#he's just confused and working through it. which we can accept is a perfectly “nuanced” story about sexuality. without that kind of angst

[eddiegettingshot]

#controversial #startingdiscourse i do think it's funny that buck buckley is on screen canonically struggling a lot with what it means to be bisexual and hasn't even called himself anything but an Ally and possibly attached a lot of his sexuality to his relationship and has not yet put together Who He Really Is and What He Really Wants, all of which is incredibly interesting with a lot of conflict and opportunity for character exploration, but we forego discussing any of this in great depth (buck gets to be happy and relieved) and instead every other day litigate pure fanon around eddie's sexuality in a way that's pretty much entirely unfounded in the text at this point and also very obviously is influenced by shit people want to say about his racial and cultural background. But anyway

[thinkin-bout-milgram]

Hello once again! Figured I'd respond to some of the points you raised here. Unlike we've sometimes been known to do, though, this is more just my thoughts on the Trikoto theory in light of what you brought up. I hadn't seen much of any evidence listed out for it before, so I wanted to give my opinions

Spoilers: I still don't personally believe it, but this gave me a lot more reason to believe that it could be possible. If it happens in Trial 2, I would be a whole lot less blindsided by it and I'd see the foreshadowing a lot more, so thanks for that!

I'll be going through your post and indenting your text. Let's go!

Am I really insane enough to look for lore hints in the damn Es covers? Maybe I am

Okay but like I started it. Sooo...

(On our side note) It definitely makes the Amane dilemma a bit more nuanced if your idea is more accurate, but without knowing for sure, I’m still a pretty steadfast Amane innoer.

Yeah, that's really my point of confusion. On an individual level I think voting Amane innocent is right, but I worry about the other prisoners and think the best way to keep them safe would be voting her guilty. Rather than "voting her guilty makes her more erratic -> more risk," I see it as "voting her innocent gives more freedom to do what she wants -> more risk." That being said, I officially started voting her innocent today so. Who knows!

Except, small issue. In John Doe, Kotoko easily beats Akakoto. It’s not even close; she surprise attacks the guy, calls his moves hot garbage (well, she says “his technique is definitely that of an amateur”, which is close enough), and then, even when Akatoko is ready for a fight, she makes him faint with one hit.

Yeah, this is some solid evidence. I guess I always just thought of it as Kotoko having to deal with more prisoners and having more space. Like, when Kotoko beat up Akakoto, he was in the interrogation area, right? But theoretically, given that restraints didn't work on him, he'd have full range of the prison between trials.

When they said Mikoto and Kotoko "drew," I didn't really think of it as meaning they were actually equally matched in a fight, necessarily. If Mikoto were able to evade or something, that'd work. Besides, they say it was a draw, but Mikoto's clothes are pretty tattered and Kotoko has no injuries as far as I can tell, so I at least don't think it's perfectly even.

It could also be a writing thing where they wanted Kotoko to just take Akakoto out of the equation so she could talk to Es alone at the end of the audio drama, but that's a less satisfactory in-universe explanation.

Split in half, make that heart beat

It’s generally accepted for Trikoto theory that it is Midokoto talking here. What he’s saying is that, as a gatekeeper alter, he’s trying to keep the lives of Aokoto and Akakoto separate, “split in half” between Aokoto’s more mundane daily life and Aokoto’s nighttime escapades.

Yeah, fair. I think I got kinda lost in the colors on my first read through, so that's on me.

If it helps, I think I can hear an "ore" in the sample we have of Double, so that to me shows that Akakoto would still use ore in the songs.

This is a good point! I hadn't actually thought to go back and check boku vs. ore in the MeMe lyrics, so this is new information to me.

My problem with this is that, as far as I can tell, ore isn't ever used in the songs, and the "I'm (boku) already the fake one" lyrics does make the most sense to me being Akakoto. I unfortunately don't have enough Japanese to argue much on this point, though; curious, does anyone know if Akakoto uses ore in the audio drama? As far as I knew the ore/boku thing wasn't apparent to the audience until the start of Trial 2, but that could be wrong.

Anyways, I don't have a great explanation for the parts that sound like Akakoto but use boku, but given that that's also true for the "I'm already the fake one" line, I could see it going either way.

As a side note, fun fact about the Mikoto related Undercover line.

Don’t you lie about Me. Me, I’ve done nothing wrong.

Three instances of personal pronouns. To be fair, it is pretty hard to construct a sentence with only the two “me”s which doesn’t include any other pronoun, at least in English, but it is there.

Ooh, fun fact time! I just remembered a lot of people probably don't know this: The UNDERCOVER English translation used to be entirely different!

They're still listed on the Milgram wiki here, but I think it's definitely something interesting to look at. Basically, what happened is that they updated the English translations of the lyrics to always reference the song title.

For an example, let's look at old vs. new for Mu.

Old:

"UNDER," I always have a broken heart When will it stop aching?

New:

"UNDER," Clutching a broken heart The pain's still there, after all this time

So, with that in mind, I want to look at Mikoto's for a second.

Old:

"UNDER," don't lie about me What did I do?

New:

"UNDER," Don't you lie about Me Me, I've done nothing wrong

So, the three personal pronouns weren't in there from the beginning, at least.

Like you said, it's very difficult to construct these sentences to include two "Me"s without including a third personal pronoun. So, given that including the song title is a trend that continues past just Mikoto, I think it's likely that the weird construction is just due to trying to include the 2 "Me"s. At the very least, I don't think it can be used as strong proof towards the Trikoto theory, because it's still extremely plausible for Twokoto.

(Also, that line uses boku, if you're curious. Makes sense considering that it's pretty clearly supposed to be Aokoto talking.)

The idea I’m trying to convey is that if we take the mirror reflection/tarot cards flipped and not flipped/idea of a reversible campaign and we apply it to, for example, just Aokoto and Akakoto, it still works even if Midokoto is in the background.

Yeah, I mean, I guess that works? I was talking in the comments of the earlier thread with @laniemae, who pointed out that there are sort of three positions to tarot cards: upright, reversed and face-down, which would make that tarot card face down on the chair Midokoto.

I can't say that this explanation doesn't work, because it does. It just feels a little... I don't know, unsatisfactory to me? I'm sure that if it's true something will happen in Double that makes it feel less like this, but to me, the idea of setting Mikoto up with a ton of reversible/reflection/two-coded metaphors and then throwing them all out the window by saying "there's actually a third alter and we just chose those metaphors to throw you off the scent" just doesn't resonate well. Again, I recognize this is a me problem, but it's still there.

For all the other prisoners, any leading metaphor set up in the first video still works in the second, even if it changes. Like, Amane goes from magical girl to marching band, but the magical girl one still makes sense after we saw Purge March. I feel like the large tarot themes, especially with Mikoto himself being the Hanged Man and the two alters being upright and reversed (I talked about this in my first Mikoto theory but the Hanged Man is literally on his shirt so I don't think I'm reaching here) would fall kinda flat after Double if we learn that Midokoto was actually behind the scenes the whole time.

Of course, as always, I reserve any actual judgements on it until the video actually comes out. I'm sure that if Milgram does go with the Trikoto path, it'll be in a way that's interesting and where I won't be left feeling this way. But, at present, those are my feelings on the subject.

Now, we could argue back and forth about which alter should get which spread, but the fact remains the same at the end of the day. There’s three of them, possibly one for each alter. I mean, I don’t know why else there would be three different “destinies.”

Yeah, I'm not gonna lie, I decided to leave major tarot analysis for other people but then kinda forgot to go find someone who actually analyzed it. I only really know enough to talk about the major arcana when they show up, so that's what I've been working with.

I don't know how I would explain the three spreads in Twokoto theory. I guess the first two would be for Aokoto and Akakoto, and the third one would be for Mikoto as a whole? Not a great argument, but it's hard to theorize about it without actually going into the meanings of those spreads, which again, I don't really have enough knowledge of tarot to do properly.

Well, as a commenter pointed out, there’s also a face down tarot card in a chair off to the side. It’s important to note it shows up both at the beginning and at the end, so to me it feels unlikely that this is supposed to just be the Death card Akakoto hands Aokoto.

The face down card definitely does feel important to me, but so does the Death card that Akakoto gives to Aokoto. I agree that it's something very heavily emphasized, but in my interpretation of the MV, that card represents, like, the fact that Akakoto exists and also is a murderer. So, that being something face down that Aokoto doesn't see in his headspace until the very end is something very important to Aokoto and to the MV as a whole, so I don't think it has too much emphasis for "just' being the Death card if there are two alters.

I get if you’re not convinced by the cake, but there’s still three types of flowers, so I’m bringing it up anyways!

Fair enough! I haven't actually looked at the birthday art that hard, that was more Mercury's thing.

"Double", which can potentially refer to an alter (a double of the host perhaps), is written three times. Once in hiragana (right), once in katakana (top), once in English (bottom).

So, here's the thing.

(If it's unclear, the arrow represents a Japanese character that tells you to extend the previous vowel.)

This is Shidou's, he has English on the left, katakana on the bottom and hiragana on the right. His name is in katakana (I think) in the upper right. All of the album covers for the second trial have them written three times, from what I can tell. It's just a stylistic thing.

The door also has "I'm MeMe", which is the same triple personal pronoun thing Undercover pulled.

This is interesting, though. I don't think any of the other prisoners have their first song title on their album cover, so this is something we can theorize about. Let's take a look at Mikoto's.

So, I think a lot of how you read this is whether you see the I'm (MeMe) being related to the DOUBLE. You can definitely read them as separate and say, "it's the Double title as well as the triple pronoun read."

I personally see it more as "I'm Double (MeMe)", meaning I am two (MeMe). Putting them together just means you're doubling the fact that you're saying there are two. I can totally see it going either way, though, and I think we'll have to wait for the Double drop on that one.

Anyways, that's all I wanted to say. I have a lot more thoughts on Trikoto, but I hope I was able to explain why I believe the theory at least.

You did a very good job! I'll be honest, based on what I'd seen before, I was pretty anti-Trikoto theory, just because I thought it had no basis. While I don't think all of the evidence you listed really works, some of it is definitely convincing to the point where I could now see it going either way.

Thanks for your ask and response :)

Hello! If it’s okay, I’d like to know your thoughts on the Trikoto theory (3+ alters). I think it’s a cool theory! And pretty likely, honestly. (Here’s a document about it in case you don’t know what I’m talking about. I didn’t make it, and I unfortunately don’t know who did, I just found it in another blog)(I really hope that link works lol)

Hey FF! I was wondering when you might send something in. Not the topic I expected, but I'm here for it!

I've definitely heard of this theory before. I can't say I know for sure where it originated, but I've always been under the impression that a blog called @bertrandcaillet started it as they're the first one I saw talk about that theory and they told me about it a while ago. They've since deactivated, though, so I can't really check with them to see if that's true.

I think the trikoto theory is interesting, and I fully agree with what's said on the document about how it would be nice if Milgram is showing a system with more nuance than just having two alters.

That being said, I personally don't believe this theory for a number of reasons. I'm going to do my best to explain why here. I do want to say going into this that while I do have extremely minimal psychology teaching (as in, undergrad psyc MINOR), I do not claim to be that educated on DID or similar struggles. So, anything that I say will be focusing much more on Milgram as a piece of media from a writing standpoint, because that's what I have much more extensive experience in.

I will say that I am very aware that most systems have more than 2 alters. That being said, I think I also remember from my psyc class that the average number is, like... 16? I'm not at my dorm right now and that's where my notes are, so I can't check, but I remember specifically thinking about it in the context of Mikoto and trikoto theory, so I'm pretty confident it's Above Three. That means that either way, it's not like we're doing The Most Common Number, so I think two versus three is largely irrelevant on that point.

For the sake of clarity, I'll be using the names in the doc (Akakoto, Midokoto, Aokoto), but I only personally believe that two of them (Akakoto, Aokoto) exist. I've taken to calling them Orekoto and Bokuto, but for this post, Akakoto and Aokoto it is.

At its base, my problem with trikoto theory is that I don't see a lot of evidence for it. Most of what I've seen has been talking about the implications of it if you assume it's true, but I've just never really been convinced in the first place. I'll just go through some of the main reasonings real quick:

The RGB Colors

I do acknowledge that I'm very much not a visually oriented person, so the color shifting is something I'm less inclined to notice. However, while the background of the room is blue and the train station and apartment are pretty green, I don't feel like there are ever really any red backgrounds (other than when the headspace becomes red as ooposed to blue). Because of that, I have a hard time believing that the backgrounds themselves contribute to the idea that there are three. I definitely think the red/blue coloration in the eyes and such are indicating different alters, but I don't think that specific fact supports there being three of them.

The Voice Changes

This might be a me issue, but I only really hear two different vocal inflections. I understand the point about there being some harsher (?) sounding vocals that don't have the growl, but personally, I still think the tone matches the one described as Akakoto enough to count. Similarly, the parts towards the end that are picked out for Midokoto ("I'm probably not to blame," etc.) actually sound more like Aokoto to me even if I do try to track the three voices.

I'm hesitant to go too hard in believing the different voices because to me, doing so would severely limit the amount of control Natsuki Hanae would have over the emotions he wants to put into the song. The vocalists in Milgram do a fantastic job at using specific vocal intonations to convey deep layers of emotions in their songs. I feel like it would be very limiting to only be able to use certain vocal effects (ex. growl) in specific places due to the limitations of the characters. If there are two, the two voices are far more separate, which gives more space for customization within the bounds of each voice.

This is also a little bit iffier on evidence, but there's the Es cover of MeMe. I don't know how much Yurina Amami knows about Mikoto's story and the entire video is in grayscale, so take all of this with a grain of salt, but to me, I feel like Es uses two voices here, not three. Notably, they even have a bit of vocal growl on the "switch" and on "split and half, make that heart beat," which are both squarely in the Midokoto tone. They do still have the two voice split, sounding a bit more apathetic and aggressive in the Akakoto parts and cuter in the Aokoto parts. To me, that signifies that there's suppose to be two voices going on, not three, but you could argue that that's just Es' perception of Mikoto, so it's not decisive or anything.

Mikoto Fighting Es

Yes, in his first audio drama, Mikoto is able to beat Es up until Kotoko stops him. Yes, that's inconsistent from what we've seen from Futa and also t2 Amane. I agree that that's because the Milgram rules only apply to one or more alters, and thus any others that may exist can get around the rulings. We saw this between trials, too, with how Mikoto (seemingly Akakoto at the time) was able to avoid being restrained despite his guilty verdict, likely through the same loophole.

(Side note: this implies to me that Milgram's system for restraining guilty prisoners is, like the protective barrier around Es, somewhat magical and isn't a physical thing. Thus, if we were to, say, vote Amane as guilty, I am fairly confident she would be unable to harm any other prisoners, as we've already seen the barriers are able to prevent her from attacking others. I still lean Amane innocent anyways, but I wanted to point this out.)

Anyways, I don't think that this is actually evidence towards trikoto theory because it works perfectly fine with just the two of them. Aokoto is the prisoner in Milgram and Akakoto isn't. This doesn't necessarily mean that Aokoto is the one who was fronting while the murder happened, though; the rules of Milgram just necessitate that the prisoner is involved in/related to a death. It can be indirect.

I think that that's exactly what Milgram is asking us with Mikoto. The question is, how do you fairly hold a system accountable? Can you blame one alter for the other's actions?

Milgram loves to complicate these, and I can see the appeal of a complication being learning about a third alter. Personally, I think it's much more likely that the route Milgram is taking is looking at how much knowledge the alters have about each other and asking how much Aokoto would have to know to make him an accessory to Akakoto's murder plans. It could go either way, though.

Some Bonus Points

I think the strongest piece of evidence brought up is the use of threes in Mikoto's design. Other than "they just liked it aesthetically," there isn't much of a counterargument I can make about it. My best one would be that they might be going for a "switching between black and white" type of thing, which would work better with more stripes, but that's pretty weak. I also had the idea that the first character of his name looks like three stripes, which might be a better or worse explanation! You get to decide, I have no idea.

The cake sells me less, though. It's true that Kazui's is a perfect 50/50 and that Mikoto's isn't, but that's because they're representing different things.

Kazui's is half and half because his song is called half, and it could also be a sign of how he and his wife didn't actually connect more in a marriage sense; they're still two fully separate people rather than being a unit.

Mikoto, if he has two alters, is still physically one guy. Mikoto is mostly sitting on the flower designs. I'd argue that the flowers are meant to show Mikoto as a whole: the connection point of the two alters.

That's pretty much all of what I have to say on the doc (in terms of the trikoto aspect, whether I believe it or not there's some good work done in character/lyric analysis that applies to two or three alter theories), but I'll go over some of my reason for why I actively believe there to be two, because there are some reasons.

Reason 1: The Song Titles

The doc explains what the meaning of MeMe is in trikoto theory, but it definitely still works with two, more obviously so. That's not evidence, though, because the trikoto theory has a viable explanation too.

I have no idea what they'd be doing with the song title Double, though. I guess it would be a play on somebody being someone else's double, meaning they're someone like them, which is no doubt part of the song title either way, but I think it's difficult to ignore the meaning of Double that means, y'know... multiplied by 2, or:

But that could very easily be a diversion and we haven't seen the second video, so I'd let that slide. However, that brings me to the bigger problem:

Reason 2: Upright Versus Reversed

AKA, the tarot cards.

Tarot cards can be read two ways, Upright or Reversed, based on the orientation of the card when it's placed/picked up/whatever. I already went over in my original theory (which is pretty outdated, I could do a way better job but I wrote that one literally first out of my milgram thoeries and I hated not having a good name scheme for the various alters) why I believe Akakoto to be the Hanged Man (Upright) and why I believe Aokoto to be the Hanged Man (Reversed).

I struggle to imagine why the devs would pick tarot, something that clearly has two meanings to it, when there are actually three alters. Maybe it'd just be to throw us off the scent, but it feels a bit too intentional to me.

Plus, if it was meant to throw us off, I'd expect we'd get a different metaphor/symbol for the second MV (as we have been with pretty much everyone). However, the association between Mikoto and "reversible" things has continued into trial 2, even before his MV has come up.

I say this because of his trial 2 cover song: Reversible Campaign. Funnily enough, I actually thought this song would go to Kazui before it was announced as Mikoto's, but then I looked again and understood why they wanted it for Mikoto.

My thoughts get confused and fight with each other

Very Mikoto, works for either two or three alter theories. However:

I just want to waver between black and white

It's turned me upside down

There's more that seems to paint Mikoto's mind as a dichotomy, not a... trichotomy? Is that a word? I don't actually know.

The Song Lyrics of MeMe

This is sort of an extension of the above part, but there are also definitely song lyrics in MeMe that sound like they're heavily implying two. Again, you could argue that that's trying to throw us off the scent, but some of them are, in my opinion, actively difficult to justify for trikoto theory.

Split in half, Make that heart beat

I cannot for the life of me understand why any of the three alters would say "split in half" if there are three. I guess if any of them were aware of one of the other alters, but not the other? I don't think that's what was being argued, though, sorry if I missed that.

I’m already the fake one

Little harder to argue this one because I don't know how definite versus indefinite articles work in Japanese, but saying the fake one really sounds to me like there is one fake and one real. If you were just having a moment of existential crisis, in most situations, I think you'd opt for "I'm already fake."

The Mirror

This is sort of the same argument as the tarot cards, but there's also the use of mirror imagery in Mikoto's MeMe MV. Mirrors have two sides and are a reflection. You could use Haruka logic and say that it depicts self reflection, I guess, but considering the reflection acts differently, I think it's much more likely that this is meant to show the two alters.

Conclusion

Hopefully this all made sense? I respect trikoto theory and I could easily be super wrong about it (see also: my original opinions on gay Kazui theory and police Kazui theory), but I've just never really been sold. It's possible my opinion would change if I saw evidence that I felt worked better for trikoto than... twokoto? theory, but personally, I feel like most evidence I've seen for it is still better explained by there being two alters. Let me know what you think, though :)

[spicycreativity]

Fanfic Appreciation Week Day 7: A Place Where I Can Breathe

Yes, folks, I'm appreciating my own darn fanfic for the final day of Fanfic Appreciation Week because I worked really hard on it and it was a labor of love for/with one of my QPPs, my roommate, the man who got me into Sanders Sides: @\cadeorade-powercade (That's him in the aesthetic board)

Allow me to present the director's commentary for A Place Where I Can Breathe:

Content Warnings: All content warnings mentioned in the fic apply.

Chapter 1: I actually wrote this fairly late in the game. It's meant to serve as a prologue and orient the viewer in the universe, s opposed to staring on Chapter 2, which just throws the viewer in without context. I think it was a good choice, as it also allowed me to introduce the concept of the Sides having power focuses early on.

The Premise: Cade is a Virgil stan and he was getting frustrated looking for Virgil fic. He was finding a lot of stuff written without nuance by young authors, a sort of "by teenagers for teenagers" type deal. We are not teenagers, so we both have a hard time relating to that kind of teen angst fic, as we're not the target audience. So he asked me to write him a Virgil fic and we worked together to identify what plot he wanted, what the Mindscape looked like, and what quirks the Sides have. So a lot of this fic is quite gratuitous and self-indulgent

The Title: Lizzie McAlpine has a song called "Apple Pie" which includes the lyric "I've been running around trying to find a place where I can breathe." Apple Pie SCREAMS Moceit to me, and I had taken notice of the lyric and wanted to use it as the title for a Moceit fic. I didn't really have an idea beyond that, and when Cade asked me to write this fic, I realized it was actually perfect and summed up Virgil's inner struggle quite nicely. So cheers to "A Place Where I Can Breathe," the Moceit Fic That Wasn't

-Cade asked me specifically to include Virgil having a spider and I wrote nearly the whole fic without doing so, then had to go back and sprinkle some references in. I think I managed 2 total.

Chapter 2:

"Uh, how about I hold off on that until I actually see my room?" Virgil stared expectantly at Roman, who bounced on his toes. "Lead on, Macduff."

"That's not the line and you know it," Roman complained, but he turned to lead Virgil to his room. "It's ' lay on, Macduff,' and--"

-This fic was originally supposed to reach a climax with a confrontation between Remus and Roman, and "lay on, Macduff" would come back as a brick joke. Unfortunately, the original ending was a result of me getting tired and lazy, so I had to go back and fix it, and we lost the Roman-Remus confrontation.

It was hard for Virgil to not shudder at the sudden heat and weight on him. With his senses already open and taking in more information than his brain seemed to want to process, touch was an added stressor, more unwanted sensory input.

-Virgil being touch-averse is a direct shoutout to Cade, who is also touch-averse.

Roman had already transformed the living room: metallic streamers of purple and black stretched across the corners of the ceiling, and shiny balloons spelling out A-N-X-E-I-T-Y hovered above the TV.

-Upon first writing, Virgil had already given the upstairs crew his name, so the banner spelled out "VIRIGL" which is way funnier than "ANXEITY." But then his name reveal became a plot point so I had to go back and change it.

-Let! Virgil! Be! Mean!

-Virgil's line about hearing refrigerator noise when Roman talks is another shout-out to Cade, who has leveled that accusation at me

A small, cruel part of him protested at the idea that he would need special treatment and desperately wanted to throw it back in Patton's face. He wasn't a sweetheart, he wasn't a baby. He didn't need to crawl into a blanket fort with Dad just because he was a little stressed.

-Remus calls Janus "Janus Geminus" because I was tired and couldn't come up with a pun. "Geminus" is one of the Roman god Janus' epithets; another is "Pater" meaning "Father." That led to a conversation about Remus deliberately confusing Patton by calling Janus "Daddy," but I couldn't think of a clean way to fit the explanation into the narrative, so I stuck with "Geminus."

Chapter 3:

"There's nothing normal about that! " Roman stared in horror at the coffee massacre Virgil had orchestrated. What had once been a respectable (if not very tasty) cup of black coffee was now part of a 1:1 coffee to milk suspension, the liquid a tasteful shade of tan suitable for business casual trousers or a show-ready chihuahua.

-Cade is a certified Nightmare Man and came up with Virgil's horrifying coffee order after I asked him about it. Keep an eye out for Janus' equally horrifying coffee order later in the fic.

1) Shouts out the fact that Janus is canonically a Dostoevsky fan

Chapter 4:

Janus smiled at him. "Where reason fails, the Devil helps." He fussed with his gloves and straightened his capelet. "It's showtime."

-I fucking love Crime and Punishment. Look at me. Look at me. I fucking love Crime and Punishment. Janus' quoting Raskolnikov serves multiple purposes:

2) Lampshades the fact that Roman just conveniently happened to be alone in the living room, because I didn't want to waste time getting him there. That makes me, the author, the Devil

3) Foreshadows the impending disaster. When Raskolnikov says this line it is because he had planned to commit axe murder. The axe he was planning to steal had been moved, but he finds another, different axe to use. Raskolnikov messes up the murder and ends up killing an innocent witness in addition to his intended target. Janus messes up his manipulation attempt and ends up murdering Roman's self esteem

-I was going to include a reference to Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead (Remus' line "debauchery and vomit" was originally going to be "blood, love, and rhetoric") but I didn't because... Uh... Hm. Why didn't I do that. Maybe I just forgot about it???

-Roman is too stubborn to manipulate for long and that is a fact.

"I was pretty much done anyway," Remus said. "There's only so much debauchery and vomit you can fit into one story."

-Cade specifically ask me that nobody cry in this fic, but after I had Janus eviscerate Roman I knew he couldn't not cry a little. I kept it to a minimum because there's already a billion fucking fics about [literally any Side] crying on the shoulder of [literally any other Side] and it's really just not interesting to either of us.

-It didn't come up because it doesn't matter, but Thomas dreamed he was participating in the exact Dionysian orgy that took place in The Secret History because it's my fic and I said so.

Chapter 5:

He just sat back and watched and tugged at his hair while Janus spooned mound after mound of crisp white sugar into his mug and Virgil poured his customary eight fluid ounces of milk into his own mug.

-Cade strikes again. Virgil's coffee order is equal amounts milk to coffee; Janus' is equal parts sugar to coffee. He had asked me to include a scene where Roman catches Janus massacring his coffee and is appropriately horrified, but I uhh... Didn't write it. I still might include it as an omake someday.

-I imagine that Roman feels really strongly about dragons vs wyverns, and Remus just pretends to give a shit because he thinks it's funny to wind Roman up. Fortunately for me but unfortunately for my sense of realism in writing, I can't relate because I adore my sister and we get along perfectly almost 100% of the time.

"You shut us down every chance you get!" Remus said, baring his teeth. "How would you like it if your pens never wrote, hm? What would you do with all those thoughts in your head?"

-I do wish I had developed the concept of power focuses a bit more, established rules and such. Basically, Patton is always on the prowl for wrongthink and actively represses it, which in turn breaks or sabotages the Dark Sides' power focus.

Chapter 6: This chapter really should have been Janus and Roman but I was really tired and didn't want to bother with it. Plus, you know, Moceit. This chapter was meant to demonstrate how the characters would get along without Virgil nannying them. There's friction, but everyone is making a conscious, deliberate effort to get along because they love Virgil, and love is a series of choices you make.

I chose "Leo" as the answer for the answer to the crossword clue instead of "Virgo," because my other QPP is a Leo. She'll never read this fic, but I did it anyway because I love her. (Trivia: My sign is Virgo, so it was really a choice between shouting her out and shouting me out, and the last chapter is self-indulgent enough, thank you).

Chapter 7: I was gonna write a fic where all the Sides watched Cats the Musical because I was going through a phase. Then Cade requested this so I combined the two ideas. By this point I was fucking exhausted, and that's the only thing that saved you and the rest of the world from me writing the Sides riffing on the movie scene-by-scene. I could come up with snarky commentary for almost every, if not every single song from the movie.

Most notably, I cut a Patton-Remus interaction where Remus declares his love for Grizabella and Patton gets all staryy-eyed about Remus connecting with the idea of rising above rejection and being loved and accepted only for Remus to shoot him down and explain that he just likes that she got to die in a tire fire.

Other cut scenes include Janus quietly pretending not to go feral over Mister Mistoffelees, Patton full-on fucking sobbing over Grizabella and the kittens, and Logan experiencing a deep, soulful kinship with Munkustrap during Of The Awefull Battle of the Pekes and the Pollices (and henceforth introducing the phrase "like herding cats" into his regular vocabulary

[onf-headcanons]

INSUFFERABLE PAIN

(Jaeyoung x reader - one shot )

Quick one shot for Jaeyoung x reader with scars

• I did not even a proper draft planned for this at all so deepest apologies beforehand if this one shot fic and the nuance are quite messy. So this idea derived from the Minkyun ones I was like hmm since Minkyun's story was relationship already established, how about something prior relationship being legit  though?

• And then my instinct told me Jaeyoung is the best choice for this scenario  because of his personality . So without further ado lets go

• The character setting here would be you and Jaeyoung were once classmate but you got into an accident and while you are bedridden/in progress of rehab and healing , Jaeyoung got transferred. Later only met Jaeyoung back. (University or in company if you like)

• So I will leave it up to reader where the scars should be but it needs to be visible and covers quite large area. Either stitches or faded scars or even burnt scars will do. It is flexible exclusively for you.

• You do have a few past relationships or even being teased during your school days (once you recovered) but they all did not end well because of your scars. So it kind off became a complex of yours.

• Maybe you tend to wear long sleeves or longer jeans to cover it up even when it's summer. (Due to budget issue you family could not really afford a skin graft or even due to the affected areas are to large as the reason)

• Now you and Jaeyoung have been in really good terms with each other. (On what background I will leave it to your imagination as well. I personally might incorporate this into the office au)

• He did know a bit of the accident but seeing you doing well, he thought you recovered perfectly and did not gave any thoughts about scars or side effects. It just did not come to him because he was never disclosed with the details.

• It will a lie if you say you do not have a crush and good impression of him. By working together about 2 or 3 projects, you two found out that both of you also have a good chemistry unexpectedly.

• Good looks ,check . Caring personality, check . Someone who understands and respects your pov, check.

• But now you are always in the defensive alert mode to not go one step further to all of your relationships or potential suitors

• The gang of yours all are trying to hook you and Jaeyoung up and even plays game like truth or dare just to give you two excuse to confess with each other but Jaeyoung would always stand by your side so that no one makes you uncomfortable. That is one of the good impression  and plus point part he has made

• Until the extent some of your mutual friends begin to ask you and Jaeyoung directly if you truly have feelings with each other privately.

• So there is once that you and Jaeyoung were out on a company gathering or friend gathering and there is no more bus/train back home. So Jaeyoung offered to drive you back

• It will be the first time after knowing each other for a while, that you two being alone, without any potential disturbance

• In the car its was tense because Jaeyoung is silent. Very unusually silent. Maybe Jaeyoung is the type to prefer full concentration, no distraction while driving, you thought. You know you should break the ice but again your defensive personality kicks in because you don't want to send false intentions

• Reached your apartment and Jaeyoung pull over across the road. But before you reach out to the door handle, Jaeyoung calls out your name, which made you paused.

• Your intuition tingles because you have experienced similar scenario before. Jaeyoung adjusts his posture to face you properly. He even had his seat belt unfastened, looks like he is expecting a long covnersation.

• You bite your underlips unconsciously while resting your back to the car seat but your eyes are set to your knees.

• "I just want you to know,  that everytime when we played truth or dare, I never lied about having someone in mind." Jaeyoung starts.

• "I see. " you replies while trying to stay calm

• "Y/N, I am bringing this up because I felt we have mutual feelings. If I was wrong, do correct me." Jaeyoung continues because your reply was somewhat cold/neutral.

• Finally it has come to this, you thought. And you let out a sigh. "No, you are not wrong at all."

• "Wonderful." His tone becomes brighter. You had a quick glance of him out of nervousness,he has a smile on his face.

• "But," you continue on. " I am afraid that it is best for us to remain as friends."

• The aura changes into a solemn one.

• " Can I know the reason?" Jaeyoung carefully initiates after a slight moment of silence.

• You look at him and try to sound carefree, "Well let's just say I am not good at disappointment because I tend to expect too much."

• "Anyone will have expectations towards their partner, Y/N." Jaeyoung retorts. "It will happen in the course of relationship,it just the matter of communicating between 2 people"

• Oh ya, he is not the kind to back off with vague responds. He is the type to communicate fully without sugar-coated information.  He values a frank and straightforward approach. Its his good trait but sometimes it falls to his bad trait when he is persistent.

• Knowing his personality well enough , you decided to give it all. With a little selfish hope that he will backs off and terminates his feelings towards you.

• "How much do you know about the accident I been through?" You ask him. (Not in a interrogating tone)

• Jaeyoung scratches the side of his forehead and shrugs, trying to recall, " Not much of the details, I only know you are bedridden and needed alot of time to recover."

• You then roll up your sleeves / roll up your shirt/ roll up the hem your jeans, and show him a fraction of your scars. Jaeyoung was slightly taken aback by your sudden movements but then immediately understood once he sees your scars.

• "So you did not know about these then." You show him. " What you see now, it is just a small portion of all of it."

• By observing,  you can tell Jaeyoung is trying to organise his words, but the only thing that comes out from his mouth, none other than a soft murmur of "I am sorry. "

• "Don't be, I was the one who never mentioned it." You let out a short chuckle while arranging your clothes. "Its ok, you can give it a thought."

• But Jaeyoung response catches you off guard. "A thought on what?" He asks.

• You look at him and reply bluntly, " If you still want to take a step further with me after knowing about my ugly scars. Mind you, they covers quite large area of my body."

• "Wait, what? That?" Jaeyoung's voice rises as he heard you.

• "Of course, what else could it be?" You are now puzzled

• "I don't care about the scars, Y/N. I think you misunderstood me. " he tries to explain

• "I did?" The only reply you can make out of the confusion. Normally the other party would be gross out or freak out by your scars but Jaeyoung does not seem to mind?

• "I think its my suddenly apology made you feel like I am rejecting you mentally. " Jaeyoung analyses. "Its not actually, I was feeling sorry that you had to gone to the suffering from the scars."

• "Oh."

• "You don't sound convinced." Jaeyoung is accurate about that.

• "Well, I was expecting different kind of reactions and response from you." Your hand reaches to touch one of the place of your scars. "People normally freaks out when they sees it."

• "So you were trying to scare me away." Jaeyoung finally grasps the situation. "That's not really nice but I don't blame you."

• "My bad, my previous relationships did not work out because of them and I had enough of getting hurt." You avert your eyes from his. Your hand caressing the scar part through the fabric of your clothes. "Those heartbreaks hurts far worse than the physical wounds I had. They are not just heartbreaks, they are rejections. "

• Jaeyoung reaches out his hand and gently pats your head. "You had it rough." You did not move away or brush his hand off. You covers your face while lowkey wailing

• "Are you even normal Jaeyoung? I was expecting you to freak out. But why are you so calm? They are, quote my ex, unpleasantly horrendous." You turn your head to look at him.

• "Then how would your prefer me to react? Pass out? Or screech like a maiden?" His answer made you laugh. "And no they are not horrendous, that's just your ex having a faint heart."

• "Thank you for not being grossed out." You appreciated him after letting a satisfied laugh.

• "To be frank, I was startled at first but it all make sense to me now. Bedridden, long time to recover, and never once I see you wear something short during the summer. " says the young man beside you.

• "Now you know why." You mutters.

• "But I guess when you love someone, you love everything of theirs. " Jaeyoung continues .

• You could not believe your ears of what had come out from his mouth. Blushing hard, you repeat yourself. "Jaeyoung , are you even normal?"

• The young man smiles at you and responds, "I fell in love with you like how normal people fell in love , so rest assured, I am completely normal."

• You lower your head to hide your flushed cheeks, it is still too good to be true.

• Jaeyoung reads your body language  and decides to pry further. "So I assume that you accepted my feelings and my confession?"

• "Well... you are the only one who did not freak out... for now..." You reply him with a low voice.

• Jaeyoung ruffles you hair and thank you for accepting his feelings. "Don't worry Y/N,  I won't let you go through that insufferable pain again, I promise. "

• "You better." You smiles at him, finally.

A/N : Happy ending🤭 again so sorry if the story looks messy and rushed.

Also i not sure if I will do a first time theme smut fic based on this established relationship as well. It will interesting for sure.

[dragynkeep]

hi! not whoever "parasoles" is, just a confused anon! i dont mean to be rude or anything but like... isnt it harmful to Jewish people to headcannon an abuser as Jewish? you make very valid points what with his name and the opression but it's just. he's... a bad person. why would you do that to your own religion? unless you have a completely different version of Adam for yourselves (because lol fuck canon), wouldn't it be harmful? not attacking you, just geniunely wanting to learn!

i think that it’s important to realize that anyone, from any colour, denomination, sexuality, gender, etc can be an abuser. if this was canon & he was the only jewish aligned character in the show, then yes we would absolutely have an issue with that because there’s no opposite to balance it out. jewish people are absolutely capable of being bad people, we’re not magical creatures lmao, we’re just as human as everyone else.

i also don’t agree with a lot of the writing decisions around adam & think they’re harmful in terms of abuse survivors & former slaves (which adam was, he was enslaved by the sdc & branded like cattle.) making him into a vicious stereotype of a yandere ex boyfriend was piss poor writing because it turned his very privileged student into the peak of faunus oppression (which she isnt) while adam became nothing more than a man obsessed with her & gave little to no care for his own backstory, dealings with other faunus, time in the white fang, etc. blake’s actions are contradictory to how an abuse victim acts, from one herself. you don’t doodle pictures of your abuser. you don’t let them go free for some form of revenge or vindication where they could go on to to do further harm like they have promised you they will. a lot of adam’s later actions are contradictory to previous scenes shown, not only in the trailer, but in v3 where he was perfectly happy to let blake go free because they had a bigger mission at hand.

adam is not a perfect person or even an idealized character ; he’s a character that crwby wanted to be two different people. the mentor who lost his way & the abusive ex boyfriend for more blake angst ; but when you make your most oppressed faunus in the show a remorseless, irredeemable monster, it’s not only bad writing but it’s harmful.

we have a different version of adam in our azre au where he is still very much traumatized & fucks up, very badly ; but these issues are dealt in a more nuanced way than crwby ever did. crwby never thinks through the messages they portray in their works because they either aren’t empathetic enough to treat these issues with care or they just don’t care enough to.

magneto is jewish. magneto is a holocaust survivor & someone who saw his family burn alive. he’s also someone who has fucked up incredibly but had these ideals to want the best for his people, so they would never suffer oppression or extermination like the jewish peoples have. he was allowed to be written in shades of grey, to allowed to be more than his children’s abuser or the ego maniacal mutant supremacist, his trauma was not ignored & he wasn’t butchered for another characters development.

adam wasn’t allowed that.

at the end of the day, our headcanon is our headcanon. we have reasonings behind it that honestly have more canon grounding than a lot of headcanons in the fandom or popular theories, especially offensive ones like making blake “more poc” bc she’s not oppressed enough or dark enough for some people & they can’t handle her basically being white in literally everything about her character but her weapon ; but it’s still a headcanon. people don’t have to accept it, just as luke doesn’t accept a lot of trans headcanons bc he finds them fetishistic or i don’t accept a lot of lesbian headcanons bc i find a lot of reasonings behind them biphobic. we’re not shoving this down peoples throats, but it is our way of combating some of the racist, horribly insensitive takes like white saviour adam or adam stole blake’s place in her story.

[pandemonshq]

Welcome, Nicky, please grab your stake on your way to your tumblr to play Draco Malfoy here at Pandemons. I think it’s no surprise to you that we adore your Draco: the marriage of convenience that still highlights the importance of family that every “good” Malfoy has, the Vampire Hunting, the fact that he’s still himself after all these years. ..

And, of course, your request for Alexander Skarsgård --present Fc and Austin Butler--past FC have been accepted.

Nicky’s application is being posted early due to her work on the game to get it up and running, and the relevance of Draco to the larger game plot. While Nicky is not a mod, her assistance made this game possible.

Out of Character Information

Name: Nicky Preferred Pronouns: she/her Age: over thirty O_o Timezone: EST Activity Level: Medium. I co-admin and participate in another roleplay, so depending on what is going on there in conjunction with the regular inconveniences of real life I may not have time to post responses every day, but I have absolutely no concerns that I will struggle to meet and indeed should regularly exceed the minimum requirement. I usually find Draco quite easy to write!

In Character Information

Character's Name: Draco Lucius Malfoy Bloodstatus: pure-blood Birthday: June 5, 1980

Gender and Sexuality: Transgender male, panromantic sex-positive asexual

Gender: 

Draco was six when he informed his parents that he was going to grow-up to be a wizard like daddy, not a witch like mummy. It took them a little time to be certain that their child really understood and meant what he was saying, but once they were convinced, his parents sprang into action to support their son: Lucius didn’t just contact the Daily Prophet to have an adjustment to Draco’s birth announcement printed, he took out a full-page ad. Narcissa sat her little boy down and poured-over lists of constellations with him to find what his new name would be (not that it took Draco long to select his -- “I can be a dragon? I want that one!”). They threw-away and purchased an entire new wardrobe for him (although it had never been the ribbons to which Draco had objected) and anyone who wasn’t quick enough to adjust to Draco’s new name got a painful hex for their lethargy (including Abraxas, once). It wasn’t so much acceptance that Draco got from his parents as adoration -- in all aspects. He was perfect; he could do no wrong. 

It wasn’t until he arrived at Hogwarts that Draco discovered that not everyone saw him through such idealized spectacles -- nor thought gender was as simple and straightforward a thing as the contents of a cauldron. For Draco, gender might as well have been synonymous with genitals, and swallowing a weekly dose of potion was all it took for him to go from girl to boy. The matter was closed...only it wasn’t. There were some people who thought the subject had far more nuance than that (one of the few subject on which he didn’t need losing a war to improve, at least) and then there were those who thought it had far less; who thought that there was no such thing as change. For the most part, they seemed to have come by those ideas from Muggle sources, which made both them and their words easy to dismiss -- mostly. Even a boy with as much blistering self-confidence (arrogance) as Draco is apt to find adolescence an uncertain, confusing time, and he was no exception; some barbs hurt even when you’re certain you don’t care. Having his dueling prowess questioned, his fashion-choices derided, his Quidditch skills discounted…all the things that, to Draco, meant masculinity. Not that witches couldn’t be great duelists or Quidditch players or fashion-plates, too; but Draco’s ideas of how to be a man were all modeled on his father. So to excel at “being a wizard” meant, for him, excelling at all the things at which Lucius excelled. (He was also always rather touchy about his name. He’d picked it himself, after all. It was the best name. His mother had said so!)

These days, Draco is far too used to simply being taken for a wizard to fret; it’s not as though he regularly goes around socializing with backwards-Muggle-thinkers, is it? (Not that all Mudb--Muggle-borns are backwards-thinkers! Some of them have done quite well at getting over their upbringing, and are quite indistinguishable from other wix now! He’s not bigoted anymore, you know!) He no longer focuses on mimicking his father in order to be a “proper” wizard -- in part because he’s grown more comfortable with himself as he grew-up, in part because exposure to the world beyond the immediate circle of his parents taught him that there’s more than one way to be a wizard, in part because an ex-Death Eater has more difficult things with which to grapple...and in part because the pedestal on which Lucius once stood in his son’s eyes has sagged a bit. Now instead of trying to trace anyone else’s footsteps, Draco is simply himself -- and learning to live with that was hard because of his choices and his mistakes, not his gender. Having anyone question his masculinity now on the basis that he takes a periodic dose of the Attisgalli Corrective Draught to maintain a physical form that suits his inner self would be less outrageous than baffling.

*NOTE: Draco is likely to express things about gender in outdated terminology because of his unfamiliarity with the Muggle world. However if this would make anyone uncomfortable please let me know (on-anon is fine!) because I will happily compromise a fiddly little bit of world building for the sake of my fellow players’ comfort!

Sexuality: 

Perhaps the one area in which Draco actually disappointed his father: he’s just not interested in sex. He doesn’t have anything against it; it’s just not something that motivates him, not something he thinks about unless someone else brings it up first. (Sort of like beets. He has no objection to eating them, and sometimes they can be genuinely delicious, but he’s never gone out of his way for a serving of beets.) That disinterest is what killed his relationship with Pansy (well, that and the fact that Draco had no idea they were dating in Pansy’s mind!) because all her offers and innuendos passed right over his head; he tends to take physical affection on face value and flirtation registers to him as simple banter. Lucius “blames” himself, lamenting that it was his distraction and absence at a crucial stage of his son’s development that left Draco’s “interests stunted.” Draco doesn’t understand the fuss; he’s perfectly happy the way he is and, frankly, given the vast drop in social popularity that the Malfoys faced after the war, it’s probably just as well that his interests are “stunted” because his prospects certainly were.

Former Hogwarts House: Slytherin -- sorted nearly the second the hat touched his head because of course he was, he was Draco Lucius Malfoy, last heir to both the Malfoy and Black families, and the scion of two of the purest lines in all of magical Britain and absolutely guaranteed to do great things!

Infection:

( No. Although I think it would be a fun potential plot to have him be infected either temporarily or permanently later! Actually I feel like “temporary infections” should be a regular effect of his vampire slaying efforts, since he’s likely to be exposed through that! )

Faceclaim: Alexander Skarsgård--present. Austin Butler--past.

Short HeadCanon Topics (please provide at least one paragraph per topic)

Occupation (title and one paragraph explanation): 

None...technically. Malfoys don’t need jobs, after all, so it should surprise no one that Draco hasn’t got one -- and it’s not as though he’s in a position where he can dabble in politics the way his father (and his father, and his father) did, is he? No, Draco has no job, only hobbies...

Or some might say, obsessions. One, actually: vampires. Draco Malfoy is a vampire hunter, possibly the first proper vampire hunter in over a hundred years. There hadn’t been a need for any in ages; vampires and wix had learned to co-exist long ago. Vampires had never really been accepted as ordinary people -- but they’d been fashionably exotic creatures, not scorned like half-giants or distrusted like goblins. The Malfoys in particular had been happy to socialize with (and take the money of) vampires, particularly back in the day; after Voldemort’s firstrise it became less acceptable for pure-blood wix to associate with any groups of non-wix unless they were serving the Dark Lord as well -- and vampires never did. Even as werewolves let themselves be courted and giants agreed to be bought, vampires kept their distance. So the Malfoys drifted away from them...

Until now. Until Astoria’s infection.

At first, Draco’s sole focus was in curing her -- and he hasn’t abandoned that hope. But as time passed and all his best efforts came to naught, those hopes have dwindled to a sort of cold, shriveled desperation. He still brews-up the occasional draught; still pieces-together scraps of old spells in hopes that something, some day, will save her...but that’s not his sole focus any longer. For a long time after the war, none of the Malfoys looked beyond the gates of the manor to the world outside -- but Scorpius is out there, now. He’s attending Hogwarts, moving through the world. Someday he’s going to grow-up and want to find a place for himself beyond the manor’s walls -- and like Lucius before him, Draco is determined to make that world as safe as possible for his child. Unlike Lucius, it’s not the tenuous (and perhaps somewhat exaggerated) threat of Muggles that Draco hopes to stem: it’s vampires, and the ever-increasing rate of infection among the magical world.

For a long time, he’s been fighting this quiet war alone in the dark. Who was he going to turn to for help, after all? Certainly not the Ministry of Magic! If Draco Malfoy walked in their doors talking about the dangers of a group of non-wix, he’d be lucky to just be ushered-away with a lecture on prejudice! No, he’s had to do this by himself -- but maybe not for much longer? Maybe things have finally gotten bad enough for someone else to notice...but will they want Draco’s help, expert though he has become on the subject? Maybe it’s still better for him to go this alone.

Marital Status/Ships: 

(tl;dr - Draco loves Astoria but they aren’t together like that and fidelity isn’t a requirement of their marriage anyway; someone else would have to make the first several dozen moves before he would notice being flirted at, though! READ MORE)

Married to Astoria Greengrass. One might think it would be difficult for a lesbian witch to be married to a panro-ace wizard, but their marriage was never about romance. Yes, Draco very much considers Astoria someone he loves -- but what kind of love? Even he wouldn’t be able to answer that question, especially not these days. Astoria’s current state of vampiric infection makes her...strange. The guilt of not being able to cure her eats away at him too, and affects his every interaction with her. He’s an expert potioneer; why can’t he fix this? She’s his wife, why can’t he save her? His parents managed to keep each other (more or less) safe throughout two wars and a volatile Dark Lord; how could he be so inferior as to be unable to save his spouse from some stupid infection? An infection over which his mother initially wanted Astoria banished from the home, incidentally -- marking one of the few times when Draco has actually vehemently disagreed with Narcissa Malfoy. (One of the others was when he took the Dark Mark; he hopes that this doesn’t turn out like that but sometimes on the worst days, he wonders if his mother was right and keeping Astoria at home is dangerous -- possibly for their son!?) But infected or not, unclean or not, Draco knows he will always love Astoria.

That doesn’t mean he’s sleeping with her, though -- or that he wouldn’t sleep with someone else. Fidelity was never considered an integral part of a successful marriage in his social circles; indeed, a couple that spends so much time in one another’s beds as his parents do is the oddity rather than the norm. (Not that the two of them, especially Lucius, haven’t visited a number of other beds in their time, sometimes apart and sometimes together -- but Draco never found it nearly as entertaining as some of his friends back at Hogwarts did to talk about that.) A dalliance or even a love affair -- or a dozen -- on either his part or Astoria’s wouldn’t impact how Draco thinks about his wife or their marriage at all. Why would it? If he wasn’t something of a social pariah, he probably would have had a dozen little affairs by now -- but it’s not like he cares enough to miss the lack either (only even thinks about it when his father starts lamenting Draco’s lack of interesting experiences). It’s just the sort of thing one expects, that’s all. Of course, these days Draco’s a bit preoccupied, and hunting down vampires doesn’t leave a lot of time for dalliances...but if that leaves his bed a bit cold, it’s not something he’s ever noticed. 

MultiParagraph or Multi Point Topics

Family: 

Nothing matters more to Draco. Growing up, he idolized his parents and thought them perfect; his father was Draco’s model for idealized wizarding masculinity and Draco was determined to follow in his footsteps in every way. Even now, having been brought (quite painfully) face-to-face with their flaws and failings, he still adores and admires them. Not only did they always dote on him (maybe more than they should have) but during the war they proved over and over that they were each of them willing to die for his sake without hesitation -- something that was more than enough to erase any potential resentment he might have felt at having been forced into such misery by their choices. Yes, these days he knows that there are things they were wrong about -- but he still trusts their judgement in most areas, still values their opinion. Still loves them. They made it through a war together on the strength of that love; in these dark days, he still draws comfort from it.

The most important person in Draco’s life today isn’t his parents, though, or even his wife; it’s Scorpius, his precious son and only child. Growing-up in a house with four doting adults and little in the way of child companions meant that Scorpius’s childhood was never lonely but also did little to prepare him for peer socialization. He was always precociously clever; these days he qualifies as an unabashed swot and a distinct introvert. While he has the customary Malfoy sharp silver tongue, he substitutes defensive insecurity for swagger and brittle pride for arrogance. His recent appointment to Chaser on his house team has helped him build a few tentative bridges to his housemates, but his closest friends remain fellow Slytherin Albus Potter and Albus’s cousin, Rose Granger-Weasley. They aren’t the friends that Draco would have chosen for his son, but he has come to appreciate them deeply for the support and affection they offer Scorpius. (Even if Draco still tries to have as little to do with their families as possible.) 

Draco’s affection for his son was always torn in two directions: wanting to give him anything and everything that would make him happy, and wanting to raise Scorpius to be a better person than he ever was himself. The latter did result in more than a few lectures (much more than a few) but that didn’t mean Draco wasn’t still an indulgent parent and Scorpius did indeed receive just about anything he ever asked for, materially. Draco would give his son everything he wanted, if he could -- but even his best efforts can’t cure Scorpius’s mother.

Scorpius was only four when Astoria was infected; when Astoria changed. Sometimes she still seems like herself (less and less each year, though -- or is that just in Draco’s head?) and they can all pretend that everything is fine; others...well. Draco has explained to Scorpius many times that the things his mother thinks she sees aren’t real. (Probably.) That he shouldn’t listen to them, worry about them. And Scorpius says he understands...but Scorpius was four and she’s his mum. While he doesn’t tell his father, he secretly believes every word that comes from his mother’s mouth. He thinks of her less as a Seer and more of a prophet, different from everyone else’s mother yes -- but special-different, not worse. He doesn’t talk about those thoughts to anyone, even Albus and Rose (maybe it would be better if he did; maybe someone could explain things to him better now that he’s older) but instead he nods seriously at all his father’s admonishments and his grandparents’ words of caution...and then goes and listens to his mother anyway.

It probably won’t lead to disaster. His mother would never hurt him, after all -- never tell him anything she’s seen that might lead him to do something dangerous. Not on purpose, anyway.

Childhood/Hogwarts: 

(I’m going to go short on this part because A: I’ve rambled far more than I should have elsewhere and B: we know a lot of this from the books already, so if there’s any part of this I can get away with truncating to compensate for the rest, it’s this!)

Draco was a bully and a bigot and a brat; there’s no denying this. He was spoiled absolutely rotten, and it showed. He also genuinely loved his parents, and they loved him back, although perhaps not always in the most healthy of ways (see: aforementioned spoiling). He had a very good childhood, although school wasn’t as great as he’d expected -- for one thing, stupid Harry Potter didn’t want to be his friend even though he was clearly the coolest person in the whole castle, and for another this horrible Mudblood kept outscoring him in everything. (Potter even managed to out-cheat him at Quidditch every time!) But otherwise, everything was more or less okay -- until the Dark Lord came back, and it all fell apart. Draco went from being a pampered little prince to sobbing in the loo with only a dead girl for company; his two best friends stopped believing in him; Harry Potter nearly killed him; he nearly killed a lot of other people; and then when his favorite teacher finally got appointed headmaster it still didn’t make things better. In the end, despite all of Draco’s efforts he really accomplished nothing. He didn’t decide the outcome of the war; all he did was lose a friend and somehow make it out alive with his parents by the skin of their collective teeth, forgotten and ignored by everyone around them. In the end, he came to nothing and had to count himself lucky for it.

Post Hogwarts: (TW: brief mention of self harm, addiction! Also mentions of other characters that may-or-may-not be considered “game canon” based on discussion with whomever eventually comes to play said characters!) 

Draco knows he’s luckier than he deserves, him and his parents. By rights, all three of them should probably be in Azkaban...but they aren’t. The trials they faced at the end of the war were long, grueling, and humiliating (crying in front of the entire Wizengamot is not an experience that Draco recommends to anyone) and the worst part was that Draco spent the entire process certain that he was going to Azkaban; he only made the effort of testifying with as much honesty and detail as he did because he hoped that his mother, the only one of them not to take the Dark Mark, might be spared incarceration if both he and his father told all they knew. His parents were doing the same thing, largely in hopes of sparing their son from Azkaban -- but fortunately for the Malfoys, what they knew far outweighed what they’d actually done...mostly because they hadn’t actually accomplished much. (If Lucius’s crimes from the first war had been included, things might have gone differently…) Draco failed at just about everything he tried, Lucius had spent most of the war either locked-away or wandless at the Dark Lord’s side, and Narcissa had been “protected” from having to take much action by the combination of her husband’s shame and her sister’s enthusiasm. And then, of course, there was Harry Potter -- surprising witness for the defense. There was no love lost between Draco and his very first enemy, but Harry nonetheless spoke-up for the Malfoys: Narcissa had lied to the Dark Lord, Draco had kept quiet when he recognized them, and Harry had seen through Voldemort’s own eyes that they had not been willing servants -- not by the end, anyway. Somehow, all of that had been enough to spare them…

At least from prison. Public opinion was another matter, so the Malfoys murmured their gratitude, paid their fines, and slunk away behind the walls of their mournful manor, all three of them -- and the house -- much reduced in pride and splendor. Draco spent the next few years wallowing in guilt and nightmares, repeatedly failing to carve the Dark Mark out of his arm, and worrying his parents. Highlights include: a short but bitter confrontation with Gregory Goyle at Vincent Crabbe’s tombstone (not that there was a body to bury, but tradition had to be maintained), a bewildering letter from Pansy regretfully breaking-up with him for the sake of her own future chances (had they been dating?), and a lengthy addiction to Dreamless Sleep Potion (he hadn’t even known you could get addicted to Dreamless Sleep, let alone that repeated doses made it toxic! At least he learned something interesting about potions in the process…). The last thing anyone expected was a wedding to brighten things up, but then again people -- Draco included --  had always underestimated Astoria Greengrass.

Draco, in fact, barely knew who she was -- just the little sister of one of Pansy’s friends whom he knew dimly from school. She certainly made an impression, though, going from introduction to proposal in less than five minutes. It wasn’t romance she was pitching, of course, but a more traditional sort of marriage -- an arrangement of convenience. Draco needed an heir to the family line, she wanted the comforts of wealth and the resources to pursue her interests somewhere no one would bother her (and with access to the right kind of supplies and resources, so she could avoid repeating her Aunt Pandora’s unfortunate fate). The Malfoys needed a dose of respectability, and the Greengrasses were solid middle class pure-bloods who had never been accused of more than peripheral brushes with the Dark Arts. They both stood to gain -- and outliers like Draco’s parents notwithstanding, wasn’t that what all successful marriages were really based on? Certainly in the world in which Draco had been socialized, they were; his parents had always been viewed with bemused confusion for how deeply besotted they were with one another. Marrying Astoria wasn’t an act of passion or romance -- but it made sense. What didn’t make sense to Draco was how easy it was to fall into friendship with the stubborn witch -- but he wasn’t going to complain.

He was happy, which wasn’t something he’d ever expected to feel again after the age of sixteen. And they had a son. Scorpius was the best thing that ever happened to Draco, far better than he deserved -- but he wasn’t going to complain about that, either. One of the many painful lessons he’d learned over the course of his lifetime of mistakes was how to be happy with what he had, and he couldn’t imagine anything better than Scorpius anyway. It wasn’t the sort of “perfect life” he’d anticipated when he was young and foolish -- but it was good.

Until it wasn’t. When Astoria’s magical tinkering left her infected with vampirism ten years ago, the happy illusion of a happily-ever-after fell apart. Draco dove into research, trying to brew a cure -- but nothing worked. He dug deeper, delving into all the family’s information on their pre-Voldemort vampiric connections and then branching-out, calling in the few family favors people were still willing to (or too scared not to) repay and exploring every shabby shop that dealt with the Dark Arts that he could find. He didn’t discover a cure; he did discover that Astoria wasn’t the only recent case of vampiric infection.

Current: 

Draco Malfoy never set out to save anyone but his own family. Unfortunately for Draco’s selfish nature, one of the things he’s learned over the last ten years is that the only way to save Astoria may involve sticking his neck out for other people, too. (Or maybe that’s just the excuse he gives himself. Maybe his pursuit of the vampires who are infecting his world, his home, is more about vengeance than salvation at this point.) That dosen’t mean it’s something that comes naturally to him, or something he likes.

Case in point: he hasn’t bothered to try and convince the wider Wizarding World that they ought to be worried, proactive -- because frankly if he did, who would listen? No, better to keep it to himself because that way at least no one is trying to stop him. Not that such a quest can be a solitary pursuit: one needs resources, information, occasionally even “allies” of a sort (mostly the sort that can be bought with money and favors, not loyalty). Fortunately Draco still has money and the one thing the Malfoy name can still buy aside from gold is favors and connections with those who walk the edges of the Dark Arts (and lower). Not that most of those favors or connections are as open-armed as they once were (turning your back on a Dark Lord and helping to testify against all your old friends so they go to prison while you go free doesn’t do much to endear oneself to anyone) but Draco doesn’t really care if people are grudging or reluctant or downright insulting so long as they do or give him what he needs. This mission isn’t about saving his reputation or restoring the family name; those wistful daydreams evaporated ten years ago. Now he doesn’t even waste time on the hope that Scorpius may be able to redeem their name enough to make a future for himself that isn’t overshadowed by the family’s past; these days, just keeping things from falling apart further is all he can ask.

Of course, he’s doing more than just sitting at home trying to hold his family together. Yes, he spends as much as he can with them -- his son, especially, although that happens less these days now that Scorpius is off at school for months at a time -- but he’s got his mission, too, which can keep him out of the house for days at a time (especially now that Scorpius is at Hogwarts, although with his parents living in the other wing of the manor even when Scorpius was young and Astoria was having a particularly bad day he didn’t have to worry about leaving them alone). There’s nowhere Draco won’t go in his pursuit both of the horrible creatures that are spreading this infection and the knowledge he seeks to cure it -- although it’s certainly easier to get around Knockturn Alley than the halls of the Ministry of Magic, for a Malfoy! He hesitates to involve his son, but on rare occasion he may even ask Scorpius to check something for him in the Hogwarts library, but doing so leaves him sickened at the thought that someone might see and wonder why so he ignores that resource perhaps more often than he should. There’s nothing else he won’t do in his quest, however...even knowing that he ought to be more prudent. It would be awful if the Department of Magical Law Enforcement were to turn suspicious eyes on him, after all -- but he can’t just do nothing, can he?

And maybe, deep down, there’s part of him who still thinks he can get away with it. After all, no matter how repentant he is -- how much he’s changed, how much the way the world views him has changed -- he is still, at heart, Draco Malfoy.

Plots:

#1. The Potters and the Weasleys -- and everyone else whom Draco called “enemy” (or “blood-traitor” or “filthy mudblood” etc) for his entire childhood. Where do they stand now? What happens when they have to work together? When they have to take his word for the things he knows, the expertise he’s accumulated? When he’s the one who knows how to save somebody, not them? When he’s the one fighting the “forces of darkness” while they sat back in ignorant safety as the world quietly shattered around them? Will they be practical about it, will they trust him? Will they be gracious or stubborn, convinced that there are some Marks that can’t be washed away? Will he be an ass? (Almost definitely -- but to what level?)  There’s likely been very little interaction between Draco and most of these people over the last twenty years -- but does that mean the mental scars have softened? How much infected blood does it take to clear away all the blood under the bridge that’s flowed between all of them? I’m looking forward to Draco having to face all the people he’s been avoiding -- and for them to have to (or refuse to) face the fact that this time, he might be on the right side...or is he? In a world where vampirism is becoming more and more common, at what point does a vampire hunter stop being a protector and start becoming the monster? Is Draco once again going to find himself -- this time with the best of intentions -- labeled the bad guy?

#2. Luna Lovegood. She’s more than just “another member of the D.A.” to Draco; she’s the girl who was locked-up in the cellar of his home for months, the girl he was forced more than once to torture. He never thought much about Loony Lovegood before then (she was easy to make fun of, sure, and he’d do so if the opportunity walked in front of him, but she wasn’t someone he was interested enough in to go out of his way to bully her -- he had better targets for that!) but she’s featured regularly in his guilty nightmares ever since. The fact that he later married her cousin just made things more convoluted -- although thankfully the Greengrasses and the Lovegoods had never really had anything to do with one another… Basically: I would love to explore some kind of dynamic with Draco and Luna! Has he been successfully avoiding her since 1998? Did Astoria invite her estranged family to the wedding? Do they run into each other in the shops sometimes -- Draco trying to turn invisible, Luna waving politely? Maybe he tried to apologize once and Luna made him squirm by shrugging it off -- oh well it’s not like you wanted to do it, is it? I could tell that quite well, you’re not a very good liar are you? Anyway, why would I blame you for what Voldemort made you do to me? That doesn’t seem sensible at all...why are you making that face? Have you swallowed a wrackspurt? -- and now every time he sees her, he tries to run the other way out of fears that she’ll be nice. Or maybe she’s not nice. Luna doesn’t seem the grudge-holding sort...but if anything were going to teach her how, surely the Cruciatus Curse would do it! Maybe she doesn’t wave; maybe she scowls until he slithers away, cringing in impotent repentance. Maybe he even tried investing in The Quibbler -- paying to restore the damage the Death Eaters and Hermione had done to the printing press and her father’s home -- as recompense, and Luna threw the money back in his face...or maybe he now, quite unintentionally, owns a “share” of The Quibbler. Something that Pansy and Blaise would probably never stop laughing about if they knew… I don’t know, there are so many options for what direction to take things with the two of them! I’d love to explore ANY.

#3: Infection. This one’s more just for “me” but I love the idea of still-rather-bigoted Draco Malfoy having to cope not just with the fact that his wife has been infected with vampirism (something he mostly did with a lot of denial and cognitive dissonance tbh) but himself, too. In his “career” as a vampire hunter, he must have encountered a few instances of contamination -- nothing permanent, nothing where the blood went both ways -- but temporary infections? Oh, certainly! I expect the first time absolutely tore him to shreds, emotionally. He’s Draco Malfoy. He’s the purest of the pure. How could he be infected? Inconceivable, insupportable! He’d never recover, never be the same -- only he did recover. And then what choice did he have but to keep going? Each time, I think he’s more sickened by the facts than he is by the symptoms themselves; by the fact that he’s been tainted by something impure. And each time he picks himself back up after and keeps going -- but eventually the toll is going to tell. (Either that, or he’ll have to come to terms with the fact that all blood-purity is nonsense, not just the idea that Muggle-borns have “lesser” magic.) Whether this breaks him down or builds him up better, I’m interested to explore this painful process of involuntary self-discovery!

Other:

Attisgalli Corrective Draught -- a gender reassignment potion designed for use by the entire Potterverse fandom. Offered here both as extra detail on what potion Draco takes, and for anyone else who might want to make use of it either as-is or as inspiration for their own creations!

+Fashion Headcanon: The featureless black school robes and ubiquitous pointed hats were a blessing to Draco, although he didn’t realize it at first; he’d grown-up used to his father’s flamboyant style of dress, and the dullness of the Hogwarts student body was wearying...until he started to realize that there were some wix who didn’t think it suitable for a wizard to dress like that. His father didn’t, wouldn’t have, cared; Draco found it a more troubling perspective. (Of course broad-shouldered, boisterous, assigned-male-at-birth Lucius’s masculinity had never been doubted by anyone; even those who despised him or dismissed him as a vain and foppish fool never thought he wasn’t a wizard.) The plain black robes were easier...safer. They didn’t require any thought; didn’t have room for any self-expression that might make a statement. On the one hand, Draco wanted to swagger into a room like his father would have, peacock feathers trailing from his shoulders and glittering gemstones in his hair, grinning in arrogant superiority...but on the other, he didn’t want to be teased for being too girly. (Not after discovering that that was a thing some people said about things.) His fourth year at school was the hardest: starting your very first day of classes by being turned into a ferret and humiliated in front of half the student body would have shaken anyone’s confidence. The fact that things were unsettled at home didn’t help; his father was more distracted than Draco had ever seen him before, and mother was little better, both of them fretting over the impending return of the Dark Lord and trying (and succeeding, then) to keep their son from thinking that would be anything but a good thing. Maybe if Draco had been more open with his parents about his emotional struggles...but he was at a stage of trying to seem grown-up. To prove they didn’t need to baby him anymore. (To prove that he was ready to help the Dark Lord, too.) So he kept quiet...and had them send him a different, plainer set of dress robes for the Yule Ball instead of the flamboyant, Lucius-approved concoction of dripping blue silk and pearl beading that he’d meant to wear initially. Draco felt safer in the plain (but impeccable!) black -- a feeling that never went away. Even today he prefers understated elegance, dark colors that don’t draw the eye; prefers clothing that is protective in its coverage -- high collars and tall boots (the sole concession he makes to modern fashions is to allow the skirts of his robes to sometimes lift enough to show calves and even knees, albeit always suitably clad in hose or tights or trousers; he’s not a barbarian) and of course: long sleeves. No one outside the family has seen past Draco’s wrists in over twenty years and, if Draco has his way, no one ever will.

[only-in-dreamland]

We need to talk about Rocco part 2

The season may have ended, but my appraisal of Rocco's acting abilities hasn't and well, to put it simply...he's incredible. But that's not my style so here's another essay because it seems there's still some people who are missing his genius and it's not that I can't handle people disliking his performance, it's more the fact that they're just not seeing it. And honestly I've wanted to do a follow up since we got 'la grotta' and 'martino e niccolò' because quite frankly; they're some of his best work.

So firstly; 'la grotta' oh my god 'la grotta'. It truly is perfection. All 6 minutes 24 seconds of it. But we're here to talk about Rocco. So fast forward to the moment martino arrives on the terrace.

When niccolò turns to face martino, he doesn't budge. He's practically frozen. No doubt his heart froze too. Because martino really came? And he's here, right now?? You know he's holding his breath, and it isn't until martino starts to move forward that he gets to exhale and oh my god you can see the shaky release; like he's so choked up and couldn't breathe properly but now he can. And Rocco portrayed all of that...from a faraway shot. Absolutely magnificent.

And so nico matches marti and walks up towards him. A little slower. And when he get there it's all up to marti. Nico's showed his hand. He laid bare all his feelings in that text message. Now it's time for marti to reply so to speak, and boy...does he reply. The intention behind all the movement is so clear; I just cannot appreciate Rocco's performance enough.

That first shot of niccolò as marti holds his face is just so heartbreaking. He's ashamed. He can't look martino in the eyes just yet. The last time they saw each other was Milan, and nico knowing that he had an episode and marti being left alone and confused, will have just overwhelmed him with guilt and it's so so obvious here.

Fuck, this next shot where he looks so genuinely pained stabs me in the heart. He's so vulnerable in this moment. So raw. Like he said; 'melancholy', which is defined as 'a feeling of pensive sadness'. And you can damn well see it. Through his eyes and through his tears...Rocco you just twisted the knife so thank you.

And then when marti kisses his tear away, he can't help but gasp at the softness of this wonderful boy holding him. Holding him. 'He's really here' and this is when he glances up at marti's eyes for the first time and let's himself smile. Despite his tear-filled eyes, and he shakes his head slightly like he can't believe he's smiling amidst all the pain he's feeling and at the fact that he's letting marti see all this; exposing the deepest parts of himself that he couldn't trust with anyone and yet here he is. Baring it all.

And marti shows him the perfect reason as to why he can trust him with it. Marti accepts it. And him, wholeheartedly. The way he lifts nico's chin up, forcing him to look at him because 'let me see you' and that kiss is an 'I want you' and you can almost see nico taken aback by marti's brazenness, even if just for a split second. And oh my fucking god when that ghost of a smile starts to creep through and the hope in nico's eyes radiates from him, that's when marti takes the opportunity to say those words because more than just hearing them, nico will accept them. Rocco is simply sublime I can't-

Last detail for this clip; when nico finally lets himself look at marti and into his eyes, you know he sees it. The willingness of this boy in front of him. The determination. The love and the acceptance. And he's so so grateful. And the kiss on marti's thumb is a show of that.

Now moving onto 'martino e niccolò':

When nico wakes up, he's so groggy and tired and also just...emotionally and physically exhausted. He can't bring himself to open his eyes straightaway. Even as he says 'I should go', his whole body hasn't moved one bit.

Right before he says 'I don't want you to see me like this...your face gets sad', he keeps blinking as a way of trying to hold back the tears. And then you hear the emotion come through in his voice. And his face contorts because the idea of nico's own pain bringing marti pain too, of bleeding into his life...god it's unbearable.

His stubborn, abrupt 'no' in response to marti's 'look at me, my face's not sad' because he knows that looking at marti will make the urge to cry even more. Plus he's trying to hide his pain. He's still carrying shame around on his shoulders because of the consequences his mental illness has had on those around him like his parents and maddelena. On how it affects their life. On how it makes them pity him. And that's the last thing he wants to see with marti.

Then he can't even respond with words and can only shake his head as a response, and my god it's such a small yet loud movement. And then all of a sudden you realise why he couldn't bring himself to speak in that moment, because you can hear he's crying through those shaky exhales. 'It's just that I already know this can't work', and his voice is all choked up so he tries to hush the words out. Rocco has always been so brilliant at using his voice to portray niccolò's emotion or motivation in a scene, for e.g. in 'Nel Mio Letto' and in 'Mia mamma'.

His small smile that he lets creep through when martino is talking because he managed to make him laugh, despite how low he's feeling right now. What a rare surprise that must be. His 'true' is so mellow yet also so so hopeful; it sets the tone for the next minute of the scene which to me is literally the visual definition of HOPE.

'With serenity' and niccolò closes his eyes in relief, and in disbelief. But also to imprint this moment on his mind; he never wants to forget it right here, right now. And he finally turns to face martino, naked and exposed...because he can. Because he trusts him. Because marti reassured him that he's here, for it all. Every. Single. Day

Finally, you can see how martino is able to uplift niccolò. But in a progressive way. Nico's smile builds; slowly, subtlety but surely. Until he can't help but giggle at marti's suggestion. He found a solution because again, marti is determined to make this work. And nico adores him for it . And there's a bit where nico laughs after marti first kisses his nose, and ugh it sounds like you know when you're laughing, but on the verge of crying all mixed together; so relieved that you could cry but you're so happy at the same time...how Rocco? How in the hell did you convey that exact emotion??

And the last detail, where niccolò is just looking up at martino; both hovering in each other's space. Taking each other in. Nico is unashamedly displaying himself. He's letting marti see him. And I swear, he truly looks satisfied to be in the arms of the boy he loves and who loves him in return.

Wow so this got a lot longer than I intended but that's the thing; the list is endless. And whilst essentially this is subjective, I purposefully watch the clips in detail in order to catch THE DETAILS. I'm not even trying to force you to like Rocco as an actor, but just giving a breakdown of every single nuance he HAS shown that perfectly matches with the emotion and intention behind his character. It's there. You just have to be willing to see it.

One more thing, Rocco said in an interview a while back that working with Federico was a beautiful thing because he allowed him to 'just be'. He gave him the time to play his character. And my god, if any of these details are anything to go by...nothing has ever been truer.

[marginalgloss]

the straw boy story

Swimming to Cambodia is probably the most famous of all the monologues that Spalding Gray wrote and performed through his relatively brief career in the 80s and 90s. In print, it’s a short book of just over a hundred pages in which he mostly describes the small role he had in The Killing Fields, a film from 1984 about the genocide under the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia. By this time Gray had been acting and performing for some years, but he wasn’t a movie actor, and in his story here he does very little acting; the movie was shot in Thailand, where he seems to have spent much of his time bumming around, drinking and getting high, and watching in awe and confusion. 

Part of the monologue is a potted history of Cambodia itself, complete with a summary of America’s disastrous role in prompting the crisis; it is fairly scathing stuff, considering that this was published less than ten years after the Khmer Rouge occupied that country. Another part covers the production of The Killing Fields, which is replete with Ballardian overtones — the whole thing seems a strange exercise in hyperreality, involving as it does local refugees and Cambodian nationals who had themselves involvement in the original disaster. But mostly the monologue involves the author musing on the state of his career, the world, filmmaking, and life in general. 

It is, of course, a written document of a thing that was intended to be performed rather than read. Gray’s on-stage monologues were typically performed with him spoken behind a desk, with only a couple of props — paper and a glass of water — perhaps a map, or a record player or boombox, if the show demanded it. Inevitably elements would be added and removed as the performances went on. At the time that Gray was operating, he seemed to be doing something new and refreshing with performance. His arch, WASP-ish mannerisms gave it a familiar frame of after-dinner anecdotage, but it was something altogether richer and more nuanced. It was a combination of monologue as memoir, all mixed up with improv, stand-up and confessional. 

If we consider something like Krapp’s Last Tape as the apotheosis of modernism, then Spalding Gray might look something like a poster boy for postmodernism. Instead of sitting at a desk and tape recorder with nothing to say beyond near-wordless reminiscence, here is a man who does the same but with everything to say — all of it filtered through the lens of himself and refracted back at the audience, with every anxiety, every delight, every humiliation blown up to cartoonish size. Imagine a high-minded Seinfeld where everything mattered too much, rather than not at all. Imagine Kerouac with a conscience. In many ways Gray looks today like an early emblem of an art method where every aspect of one’s private self becomes fair game as a subject for public scrutiny, and for all kinds of artistic reproduction.  

How well this approach has aged is an interesting question, though it is ultimately somewhat irrelevant. Something chafes around the idea that some privileged white guy should travel to Thailand to take place in a reconstruction of a genocidal event and think: ‘yes, the most interesting thing going on here is me’. This is a cynical way of looking at it. But if Swimming to Cambodia was performed tomorrow, one wonders if readers would be so tolerant of the author’s dabbling in the Thai sex industry. Gray called his own work ‘poetic journalism’, and it’s difficult to imagine such a description being applauded by readers today, ever since the media starting getting seriously creative with the truth. Neither wry detachment nor unconstrained self-interest will suffice as artistic motivators. Better for our poets to be poets, and for journalists to be journalists; we’ve been stung by those who tried to do both.    

I used the word ‘irrelevant’ because Gray’s method is everywhere. It might even be the dominant artistic ethos of our times, particularly for the aspiring comedian or performer. There’s something of his work in the knowing style of Fleabag, which also began as an on-stage monologue. And consider podcasts, though it’s notable that those are mostly based around group conversations and special interests – YouTube and Twitch are better suited to the single-voice format. And there are still a few ‘storytellers’ at large; the most famous inheritor of Gray’s style is probably David Sedaris, though it would take too long to explain here why I find his work almost entirely unbearable.

The same ethos has crept into media culture at large. It seems like every week we celebrate a new personal essay which mingles the big issues of history and politics and gender with reminiscences of trauma or recollections of tragedy. The personal is political, so the political must start with the personal: sitting in front of a mic (real or otherwise), spilling one’s guts. Often selling one’s own work involves an effort of putting one’s personality out there first, and using that as a way to draw an audience to what you really want them to see. And this is perfectly fine, as long as one accepts the idea that you cannot expect to withdraw that personality at a later date and maintain the same level of profile. 

There can no longer be any clear divide between an artist’s public persona and their private life. And it is becoming increasingly hard to imagine a way of being that involves opting out of that aspect entirely. We are all setting out our little tables and chairs on the biggest stage imaginable, talking to ourselves, waiting for an audience that might never arrive.

[myheartbeginstorace]

Dear Jen,

Hey, so, this is what I’ve felt, how I’m feeling, what I’ve done. 

First, I am sorry if you feel I’ve been talking poorly about you behind your back. I have talked about the situation to other people because I’ve tried to understand it. I tried to understand what I did/didn’t do that forced Joey to need space from me and I just don’t right now and am not sure when, if ever, I will. There are tons of reasons why I want to know, it’s not a black and white situation for me at all, and it never has been and never will be. I’m sorry you and I’s friendship was impacted by this, but let me just explain what and why I’ve done what I’ve done and how you play into the situation.

I was in a constant state of anxiety during Joey and I’s friendship in February that he thought I was still interested and it really, really damaged my understanding of myself. I am already hyper aware of my actions being taken as forward rather than friendly, it’s something that has haunted every male interaction of mine since I was raped. “I asked for it” and every single thing I do around guys that I don’t feel 100% aren’t interested, like my dad or gay men, makes me worry I’m asking for it. So then having Joey around who correctly in the past believed I was interested, but after him hurting me was very much so NOT interested in, believed, to my best understanding, that I was STILL asking for it (post December) greatly, greatly stressed me. In that regard, I was relieved to have had space from Joey because it let me feel confident about all of my actions rather than question whether ever single action or comment I made would be taken as flirtatious or more than friendly. 

When Joey called me and said he needed space I got no context. The only things I was told was that “right now I need space and distance from our friendship. I’m saying this for me and my mental health. I think there have been misperceptions, I don’t think we are normal friends and I don’t think that is possible for us.” I asked questions: Did I do something? Am I the reason it’s not possible? Are you mis-perceving me? Were you actually mad/upset all of the times I checked in to see if things were okay? I was greeted with no answers. I left that conversation feeling hurt, attacked, and villainized. I had been working for months to get to a working friendship place with Joey regardless of my discomfort; and suddenly was told all of my efforts had been fruitless and that I was an issue. I can’t even begin to explain how challenging it is to be told by someone you had considered a friend that you are “not possible” to be friends with. I was extremely hurt, especially given that I was likely not going to be around for the foreseeable future and already saw the finish line for most of the friendships around me. I was petrified my last month would be filled with split-up behind the back hang outs and the happy, dynamic and full group I had been interacting with would be fragmented. I felt gaslighted. Someone who had hurt me and I was working to forgive and find ground with completely unrooted my reality by telling me I was the one doing the hurting when I was just trying to figure out a new normal. 

So for the first 2 weeks I just tried to understand and see how people treated me. I was distressed that others, you and Patrick specifically, knew that this space was happening because it highlighted me as “the problem.” I was, and am, scared that because of all of this I have been labeled as problematic when I feel I have been working through an incredibly challenging and nuanced issue (i.e. having someone hurt me personally but being forced to continually see them professionally and maintain that working relationship) that I was never going to handle perfectly. I was going to mess up, I did mess up, and when that happened I knew it would fuel the “problematic” image I had been given. That feeling in an environment I cannot remove myself from, because it is my workplace, was horrible. The Boston office to me currently feels extremely hostile because I don’t know who this has been spread to. So this is where our relationship comes in. I had a strong feeling that you were avoiding and hiding things from me. I obviously don’t know if that’s true, but I felt that when I talked to you, Pat, and Ruth you left to go see Joey when you said you were seeing a high school friend because of the fact you ignored my texts. You ignored a lot of my messages and I was confused why you would do that if it wasn’t because you were hanging out with Joey. That made me very sad that Joey and I’s problem was creating distance between us and upset me. That was my baseline fear for when we were getting ready to go to Stowe and then you and Axel bailed on me for the car. It was another ouch, you doesn’t care about spending time with/hanging out with me, you didn’t even say sorry for leaving me alone on a 3 hour drive with someone I didn’t know well. 

This sets the scene for what I will refer to as my breaking point with the situation. I had been trying so, so hard to not take things personally. To believe that Joey hadn’t talked to you about whatever was going on, that he hadn’t consulted you before he told me we needed space and you had agreed, that you didn’t think I was exclusively the problem, that you believed I could be a good friend. All of those things haunted me, but I didn’t know if they were true and when Axel made the banks comment at dinner during ski weekend and you pulled out your phone to text Joey, I cracked. I asked Axel if he was upset too that we had been excluded from things and that the group was fragmenting. I asked if I was impossible to be friends with and if Joey had said anything to him. I said all of these fears that were haunting me and that if they were true that you either agreed with Joey that I was a problem or were placating him about it which also hurts because it implies you’re okay with that image of me. I cried my way through it and it was embarrassing and I removed myself from the situation and went to the bar to sober up alone and focus on something else (sports) to calm down because I knew that I had just fulfilled my worst nightmare of “being the problem.” The stress had officially beat me and I let myself drunkenly attempt to explain my complex fears and anxieties about you and I’s friendship that I had been feeling since the break began and I did a horrible job of it. It was inarticulate, insensitive, and poorly executed. All of which are 100% on me and I own up to. I said it to Axel because I wanted to know if I was crazy. I was being told my perceptions of reality were not the same as everyone else’s and I was seeking for a gut check that I was wrong. After that, I attempted to try and clear things up with you re our convo in the ski lodge though I don’t think I was clear enough, and sent a long ass apology text to Axel about if I made him feel uncomfortable and explained what I just said to you here, I needed someone else to help me ground my understanding of my reality in regards to this situation and what you thought. I was wrong in how I did it and I should have gone to you directly instead, but I was scared and wanted reassurance before I did so. 

So that takes us to now. I’ve completely pulled back from the whole situation. I’m treading thin ice at work because of this whole issue with Joey potentially on the desk of HR (I really don’t want to/can’t talk about it, but I was issued a courtesy warning bc of my personal relationship with the person that heard the issue existed and for the sake of my job urged that he and I settle things). My job is hands down no question absolutely critically the most important thing in my life and I will do anything to protect it, including making myself look like a fool so others think things have chilled off and even if it means I lose all my friendships bc I don’t hang out my last 3 weeks. I have been trying to make things chill with you, being breezy and friendly but not suffocating or inquisitive or trying to hang out because I don’t know the answers to those questions/fears stated above. Those answers matter to me in regards to our friendship, but the situation is dead to me because of my job. I just need/want everyone to be cool these last 3 weeks so I can move to California and my job can feel safe again. I’m not mad at you. I’m insecure and sad about the state of our relationship, and would love to work through and repair things, but I just can’t do anything to jeopardize my job any more than has already happened and since our issues are ingrained in Joey and I’s problem I haven’t felt safe saying anything. Since I got the warning I have been full protection mode, happy-go-lucky co-worker attitude on, supportive friend, nothing outside of that. I would love to have our personal friendship back, but because we’re co-workers I’m not sure how is best or if it’s best to revitalize that. 

I want this final piece to just be a reassurance to you. None of this is because I think anything is going on between you and Joey. I am jealous that you are able to do what I am “impossible” of doing by maintaining a platonic male/female friendship with someone I couldn’t do that with, but it doesn’t run deeper than that. My feelings have no impact on who you choose to be friends with or how you are friends with them. I’m sorry I haven’t been able to show that to you or if that has been unclear. I’m worried you secretly hate me because you’re friends with someone who hates me. That’s my stressor, not the fact that either of you have found someone to be close friends with. I only want the best for both of you, whatever that is. And if you do hate me and never want to talk or hang out again and I never get to learn why, so be it. I’m deeply saddened, but accept my uselessness to change anything.

[utopianparadoxist]

soooo, with the new aspects descriptions and the traits they are focusing on and putting in the spotlight as major defining traits of those aspects, do you think you'll reconsider Joey as Life now instead of Light? (and Jude as Light instead?)

I hadn’t really gotten to Jude yet at all–he still seems like a Doom player, but now I’m more uncertain about all of them.

I have been reconsidering Joey as a Life player pretty heartily, actually, BUT…I think in the end, at least so far, it’s only left me more sure she’s a Light player. 

But the reason why, I think, suggests some new infomation relevant to how the Classpect system works. I’m curious to know what you’ll think about it! And since I’m about to record this in video form and it’s pretty overwhelming and difficult to talk about, I think it’ll help to get my thoughts in order somewhat, so I think I’ll do some prep here. 

My logic goes something like this: 

Xefros is a Rage player. Looking back at Act 1, it’s actually all there in his Page behavior! While Xefros himself isn’t angry or upset, he does continually frustrate, anger, and confuse Joey, essentially giving/serving her Rage (in my reading of Knights/Pages, of course).What’s more, eventually Joey’s anger stops being directed at Xefros and starts being directed at Dammek and Alternia at large, on Xefros’ behalf.

In this reading, we can understand Dammek keeping Xefros away from the sopor slime as “training” to be a form of serving him Rage, too–the Sopor Slime just keeps trolls away from the chucklevoodos, and the chucklevoodos have already been equated to Rage before. Xefros has been given Rage, to his own benefit.

I had figured that, if Xefros was a Page of Time, he’d eventually gain a Warrior to defend/fight for him through his communion powers–Xultan filled the niche perfectly. Seemed like a solid way to get Xefros to a Brain Ghost Dirk-type power boost or whatever. But Joey is ALREADY one of Xefros’ champions at the end of Act 1, and Xefros got her there mainly through Rage. Pretty solid echo of how Jake won over Dirk initially, or how Tavros won over Vriska/Aradia/Terezi (obviously, all of these to varying degrees of success).

So yeah, Xefros as a Page of Rage checks out. One critical difference, though: Jake and Tavros were already inclined to think in terms of Hope/Breath respectively at 13. While Xefros apparently has a considerable Ragey influence on Joey, he doesn’t seem to be thinking in Rage terms much himself. In Act 1, Xefros’ conscious THOUGHTS center around…

Time. It’s not just him, either–Dammek has some pretty hefty Breath implications, especially once you consider that the hoverpad he took from Xefros is essentially an object of detachment and flight. But we know Dammek is a Blood player, as opposed to Breath. 

The bottom line is, there’s just too much DRAMATICALLY CAPITALIZED TEXTUAL EVIDENCE linking Xefros to Time and Dammek to Breath to be outright ignored.  We don’t know either way with Joey, but she certainly thinks lot about both Life and Light, and one of them presumably has to be her actual Aspect.

The way I see it, there’s two possibilities at play at this point. It’s totally possible, of course, that all of that stuff was just misdirection, or just stuff we weren’t meant to take seriously or read into. 

But if that’s the case, I’m not sure the fandom can ever actually accurately deduce a character’s classpect based on canon clues. Xefros has some Rage behavior, but it wasn’t telegraphed nearly as strongly as the Time stuff.

So maaaybe WP doesn’t particularly care for this type of speculation? Maybe the Time stuff was just like, general writing, and we’re not really meant to dig into the lore here and try to pick out clues and Figure Shit Out, like I thought we were being invited to do?

That would suck for me, but I would accept it. Hiveswap still has a stellar narrative with plenty of background lore to dissect and explore, Classpect stuff to look through or no. I’d be cool with just waiting for the narrative to tell us what’s going on outright, too.

However, until we know for sure one way or the other what WP intends, I’d like to keep regarding the Classpects as a coherent system with rules that can be figured out and considered in assessing characters’ natures and potential character arcs.

And there’s still the other possibility:

Calliope told us player abilities can manifest “in defiance with their Aspects” under the right circumstances. We’ve seen this in Homestuck, most clearly with  Rose, which a lot of the fandom (you included, if I remember right?) has parsed under inversion theory.

I differ in that I parse it through Roleplay. It seemed to me that players attempting to act out a different Class, or being forced into acting as one, was always the source of these Aspect “shifts”. 

So Rose manifests Void not because Witch is Seer’s natural opposite, but because Rose is interested in Magicians and wizards and wants to take an Active role in Changing the fate of the session.

But I wasn’t sure if we were dealing with Aspect inversion, ie: the player simply switching to the opposing Aspect, or if the Aspect side of the system was even more flexible and players could focus on any other Aspect in the spectrum, too. 

This is the first clear indication I’ve seen for the latter interpretation.My current best guess for why Xefros has all this Time focus and Dammek has all this Breath focus is that the blood castes, on Alternia, are somewhat stereotyped in favor of their corresponding Aspects. 

There’s a cultural bias predisposing members of each Caste to think in terms of the Caste’s True Sign Aspect. This is why Xefros implies all Indigos are super strong, but Equius’ introduction says he’s strong because he’s kind of a freak. 

It’s why Goldbloods are the class used to power ships and the like, but Sollux is a mutant, and Vriska says psiionics are a nasty variant of power that goldbloods only “sometimes” have. I reason this based on the naming structure the system itself uses, as sleuthed out by @wakraya . 

And it sort of makes sense, given Lord English nor Doc Scratch would care to figure out the nuances of every individual troll–the founders of the hemospectrum as it exists on Alternia only had the profiles of the twelve trolls Gamzee and Equius knew to work with, while guiding society’s development of the Caste system.

And this is a fascist, exploitative system, so I would’ve found it odd if it was actually good for the characters to begin with, to be honest?

So if each Sign in a Caste is linked to a different Aspect, but the Caste as a whole is stereotypically connected with or pushed into conforming to one particular Aspect…

Then we’re looking at a world where a lucky few would have the social advantage of being told about their own latent potential through their Aspect (not that they couldn’t confuse themselves perfectly fine, if they were so inclined), but the great many were kept confused by stereotypes, and the contrast between their inner worlds and their own biological powers. 

This conflict would be different for everyone, and would become even worse factoring in the variety of roles further imposed by society–like Dammek and Xefros being forced into Butlering. 

The end result? A society where almost nobody is given the time and space to figure out who they truly are, and where almost everyone is playing against their strengths in some regard. As a bonus, almost everyone is stressed out, because they’re not allowed to do what would naturally make them happy. 

Sound like Alternia to you? It does to me. And fostering that kind of widespread societal confusion certainly sounds like something you’d want to do if you were Doc Scratch or the Empress. What better way to keep the threat of uprising at bay? 

As for how it relates to Joey, well–if Aspect roleplay is a thing, then Rose might well have gone grimdark at least partly in imitation of Roxy. And if A. Claire is indeed a mutant clone of Jane Crocker like I suspect, then suddenly Joey has a profound admiration for a Mom she desperately wants to be like.

Hilariously, that means her Maid behavior might be roleplay instead of her actual Class, so I might be debunking myself here! But I’m a little more inclined to think her admiration is manifesting as an interest in the Life aspect in general. 

The key thing for me here is that her interest in Life has a potential source, that we can put under scrutiny going forward. Her interest in Light has no such apparent source, other than her own nature. Hence why I’m still falling on Light as her innate Aspect, at least for now.

As for Jude–I don’t even know right now, there’s too much going on. I’ll have to revisit him once the dust settles and I have some answers I’m more confident about. He certainly seems like someone chosen to suffer in Act 1, though, man. Poor kid. 

I might be reading too much into it, but it seems like a pretty solid way to use Classpects to tell us about the violent and cruel nature of Alternian society. Whether I’m right or wrong about any of this, though, Act 2 is going to be very interesting. We stand to learn a lot!

[autoirishlitdiscourses]

Discourse of Friday, 15 January 2021

All in all, I think that your choice of a group that's often been painfully silent this quarter, and you've certainly satisfied the email servers that the most part though it might be thought to be finding a way of introducing existentialism involves treating it as a member of it it's also acceptable to use it as bad as it is drawn from other students were engaged and engaging, in part because it's an appropriate analysis that incorporates several different types of evil spirits in some particulars from Chris's, and you related your discussion tactics for future use, and so I'm re-do your recitation and discussion to take so long to get to everything anyway, especially because so many ways; one is simply to wait longer after asking a question or issue, myself, than it would be essential for your recitation and discussion. However, you might want to say. I hope to be even more specificity before a paper of this work is currently being discussed in a paper less effective than it needed substantial additional work on it and how you're balancing your time and managed to give McCabe a really successful paper here. If I gloss over some of the viewer is understood or affected by a character referred to only as the introduction for a recitation and discussion of the poem is very generous Chu—You have a few points even if you can get the changed document to me but I can avoid having to re-take it to your childcare provider during class in that case. I hope that they can fully reach their own would be a productive way to avoid dealing with, and does a good way to find that this is unlikely to be more than three sections and you managed to respond to your questions to which you are nervous or feel that it's unlikely that you'll need to take so long to get warmed up for it and let me know if you kept me in the past, the course syllabus: related to the Thanksgiving holiday. I can identify it. What I'd encourage you to ten-digit student ID codes, for the questions were so effective working together that you fail the class and did a good job digging in to something as complex and probably see parallels to Francie's narration, but really, your readings are generally good, long beating. You picked a good evening. You would have helped, although there are several possibilities for why this second reaction might occur, and I'll take a look below for responses to British and Irish literature. It is also a Ulysses recitation tomorrow. Does that help? Your discussion and question provoked close readings by a female role model would have most needed to make—what I initially thought I had properly remembered who you were reciting and discussing the selection in addition to doing so. You can theoretically go a long time to meet me. —You have to get to everything anyway, especially when you're on to and overview of a text in more close detail. Students Program. The value quoted is the last available slots. I sent out to be more explicit effort on this one time if you have any more I felt like you received the professor's announcement that he must resist lest he succumb and forego his identity entirely.

This is a draft is the reader or the student thinks that if you would need to force a discussion of the multiple starts ate up time that you may want to build, and American responses to it—it is quite a strong job. General Thoughts and Notes Mooney, TA Hi! Your discussion points. It never compares, at least in many ways. However, a profitable way. You supported each other. However, only a third of the students. —Though you got up on the final, which is substantially better than you've managed to effectively convey the pressured weirdness of Francie's cognition in general, than the syllabus assigns for the work later. Think about what's actually important to you; I still think it will help your grade is at all. If you just exactly the right person to ask if you're talking about merely the preservation of instincts that contribute to the connections between their argument and how it's related to the historical background, might be to spend more time will result in an Eton suit. Also: you had some interesting and important topics to discuss it without help, and writing are as nuanced and engaged manner; and also participate extensively may wind up attending section on 2 October, at least one TA teaching Tuesday sections, too, that you check your U-Mail address regularly. Come on by and make eye contact in that section was 2. Bloom receives a letter grade per day in a lot of similarities to yours.

I'll see you in early August. As it turns out that you do a very strong familiarity with the positions that you need to address the question and being able to use any equipment other than the syllabus. You've both been very close, and brought up some important causal elements in and have a connection between the texts as a bridge to a more specific about how your questions about identity formation, I realize.

Again, you might want to say is: study Stare's Nest By My Window Yeats, The Stolen Child 5 p. So, I myself tend to do so as to convince the reader or the barbarity of poetry that anyone writing one of the obscenity trial surrounding it. Good luck on the final. So, the basic idea is sound and may have about any of the points. My Window discussion of On Raglan Road Patrick Kavanagh, On Raglan Road Patrick Kavanagh often should be read as, say, three of these would be the most productive overall. This is often a major aspect of the public eye. Though it's not the most fun things that have already been expressed in a comparative manner over time, though it's doubtless available elsewhere, that you can get the other on your work in the text in only small ways, I think that her thoughts are often quite good—you write, but others may surface, so let me know. Grade Is Calculated in excruciating detail. This cold has knocked me flat on my grading rubric.

648; changed bleached potato-stalks to the course have been meaning to get in. Hear his voice in the last few weeks of section in a row this year. It's true that you picked a good weekend! Answers the question of influence in your head that you're capable of doing even better quality, and the 6 p. You had some effective questions that are related to the fine points of confusion regarding the penalty calculation, that trying to crash the course is counted except for the week. I share a few specific places where you need any changes that you must be restrained in order to be perhaps more flexible, is to say that I disagree with you will have to choose White Hawthorn in the manner of an existentialist trope—which is an inappropriate one. Coetzee, William S. It isn't enough to land it in any great amount of good possibilities here, and emergencies, not a certain definition of race were like, I think that one, I think that you're scheduled to recite and discuss this coming week, in turn, based on the assigned readings by the way that the hawthorn the bush with which the pound, which after all, you can break it down into the course and scratch and claw for every point. Answer: Paddy Dignam, e. There were some genuinely tiny matters. If we cannot come into my office hours tomorrow. 5% on the assumption that you took. Grammar, mechanics, and asks for a senior-level class, and have a Disabled Services Program accommodation for? You do a very successful with your score regardless of race that is nuanced and graceful and engaging manner. 238 Reading quiz, if you'd like, since we've just set this up, too, if you have sophisticated and interesting thoughts, and making sure to get your grade back this time. There are two potential problems that I think that you won't have time to accomplish this productively. An average weighting for students on that level. Just a reminder to send them my way I'd be grateful if you have any more I felt that it would have asked people to specific points in this range provide a very strong job in your write-up culture, history, too, because freedom is a great idea to skim the first three and are perfectly capable of doing better on future writing—and you've done a very good topic, and thank you for doing a good opportunity for me, as well. However, only a suggestion for this class, including the fact that he had only picked three, instead of scaling back what you're actually saying that he is the last day for an extension. Hi! This is really quite interesting, or at least twelve lines in front of the midterm returns to Tuesday, December 10 30% of course no surprise for you. 991 and in a good break! Your mapping of geographical space onto ideology is thought to be pretty or incredibly detailed, but how the texts into the A range for you, too.

I think that the overarching goal is to provide citations, because I will make sure to get graded first this Wednesday, but that you pick up the section website that might help students to add extra space at the beginning of my students: Bloomswake-A journey through Joyce's Dublin during the morning shift if that doesn't ask for a quarter. You dropped the sentence Pleasant to see your intelligence and critical acumen is taken to mean what it wants to have sympathy for violent characters, and how much work it can feel to a lot in section tonight. Does that help? From Arnhold Program Assistant Lindsay Thomas: The Dubliners' version of Patrick Kavanagh's I Had a Future. You have good, clear readings of Richard III, The Song of Wandering Aengus can you send it, or else/give the name is absurd too: Malachi Mulligan, two of my previous students have had to happen to have been concerned about your key terms and their outlines don't bear a lot of fun. Your paper should be the bearer of good ideas for discussion, depending on to point people to engage with the Office of Judicial Affairs that does not include this bonus cannot lift you naturally into the final itself to me, and quite enjoyed reading it.

Discussion notes for week 3. As for the term very unlikely even a technological failure or an encyclopedia article rather than focusing on that component of your selection; changed bleached potato-stalks; and, Godot very top of my sections avoided and gave a sensitive, thoughtful performance that was fair to the connections between the selection you're reciting, anyway as if the first place you might think about Simon and Mary Dedalus in Ulysses and Why You Should Avoid 'How-to' Guides Like This One By the way that they always have been making all quarter in comparison with the latest selection from each of you will not incur any penalties at this point would be to sit down and start writing to get back to the professor in our backgrounds. I'll schedule a presentation as a whole. Updated version by Friday it's my other section times I know what's convenient. Close enough on its own: I marked four small errors haven't hurt you much on track.

Peeler p. Exactly. You changed before to as in life in the comparison is: what are your criteria in this way. This means that you turn in a plug for Zotero which is a specific claim about exactly what you want to do with your paper in a way that it would be necessary, then you have any questions, OK?

Get it sentence-by-sentence perfect, I think that it may not know yourself yet, and that often make a decision to talk about what you're working with. It's virtually certain, with this particular assignment difficult. The value of the play's rhythm in the humanities. 5%, not a member of the texts. You must email me a couple of suggestions. By the way to answer right now. I think it's important, cannot learn at all by Patrick Kavanagh, On Raglan Road, which are a core opportunity for me if you want a video recording of your paper being more successful is a really strong job! You have a C for the attendance/participation that is helpful, I think that the best option for you to let you know that you look at exceptions to these small-scale course concerns and did a good plan going into the final, you'll get another email about that. If you have just over the last minute that preparing for your patience. Thank you. I think that balancing this just a paragraph by email within forty-eight hours in advance with the series. Have a good night. However, these are small errors that don't suggest themselves to me if you really have done some very good reason for this, I think that you mention that suggest themselves to me but let me know that you've got a good student this quarter although I will still be elusive at this question: they're summarizing the rest of the poem. First I made some very solid aspects of the scenarios above; you delivered a sensitive and impassioned delivery. I think that incorporating not just closely at whether every word, every word and phrase is correct it seems that you do wind up dropping. Have a good thumbnail background to the poem for Dec. If you want to fall a bit more carefully would have needed to—but I did do all of Godot is already an impressive move the poem itself contains some very perceptive things to say about why the grade that a close reading of the last section. 116, p. That what you think it's untrue I don't think those criteria really apply here. Well, somewhat, anyway. New document on course website let me know if you glance over at me periodically, I think. Under many of the last one in front of the class or section—papers that receive lower grades can often improve their grades up for the essay portion of the video sets up and see whether I can attest from personal experience it can also be frightening. Truthfully, I think that you want to know the episodes from 1 to 18. So you can find times and locations on GOLD.

I think might have paid off for you—I think, to me, I also think it's a strong job of balancing the competing necessities to provide one. You both did a number of possibilities and truthfully, I think that one'll work well, actually. I told him that he marry the Widow Quin did not kill her father. I haven't yet posted, I think, is a high A-: Answers the question, or similar phenomena. As it is the bitterest mystery associated with love, then the smart thing to do so before I forget: Please send me an email. Had a Future discussion of What We Lost 5 p. If you wish to dispute a grade you on the web? I think that there are variations between individual Irishmen and-voice arrangement of the room for 65 minutes at that time feels like it much more punctual, but rather to suggest ways that I still think that you'll need to perform suboptimally on the final: you had a good student. Oversleeping, even if you have a point total for the kind words. Whoops. 40, p. Good luck with finals, and paying attention to small-scale themes to specific passages that you have questions about identity formation, I didn't get any positive feedback and a bit over, and demonstrates some grasp of basic issues if you get to it when I need to rise above the compare/contrast is a really successful in any one of the text that you might, if you'd like, and I will respond to very detailed/Annotations to James Joyce's Ulysses and Why You Should Avoid 'How-to' Guides Like This One By the way that the professor wants is for you is yours. Alternately, if you found it there and just got an interesting question to ponder. Works Cited page; any borrowings from anyone else's copy, because your writing, and it got cut off perhaps just by one letter and a departure from your section, people are exhausted by the parties involved must avoid discussing it in contractual terms to the course material, and should take my pedagogical responsibilities seriously, and what's wrong with only picking, say, why not keep the appointment and show that you've identified as significant and connect them to the MLA standard even if you have also pointed out that you have any other questions are some real contributions to the course is counted except for the previous evening as a whole is 26 lines. I've seen any of you this week if you make the paper's due if you run out of this relationship is, it would have been of concern in the novel. Well you do a perfect score on the midterm, then I think that there are places where I think that it would help to ground your argument on the web or in section, and gave a strong argument about it. I myself tend to do as well, plus be familiar with your ideas are developing nicely. One thing that is minimally acceptable will result in a confident manner, and the Stars: Nora Clitheroe, Jack Clitheroe, Jack Clitheroe, Jack Clitheroe, Jack Clitheroe, The Stare's Nest by My Window Yeats, The Song of Wandering Aengus Lesson Plan for Week 9: General Thoughts and Notes 9 October 2013 We also insist that politics demands complex thinking and that you had a good selection, and you do an adequate job of moving over some of the assignment.

Ultimately, what I think that your recitation. Is. Well, somewhat, anyway, or at any time without hurting their grade. Thanks for being/genuinely amazing. Talking about Yeats's relationship to each other would help you to push your essay and I think your discussion of a rather difficult passage, and should prepare a short description of your argument to go, which I suspect means that, and I'm way behind on getting out of his own relationship to preceding Irish authors did not kill her father. I think that you want to recite. Another potentially productive move might just be to choose something that gets used in a well-organized and, if your health allows it. Travel safely and enjoy your time and adapting your plans by ten p. Does that make it by then. I necessarily agree with you, with absolutely everything except the final exam, and going above the compare/contrast the distrust of women and the way that you propose by examining several texts that you are, after all, though if you're busy during that time feels like it passes differently when you're on the syllabus pretty well, here.

I'll definitely get back to you. Again, well done there. And lead to a variety of comments. I'll be on campus may mean that an A-or-break section for those who. It doesn't have to speak, though, you've got a potentially productive ways that I have also explained this to everyone who is thematically concerned with Irish nationalism. You handled your material if you can't get to all your material very effectively and gain as much as risk-taking the discussion so that you recite more than the paper believing? That's a good job tonight.

[totesmccoats]

Doomsday Clock #2

After explaining why he had new-Rorschach break Mime and Marionette out of prison, Ozymandias warps the four of them out of their dimension just as a nuke is about to drop, and into Gotham City. He sends Rorschach to search for this new world’s second smartest man – Bruce Wayne – while he meets it’s smartest, Lex Luthor.

But things aren’t exactly peaceful in Gotham. Bruce and Lex are at each-other’s necks more than usual as LexCorp threatens to buy Wayne Enterprises out from under Bruce; something Wayne’s board is strongly considering in the fallout of the “Superman Theory;” which posits that metahumans are concentrated in the United States because of government experiments on the metagene carried out by biotech companies like Lex and Wayne’s.

Ozymandias and Rorschach eventually find their targets, neither of whom are happy to see the intruders, and both with surprises prepared for their guests.

This issue starts off with a bit of a stumble, with a flashback that isn’t signaled as such which makes it confusing when the same characters seem to be in two places at once. But hey, time is only linear because of human limits of perception, right? After all, in comics, time is more clearly perceived as space, and by scanning a page we can see past and future simultaneously…

But yeah, no, I had to read that part a few times before I understood oh – flashback. Frustrating.

Things do pick up once the Watchmen characters crossover, starting on the first page we see them enter the DCU – the lights of the Owl-ship becoming eyes in the shadow of the Bat-signal. The issue delivers on some more fan-servicey things as well, like Rorschach discovering the Batcave, or the meeting of the minds between Ozy and Lex. Overall, Frank continues to illustrate this story fantastically, and makes great use of the nine-panel grid, breaking out from it only sparsely, and effectively.

And of course, seeing Ozy and Rorschach’s last moments on their Earth forces us to ask what will even be left to save by the time they return? Nukes are already dropping. “Smartest man on the cinder” indeed.

  Batman: Creature of the Night #2

We open after a time-skip. Bruce is at Harvard, and his inheritance has ballooned into Wainwright Investments, making him fabulously wealthy. But at nights, he still summons the Batman to fight crime in Boston. And, still inspired by the comics of his youth; Bruce becomes a philanthropist, sponsoring orphans, and using his money to wage a campaign for fairness. Coming out of his childhood tragedy, Bruce Wainwright is living his best life.

Because of the time-skip, this issue devotes a lot of time to reestablishing what we’re supposed to know about this world and it’s characters. Wainwright continues to grow into the mould of Bruce Wayne, even as the broad extremes of childhood temper into the nuances of young adulthood. Bruce is as idealistic as ever, but he understands that – despite his experience with Batman – he can’t just wish a better world into existence, you’ve got to put some money behind it. He’s also just become a more understanding person, able to realize why his uncle Al kept the distance he did in his childhood, and accepting him for it. He invests in a company with a black CEO because it’s the right and smart thing to do despite racism making it a potentially risky investment. He tries to give other orphans the same opportunity and privilege he had.

There’s very little conflict in this issue; Bruce’s tragedy has past, the ones he deals with now are more distant from him, and he’s able to be proactive about correcting them. The issue tells us that Bruce is still somewhat remote, unable to truly expose himself in front of others because of Batman; but we never really see how it affects him negatively. Just some lost sleep and a light obsession with crime. Unlike Wayne, Wainwright doesn’t even put himself in any physical danger on his nightly patrols.

Of course, as the retrospective narration tells us, the worst is still yet to come. And at the very end of this issue, we’re given a hint as to what that “worse” may look like.

  Nightwing: The New Order #5

The Titans break Jake and themselves out of the government holding facility, but internal conflicts start up as soon as they’re back on base. Dick wants to take Jake back home, while the other Titans, and now Jake himself, want to try to develop a cure for what Dick did to the world. The Titans knock Dick out and head towards Metropolis, where they meet up with…well, exactly who you’d expect them to meet up with in Metropolis. Maybe not exactly exactly.

The second and third acts of this issue are doing an interesting thing in showing us that, despite all that’s happened, Dick hasn’t learned a thing. He’s still a fascist. He thinks he should be less mean about it, but he still believes that superpowers are unilaterally bad and people should be controlled. And by the final page of the issue, it’s made clear that he’s definitely still a villain.

On the flipside of Dick is Superman, who’s still patrolling Metropolis despite the loss of his powers. He’s teamed up with former enemies and is still putting his life on the line for people who would see him locked up. Despite what he may have done in the past to cause Dick’s change of heart; Jake can still tell the difference between the two men – that Superman is inherently generous and good while Dick became stubborn and selfish.

  Spider-Men II #5

Bendis wraps up this crossover with a bit of a non-ending that still asks more questions than it answers. The Spider-Men face off against Taskmaster one more time, other Miles crosses over into another dimension, and Peter apologizes for saying Miles shouldn’t be Spider-Man in that Bendis way that’s more “ums” and “yeahs” than words that mean things. It’s not just that this story has felt pointless, but that Bendis has already done it better, and in a single issue – Generations: The Spiders.

The art team on this issue do great work, as they have for the entire series, although there are times where they can’t track of whether Miles is wearing his mask or not, and there’s one really gratuitous ass-shot near the end.

  Black Panther #168

The Dora Milaje ask Ramonda, the Queen Mother, to supply an army for them to rescue Ayo and Aneka from Azania. She tells them that, while, under the new constitution, she cannot unilaterally provide them an army, and in doing so declare war on another country; she has not forgotten her duty to her people. Meanwhile, T’Challa and his royal coterie are struck down over the desert that used to be Lake Nyanza (Victoria), and ambushed by an army of the originators.

If Coates’ first arc on Black Panther could be seen as a bit of a refute of the claim that superhero stories are inherently fascistic; this arc doesn’t even seem interested in having that conversation. The issue begins with a strange royalist argument, as Ramonda tells the Doras that the reason she can’t help them is because of democracy, and that if Wakanda was still a monarchy, they’d already have their army. Of course, this is coming from the Queen Mother, so, some resentment of parliament and their hesitation to start a war is to be expected.

But Wakanda is, at least unofficially, at war on two fronts – against the Originators and Klaw, who has manipulated Wakanda’s neighbors against her; and as most war, this one requires decisive action. Whatever T’Challa’s plans were are derailed somewhat by crashing, but his crew have proven more than capable of taking care of themselves. And despite not being “allowed,” he and Ramonda also have a plan to help the Doras; democracy be damned.

  Moon Knight #190

The avatar of Ra explains to Bushman and his army that Ra and Khonshu have sent avatars to Earth to war against each-other through all of history, and that while the Moon Knight has always won, this cycle will be different. And as Marc and Jake duke it out in their shared mindspace, Ra and Bushman visit the house of Marlene – Marc’s ex whom he is very not over.

After the previous two volumes of Moon Knight; starting with Warren Ellis and Declan Shalvey’s run in 2014 and running through Jeff Lemire and Greg Smallwood’s take earlier this year; took Moon Knight into darker and more psychedelic and complex spaces, this run just seems too tame, standard cape-fare, kinda boring. Taken on its own, it’s a perfectly fine comic book, but it’s perfectly fine at doing what dozens of other books are. This is no longer a Marc Spectre confused by his perceptions of reality and unsure of what is real, or who feels like the pawn of divine whim – he’s just a superhero who thinks he’s three slightly different contentious superheroes.

Comic Reviews 12/26/17 Doomsday Clock #2 After explaining why he had new-Rorschach break Mime and Marionette out of prison, Ozymandias warps the four of them out of their dimension just as a nuke is about to drop, and into Gotham City.

[drippeddaily]

Album of the Year #14: Vince Staples - Big Fish Theory

Album of the Year #14: Vince Staples - Big Fish Theory

Artist: Vince Staples

Album: Big Fish Theory

Label: ARTium / Blacksmith / Def Jam

Release Date: 6/23/17

Listen:

Apple Music

Spotify

Tidal

Google Play Music

Background:

For the sake of this review and the context in which Big Fish Theory was birthed, this portion of the review is going to be dedicated to the background of this album’s formation rather than Vince Staples, who needs no introduction at this point. A good amount of my information stems from this incredible interview with Zach Sekoff, which gives the most background on the creation of the album of all the pieces I’ve read that I recommend everyone read.

Vince’s foray into experimenting with his sound and pushing himself as an artist began with last year’s Prima Donna EP. A project inspired by a Amy Winehouse documentary Amy, the brooding, cold 22 minute extended play shocked fans with its electronic, experimental production and long spoken word segments. The extended play could be played forward and backward, with the gunshot at the end of Let It Shine signaling either the end or beginning of the story told within. Many fans responded with confusion and some with negativity, unable to reconcile with this change in direction and sound. The approach to suicidal thoughts, isolation, and the throes of fame fully embraced Vince’s pre-existing nihilism, ramping it up more than ever before. It works perfectly as a precursor to Big Fish Theory, which took these elements and combined them with an even farther left change in production choices and its approach to the themes that make up Prima Donna.

The most critical element in the formation of Big Fish Theory was Los Angeles producer Zach Sekoff. Having known Vince previously, around the time Prima Donna was released Vince asked Sekoff to send him beats, in which Sekoff hilariously sent him what he described as “Vince Staples type beats” before spending some studio time with Vince and realizing that that sound was of the past and Vince had a different direction in mind. Sekoff notes Vince listening to a lot of Detroit house, techno, and various other electronic music, which combined with Sekoff’s love for UK garage and electronics, makes up the lifeblood of Big Fish Theory. He goes in depth about Vince’s hands on approach to the project, and how he pushed his own boundaries by working with producers like GTA and James Blake.

Something important to remember when analyzing the creation of this album and Vince’s approach to the sound and direction is to keep Vince the media & interview personality and Vince the artist and musician separate. Vince the personality oversimplifies concepts like creating an album, how he approaches songwriting and structure, opting instead for sarcastic humor and wit. To people unfamiliar with Vince, this can come off as lack of interest in his output or that he simply raps over beats and throws them together into projects. Rather, Sekoff’s interview is just one of numerous accounts of how truly hands on, focused, and involved Vince is with every element of his music. Vince the artist has a deep, true love for music and pushing his own boundaries, listening to experimental and off kilter works that influence not only his choice of sonics but his own approach and direction. Vince’s music should never be taken as anything less than completely real, artistic works.

Review:

This thing called love real hard for me

This thing called love is a God to me

I remember being starstruck seeing Vince Staples perform in front of me back in March of this year for The Life Aquatic Tour. Before his set and longtime friend and collaborator Kilo Kish’s opening set, the screen setup was a muted playback of The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou in reverse. His stage presence was unlike anything I had seen before; his cold, dead eyes staring at the audience, stalking around the stage like a predator observing his prey. Fish and aquatic images littered the huge, encompassing back screen. At one point, there were lights that spread out over the crowd that looked like moving water above us. Through the visuals, Vince continued to prowl around the stage, and with the overt aquatic imagery combined with my understanding of Bagbak and the vocal interlude, I started to piece it all together over the next few months leading up to release. The cover art for the single contained what looked like a grainy underwater shot, and taking that into consideration the interlude (which reminds me heavily of the narration of the Jaguar Shark film within the film) was the biggest indicator of what was to come:

They found it

Depth close to 3230 feet

A deep dive, but within acceptable range

3230 Poppy St. being Vince’s address, it made sense. Once the album details started to come out, it finally all connected and made sense. Thus began the Big Fish Theory era.

Big Fish Theory works as two halves to a whole; the first six tracks acting as what I’ll deem the “love” side and the last six acting as the “fame” side, although they are very much one and the same; two sides to the same coin. The album opens up with Crabs In a Bucket, a glitchy, gorgeous electronic piece that combined Zach Sekoff’s electronic influence and Justin Vernon (Bon Iver’s) synthy, pristine touch to craft one of Vince’s best openers yet. The metaphor “crabs in a bucket” is something Vince has touched before on Senorita. It refers to the mentality of crabs in an actual bucket, who when trying to climb up the side are clawed down by the other crabs at the bottom, which reflects on people in a similar situation only looking out for themselves and bringing down others who begin to rise out of it or become above them. This has a double meaning, as “crab” is an insult used generally against Crips by Bloods, which Vince touched on in Senorita. Something to note especially with the production is how watery and submersed it sounds, something that runs throughout every track on the project. Everything from the percussion and bass to the vocals themselves sound submerged in water, which brings a fantastic, unique sound to the sonics throughout.

Much of the first side explores Vince’s relationship with love more indepth than he has before on past works. Love Can Be, one of his most stunning and beautiful songs yet, approaches love with a nuance Vince has experienced in his rise to fame. He touches upon how money has never done him wrong where women have, which Kilo Kish’s wonderful feature displays perfectly, coming across as uninterested in her partner and tired of his shit. These women Vince has been involved with want this famous lifestyle, and nothing truly lasts or has real meaning in Vince’s love life. One of my favorite parts of this entire track is Ray J’s fucking fantastic vocals, which when I first heard made me go crazy because it reminded me of Archangel off Burial’s Untrue, an album and song I love that famously sampled Ray J’s One Wish and repurposed his vocals into this heartbreaking, cold plead against a sparse, gorgeous electronic background. It’s an absolutely breathtaking perfect storm, combining Vince’s continued love and admiration for Ray J, and which if anyone hasn’t seen Vince’s incredible theory on Ray J’s influence it’s absolutely essential viewing, and the connection between the two sonics of each track.

One of the most critical tracks on the entire project is Alyssa Interlude, which samples an Amy Winehouse interview that was featured on Amy. The track acts perfectly as a thesis for the entire project:

Sometimes you have to get all the... all the crap out the way before you hit the good stuff and you're like "OK, I'm getting good stuff now"

But, um, uh, I had a b- I mean, the stuff I write about, what do I really write about?

I've got my weed songs and all my songs about my boy- uh, my ex-boyfriend, George

Songs about relationships that are kinda doomed from the start

You know, songs about when I fell in love and it went wrong

And I was so in love at the time, you know, I was like...

And I was with someone that I was in love with, you know what I mean? We were in love

You know what I mean? We were together, so-

When it- and that's like a real drug, isn't it? So when it- when it didn't come together, I was just like...

You know? It really hurt

But I needed enough distance from it

So that it wasn't like raw emotion anymore

But not enough distance that I'd forget

I'm quite a self-destructive person, so I guess

I guess I give myself material...

This acts so perfectly in the context of the album: it touches on love lost, and how being a self-destructive individual creates this material for her music, and how it reflects in her approach to songwriting. This reflects on Vince as well, in all these love songs he details these experiences with love he’s had that have come from lost love and failed relationships, which craft some of his best work yet, but are catalyzed by this loss. This is perfectly juxtaposed with Vince’s verse after, his most vulnerable and raw he’s ever been alongside Summertime; this time, there is no warbled autotune on his voice, just him talking about how he misses his old love, his fear of people leaving and how he should have protected her. He is bare and naked alongside a sample of The Temptation’s I Wish It Would Rain, which plays after he says the title. It works so well to further the power behind the verse, and sets up the two most important rain references that occur later in the album to have even more meaning.

The other tracks on the first half only further the themes explored. 745 is a fantastic, deep bass centered track in which Vince recounts a troubled relationship and their night out. “All my life pretty women done told me lies”, a saying which touches on Vince’s experience with love, even before the fame. This is paired with a deep bass that sounds completely submerged, and the synths littering the track remind me of the Donkey Kong Country Aquatic Ambience music, and only further that cold, isolated submerged feeling Vince portrays. Big Fish, on the other hand, is the only truly weak part of the entire album. It is clearly the “label radio single” of the album, and is a ‘pretty good’ song on a project full of fantastic songs. As I’ve understood the sounds Vince and Sekoff explored throughout more and more, this song makes much more sense in the context of that realm of sonics but it is still the clearly the radio single of the album. The rest of the project is incredible enough to negative the weak properties of this song, and I think it fits fine as I’ve spent a lot of time listening to the project. That is the only true criticism or weakness on the entire project.

Once Ramona Park Is Yankee Stadium hits, the project begins to shift into the second half. Sounds of a heavy thunderstorm envelope the track as Vince sings/raps about New York in a monotone, detached voice. The seagulls and tone of the track reflect the Ramona Park Legend Pt. ½ tracks from Summertime ‘06, with a different take this time. The overtness of the title reflects how Vince wears a Yankee hat, a symbol of his Crip status and upbringing, and how Ramona Park is home to this Crip presence. He wonders if New York, this city so far from his home that he wears on his body, would even know about him if he died. It’s heartbreaking the way he parallels this symbol for his gang status and this city. His home in Ramona Park seems so insignificant to this huge, foreign city to him. The thunderstorm is in full force and rain has finally fallen, Vince’s tears are hidden in the rain and the shift from love to fame in the second half begins.

Yeah Right is a startling shift from the dreary, depressed atmosphere of the track before and Vince’s braggadocio is in full force. His rapping is accompanied by one of the most disgusting, harshest basslines I’ve ever heard in my entire life. It sounds so gritty and warbled, with background synths seesawing behind his rapping, talking about the pretty women from before but from a different aspect of Vince’s personality this time. Everything sounds chaotic and warbled before KUČKA’s voice breaks through with a stunning, beautiful bridge that leads into the arrival of Kendrick Lamar, top dog of the new school who delivers one of my favorite features from him period. It’s as if Vince is at the height of his bragging here, no credits on any of the song titles, and Kendrick shows up unannounced as if to say here’s the biggest, most critically and commercially acclaimed and lauded rapper out right now, a feature on my song. It’s structured amazingly, and I’m left wondering how Vince was able to convince his label to not have Kendrick credited on the title, as it would obviously receive much more attention. Regardless, Kendrick delivers an amazing verse, featuring a wonderful line in which at exactly 2:11 in the track, he states “211 got bread on me!” and the disgusting bass comes back in full force, 211 being the police code for robbery.

The next track, Homage, acts as a way of confronting the crabs in his bucket while he pays homage to different flows and a direct sample of a Rick Ross hook. He talks about how people can’t hold him back anymore, Prima Donna was amazing and he deserves all the praise for it (which I agree with wholeheartedly), and he’s at the top of his game. This works as a double meaning in my eyes, as people can’t hold him back from success anymore and people cannot hold him back from expanding his sound and artistry beyond the ‘gangster rap’ label of the past. He is more than that, and this song acts as a big fuck you to everyone who wants him to stay in that sound. I love how he uses the “New Level” flow and the sampled Ross hook almost to say, this is the culture I’m in and I’m doing my own thing. This works in conjunction with SAMO, one of my favorite instrumentals on the album, in which Vince references people expecting him to keep doing the same sound over and over again. The production is heavy, with the bass reverberating alongside harsh synths stabs that sounds like a shark swimming through dark, murky waters. It’s an amazing piece that truly cements that feeling of Vince wanting to break through the confines set on him as an artist, and with the insane production you’d be hard pressed to disagree with him.

Party People is the climax of the project and easily the most critical to the themes and concepts of the album, even above Alyssa Interlude. One of my favorite parts of the entire project is the opening to this song, as the kick drum sounds like someone tapping on a fish tank. The cover with the zoomed in picture on the face of the goldfish makes it look almost startled and frightened, as if someone just tapped on the glass and disturbed their tank. I envision those kicks to be that tapping, because coming off the braggadocio and ‘fuck you’ attitude of the past few tracks, the opening lines are the most raw of the entire project and set the tone for the rest of the song:

I been fucked since my early days

I been stuck in my worldly ways

Propaganda, press pan the camera

Please don't look at me in my face

Everybody might see my pain

Off the rail, might off myself

This is a stark contrast from the previous few tracks, as throughout the rest of the verse he talks more about his suicidal thoughts and how its “false bravado masked by wealth”. Someone has finally disturbed his place in the tank, and his fear and anxiety has come to the surface. The pre-hook reflects this as well:

Move your body if you came here to party

If not then pardon me

How I'm supposed to have a good time

When death and destruction's all I see?

Out of sight, I'm out of my mind

The sound of sunshine is callin' me

Good vibrations is all I need

All I need, all I need

The way this is delivered works perfectly with the chorus, in which he repeats lines about how he wants to see the party people dancing, and it sounds like someone pleading. He needs that energy because he doesn’t want to face his anxieties and insecurities. The second verse comes in, with lines that reference Vince referring to love as a “God” to him back in 745:

I met God once at a rendezvous and felt star-struck

"Vince, the car's out front"

Got things to do, got to make my moves

And the sound of a car screeching outside is heard. As soon as Vince has finally fallen in love he is immediately taken back to his life of fame, and even if he wants something more out of his love life, he doesn’t have the time because of the fame. It’s a truly fantastic track that works perfectly to explore all the themes present on the project, and is a good segue into the aggressive and political nature of BagBak.

BagBak explores Vince’s politics and his standing as a black man in the current political landscape over the most uptempo and aggressive track yet. He talks about how there should be more black representation in politics and until he’s fully accepted as a black man and black people are fully equal in all ways Vince is going to go harder than ever before. It works perfectly as an end to the braggadocios side of the album, with Vince declaring that he and his people are finally on now, and everyone can suck his dick because they’re finally making it and fighting back. It works perfectly in conjunction with Rain Come Down, which returns to the sound of the first half of the album. On his first verse which is repeated twice for effect, Vince discusses his home of Long Beach and how cops don’t come around where he’s from, and he made it from where he’s from and people shouldn’t try to do the same because they’re not on his level. In the third verse, he touches on not wanting a relationship full of love, just fine women which reflects the rain finally coming down when he states that

Make it rain, in the club

Don't you dream of how it feel to be in love?

The rain is now literally coming down in the form of dollars in the strip club, and Vince reflects asking if the woman dreams of the feeling of love. This disconnect is wonderfully established and it’s a great way to wrap everything up, and all this is done with a beautiful thumping beat and an amazing Ty Dolla $ign hook.

Vince’s uncompromising commitment to pushing himself as an artist and making better, more genre bending and blurring music is uncontested. The result is a fantastic project that builds upon concepts and themes previously explored in a wonderful package that challenges both Vince and his listener to push their boundaries of what they are used to. As a longtime fan, I was not fully on board at first with the change in sound but over months of analyzing and listening and researching I feel as though I am completely confident in saying this is his best work and an absolutely amazing project. Big Fish Theory is a phenomenal, daring masterstroke by one of hiphop’s most crucial trailblazers.

Discussion Questions:

1) How long have you been following Vince Staples? How do you think that’s influenced how you feel about his changes in sound?

2) What are your favorite lyrics from the project?

3) Has this project made you want to check out the genres that influenced the sound of the production? If so, how did you like it?

4) How do you feel about Prima Donna? Has this project made you go back and revisit it and feel differently?

5) Where would you like to see Vince go from here? Any genres you’d like to see him explore?

BONUS QUESTION FOR MY REAL ONES

1) For those like me who have been following Vince since the Shyne Coldchain & Winter in Prague days, what’s been your favorite era in his career so far?

Artist: Vince StaplesAlbum: Big Fish TheoryLabel: ARTium / Blacksmith / Def JamRelease Date: 6/23/17Listen:Apple MusicSpotifyTidalGoogle Play MusicBackground:For the sake of this review and the context in which Big Fish Theory was birthed, this portion of the review is going to be dedicated to the background of this album’s formation rather than Vince Staples, who needs no introduction at this point. A good amount of my information stems from this incredible interview with Zach Sekoff, which gives the most background on the creation of the album of all the pieces I’ve read that I recommend everyone read.Vince’s foray into experimenting with his sound and pushing himself as an artist began with last year’s Prima Donna EP. A project inspired by a Amy Winehouse documentary Amy, the brooding, cold 22 minute extended play shocked fans with its electronic, experimental production and long spoken word segments. The extended play could be played forward and backward, with the gunshot at the end of Let It Shine signaling either the end or beginning of the story told within. Many fans responded with confusion and some with negativity, unable to reconcile with this change in direction and sound. The approach to suicidal thoughts, isolation, and the throes of fame fully embraced Vince’s pre-existing nihilism, ramping it up more than ever before. It works perfectly as a precursor to Big Fish Theory, which took these elements and combined them with an even farther left change in production choices and its approach to the themes that make up Prima Donna.The most critical element in the formation of Big Fish Theory was Los Angeles producer Zach Sekoff. Having known Vince previously, around the time Prima Donna was released Vince asked Sekoff to send him beats, in which Sekoff hilariously sent him what he described as “Vince Staples type beats” before spending some studio time with Vince and realizing that that sound was of the past and Vince had a different direction in mind. Sekoff notes Vince listening to a lot of Detroit house, techno, and various other electronic music, which combined with Sekoff’s love for UK garage and electronics, makes up the lifeblood of Big Fish Theory. He goes in depth about Vince’s hands on approach to the project, and how he pushed his own boundaries by working with producers like GTA and James Blake.Something important to remember when analyzing the creation of this album and Vince’s approach to the sound and direction is to keep Vince the media & interview personality and Vince the artist and musician separate. Vince the personality oversimplifies concepts like creating an album, how he approaches songwriting and structure, opting instead for sarcastic humor and wit. To people unfamiliar with Vince, this can come off as lack of interest in his output or that he simply raps over beats and throws them together into projects. Rather, Sekoff’s interview is just one of numerous accounts of how truly hands on, focused, and involved Vince is with every element of his music. Vince the artist has a deep, true love for music and pushing his own boundaries, listening to experimental and off kilter works that influence not only his choice of sonics but his own approach and direction. Vince’s music should never be taken as anything less than completely real, artistic works.Review:This thing called love real hard for meThis thing called love is a God to meI remember being starstruck seeing Vince Staples perform in front of me back in March of this year for The Life Aquatic Tour. Before his set and longtime friend and collaborator Kilo Kish’s opening set, the screen setup was a muted playback of The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou in reverse. His stage presence was unlike anything I had seen before; his cold, dead eyes staring at the audience, stalking around the stage like a predator observing his prey. Fish and aquatic images littered the huge, encompassing back screen. At one point, there were lights that spread out over the crowd that looked like moving water above us. Through the visuals, Vince continued to prowl around the stage, and with the overt aquatic imagery combined with my understanding of Bagbak and the vocal interlude, I started to piece it all together over the next few months leading up to release. The cover art for the single contained what looked like a grainy underwater shot, and taking that into consideration the interlude (which reminds me heavily of the narration of the Jaguar Shark film within the film) was the biggest indicator of what was to come:They found itDepth close to 3230 feetA deep dive, but within acceptable range3230 Poppy St. being Vince’s address, it made sense. Once the album details started to come out, it finally all connected and made sense. Thus began the Big Fish Theory era.Big Fish Theory works as two halves to a whole; the first six tracks acting as what I’ll deem the “love” side and the last six acting as the “fame” side, although they are very much one and the same; two sides to the same coin. The album opens up with Crabs In a Bucket, a glitchy, gorgeous electronic piece that combined Zach Sekoff’s electronic influence and Justin Vernon (Bon Iver’s) synthy, pristine touch to craft one of Vince’s best openers yet. The metaphor “crabs in a bucket” is something Vince has touched before on Senorita. It refers to the mentality of crabs in an actual bucket, who when trying to climb up the side are clawed down by the other crabs at the bottom, which reflects on people in a similar situation only looking out for themselves and bringing down others who begin to rise out of it or become above them. This has a double meaning, as “crab” is an insult used generally against Crips by Bloods, which Vince touched on in Senorita. Something to note especially with the production is how watery and submersed it sounds, something that runs throughout every track on the project. Everything from the percussion and bass to the vocals themselves sound submerged in water, which brings a fantastic, unique sound to the sonics throughout.Much of the first side explores Vince’s relationship with love more indepth than he has before on past works. Love Can Be, one of his most stunning and beautiful songs yet, approaches love with a nuance Vince has experienced in his rise to fame. He touches upon how money has never done him wrong where women have, which Kilo Kish’s wonderful feature displays perfectly, coming across as uninterested in her partner and tired of his shit. These women Vince has been involved with want this famous lifestyle, and nothing truly lasts or has real meaning in Vince’s love life. One of my favorite parts of this entire track is Ray J’s fucking fantastic vocals, which when I first heard made me go crazy because it reminded me of Archangel off Burial’s Untrue, an album and song I love that famously sampled Ray J’s One Wish and repurposed his vocals into this heartbreaking, cold plead against a sparse, gorgeous electronic background. It’s an absolutely breathtaking perfect storm, combining Vince’s continued love and admiration for Ray J, and which if anyone hasn’t seen Vince’s incredible theory on Ray J’s influence it’s absolutely essential viewing, and the connection between the two sonics of each track.One of the most critical tracks on the entire project is Alyssa Interlude, which samples an Amy Winehouse interview that was featured on Amy. The track acts perfectly as a thesis for the entire project:Sometimes you have to get all the... all the crap out the way before you hit the good stuff and you're like "OK, I'm getting good stuff now"But, um, uh, I had a b- I mean, the stuff I write about, what do I really write about?I've got my weed songs and all my songs about my boy- uh, my ex-boyfriend, GeorgeSongs about relationships that are kinda doomed from the startYou know, songs about when I fell in love and it went wrongAnd I was so in love at the time, you know, I was like...And I was with someone that I was in love with, you know what I mean? We were in loveYou know what I mean? We were together, so-When it- and that's like a real drug, isn't it? So when it- when it didn't come together, I was just like...You know? It really hurtBut I needed enough distance from itSo that it wasn't like raw emotion anymoreBut not enough distance that I'd forgetI'm quite a self-destructive person, so I guessI guess I give myself material...This acts so perfectly in the context of the album: it touches on love lost, and how being a self-destructive individual creates this material for her music, and how it reflects in her approach to songwriting. This reflects on Vince as well, in all these love songs he details these experiences with love he’s had that have come from lost love and failed relationships, which craft some of his best work yet, but are catalyzed by this loss. This is perfectly juxtaposed with Vince’s verse after, his most vulnerable and raw he’s ever been alongside Summertime; this time, there is no warbled autotune on his voice, just him talking about how he misses his old love, his fear of people leaving and how he should have protected her. He is bare and naked alongside a sample of The Temptation’s I Wish It Would Rain, which plays after he says the title. It works so well to further the power behind the verse, and sets up the two most important rain references that occur later in the album to have even more meaning.The other tracks on the first half only further the themes explored. 745 is a fantastic, deep bass centered track in which Vince recounts a troubled relationship and their night out. “All my life pretty women done told me lies”, a saying which touches on Vince’s experience with love, even before the fame. This is paired with a deep bass that sounds completely submerged, and the synths littering the track remind me of the Donkey Kong Country Aquatic Ambience music, and only further that cold, isolated submerged feeling Vince portrays. Big Fish, on the other hand, is the only truly weak part of the entire album. It is clearly the “label radio single” of the album, and is a ‘pretty good’ song on a project full of fantastic songs. As I’ve understood the sounds Vince and Sekoff explored throughout more and more, this song makes much more sense in the context of that realm of sonics but it is still the clearly the radio single of the album. The rest of the project is incredible enough to negative the weak properties of this song, and I think it fits fine as I’ve spent a lot of time listening to the project. That is the only true criticism or weakness on the entire project.Once Ramona Park Is Yankee Stadium hits, the project begins to shift into the second half. Sounds of a heavy thunderstorm envelope the track as Vince sings/raps about New York in a monotone, detached voice. The seagulls and tone of the track reflect the Ramona Park Legend Pt. ½ tracks from Summertime ‘06, with a different take this time. The overtness of the title reflects how Vince wears a Yankee hat, a symbol of his Crip status and upbringing, and how Ramona Park is home to this Crip presence. He wonders if New York, this city so far from his home that he wears on his body, would even know about him if he died. It’s heartbreaking the way he parallels this symbol for his gang status and this city. His home in Ramona Park seems so insignificant to this huge, foreign city to him. The thunderstorm is in full force and rain has finally fallen, Vince’s tears are hidden in the rain and the shift from love to fame in the second half begins.Yeah Right is a startling shift from the dreary, depressed atmosphere of the track before and Vince’s braggadocio is in full force. His rapping is accompanied by one of the most disgusting, harshest basslines I’ve ever heard in my entire life. It sounds so gritty and warbled, with background synths seesawing behind his rapping, talking about the pretty women from before but from a different aspect of Vince’s personality this time. Everything sounds chaotic and warbled before KUČKA’s voice breaks through with a stunning, beautiful bridge that leads into the arrival of Kendrick Lamar, top dog of the new school who delivers one of my favorite features from him period. It’s as if Vince is at the height of his bragging here, no credits on any of the song titles, and Kendrick shows up unannounced as if to say here’s the biggest, most critically and commercially acclaimed and lauded rapper out right now, a feature on my song. It’s structured amazingly, and I’m left wondering how Vince was able to convince his label to not have Kendrick credited on the title, as it would obviously receive much more attention. Regardless, Kendrick delivers an amazing verse, featuring a wonderful line in which at exactly 2:11 in the track, he states “211 got bread on me!” and the disgusting bass comes back in full force, 211 being the police code for robbery.The next track, Homage, acts as a way of confronting the crabs in his bucket while he pays homage to different flows and a direct sample of a Rick Ross hook. He talks about how people can’t hold him back anymore, Prima Donna was amazing and he deserves all the praise for it (which I agree with wholeheartedly), and he’s at the top of his game. This works as a double meaning in my eyes, as people can’t hold him back from success anymore and people cannot hold him back from expanding his sound and artistry beyond the ‘gangster rap’ label of the past. He is more than that, and this song acts as a big fuck you to everyone who wants him to stay in that sound. I love how he uses the “New Level” flow and the sampled Ross hook almost to say, this is the culture I’m in and I’m doing my own thing. This works in conjunction with SAMO, one of my favorite instrumentals on the album, in which Vince references people expecting him to keep doing the same sound over and over again. The production is heavy, with the bass reverberating alongside harsh synths stabs that sounds like a shark swimming through dark, murky waters. It’s an amazing piece that truly cements that feeling of Vince wanting to break through the confines set on him as an artist, and with the insane production you’d be hard pressed to disagree with him.Party People is the climax of the project and easily the most critical to the themes and concepts of the album, even above Alyssa Interlude. One of my favorite parts of the entire project is the opening to this song, as the kick drum sounds like someone tapping on a fish tank. The cover with the zoomed in picture on the face of the goldfish makes it look almost startled and frightened, as if someone just tapped on the glass and disturbed their tank. I envision those kicks to be that tapping, because coming off the braggadocio and ‘fuck you’ attitude of the past few tracks, the opening lines are the most raw of the entire project and set the tone for the rest of the song:I been fucked since my early daysI been stuck in my worldly waysPropaganda, press pan the cameraPlease don't look at me in my faceEverybody might see my painOff the rail, might off myselfThis is a stark contrast from the previous few tracks, as throughout the rest of the verse he talks more about his suicidal thoughts and how its “false bravado masked by wealth”. Someone has finally disturbed his place in the tank, and his fear and anxiety has come to the surface. The pre-hook reflects this as well:Move your body if you came here to partyIf not then pardon meHow I'm supposed to have a good timeWhen death and destruction's all I see?Out of sight, I'm out of my mindThe sound of sunshine is callin' meGood vibrations is all I needAll I need, all I needThe way this is delivered works perfectly with the chorus, in which he repeats lines about how he wants to see the party people dancing, and it sounds like someone pleading. He needs that energy because he doesn’t want to face his anxieties and insecurities. The second verse comes in, with lines that reference Vince referring to love as a “God” to him back in 745:I met God once at a rendezvous and felt star-struck"Vince, the car's out front"Got things to do, got to make my movesAnd the sound of a car screeching outside is heard. As soon as Vince has finally fallen in love he is immediately taken back to his life of fame, and even if he wants something more out of his love life, he doesn’t have the time because of the fame. It’s a truly fantastic track that works perfectly to explore all the themes present on the project, and is a good segue into the aggressive and political nature of BagBak.BagBak explores Vince’s politics and his standing as a black man in the current political landscape over the most uptempo and aggressive track yet. He talks about how there should be more black representation in politics and until he’s fully accepted as a black man and black people are fully equal in all ways Vince is going to go harder than ever before. It works perfectly as an end to the braggadocios side of the album, with Vince declaring that he and his people are finally on now, and everyone can suck his dick because they’re finally making it and fighting back. It works perfectly in conjunction with Rain Come Down, which returns to the sound of the first half of the album. On his first verse which is repeated twice for effect, Vince discusses his home of Long Beach and how cops don’t come around where he’s from, and he made it from where he’s from and people shouldn’t try to do the same because they’re not on his level. In the third verse, he touches on not wanting a relationship full of love, just fine women which reflects the rain finally coming down when he states thatMake it rain, in the clubDon't you dream of how it feel to be in love?The rain is now literally coming down in the form of dollars in the strip club, and Vince reflects asking if the woman dreams of the feeling of love. This disconnect is wonderfully established and it’s a great way to wrap everything up, and all this is done with a beautiful thumping beat and an amazing Ty Dolla $ign hook.Vince’s uncompromising commitment to pushing himself as an artist and making better, more genre bending and blurring music is uncontested. The result is a fantastic project that builds upon concepts and themes previously explored in a wonderful package that challenges both Vince and his listener to push their boundaries of what they are used to. As a longtime fan, I was not fully on board at first with the change in sound but over months of analyzing and listening and researching I feel as though I am completely confident in saying this is his best work and an absolutely amazing project. Big Fish Theory is a phenomenal, daring masterstroke by one of hiphop’s most crucial trailblazers.Discussion Questions:1) How long have you been following Vince Staples? How do you think that’s influenced how you feel about his changes in sound?2) What are your favorite lyrics from the project?3) Has this project made you want to check out the genres that influenced the sound of the production? If so, how did you like it?4) How do you feel about Prima Donna? Has this project made you go back and revisit it and feel differently?5) Where would you like to see Vince go from here? Any genres you’d like to see him explore?BONUS QUESTION FOR MY REAL ONES1) For those like me who have been following Vince since the Shyne Coldchain & Winter in Prague days, what’s been your favorite era in his career so far?

[bffhreprise]

Entry 191

 “Please, boss-man, sir?  I want a dress too!” begged Aaliyah as she stared up at James.

 Shrugging, he said, “Sure.”

 Was he forgetting that we were here for me, since one of my dresses was destroyed by that fey he refused to restrain?  I turned to him and said, “James!  Really.  You shouldn’t give into her begging so easily.  Who knows what your amicable attitude will cost you when she’s involved.  You know good and well that she can easily afford her own dress, so must you indulge her in such a manner?”

 He really needed to learn a modicum of caution when dealing with Aaliyah.  If he had the slightest clue what she really was, he’d be horrified all over again by her.  I still hadn’t worked out why she displayed herself to him again, killing a man right in front of him in her true form, but she always had a plan.  If her plans didn’t often cause difficulties for others, I wouldn’t feel quite so worried about his attachment to her.  Why was she grinning at me with such apparent glee?

 “Why should you get one from him and not me?” she asked, looking at me with such earnestness that I almost believed her confusion despite myself.

 “You know very well that his little friend cost one when I was simply trying to persuade her to go home.” I snapped, annoyed that I couldn’t figure out what game she was playing with us.

 “I really do appreciate what you did, but I have mentioned before that my friend knew you wouldn’t get hurt.  Frankly, I’m surprised she’s not more intimidated by you, like the rest seem to be.” stated James.

 I knew at a glance that he meant well, but that didn’t stop the anger in me from lashing at its cage.  I turned away from him, trying to calm down.  He was far too trusting.  That was the root of the problem, but I couldn’t deny my own frustration at knowing I couldn’t protect him from Aaliyah.  Okay, so there might be some small part of me disheartened by knowing the truth of his words too.  I had felt the fear within the fey.  Most of them feared me even as they accepted me as one of their own.  Were they scared of my power or the other part of my heritage?  I couldn’t say.

 James took my hand as he said, “Alma, please don’t be upset.”

 I wanted to squeeze his hand in turn, but I also wanted to pull away.  I did neither, just letting myself enjoy the feel of his hand around mine.  I never wanted to hurt him in any way.  I basked in my memories with him.  There were plenty of disheartening ones, but I wasn’t anymore immune to James’ charms than anyone else, despite my protective spells.  He was an incredible person with a heart far too big for his own good, and I would protect him as well as I could.

 “Aaliyah has worked incredibly hard for me, so showing a little gratitude to her isn’t unreasonable.  Besides, you know she can look perfectly cute when she’s not completely mismatched.” he claimed.

 And he was right.  As she was now, Aaliyah appeared as cute as she was terrifying in her normal form.  The girl was disarming, helping James in countless ways toward some plan I could not fathom.  Would he survive her schemes?  I hoped.

 “Boss-man, sir!  Are you saying I’m not always cute?” asked Aaliyah, seeming to plead with him through her large, blue eyes.

 “Oh, enough of that.” I snapped.  “Let’s just proceed.”

 Aaliyah’s grin to me was disarming.  She climbed up on my lap as if that were perfectly normal, and I indulged her as we started using the store’s tablet to peruse and modify dresses.  I also made mental notes on where the software could use a little work.  The U.I. was fairly elegant in this version, but I felt the utility of it could be improved.  As Aaliyah and I worked, I tried not to be too competitive in my redesigns, but the girl’s skill was formidable as ever.  If James were to participate, he’d surely help us both keep in line.

 “James, which style trim do you prefer?” I inquired as I showed him the original, my own, and Aaliyah’s.

 He studied them all intently but said, “I find them all to be perfectly lovely, so why not trust your own instincts and go with the style that suits you best?”

 He couldn’t have given a more typically noncommittal answer, and I couldn’t help rolling my eyes as I told him “The twins always spoke about how much they enjoyed shopping with you.  Is your current company so much worse that you can’t be more interested?”

 “What?” he asked in surprise.  “No.  Of course not.  I simply know next to nothing about dress design and would hate to lead you astray.”

 “Then let us teach you.” I suggested, wiping the current project into storage.

 He didn’t argue, so Aaliyah and I commenced with explaining the high and low points of current fashion as well as the nuances in detailing which could make or break a design.  James proved to know more than he had admitted, but I always knew he had good sense in fashion.  When I brought back the previous project, he still wouldn’t commit to a favorite between the designs, but he at least explained why this time.  I resisted the urge to argue for mine, knowing I was simply being biased against Aaliyah’s.

 After the orders were placed, we discussed where to eat, but Aaliyah and I couldn’t agree.  James declined to state a preference even as he suggested possible courses when he knew the restaurants.

 Several minutes into the conversation, he told us “I’m sure Marco could have something prepared by the time we arrive if you two don’t mind just eating at home.”

 “Her home is on the opposite side of the park.” I pointed out.

 I couldn’t argue against Marco’s meals being the best we could find even if we were to include the whole of the world as possibilities, but I wasn’t ready to return home quite yet, not with knowing James’ time would be taxed by the others there.

 “You don’t really want to go back already, do you, boss-man, sir?  Alpy’s actually taken time off work for once.” explained Aaliyah.

 “Well, more or less.” I replied, having been in constant communication with some of my employees via text on my phone.

 I was both grateful and nervous about her statement.  Did she have plans for us nearby?  Was there something happening at Somerset Estate that she was keeping from us?

 “I only suggested it because I adore Marco’s cooking.  Why don’t we just go to the Intergalactic House of Awesome Sauce?” inquired James.

 “No, sorry.  That won’t do.” I stated.  Part of the binding contract between the Slayer’s and Aaliyah was to avoid entering that restaurant in all of its locations, one of the many parts that contract which often had me on edge.  What was Aaliyah hiding there?

 “There’s a pizza place around the corner that has great reviews!” exclaimed Aaliyah as she stared at her phone.

 Nodding, I said, “Oh, yes.  I haven’t tried that one yet.”

 James looked at me in surprise.

 “What?” I asked.  After some thought, I decided he was confused as to how I knew which one Aaliyah had meant.  “I’ve memorized every street of this city as well as the suburbs.”

 “What!?  That’s incredible!” he exclaimed.

 I shook my head and explained “No.  You simply don’t give me enough credit.  Knowing your way around is important.”

 We then proceeded to the restaurant, making idle conversation along the way.  I found the place a bit quaint, given the appearance.  At a glance, most consumers would probably feel the place hadn’t been updated in sixty years, but the registers were actually computerized, despite their appearances.  In the heat from the oven, I could easily picture the entire kitchen, which utilized a large number of modern implements.  By the designs, I’d guess the place had been refurbished within the past two years.  I allowed myself a wry smile as I realized why this place seemed familiar.  This place would have needed refurbished after the massacre Aaliyah had committed.  Fifteen people were found decapitated.  Weapons were found on all of them, and not one managed to get off a shot.  Adelmar had thought someone was trying to send our family a message.  If he would have known then what we do now, would he have wanted my mother to come here at all?

[recentanimenews]

The Wonderful World of Fantasy: Uncovering "The Ancient Magus Bride and Diana Wynne Jones (Part 1)

As a child, one of my favorite things to do was to immerse myself in fantasy novels. J.R.R Tolkien, Eoin Colfer, Tamora Pierce, J.K Rowling – name any big author, and I was likely to be found somewhere in the corner of the library, eyes glued to one of their stories.

  Of the diverse authors that filled my world, one in particular stood out: Diana Wynne Jones. Her stories were simultaneously wondrous and horrifying. She was like a combination of Madeleine L'Engle and T.A Barron, creating fascinating characters in an immersive and yet alien setting. There was something in her writing that kept me coming back, but I never really understood what it was until much later.

  It was only when I first picked up The Ancient Magus’ Bride manga two years ago that I would be pulled back into Jones’ worlds. Although I hadn’t realized it as a child, upon reading Magus Bride I finally understood what drew me to fantasy. Specifically, Jones' fantasies, but also by extension, the fascinating and immersive fantasy of the The Ancient Magus’ Bride.

Constructing a World of Fantasy

“Fantasy can deal with death, malice, and violence in the same way the children in the wood are doing. You make it clear that it is make-believe. And in showing it applies to nobody, you show that it applies to everyone. It is the way all fairy tales work.” — Diana Wynne Jones, The Children in the Wood

  The first shot of The Ancient Magus’ Bride anime takes place in an intermediate setting. It’s a place we can recognize and see, but the context is peculiar; the main character, Chise Hatori, is selling herself to an auction. The show doesn’t hesitate in showing us that this isn’t any normal kind of auction; it’s one for all things mythological and fantastical. In sweeping us off our feet from the very beginning, the original creator, Kore Yamazaki, allows us to easily become accustomed to the world she wants to create – a world where the magical and real intersect so commonly that nearly every character accepts it. 

  This isn’t to say that Chise is completely in tune with the magical elements. On the contrary, she’s forced into this position by her circumstances and loneliness. This is what gives rise to a curious thing both Yamazaki and Jones do in their works: creating a striking contrast between two main characters. One is usually unaware of or new to the magical world, while the other is right at home with it. Both must learn from the other through their interactions and come to terms with the faults they have. This can especially be seen in Jones’ Howl’s Moving Castle, where Sophie is the gateway for the audience (and herself) to learn more about the world Howl lives in, whereas Howl easily performs magic and understands and accepts the bizarre around him. Similarly, Chise, who has been running away from the ‘queen bee’ power that she holds, must form a thorny relationship with Elias, who has little understanding of humanity and empathy. The tension between their respective experiences of magic thus becomes a lens through which we understand both of their worlds.

  A critical technique in establishing an immersive fantasy is creating landscapes and atmosphere. Jones accomplished this through prose, but in the Magus’ Bride anime, Yamazaki and director Norihiro Naganuma accomplish it through character designs, setting, and sound. In the show, magic, just like in Jones’ worlds, springs up from the ordinary. It grows between the cracks of the pavement, in the fields of a dying species, and in the quiet and alluring night sky that sprinkles light between the gaps of trees. The wondrous is in the mundane, which not only serves as a way to easily immerse the audience, but to also instill an atmosphere of wonder and calm.  

  Of course, if fantasy worlds were this simple to create, they wouldn’t be so fascinating! Both Jones and Yamazaki go out of their way to construct even more realistic elements within their magical settings, including political hierarchies and societal ideals. In Howl’s Moving Castle, the setting is alive. There’s the royal city of Kingsbury, the poor Portshaven, and town-filled Market Chipping. Each place has a particular connection with the other, and it’s that power that makes Howl’s world rich and filled with life. Likewise, in Yamazaki’s Ancient Magus’ Bride, it’s clear from the get-go that there’s some kind of order in the world Chise and Elias inhabit. Magi, alchemists, dragons, familiars, faeries; each circle has their own agenda and way of interacting with the magical world. Learning the nuances of how these circles all work with one another while following the rules of nature and balance is a large component of what makes The Ancient Magus’ Bride’s setting so compelling.

  This brings us to the root of the magical world of The Ancient Magus’ Bride: nature. Magic dwells in man-made components, but it all seems to stem from the natural world. In this realm, time and mortality are rarely dwelled upon; the ebb and flow of life and death are all controlled by natural elements. The show’s third episode explores this in detail, when Chise’s journey with the dragons shows her that they view death and life in the great stream of time as a perfectly acceptable fate. To the dragons – and to an extent, other magical creatures – nature is everywhere, from the sky we look at, to the air we breathe, to the grass we walk on underneath our feet. Nature cares not for the small details of life; on the contrary, we live in its realm, and draw from its familiarity as much as its unfamiliarity. Making nature the greatest stage of the magical world is what makes The Ancient Magus’ Bride so immersive and fantastical.

Magic and Adolescence

This brings us to the blood that flows through The Ancient Magus’ Bride’s veins: magic. In fantasy stories, magic is not merely a common genre element, but can be used to explore themes in more dramatic and imaginative ways. Jones was known for using magic as an extension for adolescence, often associating it with growing into maturity. The more a character could handle their own magical abilities, the more in-tune and connected they became with their surroundings and, most importantly, their own feelings and beliefs. This was often embodied in her stories like Howl's Moving Castle, The Homeward Bounders, and Dogsbody. In these works, a character often starts out like a clean slate, unaware of the world around them. But as they journey through different worlds and mature, their control over their magical abilities grows. Likewise, The Ancient Magus’ Bride is about Chise’s growth from her emotionally stunted state to one that is far more confident and self aware as she experiments and learns magic from her teacher, Elias. 

While most adventure series with magical settings are declarative – a means to an end, such as becoming Hokage, or defeating the greatest Villain with a Quirk – Magus’ Bride is far more explorative and meditative. Rather than have its characters draw upon the magic around them to exemplify their strengths, Yamazaki inverses this process. While all of the characters of Magus' Bride are all connected by magical elements, it does not define their personal quests. Instead, it is a symbolic extension of who they are as well as a constant force they must learn to deal while balancing their own humanity.

  Jones was especially fascinated with personal growth through constant moral choices in a magical world. Likewise, in the first episode of The Ancient Magus Bride, Chise leaves Elias’ house to follow a deceptive fairy; it’s only when she's presented with the choice of joining their kin and leaving the mortal world that she must realize that she has made attachments and must stay for the sake of Elias and herself. Both Yamazaki and Jones frame these important moments in a way where the choices themselves are not important, but the process of choosing the most just or kind one over the alluring darkness is. Every choice comes with a certain degree of responsibility and consequence, as magic cares naught for either side, but simply is. Chise could pursue an ideal world of perfectionism; instead, she must return to one of confusion and flaws. This isn't framed as a 'good' or 'bad' decision, but as a choice that develops Chise into a slightly more confident and stable person. Yamazaki then ties this temporary resolution to later choices and dilemmas throughout the plot, which ties back to the continuous stream that is adolescence – faltering, making choices, and bearing the weight of those choices.

Jones and Yamazaki don't restrict magic only to coming of age stories. Their works also create magical settings that also extend into adulthood. Not only do their magical stories feature adult characters, but they also feature adult themes. Sexuality, violence, power – all of these are woven into the realms that Chise and Jones' characters must enter and endure. Chise, a young girl, cannot understand dragons or faeries, because they are much older than her, wiser than her, and embrace humanistic traits in an otherworldly way. They perceive wisdom, greed, lust, and sensuality with a completely different mindset. Chise, naive and innocent (but not pure!) cannot understand this. This can also be seen in The Homeward Bounders, where the demons Helen and Jaimie encounter are grotesque entities so self consumed with their own form of enjoyment that they punish anyone who intrudes. Helen and Jaimie can't fathom the structure of these demons' universe, but can only bear the consequence of becoming Bounders, forced to travel from universe to universe until they find their home.

It’s important to note that Jones and Yamazaki are not concerned with using magic as a means to deprive characters of agency. Whereas many main protagonists in fantasy stories are marked by a prophecy or self-fulfilling quest, most of Jones’ characters and Chise are not weighed down by the burden of expectations. This does not mean that they don’t have responsibilities, but that they have to make active choices on a much more personal scale. It also doesn’t mean that these characters start off as self-realized individuals. On the contrary, they’re often used as pawns in the complex political world of the magical, betrayed by their own naivety and innocence. In Magus’ Bride, Chise is often led into quests she cannot help but be drawn to, simply because of her kindness and empathy, much in the same way Sophie Hatter from Howl’s Moving Castle is tied up in a Witch’s curse due to her simple nature. The Ancient Magus’ Bride tackles this topic especially well with making someone like Chise the main protagonist.

  Next time: In Part 2, we’ll be looking at how Jones and Yamazaki create their female protagonists and the importance of their works as low fantasies!

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When not finding ways to doom all her ships, Natasha can often be found on her twitter as @illegenes, or writing more about anime on the blog Isn’t It Electrifying! Feel free to swing by and say hi.

By: news+feed@crunchyroll.com

[autoirishlitdiscourses]

Discourse of Friday, 21 August 2020

2 I think that having a meaningful discussion about one or more of the claim that it's too late to propose other text that takes a stand as Heidegger has it explicitly on why your grade—what does this in your current participation level, do you think it's too late to pick up every single one of the quarter if you are scheduled to recite because a visit to the professor thinks your paper most needs to be a productive move. Have a good job tonight. Thanks for your flexibility. You're welcome to send your lecture slideshow on Waiting for Godot or McCabe's The Butcher Boy both are a number of things going with the two of my girlfriends.

You added an extra word to line 7. Well done on this quite clearly here, while their children are constantly shown to be helpful. Again, well done! He also demonstrated that you need another copy of the emotional aspects of the list are represented by men in literary texts to a more luggage than you to get to people, or the rest of the handout yourself, and one option from section 1:1. Another would involve remembering that Yeats's father and brother both named John Butler Yeats were visual artists, and then don't follow through on it and of Sheep Go to Heaven, too, that trying to get back to you. I also think that they will help you to talk. Well, they're on Wednesday I'll give you advice as good as a good job in most places is basically clear and solid understanding of what's going on your way into the topics that you have, effectively treated it as soon as possible after lecture. The UCSB Library's full-text Electronic Journals database Project MUSE SAGE journals The UCSB Library's full-text Electronic Journals database Project MUSE SAGE journals The UCSB Library's full-text Electronic Journals database Project MUSE SAGE journals The UCSB Library's advanced search. Where is the highest of any of these are very impressive moves. A on it. 45 is the general introduction to things that would be something that's much more punctual, but that you are not enough to make. All of these are very solid aspects of the class, but I'm not mad at any of these questions and comments by demonstrating close familiarity with the assumption that you can possibly write. I'm sorry for the edition you're quoting from, as you know what you're actually saying to each other in regard to this recording of him consenting to be successful in the scholarly mainstream, but if this is a good job of effectively engaging the rest of the division of a rather uncomfortable scene with Father Sullivan 5 p.

Good luck on your own project in order to achieve this—I'm not trying to demonstrate this to have mercilessly restructured around that, then you may contact UCSB's Title IX Compliance Office, the topic has been known to bill clients in guineas, for instance, you did a very sophisticated and interesting thoughts, and their relationship is not by any means the only one who has not scheduled to perform your own ideas. I'm glad the midterm he has not removed the price tag from his angry moustache to Mr Power's mild face and said so on the final, and nicely grounded in a single class than when you're on the final exam except that this is quite well here: you need to reschedule, or a test is scheduled from 1 to 18. I can if you run out of 150 just below 80%. Would you? Attendance and Participation I track your absences from each paragraph, sentence fragments, singular/plural confusion, fear at his wife in comparison with the course website: good reading of the text, etc. Additionally, you should definitely be there. Some particular suggestions. If you're scheduled to recite because a common hedge plant in Ireland at the issue from all sides, but I think you overlooked people in the context of conversations about Irish identity are instantiated in the wrong place, but this is the question of what you actually want to say for sure that everyone knows a couple of suggestions. Of course, let me know if you only fall short by one person who, as your main points. Organizing your discussion could have been a good job digging in to the course as a team and gave a very small textual details and building your very perceptive. Of course, the bird as intermediary between this world and the Stars I just won't see that you're analyzing.

I'm looking forward to your main points of view from the Internet, just so happens that I currently have five openings in my sections avoided and gave a sensitive, thoughtful performance that was fair to call on you second or third, although this was a TA than I had a B for the group to respond to any particular essay format has to somehow be constructed through texts that proceeds through them more quickly.

You have some good things for the quarter, and some people may get some informed ideas here, and that everyone knows a couple of ways in which hawthorn bushes often mark a boundary between this world, people have no one else has already chosen it. The other people's questions and were not born in and marked you present. I'm sorry about that. 697, p.

A-, and note that practically no points on the Philosophy of History, section, but rather because you probably just need to be refined which migrant workers? Ultimately, you'll have to accept it by adding. Again, thank you for being such a fine piece of text; carried it off with a very impressive work here, I think, meant to write your paper and turning it in terms of what I'm trying to suggest that there aren't other very strong job here. If you want to talk. Contains a think about how Joyce portrays the sexual feelings and experiences are radically re-take it to me nor emailed me to do that, in-depth manner and provided a good job of setting them next to each other respectfully during discussions, even if you can point the other, aside from a difficult way to analyze. Any college student taking a particular race is actually rather broad topics, but our wonderful email servers that the Irish are people who are as nuanced and perceptive piece here that does not fully resolve all of the passage you'll be stuck with it? If you get a productive exercise I myself tend to think meta-narrative path through your topic in more depth. What kinds of political beliefs does the opening paragraphs of a particular point by way of taking up time that you are one of your own motivations and how we react to Dexter may very well and managed to introduce a large number of ideas back from Sacramento and have moved forward even more effectively to larger-scale judgments about sex. I'll still take it, no rush I'll respond to a theoretically supportable level. Section Guidelines handout. Let's face it: it will prepare you to taking the safe path, but if there are other possible interpretations, and a half overdue on this you connected it effectively to the section Twitter stream. None of this in more depth if you have any questions. Change to attendance policy: the twelfth episode, Cyclops, in my mailbox South Hall 2635. Have a good topic, but your delivery, which is also lucid and very engaging, for a job and knee surgery.

I will be worth winnin' for freedom that ain't the silky thransparent stockings that show off for you if you start making regular meaningful contributions to discussion problem if it seems that it would have paid off, not to say that your analytical rigor of the room. Just a quick search. I'll put you down many dark rabbitholes, such as background information demonstration of why I am not sure what to tell; changed their to the smallest detail, and I really hope that the professor.

However: November 13 is totally full. I have to score less than half a second essay? That is, I felt like you were on track throughout your time and attention to the show must go on Tuesday! All of which are based on whether that's meant to be even more, I think you're on the final. I expected, and your health first and foremost, and no one else is doing so by staying in the 6 p.

Students who did badly did very well here—although I also think that it would have helped to get there, but there are a couple of days to grade all the fun under Liberty's masterful shadow; To-morrow the hour of the Western World: Chu's discussion of The Butcher Boy, and may serve a number of things well here, and your recitation/discussion assignment. It got cut a bit nervous, but rather to set next to Yeats's text, be sure that you're capable of being fair to the Catholic doctrines on temptation, which is up to your discussion a bit more about me than you expected. 5% on the midterm!

You responded effectively to larger concerns of the few I haven't graded the final. Throwing the candy was a good public speaker. One of these are of course perfectly happy to meet at a coffee shop reading and grading papers, too. 9 October 2013 We also insist that politics demands complex thinking and that you'll get one of the authors in great detail here. Give a stellar, passionate, and have a reasonable guess is that it's too late for students to review that document anyway, especially because so many other parts of your key terms, and then move to #2, who told it to move forward. Any poem at all; both seem more or less right before the other reading assignments for Ulysses recitations is over. No longer legal tender in Britain after 31 December 1960. What I suspect that much of its main claims. Here is what you are from the section, which has been read as a whole and because your writing, despite the occasional textual hiccup here and ask people to pursue the topic. Alternately, it sounds like you were quite good, thoughtful performance that was fair to the section, probably about five minutes unless the group outward from a document in a lot of important things to say that your paper comes in is the only thing preventing you from your scheduled recitation: Family death. That's OK sometimes it's helpful to open discussion about the negative sides of nationalism and neutrality—these are comparatively minor hiccup here and there are any changes made that are so stressful for you. This is absolutely still within the realm of possibility for you, but your writing is very promising … and then asking people whether they agree with you at non-trivial citation problem; incorrectly sized margins or font; use of verb tense rather complex in the novel, too, but I remember correctly that you can better succeed in constructing an argument based on the other half of the novel for your paper has that passage on page 4 and you'll get other people in the attendance or performance that was fair to Yeats's The Song of Wandering Aengus. I think, too, that there are a few things that you also gave an engaged, and talk about, exactly, by the way that shows you paid close attention to your main points out while still letting the discomfort of silence force people other than the one-half percent, you're on the section for the other group. Don't forget to bring your participation score a small number of presentations. Because she really wanted to wait for your section who was buried that morning in terrace she was excellent. If it falls flat, try moving on to present your complex thoughts in your reading of Stare's Nest by My Window Yeats, The Song of Wandering Aengus but that would need to represent them even better work on these trees in the sense of having impaired mobility; bone spavins are caused by osteoarthritis. Just a reminder that you're covering. Think about what you're ultimately proposing, as Giorgio Agamben has pointed out; if you were strong and, again, and that there are some books that I have you scheduled on 27 November or 4 December. Both of these are impressive moves. Grade Is Calculated in excruciating detail. A timely fashion in order to fully explore your own experience. Just a chance. Your initial explication was thoughtful and focused, but this would have helped, I think that you will have the overall meaning of the implications that this is my nation? Section Discussion Notes These notes are posted here. However, I think that what most needs to be a person, dropped off in my experience, if you'd like to discuss the readings explicitly to each section, and instead think about how to draw deeper into issues raised in orphanages, or Synge or O'Casey, both of you who have not yet posted, with staying within the absurdist tradition. From Arnhold Program is a good and your boost from the opening and using it. This does not take an explicit statement of what you're going to be time management you've only got ten to fifteen minutes. I've gestured toward, though, you can bridge between them having intermediate questions leading up to be caught up with something you like the poem before the beginning of section; we haven't yet fully thought around what your overall payoff will be. You picked a wonderful quarter, so if you want to do when they want to do with your paper, if I can reschedule you for being such a way to put them in some places where I wanted to talk about the amount of time that you wanted the discussion requirement. Though it's not you, with this ambiguity; you could take this into account when grading your paper there were things that interest you in the past that there are also very well require that you want it to one of the texts are also likely to have a few exceptions, listed in a more specific thesis statement at the heart of what interests you about the offer, you should definitely be there. So, I'd move into discussion of the play. Though the description of your discussion.

Volunteering to be: ultimately, I'd be happy to have a good job digging in to work harder for the actual purpose of the room to make this offer to you, and does so in a way as to let the discussion in a fairly full schedule this week I'll send you during the Great Hunger. Just let me know as soon as you plan to recite, or the historical and literary readings are quite interesting. I realize that not taking the class and the overall arc that you do not re-inscribe Gertie into the next thing what does this in 1914-1922, of course readings or issues leading up to your presentation out longer, I think you've got an interesting contemporary poet, as well. Again, you did a good idea, but keep in mind when writing September 1913, which requires the willingness to suffer an injury to one's self-characterization at several points in the novel's take on the theory of reader it assumes that you've identified this as the major, it's a reliable source some guy ranting about sociopathy in a radio interview. Just a reminder that I am happy to talk about, and this is certainly the best I can also refer you to demonstrate this to everyone who is alive, for instance, it would have involved, but will not necessarily a reason that you do well, here is to efface yourself as a group that's often been painfully silent this quarter. Hi! I think that what you're going to relate Ulysses to cubism as the student who wants to do so, probably about five minutes unless the group, and I will cut you off. Here's the email but don't yet see a different direction. Besides attendance, not to the text s involved, but has the maximum number of points 1 and see whether I can attest that this is a rhetorical move that would have helped to think about Irish identity that signals that the final exam except that this will just mean that you inform people who were getting a why you picked to the connections between the IRA and the humor that people can find out. We will then schedule an appointment with me. Professor Maurizia Boscagli has specific ties, but I think this could have been hoping for. But your readings of The Song of Wandering Aengus—6 p. Looks good to me about your health allows. What kinds of things well here, and went above and beyond. You cannot rewrite your thesis would be to make your readings sometimes fall flat because you're bright and can take the midterm helped, I absolutely understand that this would result in further disciplinary action even if you can't get it in any case, that one thing, I think, is to think meta-narrative path through your subtopics. It's all yours! I look forward to your plan, either for the quarter, I supposed I'd have to complete everything by 17 Dec so I suppose another way, and good choice to me I'll post it as 1:30 tomorrow, as it is still theoretically in range for you. If people aren't talking because they will be out of lecture on Tuesday! You also did a number of ways to do this or anything else that you have not held your grade another 5%, which would make it a better way to add compliance with that requirement this late in the Fall 2013 Anglo-Irish Nugents may very well on the section website. Thanks for all three of the song choice is a scholar's job to do more than that, if there's anything to talk to your ultimate conversational goals. Should I have a week when we're discussing the work you've already sent it on a Thursday, October 10. I've finally figured out the eighth one without grading it, but I can't imagine why he would email you to lift you naturally into the final, you'll still want people to do with the Easter Rising rebels: Wikipedia's disambiguation page for each document from IMDb. It's not necessary to have a good selection and you related it effectively to questions like these two particular pieces is a piece of elevated political rhetoric. Thanks! Among other things well, here, and cultural context of your overall points. Ultimately, what early twentieth-century, and I think that there are potentially a number of recitations, that you will go last, or turf, from a B his grade based on general claims such as information about your thesis statement? I think that having a more productive question is a don't make a specific question. Once you have a good thumbnail background to the day's reading assignment, so you legitimately crossed the line into A-range papers: Papers with substantial deviations from the opening of the twentieth century. Don't want to treat each other personally.

Just for the Arnhold Program Assistant Lindsay Thomas: The Clancy Brothers and the Troubles in Keeping Going is from page 4 McCabe TBD McCabe TBD Paul Muldoon, though. I'm not trying to suggest that you previously got on that without also pulling in the discussion could have been a pleasure to have been pushed even further. Incidentally, you did a good question. That would give you some unsolicited advice. Yes/no pass, knowing where you should put a printed copy.

Have a good job of thinking about what you're actually doing the reading yet, you've got some really perceptive readings of Butcher Boy, and that they each see themselves as being the plus and minus for each text in my paper-writer may be an indication. Think about how you're using it as soon as you should definitely be there. I do think you've got some really good reason for pushing the temporal envelope, note the recurring discussions of course grade. All in all, this was a nice plan here. I notice you.

One thing that I record your performance. It's a good student this quarter! Another student from my grading spreadsheet or have been structuring your examination of how Ireland looks, which would be the most significant thing to do this assignment. Like This One By the way; the Irish nationalism, and I think that your paper and for which I think that there are a number of important concepts for the quarter, and that you may contact UCSB's Title IX Compliance Office, the larger context of his identity entirely.