#he is just scared of Charlie he now knows how his brother in law felt like | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

wakandaforeverwrites · 2 years ago

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Learn Ya || Chapter 9

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8

Author Notes: SURPRISE SHAWTY. Shout out to everyone that lowkey bullied me into continuing this fic some three years later. I love y’all for that. I kept the same tag list as before so if you no longer wish to be tagged, just let me know.

Amaya felt like her whole world had come crashing down in a matter of seconds.

She’d had her life planned out from the time that she was a young girl, and now all of those plans had gone astray. She could understand that her mother’s job was having financial issues and there needed to be cut backs as far as employees went. What she couldn’t understand was why her mother needed to be included in that. She sort of knew that she was being selfish about her true reasoning for caring that her mother lost her job, but she couldn’t help it. Her entire world had just been flipped on its head.

She couldn’t afford school anymore. The financial aid she had been given didn’t cover the complete cost of her first year. Her mother was going to cover the difference so that Amaya didn’t have to worry about the financial strain of school and could solely focus on making sure she made the best grades that she could. She was even going to cut back on the hours she worked at the centre to give her all to her academics.

That wasn’t the case anymore.

She had to come up with the money in a very short amount of time and she had really only two options as far as she was concerned because deferring a year simply wasn’t going to work for her.

She could either work more hours at the centre to get the money to pay the difference or she could take out student loans. Honestly, neither of them were stellar options, but she was heavily leaning towards the student loans. It would give her the money she needed right in that moment and she could deal with the fall out to her credit score and paying it back later in life. All she wanted to do was go to law school. How she did it really didn’t matter to her anymore.

“Is everything alright, Amaya? You have been unusually quiet tonight?”

She looked up from the plate of food she had been toying around with the last few minutes, pushing around bits of mashed potatoes across the ceramic, and saw T’Challa looking at her. Concern was etched into his features, brows sitting low on his face and his full lips pulled down into a soft frown.

She really should have canceled their date but she hadn’t been able to bring herself to do that. It had been a few weeks since she had last seen him and she knew he was a busy man. Though, she supposed canceling would’ve been better than going and being in a sour mood the entire night.

“Yeah, everything is fine.” She did her best to put on the most convincing smile but the look that he gave her showed that it didn’t work in her favor.

“I do not appreciate being lied to.” The frown was still etched on his face but his voice was soft, almost as if he didn’t want to scare her.

Amaya pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and let out a small breath through her nose. She certainly hadn’t meant to lie to him but she wasn’t sure if they were at the stage where she could dump all of her issues onto him. Everything up until that point had been lighthearted and fun so it was hard to say if he truly even wanted to know. She allowed silence to settle between the two of them as she continued to push around food on her plate, lost in her thoughts. It might be good to talk to someone who could provide an outside prospect of things, and he might even have some sort of sage advice to give to her.

“No, really everything is fine,” she had every intention of leaving it at that but the way he lifted one brow let her know that it wasn’t going to fly a second time. “My mother lost her job and now I’m trying to figure out how to pay for law school.”

She hadn’t really said those words out loud. Other people might have said them to her, Charlie or her brother, and she might have thought them on more than one occasion, but the words had never once left her mouth. Not even when her mother had sat her down and told her the whole truth. Saying the words out loud would only make the reality of her situation settle in, making it that much harder for her to try and deny the truth. She had hoped that if she simply just remained positive then maybe things would work themselves out, but with each passing day, she could see that a positive attitude wasn’t going to work and that very same attitude diminished and made way for a more negative one.

When his hand moved across the table, she didn’t hesitate to slip her into his. Regardless of whatever mood she was in, her body sought out the physical comfort from him because there was something about his presence that had been nothing but soothing for her, even in the times he made her heart stutter in her chest.

“How much is your balance?”

“A lot.”

“How much is a lot?”

“$19,980. I gave them $20 so they would stop calling me for a few days but really I just think the lady felt bad for me when I started crying on the phone. Half of that needs to be paid by the end of next week.” Again, she had thought about her situation plenty of times but saying it out loud only made it that much more daunting for her.

“I will take care of it.” His tone was so final as he squeezed her hand.

“T’Challa, no. I can’t ask you to do that.” The very last thing she wanted him to think was that she had only told him in hopes that he would pay for it.

“It is a good thing you are not asking and I am offering.”

“I mean I get that but I’m still saying no.”

“It is also a good thing I am not seeking your permission on this.”

Amaya rolled her eyes and kissed her teeth. “Now is not the time to be playing that little game where you need to have control over everything. This is serious and it’s too much money for you to pay and I can’t pay you back,”

“You will not need to pay me back. Consider it an early graduation gift if that will help you feel better about accepting the money.”

“I don’t need you to do that. I can figure something out.” She made a face and could start to feel herself get defensive.

The logical part of her knew that he was only doing this out of the kindness of his heart and not because he thought she couldn’t do it on her own (which they both know that she couldn’t). But there was also some jaded part of her that felt like he was doing it because he expected something in return. Sex maybe.

Of course there had been indications that the two of them were sexually attracted to each other, anyone on the outside looking in could see that, but he hadn’t given her any reason to believe that was the one and only thing that he was after. It was yet another thing she had to remind herself that set him apart from the men she had dealt with in the past. Particularly Rod.

“Come here.” A frown had once again settled onto his face as she pulled her hand away from his.

“You can’t just distract me with whatever you’re going to try and do.”

“Amaya,” her name was a rough warning on his tongue that she felt right between her thighs. What was wrong with her that him being even a little stern with her was making her wet? “Come here. I won’t tell you again.”

She watched as he pushed his chair away from the table a little bit. Any other time she would’ve pushed the boundaries a little bit more, trying to see just how much she was able to get away with, but she didn’t have the energy. She mirrored his actions and stood up from her own chair, rounding the table to stand in front of him. She wasn’t standing long before she found herself being pulled down into his lap.

A shuddering breath left her lips when a large hand rested against the bit of thigh exposed by her dress. A distraction and damn if it wasn’t working.

“Why is it so hard for you to accept my help?” She could barely think with the way his thumb traced back and forth across her skin.

“Because I don’t want you thinking I told you so you would help me.”

“If you are going to be someone in my life then you should expect to be taken care of in all aspects of your life, Amaya.” She had to admit that he did have a way with words but she could tell that he wasn’t just saying them for show. He meant them.

“I don’t think I know how to let people do things like this for me.” Amaya prided herself on being an independent woman. Of course, her mother and her family were there if and when she needed to help but no one outside of that circle really did anything to take care of her.

“I can teach you.”

————-

The rest of the dinner had placed Amaya in much better spirits and a lot of that was due in part to T’Challa keeping her in his lap with an arm wrapped around her waist as he held her close. The two of them fell back into their usual back and forth banter with ease. It was nice to not have to worry about whether or not she was going to be able to attend school or not.

She had never been so grateful to be called into work on a random Tuesday morning. Without that, she would’ve never met him and she would currently be shit out luck, probably forced to drop out of school because Rod certainly didn’t have an odd $20,000 laying around to help her out.

She still hadn’t agreed to let him pay for her first year but she also wasn’t fighting him on it either. She would sleep on it for a few days, telling him she would give him an answer in a few days time. He had been reluctant but he agreed, albeit begrudgingly.

The night was coming to a close and she felt an almost loss at knowing that he would be leaving in the morning and hadn’t really given her a time frame on when he would be back.

Her key twisted in the lock of her front door but she didn’t open it. Instead, she cleared her throat and mustered up all of her courage, putting on her proverbial big girl panties as she turned to look at him. “Did you want to…I don’t know like come in or something?”

Even in trying to make it sound like no big deal, her voice cracked.

“I would love to but I do fly out early tomorrow morning.” She was happy that he sounded sad about the fact but she had no intention of letting up.

“I know I know. It’s just Charlie isn’t home and I really don’t wanna be home alone, Sir.” She rocked back and forth from one foot to the other, looking up at him with what she could only hope was a look of helplessness.

T’Challa made a soft sound like a hum as he hooked his finger underneath her chin. “You call me that and think I’m just supposed to give in to you whatever you want.”

“I do.”

“I could tell you no right now. Don’t forget that, Amaya.” Despite the half grin forming on his lips, he gripped her chin a little tighter.

“I know you could, but do you wanna know what I think?” His fingers left her chin in order for his hand to cup the side of her face. Her body wasted no time leaning into his touch.

“Enlighten me, beautiful.”

“I think you don’t want to say no. I think you want to come in as much as I want you to come in. You just wanna play hard to get.” She reached behind her and opened her front door.

“I’m playing hard to get?” He chuckled softly as his brows lifted.

“Mhmm,” she nodded. “You definitely are and you need to cut it out before it gets you in trouble.”

She took one step back and then another, finding that he was following her back into her apartment. The way kept his eyes on her as he pulled her keys from the door and kicked it closed before flipping the lock, had her chewing on the inside of her cheek. She found that she loved having his attention solely on her.

“You and your mouth.” His thumb ran across her bottom lip and it took every ounce of strength that she had to resist the urge to pull the digit into her mouth. “Always pushing your limits.”

“You like it or else you would’ve made it so I couldn’t sit down for a week by now.”

“The night is still young.”

Taking his hand from the side of her face, she wrapped her fingers around his wrist to guide him to her bedroom. The voice in the back of head was telling her that she needed to get herself under control. She hadn’t invited him up because she wanted to jump his bones. She really had invited him because she didn’t want to be alone for the night, and she wanted to spend what little time she did have left with him.

When she pushed open the door to her bedroom, she was grateful that she had cleaned up some before she left. Any other time, her room would have been in shambles with clothes and shoes thrown all over the place in her attempt to find something suitable to wear. Instead, it was just the small desk in the corner of her room that was a mess with books and papers haphazardly thrown across the top, and her bed that she had forgotten to make.

Her room was small and his large presence made it seem that much smaller.

“I’m gonna get changed but could you unzip my dress for me?” She could easily reach the zipper herself but that didn’t mean she couldn’t have a little fun. When she turned and pulled her braids over her shoulder, she felt his presence behind her.

T’Challa said nothing as one hand ghosted up her arm and the other wrapped around the small zipper and pulled it down slowly. Amaya swore her heart felt like it was about to explode out of her chest and it didn’t get any better when she felt his lips trail along the skin of her shoulder. She inhaled sharply. His fingers pushed down the thin straps of her dress and her hands instinctively came up to hold the dress in place before it hit the ground.

She talked a big game and had no problem teasing him but she wasn’t so sure that she wanted to drop her dress and stand in front of him in just a pair of panties just yet.

When his lips pressed the shell of her ear, her eyes fluttered and she let out a small sound despite her best efforts to remain calm. It had been far too long since someone had touched her, played with her body until her mind went fuzzy and she couldn’t think, and it showed.

“Go change before I forget that I would like to be a gentleman tonight.”

She wondered what might happen if she told him she didn’t want him to be a gentleman, but something was telling her that she wasn’t quite ready for that. T’Challa seemed like a man who knew exactly what he was doing with far more years of experience than she had. She didn’t want to write a check that her ass couldn’t cash.

“Right,” she nodded her head and stepped away from him.

She practically scurried out of the room with her pajamas in hand. She knew if she had stayed in her bedroom for one second longer, she would have easily given in to the x rated thoughts that had been swarming in her head. The magnetic pull that man had over her body was insane. Scary. Thrilling. And more than just a little erotic.

She had never wanted to fuck someone so badly in her life. It was to the point that if he asked, she would be hard pressed to say no, but she truly did what to take things slow with him. She wanted to be sure that they had something that went beyond just the very apparent physical connection and attraction.

And she didn’t want him to think she was a whore.

Amaya used her night time routine as a means to distract herself, probably taking far longer than she needed to, but she needed to give her body all the time that it needed to cool down. By the time she had gone through the steps, her body was still on edge but only just barely. She was sure she would be able to keep her hormones in check.

Or so she had thought before she stepped back into her bedroom to see T’Challa sitting up against her pillows with her civil procedures book in his hand. It would have been fine for her, nothing she wouldn’t have been able to handle if he hadn’t stripped down to his boxer briefs and nothing else. .

This man was going to be the death of her.

“You just made yourself right at home I see.” She gave him a pointed look before she shoved her clothes into her hamper. She just needed to distract and deflect so nothing got out of hand.

“Well, you can only leave a man to his own devices for so long before he starts to get bored.” The smirk he gave her when he looked up from the book had her grinning back at him like an idiot.

“I see that.” She rolled her eyes as she walked over to him and pulled the book from his hands. “I don’t think this is how you want to cure your boredom though.”

“Do you have any suggestions then?”

“I have a few, but you have to leave so early in the morning and I would hate to keep you up all night, y’know?” She pressed her lips together to keep from smiling as he laughed.

She dropped the book back off on her desk before she flopped down on her back onto her bed.

“Lay down before your mouth lands you into some trouble you can’t handle, Amaya.” He shook his head.

She had no doubt that she would find herself getting into some trouble at some point with him but tonight wasn’t going to be the night for that. Crawling into bed, she laid on her side with a hand curled underneath her chin so she could face him. He wasted no time in mirroring her actions minus the hand under his chin.

“Do you know when you might be able to come back?”

“Unfortunately, no I don’t. There are quite a few things back home that I will need to take care of before I can get away again.” His hand reached out and his thumb moved along her cheek.

She figured that he was a busy man but she’d had a sliver of hope that he would be back sooner rather than later. It was getting harder and harder each time to only have an afternoon or a few hours a night with him at a time before he disappeared for an extended period of times. Phone calls could only do so much.

She really did like having him around.

“Don’t look so sad,” she wasn’t aware that she had started to frown until he pointed it out. “I’ll still make sure to call you every day.”

“Don’t get me wrong, it is nice hearing from you every day but actually seeing you more often would be even better.” She shrugged her shoulders and toyed with the ring that hung from the chain around his neck. When she looked up there was something of a smug smile on his lips. “What?”

“If I didn’t know any better I would think you had a thing for me.”

“You’re alright I guess.” She rolled her eyes playfully.

“Oh I’m just alright? I guess I should go somewhere where I will be appreciated then.” He started to roll over to get out of bed before she caught his arm.

She pressed her body into his and buried her face into his chest, inhaling his scent gently. “Don’t go.”

His arms wrapped around her tightly, holding her close, as he pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head.

“I’m right here, baby girl.”

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#black panther smut #black panther fanfiction #black panther imagine #black panther fluff #black panther fic #tchalla fanfiction #tchalla fanfic #t'challa x oc #t'challa imagine #t'challa fanfiction #t'challa fanfic #t'challa smut #series: learn ya

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bisexualbumblebee-writes · 1 year ago

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The Insiders Chapter 31: Free

Word Count: 0.9k

February 10, 1966

Dally stepped down from the stand after finishing his testimony. It was an odd sight for the gang, seeing him in a button up and slacks - even if they were a bit messy. It had been a little over a week since Tuesday’s trial started. Naturally with any law, she had to go through a trial for what happened with Shawn Brown. It’d been a long week full of testimonies. They ranged from socs like Piper Brown, several other socs that were present the night of Sean’s murder, to even Charlie and Tuesday themselves. Darry, Sodapop, Two-Bit, Ruth and Willow also had to give testimonies, but since they weren’t present during the murder their testimonies didn’t really mean much.

Finally, today they only needed Dally’s testimony before the judge (hopefully) made a decision on the case. Tuesday sat straight up in her chair in the nicest dress she had, trying not to look as scared as she felt. Darry, who was the only one allowed to sit beside her, wrung his hands nervously. In the bench directly behind them sat Ruth, Charlie, Soda and Ponyboy while Two-Bit and Willow sat near the back. Once Dally was sitting back down the judge hummed thoughtfully and looked over the copies of testimonies and evidence.

“Now that all testimonies and evidence has been entered I will need a minute to deliberate,” she announced in a loud and firm tone so everyone could hear, early making Tuesday jump out of her seat. Darry rubbed her back soothingly.

“We’re okay,” he whispered. “It’s gonna be okay. ” The girl couldn’t figure out whether he was trying to convince her or himself, but she appreciated the effort anyway. After several minutes (which truly felt more like hours), the judge finally looked up.

“Will the defendant please rise?” Tuesday glanced at her older brother, who merely smiled warmly and squeezed her hand in encouragement. She returned the smile weakly before standing, keeping her grip on his hand as she faced the judge.

Everyone listened in silence as the judge went through a long speech about how a young man’s life had been taken too soon just two weeks ago. She continued by stating that the stabbing of Sean Brown was an act of self defense considering what he’d been doing mere seconds before his death before finally reaching her conclusion.

“Therefore, Tuesday Aurelie Curtis, you are acquitted of any and all charges held against you,” she announced as she looked over the paper in her hand. “And this court puts you in the custody of your older brother, Darrel along with your brothers Sodapop Patrick Curtis and Ponyboy Michael Curtis. This court is adjourned.”

The judge banged her gavel, signaling the end of the trial while Tuesday stood there in shock. Immediately Ruth, Soda and Ponyboy were on their feet, all beaming with excitement. Darry practically jumped up and pulled Tuesday into a hug, which she returned with all her might shortly before Soda and Ponyboy joined in the group hug.

Once the group pulled away from each other, Darry went to Ruth while Soda went to Charlie and Ponyboy went to talk to Two and Willow. That left Tuesday, whose eyes immediately found Dally’s. The boy had been watching the group hug, now standing rather than sitting, with a small smile. Her smile widened and she gestured him over to her, which he did while rolling his eyes playfully.

“It’s ‘cause I wore the slacks, huh?” He joked with a smirk, holding out his arms invitingly for her.

“Oh, totally,” she laughed tearfully before hugging him. His hold on her was similar to that of a warm blanket as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

“I knew you’d do it,” he muttered only loud enough for her to hear.

“You always believe in me,” she responded softly.

“Begrudgingly,” he teased, making her roll her eyes playfully.

“Oh you know you love me,” she giggled, looking up at him. Dally’s smirk morphed into a fond smile.

“Course I do.”

“C’mon guys, let’s get out of here,” Darry instructed the group, taking Ruth’s hand and beginning to lead her out.

“Thank god,” Dally huffed jokingly as everyone followed them. “I can’t stand bein’ this shirt.” Once the group was outside Darry wrapped his arm around Ruth’s shoulders and looked at the others.

“We oughta celebrate with a picnic,” he decided with a grin.

“A picnic?” Ruth repeated with a smile because his grin is infectious. “I think that sounds wonderful.”

“After we change out of these nice clothes?” Tuesday added hopefully. She was wearing too nice of a dress to get it dirty at a picnic.

“Obviously,” Darry retorted with a teasing grin. “Dally looks like he’s gonna just fall over and die if he has to wear a collared shirt for another ten minutes.

“I’m surprised he didn’t take it off as soon as he got outside,” Soda joked.

“Don’t tempt me,” the boy in question threatened with a playful smile, making everyone else laugh as they reached their cars. Darry, Ruth, Soda, Charlie and Ponyboy rode in Darry’s truck. Dally and Tuesday took Buck’s car (which Dally had borrowed for the day), and Two and Willow rode in his car. They all made a quick stop to change into more casual clothes, then headed for the duck pond in the park, all in high spirits.

#the outsider #the outsiders imagine #dally winston #dally winston imagine #dally winston x oc #sodapop curtis #sodapop imagine #sodapop x oc #darry curtis #darry curtis imagine #darry curtis x oc #two bit mathews #two bit imagine #two bit x oc

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thebadboyfanclub · 4 years ago

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Lady Of The House Pt. 2 (Henry x Reader)

Heyyyyyy, so I finally finished this part, please let me know if you want to see more of this. Enjoy!

Part one

After the delicious breakfast Henry and (y/n) had he told her that they must attend a charity event that his brother was throwing. She always enjoyed those types of outings with him, she liked the attention and how Henry would proudly show her off and twirl her around the dancefloor, Henry always made her feel wanted and appreciated. However with that type of short notice, she was left running around her wardrobe room with Jennette and Angelina on her side, trying to pick an outfit, it wasn't like she didn't have any, but she always wanted to be perfect, the Cavill family had accepted her but not without difficulties, at the end of the day they all saw her as this little shiny toy Henry would dispose at some point.

"What about this? It still has the tag on it"

Angelina spoke lightly holding up the extravagant green gown Henry had bought her one day, she had mentioned her favorite designer so the next day Henry sent her 8 different gowns that he liked.

Angelina was new to the roaster, Jennette (y/n) quickly came to the realization that a few of the maids and butlers were giving out information about (y/n) to Henry's mom, she was a wonderful lady when (y/n) was around because she saw her as just a girlfriend and not the wife, so they swiftly got replaced. (Y/n) approached Angelina and let her fingers trace the fabric as she turned to look at Jennette.

"Isn't the slit a bit too much for a family event?"

"I think it's finally time for you to make this statement... miss Cavill"

(Y/n) giggled at the name, Jennette liked calling her that as a small joke and a reminder that she is now the lady of this house. (Y/n) was always a big personality but this life made her feel small and uncertain. She bit her lip before she started nodding to herself, Angelina smiled in triumph due to feeling accomplished with finding the dress for (y/n).

"Angelina help miss (y/n) put the dress on, I'll be downstairs if you need me"

"Yes miss jennette"

As (y/n) started to take off her robe to slip on the right dress, jennette walked out of the master bedroom and towards the entrance of the house, that's where Mister Henry was waiting for his lady. Jennette was curious about the reason he had asked to see her privately to talk about (y/n).

she wasn't worried about it though, Jennette had a good feeling about this since everyone could clearly see how madly in love he was with her, he had brought other women home in the past yet they were never introduced to the staff, they had remained anonymous visitors. She slowly walked down the marble stairs while Mister Henry was standing in front of a mirror, fixing his tie.

"You asked to see me sir?"

"Yes Jennette"

His tone of voice was light as a feather, kind and melodic as he finally rearranged himself and took his eyes off his reflection and turned to Jennette who was patiently waiting close to him.

"How's (y/n) been doing?"

"She is finally getting comfortable, Angelina has been helping with making her feel in charge"

Henry slowly nodded as a ghost of a smile on his lips. He remembered how scared she was in the beginning, how she would stutter while talking to the staff or some days she wouldn't even leave the bed until he came home. He could recognize how much she has flourished and rose to the occasion. He was so thankful when (y/n) started to smile while talking to him about Jennette, she needed an ally and now Angelina was another soldier

"I'm going to ask her to marry me"

Jennette gasped in a happy demeanor and started to clap fastly with her fingers while her palms remained together. Henry was aware how close the two of them had grown to become, Lady Jennette has been around his family since he was a young adult, when he first started getting involved in the "family business".

however all his brothers had kids and a wife, (y/n) was the only woman he could see a future with, just the thought of her with a big round belly made him feel all warm and fuzzy, he felt alive next to her and her presence never left his mind, he had a reason to keep living and working. As soon as he had laid eyes on her that night he stayed at the hotel she was working at he just had to have her, it was almost compelling

"Of course you can't tell her"

"I would never dream of such a thing sir"

Before Henry could speak he heard the door of his bedroom open, along with giggles that probably came from Angelina and (y/n). Both of them waited for her to turn the corner and appear.

(Y/n) felt his eyes on her as soon as she stepped at the top of the stairs. Jennette was smiling at the sight of her while Henry remained silent. Angelina helped her lift up her dress ever so slightly so she can take the steps down without a problem. You could hear her heels click on the well polished floor. Ever since she met him the look he gave her every time he saw her was addictive, she felt like the most beautiful woman in the world when he gave her this intense look that scanned her body.

"If the slit is too much I can go change"

"You look stunning my love"

He reassured her and walked to her. His hands immediately found hers and her raised one to his lips to place a gentle kiss on her knuckles while never breaking eye contact. She smiled back and instinctively she filled the space between them so she could hug him, his cologne made her feel safe knowing that he was there was the most comforting idea.

After a few moments she pulled away but their hands remained intertwined. Every single time they had to attend a family event he could sense her anxiety, at any other gala she was right at home but when it came to his family she looked like a kid going through school exams.

"Don't be nervous love"

"I'm not nervous"

She quickly shot back in defense. She could tell that he wasn't convinced, yet he chose to let it go, acknowledging the fact that pushing her more would only do more damage than good. Her hair was down and styled to perfection, her make up was done to bring out her beauty even more, she looked like a true goddess coming to bless the mortals.

"Don't wait for us jennette"

"Yes sir. Have a good night"

The car ride was spent by (y/n) looking out the window while her one hand traced her necklace and the other held Henry's, he chose to silently support her. He could comprehend how scary his family could be for an outsider, of course they were nice when she was around but (y/n) was no fool, she noticed the quick side eyes and the few whispers when she turned her back, she only bit her lip and smiled for Henry's sake, as well as the fact that if she wanted to be in this family she had to outsmart them, she was aware that they acted like that because she was the girlfriend, as soon as Henry would propose nobody would dare to say anything, she would officially be a Cavill. It was a shallow reason but she just wanted to be recognized for what she was, a woman that all she did was fall in love.

As the driver opened the door Henry got out first and then he helped (y/n) get out, before she got the chance he slightly kneeled in front of her to fix the end of her dress that touched the floor. His gentle grace of his fingers from her calf that went over her thigh brought goosebumps all over her body.

"I love this dress on you"

"I think you will have to wait until we get back home to show me how much you do"

Henry's reply was to lean down and press a kiss on her naked left shoulder before offering his arm for her to take as they walked in the Mansion as a couple.

(Y/n) felt the awfully familiar tightness in her chest as they entered, people were mingling, the smell of cigars lingered in the air as you could see the smoke in the air, even though the staff had done it's best to open windows and keep the air fresh.

"(Y/n)!"

She heard a woman call her name at a rather enthusiastic tone. As she turned she saw it was Henry's sister in law Chiara. She was dressed in a black dress that was a bit more modest than hers, yet it complimented her delicate figure in such a way that made her look like the glamorous Hollywood stars back in the day. The brunette woman opened her arms and offered (y/n) a warm hug. (Y/n) hugged back, feeling grateful that the host was one of the people in this family that she actually got along with. Chiara had married into the family years ago, she was rather tall and very intimidating, she vividly remembered the story of how Charlie traveled back and forth from the UK to Austria just to get a date with her.

"You look exquisite"

(Y/n) complimented her, Chiara smiled as she gave an up and down look with a smirk on her painted lips.

"Same goes for you dear, the hawk is going to have a heart attack… love it"

Chiara and (y/n) had bonded over how tightly Henry's mother held the strings, Chiara was the first to pull (y/n) aside and warn her that she is like that with anyone however she is all bark and no bite. Many nights have been spent over the phone with Chiara giving advice to (y/n). They were so different yet they found comfort in one another.

"How are you Chiara?"

Henry joined in, he didn't care that Chiara forgot to greet him, quite the opposite he was pleased (y/n) was getting the attention she deserved. Chiara looked at him and in the meantime Charlie started to approach her from behind, (y/n) had to admit that even though she met Chiara while she was married she still felt like Chiara was a single woman, Charlie traveled a lot which Chiara had stated multiple times that it was the reason she was still married to him, she needed her space and craved time alone. So as one can assume that she wasn't really eager to have a baby either.

"I'm well, I'm surprised you guys made it. I thought you had to be in Scotland"

"(Y/n) is not fond of Scotland"

He simply responded. To be fair she thought it was a beautiful country but it was springtime and she wanted to go somewhere with a bit more sun. A waitress approached the two couples and offered champagne, Henry reached for two glasses and offered (y/n) one, Chiara and Charlie were already holding a glass.

"Here you go love"

"Thank you"

"Cheers, to another successful season"

Henry raised his glass while the others followed. As they clinked their glasses and all the group took a sip, the taste of the bubbly drink soothed (y/n)'s nerves, her shoulders started to relax and the tightness on her chest was little to none.

"Where's mom and dad?"

"Oh last time I saw them they were talking to our brother"

"We should go say hello"

"Alright, it was nice seeing you"

(Y/n) said before Chiara leaned in a bit to whisper in her ear "you got this doll".

(Y/n) giggled at her and Chiara just stepped back and gave her a playful wink. Henry's hand found the small of her back before gently guiding her away from the couple, the last glimpse she got off the couple was Chiara turning to say something to her husband as she flipped her long wavy hair back.

(Y/n)'s heart stomped so loud she started feeling the pressure on her ears, out of instinct she clenched her jaw and tried to mask her nervousness. Henry spotted his parents and walked to them, knowing well that (y/n) is already done with the situation and depending on how this goes they might have to leave immediately.

"Henry and (y/n), is so good to see you"

Henry's father, Colin, was the first to greet them with a kind smile on his face. Colin had always been nothing but kind to (y/n), which was surprising to her since she had stereotypically thought that the father would be the hardest one to crack. Colin hugged his son and then proceeded to take (y/n)'s hand and give a kiss on her hand.

"It's good to see you young lady"

"Thank you"

"How are you dear?"

His mother Marianne said before going in for a very forced hug, yet she was grateful they still had a civil type of communication especially around others.

"I'm well, how are you?"

"You've lost weight, I was hoping you would have gained some, oh you would look so cute with a little baby bump"

(Y/n) let out a nervous giggle, not knowing how to answer. They weren't even married, let alone have a baby, she wanted to have kids but she was still young and wanted to enjoy having henry for herself a little longer.

Henry's hand went from the small of her waist to wrapping around her as a way to bring her closer to him. He had heard this over and over again, the only difference was that to him they questioned if she was worthy to bring an heir to the family.

"Not yet mother, I still enjoy seeing her in these tight clothes"

"Henry we are still your parents. He is right Marianne, let them have some fun"

"I'm sure (y/n) can have fun but Henry you are not getting any younger"

(Y/n) was at the edge of just disassociate as her gaze started to focus on a vase behind Marianne. In any other case if this woman was a random stranger she would have popped off and started to insult her. The squeeze she received from Henry's hand pulled her out of her trace. She bit her lip as she tried to find the right thing to say, she wanted kids but the subject of babies was something they hadn't even discussed other than the cheeky comments during sex. The squeeze she received from Henry's hand was enought to bring her out of her trance and now the tightness on her chest was replaced by a fire of anger.

"You know last time you questioned my credibility as a potential wife, so this new situation of wanting me to get pregnant is at least a step"

"Honey I don't know what you are talking about"

"You do, we all do"

She hit back before downing the rest of her drink. Henry smiled in triumph, he was taken back by her boldness on one hand, on the other she held her own and showed the spark he loved to see.

"I think it's time for us to leave. I love you both"

Henry hugged both of his parents and his dad gave (y/n) another kiss on the hand, when she turned to Marianne (y/n) smiled and took her in for a big hug, making Marianne let out a small "oh".

"Water under the bridge… dear"

(Y/n) said at a lower tone before she pulled away and took her spot again next to Henry.

"Have a good night"

Henry said before taking (y/n) away from them. Henry's hand slowly slid from her waist to her bum, he didn't do anything he just let it rest on it. (Y/n) was smart enough to understand that this small change of movement meant that not only was he not mad she responded, he was turned on by her.

"You never seize to amaze me love. I'll call the chauffeur but we got 15 minutes before he arrives"

"Plenty of time to see what decor they have in the bathroom"

Taglist

@the-british-koala @little-smurf @twhstuckylover @angywritesstuff @angelcavill66

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blackandgoldandeverythingnice · 3 years ago

Text

among the fields of gold - c. mcavoy

Pairing: Charlie McAvoy x female!OC

Summary: A little sneak peek into the future of charlie and nellie from i’m so glad to know as they attend the 2026 Olympics

Word Count: 4,682

A/N: Just the most self-indulgent little fluff I could come up with because I love writing them.

Warnings: none! the smallest hint of adult content but that’s about it.

“This is so fucking cool – did you ever actually tell me how cool it was to be at the Olympics?” Charlie was bouncing along the streets of Milan and swinging Eleanora’s hand as they went, a couple of other Team USA players behind them as they used the off day to do the touristy things they hadn’t yet been able to do during the first round of games.

“You’ve done plenty of World’s before, it’s almost the same.”

“It absolutely is not.” He argued back, glancing down and smirking at the little scowl on her face. He ignored the groans of a couple from the guys at the fact they were about to start bickering. It wasn’t their fault; he didn’t invite the idiots to come with them.

“You’re just excited because you’re staying in the Village and there are a bunch of girls there too – you don’t get that at World’s.”

“Yeah, I’m there for the girls.” He rolled his eyes and squeezed her hand before leaning over to kiss the top of her head.

The team was housed on their own floor in the dedicated USA building and it was like being back on a road trip in Peewees. They’d cruised through the round-robin, winning every game in their group and were heading into the elimination games. A lot of the guys had played together for years through development camps and national teams and they felt good about their chances.

They’d been wandering the streets of Milan, seeing as much of the sites as they could since all they’d seen were the inside of rinks. While Charlie had wanted to spend it just with Eleanora, some of the guys had caught him in the lobby with her on their way back from breakfast and insisted on joining them. She had pretty much become their team mascot: at every game, made a new sign for each and chatted with all the families happily. It made something in him burst in pride at the sight of her fitting so seamlessly into his life now. It hadn’t been an easy road to get there.

“Can you two not?” one of the Hughes brothers interrupted.

“Yeah, let’s stop this before it really gets rolling.” Matthew Tkachuk cut in, sweeping past Charlie with a smirk as he hit his shoulder and made his way across the square towards the Duomo. A few of the other guys sped passed them, running around the square and changing pigeons.

“And for a former Olympian, could you walk any slower?” Auston Matthews teased as he came right up close behind them.

Annoyed, Charlie shoved his teammate away just as Eleanora pinched his side. “I’m sorry, put some respect on the only gold medalist in this little crew right now. Also, I’m six months pregnant, dick head – you try carrying a bowling ball around your middle on these cobblestone ass streets.”

“Technically, a McAvoy has a gold medal – shouldn’t have changed your last name, babe.” Auston grinned, wrapping an arm around her shoulders but making sure to gently guide her as they walked around the various tourists and other athletes who had done the same thing they did.

“Can you get the fuck away from my wife?” Charlie groaned, checking Auston away so he could pull Eleanora into his side.

The rest of the guys walked ahead, leaving the two of them alone. Charlie smiled down at the way Eleanora was basking in the bright, cold air, her cheeks flushed and nose a little pink. There was a visible glow around her. He’d always thought it was bullshit when they said pregnant woman glowed but since the second she’d taken the test, there was a light happy aura around her. Walking with her tucked into him like she was slowed them down but Charlie liked making sure Eleanora was okay, to the point that she might kill him at some point if he asked her again how she was feeling.

“How are you – ”

“Don’t you dare ask how I feel right now, Charlie McAvoy.”

He pouted down at her. “It’s a valid question, they keep you scheduled so late for some of the media shit.”

“It’s called my job, babe.” She hip checked him gently. She’d stayed involved in the figure skating community and this year they’d invited her to provide commentary for the ladies’ singles. Turns out she was incredibly personable in front of the cameras and enjoyed talking to the young skaters. “I’m just happy none of your games conflict with the skating. I don’t think they’d love me ‘calling out sick’ only to have me show up on TV on the glass yelling at you to play better.”

“Excuse you, I have the most minutes played and highest rating.”

“Yes, baby – you’re very highly rated.” She snuggled into his side, and he laughed when she slid her hand into his back pocket and squeezed his ass.

The pair of them walked slowly around the square, laughing at the guys as they ran around. A few of Team Canada showed up along with a few of the Czech players. Since most of the teams were made up of NHLers, all the teams were friendly off-ice and trying to control them was like corralling kids at their first away tournament. A few fans stopped them as they went but most of them were interested in getting pictures with Eleanora rather than any of the guys, something the team loved to tease Charlie about. Joke was on them, he couldn’t be more proud to watch the way people adored her.

“How’s my boy doing?” he changed tactics as a group of young girls walked away after spending five minutes taking pictures with her and asking what it was like to win gold.

“I think he wants pizza and pasta.”

“Pizza and pasta? Not or?”

“You’re really gonna ask how I feel then judge your pregnant wife for wanting all the food?” the glare she shot him was enough to have him throwing his hands up in defense.

He leaned down to kiss her but she dodged him. “No way, bud – find me food then you can kiss me.”

“In my defense, I asked what my son wants to eat – you’re incidental to me checking up on him.”

“Do you want to die? Is that your plan? You want Team USA hockey to lose the gold because their captain was murdered by his pregnant wife?”

“Why’s Goldie threatening your life?” Jake popped up behind them, scaring the shit out of Charlie while Eleanora had seen him coming.

“He’s judging how much I want to eat.”

“Well, come on my fellow sewer rat – if Chuckie won’t love you right, I will.”

Jake offered her his hand and she took it, tossing a teasing smile behind her as the two of them started towards one of the side streets to find a suitable restaurant leaving Charlie to scurry after them.

--- ---

Eleanora chewed distractedly on her cuticle, staring at the clean sheet of ice waiting for the guys to step on for warmups. As she had for every single game, she was standing on the glass at the corner where her and his family had sat for the entirety of the tournament. The jersey of Charlie’s she had on barely fit over her belly and the maternity leggings made her feel like a sausage. Bouncing on the balls of her feet anxiously, she was as nervous as she’d been for her own gold medal skate.

“How’re you feeling?” a voice interrupted her nervous thoughts and she glanced over to see her father-in-law sliding into the seat next to her. After the first win, they’d sat in the same order they’d been in for every other game that followed. While Charlie wasn’t overly superstitious, Eleanora was and there’d been half a dozen little rituals she’d come up with for this Olympics.

“Jesus, your son ask you to ask me that?” she teased back at Charlie Sr. She rubbed her belly slightly and tried not to wince at the pain in her back. “Pretty sure this asshole is sitting right on my sciatic nerve.”

“Can you not call my first grandson an asshole?” Charlie’s mom appeared on her other side, looping her arm through hers. “But seriously, you alright?”

“No pain I haven’t dealt with before but this kid is already putting me through the wringer. I have to do this for 3 more months?”

Mrs. McAvoy frowned sympathetically and rubbed her arm softly. “Sorry, Ellie but yes. It’ll be worth it though.”

Just as she spoke, the guys stepped out and Eleanora zeroed in on Charlie leading the way, pushing the pucks off the edge of the bench and onto the ice.

“I can’t believe this – my son is going to be an Olympic medalist no matter what.” His mom said, sniffling slightly as she watched them start skating.

“We want gold, Jen – right, kid?” Senior nudged her in the side.

Eleanora smiled slightly. “I just want him to do the best he can.”

“Bullshit, you’re more competitive than he is. I saw you cursing him out last game for - and I quote - ‘a bullshit lazy turnover’.” Holly added as she joined the conversation, pushing her mom out of the seat next to Eleanora so she could keep the right lineup.

They all laughed while she just shrugged. “No one plays for second place...although I do kinda like being the only gold medalist. It’s how I get him to do things for me when I think I deserve them.”

The noise in the arena started to swell as the Canadians took the ice and Eleanora felt the familiar buzz and thrill of the pressure building. She hadn’t been able to see Charlie this morning, only getting a quick FaceTime as she’d been wrapping up interviews with some of the figure skaters who were getting ready for their final performance the following day.

“How was he this morning?”

Kayla shrugged. “Quiet. He missed you.”

She frowned, cursing herself for not having been there. It was their routine for the last few years, she was always the last person to see him before he went into the locker room for a big game. It felt like a bad omen that she’d missed giving him a last kiss before the biggest game of his career.

But just then Charlie skated by them for the first time, helmet off and his hair flowing behind him. He tapped the glass as he went by but kept skating in loops. After a couple laps and drills, he returned to the corner and stopped in front of her.

She couldn’t hear him over the crowd but he was pointing at her and gesturing halfway across the rink to where there was an opening in the boards. She followed where he was pointing to see one of the arena staff standing by the entrance to the locker rooms and she got the hint, squeezing through the seats as fast she could. The belly didn’t exactly help her move quickly or the people that kept trying to stop her.

He was already waiting for her by the time she reached the space, his gloves off and resting on the side. He reached out for her and she stepped eagerly towards him. On skates he was so much taller than her that she had to stand on tip toe just to wrap her arms around his neck. She was cognizant of the eyes of those in the area on them and she was sure there were cameras zooming in too.

“I couldn’t play the biggest game of my life without getting my good luck kiss.”

The stares and camera clicks faded away as she stared up at him. Knowing how the media was obsessed with “Their Story”, this was bound to be everywhere in no time. It’s why they liked their moment to be private before a game but right now, Eleanora couldn’t quite care because all she wanted was Charlie to win.

Gently, he brushed her stomach and just as he did, the baby gave a hard kick. Charlie grinned, leaning down to press his lips firmly to hers and she smiled into the kiss. “I think someone’s telling you he wants you to win.”

“I plan on winning it for his momma, gotta impress her.” He smirked, his face still inches from hers.

“I love you, baby – so fucking much.” She pressed one final kiss to his lips. “I’m not gonna tell you just making it to the gold medal game is an achievement – even though it is. You know what you need to do. Go fucking win it.”

“I shoulda had you do the pump-up speech for the boys.” He kissed her nose quickly before pulling back and grabbing his gloves to return to warmups. “I love you, babe – see you on the ice after.”

She watched him skate away, her palm flat against her belly and she felt another strong kick. Rubbing her stomach she looked down at the USA stretched across her front, smiling softly as she whispered to herself.

“Don’t worry, little man – daddy’s gonna win it for us.”

--- ---

The second period started with the game tied at two. Charlie had an assist and had already spent almost twelve minutes on the ice. Despite most of the off-ice friendships and even teammates who were playing against each other it was getting chippy. They all clearly wanted it and weren’t holding back. Tkachuk had managed to draw three penalties while only going to the box once himself.

Eleanora felt like she was going to lose her voice the amount she’d been screaming throughout the game. It seemed like part of Team Canada’s game strategy was to go after Charlie as much as possible. They’d been hitting him hard and there’d been one particularly nasty penalty he drew when Chabot leveled him with a late hit. Charlie had been slow to get up from that one but within the first thirty seconds of the powerplay, he’d put a pass right on Auston’s tape for the tying goal.

There had always been something both exhilarating and nerve-wracking about watching Charlie play. When he was on the ice, she only watched him, not even noticing where the puck was or what action was happening unless he was involved.

It was partially how she was able to react a second before the rest of the rink when she saw Chabot coming from behind him, hitting him hard and sending Charlie headfirst into the boards. He was splayed out flat on the ice while his teammates immediately rushed to his defense, Auston and Tkachuk jumping Chabot before Auston was pulled away by Dougie Hamilton. Eleanora felt like climbing over the glass to get to him and Kayla was gripping her arm tightly.

“Get up. Get up. Get up, Junior.” His dad was begging while Eleanora just kept staring in horror.

After what felt like hours but was probably only a minute, he slowly tucked his legs up under him and managed to get to a kneeling position just as the team doctor reached him. He was clearly still dazed, holding one hand on his helmet as he slowly got up. Gaudreau had come over and was kneeling next to him, offering to help him up but Charlie waved him off.

The arena applauded as he stood up, but Eleanora couldn’t feel the relief everyone else did as she watched them lead Charlie to the locker room.

“He’s okay. He got up on his own. They just have to check him out for protocol. He’s okay.” Kayla was chanting and all Eleanora wanted to do was rush to the locker room. Instead of watching the rest of the game, she stared at the locker room entrance, praying Charlie would return to the bench.

They ended the second period down by one and only during the intermission did she let herself pull her phone out to find the replay of the hit. They all huddled around together watching intently, only slightly reassured that Charlie had gotten up on his own and made his way quickly down the tunnel without support. It felt like time was moving in slow motion as the ice was cleaned. Finally, the lights dimmed again and the players started back out on the ice.

It felt like a weight was lifted when she saw Charlie hop out last, doing quick laps to warm back up as he shook his legs out. As he went by them, he tapped the glass and Eleanora felt like she was going to cry just from the quick wink he gave her.

“Thank god.” His mom sighed a breath and Eleanora felt lightheaded as she rubbed her stomach aimlessly. The baby had been active all game, bouncing around and kicking more than usual. It’s like he could sense what was happening around them.

The third period wasn’t any less stressful, Team Canada was clearly content to play defense while Team USA threw everything at them but couldn’t seem to find the back of the net. But then in the last 27 seconds of the game, Charlie caught a pass from Quinn Hughes and buried it in the top corner of the net to tie the game. The roar of the arena felt deafening as they all jumped up and down, screaming happily while the players mobbed their captain. The crowd clearly expected overtime, neither team wanting to give one up in the remaining seconds of the game.

But then Conor McDavid of all people misplayed the puck in the neutral zone and it landed on Jack Eichel’s stick who shot down the ice on a breakaway with only 7 seconds to go, shifting to his backhand as he slid the puck between the goalie’s legs.

If it was possible, the roof would’ve blown off the top of the arena. Team USA hadn’t won since the 1980 Miracle on Ice game and the place was shaking with excitement. USA gear and equipment was strewn across the ice like confetti while Team Canada stared on in disbelief, some kneeling together watching while others had already started to make their way towards the locker room.

People were hugging her tightly and screaming in her ear. Eleanora wasn’t even sure they were all people she knew. Charlie Sr. pulled her away from whoever was holding her and into a tight hug while the rest of the family crowded around jumping as they celebrated. She didn’t even realize she was crying until she tried to spot Charlie on the ice but her vision was blurry.

Sobbing into one hand, the other pressed tight against her stomach she felt another strong kick which only made her sob harder. It was better than her own win because she hadn’t had any true family to celebrate with besides her coaches who had become replacement parents to her. This was entirely different and felt like they’d all won it.

The celebrations continued on the ice as the McAvoys all made their way towards the same opening Eleanora had talked to Charlie before the game start. Other wives and families were already there, pulling each other into hugs, most of the moms crying happily while a few of the dads tried to fight their own tears except for Jim Hughes who was openly crying as he held his wife tightly to him.

Standing on the glass so she could watch, Eleanora scanned the sea of blue jerseys to try to find Charlie, biting her lip to try to stop crying. She was still contemplating scaling the glass but knew the guys deserved to celebrate with their team first.

Finally, her impatience grew and Eleanora, just popped the door open and started to make her way onto the ice. Once the dam broke, the rest of the families followed, ignoring the staff asking for them to stay off the ice until they had carpets laid down.

It was decidedly difficult to maneuver on the ice in sneakers and a pregnant belly but she moved as quickly and carefully as she could towards her target. Their eyes locked and Charlie broke away from the guys to get to her. When he reached her, he went right for her waist, dragging her up and off the ice as he twirled her around as she held tightly to him.

Neither of them spoke at first as Eleanora pressed kisses all over his face as he laughed until he could kiss her back. It was awkward to be held up so Charlie carefully set her down on the ice, one hand tucking protectively against her back so she wouldn’t slip and the other pressed gently on her belly as he leaned down for the sweetest kiss they’d ever shared.

“I told you I’d win it for you.” He whispered, pressing his forehead against hers.

“Not before scaring the shit out of me first.” She shot back but squeezed his waist tightly, her face landing in the sweaty material. “I’m so fucking proud of you, Teddy.”

She stared up at him, and despite the fact that he had just won the biggest game of his life, he was staring at her like they were the only two people in the world.

“This is almost as good as our wedding night.”

She gave a watery chuckle in return. “Just the wedding night not the wedding itself?”

“Eh, that was okay too.” He teased just as the rest of his family joined them. Reluctantly, she released him so he could hug his family, stepping back to give them a moment.

A few of the guys paused to hug her as they went by but mostly she just stood there watching Charlie beaming at everyone around him. The camera crews were starting to show up as the staff worked to get the carpets out and set up the podiums. Eleanora knew they wouldn’t get a private moment together for hours and she tried to melt into the background but Charlie was having none of that, snagging her hand and dragging her towards him as they started to interview him.

From her position under his arm, she stared up at him as he spoke, beaming proudly as he talked about the win and how special it was for them. She was so focused on him she didn’t realized they’d asked her a question.

“Nellie.” Charlie whispered, nudging her with a nose to the top of her head and she glanced at the reporter who was beaming at her.

“I was just asking how this compares to your own gold medal win just four years ago?” they repeated the question.

Eleanora grinned and squeezed his side tighter. “There’s no comparison.” She started, enjoying some of the frowns that followed before continuing. “What Charlie and the boys did was so beyond historic and I’m so proud to have been able to watch it happen. This team worked so hard and never gave up. I’m just thrilled I was able to share in it. Although I’m pretty pissed that I can’t win arguments anymore by saying ‘well I have a gold medal so you have to do what I say’.”

Everyone laughed in response, Charlie squeezing her side lightly.

“I’m sure you guys haven’t seen yet but the video of you two right before the game has become quite popular.” Eleanora flushed slightly as they continued. “Charlie – did you get any last minute advice?”

She pinched his side, hoping he’d lie but the smirk on his face already told her differently. “She pretty much told me that just getting to the medal game wasn’t enough and that I knew what to do. Pretty sure the exact words were ‘now go fucking win it’ and honestly, I can’t really say no to my wife so I did.”

--- ---

It was nearly three hours later by the time Eleanora and Charlie were walking into her hotel room and shutting the door so they were finally alone. They were planning on changing then meeting up with everyone to celebrate. Most of the guys’ flights weren’t for another day or two so they planned to enjoy what little remained of their Olympic break before they’d have to return to their teams for the rest of the season.

Charlie face planted onto the king-size bed. “Fuck, you’ve been sleeping on this for two weeks while I’ve been on the worst twin mattress in the world?”

Eleanora giggled, pulling her jersey off leaving on her loose t-shirt, she slipped out of her sneakers and kicked them towards the door so she could sit and join him on the bed. Despite how happy she was, she was exhausted and the pain in her back went from dull to stabbing on a dime. It took a little effort for her to climb up onto the bed and get comfy as she curled up on her side.

Charlie inched up so his nose was brushing against her swollen belly. Her hand immediately fell to his hair, running her fingers through gently and scratching his scalp. He brought his arm up so he was hugging her middle and pressed his lips against her.

“Hi, Tripp.” He whispered causing Eleanora to tug his hair gently.

“Baby, no. Even if he ends up Charlie the third, we are not calling him Tripp.”

Charlie ignored her. “Ignore mommy, I’ll make sure you get a cool nickname.”

She rolled her eyes but he kept talking. “I don’t know if you heard all that noise but now you have two parents with gold medals. We’re pretty big deals.”

“Kid was bouncing all over the place for most of the game before settling directly on my sciatic nerve so I couldn’t get comfortable.”

“Be nice to mommy, sweet boy.” He mumbled and pressed a kiss to her stomach before turning up so he could stare at her. “I think I won because of you.”

“You won because you’re an amazing hockey player and leader. You did this. Next up you can win us a Cup.” She smiled softly, stroking his hair as he crawled up so their faces were level. They lay there quietly together, staring at each other and enjoying the peace. They’d both turned their phones off, telling his family they’d see them at the restaurant that USA hockey had reserved for them. For now, they just wanted to be alone.

Carefully, Eleanora brushed Charlie’s hair off his forehead. “Your head okay? I might kill that Canadian fuck.”

Charlie laughed but cringed slightly. His head hurt more than he let on but he passed concussion protocol and had a few days off before he’d have to be back on the ice for a game.

“Are you okay? I know when you’re in pain, Nellie.”

She winced despite trying to smile as he tucked his hand under her top to lay on her bare skin, soothingly running his thumb along belly.

“Just pregnancy, or so I’m told. I need to figure out how to get him off this nerve or I’m gonna spend the flight pacing the aisles because I won’t be able to sit.”

Charlie frowned. “I hate seeing you in pain. And I’m worried you won’t want the five that I want if this one is such a pain in the ass.”

She snorted, inching forward to kiss him softly. “Let’s get through meeting this little man first then we’ll talk more, kay?”

“You’re the love of my fucking life, you know that?” he gripped her neck gently.

Smiling, she leaned forward to steal another kiss. “Lucky for you, it’s mutual. Now…I bet we could find a comfy position for you to fuck me in before we have to go to the restaurant.”

A slow smirk spread across Charlie’s face as he rolled her carefully onto her back so he could lean over her.

“I can definitely do that.”

#charlie mcavoy #nhl writing #nhl fic #nhl imagines #charlie mcavoy fic #boston bruins #me writing hockey fics #hockey fic #my writing #hockey imagines #hockey blurbs #annnnd we're back #because i'm just gonna keep writing these two #because it's fun for me #I hope you like it!#let me know if you have requests or feedback

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groovyzombiellama · 4 years ago

Text

You Look Perfect 4

Title: You Look Perfect 4

Requested? No.

Plot: You get married to the love of your life, with all the people you love present, finally feeling happy again. You’re a fucking Teller now.

Word count: 1232

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

---***---

You were once again staring at your reflection in the mirror, but this time you were more than excited to be doing this. You made sure Jax didn't see you before you left to walk the isle and you had one of your cousins make sure that the traditional wedding march would be playing as you walk down. You didn't expect Jax to prepare a huge ceremony when he was ready to propose to you. You weren't expecting a room filled with flowers or a cute scavenger hunt by clues towards the ring. Because you knew that wasn't Jax, it wasn't the kind of person he is. Sure, he has romantic moments, but you didn't even need an over the top proposal. You were happy with just getting married to the man you love. It did take you by surprise a bit that he actually wants to get married in the place where you were supposed to be marrying another man, but you figured it was his way of triumphing over your almost husband, managing to marry you in the same place he failed. You felt your hand shaking, as your nerves kicked in. You were more than sure that you were gonna marry Jax and that he was the only man for you, and the jitters you were feeling was overwhelming excitement to finally become Mrs Teller.

Saying your name combined with Jax’s last name over and over in your head made you smile wider than you ever have, and the only thing that brought you down to earth was Gemma and your mother entering the room whenre you were, to make sure you were ready, and to help you with anything you needed. Gemma once again apologised to you, and you once again assured her that she didn’t have to apologise, because you understood how she felt and that you would feel the same for your children. If tomorrow Thomas, or Abel, or one of the children you get pregnant with in the future with Jax was in the same situation, you would have felt exactly the same, and even if the way she worded things did hurt you a bit, you were okay. Gemma never really was the one for saying sorry, so to hear her say it to you, not once but twice, signaled to you that she must really like you. You had to be the strongerst you’ve ever been not to start crying and ruin your makeup when your mother gave you a box with a hair clip that she wore when she got married to your father, and wanted you to wear it on your wedding day.

Even if they would be happy tears, today was a day for smiles and laughter, because you were gonna marry the love of your life. Soon your dad knocked on the door of the room, and informed you it was time. You took a deep breath, hugging your mother and your soon to be mother-in-law, and you were all out the door, the two women taking their places in the front rows of the venue. Some of the people that your almost husband invited had left the venue, seemingly only there because he invited them or payed them to be there, but you were pleasently surprised to see that some of them actually stayed, like his sister, who wanted to be back on good terms with you, and knew the whole truth from the beginning and even she didn’t agree with you marrying her brother if you didn’t love him and knowing him as well as she does, she knew he wasn’t being a great person to you.

Hearing the music playing, Jax smirked. Even though you were fully on board with the whole biker life, and never yearned for cliché things like happily ever afters, you had those moments where the part of you that was a helpless romantic popped out and you wanted to experience a kiss in the rain or having traditional wedding music play as you walked down the aisle, even though he was wearing jeans, a t-shirt and his kutte. But he knew you accepted him just the way he was and there was no doubt in his mind that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. As the door of the venue opened, Jax looked up, and sucked in a sharp breath when he saw you. You were in a beautiful gown, sure, your ex fiancé was the one to buy it for you, but it was one of the reasons why Jax felt his ego being fed. He was gonna be the one to marry you in the venue where the other guy could not, he was the one to marry you in the dress the other guy could not.

He wanted to see you look like an angel, but in the end, it was Jax who was seeing you like this, and he was damn proud that out of all the men in the world, you chose him. You chose him to be yours and to be his. To be his wife and the mother of his children. The smile on your face as you looked at him was your most beautiful makeup to him and he couldn’t help but mirror it. As you reached him and your father hugged both of you, kissing your forehead, he moved to stand next to your mother as Jax took your hands in his, whispering how beautiful you looked, making your cheeks flush. Hearing Jax say “I do“ and then saying it yourslef felt magical. It felt like you were on cloud nine and you didn’t want to come down. Sure you knew that life was gonna throw a lot of things at you and you will never truly be away from danger, but you knew that you had each other and that you were gonna do your best to protect Jax and your babies as much as him.

“I’m a fucking Teller everyone! This is the happiest day of my life!“

You yelled out when the priest pronounced you husband and wife, making everyone in the venue laugh, followed by Jax grabbing your face in his hands gently, “he may now kiss his bride“, that sentence was music to his ears. Feeling his soft lips on yours had you melting into him and you never wanted it to end. He took off his kutte and placed it on your shoulders. You exchanged “I love you’s“ and one more kiss before gathering all of the guests and heading over to the clubhouse for a party to celebrate your wedding. You were ready to start your life with Jax, and not even the revenge that your almost husband thinks he can plan was gonna scare you away from this life, you were gonna fight against Jax’s side until the day you die. You were snuggled with your back against his chest, sitting in his lap, his strong arms around you, watching all the people you loved dance and have fun celebrating your marriage. You suddenly felt Jax kissing your neck, in just the right spots he knows would cause you to moan, and you knew what he wanted, so the two of you ended up sneaking off to his room, making love for the first time as husband and wife.

---***---

God I love this man!!! <3 Charlie Hunnam will forever be my biggest crush <3

Finally I have part 4 out, after so long, I hope you like it, I just wanted to get this out, and one more fic that was roaming in my head for a while now before I go back to my inbox and requests :)

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percydarling · 3 years ago

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After Percy apparates the Weasley family stand there trying to process the new information.

Percy had a wife who was a pregnant and they're both dead.

George feels like such an arse for blaming Percy. He doesn't know how to react, he doesn't know what to do or say or anything so he just stands there trying to think of something.

He's been so selfish, thinking only about himself not caring about others feelings and now he had a what, a nephew? No he doesn't because he's dead.

Dead.

He hates that word, he hates everything associated with that word. He hates it, hates it, hates it.

George tries to take a deep breath and closes his eyes, he cannot deal with his family right now so he does a Percy and disappears in his(and Fred's) room.

Molly needs to sit down, she really needs to sit down. Her head is throbbing and her heart aching for the dead. She remembers Penelope Clearwater. How can she not?

The 16 yr old Percy had spoken so fondly of his girlfriend then about how he thinks he's in love with her and so worried about letting her down. And now considering the fact that she's now his wife, Molly understands how much he had cherished her.

To think that that sweet girl is now dead doesnt sit right with Molly. It doesn't seem fair.

Percy's son is dead. Her grandson is dead.

Molly lost her son, but she has people around her to help her through the grief but Percy? Percy had noone to help him and that makes her heart ache.

Molly thinks about the grandson she could have had. She thinks about how he would have had Percy's features.

Molly weeps for her daughter-in-law, for her first grandson, but more importantly she weeps for Percy who had to go through all that alone.

Arthur can't comprehend the information. He can't picture it. He doesn't know who Penelope Clearwater, he wish he did. She sounds like a lovely girl.

Sounded, he corrects himself.

Arthur wonders if Penelope was still alive, would Percy and him still be separated, still be fighting? He wonders whether Percy would have come to him for advice on being a father. Arthur wonders about the what ifs but he also knows he has to focus on the now.

He's lost a son, so has Percy. And maybe they can repair their relationship and get over their grief together.

Arthur doesn't cry, he has to be strong for his family but when Percy tells him he was going to name him Lance as a nod to Lancelot, he locks himself in the bathroom and cries softly for the grandson he never had.

Bill is worried, not for Percy but for Fleur and that sounds so selfish but he can't help think about his child. He's pacing around the house, his scars itching and his mind running.

He was supposed to be the elder brother, the one who takes care of them and Percy having to go through that alone, it's a torture. Bill hates himself. He should have done something, said something but nothing. He did nothing.

He's still thinking about it when he feels her hand on his and Fleur just gives him this reassuring smile which relaxes him immediately.

Fleur won't be like Percy's wife. She won't die.

Fleur holds her husband's hand and thinks about her brother-in-law, the one who is different drom others. In some way she feels that they have a bond of being outsiders.

She thinks about the boy she met at the tournament, the look of fear same as hers when she couldn't save Gabrielle. The way he waded into the water towards his brother, all dignity forgotten.

Fleur remembers the boy who was scared for his brother. In a way she understands why Percy left. The Weasley family might look perfect from the outside but she was mistreated as well by her mother-in-law, something that she hasn't yet apologised for.

Losing a child is the worst thing imaginable. Fleur doesn't have a child, but she does have a little sister, who she cared for like a mother, so she understands.

Fleur looks at her stomach thinking about her child, she wishes that it doesn't end up as Percy's. She wishes desperately that she lives and so does she.

Charlie sits on the grass outside and wonders. He never really understood love. Oh sure he understood that his parents and siblings and friends loved him and he loved them back too,but romance? Not his department. He'd rather be with his dragons.

But Charlie does know that mother dragons get extremely depressed when their young die at an early age. It is absolutely awful, they wail and refuse to eat and would rather die with their young than live. Even months later you would see them with their dead young.

And if Percy had managed to go through that absolute hell and not drink himself to a coma, Charlie was proud of him. He really was. On the other hand he was aware that his nephew was dead.

Charlie sits next to Bill and crys softly on his shoulder. Bill's hand on his hair the only comfort.

Ron does what he does best, he tells Harry and Hermione about it because they're his family too and he needs to know how to react.

Hermione is devastated, she knew Penelope at Hogwarts and hearing about her death is a shock. Hermione leaves to be alone and neither Ron nor Harry object. They both understand. Ron felt the same when he heard that Lavendar died.

Harry asks Ron,"Where's Percy?"

Ron shrugs and tells him," He just apparated away."

Harry says he'll find him for Ron and gives him a weak smile and apparates away. Ron thinks he should not have told Harry about this because he knows Harry would think that it's his fault and -

Ron breathes. He does not cry. He should. But the tears won't fall.

What's wrong with him? His brother's fiance is dead, his nephew is dead and he can't even cry for them. It's pathetic.

Maybe he does have an emotional range of a teaspoon.

Ron feels horrible about not feeling horrible. But with so many deaths, he's just tired. He wants to feel good for once and then his brother says this and....

He's a horrible person.

Ron sits in his room of orange and wonders when he'll feel blue.

Ginny doesn't stay with her family, instead she takes her broom and soars into the sky, for fresh air.

The winds in her hair as she maneuvers her broom around trees and going further away from the Burrow so she can escape the madness.

But Penelope Clearwater's face doesn't escape her mind.

And for a minute, Ginny can't breathe..

She flies and lands on the ground, full of life as she glances at the Lovegood cottage on top of the hill.

Luna should know about this. She knew Penelope.

Ginny knew her too.

An 11 year old Ginny had walked in on Percy and her kissing. And it was intense and embarrasing.

No younger sibling should ever see that again.

That same 11 year old Ginny had threatened Penelope to not break Percy's heart and she hadn't.

Her heart died instead.

Ginny is angry at Percy for not telling her, she is angry at herself for not knowing and that anger turns into tears as she realises she's upset.

Penelope was nice to her after the whole first year incident. She even helped her study once. It's just not fair.

Ginny should be used to losing people by now but she's not. Everytime she hears someone is dead, her heart constricts and she realised that the ending of war is not an end to anything.

There is no "happily ever after"

She doesn't even think about the baby. She can't even think of Teddy being an orphan, how can she think about this baby's death?

However it's not just any baby, it's her nephew. She could have been an aunt and there were so many things she could do and-

He's dead, just like his mother who Ginny never had to chance to know about either.

For once, Ginny wishes she could be young again, maybe a toddler or a child, one who still was naive about the world and did not know the aftereffects of the war.

But she's not.

She's old enough to know that her brother needs her right now.

She has to tell Luna about it too. As she glances back at the blue cottage, she thinks to herself, 'not today'.

With determination on her face and sorrow in her heart, Ginny makes her way back to the Burrow.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

#percy weasley #weasley fanfiction #percy weasley deserves better #penelope clearwater

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devilscreekballad · 3 years ago

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Know what? Have a SPOILER for Charlie’s backstory (this version if you know him since childhood, other versions are just a little shorter. Enjoy

"Mr. Mulligan seems quite protective of ya," Finley ventures. "And pretty averse against ya bein' selfish...?"

You smile bitterly. "He is. But given what happened I'm... surprised he isn't obnoxiously overbearing."

"Huh?" Finley blinks at you.

You shuffle into a more comfortable position.

"He's trying to prevent history from repeatin' itself," you begin. "I think he'll be alright with me tellin' ya this, as long as ya don't tell anyone else." You roll your shoulders. "I told ya how I know Charlie. And though we knew each other since childhood, there was a time when we went separate ways for a while. He was riding with his brother Matthew an' some friends, while I stayed in town and did me own thing. Till one day Charlie came back alone. He looked like death himself."

You shudder.

"His clothes were drenched in blood, his eyes red and glassy and his face pale and disturbed. He almost fell off Wicklow when he stopped in the middle of the street and it took weeks till anyone could talk to Charlie again.

"Turned out the boys he and Matthew were riding with... one o' them had ratted the others out to the law after a bank robbery an' the other two then left Charlie and Matthew for dead when they then managed to make a run for it. Out o' greed. Matthew died and Charlie tracked the other three down. I heard from others that they were found in at least four other places."

Finley takes a moment to process that, and shudders.

"Exactly," you say, smiling softly. "But don't worry. Charlie is a good soul, unless ya severely cross him." You sigh sorrowfully. "Still, Charlie wasn't the same after that. He's been drinkin', an' had more morphine runnin' through his veins than blood. It was a bad year."

"What happened? I mean..."

"His oldest sister Ada an' I... we wouldn't budge from his side. No matter what he did, what insults he hurled at us, we stayed with him. He grew more quiet then. And one day he apologized to us for what an arse he's been. He was grateful that we stayed with him the whole time, and vowed to do better in the future. Went to apologize to the rest of his family an' the friends that were still willin' to talk to him. We started ridin' together after that." You sigh thoughtfully.

"Something wrong?"

"Not wrong, just... That wasn't the end of it. Told ya, Charlie had grown very quiet. Very withdrawn. He was helpful, but he kept away from others a lot. Me included. And then one day Charlie gets a wire from Ada. His youngest sister was gettin' married, and wanted Charlie to be there. I've never seen Charlie as scared as he was then."

"Scared?"

"Frightened out of' his wits. I didn't get it. Asked him what's wrong. He made excuses. Said he can't go. Then he insisted he had to go. It was a back an' forth and he was frayin' at the seams like anything." You shake your head. "I offered him to come with him. He was still shaken, but he agreed. I had a feeling it had to do somethin' with Matt... Everything went well till Charlie suddenly stormed out o' the ceremony."

Finley looks at you worried.

"Ada an' I went to look for him," you say after a long moment. "Found him cryin' his heart out. He didn't tell us at first what was wrong, so we sat with him. An' then it all burst out of him. Told us he was missin' Matthew, and how much it hurts that Matt couldn't be there, an' how that was his fault. Charlie blamed himself for what happened, 'cause he didn't put his foot down when he felt something was wrong. Didn't trust in his gut."

"So he learned the hard way his feelings there are never wrong?"

You chuckle as briefly as bitterly.

"He knew that before, but he ignored it whenever he felt like it couldn't be that bad. So... we sat with Charlie for a little longer then, till he began apologizing to us, and for ruining his sister's wedding an' all. But no one was mad at him. Charlie was all frazzled, but grateful, seein' how much people cared for him. The wedding continued. Was pretty nice. Charlie blossomed after that. He can still be a grump, but he's got a great heart. Well... after that we got Matt a nicer grave marker an' some flowers."

Finley looks at you and lowers his head.

"I'm sorry to hear," he says, but then gulps. "Really, four different places?"

"At least. Wanna hear the punchline? After what I just told ya about Charlie seriously went into the next sheriff's office and confessed to what he did there."

Finley blinks.

"How did he not hang for that?"

"He managed to convince the authorities that he had planned to hand their bodies over for the bounties, but had to leave due to his own injuries. And truth be told, that might even have been the truth. The charges for murder were dropped an' the bloody bastard even got the money."

Finley can only stare at you in amazement.

"Yer kidding me."

You shake your head. "No. What's weirder, though, was that that night Matthew finally contacted Charlie. Apparently Charlie got his brother's blessing to do whatever Charlie was uncertain about. Charlie later told me he had been devastated before 'cause he couldn't get through to Matthew. He figured it was his own anger and fear that put up a barricade between them."

You hadn't thought it possible, but Finley looks even more impressed now. You laugh amused.

"Yeah, Charlie's quite peculiar, but... I honestly wouldn't want to miss him. Good gracious, he even told me that if things hadn't gone that way he'd certainly be dead by now."

#choice of games #hosted games #the ballad of devil's creek #BaoDC ROs #BaoDC development #baodc #baodc spoilers

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hb-writes · 4 years ago

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A Little Raven

Written in response to Hauntober prompt #15: Raven.

Summary: From the Little Lady Blinder universe! A chat between sisters-in-law followed by a chat between Lizzie and Tommy. This is a bit long and self-indulgent and might not be particularly consistent with canon but oh well. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Characters Featured: Lizzie Shelby, Clara Shelby (Shelby!Sister), Tommy Shelby

—–

“Frances said you wanted me first?”

Lizzie turned from the window, allowing the passage of a brief smile as she glanced at her sister-in-law. Like her husband, Lizzie still saw a couple of kids when she looked at Clara and Finn, still saw the little girl who passed her time with books and papers while sitting on the stoop at Watery Lane, still saw the boy with a keen eye for mischief and a disposition towards unsanctioned sweets. She supposed those visions still held true. None of them were so different to be unrecognizable through the years. Some traits endured the transition to adulthood, no matter what transpired in the interim.

Clara stripped out of her coat, placing it over the back of the chair before following Lizzie’s gaze out to the yard where Ruby and Charles played with the nanny, their squeals and laughter sharp and clear through the pane of the closed window.

Clara sat in one of the armchairs, pulling her feet up and working on untying her boot laces while she waited. She was used to the reticent moments, used to people taking their time in revealing why she’d been summoned somewhere in the first place. She found it a pleasant change for Lizzie to be inviting her to the drawing-room for a visit rather than Tommy summoning her to his office for one of his chats, even if her sister-in-law was very clearly preoccupied.

The thud of Clara’s shoes hitting the floor as she slipped them off her feet pulled Lizzie’s eyes towards her for a moment before she settled them on the girl’s discarded boots, understated but still expensive, something Tommy had probably paid for.

Lizzie wasn’t ignoring her on purpose, Clara knew that. She was just distracted, caught up in her own thoughts, turning something over in her mind. Clara just wasn’t certain how she fit into those thoughts.

“Lizzie?” Clara said.

“Mmm?” Lizzie hummed, finally fixing her eyes on Clara.

“You did ask for me, right?” Clara said.

“I suppose you’d prefer to go be with the children,” Lizzie mused. “Or to go say hello to your brother?”

“Is he home already?” Clara asked, glancing down at the small watch on her wrist as she adjusted the clock face. It was barely past five.

Lizzie scoffed, gave a single shake of her head. Tommy was eternally late in coming home, and habitually premature in leaving it.

“Well, that leaves more time for us to catch up, then,” Clara offered, absently kneading the arch of her foot. “I came home to be with all of you, Lizzie.”

“Right, all of us,” Lizzie answered, sitting down in an adjacent armchair. “When’s the last time you saw all of us here, Clara? When’s the last time he graced us with his presence at a decent hour?”

It was the previous Sunday, Clara remembered, and he’d come out of his office just before dinner, played with Charles and Ruby a bit before eating with Clara, Lizzie, and the kids, but Clara had the feeling Lizzie didn’t want to be reminded of that.

“Did you talk to him?” Clara asked.

Lizzie took a deep breath and nearly gagged, feeling as though she wouldn’t be able to stop herself from conjuring up the contents of her latest meal, the sick feeling in her stomach beyond the typical bout of morning sickness, more of a nauseating dread which had settled in the pit of her stomach.

The last time she’d been here, in this condition, Lizzie had been optimistic. Nearly five years later, she felt anything but. And despite all the strength she’d decided on summoning, despite deciding to stay, to accept Tommy and his faults, to balance her head against her heart, she hadn’t planned on this as a part of the deal.

‘A little you and me,’ she’d offered Tommy when she’d told him of the first baby growing inside of her, a smile on her face, a bit of hope in her heart.

She had little hope this time, little positivity about the life prospects for yet another child of Thomas Shelby, a little boy nonetheless, a little raven-haired boy who would have his parents’ blue eyes, his father’s strong jaw, the unmistakable markings of a Shelby.

If Tommy had kept all of his promises, if he’d done right and put a proper stop to the sport for anyone named Shelby. If he’d kept Finn and Clara away from the life, Lizzie might have thought differently. She might have felt nothing but happiness at the prospect of another child with a little tuft of raven hair and bright blue eyes, but in half a decade, Tommy had dealt her plenty of empty assurances.

She feared enough for the children already. Her Ruby was a different child around her father, a bit nervous, a bit quiet. The girl didn’t know the same Tommy that Clara and Finn knew, nor the father Charlie had had for a time, at least while he was young.

This baby would never know that version of Tommy either, not really. Her children would spend their lives distant from the man they called dad, and there was part of Lizzie that didn’t think it to be a terrible thing.

Clara reached out to clasp Lizzie’s hand. “Lizz--”

“Polly says it’s a boy.”

“Oh,” Clara answered, pulling her hand back. “That’s--”

Lizzie cleared her throat and continued. “A little raven-haired boy named James.” She opened her cigarette case, placed the fag between her lips. “Jamie,” she added. “And no, I haven’t told your brother.”

Clara frowned. She was tired of holding the secret she’d accidentally overheard when Lizzie confided in Polly. She was tired of pretending with her brother, tired of avoiding him. It wasn’t easy work, withholding information from him because, despite the best of Clara’s efforts, Tommy possessed an uncanny ability to know when his sister was keeping something from him.

“He loves being a father, Lizzie. He’ll be--”

“Happy?” she suggested. “I’m less worried about your brother being happy than I am worried for all of you kids.”

“All of us?”

Lizzie lit the cigarette, puffing before she pointed it at Clara.

“Yes, you and Finn are included.”

“There’s nothing to worry about, Lizzie.”

“Right, with Finn running around getting himself shot and you--”

“What about me?”

“Neither one of you kids has a healthy sense of self-preservation, always pushing when you haven’t a need, and you’ve passed it right on to those two. Maybe it’s in the blood, an inherited recklessness that--”

“Is that really what you’re worried about? That I’ve taught the kids to stand up for themselves and I’ll teach the baby the same?” Clara asked.

Lizzie glanced out the window again, the things she was truly scared about swirling in her mind while she watched Ruby and Charles holding hands as they went round in circles.

“It’s a bad omen, a raven,” she said.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Clara answered. “A baby can’t be a bad omen.”

Lizzie was beginning to believe that the Shelby name was a curse and that despite her husband’s promises, not one of the kids would live a life unmarred by it, not Finn, not Clara, not Charles nor Ruby, and not the unborn son growing in her womb. And despite knowing Thomas Shelby loved the children, she feared what she already knew to be true, that loving a person wasn’t always enough.

These days, Tommy’s moments of softness were harder to come by. The types of moments Clara held on to when her brother was difficult, the moments that reminded her through the tough spots that he did much of what he did out of love, for protection or survival. Lizzie didn’t know her children would have that, didn’t know that a raven-haired boy looking just like his father could ever garner as much care as he’d deserve from the man, enough of the affection that he would need to someday to get through the tough spots.

“He’s not how he once was with you,” Lizzie said.

“He’s not been like that for a long while, Lizzie, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love them.”

“I know he loves them, loves all of you, but I worry someday they won’t have memories enough to forgive him as you do.”

“I don’t forgive him because of the memories, Lizzie,” Clara answered. “I forgive him because he’s nearly my father and because I know he cares for me as much as I care for him. Ruby and Charles know that. Jamie will, too.”

Clara joined Lizzie on the couch. “And regardless, you care for us all well enough whether that fool joins us for dinner or not.”

Lizzie set her cigarette down in the tray and accepted Clara’s offered hug, allowing herself to release a breath of relief with the girl in her arms.

“Well, that may be, but it doesn’t settle my nerves about you and Finn,” Lizzie said as she pulled away.

Clara rolled her eyes. “You’ve not--”

“Glad I’m not the only one concerned.”

Clara glanced at her watch again before looking at Tommy where he stood by the door. “You’ve actually come early?”

He nodded. “Someone had Adam make it very clear in my diary that I was meant to be home at a respectable hour today.”

Clara hummed, feigning an impressed surprise, as though she hadn’t begged Tommy’s personal secretary at the commons to adjust his schedule to accommodate him being back in Warwickshire so early on a Friday evening.

“Right. I think I’ll leave you two and go say hello to Charlie and Ruby while we wait on Finn,” Clara offered, slipping past Tommy on her way to the door.

“Forgetting something, Clara?”

Clara turned back to him, snatching the forgotten boots from his outstretched hand.

“When our brother gets in, we can have a talk about your excursion in London on Tuesday evening, eh?”

Clara sighed. “I think we’re a bit old for a lecture, Tommy. It was nothing.”

“Seems like you two idiots’ll never be too old for a lecture,” he answered. “But go on. Go see the kids. I’m sure they’ve been asking after you all day.”

Tommy watched his sister leave before taking the seat beside his wife. “Now, while we wait for Finn, you and I can have a talk about that baby you’ve got growing inside you, eh Lizzie?”

Lizzie scoffed. "Polly told you then? Or was it Clara?”

Tommy shook his head. Of course, his sister knew. He cleared his throat.

“It was actually you, Lizzie,” he said, taking her hand in his. “Been eating honey on everything. Last time you did that was when you were pregnant with our Ruby.”

Lizzie nodded, looked out at the kids again, saw Clara had joined Ruby and Charles, and the three of them were laughing like a set of maniacs as they ran about the lawn.

“You’re worried,” Tommy offered, guiding his wife’s face to his. “Let me into that head of yours, Lizzie.”

She leaned into his touch as he cupped her cheek, allowed herself that comfort.

“To clear it out?” she mumbled.

Tommy nodded. “To clear it out. Just like we agreed.”

Lizzie placed her hand on top of his.

“Ruby’ll be asking after another sister.”

“Well, she’ll be disappointed then,” Lizzie answered. “It’s a boy.”

Tommy nodded. There was a time when he thought it mattered, back when boys became blinders and girls were considered liabilities but Tommy had stopped thinking that way, started thinking that Lizzie was right. And Grace had been right. There was only one way to keep them all safe.

“Either way,” he answered. “Another little you and me, eh?”

Lizzie nodded and Tommy pulled his eyes away at the approaching footsteps and laughter as Ruby and Charlie piled into the room.

“Daddy! Daddy!”

“And what have you lot been up to, eh?” Tommy asked, pulling Ruby into his lap as Charlie came to sit beside them.

“We’ve been playing, daddy!” Ruby said.

“Dad, Aunt Clara said she and Uncle Finn are ready for a shouting at whenever you are,” Charlie said. “They went to your office.”

Tommy shook his head, glanced quickly at Lizzie before he looked back to his boy.

“What are you going to shout at them for, daddy?” Ruby asked, turning her head to look up at him.

“Don’t you worry about that, sweetheart,” Tommy answered.

“He’s gonna shout because they’ve been naughty,” Charles said to his sister.

“Don’t shout very much, daddy,” Ruby answered. “It’ll ruin our supper.”

“I’m not going to shout. We’re just going to have a talk about them setting a better example for you kids.”

“And then we’ll have supper?” Ruby asked.

“Then supper, Ruby,” he said. “I had Frances ask chef to make a special honey cake for dessert.”

“For mummy?” Ruby asked. “Mummy loves honey cake.”

“And for your baby brother,” Lizzie answered, pulling Ruby’s hand to rest on her stomach. “The one growing in my belly.”

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Read more Little Lady Blinder stories here.

#Hauntober #peaky blinders #peaky blinders fanfic #lizzie shelby #tommy shelby #Shelby!Sister #little lady blinder #clara shelby #lizzie stark #ruby shelby #charles shelby #tommy x lizzie

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tchallasbabymama · 4 years ago

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The Temple- Chapter 1/?

N’Jadaka x OC

A/N: I thought this was going to be a two parter, but now it’s looking like maaaaybe 3? I’m just now getting back into my writing and forgot how longwinded I can be lol. Enjoy!

CW: short mention of suicidal ideation

Previous chapter: Prologue

3256 Words

N’Jadaka’s eyes blinked open and he was met with yet another day in Wakanda. This one was a little different than all his other mornings there because it was the first time he got to wake up in his own bed in his own quarters (outside of that one day he was king.) N’Jadaka had spent the last three months in a psychiatric treatment facility working on his anger and mental health issues. When he woke up after the civil war he caused he was livid. He had wanted to die on that mountain and unfortunately the feeling didn’t leave him until about a month into his treatment. He felt he had nothing to live for since his entire life’s work had gone up in flames before his eyes. He accomplished his one goal in life only to have it snatched back from him a day later. Everything important to him in his life had been taken from him and he felt he had nothing else to live for, so his cousin, King T’Challa, arranged for N’Jadaka to spend some time at Ithemba Center for Mental Wellness.

He would never admit it out loud, but N’Jadaka was scared to go to Ithemba. He thought his stint as king would have turned Wakandans against him, but it did the opposite. The royal family had decided that transparency was the best policy and did a press conference explaining the entire situation to the people. T’Challa explained what had happened between his father and uncle, what the prince’s life had been like up to that point, and the fact that while he did usurp the throne he did it the right way according to Wakandan law so he wouldn't be charged with treason. The people of Wakanda were shocked, but welcomed their new prince with open arms. He wasn’t aware of the new developments because he was still resting in a healing pod in Shuri’s lab at the time, but when he went to Ithemba he was surprised to find out that everybody already knew him and was more than willing to help him. N’Jadaka hadn’t received that much care and attention since he was a child and he didn't really know how to handle it. It took him weeks to learn how to open himself to others, and it wasn’t until his last month of treatment that he even began opening himself up to the other patients in group therapy.

N’Jadaka’s main therapist was a woman named Ife. She reminded him so much of his mother that he had almost no choice but to open himself to her, crying in her lap during their first couple sessions. Ife had been incredibly patient with the emotional yet emotionally repressed prince, allowing him to work through his overwhelming feelings of anger, sadness, and hurt.

His time with Ife and the other patients at the center had been incredibly healing and he felt like a new man. He still felt like he had a ways to go, and he could tell he needed something, but couldn’t figure out what. His healing didn’t feel anywhere close to being done.

A knock at the door interrupted his morning laziness.

“Ngena.”

In walked the king of Wakanda flanked by two of his Dora Milaje, who he politely dismissed to stand outside the door. He walked across the room and sat in the plush velvet wingback chair by the full bookshelves.

“Sup man?” N’Jadaka barely opened his eyes to speak to his cousin. The bed was too comfortable.

“My apologies cousin, did I wake you?”

“Nah I’m up, this bed just won’t let me go.”

T’Challa chuckled at his cousin’s laziness. He completely understood, the beds were the most comfortable beds he’d experienced in all of his travels and time abroad in school.

“I just wanted to formally invite you to attend breakfast at 9. It’s casual, just family and whatever few friends are staying in the palace with us at the time. M’Baku will be joining us today.”

“The gorilla nigga?”

T’Challa tried and failed to stifle his laughter, which quickly spread to his slightly younger cousin.

“Yes the gorilla nigga.”

“Ooooh I’m telling M’Baku you said that. Better yet, I’m telling Auntie.”

“I’d really rather you not.”

N’Jadaka chuckled and wondered if this is how it always would’ve been if they had grown up together. The thought was more bitter than sweet, so he pushed it aside for the time being.

“Maybe just this once.”

T’Challa grinned at his cousin and he also wondered how life would’ve been had they known each other their whole lives.

“Thank you. Oh and get up, it’s already 8:30” T’Challa stood and walked towards the door.

“These damn beds…” N’Jadaka shook his head and reluctantly flung the sheet back and swung his legs over the side of his bed, completely forgetting he slept naked. He rushed to cover himself in the king’s presence.

“Shit, my bad, man.”

“For…?”

“Nigga I got my dick swinging!”

“You’re sorry for being naked? Wh- oh that’s right. We aren’t puritanical like you are used to in America. Nudity isn't scandalous here, it’s just a body. But I will leave and let you get ready. See you, umzala.”

N’Jadaka stood there shocked. He knew of Wakandan culture, but experiencing it was going to be an adjustment. Just how different were they? They were never affected by colonization so the oppressive white supremacist ideology wouldn’t exist there. He had a lot of unlearning to do and a lot of questions to ask his family.

He eventually shook himself out of his thoughts and made his way to the en suite bathroom. He turned on the shower using the touchpad and the water fell from the ceiling like rain. He scrubbed down in the vanilla chai body wash he had requested and afterwards he covered his skin in shea butter. He walked into his enormous closet and stood there overwhelmed at the choices. His inner child wanted to throw a fit for everything he’d missed out on, but N’Jadaka took a deep breath to center himself before walking over to the section of clothes that he recognized. He was so nervous about breakfast he almost dressed to impress, but then he remembered T’Challa’s words and casual outfit. He grabbed his Lost Tribe hoodie and threw on his favorite black jeans and his Timbs. He swooped all his locs to one side of his head and threw on his gold glasses. N’Jadaka took a deep breath and walked towards the door.

“Chill out...it’ll be fine.”

The guards stationed outside his door directed him to the dining room where he was met with the smiling faces of his family members. Ramonda was the first to notice he’d entered the room..

“Mholo, umtshana!”

She met him for a hug and kissed his cheek. He smiled so hard his dimples looked deeper than ever and he hugged her back.

“Mornin, Auntie. T, Lil Bit, Charlie’s Angel, Big Man.” N’Jadaka greeted his cousins, Nakia, and M’Baku.

Yet again, T’Challa failed to stifle a laugh, which he tried to play off with a cough. Nakia lightly backhanded his chest and sucked her teeth at him.

“Little bit? Don't start with me, bubble wrap!”

“Who is Charlie and why am I their angel?”

“That is not my name.”

Shuri, Nakia, and M’Baku spoke over each other.

Thankfully the queen mother was there to settle the children down right as the food was being brought out. N’Jadaka looked at the table and was surprised to see that Ramonda was seated next to T’Challa and that the only empty seat was at the end of the table.

The king noticed N’Jadaka’s nervousness as he watched him sit down gingerly and take in his surroundings.

“So N’Jadaka, how was your first night in the palace? Our beds are the most comfortable in the world.”

“Auntie, I almost didn’t come to breakfast. That bed had a hold on me.”

“You must come visit my people sometimes. If you think you sleep good here, wait until you have the crisp mountain air-”

“Nah lemme stop you right there. Crisp is code for cold, and I don't do that shit. Sorry Auntie.”

“I don't do that shit either. When I was staying there I shivered the whole time, even with the beautiful furs and blankets! I’m just not built for the cold.”

N’Jadaka grimaced at the mention of his time as a burgeoning world dictator. He was thankful nobody noticed.

He was also thankful for the large platters of food the kitchen staff came and sat in front of them. They passed the food around the table and soon enough there was silence as everyone dug into what N’Jadaka would later describe as the best meal he ever had.

After breakfast, the three men retired to T’Challa’s office while the princess hurried off to her lab, Nakia disappeared, and Ramonda tended to her garden.

“So, N’Jadaka...I wanted to talk to you about a few things-”

“Then why is Mighty Joe Young here?”

M’Baku rolled his eyes.

“Again, that is not my name. Who even is this person?”

“It’s a big ass gorilla.”

“Oh- well in that case…”

T’Challa cleared his throat.

“As I was saying. Before anything, we need to address your crowning ceremony. Obviously you are part of the royal family, but by Wakandan law, all royalty must be officially crowned to be able to hold a title. If you would like to be Prince N’Jadaka son of Prince N’Jobu we must have the ceremony.”

N’Jadaka’s voice caught in his throat and his eyes got misty.

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

M’Baku put a hand on his shoulder.

“It’s good to have you, brother.”

“Good to be here.”

T’Challa fought tears of his own.

“Ok so uh, that’s that. We can hash those details out later. Now, the second thing I wanted to bring up with you is this: M’Baku and Nakia have offered to show you around the merchant tribe here in the city, the river tribe, and Jabariland. Shuri will get you acquainted with the mining tribe, and I will take you out to the border tribe on Wednesday.”

“Aight, sounds like a plan, but I don’t want the surface-level touristy shit.”

T’Challa chuckled.

“Noted. Now, lastly,” T’Challa pulled up a projection of a futuristic yet somehow still modern building next to a basketball court.

N’Jadaka’s stomach dropped.

“What is this?”

“I want to open our borders to the ‘Lost Tribe’ as you call it. Maybe to the rest of the world eventually, but at the time they are less of a concern. In addition to that, I-”

The king was cut off by Nakia entering the room.

“Perfect time, love.”

“Sorry for being late, this baby runs my life now.”

“I’m getting a baby cousin?!”

Nakia looked at him dryly.

“Yes, N’Jadaka, you are getting a baby cousin.”

He peeped her attitude and settled down. If there was one thing he knew in this world, it was never piss of a pregnant woman.

“So the Outreach Centers, yes. I had actually had the idea for a while, but it took the country almost burning down for this idiot to see I was right. T’Challa had the idea to use your old apartment complex as the first Wakandan Outreach Center. Hopefully if it goes well, we could expand to-”

N’Jadaka zoned out staring at the projection. His vision may not have come true in the way he thought it would, but this would certainly be a step towards the betterment of the lives of Black people everywhere. N’Jadaka couldn't help but grin.

“I think we lost him…”

“Cousin!”

He snapped out of his daze.

“Yeah I-I like it. Thank you, this really means a lot. One thing though?”

“Yes?”

“I want it dedicated to my pops.”

T’Challa smiled and zoomed in on the name above the door. It read “Prince N’Jobu’s Wakandan Outreach Center”. Then he took them on a 3-D tour of the facility, ending with the memorial to N’Jobu in room 1401.

N’Jadaka nearly broke down in tears.

“Cool. Thanks, man. For everything. This is…” N’Jadaka took a deep breath. “Just, thanks…”

The other three Wakandans smiled back at him fondly, an occurrence it seemed he would have to get used to.

“I’m glad you like it. Now if you three will excuse me, I have work to do.”

Nakia kissed T’Challa’s forehead and left the room.

“Aight, I need something lighthearted. A nigga is tired of crying. Oh! Actually I got some questions…”

“Ask away.”

“So earlier you mentioned how free and open and shit yall are here...I’m single and haven’t had any in like 6 months so where can I go to find some pussy. Since I’m a prince do I just like, I don't know, have concubines brought to me? I don't know how this works”

M’Baku snorted.

“Clearly.”

N’Jadaka flipped him off while T’Challa answered.

“No, we do not have ‘concubines’ though we do sort of have sex workers, which we can discuss later. You know, it would do you good to read some Wakandan history books...and maybe even some of our sex education material.”

“Ay man, I already know all that.”

“Not the way we teach it. Plus our birth control is better here.”

“More effective?”

“And no side effects. Trust me, you’ll want to visit the library at the end of the hall, cousin.”

N’Jadaka considered his suggestion and made a mental note to check out the library later that day.

“Yes, maybe you’ll learn a thing or two,” M’Baku chimed in.

“My guy, I know how sex works! I’m just curious about the culture surrounding sex. T, you said y'all aren’t puritanical like America...expand on that.”

“Well the list of books I just sent to your beads would be able to cover this in greater detail than I can at the moment, but basically every preconceived notion you have about sex, gender, attraction, etc. has been tainted by colonialism as a means of control over the population.”

“Hanuman…”

“Yeah I know that, I guess I just can’t really conceptualize a world without all that sexism and homophobia and shit.”

“What is homophobia?” M’Baku asked, genuinely confused. The cousins answered at the same time.

“When people hate gay niggas.”

“The hatred of, or at least the disdain for, those who are attracted to their same gender.”

“And we ain't even getting into the people who aren't men or women, that shit blows people's minds.”

“Why?”

The cousins continued to explain the outside world to M’Baku for what felt like hours. T’Challa looked at the clock and stood.

“Well gentlemen, as...depressing as this conversation has been, we must get to the council meeting.”

“I need a drink after that. The strongest Jabari mead!”

“Yeah imagine living with that shit for 30 years then coming here. I’m not gonna know how to act.”

“You’ll learn.”

The three made their way to the council meeting and N’Jadaka had never been so bored in all of his life. He started nodding off at one point and M’Baku elbowed him in his side when he started to snore. When it was finally over they parted ways and N’Jadaka headed to the library. He had plenty of reading to do.

He started with the Wakandan history books reading about the lives of his ancestors. His fathers stories had given him a good foundation to build on, but what he found in the books blew his mind.

Wakandans can trace their history for thousands of years, all the way back to the time of the great Bashenga, the first Black Panther. Growing up as a Black American, N’Jadaka had no connection to his mother’s family history because there was no record. When the Lost Tribe was enslaved and brought to the west, they were recorded as cargo, not people. The enslavers didn’t care about their names or where they came from, and when they got to shore their families continued to be ripped apart and sold to the highest bidder. They weren’t allowed to play drums and congregate, they weren’t allowed to read, they weren’t allowed to marry. There was no written record of his people, and the most they could go on was family bibles which almost never went back before the mid 1800s.

N’Jadaka was overwhelmed with the information, so he decided to switch to something else and come back to the history books later. He picked up “Intimacy and Sex” by Ami Nbunda and flipped through the pages. He skimmed the table of contents and was surprised by what he saw.

The first chapter was on anatomy, but it actually included intersex people instead of just focusing on male and female bodies. The next chapter was about loving and respecting yourself and others, but not in the slut-shaming way of the outside world. The next few chapters were on the mental and emotional sides of intimacy, and the last few were on birth control, sexual health, attraction, healthy communication, and more resources.

The prince couldn’t believe what he was seeing as he flipped through the pages. He stopped on a full-color photo of a vulva with all the parts labeled.

“This is for kids? Damn, we really living in two different worlds. America would never.”

He turned the page and saw a to-scale model of the entire clitoris, and his eyes bugged out of his head.

“That shit’s a whole wishbone…”

He continued to read through the pages in awe. M’Baku was right, he was learning a thing or two.

N’Jadaka spent the whole day in the library reading book after book on everything he could get his hands on. If it hadn’t been for his guards alerting him to the time, he would’ve missed dinner. He grabbed the last two books and went to drop them in his quarters before heading to dinner.

“Umzala, have you been in the library this whole time?”

“Yeah man, it’s a lot to take in. I might have to take that sex ed book back to the states.”

“We plan on doing just that at the Outreach Centers. Comprehensive sex education is a necessity, and since your government prefers to keep people in the dark about how their own bodies work it will be our job to educate those who come through our doors. All but the last chapter, of course.”

T’Challa winked and N’Jadaka felt like he had missed something.

“You mean the resources? Makes sense, those books wouldn't be available outs-”

“Not the books, dear, the Temple.” Ramonda chimed in.

“The what? I ain't got that far yet.”

Shuri rounded the corner and N’Jadaka expected the conversation to stop, but no.

“Remember earlier when you asked about concubines and I said we have sex workers?”

Ramonda cut her eyes at N’Jadaka as he nodded.

“Well that term doesn’t quite encompass what they do. They are sexual healers blessed by Bast herself and they reside in the Temple of Healing on the outskirts of the city near the Land of the Dead. They are known as the Daughters of Bast.”

“Now I feel bad for calling them concubines.”

“You should.” Ramonda said as she slapped him upside the head.

“Ow Auntie, damn”

T’Challa was thankful that his mother had someone else to fuss over, and he chuckled.

“I think it would be a good idea for you to pay them a visit. They are healers, after all.”

Next Chapter

#cecewritessometimes #black panther fic #njadaka #the temple #n'jadaka x oc

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antoine-roquentin · 4 years ago

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Before moving to New York City, I drove every where. I got pulled over 3 times in 15 years; two speeding tickets and an illegal left hand turn.

The first year I was back in Michigan, I got pulled over 5 times. Each time it was for impeding traffic and I did not get a ticket.

I drove a dark grey, 1998 Chevy Venture van that was in storage for several years. It was in good shape.

The traffic stops were unlike any I had experienced in the past. The first one was in Monroe County on Dixie Highway near Sterling State Park. I was coming home from the park with my dogs. The sun was setting and it was twilight. My Poodle, Merlin, sat in the passenger seat and Indy, a Jack Russel Terrier, was in the back. I was driving down Dixie Highway at 50 mph, which is the speed limit. Flashing lights popped up behind me. My heart raced. What did I do? I pulled over and tried to calm down; I didn’t want to look suspicious.

It was a Monroe County Sheriff. I thought one of my running lights was out. As the sheriff approached my van, he unfastened the top of the holster of his gun. I had not experienced this before. I wrote it off as the new standard procedure on all traffic stops. Or maybe this guy was a cowboy. I said as little as possible.

I waited for the, “Do you know why I pulled you over?” This officer asked where I was going. He looked in the window and flashed his light on Merlin and his demeanor changed. The stern look on his face disappeared, but he seemed…annoyed… I guess is the best word. I thought I was going to get a ticket for Merlin being in the front seat. He didn’t ask if I’d been drinking or had any weapons. He asked to see my license, looked at it under his flashlight and handed it back. Then he explained he pulled me over because I was going 3 miles under the speed limit and was impeding traffic. There were no other cars on the road. I said I was not aware of it. He told me to keep an eye on it and that he was giving me a warning. I thanked him. He walked back to his car.

I remember being confused about it, but since I didn’t get a ticket, I didn’t think to much about it. Impeding traffic, never heard of it before.

Same thing happened in Flat Rock and Huron Township. Impeding traffic, didn’t get a ticket. On the third stop, I asked one of the officers if impeding traffic was a new law in Michigan and he got a little snappy with me. The oddest one was the second time I got stopped in Huron Township.

Merlin was a tall dog who often sat in the passenger seat. When he was in the passenger seat or the back seat, he was tall enough to be mistaken for a person, especially at night. When the officer got to my window he asked, “Who’s in the back? I said, “No one. Just my dogs.” He asked me two more times. “Who’s in the back?” And I said, “It’s a dog.” He asked me to take the dog out of the vehicle.

The back of the van only opened on the passenger side, I got out, called Merlin to the front and took him out through the driver’s side door. The officer seemed annoyed as he said, “Is that a Poodle?” I said yes and put Merlin back in the van. The officer seemed mad as he explained the impeding traffic law, like I tricked him somehow and was wasting his time.

After that, I had the speedometer on the van checked to see if it was working correctly. It was.

The scariest one was the night I was driving home from my sister’s house at around 10 pm. I was going down Middlebelt Road, again in Huron Township. There was a Huron Township police car behind me since I turned onto Middlebelt. I kept checking my speedometer and I was doing the speed limit. After about a mile, he turned on his lights. I thought, “Again?” It is frustrating to be pulled over repeatedly by the police. Your heart races every time and you are scared. There is the thought, “What if it’s not the real cops?”

This time there were two Huron Township SUV police vehicles that pulled me over. One cop walked up on the passenger side of my van. I saw him in the sideview mirror unholstering his gun as he sidled up to the window where Merlin was sitting. Merlin rarely barked at people. His fingers relaxed when he saw Merlin.

I thought, “Holy crap! Maybe my van matches the description of a vehicle used in a crime.” This is a rural area, it’s about 10 pm and it is dark out. I’m a woman alone. Thank God I had Merlin with me.

I rolled down my window and was asked to roll down the passenger window. I did. I asked the officer, “Did I do something wrong?” because I was at a loss. He asked me if I’d been drinking and if I had any weapons. I said no. He took my license and examined it with his flashlight. He handed it back and asked where I was going. I was heading home and explained where that was and the route I was taking to get there. The whole time the other cop is still standing on the passenger side with his hand on his holstered gun.

The first officer explained I was driving erratically and going 5 miles under the speed limit and went through the impeding traffic law as if I was five years old. I didn’t get a ticket.

It was puzzling and irritating. I felt I was being punished for driving an old van. But what could I do?

One day, sitting at a restaurant having breakfast with my Dad; our old neighbor came in and said, “There’s a black man stealing your van. He’s behind the wheel right now.” I paused a minute and realized he was referring to Merlin. Bells went off.

I was furious. I wanted to go home and rage at every police department that pulled me over. I wasn’t impeding traffic, it’s not my van, it’s not my driving–they thought Merlin was a black man!

That’s why I kept getting pulled over. They thought it was a black man in an old van. I was so angry I wanted to drive to Dearborn at night with Merlin in the passenger seat and create a big stink when I got pulled over. “Call the news!” I’d shout! I wanted to rage at someone. But who? I couldn’t prove any of it. If only I’d realized it as it happened.

There were plenty of times black men pulled up next to me when Merlin was in the passenger seat and said, “Hey, a brother dog.” I should have known. John Steinbeck wrote in “Travels with Charley,” Charley was also a Poodle, that he had to be careful driving in the South. He got in trouble a few times because people thought Charlie was a black man. How could I be so stupid!

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avatarvader · 4 years ago

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A New Year’s Resolution

So this was made for the Romione Secret Santa Event in the HPRomione Discord (It’s a lot of fun and there are some great people in the server.). I was the secret santa for @be11atrixthestrange Hope you enjoy and happy holidays to all!

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Resolution

noun

A firm decision to do or not to do something.

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The night was waning upon the Burrow as snow trickled down upon its brightly lit windows. 2004 was coming to a close in about two hours. Ron was excited for the new year, another one in which he would get to spend with the most amazing and interesting person in the world to him. Ron felt his breast pocket for the box he had shrunk while Hermione was in the shower and grinned to himself.

He had it all planned out, when the clock would strike twelve everyone would cheer and Hermione would turn to give him a New Year’s kiss. He’d already be down on one knee, in one hand the ring he had purchased for her and roses in the other. He’d mastered the summon flowers charm when he learned that she’d gush over roses.

He had his speech already written down and he’d gone over it twelve times in the last week alone. Truthfully that’s why he worked at the Ministry so late recently. That and he was scared of blurting it out in the middle of dinner.

Thinking through everything and knowing it was finally happening tonight had made Ron parched. He made his way into the Burrow’s where he heard Angelina chatting with Ginny about their pregnancies while George was howling drunkenly about Verity to Harry.

“I can understand the need to make Christmas special,” George slurred “But Christmas is already a special time!”

“You don’t think that proposing on Christmas isn’t sweet?” Harry laughs, he too is on the tipsy side. “Better than what I did.” Harry lamented as he remembered his attempt to make his proposal to Ginny special. Harry had wanted to take her on a fly around Hogwarts and Hogsmeade, before stopping on a cliffside overlooking the Black Lake. However, when he had gotten to The Burrow and saw her grinning face he panicked and proposed right there, in the Burrow’s kitchen…. as Molly was cooking. To say that his mother-in-law was enthused was an understatement.

“Well at least yours was memorable,” George nudged. “Verity won’t be able to remember whether it was Christmas or her proposal in a few years. Holiday proposals are stupid and overrated.” George declared.

Ron felt a sinking feeling in his stomach hearing his brother’s words. Of course, it was stupid. Why did I think this would be special? Ron picked up his drink and walked into the family room, his mood shot to hell.

Ron sat down on the love seat and stared at the fire that was roaring in the family hearth.

“Ronnie, you alright dear?” His mum asked with a smile. “You seem down.”

“I’m fine, mum.” Ron glanced away to see Hermione talking with Percy about a policy she was trying to pass. “Just- not feeling great is all.”

He felt his mum’s cool hand press on his forehead without warning. “Well, you don’t feel warm. Is it your stomach?”

It’s my heart, I really wanted to do this today.

“I’m sure it’s nothing Mum, how was Bermuda?” Ron replied, deftly wanting to change the subject.

“Oh it was lovely,” Molly gushed, “Your father and I had so much se-“

“Is that Charlie?” Ron cut in, blushing at what his mum was about to say. “I really don’t get to see him enough. Oi Charlie!” Ron got up and made his way over to Charlie and his lady friend he brought from Romania.

“5…4…3…2…1, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!” The Weasleys shouted as the clock chimed midnight, George and Angelina popped off some fireless fireworks in the house. They bounded from person to person pinging off of their noses before zooming away. Around them, couples turned into their respective partners and kissed in the New Year. Hermione turned to him and sank into his arms, her head pressing against his chest.

How perfect it would have been.

Hermione’s hands rested on Ron’s chest as she stood on her tiptoes to capture his lips with hers. Her hand pushes the small box in his breast pocket in his chest.

Oh fuck me, she’s going to find out!

“Ron, what’s that in your pocket?” She pressed his chest to feel the object again.

“N-Nothing.” Ron lied. Make this work in your favour, old boy.

“Did you forget to clean out your pockets?” Hermione scowled. “You KNOW they put cardboard in there so the shirt doesn’t wrinkle. I swear if our brand-new washing machine gets clogged up by cardboard you left in there, I’ll make sure you sleep on my side of the bed…” Ron cringed knowing her side was lumpy and stiffer than he cared for.

Execute this properly chap, timing is key.

“Hermione,” Ron sighed as she reached into his pocket and pulled out the deep blue box.

Ron watched Hermione’s eyes as she gazed at the box, he saw her eyes widen as she realized what it was.

Now old boy!! On your knee!

Ron sunk to his knee as he flicked his right hand to draw his wand from its holster. (Auror technique that makes for easy drawing.). He swooped it high over his head, never once letting his gaze be torn from Hermione’s eyes.

Rose petals appeared from nothingness and fell gently like snowflakes around them. The pair of them, despite being surrounded by the Weasley’s felt like they were alone in this one instance in time. All distractions unseen, all voices tuned out.

“R-Ron?” She gasped. “W-What are… What is this?”

“Hermione.” Ron’s heart was thumping in his chest. He held the box out for her to take from him. "Open it, love."

She opened the box and saw a beautiful, yet simple ring. It was the home to three (rather small) stones, Aquamarine and Sapphire on either side, with a slightly larger diamond in the middle. The band was silver, and woven in a lattice pattern. It was simple yet elegant.

“I-is that our birthstones?” Hermione said as she turned her attention back to Ron.

“I've wanted to ask you this to ask this for a long, long, time.” Ron swallowed thickly. “I love you. I love you so much a-and I want to be with you for the rest of my life.” Hermione’s free hand covered her mouth to stop herself from blurting out her answer, he clearly planned this for her and she wanted to make sure he said what he wanted to.

“As daft as it may be to ask this question-” He took the box from her hand and took the ring out and held it just over her left ring finger. “-Hermione Granger. Would you do me the honor of marrying me?”

“Yes, of course, Ron. Of course!” She said, her eyes brimming with tears. Ron slid the ring onto her finger and she crashed into him, hugging him as tightly as she ever had before.

Ron stood up and leaned in to kiss her again, which she happily responded to.

Reality snapped back, all of the Weasley siblings were watching the newly engaged couple.

Bill and Fleur hugged each other and smiled knowingly, they had seen how tenderly and affectionately Ron cared for her during their stay at Shell Cottage during the war.

Charlie grinned at his little brother, he knew that Ron would eventually get the courage to ask her. Charlie had helped Ron move into their place together and when Ron took Charlie out for obligatory drinks afterward, Ron couldn’t stop talking about how amazing Hermione was.

Percy smiled at the couple, reminiscing at how he watched their friendship blossom, growing up and becoming friends together during their first three years of Hogwarts. Hermione would come to Percy in a huff to ‘Sort out that brother of yours! He doesn’t care about his studies!’ Percy would never say it to her face, but he always thought Ron was a calming force for Hermione.

George was crying. The combination of a generous amount of alcohol and seeing his brother proposing had sent him over the edge. He wasn’t crying because he thought Ron was making a bad decision, or that Hermione and he weren't compatible. He was crying because of the bet he lost all those years ago. Fred bet him during their 6th year that Ron and Hermione would get engaged at a family function and that Ron wouldn’t hesitate for even a moment. George thought that Ron would be a mumbling and stumbling mess. He owed Fred now and his twin wasn’t around to collect.

Ginny was surprised to find Ron on his knee, he was talking to Hermione in low tones, so only they could hear each other. It was quite clear what he was doing though. Ginny’s heart leaped as she saw her brother, her closest friend growing up, slide the ring on Ginny's best friend. She muttered a quick “It’s about time isn’t it?” To her husband jokingly when she realized. Harry was crying. She rubbed Harry’s back soothingly.

Harry took off his glasses as he watched his best best friend in the whole world propose to his other best friend who was like a sister to him. Harry knew they’d be happy together. Despite all their bickering and arguments at Hogwarts, it seemed that dating and living together seemed to ease the tension between them. Admittedly, there was PROBABLY another factor, but Harry didn’t want to think about their intimate life that deeply. It was bad enough walking in on them in the kitchen the one time. Harry knew they would make each other happy. That was all he wanted for them. His best friends, who gave him so much joy and happiness in his life when he needed it most. The pair that had almost acted as parents to him during school. They had a certain way with each other, their love for each other came naturally, all they had to do was get there. Harry only wanted the best for his closest friends, and the fact that they seemed to choose each other filled Harry’s heart with so much emotion.

Molly turned after kissing her husband to see Ron on his knee in front of Hermione a ring of rose petals shower down upon them and Ron slipped a ring on her finger.

“What just happened?!” She squeaked to her husband. “Oh, Merlin I missed it!!” She lamented as Hermione sank into her now Fiancé’s arms. The newly engaged couple kissed, both smiling into each other's lips. Ron pulled back and looked around the room and flushed red with embarrassment.

“So, erm…. Happy New Year?” He said sheepishly. Molly squealed with joy and rushed to wrap her youngest child in her arms. She kissed his forehead before she moved over to her future daughter in law.

Arthur smiled at his youngest boy as he was congratulated by his siblings. Ginny, Fleur and Molly were cooing over the beauty of the ring. Ron was being pounded on his back by Charlie, and George had slung his arm around Ron’s shoulders singing a hearty and happy song.

Arthur made his way into the crowd. “I believe an official 'welcome' to the family is in order, Hermione. We're so excited it's finally official.” Arthur opened his arms wide as she hugged him rather tightly.

“There’s no other family I’d want to join,” she said with a beaming smile as she pulled out of the hug. Hermione was soon distracted by Molly fretting over wedding plans so Arthur turned to his boy.

“Ronnie.” Ron looked up and saw his dad with slight tears in his eyes, “You’ve found your perfect person. I’m so happy for you, my boy.” Ron gave his dad a big hug and Arthur almost broke down then and there.

“What can I say, I know what a good match is after all.” Ron nudged his dad's side, “After all, I got to see how happy you and Mum were all this time. Gave me something to look forward to, y’know?” Arthur gave his son another hug.

The night progressed rather quickly after that. Soon enough it was two in the morning, and Ron and Hermione had flooed home. They were both dog tired after the events of the night and just wanted sleep. Ron had changed into his pajamas and laid on his side of the bed looking at the ceiling. He was remembering every little detail about his proposal, but he kept coming back to seeing Hermione’s eyes during his speech. They were the perfect shade of chocolate brown and he watched her eyes as they smiled at her new ring.

Hermione came in from the bathroom and sat down on her side of the bed. She snuggled up on Ron’s chest, her left hand resting on the other side of his torso. She looked at the ring again and her heart did flips at how perfect it was.

“So I have to ask,” She started, “How much of that went as planned?”

“Honestly? Pretty much exactly as I wanted it to.” She could hear the grin on his face without looking at him. “Didn’t expect you to find the ring, but after that, it went right as I wanted it to.”

“I'm so happy right now, Ron.” She sighed.

“Well good, It was my New Year’s resolution last year to make you happy and in typical Ron fashion I got it done… just a tad late is all.” Ron placed a hand against her back and she pressed against him closer.

“If that was last year’s then what is this year's?” She looked at him coyly.

“This year’s? Propose to you.” He laughed.

“Well, that job's done then, isn't it?!”

“Gotta be early for some things, right?” He ran his hands down her arms. “How about you? Any resolutions?”

“Marry the love of my life.” She kissed him deeply and tugged at his trousers. “And I fully intend to enjoy married life with him, as well.”

THE END

#2020 hpromione discord secret santa exchange #romione #ron weasley #hermione granger

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liquid-reign · 4 years ago

Text

Together We Bleed

Thomas Shelby x Arabella Roslyn Asheton (OC)

Warnings: Mentions of rough sex, mentions of drugs, hallucinations

I again the stole the title from a song. It's a phrase from Ghost - WILDES

A/N:- I'm not a writer. I just write when a particular scenario wouldn't leave my mind so the writing might not be very smooth or what is expected. The scenarios just have to be written, and that is why this exists.

Word Count- 2.1k according to Microsoft Word

She had a hundred questions in her mind. A hundred things she wanted to tell Ada but she waited. Till she came back from the kitchen, bringing them tea.

"So, what brings you here, Roslyn?"

Roslyn hesitated for a while, not being able to think how to put it forward. She was not used to this, having other women to talk to.

"Did- does Tommy come here often? Has he recently?"

"Actually he doesn't now as much as he used to."

Roslyn waited for her to continue, but she didn't.

"Have you seen him, in recent days?"

"Yes. I went to parliament with him to meet Mosley.", she shifted in her seat leaning a bit forward, "What is it?"

"If he took you to meet Mosley, then I think you already know what's wrong."

Ada decided she'd tell her, though she had promised herself that she won't tell anybody but the woman sitting in front of her was her brother's wife, not an outsider. "After we met him, he talked about someone taking his throne or something. Wanted me to make some calls"

Roslyn knew something was wrong and the worry for Thomas scared her. She wanted to tell Ada everything.

She became present in the room when Ada reached forward, laid a soft hand on her knee.

Roslyn couldn't keep sitting anymore so she stood up, her tea going cold. She suddenly craved cigarettes but refrained due to Ada carrying a baby.

She crossed the room to stand by the window for some fresh air, she felt suffocated.

"He isn't alright, Ada. There's something terribly wrong.", she took in a deep sharp breathe. Deciding to tell her. "He's consuming laudanum like one consumes water on an everyday basis. I know he hallucinates. G-", she choked on her next word, hardly able to say it. So she cleared her throat once, and tried again, "I think it's Grace"

She noticed Ada freeze and go still for a moment.

"Hardly ever sleeps, Ada. He's sinking, I can see it.", her knees wanted to give up as she felt her body going numb. Kept herself standing by leaning against the wall beside the window. "I can't let him.”

"Well, I booked him an appointment with a doctor but he won't go"

Both of them knew that Thomas Shelby wasn't one to go to doctors.

Suddenly, Roslyn picked her things up and walked towards the door.

"You can stay", Ada started, "I know how he can be"

She didn't turn too look at her sister-in-law, though she was tempted to take up the offer.

"I want to be there for him, Ada. Goodnight", and she left.

Tommy wasn't home for the rest of the night. It was a norm now but she didn't want to accept it now. She knew Tommy wasn't alright and just wanted him home. So she went to her office and phoned his offices. No one picked up. She didn't sleep for the rest of the night.

Tommy didn't come home for another two nights. Roslyn had tried to meet him at his London apartment, but no one answered the door. She had called his office and Lizzie had answered, though, telling her that he was in a meeting.

She took her clue. Knew he didn't want to be reached just yet. So she had waited for those two nights.

He did come home on the third night.

Roslyn was working in her study after putting Charlie to sleep when he walked in through the door and stood on the other side of the desk, both hands on the table, "Where did you keep it?"

She didn't look up from her work, "Keep what?"

He stood straight now, hands in the pockets of his coat, where no one could see them shivering. From rage? From the lack of sleep? From the lack of laudanum?

"Arabella?"

No. She won't let him play the first name card here.

"Threw it all away.", looking up at her husband now, sitting back in the chair.

She could see how tired he was. The features on his face gave it all away though he kept it expressionless. How much he wanted his little bottles of dope. To be with Grace? For comfort? For what? His eyes, though, were filled with a certain type of rage. She had seen this before, this rage. It showed when he didn't get the things he badly wanted.

He was clearly irritated, slowly nodded and fled the room. Roslyn knew he'd leave the house again. So she ran behind him to catch him before he reaches the main door.

"Tommy!" she yelled, "Thomas!" walking as fast as she could. Running when he was almost at the door, catching him from his arm just in time.

He freed his arm with force but didn't move towards the door, just stood there.

"Don't leave", she softly said, and moved towards him with slow calculated steps, as if one moves to calm a scared horse. His face gave away expressions that were a mix of being angry and tired. He didn't move. She reached him and hugged him lightly first. Taking a risk. Experimenting. When he didn't move away, she held him tighter. Embracing him as wholly and as tight as she could. She ran a hand through his hair, "Don't leave, Tommy. You don't need it. Okay? You don't need it.", she whispered in his ear. He was so still, she felt chills run down her spine. Buried her face in the crook of his neck, on the verge of tears, she "It's alright. It'll be alright.", she parted to take a look at his face, "Let's go to bed?", one arm around his neck, one hand on his cheek.

He finally moved. Took her by the hand, held tight with a lot of force, and took her upstairs to their shared bedroom, in a hurry that surprised her. But relieved at the fact that he wasn't leaving yet.

He shoved her into the bedroom and closed the door behind him. She almost stumbled by the force he did that, wrist starting to pain because of the strength it was held with.

Walking towards her, he let go of his coat and jacket. He wasn't wearing a cap today, it seemed. He crushed her lips with his. Hard, angry, forceful. A kiss that could leave bruises on both their lips. Like it was a war for him. His grip tight on her waist. He was using too much strength. Clearly agitated and in rage. She accepted the fact that whatever he did tonight would end up in bruises or cuts, but she decided she'd reply in less resistance. If this was how she could keep him away from consuming laudanum, then it was almost a negligible price to pay. She didn't want to be harsh with him tonight, she gave in.

His hands crushed her wherever they touched her.

The rage, the need reflected in how rough and urgent, but deep, his moves were. Paused and continued in his own accord. Depriving her of the freedom to let go again and again.

After riding out his high he loosened his grip on her gently, kissing her jaw and cheeks, nuzzling into her neck. He held on to her for sometime, kissing her now limp shoulders. He let her fall into the bed. Tommy crashed beside her.

She just lay there. In the position that the bed caught her in. Face away from Tommy, resting on her front. The tears had stopped but she felt weak. Her body felt liquid.

He stared at the ceiling for some time before the realisation, that his wife lay there as it is, dawned on him. Hated himself for being like that to her. Why had he? So his eyes shifted to her. Thankfully, she was beginning to move.

She lay there for a few minutes, not able to move as the bruises started making their presence evident. Reluctantly, she pulled herself up, to lay on her back. Now lying on her side, facing her husband who had just had with her the most rough consensual sex of her lifetime yet and found him staring at her.

His face was blank, but at least it didn't bear the anger and hurt it had sometime ago.

Tommy's right hand reached out to brush away the remainder of the tears from her cheek. A heavy air lingered between them, which none of them dared to break.

She moved closer to him and he welcomed her onto his arm. They lay there like that for sometime, before he spoke and woke her up from the almost slumber, "Why, Arabella?"

She hummed, shifted a little to look up at him, "Do you want to sleep?"

Before he could react, she sat up, her back resting against the back of the bed. "Come on", she whispered, patting her thighs.

He had protested the first time she had offered that to him some months ago. But, this time, he took the offer almost immediately.

One arm wrapped around her thighs, his breathing slowed into a relaxed rhythm. She ran a hand through his dark and soft hair and the other held his free hand. He clutched her hand tightly, entwining their fingers together.

The feeling of chilled, fresh cold air where his warmth had been, woke her up. A glimpse of him leaving the bedroom, dressed in his undershirt, pants and suspenders. She checked for the time. She had had an hour of sleep, then. It was almost dawn. Had Tommy slept at all?

She dreaded the thought of leaving him alone at this point so she left the room looking for him wearing only his overcoat, not wanting to waste time finding dresses. She didn't find him in the library. She wanted to search the entire house for him but it was a time waste right now. Everything was urgent, she didn't know why. He wouldn't be in the stables, she knew that. He didn't spend much time in there since Dangerous. So, she decided to look in her study, and in Charlie's room, which was on the way.

There he was. Sitting in her chair in her study, smoking.

The fire and lights weren't lit. The faint glow of the oncoming dawn lighting the room just enough to make out figures. The orange tip of his cigarette casting a heavenly glow on his face. His beauty never ceased to amaze her.

Tommy let her take the cigarette from his mouth and place herself on him. Her legs on either side of him. It was visible now, she just had his overcoat on. He couldn't bring himself to look at her face for reasons known to him.

He refused to look at her. She held his chin and guided his face upwards and kissed him before pressing her forehead to his.

"Did you sleep?", she whispered

His hands moved to hold her by the waist.

She parted to look at him, his eyes on her now. "Come back to bed, eh?" Tears were threatening to roll out of her eyes but she couldn't do that. Couldn't be weak. She hugged him, wrapping herself around him "Please", and kissed is neck.

Tommy hugged her back, tighter than she hoped he would. "I can't, Arabella"

"Tommy, look at me", she whispered.

He was staring at her like a lost puppy stares at someone who finds him.

"It's just in your head. The hallucinations. The suffering. Don't let it cloud anything."

She reached for his hands and held them together, "We can handle this, okay? I'm right here and we'll handle everything. Mosley, Billy Boys, Michael. Everything"

"You know"

Maybe if he'd be a bit specific, she thought.

"Know what?"

"She's so real"

Her mind and body froze.

"She's-", he hid his face in her chest, Wanted to melt in her warmth.

No words came out of her mouth. She was choking on her own words, knowing that everything she'll say will go in vain in that moment. So she held him. Running her fingers in his hair to calm him down.

It was absolute silence till she spoke again, as softly as she could, "Give up the opium. Please." He held her tighter. "Please, Tom"

She was almost sure that the little dampness she felt on her bare chest was her husband's tears. It broke her heart but she stayed there to let him cry. At least he showed some emotion and leaving him alone was not what she was going to do.

"It keeps me warm"

Silence

"Let me keep you warm", she whispered in his ear, kissing the spot just behind it.

Surprisingly, his grip on her loosened and he looked directly at her now. Present in the moment.

She pressed her forehead to his, cradling his face in her hands, "I'll keep you warm, Tom. I will. I promise" a tear finally escaped her eyes. It broke her seeing the man she loved in this condition.

"Just come back to bed for now. Please" merely a whisper.

Roslyn stood back up and extended a hand towards him, which he took after some hesitation.

I have no idea how to end this. I'll write one if it ever strikes my mind.

#tommy shelby #tommy shelby x oc #arabella roslyn asheton #peaky blinders #peaky blinder fanfic #thomas shelby #tommy shelby obe #thomas shelby obe

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fanficimagery · 5 years ago

Text

Can’t Help Falling In Love.

Relationship: Sam/Reader Words: 8.2K Warnings: I’m afraid Sam’s OOC. I tried, I really did.

Imagine being Bella’s older sister from a woman Charlie was with before Renee. You’re only staying with your dad now until you get back on your feet and had no intentions of looking for romance, but apparently Fate has other plans for you.

The taxi drops you off in front of a familiar two-story house, and after paying the taxi fee and collecting your two bags, you hesitantly walk towards the front of the house. A police cruiser sits in the driveway and it brings a small smile to your face as you cautiously walk up the iced porch steps. Then hesitantly knocking on the door, tears immediately spring to your eyes when Charlie opens the door and his eyes light up with excitement.

"Y/N!"

"Hi, dad." Charlie is quick to then envelop you in a hug, your bags falling at your feet so you can wrap your arms back around him in return. "I know you knew I was coming, but I'm sorry I didn't warn you I took an earlier flight."

"Don't apologize, kiddo. This is a good surprise. I'm happy you're finally here."

You and your dad continue to squeeze each other as tightly as you can before the cold finally gets to you, Charlie then releasing you to grab your bags himself and gesturing you inside. "Thanks for letting me come back home," you mumble. Charlie drops your bags on the couch before turning to face you once more. "I screwed up, dad, and you had every right to refuse me. I promise I'm going to get back on track. I won't let you down a second time."

He smiles fondly. "We all make mistakes, Y/N. I'm just glad you realized what yours were before it was too late."

"You and me both."

You glance around the room, gaze sweeping over the worn-in furniture and family portraits littering the walls. The house is a lot homier than you remember and you're grateful for it. You haven't had a place that felt like home since you left for college and you're anxious to finally settle down and get your life back on track.

"Bells, Nessie, and Edward should be here soon. I didn't tell her you were coming, but don't be surprised if she's not surprised you're here. In fact, don't be surprised if she shows up within the next few minutes as if she already knew you were here."

Your brow furrows. "Nessie?"

Charlie looks at you, surprised you don't know. "Yeah. Renesmee. Your niece?"

"I have a niece!?" Charlie's eyes widen and yours close as you pinch the bridge of your nose when he takes a beat to answer. "I have a niece and I didn't even know? I must have been really out of it."

"To be fair, Renesmee is Edward's niece they adopted after a tragic accident the girl's parents were in." You frown at your dad and he sighs. "It's weird. Trust me, I know," he chuckles. "There are some things you need to know, but can't know because it's not my place to tell you. What I can tell you, however, is that your sister has changed."

"Changed?"

"Apparently she contracted some very severe illness while on her honeymoon. She spent months recuperating and when Jacob came to tell me that Bella was better, he informed me that she had to change in order to be better. You'll see what I'm talking about when you see her, but please don't voice your thoughts aloud. It's weird for everyone involved when she gives you the speech about can't knowing for your safety."

"Jesus," you mumble. "What the hell did Bella get herself into?"

"All you need to know is that your sister is happy, your niece is adorable, and the Cullen's are really great people."

Your mouth opens to reply, but whatever you had to say just completely blips out of your mind. You sigh and your shoulders droop. "Yeah. Okay."

True to Charlie's prediction, the front door opens and Bella appears around the corner with windswept hair. Amber eyes widen before the most beautiful smile overtakes her features. "Y/N.."

"Hello, sister." Bella closes the gap between you, her body a little too firm and too cold. The oddity of her eyes flashes in your mind as you return her embrace, followed by Charlie's words, and you let it go after a brief thought. Something in your sister has changed, but she's here and she's happy, and that's all you've ever wanted for your little sister. "I'm sorry I missed your wedding."

"It's okay. You're here now."

When Bella finally releases you, behind her is probably one of the most gorgeous individuals you've ever laid eyes on and the cutest little girl who appears at least four or five perched on his hip. His eyes are the same color as your sister's, but again Charlie's words float into the forefront of your mind. Smiling shakily, you ask, "You must be Edward. Welcome to the family, brother-in-law."

He chuckles as he smiles and bounces the little girl in his arms. "It's nice to finally meet you." You nod, but when your gaze is drawn back to the girl once more, he asks, "Would you like to hold her?"

"Can I?" Your gaze darts between Bella and Edward, and both nod. You then hesitantly walk towards him and hold your hands out when Renesmee smiles at you, and you're surprised at how easily she goes from Edward's arms to yours. "Hello, little one," you coo as you perch her on your hip as Edward had her. "I'm your aunt Y/N."

Renesmee yawns and lays her head on your shoulder, and you twist up your mouth to keep sudden tears at bay. Edward chuckles and Bella stares, amused. "You alright there, Y/N?" Your sister asks.

"I've only known the little crotch goblin for two minutes and if someone ever raises their hand to her, I'll kill them."

All three adults laugh and you sway your niece as her body starts to go lax in your arms. Charlie suggests everyone take a seat and you do, moving Renesmee around in your arms so she's comfortable.

There's a brief bout of silence before Bella asks, "Where have you been? We used to keep in contact every week and then nothing, Y/N. What happened?"

Rubbing your cheek atop your niece's head, you then meet your sister's worried gaze. "I messed up, Bells. I.." With your throat suddenly feeling too tight, you trail off and gulp, and then clear your airway. "I got overwhelmed with school and work, and I- I messed up."

"You should have called," Bella says, frowning. "We would have helped you."

"I was so lost. I didn't know how to ask for help or anything without feeling so ashamed."

"What changed?" The question surprisingly comes from Edward.

"A couple of months ago it was like my mind just cleared. I was sober for the first time in a little over a year and when I realized just how much I had screwed everything up, I put aside my pride and called home. Dad made me settle some things with my school in order to take some time off, found me a 30 day rehab program to endure to make sure I had someone with me for the worst of the withdrawals, and then when I completed it, I asked if I could come back home to get back on my feet."

Edward nods in understanding. "For what it's worth, coming from a stranger and what not, you made the right decision. There are a lot of people in your shoes who choose not to seek help and continue on their destructive paths, but you- you're strong. I'm glad you came back. Now Renesmee gets to know another aunt and I get to know my sister-in-law."

Bella huffs a laugh. "Be careful what you wish for. Once Y/N gets comfortable with you, she's a pain in the butt."

You hiss. "Language, Isabella. Don't corrupt the sleepy little crotch goblin."

Charlie groans. "Can you please stop calling my grandchild a crotch goblin?"

"Sorry, dad."

The rest of the evening goes exceptionally well, and you quickly get over the glaringly obvious differences in your sister and her husband. While you are curious about them after your talk with your dad, you're just grateful that she nor Edward had judged you when they realized just how far you had fallen.

Edward, Renesmee, and Charlie had then leave to go grab some take-out while you catch up with Bella, and you apologize over and over for missing such a big day in her life. She assures you it's fine, but after admitting you're more upset at yourself because you had really wanted to be there, Bella comes up with the idea of holding another ceremony so you can be there this time around. You immediately refuse because you don't want her going through the trouble, but after a phone call from her sister-in-law Alice your sister assures you it's very do-able and that Alice was already making arrangements.

Charlie had chuckled when he heard his daughter was renewing her vows already and Edward looked quite scared that his sister was already in planning mode. The only condition Edward had, however, was that they give you a few months to settle down in Forks before the ceremony was to take place.

Bella, along with a reluctant Alice, agree.

In the couple of weeks that you've been home, Bella has only visited twice. You had expected she'd make more frequent trips given how excited she was now that you were home, but Charlie assured you it was the new norm when it came to his youngest. And though you felt let down, you ended up feeling quite content with all the texts and phone calls you shared with her.

"Hey, kid, what smells so good?"

You startle at Charlie's voice, setting the ladle back down into the pot you'd been stirring before grinning at your dad. "Beef stew. The cornbread is just about done, so go on and wash up."

"Sounds good." Charlie turns to walk away, but then turns back around. "Y/N, you remember Billy Black. Right?"

"Uh, yeah. Lives down on the Rez?"

"Right. The thing is Billy usually has a few caretakers, but tonight everyone seems to be busy. If it's not too much to ask, can you take him whatever leftovers we have?"

"Of course."

"Thanks, kiddo."

Dinner with Charlie is had in relative silence, the small talk being the bare minimum seeing as there was really nothing to talk about. Work for Charlie was his usual, boring day, and finding a school to transfer to near Forks in order to complete your nursing degree was proving quite tricky. However, there was an online course you could complete so long as you found a hospital willing to take you on to accumulate hours of experience.

"Well why don't you ask Carlisle to see if they do some stuff like that at Forks General?" Charlie asks when you're spooning the leftover stew into a large Tupperware bowl for Billy.

"Who's Carlisle?"

"Edward's father. He's the best doctor around."

"Huh." Your lips purse in thought. "I'll text Bella or even Alice to ask Carlisle then. I guess Bella gave her sister-in-law my number and that girl texts nonstop once you get her going."

Charlie chuckles. "Alice is a force to be reckoned with. She may be tiny, but she's terrifying."

"Tell me about it. I've never even met the girl and already she has several dresses for me to try on for Bella and Edward's second wedding."

"That sounds like something she'd do."

Clicking the lid onto the bowl of stew and then loading up another with the last of the cornbread, you gather both bowls in your arms. "So I guess I'm using Bella's old truck that she dropped off the other day?"

"Yep. Keys are hanging by the front door. And don't worry, Y/N. Bella's other sister-in-law Rosalie is a genius mechanic. She replaced everything in that truck and it now purrs like it's supposed to."

You laugh. "Got it. See you in a bit. Hopefully I don't get lost."

With the heat nearly on full blast and the radio playing classic rock on low, you drive down to La Push and take the somewhat familiar path to Billy Black's house. The sight of the red house with white trimming brings back vague memories from long ago and you park several feet from the wooden ramp leading up to the white door.

You know the house has seen better days, but it's a house that still brings a small smile to your face. The second the engine cuts, a group of shirtless men come from around the corner. You briefly hesitate, but gather the tupperware bowls in your arms and exit the truck.

"You're not Bella," are the first words that greet you.

"Nope. That would be my younger sister." You attempt to avoid gazes, quickly scanning their faces. With as quick as you look over them, not one face is familiar to you. However, you are a little suspicious of their matching tattoos and the fact they're shirtless in such cold temperatures. More weirdness, but this wasn't something Charlie had warned you about. Not like he did with your sister and her new family. "Is, uh, is Billy home? I come bearing food for him."

"Y/N?"

The guys before you seem to part as another one steps forward. You meet his dark eyes straight on and it's like a light bulb goes off over your head. "Jacob?" He smiles and you allow yourself a short laugh of disbelief. "No way. You're all grown up!"

"That does tend to happen as the years pass by."

"Shut up. I just- I'm surprised is all. You're not supposed to be taller than me." You then pout.

"Yeah, well.." Someone clears their throat and Jacob suddenly remembers that they have an audience. "Oh. Right. Y/N these are my friends Jared, Embry, Paul, and Sam. Guys, this is Y/N. She's Charlie Swan's first born."

You meet each and every one of their gazes now, nodding in greeting, but it's the last face- Sam?- that has you momentarily freezing. His expression seems to instantly drop when your gazes connect, but you're the first to collect yourself and look elsewhere. "Um, right." You drawl, suddenly finding it hard to keep your gaze from darting back to Sam. "So Billy?"

Everyone's gaze seems to be darting between you and Sam, smiles slowly forming into teasing smirks as they nudge and push their friend.

"Yeah, he's inside," Jacob says. "I'll just- lets go."

As Jacob leads you into his home, calling out his father's name, you can't help but ask, "So, Sam..?"

He chuckles. "First day back on the Rez and already you have a crush?"

"Shut up. I just- it was weird. Don't get me wrong, all your friends are oddly attractive, but Sam-"

"Was it love at first sight?" He teases.

"You might be taller than me, J, but I will sit on you and push your face into the sand like that one time." He leads you through his house and towards the kitchen, calling out for his dad once again. "And besides, he might be cute, but I'm not exactly in any position to attempt dating."

"No?"

"Not at all. Talk to your dad, I'm sure mine has already told him all the sordid details of my return."

Jacob opens his mouth to reply, but the appearance of Billy has him stalling. "Y/N! Charlie told me you'd be stopping by."

"Hello, Billy. I hope you're hungry."

Two days later is the next time you see Sam. Though Forks has its very own supermarket, the one down in La Push has cheaper prices for the same quality type of products. But not only that, La Push has always held a special place in heart since that's where your mother was born and you rather your money spent goes towards the smaller community.

So as you're pushing your cart down the aisles of La Push's supermarket, it's there you run into Sam. Literally, almost.

"Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry!" You say, choking down a laugh when Sam's immediate glare shifts into a smile upon seeing you. "I was too busy staring at the shelves rather than where I was walking."

"It's okay. Y/N, right? Charlie's daughter?"

"Yes. And you're Sam." He seems to stand a little taller upon you remembering who he was. "Almost didn't recognize you with a shirt on."

"Ha. Ha." Sam shifts his handheld basket from one hand to the other, his gaze then dropping to your half filled basket. "What brings you down to La Push? I'm pretty sure Forks has their own grocery store."

You shrug. "To be honest, if I had to choose between either La Push or Forks, La Push wins hands down. I love it here," you say while smiling. "From what I remember, everyone was close knit and content to just be. But everyone in Forks- everyone wants to be in each other's business just to have something to spread as the latest gossip. If I'm going to spend mine or my dad's money, I'm going to spend it where I know it'll go towards a community I adore."

Sam smiles at that. "I like your honesty."

"Mhm. Well I, uh, I should get back to shopping. I don't wanna hold you up anymore than I already have."

"If you say so. It was nice to run into you, Y/N."

"Yeah. You too, Sam."

The both of you share a look a little longer than necessary before he reluctantly walks away, and you finish your shopping excursion with a smile on your face. And given that Sam only had a handheld basket of groceries, you're surprised to see him get in line behind you. You'd figured he'd be done shopping long before you, but apparently that wasn't the case.

You then bid Sam another goodbye before you walk out of the store, only to groan and curse your luck moments later when you realize your truck has a flat tire.

"Sonnuvabitch." You already know there's no jack or spare tire anywhere in the truck, so your mood instantly takes a nosedive.

"I would make a joke right about now, but you seem honestly upset and I don't want to piss you off."

You huff a laugh. "You know, learning how to change a flat would come in handy right about now if I actually had a spare to change the flat out with." Glancing over your shoulder, you spot Sam grinning at you. "Today just isn't my day it seems."

"Need a hand?"

"Yes, but I don't want to rope you into this mess."

"Oh you're not roping next into anything," Sam muses. "I was just going to give you a lift after making a call to Paul and Jared. They can pick up the truck, fix the tire, and then deliver it to Charlie's for you."

You shake your head, amused. "Are you sure? I don't wanna step on toes."

"It's fine. They'll be glad to take some time off from their normal duties. Just leave your keys in the visor and you can follow me to my truck."

Grateful to not have to mess with the truck yourself, you place the truck keys in the visor and then reclaim your shopping basket to follow after Sam. He places a call to his guys, telling them the problem and where to leave the truck, and even helps you load your groceries into the bed of his own truck.

"Thanks for this, Sam. Really," you say after hopping into his passenger seat.

"Don't even worry about it. If you continue to shop in La Push rather than Forks, you'll be seeing a lot more of me."

He flashes you a smirk and you can't help but return it. The drive is relatively silent, but Sam somehow manages to sneak in a few questions to learn more about you without making you feel like a bug under a microscope. And by the time you pull up to your house, the two of you are laughing as he helps you grab all your bags from the bed of his truck to take inside.

Before you can even open the front door, however, Charlie is pulling it open.

"Y/N and.. Sam. This is a surprise."

"Hey, dad. Truck got a flat down in La Push and luckily for me Sam was there. His friends will be bringing the truck when they have time."

"Super."

You roll your eyes at Charlie's sarcasm, he then winking as Sam chuckles. "Chief, if you got a minute, I'd like to speak with you. Privately."

Sam seems to convey some sort of message with body language and expression, and Charlie stands a little taller. "Of course."

"Right," you then drawl, gaze darting between the two men. "I'll just get started on dinner while you two chat. And Sam? Thank you. I'm seriously going to have to make you and whatever boys help you some lunch one of these days as a proper thank you."

"Oh. You don't have to."

"I want to. Now stop refusing my kind gesture and talk to my dad about whatever it is you need to talk about."

You show Sam where he can drop the bags and then proceed to take everything to the kitchen yourself. You get the urge to eavesdrop when Sam closes the front door after Charlie's joined him outside, but decide against it and start prepping dinner as you said you would.

Charlie joins you some fifteen minutes later and you smile when you seem him studying you curiously. "What?"

"Nothing," he muses. Your eyes narrow as he takes a casual stance against the door jamb, arms crossing over his chest. "So Sam Uley, huh?"

"Don't."

"What? In all my years, I've never seen Sam smile the way he did earlier."

"He's just being friendly is all."

"If you say so."

"I do."

"Well whether he's friendly or has ulterior motives, I approve. Sam's a good guy."

Groaning, you can't help but chuckle. "Okay, dad. I'll keep that in mind."

Lunch with Sam, Jared, and Paul proved to be a rather delightful event. Sam had been nervous about something from the moment they showed up, and Paul and Jared made it their mission to tease him every chance they got. The homemade hamburgers and fries were a hit with the three of them, and they seemed to be relieved when you didn't comment on how much they ate.

From that day on it seemed like the flood gates had opened and the boys were dropping by more often than not, introducing you to the rest of their close knit group. Charlie found it all rather amusing, especially when the boys and Sam were comfortable enough to show up in nothing but a pair of jean shorts, and you found yourself welcoming the distraction no matter if Sam kept making you blush.

He visited frequently and it was on one of his late night visits that you found yourself truly opening up to him. Sam knew a bit about why you'd come back to Charlie's, but he didn't know the extent of all that you did or how much you struggled in and after rehab. He seemed alarmingly upset about your suffering all alone when you were away and then promised to be there should you ever feel yourself slipping into old habits. You were touched about how genuine he seemed that you found yourself hugging him before he went home.

And it was there, in Sam Uley's overly warm embrace, that you realized you were royally screwed.

Being back at Charlie's and finding a healthy rhythm lifts a weight off your shoulders. With Charlie now a constant in your life, as well as your sister who checks in every other day by calling or texting, it was a lot easier to remain on the straight and narrow while also making them proud. Even Sam had turned into a constant, and while you were grateful for his presence and friendship when Charlie was at work, you had to have the uncomfortable conversation with him that friendship was all that you could currently offer him when you took notice of his too fond expressions when he thought you weren't looking.

And Sam, being the gentle giant that he was, assured you he would take whatever you offered. Your refusal of whatever affections he might have held for you didn't seem to put a damper on his continuous pop-ups and you were secretly relieved.

Today, however, is a day that Charlie and Sam are going to be busy which means you'll be all alone for quite some time. So after quickly packing a bag of snacks, water, and a compass and a map, you decide to explore the woods behind your home. The beginning of the woods just behind your home is somewhat familiar, but the further you walk in, the more you realize you've never been this far out.

You manage to keep track of your whereabouts using the map, marking certain spots on it with a pencil. And around eleven you decide to take a break, sitting on a log near a meadow and eating some of the snacks you had packed.

Then just after you've packed your leftovers and are taking a sip from your water bottle, you see a figure standing just on the opposite side of the meadow. Swallowing your drink and capping off the bottle, you hesitantly stand and call out. "Hello? Are you lost or something, mister?"

Your eyesight isn't the best, but you do manage to make out the guy tilting his head in a curious manner. And the fact that he closes the distance between the both of you within the blink of an eye. Yelping, you step backwards and trip over the log you'd been sitting on.

The man with blood red eyes and too pale skin tuts mockingly at you while slowly crouching before you. "Such a fragile little thing. You should be more careful, darling."

Heart pounding furiously, you stare with wide, terrified eyes. "W-What are you?"

He smirks. "A living nightmare."

Faster than your gaze can keep track of, the man reaches out and grips your left forearm in a bone crushing grip. You scream as you feel your arm break and before you can even comprehend what's going on, you're airborne and then landing with a pained shout. Your vision is blurry with all the tears you're crying and you cradle your injured arm to your chest as you curl up on your side. Deep laughter resonates around the meadow and you scream when he grabs you by the shoulder to push you onto your back.

"Why are you doing this?" You sob.

His then red eyes are now pitch black. "Because, my dear, I'm absolutely starved." His top lip curls back as he hisses and he raises his arm to strike. Another sob breaks free and you clamp your eyes shut as to not see the killing blow.

But before he can strike, a heart stopping snarl seems to cease all noise in the meadow. Your eyes fly open to see the man now frozen above you, he staring at something across the meadow and out of your sight. You're too scared to look for what has the monster above you frozen scared, especially when wolf-like howls rip through the air. Everything is calm and quiet for a split second, and then a snarl to your right has your head whipping in that direction.

Faster than the monster above you can move, an overly large black wolf clamps his jaw around the monster's upper torso and rips him from you. You scream and try your best to roll away from the snarls, the screaming, and the howling. More wolves join the black wolf in a frenzy of ripping apart the man who was set on killing you and then the most beautiful sound reaches your ears.

"Y/N!"

Your heart freezes and you turn towards the voice. "S-Sam?" He jogs up to you, barefoot and wearing nothing but jean shorts, and a look of utter horror on his face. "Sam, you need to go. Run! There's this man and these wolves, and they- he.." you trail off, looking towards where the wolves last were. But only there are no wolves. Not anymore. Instead there stands Jared, Paul, Quil, and Embry- all barefoot, shirtless, and shielding their crotches in front of a roaring fire. "What's going on?" You then murmur.

Sam crouches next to you. "I'm sorry," he apologizes, expression pained. "I should have warned you sooner, but I didn't know how to tell you. This is all my fault."

"Tell me what?"

Suddenly torn about his mental musings, Sam gulps and shakes his head clear. "Not now. I need to get you to Carlisle Cullen. He can help me explain what it is that's happened here."

You frown. "Carlisle? What does my sister's father-in-law have to do with this?"

"Sam!" Paul suddenly calls out. "The leech has been contacted. He's expecting us."

You look at Sam for an answer yet again, but still he refuses. "Not now. Please bear with me, Y/N. It'll all be explained soon."

Everything in you is raging to demand answers now, but his expression breaks your heart. "O-okay."

Vampires. Vampires existed and one tried to eat you.

But not only that, shapeshifting werewolves were also a thing and you just so happened to be the soulmate- er, imprint- of one. But not just any werewolf. No. Life had to go and complicate things, and make you the soulmate to Sam. Which yeah, learning Sam was an alpha of one of the packs protecting Quileute lands? Total mind fuck. And while you were absolutely terrified of the one vampire who tried to make a snack out of you, you couldn't let that one experience paint your view of all vampires. Paul and Jared had tried to assure you that you should think all vampires were the enemy, but you couldn't believe that- not when your sister and her new family were vampires themselves. Vegetarian vampires, but vampires nonetheless.

You had then managed five days of no contact with Sam or the boys after the impromptu meeting put together by the Tribe leaders to properly explain the wolves' duties, and to be honest it was probably the most five miserable days you've experienced since rehab. You had texted with Sam as to not totally cut him out, but it just wasn't the same. So when Charlie took notice and expressed his concerns, you readily agreed to have Sam over so you could talk face to face.

Charlie's at work when Sam shows up and as soon as the door is open you're stepping into his space and wrapping your arms around his waist. With the side of your face pressed against his chest, you feel him exhale with relief before his arms wrap around your shoulders. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine." His voice sounds rough and you squeeze him a little tighter. "It's a lot to wrap your head around."

"Funny thing is I got over you being a wolf and the whole imprint thing days ago. It was the vampire part that left me questioning everything I knew and the fact that my doctor is a freakin' vampire."

Sam chuckles. "I'm not a fan of the leeches, but Doctor Carlisle has proven himself a friend of the packs. We trust him. Mostly."

Realizing the hug has lasted a little too long, you step back with a sheepish smile and gesture him inside. He follows you into the living room and you both take a seat on the couch, side by side. Then picking your feet up onto the cushions and wrapping your arms around bent knees as to not reach out to touch Sam, you say, "So I know we texted a bit about the whole imprint thing, but what exactly are you looking for with me?"

Sam inhales deeply as he rubs his hands along the tops of his thighs. "Whatever you want, Y/N. If you want to remain friends, we can. I'll just be that protective presence which would no doubt annoy you the first relationship you hop into." He says this with a smile, but you can see the forcefulness of it and it actually sends a pang a hurt through you.

"What if- what if I don't want to be just friends?" You ask. Swallowing thickly, you turn your head to meet Sam's wary expression. "What if I want more? Eventually, of course."

Sam actually blinks in surprise before a slow smile curls the corner of his lips. "If you want more, I'd be happy to offer you that too. We'll take things as slow as you need to."

"Thanks, Sam. It's just I'm still kind of-"

"Hey, hey," he shushes you politely, reaching out and tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. "You don't owe me an explanation. You're my imprint and the most important thing to me is your well being. I know what led you back here, so if you say you need to go slow, we'll go slow. I'm more than okay with that."

You take the time to really look at him and this time it's your turn to smile. "My dad's gonna be stoked, 'ya know? He's been singing your praises since you brought me home that first time when my truck had a flat. He's actually the one who made me realize I needed to call you over."

"I always knew I liked Charlie."

"Mhm." Letting your feet touch the ground once more, you grin. "So I know you've been here less than twenty minutes, but I need to go into vampire territory now." Sam tenses and you quietly huff. "Behave. Carlisle's gonna take a look at my arm and see how long I actually need to be in this stupid cast," you say while moving your broken arm to draw attention to it. "I don't want to be wearing this for my sister's second wedding. It'll clash with my dress."

"I know the Cullen's are some of the nicer bunch, but it still doesn't sit right with me that my imprint is walking into a leech lair."

"Then don't think of them as leeches. Think of them as my family because that's what they are. Well at least Edward is, but yeah. I talk mostly with Edward and Alice, and Carlisle and Esme are the most loving couple I've ever seen. You don't have anything to worry about."

"I know, but try telling that to my wolf."

"You can always go with me if that'll make you feel better."

"It would, but my patrol shift starts in less than ten."

"Then I go alone. I'll text you as soon as I'm back in my truck. Promise."

"That actually makes me feel a little bit better."

With nothing else left to say, you and Sam prepare to leave- you to the Cullen's and he back to La Push. After helping you into your jacket, Sam then makes sure you're actually capable of driving with a broken arm. And once knowing you are, he crowds into your space for yet another hug and a kiss to your hairline.

"You can come over tonight. Right?" You ask.

"Of course. Charlie grilling?"

"Yep. I'll see you later then."

"See you later."

The drive to Cullen territory has now become familiar to you and you get there in no time. Out on the front steps, Edward is waiting for you in all his sparkling glory since he knew it greatly amused you.

"Hey, Sparkles, how's it hanging?"

He chuckles at the nickname and steps back out of the sunlight. "Just fine. How are you, Y/N?"

"Honestly? I could be better. I don't like the cast."

"Well lucky for you the break wasn't too bad. Carlisle thinks you'll only have the cast for six weeks."

"God I hope so." You walk up the steps and let Edward lead you inside the home. "So where's my sister?"

"She and the rest of the girls took Nessie to shop for a flower girl dress. Emmett and Jasper are out hunting, so it'll only be Carlisle and I here with you."

"Your brothers don't have to leave when I come over," you say with a small huff. "I already explained to Sam that just because I'm his imprint I won't stop keeping company with your family. After all, you're my family now too."

Edward's brow raises in surprise. "And how did Sam react to that?"

"He growled," you muse, "but he tried to play it off. I told him to come with me now, but his patrol shift was about to start. And speaking of Sam," you then trail off as Carlisle appears with a smile, wheeling an x ray machine behind him, "is it okay to have him as my plus one for your second wedding?"

"Of course." You beam at Edward and he nods, gesturing towards the door. "I'll leave you and Carlisle to it then."

As Edward leaves, Carlisle gestures for you to take a seat where he's now set up. "For what it's worth, I think you'll be quite happy with Sam. He's a great man and protector."

"Carlisle, please stop hitting on my wolf." There's a snort from the other room and you grin. "So what am I looking at doc? Edward mentioned something about six weeks and then I'm free?"

"The severity of the break usually tells me how long you'll need to remain in a cast, and fortunately for you it wasn't too severe. Depending on how fast you heal, you should be out within six or seven weeks."

"Awesome." Then before Carlisle can comprehend what you're thinking or even doing, you touch the tip of your nose with your pointer finger. "Not it on telling Alice the wedding has to be pushed back another two weeks!"

Carlisle gapes and just then Edward rushes into the room, his finger on the tip of his nose as well. "Not it."

The Cullen patriarch glances between you and his first turned son, eyes rolling fondly. "We'll just get Jasper to break the news."

As the weeks progress, Charlie's house seems to become hangout central for Sam's pack. At first you thought your dad would be annoyed by the ever presence of shirtless young men parading around his house, but seeing as they provided money for groceries and seemed to fix whatever plumbing problem Charlie suddenly found, your dad was more than willing to put up with them. But not only that, Charlie now had a group of boys to watch and talk sports with, and you knew he was a lot happier than he led on.

Then the day before the wedding, your cast came off and Alice readily made calls to their cousins up in Alaska and sent out invitations to a select few others- Jacob, Billy, Seth, Charlie, Sue, yourself, and Sam. Others had been invited, but Jacob nor Sam felt comfortable leaving the borders free, so Leah, Embry, and Quil opted to remain on patrol rather than attend the wedding.

The morning of, you were whisked away by an apologetic Jasper and a grinning Emmett. You quickly texted Sam so he wouldn't panic and then left with boys. Alice did your makeup, Rosalie your hair, and Esme showed you to your dress while your sister laughed at your misfortune of being their doll this time around.

Alice reminds you that you'll be giving a speech as the bride's older sister and you momentarily panic. You had forgotten about the speech and have absolutely nothing planned.

"You can always sing a song," Edward muses while you pace what apparently used to be his bedroom. "Renee sang a song, but it was- it wasn't exactly the best."

You snort and then chuckle, your amusement slowly dwindling as you look at Edward in surprise. "Actually, that's not a bad idea. I'm not the best singer, but Bella and I used to love this one song.." You start humming, swaying slightly, hoping he'll know it. He does.

"Can't Help Falling in Love," he says with a faint grin. "Elvis Presley."

"Yes! I'll just- I need to find the music online. I doubt the band can play the version I want to sing. Is that okay?"

"Of course." You're brought a laptop and after finding the music to the song you want to sing, Edward quickly downloads it to have it prepared for after your speech.

Then as you're waiting for Sam to show up, you mentally practice singing the song in your head, praying you remember the lyrics correctly. But as you're singing, Sam keeps popping into your mind. You can't help but picture walking towards Sam at one point in the song, reaching out to him and letting the song help you tell him you're in love with him. You haven't told him you loved him, only relying on your actions so far, but the song is the perfect opportunity to finally say the words out loud.

"Do it." You startle at Edward's sudden appearance, brow furrowing. You almost forgot he could read minds. "I'm sure Sam would like to hear it."

"Yeah, but it's your wedding. Isn't it inappropriate for me to do that?"

"Not really. Bella and I have already had our day. Let us help you do this."

"If you say so."

"I do. Now go out front. I can hear Sam's truck coming up the driveway."

Sam shows up only slightly disgruntled, tie hanging loosely around his neck and suit jacket left unbuttoned. You whistle at him and he glares up until he realizes it's you. You laugh. "Rough day?"

"Something like that." Sam stops just at the bottom of the steps, staring up at you and taking in the dark green dress hanging off your frame. "You look beautiful."

"Thanks. You clean up nice yourself." As Sam joins you on the step you're standing on, he reaches out to bring you into his arms. You settle in his embrace after kissing his cheek in greeting, arms wrapped low around his waist. "By the way, I have to give a speech so don't start growling when I eventually leave your side."

He sighs. "At least the only leeches invited are all vegetarians."

"Shush," you huff a quiet laugh. "Don't call them that when they're in hearing distance."

"Vegetarians?"

Pulling back, you playfully swat at him. "You know which word I mean. Stupid doesn't suit you."

Sam smiles before taking your hand in his own, he then heading towards the front door. "I apologize. Some habits are harder to break."

"I know. At least you're trying though."

- X - X - X - X - X -

The wedding itself is very beautiful and you're shocked at how quickly the backyard was transformed into the perfect wedding venue. Even Sam seemed surprised and Charlie took great amusement in your awed expression, but not as much amusement as you shared when you realized Charlie was hiding his girlfriend from you right under your nose. Sue Clearwater was a soft spoken woman with a hidden fiery attitude, and she was the perfect woman for your father.

The ceremony itself is rather quick given they were already married and then everyone is moved to yet another part of Cullen property where a newly installed dance floor is covered with a tent of white flowers.

The wedded couple have their first dance all over again, with the addition of their daughter, and then Alice is up on stage and calling you up to give a speech. Sam fidgets in his seat, but after grabbing his hand and giving him a reassuring squeeze, he calms and releases you to perform your sisterly duty.

Then stepping up to the microphone once on stage, you nervously chuckle as all eyes are on you. "First of all, I just want to thank the Cullen's for making Edward and Bella have a second wedding since I missed their first one." Alice preens as the rest of her family throw a mock glare in her direction and the rest of the guests all express their amusement. "So as you all probably know by now, I am Bella's older sister. Unfortunately I have no embarrassing stories to tell since we only got to see each other when we spent summers together when we visited our dad-" Emmett boos and you laugh, "but I can tell you what I thought when I first heard she was marrying the kid she dated since her junior year of high school."

"Oh this oughta be good," you hear Emmett chortle.

"I remember- I remember my sister calling me in tears one day. She asked me if she smelt bad and I laughed, but through her tears she told me that this boy at school acted as if she were the most awful smelling individual he'd ever come across and that he actually tried switching out of their shared classes."

"I apologized!"

"I know you did, Sparkles, and I've already forgiven you." The small crowd chuckles. "But then a week later my sister was singing a different tune. Edward was suddenly the most amazing person ever and she was passed smitten, already claiming to be in love with him. I thought she was being utterly ridiculous and that her hormones were getting the best of her for the first time, but she assured me that wasn't the case. Well," you trail off, grinning, "she did tell me, repeatedly might I add, that she wanted to jump-"

"Not another word!"

Grinning deviously, you hold your hands up in mock surrender as your dad groans and everyone else looks rather amused at Bella's panic. Emmett and Jasper are urging you to continue, but you know she'll only release something embarrassing about you if you do. Instead, you start walking towards the laptop that Edward set up for you which is already connected to the speakers around the area. All you have to do is press play. "So now that I know how perfect Edward is for my sister, I don't feel bad for my early assessment of thinking them fools in love. And speaking of fools," you press play, letting the chords of a guitar play an all too familiar tune, "I thought I'd sing a little something for them. And don't worry, I'm not as terrible a singer as Bella's mother."

More laughter rings out and you unhook the microphone from its stand. It's a wireless one, so you're free to walk around the stage. Then finding your spot near the edge of the stage, you nod at Edward who readily takes your sister's hand in his and leads her to the middle of the dance floor. Bella is grinning and you breathe a little easier, inhaling deeply just in time to sing.

"Wise men say only fools rush in, but I can't help falling in love with you." You sing it slow and a little raspy, and you mentally applaud yourself when you see the small crowd all perk up in surprise. "Shall I stay? Would it be a sin if I can't help falling in love with you."

More couples join Edward and Bella on the floor, half lovingly staring into each other's eyes as you sing while others watch you. "Like a river flows surely to the sea. Darling so it goes, some things are meant to be…"

The music trails off, the lights dim only to be replaced by twinkling fairy lights entwined with the flowers, and as you step off the stage the crowd parts which leaves you a straight shot to Sam who's staring at you in wonder. Jacob and Seth, who'd sat with you at your table, gleefully nudge Sam into standing when they realize what you're doing.

You walk towards Sam and Bella squeezes your shoulder in support as you pass her by. "So take my hand," you grab his hand, smiling through tears as you pull him into your space, "take my whole life too for I can't help falling in love with you. For I can't help falling in love with you."

As the song ends, everyone applauds. There's whistling and whoops of cheer, and you briefly turn around to bow and thank everyone. Alice takes the microphone from you to direct the attention back on her and you feel a tug on your hand once everyone else is distracted. Sam gestures to the side and you follow him out of sight.

"You planned that," he eventually says.

Gulping nervously, you shrug. "I did. I just- it popped into my head right before you got here and Edward helped me quickly put it together."

"Do you mean it? You love me?"

"Sam.." You reach up to cup the side of his face, bringing his gaze down to yours. "I would never say those words- well, sing it in this case- without meaning them. You have been patient with me, and kind, and I- I fell in love." You chuckle, sniffling. "I love you, Sam, and I'm sorry I'm so awkward and told you in front of every-"

Sam immediately leans down, pressing his lips against yours. You smile, returning his kiss, and just breath him in when he then rests his forehead against yours. "Good. Because I love you too."

AN: If you want to hear how the song was sung, Youtube: Can’t Help Falling in Love by Kina Grannis. It’s the version of the song that’s in the movie Crazy Rich Asians. Watching that movie actually inspired this. Haha.

#fanficimagery #imagine #sam uley x reader #sam uley imagine #twilight imagine #new moon imagine #eclipse imagine #breaking dawn imagine #sam uley #bella swan #charlie swan #edward cullen #carlisle cullen #twilight #new moon #eclipse #breaking dawn

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doctoraliceharvey · 4 years ago

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hey, could you write malice where matthew gets angry (not necessarily with her but in general) and how alice deals with this because it’s been implied before that she can’t deal with shouting?

uuuuh this got long, but I hope you enjoy it and I really enjoyed exploring this entire aspect of Matthew and Alice.

it's of a different fic (and felt like it took me forever to actually write it), but honestly the idea of actually exploring a little of WHY Matthew yells and how that could affect a potential relationship with Alice was too interesting to pass up. The working title of this fic was "Matthew Goes to Therapy" and honestly most characters on this show probably should, but I'm very proud of Matthew actually sitting down with his feelings and anger and dealing with them. Please enjoy! - Dee

tw: mentions of abuse

Flowers In The Darkest Part of My Mind

AO3 | FF.NET

-----

"What brought you here?"

Matthew sighed as he shifted on the couch; it was a comfortable couch and Matthew had gotten to know it over the past few weeks of coming to Dr. Graves, but at his question, suddenly Matthew felt like he had at the beginning: out of place.

"Matthew?"

Glancing over at the doctor - a tall, quiet man about Matthew's age with his dark grey hair starting to go white - Matthew sighed again.

"There was… an incident."

"What sort of incident?"

"One of the constables - a little green around the gills, no fault of his own - messed up on a case and it happened that I was… stressed out that day. I'd been stressed quite a bit before this incident, but this was the day it all just kind of… blew up. A… friend and colleague overheard the yelling and… she pulled away from me because of it. Alice… I won't say much because I also don't know much, but she… didn't have a happy childhood and I'd seen the way she was like when someone raised their voice or moved too quickly towards her."

"Ah," Dr. Graves nodded as he jotted down a few notes. "So, Alice pulled away?"

"Yes, she stopped coming by the house for dinner, stopped bantering with me at work, only doing the bare minimum in interacting with me or the police, so… after talking with Jean - who knows a lot more of Alice's past - I realized Alice was afraid of me… of my anger."

"And that's not something you want?"

Matthew shook his head, "I don't think it's something I've wanted for a long time. Besides scaring Alice, who's a close friend… I'm just tired of being so angry for so long. Angry at my father, angry at my past, angry at Lucien, angry at the higher ups, angry at the world… God, I'm just so tired."

"Hm, interesting."

He liked Dr. Graves; the psychologist never pushed and had a sort of eclectic way of looking at the world - it almost was like he'd found another "Alice" and found it easy to talk to the man, regardless if he'd been nervous at first.

The way Alice had looked at him after running into him in the hallway once he'd been through with carpeting the constable, the way her eyes were wide, scared, and how she'd stepped back from him - flinched, really - confused him; they'd gotten through so much and had started to fall back into the friendship both enjoyed prior to Lucien going missing, that her pulling back so suddenly frustrated him.

It wasn't until Alice didn't show up for dinner a few nights in a row, that he finally turned to Jean for her input.

"You remember the day you were reaming out the constable?" She'd asked him quietly as the tea steeped between them.

"I do."

"You weren't in the bullpen with us, but… Alice was shaking."

"Shaking?"

"Yes, she'd come by to drop off a report and was chatting with me and Peter when you started in; I nearly thought she would faint dead right then and there."

He couldn't picture Alice close to fainting, but Jean looked serious.

"She couldn't hide the way her hands shook or the paleness of her cheeks, so I told her to go outside for fresh air."

"I ran into her on her way out, and she flinched from me, Jean. She's… she's never done that before even before we really knew each other."

"But you don't know each other, not… I mean, you're close, but there's still so much you don't know about Alice and things she doesn't know about your past."

Matthew pulled at his hair as he ran a hand through it; letting out a frustrated sigh, he watched Jean pour them tea.

"What am I missing, Jean? I don't… I don't want it to be like this, I… I miss her."

Jean continued to pour the tea and fix their cups to their liking - staying quiet for a long time (and Jean could draw out her silences when she liked to) before she took a sip and sighed.

"I think… I think Alice was startled and got scared… by your anger, Matthew."

"My anger?"

"The yelling."

Scrubbing his face with his hand, Matthew frowned, "But… why?"

"That's probably for Alice to tell you, but… from what I can tell she didn't have an easy childhood. Lucien and Charlie once mentioned she'd told a suspect that she 'didn't need protecting since she was twelve years old'... I'll let you speculate as to why."

Matthew sighed, a tired, weary sigh, and leaned his head in his hand; he'd seen enough children abused by their parents to hazard a guess (hell, he'd been through some with his father), and the flinching, the startled, almost deer-in-headlights look Alice got when she'd overheard his yelling started to make a little more sense.

"Oh, Christ."

Jean hummed and pushed his tea towards him, "So… I suppose to fix this… you might need to do some thinking and reflecting."

At that he huffed a silent laugh, "Thinking never helped me get anywhere… just leads me in circles."

"Then maybe you need someone to help guide you… your brother-in-law works in the field of psychology, does he not?"

"Yeah, but I don't think I could tell him all about this… I know there are things that Vera never told him about our past and I don't want to drive a wedge between them. Vera's moved on as much as she could."

"Then see if he has a friend or colleague who might be open to new patients."

Matthew sighed again as Jean patted his hand and he stared off into space as he mechanically sipped at his tea - not really tasting it as Jean started on cleaning up the kitchen post-dinner. Would he really do this? Could he really do this? Go and talk to a stranger about… well, everything?

If he didn't, would he lose Alice?

And so, here he was, a few weeks later after a few days of self-reflection and knowing something needed to drastically change in order for his world to right itself; Matthew reached out to his brother-in-law, Daniel Anderson, and found someone to help him figure out where to go from there.

Doctor Maxwell Graves was certainly an interesting choice, but Matthew liked how he made him feel at ease even when asking deeply probing questions about his past, his father - everything, really. Through the psychologist, Matthew was able to take the demons of his past and shrink them down into more manageable battles; he gave Matthew new tools to work with - a journal, counting to himself when he found his anger rising, breathing exercises - and never judged Matthew if he fell a little behind or had to reschedule. The practice he ran with his wife - also a psychologist who tended to see the women of the practice, and specialized in victims of abuse - had become a place of comfort to Matthew in the weeks since his last outburst.

"Matthew?"

"Hm?" Matthew felt his cheeks grow warm, realizing he'd drifted off into his thoughts for far too long.

"What were you thinking of?"

"Just… just how much everything's gotten better since I started coming to see you, Doc."

At that, Dr. Graves smiled. "I'm glad to hear it, and I think that I've finally figured out the source of all of this."

"Really?" Matthew sat up slightly to make eye contact with the doctor. "What is it?"

"I don't think your anger is actually anger, I think it's grief."

"Grief?" That wasn't what Matthew was expecting to hear at all.

"Mm-hm," his psychologist nodded. "I think it's grief that you never let yourself feel; grief for your childhood, grief for your father, grief for your friend, Lucien. It comes out as anger, but I think you're lashing out from a place of sadness and hurt."

"I understand that part, but… I also get angry when things are unfair… is that also grief?"

"In a way, it's grief stemming from your immense capacity for empathy; you're sad - and angry - at the world because you genuinely wish it could be a better place and through all you've seen at work it feels like you haven't made a difference at all. You get stuck on all the things that haven't changed, all the good that hasn't been done instead of the good impact you've had, that it builds up and lashes out on unsuspecting constables."

Matthew chuckled, "I suppose that makes sense… does that change anything?"

"Not really," Dr. Graves smiled. "Same sort of coping mechanisms, but also allow yourself to feel everything… don't hold back if you need to grieve or cry or whatever when a case gets to you, or something happens in your life; and of course I'll be here for you to talk to - in person or over the phone if it's particularly bad."

"Hm…"

"I know it sounds very simple, and also goes against everything you've been told growing up about how to be a man, but allowing yourself to feel is a lot harder than it sounds. It takes quite a bit of bravery, but I assure you it'll be better for you, your emotions, and your relationships in the long run."

"I'll try, Doc."

Dr. Graves patted his shoulder, "That's all I ever ask, Matthew. Now, continue your journaling, work on the breathing exercises, and allow yourself to truly feel something this week besides frustration or anger."

Matthew snorted a laugh, but shook Dr. Graves' hand as he stood. "Thanks, Doc. I should get back to Ballarat."

"Have a safe trip, and, Matthew?"

"Yeah?"

"I would tell your Alice about all of this… it sounds like you really care for her and I think she should know the effort you've been making to deal with your anger."

Matthew nodded and headed out of Dr. Graves office with a lighter heart. It was still hard work to confront his past and unlearning old habits, but he deserved better.

(And so did everyone around him)

-----

Alice felt lost; this wasn't the first time (nor the last time), but this time she felt it much more keenly than before. It all started with a letter.

She didn't know how they'd found her; she'd left that life long ago - as well as her sister - and wanted nothing to do with her parents. Alice battled with the urge to read the letter or to simply throw it in the fireplace - the very sight of the return address bringing up memories that were never far from her nightmares. They affected her sleep, which affected how she came across to people, and Alice could tell Jean was starting to notice, when that fateful day in the station happened.

Her emotions were already holding on by a tightly wound string, and to hear Matthew yelling in that way had violently shook her to the core; his voice morphed into that of her father's - the letter still burning an image in her mind - and Alice tried to hide the way her knees suddenly grew weak and threatened to give out underneath her.

"Alice?"

"I'm fine," she'd tried to smile - to reassure both Jean and Peter.

"You're as white as a sheet, let's get you out for some air, hm?"

Flinching just a little away from her friend's grasp, Alice shook her head, "I… I can find it on my own, thank you."

All but running from the bullpen, and away from the questions that would arise if she stayed any longer, Alice gasped when she nearly ran into Matthew.

"Alice?" he reached for her and she flinched away - her mind not knowing the difference between him and her father, all it urged her to do was to get out of the building, to run to where it was safe.

'Matthew is safe though,' she tried to tell herself, but his sudden outburst of anger scared her.

Shaking her head with a faint apology and fighting tears, Alice tore out of the station and back to the hospital - trying to calm herself down in the process.

She knew Matthew got angry when things were unfair, and that he had to keep a strict hand on the station lest it got out of control, but… she'd never quite heard or seen him this way. He got short, yes, or abrupt, but not like this; the closest he'd come was when he'd snapped at Jean outside the morgue - she'd been more annoyed with his treatment of their mutual friend than scared, and still felt safe around him, knowing he was different than the men of her past.

But would he be safe now after this? Would he get angry again, and angry at her? Could she risk her heart like that?

Alice sighed and leaned back on her couch - no closer to answers than she had been weeks ago. Against her wants and wishes, Alice drew back from Matthew - not going around for dinner with him and Jean, no lingering conversations or looks in the morgue or station, and mainly going through the motions she had to for her job. It hurt; she missed Matthew, but she couldn't risk all the progress she'd made in her life to be around someone who got angry like that.

But has it really been progress? Has she really been getting over her past? Or was she still running from it like she had when twelve years old?

Eyeing the letter on her coffee table - still unopened - Alice felt so damn lost… and desperately wished someone was here to help guide her through it all.

The sound of her doorbell jarred Alice from her thoughts and she leapt to her feet - trying to calm the rapid beat of her heart as she wiped her sudden clammy palms on her robe and went to see who'd come around to her little bungalow. Peering through the peephole, Alice bit her lower lip when she saw Matthew standing there.

'Why is he here?' she thought, even as she slowly unlocked the door and peered out through a crack.

"Hi," he gave her a slight, nervous, smile. "Uh… I hear it's your birthday today, and I didn't want you to think I forgot."

Honestly she'd forgotten about her own birthday - most people did, at least until she'd come to Ballarat. The sight of the small bouquet of daisies (he'd remembered her preference for them over other more… obviously romantic flowers usually picked), and a gift bag in his hand nearly made her start crying.

"I, um, I understand if you don't want me to linger or come in, or even if you don't want to accept the gift, Alice," Matthew cleared his throat and continued. "But I want you to know… that I've been working on my anger, and the yelling, and the… overall grumpiness. That's… that's what I've been doing this past few weeks when you pulled back, and I don't blame you at all. I don't think I've been happy with myself for quite some time, and… well, I'm getting help - professional help - with all of it."

At that, Alice opened the door further and silently stepped up to Matthew; sliding her arms around his shoulders, she buried her face in the crook of his neck - smiling when she felt him hesitate before pulling her closer.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"You're welcome."

Drawing back from the spontaneous hug, Alice wiped at the tears falling and waved him in.

"You're sure?"

Smiling at the way he shifted his weight like a schoolboy about to be scolded, Alice nodded; Matthew stepped into her home, watching her quietly as she closed the door behind him. Knotting her fingers in front of her, Alice shuffled nervously next to him.

"I… I've missed you," she admitted in the uneasy silence between them.

That got her a shy smile, "I missed you too."

"Tea?" She motioned further into her home and led him to the kitchen; it felt… right to have him here - sitting silently at her table as she bustled around readying a brew for two. Alice hadn't realized just how much she'd missed him until that moment; he had always made her feel comfortable (he shared a silence with her the same way Lucien always made her at ease by filling up the air with words and pulling her out of her shell).

"Still white with two?" she asked him.

"Yeah, you still take honey in yours?"

"Yeah," Alice smiled over her shoulder as the kettle boiled.

"Why honey?"

"It's what Mum had on hand most of the time… cheaper than sugar since one of our neighbors had a hive."

"Really? I didn't know that."

"Oh, the other neighbors hated it, but since it was up on the roof, they couldn't complain much," Alice shrugged. "At least we got free honey."

Matthew's faint chuckle warmed her heart as she brought over the steaming cups; watching him blow gently on his before taking a sip and (predictably) burning his tongue a little, Alice smiled as the warmth in her chest rose - she'd missed him.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Why?"

"For… for pulling away."

"Don't be," Matthew reached out a hand and squeezed hers when she met him halfway. "Don't be, Alice. If you hadn't… I probably wouldn't have gone to get help."

"What do you mean?"

"I wondered why you pulled away, why you hadn't come by for dinner, and Jean finally sat me down and told me you'd gotten scared of my… yelling, my anger."

Alice squeezed his hand as he drew in a deep breath.

"And… as awful as it was not having you around, I'm grateful for it… it pushed me to get help and I can't express enough of how much better I feel for it. I'm… I'm sorry it took something like what happened in the bullpen to have me look for help, but…"

"You're still grateful for it, I understand."

"And… I want to tell you about why I tend to yell."

She could feel the way his hands started to shake in hers, and saw the nervous tick of him chewing on his inner lip; she'd never seen him this nervous, not even when he'd bucked up the courage to ask her out to dinner that first time.

(How she hated to have to let him down gently, as much as she wanted to finally go forward in their dance)

"Okay," Alice nodded. "Okay, yeah, do you want to stay here and tell me or move to somewhere more comfortable? How's your le-?"

"Alice, sweetheart," Matthew smiled, cutting off her concerned questions, and her stomach fluttered a little at the term of endearment.

"Anywhere is fine, I just… it's harder to talk about this than I thought, which is stupid because I just talked about it all with Dr. Graves."

"It's not stupid, it's not."

Matthew shifted in his seat and sighed, "It still feels stupid."

"It's not," she squeezed his hands. "I know how hard it can be to admit these things to people you care about because you don't want things to change… or how they view you to change. How about we move to the couch and maybe that'll help you figure out what you want to say?"

"Okay," he nodded.

Alice made new, fresh cups of tea for both of them as Matthew shuffled out of the kitchen to the couch; as she brought the mugs in, she saw him eyeing the letter still on her coffee table.

"Not a fan of opening your mail?"

"Not overly fond of mail from Sydney… I'll tell you after you get whatever it is off your chest, that's what you came for after all."

He nodded and smiled when she handed over the fresh cup of tea. It all came out - slowly, and frequently punctuated with long silences as Matthew worked out what he wanted to say; she had no idea what a brute his father had been, and how similar their childhoods were. Matthew's father was more emotionally distant - with somewhat violent drunken outbursts - and tended to gamble things and money away rather than beat the living daylights out of Matthew, and Alice wondered if it was because Matthew started fighting back once he got older and stronger than Alice had been - ultimately more of a coward than her own father.

Matthew's upbringing along with the bullying he'd faced at the hands of McAvoy (no wonder he'd been so stressed during the Ballarat West case) shed light on his overall grumpiness and anger - it had all been a wall, a way to separate himself from the world, from getting attached because his heart felt too much. Alice squeezed his hands - their tea cups abandoned on the table, cooled and forgotten - as he went into all that the doctor had told him about how his anger was actually his grief manifesting from a place of hurt.

"Now that you know, what is he having you do to help?"

"I have a journal," Matthew smiled - their joined hands on his good knee. "Dr. Graves has me write down something good each day - even if it's just as simple as 'I had a really good cup of tea', and that way I can look back on the week and see how much good really is in my life, so I don't lose focus of that when work gets to be a lot."

"Good, I'm glad."

"Me too," his smile widened and he wiped away the lingering tears he'd shed earlier; Alice leaned over and kissed his cheek as she hugged him.

"I'm so proud of you."

Matthew sniffled some - clearing his throat in a way that told Alice he was trying not to cry again - but he held tight to Alice and she felt her shoulder grow a little damp.

"I'm so proud of you," she told him again as he drew back to wipe his tears.

"Thank you, sweetheart."

Alice felt her cheeks warm as he softly kissed one; Matthew smiled when she immediately reached for his hand while he took a little time to recover.

"Now, uh," he cleared his throat, "what about Sydney mail hits you the wrong way?"

"Where to start," she sighed, but with Matthew's hand tight around hers, she drew the strength to tell him of her past.

She wasn't quite sure what to make of the shining look in Matthew's eyes - not pitying like some had done - as he remained silent throughout her tale (exactly like she had in his - squeezing her hands reassuringly whenever her throat closed around her words), but she greatly appreciated finally telling someone the whole sad, sorry lot she'd received in life. Finally, Matthew would understand why she was so touch-averse from people she didn't trust. Finally, he'd understand why any type of raised voice could set her on edge. And finally, he'd understand why it took her so long to open up to anyone (and how Lucien had done that by simply accepting Alice for herself - no expectations, no restrictions, just pure acceptance of her as a doctor and her as a friend).

"Oh, Alice," he gently pulled her in for a hug. "I'm so sorry you ever had to go through that, and I'm proud of you."

Alice held on tight to him - taking comfort in his solid, steady warmth - and though the tears fell, she felt so relieved to finally get it out in the open; she was no longer running from her past - not quite confronting it, but willing to stop and walk with it instead of away from it.

"The yelling and the anger on my part… was that another reason you were so hesitant about… us?"

"I… I think so."

"Then I'm definitely glad I went and got help. I know, I know, I shouldn't want to change for the hope of a relationship, sweetheart, but I also wanted to change for myself and you're worth changing for."

Alice simply held him tighter - not knowing what to say, but it did give her a little bit of hope that maybe their dance could resume.

"So… are you worried that your parents have finally found you with this letter from Sydney?"

"Yeah," she wiped her eyes.

"Want me to open it for you and then you can read it?"

"Oh, would you? I-I don't know if I could ever buck up the courage to."

Matthew kissed her forehead and leaned forward to pick up the letter; the address of her parents' house glared up at Alice as she leaned her head on Matthew's shoulder - though she didn't recognize the handwriting. He gently ripped the envelope open and pulled out the letter.

"Can…" she sighed when he held it out, "Can you read it? Out loud, please?"

"Yeah, I can," he kissed her forehead again.

"Dear Alice," the letter began, "I know this letter might come as a shock, or completely unwanted, but I hope you've decided to open it and find out. It took awhile to track you down, but Father's lawyer finally did, and I'm writing to tell you that Father is dead. Mum's still alive, and I'm taking care of her as she deals with both her grief and relief over the fact that she's out from under his abusive thumb. I'm also writing to tell you that I never hated you for leaving, my dear sister. You got out when you could, and I was thankfully shielded from Father's abuse by Mum, who didn't want to lose her other daughter. You made your choice to leave, and I made my choice to stay after I got older, and I just… I wanted you to know that both Mum and I worried after you. I hope you reach out to us again now that Father's gone, I'd love to introduce you to your niece - she reminds me so much of you every day. Yours, Peg."

"Oh…" Alice covered her mouth with her hand as she gently took the letter from Matthew's hand - more tears springing up in her eyes as she poured over the slanting handwriting of her baby sister - so very different from when they were young.

"Oh, Matthew…"

"Seems like good news, hm?"

"I… I don't know."

He kissed her temple as she stared at the letter, "Well… your father's dead, and it sounds like your sister and Mum miss you."

"What if it's a trick?"

"There's one way to find out," he pointed to the phone number written down at the bottom. "If it is a trick, you've still got me and Jean and the whole of Ballarat's police force to help protect you. We'll do whatever we need to do."

That did make her feel better; she had a family here in Ballarat - one unlike she'd ever had before, and she felt more confident that she could confront any negative consequences from reaching out to her family.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

She nodded, "Okay. I want to call and find out."

"How about tomorrow, it's getting a little late."

Alice looked down at Matthew's watch and giggled at the late hour.

"Might have to sneak out of here, but first, you have a gift to open."

"I completely forgot."

"Sit tight, I'll get the gift," with another kiss to her forehead, Matthew got up with a slight groan and quickly retrieved the bag he'd brought in.

"Happy Birthday, Alice."

She peered into the bag and giggled at the familiar sight of Jean's biscuit tin. "Did you nick Jean's biscuits, my dear Matthew?"

"No!" He protested even as she laughed. "No, no, no, it was all that was on hand to hold your present. As if Jean would let me nick her tin anyways."

Alice continued to laugh and opened the tin - inhaling the scent of baked shortbread drizzled in chocolate; they weren't perfect, some of the pieces were a little wonky, but when she pulled one out to sample they were just as delicious as Jean's usual shortbread (and the added chocolate made her want to eat the entire tin in one go).

Matthew cleared his throat again, "Sorry some of them look weird, I'm not as skilled as Jean is in the kitchen - though she did hover over my shoulder while I made them."

"You made these?"

His cheeks turned pink (as did his ears), but he nodded, "I, uh, I wanted to give you something a little special, but not too over the top."

"It's perfect, Matthew," Alice leaned over and hugged him - the tin still in her hands as her friend laughed. "Thank you, I love it."

"Good," he kissed the top of her head as she lingered in his arms, "I'm glad."

"And I'm glad you've gotten help, and that you've trusted me with everything."

"Just as I am with you trusting me with your past."

She hummed a little happy hum before kissing Matthew's cheek as she drew back from the hug; he smiled at her - his hand coming up to trail over her cheek - it widened when she leaned into his touch.

"It's getting late," Matthew told her softly.

"It is… you'll come back tomorrow?"

"Yeah, or you could come over to the house - have some privacy in the studio before staying for dinner."

"Is this your way of asking me over for dinner?" She teased.

"Maybe," he kissed her cheek, "that and Jean also misses you coming by."

"Alright… provided we don't get called in on a Sunday, I'll drop by in the afternoon to make the call… you'll be there, right?"

"For as long as you want me to be, sweetheart."

"Good," she smiled and leaned in to press her lips softly against his. "Good."

Alice's smile widened when he stared at her for a moment before a wide, boyish grin spread across his face, and she giggled as he pulled her in for another kiss - the shortbread tin lifted from her hands to be placed on the coffee table as he kissed her again.

It was getting late, and Matthew probably should leave, but Alice mused (as they traded more kisses) that he wasn't leaving any time soon.

-----

"How have you been since our last meeting?" Dr. Graves asked him, and Matthew couldn't stop the goofy grin spreading across his face at the memory of kissing Alice the night of her birthday.

"Matthew?"

"Sorry, Doc," he cleared his throat, but the psychologist waved him off.

"It's good to see you so happy. What happened?"

"I, uh, I told Alice about everything."

"That's good," Dr. Graves smiled. "And?"

"And what?"

"What's causing the grin?"

Trying to bite back another grin - and failing - Matthew ducked his head.

"Ah, well… Alice and I have a date… after sharing a few kisses."

The answering smile from his psychologist made it feel even better.

"Good, very good."

#alice harvey #matthew lawson #matthew x alice #tdbm fic #writing of dee #Anonymous

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