#he's a vampire and a total asshole i legally have to love him

[shel-bits]

I am contractually obligated to like him

[asirensrage]

there's a heaven above you (don't you cry) - Part 3

Rating: M Pairing: Lost Boys/OC Fandom: The Lost Boys Warnings: swearing, vampires, violence, blood, sex, power plays, murder and attempted murder, probably more to be added Summary: The thing no one ever tells you about time travel is that you don’t have any control over where you end up or when you leave. It just happens. It also hurts like a bitch. Notes: I don't know what I was thinking but there is way more sex so far than I planned lol. Or at least there is before chapter 10. I love writing this OC though. This will be a poly pairing, so if you’re not into that, don’t read. previous/masterlist also on ao3

Part Three: Cherry Bomb

She dreamt of blond hair and laughter that echoed around her. She snapped back at it but all it did was make the voices laugh more. Endlessly amused at her frustration. Needless to say, she did not sleep well. Again.

Darcy opened the store in a worse mood than yesterday. This whole lack of sleep thing was not working for her. Thank god she picked up a pack of smokes. She couldn’t bring herself to smoke inside the store though, even if it was legal. God, she’d never get the smell out of her clothes if she did that.

She fell into the motions of opening the store, which included pulling up the blinds and checking the donation bin which looked like it had been broken into. They’d need to get the lock fixed. It wasn’t uncommon that people decided to steal what they could. This place was filled with lost souls looking for somewhere to belong, but that didn’t mean Darcy had to accept it. It hadn’t even been a week since the last break-in. They were just lucky she hadn’t caught them in the act yet.

For all that she had lost, Darcy liked working in the thrift store. It was an easy job and Sampson paid decently for the time. She wasn’t entirely sure how he made his money since some days passed and no one bought anything, but she wouldn’t complain. If it was a front, she couldn’t be held as an accessory if she knew nothing. The only odd thing was how no one had been working here already. Though, with the rate that missing posters got plastered to the bulletin boards around the town, maybe she just had good timing.

---

Clark showed up again when the sun was high in the sky and she had already given directions to two different sets of tourists. She didn’t know why they needed them. The town wasn’t that big and the Boardwalk was pretty straightforward. She figured out where everything was within a day.

“You look like shit,” he said.

“Language,” she admonished without any real bite. She leaned forward to look at him. Her hair was held back in a couple of simple victory rolls but mainly left loose. The last thing she needed to do was give herself a headache on top of the lack of sleep. She needed coffee. “If I give you five bucks, can you grab me a coffee and bring it? You can keep the change.”

He looked at her. “How do you know I won’t just take the money and run?”

“And miss the pleasure of my company?” she asked. “You do that and you won’t be allowed back in.”

He stuck out his tongue at her. “Alright, alright. I’ll do it.”

“Good. Add a bit of sugar in it, but that’s it. I don’t like milk.” She opened the cash register and pulled out a five-dollar bill. She’d replace it with her own once she felt more human again and actually had the desire to move.

Clark took it and disappeared. Thankfully, he was only gone for about ten minutes before he returned with the nectar of the gods. She winced slightly as it burnt at the first sip.

“So what happened to you?” Clark asked. He was browsing through one of the racks as he left her to wake up.

“What do you mean?”

“You look like you got totally wasted.”

“I feel like I did,” she said, “only without actually doing so. I didn’t sleep well.” She paused for a moment. Clark had been here longer than she has from what she could tell. “You know the gangs here, right?”

He turned to her and scrunched up his face. “The Surf Nazis?”

“Ugh, no, the other assholes. The bikers.”

It took him a moment before he answered. “The Lost Boys?”

She snorted. She was right that it had something to do with Peter Pan. So which one wore the tights? The image of Paul in his tight pants the other night sprung to mind and she tried not to laugh. That answered that question.

“Why you asking?”

“I met them with Frankie the other day.” She took another sip of her coffee. God, she wanted a cigarette. She held back on the desire though.

“Yeah? You like them?”

“Don’t know them. Just wanted to know what you think.”

“They’re assholes,” he said instantly. It made her grin. “They ride into the crowds all the time. I don’t go near them, but girls love them. They always find their way to some party.”

“Good to know,” she said. That didn’t really explain anything about them. Perhaps that was one of the things about gangs. The only ones who really know about them were those in the gang itself. Hopefully, they’d lose interest soon so she could go back to minding her own business.

Clark left without another word. She turned back to her coffee and tried to wake up. For the first time since Sampson told her, she was grateful he was hiring someone. Then at least she could sleep in.

---

Night was never a quiet thing in Santa Carla.

The Boardwalk filled with people, like ants on food left on a sidewalk, and the noise and lights made it seem far brighter than it had any right to be. At least in Darcy’s opinion. She headed in the opposite direction.

It wasn’t far to the motel where she rented a room. It would have been ideal to have an apartment, but there were few places that rented a place out. She didn’t want to live with roommates that were strangers.

There had never been any interruptions when she walked back from work. Aside from a few catcalls when she was still close to the boardwalk, she was usually left in peace. Apparently, that was no longer a thing.

She was already getting tired of the sound of motorcycles. That didn’t stop the one that had reared up from the side street she was about to cross. He stopped by her, not quite blocking her way but still making himself known. She pulled out a cigarette. It wasn’t the blond but she had a feeling she was going to need it.

He held a lighter out before she could grab hers. Her eyes narrowed at him but she leaned forward and lit it.

“Are you stalking me?” she asked as she exhaled.

“Do you want to be stalked?” he asked, grinning widely. It was the other mullet. The one with the curls. He had an easy smile, looking far more innocent than she suspected he was.

“No.”

“Why you out here? Don’t like the boardwalk?”

“No,” she said again. “Not really.”

He bit the nail of his thumb as he continued to grin at her. “So where you going?”

She took another drag of her cigarette and blew it out slowly. “Home. I’m going to bed.”

“Want company?”

She rolled her eyes. “I’m good, thanks.” She moved forward and much like the last interaction she had with one of them, he followed. “Don’t you have somewhere else to be?”

“Trust me, babe, no place I’d rather be. Can I give you a ride?”

She paused, contemplating it for a moment. She didn’t have an aversion to motorcycles but she didn’t know him. The reminder of the missing posters lingered in her mind. “I’ll walk.”

“Aw come on, I’ll be good!”

“Somehow I doubt that,” she drawled. She kept walking. There was another roar of motorcycles and she glanced at the one next to her. “You guys really travel in packs, huh?”

“You’ll like it,” he said, looking far too amused at the suggestion.

She barely got another two steps before the other motorcycles were circling her. Marko joined them seamlessly. She stood there, smoking and waiting until they finally stopped. A couple of them veered close but they finally eventually stopped when she dropped the butt of her cigarette, stomped it out and asked, “are you done?”

“Where you going, Darcy?” the blond mullet from the other day asked.

“Home. Get out of the way.”

“Come on, chica,” Paul called out, leaning forward over the bars of his bike. “Let’s party.”

She ran her tongue over her teeth before she looked at him. “Where’s Frankie?” she asked. “Last party you invited me to was with her and I haven't seen her since.” The men all started to laugh and she felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up again.

“Who?” Paul asked, blinking at her. He still had a smile on his lips and she half wished she was closer just to wipe it off of his face.

“You know who,” she snarled. They all laughed again and her eyes narrowed. “Alright, I’m done.” She moved, going to push her way past them or kick over their bikes if she had to. She was over this already.

“Darcy, wait,” the curly one said.

“Yeah, babe, we’re just playing,” Paul called out.

“I’m not. I don’t know who the fuck you are and I’m not interested.”

“Dwayne,” the dark-haired one finally spoke.

“I’m Marko,” the curly mullet spoke up.

“You know me,” Paul said with a wink. “And that’s David.” He motioned to the bleached-blond mullet who was staring at her. They were all staring at her, really.

“Pleasure,” she drawled. “Now get out of the way.”

“Darcy,” the one named David called out. “Join us.”

“No,” she looked at him. “I’m going home and going to bed.”

“Aww,” she heard someone call out. Her version swayed slightly. Join us, Darcy. Come on, Darcy. She could go out with them. Not like she had many friends or the store was that busy. She could...she dug her fingers into the pressure point between her thumb and her index finger, trying to use the pain to focus. It broke through the pressure building around her and she glanced down, reaching for another cigarette.

She lit it herself, ignoring the offer of a lighter from Paul and Marko. She inhaled slowly and held it for a second before exhaling. “I’m going home. Get out of my way.”

There must have been something in her tone because two of them finally moved back slightly, granting her an exit. She walked forward only to realize they were following. She turned and glared at them.

“I didn’t ask for an escort!”

“What type of men would we be to let a woman walk home alone in the dark?” David asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Yeah!” Marko called out. “Never know what’s out there.” That made them all laugh.

God fucking damn it. She turned and walked. They followed behind and she ignored the fact that she could feel their stares on her. She just wanted to get to bed.

They reached the motel.

“Shit, babe, you live here?” she heard Paul ask. “Just come home with us.”

“There,” she said, ignoring the blond. “You walked me home. Go away.”

They all grinned at her. “Goodnight, Darcy,” David said.

“Yeah, night babe! Dream about me!”

“Dream about us!” Marko called out, fixing Paul’s comment. Dwayne just watched her. She ignored them all and went to her room.

It was only after she cleaned herself up and was finally drifting off to sleep when she realized they never answered her question about Frankie.

---

taglist: @raith-way @ocfairygodmother @lokitrasho @zeleniafic @jewelswrites-ish @tessasocs @reggiemantleholdmyhand-tle @chickensarentcheap

[zingthesnek]

Aight since I got called a pussy by @vesselofwhiteboychad and her wife @gojocaninfinitymyass imma rant

about the dreaded webtoon lmao

(don't take this too srsly I'm too lazy to put much thought and effort into this post)

Okay so LO (lor3 Olympus)

It's honestly not that good, at all. I'm not going to say it's bad, but people glamorize the living crap outta it.

Basic plot summary: Persephone is a young adult out to see the world romance with hades yadda yadda fucked up shit happens yadda yadda. That's kind it. it's romance waddya expect something deep?

Listen I have a couple issues with LO. That mainly stem from the way ppl act like it's this great feminist love story it's not. Like it handles issues better than most cheesy romance stories, but key word being "better" not the best.

LO "promotes body positivity", literally Persephone has an hour glass figure and is petite. Very Marilyn Monroe, nothing wrong with that, but to pretend that it isn't the ideal body type for women is an understatement. She has some stretch marks and a slight belly, I'll give some props for that.

LO "handles abuse and trauma well". I'm not going to disagree with this point, it handles it well but the usage of trauma is just to make other characters look better in comparison. Like hades isn't exactly a stand up guy, he's better but the author had to make other men completely shit human beings to make him look good.

LO "is shows male abuse" again the author did the same thing but reversed it in order to make Persephone look like an amazing wonderful person UwU bean. She added minthe another shitty character. Hades abuse is still barely covered, Persephone might be getting help for her issues hades went to 1 therapy session and hasn't worked out his trauma at all.

LO falls into the traditional traps of literally any other romance shitty ex girlfriend, and creepy asshole. Like if you take away the fact it's "Greek mythology" it's just another garbage romance. Listen I love garbage romances I watch vampire diaries for ducks sake, the only thing that annoys me is the whole "it's super feminist uwu", cuz it's not.

It's a pseudo woke webtoon they added 1 lesbian couple for shits and giggles and 1 overweight character (in the background)

Listen LO is a webtoon that has the author's ddlg kink written all over it. (Yes she has a ddlg kink ask anyone who subs to her Patreon). Not to kinkshame anyone, but once you no that you can clearly see it in the story

Now I can't write romance for shit, but most of Persephone and hades interactions are them lusting after eachother, him buying her things, or delivering exposition. They occasionally talk trauma and set up boundaries, (which is good) but they don't have anything that makes me think they'll actually get along besides the fact they think the other one is hot.

Now the age gap thing is one of those things I gotta tip toe on, cuz people pull the "she's an adult yada yada".

It's not so much the fact that's she's "legal" it's the fact the webtoon gives her zero agency, she doesn't buy her own clothes, study what she wants, literally she has no desires outside of wanting freedom from her mother and lusting after hades. No goals career or aspirations. Nothing, ppl also like to go "she's a strong women uwu" she falls into the "the author didn't actually know what a strong female character is so they gave her some form of super power". Strong female characters aren't always physically strong, a strong female character is a female character who can stand on their own (without other characters) and you understand their wants, personality. The can be feminine and soft take wakana from utena or anthy himemiya they are strong female characters but aren't physically strong.

Persephone going apeshit on a bunch of villagers isn't queen shit it's a scapegoat because the author couldn't give Persephone actual motivation.

Hades is a whole nother bundle, dudes just kinda there? His main goal is a happy loving life (totally fair) but outside of his romance with Persephone he isn't doing much to do that. I won't get on the whole "he's creepy for lusting after a 19 year old" topic cuz that's a bag of worms that I agree and disagree with. Point is hades isn't the healthiest dude and has a lot to work through, he can still pursue Persephone but it would be nice to see him working through his stuff as well.

Now this is a tidbit that annoys the shit outta me so imma just put a big TW for RAPE and Virginity.

Okay so TGOEM or the concept of eternal maiden hood. First of of I hate the way virginity is used in this webtoon.

Like it's fucked up to say rape "counts". Persephone was raped so she according to the author isn't a virgin.

Again this is just a me thing, but rape shouldn't fucking count. It's not a "sexual experience" it's an act of violence. Yes it's sexual violence, but it's not and shouldn't count as your first time ever. A lot of women I know who's "first time" was rape are forever scared by it. And I personally would love it if popular media would stop portraying it as such.

It's fucked up, and the concept of eternal maidenhood isn't something that needed to be in the story. And the fact no one reached out to Persephone to explain this awful.

Yeah maybe nitpicky on my part but idc

Another thing I have no issue with the age gap per say, LO isn't for kids so my issue is mainly that the platform itself markets it towards a younger demographic and had 0 ratings. It will likely also be tV 14 when it comes out, which will also annoy me at least make it NC 17 or TV MA, but only time will tell

But listen LO is summary is a trashy romance with slightly better handling of abuse and trauma. Don't expect this grand masterpiece. I read it cuz I like trashy romance.

LO fans don't even @ me I'll block you on sight

[phantomphangphucker]

Ectober Day 31: Free Day - Something Like A Bird Chap.4: The Feathered And The Fanged

Danny says ‘not today Satan’ as a wild Vlad appears to bear witness to Danny’s winged ass.

To say Danny had been a bit tired after his parents giving him a full check over would be an understatement. They literally wanted to see every single little way his wings could move and how each and every muscle reacted to said movement. If he had any reflexes; which hint, he totally did. Hitting the bends of his wings in the right spots would cause them to kick out just like a knee. And he had a spot on his back that would make his feathers fluff out. After all that he just didn’t want his wings messed with anymore, oh and to sleep, thank you very much. Which his folks were perfectly content to let him do on the couch. Which promptly led to the personal discovery that wings were freaking awesome blankets.

Which all also led to this wonderful situation of walking up to one Vlad Masters looking down on him with a quirked eyebrow. Danny elects to not even dignify the man with a response instead he sits up, yawns exaggeratedly, stretches out his arms, and angles himself in just the right way to punt Vlad out the door via a nice big wing stretch. Multitasking, it truly is a wonderful skill. Truly.

Vlad is, of course, grumbling and scowling as he comes back in. “Must you act so ill-behaved, Daniel”.

Danny smirks, “do I look like I care what Satan thinks?”, and only smirks more at Vlad’s sigh and head shake.

Danny only vaguely pretends to be paying attention to Vlad as he gets himself some coffee. Vlad sounding almost genuinely curious, not that vampire-ass was ever genuinely genuine about anything, “I see your parents’ aren’t up yet”.

Danny tosses a cup full at Vlad, evil he may be but everyone needs a ‘wake me the fuck up and allow me to suffer through this bullshit’ coffee. “Everyone was up late, had some limby business to get up to. Far more legal than what qualifies as business to you”.

“Yes because the government wouldn’t find your developments questionable at best”. Danny actually chuckles at that, because truth. The government would love to go all creepy morally questionable evil scientist on his feathered ass. Sure they’d probably have to go through some whacky legal hoops to do it, like classifying him as not human or some shit, but he wouldn’t put it past them to try.

Danny laughs, “like you’re any better vampy”.

Vlad shakes his head, looking Danny over as he turns around, “I’m far less unnatural. Do you not even have the decency to put on a shirt? You have a guest you know”.

Danny smirks, “but it’s you?”. Shrugging, very content with having filled up his ‘annoy the heck out of Vlad’ quota so early in the day. Today must really like him. “My shirt’s somewhere on the floor”.

Danny grins like an idiot when Vlad lifts up the offending tank top with as few fingers as physically possible, “you mean this thing?”, huffing, “unacceptable, you can hardly be running around in a probable biohazard”.

“Hey”. Vlad predictably ignores him and incarnates his shirt. Like an asshole. “I liked that shirt you know”.

“Then buy a new one that isn’t covered in questionable stains that even I can’t identify”. Danny’s pretty sure that Vlad’s desired response wasn’t for him to feel proud. But that’s sure as shit what he’s feeling.

Danny grins at him a bit meanly, sounding painfully sarcastic while his ears twitch a little picking up on at least his dad getting up, “now what is this? Is the Vladimir Masters offering to take me shopping? And entirely on his dime? Oh now how could I possibly say no?”. That smile only getting more mean and smug when his dad sticks his head down the stairs and half-shouts, “that’s a great idea, Vladdie!”, bounding all the way down the stairs and moving to clap Danny on the shoulder under the wing, “no way Danny-boy can wear any of his t-shirts, sweaters, or hoodies with the wings!”.

Vlad quirks an eyebrow, speaking with very obvious venom to his voice; well obvious to anyone other than Jack, “certainly not. I’m truly surprised you haven’t blown them off him yet”.

Jack actually looks shocked by that, “what!?! Oh of course not! I’m sure heaven wouldn’t like that very much! Or Danny-boy!”, tilting his head and chuckling, “if heaven is where angels come from”.

Danny grins wide enough to hurt when Vlad chokes a little and spits out a mouthful of coffee, going wide-eyed all the while. Checkmate Vlad, whatcha gonna do now? “Excuse me?”. Danny’s almost impressed Vlad doesn’t sound nearly as baffled as he definitely has to be.

Everyone looking to Maddie as she comes down, scowling at Vlad for only a second before smiling at Danny, speaking as she ruffles Danny’s hair up, “it’s really all that makes sense. He just finally developed enough holy energy to form his wings and halo”. His dad excitedly flicking the clouds to make them spin around, “and! It explains his ecto-contamination! Angels are purifying after all! So he’s just purifying the town!”, Jack nods to himself and puts his hands on his hips, “the town certainly needs it!”.

Danny sighs, still grinning a bit, “dad, I’m not a walking filter”. Vlad just looks to him, a clear expression of ‘how in the name of all the Ancients did you pull this off?’ and ‘do they seriously believe that line of bullshit?’.

Jack laughs, “a walking, or flying, dehumidifier but for ectoplasm would be a better comparison!”, which Danny rolls his eyes at a bit fondly.

Maddie smiles and nods a little before speaking somewhat seriously at Danny, “though you really do need a new wardrobe. I doubt you have many tank tops”.

Danny grumbles with fake annoyance, “well I have one less that’s for sure”. Which Vlad smirks slightly over. While Maddie looks to Vlad, “and while I don’t know why you would offer to take Danny shopping, we certainly haven’t budgeted for it”, sighing like this is almost painful for her, “so we’ll accept the offer”.

Vlad grins immediately and Danny is mentally smacking himself for being a serious dumbass. Of course shit like this would backfire on him. That is exactly his kind of luck. Hopefully, this won’t go horribly. Maybe. Probably though. This is Vlad he’s talking -thinking- about here. “Why Maddie dear, it brings me nothing but joy to help young Daniel out in times of need”.

Danny gives the most pained and sarcastic, “yay”, he can muster. Which earns him one incredibly smug smile from Vlad. However, Danny is the one grinning meanly when his dad announced that they will, in fact, be taking the GAV and that he’s driving. Since Vlad immediately looked like what’s left of his life just flashed before his eyes.

Vlad, in an almost painfully obvious attempt to stall, holds up a finger, “well, I think Daniel here should acquire suitable-”, he glares at the ash on the floor as an obvious attempt at emphasis, Danny just rolls his eyes, “-attire. Now luckily, I just so happened to plan for such a predicament”.

His mom gives an impressively dry, “really”, as her only response to that. Which Vlad, of course, completely ignores, instead simply nodding curtly and promptly disappearing out the front door he had not too long ago been tossed out of via Danny’s well-aimed wing. Danny’s going to cherish having successfully done that.

Vlad returns almost suspiciously fast, telling Danny that the man had very explicitly planned for this. Which means the son of a corpse probably would have ruined his -still one hundred percent wearable, fuck you- shirt anyway. Danny eyes the purple velvet? fucking Ancients, vest draped over Vlad’s arm. Which he absolutely knows he can’t put on his damn self with his folks here and his dad would absolutely make him wear the ‘gift’ from dear old godfather Vladdie. Curse his luck. His dad as it is looks excitedly... excited.

“Smart thinking V-man! And it has buttons too!”, looking to Danny, “which would certainly be easier to get on. If you got that tank top on, then you’ll definitely have no trouble with this”.

Vlad, surprising no one but his dad, waves him off, “nonsense. Vests of quality are best shown how to be worn by experienced hands”. Making Danny mutter a very quiet, “fuck you and your anterior motives”, at him. Which very obviously just makes Vlad smirk.

Danny just sighs and swallows what little of his pride he actually actively has and turns around to let the fucking prick ahem he means Vlad slide it over his wings. But he does snap his wings open to full length rather aggressively and nearly knocks Vlad over. He would have, if the man’s reflexes weren’t on point.

Vlad blinks and shakes his head, “there are times where I do believe you are more dramatic than even I. Which is no small feat, Daniel, I would know”. Danny will absolutely take that compliment. Regardless Vlad does slip the vest over his wings, Danny rolling his eyes over definitely being able to feel that the prick is examining them as he goes. Danny eventually having to put his arms back after way longer that this should have taken to get the vest over his arms, Vlad was clearly drawing this shit out. Why did he let him do this again? And why didn’t he make sure the local vampire stayed out after he punted him out.

If Danny wasn’t in front of his folks he absolutely would be smacking Vlad’s hands off him or commenting very heavily on the major creep factor of this being perfectly fitted. And Vlad clearly knows this, based on the stupid smirk anyway, as he did up the buttons with precision. Though Vlad smoothing the vest out afterwards was seriously pushing it, and absolutely earned the surprise fingernail-sized ecto-beam straight to the knee. Take that you vampiric twat. Vlad scowls at him without missing a beat.

-

By the time they get to the mall, Vlad is just barely managing to not look frazzled. With the man, of course, smoothing out his suit as they hop out to cover up his slightly rattled nerves. He does make a point to mutter just loud enough for Danny to hear, “I know I have said this before, but your father drives like he is seeking death. Which I must say, there are far easier was to achieve”.

Danny snorts, whisper-snarking back, “what? Like offering his corpse up to you willingly? Maybe on a nice cheese platter?”.

Which Vlad actually has the audacity to give a confident, “yes”, in response to. Pompous ass.

Danny decidedly ignoring -and honestly barely noticing. It was hard to notice these kinds of things when you were the entire town’s certified freak and resident weirdass- all the staring and even pointing he’s getting, which is mostly over the wings. Not entirely, just mostly. Which is weird, freaking wings deserve way more attention and finger-pointing than the fact that he, Danny Fenton, was in a fucking velvet vest and with the freaking mayor; who also just so happens to be bloody stinking rich. This town has issues. So many issues. Probably every issue. Expect gangs. Wait, has there ever been gangs in Amity? Tilting his head, “I wonder, do you think Amity has ever had gangs?”.

Vlad rolls his eyes and gives an oddly bitter, “of course, every town has one or two, Daniel”.

Jack grins, “actually no!”. Both halfas looking at him disbelievingly. Which gets Maddie to explain, “we may have mistaken a few trouble makers for ghosts and covered them in goop”.

Danny can’t help laughing at that, “you know?!? That surprisingly makes sense as a crime deterrent!”, and laughs a little more. Vlad just looks at his folks like they were both slightly nuts. Everyone’s attention gets grabbed by who Danny’s sure is one of the middle school girls running up and holding out a book. Which Danny has some serious ominous feelings over where, exactly, this was going. So he’s honestly not surprised when she blurts out, “could you sign my bible”. Vlad turns to the side and actually looks to be trying not to wheeze in disbelief.

Danny just blinks down at her, “you’re asking me that like I know god personally”.

She gives the single most innocent, “you don’t?”, he thinks is possible.

Danny lowkey doesn’t want to crush her tiny little spirts but come the fuck on, dear Ancients. “... no. No I do not. Sorry?”.

She only pouts for a second before shoving the bible at him slightly more. Cheeks puffed out, “still. Angel’s an angel”.

Danny tries to make his sigh not seem too pained, it is truly very pained though. What’s next? Were priests going to ask him to speak at services? Or was a church going to start up around him? Oh! Maybe he’d wind up with someone ‘reinterpreting’ the bible to find references to him. That of course would totally escalate into him being on prayer beads and crucifixes. Which was a little on the nose considering his rather self-sacrificial ‘job’. Which also made it kind of funny. Was he gonna wind up an important part of what was basically the most dominating religion ever with a ridiculously sketch history? Eh, he’s probably totally jinxing himself here. “Aright kid”, at least being asked for autographs wasn’t actually uncommon for him, “where you want it?”, looking to his family... and Vlad, “anyone got a pen?”.

Vlad smirks at him, “there's one in your pocket, I do believe”, meaning Vlad put one there.

Danny squints at him for a solid minute, “go back to Hell, Satan. No one loves you except Baphomew”.

“That is hardly my cat's name, Daniel”.

Danny just rolls his eyes as he fishes out the pen that absolutely is in his pocket. Though snickering a bit when he noticed the look that borders on bloody murder that the girl is throwing Vlad’s way. Like she was taking Danny’s petty insult genuinely. Speaking while taking the bible, “he’s not literally the Devil, he’s just cold-hearted enough to seem at least closely related”, promptly signing the inside cover and having to make a damn point to not put down ‘Phantom’. And making the ‘y’ all fancy like by putting little doodle wings coming off the curved end. At least she seems happy with it, giggling after looking at it and running off while waving back at him. Danny chuckles over her still throwing Vlad a dirty look.

Danny looks to Vlad, “wow, it’s like she thinks you murdered Christ. Wonder why that is”. Vlad gives him a definitely unamused look.

Danny gets yoinked out of his mild pissing match with his archenemy by his dad grabbing his arm and pointing at their go-to fashion stop. Which no. Danny is not wearing spandex. Especially considering getting a loose tank top on and off was already difficult without intangibility. “No happening, dad. In fact, never happening”, which yes was him actively crushing his dad’s dreams just a little more. But seriously. Nope. He has some shame and pride. It is still intact, it’s honestly a miracle.

Jack sags, “awww”, but that poutiness barely lasts a second before he’s perked right back up, pointing and heading off to the local ‘teen’ hip/popular fashion store. Which yeah, he usually bought jeans from there. Shirts? Ha, no. He didn’t feel like going broke for some name brand shirt that’s no different than what he can get from the discount store. At one time he preferred the local used store, but most people’s clothing never lasted long enough to make it to there in one piece; unless it was truly hideous. Had tons of shoes though, which saved his wallet more than he liked to admit. He was stupid hard on shoes.

Danny shakes his head at Vlad holding up a DC tank top, “that’s ugly. I’m not wearing something just because it’s got some brand name bullshit on it”.

Vlad rolls his eyes, “brand names say a lot about your worth and self, Daniel. Though I hardly expect you to know that. Mind you, if you try for Ed Hardy, we will be having words”.

Danny scrunches up his face, “do you think I’m fucking blind?”. Even in a pinch, Sam wouldn’t stoop to that. She’d show up in garbage bags saying something about dressing sustainably and recycling first.

“Sometimes I wonder”. Danny throws a t-shirt directly at his face. Though fine, his fashion style could suitably be called dumpster-chic most days.

Hovering to wander off to where his dad is also grabbing up a really awful fashion disaster, some two-toned plaid thing that’s probably marketed as ‘vintage western’ or something. “Dad no. I’m not the fashionista version of a lumberjack. Or queer enough to have an ingrained love of plaid. And even if I was, I still wouldn’t pick that”. His dad doesn’t even look offended at that, which means he likely agrees.

Danny watches him then pick up a ‘it’s not gay if he’s dead’ shirt with his dad looking almost in shock, making Danny actually have to float to sit down because he’s laughing so hard. Vlad glancing over and quirking an eyebrow, “now I feel rather reminded why I don’t shop at these sorts of stores”.

“Whatever boomer!”.

“I am not a boomer, you know this Daniel”.

“Sure thing, boomer”. Vlad smartly keeps his mouth shut this time, obviously looking to avoid more of Danny’s bullshit.

Maddie smiles at Danny but shakes her head at the shirt, “I will never understand teens love of that spook”.

Danny snickers while standing up, “well some sure think he’s got the personality and behaviour of a real angel. And the fly by the cuff ways of his are ‘manly’ or whatever to the jocks”. Vlad snorts at that from halfway across the store in the more ‘business casual’ section. Ha. That’s not happening either. Vampire-ass would have to literally kiss his ass to get him into that. Danny would take high-class professional professional over ‘business casual’ any day.

Though the patchwork button down with the elbows and shoulders fashionably cut out isn’t horrible, Danny’s still not wearing that on principle alone. So Danny shouts, “NOT TODAY SATAN!”, loud enough to make the guy jerk and get the entire store's attention. Vlad physically sighs and turns to glare at him. Danny raises a wing over his face in a bastardised version of ‘talk to the hand’ before Vlad can say jack shit.

His mom finally gives him a little light in the darkness of ‘preppy but trying to seem edgy’ fashion, holding up a little ‘evil nasa’ tank top with the bottom all shredded, “okay yes, we’re finally getting somewhere here. Nice”.

Vlad sighs exasperatedly as he rejoins them, “I see no point in that, if you wanted to look like you got attacked you could simply go out and get attacked. Shred it yourself”,

Danny looks to him, “you know what else I could shred”, and looks him up and down like that was a threat to every single piece of clothing he owned.

“I would like to see you try”.

“Is that a challenge”.

“Yes”.

Danny turns to his mom, “hey mom, you got a bazooka handy?”. She grins maliciously, “why yes I think I do”. Vlad looks like he has just been gravely wounded. The sales lady looks over to them, “for my sanity, please don’t. I’ve been awake for forty-nine hours”.

Danny chuckles, grabbing up the few tank tops that seemed suitable, the lady leading the four of them over to the dressing rooms, “personal record?”.

“I wish”.

Danny chuckles, “I feel ya. I’d offer a Death-spresso, but I think I’m the only one allowed to drink those and that’s only because I proved that shit wouldn’t kill me”.

“I welcome death”.

Danny actually wheezes at that as he loads up the dressing room, “mood”, then struggles into the probably too small dressing room. Having to cram his wings around, which holy shit thank everything he could use intangibility because he seriously could not pull literally anything over his arms or wings right now. Hell getting his wings remotely unfolded was straight-up not happening.

Stepping out to pose, “it’s decided, dressing rooms are the devil”. His dad laughs loudly at that.

Thankfully they wind up walking out with all of the tops -excluding an orange one that he’s positive his dad grabbed purely because it was orange- and with nothing getting blown up! Though Danny sighs when Vlad beelines for the ‘fancy rich asshole’ store that Sam’s parents’ bragged about shopping at. Mostly her mom. Knowing his luck he’ll run into her. In fact, that is emphatically what is going to happen.

Aaaaaannnnnnnd that’s exactlaly what happened. Yay. Spotting her as he’s standing in the dress-shirt section while wondering how the heck Vlad thinks they’re going to find anything he can wear here. Lovely. Her, of course, noticing him. Because how the Zone wouldn’t she? He had wings. And immediately making a beeline for him. Eh, this might as well happen.

She stops next to him and folds her hands over her waist, “excuse my interruption, I just wanted to apologise for certain past behaviours”.

Danny blinks at the lady with oversized earnings and a bubblegum pink sundress, “what?”.

She shifts almost like this is physically painful for her to do, telling Danny she so totally doesn’t actually want to apologise but thinks she has to. “Me and my husband's treatment of you has likely interrupted your duties. So I am apologising. I realise things work in mysterious ways and that maybe Samatha was a test, with you to supervise”.

Danny groans and mutters to himself, “oh god fuck”, and shakes his head because he is so not dealing with this from ‘I’ll put a restraining order on you’ Mrs. Manson. “Sam’s not some test for you to struggle through. If anything, she had to struggle through you”.

She never gets a chance to respond to that beyond looking overly offended as Vlad is just suddenly there, “I find I must agree. You are quite insufferable”, glancing at Danny, “both of you”.

Danny smirks, “I thought the point of the Devils fall was to suffer. To never know love or affection and never grasp what he seeks”. Vlad blinks, “I’m almost impressed by how mean that was”, looking to Mrs. Manson, “you're still here?”.

Mrs. Manson blinks at him and looks entirely offended before obviously cluing in who, exactly, this was, “oh Mayor Masters!”, glancing between him and Danny, “you two... know each other”.

Danny snickers while Vlad rolls his eyes like this should be supremely obvious, “of course. I am the boy’s godfather after all”, and grumbles almost too quiet for Danny to hear, meaning he probably didn’t actually mean for Danny to hear, “though I’d be better as his actual father”.

Danny walks past him whispering, “in your dreams only, frootloop”, and leaves Vlad to deal with the rich obnoxious lady. Easily catching her fake cheery, “oh I didn’t know that! Well then this is certainly the best place to bring the young angel shopping”. Sometimes Danny forgot Sam’s family were religious.

Danny finally, finally, finds a section with more wing-suitable clothing. Never thought he’d shop with that in mind. He’s honestly not too surprised that his folks didn’t follow them in, probably went to get food instead, since he’s pretty sure they’re banned from this store. He has no clue if that’s Vlad’s fault or his dad’s. This is also the exact time that one of the tailors, or whatever they’re called is fancy ass stores, decides to actually dignify him with some attention. Guy probably thought Danny, being well himself, wasn’t actually going to buy any of this crap. Which yeah, normally would be the case but fuck vests were actually a genuinely good idea. Probably the only piece of layering he could wear now. Unless he goes around cutting big ass holes in all his hoodies. Which, yeah he’s probably gonna do.

The guy nods at him as he’s looking at the backs of some of the tops. And speaks sounding oddly commanding, “straighten up”. Danny quirks an eyebrow but does as he’s told. He’ll play along, see where this goes.

The guy promptly starts manhandling the base of his wings, like a full blown feel up. Squishing the feathers together, figuring out the width of the bone and muscle, space between his wings, even pokes at his back muscle. This feels excessive. “Oddly, I feel like making another I feel like a hooker joke”. The guy just makes a tsk sound at him before running off, or sauntering, whatever, he walks like he’s rich. Like Vlad, but with less hidden villainous energy.

The guy comes back not seconds later with a few different vests, “I’m sure a racer back of this style-”, holding up the first from the pile he brought, “-would give you more comfort and range of motion. Definitely more than what you’re currently wearing”.

Vlad, once again, appears out of nowhere, “indeed. I couldn’t exactly know the precise width between his wings”, looking to Danny, “I am not psychic, Daniel. But I made an educated guess”.

All three jerk a little from Jack shouting from outside the store, “that’s our Vladdie! Always a thinker!”.

Vlad scowls, “your faith in me is truly endearing”. The way he said that making it clear he found it nothing close to endearing. The tailor guy also scowls and makes hand motions to shoo the man off. Ah okay, it was totally his dad’s fault. Which makes Danny snicker a little.

The guy immediately gets back to business, laying out a few other styles. Pointing at one that didn’t even technically have arm holes just kinda looked like it went around the neck, down the back, and over his stomach. And another that went around the neck, over the chest, and around the waist. “Now these ones are a bit more on the feminine side but you’re muscular enough to pull them off”, gesturing to Vlad with a thumb, “he’s not”. Vlad looks suitably offended for a second and Danny snickers some more, he officially likes this tailor guy. Then pointing to the last he brought over that was basically just the same as the one that went over hsi front but with sleeves attached, “now this one will give the illusion of wearing a more traditional vest and is usually what we recommend for men who have to wear bulky upper back braces. But I’m sure it’ll work for our purposes today”. With that Danny promptly gets effectively pushed to the fitting rooms. Not changing rooms because this place fits things to size. Aka it’s expensive as fuck. And knowing Vlad, he’s going to wind up with at least one of every style and the man will be tickled green by the end of this.

The sad thing is the vests were stupid easy to get on, minus the racer back but that one was more comfortable than his current shit. And fine, he looks good in it. And yes, Vlad’s grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

“Now as for colour, obvisouly you’ll need at least one in black, I’d recommend the most traditional one, the racer back. The rest are more on the eccentric side, especially without a jacket over top. For those I’d recommend green and magenta. Those are your colours after all”.

Danny blinks, “heh?”. Vlad muttering, “eloquent”, though also looking slightly confused.

“Those are the colours typically associated with you, Daniel, as the principal guardian archangel”, tilting his head, “though I take it you don’t remember about that”.

Alright, Danny thinks the angel thing is one hundred percent going too far now and being taken way too seriously. “Uh, well I’m not a pink kinda guy. And no”.

“Ah well, you were said to be in charge of the gates to ascension and one of the highest ranked angels in the universe. So I’d take the compliment”.

Danny blinks as he guy rushes off, looking to Vlad, “are you having an aneurysm, because I’m having an aneurysm”. Vlad actually sputters, while Danny pulls out his phone to wiki some shit. Blinking down at the screen, “oh you’ve got to be shitting me”. Because yup, apparently there’s an angel called Daniel. His half-life is some serious bullshit, he’s still absolutely positive he’s not actually an angel though. Because come on.

Vlad swallows, “well, one afterlife certainly exists. Another isn’t unreasonable”.

“I will smite you, devil”.

Vlad huffs a laugh, “oh I hardly believe this, boy. Don’t take me for a fool. We both know why this happened”, Danny crosses his legs up in the air purely to emphasise that fact, which Vlad hums at, “precisely. Though the angel argument has some merit to those unaware”.

Danny rolls his eyes and plants the soles of his shoes back on the ground as the guy comes back. Black, green, and one purple vests in hand.

Danny honestly isn’t surprised they leave with enough clothing that someone without super-strength would have a hard time carrying it. And thankfully his folks want to go home now, meaning Vlad has to suffer through his dad’s driving just that little bit more. Not that Danny cares or knows why the prick doesn’t just go his own way at this point.

He gets his answer though when his parents run off to a suspiciously well timed ghost alert from city hall -Danny can tell there is not a ghost there- and he feels himself promptly getting tasered in the side.

Jumping sideways after regaining his balance from very suddenly being back in touch with gravity and scowling at Vlad, who's pocketing the Plasmius Maximus with a smirk, “Vlad seriously?!?”.

Vlad doesn’t dignify him with a response immediately, instead transforming and making a swipe at him. Danny flapping to use the air to get him out of the way quicker. Surprisingly, it works. Vlad floating up into the air, “you need to be able to defend yourself regardless of form or power, boy!”.

Danny rolling his eyes and sidestepping a pink ecto-beam, “you’re still not my mentor, you nut-case. Besides, aren’t we taught to ignore the teachings of the devil”.

Vlad forms two duplicates and sends them lunging around the sides at him, the main Vlad shooting another ecto-beam at him. Considering how Danny’s back is practically against a wall, the whacko is clearly trying to get him up in the air. “You don’t have much of a choice right now, do you Daniel”.

Danny just scowls, mentally says ‘fuck it’ and jumps up to avoid the beam while smashing his wing wrists into the two duplicates as hard and fast as he can. The air force that blows at the ground forcing him up into the air, but he uses it to plant his feet on the side of the wall giving the illusion of defying gravity. While the two duplicates pop out of existence. Danny smirks to himself over the flash of surprise on Vlad’s face. That’s what a fucker gets for underestimating him. Haha.

Vlad gets much more aggressive about the ecto-beams and blasts after that. Which fine, effectively forces him off the ground and into the sky. He’s mentally thanking Mrs. Testlaff for forcing him to effectively practice flying, his folks too. Though as he twists to dip sideways he knows Vlad can tell this isn’t easy for him. This kind of flight was just so freaking different and he wasn’t used to it yet.

“I swear you just want to satisfy your urges to assault minors!”, and goes low to the ground again, actually getting a chance to land; without crashing! Which then gives him something of a wicked idea that might cause some property damage, because if the weak-ish not aimed at the ground thing he did earlier launched him into the air a little then what would happen if he gave one big-ass flap directly over the hard surface of the road. Spreading his wings out as far as he can, crouching down and aimed slightly towards Vlad, who’s looking slightly cautious.

Needless to say Danny goes off like a freaking missile, leaves a crater in the ground from the sheer air pressure, and the shock wave pummels Vlad for only seconds before Danny gut punches him as he zips past. Sending Vlad flying.

Danny just glides up high in the air for bit, hidden by the clouds and trying to locate Vlad again. The wind up here felt really really cool though. It was actually really nice. Comforting even. With floating it really didn’t matter how high up or low down you were, it all felt the same. But like this he can feel the air pressure, the thinness of the air, how wet or dry it was. He feels like he could just be carried off by the wind and relax. He snaps his attention to refocus though when he spots Vlad, who’s looking around cautiously but also like his victory is assured.

Ha. Not a chance.

The really stupid annoying thing is, as he positions himself to dive bomb the guy, Vlad had a point. Him being attacked in human form happens and he can’t always run off to transform. He can’t let his wings be a hinderance more than their size technically already was. Tucking his wings and flicking a bit for a sideways spin, which will look freaking sick if it actually works, and diving down; gravity doing most of the work. He’s high enough up to get some serious velocity. Hey maybe sciences wasn’t totally useless for him.

The only problem with this, Danny thinks as he rapidly smashes into Vlad who doesn’t even get the chance to turn intagible before both of them slam into the concrete, is that he can’t see for shit due to the world spinning around rapidly. He does hear Vlad transform back, so success, though.

Both of them groaning from inside the crater. “Daniel, if you ever do that, to a human, you will kill them. Ancients”, groaning again, “though fair play to you”.

Danny does a weird hybrid of a chuckle, wheeze, and groan, “pleasure doing business, with ya, frootloop. Least I didn’t, break anything”.

“The road might, disagree”.

“That’s, your problem. Mr. Mayor”.

“It’s ghost-related. Governments problem”.

“Ha. Point”.

“Are you going to, get off me”.

“You’re the one, with intangibility right now”.

“Surprisingly, I find I don’t, really feel like it”.

“Then you can lay there and, eat my feathers”, Danny flops a wing on the guys face, groaning slightly from the movement though. Oh he is so going to be feeling this tomorrow.

Eventually the two do indeed get up. Vlad straightening his jacket and trying to act like he doesn’t have a serious forming bruise on his stomach. While Danny is shaking off debris from his wings. It really does feel like he used them to punch an entire road. Just as his folks get back. Maddie bursting out of the GAV, “what happened to you two?!?”. Jack sticking his head out, “was it a ghost!?!l”.

Danny chuckles awkwardly though sending a slightly mean chuckle Vlad’s way before answering his folks, “turns out my wings make for pretty good ghost shields”, changing to a rather mocking tone and side-eyeing Vlad, “saved dear Vladdie’s suit from even a single little singe”. Vlad just huffs and gives his suit a tug that feels very final.

Jack laughs and claps Danny on the back while Maddie shakes her head and ushers everyone inside.

Everyone sitting around the table and enjoying comfort drinks, yes even Vlad, when Danny snorts hot chocolate out his nose at someone shouting, “WHY ARE THERE GODDAMN CRATERS IN THE ROAD EVERY DAMN TIME I VISIT THIS FUCKING TOWN!!!”. Danny puts his head down on the table and laughs.

[sebastianshaw]

RP Meme from The Lost Boys

I told you to stay off the boardwalk.

Hey, I liked that song.

I don't see any boogeymen or nasty guys.

Wait. That's from my era!

That's the ocean air.

Smells like someone died.

Looks like he's dead. No, he's just a deep sleeper.

If he's dead, can we go back to [PLACE]?

What's wrong with this picture? There's no TV. Have you seen a TV? I haven't seen a TV.

You're the only woman I ever knew who didn't improve her situation by getting divorced.

A big legal war wasn't going to improve anybody's situation.

Ouch. My hair.

Talk about the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

We've got some rules around here. Second shelf is

mine. That's where I keep my root beers and my double-thick Oreo cookies. Nobody touches the second shelf but me.

There's another rule around here, and I want you to pay

close attention. Don't touch anything. Everything is exactly where I want it.

There are some bad elements around here.

You're telling me we've moved to the murder capital of the world?

If all the corpses buried around here were to stand up all at once we'd have one hell of a population problem.

I just like to read the TV Guide. Read the TV Guide, you don't need a TV.

I was so worried. Don't run off like that.

We were that age, too, once. Only they dress better.

You have a generous nature. I like that in a person.

So how may I help you this evening? We have it all.

I look that needy, huh?

You're chasing that girl, aren't you?

I'm at the mercy of your sex glands.

Don't you have something better to do than follow me around all night?

Just scoping your civilian wardrobe.

Listen buddy, if you're looking for the diet frozen-yogurt bar, it went out of business last summer.

That's a very serious book, man.

Only five in existence.

Where the hell are you from? Krypton?

Nobody drives this baby but me.

We have to let it warm up a little. Hear that sound? Just like a baby pussycat.

That's as close to town as I like to get.

It's a pretty cool place. If you're a Martian. Or a vampire.

Are you guys sniffing old newsprint or something?

You think you really know what's happening here, don't you? Well, I'll tell you something. You don't know shit buddy.

This is just our cover. We are dedicated to a higher

purpose. We're fighters for Truth Justice, and the American

way.

Think of it more as a survival manual.

There's our number on the back and pray you never need to call us.

I'll pray I never need to call you.

If you want your ear pierced, I'll do it.

I came this close to being called Moon Beam or Moon Child Or something like that.

I can't beat your bike.

You don't have to beat me, [NAME]. You just have to try

and keep up.

Just you! Come on! Just you!

That's what I love about this place. You ask, and then you get.

I can never sleep with the closet door open, either. Not even a crack.

Don't sneak up on people like that!

What, you don't like rice? Tell me [NAME], how could a

billion Chinese people be wrong? Come on!

You're eating maggots. How do they taste?

Sorry about that. No hard feelings, huh?

Drink some of this, [NAME]. Be one of us.

Give me those sunglasses.

You need sunglasses to talk on the phone?

Are you freebasing? Inquiring minds want to know.

Anything in here that might pass for after-shave?

Have a big date tonight, [NAME]?

Lose the earring, [NAME]. It's not you. It's definitely

not you.

All you do is give attitude lately.

Go take your bath.

What did you do to my dog, asshole?

I didn't hurt him. He bit me. This is my blood.

Why did he bite you, huh? What did you do to him?

He was protecting you.

Look at your reflection in the mirror. You're a creature of

the night, [NAME]. Just like out of a comic book.

My own brother/sister/friend/etc, a goddam shit-sucking vampire.

You wait 'til[NAME] finds out!

Just let me talk. Wait a minute! [NAME]!

You did the right thing by calling us.

Does the sunlight freak him out?

He wears sunglasses in the house.

He always had bad breath, though.

He's a vampire all right. Here's what you do.

I can't do that! He's my brother/sister/mother/friend/etc!

You better get yourself a garlic T-shirt, buddy. Or it's

your funeral.

I think we have to have a real long talk about something.

[NAME] help! He's coming to get me!

[NAME], help me! Open up! Help me! [NAME], open the window!

So what are you, the flying nun?

We're gonna work this out. We*re gonna work this out. Trust

me, okay?

I thought I saw something on my window, but I guess I got carried away.

I would like to have a personal life too.

Can I sleep in here with you tonight?

You smell like garlic.

What's happening to me, [NAME]?

I don't know how to help you.

Aren't we friends anymore?

Then let's act like friends. Let's talk.

We could talk about anything you want to talk about.

I have more serious things on my mind than girls and school. Things I'm dealing with.

Looks like I wasn't the only one who got lucky last night.

The dog chased my mom like the Hounds of Hell from Vampires

Everywhere.

We've been aware of some very serious vampire activity in

town for a long time.

[PLACE] has become a haven for the undead.

As a matter of fact, we're almost certain that ghouls and

werewolves occupy high position at City Hall.

Kill your brother/sister/boyfriend/aunt/best friend/etc, you'll feel better!

Look, it says here that if you kill the head vampire all half-vampires will return to normal.

Does he know who the head vampire is?

You'll have to kill him. And if you don't, we will.

Vampire require a daytime protector, a guardian to watch

over them as they sleep. Fierce dogs, the Hounds of Hell,

are often employed for this purpose.

Truth, Justice, The American way triumphs.

Smells good. When do we eat?

Are we gonna have company again?

Well, you are the man of the house and I'm not coming in until you invite me.

He promises to behave if you come back.

I didn't know you were having guests.

Our batting average isn't terrific, is it? Zero for two.

You're so sweet to him.

I don't know what got in to him. He's not like that.

If you ever want to see [NAME] again, you better come with

us now.

Initiation's over, [NAME]. Time to join the club.

Don't kill me, [NAME]. I'm basically a good kid, so just

don't kill me.

Just work with me and I can help you. You'll be okay.

Is she one of them?

You shut the window and lock your door.

She's one of them! And don't tell me it doesn't make her a

bad person, [NAME]!

Yes, and it's my fault. You would've not met me, if I

hadn't liked you. I tried to warn you.

You drank someone's blood? Are you crazy?

We're not them.

Why didn't you kill me last night?

You're supposed to be my first.

What are you doing here? What do you want from me?

Don't kill anybody until we get back to you!

I got connections.

The night crawler. The bloodsucker. El Vampiro.

I don't want you going down there.

Look, this isn't a comic book, [NAME]. These guys are

brutal killers.

Who'd you rather go down in with you? Them or me?

If something happens down there, I won't have the strength

to protect you.

This time I'll protect you.

Even though you're a vampire, you're still my brother/sister/friend/etc

If you try to stop us, or vamp out in any way, I'll stake

you without even thinking twice about it!

Where did you say you met these guys?

Don't you touch her. Stay away from her.

Flies and the undead go together like bullets and guns.

There must be coffins here someplace.

I thought they'd be in coffins.

That's what this cave is. It's one giant coffin.

Right now they're at their most vulnerable. Easy pickings.

Remember. You just have to kill the leader.

We don't know which one he is.

I guess we'll just have to kill them all.

What's that, a little vampire humor? It wasn't funny.

Good night, bloodsucker.

We blew it, man! We lost it!

We unraveled in the face of the enemy!

They pulled a mind-scramble on us!

We don't ride with vampires.

"Burn rubber" does not mean warp speed!

Your dog knows a flesh-eater when he smells one.

The sun goes down. They'll be looking for us.

[PLACE] is crawling with vampires

They're coming to the house as soon as it gets dark!

I'm gonna see [NAME] tonight, and you're trying to ruin it for me.

I don't know what you don't want me to see.

I'm not talking about [NAME]! To hell with [NAME]!

Good. That's just the way we like it.

We've got a date tonight?

They'll be coming for all of us.

It's just old memories coming back.

Why are you so jumpy tonight?

He seemed so sincere, but it's insane.

Tell me. I promise not to laugh. Honest.

I think I should warn you all when a vampire dies, it's never a pretty sight.

Some yell and scream. Some go quietly. Some explode. Some implode. But all will try to take you with them.

Don't go out there! Stop him!

I say we terminate them right now.

You're mine. You killed [NAME]

Try the holy water, dead breath!

I nailed one of them downstairs with a bow and arrow.

We trashed the one that looked like Twisted Sister.

We totally annihilated his night stalkin' ass!

Death to all vampires!

We are awesome monster bashers!

Holy shit! The attack of Eddie Monster!

Stop! Get away from him! Just stay away from him! He's just

a little boy.

You're afraid to face me, [NAME]?

I tried to make you immortal.

You tried to make me a killer!

Stop fighting me, [NAME]. I don't want to kill you. Join us.

It is too late, my blood is in your veins.

Don't let them see me like this.

What happened to your face?

I knew it. You are the head vampire.

You're the secret [NAME] was protecting.

Don't ever invite a vampire into your house, you silly boy/girl/etc.

It renders you powerless.

Has everyone gone crazy? What's the matter with all of you?

It was you I was after, all along, [NAME]

It was all going to be so perfect, [NAME]

Just like one big happy family.

Great. The bloodsucking Brady Bunch.

I still want you, [NAME]. I haven't changed my mind about that.

I didn't invite you this time, [NAME]

Don't you touch my mother/father/son/dog/etc

Don't fight, [NAME]. It's so much better if you don't fight.

How much do you think we should charge them for this?

One thing about living in [PLACE] I never could

stomach--all the damn vampires.

[thenightling]

That fucking stupid “General rule” about writing that people keep parrotting here on Tumblr

I don’t have the patience or kindness required to be polite about this.  I recently learned about a “General rule” in writing that is circulating on Tumblr.  That General rule being that you can write characters who are part of a group different from yours but you shouldn’t make them the main protagonist because you should only write what you know.

This, children, is called “Stick to your own kind” and it’s a form of bigotry disguised as woke.  

You CAN know things through research or through talking to people who are different from yourself.

Imagine if someone told Alexandre Dumas he couldn’t write white people.  Suddenly we wouldn’t have The Three Musketeers or The Count of Monte Cristo.

Imagine if someone told Deborah Warner she couldn’t write white men.  Suddenly no Demon Under Glass (a very fun vampire novel.)

Imagine if someone told Mary Shelley she couldn’t write men. Suddenly no Frankenstein or his Monster.

You essentially are telling women who prefer to write from male perspectives that they are invalid...

Imagine if someone told Neil Gaiman he couldn’t write anyone other than Jewish English men. Suddenly no Coraline, no Shadow Moon, no Death of The Endless...

One person just tried to give the example that able bodied person shouldn’t try to write a character who has a disability as a main protagonist and that characters with disabilities should strictly be written by people with disabilities.  Hell no!  I love Daredevil and honesty, no one else could have written him quite like Stan Lee.  

How fucking DARE you, you self-righteous asshole!   How DARE you!   By your reasoning Daredevil couldn’t exist, one of the only heroes to ever appeal to the visually impaired.  We would be denied him because he was created by a able bodied man.  And we’d have to wait and hope someone with a disability comes up with something equally as good because Stan Lee is unworthy!?

The Shape of Water wouldn’t exist.   Ever notice the pearl clutchers who call it ableist usually never actually saw it / don’t realize The Creature really was an immortal river God,  And never actually ask the vocally impaired what they think and just assume they’d appreciate their righteous anger?

I know a nearly totally blind man who loved Quest for Camelot and yet people bitch because Garrett never regains his sight. That. is. the. point.   It shows that you can have a happy ending and still have a disability.  Do you know how many stories about disabled characters essentially tell kids they can’t have a happy ending unless some miracle makes them like everyone else?  And if you tell these self-righteous asses that we’re grateful that a blind man got a happy ending that didn’t require him gaining sight, they switch gears to complaining that it was written by someone with perfect eyesight.  So fucking what??!

If the character is written well and respectful, why should it matter?

If all the protagonists were just physical duplicates of the author do you know how many Bella Swans would start floating around on us?

Sometimes it’s good to write a MAIN character who is very different from yourself, physically, and mentally,  It helps you to grow as a person to see from another point of view.

And anyone who tries to say Stan Lee shouldn’t have created Daredevil because he could see just fine... Fuck you.   Fuck you with something hard and sand papery. I’m done being polite to people who think they can speak on my behalf.

Sincerely - A visually impaired (borderline legally blind) demi panromantic woman, who sure as Hell doesn’t mind the likes of Neil Gaimain (and others who don’t fit the demographic) writing characters similar to me.   STOP speaking for me, you self-righteous, assholes!

[textsfromcastlevania]

CVTV S2: First 3 episodes impressions/liveblog

Thoroughly unpolished Thoughts and Feelings about season 2 of Netflix CV below the cut.

EPISODE 1:

* Oops, I love Godbrand. Unless someone new and funnier comes from the wings, slutty viking vampire is already my favorite.

* I thought I’d feel differently seeing him in motion, but no, I still don’t like that they took away Isaac’s hair. I admit this is partially informed by my selfish personal investment in redheads, but STILL.

* What I do love about the new Isaac: That accent. Hot damn, son. The dots as a more animation-friendly substitute to his face tattoo work well also.

* I am very happy they kept Hector’s basic backstory in there, and his love for animals. 

* “This is where you’re supposed to tell me that I’m not alone. You are really not very good at this.” No, no he is not. <3

* Don’t ya think putting Alucard literally in half-light, half-shadow was a liiiittle too heavy-handed? Just a little.

* THAT LIL’ POWERHOUSE ANIMATION ENDSLATE. Okay, powerhouse, you got me. That’s wonderful.

EPISODE 2:

* That intro conversation. <333

* I...am experiencing so many emotions at Alucard saying fuck. I was pretty sure he was legally prohibited from saying fuck.

* Bi Carmilla! Bi Carmillaaa! \o/

* Awww, Alu smiling while talking about his mom. 

* Since I watch everything with subtitles on, I’m noticing that the captions this season have far more errors in matching what is actually said than the first season did. It’s nothing that changes the meaning of the sentences, but it’s still off rather frequently.

* ALUCARD. STOP TALKING ABOUT HUMPING. Did you kiss your mother with that mouth?

* There they are. The boys. They’re back in town.

* I tend not to physically emote when I’m watching something, but my jaw literally dropped at Isaac’s backstory scene. SOMEBODY HELP THIS BOY. ;A; From a storytelling perspective, I also think it’s a really good backstory to explain his motivations for joining Dracula, which is something we didn’t get in the game or manga.

EPISODE 3:

* Oh nooo Hector smiling at the monster. That’s too precious, help.

* Speaking of too precious, Sypha’s “open sesame” has given me life.

* L E O N !

  L

  E

  O

  N

  !

* Huh, wow, Alucard’s being way more of an asshole than usual. I’m used to him being totally socially inept, but damn, that’s just malicious.

* Other things that make me happy: Trevor’s excitement at the Morningstar, Godbrand eating shit on the staircase Benny-style.

Overall, I’m liking this season so far! General note that I’m loving the music this time around. That beautiful Irish tune playing when the crow was flying in Ep 1 really stood out, the ambient song in the Ep 3 flashback is A+, and the library scene also had fantastic ambiance. Definitely better and more memorable than the first season’s soundtrack. Two thumbs up.

[tessatechaitea]

Team Titans #16

I'm fairly certain that this is some of that 3-D art that was popular at the time. I'm also fairly certain it's a dick.

"Oh no! My horse was shot straight up the asshole!"

Image Comics changed the face of the comic book industry in many ways that smarter people than me actually know about. But one of the ways that people don't talk about as much (unless they do. I don't have time to actually read about comics or research them or interact with other comic book fans in any way except to make a disgusted face when they try to speak with me!) is how, immediately following Image Comics push for creator's rights, DC decided to create and trademark characters by every name they could think of. "Here are a bunch of characters created by committee that we can get our writers to use instead of creating their own and then expecting royalties on those stupid characters we own and don't legally have to pay extra for, you Goddamned vampires! Fucking Image Comics! Suck our dicks!" Team Titans had to be a reaction to this new mindset. The premise of this terrible comic book was that thousands of superheroes from the future were sent back in time to save their future. And most of those characters had terrible names, like Redwing and Gunsmoke and Battalion and Sparkle Boy. Evidence from the letters pages suggests that this comic book was expected to last long enough that audiences would see what happened to hundreds of these teams. About the same time this series was hitting the shelves, DC put out their summer blockbustr, Bloodlines, which was just a blatant attempt to create as many new heroes as they could come up with before writers began expecting created by paychecks. I'm not sure how well it worked though since Hitman is probably the only hero created at that time that anybody could now name. And also, maybe Garth Ennis gets a created by paycheck for him? I don't know! How should I know?! Remember that part about how I don't do research?! In conclusion, Team Titans can be criticized harshly because it was never meant to be a work of art or a coherent story or entertaining at all. It was just a repository for new characters that DC editors could later mention to new writers when they came on board. "Oh, you don't want to create your own character that you would really be into and thus probably write a terrific story about which would help make DC a lot of money even if we had to pay you creator's rights on it! Maybe you'd rather write a story about Loose Cannon or Joe Public or Cardinal Sin?!" Years later, that editor might be wind up looking at the top selling comics of the month to discover the writer who they drove away was writing a hit comic book with Image Comics because it was the story they wanted to tell but didn't know how to tell it using Loose Cannon as the main character. Meanwhile, Terry and Donna had a baby that didn't grow up to be an evil narcissistic time traveling world conqueror. I sort of forgot about that.

"Stop being hysterical, Donna! Listen to me, a failed history professor, when I downplay our child's potential illness!" -- Terry Long, typical man.

I can't wait until Donna's child's skin sloughs off and he's revealed to be a mutant lizard monster. Then Donna can be all, "I told you something was wrong!" And Terry can be all, "You just live for these moments, don't you?! Wonder Girl! Always right! Can't do anything wrong! Won't let her husband live it down that he failed to write his book on mythology that would have given him a tenured position at NYU!" And Donna would be all, "I never bring that up! You need to let that shit go, you stupid bastard!" And then Terry can be all, "Our child is a lizard because you probably fucked some mythological creature during those months I couldn't get an erection because I felt like such a failure!" And then Donna can be all, "Why are you still even in these comic books?!" And then my writing teacher can be all, "Is this really how you want to write dialogue? With all the 'so-and-so can be all's?!"

Oh look! I was right about Lobo still being used to increase sales. I think this was right around when Lobo was being used on any series that wanted to prove that their hero could beat the unbeatable Lobo, thus turning Lobo into a punching bag and a loser. Which maybe he always was but look at how cool he looks! And at least he's only a genocidal monster and not a pedophile like Deathstork!

The rest of the comic book seems to be Jeff Jensen's attempt at art. That's my guess because he's doing something different and that means it must be art! The final nineteen pages are narrated by Nightrider, the vampire, as he's shot by a neighbor, crawls off to die, and then infiltrates the dreams of the other members of the Team Titans. That's not the artsy part though! That's regular comic book stuff. The artsy part is that Jensen tells the narrated story through the second person point of view. I always think of it as the Choose Your Own Adventure perspective. Maybe Jensen thought the reader would actually give a shit about Nightrider if they were put in Nightrider's bloody shoes? It's a decent attempt since if Nightrider were telling the story through the first person, I would read it while constantly thinking, "Is his name really Nightrider? Did I misread that? I should go back and check where Terry says his name. Let's see. Yep! It's really Nightrider. What a terrible name! Although I'd read a comic book where he teams up with Gunsmoke, sort of like Iron Fist and Luke Cage." But since the story is told in the second person, I completely forgot to think about Nightrider's dumb name because I was distracted by the use of the second person. Instead, my thoughts were these: "What the fuck is Jensen doing?! This is so awkward! It's like when my cousin began writing essays and stories at Mission College and he wrote them all in the second person because I'm pretty sure the only books he ever read were The Cave of Time and The Mystery of Chimney Rock!" So congratulations, Jeff Jensen, on completely succeeding at taking my mind of Nightrider's name which, I guess, means I cared a little more about his story? Not that this story where he crawls into a cave to die concentrates on him and his pain anyway. It's more a storytelling trick to catch up the reader on all of the angst and pain and turmoil the other Titans are suffering through. Poor Nightrider! He's not even interesting enough to carry the story when he's dying!

Yeesh. Mirage dreams she "gives birth" (quotes because I don't think this portrays normal birth!) to her baby, conceived when Deathwing raped her, after which her baby threatens to rape her.

After a bunch of mysterious images and bits of story that make the reader believe they've seen some clues as to the future direction of this comic book (but actually haven't seeing as how none of the dreams mentioned how they'd be cancelled in nine more issues), the neighbor who shot Nightrider clambers into the cave and cradles him in his arms. "I won't let you die," he screams to the Gods! "Even if I have to let you suck my dick!" He glances around furtively. "That's probably how your life will be saved, right?" he says as he unzips his jeans. Team Titans #16 Rating: A+ because it was artists making an effort, I guess. But this comic book wasn't for me.

[many-gay-magpies]

sorry i’m so late 😭 i’ve been meaning to get to this for a while. irl stuff has gotten hectic to say the least unfortunately, but i am here now!

now i’m thinking abt the vamps doing ~mild crime~ to get around after they escape the orphanage and i Love it. jakah would be a Stellar pickpocket and i think noa too, he can move in darkness, steal smth, and not be seen at all. jaan can just generally beat up people who get too suspicious, jino lights campfires for them when they can’t get shelter and have to sleep outside (yes ik vampires can’t feel cold and see well in the dark but idc), shion with his mind-control powers (which are . barely mentioned in the webtoon or webnovel??? cuttoons my beloved) persuading people to let them stay in their homes for a night, solon staging wolf attacks so the livestock disappearances aren’t suspicious. maybe noa got so good at sleeping upside down and climbing stuff bc they’d regularly break into barns and things to get shelter for a bit and he would hide from the owners in the rafters. just . the group as a bunch of little ruffians committing their little crimes

“when you get your memories back, we’ll celebrate all your birthdays” OW. MY HEART. PAIN. sooha being the one to metaphorically slap the brothers awake (or physically, she’d slap them anyway!) from their “plan” of just getting through immortal life is so great to me. just imagining her like “wait so y’all have never tried laser tag?” and they’re like “no wtf. what is that.” and she’d be like “oh right y’all were literally born a million years ago.” “actually it’s just a few hundr-“ “ANYWAYS WERE GOING TO LASER TAG THIS WEEKEND BC CLEARLY YOURE NOT USING YOUR IMMORTALITY WISELY” and dragging them to fun, stupid little things because what good is an immortal life if you don’t fill it with happy memories unique to every time period you’ve lived?

- vrvr anon

ahh its np!! life happens, but like you said, youre here now! [and as a bonus i waited (see: forgot) to answer this for three days to even the field a bit LMAO]

BUT ANYWAYS yes. crime. who doesnt love a bit of crime here and there? for legal reasons this is speaking strictly in a fictional sense YES pickpockets jakah and noa! people at decelis THINK their brothers call them the "terror twins" (despite them not being twins) because of how deadly they are on the nightball field, but REALLY its because of how they used to tagteam pickpocketing from the upper class when they were fresh out of the orphanage. JAAN BEATING UP PEOPLE THAT GET TOO SUSPICIOUS YES GO VIOLENCE. maybe a particularily large asshole is threatening to out them as vampires and jaan is just like *cracks knuckles* "well ig its about time to pull out the big guns" meanwhile shion next to him is like "...you know i can just erase that guy's memories right-" "nOPE IM DEAF NOW CANT HEAR YOU. GONNA BEAT THIS GUY UP NOW" (IF the memory-wiping is something shion can even DO that early on—it would be interesting if it isnt, and instead its a more specialized skill he develops over time, because then their only resort at the start really WOULD be jaan beating people into submission to keep them from telling)

i can totally see shion using his mind-control to coerce people into giving them shelter-- and then when the brothers leave he tells them "just remember, we were never here, alright?" so that the host forgets and cant tell the orphanage anything if they come calling. theyd absolutely sneak into barns for shelter/rest, and now im thinking about them getting really familiar and friendly with farm animals because of it, and really having a soft spot for them even far into the future—like the school goes on a farm field trip or something and heli is, like, REALLY good with the chickens and the farmers are impressed and asking him stuff like "oh have you been on a farm before?" and he has to physically stop himself from blurting out "yeah when my brothers and i used to sneak into peoples' barns to sleep as kids (their early vampire days probably seem like a childhood to them, in a way) i got really good at calming down the animals" (which. also now that i think about it adds a small level of angst to them killing and eating the livestock on some of those farms. but we dont need to talk about that <3). i also absolutely agree with noa get at good at climbing because of climbing in the rafters of barns, and solon staging wolf attacks to make the livestock disappearances less suspicious—they probably wouldnt have to do it that often, either, because an entire cow (if they knew how to properly drain it) would probably sustain them all for a while. little ruffians committing their little crimes!

NO BCS NOW I HAVE EVEN MORE FEELINGS ABOUT THE BOYS' IMMORTALITY AND ABOUT SOOHA TEACHING THEM TO (METAPHORICALLY) LIVE AGAIN. because now im just thinking, the vampires' lives (that they can remember) basically consist of just the orphanage, the escape, and then running—and nothing else for a long, long time. they had to run for so long with the threat of the orphanage hanging over their heads that it just became the norm to them. the threat's still there today—it will never completely be gone, and so, the running will never stop. it's all they know. then sooha comes along, and her existence—her new, bright presence in their once-closed circle—kicks them into realizing that theyve been existing rather than actually living their (non-) lives for the past several centuries. after sooha HERSELF realizes this, she gets a bit aggressively sad/indignant for them and everything theyve missed—have they ever even BEEN to a modern movie theater?! to a water park? to an arcade?? have they been on a road trip, an actual road trip, meant for sight-seeing and experiencing things rather than endlessly running from whatever's behind you? when they go into town on the weekends, is it to have fun, or is it just performative; just to seem like all the other kids at decelis? did they even do that before she showed up? i just have a lot of feelings okay (and so does sooha)

however now this brings a happier scenario to mind—wherein sooha is giving the boys this big impassioned speech, making them realize how much theyve missed while thinking that running was all their lives would ever amount to, and then right at the end of it she yells, full of anger and pain for them, maybe a little teary-eyed; "just because you died doesn't mean you can't live!!"

silence. they all sit there blinking as the realization of what sooha just said sinks in— sooha herself equally dumbfounded. then, the entire atmosphere diffuses as they just burst out laughing; the full-bodied, hysterical sort of laughter that's been pent up for a while, making them fall out of their chairs or off their beds and struggle to breathe (or, well, in sooha's case anyway). they exhaust themselves laughing and then, when they FINALLY catch their breath (both metaphorical and literal), theyre in cozy enough states of mind to have a serious, but significantly more comfortable conversation about everything, and about the plans theyre going to make for all the activities they've missed that sooha is going to introduce them to. i like the idea of them maybe making a pact to do one new thing every weekend, whether it's going to the movies, going to a karaoke bar, or just having a sleepover as a way to teach the boys how to enjoy life again, and also give them some good-old friend group bonding time :)

[rydenbolt]

Hotel + Jewelers ( combined because yay! )

“Your skin is… so smooth right now, oh my god…” Bellamy ran the soft pads of her fingertips over a sharply chiseled cheek bone, careful not to nick it with her long, shiny black nails, filed to a sharp point. A small gasp escaped her lips at the sensation.

“Girl, I know, right?! It’s, like… baby’s butt!” Ryden looked up into the rear view mirror, pushing his sunglasses to the top of his head. He checked himself out, still amazed at the glossy shine on his skin and the incredibly good shave he’d had done. 

“What did you get done?” Bellamy inquired, sitting back in the passenger’s seat of her champagne colored Maserati Quattroporte which Ryden currently steered away from Antoinette’s, where they indulged in a three-hour long pampering on Bellamy’s account. Before that, it was a fancy brunch and shopping, where Bellamy took the opportunity to make Ryden give her her own private modeling show, trying out all the fashionable brand articles he wouldn’t otherwise be caught dead in simply for the fact that they were more expensive than all the clothes he’d ever owned in his entire life. She bought them all for him, every single piece she liked, and although he grumbled and knew he’d probably never wear them ever, he humored her because she insisted on spoiling him and was happy for it.

Then they were at Antoinette’s, sipping on iced tea and getting mud baths, enjoying a salt room and a sauna, Ryden falling asleep and snoring loudly during his shiatsu while Bellamy skimmed through latest fashion magazines while getting her pedicure done. Now they just stopped by a KFC drive through, paper bags of food scattered all over the vehicle, slurping on their cold Pepsi cups.

“Uh… I think it was…” Ryden thought about it for a second, trying to remember what nice smelling gunk they put on his face. “A green tea peel-off?? Somethin’ like that?” 

“Oooh, yummy~ I love those!” She approved, toeing out of her Gucci sandals and lifting her feet up on the dashboard, perfectly polished black toes wiggling against the windshield. She slurped loudly on her Pepsi, just enjoying the taste as other benefits of such beverage were lost to her. 

“Home, baby doll?” He inquired and the petite blonde nodded. “Spend the night? Miles is busy today, and you know how I hate sleeping alone.” She batter her long eyelashes at him, making him snort. “If your boy comes over, barkin’ at me for bein’ in, I swear I’ll toss him out the window, girl.” 

“He won’t! He knows we’re just friends. I talked to him about it.” She reassured but Ryden knew she was secretly looking forward to the day they’ll finally spend time in each other’s presence for more than five quick minutes. She could deny it all she wanted but the young wolf knew Bellamy liked a bit of drama. Just a splash.

Pulling over at her house, she stopped him before he parked the car. “Can you just come over into the garage first? I need someone to put some boxes away for me, if you don’t mind.” Of course he didn’t, although he knew Bellamy could probably lift things twice her weight. She bounced out of the car and into the garage ahead of him and when he followed in, he found her sitting on the hood of a brand new cherry-red Mazda MX-5 sports car, a huge pink bow pasted on the windshield.

“Ta-dah~” She spread her arms, legs almost swinging under her. Ryden grinned, eyebrows shooting up in surprise. “Like ya don’t have enough cars in that airport-size garage o’yers.”

“No! It’s for you, silly~” She jumped off, grabbing him by the hand to drag him into the house while he was still stammering and confused. 

“You’re shittin’ me, right?!” He glanced over his shoulder at the gorgeous vehicle again, in complete disbelief.

“I told you I’m spoiling you today.” She reminded him, delighted at his loss for words. 

“So… you bought me a 25k convertible roadster???” He pointed out, following her into the house, toeing out of his combat boots in the hallway. “That ain’t spoilin’. That’s insane.”

“Well you’ll look cute in it.” She defended, like that was a completely legitimate reason to buy something really expensive for a friend.

After Bella fixed them a jug-full of homemade martini - Ryden drank one glass before he switched to plain ol’ beer - they settled in front of a TV set on the large couch in the living room with a huge bowl of popcorn, ready for a movie marathon of Legally Blonde. Because Bella reminded Ryden of Reese Witherspoon in that one so much, a marathon just had to happen. It was a quick one though, since there were only two movies out.

“So…” Bellamy started, throwing a popcorn into her mouth. “Did you really think I’d never find out that April 10th is your birthday?”

Shoving a handful of popcorns into his mouth, Ryden almost kind of choked on them in surprise. “That was today? Blimey, I totally didn’t notice.” He faked cluelessness which was so obviously not real, making Bella raise an eyebrow at him. 

“You are such an asshole sometimes, we’ve been friends for a year now and I’m apparently not good enough to know when’s your birthday, I mean, seriously puppy? You really thought I wouldn’t find out??” Ryden pursed his lips at the chastising, looking away while he endured it because he was guilty - guilty of not reciprocating properly and not always trying his best to make his relationships be a two-way street.

“I want puppy cuddles tonight.” Bellamy declared, slim arms crossing over her chest, sharp chin sticking out stubbornly. 

Ryden’s eyes rolled before he gave her the look of a person utterly annoyed that there was no way he could wiggle out of this particular blackmail.

“You’ve been a wolf for more than a year and you’re in perfect control! It’s going to be fine.” She was right there though - Ryden learned how to handle his wolf form incredibly fast, retaining memories after every shift and having almost full control of his actions unless driven by a very strong instinct. He was no longer a walking hazard, at least not to a vampire of Bellamy’s caliber. 

Swallowing the mouthfull of popcorns he’d been chewing on, Ryden rolled his eyes, finally giving in. “Fine…” This made Bella clap excitedly and she slid off the couch to go and change into her cute frilly pink baby doll - not any of the ones she wore when with Miles, of course, as those were mostly see through and definitely too revealing. In the meanwhile, Ryden took the opportunity to shed his clothes and shift.

Done with her evening beauty routine, Bellamy slipped into her bedroom, doing quick work of making the bed more comfy - which meant as many pillows piled onto it as possible until it looked more like a pillow fort/nest than a human bed. “C’mon, puppy~” She summoned him with a click of her tongue, to which a humongous, grumpy wolf wandered over, complaining with a soft growl-whine.

Bellamy had seen Ryden shift a few times before, but it never stopped amazing her how abnormally enormous he was. A direwolf was a pretty accurate comparison - the black canis lupus would take up almost the entire king-sized bed with his large, fluffy form, the mattress denting under his weight as he climbed up. After he’d settled, sniffing the pillows and kneading them before he stretched and plopped down, she crawled in, snuggling her entire body against the thick fur coat. 

“Wow, you are, so soft and fluffy~” The compliment earned her a little lick over her cheek, after which she’d buried her face into the softness of his neck, falling asleep in a matter of minutes, feeling safe, protected and not alone.

Though that lasted for only a couple of hours, until Ryden picked up on a call from a distance by a fellow wolf, deciding to answer back in a loud howl at the ceiling which shook the entire house from its foundations and set off at least a couple of car alarms on the street. With the ringing in her ears, Bella had a hard time going back to sleep, leaving the king sized bed to the big puppy who had no trouble taking over the entire mattress and rolling on his back to continue his nap alone.

@thisbrutalbelle

[kpop-imagines-247]

Prompts for March 9th to the 16th send in requests

Before requesting please read the rules.

Okay, so these next two weeks quick write prompt list are down below. Each week there will be a  different theme. I will also finish up any request that was for last weeks that didn’t fit in with the AUs that I was doing. The types I will be writing are fluff, angst, sad, and suggestive(But not full on smut.)

I will be writing for these groups there are also some new groups that I am going to attempt to write for :

EXO (ot12)

Super Junior

NCT 

Astro

Monsta x

Got7

B.A.P

Ikon

Eric Nam

Min Kyung Hoon

Shinhwa

Sechskies

Block b

Aomg

Vixx

AU’s:

Demon

Mafia

Vampire

Werewolf

Royal

CEO

Angel

Military

Marriage

Bodyguard

Ghost

Serial Killer

Soulmate

no/ non-au.

Please, no suggestive request for underage idols or newly legal idols.If you have another idea for a prompt that isn’t listed please include it in your request  

Example of a request: Hello can I please have a vampire AU with Wonho from Monsta X including the sentence starters # 1 and 18 can it please be a  slightly suggestive angst to fluff.

Prompts:

“You’re hair is so soft.”

“I’m not going to leave you. You’re never going to suffer by yourself again I promise.”

“If I could, I would kiss away all of your scars.”

“Mmm….You’re warm.”

“I can’t believe I got the first date, let alone a year.”

“We live together. You can’t blame this on anyone else.”

“Is that my hoodie.”

“You’re mine.”

“Did I fucking stutter.”

“You mean the world to me.”

“Marry me!”

“Don’t touch what isn’t yours.”

“Who do I have to kill now.”

“If you ever touch her again, I swear, you will wish all I did was hit you.”

“You’re NOT wearing that out.”

“New plan: We keep her alive and sell her organs you can get a lot of money for kidneys.” “NO! You weren’t supposed to kidnap her in the first place! Take her back NOW.”

“You could have gotten yourself killed!” “But…I didn’t”

“Please don’t leave me. I am a work in progress but I’m trying.”

“Shh you’re are safe. I won’t go.”

“It’s not a double date, we are just third and fourth wheeling.”

“I want to take a shower so you should probably join me. It’ll save water.”

“You can’t solve your problems by hiding in bed all day.”

“Are you hurt?”

“Because I love you.”

“Prove it.”

“It’ll always be you.”

“He’s the opposite of friendly. His unfriendly, as in, don’t be friends with him.”

“This is the person that took everything from me and I can’t let them take you too.”

“And you didn’t tell me this until now?” “I didn’t think it was important…”

“How sweet sacrificing yourself for her, when did you get a heart.”

“Everything I’ve done is for you, you’re the only thing in the world that matters to me.”

“I thought they killed you, I am glad I thought wrong.”

“Darling, can you please stop randomly summoning me? I was mid-conversation.” “but I missed you.” “You could have called.”

“Don’t make me take you home and punish you.”

“I know he’s trouble but I don’t care.”

“Everyone keeps telling me you’re a bad guy.”

“So how old are you really.”

“You need to eat.” “No, I don’t want to hurt you Y/N.” “Please, b/n you are dying.”

“Your eyes….they’re beautiful.”

“The thought of losing you scares me.”

“Then I will wait until you’re ready, for you, I’d wait forever and then some.”

“You’re too damn perfect.”

“Did you just lick the side of my face?” “I claimed you.”

“Thank you for loving me no matter what, even though I piss you off a lot.”

“Tell me this when you are sober.”

“Step away before I punch you in the face.”

“Tell them to fuck off.”

“I love you, you enormously stubborn pain in the ass.”

“I’m one of the few people in the world who can murder you and leave no forensic evidence behind.”

“Why do I still like you knowing you’re a total asshole.”

“Take this, don’t ask questions.”

“Please don’t abandon me-not like everyone else.”

“Don’t you dare try selling your soul for me.”

“I can hear you crying, you know. At night, when you think no one is listening.”

“If I have to die, I want you to do it. It has to be you.”

“How did you die?”

“You could have died, I could have lost you.”

“I am going to do what I should’ve done from the beginning and stay out of your life.”

“I want to go home.” “And I want to go to the moon. It ain’t happening sweetheart. It’s time to accept that.”

“I thought you of all people would understand why I do this.”

“I trust you, wholeheartedly.”

“You shouldn’t have gone by yourself.”

“If you make any noise, they’ll find us. So be quiet.”

“I don’t wanna hurt you.”

“Isn’t this illegal.”

“I wanna hear you say it.”

“You’re worth every second of my time.”

“You came for me.”

“I did it to protect you.”

“That was an order.”

“Hey, hey calm down they can’t hurt you anymore.”

“You’re bleeding all over my carpet.”

“Tell me you need me.”

“Who did this.”

“Don’t try to fix me, I’m not broken.”

“Take my jacket, it’s cold outside.”

“I never imagined myself in a wedding dress.”

“You deserve better than me.”

“You’re part of the family now, don’t ever think you’re not.”

“It’s me! It’s me! Calm down baby please.”

“Promise me you’ll come back.” 

“I missed you so fucking much.”

“Stay safe.”

“I don’t want you to stop.”

“I’m not afraid of you so don’t think I am.” “You should be, you’re stupid if you aren’t.” “I do a lot of stupid things and falling head over heels from a (Supernatural being goes here) is one of them.”

“Baby (it’s) just two years.”

“But I love you 24 hours a day.”

“You have no idea how pretty you are when you wake up from sleep.”

“Don’t worry about your weight. You’re already beautiful the way you are.”

[theangelmojo]

4am Wiki Adventures

I typed “Lord Byron” into Wiki. Don’t ask me why. Those early morning hours, you know.

And I knew stuff about him before, but not stuff. Not like the stuff Wiki can, so I was not prepared for the awesome of Lord Byron. 

This guy’s insane, like, he is The King of Le Drama. The biggest drama-llama to ever ding-dong, I stg. He takes extreme to a whole new level. Like, you know those posts where they go “well that escalated quickly”, he is that. 

So I have some facts I’d like to share. Random facts. Hilarious facts. Facts that are totally unnecessary and unimportant to know, but are the thing I am probably gonna think about for the next solid week. 

Hold onto your hats, folks, we’re in for a long ride. 

1. His father was a douche. Only married women for their money, bled them for that money, stuck babies in them and then ditched them. What an asshole.

2. He had Issues with his mom, who was understandably depressed because of her asshole husband, and reportedly called her “short and fat” (assholery is genetic, probs). In return she had Issues with him, but also spoilt him and is part of the reason Byron is well known for being stupid with his money (also genetic, probs). 

THIS CONTINUES FOR A WHILE, SO I’LL PUT THIS UNDER THE CUT TO SPARE YOUR DASH, SORRY

3. He started falling in love with people at a reaaaaally young age. Like, whoa son, steady on chap. His first crush was a distant cousin (Mary Duff) at the age of 8, who he then forgot about till he turned 16 and found out she was gonna get married. Then he remembered her and was like oh heck, how will my heart go on and wrote a big paragraph about it, wherein he acknowledged the fact that his feelings were ridiculous but nevertheless intense and true. 

4. That one wasn’t a sexual love though, apparently, but he also acknowledges that he started developing shall we say certain ‘cravings’ at a considerably young age. He claims this is partly the reason why he writes like he does. In his own words: “Perhaps this was one of the reasons that caused the anticipated melancholy of my thoughts — having anticipated life.”

5. At this point there are a bunch of people who want to claim that his, how shall we put it, ‘young sexual awakening’?? is the reason for his “sexual propensities”. Like, no dude, he’s just bi. Accept it.

(I’d like to cut in here and say that the next fact made me very sad. Very very sad. 4am Me was not prepared for the sudden hit of sadness and started sniffling a lot. Prepare yo’self.)

6. There are reports that he was sexually abused as a kid. One of his abusers was one of his caretakers, Mary Gray, who was later dismissed when he turned 11. She also used this abuse as a way of keeping him silent about the bad company she kept. I mean like, holy shit, that is such a nasty bitch. My god, I hate reading about stuff like this. (4am in the morning and I whimpered “poor baby” to myself, blinking through tears) Then this guy called Lord Gray De Ruthyn, who was also one of his mother’s suitors, also forced himself on Byron. The poor little guy was “deeply disturbed by this” (no shit) and apparently never told his mom, which in hindsight is probably part of the reason for his Issues with her. My god, this guy was so destined to be an angst-writer. Jesus Christ. 

And then some asshole historians or god knows who have the audacity to suggest that these events led to him having sexual liaisons with men at college like what the fuck. How many times do you have to say “he was bi” till it gets through their fucking skulls mother of god --

Moving on.

7. Onto the more interesting and hilarious facts. His first male loves were found at Harrow, where he found a fondness for a bunch of lads, all named John. John FitzGibbon, John Thomas Claridge, John Edleston, John Cam Hobhouse. Must have been real confusing trying to navigate all these Johns, but one thing he knew for sure is that he definitely likes boys too. 

8. Proof of him liking them boys is him pouring all his fucking money on them. This guy was such a freaking Sugar Daddy. Jesus. He left £7000 in his will to a 14 year old boy he met in Athens who taught him Italian. I mean, the sum of money got cancelled, but still. Come on, By. This isn't even the only time he shoved his money at a guy, no siree, but we’ll get to that part later.

9. The most likely reason he left England was because of his reportedly incestuous relationship with his half-sister Augusta Leigh. Ugh. Okay, this one grossed me out, but he like, had children with her too, apparently. Around this time he also got married to Annabella Millbanke and had a kid (Ada Lovelace!!) with her, but their marriage was too shit and she thought he was insane so she left him. All this scandal forced him to leave due to all the rumours circulating, plus the fact that he was majorly in debt too at the time. No surprise there.

10. Once he left England, he never came back. He went to Belgium. Then to Switzerland, where he met another John -- John William Polidori, who became his physician, and there he also befriended Percy Bysshe Shelley, and Mary Shelley (née Godwin). He had another affair with another lady, this time Clair Clairmont, who was Mary’s stepsister. Got her pregnant too. 

11. This lovely bunch of drama-llamas then got rained in, and due to the shitty weather they were stuck indoors for 3 days. During this time they read a bunch of cool horror stories, which then inspired them to write their own. Yes guys, this is where Frankenstein was born, but not only that -- John William Polidori also wrote The Vampyre (with a Y) which is The Start of the romantic vampire genre. That’s right folks -- thanks to this guy, we have Twilight. (But in all honesty, his story is far better, go check it out.)

12. Byron is super clever. No surprise there, but an example of this is that he learnt the Armenian language and culture well enough over a couple years to write books on it. He was passionate about Armenian culture and history, dude, like he proper went for it, and his writings and teachings inspired a wave of Armenian poets and writers. Not bad, Byron. Not bad.

13. Dude falls in love every-freaking-where, and not casual love, oh no -- he falls madly in love every fucking time. Where does he get the energy? God only knows. This time he falls for this 18 year old Countess, Teresa Guiccioli, and ends up eloping with her. Thing is, she’s married. (Byron NO)

14. Byron likes animals to the degree that Damian Wayne likes animals (sorry for the Batman reference, but I can’t help it, it’s who I am), ergo: he loves them. In one of Shelley’s letters, he describes the house as such: “Lord B.’s establishment consists, besides servants, of ten horses, eight enormous dogs, three monkeys, five cats, an eagle, a crow, and a falcon; and all these, except the horses, walk about the house, which every now and then resounds with their unarbitrated quarrels, as if they were the masters of it… [P.S.] I find that my enumeration of the animals in this Circean Palace was defective… I have just met on the grand staircase five peacocks, two guinea hens, and an Egyptian crane.” Get on that, Dami. You’ve got a long way to go to reach this level.

To add to this fact, he also had a Newfoundland dog called Boatswain (???) who he loved so much that when the animal contracted rabies, he nursed him “without any thought or fear of becoming bitten and infected.” (cue: 4am Me hysterically sobbing about this). Also, even though he was in debt at the time, Byron commissioned a funerary monument to be built for Boatswain at Newstead Abbey, which was the only building work which he ever carried out on his estate. The thing was bigger than his own grave, and in his 1811 Will (what is this guy with Wills), he requested that he be buried with him. Also, he wrote a 26‐line poem called "Epitaph to a Dog" in honour of Boatswain. That is some serious dog-love there, you have to give him that, and as I said before: he never falls casually in love, only ever madly.

ANOTHER THING. I’m just gonna quote this straight from Wiki cos I can’t put it any better: “Byron also kept a tame bear while he was a student at Trinity, out of resentment for rules forbidding pet dogs like his beloved Boatswain. There being no mention of bears in their statutes, the college authorities had no legal basis for complaining. Byron even suggested that he would apply for a college fellowship for the bear.” Byron, my man, that is So Extra. (“What’s that? I can’t have a dog here? Well, no problem, I’ll just get a bear.” “BYRON, Byron what the fuck. Where did you even get a bear? Bears aren't indigenous to England.” “He’s very intelligent. Loves to read. Heck, lemme get him enrolled here.” “Byron what the fuck.”)

15. Skipping ahead a little, he ends up in Genoa, right, and gets Bored. Probably because of lack of pets. Possibly because he’s not Fallen Madly In Love with anyone recently, though he’s still technically ‘with’ the Countess, let’s be real -- this boy isn't good with commitment. So, he gets bored and this is where he starts getting involved with the movement for Greek independence from the Ottoman Empire. He realises he still has his lady with him but cannot join this military movement whilst she’s still around, so he ends up shipping her back to her dad (dick move, Byron). 

Then this guy called Edward Blaquiere tries to recruit him, and Byron realises he has no fucking clue what he’s meant to be doing. In his own words: "Blaquiere seemed to think that I might be of some use-even here;-though what he did not exactly specify". Get it together, Byron, FFS. He boards a ship called Hercules (ha ha) to go to Greece, and the poor Countess lady weeps while waving him goodbye, but then Hercules has to return to port, so that dramatic farewell wasn’t nearly as dramatic as he’d probably been hoping for. Oh well.

Moving on -- 

(-- okay, to be honest, I kind of glossed over the whole part with his involvement in the war. I mostly picked out the parts that stood out to my 5am Brain, which were mostly to do with money or the boys he was eyeing. No offence meant in the way I’ve interpreted things. I fully blame the fact that I should have stopped reading Wiki five hours ago, but didn’t, and also I have a dumb sense of humour.)

16. Byron chucks money at the Greeks. Where did he get this money? No one knows, but he gives the Souliots £6000. Then, to be fair, he gets fed up of them asking for more and more money. He cuts off the Souliots and tells them to get stuffed. 

At some point he sells his estate, Rochdale Manor in Scotland, which gets him some £11,250, which means Byron has something like £20,000 altogether, all of which he plans on giving to the Greek cause. “In today's money Byron would have been a millionaire many times over, and the news that a fabulously wealthy British aristocrat known for his generosity in spending money had arrived in Greece made Byron the object of much solicitation in a desperately poor country like Greece.” Byron, old chap, that is super generous of you but what the fuck. I kept thinking to myself, reading this, what the fuckkkk?? Like, the cockles of my heart were warmed, but my brain couldn't comprehend it. May I remind you, he got into this because he was B O R E D, and now he’s throwing all his money at this ??? What even a r e  y o u  B y r o n ? ? ?

I don’t mean to make any judgements here, but this is then where Byron draws some Attention to himself again. Throwing all this money around -- it’s no surprise that suddenly all the different Greek factions start to fight over him, and in my 5am Brain, all I could see was Byron being like “kids, pls, stahp” and getting all exasperated with it. In Wiki’s much better written words: “he complained that the Greeks were hopelessly disunited and spent more time feuding with each other than in trying to win independence.”

17. As a little ‘aside’, whilst all of this is happening, Byron falls in love. Again. Madly. To another boy. This time his Greek page, Lukas Chalandritsanos, who he spent some £600 (equivalent to about £24,600 in today's money) over the course of six months on, and wrote his last poems about his passion for. Holy hell, Byron, control yourself please. And then Wiki slams down the coldest line to all this drama and goes: “but Chalandritsanos was only interested in Byron's money” -- and I’m sorry, I almost peed myself laughing. Omg Byron, that is cold. 

18. Spoiler alert: Byron dies young. He dies at 36, just before setting sail on an expedition. On 15 February 1824, he falls ill and then, my friends, comes the usual, in the form of the typical historical medical fuck-up remedy of bloodletting. When I read this I legitimately SMH, because how many books have I read where they use bloodletting to try to cure someone and SHOCK HORROR, it ends up killing them? Poor guy gets made worse by it, makes a partial recovery, but then catches a violent cold which then more therapeutic bleeding (insisted on by his doctors) ends up making worse. It is suspected that this treatment, carried out with unsterilised medical instruments, may have caused sepsis, and then he dies. 

Sometimes, looking back on historical medicine and treatment methods... I realise how lucky we are nowadays, to know better. Things like this also remind me that despite how much I’d like to go back in time to see history and stuff, it’s probably not a good idea. Not only because of this, but also the lack of plumbing. And hygiene. And sanitation. And wifi -- omg no internet, no thank you.

19. So, to end it all, Byron’s English friends are shocked to hear he’s died, and his Greek friends all mourn him as a hero. 

20. Now, to describe how Byron looks... according to Wiki, he was: “5 feet 8.5 inches (1.74 m), his weight fluctuating between 9.5 stone (133 lb; 60 kg) and 14 stone (200 lb; 89 kg). He was renowned for his personal beauty, which he enhanced by wearing curl-papers in his hair at night.” Ha ha ha, ha... 

Then he’s also famous for having Foot Issues, namely a deformity of his right foot. Whether he’s clubfooted, a consequence of infantile paralysis, or dysplasia -- what’s agreed is he had Foot Issues. The Foot gave him a limp, and “caused him lifelong psychological and physical misery, aggravated by painful and pointless "medical treatment" in his childhood and the nagging suspicion that with proper care it might have been cured.” At this point, in my head I went ‘awww, poor baby’, and felt sorry for him (I still do), but then I read on, and.

Byron was his usual Byron-like self about it, so I couldn't help but giggle.

Firstly, he nicknamed himself ‘le diable boiteux’ (French for "the limping devil", also the nickname given to Asmodeus by Alain-René Lesage in his 1707 novel of the same name). 

Secondly, although he often wore specially-made shoes in an attempt to hide The Foot, he refused to wear any type of brace that might improve The Limp. Byron, seriously, wear the brace. A Scottish novelist (John Galt) said he felt his oversensitivity to the "innocent fault in his foot was unmanly and excessive" because the limp was "not greatly conspicuous". 

[He first met Byron on a voyage to Sardinia and did not realise he had any deficiency for several days, and still could not tell at first if the lameness was a temporary injury or not but by the time he met Byron he was an adult and had worked to develop "a mode of walking across a room by which it was scarcely at all perceptible". The motion of the ship at sea may also have helped to create a favourable first impression and hide any deficiencies in his gait, but Galt's biography is also described as being "rather well-meant than well-written", so Galt may be guilty of minimising a defect that was actually still noticeable]

Byron. Oh Byron. I feel sorry that he was so self-conscious of his foot deformity, don’t get me wrong, but I can’t help but also giggle imagining him doing all this. It’s so dramatic. This boy. 

In short, simply from reading the Wiki article on Lord George Gordon Byron, I feel incredibly fond of, exasperated by, entertained by, and confused by this hugely influential, incredibly dramatic and complex historical figure.

I already love reading poems and quotes by him, but knowing more about him now... I am also inspired by him. Even from just a Wiki article, even from just reading this one source about his life at a questionable time of night -- I feel like I understand better why people have coined the term “Byronic hero” in honour of him. 

[The Byronic hero presents an idealised, but flawed character whose attributes include: great talent; great passion; a distaste for society and social institutions; a lack of respect for rank and privilege (although possessing both); being thwarted in love by social constraint or death; rebellion; exile; an unsavory secret past; arrogance; overconfidence or lack of foresight; and, ultimately, a self-destructive manner. These types of characters have since become ubiquitous in literature and politics.]

I see Byronic heroes all over the place. In all my fandoms, in all walks of life. From the classic Heathcliff to the likes of the Hunchback of Notre Dame (sobs), to The Phantom of the Opera (sobs), to Lestat from Interview with a Vampire, to Batman (LOLs), to fucking Edward Cullen from Twilight (gags).

The drama-llama lives on in all types of characters, in so many fictional worlds. As someone who lives to read and loves to write, I am completely unsurprised that stumbling across a Wiki page such as his has moved me so deeply, because in so many ways it was like reading a fanfic (albeit the driest, flattest fanfic I’ve ever read in my life). In so many ways I saw so many of my favourite characters written in his life, and by golly, it’s just fantastic to think that he actually lived in our world, isn't it? To think that and know that is both wonderful and strange. 

So, without anything left to add to this long, ridiculous post, I apologise for rambling on about a dead poet and contributing absolutely no new information to what is already known about him. I am aware all I’m doing is regurgitating old facts and basically oohing and ahhing over them, like an idiot. All I can say is I’m glad for Wiki, and Jesus Christ, I’ve got to start going to bed earlier than this. 

Auf wiedersehen. 

[secretsofthemasquerade]

What this all means? WoD prelude issues

Abuse will be mentioned

Disclaimer: I don’t want VtM to become a nest for gamer-gaters asshats, so let it be clear that I stand for feminism, positive representation and progressiveness. And further than that, I stand for meaningful, well written media. This is both beyond offensive, and badly written (and badly coded!).

Alright, now that you may (or may not) have read my spoiler free review of the WoD: Prelude vampire game (we eat blood all our friends are dead), this is the second part of this review. The one that really stirs shit, tackles what this all means, and talks about the problems surrounding the two authors. Good brew incoming!

There are a few issues that need mentioning; Zak’s reputation of being a dick (to say the least), white wolf saying they don’t give a shit, and one trans character in the game.

First, I must say I said what I needed to about Sarah (the second author of the Vampire gale) in a few reblogged discussions I had with her about it; you can read that here. She claims the “problematic trans character” is a reference to someone else, but as the anon in that ask pointed out, the name given to the character totally references someone else (and it’s not like Avery is a common first name, so the “coincidence” excuse is weak, to say the least). It’s probably a little bit of both tbh. White wolf stands behind their choice btw.

This is my random, worthless opinion on the trans character’s subject: I don’t think the trans community deserves to be treated like this, and I’m not going to police whether trans people can talk about their dicks (or lack thereof) or not. Sarah likes her characters bold and unapologetic, which is perfectly “none of my fucking business”, I just find that it gives too much of an excuse for people to actually ask trans people about their dicks (or not) which is a definite no-no when it comes to, you know, basic manners. Why encourage that? Most trans people do not want to talk about it to random strangers they’ve just met, so why have that be the main representation of trans people in the media? Sex workers who brag about their dicks and who are serial killers? I find it tasteless at best, dangerous (again, “hey, if this is what trans people are, i totally can ask about their dicks!” kind of shits) at worst. Not that sex workers who talk about their dicks are wrong in anyway, of course. Note that I have no problem with a character being trans, being a serial killer, or being a loud unapologetic bitch. I have a problem with what it may lead to, and how respectful of/to the community the character is. And it’s simply not written with the respect and the love the trans community deserves. The fact that Sarah herself is trans doesn’t make her a good candidate to write well-made (trans or not) characters. I’m all for more diversity in authors (cuz it’s still a bunch of white old dudes out there), but they still need to be good writers (or at least more decent than the shit that’s being published nowadays). Writer is a job. And this is were Zak and Sarah failed; they just didn’t work with basic decency, respect and research of the characters, and what they are, what they represent and what they mean to the community. The fact that White Wolf Publishing used the “but we have a X friend!” excuse only makes it more profoundly wrong. And you guys can’t even blame that on Europeanism (racism takes very different forms here than in the US, certain things are more blurred, and ethnicity is overall understood differently), even in France we consider the use of a token minority person to excuse controversial stuff to be just plain wrong (and god knows France can be very weird about the treatment of minorities). 

If you’re trans and knowledgeable of trans representation, please tell me off about this. It’s just my thoughts on the matter as someone who cares deeply about characters.

The other trans character, Morgan, exchanges like, four texts with you. So, this character’s existence gave nothing to my run. I need to replay the thing and see if other choices give us more interaction with this one, and I really have no problem with this one so far.

Now, the “unique aesthetic” that was brought to the game, I could find interesting modern artists on tumblr to draw for this game, and actually have their modern art be readable, as in, “really in accord with the game’s content (a quick sketch needs to be a quick sketch)”. I can also guess that it would come out far cheaper than whatever this guy took (I hear he sells his art pieces in the thousands? people, you’ve got too much money on your hands, give it to me instead).

The writing, however, I’m pretty sure (read absolutely certain) there are very knowledgeable wod fans out there who can decently hold a pen (half of the RPers I exchange with can come up both with a decent story and can write it out in a very.. literary and interesting way, and so without having to sort through the bs ramble that brings nothing, and without the “options” branches that lead to just a game over screen...).

Zak’s reputation of being a harasser and abuser doesn’t seem too far fetched from where I stand, especially since people who complained have said that White Wolf never contacted them back, even if they said they did. I can’t say deffo what he did or didn’t, but I can certainly assure you that the choice of White Wolf knowingly hiring the guy, then defending him, all while knowing all of this shit, and having one of their writers be one of the victims of the abuse, is not an innocent move from WW/Paradox.

We wanted fresh blood, fresh views, fresh takes, and they willingly hire a veteran known for beyond “problematic” behavior. And excusing all this shit because “but he’s an artist!” doesn’t cut it. Not from White Wolf. Not from a Scandinavian company. Not in the world we live in today. Not with the very talented people who are fans of the WoD and who can come up with something so much better, so much smoother, so much more respectful, and without all this negative publicity. This isn’t just some loud mouth rough corners guy (like I can admit I am!! let’s be honest I’m a harsh bitch lol), this is seriously.. wrong. It leaves a very bitter taste in my mouth, and tbh, Werewolf already has a reputation of being a game played by fascists, and LARPs are known hunting grounds for less-than-polite predators, why fucking continue this fucking shit? This isn’t what we want our hobby to be. This isn’t the kind of people I or anyone around me want to be associated with. Art is political in nature, but that doesn’t mean I am willing to accept the company owning the IP I love most hiring fucking extremist assholes. Everyone has a “problematic opinion” on something, honestly, that’s fine, I mean I get my share of anon hate for many of those, but can you guys straightforward tell me I’m a bad person doing evil and spreading evil into the gaming industry? (If I am tell me now so I can quit!)

TBH, I believe they hired Zak because he was a known “controversial figure”. To have free publicity. To pander to the GG community (EDIT: I failed here, I wanted to say “attract extremes”, Zak is not a gamergater at all). To get everyone angry about “the gay agenda”, “modern art” and more. They’ve succeeded. But it’ll blow up in their faces, and I really want us all to show them this is not acceptable.

What to do now? Be heard. Show your displeasing of such choices. Don’t let them have it their way with an IP you care about. They may own the rights, but ultimately, as Brucato (Mage RPG author), the games belong to us, the fans. Write to white wolf, boycott. Do not harass and insult, but tell them exactly what you think.

There are free visual novels out there, and cheaper princess makers who have more interesting outcomes, badges, achievements, easter eggs, all sorts of different endings if you fail/die, and all sorts of different failure paths that still let you play, and replay, and replay, without feeling frustrated, fucked over, and just plain trying to follow some incoherent druggie’s trail of thoughts.

Here’s a few things I recommend playing, to read how good characterization, art and horror can come around, as well as player agency and choices that mean you continue playing despite failures (linking steam, but gog works too for most of them). So here’s a few games you deffo wanna try out instead of these.

Long live the Queen

Actual “Princess Maker” games :)

Cupid (I can’t recommend @cupidvn enough, it’s  great free game, it has a few flaws considering it’s purely fanmade but overall, it’s very interesting and treats the subject with a good amount of respect)

This war of mine

Choice of vampire (free on web, available as a mobile app)

Vlad the Impaler A very awesome replayable story, you pick one of three characters who has one of two specializations mid game depending on your choices. Just. Get Vlad. It’s great.

I’d also mention an Actual Lone Wolf (by Dever!) video game/visual novel/cyoa. 

Heavy Rain (PS3) So many choices, and the game goes on regardless of what happens. The illusion of choice is so well made. Beyond Two Souls also does this fairly well, but the story is more linear 

The Last of Us (the MC is still a 40 something rough guy, but there’s more to it I promise! there’s no “choice” to be had, but the characterization is great)

And finally, I highly recommend watching like, all of Extra Credits videos about game making, characterization, illusion of choice and so on. They did a playlist. And other one about genres that might come in handy.

I’m very close to angrily make the text/choice/agency/multiple paths adventure we all need and deserve, and publish it for free... But I really don’t have the time, nor the funds, nor the skills, nor the legal knowledge to make it. So if someone wants to, know that I have a hot story that’s worth telling to initiate new players to the WoD :)))

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #76

“yeah, you’re a crazy bitch, but you fuck so good.”

do you ever think about what went wrong in your last relationship? we each made mistakes, and i feel more certain of this now that jason and i have talked. i, for one, gave up on life while still being alive. on jason's end, he, too, gave up on me instead of trying to rebuild me. do you know your best friend’s middle name? yes, colleen. she goes by her middle name, but her "real" name is elizabeth. you have to get a piercing, what do you get? vertical labret on my lip. would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler? a standard poodle. ever driven into the ghetto to buy drugs? no. mom denies it and got pissed once when i mentioned it, but we once lived in sharpsburg, and that was totally the ghetto. do you own a gun? as i'm mentally ill/have had suicidal tendencies, i legally can't. my mother even can't because i live with her. would you rather sleep with someone or alone? with someone. while it's less comfortable, it's comforting. are there any songs that remind you of falling snow? or any songs that remind you of winter time but are not necessarily about that? dude, i have noooo idea why, but for whatever reason, "dreamer" by ozzy osbourne definitely brings to mind winter for me personally. is there anything coming out soon (books, albums, movies, video games) that you're looking forward to? hmmm, i don't think so... but then again, i live under a rock and am not informed on what's coming out so- wAIT IS OUTLAST 2 OUT YET what is something you wish you had learned earlier that you know now? how would this have helped you if you'd known it then? i don't know if there's anything, honestly... i used to say i wish i'd known jason would leave me, but i guess i don't now. because i loved, beyond explanation. i loved with such a naive innocence, and i don't regret that. when you’re interested in someone, do you let them know? according to my history, i do. what was the last compliment you received? someone liked my hair. i got compliments on it non-stop at the hospital. do you have any siblings? are they older / younger? 
 including half-siblings, tiffany, misty, bobby, katie, and ashley are older. nicole is younger. have you ever thought about getting your lip pierced? it has been pierced before, and i plan on doing it again very soon. favorite shoes you have EVER owned? the finding nemo once i had as a kid were fly as FUCK allergic to? pollen and silver favorite fruit? strawberries who was your first prom date? jason where did you live the first time you moved out of your parent’s house? i lived with jason, amanda, and jacob. if you were to have sex right now, would you use a condom? in almost all cases, yes. the only situation where i wouldn't is if i was with jason at this very moment and he wanted to have sex, and he didn't have any. just apply the pull out method, and besides that, i shouldn't be ovulating right now, so i wouldn't get pregnant. do you think it’s bad to have sex at your age? no, i'm an adult. have you ever wanted to get drunk and take your mind off of everything? i sure have. how long do you think you will live? eh, probably early 80s, maybe even 70s... i'm not the healthiest person, mentally and physically. have you ever been stung by a bee? i have not. do you like the snow? very much so. how old are you? do you feel as old as you are? i am 21, but i certainly don't feel it. does the quality of a video, on youtube or a television, matter to you? at least very mildly, sure. it needs to be watchable at least. do you tend to listen to music that embraces your mood or does music dictate your mood? is it a little bit of both? i tend to embrace my mood with the music i pick. are there any books or films that have influenced your philosophy? if so, is there one you could name in particular? "johnny got his gun," i r8 8/8 what is the cutest animal? meerkat pups, oh my GOSH what seasons seems most fitting to your personality? in what ways and why? autumn, because everything is dying. :'D do you think you would be a good parent? i don't know, honestly... blue, black, or red pens; or another color? black do you like watching people play video games? yes, i do!! idk why, it's just entertaining to me. when was the last time you swam in a pool?  years ago what are your parents views on sex? err, in regards to what about it exactly? have you ever babysat before? yeah, for the neighbor. if your current boyfriend/crush suddenly moved away what would you do?  i'd be pretty devastated, honestly. if your best friend revealed she was a homosexual, what would you do?  well that'd be a problem, as she's married to a man. i'd be pretty concerned about what she'd do. have you ever dreamed about your wedding? i have. do you delete pictures of you and your exes off of facebook? nope. j and my pictures are still up there. ever plaigarised? no. i have too much respect as a writer. do you edit your profile pictures before posting them?  i do minor adjustments, of course. i was a digital photography student, we know aaall about the mandatory deception of editing. :P what's your middle name?  marie what's your wallpaper on your phone? lock screen is the bogeyman from "silent hill: downpour," but the artwork is from "anne's story." home screen is pyramid head from the white hunter comic. favorite tv commercial? the dirty mr. clean commercial mAKES ME SOB YA'LL SHOULDA SEEN ME THE OTHER DAY I WAS DONE what is your favorite type of cat?  hmmm. persians, sphinxes, ragdoll, etc... what religion were you raised in? are you still that religion, if you had one? catholicism, and no. i'm christian now. would you ever consider getting dreadlocks? nooooo. how many times is your cartilage pierced in your ears?  once. do you prefer to spend more time with your SO, family, or friends? why? in my history, my s.o. jason really just touched this part of my brain that just REALLY made me happy. if you see a homeless person asking for money, do you give them any? i'm not going to lie, no. i don't know that person, and WAY too many assholes are deceptive little shits. what will immediately disqualify a potential SO?  smoking, doing drugs, excessive drinking, abusive past, and i'm certain there are others i'm forgetting... i am honestly VERY picky. when was the last time you really panicked? when i overdosed a few days back. do you ever get eczema? nope. have you ever witnessed a serious physical fight? i have not. is there anyone you would do literally anything for?  honestly, yes. i'd kill for jason. it's very unhealthy and i wish the mentality would stop, but i honestly can't do much about it... do you enjoy corn on the cob?  i do. in your opinion, what's the ideal age to start having children? about mid-20s. what's the longest you've ever slept in one go? it HAD to be almost 12 hours. jason and i were up almost the entire night being horny whores and when i fell asleep, i was GONE. have you ever dated someone with an accent different than yours? no. does caffeine affect you, or not so much?  not very much at all. would you ever want to follow down the career path of your parents? no. but then again, they both dropped out of/didn't go to college, so... guess i'm not too far off. do you think “sleeve tattoos” are a good idea? *sexual moaning* if you have any tattoos, do you reckon you might regret them when you get older and have children? i sure won't. is there anything in particular that your parents argue about? what? just gonna say there's a reason they're divorced. do you act differently around the person you like? i mean, i'm happier. kissed someone you didn’t like?  on the cheek, never on the lips. ran a red light? no. experienced love at first sight?  nope. pointed a gun at someone?  no. had a gun pointed at you? no. dumped someone?  yep. lied to avoid a ticket? no. ridden in a helicopter? no. made your girlfriend/boyfriend cry? i woulda preferred you to rip my fucking heart out. eaten snake?  omg no. puked on amusement ride?  no. been in a band? nope. been in handcuffs? i've been in full-body shackles on one occasion. i was going from the mental hospital to the court. what is your favorite breakfast food? pancakes. who do you (romantically) love? my ex, jason. do you enjoy kissing?  sure, yeah. what about making out? i r8 8/8 m8 where are you most ticklish? MY FEET HOLY SHIT where do you want to get married? gothic-styled mansion or similar building pls do you plan on having both your parents at your wedding? yes. have you ever slow danced to a song you didn't know? no. if you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and why? south africa. i want to photograph the meerkats at the kalahari meerkat project. describe your perfect partner. his name's jason. would you prefer to be a vampire or a werewolf? vampire, i think. the werewolf transformation seems painful. most embarrassing moment?  borderline having a panic attack because i was like really close to having an orgasm for the first time and i didn't understand what was happening to my body lmao. jason was super cute and sweet about it though and helped me calm down. would you ever consider getting married?  i want to get married. if it were possible, what exotic animal would you keep as a pet? if it weren't so bad for them, i'd totally have a meerkat. what is your least favorite thing about your appearance?  my stomach. ew. have you ever had a bonfire on the beach?  no, but that sounds cool. do you listen to music while driving?  it has to be VERY quiet. or else i can't concentrate. have you ever received an autograph from a celebrity?  no. can you honestly say you’ve been drunk before? i have. is there a certain color of eyeshadow you prefer, if you wear eyeshadow? black as my soul. would you ever do something you didn't enjoy sexually just to please your partner? depends on what, really. like there are some situations where i'd absolutely draw the line, but here's an example: i don't like oral, but i guess i'd give it sometimes if it made him happy. when was the last time you watched south park?  probably not since j and i were together... i remember one occasion where we chilled in my room for hours watching it. are you italian? no. where’s the nearest game stop near you?  in rocky mount, by wal-mart. do you have any best friends that you only know online? i guess i still consider mini at least a very close friend, despite not talking much. i have other very close friends too, but not best, i guess. if you could, would you want to stay young forever? yes. being elderly is just, in general, inconvenient. not saying old people are, just the state of being old is. are you interested in anime? no more, no less than the usual person. hogwarts house: just took a quiz, and apparently i'm a mix of all? i very well coulda been off, 'cuz there was a lot of harry potter terminology that i don't know... what’s “out of bounds” for you during sex?  do. not. hit me aggressively. main thing. hickies - get ‘em or give ‘em?  i enjoy getting 'em, enjoy giving 'em. are you okay with rough sex?  hell yeah. i think i'd prefer soft and sensual more frequently, but i'm not totally opposed to just fucking. how big was the biggest dick you’ve ever seen? was it in a porn or in real life?  this survey sure took a sexual turn. but i've only ever seen one penis, so... how do you feel about daddy dom/little girl roleplaying?  nO JUST NO do you have any sexual regrets? i regret not going all the way with j. he was my first love, and he deserved to know me in every single way possible. have you had anal?  no, and i don't want it. do you like to spank/be spanked? i like being spanked, but not too hard. do you like teasing or would you rather get straight to the point? tEASE TEASE TEEEEEAAAAAASE are you able to have emotionless sex? fuck that. sex should be the epitome of physical displays of affection, imo. does penis size really matter?  honest to god, i don't care. it's not like a man can choose how "well-off" he is. describe an orgasm. oh wow. i don't actually think i've ever properly orgasmed, but i was extremely close once and totally panicked. it felt totally otherworldly, and i honestly felt like screaming, puking, and just exploding all at once??? i was so scared at first, but as i calmed down, shit was awesome. what’s the longest time you’ve had sex for? never had sex, but done sexual things for hours... like, all night. if you could change the person you lost your virginity to, would you? i would change the fact i didn't lose my virginity to jason. what’s something sexual that you thought you wouldn’t like, but ended up liking? anr/abf surprised the FUCK out of me. i honestly thought it'd be really awkward and uncomfortable, but it's honestly an extremely stimulating and motherly sensation okay i'll stop before this turns into a pornish thing. but basically it taught me ya can't totally judge some things 'til you try it. give your best sex advice, GO. uhhh. ever tried sucking on your partner's tongue while making out? turned my ex the fuck on, at least. would you say you’re good in bed?  have evidence i was good enough. do you like gagging on cock/having someone gag on your cock? why? i just choked on my fucking drink. but no, because i like air. when it comes to oral, are you gentle? do you use your hands too?  i. was so. timid giving oral. i was so scared i was going to hurt him. i don't think i've ever used my hands at the same time. okay, how do you feel about handjobs? since we were stuck with foreplay due to my abstinence, we relied on handjobs a lot. they're great. have you had any unwanted pain during sex? i've had pain while being fingered, sure. but i guess it wasn't entirely unwanted. has anyone drew blood from you during sex, whether it was by cutting, biting, or scratching? how did you feel about that? no, never. have you ever fucked someone who was sad? did it help them emotionally or make it worse?  i'm sure i have, and he's done it to me when i was sad plenty of times, and yes, it's honestly a great mood booster. are you more submissive or dominant? i'm definitely more submissive. who’s your ideal sexual partner?  jason was nothing short of perfect. are you accepting “applications” for a partner? lmao fuck that i don't do no "applications" for this kinda shit. who was your first kiss with? first person to kiss me was juan, but the first person i kissed who reciprocated my kiss was jason. how far have you gone sexually? depends on how you rank sexual things, idk...? did you shave your legs today? done with the sexual questions, eh? anyway, no. have you ever made out with someone in public at all? no. do you think masturbation is dirty? not necessarily dirty, just lustful. have you ever made out in a hot tub? *adds to bucket list* do you play with the other persons hair when you kiss? jason had long hair for a male, to his shoulders, and yeah, i liked playing with it. have you ever smoked pot? nope. do you sing in front of people? NOOOOO. ever lived in a trailer park? no. have you ever had dandruff? no, but i have a dry scalp. though both cause flaking, they're still different. what would people say about you at your funeral?  i was very quiet and thought too much. what lessons in life did you learn to hard way? your actions have consequences. would you ever give up your life to save another?  i'm not going to pretend to be a superhero. it depends on who it is. what is stopping you from living the life you want to live?  money, health, willpower... ever held a newborn animal? kittens, yes. how do you dress when you’re not at work? i don't have a job, so. but when i'm home anyway, i'm dressed for comfort, usually in my pajamas. if i'm going out, i will dress usually in something like yoga pants and a graphic tee. do you care overly about other people? the only person i'd say i care "overly" about is jason. what was your favorite pokemon as a child? charmander (: do you know what the heck the difference is between the statements “we’re just dating” and “we’re together”?   technically the same in my honest opinion, but at the same time, "we're dating" also sounds more casual. if a person is brought up speaking both spanish and english in equal amounts and equally fluently, which language do they think in?   *KA-BOOM* have you ever thought about getting your lip pierced?   it was pierced for many years, and i'm planning on getting it re-pierced very soon. last film you watched?   i just finished "finding dory" actually, now i'm watching "zootopia." when consuming a beverage that comes in a can, do you prefer to drink it directly from the can or do you pour it into a cup?   i like to drink it from the can.  tastes sliiightly different and is colder. what do you do to cure a headache?   sleep or take medicine. do you still possess any belongings from your childhood? do they hold some special significance?   absolutely.  i actually have two things i call "treasure boxes" where i hold certain, very special belongings.  nostalgia overdose. are any of your fingers or toes deformed? what about the nails?   no.  i would, however, call one of my nails unusual.  my right ring finger, its nail curves inward towards the base definitely more than it should.  it's so weird considering both my immediate sisters have it, too. when yawning, do you cover your mouth?   always in public, yes.  it just seems polite. as a kid, did you love playing on neopets?   neopets and webkinz were my SHIT.  i was more into webkinz, but neopets was amazing, too.  i loved the dragon one and the newer one that looked like a doggish thing with a stripe going down its body?  i think it started with an "x"? what is the background on your desktop? why’d you choose that?   on my own laptop, it's trico and the boy from "the last guardian" bc i love that game and its artwork.  on the laptop i've been using for like three months, it's a picture of my sister ashley and her baby aubree at the beach. are you comfortable with people going through your phone?   no, and i don't know why, actually...?  like i have NOTHING bad on there, it's just... weird? do you tend to daydream a lot? if so, about what?   i do, aaaaa lot.  aaand it's always about jason. e_e have any interesting conversations lately?   ohhh god.  not necessarily a convo, but lemme just make this known. chelsea: *creates fire w/ hairspray and lighter* *screams ensue* YOU ALMOST MADE ME COME HARDER THAN JASON EVER HAS then came the laughter and the stomachache from all the heaving what do you have pierced on you?   now?  only my ear lobes, and i'm livid about it.  i had to take my fucking piercings out at the hospital, and they closed up.  my ear lobes didn't tho, i guess 'cuz i've had them since childhood... but i am actually pissed. where do your grandparents live?   maternal: well, she technically lives in florida, but stays in new york with her son's family a load.  paternal: michigan. pencils; mechanical or traditional?   mechanical, by far.  eliminates the need to sharpen. what was the last zoo/aquarium you went to?   asheboro zoo or whatever it's called. what is the last big risk you took? did it pay off?   talking to jason face-to-face, absofuckinglutely.  that could've so easily ended in another suicide attempt.  but anyway, yes, it paid off. what's the closest you've come to death?   overdosing, i guess. what chocolate is your favorite?   milk who is your favorite blogger?  i don't really have one. what was the best thing you were given?  jason's love and attention, even if just for three and a half years of my life. have you ever cheated on your partner?  nope. are you over your past?  not in the slightest. did you try to change for a person?  ha.  he left too soon to give me a chance. e_e are you in a good or bad mood?   eh, i'm good for now. name someone you can’t live without.   no one.  after losing jason, well, i'm sure i can survive without anyone, ultimately. are you a crybaby?   10/10 do people praise you for your looks?   no. SEXIEST disney character that's not human?   okay sorrynotsorry but scar and steele are SEXY do you believe in the phrase “if it’s meant to be, it will be”?  ha!  no, sorry.  i refuse to believe jason and i weren't "meant to be." what do you put on hotdogs?  ketchup and mustard do you know how to play chess?   no. did you/are you going to go to prom?  i went to jason's senior and my senior.  man... i remember how shy he was when he asked me... it was so cute. :/ what’s the most physically painful thing you’ve ever experienced? having a pilonidal cyst opened and drained while still conscious and insufficiently drugged.  FUCK THAT. what’s the most emotionally/mentally painful thing you’ve ever experienced?   jason leaving me. have you ever legitimately saved a person’s life?   not to my knowledge. are you a very open or private person?   open online, private af irl what do you get complimented on the most?  my hair who was the last person you talked about sex with?  chelsea or colleen what was the last deep conversation you had about?   jason.  i was talking with chelsea. why do some girls become so dependent on their boyfriend/husband?   well, i, for one, was rather dependent on jason, and it was because i needed a pillar, and he was strong, but i guess i put too much weight on him... i had no fucking idea it was too much.  as well, it was because i am not an independent person.  i'm a follower and act like a dog on a leash towards the people i trust.  it's simply my desire to be a loyal companion.  i don't know how to change that. do you enjoy going to church?   i do, but not for TOO long. what do you have tattoos of/what do you want tattoos of?   oh god.  you asked for it.  as for tats i have, i have a semicolon butterfly on my right wrist, "perfectly flawed" written on my left, upper arm, and "ohana" written on my right collarbone.  as for what i want, i have about 100 ideas, but i'm going to only list the ones i am quite serious about.  my next tat is of "denialism" by da's tatchit, and it's going on my right upper arm as a half-sleeve.  here's the list: - "... and you ain't got his smile" written maybe under my left breast.  it's a harley quinn quote, and i want it as dedication to jason.  which no, i will not regret. - the magic sigil thing from "shadow of the colossus" somewhere - either a pyramid head, robbie the rabbit, or halo of the sun tat to pay tribute to "silent hill" - "he who knows pain is dangerous" written somewhere, which is a rammstein lyric, in either english or maybe german - spider sternum tattoo - a hydra coming towards the viewer with "from slave to master, i've become the hydra" (otep lyric) written in a semi-circle above it.  i honestly want this on my lower stomach, like, starting above my private, but i most likely will not do this.  still thinking of where to relocate it. - "i believe what doesn't kill you simply makes you stranger" written somewhere, a quote from the joker. - "how long is forever?" "sometimes, just one second" from "alice in the wonderland."  i want the quotes in speech bubbles vertical of each other. - a harley quinn-esque design with "rotten" written on it.  on my right asscheek.  yeah.  talk about slutty lmao. - a large viper on one of my hips. - three sketch-style arrows going down my left lower arm - "once upon a time, i ripped the wings from my spine, but when i hide inside your eyes, i still pretend that i can fly" (otep lyric) written along my spine I HAVE SO MUCH MORE.  but my phone's dead (i have more ideas on there) and i have even more saved to my dead computer... are most of the adults you know married or divorced?   divorced... it's so sad. :/ when was the last time you were mistaken for a mom?   at therapy some time ago.  mom was with me, and she was babysitting. what is your mom’s and dad’s favorite tv show?   mom's: "the big bang theory," probably.  dad, idk. have you ever suspected your mom or dad of having an affair?   nope do you think buying second hand clothes is gross?   certainly not. does it gross you out when your parents kiss?   well, they're divorced, sooo... does your dad swear?   yeah. do you sweat easily?   i sweat like an obese pig.  it's due to one of my medications. if your last kiss asked you on a date, what would you say?   "absolutely!" when you like someone, do you picture what your children will look like?   no. when was the last time you drank strawberry milk?   elementary school when i tried it for the first time.  absolutely fucking disgusting. do you own a pair of fingerless gloves?   yup.  i was big into that in high school. did you have a good driver’s ed teacher?   he was fine, but i am 100% certain that on one occasion, if i had listened to him, we would have died. if you have siblings, which one of you is going to be married first?   ashley's already married, i'll probably never find anyone, so i guess nicole's next. did you kiss the last person you really wanted to kiss?   like, do you mean did i kiss him the last time i wanted to kiss him?  if so, no.  he barely even let me hug him. when your last relationship ended, how long was it before you felt ready to think about being with someone else?   it's been over a year and i still don't feel entirely ready. do you think it’s wrong for someone to commit themselves to a long-term relationship at a young age? explain.   no, and there's no real need to explain...?  obviously, even young people are capable of sincere love? are you legal to drink?   yep. do you have any dirty pictures on your cellphone?   i do not. what do you want more than anything in this world?   jason. last time you felt physical pain?   earlier today.  my stomach was hurting. last time you felt emotional pain?   i'm clinically depressed.  i live with emotional pain. what are you listening to?   "american horror story" is on.  it's actually a ptsd trigger, so i'm trying to watch it again to like... edit the memory.  i'm doing it with chelsea so i won't be alone. do you like your handwriting?   i do. do you own any dresses? if so, what colors are they?   i do not.  i wish. when was the last time you went tanning?   never. have you ever been in a car accident?   quite a mild one.