#he said you know what these two-especially chuuya- needs on their birthday?

[sad-emo-dip-dye]

Cant believe that chuuya and atsushis birthday presents are fighting your partner/rival/lover while in a half dead mind controlled state, 0/10, worst birthday party ever

[chuuyasheaven]

♡ Everything for you, my love. (pt 2) ♡

Tags: Chuuya Nakahara / afab! Reader, sexting?, sending nudes, Reader's a bit drunk, Husband! Chuuya, EVERYTHING IS CONSENTED, rough sex?, pet names (doll, baby, angel, sweetheart), praising (afab! receiving), spanking (like once), birthday sex, slight teasing, overstimulation?, Reader's wearing lingerie+thighs highs (also has thick thighs), dumbification?, might contain grammar errors, rushed, etc.

Notes: I WANT NEED HIM TO DO THIS TO ME 😔

It really sucked that your husband, Chuuya, had to work, especially on your birthday! He said that he won't have to tomorrow, but you needed him. What's a birthday without him fucking you dumb? You thought about asking him to leave early, but knowing he'll won't. Then you came up with something else. .

You: Hey Chuuya Chuuya: Hey You: I miss you, can't you come home early? :( Chuuya: I wish i could, I'm really sorry, baby. I swear when I come home we can celebrate your birthday You: When will you come home tho? Chuuya: I don't really know, 9pm? You: But that's way too long! Chuuya: I know, I'm sorry I'll try to hurry up okay? You: Alright, let me send something to make it better! ;) *3 attachments sent*

When Chuuya clicked on the photos, his eyes widened. Three photos of you in black laced lingerie with matching thigh highs, all in three different angles. You were lucky he was in his office, anyone could've seen these if he wasn't careful enough!

Chuuya: Are you really gonna do this to me? You: Can't I send you some selfies? Chuuya: I'll be home soon, you better prepare yourself.

You put your phone next to you, waiting for him to arrive. You started feeling excited, thinking about how he would fuck the living daylights out of you. After waiting for two hours, you heard the door open, footsteps making their way to you. Just as you sat up, Chuuya walked through your bedrooms door. He kept on walking until he stood before you, grabbing your chin to make you look at him. "So you could've come home sooner?", you asked in a teasing tone. "It's complicated, but it's not important right now.", Chuuya said, letting go off your chin to pull you on your feet. Chuuya then smashed his lips against yours, his hands now sliding down to your waist.

Separating from eachother, Chuuya continues to speak. "Couldn't my wife wait for me to come home?", he teased, you giggled before responding. "Chuuya, it's my birthday. What kind of birthday would it be if I wasn't spending it with my husband?", Chuuya chuckled before sitting down onto your shared bed, patting his lap as a signal for you to sit down. As you did, he stroked your hair gently, kissing you again. From kissing you deeper, he tasted some light wine in your breath. After the make out session, his hand made it's way to your thighs. "You look so fuckin' beautiful, doll,", he said.

His hand slid down to your black laced panties, playing with your cunt through your panties. Your breath got heavier as he got you wetter than you were before. "You're already wet?", Chuuya asked with a smirk on his face. Your hands made it down to his belt, trying to unbuckle it. When his belt was unbuckled, you then removed everything else in the way until you got his dick out. Before you can fuck yourself on it, he wanted you to beg first. "Nuh uh. You gotta ask nicely first, sweetheart.", you groan in slight frustration before doing what he said. "Please, Chuuya. . I need you so bad right now.", all he did was nod while pushing your panties to the side. You put it inside you and whimpered at the feeling of stretching you out.

Waiting a bit for it to adjust, Chuuya kissed you again. "Now ride me like a good girl, alright, baby?", you nodded, starting to move your hips trying to find a rhythm. His hands on your hips guiding you how to move. As soon you got a steady rhythm, you started to whimper louder while Chuuya was grunting softly. "S–shit, keep going, doll. .",you sped up a little when you suddenly felt a spank on your ass. "Who's a good girl f'me, hm?", you got even more turned on because of the spank when another one was heard. "Answer my question, baby. Who's being a good girl right now?", "Me, I–i am!", you choked out. It wasn't long until you came around him, gushing around his cock as he came inside you.

You were trying to calm down before Chuuya easily picked up and laid you onto the bed. He took off your panties and threw them somewhere. "I can't let the birthday girl do all the work, now can I?", Chuuya slid inside you and waited a few seconds before moving, when you adjusted again, he started to thrust into you. His pace was slow and rough, his grunts becoming more audible. Your whimpers turned into moans now, which were music to Chuuya's ears. He got faster, picking up both of your legs and positioned them on his shoulders, resulting him to fuck into you deeper. You already felt your second orgasm near, chanting his name like an prayer. "You're doin' so good— fuck. . so pretty for me, aren't you, angel?", he praised you again.

"Chuuya, 'm close— ah!", you tried to warn him but he kept on thrusting into you, needing you to gush around his dick once more. "You wanna cum? You wanna cum around my cock again, huh?", at this point you weren't able to talk right now. "Tell me, who was being good tonight?", you tried to really answer but all what left your mouth were only either his name or moans. "C'mon, I know you can say it. I haven't fucked you dumb now, have I, sweetheart?", "N–no,", you managed to respond. "See? Let me ask again, who was my good girl tonight?", you took in some heavy breaths trying to concentrate. "I–it's me. .", you answered him, he smirked before cumming inside you and you came around his cock again.

"Do you want me to continue going or wanna go take a bath? It's up to you, baby."

HOPE YOU ENJOYED BCS THIS TOOK ME A LONGGG TIME !! :)

[ravencincaide]

Just a cake

Summary:  What was supposed to be a sweet innocent question aimed at gaining a sliver of Chuuya’s attention spiraled out of control. It shook the foundation of your relationship and everything you thought you knew. Indeed with one innocent question you lost it all- and yet saved yourself two decades of suffering all in one go. 

Pairing: Fem reader x Chuuya Nakahara 

Inspired by Raven’s special anon request: Chuuya says something that hurts the reader and she leaves. 

Warnings: Cursing, verbal argument, angst

Enjoy~

“ Can I ask for a birthday cake for my birthday?” 

Your tone was light and playful, almost joking- a stupid question meant to lighten the focused mood in the dark, stuffy, paperwork-filled office. A silent cry for a sliver of his attention, just a tiny reassurance that despite the heavy workload which plagued your lives, that he still cared enough not to forget about your important day. You envisioned that Chuuya would pull you into his lap. Then he’d kiss your skin in between bites of bento that you just brought to him just moments earlier. You envisioned a sweet promise that he had already ordered the best cake in Yokohama. or that he would tap your nose with a gloved finger while he demanded to know what kind of boyfriend you thought he was. 

Especially when all you asked for this year was a cake and homemade dinner.  Just a little time together in the privacy of your home.  You and him without praying eyes. Just you and him. Just you, the special news and–

“ Hmff what kinda cake do you want?” you flinched at his tone and paused in the middle of sorting paperwork, unsure whether you heard him right. Your eyes flickered upwards to meet Chuuya’s narrowed ones. Clear frustration itched into his face “ Tell me now the kind you want, doll. Or I’ll just pick something up on the way” You bit your lip. You knew you did not want just ‘something’; a day-old cake from the bakery, or a generic one from any grocery store still open once he got off work. You wanted a cake picked with time and care, selected with you in mind. The type of dedication he’d show whenever he got wine for his friends' birthdays. The warm kind of affection he’d shower you in on good days. The picture perfect generous and loving boyfriend in the eyes of others. 

“ Don’t bother,” you answered without anger. “ With that attitude, I’ll fix it myself.” You felt his narrowed eyes glare at you, but you did not spare him a second glance. You were afraid that his expression would make the burning rod of anger explode and escalate the situation further. 

Neither of you needed that now. 

“ Oj I said I’ll fix it” Chuuya snapped back “ Just stop fuckin asking about it constantly.” 

His comment was the wrong thing to say. It was the straw that broke the camel's back, the words that made the anger in your stomach spike into an uncontrollable fury. “ You know what? Don't bother getting me anything!” you hissed “ I don’t need a goddamn thing from you.” 

“ What the hell is your fuckin issue?” Chuuya’s fist made contact with the table, his action made the stack of your newly sorted paperwork slide down towards the floor “ You’ve been having a goddamn attitude lately, the hells your problem?!” 

“ I don’t know, maybe if you actually took your time to come home once in a while you’d know!” your palms hands slammed against the table in equally furious fashion. 

Chuuya let out a growl- bit back the insult at the tip of his tongue. Still his words came out just as sharp as before, if not more painful, blaming “ Do you even understand my financial role? Or do you think my apartment gets paid for by itself, just like the wine and other ‘necessities’?-” You opened your mouth, ready to snap back that he had himself to blame for refusing to take a damned penny off your hands. He had no right to blame you when you had offered to pay time and time again only for him to stuff the money right back into your hand. But he did not let you speak. No, Chuuya kept going, not finished in his fury-filled trade. “ - Besides who the fuck would want to come home to someone constantly ungratefully pissy, hmm?” 

“If that’s how you’re feeling then we shouldn’t be together at all” your voice was just shy of a scream, your eyes full of humiliated anger. There was one thing to be pissy because of work related stress but this was crossing boundaries even Chuuya would normally stay clear of. 

Not today. 

“ Maybe you’re fucking right about that doll!” Chuuya didn't yell. Yet his words echoed loudly, louder than any other sound in his god forsaken office.  

You felt like you were slapped. The fight left your system with one big exhale. Your shoulders slumped and you bowed your head. Hands returned to your sides, balled into tight fists. 

Chuuya waited for you to say something. When you didn’t he let out a long sigh and turned back to the papers in front of him. You heard the way he picked up his pen, the scratches of the tip against the pristine papers “ I’ll send someone with you to get your things.” 

“ Don’t bother, I don’t need or want jack-shit from you” you turned on your heel and headed in the direction of the office door. 

Chuuya spoke again before you could leave his office; “ Don’t bother coming back to the Mafia. You’re relieved of your duties.” 

A sense of dread filled you but you were too proud to show it. Your lips set into a thin line as your hand lingered on the doorknob. “ As you wish. Don’t come crying to me when you’ll regret this later.” you spat then snuck out of the room right before Chuuya’s fury could reach you. 

You closed the office door just in time to hear something smash against it behind you, presumably the half eaten bento you had taken such time and care to prepare for him. Made his favourite things and brought it over for him too. 

Fucking ungrateful bastard. 

 A dull frozen feeling set  in your body- your mind hadn’t processed what had just transpired. Could not understand how you had lost everything; your home, your job, your lover and your life over a simple question. A request for something other than a last minute generic cake for your upcoming birthday. 

Still as you sat down in your car and pulled out of the Port Mafia parking lot for the last time in your life you couldn’t help the tears that streamed down your cheeks. The suffocating heartache- but also the tiny bit of relief that bloomed in your chest. The relief at the fact that the bloodthirsty executive of the Mafia finally showed his true colours- true thoughts- about you. Blamed you for the fact that you had stayed home from work during the past weeks. Blamed you for the insufferable act of wanting your partners attention. No, he was your ex partner and that was for the better. 

It was better that you broke up now than if something similar happened in the next weeks. Or so you told yourself. A few days from now you would have told him the truth and then you would have been trapped with him. By him. A caged bird with no chance to escape. No you should be happy, thankful that he decided to finally show the ugly of his character. 

Murderer unable to handle a heart. 

As similar thoughts ran through your mind, you couldn’t help the almost manic smile that appeared on your lips as you drove further and further away from the life you knew. After all, you were certain Chuuya would come to regret this decision in the future. 

But by then it would be too late. 

Your eyes flickered to the passenger seat where a large, obnoxious gift bag sat. With huge golden letters it spelled out “congratulations” and from it peeked out a shirt with the words; 

You’re going to be a dad…

Author note: And Chuuya would most certain regret his actions ...

Hope you enjoyed this little special addition to Raven's special that's the lengths of an actual fic. Yes I've had it prepared in advance and used this as an excuse to publish it. Hope this angst hurt just a tiny bit more than the previous. Don't forget to check Raven's masterlist! and wait for the next Special ;) ©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reposted/copied anywhere else without my consent, please inform me!

[poe-tat]

As the sun was setting one evening it was Chuuya's birthday and Atsushi had hung out with Chuuya all day which meant he had also hung out with Dazai.

Dazai had finally left to the sad shack that is his home, leaving Atsushi and Chuuya alone.

Atsushi looked towards the short red head that is Chuuya. He stared at the sunset while his gaze looking distant like his mind is no longer in this world.

Atsushi spoke, "so Chuuya may I learn more about you and Dazai?" He asked and Chuuya looked at him shocked he blinked and a small smile formed on his lips "sure kiddo what do you want to learn?" He asked atsushi gasped and anxiously said, "well it doesn't matter what I learn I just want to learn more about you and Dazai-san.." He said

Chuuya blinked and then said "well I've known him most of my life especially in the mafia in fact that ass hole was the reason I was in there in the first place" he said the last part he had grit his teeth. "Do I wanna know?" Atsushi questioned Chuuya shrugged "it was either join or all my friends got killed" he said Atsushi didn't know why he was shocked it wasn't any less of what he expected

Chuuya sighed "well I after sometime in the mafia Dazai left" he said looking up at the sunset with a frown forming against his lips.

Atsushi blinked a few times "well you said Dazai left right? Why do you still hang out with him?" He asked confused

Chuuya smiled while staring at the setting sun "because out of all of those that had left me... He was the only one that came back after a while" he said still smiling Atsushi didn't know what he expected or what to say so he just said, "Oh.."

Sometime later

The port Mafia and Agency had attended a funeral of The executive Chuuya Nakahara and Osamu Dazai.

They all paid their respects to the most devastating rivals in history.

Everyone had said something about the two that knew them starting with Mori

His was, "they never failed to fight about something so I just know those two are in hell fighting about something as we speak"

Since that was the best anyone could describe the two together just about everyone did individually

And too make you all laugh

Meanwhile in hell

The red head and brunette where well like Mori said arguing

Dazai groaned "Slug, you don't even know what you are talking about and will you stop taking up all the fire?!" Chuuya made a face "I don't know what I'm talking about? You don't even know what you're talking about! With your taking up all the fire talking ass!!" He hissed

That is the closest thing I could get to stop breathing my air I could get with out it being that because well they're dead and don't need to breathe

Yes I can't take my angst seriously sometimes and add humour so it's not too sad for some reason

Questions

Atsushi: so Chuuya... You said Dazai left you? Why do you still hang out with him?..

Chuuya: because out of all the people in my life that left... He was the only one who came back

Atsushi: oh..

[dinosaurtsukki]

bsd as their zodiac signs | armed detective agency

a/n: i started out this blog with a hq as their zodiac signs post so i thought i should do one for bsd too !!

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osamu dazai | gemini

oh god i fucking knew it like dazai just screams gemini to me it's not even a surprise at this point

intelligence? check. sense of humor? check. talkative/chatty? check. dual-sidedness? check.

him being chaotic as fuck and unpredictable is just very gemini

as well as him being able to switch between being more light-hearted and cracking jokes to being all serious and kinda intimidating

geminis, like other air signs, are known for being intellectual too and quite skilled at a lot of things

aka dazai's many hidden talents (he apparently control his own heart rate like bitch wtf---)

he's not exactly the most loyal person either but more for the reasons that dazai thinks it's probably superficial. he knows very well that things can easily change with time and is adaptive because of that

very good at just,,, avoiding things in general

his legs are long because he uses them to run away from his problems

isn't the best when it comes to empathy and he definitely has a hard time connecting to people emotionally

but when he does, he treasures them quite dearly

his love language is roasting even though he is a bit of a flirt

that said, he likes being around people who just understand him in a way that even dazai doesn't

in terms of ideal partner, i think dazai wouldn't mind someone who's different from him personality-wise and he can get along with pretty much anyone

kunikida doppo | virgo

i was guessing that this guy was either a virgo or a capricorn and he definitely fits being a virgo

him being super rigid and organized when it comes to his work and schedule is very virgo since they're especially meticulous

just like dazai's he's very much a 'what are emotions?' kind of person (jk he knows anger but that's also because of dazai)

kunikida can also get quite nitpicky but that's because he expects a certain standard when it comes to things

he's a huge fan of marie kondo and declutters his house regularly. probably has a spice rack that's arranged in alphabetical order

him hating things that are out of schedule or haphazardly-made, spur-of-the-moment plans is also very virgo

SO good at repressing sadness and negative thoughts so he needs someone to truly open up with

also very detail-oriented. he'll take notice if things are just the slightest bit different or off. it helps him a lot in missions since he's very observant

king of self-control like how does he even do it ??

doesn't smoke or drink or any of those things

heck, he doesn't even eat junk food or sleep in late

okay but i feel like when or if he does get drunk, kunikida would already buy himself some hangover cures and place a glass of water on his nightstand table for hungover!kunikida

i feel like he has an aquarius placement in mars because of his idealism

atsushi nakajima | taurus

ngl i didn't really picture him as a taurus so i feel like his moon is in cancer because of how gentle and warm he is as a person (wow i'm really stroking my own cancer ego here)

a very loyal king and more than a little stubborn when it comes to that but he's very reliable

it actually bothers him a lot when he's unable to get something required of him done, whether its a really important mission or just something small

has an EXCELLENT memory for things. like, if you mention absentmindedly that you like orange popsicles he'll suddenly buy them for you because he knows you like them

atsushi probably really loves being in nature too and taking hikes when he's not too busy with work

just,, imagine him,,, picking wildflowers,,, and bringing them to the office,,, i'm soft i can't

he has a thing for making money but very careful about spending. the only time he really does spend is when he's giving to other people (like kyouka)

buying stuff for people = buying stuff for himself

okay but most of atsushi's money is spent on buying food (aka chazuke) and i bet he's invested some time in cooking for himself

has a stubborn streak but it's mostly fixated at how much he cares for people

he'll go out of his way to plan birthday parties or do a favor for someone even after telling him he doesn’t have to

edogawa ranpo | libra

another smart air sign boi !!

libras are like the uwu air signs but in my experience no two libras are the same and a lot of their personality kind of depends on their other placements

kind of like dazai, ranpo isn’t one to easily empathize with people and he’s a bit dense when it comes to detecting emotional cues

has an inability to specifically choose what he wants to eat so he solves it by choosing everything

aka will clean out the convenience store with one visit and then probably call kunikida if he doesn’t have enough money

libras are also known to be very affectionate around people and also quite charming

you can see this in ranpo as he does have that skill of manipulating people. he can easily cause them to be frustrated and lose their cool (case in point: chuuya)

and in many ways, his attitude and skill demands respect from his peers

libras are also driven by a need for justice and ranpo does exhibit this is a bit

his idea of justice is quite different from kunikida since ranpo has a bit more self-preserving tendencies

but for him, the idea ‘what’s right’ is attributed to the people he knows has a strong moral compass (aka, he’d do anything to support/follow fukuzawa and kunikida ideals)

although i do think ranpo also has a basic sense of doing what’s right and he does it for the detective agency

he’s really good at arguing even though he probably hates arguing. but he DOES lowkey love watching people fight

sometimes he’ll stir the pot a bit in the office but fukuzawa already knows ranpo started it

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taglist (check out my post for details on being part of my taglist): @waitforitillwritemywayout @atsumusdomain​​ @laure-chan @goodfoodxoxoxo ​ @guardianangelswings @ah-kaashi @amberalisa​ @whootwhoot​ @liz-multifandom-hotel​​ @kac-chowsballs​​ @violentfarewll

[bungou-stray-dingus]

I’ve just read the head cannons of Chuuya and Dazai’s bebes and I love it 🥰 can you write how they’ll react when someone kidnapped their babies and how they would get them back? QwQ

A/N : I've been gone for so long and I'm so sorry. This request and many others have laid dormant in my ask box for many many months and I'm so sorry. I went through big depression kick, and I didn't write for a while. I ended up getting laid off from my job because of the rona, and everything just felt uncertain for a while and I honestly didn't really know what to do. I slowly got back into writing, starting off with my fanfiction just to get back into the swing of it, and now I'm ready to make y'all proud and finish all the requests! I'm sorry for making you all wait so long, and I want this request and all other requests that I answer to be amazing for all of you. So, here we go! -Hopefully (still) Your Favorite Dingus

T/W : angst; kidnapping; slight mention of blood;

Osamu Dazai

Kazue was the literal light of his life, aside from you... obviously. You and his son were the center of his entire universe, he would do anything for you and his son. He made that quite known, considering how spoiled your son was already. At three years old, Dazai had already managed to buy your son everything he did, and sometimes didn't need.

Your son was a lot like his dad in the way that he liked to run off often, having you worried sick in the middle of the grocery store of mall. Dazai would often find him at the gumball machines or the tiny change eating rides in the middle of the mall. Your son hated to be confined in his stroller, and Dazai agreed that strollers were awful contraptions and that your son should be allowed to walk around.

His views quickly changed when you were out shopping for groceries one afternoon. Dazai was at work, and trying to keep your son in the shopping cart proved to be impossible, so you had agreed to let him out of the cart as long as he stayed close to you and hold your hand. You promised to get him candy if he followed those two simple rules, but thanks to Dazais relaxed parenting, your son just assumed he'd get candy no matter what. (Thanks Dazai)

You had only let go of his hand for a second, kneeling down to grab something from the bottom shelf. The last thing you heard was the small cry of "Momma!" and when you shot up and turned around he was gone. Your heart sank as you dropped the item in your hand and ran to the front of the store, asking the employees if they had seen your son, showing them the pictures in your wallet, and all of them shook their head, only able to offer their sympathies to you.

Calling your husband was the hardest part, trying to keep your voice and your hands steady as you held your phone up to your ear. The employees had already called the police for you, and they were scouring the entire store trying to look for any clue as to where your son could be.

When you had managed to tell Dazai what happened, he was on his way to the store, he didn't waste any time at all. He was furious, and at first he took his anger out on you. "I thought you were watching him!" "How could you let this happen?!" "Why would you let him go!?" He was angry and he wasn't thinking straight, but as soon as he saw how his words affected you, he quickly pulled you into a hug, peppering the top of your head with kisses. "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry, darling. It's not your fault."

An officer brought over Kazue's stuffed kitty cat which was a gift from Fukuzawa. He had gotten it on his first birthday and refused to part with it, he brought it with him everywhere. The sight of the kitty cat not being held by Kazue made you throw up immediately, your mind jumping to the worst possible scenario. You heard Dazai grit his teeth, his arm was wrapped around you tightly, and his grip on your shirt tightened.

The two of you race to the Agency, every other case that they had been working on is dropped instantly. Desks are cleared and pushed together to draw out a map of the entirety of Yokohama. You're sitting on one of the couches in the office, Kazue's kitten clutched against your chest, your tears soaking the top of the plushy. The light in Dazais eyes has disappeared completely, he's stern, on edge. His voice is hard but you can hear it break occasionally at the end of his sentences, especially when he says his sons name.

Ranpo and Atsushi are the main people Dazai communicates with, his voice is mixed with the constant slamming of his fists on the desk when his emotions take over completely. "Where the hell is my son!?" He shouts as he drops his head into his hands. That's the only time he'll cry, his body shaking violently. You walk over and wrap your arms around him from behind, your chin resting on his shoulder as you both sob.

Everyone had been sitting around the office quietly watching you and Dazai have your moment. They all felt hopeless, especially when Dazai had initially went to Ranpo and he didn't seem to have a clue as to where Kazue was or who had taken him. "Why... Why would anyone take him? What's the reason? I want to know a reason!" Dazai shouted, his fists once again coming down on the desk. You pulled away quickly, giving him his space to lash out. He threw everything off the desk, his head dropping into his arms that were folded against the desk and letting out a scream.

His strength was being tested, he was breaking. It killed you to see him like this, you knew that there was nothing you could do to calm him. There was nothing worse that could ever happen to him, his son was everything to him. Kazue was the reason he had stopped attempting suicide, Kazue gave him a reason to stay alive, Kazue was his life line. Dazai loved his son with every fiber of his being, and right now he not only lost his son, he lost his reason for living. If anything were to happen to your son, if the worst case scenario was the actual case, you were sure that you would lose your husband as well.

All hope had seemed lost, the sun was quickly setting over the city. Everyone was emotionally exhausted. You were curled up on the couch, your head resting on Dazai's lap, his fingers massaging your scalp. "Please, get some rest darling. You need it." He whispered to you when he saw you slowly drift to sleep only to have your eyes open quickly. You felt bad for falling asleep, knowing that your son was out there somewhere without you or his father.

You handed Dazai the stuffed kitten before rolling over and trying to get comfortable. "Here, if anything comes up.. he's gonna need his Fuwa." You said sleepily, and you heard Dazai's chuckle, it sounded like he was being choked. He sniffled as he grabbed the kitten and brought it up to his face, silently crying into it.

Ranpo stood up from his chair and made his way over to the desk, pulling the map up off the floor and laying it flat on the desk. His eyes were wide open, the soft emerald green had long since turned as hard as the gem itself. Dazai shifted you off his lap and made his way over to Ranpo, stuffing Fuwa into his coat pocket. Atsushi followed him over and they both peered over Ranpo's shoulder, looking down at the map, following where Ranpo pointed with his fingers.

"The warehouse... next to the Port. Whoever it was quick enough to be gone before Y/N could notice, but he was still able to drop his cat. That means the person was on foot, so this person would have to be somewhere close to the store so a scene wouldn't be made, but somewhere they could hide him. They're most likely expecting us to show up, they want something in return, this is a ransom kidnapping." Ranpo said and Dazai nodded, trusting him with 100% of his being. He had to be right, but Dazai also knew how some ransom situations worked out. If it took too long...

"We have to go now." Dazai growled, and Ranpo nodded, Atsushi "hmph"ing in agreement. Kunikida stood up from his chair, joining the three of them by the door.

"None of you know how to drive. Let's go." Kunikida had a soft spot for Kazue, he wanted your son home safe as much as everyone else. (Even if he thought his father was a complete dunce.)

Everyone in the office agreed to stay with you just in case you woke up before the four of them got back, and with that they all ran out the door, hopping into Kunikida's car and speeding off towards the warehouse.

When they got there, they snuck up to the doors of the warehouse. Dazai leaned his head against the door, hoping to hear something, anything that would indicate that his son was in there. His heart was beating fast, and as much as he wanted to murder someone for stealing his son in the first place, he wanted to bring Kazue home with him, bring him back to you safe and sound more than anything else.

"Momma... Daddy..." He heard the soft whimpers of his son coming from the inside of the warehouse. It sounded like he was crying and Dazai to control his urge to kick down the door right then and there. He needed to be careful so that no harm would come to his son, but the sounds of his son softly crying had him seeing red. "Pwease..." He heard his son again and his heart shattered, the sound of his son pleading with his captor had him on the verge of an anger induced emotional breakdown.

Kunikida pulled the gun from the back of his pants and silently counted down from three before they pulled the door open. All four of them had guns, refusing to let Atsushi use his ability out of fear of hurting Kazue. There was one man in the corner of the room, a gun pointed at the head of your son as he smirked up at the four men. They all stopped dead in their tracks, dropping their guns to the ground and holding their hands up in the air. "Please, don't hurt him..." Dazai choked out, his eyes locking with his son in the corner.

"Took you all long enough to show up, thought you guys were detectives. He was becoming a pain in my ass, constantly crying, asking for his mommy and daddy and his Fuwa." The man chuckled as he cocked the gun back and pointed it back at your son. "Do you know why I'm doing this? Do you know?!" The guy shouted and Kazue cried out, his arms outstretched for Dazai.

He felt like he was going to collapse, the room was spinning, he had to compose himself though, he had to stay focused. He looked to Kunikida and Atsushi, hoping the plan would work out how they had said.

Kunikida quickly bent down and grabbed his gun off the floor, firing one shot at the arm of the man, making him drop the gun. Kazue let out a shrill scream and Dazai took this moment to run over and scoop him up off the floor, holding him close against his chest. The other three ran over to the man, Atsushi and Kunikida pinned him down on the ground as Ranpo cuffed his arms behind his back.

After the police took the man away they all made their way back to the Agency building, Dazai was in the back of the car holding Kazue on his lap, rocking him back and forth as his son fell asleep in his arms. The man had been one of the criminals they had captured before Kazue was even born. He had held an entire bank and its customers hostage, but had never actually killed someone, so he was let out on good behavior recently. He had been stalking Dazai, and he found out about you and Kazue and decided that he would have his revenge for the Agency ruining his life. None of them ever found out if the man would have actually hurt Kazue, and honestly, they didn't want to know, they were all just happy that he was unharmed.

When they walked through the door and you saw Kazue being cradled in Dazais arms you fell to your knees and cried. Tanizaki and Yosano had to help you stand up, and as soon as you found your footing you ran over to Dazai. "Hi Momma!"

Dazai now sternly enforced the stroller rule, he didn't want to go through anything like that ever again.

Chuuya Nakahara

Asa was his princess and you were his queen. But his daughter, oof, if anyone even looked at his daughter wrong for crying he would kill someone. Do not test Chuuya when it comes to his child. He would kiss the ground that she crawls on, he loves her so much.

If you didn't know any better, you'd think his office was a shrine dedicated to her and you. There were framed pictures of you and her, and sometimes the three of you hung on his wall, propped up on his desk and coffee table, pretty much any surface that could have pictures, they were covered.

She had just celebrated her first birthday, she was learning how to walk which Chuuya would not shut up about. If there was ever a moment to talk about his daughter he would. The Mafia members had all learned to just deal with it, knowing that if they looked agitated about the constant talk of his daughter they would either be demoted or have their asses kicked.

"Does she really have to start sleeping in her own room? She's got a crib in our room, I don't see the problem." Chuuya whispered to you from the couch as you made your way into the room opposite of yours and his. She had an entire nursery that was practically unused due to protective parenting. He really didn't see a reason in having her in a completely different room when it was so much easier to have her in yours and his room. If she woke up, he could get her immediately and get her back to sleep in the bed between the two of you.

When you came out of the bedroom you sat with him on the couch, his arm habitually wrapping around your shoulder and pulling you closer. He turned down the television so he could hear the monitor clearly. "If she gets too used to sleeping with us in our room, she'll never want to sleep in her own room. She's not that much further. You're spoiling her, honey." He groaned and you stifled your laughter, propping yourself up to press a quick peck to his cheek. "We should try to get some rest while she's sleeping. Come on."

The two of you laid in your bed, he held you close against his chest while you traced hearts against his bare chest with your finger. "I don't know why she has to sleep in her own room now though. She's only a year old. She's still my baby. I feel better having her close." He sighed, adjusting his free hand behind his head as he turned to look over at the video monitor, the corner of his lips twitching up slightly as he watched his daughter sleep peacefully in her crib.

"You're scared of her growing up. She's turned you into a big softy. You know, she's gonna keep growing."

"Don't say that. She's only one." He pulled his arm out from underneath you and ran his hands over his face. He hated thinking of her getting bigger, growing older. The thought of her not being the adorable, babbling baby that waddled over to the door whenever he walked in with open arms was enough to make him almost cry. ALMOST.

"You know... we can have more..." You said almost too seductively as you peppered kisses across his shoulders. It was supposed to be a joke, but he didn't take it as such. He wouldn't mind one or two more little princesses or princes teetering around the house.

The two of you thoroughly tired each other out, the night seemed to be going perfectly. Asa hadn't woken up yet, and this was the first time the two of you had been able to be intimate in that way since she had reached the eight month mark. You fully blamed Chuuya for that though, he had spoiled her so much, but he didn't seem to mind it at the time. Now he seemed to be convinced that having her in a separate room wasn't such a bad thing.

Everything was silent, the only sound was the crickets chirping outside and the occasional sound of a car passing by in the distance. That would shortly come to an end though, the sound of glass breaking and Asa's blood curdling scream coming from both the monitor and the room across the hall had jolted you and Chuuya from your peaceful slumber. You grabbed the monitor off the nightstand and Chuuya ordered you to stay in bed as he ran out of the room and into Asa's room. You knew though, it was too late as you saw the cloaked man who was holding your daughter jump out of the window just as the door flew open and Chuuya came into view on the screen.

"NO! Son of a BITCH!" His screeching voice was just as loud as your daughters cries had been and you dropped the monitor into your lap on the bed as the realization hit you. This wouldn't have happened if you had just listened to Chuuya, if you had let her sleep in your bedroom as she always had. He ran back into the room, flicking the lights on as he went over to the closet and quickly got dressed.

"This... this is my fault... if I would have listened..." You said, not able to face your him at all. He turned to face you, sighing as he tried to calm his nerves. He was already fully dressed, ready to hunt down and murder the asshole who had the nerve to take HIS daughter. He made his way around the bed to the side you were on, grabbing your face in his hands and kissing you softly.

"Don't you even dare blame yourself. I'm gonna get her back. I need you to stay here though, I can't have you getting hurt." You knew what he meant. The way that he felt right now, this would probably turn into an all out war, and if you were in the wrong place at the wrong time you could end up injured. You nodded slowly, kissing him one last time before he ran out of the room and out the front door.

He barely gave the car time to start up before slamming his foot down on the gas pedal, peeling out of the parking spot and speeding down the street. His vision was blurry as the tears started to stream out of his eyes, he was only able to keep his composure long enough to hopefully make you feel better. Now that he was alone he had hurdled the thin line between lashing out and having a complete mental and emotional breakdown.

The only thing keeping him from getting into a severe car accident was knowing that he had to stay alive to save Asa. Although he couldn't see where he was going through his clouded vision, he had dedicated the route to muscle memory, and he could luckily see faint streaks of red and green lights indicating braking cars and traffic lights.

When he got to the headquarters he got some questionable stares from the guards, it was three o'clock in the morning, considerably late, or maybe early, to be coming into work. When they attempted to speak to him he couldn't even mumble out a "fuck off" through his sobs. He raced up the stairs, not having the patience to deal with waiting for the elevator to get him up to the floor he needed to be on.

He stormed into Mori's office, and, not unlike his boss, he found him sitting at his desk, his hands folded under his chin as he stared down at the papers in front of him. "They said you'd be on your way up. What's wrong Chuuya?" Mori asked, motioning to the armchair in front of his desk. Chuuya didn't want to sit though, so he strode over to the desk, slamming the note that had been left in Asa's room down in front of Mori. "What is this?" Mori asked, grabbing the note between his gloved fingers and unfolding it.

"He got my Asa. I'm gonna fucking kill him!" Chuuya screamed, remembering the words that had been carefully scripted out on the thick note paper.

"For the beautiful woman who was murdered by one of your own. I shall avenge her. An eye for an eye. -H"

He knew exactly who "H" was, and he knew exactly who the beautiful woman was that he was speaking of. What he didn't understand was why he would target his family, his daughter to get back at the Mafia for what had happened. Chuuya hadn't even taken part in the situation that had sparked this outcome, so it made absolutely no sense to him.

"Chuuya, you need to stay calm. Asa is loved dearly by everyone here, I will get together everyone needed to find her." Chuuya found his bosses strange sense of composure to be infuriatingly irritating.

"How could I possibly stay calm!?" Chuuya shouted, he wanted to lash out, he wanted to go off on someone, anyone.

"I would feel the same way if it was my darling Elise who had been taken." Mori said, but that was a mistake. Chuuya sighed, exasperated. He was pacing the floor, but when Mori had the audacity to utter those words, he punched the wall that he was closest to, leaving a large hole.

"She's your god damn ability! You wouldn't understand half of what I was feeling because this is my actual fucking DAUGHTER! So don't tell me I need to stay calm!" Chuuya screamed, the tears seemed to flow endlessly, staining his cheeks as they ran down to his chin, hanging on for only a second before splashing down onto the hard wood floors. Mori didn't argue back, he knew that Chuuya was emotionally unstable right now, so he just nodded in agreement.

"So what is it that you need me to do?" He asked, the phone already in his hand as his fingers hovered over the dial.

"Get everyone here..." Chuuya muttered before finally crashing down in the armchair. His sobs had eventually become choked off, and he was left shaking in the chair, his arms wrapped tightly around his chest as he tried to hold himself together.

Everyone had filed into the office, some of them looked agitated, others looked tired and pissed off that they had been woken up, but when they saw Chuuya's current state they knew that something was wrong. His usual smug, cocky smirk seemed to have been erased, the only emotion that was left to be read on his face was pain.

Chuuya didn't need to say much, no one needed a thorough explanation to jump into action. Asa was the one beacon of light that graced the walls of the Mafia headquarters whenever Chuuya brought her in. She had even managed to make Akutagawa crack a small smile when she had burped in Chuuya's face and then spit up on his freshly laundered coat.

Around five o'clock in the morning he got a call from you. He answered it quickly, and it broke his heart to hear how distraught you were. "H-Hi honey... It's almost time for her bottle. She'll need to eat soon, and she'll need to be changed, and and and... god, please tell me you've found her..." You were a mess, and he could only imagine how much harder it was for you to be there in your home, surrounded by all of her things but not her.

"Not yet... but I swear, I'm gonna bring her home to you, okay? Trust me." He needed you to trust him, because right now all hope seemed lost. There was no possible leads as to where the jackass could be keeping her, nobody knew where to find the guy.

"It's... It's so quiet... please bring her home." You whispered out between broken sobs, he heard you try to swallow back the lump that had been building in your throat. He could only nod, giving you a small hum as an answer.

After you had hung up, whispering out a solemn "I love you." Before ending the call he was right back at it. He was dead set on catching this guy today. Not only had he stolen away his daughter, but he had destroyed his wife, his love... This man had crossed a line and he was going to pay for it.

"Oi, Chuuya. Look, at the bottom of the note." Tachihara said, he had the note close up to his face, his eyes squinting as he focused on the tiny scrawling at the bottom of the page. Chuuya ran over and snatched the paper out of his hands, walking over to the large window to try to shine some light onto the paper and see the writing clearer.

"For fucks sake, they're coordinates! They were here the entire time!" Chuuya was seething now, this must have been a sick game to that man. Chuuya grabbed his coat off the back of the chair and headed for the door, but he was stopped by Mori who placed a hand on his chest.

"This might be a trap, how do you know it's not?" Mori said and there was a soft murmur of agreement from the group of people that were standing around.

"Does it matter!? She could be there and that's all that matters!" Chuuya screamed, the tears that threatened to spill were stinging his eyes. The fact that they thought he cared about his own safety as this moment was almost laughable, he would have laughed if his throat didn't feel like it was closing in on itself. "If you're so fucking worried than I'll take Akutagawa..." This is all his fault anyway, isn't it? Akutagawa was the one who had murdered the woman who he was avenging, so he might as well come along.

Chuuya pulled the coordinates up on his phone and it pinpointed a building that seemed on the map to be rundown and abandoned. A princess like Asa didn't belong in a place like that, it made him sick to even imagine his beautiful, precious daughter in such a desolate area. He growled as the directions read that it would take an hour and a half, maybe two hours to get there.

He would make it in half the time though. He could give a shit less about traffic rules, and if the cops even dared to try to stop him on his mission, the wrath of Hell and Chuuya would be brought down upon them. He sped down the streets, winding through traffic like it was nothing. He didn't speak a word to Akutagawa, and Akutagawa knew not to talk to him right now either. Chuuyas mind was a frenzy, a whirlwind of emotions. A mixture of anger, depression, rage, and heartache, and all of those emotions were just simmering.

The devil himself wouldn't be able to stomach what Chuuya planned on doing to the man who took his daughter from him.

He made it there in record time, the drive only took fifty five minutes, an hour tops to get there. The entire drive, Chuuya's eyes would glance in the windshield mirror, looking back at the empty car seat, hoping that it would soon be filled with his perfect little bundle of joy to be brought home.

Chuuya kicked the door in and his eyes immediately zeroed in on the trail of blood droplets on the floor. His heart sank while his stomach rose, he tried to control his dry heaving as horrid images and scenes filled his mind. "Remember his ability, it uses blood." Akutagawa said sternly, trying to keep Chuuya from losing it completely already.

They followed the trail up a case of stairs that seemed like a safety hazard, and Chuuya hated to think that his daughter was in this place at all. It wasn't safe enough for her to be in, she could get hurt at any point. This place needed to be demolished as soon as he got her out of here. He would do it himself if the city didn't want to.

The blood stopped in front of a door, and as soon as Chuuya heard the soft whimpering of his daughter behind the door he kicked it in. She was sitting in a small dingy playpen in the corner of the room, and Akutagawa had to hold Chuuya back to keep him from running straight for her.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!? SHE'S RIGHT THERE!" Chuuya shouted, alerting his daughter to his presence. She pulled herself up on the rails of the playpen, stomping her feet to show him that she was becoming impatient.

"This might be the trap. We need to be careful." Akutagawa hissed, and Chuuya knew he was right. He sighed and peaked into the room, scanning it entirely to make sure it was empty before stepping in. Akutagawa followed close behind, Rashomon creating a shield around himself and Chuuya as they made their way over to Asa.

As soon as Chuuya got close enough he pulled her out of the playpen, holding her tight against his chest. He breathed her in, finding instant comfort in the smell of the all too familiar baby lotion and lavender shampoo that you used for her nightly baths. "I'm so sorry to have kept you waiting, princess. My beautiful baby girl, daddy loves you so much." He cooed to her, but just as things seemed to be going flawlessly, a loud scream escaped her tiny rose petal lips.

A hail of what seemed like bullets were fired across the room, and one of them managed to hit her leg. Chuuya held onto his composure long enough to check her leg, it had just skimmed by, but it was enough to make her bleed and to make her cry. He was trembling, all of his emotions had formed into one cluster fuck of pure, unfiltered rage. He passed Asa over to Akutagawa and ordered him to leave the room through his teeth. Akutagawa didn't bother to argue, instead wrapping Rashomon around himself and Asa completely and running out of the room and down the stairs.

Chuuyas teeth were barred as the man stepped out from the darkest shadow of the room. He didn't have time to speak before Chuuya charged at him, tackling him to the ground and pummeling him with his bare hands, the force of his ability behind each and every punch would leave the man unrecognizable. He was going to kill him, he wanted to kill him, but the vibration of his phone in his pocket made him stop. He pulled his phone out and when he saw it was you it brought him back to reality, the reality that his daughter was waiting for him, and you were still at home waiting for him to bring her home.

He answered it, holding his phone between his ear and shoulder as he wiped the blood of the man off his hands. "Did you find her? Tell me you found her!" Your voice was hoarse, he knew that you hadn't stopped crying. He couldn't keep you waiting any longer, you deserved to hold Asa in your arms as well.

"We'll be home in an hour or two." He said, and it felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off his shoulders when he heard your sigh of relief at his words.

Two Months Later

Chuuya was propped up on the floor, his head resting in his open palm as he bounced Asa's plush horse across the floor, making the horse noises as he did so. The sound of Asa's laughter was music to his ears, and her wide smile was just as beautiful as she flaunted her newly sprouted bottom two teeth. She crawled across the floor towards Chuuya who quickly lifted her up in the air. "Airplane Asa coming in for the landing!" He said playfully as he lowered her down to her his face and pressed a quick kiss to her nose.

His head shot up as he heard the bedroom door open. You had your hands behind your back, and the wide smile that spread across your face when you saw him made his heart flutter. He sat up, his back against the couch now, Asa on his lap attempting to imitate her fathers horse sounds as she bounced the plush horse across her lap. "What's up, baby?" Chuuya asked, wondering what could possibly be behind your back.

You moved your hands to the front, holding the white stick between two fingers and smiling down at him. "Congratulations, daddy."

a/n : I hope you enjoyed my first request after my ridiculously long hiatus. Again, I apologize for being gone so long, but I can't wait to start working on all the requests that are in my inbox. I love you all!

[writing-radionoises]

attraction

ship: shin soukoku / akuatsu, kunikidazai 

genre: slow burn romance

prompt: akutagawa is pining and has no idea what to do about it

notes: ada akutagawa, sequel to satisfaction 

It’s been at least a month since the announcement of Dazai and Kunikida’s wedding, a month since Ryunosuke left that dreaded anonymous love letter on Atsushi’s desk.

And yet, Atsushi has not figured out who wrote the love letter. Or maybe he did, and Akutagawa just didn’t know, or maybe Atsushi is even avoiding him…

God knows, all Akutagawa knows is that he’s locked in the bathroom on his former mentor’s wedding day while Atsushi bangs on the door.

“Ryunosuke, you are coming to the wedding, you fucking lawnmower!” He yells from outside.

Akutagawa puts his head into his hands. He’s ready, he changed up his normal top to a short sleeve white blouse without ruffles, it revealed all his scars and bruises, but it was a cute top that Atsushi picked out. Atsushi even tied his tie, fixed his hair, and everything, but here he was, insecure once again.

“He probably doesn’t even want me there…” Akutagawa responded from the bathroom.

“Then why would Dazai-san invite you?” Kyouka said from outside the bathroom, her tone much softer than Atsushi’s.

Ryunosuke had actually forgotten she was there…

Atsushi sighed, “Even if he didn’t want you at his wedding, which he does, I would want you there. Ryuu-san, pleeease!”

… The truth is, Akutagawa could never say no to Atsushi, especially when Atsushi uses his personal nickname for Akutagawa.

The sound of it alone brings color to Akutagawa’s sickly pale face.

“... Okay,” Akutagawa hesitantly agrees, fixing the little cat hair clip in his hair before unlocking the door to the bathroom and opening it.

Atsushi is in a similar outfit to his agency wear, a short sleeve white button up with the addition of a bowtie instead of a typical tie, as well as tan suspenders instead of black.

Kyouka, on the other hand, is wearing something a little more fancy than Akutagawa and Nakajima, simply because she’s the flower girl. Her dress is a tank top, knee length white dress with a dark blue lace collar, a dark blue ribbon around her waist as well. Atsushi has placed a flower crown of blue hydrangeas on her head, as well.

… She’s quite adorable.

“Are we ready to go?” Kyouka asks.

The trio leave the apartment, and make their way towards Fukuzawa’s house.

--

It’s awkward. It’s horribly awkward for Akutagawa. It’s such a small wedding, it’s really only the agency there, with the addition of some guild members, Gin, Higuchi, and a small appearance from Chuuya before he quickly leaves.

Akutagawa had never felt so much relief seeing Chuuya leave.

He ends up sitting next to his sister and Higuchi, Gin wearing a dress Akutagawa had bought her for her sixteenth birthday a few months ago, and Higuchi wearing a simple suit as they watch Kunikida and Dazai.

Fukuzawa got ordained specifically for this wedding, and probably only this wedding. So, up at the altar are Fukuzawa, Dazai, Kunikida, Atsushi, and Ranpo.

There wasn’t a need for a whole set of groom’s men, so the two best men were picked out and left at that.

… Akutagawa found it hard to look at anything but Atsushi. Looking at anybody else made him feel awkward and out of place.

… But Atsushi was a safe ground, the reason Akutagawa went to this event in the first place.

If it was hard to not look at Atsushi, it was even more difficult to not imagine being up at the altar with him. Declaring vows, holding hands, kissing… It made Ryunosuke giddy, feeling his face heat up.

Kyouka poked fun at him earlier about it, saying that him and Atsushi were probably going to be married next.

It’d be so nice… Akutagawa thought, But I don’t think he thinks of me in that way.

Pining is awful, so Akutagawa has discovered. It’s fucking painful.

When the reception starts, Akutagawa makes a run to the bathroom and locks himself in a stall for at least 30 minutes.

He washes his hands and hand at least ten times, as if trying to wash away the thoughts of Atsushi.

They don’t leave.

--

Akutagawa is sitting at a table at the reception awkwardly, watching Kyouka and Atsushi dance from a distance with some others when Dazai approaches, taking a seat beside Akutagawa.

“You don’t look like you’re having a lot of fun, huh?” Dazai starts.

“... I’m having a hard time with feelings, but congratulations on your marriage. Please don’t let my feelings concern you,” Ryunosuke replied, looking back over at Dazai, “It’s supposed to be a happy day for you.”

Dazai smiles a bit, shaking his head. His attire isn’t much different outside of the flowers in his hair, and a new brooch on his chest. His coat has been forsaken somewhere, probably Kunikida’s car.

“Thank you, but your feelings won’t upset me. I know they don’t have a whole ton to do with me,” answered the brunette, “Your feelings have to do with the kitty cat over there, huh?”

Ryunosuke blushed, looking away from Dazai, “Don’t tell him.”

Dazai lets out a fake gasp, putting a hand to his chest, “Ah, I would never! For this is a Romeo And Juliet tale, a beautiful romance written by Shakespear himself! And yet, I am just a supporting character for sir Romeo.”

“If it wasn’t your wedding day, I would kick your ass.”

Dazai chuckles, “You should, anyway. But anyways, I hope things go well for you, blah, blah, blah, all the other shit you’ve probably already heard. You need anything?”

Akutagawa fell silent, shrugging as he looked back at Atsushi, smiling and laughing with Junichiro.

“I think I know what you need,” Dazai responds, standing up from his seat as he holds his arms out to Akutagawa, “A good, old fashion Dazai hug!” Akutagawa smiles a bit as he stands up, taking the hug from Dazai as he rests his head on his former mentor’s shoulder.

… Dazai’s hugs aren’t nearly as nice as Atsushi’s, but it feels nice to finally get attention from Dazai after all these years.

--

Fuck it, tiger lilies, Akutagawa thought, quickly pointing to them on the menu for the cashier to place the order. He paid for the flowers, and was given a date to pick up the flowers as Akutagawa left the flower shop, pulling out his phone and beginning to dial a familiar number.

“Kunikida Doppo speaking, what can I do for you?”

“How did you tell Dazai-san you liked him?

Kunikida sighed from the other end of the phone while Akutagawa starts his walk down to the train station, “Not even a hello?”

“Hello, Kunikida, how did you tell Dazai-san you liked him?” Ryunosuke quickly rephrased.

“Well, it’s difficult to say because I truly didn’t end up telling him.”

“So he was the one who confessed?” “In a way, yes. We are talking about Osamu here, he already figured out that I loved him through his connections to just about everyone in Yokohama. So what happened was Osamu invited me to dinner, told me he knew about my feelings, and that he returned them. We started dating shortly afterwards,” Kunikida explained.

“Ah, you had it easy... “ Akutagawa replied, nervously tapping his fingers on his knee, “... I can’t seem to get my love interest to pick up on my feelings. They’re oblivious.”

“Hmm, you’re in a tough spot, then.”

“I don’t know who to go to anymore… I’ve spoken to Dazai-san, Higuchi, my sister, now you…” Akutagawa sighed, “It seems like no matter what, they can’t seem to figure it out, and I don’t want to be super blunt about it either… That’s just embarrassing.”

Kunikida fell silent, “I have an idea. To understand someone who is oblivious, you should talk to someone who was oblivious. You should talk to Poe, Ranpo’s boyfriend, they were in a similar situation. Poe might be able to give you some advice.”

Akutagawa smiles a bit as his train arrives to get back to the agency, “Thank you, Kunikida, I’ll get to it. I have to go, have a good afternoon.”

--

“Jinko, please think about this for more than five seconds. Please,” Ryunosuke says sadly, watching Atsushi pause from walking into their shared kitchen with the tiger lillies Akutagawa had just bought for him.

Atsushi turns back to him, “Think about what?”

Ryunosuke feels himself freeze up, trying to quickly come up with a response before eventually stuttering something out, “N, nevermind. Don’t think about it.”

Atsushi gives him a strange look, and then shrugs as he goes to put the flowers in the vase, and Ryunosuke goes to make some tea. His heart aches as Akutagawa pulls down a tea bag, then coughing into his hand.

“You look upset,” Atsushi comments, standing besides Akutagawa. Akutagawa hadn’t even noticed that his face was scrunched up into something of hurt. It’s understandable, but now was not a good time for that.

“... Do you have any idea how long I’ve been trying to tell you this? You just keep brushing me off, if you don’t like me, please just say it,” he replied, the words fell out of his mouth without a thought. The moment he said it, Ryunosuke felt a wave of regret wash over him as he quickly tried to distract himself, continuing to make his tea.

There’s a moment of silence. Akutagawa can’t bear to even look at Atsushi, so scared of his response, scared to burst into tears just by looking at the other.

“... Ryunosuke. I like you a lot, you are my very best friend. I don’t know what you’re trying to say, though, and I can tell it’s hurting you,” Atsushi replied, his voice is calm and full of worry, “What are you trying to say?”

“Think about it. Just… Think about it, please, Atsushi. I’ve been so obvious, practically the whole agency knows,” Akutagawa pauses to rub his eyes on his sleeve.

Atsushi reaches out and places a hand on Akutagawa’s shoulder, spinning his friend around to look at him. Akutagawa’s eyes are watering as he holds his entire cup in his hand, then setting the cup down on the counter.

“Do you just… Not get it? What else do I have to do? Jinko, this is fucking ridiculous, we’ve been doing this for months now. Are you really this dense?” Ryunosuke said, to which Atsushi fell silent, not responding.

Akutagawa didn’t know what to say, just staring intently at Atsushi with his heart pounding when Atsushi reached out for Akutagawa, cupping his face in his hands and bringing their lips towards in a swift motion.

Ryunosuke is left in shock for a moment, he had never really kissed someone before. Higuchi kissed his cheek once, though that might be the most he’s ever gotten.

… Regardless, it’s nice. Akutagawa quickly relaxes against Atsushi, moving his hand over the one Atsushi has on his face.

And when Atsushi pulls away, Akutagawa has to resist from pulling him back into the kiss. Atsushi smiles at Akutagawa, he is still holding the other’s hand as he speaks.

“Was I right?”

Ryunosuke nodded, “Yes, you were.”

“I didn’t think you actually liked me back,” replied Atsushi.

“... Please say you’re joking.”

“I wish I was.”

Akutagawa chuckles, hiding his smile behind his hand, “Jinko, you are dense.”

Atsushi smiles once again as he pulls the other into a hug, “Yup!”

… They are not going to hear the end of this from Dazai.

[astxlphe]

Thank you, With Love

(@bsd-rarepair-valentines-week​)

Day 1 / Bouquet // AkuHigu 

Higuchi finds flowers on her desk several mornings in a row.

General warning: a bit of violence and talking about killing people. That’s it.

(Uhh, first time writing that ship, i hope it’s fine...)

When Ichiyo arrived at the office on the first morning, she found Gin and Tachihara gathered around her desk, whispering between themselves.  

“What’s going on?” she asked, making her way towards them.  

Silence.  

It was Gin who spoke up first, looking back at her.  

“Is it your birthday?” Months ago, Ichiyo wouldn’t even have picked up on it, but Gin sounded put off, in a “it’s your birthday and you didn’t tell me” way.  

Oh dear, they were starting to become friends.  

“Well, no.” She frowned, and supplied helpfully: “It’s in May. Why?”  

All three of them were still looking at her as they moved away from her desk, and Ichiyo gaped.  

On her desk sat a large bouquet of flowers, carefully wrapped in soft green paper.  

“We checked it,” Tachihara said. “It’s not a bomb or anything like that. It’s just...” he shrugged. “...a bunch of flowers.”  

“Is there a note?” Ichiyo asked, picking the bouquet. She checked the inside, between the flowers, but there didn’t seem to be one. “That’s strange. Who could have put that here?”  

“Thank you gift?” Gin suggested.  

“I wouldn’t know what for... Besides, how would they get that in Headquarters?”  

She tried to remember if she had helped someone recently – someone who knew to find her here — but nothing came to mind.

Either way, she didn’t have time to think too deeply on it. As touched as she was with the gesture, she had work to do.  

Hirotsu gave a voice to her thoughts. “All of you should stop behaving like gossiping teenagers,” he told them. “Akutagawa will soon be back with the boss’ orders, we must be ready to head out as soon as he arrives. As for this—” He looked pointedly at the bouquet. “While this may be a harmless gift, I strongly suggest we keep a better eye out of what enters this office.”  

They dispersed, sheepishly obeying the older man. Ichiyo found a vase in the kitchen, and put the bouquet on the corner of her desk.  

When Akutagawa came back, he filed them in on the mission, not even taking note of the flowers — if he even had noticed them in the first place — and everyone put it out of their mind.  

That was the end of it.  

+

It should have been the end of it.  

Well, it wasn’t, because the next day, when Ichiyo came in again, there was another bouquet on her desk.  

She looked around. She had decided to come in early to finish so the previous day’s mission’s property damage report— they had to keep the legal businesses on their territory safe and repair them when needed, that was the deal — so the office was empty.  

Checking the flowers, she found, once again, no deadly trap and no note.  

Nevertheless, this was highly suspicious. Those flowers couldn’t come out of nowhere. Someone had to drop them here, and this someone could do it during the night or early enough in the morning that no one had arrived yet.  

She reviewed, in her mind, who could do such a thing. The boss and, of course, all the executives, had access to their offices, but she couldn’t imagine any of them leaving flowers on her desk.  

And two days in a row?  

Apart from Kouyou, who always seemed like the most likely of the bunch to get someone a gift, but Ichiyo didn’t know Kouyou very well, and only had very few conversations with her — all work related. She was still horribly intimating and always left her shaking in her metaphorical boots.  

There was also Chuuya, the executive who visited their office the most, usually to try and coax Akutagawa into having a meal other than a salad.  

Maybe she could ask them... but she didn’t want to make a fuss about something like flowers. What kind of Mafia operative would she be if she got worried about flowers?  

Was it even the same person both times?  

So, she sighed and went looking for something to put them on. She miraculously found another vase in the kitchen, and put the flowers on her desk, on the other side of the first bouquet.  

They didn’t have a lot of decorations in their office, so the flowers embellished the room quite nicely. Both bouquets also fit well next to one another, and it was starting to give the room a nice scent.  

When the others arrived, she was deep into her paperwork.  

“Another?” Gin asked.  

“Yes!” She smiled awkwardly. “I still don’t know who sent them, though.” She ran a finger on a flower's petals. “They’re beautiful.”  

“You did not see who delivered them?”  

“No, they were already here when I arrived. I’ll ask at the reception if they saw something when I go home tonight.” She smiled at Hirotsu, noting his grave expression. “I wouldn’t worry so much, it’s only flowers.”  

“Did you make sure they weren't trapped?” Akutagawa asked.  

“O-Of course!” Her face flushed red. “No bomb, no gas, no wiretap. They’re real flowers too.”  

He nodded, and went back to work.  

The flowers stayed on her desk through the whole day.  

+

“I believe,” Hirotsu said on the third day, starring at yet another bouquet of flower in Higuchi’s hands, “that Higuchi has gained a secret admirer.”  

“Eh?” She put the bouquets back on the desk quickly and turned to Hirotsu, face turning a bright red. “A- a secret admirer?”  

Tachihara laughed. “And you call us gossiping teenagers?”  

Hirotsu send him a look, and Tachihara’s laugh died down immediately.  

“Probably Mafia too,” Gin guessed, “or they wouldn’t have been able to get in.”  

She could never have an admirer — she was, after all, hopeless, as her sister liked to say, and well aware that any reputation and authority she might have stemmed from Akutagawa’s own. She couldn’t see why anyone in the Mafia would see her as worthy of admiration.  

“Did you talk to the reception?”  

“They say they haven’t seen anything, or anyone, carrying flowers inside the building. At least not during their working hours.” Which didn’t mean much, because the reception was closed during the night and you could only get in with a key card.  

So, as always, she found a place to put the bouquet — on one of their shelves, used to file a copy of their reports.  

A cough sounded from behind as she set it down. “Are you going to leave it there?” Akutagawa asked, and for a short moment Ichiyo thought he might disapprove.  

“Well, we don’t have any more vases,” she explained quickly, feeling a bit embarrassed — she didn’t want all that "secret admirer” business to bother anyone, especially not her actual crush. “I don’t really know where else to put it — we’ll have to wait until one of the other bouquets wilts...”  

“We could get a new one. Some cheap ones are nice.”  

She glanced at her desk, where the first bouquet she had gotten, full of soft looking white flowers, would soon start dying.  

It would be a shame; they were absolutely gorgeous.  

“Do you like them?”  

“Uh?” That was the last question she expected, and it left her speechless for a few seconds. “I mean, y-yes of course! I love flowers, but those...” She blushed, and rubbed the back of her head. “Someone thought I deserved them and I’m—” She sniffed, and hoped she wouldn’t start crying over something like this in front of him. “You know. It makes me happy?”  

“I see.”  

He looked deep in thought, frowning. Maybe he thought he deserved flowers too?  

“Do you want me to buy you flowers, senpai?”  

It snapped him back into reality. “Absolutely not.”  

+

Ichiyo gulped, staring at the potted flowers sitting on her desk.  

“We don’t have any more vases.”  

There had been nobody else besides the five of them in the room, so no one else could have heard her say this, or even known she didn’t know where to put the flowers anymore.  

Whoever gifted her those flowers was someone within their office. It could only be one of four people — Gin, Tachihara, Hirotsu, or Akutagawa.  

She fantasized, for a minute, of Akutagawa buying her flowers. She giggled at herself — what a cute, romantic move it would be.  

But he wasn’t one for affectionate gestures — though she had seen him fix Gin's hair once, after a rough fight, when he thought nobody was looking.    

So that left Gin, Hirotsu and Tachihara.  

Uh.  

She couldn’t really see any of them buying her flowers either.  

Now by habit, she slipped her fingers in between the flowers and on the paper packaging the pot. Once again, no trap, but this time there was a small cardboard note, folded, written inside.  

“Water twice a week"  

It was printed, in a neat, flowery font. The note had no logo or no indication of who could have sent it. A small section had a message, but the signature had been left unfilled.  

“With love, from......”  

“With love,” she repeated quietly.  

She pulled the small card off the flowers and slipped it in her breast pocket with a smile.  

+

The smell of gunpowder hung heavily in the air, and Ichiyo stood still, her back on Akutagawa, her finger pressed on the trigger.  

“That’s the last of them,” she told him, and pushed her sunglasses back on her nose. “The place is ours.” She tilted her head, listening in her earbud as Tachihara laughed, gunshots echoing from far away. “The others are almost done as well.”  

This organization had believed they could settle on Mafia territory and start their own business there, hoping to slowly eat away the Port Mafia’s influence on the neighbourhood — their mistake.  

The boss had not liked their arrogance.  

“Good.” Rashomon comes to a rest, settling back into its coat form. He stares at the bodies they left in their wake, and his lips twitch into the only kind of smile Ichiyo has ever seen him make — more a grimace than a smile.  

“Let’s leave before the police starts getting curious.” He coughed. “The officers in the area are ours, but they will not be able to pretend nothing happened.”  

As he talked, Ichiyo couldn’t help but notice — soft cries of pain and twitchy movements. She blinked, surprised. Akutagawa did not usually leave any survivors.  

“Those are still alive.”  

“Leave them,” Akutagawa ordered. “The police will take care of them.”  

As he spoke, sirens starting sounding in the distance. Ichiyo’s earbud spluttered. “They’re already here,” she heard Gin say. “We will meet back at headquarters.”  

She relayed the message to Akutagawa, who nodded. “Come on,” he gestured for her to follow him. “Let’s get out of here.”  

They left, getting back to the car quickly. Akutagawa took the wheel and Ichiyo sat in the passenger seat. The adrenaline from the fight was dying down, allowing her to relax, and she felt a strange mix of nervous and giddy.  

She was alone , with Akutagawa . Maybe they could make small talk?  

“Senpai?” she tried.  

All the answer she got was an absentminded “uh?”  

“Can I...hum...ask you something?”  

She took his silence as an approval.  

“Why didn’t we kill them? Even with our people in the police—”  

“I can’t.”  

“Why not?”  

Her question resulted in a deep, angry scowl she’s learned to associate with the people he hated the most.  

“I promised. I made a deal with the weretiger.”  

The somewhat sweet if not oblivious young man who had helped her tail Gin once. He had seen her at her cry once, to her greatest embarrassment.  

And this person had somehow managed to convince Akutagawa to stop killing.  

“What did he do? Offered his own life in exchange?” she tried to joke.  

“He did, actually.”  

Why wasn’t she more surprised? Based on what little she knew about him; it was exactly something he would do. 

“And the boss agreed to this?” She doubted he had, but well. Mori had his eccentricities too.  

“No,” he said. “He isn’t aware of this.”  

“And you’re not going to tell him.”  

“What the boss doesn’t know won't kill him.” He paused. “Or me.”  

“I see.” Ichiyo bit her lip. “Does anyone else know?”  

“Only Gin, and she called me an idiot.” He looked put off at this, his expression almost identical to Gin’s when she’d thought she had missed her birthday.  

Still, she felt her heart swell — she was in on the secret, he had chosen to tell when he could have just told her to mind her own business. He trusted her.  

“I can do it for you, if you’d like? The killing, I mean. You just point me to the target and—”  

“Don’t bother.” He huffed. “That’s cheating. Just don’t let the boss know.”  

“I wouldn’t! You can count of me.”  

Akutagawa didn’t answer, and turned at the next corner instead. The car slowed down in front of the Mafia headquarters.  

+

She was attempting to write the report when Gin came in, holding a pot of flowers.  

“This,” Gin explained. “came in just before we left.”  She set it down on the desk. “It was left at the reception for you.”  

“Uh, thanks.”  

“It doesn’t seem to be slowing down,” she went on crossing her arms, eyebrows set into a frown.  

“I’m sorry.” Ichiyo sent her an apologetic smile. “I wish I knew who sent those...”  

“We can’t do anything about it.” Then muttered something under her breath she didn’t quite got — something that sounded like “idiot” and, she could guess, wasn’t directed at her — before leaving her to her work.  

Tachihara was, as usual, no help whatsoever, while Hirotsu diligently did his own paperwork. If things went as it generally did, he would threaten the younger commander into working within the hour.  

Curious, she took the time to look inside the flowers, thinking that maybe, after last time, there would be a note.  

She found it easily. It was the same kind of cardboard note, indicated to water the flowers once every two days. Inside was the flowery inscription: Thanks for everything, from.....  

As before, it had been left unfilled.  

It didn’t necessarily mean anything. It was only a default flower shop card, but there were always different choices and mystery person had picked those ones in particular.  

Thank you and With love.  

“Higuchi?”  

She almost jumped out of her skin as Akutagawa called out to her.  “Yes?” she squeaked out.  

“Have you seen Gin?”  

“Oh, she just left — I think the flowers are getting on her nerves.”  Her shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry.”  

“Don’t make useless apologies. You have done nothing wrong.”  

God, this man’s way with words.  

“Thank you,” she said anyway, and yawned. It had been a long day.  

His gaze caught on the flowers on her desk. Ichiyo wondered if it annoyed him too — but his face seemed to almost soften. “I’ll talk to her.”  

Before he left, he took a look at the she files on her desk. “Paperwork can wait,” he told her and disappeared in the corridor. “Get some sleep.”  

Once he was gone, Ichiyo leaned back on her chair. She should probably take a nap. They’d been running around all day, and it was a little over two in the morning. Akutagawa was right, the paperwork would have to wait for tomorrow.  

She pushed the papers back, gathered her things, and went home. She made sure not to make too much noise — her sister was asleep; she didn’t want to wake her up.  

+

Next morning, she woke up early to be able to finish the reporting before lunchtime. She left home before breakfast, deciding to take it at Headquarters.  

After parking her car, she started walking towards the building, when she stopped dead in her tracks.  

Right there, if she turned left directly instead of going forward, a little further down the street, was a flower shop.  

She’d never taken that street. She’d been around the neighborhood, obviously, but always the streets that sold lunch, or groceries. Or office supplies, when they had budget cuts and ran out of pens.  

On a whim, she took her left and reached the florist pretty quickly. The store name’s font matched the one on the card she’d found in the potted flowers.  

She hadn’t imagined the florist could be so close to her place of work. She looked through the large glass door, and realized it was open. Her watch showed 6:30am, extremely early for a florist to be opened.  

On the other hand, around the Mafia HQ, people kept strange hours.  

Then she spotted Akutagawa. Inside the flower shop.  

Eyes wide, she stood, watching in silence as he seemed to hesitate between a bouquet of roses and a pot it colorful pansies.  

She really liked roses.  

He picked the roses.  

Maybe they were for Gin?  

After paying, he moved towards the door and froze when he saw her. His lips moved, mouthing a swear word as he realized he had nowhere to run.  

His face went red and, as soon as was outside, he shoved her the roses in her arms and tried to escape.  

Definitely not for Gin.  

“Wait!” She managed to get a hold of his sleeve. “Senpai, have you been the one— the flowers?”  

He nodded briskly. “I just wanted you to know that I...” He seemed to have trouble finding the right words. “Appreciate,” he ended up saying. “I appreciate you, and your work. You always have my back, even though I’m not—” He grimaced. “I believed this would get the message across better than I could. Don’t make a fuss about it.”  

With love, the note had said.  

“But I—” For all her fantasies for Akutagawa offering her flowers, she had never considered what she would do or say if it actually happened.  Her eyes watered and she gulped, trying to fight back a sob. “It’s just my job and I—”  

“Are you crying.”  

“No!”  

“Stop crying!”  

“I can’t, I’m sorry!” She rubbed her eyes to get rid of the tears. “I’m just so happy!”  

“What about?”  

“You! And the flowers! And the—”  

Thank you, with love.  

Akutagawa didn’t answer, but he fumbled with his pocket and pulled out a packet of tissues, which he pushed in her hands. “I didn’t want to — I didn’t mean to—”  

She blew her nose ungracefully. “Thank you.” She sniffed. “I didn’t mean to get so emotional over this.”  

“No trouble. I’m…glad you like them.” He stood there, quiet, for a few seconds, staring resolutely at the flowers. “Would you like to—” he hesitated. "You are free tomorrow night.”  

It took her a second to know whether it was a question or an order.  

“Yes?”  

“Good. Let's have dinner?”  

“I—” She couldn’t speak. She had to be dreaming, or something would go horribly wrong in the minute. This was everything she had wished for since meeting him and it couldn’t simply happen. She hadn’t done anything to deserve that and yet... “Just the two of us?”  

He acquiesced, and she smiled, feeling herself tear up again.  

“I would love to!”  

“Please don’t cry again.”  

“It’s too late! I’m so sorry!”

[cheetahleopard]

Hello! I made a 25 songs-long playlist of soukoku songs! It tracks the progression of their dynamic in the fic I have planned! See below the cut for the song list in order and the reason for their placement~ Feel free to send in asks about the fic, this playlist mostly tracks Chuuya’s perspective

Thank God That I’m Not You- The Himalayas 

 “I'm such a sinner/Yeah have been since birth/...But I could be so much worse/Oooo oooo/Thank God I'm not you” Young Soukoku’s feelings about each other

Worst in Me- Unlike Pluto

“Playing games from the start/Sinking your nails in my heart/You bring out the worst in me/Nothing, no nothing can change you/I decided to play when I knew you were fire” Chuuya’s view of Dazai as they grow

Devil’s Backbone- The Civil Wars

“Don't care if he's guilty, don't care if he's not/He's good and he's bad and he's all that I've got/Oh Lord, Oh Lord, I'm begging you please/Don't take that sinner from me” Dazai’s feelings when Chuuya is in the hospital after the first use of Corruption since Chuuya became Arahabaki- realizes he’s in love

I Feel Like I’m Drowning- Two Feet

“My life's okay/Just when you're not around me/My life's okay/I feel like I'm drowning/I'm drowning/You're holding me down” Chuuya pretending that life without Dazai is easier- the thought of Dazai holds him down

Dangerous (feat. Joywave)- Big Data

“You understand, I got a plan for us/I bet you didn't know that I was dangerous/It must be fate, I found a place for us/I bet you didn't know that someone could love you this much” Dazai’s thoughts after Chuuya fully recovers

Despicable- Grandson

“The goodbye is the hardest part/When we find ourselves back at the start/...One day you will understand/Why I pushed you away as I am/And you will find a better man than I am/Trust, I'm doing you a favor, doing you a favor” Dazai’s thoughts after Oda dies, about himself and his direction in life. A bit of foreshadowing of Chuuya later understanding he does better and is a better man w the ADA

Grenade- Bruno Mars

“Yes I would die for you, baby/But you won't do the same” Chuuya realizes Dazai left the mafia. Chuuya interprets that he cared for Oda more than he cared for Chuuya

I Feel Like I’m Drowning- Two Feet

“My life's okay/Just when you're not around me/My life's okay/I feel like I'm drowning/I'm drowning/You're holding me down” Chuuya pretending that life without Dazai is easier- the thought of Dazai holds him down

my boy- Billie Eilish

“My boy/Don't love me like he promised/...My boy/He ain't a man, and sure as hell ain't honest” Chuuya beginning to accept that Dazai betrayed them (he isn’t sure if “them” is the mafia or himself)

Every Lie- My Darkest Days

“Trying to undo the love that I'm tied to/Who haven't you lied to?” Chuuya trying to untangle his feelings about both Dazai and Dazai’s betrayal

Learning to Hate You as a Self-Defense Mechanism- Flatsound

“You were always a shitty friend/And you would leave when I got sick/You never called me on my birthday/I want to call you on your birthday/So I'll hold on to this feeling/I'll hold on to this hate/For as long as I need/For it to help me” Chuuya lying to himself about his true feelings about Dazai. He convinces himself he hates Dazai and throws himself whole-heartedly into the feeling

Wish You Never Met Me- Papa Roach

“I am just giving up us” Chuuya subconsciously crying over Dazai’s leaving and refusing to admit it because he wouldn’t miss Dazai, after all, he (convinced himself he) hated Dazai

State of My Head- Shinedown

“Oh, our flag is tattered/And our bones are shattered/But it doesn't matter/'Cause we're movin' forward” Chuuya continues moving forward and pushing himself even as it hurts

Gravity- Hollywood Undead

“I think of you now and then/The memories never end when/Gravity pulls you in/...Now I'm sitting, wishing that/Wishing I could just go back/I was happy with no fame” Chuuya starts flirting with using Corruption and just letting go.

Darkside- Shinedown

“Because you're in deep, resisting repeats/Face forward and don't come unhinged/I've got the actors and all these bastards/That took all the fun out of rage and revenge/Don't be so quick to judge, reign havok from above” Chuuya is at the point where he has to resist Corruption everytime he uses his gift, and it’s wearing on him

Bury Me Face Down- grandson

“I won't go quietly, I'm bringin' my crown/When I go into the ground/Oh, they gotta bury me, bury me face down” Chuuya fights and fights Corruption and now it seems that’s all he does

Best Friend to Enemy- 78rpm

“Best friend to enemy/That's what you are to me/...Used to speak ten times a day/Now I don't give a damn what you say/Everything said without a word” Chuuya finds out Dazai’s alive

I Hate Everything About You- Three Days Grace

“I hate/You hate/I hate/You love me/I hate everything about you/Why do I love you” Chuuya fights with the feelings he buried and never got over, especially after Dazai reveals he’s loved Chuuya all along

Very Good Bad Thing- Mother Mother

“Try to get out but we just keep stickin' around/Cuz it is a very good bad thing we've found.” Chuuya and Dazai talk- Chuuya finds that Dazai’s betrayal of the mafia changed him for the better

I Only Lie When I Love You- Royal Blood

“I only lie when I love you/I only crawl when I hit the ground” Chuuya fights against his love for Dazai returning- even as he can tell it’s a healthier love than before

I Almost Told You I Love You- Papa Roach

“I almost told you that I loved you/Thank God I didn't 'cause it would have been a lie” Chuuya’s feelings get stronger, and he nearly blurts out that he loves Dazai on a joint mission and he denies it in his head even more vehemently after that, even as he starts to accept it

Irresistible- temposhark

“Bad and wrong but love don't get any better/Dress undone you're still my favorite taboo, whoo-oo/You and me are irresistible/You and me are indestructible” Chuuya feels himself draw into the old patterns with Dazai- the banter and the feeling of working together... but he half-fears-half-anticipates it’ll turn into a toxic partnership again

Stripped- Depeche Mode

“Let me see you/Stripped down to the bone/Let me hear you/Make decisions” Chuuya and Dazai talk after Chuuya gives into new fears and old temptations and uses corruption before Dazai arrives at the scene. It’s a very deep talk about all of Chuuya’s fears, Dazai’s true feelings, and their formal confession.

Au Volant- Elsa & Emilie

“I got my mind set on the sunny place/Where we can rest our case/I got my mind set on the sunset/Where we can go and push reset/And call it off” Part of the conversation, where Dazai reminisces about how they used to be. How bad the environment was for him and how toxic their relationship would have been for them then.

Fool- Cavetown

“I am just a fool to keep on chasing after nothing great/You are just a fool to keep pretending that you're loving me/I don't know where I'm supposed to go” Part of the conversation, where Chuuya talks about how bad those in-between years were, how hard it was to keep corruption at bay

Feel Invincible- Skillet

“Hey, hey, hey when I need to be saved/You're making me strong, you're making me stand/Never will fall, never will end/Shot like a rocket up into the sky/Nothing could stop me tonight/You make me feel invincible” Chuuya and Dazai now know where they stand, and do their best to support each other, and doubleblack rises again, better than ever- and they’re proud to know that shin soukoku has grown as well

[no-longer-tainted]

WIP Week 2019 [Day 6]

Question: What is your favorite comment you’re received on any of your fan works (WIP or Complete)?

It’s not an actual comment or anything but I’m always happy if people like what I wrote specially for them! <3 I’m always super nervous about that ;w;

Your Most Popular WIP

Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs Shipping: Soukoku [Chuuya Nakahara x Osamu Dazai] Notes: My most popular online WIP is my School AU “Between Lies and Love” but offline it is the Civilian Chuuya x Mafia Boss Dazai AU. I once wrote a chapter 1 for the story I planned! [WIP: 18th Sep. 2018]

Shifting the two small bags from one hand to the other, Chuuya left the convenience store. He held his free hand in front of his face to protect it from the autumn sun shining right into his eyes. An old lady entered the shop while he stood in front of the entrance and he greeted her with a friendly smile. She responded with a nod and then she was out of sight. Starting his way home, he stepped forwards. Luckily the way was short, he would not even need ten minutes home, because he hated letting his daughter alone at home. 

Chuuya passed a few other stores and looked through the shop windows before he turned into a lost alleyway to shortcut his way home. The moment, he wanted to walk around the corner, to get back to the main street, Chuuya bumped against someone else. He stumbled a step backwards, his hand holding his hat and looked up. "I'm-", he wanted to apologize but he stopped when he felt the murderous glare on him. 

"Where are you looking, you bitch?" His gaze wandered over Chuuya and the man was at least two heads taller than him and behind him where two other guys with a similar building. All three were staring at Chuuya and then their eyes suddenly lightened up in a way, Chuuya couldn't describe, when they looked at each other. 

"Boss, I think he-" The only blond one under the men spoke up but before he could finish his sentence, he laid straight on the floor, a man with black hair and a completely black outfit standing him, pressing his face down on the street with his booted food. 

After that, another man appeared in the alleyway and looked around, seemingly to analyze the situation they were in. His hair was brown and he was wearing all black too. Then his gaze fell on Chuuya and a smile appeared on his face but that didn't quite catch his eye - the other one was covered under bandages. Chuuya looked straight back at him when the man started to speak with a really soft voice. "You should leave for the best." 

The man who arrived a few seconds before him grabbed his arm and wanted to pull him out of the alleyway but Chuuya snatched out of the grip. "He is right, leave this place." His voice sounded less patient with Chuuya and his glare was his dark eyes sent chills down his spine because he never saw someone looking so angry at him for literally no reason. 

"You two are pretty full of yourselves," Chuuya said and dodged a fist from the man he bumped into a few moments ago and with a smooth movement, he threw him over his shoulders, his bags clashing against his own body. "It's a three on three if I join you." He put the two groceries bag aside and rolled the sleeves of his sweatshirt jacket up like he was doing that as an everyday duty. 

The other two men of his spontaneous formed group are exchanging looks but the moment the brown-haired man shrugged his shoulders, the other one exhaled exasperated and rolled his eyes. He didn't seem amused about him joining the battle but the other man probably had the upper hand about decisions between them. 

It wasn't like the other three men gave them any other opportunities to discuss their further on-goings because the blond one, having now a bloody and bruised nose, attacked the black-haired man and was complaining about how he could dare to destroy his beautiful face and he would definitely pay for it.  

"Don't stay in the way, Chibi~" The brunette said, laying one hand on his shoulder. With a feathery jump and his hands in his pockets, he kicked the until now unharmed third man right into his face and tossed him against the wall. 

"Hah, as if!" Chuuya exclaimed and jumped over Dazai's shoulder by supporting himself on his shoulder with one arm and knocking out the one man he bumped into by kicking both of his feet in his face probably breaking one or two of his teeth. He himself landed elegantly like a kitten on his feed in a crouching position. Behind his back, the black-haired man punched the third one on the ground before he was able to attack Chuuya from behind. 

The one the bandaged man had kicked, got up from the ground and ran towards Chuuya and the other man. His attacks were easy to dodge for Chuuya but the other one got his fist right into his face. Chuuya snickered and let the enemy trip over his long leg. "So? Who's standing in the way, huh?" Chuuya teased him with a smirk on his face. 

"Don't be so cocky just because you broke a few teeth out of him," he answered and held his cheek with his hand. He rubbed over it and spout a few pained groans. "That was nothing."

Chuuya only shrugged his shoulders as an answer and turning his back to him. "You have to know." With fast movements, he ran towards one of the enemies and hit one of them with his fist. Through his blood ran only adrenaline at the moment - it almost felt like fighting back then in his High School days. "Look out!" 

Hearing the shouting of Mister Angry Boy, Chuuya turned around only to dodge a thrown brick last second. Though, Chuuya lost his momentum and fell backwards on his butt. "Ohw." He rubbed the aching area and with a back-flip, he got up from the dirty ground, dusting off his hands and pants. The bandaged man laughed. "Clumsy, aren't we?" 

A slight blush appeared on his cheeks and he clicked with his tongue. "At least I don't need ten kilometer bandages."

It took them a few more kicks and punches before these three idiots were beaten and weren't able to get up from the ground, groaning from pain of there broken bones. They looked miserable and a look on his watch told Chuuya, the fight didn't take long, just a few minutes. He dusted his clothes off and turned towards the other two. "Though-" He turned around to the place he expected his groceries to be but the bandaged man - with the black-haired man behind him - already gave him the bags. "Thank you." He took them with a huffy movement. "I'll have to go." 

Only turning around, when he felt the grip of the other man around his wrist. 

“What's your name?" 

Confused, Chuuya looked at him and raised an eyebrow at him and the smile irritated him even more. "Nakahara. Nakahara Chuuya," he introduced himself and when the grip around his wrist loosened, he let his arm sink down. It wouldn't hurt when these two men knew about his name, the chances that he would meet them again were pretty much against zero anyway. 

"It was nice to meet you, Chuuya~" The man said and the way he drew every single syllable of his name gave Chuuya goosebumps. "Right, Akutagawa-kun?" Akutagawa just glared at Chuuya and didn't respond in any way. 

"Yeah, yeah- whatever you say, Mister Bandage." Chuuya shook his head while rolling his eyes and was about to leave the alleyway. He had really no interest in getting caught by the police for the brawl and he left his daughter alone at home for more time than he was comfortable with. "I really have to leave, I hope you clean that shit up here." 

“We do." Akutagawa snapped and went to the dead looking bodies, kicking them with his feet like they were worthless trash. "There was no reason for you to interfere anyway." 

"It's not like I expect a thank you." Chuuya rolled his eyes and turned towards the bandaged man. "Just to make things complete. What's your name?", Chuuya asked a little curious which men chased through the town to beat a group of punks up. Of course, he was aware of his help without asking for any reasons but he didn't help especially them out rather he wouldn't come out without fighting. 

"Dazai," he answered and his lips still formed this stupid unreadable smile. 

"Then- whatever you do with them- Have fun?" Without waiting for an answer, Chuuya left the alleyway and sped his steps up to get home fast. He only went groceries shopping because he needed some stuff for his daughter otherwise he wouldn't even have left the apartment on his day off. 

It didn't take long until he was in his own four walls again and put away the things that survived the fight. A few things, like the eggs he bought for his dinner, didn't survive. After he had put the few things away, he walked into his daughter's small room. "Little princess, I'm home," he greeted her and listened. She was still asleep so Chuuya just walked in with the light of the hall to not wake her up. 

Her chubby, light red cheeks, the light orange hair, still thin and short. Her pink babygrow with cute sheep on it he bought for her first birthday a few weeks ago - all made her so adorable and Chuuya smiled at her. She was all the trouble worth. 

The growl of his stomach made Chuuya realize that he should eat something because he didn't eat since hours. A look on his phone told him it was dinner time anyway. He sighed, gave Aya a kiss on her forehead and left her room. It wouldn't take long until she would wake up to get her food too. 

On his way to the kitchen he answered a message from his friend Tachihara and in the kitchen he put on the playlist of his favorite rock band while doing dishes and turning on the rice cooker. After what had happened, Chuuya wasn't in the mood to cook so he would go simple with rice and stir-fried vegetables. 

The moment he put his plate down on the table, he heard Aya's cry. It took him only a few seconds to get next to her bed and take her out of it to comfort her. "Sssh- Everything is fine, little princess," he whispered while he rocked her in his arms. He hummed her favorite melody and until she calmed down. 

Aya grabbed Chuuya's longer hair strands with her short, thick fingers and put them into her mouth, drooling on them.

"They aren't food, Aya." Cautiously he put his hand around his own hair and freed it from the biting with her small baby teeth. "What does my little princess wish to eat?", he asked her and put his hair behind his shoulder before Aya was able to grab them again. As an answer, he only got cooing and giggling sounds. "So you want some vegetables from your papa?" When the little girl hid her face on Chuuya's neck, he put his hand in her hair and ruffled her short locks, smiling. 

With his daughter in his arms, Chuuya left the room and entered the kitchen. While his stomach growled for food, he put Aya in her high chair, belted her up and prepared some food she was able to eat with her fingers like she loved doing over the last two weeks. A lot of it landed on herself but it was a really cute picture when she grabbed the food and put it into her mouth while her eyes shone like the sun itself. Chuuya took a few photos of her with his phone before he started to eat next to her. 

If he overlooked the fight he had today, he really had a peaceful life he couldn't complain about. Of course, there was no place for a lot of luxury with having to take care of a one-year-old child and being a single-parent but he loved her with all he had and would give up everything for her.

[multiimuse]

strangefellows said to multiimuse :

💝 - chuuya (A memory that made them feel loved)  

Chuuya groans and settles back against the pillows propping him up on his couch, grey eyes narrowed in exhausted suspicion in the direction of his suite’s kitchen. He’d only been released back to his quarters that morning, following a stay in the infirmary after a mission that had gone spectacularly badly. They had still managed to achieve their objective, in the end --- it hadn’t gone so badly that they’d failed, but that’s the only good thing about that disaster. He doesn’t like thinking about it, and of course the last few minutes of it are vague anyway, as they always are after he has to unleash Corruption, but he doesn’t have to remember what went down to curse his damn cracked ribs or the twisted knee that he’d aggravated by moving around on.

He’s still exhausted, and if Ane-san were here she’d be angry at him for being out of bed, never mind that he’s been mostly sleeping even though he’s on his own couch. But he’s doing a little better this morning, especially after the nap he’s just been jarred awake from. He knows what woke him, too, and he reaches for the knife he keeps strapped to one leg in case of unexpected attacks only to find it gone. Oh. Well that tells him who’s in his kitchen, he thinks idly --- not that it’s at all reassuring to know who’s in there, because he can guess what he’s doing.

“Oi, Dazai, you’d better not be trying to get creative in there,” he calls out, but it comes out strained, and he brings a trembling hand to his chest, because breathing in enough to call out hurts like hell. But he’d needed to, because the other teenager is probably cooking in there, and he knows what Dazai’s creations are like --- edible, but not something he’d choose to eat if he had any other option. There’s no response from the direction of kitchen, not at first, and Chuuya contemplates the value of trying to force himself upright and mobile so that he can avert disaster. The problem, however, is that as worn-ragged as he is right now, he doesn’t think he could adequately compensate for his knee (which he’s supposed to be staying off of anyway), so he decides against it and lets his eyes fall closed again.

It feels like it’s only seconds later when he’s jerked awake again, this time by the sound of a far-too-cheerful “Chuuuyaaa~ I know you need your beauty sleep, but it’s time to wake up and eat your breakfast!” Chuuya, who very much does not want to wake up to see whatever it is that the bastard’s cooked up, huffs and turns his face into the back of his couch. This is answered by a poke to his shoulder, and he tries to swat it away to no avail. “Wake up,” the other boy sing-songs. “Lazy dogs don’t get presents.”

“Fuck you,” Chuuya groans, prying his eyes open and rubbing at his face with one hand. “I’m not your dog, and I don’t trust your damn cooking. What are you doing here, anyway?”

In response, Dazai reaches out and tugs lightly at the choker around Chuuya’s neck, quirking an eyebrow at him. “This says otherwise,” he says, the look on his face stilling Chuuya’s tongue, lest he slip and say something they both regret. Now that he’s properly awake, Chuuya can see that he’s brought a tray with him, and he turns his attention to that instead of rehashing their oldest argument. Surprisingly, what he can see of the food on said tray looks relatively normal ---  a convenience store meal rather than one of his partner’s creations, and sitting next to it is a box of macarons. He blinks, confused and flattered as much as he is irritated, because one, how the hell did the mackerel realize he like those, and two, what’s he doing giving him any?

Of course, the bastard reads the confusion on his face, and the innocent-looking blink he gets when he turns to scowl at him doesn’t give him any more clues. “Is Chuuya getting forgetful in his old age?” Dazai asks, and Chuuya doesn’t even dignify him with a response. “It’s your birthday,” he continues, and Chuuya finds himself with the other boy’s hand in his hair for the briefest of moments. He blinks, running that thought over in his mind for a moment. It--- it is. Huh. He’s sixteen now?

“...I hadn’t thought about it,” he admits slowly, frowning. He’d known it was the right time of year for his birthday, but they had the mission he’s still recovering from, and besides, he’s not used to acknowledging it. Why should he? It’s just another day, in the grand scheme of things. “That still doesn’t explain why you’re here,” he adds, though they both know he’s grateful. He’ll never admit it, but he’s always grateful for Dazai being nearby in the first week or so after he’s had to use Corruption, no matter how much it still pisses him off that he has to rely on the other teenager to bring him back out of it.

“I just told you,” Dazai says, slowly --- as though he’s speaking to a particularly unintelligent child. “It’s your birthday! You shouldn’t be holed up all alone and injured on your birthday, so I’m doing you a favor and keeping you company for the day!” It’s surprisingly thoughtful of him, Chuuya almost thinks, and he finds a smile creeping over his face --- at least until he sees the gleeful expression on Dazai’s face and the way he’s holding one hand behind his back, and a sinking feeling replaces any reassurance he’d felt. Oh no. Oh no, this cannot be anything good, that look on his partner’s face means Dazai’s feeling playful, and if he’s feeling playful then it means Chuuya’s going to be pissed off in the next few seconds.

He’s proven right when Dazai brings his hand out from behind his back, revealing a gaudy silver crown with plastic pink and purple gems --- they’re heart-shaped, why the hell are they heart shaped?!? --- , and horribly pink fuzz around the base. “I even brought you the perfect headwear for the occasion!” He declares, and plops the hideous thing on Chuuya’s head before he can protest. Chuuya finds himself sitting there for a moment in stunned silence, but then he snarls and grabs the offending object off of his head and throws it at Dazai with all the strength he can muster. (Dazai catches it, of course, but it’s still satisfying.) “You--- you shitty pile of too-many bandages, I’m not wearing that fucking thing!”

... if there’s something warm and affectionate curling deep in his heart, hidden underneath the protective layer of irritation, Chuuya’s not going to acknowledge it. It’s more than enough to know that his birthday was important enough to remember it --- that he was important enough for Dazai to remember his birthday, and to decide to spend it with him even though he’s likely to spend most of it being grumpy and in pain. It’s a nice feeling, and he finds himself smiling even when the shitty mackerel plunks the crown on his head all over again, with a warning that he’ll lose the rights to his not-yet-seen birthday present if he refuses to wear the birthday crown. He could... he could get used to this.

[detortum]

▲ ★ ☪ ☁

send me a symbol for…

▲  five time my muse thought about kissing yours, and the one time they did.

1. Dazai was lazing around at Chuuya’s apartment, at first having come here for business matters, but he stayed so he could bother his lover. At some point he ended up staring at the redhead filling in a report, the focused frown becoming visible, the lips a fine line, but not taut. Dazai wondered if he would get hit if he decided to kiss him now. 

2. Dazai rarely slept and if he did then it was a few hours at max. This was one of his sleepless nights. He didn’t pick up a book to read so instead, he ended up staring at Chuuya’s peaceful expression. He looked so innocent, which was indeed a surprise. His finger went up to touch the other’s lower lip, fighting the urge to peck them with his own lips. 

3. Sometimes, keeping their relationship really was no fun, because the urges and cravings for physical contact bugged him at odd times. He could easily spend time with the other without even so much as poke him for hours on end, especially when they were alone. But sometimes, when they were in public, the craving to have him close was there, like now. It wasn’t easy to always be with his lover if he couldn’t so much as kiss him. 

4. He was alone at home. They’d both been busy lately and unable to see each other except for brief moments at Headquarters or during a mission, but not to be with each other as a couple, alone. Dazai sometimes ended up fantasizing (was that normal?) about Chuuya kissing him and him kissing Chuuya. It wasn’t the real thing, but at least that way he could bear not being with his lover somewhat. 

5. Another time it made it hard for him to hold himself back in public was when they were out, eating. They were eating their dessert when Dazai caught Chuuya took a bite off a small strawberry. Honestly, kissing Chuuya’s lips would be a far better dessert…

One time he did: 

Chuuya had defeated the enemy by the use of his Corruption. He was still raging and tearing everything apart when Dazai walked up to him, cupped his cheeks and closed the distance between their lips for a moment or two. “You did it, beautiful. You can rest now.”

(other symbols under the cut)

★  five times my muse thought yours looked breath-taking, and the one time they voice it.

1. Funnily enough, he did enjoy Chuuya going on a rampage when he used his Corruption. It was a kind of beauty of its own. One of full release, not holding back and not caring about anything or anyone and Dazai honestly found it gorgeous. 

2. The day Chuuya’s status was upgraded to become one of the Executives of the Port Mafia. He had his own subordinates and they all instantly showed the respect Chuuya now deserved and demanded. This place fitted him much better and Dazai couldn’t help the smile that was forming on his lips as he watched the other being promoted from a short distance. 

3. Another time when Dazai watched Chuuya sleep. His hair flowed like satin, so soft was his hair. His mouth hanging a little bit open and his closed eyes showing such peace, Dazai realized again how beautiful Chuuya was. 

4. At the Onsen during Dazai’s birthday. He sat on the wooden floor just outside their room in his yukata watching Chuuya wash himself in the pond. Had he noticed him? Probably not or else he would’ve said something for sure. But the redhead looked gorgeous, the plainness and cliche scene gave it its own sense of beauty. 

5. When Chuuya wore the kimono. No matter what happened that day, it was the first time Dazai realized how good Chuuya looked, even in the kimono. 

One time he voiced it: 

It… wasn’t special. Perhaps it was awkward even, but Dazai ended up combing Chuuya’s red locks. Even after all the dots were gone, he continued anyway, liking the simple gesture of gently pulling the comb and watch the hair fall into place. When he finally decided he continued on long enough, he put the comb away and wrapped his arms around the other’s shoulders, pulling him against his front since he sat behind the redhead on the couch. Nuzzling his nose in his lover’s hair, he hummed. “You’re beautiful,” he managed to mumble before closing his eyes and enjoying the warm comfort settling in his chest. 

☪  five times our muses almost hold hands, and the one time they do.

1. He was about to take Chuuya’s hand, subconsciously wanting to reassure himself when one of his subordinates walked in. 

2. He managed to brush his hand past Chuuya’s. They were surrounded by other people but Dazai did it briefly while not managing to grab his hand instead as at that moment one of those around them decided to address him about the job at hand. 

3. Chuuya was using his Corruption. Dazai wanted to end it by taking his hand, but the other managed to avoid him and wanted to attack him when he managed to grab his wrist instead. 

4. Ah.. Chuuys was angry with him and when Dazai actually wanted to reach out he slapped his hand away. Clearly the fiery redhead needed some time alone before he could attempt this kind of contact again.. 

5. At the Onsen. They were enjoying the local festival. They wore masks that covered their eyes and each their own yukata. No one could possibly recognize them. Dazai was about to take Chuuya’s hand when a child bumped into him… with their ice cream now on said yukata…

One time they did: 

He didn’t know it would be the last time. He didn’t realize it during the moment and the moments after it. Dazai had been out of it all the two weeks after he lost his one friend, Odasaku. He didn’t care whether others, including Chuuya, knew what happened or not. He was staring at the sea on the Port and forgot he wasn’t alone until he felt a smaller, gloved hand slip into his left one. Tangling the fingers and squeezing a little in Chuuya’s hand, Dazai turned his face to look at his lover. He came to love him. He really did, but Odasaku’s promise took priority. 

☁  five times my muse has thought about yours, and the one time they do something about it.

1. He stared at a similar version of himself, sitting in front of him in the same posture, knees up, bleeding arms and hands in his hair. There was only one difference Dazai knew for certain. The other didn’t look terrified, not like Dazai did. It looked challenging as if urging him to do something. Dazai wanted to escape this ‘ghost’ since he knew this wasn’t his reflection in the mirror. This was his exhaustion and depression catching up, right? That was it, right? He was going mad, that’s what. It would disappear if he went outside, found someone, someone… like Chuuya! But the other was in the middle of a job and he wouldn’t meet Odasaku and Ango until later that night. 

2. Would Chuuya cook for him if he visited him now? The thought was fleeting and honestly, Dazai didn’t feel like getting up now. He was enjoying reading his book and drinking his fill too much to care. 

3. nsfw warning! Every man had his needs. However, to Dazai it didn’t happen often. With that, he meant feeling the need to release, to pleasure himself or to have someone else show this pleasure. It would be nice if Chuuya had been here now. He could’ve enjoyed his company, physically that is. Perhaps they could go further than they usually did. It would only be normal, right? They were a couple after all. His hand went to his bundle, caressing it while he thought of Chuuya, realizing how odd this was and felt because he didn’t usually do this, not while thinking of Chuuya doing the same thing or him doing it to Chuuya.. 

4. Six months during his disappearance to clear his name just enough so he could be hired by the Detective Agency. His mind wandered often, especially to his boyfriend, Chuuya. Well, he supposed their relationship was over now. Would the redhead ever forgive him for what he did? It was better this way. He even went as far as to blow up his car just to make the other hate him enough not to miss him. He wondered if it worked… 

5. He hadn’t seen Chuuya for several days now. It seemed he was on a job, one he needed to go out of the city for. He missed him, funnily enough. When would he be back? 

One time he did something about it: 

He wondered where his lover was. It was a fleeting thought, but the more minutes passed the more pressing the thought became until Dazai decided to give in to the impulse and decide to find the redhead. He called him, but he didn’t pick up. He drove by his apartment, but he wasn’t there either. So he went to one of the bars protected by the Port Mafia where he finally found his drunk boyfriend. 

   “It’s time to go home, partner,” he called out, not wanting to risk anyone thinking they shared a personal relationship, so he called him his partner this once. 

[no-longer-tainted]

YEAH I KNOW I AM LOUD AS HECK BUT DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING IN THAT FEM SOUKOKU BAG OF YOURS FOR AN ALPHA OMEGA UNIVERSE WHERE FEM DAZAI IS AN OMEGA AND FEM CHUUYA IS AN ALPHA (PLEASE HELP ME I M LOSING MY SHITS OVER THIS AU AND YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE, GOD SAID CAN HELP ME ALONG WITH @karkey ; A;) SLDIUGHFISZFF I WANT TO DIEEEEEE PLEASE VIOLENTLY ASSASSINATE ME WITH YOUR CONTENT

Please scream and be loud as much as you want because otherwise, I have to worry if you’re okay (;Д;)  Sooooo~ I’ll try my best to satisfy your wish!!

Just let me take a look into my magical bag

Okay, first I’ll go with a few basics that aren’t SKK-Exclusive Headcanons just to get the base down for the rest under the cut c: 

Female!Alphas usually have smaller breasts (around A/B) while female!Omegas usually have C+

Female!Alphas are quite rare but also not highly seen from the male counterparts  

They can kick your ass nevertheless if you touch their omega

I always kind of imagine that the connection between two persons in an omegaverse is like a soulmate connection and 

You can be together with other (sex) partners but there is only one scent that makes you the most comfortable 

There are no visible signs you just feel it over the time you get to know the person

female!omega have their first heat later than males around their 18th/19th birthday and after that the circle is individual 

Alphas get ruts only if they are around an omega they personally think is worth them and have their heat (it happens rather rarely to alphaxalpha-couples to have a rut)

Now get blown away by the SKK-Stuff for you and I hope you’ll survive and I’ll survive and you will love it!!

Opposites attract

With a deep sigh, Chuuya fell down on the bed. It gave a squeaking sound when she fell down on her back and for a moment she simply stared at the phone in her hand. It still showed an incoming call from her bigger sister Kouyou. Not that they were blood-related but she really looked up to her in many ways. Sighing again, she swiped the button to the right and answered the call. “Ane-san, what a surprise!”, she tried to sound surprised but it was not hard to predict that she would call. It was only a matter of time because Chuuya’s birthday would be in a few days.

Through the phone was the shifting sound of clothes audible followed by a quiet coughing sound before she spoke: “It took you a long time to answer the call, Chuuya. Did something happen?”

Chuuya rolled her eyes and shook her head. “No.” Expect that she didn’t want to hear anything Kouyou would tell her in the next minutes. The following would be the easiest lie of today. “I was on the toilet and-”

“No further explanations, please,” Kouyou interrupted her and Chuuya chuckled over her reaction. “It’s your eighteenth birthday on Saturday.”

Pressing her lips into a thin line, she didn’t give Kouyou an answer. Of course, she knew about her own birthday. It wasn’t like it was easy to forget because she was an Alpha and her parents wanted nothing more than finally see her with another male alpha mate and bothered her the last month with it.

“We have a few candidates for you,” Kouyou spoke further when Chuuya didn’t answer and it sounded like a stupid omiai. She didn’t want to mate with some random dude she didn’t know even less loved. “You’re free to-”

“What if I already have a mate?”, Chuuya interrupted Kouyou and the next moment she wasn’t sure if she regretted the answer or not. It was the bluntest lie she ever told right in Kouyou’s face - almost in her face. It didn’t change the fact that it was a lie.

“Then-” Kouyou seemed surprised about that sudden information. “Who?”

The question was simple but her brain only gave her a huge blackout. What was she supposed to answer? Chuuya swallowed hard and looked around her room like it was possible to find an answer in it. “It’s- you know-” She licked over her dry lips and took a deep breath. There was no way she could take her words back. “It’s Dazai.”

“Dazai?” The disbelief in her voice was clearly audible even though she seemed to try to hide it. Of course, she knew about their friendship like her whole family did but hearing that they were mates was probably unexpected for them because Dazai was an omega.

Silence followed.

Everything inside Chuuya turned upside down and she suddenly felt like she needed to vomit her dinner. Her answer was a nod, only realizing a few moments later that Kouyou wasn’t able to see it so she answered with a simple “Yes.”

“Well, that comes quite unexpected but you could have told me earlier.” Kouyou sounded hurt, probably because she had to learn about it now and Chuuya not coming directly to her to tell her the news.

“Sorry.” She felt even worse now. “It’s just- just- it felt so fresh and personal- I didn’t know- I wasn’t sure how to tell you.”

Again silence fell over the two of them and Chuuya didn’t know how to talk further without spinning more of these lies.

Another sigh from Kouyou before she spoke again: “Then I’m glad you finally introduce her as your mate the upcoming weekend.”

Chuuya blinked a few times at her words. Oh fuck. “Yeah,” Chuuya agreed. How should she possibly ask Dazai to play her mate at the family gathering? Dazai was her best friend but it felt wrong to pull her into the lie when she already had a crush on someone else. More importantly, Chuuya didn’t want to make things awkward between them because Dazai would definitely find out about her crush on her with all the affection they would have to share that weekend. “I’ll write you the time we’ll arrive later these days but now I have to do some chores, so see you Friday, Ane-san, love you.” she didn’t even let her answer before the phone call was ending. Chuuya could literally see how Kouyou shook her head in disbelief because there was no way she would do chores on a Monday at ten in the evening.

-☆-

Staring at her hazelnut cappuccino and drumming her fingers on the cup, Chuuya felt like it would mock her. She had met up with Dazai in the city after school like they did every day because they weren’t on the same high school. They were sitting around for ten minutes now without her saying a word while Dazai talked non-stop about Oda, her teacher for Japanese Literature and obviously her crush since the new school year had started.

“Oh, and he helped me to choose your birthday present!” Dazai beamed happily at her. “I didn’t know what to get for you but now I have the perfect one!” She wagged with her cake fork in front of Chuuya’s face and a moment late she shoved the pastry in her own mouth second later and appreciative chewed on it. “Delicious!”

Usually, Chuuya would snitch Dazai’s fork and try a bite of the cake but she didn’t feel like it today. Especially all the talk about Oda let her feel even worse about her lies. “You know, my birthday is a good point.” She took a sip of her hot drink and let it calm down her stomach, Dazai looking at her with her cheeks full with cake. Without holding eye contact, Chuuya asked: “Could you pretend to be my mate over the weekend?” When the question was out, she was about to drown herself in the cappuccino cup and she still didn’t dare to look Dazai into her eyes, anxious about her immediate first reaction.

Surprised, Dazai swallowed the cake in her mouth and put her fork down to grab her hot chocolate. “Where comes that question from?” She ate the whipped cream on it and smacked.

Chuuya could feel the embarrassment creeping into her face and for a brief moment she looked up to Dazai. “Yesterday I may or may not have told Kouyou that you’re my mate.” Even though she didn’t want Dazai in her web of lies, she couldn’t come up with another plan either.

Frowning at her cup for a moment, Dazai looked over to Chuuya and raised an eyebrow. “Why would you do that?” She sounded like that was the most ridiculous thing she ever heard but in an amused way.

A deep sigh was the answer. She had never told Dazai about how persistent her parents were over the last months to get her a mate to her eighteenth birthday. “I panicked, okay?” Chuuya’s face was a bright red and she wanted to hide so bad. “My asshole grandparents wanted to introduce me to other potential mating-candidates and I- I don’t want that!” Only thinking about some of those would touch her gave her goosebumps.

Dazai was silence for a while and the moment, Chuuya wanted to add something, she answered: “We have a deal when you pay my cake for the rest of the year.” Dazai smirked and reached her hand out for a handshake.

With her heart almost jumping out through her throat, Chuuya stared at the hand in front of her, with those long and slim fingers ready to touch her own small hand. When she reached out to grab the hand, Chuuya wasn’t sure how good the contract she was about to sign really was but she was relieved, Dazai wasn’t saying no. “Deal.”

The rest would work out somehow. She would do her best that Dazai wouldn’t find out about her crush and convince her family that they were mates. Lucky, Dazai hadn’t her first heat yet so they wouldn’t have the problem of a mating bite symbol as a proof. Also, how things would go on after the weekend was a deferrable problem for now.

“If we’re finished, you have to come home with me, Chuuya!”

Confused, Chuuya looked up to her friend and frowned at her. “Why?”

“I still couldn’t decide on which dress I should wear to your birthday ball and you have to help me with a decision!” She looked at Chuuya with her huge brown puppy eyes and had her hands folded in front of her pouting lips. “And we have to talk about the details of our relationship.” A cheeky grin was on her face.

With the word relationship, Chuuya’s face heated up again and her eyes flew down on her half-empty cup. Maybe it was wrong and maybe it would break her heart after the weekend was over but a small part of her brain was really looking forward to all the affection they would share those three days. “Okay, I’ll help your lazy ass out.” Suddenly, Chuuya wasn’t sure if this weekend would end better or worse now.

“Yay!” Dazai clapped her hands together in happiness and smiled brightly.

-☆-

Chuuya sat in Dazai’s beanbag chair after they talked about their relationship story and watched her trying on different dresses and Dazai had a shitload amount of dresses. Adding the fact that Dazai was standing in front of Chuuya only wearing her underwear made the work hard because her eyes always wandered to her breasts as soon as she was out of the dress again.

The last one Dazai put out of her wardrobe was an elegant blue dress. She was talking about how she had bought that dress because she liked how smooth it was on her own body but never had a chance to wear it. Now she was eager to hear Chuuya’s opinion on it. A few moments later, she held it in front of her body and showed it Chuuya. The blue flattered her skin tone before she even wore it but

“Stop staring at my boobs, Chuuya.” Dazai laughed and put the dress on. It reached down to the floor and covered most of her scarred skin.

The only problem next to her reddening cheeks and ears was that Chuuya couldn’t concentrate on it because all she was doing was staring at how beautiful Dazai looked in the dress and her crush intensified hundred per cent at least. Chuuya was doomed. Dazai looked like a princess in the dress. Maybe she should just think about wearing a suit instead of that black dress she got from her cousin Aya for Christmas and planned to wear. She would look like a potato in a dress next to Dazai and not like she was the main person of that extravagant event.

Dazai raised both of her eyebrows and looked at Chuuya in anticipation. “And~? What do you think?” While her cheeks were red due to her excitement, she spun herself around and stepped closer to Chuuya. “It’s probably too much.” She plugged the fabric and sighed.

“No, it looks- you look beautiful in it! You definitely need to wear it!” Chuuya complimented her with a slight blush on her own cheeks. “At least one of us will look good in a dress then.”

Humming thoughtful, Dazai put her index finger on her lips and looked up at the ceiling. “I could borrow a suit from my cousin Yumeno if you’d be more comfortable.”

“Isn’t he like 14 years old?”, Chuuya asked confused and frowned at Dazai. She wasn’t against the thought of wearing a suit instead of a dress but her grandparents would probably kill her on spot for that and she didn’t want their wrath on her more than she already had.

“Yeah, should be exactly your size.” Cheeky, she stuck out her tongue out and dodged the teddy bear Chuuya threw at her. She slipped out of the dress and put it back on the clothes hanger and with that on her wardrobe door. Because she was wearing only underwear again, Chuuya couldn’t look at her. Then out of nowhere she jumped on Chuuya’s lap and grinned at her.

“Wha- Dazai?” Her cheeks were instant dark red and her heartbeat sped up like she just ran a marathon.

“There is one thing we still have to do in order to achieve believableness over the weekend,” she started to explain and positioned herself better on Chuuya’s two legs, her boobs right in front of Chuuya’s blushing face. She looked down to Chuuya and lifted her face by pushing it up with both of her hands put around Chuuya’s cheeks.

Chuuya’s eyes wandered over Dazai’s face and when their eyes met, Chuuya swallowed. Her lips were getting dry and her hands started to sweat while her heart decided to speed up even more and started to skip beats. She bit on her bottom lip and with her thump, Dazai stroked over the soft red skin of Chuuya’s lips.

“It’s just practice don’t get so nervous, Chuuya~”, Dazai teased her friend and had her typical smug smile on her face when she tilted her head slightly and closed the gap between their lips with closed eyes.

Shutting off every function of her brain with the kiss, Chuuya wasn’t able to react. She always wished to have her first kiss with Dazai but now it felt so wrong that her heart ached. It was just an exercise for the weekend for Dazai there were no feelings within the kiss from her side. Nevertheless, she slowly started to kiss her back, putting her shaking hand on her cheek while the other was laying on her hips.

Dazai was the first to break the kiss between them and a thin strand of saliva ripped between them. She happily smiled at Chuuya. Suddenly smirking, Dazai looked at her best friend. “To let it look believable you definitely need more practice.”

Chuuya clicked her tongue. “Fuck off.” She pushed Dazai off of her lap. She licked over her lips and still tasted the sweet taste of Dazai’s lips on hers.

“Ouch, Chuuya!”, Dazai whined and rubbed her butt with both of her hands.

“It’s not like- like we have to-” She failed to swallow the lump in her throat down and when she spoke again her voice was less noisy: “kiss in front of the others.” Chuuya didn’t dare to look at Dazai again and pressed her lips into a thin line.

Crawling on her knees towards Chuuya, she pulled her down on the ground too. “You could stay overnight if you want?”

“I have nothing with me except my school stuff?” Chuuya threw an incredulous look at Dazai. The alternative was to sleep in her small student room but driving home and back was stupid too.

Pouting, Dazai looked at Chuuya. “As if you couldn’t wear my stuff for sleeping and I think I’ll have a spare toothbrush too.”

A resigning sigh was the only answer Chuuya gave Dazai. “You won’t give up, right?”

Smiling innocently at her best friend, Dazai put her hands together under her chin, spread the fingers and just glimpsed at Chuuya.

Chuuya groaned and threw herself on Dazai, both falling back and Chuuya landing on Dazai. “You’re the most annoying thing I know,” she complained and closed her eyes. She smelled so nice and innocent. Like the first warm days in spring, that warm up your winter frozen heart and fill you with new energy.

“I love your hair,” Dazai complimented her hair for the thousandths time since they knew each other and stroked through the soft orange locks.

She always hated the color because she got bullied for it and it always stood out in masses also it was stubborn to care for. With Dazai she learned to love it. “And I love your boobs as a pillow.” It was supposed to be a joke but Dazai’s awkward laugh made Chuuya blush again especially because her brain reminded her of the fact that she still only wore a bra and her panties. “I mean- you know-”

“It’s okay. It’s nice to know someone appreciates them more than as milk bags for a future child I have to bear.” She put her arms around her friend.

Chuuya hugged Dazai slightly in this awkward position. She knew Dazai was anxious about her first heat coming closer like her own birthday and fate. Only that her problem was more unpredictable due to her being an omega. “If ever someone you don’t like lays a hand on you I’ll kill them personally.”

Dazai smiled. “Thank you, Chuuya.”

-☆-

Friday came faster than Chuuya was willing to accept. She was only at home once since Tuesday to get some fresh clothes and everything she would need over the weekend. The journey with the shinkansen was quiet and relaxed too. As far as relaxed could go when your crush fell asleep on your shoulder and slightly drooled on your shirt because they dreamt and mumbled something about the world largest cake. Chuuya herself listened to her favorite rock bands and stared out of the window.

It was weird having a three-day-relationship starting today especially because she never was in a real relationship before either. In addition to that, they have to convince her family that Dazai really was her mate and it wasn’t just a made up lie to escape her grandparents choice of mate. She closed her eyes and leaned against Dazai’s head for a brief moment. Her soft brown locks smelled sweet and tickled her cheek. Chuuya’s brain still screamed at her that she should make the best out of it and at the same time how much she risked and how stupid she actually was. She agreed with the last one the most.

“Dazai?” Chuuya joggled her friend awake, straightened herself better and stretched her body.

“I slept so well, why did you wake me?”, Dazai mumbled sleepy, rubbed her eyes and yawned with her arms stretching in front of her chest.

Why was that girl so cute? With a slight blush on her cheeks, Chuuya answered: “We’re almost there, sleepyhead.”

Like they wanted to agree with Chuuya the name for their station was announced as the next stop in a few minutes.

Chuuya packed her earphones into her small backpack while Dazai put her sweet titbits away. She had snatched a few of the waffles while Dazai was asleep but Chuuya was pretty sure she was eating more of that stuff than ever. Her stomach was a black hole for sweet stuff for sure.

With their small luggage, they made their way to the doors of the shinkansen and waited for it to arrive. Chuuya’s tension rose from zero to maximum. Her heartbeat ran amok while her hands got sweaty and her lips dry. She really wished her confidence would be as high as it was usually but with the pressure of her grandparents in the back, she felt nothing but uncomfortable.

Dazai grabbed her free hand and squeezed it. “Don’t worry.”

She took a deep breath. “I don’t worry about anything,” she lied and freed her hand from Dazai’s grip. It was embarrassing in front of strangers.

“Who do you want to deceive?”, Dazai asked and patted Chuuya’s head, then she waited until the door opened and jumped out of the train. She turned around and took Chuuya’s luggage out of the train, too.

Somehow they weaved through the crowd out of the station and walked towards the bus station where they would take the bus to the Nakahara-Ryukan. They had to wait around ten minutes for the bus and a drive of like forty minutes before they arrived late afternoon. From the bus stop, it was only another three minutes walk to the big wooden gates and Chuuya hesitated half a second before she rang the doorbell. What could possibly go wrong?

“Good Evening, Nakahara-san-” The blond girl which opened the gates for them bowed slightly in front of Chuuya “-and Dazai-san.” She nodded at the brunette girl and took their luggage. “I’ll take care of that. Your grandparents are already waiting for you.” Her voice was tense and she probably felt relieved not to have to go with them.

“Thank you, Higuchi-san.” Chuuya turned around to Dazai and smiled warily at her. “Come on.”

While walking, Dazai intertwined their hands and Chuuya let it happen. It could help to make their point clear. They made their way through the ryukan in the back courtyard and into the big family house. From there they were guided by Kyouka Izumi, a young girl under Kouyou’s care. They didn’t exchange one word on their way through the long floors and when Kyouka had left they were alone in a room with Chuuya’s grandparents and Kouyou.

Chuuya hadn’t realized her grip around Dazai’s hand has gotten tighter with every meter they had walked but when she saw the smile of Kouyou she relaxed a little bit - only to double up her tension when she saw the blank expression of her grandparents.

Her grandmother stepped forward and wrinkled her nose up when she looked at Dazai before she put her attention towards Chuuya. “Your clothes are a disaster.” Her eyes wandered from her head with the beanie she wore down to her shirt with the logo of her favorite rock band on it and her ripped jeans combined with red boots. Chuuya flinched back when her grandmother put a hand on her cheeks and roughly turned it towards her. “And you still don’t use make-up and take care of your chapped lips, girl.”

“Chuuya-”

Dazai wanted to stand up for her friend but her grandfather stepped in before she could say a word more. “I don’t want to hear a word, omega.” How he spit out the last word made clear how low he thought of Dazai. Usually, Chuuya only brought her with her if he wasn’t around but this year was special so all of them were here. She knew how low he thought of Dazai and it hurt to be reminded of it after she drowned that thought successfully.

“Don’t talk to her like that!”, Chuuya growled at her grandfather and stepped in front of the taller girl. Her eyes flashed and her usually bright blue iris got dark like a thunderstorm appeared over the sky. Her body was in an attack position and she was ready to defend her girl.

“Good grief.” Kouyou stepped between Chuuya and her grandfather before it could escalate and laid an arm around her shoulders, the fabric of her kimono stroking over Chuuya’s back. “I’ll make sure she changes into proper clothes and we’ll meet for dinner.” Pushing both girls out of the room, Chuuya only relaxed when they were back in the ryukan.

They walked in silence to what Chuuya thought was their room for the weekend but when she only saw her own luggage in the room together with one futon, she angrily turned around to Kouyou. “Where is her stuff?”, she demanded to know, pointing at Dazai and almost jumped at Kouyou’s throat but could stop herself. Her level of anger was still too high for her own likings.  

“She has her own room,” Kouyou explained with a calm voice and entered the room to shuffle some of the fabrics in the wardrobe around and pulling a kimono out of it.

“What the fuck?”

“Chuuya, language.” Kouyou hung the kimono on the outside of the wardrobe and sighed. “You’re grandparents decided that after I told them about your relationship with Dazai.” She threw a glance at the other girl who was only looking around like she wasn’t the main topic right now.

“I fucking don’t care?!” Chuuya’s anger just built up more and more with every second passing.

Dazai stepped behind her and patted Chuuya’s head. “It’s okay, Chuuya.”

“No!” She pushed the hand away and turned around to her fake-mate. “I won’t accept that.”

Kouyou chuckled behind her hand. “I never saw you that possessive, Chuuya.”

The sudden realization made her blush. “I-” She swallowed hard. “Of course- I mean-” She looked over to Dazai but wasn’t able to read her expressionless eyes. “She’s mine and I do- I’ll fight for her.”

-☆-

After a catastrophic dinner, Chuuya had switched back into more comfortable clothes and watched the stars on the ryukan roof the last hours. It calmed her down even though her thoughts were still a storm inside her brain. The dinner was only to describe as a complete disaster because Dazai was the only omega on the table. Her grandparents and Kouyou were all three alphas and Chuuya was more than once ready to threw her knife at her grandparent’s throat, accidentally of course. Those old bastards made it clear that Dazai was not suitable as a mate for Chuuya and they never let her form a whole sentence.

“You were pretty cool, you know?”

Chuuya got up in a sitting position and turned around to Dazai. The dimmed lights of the onsen were the only thing spending them some light next to the stars on the sky. “Stop teasing me.”

Dazai sat down next to Chuuya and smiled at the sky. “No, I mean it.”

Letting her head down on Dazai’s lap, Chuuya watched the stars on the sky. “I’m sorry it’s my fault because I lied to Kouyou.”

Stroking the soft hair out of Chuuya’s face, she smiled down on her pretty friend. “And I agreed knowing how they feel about me.”

“But it’s even worse now…”

“You’ll get wrinkles if you worry even more,” Dazai teased her and poked her cheek.

Chuuya pulled a sulky face. “I’m getting old in a few minutes anyway.”

“Yeah,” Dazai agreed. “Like eighteen is that old.”

She sat up and turned towards Dazai. “It is! You know what that means!”

Dazai hummed in agreement and smiled at her. “I know, I know but could you please close your eyes for a moment?”, Dazai asked after she had looked at her watch and had the most innocent expression Chuuya ever saw on her.

That made her doubt everything but she closed her eyes nevertheless. The sudden blindness made her nervous and she clung to her sleep pants to calm down a little. What was Dazai planning now? Suddenly she felt something cold around her neck and she was about to open her eyes but Dazai put her hands above to stop her. “Happy Birthday, Chuuya,” she whispered in her ear and Chuuya could feel how her whole body was covered in goosebumps.

“What-” She wanted to ask when she could open her eyes and see the necklace Dazai had put around her neck but her sentence was stopped when she felt Dazai’s lips on her own. It felt soft and sweet the second it lasted.

“Girls, get down from the roof!

Hearing Kouyou’s voice, Chuuya instantly flinched and understood the meaning behind the kiss. It was just to show off in front of Kouyou. Sadness washed over the happiness. "Coming!”

Both girls easily jumped down from the roof and landed in front of Kouyou. “Don’t let that see your grandparents, Chuuya,” Kouyou scolded her lukewarm. Chuuya wasn’t sure what exactly Kouyou meant. The jump or the kiss? Probably both. Kouyou walked towards Chuuya and hugged her tightly. “I wish you all the best for your birthday, Chuuya. May all your wishes come true and your courage never leave you alone.”

“Thank you, Ane-san.”

-☆-

Even they managed to share a futon overnight - and Chuuya couldn’t sleep for a full hour straight, they were separated the whole day.

Right after the breakfast, Chuuya was busy with the obligatory presents she got from all her family members and family acquaintances. After that, she was taken in for hours of dancing lessons with a teacher they booked especially for today - of course, another alpha. When she finally was able to do the basics of the basics without stepping on his toes, Chuuya got caught for make-up and putting her into the dress. Every time she was about to pass Dazai, she was pulled away before they were able to exchange words.

Even she was always around others she never felt more lonely than today.

When she stared at herself in the mirror she couldn’t believe that was her in the mirror. Kouyou was stepping behind her and had the most precious kimono on her while she herself wore a beautiful black dress with blue accents. “It’s the same blue-”

Chuuya already rolled her blue eyes. It was obvious that her grandparents chose stuff to give her eyes more attention. “I know, I don’t want to hear it now. I think that was the most horrible birthday so far,” she groaned and stepped a few steps backwards, holding the long back part of her skirt up high so she wouldn’t step on it with her high heels accidentally.

“Even worse-”

“Yeah, worse than my tenth birthday when I fell down the ladder and broke both my arm and my leg,” Chuuya interrupted her and when she heard the laugh behind her, Chuuya’s face instantly turned red.

“You never told me about that, Chuuya.” Right in front of her stood Dazai in that beautiful dress she already knew but with having her hair done and with some light make-up - both carried Kouyou’s thumbprint - she was even more gorgeous than last time.

The only thing Chuuya could do was staring at her unable to put words on the way from her brain to her mouth. Then she saw the necklace around Dazai’s neck and it was the same she got as a birthday present from her. With that thought in her mind, she dashed towards the commode and looked for her’s. She was pretty sure, she had it with her other jewellery for today. Panicking because she couldn’t find it, she turned around when Kouyou touched her shoulder.

“It’s here, Chuuya.” Kouyou held it up and smiled when she saw how relieved Chuuya was seeing it. “Come, I help you with it you.” With her long and gentle fingers, she put the necklace around her neck and kissed her hair.

Kouyou’s cold finger on her skin let Chuuya shudder. “Why aren’t you against our relationship?” The question was in her head the whole day but she didn’t plan on asking it right now, it just slipped.

“Why should I be against your happiness?”

Chuuya couldn’t look her into the eyes. She had to tell her the truth tomorrow before they would travel back home. Her stomach never felt worse than knowing she still lied straight into Kouyou’s face. “Yeah, right. We should go. I still have to do the opening dance.” Her blue eyes flattered to Dazai for a moment before she intertwined their fingers and squeezed them slightly.

It would be hard being the focus with Dazai as her dance partner because literally no one had accepted her as her mate but not even her grandparents would break the tradition that the opening dance was with the birthday alpha and their mate. Adding to the problem was that she still struggled a lot and she had to lead the dance because she was the alpha.

The way to the hall felt like it was too long (thanks to her shoes that made her closer to Dazai’s height because Dazai was wearing almost flat shoes) and too short (because her stomach killed her) at the same time. Also, she was embarrassed because her hand sweated so much that Dazai just squeezed it tighter to give her wordlessly more courage.

When they entered the hall, everyone was looking at them like they had waited for the entrance and Chuuya’s stomach twisted even more now. With as much confidence as she could scrape together, she walked towards the smaller stage in the middle of the hall where she would open up the evening together with Dazai, still hand in hand. “Are you okay?”, she whispered over the calm piano-violin music and glanced at Dazai for a brief moment before she took the steps up to the stage without stumbling over her own two feet.

“Probably as much as you are,” she answered with a smile at Chuuya.

On the stage, Chuuya put her hand on Dazai’s hips, the other still intertwined with each other. The music got louder and suitable for the first dance. Her heartbeat sped up to the tenth at least and she took a deep breath before she took the first step forward to lead the dance.

In the beginning, Chuuya concentrated only on her steps but it didn’t take them long to get their own pace suitable to the speed of the music without being out of tact and she thought, that she really enjoyed it for the first time. Though, she wasn’t sure if Dazai did take the lead secretly but either way it was great. She felt so soft and like it was really her day today.

Slowly other couples started to dance around them, Chuuya wasn’t sure who all those people were but she didn’t really care either. They blurred out into some background noise while she danced a second and a third dance with Dazai before they left the smaller stage to blend in with the other couples. At least that was the plan but when she was about to go down the few steps, someone bumped into her. “Sorry-!”, she apologized automatically and flinched back when she saw that spiteful gaze of the man. He was another alpha that made his aura more than obvious.

“Oh, you’re that petit alpha girl.” The bulky man laughed mockingly in her face and then his gaze wandered towards Dazai, clearly visible to her breasts. He was at least a head taller than Dazai and his body was broad under the black suit he was wearing. “Mating with an ugly cow - not really alpha-like.”

A few more people are staring and whispering now.

Chuuya angrily stared at him. She didn’t know who that guy was and she gave a fuck for the info. She would almost bet all her hats that he was someone her grandparents wanted her to pair up with. “Oh, I don’t think that’s one of your concerns.”

“Let me touch her huge funbags.” He was about to squeeze Dazai’s breasts when he suddenly flew through half of the hall.

Chuuya growled at him. “Touch her and I’ll kill you here and now.” Dazai laid a hand on her shoulder to calm her down but it didn’t help at all. “You filthy scumbag won’t lay a hand on her!” Maybe she was small for an alpha but she wouldn’t let anyone ever touch Dazai.

“Chuuya, stop that. Everyone is staring.” Dazai was right. Everyone was staring and even the music stopped.

The small girl looked around her, stepped closer to Dazai. “I suppose you and your three-centimeter dick know what a true alpha is!” Chuuya clicked her tongue and blew a loose hair strand out of her eyes. Still, with all the adrenaline in her body, she grabbed Dazai’s hand and dashed out of the hall with her. She pulled her along until they were out of sight for everyone and the cool air outside helped Chuuya to get a fresh head.

Chuuya turned around and wanted to say an apology to Dazai but before even one letter was out of her mouth, she had Dazai pressed against her lips, both of her hands cupping Chuuya’s face. Her feet gave up on her weight and both girls fell on the ground still kissing. Chuuya closed her eyes and kissed Dazai back. Her heart screamed, her cheeks were flushed red and her whole body was trembling while she clung onto Dazai’s dress and she couldn’t tell if it was due to the fresh evening air or her nervousness combined with the vanishing adrenaline.  "Chuuya-“ Dazai said breathlessly when they broke the kiss to catch some air. "It’s not fake, you know? It never was from the beginning and I’m so sorry.”

Confused, Chuuya looked at Dazai. “What- I don’t understand?”

“I have feelings for you and I couldn’t hold back after you were so protective.” Her smile was a mix between happiness over what has happened and sadness over her own weakness. “Probably since you rescued me from that filthy asshole in our first middle school year.”

Working like crazy, Chuuya felt like her brain would explode any second. “You don’t have a crush on Oda?” That wasn’t what she wanted to ask, it wasn’t even a thought in her brain and still, she said those words like it was the most important question.

“Huh? No? No way. He is way too old for me. Urgh.” She shook her body like it was unbelievable that Chuuya thought something like that. “Besides that, I’m not into men. I really thought you knew that.”

“But-”

“But I was happy with our friendship as it was, that’s the reason I never confessed. Your an alpha and your scary-as-shit grandparents wanted to see you with another alpha- they already made that clear to me the first time we visited them.”

Chuuya looked down on her lap and fiddled with her finger. It was probably able to cook fried egg on her cheeks. “I don’t know what to say, can I just kiss you again?”

Dazai started to laugh and couldn’t stop. “Chuuya- your face-! Hilarious!”

Furiously blushing, Chuuya wanted to make her stop by pushing her own hands over Dazai’s mouth but she slipped with her foot over her dress and crashed into her, Dazai just laughing more and hugging her tightly.

“If you’re my alpha, I may even look forward to my first heat.”

Chuuya just hid against Dazai’s body. “You’re stupid.”

-☆-

It was Sunday and Chuuya was alone in her room because Dazai was playing chess against Hirotsu, one of the Nakahara’s butler. She still needed to pack her stuff but everything she was doing was staring blankly at her wall. She still wasn’t over the fact that their whole fake relationship was the starting point of their real relationship.

They didn’t sleep that night and talked a lot about their past and feelings and it ended in many embarrassing topics Chuuya rather wouldn’t speak about but all the snuggling and kissing made up for it.

A knock on the door threw her back into reality.

“Come in!”, she called and looked surprised at Kouyou. “Oh, good morning, Ane-san.”

“Dazai said, you wanted to talk with me?”, she asked and entered her room and sat down next to her after Chuuya nodded.

“Yeah-” Even if she thought, she would have more time to prepare herself and not so suddenly. “I wasn’t honest about Dazai as my mate.”

Kouyou chuckled. “You can be so straightforward now. Did it change?”

Chuuya nodded again, not able to look her into the face. “I felt bad for lying and-”

Crawling next to Chuuya in her kimono, Kouyou hugged her slightly. “You really thought I’d bought that lie? You’re the worst when it comes to lies. Though- your crush on her was amusing to watch.”

“No- Ane-san-!” In horror, she looked at Kouyou.

“Revenge for lying at me.” She patted her still damp hair and her smile was sad. “When everything calmed down I want to tell you my story but for now enjoy your time with Dazai.”

Then suddenly the door crashed open and Dazai stumbled inside. “Chuuya! Look! Look! Look!” She held a crab plush in the hand. “I got it from Hirotsu-san for winning against him in chess!”

Chuuya smiled at her girlfriend. She could remember the first time she won against him, she got a sheep plush from him. Now she asked herself how he always knew about their favorite animals?

“In two hours I’ll drive you to the train station so be ready by then,” Kouyou said and left them both alone in the room.