#he thought playing the main character would not come with any consequences

[kat-shii]

His wisdom dropped after that. /j

Forever LOLing at leanders green eye shines. Like u have got to have fucked urself up at a fundamental level for that

[wild-fern21]

Paring: Voice actor!reader x Ollie Bearman

Synopsis: Ollie had always supported his girlfriend in her dreams so when she started voice acting in game he decided to make a series of it on twitch for his veiwer's to enjoy or three Ollie Bearman played his girlfriends games on stream.

Warnings: This is my first fic, I don't really know where I was going with this but yeah, if you have any tips or critiques please let me know, thank you for reading.

When you and Ollie started dating, Ollie took it upon himself to watch all the shows you were in. He couldn’t be prouder of his girlfriend but she had stepped away from shows and gone into to video games. Her more recent games were all in the more darker category. Which Ollie himself was to afraid to go though alone. So when one of his friends suggested making a stream out of it he couldn’t deny it. 

Until Dawn (remastered)

Your first video game was called Until dawn you play a character named Ashley, she is one of the eight main characters in the game, so Ollie thought he would give it a go, not wanting to spoil the game for himself he kept away from the trailers and any media to do with the game. 

As he played though the game eventually you came and sat next to him causing chat to go wild. As he made his way though the chapters he grew strong opinions on certain characters (Chris) and got attached to characters (Ashley). 

He had made it to chapter nine and so far had killed Jessica in the fourth character by not taking the shortcut causing the wendigo to tear her jaw off, and Chris who he swears he did by accident. (you knew it was on purpose by the tone of his voice). Now he was playing as Ashley in chapter nine.

You knew what was coming up and tried to keep the smile off your face as he got to the deciding options. 

“What should I do?” Ollie asked looking at you as he noticed your smile. “What are you smiling at?” he added with a nervous laugh following.

“It’s up to you?” You say hiding your face in you knees, so he couldn’t see you face.

“No, no don’t do that." He shook his head as you kept silent. He turned your chair so your body was facing him, you look up to him smiling. “Can you give me a hint?” you shook you head, Ollie let out a sigh and looked at his streams chat.

They were a mixture between going to look for the voice or joining the group. “I guess I should pick” He spoke as he moved the controller to the option to ‘investigate voice’ as soon as it had been selected, you move your chair closer to his.

Ollie turns his head “What? Was the wrong choice?” he asked looking back and forth from your face and the screen. As he walks down the path slowly trying to ready himself for what was to come. He walks over to the trapdoor which he had to open. He looks at your face which is badly concealing a smile at what was to come.

Ollie watched the screen ignoring chat he let out a sigh of relief when nothing was seen “What were-” the sentence was interrupted by his own yell he let out a staring of no’s as he watched in game you get her neck twisted. 

His face turned pale when as he watched your body land on the floor as Ashley’s head get thrown to the floor he turns to face you, he grabs the arm of your chair then dragging the chair till it was right next to him. 

Then he wrapped his arms around your waist hiding his face in the junction between you shoulder and neck, “You didn’t warn me” He whined. Chat was freaking out at the cute moment they were witnessing.

“It’s a horror game the whole point is to be scared” you pointed out, Ollie shook his head his curls tickling your neck. 

The two of you stayed like that for a few more minutes, until Ollie pulled away as he went back to the game he made sure to keep a hold of your hand for the rest of the game.

2. Detroit become human 

The next game Ollie wanted to play was similar to Until dawn in the way your choices have consequences. After Until Dawn, Ollie was determined to keep your character alive. Your character, Kara was one of the androids. Your character served another character named Todd and had a daughter figure named Alice.

Ollie decided against streaming this game just wanting to spend time with you, to relax and not have to worry about entertaining an audience, he had you sitting in between his legs leaning against his chest so he head could comfortably rest his head on top of yours. His arms were wrapped around your middle so he could hold the controller and you at the same time. The position made you feel safe as you could hear him muttering the options he could make under your breath.

As Ollie went though the game his hatred for Todd grew. But he was also worried that if he had the option to kill Todd it may end up killing Kara. Which Ollie swore that he wouldn't do.

As Ollie managed to get Kara and Alice out of the house and on to the bus, you could hear his heart beating faster, so you leaned your head up and placed a gentle kiss to the bottom of his jaw, before going back to watching the game.

He had successfully made it to chapter thirteen. He had managed to keep Kara and Alice alive, you watched as Kara and Alice ran into the highway. Ollie though not new to gaming was horrible when it came to QTE’s. So after he failed almost all of them you realized what was bout to show on screen.

You and Ollie both watched as Connor ran onto the road and grab Kara’s arm and try to restrain her, you watched as he managed to fail one QTE but save the other, though it was no way that would save your character.

“Watch out Kara” Alice in game yelled as your character got hit by a bus, Ollie let out an annoyed huff, he had some how managed to kill you again. Then he watched as Alice ran onto the road as the scene changed Ollie moved his head to your ear.

“You need to stop acting as character’s who die, I don’t think my heart can take it” he whispered, you let out a small laugh in reply shaking your head as you stood up.

“Or your just bad at these types of games” You tell him teasingly.

3. The Last Of Us II

The next (and last) game Ollie played of yours was The Last Of Us, he decided to make a series out of streaming it. Your character Abby was one of the protagonists, by this point in time Ollie was some what use to dying as Abby, he knew he wasn’t the best at keeping any character alive.

So as you sat in your shared room watching his streams on the tv, you couldn't help but shake your head as he complained about killing Abby again. The viewer's continuously made fun of the young driver at the amount of time he had died during this one section.

He had eventually called you into the room claiming you were his good luck charm, when really he just missed you. As Ollie got though another fight (barley) he turned to you with a giant smile on his face.

“I did it” he said while putting his hands up in celebration. At this point he was ignoring the cut scene which was happening right behind him. Your smile widened as he opened his arms offering you a spot on his lap, you gratefully took it.

You watched as Ollie continued to progress though the game laughing every time he died much like his viewer's. After Ollie failed to kill a clicker that was chasing him he looked at you playfully annoyed as you laughed.

“If your gonna laugh, then you have to play” he said handing the controller over to the you.

“No, It’s your stream you have to play” You spoke pushing the controlled back while letting out a small laugh.

“No, no if your going to sit there and laugh then you have a go” He told you a fake serious tone. 

You shook your head in disagreement but still grabbed the remote deciding to have a shot yourself at the game.

[somerandomdudelmao]

Ok, so, some marble sky thoughts? Character analysis? Whatever this is! 

I think the only reason that both Oscar and Ward are still alive is because Oscar was left to his own devices with the marmors. 

There are several contributing factors to this thought, but I think it boils down to two main factors: friendliness (towards the marmors), and morality.

First point: as far as i can tell, Oscar genuinely cares about Ecliptica to some extent. My example is when he clubbed that teegardian–the look on his face, and how fast he reacted, suggest that he reacted on gut instinct because Ecliptica was in danger, not that he had a cunning plan to make himself look better. As well as the fact that he genuinely seems to enjoy being around her, and voluntarily spends time with her–I think that this has convinced (some) of the marmors that Oscar is trustworthy, or at the very least not a threat.

On the other hand, Ward has shown that so far at least, he does not like or trust any of the marmors. Now I certainly can’t blame him for that, but it doesn’t do much towards gaining him any favor in the marmor’s eyes (or, sensor things).

My next point is that Ward seems to have a very strong moral code, and acts according to that code regardless of consequences, which restricts him in a way that Oscar doesn’t seem to be restricted. With the teegardian situation, I think Ward would either have straight up refused to be a hunting dog, or tried to help the teegardians, resulting in getting himself killed. 

On the other hand, Oscar, by playing along with the marmors and siding against the teegardians, managed to get into good enough graces with Ecliptica to be able to help Ward (and Holly). Now, I don't think Oscar lacks a moral code, or is trying to be evil or anything–I think he is doing everything he can to protect the people he cares about, and to stay alive. So far, he’s been pretty darn effective too. I also can’t blame him for prioritizing his life, and the life of his friend, over those of complete strangers, especially in such a morally gray area of how intelligent of a species is it ok to eat, and how to define intelligence at all. 

Oscar seems to be doing whatever he feels he needs to in order to keep himself and the people he cares about alive, regardless of “right” and “wrong”. 

Ward also seems to want to keep them both alive, but in contrast he is very attached to his idea of morality, defending what he believes to be right, and fighting against what he believes is wrong.

Because of this, I think Ward and Oscar would have (and probably will in the future) come into conflict because of their different ways of doing things, potentially really messing up each other’s various plans and ideas, in ways that are not conducive towards staying alive and/or friends. 

Also, unrelated theory, Ward is absolutely about to polymorph into an alien cyborg bc of whatever it was that Sculptor did to him

OH THIS

THIS IS SOME REALLY INTERESTING THOUGHTS RIGHT HERE >:D

[toffeebrews]

eughhh sleepiness is taking over must write about inky boy. ink sans is by @/comyet

i think upon reanalyzing some asks and the FAQ i have begun to understand how inks err emotions work a little better. a bunch of this is me kinda theorizing sooo yeah. it's not as uhh clear as my other rants are

His emotions aren't really "fake". at least my definition of fake. He still feels.

Instead, their main struggle is to balance and understand his emotions. Like in this ask:

So, he can definitely have quote on quote "normal relationships" with other people

One day you may ask him and he'll be like yeah i care about them alot and the next he doesn't feel very attached at all. As i interpreted "not making sense" as to not understanding why or how he even cares for these people. It seems really dependent on his internal emotional balance. The pretending comes in to play where he may exaggerate or lie about his emotions. Perhaps because he himself wants to have these attachments. Or because he wants to spare others feelings.

more yappage under the cut

According to his FAQ, he realizes his soullessness is an advantage (and theres not any realistic/non morally dubious means to obtain one) and wouldn't change that. However, i don't believe he is completely content with some of the drawbacks. He feels the need to hide his soullessness, as indicated in his design notes. But it "shows through". He feels the need to "pretend to have a soul" -from his backstory comic. This may be because he feels insecure in some way. believing his own emotions are less than others. Or his feelings are invalid or fake because he doesn't have a soul. Or at the very least not as real as others. Because he doesn't feel emotions the way others do, it must be wrong. Because hes chaotic neutral, i don't think these are things others contributed to his line of thought. Rather, something hes internalized himself. not that he would ever tell anyone that.

He may also hide this fact not the freak people out. Man does enjoy a bit of mischief, but it probably be kinda hard to work with other people if you have a large chance they may be scared of/don't trust you. I also think he doesn't actually want to like...petrify people. Which i would imagine many monsters would struggle, if they knew. given what people may assume of him. Or at least that's what he thinks ig shsksh.

Given he fears loneliness i think both of these reasons may contribute. He doesn't want people to abandon him. abandonment issues caused by trauma he can't remember.

But he can definitely feel extremes as well. being "overexcited" so much so he forgets consequences. He vomits up ink when shocked or overly passionate. I didn't expand on this as much because i feel like others have explained better than i ever could.

as his FAQ indicates his emotions can be separate from his morality. so its not necessarily contradictory for him to have these big emotions but still have uhh ig a more neutral way of looking at things. ig

btw this post was inspired from this analysis!! i tried to add my own spin on my commentary

[drspencereidshairtie]

Season Four of The Umbrella Academy was really really something for me because I had disliked lila since the very second they first introduced her. I remember being actively relieved when the show confirmed my suspicions about her, because i had felt a bit bad at first for judging her for no tangible reason.

I never really warmed up to her, in fact i actively hated her by the end of season two (which only went on to get 50x worse in season three with the whole he's our son / just kidding / whoops he's dead / haha im pregnant by the way thing) and then of course season four happened.

I actually almost kinda liked mom!lila. I was like oh, she can be human. She CAN be likeable. Maybe, just maybe, she's not a monster. I liked her new dynamic with Diego, and i enjoyed seeing her being a stressed, caring, normal mom and having a mundane life...for about two seconds. Then the whole 'book club / not book club / let him think I'm CHEATING on him' thing happened, and i was swiftly reminded that there was a reason i didn't like Lila.

Then she gets a power. It was actually a chance for her to be interesting and have character growth beyond just being a mom and wife. They could have used her to show what it's like when marigold interacts with someone who's never before had powers; they could have had some kind of fun training montage, like they did with Klaus and Reginald in season three when he discovered his immortality; and they SHOULD have done something of consequence with it, like having her accidentally hurt someone, or damage something important, idfk but, like, literally fucking anything!!!????!!!!???!!!!??? 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Instead, they just gave her stupid useless eye lasers that she uses about three times, can't control at all, and never comes up again. And it feels like they did it because they knew Lila was a weak character that couldn't stand on her own without the context of the rest of the umbrella academy, so they had to kinda 'even out the playing field' somewhat, even if it defied any and all logic and reason.*

Which, in my case at least, was an unfortunate choice. The one thing I'd actually somewhat liked about Lila was that, despite her personality and history, she was, for all intents and purposes, just an average human. I like seeing regular people in shows about abnormal folk. They give a nice context to the chaos, even if they too are 'chaotic' characters, you know?

Just when I thought she couldn't get worse.........well. I don't think i have to explain what happened. It was so much worse because Five had always been one of my favourite characters and OH MY GOD,,,,,,, HE WOULD NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER DO THAT! HE WOULD NOT DO THAT???? And you know I'm not just saying that in a delusional 'i know him better than the writers do' fan way, because pretty much everyone is in agreement.

He LITERALLY would not fucking do that. ESPECIALLY with Lila, who he's always disliked at best and actively tried to KILL at worst, and especially not now that she's his BROTHER'S WIFE and not to mention the MOTHER OF HIS BROTHER'S CHILDREN????

Anyway, that was my final nail. I no longer just hated Lila and passively wished she hadn't been added to the show, I wanted her dead. I wanted her to be killed off, or have something happen where five returned to the correct timeline but Lila couldn't for some reason, I just wanted her gone and SOON. I think it was probably what killed season four for most people, not just me. I think that if Lila had never existed, or at least hadn't made it to season four, or hadn't gone with five and................

If that hadn't happened, I think it could have been salvageable, even despite the one million and one problems with the season.

TL;DR: I genuinely, truly, deeply believe that the main issue with season four of the umbrella academy was the overarching existence of one 'Lila Pitts.'

(Don't even get me started on her almost jeopardising everything at the last moment in the final episode. I almost broke something in sheer frustration, because OH MY GOD we literally don't have time for this the world is ending infinitely and your life is not more important than the life of a single slug muchless the lives of BILLIONS of people- deep breaths, dustyn. Deep breaths.)

[vasito-de-leche]

Ooooh, just saw your Self Aware!6 and I love how you portrayed him! You mentioned that he can hear the player, but not see them, right?

What if 6 encounters a player who has him as their favorite character (yk putting him as the main character in the interface), hearing them gushing about how 6 looks so handsome and how they prefer him over 37 and the people at Apeiron, mumbling about how he doesn't deserve the trouble, and actually rooting for him reading his event story? Basically just talking about him, unaware that 6 could actually hear them.

Anyways, I'll let you cook <3

;R1999 6 - Self-Aware AU (2)

Compilation of headcanons about how a self-aware 6 would react to a Player who gushes over him. Related to this Self-Aware AU post.

ty for your ask, nonnie! sorry if this isnt what you were hoping for, I cant exactly see a character like 6 enjoying this sort of treatment!

Right away, I think this sort of thing would make 6 extremely uncomfortable.

We know how he feels about receiving attention or being on the spotlight, how he prefers to stay by the sidelines and only put himself out there when others need mediation or whenever his people require him to play the role of leader--so to have a voice constantly praising and gushing over him would be really tiring. 6 is the type of person who enjoys--perhaps it's better to say that he needs--time alone, with nothing but his thoughts and some peace and quiet, after all.

Is this, somehow, his unchecked ego? Are these his own deepest thoughts manifesting as a voice coming from above, muddling the truth? No, that can't be. 6 knows that his self-esteem and opinion on himself is much more humble than this.

Once he finds out about the existence of the Player, he grows even more confused. Or rather, a bit more timid now that he knows you're watching over him, scrutinizing and observing each and every gesture, every little thing he says. He's your favorite character for reasons he cannot even fathom--not due to a sense of inferiority or inadequacy, but genuine confusion. Did he mess up somewhere? He's not supposed to receive this much attention beyond his contributions to the main story.

I think 6 would be indifferent to any comments about his appearance. His entire bloodline is praised for their unique complexion, this isn't new at all. Comments about how the Player prefers him over 37 or the people of Apeiron--HIS people, HIS community--wouldn't sit well with him, since they're people he cherishes and considers important, even if he keeps his distance from them.

Overall, treating him like this and putting him on a pedestal just further enforces those themes of isolation from the previous post, so to speak!

A much younger 6 would've definitely appreciated the support, to have someone in his corner, especially after losing his aunt to the Revelation. But I like to think that 6 as he is right now is mature enough to recognize the importance of everyone else's points of views. He, more than anyone, understands that he had his faults and that his actions should have consequences, and his humble and pacifist side would also lead him to defend the actions of others, such as 210, despite the previous tension between them. There's a reason his number represents harmony!

And because he represents harmony and perfection, I think he would just tolerate this for a long time. He's spent years in isolation, he's had people talk at him about things he cannot find himself to care about--this is no trouble at all. 6 would simply sit there, or go on about his day as you ramble about him. But I can see him wishing to be turned into a painting in the main screen as often as possible, just for a moment of reprieve.

The more you praise him, the less he talks.

For 6 to truly listen what you have to say, you'll have to talk about something that isn't him. He is curious, especially when he catches you murmuring about other things, such as your next strategy to win this UTTU Special Week, or complaining about the lack of materials to level up others.

I think what 6 would like the most is catching glimpses of the life you lead when you're not focusing on the game, when you complain about responsibilities and how eager you are to unwind by playing the game, when your pet interrupts and you stop playing to shower it with attention and love... These small, fleeting flashes of who you are when no one else is around. Aside from this, he would also love to hear your opinion on the events of the game, without this obvious favoritism for him--what do you think of the allegory of the cave? Do you ever wonder about your soul number?

These are the things that would get 6 to slowly warm up to the idea of the Player watching over him, that would get him to speak back to you one day, on impulse or on purpose. And only once 6 sees you as more than a distant voice, when you finally bond with him in a more meaningful way, perhaps your praise will actually mean something to him. Perhaps he will thank you directly with a small smile, perhaps he will ask you to explain why you feel so strongly about him, genuinely curious about your point of view.

But in the mean time, silence is a virtue.

[oodlyenough]

apollo justice: ace attorney thoughts

over the weekend I finished playing AA4 so I wanted to try to put my thoughts in order. much to think about etc

spoilers for the whole game obv, but i haven't played AA5 or AA6 yet so any mention of those are speculation lol

I had heard some pretty mixed reactions to AA4 and I had a lot of reservations going in. It's also probably the AA game I've played that I've been the most spoiled for, which is a shame but probably an unavoidable consequence of waiting for the port while engaging with the fandom. I don't usually like being spoiled but I think knowing the broad strokes of what to expect actually helped here. I can imagine an AU where I blitzed through the first trilogy and onto 4 with no idea of what was coming and being... very upset and disappointed by the direction it took. Having several months to brace for things like Phoenix's disbarment, the 7 year gap, Trucy, etc definitely softened those blows and made me more amenable to them than I would've been otherwise.

Cases

For the most part I thought the puzzle solving was good and the pacing was solid. The puzzles were mostly challenging enough to be satisfying to solve but not so challenging as to be infuriating, and I don't think I needed a walkthrough at all. 4-1 is one of the best tutorial cases in the franchise so far (though I'd give the edge to 3-1) and 4-4 was a really cool finale. The middle two cases tbh I also found fairly charming, and there's usually a least one case in the middle that seems to drag forever, so that was a pleasant surprise. I played Investigations 1 right before this, and I thought both the puzzles and pacing in that game were frankly horrible, so AA4 won a lot of points just with that.

I did think Turnabout Corner and Serenade would be more relevant in the grand scheme of things. The half-spoilers I knew had me expecting a much bigger web of conspriacy than we ended up with -- I expected it to be more than coincidence that Phoenix got hit by a car, more than coincidence that the Borginian egg coccoons are related to poison etc ... like... I fully assumed this was going to tie into the atroquinine plot. But I guess not ... ? Lol

Characters

The new main cast are all very likable, despite my initial reluctance to have a new main cast to begin with. Klavier was an interesting change of pace as prosecutor, in that he wasn't particularly antagonistic outside of the court, nor was he particularly preoccupied with winning, but he was still fun and challenging enough to face off against. Trucy was fun and delightfully bonkers as all assistants should be. Apollo's longsuffering exasperation was hilarious. Ema is the BEST I loved having her as the detective I wish she was there all the time.

I loved Beanix, for the most part. I can see why he rubs some people the wrong way, and tbh I'm glad his last canon outing isn't ... this. But I didn't find him wildly out of character, or at least, when he was feeling "out of character" vs the trilogy it made sense given the intervening events. I also thought it was fun to see him from the outside and see what a galaxybrain 5d chess master he is. I do wish we'd gotten to see more genuine moments of him with Trucy.

Kristoph was fun as a villain, though I have to say fandom led me to believe he was much more of a mastermind puppeteer than he seemed to be in reality. I was expecting a whole decade worth of conspiracies! Instead he fucked up once and struggled to fix it for seven years, lol. I also found the Kristoph/Phoenix relationship a) very fascinating, b) not really what I'd been led to believe by fandom (shocker). I like the canon more though -- I like that instead of being a retread of the Dollie betrayal-from-someone-you-love it was two guys who hate each other being forced to play nice as part of their own schemes.

Criticism

I think it's fairly obvious AA4 was meant to be a soft reboot of the series, to pivot away from the trilogy cast and set up our new heroes in Apollo, Trucy, and I guess Klavier. I think this is probably the entire explanation behind Maya and Edgeworth (and others but lbr those are the big two)'s conspicuous absence... but that doesn't make their absence any less conspicuous. I can squint and forgive neither of them being there when Phoenix is accused of murder, even though I find that insane. I can squint around Maya maybe being off in Kurain during the Enigmar trial, even though I think they could've used a line of dialogue to explain it. But then we started playing past-Phoenix for huge portions of investigation and that started to fall apart for me. Sure, maybe he's pushing his friends away because he's depressed, or maybe he wants to keep Maya out of things because he thinks it's dangerous, or whatever -- you could at least throw in a line or two saying as much. Not mentioning them at all and setting AA4 so closely after AA3, where Phoenix fell through a bridge to save Maya and Edgeworth chartered a private jet, just feels ridiculous.

I also think, at the end of the day, the story here was focused on and pivoting around Phoenix. The core question of the game is "what the hell happened to/is up with Phoenix Wright?" I love Phoenix, so that alone isn't a negative -- except that I think it meant Apollo, Klavier and even Trucy felt underwritten. Trucy and Klavier have such personal stakes in the unfolding events with the Gramaryes and Kristoph, but we only spend a little time and hints on how that might influence Trucy, who mostly falls into the AA weird girl pattern of brushing off major trauma instantly. (Maya got this a lot too in the original trilogy.)

Klavier ... I like Klavier, but they did not do much with him. How did he feel about Kristoph going to jail? He doesn't seem to hold it against Apollo, which is uh, noble, but perhaps not believable. He says he values honesty and truth but do we know why?

Apollo, likable as he was, felt like a passenger in his "own" game, rather than a major character. He doesn't even solve much of the stuff happening in the big overarching mystery -- he is Phoenix's avatar in court, presenting evidence and clues Phoenix left for him. Unlike Trucy and Klavier, who I am pretty sure take a back seat from now on, I guess Apollo still has two more games to try and flesh himself out ... lol but I also know fan reception of those two is not great, so my expectations there are minimal.

Overall

A really solid game that I enjoyed playing, though I can see why it's controversial and not some people's favourite, if they really loved the trilogy. I think it's debatable whether this was the best/only way to continue the series after AA3. And I am excited to read and write a billion 7 year gap fics now.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

I actually thought that Adrien and Gabriel's relationship seemed like it might have been possible to salvage in the early seasons. What do you think?

@tallwriter Starting a new post since this one was getting super long as this is a different topic.

The problem with Gabriel Agreste's character is that they very clearly wanted to write a sympathetic villain - you can tell that from how the show handles his death - but sympathetic villains don't work if you make them cartoonishly evil. You have to handle the situation with nuance and delicacy, especially when one of the main heroes is the villain's son.

Gorizilla is not a perfect episode by any means, but it does showcase how Gabriel should have been written if they wanted him to come across as complex and sympathetic. In that episode, Gabe thinks that Adrien is Chat Noir and, because there's no way to magically force Adrien to reveal himself or confess his secrets, Gabriel has to come up with a situation where Adrien would be forced to transform of his own free will (since that can't be overwritten with a ring or something crazy like that). Which is how we get Adrien hurtling to his death while his father looks on:

Adrien: Always! (jumps out of Gorizilla's hand, and over the side of the building) Yeah-ha! Hawk Moth:(from his lair) No! ... Hawk Moth:(from his lair) If indeed you are Cat Noir, then transform, son. Please. (Adrien continues to fall downward, resolutely remaining as he is) Come on, son! (Ladybug looks down at Adrien, then raises her head, eyes closed.) Ladybug: Cat Noir, help!! Hawk Moth:(from his lair, to Gorizilla) Drop Ladybug!

This is good writing. Yes, Gabe's plan was kind of dumb (you live with Adrien, dude, just bug his room), but if we accept that this was the only way to go about a forced reveal - and that does seem to be the writer's logic - then we see a situation where Gabriel put his son above winning. A situation where he's still very much the villain, but he's not a dastardly, cold-hearted one. He does love his son.

There are actually several of these moments in the first three seasons. Some involve Adrien and many more involve Nathalie. It's why season five's claim that Gabe put beating Ladybug above everything else rings hollow. He never actually did that outside of Evolution (S5E1). He's almost always been loved-ones first when it really counts, a thing that Ladybug uses against him in the final when she tries to crush Emilie. The whole "Ladybug obsession" thing truly feels like something they just made up for that one episode to justify Nathalie "turning sides" aka doing nothing useful beyond maintaining the status quo (hey, they needed someone to keep the senti plot from having consequences and it wasn't like she was doing anything useful anyway!)

The problem is that this "loved ones first" mentality is only used for big dramatic moments, often as a way to keep Gabriel from winning. It's not Gabriel's main characterization even though it needed to be if you want season five's ending to feel even remotely earned. Going into that ending, we should have all thought that Gabe was a messed up dude who truly did love his son. And, if Gorizilla, Style Queen, and Ladybug had all been examples of his standard characterization, then we would have thought that.

But that's not who the writers told us Gabe was.

Instead, his standard characterization paints him as petty, controlling, and manipulative. Which is wild because there was no reason to do that! Gabe could - and should - have been played as stern and removed, but generally loving when he's outside of the mask. In other words, Gabriel Agreste could be well liked while Hawk Moth was hated.

The crazy thing is that this is such a simple change to make. You either removed the episodes where Gabe's awful parenting is the source of the conflict (ex: Bubbler) or you just make a few minor changes to show that he's conflicted about his actions.

For example, take Chat Blanc, the episode that ruined so many elements of this show! In that episode, Gabe is a total bastard. He happily sacrifices his son's happiness to make an akuma in the form of Marinette and then, when Adrien's secret is revealed, does Gabe have any sort of conflict about traumatizing his son? The kind of conflict we'd expect after episodes like Gorizilla? Nope! He straight up delights in showing Adrien Emilie's... corpse? Comatose form? Whatever! Gabe then akumatizes Adrien with a smile on his face.

That gets the writers a solid F for consistent characterization. It's why I highlighted "almost" in red when I mentioned Gabe's motivation. Because in Ephemeral and Chat Blanc, the writing ignores the sympathetic stuff that characterizes the dramatic moments and goes straight for the worst-father-of-the-year, love-to-hate-him, please-let-him-die-now characterization that we get in most episodes.

If you were writing Chat Blanc's Gabriel to fit his intended complex, sympathetic mold, then you would probably drop the breakup plot or you'd have spent all season setting Marinette up as the perfect akuma target, changing the breakup into something that Gabriel felt that he HAD to do instead of opportunistic evilness. You'd also have Gabe drop a line like, "I'm sorry, Adrien. You'll thank me later" before the Chat Blanc akumatization. Or at least don't have him grinning! Do something, ANYTHING to show that Gabe sees using his son like this as a necessary evil and not a fun time! You know, like how he was begging Adrien to transform during Gorizilla? Almost like Gabe had stopped caring about winning and started just wanting his son to live.

Would these changes make Gabe less of a fun cartoon villain? Yes, but that's the point. Cartoon villains are cartoony. They're over the top. They have no nuance. Sympathetic villains don't work with those characteristics.

The normal way to get around this in a cartoon setting is to have secondary antagonists who can be played as cartoonishly evil. And, confusingly, Miraculous has those characters. Chloe, Sabrina, and Lila have been here since season one (Kim could also have stayed a bully and been added to that list, but he's not a teenage girl, so I get why they didn't do that /s.) Felix has been around since seasons three. Nathalie has been an active villain since season two. Any or all of these characters could be the cartoonish, nuance-less villain while Gabriel stays sympathetic.

Instead, they play Gabe however they want to play him in any given episode, making it so that he's impossible to understand from an audience perspective. I personally like the sympathetic take and think that those are the show's best episodes because I like complex villains. It's even how I write Gabe in my stuff because I go for less cartoony takes on canon.

I don't think a redemption was needed, but a sympathetic villain doesn't require one. All that term means is that you can understand the villain and be sympathetic to their plight. Redemption is optional. In fact, the goal is often not redemption, but an understand that, "there but for the grace of the gods go I." I mean, we've all lost loved ones. Wouldn't the power to bring a loved one back tempt you, too?

If they wanted to go for evil, cartoony Gabe, then they needed to drop all of the complexity and go for a Disney villain type character who gets a Disney villain death a la Scar or Mother Gothel. Don't give Gabe the wish. Let him fall to his own hubris by falling into the water of his secret layer and lading as a puddle of ash while a sad Ladybug looks on, having just failed to save him.

If you want to see an excellent look at how cartoon Gabe could have worked, then I highly recommend @zoe-oneesama's Scarlet Lady comic, which is just nearing its end after a multi-year run. I think it's fair to say that Zoe and I largely agree on canon's flaws, she just fixes them by leaning into the cartoon side of things, creating a hilarious story with lots of heart. Canon could have absolutely gone that way too and worked out wonderfully! The issue is not a lack of nuance, it's that they tried to add nuance without ever fully committing to it, making a story that is the worst of both worlds. While a more serious nuanced reboot would be my ideal dream, a reboot that scraps all of Gabe's nuance and just makes him go full evil would be just as satisfying and Zoe proves that.

[anakinsafterlife]

Thoughts on Dune Part 2

All right, friends. Dune Part 2. I absolutely picked the wrong time to start wanting to return to Tumblr, since I'm currently in the thick of Ramadan, but c'est la vie. I'm a bit worried that if I don't review now that I might forget my specific impressions of the movie, though I have to say that if this weren't Ramadan that I absolutely would be going back to see it again in the cinema, which says a lot considering that it's been at least ten years since I've actually wanted to go back and repeat a film instead of just waiting for it to come out on streaming/DVD.

So the movie is good. It is in fact very, very good. It's the Empire Strikes Back of the Dune duology (possibly trilogy), and (much like Empire) in terms of cinematography, music, scripting and acting it's nearly flawless. There are, however, issues, things that might not occur to a majority-Western audience but which are immediately clear to anyone who either comes from an Arab or Muslim background.

What follows here is a deep dive into some of the historical and cultural sources of Dune and some of the ways in which the movie producers, and in some cases fans, have failed to acknowledge those sources.

First of all, it's obvious that the Fremen are meant to be based on the Arabs, but of the the entire main cast there is only ONE actor with an Arab background, and that is Souhaila Yacoub, the half-Tunisian actress who plays Shishakli, the female Fremen warrior who is executed by the Harkonnens. Now, I have to say that this woman was fantastic. Her attitude is completely on point for an Arab, especially a North African Arab: forceful, loud, a bit brash and mocking even under fire. Nicely done. Points to the producers there, but I have to take that point away again because she is literally the only Space Arab who is actually Arab. Javier Bardem, the Spanish actor who plays Stilgard, does have some interesting moments and one of the reasons why I feel that the screenwriters were advised on Arabic traditions/culture. The incident during which he warns Paul about the Jinn in the desert like it's a joke but then immediately turns extremely serious when Paul starts smiling is so in character for an Arab and honestly just a brilliant bit of scripting, but much of the time he also acted more or less like what people *think* a fanatical religious Arab acts like--loud, frantic and unstable.

Not only this, but the "Muslim" behaviour/traditions in the film are at best...vague. People are praying, but in any direction at all. I do realize that this would be a complicated issue on another planet, where the Ka'aba couldn't be pointed to, but there are Islamic rulings for EVERYTHING. Check out the one about praying in space:

Even if they had as a society simply picked a random direction for prayer, they should all be praying at the same time and in the same direction (they seem to do this in larger crowds, but not in the smaller group where we first see people praying). They also definitely shouldn't be talking during prayer or trying to make other people talk to them during prayer (as Chani does), since talking breaks your prayer and you have to start over all over again (during obligatory prayers).

Language, too, is an issue, and a big one, because while I do understand that a conlang was developed for use in this movie, the linguists consulted did know that the language was meant to be heavily influenced by Arabic. Consequently, they've included a lot of fragmentary Arabic in their work. Unfortunately this Arabic is poorly pronounced at best, to the point where I was looking words up and laughing at what they're meant to be based on. For example, "Shai Hulud," the word for the Worms, is based on the Arabicشيء خلود, which means "immortal thing," and should be pronounced with "shai" rhyming with "say" followed by a glottal stop, and the 'h' in "Hulood" is actually a guttural sound like the infamous "ch" in Bach, followed by a long U. Another example is Mua'dib مهذب , a real word in Arabic that means "teacher," but is is actually pronounced with a "th" sound instead of a d and emphasis on the second syllable, not on the last as in French. (Note: I made an error here. There is a word مؤدب , pronounced mostly the same in the movie, but with a glottal stop after the 'u' sound and a short 'i' after the d sound rather than a long vowel, that is usually used to mean polite, urbane, gentlemanly, etc. but which can also mean teacher, although I have never heard it used in this context) "Usul", أصول, Paul's other Fremen name, was likely not, as I had previously guessed, based on the word "Rasool," meaning Prophet, but on أصول الفقه the Principles of islamic Jurisprudence, which also ties directly into a religious/prophetic them. Again, this is pronounced on the long vowel, so with a short first U and a long second U.

I've included the Arabic spellings in here, by the way, so that you can drop them into Google translator and hear how they actually sound.

Now, I do realize that the story itself is set 8000 years in the future and that spoken Arabic as a language would have changed considerably in that time, if it existed still at all, but Arabic is a liturgical language as well as a vehicle for conversation, and Muslims all across the world today use it as a tool for worship. Muslims who have no cultural connection with Arabic often still learn it in order to connect more deeply with religious traditions and simply to perform prayers and other religious duties. Religious scholars consider it to be a necessary duty of the Muslim to learn at least some Arabic:

And keep in mind that the Arabic spoken today across the MENA region is very different (and different in different places) to the Arabic spoken 1400 years ago by the Prophet Mohamed (peace be upon him). Given Islamic traditions, the chances of the Fremen using liturgical/classical Arabic for their worship would be quite high, even if their spoken language had evolved past the point of being recognizably Arabic.

Keep in mind, also, that Dune as a whole is an allegory for colonialism, economic exploitation of poorer nations (or making rival nations poor through the same), as well as dehumanization of the views and needs of native peoples in order to make that exploitation palatable to the occupying forces (I thought that this was done quite smartly in Jessica's part of the story; although she is sympathetic to the Fremen, she feels that manipulating their religious traditions is the best way to protect her son, and in doing so she allows herself to dehumanize the people who come to rely on her).

It is, therefore, incumbent upon us not to distance ourselves too much from the intended message by claiming that Dune is fiction and need not too accurately reflect the culture and religion of the people that the Fremen are so clearly based on. The fact that the producers have done little to hire Arab actors or induced any real effort to accurately pronounce the Arabic words or accurately portrayal Islamic practices seems to indicate that they are concerned about identifying too closely with the economic and cultural struggle between East and West, properly because they fear the potential economic backlash, and this despite the fact that Frank Herbert clearly wrote his book to illustrate the fallout of that struggle.

Here is a wonderful article written by a culturally Arab woman:

There are numerous other articles addressing the same issues, but I like this one because it's written by a Muslim woman, who also addresses the "hijab cosplaying" in the movie. I didn't get into that much, but I definitely recognize that it's a problem when Muslim women worry about potential violence while wearing hijab in the streets of Western nations, but the same article of clothing is fetishized in movies and fashion.

I've also seen some comment about the Mahdi mention in particular. This is a saviour-figure in Islam who will come near the end of the world. There is no emphasis on this figure in Sunni Islam, but Shias seem to have a significant body of literature concerning this figure and, from what I understand, believe that he may perhaps have already come, and so there has been some poor reception in that community to applying the label of Mahdi to Paul. Criticisms ranging from insensitivity to outright blasphemy have been levelled regarding this usage. Now, there was some tip-toeing around the prophetic theme in Dune, and rightly so, I believe, since the Prophet Mohamed is the "seal of the prophets" in Islam, meaning the last and final. The fact that Paul was essentially set up as a false prophet by the Bene Gesserit does avoid some of the potential fallout from this, and also makes sense of Chani's rejection at the end of the film, since she felt strongly about Paul acting as a false Prophet.

Again, I am aware that there is internal cosmology within the series itself, and that some fans object to the religion of the Fremen being referred to as Islam, but when the inspiration for the entire ethnicity, religion, and the natural resources at stake are as clear as they are in this series, it's also futile to expect that people will not draw those associations, nor that people belonging to the religion or ethnic group in question may not acknowledge the beauty of the movie, the gorgeous cinematography, rousing music, and tightly plotted story, but still take exception to what is clearly Orientalism.

And it is frankly such a shame that we have to place this movie under that header, because the story of Dune is so sympathetic to the Middle East and its peoples, and as I said in the beginning I actually loved the film and found it very beautiful. It was also exciting to see Islamic themes used creatively in mainstream media, but while Frank Herbert clearly wrote the story as an exposition on the exploitation of natural resources, particularly oil, in the MENA region, the truth is that the racism and exploitation that he was protesting are very much alive today and contribute to the oppression of millions. It's particularly disappointing to see the message of the movie sail over the heads of people watching it when Arab Muslims in Palestine are being dehumanized and obliterated at this very moment, and while Libya was one of the latest Arab nations to be targeted for its oil resources, only a decade ago, with European oil companies moving in directly after the downfall of Ghadafi (which makes the timing extremely suspicious, one might say):

And even after the US finished their occupation of Iraq, Western oil companies remained en mass to continued drilling:

Egypt to this day remains economically destabilized while Western nations exploit its oil stocks, to no benefit at all of its peoples:

I'm sure I could cite dozens of other cases, but it's clear that there is a one-on-one parallel between spice melange and oil, making any protests of apoliticism in an inherently political story utterly vain.

I could go on, but I needn't. In short, this beautiful movie could have done so much good even beyond its obvious artistic merits, but instead it is still towing the political line. Much as was the case for Jessica and Paul, sometimes you can be a Harkonnen and not know it.

[kannymaei]

Eloping With The General - Prologue (Jing Yuan x Reader)

MASTERLIST

Author's Note: I haven't finished most of the main quests in HSR so everything will or might not be true to the story. Some characters may be OOC and this is not canon to anything <3 (Also new fic woohoo?)

Synopsis: The stars had crossed the paths of the future general of Xianzhou Luofu and a girl that originated from another universe through a meteor crash. While Xianzhou Luofu suffers the consequences of the curse of immortality, Jing Yuan has kept you imprison in his room for a long time before fate separates you for a long time.

Word Count: 1.2k

Next Chapter -> Chapter 1

Roughly 2000 years ago...

A young Jing Yuan was having trouble sleeping but he couldn't sneak out outside due to the fact that he'd be punished by Jing Liu for staying up late at night so he decided to star gaze on his balcony instead and no one could see him. 

A very bright shooting star caught his eyes. He was fixated on the star that he began to doubt it was a star but rather a meteor. 

The moment the meteor landed it caused quite an earthquake that awoke the people in Xianzhou Luofu but people assumed that it was just a normal shaking in their land. No one could have thought that it was a meteor.

Except that Jing Yuan knew that it was a meteor, so he jumped from his balcony and ran towards the direction of that meteor due to his curiosity getting the best of him. 

---

After a few minutes, Jing Yuan saw a very odd shaped meteor. It has an oblong shape and the stone was smooth, it doesn't even look like stone, it's like porcelain with a jade in the middle. 

He thought of how something like that would fall here? He decided to check it out and touched the jade. 

Something happened, the so-called meteor had opened and revealed something... Rather someone.

Now Playing: Lia - One 

When I saw you for the first time, I knew you were the one.

Smoke came out from the meteor and it opened slowly, you slowly opened your eyes to see a boy of your age who's on his back crawling away slowly from you. 

You didn't say a word to me, but love was in the air.

What Jing Yuan saw was a girl with foreign clothing, she wasn't wearing any kind of slippers to cover her feet. 

"Hello!" Jing Yuan said but he was frozen because your beauty was nowhere near the beauty of the world he was living in. 

You were just staring at him, barely understanding whatever comes from this boy's mouth but based on his gestures, it seemed like he was trying to introduce himself to you. 

"Ah let me cover your feet so it won't get dirty" Jing Yuan tore off his clothing and wrapped it around your feet and ankles. 

When you held my hand, and pulled me into your world. 

You felt his touch on your hand, and began showing you around the meteor area.

From then on my life has changed for good, now I'll never feel lonely again because you are in my life. 

Jing Yuan wasn't a good liar. A few years have passed by and he has kept you inside his room for quite a long time. He realized that he can't have you running around the city because you don't belong there in the first place and he was scared that you might get executed. 

Nevertheless, the two of you never shared a verbal conversation and he has assumed that you might be mute but in reality you aren't. You just listened to him as he taught you their language but you never attempted starting a conversation with him. 

Love, how can I explain to you the way I feel inside when I think of you. 

Jing Yuan can’t help but to worry about you because he left you inside his room for training. He wondered what he would do if they ever found out that he was keeping a lady of unknown species that may be possibly a threat to everyone. 

You gazed upon the windows of his room to see people running around, selling buns and other sweets. It was very different from the world that you originally came from, it was rather peaceful and not chaotic. You can’t help but think about him and what kind of training he does.

I thank you for everything that you showed me, don't you ever forget that I love you. 

Jing Yuan always brings something home to show you such as a mechanical bird, a special breed of flowers, and sometimes he brings home snacks to eat with you. Jing Liu and the others have been suspicious why he was buying food that is more than for himself and he can’t bring himself to tell that it was for you.

He was still young to realize that he was already attached to you.

Love, I know that someday, real soon. You'll be right next to me. 

Jing Yuan had a dream that someday, the citizens would accept your presence and you would no longer be considered a threat.

Holding me so tight so I will always be yours. 

Jing Yuan brought you to a secret and special place where you could admire the entire beauty of the city. Only people with such high status like him are permitted

Although we can't be together now, remember I am here for you when I know you're there for me. 

"H-hey… this might sound weird but-" Young Jing Yuan blushes as he was about to confess his feelings for you until multiple mara-stuck cloud knights began to surround two of you.

He immediately brought his sword out and told you to stand on his back as he'd attempt to protect you and make you run away to escape.

You knew that you can't leave him, if it's someone who needs to be protected, it has to be him and not you. 

Whenever I long to be with you, I just close my eyes and pretend you're here. 

You could tell that Jing Yuan was really scared facing these many enemies as he was still very young and was not used to fights like this.

"I'll p-protect you okay! D-don't worry-" Jing Yuan breathed heavily, cold sweat began running down his cheeks.

He looked back and saw that you were not on his side.

The Mara-stuck soldiers began to charge all at once to him and Jing Yuan was terrified, fear clouded his mind as he didn't know what's the next step he should do.

I see you, I touch you, I feel you, like real. 

A bright light came on, shooting one of the Mara-stuck soldiers that was about to stab and curse Jing Yuan, throwing it off-field. 

He looked at the direction where the light came from.

Nothing can ever change what I feel inside. 

"The eyes were a threat to the void" For the first time in so many years, Jing Yuan has heard your loving and soft voice. 

You aligned your hand against the soldiers as blinding light began to surround the entire area, the soldiers were stunned as light envelopes them completely and it was the last thing that Jing Yuan saw.

How long must I be far away from you? 

10 hours later. 

Jing Yuan woke up to see several soldiers around him were cured from the curse of Mara. 

He was very happy now that he knew there was a cure for mara.

He was glad that he wasn't cursed. 

But one thing bothered him. 

You were nowhere to be found.

I don't know dear but, I know we are one. 

Centuries have passed and Jing Yuan is finally the general of the city. 

He kept on reminiscing the days he had as a child, the days he had with you. 

He was very afraid of the day he'd forget what you look like because he had already forgotten what your voice sounds like. 

He is very afraid that these precious memories of him with you are starting to blur. 

Until one fateful day, the brightest star lands on Xianzhou Luofu once again. 

[autumnmobile12]

This was the only time in the show where one of the main trio interacted with one of the forge master duo.

And, I gotta admit, this was one of the things that disappointed me in the show.  As much as I love this series, I do wish these two storylines had converged in the end.

Like I really thought there would come a point when the vampire sisters invaded Wallachia and Sypha and Trevor would encounter Hector and realize he was an unwilling participant.  Similar to the scene we got with Isaac, Hector would say he couldn’t help them because of the blood ring restraining him.  And with all the fighting they’d been through and Trevor just being straight up done with everyone and their mother, I think he would have just handed Hector a knife and said, “You have two options.  You’re either our ally or our enemy.  Cut that ring off and help us or I’ll kill you.  What’ll it be?”  Harsh perhaps, but a big part of Trevor’s character is ‘do what’s necessary’ no matter the personal cost, so I don’t imagine he would have had much patience for Hector.  And that’s a difference between Trevor and Hector’s characters that I really need to go into in a separate character analysis.

This was my outlook when Season 3 ended though.  We did leave off with the return of Trevor’s dark view of the world in spite of the positive influence Sypha brought, and Hector realizing the consequences of trusting Lenore.  The series played Season 4 off pretty well in that Hector did have initiative was actively conspiring behind the scenes in order to give Isaac the opening he needed to take out Carmilla.  So I’m glad they didn’t write Hector off as ‘the helpless one.’

On another couple of notes, I kinda thought/hoped Sypha’s grandfather would make a reappearance in the final season and he would be the one to finish what the Ship Captain started in guiding Isaac along his journey of letting go of his anger and just living well, but that’s just me.

Back in Season 2, Isaac refers to Alucard as a spoiled child, and I really want to know what that was all about.  In the battle against the Generals and the Styrian soldiers, Isaac and Alucard seem to recognize each other, but did they have any interaction with each other before Lisa died?  Maybe I’m wrong and Isaac just thought, ‘There’s only one person that could be.’  I’ve talked about my theory that Alucard was a sheltered child and hadn’t seen much hardship in his life before his mother was killed, so I can see him and Isaac resenting each other out of emotional immaturity.  It would have been interesting to see that development in their characters.

But I get it.  The show only had a limited number of episodes and didn’t have time for all the tiny nuanced story arcs, and that’s fine.  An important element of writing is being aware of which parts are the essential and which are ones you need to cut.  If it were a longer running series like Avatar: The Last Airbender, then I would expect some more attention and care put into the subplots and side characters.  It’s a little touch and go with Striga and Morana’s relationship, Zamfir’s backstory wasn’t as developed as it could have been, and there are other elements that felt rushed.

Even so, I truly think the end result was fantastic.

[hsslilly-blog]

Thinking about HuntClaire. I like it when Hunt tells Claire he's "all in" (quest 5; First Date). I think it's an important moment to their relationship, and it's something that defines it. It's interesting especially when you take Claire's character in consideration. Here is my essay under the cut. It is very long, sorry!

Before anything: in my timeline for Hollywood U, quest 5/“First Date” takes place in Jan/15, so around 6 months have passed since “On the Hunt”.

As I've written before, Claire spent her entire life with a distorted view of love. This led her into less than ideal situations (this one included). She has deep rooted self-esteem issues she's not aware of, she just knows she thinks she's not worth... "it" ("it" = always being a self-destructive gesture, risking "something"; she destroys herself to prove herself, so the other must too). This has much to do with how she first established "love" with her parents. Attention is love! Claire believes the people she's in relationships with will, inevitably, lose interest in her; and she believes this, because she truly thinks there's something extremely off-putting about herself. And she's much better as an idealised concept than a person. People don't like her naturally, so she must make them love her.

And, see, Claire has a terrible death drive: she's stuck in a cycle that will cause her pain; she's always pursued relationships with men that will not give her what she wants, which in turn will reaffirm her beliefs about herself, which will make her look for assurance from other people. It is through these relationships that Claire tries to find this feeling of worthiness: her main deal is trying to shift the power imbalance between her and her partners (because there always is one), and most of the time it comes through the simple act of these men crossing boundaries to be with her. Giving her attention when they should not be giving her any.

So, Claire saw her therapist as something to be conquered. Would her parents' divorce lawyer muddle the waters to be with her? Would this guy mess up his campaign plans just so he can go on a few dates with her? Yes, probably. But they're not committed to her: they also see her as something to be conquered, a fling. There is not much thought put into Claire, or into the relationship as a whole. No consideration for consequences. Claire is something. For Claire, this is not empowering, this is self-destructive behaviour. And when time comes, these men leave her and blame her for their ruin.

This is all part of her characterisation as a perceived femme fatale. "Perceived" because Claire does not do this out of malice. This is not conscious behaviour; at least it's not something Claire realises she's doing when she's doing it. I will return to this later.

Okay, well. Hunt checks all the boxes, right. He's her professor and by God, he does not want to cross any boundaries. This guy literally runs away from Claire in more than one occasion. Unfortunately for him, this is a dream come true to her. This does not play like in canon; like I said, Claire doesn't do this out of malice. She just sees a man who does not esteem her, and this is outrageous to her, and she needs to prove him wrong; and she needs to show him that, actually, she's totally nice and pleasant and, like, interesting! Claire is not even pursuing him romantically, at first. She doesn't even like him as a person that much. She just feels she has to prove herself to him, somehow. She must make him love her. It simply gets entangled in the midst of it all, as it often does with Claire.

I've talked before (in tags) why I think they work together. Hunt does not give Claire attention. At least, not in the way she wants to (positive attention.) There is something about Claire that is very offensive to Hunt: she is too much like him! This relationship is not about Claire wearing down a guy until he dates her (which, honestly, that's what it feels like in canon). This is about two deeply flawed people who see conflict as a form of connection. They cannot interact sincerely with each other because they are both too deep in their own prejudices. Claire has a distorted perception of herself. People dislike her not for innate, mysterious reasons, but because she is pushy and brashy. Hunt needs to get over himself. He is not being frank, he is just being rude and unpleasant most of the time. And these are two people who love pointing fingers at others, and then they decide to point it at each other.

They're deeply attracted to each other because one constantly challenges the other. And as much as they do not like to admit this (the great flaw of pride), there is something to be admired in a person that manages to humble you. These are characters that need to be wrong every once in a while. And they found that in each other. Claire has the unconscious need to make Hunt like her, but she's unaware of what makes her unlikeable. And he will make her aware of it. And Hunt thinks of himself as the judge of everything that is good in the world. Claire tells him he's not that important, actually.

There is mutual investment in this relationship. And I think that's what levels the ground between them. Not whatever Claire was doing before.

Once they get together, the issue with Claire and worthiness does not go away (and it won't for a long while); but this is a different relationship than any other she has had, because Hunt is a different person from all the men she's dated before. He is not a person who does things haphazardly, unplanned, not thought through. Most importantly: once he chooses something, he commits to it. So, when he decides to date Claire he's not doing it in precipitation. He has given thought to it, he has given thought to the consequences and he has given thought to Claire. Thence, when he tells her he's "all in", he means it and he is willing to risk it all for her (which does happen; he loses his job) because he thinks she, as a person, adds more to him.

This is probably when Claire realises that she's falling for him (and truly!). I think hearing that from him means a lot to her. It touches a wound in her. Oh, so there are people who are willing to do... things for her. And, of course, not implying this is healthy. This is not fixing anything, because that is not the point. Claire will not mature in this aspect through a relationship... and this all kinda reaffirms her worldview. As for Hunt: he literally throws his career away for her, so maybe he should visit an analyst as well. The point is that this is an important moment to Claire and Hunt's relationship; and this is why this, out of all the relationships Claire has had, lasts. There is a commitment from him in a way that enables her complex, but there's also being seen as a person in a way that she'd never experienced before.

I also like how this subverts Claire's archetype of a perceived femme fatale, slightly. Hunt does lose his job so, in a way, she would have "lead him to ruin". The difference here is that Hunt is fully aware of the consequences, he has given thought to the situation, and he still chose her. She has not "deceived him" (and I'd say she never deceived any man; they knew what they were getting into). The point here is that Hunt does not shift the blame to Claire at any moment: if he lost his job, then that's his doing. Claire is only a person! She has no way of coercing him into anything. He could've said no. And he chose not to.

I need to postface this with: Claire is a complexed person. And as all people with complexes, not everything fits neatly. People are not A to B to C! And neither is she, and there will be contradictions most often than not. I do think most aspects of her personality makes sense in relation to one another, but it's hard to break down a person in parts when they're a totality. This is just a general overview! Lastly, Hunt and Claire will always have a weird dynamic going on between them; they work well, but it's very easy for them to not work well. And maybe that’s what keeps them together.

[iamfuckingsorry]

Sorry guys, another DE rant incoming. This one's not even on any specific topic, just some feelings about the game that I need to get out.

So, the game absolutely fucking killed me. I intentionally didn't play the entire thing at once to give myself time to process and it still fucking killed me. And by killed I mean I had to take crying breaks at work hiding in the bathroom. Like literally unable to go through a day at work without coming this close to a breakdown. And there's other compounding factors for that, sure, but still.

And it's like... It's a chilling social commentary with too many layers for its own good. The main character is a walking bundle of current and past issues mixed with the consequences of extremely messed-up past actions. The main support character has the best of intentions but is heavily flawed himself. Everyone else in the story is fucked up, really every single fucking thing is fucked up, yet the game itself keeps giving you these little snippets of hope. All the side quests where you can make a difference to someone. Deep conversations. Kim smiling. Realizing the people you originally thought were massive assholes were just hurting. The goddamn stick insect.

You are a violent and irrepressible miracle.

Something beautiful is going to happen.

In the dark times, should the stars also go out?

Streets and sodium lights, the sky, the world. You're still alive.

You still have some years. You still have some hope.

The only way to load the dice is to keep on fighting.

Kim being so hopelessly in love with Revachol even though he's been treated like shit by the city's inhabitants.

Harry being so hopelessly in love with Revachol, too, even though he can't even remember her.

The world is shit, but there's still all these little things that make it worth living.

And I'd... really love for that to be my take away. I would really, really fucking love that. But somehow, I can't.

Because no matter how much good you do preventing an absolute bloodbath in Martinaise, changes are coming, and they aren't good changes. The wheels are already in motion and they cannot be stopped, no matter how vigilant Harry is, no matter how much Revachol loves him.

22 years after Harry wakes up, Revachol's getting nuked to pieces.

Some 5 years after that, the entire world as we know it is getting swallowed by the pale.

Kim Kitsuragi will not live to see 70.

(Honestly, this is the line that kills me the most. He deserves to grow old, to look at his life and be happy with what he's done with it, at peace and fully accepted by everyone including himself for the first time in his life. And instead he's getting killed in a pointless conflict that will usher in the end of the world, or if he won't get killed then, he's getting nuked to death. Kim Kitsuragi will not live to see 70.)

Anyway. I know that that's part of the point. Horrible things are inevitable but that doesn't mean life isn't worth living and good things aren't worth fighting for. You can still fight the inevitable darkness while you're here, you should still fight the inevitable darkness while you're here, you need to fight the inevitable darkness while you're still here because if you don't, then what are you living for? And if not you, then who? If you lose your last sliver of hope, then you lose everything. Yes, life is terrible and terrifying, but life is also so, so, so beautiful.

And even when life is shit, it's all just part of a cycle. Sometimes bad things need to happen in order for the good ones to be able to come back again. One day I'll return to your side. After death, life again. After the pale, the world again. The good connected to the bad, intertwined so tightly they cannot be separated in any meaningful way.

And I think I'm starting to get there, I really do. After the pale, the world again. Even in the darkest of times there is always hope of a brighter future. After the pale, the world again. After death, life again. Un jour je serai de retour près de toi. The only way to load the dice is to keep on fighting. The stars will never go out, not even in the darkest of times.

But instead I just... I close my eyes and I think of Revachol herself begging Harry to save her, and I think of her burning, and I think of Kim not living to see 70.

And I want to cry.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hey, may I ask what you thought of how they dealt with Rollo in the end? I heard that he doesn't really get punished and I'm confused about why that is since he posed such a threat to all of Twst Wndrlnd

I’ve actually received several similar asks about this matter, so I’d like to analyze the ending here. (This is coming out a few months after the event because I kept going back to add thoughts and revise large parts of this post.)

I’ll look at some of the common points brought up as to why some felt that the conclusion was not satisfying, then give my thoughts on them and discuss Rollo’s fate in detail.

***Spoilers ahead!!***

Mmm, I feel like I’ve seen similar complaints (about how the main conflict was resolved) floating around in the fandom. I’ve seen a number of fans express upset with this conclusion, most often citing that “Rollo got off too easy” and “his punishment should have been worse”. Some people have even stated they wanted Rollo arrested and/or extreme physical violence to be enacted on him (Malleus killing Rollo and/or the NRC boys beating him up badly).

Firstly, this is nothing new for how TWST typically deals with resolutions of massive conflicts and characters with deep trauma. Every single one of the OB boys also got let off relatively scot-free despite also putting others in grave danger. From a meta perspective, this makes sense. TWST has always been and always will be a game that asks us to empathize with villains, to show us that behind every evil, there is a chance to be good--and by offering them the chance to repent and to reflect, they can rehabilitate on their own terms.

I feel that a lot of this demand for “more” in Rollo’s case stems from a fundamental difference between him and the OB boys (who are also largely forgiven and let off with a slap on the wrist for their actions). This, of course, is that Rollo’s plans were far greater in scale and had immediate consequences on a larger population than any OB would. By all metrics, Rollo has done “worse”, and thus should warrant a “worse” punishment than being forced to play in a Magift tournament or being forced to perform onstage after taking substantial damage (ie as were the cases for Leona, Vil, etc.) in the eyes of some fans.

While I do agree that what Rollo did was deplorable and that he got off lightly compared to the gravity of his crimes, I don’t think that he deserves “more” of a punishment, and certainly not anything close to physical harm. Like... realistically, what would inflicting physical harm onto Rollo do for anyone? Catharsis? That’s but a temporary emotional release for the ones inflicting the pain, and it ultimately doesn’t do anything meaningful. That’s just an “easy” solution that doesn’t actually solve the core problem. If Rollo is kicked while he’s down, won’t that just make him double down on his ideals? And if he gets slain, that’s just an “easy” way out so the NRC students don’t actually have to deal with others of dubious morals existing in their world. Their group includes several people who were shown mercy at their worst moments (Riddle, Jamil, Azul, Idia), and to refuse Rollo the same would make them massive hypocrites.

Violence aside, there’s also significant disappointment that Rollo’s actions are being kept a secret, so that the public cannot hold him accountable for what he has done. The very minimum some fans wanted was for the City of Flowers locals and/or NBC students to become aware of Rollo’s true nature, and thus turn on him for it. This is very similar to Vil’s OB in episode 5, when he comes close to revealing his unsightly self to the public and risks tarnishing his public image. Again, I feel that Rollo isn’t extended the same courtesy because of the scale of his ambitions, but also because he doesn’t automatically express remorse for what he did (whereas Vil apologizes so many times over). What we need to keep in mind is that characters are different from one another, so what is seen as awful and world-ending is not the same for one character as it is to another. In my opinion, THIS is what makes the conclusion to Glorious Masquerade so fitting.

I want to point out here that in choosing to not expose Rollo or to beat up/kill him, it doesn’t mean the NRC boys entirely forgive him or that they aren’t holding him accountable for his actions. They call Rollo out several times throughout the climax and falling action, telling him how deplorable he is and how he’s endangering so many lives in the process of pursuing his “justice”. How they ultimately choose to deal with him is an extension of that, but it doesn’t involve needless violence.

Rollo’s punishment is a personalized hell in HIS eyes, even if we, the audience, don’t see it that way and call for “more” justice. Just because his punishment isn’t immediately tangible or isn’t recognized by a large population doesn’t make it any less of one, and this shouldn’t be underestimated. To “punish” does not necessarily mean its easy to see, it just means that it is substantially punishing to the one receiving it. That alone is enough, and it is something that is acknowledged by both the NRC boys and Rollo himself.

After Rollo is defeated, he knows that he will inevitably receive the consequences for what he has done. He tells the NRC boys to punish him, take him to the authorities, to basically do whatever they see fit to him, and he will accept it without resistance. Rollo expects ruthlessness, that he will not be granted any sort of forgiveness. Why is that? Because Rollo is ruthless with himself, and he expects the world and the other people in it to act no differently towards him. It’s not that Rollo has automatically realized the error of his ways, but that he is, as his mob students describe him, “hard on others and hard on himself”. Rollo has ultimately failed to accomplish his goal, and he believes he must be punished for this failure.

But, much to Rollo’s surprise, that isn’t what he gets. Malleus and co. lead him down the bell tower, and when they run into NBC’s vice president and student council aide, they show that they were worried for him. Rollo tries to explain to what happened to them. However, Malleus cuts him off and claims that they don’t know how the crimson flowers even started growing and overtaking the school and the city to begin with. Idia and Azul chime in, giving vague details like that Rollo was already up the bell tower before they were, and they allow the NBC mob students to make their own assumptions about what happened. Because the mob students revere Rollo so much, they come to the conclusion that he was a selfless hero and worked with the NRC students to save the day, then praise him for his heroism and emphasize just how proud they are of him. They even say Rollo is like the Just Judge of legend, someone that we know Rollo admires.

And the twisted thing about all of this is that the NRC boys just purposefully never bother correcting them. At this point, neither can Rollo. The mobs have piled on so much praise, have expressed so much concern for their president's safety, so how would they feel to have all of that hope and happiness come crashing down on them? What would happen if those feelings turned into betrayal and hurt? It is these types of questions that speaks to the true gravity of Rollo's "punishment".

He at first accuses the NRC boys of hiding the truth because they pity him, and he's insulted by the perceived pity. However, as Azul explains, it is not pity. Malleus and the others will allow Rollo to confess to his sins or pretend like nothing happened. In fact, it is the perfect punishment for someone like Rollo, someone who is so hard on themselves and cannot come to terms with the truth of his own insecurities. Rollo doesn't seem to realize it right away, so he instead grows cocky and says it's basically the same as him being absolved. On the contrary, as Malleus points out, while lying to himself will make it easier for him to deceive others, Rollo cannot lie to the Bell of Salvation--a precious magical artifact which Rollo has been tending to for some time now, the one thing that watches over everything in the City of Flowers, and the object used by Rollo to sow cataclysm.

It is the bell's eyes which bring Rollo to his senses and makes him realize how insidious the NRC boys truly are. In leaving him to his own devices, knowing that the Bell knows the truth while others continue to praise him for what are ultimately lies will plague him with never-ending guilt and remorse. Even if Rollo doesn't automatically acknowledge those feelings, there will still always be an unconscious part of him that does--must like how there's a part of him that seeks salvation for others as an unspoken excuse to seek salvation for himself. He calls others monsters, but does not look in the mirror and see himself for the monster that he is. The problem with Rollo is that he deflects and blames others rather than accepting his share of the responsibility for tragedies, and so forcing him into a situation where he is forced to confront his role in committing great evil or live every day with that burden, is his own living hell. Rollo says it himself: the "villains" of NRC are well-versed in "tormenting" people.

Living on with the weight of his sins is literally a fate WORSE than death for Rollo specifically. He is someone who has had a history of internalizing guilt already (as is evident in his motivations and backstory), so this is where it will hurt him most. Rollo has to go around every day with full awareness of what he did, and knowing that if it were to ever get out, he’d likely be seen completely differently by his peers, maybe even become a social pariah. And that’s the point. In realizing that others will judge him differently when they know of his “true” self, Rollo has the chance to see his own rights as “wrong”. He is being left with himself and his festering thoughts, with his sin–something he can never, EVER be rid of. Every day, he will pass by the statue of the Just Judge, an admirable role model for justice, a figure whom others believe you live up to, knowing he has buried his own sins that the Judge would have wished eradicated. Every day, those intense feelings of guilt, shame, and regret will be with him, eating away at him, and Rollo will suffer immensely as a result. “There is nothing that would torment Flamme more than this, correct?” Malleus says. Rollo himself also acknowledges that this would make him suffer; both parties are confessing that this is the best course of recompense for Rollo.

This is a slightly different scenario than other serious situations kept hidden from the public, such as Jamil and Vil's Overblots. In those cases, their OBs were not kept secret in order to punish them, but rather to shield their families and/or the public from the knowledge that they had lost themselves. Unlike Jamil and Vil, Rollo ISN'T worried about how his actions may impact others, and he isn't remorseful or apologetic, because he still refuses to see he is wrong and refuses to change. When faced with this stubbornness, the NRC students have chosen to make him "look in a mirror" first. That is a process that will bring him great pain in the actual setting of the world and its story--but at the same time, it does a favor for the fans by offering Rollo a chance at redemption, much like the OB boys have.

From another angle, this is also the oddly kind thing to do in regards to those in Rollo’s life. No one has to suffer with the knowledge that their “golden boy” has committed a grave sin well, except that one gargoyle. They can keep living on in blissful ignorance... and thus put further strain on Rollo mentally, who will face his punishment ALONE, just as he did when lashing out at all magicians. This is something that Idia points out: that Rollo is allowed to be upset, that he is allowed to rampage, but that he shouldn’t hurt others or get them involved with his own rage. And now, like he did with his crimson flower plot, Rollo is alone in the aftermath.

In another way, this fate is a cool parallel because of Rollo being twisted from Frollo. If you watch the opening to the Hunchback of Notre Dame movie, Frollo comes close to killing baby Quasimodo because he is so repulsed by his deformed appearance. However, as another character points out to Frollo in that scene, he can never “hide from the eyes of Notre Dame”. This prompts Frollo to take notice of all of the statues surrounding him, their stone eyes staring and silently judging him. It is this that ultimately makes Frollo change his mind about killing Quasimodo, instead choosing to raise him as his own son and bellringer. In Rollo’s case, this is also true. In the NRC boys granting him his freedom and keeping his actions a secret, Rollo will never be able to escape “the eyes of Notre Dame”/the Bell of Salvation. Every person’s wide-eyed, innocent stare or respectful reverence cast upon Rollo will make him recognize he’s living a lie, and it will only intensify his guilt… and guilt, as we’ve already seen with how Rollo coped with the loss of his brother, can eat a man from the inside out.

“What [he] wants to save is not his brother or the world... but himself,” Idia states atop the bell tower--and by refusing this “salvation” to Rollo, who believed so desperately that he is not the villain of this story, he will never be liberated. And if he doesn’t believe with all his heart that everyone else are the villains and he is the hero, “he wouldn’t be able to live with himself”, as Azul puts it. It’s eternal damnation for Rollo—at the hands of his own inner demons. 

Later on in the event, we get little hints that maybe Rollo is starting to accept some responsibility for the chaos he has caused (albeit in very small ways), or at least he's conflicted about it. For example, he insists on preparing the venue for the masquerade all by himself, which the NRC boys debate if he's doing to atone or to save face and avoid asking the mages he despises for assistance. No matter the reasoning, the task must be difficult to complete by one person, especially considering Rollo's injuries. Would he allow himself to use magic for such a task?? If he doesn't permit himself this luxury, then it makes the preparations even harder--and yet he somehow still managed to pull it off. This subtly says a lot about how hard he works, but also speaks to his pride and stubbornness.

Rollo gives a speech to those in attendance at the masquerade to address the strange happenings of the night. This is something which Sebek calls out as audacious, as Rollo was the cause of those events to begin with. To this, Azul commends Rollo for his mental fortitude, pointing out that even though Rollo must be extremely conflicted inside, he is hiding the truth of the matter to the public very well. I imagine that these conflicted feelings only ramp up when the NRC boys, whom Rollo has perceived as villains the entirety of the event, present him with a gift that he calls wonderful: performing the Gentle Bell Ringer's song, and singing of hope for the future, something relatable and encouraging in the aftermath of a great disaster. He tries to insult it, calls it a waste of time--but in the end, he goes quiet, moved by the song in spite of himself.

It all culminates in Malleus--the embodiment of magic that Rollo despises--asking to share a dance with him, the one that sought his destruction. During their dance, Rollo swears that he has not given up yet, and that he will never see eye-to-eye with mages. He's still deeply ingrained in his own mindset--but as we've seen with how he reacted to the song and how the NRC boys disagree with how Rollo must be feeling in the moment, the seeds of conflict have been strewn in him. It will take some time before they take root and blossom, but the fact is that his punishment (and, subsequently, his change) has only just scarcely begun.

So ends the Glorious Masquerade, with Rollo sentenced to a fitting end. ***Note: One part of Rollo's punishment that isn't mentioned in a lot of discussions is that Trein has stated he will be in contact with the school board and keeping a close eye on Rollo; this detail is only supplemental to everything else, much like how the dorm members of the OB boys try to offer better social support after the OB incidents, but I thought I should also bring this up.***

[jaal-ama-daravv]

Dragon Age: The Veilguard Review

i need to put my thoughts into words so hear it goes - dragon age veilguard review

keep in mind my playthrough was the following -

female, elf, mourn watch, romanced emmrich, solavellan import, completed 90%.

full spoilers below - you have been warned!

ill add to this if I think of anything through my next playthrough

Combat

Im gonna cop it for this but I fucking loved it. Its literally fantasy Mass Effect Andromeda. and I have ALWAYS, FUCKING HATED STAFFS FOR A MAGE. Now im a mage ninja and im in heaven.

1000/10

Story

Ill keep this short in a few words -

This is if Mass Effect 2, Mass Effect 3, and Dragon Age 2 had a lovechild. Mass Effect 2 ending choices and companion focus, Mass Effect 3 cinematics with pizazz and impact, Dragon Age 2 haha and compantion depth.

I was genuinely in shock for some outcomes/consequences but other times im like, what, is that IT. looking at you lucanis personal quest

I wish they put more weight on the 'this may be my final mission' but I digress.

The pace was good.

minimal cameos????? I feel bad for anyone who romanced someone in inquisition that wasnt dorian or solas

I was violently sobbing at numerous points and cheering at others. The choices I made, made a difference.

7/10

Solavellan/Solas

Bioware did a good job. They ticked every fucking box for ME personally when it came to the reunion and the ending.

I called it when I said that Solas would turn around and go 'vhenan'.

also talking love to eachother in elvhen? jesus fuck my heart.

I will add that at times i felt like the game was pushing me to hate solas, where if you are coming in from a solavellan experience, can be offputting

I do think they couldve added more OOMPF to solas and his regrets. like one regret about the inquisitor, or mention. but solas keeping his vhenan card close to his chest till the end made me fucking cry like a baby so

regardless, 10/10

Romance w/ Emmrich

I LOVED this romance. It was very well written and suave. The main choice in Emmrich's personal quest does have an impact and I love that. I chose for Emmrich to choose mortality over lichdom in a 'face your fears' type of way.

the romance scene is quirky. sad boy hours there is no naked emmrich.

long story short, sacrificing lichdom causes Emmrich to clench up more and insists that he is a burden to you due to the age difference. The romance still continues but in the LICH path, Emmrich expresses that he is afraid to mourn you for eternity. which i think is way hotter. PLUS. I can HC that my rook seeks lichdom too.

The argument scene has left a hole in my heart

9/10

devastated there is like FOUR WORDS in the epilogue about any romance.

therefore, 8/10

im tired of writing fanfcition bioware just give it to me in game

argument scene

Epilogue

Now this, I have an issue with. It is way too vague. There is no mention of what the companions get up to next, and minimal mention of the world state following the final quest. I mainly remember it just telling me the story isnt over. It is pure sequel baiting, which they couldve still done AND mentioned brief 'what the got up to'. BUT, I shouldnt be too surprised considering this happened with Inquisition as well. Also, huge set up for Rook to be the protagonist in the next game too. WHERE IS THE EPILOGUE SCREEN ABOUT WHAT THEY GET UP TO. I cant with it. Don't get me started on the sequel baiting for a BIG BAD guy in the secret post credit scene where they claim to control all the whacked out characters in the past.

5/10

~~

this is mainly me ranting and/or loving it and my personal views after my initial playthrough

i also love bioware where I will play everything they put out and be thankful I am recieiving something, but do wish they would learn from their mistakes.

[cosinelanguage]

Some extended author's notes on heavy boots, since it took me so long to complete haha. Consider this an appendix of notes I used as background info in my fic (kind of. I have more unfortunately)

Fic Premise:

The entire premise was kind of like a big play on role swaps as a concept. I really, really adore role swaps, but it's kind of difficult to actually write a role swap for one piece given how inherently tied to character's motivations, backstories, and designs their roles are.

I basically couldn't imagine Robin without having some in-depth curiosity and desire to understand the world, and I'm incapable of taking Zeff out of Sanji's backstory (since that ends up changing a lot of what I like about Sanji). But I still wanted Blackleg Robin!!

so, I had my cake and ate it too: Sanji was still raised by Zeff, and so was Robin. The entire thing became a role-swap-but-not-actually. I'm an indulgent person.

Sanji Timeline:

I had to think through a huge amount of details on what Sanji's entire deal was, most of which did NOT make it into the fic, since his backstory changed the most and it's. sanji. he wouldn't offer this information willingly.

Roughly how this works: Germa is working on a delicate balance of World Domination plans that involves being closely aligned with both the World Government AND Big Mom (secretly). They're using Sanji as stepping stone for Big Mom initially, and when the marriage alliance falls through, they use him as the fall guy as necessary to their plans-- i.e. if they get called out for working with pirates, they say it’s Sanji acting alone. 

So by consequence, even after his marriage falls through, he gets sent to Alabasta to work with Crocodile, and all that comes with it

17: despite aligning with WG, Germa takes Sanji back in order to form an alliance with Big Mom

17-20: Extended courtship with Pudding extended courtship-- she goes to North Blue instead of Sanji going to Whole Cake. Pudding after Germa/gov secrets the whole time.

20: Marriage at 20 (Sanji does find out marriage is a scam. Sorry Sanji.)

20: Ohara, Reiju in moment of guilt saves Robin

22: WG is Not pleased with germa’s secret alliance w Big Mom

22: Pudding unlocks the ability to read Poneglyphs

22: Sanji Gets Divorced, and Pudding steals his happier memories a bit selfishly. (convenient for me, the author, who has not thought the details through

22-24: I Don't Know

24-28: Sanji's used as a scapegoat/spy on Crocodile, since any further connection to pirates would be scrutinized

anyway. the reason sanji still gets married is I think him being divorced adds to his terrible vibe of this 28-year-old line cook kidnapped by teenagers. so I constructed an entire timeline for that.

Random Details:

A couple of random details I couldn't really fit into the fic itself:

Long-term I imagine Robin actually taking up more of the wings of the pirate king role. She fights now! It’s great! Let me have this. Sanji takes a much more clearly support role, emphasizing more his spy/sidequest stuff and adopting Robin’s protectiveness of her crew.

Mr. Ash Wednesday was definitely a stretch as a codename– one, with Crocodile’s ‘women are days and men are numbers’ naming scheme, and two with Vivi already being Wednesday. But Ash Wednesday fits as a direct motif (smoking) AND it fits because Ash Wednesday is a miserable little holiday about fasting and welcoming in the peak Catholic Guilt season of Lent. so! perfect for Sanji here, who is wallowing in a pool of his own misery.

A lot of Sanji's relationships with the rest of the crew change fairly dramatically, and it's the main reason I'd consider revisiting the role swap. Usopp in particular is kind of fascinating-- Sanji is pretty dead set on the fact that he's convinced he's going to die sooner rather than later, so he wants to teach this idiot crew as much as he can. But Usopp probably just looks and sees Sanji as a better sniper and a better fit for the crew. Brutal.

Marionette:

Marionette is the cornerstone to a lot of the relationships and character beats in the fic overall-- to the extend that multiple exact beats of dialog are repeated throughout (Robin's intro with Zeff has he repeating Sanji's last words, Sanji tells Robin some word for word advice on just surviving under Germa, etc). I have a lot of notes on just how much this like, 4k prequel is repeated and paralleled in the actual fic, but the sum of it is basically that everyone (Sanji, Zeff, Reiju) are held down by this one moment for their primary motivation, and Robin both accidentally and on purpose leverages that specific pain.

ORIGINAL premise:

this all started as a thought exercise on how a reverse-order Straw Hats recruitment order would work, and ended with one of the most confusing premises to write a fic summary for.

I have some notes on how the other swaps would go, and only one of them I think I'd consider writing:

Robin & Sanji roleswap: look this is an entire fic!! kind of. The initial premise was a reverse order recruitment, and NOT an entire role swap. But, really, Robin and Sanji are pretty easy to swap, outside of them not having a cook until the Grand Line.

Zoro & Jinbe: this premise IMMEDIATELY fell apart on how difficult this would be to write. Jinbe requires a lot of re-world building to introduce early, and his dynamic on the crew is very much reliant on his experience. (which is fun! just... requires a lot of extrapolation). An age-swapped Zoro also complicates the premise, since there's something antithetical to One Piece about not handing off a dream like Zoro's to the next generation to complete. thanks, zoro.

Nami & Franky: I abandoned order immediately, ok. I just think Franky works well in an early role like Nami's, specifically because it can be much easier to write Franky's shipbuilding as something another pirate would try to blackmail him into their crew for (over Brook's singing, sorry Brook). He seems extremely fun and energetic to write as a younger version of himself, especially with any added sibling angst. Nami on the other hand as a more jaded older version of herself, running a Thief's Guild on Water 7 that ransacks the place every time there's a storm?????? really really good

Usopp & Brook: Early recruit musician is EXTREMELY cute to me, so Brook being in Usopp's role made a lot of sense. Like Jinbe, it requires a lot of extrapolation, more than I'm capable of, to imagine exactly how a younger Brook un-devil-fruited would behave. Usopp, on the other hand, is devastating to me: Usopp joins a pirate crew at the same age as canon, and sticks around a bit longer than he thinks he’s worth. In the end, he’s not part of the crew for long until all still die, listening and riffing off Usopp’s final story as they all go one by one, until he’s left with an empty boat and fake tall tales of a pirate crew he’d never really been a part of.

:) anyway the usopp one is great. sorry usopp.

Writing Thoughts:

haha, this whole thing has kind of been an exercise in figuring out 'hey maybe it's good to finish the full thing before posting.' Overall, I think this fic struggles a lot with pacing-- the earlier chapters are paced like how I'd do a 5+1 (scene-based sketches with only details necessary to paint the picture), but the later ones are paced like how I'd do a case fic (fight scenes, me paying attention to the plot rather than just the character thread of the scene)

imo it turns out a bit disjointed from that, and if I were a more patient person I could solve this in the edit

but I am not :) instead this will just be a nice lesson for future me whenever I decide to write a long fic again (Unlikely)