#he is going to have to unlearn those habits

[ssreeder]

happy april friend!! hope you're well. not gonna lie i live for the drama so this chapter was sooo great ah! as soon as general how showed up..... i knew shit was gonna go down. so good, man

'for the very first time in their life, she was afraid of him' holy MOLY my jaw was dropped for like 90% of that final interaction between sokka and katara. generally speaking, if one's reaction to being caught in a lie is to double down on their stance of not lying....not great. not a good look sokka. im glad katara got out of there to clear her head and go back to aang, but now i'm worried sokka's going to lose his mind and temper even more (is it possible?!?) once left and the realization of how he's treating everyone comes crashing down on him. because he doesn't want his sister or anyone to hate him or especially be scared of him. this one may hurt :(

and zuko being so certain that iroh wasn't real was so heartbreaking....i feel like being in and out of consciousness doesn't help wounds of the mental/emotional variety because memories are all weird so it's hard to make progress. hopefully katara works her healing magic so zuko can have actual conversations for a meaningful amount of time.

very excited for the next one obviously, but this was some good food!!!!! hope your upcoming week is swell. take care of yourself!!😠do a facemask or something. buy a tasty treat. you deserve it <3

General How: first decent military figure in LIAB.

*every time he shows up chaos ensues*

Sokka is such a mess right now its like pulling pet hair off a black shirt without a magic-fix-all lint roller. So he will probably do what he always does and blame himself and sink a little lower into his depression unfortunately. He did realize his mistake the moment the word left his lips but it was too late, the damage had been done.

Katara instigated the fight, but we are talking 14 & 16 year old trauma filled siblings who are used to bickering and probably didn’t expect it to escalade to this…. Sokka wasn’t going to budge the way he would normally when katara got upset and after she pushed a little too hard he snapped.

UGH Zuko haha…. Poor guy. Don’t worry Katara is going to do her best next chapter to help him & fingers crossed!

Thanks for the ask anon you’re amazing!

[dcxdpdabbles]

The Adoptive Son. Part 4

Dick struts into Crowne Co. main office like he owns the place. He has shaped his civilian persona to be a watered-down version of Brucie Wayne, so he winked at the receptionist and offered a kind smile to the employees wandering around.

The receptionist, a lovely man named Ace, waves him to the elevator without pause, pressing the button and allowing Dick to go to Crowne's office. Danny Crowne's main office was its own floor complete with five corner desks, a joint conference office, three stylish comfortable couches, and lots of open space filled with potted plants.

Only someone with the highest clearance levels was allowed in there. Dick had been made to wait in the lobby by Ace., The first few times, he came to visit Crowne. Thankfully, his presence is so commonplace now that he was allowed in without signing in.

The elevator's door close, blocking out all noise but the soft, classical music Crowne was rather fond up. His fake boyfriend seemed to swing from one music genre to the next with little sense. He could listen to an instrumental waltz, switch to punk rock, fall into the country, and finally go to pop within an hour. Dick can tell what kind of day Crowne is having based on the elevator music he has playing.

Since it's Mozart No. 13, Crowne is likely dealing with a stressful day. Likely trying to clean up a mistake made by an employee.

It was a good thing on the one hand- Crowne would be too overwhelmed to keep a proper eye on him. But it made Dick worry against his will. Crowne tended to work himself into a frenzy and often forgo his well-being if it were not for Tim or Dick telling him to rest.

You don't have time to worry about the trafficker. Dick tells himself as the elevator rises up to the top floor. You have a mission to complete.

He's carrying a take-out order to surprise Crowne with lunch. That's his cover store, at least; if things go according to the schedule they managed to hack into, his fake boyfriend will be called away for a meeting.

Dick will claim that it's fine. He will spend ten minutes reading a book he's left in Crowne's office and "fall asleep".

During that time, Bruce will hake into the cameras in Crowne's office and play a loop of him napping on a couch. In reality, Dick will be going through the office to find any kind of evidence. It's been almost five months since he took on this assignment, and he barely has anything to show. Bruce was becoming impatient.

Thankfully, little Damian kept most of Bruce's attention. The little eight-year-old had been the surprise the three main Justice Leaguers had found at Nanda Parbat. All those years of Dick complaining about Talia al Ghul being evil were true.

She had done something terrible to Bruce without his consent, and Damian al Ghul had been the result.

Then, Talia planned to raise her son as the next heir for her father's league until Bruce convinced her that Damian deserved better. Now Damian was at the manor, slowly unlearning all the terrible habits installed into him from birth.

He had attempted to fight Jason for his second son position, but Bruce had put a stop to it by claiming Jason was a new recruit, and that must have meant something to Damian because the kid backed off.

Now, Damian stuck to Jason's side like a small shadow, watching and learning everything he could. He seemed to adore Jason and looked up to him like the other boy was his idol.

Jason was over the moon about having a baby brother, deciding he wanted to teach Damian proper English- the young child had been learning but struggled a bit- and read him a bedtime story every night.

Dick wished he could claim the same regarding his younger brothers. But sadly, he and Jason did not have the best relationship due to Dick's horrible temper. This, in turn, made little Damian weary of him, keeping a safe distance whenever Dick came over to report on his undercover mission.

The door to the elevator opens, and Dick comes face to face with Crowne, rapidly typing away on his computer with a mantic glint in his eyes. He's got all three desks covered in piles of paperwork and four chalk boars with various colored writing.

Oof, it's worst than he thought.

This looks like it was a level 10 mess. In the five months that he has dated Crowne he's only seen a 10 twice.

Dick clears his throat hoping to break Crowne from his trance. It doesn't work, not that he's surprised. Carefully placing the take-out bags on one of the couches, he struts over and gentle taps one hunched over shoulder.

Crowne eyes swing to him, his entire expression brightens when he realizes who it is. "Hello Darling. I'm sorry I didn't hear you come in"

Dick's heart flutters at the word of endearment. He takes control of the reaction by channeling it into making his eyes soft as he leans down for a kiss. Crowne meets half way, melting against Dick like he's not used to being desired.

It's so adorable that Dick allows the kiss to linger longer than normal. He pulls back, smirking at the red cheeks and a slightly dazed expression on Crowne's face. He never gets tired of putting that particular look on Crowne.

"It's alright, I can see you're busy. My fault for dropping in unannounced, but I was in the neighborhood, and we could have lunch together." Dick tilts his head "If you have time to spare".

Crowne looks very remorseful. "I'm so sorry, darling. I have a meeting about the new cellphone models, and I just found out the model is having issues. The batteries are blowing up while the camera feature is either freezing the whole processor or just breaking down the command. I don't have much time today for lunch"

Dick knows it's part of the plan, but he can't help but be sad they can't spend too much time together. It's done wonders for his undercover job as Crowne nervously plays with a pen, apologizing again for his workload.

He shrugs, offering to wait for Crowne with the prepared excuse. The other man brightens, promising to finish as soon as he can. Dick walks over to grab his book as Crowne returns his attention to his screen, typing even faster.

He's never seen anyone that could type as fast as Crowne, not even Bruce or Babs. The fact Crowne created his working computer from the processor to the modified keyboard meant very little.

Crowne typed on any computer as if he had lessons from birth and not learning alongside the rest of the world when computers started getting more popular. Dick still knows many people who prefer paper and pens to have to press keys.

"You won't be alone for too long," Crowne calls, eyes never leaving his screen as his fingers fly over the slightly curved keyboard "Tim will be here in half a hour. You two can spend time together"

Dick forced a smile "Sounds great"

Just great. Drake's arrival would limit his snooping time. Recently he's noticed the younger boy always seemed to insert himself between Dick and Crowne. Alfred had laughed when he reported this slight mishap claiming that he would get the same complaints from Bruce a few years ago.

Back when Dick would try to scare away Catwoman or Talia.

Dick knows that different. He is trying to stop a legit trafficking ring and doesn't want to have some adult time with Crowne. Bruce should have not been looking for a stepmother for him, especially with those women.

Not when Clark Kent was literally right there. He'll convince the old man of this someday.

"Tim looks up to you. He makes inquiries about you often." Crowne continues. His more formal speech means he is slightly nervous. Dick's lip twitches into a smile as his face turns red; simultaneously, his posture straightens. Another give. "I was wondering if you would like to do an event with him."

"A event?"

Crowne pauses, then in a forced calm voice, he says, "I have a side project that involves some of Gotham's youth. The kind of youth often overlooked."

The warm feeling crumbles in Dick's chest. Quickly he double-taps his recording bracelet. This is it. The first real sign of Crowne's side business. He has finally been let in on it.

Dick is going to be sick.

"I wouldn't mind. This project..what is it?" Dick asks carefully, standing up and sauntering to Crowne. He swings his hips a little too much, but it is just what the other man likes as his eyes finally leave the screen and lock on his strut.

He leans on over the desk, smirking as Crowne fumbles in front of him. He's adorable-

No. He's easy to trick.

He sells kids. Dick needs to remember that. His treacherous heart still speeds up.

Crowne stares at him with a slack jaw, and it strokes Dick's ego fiercely. He waits a few minutes, but when all his fake boyfriend does is gawk, he leans closer. "Darling? The project?"

"Oh! Oh yes, of course," Crowne jerks in place, quickly pulling open a drawer. He presses a button inside the drawer- Dick makes a note to check that later- and a side compartment opens. He pulls out a small black notebook with a green ghost flying around a white D on the front of it.

Dick recognizes the symbol. It's the same one that a few street kids passed to Jason a few weeks ago. Jason had gone in as Robin- the more beloved Robin. Dick hates to admit it, but his brother has a better connection with the people of this city.

The street kids said that if you showed this symbol at secret meetings, then you would get supplies and support at said meetings. The thing was, most of the younger kids did not come back from the meetings.

They weren't taken by force, but after a third or fourth visit, they agreed to go with the men and women passing out the resources. Batman had yet to pin these meetings down since they were using vans and popping up randomly throughout the city. They would tear down and be on the road long before the morning light graced the sky.

Crowne flips through the book landing on a page and pushing it to Dick. "I am opening a gym for youth. I was thinking of advertising it as gymnastics and aquatic sports. I know you've dabbled in them before and was wondering if you would teach a beginners class?"

Dick reads over the page. It's like a mind map of a gym, with ideas and more accurate details circled and connected in a giant web. None of it seems sinister.

None of it seems well organized either, but it's wild and brilliant just like Crowne. Why did this man waste so much talent on crime? Why couldn't he be the perfect partner he was pretending to be?

"Where did you get this notebook?" He hears himself say, eyes tracing the beginner's trapeze and beginners Aerial silks with question marks hungrily. He's never thought about teaching his skill, but being surrounded by eager children looking up at him to learn of his family's legacy...... makes him yearn.

When his fantasy turns to the horde of children calling him dad and then running around Crowne calling the other man father, that desire is pushed to the furthest part of his mind.

He won't give in to them. Maybe he would one day find someone to settle down with. One day the Flying Graysons will grace the skies again. But they will never carry the Crowne name.

"A kid sold it to me," Crowne says with a confused tilt of his head. "I was walking through the street vendors festival, and he had a blanket covered in different notebook designs. He didn't pay for a table, and he was a bit away from the entrance, but he was doing his best. I bought eight of them. You should have seen the way his eyes lit up."

Dang it. Not a confession. Not even anything he could use to tie Crowne to the symbol.

The other man raises a brow "Why do you ask?"

Dick smiles with enough heat he practically undresses. Crowne predictably goes beat red at the sight. "I like the design. Wanted one for myself."

"I...I have the young man's contact information. If you desire it, I could purchase some for you?" Crowne melts, pulling on his collar.

Alright. Maybe the kid will be willing to talk. "That would be lovely. You know what else would be lovely?"

He rounds the desk, his lips pulling into a slutty smile. Placing his hands on each arm rest he leans forward, trapping the other man in his office chair. Crowne swallows. "What?"

"You, me, and a hotel room all to ourselves." Dick's voice turns dark with sinful promise. Crowne lips tremble, but he nods.

"I....I've never been with anyone before" the other man confesses and Dick feels a wicked amout of want. He wants to be the person to show him. To teach him. To make his first time so special and wonderful and-

The elevator doors dig open. Drake hopped in, using clutches, and shouted proudly, "I broke my leg!"

Crowne pushes Dick away, rushing to the boy. "Ancients! What in the world happened!?"

"I got mugged on my way to the library!" The boy says it's the greatest thing to ever happen to him.

"That's not a good thing, Tim!"

"It's okay! Robin and Sparrow saved me! It was so cool!" Drake swoons. "I don't know why they were out so early, but they swooped in and got the man who broke my leg before he could get away. Robin even swung me to the hospital! Sparrow didn't say much besides tsking, but he was cool too!

Dick squishes the small amounts of regret for being Interrupted. He glances at the other two before quickly shoving the black book into his pocket. This may give him more answers. They need to see if they can spot that symbol anywhere in the city.

Damian still needs to be discovered in the media. Bruce had decided to keep him hidden in the manor to build a better introduction. Which means they have the perfect candidate to try to get a in at the meetings.

He must close this case before his rapidly developing feelings get in the way.

Drake spots him over Crowne's shoulders. The excitement on his face dies, as he glares at him. Dick hides a wince. Looks like today will be another, "Stay away from my big brother" day from Drake.

"Thank goodness the vigilantes were near you." Crowne gushes, brushing the hair out of Drake's face. He places a kiss on the bruised forehead.

Drake's voice turns hard. " Yeah...almost like they were following me."

Crude. He'll have to warn Jason and Damian to not follow him for a while. Again, he curses that Drake is far too smart for his own good.

[leclercsbunny]

maybe if you loved me ♡ c. sainz

part one ♡ masterlist

f1chai amid the silly season, carlos sainz and long time girlfriend y/n y/l/n have confirmed their break up in separate instagram posts claiming the split to be amicable and a mutual decision. although the reason for their breakup was never mentioned, it was alleged that the couple had issues involving a nameless third party in two separate ocassions.

more than the heavy weight of your luggage, there was an unsettling feeling of dread and restlessness slowly easing it's way into your chest. shoulders sagging, you passed the bag to the driver; mentally preparing yourself to face him. you felt shaky, emotional and the makings of a headache were making itself known— perhaps due to dehydration or the sweltering heat in mallorca that you've usually loved.

not in this very day though. today, it stung your skin. made your eyes squint, increasingly sensitive, what with the waterworks you've unleashed the night prior.

"uh.. i'm leaving." your voice was timid, while carlos shifted on his feet, stiff as a board. a day old stubble and his underbags were prominent. you both looked worse for wear, yet you couldn't find within yourself some comfort with that.

"i'm sorry, y/n..." he repeated the same phrase, as if a mantra now; but you refused to acknowledge his apologies, as you did the night before. if he was truly sorry, he wouldn't have wronged you. not once, not even twice. "i'm really sorry. i love you, i promise you that. i really do—"

"please carlos... i'm done. we're done. no amount of apologies could ever make up for what you did." you wipe your tears with trembling hands. you'd wanted to scream at his lying and cheating face, ask him why you weren't enough; why was he insisting that he loves you when he clearly, can't hold onto it?

you spent half a decade with this man. you love him beyond reason, without a doubt. and it was against every single will in your body, but your heart was aching for him.

yet you... had to leave some respect for yourself. you were going to walk out of his life with your dignity intact.

it was not easy to strip away every reminder of carlos in your life— you grew together, experienced and enjoyed the different things life had to offer.

there were certain quirks you learnt from him.

things you'd borrow off of eachother which had slowly transformed to this surprisingly tasteful blend of your styles.

it was not easy to unlearn those habits, and contain the urge to wear something of his favorite.

but it was more than difficult to face the one and only person in both of your lives that mattered the most.

the last thing you'd expected when you'd opened the door was reyes, clutching onto a tearful matteo. without thinking, you've opened your arms to the boy and he'd jumped into your arms unbashedly, whining out a wet cry.

you'd pursed your lips, looking towards the elder woman who's motherly gaze made your resolve weaken. you could also faintly see the tears in her eyes, and you could only muster a small smile.

you assumed his father had explained why you weren't around any longer; it had been six weeks since you've broken things off with carlos.

you rubbed matteo's back in hopes of comforting the boy, he'd been evidently upset, "he keeps saying he misses you." reyes explains softly.

your eyes closed briefly, attempting to stop the tears, "i missed you too, sweet boy." you whisper words of comfort to him, trying to ease his crying. his sobs eventually calmed down, but his hold on you never faltered.

"will you still be my mama?" came the weak and small voice. it made your chest tighten, and you tamper down a sob.

"only if you want me to be, matteo." you whisper back, pressing a kiss on his temple.

f1chai carlos sainz launches his new relationship with a steamy liplocking in public with mystery woman

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Omg hey I woul like to request something ! Ken x Reader (male, if possible) where the reader teaches Ken about the real world and they're also very in love. Thank you very much !

When Ken returned to the Real World again, he had a vision similar to Barbie's--realizing his owner was nearby.

Instead of a child....it's you, an adult who (like Gloria) inadvertently projected your own insecurities onto him while looking at an unboxed Beach Ken doll in your attic.

When you were younger, you really wanted to play with it unlike other boys who had action figures and nerf guns...but you were sorta shamed into keeping it boxed, as your parents said it would be more "valuable" one day.

Similarly..Ken had been stuck in a box all his life, trapped in the role of Barbie's accessory until recently.

So there's an instant connection when you two meet.

To make a long story short, you're like "ohhh hey I guess I kinda fucked up your mental stability, bro...you wanna come over and we can talk about it, man-to-man?"

He was very eager to go with you and learn more about your world beyond all the patriarchy and toxic masculinity.

You tell him about using your "male privilege" for good, and one defining example was when a random woman taps him on the shoulder, looking terrified and almost in tears.

"H-Hi, um..this is gonna sound really awkward but can you two pretend to be my friends for a second? This guy has been following me-"

"Of course." You reassure her, before looking to the confused Ken and telling him to go along with it.

The creepy guy comes along and backs off when he sees you two standing there protecting this lady, and once he's gone, she thanks you with hugs before leaving.

"I think I did a good job." Ken turns to you for validation, eyes shimmering. "Was that good, [y/n]? I mean playing pretend is all I've ever done so-"

"Yep. You did great." You chuckle, patting his shoulder. "I'm glad she thought you were a safe person to approach."

He nods and is giddy the whole way back home, especially when you get into your car and show him the different mechanisms, with him clinging to every detail.

These life lessons you're teaching him, however, made him think back to the "Kendom"...and he admits to trying to reinvent patriarchy there and feels ashamed of how he treated the Barbies.

He didn't think he'd open up this quickly to you, considering he never had any "manly" talks with other Kens (besides beach-offs).

But besides you being his owner, there's something about you that just made him feel...secure enough to do so. Like he could tell you anything.

You listen and reassure him that acknowledging his mistakes was a great first step to unlearning those toxic mindsets.

With all of that finally hashed out, you decide to show him the simple pleasures of the real world. Like cooking, watching TV, playing video games, etc.

Just mundane things you regularly do, with Ken picking up on some of your habits/routines as well as having some independence of his own.

You two grow closer as a result over the next few weeks, and you began falling for him and his humor and his charming smiles-

Yeah, you're 100% smitten for this doll who crossed worlds to meet you.

But you're not sure if he felt (or even could feel) the same way, since he was made to love Barbie and was...clearly still getting over his "breakup" with her. So you left it be.

That changes when you show him some emotional movie where the lead male characters showed vulnerability (ie Good Will Hunting or Brokeback Mountain) and he unconsciously holds your hand as he stares at the screen, tears staining his cheeks.

While the credits roll, your heart melts as he looks at you with those pretty blue eyes, his watery smile persistent.

"Th-Thanks for showing me this, [y/n].."

"Of course, Ken. Now you know that us guys don't always have to pretend to be tough. We're allowed to have feelings." You rub your thumb across his knuckles, a sweet gesture which makes him blush.

On the subject of feelings, he realizes that the ones he has for you are...leaning more into romance than "bromance" (yeah you taught him that term and it's part of his vocabulary now).

He becomes uncharacteristically quiet when you ask him what's on his mind, before he leans in to kiss you on the cheek. Purely on impulse.

You're both flustered at what happened, yet he panics internally when you don't say anything, trying to get up to leave so you didn't see him cry over the stupid decision he made-

"Ken, it's okay." You take his hands, convincing him to sit back down. "I had no idea you swung that way, but I'm...actually glad."

"Glad? Y-You're not...mad or anything?" He sniffles.

"Of course not. I....was planning to come out of the closet sooner or later. I just didn't know when or how to bring it up, but....I guess I don't have to worry about that anymore, thank god."

"So...does this makes us boyfriend and g....boyfriend?"

"If you want it to be, sure. I wouldn't mind a handsome doll being the love of my life." You wink.

Ken mirrors your smile, relieved to know you reciprocated his feelings.

Then he gets stumped on something and his eyebrows furrow.

"Wait...what closet were you talking about?"

Oh boy.

You just chuckle and give him a kiss on the lips.

Falling in love with a Ken doll from Barbieland certainly wasn't on your bucket list....

But you're perfectly content with that.

[aayakashii]

32 🔪 and 25🔪 for Jiro? I can't really see him calling someone pet names but I can see him mistaking obsessive feelings for scholar curiosity and maybe borderline stalking.

25🔪 “I know everything about you.”

32 🔪 “I’ve always been watching you, beloved”

Warning: yandere behavior, nsfw, masturbation

Jiro could see you with his eyes closed. Much like when you ask someone to picture an apple, in order to diagnose their level of aphantasia, if anyone asked him to close his eyes and picture anything to a level of near-perfection, he would picture you.

He knew every single detail of you. He kept notes on it, in fact. Notebooks upon notebooks of information about you. A stack of paper way thicker than your official patient file, because he included information that definitely did not need to be used when going through an anamnesis.

Sure, he duly noted the usual data. He knew about your health history, your family’s health history, your past medical records, your personal information and every symptom you may have ever had during his care. But hey, that’s to be expected - he was making daily check-ups on you after all.

However, he also knew which drinks you’d buy on a daily basis, your favorite little snacks and how often you’d bite your nails.

He knew how much caffeine you ingested everyday, the way you sighed loudly when you were tired and how you flipped your hair when you were annoyed.

He knew you hummed when you showered, he knew you mumbled when you slept and he knew the placement of every little mole and scar on your body.

Jiro knew everything about you. And a forgotten, mostly silent part of himself felt a bubbling pride over being the only one who could claim that.

He didn’t know who he was before his coma. He lost most memories and unlearned how to feel. Others would call him a mere husk of a human being, something incomplete, and Yuri seemed to find this greatly insulting; Jiro, however, would only blink. He didn’t know what it was to be or not to be human. What made anyone more human than the others, after all? Philosophy became much more of a hassle to understand after he woke up after all those months being half-dead.

But he knew that, amidst the muddled haze of emotions and thoughts, he had one purpose in that new life of his, besides being a doctor’s assistant - and that was to watch you. Something deep in his gut pushed him towards you.

His eyes would follow you everywhere and his feet would take him to your room. He rummaged through your things, analyzed your habits, and read your notes and diaries. He knew he should feel shame over invading your privacy, but there was none (or so he murmured to himself as he rubbed his own face, wiping off a smirk from his lips).

Jiro read all about your fear of mutating into something unknown and that, actually, he could understand. He wouldn’t be able to observe you if you became an anomaly, after all. He needed to find a way to keep you as you are.

He would also go through that one hidden basket, filled with your dirty clothes. He’d always grab one of your shorts and smell it like an addict and something inside him would stir. It was very interesting, he thought, how a rush of blood could feel so pleasant. His hurried hands would push his pants down until his cock was freed, and he would smell you again, wrapping his hand around his length, throwing his head back until breathy moans slipped from his lips. It was good, it felt so good to thrust against his own hand as he suffocated himself with the scent of you. It felt so good, so so good to drench your floorboards with his cum, to mark his presence in your room with stains you’d never see. It felt so good to know you’d sleep with him, in a way.

Gasping for breath, he would watch through the window as you walked in the distance, tired and crestfallen, towards your dorm.

It was always the same thing, everyday. Everyday at 5PM, he’d put everything back in place and slip away, unnoticed, with more of you in his mind - more to write down on his notes.

And the next day, it would be the same thing, all over again. And the next, and the next, and the next.

Yuri and him needed to work harder, he mused. He needed to keep up with his routine.

He has been and would always be watching you, after all, in spite of death.

Full masterlist

[glacierclear]

Having some mad fuckboy!Leon thoughts rn

After he's unlearned all the stuff he taught himself and is basically done with the whole fuckboy thing oh man he would be SO soft. Holding your hand? Check. Cuddling at his dorm? Check. Being more gentle and loving during sex? Also check.

Also, stealing his hoodies. He'd melt for sure

oh, for sure. healed fuckboy!leon would be a SIGHT TO BEHOLD.

he wouldn't be perfect...

progress isn't linear. he'd stumble a lot. make a lot of mistakes and backward steps. you would need to be patient. you would need to be careful. especially in the early stages. because damn, he's trying. he's trying so hard. and you need to acknowledge the effort, even if it's hard to see, because any praise towards this will mean so much to him.

it'd come out especially on his bad days. he's more impatient. short-tempered. lashes out over seemingly mundane things. you'll need to be firm but not demeaning. catch his tells, his habits, and figure out the real reason he's behaving the way he is.

you'll need to slowly teach him the true depth of his words. that they hurt you just as much as they hurt him. he's unfamiliar with the idea of accountability, so you need to teach him about consequences. let him know you're upset and angry at him. but just because you're upset doesn't mean he's irredeemable. he'll assume any pushback is you ending things permanently. he needs the space to fuck up and forgive himself.

and damn it all, he's the jealous type. possessive. protective as all hell. it's toxic, and you need to teach him boundaries. it'll be tough. he worked so fucking hard to get you, doesn't he deserve to have you the way he needs? but no. you need freedom. he'll learn eventually, but be prepared to send a lot of "im safe and i miss u" texts to him when you're out with friends.

speaking of toxic. the toxic masculinity will be hell to unpack. sometimes it's nice! he insists on you being passenger princess. he insists on picking up the bill (well, once you're actually dating). he doesn't mind taking care of spiders (and fine, just because you asked nicely, he won't kill them). but...the bads get real bad.

displaying any kind of vulnerable emotion is like pulling teeth. when he's nervous, scared, anxious...he'll take it out on others. or himself. early progress will be made when he's blackout drunk and spilling everything to you. he reveals the deepest, most fragile parts of himself on these nights. it's like he's an entirely different person. and the next morning he'll do his best to sweep it all under the rug, but you have to fight for it. accept him and love him despite how "totally fucking lame" he acted (his words, not yours).

that being said. the good parts? oh yeah. Boyfriend Material 100%.

he'd do anything for you. anything. don't even say shit as a joke because he'll do it. at a certain point he doesn't even care if his friends think he's being stupid. you're his whole world. he'd wear stupid t-shirts for you. go to that concert you're dying to see even if he thinks the music sucks. he'll bash his head into a wall and learn to bake french pastries if it'll get you to smile. through hell and high water, he'll follow.

and yeah, he weans himself off social media. stops posting thirst trap photos and cuts ties with his sneaky links. but the lack of external validation is felt, and it kind of falls on you to fill the void. clingy won't even begin to describe what he is. he'll resort to begging. he will. late to work in the morning? that's not his problem. you're staying in that damn bed and you are cuddling him. you think him wearing tank tops in the middle of December is just a dumb mistake, but you catch on quick when he starts to shiver and needs to huddle you for warmth. "you want me to die of hypothermia? c'mon, babe. get closer." and yeah. those ice cold hands are going straight on your stomach. have fun.

part of the excitement will come from truly learning who he is as a person. most of his herculean facade is a persona. he doesn't actually like beer. he likes dry whiskey and refined clear liquors. he doesn't actually enjoy parties. the crowds make him nauseous, and he can always blame it on the alcohol. he's not actually all that into sports. you figure out he has a well-loved public library card and he knows the mystery section like the back of his hand. he's vibrant. shockingly intelligent. gets that light in his eyes when you nudge him about his interests. it'll be hard to get him to admit it, but his favorite part of the week is huddling on the couch watching nature documentaries with you.

and it's a two-way street. he remembers everything about you. early on in your relationship you casually assume he'll never keep track of the important dates. that's the stereotype, right? you couldn't be more wrong. birthdays. anniversaries. doctor's appointments. your fucking dog's yearly vaccine. he won't necessarily go all-out, not until you're more of a long-term thing, but what he does is meaningful. sincere. you won't get $500 of flowers and chocolate for valentine's day, but he'll abduct you from work, drive you out far, far into the countryside. lay out a patchwork blanket and stare at the night sky. he brought your favorite brand of pita chips and sneakily worms a gift box in your hand. it's that stupid $15 thing that's been sitting in your online shopping cart for weeks that you could never justify buying. and yeah, he'd appreciate a blowjob under the stars, but seeing you happy is enough.

and you could never begin to imagine how loving and passionate he can get during sex. it's totally different than his usual flavor. casual hook-ups and one-night stands are merely a fraction of his power. he tends to avoid intimate gestures on those nights. no eye-contact. hardly any kissing. he likes it rough and he likes it fast. but with you? he takes his time. commits your body to muscle memory. his gaze is intense, and he watches every reaction, trying to map out your flesh like a cartographer. he'll happily make out with you for upwards of a couple hours before you even begin the real foreplay. and you always cum first. always.

oh, but if you're not a fan of PDA...he might be a problem. he's proud of you. you're the hottest thing on two legs as far as he's concerned. he'll have no issue grabbing your ass, wrapping a hand around your waist, kissing along your neck, whispering the most obscene things in your ear. it's not even to make a point. there's no rhyme or reason. he just wants to. and you're right there. and what right does the world have to tell him to stop? does it make people uncomfortable? who cares. he'll lay off if it really bugs you that much...but if he catches anyone staring at you too long he'll ramp it up. it's almost aggressive. you turn to scold him, noticing how his eyes aren't even on you. he's staring at someone else. someone who's looking at what's his.

he's a yes man, too. if you need restraint and careful guidance in your life...he's not the one. he'll support any weird, out of the blue hobby you want to pursue. if you even joke about quitting your job he'll egg you on. "i'll drive right up there and tell your boss i'll fuck his wife!" and you have to talk him down. he'll punch the sun for you. he'll be behind every impulsive purchase. every 4am trip to walmart. every instinct to feed your id. any "little treat" you want to have he'll get it. because you deserve the best. if you ever want to have a stable bank account you need the be the voice of reason. because it's not gonna be him.

yeah. he'll have a lot of problems. don't worry about that. but, at least with fuckboy!leon, you'll almost never have any doubts that he loves you. once you manage to pin his heart on his sleeve, it's there for life and it'll always be yours.

[frvnkcastles]

May I have something where it dort of explores past sh? Where the reader is cutting mango or avocado I the palm of her hand and cuts through the shin into her hand and she just stands there for ages just staring as she's bleeding weighing up how much she can get away with on accident without frank bringing in Matt the Human Lie Detector, and she goes in for a second swipe when frank comes back from the shower and she tries playing it off like she just cut her hand and hea right up in there wanting to help but he notices the partal deeper in the top end so its been done over again? Right over the crease over her palm fluff and comfort please?

THE WAY I HELD YOUR HAND ➵ F. CASTLE

Summary: You give in to the urges and Frank helps you with the aftermath.

Warnings: SELF-HARM, hurt/comfort, feminine nicknames, language

Word count: 1.2k

Author’s note: This is a heavy one, so read with caution (or skip entirely if you feel like it might be too much!) I’m sending you so much love anon, I know from experience what a struggle it can be to stay sober but I believe in you! Stay strong, you deserve to heal <3

With Frank’s support, you had managed to abstain from harming yourself for a while now. He gave all the credit to you — he was just along for the ride, and you were the one who did all the work. Nevertheless, he had been a massive comfort, always distracting you when you felt the urge and encouraging you to try again if you fell back into the cycle. You wanted to get rid of the habit of hurting yourself, anyway, but he gave you extra motivation to do it, as you really wanted to prove to him that you could do it and make him proud in the process. Of course, he was proud of you no matter what, but whatever it took to give you the boost you needed, he was okay with.

So, with him constantly by your side, you started to unlearn the knee-jerk reaction of hurting yourself and grow out of it. It had been a long while since you had succumbed to the compulsion, and you didn’t think you would lose yourself to it anytime soon.

That was why you were surprised yourself with how quickly you changed your mind. It had been a long, tiring day and maybe that explained your struggle to slice through the mango you had grabbed in the need of a snack — either way, the knife slipped and in the blink of an eye, you had cut your palm open. Blood began seeping out and you froze on the spot, unable to move or react in any way.

You stood there, staring at the wound that painted your skin redder by the second. You dropped the mango on the kitchen counter and swallowed hard, your thoughts laser-focused on what had been an accident but suddenly felt so fateful. Instead of trying to stifle the bleeding, your first instinct was to watch it dribble down your wrist and wonder how long you could drag this out. You were thrown right back into that old state of mind where you let the pain linger, where it felt like you were punishing yourself, and deservedly so.

You knew Frank would worry. And you also knew that he wouldn’t buy any flimsy stories about it being an accident — which it was, at first, but before you fully even processed what you were doing, you were swiping the knife across your skin once more. All those old feelings came rushing back, causing you to lose track of your surroundings. You couldn’t focus on anything else except the mixture of relief and regret pounding at your head and heart, and you let the moment go on for longer than you should have.

”Sweetheart, what happened?” Frank’s worried voice broke through your trance, his large hand coming to cradle yours with his eyes wide and alert. You hadn’t noticed him getting out of the shower, and immediately, you felt embarrassed about being caught, but you couldn’t get a single word out. ”Darlin’, you’re bleedin’. Shit”, he went on, his usually calm voice trembling with panic. You didn’t blame him, there was a lot of blood dripping onto the counters, after all.

”It—it was an accident”, you stammered out, shaking off your daze as you watched Frank grab the kitchen towel and wrap it around your hand to apply pressure and stop the bleeding.

”Gotta be more careful, sweetheart. This ain’t just a small cut”, he acknowledged with a heavy heart, his protectiveness kicking in as he kept squeezing the towel against your palm. The burning pain made you grimace, the gravity of the situation finally sinking in, and you felt horrible guilt blossom in your chest as you realized you had undone all your progress within moments.

You fell into silence, fearing how Frank would react if you admitted you had deliberately hurt yourself, but he figured it out even without your admission. He gently removed the towel after a couple of minutes of pressure, and above the bigger cut, he could see the second one you had made on impulse. He frowned, inspecting your hand before looking up at you, only to instantly pick up on your troubled expression.

”Baby, I don’t think this was an accident”, he probed gently, not wanting to make you any more uncomfortable than you already were, but he also couldn’t leave it unmentioned. His heart raced in his chest, concern for you coursing through his veins as he watched you look away from him. ”Hey, hey, hey. Talk to me, sweet girl, what’s goin’ on? You haven’t been’ doin’ this for a while now. Did somethin’ happen?” he went on, tilting his head to catch your stare but you were too ashamed to face him.

”It really was an accident at first. But then I… I just got reminded of what it was like and I couldn’t control the urge and—and I just…”, you rambled, not even entirely sure what had come over you, what would be good enough justification. A tear slipped from your eye and you sniffled, wishing you could undo what you had done, but at the same time feeling like you deserved further pain for your mistake.

Nodding in understanding, Frank reached with one hand to wipe your cheeks while supporting your palm in the other. ”Alright, sweetheart. I’m real sorry I wasn’t here to help you through it. But I’m here now and I’mma make sure we get this all cleaned up and we can keep talkin’ about it, yeah?” he promised, not a hint of judgment in his voice as he calmly reassured you.

”I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I did it. I was doing so well”, you spoke shakily, so upset that you would have to start all over again. But Frank didn’t see it that way.

”Oh, baby, you’re still doin’ well. It’s a setback, but it ain’t the end of everything you worked so hard for. Givin’ in once doesn’t mean you’re a lost cause. You can always stop again. You’re incredibly strong, hear me?” he insisted, having complete faith in you, and it soothed your thumping heart a little to hear it from him.

”I feel like I let you down”, you confessed quietly, finally looking him in the eye, and his heart ached at your words. He understood that he played a big part in your recovery, but he hadn’t realized just how much you valued his opinion and support.

”You could never. Never, got that? I’m always in awe of you, sweet darlin’, and nothin’ will ever change that. I can’t even imagine how tough it gotta be to fight the urge but you do it, anyway. That’s fuckin’ amazing”, Frank swore, meaning every word. He cupped your face with his free hand and leaned in to kiss your forehead, staying connected to you for a moment before pulling back and locking eyes with you.

”I love you, yeah? I know you can do this”, he added, and with a careful nod, you promised to at least try. He gave you the smallest of smiles, almost impossible to even notice, but you knew just how much care and affection it contained for you.

”Thanks, Frankie”, you returned the smile, warming his heart.

”There’s my girl”, he praised before turning back to your hand. ”Think we gotta pay a visit to the emergency room, sweetheart. Might need stitches”, he declared, and sighing, you supposed he was right.

But with him by your side, it would be okay, and you would bravely fight the urge next time it would dawn on you.

[vaultdwellerbarbie]

dating javi: headcanons

javi rivera (twisters)/reader

content warnings mentions of tornado, one reference to sex

sometimes i feel like it seems like i'm in love with anthony ramos. to set the record straight, this is because i am! but his birthday is 4 days before mind (different year) so i think i'm genetically predisposed to be.

PRIOR to losing his friends, javi was definitely a lot less mature and a lot lazier. that's not to say that he would have been a bad boyfriend at the time, but sometimes you're dragging him out of bed.

he was also a big snacker (he was still a snacker afterwards), those lime hot cheetos might taste good eating them but when you've just brushed your teeth and you go to kiss him and that's the first thing you taste it can be a bit jarring - he thinks it's funny when you make fun of him and tell him 'no more kissing' until he brushes his teeth.

he lets you style his hair for sure, since he has it longer he's definitely willing to let you brush it and style it for him.

he also strikes me as the kind of guy that might be a tiny tiny bit possessive, especially since he was in college at the time, so if he's not trying to leave a hickey he's giving you his clothing so you can wear it around.

he's also very sweet, though. he can be moody in the morning especially when he had been drinking the night before, but even then he tries his best to be nice to you. he for sure falls very hard, so he's going to treat you like you're the only person in the world that matters to him.

he's also going to go out of his way to treat you! i can see this being a few different things. on the spicier end, i definitely think he aims to please and he's not selfish whatsoever. but in general, he's going to buy you things and he's going to treat you to dinner and even if he's too lazy to make his own bed he'll make yours while you're in the shower so you don't have to do it.

you also need to clean his room together because he's too lazy to do that, but it's okay.

AFTER losing his friends, javi is a lot more mature and takes better care of himself but he's also fundamentally changed.

losing people like that makes him a lot more aware of your mortality and the fact that he could lose you in an instant - he's going to be a little clingier, but he's also going to be a lot more protective. if anything seems like it would put you in danger, he's going to be the first one to let you know and the first one to put a stop to it.

he's still possessive, but that paired with him being protective can mean that he's going to argue with someone who dares to look at you the wrong way until you tell him that he should probably stop.

he's neater, but that's something that he developed from being in the military. a lot of his bad habits were unlearned, so he's going to be a lot cleaner and more organized and he tends to wake up earlier in the morning.

even though his hair is shorter now, he seems like a guy who likes the feeling of his partner's fingers running through his hair.

he's still playful, even though he's been through a lot. he has a nice smile and he recognizes that you really like it when he smiles. he's still a total sweetheart to you even though he has his own little issues going on with storm par.

he does try to distance his personal life from his work, mainly because he's not always happy with his work because he's not making a difference like him and his friends had originally planned. he can sometimes get upset when thinking about work.

he also gets upset when thinking about the past, so on an anniversary of what happened, expect that you're going to be comforting him.

if you're ever going through a bad storm together, trust that he's incredibly, incredibly protective. even if you're not particularly scared, he's making sure that you're safe and holding you so you're not in any danger.

just general headcanons, he likes physical affection and he likes to touch you. sometimes it's kissing, sometimes it's holding hands. he does find it cute when you trace his freckles.

you're probably the only person he actually stands up for before leaving storm par if someone on his team says something rude to or about you - eventually, they recognize that you're off limits in terms of insults.

even though his life is pretty busy, i do feel like javi would want a family at some point.

he also does strike me as the kind of guy who pays for every date until you stop telling him to pay for every date because you should both be paying.

he also just likes learning about your interests and he never forgets them. if you tell him about something that just moderately interests you, that's something that he's going to remember and - if possible - it's going to come up as a gift in some way, shape, or form.

javi also seems like a hand kisser, like he's going to kiss your hand. but he's also going to kiss your cheek, and your forehead, and he also probably gets a little awkward when you kiss his cheek because you always always go for the cheek with the most freckles even though it's endearing to him.

[hotluncheddie]

t4t chubby autistic steddie GO

i have been thinking about this (nsfw from twitter!!) art lately so i am here with u <3

even tho i get nervous to write trans characters, idk why, i just don't wanna mess it up i think

but im doing my best!! bc autistic and gender exploration are very lovely wonderful cozy subjects so i'm gonna focus on that

this is such a string of ideas but - 4 u <3 :3c

Stevie leaves with Eddie and Robin, taking their trust fund and leaving their parents to it - too the rest of their lives - without her. Like the Harringtons always hoped, really.

Stevie doesn't need them, the money is useful but they offer nothing more to her.

She's able to buy an apartment. In Chicago. With her loves. They learn how to live. How to live together. How to be at peace.

There's big bright widows in the main space, with light and air and the sunset. The two bedrooms are cozy and warm and it's a place for them all to grow.

'There's chips here.' Eddie says. They have a matching day off and she's trying to practice what it is to do nothing, to truly rest. Eddie helps, by being there, keeping her still with his hands and his love.

But Stevie tenses up, she was snacking, has been snacking, trying to learn her hunger signals better - what they feel like to her. It was always a rule not to east in her room, not to eat between meals. But she was hungry, she had a snack.

'I'm not judging, I'm saying so we remember to take it out next time one of us goes to the kitchen.' Eddie says, coming back from changing the tape, kissing her. Kissing her and kissing her.

Stevie relaxes.

'You've gained a little weight.' Robin says, laying on Stevies thighs on the couch, crocheting while Stevie watches sports and rubs her knuckles agains her teeth, twirling a strand of Robins hair in her fingers.

She looks down at her best friend. Robin looks back at her.

Robin smiles.

'It's good. You look more like you than you ever have before.'

Stevie smiles back. Tries not to cry.

Stevie letting herself change, relax. Unlearn those eating habits that helped her feel in control. Instead allowing herself to enjoy, and eat the things she wants to, the things she likes.

Eats pasta every night for a month and doesn’t feel bad about it. Doesn’t force herself to eat kale because she hates it, spinach is good enough. She is good enough.

Eddie gets little chubbier, in this new life. After recovering from nearly dying. Explains to Stevie in his long lilting way that he likes it, feels more protected, like his skin isn’t so fragile now.

He’s never liked his body but now he truly knows how short life is, and, maybe he can learn to like this new one. In this new place, in the love that surrounds him.

Plus, the bats destroyed his chest. So without that in the way, no longer lurking and potentially ruining his day. He realises he can shed that background fixation he always seemed to have with thinness. The idea that it would make him look more masculine or more androgynous. Curves were for girls and Eddie was not. That.

But now, now, who fucking cares. He’s alive. He needs to eat.

Steve feels a finger trailing over her hip, dipping into the band of her underwear, skimming over her crack and the the ridges of stretch marks that lead up to her waist.

'So so pretty' Eddie whispers, and it's filled with so much awe, so much grace, so much reverence and love.

Stevie shivers, feeling endless and grounded and like her body is here and hers and everything she ever dreamed of because it exists now.

She puts her hand under her loose shirt, cupping her belly. Skin still sleep warm and the energy of her palm seems to cover her whole body in warmth, in light and softness. Tinging and bright. Still being traced lightly by the love of her life. But being loves by her own hands, now, too.

She exists. And finally, everything is beautiful.

[otomes-and-tears]

i am so glad there is another shiloh enjoyer and even more happier that you are an analyst of this silly little creature. do you believe shiloh has the capability of a redemption arc?

We're all Shiloh scholars! Majoring in Shilohnalysis and minoring in ophiology!

I like to believe that everyone is capable of growing, they just need to be willing to put in the effort to do it.

Habits are hard to break, and changing can be a terribly cruel thing for a normal person, and I'd likely be a million times harder for Shiloh. To be redeemed he'd need to confront not only the things he did, but the core of who he has been for literally this entire life.

During the prom date, Shiloh says that he doesn't know if a "real him" really exists. And I'm inclined to agree with him. Regardless of whether he feels any remorse or shame underneath his adorable soulless smile, manipulating and flattering is all that Shiloh knows. By the time we meet him in Our Life, he doesn't have his whole shtick polished and perfected, but that literal child is already at a point in his life where he thinks that being himself isn't worth it and that he's only ever worth anything as long as he's a sidekick, always ready to please the protagonist! It's fucked up!

He's literally seven at that point.

It's roughly the age when kids start really going to school and socialising in a space that isn't home, and this is what he resorts to do fit in. And it's not something he grows out of either!

He might be more manipulative and in more "control" when we see him in XOD. However, it's still the guy who would deliberately fall over and hurt himself if JB asked him to. Shiloh's relationships being replaceable, and him always being the one to end them doesn't erase all the humiliating things he willingly does to be able to have them in the first place. It doesn't change the fact that this all started when he was still early in his development and that all those absolutely crucial socialization milestones happened with this, with purely transactional relationships as a foundational block.

It would require so much work to unpack and unlearn all of it. And it would take being vulnerable and honest with himself, which Shiloh might not even be able to do easily. Mending his relationships will also be harder-- because for Shiloh, at the same time he likely did mislead and hurt a lot of people, for many others he just... Gave them exactly what they craved. A yes man, someone to shower them with praise and flattery. It's what he knows what to do. He just doesn't want to be lonely.

But then again, he's a difficult character to read and understand, and I think it's part of the reason why so many people hate him with a fiery passion, but I've always seen him as this deeply tragic figure-- which would likely make me a prime source of his manipulation, were he real.

[josephquinnswhore]

Watchful Eyes

Pairing: Joel Miller! Stalker boyfriend! x female reader

Summary: Joel hates when you go drinking.

Content Warning: shit writing, I’m drunk soooooo, stalker boyfriend Joel, reader is female and drinks alcohol, not seeing red flags.

Note: I’m drunk and this is trash.

Joel hated this—your one day of the two of you not working; and yet you’d insisted on seeing your friend, your best friend. You insisted. Pleaded, tried to make him see reason, that this was worth it, for you.. it was something that you’d hardly ever got to do. The stress of work and trying to keep a healthy relationship was diffficult, and Joel knew the struggle too.

He had to unlearn how to check your location, eyes lingering on the text chat where you’d messaged fifteen minutes ago stating you loved him. But did you really, if you’d not replied to his message. Could he really change his habits? Probably not.

12am rolls around and still no sign of you.

“Call me baby. Where are you?” You were drinking with your friend, of course a few others, all female, which he was thankful for. But that wasn’t enough to stop his mind from wondering. Maybe you’d explore something about yourself if only surrounded by women.

“Got some people coming over. Talk soon!” You texted back as normally as you could, thanks to auto correct.

He growls at the text, why in the world would you message him something so vague, who was coming over, when, were you going somewhere? When would you be home? Were there going to be men? He dreaded it, the anxiety and insecurity he faced as being with someone as beautiful as you.

“Fuckin Jesus Christ!” He cursed to himself, as his fists slammed onto the recliner he sat on. He trusted you, of course he did. You were a sweet woman, a loyal and wonderful women who had never given him a reason to ever doubt him. So why did he?

He didn’t trust a single soul to care for his girl. Especially while she was under the influence.. vulnerable.

As he started his car, he thought of every reason to excuse his irrational behaviour. He wanted to make sure you were safe, cared for, that no one were trying to grab onto you with their venomous hands. “Need to make sure you’re okay.” He murmured as his truck roared to life. Like all of his actions would be excused somehow if he said it aloud.

It’s almost humourous, how close you lived to your friend. Less than two minutes drive, a few streets away.. but he knew they would recognise his car, it was blantanly obvious, a white pickup with all of his construction gear on the back. So he turns the truck off and the lights, letting it roll down the hill until he can see you, standing on the balcony with a drink in your hand.

Only then does he pull the hand break as quietly as he can. He readjusts his blue cap so that he can tuck his stray curls under them, they’re unruly, and blocking whatever vision he has of you… finally.

You’re laughing. Of course you are, you’re a social creature when you drink, a few friends surround you as you make them all laugh. God he’s jealous—no, envious. Why couldn’t it be him? Hearing your sweet laugh and seeing those wonderful eyes staring into his own as he hears whatever you’ve said is so funny.

He texts you again, he can see your friends frown, and complain about how clingy he is, how you have no freedom where Joel is concerned. “Oh shut it you guys he loves me!” You excuse his behaviour and frown as you read the text.

“Oh.. Joel’s sick. I need to get him to the hospital. It could be his heart.” Your friends all give each other a look. You’re frantically packing your belongings before they could protest and Joel drives the short way home, getting into bed before you even start your car to drive home.

“Joel?” You call out wearily. He coughs and murmurs distantly.. “baby?”

Mad, you see him, your heart drops, his cheeks are stained with tears and his hand is clutching his chest. “Oh baby you look like you’re really struggling.” He can only nod at her shoulder as you come closer.

“It’s better now that you’re here. Thank you for coming. I really thought I was a goner..”

Fingers caress his outgrowing stubble.. “I’m here baby. Let’s get to bed.”

The alcohol still flowed through you—your veins, but you were holding him, and he’d never let you know that he smiled as you lie behind him, tucking him under the fleece blanket.

Joel was a bad man, and he loved it. For as long as you were his, he would do anything it took to keep you safe.

[two-sides-halved]

Continued | @erisdiamas

"Oh?? If it was that specific gem only, then why did your feelings for your own Jasper bleed into your opinion of my own? I mean, yes, she's dedicated, she was made to be, she's still kinda unlearning the homeworld propaganda that she's had ever since she popped out of her exit hole." He explained. "She still carries those feelings so failure from failing to protect her Diamond from being shattered, despite how it was faked... then despite how she fought during the war, fought on the side of Homeworld in Pink Diamond's name, despite being in Yellow Diamonds court now." Gem Steven replied. "She still carried those feelings of grief... she still does... so does Iris. Old habits die hard and all that..."

"I enjoy Jasper's company not, because she's dedicated to me, but because we share those feelings of failure to protect the people we swore to protect... I see myself in her... every flaw I have she also has... and I know you probably don't like hearing me compare myself to someone you deem a mutt, but that wouldn't be the first time I've compared myself to something akin to an attack dog."

He let out a low sigh. "I know that you don't need me... and I think that's why it hurts so much when you left the first time... because I know everyone's going to out grow me one way or another... hell Steven planned for his own cross country trip and all I could think of was... "of course he's leaving me... he doesn't need me any more no one does, I've become obsolete. I'm off color, overcooked, a mistake that no one wanted to deal with because everyone wanted Rose back and they got stuck with me." His tears started flowing over his cheeks, notably these tears didn't sparkly or fizzle away, but flowed down over his chubby cheek and onto the ground surprisingly no ill effects followed after.

"So when you came back I was so relieved to see you were ok, but then wracked with guilt that I didn't try harder to find you... that I when I was told she was going to be fine, I just believed you would instead of hunting you down like a bloodhound and making sure that you would never had to deal with any of this shit you had to deal with." He huffed a bit, as he pushed away the finished charcoal drawing, and wiped the dust on his pants before sniffling like a miserable kid huffing and puffing about a bad dream he had.

"By the time you left the second time I had figured... yea she can handle herself, she's proven to me she's been through hell and she can handle it, but I don't like it, I don't like leaving that up to chance... but I know the more I push you to stay home the more you're gonna feel like a fish inside a bird cage... longing for the open waters to explore the world, yet in an environment that's suffocating the longer that you're away from it." He huffed, and sniffled.

"I don't wanna make you feel like I'm suffocating you... I don't like feeling like I'm this massive problem that everyone has to deal... I don't like being constantly reminded of my past failures and mistakes...you're asking what I want... what I want is to forget about the past and have this fresh clean slate where I only remember being here on this Earth and not having to remember all the bad things that happened that caused me to be here in the first place." He shield himself. "I know everything that mom did albeit very fuzzy now, what she was thinking, why she thought it was the only way or a good idea... how she tried her damnedest to make things right... she never wanted to hurt anyone and she only ended up hurting everyone with her good intentions." He huffed as he made another few smores for the both of them passing her a few while eating one of them.

"I can't speak if your version of Rose was the same way, or even if Classic's version of Rose was that way, but I'd like to think that all these Roses are all cut from this same cloth of being underappreciated, rebelling against the idea that she's lesser than to everyone's failure to realize that she was unhappy, worked to make it so she could be happy, and only found happiness when she met someone like dad... who pushed back these feelings of superiority, who made her realize that what the diamonds did to her was wrong, but also that she was doing the same god damn thing and not realizing it until finally realizing that she was the problem and solving it by getting rid of herself..." He huffed, flopping down on the ground with his arms under his head looking up at the eerily green sky, with the shimmering starts peaking through, he was getting better but he wasn't quite there yet.

"To think all of this still stems from that movie is downright laughable if it weren't so emotionally draining." Gem Steven replied with a soft mumble due to his mouth being full.

[mychlapci]

Hmm, going old-school Megaratch reference.

Their bodies get jammed together due to a space bridge accident, which makes them one person and gives them a painful understanding of each other, their choices, and their shared doomed love of Optimus/Orion.

They separate and don't unlearn that and have habits from each other now and a deep sort of understanding that both of them, being very emotionally private people, don't have even with those closest to them.

When Optimus Prime goes missing/dies this time to save the whole species from an unrelated horror, Megatron pauses and Ratchet reflects and they both reach out to discuss terms. Both have an intimate understanding of each other and both sides and Megatron is struggling to wage war against people he felt love and protectiveness for through Ratchet while Ratchet has been dealing with understanding exactly why the Decepticons feel they can't back down.

Cue arranged marriage to settle the treaty between two sad old men who get soft together and find they have a lot more in common than they'd like. And that they help each other improve in ways they didn't expect.

OH i know that thing about Ratchet and Megatron being merged into one body. Was it actually a complete comic or just a proposition and a comic-cover? I have no idea, but I've heard about it. It would be very interesting, I always felt like Megatron and Ratchet have a lot in common just because they’re both just so devoted to their cause. It’s why Ratchet really hates Megatron. And I bet that while Megatron’s beef is mostly with Optimus, Ratchet really grinds his gears. But i think that if you put those two in the same body and they’ll quickly learn that they think alike. Both of their ideologies feel like they stem from moral outrage, perhaps even regarding the same subject matter.

poor Optimus, kicked out of the plot once again… c’est la vie. He’ll probably come back eventually, hopefully once the war is over.

I love to think about Ratchet and Megatron somehow making each other better. Ratchet learns to extend compassion towards the people he doesn’t understand, Megatron leans to extend compassion to people he once deemed immoral… it’s a big step towards ending the war. I think when Megatron approaches to autobots to start peace talks, he’s first gotta maneuver through the rest of the high command before he can discuss things with Ratchet. Turns out demanding an arranged marriage in return for peace was a good idea…

Optimus comes back from the dead and his ex and best friend are now married and the autobot-decepticon peace treaty is tighter than it could have ever been...

[thelovelylolly]

hi there :) i loved your latest Billy fic, it nearly brought tears to my eyes. could you please do a fluff alphabet with Billy ? Thank you 🤍 keep writing, you're so good at this !!!

Fluff Alphabet w/ Billy Hargrove

A/N: aw thank you so much love! i hope you enjoy <3 (also this isn't proofread bc im tired, what else is new lol)

A: Affection (how does he show affection/is he good at it)

He mainly shows it through physical touch or little acts of service. He's not very vocal about his love, he much rather show it. He loves to hold your hand or have an arm around you at all times.

B: Beauty (what does he think makes his s/o beautiful)

While physical looks are a huge part of his attraction towards you, he really loves your personality. He loves the little quirks about you, little things that only come out later on in your relationship. It's almost like he's the only person who knows about those things, and it makes him feel so special.

C: Comfort (how he comforts his s/o after a rough day)

He'd take you out for a drive. He'd let you pick the music to blast from the speakers in the car and let you roll the windows down. He loves to hear you scream the lyrics to your favorite songs and if he knows the song, he'd sing a long, too :)

D: Dreams (what does his dream future with his s/o look like)

He wants a home and kids, but he's terrified he'd become just like his father. He knows if he pursues the family life with you, you would never let him become like his dad, but it's still a fear he'll always have.

E: Equal (is he more dominant or soft in the relationship)

It's Billy, even ooc, he's the dominant one. He doesn't see himself as superior to you in anyway, he just knows what he wants and he's gonna get it, y'know? Your happy to let him take the wheel in the relationship, but you both know that you'd take it back if needed.

F: Fight (how would a typical fight go and how easily would he forgive his s/o)

At the beginning of your relationship, Billy would pick fights over stupid things. You fought back, putting him in his place of course, until the fighting became too much and you sat down with him to talk things out. After that, the fights nearly stop, only happening over serious things.

G: Gratitude (is he grateful for all his s/o does/has done for him)

He's so grateful for you. You helped him cope with the abuse he'd gone through, you were patient with him as he unlearned toxic habits he had because of his dad, you were an angel to him and he will always be grateful for you.

H: Honest (how honest is he to his s/o)

He's pretty honest with you. He only hid and lied about things to you at the start of your relationship, but once his walls come down, he doesn't have anything to hide. He mainly stopped hiding and lying to you because he never wanted to lose you over it.

I: Inspiration (did his s/o inspired him to become a better person)

Yes, 100%. Like before, you helped him cope with the abuse he had gone through. You helped him work on himself to become a better person, a person he would've never become without you.

J: Jealousy (does he get jealous)

Yes, yes, yes. Did I mention yes? He's so scared of losing you that if another guy tries to make a move on you, Billy is by your side in a second to scare the guy away. He knows you wouldn't leave him, but he can never too safe.

K: Kiss (where does he kiss his s/o, where does his s/o kiss him)

He loves to kiss you anywhere, but especially on your lips. While he's kiss other girls on the lips, you were different. Every time he kisses your lips, sparks fly like he's kissing you for the first time again and again. Your favorite place to kiss him is the top of his head. He loves wrapping his arms around you when your standing in front of him while he's sitting, so you would press soft kisses to the top of his head. Just gentle intimacy :)

L: Little ones (how is he with kids)

Not good AT ALL. Unless they're his, he does not like kids. He'd try to put up with other people's kids if your babysitting them or something, but he doesn't like taking care of kids that aren't his. If they are his, he's one of the best dad's out there.

M: Marriage (does he want to get married)

Yes, but I feel like he doesn't want a traditional wedding. If you want one, he'd be down, but I think he'd prefer a courthouse wedding with a small reception with your closest friends afterwords. He doesn't see the point of dropping thousands of dollars on one day, but like I said, if you want a traditional wedding day, he'd be happy with it.

N: Nicknames (what nicknames does he have for his s/o and vice versa)

His go-to pet names are 'babe', 'baby', and 'sweetheart'. He isn't good at making personal nicknames, so he just sticks with the simple pet names. You do the same, usually calling him 'babe' or 'handsome'.

O: On cloud nine (what's he like when he's in love)

When he's in truly and deeply in love, his playboy personality disappears. He's a gentleman and a sweetheart, making sure you know he loves you. At first, he doesn't say it a lot, but after a few months, he'll be saying "I love you" every chance he gets.

P: PDA (is he okay with pda)

He loves PDA. He loves having an arm around you or his fingers intertwined with yours. It's mainly because he wants to tell the world your his s/o and he wants to show you off.

Q: Quirk (a trait of his that makes him a great partner)

When he loves, he loves hard. He's kissing you, cuddling you, hugging you, doing things for you. You name it, he does it. He puts his whole heart into his relationship with you because he adores you and you treat him better than anyone else does.

R: Romance (how romantic is he)

He's romantic, but not in a cheesy way. He does the dinners and flowers, but not only on special days like Valentine's day. He also gets you little gifts no matter the occasion. You spotted something you wanted but didn't end up getting? It's on your bed a few days later with a sweet, short note from Billy.

S: Security (how protective is he)

Jealous AND protective. If he gets a bad vibe from someone, he's immediately finding a reason to get you out of the situation. He'd put himself between you and danger if it ever comes down to it. He puts you before him in a dangerous or uneasy situation.

T: Thrill (does he like new things in the relationship or does he like routine)

He loves adventure, so he likes to try new things. Mainly new date locations and activities to keep things fresh. I have a feeling he wouldn't like going back to the same place over and over again (unless it's your favorite restaurant or date location).

U: Ugly (what are some of his bad traits and does he know about them)

His temper. It's gotten better because you pointed it out to him, but it used to be so much worse. He used to have such a short temper that your arguments would be over stupid little things. It was because that was how he defended himself from his dad, so that's how he reacted whenever he felt threatened or criticize. Luckily, you helped him out and now he's much better.

V: Value (is his relationship his main priority)

YES!!! Billy is head over heels in love with you, of course you and your relationship is his priority! You're basically his entire world <3

W: Wild Card

He likes to be the little spoon when you two cuddle. With your arms around him, it's a reminder that you're there with him and you love him enough to cuddle with him. It's a comfort thing, and you don't mind it at all.

X: XOXO (how often does he kiss, hug, and cuddle with you)

Any chance he gets. He loves his arms around you and his lips on yours. If you need some distance, he'll respect that of course, but physical touch is definitely one of his love languages.

Y: Yuck (something he doesn't like)

Too much complaining. He understands complaining about your day or a person neither of you like, but he doesn't like it when you or anyone is constantly complaining like they're impossible to please.

Z: Zzz (how is he when he sleeps)

Since your relationship started and you two started to sleep in the same bed, he sleeps like a baby. He snores a little bit and tosses, too, but you two are always touching one way or another while you two sleep. After a while, Billy couldn't fall asleep without you with him.

[lovecatsys]

Some Random, unorganized, Academy X Headcanons

Because I've been thinking about them a lot lately, again.

More under the cut cuz this is really long, also cw for one headcanon that talks about self harm, grooming and sexual trauma (because. Kevin) it's the 7th dot.

Laurie should have a period of being besties with and being corrupted by Esme Cuckoo, this could take place either during or post Krakoa, or in an au where she doesn't die/m day doesn't happen, probably after the Garrison arc would have concluded.

Kevin has a slight southern accent, probably not super strong because he's from Atlanta, but enough to tell that he's not from the north. This goes in contrast with his style of course which makes it more interesting.

On naturally windy days, Sofia likes to train herself by going outside and immersing herself in the wind, and playing around with her powers, seeing how she can make her wind flow with, and against the natural wind. She likes to think of it as "flirting with mother nature." She even talks to "her" sometimes.

Brian playfully flirts with David when their squads still have a rivalry, long before David discovers his own bisexuality. He is completely clueless, has no idea that Brian is flirting with him. Sometimes this pisses Julian off, usually because HE'S supposed to be the one who has a rivalry with David, but when its a little more rude, they often play off of each other. This only adds to David's insecurity about himself, along with confusing him.

Nori has a lot of difficulty with relationships after she and David break up. She has an on again, off again thing with Julian that's really messy and toxic, mostly fueled by older teenage horniness and the close bond they develop post M day. She struggles with trusting that the people she gets close to aren't going to die or get terribly hurt, so she either pushes people away or clings to them really hard in an attempt to protect them. When Julian loses his hands, she's not only incredibly devastated but she begins to avoid him and push him away even more, which furthers his own complex about losing his hands, thinking that she's avoiding him because of his disability.

Nori also explores her sexuality as she gets older, becomes progressively more masculine, gets an even shorter haircut, probably an undercut, and has a lot of casual sex with a bunch of her female classmates, but never allows herself to get close to them or for it to mean anything other than meaningless sex to get by. While she tries to wear her sexuality with pride, she's still insecure about it, and thinks of her relationships with guys as more meaningful than those with girls, mostly because she's still scared of getting too close and losing them. She finds it easier with guys to pull off a complicated relationship like the one she has with Julian. She deeply longs to have a healthier relationship with a girl or a boy, like the one she had with David, but she's convinced herself that it's not safe because of the trauma she's endured.

I don't think Kevin should learn to control his powers, kind of in the same way I don't think Scott should ever lose his visor. But I think he would grow into learning how to live with them. I think he has a really complicated relationship with his own body, which was furthered by his sexual trauma from Selene. I think it also takes him a LONG time after he's resurrected to not think of Selene as like. the love of his life, because of the grooming and also because he craved the fact that she could touch him. I think Kevin also struggles with self harm, the fact that no one can touch him and he has to keep himself covered most of the time makes it really easy to get away with, and because of his complicated relationship with his body, he takes comfort in it. I think it would take a really long time and a lot of therapy for him to unlearn this habit like it would for him to learn that Selene had abused and traumatized him.

More on the first thing in the last note: I personally ship Kevin and Josh as endgame, and while I think their relationship would be unhealthy and weird for both of them at first, I think they could grow to be very healthy for each other. I imagine they would have a specialized house built with as few organic materials as possible, and if they had biological children somehow, their children would be immune to Kevin's powers. I think they would both work at some sort of mutant clinic, figuring out how to use their powers in tandem to cure cancer and other diseases, while Josh works there full time doing other things, Kevin would only do part time and spend his spare time making his industrial art. I think as he improves, his art would become a reflection of his pain. Frida Kahlo is probably his biggest inspiration, though she painted instead of sculpted.

Julian was able to bounce back from his bad post schism era with Emma's help at the start of Krakoa, I imagine she kind of fished him out of the gutter and helped him start his life anew, attempting to make up for the way she neglected him when the X-Men first moved to San Francisco. He mostly went along with it at first because of the promise of seeing Sofia again, but he becomes sold when he learns that Brian is going to be resurrected. (Also, meeting the OG Hellions was a motivator for sure, but he's a little disappointed when he learns that most of them were just nice, chill people, except for Empath, who he likes at first, but then upon learning how Truly awful he us, despises.) Brian's resurrection ends up proving to be not what he had hoped, because Brian is still a teenager, and is overwhelmed by how much Julian has changed, how much older he is and how all the traumas he went through after Brian's death affected him. When Sofia returns, they get back together very quickly, and while they both have pain about what they both endured after M Day, it gets easier and better for them quickly.

Jay and Laurie become closer after they've both been resurrected, they can both relate to the disconnection from their friends and previous romantic interests due to the age gaps and gaps in experiences. I think they could end up becoming one of those couples who you don't necessarily think would be into each other at first, but they just become close and it ends up working. I think Jay could be a very forgiving person for Laurie, especially because he was never personally attached to the drama she had with Josh and Kevin. I think he could also make her better in a weird way, and she could bring out a much happier side in him.

When Kevin is resurrected on Krakoa, I think he is isolated from the hellions and other academy x kids at first; they all try to forgive him and help him out, but he simply isn't ready to be helped yet. He doesn't want to believe that he was a victim of Selene like they all say, and he hates that they try to treat him as such. Emma however, feels incredibly guilty for what happened to him and as he was like a son to her before m day, she invites him to live in her castle and has a specialized room built for him with no organics. He mostly isolates himself there, especially because the island is almost entirely organic. While there, he interacts with Julian a lot, and while they try to avoid each other at first, they end up becoming like brothers, and Kevin likes interacting with him more than the other people because he doesn't treat him like a victim or walk on egg shells around him, he says things like they are, despite his own guilt complex about what happened to Kevin. Emma considers them both to be like the sons she's never had, so she encourages them to be close again as well.

When Selene is elected onto the council, Emma sends Kevin off of the island, not telling him why, but he agrees to it because he's tired of being cooped up on an island where he can't do much. She pays rent for his apartment, while he goes back to getting a job in a junk yard, and taking online high school classes so he can eventually go to art school. Julian visits him occasionally to hang out, even though its awkward, he's the only person that Kevin allows to make an effort to spend time with him. (Emma is able to keep Kevin well shielded and safe during the Orchis nonsense, of course.)

Okay I'm gonna have to continue this in reblogs lol. See the rbs for more!

[formyloveoflove]

Carmen Berzatto and the Very, Very Bad Work Environment

There is enough space to empathize with Carmen and hold him accountable for his actions. He’s trying very hard to change, but that doesn’t mean he’s not hurting people in the process.

“Hurt people hurt people,” isn’t that how the phrase goes? I don’t think he’s a monster. I do think because of his trauma, he’s tunnel-visioned on the worst parts of himself. And in doing so, he’s isolating himself.

It’s not the “If it’s not perfect, it doesn’t go out.” It’s the condescending tone, the dramatic performance of slamming it in the trash. It’s the anger that’s associated with it. You can still have this ideology without being mean or hurtful about it.

Carmen is stuck in “I’m going to smoke this motherfucker” mode. He views everyone in his staff as competition, and has a tendency to discredit or diminish their capabilities. He demands perfection on a BOH staff of three (?) that only has 1/3 of fine dining experience who have to produce a new menu every day for a failing restaurant. That’s all these different stressors coming into play. That’s

a new arena and standard for Tina, Richie, Marcus, Gary, etc.

with menu changes every day, there’s no comfort to fall into. There’s no rhythm. There’s no way to prepare.

they’re understaffed, so there’s no one coming to save you. sometimes, your calls for “hands” go unanswered. You have to juggle two, three, four things that you just learned to cook. Something’s going to get fucked up, and sent back. And Carmen’s going to yell at you about it. Also, if you want to take a mental health day, it could jeopardizes everything

in the midst of all of this, Richie and Carmen are screaming everyday. They have at least one physical altercation. If you don’t think constantly hearing two people argue all the time is damaging, then ask anybody who grew up in a dysfunctional household. Me, for example.

then the bitter realization that doing all of this is not making them money. My good man Ebra is though (and thank god he got some help bc he was threading water, too)

The Bear is a hostile work environment. Full stop. There’s constant aggression and ridiculing. Once, I worked in a hostile work environment for six months, and it caused me panic attacks, nightmares, and extreme bouts of depression. I cried coming to and from work because i wanted to leave, but I loved the kids that i worked with and i had no other options available. In those situations, “You’re trapped,” no pun intended (well, maybe a little pun intended).

And the consequences of a hostile work environment:

higher rates of stress, anxiety, burnout, depression, and other mental health issues in employees

decreased productivity

high turnover rates - we’re both told about this about the BOH staff and shown the FOH staff. Try counting how many of the wait staff stay in between debriefings

erosion of trust and morale

The course that Carmy’s set sail for is leading him straight to disaster.

There’s a reason we’re shown Carmen’s experience in other successful and starred kitchens that have welcoming environments. There’s a reason why we see Chef Terry shutdown Carmen’s aggression towards Luca. There’s a reason why we get “I think about you too much” and “I don’t think about you at all.” There’s a reason why we get “This place could be different than any other places we’ve been at.”

Now, I don’t think comparing the consequences of Carmy’s actions on those around him to those of Donna’s or NYC Head Chef’s on him is right. Everything happens on a spectrum, and I’m just not for creating hierarchies for people’s hurt in real life, so I try not to do in fictional cases either.

Carmen’s trying to work through some shit, so I’ll give credit where credit is due. I’ll give gold stars to anyone out there, trying to unlearn some negative habits and make themselves better. I’m doing it now, and that shits hard. However, I won’t be giving Carmen a cookie because he didn’t tell his staff to kill themselves like his old boss.

Carmen has to “change the chemistry.” He has to acknowledge that he, himself, is capable of change. And it can’t be because Syd said so. It would be hard for him, but I would love for him to look around and see what he’s done to his own staff and change. Not just want to change but actually change. With his double-guessing to both Syd and Ebra, it might not take him long to get there.

Mikey’s gone. His old chef doesn’t care.

There’s no one else to spite. Carmen has so much anger, resentment, and fear, but he, also, has his moments of happiness and laughter and courage. He, also, has so much love to give.

It’s very hard seeing a character that you love and can relate to become cold and distant and mean to other characters that you love and relate to. But we got another season, so I want to stick around for it.