#he's a promiscious man that one

[m3r1m4r5u333]

I read that bit about Ryan calling Eddie heterosexual 🤔 Yeah well, sorry if someone is disappointed by my non-reaction, I still ship buddie and see Eddie as a closeted queer man.

But Buck doesn't see Eddie as queer, and I think that's the point here: he did come out to another man, one he thinks is straight. So that's the mindset of that conversation.

Also, about Eddie's queerness. I think calling him heterosexual makes sense, that's his "safe place to hide."

I know this fandom is in love with the repressed, married, closeted gay man-trope, and expects Eddie to spring out of that box eventually.

I'm seeing another box, a newer, rarer one. There has been lots of bi-coding attached to Eddie, and I think the box I'm looking at has a bicycle sticking out of it.

It's the repressed, sensitive, non-promiscious romantic bi man-box... And beautiful to me, because it's not the same old tired trope we always get. (Btw yes, I may be wrong and do hope I won't end up "skating over a sequin" and getting hurt... But either way, that's the box I'm hoping to open when Christmas arrives. Writing my letter to Santa as I type.)

... Christmas, probably:

Edit. Lol, non-promiscious. The first head in the box arrived the same day I made this post.)

[chaoticbardlady99]

Floozy (Astarion x F! OC)

Chapter 1: Cat and Mouse

Synopsis: Imogen finally feels comfortable enough to go to the Flaming Fists to report Astarion after several regular clients of hers go missing. Imogen improvises to survive the Nautiloid in spite of being told she won't.

Content Warning: Violent imagery, sexual imagery, promiscious, mentions of sex work, the title is applicable to the story I promise, low self-esteem, homelessness, parental drug use, child neglect, eventual fake dating, Cazasnore makes an appearance, kidnapping

AO3

“Well, hello, Darling,” a man muses, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you around before.”

   Imogen slowly turns around and is met with semi-glowing red eyes, a gorgeous face, and an even more awe inspiring smile. She eyes him suspiciously and he looks taken aback. 

 “You must not be very observant then,” she says in a cold voice, “I work here four days a week.” 

  “Really? A woman as beautiful as yourself? Working in Sharess’ Caress?” the man says with feigned disbelief all over his face, “do your clients know they are lucky enough to be in the presence of a Goddess?” 

 He’s fucking with me- I just know it.

 “They did,” she states, “until you took all my regulars and did Gods only knows what with them.” 

     The mask he was wearing shatters- hard. The sheer panic on his face is enough for Imogen to know that her suspicions are correct- her regulars are no longer walking this earthly plane. She turns on her heel- leaving the beautiful man in a storm of terror. 

 She had been onto him for months now and his face alone is enough for her to tell the woman at the front that she will be back. If he’s murdering people, then he needs to be stopped. She needs money- she can’t have every regular she has die on her and now that he seems to have moved onto her, well…

  Imogen looks up and down the street for a Flaming Fist- the night sky is bright with moonlight and there are masses of people walking around. She let’s out a huff of frustration when she realizes it’s going to be significantly harder to find a Flaming Fist than she thought. 

   Pushing through the crowd and occasionally having some handsy man or woman grab at her in her skimpy outfit, Imogen finally finds a Flaming Fist guarding the gate into the Lower City. A sigh of relief leaves her body, but then someone is pulling her aggressively into an alleyway- if anyone notices, no one follows them. 

 “Pain in my fucking ass,” the man from earlier snarls before turning on you, “what do you think you’re doing?”

 “What do you think you’re doing?” she shoots back.

  The two are staring at each other with equal amounts of contempt and venom, but Imogen sees an excruciating amount of fear in his eyes as he peers down at her.

 “You need to come with me.”

 “Absolutely not,” she scoffs, “I know for a fact that you kill every person you take home- I’ve been watching you for months. I just needed a direct confession and your facial expression is more than eno-”

  He slams her up against the wall and Imogen gasps- whether out of fear or arousal, she can’t be entirely sure. His cologne fills her senses and he is positively magnetic. He smirks at her while leering back.

“Darling,” he says through gritted teeth, “I’m not the one who does the killing.”

 She searches his face for any signs of deception and is utterly surprised when she doesn’t find any. Imogen’s face softens, much to both of their surprises. She’s actually not that tough of a person, she had just practiced that speech so many times in the washroom that it was second nature. She is far more passive- the one men and women enjoy fucking as hard as they can because she’s been marketed as “being able to take it”. 

 She couldn’t, not really, but she needed the money to survive so she took it. 

  The fear in his eyes- it’s not because of her telling the Flaming Fists. He’s afraid of another entity entirely. Who, what, or why- she doesn’t know, but it would be remiss of her to not offer to help in any way she can. 

 “Is there anything I can do to help you?” she pleads, “we could go to the Flaming Fists together- you don’t have to-”

“No,” he hisses, “I can’t do that. You can help me by coming with me.”

 “I can’t do that.”

 “I know,” he says through a choked whisper. 

   His hands are suddenly around her neck and she’s struggling to breathe. She looks at him with pleading eyes and notices his own eyes are even brighter now.

 “It’s always such a shame when cattle won’t listen. Don’t you agree, Astarion?”

  A voice from further down the alleyway causes her to begin fighting back harder and she immediately recognizes the man- Cazador Szarr. For whatever reason, that doesn’t surprise her. He’s always been kind of off putting, weird, and sadistic when any of her clients invite her to attend a soiree with them (paid, of course). Everyone else is charmed by him, but Imogen knows better. 

 The man, Astarion nods his head, but his eyes are looking at her as if to communicate that he is sorry. That he did not want to have to do this to her and that she was just unlucky enough to have crossed his path tonight. 

 Tears begin to fall down her face and she focuses on Astarion as Cazador begins walking towards them. Her heart races and she feels all the hairs stand up along her neck and arms. He is going to kill her- she can see it in his eyes and she begins to sob harder as he strokes her cheek and forces her eyes to look into his. 

 He looks hungry. 

 She whimpers in fear and he smiles darkly- massive canines peeking out from underneath his lips. Imogen begins to realize there may be worse things than death. What if this man does what he did to Astarion to her? She doesn’t want to murder people.

 “Aren’t you a delicious little thing,” Cazador says, his hands trailing down the front of her chest, brushing one of her nipples before gripping her breast through the fabric, “I have a feeling we are going to have a lot of fun together.”

  Tears go rolling down her face even faster now. Cazador begins to slowly undress her by untying the back of her dress. Astarion’s hands begin to tighten again around her throat, her airway more closed now than it was before. She puts her hands on his wrists and pleads with him in her mind to fight whatever this is, don’t kill her- please. 

  Except the situation quickly gets worse. 

 A mind flayer comes up from behind Cazador- he barely catches the invasion in time and the man disappears into a cloud of red mist and Astarion drops her to the ground when the Mindflayer grabs him, another one coming out from the shadows towards Imogen. 

 She weakly tries to get up, but it’s no use- she is too weak and delirious to successfully get away and she’s forced to give in. Astarion is screaming and trying to attack the creature clinging onto him- the screaming stops abruptly and Astarion drops like a dead weight on the ground.

 Imogen can’t decide if she just has terrible luck or if she just needs to get the fuck out of Baldur’s Gate already. She doesn’t fight the Mindflayer like Astarion did, but suddenly, she’s floating off into space- the world no longer privy of her and her no longer privy to the world.

         *************************************************************************

 When she wakes up again- she’s in an entirely different place and the smell of Sulfur assaults her nose as her pod opens. Imogen gingerly jumps out and looks around- grateful when she sees something resembling a door. She fights the vomit that crawls up her throat when she sees that the door is made of some kind of flesh.

 Thankfully, it opens without her assistance and she steps inside with gentle footsteps, remaining along the edge of the room until she is certain that no one else is in there but the strange voice from the floor above. 

  The elevator system is actually pretty neat, but coming across a brain talking to her as a man looks up at her does actually make her begin coughing up bile and shaking. She gets up, scrambling to run down the path leading away from the grotesque sight.

 “NO! Please SAVE US!”

  “I’m sorry!” she yells back, “but I promise I would if I thought I could stomach it!” 

“PLEASE!!!!”

 The plea was desperate and it pulls at her heart strings. Imogen stops and begrudgingly trudges backwards- putting her fingers into the skull. 

   Gods, this is disgusting!

     One of her fingers accidentally slips into the brain and she has to suppress the gag threatening to leave her throat. She doesn’t want to alarm the poor thing.

 It pops out and walks around for a bit, before looking at her? Imogen isn’t really sure, but ‘Us’ decides to join her on this little adventure.

     The hot air and sulfur is all consuming- Imogen feels dizzy. This is all too much and she’s probably going to die. Whether it be by turning into a Mindflayer or being killed by someone else- she’s not sure if she has a preference anymore. She just wants the hell out of the Hells. 

  As if on cue, a sword is thrusted into her face and a creature from a race she has never seen in her life is staring at her. Imogen nearly falls backwards from trying to get away, but thankfully they reach a mutual understanding.

 “We need to kill the Imps,” she states as if that’s the easiest thing in the world, “then we will find a cure on the Material Plane.” 

  Imogen feels herself go as white as a sheet and the woman cocks her head at her.

 “What is it, istik?” 

  “I-I don’t know how to fight,” she admits.

  The woman blinks at her a few times before she begins to walk away.

 “Wait- don’t leave me here!”

 “You are of no use to me,” she spat, “unable to fight- Vlaakith preserve me. It will be a miracle if you survive any of this at all.” 

  Imogen swallows thickly and doesn’t argue with her- instead, she follows behind her and stays out of sight while she fights the imps. Us stays nearby, remaining her loyal, weird pet companion. 

  Imogen will let her do the heavy lifting and clear the path ahead. There has to be a way out and Imogen is determined to find it. She is not going to die here.

  After the woman climbs up the disgusting looking nets and disappears, Imogen walks over to one of the corpses that is wearing a robe. 

  Imogen looks down at her current outfit and then at the robe. She’s going to have to change. No one is going to take her seriously dressed like this and she needs at least something to attempt to defend herself with. 

  “I am so so sorry,” she says to the poor man she’s stripping, his eyes glassy with death, “I wouldn’t do this if I didn’t have to- I hope you can forgive me.” 

  The robe is far too large on her shorter frame and it’s rather loose. It sits awkwardly on the curve of her hips, breasts, and ass. She groans- this is going just sooooo well already. 

   She takes the dagger and cuts the robe to her knees and the arms until they are at her elbows. Sticking the dagger in her makeshift belt (fashioned out of her previous outfit). The next body she finds thankfully has a pair of boots that are her size so she discards her sandals and shoves her feet into the poor dead person’s shoes- once again apologizing profusely for messing with them in death. 

  The next climb is not nearly as disgusting now that her feet are covered and she is expecting the odd texture under her hands. Imogen finds that she’s actually a lot stronger than she realized- she’s not even breaking a sweat. Sex is apparently excellent exercise. 

  She’s met, once again, with a room decorated in gore, except this time, there is a woman screaming and yelling as she slams her hands against the glass. Imogen races over and the woman looks relieved.

 “Oh thank the Gods,” she breathes, “please help me- the other survivor, she left and she’s already working on taking down the ship.”

  Wonderful.

 “Do you know what they used to close you in in the first place?”

   Imogen can tell the woman is struggling to calm down enough to think clearly. 

 “Hey, look at me,” Imogen says softly, the woman looks at her on the verge of tears, “I’m not leaving you here to die alone, if you die, I die- breathe. Tell me what you remember.” 

Imogen goes in the direction the woman gestured to and begins searching through the pockets of the dead- there’s another person in here, but unfortunately- they are a Mindflayer now. That one woman must have wandered in here thinking this was the way to the Helm.  

  A stone-like object is warm and pulsing in her hand as if it’s come to life. This must be the key that is missing in the console. 

 She sprints back this time and holds up the rune as she runs over- the woman cheers in relief and Imogen quickly releases her from her prison. Imogen wants to know why she specifically felt like she had authority over the console to control it, but figuring out all of this nonsense is going to have to wait. 

 “Thank you,” she says, “you have no idea how grateful I am for you right now.”

  Imogen smiles, “no problem- I’m Imogen and this is Us.”

  The woman eyes the creature with uncertainty, but decides it’s not worth questioning. 

 “Shadowheart,” she says while walking back to the pod, grabbing something.

  Imogen decides she doesn’t care- as long as this woman is willing to help her get out of here and back to Baldur’s Gate so she can say goodbye to her home and move the hell away, she can do whatever she wants. 

  The ship lurches suddenly and both of them go flying across the room- being thrown all the way to the opening Imogen came from. Both parties scream in terror as they watch the ground get closer and closer. 

 The ship’s descent and gravity force Imogen’s grip to release. Shadowheart tries to grab her and their fingers merely brush. Imogen free falls- the ground coming closer and closer as she braces herself for her death. 

 Only it never comes- a woman stands in front of her with a smile before Imogen unceremoniously drops to the ground. Her battered body begs for sleep and she gives in- hoping no more tragedies will be brought upon her so she can finally rest.

[hypergamiss]

What do you think is the reason that these celebrity 10/10 girls are getting cheated on? Do you think that is just the culture at that level? The place they live (hollywood) just has more promiscious men? Maybe they have bad self-esteem? What are your thoughts on why this keeps happening to them?

I think it is a horrible combination of things. The culture is definitely one of them. Hollywood breeds men who grow up thinking that women are dispensable and the double standards are also ridiculous. Even if they have good intentions and plan to be faithful, they don’t face any consequences or humiliation when they cheat so it’s almost as if they’re encouraged to do it at that point. Bad self-esteem could also be a part of it, sometimes you can tell the cheating had nothing to do with the woman they’re with and they have internal issues that they never addressed. The reason for me pointing out that 10/10 celebrities get cheated on is because if loyalty depending on looks alone, they would be bulletproof but that’s just not true. You have to choose a husband wisely and be able to offer more than your looks alone as a woman. When you compare Hollywood to the east coast or the south in the U.S. (for example), you have individuals who earn much more than the male celebrities and they do not cheat despite them having access to beautiful women. Mostly because their communities are in favor of loyalty and would refuse to do business with them or associate with them if they were to cheat on their wives. Marriages need this type of structure around them to thrive because it gives them more reasons to be faithful than to cheat, like can you imagine a man cheating and losing his family and he loses all his network to make money and his friends shun him out completely. Then he has to watch another much respectable man raise his children for him. In Hollywood people act upset at first but then practically praise them for being players and some how create a narrative to sympathize with them like “they were lonely” or “going through a hard time.” News flash, we all get lonely and face hard times but that isn’t an excuse to be a shitty human, especially if children are involved. Look at what happened with Jay-Z he was solid for a minute with Beyoncé but he screwed it up and even though they are well off financially, they want to earn more money the easy way but the wealthy men don’t trust him anymore so he’s doing suspicious businesses that may not be ethical (he might be trafficking surrogates in India). And why is Beyonce trying to act relatable on TikTok???

[last-night-is-a-blur]

A Charmed prequel.

We start with Melinda Warren as a young woman. She tries to fight even without guidance from other witches and has to learn things on her own through trial and error.

Her mother is her only ally and confidant.

Later she meets a young girl who is a witch, that grew up in a coven and teaches her a lot of things.

Melinda also has a friend (lets call her Patience), who is mortal, and she occasionally helps Melinda fight demons, but doesn't know that Melinda is a witch. She just knows that Melinda has a knack for finding mysterious things, and has a strong urge to help people. She keeps on getting herself involved as well, out of desire to help, and concern for Melinda's safety.

Patience doesn't tell anyone about their supernatural adventures, since she is afraid people won't believe that they are fighting demons and warlocks, not allying themselves with them.

Eventually Patience finds out, and struggles to accept this, but can't bring herself to turn Melinda in, and eventually they reconcile.

Meanwhile Melinda befriends and starts falling for a mortal man. For various reason (including Melinda's fear of him finding out she is a witch, and not wanting to marry someone she would be lying to about a big part of herself, and his family not wanting him to marry a woman born out of wedlock). Eventually Melinda reveals the truth to him. He accepts her, after first being angry she lied to him or something.

They get married, have Prudence. He dies.

At some point Melinda ends up in Salem and starts dating Tate.

We see the start of the Phoenix assasin witches.

The atmosphere of the show is filled with paranoia and spookiness. Especially as the Salem witch trials begins.

After Melinda's death, there is a flashforward to when Prudence is older.

Prudence lives with a mortal woman who took her in.

She can slow down time. Her foster mom knows she has powers, and forbids her to use them. Knowing what happened to her mother, and growing up believing witches are evil, she fears her powers, and hates herself.

Still, when she sees someone in trouble she uses them. But after that instance people become suspicious of her and she has to run away.

She ends up in Wellfleet where she meets Mary Hallet, who teaches her that witches aren't evil and to accept her magic.

Prudence also meets a male witch and the fall in love. They dislike each other at first, since she finds him cocky and promiscious, but they eventually become friends and fall in love. They get together after some initial troubles. Not sure if they should have kids, or if that would be weird, since if the Halliwell line was descendent from another witch line besides the Warren line it might raise question of why that wasn't brought up in canon? Though it might explain why two of the 20's cousins had different powers than the ones Melinda passed down.

Prudence crosses paths with pirates, slave trades, pirate hunters, sea monsters and ghosts.

While Melinda's story is all about spooky forests, and paranoia, Prudence's story is more of a pirate ghost story. The Flying Dutchman and such.

[acrossthewavesoftime]

Because you, @pentecostwaite and @coquette2004 were asking, here is the murder mystery (which I believe I may have solved):

The setting is reminiscent of the song Little Musgrave (and all its titular variants); a young, handsome nobleman is found in a compromising situation in the bed of a lady by the latter's husband, prompting the husband to challenge him to a duel by sword, which ends in the young, handsome nobleman being mortally wounded.

Deviating from the well-known song (which would not have been familiar to people in 17th century Germany, anyway) however, the fate of the lady, who dies in Little Musgrave, being killed by her husband when he realises that she will never live happily again following the death of her lover, remains untold.

The story was recorded sometime in the 19th century, adding to my initial scepticism whether I would be able to find anything of interest about the alleged murder at all, seeing as the 19th century is infamous for never letting the historic truth get in the way of a good, romantic story.

Where things get interesting is that there are names and a court position pinned to the story, the husband and allegedly promiscious lady being said to be of the family whose manor house used to be on the site close to the church, which said family erected as a (very large) private chapel in the 17th century, shortly before the Musgrave-murder is said to have played out.

The alleged lover is said to be of another family with ties to the region, whose name may in so far be familiar to you, were I to mention it, as that there was a quite famous family member who was involved in the 20th July Plot of 1944.

Following the duel, the slain man's sword and spurs were kept in the chapel, and were said to still have been there in the 19th century.

Since the names and the court position were quite concrete, but the story of the murder sounds a bit incredible, I did some digging. A murder among fairly, well, notable, nobles would have been reported upon, reflected in broadsides, or left some traces in the legal system; none of my searches turned anything up, though.

So I broadened my scope a little and looked into the family of the husband and wife. It turned out that some other member of the family, who lived at a different location, held the very important court position (and that not at the time I was interested in) and that the only male member of the family in question living at the aforementioned manor house within the time frame that was most likely for the Musgrave-murder to have happened in, died unmarried and childless in his late 60s.

I had sourced a book on the family's genealogy, so I, not one to give up quite so easily, searched for this man's siblings, perhaps the story about the murder referred to a brother, or cousin; but what I found was a sister.

A sister, who had, like her brother, died unmarried following the death of her fiancé in one of the great, big battles of the 17th century. And the fiancé's surname matched up with that of the victim in the Musgrave-murder story!

Here is what I believe must have happened: not dissimilar to a game of telephone across generations and centuries, the original events, namely the young woman waiting for her fiancé to return from the war, and choosing not to marry anybody else following his death in battle, was turned into a much racier, gorier variant. The young man still dies, but this time, it's not a big battle, it's a duel, and he is not some presumably chaste and honourable fiancé, but a secret lover.

The sister, in mourning for her fiancé, had a flag with his name made to be displayed in the family chapel to remember him by (which however does not survive, for all I know), so I am willing to give some credence to the idea that someone may have obtained his spurs and sword for her as a memento, which she very well may have placed with the flag in the family chapel in order to have a special place dedicated to his memory (his grave is located just far enough away that regular visits would presumably not have been possible for her), where she could also pray for his soul and seek solace in her faith.

As the spurs and sword allegedly were still in the chapel (now general village church) in the 19th century, I asked the lady from the local historic society overseeing the opening hours of the church for interested visitors whether she might know anything about these items, but alas, she had never heard of the story before, and has no knowledge of any such items being in possession of the church.

So, one mystery has been solved, but another has opened up!

Stuff that happened to me in the last two weeks, in no particular order:

Confused a lady from a local historical society by asking her about an early modern murder mystery that allegedly took place near the church she had opened for visitors that day but which she, to my surprise, had never heard about.

Have been offered, by different people, and independently from each other, a tour of two non-publically accessible historic buildings and a church crypt (please knock on wood I would love for this to work out)

Have been gifted a c. 110-130 year-old fan

My mother's remark that I would have made a fine lady-in-waiting back in the day, as I am, or so it was explained to me, in possession of all the necessary qualities and qualifications for the position.

[ellaintrigue]

TIME AND PLACE (And, yes, the joke is a bit misogynistic but we're talking about boomers here lol.)

I saw this cartoon the other day and chuckled. This was my mom and grandmother's favorite joke actually! Mom told my grandmother, "why is being a hooker better than being a drug dealer? Because you can wash your crack and use it again!" The two women cackled away.

But they wouldn't have told this joke in church or in front of strangers. It's okay to have a dirty mind and free speech but you must use respect when exercising both.

I am by no means trying to promote the criminal element but as I've said, I date them. And I also meet a lot of non-criminal varieties who sleep with a lot of women, which aren't really my type. So why is it that most of these men are way more respectful to me than the good old country boys who work hard and live respectable lives??

I feel it is a matter of socialization. I am an uneducated rural woman but I have self-awareness and empathy. These things don't get taught when you grow up on a farm and are only exposed to your family and a handful of locals.

As a result, nearly every time I talk to a rural blue collar man, I hear the worst ignorance. I am not talking about them directly cussing me out or insulting me but they think it's okay to comment on big tits or make sexual jokes to women they barely know. And I know it's because they grew up sheltered and still are.

I dated one in 2021 and he said he went to a party, a woman farted, and he started yelling to everyone, "THIS BITCH FARTED." I said, why did you repeatedly call her a bitch? He was from the Rockies, WV. He said he thought bitch was just another name for woman. He actually listened to me and realized it wasn't respectful and corrected himself.

Earlier this year I met a man from a tiny rural Virginia town bordering WV. Very rough around the edges, uneducated, bad teeth. He was polite and kind but then a few days in he randomly told me he had a big penis. Okay? See, I'm not a prude, but I don't want any man I don't know coming at me talking about sex or his genitals. And he wasn't trying to be disrespectful, he was just plain ignorant. I saw his father's profile on Facebook and it was a bunch of right wing posts and pictures of busty women with captions like, "look at her floatation devices, she won't drown!"

I let it slide and he didn't say anything else sexual until the next day when he said, "your tripod is home from work ha ha." I blocked him. I don't care if he had a big dick, that's not how you respectfully address a woman you are trying to get to know. And he didn't know any better, that's just how his father had raised him.

As for the felons and manwhores? My theory is that they have been around enough people to learn social skills, even if it wasn't always good people. For instance prison is the worst place in the world but it seems some of these men come out of it knowing how they DON'T want to be treated and they apply that to how they treat others. Meanwhile if they had just stayed home on the farm all their lives with mom and pop and the farmhands they would still think it was acceptable to talk about bitches and tits in front of everyone. And the promiscious men? They've learned what women like because you don't get in a woman's pants by calling her a bitch and randomly leering at her breasts in public.

That's just my theory. Isolation is never good. I'm an introvert myself but in life you really have to get out, be around people, and be in social situations so you know how to act right. Because being around a small handful of people with no social skills is just going to turn you into one of them

I'd rather deal with a guy with no father who has lived on the streets and experienced life rather than a guy with a father who has been exposed to nothing but stacking hay and being taught lewd comments towards women.

[sighdra]

Week 14- Jennifer's Body

I recently rewatched Jennifer's Body with my boyrfriend to get a referesher, so I could have a better idea on what to write about for this entry. I found it so funny, because he got scared while watching it. I think he thought Jennifer was going to eat him later that night. It did bring up the discussion on the genre of the film. Personally, I didn't feel like it was a horror film. My boyfriend on the other hand, thought it was a scary movie, and classified it as a horror film. It got me wondering, what about it made me think that it wasn't vs. what did my boyfriend see that made him think it was. Which is why this time, I will start off with the connection to the reading first before talking about the film overall. Linda Williams, as stated before, defines genre with having excess of something. When we look at horror, Williams classifies it as a genre with an excess of blood and women (with women being mainly the one's that are bleeding). Horror is also inherently seen as geared toward a male audience. Willams connects horror as a genre men feel pleasure in watching, due to the mix of violence, porn-like features, and women often enduring both of those things (often at the same time). Connecting that to Jennifer's Body, I see women and blood, which falls under horror. However, I think that it wasn't horror because of who was experiencing the bleeding and lust. Throughout the film, Jennifer lures/ seduces men into a secluded area. She then proceeds to eat them, drinking their blood. She turns into this scary monster when she attacks them, but remains youthful and "god-like" when she's "full." It made me think as well from a male perspective like my boyfriends, he seemed fearful that a girl was eating and attacking men. He classified it as horror. However, if a man/male was to see a woman experiencing those things, I'm not sure they would feel the same type of fear. Fruit for thought.

Connecting to my next point in the reading, there is a connection with Jennifer's Body to the Madonna/whore complex. Jennifer, the monster/ "bad woman," must be killed punished. Since she is seen as promiscious, she is considered a "bad person," not only because she eats boys but because she is sexually active. Therefore she should be punished. Needy, on the other hand, is the "good woman." Loyal to her friend and her boyfriend, Chip. While Needy plays the good girl, who doesn't engage in sexual activity often or as "kinky" as Jennifer, she must get possessed. In theory, this both cancels them out. However Williams reminds us just because as women viewers we see the character having "sexual freedom" and connecting it to the desires of women, does not cover the fact that it is representative of the violence against women. Which plays into the fact why Jennifer is seen as a "scary" monster (when she's hungry) and not a beautiful one all the time, like Edward from Twilight. With the intent of the audience being women, Jennifer's Body can be appealing because of the "trauma" displayed in it. However like Williams said, while it's appealing because of the trauma, the truama is glorified. It's made in a way that makes us forget the reality of trauma/ glorify it. It's important that we recognize it and not let it cover up the violence against women.

I love the movie. I think there can be a lot said in regarding female friendships that are often bonded because of trauma. I can also talk about how Jennifer was sexually assualted in a sense and then band doing it were indifferent. I could even talk about the fact that Jennifer and Needy were bisexual and probably had underlying feelings for each other. I do want to make note of Madonna/ whore complex from earlier. While the film showcases Jennifer as this promiscious girl, when following the theory, Jennifer is "punished" for being a "whore." This is when she decides to go with the band and is sacrificed. However since she wasn't a virign, she was "punished." Causing her to get her powers and having to eat men in order to feel okay. That is why in the case of Needy (the "good girl") of the story, she only get's possessed. She doesn't need to feed on humans to survive. I also think Jennifer only went to boys due to her own trauma. She feels a sense of power or "healing" from eating boys, because she was assautled and almost killed because of boys. The dynamic between Needy and Jennifer are very complex. I can say the same about girl friendships I've had, especially with a best friend I had who I considered my "soulmate." Since they are both such pivot times in their lives, becoming intimate with partners, trying to enjoy life, learning how to be "socially relevant." I do think that they both try and impress each other, they each give each other some time of validation. Needy gives Jennifer a sense of superiority, that she makes Jennifer feel cool and an "it" girl. This is due to the fact that Needy is a more "dorky." Jennifer on the other hand, makes Needy feel needed (like her name). Needy also feels cool socially, because someone as gorgeous as Jennifer is her best friend. However, I see how their own feelings for each other get in the way of things. Jennifer gets jealous of Chip and Colin, so she goes after them to get Needy's attention. Jennifer could even do that to try and get Needy to be there for her after her assualt, but doesn't know how to express she needs help in a healthy way. Needy also allows herself to be walked all over, because she can be considered "infatuated" with Jennifer. Overall it touches upon the subject of intimate girl friendships and their break ups well. As someone who faced that in college, it was very hard. I'm sure Jennifer and Needy grieved their friendship after they both realized they were going in different directions in life. However, because they had been friends for so long and have been trauma bonded, it was so much harder to let go off their friendship. It meant so much to both of them that when Needy stabbed Jennifer through their friendship necklace, she died and lost her powers. We also see that Needy also thought of their friendship as something close to the heart, when she kills Low Shoulder in their hotel room. Like we have talked many times before, when women get behind the camera and insert their own narrative, it can be an enchanting thing to see. While Jennifer's Body can be casted aside because it looks like the focus is Jennifer's body, we dismiss the opportunity to relate and feel seen as a woman. Horror can overshadow the trauma's of women because of women fillmmakers "debt" owed to make it into the genre. But I think that when given the chance and opportunity, whether it's expressed in a small way, women's narrative and selves should still be considered.

[popculturebuffet]

Pride Month: Queer Duck or I Pray For Gay Death but Gay Death Won’t Come (Comission for WeirdKev27)

Hello all you happy people and welcome back to Pride Month! Today is another comission for friend of the blog @weirdkev27. I do really appricate kev: he’s the reason i’m at all fincially solvant and i cherish that. That being said...

... he also made that he really is a dear.. but seriously also fuck him because I had to sit through Queer Duck. 

Queer Duck is a flash cartoon from 2000, made by Mike Reiss, who you may remember as the former showrunner for the Simpsons during seasons 3 and 4, two of my faviorite seasons as well as the co creator of the utterly awesome show “The Critic”, which sadly only lasted for two seasons and was cancelled after one season on two diffrent networks and not allowed to move on to another network. I feel this clusterfuck of treatments was the large reason why Reiss had gotten tired of doing big network shows that took hundereds of people and decided to go into web animation. The results were this, a web series of the critic I don’t like to talk about, and Hard Drinkin Lincoln.. which only makes this review harder because I wish i’d watched THAT instead. At least I could’ve watched Teddy Roosevelt give Lincoln an intervention... .I assume that was an episode if otherwise why make this. 

As for why he choose to make a show based around a sterotypically gay duck..

I only found about two things on the series:Wikipedia saying Reiss wanted to make sure to cast a gay man to play queer Duck on the dvd bonus features of the movie. 

Yes there was a movie.. and yes.. that’s next week. The other was a short interview with him and al jean where Reiss is quoted saying:

“It’s the thing I’m most excited about in my entire life,” he says. “I don’t like how gay people are treated in comedy. Gay people are nothing besides their gayness. So I created a cartoon that was pro-gay and featured gay animals.”

I could honestly tell in the text: Queer Duck, the series at least, comes off as a man WANTING to represent gay people and wanting to mock the assholes mocking them.. but who clearly knows so little about gay people the best he can come up with are stereotypes and various jokes that amount to...

I’ll go more into it in a moment though provided you join me under the cut as I examine queer duck and go into every damn episode of this thing. 

Content warning: this series contained jokes about Homophobia, Sucicide, Gay Conversion “Therapy”,  HIV/AIDS, and the KKK so if any of that is a trigger for you best skip this one for your health as I need to talk about the episodes talking abotu those topics. 

General Queer Duck Stuff:

Okay so before we get into the shorts themselves, a bit about some general tropes of Queer Duck and it’s main cast. 

Queer Duck stars .. Queer Duck

A gay duck voiced by Jim J Bullock, who I regonized but couldn’t figure out WHY. Then I looked up his resume on Wikipedia.. and found this was Mr. Munroe from Ned’s Declassified! I loved that guy. Not my faviorite teacher that would be Principal Wright played by the late, great Meiscah Taylor of Designing Women fame. But I still loved Mr. Munroe and he was just a warm, nice guy to be around and Jim is a great actor. 

Queer Duck is a terrible character. There’s no getting around it. His only traits are “Being sterotpyically gay”, “promiscious despite his boyfriend being RIGHT THERE half the time, which also falls under sterotypically gay but comes up enougH” and “kind of an asshole”. They TRY to set him up as this karmic bugs bunny type trickster but instead of pranking the villiians or doing clever schtick he just sorta... repeats that he’s gay, throws gay in front of a word, talks about having sex wtih men, talks about barbra streisand, does things that people sterytlpically associate with gay men, simulates sex acts... he is entirely one dimensional and that one dimension is...

And you may be thinking “Jake why are you mocking a character from a 3 minute a piece web series for depth?” But the thing is... the characters on the other show Reiss worked on had a lot of layers comedically and sometimes dramatically: Taking it back to the critic again Jay Sherman is pretentious, has a lot of jokes about his weight (that as a chubby guy myself I don’t take offense to as their taken to ludcrious degrees that mostly work), and is egotsticial.. but he’s also vunerable, lonely and thus likeable. He has integrity. I get you can’t pack the MOST complex character in there, but there’s nothing abotu Queer Duck to root for or laugh at or with. He’s JUST a gay stertoype. he has one joke and it’s not funny. Reiss wanted to make gay characters that wreen’t just about being gay... and then made a SERIES ABOUT A CHARACTER WHOSE JUST GAY. 

The rest of the cast are also pretty one note: Openly Gator, voiced by Kevin Micheal Richardson because this series got a LOT of talented people in, is Queer Duck’s nervous partner who at most gets annoyed at his boyfriends crap or is openly clingy. Though the former part is justified because as I said Queer Duck openly lusts after or hits on people in front of his boyfriend and while they have a threesome early on it’s clear Openly Gator isn’t comfortable with things outside that. But i’ts played for laughs because god hates me. 

Then we have.... Bi-Polar Bear. BI-POLAR BEAR. 

For those of you just joining this blog for this review in paticular, welcome. I’m Bisexual. it’s in my profile, it’s something i’m proud of and I came out publicly last year. I’m also a fan of the tick which also had a character named Bi Polar Bear so this joke isn’t even fresh. 

That 7 second joke is funnier and more relatable than every insuffrable second Bi-Polar Bear is on screen. Bi Polar Bear by the way is NOT bipolar or Bisexual, and reiss mentions bisexuals a total of twice in this insufferable series. He is just annoying. He’s a leather bar dressed bear who talks like Paul Lynde, a comedian from the 60′s and 70′s who was gay. His voice is also the basis for Roger from american dad.  Bi-Polar bear says terrible jokes and then laughs. He’s voiced by an utterly wasted Billy West... in the sense his talent was wasted, though I really woudln’t be suprised or blame him if Billy Boy got really hammered for this. He isn’t the worst part of this series but that’s only because i’ts own humor is so inusfferable but we’ll get to that. 

Finally we have the BEST part of the series Oscar Wildecat. GET IT BECAUSE HE’S BASED ON OSCAR WILDE. But seroiusly he’s voiced by Maurice LaMarche who did a lot of great work on the Critic, is a voice acting legend and is great here. Oscar mostly makes gay jokes like the rest of the cast but is the only one with a genuinely funny and intresting running gag: he hats his mom to the ponit he wants to kill her. Which wouldn’t be as funny if they didn’t play with it: having him delightdly decide to come out ot his mom because it might give her a heart attack, having him spend SEVERAL HOUR ranting about mother to his therapist and calling into a call in show the res tof the cast is running, with all of them realizing it’s him instantly and not getting they shoudln’t identify him when he’s asking to kill his mother. It’s not much but at least it’s an actually funny gimmick and so over the top it negates the horror of it. 

There is one more recurring character, Dr. Laura who the show mostly says is homphobic and uses as a villian without much context. I thought this was just lazy writing but it turns out Dr. Laura is a REAL person and really homphobic.. so yeah I don’t mind them making her into a rambling asshole who tries to kill our heroes only to constantly be one upped by them. The jokes with her aren’t very funny but at least their attacking someone who GENUINELY deserves it you know?

So yeah that’s.. that’s oru cast and running gags fo rthe most part. There’s more.. but their introduced as we go and since I can’t put this off any longer let’s take a look at the episodes: 

THE FRIGGIN EPISODES:

There are 20 of these things, so while this is going to suck hard it’ll at least be a good way to try out reviewing all the episodes of a show in short form so I can review entire seasons easier in the future. 

These episodes were “aired” on Icebox.com, a flash animation site at the time that didn’t have much that looked great and whose other flagship show was Mr. Wong.. about an sterotypically chinese bucktoothed butler. 

Yeah not touchin that with a ten foot pole. The shorts would later move to Showtime to air alongside Queer as Folk because the execs figured HEY BOTH THESE THINGS ARE GAY LET’S DO THAT and because for some reason the shorts were popular. Do not ask me. Even for the 2000′s this is pretty bad but I can’t put it off forever so let’s go. 

I’m Coming Out: Queer Duck comes out to his parents who aren’t happy about it and his mom kills herself over it roasting herself in the oven. Also his mom is voiced by George’s Mom from Seinfield, who like everyone else here is not given a lot to work with but god bless em they try. But yeah back to the suicide, a phrase I never thought i’d have to say. Yeah this.. just dosen’t work. It’s way too dark a subject matter with not enoguh goofieness or over the top ness or ANYTHING to make it actually funny. The roast duck sucidie joke on it’s own would be funny.. but the added context of her doing it because her son is Gay.. isn’t. We also get a running gag of Queer Duck ripping off Daffy’s early schtick before solemly saying Gay Pride. 

There is a good joke early on when Queer Duck mentions his bitch of a boss.. and it pans over ot show a female dog. It’s a goofy joke but I loves it. 

Fiddler on the Roofies: Honestly I thought this episode would be way worse simply by virtue of the title but thankfully there is no date rape. Gee sure is a quality series that makes me worry their going to do a rape joke. But their not... this episode. It’s still not great though as Queer Duck’s brother randomly drops off QD’s nephew. Queer Duck’s brother only shows up here and thinks his brother is straight for some reason while his newphew, voiced by the wonderful Tress MacNeille. There is a good bit where Openly Gator can’t stop saying things around the kid, and while Queer Duck tries to show his nephew a movie , his nephew instead finds a Pokemon Themed Porn and pops it in. Having actually seen some because one of my best friends is weird, yeah no. Just no.  Also HA HA HE’S SHOWING A MINOR PORNOGRAPHY AND THE KID LIKES IT. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Christ 18 to go. 

Oh Christ: From showing children porn to GAY CONVERSION THERAPY. 

Yeah I just.. yeah. Futurama and South Park would both do this way better much later, with South Park somehow making one of the darkest, most vile most dispicable things in exstiance funny and the latter still making some jokes while also showing off how bad a thing these camps existance were. So again you can find comedy in a dark subject matter.. they instead just have a horse kidnapping queer duck then knocking him out when he does something gay for about two minutes. Also he kidnapped him.. I know the police probably don’t care about gay people but it was still a kidnapping. God this show. 

Queer Doc: Dr. Laura debuts and Queer Duck trolls her over the radio.. leading to her hunting him down with a rifle. 

What could’ve been a funny and cathartic Looney Tunes style game of duck and bigot instead ends with Laura looking into a glory hole and getting a dick in her eye. 

Look I am really trying here.. but this show is just so soul crushingly unfunny that it’s hard to make jokes even at it’s expense. 

B.S., I Love You: Queer Duck and the Queer Duck Crew wait in line for Barbra Streisand tickets, but don’t get any so Queer Duck instead tries stalking her and ends up in prison but is fine with it because gay sex. Because of COURSE this series made a prison rape joke. Because of COURSE this series thinks it’s funny. BECAUSE OF COURSE IT DOES. I’m.. i’m usually not this frustrated with a series but fucking hell. 

The Gayest Place on Earth: The Queer Duck Crew go to a gay themed amusment park. The it’s a small world (It’s a gay world) parody is pretty funny btu the rest is eh. Also their version of mickey forces their version of Donald to Blow him. 

Gym Neighbors: Queer Duck is honest when Openly Gator, great name by the way I do genuinely mean it, asks if his ask looks fat and OG ends up crying in the bathroom for 6 hours. Wow a joke both about how emotinal gay men are AND comparing them to women by using the outdated and sexist does this make me look fat joke. Mike you wrote Round Springfield. HOW is this series this trite. . You gave us dr cheeks. 

So they end up at the Gym where Queer Duck drools over and makes innuednos at a far more buff guy.. while his boyfriend tries to buff up to be attractive to him. 

Yeah this is one of two episodes that made Queer Duck wholly unlikeable. And this series has the continuity of a wet napkin but stil it dosen’t make him any MORE likeable. It also ends on Openly Gator getting his face messed up over this and then ending up crying in the bathroom. 

Queer as Fowl: This.. is an actually GOOD episode. Yes really. I know I was shocked too. But instead of using shock humor Mike uses what he is truly great at: good comedic timing: Queer Duck is at a funeral for his friend HIV Possum.. and while that in itsel fis a sterotype and kinda stupid the rest isn’t. I also do like another character introduced her KY Jellyfish... not the last time that pun would be made either but eh i’ll give it a pass. It works here because for the first and I think ONLY time Queer Duck has an actual character, wanting a party instead of a dour funeral for his friend after having so many gay funerals, and turning into a disco. The ending is also melacholy, with Queer sadly staring at a photo of hi mhanging iwth HIV Possum and admitting he’ll miss the guy. AIDS death aside.. this is a very good episode and is part of WHY the rest of this series frustrates me so much. Mike clearly is capable of making an emotional or intresting bit of animation in two minutes and a funny one too.. but instead just falls back on gay sterotypes and shock humor. had the guy just stuck to his strengths and MADE the character gay but also an actual character more like he is here the series would’ve been something special instead of ruining my day. 

Wedding Bell Blues:

Yeah this is the other episode that took me from being annoyed by Queer Duck to hating him. Here the QDC are on a plane coming home when Dr.Laura shows up as a gremlin on the wing. Openly Gator asks Queer Duck To marry him, and Queer Duck ONLY agrees because their about to die and then tries to back out of it with “Well we can’t get married because the world won’t let us” when they land because he wants to keep humping other men. Dude.. just.. asks Openly Gator for an open relationshpi or fucking break up with him like a mature adult you selfish ass! So they end up going to Vermont where it was legal at the time and is now but it’s also now legal everywhere, his mom makes a joke about wanting to die (Oh she’s also alive again), and Queer Duck spends the entire vows coming up with exceptions so he can cheat on his husband to be and then marrys him anyway. It just makes Queer Duck so throughly loathsome I don’t see HOW they thought this was a good idea, not to mention saying “Well gay’s don’t REALLY want to get married seee they just want sexxxxxx”. There’s nothing wrong with having multiple partners but as i’ve made clear you have to TELL your partner you want that. And if they don’t and your just not satisfied being with one person sexually the rest of your life, then fine, i’ts okay to break up. But don’t fucking lie to them. And I know, a lot of this stuff, especailly poly relationships haven’t been public but even the basic of “I can’t marry you because I don’t want to sleep with just you” shoudl’ve gotten into the writers heads. It’s okay to have sitcom shenangians, it’s one of my faviorite things, but you have to apply logic and empathy to it or else you get shit like this. 

Klu Klux Klan and Ollie: I don’t get this title and I don’t care that I don’t. The KKK come to attack Queer Duck and he decides to fuck with them.. metaphorically and tries to sneak in iwth them, then kisses their leader so they both get shot and ends up in heaven which is full of gay people. I feel the ending is clever but there just isn’t anything all that funny. Then again it also didn’t hack off a piece of my soul to sit through so i’ll call it even. 

The Gay Road to Morocco: A parody of the old road movie from Hope and Crosby road to Morcco, with LaMarche breaking out his voices for both for a cameo. It’s mostly an excuse for a musical number which isn’t half bad. it’s not more than “We’re going ot have gay sex in morocco” but at least it has a good tune and is clever with the sex jokes for once. It DOES however have all the morcoccan characters as muscual men wearing turbans and holding swords so it does add RACIAL stertoyping to the series gay sterotyping. I have nothing to add to that so I’ll jus tend on this note: the title is lazy. Seriously call it Gay To Rococko. One of the series smaller issues is that it simply dose’nt get it has no network censors to deall with and use that well the way shows long after it woul in the time of streaming.

Quack Doc: The Queer Duck Crew go to the pscyholgists office. Once again, Oscar Wildcat is the only thing of value really: there’s weak jokes about Bi-Polar bear being on hollywood squares and Queer Ducks first words being i’m gay and Openly Gator getting Xanax. Again it’s just forgetable but the series did at least get less horrifying as it went. 

Oscars Wild: The second best episode of the series, mostly because it focuses on celebrity parody and much like The Critic not only is good at it but is good at making the joke funny even if you don’t get the refrence. For instance they refrence the fact Bjork wore a weird swan dress once by having her wear a dresss made out of Bette Davis, jokes about Joan Rivers, Queer Duck responding to the rehtorical question “Who’d you have to blow to get us tickets to the oscars” with rupert everet and the climax which has Queer Duck and friends falling asleep alongside Jack Nichelson and waking up to an empty theater they decide to trash together. It’s not amazing stuff, but it’s pretty funny and something Reiss should’ve considered doing more of instead of limp gay jokes and offensive sterotypes. 

A Gay Outing: This title blows but the episode is okay. Queer Duck takes his nephew and his nephew’s to idendtical friends out camping. The setup for this is also great “I wouldn’t of agreed to that unless I was high on ecstacy.. wait when did you ask”: “Tuesday” “Oh.. well then let’s go”. It shows Bullock had genuine cfomedic timing.. just not a lot to work with normally. The episode is really just an excuse for a song as the boys find Queer Duck’s copy of Out magazine and tries to cover for himself by singing a song explaning various terms in the magazine with blatant lies. It’s a fun number and while thigns like bi curious and stuff are things he SHOULD explain and shoudln’t be ashamed of, other things like watersports fit the theme fine. And the ending with one of them asking “Is your uncle gay” and the nephew repsonding with “well duh” makesi t VERY clear they didn’t buy it. 

Radio Head: Another meh one with a good Oscar Wildcat joke, the radio one I mentioned earlier. Otherwise they just take over Dr. Laura’s show and melt her like the wicked witch of the rest, freeing some gay munchkins. It’s whatever

Tales From the City Mourge: The couch gag is clever here as normally i’ts queer duck saying some innuendo but here it cuts his head off .. then he says it as it’s the halloween episode. Also Bi Polar bear wants an anal probe afte rsome aliens mistakenly abudct him to mate with a woman. 

Homo for the Hollidays: Queer Duck and Openly Gator have christmas with his family which has swapped his brother for a lesbian sister who his parents are actively in denial about. We get jokes about Queer Duck stuffing a turkey, and are VERY lucky he didn’t just fuck it and he uses a wish bone to get rid of his parents.. who we  never see again. 

Look I love Estelle Harris but I hate these characters and don’t want anotheR episode of “His parents hate that he’s gay and are hostile to his partner THAT’S FUNNY RIGHT” ... ANNND looking at the movie their in it. God dammit. Why can’t one of them ever STAY gone. 

Bi Polar Bear and the Glorious Hole: It’s a Bi Polar Bear episode...

Yeah. Bout as good as you’d think. He gets his head stuck in the hole leading into Oscar Wilde’s house and everyone decides “Well he’s presenting his butt this must mean consent” and rapes him.

Yeah just.. yeeah. He apparently enjoys it and i’ts not TREATED as rape because 2000′s cartoon that thinks men can’t get raped (THEY CAN), but he can’t really consent so yeah... this episode can get a nailgun to the head and I wish this series would be over already but I have two more of these things to go. 

Santa Claus is Coming Out: They sing a song where the joke is just “Santa Claus is Gay” and we find out he’s bi at the end and they imply all bis are promiscious. Did.. did you expect anything more from this series at this point? Did you really? DId you expect them to get Bi People right when they can’t even get gay right? I didn’t, I was shocked one even turne dup let alone it being santa. I do want a work with a bi santa now. 

Point withdrawn. 

Mardi Foi Gras: FREE FINALLY FREEEEEE.. it’s jokes about getting beads at mardi gras and voodoo hexing dr. laura. it’s another nothing episode. THANK GOD. 

Final Thoughts:

This series is bad. Even by the comedy standards at the time it’s bad: while I get expecting a white man to write a gay man well is a lot, it has been done and had been done for years before this: Pied Piper came out in dc comics before this, he’s a great character. The episode Homer’s Enemy of the simpsons exists and John Water’s character is fucking awesome and that episode was funny while also utterly mocking homophobia and show ing how inerently bad is. It even had better camp gay jokes via the absurdity that is the gay steel mill:

I went into this series hoping for the best but preparing for the worst.. and really didn’t prepare well  enough. The second half of the series is for the MOST part better aside from the Pooh Parody that turns into a rape train, but is’ stil just not GOOD. The limits of  the format aren’t even the problem. The characters are just one note and mostly rely on “LOOK HOW GAY WE ARE JOKES” say what you will abotu Will and Grace, please do it’s also pretty sterotypical, but at least Will and Jack are actual characters. At least they have histories and pasts and wants and needs outside of wanting to sleep with dudes. It’s not much but it illustrates just how souless and half assed this series is. I’m not asking Mike Reiss to know everything abotu being gay in 2000, but I expectd him to at least if nothing else TALK to his lead actor, ask about his experinces, actually let Jim flesh out the character the same way he clearly let John Lovitz do the same with Jay Sherman. But he didn’t and the results and my utter EXAUSTION and disgust speak for themselves. If you liked this review please conside rjoining my patreon for exclusives LINK IS RIGHT HERE. I need to lie down. Oy. with the poodles already. 

[normanbased]

putting mine under the cut , TL;DR - He's gay

The only person who can ever speak for Tony's sexuality is Tony himself. With that in mind, though, I'm strongly of the opinion that Tony was a gay man who was/is a victim of conversion therapy. I don't agree with using the term "bisexual" for survivors of CT and I also don't consider anyone forced through it to be "cured." I get kind of heated when this discussion crops up, purely because there are people who believe he was "cured" of homosexuality. I think it's not only a gross dismission of his sexuality, but an inherent advocation of conversion therapy as something that actually works -- which it isn't. Conversion therapy hinges on guilt, shame, and self-harm. Tony's life was already plagued from a young age by guilt after the death of his father. He struggled with self-esteem and confidence as a young adult and well into his Hollywood career. Self-hatred is something he battled with. When that aspect of his life was preyed upon during conversion therapy, I can't imagine the trauma that would stem from that. I mean, for God's sake, they went as far as coaxing this belief out of him that his homosexuality stemmed from his childhood abuse - an utterly disgusting example of the manipulation he ultimately crumbled under. If we're to believe some of the biographical observations of his life during and after conversion therapy - he was at one point sexually assaulted by a woman (by the instructions of his "therapist") to try and ease him into sex with women. He married Berry mere days after being released from conversion therapy as a sort of final nail in the coffin of the entire sordid ritual. Having multiple kids to complete that nuclear family? To fit that perfect image of a straight man that he has been guilted for the better part of three years (intently, but if we're being real, his entire fucking life) to become? Of course he did it. Did he love Berry and his kids? Undeniably he did. But then we also have to consider the fact that he was also undeniably continuing to have sexual relationships with men. He was known for cruising, Andy Warhol wrote in his diaries about how often Tony called on Chris Makos during visits. Tony was not successfully "cured" of his homosexuality, if anything, it had become so deeply repressed inside of him that his libido exploded, and he became so promiscious that everyone in the local gay community seems to have been aware of it. And that's not even getting into the circumstances of his death. Considering Berry and his children tested negative, and unless Tony was shooting substances that never showed up on his blood tests - he was still actively having sex with men long after he married Berry. I think my conclusive thoughts are that, yeah, Tony is a gay man. He was also a victim of conversion therapy that - while it exacerbated his guilt to such a degree that he chose to conform - did nothing to change his sexuality on a fundamental level.

hey, tony fans…i have a question :0

Do yall think that Tony Perkins was fully gay, or do yall think that he was bisexual?

me and a friend have differing opinions about it😳

@0zzysaurus @davidrebooted @iluvyoumaude @perfectlullabies @jerek @ghostparty1 @pagodazz , and anyone that i missed/has an opinion

[emofairyprincessofarkansas]

Since I'm not currently writing (taking a break, see my other post), I thought I'd share some fic ideas I had and ended up not writing.

1. Pioneer - Dean Winchester/OC/Gabriel

OC was Sam and Dean's adopted sister. She's in love in Dean, but goes missing after Dean's 'death'. Along the way, she meets Gabriel and falls in love with him. It was meant to be multiple books spanning multiple seasons.

2. Madison Worthington-Hummel - OC / OC

Madison is the adopted sister of Kurt Hummel (are you sensing a theme in these stories?). She's very insecure about herself and has a temper. Her parents died in a place crash when she was younger, so the Hummels took her in. She has an older brother that refused to take care of her, so she resents him for it. She started off with one love interest, which turned into a love triangle, and then finally she ended up with the other love interest (but stayed friends with the first one).

3. Double Trouble - Fred Weasley/OC, George Weasley/OC

This story was about two friends named Claire Sites and Annie Duchess. They represented me (Claire) and my (former) best friend (Annie). We'd been using this alias' since the days of Quizilla. They met the Weasley twins on the first train ride to Hogwarts. Claire was promiscious and everyone called her the Gryffin-whore, even though she only ever slept with Fred. Fred and Claire had been together since at least their 3rd year. Annie and George were another story. They were still navigating their relationship. Annie was meant to fall pregnant with George's baby before they graduation, but we never got that far in the story.

4. Falling for a Vampire - Oliver Wood/OC

So this was a vampire AU and a blatant ripoff of Twilight. I was obsessed and thought it would be funny to basically make fun of it.

5. Once Upon a Stormy October Night - Harry Potter/OC

Anastasia Black-Lupin is the daughter of Sirius Black and was at the Potter's the night they were killed. Remus Lupin was entrusted to care and raise Anya while Sirius was in Azkaban. She always knew that Harry was her godbrother, but she was also close with her cousin Draco. She was sorted in Gryffindor and eventually went on to be Snape's assistant. It was supposed to span years 1-7 and into Deathly Hallows. I still have the excerpts, so maybe it'll be finished one day.

6. July Lullaby - Draco Malfoy/OC

There wasn't just one Potter child, there were two. The night Voldemort tried to kill Harry, he took Mackenzie and trusted her to his right-hand man Severus Snape, hoping to use the second Potter child as a weapon one day. He renamed her Rosalie and kept her a secret. Only Lucius Malfoy knew who Rosalie truly was. Rosalie and Draco grew up best friends and slowly became more. There were lots of twists and turns and I nearly finished this fic.

7. Every Girl Like Me - BBC Sherlock Holmes/OC

Olivia Lestrade is Lestrade's niece. She and Sherlock met and hit it off immediately. She's the only one not to be offended by how he talks or acts. Sherlock would never say it out loud, but Olivia is his soulmate. She just gets him.

8. Caged Birds Don't Sing

Lirilla is the second daughter of Celeborn and Galadriel. She's best friends with Legolas Greenleaf. She runs away from Lothlorien when her parents start talking about marriage, to her best friend of all people. She meets Aragorn and eventually joins the Fellowship of the Ring. She and Legolas have to navigate their relationship, while trying to get the Hobbits to Mordor.

9. I have several Twilight fanfictions that never panned out, but this post is long enough.

I hope you've enjoyed this little dive into my history of writing fanfiction and some of my abandoned ideas. I would happily answer any questions you have!

[parabellum-rpg-archive]

Congratulations, Jay! You’ve been accepted to play Shiloh Sinclair. Please make your page and send it in within 24 hours.

Admin note: me: wow jay can’t get anymore perfect jay: hold my beer

PS, that Pinterest board was spot on -Admin J

IC INFORMATION —

CHARACTER DESIRED

Shiloh Sinclair.

DESCRIBE THE CHARACTER IN YOUR OWN WORDS

drugs tw, death tw.

Shiloh Sinclair is a mess. He wants to please his dad while also fighting his vices. There’s that saying once an addict, always an addict and that definitely applies to him. Shiloh has conflict in his head everyday on whether or not to give into those vices or be a true soldier for his father.

He became such a party boy in the first place to forget how much of a fuck up he is in his own eyes. No one has ever directly told him that but he knew at that point. Drowning his sorrows in Jack Daniels and white snow seemed like the best option for him at the time.

He doesn’t have much self control and never has. If someone gets him angry, it takes everything in him not to just beat the crap out of the person right then and there. He’s extremely impulsive, and is always looking for the next high now that he’s not getting high all of the time. The fact that Elijah’s his roommate only adds to his demise. Like he literally would probably be dead by now if it wasn’t for wanting to please his father. There’s basically just an internal struggle between wanting to giving into his sins and wanting to make Morgan proud. If he can’t figure out a balance, one will probably end up being the death of him.

WRITING SAMPLE

tw: ODing, drugs.

“I dunno what I just sniffed but it’s fucking hype!” He exclaimed. Shiloh felt like Clark Kent himself right now. When he was on drugs, he usually didn’t make much sense. His drug of choice depended on what he was doing. Molly was when he was partying, coke when he felt in the mood to be promiscious and LSD when he just felt like being fucking out of it and having a good time.

Next, he’d begin to drink whatever liquor he could get his hands on. Thank God he had Sinclair genes or else this lifestyle would’ve caught up with him and he probably would’ve wound up dead somewhere.

Oh, well.

When he was crossfaded, he didn’t feel like a fuck up: Shiloh felt like the life of the party. He had positive attention on him instead of negative. He felt powerful, almost like his father, someone he knew he’d never be like. The red head wasn’t perfect like him and the more he thought about that, the more he wanted to drink and forget that one obvious fact.

——

He felt a struggle just to open his eyes, the way that they felt closed shut and the fact that he knew shit went down. He was expecting his parents to be looking up at him with disappointment in their eyes. Shiloh’s throat felt scratchy, and he put his hand out as if they knew he needed water. Finally, he groggily opened his eyes which revealed his mother sitting by his bed side. Why was she here and why was he not immediately getting yelled at? It thoroughly confused him for the moment.

It was almost like he forgot how to speak. His mouth opened but no words were able to form. Whether it was from shock of his mother being there or shock that he survived such a bad OD, he wasn’t sure.

The funny thing was, he had no intentions of returning to the states. He thought his parents would eventually just forget they had a younger son and that’d be the end of it.

Finally, after minutes of staring at his mother, he began to speak, “I’m sorry, mommy. I’m sorry.”

That had to have been the first time he called her by that name in about ten years. But right now he needed his mom and she seemed more than happy to oblige. He wasn’t sure what would’ve happened if he began to get a lecture, he would probably begin to bawl over the fact that he once again fucked up. Maybe he wasn’t the man of fucking steel.

[orioncarnell]

"Six months. So, for me, quite a while." Some simply did better with groups. Ember had been one of them, judging based on the brief time he had known her. Orion though- he doubted that without the raids, he'd still be here, regardless of all the benefits that staying in Redwood brought him. Her next words made him pause. Blink at her, a little dumbfounded. "Isaac... is your father?" Orion knew that the other raider was flirtatious, and could even imagine that he was promiscious (though he didn't want to imagine that), but a child? Admittedly, Isaac was not too open about his past, and neither was Orion, so it likely had simply never come up. "I didn't know he had children." He hesitated for a moment. "We work together. He's... a good man. Not the worst father to have, I suppose." She didn't even need to say it before Orion knew. He could see it in the way her expression changed, that something had happened. Still, hearing it confirmed from her... He let out a soft sigh, deciding not to prod at what she had to do. "I... I'm sorry. She was a good person. She didn't deserve it." He was not good with such things, saying the right thing, but he doubted that there really was a right thing to say, with what happened. "I know I didn't know her well, but I think she would be happy that you made it here, if she could see you."

"I'll be honest, me neither." He never stayed long anywhere, after all. Usually for a month at most, until it was more convenient to just move on. That was what he had done last time, too, when he had first met her. The odds that they'd meet again after all that time were slim, incredibly so. It would have been more likely for one of them to have died. Not that he wasn't glad about meeting her again. She was one of the few faces tfrom before here that'd look at him friendly. "Your father? He's here?" Orion looked at her a little surprised before scrutinizing her face a little, as if he were trying to find any familial relation to someone he knew. Admittedly, he didn't know too many people here, mostly interacting with his fellow raiders and the council, so it was likely he didn't even know her father. "What about your mother? Isabella? Did she come with you?" He raised his gaze a little to meet hers again. If she was here, he hadn't seen her around at least. He usually didn't try to think about the people he met while out there, because what was the point? Still, Ember and her mother were one of the few sometimes thought back on, hoping that they'd made it. "Are you still with that group you used to travel with?"

[scxrlettedrexms]

oh, wow, is that carlson young? Never mind, it’s just susana ross, the 23/1019-year-old bisexual vampire queen. I did hear that she is promiscious & clever but also really jealous & hot-headed. In the great war, she is on the avery side. I guess we’ll have to wait and see. 

brief info & background.

name — susana vincent ross

species  — queen vampire

nicknames — ana, susy 

age, dob — 23 / july 20th - cancer

personality — creative, spontaneous, loving, emotional, protective, moody, pessimistic, clingy, overemotional, suspicious, naggy, promiscuous, clever, jealous and hot-headed

appearance —  small slim build. susana dresses in a range of over the top outfits, from cascading ball gowns all the way to a popping pantsuit. she lives off of drama and doesn’t shy away from it when she dresses. throughout the years she has made a lot of money and she flaunts it with expensive and out-there outfits. she’s rarely ever seen in anything twice. she keeps her hair loosely curled and is usually seen in a full face of makeup. 

brief backstory

When Susana was human she held a high-class position as a local French man’s daughter. She had been going through the courting process when she finally met him. A local upperclassman had come to court her hand and Susana fell for him hard. He was beautiful in ways that Susana had never seen before and she quickly decided he would be the one that she would marry. Their courtship was brief but passionate and the two were due to be wed within a few months of meeting. Right before their wedding day her home was attacked. Her lover stole her away into her chambers to profess his undying love to her. That she and he would be in love to the end of time and he had the answer. 

A blood disease he called it, and he warned of the pain but the pay off would be great, life eternal with each other. She agreed and in his arms, he drained her of all of her blood and fed her his own blood to begin the process. She remembers this night vividly as the pain and experiencing death was something Susana would never forget. The couple then ran away that early morning and began their long life travel together. Throughout history, the two were together and Susana couldn’t have imagined a life better. She was forever beautiful with a man who adored her unconditionally. 

All good things must come to an end, even for vampires. Her mate had been murdered while the two were out hunting in the streets of New Orleans. He died in her arms and she wailed and wailed for two months. Mourning his dead for as long as the pain would sit in her long still heart. Years passed and she moved through the motions of being immortal. Susanna instead filled her life with an endless amount of lovers in the hopes of her heart one day feeling full again. 

When she stumbled upon Catskill she found a home within the Ross clan. That was where she met her king, Valentine. It was his status and power that she longed for more than him truthfully. So she spent a long time courting him until he agreed to marry her. After she had the power it was the rumors of an heir that caught her attention. To have an heir would be to finally have someone who loved her unconditionally. She longs deeply for a child and hopes to one day have it if it's with her king or someone else she does not care. 

[believe-that-you-can-my-friend]

A huge thank you!

I just wanted to thank you all wonderful people for the amount of love you showed my latest story about Serpent!Jughead and GoodGirl!Betty! Seriously, you guys, I’ve never ever expected such praising compliments and lovely words! I wasn’t sure about this particular story, I felt like I wasn’t doing a good job while writing it and then every time I was rereading it I thought that it was awful, and I was deleting and writing and deleting again and generally I thought the final result would be very mediocre. So all of you showering me with your love and utterly appraising comments makes me so beyond emotional and happy, you can’t even imagine! Thank you so so so so so much to everyone that liked, reblogged or just read my story; if I managed to make you forget the hiatus for just a second and indulge on those beautiful Bughead feels then that makes me the happiest gal on earth! Love you all! ❤️❤️❤️

@dreaming-of-the-lost, @angeloaktree, @thats-what-makes-you-you, @cheryllclayton, @chatterboxcurlygirl, @bettyluvsjuggie, @cinnamonandpapercuts, @thekatreads, @freaky-blondey-geeky You were all asking for a part 2 and, yes, darlings, there’s gonna be a part 2 and a part 3. I’m making it a three part story! Thank you all for reading and I hope you like the next two parts just as much! 

@bettysponytaiil Thank you so much, love! It means the world that you enjoyed the story!

@jeemyjamz So so happy that my words made you feel that way!! Thank you for reading, dear! 

@queenofepicnessus-blog Wow, thank you so much!!! Really excited that you liked the story this much!!

@maria12345md Thank you so much! Glad you liked it!

@juggydunes There’s gonna be more!! Definately around the same amount of pages long as the first part cause I just can’t help myself! Thank you for reading and sorry for that awful cockblock!

@myotpsaremypluto Thank you so much for you lovely words!! I didn’t know how this AU will be received and I was scared that maybe Jug and Betty would feel OOC but you guys all loved it and I’m so beyond happy for this. I just pictured Jug a tad more smug and confident if he was raised completely on the Southside and I just love Betty’s badass fighter personality so I amplified that. I really enjoyed playing in that universe and there’s more to come, dear! I’m making this a three part story that I hope you’ll all enjoy!

@teensyflowur Happy that I contributed to the improvement of your life, hahaha! Thank you much for reading!

@changminn Oh, dear, I should be the one smothering you with thanks! Your amazing words put a smile on my face! Thank you so much and don’t worry, there’s gonna be more!!

@birdlovesafish You are making me blush scarlet! Thank you so very much, honey!! I’m beyond happy that you enjoyed the story!

@jugandbettsdetectiveagency My dearest Anna, I always repeat myself but you truly are an ultimate sweetheart and I will never get tired of saying so! Your always complimentary words about my stories leave me the happiest girl on the planet and so damn honored coming from somebody with such incredible talent with words like you. Seriously, I should maybe buy you a gift and sent it to you, a simple thank you is just not enough at this point! I love you, you are amazing, and I hope my stories will continue bringing you beautiful Bughead feels and joy!

@carpebrina Wow back at your comment! Thank you so much for your words! And yes, there’s gonna be more, another two parts more!!

@allybastian So so happy that you liked the story!! And thank you very much!!

 @wordsonpages1 Darling, thank you so damn much!!! I’m so excited that you liked the little universe I created!!! And there’s gonna be more, don’t worry about that!!!

@jandjsalmon I’m such a sucker for Serpent Juggie as well, love - no, scratch that, I’m a slut for Serpent Juggie, that’s more like it lol! And compliments about my stories coming from you are always some of the most rewarding! Thank you so much, love, I love you back!

@timmyhatesit “... and I am so so so so happy that you literally wrote a 17k worded fic that has probably changed my life. YOU'RE AMAZING, OKAY?” No, YOU are amazing, dear, you don’t even know how much! I feel so honored about such a compliment, I literally don’t know how to respond because a thank you is just so plain! I’m very happy that you like my take on Jug and Betty, with him being more smug and cocky but still intimitated around Betty and the protector of the people he loves despite his more tempered character and with her being a badass feminist and a little more promiscious but never losing her pastel, sweet self. I wrote her as a modern young woman that’s not afraid to raise her voice and stand up for her rights and her own self without relying on any man to protect her like a fragile doll and I’m honestly so in love with her character (cause let’s face it Riverdale’s Betty is pretty much on the same wavelength as mine) and I’m so so so excited that you and other people loved her character just as much. Chuck is a mega asshole and he’ll continue to be because he is a fuckboy and nothing more and Reggie, my sweet boy, he is just tactless and a huge jock that doesn’t mind his tongue but deep down he is such a giant teddy bear. :p They’ll both have plenty appearances in the next two parts, cause yes, I’m making this idea a three part fic! Hope you got excited just as much as I did! And once again thank you for reading and for leaving me your amazing compliments, darling!

@goddess-of-everything-else You’re welcome, dear!! I’m very happy that you enjoyed the story at the end!!

@gershwinn​ I’m so excited that you all seemed to like what I did with the characters and the changes in their personalities! I had so much fun doing so! Thanks for reading!!!

@-els​ Wow, dear, such incredibly praising words!!! Thank you so very much!! Hearing such things about my writing is most rewarding feeling in the world!

@lostinafictionaluniverse​ Riya, my love, you redden me speechless once again with your wonderful feedback! I’m so so so happy that I could pass across the amount of sexual tension I was picturing in my mind those two would have and had you on the edge of your seat at the almost-kissing scenes. Seriously, your love and praise blows my mind each time! A million thank yous for your lovely words, you are so incredibly sweet! And there’s gonna be two more parts of the story; I hope they are of your liking too! @mkhamkhay Thank you so very much!! So happy that you’re enjoying my stories!!

@daredevil-karen-and-matt​ Serpent Jughead is always hot, I really can’t help myself either. I’m so glad that your first introduction to Bughead fanfiction was good! Thank you so much for your compliments!

@maldito-sentimentalismo​ Oh, love, I’m incredibly grateful, thank you so so so much!! Seriously, your words just warmed my heart, I feel deeply honored! And I appreciate you saying that you’d wait forever for my fics but I promise I’ll start updating sooner now that I have the time!

@leaalda​ Hahaha, I’m sorry for making the heat unbearable for you! Guess I should warn people to turn on a fan or something before reading!!! Thanks for reading and I’m so glad you enjoyed the story!!!!

(Tumblr doesn’t let me tag some people so if you left a reply but don’t see your name in this post, I’m so sorry, I’m deeply grateful for you too and I thank each and every one of you from the bottom of my Bughead dedicated heart!)

[fanfictionlive]

[Senstive subject about Rape, trigger warning!] How to write a rape survivor character who is promiscious to reclaim her control over her body

So, as the title says. My fanfic is a CYOA where I give the readers polls to decide which way characters are gonna go after something big happens (among other things), and they voted for a rape survivor, who was already promiscious before the rape, to jump headfirst into things like threesomes, orgies, and the like to reclaim her sexuality and self-agency.

I struggle with writing this. Every book I've read on rape victims talks about isolation, panic attacks, PTSD (which my character also has, but she's a pragmatic and logical creature and can handle those quite well without completely falling apart). But there's hardly anything about promiscuity.

What I struggle with most is that I find myself falling into the trap of writing your standard escapism sex-scenes, where everything is rainbows and unicorns and bliss. Which is not what I intend to write. I intend to convey that no-one tells you that, when you bare everything down to the barest essentials, sex as an act is physically the same whether consensual or non-consensual. Let me elaborate: no matter how gentle your lover is, or how much he reassures you, the physical act of penetration is still penetration. There's no magic that makes it special or different from penetration by, say, a friend with benefits as opposed to your lover.

This has irked me a lot in literature and fiction for a long time now, because no-one tells you that it's your mind that has to do the work to make things different. You have conquer your own mind, your own body, in order to become yourself again and to give yourself to someone you trust.

​

I'm just looking for some feedback, I guess.

​

The original scene had her just diving into the sex with enthusiasm, shoving everything about her rape to a deep, dark corner of her mind. She reaches an orgasm, ponders a bit about sex with women (she's bi, got raped by a man, and this scene is her first experience that goes beyond kissing a woman) and freaks a little about how easy it was for her to have sex so soon after getting raped, wondering if this means she might've asked for it after all (as the gossip says) subconsciously somehow, or if there's something wrong with her since she wasn't repulsed at all during this consensual sex deed.

​

Somehow, the first draft feels detached and non-personal, as if I'm telling a story about someone else, someone who isn't my main character. It's like she either wasn't raped at all, or just triggers an alter-ego side of herself. A new version of herself, as it were.

​

Another idea was:

​

My character will have an anxiety attack in lead to the act and pull back to sit and watch, while being comforted by someone else. So she's exposed to consensual, safe and mutual beneficial sex, without participating herself.

​

Both ideas might work out well. I'm just so anxious about giving the wrong view on sex after rape, or rape in general. I don't want to give the message that having sex is the only way to heal yourself after a rape experience, but I also don't want to stress that what my MC is doing might not be the way for everyone. But I also want to address the taboo of a rape victim having casual sex, and address the fact that there are things other than social isolation that mean someone is in a tough spot.

Kind of like, just because X is going to parties and having casual sex and speaks freely about her rape, doesn't mean she can just snap her fingers and be healed. Just because someone can describe exactly what the problem is, doesn't mean they can come up with a solution, and even if they do come up with a solution, it doesn't mean they can act on it without need of a support network. Someone can logically know exactly what they need to do, step by step, to fix something, but struggle enormously with it at the same time.

I now get why most fanfic writers in this fandom choose to skirt the edges of the universe it's set in. (There is a group of people who has near-absolute power over another group of people, and eagerly misuse those powers, including rape)

But from the get-go, my character (a Modern Girl who got transported into the fandom) was adamant about putting a stop to that. It's a big part of the first arc and bleeds through into the other arcs.

​

So far feedback has been good, readers were surprised about how she herself got raped, they're positive about the mental breakdowns she's had up until now, and they obviously voted for orgy-land and loss of inhibitions (using alcohol to self-medicate and getting addicted to it) as well as an extremely violent crackdown on the people/rapists in power. (she, er, basically got her rapist tied to the stake and burned him, old school style.)

​

Any thoughts on the bold parts in particular?

​

submitted by /u/ValerianCandy [link] [comments] from FanFiction: Where Magical Ponies battle Imperial Titans https://ift.tt/2QT3Hqc

[szopenhauer]

Who will you be spending Christmas with this year? no idea, I’d like to spend it with my parents but dad might work at the time and also sister can visit, I’m not even sure if I will be alive at the time nor if I want holidays as I have no money nor can’t eat much anyway

Did you go to high school with your current best friend? no Have you ever wanted to be vegetarian or vegan? maybe vegetarian but not a vegan for sure Do you park your car in a garage, carport or just in a driveway? we have no car

Have you seen any extended relatives in the last month? from afar Do you take part in paying the bills for your household? I don’t :( Have you ever properly listened to classical music? Did you like it? you mean if I listened to a live orchestra? not really Do your parents know how to text? not my mother Do you text your parents often? I text my father at least once a day when he’s at work What television channel do you watch the most? none anymore What will you do when this survey is over? take a bath and go to sleep, I play choices in the meantime, I might listen to music yet  What’s the weather like today? there was a thunderstorm How do you usually celebrate New Years? I was listening to music with my family, we had special food and then we looked at fireworks through the window drinking non alcoholic champagne  Is the place that you’re in right now quiet or loud? it’s quiet

What was the last thing you took a video of? what kind of friend I am on snapchat or smth on tik tok that I set as private

What’s something that used to really stress you out, but doesn’t anymore? school as I no longer attend it Do you prefer to be around introverted or extroverted people? I’m an introvert and I prefer NOT to be around people  Have you ever been somewhere where you didn’t fluently speak the local language? never but sometimes I go to the mall and there are ppl speaking russian instead of polish  Have you ever dated someone from a very different socioeconomic background? yep Were you born before or after the collapse of the Soviet Union? year after How often do you go grocery shopping? about every second day or third? If you got pregnant the 1st time you had sex, how old would the kid be now? it wouldn’t be born What was your last received text message about? M. wishing me good night Have you ever lived in a small community where everyone knew each other? my town was a bit like this when I was a baby Are you a procrastinator? huge What was the last thing you said out loud? BYE or smth like that

Have you ever worked over 50 hours in one week? I haven’t

Have you ever studied abroad? neither Do you have any medication that you keep with you at all times? sorta List three things that you need to get done in the next few days? take my dog to the vet, get my examinations results and give them to my gastrologist, go on a date, do grocery shopping etc. What’s something that’s much more difficult than a lot of people realize? being me What’s your opinion on couples ‘staying together for the kids?’ ugh... What was the last website you were on, before this one? Google Do you ever lose track of what day of the week it is? who doesn’t Were you raised by both of your parents? If not, then who raised you? could say so, my dad was busy often but I also had my grandma around Have you ever spent over $50 (€43) on a bottle of wine? - Have you ever locked your keys in your car? I don’t get it, how is that even possible? :o What season do you wish lasted longer? summer How old is the last male you texted? 60+ How old is the last female you texted? 28 Have you ever ‘taken a break’ in a relationship? If so, how did things turn out? could say so

How many times have you ever ridden an elephant? 0 but I want to What do you think about Lord of the Rings? cool

Do you have a lot of clothes hangers in your house? shitload Have you ever been in a Latin class? floristry  Have you ever had bubble gum stuck in your hair? once Is there any pet hair stuck to your clothing? I don’t think so Have you ever watched The Gremlins? nah Is your cell on charge? it is indeed What do you think about rainbows? ... Are you wearing anything on your head right now? am not Do you own a pet spider? I don’t Do you like mouthwash? I dislike it Do you use green pens? very rarely Are there any fake tattoos on you? none Can you roll your belly? a bit Is there a rocking chair in your house? there isn’t Have you ever gone to a Monster Truck show? would like to someday but it’s not necessary Have you ever been kicked in the throat? punched/slapped/hit  Do you like the song “Barbie Girl”? ironically Do you own a feather boa? blergh Do you wear ribbons in your hair? used to have this special decoration that I made myself - it was a ponytail made out of ribbons and my friends’ mom or grandma was calling it Krakowianka Do you use cheat codes on video games? motherlode How long has it been since you last slept? over ten hours Is the sound on your laptop or computer turned off? it’s on How many keychains do you own? too many lmfao Magnets? several Do you own anything with a peace sign on it? doubt it When is the last time you wore shorts? this month which is new/weird to me Do you like elevators or escalators? use them when I need to Is there anyone in the room with you? I’m alone When is the last time you pet an animal? today

Is it windy outside? who knows Have you ever met a dog named ‘Spot’? I called one this way

Do you usually wrap gifts or just put them in a bag? give them without packing or anything  When was the last time you were given jewelery as a gift? this year If you look out the window closest to you - what do you see? darkness Have you ever used crutches? for “fun” If Willy Wonka invited you to live with him, would you? ewww, creepy Do you own a pair of pink shoes? mhm Have you ever been in a tree house? sadly not Have you ever been outside in freezing cold weather with no jacket on? ha! it reminds me of the time we’ve been using hot glue for couple of hours to make floral decorations in class and we all started going crazy like on drugs and we wen outside in T-shirts in a freezing cold winter time to finish projects and we didn’t feel anything pfft - I wasn’t sick afterwards :P The last time you said “I want it” - what was it that you wanted? not sure what was last but I want health constantly if that counts What color are your sunglasses? they’re not colorful Are you picky about how your clothes fit? I like ‘em oversized Would you ever flirt with somebody in front of your parents? slightly Would you ever move to China? what for What material are the pants you’re wearing made of? cotton

How long have you had your current mattress? years Do you usually pay with cash, debit card, or credit card? cash always What do you usually drink with breakfast? I drink water an hour after breakfast

Are you the type of person who can make friends with just about anyone? me? r u kidding? What’s your least favorite time of day? morning because of waking up but sunrises are pretty  How many burners does your stove have? 4 When you go to a restaurant, do you prefer to sit at a booth or a table? table Which room of your house is currently in the greatest need of cleaning? *shrug* not mine  When was the last time you shipped a package? uh oh I don’t even remember  Have you ever made a homemade pie? with my mom How old is your oldest cousin? don’t ask me

Do you ever have binges that last for hours, watching YouTube videos? not that long

Have you ever recorded yourself doing a cover of a song? ^^”

Are there any movies out there that basically make you want to puke? Gummo *someone once told me it reminds them of me and I wasn’t able to watch half of it as it was so disgusting and that comment feels like one of the worst offensive shit anybody ever told [about] me

Are either of your parents laid of from work at the moment? retired

Any secrets you’d never tell anyone? No matter how close they are to you? no secrets like this

Have you ever told a secret on one of your friends you promised otherwise? you got me

Do you consider yourself a promiscious person? I’m an asexual but recently... Look to your left, what’s the first blue thing you see right now? there’s nothing blue on my left side atm as there’s a window 

Do you know anyone who has AIDS? What about yourself? no one that I know of 

Has anyone ever mistaken you to be a member of the opposite sex? plenty of times

What’s one thing in your room you would die if your SO found? I wouldn’t die, I might be embarassed if anything

Does your school have a swimming pool? Or no? my schools didn’t have swimming pools

Do you prefer cappuccinos or frappuccinos? I only tried cappuccino before  Would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean? lake Are there any plants in your home? omg yes What food does honey go best with? I liked yoghurt with honey when I was a child Have you ever carved a pumpkin? less than 5 times Do you love seeing frost hanging off leaves in the Winter? I like it on windows only Have you ever reread a book? no? Would you ever like to own a chandelier? not crystal one 

Do you have any religious symbols in your home? bunch What religion do you identify with, if any? Christianity If you could have a small garden in your backyard, what would you plant? you mean vegetables?

Do you enjoy those tins of butter cookies? yeah Do you own any art supplies? I gave away most of them Do you prefer writing in pen or pencil? pen How many notebooks do you own? Are they all filled? I own lots of filled and empty notebooks

Are you currently sitting on your bed? I’m not

Did anything tend to make you extremely happy today?  nope

What month is it?  August

Do you know where the remote to the closest television is located or not? I know

Name one interesting fact about yourself that people might not know about? I hate The Nanny Affair on Choices and play it only to get diamonds

Do you ever have to write down a phone number to remember it, or not? every single time

Do you know anyone who has man-boobs?  many men have “boobs” *in middle school we had a guy who they were calling Pamela (Anderson) because of that

Do you know anyone who constantly puts themselves down?  that me

When was the last time you had a piece of cake?  yesterday or day before

Do you know anyone who has their septum pierced? Does it look painful? not personally

Do you think some famous people just shouldn’t be famous at all?  lots

Has anyone ever complimented you on your singing? Did you believe them? once in primary school and I think they tried to flirt with me but I believe they were lying or maybe they just tried to make fun of me? 

Has anyone ever kissed you in the rain? Did it seem romantic at the time? no thx

When was the last time you listened to a genre of you music you despise? in public, it was loud so I couldn’t help it

How satisfied with life are you at this exact moment in time? Why is this? no comment