#And that my history/situation didn’t make me inherently unloveable etc
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Re: the end of your Joever/renegade post, it’s almost like wondering at what point does the “rough patch” cease to be a rough patch and just how the person *is*. As in, this is just how they choose to exist or are most comfortable living as a person.
(Not villainizing him at all, it’s just alluding to what you and others said… at some point it stops being a single issue or issues to fix and starts revealing itself to just be fundamental differences in compatibility and outlook.)
Just got this and I know it was sent pre-TTPD tracklist, but yeah!! Like it makes so much sense to me that a relationship would take over a year to go from Renegade to YLM and then another year to reach breaking up for good. That honestly feels like the most normal progression in the world, and I’m sooo interested to hear how she describes this experience and gives voice to something that I think a lot of people have been through.
I’ve talked about it on here before but my current relationship is 6 years old, and Renegade literally sparked some very VERY serious conversations for us when it came out because it gave voice to things we were dealing with and we were able to address using the language she offered us in the song. That was a definite “rough patch.” We nearly broke up, and had a real epiphany about things that we both needed to change in order to continue, and the types of support we both needed in order to stay safe and healthy. I felt so seen by Renegade and then in midnights as well- labyrinth and The Great War come to mind - the decision to stick it out. When I heard about joever it hit me (and others, from what I’ve heard!) suuuuper hard because it was like wait. Whatever measures they took after Renegade and the Great War actually didn’t fix it; what does that mean for me!? I was soo shaken up because of how strongly I related to the struggle (as it was portrayed to us). But that gets to the point of this ask: the difference between a rough patch and something un-fixable. I’m certain this will come up on TTPD, and it’ll be a deep portal time travel exploration of how she came to that exact conclusion. I can’t wait.
#i also have thoughts about how would’ve could’ve should’ve fits into all this: our rough patch was directly related to my PTSD#Which got significantly worse in 2021 and my partner was having secondary ptsd from watching me have WCS style freak outs#And feeling powerless about it#So would’ve could’ve should’ve feels very related to the processing of wether the relationship is in a rough patch#and dear reader#It’s hard to tell what is Real when you’re Falling Apart. Hence the whole concept of midnights! Exploring the past to understand the presen#And I think Joe likely was happy to attribute all of their problems to Taylor (this was my experience with an ex)-#He coasted on my self hatred and didn’t really object when I had anti hero moments#So then when the same stuff started to come up with my current partner and he showed up and took responsibility for his own stuff…#That really clarified that it was a rough patch that was possible to work through with the right person#And that my history/situation didn’t make me inherently unloveable etc#It’s just so poetic that midnights (an album about choices) led to the choice to end her relationship#And something about autonomy there too#C#would’ve could’ve should’ve hours#Ptsd#trauma#joever
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