#he’s so petty and catty and silly

[biasomnia]

I’ve been reading the Haikyuu manga and I decided that I’d do some redraws as a I go, and here are some that turned out nicely! Hinata’s hair is slowly getting curlier(wavier?fluffier? whatever it is it’s easier than straight hair) and I like it a lot, looks like those old timey drawings of the sun. I need to do a full Inuoka drawing for me and his 5 other fans.

[avocado-writing]

hihi! can i please request the bg3 male companions + rolan and a tav who can’t read? my tav grew up in the woods so although they’re a strong folk hero, they can’t read and they’re very insecure about it!!! thank you so much! i love ur work avo

what a sweet idea for a Tav! Writing as if you want to learn to read when the truth comes out.

Astarion

Wants to be catty but can see how genuinely upset you are by the idea he’s mock you, so holds off.

He’s so used to being dramatic he can’t work out how to be genuine with you about this.

Gets some advice from around the camp - mainly Wyll - about good starting off books, and makes a shopping trip.

If you want him to he sits with you and helps you sound out the words, even when you’re frustrated, and is so pleased whenever you’re proud of finishing a sentence.

Gale

If you want to learn, he’ll teach you - but it will be hard going.

You have a lesson every night. It’s infuriating. He’s very calm and patient though, never mocking you for not understanding something or taking a while to get it.

Is overly reassuring, letting you know it’s fine you didn’t know until now and he’s proud he can help you take that step.

The first thing you wrote him - a thank-you note with a shaky hand - is pressed in the jacket of his favourite book, a precious keepsake.

Wyll

Will offer to help teach you, or if you’d prefer, will get you a tutor when times are more settled.

If the latter, when he is duke, he gets you the finest teacher to help you learn how to read.

If the former he gets a set of his childhood favourites and helps you sound out the words, enthusiastically encouraging you each and every time.

Eventually he writes you love letters to read, and then you write them back - and he has a treasured timeline of your courtship to keep.

Halsin

He did not grow up learning to read, either. There were far more important things in the forest. Letters have their place, of course, but nature is far more valuable.

If you want to learn, you join in the lessons with the cartloads of children he adopts under the guise of observation - and afterwards he’s always happy to see how you’re getting along.

At the same time there is no pressure. He loves you as you are and sees no reason for you to change, unless it’s something you want for yourself.

Rolan

You’re so used to bickering with him, he’s floored when this truth is revealed - he wants to say something petty but knows the look of hurt in your eyes, waiting for him to sling barbs.

In fact he leaves mid-squabble because he’s so surprised.

The next day you come to find he’s been doing research for you - spells which make reading easier to parse, text-to-speech enchantments, any discreet tutors around the city…

He’s too proud to accept your thanks, still the same silly stubborn tiefling you fell for. But you do see his cheeks grow flushed when you kiss him…

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

Sometimes it really gets me how Ed has been so firmly dehumanized for so, so long.

Even before we meet him, Ed is never talked about like he's a person. Pete describes him as something less than human, a thing with smoke for a head. He's set apart from humanity by the legends surrounding him. The pictures of him in books and wanted posters are ghoulish caricatures. Izzy calls him a "thing" when he's daring to act like who he is, just a happy gay man, and later a "wild dog" when he was drowning in hopelessness and self-hatred. He's compared to a donkey, exoticized at a party even when he's not being Blackbeard. It's so pervasive that Ed refers to himself as a monster, making up stories about a Kraken to set himself apart from humanity, tells Stede he was always going to recognize "what" he is.

Even Ed's suicide attempt - look, Ed's smart. He could've devised some painless death. He specifically wanted to be brutally put down like the wild dog Izzy calls him.

And it hurts! Because Ed is so very human! He's goofy and he fucks up and he does his best to apologize, and he can be petty and catty and self-absorbed at times! He feels intensely and he loves deeply and he's so full of hope!

More than anything, what I wanted from season 3 was for Ed to just get to be a person. He deserves to welcome himself back to the human race, to get to be soft and silly and goofy and make mistakes and know that nothing he does will ever make him into the monster he thought he was for so long. He's just a very human man, not a monster, capable of loving and of being loved, and he so deserves to be able to see that.

[daistea]

Hey, so. I wanted to ask about the interpretation of pre-Dungeon Lord Mithrun as being very catty and Regina George-like. Personally, and I've got no problems with it, I'm just really curious where it comes from, but I don't get that read. He was catty and petty and all sorts of unpleasant, but Misril essentially confirms that he kept it all inside because he seemed so perfect and his Dungeon was some great surprise to her. Built on lies and jealousy and inferiority but she had no idea whatsoever. He was festering in silence, I think, and all that ugliness was tucked inside. He was scrambling. Probably imagining himself as alone and unique in his ugliness and failing to speak truthfully about his feelings because he must've been taught that ugly things - like affairs and disabled brothers? - are to be hidden. You're something else before you're a person, so you must be nice and kind and good and emblematic of that. And it isn't as if I was raised in any position of power, but royal houses can be sort of emblematic of that kind of repression of personality, where being small and quiet and smooth and obedient is "good personhood". He was revealed as a mean drunk, but that's about it. Truly, I think catty Mithrun is comfortable Mithrun, so I like to imagine that post-Dungeon Mithrun is the catty one. I think it's funny to imagine our relationship, as it were, and imagine people watching with him and judging people for the fun of it. It's not personal or to feel better or anything. It's just because, and he says some truly out of pocket shit, and I'm there, a little reprimanding, like, "Oh my God! You can't just say that..." and I'm looking at him. And he's looking at me without saying anything. An eyebrow raised. My expression cracks. I look away and snort. "God," I say again. "Oh my God. Yeah. Okay. Fine." Laughingly, "Uh... That's the tackiest, brightest jacket I've ever seen in my life. It is disgustingly offensive. My eyes are practically burning. Is that it?" And he smiles a little. Barely there. And I groan and lightly smack his shoulder. "Is that what you wanted to hear?" He shrugs, "Was it honest?" "Yeah. I mean, I'm exaggerating for the fun of it all, but..." I shudder. "God, it's horrible," and then maybe I get into it, like the minutiae of opinions. Being very opinionated. "And it's worse because not even badly shaped! It'd be fine if it was, like, a simple black coat or something. The texture looks okay, but it has the worst patterning, the worst shapes and colors and—!" And he's laughing out loud. Holding his hands on his stomach, because I've gone full into gesturing and I'm getting so heated about a stupid coat that doesn't even matter, but it's fun! It's amazing. We're having a great time, and I'm laughing, too, because it's silly and it doesn't matter and I'm happy like this. We both are. He frowns a little, and goes, "Okay, what about that shirt?" and making his own statements, like "Ugh. That gold looks like vomit", and we play off eachother, like "Ough. Yeah, and that red with that shade is so bright." I raise my eyebrows. "Evocative." Mithrun hums. "Blood and vomit," he nods. "Ew." We look at eachother and shake our heads sort of sagely. And then I crack first. I almost always break first.

Ye when we joke about pre-dungeon Mithrun being catty, it’s more like he’s catty on the inside. He’s canonly critical and judgmental and angry in his own mind, but I think he also genuinely loves his friends. He just can’t help but be a negative nelly in his head bc insecurity and whatnot. I think if pre-dungeon Mithrun was especially close to someone, close enough to let his true nature show(which would be incredibly rare) then he’d express those thoughts outwardly. But in secret. Nobody realizes he’s catty, but he is. Because he’s passive aggressive and fake lol

I do think post-dungeon Mithrun is a jerk too, but he has no reservations about expressing it anymore because he has no desire to keep up appearances. He doesn’t dislike his old self because his old self was mean, he dislikes his old self because he just automatically dislikes himself in any form. And even then I think that’s subconscious. When he corrects Kabru and basically says ‘no I wasn’t perfect at all’ he’s just stating a fact. He has very little feeling on the matter other than resentment towards his own actions and emotions that led him to the demon and subsequent trauma.

I think Misiril prob taught him that being relatively polite gets him places, it keeps everybody around him from wanting to leave. And if they left then he wouldn’t have the necessary manpower to defeat the demon. So if he makes the decision to keep certain thoughts to himself, it’s either because it’s easiest/out of habit/to prevent an obstacle in his quest. I mean obviously he still says outlandish crap (“Inferior species.” “CAPTAIN THATS RACIST!”) but I think that’s because he knows it wont really matter in the long run in those cases, so he just says whatever’s on his mind without a care of how it sounds.

But yeah post-canon Mithrun would probably be way more relaxed. If he’s with someone he’s close to, he’d point out an ugly shirt. I wouldn’t call him catty, because there’s no passive aggressive-ness there. He’s just blunt. His old self would have an absolute heart attack because iTS NOT PROPER STOP IT YOURE GOING TO MAKE PEOPLE HATE YOU!!!

The juxtaposition between his past and present is so interesting. They’re like two different people, so different but still similar in some ways. Hmm

[everybodyloveshippos]

modern au drizzt as a park ranger silly doodles and silly ideas under the cut

drizzt is a park ranger. montolio is another park ranger who drizzt claims can do a whole bunch of cool stuff despite his age/blindness but no one believes him bcus they've only ever seen montolio napping inside.

artemis is a modern bounty hunter and regis breached his bail conditions unfortunately artemis cant get a fucking permit to search the park because drizzt is a) petty and b) definitely letting regis hide in his residence

i don’t really know what everyone else does bcus this is not a very solid or serious AU but I do know that kimmuriel has to ream jarlaxle out for posting his location publicly on his tiktok

artemis is a hater but watches all of catti-bries instagram stories that feature drizzt (drizzt doesnt have social media) bcus he is an obsessed hater as we all know

drizzt doesnt get along w his family but vierna does have his number at least. sometimes he will go to his dad’s house who lives alone.

this is very silly . but so is the legend of drizzt

[anonymousredactedconfessions]

i started bingeing the podcast last week for the first time and i think the podcast made me like erik a little less (it did not make me dislike him! just like him a littleeee less)? not in a like 'cAnCeL hIm' kinda way no that's silly but only in a way that's a 'maybe i'll step away from things (podcast, livestreams, qnas, patreon, etc) where i can learn more about him' 'cause i can still enjoy media made by people that i'm pretty neutral on.

his personality seems cute and he's funny! lmao only some of the stories he's shared there are him bein petty asl to people, even to his own friends lol (trying to make his friend jealous on purpose by locking himself (erik) in the room with the friend's gf (he didn't do anything! just sat in there with her just to piss his friend off for the drama lol), pushed an acquaintance abruptly into a mosh pit because he didn't actually like her, almost unrelated lmao but has conservative friends?? (not 100% on this one but the stories make me think so lol. he and the friend on the podcast aren't conservative but one or two of the other close friends they have mentioned?? lol) etc. catty story, etc. catty story).

nothing that makes me want to never listen to him again or something like no it's not that serious lmao some stories have this cattiness streak about him in them that i'm like 'i don't quite care to learn more about this man i think' lol. but hey, now i know and know i prefer to enjoy the audio rp only without acknowledging the man behind the curtain (and to give benefit of the doubt, nobody is perfect/he's just some guy lol and some guys are just catty lol and of the several catty stories that made me send this ask, a few of them were from awhile ago! maybe he's even kinder now! i won't keep listening to the podcast to find out via more anecdotes anymore but maybe lol!)

.

[star-ocean-peahen]

Christmas is a time for famil.............ial dysfunction!!

hahahahaha im the only person in this house who doesn't explode when upset hahahahahaha isnt it funny how that sounds like im a better person but i really just lash out quietly and sarcastically instead hahahahahaha and thats definitely worse because it's more insidious and hurts people when they have less of a chance to understand it hahahahahahaha

hahaha dad snapped at me for trying to protect my sibling from his forceful anxious rants and like yeah thats not the best way to go about the situation i see that now. its not going to work to tell him he's said enough because 1) he does not want to hear that 2) he does not want to hear that from me 3) hed never stop anyway because hes not ACTUALLY saying it for other people's benefit he's saying it because he doesn't believe emotional validation is a legitimate emotional need so he doesn't allow himself to have it so his anxieties have to come out somehow and this is how they do that and i cant really get down on him for that because i did it too!! when you dont have another outlet the anxieties will still come out but just in a non-constructive way!! of course whenever MINE did that he mocked me and made sure i knew EXACTLY how disgusting and cruel he thought i was being but BECAUSE of that i know how it feels and i dont want to do it to him!! the point is that i dont want anyone else to feel like i did and that includes the person who made me feel that way!! because he doesn't really deserve the grace and respect he never gave me but im going to try to give it to him anyway!! because thats the point of breaking the cycle!! but hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh my drive to protect my younger sibling is stronger in the moment than my drive to break the cycle and i dont know what to DO to do it the right way and i dont have to get it right esp when it isnt my job.................i just hate to see him saying things that hurt me so much to them...........

and its so fuckign. hard to remember that small humans have no better way of dealing with their emotions so they express them in non-constructive ways. because theyre being little rats.

and my mom is like the only one actually trying to make this celebration fun for everyone and she cant handle the emotional weight of everyone's problems on top of organizing the entire holiday for everyone. she can't do it. i watched her break down in the kitchen. shes doing better now but its not fair!! its not fair that this is happening to her!! its not fair that this is happening to us all!! its not fair that i had to be strong for her when i was repressing all of these feelings!! its not fucking fair that i love them so much!!

and im part of the problem!! i know that!! i make situations worse because im upset!! i tell my dad off for not deescalating when i suck at deescalating too!! im catty and petty and im definitely traumatizing my siblings in the way i was and thats eating me up inside!! i dont know how to do this better and i cant be expected to do this better but FUCK i hate it!!

i just. i wish my siblings could calm themselves down i wish my dad could successfully deescalate situations and not get into stupid arguments that he has to win to make up for his lack of consistent validation i wish my mom could stop yelling at my siblings i wish she could have enough support that she doesnt have to feel anxious i wish my family was NOT SO FUCKING DYSFUNCTIONAL.

its silly goofy but my anthem for when my dad makes me feel bad is the living tombstone song "i can't fix you" because it makes me feel better but its not just that i cant fix them i cant even HELP them. or even if i can i hurt more than i help. wanting to help doesnt translate to succeeding. fuck. i just. i just dont want anyone to feel like i did. but i make them feel that way more than i save them from it. fuck. do i have a thing about saving people. do i care more about feeling like i saved someone than actually being what they need. i dont fucking know.

[deeplyridiculouslyinlove]

I find this so funny because the show made me like the kids soooo much more. I’m not going to write a whole treatise on how I don’t think “here’s a tower of women who are unable to hold power without devolving into petty, catty arguments and as a bonus they’re nearly all incompetent, so it’s right that we mistrust the sneaky women and don’t worry they will literally all be brought down a peg by the story (and often by teenage boys)” is particularly well-executed in the series (or how it fails to be progressive or interesting commentary, which I do think RJ was going for although not every author is trying to do that).

But I *will* say that I think the show has really brought out the kindness and empathy in Rand that we need for his later arc, the vulnerability in Mat that he is trying so desperately to hide behind bravado and silly pranks, the loneliness of Perrin that leads him to embrace leadership and build community, Nynaeve’s deep fear of both power and powerlessness and how being exceptional can be a curse, and Egwene’s desperate desire to be seen and have meaning for her life. I like them all well enough by the end of the books (some I love), but I love ALL of them already in the show. They’re such rich characters! I understand why they each feel the (unique!) way they do about Moiraine and the Aes Sedai! We’re seeing sides of them from the beginning that it takes multiple books to get to in the series! Wild take to not like them in the show. They’re not even that bratty? Like even Nynaeve’s hatred of Moiraine is funny (although I find it funny in the books too lol, Rand’s “I will not be used” grates on me far more than anything Nynaeve ever does or says about Moiraine).

😶

[otvlanga]

Atgeir :)

Full Name: Atgeir (no family surname as he was born poor)

Gender and Sexuality: Male, straight

Pronouns: He/Him

Ethnicity/Species: Nord

Birthplace and Birthdate: Kynesgrove, 27th of Morning Star 4E 173

Guilty Pleasures: Definitely seafood. He gorges himself on roasted fish, horker loafs, and mudcrab legs at any chance he gets. He especially loves salmon and clam chowder soup. He also really loves listening to gossip and drama, and regularly keeps up with all the juicy details of every hold’s scandal by chatting up the bartenders in the Inns and Taverns. Shamelessly spends all his money in shops on trivial things that he’ll never use, like silly knick-knacks and 36 pairs of insulated wool socks even though he’s a Nord and doesn’t even need them to keep warm.

Phobias: Chaurus hunters scare the living daylights out of him. Any insects scare him really, but flying ones especially. There’s also a rumor going around Skyrim that the great Dragonborn of Legend is afraid of the ocean and can’t handle swimming or sailing in deep waters... pff, what a fake nord

What They Would Be Famous For: If he wasn’t the Dragonborn, he’d probably go down in history as the guy who got super blackout drunk and married a Hagraven. It’s a good thing him killing Alduin will overshadow that in the history books, though.

What They Would Get Arrested For: Eating all of the Jarl’s food and vomiting on the steward in a drunken stupor. 

OC You Ship Them With: None of them

OC Most Likely To Murder Them: Avezor, because he would see Atgeir as a threat to his ambitions.

Favorite Movie/Book Genre: Despite his miner/farmer-turned-warrior status, he loves to read! He especially loves history and autobiographies, as well as mysteries.

Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: He hate’s the chosen one cliche because he quite literally lives that reality, and finds the way it’s portrayed and romanticized in books frustrating. 

Talents and/or Powers: He’s very talented at dual wielding one handed weapons, which isn’t a common strategy or fighting-style among Nords. He’s also an excellent cook, far better than any of the Blue Palace chefs in Solitude. 

Why Someone Might Love Them: Atgeir is a very loyal and reliable person, and puts great emphasis on the importance of keeping his word and following through with his promises. He warm and kind to anyone he meets, but also stands up for himself and others when needed be. He can be generous and charitable when capable, and get’s things done efficiently. He isn’t a slacker and is a very active and hard-working person.

Why Someone Might Hate Them: He is very indecisive and takes a long time to make decisions and arrange plans, regardless of how pressing the matter at hand is. He can be very meddlesome and sticks his nose in people’s business when it isn’t wanted, usually either for the sake of wanting to help or just because he’s terrible at minding his own business. Many Nords also dislike how sensitive he is, as it’s seen as “weak” and “cowardly”, and he gets quite annoying when he’s upset/offended. He gives people the silent treatment and doesn’t like talking about his problems, and is prone to spiteful or petty revenge schemes that make him seem very catty and bitchy. He’s also partial to lying in certain situations where he thinks he’s doing the right thing by doing so, which puts his trustworthiness to question despite his loyal nature. 

How They Change: Through his journey, he becomes a much more logical person, and learns the virtue of forgiveness and develops a much more open-minded way of thinking. He learns how to listen better and look at situations from an objective point of view. However he also grows into the habit of looking at many things with a pessimistic view, and loses patience with the idea of communicating with people and eventually decides to retire to High Hrothgar for some much needed time away from Skyrim’s political scene. By the time he’s old and grey and speaks for the many new followers of the Way of the Voice, he’s a powerful and active influence in Skyrim once again, and takes his position in stride as he retells the importance of balance and peace just as Paarthurnax and the Greybeards before once taught him. 

Why You Love Them: He’s kind of a token posterboy Dragonborn and I honestly love it. He’s not incredibly unique outside of being the Chosen One and I like that because it makes him feel very realistic. I like the idea that the LDB was really just some average joe and wound up being a living legend. He’s my only completely Nord character so it’s really easy implementing the importance of his destiny into who he is as a person, because Skyrim is his home and he has a deeply personal reason for doing the things he does. also hes sexy

[queenofeden]

okay so look, i wasn’t going to make a post about this because i genuinely didn’t think it was anything worth making a post about “publicly” but apparently some people disagree and i’m petty enough about this to not want there to be any confusion on where i stand.

i really enjoyed the new prologue update, and the changes made to the routes (minor ones, and i’ve only play tested nadia and julian so far to see them but they are there) to reflect them. i really enjoyed the last update they made to it as well. i always enjoyed the prologue, clearly it’s what got me into the game in the first place. i found it engaging and fun to play and i enjoyed the characters immediately off the bat. 

however that prologue was written a long time ago. 2016 if i remember correctly, and a lot about the game has changed since then. the prologue, even up to yesterday, was still full of what i would consider hanging plot threads and characterizations that simply no longer reflected or suited the game that we have today. a game which i love very much and still actively enjoy the direction of.

i really want to thank @raquellle-arcana for their post on the matter (linked here) because it was the first one i saw that reflected my same excitement amidst and field of far more negative feedback, but especially for this quote, 

“I love that they went back & changed it, like that to me, shows how much they still care, & that the creators genuinely want to improve & nurture their game”

this is what it comes down to for me. as a creative and a creator, i think it’s really important to be able to look at work u have made, work you’ve been proud of, and still acknowledge that it can be improved. this is not a published novel that lives in perpetuity, this is an interactive narrative game. as the narrative progresses and matures and expands, things that used to be priority no longer are and that is okay. looking back on where the characters and the story were based on the information given in the art book vs where they are now is fascinating to me, and i love seeing how the game has evolved and grown. i agree wholeheartedly that it does show a genuine love and care for the game on their part.

it shows that they want and continue to want the game to be relevant and enjoyable, that they want the “new” routes to have more substantial representation, that they wanted to integrate the new plot lines into the prologue in a way that made them make more sense as potential outcomes as opposed to “well they just had to make them different from the original 3″. i don’t know a single writer or artist or any creator that doesn’t look at their old works and wish that they could change things or, if they had known then what they know now, go back and adjust for it. the devs have the opportunity to do that, and i’m glad that they continue to take those opportunities to make their game, a living document if u will, the best version of itself that it can be.

(cut for length bc i continued to ramble and also potential spoilers for the new content)

i love that asra and mc’s relationship is well established now, i love that so much of the story and lore feels organically given and much more show and not tell. i love that asra’s characterization feels more consistent with how he is in his and other routes instead of the hinted but never actualized “ominous, dark, and vaguely spooky” angle (which don’t get me wrong, is a really valid and interesting version of asra that i do love to play with but tonally it just didn’t work with where he’s ended up now). 

i love that julian is no longer so bent on a revenge angle that is never concluded in his route bc it was no longer relevant. i love that his background and involvement is more well integrated. even so far as his acknowledgement of malak, not as his magical familiar obviously, but just in that he’s clearly important to julian specifically. the wanted posters were one of the things i loved best about the first prologue update, just that little bit of information felt like the sun parting the clouds so far as world building and i’m glad that kind of thing was expanded upon even further with him.

i love that nadia’s motivations are much clearer, and that her characterization is much more in line with her morals given in the text. truly, i felt that she read as so much more competent in this newest version, something i never doubted about her, but really seeing it so early made a huge difference to me. i’ve always been a nadia main and i have loved her from the moment i set eyes on her, but i i’m well aware that many people do not feel that way and never get to her route where many of the criticisms no longer hold water. i’m hoping that this is no longer the case. it makes me happy to see her relationship with lucio cleared up, that thirst to prove herself is made very apparent, but at the same time so is her genuine compassion and kindness. the explicit statement that the masquerade is no longer a celebration hinging specifically on the murder of julian makes SUCH a big difference. nadia states over and over in her route that that is not the kind of ruler she wants to be so it’s lovely to see that reflected. she is a woman searching for the truth, no matter what it is, something that the high priestess would be proud of i think. 

i could go through and itemize everything that i loved about what they’ve done, but we would be here for 12 hours and nobody wants to read a post that long, i know. to mobile users, i’m already sorry lmao.

but listen, much as i am excited about the new stuff and the updated stuff, i do understand being disappointed at things that have been taken out. i do, i really do. i also loved feeling julian up, but on the whole i also acknowledge that scene as deeply fanservice-y. that’s not a problem by any means, but it’s also something that i think shows the devs and their growth as writers to potentially be able to look back on that and say, “this was fun and we liked it but it doesn’t actually serve the story in an appropriate way anymore”. that takes a lot of maturity, and i think that maturity is reflected by the state of the prologue now. it feels much less at times like a “silly, horny otome game” and more like a proper visual novel with a lot of meat to it. and there’s still plenty of room for the fun horny stuff. it’s littered throughout the routes and not at all absent in the prologue, just, i think, integrated in a far more natural, gracious way.

i felt, on the whole, at least so far as my MC’s personal characterization, that in the old prologue i was much more wont to pick paid scenes bc i had bought them and i wanted to see them over whether they actually made sense narratively in my version of the story, or whether my apprentice would actually do them. i didn’t feel that conflict anymore, anything i wanted to do, i felt i was able to do and with a level of choice i was comfortable with. not only did the canon characters feel more “in character” now, but i would argue that MC feels more like a real character far more quickly than they used to.

i’m sorry to the people who feel disappointed by the new updates, or that in some way the game has been “ruined” for u. your opinions are yours, and your decisions with what to do next are your prerogative. media consumption and how someone interacts with it is a deeply personal thing. i only wanted to speak my mind and make this post if only because these attitudes were all i was seeing, and i was suddenly inundated by the negative reaction and it was upsetting to me. it made me angry. i’m still a little angry, and i could certainly cite and quote a bunch of the nonsense i’ve seen spouted off in just the last few hours alone but honestly, i’m too tired for it and i’m liable to get catty and petty.

what it comes down to is this, the new update made me excited about the game again, it made me want to replay everything with fresh eyes, it made me want to dig my fingers into the lore again, it made me want to talk and play and enjoy canon for what it is after being very much more consumed with aus lately. i want to openly thank NH and @thearcanagame for continuing to make a game that is fun to play, a story that is engaging and keeps me on my toes, and for sharing something that they’re clearly proud of and want to continue to be proud of. that level of responsibility and dedication to their work is inspiring to me as a creator and as a fan, and it makes me proud to be even a tangential part of the whole of it. i hope that over the months and years, the game continues to update and improve and build upon itself, even if for whatever reason i’m no longer around to see it.

[lacramorga]

— SHIP QUESTIONS

PRE-RELATIONSHIP

° How did they first meet?

  -The Centrifical Carburettor, a newly constructed experimentation hall for steam locomotives. Ondolerinde had just been sponsored by Dean Valkner An and was a full citizen of the Clockwork City, receiving a tour of the Brass Fortress.

° What was their first impression of each other?

  - Sotha Sil? Mildly impressed at the new addiction to the Apostles. He thought he was...cute? Why did he think that? No, no, he can't find anyone cute. It was unprofessional.

  - Ondolerinde? He was infatuated immediately, like instantly. Love at first sight. There was a Living God in front of him and Sotha Sil was better than anyone could describe. He was so in awe he dropped his books and notes in a flustered mess.

° Did any of their friends or family want them to get together?

  -Neither of their families, alive or otherwise, don't know so they have no say.

° Who felt romantic feelings first?

  -Surprisingly? Sotha Sil.

° Did either of them try to resist their feelings?

  -Both. One out of professionalism and the other respect. Ondolerinde saw Sotha as a person that shouldn't interact with mere mortals to begin with, much less have a romantic relationship with.

   -For Sotha Sil he initially believed similar. It was rare for him to interact with people, Apostles or otherwise. He couldn't single out one of his own followers...could he?

° If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think?

  - "You really think so? At least I'm not the only one." Ondolerinde would be so happy someone would agree.

  - What's a soulmate? Sotha would be confussion. He's never heard the term before among the youngins but he never put any stock into such a preposterous idea.

GENERAL

° Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go?

  - Sotha Sil. It was very...awkward.

He marched right up to Ondolerinde and said, matter-of-factly, "We're dating now".

° Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like?

  - Date? Like spend time with each other? Nothing but each other? With no one around? Just them? That was Sil's shit.

They had a relaxed date where they walked to the Pavilion of Artifice and Sotha explained various Fabricants along the way.

° What was their first kiss like?

  - Random, forceful and lead to tongue.

° Were they each other's first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)?

- Sotha Sil experienced many things in his time. Kissing, love, and such. The only 'first' for him was the prospect of marriage.

- Ondolerinde on the other hand...experienced nothing in his childhood and teen years. He wasn't allowed to have crushes, first-loves or casual relationships in Alinor and when he worked with his Legion, that mindset continued.

Sotha Sil was his in every aspect.

  ° What's their height difference? Age difference?

  - Inside the Clockwork City? Only a few millimeters. On the outside? Roughly sixteen inches.

  -Sotha Sil's exact age is a mystery. I would put the difference around 3,390 years.

Ondolerinde is 50 years of age and Sotha Sil is 3,440.

° Who takes the lead in social situations?

  - It depends on the social situation.

If the situation is Apostles and Factotums then Sotha Sil takes the lead, as it should be. He's the boss, the main man, he shouldn't have a mouthpiece around his own people and creations.

Which means Ondolerinde picks up the slack for every other situation, which is fine to him. If for some reason they're outside the Clockwork City Ondolerinde is dealing with dignitaries, students and his Tribunal siblings.

° Who gets jealous easier?

  - Ondolerinde, but not in a traditional sense.

His partner is a Living God, who built an entire city, everything in it and he has to run the place. He's never jealous for Sil's time and attention but maybe once in a while he gets jealous by that new Factotum that's being built.

LOVE

° Who said "I love you" first?

  - Ondolerinde!

° What are their primary love languages?

  - Sotha Sil: Giving and receiving gifts, quality time.

  - Ondolerinde: Acts of service, touch.

° How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA?

  - They cuddle quite often, almost constantly but the Somnolostation isn't the optimal for being near each other. The 'Nestleberth Crucible' is an invention Sotha Sil made specifically designed to allow them to cuddle, work and be together for lengthy amounts of time.

  - As for PDA its uncommon. Sil doesn't want to appear he favours one of his Apostles over any others, he might loose credibility and followers. So the closest PDA will be a lingering touch on the small of Ondolerinde's back or touching his wrist.

° What are their favorite things to do together?

  - Explore Dwemer ruins, if there's ever a moment they get more than a days reprieve they're in a far flung corner of the world being adventurers! Finding remnants and knowledge left behind that could aid them.

  - If they aren't working or learning then they're being catty. There are instances of Sotha Sil being a petty bitch and sassing though never out of malicious intent.

Almalexia especially, that's their favorite topic to gossip about.

° Who's better at comforting the other?

  - Ondolerinde, by far.

He has a special view on the world, or that's how Sil interprets the Altmer's way of thinking. He knows exactly what to say and when to say it and it helps immensely. No matter what the situation is.

° Who's more protective?

  - Sotha Sil.

He's seen too much death, destruction and lost too many people in his life. It drives him to be better for Ondolerinde, to be there more and do more things so he doesn't loose him like his last Lover.

It also keeps him up, over-thinking and worrying.

° What kind of nicknames do they call each other?

  - Silly and cheesy names.

My Heart to Ondolerinde.

My Architect, Tinker and Thinker to Sotha Sil.

DOMESTIC LIFE

° If they get married, who proposes?

  - Sotha Sil.

He had a ring on him for years if not a century or two always waiting for that opportunity to spring the question. The perfect moment never arose so he popped the question in the middle of the night, no warning.

Thankfully Ondolerinde said yes!

° What's the wedding like? Who attends?

  - The wedding is small and takes place in two areas. The Basilica and a sequestered area in Alinor.

  - For the Basilica service the Congress of Calibration and the Tribunal were invited, Divayth Fyr showed up, so they'd be made aware of their relationship and how much it meant to both of them.

  - In Alinor, as strenuous as it was, Ondolerinde's parents and immediate family were invited for a private reciting of their vows.

° How many kids do they have, if any? What are they like?

  - A boy, Othalos Sothal.

Othalos is a pretty solid mix of his parents.

He's logical, calm, generous and compassionate. Too smart for his own good and dangerously curious, a volatile combination.

° Who's the stricter parent?

- They're equally as strict, which isn't much as they're complete pushovers.

° Who kills the bugs in the house?

- Skeevatrons!

° How do they celebrate holidays?

- They don't.

° Who's more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning?

- On any given morning it could be either.

Mostly it's Ondolerinde asking for a few more minutes of contact before Sil is off to make sure the world hasn't imploded on someone else's watch.

° Who's the better cook?

- Sotha Sil.

He finds cooking to be similar to building a fabricant, different parts going in and a whole new item being discovered and when he discovered his then crush didn't like the Nutrient Paste, he decided to change the game.

[patilsurvivor]

⧼   alia bhatt, , cis woman, she/her /  the archer by taylor swift + hypnotising flames dancing in an open fireplace ; crushed tea leaves at the bottom of the tea cup ; wind howling in empty corridors  ⧽   ━━   hey, isn’t that PARVATI PATIL? i read a daily prophet article on them, once ; the TWENTY FOUR year old [ pure blood ] WITCH  is a [ GRYFFINDOR alumnus who has gone on to be a STORE ASSISTANT AT WEASLEY WIZARD WHEEZES ]. i’ve heard they can be quite  BRAVE & PRINCIPLED, but i don’t know… they came off very BLUNT & CATTY in that interview. it really is hard to know what to believe these days though, isn’t it?   [   plume, 26, gmt+1, she/her + tw snake and suicide ]

Hey I’m Plume and I’m super excited to join this group. It’s been too long since I wrote in the HP universe. I can’t wait to plot with you all. Here you have my vision of Parvati in this AU !

Family

Parvati and Padma were born to second generation Indian wizards immigrants. Their mother, Nusrat, worked in Saint Mungo and their father, Prajeet, had a shop specialised in magical items from India and other parts of Asia in Diagon Alley. Prajeet was a ravenclaw alumni and Nusrat a hufflepuff alumni. Prajeet insisted on choosing a name starting with a p for the twins to follow a family tradition. The twins had a great childhood and comfortable home life with two loving parents.

Hogwarts

Honestly I did not change anything from what is canon in the books.  Parvati was a lively girl who enjoyed gossiping, pretty and girly things. She was best friend with Lavender Brown. She loved divination and transfiguration. She had even planed on making a career in divination after graduating. She dreamed of opening a shop with Lavender under Professor Trelawney’s guidance. She was a popular and pretty girl who knew her place in the school’s social hierarchy. (Dean did call her and Padma “the best looking girls in the year”) Yet she was compassionate and stood up for what she believed was right and for people she cared about (defending Neville or Harry for example). Being full of contradictions, Parvati defended people but also mocked others and spread rumours. She had a catty side and Lavender and her could be truly irritating to be around.  

People who did not know her viewed her as shallow but if one paid closer attention they could see that there was more to her than petty gossip. Parvati cared about her grades and school work. She was a good student not as brilliant as Hermione but was serious about her studies and performed well. 

She was excited to go with Harry to the Yule Ball, and could have gone with anyone as she was popular among the boys. She agreed to go with Harry out of vanity. He was champion and she liked the attention. Since Harry proved to be a terrible date she abandoned him to finish the evening with a handsome Beauxb��tons student who was actually interested in dancing and entertaining her. She ended up dating him for the rest of the year.    

During the fifth year, she joined the Dumbledore’s Army because she believed it was the right thing to do and that Umbridge’s actions were intolerable. She was also selfishly motivated by wanting to perform well in her OWLs. She believed that they needed to practice before their exam and they were not allowed to do it in class so if she had to break rules, then she would. Being a member of the DA actually made her grow and some people realised that she was not that shallow. She had talents and was not simply Lavender giggling partner. 

She was greatly pained not to be picked to be a member of the Slug Club. It bruised her ego to not be considered special enough. She wished that she could have been part of the elitist gatherings. During that year, after Katie Bell’s attack, her parents wanted to withdraw their daughters from the school. Both girls had to fight and argue to remain in Hogwarts. Parvati was also a bit uncomfortable with Ron and Lavender’s relationship at times. (Gross) public display of affections were too much for her. Although she was furious when they broke up and both best friends could be heard frequently cursing Ron until more dramatic events made his behaviour insignificant.

Seventh year was hell. Parvati hated every second of it. She banded together with Dumbledore’s Army members to protect younger students and resist. She lived day to day until the battle of Hogwarts. She was a pureblood and could have stood by and let the death eaters do their horrible deeds but it was not who she was. Her family had never believed in blood purity and the Patil twins were fighters. They would not watch their peers being tortured or abused. They had to do something about it, even if it cost them greatly. She worried about Dean and her muggleborn friends who had to hide. She also worried about Harry, Hermione and Ron. When the time came, she fought the finale battle.

After the battle of Hogwarts

Losing Padma shattered her. Something broke inside of Parvati. The battle had taken her twin and many friends from her. It also made her a killer. She was lost and aimless. She did not see herself keep on with her life as if the world had not ended. She ditched her plan of opening a divination shop with Lavender. She could not see herself going on with the future she had planed for years. It felt wrong. It was a dark time for everybody and she could not find comfort in any of her friends or her family. They were all so broken. She could not stand the shadow of a life they were all living. 

To escape it all, she put her transfiguration and DA training to use and became a curse-breaker for Gringotts. It was a miracle they recruited her but she guessed that extraordinary times called for exceptions. For a few years, she was constantly travelling and working. It was her way to cope with the trauma. The irony was that she tried to escape the war by entering a career that required her to fight all the time. It was not really a smart move or the best way to recover. However it was all she knew and it had the benefits of taking her away from home. She could not stand seeing the sadness in her parents eyes or wandering in places that reminded her of Padma. It was even hard to look at herself in a mirror and see her sister’s image. She avoided her reflection for years. Nusrat and Prajeet disapproved of her job as they were afraid of losing the only daughter they had left.  Parvati was constantly risking her life. 

She tried to shed everything that used to make her “her”. Her last year of school had already stripped her of her bubbly personality. Losing Padma finished erasing that lively side. War had changed everybody. It was particularly noticeable in people like Parvati. Gone were the giggles and sparkling eyes. At times she missed the girl she used to be. She would give anything to be able to just one more time, sit with Padma and Lavender and laugh about Luna’s radish earrings or roll her eyes at Dean and Seamus being silly in the common room. She tried not to think or dwell about the past because it only hurt. 

However time started to heal her wounds. She would never forget what had happened to her, her sister and her friends but it became easier to live with the trauma. She found herself enjoying her visits back home more than dreading them. During those times, she would visit old friends as what felt like a mandatory task and was bittersweet. Eventually just as she longed for breaks between missions, she realised that she longed for her friends and a kinship. She had been alone for too long and it was time that she tried to live her life again instead of escaping it. 

She recently decided to settle down and quit her job at Gringotts. She needed to try to figure out what to do for the rest of her life. Did she want to go back to her original plan or not ? She could not really decide. George Weasley who like her had lost a twin and was the only person who she felt understood her pain and struggles, kindly offered her a job at his Wizard Wheezes shop. She took it knowing that working in a joke and tricks shop would not be boring and that George and her could support each others. 

Parvati did not join the Order of Phoenix as she wanted nothing to do with wars anymore. She had had enough. She remained a member of the Dumbledore’s Army but was not actively participating in anything. She simply promised to be there if another battle happened. 

Summary

I kept everything book canon until the battle of Hogwarts. Padma’s death broke Parvati. She abandoned her plans of opening a divination shop. She shut people down and left to become a curse-breaker to escape her pain and trauma. For years she rarely visited home and kept very little contact with her friends. Time healed her a little. She recently came back to the UK and decided to try and live a peaceful life. George Weasley offered her a job at Weasley Wizard Wheezes. She wishes to reconnect with her friends or make new ones. She is still a member of the Dumbledore Army but not an active one. 

Abilities

Working as a curse breaker made Parvati a better witch and she continued to develop her magic and abilities. She has plenty of spells in her sleeves. She is now able to cast a corporeal patronus. 

Wanted connections

Perhaps someone who tried to be there for Parvati but she shut them down and was not really responsive to the friendship and support given to her 

Other curse-breakers 

Flings (Parvati was not in a head space to date but she could have had flings here and there while she was back home)

Former Beauxbâtons boyfriend ?? (i don’t know if anyone is an alumni and fits the age range)

Hogwarts/Gryffindor/DA rekindling friendships. Seriously my girl was like bye everyone and only sporadically came home for years. She feels super guilty of abandoning her friends to go on her own journey. And she wants to make amends and rebuild relationships. She also feel bad for how she treated Luna and Hermione at times when they were in school. 

Perhaps a new friend she made recently

Someone she does not vibe with

Someone she was not friend with in school but they are seeing each others in a new light ? 

Cousin ? If anyone has indian or part indian character we could try to work something 

Former Hogwarts boyfriend(s). We know nothing in canon about Parvati’s love life but it’s easy to speculate that she dated a few people. 

Enemies from Hogwarts that remained enemies 

Perhaps someone who had an unrequited crush on her at school ? 

[disasterhumans]

What are your thoughts on Keyleth’s grieving style?

Oh man, I don’t have fully formulated Thoughts, and it’s been several months since I finished c1, but here are some quick and dirty takes wild ramblings (nothing I've ever written was “quick” why was i trying to fool myself):

I mean I think Keyleth herself summarized her grieving process pretty well: She compartmentalizes. (Vex does too, but it’s different.) In some ways, she may have been happy to immediately Have a Mission after they defeated Vecna. She’s heartbroken, and she misses the love of her life, but Having Something To Do not only provides a great distraction, it also lets her fall into a dynamic she’s familiar with: she’s a bit silly, a bit earnest, and there to take on the role as Tank to protect her remaining friends. She turns into an earth elemental and makes silly gesticulations. Vox Machina is down two members, but she still knows where and how she fits in their group. Meanwhile, she really doesn’t know how to mourn yet (the other major loss in her life happened when she was a child, and while they’ve lost friends along the way, I think we can safely say Vax was her first capital ‘l’ Loss.), So she falls back on what she knows, and she power through.

She’s super angry. In general I don’t think Keyleth’s capacity for anger is recognized enough. Her anger doesn’t typically express itself in the way we’re used to seeing anger. At times it comes out as righteous indignation rather than actual rage or ire. But as much as Keyleth is scared of what the future of her life may be, she also angry about it. She cares about the world so deeply, and she gets mad at people who wreak havoc and harm. While they go through Pandemonium, her anger seems to rise and fall. She keeps it at bay for stretches at a time, but then a group of bugbears take Percy’s arm, and it’s just another thing on top of all of the things that have happened. She’s powerful enough to bring back Percy’s fucking arm but not strong enough to bring her partner? boyfriend? they never got to a point where he could be her fiance or her husband Vax back. Vax is dead, they’re trudging through Pandemonium to save Grog’s soul, and now Percy’s lost an arm. I’d be fucking pissed too.

But for much of the journey her anger manifests as some Grade A pettiness. She puts on a sweet, almost simpering smile and asks if there’s anyone else who could possibly join them aside from Lieve’tel, a cleric of the being who stole Vax from her. Vax accepted his death, but neither Vex nor Keyleth did. They still think of it as him being robbed. (Because, remember, they had a plan to bring him back. It was a plan that might have cost them time on the fight, and one which may not have worked. But they all had every intention of bringing Vax back themselves after episode 102.) Marisha could very well have played Keyleth as super dour and pessimistic throughout the one-shot–it would have been a valid acting choice and would have been really interesting to see play out. But instead Keyleth is prickly. Keyleth is generally rather nice and polite. But being known as the “nice one,” means that when you really are just angry and bitter at the world, sometimes the only way it can come out is through being viciously catty. (I love it.)

Also Percy ends up serving as a conduit of her anger at various points. I find their friendship dynamic deeply fascinating. They really don’t even need words with each other. I could only vaguely make out what Marisha-as-Keyleth-as-Earth-Elemental was saying, and Percy not only translated it accurately, but did so eloquently on the first try. Percy’s comment to Lieve’tel about the RQ owing a “great debt,” was surely a reflection of Percy’s own feelings about Vax’s loss, but much more than that I think it was him translating for Keyleth what she felt she couldn’t say. I think that Keyleth relies on Percy to essentially be her “anger translator” in a lot of different contexts, but especially now, I think she leans on him pretty heavily in this oneshot to know how she’s feeling without needing to talk about it. There will be time for tears and talking and processing somewhere down the line. For now, having someone who almost instinctively knows what’s going through her head is such a lightening of the load.

And to put a finer point on Percy’s comment to Lieve’tel being an expression Keyleth’s anger and loss: Percy calls the debt one that is “centuries in the making,” which of the face of it seems hyperbolic. But Keyleth (and Scanlan and Pike) will be around for centuries. This is a loss that will literally be felt by some of those closest to Vax for centuries to come. And what’s more Lieve’tel is liable to live for centuries to come as well. 

Anyway, I had a lot of feelings about Keyleth during the one-shot and I’d love to spend more time breaking this down further at some point, but I’ll leave this here for now.

[anthropologicalhands]

2019 fic roundup

tagged by @catty-words!

Total 2019 Word Count: 62,091 Total 2019 Hits: 4714 Other 2019 AO3 Stats: Kudos: 331, Comment Threads: 73, Bookmarks: 42, Subscriptions: 17

Total 2018 Word Count: 91,069 Total 2018 Hits: 3749 Other 2018 AO3 Stats: Kudos: 333, Comment Threads: 46, Bookmarks: 18, Subscriptions: 5

links and titles to 2019 works

[crazy ex girlfriend] my breathing is light and my head is filled silly [28,188] - a collection of r/n prompt fills and miscellaneous oneshots

[crazy ex girlfriend] turns, both solo and ensemble [5,942] - gen and other ceg prompt fills go here

[the godfather] make me an offer i won’t refuse [7,674] - the lone godfather fic i wrote after watching the entire trilogy for the first time. plays with the idea that there was a period of give-and-take between kay and michael after he goes to see her at her school.

[crazy ex girlfriend] sunlight and salutations [1,781] - a valencia character study & valencia/beth get together fic!

[crazy ex girlfriend] josh reaches out! [1,692] - a pre-4B ficlet about josh trying to do right by greg by making the first move. also the first in a highly-theoretical greg/josh road trip au.

[crazy ex girlfriend] roses (a reprise) [1,318] - a post-4x11 au where rebecca goes to visit nathaniel post-confrontation with his father and involves platonic roses.

[crazy ex girlfriend] slow down, follow up [3,139] - post-4x13 where rebecca follows up with nathaniel about her behavior in 4x12.

[naruto] choose your path [16,195] - a naruto/mass effect fusion au that i decided to finish off once and for all with a more condensed second part.

[crazy ex girlfriend] forest for the trees [1,203] - a valencia/heather valentine’s day ficlet written for @catty-words‘s femslash february challenge.

[crazy ex girlfriend] a pattern cutting [3,321] - a play off of the r/n flash forward from 4x17, because while i don’t personally think of r/n as having children, there are actually some interesting things about the concept i really like.

[crazy ex girlfriend] life’s not painless, but he’s not brainless (josh chan will be all right) [11,400] - my love letter to josh chan, post-4x16

[crazy ex girlfriend] (self) imposed limits [2,162] - an extension of the r/n date, due to rebecca wanting to run away from the emotional crisis the 4x16 plot has landed her in.

[crazy ex girlfriend] impressionism (what completes this picture of me and you) [2,969] - valencia admits to having had a crush on heather. set during the eight-month time skip.

[crazy ex girlfriend] greg has feelings for josh?! [4,485] - greg has a minor meltdown about his crush on josh and calls whijo for backup. part two in the highly-theoretical greg/josh road trip universe.

Favorite Fic: life’s not painless, because as a fic, the final form ended up being very close to what i pictured in my head in tone and resolution, plus it really helped me sooth my own frustrations about josh’s resolution in the show.

Hardest Fic: life’s not painless because i really really wanted to get it right, but also everything. writing is very, very hard.

Do you plan to take prompts in 2020? probably, but i have several of my own ideas i want to work on first, plus finishing off the prompts currently in my inbox.

What was the best thing about 2019? i got a lot more comfortable writing in the CEG verse, which has encouraged me to stretch my limits more and try new things, and sometimes those new things have turned out well, so I’m really happy about that. plus, being part of this little subset of fandom is just really fun and nice and encouraging. it’s been a good year to talk to people and complain about the show/gush about the show/bat ridiculous headcanons back and forth.

What was the worst thing about 2019? the worst thing about 2019 is that i have not yet started posting telepathy au because i’m still not satisfied with it. on a petty note, it annoys me that i can’t include it because my word count severely under-represents how much i actually wrote this year. plus, i was really hoping to get it out in the final third of the year, but then job + my own perfectionism got in the way. actually, the perfectionism in general has really slowed me down for both writing and posting. hopefully it’s just growing pains? but we’ll see.

Any last thoughts for 2019? it’s been a strange but fundamentally good year. loved talking to all you people and coming up with new outrageous ideas, and hope to keep doing so.

Goals for 2020?

post telepathy au

finish current wips

write more magical realism ceg au, because frankly that’s my happy place

anyone in the r/n fandom who hasn’t done this yet, consider yourself tagged.

[artemis-entreri]

[[ This post contains Part 4 of my review/analysis of the Forgotten Realms/Drizzt novel, Boundless, by R. A. Salvatore. As such, the entirety of this post’s content is OOC. ]]

Genre: Fantasy

Series: Generations: Book 2 | Legend of Drizzt #35 (#32 if not counting The Sellswords)

Publisher: Harper Collins (September 10, 2019)

My Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

Additional Information: Artwork for the cover of Boundless and used above is originally done by Aleks Melnik. This post CONTAINS SPOILERS. Furthermore, this discussion concerns topics that I am very passionate about, and as such, at times I do use strong language. Read and expand the cut at your own discretion.

Contents:

Introduction

I. Positives   I.1 Pure Positives   I.2 Muddled Positives

II. Mediocre Writing Style   II.1 Bad Descriptions   II.2 Salvatorisms   II.3 Laborious “Action”

III. Poor Characterization   III.1 “Maestro”   III.2 Lieutenant   III.3 Barbarian   III.4 “Hero”   III.5 Mother

IV. World Breaks (you are here)   IV.1 Blinders Against the Greater World   IV.2 Befuddlement of Earth and Toril   IV.3 Self-Inconsistency   IV.4 Dungeon Amateur   IV.5 Utter Nonsense

V. Ego Stroking   V.1 The Ineffable Companions of the Hall   V.2 Me, Myself, and I

VI. Problematic Themes   VI.1 No Homo   VI.2 Disrespect of Women   VI.3 Social-normalization   VI.4 Eugenics

VII. What’s Next   VII.1 Drizzt Ascends to Godhood   VII.2 Profane Redemption   VII.3 Passing the Torch   VII.4 Don’t Notice Me Senpai

World Breaks

There's a reason that Salvatore's dark elf books are more popular than his works in his own settings, and that reason is only partly due to the Drizzt books being around longer. A fair number of people who actively like the Drizzt books don't much care for Salvatore's Demonwars books, and I suspect the reason is that the Drizzt books piggyback off of a greater world built by better creatives. One would think, then, that Salvatore would respect the foundation that has helped lift him to his height, but sadly, the opposite is true. Instead, Salvatore seems chagrined by, even resentful of, the fact that what makes his work in the shared world as popular as it is is the fact that the world is a sum of the efforts of many. Salvatore's earlier books were much better, in part due to his significantly more humble attitude, but also due to a greater care in respecting what others have woven around him. With each new Drizzt book however, it seems Salvatore is puffing out his chest more, intent on writing his name in a giant sharpie over the tapestry that many hands painstakingly wove together before. The Forgotten Realms may not have some facets as developed as other fantasy worlds like Middle-Earth, but nonetheless, even while missing complete languages, FR has enough self-consistency to at least maintain the feel of the whole. With each new book however, Salvatore turns his nose up at the Realms a new degree. Even if a reader doesn't care about the world outside of Salvatore's take on it, I would hope that they're reasonable enough to see how disrespectful and petty it is to disregard and, at times, erase the work done by others in that same setting, especially when even the creator of the world himself is not exempt from this treatment. 

Blinders Against the Greater World

Salvatore's corner of the Realms has always been very insular, but Boundless takes ignoring of the wider world to a whole new level. To Salvatore, it is as though all there is to the Realms is Faer��n. The planet that is Toril has been reduced to a single continent. Even the great Gromph Baenre, whom Salvatore has fought to elevate to the levels of Blackstaff if not Elminster, doesn't seem aware that the planet is round. When Gromph tells Penelope Harpell to take Catti-brie far away from danger, he states, "send her away, far away, to the ends of Faerun, to another plane, even." This presentation is as silly as the flat earth theory of our world, perhaps more so, because to put it in perspective, if this happened in our world, Gromph basically said something alone the lines of, "take her to the ends of North America, to another dimension, even," when he meant, "take her to the ends of the earth". So, again, there are two possibilities here: one, that Gromph isn't as great as he's made out to seem and actually believes that all of his world is the continent of Faerûn, or two, Salvatore is working very hard to erase the rest of a world that he has no use for. Both possibilities are equally bad.

I think that Salvatore's hubris prevents him from fact-checking, even when it is exceedingly easy for him to do so. Ed Greenwood routinely answers questions from fans about the Realms, only holding back when something is blocked by non-disclosure agreements. Salvatore would be spared that block, and it would be a simple matter for him to just ask Greenwood through the myriad of available instant messaging methods and ask for a quick fact check. It's very evident that he doesn't, however, nor even so much as bother Googling something like "map of Waterdeep", as is evidenced by his incorrect nomenclature of one of the city's wards. Entreri and Dahlia have made their home in the Southern Ward of the city, but Salvatore calls it the "South Ward", despite every map of Waterdeep throughout the editions specifically labeling it as "Southern Ward". Even in the recent D&D module, Waterdeep: Dragon Heist, Volo's Enchiridion notes that, "It is called the Southern Ward, not the South Ward. Waterdhavians are peculiar about this, and if you insist on referring to it as the South Ward, expect to be corrected or thought a fool." I suppose that Salvatore is a fool then, for Dahlia, and most certainly Entreri, wouldn't be foolish enough to erroneously call the area they live in the South Ward, especially since they're performing undercover reconnaissance, which would entail not standing out like a sore thumb as foreigners.

Befuddlement of Earth and Toril

One thing that Salvatore did manage to do better than some Realms authors is that, at least in the past, his dialogue read like speakers in the fantasy world rather than in our world. He's been slipping more and more in the recent books, with Boundless hitting a new low. For instance, Salvatore uses the word "okay", despite it being specifically stated by Ed Greenwood as not existing in Common. The etymology of "okay" is very specific to our world and, just as it's unlikely for Common to have come from Latin, "okay" wouldn't have independently evolved into existence in the Realms. Furthermore, while in Forgotten Realms canon there exist portals connecting different realms in the multiverse, including Earth to Toril, which has allowed for the interchange of language and ideas across worlds, such transmission is rare. Even more unlikely is for an already low probability word making its way into the depths of the Underdark, into a very xenophobic Menzoberranzan, meaning that Jarlaxle actually knowing the word "okay" in past Menzoberranzan is next to impossible. It's lazy writing, Salvatore isn't even trying anymore. The same is true for "salty", which, although is less specific to our world, did come into prominent use in recent times, a fact aligning with Salvatore's usage of it to beg the question of if he's actively trying to dumb down his writing to appeal to a wider audience. 

Unfortunately, Salvatore's regression in staying true to Common isn't limited to individual words. In Boundless, there's a glaring instance of the usage of a phrase that is specific to Earth. Specifically, during one of Entreri's melodramatic monologues, while he ponders all the analogies of death, one of the things he specifically thinks is, "the ring around the rosy". While this isn't an exact replica of a line from a well-known nursery rhyme, knowing Salvatore it was most likely a typo of "rosie" to "rosy". There are several issues with the reference. First, it's evident that Salvatore was referencing the hypothesized morbid nature of the rhyme, when it was believed that it was about the Black Death, with the "ring around the rosie" specifically referring to the swollen red rings around the plague victims' eyes and/or the the black circles that would appear on their bodies. The Black Death is specific to our world, with no indication of anything similar having happened in the Realms. Even if there was a plague similar to the Great Plague, it would be curbed way before it developed into a pandemic in a world with as much magic as exists in the Realms. Thus, it's unlikely that a nursery rhyme would develop, especially as plagues are nasty business, bards and the like would much rather extol heroes and heroic deeds. Second, it'd always been weird that a children's song would be so dark, but it was recently disproven that the rhyme is about the Black Death at all. The plague explanation was one concocted a long time after the appearance of a rhyme with no definite origin, and while a number of different theories exist for the meaning of "ring around the rosie", folklorists pointed out evidence such as the plague explanation not appearing until the mid-twentieth century and the symptoms supposedly described by the rhyme not fitting with those of the Black Death. Perhaps most tellingly, the Black Death interpretation is based on the modern (and usually American English) form of the rhyme, which is not the rhyme's original form. This particular phrase that Salvatore uses demonstrates both a world break and a failure in research. 

Another world break also happens in that same monologue, specifically, when Entreri thinks, "No existence... no existence... that, so I learn too late, my only heaven." Salvatore could've easily avoided this instance by using the word "salvation" or "peace" instead of "heaven". As it is, the concept of heaven is unique to the religions of our world. In the Realms, there is no "heaven", unless one is referring to Mount Celestia. After death, souls go to the realm of the deity they worshiped in life, and if an individual didn't worship a deity, their soul would go to the deity whose portfolio most closely aligns with how they lived their life. Those like Entreri  who reject the worship of any deity would've ended up in the Wall of the Faithless, but even that eternity would've been better than that of the cocoon. Since Entreri is defining his eternal peace as nonexistence now that the cocoon has shown him the potential horrors that await him, the Wall of the Faithless should feel pretty welcoming to him. The Wall is by no means a pleasant fate, for one's soul is eternally mortared into it, but neither is it eternal suffering either. However, there's another world break here in that Salvatore doesn't seem to want to acknowledge the Wall of the Faithless' existence. He'd go so far as to create a nonexistent "demon" that will torment those that it deems evil for eternity. The "demon" could actually not be a demon at all, but its human-faced wasp minions certainly don't seem like the kind of critter that would belong to a goodly creature. 

Self-Inconsistency

A consistent problem that occurs in the Drizzt books is the lack of self-consistency. Salvatore often seems to forget and/or mix up which of his characters have done what. This was better in Timeless, but worsened in Boundless again. One example of this that is also a disregard for the shared world as a whole is, "Dab'nay stirred from her deep slumber". Such a simple statement, yet one forgetting something as fundamental as drow having ebony skin. Elves of the Forgotten Realms, which includes drow, don't typically sleep, unless they are extremely injured. Their equivalent of rest is reverie, which they only need half as much of as creatures needing sleep, and it's a state in which they are perfectly lucid. I suppose elves can choose to sleep, but it's illogical that Dab'nay would do so even as comfortable as she feels in that moment. Dab'nay is relatively safe in her hideout, but fundamentally, she is in Menzoberranzan, in the Underdark after all, and there, no place is truly safe. Unless a drow has a death wish, they wouldn't relinquish the advantage afforded them by reverie unless they had no choice, i.e. when they're seriously wounded, which leads me to conclude that Salvatore simply forgot, yet again, that drow don't sleep. It's really a shame, and also somewhat embarrassing, given that one of his more memorable and evocative lines is, "They sat there under the stars and let the Reverie calm them" (The Two Swords). And that's not taking into account the War of the Spider Queen series that he supposedly oversaw, in which reverie is referenced in a non-insignificant way. 

Another example of self-inconsistency in Boundless is:

This is deserving of a John Stewart baffled look. Drizzt, Jarlaxle and Entreri were allowed to walk free from Quenthel's dungeons, but Zaknafein was never there, not during Quenthel's rule anyway. I suppose we don't actually know where Yvonnel the Second brought Zaknafein back from, it is conceivable that she resurrected him in Quenthel's dungeons. However, this is super unlikely, because Yvonnel had already left Menzoberranzan behind by that point with no intention of looking back. 

Yet another inconsistency in Boundless is Guenhwyvar apparently losing one of her oldest abilities, specifically, her capacity to carry others with her to and from the Astral Plane. This ability initially appeared in the first Drizzt book Salvatore wrote, The Crystal Shard, in which Guenhwyvar whisks Regis away to the safety of her home while the final Cryshal-Tirith crumbles about them. She does this again in The Halfling's Gem, stealing Regis away again right as things were getting hot for him in Pasha Pook's guild. In that same book, she later returns to the Prime Material Plane with other astral panthers to obliterate the wererats in the Thieves' Guild. Just the circumstance of Regis going on a joyride through the Astral Plane not once but twice should've led to Drizzt  learning about this particular special and powerful ability of his wondrous companion. However, if for some strange reason Regis was tight-lipped about both of his extraordinary experiences with the panther, the spectacle of a pack of panthers materializing to help the Companions rout their enemies should've definitely drawn enough notice to inspire some question and investigation. It's simply inconceivable that Drizzt wouldn't be aware of Guenhwyvar's ability to transport passengers to the Astral Plane, unless he were so dense as to not notice, or so oblivious as to not wonder. In Boundless, Drizzt demonstrates himself to be either exceedingly forgetful or exceedingly stupid to not think of this most convenient ability of Guenhwyvar's that may have solved the Retriever issue right away. Of course, since what Salvatore "created" isn't a standard Retriever, it’s possible it gained immunity to most everything and incomprehensible cosmic power, but lost its ability to track and travel to other planes?  Perhaps that’s its form of an "itty bitty living space"? Yet, in increasing Salvatore fashion, this inconvenient fact is conveniently forgotten, as even Drizzt's most trusted companion Guenhwyvar isn't immune to being nerfed so that the golden boy is elevated to new levels. After all, if Guenhwyvar simply took Drizzt to the Astral Plane and lost the Retriever that way, how could Salvatore make Drizzt do that awesome discorporating thing at the end of the novel?

Perhaps the biggest recurring issue in the Drizzt books is the arbitrary impermanence of death. Even putting aside the fact that the Companions of the Hall are immune to permanent death, always finding some way to come back even if it entails a hundred-year time jump imposed by D&D's edition change, Salvatore seems to blatantly ignore that the resurrection mechanic exists in the world. Resurrection magic might be difficult to access in remote villages as well as being prohibitively expensive for the common folk, but Drizzt and the companions are far from common folk. Bruenor is one of the wealthiest people on the continent, and the companions have allies in advanced, magic-rich cities such as Silverymoon. This isn't accounting for the fact that even in their midst, Catti-brie should be more than powerful enough to perform one resurrection a day. Pikel, too, is represented to be very powerful, and while he might not be able to resurrect, reincarnating a lost friend in a different form should certainly be within his magic arsenal. Why is none of that being employed to bring back Ambergris when she was slain in Timeless? Why was it not used when Pwent was killed, which would've had the bonus effect of also curing his vampirism? The fact that even the endlessly resourceful Jarlaxle doesn't have some sort of death-defeating spell on hand, even during the Spellplague era, is a gaping hole of an incongruity that'll never be rectified. Putting that aside, Salvatore treats death even more whimsically than Realms authors who do acknowledge resurrection magic in their books. It really feels like Pwent is revealed as not dead due to popular request, whereas Ambergris is killed off to build drama. Similarly, I question if anyone still draws any tension from any members of the Companions being in "mortal danger". It doesn't matter that Drizzt can't escape the relentless Retriever pursuing him, because we know that he's not going to die in any permanent sense, and that everything will work out all right for him. This is perhaps not something that can be laid at Salatore's feet though, as it is intrinsic to most novel series (at least those not written be George R.R. Martin).

Dungeon Amateur

Another thing that's evident from the Drizzt books is that, despite Salvatore styling himself as a D&D expert, his actual understanding of D&D mechanics is very poor. His stats for Drizzt are so laughably optimized that a properly min-maxed character could easily defeat him in one-on-one combat while being as much as ten levels lower than him. However, Drizzt has the thickest plot armor of possibly any fantasy character, so there's no need for Salvatore to understand the game system that his books borrow from and are based in. Still, it's very cringe-worthy to see, especially as with each new book, Salvatore is flagrantly disregarding D&D even more. For instance, in Boundless, Jarlaxle's bag of holding is described as being able to “hold a roomful of goods”. I suppose this is true if it was a pretty small room or if it's a room full of not very heavy goods, because bags of holding can't exceed a capacity of five hundred pounds, and if we're speaking in terms of pure volume, sixty-four cubic feet is the limit. Based on the way that Jarlaxle is pulling forth pouch after pouch full of gold from that bag of holding though, Salvatore makes it sound like he's got a dragon's hoard stored in that magical container. Gold and treasure is heavy, so if Jarlaxle indeed wanted to fit a roomful of goods in his bag of holding, he surely must stock some lightweight junk amidst all of those coins.

The above example admittedly isn't all that bad, especially when considering that since multi-classing into monk, Drizzt's plot armor thickened exponentially, giving him a bevy of awesome new abilities even though his previous awesomeness meant that he's high enough level such that he should only have one level to spend into monk. In Boundless, it seems as though Salvatore is reassigning Drizzt's levels, perhaps taking out those levels in those ranger abilities he never uses and putting them into monk, or perhaps simply by removing the level cap for him. With his sole level in monk, Drizzt kicks a balor in the head for massive damage, even though that one level would've only granted him proficiency in unarmed strikes, an alternate low amount of damage (d4), or the possibility for an extra attack. Yet Drizzt is kicking that balor for the damage of all of his fighter levels, as well as being able to remove poison from himself, an ability that monks don't even have anything similar to until level ten in the form of poison immunity.

At times, Salvatore seems self-conscious about the world and mechanic breaks he performs, and appears to try to make up for them. However, the way that he does so is clumsy and inspires one to facepalm. For instance, a guard "crumples to the floor as if she had been stomped by a tarrasque" after receiving a strike from Dahlia's nunchaku. The tarrasque is a creature that is unique to the Forgotten Realms, however it is also fifty feet long and seventy feet wide, weighing a whopping value of one hundred and thirty tons. Any medium-sized humanoid, which the guard that Dahlia strikes is, would be little more than a bloody smear even if the tarrasque gently put its foot on them. Yet, the guard didn't die immediately from such a strike, was even groaning afterwards. The vast ridiculousness of the analogy aside, it's very unlikely that the guard would be alive at all, for Dahlia's un-tarrasque-like strike nonetheless was enough to splatter the nearby Regis with "blood, bone, and brain". 

In the same vein as not making sense is:

Since when is "what in the Nine Hells" an old dwarven cliché? As far as I can remember, this is the first time it's mentioned in a Drizzt book, and I don't recall seeing that phrase categorized as such in any other Forgotten Realms novels or sourcebooks. It hardly makes sense to and reeks of poor and lazy worldbuilding, While all "facts" in a fantasy setting are made up, this detail is just so random and doesn't fit with dwarf lore. Dwarven souls can end up in the abyss and Baator (the Nine Hells) as readily as any mortal soul, but dwarves as a race don't mingle with devils as much as, for instance, humans or even elves do. As such, it's unlikely that fear of the hells would come from the dwarves. Besides, Bruenor would certainly know the difference between demons and devils, and would thus know that the lawful evil devils would not be marching aside their hated enemies, the chaotic evil demons besieging Gauntylgrm.

One final piece that makes little sense, a tidbit that breaks both D&D rules and Salvatore's own consistency, is Regis lifting Entreri's cocoon. Regis doesn't drag the cocoon, but actually lifts it, gets it on his shoulders, and carries it across a room. Sure, his legs were shaking, but the feat shouldn't have been possible for him at all. We know from Salvatore's own text via The Sellswords trilogy that Entreri weighs one hundred and fifty pounds. Assuming that's with armor included, although it's unlikely since a man that is five foot five inches tall and as muscular as Entreri is would weigh that fully nude, the cocoon itself should add at least fifty pounds, although more likely much more as it's described as being thick and made of sludge-like material. As a halfling, Regis would weigh around thirty pounds, and from what we've seen, he's more of a dexterity-based character than strength-based. He shouldn't have been able to lift the cocoon at all. 

Utter Nonsense

There are a number of things that aren't just inconsistent with the rest of the shared world, they're not even consistent with our world. A carry-over from Timeless is what was supposed to have been a nightmarish fate left to the priestess who failed, Ash'ala Melarn. The climax of the awful punishment was supposedly "when the maggots hatch in the filthy tub all about [her], that [she] can feel every bite and every squirm over the days as they devoured [her]." As I pointed out in my analysis of Timeless, maggots only eat dead flesh. They don't eat live flesh, which is why they can be employed in medical treatments as a form of biotherapy. Because they specifically target dead tissue, maggots are effective in preventing infection that is promoted by the presence of dead tissue. Thus, unless drow possess the capacity to maintain sensation in dead tissue, Ash'ala wouldn't feel the maggots' bites. It seems that Salvatore just kept compounding his mistake, for in Boundless, we're reminded of how Ash'ala is "being slowly eaten by maggots". I suppose that can be true enough if more and more of her tissue is dying and the maggots move on to consume the newly dead tissue, but it's not really a horrific image because, fundamentally, all dead things are going to be eaten by maggots. I get what Salvatore is trying to go for but if the maggots in their world is the same as ours, it wouldn't work the way that he's describing. 

Another example of something that just doesn't fit in either world appears during one of Entreri's monologues: 

I can't find anything for what "piffy" might mean here. There's an entry in the Urban Dictionary that states that it means "sexy", but that definition hardly fits in this context. There's also an explanation that it's a British saying that means to be conspicuous but left out of an activity, but that hardly fits either. Is this Salvatore's version of Trump's covfefe, or a truly epicly bad spelling of pithy that doesn't really fit either? Perhaps its an attempt to show us that language is "Boundless".

[popatochisssp]

How are the boys with memes? Like who keeps up with the freshest memes, who has no clue what they are, and who (heaven forbid) uses Facebook mom memes?

I should be embarrassed by how ready to answer this ask I am. Well anyway, here goes! XD

Meme Fluent: Sans (Undertale), Papyrus (Undertale), Rus (Swapfell Papyrus), Papy (Horrortale Papyrus)

Can At Least Ask Where The Bathroom Is In Meme: Paps (Underswap Papyrus), Jasper (Underfell Sans), Slate (Horrortale Sans)

Meme-blivious: Sky (Underswap Sans), Pyre (Underfell Papyrus), Mal (Swapfell Sans)

And now specifics, because I have those, because I am way too prepared for this and have thought this out in detail with their Top Two favorite genres of meme because I am a meme-loving fuck, myself:

Sans (Undertale): Of course he’s hip to the meme scene. No explanation necessary there, except for the types of memes he’s into. Minions memes? Minions memes. He is a troll and a garbage sort of person, so he both ironically and unironically loves Minions. The cornier and more played out the meme, the more he loves it and shares it with all his family and friends to the point that they start to hate him. He exits way too many text conversations with the gif of Stuart walking to the pool in the little red speedo and everyone is very sick of it. But another thing genuinely loves is those funny product reviews people do of stuff: When somebody leaves a long review on a useless or silly product, that is his jam. His longest running favorite is literally everything posted about sugar-free gummy bears, but whether the review is sarcastic or overly dramatic in tone, he gets a good, long chuckle out of the stuff these people come up with and is at any moment a few hours away from trying his hand at the medium himself.

Papyrus (Undertale): More meme-savvy than you’d expect, but he doesn’t sleep much and most of the stuff he likes to do out of the house have ‘reasonable business hours,’ whatever that means, so the witching hours are his internet time! He’s a blogger at heart, though, and his favorites are WarriorMale and shitty-car-mods-daily– the former because he deeply resonates with the fighting-positive spirit of it, and the latter because they are so wrong and he has so much to say about all those incredible cars!

Sky (Underswap Sans): Doesn’t have much spare time to spend on the internet, so he is almost meme-illiterate, and the ones he does know are usually pretty old. He loves fun and positivity, so any of those image edits about loving and supporting your friends get a smile out of him, and doggo memes crack him the fuck up, every time. Heck, they do him the real big laughter! Bamboozled again!

Paps (Underswap Papyrus): He’s online a decent amount, but definitely not enough to understand every single meme he sees. He gets the gist of the really popular ones and has a tendency to hold onto his favorites a little longer than their shelf-life, but who decides a meme is dead, anyway? He loves The Onion headlines as reaction images, and he never fails to chuckle at a good, old fashioned Cask of Amontillado meme. In fact, he has a whole store of them printed out just to look at later. He keeps them down in the basement, would you like to see them?

Jasper (Underfell Sans): Similar to Paps, he spends some time on the internet, but not that much–he generally figures he has better shit to do, but it’s fun for unwinding a little every now and then. He is The Worst with his memeing, though, because his favorites are engineering fails and uncomfortable images. Mailboxes built in the middle of a driveway and ramps with railings through the middle are hilariously stupid to him, but he also gets a very mean-spirited chuckle out of sending people things like horses with dog-mouths, or a hunk of meat decorated to look like a donut, stuff that’ll make just about anyone go, “Hmm, don’t like that.” If looking at it fills you with discomfort and possibly even anger, he will locate it and send it to you at two in the morning.

Pyre (Underfell Papyrus): Is not even really sure what a meme is. Has way better shit to do in real life, or at least believes that he does, to be online very much at all! That said, he does have a small collection of gifs from all the reality shows and things with Real Housewives in them to use as reaction images because one thing he can really appreciate is the kind of petty, cattiness those ladies get up to and he likes to co-opt it when someone’s giving him attitude over text. Another thing he likes, though he has no idea that it was ever a meme or even meme-adjacent, is the Troubled Birds images– he actually has the physical book, he got it as a gift from Jasper and he’d never admit it but it is genuinely a treasured possession of his. HE IS LOOKING FOR TROUBLE AND IF HE CANNOT FIND IT, HE WILL CREATE IT!

Mal (Swapfell Sans): Actually the worst about memes because he knows what they are, but…well, there’s no other way to put it, he’s the Facebook mom memer, it’s him. He adores wine-mom memes especially, as a wine-drinker himself, but he’s also a huge fan of those ecards with sassy, bitchy messages on them. “I need to stop asking people ‘how stupid can you be?’ They’re taking it as a challenge!” That’s the kind of thing that gets a laugh from him and he always sends it to his brother who just sighs every time he sees one at this point.

Rus (Swapfell Papyrus): Now Rus spends a lot of time on the internet and it shows because probably his favorite sort of meme is what everybody keeps calling a resurgence in dadaist absurdism. Deep-fried images that don’t seem to make any sense, memes with at least twelve layers of meme-history that you need a Level 50 understanding of the internet to get, he loves those, which especially frustrates his brother because he doesn’t understand what Rus is laughing at??? WHAT IS FUNNY ABOUT THIS THING!!! …So naturally, the most confusing and weird ones are Rus’ favorites to send along to make his bro all pissy and confused, revenge for the daily stream of Mom Memes he gets from him. But more for himself, Rus is also subscribed to several channels and blogs that do stim or satisfying videos. They’re calming and…well, satisfying to him, and he likes to watch those whenever he’s stressed out. Frosting ones are probably his favorites, if pressed he might admit he thinks they’re even more satisfying than eating what the frosting’s going onto.

Slate (Horrortale Sans): He’s on the internet plenty! There’s just no guarantee that whatever the latest in meme culture is will stick in his skull from day to day, so he’s not always as up-to-date as he could be. Still, he has a couple of big favorites in the meme trends, and the biggest one is vine compilations! He loves those, vines are short and he doesn’t have the longest short-term memory, but seven seconds is very doable for him. There’s also a lot of repeated vines across compilations, so by virtue of seeing it over and over again, he tends to remember more vines than he forgets, which is awesome! He loves referencing a vine and getting a chuckle of understanding out of someone, it’s been awhile since he’s been able to be on the inside of an inside joke! Another trend he likes is the rating/reviews of stuff, like emojis or animals. The glib tone and nonsensical criteria as to what makes an ideal XYZ is just really funny to him, and since those things usually also come in big, compiled posts, each individual review is short enough to read and move onto the next instead of getting so in-depth into a text-wall that he starts to forget where he started.

Papy (Horrortale Papyrus): Also doesn’t sleep much and spends a lot of his night on the internet! His personal taste in memery is a little mish-mosh though, because his big favorites are the translated Russian cat memes and any blog he can find that posts weird thrift store finds. The cat memes should require no explanation, but as for the thrift store stuff…If ever there exists a picture of an odd and/or utterly bizarre thing that makes you wonder how and why it ever came to exist, he’s both thrilled and delighted by it. He loves quirky and unique stuff and thrift stores are full of it! Seeing all the strange things people stumble upon makes him want to start doing some thrifting in real life to make finds of his own, but he also just loves to see what other people have discovered. He sends the most bafflingly odd ones to his brother… who usually responds with the Look What I Bought vine and the text, “its you.”