#he makes me so happy you guys
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#guys i cant believe this is real this is everything ive ever wanted#WILLE ABDICATION??? WILMON ENDGAME??? wille is free he's free they're both free#look at simon's face oh my GOD#ive never seen him this happy euphoric and liberated#that's CINEMA!#i have so many things to say about this ending#āare you sure you're over meā āwhat the hell do you thinkā#when wille says ācan you open the door?ā as he leaves the car and leaves the cage that is the monarchy#the door is open!!!! there is sunshine on his skin!!!! he is free oh my god#i know i havent been making gifs im sorry i promise they are coming#good god that is Television to me#young royals#yr season 3#yr s3 spoilers#young royals s3#young royals season 3#wilmon#prince wilhelm#simon eriksson#omar rudberg#edvin ryding#wilhelm x simon#wille x simon
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Evil maknae ft. cameraman Felix
#felix was helpful (good) i.n was helpful (evil) he poured that sauce for 120 frames btw. 120!#the thank you really made me laugh... evil polite and happy little guy who is tryna give you a bad time but he makes it so well!#Yang Jeongin#Lee Felix#stray kids#skz#skz gifs#stray kids gifs#bystay#createskz#staysource#jesskz#skzedit#I.N stray kids#i.n skz#lee yongbok#fav skz#vocalracha
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korvo lost and farting 0 stars for you my boy
#solar opposites#solaropposites#korvo#tervo#did any of you guys read the interview where they said#they're never going to break up but he's constantly worried that Terry's going to leave him#Yeah.#korvo being so full of self loathing and feeling undeserving of happiness to the point where once he realizes the button was pressed#he was like Ah this makes sense. Surely this life is fabricated and terry doesnāt actually love me nor do i even deserve him#all my suspicions are true!#YEAH. HOLY SHIT.#and terry reaffirming his love for him oughh guys he loves him because heās lame and stupid CALLBACK TO LOVING THE UGLY PARTS!! HELLO!!#korvo being so desperate in that episode to hold onto his family and his marriage NOT NOW KITTEN DADDY NEEDS A FUCKING CIGARETTE#and terry and korvo still falling in love in the alternate universe They would find each other in every universe bitch#korvo grabbing the what if box and burning his hands like holy hell
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#a doodley#i had to make this blue so tumblr would stop hiding it from the dash#anyway no caption this happened 2 hrs ago#im happy abt my surgery but it and other things this year keep beinging conversations like these up#and i cant handle it at all.#everything my dad tells me just makes me feel worse and not bc its anything bad but bc I Feel Bad#like the conversation then continued to him being like no dont cry im just saying i wpuld have wanted to#quit my job decades ago and set aside money so I wouldnt be struggling as much now but that didnt happen#and i just dont want that to happen to you guys :)#so we have to support u so that your life is what u want it to be#and i cried even more bc what do u mean. thats so sad. ur a person and u were a child and baby once and ur gonna die#and you always almost cry when u talk about your mom who passed away decades ago#and your brothers that passed away#recently and im going to be your age and still sobbing bc i miss my dad. just like i have been prematurely crying about since i was 7#the other day my dad asked my mom if i cried a lot when i was a baby/kid and my mom said no and then my dad#said that when i Did cry it was so severe he thought i would ''drown in my own tears''#bc i could never stop. like. thats still true today. ive been crying on and off since then#i think i mentioned he's just been telling me stories about his life lately and it further fuels this. i get so sad. im sorry your life was#like this. i dont want to die i dont want you to die im sad im sorry im sorry#im scared. im never going to see you again. how horrible. how horrible#i cant enjoy my day today bc every day is a day closer and i get sad
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#my baby my love my everything i hope u have a day as wonderful and sweet and lovely as u are#stray kids#bang chan#bang chan gifs#stray kids gifs#skz#skz gifs#my gifs#cbbc2023#ah. not to get sappy in the tags since im already using all my characters to get sappy in his bubble but. hm. he's very very very important#to me. kind of like. extremely special.#just. im so bad with words but idk if id be here without him and if i was id be deeply deeply unhappy? so im always gonna be grateful to hi#and his music and his company and his care#he's just so kind and sweet and deeply deeply caring and i know birthdays aren't special to him but i hope he gets to eat good food today#and spend time with people he loves & who love him in return and just has heaps of fun. today and every day i just hope he's happy#if he's half as happy as he makes me on the daily then i never have to wish for anything else#um. anw. silly little post for his day that did not warrant all that gut spilling. happy birthday my guy of all time. i love you
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i don't know if you guys have been keeping up with the women's world cup but this past sunday spain won against england. and you would think this would be the best moment of their careers and their lives but you wanna know what happened?
the spanish football federation's president non-consensually kissed one of the players, jenni hermoso, on the mouth when they were celebrating. this grown ass man took it upon himself to ruin the celebration for ALL the women who just achieved the thing they have been preparing for all their lives, literally the peak of a football player's career, they did it and he by himself ruined it.
and i say all the women because the other players, along 58 currently inactive and ex-players, stood up for jenni hermoso and have refused to play for the team until luis rubiales publicly apologizes and renounces his spot. now the rfef says they'll take legal action against the players and jenni for lying and because they have an obligation to play for the team.
do you remember how the men's world cup celebrations went? i do, im from argentina. no one said anything to any of the players, they were treated like kings for months and they are worshipped to this day. and rightfully so! they earned it i guess. but we do see the discrepancy?
how is it that we allow as a society for one man to sexually assault a woman right after achieving the thing another group of men got ceaselessly venerated for not even a year later? what do women have to do to earn respect? win the world cup? become the pride and joy of their country?
#im so fucking mad#literally WHAT IS IT what do we have to do#and also calling her a liar??? there's a fucking video do you have no shame#but also it makes me really happy all those women support jenni hermoso#they shouldn't need to none of this should've happened#but women ā#fuck luis rubiales fuck that guy i hope he dies#also some of the men from the argentinian football team turned out to be creeps after winning#no one said anything š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£#jenni hermoso#luis rubiales#women world cup#wwc 2023#football#feminism
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Heās just a little guy
#lloyd garmadon#ninjago#ninjago lloyd#lego ninjago#lloyd montgomery garmadon#hes literally just a baby you guys#he means so much to me#hes just a little guy#yes I drew him happy#Has he ever been happy? I donāt know.#Probably not#but still#he deserves the world#Ninjago s1#ninjago rise of the snakes#baby Lloyd#my art#my art <3#beegs art#Beegs bugs#Beegs-bugs#ninjago fanart#Jsyk#i am EXTREMELY fixated on Lego ninjago right now (I have been for a couple months actually)#it makes me so happy#the autism is strong with this one#does this count as#ninjago headcanons#yeah i think so#aughhhhh
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Whenever I feel bad I remember that Peter B was depressed af but he found joy in shipping Gwen and Miles and that he was the first person in the whole multiverse that shipped them
#him shipping them made me ship them before i even wanted to ship them if you know what I'm saying#and he didn't push it he was just like that's so cute you guys š„°#and those little things reminded him that there is still hope for a happy life#that's what gwiles does to me too lol#makes me feel happy#cuz they weren't meant to be but they met accidentally and are from different worlds#literally different dimensions#that's so cool to think about it#peter b parker#Gwen Stacy#miles morales#spider man into the spider verse#into the spiderverse#spiderverse#gwiles#ghostflower
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Something that is canon in my mind that I forget to tell people:
The reason why Steve canāt get bitches in his Scoops Ahoy era is because thereās a rumor going around that heās gay (probably because someone caught him hooking up with Eddie)
#how else can you explain it???#he is so so babygirl#all the girls would be literally at his feet begging for this man to date them#unlessā¦ they think heās trying to make them his beard#also with the lipgloss and mascaraā¦#it just adds fuel to the fire#and think. if Steve and Eddie were hooking up before scoops in a fwb gone wrong or secret relationship gone wrong type of situationā¦#aka Steve catches feelings and runs because of internalized homophobia and a fear of getting caught#there could be a season three rewrite of Steve catching feelings for Robin because she reminds him of Eddie#and after Robin comes out to him#Steveās like āoh. maybe there are more people like me in Hawkins than I imagined. if she deserves a happy ending with a girl#why canāt I get a happy ending with a guy?#and steve slowly is able to come to terms with his sexuality#meanwhile eddie seeks out Dustin and the kids who steve has ranted and raved about#but he plays it off as him happening to find lost sheep#lots of thoughtsā¦ lots of thoughtsā¦#all thoughts to explain why Steve isnāt able to get bitches#steve harrington#steddie#stranger things#scoops ahoy steve#stranger things headcanons
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ālucifer is sadistic and mean!! heās so serious and scary!!ā
meanwhile,
heās just a silly man who wishes for a domestic life with his partner and dog <3
#i love silly and soft lucifer#heās not this serious guy everyone makes him out to be i mean he conducted a necromantic ritual#TO GET HIS DOG BACK#and then introduces said dog to you because youāre important to him <33#which mirrors the way in which lucifer becomes more open to mc after they become close to his brothers!!#he just wants his favorite people to get along#this devilgram is one of the most precious things iāve ever seen#family is so important to him!! and it really shone through in this devilgram <33#and i love incorperating that into my writing as well <3#gahhh stories that portray lucifer like this (in-game or fan-made) make me so so happy#gently holds him in my hands and shuts up before i ramble on for too long#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me lucifer#obey me swd#lucifer obey me
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Curtwen Week Day 6: Happy Ending
#I like to believe that there is a universe where they get to grow old together#just one#look once upon a time I read a fic that had me bawling my fuckin eyes out where they get to grow old together#I do want to say that I believe in personal growth and I think that Curt can 100% have a happy ending without Owen- where he can grow#away from that experience and where he can healthily cope with the trauma he ended up with#where he can find solace in something other than alcohol and where he can find it in himself to forge new relationships and build his#connections with people like Tatiana#etc etc#I just want to make it known that this is one of many happy endings that could happen#(amongst the several sad ones that I know also exist)#ALSO I wanted to draw the old men and I do what I want#but yeah something something if the universe is infinite /ref#maybe this is a universe where the banana incident never happened and they were able to retire together#ough#the curtwen feels are really getting me today#I adore them#also I used a new brush ive been having fun with this past week#doesnāt it look cool?#I really like drawing with it and I like how it looks so#we might be seeing more of this one in the future#although 6b is still my guy#damn yāknow hypothetically- if Owen (depending on the au) and Curt lived to be in their 60s (at least) they would witness the first Pride#god can you imagine that?#At the very least Curt being around for stonewall and everything that came after that with queer rights#FUCK anyways#fun fact: a group of frogs is called an army#isnāt that cute#reminds me of that one person on TikTok that raised like a thousand frogs- they had a literal army of frogs#crazy#curtwen week
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Happy 10th birthday to Cercerion!
OUGHHH UR RIGHT CERCIE IS 10 YEARS OLD NOW !!!!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY BOY BELOVEDEST DID NOTHING WRONG EVER IN HIS WHOLE LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#ALSO IM RLY HAPPY HIS OLD DESIGN IS NOW MUCH OLDER THAN HIS FIRST DESIGN WOAH!!!!!!#since i drew the old one SO MUCH back in 2014 i remembered it as being so super prevalent. that when i changed his head shape a couple year#it took a while to get used to the not boxy head but god it was so much more fun to draw the beak. and now its the standard#and it makes me rly happy fr fr. i actually thought i changed his design like only 2 years ago but it was SIX YEARS WHAT!! HOW TIME FLIES..#ask#cercerion#SORRY I JJST WANTED TO REPOST ALL OF THESE#omg dude this also means u and i have known each other for 10 years thats CRAZY#this photoset is so funny its like he went from being :D to being >:U over the years but i assure you now hes more chill than before#HIS COLORS HAVE NOT CHANGED FOR EIGHT YEARS ALSO WHATTTTT i just chose the perfect hues forever#sobbing and crying i love this guy so much#i dont show him online a lot or at least i didnt as muhc until recently but hes always in my brain#cercerion may as well be a part of my soul at this point#HAPPYU TENTH BIRTHDAY CERCIE I LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLOWING KISSES INTO A HURRICANE FOR U#windyart#sure ill put it in my tag. this is literally my art
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there's no way the bathroom at peppino's pizza is actually that big but ĀÆ\_(ć)_/ĀÆ . hey ummm anyway.... i care them...... anyway there's a lil ramble on my take on fake pep's like psyche or whatever in tags on the og post if ur into that kinda thing :y
hey! it's a series! fake peppino world tour: [noise] [noisette] [peppino]<- u are here [gustavo] [gerome] [noisette again]
#ramble after realtags yeag. shoutout to serrangelic btw suggesting the silhouettes thing bc i would have Died otherwise#pizza tower#peppino spaghetti#fake peppino#gustavo and brick#arting#pizzaposting#so anyway i think fake peppino has like. a general awareness that he is supposed to Be Peppino and that he was Made to do that#and likewise he does generally try to...do that. the thing he does NOT realize is hes like really goddamn bad at it#not to be mean but like...c'mon. they are pretty distinctly different kinds of guys even beyond the physiology yknow.#he's neither on-brand nor fooling anyone dsjdsjjkgfsd. BUT!#since the rest of the cast generally likes him [at least as I play it] he thinks hes doing just fine#he's like 'oh they r happy with me so i must be getting a good grade in being peppino :)'#so getting told that 'yeah you actually really suck at that but that was never the reason people liked you'#and told that by og model peppino no less--yknow THE guy he's supposed to be living up to#who's already a bit intimidating for that and who ALSO totally wrecked him TWICE in the tower#making him acutely familiar with just how formidable the guy is and how much there IS to live up to....#it's a Moment for sure. not really a sad or hurt one though. just... contemplative.#thinking abt people liking him for being the guy he's already naturally been being even though that guy is Not Peppino#i don't think he's gonna be super broken up about realizing he has a bad grade in peppino given everything else hes got now#nor do i really think he cares enough to go like reinvent himself or whatever after the fact#he seems to b pretty clearly having fun with it already so i think he just keeps doing that#and in some cases he still has the pre-installed peppino traits/instincts like to cooka da pizza. and that's fine#is this projection. yes. but if youve been following me awhile you know most of my character writing is ghdhfdgf#gonna kinda expand on all this in the gerome one which is...one after next. itll be a bit but man.#anyway peppino will never admit to anyone and especially not himself that he's gotten a little attached to the guy. hee hoo#pep tends to be kinda surly but he certainly has his ways of showing he cares. all of which are on display here#''that thing is not my son'' says man currently watching thing's antics with the 'bemused dad' arms crossed pose. yeah ok buddy.#gus is totally onto him already but hes not gonna say anything.#if u read all this ur prize is not having to go decode fp's rot13. his lines are ''meant to be you...?'' and ''wrong question.''
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some doodles
#i meant to put the balor one in the previous post but i forgor šits in a diff file from the sketch dump i was coloring in so it just didnt#exist in my mind at all. i felt like smth was missing as i was posting it but i couldnt place what hlep#adeline and eiland have been driving me insane lately. expect more of them. probably.#dont minf the last two guys. some concepts for future farms š (pls mind them im crazy abt all my farmers even if they technically dont -#exist yet. pls ask abt them or smth pls im nroaml i can be nroma l i prommy)#fields of mistria#fom balor#sona#im gonna start tagging that i think.#fom eiland#fom adeline#fom elsie#fom farmer#my art#guys can i just say that im so happy that balor is silver n not gold cus otherwise i would have to confront a part of me im not proud of#we shouldnt talk abt it but like yeah jjust know i like his silver and his whole deal#have such a softspot n bias for characters who dont settle anywhere. who never lay down their roots or whatever. who keep their past secret#like oughh hes hitting so many marks#i like hawthorne a lot. hes more developed in my head. and also i like his dead look and hair bows. i have so many ideas abt him man it hur#i promised myself i wouldnt make a new save file til i reached y2 w rory but apperantly errols bday is cursed bc the game has frozen twice#sorry if you read all of these tags. go to my askbox w fom stuff or smth. ask abt my farmers plsplspls pl s jk haha unless. maybe even#gimme drawing reqs for fom in general. ok tyvm ly sorry for yapping. its what i do best
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H: can i wear...sunglasses and ear defenders?
W: yeah, wear whatever you want, mate.
H: ...fine.
W: hmm ^^
deadass what if i just started crying
#its only a small moment but the audhd holmes rep makes me want to sob#oauuuhh how i love them#sherlock and co#sherlock & co#not equipped for rambling#sherlock holmes#john watson#im so happy theyre doing explicitly canonical audhd sherlock holmes im EUPHORIC#established in episode 1. deadass. maintained.#its the bare minimum and im over here screaming#canon nd holmes?? in MYY adaptation?? i thought id never see the day#not that acd holmes isnt canonically nd cause lets be fuckin real here#WATSONS SO CHILL ABOUT IT TOO i love sherlock and co watson hes so so dear#genuinely nice man who chats with you at the bus stop vibe#adore him#I LOVE THE WHOLE CAST AAAHGGG#GO LISTEN TO THIS PODCAST#ITS SO MWAHH <33#the sheer joy of having a friend whos just like 'alright cool i get it' whenever youre overstimulated. guys. GUYS.#I LOVE THEMMMM#AAAUGHG#god bless this podcast
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OMGGG Your latest smut fic is so amazing!!! The smut is absolutely delicious! but....the angst is breaking my heart so...could you please write a continuation or part two where the reader confronts Aventurine's dark internal thoughts and comforts them? A fic where they actually get him to believe that they love him for real, where they tell him that he's not a monster and that he wasn't ruining them.
You've got it ! (Ėµ ā¢Ģ į“ - Ėµ ) ā§
Aventurine x Reader
You treat Aventurine with more respect than he deserves. (Part 2)
Read part 1 here !
CW: dehumanisation (internal, thoughts Aventurine has of himself, referring to himself as a āmonsterā), lots of mentions of death, passively suicidal Aventurine, violent imagery (through metaphors, nobody is actually physically harmed), intrusive thoughts, Aventurine thinks kind of vicious things about you (refers to you as "stupid", "brainless", "naive" etc), cursing.
Lmk if thereās anything else I should warn about !!
Small note: Spoiler alert sorry, but you will not completely fix Aventurine in this fic. Making any real progress would take YEARS. The trauma he's gone through and his beliefs about his own humanity are EXTREMELY deep-seated, just one conversation would not be enough to make him truly believe he was loved. Super sorry since I'm sure that's not what you wanted (you specifically requested they "truly get him to believe that they love him for real", but this does still end on a hopeful note so I hope you won't be too disappointed (ā¢į“ā¢,, ) )
Sometimes Aventurine gains enough clarity to remember where he stands. More importantly, he gains enough clarity to remember where you should stand. That is to say, as far away from him as possible. Unfortunately, you are never keen on doing that.Ā
In these moments of clarity, he distances himself. If you wonāt do it, he has to. He needs to. He needs to even when he can feel the little pieces of him that youāve managed to haphazardly glue together splinter into tiny shards again, even when it feels like every step away is a step walked on shattered glass. He can hardly be called a āpersonā anyways, what does his suffering matter? He has already lost so many good things, why not add another loss to the tally?
He reads your texts, but he doesnāt respond. He hangs up on you the moment you call. By doing this, he makes sure you know he is alive. Both because he knows it would devastate you if you thought he died, but even more so to make sure you know he is intentionally ignoring you. He hopes at least some part of you hates him. He thinks part of him hates you.
But he can never stay away for long. Like a werewolf called by the full moon; like a vampire to blood; like a siren to a sailor. Thoughts of you always cloud his mind too much to do what is right. He reminds himself he will destroy you. He comes back anyways. He is too selfish not to.Ā
And you welcome him with open arms every time. Sure, sometimes you yell. Sometimes you berate him. Sometimes you cry. But he never does something beyond the bounds of what youāll forgive, even though he tries to. Youāre patient to a fault. Though he feels bad, he never takes it fully seriously, because you always hold him with so much sweetness, even when your words are filled with righteous anger and justified hurt. You always end it by reminding him that you love him. Something clenches in his chest; something that is not his heart, because he has none. He claims he is sorry, but you both know he will do this again. He always does. You know he will hurt you over and over, even if you donāt know the extent. You know he will test you, that he will ignore you, that he will cling to you and that he will taunt you. You donāt know he will drag his claws through you and tear you to ribbons; you donāt know he will sink his teeth into your neck and drink all your blood; you donāt know he will lure you to sea and drown you. You are never aware of the true danger you are in.Ā
Maybe thatās why you one day feel comfortable enough to corner the creature that has taken on the appearance of a lover. You sit down next to him in bed one evening after one of his many attempts to push you away, your expression grim. You look straight ahead, right into his dead eyes, unaware that a monster is towering over you.Ā
āWe canāt go on like this,ā you say. For one moment, the crushing relief and devastation threatens to consume him, and heās not sure which of the feelings is stronger. For one moment he canāt breathe.Ā
He hacks our a laugh, his skin straining. Something is shifting beneath his flesh, something ugly and dangerous. He needs to leave and he needs to do it quickly.Ā
āYouāre right, we canāt,ā he agrees, his voice a lot more steady than he feels. He feels the urge to grab you and shake you until you pass out. He feels the urge to suck out your life force until your body is an empty husk. He feels the urge to slam your head into the bathroom sink in the next room over. He feels the urge to shoot himself in the head, because he does not want to do any of that.Ā
āI love you,ā you say, unexpectedly. Or maybe itās not unexpected. You always say such stupid, brainless things. (You say it with sweetness. The only sweetness he can offer in return is the sweetness of bacteria digesting rotting meat. Is the flesh his, or will it be yours?) He laughs again.Ā
āI thought we were breaking up,ā he says. Smirking, as if itās funny. (It isnāt.)
āNo, weāre really not,ā you say firmly. He snorts.Ā
āMaybe we should.ā
You donāt answer. Instead, you come closer.Ā
Get away, he thinks. Run, you fucking idiot.Ā
You donāt have many flaws, but the ones you do have are insurmountably big. You are too forgiving, you are too kind, you are too selfless, you are too naive. You will kill yourself doing this one day. You will let him kill you.
Your arms wrap around him. He canāt help but relax. The thing lurking under his human disguise grows more restless.Ā
āI donāt hate you,ā you say, unexpectedly. And this one really is unexpected, because what made you say that? Your arms squeeze around him tighter. āI thought I was being obvious enough about that, but youāre so bad at understanding it.ā
The feeling he has is the same as the feeling he gets when he realises a deal is going awry. You are the highest risk stakes he has ever made a bet on: will he ruin you, or will you ruin him? What you could do to him is so much more serious than death. He knows that he is holding a losing hand. He doesnāt even know what he stands to win.
You kiss his neck. He shudders.Ā
āWhy are you so scared of me?ā you ask.Ā
Scared? He is not scared. What an outright laughable concept. Neither of you are scared, but if one of you was, it should be you, but you arenāt, for some reason.
āWhat gives you that idea?ā he chuckles, but his voice is not as steady this time, and he can feel his smile slipping. (What is wrong with him? He doesnāt want to think about it. The answer is always āeverythingā.)
āYour hand is shaking.ā
It is, but that is not because he is afraid. Fear is a human response, borne from the desire to live. It is instinctual. It means kicking and screaming, it means clawing your way out of hell for the chance to see another day, it means fighting for the life you donāt want to end. He cannot die, you see. Death cannot occur twice. Just because his body reacts, that does not necessarily mean he can truly fear any longer.
(Then again, maybe his reaction does not come from the thought of his death.)
āIām not scared,ā he says, and his voice sounds a lot weaker than he had expected. You pull him closer, cradling his head against the crook of your neck. His blood is pulsing too quickly.
āIt would be okay if you were,ā you murmur. āI know you donāt know how to be loved. Thatās okay. Iāll teach you. You just have to let me.ā
Squash. Slice. Tear.
Maybe you are the monster. He can feel your claws prying his chest open; he can feel your teeth dig into his flesh; he can feel something that is not air fill his lungs. The biggest difference between you and him is that he devours, while you give. You painfully shove something back into the cavity meant to contain his soul, you pump blood back into his system, and you fill whatever gaps are left in him with something that is first cold but quickly warms.Ā
(He realises, belatedly, that something is pumping inside his chest again. But it canāt be a heart, can it? He lost that so long ago.)
āIāll kill you,ā he manages through gritted teeth, claws digging into your shirt. It is not a threat. It is not a warning. It is just the truth.
āYou think too much,ā you admonish him. Your tone is as gentle as your words are cutting. āI wish you would trust me more. Youāre so determined to ruin your own life, and I donāt like it.ā
āThatās just how I am. Deal with it or leave.ā
āIāll deal with it, then.ā
Like a werewolf called by the full moon; like a vampire to blood; like a siren to a sailor. He will destroy you. But you accept it.Ā
He has tried time and time again to push you away, but he is weak. So incorrigibly weak, and though your flaws are insurmountable, his are all-consuming. He is a monster in all the ways that matter. But you stubbornly will not leave despite that.Ā
(Maybe that makes him a little more willing to try to change his nature. Just a little. Just for you. If you will not leave anyways, maybe he could try to make his presence a little less torturous.)
āJustā¦ please stop ignoring me,ā you sigh, nuzzling into his hair. Tenderly, tenderly, tenderly, so tenderly it makes his skin crawl. Your claws are softly piercing into him and he is helpless, unable (unwilling) to fight back. āI can deal with everything else. I just hate it when you do that. I canāt keep going weeks without speaking to you. I know you have some kind ofā¦ weird ideas that Iād be better off without you, but thatās not true. I love you, and I love being around you. I canāt help you when you cut me off at every corner.ā
Cut, slice, slash.
Something in him breaks. Something he knows cannot be salvaged. Something he knows you would not want to salvage. Something he is not sure if he wants to salvage either, now that it is broken anyways.
He breathes a shaky breath, his fingers ā his fingers, not claws, not this time ā digging into your back. He buries his face into the crook of your neck, and he does not feel the urge to bite down. Though his eyes feel wet, it would not be enough water to drown you.Ā
He knows your line of logic is wrong. He knows the fact remains unchanged: he is a monster of a man. He will ruin you. But maybe your presence sparks enough electricity to keep his heart pumping, just for a little while, and maybe he can wait until things actually start going downhill before he lets you go. Maybe he can remember how to be a human for a bit, maybe he can pretend he is.Ā
āI justā¦ donāt want to do something I canāt take back,ā he whispers. āNot with you. Youāre theā¦ the only good thing I have left. I donāt know what Iād do if Iā¦ā
āThatās sweet, but Iām not as weak as you think I am,ā you reply. āIāve held out this long, havenāt I? Put more faith in me.ā
He smiles.
āYeah, I guess youāre right.ā
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My inbox is open, feel free to send in asks or requests, I'd love to ramble about things <3 Also reblogs are EXTREMELY appreciated the final push I needed to finish this was from a very kind individual who reposted and analysed my writing I've been riding that high ever since they did that ily bro
#[rawbin]#[aventurine]#[rawbin fanfic]#[by me]#aventurine x reader#Tried some sort of weird monster metaphor by bringing up werewolf vampire and siren imagery idk if that worked out the way I wanted but -#whatever part of the process is making weird decisions and learning what did and didn't work out#Not entirely happy with this but I wasn't with the previous part either so yolo I don't have the patience to scrap this and start over#Tried to make the dialogue sound like things real actual human being would say but idk if I succeeded#Especially when reader reassures him what person actually speaks so eloquently ?? not me that's for sure#And the part where Aventurine is like āš¢ i-i-i don't w-w-wanna hurt you pookiebear!!!ā he would not say that straight out#but whatever I'm tired and I can tell I will not be finding the motivation to work for this one more night#plsss continue sendinf requests guys it makes me happy#Currently working on qpps Aventurine (whoever sent that request I actually love you)#(reason it's taking so long is because I've written so much in the tumblr app and my phone keeps overheating so I need to take breaks HELP)#(I've learnt my lesson and will try to stick to writing in my notes app when I suspect I might write a lot <3)#Jesus these tags are an essay sorry I just CANNOT shut up I looove speaking I love it love it love it#aventurine honkai star rail#aventurine hsr#aventurine star rail#hsr aventurine#aventurine#aventurine fanfic#reader x aventurine#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail#hsr x you#hsr x reader#hsr#star rail
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