#he’s like an asian mom kind of. but yeah like i think this is the one thing i am willing to cede to anti bruce people

[roobylavender]

a random thought but i really am very obsessed with how deeply committed bruce is to his love of people and to the extent that it’s a regular divide between him and talia. not that she is without love, no, hardly so, but love will never come before principle for her in the sense that the principle does stem from love, but from a selfless love, not a selfish one. and i use these two descriptors purely as a means of analyzing perspective, so selfless and selfish not necessarily as moral indicators as they are often used today but merely as expressions of whether you’re acting for the sake of others or for yourself. talia is someone repeatedly acting at expense to herself for the sake of others. she gives her child away, she ends her marriage, she doesn’t say a word about it again for years despite having the chance, she takes on a high level espionage mission without speaking a word to her ex-lover, maybe to protect herself, maybe to protect him. whether those were worthwhile decisions to take is certainly debatable, but she acts near strictly from a perspective of caring about others and the world first. bruce is comparatively a very selfish person. every victim an extension of his own trauma, every grief taken to heart, every desperation for companionship so heavily internalized that he ends up pushing people away bc at some point he can’t bear to take them down under with him in his sorrow. it’s funny that he tries to be the rational voice in a room bc up to a point he is, but he also cares too much about his own personal affairs to be that way consistently

and in light of all of that i am thinking about the conversations he and talia must have in that alternate universe where damian is normal and newly revealed to both of them as a concrete concept in their lives, for bruce as the son he never had and for talia as the son she gave away, come back to them by way of fate. why did you never tell me you didn’t actually miscarry. why did you never tell me you had a son and you gave him away. why did you pretend like it was over when it never was. why did you look me repeatedly in the eyes over the years like there wasn’t something more that was there. when you said you couldn’t talk about it before i boarded a plane back home i held my tongue. when you let yourself be beaten within an inch of your life bc your city was falling to pieces i held my tongue. when my father took the contingency plans you made and used them to turn your friends against you i held my tongue. when i worked for a man who would for all intents and purposes use the knowledge of my relationship with you against you i held my tongue

how can bruce, a person so wrapped up in his love for people, not understand the number of sacrifices that talia has had to make for his own sake. her repeated protection of him, of his sanity, of his sanctity, is simultaneously her greatest crime and her greatest benevolence to him. she carried that grief of loss for years and years bc of how important bruce is to her. and bruce loves her, loves damian, too much to even begin to understand what love means outside of the parameters of his own feelings for them. that is his dilemma writ large wrt people he loves. that he can’t see the extent of what they do for him, bc he loves them too much and doesn’t know how to get out of the sheer grief and possessiveness of it

[gibbyslounge]

HEARTSTOPPERRRRRAHHHHHHH

[specialagentartemis]

thinking more about trigger warnings and. Bluntly, I think except for a couple specific types of things—like a rape scene in a book, or gunshot noises in an audio drama—content warnings are almost impossible to be useful when they come from somebody who doesn’t know you.

I talk about a really good horror movie I saw to my mom, and she asks, “Would I like it?” and I can say, “there’s one pretty bloody and gross scene, and one scene of a chimpanzee attacking somebody but it’s mostly offscreen, and otherwise, it’s mostly suspense and psychological, I think you’d like it.” That’s a content warning. It’s also only really possible because I know my mom and I know what makes her uncomfortable (gore and excessive violence, mostly). I was reading one of the bleakest, most depressing, most unsettling books I’ve read in my life, and chatting about it with a friend, and I said upfront that it’s bleak and upsetting, and also went into the background of the author a little bit—he wrote it as he was in and out of hospitals, dying of cancer. My friend’s dad was at that point in the hospital with cancer. Because I knew that I wanted to contextualize the book if he was considering reading it. A lot of the time when I’m talking about sci-fi books with another friend who reads a lot more of them and faster than I do, they will often let me know, “It developed a really bad straight romance halfway through,” or “the romance arc wasn’t awful but was annoying,” or “I actually didn’t mind the romance in this one.” These can be thought of as content warnings, telling me that kind of content to expect and brace myself so I don’t get disappointed by another stupid romance subplot in a book a otherwise was looking forward to. “It’s got SO much body horror” can either be a warning or a recommendation, depending on who you’re talking to. We trade our assessments of books, and let each other know what we might like and what we won't like. That's super important—and impossible to impersonalize.

Especially when it’s stuff like “yeah it was uncomfortably sexist” or “the author writes Asian people in a really uncomfortable way” or “there’s just random fatphobia consistently throughout” or “one of the magic things in it relies on the idea that love is what makes you human and people who don’t fall in love are monsters” which the author obviously isn’t going to warn for and is going to hurt some people more than others, and some people probably aren’t even going to notice. You kind of have to know somebody before you can assess what they might need to know going into something.

[chaitantei-ao3]

20

“Okay, good to go.” Mac says, spooning a ladle from the skillet on both plates. “So I came across these at the store. Some kind of-” Mac says, “Asian dish.”

Dennis looks at the box label, “Sichuan Chicken?”

“Yeah I thought, well- Dennis would like that kind of thing.”

“Huh. And what made you think that?”

Mac puckers his face, “It sounds exotic?”

“Oh-” Dennis drags a chair by the kitchen counter, “You’ve been thinking about me?”

Mac falters in keeping the plate in front of him and an absurd warmth flutters in the pit of his stomach. 

“I uh- what I mean to say is that uh- I was only thinking about how-”

Dennis rests his elbows on the counter as his knees accidentally bump against Mac’s.

Mac shakes his head, staring down at the food and rubs the rosary around his wrist, “Al-almost forgot to pray!” Clasping his palms together, Mac squeezes his eyes shut. “Good Lord, Bless this bounty. Many thanks for the meal and this… company.”

His shoulders loosen and Mac looks at him, “Amen.”

Dennis lifts a spoon and inspects it, he watches from the corner of his eye as Mac puts his chin on his hands, resting his elbows on the table. “Are you… testing this on me?”

“No!”

“Then what are you waiting for-”

“I thought first you could-”

Dennis looks down on the spoon and sails it right across the table towards Mac’s wide open mouth.

Mac sputters all over the table, “Hey!” Dennis slides his chair behind.

“Hot! So hot!” Mac wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and gulps down half the beer can.

“Sorry…I didn’t know you were going to-” Mac says between taking swigs of his beer, he grabs tissues from the kitchen.

“Well-” Dennis says, spoons some again and blows on it. Mac’s gaze darts from the spoon to Dennis, his forehead creased. “-there have always been tasters-” Dennis brings the spoon close to him and Mac opens his mouth, “-especially hired to make sure that the king’s food is not poisoned.” 

Mac munches thoughtfully. “I’ll do that mm- next time.”

“Close your mouth.”

“Sor-” Mac swallows.

“So. Are you dead yet?”

“I don’t… I don’t think so.”

“And…how’s the taste?” Dennis dips the spoon back to his bowl.

“It’s-” There’s liquid stuck on his lip, Mac licks his bottom lip and flexes his fingers. “A little spicy.” Dennis sees his cheeks are red, sweat on his brow. 

“Spicy? You don’t like it.”

“Oh no. I once drank a bottle of tabasco sauce on a dare.”

“That is ridiculous dude.”

“But this is okay, this is like…mild. Nothing my killer tastebuds can’t handle.”

“This is not encouraging in the least.” Dennis says.

“It’s fine, Dennis. Seriously.”

Dennis looks at him, his tongue darting to lick a drop off the spoon. He watches Mac’s cheeks turn redder, his nails digging on his neck. 

“How-” Mac swallows, “How is it?”

“...Not bad.”

“I wanted to get the best for you.” Mac says.

What was he doing? Dennis thinks, Turning away Mac’s need to serve him. 

“I guess… you’ll just have to try again.”

“I will.” Mac says.

“The store worker said they’re gonna launch-. She-” Mac scratches his chin, “-yeah she was awesome.”

“Pretty?”

Mac makes a non-committal grunt then blinks, shaking his head. “Was! She was!”

“...Alright.”

“Like a total knockout. I was so turned on!”

“...Sure.” Dennis says. “Did you ask her out?”

“Oh yeah! I mean- I was going to but Charlie called me saying that Mrs. Kelly was done with our clothes. So… I had to leave for that uh-reason.”

“...Right.”

“But then-” Mac scratches his chin, “I saw Mom and-oh God, Dennis. She looked so sad! Yeah-” Mac faces him fully, his chest swelling, “I could sense something was very wrong. So I went and asked her but you know how she is, always putting on a brave face.”

“Yeah… that’s the- that’s the one.”

Mac nods, “When we were going to attend Mass, Mrs. Kelly told me that a friend from their church passed two days ago. Mom should have really told me before.” Mac worries his lip, “The funeral’s tomorrow and I’m thinking of attending.” Dennis’s forehead clears, “Again.” Mac looks at him, “I’m so so sorry I couldn’t check-in, Dennis. My phone ran out of battery.”

“I wasn’t… I wasn’t that worried.”

“You weren’t?!”

Dennis shrugs.

“Anyway, right as we were coming back” Mac’s face brightens, “You won’t believe who came to meet Mom!”

Dennis raises his brows, searching his face.

“Dad!”

“Wasn’t he in jail?”

“Nope. Out on parole.” Mac scratches his chin. “Saw him as I was leaving Mom’s home. Of course he was very interested in catching up so I told him everything that’s been going on. About how I’d recorded another tape for the Badass Project-” Mac taps his chin. “How well Paddy’s is doing oh- and how great it’s living with you, how I’d just gone for our weekly grocery shopping.

To which he actually-” Mac scrunches his brows, “asked if it isn’t time a good woman took care of the house.”

“Huh.” Dennis says, staring at his plate. “And… what’d you say?”

“That I was handling it just fine.” Mac crosses his arms on his chest.

“Yeah? And why not let a… good woman handle it?”

“Dennis!” Mac looks at him, “She won’t know you like I do!”

Dennis looks at him, an unexpected chuckle escaping his mouth. “Is that so?”

Mac puts the fork down, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, “I mean I… know this won’t last forever but at least till the time it does. At least for now…” Mac looks in his eyes, “-it feels nice to do these things for you.”

Dennis feels his stomach do a weird somersault.

“It feels nice to-” 

They hear a loud series of knocks.

Read more

[therand0mwriter]

IDOL-Chapitre un

Adrien Agreste/Chat Noir x Male!Idol!reader

When a young American idol and his band tours in France, every one in Adrien's class wants to go. Unfortunately for them, tickets sold out as soon as they were for sale. Fortunately for Adrien, his father was able to get him tickets, but with a cost. Even though theres an underlying reason on why he's going, Adrien decides to take his best friend Nino, and his other two close classmates/friends, Alya and Marinette.

When they all got to the concert and the idol started singing, it mesmerized Adrien, pulling him to the front of the stage. Seeing the idol perform made Adrien feel things he never felt before, and it didn't help when the idol lent down and kissed Adrien's hand. Now that caused quite the ruckus.

"𝐔𝐡, 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐈 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐞 𝐥𝐢��𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐭?"

[Unedited]

[(h/t) = hair type, i.e. curly, wavy, straight, ect.]

[Everyone in the story is 18 or older unless it is specifically said otherwise.]

*Y/N's POV*

"We're going to France!" Your manager, Sheena, just cheered. It was silent in the conference room as you and your band mates took this in. "Huh?" Was all you could say. "What do you mean: 'huh'?! You guys are going to tour in France! Be more excited!" Sheena yelled at us while shaking her fists.

"Are we that popular to be touring in a different country?" Your bass player, Jiraiya, questioned. "Oh boy, I don't know any french..." Your drummer, Loyal, worried out loud. "Relax, I'm sure this'll be a fun, new experience for all of us." Your guitarist, Kylian, said as he patted Loyal's shoulder in comfort. "Ah, I can't wait for the food!" Your keyboardist, Kairo, was already drooling at the thought of French cuisine.

These are your bandmates. You five, including yourself, make up the band: Ensnare. There was you, Y/N L/N, age 18, 5'9", the leader and vocalist. Then there was Jiraiya Duran, age 19, second in command and the bass player. Jiraiya is of Asian and pacific islander descent, around 5'8", has straight black hair, sharp dark brown eyes, glasses, tan skin, a Medusa lip piercing, sharp features and a slim but fit figure. You honestly think he could become a model if he wanted to. You could call Jiraiya the cool but serious type.

Next is Kylian Thatcher, age 18 and the guitarist of the group. Kylian is of European descent, 5'7", has wavy light brown hair, blue eyes, peach colored skin, dolphin bites lip piercings and a sharp jawline, giving Jiraiya a run for his money. He's definitely the most cocky in the group, constantly butting heads with Jiraiya when you're not around. You could consider him the bad boy out of everyone.

And finally, the twins, Loyal and Kairo Elsher, age 17, mix of European and African descent. Loyal is our drummer while Kairo is our keyboardist. They're identical twins with a height of 5'6", heterochromia eyes (one hazel and one green), light brown skin and a beauty mark under their right eye. They both have curly, colored hair, but their natural black hair is starting to show at the roots. Loyal's hair was dyed blue while Kairo's was dyed orange. The only difference between the two, minus their hair color and their instruments, was their personalities. Loyal was nervous and introverted, Kairo was care-free and extroverted.

Oh, and we can't forget our manager, Sheena Wright, age 40. She is of European descent, 5'6", dyed red hair, blue eyes, freckles, peach colored skin and has multiple ear piercings. Sheena's personality is very outgoing, she's headstrong but determined, she knows when it's time to be serious but also knows when it's time to let loose. In a way, she's kind of like a cool mom to all of us.

"Wait, wait, wait," You started, placing your hand on the table to calm everyone down. "Isn't France notorious now because there's villains constantly running rampant?" "Oh yeah, will we be safe?" Loyal sat up, instantly starting to worry. Sheena waved us off, "Of course you'll be safe! You'll have your bodyguards and Frances hero's."

"'Frances hero's?'" You repeated, not sure if you heard her correctly. "Oh, that's right," Jiraiya started, opening the conference room laptop. He started typing then projected an image of a dark blue haired female in a skin tight, red suit with black polka-dots and a blonde haired male in a skin tight, black cat suit with cat ears on top of his head. "This is Ladybug and Chat Noir, Frances hero's. They're the ones who take care of the villains." Jiraiya explained, pointing to the duo.

You sighed then asked, "When is it?" "It's in six months, you'll be doing the same tour you did earlier this year." Sheena informed. All of your bandmates look to you, their leader, for your decision. "Seems like we need to start learning French." You shrugged. Kairo and Kylian cheered, Loyal got a nervous look and Jiraiya smiled.

*Time Skip, Adrien's POV*

When I entered my class, every one was absolutely buzzing. I went up to Nino, Alya and Marinette as they were huddled together watching something with large smiles. "Whats going on you guys?" I smiled, peeking over Nino's shoulder. Marinette jumped and squeaked at my presence and Nino greeted me, "Hey dude! We're just watching the announcement for Ensnare's France tour!"

"'Ensnare'?" I questioned. "Yeah man," Alya started, smiling. "Ensnare is an American boy band that's totally amazing. Everyone in the group is super talented and not to mention super hot! And they have mentioned some of the best news I have ever heard: they're coming here!" Her and Marinette squealed in excitement. "Here, watch this!" Alya said, pulling up the video they were watching earlier.

On the screen was a... really attractive guy. He seemed to be around our age, but he had a mature air about him. His soft smile, (e/c) eyes, (short/long) lashes, clear (s/c) skin, sharp jawline, and (h/t) (h/c) hair all screamed hot model.

"Depending on when you're seeing this, bonjour or bonsoir République française! This is Ensnare announcing that we will be touring all of France in six months! The tickets will go on sale at 10 in the morning your time, so get them while you can! They're limited! And if you get the VIP tickets we all can't wait to meet you! The VIP tickets include a meet and greet before the concert, a picture with us, and a signed piece of merch! But we are giving out a handful of Deluxe VIP tickets where you get everything a VIP ticket does, but you also get to have dinner with us! The meet and greet will be after the concert though. Remember, premier arrivé premier servi. À bientôt!" The male ended with a smile and a wink.

Ba-bump

'What was that?' I shook my head. "Who was that?" I ask, pointing to the male on the phone. "That's (Y/N) (L/N)! He's the leader and singer of Ensnare! Then there's Jiraiya," Alya excitedly explained, hurriedly moving on to the other members before I could ask more questions about the bands leader. 'Oh well, guess I'll do my own research tonight.' I mentally shrugged to myself as Alya continued to explain every member to me.

"Wow, it seems like you guys really like them. Are you going to their concert?" I questioned, getting pouts from the girls in return. "We're gonna try! That is, if the tickets don't sell out." Marinette answered. "I'm sure you guys will get them!" I encouraged, giving her a smile. Her face immediately turned red and she gained a nervous smile, she started stuttering before Alya stepped in, "Well it's going to be hard since pretty much every one I know is going to try to go to that concert. But we're going to try too!" "I'm sure you'll get them, babe." Nino said, kissing Alya on the cheek.

"Wait, when you say every one you know is going to try to get tickets, does that include our friends?" I ask, referring to the other students around me. "Definitely," Alya sighed. "Well, fingers crossed." I gave Alya and Marinette a comforting smile.

*Time Skip*

"I'm sorry you guys," I tried to comfort my sad friends. "We were so close to going to their concert..." Marinette mumbled. "At least no one else in our class was able to get tickets!" Nino also (poorly) tried to cheer them up. "Still..." Alya sighed in a sad manner. Everyone in our class was bummed out that no one got tickets. And not to mention Chloe who had a temper tantrum when even her dad couldn't get tickets. Even I was a little sad that I couldn't get tickets, I don't know the band very well but I wanted to see that (Y/N) in person... 'Wait, what's up with my thoughts?' I shook my head.

*Time Skip*

I just got home after a photoshoot, heading straight to my room. After I closed my door and made sure Nathalie didn't follow me, I let Plagg out of my shirt. "Gosh! Its about time!" I ignored the kwamis complaint and went to my computer, logging in.

I went to the search engine and typed in: 'Ensnare'. The American boy band popped up and I clicked on the members. "Um... excuse me? I think you're forgetting something." Plagg flew next to me, opening his mouth. I rolled my eyes and tossed him a piece of camembert, successfully quieting him.

I turned my attention back to my monitor and clicked on the bands leader. "Hm... let's see, Y/N L/N, age 18, Ensnare's vocalist..." I was mumbling to myself as I read information about him. After a couple minutes I watched some of their music videos and covers. "His vocal range is amazing..." I mumbled to myself again.

"You seem to really be into this guy, you like him or something?" I jumped as I heard a voice in my ear. I turn to see Plagg with a smug look on his face. "W-What? N-No! I just found out about him today!" I explained, confused at my stuttering and racing heart. Plagg flew circles around my head, "Doesn't mean a thing!" He teased in a sing-song tone. "Whatever..." I waved him off.

I saw a thumbnail of a video and it looked like Y/N in an interview. The only thing was, it was titled: 'ENSNARE'S Y/N'S TYPE'. I clicked on it, curious. You could tell the video didn't start at the beginning of the interview with how it was edited.

"So," The interviewer started, "All of your fans want to know: does Y/N L/N have a secret girlfriend?"

Y/N uncomfortably laughed, "I'm not going to lie, I wasn't expecting this question."

The interviewer laughed, "C'mon! Every one wants to know!"

"Fine, fine. No, I do not."

"Wow! Really?! Why not?!"

"Haven't met the right person yet."

"Can we at least ask who your type is?"

Y/N was quiet for a bit, thinking. But he finally smirked, "Blondes."

Ba-bump

"Blondes? Like me?" I unconsciously said, making Plagg snicker in amusement.

*Time Skip*

I was eating dinner by myself in the dining room, picking at my food. "Adrien," Nathalie called out to me, "Are you alright? You seem to be thinking about something." I blushed and waved her off, "O-Oh, yeah, I'm fine." It looked like she wanted to say more, but left it at that.

In fact, I was thinking about something. More accurately, someone. I couldn't get his face or voice out of my mind! 'Y/N L/N... what are you doing to me?'

"Adrien," I look up to see the owner of the deep voice. "Father!" I stand up from my seat, pleasantly surprised and confused. "I don't have much time, but have you heard of the American band: Ensnare?" He got straight to the point. "U-Um, yeah." I answered.

"I have 4 Deluxe VIP tickets to their concert in six months, I want you to go."

"Really?!"

"There's a catch. I want you to befriend them and convince them to collaborate with me for a new fashion line. I've asked them multiple times myself, but they keep turning me down. So, go to the concert, befriend them, and convince them. If you fail, I'll be disappointed."

"...Yes, father."

"...You can give the 3 extra tickets to your friends if you would like."

"Thank you, father!"

He nodded at me and walked out. I was excited but nervous at the same time. Me and a few of my friends get to go to Ensnare's concert! But... if I can't convince them to collab with my father he'll be upset. 'One step at a time, Adrien!'

*Time Skip*

"AHHH!" Alya and Marinette screamed in excitement. "I can't believe you're taking us to see Ensnare!" Alya shouted, large smile on her face. "This is amazing! Thank you so much, Adrien!" Marinette also shouted. "Yeah man, we all really appreciate it!" Nino added, patting my shoulder. All I could do was laugh at their reactions, "It's no problem, you guys are my best friends, of course I'll take you!"

...

"Did you guys hear that?" I asked, after hearing a faint scream. Alya and Marinette snickered to themselves, "I think Chloe is a little upset you didn't ask her to go to the concert." I frowned and shrugged, "If I had an extra ticket I would."

[satansapostle6]

Angel With A Broken Wing | Jonah Simms

And if I may just take your breath away / I don't mind if there's not much to say / Sometimes the silence guides a mind / To move to a place so far away / The goosebumps start to raise / The minute that my left hand meets your waist / And then I watch your face / Put my finger on your tongue 'cause you love to taste, yeah / These hearts adore, everyone the other beats hardest for / Inside this place is warm / Outside it starts to pour

Warnings: Mature language and themes. Sexual content.

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven: Like Dylan In The Movies

Things were going better. Marcus barely talked to me anymore, which was a good thing, and Ryan and I were back to normal, just worried about Gigi and ourselves. I had things going for me. I had work, and I had Game of Thrones nights and stuff with Garrett. Game of Thrones or movie nights with Garrett were my favorites; I didn’t have a lot of friends these days, and with a kid to worry about, I never really made any. Except for Jonah, but that’s also Jonah.

I think he’d have no problem befriending a particularly friendly leaf. Nevertheless, my movie nights with Garrett meant a lot to me, because I could just stop being a mom, or a Cloud 9 employee, for just a minute, as horrible as that might sound. When it’s just me and Garrett, having a few beers and meaningless yet still profound conversations, things feel a lot simpler and more manageable. Of course, those discussions and debates had a tendency to also come up at work.

This particular Wednesday, it started with a typical Cloud 9 distracted morning break room discussion that generally took place between me, Garrett, Jonah, Cheyenne, Mateo, Janet, Marcus, and Dina. Today’s topic? Racism. A hot one.

I don’t really remember how it came about; no one does. No one ever does. But from what I remember, it started out with us all discussing something that had happened to Brett earlier this week, and basically whether it was a hate crime or not. Of course, this collective group didn’t have the best general grasp of what a hate crime was, so our working definition was roughly a racist behavior. Basically, the day before, someone had just decided to buy Brett (Kobashigawa) a bag of rice... Yeah.

So, naturally, the animated group discussion had eventually devolved into a debate about whether or not it was racist to buy a (Japanese) man a bag of rice(for micro aggressively racist reasons) if said man(Brett) took it home and actually ate it afterwards(he technically did). Yeah. As an objectively Asian woman, I had a few thoughts about one that I just kind of kept inside with this group. Jonah kept looking at me throughout the discussion, though, which wasn’t my favorite.

But anyway, it somehow eventually led us to here.

“…Some of the racists employed here actually become more tolerable at work,” Garrett offered dryly. “Kinda like how Myrtle considers the Civil Rights movement when she talks to people here… But then there’s the other… most of them that definitely don’t.”

Jonah frowns, looking at him in confusion. “Who gets more racist at work?”

Garrett makes a face as Marcus shyly raises a hand. “This isn’t a role call!”

I just shook my head in shame as Marcus, clueless as ever, just put his hand down as everyone just tried to look past it at that point.

“Getting more racist at work actually doesn’t have any foreseeable benefit to it. As someone who works in loss prevention, I actually find that racial profiling is the least effective form of profiling,” Dina offered.

Janet and Mateo seemed to particularly agree with this point.

I just nodded. “Thanks, Dina.”

She gave me a smile. “You’re welcome.”

“Actually,” Garrett turned to Jonah, “You get more racist at work.”

“What?!” Jonah spun around in his chair. “How do I get racist, let alone more racist, at work?!”

Jonah was immediately sent into a white panic while Garett, of course, was more than happy to help.

“Okay, see, it’s not that you’re a racist person, you’re not, actually, in fact, I think you’re a little too ‘woke’ for me, even,” Garrett expanded, “Honestly… Wish you were more racist sometimes, it’d definitely make watching movies a little more fun…” he got lost on a tangent.

Jonah frowned, looking troubled and confused, but Mateo, Cheyenne, and Janet also seemed to be able to empathize with this particular point.

“…Anyways. You are not racist, but given your usual stats, your upward trends do kinda tend to take place here, as far as your awkward slips and weird interactions,” Garrett concluded, “Although… That’s not necessarily a reflection of you as a person, that’s really more the general vibe of this place…”

“What?” Jonah laughed nervously. “That’s ridiculous. I do not get more racist, or just racist, at work…”

There was a collective “Yeah, you do.”

“What?” Jonah spluttered, flabbergasted as he looked all around the room. “When have I ever been racist at work?!”

“You assumed that Taiwanese guy was Chinese last week,” Dina provided.

“That’s different!” Jonah corrected her, “I thought he said Chinese, it was a mixup, and I apologized…”

“I was telling Glenn why I don’t call it Ho Chi Minh City, and you cut me off, and explained it for me,” I added, “And then proceeded to mansplain it for me.”

“Ugh!” Marcus yelled, indirectly at me, “Enough with this whole ‘mansplaining’ thing!”

“Yeah,” one of the other women in the break room agreed, “It’s not a crime for a man to just explain something—”

“No,” Marcus shook his head, “Women think men explain things to women that don’t need to be explained just because of some sense of superiority—”

“Okay,” Garrett interjected, talking to me, “That was just an instance of him being annoying, not necessarily racist.”

Dina nodded in agreement. “It’s true, a lot of autistic children do the same—”

“Nope!” Garrett shook his head, not encouraging this branch off of the conversation.

I just nodded appreciatively at the scene going on around me as Jonah immediately got defensive.

“I’m not annoying—!” Jonah began, before immediately putting his head down and abandoning the sentence.

“Do you just hate Asian people, Jonah?” Mateo asked, for the sole purpose of instigating.

“Yeah,” Cheyenne looked him up and down, “Should we hide our cats from you?”

Garrett and I both exchanged contained wide-eyed glances before Mateo could frustratedly correct her.

“No, Cheyenne, that’s not—”

We all decided to continue to provide examples of Jonah’s occasional racial faux pas, not because we thought he was inherently deserving of criticism or correction, but just because it was fun.

“You gave me an unprompted review on To Pimp A Butterfly,” Garrett reminded him.

“Be-Because it’s a masterpiece!” Jonah exclaimed defensively.

“Again,” Dina decided to try and facilitate, “Not a point to racism, more of just a point to autism.”

Jonah was again flabbergasted. “Guys, I don’t have autism, where are you getting this rhetoric from—”

“Actually, there’s a pool going in the warehouse,” Marcus shared, as we all kind of went quiet.

“…But it doesn’t even matter if an individual is particularly racist at work,” Dina chimed in, “It’s really about who their respective cliques are.”

Garrett, Mateo, Cheyenne, Janet, Marcus, and I all seemed to agree on this one as Jonah seemed more confused than ever.

“What?!” he exclaimed. “How does that—”

“Simple,” Garrett stated, “Everyone has a racism type. You’re either racist, woke, or neutral, and then a joker, campaigner, or neutral.”

This was, somehow, a revolutionary concept for the group. Garrett and I had come up with it weeks ago. Everyone except Jonah somehow seemed to be able to grasp the concept.

“What…does that even mean?” he stared in awe.

Garrett easily explained. “Simple. Everyone falls somewhere on the racism scale, but how that interacts with society also depends on their social tendencies… Like, say, me, Sophie, Dina, Mateo, and Cheyenne? We’re all woke-neutral, which is between woke and neutral, which seems simple enough, but we’re also jokers… one way or another… and that kinda affects the wokeness a little, but not offsetting it; we’re woke-neutral jokers,” Garrett concluded.

“And what am I?” Jonah questioned.

“You’re a woke campaigner,” Garrett stated, “You’re woke, and you’re very serious about it; but somehow, that gives you about the same potential for racism as our group, but not as much as Marcus, who’s just a racist joker-campaigner.”

“I’m a racist joker-campaigner?” Marcus questioned.

“Yes, but you’re generally harmless, because you don’t actually know enough of what you’re talking about to actually affect the greater social climate here,” Garrett provided.

“Sweet,” Marcus grinned.

Janet just shook her head.

“And Glenn?” Jonah asked.

“Neutral-racist campaigner. Similar to Marcus, but with better intentions,” Garrett answered.

“And… Elias?” Jonah tried to test the system.

“Neutral-racist joker,” I nodded promptly.

“…Brett?” Jonah tried.

“Oh, same as Elias,” Garrett nodded.

“Really?” Jonah questioned.

“Yeah,” I agreed, “He’s hilarious.”

*****

Then, there was this other conversation that took place, allegedly, not in my presence.

“I think people get more or less racist depending on who their work-spouses are,” Mateo contributed.

“Hundred percent,” Garrett agreed.

“I’m sorry, ‘work spouses’…?” Jonah echoed.

“You know,” Cheyenne provided, “Work wives, work husbands…”

“No, I’m aware of what you meant…” Jonah stated.

“Then why are you talking?” Cheyenne genuinely wondered.

Garrett was thoroughly entertained.

“No…” Jonah tried to explain himself. “How does one have… multiple ‘work-spouses’…?”

Mateo just shrugged, looking Jonah up and down. “How does one afford a wig on a Cloud 9 salary?”

“Okay,” Jonah nodded, “That just felt cheap…”

“Guys, the ‘racist work spouse’ thing is true,” Cheyenne stated, “Me? Not racist. Mateo? Not racist. Me and Mateo? Racist.”

Jonah furrowed his brows in confusion at the whole thing, but did not contest.

“Jonah? Not racist. Garrett? Not racist. Jonah and Garrett…?” Mateo trailed off. “…A little racist.”

Jonah seemed more confused by this than Garrett, who just nodded and accepted it.

“Jackie? Racist. Bill? Not racist. Jackie and Bill? Racist,” Garrett added in agreement.

“Sophie? Not racist. Marcus? Racist. Sophie and Marcus? Not racist,” Cheyenne concluded, as everyone seemed to agree.

This seemed to cause Jonah’s ears to perk up, an immediate, strong reaction.

“Wait, Sophie and Marcus…?” Jonah questioned softly.

“Not now,” Mateo scoffed, “When they were banging.”

“Oh…” Jonah nodded uncomfortably, “Right…”

“Sophie? Not racist. Jonah? Not racist. Sophie and Jonah? …Again, a little racist,” Garrett stated.

By this point, Jonah had forgotten his main reaction to the statement, as he tried to hide his grin spreading from ear to ear during a conversation about racism.

“Oh my God, does Sophie have, like, liberal arts pussy?” Mateo wondered. “Like, is she curing racism?”

Jonah’s smile ultimately as faded as the discussion took yet another turn.

“…I don’t think Sophie went to real college,” Garrett pointed out.

“What’s ’real college’?” Cheyenne asked.

“One with a mascot,” Garrett offered.

“Oh, okay.”

*****

I took my lunch break in the cafe, eating a bunch of mediocre French fries and sipping soda out of a bottle as I watched my YouTube. Jonah sat opposite me, just kind of staring at me after he ate his lunch. This wasn’t exactly unusual for us, he was just kind of big on quality time.

But he was particularly smiley today, for some reason, just kind of observing my daily rituals after we finished our brief conversation about the general clusterfuck state of the world. I frowned as I looked up from my video, seeing Jonah staring at me like Norman Bates.

“…What?” I asked skeptically.

“What are you watching?” Jonah asked curiously.

I stared. “Uh… ‘Hostile Architecture During the Holocaust’…?”

Jonah nodded with a smile. “Cool, cool… I mean. Not cool…”

I just nodded, understanding what he meant.

“Uh… You know, just… Nice. Not nice, like, ‘gah, I love Hitler’…”

An old woman gave us a strange look as she passed.

“Just nice, like… I know you’re a huge history buff, like I am,” he corrected.

I frowned. “Dude, do you have cancer?”

“What?!” Jonah asked. “No! No, I just…” he shrugged, unable to shake off his smile as he looked around the cafe.

I just looked back down at my YouTube, not really sure what to make of this whole thing.

“I just…” Jonah smiled at me. “I just like sitting here.”

“In the Cloud 9 cafe?” I raised an eyebrow.

“Yes!” he exclaimed, looking around, “It has its charms…”

“Jesus Christ, Dead Poet’s Society,” I muttered under my breath as I went back to my video.

“…And beauty,” Jonah thought to himself pleasantly as he finally stopped searching around the room.

-

Chapter Eight

[meraki-yao]

Another anon but please, share the nicknames🥹 I want cute things after all the chaos it’s been created because of people projecting things

Here are a few cute/fun ones that I know of!

Note 1: I'm bilingual and I'll try my best to translate it but certain things get lost in translation, I'll add the original Chinese text if you want to look up Google Translate or something, and the reason for said nickname

Note 2: A thing in Chinese nicknames is adding the character 小 meaning small/little to the beginning or repeating the same character as a sign of affection, I don't know why that's a thing but it just... kind is and has been for forever

Note 3: They use the nicknames interchangeably between the boys and Firstprince, and this has something to do with how Chinese audiences view shipping, especially in queer media which is a topic I do not want to get into right now, it would be a fucking mess.

Alright now that that's out of the way!

Nick/Henry:

王子 Prince, self-explanatory

小藍 Little Blue, self-explanatory

小王子 Little Prince, self-explanatory

貓貓/小貓 Kitty, in East Asian Culture people assign the two people in a ship as a cat or a dog, they think he's a golden British shorthair

小肥鵝 ... Chubby Little Goose. Yes, it's weird af but it got popular after a reaction video repeatedly referred to Henry as that. Two reasons: 1, Henry/Nick with kiss-swollen lips, specifically in the Paris scene reminded them of a ... goose... for some reason...? 2, um, uh, so there is a common dish in Chinese cuisine called 燒鵝 Roasted goose, and the first character 燒 （shāo）is nearly homophonic with the character for .... horny/flirtatious 騷 (sāo)... so given that scene...yeah go figure. I've seen literal fan art and fan merch of Henry as a goose. It's weird but hilarious to me.

甜心 sweetheart, fairly self-explanatory although the actual meaning it carries is close to "babygirl"

寶寶 baby, as in literal child, in fact my mom calls me that

老婆 wife, um, China, or actually as far as I know East Asians tend to feminize the bottom of a queer relationship and they're oddly persistent on positions which... all I can say is it's a cultural difference thing that doesn't have any disrespectful or harmful intentions but yeah

公主 Princess, same as above

媽媽/媽咪 Mommy ... yeah I'm gonna leave that there

Taylor/Alex:

第一公子 First son (第一 means first, 公子(gōngzǐ) is the phrase referring to a gentleman in ancient Chinese, more specifically sons of noblemen, if you watch costume c dramas you probably hear it a lot) most of the time they just use 公子 though

小紅 Little Red, Self-explanatory

太陽花 Sunflower, a simile for his fucking eyelashes

狗���/小狗 Puppy, same explanation as Kitty, in particular, they think he's a Berner Sennenhund

美狗魚 merpuppy, like a mermaid, but a puppy, mostly due to how fucking beautiful and handsome he looks in the lake scene

老公 husband, same explanation as wife, just the opposite/ complimentary

爸爸/爸比 Daddy, yeah not gonna elaborate on that one either

Chinese fandoms, or honestly, East Asian fandoms tend to be a toxic mess (think about how notoriously toxic the reputation of k pop stans are) which is why I prefer sticking to the Western side the vast majority of the times I'm in fandoms such as RWRB, but there are some beautiful things in the midst of the mess that I occasionally check out.

Anyways yeah! That's a list of nicknames this side of the world gave the boys! I honestly don't know if it's still fun after translation but I hope this was a bit of fun????

[kolachess]

Star Struck - Explaining the conflict and cultural nuance

Those of you who have seen the Korean BL, Star Struck, probably thought it was a(nother) mediocre school BL. In a year with more and more BLs from South Korea (yay!), it might have been an easy pass.

BUT, if you’re like me, you will have really, really appreciated the refreshingly realistic taste of a friends-to-lovers dynamic, complete with a conflict that is not just over one-sided or mutual dislike of each other for once! (Which is not to say I didn’t love the BLs that had that... they’re all great. But I do think expanding scope is always admirable!)

I realized that part of the reason why what seemed to me a rather thoughtfully constructed set of characters and plot development comes across as plain boring to many others might partially be a cultural nuance issue.

So, here’s my attempt to bridge that gap and give it a little more credit than it got (at least, so far). Of course, that’s not to say I think this drama is perfect... I do think a lot of pacing / editing could have done with some improvement. And at the end of the day... it is a coming of age sort of school drama, so it’s not going to be crazy complex. And I’m also writing this after episode 4, so there will be spoilers through episode 4. 

Disclaimer: I am not Korean, nor did I grow up in South Korea, so I definitely do not have complete authority on this subject matter. However, I feel like a lot of what was happening in Star Struck might have been... unfairly overlooked or otherwise not understood by audiences who are less familiar with Eastern Asian cultural values, so as a Chinese American, I wanted to do my best to add a bit of perspective.

So. What is the root of SHJ (Seo Hanjoo) and JYJ (Jo Yoojae)’s conflict?

Certainly, SHJ’s (seemingly) one-sided crush on JYJ and JYJ’s reactive jealousy is a large part of it, but the other big part is a newfound wealth gap and how that translates into what esteem they hold each other in.

From the get-go, we can tell SHJ is very (self-)conscious about money. He knows how hard his mom has to work, and he feels guilty and early on already tries to justify to himself (and others) that some costs, like the cram school he saved up to attend, are not worth it. He’s too prideful to honestly mention his money troubles to anyone.

Although SHJ doesn’t know JYJ’s rich yet in this scene, JYJ’s financial circumstances still was better off than SHJ’s. But he’s clearly uncomfortable with the idea of his best friend paying for him like that. And here’s where I’ll do some cultural breakdown.

In East Asian culture, the collective identity comes first, and the individual comes second. Meaning, people take more pride in what school they graduated from, what company they work for, what their family background is, more so than people in many other cultures. I’m not talking school pride like, ‘I’m proud to be a <insert school mascot>!’ kind of spirit. I mean that everyone in your life, in society, will measure your worth first and foremost (and often only) by the primary institution or family background you came out of. And with SHJ’s sort of background - poor, single-mother - that’s a big stigma. He’s still a rational human being though, so at least he doesn’t blame his poor mother for their circumstance (which some kids do, given all the pressure of society). But that all said, this clearly weighs on him - how his lack of money reflects on him. And if money is viewed at all similarly to how it’s viewed in China... it’s basically a measure of your capabilities and standing in society. The inability to be generous with your money is ‘losing face’ i.e. embarrassing. And so... yeah. It’s a lot of ‘dings’ in SHJ’s social profile. The kid is understandably a bit self-conscious, though he clearly tries to not let it get to him.

Fast forward to when he finds out JYJ is now ‘rich’... Obviously, he’s upset at not being told because they’re supposed to be close friends. However, he’s clearly super self-conscious about being seen as someone who’s that sensitive about money. Notice how he hasn’t actually commented / asked about JYJ ‘moving out’. (Note: I wasn’t 100% sure if this carried the implication that JYJ might be moving away, but the text message made it sound like that? Correct me if I’m wrong.) He immediately assumes JYJ didn’t tell him because he’s pitying him or otherwise worried about how he’d react because of how it involves money. And he hates that. (Which... he’s not totally wrong about. JYJ might not pity him like how SHJ is thinking, but he definitely worries a bit about how SHJ will perceive things, and it becomes this death spiral of misread intentions.)

And of course JYJ starts to comment on SHJ’s family, which just confirms all of JYJ’s worst fears. He suddenly ‘realizes’ that his best friend who he has a crush on actually walks on eggshells around him because of his money situation, which is a blow to his self-esteem, because what does that mean? That there’s a meaningful gap now in their social status and JYJ looks down on him and just never said? That JYJ sees SHJ as too delicate to be able to handle this new reality? (His insecurities and perspectives, not necessarily what JYJ thinks, of course.) 

It’s like having a close friend say something that makes you suddenly wonder if they were actually judging you this whole time, and your mind goes into overdrive analyzing every past interaction you’ve had and reading in between the lines to see if you were actually blind all this time. To SHJ, who is already a bit self-conscious about all of this... it’s a major blow. And although he says he’s only ever felt inconvenienced by his poverty... I’d say he’s being a bit dishonest with himself. Again, he’s clearly not the shameful type to blame his poor mother, but he clearly has trouble admitting his circumstances to even his closest friend.

Meanwhile, for JYJ...

...the guy is clearly struggling too. He obviously cares for SHJ and extremely mindful of his money situation, hence previously wanting to just pay for SHJ at the cafe. However, he also doesn’t want to hurt SHJ’s pride even more, so he ultimately still tosses his pair of perfectly good shoes he no longer wants despite wanting to give it to SHJ.

Once SHJ cools down a bit, and JYJ extends the olive branch, they both apologize to each other and come to an understanding. However, as is with a lot of human emotions... getting over it in the moment does not necessarily mean getting over it for good if you haven’t addressed the inner demons that spawned these bad feelings in the first place. And it’s not long before we see another issue pop up.

At this point, SHJ has had to move into the side house (and hides it from JYJ). He finds the Gucci receipt in the pocket of the jacket JYJ lends him, and JYJ immediately tries to wave it off saying it was pretty much something his mom made him buy.

He’s clearly worried about SHJ feeling bad again. He definitely doesn’t seem to care for the materialistic things as much as his parents seem to, and he even seems a bit embarrassed by it. So when SHJ brings up his big new house, he immediately tries to make light of the situation by joking about how indeed, the one good perk is that he can no longer hear his parents fighting. So that’s clearly another thing that weighs on him. SHJ is seemingly rather sensitive to JYJ’s money situation, but JYJ doesn’t really want anything to do with it at all. And the thing he really wishes could be new and shiny - his family’s relationship - is not something their newfound money could buy. In fact, it’s possible he’s even a little envious of JYJ for having such a caring mom.

Later, when he finds out SHJ has moved into the little side house / shack, he’s understandably upset that his best friend had chosen to hide this from him, that he didn’t see JYJ as understanding enough to be honest with him. He obviously also aches for SHJ’s circumstances. 

Gift-giving is a big part of East Asian culture, but there’s casual gifts between friends, and there’s gifts between everyone else. When you’re gifting gifts to someone less close, you definitely don’t want to go for things too cheap, so people tend to skew for expensive and unnecessary things because it’s part of social gestures and having ‘face’. While well-intentioned, sometimes receiving (and continuing to receive) gifts, especially more expensive ones, can make the receiver feel like they have to reciprocate in kind and continue to stand on ceremony or otherwise have this formal distance between the other person. It’s a big game of chicken sometimes, but some people’s ‘face’ won’t allow them to take a more casual, intimate approach first. This is not the main reason why JYJ gets upset of course, but it is an element.

All that compounded - he’s hurting already on SHJ’s behalf, yet his best friend seemingly doesn’t trust him enough and still tries to save face. And what’s worse, SHJ seems to think JYJ is materialistic and chases expensive things, when that couldn’t be farther from the truth - he dgafs about this kind of stuff. So to have his best friend essentially woefully misunderstand his character, continue to hold him at arm’s length / treat him with non-intimate courtesy, make sacrifices that hurt himself to give JYJ something that makes him seem materialistic and puts even more distance between them due to their economic gap... he’s pretty hurt and furious.

Of course, in reality, while SHJ not telling JYJ might be partly due to his pride, the expensive gift was purely because he was crushing hard. And cue the confession tumbling out.

-

So actually, I feel like there was a wonderful build-up of their tension, oriented not entirely on SHJ’s romantic feelings towards JYJ, but a very real issue between two people compounded by the complexity of romantic feelings.

Although I grew up away from the frontline influence of these sort of social gestures and expectations, it was still a big part of my upbringing. And I feel the agonizing indecisiveness over what to say, how to react, etc. You read intention into every gesture and word, because that’s how Asian culture operations.

I was rather surprised to see people comment that this drama was boring, but upon analysis, I did consider that part of it might be because a lot of this tension goes over the audience’s head if you weren’t brought up in that context. What seems like beautifully nuanced dance of well-intentions-turned-sour might come across as a jumbled mess of ‘being upset over unnecessary secrets’. That, coupled with some abrupt scenes that might not be tied in too smoothly, might have led to a lower evaluation.

Or it’s just my bias for a non-romantic-feelings based tension haha.

-

Anyway... curious what others think!

[wellsinvesting]

💬 Sada

"I don't call her auntie for nothing. She was the only family I had for a while. Sada's always been good to me and she never beat around the bush. I knew what I was getting into when I went into business with her." Yeah her attitude could be shit and Tad didn't always agree with her decisions, but so far the quid pro quo relationship had held tight. "She's scary as shit and I try not to piss her off too much but I don't think she'd ever hurt me or Ria." Not unless he majorly fucked up like he did with his own family. Yeah, if he'd pulled that stunt with Sada she would've strung him by the balls.

"Sometimes I like to tell people she's my mom. Which is really funny-but also sad that people believe it because we're not even the same kind of Asian."

@sadavang

[kobiiioo]

hanpunk and headcanons ⁉️🤯

ok ok so i absolutely need to talk about hanpunk’s first impression because because because

IT’S JUST SO FUNNY HOW THEY THINK SO DIFFERENTLY ABOUT EACH OTHER

WARNING AGAIN BC

just so yk that all the things below are head canons so don’t hate me 😬

lihan’s first impression of hobie:

after going on a mission with him, she literally dislikes him LMFAO

I’M NOT EVEN JK SHE’S HELLA PISSED OF HIM LIKE-

she realizes in that moment that she can’t even stand being in the same room with that guy or she’ll explode, especially due to their differences ; personality, beliefs, way of thinking.. they’re just different in every single way possible.

she’s just like that one scene in atsv where hobie introduces himself amd miles goes “this guy is killing me.” IT’S LITERALLY HER IN THAT MOMENT TOO. SHE HAD THE SAME IMPRESSION OF HOBIE LIKE MILES DID AT FIRST

but it’s nothing about jealousy or anything but just because they’re so different.

she also thinks that at some point, he’s not really responsible since hobie is a guy who likes to do things his way and if it doesn’t go the way he wants it he just won’t do it.

though he’s part of the SS and works under miguel, yall know how pissed miguel was just seeing him; lihan feels the same 💀

she doesn’t specifically hates him ?? she just thinks that they would never really get along and thinking of it, she’s kind of close minded since the universe she lives in is very conservative and close minded as well so she’s not very used with new things and automatically thinks if someone is very different to her, they’ll never get along.

but overall, she just doesn’t want to be associated with him or get involved with him in anything at all, she just doesn’t like him 😭

hobie’s first impression of lihan:

actually,

he had no specific thoughts or any opinion about her 😭

i don’t think he’s the type to really care about what people think about him and he probably isn’t interested in people in the first place, nor does he judge people’s first impression

i kind of feel like he doesn’t really believe in “first impression” things because it’s what your gut tells you about a person but it can turn out to be wrong so he stays neutral abt it ykwim ?

no? okay. 😔

also since this man is just ginormous, he’d literally see anybody smaller than him as cute even when there aren’t much height differences and since he’s tall asf he just loves to take this as an advantage to mess with people.

if you’re smaller than him he’d DEFINITELY make fun of how small you are just because he’s a gigantic twig 😰

so yeah, that’s kinda how he sees lihan when she gets mad at him and starts yelling at him, slapping his back (literally like asian moms idc). he’s just having a blast bc it looks like she’s overreacting/dramatizing.

and after going on that first mission together, he thought he could make her loosen up a bit and be silly as usual since she was all tensed and angry that day, thinking she was just stressed being new at the HQ.

so him actually saying hi and trying to interact with her was actually an act of kindness, so she won’t really feel alone and he could help her adapt here to socialize with other spider people (sobbing so hard rn they are so freaking adorable💔).

but ofc doing that only made her even more angry

and ngl,

he enjoys seeing her like that.

it’s just hilarious to him that when she’s actually mad, she doesn’t do or say anything. she just stays silent and is wayyy calmer than when she’s just pissed and would just walk away from him. the only emotion she really can’t hide is anger. it’s literally written on her face and you can see the anger boiling inside of her which hobie loves to see that because it’s so unlike her to not keep her calm.

anw, he doesn’t really have a strong opinion on her like she has on him.

he’s literally chill with anybody whether they like him or not, he doesn’t get bothered or uncomfortable by that he’s really indifferent to her. (he’s the standard yall.)

the only opinion he has on her is that he definitely finds her funny in general and especially when she gets mad bc he likes to get a reaction out of her and that’s literally it. she’s literally his favorite comedian 😭

alrightieee thats all i just felt the need to talk about them so !! let me be delulu guys 🤭😍🙌🙌

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

i know we talk a lot about toxic zutara shippers who self-insert onto katara because they want to be with zuko & end up mischaracterizing both of them, but there's also a certain brand of zutarians (usually grown men on reddit btw) who self-insert onto zuko because they think he's this cool relatable edgelord & desperately want to be with katara. they are imo even worse than the former type of zutarians.

a lot of them fetishize katara's skin color & indigenous heritage, and view zuko as some kind of white colonizer they can project onto (even though he's not white & the fire nation is based on imperial japan). and the things they say about katara in the context of their ship are honestly disgusting.

it's literally animated reylo for them.

i'm pretty sure most of us wouldn't hate zutara even 25% as much as we do now if their shippers weren't so nasty, rude and annoying.

1 - Yeah, the biggest problem with Zutara has always been the "EVERYONE needs to like this, and they need to do it in the exact way I want them to."

2 - The sheer amount of times I've seen fans, mostly american fans, of ATLA completely ingnore the fact that the characters live in a pan-asian world and thus NOT A SINGLE ONE OF THEM is white should be more than enough for someone to owe me finantial compensation, and I'm still trying to find the person I should sent my formal complaint to.

3 - The amount of, again mostly american, fans that tend to see Katara as "generic indigenous character" instead of having a very clear personality of her own should also be enough for someone to owe me finantial compensation.

4 - Reddit is only not THE worst of the internet because 4chan and Twitter exist. I swear to God, I never got the appeal of either, and somehow the users keep getting worse and worse each year.

5 - Any guy that likes Zuko because they think he's an "edgelord" completely missed the point of the character, mainly that even at his worse he still had a kind heart. These people sound like the type that think they're just like the Joker just because they didn't do the dishes for their mom.

[googoothegodofblood]

Yo I just want to say you're 100% right about the kabru thing you posted recently. I want to add that there's also a racism element, because Kabru is very clearly coded to be fantasy South Asian, and he's a perfectly average height and build for a South Asian man! He's totally normal! Yeah he's a bit beautiful, but is it impossible for a cis man to be beautiful?

So all the stuff that makes Kabru trans because he's shorter and slender basically hinges on the idea that any man that isn't a 6 ft tall Nordic giant like Laios isn't really a man, and that Kabru's natural physical traits as a South Asian man make him unmanly...

It's basically a huge mess. People can do whatever they want, but the huge amount of content like this is absolutely influenced by sexism and racism.

Sorry for the rant! You're right.

Hey thanks for the support haha- i was kind of jumped by a couple dungi meshi heads in the past for expressing my opinion. Its nice to see someone else agree with my point that people just hc him as transgender due to arbitrary "gender roles" or whatever.

Sure you can do whatever you like, but the way i've seen people progressively feminizing him more and more has made me severely dysphoric and uncomftrable. Hooboy, the amount of trans male pregnancy art i've found of him is astonishing.

He is a beautiful man, very average for his ethnicity in height and build, as you said. The trans headcanons hinge on him being petite and beautiful-which MUST mean he was afab right? Thats a bad standard to have of afab bodies.

A lot of cis women struggle to "conform" to "female standards", and yknow my heterosexual ass loves ugly + gnc women so i wrinkle my nose at the thought of women being inherently "tiny femmy subby beautiful always sparkling like a diamond."

Sadly i was born afab, and i am none of those things- so for Kabru (effortlessly beautiful dare i say) to be deemed transgender because of his "effeminate charms" just..eh. Makes me really uncomftrable.

I've seen an argument stating "his mom forced him to wear feminine attire as a baby!" which like...is his mother meant to be potrayed as demented, evil and fucked up for it? if so..that leans into Kabru being cis- i think baby clothes trauma is kinda stupid, but if this is meant to be a plot point and a source of potraying his mother as plain evil..im sorry man but that sounds like a cis man traumatized by a fucked up mom. If he were trans then the objectification would be "normal" (not really, but it'd serve to make his mother look a little bit more sane if the child is afab instead of amab).

SO. Mff im sorry, Kabru is just a gnc guy, its still kind of sad though, it doesnt fix or nullify anything- still have some criticism of his queer coding pertaining to him being gay (masc man x fem man still leans into gender norms, guys) but i randomly decided im heterosexual (not really) , i cant speak on anything outside of the transgenderism.

You do drive home a valid point though. One i feel inclined to agree with.

[cloudslexapro]

Fic: Buddyshipping spice

It's been approximately 84 years since I last posted any fic but I owed @unfriendlyamazon a very specific buddyshipping prompt and I finally did it! Read it here on AO3 or down below! Title: The Sexual Education Of Tristan Taylor

Rating: E

Words: 1,820

Warnings: Blowjobs, first time, bisexuality, guys being dudes

Pairings: Honda Hiroto | Tristan Taylor/Jounouchi Katsuya | Joey Wheeler

Summary: Tristan Taylor is bisexual, and he's finally ready to admit it, but he's never actually been brave enough to watch gay porn. His best friend happens to be a gay porn expert, and offers to take him on a whirlwind tour. What other lessons could Joey have to teach?

Tristan clicked shut both locks on his bedroom door, ignoring Joey’s shitty laugh from where he sat on the bed nearby, scrolling rapidly and clicking around on a laptop. He did feel a little stupid for being this paranoid, but his sister and both parents had the annoying habit of popping up or barging in his room at the most inconvenient and usually humiliating times. Luckily they weren’t supposed to be home for hours, but you could never be too careful when it came to watching porn, especially with your best friend. He walked across the room and twisted shut the blinds. “You wanna make sure the room ain’t wired, too?” Joey groaned and let his head fall back against the wall. “This porn ain’t gonna watch itself.”

“Don’t make me regret telling you.” Tristan folded his arms.

“Okay, okay. I’m sorry, big guy.” Joey sighed and patted the comforter next to him. “You’re a blossoming bisexual flower, and I promised you—”

“I told you not to call me that.”

“And I promised you I would be your gay porn tour guide. Now sit your ass down and help me pick a video.”

Tristan exhaled and crossed over to sit on the bed and scooted back next to Joey. He brushed his palms on his jeans and studied the wall of lewd thumbnails. Dicks, balls and assholes as far as the eye could see. His mom would have a stroke.

“Alright, how about starting with Swallowing My Own Cum?” Joey offered and pointed at the screen.

“Uhh, I don’t think I wanna start there.” Tristan gulped and crossed his arms. His face was already getting hot.

“Yeah, I hear you.” Joey nodded sagely and tucked a lock of blonde behind his ear. “S'kinda like, then where do you have to go?”

“R-right.” Tristan stumbled. “What else is there?”

“Here’s one,” Joey hovered the mouse over a guy ass up on the ground. “Asian Twinks Flip Fuck In The Forest’.”

“What the hell is a flip fuck?” Tristan scratched his temple. “Anyway, I don’t like when they specify they gotta be Asian. Sounds racist.”

“Okaayy, then let’s just do Heteroflexible: Closeted Virgin Gets Passionately Barebacked.” Joey cut his eyes over to Tristan’s blank stare before scrolling away. “Alright, tou-chy. Fine, here’s the winner. Hot And Randy Twink Sucks His Buddy’s Huge Dick.”

“I don’t know, seems kinda—” Tristan started.

“Dude!” Joey shook his hands in frustration. “Are we gonna watch some goddamn porn or not?”

“Fine, just click it. Do it.” Tristan huffed and clamped his mouth shut.

Joey clicked the thumbnail loudly before setting the laptop on the bed and leaning back against the wall with a thump. They watched the production company logo scroll for a few seconds of awkward silence until the screen filled with a shot of two young guys with a lot of piercings and tattoos furiously making out and writhing against each other on a couch. They were  both skinny — really skinny, not Tristan’s usual taste, but the punk look was kinda cool he guessed. Were these the kinds of things guys thought about when they watched gay porn? Probably not. He cleared his throat and watched for a long time as the two dudes played tonsil hockey.

“Is this gonna be the whole thing?” Tristan muttered out of the side of his mouth. “My parents aren’t gonna be gone that long.”

“Shut up, man. It’s picking up.” Joey nodded at the screen.

Sure enough, things were getting heated between the two porn stars. The one with a big tattoo of brass knuckles on his shoulder was obviously taking the lead as he unbuckled the one with the swoopy bangs’ studded belt. The camera drew back to show them both eagerly wriggling out of their skinny jeans and pressing their naked bodies together while they made out more. Their fingers danced across each other’s skin while they rolled their hips in time and panted breathlessly between kisses. Tristan had made out with more than a few girls by now, but even the most heated kiss didn’t match the energy on the tiny laptop screen right now.

“Not gonna lie, a lot of these clips are like half making out ‘cuz they want you to buy a subscription.” Joey’s voice snapped Tristan back to reality. “I can fast forward if you want,”

“No.” Tristan said stiffly. “I mean, uh, I don’t wanna deal with finding another video. This is fine.”

“Cool.” Joey sniffed and went quiet. 

Tattoo Guy finally broke off the kiss and Tristan’s eyes bulged as he watched the man drag his tongue all the way down Swoopy Bangs’ narrow chest to lick his pointed nipples. Tristan noticed immediately that the guy had a tongue piercing and had to wonder how the cold metal would feel against his heated skin. He guessed he could ask Joey, he was the only person he knew crazy enough to get one.

“Finally!” Joey clapped his hands together when Tattoo Guy started jerking and licking Swoopy Bangs’ half-hard dick. “We have liftoff.”

Tristan’s mouth went completely dry. The guy on bottom’s cock hardened up quickly, springing away from his body before the man above him took it in his mouth with an easy bobbing movement. The slurping sounds that filled the room made Tristan’s cheeks light on fire, and that was before the guys started moaning. Gradually and then all too suddenly, Tristan noticed his pants feeling really, really tight. He chanced a look at Joey, but his brown eyes betrayed nothing but casual interest. Tristan’s dick was getting rock hard from five seconds of a couple of twinks giving each other blowies, and Joey looked like he was watching baseball.

“I um, feel like I probably got the gist of it.” Tristan blurted. 

“What, seriously?” Joey raised his eyebrows. “They’re just getting to the good stuff.”

“Yeah, for real, it’s cool. It’s uh, very interesting. But I’m good.” Tristan shifted on the bed uncomfortably. He longed to reach for a pillow to cover his raging boner but that would be a dead giveaway.

“Uh-huuuhh.” Joey’s voice lilted. The moaning on screen got even louder as he eyed the bulging fabric of Tristan’s jeans. “I think you’re doin’ a lil’ more than good.”

“Joey, I know what you’re thinking, and it’s not a good idea.”

“When’s that ever stopped us before?” Joey snorted. He reached over and casually bumped his knuckles along the ridge of Tristan’s hard dick trapped under denim. 

Tristan shuddered, but he didn’t move away. The situation, as usual when it involved Joey, was getting out of his control.

“You want me to stop?” Joey asked, his voice kept husky and low but sounding deafening over the moans and cries coming from the laptop speakers. Tristan shook his head and let out a shaky breath as he leaned back and let his knees fall open.

“Just watch the show, big guy. I got you.” Joey murmured.

Tristan turned his dizzying attention back to the screen while Joey rubbed the front of his pants for a little longer. He quickly moved on to pulling down Tristan’s zipper and he wasted no time getting out his dick to start stroking. He swiped the precum that had already gathered from Tristan’s slit and spread it down his length.

“Fuck, man.” Joey breathed out, puffing air over Tristan’s bare skin. “You got a big ass dick.”

“Y-yeah?” Tristan asked dumbly.

“Yeah, man.” Joey whispered, sounding awed. “The biggest I’ve ever seen.” 

Tristan wondered briefly just how many dicks Joey had actually seen, but the train of thought was lost as his friend licked a long line up and down the underside of his dick. He gasped out loud and looked down in time to catch a silver glint of metal flick out of Joey’s mouth. So that’s what a tongue piercing felt like.

“Fuck,” Tristan hissed.

“That feel good?” Joey asked. His warm brown eyes glanced up coyly, like he didn’t know he was rocking Tristan’s shit right now without even getting his whole dick in his mouth. “Then you’re gonna love this.”

Tristan gasped and let out a truly embarrassing noise when Joey suddenly dropped his hot, wet mouth down his cock. Somewhere next to them the goth twink was overacting his heart out, but the high moans and cries sounded far away as Tristan’s eyes fixed on the real life pornographic sight of his best friend going to town on his hard dick. He watched as Joey’s blonde hair bounced along with the movement of his head bobbing up and down. He expertly sucked on him without a hint of teeth, just soft wet skin taking him impossibly tight and deep. Tentatively, Tristan reached out a hand and curled his fingers in Joey’s hair. Joey’s own hand raised up to clench over Tristan’s and he somehow knew exactly what he needed to do. 

Tristan squeezed and tugged tight on Joey’s bleached strands which pulled the nastiest, thickest moan from his best friend’s throat. Tristan panted and bucked his twitching hips up into Joey’s tight, soft mouth as his pleasure mounted.

“Joey, I gotta stop or I’m gonna—” Tristan groaned, but Joey didn’t stall for a second. “I’m serious, I’m gonna make, hah, I’m gonna make a fucking mess—ahh, fuck!”

Tristan came down Joey’s throat. There were no two ways about it. His best friend had just sucked him into oblivion, and he happily swallowed every drop of come Tristan had to give. Holy shit.

'Holy shit' was the only coherent thought he could form. That, and the fact that Joey was really fucking good at sucking dick. That was one bathroom wall rumor confirmed. 

Joey wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and smiled up at Tristan blearily. They sat in silence for a beat. Tristan’s hand twitched and he reached out to brush a drop of slick that had collected on his friend’s bottom lip. Joey’s smile turned wry and crooked, but the warmth never left his eyes.

“Not half bad doin’ gay shit, huh?” Joey sat up and stretched his arms over head. He reached into his pocket to check his phone and yawned. “Wanna split a pizza?”

Tristan blinked. Leave it to Joey to break years of sexual tension and move on to dinner in the next millisecond.

“Uh, yeah. But we’re getting pineapple.” He declared and started wiping down his crotch with tissues from his bedside table.

“So demanding!” Joey crowed. “Who sucked who’s dick today?”

“You are not holding that over my head from now on!” Tristan jabbed an accusatory finger.

“Pft, if you think I’m annoying now wait ‘til I eat your ass.” Joey rolled his eyes.

Tristan sputtered for a response, but Joey was already on the line with the pizza place before he could think of what to say. He still had a lot to learn.

[theflagscene]

So I was hanging with my parents today because it was my mom’s birthday and it’s a tradition that I make her an over the top omelette for her breakfast, seriously I don’t know when or how it started, I feel like I’ve been doing it for decades lol. Anyway, my dad eventually comes out and he’s having his coffee and my mom and I are talking about books because yes we’re those kind of nerds lol. And my dad pipes up with that he just remembered a dream he had about me, of course I’m extremely uninterested because his dreams about me are usually all the same. He dreams I’ve gotten married or have had a child, etc. The first of which I am not interested in and the second of which I am medically incapable of doing, which he is fully aware of, but I digress. So I’m just like; oh lawd here we go 🙄

But my mother asks him what his dream was about and he says that he dreamt that I had written and I quote a “web book” (he’s 71 and had no idea about how the internet works) that got so popular that one of those “Asian companies that makes your shows” wanted to buy it so it could be turned into a movie or something.

My mother looked at me stunned for a moment and was like; did he just say that he dreamt about you writing a Danmei that got turned into a BL?

And I was like …I think so yeah.

My dad just goes; I don’t know what any of those things you just said are, I just know you write a lot and watch those gay Asian shows, I guess it was in my mind because you guys talk about it so much.

So yeah, that’s how my 71 year old father dreamt about me becoming a Danmei writer that eventually sold my shit to become a live action series. I mean, I don’t even dream about that kind of stuff! Nor did I realize my father even paid any sort of attention to my mother and I when we chat about queer literature (I’m bi, she’s aroace) yet here we are. Lemme tell you, it was a surprising conversation to say the very least, especially when I had only had one coffee lmao!

[waitmyturtles]

Crossing another series off the list this week: we got the finale of Candy Color Paradox/Ameiro Paradox. Thoughts!

I know -- because I am one of them -- that there was vocal concern about the quality of the acting by the leads of Kimura Keito (Onoe) and Yamanaka Jyutaro (Kaburagi). They were definitely the weakest actors of the entire troupe that cast this show. Besides the very obvious Izuka Kenta, who outacted, like, the trees in his outdoor scenes, even the actors who played the guys’ colleagues at their tabloid newspaper demonstratively outperformed the two leads. 

All this being said -- in my past reviews, I admitted to having a weak heart for Onoe and Kaburagi, and I still totally feel that way! I ABSOLUTELY felt like a soccer mom on the sidelines, cheering these two awkward dopes along their journey. I don’t know! I wish I had read the manga for canon background, because I kinda wonder if the awkwardness of their lack of experience, particularly with Kimura’s acting, maybe lent itself an authenticity to the character of Onoe that may have been reflected in the manga?

I have no idea, and I don’t read the forums at MDL, where I believe a lot of this discussion was taking place. But in any case, for me, it was kind of this practice of the guys stumbling around in the first place, figuring out their language together, working individually on their process of confessions, that I honestly loved about this show and the storyline, and it did truly keep me coming back. I really thought their back and forth was sweet.

To me, their miscommunications weren’t as frustrating as, say what went down in Individual Circumstances, where clearly, the storyline would have been solved in a sec if the guys just TALKED. I did say in my review of IC that I happen to appreciate the trope of miscommunication, because I think it’s more relative to Asian cultures than Western viewers might relate to.

But in the case of CCP, I think what I saw in the script was just a simple matter of growth. Kabu needed advice from older and wiser people (maybe not wiser in the case of Izuka’s character, but yadda whatever) to recognize that Onoe’s need was to have simple and direct messages aimed at him. And I thought it was really cute that Kabu challenged Onoe at the end to finally state his (Onoe’s) own feelings into words, which funnily, Onoe hadn’t done the entire series. He himself thought he was communicating clearly -- but they both just needed to SAY THEIR WORDS to seal the deal.

I happened to appreciate the awkward lovey scenes. They were so awkward -- but again, I wonder, was it meant to be that way? Who knows. But that was more heat than I could have expected from this show, AT ALL, so honestly, I appreciate its placement. Onoe’s clearly an awkward dude ANYWAY, so might as well make the love hotel scenes that way.

Final thought (and then one footnote***): I appreciated that the final episode focused solely on the pairing, and not on a case. I loved that. I loved that the script gave the guys 23 minutes to resolve themselves without a distraction. I thought that was compassionate and generous, and a lovely touch.

I wouldn’t HIGHLY recommend this as a must-watch, but if you have the time for something fun and light, with two cuties figuring out EVERRRRRRYTHING, then go for it. I’m glad I watched this one!

***Feel free to skip this, but just wanted to say that it’s clear that Yamanaka���s agency/group (M!LK) and Kimura’s agency (Exile Tribe/LDH-Love Dream Happiness) were trying to make lightning strike twice -- three times in the case of Exile, as Yagi Yusei and Machida Keita have done BL wonders for that agency. I THINK that Yamanaka was M!LK’s first BL actor, but Sano Hayato, the lead for M!LK, is quite a successful actor with significant roles in at least two previous evening doramas (including a non-BL show with Machida). So yeah, I believe the casting for Candy Color Paradox was done to intentionally expand a stable of actors. I just don’t think Yamanaka and Kimura were ready for this script, but I think they did their best.

[funnelcloudd]

My dad was from a little former(?) fucking sundown town in central IL and that side of my family refused to season their food at all. Whenever I went there for holidays I had to eat bland gray slop. My dad couldn’t stand garlic or anything with too much seasoning on it. When he died I remember thinking “well at least we can cook with garlic now” and then feeling like a monster for thinking that. Grief is weird.

Thinking about the weird deviled egg man from Tolono that I worked with on Election Day who’s wife said she “didn’t grow up with mustard.” Not even French’s yellow mustard not even fucking MUSTARD.

My mom’s family (also white) is from the working class south Chicago burbs and they’re the exact inverse of the cold, stilted people on my dad’s side. They’re loud and dramatic and dysfunctional in the opposite way that my dad’s family is dysfunctional. Grandma just kept having kids and couldn’t stop bc no birth control in the 50s and 60s so they were all crammed together in this tiny 3 bedroom Sears kit house and some real Jerry Springer shit went on, but god damn could my grandma cook. Homemade waffles, pancakes, biscuits and gravy. Leg of lamb on Easter studded with cloves of garlic and mint. Fried chicken in a cast iron skillet. I wish I would have asked her for her recipes (the lamb especially) but she’s gone now and I didn’t. Idk if it’s bc the white people up north aren’t as homogenized as they are down here and still retain a sense of cultural identity outside of the vague blob of “whiteness” (a lot of them are still real racist yes I know) or bc my grandma grew up on a farm in southern Indiana which is basically the south but either way the difference is stark.

I grew up and still live downstate but in a diverse college town with a huge East Asian population in particular, a town of 260,000 people where you can throw a rock and hit a really good Chinese or Korean restaurant. There’s places tucked away in strip malls and on campus where nothing is in English and you have to point at shit like a big goofy white idiot but it’s all very good and unlike anything either side of my family ever fed me growing up. I’m lucky to be from this little oasis where I got exposed to other foods and cultures. I kind of want to write a book about university towns in otherwise deeply conservative areas bc I feel like it’s a complicated and interesting subject that hasn’t really been explored that much.

Anyway my feelings toward my downstate home are complex. I get real mad when coastal or Chicago people are dismissive and shitty towards a place they’ve never lived in before but I also recognize that there’s a lot of serious problems here. I’m not gonna discount small towns entirely like some lib asshole bc there’s a lot of cool things and people tucked away in those places, but it’s also like. Yeah.

But I still love a goopy casserole some times or a big pile of chicken and noodles. I’m not above it by any means.