#he walks out with seven new diagnoses

[jadecantcreate]

more krew scribbles: therapy edition

[jetblack4realz]

lake days iv - jake "hangman" seresin x reader

summary - jake is a regular in your household (collection of cute jake moments basically)

warnings - just a very domestic relationship with a lack of a ring which makes you want to scream

word count - 3.4k

pt i , pt ii , pt iii , pt v

______________________________________________________________

as your relationship continued, jake realized very quickly that the worst part of your weekends off was going back to sleep at base. and then waiting around for the better part of the morning before heading to your house to work on the truck you'd just recently bought because you'd been called in to tutor some new pilots or review prep work for an upcoming mission that he'd spent all night finishing.

soon enough, you found yourself coming home to jake over the hood of the truck in your driveway, tools from barrett's garage scattered around as he tirelessly tried to diagnose the issue with the engine.

he walked back into the house for the sixth time that day, grabbing a cup of water and chugging it quickly. "you alright, jake?"

"fine," he answered quickly. "do you have any floodlights?"

you glanced outside, watching the sun set slowly behind the pine trees surrounding your home. "you're not gonna keep working, are you? have you even eaten anything?"

"i've helped myself to a few snacks, but i wanted to figure this thing out before the end of the day," he answered. "i changed the oil and tried to bleed the brakes, but i think something's clogging 'em. i'mma go figure out which-"

"jake, let's just get some take out and rest," you told him, approaching him with a few slick steps. you rested your arms around his torso as you smiled. "why don't you stay the night? you seem tired and i don't want you driving back all by yourself."

"i'll be fine," he insisted.

"okay, let me rephrase: i want you to stay over tonight. will you please?" you asked sweetly, looking up at him with a soft smile. he grinned, pressing a quick kiss to your lips.

"well, sure baby," he said. "anything for you. let me just clean up my things, return the tools to barrett, and then we'll get some food. deal?"

"deal," you nodded.

when you woke up the next morning, you didn't think it would be to your mother calling you. you checked the time with a groan, pulling jake's arm off of your torso as you scooted to the edge of the bed - seven thirty in the morning. you raised your phone to your ear after pressing the little green phone icon.

"what's up, mom?" you asked, your eyes still shut as you waited for a response.

"are you coming to church today?" she asked through the phone.

"what?"

"church, honey. you coming?"

"what time?"

"same as always, 2 o'clock. we've got dinner afterwards too. maybe jake can come! or is he working?"

"no, not today. he's over right now actually."

it was like he knew you were talking about him, reaching over to you with one eye peeked open. you grabbed his hand with a small smile, squeezing it gently.

"bring him to church. he's a church man, ain't he?"

"well, he is from texas, ma." your laugh was tired, but genuine, and it made jake smile as he scooted closer to you.

"bring him. and bring him to dinner after. finn here is dying to see him again."

"you have finn over at yours?"

"he usually runs over here for breakfast. dad buys the sugary cereal brynlee refuses to."

"hmm, sounds like finn."

"i'll see you later, honey. bye-bye, i love you."

"love you too, ma, bye."

you dropped your phone on your nightstand, immediately rolling back into bed and into jake's awaiting arms. you sighed contentedly as he pulled you close, lips to your forehead before settling you against his chest again.

"we going to church?"

"yup."

"i don't have anything to wear."

"call logan."

so, after you two woke up again, at nine this time, he did. finn was all too happy to run a gray polo over to your place, immediately thrusting it into jake's arms and situating himself in your pantry, searching for goodies.

"finn, get out of there," you laughed. "grandma told me all about your cereal run to their house this morning."

"aw man!" he cried, stomping over to where you were laid on the couch and plopping next to you. you pulled him into your side, messing up his hair. "stop!"

"let's watch cars," you said, flicking on your tv and clicking through your streaming services until you found said movie. you knew how obsessed he was with it, and so you were equally surprised when he stopped you.

"let's watch planes," he said. "it's like cars, but planes."

"i don't think i've seen that before," you hummed, but it was in the suggested section below cars, so you clicked on it.

"i love this movie," he told you.

"is it because your cool aunt y/n flies planes?" you teased.

"no, it's because i do," jake said, reentering the room in logan's polo and a clean pair of dark wash jeans. you smiled at him, being obvious as you checked him out, though finn couldn't tell from in front of you.

"well," finn said, dragging the word out for effect. "i mean..."

"no way!" you exclaimed, sitting up quickly and beginning to tickle the boy's sides as he shrieked with laughter. "i'm supposed to be your favorite! i was there when you were born!"

"doesn't make you cooler, y/n," jake said in a sing-songy tone, laughing as finn pushed your hands off to run to him. jake caught him quickly, pulling him up into his arms before throwing him back against the couch. finn sat up quickly, running back to the aviator but jake just leaned over and snatched him up by the legs, holding him upside down.

finn laughed again as jake brought him over to you, carefully laying him across your lap as you tickled his stomach again. "you're so mean to me, finn."

"i'm sorry!" he laughed, pushing your hands away. "you're my favorite!"

"ha! knew it," you said, relinquishing your hold on the child with a smug smile. jake rolled his eyes, scoffing a slight laugh as he joined your side.

"whatever, y/n."

you sent finn back to his family to get him ready for church after the movie wrapped up and you went upstairs to find a dress you thought was suitable for church. you landed on a comfy, ruffly floral midi dress that was ruched at the top with elastic thread to give you some shape. it even had pockets.

you took to the bathroom, pulling out your makeup bag as you turned on some old worship songs you listened to in highschool, appreciating the sense of nostalgia that washed over you. also pulling out your curling iron, you turned it on and began humming to yourself as you wiped some moisturizer onto your cheeks.

you did most of your makeup, only leaving your lashes out as you curled your hair the way you liked it. you were so used to keeping your hair in tight buns that it was so gratifying to be able to style your hair in a cute way - even if you knew it was just going to be back in a bun the next day. you turned off the iron, unplugging it now so you wouldn't freak out later.

"it is well, it is well... with my soul," you sang quietly, curling your lashes as jake walked into the doorway, leaning against it with a small smile. "what?"

"nothing, you're just cute," he said, coming behind you to wrap his arms around you as you continued your makeup routine.

"so are you," you told him with a smile.

"we gotta leave soon. you almost ready?" he asked, kissing your temple.

"just finished," you answered, turning around in his arms to smile at him. "you wanna drive?"

"if it means we don't drive the subaru, then of course," he said, taking your hand and dragging you out, turning off the lights as he went. "let's do this thing!"

"i haven't really been to church much since my first deployment," you told him as you drove to the small building about fifteen minutes away. "just the few times now that i'm back."

"i miss it," he told you, glancing at you with a small smile. "i hated it as a kid, but now i realize that it was actually fun. got to be with my friends and family in a peaceful environment."

you nodded. "i get what you mean. my mom always tried to keep us so involved with coloring pages and small snacks. my grandpa was the preacher, so that helped a bit, but i really just liked coloring."

and when you sat with your family, your two month old new little niece called ella who alice and barrett had been more than happy to let you hold perched on your lap, you realized that your mom still had the same habits.

jake happily accepted a coloring page from everleigh, helping her draw on it over a notebook on his knee. the red crayon he held carefully colored in the sash on Jesus' robe, everleigh scribbling over his hair with the brown.

"looks great, honey," you whispered to him with a smile.

he winked at you, grinning and whispering back, "i'm an excellent crayon artist."

after church, you all returned to your houses to change into comfy clothes and then headed to your parents' house. you and jake elected to walk the ten minutes to their house instead of drive and you took the opportunity to slap his butt as he locked up and you skipped down the driveway.

he laughed loudly, following after you and wrapping his arms around you from behind, keeping you from moving forward. "what was that for?"

"you just look good in your sweats, babe," you told him, turning around and matching his grin before pressing your lips to his.

"you look good in yours too," he hummed against your mouth, pulling away for a moment to just go back in for a shorter, sweet kiss. you laughed, grabbing his hand and stepping backwards.

"come on, mom's got a roast in the crockpot."

family dinner was always really fun for you and was always incredibly special to jake. he appreciated being included and feeling like he was a part of your family - because he really did. he could feel that they all loved him, and he loved them too. he loved being around your brothers and dad the most, though. having grown up with only sisters he craved the camaraderie of brotherhood, something he'd only found on the football team and hoped to get more of in the navy, but only finding it in a few other aviators - namely javi "coyote" lopez and johnny "cash" richards who you spent many nights in the bar and days on the beach with back in hawaii.

and your brothers loved him too.

"i challenge you to a game of speed," logan said to jake as you all finished up your ice cream and brownies. jake grinned.

"game on."

it was intense, but after five rounds, jake had him beat at cards. logan was dramatic as he sighed and traded places with darren, letting the younger boy have a go at beating jake.

but he didn't. and neither did josh. or barrett. or your dad. or kyrie, your mom, alice, or you.

but, brynlee had game, and you all knew it. they tied twice, and as the fifth round carried on, you all watched intensely. jake was quickly running out of cards as brynlee tried to jump into his run, but to no avail. and then suddenly, they were both stuck.

"can't keep going?" you asked. they each had two cards left. they nodded, eying their cards as they grabbed a new card from the side decks. "ready, go!"

it was a 6 and a 3.

brynlee placed a 7 just as jake placed a 2, then jake quickly slapped his 8 on top of her 7 and cheered in victory.

"oh come on!" she exclaimed, sitting back with a frown as her husband high-fived your boyfriend.

"i'm never challenging you to speed again," logan laughed.

you all started to gather your things, wishing your parents a farewell as you all went to your respective vehicles, or in your and jake's case, began to walk. you had your hand clasped in his as you walked down the road, finn yelling "bye!" through the window as they drove by.

"i don't wanna go to work tomorrow," you groaned, leaning into him as your hand dropped from the wave you sent to the five year old.

"me neither," jake sighed. he squeezed your hand. "we've got a debriefing for wednesday's mission. we gotta pre-run it tuesday."

"no, they moved it to tomorrow. and they switched out bambi for fritz."

"why?"

"bambi freaked yesterday while i was over with the new guys. came back from a run all frazzled, quit on the spot."

"what happened?"

"i don't know. cash said they were out on a routine flight when they came across some cuban bogies. freaked out bambi i guess."

"so, we've got fritz?"

"unfortunately," you groaned. "luckily cash is my backseater. wish i had coyote though."

"wish you were my wingman and not stuck with the wso's," he told you.

"i'm still your wingman, just a wingman with an extra mission," you answered.

"if anything i'm your wingman. can't really lock in our targets without cash guiding us in."

"true that."

you walked in silence the rest of the way, you swinging your hands slightly and making jake smile. as soon as you were in the door, you were rushing upstairs to brush your teeth and pass out, knowing you were in for a long week starting the next morning. jake locked up behind you before following your lead.

next thing you know, he's collapsing next to you as you pulled the comforter up to you chin and turning over to snuggle against his chest. you laced a leg in between his, your arm splayed over his torso as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

"this is comfy," he mumbled softly.

"i'mma sleep so well," you hummed, smiling up at him with evident drowsiness in your eyes.

"good. we're gonna need it."

after a very long week and successful, short mission, you were finally back home.

"hey honey," you mumbled, kissing the side of his head as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders from behind. he was sitting criss-cross on the driveway working on switching the crank window of your new old truck to an automatic. he'd completely dissembled the door and was feeding the wiring to the switch he'd installed before you came out. "how's it going?"

"surprisingly well," he answered, turning to give you a quick kiss before returning to his work. "i haven't had a smooth install of these things, well, ever."

"well, i'm glad it's going good," you said, smiling softly. after twisting the wire ends together and slipping a boot over them, he turned to you with slightly knitted brows.

"you need something, darlin'?" he asked. you lowered yourself to the floor next to him, playing with the tools at your feet as he tested the window, it going up and down just as it needed to.

"no, just missed you," you hummed.

"i thought you had to go help curly with the trainees?" he asked, furrowing his brows as he glanced at you again.

"that's where i was this morning, but i'm all done now and i wanna be with you," you said. "you're out here every free second you got."

"i wanna get this finished as soon as possible, baby," he told you, attention back on the window workings. he reached for a screwdriver that you grabbed for him, beginning to return the plastic pieces of the door to their rightful places.

"i know and i appreciate that. i was just wondering if there's anything i could do to help?" you asked, looking to him hopefully.

"well, i'm just about done with this window and then i'll be workin' on the engine," he answered. "it's kind of a one person job, but i'd be happy for some company and a dj."

"i can do that," you said with a grin, pulling your phone out and pressing shuffle on your country playlist titled texas that consisted of mostly luke combs, tim mcgraw, morgan wallen, and dolly parton. "is it the transmission? are we gonna have to replace it?"

"well, after checking it out this morning i don't think so. i think the guy who had it before was just looking at the wrong things - the catalytic converter is clogged and i might replace the spark plugs just for the hell of it to try to keep from replacing or even just rebuilding the whole thing."

"that's good, right? makes things easier."

"a hell of a lot easier."

"and the burning smell when we drove it?"

"i took it over to your dad's to ask about that and he said there's an oil leak. all he did was tighten the drain plug and it's not leaking anymore."

"you went to my dad's?" you asked, smiling slightly as you watched him finish up screwing the door panel in.

"needed some help diagnosing everything. was thinking about bringing it back over when it comes to unclogging the converter - i ain't ever done that before," he said with a shrug. then he looked at you a little more intently, the screwdriver in his hand halting for a moment. "is that okay? do you not want me going to your dad's without you?"

"no, i don't mind at all. i actually like it, that you're comfortable with my family," you told him. he grinned, leaning to kiss you gently on the lips before screwing in the last two screws.

"baby, i think i'm more comfortable with your family than my own at this point," he answered.

you smiled, leaning into his shoulder as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. "while i love that, maybe we should go out and visit your family? i'm sure they'd love to see you."

"ma would for sure, probably not dad," he said, his voice dropping a tone or two.

"why?"

"me and him got in a fight before i left for the academy - nearly ruined my family. have only really spoken to ma since," he answered, mind obviously recalling the events of that convoluted day.

"have you seen your ma since then?" you asked quietly.

"once, at graduation. but, that was three years ago and i've been all over since then. they don't even know i'm back in texas."

you were surprised at how casually he was offering the information, but it looked like he didn't think it was that meaningful, like it was something he could just brush off like he had for the last seven years.

"how about we do what mom offered the first time you came over?" you asked with a smile. "what if we invite them over to our place? a big barbecue. then, it's not all on you and everyone can be out and about, no real awkwardness. we can pull out cornhole and the volleyball net - though it might be all ripped up now that i think about it. anyways, there'll be plenty to do."

"i mean, it's a better idea than me just showing up one day," he mumbled.

"do you have nieces and nephews?" you asked. he nodded.

"a few. don't really know 'em," he said.

"well, if my nieces and nephews are any indicator, then they'll love you," you told him. "and they can play around with the kids. it'll be so fun."

"i'm not sure."

"just think on it. we can wait until the weather gets warm again," you offered. "if we're even still stationed here by then."

"i hope so. i don't wanna leave this baby all by herself," he said, patting the side of the blue truck as you laughed. you kissed his cheek.

"she sure would be lonely without you, babe."

[scotianostra]

Happy 92nd Birthday veteran Scottish actress Phyllida Law, born on May *8th 1932 in Glasgow.

Wiki has 8th July on the first line of their page on Phyllida, but on the side panel has May 8th, so who knows!?

There is very little about her early life except she was born in Glasgow, the daughter of Megsie “Meg” and William Law, a journalist. She said once of he Glasgow upbringing “When you grow up in Glasgow with a Glaswegian granny, you’re taught that pride is a wicked thing. I still feel a bit like that.“ Phyllida grew up in Glasgow’s west end, just off Great Western Road, but war broke out when she was just seven and she found herself evacuated to places such as Lenzie, in Dunbartonshire, and Skelmorlie, Ayrshire.

That gave her a love for the Scots countryside which means she now splits her life between her home in London and a family cottage in Argyll. Phyllida would fit in well with the Scottish & Proud ethos, in an interview she says:

“I’m passionate about my Scots heritage. How could I not be? I can’t live without it. There’s no way I could live without those hills and it’s got to be the west coast. “I sometimes travel to Edinburgh then go up to Pittenweem or somewhere and I think to myself, ‘This isn’t Scotland.’ It’s a wonderful coastline but it’s not Scotland for me.

“When my parents lived in Glasgow they were always looking for a cottage to which they could retire. They found one in Ardentinney, so I visit that a lot.

She joined the Bristol Old Vic in 1952, from what I can gather she was first in the wardrobe department, the first pic shows her standing, from a 1952 photo. Heron screen acting credits start in 1958 and are very extensive, the pick of them are Dixon of Dock Green and a stint as the storyteller in the great children’s show Jackanory in the 60’s. It must have been during her time in the BBC’s children’s TV department she met her husband to be The Magic Roundabout narrator Eric Thompson, She has previously stated that the character of Ermintrude the cow was modelled on her.

Angels in the 70’s and of course Taggart in the 80’s as well Thomson, the variety series hosted by actress Emma Thompson in 1988, Emma just happens to be her daughter. Heartbeat, Hamish Macbeth and Dangerfield in the 90’s, Waking the dead and Doctors in the noughties has kept her busy, now in her 86th year she has still been appearing on the small screen, in The Other Wife and New Tricks during the past 8 years. Film roles include She is known for her work on Much Ado About Nothing , The Time Machine and The Winter Guest.

Phyllida spends most of her time in Argyll in a house she shares with her daughter Emma. who is spending more time looking after her mother, as she was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease in 2915.

Phyllida constantly needs the support of a wheelchair and even assistance when washing due to the effect the condition is having on her.

Due to the progressive nature of the condition, symptoms tend to gradually worsen over time. It is common for individuals to struggle both with walking and talking at the height of the condition.

Phyllida herself spoke about the burdens of looking after an infirm parent, she looked after her mother, Meg who suffered with Alzheimer’s disease. Mego died in 1994 aged 93 after almost 20 years of being cared for by Ms Law at her mother's home in the village of Ardentinny on the west coast, near Dunoon.

Emma said of her mother “Mum is quite lame so it's a case of taking her out in a wheelchair, and making sure she takes her medication. The meds are amazing."

[enby-andi]

I've reblogged a post from a star trek blog and I mentioned this episode of voyager but screw it I wanna talk about this episode because imo it's more fucked up than threshold.

SEASON 5, EPISODE 17: "Course: Oblivion"

The episode starts out really nice!!! There's a wedding going on in the mess hall!!! Tom and B'elanna are getting married!!! Chakotay walks her down the aisle!!! Seven catches the bouquet!!!

After that everything is Same as Always. They are trying something new with the engines. B'elanna is telling Seven what to do while she and Tom are on their honeymoon. She goes to their quarters and IMMEDIATELY gets sick (and not the fanfiction "Congratulations! :)" sick).

Tom finds her and takes her to sickbay. The doctor diagnoses her with cellular degradation due to radiation. The rest of the crew are trying to figure out why. Chakotay and Tuvok are trying to figure out why parts of the ship and replicated food are going bad and immediately disintegrating except for food Neelix has gotten from other stops on the route for the past six months.

And the B'ELANNA FUCKING DIES.

SHE FUCKING DIES WITH TOM CRYING HER NAME AND TELLING THE DOCTOR TO KEEP TRYING AND THE DOCTOR RESIGNEDLY STOPPING REVIVAL ACTIONS.

Tuvok and Chakotay go over all their travel logs and realize something. They go to sickbay where Tom is grieving his FRESHLY DEAD WIFE and tell the Doctor to inject her with a solution.

AND B'ELANNA TURNS INTO A PUDDLE OF MERCURY LOOKING LIQUID.

AS IT TURNS OUT, THIS ENTIRE CREW AND THE VOYAGER SHIP ARE DUPLICATES MADE OF THIS FLUID THAT HAVE ALL THE EXACT SAME MEMORIES AS THE ORIGINALS BUT FORGOT THEY WERE DUPLICATES.

And I'm sure you're asking: Andi, when could this have happened???? It happened in the episode "Demon" ONE WHOLE SEASON AGO IN 4X24. These biomimetic lifeforms (called Silver Blood) from a demon class planet duplicated the entire crew and the ship because they had never encountered human DNA before. Janeway let them because otherwise they couldn't have gotten the dilithium they needed safely.

SO THE ENTIRE CREW AND SHIP ARE DUPLICATES AND ARE SLOWLY DISENTEGRATING AND IT IS HORRIFYING. EVERYONE BEGINS TO LOOK LIKE A CRONENBERG EXTRA. PEOPLE ARE DYING. JC LITERALLY HAVE A MOMENT AND HE FUCKING DIES. JANEWAY GETS THEM OUT OF ONE LAST SPACE CONFRONTATION AND THEN SHE FUCKING DIES IN THE CAPTAIN'S CHAIR. HARRY KIM IS NOW THE CAPTAIN BUT DEAR GOD THE COST AND THE ONLY SENIOR STAFF LEFT ARE SEVEN ANS NEELIX.

After Chakotay dies, Janeway had ordered the crew to try to find the OG Voyager crew so that they can duplicate them again and get a few more months so they can find another demon class planet to survive on. Harry and Seven are pushing the ship to its limits. They can only use impulse, life support, and can barely send out a distress signal. A ship is approaching. Harry braces himself for a confrontation. Something in engineering explodes.

The Ship is the OG Voyager. They got the distress signal. They notice it's gone. They turn on the view screen -

The duplicate Voyager has completely disintegrated into the liquid. The OG Voyager is confused as hell as to what happened here, but make a note of it and move on.

What I found the most fucked up??? After this episode, the viewER HAS NO IDEA IF THE EPISODES BETWEEN "DEMON" AND "C:O" DETAILED THE EVENTS OF THE OG VOYAGER OR THE DUPLICATE ONE. IF IT WAS EVER MADE CLEAR PLEASE LET ME KNOW. I HAVE BEEN HAUNTED BY THIS EPISODE SINCE I WAS IN THE 5TH GRADE AND I NEED CLOSURE!!!!

AND!!!!! IT WAS SO FRUSTRATING BECAUSE THEY GOT SO CLOSE!!!! THEY ALMOST MADE IT!!!! BUT THEY WERE TOO LATE AND DIED!!!! ITS SO FUCKING TRAGIC 😭😭😭😭

[this-isajokerjoke]

dudley and his attempt at redemption

just imagine y’all

little dudley trying to play with harry and getting in trouble 

the only time he would get scolded or in trouble was when he hung out with harry and when he was angry he never got in trouble when he took it out on harry (ex yelling or punching him in the arm) as a child

so he kinda just stopped being nice to him

once, he was so angry. he got home from school and he could feel his hands shaking and the rage bubbling up his throat. he's seven. then he walks into the kitchen and he sees harry. and he lets loose. he hits harry again and again and harry is crying and he doesn't care because harry is a freak and when his mother comes in to see what all the noise was all she does is scold harry for being so loud. 

then she asks dudley if he feels better, and he does. all she says is “good im glad you got that out of your system”

so whenever he's angry he takes it out on harry. 

then his aunt comes over and, having heard the stories of harry at school, laughs when dudley shoves harry so hard he slams into his cupboard door. 

after that he hurts harry for fun. soon his friends join in. harry is a freak and he deserves everything after all he put dudley’s family through. this is harry potters punishment. 

this goes on for years

when dudley is fourteen, he starts feeling a little bad listening to harry be beat by his father or seeing him dodge a frying pan for messing up breakfast

he ignores it. his cousin is a freak. he's weird and gets in trouble and isn't liked by anyone. he deserves every bit of pain and hurt because he needs to learn to fit in and be normal. then finally, his house might be peaceful like it is at his friends houses

when he's fifteen, he reads a story in school. it's about a boy who is hurt by his parents and there's a class discussion on the short story. his classmates keep saying that “no one should be hurt by someone who's supposed to take care of them” and his teacher tells the class that if that sort of thing goes on at home, it's classified as abuse and they need to report it

dudley is confused. his situation is different, he thinks. harry is a freak. but after that, he stops hurting harry for fun. it's lost all appeal. 

he lashes out when he's upset. but he can't help but think of that dumb story. 

then, the summer before he turns 16, a new girl moves to surrey. she's pretty, dudley thinks. he meets her. she's kind and makes dudley’s heart skip beats. he goes over to her house one day, to pick her up for a date. she calls her parents by their first names, and dudley questions her. 

“oh,” she says, fidgeting a little. “my birth parents were deemed unfit to have guardianship over me. they're in prison for child abuse. so i'm being fostered.”

that explains her occasional flinches and panic attacks

it's explains why she's underweight. 

so once they began to date, he noticed more and more about her. she had panic attacks a lot, there were certain phrases that sent her into a spiral. she fell asleep on him once, during a movie. she thrashed and screamed and sobbed in her sleep, and when dudley finally woke her up, it took half an hour to coax her into calming down. 

she told him she had nightmares about her childhood. she was diagnosed with ptsd a while back. 

that was when dudley dursley decided to protect this girl with all he had. 

dudley hasnt hung out with his friends in a while. piers asks why at one point, but dudley just shrugs and avoids him more. the group stops talking to him completely when dudley punches one of them in the stomach. he’s not sure why.

so when harry came back for the summer, dudley saw the same things he saw in his girlfriend. he heard his cousin say things in his sleep, for them to stop or to “run cedric, run”

when harry was locked in his room without food or water, dudley snuck some in for him. he gave him ice packs and bandaids and tylenol when he was beat, and he didn't mention harry’s nightmares like he would have years before.

by the time the school year started, dudley knew that his parents hadn't treated harry potter right. there wasn't an excuse for him hurting harry even, and harry had been abused in the dursley home. 

dudley threw up.

when dudley dursley was 17, his cousin returned to his house in a panic. he watched as harry packed everything up and begged the his parents to understand that there was a war, they're in danger, they need to go into hiding please for their own safety

dudley dursley was 17 when he last told his girlfriend he loved her but it was for the best that they broke up. harry wouldn't lie about being in danger, and the last thing dudley wanted was the sweet girl to be hurt again

dudley dursley was 17 when he moved away from surrey. he was 17 when he asked his parents why harry wasn't coming with them and they told him harry was a waste of space. 

dudley dursley was 17 when he realized not even a part of him believed that. 

dudley dursley was 17 when he spoke to his cousin last and told him “i don't think you're a waste of space.”

harry potter is 17 when he says, “thanks big d.”

[qmorningcrew]

dump all your ideas abt ur summer camp au i want to hear it

ahhhhhh first of all anon ily <333

here’s my ideas for the summer camp au so far :)

- it’s called quesadilla summer camp (im so creative lmao)

- the camp was created on an experiment. if it went well, they would implement the plans on a larger scale. (what’s the experiment? it’s assumed it has something to do with crossing the language barriers but no one actually specifies)

- all participants get college scholarships

- but the whole thing is really badly executed? like it just does not have the set up or functionality of a normal summer camp

- there’s just very little supervision or guidance

- the camp is run by some version of the duck, and they’re very uninvolved which leads cucurucho and zero to just Not Care.

- counselors are rubius, cucurucho, and the code entity

- the code entity goes by zero

- zero really doesn’t talk but they all learn pretty easy it’s how fucking awful of an idea it is to piss them off

- cucurucho and zero are they/it besties

- rubius is the same age/around the same age as the campers, cucurucho and zero are older

- sometimes one the campers walks into their cabin and sees an entirely new person in their cabin, which is normal. they switch cabins constantly

- the first week people just keep. randomly wandering off. “where’s wilbur?” two hours later wilbur walks out of the woods with a rock. (not even like a cool rock. it’s just a normal fucking rock)

- phil’s the mom friend. but he’s still a disaster. he’s just the only one with any shred of responsibility. he’s also just got an aura of trustworthiness that makes everyone trust him with their problems

- fit is just. so chill

- he also just? always has what you need? “yeah sorry it’s a bit hot in here, a screw that seemed important fell out of the fan earlier so we haven’t turned it on yet” “oh! i think it’s in here- nope screwdriver’s in the left pocket, where did you say the screw was?”

- dan just kinda disappears for a bit? cucurucho tells the campers he went on vacation but they don’t entirely believe them. dan comes back a little different.

- spreen is always either starting chaos or nowhere to be found

- quackity manages to keep putting himself in the middle of like every problem whether he’s involved or not

- however charlie pretty much is always involved

- luzu is had DID and arin is an alter

- luzu does know about arin but he was just diagnosed and is still figuring it all out

- roier flirts with everyone (except jaiden, he respects her boundaries)

- wilbur brought his guitar with him and sings at the campfire some nights

- charlie only joins in on the meme songs

- jaiden finds the most. random shit. “hey guys i found $20 stuck to the bottom of the picnic table with a piece of gum” “oh dude look! a patch of four leaf clovers!” “woah look at this cool bottle cap i just found!”

- maximus is a conspiracy theorist but in like a, hey this actually genuinely makes sense kind of way

- bad is terrified of spiders

- he saw one in the bathroom of his cabin and was completely moved in to a different cabin within seven minutes

- roier finds this hilarious

- foolish and vegetta are dating. no one knows how they got together or when they got together. if you ask either of them, you’ll get two completely different answers

- the brazilians join two-ish weeks in

- they all arrive together in a bus together and have already formed a Friendship on the journey there

- the bus was almost set ablaze 4-6 separate times (depends on your definition on separate)

- there is an extremely done cucurucho driving the bus

- forever sees phil and immediately turns to tell felps how that is the man of his dreams

- mike and pac are inseparable. they’re just kind of always within the vicinity of each other.

- cellbit, bad, foolish, and maximus attempt to take over the camp together. it doesn’t go as planned.

[misc-obeyme]

Since nobody has asked about Ciaran I’ll have to fix this injustice! >:(

11: Do they still have any objects from their childhood? What is their most vivid childhood memory?

12: What is something they have experienced that has shaped themed into the person they are today?

07: Would they date an immortal being if they aren’t immortal themself, and vice-versa?

09: How is their temper? Are they quick to violence? Do they get frustrated easily?

09: Share some fluff headcanons!

10: Share some angst headcanons!

11: Something you really want to mention about them that you haven’t before!

07: Where do you think they would most likely end up in—heaven or hell?

08: Do they carry anything with them protect themself from the paranormal?

I’ll stop myself for now! ILY CC!!💖💖

Ahhhh thank you Ivy, ily too!! 💕

Okay this is gonna be all about Ciaran and so you're all going to learn some new stuff about them for sure lol.

11: Do they still have any objects from their childhood? What is their most vivid childhood memory?

Okay, time for the story of why Ciaran loves the ocean. Ciaran's father died when Ciaran was ten. It was a fast acting cancer so once he was diagnosed, he went pretty quickly. But before that, when Ciaran was about seven or eight, the whole family went on a trip to Ireland (where both of Ciaran's parents are originally from) to visit family and so on. One day, Ciaran's father took them for a hike out to the ocean. It was all green hills and rocky cliffs. And they stopped for a while on a cliff where they could see out across the waves. And Ciaran's father told them stories about selkies. They walked along the beach for a bit, too, and chose a single rock to bring back with them. Ciaran still has that rock and this is by far their most vivid childhood memory.

12: What is something they have experienced that has shaped themed into the person they are today?

Well obviously their dad passing away at a young age was a big deal. But other than that, I would say it was discovering their love for painting. Ciaran is naturally very active and energetic, but painting is a calming and relaxing thing to do. They were so entranced by the method and the colors and depicting things in a visual medium that the found themselves able to settle and concentrate on it. They can't really do that easily in general, so it was like unlocking this piece of themselves they didn't know they had. It first really began to impact them when they were in a high school art class where they had to paint for an assignment. And the teacher could see that Ciaran was really connecting with that in particular and encouraged them to pursue it further.

07: Would they date an immortal being if they aren’t immortal themself, and vice-versa?

Ciaran is very much a "live in the now" type of person, so they might not even consider the consequences of something like that at first. However. Ciaran dearly cherishes the time they had with their father, even if it was short. So I think that if Ciaran was the immortal one, they wouldn't have a problem dating someone who was mortal. They would be happy just to love someone for however long that person is around. Because they know that even when that person is gone, the impact they had on Ciaran will live on until Ciaran themselves has passed on. In the opposite situation, I think Ciaran would consider it to be the choice of the immortal person. Since Ciaran would get to have that immortal partner by their side all of their life (assuming they don't break up or something). So Ciaran would totally date an immortal while being mortal, but they would consider it the immortal's choice in the end.

09: How is their temper? Are they quick to violence? Do they get frustrated easily?

Ahaha. Ciaran has a short fuse! There are a couple of specific things that really set them off. And once that temper explodes, yes they will get violent. They're pretty short so they have a tendency to throw things at people, but they will absolutely get into fist fights at the drop of a hat.

They can get frustrated easily, but it depends on the situation. They get frustrated with people who are needlessly mean, whether that's mean to themselves or mean to others. They also don't like it when people treat them as an inferior or like a child. It's pretty easy to ruffle their feathers lol.

09: Share some fluff headcanons!

Okay, for this I'm going to tell you another little story about what happens when Ciaran falls for one of the characters.

Ciaran paints large pieces with oils, but they also carry around a smaller book that they fill with on the go watercolor paintings. They tend to paint landscapes and abstracts. They take a lot of pictures when they first arrive in the Devildom and end up painting a lot of different Devildom flowers and buildings. They're fascinated by this whole new world of stuff to paint, so they end up with piles of canvases in their room.

And then one day the character they have feelings for (this changes because I can't decide) finds a portrait they've painted. It's still on the easel, an amazingly well crafted portrait in oils. And of course, it's a portrait of that character. He asks Ciaran about it, thinking Ciaran must have taken a picture of him when he wasn't looking. Ciaran's a little baffled by this (and also a little embarrassed because they didn't really intend for him to see it). Ciaran says that they could have painted a portrait from a photo, but they didn't need to. Ciaran hands over their current watercolor notebook and the character flips through it to find that nearly every other painting is of him. In between the paintings of flora, buildings, and a handful of other people, are paintings of him smiling, concentrating, standing in a RAD hallway, or doing his favorite thing. Ciaran says they painted the oil portrait from memory because they've painted him so many times now that it just comes naturally.

And even though Ciaran doesn't say anything about how they feel, it's basically a confession. What happens next varies depending on the other character, but in the end Ciaran always gives them the portrait.

10: Share some angst headcanons!

Okay lemme give you an extension of the fluff story for this one, then!

Because Ciaran used to paint portraits all the time, back in the human world. But then they fell in love with someone. And they started painting that person all the time. For a while, every painting was of that person. Until that person broke Ciaran's heart. :( Then Ciaran stopped painting portraits and never actually painted another one until the above scenario.

Additionally, I would say that angst for Ciaran is really prevalent in the Nightbringer timeline. They don't even like Solomon at first, until the third season of the OG when they become his apprentice. They eventually realize how smart he is and how lonely he is. Then he earns their respect and friendship. But Ciaran really struggles with the brothers not remembering them. And if they're going to fall for Solomon, they've already got feelings for him by the time Nightbringer happens. But they haven't told him, so it's all angst because they think it's unrequited (what can I say we're dealing with two idiots). So it's a lot of trying not to depend on Solomon too much, but having no one else to turn to, etc.

11: Something you really want to mention about them that you haven’t before!

One time, Ciaran got incredibly drunk and slept with their older sister's boyfriend. Fiadh said she was angry, but Ciaran was like yo do you think I'm dumb? I can tell that you don't actually care, what's up with that? And that's when Fiadh decided to come out to her family as a lesbian. Needless to say, she broke up with that boyfriend and did not really mourn his loss. In the meantime, Ciaran felt terrible because they really didn't mean to do it and they were far more careful about their alcohol consumption after that. Because they love their sister and would never hurt her intentionally. And they would like to not hurt her accidentally if they can avoid it.

07: Where do you think they would most likely end up in—heaven or hell?

Wow what a question. Are we saying this is when they die? Because I kinda think Ciaran would be hell bound lol. I'm not sure, honestly. Do they get a say at all? Because in that case they're definitely going to choose hell, assuming that's just the Devildom and not like... a fire and brimstone type of situation. But despite being an angry lil guy with a bit of a violent streak, Ciaran is generally a good person. So I guess it depends on what the requirements are. But they would choose to be in the Devildom if they could.

08: Do they carry anything with them protect themself from the paranormal?

Ciaran is no longer a practicing Catholic, but due to their upbringing, they still have bits of that lingering in the way they deal with this kind of thing. They've been known to cross themselves out of habit when they're really frightened. They also have a few saint medallions. They keep one of St Christopher in their car. Due to their love of animals, sometimes they will wear a St Francis of Assisi medallion too. (Their mother keeps their rosary for them.) But if such things are toxic to demons, they will leave them behind lol. Other than that, I don't think they have anything that's specific for protecting themselves from the paranormal. Though I could see them wanting to make such a thing that doesn't hurt demons because they care about having some protection.

Woo! That was fun, so much of this is stuff I've just had sitting around in my head for ages! Thank you for asking!!

MC & OC Ask Game

[stvrkendrc]

✹ ˚₊ 𝖮𝟭. ﹚ ꗃ BACKGROUND ⸃

[ ## trigger warnings: mention of depression and anoressia. ]

Raised into a wealthy and “privileged” family, Kang Saetbyeol — mostly known by the English given name, Kendra Kang — has always been interested in music, since young age, her big influence she claimed to be her own father, Kang Yicheol, who was since the early 2000 years an active artist in the industry, before retiring to focus on managing his empire, DASK. Though she loved music, she wanted to try something different, for this reason she decided to audition as a model — with her mother’s surname Joo— in many companies, the only company who accepted her was YG Entertainment, which Kendra signed a contract in 2008 at the age. She started as a joke, but she eventually got really immersed up into modeling. Her journey to become “super model” was hard, she loved getting the attention she couldn’t deny, but she also felt like she was pressed by her company, constantly wanting her to be on perfect shape, always practicing her walk. Kendra’s schedules where already ethic at such a young age that she don’t have the time to spend time by herself or her family.

Kendra told her father about the situation, who was firmly supported her, he told her that the best way was to leave the agency, as a CEO himself, but also as her dad, she couldn’t see her daughter so tired of… life. Because Kendra was diagnosed with depression, she was also not in a good relationship with food which brought her into anoressia, this slowly ruined her mental state. Saetbyeol Kang was sick, the best choice was to leave the agency, take some time off and maybe starting off something new. In late 2013, she asked for her contract’s cancelation but it got rejected, instead she was obligated to make her acting debut, since according to the company she was gaining attention due her facial features.

In 2014 decided to give the company the ultimatum, she wanted her 7-year contract to end, she was sick of waiting, she was determined into getting a lawsuit, but with surprise her contract was announced to be ended by her boss, she would later found out that her father and Yang Hyunsuk had a talk which he apparently talked about her daughter under the company. Kendra was angry with her dad, but she will later understand that he did it for her own good. That was she wanted the most.

Kendra was finally free, she had the time to rest, to heal her mind and especially body, but she also thought at what doing next, she wasn’t going to stop her career, she wanted to continue, but that needed time. Only in 2015 it was announced that her and her brother Kang Seungyoon founded a company: SEVEN SINS LABS, which Kendra would later debut under as the first artist.

✹ ˚₊ 𝖮𝟮. ﹚ ꗃ BASICS ⸃

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ BIRTH NAME. Kang Saetbyeol

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ BIRTH DATE. October 23th, 1996

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ BIRTH PLACE. Manchester, England

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ RESIDENCE. Soul, South Korea

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ ETHNICITY. South Korean

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ NATIONALITY. South Korean 1/2, British 1/2

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ HEIGHT. 1.79 cm ❪ 5’10 ❫

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ MBTI. INTP ❪ the logician ❫

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ ZODIAC. Scorpio

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ PIERCINGS. eleven

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ TATTOS. none

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ FACE CLAIM. Park Soojoo ❪ model ❫

✹ ˚₊ 𝖮𝟯. ﹚ ꗃ CAREER ⸃

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ STAGE NAME. Kendra K. or Kendra Kang

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ YEAR ACTIVE. 2009 — present

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ COMPANY. KK Studio ❪ currently ❫ ; DEADLY SINS LABS ❪ currently ❫ ; YG Entertainment ❪ former ❫

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ OCCUPATION. model, actress, singer, producer, composer

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ DEBUT DATE. June 5th, 2015

。𓍢𓍢 ★̶̲ ꜜ ˒ DISCOGRAPHY.

ꗃꠂꠥ. THIS IS HOW WE DO ; single ❪ 2015 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. KIDULT FEELS ; single ❪ 2015 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. BE THE ONE ; single ❪ 2015 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. RISING STAR ; extended play ❪ 2015 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. KK VEGEANCE ; single ❪ 2016 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. CONSEQUENCES ; single ❪ 2017 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. +WDYT+ (write down your threat) ; single ❪ 2017 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. DON’T START NOW ; single ❪ 2020 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. RHYTHM CLUB ; album ❪ 2020 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. WHAT TYPE OF X ; single ❪ 2022 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. PHYSICAL ; single ❪ 2023 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. SPICE (FEAT. W.U of ASHOY) ; single ❪ 2023 ❫

ꗃꠂꠥ. PANIC ON STORE ; album ❪ 2023 ❫

MORE DETAILS IN THIS PAGE !

[nikarie5]

Sugar Rush - snippet

Rating: General audience. No ships. Juvenile diabetes, bullying, racism, and sexism. Incorrect medical advice. Excessive use of commas and run-on sentences.

General description: Remus helps one of his summer Cubs navigate how to continue in sports after a diagnosis of Type 1A diabetes. Thanks to @lumosinlove for the characters, @noots-fic-fests for the prompts and cards, and @hazelnoot-analyst for their archive work :)

Remus sifted through his inbox, which was usually pretty quiet during the summer months before training camp kicked off. There would, however, sometimes be the odd e-mail from a parent related to the Cubs teams he coached, so he continued to check his Lions' e-mail everyday. Sure enough, today, he had two e-mails, one from the ice manager about when the Cubs were expected to arrive for their special arena tour the coming week. One from - hmmm - one from the administration forwarding an e-mail from Mr. Sanchez, father to one of the more gifted Cubs Remus has coached in the past three seasons. Lucía had joined their program as a seven year old, and now, at nine, was one of the best skaters and players on the ice. She had worked hard to catch up to the kids who had grown up on the ice, learning to skate as soon as they could walk, and she showed an instinctive grasp of hockey tactics and reading plays on the fly. She had missed last week, and he hoped this wasn't bad news. Remus clicked open the e-mail, scanned it quickly, then let out a breath. It wasn't good news, but it certainly wasn't as bad as he feared. Lucía had just been diagnosed with juvenile diabetes, and was afraid that she couldn't play hockey anymore. Remus fired out a response, inviting Lucía and her father to a meeting before the next practice. Then, he hit the books. Well, he hit the internet, collecting resources from reliable sites he already knew of and sniffing out some sites with information that might be more accessible to an 8-year old, and some resources in Spanish, just in case. Then he called his buddy Jake, a former NFL tight end Remus had met during his courses at Madison. Jake, a Type 1A diabetic, did a couple of sessions at the university each year for aspiring trainers on how to assist athletes with diabetes, and Remus had stayed in touch. He also fired off an e-mail to Luke Kunin, who had started working with the Madison sports trainers in high school while Remus was finishing up his program, even though Kunin's freshman year was after Remus' graduation. The following Tuesday, Remus felt ready to go. He met Lucía and Mr. Sanchez in the lobby, and ushered them through to his office so they could be assured of privacy. It broke his heart a little to hear Lucía look so defeated when she declared that she couldn't play anymore. Diabetic Mexican girls have no place on the ice, her doctor said. At that, Remus shot a look to Mr. Sanchez, whose jaw had clenched so tight, Remus was afraid he might crack a tooth. "But, you are from Honduras. Lucía, don't believe anything someone says if they can't even get that right once you've told them. Your doctor is very, very, very wrong." "The school says it too, and other players. Only some girls can play hockey, and not brown girls, and not sick brown girls. They say I will get a sugar rush and fall down whenever I skate fast. And they say I will get too fat to skate, only fat Mexicans get diabetes." "I am sorry you had to listen to that. None of what they say is true. I will keep a stronger ear out for that kind of bullying and ask the other coaches to do better too. That kind of attitude does not belong on the ice, in the locker room, or anywhere."

Then, point by point, Remus demolished the false statements, explaining that diabetes is different from a sugar rush, and that with careful management, Lucía can not only play any sport she wants, but excel at it. He shared the tips from Jake and Luke about how to wrap Lucía's new continuous glucose monitor and pump so that they were protected without impeding movement or insulin flow. He talked about nutrition and managing diet in the sense of being aware of how your body was feeling, and learning when and what to eat ahead of expected activities, and how to recognise a low. He shared his stories of working with Kunin, and how the whole World Junior team kept jelly beans in their pockets and on the bench, just in case Kunin needed to quickly raise his blood sugar. He talked about how the discipline and awareness of how her body is feeling that Lucía will develop while managing her diabetes might help her with the work needed to become a professional athlete, if that is a goal she decides to pursue (although nothing can guarantee anyone will make it to a professional, - and doesn't Remus know all about that, he thinks silently to himself - but diabetes certainly shouldn't stop her).

An alarm started to ring from the desk, and noting that it was almost practice time, he gave Lucía a handful of the temporary tattoos Jake had courriered over to him, some a simple blue circle, others the circle with the words Insulin Dependent written underneath. Then he sent Lucía off to change into her gear, but asked Mr. Sanchez to stay behind for a second.

"What your doctor said to Lucía was incredibly inappropriate, damaging, and incorrect. Is there any chance you can switch doctors?"

"I have already started the process to transfer Lucía to a pediatrician who specialises in juvenile diabetes." "Good. If that doesn't work out, please reach out to us here, and we will try to share more resources and make some connections with organisations the Lions work with regularly. Also, if I may be so bold, please report that doctor to the state board and the US Department of Health and Human Services. I have to head to the ice, but, please, don't hesitate to reach out to me if you have any other questions or concerns about Lucía playing hockey. I can set up another meeting like this anytime this summer. Lucía is a gifted player and a great leader on the ice, hockey would be worse off without her playing."

[kikiiswashere]

Life, man.

I’ve debated writing this for a few weeks. But, you never know until you put yourself out there, right?

Some of you may recall that around this time last year I wrote briefly about my autistic burnout and having to close my brick-and-mortar studio (yoga). The time since then has, unfortunately, continued to be increasingly challenging.

Since about October/November 2023, my mental health has been steadily deteriorating further. I’m taking new medication, working with my general physician and therapist, and trying to find a psychiatrist. Living in the USA, though, makes this frustratingly hard. Wait-times are outrageous. As are out-of-pocket costs.

Almost a month ago, my husband left his toxic work environment. Without the parachute of another job lined up. We have been trying to get him a new job for literally years (like, seven) to no avail. But he could not stay there any longer. After years of suffering verbal, mental, and emotional abuse (from customers as well as administration), and being physically assaulted (something we just recently learned has left him a traumatic brain injury) it benefit of his salary and health insurance was not worth the cost. He has suffered, I have suffered, and we - as a partnership - have suffered from it. We are continuing to look for new, salaried/benefitted work for him, but at this point nothing has come up. And with the cost of living what it is, and only my part-time paycheck keeping us afloat. . . We are stressed out, as you can imagine.

The final kicker is this: Also, about a month ago, one of our pups was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Remy is doing okay right now. He still wants to eat, go on walks, and gets the Zoomies, but he most likely will not last the year. We spent many dollars to get to this diagnosis, and now knowing there’s nothing we can do but keep him comfortable is as maddening as it is upsetting.

We are doing what we can. Looking into state resources, cutting our spending and resources where we can, leaning on friends and family, etc.

Which brings me to the point of this post: I have a Ko-Fi page now!

If you enjoy my works, be it writing or drawing, and you can, please consider buying me a ‘coffee’, as they say. I would greatly, deeply appreciate it. I am also preparing commission information soon. So, keep an eye out for that.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you so much! As a reward, please enjoy these pictures of our boy, Remy ❤️

[xalhaau]

Bucket-List

FT.— Ran Haitani

WARNING(S)— Afab Reader, Angst, Sickness, Mentions Of M4rders, Gangs, Death, Graves, Swear Words.

PS— I got lazy at the end so the ending isn’t that good lol.

“ I’m sorry, Miss L/N.. You are diagnosed with a rare disease which will eventually lead to a terminal illness..”

————

You were devastated, who wouldn’t be? Knowing you were gonna die sooner or later didn’t feel so great, you even denied the fact you were terminally ill.

How could you be sick? You were literally living a normal life yesterday and suddenly, your terminally ill while death is basically awaiting for your arrival.

What a cruel world we live in, huh.?

Despite all the depression building up inside you, you aren’t even phased at this point so whats the best solution to temporarily leaving your depression? None other than making a bucket-list and enjoying your last days for each day you’d live.

————

My Bucket List.

Day Fifty-seven— Giving food to the homeless.

Day Seventy-fourth— Go to the annual festival.

Day Eighty-sixth— Go bird-watching.

————

It had already passed day seventy-third which means you were going onto day seventy-fourth, going to the annual festival that is held every year, being a big hit to a specific part of Japan; It’d probably be your last time at this festival.

You were currently getting ready, slipping your socks on while grabbing your new shoes that you bought yesterday after handing out homemade food to the homeless around Roppongi, your home city, where you live.

Grabbing the keys to your car, you picked up your coat off of the coat hanger and headed out, grabbing your bag along with your cell phone, locking the door to your apartment.

Calmly driving through Roppongi with fingers tapping onto the steering wheel, you navigated to Shibuya, where the festival is always held; You were excited to go to the festival you’ve always been to since you were a kid, this was always your favorite place when you were a child.

Parking your car while getting out and locking it, you walked towards the festival with your cell phone and bag clutched in your hands. You parked further, due to the minimum access of parking with cars flooding the streets of Shibuya near the night-time festival.

It was going as a peaceful walk until you heard a groan coming from an alleyway, you were around 8 minutes from the festival entrance as you looked around the street, very few people were also walking towards the festival as you stood still, looking through the alleyway of the sound.

A figure could be seen walking out with what seemed like.. a stick?! No, it looked like some sort of weapon.

Were you really gonna get murdered here before your sickness murders you? That’d be a horrible death, you tried running but couldn’t, your body staying frozen while you cursed yourself, “ Gosh, stupid body move your fucking legs before they murder you, you dumb legs!” Yes, you were insulting yourself.

Before your body could start taking off, a chuckle was heard as you looked towards the chuckling stranger, or rather, a very familiar man.

You let out a sigh as you recognized the face, “ Hello, Ran.” Standing awkwardly while you waved at him as he just stared at your waving figure, Ran waved back, “ Hi Y/N, long time, huh?” He retracted his baton and shoved it into his pocket.

A nod was seen as you sheepishly smiled, starting to walk off until he grabbed your shoulders, “ Where do you think your going, hm?” You chuckled, trying to wiggle yourself out of his grip “ To the festival, obviously.?” He gave you a blank stare, now it was your turn to laugh.

A sour look was shot towards you as you were practically a laughing donkey at this point, “ Its the annual Shibuya festival, you know? Also, why are you in Shibuya, shouldn’t you be in Roppongi?” He nodded towards your comment “ Well, I guess we should go to the festival then, Y/N.” You walked alongside the man as both of you headed to the festival.

————

Pointing towards the white cat plushie while Ran threw his tickets towards the salesman “ Win that plushie for me, Ran!” He grinned at you as he knocked down all the bottles while the salesman scowled, an obvious ‘scam’ that he tried to set up yet the infamous older Haitani outdid the cheap scam.

Ran points towards the large, white cat plushie as the man sourly handed it to him as you cheered to Ran, “ Good job, Ran!” You threw him a thumbs up as he smiled towards you, genuinely.

You hugged the plushie as Ran stared at you, “ Lets get some food, yea?” You nodded as you followed Ran to a food-stand “ What do you want to eat, i’ll pay.” You looked at the menu and grabbed your wallet out of your bag, “ It’s okay, I can pay for both of us and i’ll just take the takoyaki.” Ran nodded and gave the lady both of your orders as you handed her the money while smiling towards Ran.

You grabbed the food as Ran sat at a random table, heading towards the table as you set both food plates down “ Heres your food.” You handed his dish towards him as he grabbed it out of your hand, smiling at you.

Currently, fireworks were going off as the two of you ate, “ I’ve always wanted to watch the fireworks with someone, my parents always made us leave before we could see the fireworks since it was too late.” He just stared at you as you smiled towards him, “ I’m grateful for this experience, you know? I also have something to tell you and I have something to give you.” He was all ears.

A sigh could be heard as Ran stared at you more, “ I’m terminally ill, Ran. I could die any day now, i’m so happy we did this.” A tear fell from your eyes as Ran’s eyes widened, not in a good way.

He was shocked, nothing could leave the elder Haitani speechless but this, this was probably the only thing that did “ Are you serious, Y/N.? When did you figure this out?” You nodded, “ Like around 3 months ago.” He looked sad, no.. could the Ran Haitani actually be sad for you? Impossible.

You’ve known the man and his little brother since children due to the fact, you ran away from home and ran into the two boys on your childish escape from home.

You pressed your hand on your forehead as you mumbled words, “ Ran, I don’t think...” He let out a hum as you paused your speaking while he looked up from his food “ I don’t feel so good.” And just like clockwork..

Ran watched as you fell off your seat and onto the dirt floor while he rushed to your side, obviously forgetting his food while scooping you up, grabbing his phone from his pocket and dialing an ambulance.

————

The night was basically a blur for Ran as he sat in the hospital, outside your hospital room; Ran remembered watching you being carried onto a lifter while he jumped inside the ambulance, demanding for answers from your sudden faint.

Rindou had heard of news since he frantically called his older brother, asking him for where he was and why he wasn’t already home, he even came to the hospital as he looked at you through the window.

He always knew Ran had a thing for you, avoiding girls and relationships since he was dedicated to court you, or rather Ran’s official words, “ I’ll never touch or talk to any woman unless its Y/N, Rindou.” Rindou never doubted his big-brothers words as it was literally painfully obvious currently, watching his big brother sit on the floor, patiently waiting for your awake.

Suddenly, Ran saw many staff rush into your room, hearing code-words as more ran inside your hospital room.

Ran stood up, trying to see the commotion through the glass but the many staff blocked that from happening as he saw staff leaving the room while one nurse came towards him.

She gave a sympathetic smile towards him as he glared at her, “ Hello, are you Ran Haitani?” He nodded as she handed him a letter “ This is from Miss Y/N before she passed.” Ran let her words register into his head as he paused, “ Y/N passed away.?” The nurse nodded as she sadly smiled towards him.

He read the letter as tears slowly fell from the mans eyes, surprisingly, the letter was written two months ago, you had made it a part of your bucket-list to confess your love to Ran, hoping you’d run into him someday; you had kept it in your bag at all times, hoping you’d walk into Ran Haitani someday.

————

July 17, 2006.

Dear Ran Haitani,

I love you and I hope I can express my love to you through this letter someday, I know its childish of me to write a love letter to you and hope you see it but I truly believe it will work.

Did I tell you, i’m terminally ill and i’m counting my days down, I also made a bucketlist and I hope I can finish it.. Though, I will probably die before I can finish it, haha!

Anyways, I just wanted to tell you, I love you and I mean in every single possible way.

Love, Y/N L/N. ♡

————

July 17, 2018.

“ Mikey, i’m gonna get off early today.”

He nodded as Ran walked out of the building, heading towards his car to drive to a certain someone’s grave.

Before he made it to that special someones grave, he stopped by the local flower store which sold that special someones favorite flowers which also symbolize undying love, “ Can I get 6 dozen pairs of your red asters?” The flower-lady nodded as she got the impressive bouquet of flowers ready.

————

He set the flowers down onto your grave while he kneeled in front of it, “ Hey, its been a while, I really miss you, you know?” He read your grave name “ I visit every day on the day you passed, Mikey always knows where I go every July 17th, haha..” Ran was obviously hurt from your disappearance from this world.

Each year, he would come here to pour his heart out to your grave and where you were buried, he had you buried under a tree in a secluded area near the festival since you said you always loved the festival, he’d even come to the festival every year with Rindou as a way to somewhat celebrate the festival.

He knew you had no one other than him and Rindou so he bought your car, its sitting in its own garage at his house since it means so much to him and he visits you whenever he can, not just once a year since he finds himself thinking he’s a jerk to you.

————

Ran Haitani is found at your grave every July 17th, speaking with you and admiring your grave while watching children and parents pass by to the annual festival that is still being held strong.

Ran Haitani also completed your uncompleted bucket-list for you since you sadly passed before you could finish it, he even checked it out day-by-day.

————

Ran checked out the last thing on your 5 page bucket-list as he sighed, staring up towards the ceiling until he turned his cellphone on, the screen showing a picture of you and him on his wallpaper the night you died unexpectedly , the night at the festival.

He mourns over your death every single day, it has became a part of his daily routine but he was grateful he could help accomplish your bucket-list, the least he could do to show his undying love to you, your bucket-list.

[rubin-therubix-loverofblorbos]

You think I'm the best? Aww.

Also you said that Spy was disabled due to his ballet career and I was wondering do you have any other disabled HeadCanons?

wy can't Ihug ascreen. devastated,

Engie: Carpal tunnel/Neurodivergencies/Deafness. He made himself a wrist brace out of metal scraps and fabric and somehow it's comfortable. He barely remembers to stop working when it flares up because y'know. It's Engie. He also has horrible hearing and made himself some hearing aids because, again, it's Engie. Also, on the topic of Being Engie™️, he is the worst of the group regarding mental disabilities. OCD, ADD, ADHD, Schizophrenia, Medic even thinks he has Apotemnophilia {He has a weird kink about replacing his limbs with mechanical shit and it worries people. It is most likely rooted in his self-hatred and kind of weird Self-Capragras. What do you MEAN you want me to pretend I'm going to tear you apart gruesomely and leave you to put yourself back together buddy? What The Fuck Do You Mean By That?} But the difference between him and the others? He takes his medication, flat out. Never misses a day except for the day after New Year's when they have to restock. Also, I forgot he only has one hand and ALSO made himself an eye because he got fucked up in a workplace accident [he screwed up on a bigass machine and it blew the fuck up in his face]. So.

Soldier: Vision {Tunnel, has a bad eye}/Neurodivergencies/Deafness/Speech{stutters real bad when he's excited}. [TRIGGER WARNING FOR CHILD DEATH, ABUSE, AND JUST PLAIN HORRIBLENESS} He has. problems.Many problems. Bipolar veteran Dad pushed his face into hot oil, killed his mother, and, when realizing what he did, killed himself. Soon after, Jane was put into an ADULT asylum since he was seventeen and they didn't have any room left. He Was Put Into A Strait Jacket And Muzzle At SEVENTEEN, deemed unsafe and unstable. He now has brain damage. He was on his way to graduating early and had been accepted into Harvard. He wanted to be a lawyer. Had a transfemme friend who was in the Hiroshima bombing and had the pattern of their kimono burnt into their skin. One day, that friend escaped to go to a Pride parade. They didn't come back. Jane now has abandonment issues, but it gets worse. Later, on the news, they say that three children were killed due to police brutality. Jane is terrified, but thinks they made it out. Soon, they show a bloody pulp of a person on-screen, facial features unrecognizable. But they have the pattern of their Kimono burnt into the one patch of skin left untouched. Jane has issues. He found a seven-year-old, Perdita, alone and he took her in, because that's how he is. Raised her to the age of twelve, then he shot her dead because he was having an attack and thought she was his father. Closed his eyes and shot until his gun was empty, only hearing her screaming when he ran up to hold her in his arms. He lies awake, every night, wondering. She wanted to be a lawyer too. Wow. I spent so much time on his story I forgot to explain literally anything else. fuck.

Spy: Vision/Neurodivergencies/Walking. As we know, he broke his hip doing ballet. but he ALSO has trauma from being a hitchhiking prostitute. He also also has asymmetrical eyes, which mess up his vision sometimes. He Also also also has allodynia, which makes him hate being touched. He seeks attention because after his parents died he found out how privileged he was and how nobody really cares anymore. Bad separation issues.

Sniper: Neurodivergancies/fantasy illness i invented don't worry about it. The dude has perfect aim he hyperfocuses on that shit like crazy. Sniper is one of the better guys, though he has a mild case of anorexia and has had flat-out Cotard's ever since Medic gave him an autopsy. No, he's not like Engie where we're not sure, he has been diagnosed and given medication. He also has small eyes, but it doesn't affect anything, really. OH also SEVERE Genophobia from a misinformating Ex that kept telling him sex was fucking agonizing for the bottom and assaulted him. Violently. Until he was unconscious. He doesn't remember anything but the fear, not even the pain, just how scared he was. A lot of scars on his inner thighs from the guy slashing him with a dagger. Was a virgin until he was 41 and went fuckin insane when his hymen broke {it broke during his assault but was surgically repaired} because oh god he was right I'm gonna bleed until I die oh fuck oh shit. Was okay afterwards, but he's still shaken by that

Heavy: Neurodivergencies. Has a bit of an issue about his father getting eaten by a bear when he was a kid but y'know. In Mother Russia, you don't fuck the bear up the. the bear fucks you up. this is also applicable to any other place that has bears when you don't have a gun.

Pyro:

Demo: Neurodivergencies/His blood is legit alcohol. I mean they all have autism, but Demo has weird autism. that makes him like alcohol a lot. A lot. Demo's are always short because we all know what's going on with him.

Scout: Neurodivergencies/Cerebral Palsy. ADHD little mf. Was also born with cerebral palsy but it wasn't severe enough to keep him from being able to walk, in fact he loves running, as we know.

Medic: Hm. is made of multiple different people's body parts. dunno what that does for him tbh. Was born with severe facial deformities and has a slanted skull to this day because his twin {who was attached to him at the head and calf} died and had to be cut off of him. He talks to himself often and we don't know if he's just being himself or if a little bit of the other's brain was left in there. He also has Tourettes and his most common tic is a short but of maniacal laughter. etcetera. because this is definitely not the only things wrong with him

[stoportotouch]

PLEASE tell me about the lieutenantcules kids

ohoho i would Love to

they end up having two, james frederick (little and hodgson) and katherine "kate" alexandria (irving and hodgson). (obviously hodge is transmasc here.) james is born in january 1849 and kate is born in july 1850. They Were Busy, is what i'm suggesting here. (behold my lovely spreadsheet, because i can't keep track of these people otherwise.)

since this is The One Where Doctor MacDonald Survives, he is also the one to deliver both of them. (which is great because hodgson doesn't fancy explaining all that whatnot to a new doctor.) this later becomes a great advantage in that it prevents hodgson from Fucking Dying having kate.

lots of Stuff below the cut, because i have a lot to say about these childen as it turns out.

james is named after fitzjames and fairholme (and also edward's older brother james cornelius) and also after fred hornby. after he's born, hodgson (slightly high on Fun Victorian Narcotics, as was the fashion at the time) suggests calling him "james james". this is not necessarily unfitting considering that he is named after the man so james that they called him it twice but get Vetoed.

james is one of those "started talking late but once he started he never stopped again" neurodivergent kids, and his Personality is basically the same as hodgson's. (this includes The Neurodivergence. he would be diagnosed with autism and adhd if this was the 21st century.) this eventually leads him to join the diplomatic corps, for some reason.

he is basically hodgson's software on little's hardware in that he looks and physically acts basically exactly like little but with some of hodgson's pointy features. he... is short. (just barely taller than little when he's full grown.) partly because, as you can see, april of 1848 isn't that long after they were rescued.

but also little is short and in a short family, and hodgson is alone in his immediate family in being tall. (or rather, he was objectively tall pre-transition. he got bumped down to Just Below Average Height by the simple expedient of cutting his hair.)

james was also The World's Most Difficult Baby, again because he was born to somebody who was still kind of recovering from scurvy and definitely recovering from lead poisoning. this is literally just because the "thank god we're alive" came back LONG before the... actual intelligence did. (it also fucked hodgson's hip up for the rest of his life.)

for the first year or so james does Not like not being held, wakes up at just about every noise or External Stimulus and has colic. then around his first birthday he suddenly just goes like "hm, no more of that, thanks" and starts walking. which completely fixes all the other problems. (he still doesn't start talking until quite a while after kate.)

the not talking does give his Dads pause until james cornelius mentions when he visits that edward didn't talk until he was about seven. thus when james starts talking when he's about five or six this seems to explain everything. (one difference: when edward started talking he seemed to do so unwillingly and never talked much. james starts and then never stops for the rest of his life. this is presumably hodgson's genetics kicking in.)

as i mentioned earlier. katherine (or kate) is hodgson and irving's kid, which is just... a fascinating combination of personalities to cross-pollinate. she's named after katherine irving, who is irving's sister-in-law (and also one of his best friends), and also after alexander macdonald.

katherine irving is an obvious person to name her after, especially since irving is a bit glum about not being able to tell his family about Having Kids, on account of The Circumstances. but naming his kid after her is the next best thing (especially when he had always promised her Godmother Rights if he had kids). alexandria is, obviously, after doctor macdonald. it seems like the least they can do since he stops hodgson from dying. (kate is completely fine.)

kate is like. the world's most chill baby, and also the pregnancy is far physically/psychologically easier on hodgson than james was. most of the issue the first time was the combination of "the unknown" and like. Gender Stuff. the latter of these still gets to him from time to time with kate but far more mildly and he feels more able to talk about it. (because he was pregnant with james while little was recovering from a brain injury and irving was recovering from being stabbed. as i said, they were not especially bright in this regard.)

as i said earlier, having james when he was still recovering fucks up hodgson's hip for the rest of his life. this actually doesn't lead to what happens with kate but it probably doesn't help. (kate is also a far larger baby, since irving is tall and quite broad when he isn't malnourished, and from quite a tall family.) long story short doctor macdonald figures out that hodgson isn't just sore/tired and a bit high and hodgson gets an emergency hysterectomy out of it.

hodgson later suggests, once everybody has recovered from the shock of "partner/other father of our kids/friend just nearly bled to death", that they call her stephanie. you know, because of doctor stanley (who in fairness he did get on really well with. world's oddest friendship, or not really considering that when we see doctor stanley make attempts at Bedside Manner it's basically hodgson through a filter of irony poisoning).

little and irving haven't even talked about it and irving is kind of... avoiding it all (he does with both births but hodgson only particularly wants little with him. not for any particularly Personal reason irving's energy is just too jumpy for a sick-room). hodgson does suggest that he be there when kate is born because he knows what to expect now and they're All a bit further out from The Initial Arctic Trauma. irving says no, which turns out to be the right decision because he spends about a week having a panic attack.

they decide on a full name for her very quickly. (both of them have hodgson's surname, just to avoid any questions. this doesn't actually avoid questions with james because he looks like little.)

kate looks basically exactly like hodgson did as a kid, which is really weird for him (and also makes him a bit more protective of her than he was expecting to be). it's doubly weird that she also acts exactly like he did. as an adult she ends up looking like hodgson but a girl/with irving's tone of voice and way of speaking. (she's also about six foot tall fully grown.) basically she looks like this leyendecker painting.

she basically acts like hodgson would if he didn't have... The Problems. which can be extremely annoying but also it's great for her; she's assertive in a way that neither of her Dads could ever manage in addition to being at least book-intelligent. (she isn't people-intelligent.) she fortunately doesn't pick up irving's anxiety (or his compulsions) but she does get his Maths Brain.

she and hodgson still bond over music but she's very into like. Finding The Right Answer so he gets her into bach. this works excellently. she eventually ends up with his ancient copy of gradus ad parnassum that he's scribbled in over the course of a few decades. she is far better at bach chorale harmonisations than he is. (or rather, she picks it up far quicker.)

-----

on the subject of their families: some of little's family know but this is limited to james cornelius (Gay Uncle, beloved by both james and kate for all their lives), and little's sister margaret anne (and her husband, john). margaret and john don't particularly get it but also "aw, nieces and nephews" (and margaret likes hodgson). they look after james when kate is born.

hodgson... basically does not talk at all to his family, honestly. his dad died in 1844 (literally right before he met irving. like he was going through all that while they were having a really complicated Situationship that ended with irving trying to ghost him but not being emotionally able to) and while he used to get on with his mother... not so much any more.

if he hadn't had kids then he would probably have gritted his teeth with at least two of his siblings (beilby porteus and mary) and at least tried to have more of a relationship with them. but then as soon as he has james he's just like, "yeah my family are never getting near our kids", and kate being born (and everything around that) cements that in his mind.

he uh. i have so much to say about his relationship with his oldest sister, henrietta mildred. but the summary as it pertains to this is "he is still stuck at the level of a very scared seven-year-old where she is concerned and she is stuck at the level of a very miserable nineteen-year-old where he is concerned." they could probably talk it out. it would actually be beneficial. but they literally never will.

-----

further on Family Dynamics (and also a bit about Victorian Class Dynamics):

hodgson is a good amount younger than his siblings (or than his surviving siblings). he's one of five that survived to adulthood and he's ten years younger than the next one up which means that he was basically an only child but that his parents had forgotten everything about babies and toddlers. so like, Victorian Ideas About The Child, Multiplied By Ten Thousand.

he was also completely unexpected and while not quite unwanted he was far more handed off to nurse and then nanny than his older siblings as a kid. and then he went away to a boarding school aged thirteen, joined the navy at the age of fifteen, and basically never came back again. (until post-franklin-expedition.)

so he thinks that little, whose family mostly still live together and see each other as often as they can, has a really weird relationship with his parents and siblings. little is not going to argue this because he's sure he'll find something awful if he scratches the surface. also hodgson isn't going to press the issue because uh. little came home to discover that his mother had died a couple of months before they were rescued. so he doesn't want to cause any further Hurt.

little does, though, feel really weird about handing the kids off to nannies and nurses and governesses. (he's one of twelve from a family which was upwardly mobile but still working-ish class. they could not afford all that whatnot.) he still ends up getting on very well with the nurse they find, who they keep employing after james is born. this turns out to be a good thing when kate is born, because of The Circumstances.

[scotianostra]

Happy Birthday veteran Scottish actress Phyllida Law, born on May 8th 1932 in Glasgow.

There is very little  about her early life except she was born in Glasgow, the daughter of Megsie “Meg” and William Law, a journalist. She said once of he Glasgow upbringing “When you grow up in Glasgow with a Glaswegian granny, you’re taught that pride is a wicked thing. I still feel a bit like that.“ Phyllida grew up in Glasgow’s west end, just off Great Western Road, but war broke out when she was just seven and she found herself evacuated to places such as Lenzie, in Dunbartonshire, and Skelmorlie, Ayrshire.

That gave her a love for the Scots countryside which means she now splits her life between her home in London and a family cottage in Argyll. Phyllida would fit in well with the Scottish & Proud ethos, in an interview she says:

“I’m passionate about my Scots heritage. How could I not be?  I can’t live without it. There’s no way I could live without those hills and it’s got to be the west coast. “I sometimes travel to Edinburgh then go up to Pittenweem or somewhere and I think to myself, ‘This isn’t Scotland.’ It’s a wonderful coastline but it’s not Scotland for me.

“When my parents lived in Glasgow they were always looking for a cottage to which they could retire. They found one in Ardentinney, so I visit that a lot.

She joined the Bristol Old Vic in 1952, from what I can gather she was first in the wardrobe department, the first pic shows her standing, from a 1952 photo. Heron screen acting credits start in 1958 and are very extensive, the pick of them are Dixon of Dock Green and a stint as the storyteller in the great children’s show Jackanory in the 60’s. It must have been during her time in the BBC’s children’s TV department she met her husband to be The Magic Roundabout narrator Eric Thompson, She has previously stated that the character of Ermintrude the cow was modelled on her.

Angels in the 70’s and of course Taggart in the 80’s as well Thomson, the variety series hosted by actress Emma Thompson in 1988, Emma just happens to be her daughter. Heartbeat, Hamish Macbeth and Dangerfield in the 90’s, Waking the dead and Doctors in the noughties has kept her busy, now in her 86th year she has still been appearing on the small screen, in The Other Wife and New Tricks during the past 8 years. Film roles include She is known for her work on Much Ado About Nothing , The Time Machine and The Winter Guest.

Phyllida spends most of her time in Argyll in a house she shares with her daughter Emma. who is spending more time looking after her mother, as she was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease in 2915.

Phyllida constantly needs the support of a wheelchair and even assistance when washing due to the effect the condition is having on her.

Due to the progressive nature of the condition, symptoms tend to gradually worsen over time. It is common for individuals to struggle both with walking and talking at the height of the condition.

Phyllida herself spoke about the burdens of looking after an infirm parent, she looked after her mother, Meg who suffered with Alzheimer’s disease. Mego died in 1994 aged 93 after almost 20 years of being cared for by Ms Law at her mother's home in the village of Ardentinny on the west coast, near Dunoon.

[anubislover]

Miscalculations and Misfits

The Big Daddy was hardly the most reputable tavern, nor the cleanest, but considering how the entirety of Joras had been damp, dreary, and full of people giving him and his crew suspicious glances, it suited Law just fine. He was a rookie pirate anyway, so the eighteen-year-old captain rarely felt any inclination to show his face in more respectable establishments. What mattered to him was that it was dry, the food was edible, the ale was strong, and there were only seven other customers, a barkeeper, a cook in the back, and a tavern maid manning the tables, so it was relatively quiet compared to most places a pirate might visit when seeking a meal not cooked in their own galley. Sure, a few people had still given questioning glares, especially since he’d walked in with a sword nearly as tall as himself and a polar bear, but for the most part the clientele seemed more interested in sharing grim stories or serenading the tavern maid with macabre folk songs. So, the quartet had ordered their food with the confidence they wouldn’t be chased out should anyone recognize the jolly roger on any of their backs.

Booted feet propped up on the creaky wooden table, Law linked his fingers behind his head as he regarded Shachi, Penguin, and Bepo. His oldest friends had uncharacteristically serious expressions on their faces, especially considering how they would usually be joking around and chatting loudly in most circumstances. Golden eyes narrowed in irritation. They hadn’t shown nearly this much resistance with any of his past recruits. Hell, the main difference between their new shipmate and the rest was the fact that he’d actually asked her to join, unlike, say, Darter who had simply declared he was trading in his serial killer career for piracy, or Crozier who had taken one look at a ship full of teens and decided they needed adult supervision.

Well, there was one other difference, he supposed, but if the guys were seriously giving him the stink-eye because a girl was joining the Heart Pirates, he might just remove their eyeballs for a bit. Ok, not Bepo’s, but only because his expression was more worried than judgmental. And it was infinitely cuter than the others, but he wouldn’t admit that, even on his death bed.

“Are you three seriously going to give me crap about the new girl?” Law finally asked, raising an eyebrow challengingly. “I wasn’t aware that ‘No Girls Allowed’ was one of my ship’s articles.”

Behind his sunglasses, Shachi rolled his eyes before sneering, “Oh, so sorry, Cap; here I thought we were looking to hire a new mechanic. Not picking up some eye candy.”

“She is our new mechanic; she’s the reason we weren’t screwed out of millions of berri for a new engine and instead just had to pay for a few new parts. She sure as fuck diagnosed the problem faster than Hikigaeru-ya ever could!”

The entire table’s expressions soured substantially at the name. All except Bepo who instead hung his head shamefully, the tips of his claws making soft clicks as they tapped together. He had nothing to be ashamed of, of course, but the polar bear Mink clearly still felt guilty. It had been three months since their former mechanic had been chained to a desolate rock in the middle of the ocean, his torso cut open to expose his organs and muscles to the hungry seabirds that flew overhead.

Cruel and unusual punishment? Yes, but the bastard had deserved it. The fucker had been smart enough to keep his racism against Minks mostly to himself for the six months he had sailed with them, but he’d belittled and tormented poor Bepo in private during his entire tenure as a Heart. And because Bepo was meek and a people-pleaser, he’d stayed quiet about it until Darter had brought up his concerns about the Mink’s increasingly depressive moods, and the captain finally made him spill the beans. No one should have had to endure that—least of all someone as good as Bepo.

Law was still kicking himself over not noticing that the now ex-mechanic had been mistreating Bepo. As much as he’d like to say anyone would have been fooled, the fact was he’d made a lot of mistakes since he and his friends had set out to sea two years ago. He’d been an angry sixteen-year-old with big plans for revenge. Even more aggressive and reckless at seventeen when he’d started making a name for himself but wasn’t seeing as much progress as he’d liked. That had unfortunately led to frustration, which led to more anger and recklessness, which had resulted in mistakes. Failures. His subordinates getting hurt both physically and emotionally. If nothing else, the realization that he’d failed to notice Bepo’s mistreatment for so long had been the wake-up call Law needed. As much as he wanted to destroy Joker and burn his empire to the ground, he had a duty to his subordinates. He’d never admit it aloud, but he loved those loyal idiots who were willing to follow him into Hell itself. He owed it to them to protect them as best he could. Starting with getting their submarine fixed and recruiting a mechanic that wasn’t a two-faced prick.

“Ok, let’s say she’s as skilled as you say. It’s true we need a mechanic, and those are in short supply. But the reason you sacked Hikigaeru wasn’t due of a lack of skill; it was because he was a massive dick to Bepo,” Penguin reminded him bluntly, crossing his arms across his chest. “You said you wouldn’t make the same mistake with his replacement.”

“I did and I’m not!” Law argued. It was true. With Hikigaeru, he’d been thinking only of the necessity of having a mechanic on board. He and the boys had managed to keep the Polar Tang running with the basic maintenance skills Wolfe had taught them, but it was vital to have someone who could actually repair a broken engine or diagnose problems. But he hadn’t considered the importance of assessing the man’s character as well as his skills. That had been a mistake, so this time, he was trusting both his brain and his gut. And they were both telling him that Ikkaku was perfect for the job and the crew.

Despite having just a secretarial job at the shipyard and being dressed in a crop top and shorts that should have guaranteed hypothermia, the girl had known her stuff. Her boss, Mr. Bowers, had told Law that the whole engine would need to be replaced—a costly job, to be sure. One any business would be thrilled to do for the amount of berri it would give them and would keep the Heart Pirates stuck on the dreary island for at least a week or two. But then Ikkaku had spoken up. Told Law that she did her own diagnostic, and the engine was easily fixed with just a few new parts that would cost him barely a tenth of what Mr. Bowers had estimated, and she could get it done herself in only four hours.

That had made quite the impression on Law. Ikkaku had risked her career to keep Law from getting swindled, standing up to an asshole boss for a guy she’d just met. He still wasn’t entirely sure why she did it; such altruism wasn’t exactly pirate-material. But she had guts, and the second she’d proven she could put her money where her mouth was and fix the engine as easily as she’d boasted, Law had already kind of staked his claim on her.

On top of that, Ikkaku had a quality that he’d realized the rest of the crew was sadly lacking—she was willing to call her superior out on his shit. As much as he loved the boys and how supportive they were, Law had come to realize that the Hearts were, at their worst, enablers. They always let him have his way. Darter cheered him on when he got sadistic and considered him an artist. Crozier was no-nonsense but firmly believed in following his captain’s orders regardless of whether they were the right ones. Malamute and Shiroiruka had been in a gang before joining him and eagerly did what their new boss told them to do. Not even his original trio of loyal misfits were willing to tell him “No” most of the time. Bepo was too meek while Penguin and Shachi still retained their fascination and hero worship from their younger years.

It figured that now, when he was actually getting his act together and found someone willing to give him some well-deserved shit, that his friends finally decided to push back. The irony annoyed him immensely.

“And yet the second she lays eyes on him, your new recruit literally shrieked in fear,” Shachi stated, bearing his pointed teeth aggressively. It was clear his defiance of his captain’s orders was solely due to his desire to protect Bepo, which Law could respect. He suspected much of it was due to guilt; he’d bullied Bepo in their youth, and even now still picked on him occasionally. Perhaps he’d seen too much of his younger self in Hikigaeru’s misbehavior. Perhaps he wished to make amends. A commendable reason, but sadly one that made him blind to the fact that Ikkaku wasn’t their enemy.

“Well, yeah! Most people are gonna be scared when coming face-to-face with a polar bear!” Law defended. Admittedly he did feel a bit guilty about that; he should have warned Ikkaku that the crew wasn’t entirely human, if only so Bepo wouldn’t feel self-conscious. He’d neglected to inform her as a joke—it was always funny to watch a newbie freak out when they were suddenly in the presence of a large bear in an orange jumpsuit. Usually, after some initial panic, they quickly realized he was basically a big teddy bear when it came to the crew. Only this time, Bepo’s skin wasn’t as thick. His wounds from Hikigaeru’s mistreatment were still too fresh. And he couldn’t have predicted that Ikkaku’s grandfather had been mauled by a polar bear in his youth and she’d grown up with nightmares from the story. Once again, he’d been reckless, though luckily his miscalculation hadn’t been too costly. Just some hurt feelings and misunderstandings that had been somewhat ironed out. Both parties had left the encounter shaken, but apologies had been exchanged, and Law was confident that his cute navigator would quickly endear himself to the new mechanic. Trauma aside, Ikkaku hadn’t seemed to care that he was a Mink, which was already a step up from Hikigaeru. In fact, she’d been quite contrite and ashamed of her reaction as Law had walked her to the edge of town after, asking him to pass on further apologies to Bepo and promises that she’d make it up to him.

Yes, Law had definitely screwed up with the introduction, but it had served to prove that he’d ultimately made the right decision with his new hire—he couldn’t remember ever hearing Hikigaeru apologize, even while the seagulls pecked out his liver. Mostly he’d just screamed, which had been quite the satisfying sound, but while Law had enjoyed it, it hadn’t really helped Bepo.

“I’m sorry,” the Mink whimpered, interrupting his train of thought.

“Ugh, you don’t need to apologize, Bepo,” he quickly amended, taking his feet off the table so he could reach across to pat his furry shoulder reassuringly. “She just wasn’t expecting to meet a bear. You’re an apex predator, remember? You’re supposed to be fuckin’ scary!”

“But I don’t want to scare my nakama,” the navigator replied, eyes watering a bit.

“And you won’t, because she’s not going to be nakama,” Shachi cut in, fists clenching. He hadn’t said two words to the new girl, but he’d already decided she didn’t belong, and nothing Law said would change his mind.

“Yeah, she is,” Law snapped, glaring at the redhead, practically daring him to keep defying his orders. It was getting more and more tempting to take him outside and beat the insolence out of him, but he refrained. Shachi standing up to him, especially in defense of Bepo, was ultimately a good thing, so he needed to solve this matter diplomatically. Or at least without physical violence. “I’m fetching her first thing tomorrow after she’s said her goodbyes and gotten her affairs in order. And even though she’s already apologized, the first thing I’ll have her do when she boards is apologize to Bepo again.”

“I’m not mad at her, Law,” the bear insisted, round ears drooping but expression a little less sad. “It’s not her fault she was scared of me. I’ll…I’ll give her some space for a few days so she can get used to everything, then maybe we could try again.”

While things weren’t going as smoothly as he’d hoped when this conversation started, at least Law seemed to be getting through to one of the trio. Considering how Bepo was the actual injured party in all this, his opinion held far more weight than the other two. Still, he’d rather have all three of them back on his side. Ikkaku didn’t need to come onto a ship full of hostility; he’d already seen her get dirty looks from her former colleagues, and he was sure he’d caught a few civilians glaring at her as they’d walked through town. He’d nearly insisted on escorting her the two miles through the moors to the lighthouse, but she’d claimed that she was safer outside of town than in.

She was a weird kid, but then again the island itself was pretty fucking weird. Joras was rather infamous among the North Blue. Stories of ancient horrors and the cultists who worshiped them were still told around the fireside to scare children. Arkham Hospital boasted incredible medical minds but also unethical practices. Lobster buoys were carved to look like grotesque human heads. The dead were cremated due to an alleged incident where corpses came back to life and wreaked havoc across the land. The birth rate of twins was unusually high, with some claiming they had psychic powers. Ten years ago, there had even been a plague that had caused the afflicted to go mad and bloodthirsty.

This island was fucked up, and Law could hardly wait to leave. Yes, places like the hospital were intriguing, but the fog was dense, the smell of fish and smog was far from appealing, and even he could say the feeling of paranoia and ennui that hung over most of the locals was extreme. It was clear Ikkaku didn’t belong here. Hell, she was the brightest, most vibrant thing he’d seen on the island, and he was looking forward to stealing her away from this place.

Now he just had to get the boys on the same page.

Turning towards his quartermaster, Law hoped Penguin would be more reasonable than Shachi. He’d always been a little bit calmer and more forward-thinking, even if his reckless streak was still a mile long. “Her completely understandable reaction to a polar bear aside, are you foreseeing any problems with my decision?” Not that it would change Law’s mind, of course, but if there was going to be a mutiny, he’d rather know what to look for so he could see it coming.

Mouth twisting in thought and irritation, Penguin replied, “Not to be sexist, but a woman aboard an all-male ship is gonna change the dynamic, Law. You’re smart enough to know that, right?”

“Lack of Y-chromosome or not, I’m expecting her to be treated the same as anyone else on the ship. Or did I recruit a bunch of brainless horndogs who only think with their dicks?”

“That’s not what I meant—”

“Good, because given how her old boss made her dress, I’m planning on giving her full permission to kick anyone that treats her like a piece of meat right in the balls. And I won’t be giving them painkillers after.”

All three boys winced. It was not an empty threat.

Clearing his throat, Penguin sought to explain himself. “I meant that having a girl around means a lot of adjustments are gonna have to be made. I doubt she’ll be comfortable bunking with any of the boys, so she’ll need her own quarters. For laundry rotation, is she going to be ok with somebody else washing her underwear and stuff? We have communal showers for fuck’s sake, Law. Even if none of us are attracted to her, it’s still going to be weird and awkward for everyone.”

“Me more than anyone else,” Law countered. Yes, he had considered the ramifications of a woman aboard the ship. He had to. He was the doctor, after all. “Don’t forget I’ll be giving her medical examinations, including some pretty female-specific ones.” Which reminded him, he’d need to brush up on birth control and pelvic exams and menstrual cycles. Luckily, he was hardly squeamish, though he could agree it would likely be a bit awkward to discuss these things with his new subordinate. But he’d meant what he’d said about her being treated the same as the rest of the crew, and that meant she’d be getting a full medical exam the moment they set out.

That did seem to mollify Penguin a little bit, as his shoulders relaxed and he sighed. “Alright, Captain. I’ll take your word for it that you’ve got everything all figured out.”

“Are you seriously gonna just roll over like that and let him win?” Shachi exclaimed.

“Hey, at least this way when it all goes to shit and Law looks like a fool, I get to rub it in his face and say ‘I told you so’ for once,” he chuckled, smirking at his captain. Yes, he still had his reservations, but if Law was really that fixated on making Ikkaku their engineer, there wasn’t really anyone who could stop him. Not even Ikkaku herself. If she’d refused his offer to join the Hearts, there was no doubt in Penguin’s mind that their next mission would involve kidnapping her before setting off for the next island.

Which, yeah, would be pretty shitty of them, but hey, they were pirates, after all. And at least their uniform was less ridiculous than what he’d first seen her in. Had Bowers really required her to dress like that? It was like he was trying to have her catch pneumonia or something. So really, this was beginning to feel more like a rescue. How unusually noble of his sadistic friend. The recent changes in Law’s habits and demeanor had not gone unnoticed by Penguin, and he was now curious to see how things would play out under this calmer, more forward-thinking Law.

Law could see the frustration lining Shachi’s face at having lost both his allies in this petty argument to his captain’s side. His own lips pursed in displeasure. It was an expression he usually saw in the midst of squabbles with Penguin; a sign the stubborn redhead wasn’t giving up the fight just yet, despite having clearly already lost.

Thankfully, before Shachi could start another argument, the tavern maid came over with their meals. She was pretty enough with a smile friendlier than most on the island, but like all servers, the sincerity of it could never be fully trusted. “Sorry it took so long, gents,” she said, setting down the heavy tray laden with plates of grilled fish, clam chowder, and steamed lobster. The cheap price for the latter had initially raised a few eyebrows, but the woman had explained that the surrounding seas in fact had an overabundance of the crustaceans, so it was rather common fare. “Had a feisty one in today’s catch. Nearly took the cook’s finger off. But I’m sure a group of strong lads like you are brave enough to brave these beasts,” she giggled, giving Law a flirtatious wink.

“If it’s already dead, I doubt much bravery’s needed,” Law said with a disinterested shrug, grabbing one of the pints of beer and a bowl of chowder, blatantly ignoring the roll that had come with it. “At least now we can shove food in Shachi’s face to shut him up.”

The redhead flipped him off in response, which Law nonchalantly returned.

“It’ll be ok, Shachi,” Bepo attempted to mollify as he eagerly tucked into a massive piece of fish. “It’s important that we have a good mechanic on the ship, and I trust Law’s judgement. And just because we had a rocky start doesn’t mean we won’t become friends. I mean, you and Penguin beat me up when we met, but we’re nakama now, right? Give her a chance.”

Both Penguin and Shachi tugged their hats over their eyes in shame while a small spike of guilt hit Law at the words. Fuck, Bepo was really too good. Yes, he was doing his best to not make another mistake that could hurt his navigator, but the fact that Bepo so easily trusted his decision despite his past fuckups proved that he really was a better friend than he rightly deserved. And he even forgave Penguin and Shachi for how they initially treated him and considered them his true companions. How was Bepo able to go through life having been hurt so often but not holding any grudges? It was a complete mystery to someone like him.

“Ya’ll hired a mechanic from around here?” the maid asked as she set out forks and spoons and knives for the table, not dissuaded by Law’s brush-off. It was her job to be charming, and there’d been plenty of gossip about the crew that had sailed in on a submarine of all things. Including an outrageous story that Mr. Bowers had gotten decapitated, but his head had still been talking and screaming even afterwards. That was odd, even by Joras’ standards. “Our docks have some of the best in the North. Even the Marines have come recruiting for bright lads to work on their new warships,” she added proudly.

Shachi quickly latched onto that little tidbit. “Hey Law, if your newbie’s so good, how come the Marines haven’t snatched her up?”

“Because she’s got taste,” he countered easily, taking a sip of chowder. Not really to his tastes, but it was hot and still better than anything he and the boys could make. Once they had their mechanic settled in, he should probably start looking for a proper cook.

“Probably took one look at those ugly Navy uniforms and said ‘Nah, man, I’d rather be a pirate and wear a badass boiler suit’,” Penguin joked, attempting to dissipate the tension. Really, this argument was getting tiresome. Law had already made it obvious he’d made his decision, and if Shachi wasn’t careful, he’d end up with worse punishment than laundry duty for insubordination. “I think you’re just worried that Ikkaku’ll wear it better than you.”

Before Shachi could deny it, there was a clatter as the tavern maid dropped one of the tankards of ale, eyes wide and jaw hanging as she stared at the young men sitting at her table.

“You…you’re pirates? Hiring the Light Keeper’s granddaughter?” the tavern maid asked. Her voice wasn’t especially loud, but apparently the horrified words had carried to the ears of every man in the building, with even the cook coming out to stare at them. The entire room went silent, full attention on the outsiders that had apparently committed some outrageous faux pas.

Law frowned and his brow furrowed in annoyance. He could tolerate being questioned by his oldest friends, but total strangers? A man could only put up with so much. If people kept bitching and moaning about his decision to take Ikkaku away, he might have to add some actual heads to the weird-ass buoys in the harbor. “Her old man is the lighthouse keeper, and yes, I’m hiring her,” he stated through clenched teeth, a vein on his jaw ticking with irritation.

“You seem surprised. Why? There something we should know?” Shachi asked, resting his chin in his palms as he leaned in intently. Finally, something to support his argument that the new girl was bad news! “Skeletons in her closet? Dark secrets she’s been keeping? Is she really an undercover Marine looking to infiltrate pirate crews?”

“Well, it’s just…”

“The girl’s cursed,” a grizzled fisherman a few tables over interrupted, turning in his seat to face the newcomers. He looked to be nearly eighty, though a life on the harsh North Blue waters easily could have aged him. “Aye, cursed since she were born. There’s a damn good reason she be named after a corpse whale, lads.”

“Oh, she’s killed someone?” Law asked, mildly amused. He had a literal serial killer in his employ, so that would hardly be enough to scare him away from making her part of his crew. Hell, if anything, he’d be impressed that she had a body count already. Made him more confident that she’d settle into pirate life easily.

“Her own twin brother. Took his life before he even left the womb.”

Four pairs of eyes blinked once. Twice. Three times in confusion. “That’s…it?”

“‘That’s it’?” the maid gasped, offended. “Twins are a sign of prosperity for a family. Her mother had already had one set, so a second would be twice as lucky. They were supposed to be a sign of great things to come. But instead, she was born and didn’t even have the grace to let her brother take his first breath! It should have been her that died!”

“Seriously?” Penguin asked, expression grim. “Unless you think a fetus could possibly have murderous intent, you people can’t possibly blame her for something like that. It’s tragic, sure, but it unfortunately happens, and it’s not anyone’s fault. Especially not the baby’s.”

“And why are you so upset that the girl lived? Shouldn’t the family just be happy one of the children is alive?” Bepo asked, already feeling sorry for Ikkaku. He understood that people with happy, comfortable lives usually didn’t set out to become pirates, but did people really believe she was a killer since the day she was born? And why was there so much emphasis being put on the fact that she was a girl?

“Blasted outsiders don’t know anything, do ya?” another man yelled, slamming his mug of beer onto the bar top with a furious thunk. This one was younger than the first, but was missing an eye and had the muscles that came from working long hours on the docks. “When a boy an’ a girl are born together, it means the lad is human, while the lass be the spawn of an Old One!”

There was a moment of dumbfounded silence before Law ran a tattooed hand over his face, torn between laughing at the absurdity and groaning in exasperation. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.” Well, perhaps not the stupidest, but easily the top ten in Law’s book. “Firstly, I could give a whole list of reasons why that ain’t medically possible. Second, I don’t give a shit about your eldritch horror gods, and Ikkaku being some tentacle monster’s kid sounds like something out of a bad penny dreadful.”

“Yeah,” Shachi admitted, enthusiasm fading. He didn’t approve of the new recruit, but he wasn’t going to buy into such weird slander out of defiance towards her recruitment. He’d rather have actual dirt he could use against her. In fact, he was beginning to understand why Ikkaku was so willing to sail away with a bunch of pirates. “‘Yo mama banged a tentacle god’ is a great insult, but you people can’t actually believe that shit, right?”

“And thirdly, even if any of that were true, what the fuck is the correlation between ‘eldritch baby’ and ‘dead twin brother’?” Law finished, though he did give Shachi a quick, approving smirk. Oh, he hoped the redhead used that jab against some Marine. Or maybe that Basil Hawkins guy he’d seen in the paper. The weird magician would probably be far more insulted than the average sailor. Or he’d take it as a compliment. Seemed like the kind of weird thing he’d do.

The tavern maid shifted uncomfortably while the men scoffed. “Yer all a bunch of damned fools,” the old fisherman grumbled. “The Old Ones knew her oldest brother is blessed. Knew he’ll go on to do great things an’ climb up the Navy ranks. That lad’ll finally bring honor to this island’s name, but the Old Ones don’t like that. So they planted that wretched seed in her mother’s womb an’ set her out into the world to sabotage him. Startin’ by draining the life from his youngest brother.”

“Too bad a strong, handsome, intelligent man like Ushi couldn’t be stopped by a mere cursed child,” the maid said, resting her cheek in her palm and sighing dreamily. “He’s the hero we’ve been waiting for. A future champion of justice and someone who will bring glory to Joras.”

Law snorted at her clear infatuation, though he tucked away the relevant information for later. Ikkaku had a brother in the Navy? This could be a problem. Though, from the sound of things, they weren’t close. He’d have to grill her about it once she was settled in. He had no intention of rescinding his offer over it, of course—he just needed to know if she’d need to stay out of the way should their paths cross.

Marine or not, siblings shouldn’t kill each other. It was a rule Law held true to. The idea of a pirate killing their Marine brother was not a memory he wished to relive, nor could he fathom an older brother hating his little sister.

Out of the corner of his eye, Law noticed Shachi pull out his brass knuckles and start polishing them with a napkin. Meanwhile, Penguin had begun playing with one of the dinner knives that had been provided with their meals. Bepo was still eating his fish, but his ears were perked up and swiveling around, alert for any sounds that could signal trouble. Golden eyes flicked down to where Kikoku leaned against the edge of the table, her cursed blade eager for the prospect of tasting blood.

His attention returned to the other patrons, who were muttering in agreement at the woman’s claims. The old fisherman nodded with approval, though his face was still lined with bitterness. “In the old days, even the merfolk would’ve shunned that girl. She would’ve been raised in isolation until she turned sixteen, then returned to the sea as a bride to the Great Dreamer.”

“You sure we can’t still do that?” the barkeep chuckled, though it held no mirth. “The Light Keeper’s been guarding her since she was six. Basically the same thing, living alone with a crazy old man and his dog for a decade. There’s still time, if you think drowning her will appease something.”

“Don’t think we need to, if this lot’s taking her,” the one-eyed worker noted, his attention returning to the pirates seated at the table. “Be doin’ us all a service, taking her out t’ sea with ya. Though, it’s on yer heads if the Great Dreamer claims yer ship because of it.”

A few men laughed, but the tavern maid’s face was lined with fright. “No, we can’t let them take her!” she exclaimed, grabbing the old man’s arm desperately. “Don’t you see? We can’t let her be associated with pirates! What about Ushi?”

“Ya think Ushi could be killed by a cursed pup like her?” the old man scoffed.

“She’s doesn’t have to,” the barkeep pointed out, rubbing his chin in thought. “If the Navy finds out his sister is a pirate, it could reflect badly on him. Maybe even prevent him from becoming an admiral.”

There was a murmur throughout the tavern, several men commiserating before the old man at last nodded solemnly. “Aye, yer right. The lass must’ve bewitched these fools into taking her along so she could fulfill her dark mission.”

“She hardly ‘bewitched’ me,” Law pointed out, setting down his now empty soup bowl and finally bothering to chime into this ridiculous conversation once more. “If you all hate her so much, I’ll gladly do everyone the favor of getting her the fuck away from you freaks. Call it my good deed for the century.”

His cheek only served to agitate the mob, though Law hardly cared. He didn’t owe these people or their beliefs a lick of respect. Really, this island had gone through a booming industrial revolution in the past fifty years, yet they still held onto backwards beliefs like this?

Yeah, Ikkaku was definitely better off with a gang of pirates.

“If ya take her, she could jeopardize everything,” the dock worker growled. “This island’s reputation has haunted us for too long. But that’s all gonna change! Ushi is the one who’ll banish those old ghosts and allow us t’ truly prosper.”

“You talk about getting rid of a shitty reputation, but you’re not exactly doing much to prove it wrong,” Law pointed out. “Which is it? Do you not believe in your old ways, or do you still think a girl is the spawn of some weird god? Or do you not actually believe that one but pay it lip service because you need a scapegoat so you have a reason for why your lives are so miserable?”

The atmosphere in the room grew even more tense, Law clearly having touched a nerve.

“We’ll give ya one chance,” the old man said coldly, ignoring the question. He stepped forward and drew a knife from his wool overcoat. He’d apparently taken up point as the ringleader, the rest of the small mob falling in line behind him. “You an’ yer crew sail out. Tonight. Leave the lass behind. We’ll deal with her like we shoulda done when she were first born.”

The rim of Law’s hat cast an ominous shadow as he stated, “Counteroffer; you all shut the fuck up and return to your seats. My crew and I finish up our business on the island, then we sail away. With Ikkaku, as our new mechanic.” He could hear Shachi grunt behind him, though it didn’t seem to be in disagreement; sure, he didn’t sound enthusiastic about it, but it was clear he’d accepted that, despite his complaints, Ikkaku was coming with them. “My next offer involves you fucks ending up as a pile of limbs, so you’d be smart to back down now.”

“Fools don’t know what yer dealin’ with,” the old man sneered, pointing the dagger at Law threateningly. “Cursed or not, a pirate in the family could destroy Ushi’s dream! We can’t let that happen!”

The other men in the tavern shouted in agreement and leapt to their feet. Law stood, hand outstretched and tattooed fingers flexing eagerly, when the old man’s call to battle was cut short by a red-haired blur and a loud crack as his jaw was broken by a well-placed punch to the jaw.

Apparently surprised that the pirates were choosing to fight back instead of just allowing themselves to die at the hands of an angry mob, there was a moment where the other men stood still, which was more than enough time for Penguin to throw his knife in a precise arch, the blade easily piercing the dock worker’s remaining eyeball, completely blinding him. He screamed, prompting the barkeeper to throw a pint glass at Law before attempting to run. However, the thick glass was easily batted aside by Bepo before it could even get close to his captain’s head. In fact, his massive paw hit the glass so hard it flew across the room into the cook’s face, shattering on impact and turning the flesh into a bloody mess.

Before his crew could get their hands any dirtier, Law’s Room expanded from his, filling the tavern with a blue glow. “Takt.” Everyone who wasn’t a Heart Pirate, from patron to employee, levitated in the air as if lifted by invisible marionette strings.

“You idiots made a big mistake,” he said, voice eerily calm as he looked them over, gold eyes calculating. Assessing. The surgeon preparing the first cut. As if sensing this, Bepo handed him Kikoku, the Ōdachi’s long blade gleaming as he drew her from her sheath. “I don’t care about your beliefs. I don’t care about your reputation. I don’t care your pathetic little lives. What I do care about is my crew.”

“We’ll leave you alone!” the tavern maid screamed, terrified tears streaming down her cheeks. “I promise, we don’t have any problem with you pirates! You don’t have to do this!”

“Oh, but we do. See, you didn’t just threaten us,” Law stated, gesturing to the young men standing behind him, who glared at the crowd ominously. “You threatened Ikkaku. She’s a Heart Pirate now. That puts her under my protection. And you idiots threatened her. Mistreated her. And if this Marine brother of hers has a problem with her career choice, well, he can take it up with her captain; Trafalgar Law.”

Kikoku sliced through the air a dozen times in quick succession, the sound of screams filling the room as his victims were cut to pieces, legs, arms, and heads spinning around like balloons in zero gravity. He twirled his fingers, grinning as the body parts spun around like they were caught in a tornado. As much as Law wanted to relish their cries of horror and agony, he was a practical man, so he made another cut to neatly carve out their vocal cords, dumping them into his empty chowder bowl. It wouldn’t do for the screams to draw attention to the tavern, otherwise the Hearts really would have to sail off early, assuming they didn’t massacre the whole town.

“It’s tempting to kill you,” he mused, letting the old man’s head drop into his waiting palm. Curious, he studied the mangled jaw; Shachi had landed a good punch, and he could see the indents of his brass knuckles in the skin. Maybe he should get a pair with some raised letters for added insult. Or better, the jolly roger. His Man-At-Arms deserved some custom brass knuckles as a reward for stepping up when it counted for his crew. He’d look into it later. “But honestly, I prefer leaving you all like this. You’ve got a hospital further inland, right? I’ll leave you as a fun puzzle to solve. Put your doctors’ skills to the test putting you all back together. Oh, though they’ll be missing a few key pieces.”

Dropping the head, he raised his hand once more, crooking his finger to draw the torsos towards him, lining them up like soldiers before slamming his palm against each of them. “Mes.” Out popped their hearts, neatly stored in perfect cubes, still beating rapidly with fear. “I’m taking these. Might as well make a profit while I’m here, right? These’ll go for at least what Bowers-ya tried to swindle me out of with his shitty diagnostic. Something I’ll never have to worry about again now that I’ve Ikkaku as my mechanic.”

Satisfied, Law dispelled his Room, allowing the twitching body parts to fall to the floor like hail, scattered throughout the room in a grisly scene. He had no pity for whatever poor soul would discover the carnage, nor the doctors that would likely spend days attempting to put everyone back together properly. They were all likely no better, considering how easily this lot had fallen into the mob mentality against Ikkaku.

People were scum. Not that he hadn’t known that since he was a child. The world simply seemed to delight in proving him right.

He was pulled from his thoughts by Penguin, who strolled up to him, empty potato sack in hand. “Found this in the storage room,” he explained, already scooping up the hearts on the floor like they were apples Law had shaken loose from a tree. “Figured we shouldn’t walk through town with armfuls of organs. Those tend to draw attention.”

That earned him a nod of approval. A quartermaster was in charge of managing supplies and cargo, and that included his captain’s unique way of earning berri when they weren’t raiding ships or hunting for treasure. Penguin could be an idiot sometimes, but he took his job seriously. They all did.

Law really was quite lucky to have people like them. Made the world seem a little less scummy.

“I still don’t like it,” Shachi grumbled, kicking one of the arms that was trying to crawl away so he wouldn’t have to look Law in the eye, “but I guess Ikkaku can come with us. No one deserves to be stuck in a place like this.”

“I wasn’t asking,” Law retorted, though he was glad he finally had all three of his loyal, foolish friends back on his side. And hopefully the new girl would quickly find her place among them, just as his other Hearts had.

“Heh, personally, I’m starting to think she’ll fit right in,” Penguin said, slinging the bag over his shoulder with a grin. “She’s just as much of a weirdo misfit as the rest of us. Who better for a tentacle god’s spawn to sail with than an unlicensed doctor with creepy powers, a serial killer, an artic survivalist, some former gang members, a talking polar bear, and whatever the hell Shachi is?”

The redhead punched him in the arm. “Notice you didn’t put yourself in that list of weirdo freaks.”

“That’s because I’m the only one who isn’t a weirdo freak. Which in itself makes me a weirdo freak.”

While the two bickered, Bepo walked over to Law, smiling a bit. “I’m with Penguin,” he said softly. “She belongs with us. I think once she’s settled in, we’ll get along just fine.” Yes, there had been fear in the girl’s eyes when they met, but no hatred. No disdain. And once she’d calmed down, he’d seen other things, like curiosity and that gleam he’d seen in Law’s eyes when he thought he was being cute but didn’t want to admit it. And if his captain had taken to someone so quickly, he knew Ikkaku was good people. He had faith in Law’s judgement.

“If I am wrong about her, and she mistreats you, I’m ordering you to tell me,” Law warned, though he reached out to gently scratch behind the Mink’s ear, earning him a happy growl. He refused to make the same mistake twice, especially if it hurt his crew. But his gut told him he wouldn’t have to worry this time. Shachi would no doubt be watching her like a hawk, and hopefully Bepo would be more confident coming forward with his problems. His crew was risking it all to follow him on his quest—the least he could do was ensure they were happy.

He had a sudden, amusing vision of having the Polar Tang submerge while still in sight of the island so perhaps people would believe some ocean deity really had taken her. Then, assuming she was up for it, he’d ensure she got a bounty and a decent poster that could be mailed to Joras. Make the superstitious fools believe Ikkaku had risen from the depths to continue her god’s “mission” while at the same time causing some political trouble for her Marine brother.

Chuckling to himself, he slung an arm around Shachi’s shoulder, smirking a bit when the redhead grumbled that it wasn’t fair his younger friend was now taller than him. “Let’s get back to the Tang. You and Penguin need to set up Ikkaku’s new quarters, and Bepo’s gonna help me dig up a uniform in her size. Oh, and you can also clean and polish Hikigaeru-ya’s tools so they shine like new. He won’t be needing them anymore, and they’ll make a nice welcome gift from you to her.”

Shachi rolled his eyes but didn’t argue. He knew of all the punishments his insubordination could have gotten him, this one was merely petty rather than cruel.

Satisfied, Law led Penguin, Shachi, and Bepo back out into the cold, thick fog of Joras, pausing only to flip around the sign hanging on the Big Daddy’s door from OPEN to CLOSED.

[kaorimiyazonotl]

Back To You

Chapter one

When they asked if I ever got out of being sad after everything, it became hard for me to smile and admit the truth. So I half lied and half stated the truth. My girls were never going to find out that I’ve been talking to him behind their backs.

I wouldn’t accept it. Dominic was my friend and he was now my ex. I lay there on my bed staring at the ceiling and then my alarm goes off. Knock knock, I turn to the side and see Hikari and Kora in my door frame.

“Get up, sleepy head!” as Kora jumps on my bed.

“Just because it’s the weekend doesn’t mean you get to lay here all day”, Hikari pulling my sheets while I’m scowling at her. “I don’t care if it’s the weekend, I don't want to get up.” The thing is I rather dream and not be in reality. I work as the manager for San Francisco Library, it’s a quiet, settled job, but it comforts me…physically. And when it’s the weekend that’s when I get in my head and I wanna sleep more or write or read or even paint.

Kora sets herself next to me as I’m sitting up with my sheets and blankets on the floor. “Come on, today is Saturday and we gotta check out this new Italian restaurant that Weston just opened.” Weston is an old friend of ours, just as Catie, Catherin, Lilith, and Piper. All of us went to the same high school and went to different colleges but I got to live with Hikari and Kora because we all decided we were gonna go to college in San Francisco. We fell in love with the city, so not only are we roomies but best friends as well.

“Yes, so get up Amaya!” says Hikari

“Okay fine, but what time?”

They both look at me out of shock because usually I put up a fight because I need a good reason but I’m too tired to fight with them. But they smile and say “seven o’clock”. seven p.m. Tonight, will I see him? That's the thing I've worried about ever since I left Santa Clarita and decided to live with the girls. I didn’t even think about what would happen, I just did it because I planned it. While I was even in Santa Clarita, I never once ran into D. I stopped caring when it became August but you know I always did search for something.

“So now that I'm up I’m gonna take my morning walk, anyone wanna come?”

“Sorry, me and Ray are supposed to have brunch at ten?”. I look at the clock and it’s eight-thirty. “Really?”

“What? I need time to pick an outfit, besides I wanna do my makeup too.” Ray and Kora have been with each other for two months now, Ray’s nice, he’s sweet, trans and all, pretty chill guy. I’m not that close with him though unlike Hikari.

“And you Hikari?” She’s grinning at me and when she grins, I know she’s going to have brunch with Enzo, now they’ve only been seeing each other for less than a month. I saw that coming when she introduced him to everyone during our last hangout. That was a month ago too.

Sigh “Have fun you two, I’ll be here when you guys get back.” They both sit by side and give me a kiss on the forehead and a hug.

“Love you!”

“Love you too, now go both of you.”

I lay back on my bed, staring at the ceiling for a bit. If I’m smart enough I would get up right now before I start getting into my head and start crying. When my therapist diagnosed me with depression and anxiety, I wasn’t surprised. I sorta figured given the fact that for three months I didn’t stop crying and listening to music twenty four seven. I guess the only difference now is I’m trying to get past the relationship and trying to accept and deal with it without feeling so sad and guilty. I know people have their own process of dealing with things. I know it’s gonna take time for me. I get off my bed, head to my bathroom, boom, boom, boom, wide awake now, hair up and still in my pj’s. I check my calendar to see if I have anything planned before dinner. Nope pretty much cleared.

I make myself some blueberry pancakes, with a side of eggs and sourdough toast and tea. When the girls saw me making breakfast one morning, they started calling me “Mom” again. Hard to believe I used to be called that when we were all in high school, five years ago to be exact. I check my phone and I get a text from Lilith.

Lilith: Amaya I found this essential oil store called Saje Natural Wellness on Wilmot street. Wanna check it out?

With Lilith, her and I can totally do a spa day together any day. Lilith is very calm, funny, sweet, and helpful. However her therapeutic way of coping is working out and doing what’s good for the body. I'm all for supporting her but for me it’s not my style so I don’t know what works for me. So I text her back thinking what's around there to check out after.

Me: Sure, then we could check out this french-american bakery called La Boulangerie, it’s five minutes away from the wellness place.

We meet up, talk a walk and window shop and talk about all the things like improving our skin and trying out new things to help our skin. Lilith is sorta spiritual and sorta not, but she believes that people should focus on themselves first before anything, even before joining the dating life.

She’s not wrong, I mean I always found myself to be mentally unstable and unable to function because I say I’m not fit to be in a relationship.

“Amaya, so what are you gonna wear to Weston opening?” says Lilith as she takes a sip of her sparkling water. We stopped at the bakery after window shopping and checking out the wellness place.

It's cute and pretty packed and their pastries are delicious. I’d think I’d stop by here by myself next time and take my book with me. Or maybe take inspiration and write something.

“Well I haven’t thought about it yet, if it's the Grand Opening then probably something that fits the vibe for a dinner night.” One thing about me and my wardrobe is it has to fit the vibe and from head to toe; hair, outfit, makeup, jewelry, shoes. I don’t dress to impress…maybe a little bit. I like to match and go with the vibe and not be out of place. I’ve been like that ever since I was little and it’s partially because of my dad. He always told my sisters and I to never go out unless we wore proper clothing. It didn’t matter if it was a BBQ or someone’s birthday, he always wanted us to dress accordingly. To this day he’s still the same.

“Okay true, but it’s an Italian restaurant not a dinner party. I was thinking not too fancy but something nice. Besides, it's gonna be a good night.”

“Yeah, you're right.” I give her my simple smile and drink my vanilla bean latte.

“Have you heard from D? Rumor has it he got a girlfriend.”

“I know, I heard too. I’m sure he’ll bring her to the opening.”

“He is.” I look at her in shock, I probably look pale or perhaps sad almost. It’s been years since he and I haven’t seen each other and I only just talked to him a little bit just last week. If there’s one word to describe Dominic it would be the abnormal and the complete opposite or just different.

The thing is I don’t know how to feel. I would think that by now I feel okay because it’s been a year already. But I guess I’m lying to myself, if I’m trying to deny the fact that I still miss him and everything.

“Lilith. It’s been years and things have changed, besides I’m still trying to focus on myself.”

“You know when you lie I can see it in your eyes right? We’ve been friends for a long ass time, you can’t fool me and you sure as hell can’t fool yourself.”

She’s right and it’s obvious that I’m hurt by it. So it won’t change the fact that I’m trying to hide it. I decided to tell her and her only that we’ve been talking. And tell her everything up until this point.

“Well that was a bitchy move for not telling you.”

“Yeah, it was. But I’m the fool for even talking to him in the first place.”

“Girly, before the whole break-up you guys were close, if being friends is what you wanted in the beginning then no one has the right to judge you or your decisions.”

“Thank you Lilith.”

We leave the cafe, Lilith leaves and then I take my route. I could go home but instead I go to Boudin Bakery, it takes ten minutes if I take Franklin St. and then Post St. But around that area it’s always packed and full of traffic. But because I got nothing better to do I do it.

I managed to find a parking spot after fifteen minutes. And of course the line to get inside the bakery is long. I mean duh it’s famous of course. I could get a sandwich but really I just got two loafs of fresh baked sourdough bread. I’m a big bread eater but it never affected my health. I walk out and head to my car. Just as I was about to get inside. A familiar voice appears.

“Amaya?”

I turn slowly even though I know it’s him, D, Dominic himself, in front of me.

“You still have a thing for appearing out of nowhere sir.” It’s my sarcastic and confident tone I give him but he reads me like a book, so it's easy to predict what I’m feeling. That was one of the things I loved about him. The ability to read someone so easily sometimes I never had to explain myself.

“I see you haven’t changed.” says Dominic, acting as normal as possible.

“Well, what’s there to change? I still write, work at the library and live with Hikari and Kora.” I say with a smart tone, although I don’t mean to, knowing that I sounded a bit rude.

“Sorry, what are you doing over here?”

“Uh..came to buy bread, same as you. Vanessa wants to try this recipe she found.” He’s acting a bit awkward and I know who he’s referring to too. So I try to sound unbothered but I know it won’t work.

“Oh, your girlfriend right? I heard congrats.”

“Thanks…I guess. How about you, seeing anyone lately?”

“No, I’ve been trying to focus on myself and mental well being.” I want this awkwardness to stop because I feel like crying. I have so many questions for him. Why? Why her? Why not me? Didn’t you love me? Didn’t you tell me you’d wait for me? But I keep quiet.

“Are you bringing her to Westons opening?” I try to change the subject and start an actual small conversation with him.

“No, she has work.”

“Ah, I see going solo then.”

“Well with or without her I wouldn’t miss my best friend/brother’s grand opening of his new restaurant. What kind of friend do you think I am?”

“The crazy kind actually.”

It’s true because I only have three words to describe this man in front of me, crazy, reckless, and a risk taker. Even when we were in highschool together he’d be that kind of person who brings everyone together. The fun one. Him and Weston go way back too, starting off as best friends and now brothers. For every adventure that these two plan together it’s always exciting to see what they talk about and come up with. Weston was there during the break up too, I showed up at his place asking if I could come in the night it happened. Chelsea, Weston’s wife, made me tea and I told them what happened. I cried my eyes out for twenty minutes straight by the time I was done crying my eyes hurt so much and I still had to drive my ass home. But even after he still treats me the same and I always tell him thank you.

“I’ll be seeing you at Westons then Amaya.” I stare deeply into his eyes and replay the way he says my name, it has me almost falling to my knees. He turns to walk away. I don’t want him to go. I want to talk to him longer.

“Do you wanna grab a coffee?”

He looks back “Sure, I got time to kill anyway.”

What are the chances of this happening to me? I’m lost in so many ways that it’s unbelievable that I asked him to get a coffee just to spend more time with him. I ask how he’s doing, what his job is now, he answers calmly, tells me that things have been okay, he moved out of Santa Clarita as well. Now he lives here.

If I ask if they live together, is it gonna make me jealous or depressed? “Do you and Vanessa live together? You know since you moved here?”

“No, I live by myself. Why?” He looks at me like I’m up to something.

“Just asking,” I smile. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

We stopped walking, we looked out at the cars passing by, we happened to end up at Kearny St.

“If I told you..I would have hurt you..” He’s not wrong besides I’m the one that broke it off to begin with.

I know back then I was in the wrong. I did it because I was stressed, under pressure and I didn’t know how to be in a relationship. I spent a long time not being in a relationship, so he was my first. I went too fast and I didn’t love myself at the time either. My mother and I got into countless arguments and my dad practically stopped talking to me. I felt guilty and I was eighteen back then, I still lived with my parents and I broke the rules. I was lucky that I wasn’t kicked out. So how can I answer the one I love right in front of me?

“You're right, I would’ve been hurt. But you not telling me hurts more.” I start to tear up, I hold back from breaking. D comes closer and hugs me, I’m falling, I break and begin to cry.

“I missed you okay, I fucked up back then, I’m sorry, I didn’t want to lose the kind of friendship we had.”

“Amaya, I’m sorry, I didn’t think about your feelings, I just assumed you’d be okay. And I missed you too.”

The way he can just comfort me and still show affection towards me feels like nothing has changed. But I can’t be fooled, for he is not mine anymore. I break the hug and step back, wipe my tears.

“I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing? You have nothing to apologize for.” I really don’t, I just apologize for no reason sometimes and it’s a habit because I don’t like being in the wrong and making mistakes. I still have more questions about him and Vanessa but I don’t want to ask, it makes me sick rather than happy. But we’re friends so it’d be rude not to ask.

“So how are you and Vanessa?”

He doesn’t answer for a good minute, he just stares at the ground and kicks a pebble.

“Uh..it’s not all smiles and good times if that’s what you're asking?” Dominic’s response was sarcastic. I’m curious because what if it was a mistake? What if he didn’t want to be with her? But I could be wrong.

“Really? How so?”

“Let me summarize it for you, sometimes there are days where she and I don’t get along…Do you remember when I started texting you at random?”

How could I forget? I was either taking a bath, writing or even watching anime. It was like he’d just popped up out of nowhere but it made me smile because I still loved it.

“Yes, why?”

“It was because during those times she and I would get into arguments or I’d get sad about something and she wouldn’t do anything about it…She doesn’t know how to help me like you do Amaya.”

“That was why? But how do I help you?”

“Your comforting, always has been, you know how to get me out of being sad or upset. You know how to comfort others when they’re feeling down and it shows that you care.” D continues.

“She’s toxic, she doesn’t know how to help, sometimes she just leaves me and then we spend a week not talking until she wants to spend time with me.” Who is she? Why did he put himself in this position?

He tells me that after the break-up it left a lot of scars, his depression was bad during that time, he drank and started going to parties. He dropped out of college. But he didn’t say where. And then when he met Vanessa it was just to try something new.

I’m shocked because he never did this. How much did I hurt him for shit to go down hill? I feel so guilty for doing this to him.

“I’m sorry D..I-”

“Hey, it gave me time to think about life. But I quit drinking and I haven’t been out in awhile.”

“And college? What about that?”

Sigh “After talking to the councilor they said that we could work something out and I’ll be taking classes at night…I started last month.”

“That’s good, I’m happy for you..What major are you doing though?”

“Landscape Architecture.” I smile so big, I immediately give him a hug, he’s shocked but he hugs me back.

Before we graduated high school, I had asked him what he wanted to do. He had said that he wanted to go to college but he didn’t know what to pursue. He said that he’d find out once he’d get there. So knowing that he picked a major makes me so happy because he could make art out of landscapes. I mean take a look at the Jewel at Changi Airport, in Singapore. It’s beyond what you could imagine.

“Congratulations, I’m so proud of you!”

“Thank you”

We talk some more and before you know it, it’s time to head home. But just before we parted ways while going back to my car. He says,

“It was good talking to you again Amaya.”

I simply give him a smile and answer “I’ll see you later.”

Coming home the drive wasn’t bad, the memory and thought of running into D again replays in my head and I think to myself today was a good day. I’m still iffy about his new girlfriend Vanessa. I say this because I care about him and I don’t want him to get into something that he doesn’t know how to deal with.

For as long as I can remember Dominic has always been sensitive and unsure about the women he’s with. And you would think that if you’re hurt you’d end your relationship if you're with someone that you don’t have that many feelings with or if they’re hurting you. But he has told me before and his philosophy is he won’t be the first one to break the relationship without a good amount of reasons to need to.

Though time and time again he’s never been the first one to break off the relationship, except once, that was six years ago. It’s always been mind blowing to me because he hurts himself more by putting himself in a situation like that but he told me that people who break off the relationship first hurt more than the ones being hurt.

It doesn’t make any sense but I tried to not argue with him on that. There are things that he and I don’t agree on and things that don’t make any sense sometimes. But I can get along with him and have fun.

When we did date we would do the most crazy things and stay up late talking for hours, those were the type of things I’d look forward too, knowing that I can go to someone after work, knowing that someone was waiting for me when I’d come home and knowing that I had someone who’s come to me when they were done with work as well.

But things changed. He and I both changed. I just hope it doesn’t get to me because he’s in a relationship now and he’s going to be there at Weston’s opening only this time everyone will be there.