#he's gonna brush me off
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#i just need to vent for like 5 mins#Its been annoying today that i feel like im cleaning up my bf's messes and doing his chores for him and i dont even get a thank you#he spilled a pitcher of water on the rug in our bedroom and left it for me to clean up when i got home on my lunch break#spit his gum in the toilet for some reason????? and i had to fish that out cause thats going to get stuck in there#and then asked me to do our laundry at my old house (dryer isnt working at new house yet) bec he needs clothes for work tomorrow#but he just expected me to do this for him and didnt even offer to go with me to do it himself#am I losing it or do i have a right to be miffed#it was his day off today and all he did was go to the DMV to change his address on his license (an appt i set up for him)#and go to his friend's house to hang out and drop off a lasagna i made for him cause his friend's been having a rough time lately#and now hes sleeping#im just feeling taken advantage of i guess#im scared if i talk to him#he's gonna brush me off
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text transcription:
Many springs ago, I perceived a sea of flowers upon a lake. I thought to myself that those fleeting colors held indescribable beauty.
The next time I perceived those colors was many years later, when the medic’s tent had blinded me to all but red. The radiance of that shining star was lost on my eyes.
Now, my eyes no longer perceive the subtleties in the colors around me.
But I am content.
For I can now see the most brilliant colors in my universe.
anyways yeah why did they fucking do that to jiaoqiu bro
the planning for this experimentalish comic is under keep reading


#artwork#digital art#hsr fanart#art#hsr#honkai star rail#jiaoqiu#hsr jiaoqiu#moze#hsr moze#feixiao#hsr feixiao#moqiu#feiqiu#moze x jiaoqiu#feixiao x jiaoqiu#it can go either way tbh depending on how you read it but i personally don’t ship feiqiu#this was mostly just jiaoqiu character exploration#hsr 2.5#hsr spoilers#just in case because i actually got fucking spoiled on the plot twist and it made me so mad#experimental comic#being in art school for like 3 weeks really experimentalpilled me#(i just wanted to do something other than lineart lmao)#painted it almost entirely with a singular noise brush because i was going for those memories vibes + jiaoqiu’s blind now#so i was trying to give the impression that he can’t see clearly#for anyone who’s about to like idk get on my ass about depicting blindness wrong#i based all of these visuals off of what i see when i take off my glasses#ill do more research when i wanna get in depth with this concept but for now my -300 degrees eyes are gonna have to be the reference#im imagining jiaoqiu with prescription bottlebottom glasses now
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"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.." MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi the suckening#arthur bennett#HEY SO THE REALLY FUNNY THING THAT THE CHARACTER DID THAT SEEMED RLY SILLY N GOOFY IN THE MOMENT?#LIKE THE WHIPLASH BETWEEN SERIOUS N SILLY ALMOST PISSED YOU OFF? WHAT IF I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE YOU SAD ABOUT IT#this was meant to be a scribble that would be a bigger part of a bigger page.might leave it on that page.#but still. bc o that i nearly posted it onto my wacky side blog.BUT NAYY I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME N ENERGY N YOU GOTTA SEE IT#ARTHUR BENNETT DRIVES ME CRAZY. I FEEL LIKE ITS ODD FOR HIM TO BE SO TECHNOLOGICALLY OUT OF TOUCH#WHERE HAS HE BEEN. HAS HE BEEN IN WAR? IS THAT WHERE MAGNUS CAME FROM? WHERE WAS HE WHEN HE WAS WITH EDWARDS CREW?#ARTHURRR I HAVE QUESTIONS ARTTHUUURR!! HEY CAN I ALSO ASK; WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU BECOME#DO YOU THINK HE HAD ANY IDEA HE WOULD VEER CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE MONSTER HE DESPISES. ALL BC HE DESERVES IT. OR WATEVER#HE FASCINATES ME SO MUCH. TO LOOK AT THE STONE COLD STOIC FOOL FROM THE START OF THE SHOW#AND TO FIND OUT THAT HE USED TO BE A BAD BOY.. A DELINQUENT... A LIL PRANKSTER.... MY GODDD THATS ADORABLE#I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW MORE.... BUT I DOUBT THE LAST EPISODE IS GONNA ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS..i love arthur bennett so much....#AS FOR THE ART!! i mostly used the fire alpaca watercolor brush. tbh im not a brush guy. anti aliased default pen tends to be my main game#but LATELY IM SQQQUIRMIN OUT OF AN ARTBLOCK so expirimenting like this is helping#DONT LOOK TOO HARD AT IT!! im still proud tho. colors are fun :3 im also very proud of the backgrounds#I LOVE THE CARTOON THING where the background looks all fancy n painted but the characters are solid colors#what else can i ramble abt. OH YEAH. i looked up the bikes to make sure they were time accurate tehehehe. 1913 to 2012.#almost a century apart!! isnt that neat? ALSO FUUUCK CAN I JUST MAKE A QUICK CONFESSION. DOWN HERE IN MY TAGS.#only the strongest can read my tags anwyay. SO I REALIZED WHY I LOVE ARTHUR SO MUCH. TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE#while arthur is a Stoic and Cool vampire w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORs#THERE HAPPENS TO BE A ROBOT FROM A BAND W A TITANIUM ALLOY SPINAL COLLUMN#WHOS A Stoic and Cool ROBOT w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORS#the fuckkkiiinnngggnn The Spine from steam powered giraffe. WHATEVER. i cant escape from my heart. i guess.#i think The Spine and Arthur could be friends. Arthur saw the band perform back when they were the Steam Man Band#EDIT: WOOPS I DIDNT REALIZE THIS WOULD END UP IN THE SPG TAG. HI GUYS DIDNT KNOW U WERE STILL ALIVE SORREE 4 THE CROSS CONTAMINATION
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hongjoong’s vlog is so boyfriend coded, and he did that intentionally. this man knows our delulu asses love this type of content from him, cuz he’s aware of how down bad we are :))
#i had to take a couple of hours after watching this to process#cuz this was A LOT#the morning bare face beauty 😩😩😩#whyyyy does he have to look so fuckable when he’s JUST BRUSHING HIS TEETH#the one button the arms out the forehead the bare face#UHHHHHHFGGGGHH#I’d give this pussy to him every. fucking. morning.#ok and then him showing the shot of him getting ready in just the tank top#OUCH#THAT WAS PERSONAL#the ARMS#FUCK ME SIDEWAYS#*inahle* HIM DRIVING !!!!!!!!!!#the ultimate boyfriend content#he looks HOT behind the wheel#the road head I’d give this man🥴🥴🥴#…..him in the gym#him leaning back just reclined looking all ridable#wanna straddle him and ride his shit SO BAD😩😩😩#he made sure to show off his arm too🙃🙃🙃#THE STUDIO CONTENT I AM LIVING#the cap while he’s driving at night🫠🫠🫠#so hongjoong when you gonna propose like#I’m ready 🤨💍#hongjoong hard thoughts#ateez hard thoughts#joongie#☕️
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Fernando instinctively trying to protect his boyfriend Seb from the champagne spray
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#im suddenly very brainrotted abt them again....#i mean rbh when am i not! just suddenly posting again#this has been in my gallery for a while but finally posted it#only HE can spray champagne on his rival okay 🙄🙄🙄#possessive much??#me when i read into things too much 🙉#I DONT CARE!! ITS SO CUTE TO ME#its not even like him preemptively trying to avoid getting sprayed#like no its very much him trying to help seb block the spray imo#i feel like you can almost see him say 'stop' but maybe thats a bit too delusional shfjkg#i wish i could post a vettonso clip every day 😔#grrrrrrrrr i wonder if their fingers brushed in the last pic.......#theres smth so cute to me abt fernando up on the podium#kinda waiting to pour it on seb#and then seb going up there to dutifully receive his champagne shower#f1#formula 1#sebastian vettel#fernando alonso#vettonso#we do a little bit of f1#2013 canadian gp#i meant to gif a race tonight and i didn't so posting this instead!#* i just realized you can see seb reach for his hat and then abort when lewis sprays him#i bet he was gonna take it off and let fernando pour it on his hair and then prob shake like a dog like he usually does....#i feel like ive been edged now 😔😔😔😔
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I have discovered Ambessa Medarda for the first time
Here's a silly video I made
#shitpost#ambessa medarda#arcane#arcane ambessa#i also put a bunch of images from pinterest in the chat#guys bad news i think im gay#how was i supposed to stay heterosexual after she appeared on screen though#like if i wasnt a lesbian before i certainly am now#shes so hot though#im not super in the arcane fandom i really hope nothing bad happens to my new favourite minor deity#im on her appearance episode#IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME NOT HIM IT'S NOT FAIR#she could fondle MY face :((( ive got a soft round ready-to-be-fondled by big rough hands face :((#my hair is fluffier and prettier than his :(( sure im not blonde but everything is negotiable#ive even got a fringe that could be brushed out of my face when it's sticky with sweat and blood after a losing battle :((#i have a face made to go flat and dull when I tragically die after the somebody-or-other failed to do this or that#seriously ive got huge “”am i gonna make it?“ as ive lost three litres of blood” energy yk#like im a flashback death that motivates an important character to keep going or whatever#if that guy dies in a way i described it will be so fucking funny#i hope he dies and gets his filthy eyes off my wife#how many fictional women have i called my wife?? probably a lot#local cuisine#local cuisine arcane#ambessa's twink#hydrated viktor#found out his many bitch named#alsoo he's not blonde i just paused at a bad time and took a photo of a screen#which meaaans my hair is EVEN MORE NICER than his
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I know I design him with the intention that he becomes an evasion tank, but there's an irony I find very amusing in making his new magitek armor lighter than his original.
#ffxiv#sketch#concept#zenos yae galvus#adventurer zenos#I'm probably gonna mess with the design more involving his grieves and the belt design#but I'm at least happy with the mask and the marble aesthetic for the upper half of his helm#even if it reminds me heavily of sentai helmets#superhero landing lookin ass#what is not shown is tsu having to heavily bribe nero for the auto-equip tech that he has#aggressively even#...wait that actually does just make him a power ranger#WHOOPS#anyways I also just like the idea of- after a while- him and estinien just keep getting tackled or chased by kids that think theyre cool#and zenos in particular trying hard to shoe them off for a variety of reasons lol#I just get the mental image of him picking up any one of them that approach him- turning them around trying to get them to just walk off#or him “begrudgingly” nudging a ball back and forth acting like hes just trying to move it away from him#I also drew the bottom right with the thought of him not being used to short hair- and he's just stuck having to constantly brush it back#takes the helmet off and it all just fluffs up- and you just hear a sigh through his mask LOL#and then with the cloth- he can turn it into weapons he's used before in case of emergency or utility- like a scythe or the katanas#mostly because as I write adventurer zenos- unless it requires stabbing or slashing he's usually just going to be up front brawling it#look you gotta understand- the final fight lives in my head rent free and I adore the concept of brawler/pugilist zenos
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ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to turn everything into a transgender allegory
#💥.txt#ME WHHEN. ME WHEN#I'M NOT GONNA TEACH YOUR BOYFRIEND HOW TO DANCE WITH YOU BY BLACK KIDS GOES. WHEN REGGIE YUNGBLOOD SINGS#'YOU ARE THE GIRLL THAT I'VE BEEN DREAMING OF (EVER SINCE I WAS A LITTLE GIRL)' AND THE SINGER IS MALE AANND ANDN A NDN#AND HIS VOICE IS LITERALLY ACHIINGN WHEN HE SINGS IT. AND. AND.#NAND IN AN INTERVIEW HE BRUSHED IT OFF AND SAID IT WAS JUST AN INSIDE JOKE BETWEEN HIM AND HIS SISTER. AND.#WHEN WHENEN WH HEENW WHEN WHEN#(STARING HUGE EYED IN FRONT OF RED STRING CORKBOARD .) HI . UM.#ANYWAYS!!!!!! HI hey!! :D :)) hi :) (INSANE)#gehahah. anyways hi :) big fan of that song#I've been Told the glee cover got popular on tiktok as reported from TikTok User Friends...... which is whatever but they kept the lyric.#they kept the lyric. Thanks. backflips. anyways insane sorry
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Day 1
Let’s rid of the evils first and save the merrier ones for the end.
Who is worse?
Azriel: Confessed his love to a woman beaten and battered, and abandoned in enemy lands by her father
Cassian: Slept with a woman his brother loved in order to hurt the said brother
You may recruit your tribe in your crusade if it pleases you. Your contenders: @litnerdwrites @fenrysmoonbeamswife @gwandas @positivelyruined @hrizantemy
[I commend your courage for claiming to know my identity. However, I assure you, my beloved liege, you know naught of it.]
I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THIS
Okay the obvious answer is Cassian but not for the reason you listed. I actually do not consider Cassian sleeping with Mor as a reason on the list of why he sucks.
Here are my personal favourites of why he sucks. Keep in mind, this is not all of them, just the highlights.
Emotionally abusing Nesta by constantly bringing up her trauma and using it as leverage to get her to act how he wants.
Restricting Nesta's intake of food when she was already struggling with eating.
Physically abusing Nesta as punishment via taking her on the hike from hell, and making her climb a mountain until she passed out from dehydration.
Knowing Nesta had been through SA but still cornering her while asking her sexually intruding questions (this ones from the bonus chapter I believe)
Taking advantage of Nesta sexually, by sleeping with her when he knew and had shamed her for using sex as an unhealthy coping mechanism.
I could keep going on and on, but those are just the few highlights.
Anyway, obviously I'm picking Cassian as the worst here BUT BEAWARE I AM DOING SO BEGRUDGINGLY.
When I tell you, I fuckin hated Azriel the moment he stepped onto page in the ACOTAR series, I mean I almost DNFed because I hated him so much.
Not for any particular reason (in the very beginning at least) he just pissed me right off.
But again, the example provided is hardly a reason as to why someone wouldn't like Azriel, so let's run through the highlights, shall we?
Azriel's abuse towards Nesta is quiet, but that doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
He was in active participate in punishing Nesta in the hike from hell by purposefully packing her bag to be as heavy as possible.
When he saw Nesta's bruises from falling down the stairs, he assumed they were from Cassian pushing her and he was amused by the thought.
He was a bystander as Cassian controlled Nesta down to her eating habits.
He also regifted something made for a woman he sexually fantasized about and tried to fuck, to an SA survivor. Which is *creepy* and *weird*
He's also just overall... really fucking annoying? He can't do his job properly, he can't hold his composure (See: The High Lord's Meeting), he really on exists as pretty decoration, and that's when he's not being the biggest asshole ever.
So, once more I am choosing Cassian as the worst, BUT ONLY BECAUSE HE IS WORSE THAN AZRIEL, NOT BECAUSE AZRIEL IS GOOD AT ALL
#anti cassian#anti azriel#acotar rant#you were right anon this is going to make me lose a bit more of my sanity#still gonna try and guess your identity tho because i think its fun#people always love to brush over azriel and the shitty things he does and it pisses me right off
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incoming: another fucking voltron rant because i watched a langst edit and now i wanna cry😭😭
they did not take time. they did not slow that show down for a little bit. especially for lance. cause he did not getting a fucking moment to find himself again after he FUCKING DIED. we saw him homesick, we saw him missing his family, we saw him insecure about his position on the team, we saw him insecure about himself, but we never actually saw him go anywhere else but being sad. he really did get barely any character development.
and tbh i feel like in a way just all the characters didnt have a moment to slow down. and i know, i know, its a kids show, its about fucking robots for fucks sake, theyre in the middle of a war. which, yeah. youre right. but there couldve been so much more, for him, for all of them. what about them? as people, with feelings. where are there emotions. why is it only sadness and happiness and not the enitre confusing spectrum of emotion between. does pidge not feel lost after she finds her brother? yeah, hes back, but i bet she didnt imagine she would be fighting an intergalactic war, and now matt is too. she imagined family dinner, brother barging into her room, dad making corny jokes, house happier and full of life.
hunks family was put in a fucking work camp. he had seen this across the galaxy, zarkons army imprisoning people, making them work, killing them. did he imagine that for earth ? did he imagine that for his family? how the fuck did he cope fighting a war, anxious as he is? how did he cope at all?
shiro isnt even in his fucking original body. thats fucking weird. im not saying that in a rude way bc like yeah, organ transplants are a thing irl, and a major life saving thing they are ! but like, how odd it must be to have someone elses kidney or heart in your body. nevermind to have your entire soul and conciousness put into another body, you but not really you.
keiths life,,, dude probably just doesnt even give anything a second fucking thought anymore. but like, could they not have shown him showing some more emotion. fair enough if he doesnt always cry in the moment but rather late on, but you'd think seeing allura die, they wouldve at least put some tears in his eyes. he had fucking no one before he had voltron. only shiro, and even then he was alone for so long when shiro had been on his mission. you cant tell me he didnt want to think of voltron as his family. they bonded :(
and lance, gosh lance. i feel like, if we looks at this as it is, lance would be the character that people think back on and go "oh yeah, he helped me accept my emotions, he helped me become the best version of me and gain confidence in who i am". in the fandom hes seen as someone with big emotions that he wears on his sleeve, but also someone who will put everyone else and their needs before himself.
he's a story of self-sacrifice, quite literally. he's the story of sincere love, of casual admiration. he's the story of the most wonderful friend, of loyalty, of no, I'll step down because there's a cause bigger than me, and im not the one for the job when there's people like my friends and you on the team.
and no one wanted to explore that? no one wanted to see him do more than just, what? flirt and literally die and fall in love and barely find his place on team voltron? that was it for him. it shouldn't have been, but it was.
#just... im no professional qriter but like#there couldve been more humanity to it yknow#to all of their emotions but most importantly lance who was brushed off time and time again#he was destined for greatness#hes so much more than what he shows people but the people just cant be bothered to look past the mask#:(#vld lance#lance mcclain#voltron#vld#mullettaegi#long post#i may be talking no sense but yall will be seeing it cause i cant be keeping this shit in my brain itll eat me up#i care about this show far too much and am not gonna hide anymore it means so much to me :(#and theres so so much more that im forgetting bc its been a while since i watched the show#so alls i can say is lance deserved better he deserved more he couldve been such a character!!#but ik there is so much more to it and i have more to say about his death but i just dont have the words
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sometimes you find yourself seething over small slights so intensely. ive started praying my twitter mutual actually dies
#len speaks#begging me to have sex with him weeks ago its like ok fine. he was drunk its whatever its fine.#but then standing me up after months of planning to hangout#and months of me helping him plan his trip to melbourne#suddenly youre 'too busy' and just completely blanking me#even though we had had the date and time secured months ago#he wasnt even doing anything special he was just fucking getting coffee with his friends#and then later posts a pic of him going to the same place i was gonna take him to but with his friends. oh my fucking god#suddenly the second i say im not free to go out to bars with him he gets weird. ohhhh right ok yeah yep i see it.#cant make up your mind if you want me for my body or think im an annoying pest that wont leave you alone god you fucking bastard#like this is an online friend. this is the only time in the forseeable future that we wouldve been in the same city to hang out#and he still brushes me off like that#stupid needy scumbag i hate you so fucking much#rude and nasty and mean and i hope he fucking dies
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STURGEON SUNDAY. BITCH!!!!!!!!!
1/28/24, ITS STURGEON
#diary#really though been doing alright mostly#need to figure out how im gonna get lab orders and blood test before end of january (not happening)#but have been brushing teeth consistently#which makes me feel like superman#vinny doing very well and both him an lubic are very very good pals#he is also getting bold about other peoples food however. i was habing my dinner last night and when he saw it he started purring#and i had to fight him off gently
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Listen, i don’t think Clark is Kons dad nor do I want him to be but I’m still delighted every time he acts paternally towards him
#this is because Clark is so overwhelmingly dad shaped by the way#there’s no set term for what Clark and Kon are to each other#Kon’s run would have been way funnier if every once in a while Clark flew down to Hawaii#to remind Kon to brush his teeth or some shit#it would also have been bad just so we’re clear#every once in a while the spirit of paternal instincts would overwhelm Clark and he’s black out#Kon would just be an innocent bystander#mine#I want Clark to have even more children#give him Chris back and that supergirl I know nothing about#and in fact let’s bring the other two supergirls I do know back also#Clark is definitely not a parent to all of them but by god is he gonna try#not me going off in the tags#clark kent#conner kent
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guess who has
~*~*~c o v i d~*~*~
#they'll be sending me home soon#they're gonna give me another one-dose for my cough#i guess it works for 72 hours??#and i can take the usual painkillers & quils on top of these things#thankfully! dude is v confident - after getting a look at the x-ray - that i do not have bronchitis or pneumonia!#for once!!!!#he's going to take a closer look later but he's SO sure he said i can go home and IF he spots something he'll call me#which like.. good luck lmao#but i've had this guy before and he actually does his job and he does it well. he doesnt brush me off like a#lot of hospital staff seem to (hi. it's me. the big fucking joke. back at it again at the krispy kreme)#(except the krispy kreme is the urgent care / emergency room and i also don't want me to be here)#anyway#cannot wait to get home#i'm not gonna be able to sleep right away - The Rituals will make sure of that - but at least i'll be home#maison speaks
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No seroquel means no sleep for me I guess. I've been trying for hours
#decided if im gonna be awake i may as well do something other than wallow in thoughts that cause me anxiety#just super fucked up that i went from believing i could no longer feel romantic attraction#to suddenly being flooded with feelings#and like he didn't even confess romantic feelings for me he just said hed be down to fuck sometime#usually id just be like yeah that's fine i don't usually catch feelings#so it's fucking me up that im having romantic feelings towards someone who probably doesnt feel that way#and it's fucking me up that i caught feelings from being TOLD he'd like to fuck we haven't even done that#sigh i can't pretend like those feelings weren't already there and just extremely repressed....#kept having so many dreams about being in love w him... I'd do everything i could to shake the feeling off#it comes down to insecurities#feeling like i make too many mistakes to be with someone as good as him#the fear that I'll stress him out#one of the most amazing people I've ever met. he has respected my boundaries for years#and i guess those boundaries were only firmly in place bc i knew deep down it would spark something#honestly i felt a huge spark hours before he even told me#whenever he came up behind me and hugged me on the neck#his lips accidentally brushed against my neck and i swooned#we haven't talked since that night but he said he wants to have a conversation about it when he's not busy#he has two jobs#his 2nd one lasting til 1am#but yeah thinking about what he might say is making me nervous#like what if he suddenly decides that it IS too risky#i don't think ill be able to kick these feelings#at least i let him know head on that i might fall in love w him if we pursue anything else#but we haven't even pursued shit!! and i feel this way already!!#i guess not ''in love'' but the crush is hard-fucking-core#the kind of crush i havent had since meeting my ex 7 years ago...#i forgot what the feeling was like. and it's.... so strong#.bdo
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[full of turkey and deviled eggs, half asleep] I don't think this story is sad enough actually I think I have to make it worse
#my mom complained abt the ql ending again so i went off on a tangent on how good a reunion hug between al and sam would be#so now im “hm i touched on it a little in chapter 2 that his presence was comforting even if he couldnt touch but. make it Worse#just keep making these boys upset actually“#cause when ur brain is filled with mourning for someone you want to hug your bestie but. what if the one person you most want to hug#cant. they can be there#they can be there and talk to you and hold your gaze and tell you a joke but they cant touch you#not even long distance the normal way. long distance in a way that a plane ticket cant fix#of course there are the homosexual undertones yes yes but the core denial of closeness is what im getting at#imo from how we see boy interact#sam is a physical person. he likes just gently touching his friends#he may not be like a giant hugger specifically but in the gentle baps on the head to just shoulder brushes and close talking#hes a physical person so the denial of that with his closest bud must be agony over time#anyway yeah im gonna make it sadder!!! its my mental illness i get to pick the sadness!!! whos gonna stop me!!!#and i will be writing him happy at the 4077th. as recompense.#and writing big bj and hawk and trapper and co holiday family happy time. it is good.#.yappin
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