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[epochryphal]

an intersection: im probably demisexual. i want sex but it bores me, and i cant connect with most sexual images out of dysphoria and deminess. however, being kin with dirk strider can jump that gap. i can get off when im being dirk, but i really struggle if im being me/not-dirk. yeah like. being kin/being ace/being allo. all the same thing somehow. (i hate the ace/allo dichotomy)

dichotomy!  a good word, yes, thank you.  also, relatable.

it’s interesting how dysphoria works with kin stuff in different ways?  for me, sometimes it amps it up, and sometimes it totally dials it down.  (and different kinds of dysphoria, too, right, body-sex-characteristics or body-non/human-characteristics or body-something-else or gender-perception-by-others or all sorts of things.)

and yeah, ace/allo was… never supposed to be a sharp divide, grey-aces have always been around (and accused of sexualizing allos, because by thinking we’re “less sexual” than they are we’re hyperbolizing them… which is faulty reasoning?  even if “most” people “aren’t that sexual,” there isn’t harm in finding affirmation in a word and way to find community to talk about similar experiences, and using an identity word isn’t innately passing a judgment on people who don’t – which is a behavior issue in that many people do then pass judgment!  but that’s not an issue of the word/experience, that’s… an issue of people.)

(similarly i think the rigidity around Kin/Not Kin and the here-are-these-other-things and describe-yourself-correctly is, self-defeating and… people will self-select into the word/community that feels right and helps them find like-minded folks with similar experiences.  that’s, how this goes.)

but basically - yeah!  things being tied together and related and kinda messy kinda weirdly tidy, and.  mindframes and mindstates and models and narratives and, learning how to maneuver those as is best useful for you.  hella.  thank you for sharing!