#he's my favorite and I have reasons for his behavior throughout the game
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anonzentimes · 8 months ago
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You're one of my favorite people on here, I love komaeda so much, oh my god
infodump about whatever you want about komaeda NOW!! (if you want, you dont actually have to)
RAGGG!!!!! you're so so sweet oh my gosh ❤️❤️ Sure i'll talk about komaeda! I'll just say what I've been thinking about specifically today.
I was thinking about the fact that Nagito can suppress sides of him today, when he needs to he's able to suppress some of his personality for people. I think the reason Nagito is "normal," before his freakout is not only for the plot twist but because he's trying to make a good impression for Hajime. And once he's even more interested in Hajime he wants his attention, He's always by his side at any chance he gets. I think Hajime just generally stood out to him because he felt a connection with him on a spiritual level and acted upon his curiosity. Why would he be the only one to stay behind and wake up Hajime otherwise? I think he had the gut instinct I do when I feel as if I need to talk to somebody who interests me.
His "facade," is sort of like how when you meet new people and you're not entirely showing your true self fully yet, I think he does that. He's able to suppress parts of himself for other people.
Nagito is always wanting Hajime's attention, he respects his personal space and beliefs but mostly wants to be around him. He's also VERY observant, even when he doesn't understand social cues sometimes his ability to observe others is a big factor about him. He observes Hajime a lot.
Which is honestly weird, isn't he afraid of getting close to people? He usually avoids his classmates, he thinks he isn't deserving of reciprocation, and yet he stayed by Hajime's side. He made an effort to talk normally enough that Hajime would like him. He even went swimming without any complaints, probably because he still doesn't want to lose his attention.
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He continues this behavior throughout the game, even in Chapter 4 he uses the fact he has information to get Hajime's attention.
He doesn't think he's worth the ultimates time, and yet, he's always drawn to Hajime. He's always after Hajime's approval, it's so oddly fascinating to me. It's not an obsession thing, but he just really loves him for some reason. It feels more like an irrational emotion, it's not warped love, it's not about status, and It proceeds on even when he knows he's a despair.
I wonder if maybe, just maybe, if Nagito saw his suicide plan as freeing Hajime from Despair. Maybe that's how he justifies it with his emotions. And in an odd sense a horrible proclamation of love.
Sorry this kind of turned into Komahina more than anything lmao, but mostly I'm just thinking about how weird it is that he likes him, like why? What is it about him that Nagito is so infatuated with him? It goes against what he usually does, was he just really that special that he becomes irrational to his typical behaviors?
And in the free time events he's even more infatuated because he believes Hajime is amazing for tolerating him. He pushes him away so he doesn't get harmed by his luck cycle, but also to hopefully to get Hajime kill him. He wants him to escape, he wants him to create hope. Because he believes someone as great as Hajime can create amazing hope. And then his love confession???? AUGH his love confession like, it's so complicated. Did he bail out because he didn't want him to get hurt by his luck cycle? Did he bail out because he doesn't think he's worthy? LIKE??? He's so crazy.
Nagito's so interesting, his irrational infatuation with Hajime next to his warped beliefs, luck cycle, warped love, and intense obsession with hope to the point that he becomes morally grey over it makes him such a wonderful and entertaining character.
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alexablissmark · 1 year ago
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detention (part 2) [hook x female reader]
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mr. khan leaves you alone with your least favorite person. maybe you'll warm up to him?
warnings: smut, unprotected sex, school setting, mention of suicide attempt, swearing, theft, book throwing, angst
Mr. Khan didn't say anything about Tyler sitting next to you, which was weird. Usually, that isn't allowed when there's only a few kids. But with Mr. Khan being... well, Mr. Khan, he let it happen.
He was also notorious for overworking himself. Filling up his schedule to the absolute max, with little to no breaks during the day. You could tell he was always stressed and sleep deprived because of his twitchy behavior and nervousness. What was even more telling was the bags under his eyes.
Mr. Khan had double booked himself on that day by accident.
Not only did he have detention duty, but he also had a meeting. A meeting he couldn't miss.
So, he left you two by yourselves. How wonderful! You wish you could've just left, or if he could've just let you guys both leave, maybe just give you and Tyler both a warning. But no.
He said he'd be back at 4:25 to dismiss you both and to make sure you both stayed. Great.
Mr. Khan left after that, leaving just you and Tyler. You decided to take your book out again and read. You were able to get through a few more pages throughout the day. It was actually really interesting, but you really, really, didn't want to talk to Tyler.
Tyler took your book.
"The Book Thief?" he said, "What kind of shit is that, Y/N?"
He stood up with your book and started to flip through the pages.
"Seems like it's you. Give it back, please," you said softly.
You tried to be nice. You didn't want to be loud and cause a commotion that would lead Mr. Khan back in the room. It was 3:41.
"No," he said.
You stood up and tried to get it back from him. Tyler was way taller than you, so that plan didn't work out too well. He held it above your head and mocked you when you couldn't reach it.
"Tyler, seriously, give it back," you pleaded. "I don't want Mr. Khan to come back and give us another detention!"
"Fuck Khan and fuck you," he said coldly.
You rolled your eyes, and an idea popped into your head. It was your turn to be petty.
"You wish," you said.
Secretly, you wish he wished it, too. He may have been a raging douchbag, but he was certainly attractive.
"Do I?" he questioned. "Or do you?"
"Ugh, no. Definitely just you."
A very, very light tint of pink stained Tyler's cheeks.
"What makes you think that?" he said while looking to the side.
You looked to the clock before answering. 3:46.
"Well, obviously, if you didn't want to fuck me so bad, you wouldn't be such a dick to me all of the time for no reason. I think you're just trying to hide your feelings for me," you said, mimicking his own cocky smirk.
"Really? Is that what you think?" he questioned, still holding your book. You realized he made you lose your place. What a dick.
"That's exactly what I think."
He threw your book at you. It almost hit you in the face.
"Pft, whatever," he said, sitting back down. You followed suit and returned to your seat. Maybe you finally cracked the case? You caught a glimpse of the clock before he spoke again. 3:48.
"If I wanted to fuck you, I could've done it a long time ago. I'd bet you'd let any guy get in your pants... if he paid you enough," he said with a big grin.
"And you'd fuck any girl if her prices were low enough. The only reason why you don't is because you got that big ego, but down there? You aren't anything special," you whispered while looking right in his eyes. You really wanted to drive that point home.
"You wanna fucking bet, Y/N?"
You were a bit shocked at that one. Surely he wasn't serious. But, you must stay one step ahead of him at any and all costs. You can not let Tyler win at his own game again. The clock read 3:50. You still had time to spare before Mr. Khan came back.
"I think I'd like to take my chances, Tyler."
Before you knew it, a desperate tug on your wrist had you practically on top of the table and his lips on yours. It was very rough. But, there wasn't much time for intimacy anyway.
You could barely breathe. He held the back of your head so you couldn't move. But it was okay, because you didn't want to. In all honestly, the last thing you wanted was for Tyler to stop. Never in a million years did you think Tyler would be the one making you feel this way. Tyler wasted little time putting his lips to your neck and leaving love bites that would surely bruise your skin and be something you'd have to lie to your parents about.
It started in first grade.
You lifted yourself up, so your knees were on the table, and you were bent over, holding onto Tyler's shoulders for support. He grabbed you and sat you on top of his lap, not detaching his lips for a single second. You both wanted to savor this.
For you, it was because Tyler, albeit a piece of shit, was basically your dream man. Fluffy brown hair, warm brown eyes, muscular but not too muscular, and very soft lips, you now learned. For Tyler, he had secretly formed a big crush on you.
When he cut your hair, he saw in a movie at home. It was of a girl giving her husband a locket of her hair before he went to war. He wanted to hold on to your hair, as a symbol of love between you both. He probably should've asked you first.
When he started teasing you, he only did it because he heard girls liked it when boys were mean, because it meant they liked them. Maybe he took it a step too far.
He also wasn't the one who but those notes in your locker. It was Maxwell. Fucking dick. In actuality, he intercepted a few of them. But more than anything, he wanted to apologize and make things right. You never gave him the time of day. He wished he told Max to stop.
When he asked you for pictures, he was at a sleepover. They all asked girls for pictures. Tyler's friend Ricky just made it seem like to everyone else you sent them. He stopped being friends with Ricky after that.
Now, here you are, topless and in his lap. Hands in his hair, quiet moans in his ear. With your help, he took his shirt off, too.
He put his hands on your hips and started to take your [shorts/pants/skirt] off. You stepped out of them and unbuttoned his pants and pulled them down. He went back to giving you hickeys.
"I thought you didn't.... want to do this..?" you said, out of breath.
"I lied," he said.
"I figured."
4:10. You were starting to run out of time.
"Hurry, Tyler," you whispered.
"I'm trying."
He moved his boxers and your underwear out of the way and helped you find your way.
He had to cover your mouth.
"Shhh," he whispered.
He moved his hips up rhythmically, hitting right where it felt the best. You could barely contain yourself or keep your eyes open for that matter. Tyler went back to giving you more love bites and grinned when he felt you moan his name into his hand. He whispered yours back to you.
Your hands were still in his hair, and he maybe enjoyed the pulling and tugging a bit too much. He started to get loud. You gave him a look, one that said to keep it down. 4:13.
After giving him "the look," he tightened his grip on your face and made you keep looking at him. His movements got faster, and you started to fall behind as you got closer to that feeling of bliss you were both chasing.
"I'm sorry, Y/N," he whispered while never breaking eye contact. "I'm sorry for everything."
You really didn't want to forgive him. How could you? In your eyes, he was the one who made you believe that you were worthless. That you were a slut. He made you try to kill yourself.
But, with the way you were feeling, you could forgive him for even the most heinous of crimes, let alone middle school drama.
"It's okay," you said, although it sounded mumbled since he still had his over your mouth.
He started to go faster and harder, which you didn't think was possible.
He let go of your face at 4:16. He kissed you. There was a lot of passion behind it. You tried to match that level but ultimately fell short. Tyler somehow made you feel better than anyone had before. Oh, how the turn tables!
At 4:18, you both finished, and you got off of him but still remained in his lap. He held you close to his chest. Tyler was certainly strong, as his tight grip prevented you from going anywhere. You guys stayed like that in silence for a while, with the occasional forehead and neck kisses.
It wasn't until 4:24 when you both realized the time.
You scrambled to get your clothes back on. Right after you sat back down, Mr. Khan came back. Right on the dot.
He let you guys leave. And he was totally and utterly unaware of the events that just unfolded.
Tyler walked you to your car. You turned back to look at him, your back once again to the drivers side door. Instead of telling him to eat a dick, you gave him a hug. He hugged you back. It was 4:32 when he let you go, and kissed you goodbye.
You guys didn't become a couple, but you became really close friends. There wasn't a day that went by that he didn't make you laugh or vice versa. It was during a late-night car drive that you guys reenacted the events that took place a few weeks ago, right under Mr. Khans nose. It was a lot more intimate, with you guys not having a time limit to stop the fun.
It was in that car that Tyler told you how the events that have transpired over the last few years really went down. You felt bad. If only you would've heard him out.
Well, better late than never.
Because now he was all yours, and you didn't intend on sharing. Sharing is overrated, anyway. Fortunately, Tyler didn't like sharing either. You grew to learn just how protective he was.
You hated more than anything to admit it, but, maybe detention wasn't so bad after all.
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erika111111 · 2 months ago
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Unpopular opinion about Josh Washington from Until Dawn
Josh is my favorite character in Until Dawn... but he IS a pervert.
I get it. He's an absolutely heartbreaking character with severe mental illness and a strong love for his sisters. A lot of us can relate to him, and I know that's why a lot of us do jumping gymnastics to try to deny him being a pervert, because that's the part we don't necessarily approve of or relate to. But the erasure of this VERY prevalent part of his personality is not doing the character justice. I find that a lot with Supermassive Games, that fans of a character will try to ignore or undo any of a said character's flaws completely and entirely, but honestly what makes SMG characters so amazing to me is that they're just like real people, with good and bad traits intertwined.
The endless excuses of "He was just joking" or "He was just trying to provoke them" or "It was just for his prank" are just exhausting at this point. Don't all of these things start to add up eventually? Not to mention that "just joking" does qualify you as a pervert. I do agree that the things he said about Jessica and Ashley in the shed were just to piss Mike and Chris off, but everything prior to that is inexcusable. Yes, he was trying to convince Chris to pursue Ashley in the beginning, but he didn't have to say such gross things. And Chris (depending on your answers) agrees with him, and nobody ever says that Chris isn't a pervert, so why does it not apply to Josh, the one who suggests and says these gross things to begin with? And he uses that type of lingo often, like calling everyone porn stars and the things he says to Jess and Mike before they leave to the guest cabin. Again, there's no reason for him to say these things, he's just a perverted little guy with a dirty mind.
And that's okay!! Again, Josh is my favorite Until Dawn character and possibly my favorite SMG character as a whole. I don't need him to NOT be a pervert just for him to be a likeable, relatable, or heartbreaking character. If anything, that makes me like him even more because it shows he really was just a normal teenager before everything happened. The fact that Josh fans feel the need to erase or excuse all of his perverted behavior is damaging and exhausting.
To get to the heart of why I think this conversation started to begin with, I also don't believe Josh was recording Mike and Jess in the guest cabin. I don't believe there were any cameras outside of the main house and the shed, simply because it was never brought up or hinted at ever throughout the game. We never saw a camera perspective inside of the guest cabin when playing there, and Josh never showed footage to anyone of the guest cabin, nor did he bring it up to provoke Mike at any point. Why Josh sent them to the guest cabin and away from all the drama to begin with despite them being so prevalent to the initial prank, that's a whole 'nother discussion. But point being, I just don't think there were cameras there. HOWEVER, even if there were, I honestly feel like this would have been one of the more "explainable" acts of Josh's perversion, given the theory is that he was doing it to avenge Hannah who was also recorded undressing/trying to have sex. So it really wouldn't have been because Josh just wanted to watch his friends' porno, it would have been to humiliate them like they did to Hannah. Yet, this is somehow the conversation that sparked pervert Josh vs. pure Josh originally...
On that note, he did factually record Sam naked, and I am more mixed on this one. He was definitely trying to make Sam feel uncomfortable and frightened, but I think it's clear that Josh has some underlying attraction to Sam. This is also a debate on its own, but I think there's some pretty strong evidence here. Even as the Psycho, he refers to Sam sexually or uses sexual terms, like "a beautiful bathing bird" and "here, pussy pussy." I feel as if his entire segment with Sam definitely has sexual undertones. But he didn't do this with Ashley or Chris. To be fair, it might have been because he was trying to push Ashley and Chris into each other instead, but I highly doubt Josh thought of himself as the Psycho was any competition. And, perhaps, the Sam/Psycho segment was sexual just to be the token "naked final girl" horror trope. It's hard to say entirely, and Josh's Psycho character was obviously just that, a character, and didn't necessarily represent his true feelings about anyone, but again, in combination with everything else, it's safe to say that Josh has a dirty mind. AND, not to mention, he makes sexual comments toward Sam prior to the Psycho segment as well, like asking her if she "needs any help" with taking a bath. Again, there's zero reason for him to say these things if he wasn't perverted or dirty-minded.
And again, THAT'S OKAY. In no way does Josh being a pervert make him a bad character, unrelatable, irredeemable, or anything of the such. Again, he's my favorite Until Dawn character and one of my favorite fictional characters ever. But I like this character for who he is in his entirety, and that includes him being a pervert. Because he is! I've been seeing so many posts and comments everywhere for months now with everyone saying he's not a pervert and attacking anyone who says he is, and it's gotten annoying. We need to be able to like characters without ignoring and erasing all of their flaws.
Edit: Because I feel the need to clarify this since people love to make horrible assumptions these days, in NO WAY am I justifying unwanted sexual comments or advances. Pretty much every character in Until Dawn is perverted, not just Josh, and everyone is "in on" Josh's perverted comments and jokes, so to speak, and they all play along or reciprocate. This post is just about Josh because his perversion is the only one that gets ignored or denied. I don't approve of the things he said or did to Sam as the Psycho or to Mike and Chris in the shed. A lot of people who do actually acknowledge Josh's harmful perversion just excuse it by saying "boys will be boys" and that's even more annoying than denying it altogether. If his comments always made the other characters uncomfortable, I might think differently of him, but again, everyone's a pervert just like him and don't mind. But I also don't think his moments as the Psycho or in the shed should be excused as "boys will be boys" because that's not "normal teenage boy behavior," and I think people deserve to be able to criticize him for these moments. It's always one extreme or the other with Until Dawn fans and it's exhausting. Yes, Josh is a pervert. And yes, you can criticize him for the harmful perversion. Again, every SMG character is multi-dimensional and you can debate what parts of them you do or don't like. But don't deny any parts or come up with bad excuses for them.
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eddiegettingshot · 5 months ago
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"but buck SAID he wanted that man’s attention!" is so funny bc he spent the entire episode trying to get eddie's attention, and it was only at the end where he said that and even then he was like, yeah... I guess I was trying to get your attention 🤷 like. the guy found out that eddie was taking tommy to the basketball game and he was like gonna gate crash the game bc I'm jealous that eddie has a new friend. it was never about tommy SPECIFICALLY, it was always about eddie spending time with someone new, someone who wasn't him. and yet they think tommy was the reason for buck acting like that throughout the entire ep lmao
yeah that’s my second favorite part is that like. despite SAYING it, after asking for the tour, buck did not actually try to get that man’s attention AT ALL!!!! 😭 his actions and his words don’t line up even a little bit, that should be the first clue that he’s an unreliable narrator!!! like the ambiguity in this episode is soooo crazy. his feelings might be tangled up but his actions are all about eddie … and it’s not like buck is SHY and history would suggest that buck should have been all over tommy 😭 there’s also something to be said about the fact that they managed to write this in a way where buck stopped being normal about his attraction to men (which has always existed, he just thought it was typical straight behavior) the moment it butted up against his relationship with eddie. super cool stuff
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ark-barkness · 23 days ago
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It took me a bit longer than expected but I finally wanna talk about Tennis Ace. Spoilers for Keisuke's and Shoichi's routes ahead ⚠️
I know I said before how I think Yuuichi is the best MC of all visual novels, but I never explained in full detail why. So today I wanna talk about Yuuichi
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Point number 1: His growth as a character
Yuuichi is a character that I frickin love for a simple reason, he has a HUGE room to grow as a character.
During the prologue of the game Yuuichi is on a rut. He stopped caring about Tennis, barely putting in any effort. As the story progresses depending on your choices and the route, Yuuichi rekindles his love for tennis, especially in Keisuke's route where not only he finds the motivation to start putting in the effort again, but he also starts acting like a proper menton and senior for the newest members of the club.
His relationship with his friends is also a huge part of his growth as a character, let me explain.
Point number 2, Yuuichi is kind of a bad friend
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Yuuichi tends to be an airhead, he does or says things that end up hurting his friends, but he doesn't do them out of malice and once he's called out he tends to back off and try to change his behavior, except in certain scenarios. Yuuichi, just like Dave from Password, has a huge Atlas complex, and just like Dave's it comes from not wanting to deal with his own shit.
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This is frustrating as hell, but again, it gives him a lot of room to grow. In the perfect route with Shoichi he starts correcting that behavior, in Jun's route he learns to be a better friend, in Keisuke's route he realizes how bad teammate and senior has he been.
It's still frustrating but I still love that point of auto realization he has in all routes.
Point number 3, Yuuichi feels like an authentic person realizing he's gay
Yuuichi is not demisexual, his past relationships with girls didn't work because he didn't have a strong connection with them, it was just that he wasn't into them, plain and simple.
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He's gay! Yuuichi slowly realizing his friends, classmates, teammates and even professors are cute or handsome is one of my favorite parts of Yuuichi's inner monologues, and he only needed to get a boyfriend to realize it.
TL;DR: Yuuichi is the best MC in a furry visual novel because he feels real, because he's flawed, because he grows as a character.
I don't want a big, muscular, perfect wolf as an MC, that's boring (...but hot). I want a character that tries his best and feels genuine, that doesn't stay the same throughout the whole game, that ultimately learns his lesson and grows as a character. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.
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sasterisk · 5 months ago
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Why do you love Suitloon so much? Also can you make more art of them thank you...
I am SO GLAD YOU ASKED I will now be explaining why I adore Suitloon. (This is gonna get long)
During my first viewing of Season 2, I was absolutely hooked on Suitcase! I related to her a lot, being in middle school at the time I was figuring out life, and being a student with ADHD made me feel out of place and like others were taking advantage of me at times. I also related a lot to Balloon, as I was trying to prove myself to a strictly education-focused mother, it felt like I was nothing but a slacker in her mind, much like how Nickel views Balloon during season 2.
Besides my own relation to these characters, I'd like to talk about what happens in the show itself to solidify my adoration of Suitloon as a ship both platonic and romantic: (I know that Balloon is on the aro-ace spectrum, but I was shipping them before that was said. Objects in object shows having "sexualities" involving sex is a debatable thing as these are kids shows and I've had many debates with online friends on if objects would even have the... ahem... anatomy, let alone a sex drive OR the social idea of gender and sex existing within the object show universes. Do what you will, I see Balloon as demiromantic and Suitloon is bi4bi.)
Name a pair of characters in this show that are more devoted to each other and willing to sacrifice themselves for the other, I can't think of any, I find that Suitcase and Balloon are so intertwined with each other and that they truly and deeply care about each other.
Evidence of this devotion and sacrifice? I gotcha...
The elimination scene of Episode 11: Balloon knew how everyone would vote, seeing Suitcase being fed up with how Nickel treated them, and voted for himself to make it look like he voted for Nickel, and Suitcase voted for him, protecting her place in the alliance while sacrificing his place in the game. Suitcase, however, finally stands up for herself, calling out Nickels unjust behavior towards the both of them and sacrificing her place in the alliance to vouch for Balloons good character.
It's important to remember that Suitcase was friends with Balloon throughout the whole of the show! I don't see her being too socially unaware, she knew that everyone thought Balloon was a horrible person, especially two of her other friends Nickel and Baseball. She also expressed some skepticism of Balloon in Episode 6, over his previous manipulation in season 1, which they HEALTHILY COMMUNICATE ABOUT *cough* Nickel learn something here pls *cough*, and in Episode 10 her anxiety/hallucinations question which of her bonds are solid or hollow. Despite this, she CHOOSES to be close with Balloon because she genuinely cares about him, sacrificing her social stance to the other contestants AND taking a risk in trusting him at first, before they form a very solid bond.
[NOT CANON] Meanwhile, Balloon is also not socially unaware, he knows everyone hates him, and while being friends with Suitcase, I like to imagine he would think "I should stop associating with her so that she doesn't suffer the other contestants judgement."
Rain On Your Charade. That whole scene, enough said.
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5. Mazed and Confused, especially this scene:
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6. Mazed and Confused part 2:
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Theres many other instances that show their devotion to each other as well, but these are a few of the most important and my favorite ones!
Overall, the main reason why I love Suitloon is the raw devotion they have for each other in the face of adversity. Suitcases story is one of overcoming social pressure and anxiety, learning when and how to stand up for both herself and for someone she cares about. Balloons story is learning when the approval and judgement of others matters, as well as finding people who genuinely care about him and learning how important these people are. These stories intertwine in a very natural and believable way and make these two feel destined to be together in the end, whether that's platonic or romantic.
I also find it important to bring up this chart:
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Basically, Nickel is the ringleader, Baseball is a reinforcer/outsider, Suitcase is a defender, and Balloon is the target. The rest of the II cast fall between reinforcers, outsiders, and assistants. The way Nickel treats Balloon is textbook bullying, not one other person stands up for Balloon publicly, and Suitcase is doing the right thing standing up for him.
Theres also A BUNCH of other reasons I love this ship that have to do with my own preferences,
Friends to Lovers > Enemies to Lovers sorry Nickloon fans.
Its got a "Romeo and Juliet" kind of dynamic with how Nickel and Baseball play into the situation
The Nickel-Suitcase-Balloon dynamic reeks of "overprotective father hating his daughters boyfriend" as well (like hotel transylvania type shit)
Their dynamic is sickly sweet they are so cute oh my god
While on Instagram and Wattpad in yee olden days (2017-2020) I got a bit of a reputation for being a Suitloon fanatic and played into it, I was dubbed "The Queen of Suitloon" for a moment. It gave me a place in the fandom, and I cherish my time there greatly.
TLDR: Suitcase and Balloon are devoted to each other and that's why I love them so much.
And yes I will make more art with them eventually :P
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ghduck · 2 months ago
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The Art of Shit Stirring: The Story of My Life
by Troglodyte
CHAPTER 3
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It had been apperent that by second grade, there were a few concerns about my behavior; negatively speaking. Second grade had been an interesting ride I'll say. It was around this time that I had got a new music teacher.
Whos name was Mr. AdCOCK (Laugh all you want)
My new friends and I, as well as other students in my grade at that point would normally make fun of him for his bald spot, horrid singing voice, and his teeth, which were extremely yellow.
I don't care if he sees this writing someday. He can fucking kick it.
I had a massive obsession with video games around this age, usually gushing over Mario and Sonic games whenever I could. That's how I found my best friend at that point, who had the name of Knowledge.
There was also I girl in which we hated each other, and I would casually attempt to start a fight or argument with her for no reason. This happened almost every single day. Somehow my parents never got called over this, and I'm still in shock.
Anyway, our teacher at the time, is still one of my all time favorites, mostly because she got hilariously angry to the point of breaking her own possessions.
FUNNIEST. SHIT. EVER.
I believe the only real time I got in trouble in second grade, was when I said something inappropriate in the school bathroom (which I will not repeat). My teacher ended up calling my Dad over the situation, which I don't remember how it ended.
When third grade hit around, this is when I had my first "crush".
Oh christ.
At the time, I was in the third grade, while she was in the second. I recall getting playfully bullied for this interest, to the point of my cousin telling her herself. Later in the year, we became closer friends, but we were too young for relationship s anyway. I haven't seen her since 4th grade.
Throughout third grade, I also had many mental meltdowns, to the point of destroying school property (Which leads to question myself on having an anxiety disorder mostly later on in life). This was the last time my crying phase stopped, as well as temper tantrums.
My brother had revisited the popular game "Alien Hominid" on the Xbox 360 at this time. I remember being around 3 to 4 years old watching my brother play the bloodiest, most vulgar flash games on newgrounds.com, and alien Hominid was one of them. Although it was mildly gory, it was helly fun to come back too. Even nowadays, I still come back to this game.
That's how I aslo discovered the game Castle Crashers.
Third grade was also when I learned about sexual content on the internet. (We won't talk about that)
Then when fourth grade spun around, this was when I started switching classes. My math/science teacher was very cool though. She had a great sense of humor, and we often had a great relationship. It has become known to me that my behavioral issues also stopped in this grade.
During the middle of the year, I struggled with a few things mentally, constantly thinking I was a failure, due to me don't ng quite poorly in my grades. But, that got sorted out within a month. My friends at this time were very "show offy" I'll say. They often got in more trouble than I ever had at any time before hand.
Then things all went to shite months later.
When the month of March came around, BOOM. Pandemic takes a chokehold of our life's and we are all stuck at home.
Here are some artifacts from 2018-2020
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carefulfears · 2 years ago
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Yes! It’s especially insane with Phoebe bc like the show goes out of it’s way to explicitly show how fucked up she was idk how people forget it
yep yep yep!! it's quite literally the entire point of the episode. but i still see people all the time like...calling mulder stupid for "trusting" her and making jokes about the way he behaves around her and it's just like...please don't piss me off. same exact thing with diana.
fire is one of my favorite episodes though i think it's such an interesting look at mulder's character and example of the ways that he views and interacts with people close to him
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because he understands and acknowledges from the very beginning that phoebe's just there to fuck with him, that she made the trip from boston to DC to bring him in on the investigation for no reason other than knowing that it will scare him
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he knows what she’s doing, and he still agrees to help her
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his only concession being that scully not be involved
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noting that he's not going to "put her through" phoebe's games
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this is something that we've seen him do before, with his former partner jerry earlier in season one, who broke into his office and stole his work.
it's clear throughout ghost in the machine that mulder isn't comfortable working with him, but helps him anyway because jerry asked him to
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and builds him up when jerry is feeling insecure
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he infamously does it again with diana, always affording her the benefit of the doubt and defending her
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and with his parents, consistently coming whenever they call, despite all of their lies and neglect
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(side note from pulling ghost in the machine caps but his ties in this ep are soooo classic baby spooky i miss s1 soooo much)
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anyway, this is the dynamic that fire circles around, and the only time in the episode that mulder pushes back against phoebe is when he cracks this joke about having a "refined technique" with women who cheat
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which he apologizes for instantly, recognizing that it upset her
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fire is also one of the best portrayals of the true sign of a toxic/abusive relationship: not realizing anything is wrong with it until you tell your best friend
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i see criticism of this episode sometimes that interprets it as glorifying phoebe, portraying her as sexy and her behavior as righteous, but i disagree.
i don't think that you can base the episode's stance on phoebe on mulder's behavior, he's responding to her through a very warped and controlled lens. just because he views her in a positive light, doesn't mean that we should as the audience.
whereas, scully is immediately wary of phoebe and critical of her, even before knowing the context for her actions.
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this shot is my favorite lmao. she is contemplating murder. she is wondering if she could get away with it.
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her lil passive aggressive "bye bitch" finger wave
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her "mmmmyeah sure sherlock"
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her watchful eye as she hangs in the doorway while mulder and phoebe meet with the arson specialist
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she literally sits at his desk in his chair and waits for him just to make this sherlock holmes joke 😭😭😭 they are BEST friends
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now, this is when she finds out the true history with phoebe, and the reason behind her visit. and it's when mulder tells her that she's off the case.
and from that point, scully starts investigating the murders herself, consulting her own sources to put together her own theories
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while these two do absolutely fuck all
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she shows up uninvited at the event in boston, having SOLVED THE CASE HER-FUCKING-SELF
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and she's the only one who gives a fuck when mulder gets hurt
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while phoebe shakes hands and schmoozes at the party
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sweetie pie making sure her partner gets some water and some rest
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now, dana 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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after making sure mulder is okay (and getting a peek at him shirtless) she shows him the evidence that she found, telling him that she just "didn't know a whole lot about arson" so took the opportunity to do some research "for my own edification, of course" GIRLLLLL
and they identify the groundskeeper as the murderer based on the information that she gathered
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the face of a woman who single-handedly solved a string of serial murders to get her best friend's bitch of an ex away from him. she is truly an inspiration to us all.
and she has 1 more sherlock holmes joke in her.
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so, anyway, mulder is visibly uncomfortable around phoebe from the start, and this is something that scully picks up on immediately, even before being told any information about phoebe or her motives
and this is an ongoing theme from the very beginning, as mulder is generally unaggressive and compassionate to a fault, leaving scully feeling a responsibility to be conscious and wary of their surroundings.
scully isn't being jealous towards phoebe, just like she isn't "taking things personally" with diana. she understands this about mulder and how exploitable it is, and she's fiercely protective of both him and the kindhearted qualities that leave him vulnerable to these situations
anyway TLDR let me see any of you call either of them stupid again
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maddymoreau · 6 days ago
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Dead Space 2 Live-Blog: COMPLETE
Chapter: Seven to Fifteen
Dead Space Complete Live-Blog: Click Here
Part 1: Click Here Part 2+3: Click Here Part 4-6: Click Here
Instead of summarizing the plot I'm going to break down my thoughts into different sections.
Horror to Action:
One big change from the original Dead Space to Dead Space 2 is that it's more of an action game than horror.
I saw someone online perfectly described it like this: Dead Space is like the movie Alien while Dead Space 2 is like Aliens.
I think the transition from horror to action was handled very well. All additions to the gameplay were EXTREMELY fun!! I especially like the hacking mini game, crawling through the vents and the multiple interactive cutscenes.
The original Dead Space is still my favorite, but Dead Space 2 is an AWESOME game!!! If you're interested in the Dead Space franchise I'd 100% recommend playing it!!!
LOOK HOW COOL THESE SCENES ARE!!!
Warning: Jumpscare
Characters:
Ellie Langford:
I think she's a great parallel to Isaac. Both being CEC workers who lost the people they cared about thanks to Necromorphs. I enjoyed her character, I felt bad when Nolan stabbed her eye out and I liked that she didn't let Isaac sacrifice himself.
I thought the callback to the original ending was great!
Dead Space Ending:
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Dead Space 2 Ending:
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Dead Space 3 Spoiler: I heard there’s a romance between Isaac and Ellie which is fineee. Don’t love the ship, but it's whatever.
Nolan Stross:
Nolan was my favorite new character and the one I have the most thoughts on. He is also a great parallel to Isaac. Both are victims of the Marker and EarthGov.
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The entire game I was wondering why they experimented on Nolan, but it turns out you have to watch the animated movie Dead Space: Aftermath for that answer!
The reason EarthGov experimented on Nolan was because he had come in contact with a shard of the Red Marker. It's frustrating that information wasn't clearly explained in the game.
MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY DO I HAVE TO LEARN THROUGH A MOVIE THAT HE KILLED HIS WIFE AND CHILD BECAUSE THE MARKER MADE HIM HALLUCINATE THEY WERE NECROMORPHS!?!?!?
This line from a video log makes sense now:
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Nolan: “ . . . it was just a shard -it was just a shard . . . but it put so much stuff in my head . . . so much . . . shit in my head . . . There's no more room . . . for anything. I can't remember what she looks like . . . Why can't I remember what she looks like?"
I feel like that's pretty relevant information to the story!!! Especially since it would've made the scene where Isaac kills Nolan in self defense hit WAYYY harder. Isaac understands how terrifying and realistic the hallucinations can be.
There's also the detail that the Marker amplifies violent thoughts. Explaining some of Nolan's behavior and why Isaac ended up killing Nolan when defending himself. I found it tragic that Nolan's death was how Isaac later figured out the final step.
One issue I have with Dead Space 2 is that the EarthGov experimented on them for over three years, but there's barely any data and text logs in the game about that.
I WANT MORE LOOK HOW SCARY THIS SHIT IS!!!
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Shoutout to this reddit post for helping me understand: Click Here
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I'm dying to know how Isaac reacted to his first session 👀 Look how terrified Nolan was just remembering them:
When I played the original Dead Space I took SO MANY notes after reading text and audio logs. However in Dead Space 2 they're severely underused.
The Marker:
Throughout Dead Space 2 the Marker is making Isaac experience horrific hallucinations. Constantly playing mind games with him in order to push Isaac into being able to finish the four steps.
Something we've seen Nolan discuss:
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There's four steps:
Step One: Crawl inside the dark machine.
Step Two: The screws go tight all around.
Step Three: Cross my heart and hope to die . . . stick a needle in your eye.
Step Four: Acceptance
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Nolan was unable to accept what he had done making reaching step four impossible. Also Nolan tried stabbing Isaac and Ellie in the eye so they could accomplish step three.
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Isaac was able to reach step four by accepting Nicole's death and letting go of his guilt.
He laters stops the Convergence from happening. I'm still unsure what that exactly is . . . Dead Space 3 is suppose to explain that more. In the process Isaac destroys the Sprawl and new Marker.
Hans Tiedemann:
He's the main antagonist throughout Dead Space 2. Constantly trying to prevent Isaac from destroying the new Marker. I think he's a very weak villain. His goal is to preserve the Marker, because he believes humans are so close to figuring out how to control it. Tiedemann oversaw the experiments happening to Isaac.
Tiedmann: "I knew you were trouble from the start but they told me you were necessary. That your mind was the purest. I've spent years sifting through your demented brain this was not the way it was suppose to happen."
It's a huge shame though that there's no reports about this or flashbacks! Tiedemann feels like an obstacle not a threat.
I liked the detail that the Marker burned into his flesh the word PAIN:
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Also Tiedemann reported to someone called the Overseer 👀
Daina:
She felt very pointless. I learned chapter five, which is the chapter she dies, is where the demo originally ended. It almost feels like they shoehorned her in for the demo. The first five chapter felt very separated from the rest of the story.
The Story:
I think Dead Space 2 is a wonderful game!!
The story is solid however I must admit I could care less about the EarthGov in Dead Space. It's a currupt government . . . nothing special. The most interesting aspect of the EarthGov is its conflict with the Church of Unitology. The Church sections were so beautiful and interesting. I want more of that and MORE LORE PLEASEEE I LOVE CORRUPT CHURCHES IN STORIES!!!!!
The Church of Unitology was so pretty look at these photos I got off the steam community page <3
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Ranking: Gameplay 9/10, Horror 6/10, Story 7.5/10 and enjoyment 8.5/10.
I couldn't fit it into the review but it was super cool we got to go onto the Ishimaru again! Also that the EarthGov lied about what happened, claiming it was a terrorist attack.
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tc-doherty · 4 months ago
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Character Inspiration Tag Game
Tagged by @the-letterbox-archives
I figured I would do Kit because I know you like him a lot!
So actually the very original idea for Untitled 3 was inspired by a completely mediocre anime that will remain nameless because I can't stress enough how totally mid it is. And even watching the audacity of the anime team trying to do a last-minute "no homo" in the final two episodes and completely failing to even stick the landing does not make up for watching the rest of it. In general I can say that what came from here was the idea of two idiot teenage boys (one of whom is a prince) from different worlds who argue constantly, and then it turns out that one of them is actually from that world originally and they have a deeper connection than random chance.
Of course in mine, it's Kit's family who's from that world, not Kit himself.
Otherwise I took a lot of inspiration from various mythology, the idea of them being geas bound due to a blood oath, for instance.
For Kit's personality I mostly just started with what kind of behavior would be the most annoying to Anrikas, and what kind of person Kit would have to be in order to say those things. And of course, what sort of upbringing would lead to that kind of behavior. His personality did evolve a lot throughout the course of writing the first draft though. I can't believe that in my original plans he was the more emotionally stable one, it just doesn't make sense that somebody who acts like him would fill that particular role.
But there is a sneaky Easter egg here.
Actually, Kit's design and partially his family's situation/history was inspired by Illsaide and his mother from Vampire Game, one of my all time favorite manga that nobody else has ever heard of. The whole plot arc about Illsaide, the Sea King, and the Sea King's daughter has lived in my head rent free since 2006 or something, and when I realized I was going to end up writing something similar I couldn't help it hahaha
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Anyway, that's the reason that Kit and all of the other seafolk have red hair. Additionally, his design and even some of his behaviors were also modeled on Yuujin from the same manga who I was and still am obsessed with.
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Here's an example of him being annoying, I don't have many pics on hand but I DO have this one.
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Otherwise when coming up with his race I took a lot of inspiration from myths about sirens and selkies, and also a little bit of unicorn lore from some certain books, for some reason? Not sure how that worked its way in there but it did. There's a teensy bit of inspiration from stuff like Song of the Wanderer and The Last Unicorn. And also legends about the Seelie court and other folklore about being spirited away.
That's basically it though, the rest of it all came about just from writing.
Tagging: @unclear-contributions @outpost51 @magefaery @memento-morri-writes @bloodlessheirbyjacques and anyone else :)
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samofmine · 4 months ago
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character game, for sam ❤️
18, 19, 21
omg OKAY SO
18. well GUESS. Wincest obviously, but in every form, samdean, gencest, weecest, weirdcest and so on. i love sam's babybrotherisms that pop out whenever he's with dean, i love how jealous and possessive he gets over dean, and i love their contrasting personalities that cant help but blend since they live in each other's pockets. also i think that the way sam's personality was molded into a softer, surrendered version because of dean's constant dominant sometimes abusive behavior throughout the seasons is very well constructed, truly fascinating to me. i could go on and on but let me stop here. lmao
19. hmmm i dont think there's a relationship i dislike because sam's character is very 'isolated' from having deep connections with other characters (unlike dean), so the few that he does connect to shows different aspects of him that are always a delight to see. i was kinda bored with the whole amelia situation but i loved seeing him all soft and the whole widow x widow thing they had going on.
21. i love everything about sam's character so for me it's amazing to explore different aspects of his personality when i'm writing. i think my favorite thing is to enter sam's mind and think about what his reaction would be in certain situations. i also love to write the whumpiest whump tropes. because. of reasons.
tysm for asking x
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in-a-bucket · 2 years ago
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A silly little crack(?) theory for DRDT
Major spoilers for everything up until chapter 2 episode 7
When it comes to media I love, I usually end up getting super mega attached to one particular character more than any of the others. For Danganronpa: Despair Time, that happens to be Whit Young. And with the events of the most recent episode having taken place, I’ve been brainrotting about DRDT and by extension Whit a lot recently. Combine that with getting to look at the DRDT hidden quotes (link here: https://despairing-disaster.tumblr.com/post/658279268422500352/drdt-hidden-quote-masterpost), and thus this silly little theory was born. The tldr is basically that Whit is the mastermind. I don’t want it to be true because I don’t want my favorite character to be the reason all this suffering is happening, but I can’t deny Whit’s strange behavior throughout the entirety of the game, but especially during the end of chapter 1 and chapter 2. Keep in mind that a lot of this is pure speculation and I wrote it all for fun. With that out of the way, let’s get into the thick of it.
First of all, this is the quote that started it all:
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This quote basically screams “mastermind” in my opinion, especially with the whole “I know how everyone reacts to murder” bit. When I first saw this quote, my gut instinct told me it was Teruko who says this. The fact that Teruko is resigned to the fact that her luck will cause life to be terrible for her and those around her and the fact that Mai (the unnamed student) was supposedly looking for her, made me think that Teruko had a lot to do with why this killing game was happening in the first place and this likely still remains true. However, the more I thought about, the more are realized this quote lines up with Whit’s strange behavior once people start dying.
First, let’s talk about Whit’s “intuition”,
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When I first watched these episodes this was very interesting. Not only is it brought up more than once (there might even be more instances of this but I just forgot them idk) it’s also in bolded yellow text, like it’s important and something that the audience is supposed to remember. I also find it interesting that when this is brought up, he has the same, somewhat downcast expression on his face, almost as if he’s slightly upset by the fact that he knows what he thinks to be right. The hidden quote above talks about knowing the outcome and knowing how people will react to something. If you had been through something enough times to know what would come next and how people would react of course you would have good intuition about everything. The quote also talks about caring about how caring for people for so long, even knowing what would happen cause the person speaking immense suffering, enough to the point where they became bored with it all, so it would make sense for someone be upset that they know what’s coming next and can’t do any thing to change it.
There’s also how Whit has delt with death in the series so far. 
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His reaction to Min’s execution is, uh, not normal to say the least. He even ends up making a joke about it later on. Someone who has become bored or resigned to death likely wouldn’t be super affected by something like Min’s gruesome execution, especially if you know how that was going to play out. With the last screenshot, that isn’t the kind of thing you should say when your looking for a possibly dead person, hell you could even make an argument with the last screenshot about how that plays into his intuition and he knew how Arei was going to die, even if he wasn’t the one who committed the murder (this one is a bit of a stretch tho).
I’m not sure how his hidden quotes would fit into to all of this. However, the stuff I’ve talked about could explain his odd behavior and reactions to stuff throughout the series.
If we don’t get any explanation why he acts so nonchalantly about these types of things, then my suspicions of him will only continue to rise. I don’t want him to be evil though. I do know for sure I’m extremely invested in where his character is going and I hope he lives a while in order to see it to fruition.
Again this all just some fun speculation and is most likely me reading wayyyyyy too much into things, but I’m truly excited for where DRDT is going next.
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webraciszekbastion · 1 year ago
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My suggestions for the real names of the Characters from Danganronpa F: Shattered Hope.
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Hello and welcome, brothers, sisters and non-binary comrades. I was bored, so I decided to share something I came up with some time ago. Namely, what the cast's real names are, in my opinion.
It's for fun.
Enigma - Dylan Thompson: I can't really justify my choice. I just think that the name Dylan suits both Enigma and the protagonist. Additionally, when I imagine that the others call him Dylan, I immediately label him with that name.
Cancel - Mary Brétan: I know Cancel, she said at free events that she was from California. However, seeing her clothes and her long, night-black hair, I am not convinced that this girl does not have Romanian roots.
Yaxi - Ivory Espadera: When I hear this name, I also hear its strength. A strong name for a strong woman warrior.
Grisp - Grant: I was thinking about the name Grispa and I think he would probably have a crazier, more unusual name. But the name Grant suits me too. When I heard the name Grant, the first thing I thought of was a tall and well-built man. Moreover, it is a distinctive name with a calm tone. Good name for Grisp.
Scarlet - Adreinne Phu: Sounds elegant to me. Therefore, for the beautiful, motherly figure of this killer game, it is absolutely perfect in my opinion.
Cross - Albert River: When I was thinking about a name for Cross, for some strange reason my mind went to the game "The Witcher". I kept thinking of something that had a "serious" or "intelligent" connotation to it. And so, thinking about the name and random, reimagined scenes from "The Witcher", the name Albert River came up, and honestly. I just really like it.
Moraiteru - Brooke Sirano: I'm not sure how I came to this conclusion. I have the impression that Mora has some family in Spain.
Corza - Trevor Talde: His name is Trevor, like Enigma's, his name is Dylan. God, why am I so stubborn about these two names?
Pocket - Paul Green: I love Poket, and its greatest asset is its voice actor, who I think does a great job. That's why I named him "Green". When I was a child, I heard many times from my mother that the color green was calming. Pocket Voice is my green color.
Rock - Gregory Stone: Do you get it? Because he's a Geologist whose last name is "Stone." I'm comical. Quite seriously. Rock's love of verbal jokes influenced my decision. After all, Rock was delighted to remember his name. (At least that's what I think)
Rox - Elena Wright: A beautiful name for a beautiful journalist. I like the name "Elena" so much, so I immediately knew what name sounded perfect for Rox. Besides, I think you'll agree that Rox would be like a female version of Phoenix, screaming "Objection" throughout the trial room.
Twin - Kenneth Flash: Kenneth will always be known to me as an archetypal character who is cheerful, full of life and cares for the wound. Yes! Kenneth is his name, I'm even more insistent than with Corza and Enigma. The name Flash comes from the fact that Twin captured my heart at flash speed.
Rissi - Kaitlyn Hart: Sounds cute and innocent to me. It accurately captures the wonderful person Rissi is.
Anon - Zack Smitch: When I thought about it a bit and looked at his nickname, the fact that it is currently targeted, that Anon will not have any talent and his behavior, I associated him with an ordinary surname. However, I gave the name more expressive, because the aura of an ordinary Anon raises some suspicions.
What do you think about this ? Have you had any thoughts on what the real names of our favorite fourteen Ultimats might be?
Have a nice day/night
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aspd-culture · 2 years ago
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Do you have books/movies recommendation that represents aspd well fiction or nonfiction?
Hhhhh I was waiting for this question to come one day. The answer is lowkey v v disappointing.
Because... no, not really. I've got like three, two of which do what I consider a fairly good job, and one that rides the fence of being a lil "oh great, the ASPD character likes blood and guts and death".
Sorry this is so long-winded tldr Ender's Game (book only), House, MD if you can handle some not ok 2000's comedy, and Wednesday if you never get into the fandom.
In order of, in my opinion, best to least best (they're all still p good):
I tried to make these spoiler free but it's hard while explaining good vs bad rep. I would recommend going into Ender's Game blind without reading what I wrote about it and coming back to this post after. I would read the warning attached to the other two.
Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card (The book not the movie, oh my gosh, not the movie) - Peak ASPD right here. When I was a kid with ASPD, this is the only book I ever related to and I randomly picked it bc it was the third name on the mandatory summer reading list and 3 is my OCD's favorite number. It rarely lets me down, and in this case, brought me a seriously well-done look at ASPD done, possibly entirely without meaning to. Orson Scott Card, as far as I'm aware, set out to write a book about trauma and the way that different types of trauma shapes the mind in early childhood, and preschool aged children engaging in active military training is... woof. It's a lot when something that you relate to so much is a depiction of a war-era dystopia. There are definitely parts that still push the stigma, and a lot of what makes Ender "good" is the sympathy and compassion and "purity" he shows, so be ready for that. That said, this also shows how a kid can still fit the definition of a loving, innocent child even while actively engaging in violence. It's a bit preachy with its message, but it is a damn good book. I will openly admit I have never gotten around to reading the sequels purely bc they were not in my school libraries. I wonder if Libby has them... *takes mental note*. There are also questions about if Ender's siblings possibly have cluster b disorders themselves. I have seen theories that both Peter and Valentine have NPD, and a more controversial theory that Valentine has NPD while Peter has BPD and the book just happens to focus on demonizing him (as a character to make a point about him and Valentine, not because of the disorder) so it doesn't emphasize the non-splitting behavior. Just, do yourself a favor and don't read into psych articles about Ender's Game. They make a big deal out of Ender being a good character because he is "saved" by his empathy and just... idk the book is written from his POV and I don't see much empathy there. I see compassion. I see cognitive empathy. I do not see affective empathy besides with a couple Exceptions.
House, MD - the profile pic is for a reason. More than House, MD is a show about doctors or medicine, it is a show about House's struggle with his mental health. We watch him slowly get through the process of recognizing, adapting to, and working on his symptoms throughout the show. It honestly helped me before I even realized I had ASPD to improve my relationships with people by learning from his mistakes.
House is (minor spoiler) canonically diagnosed with "Antisocial traits" around season 6 I believe, but he experiences them the entire time. He is written as a character who I believe was supposed to have ASPD. If not, he is one of the most accurate accidents turned canon I have ever seen. That said, this show does not shy away from the negative aspects of ASPD. Many people say horrible things about House throughout the series, many of them he does not bother to argue with or deny. It is... really emotional for me sometimes to see how they speak to and about him and how he handles that. It's really good, but does have one very triggering episode about a "true sociopath" and House's struggles with relating to her also around Season 5 or 6. It's one I wouldn't skip if you're watching this for ASPD reasons, but House *does* try and separate himself from a "true sociopath" so be ready for some stigma. Also please note that this show is from around 2004. Lots of flip phones, ha ha ha, but also lots of excess stigma on things, somewhat homophobic and transphobic jokes, etc. Although, it is worth noting that it is a symptom of House's ASPD to make these jokes - he expects that they know he is not serious because of his tone and doesn't, due to lack of empathy, understand that these jokes are hurtful even when people know you don't believe what you're joking about to be true. He builds his team around making sure they can handle that part of him, which is a pretty decent thing to do, in my opinion, even though the right thing to do would be to change the behavior. But yeah, shitty early 2000's humor incoming with this show. I still 100% feel it is worth the watch, but I am white and thus have the privilege of feeling comfortable while watching it. Black people especially may be really (understandably) unable to feel comfortable watching this because the person that House worries is most similar to him and thus most threatening to his position is Foreman, who is a Black man, and thus many of House's "it's ok because he knows I don't believe it" jokes are targetting Foreman and many times they are racist jokes. He in no way solely targets Foreman, but that is there and it is extremely frequent. When you meet people named Taub and Thirteen, Jewish and fellow LGBT people will join the club in being potentially seriously uncomfortable with these jokes. I could handle watching it, ymmv.
The third and somewhat problematic lil sister, Wednesday (2022) - Hear me out, it is so good, imo, but I cannot interact with the fandom on this one and it loses serious points because of that. The reason that I can't? The entire fandom has decided that Wednesday Addams, a long-time rare ASPD coded girl, is autistic and "through the lens of Tim Burton" vs acknowledging that she is ASPD coded. Everything that can be an autistic trait, many have cherry-picked as proof she is autistic, and they openly choose to ignore a major step in diagnosis, making sure that the symptoms are not better described elsewhere. I will concede she may be autistic (although tbh I don't think so bc of her serious lack of stimming, - and no the SINGLE DANCE SCENE AT A SCHOOL DANCE doesn't count - lack of meltdowns, and affinity for sitting perfectly still don't read autistic imo), but she has ASPD. A literal therapist talks to her about "the source of (her) antisocial traits" and because she is a child, that is the closest thing to a diagnosis of ASPD she can be given. The girl is loudly ASPD coded just like the character Wednesday Addams always has been.
Further, there is a point to be made about the ASPD coded character being given her own show for it to turn out to be a m*rder mystery as well as her obsession with everything dark, broody, bloody, and macabre. Admittedly, in The Addams Family, that's everyone in her family not just the ASPD coded one but in Wednesday, she is the only character who likes those things so it's a bit ick in that regard. Still, I relate a lot to her and always have and people used to try n bully me in school by calling me Wednesday but my mom showed me it and said I reminded her of Wednesday as a compliment when I was little and I always took it as one after that even when I knew they meant it in a mean way.
Unfortunately, ASPD, unlike many disorders, is not underrepresented in media. It is overrepresented in the worst ways possible. Every other book or movie I can find is full of stereotypes, mean-spirited commentary, and m*rder. There might be something to be said about a character from It's Always Sunny, but that show is a major trigger for me so I haven't been able to watch it to tell, and Lisa from Girl, Interrupted (book or movie) is just... painfully bad but well-loved rep. Like, I love her, but holy crap girlfriend, how did you manage to add stigma in a book and movie about destigmatizing mental health?
The fact that even counting bad but well-loved representation I can still count all of it on one hand sucks, and if anyone has more I am begging you to share in replies.
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zevfern · 1 year ago
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My thoughts on the core members of the Phantom Thieves from Persona 5! Spoilers ahead.
Kenta (Joker): he's just like me for real!
But seriously though, I really like Joker, and it's cool to RP as him, especially since the modern setting allows me to do so more naturally. I especially like fitting in pro wrestling related headcanons to his behavior (my headcanon is that Kenta is a huge pro wrestling fan, and before the events of the game was training to join a dojo after graduating HS).
Ryuji: THE BROOOOO
My favorite of the Phantom Thieves, his hotheaded and impulsive personality reminds me of a friend I have irl. For some reason his voice reminds me of Axel from KH despite the two having different VAs, and the two characters are quite different as well. He was the first confidant I completed, and maybe in a different timeline he would have been romanceable.
Ann: A rose by another name
Ann's very sweet and kind, and yet posseses tons of internal strength. Her whole story arc with Shiho and her recovery is so heartwarming it was hard not to shed tears during their farewell. Her VA also did an incredible job throughout the game, it's between her and Ryuji for best VA performance in my opinion.
Yusuke: Lorenz Hellman Gloucester, but poor
Really knocked me for a loop when I first saw this guy, but despite the looks he is quite different from his Fodlan doppelganger. His confidant cutscenes are some of the goofiest in the game despite (or maybe because of?) his serious demeanor. Yusuke also gets bonus points for introducing Hifumi Togo into the story, the girl I chose to romance in my first playthrough.
Makoto: Breaking the rules, for once
This is a very unpopular opinion, but I don't particularly like Makoto. Her whole "follows the rules but her true self wants to break them" isn't appealing to me, reminding me of a few other characters from other games and media I've never connected with. That said, I do think she has a great friendship with Haru, and their Showtime is incredible (it's a series of pro wrestling moves ending with a tag team finisher! They are in love a tag team your honor.)
Futaba: On the spectrum, off the wall
It's always interesting to see characters in video games who are autism coded, and while Futaba isn't perfect (of course she's a hacker and visits 4chan 🙄), it's the little details like her elementary school memories (surprisingly similar to mine) and the way she approaches her self improvement after having her heart stolen that really impressed me.
Haru: We fly balloons on this fuel called love
I'd been extremely exited to meet Haru from the first time I sighted her in game, as she's voiced by the same VA who voiced Marianne and I wanted to compare the two characters. In contrast to Marianne's gloomy demeanor that eventually turns hopeful, Haru is a beam of light right from the beginning. Her introduction as a Beauty Thief is the funniest gag in the game, and she keeps her optimism despite incredible hardship involving her father. Shame she's introduced so late, by the time I got her confidants I was already with Hifumi.
Akechi: I have forgiven Maxwell
The moment Joker met Akechi, this started playing in the background:
Hair jokes aside, Akechi's a fascinating antagonist: much like Kenta/Joker and his friends he's an outcast in Japanese society, an orphan living in poverty, and has only been accepted due to his newfound fame as the Detective Prince. While visibly he resembles Light Yagami, his personality reminds me of MJF, who also manipulated the people around him for his own gain. I haven't finished the game yet so I don't know if Akechi will repent, but MJF did turn face with Adam Cole's friendship, so maybe Joker can do the same to Akechi.
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shadowshrike · 1 year ago
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Why I enjoy the yips arc
Disclaimer: This essay is exactly what it says on the tin. If you hate the yips arc or get upset when people don't love Sawamura from the beginning, you will likely want to skip over this post.
For me, the infamous 'yips arc' sold Sawamura. To be honest, I don't tend to like MCs in anime. Especially shonen anime. They don't resonate with my personal experiences regarding competition, failure, and growth.
When I started Daiya, I didn't appreciate the loud-mouthed "hard worker" zero-to-hero sunshine teenage MC that was dead set on causing me as much second-hand embarrassment as possible. I only continued my journey with the story for two reasons: the rest of the team was more grounded, and the plot tended to not reward Sawamura's early egotistical or out-of-touch behaviors with instant success.
It was only when I hit the yips arc that I wanted to root for Sawamura to the end from the bottom of my heart. He was no longer just comic relief or a guy who would suddenly obtain convenient new skills to make sure he stayed relevant in typical MC fashion. While he had the yips, Sawamura proved himself to be a true competitor capable of meaningful fear. One who doesn't steamroll everything when it really counts because he's a prodigy protagonist with a can-do attitude that everybody loves. Yes, Sawamura remained a hardworking prodigy of sorts throughout Daiya, but he more explicitly needed the help of his team and deep self-reflection to reach his potential and move forward during the yips.
Now, there are a lot of people in the fandom who hate the yips arc. I completely understand not wanting to see your favorite character suffer. Especially when 'tough love' communication styles don't feel like love to you. It's also unpleasant to watch many beloved characters struggle to cope after a loss, all while a new villain (at the time) is introduced in Ochiai. But for me, who was not a Sawamura enjoyer until after this arc, I appreciated it. It became a core thread in the tapestry of Seido's team coming together during the aftermath of a foundation-shattering defeat.
A bit about the yips
For those unfamiliar with the real-life condition, the yips are a notoriously difficult thing to treat. There is no cure, just things to try or avoid. Even the help of the best psychological experts at top levels of play can fail to salvage a professional's game after years of treatment.
Many high school athletes have had their careers ended before they began by the yips, forcing them out of their sport entirely. Others recover with minimal help or after a short slump. The scariest part is that you don't know which camp you're going to be in, recovery or permanent breakdown, and you can switch between them at any point.
Although the prognosis for someone who develops the yips is uncertain at best, I've gone through and seen friends go through stages similar to what's shown in Sawamura's journey. I'd argue Daiya touches on these as realistically as it tackles the other disappointing realities of playing a sport. That is to say - it mimics the real deal with a touch of dramatic flair.
Now, I'm no expert on the yips or sports psychology, but I've simplified the 'stages' of the condition I have experienced or witnessed to exemplify why this arc resonated so well with me.
Stage 1 - What's happening?
Failure following a high-stress moment makes the yips seem like normal performance anxiety. It may take a while to realize what's happened if it only appears in specific situations. You try to shake off the bad memory with your normal coping strategies.
Performance anxiety is a constant companion in competition. Nerves after a bad performance, in particular, are expected. Sometimes you luck out and recover immediately. Other times you have to go back to basics or shake things up to reset, especially if your nerves only hit during performance situations and not practice.
You may attempt to ignore it in hopes it will go away like normal. When your usual attempts to get back in the groove all fail is when panic sets in.
We see this most clearly when Sawamura starts falling apart for the first time while throwing inside. It's a story shown through Miyuki more than Sawamura, strangely, since Miyuki's many responsibilities include helping his pitchers regulate their emotions.
As a catcher, Miyuki has a wide bag of tricks to get pitchers going after a slump. Although his caustic tactics are infamous, that isn't the only way he treats them during a game, nor does he treat every pitcher the same, especially after this arc. With Sawamura, Miyuki's go-to is riling him up. Sawamura loves to rise to a challenge. He pitches his best when someone's pushing him or he has something to prove.
But when Sawamura fails repeatedly to respond in his normal way to his calls inside, Miyuki realizes this may not be some normal fluke of bad control. We see Miyuki's darkened expression before he decides what brave face he's going to put on to get Sawamura back on track. He tries other tactics - joking to take the tension out of the situation and redirect anger to him, and eventually trying to directly reassure Sawamura - both of which don't fix the situation and lead us into the next stage.
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Stage 2 - I've got the yips, but don't pity me
You realize that the muscle memory is "gone". Something you used to be able to do without thinking about it now forces your brain to focus on every step. You struggle with failure, fear of not getting it back, and the sympathy of others.
When you're a highly competitive person in a competitive environment, being told that your sub-par performance is okay is an awful feeling. It feels like a person is sugarcoating the obvious truth to spare your feelings. What should be a gentle attempt to cheer you up from friends or teammates can become confirmation that they never believed in you in the first place, especially when you usually have a relationship based around friendly trash-talk.
In the worst cases, you may feel like they expected you to fail when you thought you could succeed. They pity you as the 'poor, broken player'. And the last thing you want to do when someone treats you inappropriately softly is validate that you need to be coddled.
This piggybacks off of the previous stage and can serve as a mental block throughout the entire treatment process. What stood out to me in the story was how we mostly saw yips through the other characters. Sawamura didn't really ask for help. In fact, he was unusually agreeable to everyone because he desperately wanted to prove that he could live up to their expectations without those expectations being lowered.
You may recall this is the same player who said, "their kindness hurts". Sawamura thrives in the high-drive teenage sports environment where friends talk shit to each other because they believe in one another. When that stops, it hurts.
Sawamura doesn't want sympathy. He doesn't want understanding or pity because he knows the way he played was indefensible. All he wants is to perform again.
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Stage 3 - Step away
Take a break from the affected activity to reset the brain.
This is to avoid cementing unwanted mental patterns. As they say, practice makes permanent. The break may be self-imposed or made mandatory by an authority figure. If you're part of an active team, it can include a demotion or temporary removal. That status change is demoralizing but necessary after the nature of your condition is clear, not only for the success of the team but for you to have less pressure on you while you change tracks.
This is also typically when your mentors start developing a plan to help you recover, or when they adopt a 'wait and see' approach before intervening further.
Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be a sports psychologist at Seido. It isn't surprising, but it does mean we don't see that as a potential aid here. Instead, the treatment comes in a way many might consider 'old-fashioned' but is a reality for most people.
Taking an approach such as saying, "go run," without a full explanation of why the break might help or what the long-term treatment plan might be isn't something I'd personally recommend. However, it fits with what we've seen in the strictly hierarchical world of HS baseball at Seido. The coach very rarely or never explains himself to his players, and as readers, we often only find out what he's trying to do through analytical characters like Miyuki, who piece it together themselves.
This is also common, if not desirable according to some cultures, in competitive environments. The coach is in charge - you trust their judgment and assume there is a plan, whether or not you understand it.
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This phase is also where we see Sawamura's other established teachers deciding what to do. Chris tells Kanemaru to wait and see, and that he thinks Sawamura will recover on his own.
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Miyuki, on the other hand, waffles between not being able to spend time on Sawamura due to his own personal challenges as captain and responsibilities to his struggling team, and wanting to make sure Sawamura overcomes the yips. It's unclear if his motivation is due to guilt, friendship, practicality, or some combination of the three, but in the end, he decides he has to take a proactive approach.
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Stage 4 - Everything and the kitchen sink
If the condition persists, try new approaches to replace the lost technique.
This might include learning a new skill so you don't have to do what the yips are affecting, moving to a totally different environment or league, trying a new position, or pursuing any number of therapies. Typically, the old technique is not being used at this point except to test progress. Sometimes this phase will allow a player to ignore their condition by cutting out the problem behavior entirely, thus letting them return to their previous position without recovering from the yips.
There are two main examples of this I can think of that we see during the yips arc. The most controversial is the advice by Ochiai to completely change Sawamura's delivery so he can remain useful to the team. Although this was quickly overturned because of the reason Ochiai suggested it - not actually to help Sawamura's recovery because he was already pitching again at that point but to make him 'useful' - a pitcher changing his delivery to overcome the yips is surprisingly not without historical precedent as an idea. Daniel Bard tried a huge number of things, including temporarily becoming a sidearm pitcher, to recover from the yips.
Ultimately, Miyuki, Chris, and Katoaka settle on the skill replacement idea by teaching him the out-low. It's unclear if the original idea came from Miyuki or Katoaka, though the implication is this was Miyuki's plan, and Chris agreed with it when approached, reversing his previous stance that Sawamura could recover on his own.
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Regardless, all three seem hopeful that this new set of pitches can get Sawamura back in the lineup and help him recover mentally. Even with that hope in mind, they know he may or may not ever be able to pitch inside again. That isn't the point of teaching the out-low, though it would (and does) make him more dangerous if he can regain his original pitches. The point is to catalyze a return of Sawamura's confidence for his own sake and that of the team.
It also serves as a foundation for an important mental skill. Relaxing. As goofy as it looks, it works well for Sawamura and makes an enormous difference in his pitching.
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Stage 5 (hopefully) - Oh hey, it's back!
With a lot of repetition, experimentation, and a healthy dose of luck, you spontaneously regain what you lost.
If you're one of the lucky ones, your mental block may disappear as suddenly and quickly as it appeared. Something 'clicks' and you're able to perform as you used to. The recovery isn't always permanent, unfortunately, and even if it is, you'll need to practice on your good days to make the consistency stick after so long away.
Ultimately, Sawamura is able to recover after persevering through several games. It was both a joy to see and unsurprising, considering the nature of the story. In Sawamura's case, he ends up stronger for having gone through the yips. Not only mentally, after having his often naively optimistic nature challenged, but physically with a wider pitching repertoire.
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One thing I want to make clear before I finish
Although dealing with the yips does require incredible mental strength due to its frustrating and demoralizing nature, recovering or not recovering doesn't prove your superior or inferior character as a person. No person, technique, attitude, or therapy has been shown to reliably reverse the yips once they've occurred. All you can do is work hard, experiment, and hope it pays off. Thankfully for Sawamura, it did, and it allowed us to see him mature significantly as a person and a pitcher.
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