#he sucked and he died and he 100% deserved it

[on-the-clear-blue]

Danny, staring up at Tim, who currently Robin: okay...so this isn't what it looks like.

Tim, giving dead pan glare: so you arnt breaking into Drake Manor?

Danny, shoulders dropping: okay yeah it's totally what it looks like...but not because you think!

Tim, sighing slightly: so you arnt homeless and thought that since Timothy Drake was recently adopted by Bruce Wanye, and both of his parents are dead you can just move in and live here?

Danny, blinking owlishly: I mean, yeah? I mean, not homeless, and I didn't even know that dude got adopted, like good for him, hope that he is safe and shiz, sucks that he parents died and all but not here to squat dude.

Tim, raising a single eyebrow: then why pray tell are you here?

Danny, kicking at the ground a bit: so like...ugh, so I might be um like...a...fudge what's the word...ah! Psychopomp? Like I am a dude that helps like people's ghosts pass and like keeps em happy.

Tim, squinting behind his mask: the only person that died here is Jack Drake and I assure you, his soul would not be happy going to where he deserves to be.

Danny, holding up his hands: wow lot of misplaced aggression there boy wonder...no I ain't here for him, like him and his wife did like...so much tomb raiding they would make the Victorians jelly. I am here cus they stole some dudes shit and he wants it back...like yesterday.

Tim, tilting his head: so you are here to steal an artifact.

Danny, popping the P sound: Yup, something about some guys clay tablet, he liked keeping his hate mail for some reason, said this one was about how he shorted some dudes iron? Or was it copper... my Mesopotamian isn't the best.

Tim, eyes widening, because he knows *exactly* which tablet he is talking about: Oh...yeah no bro, you seem chill but I really can't let you have that so why don't you just like...walk away and I won't be forced to do something kay?

Danny, frowning: Sames dude, up until that .y guy cus like...I *really* wasn't asking...

Tim, sighing as he extends his bo staff: Try and just like, not hold a grude yeah? Don't need a new villain...

Danny, pulling out an ecto gun and turning it on: I don't know man...I feel like we have good banter.

(They fight, Tim is still training so he is a bit sloppy, and Danny isn't shooting to kill, so it's more of them playing cat and mouse throughout Drake Manor, it ends with Danny stealing the tablet but having to leave the ecto gun, which gets broken when he escapes)

Tim, panting as he watches Danny flee: Fuck...is this what B feels after fighting Catwoman?

---

Bruce, rubbing his temples as Tim explains why he was late for training: You tried to apprehend an unknown, with a weapon of an unknown source and power...in the home of your secret identity?

Tim, looking properly chastised: God...yes that happened...he wasn't that bad honestly...was pretty witty.

Bruce developing a twitch in his eye: No.

Tim: No? No what.

Bruce, glaring hard at his adopted son: No falling in love with a villain.

Tim, looking scandalized now: Oh? What is this? Hypocrisy thy name is Bruce Wayne!

Bruce's glare turns into a batglare: Ten laps around the cave and fifty bo staff katas...no villains!

---

Danny becomes Tim's rogue, but not really, most of their battles are more each other showing off their new gear/moves they learned.

Danny also is only using tech that his parents made and he upgraded since he really doesn't want to go ghost in front of *Robin*, who is totally not his crush, and the only reason why he won't is because batman would 100% be on his ass.

Danny, pulling a massive creep stick with a nail driven through it out of seemingly nowhere: The new and approved Creep Stick! This time with nail to add tetnus damage!

Tim, watching as 'The Inventor' escapes once more: I hate seeing him leave but by God do I love watching him go...Damn should have turned on the camera just so I can see it again.

Barbara chiming in: Keep the main line PG Robin.

Batman, through coms: Hn...we shall be having words when we get back to the cave

Tim, sipping a soup that The Occultist made: "So like...why were you even here?

---

When the Titans tower incident occurs, Tim could only watch in awe as the Inventor, not only comes in from the ceiling with a literal metal chair, and then continues to beat up the guy with a bad Robin cosplay.

Danny, panting as he holds up the chair again: Back I say! Back! My blorbo!

Jason, seething as he actually hisses at this random teen that appeared out of nowhere, scurrying away while cradling his broken arm: You shall rue the day! Jason Todd was here bitches!

Tim, staring up at Danny, face a bloody mess and an adoring look in his eyes: omg he stalks me, this is must what the other guys felt when I did it!

They don't really start dating, it's much more Danny breaking into Tim's house and just not leaving.

Tim, watching as his "arch enemy" is sprawled across his couch, bucket of ice cream in one hand, spoon in another, phone balanced between his ear and shoulder, pants and socks tossed haphazardly across the living room and just chilling in his boxers: Now wait a damn minute.

Danny, pausing while looking up from his ice cream (which is actually Tim's, since the boy is rich and buys the good shit), pointing his spoon accusatorily at Tim: Your fucking late Mister! Drag race started half an hour ago and we agreed to watch it together!

Tim, blushing under the Robin mask: Sorry case got good and- wait wait wait, when did we agree to watch drag race together?

Danny, rolling his eyes: when I made breakfast this morning? I even gave you extra strong coffee for your solem swearing that you would be here.

Tim, thinking back to earlier: I just...remember a bright white orb giving me a mug and a plate of food...

Danny, scoffing: this is why I need to drug you to get to sleep more often. Now take off your gear and get over here, they about to choose who shall sashay away!

Tim, nodding slowly: Hope it is that one queen from last episode, that lio sink didn't have any- wait! Ugh you keep distracting me! When did you fucking move in? I don't even know your name!

Danny with a spoon just an inch away from his mouth: Jazz? Yeah I uhh...I gotta call you back...(clicks hang up on his phone) Your joking right? For the shits and gigs?

Tim, shaking his head slowly: No shits, not a single gig my dude, 100% honest.

Danny, who had just arrived this morning since his parents are renovating because Fenton HQ is a glaring OSHA violation, but also who's middle names are "commit to the bit" and "Gaslight GateKeep Girl boss" : Babe we have been dating for like, *months*...d-do ou really not remember?

Tim, existential crisis made manifest: Oh no...I have been mind wiped.

Danny, astounded that worked: Baby I am so sorry...

They "date" for like a week before Danny starts feeling bad that he tricked Tim (who he finally got to see maskless, he had to stop his heart to not show any outward reaction to that, cus like hell he is cute) and wants to come clean but he honestly never had seen Tim more happy nor more healthy.

Danny, sitting across Bruce at the Manor: S-So um...like yeah we um...met at a science convention? My um...my parents were show casing stuff and like...we met there?

Bruce, eyes narrowing because that sounded like a lie: Hn.

Dick, happy that Tim finally felt comfortable to bring his "boyfriend" to dinner: B stop glaring! Your going to scare off Timmy's Bf! God you weren't this bad when I brought over Roy that one time.

Bruce doesn't stop glaring, and it's making Danny even more nervous: Um I uh...need to use the bathroom one sec...

Tim moves to guide him but Alfred waves him to sit down: You really must eat Master Timothy, I did make your favorite today. I shall guide Mister Fenton to the lavatory.

Alfred does indeed lead Danny from the dining room, but the second they are far enough the old butler suddenly has a shotgun in hand, skin suddenly a pale blue and objects around the parlor turning green and floating: While they do try and see the best in others, I do not Phantom, now I must ask you to kindly leave and never contact Master Timothy every again. I shall not let my charge fall for such as the likes of you.

Danny blinking at how he was addressed, a sudden ghostly blue mist escaping his mouth: Oh shit.

They have a ghost fight, all while comically popping in and out of the dining room, making excuses for whyvthe other is gone.

It ends when Tim, finally fed up with why his boyfriend is taking so long opens the door only to see him duking it out with Alfred, fully gone ghost and was loosing.

Such leads to confessions of lies, real feeling and why Alfred has been able to be a spry 60 even though he fought in WWI and it is very much the mid 2010s.

(Danny and Tim do end up together, this time with no lies about a mind wipe, and get Kon and Bart to join their polycule later on)

[justakiro]

WHO THE HELL IS DAVE?

୨୧ — ꒰TWISTED WONDERLAND X READER

୨୧ — ꒰in which the boys who have fell head over heals for you, but you mention another name when having a romantic moment with them. Leading to many misunderstandings

Ft. Ace, malleus, idia

A/N: I most likely was on steroids the whole time I wrote this. Anyways reblogs and likes are appreciated.

THE TWO OF YOU - had just finished classes and planned to bond with each other, for you and him did not have any other plans. Unbeknownst to you, he had already planned this out. He planned to get closer to you using the time and utilize it as an opportunity to ask you out.

Ace

You and ace were chilling inside your dorm, chatting casually and exchanging light jokes with each other. He fidgeted with his hands, patiently waiting just for the right moment to take the hit and ask you out right on the spot.

"You have something in your mind?" you questioned him, the look on his face gave away everything. It was now or never!

"Yeah actually-.. Do..you mind if we could hang out after school? Maybe play some arcade" Ace took a glance at you while he awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck, seeing how you nod your head, he suddenly felt a rush of adrenaline through his veins

"I'd love to Dave"

Well damn.

-Word's couldn't express how his excitement went from 0-100

He thought you were just playing with him till he heard you apologize, saying Dave was a friend you used to hang out with alot.

He brushed it off of course, acting cool and smug at the outside. But in the inside he was basically dying

He didn't want to accept it, but he was beginning to think this Dave person was someone very close to you. So close it made him shudder for it was so unbearable.

You two still went out together after of course.. But the look on his face made it seem like the light had sucked out every single soul in him.

Asked cater to find this Dave person even though there was probably a million of them.

It wasn't long though before his jealousy turned into determination.

Oh so what, this Dave was close to you? Pfft, that was all in the past. HE was gonna be the closest to you now, not him.

Idia

You and idia always hang out with each other after classes but today was different! Since idia himself invited you to his dorm to play games, give each other tips and tricks on the games you both shared a common interest in.

But little did you know this was the final step into finally asking you out! (staying in his dorm more)

See idia wasn't an oblivious person when he started to develop feelings for you.. He was just thinking about how you deserved someone better. But to be honest if he DID see you with someone else he'd immediately feel jealous.

So it was now or never!! He mentally prepared himself for 3 weeks for this moment! Also Ortho was hiding somewhere with a earmic to help Idia steal your heart!

Both of you were just in his room playing games like usual, Your eyes were fixated on the screen though, the only sounds being the keyboard tapping and how focused you are in defeating this boss once and for all.

And when Idia caught a glimpse of the word's 'You Died' pop up, he knew it was go time. Ortho rooted for him... And probably was the only one rooting.

With a final deep breath he tapped your shoulder with his finger that was shaking immensely "I-Uhm, (Name)... Since you're still you know getting wrecked by this boss... W-Wana h-hang out more in my dorm?...." Idia just continued to shrink more and more as he continued to talk, don't blame him though this was his very first time asking anybody out.

With a joyful smile you nodded your head at him "Mm! Sure Dave" you immediately covered your mouth accidentally saying the name of your friend back at earth.

You swear you saw Idias soul start descending to hell with his face flushing in embarrassment while you tried to comfort and apologize to him that it was a mistake.

-Idia you sad sad man...

His mannerisms show how he wanted to dig himself a hole and never return on the surface ever again

3 weeks of mentally preparing himself and he got called another person...

When you left his dorm thinking he needed some time, Idia immediately wailed on the floor using his hoodie to cover himself further

Ortho emerged and comforted him, already trying to track down who this Dave person was.

A tiger is strong but not as strong as Idias mood swings. At first he was depressed over the fact that his crush called him someone else but then got frustrated.

Does this mean Dave frequently plays games with you? Bring him to the ring and Idia will show them how much of a pro gamer he is

He programs a virtual person of Dave inside a game and just spam kills them over and over again to make his frustration subside.

Happy ending though since both of you still played games and you finally defeated the boss.

Malleus

Malleus had always been a gentleman to you the moment his eyes spotted you at the ramshakle, he often showed a softer and sweeter side towards you and nothing like what people imagine him as a cold and mercy less dragon.

He didn't try hiding his feelings either;holding hands, playing with your hair, gifting you things he thought would suit you, all of that kinds of things.

So expect that one day he would abruptly climb your window and ask you if you'd like to be his partner.

Now listen, imagine at 2 in the morning you wake up to the presence of green eyes staring at your soul politely saying to be his partner.

So you took the most reasonable answers, you were either high or still dreaming.

"O-Okay Dave" you accidentally spurted out the name of your closet friend back in your childhood.

Malleus was full on ready to get on one knee until you suddenly said 'Okay Dave?'

Who is this person named Dave? A friend? A significant other? Friends with benefits? Whatever it is Malleus felt something awful inside his stomach

Went to Lilia to ask him for dating advice and told him to 'climb up a window and propose your love to them right away' !

Is this Dave person trying to steal you from him? He doesn't like sharing you know.

You swore a bright flash of thunder strook and hitted a tree nearby making you almost jump outta bed.

You calmed the pissed dragon off though saying it was a mistake, coming up with an excuse that Dave was a made up.

This made Malleus slightly calm down and not strike everything down on his way.

You saved a life of a unfortunate Dave...

But Malleus still got on one knee and proposed to you, but you said you still weren't in the age of marriage yet making Malleus understand your reasoning, he'll just wait patiently for the right moment again.

[fawnsflowerbed]

ugHHHH now i can't stop thinking of morning head on leon. he's so sweet i love domestic leon he deserves his dick sucked everyday. and he would to love to cook breakfast for you when he has the time, his "leon special", scrambled eggs, bacon and a nice little salad maybe or some toast, seasoned the way he knows you like :(

SMALL NSFW MENTION BUT THIS!!!!!

I absolutely adore this 100% it’s so cute but I stand by my thought that he.. he can’t cook. DI can more than others, but I still wouldn’t trust him entirely with a stove alone.

Like I think he can grill, so like 100% you get the bacon or like sausages for the whole English breakfast. The eggs I think he’d learn from you over time so he can cook for you, the last time he tried to fry an egg he forgot what he was really doing with it and was lucky the pan wasn’t ruined.

Like he lets you sit down and teach him how to do the little things the way you like, so that on the days where he’s feeling extra sweet and sappy (and somewhat thinking with his eenis) he can give you that domestic breakfast. He can love on you and nuzzle his stubble against your cheek and eat you out on the countertop like uGJHH!!!!

[f1byjessie]

A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS ━━ LN4.

sometimes the right words are hard to come across, and sometimes everything you need to say can be captured in an image.

( lando norris x photographer!reader )

━━ part nine.

INSTAGRAM.

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, and 714,148 others

tagged: yourusername

mclaren As we get closer and closer to the start of the 2024 season, we thought we’d take the time to introduce new fans to the team that works behind the scenes! Starting us off, we have Y/N L/N, our personal paddock photographer! Y/N has been here with us at McLaren since 2019, and is the genius mind behind many of the photos we’ve posted throughout the years. She’s an important part of our community and helps tremendously in not only capturing our drivers in action, but also in getting the other behind the scenes members of our team the recognition they deserve. We’re glad to have her back here with us in Bahrain, and we can’t wait to see what beautiful concoctions she comes up with this year! 🧡

view all 9,147 comments

user if there is 100 y/n fans, i am one of them. if there is one y/n fan, it is me. if there are no y/n fans, i have died.

user love love LOVE that mclaren takes the time to recognize the hard work of everyone who supports the drivers

↳ user i feel like f1 promotes the racers, team principals, and pit crew so much and forgets about everyone else that makes sure these teams are able to function so seamlessly

user CAN WE GET A MEET THE ADMIN POST TOO??? 👀👀👀

user i bumped into y/n back in silverstone 2021, like literally bumped into her, and she was so sweet!!

user she’s my photography inspo 🤩

user her dedication to the mclaren team is so apparent when you think about the fact that she DOESN’T get the same recognition as the drivers, but she has chosen to work for them for what will be 6 years as of this season. she could have easily move to a different formula 1 team or even another sport entirely, but she still comes back and that’s a dedicated artist

↳ user the fact that she did a little stint over at manchester city fc and STILL chose to come back to mclaren even tho i imagine f1 has a much harsher and stricter schedule with the intercontinental travel than football does

user this is who we have to thank for all those beautiful shots of lando??? cuz if so, bless her omg 🙏🙏🙏

user in this household we appreciate the crew that works tirelessly to keep us entertained

user so tired of seeing ppl disregard her skill as a photographer just bc of who she’s dating

↳ user OMG SAME

yourusername glad to be here, can’t wait to travel the world with these amazing people 🧡

INSTAGRAM.

liked by oscarpiastri, mclaren, and 214,051 others

tagged: mclaren

yourusername locked in and ready 😎

view all 1,514 comments

oscarpiastri so glad you’ve gotten over your temporary obsession with blue 😁

↳ yourusername so glad you haven’t lost your ability to get on my last nerve 😁

↳ oscarpiastri so glad you’re still insufferable even on your best days 😁

↳ yourusername now that’s a comeback i can be proud of 🥹

user MISSED THESE LADS OH MY DAYS

user ONE DAY UNTIL TESTING GUYS

user oscar looking fine asf these days 😩 that winter break treated him well

mclaren The boys are back in town!

↳ yourusername dare i say my milkshake brought them to the yard?

↳ mclaren It certainly called us 😍

↳ yourusername you flatter me mclaren admin 😌

↳ mclaren Only the best for our best 😘

user that’s some pretty intense eye contact from lando in the last image…

↳ user he ain’t even looking at the camera

↳ user nah bruv is def looking at y/n 👀👀

↳ user I NEED THEM TO GET OVER WHATEVER HAPPENED AND GO BACK TO BEING FRIENDS CUZ I MISS THE BANTER IN THE COMMENTS

↳ user i think we should probably respect their privacy and understand that something happened (presumably in the off season) that we weren’t privy to. so long as they can both maintain professionalism around one another, they don’t have to do or “get over” anything. does it suck to see two very close friends no longer get along in the way they used to? absolutely. but we don’t know what happened or if anything even did happen. in the event that something did, we don’t know who’s involved or who, if anyone, is at fault. they’re both justified in choosing to end a friendship due to a falling out, or even if they just grew distant. but even as i say all of this, it’s still speculation.

↳ user we don’t actually know if they aren’t friends any longer or if they’ve just moved their friendship off of online platforms. it should be noted that y/n is very publicly dating someone, and idk about you, but i know firsthand how delusional fans can be. her bf’s fans could easily attack her over banter with another man, and lando’s fans could just as easily start reading into that same banter which runs the very real possibility of putting all three of them in an awkward situation where y/n is being shipped with a man that ISN’T her bf.

↳ user what about the banter she has with the mclaren admin? 🤔

↳ user context is super important here. the flirting between y/n and the mclaren admin is very obviously fake. it has been from the beginning, and when ppl “ship” the two of them together it’s for the bit and to play along with their fake bromance. lando and y/n have both been legitimately shipped together since they both started working with mclaren, which changes the undertone of the shipping comments bc ppl often genuinely misconstrue their banter as REAL flirting.

user why do comment sections related to y/n always turn into debate sessions

↳ user REAL like ain’t no way i’m reading all that

user oscar’s hair sticking up in every picture is my roman empire

user I’VE BEEN MISSING THE ORANGE I’M SO GLAD IT’S BACK 🧡🧡🧡

user wait i didn’t even realize until now that this is the first post in like a month that’s actually had public comments turned on

↳ user probably bc her bf’s loser fans have finally stopped harassing her

jackgrealish must be nice having all that sun 😒

↳ yourusername it really is, bet you’re jealous

Testing goes fine, until it doesn’t.

“A drain cover?” Lando’s voice echoes across the garage. “Another fucking drain cover?”

You purse your lips.

Yesterday, he’d been upset on Oscar’s behalf when they’d cancelled the remainder of the morning session after only a couple hours to solve the problem of the track’s dislodged pieces. He’d complained and cussed out the incompetence, and then reassured Oscar that things would be better for the third day.

But the third day is here now, and he’s even more upset now being told to pit after a measly thirty minutes for the same issue.

“This is the second fucking time━” he cuts himself off with an angry huff and runs his hands roughly through the curls of his hair, letting his fingers catch on the tangles and yanking through them in his frustration. Sweat glistens on his furrowed brow. His cheeks are still flushed from the heat of the car.

It’s the most emotion you’ve seen from him since you’ve come back.

The time you’ve already spent in Bahrain has been stilted at best. Lando continues to stick with his attempts at avoiding you, but it’s harder to do so here when your hotel rooms are on the same floor and you’re limited to the confines of the garage for most of the day. Even when he isn’t in the car, there’s not a lot to do wandering around the paddock and even if there was they’ve encouraged him to stay where he can easily be reached.

You’re trying not to be smug about it, but every time you glance over your shoulder and catch him watching you━ catch him quickly looking away when your eyes meet and he realizes he’s been caught━ you feel pleased.

If there’s one thing you’ve learned about Lando, it’s that he’s always got a limit.

If you wait long enough, stand your ground and prove that you really have no intentions whatsoever of giving in and breaking the ice between the two of you, eventually he’ll cave. When he realizes he won’t get what he wants, that he’ll have to actually put in the effort to repair what he’s broken rather than having it magically fix itself, he’ll have no other choice but to do so.

“They might not cancel the session,” Oscar chimes in, attempting to placate his aggravated teammate. “Since they already had to yesterday, I doubt they’ll do it again today.”

Unfortunately, that doesn’t actually calm Lando down at all. If anything, it just reminds him again of the fact that this is the second time this same complication has happened which has him huffing angrily again and running his hands through his tangled curls even rougher.

You wince at that.

Andrea, McLaren’s team principal, steps forward. “Take a breath,” he orders, resting a heavy hand on Lando’s shoulder. “Go walk a lap around the garage or something, whatever, but I need you to calm down.”

You’re prepared for that to be the end of it, but then Andrea looks over and catches your eye. “Y/N,” he says, nodding his head towards Lando. “You go with him. Keep him out of trouble.”

Well.

You like to think you do a much better job at keeping your emotions off of your face than Lando, which isn’t hard when his features scrunch up into a pained scowl at Andrea’s words, but you can feel the pinch of your own eyebrows furrowing and the smile you send towards the team principal probably looks more like a grimace if Oscar pursed lips in your peripherals is anything to go by.

Lando storms out and you follow reluctantly after him.

He can’t really go very far, not if he wants to be within a reasonable distance when━ if━ they call him back to continue the morning testing session. So he paces back and forth and back and forth just outside the garage’s exit out into the paddock.

Your phone tells you that ten minutes pass like this. It’s the longest you’ve been alone with him in a while and his distraction lets you focus on the finer details that you’ve missed when he’s going out of his way to avoid you.

There are deep, dark, bruise-like circles that hang heavily beneath his eyes. His skin is sun-kissed and tanned from his time out catching rays during his travels, but there’s a pale pallor beneath the added color that makes him look sick. Despite his current anger and the tension coiled in his muscles just waiting to lash out and strike, his shoulders seem to droop beneath the invisible weight of whatever he’s carrying with him.

He looks small.

Lando’s always been on the shorter side, but he’s never before looked small. Not like this. Never like this.

The longer you watch, the more the back and forth pacing starts to transform into the anxious stride of a cornered animal.

You aren’t arrogant enough to assume he’s like this because of you entirely, but it does occur to you that maybe he’s having just as rough of a time as you are with the newfound distance between yourselves.

You watch him silently, for a little while longer, observing the way his stride hitches every few steps and he just barely manages to stop himself from stumbling over his own feet. He’s still running his hands through his hair. By the seventh time he practically claws his fingers through his curls you heave a sigh.

“Quit that,” you snap.

“Quit what?” He fires back with just as much bite.

You roll your eyes. “You’re gonna rip your hair out if you keep pulling on it like that.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” he stops in his tracks and turns on his heel to face you with a sneer. His words drip with sarcasm. “I forgot you must be used to Grealish now, right? And I bet he’s got at least a ten-step hair care routine. I wonder, does he use unicorn sweat and essence of rainbow to keep it that smooth and bright? There’s no other possible way!”

“You’re being an asshole, Lando.”

“My sincerest apologies,” he says. “How could I ever think Grealish would use unicorn sweat of all things? He uses pixies tears, my mistake.”

You’re not sure how a few words managed to turn into this━ you’d just wanted him to stop pulling at his hair. It looked painful and he’s always been a bit tender headed. Now, instead, you can feel the anger bubbling up inside you and it seems like Lando’s frustrations about the testing delay, and your friendship with Jack apparently, have made things worse.

Like throwing gasoline onto a flame.

You scowl, “Seriously. You’re being a fucking prick.”

He throws his arms up into the air, “Why not just run off to Grealish then? Since he seems to be your new best friend and you tell him everything.”

If your life were a movie, this is the moment in time when the stars would align and fate would force everything to position itself perfect in place. Like the pieces of a puzzle, it would all work out and you’d calmly explain to Lando what happened back in January with Garrett and Manchester City, and he’d understand immediately and apologize, and you’d hug it out and then both return to the garage just in time for them to announce the testing session would re-commence.

But your life isn’t a movie, and reality feels significantly different to the scripted perfection of fiction.

The precarious security of the perch you’ve settled yourself upon comes crashing down, and the tentative balance you’ve managed to maintain since the start of February when you were back in papaya again shatters with it. Something inside you snaps. The dam has burst and everything held back comes rushing to the front like a torrential wave.

“At least he was there for me when some prick blackmailed me into a relationship at the threat of my livelihood,” you snarl.

Lando pauses for a moment. He makes a couple different faces before settling on a mix between pissed off and confused, and his arms cross over his chest. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I didn’t want to be in a relationship with Garrett Ward, Lando!” You exclaim. “He threatened that if I didn’t pretend to be his girlfriend, he’d fake some misconduct rumor and ruin my career and I was too afraid to say no because this is all I have!”

This isn’t how you’d wanted it all to go down. You’d always imagined you’d get the satisfaction of an apology, and that Lando would get drunk on cheap wine with you like old times, and you’d explain what all happened with the confidence of being a little tipsy and you wouldn’t feel ashamed because Lando’s your best friend and he’d reassure you that you did what you had to, and then you’d listen to him shit talk Garrett for the rest of the night. In the morning, he’d have some idea of how to fix it all without ruining your career, and then you’d be able to put it all behind you and go back to how things were before the winter off-season ever started.

This is far from that, but there’s a sense of relief that comes nonetheless from getting it all off your chest to Lando━ to the person you’ve wanted to talk to from the very beginning

You feel tears burning your eyes, blurring your vision. “I can barely pay my rent as is, and I’m only actually living there for a few dumb months out of the year anyway. Do you know how much worse it would be if I got kicked from McLaren too? Nobody else in the country would hire me if he followed through with what he was threatening.”

“Well,” Lando shrugs his shoulders, looking properly chastised. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I fucking tried, you muppet!” You throw your arms up in exasperation and then wipe at your eyes in frustration when the tears start to roll down your cheeks. “I called you every day for a week and you ignored me! I sent you text after text after fucking text━” your voice breaks, “━and you didn’t even read them! Did you know I locked myself in the bathroom and cried every single day I had to work there?”

You glare at him.

“The only thing that made it better was Jack fucking Grealish coming into my office and telling me I could at least go to him if I ever needed anything,” you snap. “So fuck off with this whole holier than thou bullshit. You left me, and Jack took your place because I was drowning!”

“Y/N…”

Crying hadn’t been a part of your plan, but the tears won’t stop now that they’re going. It’s embarrassing. You’re already worried about just how many people heard you shouting, and now you’re even more worried about someone coming back to look for you both and finding you sobbing your eyes out.

“I’m sorry━”

Lando’s arms wrap around you, warm and strong and sure.

━━ tags: @maih23 @urfavnoirette @leclercsluv @f1luvur @formulaal @a-disturbing-self-reflection @starlightpierre @chezmardybum @marshmummy @405rry @sideboobrry11 @d3kstar @mcmuppet @happylittlereader @casperlikej @5starl1ght @bellezaycafe @whentheautumnleavesfall @mess-is-my-aesthetic @ssprayberrythings @landosgirlxoxo @lifelessfan @81ja @wcnorris @a-disturbing-self-reflection (CLOSED).

━━ a/n: and there we have it folks. lando is finally back in the picture! this part was a lot of fun to write, because i've been waiting for this moment since the initial fallout in the beginning. on that note, i finished getting it all whipped up this morning while watching the qualis, so if there are any mistakes that i haven't caught that's why. i was a bit distracted, so please pretend they aren't there haha!

[bungoustraybangs]

The level of disappointment I have for BNHA ending is unmatched with any type of series I invested in.

The whole reason this story didn’t feel like a carbon copy typical shounen manga was because of the league.

They felt humanized and their trauma was so complex just for them to be thrown away in favor of the heroes learning their little lessons.

These basic ass tropes these main characters carried throughout the series felt so recycled.

The bootlicking was tangible, I mean shit Endeavor got a shot at redemption and he got that opportunity because of his privilege.

It really reflected a lot about society in general.

The worst part is nothing fucking changed, but people eat it up because they fell for characters we’ve seen a 100 times before.

It just sucks, there could’ve been so much more. It really shows even if fiction there’s no solution for the issues each of the villains represented.

I honestly feel if I blindly followed the manga in favor of the heroes and their “struggles” to become super happy plus ultra then maybe I wouldn’t feel so bitter.

But I do, I can’t help that I do. Because there was a swing with so much force behind it just to miss.

And man did it fucking miss.

Perhaps twice’s ending should’ve been a good indicator where the series was headed. But I held onto to hope.

I mean right before Shigaraki died he was told his whole life was orchestrated by afo and that is so fucking tragic.

And my god Toga sacrificed herself, and Dabi is barely even alive. I think he was “spared” so Endeavor could have more time to apologize for his mistakes.

It’s just so fucked, I don’t know how else to put it, I’m disappointed.

The league deserved better.

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

can u pls tell the people your most traumatising sirius ships

i was going through a mental list of all the traumatizing sirius ships and that's just all of them i fear, so here's a handful of my current favs <3

sirius x walburga - she fucked him over. then, she fucked him ! she's possessive and overbearing and controlling, won't let him talk to any girls because it makes her sickk. she'll say it's because they aren't good enough for him and then go on to describe herself when talking about his wife. #1 most toxic, traumatizing relationship ever haunted him till the day he died.

sirius x james - codependent homoerotic best friendships have the most insane jealousy problems ever and james potter is NOT used to sharing, tails behind sirius 24/7 and he's sirius' entire concept of love soo. yeah. also i read pioneers and oh my god. also it just ruined his life like imagine getting dick SO GOOD you break out of prison and die for it.

(war time) sirius x peter - peter is playing this man like a fiddleee omg. ex situationship ended in marriage (hint: not with him), ex boyfriend is a nazi (according to him) and everyone he loves is dying PLUS he's being manipulated by the guy he settled for ??? peter is just 24/7 implying that sirius is Bad and sirius is like ykw yeah i suck and should prbly die

sirius x barty jr - is it even a traumatizing sirius ship post without a grimkiller mention? no, no it isn't. barty is everything and nothing to sirius he is good and bad and everything in between. barty's pathetic and weird and disgusting and sirius is like eww... wait hot. barty brings up his worst fears and humiliates him and hurts him and withholds food and information from him and makes him get off on it and sirius thinks I Deserve This.

sirius x barty SR - no because it's perfect. bcsr is kinder than walburga and orion but not so nice that sirius feels (completely) undeserving of it. he's constantly favoured over bcjr and praised and valued and loved and it's amazing for bcsr because he can literally make sirius do anything he wants in a moment. + sirius is being so used to favoured over bcjr (because he's competing as a son) that when bcsr goes to his wife instead of him (because he's now a competing with her too) sirius is tearing his hair out screaming crying throwing up

sirius x frank gallagher - this is a stand in for all the shitty guys sirius dated in and after hogwarts that were older, drunker, meaner than orion and with that also had very demeaning, d/s kinks with no aftercare, had a wife and kids sirius' age, talked about how much he'd like to screw other women in front of sirius, constantly criticized him. no one knows why sirius is dating him when all of his hot rich nice friends who would kill themselves for him are all pining over him.

sirius x minerva - completely totally one sided however it does take over his life for most of his time at hogwarts and he's going insane trying to get her approval and he's not even sure if it's just his mommy issues or a crush or what. doesn't study for anything but he'll stay up days to ace transfiguration so his hot older teacher will maybe smile at him and tell him he did a good job

sirius x regulus - guilt guilt guilt he 100% believes he's the one who brought regulus down with his lust and sin (it was all regulus' plan but shh he needed dick) and the self hatred and shame and sex repulsion and guilt and "im not just like them i'm worse"-ness is 📈📈

honorable mentions: sirius x pandora, sirius x evan, sirius x evan x barty, sirius x marlene, sirius x james x bellatrix

[zekeyboy]

okay. here it is.

why john kramer (and lawrence gordon) are kind of classist

disclaimer: this contains some canon-based assumptions? nothing crazy. just know some of my points are “most likely this happened because this.”

this also contains bits from scripts. i really like gordon as a character i just like to pick apart guys with my brain

starting off strong with the fact that. most likely. lawrence gordon and john kramer were born into well-off families. that’s not to say they had the most perfect, 100% best lives, but i really doubt they struggled financially in a severe way. they both went to college for respectable degrees, and got respectable jobs where they feel that they are helping out society due to the goodwill of their own heart. the important thing to note is that they have most likely not experienced severe poverty or homelessness or living from check to check.

lawrence is very clearly over it when adam talks about how he does what he does because he needs to eat - and it’s no coincidence that adam was put opposite to lawrence in the game, because it was always lawrence’s game, and adam is someone that - despite the connection they gain - lawrence could feasibly bring himself to shoot and kill. he’s a ‘bottom feeder.’ he has no respectable job, he does shit they don’t approve of to survive. he’s the lowest rung of society and therefore it’s not a huge loss if he dies in that bathroom. not sure if that’s cohesive at all but it’s there in my mind.

in short: both lawrence and john (john’s the one who put him in lawrence’s game, after all) have very little respect for adam and his life solely because he’s on what they deem the bottom level of society. in poverty, committing illegal acts, and - ruining the lives of these better men.

when lawrence is crying near the end of the movie, he laments about having his “whole life in order” and wondering where it went wrong. he doesn’t come to the conclusion that the fact that he cheated on his wife is partially what made it all go south. he won’t even admit to it. and, yes, while the question of if he did actually physically cheat is up for debate - let’s be honest. that marriage was dying and it wasn’t allison’s fault.

if anything, at the very least, in that moment - lawrence feels that it’s adam and tapp’s fault for bringing all his dirty laundry to the top. it’s easy for him to pin the blame on them.

the most important piece of my argument is this part of the saw vii script, though. because it really hammers it in how the philosophy works. this is how john completely recruits lawrence.

the “underbelly of society has been indulged. they’ve begun to control the lives of the strong.”

the underbelly of society: addicts, sex workers. homeless people. impoverished people. a majority of the people who get trapped.

while you can come to me and say “john kramer traps rich guys too!” he does. that is true. but he also has a deleted trap where a homeless guy has to sift through shards of glass. trapped for being homeless is the most insensible thing i have heard of. he sucks.

the strong: important, respectable rich men like john and lawrence.

and that sentiment gets lawrence on board. he hears that and hes like “yeah these people deserve to be horrifically maimed.”

which is also what these tags said on my last post -

thank you to @a-dotrivenitupontop

the majority of the people behind john’s cause are these rich white men. amanda is an outlier - mostly because she’s more like a trophy for john, in a way. that’s a whole other post though

i didnt organize my thoughts here at all. idk if this is coherent. i couldn’t tell you. i just woke up. thanks guys

[loudclan-clangen]

(I thought of something funny)

Whenever Owlstar comes back to camp from solo walks, there's just this giant banner at the entrance reading "Welcome Back, Cheater."

Slitsplash swears they didn't put it up, but appreciates whoever did it.

Meanwhile, Fiercestripe is smirking in the background. (She did it)

They’re throwing him a party!

(˃̣̣̥▽˂̣̣̥) These asks all flow together so well I genuinely cannot tell if they are multiple people or just one person who is SO PISSED. Made my night to see these all come in at about 2am. If Owlstar has 100 haters im one of them, if Owlstar has 1 hater it's me, if Owlstar has no haters im dead.

I do! It was actually incredibly comical from my perspective because Eklutna showed up, did fuck all for 5 moons, got pregnant, then promptly died giving birth, to which i went "aw, that sucks" clicked on her kits, and SAW THAT THIER DAD WAS THE LEADER, SOMETHING THAT I DID NOT KNOW COULD HAPPEN. Eklutna didn't even have any romantic like for him, to my recollection, and Owlstar had like maybe a single tick for her? It was really just lucky rng I guess. Owl and Silt actually didn't break up in the game at all, in my original draft for the story, when i was just writing notes as i played, Siltsplash was a lot more... okay with it? Like they were pissed but their personality was a lot more demure so they didn't act on anything really. The exact quote from the draft was: "I won’t lie to you. I’m angry. Starclan, I’m more than angry, I’m furious. I have half the mind to tell you to leave and never come back.” They paused, seeing Owlstar deflate and taking some slight, bitter satisfaction in it before continuing, “But that wouldn’t be fair to those kits. They didn’t ask to be born, much less to you. They deserve to have a family, or as much of it as they are able to have, and starclan help me we’re in this together." It certainly fit with what I knew about them then, but given my ability to look forward and see future events, I decided that a break up made more sense.

Don't be sorry! I am not currently in artfight, I'm considering it but I wouldn't be able to be very active due to school, and I don't want to take another break from this blog so soon after my last, so it's not very high up on my list of priorities. I'm kinda casually working on refs for the more popular characters, so there's a chance I'll get those done and join a team, especially if it's something you guys want me to do. If that happens I'll be sure to let you guys know! I am now in art fight! I gave into peer pressure again. (In a good way).

I don't think even Silt knew. Siltsplash was OUT of it after their conversation with Owlstar, (see: the Eklutna hallucination), and they probably didn't even know where they were headed until they reached the nursery. But after setting eyes on the kits, Siltslpash knew that there was only one option. Yes, they "took the kids in the divorce" but truly they weren't thinking about revenge. They just saw kids who needed something that they could provide.

In terms of writing, though, since I have hundreds of moons of foresight, it was a total bait and switch. I needed to make sure that people had a reason to come back after the break and any comic with kittens in it usually gets a lot of attention, so it was a "marketing" decision to split up the moon the way that I did, in order to make sure that there wasn't too bad of a fall off in interaction for the blog.

In game Eklutna had an affair with Owlstar, died giving birth, and the "died giving birth" event overwrote the "reveal affair" event so technically, in game Owlstar didn't reveal the affair... ever? (Though I had written in my notes that he told Siltsplash who took them as their own). Story wise, Owlstar hadn't planned to tell anyone until the kits started asking about who their father was. Then he would tell them, and would probably reveal it to the clan when they earned their names and were able to become deputy. But, when Eklutna died all that went out the window. For all his faults, Owlstar is not a bad dad, and he would never leave his kits orphaned, even if it would get him in a lot of trouble to do so. He really does care for them, and he feels terrible about how much he's screwed up their lives so far.

He did bad, deitycrows, he did bad. He cheated on his mate and then his affair partner died in childbirth so he's not very popular rn, I've got to be honest.

I don't think it helps at all but, Owlstar did really genuinely like Eklutna! Now, was that because she never opposed him on anything and flattered him with adoring compliments at every opportunity? Possibly. But the "Starclan said" thing was honestly just more of an excuse for him. He woulda had an affair anyway, he just wouldn't have intentionally had kits with her.

:) Eklutna liked... the power that Owlstar held. She liked that he was chosen by Starclan to lead the clan, she liked that his kits are meant to inherit the position of leadership, and she liked that as the mother of his kits she would have a lot of control over both him and the leader after him. As far as his personality... he's kinda a clown but she could live with that.

To be frank: The order of inheritance is ABSOLUTELY FUCKED. If Eklutna had lived, it would be easy. She would take over as deputy until one of the kits was old enough to hold the position. But, since she's dead and Owlstar's only heirs are literal infants, as their adoptive parent Siltsplash is still the deputy for now. What happens when the kits reach adulthood is kinda up for debate. As Owlstar's closest descendant, Songkit should be deputy upon earning his warrior name, BUT Siltsplash is very much against that plan, and the kits might not want to go against their most attentive parent. So the very unhelpful answer is: We have to wait and see what the characters decide.

Thank you so much! I love to hear from first time viewers and see what you guys think of the characters! I'm glad that the dialogue worked so well and Eklutna definitely has Sol vibes! You look at both of them and go "in what world would this plan work the way you wanted it to???"

[siriusblackdevotee]

I just saw a fanart of Sirius and Snape. What was that? Why was that hot? How the fuck was that hot??? TELL ME ABOUT THEM! I'M NOT GETTING THEM OUT OF MY BRAIN. What is the deal here??!?!?!?

Is the fanart from intotheswollenriver...bc yeah, god they are hot.

It's hot because they absolutely hate each other but they would also wholeheartedly trust each other when it comes to achieving their number one goal, which is protecting Harry. Like their vibes are enemies, so a divorced couple with phenomenal co parenting skills?? Best friend of Lily, best friend of James??

Besides that, I'm pretty sure they have a lot of parellels. Which is why I reallyy love shipping them.

Sirius hated his home life but he was forced to live back there again though it was for a short while, Severus also lived back in his childhood home, though he spent most of his time Hogwarts for his career.

Sirius and Severus had a huge part in the deaths of the Potters, and therefore felt responsible/guilty. "I as good as killed them." (Can't remember the quote) and Severus's...well you know.

Other DEs suspecting Severus to be a traitor and other Order allies actually convicting Sirius as the traitor?? Also the literal ex death eater believes Sirius was a DE and the wrongfully convicted one doesn't even know Severus had a dark mark?? Like??

There's more but I can't remember lol.

Snupin is sad angst but snirius is like...angry angst. Snupin is recovering from their teenage bs and the war but snirius is making it worse. Like... reverting? Relapsing??

Because Sirius says shit like he wasn't proud of his teenage treatment towards Severus, and drops quotes like oh the world isn't black and white harry or whatever and then turns around and says Severus deserved the Prank happening (although I think this happened first) and speaks to Severus like he's the worst scum on earth, even before he finds out Severus was a DE. Like despite how impulsive he is, Sirius does understand, he has logic and everything but literally all of that goes out the window the moment he talks to Severus?? Like, heed your own words bro, why can't you??

Severus gets to be an asshole to Sirius for obv reasons, PTSD and all. I forgive him.

Anyways, they literally get under each other's skin like no other. The only marauders era characters to be written this way. Like it's been more than a decade since their childhood "feud" (/sarc) and they still revert back to their teenage self whenever they fight. It's so fascinating because we know Severus is the rationally composed one. Even Sirius has his moments.

And yet, even though every one of their canon interactions were bitter and heated, Severus handles the unconscious body of Sirius carefully, he doesn't knock his head around on purpose (unlike Sirius with Severus's body) and Severus genuinely did not want Sirius to die. Before they even properly had a conversation, Severus seems to have uh moved on? He was ready to forget the whole "getting back" at Sirius thing, he's over it but all that past resentment, anger and bitterness comes back immediately the moment he talks to Sirius. Which, I don't blame him for. Human response honestly.

At his core, he understands that no matter how horrible Sirius was to him, this is Lily's friend, this is someone Harry cares about. So kind of like Harry to Draco, this guy is a piece of shit but he doesn't deserve death

And this is somewhat similar to Sirius's oh Snape? Hated that Slytherin guy, sucking up to all those horrible slytherins, I wouldn't mind if he died back then lol... what do you mean he was a death eater? Are you sure?

Hence, they are enemies and lovers. I don't think they'll ever move past the enemy phase. So they are both. Their conversations are 100% full of witty quick comebacks and sarcasm. They've lived through experiences literally no one else shares. Like who else would know what it's like to unintentionally play a key part in orchestrating the Potter's death??

Even besides that, how they're written too. Severus is poor, working class, bullied, ugly, greasy hair, goes from the lowest of the barrel and works his way up, rational, and introverted, inherits almost nothing valuable from his pureblood mother. Sirius is rich, highest of the highest elite, peaked in highschool, handsome, gorgeous hair, falls from disgrace—a young man with a huge inheritance to an escaped convict, irrational and extroverted, inherits like?? Everything?? From his family???

Also, there's Severus who hates his name from his father because abusive guy and Sirius who hated what his family represented. Hmm, they're not exactly the same but the vibes....

Like it's so...ugh compelling?? It SPEAKS to me.

[rookieoneil]

Controversial rant 🧍🏽‍♀️

Spoilers (7x03) (not John Nolan friendly)

JOHN NOLAN

Nolan is fucking reckless. He’s doing exactly what Tim did last season. Going after someone for a personal agenda. He’s supposed to be a teacher, how is Celina expected to make it as a cop when her teacher A isn’t teaching, and B is constantly making the job personal (something Celina, Angela, and Lucy got in trouble for) I wish for ONCE they treat him like they treat everyone else.

This episode alone let’s look at this. Seth and Miles got in trouble for saving a civilian successfully (as they should) and Nolan- instead of saving a civilian (that’s protocol) he went after a suspect and made a deal with said suspect (who got away) because it was in HIS best interest.

The man ended up losing over two pints of blood! Which could have been a lot less than it could have been. Idk if he died (probably not) but still this is crazy.

Not the point. My point is he didn’t get in trouble at all.

I know the difference being they are rookies and John’s not but still. John is constantly getting away with shit that anyone else would have been prosecuted for.

Not to mention him talking to a suspect and jeopardizing the case of two teenagers who lost their lives because it benefited him. Like how is any of what he did allowed?!? How is able to continue a personal investigation with consequences??? Tim got “demoted” (fired?) from metro because of his personal investigation. How is this different? Because John let a dangerous guy get away, and almost let someone else die.

“He was doing it for his wife” idc. Let other people deal with this. Not him. He’s too close to this,

As a husband, he’s protective and good for him, as a cop he’s reckless and will get someone killed

Ughhh I just hate John Nolan with everything I am. Never make me like him.

CHENFORD

Despite popular belief, I think that Rachel is here to get Chenford back together. I don’t think she’s here for alternative reasons.

Also I think that this friendship/ team work that they are creating will make their relationship in the future be 10x better. They need this time to reconnect let’s not get them back together for a good minute because they BOTH need to grow.

Lucy

Baby girl is finally getting a friend again. I feel like Celina and she still have a strained relationship and having gotten to a close friendship YET. But Rachel being back is good for her. Look at that trauma dump she needed to let out.

I hope my sunshine girl starts gaining her sunshine back

Jalya

James stf. I 100% agree with his stance cause those teens deserve justice. But that is not the time or place. I think he needs to learn how to leave his work at work. Wesley too.

I think Nyla needs to be more open to conversation and not just stopping James. They both need a lot of growth in communication as a COUPLE. Not communication just about work.

They need to create boundaries. Like please boundaries will save yallll

Wopez

Wesley needs to fucking let it go. Angela is not gonna cheat, and now he’s letting it affect his home life. Like bro I hate to break it to you but in the world she works in, so many of those men think about Angela like that. Like it sucks and those men suck, BUT Angela went into that career knowing that. It sucks that women have to even acknowledging this part of a job. But it’s reality and if Welsey thinks this is the only man who has those thoughts then hes really showing his privilege as man.

He’s acting like this one man has flipped his world over. Like dude. 😐 the detective -idk his name- is an asshole. And he’s not the only one in that police station who has that thought about fellow female officers. If Wesley truly believed that the first one then he’s naive. You can say oh it’s probably because the detective works so close with Angela but like Angela was in patrol, she worked with plenty of men like that. Welsey has to know this.

I don’t like that they’re leaning into this idea that if Angela knows about how this detective feels about her then she’ll cheat. Like I know that they’re not actually saying that but they’re insinuating it and I don’t like that at all. Because she loves Wesley. She wouldn’t cheat on him so I’m like why are we even playing with this plot line. It felt like they picked this plot out of a hat and was like yeah this works because they didn’t know what to do with Wopez this season.

Being a woman in a man’s field is horrible and it sucks, and as a rich white man married to a Columbia & Mexican Woman you shouldn’t be delusional enough to believe she’s respected in the same way you are. You should know about what she’s most likely facing everyday. You should not get jealous over slimes men, and instead educate yourself 👏🏼 it should take you 7+ years to figure that out buddy (btw I love Wesley I just don’t like his plot this season).

[nausikaaa]

one of the things that most drives me to write my novel is honestly spite towards the amount of AUs i see where people are like "oh what if Odysseus adopted Astyanax instead of killing him, then everything would be okay!" because not only is it a blatant cop out to excuse Odysseus's worst moment (arguably- he also conspired to sacrifice a teenage girl and hide it from her mother, tortured a few guys, killed sleeping men, and framed a dude and got him stoned to death) but it also feels so incredibly disrespectful to Astyanax and his relatives.

first of all, where is Andromache in this situation?? does she know her son is alive, or has she been left believing he's dead? even if she does know he's alive, which is the slightly nicer option, i'm pretty sure she would still rather her son and last remnant of her dead husband be with her, his mother, not the man who was responsible for the destruction of her home and mass murder, rape and enslavement of her people. that cannot seem like a secure position in her eyes. that's a hostage situation. and maternal deprivation can seriously fuck up both mothers and children!

also, Odysseus took Hecabe in the war, and by many accounts he almost immediatly lost his temper and killed her because she wound him up by grieving too excessively. you know, because almost all of her family were killed? you really think he would be able to keep a cool head around a screaming baby who has been taken from his mother?

finally, Odysseus ends up running from one dangerous situation to another for three years. in that first year all his ships apart from his own get smashed up and the people on them cannibalised, and since he never mentions any women after that point, we have to assume the women he and his men took as slaves were on those ships. sucks to be them. (what's that? we have no proof he took any Trojan women (except Hecabe) as slaves? fair enough, that's true, though it's unlikely he didn't. but he does admit with his full chest to taking the Cicones women as slaves so. you know. (god imagine getting cannibalised and knowing that if Odysseus had just stayed in his lane you could be safe and happy instead. the Odyssey from the Cicones' perspective is actually horrifying. their families murdered and them kidnapped just to be killed and eaten and it glossed over in one paragraph... i'm getting distracted.)) so with no women present, what the hell is baby Astyanax eating? no wetnurse in sight. honestly if you're gonna woobify Odysseus this much at least make him breastfeed.

everyone he knows dies, and then he's trapped on an island for seven more years. that evidently messes his head up a bit, but just imagine how it would effect a kid. those crucial early years spent being flooded with stress hormones, then the developmental years spent in almost total isolation. OH AND THEN he gets home and Odysseus murders 100-something men (deserved) and 12 women (debatable) and mutilates a man ("hey kid, come look, I did this to your uncle Deiphobus too!")

Astyanax in this situation is going to be MESSED UP. we actually have a case study for this- the Roman emperor Tiberius, who also spent his early years on the run, in near constant danger (with his mother, at least)- he grew into a sullen teenager, then a bitter man, then turned extremely antisocial and abusive once he came to power, to the point of starving several family members he didn't like to death. this may be an extreme example, and him holding so much power certainly exacerbated things, but the issue was clearly rooted in childhood trauma.

and the thing is, i do think it can be done interestingly! i would love to see an AU where Odysseus takes Astyanax, but the reality of such an ubringing is shown. he can't regulate stress, he thinks everyone will leave him or die eventually, he's socially stunted, and over time he comes to understand that he will always be seen as an outsider and enemy in Greece. the internal conflict of realising that his supposed father facilitated the genocide of his people and stole him to spare his own conscience, and he has a family somewhere that believe him dead and he will never be able to truly connect with, because he fears he isn't Trojan enough either- he doesn't know the language, can't name the gods, hasn't worn the clothing or attended the festivals (i once saw one of these AU people refer to this as Astyanax's "biological history" and almost blacked out from rage. IT'S HIS FUCKING FAMILY AND CULTURE!!!) but nope, it's always just "everything is great, Astyanax loves his new family!!" it could be complex, but no. he NEVER seeks out his mother in these AUs, she can go to her grave thinking her son was murdered before his first birthday for all they care. it's child trafficking being presented as cute and fluffy.

so yeah. in my AU, Odysseus spares Astyanax the actual murder but still leaves him to essentially die, because it's about his own conscience, not the actual baby in his arms. and Astyanax does not forgive him. he is raised by Oenone (Paris's first wife, a mountain nymph) and Cassandra (who also miraculously survives (Odysseus adopting Cassandra AUs wind me up even more- THAT IS A GROWN WOMAN!! YOU TORTURED HER TWIN BROTHER YOU KILLED HER MOTHER OH MY GODDD it's so infantilising)) to actually know his history and heritage, so when he does eventually set out to find his mother, he knows who he is, and if he crosses paths with Odysseus it's on fucking sight, though luckily, Telegonus is already on it. OH YEAH! Telegonus! while Odysseus is raising somebody else's kid he's actually got a whole other one he doesn't even know about! now there's an ending for this AU, those two team up to kill him on behalf of their mistreated mothers.

and as a bonus, in my novel we get to see Odysseus be almost the worst person in the entire story (though he's pretty tied with Diomedes, Ajax and Agamemnon because all these men suck), because the war crimes are part of the appeal and i'm not afraid of complex characters. for all the vitriol i've written here, i actually really like Odysseus, i just want him to be portrayed accurately as a massive bastard.

[wiretism]

I honestly hate how the fandom treats Michael as a hero and I'm seeing posts about it so I feel a liiiittle better talkign about it

my moots are holding back, i can tell. but hes my favorite so im not. and im a little pissed writing this bc. bc i relate to cc a lot. and seeing ppl mischaracterize not only my favorite character but also someone who reminds me of people who fucking suck drives me INSANE.

so psa, im pissed as fuck and i love michael afton.

First off, he killed Evan. That's obvious. Not only was that literall 100% his fault (NOT WILLIAMS IT PISSES ME OFF WHEN PPL MAKE THAT ALL ABOUT WILLIAM SHUT THE FUVCK UP

he was a bully. yeah he was a kid. yeah he was messing with him. Have you considered he was literally. abusive to his brother. i know the fnaf fandom is scared of using that word to describe him but its fucking true. he was abusive. as fuck. that was awful what he did he wasnt just a bully he harassed him and literally locked him in his room. he was fucking horrible.

and yeah, he didnt mean for that to happen, but not only was that stupid as fuck, i hate any interpritation of "he wanted to be like his dad" "his friends coerced him" PLAY FNAF 4. PLAY FNAF 4. FUCKING PLAY FNAF 4 LOOK AT HIS DIALOGUE AND WHAT HE DOES

HE LITERALLY. EGGED IT ON. IT WAS HIS FUCKING IDEA. WHAT PART OF THAT GAVE "he was coerced" THUSHFUDFUDSIOFDUSOFDSIOS

im trying to be normal

Yeah he probably felt like shit after. yeah it probably was some sort of motivator behind his actions. but lets think. lets think.

fnaf 1 and 2 take place before SL, no? So. if thats true. why didnt he burn those down? to "free the souls?" because it was never about the children.

he burned down the fnaf 3 location to get rid of william. it was ALWAYS abotu william. sure he set the kids free but i reeeeaaallyy dont think that was his intention. it was always about william.

in sister location, did he go there out of the kindness of his heart? no he went there because william asked him too. it was ALWAYS about william. and yeah he probably wanted to help liz, he probably really wanted to help her, but based on his actions, was this really for her? or was it for closure

thats something about michael that i put in shitty brother. closure. he didnt actually want to reconcile with his family, he wanted closure on the guilt he felt. is that 100% wrong? no. its normal to want closure, especially after something like that. but also that should not be his goal

did he apologize? yes. he said sorry. he felt bad, sure. but when you kill someone tehy dont come back. evan deserves to never forgive him ever because that was dumb as fuck and HORRIBLE. IT WAS HORRIBLE. ABUSIVE. ILL SAY IT AGAIN

MICHAEL AFTON ABUSED HIS LITTLE BROTHER FOR NO FUCKING REASON.

yeah. abused. say it with me. A-B-U-S-E-D

not just bullied, not just harassed, ABUSED.

ik we're all scared to say it here but its fucking true. say it with ur chest.

this always came back to william. do i thinkk michael is unfeeling and doesnt care about his siblings at all? NO! I think his siblings drove a lot of his actions. but in the end i dont think he always acted with their best interest at heart. or the mci kids'

and the whole "he wanted to be like his dad" i dont fucking care actually. no seriously sit down beside me and tell me that wanting to be like his dad is an excuse for abusing his brother. seriously come closer i wont bite.

tell me how you think that AS A TEENAGER, 100% AWARE OF HIS ACTIONS, that wanting to be like his dad justifies abusing his little brother. his little brother. who as far as we know, never lashed out, never fought back, never did anything to him. tell me how he fucking deserved that

"Michael was just a kid!" so was Evan. So was Elizabeth. So was Cassidy and Charlie and all the kids who died.

tell me how much michael did that didnt revolve around closure and his father. like i get it, he had priorities, but can we please stop acting like he's some angel working for the greater good of everyone.

it feelslike how ppl treat fucking henry. NO HES NOT A GOOD PERSON PLEASE

MICHAEL IS SELFISH HE'S MESSY HE'S STUPID. HE MAKES BAD CHOICES IN FAVOR OF HIMSELF HE PRIORITIZES REVENGE OVER THE GREATER GOOD HE HURTS PEOPLE AND IT MAKES HIM SO MUHC MORE INTERESTING

oh and also in case anybody wants to pull dittophobia out and tell me how mike went thru that trauma

so did evan. and instead of bonding over that trauma, michael harassed him. ABUSED HIM. wording is important. im sorry for repeating myself so much, but nobody ever tells it how it is. it was abuse.

edit: People seem upset by my wording and honestly? fair. i couldve worded this a lot better but i was tired and irritated and one thing i will clarify

i dont care if u dont see adult michael the way i do. i see him as a selfish obsessive guy whos intent is to fix his family, but plenty of people see it differently and thats okay! /gen

but im not taking back anythign i said about teen michael. because i think to do that is unfair to his character and frankly bullshit. i think its bullshit. and i dont care if you disagree. he was a terrible brother and thats that

but adult mike is free real estate idk idrc abt him as much as teen mike.

[dozyrogue]

I wouldn't say the eggs are the only ones who care but I would 100% say they're the only ones who understand. Sunny, Chayanne, Tallulah, Ramon, and Richas have all tried to tell people there was something wrong with Tubbo. It's crazy to me that even after he died the other adults still don't realize how depressed he was. They're all either in denial or too stuck on the last couple weeks. I'd love to see Sunny get angry at someone and point out how many times they tried to ask for help, how many times they had to revive him, how many times they had to watch him hurt himself or watch others hurting him. She has every right to be angry as well as being sad over the death of her Pa.

Oh for sure fit and philza are in denial and completely ignoring it or saying hes throwing a tantrum which probably sucks for sunny, chayanne or the other eggos to hear.

But I totally agree sunny deserves to be angry at the adults around her for not helping her pa. Even if they don't wanna help tubbo. You would expect them to help one of the babies tbh. Even then I feel like if she did get angry it would be underplayed like her asking for help for tubbo in the first place.

[victimsofyaoipoll]

Round 1

Propaganda Under Cut

Yona

She’s the fiancé of prince Sidon, (arranged marriage) and since Sidon is almost always shipped with link, people went feral the second they saw her. She’s genuinely very kind and cares about her people and wants Sidon to be happy! She is NOT jealous, she wants him to hang out with his Best Friend. I have seen firsthand in real-time, people being SO misogynistic and cruel, and saying she’s ugly. She’s good in a crisis, very friendly, has a great design, and she doesn’t deserve the hate in the slightest!

I'M DESPERATELY TRYING TO FIND CUTE ART OF HER AND SIDON AND QUITE LITERALLY EVERYTHING REGARDING HER IS JUST STRAIGHT UP BLATANT HATE AND DENOUNCING HER AS SOME LAST MINUTE ADDITION TO THE STORY AS ORCHESTRATED BY JOHN NINTENDO TO STOP SIDLINK FROM BEING CANON LIKE THIS IS THE THE JOHNLOCK CONSPIRACY OR SOME MESS... i just want to see cute art of a green shark woman with a lovely smile :((((

so the breath of the wild fandom is pretty well known for REALLY liking prince sidon aka that one really tall fish guy. and they're also really well known for shipping him with link because every fandom needs a gay ship right. so then the sequel (totk) comes around and it's revealed that sidon has a fiance now and it's not link it's some zora girl from another domain. the game hasn't even been out for a month but i've seen people act so vile towards her like yona get behind me!!!!

Zelda

She spent 100 years in a metaphysical wrestling match with an ancient and primal evil after seeing it destroy almost everyone and everything she held dear in the hopes of saving the few that remained and Link's main goal after HIYAHing his way out of a amnesia-inducing coma was to come in and tag team said evil in order to save her and like 90% of the memories he can regain focus on their relationship with each other and its gradual improvement up to the point where Link fucking dies protecting her and it's the push she needs to awaken the power to push back the blight and PEOPLE ARE STILL OUT THERE IN THEIR POST-CANON FANWORKS TRYING TO TELL ME THAT LINK FUCKS OFF AND LEAVES HER ALONE TO GO SMOOCH THE HOT FISH PRINCE BECAUSE ZELDA WAS BEING TOO OVERBEARING OR WHATEVER AND HE COULDN'T DEAL WITH THE EXPECTATION??? LIKE ZELDA'S WHOLE FUCKING ARC WASNT ALSO ABOUT HER STRUGGLING WITH EXPECTATION AND FAILING TO LIVE UP TO IT AND YOU WANT ME TO BELIEVE THIS WUALITY THEY BOTH OSTENSIBLY HAVE IN COMMON WOULD DRIVE A WEDGE BETWEEN THEM?? WHERE'S ZELDA YOU COWARDS?? I DON'T EVEN CARE IF YOU DON'T WANT HER AND LINK TO BE TOGETHER, JUST STOP DIMINISHING THE GRAVITY OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP AND MAKING ZELDA SUCK FOR NO REASON. SHE'S A BIG NERD! SHE GETS TOO IN HER OWN HEAD! SHE'D DO ANYTHING TO HELP THE PEOPLE SHE CARES ABOUT! SHE UNASHAMEDLY AND EXCITEDLY TRIED TO FEED HER PERSONAL KNIGHT A LIVE FROG IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE! HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE HER 

Im specifically saying botw Zelda here because oh my gOSH this poor girl can get made out to be like a horrible bitch when people. want link to get that shark dick. on average she doesnt get thattttt badly treated compared to some others but goddamn.

title character but people hate her because they want link to get w sidon. so she gets fridged or entirely forgotten even though shes literally his canonical soulmate and they have been reincarnated together hundreds of times (w ganon but whether u make em poly or make him the long suffering third wheel is up to you). people will be like oh but zelda was mean to him that one time (??). be serious w me rn. she just got removed from fandom entirely and if that isnt the epitome of victim of yaoi idk what is.

[my-castles-crumbling]

Anon Advice Asks - February 25

snarky friend anon (new), waxing anon (new), commitment anon, shy anon, confuddled anon

snarky friend anon

hi cas!

i have this friend who i don’t really know what to do with?

whenever i mention fanfic or tumblr or anything like that at all he gets really snarky and passive aggressive and it just doesn’t feel great

i know that he just sort of feels like i’ve moved on without him, because we used to have a lot of the same interests and now my interests have shifted and his haven’t

i can 100% understand how it would suck from his perspective, but it seems like i’m always walking on eggshells around him, trying to avoid certain topics

and even if i do it seems like he makes it about them anyway?

i’ve tried asking him to ask his parents for therapy (his family is very well off and he says his parents wouldn’t have a problem with it) but he doesn’t want to have that conversation, but i don’t really know what to do

his mental health is kind of shit and he worries a lot about losing friends but also he’s kind of been treating a lot of people kind of shitty (he’s a really good person, i’ve been friends with him for like 5 years) and just taking his anger out on them

if i mention anything like this to him he just spins it into a “sorry i’m a horrible friend” this and im really at my wits end

he’s not happy, and him taking it out on me isn’t making me happy either

anyway i have no idea what to do :)

Hi!

I'm so sorry, this sounds so frustrating.

Honestly though, the only thing you can do is tell him how you feel. If you've told him that you feel like he's being unfair and he just gets angry, then there's really nothing you can do.

The thing is...yeah, he might end up blaming the change in your friendship on you, but the reality is, the cause isn't your new interest in fanfic. Regardless of that, you're still trying to communicate. HE is the one shutting you out. And if he chooses to do that, he's going to lose you. You can't keep pushing a friendship that hurts you just to help him not get hurt. That's not fair to you.

____________

Waxing anon

honestly, hon, I'm not sure if hiding it is best. this might be the push you need to ask for some help, you know? I know it's so scary to admit that you need help like this but you deserve to feel happy and to not want to do these things. so yeah...I don't know if telling you how to hide it is the best idea.

__________

commitment anon

Hey Cas. Commitment anon again.

So, for context, D knows that K does not like him now, and we've had a pretty big fallout. They aren't friends anymore, but I still am with both. It's kind of confusing and hard to just try and not take a side of one story, especially when I know there is one extremely different interpretation from the other. It feels like I'm ripping myself apart trying to balance both of my friendships and my maybe-still-there crush on K.

I text with D and talk at school with K, usually. D. Knows about my crush now, and he's kind of neutral with it, but I know he feels betrayed.

D and I still talk almost everyday though. We've talked about the fallout and K a lot of the time. I usually comfort him when he has panic attacks and breakdowns, but the thing is whenever I do that it feels like a chore and I know it shouldn't. I don't even feel any sympathy or compassion or empathy. Or any emotion at all. Nothing is there and I think nothing really has been.

I've always known that I don't really feel many emotions like that, but I've thought about it and I don't think they're there at all. Like, I realized that whenever something bad happens, but emotions don't really change. The sorry's aren't really genuine, it's just. Courtesy I think. I don't feel sorry, but I don't feel selfish, or anything. It's just blankness.

I know that's wrong, too. I should feel at least a little, but I don't. I don't feel bad when I say something rude, or when someone dies, or when someone is crying. It's just fake apologies and comfort. I think I'm broken. Or something like that.

I don't even know what to do anymore and I can't tell my friends because they won't understand, they'd just get mad that I've comforted them without really feeling sorry. They'd hate me if they knew and I don't want them to.

Hi <3

I don't think you're broken and I don't think your friends would hate you. Honestly, there's a lot of reasons why someone might (not) feel like this, but it does make me think that maybe you need to talk to an adult about it. NOT because you're broken, but because sometimes when people feel like this, it could be because of something that happened in the past. I think you deserve to understand your emotions, and to do that, you might need to talk to a therapist or someone similar, you know? Are you able to do that?

__________

Shy anon

Hi cas just checking in

how're u doing?

How do you deal with blatant or underhand sexism coming from an adult in your life who you are currently unable to escape from.

XOXO

Shy anon

I think it depends. If they're someone who you rely on for something life-saving (food, shelter, etc) then unfortunately, I wouldn't push too much. Instead, focus on the future, and readying yourself for a time when you don't have to rely on them anymore.

If they're NOT someone you rely on, I'd ask questions. Like if they say women belong in the kitchen, be like "Oh, so men aren't capable of cooking?" You know, get them thinking about how stupid their ideas are.

Also congrats on your AP test!

___

Confuddled anon

Hey its confuddled anon!!

I have an update.

Drum roll please!

He.... got arrested today! That's right folks, he is about to be a felon with a count of breaking and entering ✌️💅💋🎀✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

So yah, absolutely not confuddled anymore, very much clear that I have zero romantic feelings for him. But seriously, what kind of idiot do you have to be to break into someone's house and just hang out there??

It's also really funny because while he was getting arrested I was picking up trash off the side of the road, we were literally being complete opposites.

So... yah! I'll keep you updated about what happens with that :))))

With complete clarity and disgust,

-confuddled anon :)))

Well. That clears that up. Glad you figured it out, lol! At least you know that whoever you date in the future HAS to be better than that! (I certainly hope)

[plusultraetc]

I LIED. I have more to say. 423/technically 424 spoilers under the link!!

I couldn’t help myself. I read the leaks, I stared contemplatively at the wall, I puzzled over how I felt about them. I want to start by saying that I am a Shigaraki lives believer and I will be until at least six months after the manga has well and truly ended. Maybe until after the anime has ended. We'll see. Either way, I STILL don't 100% believe he's gone. However, no shade to anyone who does believe he’s dead & likes the ending that way. You’re valid!! But I've been thinking about why Shigaraki's apparent 'death' bothers me so much.

It's not just because I like Shigaraki. It's not just because I wanted him to be saved. There are plenty of stories in which the bad guy dies at the end, even if it narratively doesn't feel like they 'deserve' it. There are even plenty of stories in which the hero is unmoved by a sympathetic villain's death. But those stories don't bother me as much as this potential ending does, and I think it's because from the start--and I do mean the very, very start--Midoriya has been billed to the audience as the next 'world's greatest hero.' This is literally what we are told the story is about. And I think, to me, yeah, being really really strong and defeating a villain like All For One does make you a great hero. AFO sucks. I hate that guy.

But what would make you the world's greatest hero would be saving the one character we are reminded time and time again that no hero ever showed up to save. That would be something the world's greatest hero would do.

(btw, in that way, the true 'world's greatest hero' of MHA is Kurogiri, because in spite of the conditioning/brainwashing/bioengineering, he tried to save Shigaraki. Right up until the end, he tried. He saw him as more human than anyone else in the series. Ily Kurogiri.)