#he thought playing the main character would not come with any consequences

[kat-shii]

His wisdom dropped after that. /j

Forever LOLing at leanders green eye shines. Like u have got to have fucked urself up at a fundamental level for that

[somerandomdudelmao]

Ok, so, some marble sky thoughts? Character analysis? Whatever this is! 

I think the only reason that both Oscar and Ward are still alive is because Oscar was left to his own devices with the marmors. 

There are several contributing factors to this thought, but I think it boils down to two main factors: friendliness (towards the marmors), and morality.

First point: as far as i can tell, Oscar genuinely cares about Ecliptica to some extent. My example is when he clubbed that teegardian–the look on his face, and how fast he reacted, suggest that he reacted on gut instinct because Ecliptica was in danger, not that he had a cunning plan to make himself look better. As well as the fact that he genuinely seems to enjoy being around her, and voluntarily spends time with her–I think that this has convinced (some) of the marmors that Oscar is trustworthy, or at the very least not a threat.

On the other hand, Ward has shown that so far at least, he does not like or trust any of the marmors. Now I certainly can’t blame him for that, but it doesn’t do much towards gaining him any favor in the marmor’s eyes (or, sensor things).

My next point is that Ward seems to have a very strong moral code, and acts according to that code regardless of consequences, which restricts him in a way that Oscar doesn’t seem to be restricted. With the teegardian situation, I think Ward would either have straight up refused to be a hunting dog, or tried to help the teegardians, resulting in getting himself killed. 

On the other hand, Oscar, by playing along with the marmors and siding against the teegardians, managed to get into good enough graces with Ecliptica to be able to help Ward (and Holly). Now, I don't think Oscar lacks a moral code, or is trying to be evil or anything–I think he is doing everything he can to protect the people he cares about, and to stay alive. So far, he’s been pretty darn effective too. I also can’t blame him for prioritizing his life, and the life of his friend, over those of complete strangers, especially in such a morally gray area of how intelligent of a species is it ok to eat, and how to define intelligence at all. 

Oscar seems to be doing whatever he feels he needs to in order to keep himself and the people he cares about alive, regardless of “right” and “wrong”. 

Ward also seems to want to keep them both alive, but in contrast he is very attached to his idea of morality, defending what he believes to be right, and fighting against what he believes is wrong.

Because of this, I think Ward and Oscar would have (and probably will in the future) come into conflict because of their different ways of doing things, potentially really messing up each other’s various plans and ideas, in ways that are not conducive towards staying alive and/or friends. 

Also, unrelated theory, Ward is absolutely about to polymorph into an alien cyborg bc of whatever it was that Sculptor did to him

OH THIS

THIS IS SOME REALLY INTERESTING THOUGHTS RIGHT HERE >:D

[vegalovescake]

Whats going on with Vasily's injuries?

I've seen multiple people talk about this here, and since I'm a biomedical student I thought I'd add my two cents as well! (Not that I'm any kind of expert; I just like bringing two of my interests together. I might get some stuff wrong, so make sure to do your own research as well)

My aim here is to find a realistic explaination for how his injury is depicted in the manga, explore which consequences it would have short- and long term and maybe even draw some conclusions about Vasily as a person based on how he handles it (spoiler: he scares me)

Disclaimer: While I didn't include any images, this might get a little graphic description-wise, so be aware if you're sensitive about that kind of stuff.

Also, this is in no way meant to dictate how artists/writers should depict his wounds. Noda does not care much about realism when his characters get injured, so you shouldn't have to, either. Plus, there is a lot of room for subjective interpretation, as you will see. Feel free to grab any of this as inspo for your work, though! (I'm sure I've been put on several government lists while researching for this post, you're welcome)

Yes this is basically an entire essay. When I say I am unwell about this character I mean it.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

To start off, let's take a look on the information the canon provides us about Vasily's injuries.

Vasily was shot by Ogata with a Berdan M1870 rifle. The bullet entered his right cheek and exited the left.

The shot destroyed all of his molars (or damaged them enough to require their removal afterwards).

As a consequence, he has trouble eating and does not talk. Wether that is by choice or because he is unable to we do not know.

In the two panels we see them he's shown to have scars on his cheeks; with the one on his left bigger than the right. The panels are too small to make out any details, but Shiraishi seems disturbed when he sees them for the first time.

As you can see, it's not much, and they raise more questions than they answers (just like anything about Vasya, really). I am willing to speculate, though, based on what we know about bullet wounds in real life, and what would make the most sense in context of the story.

First, I want to look at the immediate effects of Ogata's shot. What is the extend of the damage, which structures would be affected, and is the depiction of his injury in canon plausible?

I always thought Ogata used his Arisaka Type 38 to shoot Vasily since he had urged Shiraishi to retrieve it for him just before, but upon reread I realised that he was still using the Berdan II he borrowed from the Ainu. Why does this matter? Well, I don't know if Noda considered this, but the Berdan is a higher caliber and apparently much more destructive than the Type 38 (the latter's lack of fire power coming into play when Ogata fails to kill Suigimoto, for example. Ironically, the Berdan is also the rifle Vas' namesake, Vasily Zaitsev, allegedly learned to shoot with) Unfortunately for Vasily, this means more extensive damage than if Ogata had used his go-to rifle.

Knowing the type of rifle and ammunition is a good starting point to figure out what Vasily's injuries would look like. Well, kind of.

I'm sure this is the main question Vasily artists are curious about, but it's also one of the hardest to answer because injuries caused by the same rifle can vary heavily based on speed, angle, body part, and the underlying tissue affecting the bullet's impact.

Generally speaking, if the bullet enters at a 90 degree angle, the entry wound is about the same size and shape as the projectile itself. The Berdan M1870 uses 10.75×58mm ammunition, so in this specific case it would be about 1.1 cm or 0.43 inches in diameter. The hole could very well be larger if the bullet enters at an angle, or a little smaller if the skin is elastic and gets pushed into the hole. Anything between 1-2 cm sounds reasonable, honestly.

The exit wound is way harder to speculate on as it entirely depends on the tissue the bullet travels through. Muscles and fat are quite elastic and can transfer the impact of the bullet relatively well, while bone absorbs the force, distributing it through a larger area.

Because Vasily's teeth were hit. there was at least some sort of shattering effect (of both teeth fragments and the bullet itself), and while my knowledge of physics is too limited to determine any details it's pretty safe to say that the exit wound would in fact end up much larger, just like depicted in the manga. To what extend is difficult to say, but considering Vas is up and running a few months after getting shot, I would guess he got rather lucky and the bullets went through relatively smoothly instead of taking apart the entire left side of his face. Still, we'd be looking at a 4-5 cm (1.2-1.5 inch) exit wound at the very least. Additionally, it would likely be much more irregular and jagged, so it might extend to his lip or his jaw depending on the angle.

(Note: You might be wondering by now why I'm not just using the (likely) inspiration for Vasily's injury, Simo Häyhä, as reference for his wounds' appearance. While I like the idea, Hähyä was hit by an explosive bullet that caused a blast effect unlike normal ammunition would have, and so it would not be quite accurate for the sake of this post. We will come back to him later, though.)

No matter the size of entry/exit wound though, Vasily losing teeth in a larger area is plausible because of the force distribution as mentioned above. I'd even argue that the shot in the manga would also take apart his pre molars and canines at the very least (that's why I tend to place it further back). His jaw bone would probably crack or fracture as well, but that might have been a result of the impact rather than the bullet itself (again, I'm assuming he got lucky here because if his jaw was shattered in any major way we would not see him again in the story)

As for the structure in his cheeks, the primary muscles affected would be the buccinator, the masseter, the zygomaticus and the risorius, as well as potentially some of the musculature of the lip and TMJ. I won't bore you with any details, but the areas impacted by those getting injured are the jaw, the corners of the mouth, and potentially the upper lip. The nerve innervating their movements is located in the cheeks as well, so depending on the extend of the damage the restrictions might be temporary or permanent, the latter being more likely on the left where the larger exit wound is. Vasily would definitely have a hard time opening and closing his mouth, and with expressions such as as smiling, snarling or frowning.

Another muscle that would most likely get injured is his tongue. This is a problem because unlike the cheeks' relatively minor blood supply, the tongue bleeds a lot when damaged. Again, if we assume that Vasily got lucky, surviving the initial shot is plausible, but the oral bleeding would definitely be an issue both because of blood loss and the extremly high risk of choking if he passes out. This has the horrifying implication of him staying lucid after getting hit- which despite everything might actually be possible, at least for long enough to get the bleeding to stop. Adrenaline has made people stay conscious through stuff like losing their limbs, after all. Or he simply got lucky once again. That is for fanfic writers to decide, I suppose.

The potential tongue injury will also be important for my next point: Discussing Vasily's lack of speech.

For the reasons above, it is fair to assume that he does not talk because it is simply way too painful. (This seems to be the explanation Sugimoto goes with as well, though it's most likely just a guess and not necessairly the objective truth). The injuries to his jaw muscles and missing teeth might make his speech sound awkward for a while as well, though not permanently (he might keep a lisp in case part of his musculature did get paralysed, though).

In that case, talking would not be impossible, just more difficult. In tense/important situations, one might expect him to try saying something, or at least produce a sound other than his "hmph!". But even Ogata cannot get a word out of him, nor does having to alert people to a potential danger. Personally, I don't think the pain would stop him to that degree. Is he just incredibly stubborn and not much of a talker to begin with? Or could there be a reason why he genuinely cannot speak at all?

With the injuries provided, the only explanation as far as I know is that his tongue got so damaged that he lost most of it, or it had to be removed afterwards due to infection or extensive trauma to the nerves. A missing tip of the tongue is enough to make your speech slurred, and losing most of the oral (movable) part makes talking nearly impossible as it is essential to form most of the sounds of our language. If you want, you can test this by trying to read out a sentence without moving your tongue from the bottom of your mouth. It turns everything into an incoherent mess.

Now, I'm just gonna assume that if that is the case, Vasily would still keep enough of the basal part of his tongue to close the back of his throat, otherwise his quality of life would be reduced drastically and he'd require extensive rehabilitation to not choke on his own spit. But even with some parts remaining, he would be struggeling a lot with chewing and swallowing, especially with a lack of molars on top of that. One can learn to eat most foods without teeth (as demonstrated by my cat Gucci, who eats everything despite having only his canines left), but until his gums and jaw have healed, Vas would be limited to very soft and liquid foods. As a soldier, he'd probably lose a lot of weight and especially muscle mass in the weeks and months after the injury as a result, so it is no suprise he could barely defend himself against Sugimoto (I like to think that's also why he looks so much smaller in his coat after his initial appearance lol).

Alright, now that we've looked at all the immediate stuff, let's talk about healing. Despite how extensive his injuries are, I think that with surgery and proper medical treatment, they could close up pretty well. The tissue loss around the exit wound is likely extensive enough that there would remain a noticable depression in his cheek, as well as the possible paralysis/limited movement of the jaw mentioned above. There is also a possibility of infection and keloid/hypertrophic scarring that might complicate the healing process and make the wound look worse, but those all can be fixed with additional surgeries. Facial reconstruction wasn't unusual for those types of injuries.

That would be the end of it, but one thing bothers me, still: Shiraishi's horrified reaction upon seeing Vasily's face. While the initial wound would be quite bloody, post surgery it should look pretty clean. Shiraishi has seen much worse than a healing bullet wound, right?

Well, there's one last aspect to Vasily's injury story that disturbs me more to think about than the initial wound itself: Instead of recovering, he is chasing Ogata.

The timeline of Golden Kamuy is vague and I do not feel like doing the math to figure out the exact timeline between Vasily getting shot and him joining Sugimoto's group, but we do know that they both happen during the same season (winter). I'd give it 2, maybe 3 months at the longest, maybe even less considering he gets shot just before Ogata loses his eye and shows up right after Ogata's hospital stunt. I'd assume Ogata did that as soon as he was physically able to, but not yet recovered enough to continue being a nuisance for another few weeks/months.

Even if it took Vasya no time to find Sugimoto and he was in the hospital until then (which I doubt), that is not enough time for him to properly recover. If he pulled an Ogata and left the hospital as soon as he was able, there was very little time for his wounds to even begin closing, let alone healing. For comparison, Simo Hähyä was in the hospital for months, and out of commission for several years after his facial injury. Vasily would need at least half a year, or at least more than like, 8 weeks.

I know, I know, the reason for this is that Noda most likely did not consider the extend of his injuries, but lets just assume Vasily was a real guy who decided this was the way to proceed. I have several concerns. First, the pain management. Unless he smuggled some pain meds out of the hospital and is high as a kite the entire part of the plot hes in he would be in constant agony, yet he still decides that his revenge plot against this random guy is somehow more important. He could simply have an incredibly high pain tolerance, sure, but that wouldn't help dealing with the other major problem of wandering around the wilderness with a partially open facial wound: Sooner or later it is bound to get infected, and once that happens there's a good chance he might kick the bucket after all. Of course, Asirpa could try and prevent this, but what about before he happens to join the Sugi squad? Did he simply flush his mouth with Vodka and call it a day, hoping he would last long enough to take Ogata with him? Did he get some sort of medical training and knows basic wound care? Or was he so fixated that he didn't even consider how bad of an idea this was? Who knows.

What this would explain, however, is why his scars might look much worse than they should. Injuries that keep reopening or get irritated constantly heal slower and more crudely, and they can be really gross to look at, to the point where you can't tell wether or not the wound is fresh. Even if the initial bullet wounds were fairly small, the scarring could easily end up covering a large part of Vasily's face if he didn't take proper care of them. This is what I meant with his scars reflecting his personality, too; depending how he would handle his injuries, his scarring might end up more or less extensive!

---------------------------------------------------------------

So, a lot of words to say that there are many possibilities on how to depict Vasya's scars, even if you care about realism. Sorry this ended up as long as it is, but I've thought about this a lot and wanted to share in case someone finds it helpful! Though, I always encourage to do your own research if this interests you, the conclusions I came to here are very much biased by my own interpretations and I did not cover everything there is to say.

TL;DR Vasily is a medical liability and I want a spin off featuring his nurse beating his ass after he returns to Russia.

[superbat-lmao]

Something that Bruce never meant to teach his kids was his methodology for a “final” contingency plan.

Over half of the time, operations that involve Batman’s plans are completed within the first ten acceptable contingencies. Sometimes people are injured, sometimes people unaccounted for are injured, and more often their estimates on property damage were low.

The other half of the time, when pushed beyond the ten most acceptable contingencies, more severe consequences are incurred. People are in comas, teammates lose a limb, anything shy of a permanent solution.

But Bruce, he has a final contingency for every scenario. His one true failsafe.

Self sacrifice.

At the absolute bottom of the barrel, after scraping clean the dregs themselves, in the space between the atoms of the wooden cask, is the final solution. Bruce sacrificing himself to save an enemy, a teammate, his city, the world, his galaxy, the universe. He is willing to take that hit. Only if he has to exhaust all other plans to reach that point.

His children don’t have the same compunction. It scares the hell out of him when one of them goes for the “final play” as though it’s one of the first ten contingencies. His kids think he’s a hypocrite, holding them to different standards than himself.

The one who takes after this particular mindset of his the most, is Jason.

Jason makes plans with brutal efficiency, but that rely on brutal methods. He discounts non-lethal plans in ways Bruce can’t fathom. Not always, but without a logic Bruce can follow.

He’s the only one of Bruce’s children that has successfully carried out a final plan. To the point that he always sees it as an option. He walks into a lion’s den guns blazing with little thought about extraction if it doesn’t go well. It terrifies Bruce.

Over the course of two separate movie nights, Bruce pieces together the issue.

The first movie night is a marathon of the Lord of the Rings extended editions. When Samwise is telling Frodo they will have to stretch their food for the journey home. The fact that Frodo hadn’t considered rationing supplies because he didn’t expect to return home sits uneasily with Bruce long after the credits have rolled.

The second was a movie chosen by Tim as part of a rotation. It was some science fiction film called Gattaca, about genetic engineering. In it, a man wants to go to space but lives in a world where everyone is genetically engineered at birth. It’s a scene with two brothers swimming in the ocean. The movie is trying to set up that people can’t exceed their own limits. The brother who was not engineered can swim farther than the brother who was, it is the real thesis of the movie. It comes to a point when the one asks how the other does it. How does he keep going, keep succeeding, doing better than others who were literally made to be better than him. It’s the scene in the ocean, each trying to swim further than the other. When the main character answers, it’s that he never saved any energy for the swim back to shore. Every single thing he accomplished in life was because he devoted himself singularly to the goal, didn’t plan for failure. If he had drowned in the ocean it would have been because he didn’t conserve enough energy to get back to shore. His mentality is that he never even considered it.

Jason is the only one who has been past the point of no return and still returned. He is both Frodo and Vincent, not planning for the return trip. It is something Bruce wishes he never taught his son.

[zepumpkineater]

do we got any thoughts on Dedmos specifically...

Dedmos is an interesting one since Deimos himself probably has the most strongly defined personality out of anyone in the SQ side of the main cast. Characters like Hank of course are under tons of interpretations all the time, which is in part intentional. Sanford's personality is defined, but he's still fairly different across fan interpretations. Deimos, on the other hand, I find to be the most consistent in this regard.

Most folks can agree he's the cocky, bad mouthing, gun toting, cigarette loving mercenary we've all come to know and love over the years, which is why I find it the most fascinating that it was him Krinkels chose to drag through the other place's cavalcade of personalized horrors that is the Dedmos Adventures series.

Dedmos as a series definitely slots into some of my favorite content that has come out of Madness Combat over the years, namely through its greater focus on psychological horror elements and deconstruction of its titular character. It's very Silent Hill 2, and I love that game to bits, so it's only natural I found myself really loving Dedmos.

And in terms of the character of Dedmos, I think there's a lot of fascinating lore implications that may or may not be explored somewhere down the line in another piece of Madness media. As I said before, Deimos being such a strongly defined character with a clear personality is a huge part of what makes Dedmos so good, because it quite literally strips away layers of that personality with each passing episode. We learn a lot about Deimos as a person as the very fabric of his being is stripped away, layer by layer, until he's nearly unrecognizable by the series' end.

I love how Dedmos as a series preys on Deimos' personality, his insecurities, and his worries. Outside of all of the physical torment Deimos endures, we also see him suffer mentally. I definitely think that scene where Deimos sees an apparition of Sanford and desperately runs over to it forever rewrote how I view Madness Combat as a series. That one little scene and series of actions forever recontexualized not only the events of the series, but Sanford and Deimos' relationship as a whole for me.

Even after being beaten, battered, losing pieces of himself that he will never get back, part of him still urges him along to chase down something familiar, something he knows in this desolate place. This action is of course immediately punished as is classic Other Place fashion, but the fact that it happened at all is deeply telling to Deimos as a character. I think it's proof that Krinkels thinks about these characters in a much more three dimensional way than what may be immediately made clear by Madness Combat at large. It shows that there's real emotion, real stakes in this series, and that's something long time fans of the cartoons never knew could happen.

All in all, I do hope the consequences of the events of Dedmos are at least partially explored in Madness 13, or whatever side content comes out before or after that cartoon's release. The way I see it, Deimos has been forever changed by his time in the other place, and he has lost pieces of his very soul that will never be returned to him. Who knows how much of him has been lost, and if it can ever be truly repaired.

If I were in charge of writing Dedmos, I think I would absolutely bring a greater focus on how hollow he must feel. Pieces of himself gone, filled out with lifeless rocks. I would write about how other characters, especially Sanford, notice how awkward and stilted he feels. Deimos knows who he is on a fundamental level, there are aspects of him that will not, cannot be changed for as long as even a fragment of him exists. But he can't help but notice how it feels like he has to force it out, sometimes. He knows the part he's supposed to play, the jokes he's supposed to make, the cocky and snide remarks, but it just feels...Empty, sometimes. Like he's pretending to be someone he used to be, not acting like someone he is. Memories that he knows are his, but feels like they're someone elses' entirely.

Not to mention the strain it might put on his relationship with Sanford. It can't be fun to see your best buddy die, and not only die, but come back different. Changed in a way that makes it difficult to recognize him sometimes. He's got mostly the same face, the parts of it that are left, roughly the same clothes. Same dorky hat and bulky headphones, anyway. But the way he carries himself is just...Different. Heavier. More subdued. His jokes land awkwardly and he stumbles over his words. He's quieter, still the occasional sarcastic remark, but sometimes they almost feel mean-spirited rather than playful.

I could go on really, but the point is I really love Dedmos the series and Dedmos the character. Krinkels 200% cooked with that side series.

[siggiedraws]

i come to you about new official content once more... new changes to the character bios on sonic channel, i wanted to hear any thoughts you had on it

https://x.com/Sephys00/status/1904938734480404664

the most outstanding one to me is "shadow doesn't care about good or evil" which feels like is directly contradicted by his actions throughout the games, even in shadow gens. i feel like calling his methods unorthodox or sometimes antagonistic, but still caring about doing what he thinks is right would be a better way to describe this?? lmk if im wrong though

Oh, interesting! I feel a little out of my element here because I actually don't see anything wrong with this, so the animosity towards it on Twitter is a little shocking to me. I hope I can try to explain well why I don't see anything wrong with the sentiment of Shadow not being interested in good or evil. Shadow is a character who's very focused around character development and I'm aware he's not the same as he used to be so I'll avoid using evidence from games like SA2 and Shadow.

So, the way I'm interpreting this is that Shadow isn't interested in morality and what is seen as good or evil. When he acts, he doesn't care about whether it is considered a good or evil action. Shadow's bio brings up how Shadow is hard-headed and willing to do anything to achieve his goals, which plays into the "good and evil" bit. He will defy what is seen as moral or the right thing to do, with no boundaries on what isn't okay to do, and Forces actually has a good showcase of this in action. Shadow, with the goal of destroying Eggman's facility, kills the Jackal squad because they were hired by Eggman to defend the facility. Then, Shadow even makes a taunting remark after killing them. He doesn't feel any remorse for it. So, I think Shadow not caring about what is morally right makes sense. He's so determined in his goals that he will not compromise or pull any punches. They were in his way, so he killed them. Simple.

Shadow is amoral, yet he is also considered a hero because he does the right thing most of the time. Since we've established Shadow does what he wants to achieve his goals no matter the consequences, the reason why Shadow often does things seen as heroic is because his goals align mostly with the interests of those around him. As implied in his Wallpaper Cover Story and by Iizuka in this Anime Expo interview, Shadow's main goal is to protect the planet Maria loves. To elaborate on this, Shadow doesn't necessarily care about what happens to people. He doesn't care about helping others. He cares about the planet. When the planet is in danger, he will save it, which happens to also save people's lives. This may be what causes confusion about his morals, because he's often shown doing heroic actions that save other people, and the vagueness makes his morality hard to pin down.

(you can certainly make a case about how the word "justice" is unfitting for Sonic but the main point I want to focus on here is Shadow)

In Rivals 2, Shadow works with Eggman, which is an example of Shadow still aligning with evil after SA2/Shadow. Shadow explicitly teams up with Eggman because he is told that the world will be destroyed if he doesn't. If we established that Shadow's goal is to protect the planet, he will do anything to achieve his goal, and he is unconcerned with good and evil, then logic reasonably follows that he will align with someone seen as evil if he believes it will achieve his goal of protecting the planet.

In '06, Shadow doesn't care about the world seeing him as evil and persecuting him in the future. He will fight like he always has.

I can see where you're coming from with Shadow Gens and the narrative's focus on the dichotomy between light and dark, with Shadow being tempted by darkness (Black Doom) and ultimately turning to the light (Maria) at the end. Shadow's heroic actions and association with light can be seen as him caring about morality when I think that isn't necessarily the case with Shadow. Near the end of the game, Shadow reemphasizes that he is fighting for Maria's wish for everyone to have a chance to be happy, which fits in with his goal of protecting the planet, which is ultimately an action aligned with heroism and light. It is important to remember that Shadow does it not out of any moral sense of good or evil, more so that his goals happen to align with moral goodness. Maria's virtues have influenced the path Shadow has chosen to take in life, but Shadow isn't Maria. He will fight for Maria's wish via whatever means necessary.

I don't have as much confidence with talking about Shadow's character, but this is how I understand him to be. It's fascinating to consider his mind and way of thinking, and how that informs his actions! I also hope this explanation makes a little bit of sense. I'm more concerned with the "pure intensity" part of his character bio being removed, because I think that's a really good way to describe how Shadow acts and behaves. He's so uncompromising to the point of being dangerous, and I find it really interesting that it's described as "purity." Perhaps that includes being pure of any moral reservations.

Thanks for your ask!

[fkinkindagauche]

II Most Wanted - Complete!

Chapter 7 is up now on AO3! That's a wrap on the main story; I will be posting two smutty epilogues (one for each pairing) next week, so keep your eyes open for that.

Once again, endless thanks to @dame-zoom-a-lot, who is a wonderful beta and also a wonderful human. A delight to know and work with. Give their Harringrove fic Batteries Not Included a read if you're into interesting magical systems, body horror, and enemies to lovers! And then do yourself a favor and read the rest of the Metalsandwich series for which it is a prequel! If you're more into fluffy Steddie smut, try out Timezone. Looking for a delightful feel-good Steddie without smut? Give Let's throw a brick through this spreadsheet a read.

Chapter Summary

Tensions are high in the Secret Society as a consequence of the group's blackmail. Steve gets caught in the crossfire.

Chapter-Specific Content Warnings: gun violence, blood, wounded major character (not badly this time), misogynistic talk

divider by @/saradika-graphics

Steve's anxiety was high as he crawled through the window of Hawkins Lab the following Monday night. He'd spent the past few days having circular arguments with Nancy about whether or not Ron Bagsby had even received the blackmail materials (she was convinced he had, Steve wasn't so sure). None of Nancy's reassurances had been enough to comfort him.

He heard raised voices before he even made it through the window this time. One of the angrier men who'd been arguing for killing Eddie Munson before the last meeting was screaming something about "fucking pussies who need to nut up". Charming.

Everyone went quiet when Steve walked into the room, turning to face him with their masks on.

"Steve. Welcome. There's been some… developments." Ron Bagsby sounded like shit. Steve could hear the exhaustion oozing out of his voice, raspy and thick, a far cry from his usual smooth primetime cadence.

"'Developments', my ass," someone muttered.

"We're no longer targeting Eddie Munson," Ron said, raising his voice above the mutterer. "We'll find another task suitable for you, but please stop any plans you have for the Munson boy."

Steve pretended to look confused. "What? Why?" he asked.

"Some new information has come to light proving the boy's innocence," Ron said.

"Like hell!" another man yelled. "Is the Munson boy bribin' you or something? He got you hooked on his drugs?"

Ron turned to the man. "Be quiet," he hissed. "We'll switch our focus back to finding whoever's been doing the graffiti on the war monument."

There were murmurs of assent from about half of the members of the group, but quite a few others seethed silently. Ron went through the details of their watch schedule outside the monument, giving Steve a few shifts. He seemed to have forgotten for the moment that Steve wasn't actually a member yet.

Ron broke up the meeting after just a few minutes and hastened out of the room. Many of the members followed him, but a few stayed behind, including the angry man. Steve lingered as well, wanting to see where this would go.

"Hey, kid," the angry man said, motioning Steve over. "You really wanna be done with Munson?"

Nancy had mentioned this might happen, that the members who'd been most vocal in support of the murder plan would want to keep going, but Steve was still disappointed. He'd been hoping they could just be fucking done with this shit. But Nancy had instructed Steve to play along if anyone seemed to want to keep going with Eddie.

"Nah, I think it's bullshit," Steve said.

The man nodded. "Good. Thought so. A group of us are gonna meet at the Crown on Thursday night. Be there at 8, we'll see what we can do."

Steve nodded. That was the bar where they'd first approached him. "I'll be there."

Robin groaned when Steve told them about the meeting. "So we're still not done with this?" she whined.

"I'm flattered that I instill such a visceral hate in so many people," Eddie said.

Nancy didn't seem fazed. "I figured something like this would happen. We're gonna need to tell Ron about this other meeting, and threaten to leak the photos and audio if he doesn't stop it."

"How the hell is he gonna stop it?" Steve asked.

"Not sure. I'm hoping Ron and the anti-killing-Eddie faction will show up at the bar, though. It's a public location, so they won't be able to wear robes and masks. At least you'll get a good look at all of them." She paused for a moment, deep in thought. It seemed like she thought more than just that was going to happen, but she didn't say anything else.

Steve's stomach rumbled. He'd skipped dinner to go to the stupid meeting.

"I can make some food," Robin offered, heading to the kitchen. "Sit down, Mr. Espionage. You look exhausted."

"I'll help." Nancy followed Robin into the kitchen.

"I'm not helping," Eddie declared, turning to Steve as if daring him to protest.

"Good," Steve said with a laugh. "You kind of suck at cooking."

Eddie whacked Steve lightly with one of his crutches.

They moved to the couch while Nancy and Robin made dinner in the kitchen, watching TV in companionable silence.

"Wait. Are Nancy and Robin a thing now?" Eddie sounded very surprised.

He had a direct line of sight into the kitchen. Steve looked up to see that Nancy and Robin were currently mid-kiss.

"Oh. Yeah. Walked in on them kissing the other night." Steve frowned. "But Robin's been a little flaky about what exactly they're doing. So I don't know if it's just smoochin' and coochin', or something more."

"Did you just say 'smoochin' and coochin''?"

Steve grinned at Eddie. "Yeah. You know." He made a kissy face. "Smoochin'." Then he thrust his hips into the air. "And coochin'."

"Dear god, how did you ever get women in high school?" Eddie looked horrified.

Steve shrugged. "I think it was the hair. That would explain the disaster of my social life the summer I was forced to wear that stupid Scoops hat."

"That was a good summer," Eddie said with a faraway look in his eyes.

"Yeah. You came in kind of a lot to get ice cream. Like, almost as much as the kids. Were you working at the mall or something?"

Eddie let out a slightly manic laugh. "Nope. Just really like ice cream." He followed this up with a muttered, "And I thought the uniform was great."

Had Eddie been coming to Scoops to see him in his uniform?

"Anyway," Eddie said, changing the subject. "Can you rub my calves?"

As if Steve would ever say no.

Read the full chapter on AO3.

[palmastrings]

Solomon and Levi play Beat saber

For @ificouldbringyouback

@obeymeholidayexchange

The song used for this is called "Crazzee Boi". Feel free to listen to that

-------------------------------------------

Solomon, for the first time in a while, had finally gotten a day off this weekend that wasn't saturated in RAD homework or cleaning up the messes of his demonic or angelic neighbors. Usually, on days like this, he'd resign himself to some cooking, maybe some magical research or experiments, challenging Thirteen to a ‘friendly’ game over his life candle, or simply enjoying the weather, perhaps in the human world. Solomon laid back in bed, musing over the potential activities he could schedule for the day. What did it matter? He had all day to think about it, no need to rush. Solomon fumbled with his DDD, reaching out for it in the darkness of his room. 

It was only 7 am.

 Solomon smiled and tucked himself under his covers, safe from the colder air of his room, and gently placed his DDD back on his nightstand humming a song of sleep to himself.

No sooner had he done that, his DDD rang incessantly.

Solomon reached back for his device to be met with Leviathan's name and his hilariously assigned profile picture of his stressed face while losing a game of chess to Solomon – a game that Leviathan had challenged him to. Picking up the phone, he answered.

“Hello?”

“Solomon, hey! I'm kinda impressed you answered, tbh. You never really seemed like the morning-type to me. Uh, anyways, glad you picked up. You aren't busy today, right?”

Solomon thought for a moment. “You've actually caught me on one of my off days, so yeah, I can make some time. What is it you need?”

“Can you head over here in a few hours? I'll tell you why once you get here.”

 And with that, Levi hung up. Solomon wasn't sure why Levi would withhold the reason for requesting his company unless Levi felt like Solomon would disapprove in any other situation. He’d humor him, though. 

Solomon rubbed the sleep from his eyes and stretched. His body made a plethora of back-breaking sounds that any person would find very squeamish to hear. Ah, the consequences of old age. He started his shower cold, brushed out his white hair with less care than Asmo would approve of, and dressed in more casual clothes than he would normally find himself wearing on a busy day. By the time he cooked and served himself his signature breakfast of his secret ingredient red pancakes and aged, burn-to-a-crisp mini griffin eggs, the time had come for him to head out and meet Levi.

Oddly enough, he found Levi waiting for him at the main entrance of the House of Lamentation. Levi wore uncharacteristically athletic clothing with an anime-themed headband around his forehead, his bangs hiding whatever character was featured on it. Solomon kinda hoped he wasn't going to run some recreational marathon with Levi. His poor old man bones cant take it. He'd been spending a lot of time at his desk rather than in the great outdoors. Maybe the impending dread of what this could be is a sign for him to get back into shape. Ah, well, at least he’d last longer than Levi in a run.

Levi waved Solomon over. As Solomon approached, Levi handed him a device in each hand.

“I can't believe you made it! I was beginning to doubt you would really make the time to meet me, of all people, here on your day off. You truly are a real one, Solomon.”

“Ahaha, you flatter me, Leviathan, I really don't mind at all. But what am I doing here exactly?”

“Well, I'm so glad you asked, Solomon. I invited you here because one of the games I've been playing recently got a new DLC update, and in order to get all of the achievements, I needed another player.”

“Super, but, out of curiosity, why me?” Solomon asked. “I'm sure your brothers would be just as available to play with you.”

“That's why you're different. I called upon you, The Wise King Solomon, for your magical prowess and efficiency!” Levi exclaimed.

“As per usual,” he sighed. “So, what are we playing?”

Levi held up his PC that he had also brought out with him, featuring the title screen ‘Beat Slayer’.

“Isn't it supposed to be Beat Saber?” Solomon inquired.

“What?”

“Never mind.” It seems the Devildom has its own version of human games.

Levi spoke again, “Okay, so the rules are pretty simple. You're gonna hold two sabers in your hands. Music will play in the background while little demonic cubes with teeth fly at you following the rhythm of the music,”

“Wait, wha-”

“You also need to dodge the walls and avoid hitting the bombs. It's pretty self-explanatory. Oh, and you also gain bonus points if you imbue magic into your attacks when the beat drops. Got it? Great!” Levi then proceeded to hand Solomon some enchanted glasses, then ran over to his PC to set things up.

“Aren't there supposed to be VR headsets? What's with these glasses?”

Levi replied while still facing the laptop. “Uh, no? Those glasses are just for setting up the background. It's aesthetic. By the way, I'm putting this on extra hard mode so just be aware you might actually get hurt when doing this.”

“They're real?”

“On any other difficulty they would be illusions, but I need this achievement on the highest difficulty so the game actually summons creatures to fight, walls, etcetera.”

“That sounds like a liability concern.”

“It's Hell, nobody really does that here lol.”

With a shrug of his shoulders, Solomon slipped on the glasses as Levi prepared to start, equipped with his own sabers.

It was a magical sight to behold, which says a lot seeing how much Solomon had witnessed. The world glowed an ethereal purple hue, slowly beating to a non-rhythm. Beams of light danced aimlessly, without music to follow. Two yellow sabers illuminated in his hand like bars of gold. Mammon had probably used these before him. 

He knew he was still in the front yard of the House of Lamentation, but here, the world felt otherworldly, an open plane of soft light swimming across his field of vision.

“Ready?” Levi asked.

“Ready as I'll ever be for my first try.” Solomon smiled.

Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my love

The first cube came, and, as Levi foretold, came fast with a row of awaiting teeth. Solomon struck through it and followed a line of light so he could slash the second one and the few that came after it. Levi, beside him, moved in sync, their movements mimicking each other.

Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my heart So crazy boy

This didn't seem so terrible, Solomon noted. Not that the thought would last for long, as off in the distance, a barrage of attacks came hurling towards the both of them.

Mohm eh buhl tah oleui nun Guh ttam that fire Mah-eum jahkoo ttulyuh suh Geh sok olyuh higher Ee tah go boh yuh jool soo in nun b boi swag You think you got it but boy I got it like that

“Bonus points, Solomon, get ready!” Levi called. 

Solomon turned to face Levi. Levi stood there with his arms reeled back. His eyes under his glasses glowed orange, with an aura that Solomon could only recognize when Levi was feeling super intense. Looking back at Levi’s saber, Solomon noticed splashes of water appearing out of the air.

 ‘Right, Levi commands the sea, so it makes sense that most of his spells would be water-related’.

 Although that brought the drawback of Solomon's magic being slightly weaker near the presence of the ocean. He figured he’d be fine. Solomon readied himself, feeling the familiar spark of magic in the palms of his hands. He squeezed the handle of his sabers tightly. Finally, when the cubes came close enough, the two were in sync as they struck down. From his peripheral vision, Solomon could see a wave of water follow Levi’s swing, and it effortlessly carved the cube in twain. Solomon followed suit, a glimmer of silver light echoed in his slash. This was a lot more fun than he expected going into this. A side step to the left, and a wall sped by him. 

While most people would be content to brush Levi off for his deemed “childish” hobbies, there was real value in the games he played, whether that be the stories they tell, or the competitive fire that set ablaze in his bones. Something was always new when you visited Levi, it's a shame that Levi tended not to see these qualities in himself like others have.

Myuh ppun ee ruhn mahl hae yah dweh nun deh Turn it up, listen up (okay)

A bomb raced down the path, and the sorcerer only had a second to react and move out of the way. It just barely grazed his hair before it blew up a few feet behind him. The bombs were terribly sensitive. The flames of the explosion didn't touch him though. When he turned back, a wall of water created a barrier between the detonation and Solomon. While Solomon wasn't necessarily worried about the explosion to begin with – he always walks around with a protective spell on him for any and all occasions – he was grateful for Levi's quick reaction time. He turned to him, and they both gave each other a mutual nod of thanks. The music continued playing. Slash 1, 2, 3 cubes, sidestep the wall, avoid the 1, 2, 3 bombs. The lightshow around them beat brighter and faster with the music, and the aimless rays of light from earlier finally moved with purpose.

 Muhn chah boneh ji mah I'm sick and tired of you blowing up My jeonhwa cchok pal ee ji doh an hae Ee tah go boh yuh jool soo in nun play boi swag You think you got it no boy I got it like that

Solomon could feel the sweat gather around his neck. If Levi had told him he’d be so active, he wouldn't have worn a turtleneck. Levi, meanwhile, seemed great. As unathletic as he is, the desire to earn this achievement outclassed his need to stay confined to the comfort and safety of his room. He was actually quite elated to be able to do something like this with someone who seemed to match his own vigor at wanting to win this game. Levi called the dormant magic within him, it bubbled out and came crashing down in walls of water, decimating anything that came to him with a single, clean stroke. Likewise, Solomon put the strength of 1,000 years of sorcery into his own strikes.

As the song neared its end, they kept up the pressure; it became harder to keep up the pace. A cube almost bit a chunk out of Levi’s shoulder if Solomon had not stabbed it, and at this point, the explosions became a constant every few seconds as the music sped up faster. Until finally…

Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my love Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my heart So crazy boy Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my love Oh I think you're crazy Can't have my heart So crazy boy

Together, calling upon the final burst of magic they had, they struck the final cube right down the middle as it burst into sparks as it passed behind them. They both heaved for breath. Solomon wiped the sweat that had accumulated on his face, while Levi almost collapsed on the ground. Levi slipped off his glasses and made his way to his PC. He cheered gleefully at whatever was on his screen. Solomon could only assume it was his newest achievement. He found himself smiling with Levi too. For being a totally unplanned event, this day off ended up being an irreplaceable memory. The little things like this are what made Solomon's life truly worth living to its fullest. He wouldn't have it any other way.

[jowritesfanfiction]

Masculinity in Back to the Future (an essay)

A couple weeks ago, I had to write an essay about Back to the Future for a sociology course. A few people were interested in reading it (@measuresderepo and @yourlocalvastard specifically), so I thought I'd put it out here for anyone to read.

Quick notes before you read: A huge thank you to my friend and my sibling for answering my questions about male friendships. Also I briefly mention sexual assault and sexual harassment as it shows up in the movie. It is not the main focus, but it does come up.

That being said, here's the essay:

One of the most successful films from the 1980s was Back to the Future. For the uninitiated, the film is about Marty McFly, a 1985 teenager who time travels to 1955 and accidentally intervenes in his parents’ meeting, consequently threatening his existence. Most of the movie revolves around Marty teaching his father, George, how to be a man to woo Marty’s mother, Lorraine. The movie explores the theme of masculinity through the characters of Marty, George, and Biff, but deviates from typical depictions of masculinity through Marty’s friendship with Doc.

Marty is the archetypical 1980s cool guy and embodies the cultural ideals of masculinity. He is played by Michael J. Fox. Marty stands up to Biff when he bullies George and harrasses Lorraine. When Lorraine falls in love with him instead of George, she admires these qualities in Marty. Consequently, the movie’s values about masculinity are governed by what Lorraine believes a man should be: “[...] strong so he can stand up for himself and protect the woman he loves.” Since the movie revolves around what Lorraine values in a man, it is fair to assume that Marty is who the movie deems as the ideal man. 

Marty spends the majority of the film socializing his father, George, to fit into traditional gender norms for men. Unlike Marty, George is a pushover and avoids all confrontation or rejection. George would rather peep on Lorraine than ask her to the dance and risk getting rejected. He only pursues Lorraine when “Darth Vader” threatens him. Still, Marty coaches him through flirting and how to “rescue” Lorraine with minimal success. It is only until George punches Biff for taking advantage of Lorraine that he woos Lorraine and becomes the ideal man. These new traits make George confident, financially successful and make both him and his family happier in the future. Through George, the movie suggests that exhibiting these cultural values are guaranteed to make a man happy and successful.

On the other side of the spectrum is Biff. Biff uses his stature and physical strength to intimidate and manipulate others. He coerces George into doing his work because George will not fight back. Biff does not need to stand up for himself because he starts fights with anyone who stands in his way. Rather than protecting the woman he “loves,” Biff uses his strength to harass and violate Lorraine. Biff is the result of taking on the cultural ideals of masculinity to its most extreme, or “toxic masculinity” in modern terms. The movie goes on to show how fragile this form of masculinity is when Biff is challenged by Marty and George. At the end of the movie, Biff no longer has any leverage over George or anyone. Through Biff, the movie shows how cultural ideals of masculinity can be detrimental if taken too far. 

Despite positioning Marty as the ideal man, the movie shows how he deviates from the norm through his friendship with Doc. They function like typical friends, but the degree to which they care for one another differs from typical male friendships. The clearest example of this is when the two are getting ready to send Marty back to 1985. Doc expresses that he is going to miss Marty because Marty has “really made a difference in [his] life.” Before Marty leaves, Marty thanks Doc and because Marty is so grateful for Doc as a friend, Marty hugs Doc. Genuine physical affection between two men is not typical today and was especially not typical for the 1980s. The two share a level of vulnerability that is in direct violation of typical norms of masculinity, but it is what makes their relationship work so well.Back to the Future is a perfect example of what the ideals for masculinity were in the 1980s. Marty exudes the ambition and self-reliance of the era. George learns how to become that ideal man and becomes successful. Biff exemplifies how cultural ideals of masculinity can become damaging. Conversely, Marty and Doc’s emotional vulnerability is a direct subversion of typical norms of masculinity. Perhaps masculinity is not solely about physical strength and protecting a lover, but rather strength of character, vulnerability, and caring for everyone they love romantically and platonically.

[toffeebrews]

eughhh sleepiness is taking over must write about inky boy. ink sans is by @/comyet

i think upon reanalyzing some asks and the FAQ i have begun to understand how inks err emotions work a little better. a bunch of this is me kinda theorizing sooo yeah. it's not as uhh clear as my other rants are

His emotions aren't really "fake". at least my definition of fake. He still feels.

Instead, their main struggle is to balance and understand his emotions. Like in this ask:

So, he can definitely have quote on quote "normal relationships" with other people

One day you may ask him and he'll be like yeah i care about them alot and the next he doesn't feel very attached at all. As i interpreted "not making sense" as to not understanding why or how he even cares for these people. It seems really dependent on his internal emotional balance. The pretending comes in to play where he may exaggerate or lie about his emotions. Perhaps because he himself wants to have these attachments. Or because he wants to spare others feelings.

more yappage under the cut

According to his FAQ, he realizes his soullessness is an advantage (and theres not any realistic/non morally dubious means to obtain one) and wouldn't change that. However, i don't believe he is completely content with some of the drawbacks. He feels the need to hide his soullessness, as indicated in his design notes. But it "shows through". He feels the need to "pretend to have a soul" -from his backstory comic. This may be because he feels insecure in some way. believing his own emotions are less than others. Or his feelings are invalid or fake because he doesn't have a soul. Or at the very least not as real as others. Because he doesn't feel emotions the way others do, it must be wrong. Because hes chaotic neutral, i don't think these are things others contributed to his line of thought. Rather, something hes internalized himself. not that he would ever tell anyone that.

He may also hide this fact not the freak people out. Man does enjoy a bit of mischief, but it probably be kinda hard to work with other people if you have a large chance they may be scared of/don't trust you. I also think he doesn't actually want to like...petrify people. Which i would imagine many monsters would struggle, if they knew. given what people may assume of him. Or at least that's what he thinks ig shsksh.

Given he fears loneliness i think both of these reasons may contribute. He doesn't want people to abandon him. abandonment issues caused by trauma he can't remember.

But he can definitely feel extremes as well. being "overexcited" so much so he forgets consequences. He vomits up ink when shocked or overly passionate. I didn't expand on this as much because i feel like others have explained better than i ever could.

as his FAQ indicates his emotions can be separate from his morality. so its not necessarily contradictory for him to have these big emotions but still have uhh ig a more neutral way of looking at things. ig

btw this post was inspired from this analysis!! i tried to add my own spin on my commentary

[virginiathegray]

On Hardened Companions

I've seen some people wishing that Veilguard had more options to harden a character besides just Lucanis or Neve, so some thoughts: Firstly, I had this opinion while I was playing as well, so I absolutely see the appeal and why this belief occurs. However, after thinking about it more, I don't think it would have worked.

When I started thinking about how each companion could end up hardened, I went down the list and tried to figure out what plot-relevant things might achieve this...and I just kept coming up with events that already happen at the end of each companion quest.

Telling Harding to lean into her anger over the loss of the Titans? Making Emmrich a lich? Lucanis choosing to imprison his cousin even if Traviso was saved? Neve becoming Dock Town's Batman even if Minrathous is still standing? You get the idea.

Those seem like the more "hardened" options for those characters, but...are they? The whole point of those choices (to me) is that they are nuanced and don't have one right answer. Including a mechanic to incentivize one choice over another feels like it misses the point of why the choice is there.

I could go on about this forever, but ultimately let's move forward with the assumption that tying a hardened status to the companion quests would be dissatisfying and we're better off without it. If any other characters can be hardened, it has to come from the main story quests (as they did in the Traviso/Minrathous choice)

And I...can't really think of any?

I mean, I can, they just aren't very good. You could let the Dalish be sacrificed during the Venatori rally near the end of Act 2 and harden Bellara. I'm sure we could do something messed up regarding one of the many dragons in the game that pisses Taash off. Rook could tell Davin after Weisshaput that he's right actually, and he really SHOULD have died! Harding's could...involve the ritual site somehow? If we're a jerk about it or tell her to shut up about her powers? I don't know. I can't even begin to think of what main quest story could upset Emmrich to the point of being hardened, though. Peepaw's here for a good time.

Every above option teeters dangerously close to a total character assassination of Rook, in my view. These are not things Rook, in any of their many forms, would do. And truthfully, these things shouldn't make a companion hardened, they should make a companion leave your party. And that's not what this game is about.

Now, if you're one of those folks who wanted to be able to play evil, that's fine! There are games out there that will suit you better than this one. But at that point we get into the larger argument of what a Dragon Age game even is, and how playing an evil asshole was never actually on the table in the first place. If your script doctoring of the game involves a total rewrite that lets you kill Assan or kick Manfred in the shins, we might be at the juncture where we admit that this game isn't for you, and that's ok! Rook is not the protagonist you're looking for. They're a hero. Inexperienced and out of their depth, but a hero all the same. They will never knowingly make the choice to be cruel, which is why the sacrifices they DO make hit harder.

All this to say, the hardened feature works for Neve and Lucanis. It's fun that our choice of which city to save has consequences, and I empathize with the desire to have more of this mechanic in the game. I just...don't actually think the idea holds water once we dive into the narrative implications of implementing the mechanic on a wider scale. Rook DOES make many choices that affect the companions, but their effects aren't so easily spelled out as "softened or hardened" and tbh the game is all the better for it.

[aihoshiino]

So I actually only just found out that OnK ended and I think I only read up to where S1 of the anime finished, so imagine my horror when I learned that not only did AquaRu happen (technically? I know there was a kiss, at least), but that Aqua dies after coming up with what's probably the stupidest plan I've ever heard of. I'm going off of this from the wiki, btw, so feel free to correct me if I'm missing anything, but I thought this story was going to be a critique on the entertainment industry mixed in with a "catch the killer" plot when I first started, yet it just looks like nobody learned anything by the end of it and the villain's defeat was underwhelming.

Good news! AquRuby did not really happen.

Bad news! AquRuby did not really happen.

Honestly, to this day, I have no idea wtf Akasaka was cooking when it came to the AquRuby stuff... my best guess is that because Oshi no Ko was influenced pretty strongly by Mengo's past works & Aka was trying to emulate some elements of it (to good effect, sometimes!) the AquRuby stuff was inserted to appeal to her and it actually playing out on page was them being like "lalala, playing with our toys" and wasn't ever something the two of them took really seriously.

By coincidence I ended up rambling about this off tumblr the other day, so I'll just grab what I said and slap it here so I'm not just repeating myself;

I'm gonna be so real, I don't think an AquRuby ending was ever something anybody on the series including Mengo ever took all that seriously as a direction the series was going to take. Despite what a lot of people will try and tell you, Ruby and her relationship with Aqua were just never really written remotely in the sort of way you would build up your endgame heroine. Prior to 123 it wasn't really something the series tabled in any meaningful way and even past 123, Ruby's apparent attraction to Aqua is largely just played as shallow brocon gag fodder. It's only when the manga talks about her love for Gorou that it takes her remotely seriously and even then that's dropped like a rock past 150 and never addressed again. The biggest red flag for me though is that the series never actually addresses the concept of incest in the context of Aqua and Ruby's relationship. It is the one big major roadblock to a hypothetical romance between them but the roadblock that is actually, textually floated by the narrative is Gorou and Sarina's past life age gap which is, as Ruby repeatedly asserts, no longer an issue. It's honestly bizarre to see a series have a whole ass subplot about a character falling in love with their blood related twin and pursuing it to the point of forcing a kiss on them and just... never ever address the concept of incest??? It ends up feeling kind of deliberate - like, Akasaka knew that the second the obstacle that is the social taboo of incest came up on-panel it would be the death knell for being able to shiptease AquRuby (and thus, get clicks and attention from hyping it up for better or worse). So we get the... whatever the hell he was cooking that happened on page.

[In response to a comment asserting that Ruby was "absolutely written as the main heroine" as refutation to the above;]

When I say that Ruby was not built up as the main/endgame heroine, I mean moreso in the sense that for over half of the manga, she and Aqua just... don't really have a relationship that is given weight and consequence in the story in comparison to their individual relationships to the other characters. Even before the story was seriously teasing the idea of a romance between them this was always a point of critique in the fandom - hell, if you go back and read comments on it from around 2022 onwards, Ruby's sidelining and the lack of meat to her and Aqua's relationship is always something people have (imo, rightfully) had issue with. And like, sure, maybe Akasaka just wanted her status as the final/true heroine to be a surprise but even if that's what he was going for, there were tons of opportunities in the first 120+ chapters of the manga to properly sow those seeds. I know this is The low hanging fruit to point at and I know we're all aware that Aka deliberately orchestrated this moment to make sure Aqua and Ruby wouldn't discover each other's past identities before he decided it wanted to happen, but it's still characterization that Aka chose to put on the page and informs Aqua's character - Akane and Ruby found a literal dead body and instead of checking in on his sister, Aqua chose to spend time with (and kiss!) Akane. It would've been extremely easy to include Ruby more prominently in moments like chapter 68 when Aqua thinks about living a normal life free of revenge, or when Gorou confronts him in 65 about his 'happy life filled with love'. Even in the anime which makes a point of emphasizing Ruby more in Aqua's 'happy memory' montage from chapter 50's material fails to do this. Or hell, maybe even have it be a point of conflict during the AquAka 'real dating' period, that he ends up prioritizing Ruby more than Akane to a degree that it causes conflict in the relationship and clearly betrays where his real feelings lie. But none of that really happens. Hell, even after 123, Aqua and Ruby still barely interact and all the newfound intensity in that relationship comes primarily from Ruby doing brocon gag bits every time they make eye contact. Even the kiss is difficult to really take seriously because it has absolutely zero impact on Aqua and Ruby both individually and as a duo. It does not affect any change in the series whatsoever to the point where I legit don't even know whether it's been retconned out of continuity or not. That just doesn't feel to me like a 'main heroine' whose feelings and relationship to the main character are being taken seriously by the author. That's why the whole "btw i was reincarnated to be ruby's attack dog them kms" resolution at the end of the series feels so jarring and would have done with or without any AquRuby ship teasing. It was the story trying to cash cheques vis-a-vis the twins' relationship it hadn't bothered to write.

[drspencereidshairtie]

Season Four of The Umbrella Academy was really really something for me because I had disliked lila since the very second they first introduced her. I remember being actively relieved when the show confirmed my suspicions about her, because i had felt a bit bad at first for judging her for no tangible reason.

I never really warmed up to her, in fact i actively hated her by the end of season two (which only went on to get 50x worse in season three with the whole he's our son / just kidding / whoops he's dead / haha im pregnant by the way thing) and then of course season four happened.

I actually almost kinda liked mom!lila. I was like oh, she can be human. She CAN be likeable. Maybe, just maybe, she's not a monster. I liked her new dynamic with Diego, and i enjoyed seeing her being a stressed, caring, normal mom and having a mundane life...for about two seconds. Then the whole 'book club / not book club / let him think I'm CHEATING on him' thing happened, and i was swiftly reminded that there was a reason i didn't like Lila.

Then she gets a power. It was actually a chance for her to be interesting and have character growth beyond just being a mom and wife. They could have used her to show what it's like when marigold interacts with someone who's never before had powers; they could have had some kind of fun training montage, like they did with Klaus and Reginald in season three when he discovered his immortality; and they SHOULD have done something of consequence with it, like having her accidentally hurt someone, or damage something important, idfk but, like, literally fucking anything!!!????!!!!???!!!!??? 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Instead, they just gave her stupid useless eye lasers that she uses about three times, can't control at all, and never comes up again. And it feels like they did it because they knew Lila was a weak character that couldn't stand on her own without the context of the rest of the umbrella academy, so they had to kinda 'even out the playing field' somewhat, even if it defied any and all logic and reason.*

Which, in my case at least, was an unfortunate choice. The one thing I'd actually somewhat liked about Lila was that, despite her personality and history, she was, for all intents and purposes, just an average human. I like seeing regular people in shows about abnormal folk. They give a nice context to the chaos, even if they too are 'chaotic' characters, you know?

Just when I thought she couldn't get worse.........well. I don't think i have to explain what happened. It was so much worse because Five had always been one of my favourite characters and OH MY GOD,,,,,,, HE WOULD NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER DO THAT! HE WOULD NOT DO THAT???? And you know I'm not just saying that in a delusional 'i know him better than the writers do' fan way, because pretty much everyone is in agreement.

He LITERALLY would not fucking do that. ESPECIALLY with Lila, who he's always disliked at best and actively tried to KILL at worst, and especially not now that she's his BROTHER'S WIFE and not to mention the MOTHER OF HIS BROTHER'S CHILDREN????

Anyway, that was my final nail. I no longer just hated Lila and passively wished she hadn't been added to the show, I wanted her dead. I wanted her to be killed off, or have something happen where five returned to the correct timeline but Lila couldn't for some reason, I just wanted her gone and SOON. I think it was probably what killed season four for most people, not just me. I think that if Lila had never existed, or at least hadn't made it to season four, or hadn't gone with five and................

If that hadn't happened, I think it could have been salvageable, even despite the one million and one problems with the season.

TL;DR: I genuinely, truly, deeply believe that the main issue with season four of the umbrella academy was the overarching existence of one 'Lila Pitts.'

(Don't even get me started on her almost jeopardising everything at the last moment in the final episode. I almost broke something in sheer frustration, because OH MY GOD we literally don't have time for this the world is ending infinitely and your life is not more important than the life of a single slug muchless the lives of BILLIONS of people- deep breaths, dustyn. Deep breaths.)

[oodlyenough]

apollo justice: ace attorney thoughts

over the weekend I finished playing AA4 so I wanted to try to put my thoughts in order. much to think about etc

spoilers for the whole game obv, but i haven't played AA5 or AA6 yet so any mention of those are speculation lol

I had heard some pretty mixed reactions to AA4 and I had a lot of reservations going in. It's also probably the AA game I've played that I've been the most spoiled for, which is a shame but probably an unavoidable consequence of waiting for the port while engaging with the fandom. I don't usually like being spoiled but I think knowing the broad strokes of what to expect actually helped here. I can imagine an AU where I blitzed through the first trilogy and onto 4 with no idea of what was coming and being... very upset and disappointed by the direction it took. Having several months to brace for things like Phoenix's disbarment, the 7 year gap, Trucy, etc definitely softened those blows and made me more amenable to them than I would've been otherwise.

Cases

For the most part I thought the puzzle solving was good and the pacing was solid. The puzzles were mostly challenging enough to be satisfying to solve but not so challenging as to be infuriating, and I don't think I needed a walkthrough at all. 4-1 is one of the best tutorial cases in the franchise so far (though I'd give the edge to 3-1) and 4-4 was a really cool finale. The middle two cases tbh I also found fairly charming, and there's usually a least one case in the middle that seems to drag forever, so that was a pleasant surprise. I played Investigations 1 right before this, and I thought both the puzzles and pacing in that game were frankly horrible, so AA4 won a lot of points just with that.

I did think Turnabout Corner and Serenade would be more relevant in the grand scheme of things. The half-spoilers I knew had me expecting a much bigger web of conspriacy than we ended up with -- I expected it to be more than coincidence that Phoenix got hit by a car, more than coincidence that the Borginian egg coccoons are related to poison etc ... like... I fully assumed this was going to tie into the atroquinine plot. But I guess not ... ? Lol

Characters

The new main cast are all very likable, despite my initial reluctance to have a new main cast to begin with. Klavier was an interesting change of pace as prosecutor, in that he wasn't particularly antagonistic outside of the court, nor was he particularly preoccupied with winning, but he was still fun and challenging enough to face off against. Trucy was fun and delightfully bonkers as all assistants should be. Apollo's longsuffering exasperation was hilarious. Ema is the BEST I loved having her as the detective I wish she was there all the time.

I loved Beanix, for the most part. I can see why he rubs some people the wrong way, and tbh I'm glad his last canon outing isn't ... this. But I didn't find him wildly out of character, or at least, when he was feeling "out of character" vs the trilogy it made sense given the intervening events. I also thought it was fun to see him from the outside and see what a galaxybrain 5d chess master he is. I do wish we'd gotten to see more genuine moments of him with Trucy.

Kristoph was fun as a villain, though I have to say fandom led me to believe he was much more of a mastermind puppeteer than he seemed to be in reality. I was expecting a whole decade worth of conspiracies! Instead he fucked up once and struggled to fix it for seven years, lol. I also found the Kristoph/Phoenix relationship a) very fascinating, b) not really what I'd been led to believe by fandom (shocker). I like the canon more though -- I like that instead of being a retread of the Dollie betrayal-from-someone-you-love it was two guys who hate each other being forced to play nice as part of their own schemes.

Criticism

I think it's fairly obvious AA4 was meant to be a soft reboot of the series, to pivot away from the trilogy cast and set up our new heroes in Apollo, Trucy, and I guess Klavier. I think this is probably the entire explanation behind Maya and Edgeworth (and others but lbr those are the big two)'s conspicuous absence... but that doesn't make their absence any less conspicuous. I can squint and forgive neither of them being there when Phoenix is accused of murder, even though I find that insane. I can squint around Maya maybe being off in Kurain during the Enigmar trial, even though I think they could've used a line of dialogue to explain it. But then we started playing past-Phoenix for huge portions of investigation and that started to fall apart for me. Sure, maybe he's pushing his friends away because he's depressed, or maybe he wants to keep Maya out of things because he thinks it's dangerous, or whatever -- you could at least throw in a line or two saying as much. Not mentioning them at all and setting AA4 so closely after AA3, where Phoenix fell through a bridge to save Maya and Edgeworth chartered a private jet, just feels ridiculous.

I also think, at the end of the day, the story here was focused on and pivoting around Phoenix. The core question of the game is "what the hell happened to/is up with Phoenix Wright?" I love Phoenix, so that alone isn't a negative -- except that I think it meant Apollo, Klavier and even Trucy felt underwritten. Trucy and Klavier have such personal stakes in the unfolding events with the Gramaryes and Kristoph, but we only spend a little time and hints on how that might influence Trucy, who mostly falls into the AA weird girl pattern of brushing off major trauma instantly. (Maya got this a lot too in the original trilogy.)

Klavier ... I like Klavier, but they did not do much with him. How did he feel about Kristoph going to jail? He doesn't seem to hold it against Apollo, which is uh, noble, but perhaps not believable. He says he values honesty and truth but do we know why?

Apollo, likable as he was, felt like a passenger in his "own" game, rather than a major character. He doesn't even solve much of the stuff happening in the big overarching mystery -- he is Phoenix's avatar in court, presenting evidence and clues Phoenix left for him. Unlike Trucy and Klavier, who I am pretty sure take a back seat from now on, I guess Apollo still has two more games to try and flesh himself out ... lol but I also know fan reception of those two is not great, so my expectations there are minimal.

Overall

A really solid game that I enjoyed playing, though I can see why it's controversial and not some people's favourite, if they really loved the trilogy. I think it's debatable whether this was the best/only way to continue the series after AA3. And I am excited to read and write a billion 7 year gap fics now.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

I actually thought that Adrien and Gabriel's relationship seemed like it might have been possible to salvage in the early seasons. What do you think?

@tallwriter Starting a new post since this one was getting super long as this is a different topic.

The problem with Gabriel Agreste's character is that they very clearly wanted to write a sympathetic villain - you can tell that from how the show handles his death - but sympathetic villains don't work if you make them cartoonishly evil. You have to handle the situation with nuance and delicacy, especially when one of the main heroes is the villain's son.

Gorizilla is not a perfect episode by any means, but it does showcase how Gabriel should have been written if they wanted him to come across as complex and sympathetic. In that episode, Gabe thinks that Adrien is Chat Noir and, because there's no way to magically force Adrien to reveal himself or confess his secrets, Gabriel has to come up with a situation where Adrien would be forced to transform of his own free will (since that can't be overwritten with a ring or something crazy like that). Which is how we get Adrien hurtling to his death while his father looks on:

Adrien: Always! (jumps out of Gorizilla's hand, and over the side of the building) Yeah-ha! Hawk Moth:(from his lair) No! ... Hawk Moth:(from his lair) If indeed you are Cat Noir, then transform, son. Please. (Adrien continues to fall downward, resolutely remaining as he is) Come on, son! (Ladybug looks down at Adrien, then raises her head, eyes closed.) Ladybug: Cat Noir, help!! Hawk Moth:(from his lair, to Gorizilla) Drop Ladybug!

This is good writing. Yes, Gabe's plan was kind of dumb (you live with Adrien, dude, just bug his room), but if we accept that this was the only way to go about a forced reveal - and that does seem to be the writer's logic - then we see a situation where Gabriel put his son above winning. A situation where he's still very much the villain, but he's not a dastardly, cold-hearted one. He does love his son.

There are actually several of these moments in the first three seasons. Some involve Adrien and many more involve Nathalie. It's why season five's claim that Gabe put beating Ladybug above everything else rings hollow. He never actually did that outside of Evolution (S5E1). He's almost always been loved-ones first when it really counts, a thing that Ladybug uses against him in the final when she tries to crush Emilie. The whole "Ladybug obsession" thing truly feels like something they just made up for that one episode to justify Nathalie "turning sides" aka doing nothing useful beyond maintaining the status quo (hey, they needed someone to keep the senti plot from having consequences and it wasn't like she was doing anything useful anyway!)

The problem is that this "loved ones first" mentality is only used for big dramatic moments, often as a way to keep Gabriel from winning. It's not Gabriel's main characterization even though it needed to be if you want season five's ending to feel even remotely earned. Going into that ending, we should have all thought that Gabe was a messed up dude who truly did love his son. And, if Gorizilla, Style Queen, and Ladybug had all been examples of his standard characterization, then we would have thought that.

But that's not who the writers told us Gabe was.

Instead, his standard characterization paints him as petty, controlling, and manipulative. Which is wild because there was no reason to do that! Gabe could - and should - have been played as stern and removed, but generally loving when he's outside of the mask. In other words, Gabriel Agreste could be well liked while Hawk Moth was hated.

The crazy thing is that this is such a simple change to make. You either removed the episodes where Gabe's awful parenting is the source of the conflict (ex: Bubbler) or you just make a few minor changes to show that he's conflicted about his actions.

For example, take Chat Blanc, the episode that ruined so many elements of this show! In that episode, Gabe is a total bastard. He happily sacrifices his son's happiness to make an akuma in the form of Marinette and then, when Adrien's secret is revealed, does Gabe have any sort of conflict about traumatizing his son? The kind of conflict we'd expect after episodes like Gorizilla? Nope! He straight up delights in showing Adrien Emilie's... corpse? Comatose form? Whatever! Gabe then akumatizes Adrien with a smile on his face.

That gets the writers a solid F for consistent characterization. It's why I highlighted "almost" in red when I mentioned Gabe's motivation. Because in Ephemeral and Chat Blanc, the writing ignores the sympathetic stuff that characterizes the dramatic moments and goes straight for the worst-father-of-the-year, love-to-hate-him, please-let-him-die-now characterization that we get in most episodes.

If you were writing Chat Blanc's Gabriel to fit his intended complex, sympathetic mold, then you would probably drop the breakup plot or you'd have spent all season setting Marinette up as the perfect akuma target, changing the breakup into something that Gabriel felt that he HAD to do instead of opportunistic evilness. You'd also have Gabe drop a line like, "I'm sorry, Adrien. You'll thank me later" before the Chat Blanc akumatization. Or at least don't have him grinning! Do something, ANYTHING to show that Gabe sees using his son like this as a necessary evil and not a fun time! You know, like how he was begging Adrien to transform during Gorizilla? Almost like Gabe had stopped caring about winning and started just wanting his son to live.

Would these changes make Gabe less of a fun cartoon villain? Yes, but that's the point. Cartoon villains are cartoony. They're over the top. They have no nuance. Sympathetic villains don't work with those characteristics.

The normal way to get around this in a cartoon setting is to have secondary antagonists who can be played as cartoonishly evil. And, confusingly, Miraculous has those characters. Chloe, Sabrina, and Lila have been here since season one (Kim could also have stayed a bully and been added to that list, but he's not a teenage girl, so I get why they didn't do that /s.) Felix has been around since seasons three. Nathalie has been an active villain since season two. Any or all of these characters could be the cartoonish, nuance-less villain while Gabriel stays sympathetic.

Instead, they play Gabe however they want to play him in any given episode, making it so that he's impossible to understand from an audience perspective. I personally like the sympathetic take and think that those are the show's best episodes because I like complex villains. It's even how I write Gabe in my stuff because I go for less cartoony takes on canon.

I don't think a redemption was needed, but a sympathetic villain doesn't require one. All that term means is that you can understand the villain and be sympathetic to their plight. Redemption is optional. In fact, the goal is often not redemption, but an understand that, "there but for the grace of the gods go I." I mean, we've all lost loved ones. Wouldn't the power to bring a loved one back tempt you, too?

If they wanted to go for evil, cartoony Gabe, then they needed to drop all of the complexity and go for a Disney villain type character who gets a Disney villain death a la Scar or Mother Gothel. Don't give Gabe the wish. Let him fall to his own hubris by falling into the water of his secret layer and lading as a puddle of ash while a sad Ladybug looks on, having just failed to save him.

If you want to see an excellent look at how cartoon Gabe could have worked, then I highly recommend @zoe-oneesama's Scarlet Lady comic, which is just nearing its end after a multi-year run. I think it's fair to say that Zoe and I largely agree on canon's flaws, she just fixes them by leaning into the cartoon side of things, creating a hilarious story with lots of heart. Canon could have absolutely gone that way too and worked out wonderfully! The issue is not a lack of nuance, it's that they tried to add nuance without ever fully committing to it, making a story that is the worst of both worlds. While a more serious nuanced reboot would be my ideal dream, a reboot that scraps all of Gabe's nuance and just makes him go full evil would be just as satisfying and Zoe proves that.

[twistedtummies2]

Top 10 Appearances of Pete (Disney)

Earlier this month was the 100th anniversary of a very special and somewhat underrated character: Disney’s longest-lasting and most recurring antagonist, Pete. Nowadays, Pete is most well-known as the arch-nemesis of Mickey Mouse and his friends, but this thuggish, bullying scoundrel is actually even older than Mickey is. Pete first appeared in the famous “Alice Comedies” of the silent film era, as a recurring menace. This continued into the even more popular “Oswald the Lucky Rabbit” cartoons that came later. When sound became a thing, and Disney wanted a rival for his new creation, Mickey, it was only natural that Pete would return in short order. He became a sort of lucky talisman of villainy: anytime a classic cartoon needed a baddy, you brought in Pete.

This tradition has continued well into the modern day for Disney. Pete isn’t the most clever villain in the Disney canon, and how truly evil he really is depends on the interpretation in question, but he is certainly the most PERSISTENT antagonist of the whole lot. Just about anytime Mickey, Donald, or Goofy go anywhere, Pete is sure to follow. Given the history of this character, I thought it would be fun to take a look at some of my favorites of his appearances over the years, the same way I have with Mickey as well as various classic Disney Villains from the feature films. (Plus, I do have a bit of a crush on the guy, soooo definitely even more incentive to give him some kudos.) Just like with Mickey, I won’t be counting any of the classic theatrical shorts from way, way back, such as “Steamboat Willie;” this will be for more recent appearances the character has had, ranging from the 1980s into today.

10. Disney’s Dracula, Starring Mickey Mouse.

We’re starting with a comic appearance, though it is a rather special one. A while back, Disney created some graphic novel adaptations of two of the greatest horror stories ever told: “Dracula” and “Frankenstein.” The latter featured various characters from Donald Duck’s world, while the former focused on the mammalian side of the cast, with Mickey as Jonathan Harker, Goofy as Van Helsing, and the Phantom Blot as Dracula himself. The comic manages to actually adapt a big chunk of the novel in a surprisingly faithful fashion, while also making sure nothing is sacred: obviously, Disney couldn’t get away with the darker and more twisted aspects of the tale, so it essentially becomes a parody of the vampire legend. In the graphic novel, Pete plays the role of Renfield: in the original book, Renfield is a madman who devours flies and other insects, and acts as Dracula’s mindwashed servant. In the comic, instead, Renfield - or, rather, “Pete Pegfield” - is still Dracula’s servant, but instead is a crook obsessed with “files,” of various kinds. It’s…a very weird interpretation, which goes for the whole comic. To be honest, the main reason I list this one here is simply because I love this graphic novel so much, more than for Pete’s own sake. They later did a storybook version of the tale, as well, with a lot of the cast returning (albeit some shuffled around into other roles), but that one features neither Pete NOR Renfield, alas.

9. Mickey’s Christmas Carol.

This holiday classic features one of Pete’s more ambiguous roles. Towards the end of this adaptation of the Dickensian tale, Pete appears in a sort of surprise role (I don’t think I’m really giving away spoilers) as the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come, a.k.a. Ghost of Christmas Future. It is he who points Scrooge’s way through the dark path his life is taking, showing him the consequences of his actions and inactions if he doesn’t choose to change his ways. This culminates in arguably the most famous scene from this cartoon, as well as possibly the darkest: Scrooge finds a lonely grave, which not even the the undertakers care enough about to finish dealing with right away, and asks whose it is. The ghost then removes his hood, revealing Pete’s greasy mug: “Why, YOURS, Ebenezer! THE RICHEST MAN IN THE CEMETERY!” With a clap on the back, the Ghost sends Scrooge careening into the pit, and then begins laughing maniacally as the coffin below opens up to reveal the fires of Hell itself, while Scrooge pleads for mercy. JESUS. Pete, we get the point! To be fair, this does end up being the final point in changing Scrooge, but…YIKES.

8. Wizards of Mickey.

Our second comic appearance on the list, and definitely a much more typical one. “Wizards of Mickey” is a series of comics that sort of parodies classic fantasy universes, such as “The Lord of Rings” and “Dungeons & Dragons.” It tales the tale of Mickey, a poor young sorcerer’s apprentice (get it?), who goes on a quest to try and find his lost master and - of course - save the world. Just like in “Disney’s Dracula,” the Phantom Blot is the main villain, here depicted as a dark wizard who wants to conquer the universe. And, also like in “Disney’s Dracula,” Pete is here depicted as the Blot’s second-in-command and chief henchmen. In this series, Pete is Mickey’s greatest rival: the leader of a group of scoundrels called Team Black Phantom. As their name itself may or may not indicate, they’re sort of the Team Rocket of the series, with the Blot as the resident Giovanni. Over and over again, throughout the comics, they pop up to cause trouble for Mickey and his friends, with many a scheme that ends up going awry either because of their own foolery, Mickey’s interfering, or - most commonly - a little bit of both. There’s not much else to say, it’s just a really good comic series, and Pete is one of the most notable antagonists in it. If you want to look at some Disney comics with Pete, this series is a good place to start.

7. A Goofy Movie.

Well, if you’re one of the more “furry-centric” people in my resident kingdoms, this one should have been a no-brainer. I think the scene with Pete at the pool is kind of infamous now amongst that crowd. However, there’s a lot more to appreciate than that. Pete plays a sort of “small but important” role in the film; he’s not the main antagonist, but instead acts as a sort of warped parallel to Goofy himself, with his son, PJ, acting in similar fashion to his best friend, Goofy’s son, Max. The movie seems to take place in the same universe of the series “Goof Troop” (more on that later), wherein Pete is depicted as Goofy’s neighbor and a sort of “frenemy.” He doesn’t seem especially villainous, but he’s not necessarily the nicest guy in the world, either. His perspective is that children need to be controlled, keeping a tight grip on his son, PJ’s, reins, and encouraging Goofy to do the same with Max. The parallel is spelled out pretty easily, when Pete warns Goofy that Max is tricking him. Goofy, disbelieving, tells Pete that no matter what he thinks, he knows that Max loves him. Pete growls back: “MY son RESPECTS me.” I think that says it all, doesn’t it?

6. Goof Troop.

While “A Goofy Movie” is definitely a memorable appearance for Pete, Pete has a much larger role in “Goof Troop,” and frankly he and his family were the best part of this show. While the nominal antagonist of the series, and certainly often up to no good, Pete was once again frequently depicted not so much as a villain, and more just as the coarse and grouchy neighbor of Goofy and his son, Max. We also got to see a lot more of Pete’s family than in the later “Goofy Movie,” as we not only met P.J., but also his smart, sassy wife, Peg, and their hyperactive daughter, Pistol. (As well as their family pet, Chainsaw. Dear God, even the NAMES are hysterical here.) While Goofy and Max were the stars of the show, I was always more excited to see the delightfully dysfunctional Pete family. There was just a lot more comedy and utter MADNESS to the way the Pete family got along, and sometimes didn’t get along. Even though they were better off than the Goofs, and no less loving as a family, the mixture of Pete’s harebrained schemes, Peg’s short temper and endless nagging, P.J.’s somewhat panicky personality, and Pistol’s...um...craziness, meant that they tended to clash a lot more. Honestly, I wish the show had been just about them; most of the best episodes were the ones where they got the majority of the focus. With the recent reboot of “DuckTales,” I keep wondering if other old Disney shows will get revamped in the near future; if they ever decide to make a “Life With Pete” show, or something like that, I’ll be genuinely hyped.

5. Epic Mickey.

In the video game “Epic Mickey,” the good Mouse descends into a world known as the Wasteland, where various forgotten characters, rides, and concepts from the wonderful world of Disney have all been retired. Pete is by no means a forgotten figure, but his presence does still make sense: first of all, I would argue that Pete - despite his perennial appearances - is one of the more underrated Disney bad guys. You don’t hear him referenced or spoken of as often as characters from the films, such as the Evil Queen or Scar. More importantly though, in the Wasteland, it is Oswald the Lucky Rabbit who is chief of all toons, not Mickey…and let’s not forget, Pete was Oswald’s nemesis well before Mickey came into the picture. What makes Pete in “Epic Mickey” fun, however, isn’t just the history involved: it’s how he’s just EVERYWHERE. There is not one Pete, but instead a whole Legion of Petes (that’s literally what they’re called, no joke) who dwell in the Wasteland. There’s “Big Bad Pete,” a sort of “Pete Prime,” who lives and works on Mean Street. Then there’s Small Pete, dressed up in drag like a Little Dutch Girl doll, in the Gremlin Village. Next there’s Petetronic, the head of Tomorrow City, who is based on both Tron AND Sark from the film “TRON.” Finally, there’s Pete Pan, who is literally Pete acting like Peter Pan, with a cyborganic Captain Hook as his nemesis, and a Tinker Bell analogy simply called “Sprite.” (I guess she really likes lemon-lime soda, har har.) In the games, all of these Petes are ultimately seemingly friendly figures, who try to help Mickey out rather than go against him…but in “Epic Mickey II,” in a twist ending, it’s revealed the Legion of Petes have some devious plans of their own. Unfortunately, the series was canceled before we could ever get a follow-up and learn what those schemes were, which is a shame. Still, seeing so many different, funny, and surprisingly amicable Petes all in one place was certainly a lot of fun.

4. The Prince and the Pauper.

After several appearances of Pete being more of just the resident grumpy-gus and not so much a villain, we’re now finally cycling back to a situation where Pete is most DEFINITELY the villain of the story, and a pretty great villain, too! In Disney’s “Prince and the Pauper,” an animated short released in 1990, Mickey Mouse plays both a spoiled Prince and a dreamy Pauper, who end up trading places for a day. The King of the Land is old and feeble, and the Prince himself is so locked up in his own little world, and so detached from the kingdom outside, he doesn’t know how to handle things. As a result, Pete - here the Captain of the Guard, aided by an army of Weasels - is the REAL ruler of the land. Of course, power-by-extension is never enough for these sorts of villains, and Captain Pete plots to TRULY take over upon the King’s demise; when he finds out the Prince and the Pauper have traded places, he plans to use this to his advantage. While Pete’s gluttonous and greedy personality does lead to a lot of humor, and some slapstick shenanigans are had at his expense, this is still probably one of his most evil portrayals out there. He’s a bit smarter and more menacing than many other depictions, while still very much being the Pete we know. I also have to give credit to the voicework here: in the short, Pete is voiced by Arthur Burghardt, who I know best beyond this for playing Venom, of all characters, in the game “Ultimate Spider-Man.” In my opinion, he’s one of the best Venoms out there, and he’s pretty darn great as Pete, too. Maybe there was more in common between Marvel and Disney than we thought, even before the buyout…who can say? Ha Ha. :P

3. House of Mouse.

I debated between this and “Prince and the Pauper” taking third place. I ultimately chose “House of Mouse” just because, much like with Goof Troop versus Goofy Movie, the format of a series gave Pete more opportunities. The series focused on Mickey and his pals running a nightclub, populated by just about every 2D animated Disney character in existence (up to that point). It was made as a vehicle for the “Mickey Mouse Works” cartoons, as well as a few older short subjects, with every episode including a selection of cartoons tied together by a framing device within the main story of the episode. Pete was the main antagonist of the series, not only showing up in multiple cartoons, but also acting as a constant threat to the club in the framing device section. It turns out that Pete owns the land the club rests on, and is constantly trying to find a way to get the club closed down so he can use the land for other purposes. His schemes involved everything from joining forces with the Evil Queen to feed poisoned apples to everyone, to arranging a “Pete Day” at the House of Mouse all for his own vanity, to trying to sabotage a show being put on by “Big Bad Wolf Daddy.” While always up to no good, he was also really, REALLY funny, and, once again, probably one of my favorite parts of the show.

2. Mickey, Donald, and Goofy in The Three Musketeers.

I think most people would agree that this is probably one of the highlights of Pete’s career. While not by any means anybody’s favorite Disney movie, this animated direct-to-video parody of the classic “Three Musketeers” stories is still really fun and enjoyable in its own right. In a way, it’s a lot like “Prince and the Pauper,” but with a longer screentime and a bit more of a tongue-in-cheek tone. In this movie, Pete is once again the Captain of the Guards, this time in charge of protecting Princess Minnie. However, Pete has plans to take over the kingdom, and hires the Beagle Boys to kidnap Minnie as part of his scheme. When Minnie - who knows nothing of Pete’s diabolical plans - orders him to provide her with Musketeers as bodyguards, Pete signs Mickey, Donald, and Goofy into the ranks specifically in the hopes they’ll fail. You can guess how that ends up going for him. Just like with “Prince and the Pauper,” while there’s still a great deal of humor with Pete, he’s depicted as somewhat more clever and more dangerous than usual. He really does feel like he’s right up there in the ranks of some of the more notorious movie baddies I mentioned in the past: someone who is entertaining, but also totally reprehensible. (He also gets the catchiest song in the whole film; no surprise there.) It’s definitely one of the first roles with him I think of when I consider the character.

1. Kingdom Hearts.

Part of the reason KH takes the top is simply because I love Kingdom Hearts. A LOT. But there’s more to it than that. In Kingdom Hearts, Pete is one of the main antagonists of the series: starting with KHII, he shows up in nearly every title of the franchise, to some degree or another. In the universe of KH, it’s revealed that Pete used to be a pretty nice guy; somewhat grouchy, but not evil at all. However, over time, his jealousy and bitterness towards Mickey led to him becoming more and more devious. Eventually, his wily ways led to him being banished to a sort of limbo by Mickey and Minnie; when Maleficent offered him a chance to escape, he swore his loyalty to her, and now serves as her chief lieutenant. I absolutely love the way Pete is depicted in the series, ESPECIALLY with Maleficent as his superior. It’s a duo you would never think of, but works EXTREMELY well: this big, dumb, loutish, showboating thug standing alongside the cold and elegant Mistress of All Evil. What I love about their relationship is that, even though Maleficent is always putting Pete down, and he does get frustrated with her in turn at times, himself, you get the feeling neither can REALLY do without the other. Pete doesn’t have the brains to do much damage on his own, end of the day, and Maleficent…for all her powers, she seems to just need someone to command. She can’t do EVERYTHING on her own, after all. And while other villains have come and gone throughout the series, some siding with Maleficent before leaving her side, Pete has been there nearly every game and remained steadfast in his devotion. On top of that, it’s just a lot of fun seeing all the different ways characters encounter and battle Pete throughout the series. Sort of like Epic Mickey, Pete shows up in all kinds of capacities, with various faces, costumes, and roles to play. And unlike Epic Mickey, where he’s ultimately a fairly peripheral figure, Pete is pretty essential to the stories of these games. End of the day, I see no reason not to name Kingdom Hearts as My Favorite Appearance of Pete: Disney’s longest-lasting villain.

HONORABLE MENTIONS INCLUDE…

DuckTales.

In the original DuckTales series, Pete showed up multiple times in various forms; no surprise there. It was always fun to see him, but I don’t tend to think of this series foremost in my mind when I think of the character. Other villains made more of an impact throughout, in my opinion.

Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.

In this Disney Junior show, primarily aimed at preschoolers, Pete is once again less of a villain and more just of a sort of “grouchy neighbor” character. While he does frequently cause trouble for Mickey and the gang, just as often he’s either on their side or playing the role of an innocent bystander. Easily his most lighthearted appearance.

Mickey’s Once Upon a Christmas.

In this holiday anthology film, Pete appears in one story as Goofy’s neighbor, once again. What heinous treachery does he pull here? HE TELLS MAX THAT SANTA ISN’T REAL! THE DASTARDLY SLIMEBALL!!!

The Wonderful World of Mickey Mouse.

Even in the more modern, zany world of these cartoons, Pete remained his usual self: causing all sorts of trouble for Mickey and the crew in all sorts of forms. By far my favorite cartoon of the bunch was “A Pete Scorned,” where Pete gets depressed when he thinks he’s not a good enough nemesis for Mickey anymore, and becomes jealous of rival arch-foe, Mortimer Mouse. That kind of setup is always hilarious to me. XD