Tumgik
#he's got his own trauma right
misc-obeyme · 4 months
Note
Raven is known to be blunt and speak before he thinks. This has led to him getting into a few fights... Fun fact, jesters are the only people who could insult the king without execution and were paid the best.
So as a result he gets along with Diavolo the best, oddly enough. He asked diavolo about his childhood which led to diavolo asking about his in return. Which led to him trauma dumping, although inevitably. Which led to him being comforted.
He enjoyed being babied.
Bows for barb
Awww, bonding!
Well old school kings were basically tyrants so I guess it's no surprise that people insulting them get killed. Seems like a waste of resources though. I guess it depends on the execution method. Hmm.
Anyway, I suspect Diavolo is one of the best characters for childhood trauma sharing and subsequent comforting. I just think he'd get it, you know?
6 notes · View notes
bitchapalooza · 27 days
Text
So apparently I've accidentally given Sanji a feeding kink in the current fic I'm writing without realizing? Huh...
30 notes · View notes
moongothic · 11 months
Text
We all know how a lot of Luffy's opponents have been in some ways premonitions of the type of person Luffy could end up as if something went wrong in his life. For example Moria is what Luffy could've become had he truly lost his entire crew at Sabaody if Kuma had not saved them
And we know Crocodile is what Luffy maybe could've become had Luffy given up on his dreams and become jaded after losing to him. But like, when you think about it, that's not the only dark reflection of Luffy in Crocodile, is it
'Cause Crocodile, despite employing people for Baroque Works, did not trust anyone around him and did not considder anyone to be anything else but an employee to him. And we know he had been planning on taking over Alabasta for like 14 years (at the very least), BW being a thing for only the past four (pre-timeskip)
So like. Did Crocodile spend the last 14 years alone
Like yes he had his workers at the Casino and Robin etc, so he was like, around people, he wasn't like Brook who was in Total Isolation. But on an emotional level, has he not spent the last 14 years all by himself, completely detached from anyone, unable to trust or rely on anyone else?
That is sad as fucking shit, holy hell
'Cause then you compare him to like Luffy and like
Tumblr media
Our sweet baby boy was so afraid of being alone that Luffy literally went through hell just to gain Ace's approval despite Ace trying to signal to him he wasn't interested befriending him
And through out the whole series Luffy reiterates time and time again how he needs and wants his friends around because he literally can't live without them, both on a literal "he can't cook or navigate or have fun by himself" level but also on that emotional level
And Crocodile just. Spent 14 years of his life, if not longer, alone.
Sweet jesus what happened to this man
And that just makes me further wonder, what the absolute fuck were Crocodile's Rookie Pirate days like?? Like did he have a crew or was he just yolo'ing it by himself???
Like. Mihawk's never been on a crew as far as we know. Kuma was a Revolutionary, not a pirate, but he wasn't like alone still. Doflaming, Hancock, Jinbei and Moria however have/had crews of their own. So what was Crocodile's deal? Did he have a crew before? Was he a captain or was he on someone else's ship? (Although surely the Government wouldn't offer the position of a Shichibukai to a cabin boy or the first mate, right)
And if he did have a crew, the hell happened to them??
Like we know Crocodile got his ass kicked by Whitebeard, I just find it unlikely Whitebeard would've pulled a Kaidou on Crocodile's crew and slaughtered them, that's not a very Whitebeard-y thing do, right?? ...Unless Whitebeard was just different 20+ years ago and was willing to annihilate entire crews. We don't know. Or maybe Crocodile and his entire crew were like Turbo Rotten from the beginning and Whitebeard figured they deserved to get wiped out, much like how we saw Shanks wipe out Kid's crew at Elbaf. Or maybe Whitebeard saw no reason to have mercy on someone affiliated with the World Government.
That all said, if we wanted to assume Crocodile had somekind of trauma that lead to him viewing people not only as disposable but also untrustworthy, then maybe losing people dear to him like that wouldn't lead to that mindset. Like Moria witnessed his beloved crew die and that caused him to want to create a crew he couldn't die, so he wouldn't go through that emotional trauma again.
Which leaves me to wonder. If something caused him to lose his ability to (emotionally) trust people, and if Whitebeard broke his dreams... Maybe Crocodile had a crew. And maybe they abandoned him when he lost to Whitebeard. Figuring they didn't need a weak captain who was probably going to bleed to death anyways. Or maybe the crew tried to take his head (after Whitebeard kicked his ass), after all, he was already a Shichibukai, anybody who took Crocodile's head could maybe attempt to take that title for themselves if the Government allowed it, and if not, at least gain more fame for themselves.
Either of these scenarios would certainly result in you losing your ability to rely on others. And leave you willing to spend the rest of your life alone. Who would have in them to go through that again.
Or maybe he came out of the womb unable to trust people and he was just yolo'ing it by himself like Mihawk right from the begining, who knows
Regardless I'm just
Tumblr media
73 notes · View notes
allsassnoclass · 4 months
Note
HELL YEAH!!! can i get uhhhh #9, an I'm so proud of you kiss? pairing, fandom, etc is all up to you :) ill read it even if im not in the fandom go fkn crazy ily xoxo
hi @clumsyclifford!!! alrighty let's throw some fake college sports players in here.
jerejean: I'm so proud of you kiss
Jeremy goes to find Jean after a few minutes, weaving through the crowd of his teammates and the Foxes until he reaches the edge of their party's sphere, out in the sand where the light from the bonfire has no hope of reaching. He stumbles over Neil and Andrew, drawn hypnotically to the bright cherry of the cigarette they're sharing, but neither of them question where he's going or make any attempt at conversation. Neil simply tilts his head to the left with a knowing look, and Jeremy nods in thanks once he spots the shadowy figure sitting yards away in the darkness, looking out at the waves.
Jean doesn't look up as Jeremy approaches, chin resting on his knees as he looks distantly out at the ocean, where the horizon line blends too deep in the darkness to discern what is sea and what is sky anymore. Jeremy flops gracelessly down next to him, kicking up sand and checking to be sure Jean isn't shying away. He relaxes when he doesn't. Jean still doesn't do well with isolation, but he's an introvert at heart and needs his space. After the events of today, Jeremy isn't surprised that he retreated down the beach to be alone, but he also knows that it's the kind of alone that Jeremy is welcome to interrupt.
It makes his chest fill with warmth, being one of the people that Jean doesn't need energy to be around. It's a privilege that he doesn't take lightly, especially when so few people in Jean's life have been safe. For him to have found a group of people to love and be loved by in return is no small feat, and it's something that they've gradually cultivated together in the past year.
For a moment, Jeremy thinks about the first time he saw Jean in person outside of a court, watching the shell of a man cautiously approach him at LAX with only a few t-shirts, a tattoo, and years of abuse to his name. He would never have predicted that they'd be here now, only a few weeks shy of a year later. Jean has grown in ways too numerous to list, but Jeremy has changed, too. It's a mutual metamorphosis, made more important for the way that they've grown in harmony with each other, filling in each other's gaps while leaving room for the other person to stretch and flourish.
Of course, one other difference is that they're NCAA champions now. It isn't a new title for Jean, but Jeremy suspects that this one feels sweeter, more earned.
This is a win that Jean should feel proud of, one untainted by the shadow of black wings and bruises. A championship that has nothing to do with the number that used to be tattooed on his face and everything to do with the person he has decided to become.
"What are you thinking about?"
Jeremy tilts his head towards the quiet, lilting sound of Jean's words. His accent has lessened slightly over the year, either due to less necessity to use his French without Kevin around or being surrounded by people who never stop talking in loud California drawls, but it still colors his words like a swash of blue in a sunrise.
Jean never wants to return to France, but sometimes Jeremy wonders if he would enjoy visiting Canada or Haiti, somewhere that he could use a version of his native language without ghosts following him.
"Jeremy?"
Jeremy blinks, bringing himself back to the present rather than some unnamed future with the two of them wandering around Montreal.
"I was thinking about our win," he says when he can remember what Jean's original question was. Jean huffs, but the sound is fond. Jeremy can't see much in the darkness, but he can picture Jean's expression perfectly. He's not smiling, but he's softer, relaxed and open enough that Jeremy can read his intention.
"How does it feel to be a champion?" Jean asks.
"Amazing," Jeremy sighs, tipping his head back and remembering every hour of practice and hard-fought game that brought them here. Despite the backlash from his decision to cut down the line last year and all of the negative press surrounding Jean's transfer, they made it all the way to the championships and came out on top. It was a battle in more ways than one, but it was absolutely worth it for the look on Kevin Day's face when Cat stole the ball from him using a technique that Jean taught her, then slammed the ball down the court for Jeremy to catch and score.
The team as a whole has grown exponentially. Jeremy has never pushed himself harder, and it wasn't all sunshine and smiles on the court this year. Still, they held it together, and as turbulent throwing a former Raven into their midst was, Jeremy has never regretted the decision to bring Jean to them.
"It's sweeter because I could do it with you," Jeremy says.
He glances at Jean out of the corner of his eye. He doesn't duck his head bashfully, and he doesn't freeze awkwardly the way he used to when Jeremy would drop a sappy but sincere compliment months ago. He simply lets the sentiment wash over him, keeping his focus on Jeremy.
"I'm glad you are happy," he says. Jeremy reaches for his hand, fingertips dragging along his forearm and wrist until Jean turns to thread their fingers together.
"What about you?" Jeremy asks. "How does it feel to be a champion this time?"
Jean takes time to consider his answer. Jeremy listens to the distant sounds of their teammates and friends over by the fire and the gentle sounds of waves hitting the shore while he waits. A breeze gently shifts his hair, light and crisp enough that he nearly shivers.
"I didn't think it would mean this much to me," Jean says quietly. Jeremy squeezes his hand once, then relaxes, giving Jean the space he needs. "I knew that winning with the Trojans would feel different, but the Ravens won because we were expected to. You and I won because we deserved to this time. Because we fought harder and wanted it more."
"And you did it all without a red card, even though Neil was being annoying," Jeremy says.
"It felt good to beat him," Jean grins. "That was very satisfying."
No one felt like it would be a good idea to make Jean block Kevin, not with everything he's told them about scrimmages in the Nest. While he played with Neil at Evermore as well, it was never while Neil was playing striker, and Neil only features in a fraction of the traumatic memories that Jean has recounted. Jean has been doing great in his sessions with Betsy and has grown a lot in his recovery over the past year, but no one wanted to risk prompting a flashback during the championship game, when the eyes of the entire public and Ichirou Moriyama would be on him.
Jean seemed to enjoy playing against Neil, anyway. Jeremy still doesn't understand their relationship and probably never will, but it was one of Jean's best games. Neil ran him ragged, but both of them seemed satisfied with their individual performances, and Jeremy overheard Jean tell him to have a winning day while stealing the ball at one point.
It's taken a long time for Jean to be able to have fun on the court. Healing is slow and non-linear, Jeremy knows that better than most. The progress that is visible, though, is much more gratifying because of it.
Jeremy looks at Jean, tracing his outline in the blue shadows. He takes in the relaxed slope of his shoulders, the enticing tilt of his head, the self-satisfied smile that Jeremy can barely see gracing his lips in this light. He looks like he belongs on this beach, relishing in his win with dozens of people who love him only a few yards away, holding hands with someone who adores him.
It's amazing, what a difference one year can make. Jeremy's chest feels warm and full, ready to burst.
"Hey," he says, squeezing Jean's hand. Jean turns towards him with a questioning noise. Jeremy tugs on his t-shirt, coaxing him forward until he can lean up to press their lips together. Jean responds once he catches on to Jeremy's intention, relaxing against him and sliding his free hand around Jeremy's waist. Jeremy presses forward, trying to transfer as much of the feeling in his chest to Jean as he can. He curls his hand around Jean's shoulder, partially to draw him closer and partially for his own stability. Jean sighs against him, and Jeremy can't help but smile into the kiss.
When they part a few moments later, Jeremy watches the way that Jean's eyes take a moment to flutter open.
"What was that for?" Jean asks. Jeremy smiles and brushes his thumb against Jean's cheek, right over the small heart tattooed there.
"I'm really proud of you," he smiles. Jean ducks his head, leaning into Jeremy's palm. "You've come a long way."
Jean wraps his hand around Jeremy's, pressing it against his chest.
"I couldn't have done it without you, Jeremy."
Jeremy doesn't think he'll ever get used to the way his name sounds in Jean's mouth, his accent curving around it and voice soft as music.
"Still," Jeremy says. "I'm really proud of you, Jean-Yves."
Jean ducks his head again, but Jeremy can't have that. He reaches for Jean's jaw again. Jean knows him well enough to evade and kiss him instead, the perfect distraction. Jeremy is happy to let him get away with it, because that was his end goal anyway.
They stay on the beach together for a long time. When their friends eventually find them, Jeremy watches the way that Jean lights up as Cat tackles him in a hug and he playfully banters with Kevin, two things that would've been impossible a year ago. Jeremy keeps hold of his hand, both of them on top of the world with no plans on coming down.
14 notes · View notes
good-beanswrites · 8 months
Note
hi! may i request some mikoto + amane (platonic obvs) … anything? they are very dear to me 😭
Yes!!! Thank you so much for the request -- they really are such a good pair ;-; (The thing is, I had so many nice scenes in mind about how they parallel each other, but they wouldn't know or reveal that about each other so I kept restarting...) Anyway, here's something right after Mikoto's first trial/verdict!
Mikoto could pick up on someone’s bad mood from a mile away, though the skill was unnecessary when the other party very clearly and calmly informed him, “I’m in a bad mood.”
After refusing his offer, Amane turned back to a thick textbook she’d been taking notes on. Didn’t kids usually complain that school was already a prison? She must have wanted the full experience. He'd worked nonstop at his studies as well, but this was a new level. Amane often reminded him of his little sister, though she always took the extra step like this. His sister would have jumped at this opportunity to play a few rounds of their favorite card game.
“It’ll be fun!”
He flashed a smile, but it had no effect on her severe expression. “I know you’re just trying to comfort me about our verdicts. I refuse to be pitied.”
“Comfort and pity are two very different things. But anyway, it wasn’t either of those things.” He gave an easy shrug “To be honest, I’m just a little bored. It’s weird not having any work to do during the day.” 
Mikoto couldn’t remember the last time in his life he’d had so many hours to himself. A lot of the others were fun to play games with. A few of the sportier prisoners helped him stay active. He enjoyed smoking breaks with the other men. Still, he was left to his own devices for the majority of his time. It was maddening. He’d recently requested some more art supplies, having used up the last batch, but they had yet to come in. Now with the verdict announcement, he wasn’t sure they’d ever arrive.
“That is your own problem. I already have something to do.” Her eyes lingered on the cards for the briefest of moments before returning to the book. “I told you, I’m not in the mood for it.”
Regardless of her hostility, he took a seat beside her. He leaned his arms out on the table. “We don’t have to play the same game.” The last time they'd played as a big group, several prisoners pulling the tables together to fit everyone. Amane had kept very quiet, eyes darting around at the cards as she tried to keep up with the rules. Not many of the others noticed the frustration clear in her face. Mikoto wasn’t the type to let her win out of pity, though he had begun to mutter the rules and strategies to himself a bit more as the night went on… 
“Is there a game you liked to play at home?”
 “No. There was no time for games in the house.” 
“All work and no play… hah… I know what that’s like.” He slumped his cheek onto his arm, lazily shuffling the cards around. He felt bad for bothering the girl if she truly was upset. He thought it was the bad experience that made her reject him, he hadn’t realized there were also family issues attached. Usually he could read people well; maybe he was losing his touch. He seemed to be losing touch with a lot of things, these days.
He readied a game of solitaire. 
“Mikoto?” Amane kept her face turned away. “There was… one game.”
“Yeah?” Mikoto shuffled the cards back together. He slid them over to her. “You should teach me!” 
She didn’t touch them. “You probably already know it.”
“Nah, I only know a few games. I’m better with tarot cards, though those aren’t really the gaming type. Come on, what is it?”
She told him the name of the game, insisting it wouldn’t be worth playing. She kept her attention on the textbook, but her eyes weren’t reading any of it. 
“Ahh, I’ve heard of that one! We start with four cards, right?” He started dealing them out.
“No, five –” she pointed to the deck, urging him to add two more. 
“Right, right.” He laughed lightly. “And the goal is to get pairs, and put them in a pile, uhh, here.”
Amane shook her head. She shifted her body slightly towards him. “You must be thinking of a different game. There’s actually three piles for pairs. One here, one here, and when it’s your opponent’s turn…” 
Her eyes gleamed as she explained the rules. She pointed to various cards, telling him exact moves and point values. “And to win, you need to –” Her expression shifted. “You… you already knew all this.”
“Of course not!” He put on his most convincing smile. 
She deflated. “You’re not a very good liar.”
“Tch, tell that to the warden.”
His shoulders sagged along with her. If Amane could see right through him, why was the rest of Milgram still coming up with stories about what he did and didn’t do? “Well, I might already know the rules, but it’s been a long time since I’ve played. You can still give me a hand. Plus, if you really are in such a bad mood, it’ll be good to take a break from your studies. You should always take a break when things get too overwhelming, yeah?”
She gave him a withering stare.
“Eh? What’s that face for?”
“Alright, let’s play. You can go first.”
“I mean it, what was that look? Aw, come on…”
#milgram#mikoto kayano#amane momose#see - the thing is they both had crimes about 'protecting themself' but both would deny it was for that reason#they both seem to have some family trauma but would never admit it#theyre both used to putting on their best behavior and being 'good' for others but hardly realize that themselves#they are both in denial all the time !!!!!#so i tried to show them getting along for their own perceived reasons -- mikoto thinks he likes her because she reminds him of his sister#and amane thinks she likes him because hes being kind about their verdicts#and while both are right theyre Also drawn to each other because they are very similar at their core#and both have skills with reading people/picking up on cues making it tough to lie to one another#that forced honesty makes for a solid friendship haha!#i also remember a comment from yamanaka that amane would be the worst at card games because shed have trouble with the rules#she seems old enough to handle complex games but she probably never got to play a lot at home ;---; and mikoto probably learns a lot of#types of games (and tarot) so can connect with even more people#i thought long and hard on whether mikoto would let someone else win but he doesnt seem the type (plus amane would notice)#once again i know amane starts speaking in the plural but this comes a bit before that#yaay thank you so much for the request! this was really fun to do - i hope you enjoy!#ive thought a lot about amane and john but less on her and mikoto lol so this was nice :D#drabbles
24 notes · View notes
dimensionzero · 1 year
Text
anyway every spider-man in the multiverse is alone except for miles. can anybody hear me
#every spiderman starts out thinking theyre the only one#every spiderman learns the lesson that theyre only one person and they cant save everyone#every spiderman grits their teeth and keeps going in face of tragedy#every spiderman learns about the multiverse and when they realize there are other people like them#they pass on their own trauma in a cycle --- this happened to me and it had to happen so that this good thing could also happen#which means that this terrible thing has to happen to you too#thats their universal truth: they cant save everyone alone so they need to maximize their influence to save as many as they can#but miles? miles morales is the spiderman who got bit already knowing who spiderman was#miles is the spiderman who had six different spider-mentors help him come into his own#miles is the only spiderman whose introductory monologue ends with 'and im not the only one'#miles is the one who looks at all these people whove decided they Have to suffer alone and says#'ok but what if i helped you'#'what if instead of taking the good with the bad we still got the good but stopped the bad anyway'#'sure i can't save everyone alone but the whole goddamn point of the multiverse is that im not the only one'#and thats why miles is our hero#across the spiderverse#across the spiderverse spoilers#(tiny amendment actually: miles is actually not the only spider who knows hes not alone right from the beginning#atsv also introduces us to pavitr --- a member of the spider society whos even more of a rookie than miles is#and huh whaddya know: the kid who knew from the start that he wasnt alone is the one whose traumatic 'canon event' is stopped#in a joint effort between him and his friends#yeah that probably isn't foreshadowing or anything)
67 notes · View notes
minivirgo · 5 months
Text
my bf just told me that a couple of weeks ago while hanging out with his cousin, they were talking about philosophy and politics and my bf said he started getting into anarchism primarily because of me and my influence and his cousin was IN SHOCK and said "julie ???????? well NOW i need to have a conversation with her". i am insulted lol.
9 notes · View notes
Note
Re: the end of your Joever/renegade post, it’s almost like wondering at what point does the “rough patch” cease to be a rough patch and just how the person *is*. As in, this is just how they choose to exist or are most comfortable living as a person.
(Not villainizing him at all, it’s just alluding to what you and others said… at some point it stops being a single issue or issues to fix and starts revealing itself to just be fundamental differences in compatibility and outlook.)
Just got this and I know it was sent pre-TTPD tracklist, but yeah!! Like it makes so much sense to me that a relationship would take over a year to go from Renegade to YLM and then another year to reach breaking up for good. That honestly feels like the most normal progression in the world, and I’m sooo interested to hear how she describes this experience and gives voice to something that I think a lot of people have been through.
I’ve talked about it on here before but my current relationship is 6 years old, and Renegade literally sparked some very VERY serious conversations for us when it came out because it gave voice to things we were dealing with and we were able to address using the language she offered us in the song. That was a definite “rough patch.” We nearly broke up, and had a real epiphany about things that we both needed to change in order to continue, and the types of support we both needed in order to stay safe and healthy. I felt so seen by Renegade and then in midnights as well- labyrinth and The Great War come to mind - the decision to stick it out. When I heard about joever it hit me (and others, from what I’ve heard!) suuuuper hard because it was like wait. Whatever measures they took after Renegade and the Great War actually didn’t fix it; what does that mean for me!? I was soo shaken up because of how strongly I related to the struggle (as it was portrayed to us). But that gets to the point of this ask: the difference between a rough patch and something un-fixable. I’m certain this will come up on TTPD, and it’ll be a deep portal time travel exploration of how she came to that exact conclusion. I can’t wait.
8 notes · View notes
yutamayo · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
25 notes · View notes
microfeelings · 1 year
Text
I just had a rant (with myself) about the character of Mama Jones in 2003 and how she was reduced to "haha, she babies her son and is basically looking for a babysitter for him lol" and how much I HATED that! She lost her husband to a very violent attack (implied), Casey was involved in this (also implied but for the life of me I cant get the timeline straight), the store her husband had got burned. This woman should have heeps of trauma that she most likely buried deep because SHE HAD TO RAISE CASEY ON HER OWN (I guess its implied theres an uncle or auntie bc of cousin sid, but theres no mention of them so I can only imagined they fucked right off), and she got reduced to that?? Come on 2003 you can do better. I KNOW you can do better
(Extra info on the notes bc its mostly ranting and it wouldnt make sense on the main post)
18 notes · View notes
jynxlovesluck · 2 years
Text
Kim Dokja is autistic, in this essay I will-
27 notes · View notes
lohstandfound · 8 months
Text
i have not been able to stop thinking about my richjake angel x demon post and now i cant even figure out my own angel/demon lore
2 notes · View notes
corbinite · 11 months
Text
watched through steven universe future for the first time almost two weeks ago and I still feel kinda messed up about it
#mine#personal#su future spoilers in the tags below#I weirdly saw myself in a lot of what he was going through#don't fully know where that came from#the part where he runs away to jasper and Changed in particular kind of took me out of my body#I mean I can be kind of suggestible and prone to identity disturbance so there's very likely at least an element of that here#but still#there were just some notes there that hit in a weird and uncomfortable way#also the part where he was mad at his dad and all his dad could focus on was how that fit into his own projection of how things should go#and it just made him madder#I can understand why I reacted to that part at least#(my dad turned into the kind of person I can talk to about trauma AFTER the chance to actually process it right had already expired)#(and he tells me whenever it comes up that if I want to just yell at him I can do it I can just yell at him and he'll take it)#(and I already know that wouldn't help me)#(there's certain things that can't really be fixed and there's just nothing to do but move forward)#(especially cause so much of the source of the trauma is a distant memory by now)#(so even if the emotional scars are still there what would I even yell about when I barely remember the events any more)#anyway yeah I understand why steven got so pissed at greg about wanting him to rebel#also I think the arc where steven sought out jasper unearthed some of my self esteem issues re: my history of anger#there's a darkness inside of me sometimes I scare myself yada yada insert shadow hedgehog jpeg#but yeah when I say that arc took me out of my body I mean it KNOCKED me out and I'm still sort of re-sewing my soul back in place#discombobulated as all hell#did more talking in the tags than I expected here
4 notes · View notes
Note
for the character solidifying asks - 49 and 50 for the oc(s) of your choice !
hiiii oh my gosh is this the first time youve been in my ask box. i think so. i am so sorry it has taken me a literal month but here, i offer you my second favorite jedi dad and then a miserable wet rat of a seer character solidifying asks here
49. What about voice? Pitch? Strength? Tempo and rhythm of speech? Pronunciation? Accent? Hellir’-Amderak Edi Drovaddal // Hellir’ has a very smooth, soulful, I won’t say gentle but.. non-domineering voice. He is a Diplomat and must adjust his voice as needed for pretty much any situation but at rest he is quite soft-spoken, and pronounces his words pretty easily? He doesn’t speak so crisp when he’s not on the job. It’s between a mumble, and just on the tip of a smile. He’s VERY deliberate, no matter what the case may be. If he says it, he means it. And he has kept his native Balosar accent to him (which is like a typical Coruscanti Basic accent, just.. slightly to the left of the usual from what you hear on the surface but not quite found on any other level. A bit gruff, choppy at times, but never upset or accusatory or negative. It’s just a little to the left of it all.)
50. What are the prevailing facial expressions? Sour? Cheerful? Dominating? Jupso Onurimaa // He always looks like he’s suffering, because he usually is. It’s the slightly furrowed brow, a little frown to him, lips pressed tightly together, he’s got worry and remorse in his eyes more than anything else. He’s withdrawn even in expression, when anyone’s able to see it. He used to be very good at hiding this away from others but he’s slipped up majorly since resurrection, and if you see him with no veil…
3 notes · View notes
lemememeringue · 2 years
Text
I started the night rly angry but then I practiced my empathy skills and I just woke up from a? nice dream? about my parents?
#mine#dream journal#lem experiences cognitive behavioural torture#practicing empathy wasn't rly a conscious choice more so associative thinking caused it to just happen#I guess it started w an angry dream. I was screaming crying at mum abt shit that went down in base housing and how lucky she is to forget#in this dream we'd travelled up north to see dad for some reason so he was there defending mum#this didn't de-escalate anything bc they were BOTH at fault and have since BOTH had severe memory loss of the collective trauma#then ig I entered a state of semiconsciousness where to calm myself I focused on my beloved ocs who I dump all my problems on#focus was on nikola. who I gave trauma almost inadvertently bc at the time I was focused on his father. who I also was traumatizing.#nik was sent away to visit an amish penpal for what was supposed to be a summer break while his parents got their shit together#that summer turned into three years before he was reunited w his family and they just ... Don't Talk abt it now bc it was such a heavy time#the thing is... I didn't give nik anger. he (and I) fully understand why things went down the way they did and ... it's no one's Fault rly.#just a shitty time where everyone was dealt a shitty hand.#now the part abt empathy isn't rly abt nik. it's that the trauma I gave his parents that triggered the chain reaction was Also mine#so I got to explore not just my own experiences safely but also this new parental angle and the guilt and shame from the hard decisions#made to protect a child from your own horrors#and they didn't make The Best Choice but under duress it was Better. and no one intended for it to be anything more than a summer.#ig from there I slid right back into dreamstate. the same one from before and right where I'd left off. which is rare.#and forced to see the parallels.. I (like nik) just can't bring myself to rage over equally shitty cards. and#so I apologised for antagonizing and the dream went on#I don't rly know what happened. at the end it seemed like I was ?? moving in w dad for a few months ?? idk#all I know is that the tension was gone and we were able to move forward w new shitty cards
6 notes · View notes
dirt-str1der · 2 years
Text
Sagawa is unfuckable in my head but in my heart he and nishitani had something embarrassing going on
#Listen to my problems#actually i transsexualise characters in yakuza based on one simple rule: if majima wants to hit then its a 65% that the guy is trans (if he#DESPERATELY wants to hit then its a 100% chance the guy is trans) the percentage rule doesnt apply to girls because majima doesnt believe#in unattractive girls (and shes right)#i will never date an ugly girl. why ? because ugly girls dont exist#let me get to the heart of my post anyway . i was randomly assigning cooler genders to yaluza characters when i actually looked at my list#and was like ... this ... this is !!!! majimas fuckit list !!! and theres already two dead guys on it. too ass#ill make it clearer actually sagawa being majimas handler does act a bit possessive and intimate towards him but he holds zero desire in his#heart for the poor boy even if he had to handfeed him for a while and it was super sad but majima on the other hand absolutely cannot#control where his dick compass swings and starts lusting after the guy more than twice his age plus he just got ‘rescued’ by sagawa <- its#just a simple passing of the leash from shimano to sagawa though and majima Knows this logically that hes completely forgotten how to act li#ke a human being and this is really dumb and he really shouldnt but hes extremely susceptible to his wild imagination and nightmares combo w#here hes trapped in a maze of his own libidio and trauma and against his will sagawa gets his sex engine roaring even though he hates the gu#y and thinks he sucks and it Really doesnt help that sagawa knows and lets majima know hes politely pretending hes not getting hard#stop reading btw im going to start talking about my creature of the night au wh actully no im not actually yes i am#but since majima goes wolfmode every full moon and he though his memories are foggy he can still Remember. and sagawa fucking loves animals#and a wolf is no different he really has a soft spot for wolfjima and spoils him a bit and majima gets trained against his will and itswired#deep enough to bleed over into his subconscious even when hes human and can remember that he hates sagawa but its hard to actually... hurt#him especially since in this au majima fucking bit him and sagawa let it slide. like he nearly got his arm torn off and had to wear a cast#for months and he never once blamed majima for it (soft spot strikes again) despite everything and despite how awful he is majima kind of#realises that sagawa (in his own way) is acting with majimas ‘best interests’ in mind <- extremely subjective statement#the thing is that he really respects him for that and trusts him not to pull the trigger on him when he doesnt ‘deserve’ it
2 notes · View notes