#hears how dangerous it is quietly shaking her head in the background
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groundbreakingdot872 · 2 years ago
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will never get over how much genuine trust and stability Gwen and Arthur afforded each other in their relationship even before they were married
the parallel from ‘Castle of Fyrien’ and ‘Lamia’ is my favorite
from Merlin having to persuade Gwen to tell Arthur about what was troubling her, and Arthur immediately soothing her worries with “You did the right thing. Your brother will come to no harm I promise.”
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and after the whole ordeal, when Gwen summons the courage to thank him, still burdened by the fact why he went to so many pains to help her, he quietly reassures her with her own words:
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just like he had in ‘Queen of Hearts’- Arthur is quick to remind Gwen that he would give his love, pains and life for her, endlessly and without a second thought.
and then in s4 when the two are on much steadier ground, content in the future they want together and within Camelot.
when Gwen finds Mary distressed and terrified at her door, she immediately runs to the only person she knows can steady her every worry: Arthur (who just so happens to be the King and has every resource at his disposal but that’s a plus 🤭)
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arwen are in their element here, co-ruling and alleviating their people’s troubles, even before Gwen had ascended the throne.
Their relationship is built on trust and never faltered, it’s built on Arthur’s small glances in Gwen’s direction to ensure he’s doing the right thing, and her soft touches at his side. It’s present every time Gwen worries she’s bringing him trouble, borne from a self-realiance she learned early, and his easy smiles when he patiently reminds her that her worries are all he cares about, and nothing could be insurmountable when it came to them, facing it together ���
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toxicanonymity · 2 years ago
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No outbreak au where reader sends joel either nudes or a video because she's being extra bratty due to joel neglecting her for work. Cue a grumpy frustrated joel ready to come home give his girl exactly what she needs.
daddy Joel one shot
2.4k / joel miller x f!reader / master list
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mood board by milla-frenchy 🖤
Summary: You've been bad. See ask.
WARNINGS: Big girthy age gap, mean brat-tamer-ish Joel (I do not write official kinks that follow rules), use of "daddy" and pet names, Joel is a little rough with you, hair pulling, hand swatting, manhandling, degradation, blow job, unsafe p in v, blindfold, dubcon breeding.  NO use of Y/N.
next: a day in the filth
You get bored and send Joel a sexy picture.  You don't have class and don't expect him home until 5:30 or later. He works at headquarters nearby most days. You can sometimes bait him home for lunch, but not lately, and it upsets you.  He’s working on a big project and says he just can’t get away. He’s warned you--he needs to focus.  
He texts you back. "What the hell are you doin’?" When you don't answer, he sends a video.  You squeeze your thighs together before you open it, anticipating a stern warning about what he’s gonna do to you when he gets home.  Usually, the video is from his office with the door closed.  Occasionally, it's from the bathroom if he wants to show you what you do to him instead of tell you what he'll do to you. 
When you open this video, he's standing outside in front of a chain link fence and cement is being poured in the background.  He’s wearing the shirt and tie he left home in this morning, but also a hardhat.  He has one hand on his hip with the sleeve rolled up.  "Tryin' to piss me off so I toss you around? That it, baby doll? 'Cause all ya gotta do is ask daddy real nice."  He points a finger at you.  "You better cut it out." A crane starts beeping in the background as he ends the video. 
You send your own video back. "I just miss you, Daddy." You're still on his bed, lying on your side, pouting.  Your nipples are poking through your thin, lace camisole.  Joel starts typing but stops and doesn't ever send anything.
Around 6:00 when you hear Joel park in the driveway, you look out the window.  He comes around the front of his truck toward the house.  His face is tense, his tie has been loosened, his forearms are pumped up.  He’s unbuckling his belt as he walks, which sends a rush of need between your legs.  Downstairs, the door opens then slams shut. His boots thud across the floor until he takes them off.  As he makes his way up the stairs, his unfastened belt jingles and his feet land loudly with each step. 
The bedroom door is open.  His hands are clenched into fists when he enters and crosses the room.  As he reaches the bed, he stops and puts his hands on his hips. His body is tense. He demands, "'the hell is wrong with you?" He stands next to the bed and glowers at you as he unbuttons his pants. The intensity in his eyes goes right between your legs.  He continues, "You know how dangerous a construction site is? Gonna get me killed sendin' shit like that." 
You sit up. "Sorry, Daddy," you say quietly as you sit up. You reach out for him. "I didn't kno-" he firmly grabs your wrist then throws your hand away.  
His chest heaves. He grabs you by the hair and makes you look at him. 
"Course ya didn't. . .Don't think about anything but this cock, do ya?" 
Unsure if the question is rhetorical, you shake your head timidly, as best you can with his fist still holding your hair.
His face remains stern as he tugs you toward the edge of the bed. "On your knees." He releases your hair and you nod. 
You fall to your knees on the floor. One strap of your cami falls down, exposing your breast. You don't fix it. 
You reach for the growing bulge in his pants. He swats your hand away, then abruptly and firmly takes your chin in his hand to look up at him.  He gives you a small shake as he does it.
"Daddy's in charge. Daddy knows best." 
You nod. 
"Gonna be a patient little doll, aren't ya?"  You nod again. 
"Good girl."  He rubs the front of his pants, depriving you of feeling how hard he's getting for you.  He sucks in a chest full of air through his nose. With his free hand, he grabs your breast, pushing it and kneading it flatly into your chest. He growls.  You look straight up as he looms over you, massaging your breast and his considerable bulge at the same time. "What am I gonna do with you?" He looks you over and shakes his head in disapproval. "You're too bored, aren't ya? Lie here thinkin' about this cock all goddamn day.” You salivate watching him stroke his pants.  “I told ya, you need a hobby."
Maybe that's what you do some days--the days you don't have class. Better than being back with your family.
"I'm not bored," You shake your head. “just miss you sometimes.” 
"Now, listen. You wanna stay here? You better get pregnant or get a job. Are we clear?"
You swallow and nod hesitantly.
“Spoiled brat like you don’t want a job,” he adds.  "So I’m gonna be nice and help ya with the first option.”
He releases your breast and urgently unzips his pants. "’Cause I’ve waited long enough for it, baby. Daddy knows best." He pulls down his boxers and wraps his veiny hand around his commanding cock.   You nod.  You wet your lips and pry your eyes from his cock to meet his gaze. 
"Look at you. Already droolin', aren't ya?" His voice is dark and low. He's snarling.  "Open that dirty little mouth." You do as you're told. He puts one hand on the back of your head and steps forward to put his cock in your mouth. You long to lick and suck the tip, but you're not in charge. You open as wide as you can and he guides his cock between your lips. He keeps going until it's nearly to the back of your throat, then he lays it onto your tongue. "Go 'head, now."
You bring both your hands to his cock to hold it steady.  Having it in your mouth makes you throb with desire. You seal your lips around the smooth shaft and begin to suck. 
"Good girl."
He holds your head in both hands and guides you on his cock. You suck and lick the underside strongly. His hips rock into you.  When you try to let some of his shaft out so you can suckle on the tip, he grabs your hair as he pulls your head back toward him.  "Watch it," he says coldly. Instead, you suck from the back or your throat. The fullness of your mouth and throat prickles your eyes with tears.  You're so wet, you long to touch yourself.  You take one hand off his cock and start to reach down, but he catches your hand and brings it back to where it was.
“Nuh-uh.  Don’t you dare. Not unless Daddy says.” 
After a minute of sucking his cock, you begin to taste his precum, one of your favorite tastes in the world. He says, "That's all, baby." He takes it from your mouth and it hits your chin on its way down.  
—-
Joel steps out of his pants and leaves his stiff cock and balls hanging over his boxers.  You sit there on your knees awaiting instruction. He crouches down to the floor and firmly grabs you by both arms. "Get up," he growls and forces you to your feet with an emphatic shake of your arms at the end.  Then he looks you up and down and pushes you backwards onto the bed. You catch yourself with your forearms and elbows.
He wraps a big hand around his cock again and looks at your desperate, hungry face. He's still wearing his shirt and tie.  He leans over you to yank your sleep shorts down below your knees. Then steps one foot between your legs, pressing his foot down on the shorts to take them off completely.   He spreads your thighs, then kneels between them. He puts his hands down on the bed near your arms and hovers over you. His tie falls onto your chest. He supports himself with one arm while he unknots the tie, slides it out, and drops it onto the bed. He unbuttons his shirt, and you marvel at how the muscles of his supporting arm stretch the fabric. As he finishes the last button, you reach out for his bicep. 
He catches you by the wrist again.  "What are you doin?"  He throws your hand down. 
You're quiet. 
"Who’s in charge?" He stands up and takes off the button-down. Your desire throbs as his chest and biceps emerge in just a tight undershirt.
"I forgot," you say. “You just look so nice.” 
He fumes, "Forgot who’s in charge? Alright, know what?" He grabs the tie. "Let's remove temptation. C'mere. Sit up."
—-
You sit up on the bed, and he ties it as a blindfold around your eyes. “There ya go.”  His hand on your chest pushes you down on your back again. He sits up on his knees to look between your legs, and he marvels at your glistening cunt.  “Drippin’ all over the place, baby.”
He holds his massive cock above your cunt, gripping it loosely with just two fingers and a thumb on the lower half of the shaft.  He drop the smooth tip heavily onto your clit, then he rapidly moves his cock it up and down, hitting you clit and teasing you with the rhythmic contact.  You whimper, and tension swells in your abdomen.  You gasp and bite your lip.  You tilt your hips, trying to catch it with your leaking cunt.  
“Good girl,” he says, then notches it at your entrance.  He begins to push inside, and you gasp at the stretch.  He doesn’t wait.  He pushes in a little more.  Once he’s far enough in to stay in, he braces his hands on the bed above your shoulders then shoves his length into you with a drawn-out groan that makes you twitch around him before your walls have fully made room.  You can only imagine the look on his face.  He pushes furthe, as deep as he can, with all his weight behind his pelvis. Your body's still trying to catch up. "God damn," he sighs. "Loosen up for Daddy.” You try your best to relax. 
He slowly retreats then slams his thick length to the hilt with a low grunt.  "Good girl.”  He repeats the motion, sliding into you, splitting you open with the help of your ample slick. The smooth fabric of the tie feels nice, but you wish you could see how hot he looks.  His face of pleasure is one to behold. 
“Please let me see you, dadd-.”
"No," he replies coldly without hesitation. He punctuates it with a powerful thrust into your depths. “Not this time.” He pulls back most of his length.  
Your lip trembles and you bite it to keep from crying.
He sighs loudly as he fills you up again. "Keep takin' it like a good girl, and next time you can watch." 
He braces himself with a forearm on the bed near your head as he keeps pounding you. He urgently pulls down your camisole so  both your breasts are out.  He palms one hungrily as he thrusts into you and breathes heavily. He plants his mouth on your neck and sucks hard.  Then he aggressively kisses your lips and your mouth thirstily accepts his.   At this angle, he’s grinding into your clit.  Your hips lift and your back arches as he kisses you and presses against your most sensitive place with each thrust.  He feels you getting close and breaks the kiss with a moan.  
“Go ‘head, baby.   You can come.” He fills you with his cock a few more times, then you whimper as pleasure pulses outward from your clit, making you spasm around his length.  
“Oh, Daddy,” you whimper as you come.  “Ohh,” you moan. Your waves continue and your hips lift into his.  
He groans as your cunt chokes his cock.  Then his breathing becomes heavier, more desperate.   “That’s right, baby,”  he breathes.  You would give anything to see his face.  But even without the view, you can feel his climax approaching in his voice and breathing. He lays a massive hand on your lower stomach.  "Gonna fill you up,” he pants.  "Make this belly round."  He moans and his cock begins to twitch.  “Show everyone who’s Daddy’s good girl.” He slows his hips.
“Fuck,” he says between heavy breaths.  He retreats one more time then slams all the way into you and his cock begins to pulse massively.  
You moan, and your cunt twitches again.  “Oh, Daddy.”
He quickly puts you in a mating press before plunging to the hilt again, filling you with a huge load.  One more thrust as he empties his balls and you gasp and pant.  He stays in position and sighs, then begins to catch his breath.  “Good girl,”  he whispers.  “You can look now.”
You move the necktie up to your eyebrows and watch him hovering over you with his face pink, hair sticky, neck vein bulging. His eyes sparkle as he looks at you.  He lays a hand on your stomach again.  His chest is still heaving under his white understhirt, and his biceps stretch the sleeves. “Fuck, you’re pretty,” he says.  “You’re gonna be the death of me, baby,” he laughs.  His face darkens.  “‘specially if you don’t stop textin’ dirty when I’m workin’.”
“Sorry, Daddy,” you whisper earnestly.
“I forgive you. Know why?”
“Why”
“‘Cause you took this cock so good.” He rocks his hips into you one last time, making you gasp as he pushes his cum deeper.  Then he very slowly pulls out.  He puts a big pillow under your butt. “Don’t you move, now. ” He lays down next to you on the bed, head in his hand, and watches you look at him with affection.  He kisses your cheek and says, "that's my girl." He gently strokes your chest and fondles your breasts, occasionally kissing you. 
"Are you still mad," you ask. 
"I don't think I can stay mad at ya, baby." He closes his eyes and kisses you long and deep. “Take my cock too good."
-
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Thank you so much for reading and engaging! Every comment and reblog means a lot and also helps me recognize you in the wild on Tumblr. (Plus, unabashed dope(amine) addict here 😫 )
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Ask was from April, ty for your patience Anon 🖤
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ofstoriesandstardust · 4 months ago
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can't take the home out of oklahoma - iiii. (k.c.)
a/n: dear God the behemoth of the crossover fic is finally finished. please remember to be kind in my comments, but of course i'd love to hear what everyone thought :). if you're new here, you can check out the other three parts here
summary: Two years after leaving California, Tyler hears from Jake, asking him to come to his engagement party. With an offer of putting the whole crew up in a hotel for two nights and an off-season lull, Tyler accepts. Two years after leaving California, you finally have to confront Javy. 
warnings: background iceman and hangster, happy ending, alcohol, swearing, please remember we are all the villains in someone's story thank you
word count: 13.2k
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“So, I was thinking-” 
“Dangerous thing.” Kate mutters around a bite of waffle, prompting a fit of giggling from the two of you as Tyler narrows his eyes. 
“-I was thinking, instead of heading out to Arkansas straight after the end of the season, we take a road trip.”
“Where you thinking T?” Boone asks as you pick up your coffee cup. 
“San Diego, California.” 
You freeze, eyes flickering over to the blonde over the rim of your coffee cup, thankful you hadn’t taken a sip of the hot liquid yet. 
“What the hell, Owens?” You ask tersely, setting the mug down harder than you intend to, the brown liquid sloshing over the side. 
Tyler is pointedly avoiding your look as he sighs, shoulders deflating. “Look, my brother called. He- He’s getting married.” 
Your eyebrows shoot up. “To Bradley?” 
He nods, confirming. “Anyways, they’re having an engagement party out at Brad’s godfather’s. Jake’s invited us, all of us. Offered to put us all up in a hotel for two nights. I was uh- thinking about going.” 
“I think I’ll sit this out.” You say quietly, pushing your chair out. 
“Yeah, I ain’t so sure it’s the best idea to throw her into all of that.” Dani says, Lilly nodding alongside her. 
The girls had been told the story of your fiery departure from your hometown one night this past season, motel beds pushed together, wine drunk and cheap pizza forgotten. You’d told Dexter a week later, while you remarked on your ex-boyfriend’s love for a Louisiana crab boil, after you all had crossed into Louisiana to follow a storm. 
“Jake asked specifically about you.” Tyler admits quietly. 
You sigh, glancing up at the ceiling. “I don’t think the rest of them care to see me.” 
“We’ll make it work, okay? I ain’t gonna let anybody come at you.” Tyler pleads and you sigh again. 
You look at him for a moment but that’s all you need. It’s clear that Jake reaching out, asking him to come to this monumental event, means a great deal to him and you know as his family, it’s only right to step up to the plate for Tyler, no matter how uncomfortable it might make you. 
You know Tyler would do the same for you in a heartbeat. 
“Okay, T.  I’ll go with you guys.” 
His grin is splitting as Boone whoops, already chattering about the beach. 
“I ain’t promising to be nice to them.” 
Your words don’t even phase Tyler.
“Wouldn’t even dreaming of asking that of you, kid.”
-
The blue water sparkles as you peer out the window, the golden sunlight making it shine. 
“Jesus, I forget how blue it is.” You whisper to yourself as you take in downtown. 
The skyscrapers peer down back at you, the boats in the bay dotted across the docks. In the distance, you can see the outlines figures of the USS Midway and the Star of India. 
“How you feeling?” 
You shake your head, looking back at Kate. “It’s weird, kind of. Disorientating. I remember the first time I came home from college, it’s kind of like that. It all looks the same but the world kept turning after you left. Life kept going even though you’re not there to witness it.” 
She reaches out to squeeze your hand from the back of the truck. “I get what you mean.” 
Tyler glances at the two of you from his position in the drivers seat. The group had elected to take the van and your car, the SUV you’d bought last winter after you’d gotten sick of sharing Kate’s own storm chasing truck. 
Tyler’s red truck and Kate’s pickup had just not suited themselves to a cross country road-trip, which led you and Kate to driving most of the way. Tyler had finally corralled you into giving him the keys, under the condition you would sit passenger seat and give him directions. 
“Hey T, can we stop and get food before this thing?” 
Boone’s voice crackles over the radio and Tyler grabs it. You hadn’t really needed a radio of your own, but Boone and Tyler had insisted, outfitted the whole thing themselves. It sort of made you feel like a kid again, shouting across the room with your siblings in lieu of having walkie talkies while you played — everything followed with an OVER.
“I think they’re gonna feed us there Booney.” 
“Tyler, I am a starved woman. You rushed us out of breakfast this morning and we’ve been up before the sun was. It’s almost three in the afternoon and California already said we’ve got a decent drive across the city to get to this place. We’re stopping.” Dani’s voices comes through and Kate lets out a laugh from her seat. 
“Know any good places California?” 
You light up at Boone’s question, reaching for the radio but Tyler holds it just out of reach. 
“If you suggest In-N-Out one more time, I will drive this car into the ocean, so help me God.”
-
Niall Horan’s voice floats softly through the speakers as the car creaks to a stop in front of a familiar house. 
Your stomach flips as the barbecue from a locally owned joint near your Mom’s threatens to resurface. You distantly recall telling the group you’d been friends with the owners daughter in high school in a sad attempt to drown out Boone’s loud voice saying it would never be as good as Cathy’s. 
“You good California?” Javi asks and you startle, not even having realized you’d pulled yourself from the car. “You’re looking a little queasy there.” 
“Nerves.” You breathe and Kate takes your hand, squeezing it. 
“Thought you said they were nice.” Lilly says. 
“They are.” Just not to me. 
“This is quite the affair.” Dexter comments, glancing around the street as you walk up the road. “There’s hardly any spaces left.” 
“Bradley’s family is big.” You blurt out. “Lots of retired pilots who are probably thrilled to see their Baby Goose get married. Lots of friends from the service too I’m guessing.” 
“I wouldn’t want to be footing the bill for that wedding.” Dani whistles. 
The group begins to chatter and you wince, feeling your stomach roll as you step onto the grass. 
“You got this.” Kate whispers as you follow Tyler to the front porch. Tyler reaches out to press the doorbell, only to pull back at the last second. 
You raise your eyebrows. You don’t think you’ve seen the Tyler Owens cower back down from anything, much less a doorbell separating him from his twin. 
“You do it.” He says to you, stepping back.
“Me do it?” You ask incredulously. “You want to be kicked out before we ever step foot inside?” 
“I’ll do it.” Kate volunteers. She rings the doorbell, a short buzz followed by the sound of an I got it Mom! from somewhere inside behind the closed door. 
The door opens a few minutes later, revealing the now-taller daughter of Penny Benjamin. She blinks at the rag-tag crew. “Can I help you?” 
“Hi. I’m Kate and this is Tyler, we’re here for-“ Kate cuts herself off under the rather impressive stare of Amelia. Kate tugs on your arm, pulling you into view. “Here, you talk to the scary teenager.” 
“Hi Amelia.” You say softly. 
Amelia’s face lights up at the sight of you, exclaiming your name, drawing the attention of Tom as he rounds the corner to see who was at the door. Tom appears over her shoulder, nudging the girl back inside the house. 
“Tell Jake his brother’s here!” Tom calls after her before turning his attention back to your crew. “You must be Tyler and his crew. Jake mentioned that you guys would be stopping by. They’re all out in the back playing dogfight football.” 
Dogfight football? Tyler mouths to you as you all step inside the foyer. You shrug at his confused look. 
Long story you mouth back. 
“Anyways, I’m Tom, I’m one of Brad’s godfathers. I can take you all out to the back to meet the group?” 
You let your friends filter in front of you, hanging by the entrance to the kitchen and living room area. 
-
“I’m just gonna…” You mutter, letting your friends file out the glass door after Amelia and Tom. Penny gives you an unimpressed look from where she catches sight of you at the kitchen island and you give a sheepish shrug, feeling your cheeks heat up. “Selfish self-perseveration, sue me.” 
Pete glances up at you from one of the cabinets at the sound of your voice, lighting up as he does. “Well kid, I do have to say we never expected to see you again.” He holds out his arms and you grin, taking the invitation for a hug. 
If there was anything you’d learned about Pete Mitchell in the two and a half years you’d spent around his pilots, was that he offered Dad hugs to anyone at any chance he got. And boy, were they some of the safest hugs you’d ever had. 
“Hi Pete.” You say into his shoulder as he squeezes you. 
He pulls back, studying you. His thumb ghosts over a new scar on your cheek (thanks to an ill-timed rocket from Boone) and taking in the new piercings. “You look good kid.” 
“Thanks.” You breathe, unable to stop the genuine smile at earning his approval. 
His hand rests on your shoulder, guiding you farther into the kitchen. “Nick and Carole are outside with Coyote’s Dad and brother getting all the fixings grilled up. Do you want anything to drink?” 
You pause, stopping next to Javy’s Mom Lydia. You swallow, unsure of how she’ll react to you as you tell Pete you don’t want anything. He nods, grabbing his glass and nudging Penny towards the back patio after her daughter. 
“Hi Lydia.” You say softly. She studies you for a moment before pulling you into a tight hug. You melt into her touch, knowing you had accepted you may never get it again. 
You think of all the times you’d gotten the same hug from her, the innate soft care and compassion the woman had offered you, the same one she’d passed down to her son. 
You pull back, smiling at Javy’s sister-in-law (it seems like James had finally put a ring on it) and the little boy she holds in her arms. “Hi Scarlet.” 
The girl gives you a big grin. “How you doing?” 
“I’m good.” You answer. “Yeah, I’ve been good.” 
She smiles. “Good to hear.” She glances over Lydia’s shoulder. “Would you want to hold baby Jameson here for a minute while Dia and I go grab something from outside?” 
Your eyes grow wide. “You want me to hold your baby?” 
She shrugs. “I trusted you enough back then, I doubt I can’t trust you now.” 
You swallow, nodding. “Yeah, yeah of course.” You take the boy gingerly from her arms as he grins up real big at you. The boy only has two teeth but it looks like the nub of a third is growing in. “You and James make really cute babies.”
“I know.” She says smugly, before heading outside with Lydia.
You bounce the baby in your arms gently, cooing at him softly. 
“I sort of feel like I’m watching some alternate version of my future right now.” You gasp, whipping towards the sound of the voice. 
Leaning up against the doorjamb is Javy. 
The same Javy you’d fallen in love with all those years ago, a fond and yet pained smile on his face as he sticks his hands in his pockets. 
“Self preservation doesn’t work if you’re not outside with all your friends.” You breathe out as Jameson starts making grabby hands for his uncle. Javy walks towards the boy, letting him take his finger. It quickly becomes his new favorite chew toy as he shrugs. 
You snort as Javy smiles down at the kid. “Wanted to change. Scarlet knew I was in here so now I’m kinda figuring she left him here with you so we’d have to be civil.” You swallow, all humor leaving you as your eyes dart around the kitchen. 
In all the years you’d been gone, the Mitchell-Kazansky house hadn’t changed all that much. Maybe there were a few more pictures on the fridge, a coupon for a new pizza place, new throw pillows on the same worn couch, but the small beach front property that was inherently them had remained the same. 
“I don’t- I never expected- How are you here?” Javy asks, finally landing on words after a minute of silence and restarted attempts. 
“Jake’s brother.” You say quietly. “I’ve been working with Tyler in Oklahoma.” 
Javy reels back, Jameson letting go of his finger as he does. The toddler is quick to shift his attention to your hair, tugging on it. You wince. “Okay, I probably deserve this.” You mutter after a particularly hard yank from the toddler’s fist. 
Javy snorts, and you think it surprises him as much as it does you as a shy, goofy smile flickers on his face. “In another life, you were probably his auntie.” 
The words are meant to be light-hearted but they’re like an iron punch as the breath gets knocked clean from your lungs. 
“Javy-“ 
“Sorry, that wasn’t funny.” He dismisses as he crosses his arms. “So- Oklahoma huh? You liking it? The countryside is the last place I expected you to end up but you, uh- you look like you’re doing well.” 
You swallow around the lump that’s growing in your throat at the grief you’re having to confront earlier than you had anticipated. 
“I- Yeah, I like it out there. I’m good. Happy.” 
“I’m actually uh, not surprised to hear it. That you’re in Oklahoma. Just surprised at finally getting the confirmation.” 
“What do you mean?” 
“Well, about a year ago, Fanboy had one of their streams on. He was just a casual fan, you know, background noise. The camera couldn’t have been on you for more than thirty seconds but I swore it was you. I made him go back and replay it a hundred times, I pulled up a hundred examples from other videos on the channel. The team was so convinced I was starting to lose it that Fanboy got banned from playing those streams anymore. Your hair was shorter in that first video, but I just- I knew it was you.” 
You hum, thinking to yourself. You’d appeared in the background of streams and edited videos countless times, but there had only been one haircut in two years. “It must’ve been after the rocket incident.” 
His eyes go wide. “The rocket incident?” 
“Boone still feels bad and Ty won’t let anyone really bring it up because it makes his blood pressure rise but imagine my surprise when I’m fiddling with something on top on the truck and Boone leans over on the console and accidentally sets off a rocket.” 
“That would only happen to you.” 
You snort. “I know. Most of the hair on one side was singed off anyways so I took the kitchen shears we have and chopped it all off in the back of the RV after we left urgent care.”
A beat passes as he drums his fingers against the countertop. “Hey, how long are you in town for?” 
“We’re supposed to leave sometime tomorrow, we’re gonna stop off in Vegas. Why?” 
“I was gonna see if you wanted to stop by the house. I’ve still got, actually quite a lot of your stuff. Like keepsakes and stuff your Mom tried to get rid of. If you wanted to swing by on your way out and pick through it.”
You nod. “Yeah, I should be able to fit that in.” You reach a hand out, nudging his shoulder. “Hey, how was Bob and Sophia’s wedding?” 
“The kind of classy country you can only imagine. It was so them.”
“Did you cry?” You tease and he ducks his head. 
“Maybe shed a tear or two.” 
“Hey, how’s your Mom?” You ask softly.
You remember all too well Javy getting that phone call. 
Four days before you were meant to defend your Masters thesis, Javy had gotten a call from his Mom, telling him that she had been diagnosed with DCIS — breast cancer. 
It had been non-invasive, thankfully, and after a quickly scheduled surgery, Lydia had expected to have a full recovery. 
Still — it had been a terrifying few weeks for Javy and you’d written out and deleted a hundred text messages to him on each anniversary of the diagnosis. 
“She’s good.” He says softly. “Still no signs of a return. Thanks for asking.” 
You nod. “I think about her a lot. And you, you know. How you all are doing. If she’s healthy, if you’re safe.” 
His eyes shine with a feeling you can’t quite name, but can describe only as a response to hearing words he never thought he’d hear but mean more to him then he’ll ever admit. 
“I think about you too. If you’re happy, if you’re happier than you were with me. If you found what it was you had been searching for.” He shakes his head, clearing your throat. “Grieving someone who was still alive-“ He lets out a low whistle. 
“I’m sorry.” You whisper. You know he hears you but he doesn’t say anything, letting the two of you exist in silence as baby Jameson babbles nonsensically.
“I can’t help but ask — you dating anyone?” 
The questions feels so stilted as you swallow. You knew he was trying to play at some cool nonchalance but he missed by a mile; it was obvious your answer meant a great deal to him. “I am.” He raises his eyebrows, clearly waiting for more information. “I have a girlfriend.” 
“What’s this girlfriend’s name?” 
You shake your head. “Don’t think it’s appropriate to bring her into this.” 
He sighs, letting his weight rest against the kitchen island. “I guess that’s fair. You were always more mature than me about stuff.”
The two of you sit in an awkward silence for a few minutes, the hollers of his friends from the back patio coming closer. You have a hundred questions for him and he probably has a thousand more for you but you both know you can’t ask them in this moment. His team must have come up off the beach and would probably be headed inside soon. His eyes flicker towards the back door, probably making the same assumptions as you. 
“Hey, do- do you think we could talk sometime tonight?” Your eyes flicker over to him, seeing the pain in them so clear. It feels unnatural to not reach out and smooth out the lines in between his eyebrows. “Now’s not the time but I- uh-“ He cuts himself off, shaking his head. 
You nod. “Yeah, we can. Just- later, okay?” 
You owed him closure. After the way you’d left, with the way you’d burned him, you owed him that at the very least.
Kate would understand. 
The backdoor slides open, the pilots shuffling in. Behind them, you can see the Wranglers, save for Kate and Tyler, take hesitant seats on the couches. It looks like Dexter’s still outside.
“Holy shit!” Omaha yells, sliding his sunglasses up. The pilots turn, a bunch of oohs being tossed up. 
“Does anybody else get the weird feeling we walked into some weird alternate timeline where her and Coyote got married and had kids?” Payback asks and Javy lets out a low groan. 
“Aliens.” Fanboy breathes out and his pilot tosses him a strange look. 
“It’s like seeing a ghost.” Natasha comments. 
“Yeah, a really bitchy ghost.” Omaha adds and you turn sharply, plopping the toddler into his uncle’s arms. 
“Would you look at that, some things really do never change. I still really hate your friends.” 
“Can I have a hug?” Jake blurts out, silencing his friends. 
You raise an eyebrow as you give him a once-over. “Um, I guess. If you put a shirt on first.”
Mickey hits his pilot as Jake disappears around the corner. “My alien theory isn’t so weird now, is it?” 
Payback winces, rubbing his stomach where Mickey had smacked him. “Nice to see you too Mickey.” You say, rounding the kitchen island. 
The boy gives you a nervous smile. It’s an odd look on the boy who’d always greeted you with a wide grin, home-cooked food, and a picture of his new Lego set. It’s an odd look for the kid who’d probably been your favorite of Javy’s friends, and definitely the closest to you, so long as no one said that in front of Bradley. (Bradley Bradshaw had taken it upon himself to name his role in your life as unintentional big brother). “Hey.” 
Jake reappears, having tugged one of Bradley’s old Top Gun shirts over his head. “Hi.” He says softly, stopping in front of you. “Can I have a hug now?” 
You sigh. “Fine, I guess.” 
You’re not sure what you’re expecting from Jake (a hug certainly wasn’t on the table) but his hug is tight, borderline painful as you hesitantly and awkwardly wrap your arms around his much larger and taller frame. You step back as someone clears their throat. Jake lets you go willingly as Boone reaches out for your wrist, tugging you to sit down in between him and Dani. 
Jake turns, facing the person who’s just walked into the house. 
“Knock knock.” She says and your head turns, catching sight of Lainey’s blond hair. Javi reaches around Boone, nudging your back, reminding you to breathe as Jake’s face lights up. “Wait, there’s two of you?” 
“Lainey! Didn’t think you’d make it! Yeah, uh, this is my twin brother Tyler. We, uh don’t talk much.” 
“Oh, we know.” You say under your breath, only loud enough for your friends to hear, and Boone spits out a laugh, Javi having to cough into his fist to cover up his own laughter. 
Tyler snaps, eyes narrowing, turning to you. “I thought you’d agreed to being on your best behavior.” 
“I didn’t say anything!” You defend, which elicits a loud laugh from Dani as Lilly throws out a “Stop being so hard on her T!” 
Tyler huffs, his hands fall to his waist and you have to bite back a giggle that eventually falls out anyways when you see Kate doing the same thing.
“You’re such a Dad, T.” You say through a laugh, shaking your head which elicits laughter from the whole group. 
Lainey turns as you talk, face softening. “I didn’t think any of us would ever see you again. Where you’ve been?” 
“Oklahoma!” Javy shouts from across the kitchen. It sends his friends into an uproar, reeling from the fact. 
“See, my aliens theory is looking more and more true!” 
-
Kate doesn’t want to admit that her stomach drops at the sight of your ex quietly slipping out the door after you but she knows it’s warranted given the way all his friends notice. 
“What’re the odds she gives Javy another chance?” Jake’s fiancé asks Jake. Jake lets out some discontented noise from the back of his throat before pushing himself off his seat on the floor and meandering into the kitchen. 
“I will put money on her coming back. I’m so Team Javy, you know this.” One of the other pilots (Fanboy, her brain recalls). 
“I’m team her staying in Oklahoma with her girlfriend. She’s earned that quiet life.” One of the girlfriends (Kaycee, she’s dating Phoenix, you’d run through all the possible attendees with her and Tyler in the car this morning in the quiet calm, dawn barely peaking over the horizon) pipes up with. 
“Of course you’re on her side.” One of the others says. “You always liked her more than the rest of us.” 
Kaycee’s eyes slide up to the man. “Well yeah, Payback, I was the one consoling at her at every group event when Hangman came down on her and made her feel unwanted. So of fucking course I don’t want her to get back together with the guy
whose friends made her feel like shit.” 
“You take that too seriously, K. We were obviously just fooling around, not our fault she’s too sensitive.” 
The girl’s eyes narrow at the man. “Omaha, so help me-“ 
“She’s not your piece of meat to fight over!” Dani finally bursts. The in-fighting stops abruptly as the attention turns to them. “I’m just saying- if she’s happy, can’t you just leave her be? She’s a person, not some object for y’all to fight about.” 
The group all but forgets Dani even said anything when the one with the glasses turns back to Bradley. “You really think she’ll take Javy back?”
“A hundred percent. You remember how she used to look at him. And he was ass over teacups for her. Remember that year she bought him the Saints jersey with his last name on the back and he near lost his mind the first time she stole it to wear?” 
“Dude, he wasn’t half as bad dating as he was before. Remember the first time he brought her to the Hard Deck and he insisted he buy every drink for her?” Mickey chimes in. 
“I remember when they came to the house for the first time to watch a movie and Mickey kept teasing her about not doing anything on the couch, I thought Coyote was gonna drown Mick in the pool. He was so desperate to impress her and yelled at us for potentially making it so she never talked to him again.” Bob adds through a laugh. “Which she totally did, she fucking loved him from the first time they matched. Remember how his hands used to start sweating cause he got so nervous around her?” 
She glances at Javi and Boone next to her, glad to see her own unease is mirrored on their faces. Lilly’s reminder from earlier resurfaces in her mind as she plays with tab on her soda can. 
She loves you Kate. She wouldn’t go anywhere in the world you ain’t. 
“Coyote’s always had a way with words around her. He’ll say the right thing, tell her he’ll miss her, and she’ll come back just like she was always meant to.” Phoenix comments and she swallows, looking down at her jeans. 
Javi and Boone both stand up next to her, a whispered conversation happening she doesn’t care to try and hear as their exit goes unnoticed. The discomfort and unease in her stomach grows, feeling her whole world tilt at the thought that someone may say something to make you realize you’d been wrong to come to Oklahoma, wrong to love her, and that you’d go back to the place you had belonged this whole time. 
She catches Tyler’s eye, a stormy look growing on his face. 
I don’t like this, it says. 
She didn’t either. 
-
“See, I’d ask if you’re just taking a breather, but I know you, so you’re definitely hiding.”
Your eyes shoot up at Javy as he gently shuts the front door to the house, moving to sit down on the porch swing across from where you’re resting your weight on the porch railing. 
“Yeah, well, when they start eating my food straight from my hands I think I have to bow out.” 
He grins at the memory. 
Just half an hour ago, you’d been trying to shove Boone off of you as he attempted to take a bite of your burger, crowded up into Lilly and Dani’s space more than they probably ever wanted you to be. Javi had leaned over, taking a huge bite of burger as it had been sitting in your hand farthest away from Boone’s reach and you’d frozen in shock when you’d seen what he’d done out of your periphery. 
Dexter had tried to save face, over the sound of Dani yelling about how foul the move was, by saying that usually the lot of you were much more civilized but Tyler and Kate had immediately refuted it with a unified no, we ain’t. It had been all the encouragement you needed to plop what was left of the burger in Javi’s hand and to disappear outside.
“They seem to really like you. That one, Boone, was telling me we weren’t allowed to have you back. You’re theirs now.” 
You sigh, crossing your arms. “They’re- they’re really good to me. They’re family.” 
“I’ll admit that’s kind of hard to hear. Rooster and Fanboy kinda seem to be under the impression that you still might come back. Mav too. If I play my cards right.” 
You let out another sigh, looking away from him. “Javy, don’t even go there. Please don’t start that with me, cause you aren’t gonna like what I have to say.”
He shifts, bending to lean on his knees as he does his best to catch your eye. “What can I say to fix this? What can I say to convince you to come home?” 
“Oklahoma is my home!” You insist, feeling frustration begin to tighten in your chest. 
“No the hell it isn’t. How many times did you say your heart belonged here? How many times did you say you were meant for city living by the beach? And now you’re telling me that you live on a farm in the middle of buttfuck nowhere Oklahoma and you just what, love your life? I don’t believe that. Not for a minute.”
A whimper of frustration slips out as your hands come down to scrub your face. “Javy.” You say shakily. “I am happy to have any kind of closure conversation you need to have to find peace and move on. But if this is going to be about you trying to convince me to come back to a life I don’t want anymore, then I will go back inside.” You say, mustering up a calm tone you don’t feel and he reels back as if you’ve hit him. 
“I just don’t understand.” He says softly and your shoulders deflate. “I love you. You were my whole world, I wanted everything with you. I don’t understand. Help me understand.” 
His voice cracks and the lump in your throat from earlier reappears. “I was- I was unhappy for a really long time Javy.” 
He immediately shakes his head, cutting you off. “No, no that’s bullshit. I know that’s bullshit. C’mon, was there someone else?” 
“Are you insinuating I fucking cheated on you?” You near shout, straightening up. 
“Well!” He matches the raise in voice, standing up from the porch swing. 
“That’s bullshit.” You say. “If I recall, I was 25, working a dead end barista job because the masters degree I went into thousands of dollars of debt for proved to be useless with a boyfriend who let his friends walk all over me! I didn’t just wake up that day and decide I was miserable Javy! It was a slow build, a build you contributed to!” 
The front door opens and shuts and you spare a glance to see Boone and Javi lingering by the front door. 
Later, they’ll confess to you that the only reason they’d ventured outside to interrupt the conversation is because the pilots inside had gotten so smug in their surety that Javy would convince you to leave Oklahoma to be with him, they’d started to worry about you being alone on the porch. 
Javi had hastily assured you that they didn’t think you couldn’t handle yourself, but he was afraid he’d hit all your guilty spots, Boone sure he’d say all the things you’d wanted to hear back then, and you’d leave the Wranglers without so much as backwards glance. They’d wanted you to know they had your back. 
They’ll admit it was selfish of them and Dani will tell them they’re stupid for not remembering how much you love your life here, and you’ll tell them that you’re not angry, that their intentions had been good. 
All their presence does now in this moment though is piss your ex-boyfriend off as he throws his hands up. “Can’t even have one conversation without your little fucking guard dogs, huh? Little side pieces behind your girlfriend’s back?” 
“Stop it.” You say sternly. “Stop going there. You know I was never unfaithful to you, you know that I never would’ve done that.” 
“I don’t know if I ever knew you at all. Not really. So yeah, who’s to say if you aren’t a cheater if you were quietly miserable enough to dump me and run halfway across the country.”
You groan, rubbing your temples. “God, you’re not listening to me. You didn’t listen to me then, you don’t listen to me now.” 
“All I ever did was fucking listen to you! You never shut up!” 
Boone lets out a “Hey man!” alongside Javi’s “Whoa there.”
“Don’t talk to her like that man.” Boone says. “Have some respect, that there’s a lady and she was a lady you cared a lot about, so be nice.” Boone drawls. 
Your ex fixes him with a glare that would’ve made a weaker man whimper, but Boone isn’t one to back down. He drives into tornados and shoots rockets at them for fuck’s sake. 
Unintentionally or not, Boone’s intervention gives you the pause you need to take a deep breath and collect yourself. “Javy.” You start, softer this time. His eyes snap over to yours. “I understand the anger and frustration and the confusion. I know that I left rather suddenly and I never gave you any explanation as to why. But you have to know, we were fighting all the time and I was so unhappy, not just in my relationship with you, but in my job and myself. And after Texas, I snapped. It was a catalyst event that permanently altered the course of my life.” 
His eyebrows furrow in confusion. “The fuck does Texas have to do with anything?” 
You sigh. “You keep saying that you still love me, yeah? The problem with that Javy is that you’re in love with a version of me that doesn’t exist anymore. That girl that you loved died in Texas and she’s never coming back.” 
“I still don’t understand.” You sigh, licking your lips as you glance at your friends. Javy’s voice is rising again but you know that you’ll never be able to get him to understand the truth without blowing up Jake’s spot. And truthfully, maybe it’s long past due. “We were in love, we were happy, you were my best friend. We go to Texas for Bob’s bachelor party and three days later, you’re dumping me to go hop on a plane to Oklahoma to never be seen again. That doesn’t make any fucking sense! What the hell does Texas have to do with anything?!” 
You move faster than you let your brain think about it, sliding through your friends as you push open the front door, striding through the foyer. You catch Bradley’s eye as you do so and he straightens. “Where the fuck is Jake?” 
Jake comes into view as he shuts the fridge, turning to face you. “What?” He asks tiredly, but judging by the look on his face, you think he already knows. 
“I want you to be honest.” You say, every bit of the calm you’d tried to collect slipping through your grasp as you inch closer to Dani and Lilly. “Tell them the truth about what happened in Texas.” 
“Are we really doing this?” He asks, plopping down on one of the bar stools by the kitchen island. 
“You owe me, Seresin. After everything you put me through, you owe me.” 
Jake sighs, scrubbing a hand down his face as Javy’s head swings wildly between the two of you. 
Just when you’re about to turn and accept the villain narrative these men had decided for you, Jake sighs again. “I asked her to lie about the rodeo.” He says quietly. “We never made it to shelter.” 
“So? A little wind, a little rain, that’s your excuse for going off the deep end?” Javy snaps but Jake isn’t finished. 
“We watched Steven die.” 
The silence that follows is one you never want to experience again as the whole room tunnels in on Jake. Lilly stands up, Dani not far behind her, nudging you towards the door and silently talking over your head to your friends but you feel rooted to your spot. 
“What?” Lainey asks first, pushing her self up as she takes shaky breaths. “You- you saw him die? And you never told me?” 
“Why didn’t you ever tell me that Jake?” Bradley asks quietly, a quiet concern and cool anger laced into the words. 
“I don’t know. I wasn’t thinking. I don’t know if I was trying to protect her or me but I did it anyways. It’s why I gave her Tyler’s number.” He says, finally raising his eyes to meet the room. “I’m the one who gave her Tyler’s info. When she dumped Coyote that day, I knew she was a serious flight risk in more ways than one and I- I knew if I could get her to Tyler, he’d take care of her. I knew she’d be safe with Ty. And I mean obviously he did.” He says, waving a hand at his brother and Kate. “I owed it to her after all this times I said those things about y’alls sex life, all those times I made fun of her behind your back. I mean, everything I said about her age or about how you guys wouldn’t work long-term so you guys would break up-“ Jake cuts himself off, sniffing. “I was awful to her under the guise of trying to be a good friend but I was a rotten friend and a rotten person and I’m sorry.” 
“What the hell is wrong with you?” 
You expect it to be Javy but it’s Tyler and you think you can see his hand shake as he pulls himself off of the couch. 
“Genuinely, you haven’t changed a day. You’re still that same piece of shit you were then, when you couldn’t bother showing up to our grandparents funeral, the people who raised us, because of some stupid little trophy. You’re out here a decade later making a poor girl in her twenties who was simply trying to exist with the guy she loved feel like her life isn’t worth living anymore, that she doesn’t offer anything of value to this world.” 
“But, I mean- it worked out right? she’s been with you guys and she’s happier than she’s ever been in her whole life.” 
“Oh, sure no, it worked out.” Javi intervenes. “If you discount the irreversible trauma and her inherent belief that she would always, eventually, force the people around her to see her as a burden, then yeah, it totally worked out.”
“Which we’re still working on undoing, by the way. Thanks for that. ” Dani comments dryly. 
“Okay, hey, hold on- that’s not all on Jake.” You interrupt and Bradley’s head swings towards you. 
“Are you seriously fucking defending him right now?” 
“I’m defending him because that’s wrong! What Jake did didn’t do anything other than reinforce an idea I have held about myself my whole life, Bradshaw! But you don’t get that, just like you never got it back then! You had two parents who loved you unconditionally and friends and all the support in the world! I’ve never had that! I grew up with a piece of shit family, I grew up with awful friends and an even worse ex-boyfriend, and you people refused to ever understand the life I came from! Don’t pin that all on Jake!” 
Lilly tugs on your arm, telling you to breathe and it’s the first time you realize you’re even crying. 
In a flash, you dig the keys for one of the cars out from Lilly’s pocket, turning on your heel. Your friends call out after you but you don’t listen to them as you wipe tears from your eyes, vision blurry as you make your way towards the car. 
And then someone’s there, wrestling the keys from your grasp. 
It’s Javi.
“I’ll take you wherever you want to go.” He says softly. “I just- don’t want you driving right now.” 
You nod, climbing into the car passenger seat. Once you’re in, Javi reaches over the console to give you a hug. It’s at an awkward angle and you can’t stop crying, but it’s warm and safe and all you need in that moment. 
“You’re gonna be okay, California. We got you.” 
-
“Where did you guys go?” 
Boone asks from his spot on the couch. He’s leaned up against Lilly, feet on Dani’s lap as Dexter putters around the kitchenette in your two bedroom suite Jake had paid for. 
“The beach.” Javi says, setting the keys on the entryway table. 
“Where’s Ty and Kate?” You ask.
It goes eerily quiet. “Um, they had to run an errand.” Boone says after a long minute. 
“I’m too tired to even unpack that.” You say, running a hand down your face. “I’m going to go shower.” 
You slip inside to the bedroom you and Kate had been sharing with Dani and Lilly, walking into the bathroom. After shedding your clothes, you step into the hot water. It soothing against your skin as you bite back a yawn. 
You’d told Javi to pick a beach, any beach, and the two of you had found a picnic table over looking the shore as you looked out at the moonlit waves. 
It had been a quiet, grounding peace that had settled over you as you had reviewed the events of the night. Javi’s quiet voice mixed with the crashing of the waves, soothing you as he talked about Miami, and the Tornado Tamers, and the military, and a hundred different things.
Now though, in the lull of noise, save for the quiet murmurs of your friends through the wall, guilt prickles at you underneath your skin, heavy and all consuming. 
It’s second nature, autopilot, climbing out of the shower and tugging on Kate’s sweatshirt, blindly pulling out a pair of sleep shorts from one of your bags. The bed that had once looked so appealing no longer looks comfortable as you have to work considerably to swallow around the rapidly growing lump in your throat. 
You open the door right as Kate and Tyler return to the hotel room. Tyler gives you a grin as he waves a bag in the air. “Look where we trekked to. Surprise.”
Normally, you would’ve grinned and laughed and said I’d pay good money to see the Midwesterners in an In-N-Out but now all you can do is shrink into Kate’s sweatshirt as you get the overwhelming feeling that you don’t deserve this. 
You don’t deserve Kate, you don’t deserve this team. Not this job you loved so much, not this life you’d carved out for yourself. 
Kate’s face falls as she closes the distance between the two of you. “What’s wrong?” 
“I’m so tired of feeling guilty.” You gasp out, a sob you hadn’t expected coming out. It leaves you scrambling for breath, coming in ragged pants. “I’m tired of feeling guilty for being happy, for having this job, for tricking all of you into thinking that I’m- that I’m worth something. I’m so tired of- of feeling guilty for leaving him and- and I’m tired of feeling guilty for living.”
Kate’s hug is tight, almost as if she lets go, you’ll slip right through her fingers. “Sweetheart.” She whispers into your shoulder as you hesitate to wrap your arms around her. 
“I don’t feel like I deserve it. I don’t feel like I deserve any of it. I didn’t feel like I deserved it then and I don’t feel like I deserve it now.” 
Kate lets you go, a soft look coming over her face as her hands find your face. You feel like you look worse than you ever have, tears sliding down your face, choking on your own words and sobs and snot. 
“Baby…” She says, so soft and tender, in that way that’s all Kate and usually makes you blush, makes you feel more seen then you ever have in your entire life. “You’ve had one hell of a go at life, I’ll admit you got a rough set of cards. But you- you went through something traumatic and you made the only decisions you could at the time. Those people- they’re angry at you because they feel bad for their friend cause he got hurt. And maybe we’re all a villain in someone else’s life but you shouldn’t feel guilty for doing what you need to do for you.” She takes a deep breath. “You didn’t deserve to die for him any more than I deserved to die for my friends. And for the first time, I really mean that. We don’t deserve to suffer or feel pain for the rest of our lives because of it, you know? It’s okay for us to continue to live and laugh and love — our mistakes, they don’t define us. We don’t have to live there.” Kate’s eyes are pleading, begging you to hear her and understand her; to believe her. 
You nod as she swipes a thumb to wipe away a tear. 
“You would never blame me for what my happened to my friends. You’d never say I should suffer in pain or in a life of exile because of it. You’d tell me for what it is — that it was a freak accident and it was out of your control. You can’t spend the rest of your life in those haunted what ifs and I know you’d never want that for me either.”
“Yeah.” Your voice is gravely, raw, but you can’t even focus on it as Boone’s lanky arms wrap around your frame. “Yeah, I hear you.” 
“Sides, even if it were your fault-“ 
“Boone!” Lilly chides, even as she wraps her own arms around you. 
“I ain’t saying it is! You people, you always assume the worst outta me-“ 
“Get to the point!” Javi’s exhausted voice comes from the kitchen. You snort, leaning your head into Boone’s shoulder. 
“Get on with it, Booney.” You whisper. 
“‘M just saying, even if it were your fault, it don’t change that your part of our family now. Always gonna be, no matter where them wind or tornados take us. Or what some stupid Navy guy says about you for that matter.” 
Boone squeezes you before he steps back. Lilly lets you go, albeit hesitantly and you wipe your nose on the sleeve of Kate’s sweatshirt. Javi’s hand finds your back, wrapping you into a tight hug as you turn.  
“You gotta start letting yourself believe you’re worthy of good things.” He mumbles into your sweatshirt. “Trust me, I- I get it okay. It was just as rough for me when I left StormPar, but Boone’s right. We’re a family.” 
You nod into Javi’s shoulder, squeezing the man before letting him go. You wipe your eyes, taking a breath. “Okay, okay, I think I’m good. Just been a hell of a night.” 
Javi nods and the room breaks into quiet chatter as the bags of food get passed around, burgers getting split up among the group. 
Tyler grabs your arm as you pad over to sit on the couch next to Kate. His hug is tight, the smell of cedar and campfire lingering on his flannel a far cry from the smell of jet fuel and whiskey that followed his brother. 
“You saved my life T.” You say quietly, even though no one would be able to hear you through the conversation at the couch. “The Wranglers saved my life. I hope you know that.” 
He squeezes you. “Nah, kid. We just loved you enough for you to see why you should stay. The saving part was all you.” 
-
“I need to go run an errand.” The table looks up at you, pausing around mid-conversation, breakfast plates forgotten. “So you guys can head out on the road ahead of us.” 
“What’re you up to?” Boone asks.
You shake your head. “There’s just something I gotta do before we head out.” 
“Some unfinished business?” Javi asks. 
“Something like that.”
-
The weather is unusually dreary, rain drizzling down on and off as you make the drive over the Coronado bridge. You park in front of the boys house, turning the key in the ignition as you turn to face Tyler and Javi in the backseat. 
“I’m not sure how long this is gonna take, but I’ll be back.” 
“Man, what am I supposed to do to entertain myself?” Javi moans and Kate turns, giving him a sharp glare. 
Late last night, after everyone had fallen asleep, you’d admitted to Kate that you didn’t think you could leave things with him like that, that you couldn’t live with yourself if you never gave him the closure he so desperately needed. 
Kate had told you, voice muffled, that she understood. That she’d stand by you in whatever conversation you wanted to have with him. 
“Go take a walk for all I care. It’s a nice neighborhood.” You say, before wrenching the car door opening, cutting off Javi’s bemoaned But it’s raining! as you slam it harder behind you than you normally ever would’ve allowed it to. 
You wince, already hearing Tyler scold you in your head as you stride up the expansive driveway, saying a silent thank you that Javy’s beat-up truck is sitting in the driveway. 
You force yourself to take a deep breath as you knock on the door. The blue paint is peeling more than ever you note, before it swings open, revealing Mickey. He’s donned in basketball shorts and a muscle tee and must’ve just come back from a run, based on the sweat and rain accumulated on him.
He almost doesn’t seem surprised to see you. 
“Hey.” He says, leaning against the door. 
“Hey.” You respond. “Is Javy here?” 
He nods, opening the door enough to let you inside and the oak shuts firmly behind you as you follow him through the familiar foyer to the couches in the living room. 
“You guys are not much for redecorating.” 
Mickey groans. “Kid, the fact that we’ve gotten anything on the walls as long as we lived in this place is a miracle in and of itself, you know that.” 
Despite the situation, you snort, recalling when the boys had enlisted you to build Mickey’s desk one time two years into them living here. “Oh, I remember.” 
“Coyote!” Mickey shouts up the stairs as you arrive next to the couch, nudging Jake. He gives you a soft smile, pushing himself up to give you a quick hug. 
“I’m really sorry about last night. I didn’t mean to ruin it.” 
Jake shakes his head. “‘S my fault. You and I both know there was probably no other outcome than that.”
The fabric of his Texas sweatshirt is soft as he squeezes you, letting you go as you hear footsteps on the stairs. 
You sigh, turning catching sight of your ex turning the corner. His eyes widen slightly at the sight of you and he tugs on the edges of his Saints sweatshirt. 
He’s nervous, you realize. The taste of that truth is bitter and acrid on your tongue. 
“We need to talk.” You say with more stern bravado then you feel and you force yourself to soften as Mickey lets out a low whistle. “And you, uh, said you had some of my stuff.” 
“We have all of your stuff.” Mickey comments into his protein shake. “It’s all in Bob’s old room.” He points with a finger over his shoulder, but you still know the way. 
You head in the direction to Bob’s room, tugging on the sleeve of Javy’s hoodie as you do. 
He follows you, shutting the bedroom door behind him as you scan the room. “When did Bob move out?” You ask as you pull a box out, sifting through the books. 
“Like two or three months after you left. Think he had plans to move out earlier but uh-“ Javi pauses and your eyes flicker up to study him. “I think they were concerned I’d do something stupid to myself if it was too much change at once.” 
You sigh, eyes fluttering shut as you squat and brace yourself against the box. “Javy.” You breathe out. 
“I’m really sorry about how last night went.” He says as he leans up against one of the taller stacks of boxes. “My Mom’s pretty pissed at me for how I handled myself. I’m mad at myself too. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. Drinking or not, you didn’t deserve it. I was just- confused and frustrated and so hopeful it made me scared. I guess I never prepared myself for what it would be like to see you again, even though clearly-“ He says, gesturing to the room. “I always let myself keep that door open.” 
“Why did you keep this shit anyways?” You ask. “You coulda let my Mom toss all this shit out.” 
He shakes his head. “I couldn’t have. I- I always thought maybe you’d come home. That when you did come home, you’d roll your eyes about your Mom and want your stuff back. Fools hope I guess.” 
You let yourself fall to the floor in a cross-crossed position, scrubbing a hand down your face. “Javy, I am so sorry about how I left. You deserved a lot better than that from me, after everything you did for me. But I was scared and I ran and you got caught in that.”
“Every day since then, I’ve wondered what it was about me that wasn’t enough to make you stay. Did I not love you right? Did I do something to hurt you? Did I not stop when I should’ve?” He takes a sharp breath at the thought that he might’ve pushed you too far while being intimate as being your reason for running. “Every night for two years, I’ve laid in bed at night, going over every single detail. But last night, after hearing that it was Jake’s fault, I’ve gone over every what if. What if he had listened to you? What if he hadn’t taken you? What if I hadn’t gotten drunk that night before or- or had convinced you to stay? What if you had stayed home from the trip; what if Sophia had never asked you to be a bridesmaid? What if-“ 
“Javy, stop.” You stay sternly, pushing yourself up off the floor. “You can’t live in those what ifs. They’ll drive you fucking crazy. You can’t keep living in the past. And it ain’t Jake’s fault, much as we would all, himself probably included, like to lay the blame on him. We can’t go back and change it and we can’t live in that history neither. What happened, happened.” 
He lets out a breath. “You’re handling this better than me.” 
“I’ve had two years to process it. I’ve had two years in a new town with a new job and a new partner and new friends to heal from all of it. You haven’t even had two days to grapple with the truth.” You say as you pop the lid on the box. Your eyes scan the room as you let him process the information, trying to catalogue all that he has, what you need and what you don’t. 
“My Niall Horan shirt!” You exclaim, wrestling a box out of the corner of the room. “I’d been wondering what happened to this!” You pop the lid off, subsequently discovering your American Girl doll. “And Julie! I remember that year I went as her for Halloween and brought her over here. She was the highlight of the party for all the drunken idiots.” 
“That was the year of the dolls.” He comments from behind you. 
“Yeah, yeah, cause you guys all went as Ken dolls, except for Mickey, who went as Carlos from Big Time Rush, and I finally had to explain to you who they were after I made that joke, that they were the greatest boy band of our generation, on our second date.” 
“It’s crazy to think about now, how the yahoos could all see how I felt about you and I was still insisting we were just friends.” 
“Oh, enough time has passed. We can admit now that we weren’t just friends. We made out too much, in public no less, for that to be anywhere near platonic.” 
He doesn’t say anything for a minute and you turn, worried you’ve gone too far. His eyes are glassy, a fond smile on his face. 
“I really loved you, you know that?” 
“Javy…” 
He gives a half-shrug, looking down. “You can say what you want about being unhappy, about needing to leave, but I hope you know that I really loved you. I really cared about you and I really thought some day you’d come home to me. You were my best friend and I wanted to grow old with you. It just- it just feels like it didn’t mean anything to you.” 
A lump grows in your throat as he wipes a few tears away from his cheeks. You look down, unsure if you should admit the truth. 
“Javy, I found the ring.” 
“W-what?”
“The night we got back from Texas, I accidentally found it. But it- it freaked me out. I was already walking such a fine line those days, so afraid and so mixed up from what happened, already so unhappy and I knew it was over then and there. Because I found it and pictured you getting down on one knee and tried to think of what I’d say and when I knew I’d say no, I knew I needed to end it.” 
He lets out a choked sob as you work your throat around the ever-growing lump, knowing you have to finish this conversation, as much as it pains you. 
“Javy, of course it meant something to me.” You say, unclenching your hand from where it’s fisted in the dark blue material of the t-shirt. You set the objects down back in the box, taking a few steps towards him. “Javy, I did love you. Really. You were my first real boyfriend, my first serious boyfriend, my first. I thought the world of you and you were my best friend too. Okay, my favorite times were when we would stay up all night laughing or- or all those times we just existed together. But both things can be true — you can have hurt me, I can have been unhappy, and we both can still have loved each other the best we could’ve at the time.” You say, taking another step towards him. “But that’s what I keep trying to tell you. That girl that I was with you, that person you fell in love with, she doesn’t exist anymore. I’m not that version of me anymore.” Javy only looks at you as he cries as you cling to the hope that this time he’ll finally listen.
“Can I have a hug?” He croaks. You nod, reaching out for him and he’s quick to tug you into his embrace, as if you might change your mind waiting a hair of a second longer. 
His hug is tight, and you can feel the way his tears wet your pale yellow Oklahoma crewneck, the same way you know you’re soaking his Saints hoodie. 
It’s weird, because hugging him doesn’t feel like coming home like it used to. 
It’s weird, because it feels like the door on this part of your life is finally shutting behind you. 
You think you’re at peace with it.
“You sure you won’t come back?” His muffled voice sounds. 
“You know I can’t.” He whimpers as you  shake your head. “I’d be coming back to a place that isn’t my home anymore, a life that isn’t mine. Javy, you have to let me go. If not for me, then for yourself.” 
“I don’t know how.” He pleads into your shoulder. 
“It takes time.” You whisper. “But one day it won’t hurt so much. I promise.”
You aren’t sure how long the two of you stand there, but finally he lets you go, stepping back as his back hits the wall, sliding down. You take that as a sign that you can get back to sorting. 
“Hey, you’ve asked me a lot of questions about what’s changed since you been gone. Can I ask you questions about what you’ve been up to?” He asks, voice watery and raw. 
“Seems only fair.” You say, squatting down to rifle through a box full of high school memorabilia. 
“Are you dating Kate?” 
You swallow, glancing at him as you pull out your yearbooks. “Yeah, I am.” 
“I figured.” 
“How’d you figure it out?” 
“She looks at you like how I used to.” He says with a shrug as he stretches his legs out in front of him. Upon seeing your dubious look, he lets out a wet laugh. “She just- she always found a reason to be next to you last night. She always brought you into conversation, looked for you when you weren’t with her, looked for you even when you were with her. It was obvious she cared a great deal about you and I sort of guessed she was who you didn’t want to bring into this.” 
You shake your head. “This isn’t her fight. She’s got my back, I know that, but this didn’t need to involve her if I could help it. It was between me and you.” 
“She seems cool.” He finally comments after a minute. 
“Freaky genius and all the wit to match.” 
“Like you.” Your cheeks warm at the compliment as you untangle the honor cords. “She make you happy?” 
“Honestly?” You say and he nods. “I see my whole life with her in a way I’ve never seen it before. She’s my best friend and my partner. I love her to death and there’s nowhere in this world I wouldn’t follow her.” 
“You guys have any pets?” 
“Two dogs and a cat.” 
“Jesus, is this farm you live on really a zoo?” 
“I think her Mom feels that way sometimes.” You say with a chuckle. “No, the team has Buttons, but he’s really Boone’s if you want to get into it. Ty’s taken on a dog I named Enid by sheer force of will from this dog. And Kate and I adopted a kitten named Peaches about this time two years ago. Ty and I are getting horses in October too.” 
“So… you and Kate living together?” 
You shake your head. “No. Not yet, anyways. Technically, I got a small two bedroom apartment in Tulsa I rent with the other Javi but he’s almost always somewhere in Arkansas with Boone in the off-season and I spend all my time with Kate on her farm when we aren’t out on the road.”
“They seem like really good people.” 
“They’re some of the best. Hey, are you still in touch with Elle?” 
Javy’s eyes widen. “Your friend from grad school? Some, why?” 
“You should ask her on a date.”
“No- No, I couldn’t.” 
You fix him with a look. “Why not? I bet that girl is still enamored with you.” 
“She was your best friend, that would be wrong.” 
You shrug, setting aside a snow globe. “We ain’t together anymore and Elle and I ain’t friends anymore. And trust me, if you and I hadn’t been what we were when Elle came into my life, Elle would’ve a hundred percent gone after you. And I wouldn’t be mad you know. You deserve to move on.” 
“Not with one of your friends.” 
You click your tongue. “I’m just saying…”
-
Kate’s drumming her fingertips on the edges of the door as the minutes tick by, the gnawing in her stomach resurfacing as the time drags on. Javi huffs for the millionth time, blowing a stray curl away from his face as a blue Bronco passes them, pulling up to park in the driveway. 
Javi leans forward, peering over the center console to study the two men climbing out of the Bronco through the windshield. “Hey Ty, isn’t that your brother’s fiancé?” 
Tyler looks up from his phone, glancing out his window. When he finally responds, his voice is impossibly tight, making her wince. “Kate, where exactly are we right now?” 
Upon her non-answer, Tyler pulls himself from the car, a colorful swear leaving his mouth as Javi follows right behind him. She scrambles out of her door, tugging on the two men’s arms. “Stop it.” She pleads, causing them both to turn. “Look, I don’t like it either but I gotta respect the fact that she wants closure. I’d do anything to have that, you know that.” 
Tyler yanks his arm back, striding across the lawn towards the two men as they let themselves in the house. Bradley’s eyes are wide as he catches sight of Tyler, shouting into the house. 
She groans when Tyler shoulders past Bradley and Pete, Javi still hot on his heels. “I am so sorry about them.” She apologizes to the two men as they shut the front door. 
“Tyler.” Jake growls, yanking on his brother’s arm. “I will sit on your head like I did when we were kids.” 
“I am not gonna let you do this to her again. For two years, my team has been putting that girl back together, putting together pieces of her you broke.” Tyler snaps, poking his finger into Jake’s chest. 
“Yeah? And he’s waited two years for this conversation, to finally get closure. They need this. And if you interrupt it, so help me God.” Jake says as he pushes his brother towards the couch. Jake takes the hint, sitting as Javi hesitantly follows suit. After a few moments of awkward silence, Kate clears her throat, catching Tyler’s eye. She jerks her head to his brother and he shakes his head. She does it again, causing Pete to glance up at her. 
“Are you okay, kid?” 
“Tyler.” She crosses her arms. “You know she doesn’t want you to leave it like this.” 
Jake’s eyes flicker up at her, giving her an eery sense of deja vu. It had been a strange adjustment, seeing a carbon copy of a person they all knew and loved, but yet acted so different. Whereas Tyler was rough around the edges, thick cowboy country accent and swear words that would make milk curdle and friends with everyone, ever the life of the party, Jake had kept a lot to himself the night before. He held himself together, never in anyway that would indicate cracks in his well-maintained image. She saw him let loose a few times with his friends, eager to hear about your and Tyler’s lives, and always polite to the Wranglers but there was a certain detachment from it all that Tyler lacked. 
“Tyler, I am sorry.” Tyler grunts, crossing his arms. Jake sighs before trying again. “For all of it. Genuinely. I know you’re thinking I’m real selfish right about now and I’m thinking it too. I’m sure she didn’t let up to the worst of it and I’m really sorry about all of it. But I didn’t call you for some sick or twisted reason of hurting her. I called you here because you’re my brother and I want you here. I want you to see this life that I’ve built for myself, cause I’m finally happy, and I- I want to share it with you.”
“Oh, you mean the life you were too busy building to come to our grandparents funeral? Some life.” Tyler scoffs. 
Jake’s shoulders fall. “Ty, I’m sorry.” He whispers. “You’re my brother, you were my best friend, and there hasn’t been a day that goes by that I don’t regret stepping up when it mattered. No stupid trophy or promotion was ever worth losing you.”
Tyler swallows, letting out a deep breath but doesn’t say anything further and Jake clearly accepts that that’s all he’s going to get out of him. He turns to Kate. “Is she happy? With you?” 
“Yes.” Javi blurts out. “So happy.” 
She peers down at her friend, who has a rapidly growing sheepish grin on his scarlet face. “The way you say that makes it sound like we aren’t happy.” 
“Just have to make the point.” 
She gives an exaggerated roll of her eyes. “You’re ridiculous.” She turns back to Jake and Bradley. “Yeah, yeah she really is happy.” 
“Does this mean I can go back to watching the Wranglers streams now or am I gonna get yelled at again? Cause now that you think about it, we all kinda gaslit Coyote.” Fanboy calls from across the kitchen. Tyler turns, giving the boy a curious look. 
“What?” 
“Mickey used to watch your guys streams until I started appearing in them.” You comment, appearing next to Kate. She jumps a little, taking you in. Your face has the remnants of tears, voice raw, but there’s a lack of weight in your body she’s been seeing you carry ever since she’s known you. You wrap your arms around one of Kate’s leaning your head on your shoulder after setting a plastic tub on the ground. “They all convinced him,” You say, jerking your head towards your ex. “That he was losing his mind. Also, how come my errands never get to just be my errands? What part of stay in the car until I got back did we not understand?” 
-
“I tried to stop them, really I did.” Kate protests. You let out a quiet laugh, hiding your face in the back of her shirt. 
“Have T and Jake made up?” You say quietly. She shakes her head and you sigh.  
“Tyler-“
“No, and we’re leaving.” Tyler says, cutting you off as he pushes himself off the couch. “With the way Boone drives they’re probably halfway to Vegas by now.” 
“That’s physically not possible.” Kate mutters and you snort. 
“Tyler, I don’t want you to leave things like this.” 
“That’s not your choice.” Tyler says gruffly, stalking to the front door. Both you and Kate wince as he slams it. 
“I don’t know where he thinks he’s going, I still have the keys.” You say, finally letting go of Kate. “It’s my car anyways.” You mutter under your breath before sighing. “Anyways, we should really be on the road because Boone’s probably stopped at the alien tourist stop in Bakersfield by now.” 
“If Tyler complains about traffic again, can we take a group vote to leave him on the side of the road?” Javi asks as he cranes his head up at you. 
“We’re not leaving Tyler on the side of the road.” Kate says with a tired sigh. 
“Even if he walks to Vegas?” Javi protests earning a tired laugh from you. 
“Okay Kate, will you drive?” She nods as you hand her the keys, Javi standing up from the couch. “Javi, take that.” You say, pointing to the box. “I’m going to be out in just a minute.”
You wait for the door to shut behind them before turning to Jake. “Okay Jake, you can have your real hug now.” He grins as you pull him into a hug. “Don’t worry about him. It’ll take time.” 
“I’m sure with a couple hours trapped in a car with you, he’ll cave and call.” Jake says softly, forced humor in the words. 
(It would take three weeks, an incessantly annoying three weeks on your part, before Ty got so frustrated with you he’d called Jake while sitting on top of his truck on the ranch in Arkansas. You’re still not sure what they talked about, what was said, but by the end of the week, Tyler walked into the house with a wedding invitation on fancy card stock Tyler teased Jake endlessly for.) 
“Don’t be so hard on yourself, though.” You say, squeezing him. “Let bygones by bygones. I have.” 
He hums. “Take care of yourself.” 
Bradley gives you a brief hug. “I’m glad you’re happy and safe kid. That’s all I would’ve ever wanted for you.” 
“Hope you weren’t too hard on Jake.” 
“No more than the normal amount.” 
“The normal amount is zero.” 
Bradley laughs. “You’re being more fair to him than he deserves, hope you know that.”
“Something something time space therapy.”
You reach your arms out for Pete and he stands up, giving you a grin, as Bradley laughs harder. “Don’t do anything out there that I would do.” 
You laugh. “No promises.” You pad over to Mickey, giving him a tight hug. “If you ever decide you get tired of the pilot life and want to become a storm chaser, you let me know.” Mickey laughs. 
“You’ll have to unblock me first.” You cringe at the reminder and pat his back. 
“Done. You take care of yourself.” He gives you a two finger salute, letting you step back. 
You turn back to Javy, who’s mostly kept to himself through the whole conversation. “Come here you.” He looks surprised you’re offering him another hug, but he returns it nonetheless. “You be safe out there, you hear me.” 
“Yes ma’am.” He whispers. “Don’t get sucked up into a tornado.” 
“I’ll try my hardest. And uh, really do think about my Elle suggestion.”
You both linger for a minute longer before eventually he pulls away. “You sure that’s all you want to take?”
You shrug. “Yeah, I got what I need out there. Sell the rest of the stuff, make a quick buck off of me. It’s the least I can do.”
He chuckles, shaking his head. “Sounds like a deal. Uh, can I walk you to the door?” You nod and he trails behind you quietly. “So this is uh, really goodbye.” 
“Seems like it.” 
“I’m uh, really happy you found what you’re looking for. I can only hope I’ll find it someday.”
“You will.” You say quietly. “I’m really sorry it didn’t work out between us.” 
“It’s for the better it seems.” 
You nod. “Well-“ You clear your throat. “Goodbye Javy.” 
The door shut behinds you with a soft thud. You sigh, padding across the wet grass as you slip in the seat next to Kate. As she pulls away from the curb, Javi asks how you’re feeling. 
“It’s stupid.” You mumble. “But I keep thinking of this Taylor Swift lyric.” 
“Not this again.” Tyler mutters and through the rear view mirror you can see Javi flick his ear. 
“What is it?” Kate asks softly. 
“It’s just this one line — what a valiant roar, what a bland goodbye. It’s just odd, I think. I did really love him at one point and I did really think maybe I’d spend the rest of my life with him, that those would be my best days. And it all just kind of ends here.” You sigh, settling back into your seat. “But- I don’t know. I’m not mad about how it all happened, I guess. It lead me here.” 
Tyler lifts his chin, giving you a soft yet sincere smile through the rearview mirror. “And we’re happy to have you here.” 
-
“So,” Kate starts from the balcony of your Vegas hotel room. Your friends are fast asleep inside, all piled somewhere on the beds pushed together. You’re pretty sure when you left, Boone had pushed himself in between Tyler and Javi and was snoring. “I’ve been sort of- I kind of have something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about.” 
You glance at your girlfriend. “Yeah?”
She nods. “Last night, when Javi and Boone left cause of the bad feeling they got- they weren’t the only ones who felt that. It kinda made me sick, hearing them talk about you like that, and thinking about the fact that you might actually do it. That you might remember that you liked your life there better and leave Oklahoma.” She takes a sharp breath. “Leave me.”
“Kate-“ 
“I know I’m not really the best at- at always showing you how much you mean to me, that sometimes I get caught up in chasing the storm, in actually making it all mean something, that I forgot about how great of a thing I have. I’m trying really hard not to take it for granted, because I did once and I can’t- I can’t go through that again. To lose you would be one of the greatest losses of my life.” 
“Kate, I love you. You aren’t gonna lose me, I’m not going anywhere. I only want to be with you, there isn’t any other life for me except for the one right next to you.” 
She reached up, brushing away an eyelash that had fallen onto your cheek. “I think I’m sort of starting to understand that now.” She reaches out for your hand. “Listen, I‘ve sort of- sort of been keeping my eye on some places going up for sale in Sapulpa. I know my Mom doesn’t mind having us around but I think maybe it’s time we give her back her peace and quiet.”
“Kate…”
She reaches a hand up, tucking a hair behind your ear. “We can keep the barn as home base but I found this really cute place for not too bad of a price while we were driving out here. I sort of scheduled a tour with the realtor for the day after next.” She’s wearing a soft, cautious smile.
“Kate,” Your breath hitches. “Kate Carter, are you asking me to move in with you? Are you asking me to buy a house with you?”
She gives a sort of nonchalant shrug. “If that’s what you want.” 
“I- Yes, of course that’s what I want!” You exclaim, belatedly realizing you may wake your friends. Well, not Boone at least, who sleeps like the dead. Your voice drops considerably. “Yes, yes I would love that.” 
Kate gives you a grin, reaching out to tug on the elastic band of your pajama pants to bring you closer to her. You laugh, colliding into her. Your hands brace yourself on her shoulders as Kate smiles wider than you think you’ve ever seen her. 
“I love you so much.” She whispers. “How lucky am I.”
“I hope it’s like this forever.” You say softly. “I know, there’s no guarantee and eventually, they’ll find other things. But I hope it’s always this easy, you know? Not just with us but with them too you know? They might not be the Wranglers forever but I hope they’re our family forever.” You say, turning your head to look at your friends through the glass. 
You feel the outline of Kate’s smile on your cheek. “They will be. I promise. No matter where we all go, they’ll still be here. Can’t take the home out of Oklahoma, right?”
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December 16 Holiday Prompt fic: Romanogers
Note: This is set in my Mission: Marriage universe where Steve and Natasha had a marriage of necessity to keep Ross happy.
Prompts: mutual pining, Romanogers, I’ll be home for Christmas
I’ll Be home for Christmas
You Can count on me
Please Have snow and mistletoe
And presents on the tree…..
Natasha was huddled on a bunk in the ship smuggling her out of harm’s way after she’d completed her mission for Fury. It had been a very long five months and she desperately missed her husband. Forming attachments did not come easy to her, but living with Steve had started to make her appreciate quiet domestic life. They may have started out as a marriage of necessity to help keep him out of Ross’s clutches, but she’d quickly realized that her heart was in danger. The feelings she’d ruthlessly tamper down in 2014 had begun to grow again, and it was a little terrifying, but also comforting. The Red Room had not succeeded in crushing out her humanity. To pass the time, she started writing a letter.
Dear Steve,
I’m not always great with words or feelings, but I find myself missing you more deeply than ever. I missed you by my side. I missed you having my back. I missed how well we work together. I missed your smartass comments. I miss you. I’m finally on my way home and I can’t wait to celebrate our first Christmas together. I hope it’s only the beginning of many more.
Yours,
Natasha
P. S. Don’t let Clint raid the liquor stash. He’s known to be a kleptomaniac when it comes to the good stuff.
Steve finished wrapping the last present and stood up to stretch. He was ahead of the game for once and was extremely satisfied. He’d put up a few small decorations, but no tree. That was a special event he needed to share with Natasha. He wanted to share with Natasha. They’d been married in April and she’d been gone since July and Steve was pining for her. His friends had taken to shaking their heads at him.
“You’ve got it bad, Steve,” Clint sighed. “I know that look. Just don’t go off your feed, now. She’d kill me if I let you waste away.”
Steve had laughed and reminded the archer that he’d promised Nat he’d keep Clint out of trouble.
December 20th arrived and Steve was engrossed in a good book, Christmas music playing softly in the background, when a key turned in the lock and six quick taps were rapped on the door. Hearing his wife’s signal, Steve bolted from his chair and had her in his arms before she’d even set her bags down.
“Awe, Steve, did somebody miss me?” She asked teasingly inside his embrace.
“More than words can say. That was the longest five months of my life,” he told her, clutching her tightly.
“Did everything go okay? No injuries you’re gonna try and hide from me?”
He pulled away to look her over carefully.
“No,” Nat told him fondly. “It wasn’t that kind of a mission.”
“Thank God,” Steve said fervently. “What can I do for you?”
“Some dinner might be nice. Doesn’t have to be fancy. I’ll hit the shower in the meantime. Man, it’s good to be home.”
She looked around the apartment, taking it all in contentedly.
“No tree yet, Steve?”
“I wanted to pick it out with you,” Steve answered honestly, making her heart melt again. “I had faith you’d make it home for Christmas.”
Natasha gave him a gentle kiss on the cheek.
“Ugh, Steve. You’re too precious. I’ll be right back.”
Frozen pizza and leftover wings would probably not be most people’s welcome home dinner of choice, but to Steve and Nat, it was perfection. Somewhere along the line her hand found its way into his and it stayed there as they quietly caught up and revelled in each other’s presence.
Steve saw an envelope lying on his pillow when he went in to grab some extra blankets. Seeing his name on the front in her handwriting, he picked it up and read the letter inside. A lump grew in his throat as he read it and realized the truth of what she was saying.
He looked up to see her standing in the doorway, appearing to be casual, but he wasn’t fooled. She was holding her breath.
“Nat, this means so much. I think we’re both on the same page when it comes to wanting to make this real. Am I right?”
“You are,” she admitted, a tiny catch in her voice as she moved toward him.
“Steve, can I stay with you tonight?” She asked after she’d kissed him nearly senseless. “Your mattress is better.”
Steve barked a laugh at her “reason”, but nodded.
“I’ll see if I can’t persuade you to make it a regular thing,” he whispered as she tugged him toward the bed.
“Shut up and get busy, Rogers,” she ordered, pushing him to sit down so she could climb on his lap.
“Yes, ma’am,” he replied, going in for another kiss.
Merry Christmas to us.
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sunnyrealist · 9 months ago
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Chapter 37: The First Fight
The Sun, the Moon, and All Our Stars
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Summary and Details…
Chapter Background and Summary: Sebastian and Kate are on an adventurous camping trip in the Scottish Highlands. On the third day, the lovers explore a hidden cave. Attempting to feed off of their emotions, a horde of Dementors create an illusion depicting the couple's greatest fantasies and worst fears. When Sebastian passes out, Kate protects them both, getting them both to safety. When he wakes, they have a lot to unpack. Sebastian finally tells Kate more about his unimaginably horrific experiences in Azkaban and reveals his ever-present self-doubt. Kate's subsequent words of unwavering support, positivity, and adoration lift him from the depths of his sorrow, and it all results in intense lovemaking. Filled with happiness, Sebastian stupidly proposes without thinking; Kate tells him she wants to marry him but won't accept until he plans and does it right.
Pairing: 25-year-old, post-Azkaban Sebastian Sallow x Kate Mayflower (my OC)
Content warnings: In general, this story is rated 18+, so MNDI. This chapter features the couple's first argument, the hypothetical idea of parental disapproval, feelings of extremely low self-esteem, discussion of privilege and status, misunderstandings, and sharp, biting words.
The full chapter is available below the cut; it can also be found on AO3 (link is posted below). Please leave some feedback if possible. 🥰
Chapter 37: The First Fight
Kate and Sebastian finally stop chuckling about their newfound hatred for caves.
“I am rather excited to see the castle, though,” Kate tells him with a grin. "There's bound to be something interesting there if it's so inaccessible. Hopefully it will be safer, though. I think I've had enough danger for a lifetime." She laughs, but she's completely serious. "I've never been in a situation like that in all my life. I... Honestly, I never thought I would need to use anything I learned in Defense Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts. Thank goodness for Professor Hecat being a great teacher. You know, she is such a fascinating person."
 Sebastian has a brief flash of guilt upon hearing the word safer. He and Kate could have died in the cave if not for her quick thinking. He should have been the one to protect her - and he has mixed feelings about the fact that his girlfriend had to be his protector. It’s obvious that she is still worried and shaken. 
He tries to shake those thoughts and kisses her shoulder gently, smiling as she mentions their old teacher. "You must have been a good student in her class, then?"
"I think I earned an Acceptable grade, so, no, not really. I was definitely not one of her star students. I was never a great duelist; no one would have recruited me for Crossed Wands, that illicit dueling club. It was such a poorly kept secret. A couple of my friends joined it - Lottie and Otty. They’re married now, living in America," Kate adds. "Anyway, I know the class wasn't only about dueling. Just like everyone else, I had to practice against a Boggart and learn the Patronus spell and other things." She furrows her brow as she realizes something. "Sebastian... you never learned the Patronus spell, did you? We didn't study that until sixth year... you would have… been in prison."
Sebastian shakes his head slowly. His face is unreadable for a moment before he speaks.
"I did not have the opportunity to learn the Patronus spell," he says quietly. "You're right. I was in prison for sixth year." He sighs. "Not only did they take my freedom and years of my life... but they robbed me of my education as well. That was one of the worst parts."
Kate rubs his back. "Considering how much you love to study and learn, to never have finished your schooling… That is truly a cruel punishment. I mean... of course you're a competent wizard," she notes quickly, hoping not to offend him. "You're more competent than most, really..." She looks up into his eyes. "You would have been a top NEWT student, based on what you've told me about school. It's a shame."
Sebastian's face remains serious but even more sad. He takes a deep breath, exhaling to shake off his melancholy. "I wish I had had the opportunity to finish my schooling," he remarks somberly this time. "But it is what it is. My life is so different than I expected."
Kate's eyebrows raise as she considers his wish. She wonders if, as a Hogwarts staff member, she could advocate for him to finish coursework somehow. She doesn't mention it, as she doesn't want to get his hopes up. She's never even heard of that happening, so it’s incredibly unlikely.
"There is one thing I will say. You may have never graduated, but you are a learned man. Honestly, you're one of the smartest people I know." She offers him a smile. "And you've experienced things that others never will. It's given you a perspective most will never be able to understand."
"You are correct. It has given me a view of the world and humanity that is truly unique. It has changed me in many ways," he admits, meeting her gaze once again. "But I cannot deny that it has hurt my pride, as a wizard. If I am being completely honest, it is something that makes me ashamed and embarrassed... and sometimes angry."
"I understand." Kate nods, looking down.
It’s been a day of misfortune, revelations, and tough conversations. There is still something weighing heavily on her mind, one that has been for quite some time now. It’s not going to make for pleasant conversation, but it eventually must be said, so Kate decides that it might as well happen today.
 "I have to be completely honest with you, Bash." There's a pause. "You know how much I love you. But... my family..." She takes a breath. "My family has really high standards. I... I don't know what they are going to think about your past." She takes a breath. "No one will change my mind about you, but... it worries me. I think they are going to be a challenge." She is afraid to meet his eyes. It's going to hurt him, but she has to tell him at some point. Her family is going to ask questions soon - potentially as soon as they return home after their trip.
Sebastian takes a sharp inhale and holds his breath as he processes her words. She's concerned that her family won't accept him, he gathers.
Now, it is her turn to see a flash of anger from him. He clenches his jaw tightly, his entire face hard. "My past," he says, his voice low and cold. "My past should not matter to them. And you know better than anyone that my past doesn't define me. You know who I am now..."
Kate tenses up even more upon seeing his expression and hearing his tone. Her own voice comes out a little squeaky. "O-Of course I know that, Sebastian..." She looks as though she is physically in pain. "But… my parents are going to find out about your past, and... though it doesn't define you, it is part of who you are today. If I don't tell them myself, they'll figure it out on their own. My mum is resourceful. She can find anything out if she puts her mind to it. She knows a lot of people. She's... she's really the obstacle, if I'm honest, Bash. I'm..." she hesitates. "I'm scared. I'm scared of what she'll think."
"Your mother shouldn't even know about my past before I tell her," he barks. "I should be the one to tell your parents... Not you." He looks as though he is struggling to remain in control, his anger seeping out of him in waves. "Is there even a part of you that believes me worthy of your trust and affection?" he growls. “That your parents will find me worthy?”
"Stop it," Kate snaps back, irritated. "You need to cool down. I'm on your side, not working against you." Her brows knit together. "I mean, Sebastian, consider their point of view. Someday, if we become parents, would you be thrilled by the prospect of our daughter marrying an Azkaban escapee who never even graduated from school?" She realizes she's getting heated, too, and takes a moment before she starts again. "I'm more upset about this than you know! You deserve family. If my family is awful about you, I would feel terrible, Sebastian. Terrible for you."
"Yeah, well, whatever," Sebastian replies, bitterness in his voice. "I am an Azkaban escapee, an uneducated dark wizard who only works for the DMLE because I was forced to become a double-agent. And I’m practically a gang member. You're right! I'm not a catch! Why would any parents want their daughter to be with a man who has done the things I have done?" His breath is getting faster now, his hand clenched and shaking with rage and adrenaline. "They'll despise me, and there will be nothing I can do about that. I'm just a lowlife loser, aren't I?!"
"No!" Kate protests. "No, of course not! Bash, please..."
"Face it, Kate," he says coldly. "Your parents are going to look down on me because of my past. Hell, even you are looking down on me right now!" There is a pause as he gathers his thoughts amidst the anger boiling inside. "You know they see everything from their angle of pureblood privilege. And I am pureblood, as if that even fucking matters, but I certainly don't fit into your family's world of status and wealth. I won't fit in. I won't be considered good enough for you!"
Kate begins tearing up silently, unable to speak. Her throat hurts, a sure sign she is going to cry. When she eventually feels the inevitable hot tears sliding down her face, she wipes them and shakily says, "I-I t-think we should take a minute to- to ourselves. I'll... get dinner ready. Please don't follow me."
Sebastian's heart shatters as he watches tears roll down her cheeks, her lips trembling. He's seen Kate cry before, but never like this. She's usually so confident, so collected, but here, in this moment, she is anything but.
Anger still smolders inside of him, but he knows it isn't really directed at her. He knows he needs to calm down. He needs to be better, but he just can't resist another mean comment. "Fine. Go. Be alone! Go cry or whatever it is that you need to do," he spits out, his voice tinged with bitterness.
Kate is mute as she puts her pink dress back on, struggling to tie the bow as her hands shake. Sebastian just observes, simmering and not offering to help. She takes one last look at him, then disappears down into her extendable bag to take some time to calm herself down and think.
He watches her leave with his fists clenched in a white-knuckled grip, tears burning in his eyes. Almost immediately, Sebastian wants to follow her and apologize. He wants to hug her, hold her, wipe her tears... but he just can't. Deep down, his pride is wounded. Is it his fault that she is crying? She always has it together, she is always strong, and here he has reduced her to tears with just a few words. His thoughts are a mix of anger, guilt, and regret as he gets up from the bed and dresses. He opens the tent flap and steps outside to get some air.
The moment Kate reaches the bottom of the ladder, she mutters a silencing charm and allows herself to let loose, sobbing. The situation just isn't fair to anyone, and she knows it's going to be difficult to convince her family about Sebastian's worth. Her mum is so judgmental, and her papa and sister will be concerned more than anything.When some time has passed, she finally begins to prepare for dinner. She'll have to face Sebastian sooner or later, and perhaps after some time and some food, they can have a more civil conversation.
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buckysmith · 2 years ago
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You always meet twice in life
Recom Miles Quaritch × fem. Human. reader (Story not one shot)
„You always meet twice in life" but how could you meet someone who was already dead?
Well, let's see...
Part 1 here
Part 2: Who would I be without you
So the humans are back, stronger than before, and all we can do is raid their supply routes, destroy their machines and kill them. Your gaze is fixed on the images of the already destroyed machines, while you only half-heartedly listen to Jake and the others. The humans had learned from their mistakes and even if they suffered setbacks again and again through the targeted and well thought attacks, you were aware that at some point the tide would turn. The tide would turn for you, not in the positive way of course.
"We can destroy their roads, tracks, steal their weapons and goods. Kill the men and women who bring the goods from one place to another, but new ships come almost every month bringing more soldiers, more weapons, more destruction. It's an endless loop of violence and death, on both sides. " Your gaze lifts to look Jake, who, like everyone else present, has now turned his gaze to you. "And what do you think we should do about it? Sit around and do nothing? Wait for them to overrun us all?" His voice is annoyed, while he looks at you just as disappointed as one of his children when they don't follow his orders. "I don't know what to do, I just know that at a certain point the tide will turn for us and we will become the hunted and they the hunters." You cross your arms as Jake groans more annoyed than before before you speak up again. "Eywa protects us, her immune defenses against humans is as good as it were fifteen years ago, however the humans will find a way around this, a way to not allert her immune system if they not haven't already. They also know where we are, not exactly where, but they know we are somewhere in the Hallelujah Mountains." You let out a sigh as you run your fingers through your hair and let your gaze slide over the map. "They've built more in a year than they have in the past thirty and this time we have no one to give Intel." "Damn it, tell us what we don't know yet y/n! " Jake interrupts you, turning away from you to face Norman. "You'd better go if you can't bring anything useful to the table kid." You see him glance at you in the corner of his eye and heaves a sigh, only to nod and head for the door. "We all have a target on our backs, you in particular Jake, so you should all be thinking about what we need to do should people find us. I can only say it again, the children should not leave the village again, at least not without an adult." With that you leave the meeting room and head home to your barracks.
Your gaze is directed at your book while the food is quietly cooking in the background and your attention keeps wavering back and forth between the two things. After a while, however, your gaze turns to the clock, the eclipse has already taken place and it has become quite quiet in the village, and yet there is still no trace of your son. With a sigh you stand up, put the book aside and turn off the stove, take the food off it and put a lid on the pot. It's not the first time that spider doesn't show up on time, but in a time that is so dangerous, his late appearance leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. But no matter how many times you asked him to come home on time, he was always late and the excuses were always the same. You shake your head slightly at his behavior while running your fingers through your hair and closing your eyes for a moment. He was already sixteen, but he still acted like a little boy, especially when he was with Lo'ak. You shake your head again at the thought of what your son and Jake's might have done again while no adult was paying attention to the two idiots. Your attention turns to the door as you hear it open and look into the face of Spider, who looks at you as if you were a ghost.
"Where have we been for so long young man?" You raise an eyebrow as you put your hands on your hips and watch him try to come up with an excuse. "I probably don't even want to know." You grumble, waving it off and crossing your arms in front of your chest while not breaking eye contact with Spider. "I understand that you like to spend time with your friends but I don't know how many times I have to tell you to be home before the eclipse. I'm not doing this to annoy you but because I'm worried about you, please try to be home earlier next time." You see him avoid your gaze and sigh slightly. If only he would finally understand that it's for his and the other kids' safety, maybe he would manage to get home on time. You hear a soft sorry before he wants to disappear into his room, but you stop him with your voice. " You look hungry Spider, you should eat something and if you want you can tell me about your day, what do you think?" His eyes turn to you as his eyes start to sparkle. "Go ahead and sit down, I'll give you something in a minute" You turn away from him, stand up and take a bowl, fill it with the stew, put it on the table along with a spoon and sit yourself down next to him. "Thanks mom, thanks for the food and for putting it out for me. " He smiles gently at you before he starts to eat, or rather starts to almost gulp down the food and tell you about his day.
-
-
-
"Mom, can I ask you something, but you promise not to be mad at me?". In your head you run through all the scenarios of what he might have done once again, but it's only early morning so it couldn't be much. "Of course, just ask."
"Am I like my father?" His voice is almost a whisper and yet you understand him. You know what he's trying to say, which is why you gently place your hand on his and he looks at you because of it. "You are not your father Spider, you are you and he is him." You smile softly at him before standing up and sitting down next to him to give him a hug. "You're not to blame for what he did and you're not like him, you love the Na'vi and you do it even though you get so much rejection." You sigh as he averts his gaze, squirming out of your arms and looking to one of the pictures where he was just a little kid. "You don't feel like you belong with the humans, nor are you considered by the humans or Na'vi to be one of their own. Yet you are so incredibly kind, helping where you can and showing everyone, human and Na'vi alike, that you are not to be underestimated. Your will is strong and you are loyal to the principles you swore allegiance to, that may be the only thing that unites you and your father." His gaze settles on you again and you can't help but gently place your hand against his cheek to stroke over one of his blue stripes. "You do share that trait with your father but you are not him Spider. This trait is something so incredibly valuable when used properly and YOU use it properly. So don't be ashamed of it, wear it with pride because I don't know anyone who is like you, no one is as loyal and fights for the right cause as you do and that's despite everyone putting obstacles in your way. Remember that you are not to blame for what your father did, because you did not choose to be his son. But I am incredibly grateful to him for that, because without him I wouldn't have such a great son today, and who would I be without you. " He closes his eyes for a moment, puts his hand on yours and then opens his eyes again before hugging you. "Thanks mom...""That's what I'm here for honey." You hear a knock on the window of your bungalow, look out and see the grimace of lo'ak, who must be mimicking spider, and roll your eyes as spider breaks away from you, gives you a kiss on the cheek and runs to the door. "Have fun, don't do anything stupid and please, be home before the eclipse.... Oh and Spider, please don't leave the village." You look at your son who just rolls his eyes and gives an annoyed "yeah mom" before walking out to his friends and leaving you behind.
Quaritch is in the next part, I promise :))
Tag list: @perseny @kacchasu
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poguesholland · 3 years ago
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Tom proposes to the reader?
This request was sent in literally a year ago, and I just got around to it now. So sorry!
-
It was your first time seeing Tom in about four months. He was busy with filming for his new movie and you were sent on too many work related trips to even count. Luckily, the both of you were able to take a week off from work to spend some time together in London.
December had never looked so beautiful, in your opinion. You loved London and you loved it even more during the winter time, not fully understanding how a city could be so marvelous. The Christmas decorations, snow everywhere, hot chocolate and cookies from Ben’s cookies just made your heart grow warm.
However, today, Tom and you were stuck in his flat as there was a snow storm and it was too dangerous to go out in. You sat on the couch by the window, snuggled up in blankets as you soaked up the fireplace’s warm heat. You gazed out the window, aweing at the view you were looking at. So simple yet so breathtaking.
Tom had gotten up from his position next to you to make some hot tea for the both of you, his mum’s old recipe. It hadn’t already been that long but you already missed his body heat keeping you warm as you lay on him, savoring every moment with the man you love. ‘The Polar Express’ played in the background as you shifted your attention between the movie and your surroundings every once in a while, having all the lines memorized since you were a little girl.
A few minutes go by and you start to wonder what’s taking Tom so long. “Tommy?” You call out and hear the sound of a clatter of dishes coming from the kitchen, startling you. You call out once more, “Tom, are you okay?”. No answer, yet you hear his footsteps walking closer towards you.
“Sorry, Darling, I was just having a bit of trouble with the mugs” Tom lightly chuckles, but it sounded irregular. You brush it off as he goes adjust something in the fireplace, but you don’t take much notice. Little did you know, Tom was setting his phone up to record what was about to happen.
Tom lightly jogs to the kitchen to get the tray carrying your tea and his as well, walking back towards you. You give him a warm smile as he sets the tray down on the table in front of the couch, arms wrapping around him to give him a small ‘thank you’ kiss.
You pull away and Tom stands up, rubbing his hands together as he stared out the window, trying to stop his heart from beating out of his chest. This is it. You sit up and stretch your resting body, in order to be able to drink your tea without spilling it all over yourself.
Tom picks up the tray again and motions it towards you, “Here y’go, love”. You take your tea but as you do, a small velvet burgundy box reveals itself from where your mug was hiding it. No, it can’t be. You furrow your eyebrows as you stare at the box, then at Tom, then the box, then Tom before Tom picks up the box and sets the tray back down.
Your eyes are wide as the tea begins to shake because of your unstable hand, your heart pounding inside your chest. “Tom” you mumble, almost in disbelief, eyes not leaving the box. Tom licks his lips, as your eyes meet his, and kneels down in front of you. He takes the tea from your shaking hand and sets it down on the tray again, taking your hands in his.
“Y/N, Darling, I love you” Tom starts, feeling more nervous than he ever has before. “I love you too, Tom” You barely whisper, your voice wavering. Tom smiles softly at you, bringing your hands up to his lips and leaving a kiss on them before rubbing lightly.
Tom let’s out a shaky breath, before his eyes meet your already watery ones. “Honestly, I bought this ring eight months ago and I’ve just been waiting for the perfect moment to give it to you. But I realized that as long as it’s you I’m giving it to, as long as it’s you who I get to spend the rest of my life with, then it doesn’t matter because every moment I spend with you is perfect.”
Tears escape your eyes and you sniffle, watching as Tom’s eyes tear up and nose turns red. “I want to wake up everyday next to you and know that whatever I go through, you’re there with me, and wherever you go through, I’ll always be there with you” He continues.
“Wanna have mini Y/N’s and Tom’s running around us, wanna spend every snow storm with you exactly like this, wanna grow old with you” Tom chuckles lightly, making a small giggle leave your mouth between your tears. A few tears leave his eyes as both of you are full of anticipation, so scared yet so ready.
“I wanna grow old with you too” You sniffle, your cheeks streamed with tears as Tom looks at you like you were the most beautiful girl he’s ever laid his eyes on. “Thank god, otherwise this would’ve just been embarrassing” Tom jokes, his British accent heavy, making you laugh.
“Y/N” Tom says quietly as you gaze into his loving eyes. “Yes” You manage to squeak out, knowing this is it. Tom rests one of his knees on the ground, so that he’s down on one knee now. He opens the velvet box, your hands going to cover your mouth to muffle a small gasp that escapes your lips.
The ring was gorgeous. It was a light and delicate wedding ring with three small diamonds shining brightly. It was understated and minimalist in a classy way. Anyone could see why Tom chose it for you, it was fitted you. It was your dream ring, the type of ring a girl puts in her shared wedding scrapbook with her best friend when they’re eight years old.
“Will you marry me?” Tom finally asks and you nod, “Yes! Yes, of course I’ll marry you!” You giggle lightly as tears stream down your cheeks. Tom smiles widely, slipping the ring into your ring finger and both of you smile as it fits perfectly. You immediately get up and throw yourself into Tom’s arms, one his hands going to the back of your head and pushing his lips against yours.
You wrap your arms around his neck as Tom wraps your legs around his waist, getting up to lay on the couch with you on top of him, never breaking the deep kiss you were sharing. Both of you pull away with huge smiles on your face before Tom pulls you into his chest, hugging you tightly.
“Mrs. Y/N Holland, hmm” He mumbles into your neck and you pull your face away from his shoulder. Tom reaches a hand to wipe your tears before you lean in to slowly kiss him once more, “Sounds perfect”.
And when Tom posts a muted clip from the video, the whole world goes crazy at this adorable proposal, and your wedding ring which you post a picture of not that long after. You were finally marrying your best friend, the love of your life, your person.
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e-vasong · 4 years ago
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I’ve already talked about a Leverage crossover where the Hargreeves are conmen but I'm. losing it thinking about. a Leverage AU where the Leverage team sees these kids on tv, and they just go.  oh shit, that’s just fucking wrong.  (I know the timelines don’t match up but let’s pretend the umbrella kids were born a little later, or that Leverage takes place a little earlier, or something like that.  I don’t know.)
But these fucking umbrella kids show up on TV, and at first none of them are paying much attention. Not right away.  They’re busy running cons, and none of them except Hardison watch TV for fun very often.
So they’ve all heard bits and pieces about this Umbrella thing, and aren’t quite sure what to make of it.  Superhumans, huh? Eliot mutters at one point. Whatever. Our lives are already so goddamn weird.
But eventually they catch a broadcast while they’re home in between cases.  it’s playing in the background while they’re enjoying a meal together at the brewery.
The Umbrella Academy saves the day yet again! the broadcaster declares cheerily. We go now to a statement at the Louvre from their leader, Sir Reginald Hargreeves.
It’s just novel enough to catch their attention--being who they are, they all perk up at the word Louvre--and it gets them half-watching as they chat over breakfast.
It’s Parker that sees it first.  She’s Parker, so what catches her attention is actually not the fact that one of them is covered in blood, nor is it the fact that their father is calling them by numbers instead of names.  It’s the way that they stand, tense and upright.  It’s the way that the one covered in blood is trembling minutely, so fine that it’s almost imperceptible. But she notices. And she notices the way that the one to the bloodied boy’s left--the fifth one in line--leans over ever-so-subtly when their father is looking away. Whispers something with the barest movement of his lips. And then, after a moment of hesitation, he links hands with his shaking brother, twining their fingers together.  Parker knows that whisper, knows what this is. She used to do that with her brother.  Used to hold Nick’s hand, just like that, when their fosters were scaring him, trying to provide comfort even despite the fear of being caught.
It’s not long before the others follow her gaze. She’s stopped engaging in the conversation entirely, is just staring at the television with a death glare, nose wrinkled.
“Parker, baby,” Hardison says.  “That’s your angry face.”
“I’m angry,” she says, and doesn’t elaborate.
“Got it,” Hardison takes it in stride, as he always does.
Eliot’s frowning at the TV.  Unlike Parker, his eye does jump to the most obvious thing first.  To the boy, no older than eleven or twelve probably, drenched head to toe with blood.  There’s no rips in his clothing; Eliot’s pretty sure the blood isn’t his. He’s standing up straight, but his shoulders are slightly hunched.  Like he’s injured.  Broken ribs, maybe?  And he’s been taught to hide them too. He’s also not the only one with that too-stiff posture. These kids aren’t standing up straight. They’re standing at attention.  Number One, their father calls one of them, and what are those? Fucking callsigns?  
Sophie and Nate are watching too.  Their faces are carefully blank.  They aren’t happy, Parker’s pretty sure, but they’re trying not to react.
“What the hell?” Hardison says slowly.  He’s the last one to catch on, though only by a very narrow margin.  He lacks Sophie and Nate’s cynicism, and the years of personal experience Parker and Eliot have, but he’s still too smart to not figure it out almost immediately.  And he is first one to abandon the stunned stillness that’s fallen over the rest of them, pulling his laptop out of his bag, already quickly tapping away at the keys.
“This ain’t right,” Eliot says, voice a growl in his chest.  “This is--this is--it’s televised child abuse.”
Sophie makes a quiet noise of agreement then. “It is,” she says, quietly disgusted. “Those poor children.”
Nate is still staring at the screen, lips pressed flat.
“This Reginald guy looks rich,” Parker says.  Then: “Can we kill him?”
Eliot chokes on his drink.
“How is this even legal?” Sophie asks.  She sounds curious, though not particularly surprised by the grievous violation of child protection laws before her. “It’s so...blatant.”
“Sir Reginald Hargreeves,” Hardison says, no longer typing.  “He is--oh shit.” And the typing resumes, faster and a little more panicked than before.
“Hardison?” Nate prods after a moment, giving Hardison a sidelong glance.
“Yeah, yeah, it’s all good,” Hardison says.  “The INTERPOL files on this guy are locked up tight though.  Almost tripped their security system there.  I didn’t, of course, but--”
“You couldn’t get in?” Eliot says, smirking.
“Yet,” Hardison says.  “Dammit, man, it’s been less than five minutes.  Give me a couple hours and that thing is mincemeat.  Metaphorically speaking, of course.  But I do see what’s going on here and,” he clicks his tongue, shaking his head in disappointment.  “Y’all, this is hinky.”
“Yes, I think we got that,” Nate says.  The corner of his lip twitches up.
“Yeah, yeah,” Hardison says.  “This guy has got friends everywhere.  No one knows how he got the kids, but it looks like he technically bought them--”
“He what?” Sophie sounds like she’s been suckerpunched.  Parker can’t think of the last time she heard Sophie sound so shocked.
“Oh yeah.  You think that’s bad?  The numbers aren’t code names  The numbers are their name names.  Like, legally.  I just found an article that said he ordered them by how useful he thinks they are, but judging by the adoption papers it was actually in the order he, uh,” Hardison coughs, “acquired them.”
Eliot is swaying where he stands.  “Common tactic.  He’s pitting them against one another so they’ll be easier to control.  It undermines the self worth of the ones lower on the scale and makes the ones that are higher up feel obligated to do what he wants.  Son of a bitch.”
“...And it looks like he leveraged their powers as excuse to gain exemptions from child protection laws,” Hardison continues like he hasn’t been interrupted.  “Claimed their abilities meant they don’t need the same safeguards.”
“That’s bullshit!” Eliot sounds thunderous.
“I know, buddy,” Hardison reaches over blindly, waving his hand around vaguely until he finds Eliot’s shoulder.  He gives it a comforting squeeze.  “I didn’t write it.”
Eliot heaves in a shuddering breath.  “That’s just--”
“Evil,” Sophie finishes.  
“I’m inclined to agree,” Nate says.  He’s not watching the TV anymore.  He’s staring off into the middle distance, arms crossed over his chest.
“Oh!” Parker perks up.  All the grief and distress that had been brewing on her face vanishes like storm clouds parting for the sun.  “Nate! Nate, are you scheming?  You look like you’re scheming.”
Nate makes a noncommittal grunt.  “It would be dangerous.”
“They’re in danger,” Sophie says softly, jerking her head in the television’s direction.
Eliot’s long-since gotten to his feet.  He’s pacing, and that’s how Parker knows he’s furious.  When Eliot is too angry to stand it, he has to move, has to find some way to handle the rage roiling under his skin.  Usually he cooks, chopping vegetables with furious aplomb.  And when he can’t cook, he paces.  
“They’re fucking child soldiers,” he says.  “I can’t--” he cuts himself off with a furious shake of the head.  I can’t believe, he was about to say, Parker thinks, but he had to stop because that’s not true.  Eliot knows better than anyone what the government--what the world does to people they find useful, whether its skill or power that makes them so.
“Y’all are behind,” Hardison says in sing-song.  “I’m already trying to burn this motherfucker down.”
“Hardison, do not tip our hand,” Nate says, snapping into his leader-voice automatically.  Parker grins.  He’s already got a plan, then.  She knew all that reluctance was just for show.  Sophie laughs, as clear and bright as the ringing of a bell, and even Eliot perks up.  
Hardison grumbles, closing his laptop and stuffing it back in his messenger bag.  
Nate is grinning a little too, though it’s that angry smile he gets sometimes when Parker knows he’s thinking about hurting bad people.  She understands.  She's wearing hers too right now.  Nate glances them all over, and for all the malice dripping off the knife’s edge of that smile, his eyes are soft.  Maybe even a little proud.
“Fine. Fine. You guys win,” Nate says, lifting his hands in defeat.  He’s putting on a show of being beleaguered, but Parker can hear the sparking anger in his voice, and oh, how could she have forgotten?  Sophie is so gently righteous, Hardison so achingly distressed, and Eliot so full of fire and fury that she almost didn’t notice Nate’s seething wrath, nearly forgot that Nate looks at every injured child in need of help and thinks of Sam.  “Everyone, get your things.  Hardison, get us some plane tickets.  Let’s go steal some children.”
“Okay, okay.  I ain’t complaining cause, like, fuck that guy,” Hardison says, slinging his bag over his shoulder.  “But stealing children?  Could you have made us sound anymore like kidnappers?”
“Hardison!”
“I’m just saying.”
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chudleycanonficfest · 3 years ago
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Day 28, Post #1 by @floreatcastellumposts
Title: The Argument Author/Artist: FloreatCastellum Pairing: Gen Prompt: “Siblings: The only enemy you can’t live without” -Anonymous Rating: T Trigger Warning(s) (if any): Mild language
When he was a child, Ron had sometimes sat secretly on the stairs, feet in slippers too big for him, teddy tucked under his arm, listening to the goings on in the kitchen. Often his sister or a brother or two would be with him. This was especially the case when there was an argument, because they were a nosy bunch of kids, and they would grin gleefully at one another as they heard their mother roar over some issue, like when Bill came home with his first tattoo, or Charlie had done something dangerous like climb on the roof, or the many, many, many things that Fred and George had done. They would gather on the stairs and snigger and delight in their siblings being in trouble - that it wasn't them, and usually it was over something hilarious too. 
Today was quite different. The stairs were narrow, so Ginny was pressed right up against him, but she was gripping hold of his arm too. Behind them, Fred and George sat in grim, stony silence, their knees occasionally knocking the back of Ron's head, but, remarkably, none of them were squabbling.
'Is it so hard to just be happy for me?' Percy was bellowing, and that in itself was unusual, because it was never Percy in trouble. 
'It's not about that,' Dad was bellowing back, 'are you so naive? Are you really so foolish-?' This was unusual too, because it wasn't usually Dad bellowing. 
'Percy... Percy, we're just worried, we're just concerned...' Mum was sobbing. This was unusual, because she usually had a bit more fight in her, not this desperate pleading. 
'You're so cynical, the pair of you-'
'We're realistic! You've been promoted well above your grade before the dust has settled on the inquiry-'
'STOP BRINGING UP THE INQUIRY!' Percy sounded quite deranged; the ferocity of his voice made Ginny jump slightly, and grip Ron's arm harder. 'That - wasn't - my - fault! That was the point of it! That PROVED I wasn't to blame, I was acquitted-'
'Yes, and we were delighted,' said Dad, and to Ron's astonishment, his words sounded bitingly sarcastic, 'but even so, you have to see that mass scandal is not usually a precursor to promotion!'
'He SAW something in me!' 
'Yes, he did! He saw a potential spy! On our family - on Dumbledore-'
Percy let out a maniacal laugh, forced and sneering and sanctimonious, it made Ron wince as he heard it. 'And you say I'm arrogant?' 
'We've never said you were arrogant-' Mum tried to chip in desperately, but Percy continued talking over her. 
'You think you're important enough to warrant the Minister for Magic spying on you? You think he considers you in the same circle as Dumbledore? More to the point, you think Dumbledore truly respects the likes of you?'  
'Fudge has been going round making it more than clear that anyone who supports Dumbledore can clear out their desks-'
'Utter rot-'
'-He knows I'm friendly with him, he knows I have advised the school on muggleborn inte-'
'No one cares!' Percy screamed. 'No one cares about that stuff! You're ludicrous!'
'Ludicrous?' Dad echoed, with an uncharacteristic scoff to his voice. 
'Ludicrous! Not everything is a conspiracy, not everything has an anti-muggle agenda - I know what this is really about, you're embarrassed that your own son is rising above you, is succeeding where you haven't-'
'Percy!' Mum's gasp was so clear that Ron could easily imagine her hand leaping to her chest. 
'I've had to struggle against your lousy reputation ever since I started! Do you know how embarrassing it is? Do you know what it's like having people ask if I'm related to the muggle-mad Weasley on Level Two-' 
'That's enough,' said Dad coldly. 
'I lie to them, d'you know that? I tell them we're only distantly related.' 
'What the fuck?' Ron heard one of the twins whisper behind them. 'Is he serious?' 
'I never imagined I had raised you to be so small-minded-' Dad was spitting back.
'It's baffling that you raised me at all! You, who has no ambition, no sense, no idea of how ridiculous you come across with your obsession with muggles - is it any wonder you've always been passed over for promotion-'
'-Because of bigotry!'
'-Any wonder you've left your children to grow up in poverty? To be humiliated by the failures of their father?' 
'Stop it! Percy, stop it!' Mum was wailing, and whether it was Fred or George directly behind him Ron didn't know, but their knee was trembling against the back of his head. 
'It's not failure, it's a matter of principle and integrity!' Dad roared back. 'There are more important things than gold, that's what we've always-'
'You are deluded! You are so blinded by your persecution complex, by your victimhood, that you cannot be happy for your son!' Percy’s voice was hoarse and raw, whether from tears or overexertion, Ron wasn’t sure. 'You can't bear to see him succeed where you failed! To see him make something of himself!'
'Why would I be happy watching my son be manipulated and used? Make no mistake, Percy - this is no achievement, this is Fudge playing you as a puppet - if you're ashamed of your background, that's your prerogative, but there's no denying this family is known to be close to Dumbledore and Harry, and Fudge is waging a vendetta against-'
‘You’re an idiot to run around with Dumbledore!’ snapped Percy. ‘He’s heading for trouble - gone completely power mad the last few years - you know full well his glory days are over. You’ll end up going down with him-’
‘Fudge is fighting a campaign against Dumbledore when he should be-’
‘I know where my loyalties lie, and it is not with my old teacher! It is with my employer, the leader of my government, with people who look at the facts!’
‘The facts are that Harry-’
'Yes - Harry - here we go,' snapped Percy. 'You rank the word of a child above the expert testimonies and mountains of evidence brought up by the inquiry, above your own boss - no wonder he thinks you're cracked. You’re determined to see conspiracy everywhere-’ 
‘How can you say that? You saw the aftermath of what happened, you saw him-’
‘I saw the actual dead boy, I saw Diggory!’ snapped Percy. ‘Think what his family is going through, their child’s death being used as a political quaffle-’
‘That is Fudge’s doing! That is his choice! He has chosen to make a mockery of Diggory, to disregard Harry-'
‘To question the story of a teenager,’ corrected Percy. His tone was cold and quiet, the kind of sanctimonious "I'm being the grown up here, actually" patience that Ron found unbearably aggravating. ‘The only evidence is his word, it’s not unreasonable to question a witness. In fact, it’s a perfectly standard part of due process.’
Ron’s growing anger was now twisted with a kind of lurching dread. The snide little comments in the Daily Prophet, which they had all blustered and raged and gasped in revolted disdain at over breakfasts for the past week, suddenly felt sinister. As he thought about it, Percy had never joined in… had always been silent… 
‘Percy…’ said Mum, so faintly that, as one, Ron, Ginny, Fred and George all leaned forward to listen. ‘Percy, surely you… surely you believe him? Surely you can’t believe he deserves what they’re saying about him? He’s just a child - it’s like the whole world’s forgotten that he’s just a child.’ 
'Yes, he's just a child - so why should he be the centre of everything?' Percy demanded. 'Why should he shape our family? Impact our careers?' 
'Percy… if you had seen him in the hospital wing, if you had looked into his eyes…' 
'Mr Fudge was not convinced,' said Percy, as though that settled the matter.
‘Has he asked you about Harry?’ Dad asked abruptly. Beside Ron, Ginny was shaking. ‘Casually?’ 
‘I - no more than is to be expected when you have someone famous living under your roof-’
‘What did he ask? What did you say?’ 
They heard a brief, thick silence, and a sharp exhale of air. ‘He… he’s not relevant to this discussion. This is beyond - this isn’t the issue - the only evidence is his word, as I said-’ 
‘You don’t believe him.’ Dad’s voice was blank, stunned, quiet. ‘You… you know that boy, Percy.’  
‘You don’t believe in me,’ said Percy, and Ron could hear his tears now, the slight thickness to his voice, the sniffs between words. ‘You’d rather believe in some ludicrous conspiracy theory from a teenager who thinks he sees You-Know-Who around every corner than believe that your own son might have worked hard, might be talented, might deserve his career. You’d really think so little of me.’ 
‘That’s not it. That’s not it at all,’ Dad said quietly, and Mum was crying loudly. ‘We just-’
‘I don’t care!’ said Percy harshly. ‘I don’t care what you think! Not any more! Years I’ve put up with it, years! I’m going - I’m gone - I don’t want to see either of you again - you’ve made it clear that you don’t have my interests at heart, this was your choice-’
‘What do you mean?’ Mum shrieked, and they could hear the scraping of chairs being moved aside, thundering footsteps, Mum begging-
The door was thrust open, and Percy stood for a moment in the hallway, looking up at the four of them sitting on the stairs. His expression was unreadable. Tear tracks shone from beneath his horn-rimmed glasses, and his mouth was a thin, grim line. 
‘Move,’ he told them. 
‘You’re being a right bellend,’ said Fred at once. 
‘MOVE!’ 
They did not, and Mum had come running after Percy, hanging desperately onto his arm though he tried to shake her off. ‘Come on, Perce,’ she pleaded. ‘Come and sit down, let’s all cool off and talk about this-’
‘Get out of my way,’ Percy told his siblings once more, and now Ron stood. 
‘Harry’s part of our family,’ he blurted out furiously. 
 ‘He’s not, Ron,’ Percy growled. ‘He’s your friend, that doesn’t mean everything he says is right - move out my way.’ 
‘How can you say that!’ Ginny demanded. ‘What’s wrong with you? How can you say all these horrible things?’ 
Percy started climbing the stairs, pushing Ron aside and stepping over Ginny, furiously struggling past Fred and George who immediately made their bodies as big and awkward and gangling as they could imagine, shouting colourful insults at him as he pushed past and thundered up to his room. 
‘He just needs to calm down,’ Mum was squeaking. ‘Go - go to your rooms, let me and Dad talk to him-’ 
‘No chance!’ 
‘I haven’t said my piece yet!’ 
He returned just a few moments later, carrying a bulging bag with a jumper sleeve trailing out, a little line of abandoned socks and a pair of underwear left on the stairs. ‘I’m going to stay with friends,’ he said. 
‘You haven't got any,’ goaded George. 
‘Be quiet, George!’ Mum wailed. ‘Percy-’
‘Then I’m getting my own place, I’m not staying here anymore - I’m not letting you all drag me down with you. If you’re all going to be traitors to the Ministry I’m going to make sure everyone’s well aware that I don’t belong to this family any more-’
‘You do, Percy, you do - you’ll always be my son-’ Mum’s words were barely audible beneath her crying. Percy pushed past her, and stormed towards the door. 
‘Percy!’ Ron shouted, and to his surprise, Percy turned and looked at him. 
Ron could not find the words for his contempt, could not find an insult strong enough, could not decide what to do with the rage that was coursing through him. All he could hope was that Percy could feel it in his cold, hard stare. ‘How could you?’ 
Percy said nothing, simply looked back for a moment, and then turned his back and strode swiftly to the door. Mum was running after him, and though they heard the ear-splitting crack of disapparation, she stood in the doorway shouting his name. 
Dad had not followed, and with a creak, Ginny rose beside Ron and descended the last few stairs. She peered through the doorway to the kitchen. ‘Dad?’ 
Ron heard a splutter, and then dry, heaving sobs. Ginny vanished into the kitchen. Behind him, Fred and George were muttering mutinously, swearing and cursing. 
‘What’s he playing at?’ 
‘He’s an idiot. A big-headed, pompous, ridiculous idiot, we’ve always said it, we were right.’ 
‘Who does he think he is? Does he really think that promotion is normal? Does he honestly think he’s that extraordinary?’  
‘Moron…’ 
Ron’s jaw was aching from gritting his teeth so hard, his heart was trying to break through his ribcage and go after Percy to beat him. 
‘Do you really think he meant that stuff he said to Dad?’ George said. ‘It’s just…’  
‘I bet he does, the git,’ said Fred. ‘I bet he really does pretend he’s not part of the family. He’s ashamed of us. Slimy, brown-nosing prick…’ 
‘All that stuff about poverty? So uncalled for.’
‘That’s it, really, isn’t it? He’s a greedy arsehole.’ 
‘Well, he’s certainly written himself out of the will now, hasn’t he?’ 
‘He won’t care, nothing for him to inherit anyway, apparently.’ 
That prickling, heated anger was back - his very ears were hot with it, he wouldn’t be surprised if steam had been bursting out of them. The memory of Harry, pale and shaken in the hospital wing, his hands gripping Mum’s robes as she hugged him, was lingering in his mind. ‘Did you hear all that crap about Harry? Did you hear what he was saying about him? Harry!’
‘Yeah,’ muttered George. ‘Pillock.’ 
‘Why would he say that? What the bloody hell is going on with him? He’s gone bonkers. When did he turn into such a - a -’ He still could not quite find a word strong enough.  
‘Berk?’ suggested George. 
‘Something along those lines…’  
‘Easier than admitting he’s horrible, selfish, idiot snob, I suppose,’ said Fred. 
‘Money’s always been an issue, but blaming Dad like that is just…’ 
‘Nasty,’ said Ron, simply. 
‘You can make money without completely selling out and betraying your family,’ said Fred seriously. ‘You can do it and keep your integrity.’ 
‘He’s acting like we weren’t fed enough,’ said George spitefully. ‘Percy didn’t even get that many hand-me-downs, really - Mum and Dad were doing all right before they were hit with twins, and we all know Ginny was probably unexpected.’ 
‘Was she?’ said Ron distractedly.
‘Are you joking, you were only about eight months old, who picks then to decide to have another baby?’  
‘Mum.’ 
‘Fair.’ 
‘Anyway,’ said Fred, ‘Percy’s not exactly been hard done by, not really. He’s just always been ashamed we’re not as well-heeled as his smarmy new colleagues at the Ministry.’ 
‘It’s childish,’ said Ron, who was feeling another lurch of guilt as he thought back on the previous year. ‘It’s really petty…’ 
‘We’ve all wished the family was better off now and then,’ said George fairly. ‘Who wouldn’t? But that was a seriously low blow. God, poor Dad,' he added, his voice lowering further. 'I'm glad Ginny's gone in to comfort him, I don't even know where to begin.'
‘Do you think he’s really gone for good?’ asked Ron.
‘Hope so,’ said Fred viciously. ‘Hey - one less mouth to feed now, maybe the family’ll be better off.’ 
'You know what else,' Ron said sharply, his brain whirring, 'did you hear him dodging Dad's question about what he's said about Harry? Good thing he's buggered off before we go to the Order Headquarters, isn't it? Who knows what he would have blabbered about?' 
Fred was looking at him as though in a new light. 'You know what, Ronniekins, that is a really excellent and disturbing point. You're a bit of a bright spark at times, aren't you?' 
'Brighter than Percy,' Ron muttered.
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cherienymphe · 4 years ago
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Joke’s On You (Joker x Reader)
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WARNINGS: DUB-CON, NON-CON, ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP, knife play, blood play, murder, violence, 
IF ANY OF THIS OFFENDS YOU, PLEASE DNI
➥ {page breaks done by @whimsicalrogers​}
summary: you’re a part time thief who keeps getting in the Joker’s way. What starts out as rivals quickly turns into something hot and heavy, and before you know it, you’re J’s girl. Whether you want to be or not {based off of this headcanon}
~
The first time you ever come face to face with the Joker, the clown king himself, is during one of the first night’s you first started to execute your grand idea. You went through a klepto phase when you were a kid, but you never expected you’d return to it, and definitely not on a bigger scale like this.
It wasn’t like you were homeless or right on the poverty line. You had money, quite a bit in fact. One of the perks of being a stripper in the most popular club in Gotham, but there came a certain thrill from stealing from the rich in this city. Sure, you took their money on the stage, did everything you could to make them empty their pockets, but taking their money right out from under their nose was different.
You’re not sure when you came up with the bright idea, but you knew that if you wanted to keep this up and stay out of prison, you had to get smart about this. That was where the Joker came in. That clown ran this city, and you knew that with him around, no one would dare to even notice you. If you made your hits the same time as him, you could get in and out to no one’s knowledge.
It was a solid plan.
Until it wasn’t.
You almost ruin his plans to send a bank up into flames, and your eyes briefly meet his cold green ones before you’re taking off. You half expected to hear the sound of gunshots, even expected to get hurt or worse, but you can hear him telling his thugs to stand down. He doesn’t seem the least bit bothered by your presence, no real threat, and you’re unsure if you should be offended or not.
You had never seen the man himself up close before, and you’re shocked to realize that he’s taller than you imagined. More intimidating than you imagined. Despite the fact that he barely paid you any mind, you can’t help feeling like he’s going to break into your apartment and slit your throat. You’re a petty thief, nothing like the big criminals in this city, and your run in with him spooks you. It takes a long time for you to fall asleep that night.
You quickly put it behind you though and tell yourself that you just have to be more careful from here on out. It soon becomes obvious that that’s easier said than done. You hadn’t meant to get in his way when he was taking the mayor hostage. It was an honest mistake when you almost kept him from breaking some other danger to society out of Arkham, but the nail in your coffin finally comes when you do prevent him from robbing a bank truck.
You barely ducked in time as a bullet came flying past your head. You’re shaken up, but you manage to force yourself to get the hell out of there before the cops showed up and before the Joker took another shot. You should have known that he was going to be expecting you. The Joker was a lot of things, but stupid was not one of them.
You walk right into a trap, and you’re in the bank vault, hands full of money when you feel a sharp tug on your hair. You swallow down a yelp as you’re yanked back into a bare chest, and your eyes widen when a hand curls around your throat. You may not be the best villain in the world, but you’re one that can defend yourself, and the walls of the vault shake as you fight back.
He’s stronger than he looks, but you’re stronger than you look, and you both realize this when he has a gun pressed to your forehead while you have a knife at his throat. Your heart is hammering inside of your chest because not only are you once again face to face with the Joker himself, but he’s seconds away from killing you. You feel like you’re about to throw up, and he’s clearly amused.
He tilts his head at you, red lips parting to reveal a shiny grin, a laugh bubbling in his throat as he presses the barrel of the gun even further into your skin. His purple coat hangs off of him, pale chest heaving and that’s how you know that despite his grin, he’s irritated. Maybe even mad.
“…and what do they call you?”
His voice is deep, and that takes you by surprise. A lot of things about the infamous criminal are taking you by surprise.
“What does it matter? You’re going to kill me anyway, right?”
He hums, stepping closer with a sneer.
“I haven’t quite figured that one out yet…maybe I will when you tell me your name…”
“Well, I haven’t quite figured out what I want to be called,” you honestly told him.
No one but him and his goons knew about you, so you had never counted on anyone else knowing about you either. The thought of an alias never crossed your mind.
“Trying to steal my shine or something? You want to be the big dog around here?”
“Oh, please,” you scoff, and if he had eyebrows, you were sure he’d be raising one at you right now with the look he gave you.
He narrowed his eyes, and in one movement, he ripped your mask from your eyes, making them widen. He looked down his nose at you, taking in your all black attire before finally resting his eyes on your face.
“…or don’t tell me…you’re one of those girlies who thinks she can run around with me?”
You frowned at him, and he continued.
“I take it you’re a big fan.”
His tone was mocking, and you had the urge to spit in his face, but you knew that would surely put a bullet in your head, so you simply rolled your eyes.
“Hardly. With you around, no one will even look my way. Your taste for the dramatics allows me to stay below the radar,” you told him.
He hummed at that, tilting his head from side to side as he weighed your explanation in his mind.
“That’s smart, and I gotta hand it to ya, I didn’t think you were smart.”
Your frown deepened at his backhanded compliment, but it was quickly wiped from your face when he tightened his hold on his gun, and your eyes widened.
“Smart, but not smart enough to stay out of my way-.”
He was interrupted as the building shook, and you both turned as gunshots reached your ears. While he was distracted, you slipped out of his grip, ducking in time to miss a bullet before turning the corner. A recognizable shadow passed over the walls, and you ducked into a nearby hallway just as the winged vigilante himself met the Joker as he stepped into the hall.
The air hitting your face reminded you that your mask was gone, and you quietly made your way to the back exit as the sound of fighting and gunshots grew fainter. You released a sigh of relief when you made it outside, and although you didn’t have anything to show for your excursion, at least you had your life.
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A thin layer of sweat clings to your skin as you step down off of the stage, feet aching in your heels. A coworker of yours winks at you as she takes your place on the stage, and you wish her luck. Customers were being a bit stingy today, and considering your last heist granted you with nothing, your lack of cashflow today had you more annoyed than usual.
Sure, it was a Tuesday afternoon, but it was still the hottest club in Gotham. Customers of all types of backgrounds frequented the place, and although the old money crowd practically lived here, you had a love hate relationship with their kind. They tended to be the stingiest with their money despite having more than you could ever dream of.
“What time are you off?”
You turned to another girl who worked at the place, Mandy, and threw her a grim look.
“12.”
She grimaced, blue eyes filled with pity as she shook her head.
“Sheesh. Well, that’s what happens when you’re the best dancer in this place,” she said with a shrug. “Your demand is high.”
“High demand and low pay. What a treat,” you sarcastically replied.
She chuckled, but she quickly swallowed it down, eyes glancing past you. The club was already loud, but there seemed to be an uptake in noise, and you turned to find the cause. You froze where you stood, eyes wide and lips parting at the group of people who just stepped into the place.
All of the men varied in size and shape, all dressed in black as they made their way inside like they owned the place. You supposed that in a way they did. Anyone following the footsteps of the Joker probably felt like he could get away with anything. The man in question led the bunch, strutting past patrons with a dark look in his eye, green hair contrasting against his dark red shirt.
You quickly turned back around, squeezing your eyes shut as Mandy let out a low whistle.
“I haven’t seen him step foot in here in forever,” she commented.
You looked to her with a confused frown.
“What?”
“Oh, yeah. You’ve only been here for what, half a year? The Joker used to come in here all the time. They’d get a bit rowdy but what is that when he’s the highest paying customer?”
She shrugged, reaching for a tray of drinks, completely unaware of your internal dilemma. It was almost time to get back on stage.
“Have fun,” she purred, walking past you.
You took a deep breath, forcing yourself to calm down as you stewed over what you should do. Sure, you were a thief in your spare time, but you couldn’t lose this job. As much as you wanted to, you couldn’t walk out of here, so you straightened your shoulders and made your way back to your stage.
You kept an eye out for pale skin and green hair, and you were thankful to find him far on the other side of the room. He and his crew were occupied by another dancer, Mandy serving them drinks. You were thankful and carefully stepped onto the stage.
As usual, you attracted a nice sized crowd, and you made sure to keep your face turned away as you moved around the pole. You were pleased to find that this crowd was more generous with their money, but your satisfaction was short lived when your turned to find your boss gesturing for you to come off the stage. You were confused but did so anyway. He nervously scratched his dark beard as you approached, and you had a sinking feeling in your gut for some reason.
“What is it?”
He grumbled and jerked his head towards the other side of the building, and you hesitantly looked over his shoulder. The Joker’s goons were having a good time tossing money at the dancer on stage, a few of them clearly drunk. The green-haired man, however, wasn’t partaking in the festivities. His unreadable gaze was focused on you, and your heart sank when he didn’t break the stare. You were forced to when your boss spoke.
“He wants a private session with you,” the older man mumbled, and you’d be dumb to miss the fear and concern in his voice.
You internally cursed.
“You’re kidding…”
“…’fraid not. He was very clear in his…request,” he responded.
You both knew that it wasn’t a request. The Joker never requested anything, and you briefly closed your eyes, positive that this was going to be your last night on earth. Your boss placed his hand on your shoulder, gaze sympathetic…and pitying.
“Just do what he says, alright?”
He wasn’t just telling you that to make more money, but to keep you from becoming the clown’s next victim. You didn’t have the heart to tell him that your fate was already sealed. With a nod, you strutted past him and made your way to the other side of the room. The Joker’s expression didn’t change as you approached him, and you nervously swallowed. His cold green eyes seemed to follow the gesture, and you took a deep breath.
“Someone request a private room?”
Again, he said nothing, simply tilting his head to the side as his trailed his eyes over your scantily clad form. Some of his posse was still enamored with the dancer before them, but the rest had turned to not so discreetly eye you. They all looked away when the green-haired man stood, and your eyes fell to the sliver of skin that peeked through the top of his shirt, unable to hold his gaze.
“Right this way…”
You didn’t hear his footsteps, but you could feel his presence behind you as you led the way to the back where the private rooms were located. The walk was quiet, thick with tension, and you wondered if it was too late for you to start saying your prayers.
You went in first, blinking at the red glow of the room that came from the neon lights. You were shaking, stomach churning as the door clicked shut behind him. You turned to tell him to get it over with when his hand wrapped around your throat, forcing you to swallow your words. You let out a pained squeak, eyes watering, but his lips swallowed any other noise you threatened to make.
Your eyes were wide as he roughly kissed you, shock coursing through you while his mouth moved against yours. You stumbled back in your heels, but he quickly followed, teeth nipping at you so violently that you tasted blood. You wanted to tell him that this wasn’t that kind of club. This was not in your job description and was not allowed, but you remembered your boss’ words and wondered if he knew that this was what the man wanted?
Even still, you couldn’t go through with this, but his tattooed hands were ripping at your attire before you had the chance to voice what you wanted to say. Your lips were finally free to tell him off, but the only thing that came out was a yelp when his teeth sank into your shoulder. The pain you felt was quickly overshadowed by the pleasure that warmed your stomach when his fingers brushed over you.
You pushed against his chest, but his other hand grabbed your wrist, spinning you around so that your back was pressed to his chest. It happened so quickly that you didn’t have time to ponder what was happening until he was already inside of you. One hand was tangled in your hair, face pressed into the seat of the sofa as broken moans escaped your trembling lips.
His free hand was pressed into the skin between your shoulder blades, holding you down while his hips snapped into you over and over again. He was far from gentle, but every harsh stroke only seemed to stroke that fire inside of you. Your lashes were fluttering as he thrust into you, eyes rolling while you tried to make sense of everything.
You could feel his nails pressing into your back as he pinned you down, and your own scraped against the fabric of the couch while choked moans climbed out of your throat. This was far from how you expected your day to go. After all, it wasn’t that long ago that this man was trying to kill you. You fluttered around his unrelenting cock and tried to remember why that was a bad thing.
He let out what sounded like a growl above you, the fabric of his pants pressing into your skin as he ground against you, and his hand in your hair moved to the back of your neck just as the tightening in your stomach snapped. You came around him with an embarrassing scream, going limp beneath him as he fucked you through your climax, diving headfirst into his own.
You collapsed the minute he let you go, vision blurry and throat sore as you heard him zip his pants. You were still shaking, and he was already gathering himself together like nothing had happened. Like he hadn’t just fucked you delirious. You moved to stand, ready to give him a piece of your mind, but you collapsed back onto the couch.
If you didn’t know any better, you’d say you heard a low chuckle in his throat. Either way, you didn’t get to ask him because the sound of the door slamming shut reached your ears seconds later.
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The next time you ran into that stupid clown, you took great satisfaction in striking him square in the face. You didn’t care that he was surrounded by his band of hired muscle nor that you were currently standing in the middle of a jewelry store, alarm blaring in your ears almost painfully.
He gestured for the men around him to continue looting the place, seeing as they had paused to take in the scene. You knew they would have killed you without hesitation had he told them to. You glared at him as he grinned at you, bat perched on his shoulder.
“We’ve gotta stop running into each other like this,” he lowly said.
“That was for the last time we ‘ran into each other’,” you sneered. “I don’t care who you are, you don’t get to-.”
“Consider it my way of letting you get off easy.”
He chuckled at his play on words, but you weren’t amused in the slightest.
“Get off easy? Are you even crazier than everyone thinks?”
His grin was gone in a flash, and he stepped towards you, tapping his bat against his shoulder as he leaned in. His lips were parted as his eyes bore into your own, and you forced yourself to stand your ground as the scent of him invaded your nose.
“If you recall,” he slowly began. “You’re supposed to be dead.”
You swallowed, jaw clenching as he tapped his finger against your nose.
“The plan was to put a bullet in that pretty little mouth of yours. Does that…ring any bells?”
You pressed your lips together, glancing away as he let out a breathy chuckle.
“Fucking you brought me more satisfaction than killing you ever could,” he deeply said.
You felt heat rise to your face, and he tilted his head, lips brushing against your own as he spoke.
“So…I suggest you keep me satisfied…”
His coat flew behind him as he spun away, stomping towards one of his men to bark orders at them. Anger and humiliation coursed through you as you stomped outside, and you narrowed your eyes as the sound of police sirens drew nearer. With a sneer, you grabbed the knife in your holster before slashing the tires on his van.
That kept you satisfied throughout the rest of the night, but you paid for it dearly the next day at the club. This time, he hadn’t even waited until you were in the room. His hand had curled around the back of your neck as soon as you got to the door, forcing you inside as soon as he opened it.
You had stumbled in your heels, falling to your knees, and he was there before you could even rise. His hand was on your neck the entire time he slammed into you, the carpet scraping against your back. You could hardly breathe, let alone moan as he had his way with you, and you knew that he was genuinely angry this time, and you wondered how he managed to escape the police.
He was punishing you for your little stunt, but God did you love it. Your hands fisted into his bright red button down as he slid into your soaked walls, trying to pull him closer. You heard him hum every time you clenched around his throbbing member, the sound of your arousal reaching your ears. You should have been embarrassed at how wet you were, but the Joker seemed to enjoy it just fine, and besides. You saw no reason to pretend.
Like the last time, he was righting himself as soon as he was done while you lay on the floor, still trying to catch your breath. You let out a soft chuckle as he slammed the door behind him, and you wouldn’t be surprised if you weren’t even able to talk in the morning.
This little game between the two of you became something of a regular occurrence. You’d make your hits when and where he did his to avoid exposure, and sometimes things would go wrong on his end. Some mishaps were genuine accidents, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy the way he’d take out his frustration on you.
He fucked you like an animal, and you loved it because sometimes you couldn’t even form words afterwards. And best of all, he wasn’t trying to kill you anymore…just your vagina.
One day, he didn’t leave as soon as he was done. He stood over you, watching as you fought to control your breathing. When you realized that he wasn’t making any moves to leave, you peeled your eyes open to look up at him from your place on the couch.
“…what?”
You nervously sat up as he dug into his pocket, eyes widening when he pulled out the shiniest bracelet you’d ever seen. He dangled it in front of your face, a low hum escaping him as you admired it.
“Saw this shiny little number in the display. It had my little thief written all over it…”
He jerked it away when you reached for it, so you reached higher, gasping when he closed his free hand around your wrist. You watched as he snapped the expensive piece of jewelry around your arm, and you brushed your fingers over it the minute he let you go.
You were forced to pull your eyes away from it though when he harshly gripped your chin, pulling your head up so that you were looking at him. His green eyes bore into your own, face unreadable as he pressed his red lips together.
“You like it, doll face?”
You couldn’t hold back your grin, and you nodded.
“I love it,” you told him, unaware of the implications behind the gesture.
You started showing up to work with all kinds of new things. A new pair of earrings, a necklace that wasn’t that before, even some new heels that didn’t hurt your feet as much. You figured it was just a perk of fucking the king of Gotham, of keeping him satisfied.
You didn’t know that it went beyond mere satisfaction and thankful gestures.
It was a late night, or early morning depending on how you looked at it. The club was almost at its peak, the early hours of the morning being your busiest. You hadn’t seen J in a few days, but it wasn’t unusual. The man was basically running an empire.
You were servicing a client, a regular who could never stick to one dancer. He had a habit of hopping between the ladies at the club, and it looked like this week, he’d chosen you. The loud music filled your ears as you slid your hands over his shoulder, thighs brushing his as you danced on him. The bass from the music made your body vibrate, and your eyes fell closed as you fisted one of your hands into your hair, chest pushed forwards.
The man had already given you a handsome sum of money, and you knew that if you put on your best show, there was plenty more where that came from. The loud music prevented you from hearing the rise in voices as a new patron entered the club. It also prevented you from taking note of the worried chatter that had only just started to emerge, but it didn’t drown out the sound of a gunshot that you flinching.
However, you didn’t open your eyes because of the gunshot. You opened your eyes at the feel of droplets landing all over your face, hair, and clothes. You faintly registered the sound of screams surrounding you as people fled from the club, tripping over one another. You stumbled back, frozen in place as you stood up straight, hands raised in front of you as you stared at your dead customer in shock.
He was dead.
That much was more than clear, but you were having a hard time wrapping your head around it. Heavy footsteps slowly made their way over to you, and you hesitantly looked over, terrified eyes connecting with familiar green ones. His eyes were wild and crazed, green hair pushed back away from his face, gun swinging back and forth on his finger. He looked good in his all white suit, not a spot of blood on him.
You wished you could say the same.
“Are you insane?” you screamed, legs trembling.
“Well, that’s what they tell me.”
You frowned at him as he threw his head back and cackled, and you shook your head, fighting to clear it.
“Why did you do that? What’s wrong with you?”
He abruptly stopped laughing, slowly lowering his head to gaze at you. His lips parted into a mocking grin.
“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you? I leave town on business for a few days, and I come back to find my girl practically screwing some punk for the whole club to see,” he slowly said, voice low and threatening.
Your anger kicked you into gear, and you stomped towards him, a frown on your face.
“I am not your girl, and even if I was…this is my job! You know this is my job-!”
Your words were cut off, and you winced as he tightened his hold on your neck. Your feet were barely grazing the floor as he walked forwards, forcing you back. You dug your fingers into his arm, hitting at him with your free hand, but he acted as if you weren’t even fighting back.
“Those nice earrings you’re wearing says you’re my girl…”
Your stomach churned as you began to realize the serious meaning behind his gifts.
“…that pretty little bracelet on your arm says you’re my girl…”
You looked around in fear, realizing that the club was completely empty save for you, the Joker, and his thugs. You kicked at him as he forced your back onto the stage, his firm body pressing down on yours. His hold was still tight, and you felt tears spring forth as you fought to breathe.
“…and I say you’re my girl. Understand?”
You gave a shaky nod, but it wasn’t enough for him. He lifted you by the neck before slamming you back down, making you wince, and a slow grin spread along his face, revealing his shiny teeth.
“I’ve got a whole lotta toys, sweetheart. I earned those toys. I took those toys. Those toys are mine…”
You watched as he pointed his gun at the dead man still slumped in the chair.
“…and I don’t like people touching my toys.”
You didn’t get a chance to ponder on this turn of events before his lips were harshly pressing against yours. He slammed the gun down next to your head, hands pulling at your attire, and the tears finally spilled over as you fought against him. You weren’t alone, and this was a new level of humiliation that you weren’t okay with.
A man was dead. In fact, you were still covered in his blood, and the Joker’s men were just behind him, intently listening to everything, no doubt. His grip was harsh as he took hold of your wrists, slamming them down beside you. He let one go to grab his gun, pressing it into your lips as you shook.
“You gonna be a good girl? Or do I have to use this again?”
His voice was calm despite the violent implications behind his words, and you shakily shook your head.
He was rougher with you than he had ever been before. Biting you, choking you, and holding you far too tight. Part of you felt like it was done on purpose, not only so you’d get the idea, but so that the rest of his crew would get that you were his too. You cried as he pressed your cheek down onto the stage floor, hips snapping against your backside while harsh grunts left his lips.
You couldn’t handle staring at the Joker’s latest victim while he forced himself into you, so you squeezed your eyes shut. His other hand dug into your hip so harshly, you knew it was going to leave a bruise. As the minutes drew on, it seemed like his ministrations were becoming rougher, and if you didn’t know any better, you’d say the sound of your sobs were egging him on.
His grip on your hair when he came had more tears springing to your eyes, and you flinched when his lips brushed your ear.
“Clean yourself up…”
Having only been half on the stage, you collapsed to the floor when he let you go. Your hair and makeup were a mess, and you miserably stared up at him through tear-filled eyes as he tucked his shirt back into his pants, swiftly pulling on his white suit jacket.
“…the cops will be here soon, and you gotta pull yourself together. Huh, doll face?”
He forced your head back as he gripped your chin, and you reluctantly nodded. He roughly dragged his thumb over your lips, smearing what was left of your lipstick before taking his leave, leaving you alone with one dead body, and one bruised one.
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You shuffled upstairs, arms aching and eyes tight as you made your way to your apartment. It had been weeks since you’d been back to the club. Your boss, someone you were ever grateful for, told you to come back when you were ready. After all, you’d had someone’s brains blown out right in front of you…on you.
You were fortunate that no one stuck around to see J’s possessive display of ownership, so no one knew what his impromptu murder was really about. Everyone speculated that the customer had crossed the Joker in some way, a business deal gone wrong, but only you knew the truth. Only you knew that the man’s only crime had been paying for your time.
You took a break from stealing from the wealthy too. Not only did you lack the energy, but you couldn’t chance running into the Joker. Had you known what all of those gifts had meant, you never would have accepted them. You didn’t want to be the Joker’s. The last girl who got seriously tangled up with him had ended up almost crazier than he was.
Granted, you heard Harley Quinn was doing better these days, but God. Look how long it took her to get there? The thought of telling him to his face that it was over was a scary one, so you settled for just hiding away in your apartment. He was the Joker, a man who had a lot on his plate, and like he’d said, you were a toy to him. There were plenty of toys out there, and he could easily find another.
You dropped the groceries to the floor as soon as you made it inside, and you groaned as you straightened. Your shoes clicked along the floor as you made your way through your dark apartment. You turned on the kitchen light so that it would be on when you returned, and you made your way through your living room, looking forward to getting out of these clothes.
However, when you turned on the light in the living room, you were startled by the sight of a familiar green-haired villain standing in the corner like some statue. You barely swallowed down the scream that bubbled in your throat, and your eyes were wide as you took him in.
He was wearing a tux, a nice one with a white bowtie and a matching boutonniere. His hair was slicked back, and you weren’t sure where he came from, but you wanted him to go right back.
“I was enjoying a night out on the town…taunting Batsy as I like to do…”
He walked away from the wall as he slowly begun, cold eyes roaming over your apartment.
“…when I realized that I hadn’t seen my little thief for days. Weeks even.”
“What are you doing here?”
He didn’t respond, instead opting to make his way around the living room, running his gloved hands over your furniture. You didn’t realize that he was gradually closing the circle, nearing you.
“You haven’t been at work. You haven’t been in my face while you ruin my plans. You’re not hiding from me…are ya, doll face?”
You clenched your jaw, swallowing down your fear as you crossed your arms over your chest.
“I’m not hiding from you. We’re just through,” you told him.
He froze, glancing over his shoulder at you before continuing to look around.
“Did you hear me? You and I are done. Take your jewelry back, take everything you gave me and leave,” you continued.
He continued on as if he hadn’t heard you, and you stomped towards him.
“I’m serious, J! Do I need to call the police?”
That made him turn, and he wagged his finger at you like you were a misbehaving child.
“Careful,” he purred. “…because I personally know a certain thief they’d love to be informed about.”
You frowned, swallowing before pushing past him.
“I don’t care. At least in jail, I’ll be away from you-.”
You were cut off by your own scream, reaching for his hand as he pulled on your hair, forcing you away from the phone. He pulled you against him, and your eyes widened when he pressed a knife against your cheek, a hair’s width away from your lips.
“You have no agency in this arrangement.”
He threw you to the floor, and you scrambled away from him, nails scraping along the wood as he pulled you back. He cut your clothes away with ease, the torn shreds falling to the floor to leave you bear before him. The knife that grazed along your skin kept you from screaming as he undressed, but you did wince when he pressed it into your thigh, like a warning of what could come.
He took you behind the couch first, holding your thighs so tightly that the skin burned when he finally let go. Your table was next, but unfortunately, it didn’t withstand his rough treatment. The wall shook as he fucked you against it, every thrust rattling the pictures you had hung up to make this place a tad cozier.
Broken glass and broken pieces of wood littered the floor by the time he forced you into your bedroom. His knife remained in between his fingers the whole time he fucked you against your sheets. Your scalp burned from his harsh hold, and your throat hurt every time you swallowed, and you just knew that you’d wake up with finger shaped bruises in the morning. His deep voice was a constant in your ear, calling you ‘his little thief’, tsking at you like you were a confused child, telling you how much he was going to straighten you out.
When you clenched around him for a final time, your legs were thrown over his shoulder while your hands were pinned above your head by one of his. His free hand had fun cutting little nicks into your skin, greedily licking up the blood as tears continued to dampen your cheeks. He continued to push himself into you even after he came, and when he finally pulled out, your legs fell to the bed, chest heaving with shallow sobs.
“Now, wasn’t that a whole lotta fun?”
You glared at him as he sat up, a thin layer of sweat clinging to his fair skin, and your eyes traced the ink that decorated him. His green hair was in disarray, a smug grin on his lips as he pushed the strange colored locks away from his face. You could hardly even move, and you feared that attempting to would hurt worse.
You watched as he leaned over to his discarded pants, pulling out some sparkly piece of jewelry that you couldn’t care less about. You swallowed as he held it up, nearing you.
“…and here I was out shopping for something to compliment those new earrings, and you’re talking about leaving me. That’s a bit rude, but I’m willing to look past it.”
More tears spill over as he slides it around your neck, and it feels more like a noose than a necklace.
“You look like a work of art,” he says, lips brushing your cheek. “…all pretty and marked up by yours truly.”
His hair tickles your face, and he slowly leans away, dragging his fingers over your lips. You wince when he roughly grabs your jaw, pressing his fingers into a tender spot that you know is already forming a bruise.
“Now, I’ll be back in a couple of hours, so don’t do anything stupid.”
He tightened his grip at the end of his sentence, and you flinched. He grinned at you as he lightly patted his other hand against your cheek, grin widening when you recoiled.
“Let’s not do anything like that again, alright, sweetheart?” he purrs. “I’d hate to have to really hurt ya.”
~
tags: @harryspet @sherrybaby14 @darkficreposter @xoxabs88xox  @opheliadawnwalker3 @honeychicanawrites @honeychicana @nickyl316h @captainchrisstan @sebabestianstan101 @readermia @villanellevi @lokislastlove @notyourtypicalrose @coconutqueen21 @hurricanerin @buckybarnesplumwhore @quaksonhehe @nerdygirl8203 @mandiiblanche @cocoamoonmalfoy​
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sopxhiea · 3 years ago
Text
Rules
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Alfie Solomons X Friends with Benefits!Reader
Summary: The dancer tells Alfie her decision and the gangster is pleased to say the least but she needs to take a leap of faith she finds impossible to.
Part 1
“Stay in bed with me, it’s warmer here.”
“Just kiss me.”
He has not come.
The lights are dimmer today, only focused around the center as the girls slowly move. It’s the newer ones today, sickening smiles as they move fluidly to the sound playing from the background. The heart shaped decorations glow in the darkest parts and it’s a busy night, the weekend special.
You’re not dancing.
The job entails entertaining for the most part, smiling at dirty handed rich men in pretty lingerie. You’ve done it for a while now, known as some of the very best. Your soft giggle fills the air as the gentlemen next to you smile at you, they’re regulars, nice men who don’t get touchy and ask nicely if they want to. You decide you don’t mind and the thought of him leaves your mind.
Just for a moment.
He comes around the house still, every now and then with the excuse to see how the place is doing. He’s not as touchy but you see the need in his eyes. You hear he hasn’t been to the brothel so you wonder who’s taking care of him the way you had been but you suppose it’s not your business.
You suppose you’ll go home and put yourself in a bath much like you imaged yourself doing this very morning. You left for work around the evening and returned home in the am, sometime when the sun peeked through the horizon. The rules were still intact, he came over before work and never after. 
He still kissed you like he was trying to tell you something but you didn’t think of it.
You couldn’t.
Relationships were messy, even if they weren’t with a scary big gangster. You had moved because of him, almost had to change jobs and you weren’t even officially his girl, just someone he fucked on occasion but even that had put you in danger. Being with him would kill you, you were sure of it.
So you packed your things in the back of the club, cleaned off all your make up while humming the song that had been playing in the club earlier. You take off all your clothes and put a comfier set on, then your thick coat on top and bid farewell to the girls.
And just before you start walking home, you see a familiar face.
----
There’s some blood on his shirt, chest specifically but he isn’t bleeding. Not that you can see of. A low smile resides on his lips, one of reassurance as you make out the rest of him. He’s wearing all black again, except his not so white shirt anymore. You gulp once, out of hesitation before you speak.
He hasn’t called. But you’re not about to run into his arms.
That’s not you, and he knows it. He knew you wouldn’t gasp happily when you saw him or your pupils wouldn’t widen. All you give him a look from head to toe and you’re back to his eyes, speaking in an indifferent to his wounded form.
You don’t seem to care.
“What’re you doing here? It’s late.” your voice is not hushed but quiet still. He makes it out in the empty street and takes a breath, struggles but doesn’t show it.
“I thought I fuckin’ gave you a driver, yeah, for a fuckin’ reason, lass.” he speaks, not even sparing a glance at the blood on his shirt or the redness of your eyes.
“They were your reasons.” you speak, as a matter of fact and biting back a response entirely too quickly. 
He waits for you to comment on the blood on his chest and worry over him ,gush maybe but you don’t.
“Let’s get ya’ home then.” he says, looking over his shoulder to the car behind him for a split second before looking at you again. 
He watches you mull over the decision and even though you won’t ask him about the blood, he sees the worry in your eyes. The worry you so desperately try to hide from his own eyes. You get into the car and sit quietly.
And you don’t ask.
About the blood on his shirt, about the slight shake of his hands or the absence of one of his rings. You don’t ask about why he was waiting for you in front of the club at 5 am or why he seemed desperate for you to go with him.
Those are the rules.
-----
Long after you get out of the car and make your way into the house, he follows you inside. He watches you like a prey, waiting for the optimal time to attack as he always does but you figure you’ll let him have it. You have missed him after all.
And then, the morning comes into its usual place.
With him on top of you, groaning every now and then and panting your name in a way you’re sure he’s never done with anyone else before. You wonder how he used to be when he was younger, a different man perhaps but the thought flies away with the movement of his hips, too rough for anyone but just right for you in the dawn of the morning.
Your lips find his and he’s quick to respond to your kisses with sloppier ones. He’s tired today, you can tell and there’s frustration in his movements and the way he squeezes the soft flesh of your body. You don’t complain, you love this version of him much like the softer side so your lips are sealed as he takes the frustration out of you.
“Alfie.” you plea, but it’s so soft it catches his attention and the moment it does, you start kissing him as softly as the words.
He melts.
This is why he comes to your door and not anyone else’s. 
He won’t admit to it just yet but you know of it already. He relaxes under your touch, the exhaustion caused by the entire day he had slowly seeps through his body onto the floor and he’s calmer again. He groans, his face hidden in the crook of your neck as he keeps moving but his attitude halts.
He watches you when you try to catch your breath after both of your are done. Your chest rises with every breath. You lick your lips, reaching for the glass on the bedside table and take a big gulp from it before offering to him but he shakes his head. 
He wants it to be easy but it’s not. 
You make a move to get out of the warmer bed into the cold air of your bedroom but he pulls you down. A groan leaves your lips before you plant yourself on the bed, face down. A chuckle leaves his lips before he speaks, voice close to your ears as he fixes the strands of your hair away from your face.
“Stay in bed with me, lass. It’s warmer here.” his voice is softer today, after you’d told him to take it easy in your way during sex. He listens, you think, really listens and it makes it harder for you to stay away from him.
He’s warm, inviting and you find yourself thinking about him often these days. It’s not love, but it could be you think. You need it not to mean anything, you need it to be something very casual and not something you get attached to but a voice tells you it’s already too late.
And then he wraps his arms around you on the bed.
“Fine.” you speak, not putting up any form of fight because you’re tired and he’s warm. “No round two.” you speak and his familiar laughter fills the air.
He nods, a smile on his handsome face as he speaks. You think you’d be so happy with him in another life, not in this one. “Alright.”
And he doesn’t ask about the nightmares that night, just holds you through them.
-----
It’s like he’s mocking you.
He knows you’re not going to do it.
It’s his way of challenging you, you suppose. You’re the one with the power in the relationship anyway so he finds little ways of teasing you. It’s not a relationship, you correct yourself. It’s....something, certainly not a relationship. You wait for him to knock on your door again, come to you unarmed and open, waiting for you to help him and wrap your small body around his much larger one.
And he does, he comes with open arms and charming eyes.
He knows you’re not going to knock his door, he learns that soon enough.
“Isn’t this exhausting for you?” you speak, genuinely curious of the answer.
He raises his eyebrows, hand tugging at his beard once more as he usually does before making a confused sound. He’s sitting on your couch, in the middle of the living room and looks up at the new plant every now and then to try to figure out what it is. You ask him the question and it’s easy to see the confusion on his handsome features, he needs an explanation.
“What?” he says, the voice coming off as offensive although he has not meant it to sound that way.
“Do you not want a relationship?” you say at last, something that had been bugging you for the longest time.
You know he does, he craves domesticity and it’s easy to see. It’s in the way he keeps you close outside, the way he plants small kisses on the inside of your wrists and the top of your head. He lingers after fucking you, makes you tea and cooks you food and it makes you wonder how lovely he would be as a partner to someone who deserved it, someone who’d love him as much as he needed to be loved.
“Nah.” he says like it’s easy and he had the answer before.  You glare at him and he clears his throat before speaking again. “Not without you, yeah.”
You scoff first but it turns into a hearty laugh.
You’ve seen him with blood on his hands, covering his knuckles and his crisp white shirt. It startles you, for all he is, he’s still gentle with someone like you. You see the doubt in his eyes, they’re directed at you and it makes you wonder just how long this will keep going if you let it.
The answer is somewhere between a week and forever but you don’t dare to take the chance. 
“This isn’t working, not with you askin-” you start speaking, voice more offensive than you intend it to be but you find you want him closer than you can admit.
He catches your words before you spiral down to the hole he knows well. You let him this time, there’s a frustration in his eyes you want to hear out.
“What the fuck have I been askin’ from ya’, right, that you didn’t give it to me fuckin’ willing?” he speaks, voice a bit too high for him but you know his rage swims around the surface, waiting to catch on with him.
“Alfie....You want a wife-” you speak and he’s about to cut you off but you speak once more, voice gentler this time as an attempt to calm him down a bit more. “And you should have one. It’s not me. You know my job, you know how I live. If you want to come around every now and then for a quick fuck, that’s fine by me but if not, you need to find someone who’s going to give you what you want.” you finish and his hand tugs at the damn beard again, the beard you run your hands through every time he stays over. 
“And what exactly, yeah, ya’ think that is, lass?” he asks, wanting to hear what you really think he wants.
When all along, it’s you. 
Alfie doesn’t just go out and meet women, even the ones he’s met through upper fixers have not stuck around. He goes to brothels, or used to, and gets his business done. Easy and quick, no attachments and nothing to keep him tied to someone else.
But he finds himself lingering, almost weirdly.
He finds himself thinking about you in strange hours of his day, misses your face more than he could vouch for and he tries to stop. He’s a man of control, he’s known for that after all but his thoughts betray him every step of the way that leads to you. He feels wounded sometimes, a heavy weight on his chest each time he thinks about it.
“I don’t...exactly know but I know it’s not me who’s going to give it to you.” you speak, sure of yourself at the end of the sentence but it takes you a while to get there. 
Alfie stands up, walks towards you and comes close so that your chest is skimming his. You don’t dare break eye contact, no, this is all about the use of power and you have no intentions of letting him win. He’s about to ask something, and you know exactly what it is and it scares the hell out of you but you promise to be honest.
“Yer still goin’ to work?” he asks, mirroring his words from weeks ago and watches your eyebrows furrow. You gulp once more and speak, not so sure of yourself anymore.
“I am.” a nod follows your words and he knows you’re about to break.
But unlike what you’d thought he’d do, he doesn’t push.
He moves away at first, not putting any more pressure on you but your body betrays you and you follow his movements. You remind yourself of the rules, the rules that had brought you to this point. You sigh, things had been going so well so far and now things seemed too complicated.
You had been warned but you hadn’t listened.
You look at his face and decide, it’s not too late.
You extend your hand to him, much like some gangsters he knows do on a daily basis. Your hands are smaller than theirs, softer too and there’s a smile on your lips. This is you reminding him with a soft tone.
“Friends first.” you speak and the words echo in his mind.
It’s the first rule of the agreement you’d made.
Friends first, fuckbuddies second.
He takes your hand in his, shakes it almost hesitantly and you offer him another smile. He nods when you shake his hand, no smile on his plump lips but you retreat your hand from his after a second and speak once again, your words are breathy this time.
“Just kiss me this once.” it’s more of a plea that comes out of your lips and he’s not a man to leave a lady hanging.
And he doesn’t.
His lips move automatically against yours, not in a robotic way but in a way that’s easy to follow and tells you that he’s been wanting to do this. He only gets to kiss you during sex, only when you’re not able to respond properly but this, this he needs. 
He swallows all of the little sounds that come out of your lips as he kisses you, his lips don’t move to your neck like they usually do. With his hands on your jaw and waist, his lips clash with yours until you can no longer breathe and have to take a step back for some air. 
“I-uh..” he watches as the words leave your lips, a different kind of glassy look in your eyes as you try and search for the words that will tell him just what he needs to know.
Don’t go, I need you.
“I need to get to work.” you speak, a mere whisper leaves your lips once more and this time, he watches you leave with a clear purpose. You put all your work clothes in one bag and don’t bother cleaning the place up.
He watches as you walk towards the door to leave but realize he’s been standing there the entire time. Your eyes meet his then, shy for the first time in his time of knowing you. You gulp, keep the door open and speak without meeting his orbs.
“You can stay if you’d lik-”
“Do you have the fuckin’ answer?” he speaks and you know what he’s talking about.
Why?
He is the one keeping your bed warm, the one making you see stars and he’s asked the question before: the question of why you’re still going to work.
“I do.” you say, confident as you make your way out of the apartment and a shout echoes through the corridors. His ears perk up at the sound and he watches you leave.
“I’ll give you the answer once I’m back from work.”
-----
Tagging: @clairecrive  @parkbearum @sourirez  @vetseras @mollybegger-blog @babylooneytoonz @peakascum @fuseburner @ttzamara @babaohhhriley​
A/n: Lowkey very late and i apologize for that butttt this series will continue after a while, i think. There’s still more on the way but do let me know what you thought of the chapter <3 hope everyone’s summer is going good.
You can comment under the post if you’d like to be tagged <3
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ohheyitsokay · 4 years ago
Text
nicknames
Pairing: Din Djarin (The Mandalorian) x reader
Wordcount: 2.3k
Warnings: none to my knowledge, just a silly thought I strung out
Summary: the things we call each other are an intimate look into how we regard them
>>
“Why do you call him Mandalorian?” Cara was never subtle with you. You had been friends with her for years, and you should’ve known she would notice something after only a few days of your traveling with the three of them.
Shrugging, you looked at her. “I never told you?” You’d completed a lot of tasks together, as a very well balanced pair. And honestly you’d become close quickly, so it surprised you that she didn’t know you inside and out yet.
“I just feel like nicknames are too affectionate. On my home planet they're…” you searched for the word, not wanting to offend her, “intimate? Soft, maybe?”
Cara's dark eyebrows drew together.
“Mando… it sounds like a word some use for ‘dumpling',” you laughed, and her confusion broke - she grinned at you. “Mandu,” you offered, trying to explain. The words were similar under your tongue, thus the core of your problem.
“I cannot walk around professionally and call a warrior I just met dumpling.” And she nodded, laughing along with you.
It was too ridiculous, too cute, and far too intimate. Even without the double meaning, you didn’t want to be overly familiar with the Mandalorian. After all, you would only be traveling with him a few more days, and you’d hardly talked.
The mission went smoothly, however, and you were surprised to find that they offered for you to continue to team up with them. Another set of skills was welcome, and another pair of eyes on the little child was even more so. Your resolve stuck, though. It just didn’t fit, to call him anything other than the title he had given you. And you liked him a bit too much to open that door for yourself.
-
Din Djarin knew there was something special about you from the very beginning. He wasn’t sure if he liked it, at first, but certainly he had been very aware.
You were interesting, for someone in his field. Not at all the large, muscular fighter that he was used to seeing. But also not a seedy assassin. He’d learned quickly that your skill set came primarily in observation. You had no need to manhandle or shove your way to your bounty, instead choosing to melt into the background and watch until you’d identified the perfect strategy.
It made the first week of the job so much easier, he was content with the idea that you would travel and work with them. But then:
“How did you even know that corridor was there?” Cara was clearly excited by your field work, too. She was hardly paying attention as she walked through his ship into the cockpit.
Shoulders rising slightly, you followed her. “Micro-glitch in the holo-projection shield. I’m sure the Mandalorian's helmet identified it too.” You looked at him.
You looked right at him.
Effortlessly, your eyes found his through the visor. You were smiling a little bit, unaware of his state of shock.
Din had been wearing this helmet long enough to be used to never truly making eye contact with people. Sometimes a person got it right at random, but he could feel the difference – they couldn’t tell. But here you were, your gaze in his casually, like there wasn’t a solid layer between you.
He shrugged, reminding himself to get it together. As you turned back to Cara, he felt like he could breathe again.
Din had heard stories, children’s tales, of catching your soulmate’s eyes across the cantina - or maybe a palace room?, and being drawn together by fate. They were ridiculous, of course, but the very idea that you could bring up the memory was more than jarring.
Still, surely this was a one time thing, and he could forget about it.
For the first few weeks, it seemed like he was right. You rarely directed your gaze in his direction, anyway, being very professional and what he could only assume was shy.
You were more than happy to help with the child sometimes, and you talked freely to Cara, but in his presence you were polite and quiet. All your tasks were completed with efficiency and you would often complete other’s just because of who you were as a person. Normally, this was ideal for him - useless chatter had never been something he was good at. He was more than occupied making sure something was not breaking or mysteriously floating away, or they weren’t in danger. When you offered him silence, he should have been content to do the same, and watch the stars race by.
But… well, Din wasn’t sure he liked that either. Certainly it was strange to feel seen by you, but it felt worse that he could be making you uncomfortable, particularly as his comrade. And the more and more your eyes met his, the more it became exciting, and if maybe he wanted you to be even more than that.
So how could he get more if you hardly ever talked to him? Din shook himself, feeling silly for having zoned out in these thoughts. After all, he didn’t really talk to you, either.
-
After two months traveling with this strange little group, you were more than settled.
It took no time at all: you had hung up a spare scrap of fabric and made a little room for yourself, and the team functioned like a well oiled machine.
You got up before anyone else, this particular day, and were happy to enjoy the quiet sounds of the Crest as you checked everything needed for the day.
“Good morning, Mandalorian,” you heard the weight of his footsteps through the quiet halls. You didn’t even need to turn around, focused on correcting the flight pattern of the ship.
He had not questioned the use of the full title, had hardly questioned you at all. Outside missions, you two had only had a couple of actual conversations which seemed at first to be just fine. But there was a small nagging in the corner of your mind. His armor and helmet made reading his behavior hard, but you couldn’t quite shake the feeling that something was off between you two. His body language was … almost gentle with you, not the same as he was with the little one, but as if he was afraid you’d startle if he wasn’t.
Unbeknownst to you, he had grown to like the way you said Mandalorian. It rolled off your tongue, as if it really was his name, as if you liked to say it. Din had been increasingly nervous about making you feel uncomfortable, awkward in his efforts to learn about you enough to make you stay. The prospect of sharing pieces of himself with you had become an indulgent fantasy, if only he could figure out how to talk to you.
“Good morning,” you could hear the sleep at the edges of his voice, and the softness you’d learned to recognize.
You hummed for a moment, thinking, before adding, “Good morning too you, too, little one.”  You were rewarded with a sleepy little noise, and you smiled as you finished your task before turning towards them both. Thank goodness the child was awake, and you hadn’t caused any problems. His wide eyes were staring at you from above his father's armored forearm, and you smiled. It was these moments you were reminded of mandu – he was being soft.
You looked up to the Mandalorian, half wanting to tell him, but he stiffened: his shoulders rising and back straightening. Biting your lip, you averted your gaze.
“Do I make you uncomfortable?” you turned back towards the stars, letting him think in silence for a moment.
“No,” he said, and you both relaxed. Whatever it was between you was gone for now, and you sat together, listening to the child wake up fully and begin to babble. It occurred to you that maybe he relished these moments, the times in which there were no expectations weighing on his shoulders. You wanted to give him more of those, if possible, to thank him for accepting you into his fold. Besides that, you spent much of your work life manipulating people, and you certainly wanted to establish that you weren’t like that here.
“How did you do that?” his voice, clearer now, interrupted your thoughts.
“Do what?” the Mandalorian rarely initiated conversation with you and it caught you off guard.
“How do you know what… is happening? What is going to happen?” he tone was genuinely curious, and you had to think before you responded. Of course, he knew you mostly just took the time to be more observant, instead of throwing yourself in head first. That’s not what he was asking.
“People are the same wherever you go. The more you watch and the closer you listen, the easier they are to predict,” you said, trying to be both brief and candid. “I was almost no one where I come from. One day, I decided instead of hating that, to use it.”
A small, deep, thoughtful hum came from the helmet beside you.
Silence settled over you for awhile before he quietly begin to talk.
Din told you of his people, his creed, and for the very first time you felt as though you were actually getting to know him. It was nice, not being professional.
“Do you ever want to be seen?” the conclusion of his talking was another surprise for you. Of course, this man who had sworn not to have his face shown would wonder at your apparent comfort with it.
The question felt as if it was seeping into your mind as you pondered it. It occured to you that this conversation had made you ache to be seen by him.
“I think everyone wants that, in their own way,” you said, and as you finally turned towards him, he held your gaze and nodded.
-
For someone so smart, it was infuriating how you seemed to completely miss the way he was around you.
Din Djarin, a warrior, had finally mustered up the courage to ask you to help him with a bandage on his lower back. The gentle touches and soft brush of your skin against his were foreign, but wonderful.
Unfortunately for him, you had noticed his awkwardness and assumed it was your fault. Ever the problem solver, you’d found a piece of mirror and rigged some wire to hold cleaning pads. It effectively made it easy for him to patch himself up on his own – and ruined the chance for him to steal your touch.
His previous fear had been wrong – you were not soulmates across the room, instead comrades sharing the same space. You were not exactly story royalty, but in spite of that, he was still falling hopelessly for you.
The way you talked to people – who weren’t bounties – with care and kindness. How good you were at your job, and how nice you made their shared space. How you laughed and rolled with the punches that came with this lifestyle. Din had never met anyone quite like you, and beyond all reason, he wanted to know everything about you, share all of himself with you. But you were so clever and polite it made him want to bang his head against a wall.
He couldn’t stop trying though, to get closer to you. Previously, you and Cara had left him and the child occasionally for a personal missions, and it left his feeling strange the entire three days. When you came back his heart had felt light and he wanted desperately to hold onto that feeling.
It wasn’t the same, when Cara went out for the afternoon a day or two after the patch up incident. In fact, he quite enjoyed the jolt of excitement that came with a whole few hours of potential.
Din couldn’t finish his tasks fast enough, even putting the child down for an early nap before nervously setting out to find you.
As expected, you were settled in the common area, reading through articles on your upcoming bounty. He sat next to you, willing himself not to betray his heart with his behavior and scare you away.
He said your name, his blood pumping even before you met his eyes.
“Yes, Mandalorian?” he had no idea why he was so nervous. He’d rehearsed this moment in his mind, it had been aching to be brought to life.
“You… you can call me Din… Djarin.”
It was not exactly as planned.
You’re eyes, ever in his, were wide.
“Din Djarin,” you said it reverently, before saying, “I promise I will keep it safe.”
He held back a small groan. There you went again, being so considerate he was afraid you’d never actually use it.
The frustration overwhelmed him, filling him with boldness and he pressed into your space insistently.
“No,” he said, “Well, do, but use it, please. I cannot stand you calling me Mandalorian like nothing has changed since we first met. I trust you, use it.”
You were adorable, the fear of his confession was damped by how intoxicating it was to be close to you. His hands found you, turning your body in your seat so you were facing him, and settling on the tops of your shoulders. He gently tugged you into him, encouraged that you didn’t pull away, but relaxed into his touch.
“I don’t want to slip,” you said, your voice barely audible.
The forehead of his helmet was so close to yours, you could feel your breath bouncing off of the mask.
“Please,” he said, and it smashed through all the walls you had created.
“Din Djarin,” you said again, tasting it on your tongue. You felt metal above your eyebrows and realized your eyes had closed, savoring the intimacy of the moment. You didn’t open them, allowing your heart to beat at lightspeed, and the tingles radiating from his gloved hands flow through you.
He was being soft with you.
“What if we compromised?” you could hear the smile in your own voice, and he gave a rumbling hum. You wondered if he was as absorbed in this moment as you were, unable to think straight.
“Mandu,” you murmured.
He was silent for awhile, the only indication he heard you being his palms, which slid to where your shoulders curved into your neck.
You could almost hear him thinking.
“I don’t understand,” he finally said, nearly inaudible. Your hands had reached out for him, one wrapping around the armor on his forearm, the other in the soft fabric on the side of his neck. He was distracted, bliss clouding his brain.
“Dumpling,” you said, and if it were anyone else, he would have thrown you across the room. “When you are being my strong and capable leader, you will be Mandalorian,” you continued, unaware that your words and actions were making his whole body fill with warmth and pride. “When you are being yourself, at home with us, I will call you Mandu – it sounds enough like Mando that no one will know it’s because you are truly soft.” He found himself smiling, despite his embarrassment. For you, he was soft. “And I will call you Din when it is just us, and I can be with you as you are now.”
There was no question that these moments would come again. He had made you give in to reading him completely, without any personal doubts.
“Okay, cyar’ika.”
<<
Taglist: @fangirl-316 @scribbledghost
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high-functioning-lokipath · 4 years ago
Text
Prompt: "I'll Be Here To Protect You" - Loki x Reader - Words: 2,564
A/N: This sort of follows the oneshot "Worthy" but can be read alone. Basically, Reader is Silver Shadow (see Marvel character list for reference), Loki and Reader are married, yada yada, you'll see…
"Silver? I think you should take a look at this," Cap said over the comms. You, Cap, Loki, and Widow had gone to investigate a Hydra base you'd received intel on. You'd been informed that the base was abandoned but that they still had some records stored there.
"On my way," You replied to the Captain, teleporting over immediately. "Oh my goodness," You gasped at the sight that greeted you. There, lying curled up in a small cage, was a girl no older than 5 or 6. Cap ripped open the cage and gently pulled her out, holding her in his arms. She whimpered slightly and you could tell she'd been beaten. Instantly, you wanted to kill the people who'd done that to her.
"Can you help her?" He whispered, not wanting to startle her any more. You nodded and held out your arms to take her. As soon as you touched her, you started working.
"You might need to hold me up," You warned the Captain. "This is going to be tiring."
"Alright," He nodded. "Then let's get you out of here." He easily lifted you both and carried you out to the quinjet. You vaguely heard him talking on the comms but were a bit too focused to actually make out his words. He set you down on one of the chairs with the girl curled up in your lap. After a while, before the others got back, she seemed to be healed and sleeping. You were exhausted so you adjusted yourself slightly in the chair and dozed off as well.
"Y/N?" You turned your head, eyes still refusing to open with exhaustion, and groaned slightly feeling the kink in your neck from sleeping weird. "Y/N! Please wake up, hm? Please?" Someone said. Now they were poking your arm. Your other arm however seemed to be asleep, as you couldn't feel it, and you had a weight on your legs and chest. Suddenly remembering what all had transpired, your eyes shot open. "See? I told you she would wake up if I did that!" Natasha said, with what you knew to be false happiness, to the girl on your lap. The girl simply glared back at Nat before turning her attention to you, with a completely different expression. Her eyes widened and she tried smiling as though she was out of practice and waved slightly.
"Hi there," You smiled. "My name's Y/N. What's yours?" She frowned and looked away before mumbling something. "Hm? I couldn't hear you," You said.
"Helius," She replied with a frown.
"Oh," You replied. "Well, do you like that name?" She shook her head vigorously. "Would you like a new name? One just as pretty as you?"
"Really?" She asked, eyes lighting up once more.
"Yep! And then you'll have a special name for yourself! Just like I do, and just like Natasha," You said pointing at the redhead. "And-" You were about to point to your husband when you realized for the first time since waking back up that he wasn't with the team anymore. Your eyes darted back to Nat who looked worried.
"Y/N?" The little girl said quietly, pulling on your sleeve.
"What is it, dear?" She whispered in it in your ear and you nodded. "Oh yes, um. The bathroom's right over here." You took her over and opened the door.
"I get to use that?" She asked, surprised.
"Yes," You replied slowly.
"Wow! You're really nice!" She hurried inside and closed the door herself. You stood there for a moment, shocked, and Nat walked up behind you.
"She's not even accustomed to using a normal bathroom, Nat!"
"Those people, if they even should be called that," she said, shaking her head. "Are monsters." You looked around once more, trying to see if Loki had shown back up. "He's up with Steve," She said, pointing to the cockpit.
"What? Why? He's willingly spending time with the Captain?" You said teasing.
"He said he needed to think."
"Did he give any clues?"
"Not verbally. But I think he's nervous."
"About what?" You exclaimed. She nodded towards the bathroom door.
"Being a Dad."
"A Da-" you interrupted yourself, chuckling lightly. "You think just because we found her means we'll be her parents?" Nat smirked and nodded. "First of all, Tony will probably have a cow if we wanted to keep her."
"Well your husband had a horse, may I remind you."
"That was a made up story! Would you please stop referencing it!" You shrieked.
"Only when it stops being funny," She laughed.
"Second, there's probably already some rule in place that states we need to put her in the custody of Child Protective Services."
"We'll see about that."
"She's yours!" Tony said 2 hours later once you'd arrived home and gone straight to a conference room to meet with him.
"What?" You exclaimed. You hadn't even had the chance to talk with Loki yet. You glanced outside the room at the girl sitting in the hallway. The whole team was there with you but Loki had still not said a word. You looked at him but he refused to make eye contact and you couldn't read his expression. "Don't get me wrong, Tony. She's wonderful and I think she deserves the world but why?"
"You found her! Who knows if she has powers? It's best to have one of our own caring for her just in case. And besides, according to Romanoff's story, the girl practically glared daggers into anyone else who came her way."
"Alright I guess. I mean," You sighed. "Loki? Darling? Um, what do you think?"
"You've already made the decision, Stark. I will respect that and allow my wife to make the necessary changes to our living quarters to care for the child. Now is there anything else you'll be needing at the moment? I need a shower."
"Uh, no. It's-we're done," Tony said, seeming surprised at Loki's attitude just as you were. You all started to head out but Tony stopped you for a moment. "Here," He said, handing you a credit card. "Buy whatever you want for her." You smiled and shook your head.
"What do you know? The man of iron does have a heart."
"Yeah but don't tell anyone," He chuckled.
About a week later, Helius was in her new bedroom, thoroughly showered in gifts from Tony, but still not talking to anyone. Neither was Loki for that matter. You yourself were exhausted, staying up late nights keeping the girl company when she woke up screaming from nightmares. When you eventually came back to bed, you often found your husband had gotten up already and disappeared somewhere to 'be alone'. With Helius, you offered her a few ideas for a new name but she didn't like any of them. You even told her some ideas the others had suggested but she hated those even more. You seemed to be the only one she was comfortable with. With Loki, you'd tried to talk to him, even calling and texting him but he wouldn't answer. Today, though, you decided you needed to do something about both of them or else you were probably going to go crazy. First, though, you had some formal paperwork to take care of with Tony in order to have legal guardianship of her.
"I don't know what to do about it, Stank," You sighed, hours later. Tony wrinkled his nose slightly at the nickname but listened. "Half of this I honestly still can't fill out for you because she won't pick a name. I don't know how to make her socialize and I sure don't know how to get Loki to spill what's bugging him." Tony got up and walked to your side, putting his hand on your shoulder.
"I'm not sure what to tell you either, Shiny."
"Watch it," You hissed, whipping out a knife you always kept on your person and holding it dangerously close to his baby-maker. He backed away quickly.
"Maybe you just need to corner your husband and, uh, pull that trick on him," He chuckled nervously. "Ok, well, um, just hold onto that paperwork and send it to me when it's done, alright?" You nodded and gathered it together before heading back to your floor. It was early afternoon and you thought you may have a shot at talking to your husband while Helius took her nap. She'd found her own little routine to keep her occupied during the day in her room even when you weren't there. But you always had to be home when she slept because of her nightmares and she refused to socialize with others.
"I'll be in the bedroom until dinner is ready," Loki said upon your return.
"Can we please talk first?" You asked.
"There's nothing to discuss," He replied, quickly walking to the bedroom and slamming the door.
"Oh yes there is!" You exclaimed, teleporting yourself inside the bedroom.
"I hate when you do that!" He yelled.
"Well I hate when you do this! Now man up and tell me what's wrong or I really will back you in a corner with my knife!"
"I don't want to talk about it, alright?" He hissed. "Now keep your voice down or else you'll alert the child that we're having a disagreement."
"Oh, so you're finally acknowledging her?" A guilty expression flashed over his face and he turned away. "What is it, Loki?" You pleaded. "I don't want to argue. I just want to know what's going through your mind. Ever since we found her, you've been-"
"You found her," He said. "I want no part in raising a child that is not my own."
"What about your own blood?" You asked, wondering for your own future if he was against kids in general or not.
"I-" He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "I don't know. But I certainly don't want to adopt. I've never seen a good result of adoption."
"Oh," You said slowly. "So that's what this is about."
"What do you mean?"
"You're worried about your own background. Is that it?"
"I don't know what you're talking about," He huffed, crossing his arms and further distancing himself from you.
"Loki, please. Listen to me. You may not have had the best family situation yourself, but that doesn't mean you won't be a great Dad. I think-no-I know you'd do wonderfully! Please believe me!"
"I-"
"Mommy!" A voice called out, sounding frightened. Your eyes and Loki's widened in surprise. She'd never called you that before.
"I had better check on her," You sighed. Loki nodded and you rushed off. Half an hour later you came out of her room to find Loki waiting for you on the couch.
"What happened?"
"More nightmares," You groaned and slumped down next to him.
"Is that why you're never in bed anymore?" He asked quietly.
"Yeah. It seems she can't go more than half an hour without having another one." He nodded silently and took your hand in his.
"Well, I suppose I should commend you for your sacrifices for her. I just don't know if I can-" You shushed him, pressing a finger to his lips.
"I understand, Loki," You smiled sadly. "Mind you, I don't exactly agree. But I respect how you feel. I guess I can talk with Tony tomorrow about finding her a new home." You got up quickly, to hide your own emotions from him, and went to prepare dinner. That night, Loki made you go to bed extra early so you could actually get some sleep. You appreciated it, but your internal clock had gotten so used to it already that it woke you up a few hours later about the time Helius would be having her first nightmare. When you didn't hear anything from her room, you got worried. You rushed out of your bedroom and, as you approached her room, heard voices.
"Where's mommy?" Helius cried, again sounding frightened. Drawing your knife outside her closed door, you were ready to teleport in a surprise whatever intruder was there.
"She's sleeping, sweetheart. Do you think your new Dad could help you?" You nearly cried at hearing Loki's voice so soft and gentle with her. It took you a few more seconds to process that he'd referred to himself as her 'Dad'.
"I thought you hated me," She whispered.
"I don't hate you, little one," He assured her. "Do you want to know why I haven't talked to you yet?" You didn't hear a reply but as Loki went on you could only assume she nodded. "I never had a good father. And when you came along a week ago, I was so worried that if I tried to be your father I would mess something up. And I couldn't let that happen because you are too wonderful and too beautiful."
"I don't have a beautiful name," she sighed.
"Hasn't mommy come up with any good ideas?" He asked.
"No, well, yes but I didn't like any of them. They're pretty but," she trailed off, leaving the sentence unfinished.
"May I suggest one of my personal favorites?" You cracked the door open just a little so you could see. Their backs were to you, sitting on the edge of the bed. Loki had his arm wrapped around her as she curled onto his side, dwarfed by his height even sitting. She nodded slowly in reply to his question. "How about Arabella?"
"I love it!" She exclaimed, standing quickly and jumping up and down. "Thank you, Dad," She said smiling brightly as she threw her arms around his neck for a hug. He was surprised but gladly gave her a somewhat awkward hug back. "But what if the monsters come back?" She asked, voice trembling slightly.
"I'll protect you."
"Always?"
"I, Loki of Asgard, hereby make a promise to you, Arabella, my daughter. I'll be here to protect you forever and always." Arabella hugged him again and started crying. "Why are you crying, my dear?"
"Because you're the most bestest Dad I could ever ask for."
"Well, I, uh, thank you," He stuttered, not used to that kind of compliment. "I've got an idea. How about tomorrow morning I introduce you to some of the others here?"
"Why? I don't wanna!" You bit back a chuckle at her childish exclamation.
"But they're all really nice and they'll be like your new Aunts and Uncles!"
"Well, maybe," She conceded.
"Good! Now why don't you go back to sleep and I'll stay right here until all the monsters go away for tonight." She nodded and gave him another hug before allowing him to tuck her in. You smiled, wiping away your own tears, and snuck back to your bedroom. A couple hours later, Loki snuck back in himself.
"So how's the bestest Dad doing?" You whispered. Loki tensed up when you said that.
"So you heard us?" He said. You got up and wrapped your arms around his waist from behind.
"Yep," you said. "And I couldn't be happier. You really mean it? This means I don't have to talk to Tony tomorrow?"
"Absolutely not!" He replied grinning.
"Well then I have some very exciting news for you." He turned around, quirking his eyebrows questioningly. "How would you like to be a father to two?"
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21burritoseavey · 3 years ago
Note
Hey love!
How are you?
I hope you are doing good.
Can we please get a pt2 of secret relationship and where’s my love
hey! here's pt.2 to 'where's my love'. FINALLY. The pt.2 to 'secret relationship' will come a little later:) 
a/n: without giving too much away...Daniel finds Y/n...and this sucks ergogeijhet
warnings: mental illness. please read at your own discretion:)
Where's my love Pt.2 (d.s.)
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 9:27am 
 “Hello,” Daniel rubbed his dreary eyes with the back of his hand, holding his phone between his ear and shoulder tightly as he lifted an energetic Kobe up to his chest. 
“Hi Daniel, it’s me, Victoria.” 
Daniel took a second to recall who this person was. Victoria, he whispered to himself, finally remembering that she was one of Y/n’s work friends. A smile smeared across his lips slowly, and his eyes lit up with a small glimmer of hope that Y/n would just be at work, and she’d be safe...and warm...and okay. “Oh, hey! You work with Y/n, right? Is she at work right now?” He asked, trying to tone down the sudden excitement laced in his voice. 
“Actually, that’s why I called. She didn’t come to the office yesterday, or today.” Her voice was quiet, and despite only hearing her voice through the phone, Daniel could sense her worry. He tried to ignore the pit in his stomach. 
“W-what? No, no. There’s no way.” He stammered. “She went to work yesterday.” He clenched his jaw tightly. 
“No, she didn’t...Look, I just wanted to ask, next time you talk to her, can you tell her I called?” 
Daniel nodded. He didn’t have the guts to tell Victoria he hadn’t seen Y/n in more than a day and he simply let out a “yeah.” in reply. 
“I’m just a little worried is all.”
“Yeah,” Daniel nodded again, “I’ll tell her.”
“Great, thank you Daniel. She’s lucky to have you.”
He didn’t even try to mutter out a steady reply before hanging up the phone. He tapped on Y/n’s number and waited impatiently as the phone rang, ultimately going to voicemail after a few long seconds. Daniel didn’t know what to do with himself. With the new information he’d just been told he tried to piece together where Y/n might’ve gone but...nothing. His mind went blank, and he shamed himself for it quietly as he paced the living room. Christian’s door opened rather silently and padded from his bedroom to the kitchen, catching a glimpse of his brother. 
“Hey, Daniel.” Daniel looked over his shoulder. “What’s up?” He took a shaky deep breath before speaking. “Y/n’s missing.” “What?” “She’s gone. I haven’t seen her since yesterday and her co-worker called me, and she wasn’t at work yesterday or today and I literally have no idea where she could be. What should I do?” Daniel rushed out, scaring himself even more as stared at his older brother, awaiting his reply. The two boys shared identical panic-stricken faces. 
“Do you wanna call the police?” Christian asked gingerly. 
Daniel chucked humourlessly. “Y-you don’t think she’s actually in danger, right?” He answered the question himself. “No, no. Sh- she wouldn-” “Look, we should call them just in case, just to make sure.” Christian assured, walking back towards his bedroom to retrieve his phone. 
Daniel stopped in front of him and walked backwards, closer to the front door. “No, I can find her. I will find her. Don’t call!” Christian barely had time to at least compromise with his younger brother before the door slammed with a loud thud. Daniel was rushing out towards his car with his keys laced in his fingers and untied sneakers nearly slipping off his feet
The studio came into view as Daniel took his usual right turn - almost speeding - towards the contemporary style building. He knew it was far away from Y/n’s workplace, which was where he planned to drive next, but he always needed his best friends. Especially today. 
The automatic door gaped open as he rushed into the studio, running down the corridor that was lined with multiple studio rehearsal rooms. Daniel’s eyes flickered towards the window to look at his bandmates around their microphones and instruments. He swung the door open.  
“Hey,” Daniel started, lifting his gaze to his friends sitting on the mini sofas around the sound board. “Guys?” The overlap of voices that lingered in the room and the background plucking and strumming and playing of instruments sent him into overwhelm. “Everybody shut up!” Daniel hardly ever yelled, but when he did, it was more etched with stress than anger and the rise in his tone startled the boys working in the studio. They looked over their shoulders to peer at Daniel, who had a hopeless frown on his face and eyes shimmering with tears. “Daniel? Hey, we missed you this morning.” Corbyn chuckled gently, placed his guitar down to lean on a nearby chair and walked towards the doorway.  
Daniel stayed still, suddenly the reality of it all settled right there. “We need to go find her.” They boys knew what Daniel was talking about and they all exchanged concerned glances with each other before turning back to the fearful boy in front of them. 
“Like now. We need to go now, come on!” He gestured to his car outside. 
“Okay,” Jonah said, getting up as he grabbed his car keys. It took a little convincing from their management and other members of their team, but the boys did ultimately get permission to leave rehearsal early. The boys all followed Daniel’s request and headed out of the studio. Since Daniel was basically brimming with worry, Jonah suggested he should drive as they looked for Y/n. 
The car of concerned boys wandered the streets and roads with furrowed brows and narrowed eyes, peering out in hope that Y/n would be found. Daniel raked a quick hand through his hair. “God. I hope we find her,” Daniel melted further into his chair tiredly. “Can you drive faster?” he breathed. He knew Jonah couldn’t, but panic was running high, and he had no idea what to do with himself. 
Daniel’s gaze drifted out the window, and he kept his chin in his palm as he thought for a moment. “We gotta go to the beach.” Daniel said, glancing towards Jonah in the driver’s seat beside him. “Y/n loves the beach.” Despite the long car ride so far, the boys didn’t argue with him one bit. They all knew first-hand what it was like to feel that heart wrenching fear and concern that emerged when texts or calls go unanswered. Of course they all loved Y/n dearly, but they could’ve never imagined just how terrible Daniel was feeling. 
Daniel was right about Y/n. She was at the beach; a place she appreciated devotedly and always went when she wasn’t feeling like herself. The beach looked dozy as it rested in the afternoon glow. Y/n always liked it that way, where the rich blue surface rose and fell easily or where the sun illuminated the clouds with thin streams of light. Y/n ambled along the sandy shore, slowly at first. Hesitant. She took agile steps towards the sea that ebbed ever so gently beneath her feet. 
The band got to the beach not long after. Jonah stealthily parked the car on the edge of the curb. They had no idea where Y/n was yet, let alone that she had plunged deeper into the freezing water. And Y/n, was utterly clueless to the boys that were on the razor’s edge of panic only a few metres away from her.  
The coldness of the water stung her skin, futile compared to the sting of melancholy in her heart. The sea was like an icebreaker to her, and from there Y/n found it easier to wade across the water despite its aggressive waves pushing her towards the shore again and again. 
Daniel leaned his arms on the front of the car and leaned over to look for her from his spot on the pier. He was casting his eyes warily, straining to any sounds with eyes and ears. 
“She’s over there!” Corbyn called after hearing her feeble sobs from across the beach. He pulled at Daniel’s shirt so they could run over to her together. Daniel’s whole body shot up at Corbyn’s words but before he could even stumble out any words, the little, slightly blurred image of Y/n knee deep in the water made his blood run cold and he felt a wave of...something rush over him. Corbyn, Daniel and Jonah called Y/n’s name profusely as they clambered down to the beach towards Y/n. Jack and Zach lingered near the shore, shaken and scared. 
“Y/n!” Daniel yelled, wading through the relentless water as fast as he could to get to her. “Y/n! Baby?! Come here!”
Sorrowful body-shaking sobs racked Y/n’s body, weakened by her walking, each coming in a wave, and she let out soft whimpers. There was no doubt that Daniel was crying too. He let his tears roll down his face and drop into the water as he got closer to Y/n. 
“Hey, hey, hey...” He repeated quietly, finally able to get a hold of her. Y/n clung onto him limply and Daniel wrapped his arms around her, as sure as the sun shining down on them. Y/n couldn’t focus on much. The overwhelming hovering birds orbiting around her or the splashing of water against her skin filled her cloudy mind. “I’m sorry!” Y/n sobbed, “I’m so-sorry!” her sorrowful apologies infused with the crashing waves and surging tide. “I thought it would make me happy, Dani. I didn’t make me happy…. I-it didn’t make me happy she repeated. 
“It’s okay, it’s okay.” Daniel repeated. “You’re okay,” 
Y/n’s voice was thick with tears and Daniel tried his best to wipe them away. Corbyn and Jonah were right at her side too. Their hands hovered over her back and arms just in case her or Daniel needed that extra help. They all walked towards the shoreline silently. 
---
The car ride was silent. Y/n was cuddled up comfortably in a cocoon of Daniel’s sweater, Corbyn’s jacket and a small blanket that Jonah found in his trunk - tending to Y/n was a team effort - and despite scaring the boys to death, she was glad to feel the sense of warmth and love that mingled with their wary supervision. Particularly Daniel. And she felt awful that she made him feel the way he did. She kept her gaze out of the window and let her mind drift to thoughts of sleeping in his warm bed when they’d get home. The security and cosiness of it all was comforting and she let her cool face lean against the glass to warm under the sun that cascaded down through the car windows. 
No matter how hard he tried not to, Daniel couldn’t stop blaming himself for what had happened that afternoon, barely an hour ago. He sat stiffly in the driver’s seat, his knuckles white from the cold water and the lingering glint of panic present in his eyes. The roads shimmered in the midday sun and the city buildings stood tall, piercing the blue sky as they sparkled in the distance. The faraway horizon was a feast for the eyes, but Daniel didn’t care. The world was all a blur to him, and the only view his eyes would focus on was the one right in the seat beside him. 
When they arrived back at his place, Daniel noticed Christian through the front window as he parked the car. He was standing right near the foyer with Kobe held securely in his arms. Daniel smiled to himself and glimpsed towards Y/n before he hopped out of his side of the car. As he walked around to her side, Y/n let her eyes linger on his figure trudging across the front of the car, particularly his tired, red eyes, either from crying or lack of sleep. She gazed at him as he opened her door. 
Daniel pressed a hand to her back with his hands gently holding hers as she stepped out. Y/n sighed tiredly as her feet hit the ground and she felt his protective hands upon her rosy cheeks, “You alright?” 
 Y/n nodded. He pressed a kiss to the same spot without a word and let his forehead rest against hers. 
“Y/n,” Christian breathed as they walked through the door, guiding the clueless dog away from her as he scrambled around her excitedly. His paws tapped lightly on the wooden floors and Y/n dropped her gaze at the gentle sound, pulling a smile towards the wide eyed puppy that hadn’t seen her in a couple days. She looked back at Christian. “Hey, Chris.” She spoke gently. Daniel kept his hand placed behind her back and he shared concerned glances with his older brother. 
“We should get you to bed now, Y/n.” Daniel whispered gently, linking his arm in hers as they walked to his bedroom. 
“Have a good sleep, my love, okay?”
Y/n nodded. “Okay,” she held out her hand to hold Daniel’s, and he placed it lazily over hers, bending down to press a kiss to her hair as she kissed his knuckles gently. “M’kay, I love you.” He threaded his fingers through a strand of her hair before pulling away. “I’ll just be in the living room.” He assured her. 
---
3:32pm 
“Here you go,” Daniel turned around to Y/n, “your pancakes...or what I call, little bits of happiness.” Daniel beamed towards her the best he could and placed the plate on the tabletop. 
“You think I could get about a thousand of those right now?” She joked. “The...happiness, I mean.” She let a gentle smile tug at the corners of her lips as she spoke. It was a small smile, but a real one. 
 “There’s my girl,” Daniel whispered. He rested his forearms on the counter and leaned in closer to dust his thumb over her cheek. “There’s my happy girl…” His quiet voice wavered between them and he finally let the tears in his baby blue eyes drop onto the counter. 
Y/n’s heart virtually broke as she watched him cry and sniffle silently. She dropped her fork and cupped his face in her hands. “No, no, Daniel...” Y/n’s voice lowered in sadness and with best efforts, she tried to continue steadily for both their sakes. “I’m okay, I’m okay, really.” She rushed out, lifting Daniel’s limp chin upwards to meet her eyes. 
“Why did you do that?” 
Daniel’s strong words echoed inside her like a ripple of guitar strings. She thought for a moment, dropping her hands back to her plate of pancakes. “I don’t know...I don’t know what I was thinking.” Daniel didn’t answer. Her genuine response didn’t seem to heal the intense, aching hurt that lingered in his heart from the hours before. 
Y/n sighed before continuing, “I’m...I-I feel like I’m being pulled into different directions...I can’t deal with it all! I’m just getting overwhelmed with school and work..,and you’re always busy,”
“I knew it. This was all my fault.” Daniel sighed, lifting his hands up in front of his face.
“No, no. It’s not, none of it is. You are the sweetest, kindest guy I know and it’s not your fault I did...that,” Y/n said quickly. 
“We-were you trying to…” Daniel pressed his fingers to the nape of his nose before his tears could fall again. He took a shaky inhale before continuing, but Y/n did it for him. 
“No, I wasn’t…trying to hurt myself.” She said honestly. “I just need a break from…”
“Us?” Daniel asked quietly. 
“No,” she said strongly, meeting his gaze with a subtle smile. “I need you more than anything right now. I just...need a break from work, and maybe school.”
“Okay,” Daniel’s eyes misted over again as he spoke. “Don’t ever feel like you need to hide things from me, okay? I love you. And when you need to talk and I say I’m busy and all that, you let me know that you need to talk, okay? We can talk whenever you want.”
“Okay,” She muttered with a smile. 
 Daniel lifted her chin up to look at him. “I know this won’t all go away, but it’s a start.” 
“Yeah, it’s a start.”
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Text
Tall Part 2/?
Prompt: Tech is too tall for his own good. Constantly hitting his head on objects and desks as he works on projects. The other bad batchers make fun of him for this but you find it endearing.
Tech X Reader
Slow Burn/ Angst
Warnings: Mild 1.11 Spoilers, Deviates from canon
Word Count: 1.5K
Part 2/?
partly inspired by this gif 
(it won’t let me put it in but its the one of tech catching omega)
Omega nudges you awake from where you are napping in the pilot’s seat. The small girl’s blonde head peeks over the arm of the chair as she looks out the window. 
“Look!”
The sounds of explosions and blaster fire are erupting from the city center a few klicks away. You quickly lean forward and start firing up the takeoff controls for the Marauder. You are sure your boys are the ones behind the explosions and you smile gently as you imagine Wrecker’s gleeful expression as you see a cloud of smoke rise into the air in the distance.  They can’t be too far off if the nearing sounds of blaster fire are any indicators. Omega rushes to the landing ramp as Hunter’s voice crackles in through the comms. 
“Omega! Get ready to bring the senator aboard!” Hunter sounds a little winded and Wrecker cackles in the background as another explosion rocks the tunnel they were in. You remember the new security system Tech put in place and shake the last cobwebs of your nap out of your mind as you recall the specifications that he had told you about before leaving. Your hands fly across the panels as you disarm the system and lower the landing ramp. You head to the ramp as Omega jumps up and down waving at the men as they trek towards the ship. 
“Ladies! Meet the newest passenger of the Havoc Marauder, Senator Avi Singh.” Hunter introduced you to the senator and you looked him up and down. The senator doesn’t look like he’s all that happy to be leaving his planet in the hands of the Imperials. Singh is wringing his hands and has a look of worry on his face. 
“I should not leave my people. They need me here!” The senator says quietly. Echo leans in with a hand on the senator’s shoulder. 
“If you stay here you will be hunted down and murdered. It is better to live to fight another day than to die unnecessarily.” The clone looks almost defeated as he tells the senator this. Singh’s shoulders slump forward as he takes one last look around his planet before boarding the ship, nodding in agreement at Echo’s words. 
The trip back to Cid’s bar was uneventful to say the least. The senator and his droid are quietly sitting in the cargo hold. You offered him a cup of caf earlier but he graciously declined. The men are scattered around the ship as hyperspace speeds by. Echo and Hunter are attempting to sleep in the bunks while Wrecker and Omega are playing Saabac on the box that functions as a makeshift table. You just poured yourself a piping hot cup of the precious brown liquid that keeps you going through bouts of insomnia caused by the nightmares and the general lifestyle of the Bad Batch. Wandering up towards the cockpit, you aren’t expecting to trip over Tech’s long legs that are stretched out into the aisle. 
“Kriff!” Tech curses as your cup spills slightly onto the top of his blacks. He slides out from the wall he was buried in and starts looking around for a towel to wipe the hot caf off of his shirt. 
“Sorry! I didn’t see you there!” You frantically bend down to help him. You grab one of his grease rags from the toolbox you notice off to the side and dab at the stain on his shirt. 
“No worries. I will be fine.” Tech strips off his shirt and you swear you can feel the temperature of the air heat up several degrees as you realize just how close you are to the taller clone. “There. No harm done. Would you mind putting this in the laundry for me? I need to finish this last bit of wiring before heading back to check on the flightpath.” You flush as you tear your eyes away from the bare chest of the man in front of you. 
“Hm? Sorry! I’ll just get right on that.” You hurry away with the stained shirt and a blush on your face. You left your cup of caf on the floor near where Tech was working. He let out a small chuckle as he steals your drink. Not his fault if you left it in your hurry. 
The ship lands back at Cid’s bar without incident. The senator thanks you all graciously and departs into Cid’s office to discuss payment. Wrecker and Omega not so sneakily sneak off to get Mantell mix and Echo follows them at a distance to make sure they stay out of trouble. Tech goes to the bar to get a drink and you sit beside him to discuss the mission. You flush as you think about the previous night on the ship and you clench your jaw to avoid licking your lips at the thought of the bare chest of the taller clone next to you. You aren’t ashamed to say you dreamed of the expanse of skin and what it might taste like while you were in your bunk after that episode last night. 
“Am I boring you? I can stop if you would like.” Tech looks concerned as you zone back into reality and realize you have been watching him with a blank expression for a beat too long. You blink in surprise as you shake away the untamed thoughts that have been plaguing your mind. You really can’t be anymore obvious in your crush can you? At this point you might as well have a giant sign that follows you around that says “This person has a crush on the tall nerdy one!” 
“No!” You exclaim a little too loudly and get some irritated looks from the other patrons of the bar. “Sorry I'm just distracted today. The mission has me a little rattled. I am not used to being that deep into enemy space.” You say in a quieter tone.
“We are also not used to it. I always knew we would make it to Raxus someday however I never thought about it being to save the seperatist leader. Echo was most displeased about the idea and protested greatly. I tried to convince him that it was just a job and we need to pay off our debt to Cid but he does not see it this way.” Tech seems saddened at his brother’s inability to see the mission without the politics. You can see Echo’s point of view and point out to Tech that Echo’s trauma probably makes it hard for him to trust the separatists seeing as they had kidnapped and tortured him for 2 years before he was rescued. 
“The Techno Union treated him like a computer! An algorithm! Barely even human! I really don’t blame Echo for not trusting the separatists. He has barely recovered from the trauma of being in that machine for so long. He is still really pale and frail and you haven’t finished working on his new limbs yet so he still has the prosthetics they forced on him. Speaking of which, if you need help working on those I am always available. He has every reason to be upset about this mission.” 
You are fully involved in the discussion and don’t hear Echo and the others enter the bar as they make their way over to you and Tech. Echo catches the tail end of the conversation and tries to announce their presence with a small cough that turned into a hacking one that left Omega looking concerned. Her big round eyes are full of unspoken worry as she gazes up at him. Echo glances down at the young girl and forces a smile, patting her head. 
“I am fine little one. Don’t worry about me.” He says reassuringly.
Hunter leaves Cid’s office with her and the Senator. He comes over to where the group has gathered and steals Tech’s abandoned drink. He chugs the rest of it and gestures for the group to follow as he heads back to the ship.  Tech stands up and offers his hand to you to help you off of the bar stool. He has a habit of making sure none of the Bad Batchers fall over, a habit he has picked up from their upbringing on Kamino where the other 3 clones were not the best balanced due to their enhanced abilities. Your face flushes again as you become uncomfortably aware of how close you two have gotten during the conversation. He leans away from your touch as if he also hadn’t realized how close you two had gotten. Tech turns to follow Hunter out the door and has to stoop a little to avoid hitting the door frame, Echo cracking a quiet joke about not having to worry about hitting the top of door frames since he lost a few inches. Only Omega and you caught the joke and you give a chuckle as Omega just looks confused. 
“The legs you see? Lost a few inches? Oh well.” Echo gave up on explaining the joke to the kid and followed Wrecker out the door towards the ship. 
Once back on the ship Hunter announces that they have been given a few days off courtesy of Cid since the mission went so smoothly. The other bad batchers glance at each other, not sure of what to do with their new time off.  You were pretty sure they have never had free time in their entire life.
“We could visit Cut and Suu? See how they are settling in!” Suggests Omega. 
“Too dangerous for them. We attract too much attention. The last thing they need is to be recognized as republic sympathizers.” reasons Tech. 
“I think we deserve a few days of downtime! We can take a well deserved vacation and rest up before the next mission.” you say as you pour a cup of caf from the pot Tech started when you arrived back at the ship. “We can get some repairs done on the ship and maybe even explore the city! I know Omega has been dying to go to the museums in the city center since we got here and I'm sure you boys would enjoy it too.” 
Hunter thinks for a moment and nods in agreement. 
“Sounds like a plan to me.”
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imjeralee · 4 years ago
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I had this stuck in my mind for a while. It’s a Xiao headcanon and I was just curious about a few things and this happened. It’s about how he met his S/O:
You met Xiao when you visited Wangshu inn; you’re a musician who had just graduated from Sumeru Academia and had spent a few months travelling around Liyue with a band to find some footing in life
You played at inns and parlours and your recent excursion led you to Wangshu Inn; your band has been booked in to play for a week
But for some reason you feel lost and feeling as though you are meant to do greater things in life and so you’re determined to find your true purpose in life, your calling, somehow
Anyway, so whilst the rest of your bandmates went off to visit Liyue Harbour, you end up meeting Xiao on your first night; you go to the top floor to check out the beautiful scenery, then pull out your jade flute which you had taken with you, placing it to your lips and playing a melancholic melody
And suddenly this handsome young man appears from out of nowhere, standing on the railing of the balcony (Isn’t that dangerous?) and he regards you with piercing amber eyes
“Where did you learn to play that song?” He asks, almost with a tinge of urgency.
“Huh? Oh, um, my mother taught me how to play this song.“
“Then... that flute…”
“It was my mother’s.”
The young man would proceed to leave swiftly and quietly without another word and though you were startled by the random encounter, you’d shrug it off and continue playing
Little did you know, he was seated atop the roof, listening to the remainder of your melody
Next day, you asked Verr Goldet about the strange young man and she tells you that you had met the adeptus who resides at the inn.
“What do you think?” She asked with a smile.
“He seems lonely,” you replied. He’s not quite what you had in mind.
Later, Xiao arrives at Verr Goldet’s desk and asks her about you. “Oh, we invited them from Sumeru Academia.” She says, “and they’re going to be staying with us for a week. You should watch their performance should you get the chance.”
Xiao doesn’t reply but when you come back from your trip and it’s time for your band’s performance, you spot him at the very back, sitting quietly on his own with his arms crossed and a plate of almond tofu in front of him. 
He doesn’t exactly like the music your band is playing and is more interested in what you would play as a solo but you don’t have any opportunities for solo performances, and you’re not even playing the jade flute
Therefore, you meet him again when you’re outside, at the top floor
You both look at each other before you grin and say, “What is it? Would you like me to play the flute for you again?”
His expression goes dark and you quickly try to shake off any misunderstanding.
“….Do whatever you want.” He then mutters, but you suppose this means he isn’t against you playing the flute, either
He leaves but as you begin playing, you feel that he’s closeby anyway
(Indeed he is, he’s sitting on the rooftop again, silently watching you play)
Afterwards, you notice that Xiao begins to follow you around though he stays in the shadows and doesn’t appear to you and you pretend not to notice him
You meet him again when you head off to Nantianmen and accidentally get spotted by a Geovishap. You have no experience in battle and believe you’re done for, so you’re surprised when the adeptus appears and defeats the beast. You didn’t see him get hurt, but he appears to be suffering and in agony for some reason after the fight and you’re unsure how to help him until you remember your mother telling you that the song has healing properties so you whip out the flute and play the song
To your surprise, Xiao recovers and when he’s better, you both return to Wangshu Inn and your band are packing up to leave now
Xiao watches you join your group but before you go, he says, “If you ever need help, speak my name.”
Although you know he will never show it nor tell you, he appears displeased knowing that you’re leaving
You ask Verr Goldet about Xiao and why he was in pain and she tells you his background, then she says, “He thinks you’re a slither of good karma that entered his life.”
“He...does?”
She nods. “Do you know how karma works?” 
“I guess so,” you say, “What goes around comes around. You reap what you sow etc etc.”
She shakes her head. “There’s more to it than that. You and Xiao must have met before in a different lifetime. And in that lifetime, you are either indebted to him, or he to you. That’s how people are linked, and that’s how you came across him again in this lifetime. Your paths have crossed before and will continue to cross. That’s why you meet people for a reason. It’s not a coincidence.” 
Before you leave, she tells you another story. He had once saved a young woman from monsters and she saw that he was in pain. She had nothing on her possession except her jade flute and she played a song hoping to help him somehow. She saw the soothing effect of the music it had on him and with her findings, assisted the author who wrote the ‘Tour of the Land of Liyue’. She had discovered a way to comfort a yaksha.
This flute apparently also contains magical properties and is one of a kind
You realise that your jade flute is the one mentioned in her story and that it had actually been passed from your ancestors to you
And essentially you’re the only person who knows this particular melody and the only person who has this only flute, and something clicks in your brain. You can help ease Xiao’s pain.
You stop walking with your group down the path and everyone turns round.
“What’s wrong?” They ask.
“I’ve found my calling.” You say with a smile, before you rush back to the inn and drop your bags at the door. “Ms Goldet!!” You exclaim, “I’m sorry if this is a strange request, but is it possible to give me room here for as long as I want? I mean... in exchange for board, I can provide entertainment.”
Verr Goldet is confused for a split second but then she realises what you’re trying to do and smiles. “Of course!”
Later that night, Xiao wakes up in pain but it quickly dissipates because he hears the song.
Strange, he thinks to himself. You should have left, no?
He leaves the room where he sees you playing the flute on the balcony. You don’t stop playing but you manage a smile at him
He will scowl at you for a moment but you know he’s glad you’re here
From that moment on, Xiao begins to sleep a bit better at night 
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