#he really sees the suffering
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the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.
sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.
you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.
it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.
but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.
they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.
they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.
barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.
and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.
but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.
they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!
this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.
#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone#yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post.#writeblr#ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person#and on this blog we support workers.#at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going.#when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens#have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists#and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like.#it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases -#at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory.#it was what i had seen.#and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference#we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol'#so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender#and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID.#he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different#i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.
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Simon has always been confused on why you gift him toys. Sure, most of the gifts you gave him were some of the things he liked. Bourbon, masks, gloves, make up for him to smudge his eyes with, some daggers and knives. Things that we're useful for him, just him. But later, you gifted him a toy airplane. He makes a comment about it, saying he is not a child anymore and you were better off giving it to Johnny instead.
"No, this is specifically for you, take it."
When he gets to him room, he walks toward his trash can, opening it with the tip of his boot. He gives one more look at the toy, his mood souring before throwing it into the trash. He goes on about his day, training, signing paper work, drills. Doing anything to ignore the pain stinging memories that the toy brought back. Emotions that were buried thousands of feet deep it could reach hell itself. Later, he lies awake in bed, staring at the ceiling, avoiding looking at the cylinder shape that's calling for him in his peripheral.
Fuck.
He pulls the covers off vigorously and stomps over to the trash can. He is standing over it like he's trying to intimidate it, as if it was an enemy he's trying to get rid of in battle. To anyone else, the scene would look comical.
He sighs to himself and reaches down to take out the toy he so cruelly threw away. He sets it on his desk and quickly walks toward his bed, facing away from his desk.
The next day, he wakes up feeling different. He swears he sees his room more vibrant, more lively. That energy follows him through out the day, having his other teammates notice his rather bright mood.
You catch him in the hallway. Pulling him aside to ask him about the paper work you left at his desk this morning. Of course, he notices the way you smile brightly, more so than usual. But he notices that you're not looking at him. More like looking at something next to him.
"What's got you so cheery?"
You turn to look up at him, feeling a bit embarrassed.
"I just..." You take a quick glance at the spot next to him, before bringing your eyes back upon his.
"I just hope you liked your gift." The same bright smile appearing on your face.
He stares at you, examining your words. Your expression.
You think you see his eyes crinkle a bit.
"Yea,"
"I liked it."
#call of duty#cod#simon ghost riley#simon riley#ghost#simon riley x reader#medium!reader#Joseph really liked his toy airplane#Honestly this was her way of giving his nephew toys without her bring up that she sees dead people#she can't be like “Ghost let me gift Joseph something”#he would be like “How the fawk you know who that is??”#sorry for errors its so late#but yea ill have more soon#I just cant figure out how to traumatize Gaz and Soap#Only Ghost and Price#love to see the old men suffer#ghost simon riley#ghost x reader
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Scholarly peak is catching up on recent literature
#bingqiu#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#svsss#sqq#lbh#my art#which is honestly just to say that i've finished the other two print books i was reading#and am now prepared to leap feet first into svsss bk4#i succeeded in holding off for an entire two weeks. i have the conviction of a wet paper towel.#lets see bk4 was described as - what? - an ''angst and smut pile''??#i am very much looking forward to this#i was promised a story with my snake boy#because i am very much not over zhuzhi-lang's fate so this had better be A REALLY NICE HAPPY ONE FOLKS#anyway have sqq and lbh cuddling and reading as i project on them#i like to assume that as time goes on sqq is able to relax his persona a bit more around lbh#i think he should get to cuddle and bitch about shitty novels#but man sqh is really the ONLY source of any books that have an even slightly modern cadence/style i have a feeling sqq would be very keen#though if i'm being honest i really wonder if sqh could ever bring himself to write fiction again#if you're A Writer it tends to be hard to RESIST you just get an itch to tell a story#but also like... the fear that all of this could happen again... or that the characters you're creating might be REAL and SUFFERING...#yeah... i honestly suspect he can't write anymore and that it honestly probably sucks a lot... but for the sake of this joke he is :P
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george rexstrew deserves awards for many things but i have to say. edwin’s bloodcurdling scream as niko gets killed deserves a whole award unto itself. like. that scream did not feel at all like a tv show scream. to a somewhat jarring degree. and i can’t express how much I respect that
#he has a number of very convincing screams and suffering noises which I imagine was an important prerequisite for the role#but this one is just especially chilling and again. jarring. not saying that the other actors are bad or anything but no one even comes#close to competing with george and its stark in moments like this#another screaming moment that I thought he did really well in particular is far easier to gloss over and that’s#when he and charles are escaping hell and he almost gets dragged down into lust#when he’s screaming out for charles he borderline SCREECHES#throughout that arc in general it’s just incredible but yeah#I think part of what makes it so convincing is that he isn’t afraid to be high pitched and genuinely Scream rather than yell#like. he is clearly immune to being put off by ‘you scream like a girl’ rhetoric#I think a lot of male actors avoid screaming and screeching like that for that internalized reason when. if you wanna be as realistic as#possible. a scream is high pitched. if you’re scared for your fucking life it’s just involuntary#I can also see it being uncommon due to difficulties getting that sound adequately recorded but yeah anyway you get my point#tldr: george rexstrew is great at disturbingly realistic screaming and I applaud him for that#I really hope he didn’t have to retake that part too many times..#his poor throat……….#george rexstrew#edwin#edwin payne#dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives spoilers
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shipping chart thoughts
(billford always happens and they always break up. ford was obsessed when bill was his muse, then bill is obsessed after they’re no longer together and he realizes what he lost) (this dynamic is just canon, really)
(fiddauthor is always present at some point but in one route they end up together after canon events, and in another route fidd moves on) (it’s possible that they had a thing in college but consider it “typical college experimentation” because it’s the 70s and denial is strong. they still go through canon events)
(fiddlestan only happens during the fiddlestan route. otherwise canon events stay the same and they barely actually interact with each other. in the fiddlestan route they work together in the 80s and grow old together)
(billstan isn’t really romantic but it is a one-sided obsession. bill just can’t stop obsessing over the stans… for very different reasons…) (dare i say an unrequited kismesis dynamic?)
(ford and stan are brothers. that’s it. leave them out of the shipping dynamics.)
(fiddlebill isn’t really included here but i feel like the only way this would happen is if bill was possessing ford and wanted to fuck with fidd by using his crush on ford against him) (this one’s basically only possible if it’s fiddauthor-adjacent)
#do u see the vision#i can’t choose between fiddauthor & fiddlestan so i just have 2 different versions in my head where they both get to be endgame#also i enjoy billford but specifically when they end up in a terrible divorce#bill redemption and billford getting back together is fun and all and i enjoy content about it but. to Me that isn’t how it goes lol#i want that triangle to suffer. amen#billstan and fiddlebill have no shot at getting together in my mind sorry#bill being miserable and hating stan so much he becomes obsessive & being jealous of fidd are funny to me though#anyway. to me both fiddauthor & fiddlestan get to end with them as happily gay old men#lowkey don’t remember if i’ve posted something like this before so if i did then pretend i didn’t#😇😇😇#gravity falls#billford#fiddauthor#ford²#fiddlesix#fiddlestan#billstan#??#fiddlebill#????#i guess?#sorry 😭 not really but i’m talking about those 2 so i’m tagging them#i’m not tagging the brothers though. stay away please#stanford pines#bill cipher#fiddleford mcgucket#stanley pines
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"Suffer No Fools" - Shiver vs. Marina Analysis
It's been a few days since "Suffer No Fools" released, but I wanted to go ahead and release my analysis of Shiver's and Marina's verse since that's the one that has caused the most discussion within the fandom. I've seen a lot of debate over Marina's section in particular, with people unsure whether she was being sincere or sarcastic, and I think the actual answer is a little more complicated than one or the other, at least with regards to the first couplet of lines both she and Shiver sing. Of course, people are free to interpret this song however they wish, but after seeing numerous interpretations I personally didn't vibe with, I just wanted to put my own out there, breaking it down line by line.
So! Here we go.
Exchange 1:
Shiver: "Your haunting voice -- there's no escape. How nice it must be for your fans." Marina: "You're far too kind! I love your vibe. I can learn so much from your style."
Analyzing from dialogue only:
Shiver is insulting Marina's voice by calling it haunting and saying there is no escape, insinuating she wishes there was one. She says how nice it must be for Marina's fans, again implying that she isn't one.
Marina says that she loves Shiver's vibe, which on the surface could be a compliment, but given the context (a music battle) it could also be a Mean Girl "ooh I love your [thing] :)" passive-aggressive drawing-attention-to-something-ugly insult. More direct though, is the "I can learn so much from your style"; you can learn what not to do from someone just as much as you can learn what to do from someone. Marina's engaging in plausible deniability here.
HOWEVER. Lyrics are NOT the only thing that need to be analyzed from this first verse, which is arguably the MOST important exchange between these two. Instead, we need to look at how these lines are delivered.
Shiver is singing in a traditional Japanese folk singing style, specifically a style based on Shima-uta, which her voice actress has a background singing in. Unfortunately, I don't know the actual term for this style of singing, only that it's not kakegoe, something Shiver also does that is different from this. Anyway, in these lines specifically Shiver is singing in her Shima-uta style, a style that she has presumably been practicing since she was a small child, a style that is probably culturally significant to the Hohojiro clan. Singing in this style is not something that just anyone can do. It's completely different from singing in a (for lack of a better word) "western" style. The way you breathe is completely different. The way you incorporate your voice into your breathing is completely different. So by singing in this style, which Shiver has been doing practically her whole life and which, presumably, only she of the four there can do, Shiver is FLEXING on Marina regardless of what lyrics she chooses to sing.
But then Marina, who grew up under the domes in Inkadia, who presumably has never heard Shima-uta before she started listening to Deep Cut and heard Shiver sing, who presumably has had absolutely no training whatsoever on this style of song . . . mimics it perfectly and flexes on Shiver right back.
Could Marina's words to Shiver be interpreted as passive-aggressive in turn? Yes. But does it matter? No, not really. Because in this first verse, Marina's ACTUAL comeback is to take the style of singing that Shiver has been perfecting her entire life and throw it right back in her face despite having never (as far as we or Shiver know) practiced it herself. Shiver was flexing by presumably doing something Marina couldn't do, only for Marina to do it flawlessly, being every bit as divine with a voice so fine as Pearl said she was previously. Marina says "I love your vibe" so she takes it. Marina says "I have so much to learn from you" but does she really, when she can already do exactly what Shiver can, and has, just now, right in front of her?
And Shiver noticed, hence:
Exchange 2:
Shiver: "You remind me of my neighbor's little daughter . . . What's that saying? 'Octo see, octo do.'" Marina: "Glad you approve -- your praise has left me moved. Thanks to your notes, I'll find my groove!"
Shiver drops the Shima-uta singing, because now there's no point. Marina can also sing in that style, so it's no longer a flex. Shiver lost ground on that one, so instead we're back to the same (again, for lack of a better word) "regular" style of singing that everyone else is using. For that reason, we can go back to analyzing purely based on the words alone.
Shiver is calling Marina a copycat, essentially, because Marina copied her Shima-uta singing style in the previous verse (hence why Shiver had to drop it, as previously noted). Marina then gives her "glad you approve -- your praise has left me moved" . . . basically noting that by Shiver accusing her of copying, Shiver is saying that Marina -- someone who just tried the singing style off the cuff right there on the stage for the first time -- was just as good as Shiver, someone who has trained in that style her whole life. The audience saw for themselves that Marina was able to emulate the style, but Shiver saying, "you copied me!" is basically admitting that Marina was just as good as her in Shiver's own eyes, and Shiver is a pro. That's Shiver's aggravation handing Marina the win and Marina smiling wide as she accepts it.
Exchange 3:
Shiver: "Oh, look at the time. Isn't it getting late?" Marina: "Not at all! I could go on like this all night long."
This one doesn't even really need an analysis. For all that she prides herself on being "so cool even sharks call her cold-blooded," Shiver is known for being easily irritated and riled when she's losing due to her competitive nature. Marina successfully got under her skin, and this is her trying to end the battle fast because she didn't have any further comebacks. Marina, meanwhile, gives the classic "I could go on all night" because she's not riled at all, and is instead perfectly comfortable in this environment, knows what she's doing, and has had the upper hand from the start.
It goes back to another post I made about Experience vs. Inexperience. Shiver and Frye are still new idols, whereas Pearl and Marina have been at this for a long while. And while off the stage Marina is a sweet, kind, gentle person who will go out of her way to help others, and can sometimes be a little spacey or naive, she's also a 23-year-old literal genius who has been in the music industry for years now and knows full well what a rap / music battle is and knows her way around a stage. Personally, I found it to be a little infantilizing to insinuate that she "didn't realize Shiver was insulting her," when not only do I think she knew full well, but also she was the one with the upper hand not because of sick burns (that's Pearl's department), but because of sheer innate musical talent.
But those are just my thoughts! Everyone else is free to have their own.
#splatoon#splatoon 3#suffer no fools#off the hook#deep cut#shiver hohojiro#marina ida#keep in mind that Shiver is my favorite Deep Cut member please#i mean no disrespect to her in any of this#i really do just think it's her inexperience in the music industry etc#and Frye's as well#i think that in Splatoon 4 we'll see that Shiver and Frye have matured some & made some headway in their own careers#(and Big Man too ofc but tbh he's already there with the maturity imo)#(hence his collabing w/ Squid Sisters & non-hostility toward OtH)#then again maybe Deep Cut wants to stay indie. idk! we'll see
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The Bronze Targaryen - 5
Summary - Two and a half moons after (Y/N)'s arrival in Kingslanding he must grapple with his new title as a dragonlord, wedding festivites, his grandsire's sudden illness, and his relationship with his father. The prince tries to balance all of this as the royal wedding looms over him.
Warnings - minor injuries, general HOTD warnings, drinking, canon character death, consummation scene (its minor and a fade to black)
I have decided to mold the lore to my own desires because there is almost next to nothing on House Royce during this time period. Also was going to break this into two parts because its so long but wanted all the wedding festvites to take place during one chapter.
(Y/N) winced as the maester prodded at his nose, the maester made humming noises as he examined the prince’s injuries. He applied a few plaster’s to (Y/N)’s nose, before wrapping it in soaked wool.
“His nose shall heal fine, my prince.”
Daemon nodded, “Thank you, you may go.”
The maester bowed to the two princes, gathering his supplies and leaving (Y/N) alone with his father. Daemon watched as the man left the room, and waited until the doors were shut before turning on his son. He crossed his arms leaning back against a chair, and (Y/N) braced himself for a lecture.
“How are you feeling?”
(Y/N) blinked, “What?”
Daemon pushed himself off the chair, making his way over toward (Y/N). He slowly reache
d his hand out, gently tracing the scratches and bruises on (Y/N)’s face, and (Y/N) was too shocked at his father’s actions to react. “Are you in pain?”
“I’m fine,” (Y/N) said, looking up at his father. “I’ve had worse.”
Daemon frowned, and (Y/N) wondered how much his mother had told him of his childhood mishaps. “What were you doing so far off Rosby Road?”
(Y/N) flushed, “I- uh, snuck out.”
“You snuck out?” His father’s face lit up, and he took a step back laughing and shaking his head. “How did your uncle react?”
“Well he doubled my guard for one.” (Y/N) said, remembering his Uncle’s fury when (Y/N) showed up the next morning, face covered in blood and dirt. He had some choice words for the young heir, and (Y/N) was confident Daemon had heard his brother’s opinion on the matter as soon as he stepped foot into the keep. “But he was more interested in the dragon than my misbehavior.”
“Ah,” Daemon smirked. “Yes, it must have been quite a shock.”
(Y/N) rolled his eyes at his father, “I know you did something.”
“What did I do, (Y/N)?” Daemon asked, raising an eyebrow at his son. “I did not drag Vermithor to you, or you to him for that matter. Vermithor made his choice.”
“And it’s just a coincidence that as soon as you leave for Dragonstone, Vermithor leaves and seeks me out randomly.”
“Perhaps it was fate.” Daemon shrugged.
“You don’t expect me to believe that.”
Daemon approached (Y/N), placed his hands on his shoulders. “It does not matter what you believe, all that matters are the facts. And the facts are that you have claimed Vermithor, you should be proud.”
“I did not wish to claim a dragon, I never have.” (Y/N) said, and his father’s face hardened.
“You are my son.” Daemon said, and (Y/N) hissed as his grip on his shoulder tightened. “You are a dragon, you cannot escape that.”
His father’s face softened at (Y/N)’s expression. He released the boy, and seemed to hesitate before smoothing his hair back out of his face, “You should rest, you have had quite the number of shocks these past few days.”
(Y/N) watched as father turned on his heel, and exited the chambers gently shutting the doors behind him.
“Lykirī.” (Y/N) smiled, as Vermithor pushed his snout into his chest. He pet the dragon with a gloved hand, laughing as the dragon continued to push him. “You must relax if you wish to fly.”
(Y/N) had spent almost a week avoiding Vermithor after the dragon chased him down in the woods. Hoping that if he ignored him long enough the dragon would take the hint and leave, but eventually the Dragonkeepers sought him out, telling him that Vermithor had been untamable since he’d arrived in the Dragonpit. So (Y/N) resigned himself to the life of a dragonrider. He’d spent every day since then with the dragon, slowly but surely adjusting to his presence, and Vermithor had calmed drastically with (Y/N)’s visits.
(Y/N) had taken to flying easily, much to his father’s delight and, as much as he hid it, his own. Although he had felt sick at the idea of claiming a dragon at first, he had come to find pride in the quick developments in his relationship with Vermithor.
Rhaenyra too found delight in her betrothed’s new life.
Anytime (Y/N) was free Rhaenyra was dragging him to the dragonpit, insisting Vermithor and Syrax go flying together. Viserys, at first happy to have another dragon in the family, soon grew inpatient with the two teens. Irritated at their constant absence from court, but (Y/N) paid him little mind. (Y/N) had no real place in his court, and he had not yet raised Rhaenyra, his heir, from the role of cupbearer.
(Y/N) saddled Vermithor, leaning down to whisper to the dragon, “Sōvēs”
The wind was cool against his face, blowing the strands of hair that had escaped his bun around in his face. (Y/N) had been wishing for clean and open air since he’d arrived in Kingslanding, this just isn’t how he expected to find it. Vermithor rumbled under him, and he laughed, leaning down so that he could rub the dragon’s neck.
“I know,” (Y/N) spoke, almost shouting to be heard against the wind. “I am sorry I was late.”
He’d been stuck in court all day, listening to his father and uncle bicker over details of the upcoming royal wedding. His uncle, ever the peacekeeper, had wanted Rhaenyra and (Y/N) to be married in the faith of the seven, as he was to Aemma and later Alicent, his father had other ideas however.
“I do not worship the New Gods, uncle.” (Y/N) pointed out.
“It is the tradition of the royal family.” The Grand Maester spoke up, as the other lords of the chamber had gone silent as soon as the tensions started to rise, seemingly fearful of angering any member of the royal family. Not that (Y/N) could blame them, he’d heard stories of his father’s infamous fits of anger.
“(Y/N) follows the Old Gods like his mother,” His father looked pained to speak the words, but (Y/N) gave him an appreciative nod all the same. “And I have not known Rhaenyra to spend her days in the sept. We are Targaryens, they should marry in the tradition of Old Valyria.”
“The faith-”
“Fuck the faith.” Daemon spat. “I will not ask my son to forsake his gods so that some fat septon is comfortable, and we cannot bring a weirwood here so this is the only equitable compromise I see.”
His uncle and the members of his council had grumbled at the idea, but eventually they conceded knowing this was an argument they could not win without insulting someone. His uncle dismissed them all, brows pinched in frustration. (Y/N) had caught his father’s arm on the way out, stopping him from walking away.
“Thank you.” He did not meet his father’s eyes. “I know faith is not important to you, but it is to me so- just- thank you.”
His father gently cupped his cheek, bringing (Y/N)’s eyes up to meet his. His father smiled at him, “You do not have to thank me. It is no secret that I hold no love for your mother’s house, but you do, and you are my blood. I will always defend you.”
His father’s words still hung over his head by the time (Y/N) and Vermithor had returned to the Dragonpit.
Rhaenyra was waiting for him as he dismounted, accompanied by a slew of Kingsguard and a royal carriage. The Kingsguard watched Vermithor warily as he grumbled, huffing as though he could sense (Y/N)’s apprehension at the sight laid out before him.
“Lykirī.” (Y/N) whispered, urging the bronze beast to return to the Dragonpit. Vermithor huffed one last time at the men, causing (Y/N) to chuckle, before returning. (Y/N) walked over to Rhaenyra, untying his hair and letting it tumble down to his shoulders. “That is quite the party, Nyra.”
She sighed, “Our presence is required at the keep. We must be readied to greet the lords arriving at the court.”
A Kingsguard opened the door of the carriage, and (Y/N) offered his hand for Rhaenyra to take. She took his hand, using it as leverage to step into the carriage and (Y/N) followed suit, taking the seat across from her.
“What troubles you?”
Rhaenyra blinked at (Y/N), “I am not troubled.”
“Rhaenyra,” (Y/N) said, smiling slightly, “I can tell something is troubling you. Is it tonight?”
“No,” She shook her head, leaning forward and placing her hand on (Y/N)’s knee. “No, it’s not tonight, it is this morning. My father is still blind to the schemes of some of those present in his court, they seek to undermine our family in favor of the Hightower children.”
“Your father will not claim Aegon over you. You are his heir, you will be Queen and no scheming lord can change that.”
Rhaenyra smiled, squeezing his knee slightly before releasing him and sitting back. (Y/N) turned to look out of the carriage, leaning back into the cushions and closing his eyes. He heard Rhaenyra chuckle softly, before the exhaustion of the day overtook him and he slipped away to sleep.
“You seem nervous.” (Y/N) turned, coming face to face with his cousin. He gave his best attempt at a smile, he fiddled with the collar of his shirt, and Gerold stepped forward. He adjusted the leather jerkin, allowing (Y/N) to breathe easier. “It is odd to see you in such formal attire.”
(Y/N) laughed, “At least they don’t have dragons on them.”
“No? I have heard a rumor that you’ve become quite the dragonlord in your absence.”
(Y/N) reddened, ducking his head slightly, “It was an accident.”
His cousin laughed, patting him on the shoulder, “There is no need to be nervous, cousin.”
His cousin smiled at him one last time before joining his other cousin in the precession line. (Y/N) frowned at the sight of Gunthor, he’d been informed when his family and their court had arrived that his grandsire had fallen ill not long after (Y/N) departed, and in his heirs absence his cousin Gunthor, second in line, had taken his place as regent. His grandsire had been too ill to make the journey to Kingslanding, sending (Y/N) his well wishes and Gunthor in his place.
A sudden hand on his shoulder startled him out of his thoughts. He turned his head to catch his father smiling, he squeezed his shoulder. “The tailors did well, you look like a prince.”
“I am a prince.” (Y/N) said, and his father’s smile widened.
“Yes, you are. Remember that, as there are those that would hope you forget.” His father nodded in the direction of Gunthor, and (Y/N)’s expression soured.
“I do not trust him, I cannot say why but-” (Y/N) frowned, staring at his cousin’s interactions with the Valemen around him. “He did not write to me to tell me of my grandsire’s illness. I am the heir, I should be regent, not him, and yet in my absence he swooped in.”
His father nodded, “Good. You must recognize the snakes before they strike.”
His father stepped in front of him, blocking his view of the Valemen. “I am aware that we do not have the best relationship-”
(Y/N) snorted, and Daemon laughed rolling his eyes. “Yes I know, but you are my son, my blood. And I would like to be not just your sire, but your father as well. I was not there in your youth, let me be there now.”
(Y/N) frowned, hesitating. He swallowed before finally speaking, “May we speak of this after the feast?”
“Of course,” His father lightly touched his cheek, “Come we should join the others.”
He and his father took their places at the front of the party, Gunthor to (Y/N)’s left and Daemon to his right. (Y/N) took a deep breath as the doors opened, keeping his gaze on the two banners bearing the sigils of House Targaryen and House Royce hung in the back of the Great Hall as his family entered.
“Ser Gunthor of House Royce. Acting Lord of Runestone, Keeper of the Gates of the Moon. And Prince Daemon Targaryen. And his son and heir to Runestone Prince (Y/N) Targaryen the future King Consort.”
The guests of the hall stood, clapping as they walked down to the high table. The amount of eyes on him made (Y/N) uneasy, but he kept his head high, posture exuding the confidence expected of one of his station. (Y/N) made eye contact with Rhaenyra at the end of the hall who offered him a comforting smile, he nodded to her.
They paused at the beginning of the steps, bowing to the King, before Rhaenyra stepped around the table making her way toward the crowd. (Y/N) stepped forward, meeting her halfway, he took her hand as his father had instructed him when going over the etiquette required of him at the feast.
“You must act every bit the king you will one day be, no matter how unused to these events you may be.” His father had told him. (Y/N) scoffed at the advice, he was raised to be the Lord of Runestone, he knew how to act at a feast.
As (Y/N) pressed a chaste kiss to Rhaenyra’s hand, and claps echoed around the hall, he cursed himself for not taking his father’s advice seriously. He had never known a feast quite like this, hosting the most important lords of the whole of Westeros. Lords he’d never met before like the Lannisters, Hightowers, and Velaryons. He took his place by Rhaenyra’s side at the table, his father and cousin taking the seats by his left.
He let out a breath as he sat down, scanning the crowd as his uncle started to speak. Rhaenyra grabbed his hand under the table, squeezing it in reassurance, it was only then that he allowed himself to relax, if only slightly.
"Be welcome,” His uncle smiled out at the crowd, “As we join together in celebration. Tonight is only its beginning. We honor one of Westeros' oldest houses, and a fierce ally to the crown, House Royce. Just as House Targaryen reaches back to the blood of Old Valyria, House Royce reaches back to the blood of the first men. With House Targaryen and H-"
Viserys paused, and everyone averted their gaze to where his lingered. (Y/N) tensed once more as Queen Alicent Hightower made her entrance into the hall. The color of her dress a clear statement to anyone who knew any of the histories. Reluctantly (Y/N) made his way to his feet with the rest of the guests, he shot an amused glance to his side where his father still sat, eyes narrowed at the young queen.
Alicent addressed Rhaenyra, “Congratulations, step-daughter. What a blessing this is for you.”
Rhaenyra gave no indication of thanks, and Alicent kissed Viserys on the cheek before taking her seat beside him.
He’d not yet had any real interactions with the young queen, only knowing things told to him by Rhaenyra and Daemon. He had taken them with a grain of salt, wanting to make his own judgment of the girl, but with the blatant display she’d just shown to the lord’s of Westeros, (Y/N) decided that maybe Rhaenyra and Daemon had been right in their worries. Perhaps the Hightowers did have their own intentions with the crown.
“Please be seated.”
(Y/N) traced the rim of his empty goblet as his uncle stood silently, only picking his eyes up from the table when he started to speak.
"With House Targaryen and House Royce united, once again, I hope to herald in a second Age of Dawn and Dragons in Westeros.” Viserys spoke, and the hall erupted into applause.
“And after tonight’s small affair,” Laughter sounded through the halls, and (Y/N) had to stop himself from rolling his eyes. “Seven days of tournament and feasting! And at the end of it all, a royal wedding. Between my daughter, my heir, your future queen. And Prince (Y/N) Targaryen, heir to Runestone.”
As Viserys sat, and everyone else followed suit, Rhaenyra and (Y/N) rose from theirs. They approached the middle of the aisle, and began their dance. (Y/N) had never been much of a dancer, and suffered through the lessons given to both he and Rhaenyra.
“I feel like a fool.” (Y/N) whispered as Rhaenyra and he side stepped each other.
“You are doing wonderfully.” Rhaenyra whispered back, taking her place back to back with him. “Ignore everyone, pretend it is just you and me.”
When they finished, bowing to one another the halls once again erupted in applause. (Y/N) took Rhaenyra’s hands in his, kissing them softly as she gave him a knowing smile. As the rest of the courtiers took their places on the dance floor, (Y/N) tried to escape back to the high table, longing for a cup of wine. He was stopped before he could reach the table much to his dismay.
“My Prince.” The lady, who (Y/N) did not recognize, blushed, bowing to him. “May I have this dance?”
(Y/N) gaped at her, before remembering who and where he was. “Yes, yes of course Lady-”
“Reyne.”
“Lady Reyne. (Y/N) smiled, mourning his cup of wine. He gestured toward the lords and lady’s dancing, “Lead the way.”
He had to dance with five young ladies before he finally found his escape. He flopped, very unprince-like into his seat, immediately grabbing the cup of wine laid out in front of him. His father laughed, waving over a servant to refill the cup once (Y/N) had finished.
“Not a fan of dancing?” Daemon smirked, “Or is it the ladies asking you to dance you are not fond of?”
“Both.” (Y/N) spoke over the rim of his cup, “They only wish to dance with me because I am to marry Rhaenyra, if I were just the heir to Runestone they’d pay me little mind.”
“I don’t know about that,” Daemon said, “You are a comely young man.”
(Y/N) smirked, “Ladies don’t wish to dance with comely young men.”
“Neither do lords.” His father raised his eyebrows, humor sparkling in his eyes.
(Y/N) shrugged, smiling at his father’s tone, “You have been talking to Rhaenyra.”
Daemon leaned close, patting his son on the leg, “I am just glad you two have made this match work for the both of you.”
“We are not married yet, father.” (Y/N) reminded, “Things may yet just fall apart.”
Before his father could speak, another lady made her way to the table. She bowed to both (Y/N) and Daemon. “Prince (Y/N), may I have this dance?”
Daemon snickered, taking (Y/N)’s cup out of his hand. “Well go on, dance.”
His father had disappeared from the table when (Y/N) had finished, and his cousins were wrapped up in conversation with a lord (Y/N) did not recognize. He made his way to the sidelines, stealing a full cup of wine, and pressing his back against the wall to avoid being spotted.
He spied his father in the middle of the dancing, twirling Laena Velayron around, and (Y/N) frowned. His father’s wife, (Y/N)’s own mother, had died only three moons ago, and as far as (Y/N) knew Laena Velayron was engaged to some Brasvosi.
“You would never know this feast was in your honor the way you frown.”
(Y/N) turned to face the owner of the voice, smiling as Ser Harwin took a place next to him. “Ser Harwin.”
“Are you not enjoying the feast, my prince?” Harwin smiled, leaning closer to the prince.
“I am enjoying the wine, some of the company less so.” (Y/N) said, and Harwin laughed.
“I understand the sentiment.”
(Y/N) brought the cup up to his lips, smiling around its rim. Harwin grabbed an empty cup, flagging down a servant who filled both of their cups. (Y/N) watched as his father continued to dance with Laena, and Rhaenyra moved through the crowd, followed closely by Ser Laenor.
Harwin raised his cup up, and (Y/N) followed suit, “To your marriage.”
“My marriage.” (Y/N) and Harwin laughed as their cups met.
(Y/N) spent the rest of the feast by Harwin’s side. Harwin had stopped drinking by his fourth cup, watching in amusement as the prince got drunker and drunker with each cup of wine. As the feast died down, and the lords and ladies took their leave, Harwin had found (Y/N) a seat, and was watching him ramble fondly.
“I do not care for this court, Harwin.” (Y/N) sighed, leaning his head back. “It was simpler on Runestone, but here, here there are too many lords I do not know. I do not trust them.”
Harwin laughed, patting the prince’s leg, “Perhaps a hall filled with those lords is not the place to have this conversation, my prince.”
“(Y/N).” (Y/N) said, straightening. He looked Harwin in the eye, placing his hand on top of the knights. “Please call me (Y/N).”
Harwin’s eyes softened, “Of course, (Y/N).”
(Y/N) smiled at the knight, keeping his hand where it was before two twin coughs behind him startled him. (Y/N) jumped, spilling his cup of wine onto himself. Harwin laughed as (Y/N) turned to look at the people behind him. Daemon and Rhaenyra stood above him, both with twin amused smiles on their faces. They had never looked more related, (Y/N) mused.
“Having fun?” Rhaenyra asked.
“I was informed that this feast was for me, and that I should try to have some fun.”
Daemon laughed at his son's words, grabbing his shoulders and pushing him up out of the seat. “I think it’s time you take your leave.”
Harwin stood, grabbing (Y/N) to help Daemon keep the prince upright. Rhaenyra sighed, a smile still gracing her face.
“I am glad you enjoyed yourself, (Y/N).” Rhaenyra said. “But perhaps next time you can entertain yourself with less wine.”
(Y/N) stepped forward, stumbling slightly and both Harwin and Daemon’s eyes widened as he moved. Freeing himself from the men’s grasps, (Y/N) approached Rhaenyra pressing a kiss to her cheek.
“I am sorry that I left you on your lonesome.” (Y/N) said, letting his hand rest on her arm. Rhaenyra smiled, at his words or his drunkenness (Y/N) could not tell.
She pressed her palm to his cheek, “You are fine. I enjoyed myself plenty.”
(Y/N) nodded. “Good, because this is for both of us. So we should both enjoy ourselves.”
“(Y/N),” Rhaenyra laughed, shaking her head. “Let us get you to your chambers.”
Daemon and Harwin grabbed one of his arms, ignoring (Y/N)’s protests that he could walk by himself. Rhaenyra followed the three men, laughing at (Y/N)’s attempts to break free from the two men, and his drunken rambles to all three of the people accompanying him. When they finally reached the room, with some incident much to Harwin and Daemon’s dismay and Rhaenyra’s delight, Daemon turned to Harwin.
“I have him from here, Ser Harwin will you please make sure the princess makes it back to her room.”
Harwin nodded, and Rhaenyra pressed a kiss to (Y/N)’s cheek. “I will see you tomorrow at the tourney.”
“Goodnight, (Y/N), Prince Daemon.”
(Y/N) and Daemon bid the both of them goodnight, before the guards at (Y/N)’s door open the doors to his chamber and Daemon practically dragged his son into the room. Daemon instructe (Y/N) to lift his arms, and when he did he undid the jerkin and brought the tunic over his head, tossing it to the side.
“Undo your boots.”
(Y/N) complied, and when he was done Daemon led him toward the bed. When (Y/N) was seated on the bed, Daemon turned to leave, but (Y/N) grabbed his arm and stopped him in his tracks. “We have not had our conversation.”
Daemon smiled, “Rest, we will have it tomorrow I promise.”
(Y/N) nodded, “Alright.”
Daemon pressed him down into the bed slowly, pushing the blankets back so that (Y/N) could get underneath them. He brushed (Y/N)’s sweaty hair out of his face, smoothing it down not unlike his mother used to do when he was ill. (Y/N) leaned into the touch, and Daemon smiled.
“Sleep.”
(Y/N) closed his eyes, slipping quickly into rest. But not before he felt the ghost of lips pressed against his forehead.
(Y/N) hated himself the next morning.
He closed his eyes as he bathed, letting the warm water alleviate some of his migraine. He dressed slowly, groaning as a loud knock sounded throughout the room.
“Come in.”
Daemon strolled into the room, taking a look at his son’s appearance before chuckling. “How are you feeling?” (Y/N) just glared at him, causing Daemon to laugh again. He held his hands up in mock surrender. “Sorry.”
Daemon placed a small vile in front of him, and (Y/N) raised an eyebrow.
“It’s watered down dreamwine,” Daemon said, “For your head.”
“Oh,” (Y/N) took the vial, opened it and sniffed it a bit before downing it. “Thank you.”
Daemon nodded, turning to leave.
“Are you not here to continue our conversation?” (Y/N) called out, and Daemon turned back to face him.
“I just wanted to see if you were well.”
“I am.” (Y/N) smiled, “I just have a headache, I will live.”
Daemon nodded, taking a seat across from (Y/N). He looked nervous at the thought of continuing their conversation from before the feast, it endeared (Y/N) to see his father’s usual tough exterior come crumbling down at the idea of a conversation.
Giving his father some respite, (Y/N) changed the topic of conversation, “I saw you dancing with Laena Velayron last night. Is she not already betrothed?”
“A man cannot dance with a lady?” Daemon asked, although his expression gave him away.
“Not when that man is you, father.” (Y/N) said. “Do you wish to get remarried? You have no real need for any more heirs.”
Daemon shrugged, “Perhaps I wish for company.”
“You are lonely?” (Y/N) almost laughed at the thought. He could not imagine the so-called Lord of Flea Bottom wanting for the comforts of a lady.
“Well my only son prefers to spend his time at Runestone pretending I don’t exist.”
(Y/N)’s mood soured, and he frowned. He turned away from his father, crossing his arms like he wasn’t a man of seven and ten and instead a boy of nine. “You did not give me a choice. I was just saving myself from the pain I would feel when you inevitably wouldn’t arrive.”
“I know.” Daemon ran his hand down his face. “I did not mean that I apologize.”
“You know you have missed my last ten name days.” (Y/N) whispered.
“I know.” Daemon said. “I sent you presents but I know that does not make up for my absence.”
“I never received any gifts.”
Daemon looked up in confusion, his expression contorted before he let out a bitter laugh. “No, of course you didn’t. Your mother probably never gave them to you. She never held any love for me.”
“I remember you did not hold much for her either.” (Y/N) spat. “She told me that you fled Runestone the night after I was born, and did not return until my first name day only to flee that night as well.”
“I was a boy, no older than you are now.”
“That is no excuse!”
“No it’s not and I have regretted my decisions every day! I was scared, (Y/N)!” Daemon stood. “When I found out your mother was pregnant I was terrified. We held no love toward each other, and I feared that our hatred toward each other would impact you. I was an idiot boy so I fled. Then you were born, and I was still just this boy, and you were so pure and I could not corrupt that with my hatred so I feld again. I fled again and again, because I was scared I could not be a good father to you, as I could not be a good husband to your mother and she could not be a good wife to me. When I finally realized what an imbecile I had been it was too late, you had no idea who I was.”
(Y/N) remembered the day of his fourth name day vaguely.
“(Y/N),” His mother gestured to a skinny man with pale hair and eyes like (Y/N). “Your father is here to see you.”
The man approached him, and (Y/N) stepped back, placing his mother between him and this stranger. The man’s face fell, and he stumbled back.
“Perhaps it would be best if I left.”
“Daemon-”
“It’s fine.” The man handed a wrapped package to his mother. “Give this to him.”
"You're running? Again?"
"Look at him Rhea-"
"No, run. Like you always do."
The man opened his mouth to speak, but he seemed to think better of it. He turned on his heel and left, and (Y/N)'s mother scoffed.
He had seen his father only a few times after that day, and their meetings had always been brief and curt. His mother had certainly not helped (Y/N)’s view of his father, only ever nodding and staying silent when (Y/N) would complain. He had once asked her why Daemon did not stay for more than a night, and his mother had replied that his father hated the Vale and many of those who resided there. It had crushed (Y/N) to hear, but after learning of the gifts his father had sent that he had not received he could only wonder how much of his own hatred for his father was just what he learned to feel from his mother.
“I am sorry for my absence.” Daemon said. “I can never make up those lost years, and I know my youth and stubbornness is no excuse but-”
His father took a deep breath, “(Y/N), I wish- if you would allow, for us to start again. I know I cannot ask you to forget the years I was not there for you, but allow me to start again.”
“I understand.” (Y/N) said, “I cannot forgive-”
“-I wouldn’t ask you to-”
“-but I understand. I understand more than I did at the very least.” (Y/N) said, and the tension in his father’s shoulders eased. (Y/N) smiled, it was probably a bit pained, (Y/N)’s head throbbing even more with the revelations of the morning. “We can try to start again. I make no promises, but we can try.”
His father smiled, a genuine smile that (Y/N) had never seen across his father’s face before. “Thank you.”
“You are not participating, (Y/N)?”
(Y/N) looked at the queen from where he was seated next to Rhaenyra, shaking his head politely. “I am not a knight, Queen Alicent.”
Alicent looked him up and down, the motion making him squirm a bit. She did not respond but she nodded, turning her gaze back to the tourney fields.
His father was not participating in the tourney either, instead taking a seat in the stands. Ser Harwin was participating though, much to Rhaenyra’s delight. (Y/N) did not find much delight in tourney’s, bloodshed was not a game to be played.
In all honesty, (Y/N) was bored watching the tourney. Ser Criston had won, wearing Alicent’s favor which (Y/N) could tell irritated Rhaenyra. By the time the melee rolled around the next day (Y/N) was dreading spending the hot day in the stands of the tourney grounds.
“May I have your favor, princess.”
Rhaenyra laughed, giving Harwin a small piece of cloth. He tucked it into his armor, turning to (Y/N) who smiled.
“I don’t have a favor,” (Y/N) said, and Harwin smiled, cheeks reddening slightly. “But I wish you luck.”
“Thank you, (Y/N).”
Their luck and favors did Harwin no favors in the melee. Rhaenyra had shrieked when Cristion’s morningstar made contact with Harwin’s collarbone, shattering it and his elbow. But the worst injury of the day had been to Ser Joffrey, and (Y/N) could not get Laenor’s cries out of his mind even as he fell asleep that night.
There were no more tourney’s after that as a solemn mood had fallen over the royal court. Ser Harwin would live (Y/N) and Rhaenyra discovered, but Ser Joffrey was not likely to. And as it happened six days later, Joffrey passed, and Ser Laenor was inconsolable. Rhaenyra and (Y/N) both tried, even if (Y/N) was not as close with his cousin as Rhaenyra was, but in the end the knight took his leave back to Driftmark before the wedding even happened.
(Y/N) spent the night before the wedding with his father. His father told him the story of his wedding with (Y/N)’s mother, describing how (Y/N)’s grandfather, Baelon, had to drag Daemon to Runestone.
“If it is any comfort,” (Y/N) mused. “You had to drag me to Kingslanding.”
Daemon laughed, “I did. But you will have a much happier marriage than your mother and I.”
(Y/N) lifted his cup, “One can hope.”
The wedding itself snuck up on (Y/N), the events of the week leading up to it not allowing him to worry about the ceremony. It was only now that he was dressed in red and gold Valyrian robes, standing atop Rhaenys’ hill, surrounded by the lords and ladies of Westeros, that the nerves started to reach him.
He could hear the distant roars of the dragon’s in the dragon pit as the priest spoke. (Y/N) lifted the dragonglass blade, handed to him by the priest. He made quick eye contact with his father, who only nodded, before slicing Rhaenyra’s bottom lip. He gathered the blood from the cut, dragging his thumb down her forehead. Rhaenyra took her own blade, repeating the action on (Y/N) before slicing her palm.(Y/N) dragged the blade against his palm, taking Rhaenyra’s hand in his. They joined their blood as the priest spoke.
(Y/N) took the cup handed to him, drinking from it, before handing it to Rhaenyra who did the same. The priest finished his rites, and (Y/N) cupped Rhaenyra’s cheek, he could taste the blood as he brought her lips to meet his. (Y/N) rested his forehead against Rhaenyra’s as cheers were sounded around them. When they pulled away and faced the crowd, he could see his father and uncle smiling.
Their hands were wrapped by the priest, covering the open wounds, and they descended down the hill. Rhaenyra did not let go of his hand as they went, smiling at him as he helped her into the carriage waiting for them. “Thank you, valzȳrys.”
Both he and Rhaenyra were dressed in their small clothes separately. He’d been offered food and wine before he was brought over to Rhaenyra’s chambers, but he turned them down. He did not wish to spend his wedding night addled by wine.
Viserys had insisted on a bedding ceremony, and Daemon had no qualms with the idea. But both (Y/N) and Rhaenyra protested. The meeting had ended unsuccessfully, but (Y/N) suspected Rhaenyra had private words with her father, as by the next meeting the topic had been dropped completely and it was agreed there would be no such ceremony.
The doors to Rhaenyra’s chambers were opened by the guards, and (Y/N) stepped into the room. Rhaenyra was sitting by the vanity, brushing her hair in a velvet dress that hung loosely from her body. (Y/N) felt like a hedge knight in his plain cloth clothing.
She smiled at him, placing the brush down on the vanity. She glided across the room, coming to stand in front of him. “Valzȳrys.”
“Ābrazȳrys”
Rhaenyra gently grasped the laces of his tunic, undoing them slowly. She kept eye contact with (Y/N) as she did so, letting his tongue wet her lower lip as the laces were fully loosened. (Y/N) grabbed the bottom of his tunic, bringing it up over his head, and placing it on a chair next to him.
Rhaenyra took a deep breath as she watched (Y/N), she brought her hand up and gingerly traced the contours of his abdomen. (Y/N) took her hand in his, bringing it up to his mouth and pressing a kiss to the back of it.
“Turn around.” (Y/N) said, and Rhaenyra complied.
He stepped forward, brushing her hair to her front so that he could see the back of her dress. She shivered as his breath touched the back of her neck. He undid the laces of her dress with careful precision, causing her to laugh and joke.
“Done this before?”
Instead of responding, (Y/N) let the dress fall down her shoulders, leaving her bare. She stiffened as he pressed a kiss to her shoulder, before relaxing as he moved his mouth up her neck. She turned around and (Y/N)’s mouth went dry at the sight of her bare in front of him. She grabbed his neck, leaning up and connecting their lips. She grasped the laces of his trousers, undoing them in haste and shoving them down his legs. (Y/N) stepped out of them, groaning into Rhaenyra’s lip as she grasped him. He could feel her smile against his lips, and he pulled away bringing his mouth to her chest, eliciting a gasp from the princess.
“(Y/N),” She gasped, and he kissed up her chest to her collarbone and back up to her lips, swallowing her next words.
He pulled her close to him, lifting her so that she could wrap her legs around his waist and carried her to the bed. He gently set her down, and she smiled up at him. He returned the smile, before reconnecting their lips. Rhaenyra gasped as (Y/N) pulled away to mouth at her neck, she tangled her fingers in his hair pulling him up from where there would inevitably be a mark on her skin the next morning.
“Stop teasing.”
“Hen rhinka, ñuha ābrazȳrys.”
---
Translations -
Lykirī - be calm
Sōvēs - fly
Valzȳrys - husband
Ābrazȳrys - wife
Hen rhinka, ñuha ābrazȳrys - of course, my wife
#house of the dragon#house of the dragon x male reader#x male reader#daemon targaryen#house of the dragon x y/n#rhaenyra targaryen#rhaenyra targaryen x male reader#rhaenyra targaryen x reader#x reader#x y/n#Going with a mix of show and book canon because I think it makes the most sense#if Laenor and Rhaenyra weren't getting married the whole Joffery and Criston brawl at the wedding wouldn't have happened like in the show#ALSO not trying to make either Daemon for Rhea the bad guy they just have a complex fucked up relationship and I think if they had a kid#The kid would have suffered through their intolerance for each other as well#also i don't really like that scene but it was important and I reworked it like fifty times so I just gave up#Daemon just felt OOC but idk he's a mysterious guy and we only ever see a bit of his sweet side with Nyra and Viserys but even then he's#Mostly silent so what he would say in those moments is up in the air#I'm ranting but yeah
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Been binging the 1986 series again and drew my ver in some of his slays
#love that little banana lookin ass hoe#journey to the west#jttw sun wukong#jttw#sun wukong#journey to the west fanart#digital art#my art#jttw 1986#y’all my senior project got me on LOCKDOWN#I am suffering or2#also I now have what is colloquially known as an ✨inner ear canal infection✨#my ear hurt o(-( can’t have a fucking break in this house#the joys of product design (arguing with manufacturers)#dude the costume design in that show is so gorgeous for everyone#these aren’t even my fave favs but the yellow on swk is so charming#kinda made me cry when in the liu er mihou ep swk is always wearing his fanciest duds when appearing in front of others#but when they went to go see his master he changed back into humble pilgrim clothes#😭 like bro the deference#I really like that frilly pink skirt he had on for a while in s1#like okay fruit slaaay#1986 swk is so fruity he’s the only one who’s outfit changes constantly that’s diva✨
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caterpillar? more like cu. more like cunty. cuntypil. um.
#you're honor he's a bastard and a capitalist but despite his faults i love him very much#so i think he should be Absolved of all crimes and allowed to stay silly w/ it#he's really The Guy of all time...#cant wait to see more of him!!!#man now i gotta go listen to his audios i need to hear his goofy ass voice again <3#scribble salad#welcome home#welcome home puppet show#howdy pillar#blowing him a kiss and then chucking the communist manifesto at his tube head#i could radicalize him...#no actually i dont think Anyone could#he doesnt even get paid. he's out there scamming and lying for shits and gigs#i fear that he's beyond redemption but That's Okay!!!#i support howdy pillar rights AND wrongs <3#i have faith that he'll pay through suffering The Horrors and fuck knows what else <3#i need him to get tossed around like a ragdoll in a rabid dog's mouth#tear the bitch apart! (said so so So affectionately)
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Disney, releasing Wish: "so it's all about legacy--the new generation surpassing the old, overcoming the evils perpetuated by them, relinquishing singular power... and there's an old man in a tower, uh... animal sidekick, i guess..., ah... magic...?
Miyazaki, just out of frame, sledgehammer raised:
#the boy and the heron#not tagging wish 'cause i'm being a little acidic#this isn't to be negative in the slightest--I really respect both films--but it's interesting to see how visceral boy+H gets with its story#what evils have to be rejected and what they represent--and how characters and the world suffer from those evils--as well as how the whole#'rejecting' part goes. in terms of animation powerhouses discussing their legacies - disney and miyazaki both - I find it interesting that#one makes a pretty safe and nostalgic movie about imagination and dreams; the other is a long trudge through the land of the dead.#b+h is a hard watch - and a look at the legacy of a man questioning his whole purpose in the world - after his cultural touchstones#have long passed by. Mahito needs to understand his grief to keep living--but if he drowns in it he'll just continue the cannibalistic and#violent world of his granduncle. how the hell do you make art when the trauma of your entire life has colored it forever? How can anyone?#maybe after a while... it's time to detonate that damn tower and keep living.#this is to say#if you have enough money to make whatever you want#Make It Fucking Count
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Losing Haurchefant was really so sad for your WoL.
Like, you come off the boat (or cart) a fresh-faced adventurer and by the time you've finished Copperbell Mines you've met 2 parties of adventurers just like you who die in those dungeons.
And then when Ifrit tempers an entire group of your allies you have to fine out they are all put to death because they were tempered and somehow you just magically walked out of that unscathed. I even did a sahagain quest today that made you "rescue" some Maelstrom soldiers, who have actually all been tempered so you're tasked with killing them by your own hand.
And all of the rough shit culminates into getting framed for regicide and having all of the people you've given so much for turn against you. And you lose so many friends in the process (you get Y'shtola and Thancred back eventually, but you have no way of knowing that), you're separated from all of your allies and the only surviving ally you have left (that you're aware of) is sinking into a deep depression because he carries the fault for what happened.
And then there's Haurchefant, pressing a mug of hot chocolate into your hands and assuring you everything is going to be alright. Encouraging you to smile even through all the hardship. You're still a hero in his mind. None of your perceived failures or shortcomings have done anything to discourage him from seeing you in the best light. He vouches for you personally, welcomes you into his home, introduces you to his family and gets you back on your feet for more adventuring.
And then he dies. Protecting you. He's always been your shield, from harsh realities and blades alike. But this time it was too much, and he's going to die. But even still, he tells you to smile, because that's what he's always wanted for you, because that's what he's always strived to achieve for you.
That's fucking devastating tbh.
#ffxiv#hw spoilers#tho its been so long lmao#haurchefant greystone#im just reliving the msq and suffering#SE really did bring up haurchefant so often a lot of people started to kinda get tired of it#but in context its actually so tragic#also he just loved you whether you see it as friendship or otherwise#he didnt see you as a pawn to be played in a game he really just idolized you and loved you even at your lowest#a bean really
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Swansea waited till the end to do something about Jimmy and I really think it says something about their shared nihilism.
Jimmy waits till the end to do something and take an ounce of responsibility and he still doesn’t do the the right thing. Swansea reflects and realizes he can’t fix his fuck up but he realizes it. I think it goes ignored that Swansea likely found out he assaulted Anya, when he spoke to her but he still waited. She still knew he wouldn’t protect her and he wasn’t a friend of Jimmy’s. Swansea’s a fatalist and likely assumed there was nothing to be done because they’d all inevitably die. Though he only realized when Anya and Daisuke died that they didn’t have to die in pain.
Jimmy and him shared the view that pain is how you know you’re still alive, but his shifted into understanding that pain should not be the natural state in which the end is the release.
#I dunno Swansea makes me sad cause like he represents when ur past the point of no return#he thinks cause he can’t go back what’s the point of trying to correct anything he feeds into the agony#and assumes it’ll corrupt them all so why make it harder by fighting#I think he really hated Jimmy because Jimmy inflicted suffering to feel alive himself while Swansea just thought it was an inevitable thing#seeing someone try so hard to corrupt things really just made him realize how much he wasn’t like Jimmy but like most things in his life he#waited much too late#jimmy mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game
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Thinking about Minute’s insane morals and how he doesn’t have a single genuinely bad bone in his body. He gets confused when he’s betrayed, he begs for explanations when people are cruel. He would rather make amends than hold onto grudges. He forgives and forgets. He teams with the same guy (Wemmbu) that’s betrayed him countless of times, and still trusts him anyways. Even if a bit reluctant at first. Even if he knows he’ll still end up betrayed.
Like this guy has PROBLEMS. He so morally… Good. He can stoop down to other people’s level, he can play dirty, he can be intimidating. He doesn’t really let himself get walked all over. But he’d MUCH rather just hang out and have peace. He gets upset when people are negative because he’s just SO optimistic. He always has to see the Good side of things, even when it’s a horrendous situation.
Even when he has reasons to be angry and upset and spiteful, he still chooses to hold his head high and STICK to his morals. He’s Stubborn. He tries so hard to see Why people are evil and hurtful, but he can’t personally understand. He needs to be the hero. He needs to save others. Because who else is going to do it? Who else has the resources, the strength, the backbone, the reputation? He gives items out to people with no expectation for reimbursement. He’s always saving other server members, even his enemies, from tricky situations.
He tries hard to remain all mysterious and brooding. He tries to seem calm and collected. But he wears his heart on his sleeve. You can hear every emotion in his voice, in the glint in his eyes. The way his smile upturns when he finds something amusing, or how his eyebrows furrow when he’s trying to piece something together. He’s an incredibly emotional guy, and he’s not good at hiding it. He’s notoriously a bad liar. He gives himself away every time he opens his mouth. It’s WHY he’s so genuine, so easy to trust.
It’s easy to get under his skin, but he still holds his ground. Because he has to. Because the world is cruel and brutal, and everyone is out to get him. Killing is second nature on most SMPs, especially on Lifesteal. But he can defend himself. Most other people can’t. He’s paranoid, and watches events from the sidelines (even if it annoys other players.) He always has extra food and fireworks to give out. Despite covering himself in dark colors, and hiding from large groups, he’s still looking out for others. He’s still the beacon of hope people need. He’s so annoyingly optimistic and cheerful that it’s sickening to most. He refuses to let himself become bitter and pessimistic.
Anyways bro thinks he’s Batman.
#I do NOT want to see a minutetech villain arc I want him to suffer through always playing the Hero#minutetech#PLEASE CAN ANYONE HEAR ME#DOES THIS MAKE SENSE#His hero complex is so fascinating to me#he isn’t doing any of this out of personal gain either#he’s just Genuinely trying to be a good guy#dare I say#In Over My Head by Grandson#I associate that song with him a Lot#he gets overwhelmed with this position he’s put himself into but he can HANDLE it#he HAS to#he has to endure it because nobody else is insane enough to be so stupidly Good and Optimistic#this is inspired mainly by the aftermath of the election results stream#and also the recent Nations event he was in#because wow he really can’t comprehend people Genuinely being evil JUST to be evil#basically Minute has to help people out all of the time or he dies#lifesteal#lifesteal smp
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Broken Roofs and Fixed Perspectives
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#xue yang#xiao xingchen#Lots of cut content notes on this one. Lets all have a moment of silence for all the cut A-Qing's in each perspective.#particularly ripped and buff 'Daozhang Defender 'A-Qing (her perspective)#funny but poor layout#XY also had a red arrow pointed at him in his own POV that said 'just troubled' but it made the panel too cluttered.#He does see himself as troubled and uses that to justify his actions#but I also think there is room for him to not really know exactly how to feel about himself in this situation#Yi-city is such a fantastic tragedy for so many reasons and you will bear witness to me rambling about it in the tags as this arc continues#Helping a blind man fix a roof? A manipulative act of building trust or genuine display of wanting to collaberate?#XY and A-qing have experience of the cruelty of the world where as xxc has blind (haha) faith that kindness prevails#These three simultaneous know each other more than the other's think and *yet* completely miss the mark.#the stories they tell in the blizzard (and the reactions they have) so perfectly display who these characters are#Both xxc and xy tell stories about unfair cruelty. To xxc it is others who's suffering is highlighted. XY highlight's his own.#A-qing understands xue yang more that she wants to admit. She predicts the twists in xy's story and empathizes with the hurt and anger#A-qing is also taking advantage of xxc! She is also lying to survive!#Though shes mostly benign in her intentions. She really did vibe check the rank stank on XY's soul on the spot#Alas...no one listens to teen girls....
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princess concept i've been thinking about is like. let's just go all in on those options that are like "no i'm fine with the world ending." you go down to the basement and tell her that you were sent to kill her because she's going to end the world, and that's why you're going to get her out of there. the princess, momentarily shocked and wanting to protest, quickly readjusts to the idea. the narrator completely flips out and tries to take over as quickly as possible. i'm tentatively calling the chapter 2 of this the harbinger with a chapter 3 being the dawn
#slay the princess#<- sure ill tag this i like the concept perhaps other people will also like it#soft/harsh versions of this maybe#it'd be a bit of a knife neutral route#though i initially envisioned this w soft princess mostly just bc i got the idea while trying to play thru damsel as a world ending maniac#not really like the tower. i imagine she'd be kind of skittish about it. a more reluctant acceptance of her role#cabin dark and crawling and full of candles#you see her in shadows. perhaps heavily veiled. LOTS of chains holding her captive#i might write something for this i dunno#VOICE OF THE HERO PROBABLY SUFFERING BADLY THIS ROUTE ALSO. HES VERY NORMAL#as loyal as he is i can't imagine he really like. would be on board for the 'let's bring about the apocalypse!' thing#narrator also suffering badly . everyone suffering badly really#my posts
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I personally subscribe to the idea that Adventurer Zenos shows his affection and appreciation for his peers in very odd ways (like yoinking the Students' taxes and dealing with their expenses and maybe also paying for some of their expenses but shhh).
#ffxiv#sketch#fan art#zenos yae galvus#g'raha tia#krile mayer baldesion#adventurer zenos#I like the thought that krile and zenos go from mutual ignoring/dislike to krile and tataru having to hunt zenos down#because after he starts caring about the students and scions he would purposely keep away from krile knowing that she could#potentially hear how he's feeling- and I write Adven!Zenos as starting to do better but I dont imagine his idle thoughts are there yet#I imagine the groups going from “we put up with him because we're trying to keep him from making the same mistakes again” to#“wow he's actually surprisingly chill and helpful” (other than- well- the obvious)#local former prince putting in the effort + and being given a proper chance? he gets to thrive a bit. as a treat#maybe ill also work a bit on the concept that he still really doesnt know what fully drives him and makes him happy#but he at least starts getting a bit of enjoyment out of seeing the people he cares for happy#(so much so he'll make himself suffer through stacks of paperwork)
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