#healthy snacks for kitten

[catswarmth]

Omw to grab some snacks 😋

[magnoliasandarson]

Selina Kyle and Talia al Ghul are Tiger Moms to their boys.

"Kitten" and "Habibi" are shouted in encouragement and reprimand frequently on Gotham rooftops. Both Jason and Damian would prefer it if the two stopped showing up to their events, whether it be Damian's fencing tournaments or Jason's interrogations, Selina and Talia stand together yelling advice and cheering (they also have a tasteful assortment of healthy snacks in case one of the boys forgot to eat).

[zorosbeau33]

Courting Gifts~ One Piece Omegaverse Headcanon Part 2!

Starring: Zoro and Law! x gender neutral reader Genre: Fluff, sfw AU: Omegaverse, Omega Reader Wc: 1480 TW: Mentions of battle All Characters here are legal age or older in my au~ Masterlist~ Part 1~

He gives laid-back alpha vibes. He kinda has to be in order to keep up with Luffy and stand up beside him as right hand.

He was super subtle, SUPER Subtle! He didn’t want anything to change, but at the same time he wanted you to know he’s there and he cares.

It's small things because he’s fine loving you without the return. Just stay healthy and safe for him thats all he wants…and to see your smile sometimes aimed his way

It started at first with small things, handing you a cold drink when it's a scorching day outside. 

Gently tying your hair up for you with a hair tye thats the color of his haramaki/or slipping a beanie over your head in that color if your hair is short to take care of you in cold weather

Offering you to try his precious Sake, yes you alone have that privilege 

You want sword fighting lessons? He offers them quietly one night while the others are busy. He is barely suppressing the purrs as he gets to hold you, adjust your grip and teach you the motions by holding you within his very muscled arms.

Quality time is huge for him, that's his way of spoiling you

He gets you a cute dangly earring in his shades of green, maybe a tassel, maybe a teardrop on a thin chain, maybe a carved jade flower whatever it is. He spent weeks searching for it as he wanted to ensure it’d be something you’d like

There are the other things though. A pair of his gloves on a winter island end up in your possession. 

You have so many of his shirts when did this start? You don’t know but he always has a tiny smirky smile when he sees you wear one.

If he happens upon a snack he think you’d like he buys it while lost. Gives it to you like its nothing but his ears are red. “Here for you.” And then tries to walk away. He doesn’t want or need you to say thank you, he actually gets a bit (very) flustered and tries to leave quickly if you do try to thank him and gets defensive and pouty if you try to tease him about it 

The bookmark you had looked at in the store when you were getting him unlost? Suddenly appears in your book on a bench in the Thousand Sunny with his scent lingering all around

Zoro isn’t into extravagant things, especially not presents. He just doesn’t see the point (unless you want a sword that he is gungho for). He does buy you any nesting things if you say you need them.

Personally however he would prefer to be your nest. He loves taking naps so to have you biscuit his chest and the blanket he’d scented for you, while you both take a well deserved rest? He is all for this, both before and after you get together. Warning though you will always have at least one of his arms wrapped around you. Even in his sleep he’s watchful when it comes to you, ready to draw a sword and protect you

He has a small book that he has sketched some drawings of your face with painstaking detail. 

Once he’s over you knowing about his top secret hobby, he would be honored and flustered to design you a tattoo if you wanted. It's in his traditional style very Japanese traditional painting style but he’d work so hard on it for you.

Is a sucker for anything with your scent. He doesn’t mind wether you smell of him too much. But he is always secretly longing to have your touch, your taste, your scent burned into his soul. It makes him miss you less, and it keeps him calm.

Would be the crew member to bring home a little kitten for you if you were ever down (he had to beg Nami for permission, and promised to clean up after it). Just one, only ever the one kitten. But he makes sure its taken care of best he can to his knowledge including getting Chopper to check its health over before he gifts the sweet and goofy thing to you.

The kitten like him has a scar and recalling how gentle you were with him he decides out of all the lucious cats, this scrappy little kitten would be the perfect first child for you both to raise.

Not super attached to it at first. Honestly he often gets frustrated while ship breaking the kitten but over time and with your help to learn how to understand its actions. He is almost as protective over that fluff ball as he is you.

Heres a secret follow the cat and you’ll find Zoro, any island any time follow the cat. It knows how to find him everytime

Zoro courting gifts may not be numerous but each of them had meaning and its clear to anyone just how much thought he puts into each one

THIS MAN RIGHT HERE-He’s an alpha, a broody secretly unsure alpha

Absolutely finds the concept of courting gifts to be blown out of proportion. Why are they spending thousands (or in Do Flamingos case Billions) of Berry’s on gifts that have little practical use.

He’s to methodical and detached sometimes for his own good. So his first few gifts to you may have actually been from Bepo/Schachi/Penguin…And boy was he mad.

After they explained they couldnt stand watching him pine without acting on it, and that he was disrespecting you as an alpha and as a Super Nova by not taking care of your courting needs at least. Law relents 

His gifts are never tacky, or wasteful though he is drawing a firm line from the start, the submarine is not a hoarding zone and he’s going to keep it that way and take care of you at the same time.

The first few gifts that are actually from him he hands to you himself “You need these for your nest ya?” 

Law put hours, upon hours of research into the best pillows to use for an omega nest. He wanted to ensure they’d support you properly and not cause any muscle or bone strain. Silly but endearing 

The blankets are thick fluffy and super soft, yes they have the Jolly Roger on it, or are the same pattern as his hat, but it is because he internally wants to lay a little bit of his claim on you even in a place he feels he can’t go (until you invite him, he respects your nest as sacred and has protected it from others even before this. No Penguin pranks allowed to your nest)

He is not hug on giving you his clothes, mainly because he feels he is working hard to supply you with nice clothes to wear and he can scent those (and you in the process) so why do you need his things?

This does not apply and goes right out the window when he’s feeling possessive.

He’s jealous by nature and hugely distrustful. Someone’s flirting with you? Suddenly his jacket is wrapped around your shoulder and he is GLARING. Or during soft cuddle times with him and Bepo he puts his jacket/blanket/hat on you and holds you close to his heart. Yes he likes to pretend you moved into him, but he does pull you in 

Other “practical gifts” are any book he thinks you’d enjoy. Literature (even to his own chagrin fantasy) is never a waste…not of Berries and not of space on the ship. 

He makes space on his bookshelf for you to have your own row, even if you are not a big reader it's just one of the ways he makes space for you in his life to show you he’s ready for you to be in it even more

If he wants to be a brat (of course it's to piss off Cap’n Kidd) he would then buy you flashy presents. Not too many just enough to tell the other Supernova to fuck off and that he knows you better because while they are baubles they still have practical use! And they are things you instantly love! He’s so smug about your happiness and just the biggest broody tsundere alpha mate. 

If you ever did want something not practical but didn’t ask him because you know his rule, he might relent on his decision if he is there at the time you see it. The look of longing on your face and how you are respecting his wishes and self-set guidelines…he might just buy it to surprise you. 

Leaving it on the pillow beside you when he gets up in the morning to go to work. He can't help it, he loves you 

[honey-minded-hivemind]

I imagine Gambit with a reader in one hand and a snakelet Rogue in the other. Poor guy probably has such conflicted feelings in regards to Rogue rn. On one hand, it's Rogue! On the other hand, snake... Like I don't think Gambit is afraid afraid, but you do not mess with snakes in the bayou. You wanna get bit? That's how you get bit, plus you have a solid chance of getting bit by something venomous. So Gambit has a healthy but distant respect for snakes.

The un-animalified adults are probably doing a roll call to make sure everyone else is accounted for. Keeping all the baby animals in sight so no one wanders off and gets mistaken for an actual animal by someone who wasn't present for the villain fight. OG Creed Reader has been the most vocal in their dislike of being stuck with the yans. Smilodon has the most escape attempts on record. And unexpectedly Cave Bear is causing the most mess. You ever see those videos of the Panda Keeper constantly trying to keep baby pandas out of mischief? That is Cave Bear right now. As for the villain...well they disappeared in the aftermath. But there have been sightings of a very small weasel in the mansion and people are trying to find out who they missed getting hit by the beam. Attempts to catch the lil guy have been unsuccessful so far.

Ahaha!

So cute!!

Gambit is being very gentle and very safety-minded holding and handling his beloved Rogue as a snake, especially since she is a venomous one, and he very much would like to keep his fingers and his life. Holding a Reader in one hand is hard, since they keep squirming and growling and crying, and even if he cuddles them and holds up treats or a bottle they won't bite.

The adults, seeing the chaos caused by their teens turned into animals, are trying to figure out how to change everyone back, while in the meantime they keep their kids safe, away from the outdoors, and somewhere that they can play and eat and nap and do whatever baby animals do.

(Watch Logan amd Storm take pictures, just watch them-)

The Readers make a very large mess, mostly because Cave Bear Cub Creed Reader is looking for snacks, napping in dangerous spots, amd trying to hide in places too big for bear cubs. Smilodon Cub Creer Reader is yowling and scratching and biting and being a menace, and Logan amd Hqnk have to try and sedate them, just so they can eat and take a nap and get a bath to rinse off any dirt or blood. And Lynx or Bobcat Kitten Creed Reader is trying to outrun the other baby animal teens, who are busy following them like a cuddly, eager pack of wolves or love-hungry amd cuddle-hungry beasts, who want to drag them into their new room (a spare room hastily turned into an enclosure for baby animals with the rambunctious chaos of teenagers).

Yeah. The Readers are in for it now...

[sweetchildcloud]

the fic ahead is SFW/NSFW(seriously don'tread if you don'tlike it) + 16 don't read if you're sensible and don't like this stuff

This is a bit more spicy🔥💙 (I'm a Gojo simp afterall 😗😏⚠️)

Cw:Gojo x reader, a lot of moaning,sfw/nsfw,couple stuff,neck biting/sucking,sexy movements😏,suggestive,inexperienced reader,fingering,teasing (Gojo), reader feels horny/needy,pet calling,swearing,sex(duh),encouraging to cum,cum teasting,snuggle after sex. 🚬❤🚬💙

Part 2 Featuring Gojo of my previous work that I did about neck biting.

||take a bite part.2|| written by me

Satoru notices you looking at his neck. You want to bite him; he knows it. He likes it. Your mouth waters as you think about feasting on his flesh, and he notices. He sees your gaze shifting between his neck and his eyes. Satoru’s breath hitches.

"Come on, why don't you feed on me?" He smirks, pushing against her cheek with his thumb. "I'm quite appetizing, you know."

"Sorry I.. uh..don't know what's happening to me" You said putting your hand over your mouth looking away blushing, in that very moment Gojo looked like a snack for you, you could feel your heart beating faster.

"You have nothing to be sorry for" Satoru says, stepping closer. He can feel the pounding of your heart. You're scared, but also intrigued. He notices you looking away but can't keep from admiring you. Your lips are soft and pink, and your eyes are like marbles. He stares at your neck, too and your skin reminds him of a juicy, ripe fruit.

Satoru bites his lip as you speak, trying not to laugh. He knows what he's doing is working. You're already moaning, and he hasn't even touched you yet. He moves closer, pressing his body against yours so that you can feel every inch. The sensation of his hard body against yours is intoxicating. He runs his hand to the back of your neck and pulls you close, licking your collarbone.

You moan softly in response as you bite his neck,nibbling on it like it was meat and you can't help escape a moan as you increase your work.

Satoru groans, closing his eyes and moving his forehead to the back of your neck. He's trying not to let out a moan, but your nibbling is too much for him. 'So fucking good,princess'

Your lips on his skin feel so good. He bites you back lightly while running his fingers through your hair. He digs his nails into your shoulder, marking his territory. He's possessive and wants everyone to know who you belong to. Your body feels warm.

You moan again as he pressed on your cervix with his finger and you couldn't help but bite him harder letting out a muffled moan. "Ahn..G..gojo" you said trembling alredy feeling wet.

Satoru's heartbeat picks up as he feels your teeth digging into his flesh. His breath quickens, and the sensation of your tongue against his neck sends tingles down his spine. He leans over to press himself against you while nibbling on your neck. His nose is tickling you, and his tongue is flicking against your ear. You can feel him getting harder as he presses up against you, pushing against your cervix, just playing with you like a kitten does with is prey.

"Are you ready to give in yet?" He asks, holding you tight. He can feel you getting wet just from his touch. He is in control, holding your body in his palm. You can't fight it; you want him to take you. He is the master of your flesh.

you nod as you moan anguished as he pushed his index in and you squeeze his shoulders tightly "G..go slow..p..please" you muttered under your breath as you looked at him,it was your first time in an healthy relationship afterall.

"I will angel~" Satoru replies, though it takes all his self-control not to push further. He doesn't want to hurt you. He wants you to enjoy your first time. So he eases into it, moving slowly, being gentle. You squeeze him tight, holding onto him like a lifeline. You're just learning to trust him, and he's just learning to trust you. Satorou wants to make this special, to make you feel safe and loved in his arms.

You moaned again at every push of his finger in your pussy and you bite his neck again in response.

"Ahnn...fuck angel..mhn you're so cute right now" Satoru whines softly and nibbles on your cheek. He moves his finger slowly, wanting to make you beg for more. Your bite drives him crazy, and he knows you're just trying to hold back. His tongue flicks against your neck, and his teeth graze your skin. He wants to mark you as his own; he wants you to be his.

"Ah ah mhn" you whimpered as wet and squelching sound filled the room,you were growing closer "ahn Gojo.." your legs were spread open the cum slowly dripping down as more were to come

"Good girl,moan for me princess" Satoru whispers, his breath hot against your neck. He moves his finger slightly faster, watching you squirm. He's getting more aggressive but not too rough; he knows your limits. He wants you to enjoy yourself.

Your cries are so delicious. He moves his other hand to your hip and squeezes, his nails digging into your skin. "Are you close?" He asks, his breath still hot on your neck. His finger is pushing deeper, faster. You're gripping him tight and biting his neck hard. Your moans grow louder, and he can't help but feel happy that you're enjoying this.

"Mhm mhm" You nodded squirming whimpering as you felt your own release building up.

"That's my good girl,you're mine" Satoru whispers, nibbling on your neck. His grip on you tightens, and you can feel his heartbeat in his fingers, rushing against you. You're so close; he feels you tense up in his arms.

"Ahnn... Ahnn..." You squirm in his arms, pushing against him. Your body melts into his, and he pulls you even closer, biting your neck again. His fingers are moving faster now, hitting the right spot.

"Come for me" Satoru whispers, pulling at your hips, his breathing becoming labored. He bites your neck harder, digging his nails in deeper in your thigth.

Your moans grow louder, and your body tenses up. You're on the brink. Satoru nibbles behind your ear, his voice going soft encouraging you "That's it princess mhn you can do it yes yes come come for me ahn" Gojo moaned out as he kept fingering you,he couldn't help but moaning with you.

You cry out as you finally reach your climax, clutching at Satoru's back. Your whole body is shaking, and your skin is covered in sweat. Satoru groans softly, letting your body fall limp in his arms. He kisses your forehead, his lips warm against your skin.

He pulls you close, your body still trembling against him. He whispers in your ear. "Good girl" he says, a smile on his face.

"You taste like heaven" Satoru whispers, licking his finger clean. He pulls you tight against him, kissing your neck. He doesn't want to let you go.

You snuggle up against him, his arms wrapped around you tightly. You're still shaking a little bit, but the feeling of his body against yours is so comforting. You finally feel safe in his arms. He kisses your neck, and your lips are still glistening from the saliva. You can't help but let out a small moan.

"You're so precious angel" Satoru whispers, pulling you close to him. He kisses your nose, your chin, your cheeks, your ear. Every spot feels tender, like you could explode at any moment. You're so sensitive, and every touch sends shivers down your spine. You cling to him tightly, desperate for his affection. His breath is warm in your face, and his hand strokes your hair gently.

Your breathing becomes shallow and slow. Your body relaxes in his arms, and your eyelids start to grow heavy. You're feeling so safe and comfortable. The world slows down, and all you can hear is his heartbeat. It feels like you can sink into him, melting into his body. You drift away, your mind at peace, your body sated and content.

--------------------------------------------------

That's all people,if I have to be sincere it's my first time writing smut and NSFW but I hope you liked it.

[nobodylikety]

OKAY LISTEN UP—

So I've been making some moodboards for Hybrid! New Jeans, I hope you like it! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡

Basically each moodboard has the things that the girls like the most, or rather, makes each of the girls herself < 🐻🐰🐈‍⬛🐶🦊 3

BEAR HYBRID! MINJI 🐻

Basically bear! minji core consists of:

Love for naps

Teddy bears (because obviously, she needs a little friend to sleep and cuddle with if you or Hybrid! New Jeans isn't available)

Hot chocolate with marshmallows, because something about the warmth of hot chocolate and the mushiness of marshmallows makes her sleepy! <3

Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. she's basically a big baby, so basic but yummy snacks are TOTALLY her thing.

Chocolate chip cookies. The combination of browned butter, caramelised sugar, vanilla and chocolate are "the rich flavours that mingle in a single snack", and Minji definetly LOVES IT. She finds these cookies irresistible, and she probably can't eat just one. 🍪

BUNNY HYBRID! HANNI🐰

Basically bunny! hanni core consists of:

Being wrapped in blankies for taking naps. Blankets are the best invention of mankind, according to Hanni. She loves to be wrapped up in them like a burrito and to sleep after a good scritches on her floppy ears and chin.

Cookies in the shape of a bunny. Although Haerin insists that it is somehow cannibalism, Hanni likes bunny-shaped or decorated cookies.

Strawberries. Bunnies like strawberries, and Hanni is no exception. Although she likes bread much better, strawberries are quite versatile and can be eaten in many ways, plus they are a healthy snack! So as long as it's bread or strawberries, Hanni's tummy is happy. 🐰🍓

Pink hoodies. Hanni likes oversized hoodies, the kind she's practically swimming in, but her biggest preference is pink! Pink is her favourite colour, so she's determined to make sure her wardrobe has it as much as possible.

(BLACK) CAT HYBRID! HAERIN 🐈‍⬛

Basically black cat! haerin core consists of:

A cute but bad bitch 🖤

Roll her eyes and make a grim face. If Haerin doesn't like you, every time she looks at you, it's going to feel like she's killing you with her eyes!

ps. Haerin's jealous gaze is especially deadly.

Kitten toe beans ALWAYS peeking out from under the sheets. Haerin is always hidden under the covers (always is a good time for a nap, or to isolate herself from society, or even both) and the only thing visible are her toe beans. ฅ ฅ

Sleeping in people's arms. She'll never admit it, but Haerin loves to sleep in your arms or Hybrid's! New Jeans. Then she'll wake up and start cursing, as usual, but deep down you know she enjoys those moments of napping in your arms.

PUPPY HYBRID! DANIELLE 🐶

Basically puppy! danielle core consists of:

Popcorn. not only tastes good, Dani LOVES that when it's time to eat them, her popcorn makes crunchy noises. crunchy stuff has her wagging her tail like crazy!

Stuffies with dumb designs and shapes! Dani has food-related soft and squishy plushies, such as a croissant, egg or bacon, to nibble on or throw at Hybrid! New Jeans every time she wants them to play with her <3 because puppies will chew whatever puppies want to chew 🐶

Crunchy bone-shaped treats. she doesn't even care if it tastes like vegetables or meat, or even if it tastes like a sock…because if it's bone-shaped, DANI WILL EAT IT.

Australian Shepherd Puppy. Because Dani is Australian, athletic and full of energy, just like Australian shepherds. Makes sense, doesn't it?

Puppy snout! Wherever Dani sees an open door or an opening, her adorable and curious snout will be there to take a peek. She has a habit of poking her head through your bedroom door and bark, or following you to the bathroom and poking her snout out of the half-jointed door.

FOX HYBRID! HYEIN 🦊

Basically fox! hyein core consists of:

Curling up by the fireplace.

What's better than a warm nap? The comforting crackle of the fire, the light but pleasant smell of wood burning slowly, the warmth, and being cuddled behind the ears until she falls asleep. honestly the best life <3

Apple slices with cinnamon. sometimes Hyein likes to brown them a bit in the fireplace, but most of the time she eats them only with cinnamon, because for some reason this kiddo is obsessed with cinnamon!

Rubbing her head against people's legs, asking to be pet. Hyein is rather like a clingy puppy in that respect, when she's in the mood for cuddling she just…*rubs head*.

Fruit-filled breakfasts and snacks, and preferably ones that look aesthetically pleasing! Hyein is attracted to things that have cute or funny shapes, which makes her more interested in eating them 🫐🍎🍓🍌⭐

Fox cuddly plush. She knows it's a bit of a cliché to have a fox as fave plushie, but can you blame her? it's super huggable!

Bonus!

OTTER HYBRID! HYEIN 🦦

Basically otter! hyein core consists of:

Cute and silly beanies! she has a whooole collection

Hybrid! New Jeans helps her put them on, they even try to put a different beanie on her every day <3

Cuddly toys and plushies! they are Hyein's favourite kind of thing. she has stuffed otters, for obvious reasons, but she also has a puppy, a fox, a bear and a stuffed kitten, because she loves to hold them close to her chest

FISH AS A SNACK, ALWAYS 🐟because although Hyein knows that otters feed not only on fish, but also on eels, she is a baby otter that's quite fussy and never wants to eat eel, never ever!

Pool + swimming goggles + floats = happy baby otter! 🦦🩵 Hyein loves swimming (otters are superbly adapted for swimming), but swimming in the pool is the safer option! Plus it's more fun, because unlike swimming in the river, the pool has floaties and swimming goggles, even water toys!

being carried in Hybrid! New Jeans arms. In her animal form, Hyein practically makes puppy eyes all the time to be carried! She flatly refuses to let her little paws touch the ground ♡

[verdemoun]

Wait wait wait please tell me more about Kieran and Javier timewarp plsplspls do they go on manfailure dates. Will they go on fishing trips. Does the timewarp vdl gang own a shitty little kayak like they deserve? Need to see Kieran and Javier being losers in love traversing modern times

THEY ARE MY ENDGAME because this is johnigail charthur era but i need my boys to find happiness.

kieran having been in modern era for 12 years when javier gets there. he may be a loser and also neurodivergent but he's so much more relaxed and confident than the gang ever got to see him be. grew his hair longer learned what a razor is and keeps his beard more even length even if his moustache is never more than like kitten whispers. healthy weight functional muscle from walking (drunk sprinting) and gardening like he's thriving

and javier's like having a rough time y'know he just wants to be around the gang all the time. he has felt so alone pretty much since the gang broke up and he's really ashamed of the fact he gave up his/Dutch's ideals and started working for the government for the sake of saving his own skin. and the general learning modern era stuff. most of the gang are busy with their lives though so kieran is accidentally the one who has to show him around?

javier has a type. and kieran very confidently taking his hand with a smile and saying they had to hold hands crossing the road? tall pasty manfailure with ratty dark hair? javier is panicked he is screaming oh no he's hot. it's a constant game of 'is he flirting or is he being socially dense' and javier is about to rip his hair out which kieran finds hilarious and adorable. its completely intentional. kieran is very honest, will fall in love with anyone he finds beautiful and thinks dad bod timewarped rdr1 javier is every bit as damned fine as rdr2 javier.

look they are disasters okay they're disasters in queer genderless human forms. javier went from still holding onto an on-and-off relationship with john pre-1899 that relied on codes and discretion not for being gay but because john was still trying to work things out with abigail (javier was so in love he just accepted being treated like that!!) to blushing at spontaneous pda because kieran glanced over and remembered how handsome his boyfriend is. getting told i love you seventeen times a day. doing something stupidly mundane only to hear 'pretty' from across the room and kieran just watching with the goofiest in love smile on his face. not only how flustered javier gets but also has he ever been in a relationship where he was loved as much as he loved someone? trying not to cry as he catches his semi-verbal boyfriend practising spanish so they can talk in javier's first language because NO ONE IN THE GANG EVER TRIED TO LEARN SPANISH EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T SPEAK A WORD OF ENGLISH WHEN HE MET THEM

javier's loyalty also meaning he is the biggest advocate for anything kieran needs to support his neurodivergency?? using the famous 'make grown men piss themselves' glare before staff can even comment on kieran bringing his snacks to a fancy tapas place on date night. also knowing exactly what makes safe foods safe and being able to offer mouthfuls of new foods that kieran might like or very honestly say 'do not touch you will be physically disgusted by this'. both considering a perfect romantic evening fishing. just quietly fishing lost in sharing tips and bait and the total bliss of one another's company. couple pic looks like american gothic with both of them completely blank and holding fish. nestled on the couch watching tv in spanish because kieran has his headphones on and doesn't listen anyway but really enjoys it. javier replacing the weighted blanket. kieran being taller and just picking javier up if something his brain detects as a threat happens because protect loved one comes first and javier trying trying to assure him the small yappy dog is not a threat to their lives but also almost tearing up because imagine someone loving him enough to actively try and keep him safe

it started ironic but their song is literally fish by craig campbell and javier will sing it while playing guitar despite neither one of them particularly enjoying country music but loving that song. the gang are mortified and see kieran as an innocent soft bean of purity who doesn't understand the song is not about fishing. not only is he fully aware but that is exactly why it is their song. trust they have the best sex life in timewarp. just losers with trauma and seperation anxiety who are completely devoted to each other, actually listen to one another so sincerely and never have to be worried about being left behind or forgotten again

to the second point annabelle being the big cheese wealthy woman of the group bought hosea a very modest aluminum boat with a low power engine because he's getting too old for rowing and she knows he does enjoy fishing. john will not touch it with a 10 foot pole he is convinced it is going to sink at any second when someone is reeling in a fish all other passengers have to move to the other side for balance and despite opportunities to buy significant better ocean vessels hosea loves the ss old girl. they can pry his shitty boat from his cold dead hands. so many happy, good, new memories he's formed with the gang in post time-warp.

[warrior-cats-rewritten]

do the cats have any like. things with bugs? like symbolism or stories?

Ants - Ants, due to their strength in numbers, are seen as very good friends and an example as to why working in teams in a good thing. A single ant can hardly move anything, but an entire team of ants can move huge pieces of food! The Ant- prefix is supposed to inspire the thought of a cat who is a team player, someone who works well with others. The ancient cat Antcloud of Riverclan, Cloudberry's brother, was known as a friendly cat to all. Antpelt's mother named him Antkit in hopes he'd make lots of friends...

Ladybugs - These little critters are actually associated heavily with motherhood! It is said that if a pregnant Queen sees a ladybug with many spots, the queen will have many kittens! If the ladybug does not have many spots, they will not have many kittens. Superstitious cats believe in it, like Brightheart, where cats who don't, like Cloudtail, tend to just think they're pretty. Ladybug is a very, very rare prefix, seen in ancient times with an underaged Shadowclan apprentice, Ladybugpaw. He is demoted back to Ladybugkit, and his future name was Ladybugfur.

Praying Mantis - These tough bugs (seriously I'm pretty sure fear is a foreign concept to these things) are seen pretty differently by each Clan. To Shadowclan, they are a snack, albeit a more bizarre one, often paired with roasted poultry and spicy Juniper berries. To Riverclan, they're a sign that the meadow in their Lake territory is healthy! Before that, they were mysterious, seen more like spirits than anything, and a sign that Starclan was watching the land by bringing its grass blades to life. To Windclan, they are valued for their resilience, and their willingness to battle despite size... It's relatable to them! If Windclan had movies, they'd be the underdog hero.

Grasshoppers - Snacks! Food! Yummy! Favorite food of Featherpelt, who loves frying some up and dipping them in blood gravy. Oh yeah... We use cooking too, but MUCH more recent in Clan history! Riverclan turns up their noses though, they refuse to eat them, but Shadowclan cats will slather them in vinegar. Grasshopper in general are associated with an old story, one that only Skyclan knows now from their old days. Their very first leader learned how to jump from a large Grasshopper, but when it tried to take her place as leader of Skyclan, she jumped high and swatted it off the high branch, breaking it into lots of little Grasshopper babies. Grasshoppers now have no idea what happened, but catching them is still a point of pride!

Snails (I know they're not bugs but you try telling cats that) - Snails! Their shells are collectible, and sometimes a very hot commodity in Shadowclan and Skyclan! There are stories of giant snails that cats can ride the shells of, and paint with pigments, meaning little painted shells are worth even MORE. The name Snail is meant to inspire peace and thoughtfulness.

Clams/Muscles - Riverclan food! Lots of Riverclan Cats learn to dive down into the river and part of the ocean when they take trips down there, all with the hopes to grab some yummy creature (and hopefully find a pearl!). Cats guard the ones they catch, and they're heavily prized for the possibility that they may hold a pearl. There are Legends about hunting parties that managed to save Riverclan from starting to death by diving down into the depths of the river to grab lots of them. Part of Riverclan mythology is the legend of a gigantic clam that resides in the river that an ancient Leopardclan warrior stashed a giant rainbow coloured pearl inside of to guard...

Crabs (also yes I know) - Beach bugs! A very lovely treat that cats will go to Sundrown Place to get along with salt! Just make sure to bring a basket, so you don't get pinched! Berrynose finds this one out the hard way. They're a delightful food and they're shells and pincers are often kept and traded! Riverclan has now become the lovers of all seafood, and will trade you whatever you like in return for a big crab.

Flies - Flighty around others, but brave enough to withstand sickness, often mate with those huge roaring dragons in the sky! Helpful as well, they point out sick prey or rotting meat. Cherryfall named Flykit the way she did because she feels that they're incredibly important, and wanted her tiny daughter to feel special. Flystar of Skyclan was Honor Titled the name Fly- for their ability to pick our bad prey, saving the Clan from a major outbreak during a very dark time when every other Clan was experiencing a Plague.

Dragonflies - Seen as the gorgeous offspring between flies and Dragons (airplanes) due to their shape, they're associated with grace, beauty, still water, and growing plants. There are however, stories of Dragonflies managing to become massive beasts, joining their dragon parent in the sky... Dragonfly from the Kin gets a huge reputation boost for being cool because of it.

Beetles - Icewing's favorite creature, if you let her, she'll talk your ear off about how pretty they are, their lovely smooth shells, how much she loves the ones with horns... All that. They are seen as very beautiful by the Clans, and I'm pretty sure some apprentices keep beetles in little hideouts to watch them... Or make the horned ones fight because kids will be kids. Icewing and Mintwhisker were big fans of beetle fights, and named Beetlewhisker after the beetles they bonded over as apprentices.

Worms - Lot of different opinions! Though, Thunderclan has a very very sore spot concerning worms. You'll have to forgive them, they're not the type to let things go. Since the move to the lake, things have gotten better, but stories about The Great Hunger are still cause for many cats to very much dislike worms. They'll happily trade them off to Riverclan. Bait in exchange for duck feathers and the occasional egg.

Speaking of, Riverclan LOVE worms. Not to eat, no, but for bait! Not many fish can resist a wiggly worm!

To Windclan, they're kinda seen as annoying. I'm borrowing Tunnelbuns from Bonefall, and a worm getting into your tunnelbun is the WORST.

For Shadowclan, many apprentices try and catch them to put them in frog-filled areas to fatten up frogs for an easier future catch. Doesn't always work, but it keeps them entertained and it's fun to watch!

Crickets - The snack you dare your friends to try. Cool! Weird! A bug that SINGS! Myths linger about a cricket that managed to learn to speak, and gave a sign from Starclan to an old Lionclan cat to save his leader. Cricket songs are enjoyed heavily, and Crickets going quiet is cause for deep concern. It happens right before the Great Battle. The silence is still a... Tough to talk about moment.

Spiders - Skyclan and The Forest Four have very different views!

To the Forest Four, Spiders have a bit of a tough rep. They're eeire, but the cobwebs they make are so, so useful. Plenty of cats have a fear of spiders, such as Cloudtail, Owlwhisker, and Mossyfoot. They're seen as very pragmatic, and Spiderleg was named for his very spider-y body, but also his will to live, and his strength, especially when he was a tiny kitten, and needed his extra leg amputated due to the pain it was causing.

To Skyclan: A tragic symbol of the final leader of old Skyclan. Spiderstar made the final call, like a dying mother spider, to cast off remaining cats of Skyclan out into the Twolegplace. They are seen as beautiful, intelligent, and protective. Spiderstar is often called upon for a blessing when a cat goes on a quest, in hopes they will still come home afterwards. Pebbleshine frequently prays to her, as does Violetshine. They both love spiders as a result.

Ticks - Bad! Awful! Makes cats sick! Hurts and itches! These things caused a terrible Plague during the Homebrew story Wishstar's Abyss, and she used the cover of the sickness to poison the current leader. They need to be dealt with ASAP. Removed with prey bones or carved sticks, mouse bile is a Shadowclan exclusive seasoning once cooking is discovered.

Bees - Seen as less of a threat than their Wasp counterparts, but still creatures to be a bit weary about! They do not take kindly to stealing. The Legend of The Bee is very similar to the old myth in our world about them! A large bee presented Starclan with sweet honey, and Starclan was thankful. When Starclan asked the bee how she managed to make enough to share with everyone, the bee laughed and stated she would attack anyone who tried, that Starclan cats were lucky to have gotten a taste. Starclan cursed the bee, while she was given an incredible weapon to defend herself, it would kill her if used. Since you're able to harvest from bees without getting stung (so long as you remain calm) the Bee name is often associated with quieter, more strategic cats.

Bumblebees - These are seen as SIMILAR to bees, but not quite! They do still sting, but how could something so differently shaped and so very fuzzy be the actual same thing? They're also called Bumbles, making Bumble a suitable prefix (not that it wasn't already from Bumblestripe!) Shadowclan celebrates a Bumblebee Festival, where many Pollen rich flowers are gathered and placed in the middle of camp to attract bumbles near the end of Greenleaf!

Wasps/Hornets - These are actually seen as the same thing! Just different ranking. Since it's known that bees swarm, the Clan cats see these as higher ranked bees. Think apprentices vs warriors. Same THING, different rank. Waspwhisker's name is an indication of his strength in battle (and in being a good tracker, hence the suffix).

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Whirlwind

Epilogue for Sweet Treats AU: by character | chronological | epilogues

Warnings: these drabbles will include dark elements such as noncon, control, intimidation violence,, and other stuff that may not be specified. Take this as you chance to scroll by.

Please let me know what you think <3

🍯🍯🍯

It’s the most peace you’ve had in some time. You suspect the same of the woman beside you, the quiet figure hovering the jigsaw piece over the table before attempting to connect it to one of the connected patches. Without success, she moves on to another piece, trying to fill in the corner closest to her.

You work at putting together the image of a crow, one of several pictured in the puzzle. A rather morbid subject. A murder of scavengers against grey sky. It adds to the difficulty of the jigsaw that the pieces hardly vary in their hue. You’re happy for it, it keeps you busy.

Muffin stops and lays her hands flat. She lifts them slowly to signal her frustration in a deliberate gesture. ‘This is too hard! Should be kittens or puppies.’

You laugh and shake your head. “Yeah, well, I asked for a puzzle, didn’t exactly get to choose it.”

‘Typical,’ she signs and crosses her arms.

You sense her restlessness. While you might find calm in the dull hobby, it only seems to set her on edge. Maybe you could take her outside to explore the yard. It’s a bit snowy but nothing intractable. 

“How about a snack? You hungry?”

She looks at you with hopeful eyes and smiles. She gives an enthused nod. You push yourself to your feet and stretch out the cramp in your calf. You had your foot hooked so tight behind the other, you didn’t realise how it constantly tugged on your tendon.

“I might have some of the meringues left, oh, I could make tea, or some cocoa too?”

She tells you in her way that whatever you have is fine. You think to ask her to come with you but suppose she might want a break. Even from you. She’s been a bit flighty for much of the day.

You head down to the kitchen and put on the kettle. You take out the jar of white hot chocolate mix you made from scratch. You’re not too keen on the sweeter concoction but you have to make use of it. Muffin seems the type.

You wait for the boil, the slow building rumble fills the kitchen. You pause as you swear you hear something else. You look up but shrug. This house is so big you can’t help but manufacture ghosts in every corner.

You fill a plate with meringues and a few jelly cookies leftover from your latest bout of fastidiousness. You stir the chocolate into the water and add a healthy dose of milk to cool and add some thickness to it. You find a tray from the cupboards and lay it all out in a delicate balance before lifting it all.

The stairs are a tedious climb as you focus on not spilling a drop or crumb. You come up to the top floor and continue down the hall.

“I hope you like–”

Your voice dies as you enter the room. Muffin squeaks as she’s pinned to the table on her back, Thor’s hand on her chest as he bends over her, snarling in her face. She squirms as she claws at his thick arm.

The tray rattles in your hands and you quickly set it onto the console table beside the door. You don’t think, even as a mug bobbles perilously. You rush forward as Muffin’s frightened eyes are drawn by your approach. Thor is fully entranced in his intimidation.

“Hey, get off her!”

You latch onto his thick arm and try to pull him away. Your middle presses to the edge of the table, shifting a few pieces as you struggle with him. He growls and tries to elbow you off of him. You cling to him and lean your weight back, knowing you can hardly compete with his godly strength.

He turns and flings you off. You’re stunned, even as you know how strong he is, at the sheer force of it. You stumble back on your heels and your ankles bend as you flail helplessly. You tip and fall back, unable to stop your sudden descent.

Crack! Your head bounces off something hard. It’s only as you sprawl across the floor and the lamp on the short shelf teeters above you that you realise what it is. You garble senselessly and reach to touch your skull. Your arm moves out of tandem with your mind and you can only groan and hide beneath it. 

Your eyes roll back as you writhe on the floor. You hear Thor’s growl and the scrape of the table legs against the floor. You ramble without meaning, the world tilting and spinning beyond the shield of your eyelids.

There’s a clamour of footsteps and a hiss, “what’ve you done, brother?”

“She should not accost a king, even if she is your wife,” Thor’s words skew in your ears as your arm slips away and you blink, trying to push through the fog.

“You brute!” Loki snarls, “you will leave my home at once.”

A hazy blur looms over you and warmth rests on your arm, another on your head. The hand on your forehead is too small to be Loki’s. It does not linger long as it is jarred away by another shadow and a thunderish growl.

“Darling,” Loki’s voice wafts through the rising obscurity, “relax,” he touches your temple, a coolness spreading from his touch, “sleep.”

[salternateunreality2]

Claudia has a pet dragon AU

cute ideas that @strayheartless and I chatted about <3

Claudia probably had a pet dragon at some point that still visits and bothers her for snacks

Dragon: *tail wagging, dancing around, breathing fire* Claudia: *shoves its nose away* go on, git, I ain't got nothin more for ya, you ate all my wolf liver!

Dragon: *rolls on its back asking for belly rubs*

Claudia: ugh, fine. *Delivers belly rubs* Go on, ya daft dragon, I'm taking Cloud to school!

The villagers: ...

-----------

Claudia and her dragon had their babies around the same time, and babysat for each other.

Claudia and Dragon Mama exchange snacks occasionally; Claudia brings special parts of her kills that she and Cloud shouldn't eat, and Dragon Mama sometimes drops off whole carcasses.

Dragon: this deer ain't worth my time, but I killed it and Claudia might give me wolf liver if I drop by!

-----------

Mama Dragon is named Asil, and Baby Dragon is named Knarf. Because backwards, that's Lisa Frank, and they look like Lisa Frank characters. And they're scratch-n-sniff.

-----------

AGSZC visit Nibelheim and AGSZ are panicked when Cloud hears a dragon in the distance and runs off to confront it...only to discover Cloud GIGGLING and play-fighting it. They are more concerned about the giggling, as they've never heard it before.

They expected the Steve Irwin vibes from Zack, who has a pet sahagin in Gongaga, but Cloud was a surprise (he shouldn't have been, he's feral AF).

--

AGSZC: *walking to Nibelheim*

Dragon: ROAR

Angeal: We'd better steer clear, right Cloud? Cloud?! CLOUD!!!

Zack: Where did he even go?! That was so fast!

Sephiroth: Towards the dragon.

Genesis: Of fucking course.

AGSZ: *runs up just in time to see cloud, unarmed, jump on a dragon*

Cloud: KNARF YOU FUCKER I GOT YOU FIRST WAIT NO NOT THE FACE NOT THE FACE HAHAHAHAHAHAHA GET OFF

--

The dragons immediately like Zack because all animals immediately like Zack.

Angeal wins them over through snacks.

And they're obsessed with Genesis' sword and materia, and Sephiroth's hair.

They keep Sitting On Sephiroth and grooming his hair or staring at it, and they keep trying to steal Gen's stuff. You wouldn't think a puppy-lizard-cat is very sneaky when it's the size of a house, but clearly you would be wrong

--

Sephiroth: Please, Miss, I don't know how dragon saliva affects hair, and I can't afford for it to go spiky like Cloud's.

Asil: *still sitting on him and licking*

--

(turns out it's really really good for hair and makes it thick, shiny, and healthy...after you wash out the top layer of slime)

Knarf and Asil leave Genesis gifts when they steal from him. Sometimes it's worthless crap like a leaf or a rodent carcass; sometimes it's sparkling gems, rare materia, or their own scales, which are hard to come by. There is no pattern.

Genesis tries to bargain with them, bringing an assortment of Wall Market jewelry.

--

Genesis: Shall we trade? What will you give me for this diamond necklace?

Knarf: *holds up a leaf*

Genesis: How about this fake ruby bracelet?

Knarf: *5 rare materia*

Genesis: Ok, then you must give me something great for this fake ruby necklace, which only differs from the bracelet in that it is longer...

Knarf: *dead skunk plops on Genesis' head*

--

Talking about their childhoods:

--

Sephiroth: My sperm donor would order me to kill kittens.

Genesis: My parents didn't care, but my nanny would hit me with a ruler.

Zack: I'd be sent out into the backwoods to work off my energy and made friends with monsters!

Cloud: I'd go to air jail, where Asil would pick me up by my shirt and dangle me in the air.

Angeal: MY MOTHER SENT ME TO TIME OUT WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR CHILDHOODS

--

Air jail:

I'd like to think that Sephy starts to have his breakdown, Claudia hears about it and the mysterious head in the reactor, and then sends the boys to help Seph while she and Asil take care of Jenova.

Asil both sits on Jenova and incinerates her, while Claudia shoots Jenova with her biggest shotgun.

[kaeyx]

I will In fact fuck the old men, I'll elaborate on the cat au since everyone's talking about how cute catzai is but no one is ready for catzawa or catmori. I think when you let them in (cuz even irl kittens are more liked than older cats) and they're just so greatfull and attached to you. They sneak up into your bed at night seeking your company and you're actually worried your bed will give up (cuz let's be honest those small beds for one person won't hold up 3 grown people) and so you move to the bed thinking that they just want to feel comfortable and warm but the moment they notice you're not in the bed they instead snuggle up against you on a floor and now the bed's empty instead..and if you thought catzai throwing himself on you was bad try holding up weight of two tall ass men purring into your ear. Catmori is Smart,very smart but he'll pretend to be silly just for your own amusement he thinks if he can make you laugh more and show you more affection you'll like him more than catfukuzawa. While Catfukuzawa is like a Guard (dog)cat and strong one at that) making sure you ate, fighting Mori for the spot on your lap and making sure you're safe. Also when fighting for who gets to be in your lap (since there's no way you can hold up both of these grown ass men at the same time) catmori does the cat thing when he hits catzawa on the head with his paw/hand two time and hisses his ears pulled back and catzawa just stares at him unmoved. (He won't move. He refuses to move. He doesn't care he already passes the agreed time on your lap and now it's Mori's turn) Catzawa makes sure you eat healthy while catmori would just love to spoil you with sweets and your favourite food. They're so cute I love em

It is your god given right to fuck those old men indeed. I feel like they'd be hesitant at first because it's just really uncommon for anyone to take them in at their age, let alone both of them together. But they'll warm up to you soon enough, they're both smart enough to sense you're serious about this arrangement.

I love the thought of catzawa being stoic all the time except for maybe a smug little flick of the ears or his purring. He'd drape himself elegantly over your shoulders while you work or sit pressed up against your side, just enjoying the quiet company. He watches over you from the counters and the windows and the rooftops and you can't tell him off because he'll just stare right back at you until you give up.

Catmori might act all dignified around people he doesn't know, but you're different. Catzawa too of course. He'll bonk his head against you in greeting or bring you sweets and rub his scent all over your clothes. Catzawa looks on from the corner if you give him too much attention, tail swishing. Catmori would love to curl his tail around you or put his arms around your shoulders or waist, paws kneading at your hip while he chills and thinks about something else or watches TV. He's the one always tempting you to get a snack or try that new boba place that just opened up, while catzawa is the one sternly steering both of you away and asking when you last cooked yourself a proper meal.

[moonlight-tmd]

Prowlbee.

They have been chosen by the cat distribution system.

It's night, and they go to Prowl's room to cuddle and find a random cat that decided it lives there now.

Oh yah. I can see them just going out on a date and the base being so quiet one would think it's empty.

Then they come back and Bee decided to go ahead and prepare the berth for cuddles while Prowl brings the snacks. He comes in and sees something orange skidaddle under Prowl's berth. He comes closer and omg it's a kittyh-

Prowl comes in and Bee hushes him from any questions and excitedly waves him over to look. Prowl loves animals so he has an entire animal food stash in his cabinet to he can feed them when he goes out. He lured the cat out with a can of food, also gave it water to drink.

The kitty was an orange tabby, it looked like it was one of the street cat considering how dirty it was and neither of them cound sense a chip in it.

After a while of eating the cat got skittish and ran up the shelf and out the window- presumably the way it got inside in the first place. They were sad and hoped the cat would come back later.

Both of the got woken up by meowing the next day. It was the same cat, sitting near Prowl's berth and meowing loudly. Prowl noticed the can of salmon feed he gave to the cat was now completely empty, meaning the cat ate the rest and was now demanding more food.

He got up and gave it another canned feed along with fresh water. The cat ate it right up and stayed just a little longer before deciding to go away.

Bee got the idea of trying to name the cat- since it apparently didn't have a home therefore no name. He gave few suggestions and had a bit of an argument with Prowl- Bee wanted to name the cat something silly like "Gatorade" or "Greg the Devourer" while Prowl was more into traditional names like "Daisy" or "Jasper".They settled on naming the cat "Honeycomb".

The cat had visited few more times and each time it was more friendly with them. At one point Prowl even set up a little area for it to hang out at- few scratchers, boxes and bowls to eat and drink.

They told the others about the cat and they were so jealous- while they have seen the cat few times, it only ever came close to either Bee or Prowl. At this point the cat had decided to stay at the little cat castle in Prowl's room.

The cat seemed more affectionate with time, it even came up to brush against or cuddle with them. It was amazing. It also seemed the cat was starting to get more healthy as well because it seemed to get fatter.

One day however the cat didn't show up, they looked for it everywhere around and inside the plant but nothing. It didn't show up the day after either...

But then the next morning when they woke up Bee heard very quiet tiny meows coming from one of the boxes in the cat area.

They checked and there was Honeycomb laying in the blankets, nursing a fresh batch of kittens. There was 4 in total, all of them had orange fur with a bit of white.

They took the mama and the kittens to the vet to get checked out; the kittens were fine but the mama needed some meds for the parasites and fleas. They got her clean and chipped before taking her and the kittens back to base.

Sari was over the moon when she saw the kittens. Honeycomb was surprisingly chill with everyone else which made them happy. Bee and Prowl decided to give the kittens up for adoption after they were a month old. Honeycomb herself got a collar and a tag and has become the team's family pet, although she favorited Bee and Prowl.

They both taught her tricks like jumping onto their shoulders to ride. She also made herself useful by bringing dead rats she hunted down to them- the little rascals had been biting thru cables at the plant and Ratchet was running out of options on how to get rid of the persistent rodents.

[honey-minded-hivemind]

Lil late to the party but I could totally see "Kevin" being Rewind Reader's babysitter in the Static au. Gives Morph the chance to get a closer look at Reader and their shrunken form, plus it's an easy excuse to "get to know" Reader's current caretakers.

"Kevin" is their new babysitter! They're a fun, likeable, sweet person, who's ready to dedicate all their love and attention to such a swell kid~!

(And keep an eye on their scummy parents, they mean, seriously, who let them keep their kid?! An IDIOT, a SADIST, some JERK, that's who!)

They're making breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks for this poor underfed kid (they hardly eat anything- something's wrong-), they're playing games with them (they like board games and puzzles, but get scared during hide-and-seek), and they help clean this little bundle of love (their hair is a mess- but they'll untangle it and give it a good wash! Oh, their poor nails, they look broken and jagged-! Are those ScArS on them-?!)!

"Kevin" quickly becomes Reader's only friend parent and the only person who's shown them positive and healthy relationships and ways to behave. Kevin is heartbroken at the fact such a sweet, sunshine kitten of a kid would be so lonely amd sad and stuck with their awful parents. They really really don't know what to do...

But then when they and Reader are drawing together, they notice a certain character that Reader has no way to know exists. How could they... Who did... Sunshine, who is that?

"Oh, this is G- J- ... hmmm... Genet! They're a cat hero person!"

And now Kevin is looking closer, and notices how bright caramel, how wide those eyes of Reader's are... How their nails are a little sharp, but seem ti end up broken... How they look exactly like- like-

A little version of Genet...

They're trying not to cry, or freak out, but their kit-cat notices they don't feel good and is already hugging them eith their little arms, apologizing for making them sad-

No, no, kit-cat, don't apologize, this isn't your fault- it could never be your fault-

That night, they're talking with their team, telling them they think they've found Genet... amd that the kid they're helping? They're pretty sure that's Genet...

The team changes their plan, telling them they're going to have to become more involved, they need to start meeting their kid, they need to start rebonding, so when they can-

They can bring then home...

[sickiehugs]

ranpo hcs?? :)) PLEASEPEASLPEPSPELSPESPLELPLPESLPASFLPASPELPSLESPLESALPAESLP

OKAY OKAY 😭😭😭😭

Ranpo sickfic HCs!

I can imagine him getting really cold and complaining about it all day ("It's cold in hereee!" "Who turned on the AC?" "Why is it so cooold..."), but no one else is cold so they catch on pretty quickly.

In denying that he's sick, he might claim that he used Ultra Deduction and it said that he was fine and perfectly healthy. No one buys that, of course.

Fukuzawa (Dadkuzawa) has to step in eventually. He probably wouldn't trust Ranpo to take proper care of himself if he were to send him home, he'd probably just eat snacks all day until he passes out. So Ranpo hangs out in Fukuzawa's office with a blanket wrapped around him (Yosano is busy, for Plot Convenience™).

He complains a lot, saying it's too cold or too hot or he's bored or hungry or something hurts... Fukuzawa is really worried at first and would give him whatever he wants, but it eventually just becomes background noise in his head; Ranpo will complain no matter what he does, the only thing that will temporarily shut him up is some praise, like "You're doing well," or "Yeah, but I know you're strong enough to handle it."

The real worrying happens when Ranpo suddenly goes completely silent. Fukuzawa looks up from his desk and Ranpo is just curled up into the tightest little ball he's ever seen under that blanket, shivering like a wet kitten with his eyes shut tight and his cheeks all red. Fukuzawa goes soft again, and decides to just call it a day with work and just take Ranpo home with him so he can get some real rest and some actually nutritious food.

BONUS:

His sneezes are really quiet and high-pitched; Dazai would tease that he sounds like a girl.

He might get frustrated with how his fever-ridden brain can't compute as much as it normally could. His genius is slightly impaired temporarily, he's just a little silly right now.

He's surprisingly easy to carry, he would kinda just melt into your arms and go limp like a little ragdoll.

[sushiburritonoms]

New ETN/GT Fic

I wrote this for Matpat's retirement in March and look at me, right on time as always.

Matthew Patrick's Home for Imaginary Friends and Biblical Abominations

Rating: Gen, no ships, comedy, could be considered crack I guess

Summary: Stephanie Patrick has made a lot of adjustments and sacrifices ever since her husband came back from Everlock and has come out of the other side a stronger person. But six years later, Matthew and Nikita finally achieve the impossible and bring Joey Graceffa back from Pandora’s Box...along with something else. What do you do when your husband accidentally releases the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse?

You hire them for Youtube of course.

Basically a fusion of Game Theory lore and ETN, featuring Stephanie, Jason, Tom, Lee, Santi, Amy, Mirror Matt, Ash, and a ton of other Theorist cameos and easter eggs. Its the new channel hosts as the Four Horsemen; this will NOT make sense if you don't follow the Theorist channels.

Fic Snippet is below the cut.

Hey Death, whatcha doing?”

“Go away, Fam, I’m busy!”

“You’re busy in MY space! Aren’t you supposed to be off reaping innocent babies or kittens or something?!”

“For the last time, we are GUESTS; you don’t own the space, you glutinous half-wit! Leave me alone!”

“Matt! Matt, Death is messing with your kitchen!!”

“GUYS! I’M ON THE PHONE!”

Stepping into her own kitchen wasn’t supposed to feel like a SAE mission. But Steph kept a flask of holy water and a crucifix in her Lululemon hip bag as she made her way over from the stairwell. The moment she made her presence known, she saw sickly green flames brighten to life in the blank sockets of Death’s skull face.

“Ah! Stephanie! So good of you to join us.” Death nodded his head politely and lifted a skeletal hand to tug at his black hood as though it were some sort of dapper hat. His upper-class London accent made the act feel less ridiculous and more like proper gentleman behavior.

“…Hi.” Steph was never going to get used to how terrifying it was to see green fire instead of eyeballs, especially since Death towered several feet over her and Matthew. Speaking of which… “I thought I heard Matthew’s voice.”

“He went downstairs,” a smooth voice chimed in from behind Death’s black robe. “With the other dude and the chick.”

Death snorted. “Eloquent and informative as ever.”

“She knows who I’m talking about! Now move your nonexistent ass; some of us are trying to work here!”

Steph saw a thick human arm swat at Death’s cloak, and the living personification of Famine stepped into Steph’s view.

Famine grinned at her with a very normal and healthy-looking human male face. Thank God. She would take his human form any day over the emaciated, decayed corpse that was his true form. Today, he was favoring a physique that had very broad shoulders and thick muscular biceps that strained against a baby blue shirt with some anime character imprinted on it. Matthew would surely know the show, but she did not. He had a round tan face with a salt and pepper beard and very mischievous eyes that were partially hidden behind thick black glasses. He eagerly held out one of her mixing bowls, which was filled near to the brim with something that smelled utterly delicious.

“I’m making snacks!”

“Thank you, Famine. That’s very sweet of you.” Steph couldn’t help but break into a smile. “Is this the same body you wore yesterday?”

Famine nodded vigorously. “Matt said we need to pick a body and stick with it. I like this one. Check out my GUNS!” He set the bowl down on the countertop beside him and flexed one of his thick arms at Steph.

Death scoffed. “Flesh is weak. Entropy is inevitable.”

“You’re just jealous because you can’t create anything other than the same lameo body you’ve had for centuries.”

“There’s nothing wrong with the way my human form looks. Not all of us are vain like you and Pestilence.”

“Excuse you?”

Steph jumped. A small, slender woman with incredibly pale skin and long black hair suddenly sat cross-legged at one of Steph’s kitchen bar chairs. She wore a shoulderless black halter dress that went down to the floor, to where Steph could see the tips of shiny Doc Martens peeking out. On her face, she wore black eyeliner to outline her light blue eyes, which were intensely focused on Famine. She looked completely human except for one small detail. She had long, razor-sharp silver claws instead of nails resting elegantly in her lap, like ten slim stiletto daggers just waiting to be thrown.

Death shook his bony head. “How many times have I told you not to scare our hosts like that? Don’t make me put a bell around your tiny neck!”

“Hmm, I’d like to see you try,” Pestilence yawned into the palm of her hand, her claws flexing across her face. They were filed into sharp points and caught the light in a terrifying way. “Sorry to bother you, Steph, but Matt was looking for you and said you needed to be on his call. He’s with the Vessel and Nikita.”

“The dude and the chick!” Famine shrugged. “I said that already.”

“You are useless,” Death groaned.

Oh. Right. Matthew had said he was going to call Jason today. She’d completely forgotten that was happening.

You can continue the fic here