post because I believe Stolitz is easily the worst part of the show, it's a horribly written toxic and abusive romance that we are supposed to root for and the fact that people DEFEND this ship despite it being OBJECTIVELY toxic and unhealthy is baffling to me.
So ya, that's why I hate Stolitz...bye.
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laylaplease · 9 months ago
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Hiii same anon as earlier! I can leave one of these 🌸 so you know it’s me!!
And uh… hoooo damn I am all over big!Anakin, figuratively and literally hehe
I imagine that on one hand there can be the softer side where he picks up his tiny and carries them like they’re a baby bird, keeps them tucked safe in his pocket… or in other parts of his clothes say if he’s got a long flight on a cruiser or starfighter… ❤️‍🔥
And lets them sleep in the crook of his neck or right between his pectorals with his hand keeping them warm and they can feel his heartbeat
But then there’s the other side of him and if his tiny stepped outta line or anyone messed with his tiny… oooh boi
Dear 🌸, how are you single-handedly curing my laziness!? I love talking and thinking about this !!
MDNI
My favorite wholesome idea is Ani having his tiny asleep on top of his chest, shielding them with the palm of his hand as they rest peacefully. They get tired so much faster than he does so he spends hours on weekly basis just watching them rest on top of him, caressing them and making sure nothing can hurt them in their most vulnerable moments.
Listening to Anakin's heart is like a lullaby, instantly sending them into the sweetest dreams. Anakin always tries his best to keep it steady so his precious wouldn't get startled if it became more rapid. Feeling his pulse vibrating through their tiny body is the highest form of connection.
Of course, even with his miniature partner Anakin finds ways to be entertained.
Seated between his legs while Anakin is 'busy' piloting, poor tiny can't stop shivering and trembling while feeling his bulge growing impossibly bigger, brushing their back like a predator. Anakin is huge. Everywhere. The fact that his cock alone would be enough to crush them is both exciting and terrifying. It never stopped Anakin from covering them in white though.
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anxious-lee · 8 months ago
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|| Ramshackle Tickle Headcanons ||
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A/N: just watched the pilot last night and read the comic this morning, I'm ready 💪. I can tell these three are gonna be my new beloved found family. as far as I can tell, there isn't a whole lot of fan content of this on tumblr so I'm really scared this is gonna find its way to the normies 😢
---
Vinnie
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- chaotic ler
- usually the first one to initiate a tickle fight
- fights to WIN (and have fun with her friends)
- the roughest tickler of them all; squeezes, scribbles, and pokes anywhere and everywhere she can reach. she will the loudest laughter she can out of you
- skipp is her easiest lee; he'll start a chase and everything for the game of it, but he doesn't fight too hard once he gets caught
- stone, however, is the hardest lee, but we'll get to that later; despite how difficult he is to corner, she likes the challenge; besides, somebody's got to make sure that sad twig boi smiles
- once she finds your worst spot, she's not leaving
- teases with evil laughter and playful mockery; "no mortal can escape the clutches of the TICKLE MONSTER MWAHAHAHA!" "You wanna get away? You wanna get away?? Well you're not gettin' away~"
- when tickled, she SCREAMS and CACKLES but will NOT beg
- doesn't mind being tickled, doesn't love it; it's all in good fun
- ^ you wouldn't know that based on how hard she fights her ler; kicking, clawing, flailing, you name it; she does not like to lose
- in fact, she'd rather have her face turn purple than call it quits; the ler just has to know when to stop on their own because she's sure as hell not going to tell them
- most ticklish spot is her armpits
- do not try to outrun her because she is so damn persistent. she will catch you; tackles and pins you down before she tickles you
Skipp
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- lawful lee
- has the goofiest little giggles in the world; a real "teehee" lad
- can't and won't hold back his laughter
- by far the happiest to be a lee
- actively likes tickling and WILL admit it
- most ticklish spot is his sides
- he can tickle if he thinks one of his friends needs it but he mainly prefers to be the lee
- doesn't wiggle that much; all the energy that would go into squirming goes into giggling instead
- cups his pink cheeks and gives tiny feet kicks 🥰
- will squeal if you tickle his neck
- a lot of teases don't work on him because they rely on being embarrassed, and he's not embarrassed about tickling
- the teases that DO work are baby talk, since it adds to the silly feeling
- pokes tickle him the most
- his giggly laughter is laced with mangled outcries; "HEHEHEHE WAITHEHEHE STO- HEHE NOT THERE HEHEHE"
- if skipp gets in stone's personal space one too many times, stone'll wreck him (he knows skipp is doing it on purpose)
- isn't that invested with winning or losing a tickle fight; he's just happy to be there
- tries to get stone to loosen up about tickling (explanation later)
- gets ganged up on by the other two the most
- falls for those old tickle tricks, not because he wants to get tickled, but because he is just so obliviously trusting
Stone
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- HOOOO BOY
- the one we've all been waiting for
- I'm gonna let yall know right now this ones going to be the longest (SUE ME OKAY?!)
- neutral lee-leaning switch
- will swear up and down on his life that he's not ticklish (it's a lie!) until the other two little gremlins finally decide to prove him wrong
- he's very embarrassed about being ticklish; skipp doesn't understand why and tries to get him more comfortable with it, which causes stone to turtle-up and shut down the conversation; vinnie takes a less gentle approach and just tells him to "loosen up, dude!"; it seems like a childish thing to him, like something he should have grown out of
- despite how embarrassed he is about his weakness, he's not actually embarrassed about saying the word; he can say "tickle" all day long, he just can't admit he's ticklish
- he repeats the same three words everytime someone asks: "I'm not ticklish"
- if he thinks for even a second he's about to get tickled, he sprints like his life depends on it; this means the first ten times his friends have tried to tickle him, they failed, no matter how stealthy they were.
- finally, on try eleven, they managed to overtake him; he wouldn't laugh for the first two whole minutes; vinnie was straddling his waist while skipp kept him from kicking and bucking her off; eventually, he did crack; it only took a random squeeze at his death spot for him to slip up: his thighs; vinnie caught on right away and went to town, and then poor stone couldn't keep himself together; if he laughed any harder, he swore he'd crumble to pieces; his arms waved around, too jellied up to put any real force behind them; his eyes were still squeezed shut, but his smile was brighter than the motherfucking sun; it even put skipp's to shame; he looked uncharacteristically like a little baby, laughing and shrieking
- vinnie and skipp's eyes practically filled with stars; neither of them had ever seen this side of stone before; but that was about to change
- he can't claim he's not ticklish anymore, but he'll still go to any lengths to avoid talking about it
- stone didn't know he had a death spot until that moment, nothing ever came into contact with his thighs so he had no way to know
- his laugh is very high-pitched, differing from his usual deep rumble; pure belly laughter with a side of hiccups (no not hiccup laughs, ACTUAL hiccups. it's the cutest thing I swear)
- within thirty seconds of laughing, he's lost all ability to save face; cries out a lot of "please"s if vinnie goes hard enough
- the tops of his cheeks will go red while he's being tickled; not full tomato, but just enough to shatter his pride
- he's the most adorable lee 💓💓💓
- he is SO HARD TO CATCH THO
- he's got the reflexes of a cat
- doesn't like being teased, then he gets a little too embarrassed
- the only comments that ARE acceptable are ones of curiosity; like if skipp goes "hmmm I wonder if this spot is ticklish?" or vinnie says "dang bro I didn't know you could laugh that hard"
- if he's comfortable with anyone tickling him, it's skipp; he knows he can trust him to not laugh at him
- as much as he'll deny it, he doesn't hate tickling as much as he wishes; in fact, it might even be a little bit fun <3
- as a ler, he's pretty skilled
- where vinnie is a very rough and sloppy ler, stone is very careful and methodical
- starts with light traces to amp up the tension, then goes in for the kill
- tickles skipp the most, because there's a significantly smaller chance of skipp fighting back
- he tickles his friends in an older brother sort of way; mostly its when they're bugging him
- teases with "ya learnt your lesson yet?" "that doesn't sound like someone who wants me to stop tickling" "you were practically asking for it, being a pain in the arse and everything"
- specifically teases skipp because he knows he likes it; "having fun, down there? i can see that smile, mister, you ain't fooling me"
- most of the time though he'll just watch the other two tickle fight and watch boredly
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IT TOOK A LOT OF RESTRAINT NOT TO RAMBLE
AND I DID ANYWAY!!!
I'll save the rest of my thoughts for potential fics
Hope you enjoy!
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bumblebee-is-best-boi · 8 months ago
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BLITZBEE WEEK DAY FIVE: SCARS
hoooo boy! This one is my fav. Originally it was just a Blitzwing story but I made it have Blitzbee for the purpose of this week.
I EVEN GAVE IT A TITLE
hehe
@blitzbee-week Day Five: Scars
title coming up soon vvv
Digits In Between The Wings
Characters: Blitzwing, Bumblebee, Astrotrain
Warning: Cybertronian cursing, mentions of throwing up, too much fluff and angst :)
story under the cut vvv
When Blitzwing used to be a seeker, he liked to polish himself. Not to the extent of Knockout, of course (no one obsessed over their polisher like Knockout), but enough to make his frame glimmer in the slightest bit. He had the perfect frame to show his glimmer off, but that wasn’t the main reason he polished himself. It wasn’t even about the polish at all! 
It was more about the machine he used.
The one he used, while it was a bit smaller than usual polishers, it used to fit perfectly in the space between his wings. It pressed against the joints of his wing bases in a way that wasn’t too much pressure to hurt or damage them, but enough to stimulate some pleasant feelings. 
Blitzwing used to attach his polisher to a long handle and just slip it between his wings once in a while, keeping it there for several minutes before moving on with his polishing. 
But when he was turned into a Triple Changer, that all changed. 
Blitzwing’s polisher had become too small to be nice between his wings, but it didn’t matter, since he wasn’t even comfortable using the polisher anymore. The idea of it gliding across his frame, one that had changed drastically for him, just made him a little bit sick in his tanks. Every time it glided over his scars, it made him wince in uncomfortableness, since his scars revealed his sensitive metal plates. Also, the experiment must have fragged something up between Blitzwing’s wings, because he felt as if something defective there was aching with everything he did, and touching it caused him lots of pain.
That didn’t mean Blitzwing didn’t at least try.
He tried many times, but he just couldn’t handle the feeling. And then after one wonky attempt, he broke his polisher into pieces in a fit of rage (or was it actually distress? He couldn’t really tell anymore).
After becoming a Triple Changer, his frame, which once had a slight glimmer, had become dull and matte. Blitzwing stopped taking care of his frame, sometimes to the point where Astrotrain had to force him to take care of himself for a while to prevent rust and cracked plates. Astrotrain might have been way taller than him, but he was also a bot who was very gentle with his movements (if he wanted to, most of the time he liked to be overly erratic). His fingers were nimble, originally to handle to spin his blasters and shoot out multiple rounds in quick succession, but also to handle the tools needed to keep a mech functioning. But no matter how much Astrotrain tried to take care of Blitzwing to make sure his unwillingness to do self care didn’t make him go offline, his frame glimmer was lost.
___
“For Primus’s sake Blitzwing, you should take care of yourself more often!” Astrotrain yelled in exasperation as he pushed one of Blitzwing’s arm plates open to scrape off dried energon build up from a damaged energon line, “Be lucky that this energon line wasn't so major, or you would have been bleeding out for hours on end. And also be lucky that I saw the bleeding before it got any worse!”
Astrotrain finally scraped it off, started patching the energon line, then switched faces and chuckled. “Heh, but I know you're not going to listen to me. It's just typical of you to do whatever you want without any thoughts of the consequences! Typical Blitzwing! All cuckoo and carefree!” 
Astrotrain kept snickering as he closed Blitzwing’s arm plate and stood up, “I know for sure that no matter what I say, we’re going to be right back here again, fixing some new problem!” 
Blitzwing switched faces and fumed, “Oh shut your mouth, slagger!”
“Ok ok, I will, for now. But you cannot shut the fact that my words speak the truth.” Astrotrain turned to walk away, his footsteps thundering, “Oh and by the way, Megatron wants us in the meeting room in ten minutes. I suggest you hurry and don't damage any more of yourself on the way, you know how much Megatron wants his Decepticons in top condition!”
Blitzwing opened his mouth to yell at Astrotrain, but he stopped and closed his mouth again, switching faces and standing up. He looked at his arm, where Astrotrain had fixed his energon line. Astrotrain’s words echoed through his processor multiple times, no matter how annoying it got. Blitzwing wanted to just laugh it off, to think of it as a silly joke, but he couldn't. It wasn't a silly joke. It was the truth.
No matter how much Blitzwing wanted to deny it, it was the truth. The cold hard truth.
____
Refueling wasn't a big problem for Blitzwing… sometimes. Sometimes he got himself enough to last a while, sometimes he had only enough to run on half a tank. It was quite hard to adjust to a frame that demanded more energon to function, but he made it work eventually (He didn’t). And then there was the purging that happened once in a while during the night… but he didnt like to talk about that.
But what was most annoying about his frame upgrade was the pain that came with it. Not even the idea of three faces annoyed him that much (even though the face switching did hurt at one point). His knees were constantly hurting, due to the weird build of his legs, and he kept breaking his knee braces by tearing them up and destroying them whenever he felt like it. For days on end, his tanks constantly felt sore, no matter if his tank was full or empty or whatever in between. And what was the worst thing was the dull ache in the joints of his wings, and the constant prickling pain down his back in between his wings.
He once wanted to paint over his scars, but every time he thought of it, he always got sidetracked to thinking about painting himself in many different colors wilder than any Decepticon had ever seen before. Despite that sounding like a cool idea, Blitzwing always countered those thoughts because he didn’t want to look stupid or get in trouble with Megatron. Instead, he decided to see how others reacted if someone else was painted in wild colors.
This led to him going to the seeker trine’s room with buckets of paint and painting all sorts of crazy things on them (originally he wanted to just paint Starscream, but seeing them in the seeker pile made him all too happy to paint all three of them). Blitzwing then waited till the next day to see what would happen… It was lots of humiliation and getting punished by Megatron pretty badly. This scared Blitzwing to his very spark, to the point where he felt guilty about it (but no way he would ever admit it was his fault).
Only Astrotrain knows what truly happened on that day.
At that point, Blitzwing had completely given up on trying to fix himself, trying to take care of himself, caring for a frame that he once cherished. No use in caring for a frame that had been warped beyond his own recognition and repair.
_____
“Blitzwing.” Astrotrain spoke, trying to get Blitzwing’s attention. 
No response.
“Blitzwing.” Astrotrain hissed, “You glitch, I know you can hear me,” He looked down at the ground, “Stop ignoring me please.”
Blitzwing eventually raised his head, “What is it.”
Astrotrain looked into Blitzwing’s optics, “There’s only one energon cube left for today.”
Blitzwing’s optic twitched, and he switched faces, “That’s what you bothered me for?!”
Astrotrain switched faces, “Oh EXCUSE me for trying to help my DEAR Amica! Oh what an aft am I!”
“Slag off!”
Astrotrain switched faces, “Do you want the fragging energon cube or not?”
Blitzwing switched faces, “You can have it.”
Astrotrain reached for the energon cube, then stopped.
“You refueled yourself at least more than halfway today, right?”
Blitzwing’s optic twitched, then he switched faces, “Ah yes! I had quite the feast today! Oh such a nice servo salad it was! Aha!”
Astrotrain grimaced for a slight moment before grabbing the cube, “the idea of you eating other Cybertronians still unnerves me heavily… but at least it’s better than nothing. ”
Blitzwing switched faces again and looked at the ground as Astrotrain chugged the energon cube. He felt bad for lying, but also not sorry for it at the same time. No matter whatever Astrotrain felt through the Amica bond.
Speaking of the Amica bond, Blitzwing rarely made use of the emotion sensing ability that the bond had. He had too much going on in his head to go poking around in Astrotrain’s emotions.
But this time, Blitzwing used the bond. He used the bond to try and poke into Astrotrain’s emotions, but gave up when he felt the mess of emotions in there. He didn’t care enough to go in there and try to see what is what.
He just didn’t care.
_____
But then he met Bumblebee. That little yellow Autobot who kind of slightly annoyed him to no end and was the love of his life at the same time. The one who treated every single one of Blitzwing’s faces with love and care, even when he was being a bit of a glitch.
Every time that they met up, Bumblebee would bring something to cheer Blitzwing up, whether it was a few cubes of energon, some cans of oil, a servo (Bumblebee never said where he got it from, to Blitzwing’s disappointment, since it was one of the best servos he ever had), or even his own polisher! 
But the best thing was how Bumblebee tried his best to handle Blitzwing’s pain. He couldn’t do anything about Blitzwing’s knee pain, other than at least try to tell Blitzwing to stop destroying his knee braces. Bumblebee would bring his hands over Blitzwing’s numerous scars, massaging them the best he could (he stopped if Blitzwing was in too much pain though). He would even move his fingers over the space between Blitzwing’s wings, putting his digits between the wings and massaging the wing base joints, soothing the discomfort in them.
It was the best thing Blitzwing had felt in centuries.
____
Holding the energon cube in his hands, Blitzwing looked down at it with a solemn look on his face. Why did his love offer this to him? He gingerly cupped the cube, afraid to spill a drop and disappoint his little sweetspark. 
“Why aren't you drinking your energon Blitz? Worried that it’ll run away?” Bumblebee chugged his cube of energon and tilted his head at Blitzwing.
A sigh came out of Blitzwing’s mouth. He just couldn’t tell Bumblebee the truth… he couldn’t! 
“Why aren’t you drinking your energon, Blitzwing?” Bumblebee’s antennae drooped in sadness.
Oh god, the sight of Bumblebee being sad hurt Blitzwing to the deepest depths of his spark. He needed to find a way to mitigate the situation before it got worse!
The slight ache in his tanks gave him a great idea.
“Ach… I have a slight tank ache. I don't really feel like refueling right now…” Blitzwing spoke, hoping that everything would stop at that moment.
But when Bumblebee immediately turned his head around to look at him, he was greatly surprised. He didn't expect that Bumblebee would become so attentive to him.
“Alright buddy, lie down.” Bumblebee commanded Blitzwing, “I wanna try something”
Blitzwing was confused, but he laid down anyway. Luckily the ground was soft-ish, or else he would have been very uncomfortable. And so he waited for something to happen
He waited…
And he waited…
And he waited some more…
Until suddenly, he felt a weight on his tanks. Blitzwing immediately looked up and saw that Bumblebee had plopped himself on top of his tanks. He kept staring, even when Bumblebee looked up to meet his gaze. 
“Hey, you’re a big mech, I have to change how I do things here!” Bumblebee pouted.
Blitzwing watched Bumblebee, then switched faces and laughed, “Wow, you’re heavier than I thought!”
He received a slight kick to the tank.
“Not funny.” Bumblebee frowned.
Blitzwing winced, switched faces, and sighed, “Apologies.”
“Good. Now let me do this, and I promise that your tank aches and pains will alleviate soon!” Bumblebee positioned himself and reached out with his hand. 
The hand settled low on Blitzwing’s hips before going up and stopping just underneath his chassis. This was repeated 10 times. Then some semi circle motions across his abdomen, also repeated ten times. There then came some soft massages and kneading, which calmed Blitzwing down.
But when Bumblebee did the little vibrations with his hands, this surprised Blitzwing a little bit.
And then Bee was finished.
“Wow,” Blitzwing gasped, “That was… wow.”
Bumblebee smiled, “I get tank aches too, so Ratchet taught me this to alleviate the pain.”
“Could… you teach how to do that?” Blitzwing asked.
Bumblebee smirked mischievously, “Only if you drink the energon cube. You need it.”
Blitzwing sighed, then drank the cube. It actually felt nice…
It seemed that what Bumblebee did worked really really well.
____
After a while, it seemed as if the treatment Blitzwing got by being Bumblebee’s sweetspark started affecting him in a good way. His frame felt so much more comfortable to him now, his aches between the wings had stopped, his scars were less sensitive, and he purged much less. Face switching was less of a chore to him now, more being more flowy instead of jerky and sudden. He even used what Bumblebee taught him to alleviate tank ache.
Astrotrain, as observant as he was, was bound to notice something.
____
“Damn Blitzwing, youve having more energon right now than ive seen you have in an entire week!” Astrotrain laughed, slapping Blitzwing on the back.
Blitzwing’s wings twitched from the slap, his face switched, and he scowled. Finishing his energon cube, he turned towards Astrotrain.
“So I guess Swindle sold you some good sense or something?”
“No you dumbaft, Swindle hasn’t even been here in a while. And any transactions I do or will do will be face to face with him, cause I don’t trust him entirely.”
“Ah, ah.” Astrotrain smirked as he kneeled down, “Then tell me what’s gotten you to act so different? It’s definitely not from you following my advice, that’s for sure.” Another laugh from Astrotrain ensued.
Blitzwing fumed for a bit, then switched faces, “it’s… the little Autobot.”
Astrotrain paused for a moment, then switched faces, “What did the Autobot do.”
Blitzwing reminded himself that Astrotrain was not entirely trusting of Bumblebee, so he had to choose his words carefully if he didn’t want to accidentally screw everything up.
“He… gives me energon every time we meet…” Blitzwing switched faces “He treats me like a queen! His beautiful big queen!” 
Astrotrain froze, not expecting to hear that. Switching faces, he brought himself closer to Blitzwing, eyeing him curiously.
“So you’re saying that this… tiny little Autobot… has been helping you with your problems?”
Blitzwing nodded vigorously.
Astrotrain suddenly switched faces, “Well FINALLY! Finally someone got some sense into your processor!” Laughing, he patted Blitzwing on the shoulder, “And, please keep this up. It’s healthier for you, and there’ll be more for your little Autobot to love!”
Blitzwing switched faces, blushing in embarrassment, but nodded anyway.
After a while of snickering, Astrotrain switched faces, “But I must not get sidetracked, since there is something I have to say: Megatron has commanded that we go do an energon raid in about three hours. We actually have to be out of the base in one and a half hours,” Astrotrain said with a bit of bitterness in his voice, before softening his tone, “So have another cube and we can go, okay?”
Blitzwing nodded his head and drank his energon cube, “Alright.”
____
Even though he knew that his scars would never heal, Blitzwing knew that Bumblebee would be there for him, no matter what.
And that was more than enough for him.
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alientater · 6 months ago
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I have so much to say about s3 of bridgerton so I’m dumping it all into one post. Take my dumbass opinions as a writer for what you will 😂
- first foremost thank you my QUEEN Nicola for your confidence and courage (I am no better than a man 👀). I feel like this whole season was a reminder for me, through both Pen and Colin that bodies that look like my own (Pens) deserve love. I can’t even begin to tell yall how much watching people swoon over her body specifically has made me 🥹 blush because my own looks so much like hers.
- I absolutely adored how devoted Colin was to Pen. Watching him realize his love for her in all her forms, with all her flaws was absolutely adorable and wonderful and beautiful, and it, in its own way, comforted me that the more masculine side of my self can be the romantic, the devoted, the loving person that I am as well. Both his little speech in the carriage and his love confession at the end are now living rent free in my brain.
- I know many people think they should have cut some of Benedict’s scenes but I’m against that opinion. I ADORED his character development this season, and I think it served well as a break in the tension of the plot. you will NEVER catch me unhappy to see a bisexual king living his best and horniest life.
- I’m so glad Pen got to keep her Column. The books end with Colin revealing her identity and I’m so glad they changed that. So much from the book was changed to give her more agency and I’m so so so happy about that.
- Genuinely, I’m so excited to see what happens in Scotland with Francesca and Eloise and Michaela and John!! I have a suspicion they’re going to make it another spinoff show like Queen Charlotte, and then we’ll get Benedict’s season (which 👀💕 I have no clue what they’ll do with it but WHATEVER it is I will be parked in front of that TV the SECOND it drops). Whatever it is they have planned I have a sneaking suspicion we’re finally going to get some sapphic romance 👀 so.
- I absolutely cannot stand the hate this season is getting online. I really think it was well done, and I enjoyed every second of it.
- I do wish they’d shown a *few* more spicy Polin scenes (or maybe made the end one a bit longer bc HOOOO boy 👀 I needed about another full 5-10 minutes of her riding him lord GOD almighty I need a glass of WATER). BUT they really didn’t get any more spice than Kate and Anthony did last season (in fact they had quite a bit more I’d say), and I know we’ll see more of it next season hehe 😈 so 😏.
- John dying is literally actually physically going to break my heart when we get to Francesca’s storyline. ALSO I think I really…. I want her to fall in love with him wholly and completely too. I think she has in some ways. I hope in her story, they explore the very real love between them, mostly because I adore his beautiful lil autistic ass.
- I really wish they’d brought back Daphne and the duke a bit more to help violet and Fran a bit. I think Daphne specifically would have really helped soothe that relationship.
- can we get an Eloise Benedict swing scene every season?? Plz? For me? I adore their queer sibling bond so so so much.
- I’m so glad Pen and Eloise are on good terms again. Their friendship breaking just really…
- also, on Eloise, I adore the character growth I saw her go through this season. I think she’s really learning how to see and love the people around her for who they are and it’s so beautiful. I think people were right about her self absorption to a certain degree but… every character has flaws. No one is really infallible. And I think I went through a similar growth, learning how to check and weild my priveledge, and it’s comforting to know I’m not alone in some of the mistakes I made
- I have so many feelings about Cressida Cowper. I know she’s a bully, and I disliked her originally, but something about this season made me…. Sort of like her. First of all, she’s so cunty and I absolutely LOVE that for her. Her outfits are 😮‍💨 every single time. The SLEEVES on those dresses. Like. I really hope she has character growth of her own. Also. You can’t convince me that woman isn’t a femme lesbian. I want to see her set up a nice little estate and live happily ever after with a woman she loves, honestly. I feel like it was really realistic and fascinating to see her schism with her family. I hope she doesn’t take her mother’s advice to heart. That she breaks the generational curse and learns to be both kind AND cunty 😂. I hope Eloise and her make up somewhat too. I just. I don’t want her to be the villain. The pressures of society are their own villain.
- Bring back Edwina Sharma and her Prince can we start a FUCKING petition bro.
- two people in on that show that no matter what they are being paid, are not being paid enough 1) the COSTUME designer and 2) the intimacy coordinator. Every five seconds I found myself saying “god that dress” or “oh man, I need that waistcoat”
- I love that the writers chose to make the featherington sisters more than just… jokes? Philippa especially. She really had some of the best breakout lines of the season “insert himself where” GIRL “Farley, now! the bugs!!” SHES SO CUTE and Mr Finch baby boy so are you and your love for her 🥹 it’s just so wholesome. I love that Shonda really has showed through this show that even with our eccentricities, we all deserve to be loved, appreciated, cherished.
- we stand by Portia featherington. She really made the best of some SHITTY as situations, and we love her for that. It’s so important to me that she’s not the villain either. That she and pen worked things through, learned how to support each other, and that Portia apologized. I think she’s definitely…. Let’s say morally gray but how morally grey really is robbing the aristocracy? 🤫. I honestly? Kind of hope she finds a love match, or finds happiness in her singleness without having to rely on a man. That she learns to live in her power.
- Did I mention how devoted Colin is to Pen? Can we return to that? My FAVORITE moments of this season were the ones where he is so absolutely down bad for her that he can barely speak bc ME TOO baby boy. ME TOO. and that it’s pen. This season was for the girlies who never get noticed, who never had boys crush on them. Who have to make do living vicariously through others, who have to learn to love themselves, because the world does not seem to.
- can we bring back lord debbling? Lowkey…. I kinda liked him. I need him to be Cressida’s beard for real 🤫
- the mirror scene THE MIRROR SCENE 🫠😮‍💨😰🤤 I…. I have so many feelings. I keep hearing people being like “it was so cringe” but? I think I loved it because it felt so…. Realistic? I found myself loving it because it was so… slow and sweet and intentional and it was in every way an extension of Colin’s feelings for pen. He loves her enough that he treats her with only the most kind, most slow and soft touches. He considers her pleasure before his own (which, god is that dreamy I wanna be this man SO BAD). He talks her through. he appreciates in every way she SHOULD be appreciated. I’m just. I’m never going to be over how fantastically luke played him. How fantastic Luke and Nicola’s chemistry was. Can we appreciate the shots angles looking down on Penelope too bc oh man. Oh boy. Jesus Christ she would be walking ME like a dog to if she looked at me like that Holy Fuck. Also the THIGHS the TITTIES (👀 respectfully 👀 RESPECTFULLY). The little sneaky views of Colin’s butt hehe, the way Pen GULPS when she sees Colin (girl SAME). It reminded me so vividly of my own first time. it made me miss being that young and… idk. I feel like sex scenes often feel fake or unrealistic and the ones in this just felt SO real.
- on that topic can we all just appreciate how much Kate sharma is getting her cookie ate bc 😂 lord only knows she deserves it. ALSO. Petition for next season: I ABSOLUTELY need to see Colin on his knees doing the same for Pen 🤤👀 bc you KNow that man is a service top, and she deserves it.
- genuinely genuinely. I’m so afraid of the show now getting canceled because it has openly queer characters 🥺. I’ve fallen in love with it and it’s like there’s this dread, in the pit of my stomach, that it’s all going to end prematurely because people are already acting so shitty.
- I need violet to have her own spinoff with Marcus 👀 and CONTROVERSIAL OPINION (not controversial) I need their sex scenes bc 😳 LORD . I am not. ahem. I am sinning looking at lady bridgerton like this 😂
- I loved lady Danbury and pens exchange at the end of the season and they’re great friends in the books! I hope it develops more!
- how does Jonathan Bailey so convincingly play a man utterly in love/ lust with his wife as a gay man 😂. Also. Anthony’s little “LILACS”? Still thinking about that lol.
- I’m so glad Eloise didn’t tell Colin about pen being whistledown.
- really wish we’d had a wedding night sex scene 😅
- pen wearing a full set of acrylics and riding that man’s dick is….. god. I have been given a gift.
- Need Need NEED more of the Mondriches, just being happy and finding their place. Their ball this season was fucking fantastic.
- the end camera shot of Colin and pen kissing in front of the window she always watched him from 🫠🥹💕 I’m actually sick it’s SO PERFECT
- I knew Penelope was going to have the only boy 👀😏 called it hehe
- I think one of the things I love most about the show is just… seeing women support and uplift each other and work through things. Talk about the hard things. That’s how we grow as people.
In conclusion, I know many people disliked a lot of things about s3 but I, personally, adored it. And I also know why the writers cut what they did, and did what they did. I honestly think if they’d just added a few small things it would have been perfect. There was so much happening this season it felt overwhelming almost, and I think if I were to say if there’s anything to learn from this, it’s that they need to slow down. Focus on and give each plot its share. I wish I could give Bridgerton an infinite budget for infinite episodes to do whatever they wanted bc I know it would be good. ALSO if I have to endure a month wait like that again I’m actually fucking rioting. I liked the anticipation but it felt too long and just…. Idk. I think an episode a week would be a better way to stretch it if they wanted to keep that ploy. Anyways. If anyone’s actually read this far, I’m so sorry 😂. And to all the people griping… get a grip. It’s a beautiful show and the writing was honestly fantastic. just enjoy the media for what it is im actually begging you. If this show gets canceled because of something as trivial as not enough Polin sex scenes and having actual queer representation in fucking coming for ALL OF YOU.
Peace and light
Annika
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osarina · 3 months ago
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CARINA I SWEAR TO GOD LET THEM BE HAPPY FOR ONCE
BUT OK THIS PART WAS SO GOOD UGH THE GUILD IS HERE WOO HOOOO !!!! I cant wait to see how theyre gonna impact the rest of the fic bc I LOVE THE GUILD SM and i cant wait to see more of them hehe ^^
AND THE ANGST BETWEEN THEM UGHHH WHY PLEASE CARINA IF THIS ENDS THE SAME WAY AS UU DID I WILL NEVER RECOVER DWBHGVHBT LIKE PLEASE ITS KILLING MEEEEEE and DAZAI IN THE HOSPITAL??? WHAT HAPPENED HELLO UGH MY BABY :(( HE DESERVES EVERYTHING UGH :((
and finally (ik this is short but i have a tonna hw ITS ONLY BEEN 2 DAYS SINCE SCHOOL STARTED WHY T^T) there was ONE DETAIL THAT I AM CURIOUS ABT basically in ur bday fic for dazai u basically went w the theory that dazai is the old pm bosses grandson/is related to the old pm boss AND HERE you mention that his aunt dumps him in suribachi city AND that: "Mori was insistent on it, said we couldn’t risk one of them ever returning and upending everything we’ve built. He’s still searching for some to this day just to make sure.”
CARINA...ARE YOU FORESHADOWING SOMETHING??????
REDDDD AJDUFHASIFHSDUIF NEITHER OF THEM DIE BY THE END OF THE FIC I PROMISEEEE
OMG i was SOOOO excited to finally get the guild here because now is when the plot really starts to finally kick up, it's gonna get intense QUICKKKKK hehehe ... but we still have one chapter left of reader and dazai being able to chill
KSDFHAISFHUSHFD I PROMISEEEEEE IT WON'T END THE SAME WAY AS UU ... what happened to dazai tho ... that hasn't been confirmed yet ;) he's under the impression that it was another suicide attempt but it's worthwhile to note that he doesn't remember anything leading up to what happened.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHHHHHHHHH I CAN NEITHER CONFIRM NOR DENY ANYTHING UR SAYING HAHAHAHHAHHHHHHH BUT UR DEFINITELY ONTO SOMETHING THERE
beloved red <3333 it's always a pleasure to see you in my notifs, i hope school is going well for you lovely
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frozenhi-chews · 2 months ago
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Can you ramble about your sona Pan/Solace? (:-)
I love their design a lot hehe /gen <3
Hoooo goshhh. Solace...
Solace, or Pan as they are also and originally called, is a true sona. One of them at least (fun fact, I have about 7 sonas. I just use one as a self insert. Nine counting the true sonas)
Pan was originally part of a two-character set, which was gonna be called Sickle and Sythe
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They were gonna be called Sickle, but Pan stuck more because it was a shortened version of Pancake. These two were made during a REALLY rough patch in my life, made after certain thoughts in my head and all that. That eventually just faded out and they got a new purpose, kinda.
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I made a humanized version of them that was scrapped. The name Solace came from the phrase "you find solace in me", which is something I discovered when drawing the middle doodle. And the last one's about "love yourself. And if you can't, I will love you for you." Yeah theyre also a vent sona.
The blade on their tail is mostly for self defense. Or to use as an actual weapon. They also have a spiked collar with a pendant dangling off of it. Like a pet or something. Idk I put it on. It symbolizes something, not entirely sure what. Just felt compelled to put it on there. The tail also has a red lining to hide the fact there can be blood on it
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I mean, Pancake and Pan are the same person. So what does it mean when Pancake let's Pan stab her through the head, or chest, or wherever else? It's mostly stuff they inflict on Pancake. And she let's them.
There was like a part where they were kinda in a romantic-ish thing. But I pushed that onto Skittles. Not the sona.
They were always accompanied by one other character. There was another one that got scrapped after Scythe, and currently the character they're with is aeiou.
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aeiou (yes she's named after the Moonbase Alpha meme video) is supposed to represent self loathing and anger and sadness in general. But she's just not too important here.
Also Solace can only speak in second person, occasionally third person. They can't say "me" or "I" or "we." Mostly "you" and "she" and "him." Always to someone else, never to them.
So yeah. Thanks for the interest!! I would like art of them at some point, but they're so personal to me that I can't really handle that. Like seriously i have some STRICT rules with Pan. But yah. Thanks!!
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aryisacapricat · 1 month ago
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perhaps........yuour babygirl
Ooooooh boy here we go
First impression I don't actually remember my exact first impression of Iggy, but I think I knew he was meant to be one of those gruff dudes with hidden depth after the first Lib. I had liberated Jodi kinda early in my first playthru so I didn't get much of their scenes together (plus I think their little meet up scene after a rite got taken over by the one with Jodi and Pam). Later I would find out on TV Tropes that they can get together and was incredibly intrigued how that even happens with the few scenes they had. That's when my brain went wild filling in the blanks and the rest is history.
Impression now This grown ass man is my pathetic, hot trash babygirl and I love him so much. Out of all the blorbos I've had that have infested my brain, he somehow became the most resilient. All due to the fact there was barely any fan content of him so it was all up to me to fill the void.
Favorite moment Oh DEFINITELY the scene after with him and Jodi after the second time you face him. Especially this line,
And he keeps waiting. For there is little else for him, there, in the Downside. He keeps waiting... but, not for very long. ... not for very long.
Idea for a story Oh ho HOOOO boy. Y'all already know about Killing Time and Iggy in the Downside. I have soooo many more ideas than what is physically possible for me to do. Some are oneshots I have planned for after KT. Also a few AU ideas that I probably won't seriously pursue but they're fun to run in my brain anyway.
Unpopular opinion Yea Iggy got WAY too much hate, even with the bad first impression. Back then, pretty much every mention of him from the fandom was just shitting on him and about wanting him to stay far away from Jodi as possible. Thankfully that hate has toned down a lot since then (likely due to my propaganda, hehe).
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Favorite relationship Do I even need to say it? Like, I know it's all just my headcanon, but Jodi and Iggy really are a great dynamic to write. And who doesn't love when two strong characters are vulnerable with each other?
Favorite headcanon Does it count if I say Moira? She's just been a huge delight designing a writing. Otherwise, it's Iggy being a goofy, sweet guy who deep down, just wants someone to love.
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h0t-p1nk-ch33tah-pr1nt · 9 months ago
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He little smirk he bdhe hoobsh hoooo hehehehehehehheh stupid little smirjk hehe hhghshhooo heheh
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crowcoriathevampire · 4 days ago
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Hoo hoooo! ✨
Today I have to send more file reports with the cats to every house- for money... For money 🥹
At least I can meet Sir Alan... Hehe
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plushs-stuff · 1 year ago
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WIP and hoooo boy hehe this will be silly
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baby-bill-rp · 2 months ago
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Today’s just so wonderful, I feel like chuckling
Ha ha ha
I feel all fuzzy inside like a duckling; full of tarantulas
And now that I’m here, tonight, it’s gonna get weird!
Ah-ha-ha-ha!
Look at these creatures, not enough features Cats should breath fire, bears should sing choir! *Choir singing* (Very nice)
Look at this tower under my power Look at these people, puny and feeble!
(Ooooooo hoooo!)
Look, I’m just a triangle trying to save you
From the delusions society gave you
Gravity’s a lie and so is the sky
Trust in the all-seeing, all-knowing eye!
Look at this money–who’s that, honey?
Look throughout history, how could you miss me?
(Seriously, I’m all over the place)
Look at this weather, I could do better Mandelbrot rainbows, screaming tornadoes!
Look at this loser, drinking coffee *Sips*
…Now it’s decaf! *Spits*
(Mwahahahaha!)
Look at these people, calling me evil
Right back at you, now you’re all statues!
Now everything you know has disappeared
It’s gonna get weird...
Oh my- you're very creative!
Hehe that was a silly song
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mahoushojoe · 2 years ago
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hiii!!! as the authority on neji, I wanted to ask your thoughts on how you would've written the hyuga clan plot, because you actually have good opinions - where I struggle to reconcile it is how im stunned neji almost sent hinata into cardiac arrest and hiashi didn't like. kill him over it. I'm not displeased but it does surprise me!
HIYA!! first of all thank you for the ask hehe its very flattering when people genuinely ask for my (humble) opinion about neji stuff considering i am Just A Guy That Likes Neji so thank you 💖
hoooo boy how i would have written the hyuga plot. oh well okay. under the cut bc this got AWAY from me.
so first of all before all of that i'll answer your question about how neji got away with almost killing hinata. here's the the doylist interpretation of it: kishimoto just Did Not Care. there's a billion contradictions in just the way he wrote the hyuga plot alone bc he wrote it to serve a certain agenda and that was:
1) establishing neji as a powerful antagonist - an antagonist similar to sasuke in abilities and attitude and, maybe unintentionally, position within the shinobi system. making neji similar to sasuke is important bc in the context of shonen his Biggest rival at the time was sasuke, so setting naruto up against someone similar to him and having him win would be a way to (weakly imo) establish naruto's growth as a ninja and the ways in which he has approached sasuke in terms of skill or ability or power
2) establishing hinata as a....idk ally to naruto. character in a similar position to naruto. maybe even love interest for naruto. in any case, it was an introduction to hinata who would provide an emotional stake for naruto in the plot that leads up to naruto vs neji.
3) write the dogshit "fate vs free will" type themes he was trying to go through with. kishimoto needs naruto to smash the idea of being predestined to fail and what other opponent is better to have than someone whose fate is literally tattooed on his forehead?
4) provide worldbuilding for the hyuga clan, which, by the way, was intended to make us feel sorry for HINATA, chiefly, not neji. sure, we get neji's side of the story later, but that is more of an explanation for his behavior and not given as a reason to root for him. WE root for him bc we have common sense.
moving past all that, the point i'm trying to make is that the reason neji doesnt face consequences for what happened with hinata is that this story and this arc literally ISN'T about neji. it's about naruto, and, very peripherally, hinata. for us to know or witness whatever consequences neji faced for his actions -his cruel but PERFECTLY ALLOWED ACTIONS WITHIN THE RULES- we would actually be provoked into feeling bad for him, and, god forbid, taking his side, which kishimoto doesnt want us to do bc this arc's power entirely derives from hinata being the victim of this narrative and naruto being the one to avenge her. neji is genuinely, and i say this with love, a means to an end here. he is there to serve a specific purpose, and he does a lovely job of being shit at it.
but that's the doylist analysis of it. the watsonian analysis would be that neji DID face consequences, we just don't see them. what happened was a huge rebellion against the head family, i suppose, and assuming that there is any type of consistency in the way kishimoto set up the hyuga, he would have been punished with the curse mark at the very least. we just see the story from naruto's point of view, so we don't see it literally happen. maybe. people like to argue that neji wasn't punished because hiashi doesn't give a shit about hinata, and like, okay, fair, except even in a world where hiashi wouldn't bat an eye at his nephew almost murdering his oldest daughter, hiashi would still care that this prodigy from the branch family is running around seriously injuring head family members with impunity. its not about hinata here, its about neji. like, if this kid can literally attack and almost KILL the heiress of the clan and get away with it, what's to stop the rest of the branch members from doing the same? from the way the hyuga clan is presented, branch members do most of the actual physical labor for the hyuga clan- including protecting it of course- which means they're better fighters, which means there's only one thing holding them back from fighting back, which is the Brain Melting Curse Mark. which is why, in my perspective, neji totally got punished for it, just like his father got punished for just THINKING angrily about hinata all those years ago. it's not about hinata, it's about branch members rebelling and getting away with it. so yeah. i think neji did face consequences, we just didn't see them because kishimoto Literally Did Not Care and because it would have poked holes in naruto's free will spiel and it would have made hinata look like kind of an asshole. neji went on defying the hyuga anyway because he's a bad bitch!
why hiashi didn't KILL neji over it- hm. hm indeed. i think he could have. he'd have grounds for it, in the fucked up system they live in. and its frustrating because the story can't seem to decide on a correct characterization for hiashi. does he care about hinata or not? does he care about hizashi or not? does he care about NEJI or not? is he genuinely emotionally attached to him or is that just guilt bc of hizashi? i don't know. he could have easily gotten away with killing neji outright and it would have been a lot less trouble for him. im just gonna assume he felt like he owed his brother to keep him alive or something, or like, he was astute enough to realize that the whole situation was his fault anyway, although that implies that hiashi has anything resembling a conscience or backbone or common sense or self awareness or- whatever. hiashi didnt kill neji. yay. neji died anyway so its all wins for him in the end
now.... for how i would write the hyuga plot....oh, tumblr user jewchihas, the can of worms you have opened...
well, for the hyuga plot to go the way i want it to, a lot of things about naruto as an entire story would have to structurally change. we have two options to use with hinata here, but im going to go with making her someone sympathetic and not an annoyingly privileged artificial victim.
hinata could have easily been a great character during the fight with neji. and all it would have taken was someone mentioning the curse mark.
it was already established that hinata witnessed the time hiashi tortured hizashi for thinking angrily about her. she was hiding behind hiashi, but she saw it, and thus she knows the position of branch members relative to her and the means with which they are disciplined and prevented from harming her. she herself is a head family member, meaning she would theoretically be taught how to activate the curse mark herself - especially after it's established that neji's father held ill will towards her.
now, that presents us with a situation where, during neji vs hinata, hinata, being beaten to hell and back, could EASILY win the fight - and humiliate neji even worse than he was humiliating her- by just activating the curse mark. and yet, it needed to be shown that she Actively Chose Not To Because It's Wrong, and because she feels empathy for neji that hiashi didn't feel for hizashi. THAT is what would have made her character someone I could genuinely believe had a kind heart and a genuine desire to have a fair fight and improve. in reality, all hinata actually did was taunt neji about their differences in status, which just really makes it even more understandable why neji was so fucking pissed at her.
so, yeah. that would just be for hinata's character. not a lot of time is spent showing what actually happens to hinata hyuga-politics wise but i guess we could say that she learns about her privilege and works to make things equal. maybe even rejecting heirdom if it means being the heir to all this suffering. but whatever what do i know.
neji and hiashi's relationship needs to be more accurately defined. i dont know, like, how exactly does neji feel about hiashi? how does hiashi feel about neji? and if hiashi actually loves neji which is what is implied later in the story, how can hiashi just go on upholding the branch system? once these parameters are defined, we can go about actually having neji using that to poke holes in the hyuga system.
but the actual hyuga system can't fall on its own, because it serves konoha's purposes. the byakugan remaining konoha's exclusive property via the insular ways of the hyuga and the endless supply of cheap soldiers in the form of branch members it provides is too beneficial. konoha's leadership actually doesn't care about the hyuga people's wellbeing similarly to how it doesn't care about the uchiha's wellbeing- to them, they are an endless well of powerful ocular jutsus and nothing else, because that is how the dehumanizing shinobi system treats people's bodies, lives, and ethnic identities. the difference between the hyuga and uchiha's positions re: konoha politics is that the hyuga - at least the head family hyuga - aligned themselves WITH konoha's leadership whereas the uchiha aligned themselves, as whistleblowers (a job they were purposely marginalized and forced into, by the way!) against konoha's leadership. thus, in order to topple the hyuga branch system and keep it toppled, one must topple konoha's shinobi system, and neji and the other branch members (and hinata if she's a good person) must believe in this wholeheartedly.
i dont know how it would go down. it would require a total rewrite of literally all of naruto and i genuinely dont have the facilities for that 😅😅😅 all i can say is that it would be rad if neji and sasuke allied somehow, or if one or both of them led the branch hyuga into total revolt against the head family. the only thing we have to lose is our chains etc etc. naruto needs to grow tf up regarding the hyuga and realize that the stuff he said to neji was a bunch of horseshit. or, funnily, neji takes naruto's words to him in the chunin exams to mean "okay LITERALLY break your fate like literally get rid of those people lol". so yeah. i dont think neji should go full itachi im just saying that the branch family needs to run the show now and the head family wouldnt exactly lie down and let it happen. big mess. so um tldr as most of my naruto opinions go: neji was right, sasuke was right, fuck hiashi, fuck the hyuga, and fuck konoha.
i am so fucking sorry at how long this reply is by the way
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