#healthcare experiences

[stuckinapril]

omg i’m premed too! But my dad got in a car accident and there were no attending orthopedic surgeons available so a resident put my dads leg back together with I think like 80-90 percent accuracy? So my dads leg has a bit of a tilt to it but still really good! Only reason a resident had to do it though is because the hospital thought my dad didn’t have insurance so they delayed his surgery for over 4 hours after he was admitted

OMGG fellow pre med hiii!!! are you a bio major?? what year are you?? are u taking a gap year. when are u taking the mcat. i love u. that story about your dad is crazy

[inkskinned]

you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.

(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)

but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.

(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)

there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.

(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)

you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.

(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)

you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.

in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.

but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.

they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.

it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.

[balkanradfem]

I've managed to curate my small misogyny-free space both online and in real life, and now I'm no longer used to misogyny, it's no longer normal to me. So when I accidentally glimpse it, I'm not desensitized to it, I'm always shocked and unbelieving.

If I notice a m*n talking about a woman like she's 'just some ***' I'm immediately aware that this is in fact a demonic creature who needs to be burned. If I see anyone using a slur against women or pretending women are at fault for any of the world's issues, the hair on my neck stands up at the unbelievable amount of hatred.

Anyone implying that women should be in any way controlled, punished, forced to do anything against their will or dedicate their lives to anyone but themselves, is preposterous and villainous to me, I'm at loss that someone could even think that way about a half of the human population who are creators and administrators of life.

I know I am in a bubble, but it feels different knowing deeply in your heart that all of this is not normal, that casual or normalized hatred against women is absolutely insane, that it's sharp and painful and dehumanizing at every turn. It's insane to realize that women just have to live like this, believing all of that is normal, that I once lived like this, wondering what was wrong with me and why I couldn't just be what everyone was expecting me to.

I think still, if I can make a small space without this hate present in it, without anyone or anything implying we should be anything but free, anything but full complete human beings with absolute control over our lives, then we can strengthen and grow these spaces, and get more women in, have more women experience what life is like when hatred is removed. There is hope for women.

[isbergillustration]

Apropos Sad Wet Scandinavian Zombies;

[mayashwood]

TW: Gross surgery/medical stuff.

I've always been the wrong kind of trans woman you know? Like, I'm a pervert, I'm profoundly mentally ill, I'm clocky as fuck, I'm 6'2", I weigh 260lbs, and I go around saying things like "for me being trans is a spiritual experience..." and "I knew I wanted to be castrated long before I knew I was trans...", like I'm just a TERFs wet dream, and a lolcow waiting to happen.

Anyway, to really put the icing on the cake, I'm now one of those inconvenient trans women who had a really bad experience with gender affirming surgery. Fundraised for 2 years to get an orchiectomy, then had to go and get a serious infection and nearly die about it.

Puts you in a really awkward spot, like my scrotum literally burst, and I feel guilty about complaining about it, cuz it feels like you're letting the side down, and making us look bad in front of the cis. 🙃

But the bottom line is, surgery always comes with risks, gender affirming surgery is no different, cis people have complications from "elective" surgery all the time, many of which are gender affirming, and despite the close call, this is still the best decision I ever made. Fuck all the transphobes.

[alexkablob]

read the sisters of dorley (alyson greaves, 2021-ongoing), a story containing such highlights as:

a satire of the trans healthcare experience in the uk

a meta-commentary on how trans women engage with/reclaim an erotica genre that both helped and hurt us growing up

the full spectrum of the transfem experience (cute & happy vs. absolute horror) juxtaposed together at all times

a bunch of neurotic trans girls in denial about being a cult

the worst opsec you've ever seen saved only by the secret it's protecting being too ludicrous to think of

more codependent transbian relationships than you can shake a stick at

the weirdest sexy chaser lady you've ever met

and a bunch of novelty mugs with really terrible puns

it's an ongoing doorstopper with every content warning under the sun and it makes me feel every human emotion at once

[beautifulqueerexistence]

One Week Post-Op (DI Top Surgery update, TW MENTION: Surgical procedure, surgical complications, medical transition, top surgery drains, Hematoma)

Wow, holy crap, my surgery was a week ago already!

I met with my surgeon yesterday for my first follow up! It was really nice to be able to talk about the small hematoma (a blot clot, more or less!) in my left side, and have her concretely tell me that it’s breaking down the way it’s supposed to, that the neon color drainage IS normal (for a person with a hematoma)… And I got my right side drain out!!! The left will continue to stay in until (at least) my follow up a week from today. The hematoma needs to reliquify slowly and drain, either via my drain or by spreading to the surrounding porous tissue by converting to bruising. That being said, my bruising is gonna WORSEN before it’ll get better, but bruising is a good sign that my hematoma is healing. Swelling is pretty consistent on the left, and she said that everything looks amazing, all things considered!

I realized yesterday that I will never again have to deal with underboob sweat, that weird “tuck your shirt under them so your skin doesn’t stick and get all sweaty gross,” or having to “rest them” while leaning on a table. That was a trippy realization, that at some point I did that for the last time, and now I’m just free of it. I was able to soooorta tilt to my right while sleeping last night, and as a side sleeper, I’m ecstatic about that. I looked at my pre-op photos for the first time since surgery this morning and I’m gonna be honest… I’m already forgetting what they felt like. It feels so dissociated bc my brain just so easily clicked into “Yep, this is what my chest is supposed to look like.” Even with the incisions and bruising it still feels like MY (flat) chest just had some surgery. And that’s a super fucking cool feeling, having my chest feel like MINE, finally feel familiar.

My mom thanked my surgeon yesterday for “that (my) smile” and said “it was an overnight difference with him. I can just see him glowing with relief.” I think that’s a pretty accurate anecdote to leave this update off on. More to come as things progress.

Side note- If anyone has any questions about top surgery, drains, hematomas, or anything adjacent, I’m happy to talk! My DMs are always open. I’m by no means an expert or qualified doctor, but I’m always happy to share my experience in the hope that it helps someone else.

[uncanny-tranny]

Doctors/surgeons should come before a panel of medical experts who are trans before being allowed to administer trans-specific care

[struck-by-the-rain]

terves love to fearmonger and throw hissy fits about "vulnerable autistic gay girls being manipulated into thinking they're trans/non-binary" and like... ok I'm sorry I've spent so many years growing up being treated as some weird, freaky little alien creature rather than as girl/woman, why are you mad that I'm embracing that label and being proud of it as who I am? why are you clutching your pearls so furiously about me walking away from a gender I never felt welcome or comfortable in, partially because of people like you? as much as you claim to be my "sister" or have good intentions for me I guarantee you were one of the kids who would have been treating me like a weird pet on the school playground, the way you talk down to autistic trans people like myself is one and the same as the singsong voice kids would use when they mockingly called me "their best friend!!!". you just hate autistic people having a backbone and autonomy and not having any authority over the weird kid at school anymore

[stuckinapril]

an experience i've had is watching a patient from outside the room lie awake on a ventilator for 6 months, his mind gave up and they plugged the plug but i will never forget watching him just lay everyday awake and the nurses telling me not to get emotionally invested at all

that’s heartbreaking. this reminds me of when i scribed at an er once and watched a patient get wheeled into emergency surgery. they couldn’t save him. i remember the surgeon just moving on to the next patient. meanwhile that night shift literally traumatized me lol. the nurses on hand seemed so soulless w the whole thing too. idk i can just never imagine myself not disintegrating if i ever failed to save a patient. like that would tear me open

[hivepixels]

being a sollux fan is suffering cant even check his tag w/o getting ersl as the first result😭😭 pissed me off so bad i actually blocked the artist sjdjsjjsjdsj

HELPPP i wish tumblr's filter content settings actually hid posts entirely instead of leaving it behind a wall. but i will say there were two fairly recent ersl interpretations that i found pree fresh, rlly gotta clown these charas for the funs

[thursdays-adult]

[bizarreaizen]

reminder: it's never too late to transition <3 /gen

[semisentient-entity]

First sketch on the new laptop wahoo! 🎉🎉

Been wanting to draw Marilyn with her external spinal supports out. I don't have a clear image of what I want them to look like yet just the vibes. (Note: These aren't based on anything from real life don't @ me)

(Taglist under the cut)

@abluehappyface @possibly-eli @the-cinnamon-snail @pinelohearts

@katherann227

@letprecioustimegoby @lysergidedaydreams

[cripplerage]

Pro tip for any marginalised person going to the ER for heart attack symptoms: if you can take an antacid before you go, do it. It's a tip my nurse friend told me. There's a pretty high chance they'll tell you to take one when you get there so saying you've already done that and it didn't work might help you get listened to sooner.

[uncanny-tranny]

I think we can absolutely criticize how gender dysphoria is viewed and defined, but sometimes, I think people can swing too far in the other direction to say that gender dysphoria doesn't exist at all, or that anybody who claims to have gender dysphoria simply have internalized transphobia. I really don't think this is helpful to trans people who are dysphoric, and it really puts us in a shameful position wherein our feelings are deemed proof of being problematic or transphobic.

I absolutely don't think dysphoria is required whatsoever to be trans - I hope my blog has made this position clear. I just hate the way dysphoria is understood by cis doctors and medical professionals, who typically do not talk to or try to understand their dysphoric patients. I don't think the solution is to blame dysphoric trans people, though (or non-dysphoric trans people!). We didn't ask for the state of transphobic healthcare. We need to put the blame where it lies - with biased professionals who don't want to accurately understand dysphoria and how it can overlap with trans identity and the transphobic society many of us live in.