#he owes that little goat HIS LIFE )

[blitzbuckz]

" I don't think you know what it is your asking for. " imp lute to blitz

【𐂃】 ❝ bitch, I've been runnin' this operation longer than yer lassie eyelashes. I know it's a bit excessive -- but unless y' can prove yer worth I'll have ta decline. ❞ Kicking his legs forward he crossed them on top of his desk before leaning back against his chair. Propping the side of his cheek with his left palm, looking unimpressed as he continued the interview.

❝ Look, I'm not sayin' it ta be mean. This is a murder business 'n I just don't have ta time t' look after anyone who isn't cut out to draw blood. If that's what makin' ya question my requirements. ❞

[hollisxwrites]

Hiii!!! I was wondering if you could do a Percy x Reader, where it’s a friends to lovers kind of thing, they have kind of a childish relationship, and they confess their feelings towards each other when Percy gets a bit jealous of the reader and Grover being close? If not that’s 100% okay! And either way I hope you have a good day or night xx🤍

our goat man friend did the underwater jig

percy jackson x fem reader

word count: 1.6k maybe?

authors note: GUYS. i love you all. thank you for supporting me and my work, I have 3k notes now, and 70 followers. i owe this all to you, and i am so proud of the work that i have done so far. i think this is the most unserious fic i have written; i wrote this at one am, but i think it's cute and fluffy and silly. i hope you guys enjoy my dancing goat man that i love so much! also, so sorry if this is not exactly what you were looking for, anon, i just kind of took a silly idea and ran with it lol.

warnings: jealous percy!, curse words, a fish, this is so silly.

Percy Jackson was my best friend in the entire world, but he was also someone that I love more than my life itself. Ever since we met one faithful day in June, my first day of so-called summer camp, we became inseparable. The son of Poseidon was beautiful, to say the least, and he was endearing. Everyone in Camp loved him, which made everyone in Camp love me, as we were pretty much joined at the hip. Starting when we were thirteen, we would spend the night in his cabin together since we were both plagued by vivid nightmares that left us both restless. It started off as just sharing his cabin, but then it came to sharing a bed, and eventually, us holding each other for maximum nightmare prevention. We also trained together, more and more often the older we got, and we even broke the rules and ate every meal with each other. The young campers, once we turned seventeen and were seen as the ‘cool, older campers’ thought we were dating, and one of them went as far to say that we were married. I could see where someone young would assume that, but none of the older campers said anything…to our faces. I heard the rumors, but I chose to ignore them, Percy and I were just friends. We teased each other, of course, and made sex jokes to each other all of the time, but we were just friends, sadly.

I was in love with the Percy Jackson. He was everything I could ever want, but I blocked out my feeling in order to salvage our friendship that I held so dear. That didn’t stop me, however, from thinking about kissing him every time we laid in his bed together, every time his hand brushed against mine, and every time we spared, and he pinned me to the ground. We spent every single day together, and so, of course, his friends became my friends, and that includes his best friend, Grover.

Though Percy was always going to be my best friend, my home, I was quite the sociable person, and so I enjoyed spending time with everyone. Grover was hilarious, in a quiet way, and he kept me on my toes and my wit in tip top shape. I slowly began to start spending almost as much time with Grover as I did Percy, and nine times out of ten, Percy would tag along, making us a happy little trio that most definitely got along. This specific day, we were spending time at Percy’s favorite place on the Campgrounds, the lake.

I was chasing after Grover and Percy who had taken off spiriting through the woods after they heard some rustling in the trees that they thought was a monster, or even worse, Clarisse, but it just ended up being a cute little bunny. “Guys!” I panted out. “Wait up, please!”

Percy looked behind himself and at me. He gave me one of his award-winning smirks and said, “just run faster, bitch!”

Grover snorted rather unattractively at that, but the joke didn’t stop him from slowing his pace to let me catch up to him. “Don’t want you to get lost.” Grover winked, making me laugh at his comedic gesture.

“Stop flirting and hurry up, don’t want anyone to have the same idea as us!” Percy, from about thirty feet away, yelled, a sour tone in his voice.

“Ew, we are not flirting, Perc!” I yelled back, in an equally disgusted tone.

Grover rolled his eyes at both of us and lowered his voice just to address me. “When are you going to tell him, girl?” He massaged his temples. “He is goo-goo eyed for you.”

It was my turn to roll my eyes. “Never. I love him, but he doesn’t love me like that.”

Grover nearly groaned in annoyance. “{Reader}, I’m saying this because I am your friend, but you are acting like a dumbass. I have told you he loves you, and you love him, and why don’t you just act on it?”

Grover had been my wingman this entire time, encouraging me to grow some balls and ask the man of my dreams out. It all started this one time where, on a dare, someone asked Percy to kiss me, and he obliged without any protest. Putting two and two together, Grover decided that I liked Percy, and he liked me, and so we needed to date. That was three years ago. Nothing anywhere close to that, except this one time he kissed me on the cheek because…that’s beside the point.

“I will, Grover. I just don’t want to…”

My thought was cut off by us approaching the clearing where the man of the hour, the beautiful, Perseus Jackson stood, his arms crossed, and cheeks flushed from overexertion. “Took you guys soon enough! Let’s swim!”

Percy tossed his orange t-shirt aside and it took everything in my power not to stare. He was just too stunning. I followed suit, pulling off my athletic shorts and matching orange Camp shirt to reveal a deep blue swimsuit that I think showed off figure that I had acquired from training.

I dove in the water after Percy, and he scooped me into his freckled arms. “I like the swimsuit.” He said with a sheepish smile on his face.

“Thank you, Perc.” I said, my face flushed, but I pretended it was from the bright sun that was baking us.

Our moment was interrupted by Grover cannonballing right into the middle of our little bubble of unconfessed feelings, sending a tidal wave of water over Percy and I.

I wiped the water from my eyes when all of the sudden, Percy pushed me under the water. In the moment, I started to panic, a little bit, because I couldn’t breathe, but all of the sudden, I could. Percy was protecting me. My initial thought was, poor Grover, we’re abandoning him, but then my second thought was, holy shit, I’m underwater alone, in a bubble, with Percy fucking Jackson.

Percy smiled at me and hurried me along when we were finally able to touch the floor of the lake. I could see Grovers little goat feet treading water from above us, and it made both me and Percy giggle a little bit. Percy finally stopped pushing me along in his little bubble when we reached a beautiful cove of water lilies. I smiled at the boy in front of me, and he smiled back, a little awkwardly.

“Soooo…{Reader}.” He said, rubbing the back of his neck. I giggled awkwardly. “Percy.”

“I see you and Grover have gotten…closer.” His eyes were unreadable, and I had no idea where this was going.

“He’s a twenty-something year old goat man who I see as more of a father figure than anything else, Percy. I am a seventeen-year-old demigod who has no father figure in her life. We may have gotten closer, but it’s nothing like that.” I said, a matter-of-fact tone in my voice.

Percy looked embarrassed at this, probably thinking about how he didn’t really think his accusation through. “That’s very true.” His eyes avoided meeting mine, and he seemed suddenly very interested in a fish swimming by me.

“Why do you care?” I asked, genuinely wondering. Percy shrugged at this, not confessing his real reason for dragging to the bottom of a dam lake. “Look at me, Perc, why do you care?”

His eyes finally met mine. “Because you’re mine, and I don’t want someone else to look at you the way I want to.”

I was…flabbergasted…to say the least. I was not expecting that. “Of course, I am yours, but to what extent? We can’t keep dancing around each other, waiting for someone to finally break the tension surrounding us.”

At this, Percy pulled us closer together, our faces inches apart. “This tension?”

My breath faltered. “This exactly.”

Percy let us linger on the feeling of closeness without pressing our lips together. Our eyes met, and our noses nearly touched, but neither of us took the next step. I could feel him breathing, and I was sure he could feel me, and the electric energy of love sparking between that I was sure the fishes around us could feel it. “Kiss me, asshole.” I mumbled against his lips, and his next movement made my head spin.

The kiss was…magical. I was unable to think of anything, not even how to breathe. Percy’s lips were everywhere and nowhere all at once, and my hands found his hair almost by instinct. Before things could get a little too far, both of us looked up and almost had a heart attack. Grover was right above us doing a little jig in the water, holding his nose, trying not to inhale water.

“What the fuck, Grover!” Percy exclaimed, laughing hysterically, his hands still around my waist. Grover floated back up to the surface, probably going back up for air, and Percy and I smiled at each other, laughter seizing our bodies.

We paddled back up to the surface. “Grover, I will slaughter you.” I said, the huge smile on my face telling him that my threat was empty.

“I win a bet! I win a bet!” Grover sang, doing his little jig on the beach now. “I am so glad I do not have to listen to you guys pine over each other anymore!”

I gasped and looked at Percy who froze beside me. “You pined over me?”

“That’s a story for another day.” Percy said, stifling back a laugh.

The rest of the day was bliss, my new boyfriend and annoying, jigging goat friend by my side, making that day a day that I would always remember.

[suzukiblu]

Day seven of fic NaNoWriMo, obligatory sugar daddy Tim/sugar baby Kon AU.

Kon zips up to Tim, puts the little clay goat in his hands with a quick "hold this," because he is clearly not aware of how the oils on people's hands can damage this kind of thing or concerned about how magic or cursed it may or may not be, and deals with the panicked thieves. Tim shakes the sleeves of his jacket down over his hands to hold the goat more carefully and watches attentively as Kon tosses them all into a pile and then ties them up with a combination of TTK and velvet divider ropes. Tim would not typically use velvet divider ropes as restraints, but imagines that choice probably works better with telekinetic reinforcement behind it.

Actually, it definitely does, because Kon just whapped Lisa upside the back of the head with a loose end of the heavy velvet divider rope when she started trying to squirm free. 

"Ow!" she yells indignantly. 

"How's that whole 'the idol will protect us!' thing going for you now?" Kon asks curiously. 

"You don't know the shape of its blessing!" Mark snarls, attempting to kick him. The effort is futile and pathetic and also pretty stupid, since if he actually managed to hit Kon he'd probably just break his foot on him, but whatever, not Tim's problem. 

"The shape of its blessing is a cute goat and a jail cell," Kon says. 

"We should probably find a staff member to take this, on that note," Tim says, glancing around for one. There's got to be somebody. The guards are an option, he guesses, once Kon gets around to untying them. But he definitely should not still be holding this goat, even with his sleeves tucked over his hands and him being as careful as he reasonably can about it. 

Seriously. Somewhere a museum curator is crying and doesn't even know why. 

"Oh, sure," Kon says. The guards' restraints all simultaneously fall off. Unfortunately, none of them happen to be wearing gloves or have sleeves as long as Tim's, so that's going to be an issue. 

"Thanks," Tim says anyway.

"Eh, it was nothing," Kon replies with a shrug. "Literally, this whole situation was nothing. Like, this situation was the opposite of a situation. Nothing even happened." 

And then Tim just . . . has an idea, almost. Or at least the nucleus of one. 

"You did save my life, actually," he points out, making his tone politely appreciative but also carefully casual. 

"No offense, but I save a lot of people's lives, that doesn't really stick out in my day-to-day activities," Kon says. 

"I don't know, it stuck out a bit for me," Tim says, and Kon laughs. 

"Okay, fair," he says, flashing him a grin. "You're not actually hurt or anything, right? Eardrum didn't rupture when the gun went off?" 

"Doubt it," Tim says. Frankly he's unspeakably lucky that it didn't, but Kon's TTK probably did block at least some of the sound. 

He really didn't know Kon could use it like this, to be honest. Kon cracks out his TTK every chance he gets and brags the whole time he does, obviously, but Tim's never seen him manipulate it quite this way. 

It occurs to him to wonder if that means it's a new trick, or if Kon just always wraps up hostages or threatened civilians in his aura like that and just never mentions it. It seems likelier it'd be a new trick, considering literally everything he knows about Kon and his desperate and unsubtle need for validation and attention, but Kon was so unshakeably confident in the move–and not in a brash or blustering way, but in an obvious, matter-of-fact certainty. Like he'd done it a thousand times and it hadn't failed him yet. 

Tim should definitely figure out a way to follow up on that later. 

"Cool," Kon says, then looks around the gallery again. Tim feels oddly bereft without his immediate focus. 

Stupid, stupid inadvisable crush. Ugh. Bats don't want to be the center of anyone's attention unless they're deliberately drawing fire away from someone else. Tim definitely doesn't want to be the center of anyone's attention. 

Except, apparently, for Kon's. 

This incident report is going to be nothing but lies. Filthy, shameless lies.

[frostedclock-writes]

Alastor x ♀️! Reader

Path to Damnation

---

Part 1 (Prologue)

Warning: Rated 18+ (just as a general rule of thumb)

---

You are the new resident of the hotel, but you aren't there to redeem yourself. No you are repaying a debt owed and it might cost you more then you bargained for. What should you report to Vox on this?

It was always a bit stuffy inside the conference room, the aquarium walls with circling sharks kept you on edge. Though you kept your composure as Mr. Vox ran his electric blue claw like didget around the rim of his glass.

" Simple enough instructions? Our last effort didn't even last the night. " Vox made a scoff of a laugh. " But with this new fancy hotel, " he put on a large smile and made a mocking excited gestured, then rolled his eyes and looked down at his glass, " it should be easy, you will give me a report every week on the hotel and what that fucker is up to with this damn scheme. "

" I think I can handle it, Mr. Vox. " You give a grin and put a hand on your hip. " It's perfect, they are hiring for a second maid thanks to all of their fancy new rooms and I know how to clean up a mess. "

The grin stretched across Vox's screen. " Then don't fail us. " He swirled his glass before taking a drink. " And we can call ourselves even. "

You nod and excuse yourself from the conference room as quickly as possible. You did have this. You haven't been in hell long, but you watched the news three months ago during the last extermination. You saw the faces of those who you will be calling coworker for now. You checked your phone as you got into the elevator. 1:15 p.m. You were expected to arrive and meet the head of staffing at the Hazbin Hotel, the woman named Vaggie. Room and board is included as pay for now, not that you didn't have a flow of funds right now from your current employers. Report and watch. Remember that. A job. Nothing more.

The ding of the elevator brought you back into reality and you stepped out into the bottom floor of the Vee Tower. The crisp smell of electronic and perfumed workers left your nose and was replaced with sulfur and shit. It was something you had gotten used to, among other things that might have once made you cringe or look away in life now just seemed normal. The walk through town was a dangerous one at the best of times, but you knew how to handle yourself. If you didn't, you would have been double dead by this point. You slip your way through the distracted crowds of sinners gathered around the store front of the Vee tower.

Your heels clicked against the concrete of the sidewalk as you made your way through Pentagram City, you looked at your phone again at the directions to the hotel. The Hazbin Hotel. It had been the butt of everyone's joke just nine months prior, but after that little maid had killed the leader of the exterminaton angels it changed. Which has really put a craw in your employers ass. The Vees had hoped the Radio Demon - who was helping with this 'princess passion project ' as they had put it - had disappeared again after that battle but much to Vox's dismay, it seems like he's a lot harder to kill.

You stop as you reach large wrought iron gates and a winding cobblestone pathway to a massive hotel, a large golden statue was in front of the entrance. Is that a dragon goat? You know what, it's hell, why should anything surprise you at this point. You gaze up at it as you pass beneath it on your way to the French double doors, it was massive and the whine of the gold made it seem like someone polished it everyday.

" Quite a work of art, don't you agree?" The crackle of static was the only warning you had before the filtered voice hit your ears from behind you.

You spun on your heels and you were looking into the intense red gaze of the deer demon known as Alastor. He seemed to chuckle at your response and stood up straight from the slightly leaned posture he had. " Oh, yes. Hi. Hello. " You clear your throat and keep your gaze on his smiling mug. Remember why you are here. " I'm here to find a Vaggie ? I am the new hire."

Alastor looked over you for a moment, his eyes drifted from your shoes up to your face and he made a hum sound. " Ah, so she was serious in requiring more help. She only needed to ask and I could have provided. But a fresh face to the hotel will do just nicely. " He extended his hand, " Alastor, quite a pleasure to meet you. Though I am sure you have heard of me no doubt."

You make a laugh and you take his hand, he shook it a little hard and you felt your body wiggle in the force of his shake. " Of course, Well, at least what you used to do was rather famous in the circles I ran in. Though you havent done much in the past eight years. "

His eyebrow twitched, he made a laugh. Loud, a bit forced. " Ha ha, well yes, I had taken a well needed vacation and now my time is taken up by this little project I am helping with."

The sound of a door opening, and a stern female voice called over. " Alastor, Niffty got caught in the chandelier again, could you- oh. " The white haired woman walked over, she had her hair pulled back in a ponytail that was held with a red ribbon and her bangs covered one eye. " You must be who I talked with on the phone. " Then she shot a glare at the Radio Demon. " Are you fucking scaring off our new help?"

Alastor put his hands behind his back. " Nothing of the sort! I was merely introducing myself, as a hotel manager should, hm? Now it seems I am needed elsewhere, " he looked over his shoulder as he began to walk away. His gaze on you for a moment, your stomach felt like it was in a vice with the way his red eyes met yours. " Looking forward to working with you. "

Then he was gone.

You blink and see Vaggie's fingers snapping in front of you. " Oh, sorry, did you say something, ma'am?" You day as you look over at her.

Her stern face softened a bit and she put her hand on her hip. " Come, let me show you the room you will be staying in and we can introduce you to everyone else. Don't worry, they aren't all like... Him." Her nose crinkled as she glanced in the direction that Alastor had left.

" Oh, alright. How many people are staying here anyways?" You ask as you fall in line behind her as Vaggie went inside.

Vaggie made a hum, her hands went behind her back like she was in a slight march. " Currently? We only have one guest, Angel Dust. Our staff includes myself, Husk the concierge and bartender, Niffty is our other resident maid, and you just met Alastor. We often have Charlie's father here as well as 'hotel manager consultant ' as he calls himself. And of course Charlie herself, she's particularly excited to meet you. "

She seemed to speak in a fond tone towards the end, you chuckle and smile. " Well if she is running the place, it's only right I meet her as well."

" She's busy right now prepping your welcoming party. She's going a little crazy in the new banquet hall. " Vaggie made a breath of a laugh. " So I hope you are hungry.

The hallways were carpeted in a elegant red with gold along the edges, the walls were a cream with gold molding along the top and bottom, it was almost a bit intimidating to be walking through in your dirty shoes. Thankfully you had dressed nicely at least in a simple button up blouse and an ankle length skirt, professional was what you had been going for and from what you could remember this outfit fit the bill.

She lead you up to the room you will be staying in for the foreseeable future. It was large, with the carpet being a plain dark red with a queen size bed with plain sheets and a dresser in the corner next to a dark wooden door. You assumed it must lead to a bathroom.

" It's bare, but you are welcome to decorate how you want. Charlie wants everyone to be able to ' express themselves' in healthy ways. " Vaggie explained as you made your way to the bed and felt the soft sheets.

It didn't smell foul in here you noticed. Everything had a sweet scent like apple blossoms and nature, you had almost forgotten what it had smelled like. It was comforting almost, but at the same time you had gotten so used to the copper and sulphur smell that seeped through Hell.

" That's fine. " You made a small chuckle, you clap your hands together as you spin around. " So... A party?"

[jinkiezzsstuff]

Omg the x transmigrated reader was AWESOME.

I absolutely love it , thank you so much for doing it!

I didn't mind the wait really, you have your own life and thing's to do ! (⁠~⁠‾⁠▿⁠‾⁠)⁠~

Would you mind doing a part 2? Meeting Lucifer and the angels maybe. (Adam,lute etc.. when charlie went to heaven.)

Do I need to describe the reader?? You can leave it blank as " h/c " "e/c" ( h/c meaning hair color and e/c meaning eye color. )

Have a good day and don't stress yourself 〜⁠(⁠꒪⁠꒳⁠꒪⁠)⁠〜

Hiya! I’m so glad you enjoyed it! I can absolutely do a part two!! I feel I owe it to you since the last one is so short but i’m really glad it’s whatcha wanted :) hopefully i also do this one justice

Characters present: Charlie; Vaggie; Nifty; Alastor; Husk; Lucifer; Adam; Lute; Sera; Emily (With the focus being on mainly Charlie; Vaggie; Lucifer; Lute; Adam; Sera and emily)

Part 1

Summary: You’ve spent about a week in hell and easily fell into place and routine. It was like a cheat code for life knowing everything that came next, and you made it your mission to meet the angels with Charlie

Warnings: Male Reader, Male pronouns, reader is a goat, implied to be tall, POSSIBLY OOC angels, reader kinda flirted with lute? i couldn’t help it love her teehee, loosely follows plotline but could be holes, cussing, possibly rushed because dude i was literally obsessed with the idea i needed to get it out, let me know if i missed anything! oh and not proofread so sorry luvs xx

Transported

“Couldn’t you just use you magic to bring these in Al?” You grunted setting the last box of supplies down. Alastor hummed flatly, shrugging his shoulders. “It’s more entertaining watching you lug those boxes up all those stairs!”

You gave him cut eye as he laughs, snapping his fingers disappearing to, god only knows where. Taking out a pad and pen from your back pocket, you wrote down all the stock you bought from the store- per Charlie’s request. As you did so your ear twitched picking up the faint sound of tiny pit pats from a certain cherry haired cyclops running around manically.

It wasn’t long before she came barrelling into the kitchen, you however were too occupied to mind her; staying bent over the kitchen counter writing all that you had bought. Nifty without asking, scaled your body, gripping your (h/c) hair and deeply inhaling. Looking up from the paper your hand ceased its writing in shock and confusion.

“Nif, what in the great fuck are you doin?” You asked in disbelief, she only cackled muttering to herself about bad boys and bad… bugs? “Hey can you do me a favour stabby?” You ask grabbing her gently off the nape of your neck and plopping her down below.

She stood at attention, hand in salute before shouting; “Sir yes sir!” You clapped your hands together huffing out a laugh. “Alright, good energy, would you mind helping me out by putting these things away. It’s all food for our patrons and stuff, i gotta go find Charlie and tell her what we couldn’t and could get.”

Nifty once again saluted before zipping around you in a blur. Cautiously you walked off trying to avoid the little speed demon as she zoomed around the kitchen. Once in the lobby you noticed, well a lot, the whole room was decorated, and there hung a banner with ‘welcum home daddy’, which you knew what that meant.

A little pep put in your step you trotted up to Husk at the bar. “Want a drink?” He immediately asked, looking over at you as soon as you got within reaching distance of the bar. You shook your head. “Nah, I wanted to ask if you know where Charlie was? It’s about stock, and i’ve got left over cash,”

Humming the cat shook his head eyebrows raised high. “Good luck with that one kid, she’s up there tryna convince the king to get her into heaven. You could try though, lord knows you will anyway.”

Although his voice was bored and tired, face looking as though he’d just been through hell. Thankfully he grinned at you calming the insecure thoughts that unwelcomingly entered your mind about him being annoyed at your appearance. Perhaps if it was your old life you wouldn’t have cared, but these characters, sinners, people, they were cherishable to you in a indescribable way, and you didn’t want them disliking you.

And that could be arguably unhealthy, but you saw a demon with the head of a chair carrying around their partner -you think?, it’s safe to assume you don’t have to worry about mental wellness and emotional instability or healthy decision making; it’s hell duh.

After waving goodbye to Husk you trotted up the stairs, hooves pounding against the wood a noise you’d recently gotten used to. As you stepped down the hall you wondered if Alastor had already threatened Husk, it would make sense as to why he disappeared while you unboxed, and why Husk seemed so down and out.

You tried to ignore how upset that made you, but realistically you weren’t any match for Al, you may be knowledgeable about the future, but that made you far from immortal or combat savvy. You had to be a little more calculated with situations like that.

Recognizing the voices of Vaggie, Charlie and Lucifer in the distance, you excitedly sped up. Eyes locked on the balcony door, you breathed deeply not wanting to look like a babbling fan boy over the king of hell.

Standing up straight you opened the balcony door, effectively stopping Lucifers railing rant as he hung himself over the edge. “Oh my gosh! This is him, dad! The guy i told you about, dad this is YN, YN, my dad: Lucifer!” Charlie exclaimed happily pushing the king of hell toward you.

His face was turned up in disgust, but you were too enthralled to care, instead you gave him an easy smile sticking out your hand. “It’s so nice to meet you Lucifer, and I apologize Charlie for barging in and interrupting; I came to tell you about to produce I bought.”

Lucifer took your hand shaking it firmly, slowly a smiled appeared. “Ah well, well, uh, you… i mean look at you! You’re huge huh, uh i’ve never seen a goat in hell! Aha, y’know, aside from… me.” Lucifer trailed, pitch raising and dropping rapidly as he observed your looming presence.

Charlie discreetly nudged her father for being so blunt, but you shrugged it off deciding to sway the conversation slightly. “So I just got back from the store, I got everything we needed for the hotel, food wise, aside from toilet paper, Niftys putting everything away. The only thing i didn’t restock was liquor, let’s let Alastor handle that one.”

Vaggie humphed, giving a rare approving smile and nod, involving herself in the conversation after being casted aside to herself. “It’s nice having someone actually spend the money on stuff we ask for.” Charlie tsked at her before focusing back on you and her dad.

“What do you think of this hotel?” Lucifer asked skeptically circling you. Charlie shook her head at her fathers antics but said nothing. “I think it’s possible, why shouldn’t it be.” You say, giving Charlie a sharped tooth smile. Lucifer put his finger and thumb under his chin, he hummed at you, look back at Charlie but he seemed to be elsewhere.

“I think we need a good word in, and some good marketing. No one likes a commercial or ad, y’know.” You add trying to sway Lucifers contemplative thinking into believing in her. After all you don’t think you could do another musical number.

Sighing and lurching forward, Lucifer smiled back at you then to Charlie.

_____

You waited in the lobby checking your watch occasionally, impatiently waiting for Charlie and Vaggie to meet you. You spent a good deal of time talking to Charlie and Vaggie about the things they could say to the angels that you ended up being invited along for the trip. Charlie’s reasonings were that you were a good example of a goodness in hell, which you could agree with but part of that was because you may have not belong.

Needless to say that admittedly was not how you saw yourself weaselling your way into the venture, but eh, didn’t matter to you. You had one of your freshest suits on, compliments of Alastor, your hair styled perfectly after much fighting for the proper look you were seeing angels after all, cologne freshly spritzed and wafting off your body; you felt excited and your readiness reflected that.

Lucifer entered the lobby with a poof, being the one to conjure the portal to heaven. Smiling at him, he returned it and strolled his way to you, swinging his cane. Slamming it down he leaned forward supporting himself with the apple handled of said cane.

Sniffing the air almost comically he hummed approvingly. “That smells, so fucking good!” The exclaimation went straight to your ego immediately feeling better about your decisions with frangrance choice. “Thank you, it’s one similar to my favourites when i was alive.”

Lucifer nodded looking up at you, you could see vulnerability in his eyes briefly before his eyes darted away. “Can you do me a solid? Please,” Lucifer asked quietly stretching upward toward you. Hands in your pants pockets you leaned over just slightly as to not disrespect him and his height, but to get a little closer to him. “Protect Charlie, and Maggie-“

“Vaggie.” You correct quietly. The king shook his head hand coming upward. “Yeah her- anyways, please while your there use your frightening, uh, form, to keep her safe please. I can’t go up there and I’m loosing my mind with worry!”

Lucifer grabbed the rim of his hat pulling it over his face as he stressed no doubt catastrophizing things slightly. “Don’t worry Luce, from goat man to goat man, i got you. Charlie is pretty bright and i do believe she’s got this in the bag. I’m glad you could give her this opportunity as well, i know it’s hard. Good job.” You praised clapping Lucifer on the back, he looked up at you a fog seemingly cleared from his mind.

He thanked you with a new look in his eyes, appreciation for your words was definitely evident in them as well. Without further ado, Charlie came skipping down the stairs, Vaggie way less excited than her girlfriend but that’s understandable. Things always got worse before they got better and it’s not different for Vaggies fallen angel situation.

After a few short hours of travel, another musical introduction, you’d finally got to the place you would be staying. You lingered in the hall, waiting for Charlie to skip on out, maybe you could lessen the brunt for Vaggie. For you it was a show playing out, but for her, momentarily her world will feel crushed and confused and you didn’t want someone you could relate with going through such a thing.

Watching as the door swung open, you backed off into the shadows hoping you wouldn’t notice you, and once she was out of sight you knocked on their door. Opening the door, Vaggie stood there meek and shy looking, and gazing behind her you knew why.

There stood Lute and Adam tall and sharp. “Ouu a throuple interesting.” Adam says slyly smiling, Vaggie visibly cringed at that. “Who the fuck is this guy now!” Lute exclaimed grabbing at Vaggie.

Adam scoffed at Lute muttering at her to chill the fuck out, and thankfully she did stepping off from her attack position. “I came to see how Vaggies doing, who’re you?” You asked faux confusion feeling bubbles of excitement in your stomach, mischief brewing in your mind. “Uh duh, Adam the first fucking man, shit what’s with you losers.”

Adam was clearly pissed off, at your invasion but you didn’t intend to back off, instead you walked in beside Vaggie. You don’t remember them just appearing in the room when you were watching the show, but perhaps your mind is confused a bit.

It’s been awhile since you got here. “I, you filthy demon, am Lute,” You interrupted her finger pointed her way. “As in short for lieutenant?” Adam snickered and Vaggie pulled at you. “Please leave they, we, have to have a talk.” Looking towards Adam, Lute and then Vaggie, you decided the best thing to do was let it all play out.

With a prompt nod you turned to the door. “I’ll wait outside then.” Adam pushed Vaggie away from the door, he grabbed it and pointed a finger at you. “I won’t lie dude, you look fucking sick, hard shit, but next time you look at me fucking sideways, i will rock your shit. I am the literal MAN.” Slamming the door in your face you were greeted with silence.

Well for a moment. You could begin to hear Adam compliment your form toward Lute, saying they needed “horns like that” because they were “way more wicked”. It did strike your ego ever so slightly, in a way you suppose you and Adam could get along. You did enjoy guitar, and you wouldn’t mind knocking him down a peg for a little enjoyment. Plus, he lost his first loves literally made solely for him, you could sympathize with that heartbreak and how it changes you.

You weren’t shocked to hear the point of the conversation turn manipulative, as Adam threatened to tell Charlie that Vaggie was a fallen. You knew all their backstories though, you knew how this would go, so it almost felt fake pretending. It’s not that you didn’t feel for the emotions they felt because you truly did, you just new how momentarily it would be in the grand schemes of things.

The only problem seemed to be, when the show ends, do you end too? Would you then suddenly thrusted out of this world, become a part of it? You weren’t sure you wanted to think about that.

Hearing the door open, your head slowly and lazily swayed toward the sound watching Adam exit the room with Lute, only to have the door slammed on their heels. “Pft, on the rag.” Adam muttered hands on his hips, then his eyes travelled towards you. “The fuck are you doing, spying around?” Lute accused eyes hard as they lassered into your soul.

Your mouth shrugged and you shook your head no. Lute however didn’t let up stepped up to you making you cast your eyes down to her. You smiled mischievously at her, it was so cool seeing her yellow eyes stare into your (e/c) ones for real, not just some 2D colours on LEDs.

“I can smell the filth from a mile away. Whatever you and that antichrist have planned i will not stop until i sniff it out.” Lute gritted out angrily, Adam sticking up the bird in the background. Scoffing you shook your head. “Whatever pretty thing, i mean no harm,” You put your hands up defensively before continuing. “I only come for business. Trust, I and especially Charlie mean no harm. Heh, and i think you know Vaggies innocent.”

Lutes mouth hung open as Adam ‘aha’d pointing a finger out you. “You fucking freak! You were spying. Pound it.” Adam at first screamed than calmed down a coy smile present on his face. Lute groaned frustratingly at Adam. “We will fucking end you filthy sinners. We need to go!” Lute called as she walked away, Adam shrugged a cup materializing from nowhere for him to suck down.

Grinning you called out to Lute as she walked away. “Love you too sugar! See you in court.” You twiddled your fingers in their direction the two of them glanced back at your voice. Adam kept yapping to Lute but she was too busy sulking to herself.

You expected to be actually hit by one of them by now, maybe it was because you were in heaven that they couldn’t, or maybe Lucifer was right, you just looked frightening. Although you didn’t see what he saw, in your opinion you just looked slightly different.

Who knows though. Your whole worlds flipped upside down.

Walking aimlessly around the holy fortress you eyed everything around you and worried not about angels; most of them ran or avoided you. After all you were maybe the scariest outside of Adam with his mask.

Your eyes locked on an angel with dark skin and lavender hair. “Emily.” You accidentally say aloud, you grimaced watching her turn to you, and look up in awe. “Woah! You must be Charlie’s friend!” She exclaimed happily fluttering over to you. “Uh, yeah, YN, nice to meet you Emily. Sorry I went straight to the rooms i promised to unload things for Vaggie and Charlie so they wouldn’t stress themselves. I didn’t mean to ignore.” You say watching as he nodded along fully attentive.

“Oh that’s fine! I was so excited and distracted by Charlie and everything I barely noticed i’m sorry,” She trailed finger to her lip, she now realized that didn’t sound as good aloud as it did in her head. You brushed it off telling her it was fine. “I hope i don’t scare you, i’m used to myself but all these angels seem a little… disturbed.” You explained.

You weren’t gonna lie the looks you’ve been getting are what fueled the rush to get things over with, so you could get back to more welcoming eyes, well welcoming as they can be. It felt awful to be the centre of attention that was negative especially since you already really didn’t belong to this world.

“Oh no! You’re totally fine! I mean you are intimidating but if what Charlie said is true you’re a great man- uh, goat?” You laughed a genuine boastful laugh at her comment. “Yeah, goat man is good. Thank you Em, i appreciate it.” Her wings fluttered hands clapping rapidly. “I love when my nickname gets used!”

“Emily,” A warm voice spoke, approaching the space you took up in the communal space you were in. “We have to prepare, court is going to be in session soon.” Sera said placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. You met Sera’s eyes and immediately she looked as if she was pushed slightly, the hand not resting on Emily’s shoulder rushed up to her head.

Coming to herself she harshly questioned you. “What, and who are you?” A little taken aback by such a intro, you stuttered and stalled for the first time since being here. Most things flowed naturally but now it seemed something was, wrong.

“Sera! This is Charlie’s friend, the one accompanying them, the good one.” Emily whispered the last part to Sera who didn’t let up her seering gaze. “You don’t look like you belong here.”

Your blood ran cold at that sentence, what Emily assumed was a simple statement of your appearance to you was more of an acknowledgment. One that was specifically for you to understand that she knew. There was no mistaking it in her eyes either, it was like she was telepathically telling you that the gig was up.

Clearing your throat you nod once in finality. “Well, uh, let’s get to court hm?”

[writing-frenzy]

Isekai with the Kurosaki fam; now with some UraIchi spice

So, my brain has been dumping even more ideas for a fandom I can't write for, so I guess I'll dump all the ideas on the ground and sees what happens; also, partly inspired because of DevinePhoenix's Glass Body, Steal Wings and slightly be Cannon Ichigo in AU series by Williamcipher, especially the third of the series, because ye.

Anyways, so for me, I can never imagine Ichigo would part from his sisters and Goat-face easily, even in a normal au, because it's Ichigo's family, his friends, his lost, his life experiences that makes him who he is as a person; if he died and then transferred, a part of me wonders if he would ever try and get back home somehow. So my brain went-

Brain: hey, how about we have a thing that makes the entire family get into an accident :D

Brain: And, like, maybe a day before or when Ichigo was younger, he ended up saving a godly being's most beloved person, so the god is like; hey, I owe you, I'll reincarnate your family into my world; thing is, the world the god has is maybe connected in a way to an anime/webnovel/comic one of the girls or Ichigo's friends were reading, and Ichigo knows it because he was convinced to watch/read it as bonding.

It's a world of magic and fantasy, where words and names have power and things go bump in the night ever so easily. Ichigo and his Family find themselves in a cozy little hideaway, all confused but happy and relieved to be alive and with each other. Isshin in this au will be an awkward, not the best father but he loves and he tries, and he just wants the best for all of his children. (He is the unsarcastic B+ parent, because with all the shit in this au coming, Ichigo deserves this).

Isshin in their original world is descended from a sword wielding samurai family, and he's had the forms and everything beaten into him since he was young, and the reason why he never taught Ichigo was because he didn't know how to be a gentle teacher and he never wanted to hurt his boy. (it's why he's always given his children freedom and choice of what they want.) And coming into this new world, this new place, everyone can feel a change in their bodies, can feel power in their veins even if they don't know what to do with it. See, Ichigo's mom had a little something funky with her blood but didn't know it and Isshin is actually a human with spiritual powers but with their original world it never came out, and with the God giving them a boost/perks, everyone is learning how to control themselves first and foremost.

It's after a bit of convincing and Isshin making Ichigo promise to tell him if he's going too hard that he starts teaching him the family style, along with others in scrolls with phantom teachers to guide them along. It is rough, it is harsh, but it's Ichigo so he pushes on through and becomes better for it. (The two do agree to see if they can find better teachers for the girls though, as Karin wouldn't suit this style even if she would be good with a sword, and Yuzu seems like she would be better with magic then a blade.)

The family of four spends like three years here, learning all they can, devouring every book and all they can remember of the OG!Story of this place before they all have exhausted all the sources and knowledge of the cottage, can no longer progress in their skills as they have been, and had enough cabin fever to drive any sane person down the river. But they're not stupid, so first things first, Isshin scouting at first, then with his son, before him and Ichigo take turns exploring and scouting the area because they don't like leaving the twins alone. But as they're getting a lay of the land and comparing maps and such to reality, even getting a feel for their new magic gadgets and all, they come across monsters and such here and there Once Isshin is sure that Ichigo can handle himself, its only then they spilt so one can stay with the girls while the other explores for a few days, even if Ichigo is only allowed to do it for two days to his father's week.

After that, packing everything they need into magic bags and hammer space, the family takes one last look to their home of all these years, bows in thanks before they are off. It's not long till they join a trade caravan, Isshin trading his skills as a doctor to do so. They travel around for a bit, before in the end, they settle down in a bustling, safe city that never fell in the story, even if the story's protagonist and gang lives here with all their wacky and troubling hijinxs.

So, now that backstory and such is out of the way, let's get to some of the fun stuff. :3

Ichigo does not realize just how strong he actually is; see, in this world of magic and stuff, swords are... technically considered obsolete; of sure, in the story there is a Magic Swordman who is part of the Protagonist's party, but even there they mostly use the sword as fancy focus then to actually fight with it. But with the way Ichigo was trained, as well as both his and his father's lack of common sense for this world, for them it is as easy to cut down a monster as it is to cut down spells themselves. Neither Ichigo or Isshin understand how insane that is, because once a spell is out, you usually have to dodge it or hope it hits someone else if you can't counterspell it.

The Kurosaki's also avoid the Protag and his crew; lets not get involved in your drama, please and thank you (lol, just had the thought of how protective Isshin and Ichigo would get if the story was with a Harem Protag; both would be protective as heck over the twins because with either reverse or regular harem, girls usually get the shit end of the stick). Ichigo is just fine how he is, even if he keeps getting into fights because of random assholes, his charm flowing out and getting his own loyal friends without his knowing. Karin is way too interested in magical sports to care not to mention her age while Yuzu is getting fascinated by potions, alchemy, and cooking to care.

One day, after Ichigo has been feeding some tidbits to some strays, he finds what seems to be a tea and candy shop, with books to read. it doesn't have much business, being out of the way like it is, but there is the occasional regular coming out. Ichigo shrugs, he has time and so he enters this Urahara Shoten.

Somehow, someway, he ends up making friends with Geta-boshi, who as frustrating as he is, recommends good books and a listening ear. Things lead to one things, stuff happens, and Ichigo finds out this guy also has sword.

Sparring partner acquired, though it takes some convincing, a bit of bribing, but Ichigo is able to get the other to agree; he gets his ass beat easily, but Urahara is a harsh, but good teacher, and so Ichigo just thrives in the challenge.

As for Urahara, this guy is so fucking terrifying, just like in canon, how he is assassin sharp and quick with his blade even as he can spellcast at the same time, just watching Ichigo cut through his spells to meet his blade.

Kisuke: this is the most fun I've had in ages :D I wonder what else he can do if I don't tell him what's impossible.

These two end up getting involved in some harsh canon event disasters, Ichigo fighting with Kisuke, knowing the other man won't let him down. Kisuke, having someone he can trust lead the way, knowing, having faith the other can survive alongside him...

Just, these two bonding, getting closer, Ichigo introducing his sisters and Goat-Face who is giving that weird stare.

(On Isshin's part, he recognizes what's going on, and for all that he is not going to be a hypocrite, is not going to kick this Urahara guy as hard as he can and hide Ichigo away, he suddenly... completely understands Misaki's family's cold and hard stares as he had gotten, watching how the elder blond stares at his 20 year old son like he is sun, like he can't believe there is any light in his life again after being shadowed so long. He's pretty sure that is the same stare he had given Misaki as well, just as how Ichigo looks softer, warmer, happier the minute that Urahara guy stays by his side, just how his mother would melt around him despite her expression never changing.

So, Isshin won't say anything, especially since he can tell neither has a clue... but he will be doing the protective, embarrassing Father as much as he wants.)

So yeah, this is the idea :3 I also have another idea with a Mob Protagonist!Ichigo, where he comes to be a character never even mentioned in a story, and ends up charming local shop owner Urahara Kisuke, who is secretly the terrible, scary Puppet Master Benihime without knowing it. maybe I'll note it out when I feel like it, though if people want, they can ask questions about it.

[antimonyandthyme]

martian; retirement (as told by oscar)

They do a massive barbecue at the end of Seb’s visit. Mark’s steaks have been soaking in some special homemade marinade for precisely six hours. He’s got enough potatoes to feed a farm.

He forgets the salad.

“You forgot the salad,” Seb says. He sounds absolutely delighted. He’s sounded this way ever since Mark picked him up at the airport. But even more so at the moment. “All that talk about this being the best meal I’ll get this side of town, and you forgot the salad.”

“He’ll never let me live this down,” Mark says.

“I won’t,” Seb confirms.

Oscar owes it to Mark to help, just a little bit. “Isn’t there a Woolworths just around the corner?”

Mark’s face does something very funny. It takes a moment for Oscar to realize Mark’s sulking, like he’s genuinely upset he has to get salad from a store. Like it’s not going to be good for Seb or something. As if Mark could put a burnt steak in front of Seb, and Seb wouldn’t eat as if his life depended on it. How do you go from crashing into each other to this?

Seb checks Mark in the hip, and pries the tongs out of Mark’s unwilling hand. Oscar watches as their fingers tangle, not so briefly, before they separate. “I won’t let the meat burn, I promise.”

Mark sighs, and goes to grab the car keys.

“Do me a favour,” Seb says, “accompany him for me, will you? Don’t let him get lost at the salad bar.”

“Do my best,” Oscar says. Something in Seb’s tone makes Oscar look. Really look. At Mark standing in front of the chilled chafing dishes containing coleslaw and mixed greens.

At Mark staring right past, lost in thought.

Oscar reaches for a takeout container, and ladles a heap of Caesar salad in. Decides to get a little fancy and scatter some goat cheese atop. He clears his throat, and Mark nearly jumps.

“I’ve had this before,” Oscar tries. He’s gunning for it blind here. “Totally decent salad. I’m sure Seb wouldn’t mind.”

Mark lets out a small chuff of laughter. “You could give him a slice of toast and he’d thank you for it.”

“Okay,” Oscar says. He clicks the tongs in his hand for something to do. Ting ting. Then he reaches for another takeout container, and spoons the Thai salad in. The more the merrier, Seb would agree. “So why—?”

“I keep trying to convince myself this wouldn’t be the last I see of him for awhile.”

“It won’t,” Oscar protests. “He’s retired now. He has more time.”

“For his bees, and the sailing, and the exploring, and the whatever that comes after retirement. So what should I say? Stay here instead?”

There isn’t an answer for that. Oscar can’t pretend he’s ever wanted that of someone. Maybe someday. Maybe never. Seb and Mark don’t seem to be enjoying it. The wanting that of someone.

The containers are getting ridiculously full. Mark doesn’t reach for them yet. So, delicately, Oscar sprinkles a layer of sesame seeds on top.

“We’ve been apart so often,” Mark says, unprompted. “We’ve had our own schedules most of our lives, and this isn’t any different. I know I’m being silly.”

“You’re not,” Oscar says. It doesn’t feel strange, saying that to someone he looks up to in every which way possible. Someone in charge of his future. He wants that devastation wiped off Mark’s face. “I’ve seen how you look at each other.”

It’s how Mark’s gaze is turned upwards whenever Seb’s telling a story, like a plant searching out the light. It’s how Seb’s eyes dance across everyone in the room before landing on Mark. Floating away, then settling back. Floating away, then settling back again. It’s never grandiose declarations like, Stay here with me forever. It’s the drifting, through landscape after landscape, and the returning each and every time.

“Maybe,” Oscar says, “if you asked.”

“If I asked, he would.”

Which is why Mark will never. Oscar knows that much about love, at least. Something about letting go. He snaps the lids of the containers shut. Mark trails after him, and only shakes out of his stupor when Oscar tries to pay for the salads.

Seb greets them at the door with an anxiousness Oscar’s familiar with. Tongs in his hand, Ting ting.

“Did you get lost?”

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” Oscar says. Next to him, Mark stiffens. “Do you know how many varieties of salad Woolworths has?”

Mark presents the containers to Seb with a flourish. Their fingers overlay. Oscar imagines pressing his own hands on top, like Stay, stay.

Stay if you know what’s good for you.

“Oh my god,” Mark says.

The barbeque smells as if it’s caught fire.

“You like your meat well done, right?” Seb looks hopeful. He also looks like he’s on the verge of panic. Like the brief moment away from Mark had done him in. Made him forget his name, and all that comes with it, reputation and inheritance and legacy.

That gaze of Seb’s again, darting away, lingering on Mark, darting away, lingering on Mark once more.

“One forgets the salad, and one forgets the meat,” Oscar says. He kinda wants to yell at them for being idiots. He’s almost embarrassed for them both. Mostly, he’s just hungry. “The two of you deserve each other.”

But Mark’s laughing now, and Seb’s joined him, shoulders shaking. Oscar grumbles and goes to rummage around the kitchen for something edible. No one has ever said ex-Formula 1 drivers were smart. They’ve spent too long driving around in circles to understand that the quickest way from point A to B is a straight line.

Hah. That’s a good one.

There’s linguine in Mark’s cupboard, and two tins of unopened tomato sauce. Nothing goes better with potatoes than even more carbs.

“Expired in 2021,” Seb reads.

“I don’t care,” Oscar says fervently. “Can I leave the boiling of water to you, or will you burn that too?”

“I like him,” Seb says to Mark brightly. Mark gives Seb a look, watery and resigned and so fucking fond. “You’ll continue giving him a hard time for me, won’t you?”

“Do my best,” Oscar says.

[terraelbus]

AU, where Dream is a royal magician, and Ink is a court artist.

Dream belongs to an ancient family of magicians who served the royal dynasty for many generations, in general, a hereditary witcher. He lived in the yard all his life, got used to all its rules. Ink is an ordinary commoner who is interested in painting. He was disowned by his family because of the curse that was placed on Ink's mother before his birth, which is why he was born without feelings. The curse was imposed by the mother’s lover as revenge, since the son was not his, it sounded like this: “This devilish offspring will ruin the life of your entire family, including himself, he will never find happiness, you will suffer with him!”. And so it happened, Ink’s parents kicked him out of the house, because in order to earn at least a little bread for himself, he decided to sell his paintings in the square. There the king noticed him and offered to become a court artist.

Life in the palace is difficult for everyone, and in order not to be left alone, he struck up a friendship with the court magician. They talked a lot, Dream gradually fell in love, and Ink, seeing this, decided why not play along and reciprocated. But there were no feelings, because he didn't consider himself to owe anything to Dream, for him it was good sex and nothing more.

Another one was also unlucky enough to fall in love with this soulless monster. It was Error, the unsociable and secretive minister. He passionately desired him, but knowing about the Drink’ relationship, he didn't understand how to intervene. Once, while visiting the royal magician on business, he noticed a bottle with, as Dream put it, a love potion or simply an aphrodesiac. He stole it, intending to use it on Ink. And so it happened, they had sex.

When Dream found out about the betrayal, he flew into a rage and in his heart turned his unfaithful lover into a donkey. When the emotional storm subsided, he regretted the haste of his decision; he should have at least talked first, and then cast spells. But it was too late, Ink, or now the donkey, hovered at his feet and bleated something in goat language.

Dream didn't know a spell that could turn Ink back into a human. Will he really remain in this guise forever?

[And I haven’t thought of anything else yet. This AU has been haunting me all week, it was written based on the song “Король и Шут - Ведьма и осёл”, if anyone is interested, I highly recommend listening to it]

АВ, где Дрим - королевский маг, а Инк - придворный художник.

Дрим принадлежит к древнему роду магов, которые многие поколения служили королевской династии, в общем потомственный ведьмак. Он всю жизнь жил во дворе, привык ко всех его порядкам. Инк же обычный простолюдин, увлекающийся живописью. От него отреклась семья из-за проклятия, которое наложили на мать Инка до его рождения, потому тот родился без чувств. Проклятие наложил любовник матери в качестве мести, так как сын был не от него, оно звучало так: "Это дьявольское отродье испортит жизнь всему твоему роду, в том числе и себе, он никогда не обретёт счастье, ты с ним ещё намучаешься!". Так и произошло, родители выгнали Инка из дома, потому чтобы заработать себе хоть немного на хлеб, он решил распродать свои картины на площади. Там его заприметил король и предложил стать придворным художником.

Жизнь во дворце сложна для всех,и чтобы не оставаться одному, он завязал дружбу с предворным магом. Они много общались, Дрим постепенно влюблялся, а Инк, видя это, решил, почему бы не подыграть и ответил взаимностью. Но чувств-то не было, потому он не считал себя чем-либо обязанным Дриму, для него то был хороший секс и ничего более.

Кое-кому также не повезло влюбиться в этого бездушного монстра. То был Эррор, нелюдимый и скрытный министр. Он страстно возжелал его, но зная об отношениях Дринков, не понимал, как ему вмешаться. Как-то раз, посещая королевского мага по делам, он заприметил будылёк с, как выразился Дрим, любовным зельем или по простому афродезиаком. Он украл его, намереваясь использовать его на Инке. Так и вышло, они переспали.

Когда Дрим прознал об измене, он пришёл в ярость и в сердцах превратил неверного любовника в осла. Когда эмоциональная буря улеглась, он пожалел о поспешности своего решения, надо ведь было хотя бы поговорить сперва, а потом заклинаниями разбрасываться. Но было уже поздно, Инк, или теперь ослик, вился у его ног и что-то блеял на ослином.

Дрим не знал заклинания, которое могло бы обратить Инка вновь в человека. Неужто он навсегда останется в таком обличае?

[А дальше я не придумала пока. Эта АВшка не давала мне покоя всю неделю, она написана по мотивам песни "Король и Шут - Ведьма и осёл", если кому интересно, очень рекомендую послушать её]

[quitealotofsodapop]

[he needs to in-turn "steal" energy from other life sources in order to keep both of them healthy/alive.]

...theoretically, if Macaque was sitting on a bench in a mall when it's full of people...how noticable would that be?

Macaque is able to steal tiny "bites" of energy from people if he's close enough to their shadows, but its like eating pieces of popcorn - takes a lot to be filling. The real meal would be to eat the whole being - which is a bad idea cus thats murder, no matter how much the baby craves hearts of their enemies.

When Mac gets into doing shadow puppet shows, he quickly uses the shows as a way to "cheat" on his diet. Viewers always leave his plays amazed but exhausted.

Again, Wukong can survive getting a lot of energy stolen. Him and Macaque can transfer energy via simply cuddles and eating together. But if they're apart for too long...

Minor Demon-of-the-Week: "A-ha! A lone little monkey demon all on his own! This will an be easy-" Macaque, eyes already glowing: "GET OUT OR I WILL EAT YOU." Minor Demon: "oh shit my bad. You want a live goat instead?" Macaque: *pounces on new meal, loud ripping sounds filling the air* Pigsy, spraying Mac with water: "NO! I told you not to do that inside!"

There's been some close calls too. Macaque has come very close to losing control and just straight up eating someone; triggered by him and Wukong having a fight and being separated for sometime. Mac sees this as a very embarassing symptom.

*while Shadowpeach was on break * Princess Iron Fan: "Brother, are you ok in there? Do you need me to get you anyth-!" Macaque: *a complete mess, sobbing while eating the machinery of a bull clone like they're chips* "I miss my husband!" PIF: "Oh the irony. I'll bring you a nice Stone Monkey heart if you'd let me." Macaque: *honestly considers. Goes back to trying to eat the tv instead*

Meanwhile SWK is back at the noodle shop, on his 25th bowl of noodles; Tang and Pigsy giving him advice on how to actually apologise to Mac for their fight.

It ends up ok with Shadowpeach back together, but now the Bull Clones are terrified of Mac and SWK owes Pigsy a blood oath-worth in food.

[cosmic-d1ce]

"before Forever, before the island. Who was he and why is Etoiles so interested???"

oh my god ow the fucking shot through the chest this was omgggggggg not only asking about what happened from the source (phil) but who he was before- when he had an isolated identity AAAAAAAAAA THEMMMMM ETOILES THE FUCKING GOAT AS PER USUAL NOTHING LESS TO BE EXPECTED OMGGGG also the idea of him being his best friend in this au is so like emotional to me- to have phil be put through so much pain all the time at all angles, emotionally and physically to have at least Someone just One person to turn to who sees past the servers lies and rumors omg the agony this is amazing they're my roman empire too I literally brainrot abt them all the time

The song Milk by Jack Stauber is pretty much exactly what they have

The song is technically about death, thinking of a dead person you didn't know but I feel like it works so well because a part of Phil is dead. The part of him that really matters to Etoiles

Etoiles doesn't care about what Forever forced Phil to be. He cares that somewhere, there's a person who used to have friends and a family and a nice little house that he made with his own hands

What kind of life did you live through? Did you know love? Will you rest in peace? Did you have a family?

Who was Phil before Forever changed him?

That's all Etoiles cares about.

It's okay that Phil can't fight things! He used to!! He used to fight and laugh and help people, he used to explore and build and discover!! That's who he really is. Etoiles can see that, even when nobody else can

He even manages to get some of that back. Phil, finally, has a way to get back a part of himself that he lost through Etoiles. He can laugh and explore and make things again and he doesn't have to worry about what Forever will think because he's not here!! He's not here and Etoiles would risk everything for Phil because they're FRIENDS!!

Phil can't hold a weapon anymore but he can hold Pomme and tell her grand stories about the man he used to be, the empire he built, the world he created for himself, his friends and his family. He can hold Etoiles' daughter and tell her how to build things, how to properly shoot a bow and arrow or how she should always avoid ravines!

Etoiles sees this man for the first time and goes "I want to know you" and when he's told what happened through other people's perspectives he says "NO. Nonono I want to know YOU." and he ASKS and he CARES!!! He hears the rumors and says "There has to be more to Phil than Forever."

Cellbit pulls him aside to explain everything properly and Etoiles turns away and says he doesn't believe in secondary research and he's going straight to the source, thank you!! If this is not an invitation to kill Forever for what he did to Phil HE DOES NOT WANT TO KNOW!!

Etoiles knows that somewhere, in another world, where none of this happened, they're best friends. They're besties and they play fight and do dungeons together because that's what they like to do.

Etoiles will settle knowing it could have been.

[scarfacemarston]

saw your post saying that you want ideas for Fenris, so here's my 5 cents;

You know the romance ending for Fenris? Whenever I see it and I hear Varric say "a hero was born" for some reason that makes me think that it is giving us the idea that Fenris has become a dad, soooooo, any thoughts on Fenris as a dad?

Have a good day/night

Hey! I LOVE that idea. Seriously, that is so heartwarming to think of. It's been months since I've written hc and I've never written for Fenris before, but I hope you like it! I have bonus hc's from the crew below the cut. Background: Despite being together for over several years since Act 3 and the fact that they might as well have been married, Varric and crew still found themselves surprised to hear that Fenris and Hawke were pregnant/adopting. "Broody with a Broody Jr on the way? I knew it'd happen at some point; you owe me 50 coppers, Rivani."

If pregnant - Hawke was initially worried Fenris would leave them because of their first night together, but he had proven himself loyal to a fault numerous times, the thought thankfully disrupted quickly.

Fenris is the worrying warrior until after the baby is born, or if adopting, til they bring them home.  His mind is always going a mile a minute risk calculation and problem-solving for things that haven't yet happened. Hawke has to get him to snap out of it. He's extremely attentive partially because he tries to think about any possible situation and discomfort and how to avoid it. If Hawke is pregnant, he's ready, whether through ginger tea, soothing balms, hot towels, massages, craving outings, you name it.

It's not original, but the baby would definitely be named Bethany, Leandra, or Malcolm if it's a son. With adoption, he feels a little more in control. (I love the idea of Fenris having a daughter, so that's what I'm using her. Feel free to hc differently!)

The baby loves his voice. Adores it. She perks up whenever Fenris speaks, even if it's the quietest of murmurs or humming. Fenris would talk to the baby if his partner is pregnant, calming her down, especially if she starts kicking.  

He doesn't mind getting up in the middle of the night to take care of her. He's lived on such little sleep before, but this was something worth it. He sometimes likes the quiet to reflect on his new life and gaze at the miracle in his arms.

Fenris has to be reminded to put her down sometimes so Hawke can hold her ---then Hawke has to be reminded to put down the baby so they can get work done.

Definitely lots of story time together and time spent reading books together. 

He wants his child to be curious about the world and not be afraid to question why things are the way they are. He encourages her to ask difficult questions, even if it's something he doesn't always want to answer. He will try to answer in an age-appropriate manner anyhow.

Incredibly protective. He never thought he'd have a family, and now he has someone who depends on him more than anything. He is never far from her; if he can't chase after them, she's in a playpen where he can keep watch. However, he also tells himself that falling and making mistakes is okay. Scratched knees or messes are to be expected. Fenris becomes very good at toeing the line between being protective and allowing her to pick herself up and figure out solutions "by herself." (Of course, he'll still be there to kiss it better or give her a boost.)

He and Hawke agree that they'd rather gift her love and time than gifts.

Somehow, Fenris has ended up with an extra Malbari, 2 cats, and a goat as pets.

He teaches her a lot of skills, Lots of nature excursions, and teaches her things like navigation, plant identification, starting a fire, and helping her learn a language. 

He and Hawke agree to teach her self-defense once she's old enough. He's a firm & thorough but patient teacher.

He and Hawke believe she should do whatever she pleases with her body. Does she want long-flowing hair? He'll show off his braiding skills. Does she want chopped hair like FemHawke? Done. 

If she turns out to be a mage, Fenris would accept it. He would know that was a possibility whether she was biologically theirs - because of Hawke's mage line or, if adopted, that it is a randomized gene. He would be lying if he didn't think their lives would be easier if she wasn't a mage - but that is because he is worried for her and the current politics - not so much because of his past treatment of mages. It would take him a little time to process it, but he would love her just the same……….he only hopes that Hawke or one of their friends can help with the magic because turning the floor into an ice rink or the smell of burnt hair can only be tolerated for so long.

Bonus:

The Hawke crew isn't always around, but I like to hear them stay in touch and visit. Maybe they still travel together. I hated the idea of them breaking up.

Varric has most definitely written a few adventures with her in mind - one being a talking animal version of Hawke's adventures. Another about griffons and another about malbari adventurers.

Merrill brings the sweetest gifts and loves telling stories and taking her foraging. Flower crowns are a must.

Isabela develops a liking for stuffed plushies. It started with a stuffed parrot, and before they knew it, the bed was crowded with stuff like Malbari, parrots, griffon, cats, and whatever she could find. Isabela also gives her her first pirate sword. Baby Hawke loves her jewelry.

Aveline - mage or not - offers to train her in combat. Of course, Hawke laughs and says, "She's a baby. I think she's fine for now." She'd offer to babysit - Hawke having a child really has her curious about starting her own family with Donnic when they can find the time. Donnic makes her a set of cards so she can "play" diamondback with them.

Anders offers medical care if he is around and also offers to tutor her in magic - but I think we all know what Fenris' thoughts on that would be. Still, Fenris would begrudgingly be thankful for any care he provided.

[silvergolddraco28]

Hazbin Hotel- RP Starter/prompt- Caged Dove- Radioapple

DM if interested or comment please!

()()()()

*a dark void with a bright doorway stretched before a figure as they ran for the light a hand reaching out toward it. Pale human skin over five fingers flashing to charcoal black over wickedly long clawed four fingers with golden scar-like cracks and back to five pale ones.

“Give her back! You're not ta-ah!”

They tripped cracking to the ground of the void glancing down at their taunt leg to the ankle wrapped in a glowing acid-green chain that was slithering up while a green-tainted black shadow curled around their other leg.

“Mama being mean to Papa. Mama needs a time out.” a child’s voice spoke from the doorway as the blurry form of a golden-haired little girl in a red dress stood beside a tall male-like form holding her hand.

“Dont worry my fawn. Papa will make sure Mama learns his lesson this time on trying to fly away without permission.” a male voice drowned in radio static spoke while a glowing green grin and red eyes came from the blurry male figure in the doorway picking up the little girl and seeming walking away.

“No* STOP!”

**Thump!**

“Ow…” a blond male groaned rubbing his head from where he had smacked it against the edge of a small table set beside the bed. “Not another nightmare…”

The door of the small bedroom opened as a little girl of five or six sleepily stood in the doorway rubbing her blue eyes while dragging a pair of cute goat plushies with little butler outfits. “Mama? Bad dream?” the child asked as the male chuckled.

“Yeah. Come on Charchar, little ducklings need to eat breakfast before we finish packing and head to our new house.” the male stated to the little girl as he got up tossing the covers back into the bed to the time being as he padded over to the girl and picked her up getting a happy squeal and giggling.

“Pancakes!” the little girl happily giggled.

“Pancakes it is.” the male chuckled as he passed a few boxes several marked with childish draws and a name.

‘Charlie’s Toys’ ‘Charlie’s Clothes’ ‘Charlie’s Books’ and ‘Lucifer’s Stuff’ were a few of the things written on the few boxes in the hall. Said hallway was empty of most personal belongings. “Since this is gonna be our last breakfast in the apartment do you want to make applesauce pancakes?” the male, Lucifer, asked,

“Yeah! Special pancakes!” The little one, Charlie, agreed happily. Lucifer smiled nuzzling Charlie playfully before he stilled Ashe looked around the kitchen. It felt *off* to that sixth sense he had that was screaming at him there was danger and to get Charlie away from the danger. His eyes darted about the kitchen before he spotted it. The door to the balcony was cracked open. They were on the first floor of the apartment building. It wouldn't be hard for someone to lean a tall enough ladder to sneak inside and try to rob the apartment.

**”Time to die demon sum.”** a female voice snarled from his left in a language he had never heard before yet almost instantly knew as he moved out of the way of being slashed by a *golden sword* held by a one armed female in tight black and silver clothing, an angel wing pendant hanging from her neck while rage and furry were in her golden eyes.

**”This is for Adam and my sisters!”** the female hissed as she swung wide managing to getting small nick on Lucifer’s cheek as he moved. A nearly burning warmth spread through Lucifer’s body, pulsing from his back, hands, and lower abdomen as he was cornered against the hallway mirror that showed a reflection of the woman attacking him having large white wings with a black pattern on the edges.

The mirror rippled at the ‘burning touch’ with red and gold energy arching along the frame before swiftly sucking the male and child into the mirror that shattered seconds later under the blade of the woman.

()()()()

High in a blood-red sky a bright golden ‘star’ burst into life with many eyes watching the ‘star’ shoot across the sky getting closer to the ground.

A young woman with an x over her eye narrowed the other seeing what other’s couldn't in that light. Without much choice the plucked her phone from her pocket and swiftly dialed a number she never thought she would have to call. The line rang twice before it connected. “I’m down town. Tell me you’ve noticed the meteor currently in the sky above Pentigram from your tower, Radio Demon.”

End Starter

[somethingclevermahogony]

Writeblr Interview

Rules: Answer the Questions

Thanks for the tags @mk-writes-stuff, @the-golden-comet, and @tildeathiwillwrite!

Short stories, novels or poems?

Novels or Epic Poems (Odyssey, Iliad, Aeneid, Epic of Gilgamesh is the GOAT (the officiant literally quoted it at my wedding)).

What genre do you prefer reading?

Fantasy or Epic Poetry. I haven't actually sat down and read a book in a while though, my life has been pretty overwhelmed with academic papers and such.

What genre do you prefer writing?

Fantasy, preferably High/Epic Fantasy, turn world-building up to the max.

Are you a planner or a write-as-i-go kind of person?

I do a ton of planning for the world (I'm a lore nut) and I plan out broad narratives and directions, but I tend to let the path to get there just sort of happen.

What music do you listen to while writing the story?

That depends on what I'm writing. I actually don't tend to listen to a lot of music when I'm actually writing because it distracts me. I listen before I start to write, what exactly I listen to changes.

Sometimes I listen to the same song from Little Shop of Horrors, Epic the Musical, or whatever. For awhile I was listening to Prom Queen by Beach Bunny over and over and over and over again. I don't know why I do that, it just scratches my brain.

Fav books/movies

I love the Gregor the Overlander Series. It balances silliness and fantasy with darkness. The worldbuilding is complex enough to be intriguing and yet so ridiculous that you just sort of accept it. Giant talking rats and Victorian Rats living in a massive subterranean world underneath NYC? Why not! The books made my mom cry over a cockroach so there's that.

As previously stated, Epic of Gilgamesh is great, its so interesting to see all the tropes and story beats already developed thousands of years ago. I love my two big burly bronze age queers.

Saying the LOTR movies feels like a cope-out, but I genuinely do love those movies.

Any Current WIPs?

The Testaments of the Green Sea series! I'm sure you've seen random tidbits on Tumblr if you've been in any of the worldbuilding or fantasy writing places.

If someone were to make a cartoon out of you, what would your standard outfit be?

Reading glasses worn too far down my nose, a button up shirt (probably blue checkered) with the sleeves rolled up, baggy jeans, and black shoes. Looks like a young chubby and scruffy caveman cosplaying as a 45 year-old English teacher.

Create a character description of yourself.

He was of average height, though he looked taller than he actually was owing to the mane of hair which surrounded his head and covered his shoulders and upper back in a blanket of brown curls. His beard and moustache were both of medium length, though his moustache was in need of a trim. A pair of fingerprint smudged, wire-rimmed glasses sat on the tip of a crooked and humped nose, as far away from his heavy brows and green eyes as they could be while still maintaining their grip on his face. He wore a checkered blue and white button up, the sleeves hastily rolled up to his elbows. His jeans were baggy, and though he hated to admit it, were swiftly developing a hole on the inner thigh. He's was normally a quiet man, prone to sit and nod, rather than to speak. The exception of course, was with his wife, in which case he could hardly be made to shut up.

Do you like incorporating people you actually know into your writing?

Literally putting people I know into my writing? No, I don't think it would really work to randomly insert my friends and family into my fantasy setting. I do like taking bits of inspiration from people though!

Are you kill-happy with the characters?

I guess that depends on what this means...because my series takes place over vast lengths of time, almost everyone in my stories does die eventually, but that's just nature. I don't shy away from killing my characters, that's for sure, though I try to make sure it adds something to the plot, I don't like killing characters just for the sake of it.

Coffee or Tea while writing?

Tea (The real answer is wine)

Slow or Fast writer?

Fast writer, sloooow editor.

Where/who/what do you find inspiration from?

Lots of things. A big part of my inspiration comes from the ancient civilizations that I study, like the Hittites and Mycenaeans. I also take inspiration from my family and my wife. Myths are a big inspiration too, I've said plenty of times that my MC, Narul, is Gilgamesh with social-anxiety.

If you were put into a fantasy world, what would you be?

Dead....or less pessimistically probably the local baker/cook.

Fave book cliche?

Found Family! Honorable mention for Gentle Giant characters!

Least fave book cliche?

Dark/High Fantasy including explicit depictions of SA or underage stuff because its "accurate", just the implication will suffice, I don't need that nonsense playing in my ear while I'm at work, thank you very much (Looking at you GRR Martin, or as my wife and I call you, JarJar Martin)

Fave scenes to write?

Scenes with nature or monsters! Trying to be descriptive and convey what the characters are seeing and feeling is really interesting to me!

Most productive time of day for writing?

Between 1:00 and 4:00 in the morning, unfortunately. That's also when my typos are the worst.

Reason for writing?

To bring my characters to life and to share their stories and scenes with other people.

I don't know how many people have already done this so I'm just gonna leave this one open!

Blank list under the cut:

Short stories, novels, or poems?

What genre do you prefer reading?

Are you a planner or a write as I go kind of person?

What music do you listen to while writing?

Favorite books/movies?

Any current WIPs?

Create a character description of yourself:

Do you like incorporating actual people you know into your writing?

Are you kill happy with your characters?

Coffee or Tea while writing?

Slow or fast writer?

If you were in a fantasy world, what would you be?

Most fav book cliche:

Least favorite cliche:

Favorite scene to write?

Reason for writing?

[theexaltedbride]

Dead Island 2 Slayers X Reader Headcanons (Part Two!)

(Since so many people liked the first one, and some even asked me for more, I decided to let my muse run wild again. Having a great time with the game so far and I hope you all enjoy the little stories that have sprung up from my playthrough and can have a good time with your favorite slayer(s). If you feel I missed any characters or areas it’s because I haven’t heard or seen them yet and I’m writing based on what inspiration comes to me.)

Amy:

-Amy won’t immediately admit it, but sometimes she wonders if she made the right choice in giving up her seat to other people on a previous evacuation flight. It can be hard to keep up the morale, but then you remind her that it was thanks to that which let the two of you meet, and that since then Amy (and the others) have saved so many innocent lives. Not only did Amy make the right choice, you remind her that so many people owe everything to her because of it.

-Sometimes she forgets to work out the kinks in her muscles, and likes to say that she can handle it. But when you put your hands on her and begin working the knots out of her shoulders and back, she melts into your touch and allows herself to be vulnerable with you.

-Always appreciates when you can bring her some chewing gum, especially if it has some good flavor to it or has a nice scent, so she can use it to ignore the rotting stench in the air around the zombies.

-Whenever you start humming or singing or playing the Rocky montage music it just causes Amy to laugh uncontrollably. It gives her that little bit more spirit, and she returns the favor by sometimes acting like a sports announcer when you are training in gym back at Emma’s mansion.

-She always loves giving you a quick peck of a kiss after a successful fight. If you want more you’ve got to catch her (good luck, she can easily run circles around you).

-Once when you were alone, she admitted it was always her dream to win the gold at the Paralympics, but that she’d happily give it up to spend the rest of her life with you safe and away from all the fighting and killing. Sometimes when she thinks no one is looking, she has a little cross she will pull out and use to pray, and she prays for your health and safety, and that if anything happens to her, that you will survive and heal from the loss of her.

Bruno:

-Nearly got shocked to death trying to charge his phone from a Shocking Walker, but you managed to shove them away with a rubber tire, and saved Bruno’s life, this is how you both met, and he gave you directions back to Emma’s mansion where the others could help him, he’s been on you like glue since then.

-If you let him, he will go on and on about whatever internet based shows or media he’s into, and will give your stuff at least a three episode try before he makes a decision of if he’s into it or not.

-Sometimes can get too far into Gen-Z slang when talking about you, to the point you have no idea what he’s saying, but from the joy in his eyes you know he cares about you and is praising you.

-He has dozens of music playlists saved on his phone, three of them are specifically tailored to you, for you, or which remind him of you.

-Over at the Goat Pen mansion he acted like a DJ and got on the mike, announcing to all the zombies that could hear about how amazing you are and how the Zeds better run because the two of you were gonna make today special by going for a world record in zombie kills. 

-Once got super pissed off when some influencer survivor started insulting your fashion choices and he practically spoke in tongues from how he swapped languages in his anger and just couldn’t even focus on his words. No one talks bad about his lover, especially not some fake ass industry plant looking influencer who sold out to the big companies before they even hit it big. 

Carla:

-Carla is proud of her size and strength, never missing a chance to boast about it, especially if you show signs of being into it. When you cuddle or sleep together, you are absolutely the little spoon, and sometimes she likes to joke about crushing your head between her thighs, but if you act like you like it she will start blushing hard and have no idea what to say next.

-She likes to boost your confidence by sometimes letting you one up her during a sparring match at the Gym back in Emma’s house. Half of fighting is keeping the proper mindset, and the other half is a mix of skill and training.

-If you complain too much about how hard it is building up your muscles she will make a challenge. If you can build up your muscle mass to a certain level without enhancers or other methods of cheating, then she will start training naked with you. Is she joking? You have to get those gains to find out!

-Carla likes to be on point when fighting Zeds, trusting you to have her back while she handles the bigger enemies up ahead. She always tells you to stand back whenever you encounter Crushers.

-Genuinely hates the insect swarm walkers, or any other infected covered in insects. More than once you’ve had to brush them off of her or tell her there is nothing crawling in her hair. She’s a little embarrassed about it, but prefers not talking about it and just crushing more Zeds under her feet.

-When the two of you sit together, Cala’s always putting an arm around you and keeping you close to her, and if she’s very relaxed then she will lean her head over on your own.

Jacob:

-Won’t admit it, but he’s got a thing for cowboys and you once caught him wearing some scavenged red cowboy outfit, with a hat and boots and belt, etc. He got so embarrassed when you found him, but brightened up once you played along and reassured him there was nothing to be ashamed of. There’s no dress code for the apocalypse, and so long as he is happy, you are happy.

-Jacob is absolutely the kind of guy to roleplay in the bedroom with you (especially if it feeds into his love for old Westerns), and will play along with your own fantasies if you play along with his. 

-If you have a major issue with his smoking he will try (emphasis on try) to get it under control, but you’re gonna have to get him a lot of nicotine gum or patches. Though you could also distract him from needing to smoke by sharing a kiss with him each time the urge hits him.

-Once you had a night terror (sadly common for everyone these days) while sleeping next to him, and his normally devil-may-care, class clown, demeanor dropped. He was incredibly gentle with you, asking you if you were okay, and willing to stay up all night, just holding you until you drifted off to a more comfortable sleep again. 

-Would love to introduce you to his family, but is a little nervous as he sometimes feels that you are too good for him, and could do better than him. A fear you always remind him is untrue. You love him no matter what.

-It is slowly becoming a thing for the two of you to try and one up each other with jokes, and while it aggravates the others to hear the constant comedy routine between the both of you, its the happiest either of you have been in a while. 

Ryan:

-Absolutely has a ‘Fireman’ voice he slips into (both consciously and unconsciously) when he’s trying to impress you or put you at ease. Gets a blush if you bring it up to him when he’s doing it unconsciously. 

-Is always happy to share stories with you about his brother, but sometimes he will get sad and worry his brother might be hurt or dead...or infected. Whenever those fears come, you chase them away with a firm hug, kiss, or a promise that his brother is okay and will be the best man at your wedding.

-Is the best hypeman of the entire group when it comes to working out at the gym and always knows what to say to help you complete a set and build up your strength for battles to come.

-Whenever you feel bad about your body, Ryan will remind you of how perfect you really are. With just a gentle hold of his hand, and the shine in his eyes, its as if you are catching a second wind when you were at your lowest point.

-Ryan actually ran through fire (thanks to having real firefighter’s pants and boots) to pull you out of danger, and pulled off a good fireman’s carry to get you to safety when some oil caught fire during a fight with the undead.

-Ryan sometimes likes to get a tan when the group takes a day off, and likes to make sure he stretches or does poses when he thinks you’re watching. Sometimes it works, and other times hilarity ensues.

General group headcanons:

-If you can convince the others to try a tabletop RPG together, Luciana will instantly jump in as the GM, though she seems to hate D&D for reasons she will not explain. (Bruno has a bet going that its because Andrea fell for the Satanic panic nonsense). But for just about every RPG out there Luciana has a PDF of it ready to go, even super obscure ones almost no one plays. She’s a big nerd about the lore, theories, and stats about each game and will go on about it till she’s too exhausted to talk.

-Bruno makes movie references and got Carla laughing when he once compared her to the character Byron from Mars Attacks when he started punching out a bunch of Martians single handedly because Carla had been doing the same against a swarm of weaker Shamblers and 1 hit KO’d almost a dozen Shamblers.

-Whenever someone in the group wants to get intimate, everyone else runs interference for them so they aren’t interrupted or ruin the moment.

-Andrea has started to warm up to you the most out of all the Slayers and sometimes packs you a lunch if you’re going to be out with the group for the whole day. 

-If you can find a proper mixtape of Sam B’s songs (even beyond ‘Who do you voodoo bitch?’) he will be in a good mood at someone recognizing his songs beyond his one-hit-wonder song.

Back at Emma’s Mansion: 

-There is a general rule of ‘No Politics’ at the safehouses. Everyone has their own opinion and tensions can run hot after a difficult mission, the last thing anyone needs is fists being thrown over idiot politicians thousands of miles away. (Given some of the encounters and revelations about influencers around Hell-A, this rule is also starting to apply to them too).

-You, Sam-B, and Luciana are the ones actually making notes in the Zompedia based on encounters you’ve all had and what you’ve observed in the field. Luciana wants to turn it into a real zombie survival guide.

-Elizabeth has a near encyclopedic knowledge of random facts and data from all the different books she’s read.

-Curtis will teach you how to shoot his hunting rifle, but make the shots count, he doesn’t have infinite bullets. 

-Carlos helps you with fixing your equipment and learning to clean it without cutting yourself. 

-While Amy is the most mature of the group and tries her best to set a good example, Dani is effectively becoming team mom. She’s rough around the edges but will tell you what you need to hear even if its a tongue lashing for having messed up. 

Movie Night:

-Amy loves picking Forest Gump and will always swear that the original book is a piece of shit, and that the movie is so much better.

-Bruno picks action or heist movies, or wants to watch HBO miniseries.

-Carla’s favorite choices are the Keanu Reeves John Constantine movie, or the first Matrix movie.

-Dani is into musicals. Laugh and she will smack you on the mouth. 

-Jacob loves anything that has a Wester/Cowboy vibe to it.

-Ryan has watched that old Disney version of John Carter of Mars like four times now. 

-Carlos loves sports movies, especially from the Rocky or Creed series of movies. Though he also has a soft spot for Stand and Deliver (1988), he might be convinces to watch BSG (2003) because it also has James Edward Olmos.

-Amanda the influencer is no longer allowed to pick movies.

-Curtis loves picking his own movies and sharing behind the scenes stories about cast and crew.

-Emma never watches her own movies, while Sam B only ever wants to watch Emma’s movies.

-Elizabeth picks movie adaptations of her favorite books, and then comments the entire time about how close or different it is to the book.

-Luciana picks the nerdiest movies you can imagine, but lately has been picking the Evil Dead series, and will totally geek out if anyone quotes Ash while killing zombies.

-Andrea loves historic dramas.

-You know your own choices. The hard part is finding unbroken DVDs in Hell-A and bringing them back to the safehouse to watch. Surprisingly Patton had a couple of them.

In Patton’s Safehouse: 

-Patton really appreciated you taking a gentle tone with him, without talking down to him like a child, or getting jumpy like he was going to bite you. For this he gave you a key to his bunker.

-Has a hidden popcorn machine he uses for when anyone actually sits to watch movies with him and tends to shush people if they talk too much. 

-After the end of the game, you and the other slayers turn his safehouse into a shelter for other survivors and a home away form home for you all. 

-You are very particular about making sure Patton’s safehouse is not messy, in case he ever comes back.

[missmorwen]

Trick or treat!

\o/

Alright, this is a different WIP, also not posted yet. Working title: We Cannot Be Unmade. It takes place after Black Widow and Civil War and sort of the same time as Black Panther. So Bucky is living in Wakanda, enjoying life with his goats, with no trigger words or prosthetic arm. Then he gets a vistor...

The only warning Bucky got was a shift in the air. Less than that. The acute awareness of another human being near him when he was supposed to be alone. No sound of footsteps walking up to the Wakandan hut he’d been living in. Not one of the alarms he’d set up around the perimeter had been tripped.

He whirled. One intruder visible as an outline against the sun in the door. Hand raised and closed in a fist.

It was instinctive more than anything. And his reaction was not exactly unwarranted. Two strides took him close enough to grasp the intruder by the neck and pull them inside, slammed them up against the wall. Smaller body, muscular. Armed. He reached for the gun under her jacket with the left arm that he didn’t have these days, and she shifted, giving him a better look at her face.

Familiar. More than familiar. Known.

Natalia cocked an eyebrow at him, and he realized that even though he had her by the throat up against the wall, her hands were open and relaxed by her head. One of which she’d been about to use to knock on the side of the doorway to announce her presence when he’d attacked her.

Great. Awesome.

Bucky took his hand off her neck, doing his best not to look at the red marks he'd left there.

At least Steve wasn’t around to see this. It was definitely something that would make Steve put on that slightly constipated expression that said he was worried and if Bucky would just talk to someone, anyone, it didn't have to be him, but if he’d just talk to someone about his nightmares then they’d all go away, and probably pretty little bluebirds would come and sing at him. Or with him. He wasn’t entirely sure. Probably world peace would spontaneously happen, and Steve would feel so much better. Bullshit was what it was. Talking wouldn’t make the recurring nightmare go away.

Natalia was speaking to him, and he hadn’t heard a word of what she was saying.

He blinked.

“Come with me if you want to live,” Natalia said with a bad accent, either German or Australian as far as he could tell.

“What,” he said, then frowned when he recognized the quote. “What are you doing here?” It came out harder than he’d meant them to. It was the first time he’d seen her since Berlin, and he’d goddamn attacked her at first sight. After all the things she’d done for him. And all the shit he’d put her through, this was his way of saying thanks? He owed her his goddamn life and he’d greeted he with a hand wrapped around her throat. Disgusting was what he was.

“Do you trust me?”

And yeah, of course he did. With his life. But the words stuck in his throat. Helt back by the metric ton of apologies and pleas for forgiveness. Out of the handful of people still alive that he trusted, Natalia was the only one he’d follow blindly.

[calico-heart]

WIP excerpt of a post-Main Story Lyrha/Astarion fic.

Lyrha's cryptic pregnancy ends badly when she enters labour prematurely and complications nearly claim her life - as well as out her secret condition to Astarion. Not exactly the best way to learn you're a dad.

Tags: Dangerous Pregnancy, Unwanted Child, PTSD, Angst & Snark

"You could have died. You would have died." He snarled, "It's a miracle we're even having this conversation. Honesty, what were you thinking?"

“I was thinking it’s not your problem to deal with, so there was no reason to tell you.”

“Well I’m afraid you’ve created a fairly big problem for me, Darling.” He scoffed, hands spreading with irate disbelief, “After months of secrecy, you’ve spent days at death’s door and left me this screaming brat to tend to with no preamble." A hand flourished. Red eyes fixed on her accusingly, "Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a wetnurse for such a bedraggled little beast? Especially when you can’t enter a house uninvited, and only under cover of moonlight?” His teeth bared.

“Well I didn’ ask ye to.” Lyrha hissed, voice crackling over the edge of her pain. “When have I ever obliged of you anythin'? Never. I never planned t'involve ye at all.”

“Oh? And how did you imagine that was going to work out?” His lip twisted, “Were you going to hide it under the floorboards?”

“I was goin' to get rid a-" Her throat seized over the words, somehow too horrible to finish out loud, even after weeks of planning. Knowing. She shook her head, "I wasn' keeping it. I knew you wouldn't want it."

"Well you were right about that." He scoffed, nearly sneered. She was used to the bite of his ire, but it hurt this time. Body and mind were weak, and the knife of him slipped into vulnerable places all too easily, twisting. Lyrha flinched.

Astarion's eyes narrowed. Quieter, he asked, "…But what do you want, Lyrha?"

The temperature in the room seemed to drop. Lyrha shut her eyes, jaw clenched so tight she thought it might shatter. “I want you t’know ye don’t owe me… or the - the babe anything. I wouldn’t try t’trap ye like that.”

“I’m grateful, but that isn’t what I meant and you know it.”

She huffed, voice straining higher with each word, “I wanted never t’be in this damn situation, tryin’ t’explain things t’ye and - and…”

“Lyrha…” A heavy sigh. His gaze stayed fixed on her, searching for something. Maybe for a lie. Or a half-truth.

He surprised her again, “I’m angry. But not about the baby. You can do what you want with it.” He dismissed flatly, then leaned forward, “I’m upset because you didn’t tell me about it. We’re supposed to be in this together, in theory. You should have included me before the damn thing nearly killed you.”

She absolutely should not have. She’d seen many times what happened to women who sprang unexpected, unwanted babes on their men. Especially those who'd promised such things were impossible. Women tried to entrap their brigands all the time, and most often, at best, it got them left stranded. She deflected, “It might not even be yours.”

He laughed, harshly, once. “You haven’t seen the teeth on that thing yet. It's absolutely mine.” Something lighter twinged in his tone, though it left her more anxious rather than less. He was capricious, especially when cornered. “I suppose this rather refutes the whole ‘spawn can’t create vampires’ law.”

Teeth already? Lyrha blinked. Grimaced. Then, "… you said you found a wetnurse for it? Even-?"

Another irritable puff, "I found a goat." His voice pitched high again, "It's downstairs. Eating the furniture. But I couldn't very well keep it outside in the sun."