#he's just venting his frustration on the only person he can blame

[monstersqueen]

well i'm back to laughing now

p much exactly like that shirou :p as far as he's concerned you've already tried

[gojos-thot-patrol]

Otherwise known as Seven Minuets in Heaven Part. 2 ;)

Find Part One Here!

Dating isn't easy, and falling in love is even harder. Ryomens love for you isn't up for debate, you're the only girl he's ever felt this way about. What is questionable though is if he's ready to leave his playboy life for you. Were diving back into the Modern Day Frat Boy AU

Warning: This fic contains smut, fingering, cunnilingus, a creampie- you know the drill, as well as Hurt/Comfort, possessive themes (especially in the smut), yandere themes if you squint, and a very much unwanted kiss. Reader discretion is advised <3

It’s surreal just how many times a heart can break before it shatters. How many times you can watch your boyfriend, who swore oh so many times that you were his one and only, flirt with truly breath taking girls before you finally snap. How many times you can accept the unacceptable before it feels like a full body breakdown, before you’re hiding in your room, crying into his hoodie because despite everything he was still so comforting to your stupid heart that still hadn’t caught up with your brain in terms of relationship status. 

But I’m getting ahead of myself. This story technically starts four months ago, and about a week after your first personal encounter with Ryomen Sukuna. 

“Hey man, are you gonna eat that?” Gojo asked, pointing to Ryomens waffle. Sukuna barely looked up from his phone before pushing the plate over to the white haired man, who took it greedily. The act caught the attention of group empath (derogatory) Suguru Geto, who raised an eyebrow at Ryomen from the other side of his coffee cup.

“You feelin’ ok man?” He asked, setting the mug down.

“She still hasn’t responded to my text, but she read it. Is this what getting ghosted feels like?” Ryomen asked, finally looking up from his phone, “This shit blows, why do I keep doing it to people?” 

“Because you’re a creep.” Nanami said without thinking from behind his book, ignoring the glare from both Suguru and Sukuna.

“Is this about the girl from the party?” Geto questioned, failing horribly to hide his genuine shock. “You haven’t moved on yet?”

“Can’t blame him, she was hot as fuck.” Gojo pointed out, not even bothering to swallow the food in his mouth. A move that would backfire when Suguru hit his back, causing him to choke. 

“It’s not for a lack of trying!” Ryomen said, pointedly ignoring Satoru, “Trust me, I have. I even tried hooking up with that one girl from the Kappa Phi Beta sorority, fucking....” He snapped his fingers to try and remember her name, “Yuki? I think?”

“And?” Gojo asked.

“I couldn't go through with it!” He snapped, more in frustrated with himself than anything else, “I felt like…wrong about it, like dirty. I faked a stomachache to get her to go home.”

“Uh huh.” Suguru said, sharing a concerned glance with Gojo. “Go on.”

“The whole time I was just thinking about Y/n.” He sighed, now earning Nanamis attention too, “About what she would think, and what if she finds out and it hurts her, I just…I couldn't do that.” Ryomen grumbled, resting his cheek on the table. It felt good to vent. Until he realized all three of his friends were looking at him as if he had just grown a second set of arms and two more eyes. “What?” He asked.

“Ryomen…” Suguru started slowly, trying to think of how to put this gently, “You…are a fucking moron.”

“Poor bastard..” Nanami muttered, shaking his head.

“This bitch got his dick wet once and fell in love.” Satoru laughed. Ryomens entire soul flinched at the suggestion, and panicked at the notion it could be right.

“No, absolutely not, that’s insane.” He insisted, sitting back up. “I’ve known her for like, a week! Who falls in love in a week?!” Frat boys in fan fiction, thats who.

“Then why are you getting so caught up in the fact she hasn’t texted you back?” Suguru asked. This was not helping Ryomens panic.

“Because it’s weird! Normally girls text me back immediately.”

“Right, so why does it matter so much that this one hasn’t?” 

“Because…because!-”

“Because you’re in love.” Gojo giggled.

“Say that one more time Satoru and I’ll put Nair in your shampoo bottle.” Sukuna threatened. Satoru was suddenly very quiet.

“You still haven't answered the question,” Geto reminded him. 

“It’s because I don’t want the other girls to text me back! I want her to! I want her attention, I want to talk to her, I want- Oh god damn it.” His ramblings turned into a near whine as he dropped his head into his hands at the realization. Suguru patted his back, trying to be comforting. 

“It’s okay man, it happens to the best of us.” He assured him. He handed him his coffee cup, “Here, try this. It might help.” Ryomen had no fucking clue how black coffee was supposed to help, so of course he had to try it. The moment it hit his tongue he realized why it was supposed to help, almost spitting the drink out at the shock of the flavor. That wasn’t coffee. He looked up at who claimed to be the responsible one.

“Fucking Kahlua?” He asked. Geto shrugged.

“Technically its a black russian, so some vodka too.”

“Suguru It’s seven am.”

♥️♥️♥️

Two weeks after that conversation, you still hadn’t left that poor fools mind. "Either I didn't hear you right or you've picked up a coke habit." You scoffed. He shook his head.

"Nah, coke's a rich person drug. A lowly college student like me can only afford crack."

"They're the same thing, different forms."

"Tell that to the law." He shrugged. You dropped the argument there, knowing he had a point. You just rolled your eyes.

"Then I must not have heard you correctly." You groaned, "why are you inviting me to go fuck at your dorm at," you checked your phone, "8:17 AM?" He grinned and you wanted to punch him in the face. That grin never failed to make your heart flutter and squeal and want to marry him. Stupid fucking heart. 

"I never said hook up, I asked if you wanted to go on a date.” Ryomen clarified, “Like, to go get lunch or something.” And this is where your confusion came in. You had been casually sleeping with Ryomen for a few weeks now, which was fun. But you had convinced yourself he would never want anything more. Why would he? You thought he had a roster of beautiful women getting in and out of his bed, why would he give that up to be with just one? It didn’t make sense to you.

“Ryomen, I thought we agreed we were going to keep it casual.” You reminded him. It was the unwritten contract the two of you agreed to when you started hooking up. It was to keep both of you from getting hurt feelings. He sighed and raised his hands in defense.

“Okay, not a date.” He paused for a second, “Hey, do you wanna like, go get dinner tonight, maybe catch a movie and then head back to mine?” He asked. You felt a blood vessel pop. At this point in your “relationship” with him, you were almost positive the only thing he kept behind those pretty doe eyes was the god damn audacity.

"Ryomen, that sounds like a date." You pointed out.

"Does it?" He played dumb, "well, if you insist we can make it a date." He fucking grinned again. 

"No." 

"Oh come on!" He said it loudly enough to earn a sharp shush from the teacher, reminding him that other people were here to learn not date. He rolled his eyes and returned to a whisper. "What's the worst thing that could happen if you go out with me?" He asked.

What's the worst thing that could happen? Easy: You fall in love. You already knew you liked him way more than any reasonable person would or should. His sense of humor fell in line perfectly with yours, you had similar taste in music and movies, and you knew that he was more caring than he would ever care to admit; a trait you noticed from watching him interact with his friends. To top it all off, he was smart as hell, and he was about as beautiful as God said the Devil would be. He was fucking dangerous, and so easy to love, you couldn't blame any of the girls that fell before you.

And that was the issue. Ryomen had a vice, and it was women. You’d seen it in action on campus, the way past flings would come up to him to try and rekindle something that was never lit in the first place. And he ate that shit up. He loved basking in the attention given to him, and if it made you jealous now, you couldn’t imagine the fights you’d get into if he was officially yours. And you really didn’t need a criminal record.

"What's the worst that could happen?" You reiterated, "I get Syphilis."

"I hate to break it to you, beautiful, but if that was the case you'd already have it." He chuckled. Yeah, you walked right into that one. You pinched the bridge of your nose, repressing the urge to yell at him that it was way too early for this shit.

"Ryo-"

"I love it when you call me that." 

"-Men, Ryomen let me finish," you groaned, "I'm really trying to pay attention here, can you just drop it?" You sighed in exasperation. 

"Sure, if you agree to go out with me." He smirked. 

"Why are you so desperate for this date?!" You struggled to maintain a whisper, "Isn’t what we’re doing right now enough? You’re already getting what you want out of me, why do you want more?" 

Ryomen felt himself shatter, like a wine glass being forced to endure Mariah Careys’ high note. He thought the two of you had moved past your perception of him as a fuck boy using you for you body but, apparently not. Did you not know? Did you not know you were the only woman that was allowed to sleep in his bed? The only girl who he brought to just casually hang out with his friends? The only person in the world that he had ever cuddled with? He didn’t talk about his after graduation plans with any of those other girls. He didn’t talk about his little brother, or why he was a business major to them. He didn’t stay up all night talking to them because he just wanted to hear their voice. All of that was reserved for you. You had no idea just how special you were to him.

"Because I don't just want your body, I want you!" He said just a little bit too loudly. Great, now people were looking, "You've all I've been thinking about for weeks, do you know how weird this is for me?! I'm going crazy over you, and you won't even give me a chance, You won’t let me prove to you that you’re important to me!” You could feel the eyes of the classroom drill into you, and it made you want to shrink away. Something had to give.

"If I agree to go on one, count them, one" you held up a finger for emphasis, "date with you, will you shut up?"

"Without hesitation."

"Fine, then shut up." You chastised him.

"Wait, so is that a yes?" He smiled wide, and if he was a dog his ears would have perked up.

"That's not shutting up!" You reminded him, "it's only a yes if you don't say another word this entire class period." He beamed as he nodded, giving the universal sign for 'My Lips Are Zipped' as he settled into his seat, and you wondered what the hell you had gotten yourself into.

♥️♥️♥️

“You dress way too extravagant for him.” Mei Mei sighed as she saw your outfit. You didn’t see where she was coming from. A tight, albeit plain, black mini dress with pumps was hardly what you would call extravagant. Though, you supposed in the context of your typical wardrobe it was quite the contrast. But, this was your fifth date with Ryomen, and he told you to dress nice. You thought back to your one date stipulation, and almost laughed. You really didn’t expect that first date to go so well.

“Aren’t you the one that told me there’s nothing wrong with dressing up for a date?” You asked as you finished putting on your earrings. She rolled her eyes as you threw that back at her.

“Yeah, if you think your relationship with the guy might actually go somewhere it’s fine.”

“Who’s to say my relationship with Ryo won’t go somewhere?” You scoffed as you turned to her. She scoffed back.

“Ryo?” She all but sneered, “Gross. And it won’t go anywhere because it’s Ryomen Sukuna. He’s like, the literal definition of manslut. He’s going to break your heart Y/n, and you’re not even his official girlfriend. You’re his toy.” Mei muttered. You fought the urge to roll your eyes. You knew her condescension came from a place of concern. Mei Mei had been with a lot of guys, and had her heart broken by even more. You almost took what she said into consideration. Then you remembered she had never really expressed concern for you before your situationship, and quickly brushed her off.

“He’s waiting for me.” You smiled at her as you left your shared dorm. You found him standing outside the building, exactly where he said he’d be. He always looked handsome, but tonight he looked damn near dashing. The black dress shirt and slacks worked for him, especially with the sleeves rolled up. He grinned when he saw you, and your heart squealed like a school girl in a shoujo anime. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t walk a little faster to get into his arms.

“Hey gorgeous,” He laughed as he picked you up in one of his signature bear hugs. You could get lost in the comfort of his arms. He sat you down with an adoring smile. 

“Hey Handsome,” you winked, “Ready for our date?” He was taking you to a super upscale restaurant downtown. One of those places where you have to make the reservation like, a week in advance and pay way too much for not enough food. Admittedly, it made you kinda nervous.

“No, not at all,” His confession was disguised with a joke. He was as nervous as you were. “I have to give you something first.” By the power of plot, it was only then that you noticed the thin box in his hand. He lifted it up, presenting it to you as if he was a jeweler as he opened it. You didn’t quite process what you were looking at at first. It was a small white gold, cursive R with small rubies embedded into the stem of the letter. The pendent hung from a dainty white gold chain, and every ounce of your poor kid blood just knew that necklace cost more than your parents rent. 

“Ryomen, what the fuck?” You asked, not fully processing the situation.

“I like to mark what’s mine.” He shrugged with a devilish smirk, “You don’t have to take it, but I bet it would look good on you.” 

“I look good in everything,” You said, taking it out of the box to admire it. It really was a beautiful piece of custom jewelry. Your first reaction was to reject the gift. Gifts like these didn’t come without conditions, expectations. You knew that by accepting the necklace, you were accepting Ryomen. You couldn’t deny your situation anymore, couldn’t delude yourself into thinking the two of you were less than what you were. You’d have to accept the reality in front of you, the future in front of you. You looked at him and felt the smile tug at your lips. “Will you put it on me?” 

“Gladly.” He said, trading you box for necklace. As he fastened the ornate safety clasp around your neck, he leaned down. “I trust you know this means you’re my girl, yeah?” He whispered, his warm breath sending shivers down your spine. 

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” You hummed, placing a hand on his head to hold him still while you kissed his cheek. Mei Mei was gonna be pissed.

♥️♥️♥️

“Look, we’ll only be there for like, thirty minuets,” Sukuna groaned, rubbing his temple with his left hand. “ABO is throwing the party, so all of us have to show some face.”

“Do you have to show some face, or sell some weed?” You asked, crossing your arms as the two of you walked down the street. In the two months you had been with Sukuna, you had been to more parties than you could count. Which was really starting to stress you out, considering you fucking hated parties.

“Why cant it be both?” he sighed.

“You still haven’t explained why I need to come.” You huffed, pulling down your short dress. You had been trying to put more effort into your appearance lately, and experimenting with just how much skin you were comfortable showing. Sometimes you got it right, sometimes you didn’t.

“I told you babe, guys are fucking idiots. They wanna buy drugs from the guy with the prettiest girl on his arm, and when you’re with me, I’m always that guy.” He smirked, hoping that was going to diffuse the situation at least a little bit. It didn’t. Of course it didn’t.

“Really? You’re flirting with me? Right now?” You scoffed.

“It was worth a shot, right?” He shrugged. 

“I’m going to fucking bite you!” you threatened, stopping in your tracks to emphasize how pissed off you were. He sighed again as he stopped and turned to face you. He put his hands on your hips and pulled you closer to him, fighting the grin that came up as he noticed the slight shock on your face. He managed to suppress it though, and put his puppy dog eyes into action for evil.

“I know you don’t want to go babygirl, I’m sorry,” He murmured to you, ghosting the back of his knuckles along your jawline, “But will you go? For me? I’m only asking for thirty minuets.” Fuck. Fuck. This was a dirty tactic and he fucking knew it. You sighed, dropping your forehead onto his chest, and hugging him back as he pulled you into a proper embrace.

“Fine, but…can you promise me you’re not going to flirt any other girls there? Or let them flirt with you?” You muttered.You didn’t just hate parties for the drunken social aspect of them, though that was a part of it. No, you hated them because they always started fights in your relationship. Normally, you loved being with Ryomen. He was sweet and caring, and you knew he loved you. But he also had a problem with leading on other girls. 

You knew his attention whore antics would be a problem, and while you believed him when he said it was never physical- just flirting, that he didn’t even realize he was doing it, it always hurt you anyway. There was always a seed of doubt that it wasn’t as subconscious as he claimed. That maybe he didn’t love you as much as he said he did.

“Of course baby girl, you know you’re my one and only.” He promised, wrapping his arm around you as he walked you to the fraternity house. You had a sinking feeling in your soul this was a bad idea, one that only got worse as you saw all the drop dead gorgeous women in the room.

“Hey, I’m gonna go grab us some drinks, want anything?” He asked, knocking you out of your thoughts. 

“Oh, yeah. I’ll come with.” You said, following Ryomen to the kitchen. There sat Nanami in his designated spot behind the bar, half heartedly listening to an art major talk about the impressionist movement. He was nodding along like he understood, like he was engaged, but there was no light behind his eyes. You felt bad for the art major. 

Ryomen grabbed two cups of the frat jungle juice for the two of you. You took yours and quickly started to chug without even considering who made it, and almost immediately gagged at the burn. You managed to choke it down after a fight for your life. “What the hell is in that?!” You snapped.

“Oh, Suguru made the juice this time,” Nanami said, taking any opportunity to leave the art history conversation, “It has like, an entire bottle of everclear in it.”

“An entire bottle?” You asked in disbelief, “Is he okay?”

“No.” Nanami scoffed, as if you should know. 

“Hey, Ryomen!” Satoru laughed as he and Suguru spotted Sukuna. They walked into the kitchen. “And Y/n!” Gojo gasped when he saw you, always shocked to see you at these events no matter how many you attended. He ran over and hugged you, causing you to chuckle softly and Ryomens eye to twitch. He quickly got in between you two, pulling you from Satorus arms and into his. Gojo rolled his eyes, but otherwise let it go.

“I’m glad you could make it!” He smiled.

“I always do,” You laughed to hide your frustration with that statement. 

“We’ve got a beer pong table set up outside, wanna play?” Suguru asked. There was a beat before you realized.

“Wait, me?” You asked, a little shocked. You fully expected him to be talking to Ryomen.

“Yeah, you,” He chuckled, “You’re our Fraternity Sweetheart, we gotta show you off somehow, right?”

“She is not the frat sweetheart.” Ryomen scoffed before you could process the information. 

“Oh yes she is!” Gojo declared, “Everyone on campus knows it!” Everyone except you apparently.

“No, shes not!” Ryomen insisted. He hated that they called you that. It made him feel like he had to share you with them, a thought that made him actively violent. They could find some other sorority sister to be their sweetheart, but you were his. “Nanami, back me up here.”

“Sorry man, I’m with the boys on this one.” He shrugged, “She’s at all of our events, she’s here every weekend, the chapter loves her.” Oh he did not like the verbiage used there.

“I love how you guys all thought to ask me how I felt about this, so very thoughtful of you.” You laughed at the absurdity of it all. 

“Yea, exactly! You don’t even want to be a sweetheart, do you baby girl?” Ryomen asked, fully turning to you. A realization hit you like a truck trying to teleport you to a fantasy world. Something in the way he said baby girl, in how intense he was in fighting against the tittle. Ryomen was jealous. Of course, this was nothing new, but the idea of him being jealous of these guys just felt so absurd to you. You were used to giving into his jealousy, to baby it and tend to it; like a dutiful nurse. Protecting his ego at all cost. Your first instinct was to continue that tradition, but then you thought about it again. He never went out of his way to try and take care of your jealousy. And being a fraternity sweetheart may actually be fun.

“I mean, I am at every single party you guys throw, I might as well be the sweetheart, right?” You smiled and the other guys cheered, even Nanami let out a little whoop! Ryomens eyes looked dark though. He knew exactly what you were throwing in his face. You wanted to say being this petty was unlike you, but since you started dating Ryomen…

“You offered beer pong?” You smiled to Suguru, who gladly took you outside to the table, Satoru tagging along with a reluctant Ryomen dragging behind. 

It had been four months since you first slept with Sukuna, and two months since you got together. Sometimes you questioned that decision. Actually, you questioned it a lot. You questioned if he ever actually wanted to be in a relationship, or just liked the idea of it. If he wanted to have someone stable waiting for him at home while he still got to do what- or who- ever he wanted. The way he talked to some of the girls at these parties made you think that was the case. He talked to them almost as if he forgot he had a girlfriend, or worse, as if he resented the fact he had one.

Which was so unbearably confusing for you! He pursued you so fervently, as if he was convinced you were soul mates. You were happy to keep things casual with him for exactly this reason. He was the one that wanted to take things to the next level, He was the one that made things official, hell- He was the first one to say I Love You! And it’s not like he tried to hide you, he posted you on social media, he took you out as often as he could, that motherfucker tried to get a tattoo of your god damn name! Thank God Suguru talked him out of that one. It didn’t make sense to you that he would be this obsessed with you regularly, but the moment he got a few shots in his system and a cute girl approached him it’s like you were a ghost to him. It made you fucking angry.

The air was warm and full of laughing as you played against Satoru.

“Hey, you have to bounce it, you can’t throw it!” He giggled, trying to swat away your ball.

“Oh, but you can swat it?!” You scoffed through smiles, “Unfair rules!” This was your third round, and he only had one cup left. That being said, he was about half way through yours, and you were definitely starting to feel it. It was actually kinda nice to be thoroughly enjoying a party. To feel like you were here to hang out with your friends and not just to please your man. 

“Come on Satoru, how are you going to lose to someone who’s wasted?!” Suguru laughed, grabbing your elbow to help steady you. You should have known something was wrong when Ryomen didn’t step in. 

“By also being wasted!” Gojo chuckled as he completely missed his shot and you sunk yours. Cheers and hollers erupted in the crowd, and you proudly threw up both hands as you had won again. You felt like a star. Like you were actually cool, and accepted. You felt amazing. You looked over to your darling boyfriend to share the moment with him.

Only to feel every once of warmth leave your body when you saw him talking to another woman. You knew her well, Amanda from your english class. She talked all the time about how hot Ryomen was before the two of you got together, and joked about stealing him after. From the look of that heart wrenching grin he had on while he talked to her, it looked like she had a chance.

“Walk away. Just walk away.” You thought.“Come to me.” She laughed obnoxiously loud at a joke that probably wasn’t even that funny. Even he looked surprised at the reaction he got. Then she got closer. Your body went into rigor mortis as your lungs forgot how to work. “No. Please No.” 

She kissed him. The next three seconds felt like three years. You watched her wrap a hand around his neck and pull him closer, wrap another hand in his hair and you fought vomit. It was a tender act you thought was sacred between the two of you. You guessed not. You ran off, not having the heart to watch anymore. You didn’t see him push her away and onto her ass. You didn’t hear him yell at her.

“What the fuck skank?! Why the fuck would you do that?!” He scoffed, aggressively wiping his mouth. 

“I-I’m sorry! I just thought the conversation was going well, so-”

“So you fucking kiss me?! Do you do that to every man you have a conversation with?!” He physically spat, “You didn’t even fucking ask! Have you never heard of fucking consent?!”

“Look, I thought-!”

“No, you didn’t think of shit! I have a fucking girlfriend, do you know that?! Jesus fucking christ.” He groaned, walking away from the situation to find you.

You were making your way through the house to go home, fighting tears because you’d be damned if these assholes saw you cry. You swam through the sea of drunken bodies swaying in the house. The bass from the music felt all too intense, the lights all too bright. Everything was just too much. You felt disconnected from and all too aware of your body all at once, and all you really wanted was non-existence. 

“Leaving so soon?” Nanami asked from his place on the houses steps as you walked out. He looked up, noticing the tears you had let slip, and his eyes widened a bit. He immediately dropped the asshole act, standing up and placing a concerned hand on your shoulder. “Y/n, are you okay? Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Ryomen is a cheating bastard.” You managed to gasp through choked breath. This whole not crying thing was so much harder than you thought. That didn’t sound like the Ryomen Nanami knew though. The Ryomen Nanami knew didn’t shut up about his girl. He wanted to marry her after graduation, he was trying to build a life with her. He wouldn’t cheat on her. Something wasn’t right.

“Y/n, I’m sorry, but that can’t be right. Theres gotta be a mis-”

“I gotta go Kento.” You whimpered, brushing his hand away. You refused to listen to one of his frat dude friends try to defend him. You took off the R that weighed down on your neck, his claim to you, and handed it to Nanami. You knew you wouldn’t be able to face him again to return it. “Please give that to him, I need to leave.” You muttered, all but running away from the party.

You should have known better. You did know better. You hated that you expected this and still got hurt. Everything just felt so unbearably heavy. When you broke up with your last boyfriend, you just felt numb. You felt about as inconvenienced by it as when they got your order wrong at Mcdonalds. Annoyed, yeah- maybe even pissed off. But ultimately you got over it quick, it had barely hurt your week.

But this? This felt like hell. This felt wrong. Like when a loved one suddenly dies, or if your house burned down while you were away; like the universe was fundamentally broken- turned upside down and left to rot. You felt so fundamentally stupid for giving him a chance. For letting him trick you into thinking he was in anything other than lust. For falling in love with a demon like him. All of the devotion and warmth you held for him tasted so fucking bitter, like it had been preverted and turned into a curse. You wanted to crawl home and tell your mom she was right.

But, your dorm was much closer. “Hey nerd, how was the- oh no.” Mei Mei said, looking up from her laptop as she heard the door open. You looked like a rejected member of Kiss, make up running down your red face, hair a mess from the outside wind. 

“Mei mei, he-” You tried to get it out, but just choked on your words, breaking down into the sobs you were holding back. Mei rushed over to wrap her arms around you and keep you from collapsing in on yourself. 

“Oh sweetheart…I’m so sorry.” She sighed, leading you over to your bed and sitting down with you. She knew what happened without you saying it. She knew it was going to happen. She was mostly just shocked it took this long. 

“I’m so stupid..”

“Yea, a little bit.” She confirmed, patting your back and shushing you as you broke into another sob. Your phone went off. She checked it for you, snarling at the ‘where are you?’ text he sent. That motherfucker had a lot of gaul. She tossed your phone into your desk drawer, then went and grabbed the emergency ice cream she kept in her fancy mini fridge. She joined you on the bed with two spoons and her laptop.

“Okay, what do you wanna watch?” She asked, pulling up netflix.

Meanwhile, Ryomen was losing his mind looking for you, and Nanami was losing his mind looking for him. “There you are!” Kento snapped as he finally found Ryomen coming out of their shared dorm.

“Nanami, have you seen Y/n?” He asked immediately, “I can’t find her, and I’m about to start hitting people about it.” He said, running a nervous hand through his hair. He had never lost you for this long before, and he was really starting to panic now. If anything had happened to you, he was going to make tomorrows nine o’clock news. 

“Yeah, she ran out like an hour ago saying you cheated on her, is that true?” Nanami asked, feeling like he already knew the answer.

“What?!” Ryomen snapped, grabbing Nanami by the shoulders, “Why the fuck didn’t you tell me that an hour ago?!”

“Because I’ve been looking for you for an hour dipshit!” He yelled, pushing Ryomen off, “Answer the question!”

“No it’s not fucking true! Why the hell would I do something that fucking stupid?!” Ryomen scoffed at the very idea of such a thing. He remembered his encounter with Yuki, before the two of you had even become casual partners. The thought of trying to be with another woman made him nauseous then, and that feeling had only intensified as your relationship grew.

“Then why does she think that you did?” Nanami questioned further, trying to get to the bottom of the situation.

“I don’t know! I-” Shit. He didn’t even finish his sentence before the unwanted kiss flooded his memories. A hit from a sledge hammer wielded by Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson would have been softer than the realization that not only did you see the kiss, but thought it was welcomed. Suddenly, he didn't have blood in his veins anymore, only liquid nitrogen. “Oh my god, she saw Amanda kiss me.”

“What?! Ryomen, you said you didn’t che-”

“I didn’t!” He snarled, “She kissed me when I was trying to sell to her. I pushed her off, it was not mutual!” The last thing Suguru and Gojo expected to find when they went to slip off to their room was Nanami and Ryomen fighting in the hall, but, suppose theres a first time for everything.

“Whats going on?” Gojo asked, needing to be in the center of every drama ever.

“Y/n thinks Ryomen cheated on her.” Nanami explained.

“You fucking what?!” Suguru hissed, ready to fight on your behalf.

“I didn’t actually do it!” Ryomen yelled in his own defense. “She saw Amanda kiss me, but I guess missed the part where I yelled at her for assault!”

“Well she’s officially on the ban list.” Satoru stated what everyone else assumed went without saying.

“Wait, where is Y/n now?” Geto asked.

“Home, I assume. It’s where she was going.” Nanami explained.

“I have to go get her.” Ryomen said more to himself than anyone else, attempting to leave before Gojo stopped him.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Satoru asked, “If it just happened, she may not be willing to listen to you yet.”

“No, Ryomen’s right. The longer he lets this sit the worse it’ll get.” Suguru pointed out. “This is something you address immediately.”

“Not necessarily! She may be working it out on her own,” Satoru was being delusional, “I mean, has she broken up with you yet right? Like officially? Cause if not, showing up at her doorstep out of no where may be the end your relationship.” Wait, he had a point.

“No, She hasn’t broken up with me.” Ryomen sighed in almost relief. You two were still together, that ment there was hope. Hope of a conversation, hope to save the future he had built for you two. Maybe all wasn’t lost.

“Yeah, so…about that.” Nanami muttered almost sheepishly as he held up the white gold necklace you had tossed at him. Ryomen felt his soul evacuate his body and the liquid nitrogen in his veins turn into lead. The room was spinning and the only thing he could focus on was the jewels that should have been around your neck. The symbol of your relationship, dangling abandoned from Nanami's fingers. You had left him and he didn’t even know it.

“Shit.” Mai Mai muttered, checking her phone half way through an episode of whatever you had put on. “Shoko got too fucked up and needs a ride home from the bar.” She sighed. You knew what that meant.

“That’s ok,” you managed a smile, “Go make sure she’s safe.”

“Are you going to be okay?” That was a loaded question if you’d ever heard one. 

“Yeah Mei, I’m not gonna like, kill myself or something stupid like that.” You forced a laugh to really sell that you were falling apart. Mei gave a concerned face, but knew that Shoko still needed her help. 

“I’ll be back in like, an hour, ok?” She said as she grabbed her keys, “If you need anything or god forbid he shows up, call me, ok?” She demanded more than asked.

“Okay, I will.” You sighed, waving off your friend as she left. Once alone, you decided you might as well take the opportunity to get into pajamas. You shuffled to your closet, feeling more like a zombie than much else. That was until you opened the door to reveal Ryomens hoodie hanging up with the rest of your clothes. The icy tendrils of despair returned, and despite your better judgment you pulled the old hoodie down.

He had left it here a few weeks back, and you had been snuggling up in it ever since. At the time it was a major comfort, now it was just another thing to return later. Despite yourself, you still hugged it, imaging you were just hugging him goodbye for some closure. You hoped it would help you let go. Instead what happened is you were greeted with his familiar scent, pine and cigarettes, and your eyes started gushing again.

It’s surreal just how many times a heart can break before it shatters. How many times you can watch your boyfriend, who swore oh so many times that you were his one and only, flirt with truly breath taking girls before you finally snap. How many times you can accept the unacceptable before it feels like a full body breakdown, before you’re hiding in your room, crying into his hoodie because despite everything he was still so comforting to your stupid heart that still hadn’t caught up with your brain in terms of relationship status. 

You collapsed onto your bed as you clung to the fabric, wishing it was him. That tonight had never happened, and he was still yours. It was a nice thought. Your pity party was interrupted by what could only be described as a cop knock on your door. It startled a yelp out of you, and almost scared you enough to make you forget you were sad.

“Y/n, please, let me in.” Mother fucker! Why would he think this was a good idea?!

“No Sukuna, I have nothing to say to you.” You snapped, and he cringed on the other side of the door. He hated when you used his last name for him. It made him feel like his father.

“That’s fine! Just let me say what I have to say.” He begged, “Y/n, it’s not what you think.”

The Audacity

How fucking dare he show up to your door with the worlds lamest fucking excuse and expect it to work?! How fucking dare he act like you didn’t have two working eyes! The rage that filled you with pushed you off the bed and to the door, throwing it open just to smack him across the face. His eyes blew wide at the attack. He had never seen you violent before. He kinda liked it.

“You’re a real fucking douche bag, do you know that?!” You snapped, “You spent fucking months trying to get me to agree to be with you, just to do this to me! Do you know how much this hurts?!”

“Y/n, I-!”

“I’m not done!” You shouted, officially pissing off your across the hall neighbor.

“Take it to your dorm, not the hall!” Utahime yelled from behind her door. You growled, but reluctantly pulled him into your room, closing the door behind the two of you.

“You lead me on for fucking months, fucking months, making me think you loved me and wanted to be with me, just for it to turn out to all be a lie! Then, when you realize you fucked up, you turn up at my door with the lamest excuse known to man! What the fuck do you have to say for yourself?!” You hissed, venom dripping for your lips like thick cyanide.

“She kissed me,” He explained, holding up his hands when he saw you open your mouth to argue, “You asked me what I had to say for myself, right? This is what I have to say, just let me talk.” You closed your mouth reluctantly, waiting for him to continue.

“She started talking to me because she wanted to try pot and knew I had some to sell. I sold her an ounce and we kept talking about her fucking major or some shit. Honestly, I don’t even remember what we were talking about, I was just trying to give good customer service. But I guess she was into it, cause out of no where she kissed me. But I didn’t kiss her back, Y/n! I pushed her off of me, I yelled at her that I had a girlfriend, hell, I’m pretty sure I fucking spit on her. You have to believe me Baby, I wanted nothing to do with that!” 

He was talking fast and panicked, and not at all like how he normally spoke. Like he was scared for his life, grabbing his hair and trying to control his breathing. His fear almost transferred to you, but all you really wanted was to hug him, to assure him it was okay. A part of you wanted to deny it all, because that was so much easier than admitting you were wrong and jumped to conclusions. That you let Mei Mei and your mother get into your head. 

But you knew your boyfriend better than that. You knew that this wasn’t the ramblings of a liar, but the ramblings of a desperate man needing to be heard. The honesty in his eyes, the tremble in his normally steady voice. You thought about how Nanami tried to argue with you when you first accused Ryomen. At the time you refused to hear any of it, but Nanami had never been one to bull shit anyone or defend his fraternity brothers shitty actions. And suddenly, your stomach filled with stones as you realized what you had done, what you had almost thrown away. 

“Ryomen,” You muttered, slowly approaching him as if he was a hurt animal.

“I kept looking for you after it happened, I was going to tell you! But you were gone-”

“Ryo,” You tried again to cut through his thoughts, standing close enough now to touch him.

“But then fucking Nanami found me, and he had your necklace, and-” Oh shit, he wasn’t there anymore. You recognized a doom spiral when you saw one. You gently grabbed his cheeks and forced him to look at you. Those puppy dog eyes you fell in love with were wide and full of fear, filling you with a sick dread that made your skin feel far too tight.

“Baby, look at me. You’re getting lost in your head.” You said softly, using your thumb to wipe away a stray tear.

“Y/n, I’m so sorry I-”

“Why are you sorry? You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m sorry I ran away instead of just talking to you about what happened.” You sighed.

“Yea that was kinda hypocritical of you.” He nodded.

“Ryomen.”

“I’m just saying, you’re the one talking about how important communication is.”

“And I apologized, did I not?!” You laughed at the emotional whiplash of it all. He let a small smile slip as he watched. He finally felt like he could breathe again. He pulled you into a tight hug and kissed the top of your head.

“I swear, this love shit’s gonna put me in the ground.” He more gasped than laughed, the crash of his body no longer being in fight or flight mode weighing heavy on him.

“Ain’t that the truth.” You huffed, shaking your head as best as you could against his chest. Your body still hadn’t gotten the memo that things were okay now. Your bones still felt like they were shaking in your skin. He parted enough to hook his finger under your chin, tilting your head up at him. Your heart skipped a beat, taking in how soft he looked in the moonlight fluttering in from your window. He was proof god had favorites. He smiled softly to you.

“I think you’re worth it though.” He whispered, before leaning down and pressing his soft lips to yours. It didn’t matter how many times they two of you kissed, your heart always freaked out about it- like a mega fan in the pit at a concert. Your arms instinctively moved to wrap around his neck, he he took you by the hips, pulling you deeper into the kiss. He bit your lip, and took the opportunity of your soft moan to slip his tongue into your mouth.

Your body started warming back up, his comforting smell putting your panic response to ease. Your nervous system pulsated back to life, sparks flying in your blood waiting to be caught in his inferno. On one hand, it felt almost wrong to be kissing him so soon after the events of the night- like a betrayal of yourself. On the other, your heart craved him like a drug, his affection gave you a high that nothing else could even come close too. You felt like you were spinning and a heat was quickly pooling in your legs that you knew he could take care of. 

One of your hands tangled into his soft pink hair, tugging softly. He took that as his que to pick you up. You wrapped your legs around his hips long enough for him to sit you down on the side of the bed. His kisses moved from your lips to your cheek, to your jaw, to your neck. You moaned softly as he sucked soft bruises into your collar bone.

He pushed you back down on the bed, lowering himself to his knees in between your legs, like a sinner praying for forgiveness at an altar.. You were suddenly pretty thankful you hadn’t gotten around to changing yet. He hiked the dress up around your hips, smiling when he saw the underwear you were wearing.

“Black lace, huh?” He teased, forgetting the past like, hour and a half apparently, “Were you planning this sweetheart?”

“I assure you I did not plan on us breaking up.” You laughed. He did not like that you used the words “Breaking Up” and “Us” in the same sentence. It didn’t affect him they way that it did before. It didn’t fill him with that overwhelming feeling of panic that it had earlier. It didn’t freeze him in place. Instead, it just filled him with white hot rage. Surely you knew better than that, right? You were his, you weren’t going anywhere. “Breaking up” was not an option. He just had to remind you who you belonged to.

“Good thing we didn’t break up.” He said. Before you could protest, he pushed your panties to the side and ran his warm tongue along your folds, earning him a soft, pretty gasp from your lips. He smirked to himself, noticing how wet you were from just kissing, gathering the silky liquor on his tongue, and swirling it onto your clit. He started spelling his nickname with his tongue, R. Y. O, R. Y. O, and you were lost to whatever he wanted.

Your body pulsated with electricity, every swipe of his tongue sending a new wave of bliss through your body. You moaned out his name, fingers tangling into his hair to try and keep yourself grounded. You felt like you were made of pop rocks and stars, eyes rolling back in pleasure, pulling him closer to your core. You could feel a tsunami building inside of you, a sea of pleasure threatening to over take you.

“Have I ever told you how sweet you taste?” Sukuna moaned, sliping two fingers inside of your gushing pussy. You mentally added that to the list of weird compliments you had received since becoming bedfellows with the wannabe bad boy. Or, tried to I should say. As you were filing the thought away, he curled his fingers into your g-spot, turning any coherent thoughts you had had before into oh fuck that felt good and fuck I’m already getting close. Ryomen felt the way your cunt clenched around his fingers, and felt his own dick twitch. He knew how that clench felt around his cock, and more than anything he wanted to feel it again.

 “Ryo, I-I’m...yea” You tried to warn him, but the electric shockwaves going through your body made communication rather difficult at that moment.

“Oh yea?” He chuckled from between your legs, punctuating his sentence with a sharp suck to the bundle of nerves between your legs. “Then cum for me pretty girl.” It didn’t take much after that, his words of affirmation waking up butterflies in your stomach and in your cunt. A few more curls of his fingers and swipes from his tongue and suddenly cartoon stars were exploding in front of your eyes. Your climax tore through you with a vengeance, the storm hitting you and drowning your senses in bliss and oxytocin. Your entire body felt like it had been struck by lighting made of erotic thrill, the aftershocks leaving you shaking in it’s wake.

Your soul was still trying to make it’s way back to your body when his lips met yours again, your taste mingling with his on your tongue and leaving your head spinning. You went to grab his shirt, finding that he had taken it off at some point, which was more than okay with you. He nipped at your jaw and your neck before pulling away and getting you up long enough to take your dress off you. You went to take off your bra, only for him to stop you.

“Hey, hey, whats the rush?” He asked from the foot of your bed, wicked grin showing off his naturally sharp canines, “Take it off slowly.” This was 100% a power play and you know it. Normally this fucker was literally ripping clothes to get them off you quicker, your sudden uptick in panty buying could attest to that. But now all of the sudden he wanted to go slow? Fine, you could play that game. 

You stood on your knees to give him a better view, slowly shimmying the straps off your shoulders. His scarlet eyes burned into your every movement as you slipped your arms out of the straps as elegantly as one could. You made eye contact with him as you unhooked your bra, one hook at a time. Or, tried to at least. His eyes were trained on your chest. You grinned at the aggravated groan he let out, watching you catch the fabric before it fell and revealed your breast. His eyes were dark and you could tell by his shifting his jeans were getting too tight.

“Slow enough for you?” You smirked at him. 

“Keep running that mouth and I’ll give you something to do with it.” He warned, and you just laughed, finally letting your bra drop to the mattress. You saw his body physically tense as to not grapple you then and there.

“You want my mouth? Oh, but I’d much rather have you somewhere else.” You teased, looping your thumbs into the sides of your underwear as you started to pull them off your hips at an agonizing pace. Ryomen felt like he was going to lose it, feeling his fingers, among other extremities, twitch with the need to touch you. He tried to be a good boy, he really did, but when you rolled your hips at him he lost it. In a flash he had pulled you under him, and was fumbling with his belt.

“Hey, what happened to slow?” You teased.

“Fun experiment, not for me.” He responded, freeing himself from his jeans and lining himself up with your still dripping entrance. He caught your lips in a kiss as he dived in, swallowing your sweet moans as he filled you to the brim. It didn’t matter how many times Ryomen was in between your legs, it always felt like the first. The burning stretch as his hips connected with you setting your body on fire and filling your brain with tv static. You could feel your already weak legs tremble around him, and he groaned as your pussy fluttered around his cock. 

“God pretty girl, you feel so fucking good for me.” He moaned, setting a brutal pace as he pushed into you, his cock brushing against your g-spot and massaging your cervix. “Like you were made to be on my cock.” Who he was talking to was a mystery to you because you were not there. You were in outer space, floating on atoms and space dust as he rocked into you, bliss filling your veins as you felt euphoria spread through you and pool in your core. 

He threw one of your legs over his shoulder, letting him dive even deeper into your velvety walls. He grabbed your hips in a vice grip, no doubt leaving bruises you could take finger prints off of. Every thrust hit your g-spot, the new position letting him reach places that you didn’t know existed. “Oh, fuck, Ryo don’t stop.” You begged.

“Didn’t plan on it,” He assured you, watching the way your eyes screwed shut in pleasure. “Hey no-” He growled, removing his hand from your hip to grab your chin, “Look at me.” You whined as you opened your eyes, meeting his lust filled gaze. “Who does this pussy belong to?”

“You Ryomen..” You moaned, feeling yourself reaching your peak.

“Who’s the only person that makes you feel this good?” He demanded the validation.

“You, Ryomen, you!” You squirmed underneath him as all of the stimulation became too much. Your hands started to tingle as your body got ready to tumble off a cliff. You weren’t even fully processing what he was asking, you just knew to say his name.

“Who do you belong to Y/n?”

“Ryomen..” You whimpered, digging your claws in his back as your legs trembled, “Ryo, please..” You gasped, teetering on the edge. His hand left your chin and found your clit, massaging expert circles into it. It was your tipping point, sending you hurtling over the edge of your orgasm and head over heels into euphoria, the sea of bliss overtaking you as red hot lava replaced your blood. You felt almost dizzy as you were hit with wave after wave of ecstasy, vision going blurry with tears from the intensity of it all.

Ryomen wasn’t far behind you, the feeling of your cunt clenching around him, pulling him in deeper and deeper with every convulsion. He told himself he really couldn’t have pulled out even if he wanted to; filling you until you were overflowing and thanking Aphrodite for the invention of birth control. He rolled you over as he collapsed next to you, managing to stay inside. 

The two of you stayed like that for awhile, breathing deep in your afterglow, before he finally pulled out, albeit reluctantly. He kissed the top of your head, fixing his pants and finding a washcloth to clean you up with. “I’d say sorry for the mess but, It’s kinda hot.” He chuckled softly. You rolled your eyes and threw on his shirt.

“Dick.” You muttered. He nodded in agreement.

“Is that a request? I could go again.” He grinned as you weakly hit his arm with your finger tips.

“You’re lucky I love you.” You grumbled softly. He nodded.

“I know…I love you too.” He whispered. He waited a second before adding, “We’re still together, right?” more as a formality than anything.

“No, I slept with you as one final hurrah before deleting your number.” you joked.

“Oh, well then, I guess you won’t be needing this?” He asked, pulling your pendant from his pocket. Your eyes widened a bit as you saw it, almost forgetting that you had ever taken it off to begin with. Your hand instinctively went to your neck to protect it, only to find nothing there. obviously. 

“My necklace-” You said, but he shook his head.

“Nope, my necklace. Unless you wanna be my girlfriend?” He smirked that evil smirk. You laughed fondly at him, then gave an overly exaggerated sigh.

“Well I suppose, if it’s the only way to get my jewelry back, then we gotta get back together.” He chuckled as he hooked the chain around your neck again, admiring the way it dazzled against your skin.

“It looks good on you.” he praised, kissing your forehead. 

“Everything looks good on me.” You winked.

“WHAT HAPPENED TO CALLING ME IF HE SHOWED UP?!” Mei yelled as she finally returned home.

・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・ Taglist ・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・

@risuola @grimreaqueer @baji-keisukes-wife @aliensbelieveinme-blog1 @marenalee @ryosuku

[revelboo]

Everything is Alright pt 9

Starscream x reader- sulking

• You have no idea what to make of your visitor or the way you’re being stared at like an especially frustrating puzzle missing pieces at the very end. Still cradling you in a huge hand, that helm tilts down to look at your cage. A slightly disgruntled rumble buzzes through his big frame as he turns toward the door as if in expectation.

• Exhausted, Starscream rolls his shoulders to work the kinks out. It wasn’t that patrolling was hard- if anything it was processor meltingly boring. Letting himself in his quarters only to rock to a stop, because Soundwave is right there. Holding the human in a hand. Waiting. That faintly glowing visor staring in accusation as Starscream’s wings flick up aggressively. This isn’t Skywarp and lashing out will have repercussions, though. Dragging his optics away from the small form in Soundwave’s grip like he doesn’t care less, he stalks past the other mech. “I hope you have a good reason to be in my personal quarters,” he sneers.

• What? You’d honestly expected another violent outburst, but your captor doesn’t seem to care that this mech has you. Making that low, non-sound, the boxy mech drifts over to the desk Starscream’s settled himself at. You’re gently deposited on the surface before Soundwave points almost accusingly at your cage. “Inadequate.”

• And with that, he just leaves. Starscream stares, waiting for the door to close behind Soundwave before hooking a servo around your waist to tug you closer. It’s the same cautious, worried examination as when he’d rescued you from Skywarp and your heart softens a bit more, because he’s worried. Even if he’s never going to admit it. You lay a hand on his servo, again amazed how someone so huge and dangerous can be so gentle. “I’m okay.”

• He draws back slowly almost seeming embarrassed at being caught caring, optics flicking to your cage then away. “I just don’t like for my things to be broken,” he says, voice gruff as those wings lift even higher. Defensive and maybe annoyed at himself.

• The words are a reminder to not just him, but you it seems. You’re- what? A pet to him? Definitely not an equal and you’ll never be. Not a friend. He only cares because he’s decided you’re his. His possession. It hurts all the same even as you blame that ache on Stockholm’s. After all, he’s hardly your friend, he’s your jailer. You push his servos away, backing away and turning your back on him because your eyes are burning now.

• Surprised, Starscream’s hand freezes still outstretched as you pace to the far side of the desk. Turning your back on him. Ignoring him. His fingers slowly curl into a fist as anger trickles in. But he doesn’t move and neither do you. Slowly, the fury drains away to leave only that awful silence that weighs him down. Why does he even care? You belong to him, his little, trapped bird.

• But he prefers you smiling, agreeing with him, and asking about his day. Growling, he reaches to snag you, feeling your little hands grab at his servos. Your face whips around to stare at him and there’s anger there with the fear. Denta grinding as his jaw works, he sets you down again in front of him, laying both arms on either side of you in the pretense of using the keyboard embedded in the top and effectively trapping you.

• Well, then. You can’t even sulk in peace, apparently. It’s almost tempting to try and climb over his arm to retreat back to the far side of the desk just for spite. Or walk across his weird, alien-glyph keyboard while he works just like the cat he thinks you are. Annoyed, you sit down crosslegged and wait.

• Still ignoring him. Attention divided between his console and the human now partially sprawled out, their chin propped on their fist staring anywhere but at him, he vents. “If you’ll stop acting like an entitled sparkling, I might consider taking you outside to see the stars.”

• It’s almost comical how quickly you twist around to stare up at him. Even as he fights to keep from smiling, there’s a feeling of almost guilt that makes him look around and really see his empty, gray quarters. It’s never bothered him, because he doesn’t dwell on it, but he remembers making things just for the joy of working with his hands. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to find you something to do when you’re left alone. “But I swear to Primus if you try and run off, I will put a leash on you,” he adds with a growl, punctuating the threat with a thump of his fist against the desk as you grin up at him.

Previous Next

[godimus]

Transformers requests??? Yes boyyyyyyyyyyy

Could I get a Transformers One triangle between D-16 and Orion with a cybertronian reader who’s been with them through it all 🙏🙏

They’re struggling to choose who to side with cause while violence isn’t always the answer…. Sentinel definitely deserves it, but also (post everything going down) their friends have completely changed and they’re almost unrecognisable.

If you wanna play on possessiveness for D-16 as well cause they’re the only bot who understands what he’s going through and sees his reasoning.

And protectiveness for Orion cause this is his lov- friend, and he can’t let them go down the path D is going down cause he’ll lose another person.

Ending up to you though, I’ve just been desperate for some love triangle mess between my boys 🙏🙏

Orion Pax X Gender Neutral! Reader X D-16

I can't believe this, you're actually my first request ever! I genuinely hope that I did a decent job at this fic.. I hope you like it, enjoy :D !!

“You can’t walk away and act like nothing happened, D, you could’ve gotten us hurt, you could’ve gotten them hurt badly.”  The dazzling lights of the lively city in the darkness of Cybertron reflected on the blue helm of the gentle bot as he spoke in a worried tone, visibly on edge from having to save his most precious companions from getting caught by the guards.

“Just when I thought I could rely on you, you just had to screw it up.” A dangerously low mumble escaped the dermas of the furious bot, fiery orange optics darkening as vivid images of his once adored idol annihilating Cybertron’s glorious Primes. “What do-“ “I wish you could see like me, like them, Orion, but no, you still don’t get it.”

I knew that this would happen, I could see it a klik away, it was indeed inevitable. It correlates to mixing two significantly incompatible substances and anticipating a low-risk outcome. I happened to be the third, more counterbalanced substance in this demonstration.

I cautiously approached the taller bot from behind, the moment my servo touched him, a quiet stillness settled between us, the usual hum of his systems slowing as if my presence alone could calm the storm inside him.. I could feel his stiffened frame relaxing under my digits and his ex-vents releasing a kept huff.

“Don’t be so hard on him, D. You know he cares more than you’ll ever admit... maybe even more than I should.”  I whispered, close enough that only D could hear me, my optics have found themselves on Orion, who seemed to be watching me. D’s optics softening to a certain degree yet displaying a puzzled look, like an internal conflict occurring between seeking vengeance and lowering his defensive walls to his friends, and yet, in that single, silent moment, it was clear that beneath the fury was something raw, something almost vulnerable, and I couldn’t help but feel the weight of his trust in me.

“This doesn’t change anything. It doesn’t change our reality, everything I knew was a lie.”  Frustration boiling up once again at the core of his frame as he choked out the last part while balling his servos into a fist. “I should’ve known..”

I glanced back at Orion, his optics were looking at the distance, deep inside his thoughts. “Sentinel is indeed good at many things, deceiving Cybertron is certainly his leading trait” “If I could only get my fingers around his ventilation cables-“ Narrowed blue optics studying the facial plate of his furious friend as he spouts threats, guilt eating him up from letting his friend end up in this state.

“I’m sorry, D, but this is not a proper way to handle our situation.” Protesting firmly and holding his ground,Orion’s optics darted to the quiet bot before gazing back at D-16. “Can you blame him? Can you blame any of us for wanting to take matters into our own hands...? we can’t live like this for eternity, there are more of us than meets the eyes, right, Orion? You said that yourself.” Something glinted in D’s optics as he gawked at the third bot, a whirling sound leaving his vents, a tingling sensation enveloping his.. spark?

“We can seek justice, not destruction.” “I don’t want justice.” D gritted through his dentas.

“It’s a very violent path you’re choosing, my friend, and I cannot allow you to involve them in your reckless plans and risking their safety.” The air around them tightened, the silver bot’s flaming optics glaring right back at the calm, yet firm ones of Orion’s. “I would never let anything happen to them-“ he turned to me “-so long you stick to my side.” He stated quietly, seeming gentler when his attention was on me, and if I hadn’t been with him for so long, I wouldn’t have noticed that subtle pleading look on him, was he begging for me to stay? My spark pulsed irregularly under his gaze, and though I tried to stay calm, something in the way his optics darkened when he looked at me stirred feelings I hadn’t yet dared to name.

I felt a touch on my shoulder plate, it was firm, but there was a tenderness in the way his servo lingered, sending a warmth through my frame I hadn’t felt in cycles and turning me around. “This is bigger than any of us. I won’t force you to stay, but you must choose wisely.”  His unwavering, yet tender grip on me made me forget about my worries for a moment, looking deep into my eyes. “I promise to fix all of this.”  He comforted in a deep, rumbling voice.

“I know you will, Orion.” I gave him a fragile smile, placing my servo on top of his and giving a light squeeze. His unceasingly furrowed optical ridges' finally relaxed and softer by my touch.

“I can’t believe this, even you? You don’t get to do this to me!” A roaring voice came behind Orion, a wide-open hot optics staring right through me, “I trusted you! I trusted both of you!” He yells frantically while moving towards me and with each step his optics radiate an intense color.

“D.” A warning voice came from the figure in front of me, shielding me from the raging bot as he stomped towards us. “Don’t do something you’ll regret.” For a moment, I forgot about the two bots in front of me bickering and the tension rising severely, our memories together and the bond we shared had perhaps reached its peaking point.

I went around the protectiveness hold of Orion’s and stepped closer to the infuriated bot. “You’re right, D, but I also can’t watch you destroy yourself.”  The words hung in the air; D went silent momentarily while watching me with a puzzled look. “But Sentinel… he’s the one responsible for all of this. He deceived us all.” He said in confusion.

Orion, ever the calm figure, stepped forward. “And we will stop him. But not like this.” “Stopping him isn’t enough. I will kill him.” He growled; the tension reached its peak as D-16 stood daringly. “Then leave, for the sake of our memories that we’ve lived together.” Orion stated, but through the composure he carried, I could see sorrow in the electric blue optics of his. “I will never forget this.” D-16 hissed darkly before taking a good look at me until he turned to walk away, and for good.

“This is too much for me..” I murmured while absently looking at the ground. “It was prone to happen,” Orion was now facing me, his broader torso blocking the view of the retreating bot. Gentle blue servos, almost as big as my helm, cupping my face and rubbing it comfortably. “But it will be alright, because I’m going to be here for you through it all.”

[throwingawayhailstones]

Some interesting thoughts on Sonic's ideals (particularly in IDW)

*hides behind a fallen tree*

I honestly really like how he's portrayed in IDW. People harp on his morals and all that but I think the writers are trying to say something about people who have his mindset.

Sonic wants everyone to have the freedom to change. He prefers to spare his enemies when he has the choice and wants to save people because he's a good guy. Though it's clear he won't get too hung up if someone dies because of their own actions (see: Starline. Also the end of unleashed and forces. Sonic had no reason to think Eggman survived and was cool with it. Like he won't actively go out of his way to confirm a kill is what I'm saying). The problem with this is what if they don't ever choose to change? Sonic wants Metal to come around like Omega. He doesn't have to be a good guy perse but like maybe stop trying to kill him on sight and stop plotting you know? But we all know as long as Eggman exists that can't happen because he'll just reprogram Metal. And Eggman. He doesn't exactly "spare" Eggman but since he doesn't go out of his way to like kill him, despite being fully able to, Eggman can get back up and terrorize more people.

This leads to people like Surge and Kit and Lanolin who were deeply and personally hurt by Eggman (Starline came from Eggman) and blame Sonic because he's the one who has the power to stop him but doesn't take the initiative.

See the thing is, Sonic can only justify letting them go because he knows he'll just stop him the next time they shows up. He says this explicitly when he lets Metal go. He can go around with this confidence because he is strong. What about the normies? People like Lanolin? They don't get to do that because they aren't powerful. That's why they have shit like "jail".

We see how important being powerful is to Sonic's beliefs in the Metal Virus arc. Suddenly he can't whisk people out of harm's way. He can't spindash through his problems. You see his confidence crumble and you see him venting his frustrations at Eggman and Metal. You see him actually threatening to basically kill Eggman by infecting him.

He does understand why people don't like him and why they find his ideals frustrating. He's been in enough rough spots to empathize. He just believes that he's fast enough to deal with fallout.

He also isn't directly "forcing" anyone to adhere to his ideals. He believes in freedom so people have the freedom to disagree even if he doesn't like the outcome (see: metal). The problem is because of the scale (see: forces) people have to deal with the collateral damage. People have the freedom to change so you gotta deal with Eggman firebombing you crops every few months because you live too close to his base sorry bestie. Sonic is fast enough to save the day but because he's a *reactive* force rather than a *proactive* one, theres always going to be victims.

This reactive thing also funnily enough mirrors boost gameplay lmao

Will he change? No, probably not. But he'll def get tossed around the blender a few more times.

[l-in-the-light]

Facing your own abyss in Silent Hill 2

Every save point is a red square. Looking at it is painful it's like... someone's... groping around my skull. Every hole James jumps into...

...is a square. The tv at the big reveal is an old crt one with a square screen.

Even the bathroom's mirror at the very beginning of the game is a square. Who cares about a bathroom's mirror, right? But the whole game starts with James staring at himself, into that mirror. He's staring at himself. Staring into the abyss. His mind is his own abyss. We've been looking at it the whole time, from the very start of the game.

"He who is not bold enough to be stared at from across the abyss is not bold enough to stare into himself. The truth can only be learned by marching forward."

James starts the game by staring at himself. He's not afraid of death. He thinks he wants to find out the truth, because things don't make sense to him, he can't understand anything, but he feels something is wrong.

But at the last save point, James looks away from the abyss. He was not ready to find out everything. He doesn't want to look into himself even deeper. He's afraid of what he can find. Please stop staring at me, I don't want for you to look into myself. I don't want to see any more.

A hot take: there's nothing wrong with that. Sometimes it might be better not to stare too long. Heck, it takes so much courage to do that. Many, many people would rather continue their lives by holding false ideas about oneself, choosing safety over feeling uncomfortable. It's a very human thing to do. Just sometimes you don't get that choice and you can't live normally unless you not only stare back, but also jump right into that abyss. It will be terrifying, you might find things you wish you never knew, you might find out nothing of what happened to you was ever your fault, but it won't make you feel any better anyway. It's when you're at your limit that you're literally forced to face it, when you buried what made you uncomfortable so deep that you feel overwhelmed and numbed, and you don't even understand why - because you hid the reasons. Or you can just run away. Some would prefer death over the truth.

This can happen because of our mental health crashing down. Unresolved traumas, feelings, belittling our own pain, trying to fit a circle into a square hole, unbelonging.

Ultimately, it doesn't even matter what is James' personal struggle, because anyone can relate to this in some ways. You can't escape abyss for forever, we've all been there and we all will be jumping into abyss again, and again.

But this has to be said, I'm sorry not sorry:

Sometimes you will get lost in your abyss to the point you will project your own issues on other people. It's a way to make you feel more secure, safe, when you tripped over some uncomfortable truth. Because you normalize it and it can't be overwhelming anymore if everyone can relate to it, in other words: you try to belittle the problem so that the "uncomfortable feeling" goes away. It becomes normal, familiar, tamed, nothing to be afraid of as the result. But is it really fair towards the people you did the projecting on? You're not helping them or respecting them if you just throw your own issues at them like that. And this applies to Silent Hill fandom as a whole, actually, because:

Every Silent Hill game (even the bad ones, even freaking Ascension) and movie: *shows clearly that the story is about PTSD, characters suffer from symptoms and hallucinations, are triggered by sounds, suffer from victim blaming etc.*

Every second fan on reddit: James is just sexually frustrated, he doesn't have any trauma, and even if he has one it doesn't matter, what are you talking about?! You're reaching! Everything is horny and sexy in this game, my interpretation is CANON! The town is evil and it punishes James and Eddie because they're bad people! Angela did a bad thing but didn't deserve it btw.

This is mostly me venting a bit, feel free to dislike it, but I need to get it off somewhere and I decided: tumblr it is.

Like, literally, all Silent Hill series entries share a theme of PTSD, but some people will go to extreme lengths to deny it and call it "reaching" WHILE saying "sexual frustration is canon". Alessa suffers from PTSD in SH1, James, Eddie and Angela suffer from it in SH2, freaking Heather, Claudia and even Douglas suffers from it in SH3, Henry and Walter in Silent Hill 4, Travis in Origins, Alessa in the movie, Heather in the movie, Cheryl in Shattered Memories (she's even in a therapy, come on, get a clue!), Alex in Homecoming, Murphy in Downpour etc. etc. etc. They all went through a trauma, Silent Hill reflects their traumatic experiences (that they don't want to remember!), they have to face their triggers putting them through the traumatic event again and again, and then delusions attemping to lull the mind into a fake sense of comfort. Their monsters are the delusions, not their horny desires!

Btw if you see your monsters as horny creatures, then maybe you're understanding it all wrong. It's supposed to be a delusion or fear, if you're horny and just want to hump things and that's why everything you see is sexy, then it's definiely not something you actually fear, and if it is, then I think you have bigger issues to deal with than sexual frustration here.

That being said, the creature monster designer, Masahiro Ito, called those monsters "delusions". Delusion is something that isn't an accurate representation of a concept in your mind. Delusion is far removed from reality. You want to believe a lie, because you can't handle the truth.

Now, if monsters are showing your sexual frustration that you don't want to admit you have, then they should be dressed like nuns instead. You want to deceive your mind, you want to believe you're not *that* horny and are faithful to your one and only, you can't handle the possibility that you're thinking of having an affair on the side.

Let's unpack this monster (Abstract Daddy/Ideal Father), having all of the above in mind:

It's a surreal creature consisting of two people, it has two heads and two mouths. And it's not literally showing intercourse like so many in "sexual frustration is canon" camp are claiming. Because that would be *a literal representation*, not a delusion. You would literally be seeing what happened, forcing you to face it in it's full horror and that can't make you believe in a lie (remember, the idea is that: you can't handle the truth, your mind is creating a delusion to calm you down). It's a self-defense mechanism fighting back against the trauma. You need to get rid of that delusion so you can face what actually happened!

There's one more description of Abstract Daddy in Japanese that is never truly translated into english. It's おぶさったとおちゃん (obusatta tōchan), loosely it means something like "piggyback daddy"; a dad carrying a child on their shoulders/back. Now look at the creature again. It looks like a smaller person is clinging to a bigger one, if you consider that the whole frame belongs to the person on the bottom and is "their body". Perhaps the door/bedframe person is carrying the smaller one on top of itself, but since the child is heavy/older now the frame ends up bending towards the ground. It's an image of a dad carrying his child.

Kinda like this (Inu Yasha is here just to illustrate the concept). That's why the limbs are hanging loosely like that on the monster's design.

Wait a moment, but why is the frame so big under the top person? It doesn't look like part of a body at all. That's because of the subjective perspective. When you're a small child, your dad looks especially big to you. When you cling to his back, you feel like it's so broad, strong and big; so big your hands won't meet when you embrace him. And most importantly, makes you feel safe and secure, because a father should protect his child. I could swear I even read lines like that in mangas or heard them in movies before, because that's definitely not my own impression there I thought up on my very own.

In order to see the truth that your parent was an abuser, you need to get rid of that "safe and secure" feeling of delusion you're experiencing. The monster is wrapped in cloth btw to obscure the truth, what you see on the surface is incorrect, the truth is trapped underneath (and if you want to, then NOW is the moment to jump to your intercourse thoughts or draw a parallel to Mary on sickbed. Let's call it an extra layer to this monster). Literally uncovering it would be the very definition of a horror.

Extra thought: the monster attacks James like it wants to protect Angela from the possible stranger (what an Ideal Father should do, indeed). Makes the whole scene afterwards have a lot more sense too, with Angela calling James a disgusting pig who is also only after "one thing". She considered James a threat, but it wasn't a conscious fear until the defeat of the monster. Next time they will meet, Angela starts to mistake James as her mom instead, so the whole paranoid delusion of James being a threat (because he's a male and males became her PTSD trigger) got dissolved and it's the result of Abstract Daddy's defeat. Angela now knows who was the real threat.

Finally, after 10+ years I solved the mystery of Abstract Daddy. You're welcome if you enjoyed the ride. I don't even like this monster's design all that much (I find Mandarins way cooler). But this isn't the end. If Abstract Daddy is a delusion, it means all the other monsters are also delusions and HIDE the truth, not "expose" or "manifest" it in straightforward manner. Only getting rid of them by unwrapping the actual thing underneath will lead you towards truth, believing the surface level will leave you delusional. There's still a lot to unwrap about the 9 delusions of James.

Yes, Abstract Daddy is how the monster looks like for James. We never knew how it looked like for Angela. Just the name alone suggests James has some trauma related to his father as well, which is a link that connects James to Angela.

And you know what, it's fine if you thought all this time that James is just sexually frustrated. I don't know how you can explain to yourself the fact that he needs to fight the sexy creatures instead of being overjoyed he can "'get some" finally. I thought that's how touch starvation works? But even if you somehow projected your own fears onto James it's alright. You just caught a glimpse of your own abyss and maybe you're not yet ready to stare back at it. We all keep doing those mistakes. It's just human.

Yes, of course me too. Why else do you think it took me 10+ years to solve this mystery? And it's only a start of it, we barely made it under the surface of this iceberg. But I feel like most Silent Hill fans aren't even remotely interested in any interpretation that opposes "sexual frustration" angle, especially now after Masahiro Ito denied that's it's not a canon interpretation, yeeting it back to "headcanon" category where it always belonged.

Yes, sexual themes are there in the game to make you uncomfortable, but if you know the sources of inspiration (Jung), then you know the uncomfortable levels get much deeper than your post-pandemic touch starvation. Maybe you're not ready or not interested to go that far and it's alright. I'm actually not so sure I'm ready to face the deepest depths of James's abyss myself. It both fascinates and terrifies me. We might have to go full Lynch on Silent Hill 2 and realize that nothing is what it actually seems.

Link to my previous interpretation essay on Silent Hill 2, in case anyone is interested (it's about merging of Otherworlds): https://www.tumblr.com/l-in-the-light/765829615005597696.

[lolokouhm]

PRETTY PLEASE? pt.I

Out of all humans walking on this Earth, Satoru Gojo might be the most impatient one.

The clock seems to have stopped the moment you walked out of his apartment, and despite his efforts to make the time flow at least a tiny bit faster, he’s miserable. That’s not how the night was supposed to go - he had plans, and one thing about Satoru is that he hates when his plans end up in ruin. This time though, there is only one person he can blame, and that is himself. It’s not your fault that when you were telling him about the girls’ night you had planned weeks ago with your besties, he was dozing off, playing with those tiny buttons on your favourite shirt. He couldn’t help himself - there was something so mesmerising about the act, and Satoru got invested.

He’d very much prefer to get invested in anything involving you than to sit alone in his apartment, waiting for you to call. At least you asked him to pick you up after you’re done - otherwise, he’d be sulking for weeks. He’s sulking now, laying on the bed, frustrated and alone, scrolling through every possible social media you use. At least there’s a tiny chance he’ll get a glimpse inside of the party you’re at, right? Wrong. You seem to be doing that on purpose, as there’s no new content for him to indulge in and sulk over even more. Satoru knows you’re the type of person who loves to overshare on the internet, so the current silence is quite suspicious. He’s trying his best not stress over it, as he swore he wouldn’t text and call, but his inner demon is really starting to sweat over it. He sighs. It’s so frustrating. Your relationship is a rather fresh subject and there were some areas of it that you haven’t really explored, but he was more than ready to do it tonight. To set the record straight - and after weeks of dating, movie nights and cook-offs in your apartment to officially ask you to become his girlfriend. 

The thought of his perfect night with you yet again pops in his head as he drops the phone on the bed, trying to shake the uneasiness. In normal circumstances, he’d have you wrapped around his finger after a week, throw a random sentence that would suggest you’re a couple from now on and be done, but when it comes to you, nothing seems normal. Not his heart rate. Not his sex drive. Not his thoughts. If love’s a war, then he’s not the brightest soldier on the battlefield - it seems like everything about him is ruthlessly occupied by you.

Even his speed. It’s abnormal, how fast he’s picking the phone up when a notification from you finally appears on his screen. Satoru rushes to his car, excitement filling up his entire being to the point where the speed limits become relatively unimportant - even if he gets a fine, he would have more than enough to pay for that. There’s only one thing that’s priceless, and that is, time. To be exact - time with you, which he has a severe shortage of, no matter for how many hours he’s blessed to be in you presence. Even infinity seems like not enough.

His sufferings have finally come to an end, as Satoru has already parked in your bestie’s driveway. He takes out his phone and texts you „I’M HEREEE” with a million of random emojis, and then slowly leans his head on the cold window glass. From the pieces of information he’s managed to pull out from the darkest places of his memory, it seems like these girls’ nights are an annual thing that happen when one of your closest friends comes back to the city once in a while - she’s been studying overseas for the past few years, but your girlfriends and you are very serious about friendship and do everything in your power to keep it alive and kicking. The effort you put in the relationship pays off - you always have your girls to talk to, vent and cry, and they have you. He grins unconsciously. Another thing Satoru loves about you. You’re just such a sweetheart.  

He observes the entrance, waiting for you to finally come out. It’s past 1 a.m and the whole neighbourhood seems to be sleeping. Satoru rolls the windows down a bit and as the freezing, but nicely refreshing air hits him, his eyes light up when he picks up a faint sound of your voice coming from the house. And then, just moments later, the doors open wide and a familiar shape emerges. Satoru instinctively fixes himself on the seat and brings both of his hands on the wheel, just to tighten his grip on them as you slowly come out from the shadows. He finally can see you, in your whole glory, when the light coming from one of the reflectors catches your frame.

You are so fucking cute.

Satoru’s smile grows bigger and bigger until it almost doesn’t fit his face. Cute is a perfect word to describe your whole being - incredibly wholesome, bright, at the same time dumb in some ways and extremely knowledgeable in the others. And tonight, Gojo Satoru is set on making you officially his. 

He’s ready to go out and open the passenger’s door for you, but you’re faster, even though your legs feel slightly wobbly as you almost sprint to his car, determined to run away from autumn cold. You grip the handle and suddenly you’re welcomed by cozy warmth and Satoru’s overwhelming scent. 

„Toru!”, you exclaim, basically throwing yourself into his open arms, giggling non-stop. The white-haired man in the driver’s seat grabs you instantly, hugging you tightly in his arms and you hide your face in his torso. You’re home.

He’s home.

„Hi, princess. I missed you so, sooo much”, he coos, not really paying attention to the fact that your body twisted in this awkward position may be activating some car options that he has no idea exist. You fit into his frame perfectly and that’s all that matters. 

„Toooru”, you purr into his hoodie, words barely audible. He raises his hands from your waist to cup you chin and kiss you, but you’re faster - you sit up properly, making a place for yourself right on his lap. You slowly raise your head and then - Satoru notices. Your flushed cheeks. Your shiny eyes. Your adorable smile.

And then you drop it.

„Toru, I need you to fuck me. Please?” 

masterlist ❤️

this will get a part two, it's just been sitting in my drafts for so long I had to post it haha based on a drabble I wrote some time ago. prepare for subby gojo I guess

[beneath-a-moonlit-lake]

It's really boring and annoying to see Jiang Cheng's personality being reduced to nothing more than a bog-standard tsundere in this fandom. No, I don't think that some readers are evil for favouring flawed and 'unlikeable' characters. I have been a proud and unapologetic villainfucker in other fandoms. But I do think that their insistence on turning this character with a shitty personality into a sad misunderstood woobie comes at the cost of erasing the story's study of the ways that abuse can be inflicted and perpetuated even by people who are 'nice' and 'friendly' to each another.

Jiang Cheng is not a tsundere or a misunderstood woobie who just struggles to show that he cares. That character type is only hostile and verbally unpleasant on the surface. Jiang Cheng is a mess of classism, entitlement and abuse hiding under a veneer of friendship. The friendship is what exists on the surface level, not the hostility. He did some good things for WWX (such as rushing to rescue him from the Xuanwu's cave), but the underlying potential for abuse was already there even during their teenage years.

It's not that Jiang Cheng has never suffered or that he deserved to be left without his family, but JC has arguably received more restitution for his suffering that any other character apart from LWJ, who only received his happy ending after WWX returned to life via the completely unexpected sacrifice of Mo Xuanyu.

JC's parents were killed by the Wen? JC was able to avenge them via the Sunshot Campaign and rebuild the clan after the war. He lost his golden core by taking the risk to lead Wen soldiers away from WWX? Well, he received a new one shortly after (via WWX's sacrifice, but he doesn't know that and doesn't need to bear that guilt until the end of the story). Jiang Yanli was killed by a trigger-happy kid during the confrontation at Buyetian? That kid died in WWX's rampage, and JC got to lead the Siege on the Burial Mounds to kill almost every member of the surviving Wen clan and watch WWX destroy himself.

Would it have been better if none of these terrible things happened? Yes, obviously. And it's fine if JC continues to feel the burden of the loss. But why has he never found an ounce of peace in the long years after WWX's death? It's because he holds WWX responsible for everything instead of placing any of the blame where it belongs.

Xue Yang and JGY mock him for being obsessed with WWX, and they are completely right to do so!

WWX is Jiang Cheng's emotional punching bag for everything that has not gone right in his life. When JC feels stressed, miserable or threatened, WWX is the person who gets kicked under the bus to attend to JC's needs. Even after JGY's complicity has been revealed, even long after Wen Ruohan is dead, even after the full extent of Jin Guangshan's awfulness and scheming and the ways in which the cultivation world and JC himself enabled that awfulness has been revealed, JC still makes it a point to scream about WWX's debt to his family. He makes it clear that he still holds WWX responsible for things that clearly were not and never would have been his fault, such as the deaths of his parents. Jiang Cheng believes, and still at some level, continues to believe even after the confrontation at Guanyin Temple that he is owed the right to demand that level of unwarranted responsibility for WWX.

And Jiang Cheng is thankfully, not a monster like Jin Guangshan. But this entitlement is not that far off from what JGS used to expect of JGY. WWX is still expected to set aside his needs, to soothe and bolster his bad moods, to cut out parts of himself to restore JC if necessary, and yes, to endure physical abuse (2 strangling attempts, physical blows to help JC vent his frustrations and endless whippings from both Madame Yu and JC).

The loss of the dogs was not a sacrifice that JC made to put up with WWX. WWX was meant to be a replacement for the dogs, and it clearly shows in the expectations that JC had of him.

----

And if you consider the argument that JC just had to slander WWX as someone who turned to evil once he left for the Burial Mounds in order to protect his clan/family as a legitimate argument, you'd have to believe that JC has never considered WWX to count as clan or family, which just makes him look even worse (unless you start twisting WWX's character to make him a traitorous troublemaker, which he very much is not).

[bloodmoon24]

Hello. Hope I am not a bother to you by ANY means whatsoever, but I just came here to vent about some vivzie stuff that is just so bothersome to me that I need to let it out. Just a heads-up for that the main trigger warning in this topic is about misogyny and sexual abuse/assault/rape.

I've been a Vivziepop fan as long as I can remember--I loved her webcomic Zoophobia along with her other works that I've always been familiar with. She was my favorite artist and she has always been an inspiration for me.

However, when it came to being one of her many beloved fans, you can't IMAGINE on what I had to witness in terms of the sheer amount of hatred that has been spat at Vivienne. Especially when it came down to her releasing Helluva Boss and Hazbin Hotel--and the amount of things "critics"/antis say about her is just downright insane and unreal.

During these past few weeks, after someone had leaked s2 of HH, all of the antis and critics watched it and began to ridicule Vivzie, saying that they lost hope and it has lost redeeming qualities of the show; including being so straight up hating her to the point that it feels like I was reading a blog of a person who was sexist to women publically. It honestly blows my mind completely that this is how people treat creators and their shows SO disrespectfully that it is just straight up hate. Not to mention the takes these antis have about Vivzie that is SUPER stupid.

Mind you, Vivziepop is a bisexual Latin-American woman--while I, myself, am a nonbinary (AFAB) mixed PoC fan. And the way antis are like "Hellaverse is racist/sexist/lgbtq-phobic!!" makes me SO made cuz they are erasing the fact that it was MADE by a woman who is a part of the queer community who is WoC. So saying that Hellaverse is an oppressive/prejudice show is WAAAAAY out of proportion.

Also, I still remember how after "Masquerade" was shown along with Stolas being revealed he is a victim of spousal/domestic abuse, a lot of people (and by people I mean antis/critics) were all hating on Angel Dust and Stolas and saying that Vivzie fetishicizes rape/abuse. But for Angel Dust, it was because he's "not an actual victim of SA" because he's a sex worker and because he's hypersexual along with other things; while people defend Stella (the abuser) and say Stolas deserves his abuse because he cheated on Stella. And I cannot tell you how much I had to force myself as to NOT throw up by this statement.

I am a victim of SA because of an ex-girlfriend and also my cousin's boyfriend forced himself on me; my dad divorced my ""mom"" because she would constantly beat him and verbally scream at him--a related mention, too, that my younger siblings are the results of my "egg donor" forcing herself on my dad (I love my siblings VERY much--and I only think of them as JUST my siblings and not by-products of rape). My best friend, Aaron, was assaulted by an older boy in a psychiatrict hospital. And I know other friends of mine who are hypersexual due to various reasons--with one of them being from sexual trauma.

It sickens me a lot that ppl can SAY stuff like that--when, a while back, Vivziepop LITERALLY stated she was a victim of abuse in a tweet of hers. And after the fourth episode of HH, Sam Haft (the guy who created our favorite music) also revealed, too, he is a victim. Many people, victims of assualt/rape, cope with their trauma in many ways--but it boggles me how others of SA will hate on other SA victims because of the way they cope differently than others. We all have different stories and different ways to comfort ourselves.

On a related topic, too, but it also just frustrates me that when Vivzie takes on the topic of abuse, its apparently "romanticizing" and "fetishicizing" when its LITERALLY not and she took this topic seriously. Also, as a reminder, but Family Guy did the same topic on this, too, but it was half-assed and victim-blamed. In the episode "Screams of Silence: The Story of Brenda Q.", it was about Quagmire finding out his sister was being abused by her boyfriend--however, when the main cast came to confront about how Jeff (the abusive boyfriend) was beating her, they said that it was HER fault she was getting abused. But did this episode receive backlash? Only little. But this honestly JUST says a lot about how treat creators--female and male. If Vivziepop was a dude, it would've been different.

Not to mention, too, that when I was seeing a bunch of hate to Helluva Boss, they were all blaming Vivziepop. Just Vivziepop, Vivziepop, Vivziepop EVERYWHERE. But what about Brandon Rogers, a gay PoC man who LITERALLY wrote Helluva Boss AND created Stolas, does HE receive hate?? Nope, just Vivzie. Its just misogyny--when a man does edgy jokes (and saying language that contains LOTS of cursing/swearing) its cool and funny, but when a woman does it she's being uncool and unfunny.

Whoof. Sorry about giving you a wall of text, I REALLY needed to let this out due to all of the hate I was seeing about Vivziepop after the season 2 leak. And feel free to add your two cents into this.

I’ve been getting a lot of rants in my askbox, don’t worry. And I agree with you 100%, and it’s fucking ridiculous on how society acts like this

[kiki-writes-stuff]

𝐓𝐞𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮

𝐓𝐞𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 : fluff

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : none

𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐥: please note that I'm a manhwa only, so my perception of the boys is based solely on what we've seen up till chapter 60 of the manhwa and researching their wiki pages and mbtis (studied for it like a damn test omg 😭).

a/n: this was inspired by this fic by @starry-nights-garden, ik ya'll are here for testar and not ateez, but they're an amazing author so if you happen to be an atiny do check them out!

𝐁𝐚𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐣𝐢𝐧:

Always puts you first

This may seem like something to be expected in any healthy relationship, but our little baby hamster takes it to a whole other level

He’s very shy and hesitant at first

But once he gets comfy with you and gains a little more confidence in his understanding of you and your needs…

Ooooooh boy you better prepare yourself

You mention in passing that you’re bored? He’s already running through his schedule in his head to try and find an opening so he can swing by your place with a list of activities he thinks you might enjoy

Something happened to upset you? He’s all ears, will find a way to slip out of practice just so he can videocall you and listen to you vent to get it out of your system 

You miss him? He’s honestly upset with himself for not realising he’s neglected you sooner, immediately drops whatever he can to make time for you

I still feel like he’d overthink and second guess himself a lot tho :(( always worries that maybe he isn’t giving you what you need, or that he’s too much or too little :((

So please give this baby lots of smiles and assurance! He needs to know that he’s reading your cues right, and that what he’s doing genuinely makes you happy

Because your happiness is always his top priority

𝐑𝐲𝐮 𝐂𝐡𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐰𝐨𝐨

Taking care of you

Now, one thing I’ve noticed about our boy Chungwoo is that he’s got a really strong sense of responibility and obligation, and I’m sure that’s something that would carry into the way he treats his partner

He sees it as his duty to make sure that you’re safe and comfortable at all times

The kinda guy to treat sidewalk and door rules like Law

If anything’s bothering you he makes it his personal mission to fix the problem

Which causes some friction at the beginning of your relationship because sometimes he can be a bit much about it

Like offering slightly unsolicited and overly practical advice 

That friend’s been giving you a hard time? Just ditch em cuz they obviously don’t deserve someone as amazing as you 🙄😮‍💨

Or blaming himself and getting frustrated if he can’t do anything to help fix the problem 

But eventually you talk it out, and once you assure him that it isn’t his job to make everything okay, and that he already helps you so much by being there to support you, he concedes and learns to be more chill about it

Still gets upset when you’re upset

But he knows to channel it in healthier ways now

Like helping you out with little chores when you’re stressed, checking in and offering to take care of more tedious things like laundry and groceries when he can

He never asks for anything in return because it’s HIS job to look after YOU

But is still absolutely not so secretly over the moon whenever you reciprocate that energy

Kicking his feet and giggling kinda happy that one time you dropped by the practice room to bring him lunch (bonus points if you made it yourself!)

𝐒𝐞𝐨𝐧 𝐀𝐡𝐲𝐞𝐨𝐧:

Little things

My baby 🥺💕

My sweet precious little faerie prince 🥹✨️🌸

He’s gentle and soft in the way he loves you

But dear god it could not be less subtle 

Will bring you these random little gifts

Usually food (snacks, chocolates, coffee, milkshakes, muffins)

But sometimes it’s just things that reminded him of you

Like a stuffed animal that looked just like you, a sticker sheet in your favorite color, a keychain of a character you love, a postcard with a picture that made him think of you

Sends you texts throughout the day too

Pictures of flowers, the sky, a book he thinks you might like, a cute cat he saw on the way to the studio, a selfie Eugene forcibly took with him

Little reminders to eat, stay hydrated, “The weather report says it’ll be a bit colder than usual and that it might rain today, please make sure you dress warmly and bring an umbrella with you!”

Will randomly ramble about how much he loves you when he thinks knows you’re asleep or busy so you won’t read the texts till later

“I saw this quote on pinterest earlier today about how ‘intimacy is safety’ and I just wanted to tell you that that’s what you are to me. I always feel safe and comfortable when I’m with you, like there’s no one else in the world but us and I don’t have to worry about saying the right words or being misunderstood because I know our hearts are both fluent in silence, and as soon as I’m with you I’m home.” 

He thinks of these things when he’s with you tbh, like when you’re having coffee together and he watches the way you laugh and scrunch your nose when you smile

But he’s worried that if he tries to say it it’ll come out wrong :((

So he sets the feeling aside and it ends up accumulating into this neverending well of love and affection that he just HAS to let out somehow

So, basically, you’re on his mind 24/7 and he needs you to know that

You’re such a wonderful person ofc you deserve to know how loved you are :((

And so does he!! He’ll get all shy and squirm a bit whenever you tell him how much he means to you, or when you lean your head on his shoulder and thread your fingers through his own

But he’s smiling and blushing

If he’s feeling brave he’ll bring your hand up to his lips and kiss your knuckles

Adbhsafwilfhawliu I’m just so soft for him I’m sorry 

𝐋𝐞𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐣𝐢𝐧:

Makes you laugh

There’s nothing he loves more than hearing you absolutely lose it

Even if you say you sound like dying frogs trapped in a windshield wiper

Will insist that it’s the prettiest sound he’s ever heard

He’s lying, it’s not

But it makes him so happy to hear you so what does it matter?

The way your ears turn red and your face flushes as you try to hide it in a pillow or your hands

Or better yet his shoulder or chest

Sejin absolutely has physical touch as a love language 

His favorite thing is the way you cling to him when you laugh

Even if it means you hit him a few times in the process

Because sometimes a lot of the time once you’ve calmed down you don’t really move

You stop putting all your weight on him sure

But you stay tucked into his side and he gets to put an arm around you and look at the way your eyes are still sparkling and your lips are pulled into this giant grin

Bonus points if you’re shorter than him and he can look down at you without you really noticing 

Our boy is whipped

But not whipped enough to spare you from tickle fights 

If you’re a ticklish person he can and will use that to his advantage 

There have been one or two occasions where it got really intense and someone hit the other person in the nose or kneed them in the stomach

𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐞:

Makes time for you

Listen

Listen 

This boy is literally singing and dancing for his LIFE okay

He’s a twenty nine year old in the body of a 20 year old with the soul of a sixty seven year old man

He doesn’t have time for all this trivial nonsense

…………….

Unless ofc you wanna go to that cute cafe you mentioned last week

Or that movie you really wanted to see is coming out this Friday

And yk if you really must have that spa day where you spend hours doing his nails and putting on face masks….

Who is he to deny you?

Sometimes his poker face does bother you

You’ll be rambling about something or enthusiastically making plans

When you suddenly realise he hasn’t said anything in a while

You feel bad and backtrack, apologising and saying you’re probably boring him or rushing into plans when he’s already so busy with performances and practice and whatnot

He actually looks surprised 

Quickly tells you you have nothing to be sorry for, he loves listening to you talk :((

And he’ll set aside time so you guys can go do the thing, ofc he will when you’re so excited about it >:((

He’s so matter of fact and blunt about it that there isn’t much room for doubt, and you’re back to happily telling about whatever it is that’s got your interest this week

Except this time, if you’re really paying attention

There’s this tiny smile resting contentedly on his face

Everything else can wait just a bit, just for a little while longer

𝐂𝐡𝐚 𝐄𝐮𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐞:

Is your personal hype man!!

Eugene is one of the most passionate people in any universe, and he’s pretty straightforward when it comes to voicing his thoughts

So there’s no way he’s not the most vocal partner ever 

Whatever it is, whether you’re hitting an important academic/professional milestone or working hard for a personal goal, he’s right there cheering you on

Will catch you off guard sometimes though

Like he’ll suddenly get all serious, and tell you in the most sincere tone of voice you could imagine that he’s really proud of you

Before grinning and grabbing your hands

Will swing them back and forth while talking about how lucky he is to have such an amazing s/o

One of his favorite things is when you’re trying to choose an outfit for something and he gets a personal fashion show

He’s not really all that into fashion himself but he loves seeing all the outfits you come up with

Applauds and wolf whistles every time you step out

Except when he doesn’t 

There have been times where he goes quiet and says he doesn’t like an outfit

Confuses you because excuse?? You KNOW it looks good on you???

After some interrogation he grudgingly admits that it does look amazing on you… He just doesn’t want anyone else to see you in it 

He knows you’re a grown adult who can wear whatever they want wherever they want

But he still gets just a little bit jealous

You’re so gorgeous he can’t help it :((

After some cheek kisses and assurance he’s all good tho

10/10 would have an album on his phone that’s just pictures of you

𝐊𝐢𝐦 𝐑𝐚𝐞𝐛𝐢𝐧:

Includes you

My precious bby pt.2 🥹✨️

Now, we all know that Raebin is our little producer genius and very much introverted 

So when inspiration strikes and he’s caught up in the thick of it, he can sort of retreat into his own little world

And when he’s all tired from being around the other members and fans all day

He loves having you there with him

You don’t have to be doing anything in particular together, definitely don’t have to be talking (he loves you but his social battery can only take so much)

He just wants to know you’re close :((

He won’t be the one to instigate, but his brain fizzles into static noise for a second or two if you pull up a chair beside him (which is in there especially for you btw) and curl up next to him 

Doing work on your laptop, reading a webtoon on your phone, or reading a book 

You make eye contact when he looks over and you guys share a small smile :((

He’s so happy that you’re comfortable enough in his space to treat it as your own

Does the same if he’s in your space 

You could be sitting on your bed and he’ll sleepily shuffle into your room

If he’s awake enough he might stand just inside the door and knock a bit on the doorframe just to get your permission before walking in

But if he’s real tired and you guys have been together for a while baby feels so comfy and safe he briefly forgets manners and propriety and walks right in

Flops onto the bed beside you and lays his head on your tummy or thigh depending on how you’re sitting 

Falls asleep almost instantly if you start running your fingers through his hair 

Remember to reblog, comment, and like! Feedback is always appreciated, support your authors loves, don't be a stranger ૮꒰˶ ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶꒱ა

[manicplank]

argument headcannons? Like what they’d do during or after?

Argument

Peppino: He gets very hot-headed and angry. All levels of anxiety turn into complete rage. Occasionally, he'll start crying because he's so mad. Afterwards, depending on what the argument was about, he'll be super stoic and passive aggressive, or he'll feel super guilty and apologize.

Gustavo: He gets pretty frustrated. It takes a lot to anger him, so he usually keeps his cool. He might get a little agitated. After he calms down, he apologizes and tries to talk it out.

Mr. Stick: He gets red-faced and aggressive. He will throw unnecessary insults in and make everything turn personal, even over the smallest thing. After, he can be very passive aggressive. He usually refuses to apologize first. He thinks he's always right.

Pepperman: He'll argue over the simplest of things, mostly because he thinks he knows everything. You can present facts and cute your sources, but he'd still deny them. If you piss him off enough, he starts to scream, but that's very rare. He usually won't apologize first, even if he feels bad. He'll just pout as he paints vent art.

The Vigilante: He's a bit closed-minded and will argue over small shit. Don't get him started on conspiracy theories. He's very stubborn. There's no getting through to him. He doesn't get super angry. He will eventually be the bigger person and apologize.

The Noise: Depending on the day and his mood, he might be super cocky and passive aggressive. He'll taunt and insult them just to piss them off. He's super petty. Sometimes, he gets a little assertive and will raise his voice slightly. He'll get defensive. Other times, he completely rages. He has a short temper and gets riled up easily. If they're not careful, he'll attack and possibly even kill them. It varies on how he acts afterward. He might be pouty and still mean. He might calm down and give a half-assed forced apology (taking none of the blame). Noisette might drag him in by the ear and make him apologize. He might give them the death stare when he sees them. Veeery rarely will he come in crying and genuinely apologize (this only happens to Noisette). This was a long one because he's an asshole.

Noisette: She's very passive aggressive. She can usually control her temper during the situation. She's pretty stubborn. Even if she's wrong, she will refuse to admit it because she doesn't want to look stupid. She does her best to stay respectful, but if they insult her, she will LOSE IT. It takes a lot to make her rage. When she rages... RUN. She will throw things, break things, scream insults, and say things she doesn't mean. Sometimes, she shuts down and starts crying instead (depending on what the argument is about). She may or may not apologize. It takes a while for her to cool down. After, she will want to talk it out and hug.

Fake Peppino: He will get big and angry. He does NOT like being yelled at. He doesn't care if he was wrong. He has the potential to become incredibly dangerous. He screams and screeches. He doesn't listen and becomes very stubborn. If you insult him, he turns into a complete monster. When he settles down, he might come over and apologize.

Pizzahead: It takes a LOT to make this guy angry. He'll start off by not taking anything seriously. He turns everything into a joke. Then he gets petty and passive aggressive. If they piss him off enough, he'll lose his mind. He's screaming and insulting them. He'll throw things at them and try to harm them. He almost NEVER apologizes. He's quick to hold a grudge.

Pillar John: He almost never argues. He's a very nice and agreeable guy. It's actually hard to start an argument with him. He keeps his cool and tries to speak logically. He can mediate things pretty easily. The argument doesn't last long, and he apologizes even if he did nothing wrong.

Gerome: They're pretty much arguing with themselves. He just sits there with a hand on his hip and lets them yell. After a while, he'll go, "You done?" He never argues back. He thinks it's a waste of time.

[sasheneskywalker]

brujay fic recs

When It's You by MissNaya Jason's had a bit of a crush on Bruce for years. He finally acts on it.

E | Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

(you kept me like a secret) i kept you like an oath by gatheringwool Jason always knew everyone would flip out when they found out about him and Bruce.

He just always assumed it would be more along the lines of Jason, you dirty whore you. Not whatever the hell this was.

M | Rape/Non-Con, Underage | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

What Would You Trade The Pain For? (I’m Not Sure) by Disniq Jason has been doing an outstanding job of not thinking about Bruce in the four months since Roy pulled his ass out of Gotham. When Jason gets hit by an unidentified beam and starts reliving his worst Bruce-related memories in his dreams, though, there’s not a whole lot he can do about it except maybe vent some frustrations.

Or; the universe conspires to put Jason and Bruce in a get-along shirt. It only deteriorates from there.

E | Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

What Happened Doesn't Change Anything by Disniq Bruce reaches for his robe and finds it missing.

Maybe he needs to be naked for this, exposed. Everything between them finally laid bare.

M | No Archive Warnings Apply | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

duplicity by Anonymous Jason can’t do this anymore; can’t do the lies, the charade, the duplicity. But this is Bruce, and nothing ever comes easy where he’s concerned.

E | No Archive Warnings Apply | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

crossfire by Anonymous “You’re just full of tricks, aren’t you?” the Red Hood asks, dodging Bruce's attack. “Having the playbook helps, though.”

There's a new vigilante shaking up Gotham, one who's not afraid of a little blood. Expertly trained and ruthless in his methods, the Red Hood is a formidable opponent, outsmarting Bruce at every turn. As Bruce's investigation unravels, it becomes clear that Batman and the Red Hood are connected in a way that Bruce had never dreamed possible.

E | No Archive Warnings Apply | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

Live and Let Die by The Doorman (Neo) There was a time Jason wanted to be angry forever, but it's true that all things eventually change with age. It only stands to reason that he and Bruce would someday too. Bruce, as always, is the last person to figure that stuff out.

E | No Archive Warnings Apply | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne, Roy Harper/Jason Todd

autocorrelation by cursedway (wiitts) Bruce’s voice is rough with sleep and tight, like the words hurt coming out. “I didn’t think about you like… like this. When you were a kid.”

Jason can’t help but roll his eyes. “I know.”

-

Jason comes back from the dead, but Bruce's son doesn't.

E | Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

Healing Wounds by forestgreen He'll blame it on the pain, Jason decides. Or on the concussion. Jason wouldn't be here if it weren't for them. Bruce wouldn't be touching him if it weren't for them.

T | No Archive Warnings Apply | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

Parallel Loves by forestgreen "I came to apologize," Bruce says.

T | No Archive Warnings Apply | Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne, Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

Möbius by forestgreen This thing between them has never needed words. It exists without negotiations, without acknowledgment, hidden away in dark corners where the two of them can pretend it never happens, that it doesn't exist.

E | No Archive Warnings Apply | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

Wind Beats Like Wings by submariner Oliver was fuming by the time Bruce pulled up to the house. “You keep your fucked up family bullshit the hell out of my city,” he told Bruce quietly, as he and Mia exited the car.

Bruce didn’t say anything.

Oliver hadn’t expected him to.

in which Oliver Queen sees a lot more than he ever wanted to.

E | No Archive Warnings Apply | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

scabs by boyguts He has scabs on his knees and burns on his thighs.

Bruce didn’t ask, but maybe he should've.

In which Jason's new life at the manor is rife with miscommunication, and Jason doesn't know what Bruce wants from him. Unfortunately, Bruce doesn't seem to know what he wants, either.

M | Underage, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne, Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne, Jason Todd/Willis Todd

on the edge of your smile by boyguts Jason laughs again, a soft, sad little sound. "Don't look at me like I just smacked you. I came back, okay?"

When Bruce can’t respond, can’t summon the courage to do anything but watch his hands shake in his lap, Jason quietly sets the bottle aside and scoots forward. Slowly, like Bruce is a scared animal.

“Bruce,” he says, quiet. Bruce can only close his eyes and breathe. “I’m fine. I came back.”

Not Rated | No Archive Warnings Apply | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne

All You've Ever Known by kuro49 Dick is not supposed to be in town, but then again neither is Jason.

Of all the implications one word can make, this makes all the differences when Jason says: "B-bruce."

E | Rape/Non-Con, Underage | Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson & Jason Todd

[thequietkid-moonie]

Dealing with the lost of a child

[ HEADCANONS ] [ Buddha, Jack, Sasaki, Tesla ]

[ Shuumatsu no Valkyrie / Records of Ragnarok ]

Its funny because the other day I was thinking on how losing a child affect so much the parents and their relasionship

Maybe this isn't my best writing, is just that my personal situation is getting in the way, sorry 😔

Buddha

Buddha loves you with all his heart without being egoist nor possessive, he loves you for how you are so he loves you in your freedom too

Buddha doesn't really think on forming a family with you until after a long time of you two being in a relationship, that doesn't mean he won't like to do so, is just that for a while he is just focused on enjoying all the time you two have together, also because if you two decide to have a child it has to be because both of you want it and are willing to take on that responsibility

Once you two finally have a child Buddha is ecstatic, forming a family with the person he loves the most is something that totally brings joy to his life

Buddha had learned to take death as part of life and he had already lose someone really important in his life a long time ago, still that doesn't make less painful the moment he lose his child. Buddha is deeply hurt and sad for losing his little child, if it was while they were just a baby or toddler it bothers him because his baby didn't had the opportunity to enjoy their life, but if they were older it sadden him but he hold all the memories he has with them close to his heart and just wish to have the opportunity to see him in another life

If his child has died by a disease it take him less time to deal with the grief because since the start he knew that this was a posibility, however if it was murdered or died in a accident of some kind Buddha is more angry and frustrated for not being able to do anything to prevent it. If there is someone to blame Buddha will just make them pay if they cross his path again, he doesn't want to focus on that because he has more important things in his mind, for example you

For his part Buddha deal with the grief pretty well, he let himself feel the sadness of his lost and slowly heal his broken heart with time and patience, easily (but not exactly quickly) reaching a point where he can think on his child with love and a little melancoly, and not being induced by pain and sadness

The fact that Buddha is living his own grief doesn't mean that he will leave you alone with yours, Buddha tries to help you at the best of his habilities, not as the enlightened but as your partner, as someone who is dealing with the same situation as you

He doesn't like leaving you alone, he rather prefer to just sit by your side in complete silence, only if you really need time to yourself he will let you alone, reasuring you that he is with you and you can count on him for everything, you are not alone

Buddha more than ever likes to hold you close and cuddle you for a while, anytime you are feeling specially down for your lost Buddha just hold you close and let you cry all you need, or even just staying like that for as long as you need

If you start to fall into a more depresive state Buddha start to take care of you, he knows that this isn't easy to deal and if it affected you that much he should do nothing more than support you at the best of his habilities, however he will make sure it doesn't reach a dangerous and unhealthy point, if you got near that he will stop you

Buddha doesn't like the idea of argumenting with you about this, you two should be supporting each other, if you start argumenting with him he more likely will let you alone to calm down or offering you to heard you vent without having to argument with him, as well as trying to reason with you

With some time and patience you two will be able to get over this, maybe the pain doesn't go away but you two will learn to live with it, together

...

Buddha has already achived peace of mind living even after everything he had passed on his life, still living in the Valhalla is really peaceful and he apreciate that he is able to be there with you, without having to worry about things of the human world, still one thing that he loves the most of being there is that he can see his beloved child again, the first moment he saw them it was shocking, but in a good way, it take him a moment to understand what were happening before running to hug them with tears on his eyes

Jack the Ripper

Jack is sure that he loves you will all his heart and being, as the time pass he is just more and more in love with you, even if you two fall into a monotone routine over the years is something that he appreciate dearly in his heart

The idea of starting a family with you is something that excited him but make him nervous too, he hadn't has the best childhood but he doesn't complain either, however he doesn't want for his child to suffer from what he suffered, still he is willing to have a child with you if you want it too

Finally having a child with you make him soft, it make him feel like he is just a normal man with his family, it make him forget all the difficulties that he had in his life

Jack is pretty used to death, it has been close to him all his life, still that doesn't mean that losing his own child won't hurt, because it does and a lot, it doesn't matter if it was just a baby or he had the bless to spend years with them, it still broke his heart

If his child died by a disease there isn't much he could have done and still he had done everything in his power to help his child, but if they were murdered or even by an accident where there is someone to blame Jack will be so hurt that he will take out all his anger on the culprit without thinking twice

As much as it hurts him Jack doesn't forget about you, he knows that he still have you and that this is a lost for you too, so he want to help you, Jack want to be able to heal his broken heart and reach the future by your side

Jack may seem calm and composed, almost like if this situation doesn't affect him but that is far from the truth, he is incredibly sad but he is the type to deal with his emotions in a indirect way, being able to just be with you and bring you comfort helps him too. It could be that it makes you mad how little he express his sadness, but if you want he will tell you how hurt he is, if it makes you feel more at ease he will let you see more how truly affected he is

He let you cry all you need, he even cry with you the first times, he never tell you that you are overreacting or that you should stop crying, only you knows how much this hurts you so he isn't going to stop you from expressing your feelings (unless it start to turn unhealthy, like become a deep depression or you start to develop unhealthy habits)

Jack totally understand if you need time alone or not wanting to see anyone at all, he let you stay all by yourself, in the meantime he can deal with his own grief by his own too, however Jack try to help you stay healthy, making sure you eat properly and get out to take some fresh air from time to time

Even if you prefer to be alone or don't want to talk to anyone Jack reminds you every day that he is still there with you AND for you, you can rely on him too since he understand what you are going through, he reminds you every day that he still loves you and even when he is heart broken he isn't planning on leaving you

Jack doesn't like argumenting with you, he understand that you are frustrated and angry for everything that happened but it would be better in this situation to be united supporting each other, he normally let you vent and reason with you but he will get defensive if you ever try to put the blame on him or something like that

As dificult as it can be Jack isn't going to let you alone, Jack had already lose his child and he doesn't want to lose you too, so he tries to deal with the grief by your side, without forcing you to move forward but without leaving you behind

...

Despite everything Jack doesn't regret his life, he had some troubles but a lot of good things happened to him too. He never thought much in the afterlife but still he is happy to spend it in such beautiful place, but more important is that he is happy to be able to share it with you and his child, the child he lost so long ago and missed so much. The moment he saw his beloved child Jack can't react and just stare at them shocked, he get into his senses until his child take his attention again, making his smile softly to them

Sasaki Kojiro

Sasaki is a really loving person with his partner and even when you two left the honeymoon phase of your relationship or when it had already you have already spent several years together the loves he holds for you doesn't decreases or fades, Sasaki happily falls into a comfortable rutine with you

Sasaki doesn't really think much in starting a family with you but it isn't like he is opposed to the idea, so even if you are the one who brings the idea of doing it he is totally up for it, and once he stops to actually think on it it make him feel fuzzy inside, the feeling that the idea of forming a family with the person he loves the most bring him is similar to when you two started to date

When you two finally form your own family he is completely excited for it, almost like a child with a new toy he is full of innocent joy

However, the cruel destiny had other plans and after a while you two end up losing your beloved child. If is by a disease Sasaki will be incredibly sad, however he had done everything in his power to help them, after the lost he will be just craving for your comforting company, however if it happened by an accident or even they being murdered it would be more difficult to process for him, he had trained so hard and become so stronger and still he wasn't able to protect the ones he loves the most

Sasaki is dealing with his lost by his own, still he likes to ask you how you are and sometimes he craves for your comfort (he knows he can't ask you to be alright in this moment so is more likely comforting each other). He also resorts to training to distract himself of everything and letting out all his frustration and sadness with it

Sasaki is more the type to deal with his emotions by his own so he totally understand when you need time to yourself or that you have your own ways to deal with the grief, so most of the time he let you deal with it in the way you need it, however if he feels like you shouldn't be alone or that you directly express that you want his company he just stay by your side (probably cuddling), and he never do it forced or unwillingly

If you start to fall into a depresive state he will panics a little, he noticed by the unhealthy habits you start to get or you clearly down expression, it scare him because he doesn't want to lose you too and he may be a little pushy at first, motivated by his fear (that probably could lead you two to have some arguments) however it doesn't take him long to calm down and think on a better way to help you, help the two of you

Is just a matter of time for Sasaki to start to feel better, he is still sad by his lost, it still hurt but he start to want to continue, so if in that moment you still strugle with your grief he is completely willing to help you at the best of his habilities

Sasaki doesn't like to argument with you about all this situation, he is hurt too and he is sad too but he doesn't like to take it out in you (that is why he train so much), so if you ever start an argument or seem specially angry/frustrated he prefers to let you alone so you can calm down or heard you vent but he won't really accept for you to take it out on him (let alone blame him)

It isn't going to be easy but after some time you two will be able to get over it, and despite everything Sasaki still loves you and doesn't want to lose you, you are too important to him and he wants to give a try to continue being with you, he doesn't want to give up in your relationship

...

Sasaki was surprised when he first wake up in the Valhalla, however he isn't going to complain about being in such an amazing place, he can be lazy sometimes so he will spend a while just relaxing, specially after finding you, you two doesn't have to worry about anything else anymore so why don't just enjoy it? However the moment he has the opportunity to see his child again Sasaki needs a moment to fully understand that this is happening, Sasaki dealt with his grief pretty well and still when he see them again he is completely excited, almost immediatly running to them, picking them up while laughing excitedly and starting to cry a little for the overwhelming happiness. Sasaki wants to continue with his training and become stronger but it won't happen in a long time because right now he wants to focus in his beloved family

Nikola Tesla

Dating Tesla could be a little troublesome for how much he is into his work, still that doesn't mean that your relationship can't work, after a while you two can easily come into the terms where you two spend some time together and can continue with his work, also no matter how much time you two spend together his love for you continue being really stronge and he loves doing things for you

Tesla doesn't think much on the future but at least once the idea of forming a family with you appears in his mind and he isn't opoused to the idea, he will love to do so but for him isn't obligatory, if you want to have a family he will love to do it and almost imediatly start planning and thinking in your future family, if you don't or aren't interested on it he is totally fine with it

When you two finally have a child he is totally ecstatic, Tesla can't stop smiling and braging about his beloved family, he spends a lot of time with both for a while before getting to his work again (and probably to create something for you two)

Losing his child will hurt him a lot, he had already lost someone really important in his life back in a young age and this is as hurtful as that moment, it doesn't matter how old his child were or if it was for a disease or an accident (if it was killed he will want justice, but it doesn't go far from that)

Tesla doesn't handle too well with the grief, he tries to stay optimistic and with an smile saying that he just holds the memories he has with his child close to his heart and he will never forget them, Tesla doesn't show much how hurt he is or how much he miss his child, not even to himself, he prefers to stay stronge and optimistic for both

One unhealthy way Tesla has to deal with the grief is putting his whole attention to his work, he doesn't handle too well whit this overwhelming feelings so he stays in the confort zone of his study, but in the process he start to let you aside, not because he doesn't love you anymore but because he doesn't find a way to help you when he can't handle his own emotions

Tesla doesn't like argumenting with you, let alone over all this situation, it breaks his heart so he prefer to avoid argumenting and just talk in a more calm manner, so normally just let you vent (he won't really blame him for something, but if you point out how much he concentrate in his work it will affect him)

However, even Tesla has a breaking point, it would take him a while since he is pretty hopeful and cheerful but at some point he will break down and start crying over his lost (specially for how bad you are feeling, when you start to get depresive he start fearing losing you), in that moment he will let it out all what he is feeling, he finally talks about how much he miss his child, how hurt and sad he feels, how much he regret not being able to do more for his beloved child, but, more important, how happy is for still having you, even when you are so sad and hurt too you continue being the light of his life, he tells you how much he loves you and admit that if he has been so stronge is because he has you by his side

From that breaking point you two will have the opportunity to start the healing process, from the lost and from all that you two had been through, but know you could do it together. Tesla doesn't want to lose you too and he wants to make it up for all this time he has been ignoring his feelings, for you and for himself, so now he is more determinante to help you and let himself live the grief and stay together

...

Tesla never thought much in what will come after dead he just enjoys all the life he had, Tesla doesn't regret his life, he is happy of all he had done and achived, still when he wakes up in the Valhalla he is happy for being there. The Valhalla is a really peaceful and beautiful place and he is eager to explore it, however before doing it he wants to spends a lot of time with you and with your child, just as he did when he was alive, he wants to spend all the time he couldn't in the past with his child. The moment he saw his child again he is completely ecstatic and waste no time before running to their side

[little-cagedbird]

Hello, how are you? I hope you are doing well! This is the first time I’m posting something on Tumblr; I usually post on Wattpad, but only in Portuguese. English is not my first language, so I apologize if it’s not very good.

Notes: We don’t have any notes, just a lot of cuteness and Nanami being adorable.

Kento Nanami x Fem reader

Summary: The reader had a difficult and frustrating day at work, but she doesn’t need to worry too much; Nanami will always be there to comfort her.

As a Jujutsu sorcerer and someone who has worked in offices, Nanami knows perfectly well how exhausting work can be and how much superiors demand from their employees. So, when you came home looking sad and disheartened, he could understand that his beloved was going through the same thing he had experienced.

The blonde man immediately noticed the moment you arrived and hugged him hurriedly, your slumped shoulders and tired sighs escaping your beautiful lips. This made Nanami embrace you warmly and give you a quick kiss on the forehead.

“Did you have a tough day?” he asked, still holding you in front of the door, waiting until you felt comfortable enough to step back. He would hold you for as long as you needed.

“Yes. I feel so useless; I had a deadline to meet, why couldn’t I just get it done? I should have tried harder.” Seeing the person he loves most in the world blaming herself for something that wasn’t her fault made Nanami’s heart ache. He pulled you even closer to his chest, wishing to erase those negative thoughts from the mind of his wife, who he knew worked so hard.

“Darling, don’t say that. You haven’t even been sleeping properly because you’ve been pushing yourself too hard at work, so don’t blame yourself. You were overwhelmed; it’s normal for things like this to happen when we’re exhausted.” Nanami placed another kiss on your forehead and stepped back just enough to look into your eyes, which always captivated him. To him, his wife remained as enchanting as the first time he saw her, and his love for you grew stronger with each day they spent together.

“I could have done better; I know I could.” You were feeling mentally and physically drained. The harsh words you had heard from your boss—who had simply dumped all the work on your shoulders—had pushed you to your limit. The overtime was wearing you down, but in your quest to prove your competence, you had ignored the signals from your own body. Being in Nanami’s arms was your refuge. His comforting words made you feel like you could finally rest and vent your frustrations.

“You did the best you could; don’t push yourself beyond your limits.” He held your face in his hands and gave you a lingering kiss on your lips. Nanami was a serious and reserved man, but when it came to his wife, nothing was too much to show how much he loved her.

After dinner, you both lay down in bed, feeling safe and relaxed. Nanami hugged you, resting his chin on your head as you snuggled comfortably against his chest.

“Thank you for being here,” you whispered, your exhaustion evident in your voice, but you didn’t sound as disheartened as before, which relieved Nanami, who deeply cared for you.

“You don’t need to thank me, but please never belittle yourself. Hearing you say those things makes me sad. I love you more than I can express. You are the most hardworking and dedicated person I know, so never doubt that.” Nanami hugged you tighter, making you smile. The love Kento showed warmed his heart.

“I love you too, and my love for you is infinite. I promise not to speak like that anymore.” The feeling of mutual love was unique and comforting, something indescribable and unparalleled, as sleep gently enveloped them.

[lackablazeical]

💣💥Mikey Hamato💥💣

Specific trigger warnings -

Underage drinking/usage of drugs, murder, violence, usage of queer slurs (both in reclaiming and hurtful ways), slut-shaming, victim blaming, animal abuse, overdosing, gaslighting, manipulation, addiction

General info -

Mikey's birthday is December 7th. He is a Sagittarius ♐️

Mikey's love language is Quality Time.

Mikey is unlabeled.

Mikey has BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder).

Mikey has ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder).

Personality traits -

Mikey is brash, rude, impatient, ambitious, creative, violent, snarky, egotistical, aggressive, erratic, jealous, self-centered, and hypocritical.

Mikey is the definition of a troll. He likes saying hurtful and offensive things to get attention from people, or hurt others. He actually rarely morally agrees with what he says, though.

Mikey is quick to violence, and would absolutely rather throw a punch then waste his time getting annoyed by someone.

Mikey tends to throw his weight around a lot, as he knows he is able to win any fight he gets into. Physical intimidation is his favorite past time.

Mikey only shows a nicer side of himself with his family and, rarely, Kenichi. He's more playful, and loves giving his brothers shit and teasing them.

Mikey is an extremely jealous person, and will absolutely maim anyone who dare even look at His People. He likes being the center of his loved one's attention.

Mikey is a hypocrite, as almost any opinion, moral standing, or action he takes, is often contradictory. As example, he is a compulsive liar, but also hates liars.

Mikey loves art and drawing, and has a very creative mind. He is a fast learner with it too, and can pick up on many different mediums and styles quickly.

Important details -

His Collar -

His collar was originally put on at 13.

Mikey's collar is made of a mystic metal that was provided and forged by Draxum.

The collar has magical properties, such as growing alongside Mikey. This prevents him from being choked by it as he grows. It also does not chafe his neck, even though it fits snuggly, so there is no scarring.

The collar cannot be taken off unless Draxum specifically removes it. It does not scratch, tarnish, dent, or rust.

His relationship with Big Mama -

He is a Mama's boy. He adores his mother and spends a lot of time with her.

He listens to everything BM says and is often compared to an obedient puppy by his brothers.

Mikey may tend to get frustrated with BM occasionally, but he still loves her and will often forget about it quickly.

BM is the one who provides most of the drugs/alcohol Mikey consumes.

Mikey has free rein of BM's bank account and loves spending her money.

Mikey is often 'in the know' about BM's darker business practices, as he's directly involved in them or interacts with the people involved in them.

His drug use -

Mikey has been using drugs/drinking since about 9 years of age.

He first began using hard drugs at the age of 13, as a 'celebration' of getting his collar and officially joining the Nexus.

He has an extremely high tolerance, and often needs to consume extreme amounts of any substance to feel a buzz.

When Mikey is fully drunk/high, he often tends to swing between extremely affectionate to extremely violent on a dime. He also will likely be more emotional, and is known to cry a lot.

His mystic powers -

Mikey has an extreme amount of mystic energy. The flame on his mask is mystic, and is a way to vent out excess energy so it doesn't build and become a ticking time bomb.

If his mask is not avaliable, typically an object near Mikey will combust within around 10-20 minutes of being near him.

Mikey can control the fire, including heat, brightness, and whether it spreads or not. If he is emotional, this control lessens, and the fire is at risk of burning someone or something.

Mikey's collar also doubles as a way to control and harness the mystic energy.

Mikey isn't exactly aware of his mystic powers. Well, he is, he just doesn't really care, and hasn't attempted to learn more about them.

His relationship with Kenichi -

Mikey and Kenichi are close friends.

They originally bonded over their mutual hatred of Usagi and Leo being together.

The two often play-fight. Mikey goes easy on Kenichi, but Kenichi is still always proud of himself if he manages to get a good hit in.

The two often argue about their views of Usagi. Kenichi dislikes Mikey's harassment, and Mikey excuses it as 'just a joke.'

Mikey is an asshole to Kenichi, but Kenichi is aware that that is just how Mikey acts, and doesn't take his words personally.

Mikey calls Kenichi 'leftie', 'breeder', 'fluff', 'fatass', and more.

His hatred of Usagi -

Mikey hates Usagi because he believes Usagi is manipulating Leo and stealing all his time and attention.

Mikey slut-shames Usagi constantly. This is mainly based in the stereotypes that rabbits constantly breed, and Mikey figured out that it bothered Usagi.

Mikey bullies and harassed Usagi constantly. This often comes in the form of drawing provocative, crude, and offensive art of Usagi for Usagi to find. He'll also scream at, berate, and attempt to harm Usagi. Leo doesn't let Mikey harm Usagi, but that doesn't stop Mikey from trying.

His fame -

Mikey is considered famous in the Hidden City, and within the modern yokai world. He's mostly akin to an influencer.

Mikey doesn't like taking photos or giving out his signature and will only do so if forced by Big Mama. Any other time, he may shove the fan away or break the camera/writing utensil being used.

Mikey posts often on yokai social media's but is still extremely private about where he is located or who he is with.

Mikey has extremely vocal haters, as well as extremely vocal fans. He enjoys sending his fans on witch-hunts or harassing people who don't like him.

Mikey doesn't do sponsorships unless forced to by Big Mama. He doesn't ever care about what he is endorsing.

Mikey likes things like edits/fanfictions/art/threads bc he thinks they're funny to laugh at.

His role in the Battle Nexus -

Mikey mostly preforms as a rodeo clown/jester of sorts in fights. He entertains the crowd, through jokes and skits. He rarely gets involved in actual fights, unless it's to anger either competitor or get them fighting eachother.

Mikey may also actually fight, when needing to defend his role as champion. These fights are huge for publicity, and are City-wide events.

He's also often involved in interviews and PR about the Battle Nexus. He doesn't enjoy this, but BM forces him to do it.

He is not involved in off-shoots of the Battle Nexus, such as the Street Brawl.

Mikey may also do acrobatic half-time or opening shows, which act somewhat like a circus. He does stunts, tricks, and more in this time.

Fun facts -

Mikey's favorite food is Korean hot pot, and his favorite drink is either apple bourbon or any type of juice.

Mikey hates liars, but is known to lie often himself.

Mikey hates being late to things he cares about, and is always punctual to his Nexus battles. If he's late to something, you know he doesn't want to go.

Mikey prefers traditional art, and his favorite medium is marker/ink.

Mikey loves wearing clothes, but refuses to wear shirts or shoes.

Mikey is extremely good at crying on cue, and uses this to manipulate Splinter and BM to get what he wants. Mikey's siblings have learned when he is fake crying, so they don't take him seriously.

Mikey has a habit of rubbing/wiping at his nose with his hand. He's used to his nose running/bleeding because of cocaine use, and it became a stim of his.

Mikey's right molars and premolars are golden. His original teeth got pulled out after a dare-gone-wrong, and Donnie replaced them with gold-coated lead.

Voice claim - [XXXTENTACION]

Tags that include Mikey -

#addams! Mikey, Addams! Michi, Addams! Hamatos

[eldritch-spouse]

Hiyaa, I just found your blog recently and already love the messed-up characters lmao. Especially all of the messed up morbid shit they do in the Clergy. But I wanna go ramble about my sudden scenario idea, feel free to entertain the idea of my brain, mx Pinnie!

(CW: Mentions of Suicide)

Imagine the scenario where all of the TCE boys S/O's have known and were close to Admin in the past before Krulu fucked up everything.

Though in context (I'm basing this off of from Lobotomy Corporation & Library of Ruina story between Angela and the Sephiroths) of Admin and her relationship with the TCE obsession's:

Video of Angela's lore in case you're curious (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxbsSPjBWCA&t=1357s)

Admin was the others personal indirect torturer due to the circumstances of one selfish bastard, who was Admin's father and former boss of the other darlings, that forced Admin to follow the script that he left behind in order to complete the project he and his coworkers wanted to achieve. If Admin didn't follow the script, then everything will reset to the beginning with only Admin aware and remember these loops that repeated thousands of times. To make matters worse, Admin HAD to push the TCE's obsessions till the brink of breakdown to follow the script and hope that the loop will end - it doesn't help that Admin directly had a lot of conversations with the other darlings because they were all in the higher positions and maintained order within the facility.

Admittedly, Admin WANTED to alleviate the sufferings of the others , including the employees (that were seen as expendables), from working in what can only be described as Hell on Earth itself because Admin genuinely cared for the Darlings. But she can't because if she deviates from the script then everything will reset and would further continuing everyone's torture. The Admin's role in this monotonous play was to be the stage's gear that pulls the levers. Watching everyone getting slaughtered, losing their sanities or committing suicide.

When the curtains came to a close, the Darlings were (understandably) not happy with Admin for not only mentally torturing them, but also responsible for undermining all their pain and suffering by fucking up the Script at the very end. Yet despite the anger the Darlings had, they can't entirely blame Admin for it because they were all victims of their Boss' abuse. So they tried to lead her to a better path so Admin doesn't become like her father and further her pain.

Boy. It will be very angst worthy for Admin when she meets the others again in the Clergy and becoming the source of the TCE's obsessions.

Now the fun part, Admin and the TCE's obsessions dynamics!

-) With Morell's, Gallon, and Grimbly's Obsession: The three held very little grudge against Admin in the present and were the more sympathetic of her unfortunate situation (Especially after finding out what happened with Krulu and Ludwig). They're mainly the ones to let her vent and listen when Admin needed to let out all her frustrations and emotions. However, Gallon's S/O would be the one to give insights (albeit Philosophical) because she can gouge out what Admin is thinking.

-) With Nebul's & Patches' Obsession: The two could emphasize with Admin's guilt, because the two (despite having different personality with Patches' S/O being the more dominant and responsible while Nebul's S/O is the more quiet and submissive) knew what it was like to be helpless with the circumstances against you and you can't save everyone. That very guilt could swallow you whole and trapped one into a cold suffocating abyss, so the two would often make sure Admin doesn't force herself and wallow in self punishment for too long because despite everything that Admin did and done both in the past and present, the two still genuinely care for her wellbeing.

-) With Belo and Santi's obsession: Ironically, those two were the most upset/disappointed with Admin in the past and present and had no hesitation to express it. Yet, it's what made Admin relaxed around them because the two will be transparent, critical and not sugar-coat what they feel and their beliefs towards the situation to the Admin's face. And Admin knows that the two did it because they don't want to coddle her like the others.

-) Sybastian, Vinnel and Fank-e's Obsession: These three are there to distract Admin from the toxic self-guilt mindset with doing normal stuff like shopping, watching a movie night etc, and had told her: "What's done is done. There's nothing that we can do to make the situation less traumatic and immoral for all of us, but most of us don't blame you for our current life with these monster people. Who's to say we can't be happy here in the future? It's not like it'll be any worse than our last job"

-) Ludwig's Obsession: As if it wasn't bad enough that Admin was Ludwig's crush and best friend, but his S/O is Admin's closest companion out of everyone before the Repetitive Loop. Ludwig's Obsession was the only one who understands Admin the most and how she functions even post-Krulu's vessel. So naturally, Admin would go to her first to have a heart-to-heart with despite the awkward tension in the air with Ludwig into the picture.

Sorry for the long post, but I want to get this idea out of my head and possibly share it to you

[Thenk you! I'm a woman, you can use typically feminine ways to adress me, but I'm not a stickler about it.]

I'm going to confess I don't understand most of what is happening here, probably because I'm not deep into the lore of those two franchises you mentioned, but I do find it interesting.

I suppose it can work as a separate AU wherein Admin retains her memories? And her father somehow orchestrates things to a surprising degree. But it does beg the question, where does Krulu fit in this? Because Krulu is extremely controlling, and I don't see him giving an ounce of control or power to someone in Admin's family. If Krulu is absent from the picture, this can work pretty well!

Overall, I'm genuinely interested, because I love the concept of looping and "restarting" as well as characters that are aware of it to some degree (yeah sure I had an Undertale phase, but it's not like this fondness stemmed solely from there), so I really enjoy the possibilities you can explore here. You've made an interesting narrative, congrats! 🤔