#he hates track the most though and only does it because ryuji asks him to do training with him

[tricksheart]

FISHING

It's one of his favorite sports of all time besides baseball and swimming, so he dresses the part, even to the extreme. Much to other's chagrin like Goro Akechi. But he can't help but be passionate about something that makes him happy and can invite others to join him.

Ryuji and Kawakami are the biggest examples, but others can join in with him too if they wish to do so, like Yu Narukami for example. Or crossover characters like Noctis from Final Fantasy XV. And if you need help casting lines or finding good spots to actually catch something, he's always ready to give out a helping hand.

Akira wants the experience to be a good one. He doesn't like when people turn down his invites and would probably sulk for a week or two at most, clearly upset. He'll get over the feeling eventually but just don't talk to him those two weeks. Unless he knows you are scared of fish or the water in general in which Akira totally understands. The excuse of it being boring doesn't work on him however. He won't take that shit lying down at all.

[auncyen]

One of my favorite headcanons for Ren’s relationship with his family is half “this can definitely work as headcanon” but also half “this can’t actually play out in canon with the PT realizing the situation without it turning au because the PT realized”.  It was originally thought of for Shuffle Time which is “starts canon, quickly goes au”.

The idea’s changed a little since then, but how it would have played out:

Ren and Ryuji talk about family pretty early on because it’s important to Ryuji.  Ryuji finds out that Ren has parents and a younger sister, but he hasn’t been on good terms with his parents since the arrest and shrugs that his sister probably hates him too now and Ryuji immediately dives for the first new thing that might cheer Ren up, because even if he sounds pretty casual about it, that’s not the sort of thing that ever sounds like “yeah it’s no big”.

Ann doesn’t go in-depth on family because it’s not as important to what her dilemmas are, but she still alludes to her parents being away on business all the time and Ren sympathizes about parents being busy, though it sounds like it’s more long office hours than overseas trips.

Yusuke doesn’t think to ask about this sort of thing until he’s on a tangent about the nature of love and asks about familial love.  Ren’s answer is vague and makes it sound like he’s not close to anyone in his family.  Yusuke has the impression he’s an only child.

Makoto vents once about high expectations from her sister, then asks about Ren’s family, slightly self-conscious that she’s been dominating the conversation.  (And she knows that’s just how conversations with Ren go, but she’s still not used to it.)  Ren sympathizes with the high expectations and mentions always being compared to an older brother.  When Makoto asks more about the brother out of curiosity, he gets vague and says they didn’t exactly grow up together because of the age gap between them.

Morgana is curious about Ren, but family is a sore spot for someone with amnesia getting more and more suspicious he was never human to begin with.  And he’s gleaned enough to know that things aren’t good with the parents because Ren tried calling them about once a week until mid-June, then gave up completely.  So he doesn’t ask.

Family comes up with Futaba very naturally, but when Ren tries to sympathize with her about strained relationships with parents she gets a little...odd.  A couple days later, she asks him questions about family in front of Makoto, who is surprised to hear that his older brother is passed away because it wasn’t mentioned before but expresses condolences.  Futaba, on the other hand, just gets weirder and asks him again about family in front of Ann and Yusuke (and possibly a new Haru).  Ren talks about distant but domineering parents and seems a little confused when Morgana brings up his attempts to call them because why....would he try to call them, he can never guess what time zone they’re in, which gets Ann confused because oh, they do travel overseas?  He didn’t say that before, and Ren seems even more confused now but then recovers and starts explaining when Ryuji comes in.  Ryuji, upon getting caught up on the conversation, asks what his sister does when the parents are overseas, to which Ren stares at him blankly and asks “what sister?”

There’s already enough confusion at the table and it just gets worse with Futaba absolutely losing it.

The thing is, Futaba’s been looking into Ren since the start of his stay with Sojiro.  She knows his family situation, and she knows that the parents don’t work overseas and there never was an older brother, dead or alive.  Ren’s been saying more minor details that don’t seem quite right with what she knows, either.  And she couldn’t quite square him lying when he seemed so sincere in helping her.  Now that she knows more about Morgana, though, and about him losing his memory due to Mementos’ distortions, she’s very worried that there is another possibility.

Because Ren does have a younger sister.  And unless Ren is pulling an awfully long unfunny gag, which doesn’t seem likely with his increasing confusion, Futaba is now worried that at least one PT member has been steadily getting amnesia through their work in the Metaverse.  Ryuji got the most accurate version of Ren’s family at the beginning because he asked first, and afterward Ren’s story got increasingly vague or distorted because he was steadily forgetting and, when a conversation prompted him to recall, trying to relate to whoever he was talking to and unintentionally distorting his recollection to fit that.  Sometimes there was still some basis in truth (his parents are workaholics, he has an older cousin that’s the golden child of the extended family), but it was definitely influenced by whichever friend he was talking to.

Ren’s kind of in denial about this whole thing even being a thing until Futaba calls up his sister and he hears her voice, which is a good enough trigger that he nearly flips too but has to stay calm because he has a younger sister on the phone angry and crying because she hasn’t heard from him for months.  His panicked expression as he tries to calm her down is the last piece of proof the PT could ever need that he really, genuinely forgot, which is. rather terrifying.

So now there’s an agreement that Ren needs to start trying to call his parents again and call his sister too so he doesn’t forget again, but also everyone is pretty worried that maybe they’ve been forgetting things too and didn’t realize?  Except they quickly recognize that the fact they were able to keep track of Ren’s different takes on his family means their memory is better in that respect.  They still put metaverse exploration on hold for a few days for everyone’s peace of mind while they look into this and try to make sure Ryuji, Ann, Yusuke and Makoto have their childhoods straight as far as a person can reasonably be expected to recall, Yusuke getting help from Futaba to get in touch with other pupils, but.....everything seems fine, even though Ryuji and Ann have had just about as much Metaverse exposure as Ren.  Is something different about Ren?  He does have that whole wildcard ability...

Ren offers, hesitantly, that actually.  How they all know he spaces out sometimes in the metaverse?  He’s........kind of going to another place, at least in his mind.  He’s been told it was shaped by his heart.  And he’s never had his rebel outfit on in there or even just regular clothes but a distorted prisoner’s outfit, and he’s easily spent hours and hours in there, accumulated over the months they’ve been Phantom Thieves.

Morgana nearly goes feral on him when this comes out because there is a reason for the thief outfits, THERE IS A REASON, HE TOLD EVERYONE IT WAS PROTECTING THEM FROM DISTORTIONS, WHY WOULD REN THINK IT WAS OKAY THAT HE WAS BEING FORCED TO WEAR SOMETHING ELSE????

But yeah anyway “’Ren is a blank slate’ gets subverted in that he has a concrete background but he’s forgetting it the same way Morgana forgot his” is my favorite headcanon that can’t actually really come to the other PT’s attention without it turning AU.  Staying within canon, this headcanon would result in something like “Ren feels hella weird when he goes back to his hometown and he’s pretty sure it’s not normal to forget this much in only a year, but he doesn’t know what to do about it now, he just wants to go back to Tokyo so the strange feeling goes away”.

[twilightknight17]

Today on P5S!

Time to ritually sacrifice some teenagers to the island god!

But first, we’re taking someone on the ferris wheel. I’ve narrowed it down to Yusuke or Haru.

......

Booooooooo. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Ryuji, I love you dearly but this is not what I wanted.

Time to go get my wife instead. Haru and I had a lovely time. <3

After Zenkichi comes back to let everyone know what went down with Mariko Hyodo, we got a call from Ichinose, who apparently tracked down an old research facility on an island near Okinawa where they were doing... something with EMMA. So we were discussing taking a plane to Okinawa, when all of a sudden, Zenkichi got a call and then declared that we were driving there.

And by that he meant driving 21 hours to Kyoto, and then taking a ferry to Okinawa from Kobe.

At least he volunteered to drive. So we did one last run around Sapporo, getting ready to head out.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

They made a big deal about this building maybe being haunted?? But nothing ever really came of it. I dunno if it was just a fun reference to an IRL thing or what. Might have been a fun sidequest.

We actually got to spend a significant amount of time with Zenkichi while we were trapped in the car for 21 hours, and it was nice to talk to him. He and Makoto talked about her career aspirations. He doesn’t recommend it.

He’s also genuinely regretful about what happened to Akira. And impressed that he didn’t let it break him.

Makoto mentioned that Zenkichi reminds her of her dad. Zenkichi said not to insult her dad by comparing them. You and your self-esteem issues will fit right in, sir. Also all your fussing about red tape and regulations. XD

And then we get to the real reason that we’re going to Kyoto: It’s the anniversary of Zenkichi’s wife’s death, and he was supposed to go with his daughter to visit her grave.

Hello, Akane! My first impression was... weird. Her portrait makes her look like...10. Her model makes her look... idk, 12? Her voice acting makes her sound the Thieves’ age. She’s in her third year of middle school, apparently, which most likely means 13 or 14.

And she can’t stand her dad. X’‘‘DD

The Thieves show up to assure her that no, he’s actually working a really important case right now, and she begrudgingly accepts that. And then we all invite ourselves over to Zenkichi’s house to make curry, because we already love our new little cousin. XDDD Which is only logical, since Zenkichi’s slowly achieving “uncle” status.

The curry was a big hit, though. Akane had fun making it with us.

Zenkichi shut everyone down when they started trying to ask about his wife’s death, and instead asked them to go hang out with Akane in her room for a bit.

.......oh no. OH NO. HE HASN’T BEEN HOME. HE DOESN’T KNOW. HE DOESN’T KNOW.

Darling~

Oh man, she’s so happy to get to talk about the Thieves. Everyone’s a little weirded out at first, but then they’re pretty happy to just let her gush. It’s adorable.

Ryuji, shush. It’s adorable. I love this kid. I want to hug this kid.

She asks us if we want to see the “show”, and we’re all like, “Yeah, we want to see the show”. Turns out the show is a livestream. That she hosts. Using what I believe is a Joker action figure as an avatar. And she does a voice for it. It’s so fucking cute.

I feel so valid about “Featherfans” now.

So valid.

She’s apparently been doing this since last year, and the kids never bothered to check literally anything other than the phan-site. They sounded so surprised to see that they had fans in other corners of the internet. XD

Makoto offered to help her study after that. We’ve totally adopted this kid into the family. She’s also willing to actually talk about what happened to her mom. Apparently her mom got hit by a car, and the guy was never arrested, because his secretary killed herself and left a note taking the blame? Even though Akane apparently saw the guy hit her mom. And she hates her dad because she feels like he gave up.

They didn’t exactly reconcile before we left for Okinawa, but I think we made some progress on that front. Zenkichi’s a good guy, and Akane’s a sweet kid. They deserve to be happy.

Onward to Okinawa!

Futaba claims she’s mimicking the “famous movie pose” and then launches into the first two words of “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston. Immediately, at least one person points out that literally everything she’s doing is wrong.

Kokujima, the little island we’re actually going to, is really nice! The lab that we’re looking for is apparently closed until tomorrow, so instead, we’re spending the day at the beach! Swimming! Seashells! Fish! Taking Sophia underwater! Watermelon smashing! Convincing Zenkichi to chill! Barbecue!

Before we got to the beach, Zenkichi was on the phone with his boss, who reminded him that he’s not just using the Phantom Thieves to catch the real mastermind, he’s also keeping them close so that he can present them when the police finally do need a culprit.

It’s too late for that, lady. We’re on a family vacation. We met his kid. His kid will be heartbroken if he turns us in. We turned him into a sand mermaid. It was great.

We were going to explore some side path, but Zenkichi convinced us not to, because it was hallowed ground. Land that people believe is sacred. We shouldn’t go there; it would probably deeply offend the locals. And the god that lives there.

“Reverence of the incomprehensible is deeply ingrained in human consciousness. Well, I’m sure you all have no interest in pissing off a god today. Let’s all listen to the sign and get outta here.”

I mean... We’ve established, I think, that fighting Cthulhu would be a bad idea, but if we piss off the god, we can just shoot it? But okay, okay. Whatever you say, uncle.

He gets very distracted during dinner, though. And then warns us about the locals looking at us funny.

And then the game shifts to a horror game.

Late at night, the guy from the bike shop slams into the window of the RV, looking inside. He opens the door and creeps in, heading for the bunks. He yanks off the covers... and finds a stack of pillows arranged to look like someone sleeping. And so he starts yelling that the RV is empty, and they have to find us.

People have literal goddamn torches. People are yelling about sacrificing us to their god.

Apparently we trespassed on “hallowed ground”. This is it. This is the scene from the trailer where they’re hiding in the bushes. The context is apparently that these people literally want to kill us for daring to go near the lab. We had to flee, and the only really safe place was the lab.

We knocked out the one guy we found there and went through his phone, and he’d had a change of heart. We found the name and the keyword and fled to the metaverse, because as Ann put it, even a Jail would be safer than the island in the middle of the night.

...I should have cooked more food. ^_^;;;

The Jail was apparently “sleeping” until now, which... makes me think that the Monarch isn’t even here, but the Desires they stole remain.

You know that bit in Undertale where you’re skipping merrily along and then you hit the True Lab and everything just goes completely tonally sideways? Yeah. This is a haunted lab. An abandoned haunted lab. It’s spooky as hell, and we can’t go back to reality.

Lavenza wanted to chat for a minute, and was... unhelpful. X’D

She stops herself after this, saying that she’s only supposed to observe, and that I need to find the thing on my own. And then gave me a new kind of fusion.

We’re just in the entrance, and Makoto’s already not doing well in the spooky lab. She gets to cling onto Joker’s leg again, and Zenkichi gets to ask if we’re a thing, which... That wasn’t funny the first time, Atlus. X’D Let her cling onto someone else’s leg. Haru was right there. So was Ryuji.

Zenkichi’s said he’s gonna hang in the entrance because this is “our turf”, which is probably for the best, so we don’t have to protect him in a fight. And Sophia... heard someone calling her and ran off into the lab. So tomorrow we’ve gotta venture into the spooky lab to find her.

Lovely.

[cherubchoirs]

(anon idk WHAT happened to the formatting of this ask when i drafted it, it got...WEIRD...so i had to answer this way lmao)

MAJOR P5R SPOILERS UNDER THE READ MORE!

god yea that would have been such a good point to split over as well, given the different dreams and motivations of the characters because i mean…futaba, makoto, and haru ALL had parents brought back to be with them…not to get into It on main but i’ve lost a parent, very traumatically, and…that would be so hard to say no to, because it would be like you’re losing them all over again and it’s your fault. it would feel like they don’t matter to you, that your strength or growth or morals or WHATEVER is more important than their life, and even if you’re giving up some sense of justice, that feels so abstract compared to someone being alive again. like. it’s not for you in a way, it’s for them…and ann has the same dilemma, but in a different sense. shiho could be safe, completely unharmed by that monster, and so it’s not about ann and her morals or ethics, it’s about protecting shiho and taking that pain away from her. central to their wish is another living, breathing human being, someone that could be saved from a life cut short or from one of the most horrible traumas a person can endure. compare that to ryuji, yusuke, and morgana - i don’t say their wishes are lesser or should be downplayed in ANY way, nothing like that as they’re just as important, but they are more centered on themselves, making the decisions perhaps easier for them. ryuji has his mom to consider - if he gives up his track scholarship for reality, it could harm her in that sense, but she will live and ryuji is already determined to keep working hard for her in whatever way he can. for yusuke, his mom is also a factor because with madarame as he is in the dream reality, she truly did die in an accident and her work is recognized…but yusuke stated his mother wouldn’t have wanted fame or glory like that, and madarame will atone for what he did to her. the biggest weight would most likely be the other students though - if he returns to the true reality, those students will have been harmed once again, including the student that took his own life. that would be a heavy choice for yusuke, but they aren’t people central to his wish, unlike futaba, haru, makoto, and ann, and i think in yusuke’s eyes, he would view it as denying their own struggles and strength of character without their consent. finally, morgana’s is totally centered on himself, not in a bad way but it just means he has no one else to consider when he decides to return to reality. he’ll lose his humanity, but he’s already looking for a way to change on his own and nothing about this is life or death for him or anyone he cares for. (also i want to say again that i’m not minimizing the choice any of them have to make here, as all of their dreams represent how they can be happiest and they’re all severely traumatized kids that deserve that happiness, i just think what they have to weigh and consider are different between the two groups. it was heartbreaking watching all of them lose their dreams, no matter what that dream was because it truly was what was most important to them and all of their pain is just as real and just as terrible giving that up)

and it’s perfect that akira is the one that needs to bring the group back together - his wish was also for someone he lost to come back, but he stands firm in his conviction to return to the way things were, no matter that cost. i…really loved how this played out in game because i found that with the way i play and characterize akira, he always sided with goro and agreed with every point he made, including the point that he needed to go. akira loves him, but this reality isn’t right, it’s an insult to what they’ve all suffered, and he would never let it stand. this along with the fact too that he would never want to suffer the same fate that goro is, brought back as a part of someone else’s schemes to be used as some kind of bargaining chip, and so he totally understands and agrees with goro’s sentiments on the matter. but he would acknowledge how much that hurts, how shitty it is that they’re being forced to make this choice and honestly, it’s just some emotional blackmail on maruki’s part to make them feel as though they’re now responsible for losing their parents or making others suffer. what happened in reality wasn’t fair…but what happened happened, and it’s not their place to decide for the whole reality how they will live. because if they choose that world, yes they save their parents or their friends, but everyone will be under maruki’s rule, everyone’s struggles and everyone’s growth is robbed of them, and humanity remains stagnant, spied on, intruded on to the point that no one’s life is their own, and that’s the exact reason they fought against yaldabaoth. it’s not the world they promised the public or each other, and they cannot accept a future for themselves or anyone else crafted by a single person that would control all of their fates. because life is messy, life is hard, life is unfair, but that is life, and so without all of those things, they’re not really living. it would hurt him incredibly to fight against his friends and i think he would do everything he could to impress on them why they need to let this reality go (of course this is all from how my akira chooses, but i would also LOVE the desperation he would have fighting against the team that’s choosing the good ending. an akira broken down by grief and the unfair burden of leadership is always interesting to me, and i think the tenacity and the brutality he’d be capable of in those moments would be terrifying).

BUT OOF bad end for shuake here really does hurt…just the idea of akira becoming the one to betray goro is painful. to have goro place his trust in him like that, have him believe he’s going to follow through, and then to have akira turn on him just like he once did…i can only imagine what they might say to each other in that moment skdfdhg and as a little bit of a tangent on that, it just made me think of how i find it interesting that in the bad end where akira chooses to maintain maruki’s reality, goro seems…fine? happy? like he wants to be there and be a part of the group. it makes me wonder how that turn around happened since he is so sure of what he wants and it seems as though he would truly hate akira for choosing that path, but it’s probably that maruki changed his cognition just like all the others to not see anything wrong with this reality. it seems likely that goro’s wish is to be accepted and find people that love and care about him for who he truly is and, without his memory of how he came to be there, goro probably would actually be happy with the thieves. it gives him everything he’s ever wanted, to be surrounded by support and not having to hide who he is, but i feel that treads such a fine line of morality with maruki’s reality, more than many other parts of it. it is partly to grant goro’s wish, if i’m correct about what it is (i could definitely be wrong, since goro’s wish could just as easily be full autonomy given his character arc in the third semester), but it’s also so self-serving for maruki and for akira.

[kareofbears]

blinding lights, chapter 3/4

Their height gap is a wide one, but in no way is Sumire going to let Akechi keep looking down on her. “It became my business the minute we wanted the same thing: to fix this reality.“

—

Akechi and Sumire have to traverse through the events of the third semester without Akira (or rather, against him).

read on ao3 or under the cut!

——

On a technical standpoint, rain doesn’t bother Akechi.

Whenever it rains, no matter if it was just a drizzle or a downpour, people scramble to the nearest overhang, praying that they don’t get drenched. Such a trivial thing to get panicked by, he thought. City rain like this was hardly something to fear, yet it remains a constant in societal culture—water starts falling from the sky and people stop whatever they’re doing to duck for cover.

And since Akechi had long since accepted to reform himself into the mold of society rather than the other way around, here he was, in the middle of Kichijoji, shoulders pressed back against the building of Darts & Billboards, waiting for the rain to tire itself out.

Out of all the habits he’s practiced and perfected from his days of deceit, it’s strange that hiding out from rainfall is one of the few that he still can’t shake, inconsequential as it was. He had learned that mimicking what can be considered societal norms and exercised it in everyday life can at least trick most people that he, Akechi Goro, can be lumped in with the norms and be heightened to excellence later on. People hid from droplets and because the path of normalcy is what he wanted, he decided that he’ll hide with them.

It took him a long time to narrow down why it bothered him. Why, for some reason, it had pissed him off that idiots would commit to such an insignificant action. It’s because when people run for cover, when they prioritize the act of hiding over everything else, they’re essentially allowing the rain—this overall harmless entity—to prevent them from reaching their destination. Fools let their decisions be dictated by the weather, wasting their time waiting it out, letting themselves be dictated beyond their control.

It’s a product of the collective unconscious; rather than pushing past the drizzle to reach their destination, or continue living their life as it were before the storm clouds rolled in, the masses decided that the better decision was to cease all movements because it would be easier. When it rains, society comes at a standstill.

“D’you always just stand in the middle of the promenade lookin’ pissed, or am I just lucky?”

Akechi blinks and turns his head to see a patch of bright, blond hair with an even brighter grin. His purple hood was pulled up, but it’s too short that it does little to block out the downpour.

Sakamoto Ryuji stands in front of him, completely drenched and unbothered.

“I’d hardly call it luck, so much as a coincidence.” Flicking his eyes downward, Ryuji adjusts the heavy looking plastic bags hanging off of his wrists. “And you?”

“Doing some grocery shopping for my ma. She’s been real busy at work, so…” he shrugs.

It really was a strange coincidence that he shows up like this, unprompted. The universe, if it ever was sentient, had never thrown him a bone. However, for Ryuji to show up, it almost seems like a waste to let it go.

If he’s been wanting to see Sakamoto up close, this is as good as it’s gonna get.

“How do you feel about joining me in some people-watching?” Akechi asks.

Ryuji’s eyes light up. “Sure! These bags are getting heavy anyway, could use a break.” He dodges a stream of water flowing cleanly from the gutter and joins Akechi underneath the overhang. Whether he can sense Akechi’s discomfort or perhaps it’s a feeling residing from the real reality, Ryuji had kept a gap of about a meter between the two.

“I hope I didn’t take you away from any pressing matters, Sakamoto.”

“Nah,” he gently sets down his bags before turning to give Akechi his full attention. “Don’t got much waiting for me back home with my ma at work, but can’t stay for too long,” he nods his head down to his bags. “She’d kick my ass if I let the milk go bad.”

Ryuji laughs, shoulders shaking. “But y’know, I see you hangin’ with ‘Kira sometimes, and any friend of that bastard is a friend of mine. And, uh, speaking of…” With an expression of guilt and reluctance so tremulous that Akechi can only compare it to a child getting caught with their hand in a cookie jar. “That’s kinda what I wanted to talk to you about.”

Yes, technically he’s an unforgivable hypocrite for advising Sumire against speaking to Ryuji, but that won’t stop him from getting the information he needs. (It never has.)

After all, there must be something special about Sakamoto in order to have Kurusu Akira wrapped around his finger.

“Oh?” he responds.

“Yeah, it, uh, might be a bit awkward so I’ll do my best to be straight about it,” Ryuji looks embarrassed, but determined. “I know the feeling of not wanting to say something, to have it weigh you down and shit. Basically, what I’m tryna say is: you don’t just gotta rely on Akira!”

Akechi’s eyes widen. It should’ve been impossible. How did he figure out about Akira and the other reality when he hasn’t even been snapped out of it—

“You looked super stressed back in New Year’s and I get that you’d rather talk to Akira, but he’s a busy guy. And I know we aren’t close, but if you want to vent, or just, I dunno, get some ramen together?” he shrugs and throws a smile in Akechi’s direction. “I’m here for you.”

Akechi’s face is carefully blank. He’s wrong, because of course Sakamoto didn’t figure it out. (Has he ever figured anything out?)

He had done extensive research on the Thieves the second he got a whiff of who they might be, and that was especially the case for the initial members of the group. Sakamoto Ryuji, a second-year in the now infamous Shujin Academy. Formerly the star of the track team, his leg was snapped beyond repair by Kamoshida, the Thieves’ initial target. While he had always possessed a temper, it had grown exponentially when the teacher had faced no charges and he was shunned by the rest of the school. It’s like the Boy Who Cried Wolf—except there had undoubtedly been a wolf, and the boy ended up with a lifetime’s worth of permanent damage.

At first, he had chalked up Ryuji’s temper as yet another weakness—Akechi had learned firsthand just how fast the hand of authority strikes if one were to place a toe out of line. It’s how he decided to perfect the weapon of deceit. Akechi learned from his mistakes, to the point that his heart had split itself into two people he could become: Loki as his true self, and Robin Hood as who he needs to be.

Even Akira had understood the hubris of exposing himself, had felt the same punishment that Akechi was subjected to (ironically by the same person). In a world where a mask can be the difference between life and death, Akechi and Akira had decided to be its executioner rather than the one subjected to the sharp end of the guillotine.

By the nature of these rules, Ryuji should have been beheaded. And he was.

But instead of learning his lesson the way Akechi and Akira had, he had been rejuvenated. Instead of bending to the will of authority, he let that pressure mold him into something tougher, let the anger inside him fester and grow.

It had made sense, in hindsight, why Ryuji had treated him the way he did (it’s not like Akechi had the best intentions). So seeing him like this, where he never found out Akechi’s true personality, allowed him to see Ryuji in his natural state.

A feeling surges within Akechi, so foreign that it takes him slightly too long just to name it. All around him, deep in his gut, spread all the way to the tips of his fingers and his toes is wave after wave of…

“I’m done here,” Akechi says.

Discomfort.

“Huh?” Ryuji cocks his head. “Uh, was that weird of me to say? My bad, Ann’s always said I had a big, fat mouth. Sorry, yeah we aren’t close and stuff. Just thought it’d be nice—”

Akechi holds back a click of his tongue and, with a little effort, morphs his expression into one of false platitudes and plasticity. A slight quirk in his lips (not too high or it’ll scare them), tilt his head at a certain angle, and raise his voice an octave to indicate an apology. “Sorry to leave so suddenly. Thank you for your time.”

The rain had stopped sometime during their conversation and he hates that the universe seemed like it had taken pity on him.

Ryuji says something to him, but Akechi refuses to listen to another word—he doesn’t need to. He got what he wanted. All it took was one conversation for Akechi to know exactly what Akira sees in him.

That incessant authenticity and kindness shouldn’t exist in a world like this. It shouldn’t have existed in an angry boy like him.

Akechi tries (and fails) to look like he isn’t running away.

It was only when he was in bed later that night that he realized he didn’t find out what Ryuji’s wish was. Given the way he said Akira’s name though, Akechi didn’t have to think too hard.

—

AG: The biggest gray area in this has to be with Niijima Makoto YS: wow. I didn’t think you’d be straight-forward with your relationship with her. thank you for your honesty. YS: you both must have a difficult history with one another :( AG: What are you talking about? AG: I’m saying I don’t know where to find her. YS: ah. i see. YS: haha how about we just pretend that never happened?

They checked Shujin Academy (closed for winter break), Aoyama Itchome (for good measure), and finally the bookstore in Central Street (the smell of books is so lovely) before Akechi began to lose his temper.

“It wouldn’t be a huge surprise if we just found her in the middle of Tokyo University impersonating a research assistant as some sad excuse to feel some adrenaline for the first time in her life,” he says as they walk down the escalator, prepared to hop on the train and try somewhere else.

Sumire frowns. “Being studious doesn’t make someone boring.”

“Of course it doesn’t. Kurusu is at the top of his class and a huge public nuisance. No, Niijima’s absolutely underneath the sole of academics and government propaganda from her father since day one.”

“You don’t like her?”

“I don’t like anyone,” he replies. “Especially not someone so tied with practicing law like she plans to.”

They round the corner. “You can talk to her about that yourself.”

Standing by the overpriced-looking smoothie bar is Niijima Makoto, accompanied by a beautiful older woman who looks like she can melt down a rusted car with a single glare.

“I would think that Sae-san would quite actually murder me if I were to bring that up.”

“You know the other woman?”

“It would be rude not to know my co-workers after all,” says Akechi. “That’s prosecutor Niijima Sae—Makoto’s sister as well as one of the Thieves’ targets from the past.”

Sumire ponders over the odds for a second. “Did she happen to have a casino as a Palace?”

He pauses. “Yes. As a matter of fact, she did.”

“Amazing! What luck!” she beams. “May I try and guess what their wish may be?”

“Is this nothing but a game to you?” he says immediately, before stopping himself. “…One guess.”

Brows scrunching together, she leans towards him, shoulders sagged as if she was carrying a secret so heavy that it physically weighed her down. Poker chips, alcohol bottles, and slot machines… “Did Makoto-senpai wish for Sae-san’s gambling addiction to go away?”

Akechi stares at her. “Who was it again that taught you how Palaces work?”

“Morgana-senpai.”

“If that’s the case, I’m simply over the moon that he didn’t join us on our mission.” They walk towards the Niijimas, who were still chatting amicably with one another. “Their father passed when they were young; it left their family jaded, it was traumatizing, et cetera, I’m sure you get the gist.”

“Wait, I really don’t—”

“Akechi? What a coincidence!”

The sisters greeted them with kind eyes and soft smiles, and Sumire has to accept that she’s out of her league for this one—the student council president may have been a common name around school, but it hardly ever came with more information other than how good her grades were, as well as the potential ‘narc’ comment. But despite what Akechi thinks, no Phantom Thief could possibly be on the side of the police; they’ve all had enough firsthand experience with that particular institution to see just how often the system has failed them.

Akechi nods. “It truly is,” he says, as if they hadn’t spent half the day walking around Tokyo scrounging for them. “This is Yoshizawa Sumire, Sae-san.”

“Pleasure to meet you!”

“Likewise,” Sae says.

“I have to admit, I’m quite surprised to see you here,” Akechi says. “Did we interrupt you both?”

“Not at all. We were just doing some grocery shopping for dinner tonight. Our father’s been having a craving for teriyaki,” she answers. “Why so surprised, Akechi?”

“Nothing in particular,” he says, and Sumire can feel his smugness radiating from where she’s standing. Well, he is a detective, so she’s not too shocked. “It’s simply refreshing to see you spending time with your family, despite being as busy as you are.” With a tilt of his head, he turns to Makoto. “I haven’t heard about your father for a long time.”

Makoto recoils a little, and winces. “My…father? No, wait, dad’s been gone for…It doesn’t make any sense…:

Sumire nearly startles when Makoto suddenly straightens up, gaze clouded. Akechi clicks his tongue.

“Sorry,” she says, a bit dizzily, already taking a step back. “Sae and I need to make it to the grocery store before it closes.”

Sumire waves half-heartedly and sighs when they’re gone. “Niijima-senpai perhaps had the most graceful escape so far,” she comments.

Pulling back his sleeve, Akechi peers at his watch. “It’s two pm. She could’ve done better,” he scoffs. “It’s a shame. I had high hopes for her to be the first one. She’s the only one in that circus who had more than one brain cell and isn’t named Kurusu.”

“…May I ask you something?”

“You’re already asking a question, just ask it.”

Sumire rocks back and forth on her heels. “Why do you call him that?”

“Because that’s his name?”

“Last name,” she corrects. “Why not call him by his first name?”

“What kind of question is that? Is this a test? A trial to prove that I’m willing to be honest?” Sumire stays silent. “Alright then, if it’ll help you sleep at night. I can’t possibly fathom how you still haven’t figured out that he and I aren’t as buddy-buddy as you think.”

“Well, yes, I know that but—”

“And you?”

Her heart rate skyrockets. “What about me?”

“You call him by his surname as well, even topped off with a ‘senpai’ at the end,” Akechi raises a brow. “Why not on a first name basis?”

“W-we aren’t that close!” she exclaims. “That’s reserved for people who’s close to him, like a good friend, or a girlf—boyfr—partner. We just… aren’t that.”

“Strange, isn’t it?” Akechi says. “We aren’t even on a first name basis with him, yet here we are; fresh from New Year’s, running around Tokyo for his friends who should be doing this instead.”

(Sumire very nearly says it, what’s been on her mind since Maruki’s Palace. But as it stands, she doesn’t want to ruin the foundation—very unstable, can most definitely blow away with a strong gust of wind, but a foundation nonetheless—that she and Akechi reluctantly built.)

“Yes, it really is strange.”

—

AG: Are you particularly close with Okumura? YS: unfortunately not, no. i’ve heard about what happened to her father, though. Perhaps her wish is related to his passing. AG: …Yes, I believe it is. I would think that the two of them would look at ways of expanding the Big Bang business. So basically, Tokyo Hotspots. YS: kichijoji? that place is always bustling YS: not to mention, i’d love for them to open up there. their milkshakes are incredible ( ◜‿◝ )♡ AG: Good call. We’ll try there first then. AG: At any rate, it will be a very quick confrontation with her.

“So I’ve been thinking—”

“A dangerous pastime, but go on.”

Sumire huffs without heat as they traverse Kichijoji—busy even in this time of year, though in no small part because of the shrine nearby. “We’ve been doing this…” What are they doing? “Saving our known reality business for nearly a week now. It hasn’t been going the best.”

Neither of them need a reminder that their victory ratio is currently at a strong zero to six. “So maybe we need to change it up a bit! I thought up a strategy last night that I think we should implement today,” she beams up at him.

Akechi’s gaze can wither flowers. “Do you need me to explain how idiotic that sounds?”

“Oh, come on Akechi! We need all the help we can get, especially since we only have two left. Plus, you haven’t even heard the strategy. Would you like to hear it?”

She doesn’t wait for his response before eagerly pushing through. “I understand and accept that you’re a bit ruthless, which is great! Well, great if that’s who you are. And since you called me a goody two shoes that one time, I figured we can go with that.” Sumire steps in front of Akechi and raises her hands to the sky, chin tilted upwards. “We can do the ‘good guy, bad guy’ strategy! That’s what we’ve been doing anyway. It can be like Zootopia.”

A silence stretches out—Sumire’s grin unfaltering and Akechi’s perfectly blank.

Then, “What the fuck is a Zootopia?

“Did you not watch that movie? It was pretty big.”

“Do I look like someone who’d watch a documentary on the animal kingdom?” His eyes zero in on something. “Lucky us, we found them.”

Okumura Haru stands with whom Sumire can only assume is her father. The speak amicably with each other, adoration radiating off of them as they point and gesture at the various businesses around the promenade.

“Don’t forget the strategy,” she whispers.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he responds sarcastically.

A feeling of optimism blossoms in Sumire’s chest as they approach the Okumuras. Maybe it’s the nice weather, or it’s another opportunity to finally achieve their goal of gaining one of Akira’s allies. Mostly though, she chalks it up as relief that even though it’s far from perfect, Akechi’s finally starting to let down the drawbridge, bit by bit.

And that’s when Haru decides to look in their direction.

Instead of the initial small talk, the breadcrumbs that hint towards their other reality, instead of gently edging them to the truth, Haru had completely bypassed all of that. A feeling of deja vu tugs strangely at Sumire as she takes in her expression—the usual confusion and pained tightening of the brows, but this time, a raw, unquestionable fury morphs onto her features.

It’s a near-perfect replica of Futaba’s expression.

After a few seconds, Haru says something to her father, and they leave, leaving Akechi and Sumire mid-stride in the middle of the promenade.

Another silence reigns over them, heavy and suffocating despite the bustle of Kichijoji.

“We didn’t even need to talk to her,” Akechi says. “An efficient failure.” The silence stretches on. “You have something to say..”

Sumire shoots him a dark look. “Alley,” she says, voice uncharacteristically low. “It might upset the families if we speak rudely in front of them.”

She leads them to the backstreets, where most stores are closed until the nightlife crowd rolls in. It was empty, and only the metal shutters and stray plastic bags strewn about the pavement were present to hear them.

“Of course I have something to say,” Sumire says, fists clenched tightly at her sides. “You promised back at Leblanc. You said that you won’t withhold information from me anymore, for the sake of the mission.”

She points behind her in the direction of where the Okumura’s left. “Despite what you may like to believe, I’m not an idiot who won’t notice something as obvious as Okumura-senpai running away the second she sees you. She didn’t even speak to us before she ran, which is considerably worse than Sakura-chan.” Sumire’s eyes narrow. “What are you still hiding from me?”

Throughout her speech, Akechi didn’t even blink. “Has it occurred to you that I simply lied when I made that pesky promise to you, or are you still the same person who fell right into Maruki’s waiting hands last spring?”

Sumire recoils as if she’d been hit. “Don’t bring that up, it has nothing to do with this—”

“Doesn’t it?” his voice is cold. “Isn’t the reason why you’re so desperate for me to be open with you is that you have some sort of trust issues?”

“That’s not it.”

“Finally we’re getting somewhere,” Akechi’s red eyes seem to be glowing despite the darkness in the shadowed alley. With a sickening feeling, she realizes he’s enjoying this. “Let me take a guess. You’re doing this out of the goodness of your heart, an overflowing kindness that you have to act on and spread across the globe. And, if you’re simply good and lucky enough, maybe, just maybe, your beloved ‘Kurusu-senpai’ will look away from his little group long enough to see how sweet and kind you are—”

“Shut up,” she cuts him off. Her voice is slow and deliberate. “You want to know what I’m doing this for? It’s because I’m sick and tired of these hellish lies.”

Akechi stays quiet as she continues, struggling to speak while her eyes blazed with fury. “I basically just found out that I’m not who I thought I was for the past ten months. Do you know what that feels like? It’s like if someone kidnapped me, shoved me in the back of a van, blindfolded. Maruki, bless his soul, forced me to believe whatever garbage he thought was best for me. It makes me sick to think that I fell for that reality, never once did I question it.”

She clenches her jaw. “You know what I want, Akechi? It’s not the philanthropy you’re so obsessed with, or senpai’s affection. What I want is my kidnapper to fail. I want him to regret what he did to me, to stop what he’s doing to everyone else. Even if his intentions were good, I am not going to let him get away with this,” Sumire looks directly into Akechi’s eyes. “And you are not going to be the one to slow me down.”

Chest heaving, she realizes she’s breathless. After a brief pause, Akechi speaks.

“Our motivations aren’t too far off from one another,” his voice is strangely cool, as if his fury and long since dissipated from the surface and had manifested into something sharp and dangerous. “You said you’re tired of the lies? Of being used like some kind of puppet, a test subject? Of having the rug pulled from you just because someone fucking felt like it? Good. But our similarities stop there.”

He leans back against the metal gate of a closed bar. “At the root of it, you want to stop Maruki so that he doesn’t push his beliefs to anyone else. Whether you like it or not, your motivation is accidental philanthropy. I could not give less of a shit about Maruki, or Tokyo, or even the rest of this damned world. I just want to be able to live in a reality where I get to choose what I want to do.”

“So let me help you!” she exclaims, frustrated. “Some detective, you are—keeping secrets isn’t going to help this situation.”

“You still don’t get it, do you? I tried to make this as easy to understand as possible, but I guess I just have to make it obvious.” Akechi straightens up and from the smirk resting on his mouth and the way his brow is lifted, condescension is simply dripping from him. Sumire refuses to recoil. “I don’t care if you want to help me. I am a selfish person who does what he wants. I’m willing to tear down anyone in my path, use anyone in my way, if it means that I get what I want.”

“Maybe you are!” Sumire says. “A selfish person, I mean.”

Akechi blinks, and throws his head back, loud laughter echoing through the alley. “‘Maybe I am?’” He laughs again, nearly doubling over. When he sobers up a bit, she has to force herself not to flinch. It’s as if something had unhinged in Akechi and she’s seeing the result of that—his eyes are twinkling as his smirk stretches even further over his face; an edged grin. “Do you need an example, Yoshizawa? Proof? Citation for what I’ve done just so you can understand? Look forward to it, since you’ll learn at long last why Sakura and Okumura took one look at me and fled.”

Bending over slightly so that he’s eye-level with Sumire, he announces: “I killed Sakura Futaba’s mother and Okumura Haru’s father. I am a murderer.”

“So am I.”

Akechi stops breathing, blinking as he processes what Sumire just said. She only looks back through narrowed eyes, daring him to say something.

When he doesn’t, she relaxes a bit. “Are you in the mood for darts? Since we finished with Okumura-senpai much earlier than expected, we have some time. And besides,” Sumire brushes her bangs out of her eyes. “There’s more to discuss, and I’m not really feeling this alley anymore.”

—

“It’s different. You must know that it’s different.”

Sumire waits until she gets their darts from behind the counter. “I know.”

Darts & Billiards was never particularly full, but it was never empty either. There were a few groups, pairs, and serious soloists that filled the entire room with indecipherable chatter and the loud clack of eight-balls colliding with one another. Anything that Akechi and Sumire might talk about thankfully gets shrouded by the white noise.

“Any preferences?” she says, waving around the dart in her hands.

“701,” he says immediately. “Anything lower is child’s play.”

Sumire nods as she inputs the settings. “Kurusu-senpai said something before he went with Dr. Maruki,” she began. “He said that he was doing this for his friends—the Thieves, myself,” she glances back. “And in his words, ‘especially you.’”

“And what of it?” Akechi asks.

“I believe that Kurusu-senpai knows of your past, knows your struggles and whatever you’ve gone through. I can only guess what you’ve had to endure, and how it led you to what you did to their parents.” Sumire offers him his set of darts. “May I go first?”

Akechi nods and she takes her stance—despite everything, she’s a little nervous playing darts with someone who actually plays to win.

Sumire throws it as best she can when Akechi speaks. “Does it justify it, then? If my life was difficult enough, would you give me a pass for killing innocent people?”

“No,” she casts another dart. “It doesn’t. Nothing really justifies that.” Pinching her last dart between her fingers, she fiddles as she thinks. “But I accidentally killed my sister over my incompetence in gymnastics.”

“But that’s the difference,” Akechi waves his hand. “It wasn’t an accident that they died by my hands. I had planned it, plotted it, and accomplished it. What you did wasn’t deliberate; it was a spur of the moment decision to run into traffic.”

Sumire hurls her final dart a little harder than usual. “I didn’t say that you should be forgiven, Akechi! I mean, I still don’t forgive myself. But even if it is different, I can at least understand your sentiments a fraction better than anyone else can. Do I think that it’s fine that two people who’re the same age as us lost their parents? Of course not. It makes me ill just thinking about it.”

She walks to the board and gingerly plucks off her darts. “But if I tried to pretend that I don’t understand what you’ve done—that isn’t right, either.”

He has a thoughtful expression on his face, his darts rolling between his fingers similar to how people fidget with loose change; Sumire hadn’t even known it was possible to do that. “Interesting.”

Stepping up to the mat, Akechi tilts his body sideways, obviously practiced in the game. His expression doesn’t change when it lands on a triple twenty.

“Do you regret it?”

His hand is steady as he throws—another triple twenty. “The murders? It depends.”

“On?”

“Do I regret being caught, used, and humiliated by losers who I thought were beneath me? Yes. Do I regret ending the lives of many?” casting his third dart, it lands so close to the others that they wobble in unison. “No. Not really.”

Sumire’s next round was a silent one, Akechi’s confession playing on repeat in her mind. He had simply said it with no hesitation; his tenor hadn’t changed, posture didn’t shift. The words that flowed out of him had no emotion whatsoever—they were clinical, like a doctor stating the facts to a terminal patient.

The ongoing background noise paid no mind to their silence, stuck in its blissful ignorance despite the pair’s topics. If there’s one guarantee in this world, it’s that it’s extremely likely that no one will listen just as the conversation is getting important.

Akechi’s on his second turn when he says, “You took well to the fact that I’ve killed in cold blood.”

“I knew that you were hiding something,” she says. “It’s because of how you act. You were a little cruel back in the Palace, and while it’s no excuse, people who have…” she scratches her head. “A hardened heart usually has a nasty past, and what Kurusu-senpai said only confirmed it.”

No matter how many times he does it, Sumire still gets impressed by his casual triple twenty.

Swapping places with him, she closes one eye as she ponders over her strategy. “But despite the fact that you’re a ruthless sort of person—” her dart sails forward and sticks to the board. “I’m willing to look past it if it means we can change reality.” Sumire cocks her head at him. “Can you?”

Akechi stays silent as Sumire launches another dart—one more and they can win it. “Selfish is what we call ourselves, right?” she says. “That we’re only in it for yourselves, regardless of what happens to everyone else. If we work together and it raises the odds of getting what we want, doesn’t that still play into the fact that we’re acting for our own benefit?”

She lines herself up for the last point, and takes a deep breath. “What did you call it? Accidental philanthropy?” she throws her dart and watches as it curves beautifully—only for it to miss her mark by quarter-inch. “Oh no!”

“Accidental philanthropy…” he muses, indifferent to their loss. “That doesn’t sound half-bad.”

Sumire raises her eyebrows, skeptical. “Really?”

“I know that my past actions may have dictated our failure to some extent. That was my fault,” Akechi crosses his arms. “I won’t let it happen again.”

Maybe she was too forgiving, or too trusting, or maybe it’s the closest she’ll get as an apology out of Akechi, but she finds herself nodding. “That’s all I wanted.”

He moves to put on his coat. “Was it to your satisfaction?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve wanted to talk even before we discovered Maruki’s schemes,” he shoves his arms through his coat sleeves. “Are you satisfied”

“Pretty much,” Sumire nods. “I understand you much better than before, at least.”

Collecting his darts, he heads to the register. “Why do you want to understand?”

“…Because I’m curious. You changed so abruptly, I didn’t even know who you were anymore—not that I did to begin with. Not to mention, the people Kurusu-senpai knows are always interesting, and you’re definitely not an exception.”

Akechi turns, and from the doubt on his features, he doesn’t take the bait.

“Fine. That wasn’t a lie, though. I just…” she hesitates, and decides to throw caution to the wind. “I want to get to know my teammate better.”

Anything could’ve happened in that beat of silence, much to the ignorance of the loitering patrons.

“See,” he replies. “Now that I can believe. And here I thought I was the only one who needed to practice honesty more.”

He walks back to register. “I’ll handle the bill. Call it a repaying of debts, in a way.”

“For what?”

“That’s what teammates do, don’t they?”

Sumire feels herself smile widely. It had only taken about six days, their entire reality shifting, and a busted game of darts, but it finally feels like she and Akechi are fighting the same battle.

—

AG: If it all goes to plan, we should’ve at least been able to convince one of them AG: As much as it truly pains me to say it, putting our faith in them is our best chance at success. AG: Worse comes to worst, there’s a reason why we’re making him the last one to convince. He’s our trump card. YS: you mean sakamoto-senpai? AG: Ugh, don’t make me say it.

According to Akechi’s knowledge of Ryuji’s whereabouts (as unhappy as he was to recite it), there are two places that he frequents—the arcade in Shibuya or loitering around Shujin.

The arcade was full of random teens and pre-teens, all deeply invested in games that Sumire had never taken up but Akechi was apparently knowledgeable in (“Good practice,” he had replied when she asked, and she opted not to pry any further).

The two had hopped back on the train to Aoyama-Itchome, forced to stand as life resumes back to normalcy post-holidays. Despite the tight fit of the car, Akechi had placed a good amount of space between them—whether it’s for his sake or hers, she can appreciate the gesture.

The morning was a strange one. Ever since their darts game and impromptu heart-to-heart, the atmosphere between them had shifted. It’s still a few miles off from being friendly, but it’s easier now; there’s an unspoken understanding between them, a common goal that drives them forward.

Still, it would’ve been nice if they had gotten their act together prior to meeting with their last Phantom Thief.

“By the way,” Akechi says, and Sumire’s eyes flicker up at him in interest. They had been silent since they stepped on the train. “In the acknowledgement of…team spirit,” his lips curled, unable to keep the mocking out of his words at such a ridiculous concept. “I should let you know that I’ve spoken to Sakamoto.”

“Oh.” She can’t seem to muster up any shock. “When? Did you plan it?”

“A few days ago, and no, it was by chance,” his eyes narrowed. “Did you speak to Sakamoto?”

“Not on purpose!” Sumire defends, shifting her sweaty grip on the plastic handle. “He just happened to be there.”

“He seems to have a knack for that,” Akechi says, and Sumire doesn’t comment on the strange quality of his voice—bitterness? “Well? Anything worth repeating?”

“Uh…” she racks her brain. Somehow, she doesn’t think that Ryuji’s blow by blow of the new shounen manga was what Akechi’s looking for. “Nothing in particular. Oh! He spoke quite a bit about Kurusu-senpai, but that’s not too surprising, considering his wish and all.” ‘Quite a bit’ might be a bit of an understatement.

He squints at her. “Whose wish?”

“Kurusu-senpai’s? Obviously Sakamoto-senpai would still be affected since he’s directly tied Kurusu-senpai’s wish.”

His stare doesn’t relent. “Why on earth would Kurusu’s wish still be affecting Sakamoto? He already broke free of the fake reality, meaning that Sakamoto isn’t affected by Kurusu’s wish,” says Akechi. “The idiot has his own wish. Did you not know?”

Sumire would describe herself as a person with a decent amount of pride, but an obvious fact like that has heat rushing to her cheeks. She ignores him and instead asks, “Did you figure out his real wish?”

“On a technicality, no. Though I have a rather strong hunch on what it is, based on my interaction with him,” he cringes a bit when the train rocks someone into him. “It’s likely that his wish may be the exact as Kurusu’s.”

“As in…” she blinks. “He wished to be with senpai?”

“It’s possible. Disgusting, how desperate they are to bring something to fruition that could easily be done without the Metaverse.” And he adds, “Your conclusion wasn’t too far off.”

“Wow,” as articulate as it was, it was really all she could say about his observation. It sounds like an impossibility; having two people wish for each other, like some cheesy rom-com but with way more monsters and magic. Yet it makes sense—the way Ryuji spoke of Akira like he put up the moon, with a feeling of undeniable admiration and respect sandwiched between friendly jabs at him. It sounds like an impossibility, she realizes, because it probably is one. It would take something as insane as the Metaverse to create something as equally improbable as their level of requited love.

The speaker overhead announces their station and they both exit with no small amount of polite shoving.

It’s a short walk from Aoyama to the school, a route familiar enough to Sumire that she can probably traverse it with her eyes closed.

“Do you know where in Shujin he might be?” Akechi asks, and belatedly she realizes she hasn’t given him any indication for where to go. Not that it was a problem—for someone who doesn’t go here, he seems to know the path just as well as she does. “Is the school even open?”

“It should be fine,” Sumire says. “The grounds, maybe? Actually, the track is probably our best shot, since he goes for a run pretty often.”

A beat passes.

“How often?” he asks slowly.

“Um—” she spots a familiar patch of bleached hair. “Look, there he is! It looks like he’s talking to…is that the track team?”

Akechi hums. “Is it, now?”

“Pipe down, dumbass!” Even half a block down, Ryuji’s voice rings loud and clear. “I’m only tryin’ my best so you guys don’t laugh me—oh, no effin’ way. Yoshizawa! Akechi! Sorry, gimme a sec,” he calls back to the others as he half-jogs towards them.

“I knew it,” Akechi mutters.

“Huh?” she asks.

“His leg. He isn’t limping.”

Sumire’s brow creases. She’s about to ask Akechi to clarify when it dawns on her:

Kamoshida had explained to her (in full, descriptive, unhesitating detail) about the delinquent students that roamed the walls of Shujin, there was one in particular he had a special hatred for—Sakamoto Ryuji. Rumors had done little to reveal the truth of his declaration, but a single conversation with Ryuji had cleared away any possibility that he was the type for unnecessary violence.

However, there is one truth that came from every lie that was spread about him; his leg has been damaged to the point where professional running is no longer a possibility.

Ryuji approaches them, smiling and limp-free.

Which means—

“What’s up?” he asks. Just like when Sumire saw him before, Ryuji is donned in the standard school P.E track pants (red and white and cuffed at the bottom). It didn’t mean much to her then. “Whatcha doin’ here, Akechi? You transferring schools, or something?”

In all of ten seconds, Ryuji had proved them wrong without even knowing it.

“I was here to pick up a few books from the library when I bumped into him,” she lies for the both of them. “And you, senpai?”

Ryuji takes a step back, shocked. “Damn! You’re makin’ the rest of us look bad. Nah, the track guys just forced me to hangout with them to celebrate.”

“Celebrate?”

“Yeah, uh,” sneakers scuffing the concrete, Ryuji turns a light shade of pink when he admits, “The school might’ve let slip that there’s some colleges that might be scouting after me after my last meet.”

Even Akechi looked a little impressed. “That’s no small feat.”

“That’s incredible, senpai!” Sumire cries, unable to hold herself back. “That’s—that’s huge! Bigger than huge, it’s being scouted! Do you know how cool that is? Of course you do, you’re the one who got scouted!”

She throws both her hands up to the sky and Ryuji slaps them, the pleasant echo resounds through the alley and leaves them both shaking out their palms.

“Thanks,” Ryuji grins. “But don’t get too excited. It ain’t confirmed or anything,” he tries to keep the elation out of his voice and fails miserably. “I’m just so dang happy cause that means things’ll be easier for my mom down the line, y’know?”

It’s like a slap to the face, a jolt that sends her crash landing back to reality. Because she isn’t here to congratulate Ryuji for his success—she’s here to take that away from him. Not for the first time, she wonders if they should be doing this.

Then she recalls the painful but relieving feeling of getting her own memories back. Yoshizawa Sumire back. She recalls the boy beside her who’d do quite literally anything to get rid of this reality. She recalls a busy street, blood pooling on the concrete.

Sumire focuses. If not for herself, or for Akechi, then she’d focus for Kasumi.

“I’m happy for you,” she says, meaning every word. “How did Kurusu-senpai react?”

“Oh, that guy? I haven’t told him yet, so let’s keep it between us, y’know what I’m sayin’?” Ryuji goes for a wink, though it’s definitely closer to a blink.

Akechi coughs. “Is there a reason you haven’t told him yet? You both are quite…close, after all.”

“He’s been tough to contact the past week,” Ryuji shrugs, and neither of them mention that working with a Palace ruler probably consumes a good chunk of one’s leisure time. “I really wanna surprise him, though! Considering that he supported me more than anyone when it comes to track.”

“That’s kind of him,” says Akechi.

“Well, yeah. Both of us had to deal with Kamoshida toge…ther…” he seemed to listen to what he was saying, and stops abruptly. Any excitement that was on his face is wiped clean. Finally.

“How did you deal with Kamoshida together?” Akechi asks slowly. They had to be careful—this is their last shot.

“It, uh,” he purses his lips. “It was an accident at first, I think. Didn’t mean to.” Eyes sliding shut, he mutters, mostly to himself. “It was raining, I remember that. So why can’t I…?”

The two of them lean forward unconsciously as they gauge Ryuji’s reaction.

“You’ve got this, Sakamoto-senpai,” Sumire prompts gently.

It isn’t too different from watching someone do a math problem and seeing them do one, tiny thing wrong; seeing that tiny mistake being overlooked, even though it’s so obvious to the observer. He is so close, one breath away from—

“Sakamoto!”

Ryuji jerks, eyes flinging open and her heart sinks, irritation blossoming towards this random athlete who unknowingly jeopardized their known reality.

“Uh, yeah!” he calls back, shaking his head as if ridding himself of a bad dream. “Be there in a sec!”

“If that pesky runner is in Mementos, I swear he’ll be dead by tomorrow,” Akechi mummers darkly, because he always takes things too far.

“Sorry, gotta bail,” Ryuji apologizes. He still looks slightly unsettled, a little unnerved. “It was good to see you. We should grab some food sometime!”

“Wait!” Sumire blurts out before he can leave. She scrambles for something to say, finding the thought of their failure unbearable. “If—if you change your mind (or start to remember), we’ll both be in Odaiba tomorrow! At the stadium, to be exact,” she tries for a reassuring smile. “You were there in the summer, remember?”

“If I change my mind…?” he repeats, blinking. “Nah, you guys are wild. I don’t know what you’re talking about, but thanks for the invite. Later!”

He throws double peace signs up before joining his track mates once more, laughing and shoving each other in a way only teenage boys can pull off.

“An outstanding zero to seven loss,” Akechi dictates with a dead voice. “What a team we make. I’m floored.”

“I can’t believe I didn’t notice!” Sumire exclaims, slapping her hand to her forehead. “I literally saw him running, and I didn’t put the pieces together.”

He shakes his head. “How are you focusing on his wish?” Akechi asks, leaning against the stone pillar near him. “It doesn’t matter what his wish is. The point is, we lost. We wasted this week, and we don’t have a choice other than to confront Kurusu alone.”

“You forgot about the whole point of our plan, Akechi. Just because his friends didn’t realize the truth right away, doesn’t mean they won’t.”

“They probably won’t.”

“We’ll just have to see, then. If Kurusu-senpai has one talent, it’s his natural…thing, with people. You get what I mean, right?”

“No.”

“Liar. And hey!” Sumire gives him a pointed look. “You aren’t doing this alone! We’re working together—like two peas in a pod.”

“Yes, I haven’t forgotten our oath of team spirit. But still, that doesn’t change the fact that with the combined powers of Maruki and Kurusu, we’re as good as dead,” he says, and pauses. “Unless Maruki isn’t there.”

Sumire frowns, “Even if we could, I don’t think we should kidnap a doctor.”

“I meant that he might willingly not be there. He’s quite democratic and trusting—I can see that he might leave this in Kurusu’s hands. Don’t be fooled, though. If Kurusu wanted us gone, we probably would be.”

“I can’t imagine that he would ever do something like that.” The idea of Akira using his powers in that way… she doesn’t even want to indulge in the thought.

“He won’t,” Akechi agrees. “He never shoots to kill when it comes to real people,” he sighs. “A weakness on his part.”

“But you’re still saying that we should fight senpai. Fight Kurusu Akira.”

“I’m saying we should beat some sense into him. Convince him like we tried to convince all of his little gremlins, except we succeed this time around,” his face pinches together, as if he had something sour. “It’s not as if we have a choice.”

She hesitates, despite knowing that Akechi’s right. He scoffs at her. “Worried about scratching up the pretty boy? Trust me—we couldn’t finish him off even if we tried.”

It’s a little worrying to see how sure he is that Akira is apparently very difficult to murder. “Fine,” Sumire relents. “But I’m still going to hope for the best with his friends.”

“Then I’ll prepare for the worst, as per usual.”

A water droplet hits Sumire’s cheek, startling her. She looks up to be greeted by dark clouds.

“It’s raining.”

“I suppose we should rest for today, considering what we’re up against.”

“Hold on,” Sumire says, feeling bold. “The Metaverse—I’m still a little unsure about all that but bear with me—is about the strength of the heart and cognition, right?”

“Yes?” he nods at her in a go on manner.

“So, hypothetically, if we got some…cognition strengthening breakfast food together—”

“No.”

“I think it would be beneficial to us!” she says. It really did seem like a good idea when she first thought it up, but she really should’ve expected the resistance that comes with it; Akechi seems to hate the notion of fun. “The way you looked at my plate from back then is still stuck in by brain on loop—”

“That look is called disgust—”

“It would be really fun! Or um, not fun, but advantageous to the strength of our—our Personas?”

She’s grasping at straws, but optimism is one of her better traits. Still, Akechi’s withering glare is proving to be a tough foe. Sumire’s not going to back down, though. Whether she wanted it to happen or not, she finds herself liking his company more and more despite his thorns (many, many thorns).

Sumire couldn’t help but break out into a grin when Akechi speaks, voice void of any emotion:

“I’m picking this time. IHOP is an abomination.”

—

She didn’t think that hole-in-the-wall breakfast cafes existed, and if she did, she most definitely never would’ve guessed that Akechi would be leading her to one.

Laughing out loud at the situation would grant her a death wish through Loki, but it’s impossible not to. The light pastel shades of the cafe are comically paradoxical to Akechi’s eternal conniving expression and tone, yet the employees seem to light up when he enters and even greet him by name.

He orders without even looking at the menu and she decides to get two of whatever he’s getting; partly because she has no idea what to get, mostly out of curiosity.

They seat themselves in one of the frilly booths and once the food arrives, she has to physically stop herself from drooling.The three tall stacks of pancakes were steaming, thick, fluffy, and perfectly golden brown. The neapolitan ice cream was placed precariously on top, slowly melting and all completely drizzled in chocolate and strawberry syrup. Akechi almost looks like he wants to tell her that it physically isn’t possible to fit both stacks inside of her, but she’s already halfway through her first stack by the time he eats a forkful.

Unable to hold back, Sumire brings up his comment from back when they all went to the Kichijoji cafe with Akira.

“Oh, that?” Akechi reaches over to grab the syrup bottle. “I said I didn’t like sweet bread. Sweets are, in and of itself,” he pours an alarming amount of strawberry syrup on his plate. “Not bad.”

The conversation is light—none of the darker topics that were present during their darts game. Sumire hesitatingly asks him what it’s like to work with the police as a detective. She wasn’t expecting a detailed point-by-point explanation about the cops being the most ‘incompetent people who have ever wielded any amount of power, and yes I’m counting Mona in his normal cat form.’

In turn, Akechi seems genuinely interested in Sumire’s athletic career, wondering if her skills help her fight in the Metaverse.

Eventually, they even start talking about more mundane topics; clubs that they might have been participating in (“Gymnastics, obviously” and “Detective work if that counts, but not so much anymore”), what Akechi’s high school is like (“Boring, but I get excused often enough that it makes it bearable”), if they’re on social media much (“Yes! But my smartphone can barely open up any apps” and “I have a phone number and an email—that should be enough”).

Despite Akechi’s ever-present clipped comments, Sumire has to admit that this was all a nice change of pace. She’s having fun, sitting here, eating pancakes and talking. And if his replies were getting less snippy and more talky, maybe he’s feeling the same way.

Even if it’s only for an afternoon, even if they have to fight their counselor who now apparently controls reality, even if they have to fight Kurusu Akira—

It’s nice to just act like two teenagers with a sweet tooth for a day.

—

It’s just as cold as it was a week ago.

They’ve already been transformed into their Metaverse customers, and it’s blessedly warmer near the elevator than it is on the outskirts. None of that matters though; not with them standing in front of Maruki’s Palace once again.

“It has a certain beauty,” Sumire comments. “The Palace.”

“It’s a safety hazard, is what it is. Realistically, these would all crumble like tissue paper without Maruki holding it all up.”

“Still,” the abnormal swirls and teetering light fixtures possess a charm that she finds lovely in it’s own way. “I can admire it for what it is.”

Akechi nods at the elevator, “Let’s get this over with.”

“Wait.”

He stops. “What?”

“Kurusu-senpai gave sort of a battle plan before we went in,” Sumire reminded him. “Do you have one?”

“Hit him harder than he hits you,” Akechi pulls out his serrated steel, reflecting the light of the entrance hall. “Other than that, don’t die, and don’t fall behind.”

All things considered, it isn’t the worst pep talk she’s ever heard.

They start off to the depths of the Palace. The journey to see Akira is different without him present, but it’s as if the shadows are purposefully less aggressive with them—whether it’s because Maruki wants them to get there safely or what, but it lets them traverse through the lab with a fair amount of ease.

An announcement rings through the grand halls. “VIP patients identified. We will now begin the grand tour—please head to the auditorium through the door on your left.”

Definitely Maruki, then.

“How kind of them to politely inform us of their location,” Akechi remarks, and they head further inward.

They pass by what looks like research centres—powerpoints plastered by pie charts and numbers, shadows giving lectures on cognition (which is a strange sight to see), brain scan posters and lab coats strewn about. Sumire imagines that this might be what a university would look like in amidst of organized chaos.

Turning the corner, a double-door awaits them.

“Alright,” Sumire steels herself, hand finding her rapier’s hilt. “I hope senpai’s ready for us.”

“Trust me,” he reaches out to grab the handle. “He will be.”

A hallway meets them when they pass through. A long, white staircase elegantly leads them down and into what looks like a small version of a football stadium—seats filled up with faceless shadows and unlit theatre lights are hung from the beams above. Maybe it’s because this area has an uncanny resemblance to her competition venues, but she feels a tingle run down her spine: the feeling of anticipation.

They walk to the centre of it with caution, footsteps slow yet it resounding out all the same. She glances forward, squinting slightly against the darkness; a set of stairs that lead atop a stage are laid out in front of them, carpeted and plush. Ready for a performance.

Suddenly, all the lights flash on, white fluorescence blaring down on them mercilessly. Sumire and Akechi cringe against the unrelenting assault on their corneas.

“Welcome back.”

On top of the steps stood Akira, cloaked in his black Phantom Thief garb and drenched in blinding lights.

“I’m glad you two seem to be doing good. Honestly, I was a little nervous at first,” he descends the staircase, unhurried, hands stuffed in his pockets. “Looks like I was worried for nothing.”

“Worried? About us?” Akechi levels him with an incredulous look. “We aren’t the ones who are actively advocating the side of brainwashing.”

“I’m advocating the side of my friends being happy again,” he corrects firmly, turning to make eye contact with Sumire. “I want you to look me in the eyes and tell me that they weren’t happy, that they weren’t over the moon with euphoria. If you can tell me that, then I’ll join you in the fight against Maruki.”

Gazing into Akira’s eyes, Sumire opens her mouth, before looking away.

“That’s what I expected,” he shrugs, “It’s nice seeing them happy, right? But I’m not stupid—that won’t stop you two. You’re nearly as stubborn as I am.”

“Senpai,” she pleads. “I don’t want to fight you.”

“Neither do I. But you need to get Maruki to revert reality back to what it was,” Akira adjusts his gloves, and they both tense. “And to get to him, you have to get through me.”

“He’s really not backing down, isn’t he?” she mutters, her heart rate picking up rapidly.

Akechi snarls. “The tide sooner stop washing up before he quits being a fucking idiot.”

“You guys ready?” Akira calls. His tone is light, but there’s an undeniable glint to his eyes, similar to how the edge of a knife reflects light, and spreads his arms out. “Give it all you’ve got.”

Sumire meets Akechi’s eyes, and they nod.

They had a strategy, as loose as it was; there’s strength in numbers, and for once they have the advantage—pin him down, corner him, whatever they can manage, and incapacitate him until he listens to what they have to say. While this plan would certainly be more effective with more people, two should be enough to get the job done.

The air whistles around them as they dart forward, masks burning blue.

“Give him hell, Loki!”

The monochrome trickster bursts from the cinders with its eyes dead set on Akira. He raises a heavy hand and brings down his blade, slamming into the flooring as if it was warm butter, but Akira was already gone—he had hopped away just in time, giving them a cocky little smile.

Akechi snarled and swung again, only for Akira to bend backwards as if he’s in the most crucial game of limbo in recorded history, Laevatein missing him by an inch.

Before he can straighten himself again, Sumire shouts, “Dance, Cendrillon!”

As if the bells of midnight were calling her, a woman of glass and elegance manifests, white cloak blowing back from an unknown wind. A burst of light shoots from her crystal form but Akira had expected it, turning his bend into a backwards roll, not even trying to hide his grin. She’s starting to think that he was lying to her when he said he had no history with gymnastics. Maybe once this is all done, she could introduce him to her coach.

This back and forth continues, black and white and red all clashing together without anyone finding a target at all—that is, if Akira even had a target to begin with.

It’s as maddening as it is impressive to see him dodge and parry every attack; a hop here, a tilt there. It’s almost as if he knows what they were going to do before they even did it. It’s glaringly obvious why, yet it was another simple fact they overlooked—he was their leader, the person who made sure they had two, three, four possible strategies in their back pocket going into every fight. If not to ensure victory, then he does it to make sure that each and every one of them were capable enough to keep themselves safe.

But that just makes it all the more impossible to gain the upper hand.

By the time Akira had traversed nearly half the stadium in his evasion, not a hair out of place and unperturbed, Akechi and Sumire were breathing hard.

“He has,” Sumire gasps between breaths. “No intention of hitting us.”

“Dammit,” he hisses. “He’s turning this into a stamina battle.”

“Did you guys think I’d attack?” Akira frowns. Squinting at Sumire, he rummages through his pockets and tosses something to her. She catches it on instinct and peers down at the bottle of Arginade in her hand.

“It isn’t much, but I don’t want you hurting yourselves over this. I’d, uh, give one to Akechi too, but I think he’d throw it at my head or something.”

“Thank you,” Sumire sets the bottle down gingerly. “But I don’t think I should.”

“Suit yourself.”

“He’s wasting our time,” says Akechi. He points his steel at the corridor behind Akira. “Let’s just move past and find Maruki ourselves.”

She nods and they take a step forward before—

“Come, Black Frost.”

A flash of blue and a split second is all it took for the hallway’s entrance to be completely concealed in thick ice. “If you do that though, we’re gonna have a problem.”

“That wall won’t be enough to stop Cendrillon, senpai.”

“Probably not,” Akira agrees, gloved hand touching an invisible mask. “But a week was a lot of time to mix up some Personas.”

The implication makes Sumire swallow—Akechi wasn’t exaggerating.

“We have to stop him here,” she says quietly. “Even if we got lucky and ran, there’s no way we can reach Dr. Maruki with senpai trying to catch us.

Akechi clicks his tongue. “Unfortunately. We can’t win against him in a battle of stamina, but if we move fast and hit hard enough, we can catch him off guard.” His eyes flicker at Akira watching them speak, posture relaxed. “I’ve never had to reserve energy in a fight much, so this is the best plan with what we have.”

“Got it.”

“Don’t hold back,” Akechi huffs the same time Sumire says, “Don’t kill him.”

And then they sprint forward, rapidly closing in the distance to Akira.

Akechi meets her look before they split off wordlessly, approaching their target from either side.

“Hit him hard, Loki!”

“Aid me, Cendrillon!”

Curse and bless, dark and light come at Akira like a hand of judgement, narrowly escaping by flipping backwards with one hand and throwing out the other. “Let’s go, Yoshitsune.”

And like a scene from a classic Japanese period tale, a swordsman emerges from the embers, dual-wielding Katanas in either hand. WIth an air of divinity, he slices sideways, forcing the two to jerk away.

Perhaps it’s the effect of the Metaverse, its link to cognition, but the use of words became futile beyond the calling of their Personas—she can judge what Akechi had in mind without language just as he can support her in her strikes, where to stand so they don’t get caught in each other’s crossfire.

Sumire pulls out her rapier and swipes at Akira’s torso but it’s too slow; he shifts out of the way and again to dodge Akechi’s bullets like a true Phantom Thief—as elusive and hard to catch as mist.

“You’re pulling your punches, Yoshizawa!” Akechi shouts.

“I’m not trying to kill him!” Cendrillon moves her own weapon impossibly quick, glowing lines appearing midair like a child drawing on paper, and it all bursts in unison—slicing through everything indiscriminately, yet Akira remains untouched.

“Give me some credit,” he calls, coattail swishing stylishly. “I don’t think I’m doing too bad.” Yoshitsune dashes forward, armor glinting and steel sparking as lightning shoots from his katanas, several inches to Sumire’s right. It leaves her hair filled to the brim with static.

Exhausting as their back and forth was, Akira hadn’t once attacked them directly. Even when they roll or sidestep, every movement is accounted for and he adjusts his blows in turn—close enough for them to stagger back from him, but never enough for them to be touched. The message was clear: I’d never hurt you, but there’s no chance in hell I’m letting you win, either.

Still, Sumire wipes her glistening temple as Loki brings down his blade where Akira was and into the ground, the collision forceful enough to make the stage lights above rattle. It’s beginning to be clear that it would be near impossible to maintain Akira’s pin-point accuracy, given his lack of compromise on it. His rolls are getting lethargic, backflips half-assed; whether he knew it or not, he’s beginning to slow down.

And Akechi is starting to get desperate.

Precise swings from before are losing control, wild ones taking place instead.

Akira reaches up once more. “Lend me a hand, Metatron.”

What looks like an archangel crafted during the industrial revolution bursts forth where Yoshitsune once stood, eyes filled with divinity and judgement as he launches a small army of rainbow, psychokinetic spheres around Akechi’s vicinity, but fatigue causes a slight miscalculation—one of the pink orbs barely grazes his brown hair, causing him to flinch back from shock.

It didn’t hurt, it couldn’t have hurt, but it’s the first hit the Akira had landed all day, accidental or otherwise.

A beat passes as they both freeze, and Sumire slows when she sees the expression on Akira’s face, unobstructed by his mask; all the bravado, the cockiness and boldness is gone like it was never there. In its place, a gaunt, horrified look.

“I…” he breathes, unnaturally pale. “Shit, I’m sorry. Here, just…” he starts rummaging through his pockets, hands shaking. “I know I have a bead in here somewhere, just let me—” Akira’s voice cracks. “Dammit, of course I can’t find it when I actually—why can’t I—”

Akechi takes an uneasy step backwards, overexertion threatening to take over. As if it weighs a hundred pounds, he raises an arm, red eyes disturbingly bright and dead-set on Akira.

Sumire feels her breath catch in her throat; she’s in a clear position to see it happen. Akira is still frantically looking through his stuff, an overwhelming guilt seeming to cloud his senses. Akechi, in his state of mind and body, is refusing to see the facts in favor of following his instincts—because even now, he still truly believes that Akira will remain untouched, no matter what.

Because, to Akechi, he is Kurusu Akira.

“Come, Loki!”

“Goro, wait!” Sumire cries.

Time slows down as Loki raises his blade, serrated steel exuding a curse potent enough to bring down any archangel to its knees several times over. And Akira looks up, eyes wide and dilated, but it’s too late to do anything other than take a deep breath and tense himself for the devastating blow—

Footsteps resound behind them, light and fast, and before Sumire can even turn around, a familiar voice yells out:

“I don’t fucking think so.”

Sakamoto Ryuji sprints past her and as Loki brings down his sword, stands directly in front of Akira, arms wide and acting like a barricade between him and the rest of the world.

[it-will-not-last-the-night]

Maruki Therapy with Ryuji really could have been done better

With the English version out I have begun to watch LPs of it so I can get the official translations. Two little things I wanted to mention with connection to Ryuji are that I’ve now seen the Maruki Therapy scene with him and his scene with Makoto prepping their showtime.

So the Maruki therapy scene: The scene is inoffensive and fine but...it really underscores to me how much I hate Ryuji’s regression in the third trimester. Within the therapy scene Ryuji never lets down his guard with Maruki and is barely ever even engaged in anyway with him. Beyond a brief stint of finding Maruki amusing at the close of the session Ryuji remains guarded throughout and clearly doesn't connect with Maruki at all.

What’s worse is this ‘track dream’ is something Maruki literally has to lead Ryuji too, by the nose, because it clearly ISN’T what’s most important to Ryuji. To give a brief summation:

Ryuji enters the room, clearly reluctantly and annoyed at the prospect. 

Maruki tries to tell him that he’s on his side and won’t chew him out like other teachers. Ryuji clearly doesn’t believe him and asks if he’s here to be interrogated about Kamoshida. 

Maruki tries to console him again and says they don’t need to talk about anything he doesn’t want too. 

Ryuji, obviously, has nothing to talk about then and literally comments on how awkward this is.

Maruki then asks if they can talk about someone he likes. 

Ryuji is clearly weirded out by this and tells Maruki there is no-one in his class he likes and even if there was he wouldn’t talk about it with him. 

Maruki then tries to spin a ‘you’re a teenager, aren’t you always thinking about love,’ yarn and Ryuji turns it back on him and just asks if he was like that in High School, shutting him up. 

Then Maruki changes tact again, asks Ryuji what he does in his time off. 

Ryuji comments that he spends time with his friends, though only lately, and that before that he was just angry and that before that he did track. 

Importantly, in this, he attaches no special significance to track and his actual answer as to what he does to enjoy himself is ‘hanging out with my buds’. 

Maruki latches on to the track and asks Ryuji to talk about it. 

Ryuji basically explains he enjoyed the validation of performing well and that he wanted it to be a vehicle to support his mother (I’ve touched in my previous post on this how this ties into the wish missing Ryuji’s character arc). 

Maruki then brings up Ryuji’s broken leg, something Ryuji didn’t know he knew and which clearly upsets him. 

After this Maruki just talks about wishing for something and making it come true, Ryuji disbelieves him, he pulls a joke about a drink, and Ryuji laughs at him and calls him weird.

This scene, somehow, is meant to reflect a deep and earnest wish of Ryuji’s, despite coming long before the completion of his character arc in the Velvet Room and, also, never once showing Ryuji actually opening up to Maruki.

For these scenes to have been effective they really needed to make Maruki have a more emphatic bond with the PTs, this looks incredibly shallow. 

Maruki basically leads Ryuji by the nose to a conclusion he wants, Ryuji barely expresses any enthusiasm for it, and this is used as the cornerstone of his wish even though it doesn’t acknowledge any of his character growth, coming several months before he completes that. I just do not like it, personally.

[lilyhoshikawa]

Futaba headcanons master post time >:3c

Much credit to @a-missing-ache for talking to me a bunch about this girl so I could put this together~! Many of the ideas here were either ideas she had that I adopted, or things that came up in conversation with her.

- Autistic trans girl with depression, PTSD, and psychosis. Experiences paranoid delusions and visual and auditory hallucinations prior to her arc in the game. Prone to suicide idealization and intrusive thoughts. Susceptible to self-harm if her self-hatred goes unchecked.

- Some of her main special interests are computers, video games, and anime. She gets extremely hyperfixated on games that she really likes and will play them basically nonstop. She’ll play Animal Crossing for a full day if someone isn’t there to cut in and stop her.

- The coat she wears in winter is her favorite, it’s a very good texture stim and she likes to rub her face against the fluffy bit at the top. She also likes to stim with arm flaps or kicking her leggies, but she gets nervous about doing this in public.

- She wears her headphones pretty much all the time as a sensory tool. Often times she won’t have anything playing, but the headphones have a noise-cancelling mode that she leaves it on most of the time to avoid sensory overload and feel safer. She basically only takes them off if they need to charge or she knows it’s safe to. She panics when they run out of battery, but she has an additional pair of wired headphones to use when her main pair is charging. She has basically the longest battery life she could get on her wireless headphones, but since she frequently passes out at random times without turning them off or plugging them in they still die fairly frequently on her. She can’t go to sleep without some headphones on playing white noise or a podcast or quiet music from a video game.

- She goes nonverbal fairly frequently, and typically makes use of texting to communicate with others instead. If she’s alone, she’ll often call one of the other thieves (Ren most often) to have them talk to her and ground her, and sometimes speak for her if need be. After her initial arc, Sojiro learns about her texting thing and gets help from Ren with learning how to use a phone to text and starts using it to text her when she needs to.

- Sojiro’s curry is her staple food, and she eats it pretty much at least once a day for the most part.

- She’s a big coffee drinker, and she takes it black. Sojiro previously would make her a cup in the morning and bring some back from his work when he came home at night, with her leaving the room to make her own cup during the afternoon. She finds drinking it relaxing.

- Prior to meeting the Phantom Thieves, she experienced fairly regular hallucinations and delusions, often being convinced that her mother was in her room or was out to get her somehow. She would hear her mother talking to her or see her appear in her room and usually leave in a panic if she could manage to get up. Sojiro did his best to help her but really didn’t have the tools to understand what she was going through. After her Palace, she gains the confidence to be open with him about her experiences and is eventually put on medication to help with them. It doesn’t make it stop entirely, but becomes far less frequent and allows her to live a more normal life.

- She’ll sometimes have panic attacks which usually result in her laying in bed for awhile experiencing suicidal thoughts until they go away, but as time goes on she learns to manage these attacks a lot better, and avoid hurting herself or letting her intrusive thoughts run wild.

- Part of her shyness and social anxiety comes from a mix of autism, dysphoria, and a general lack of experience being out in the world. She’s easily startled and frightened and usually still needs someone to go with her any time she leaves the house. She likes to make herself small, which is why she frequently sits the way she does, and a lot of times she’ll just sit down on the floor, because she likes it there. She’ll frequently ask others to stop if she’s in too noisy of an area and begins to experience sensory overload, sit down on the floor in a quieter place somewhere and recharge.

- After the Hawaii trip, Ren decides to do video calls with Futaba sometimes so he can show her where he is or what he’s doing when she’s not feeling able to go outside that day. If she doesn’t want to show her face, she holds up a plushie or Morgana in front of her end of the screen instead.

- Part of her social anxiety is with presenting well in public, having fits of big dysphoria, and she’s pretty self-conscious about her voice, so she likes to do the texting thing a lot when she gets nervous and also just speak quietly sometimes, especially if it’s with Ren.

- She retains an issue with eating normally and still has a hard time convincing herself to eat sometimes, and will skip meals on occasion. She has a habit of texting one of the Thieves and asking them for permission to get a snack or a meal, and they always immediately tell her it’s okay, and that confirmation is enough for her. Sojiro sometimes takes her and Ren out for ice cream as a family bonding experience and she loves it. It was meant to be a one-off celebration after she recovered but she loved it so much Sojiro decided he had to make it a regular thing.

- She’s prone to taking depression naps, though before she starts recovering it’s less “depression naps” and more “she stays in her room with lights down and her curtains drawn so she has no concept of time and just kinda passes out and wakes up at random intervals with no consideration for what time it is”. She gets better about it but she falls back into weird and irregular sleeping patterns fairly often and she always hates resetting her internal clock. It’s at least easier than going until she collapses for days on end, though.

- She’ll often take naps inside her Persona, Navi, if she randomly gets tired while the group is just exploring and confirms they don’t think they’ll need her for some time. She’ll also sometimes nap in the Mona car. They’re safe, cozy little spaces that make her feel protected and comfortable so they’re prime napping spots.

- Ren has insomnia and Futaba has a really messed up sleep schedule so sometimes when they’re both awake at like 4am they’ll just text each other and sometimes play a game with one another to pass the time.

- She’s still very prone to nightmares and will sometimes wake up in a panic, and if no one is around it sometimes results in a full meltdown and in the worst case scenario she ends up getting hurt, so she tries to keep people on standby.

- She is, in fact, very funny and snarky when she wants to be, and is actually good at communicating her infodumps with humor and casual speech that makes it understandable for the others.

- If she’d not immediately involved in a conversation that involves a large enough group of people, she’ll just zone out until she’s mentioned again or feels a time to interject. Sometimes she’ll start playing phone games.

- She plays trading card games. She sometimes joins competitive tournaments online when she can, but is too scared to go to them IRL. She promises herself she’ll try it some day.

- As a disaster pansexual, she is very prone to developing crushes on any random girl at a coffee shop who’s even the littlest bit nice to her. She’s still got crushes on Ann and Haru, both of whom know it (it’s fairly obvious), but they don’t let her know that.

- She likes to pose, or do silly energetic motions just for the fun of it. She takes joy in just doing a little dance while she’s talking to someone sometimes. She likes to go “nya” also, especially around Morgana.

- She has nicknamed the position she always goes into whenever she sits (usually to make herself feel cozy and safe and also to be as small as possible) the “Futababall”.

- Before meeting the Thieves, she actually didn’t play multiplayer games very much, as even that level of interaction with others intimidated her to some degree. Ren was the first person she ever played video games with, and she kicked his ass at Smash Bros.

- She experiences periods of severe dysphoria during which she struggles to look at herself and often feels hopelessness or despair. During these periods Ren and Sojiro have taken to putting up a blanket to cover the bathroom mirror so that she can still shower normally and wash her hands and go in and out of the bathroom.

- Before her Palace, she would often go days without eating, or only eat once, through a mix of forgetting to eat, losing track of time, and convincing herself she didn’t deserve it. She sometimes relapses on this but is usually good about bouncing back after a day or two.

- The Thieves star making Futaba’s room one of their main meeting places because she feels safe and comfortable there.

- She doesn’t like it when her room is brightly lit up but if it’s pitch-dark with no lights on she becomes extremely anxious and terrified, gets jittery and sometimes has panic attacks or experiences visual hallucinations. Her preferred method is to use the light of her computer to keep the room dim, but bright enough to see everything, or having curtains half-drawn.

- She sometimes forgot to take her meds when she first started on them and this bothered her so much that she eventually began setting five distinct timers for each dose, and sometimes they’ll just all go off in succession when she’s with the group and confuse them all.

- She collects plushies of her favorite anime characters, because it’s merch you can hug!! She loves cuddling her plushies, especially when she’s feeling a bit nervous. They’re a nice sensory feeling, they remind her of her friends, and they feel safe.

- Sometimes when she’s having a hard time sleeping, she’ll invite Ren to come to her room to hang out while she falls asleep to help her feel safe. He’ll often invite Ryuji over for a date or something and she’ll help them set up a video game to play with each other while they’re there. Ryuji initially had a problem of yelling when he lost in the game and waking her up but he got better about it after awhile.

- Every morning around 5-6am Ren wakes up usually due to insomnia or nightmares and he immediately goes to check on Futaba to see if she’s asleep yet, he often finds her in her room on her laptop unaware of what time it is and when she sees him she does a little yell and jumps into bed and he reassures her that it’s ok before leaving and going back to bed.

- She likes to make fun of Ren for having a criminal record sometimes, noting that the hacking she’s done with Medjid is by far more illegal than him beating up a rich abuser once.

- She like spending time with the lady Phantom Thieves because she really likes girls and they all think it’s cute how gay she is, and try to give her tips about it. If Ren isn’t available she opts for inviting one or more of the girls to hang out with her and it makes her feel very good to be around them. Ann sometimes gives her some of her old clothes and it feels super validating for her.

[vgckwb]

P5R: Rebel Girl (A FeMC Story/P5R Rework) Chapter 20: A Place to Belong

After school the next day, Ren received a message from Sumire.

Sumire: Hey senpai.

Sumire: Um, you don’t have to be with me all the time.

Sumire: It’s not that I don’t want you to!

Sumire: But I sometimes want to figure some things out on my own.

Ren: I understand.

Sumire: Thank you senpai.

Ren left class and was about to head out when Ryuji stopped her. “Hey, uh, could you help me?”

“Of course” she said. “What’s up?”

“Well, uh…” Ryuji said, slightly embarrassed. “Could...could you explain to my teacher how I’m good at math?”

Ren was confused and then tickled pink. “Of course. Let’s go.” The two went to the faculty office. They met up with the math teacher, Ms. Usami.

“Hey Ms. Usami” Ryuji said.

“So, is this the person that says you’re good at math?” she asked. Ryuji nodded. “I see.” She turned to Ren. “Young ma’am, I don’t know why you think that, but I can assure you you’re wrong.”

“No offence, but I know I’m correct,” Ren said. She did have to treat lightly. She was already having troubles with one teacher, and she felt like that one is the only one she could solve via Persona.

“Hm” Ms. Usami scoffed. “We have a saying in math: Prove it.”

Ren nodded. She turned to Ryuji.  “Ryuji, what is 7 x 9 + 3?”

“Uhhhhhhhhh” Ryuji said.

“See?” Ms. Usami said, feeling vindicated.

“Hold on,” Ren said. “Alright, forget that question. Now, I work out once a day for nine weeks, and then three days after these nine weeks. How many days did I work out?”

“Oh, that’s easy,” Ryuji said. “66.”

“What?” Ms. Usami said in shock. “How?”

“Ryuji needs to be able to understand the problems,” Ren explained. “Numbers alone are a bit much for him.”

“But how does he not understand numbers?” Ms. Usami asked.

“That I don’t know the answer to” Ren said. “It’s just who he is.”

Ms. Usami looked at the two of them sterly. “Very well. I shall take this into consideration.” Ren nodded and the two of them left.

“Thanks man… uh, woman…” Ryuji said.

Ren giggled. “It’s fine.”

“So, you wanna train today?” Ryuji asked. “Or are you watching over Sumire-chan again?”

“I’m fine to train,” Ren said. “Sumire messaged me earlier saying that I didn’t need to hover around her.”

“Hmmmm. Well, alright” Ryuji said. “Let’s go get changed and meet in the usual place.” Ren nodded and they headed out. Once they were dressed for the occasion, they made their way to Ryuji’s training spot, only to see that a few other people were there already. “WHAT?!” Ryuji yelled.

One of the students turned to Ryuji. “Oh, it’s you.”

“What are you doing here?” Ryuji asked.

“What does it look like?” the other student said. “We’re training here. In case you forgot, we can’t use the gym anymore.” Ryuji backed down, but was still upset.

“Um, what’s going on?” Ren asked.

“Who’s this?” the student asked. “Is she your girlfriend?”

“What?! No!” Ryuji answered. “She’s just a friend.”

“A friend huh?” the other guy said. “Well, would she still be friends with you if I told her you’re the reason we have to practice out here?”

“Wait, are you former members of the track team?” Ren asked. The others there were surprised.

“She knows. That’s not gonna work” Ryuji said.

“Huh” said the other student. “You managed to find someone who wants to hang out with you. Honestly, good for you.”

“What do you want?” Ryuji asked.

“You know what I want,” the other student said. “And we can’t have it because you punched Kamoshida in the face!”

“Look, I’m sorry,” Ryuji said.

“Why couldn’t you just grin and bear it like everyone else?! Why did you have to go flying off the handle?!” the student asked.

“Cause that’s bullshit!” Ryuji said.

“Maybe, but you didn’t have to drag us down into it!” the student said. “Look, if we ever want to bring the track team back, we have to stay in top form. Meanwhile, I’m not sure why you’re even bothering to train at all.”

“Well, uhhhh” Ryuji could not think of a good lie, but he had enough common sense not to blurt out that he was running with a band of thieves.

Ren jumped in. “I asked him to,” she said. Everyone was confused.

“Uh, yeah” Ryuji said. “She’s a transfer student.”

The former track team was confused. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“Well, uhhhh” Ryuji was stuck again.

“I was on the basketball team at my old school,” Ren said. “However, when I came here, they weren’t accepting new members. I wanted to keep my form up for when I return home, and Ryuji said he’d help me with that.”

The track members looked at them. “Very well. Still, can’t you find your own place to train and stop getting in our way?”

“He’s not-” Ren said, defending Ryuji.

“Fine,” Ryuji said. “Let’s go.” Ryuji turned around. Ren was surprised, but began to follow Ryuji.

“Hold on!” the track team member said. “Before you go, just be careful around him. He might seem nice enough, but one wrong move, and he’ll drag you down to his level.”

Ren smiled. “I think I can handle myself.” She ran and caught up with Ryuji. “So, why are we just giving up?”

Ryuji sighed. “I did kind of screw them over by punching Kamoshida. He dissolved the track team, and now they have nowhere else to go. I thought I should just let them have it. It’s the least I could do after ruining everything for them.”

“Well, that’s awfully nice of you,” Ren said. “Wanna talk about it?”

“Huh? Sure, I guess” Ryuji said. “Let’s go get changed first.” They got changed and met  up. “Wanna go to that ramen place again?”

“I don’t have a preference,” Ren said.

“Well then, let’s go!” Ryuji said. They headed back to the ramen place. “AH! That hits the spot.” Ryuji turned to Ren. “So, uh, before we talk about my stuff, were you really in basketball?”

Ren looked at him, surprised. “Huh? Oh, yeah. I was one of the best players.”

“Man, that has to suck” Ryuji said. “I bet that jerkoff that framed you didn’t care about that.”

“Oh, I was off the team before that,” Ren explained.

“Really?” Ryuji said.

Ren nodded. “They kicked me off.”

Ryuji looked at Ren puzzled. “Why?”

“Personal reasons” Ren explained. “They just didn’t like me after a certain point.”

Ryuji looked disconcerted. “How do you keep up your attitude when faced with so many injustices?”

“Well, I’ll admit it’s hard,” Ren said, “but I can’t not be myself.  Otherwise I’d be living a lie, and the person I’d hate the most would be myself.”

Ryuji smiled. “I getcha!” He grew sad. “But you know you it is hard being yourself when ‘yourself’ isolates everyone else around you.”

Ren looked at Ryuji. “Are you talking to me or you at this point?”

Ryuji clumsily grinned. “Man, you can see through me like a cellphone.”

Ren was confused. “Do you mean cellophane?”

“Yeah… th-that thing” Ryuji said. He sighed. “I thought I had a place to belong on track. But I still acted selfishly. As much as I’ve learned, I don’t know if I can forgive myself until the team does. As much as I hate my piece of shit father, I think I might have inherited his knack for acting on impulse.”

Ren looked at Ryuji, concerned. “Well, I doubt you’re exactly like your father. Here you are moping about throwing one punch at a guy who deserved it. Meanwhile, as I understand it, your father still hasn’t come back to apologize after repeatedly beating your mother, who, as I also understand it, is the salt of the Earth.”

Ryuji smiled. “I know it’s not the approach for everyone, but I do appreciate your bluntness. Hm. Still, I did kinda screw over everyone else because I didn’t want people to know about my home life. I wasn’t honest. And as a team, you need to be able to trust each other.”

Ren seemed hesitant. “Do you think I could trust you with anything?”

Ryuji looked at Ren puzzled. “Are you implying you have another secret?”

“Maybe” Ren said, mischievously.

“Well, I doubt it’s as big as ‘I got arrested’” Ryuji rationalized. “But whenever you’re ready, I’ll be there for you.”

Ren nodded. “Thanks.”

Ryuji smiled. He then frowned. “Say, were you uncomfortable when I was making a pass at you?” Ren raised her eyebrow. “Because I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable!” Ryuji added.

Ren giggled. “You’re fine.”

Ryuji sighed. “That’s a relief…”

Ren looked at Ryuji. “It seems like there’s a little more on your mind.”

“I was talking with Yoshizawa yesterday. I also asked her out” Ryuji explained. Ren was shaken. “She said she had someone she liked already.”

“Oh…” Ren said, slightly disappointed.

Ryuji continued. “She asked me why though, and I explained that everything in my life is so messed up that dating someone might bring something normal to my existence. And then I got to thinking: before joining track, and meeting my first coach, I had no positive, real, male role models in my life. I knew I didn’t want to be like my dad, but the only other guys I could aspire to be like were on TV.

But then when I first joined the track team, I met the coach. He worked us hard, but it was because he knew we could do it. And he didn’t work us as hard as Kamoshida did. He was also really kind too.”

Ryuji slammed his fist on the table. “But then Kamoshida came in and replaced him! I don’t know how a man should act because any man I’ve seen, aside from the original coach, was selfish, resentful, and all around just a bad person. I don’t know what to do.”

Ren saw Ryuji’s concern. “Well, who says you need a man to look up to?” Ryuji looked at her. “You seem to be doing alright now. You don’t want to be your father or Kamoshida. And you’re recognizing your own faults.”

Ryuji smiled. “Maybe you’re right.” He sighed. “I just have trouble sorting my thoughts. It’s a good thing you’re here though. You’re fairly easy to talk to, and it helps me filter it all.”

Ren smiled. “What are friends for?”

Ryuji smirked. “You know, you and my mom are both women, and yet you’re two of the strongest and kindest people I know. Maybe taking a page out of the other side’s playbook isn’t a bad idea.”

“That’s the spirit!” Ren said. “Take it and make it your own!”

“Yeah!” Ryuji said. “I’m going to find some way to make it up to the track team. Oh, but not right away. I’m going to wait for things to simmer down for a bit.”

“That’s fine. Go at your own pace” Ren said.

“My own pace, huh” Ryuji said. “I know I’ve never really been afraid to be myself before, but talking with you makes me feel more confident in my individuality.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” Ren said. “The same goes for me too.”

“No problem,” Ryuji said.

Chariot-Ryuji Sakamoto: Rank 3

They finished their ramen and then left.

The next day after school, Ren got a call. “Hello, it’s Takemi” said the voice on the other end. “I know you have other obligations as a student, but I would appreciate some help with the medicine.”

“Of course, Dr. Takemi” Ren said. “I’ll be right there.” She hung up.

“Do you want me there?” Morgana said.

“Nah, I think I’ll be fine,” Ren said. “Besides, it could take a while.”

“Very well,” Morgana said. “I’m going to go explore the area.” Ren nodded.

She arrived at Takemi medical clinic. “Ah, you’re here. Welcome.”

“Thank you,” Ren said.

“Now, before we begin, I need you to fill out this patient history chart as accurately as possible,” Takemi said, handing her a form. “When researching a drug’s effects, the slightest details can make a world of difference.” Ren began filling the form out. “By the way, I do mean accurate. I don’t think you’d be the type to, but if you were using illicit substances, I would need to know. I wouldn’t rat you out either.”

Ren smiled. “Thanks... I guess? But I don’t.”

“Good,” Takemi said. “I just want to make sure you’re as comfortable as possible with me.”

“I don’t think you need to worry,” Ren said.

“You’d be surprised,” Takemi said. Ren finished and handed her the form. “Hm. Nothing really stands out.” She smiled. “A test subject like you is invaluable to the world of medicine. Now, let’s get started.”

She grabbed a small plastic cup and handed it to Ren. “This is a prototype of the medicine I’m working on.” Ren looked at it. “Don’t worry. It’s developed enough where it only attacks the infected cells. It just needs some fine tuning here and there. It’s completely safe.”

Ren looked at the medicine. Well, if she says it’s safe. She swallowed the medicine. Ren’s vision started to blur. Soon, she found herself passing out.

A few hours later, she woke up. “Ah, you’re awake,” Takemi said. “How do you feel?”

Ren tried to get her bearings straight. “A little discombobulated, I guess. But also a little refreshed.”

“Hm, seems you might have needed a nap like that” Takemi said, writing what Ren said down. “I kid, of course.” A police officer walks in. Takemi sighed. “What now? I told you, you’re going to need a warrant before you can investigate me.”

“Hm” sneered the officer. “It just so happens we’ve received a report of wrongdoing. I’m going to need to see medical records, and transactions! Bet you couldn’t hide anything, could you?”

Takemi was disinterested with this officer's attitude. “Very well,” Takemi said. She pulled up the information. “Here you go.”

“Huh?” the officer said, looking it over.

“This kid is my only patient today,” Takemi said. “If you needed to see transactions, might it have been for improper billing?”

“I don’t understand,” The cop said.

“My guess is, you’ve been sent on a wild goose chase” Takemi responded.

The cop looked at Ren. “Why ARE you here? You seem fine enough. Are you doing something illegal?”

Ren felt a little nervous, but thought she could use that to her advantage. “Um, well, you see, I recently moved here. I’m worrying about all sorts of things. School. Friends. The future. Dr. Takemi here is doing a check up on me, and giving me medicine to help me relax.”

“She’s right. Teens have it so hard these days” Takemi explained.

“Hm Very well” the officer said. “It appears you’re clear for now, but I know you’re The Plague. You’re bound to mess up sooner or later.” The cop walks out.

Takemi sighed. “Why does this keep happening?”

“The Plague?” Ren asked.

Takemi looked at Ren. “That’s a story for another time. For now, I need to process these results.” Takemi went back to her notes. Ren started to leave. “By the way,” Takemi said, interrupting Ren leaving, “if you’re ever worried about anything, you can come to my office if I’m in.” Ren looked at her puzzled. “I don’t need to know why, but I did notice you tense up when the officer came in. If you’re ever worried about the police going after you, I’ll provide sanctuary for you.”

Ren smiled. “Thanks doc. And I hope my results will help you.”

“They most assuredly will. But thank you” Takemi said.

Death-Tae Takemi: Rank 2

Ren left, feeling more relaxed than she had felt in a while. She picked up Morgana and headed back to Leblanc.

[natsubeatsrock]

"Why do you hate Nalu fans asking for angst?"

Who actually believed I was done talking smack about Nalu?

I feel like I haven't been clear enough on this. Normally, I'd say something like this because fandom ignores my arguments about something. While that's not untrue here, looking back on my discussions of the Nalu fandom's desire for canon situations of angst, I feel like I can be a bit more clear and direct as to why I don't like it.

A lot of what I've said makes it seem as though I don't like or appreciate angst as a whole. Sure, I say I don't hate angst, but I worry that my explanations make it sound like a cover to rag on Nalu for even potentially having angst. I want to explain the issue I have with the cries for Nalu angst in a way that shows I can appreciate angst.

Let's start with a couple of ships outside of Fairy Tail. The first is one that my long-time fans may recognize. In an earlier rant from around the time that Fairy Tail was ending, I briefly touched on Beauty and the Beast and how Belle and the Beast transformation is something Nalu fans wanted out of Mashima's treatment of the END situation. However, I hinted at how their ship is an example of good angst and I want to talk about it more.

At the beginning of the movie, Belle and the Beast start not liking each other much. However, a change happens when she is told to leave after breaking the Beast's one rule. Before she can get too far from the palace, Belle is saved from a pack of wolves by the Beast. As she's cleaning his wounds, they start to come to more of an understanding of each other. As shown by lyrics of and scenes shown during the song "Something There", they start to come to an understanding of each other that leads to romantic feelings. 

By the time we get to "Beauty and the Beast", it's clear that they both have feelings for each other. Despite the Beast confirming he loves her, we don't get a confession from Belle until after he supposedly dies. However, it's important to remember that her confession comes off the heels of a defense of the Beast from villagers, the rest of their relational progression and the timer set by the falling rose petals. Her confession comes just as the last petal falls from the enchanted rose. In other words, she came to truly love him at the last possible moment and it may not have mattered if he died at that moment. Of course, he does live and they can be a couple.

The second example comes from one of my favorite anime, Toradora. (I'd use Clannad for a similar reason, but I know this one off-hand better.) It's a bit of an understatement to say that Taiga Aisaka and Ryuji Takasu start on the wrong foot. It's established fairly early on that much of their initial goals are to get the other's best friend to end up with them. However, as they spend time together, they end up growing closer to each other. As early as episode 2, Ryuji goes from annoyed at not having enough rice because of Taiga's presence to disappointed at having too much rice in her absence. But then, Ryuji gets into an accident and it becomes clear that Taiga has stronger feelings for him that she's letting on.

As the series progresses, we see evidence of them growing closer together and the idea of them becoming a couple is made to seem more realistic. It's not that we can't tell if they like each other at this point; it's that we're not sure how things will play out. It turns out that, during their class trip, Taiga takes a spill of her own and unknowingly confesses to Ryuji. He outright confirms that he has feelings of his own but struggles to tell her how he feels. A bunch of shenanigans happens between then and the end of the series, but they do end up together at the end of the series.

I explain the stories of the couples in this way for an important reason. In each of these stories, the angst does draw people closer together. However, there is a sense that the relationship was already progressing that way, to begin with. Angst was used as the medium to draw feelings out of characters they might have already been on track to have. Chances are that they could have gotten into their relationship without the angst. However, it works very well to see their relationship progress as part of the resolution to the tension of the story. Depending on how a writer spins it, it can work well.

Mashima did not do this with Nalu. Not he didn’t do it well with Nalu. It didn’t happen.

What I will say is that there wasn't a lack of moments that could have been used to draw out romantic feelings for each other. Here's a list of a few moments I can think of off the top of my head after the Galuna Island arc (at which point they're more familiar with each other):

Lucy being captured by Gajeel during the Phantom Lord arc.

Natsu on the brink of losing against Gajeel, also Phantom Lord.

Lucy getting captured during the Edolas arc.

Lucy saying "it's more fun when we're together" on Tenrou Island.

After the Naval Battle in the Grand Magic Games.

Lucy getting captured (again) during the Grand Magic Games.

The epilogue of the Tartarus arc. 

Natsu realizing the guild was dissolved at the beginning of the Avatar arc.

Natsu almost dying after Aquarius came back.

Natsu almost dying (again) after fighting Gray.

The end of the fight with Acnologia.

There are a couple of other moments I probably could have added, especially from the anime and the sequel, but these are some of the moments that Mashima could have used to bring Natsu and Lucy closer to a trajectory of a romantic relationship. It's even canonically hinted during a few of these moments that he could have done exactly that.

However, the resolution for each of these moments came and went. Natsu and Lucy were friends before they happened and they didn't seem to be anything more than friends after them. I don't feel as though there's any real reason to think that anything else could cause some well of romantic emotions that has yet to be untapped to spring.

This has been outright confirmed for me by Mashima's writing of the final arc of the main series. Natsu nearly dies in front of Lucy. Twice. And the most we get from the whole thing is a "thanks for helping me get in the guild" a year later? I know Evergreen mentions that she might like him, but that's shot down and ignored almost as soon as it was brought up.

Are we supposed to believe Nalu would have stopped a rampage from END? Or that, even if it did, Mashima would use the opportunity to make clear that Natsu and Lucy did have romantic feelings for each other? Chances are, we'd get a moment where Natsu remembers the importance of his friends and remember who he is. Are we shocked that this was literally what happened in canon when he did lose control of himself? Or how Dragon Cry did a similar thing, despite prizing Lucy more than other members of the guild?

At this point, I guess someone could look at this and come to the conclusion that Nalu was just a product of Mashima's bad writing. Nalu is romantic but was handled poorly. If Mashima were a better writer, this would have handled better. And as someone who recognizes that, despite having great ideas, Mashima's not a great writer and isn't always able to make them work in the best ways possible and has even made a similar argument with Gruvia...

NO!

Not even a little yes.

At least my argument on Gruvia is couched in a recognition that it's the only ship of its kind that Mashima's done. (People who compare Gruvia to Reina and Musica get the bullet.) I don't see the things I'm arguing isn't great about Gruvia in any other Fairy Tail ship. You can't make the same argument with Nalu and angst. If you do, you're not paying attention.

In just the last arc, we got two clear examples of this in Gajevy and Zervis. Not just in the "you could argue that this is what Mashima was building these ships up towards throughout the series" sense that's very real about both of these ships. In the current events of the arc, he advanced both relationships after they had angsty situations. Gajeel confessed his love to Levy as he was almost killed by Bradman. Mavis and Zeref came together just as he was defeated and they ended up dying together. 

Depending on how you interpret it, Gruvia also got the same thing in the same arc. Jerza has had a similar thing going around it with the Tower of Heaven and Nirvana arc. Fan interpretations of plenty of other favorite ships in Fairy Tail are near dependent on the idea that a person came to love someone more after something tragic happened surrounding them, including a number of my favorite ships. Heck, Mashima did this with all three of the ships involving his main characters in Rave Master to some degree or another.

As much as I don't love every aspect of Mashima's writing, this isn't a symptom of that. The fact is that Mashima didn't use ANY moment that Natsu or Lucy have seen the other in angsty situations to show clear romantic feelings for each other. No kisses, no confession, no anything. Given that he's done that with arguably every main ship he's shown interest in both his big series, I can't help but think that Mashima's either trying something completely different with this ship or isn't ever bringing them closer to being a couple. Either way, I don't see how Mashima putting them in one more magical situation of angst is somehow going to push them over the proverbial edge and make them canon at this stage in the series.

In Conclusion:

I don't hate angst. Nalu is just wack.

[takeyourcritique]

Makoto Niijima: Good Girl, Bad Writing.

In video games, movies, TV, and books, there are always characters who receive copious amounts of praise. In Persona 5, it is no different. Some characters deserve the hype they get, and some.. do not. In my humble opinion, Makoto Niijima falls into the latter category and in this essay I will explain why, as well as delve into what I as a writer would do to improve her character. Because this is not a hate meta, it is merely me articulating my issues with her character and getting my thoughts in order. (She has potential, it merely needs to be utilized and with P5R coming next year, a girl can hope.)

1. Underwhelming Design

The cast of Persona 5, in contrast to the casts before them, are vigilantes, a band of misfits if you will. The entire theme of the game is rebellion against society and fighting the norm, and the characters should reflect this in their design. The only exception is the protagonist himself because he's on probation and attempting to keep a low profile: that's why he follows the dress code to a tee and appears as gentle as possible, because he's already in enough trouble as is. The first party member, Ryuji, has been a rebel for a good amount of time: his hair is a stark blond (which Kawakami-sensei does not approve of) and he wears a very casual version of the school uniform; substituting a bright yellow shirt for the white of the uniform, wearing sneakers instead of dress shoes, and not wearing his suspenders (they're attached though, at the waist).

Ann Takamaki wears a white clover hoodie under her blazer, red leggings under her skirt, brown lace up boots, and earrings; not to mention her hair, while a natural blonde, is pulled back into cutesy pigtails almost like a teenage Harley Quinn. Yusuke doesn't even go to the same school, so his attire stands out in stark contrast with the main trio. Futaba dyes her hair red and she doesn't go to school at all due to severe anxiety; Haru wears a poofy pink sweater over her uniform with Mary Janes and polka dot tights. They all stick out like little sore thumbs. Except Makoto. She basically also follows the dress code, with a few subtle changes:

•She doesn't wear a blazer, instead wearing a black halter vest over her turtleneck

•Black tights

•Brown boots

That's literally it. Nothing about her stands out, and even in her casual clothing she wears a lot of whites and blacks. There's a monochromatic vibe to her, perhaps alluding to her strong sense of justice and distinction between right and wrong which in and of itself isn't bad! But it doesn't fit with the theme of the cast, Makoto fits in too much with the rest of the world to fit in with them. Just by looking at her, you cannot tell she's supposed to be part of the crew and in all honesty she'd fit better working with Akechi due to their very similar views of justice and morals. Hell, some NPCs are more vibrant design-wise than Makoto is.

2. Her Metaverse design, Persona and codename are contradictory.

Makoto's Persona, Johanna, is based most likely off Pope Joan, (after doing research online and reading Johanna's profile on SMT wiki it seemed the best fit) who was a woman that pretended to be a man in order to rise to power in an otherwise male-only role in the Catholic church. And while the story is intriguing, it doesn't fit Makoto at all: she never pretended to be what she was not and while she's "the voice of reason" she's not the leader of the team; Joker is. This makes her codename, "Queen", even more confusing. Nothing about her costume design looks regal whatsoever; it makes no sense. It feels like writer's favoritism, in all honesty. A better name would've been something more related to the fact that she looks like a biker/executionist hybrid; like "Crusher" or something of more..violent nature.

Even a name related to her wanting to go into the force would've worked well: Chief, Lieutenant, etc. Queen is nice, but it doesn't click with Makoto at all, unlike literally everyone else's Persona and codename. Ann's Persona, Carmen, is a femme fatale that kills men. Captain Kidd is a pirate, an iconic symbol of rebellion; Milady, Haru's Persona, is a reference to a villainess of the same name in the 3 Musketeers; Goemon was essentially a Japanese Robin Hood which fits Yusuke's entire kitsune/warrior aesthetic. Joker's Persona, Arsene, is a direct nod to Arsene Lupin; who was one of Sherlock's rivals and a gentleman thief who left calling cards to the people he robbed and a direct parallel to Akechi.

3. Her introduction as a whole, and to the team, is abysmal.

When Makoto is first introduced to the player, the entire school is in turmoil over Kamoshida's abusive actions towards the volleyball and track team. Many people don't know the truth about what's going on, and others simply turn a blind eye because as an Olympic medalist, the gym coach brings in a lot of popularity for the school. Being the student council president, Makoto has power that many other students do not have; so one would assume that upon learning that a victim was in danger she would spring into action, no?

Wrong.

When Ann confronts Makoto about her inaction, she turns the question back on the blonde, asking "What have YOU done for Shiho?" as if it's Ann's fault that Shiho had been jeopardized (which it was not, Ann allowed herself to be blackmailed by Kamoshida in order, so she thought, to protect her best and at the time, only friend). And she doesn't do anything about the situation, claiming that "It has nothing to do with me." (This is how abuse victims DIE.) Even worse, her elder sister is a prosecutor, she could've easily gone to Sae and asked her to look into the matter. Goro Akechi later calls her out on this, as he should; telling her that she is a "good-girl pushover". And when Kamoshida is punished for his crimes, Ann, who was bullied and outcast, goes to Makoto and apologizes to HER to make amends, as if she were wrong. Makoto then replies "We both made mistakes" in a sorry apology (she doesn't even say "I'm sorry" iirc), and asks if she can call Ann by her first name and without honorifics, which in Japan is a symbol of close friendship. (Edit: this apology actually takes place after Kaneshiro's arc, not Kamoshida's, I misremembered.)

You see, calling someone by their given name, even if you are the same age, has a ton of meaning in the culture. Just a year difference between two people can separate them as senpai and kouhai, and while the senpai can call their kouhai by their first name without raising any eyebrows it's not the same for the younger person. Calling someone by their given name in Japan is a privilege, not a right; it represents trust, respect, everything that Makoto and Ann did NOT have.

Now, let me get this straight.

Makoto did nothing when everybody called Ann Kamoshida's hoe, allowed her, Shiho, Akira, Ryuji and Mishima plus many others to suffer abuse (and Shiho attempted suicide!), gave a laughable apology, victim-blamed Ann; and now she wants to be buddy-buddy? What, in any reality, about that is okay? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. But of course, because the writers want us to love Makoto, they have Ann forgive her and let her call her by her first name. And after all that, Makoto is still president, despite her clear nonchalance to the matter. She also does nothing to help the Kamoshida victims after his crimes come to light, when there was literally no excuse anymore not to assist them and help them get back on their feet. Even if she felt powerless with Kamoshida around, that doesn't explain her inaction after he's gone.

Flash forward two Palaces later, when she joins the team. Makoto stalks the protagonist around to gather evidence that he is a Phantom Thief, and then blackmails her way into the ranks. The team of course, is not happy about this at all. Makoto gives them the target; Junya Kaneshiro, who's basically forcing people into debt. The problem here is she has literally no personal ties to him; unlike the main trio all having connections to Kamoshida and Yusuke being Madarame's essential foster son. Tired of Sae calling her useless, Makoto jumps in front of the mob boss's car in desperation (and Ryuji gets her out of the way JUST in time, but he very easily could've died) which puts the entire team in danger and later on is literally pinned down by the mob and the crew have to go and save her because she was so determined to take this dude down she walked into the lion's den without any form of a plan. (He was also going to sell her into prostution to pay off the debt he'd given the Thieves.)

Her Awakening is also really weak: the speech from Johanna is extremely short and then Makoto stomps the ground to avoid falling over, rips off her mask with a bunch of overdramatic screaming (iirc we don't even get to see blood) and whoop-di-doo, she's got a motorcycle! And suddenly, despite all she's done, everybody loves her and thinks she's a total badass when she literally just threw an adult-sized tantrum. The motorcycle itself is also very lazy, it's just a motorcycle with a face. That's it. That's Makoto's Persona. A motorcycle. With. A. Face.

And from then on, everybody's suddenly a-ok and buddy-buddy with Makoto. It's ridiculous and just makes her come off as a Mary Sue because if somebody endangered my life I sure as hell would not be rubbing shoulders with them and I'm quite sure most people feel the same way. And again, after all this, Makoto does not get in trouble or even harshly reprimanded by the school for her extremely reckless actions; when she should have, and had the power to, just call the police or Sae. And all the Thieves somehow are now her friends and she gets to become a superhero.

So let me see if I understand. This girl stalks these people, blackmails them and forces them to go after hardened criminals (she was going to snitch on them if they didn't comply to her demands), goes in guns blazing by HERSELF to attempt to take down the mob boss, has to be rescued..

And gets praised and dubbed a badass for this???

And before you accuse me of having bias against Makoto, let it be known I in no way, shape or form condone Yusuke stalking Ann or Futaba blackmailing the Thieves either. It's. Still. Wrong.

Also, if you unironically think Makoto's stalking is cute, you're wrong. Stalking is creepy, regardless if it's a girl or guy doing it; no one gets a pass.

In addition, Makoto couldn't be bothered to help out at school but then goes after a MOB BOSS and puts herself in unnecessary danger? What's up with that?? If she felt powerless against Kamoshida, why in the world would she take on the Yakuza?

4. Her backstory doesn't mesh well with the rest of the team.

The gang are all outcasts and misfits in one way or another, and their pasts are less than savory.

Protagonist: Falsely accused of assaulting a woman, expelled from school and sent to Tokyo on a year probation despite his innocence, victim of nasty rumors by other students at his new school; abused by his gym coach, no contact with parents.

Ryuji: Abusive, alcoholic father who beat him and llater left him and his mother, abused by his gym coach, leg broken by his gym coach and labeled as a delinquent because his coach lied and acted like Ryuji attacked him, thus alienating him from the track team and by extent; the entire school. Losing his track scholarship because he can't run anymore, ruining his academic career.

Ann: Two parent household but they're never home, leaving her with a caretaker. Faced bullying and isolation due to being biracial (she's a quarter American), only having one friend before joining the Phantom Thieves. Blackmailed by the gym coach and sexually harassed in order to keep this one friend on the volleyball team, labeled as a slut because no one took the time to find out the truth of the matter. Friend is later raped and attempts suicide, Ann attempts to get help from the student council president but is blamed herself for Shiho's predicament. Also judged just for her looks, which she despises.

Yusuke: Biological father died presumably before his birth, biological mother had a seizure and died due to his mentor's negligence. Said mentor then takes Yusuke, a very small child at this point in time, and raises him in isolation. Psychologically (and very likely emotionally) manipulated, Kitagawa grows up in an abusive household and when confronted with the truth, is unwilling to believe it is so (as many abusive victims realistically behave). Later learns the truth about his mother and his mentor's plagiarism and detaches himself from him, but is extremely socially awkward out of touch due to isolation and as a result is isolated at school because no one wants to talk to him.

Futaba: Was blamed for her mother's death (whom she lost at 13-14) and lived with an extremely abusive uncle who underfed her and didn't even let her bathe herself. Developed severe anxiety and became suicidally depressed for over a year, refusing to even come out of her room. Had a friend who was abused by her parents and upon finding out the two fell out and only reconciled years later through the Internet. Bullied in school for her intellect.

Haru: Lost her mother at a young age, engaged against her will to an emotionally abusive, selfish fiancé for the sake of her father's company. Has deep-rooted trust issues due to people being kind to her solely because of her status; or mean for the exact same reasons. Later on lost her father as well at the age of 17, leaving all the responsibility of the company to her as she was the sole heir.

Morgana: Has no memories of who, or what, he used to be and suffers existential crises; suffers from vivid nightmares. Puts up a façade of arrogance to hide insecurities.

Makoto: Mother died when younger, father died in the line of work, older sister forced to become caretaker and work her rear off to provide for the both of them. Pressured into perfection by Sae.

That's.. literally it. Yes, she has no friends at school, but that's by her choice; she isolates herself in her studies and as a result is socially awkward and doesn't know how to interact with people (which makes her even less suitable to be put into any type of leadership position so how she became student council president is beyond me.) Makoto's life is heaven compared to the other Thieves and most of her issues would go away once she gets to college: the rest of the team doesn't have that luxury. By the way, please don't think I'm saying she doesn't deserve to be on the team because she doesn't have as deep a sob story, I'm not saying that at all. It's just that her backstory isn't really utilized as well as it should be and often times conflict is used to try to get the player to feel sorry for her (i.e. Sae calling her useless)

5. Her Confidant is abysmal and cliché.

So Makoto's Confidant actually starts out not half bad! You take her out to play video games and help her come out of her shell initially. But then it shifts to Eiko, an old friend of hers, who is a bad relationship. And this is when the Confidant begins to suffer, because it's not even about Makoto anymore. The president tells Eiko about the danger she's in, and her old classmate does not listen; declaring that since the older girl does not have a boyfriend she couldn't possibly understand. This logic is very flawed; it's like telling a smoker to stop smoking and they tell you "You don't even smoke, you don't know how bad it is". Yet Makoto listens to Eiko and comes to you, the protagonist; and asks you to pretend to be her boyfriend in order to convince her friend that she DOES understand. But it's so awkward Eiko's boyfriend and the girl herself can tell you're not genuine. And you have to keep this up for the rest of the Confidant, not to mention MAX Charm is required from Rank 5 onward in this route. Why?

Because apparently you're not attractive enough otherwise. And it's not even for Makoto, it's for Eiko, to convince her that you're hot enough to compare to her boyfriend; Takase. (Geez, shallow and childish much?) And then at the end of the Confidant, the romance angle comes off as very odd because you're literally treated like an afterthought the entire time and then suddenly Makoto turns around and wants you as her actual boyfriend?? Uh..where was her falling for you during the time spent together? It just feels like it comes outta nowhere, not to mention she wants to be a cop which the law literally ruined Joker's life soooo why is he getting into a romantic relationship with someone who wants to be associated with a source of his trauma? That's like a metaphorical slap in his face.

"Hey, I know you were literally beaten and drugged up, manhandled, falsely accused and put into solitary confinement by the law enforcement, causing you to suffer severe anxiety and you to possibly be scarred forever but I wanna be a cop even though I don't think straight in stressful situations and act on impulse and don't take insults or criticism well; and I want you to stay by my side even though I blackmailed you, stalked you, and endangered your life and did nothing while you were being abused by your gym coach."

(Let's not forget she also didn't say anything about Sae having a Palace until it was almost too late and Joker almost lost Futaba as a result.)

For Valentine's Day she declares "I've been waiting for you for so long" and that genuinely bewildered me because you don't really see her pining at all during her Confidant, nor during other events (the closest thing you get is her clinging to you in Sojiro's house but that's honestly not even romantic that's just her getting frightened and needing assurance in a very unnecessary "ship tease" moment). Same with the scene in Futaba's Palace, while Joker saving Queen was very sweet, he literally would've done that for anybody of his teammates. Makoto is not special in that regard.

6. How to better this character

•Introduce her to the Thieves in a better, more plot driven way, or remove her from the team completely.

Kaneshiro's arc should honestly just be scrapped, it was a sorry attempt to get Makoto on the team. A better time for her to join would be Sae's Palace since she actually has emotional ties to the Palace owner and by this time in the game could've developed to be a better person from the Kamoshida arc, wanting to make things right. This could also be a good start for her and Ann to begin to be on better terms- not even necessarily friends (because after what happened I honestly don't think Ann would want to be friends, at least not close), but learning to at least be civil. That, or she joins out of desperation because she doesn't want anything bad to happen to Sae and as the infiltration continues gets more and more nervous and ultimately rats their plan out (because Makoto as the traitor would be much better, writing-wise).

Alternatively, Hifumi joining instead of Makoto would also be very refreshing with Makoto covering up for them at school and supporting them on the sly.

•Treat her flaws as actual flaws, she's not perfect.

Makoto does have some bad traits, a few being:

•bad tempered

•reckless

•stubborn

•nosy

•hypocritical

•bossy

•socially awkward

But these are almost never treated in a negative light. With the Kamoshida arc and Kaneshiro arc, all is simply forgiven, same with her smacking Eiko across the face in a moment of anger. Even when wrong, Makoto is never wrong per say and this makes it difficult for her to be believable as a character. To fix this, having her suffer the consequences of her actions will make it more realistic. For example, getting Eiko to break up with her boyfriend but cutting ties with her too as a result would give Makoto the rude awakening that you can do the right thing the wrong way and people will not always forgive you for the mess you put them through (nor should they).

Her being punished for unnecessarily putting herself in danger with Kaneshiro would also be understandable (she should've been at least suspended, she could've gotten herself killed, plus all the then existing Phantom Thieves); as well as actually apologizing for the hell that was Kamoshida's drama. And not just to Ann, but everyone who suffered. That would show maturity and a willingness to change, and put her in a better light.

I want Makoto to get mad and she's fully in the wrong and she acknowledges she's wrong, have her recklessness get her or a teammate wounded in battle, etc. And have the others call her out when she's wrong and refuse to let it slide. Have them talk it out, grow as a team. Just..make Makoto fallible, flawed, broken even. She's an orphan, I want to touch more on her having to grow up quickly, feeling lonely and unsure of how to connect with people; talk about how her father is a driving force in her values and morals and how she wishes to honor him by following in his footsteps.

Delve into how she feels less than worthy if she does not achieve excellence but do it in a way that does not demonize Sae unnecessarily and try to make the reader/player feel sorry for her. Have Makoto spend more time with people in her team outside of team duties and while being awkward, genuinely interested and actively working to better her relationships. (She barely interacts with anyone besides Joker, Futaba, and on occasion, Haru) When Makoto is realistically flawed, she then becomes relatable and much more likable.

I want her fears to be plot relevant, not just slapped on for the sake of making her look "cute". Her being scared of the dark was never relevant, unlike Rei from Persona Q who was scared of the dark and had to go through a pitch black room in order to find key cards to help her friends escape a locked room or Yukari being terrified of death and having to come to terms with that. Same with her fixation for Buchimaru, it's cute but it doesn't add any depth to her character whatsoever or even her apparently knowing aikido? We never see Makoto fight outside the Metaverse unlike Chie or Akihiko so it feels like a character trait just slapped on to make her 'cooler'. It feels lazy, because it is. It's like the writers wanted her to be this strong, independent young woman but at the same time a scared, awkward little girl and the two ideas often clash; coming off as contradictory as if they couldn't make their minds up as to who they wanted Makoto to be.

Again, this is not an attack on Makoto fans. If you like her, that's valid and I respect that. I'm merely explaining why I don't and how I feel the writing failed her character and what I believe she'd be if her potential was maximized.

That's all, have a good day.

[shibyn]

and the wind sounds like the world’s sigh

persona 4 & 5 | shiho-centric, investigation team Near the end of May, Shiho transfers to a sleepy town called Inaba for a fresh start. However, Inaba isn’t the sleepy town her parents thought would be best for her— its on edge with unsolved mysteries, and Shiho finds that there’s a bit more behind what meets the eye regarding some of her classmates and a TV screen.

chapter 1: inhale | 2.4k | ao3

Maybe this is hell. It's a white ceiling, off-white walls, bright white lights, white bedsheets. It's the bland meals, kind but insincere conversations, background noise of the news. Sad, prolonged looks from Mom, regretful frowns from Dad, the overall lack of feeling from her legs. The monotone beep of the heart monitor and drip of the IV. Hell can't be dark and fiery and the screams of the damned-- it has to be this. 

Ann is a light in this place. The blonde of her hair offsets the white entirety of the room, the radiance of her smile breaking the solemn air that's been stagnant. She can't always visit, but Shiho looks forward to the times she can. She's the inch of normalcy left in Shiho's life-- she tells her about things that have been going on in school, a cool photoshoot she was in, a dumb thing Ryuji was up to, a shiny A on a test that she only passed because Akira helped, a new restaurant the three of them went to-- she's glad, so glad that Ann hasn't let this change her, hasn't let the wobble of her lips when she looks towards Shiho's legs keep her from looking her in the eye and talking as if they weren't in a hospital. More often than not, Ann isn't there. She isn't there, and sometimes Shiho thinks it may have been better to land differently, breaking more than just her legs. She's confined to bed, confined to sleep and watching tv and staring at the wall. She's stuck, legs basically useless, and she has to sit through looks of pity from the doctor, her nurses, her physical therapist, her parents. Her skin crawls whenever her parents visit. They know what happened, but they don't know. They're so quiet when they visit, so sad, so pitying, and she has no idea what they're thinking. She hopes and hopes for the door to slide open whenever they're here, hopes the doctor does a checkup on vitals or the therapist takes her to learn how to use her legs again or Ann to come bounding in and dispel them. She's not lucky. They stay and they speak of things so mundane-- at least it's nice to talk with Ann, but with her parents it all feels awkward and forced and Shiho wishes she had the gut to tell them to stop, they don't understand, don't act like you understand. They aren't in the room the day Ann enters, eyes both bright and watery. Ann basically crashes in the seat next to her bed, grasps her hand so tight she's momently scared it'll snap, and tells her it's all over, he's in jail, he got what he deserved, he's gone. Shiho cries and Ann cries with her, and maybe, just maybe she'll be able to walk those wretched halls again and graduate side-by-side with Ann like they imagined and maybe she'll meet Ryuji and Akira and give them the biggest hug possible and hopefully hang out with them at Big Bang Burger or the Arcade. Her hopes soar, and she wishes she could stand so she could hug Ann and leave this awful room. Her parents walk in the next day, faces drawn in, and tell her we're going to move when you're released from the hospital. We're sorry, Shiho. Shiho doesn't cry. She just hopes her legs will stay broken, so she can still at least stay here and see Ann regularly.

—

Her legs ache the moment she steps off the train into the Yaso-Inaba Station. They've ached the moment she stepped on the train and throughout the whole ride. Shiho takes this as an ill omen. The car ride to the house is in a terse silence with occasional awkward conversations between her parents, similar to the train ride over. Inaba, her parents had told her, was a tiny rural town. A big difference from the metropolitan style of Tokyo. A good place for a fresh start, they said. Shiho can see between the lines and know they chose this place because nothing happens here. (She knows that they think if it's a peaceful place, there's less of a chance of her ending up in an ambulance midday and missing two months of her life. If it's peaceful, bad things won't happen. They won't.) It takes less than twenty minutes flat to drive to their house-- in Tokyo, on good days it would have taken twenty minutes to drive a mile. It's a small house, different from their even smaller apartment in Tokyo. They actually have a backyard. It's on the edge of Inaba and supposedly not too far from her new high school. Unpacking is quiet aside from the occasional 'put that in the kitchen' and 'can you help me carry this?' Thankfully it's cloudy outside, so it isn't too much of a chore. Most heavy things, like furniture, were delivered before hand, which cuts the labor. They apparently make enough noise for a neighbor to come out and greet them. Her mom ends up side-tracked talking to them, so she and her dad finish unpacking to avoid being dragged into the conversation. It's a single story house, small kitchen, small living room, two small rooms, two small bathrooms, and yet its still more spacious than their old apartment. Shiho claims the bedroom facing the backyard. Her dad helps bring in some boxes and offers to help set up furniture before Shiho shoos him off. Her room slowly comes together. She slowly puts things on the dresser, on the wall, in the closet, until it looks vaguely like her old room. It has all the same elements, but it doesn't register in her mind as her own yet. She goes about it in a detached sense, like her body is on autopilot. One year, Shiho thinks, this is my home for one year. She comes across her next uniform that her parents snuck in her boxes-- a black seifuku with a glaringly bright yellow ribbon and houndstooth patterned skirt. It's... something, to say the least. Not the worst uniform she's ever seen, but... well, it's definitely something. She guesses she can call it stylish for a school uniform. She lays it out on her bed, smoothing it out absently. There's no true blazer, so she can't exactly get away with just wearing the undershirt. She misses the plaid of Shujin, regardless of how ugly she thought it was at first. Her first day is... tomorrow, maybe? The day after? Her mom had told her, but it felt like fuzz in her ears. She doesn't want to think about school. Belatedly, she takes a picture to send it to Ann later. Ann was at a photoshoot right about now-- she couldn't exactly check her phone every now and then and respond to her. The lack of consistent buzzing from her phone made the whole unpacking process more quiet. Half-way through the next box, her dad reappears at the doorway, leaning in a casual way against the frame. He whistles in awe at the progress she's made, saying, "Wow, already this far? Sorry, sweetie, but you're gonna have to do the kitchen and living room at this pace." She rolls her eyes. "Sure thing. It'll probably be useless, though-- you'd probably reorganize it to your liking." He shrugs. "It's going to take weeks before your mother and I find an equilibrium in that kitchen. Ya close to a stopping point? I was kinda thinking bout getting dinner." She isn't, but the dust is starting to get to her. Besides-- this is might be the first time he's looked her in the eyes in a week. Maybe things are turning for the better. "Sure. I think I saw a take out place not too far away on the drive here." In a blocky motion, she pulls herself to her feet. Getting up to her feet was no longer easy. It was a struggle, even after so much physical therapy. She liked to think it was okay now. Yet-- her leg twists and twinges painfully, her breath catching in her throat as her world tilts. There's a flash of movement from the corner of her eyes in her dad's direction, but she manages to catch herself by slamming a stabilizing hand against the wall. Shiho swallows thickly, breathing slowly to calm the spike of her pulse at the sudden feeling of falling. She glances up warily. Her dad's hand is halfway towards her, as if to catch her if she didn't regain her footing, with the other braced against the door frame with white knuckles. There's a pause, a bit deafening, and her father retreats his hand and crams it in his pocket. A scowl sits on his face, the corner of his mouth twitching with unspoken words, and he quickly pulls on a grin that doesn't fit his face. "That was close," he laughs, a bit wheezily and with a tremor in the undertone. He shifts awkwardly, maybe debating to check if she's fine or to let her be. I wonder what went through his mind just now, Shiho thinks, throat tight, did he see my leg breaking? or them shattered, beneath hospital blankets? or maybe-- "Ah, you may have to start wearing your brace more often, kiddo. It's kinda hilly and rainy around here." Grimacing, she nods. "I'll put it on before we go." It's on her dresser, where she threw it after taking it off earlier to give her leg some air. She hates that thing-- it's hot and sweaty and itchy and it always seems to get disgusting in less than an hour. It's going to be miserable to wear it in the rain-- it'll become soggy and she'll have to deal with the spongey feel of it the whole school day. A moment passes. Her dad still lingers by the doorframe. He clears his throat and scratches his arm absently. "Are you going to be alright?" he asks, looking anywhere but her. "Yeah," she says quickly, and back tracks. "Yeah. I-- I'm alright. Just a little sore from the ride." Her legs are never not sore nowadays. Not that they need to know. There's a solemn look on his face. Shiho grits her teeth and thinks please don't. He nods-- she can't tell if he's satisfied with that answer or not-- and leaves. For a second, she just stands and breathes. Everyone around her has been walking on eggshells since she landed in the hospital, and she's so tired of it. She wonders how long it'll take until it's all gone and done for. Her mom trusts them with dinner, saying that she's in unpacking mode and doesn't want to drop out of it now that she's in it. The car ride is quiet for the most part, with the two of them peering out the window to spy a places to eat or figure out what something is. There's plenty of tiny mom-and-pop stores just a walk away from their house, and the Main Street isn't too far of a walking trip, either. Shiho has a feeling she'll become familiar with these streets in due time. The sun had set enough to the point where it was fairly dark out with the overcast. The clouds aren't lit up orange with city lights, and there's an underwhelming amount of obnoxiously neon signs on these streets. Some store signs aren't even lit up-- just how rural is this place? Oh!-- then, maybe when the nights aren't cloudy, she'll be able to see the stars? They end up parking at a brightly-lit grocery store and wander to a nearby takeout restaurant. The air's thick with rain soon to come and is quite chilly for spring-- the warmth of the restaurant they slip into is more than welcoming. It's a small place-- a few tables are set up inside with a couple tables occupied. Shiho very pointedly avoids their wandering curious stares. Three boxes of noodles ends up being the price of a single nice meal in Tokyo. And even better, from what she could peer at in the restaurant, they're possibly the best looking noodles she's seen in years. Not grossly greasy, or dangerously overcooked. The chunks of beef and chicken shine with just the right amount of sauce, and the vegetables don't seem still half frozen from the freezer. Sweet n Sour, General Tso's, Teriyaki-- the smell makes her want to crack a box open in the car, and from the pace her dad walks at, he wants to, too. Ah. The lack of city lights also makes the lights of a police car much more stark. Both her and her dad falter-- they aren't near their car, were they? God, what if the police around here were crazy strict about parking between the lines. Her dad didn't have a great streak with being completely center, and the parking lot was empty, so he didn't exactly try-- what luck would that be, not even six hours in Inaba and they've already gotten a ticket. But as they step closer, the car is parked in a side street close to the market. Her dad's shoulders drop in relief when there's no-one  by his car. There are some standing outside the police cars, like there's something going on. One glances up and spots the two of them ogling. He smiles disarmingly at them, nods to his companion, and approaches. "Good evening," the officer says kindly. His hands are neatly tucked into his jacket pockets, posture open yet with a tension along his shoulders. "Sorry to bother the two of you this evening. I'm required to ask anyone I see, though— have you seen any suspicious activity nearby, recently? Biker gangs, suspicious figures, anything?" "No," her dad says curtly, his eyes drifting in the direction of the side street with a confused frown. Biker gangs? Suspicious people? Shiho thinks absently, shifting the bag on her arm anxiously, wait, didn't they say— didn't they say nothing happens around here? "We moved in today. Is something wrong?" A dawning realization crosses the officer's face. "Ah. No, not-- not necessarily. We're just keeping watch." The officer seems to mentally juggle what he should say. He ends up frowning and says, "Well... a first-year at Yasogami by the name of Tatsumi Kanji went missing recently, last seen by his mother's textile shop. He's possibly involved with activity in biker gangs. If you hear anything about him or see any activity, be sure to report it, yeah?" The smile her dad gives the officer is tense. "Understood. Thank you." Dinner isn't going to be as pleasant as she thought it would be.

[sokumotanaka]

Alright I wanna start this out with something important:

Yes Ryuji is an abuse victim so is everyone else on the team, doesn’t mean ryuji gets to act the way he does. I’m an abuse victim I was teased, beaten up and had things thrown at me because I was black by my white peers, but depsite being so young I was able to distigush that from my interactions with white people in the future, I was able to tell instantly that they weren’t jerks cause they were white but because they with stupid bigots not raised right,

I also wanna state this right off the bat that talking about any character’s faults should not turn into what abouting another character’s faults to soften the faults and mistakes said character, ryuji has done.

Moving on Ryuji regardless of what anyone says is in charge of his own words he’s not possessed by a ghost or forced to be this way by any abusive past because there are plenty of fulfilled and deep characters in persona that are still respectful and rational despite having horrible lives. Let’s use Shinji as an example, shinjiro was a man who was brash and curt because he feared that the more people stay close to him the more his powers could hurt them, he pushed people away because of the life he took and the family he accidently broken, despite that he wanted to still do good and was only cold when he had to be and when he called say akihiko out by addressing old wounds he was appropriately hit and called out for it. (And no this isn’t condoling physical violence that’s just how aki is)

But like Yusuke JUST learned about his surrogate father killing his mother and while he’s about to probably break down Ryuji decided to scoff at him and specifically say “You aren’t gonna cry are you?” and even if the tone in japan and english were a mistake  (which they weren’t japan would have corrected for that; Ryuji still decided to say those specific words.

Not to mention that’s not the only time he’s been disrespectful and no him being an abuse victim or a teenager doesn’t mean he gets away with it, nor does he get to take his abusiveness out on other people.

Like the time where he compared futable to morgana knowing morgana has indentity and isecurity in being useful (which is stupid and here’s why) Morgana taught them how to sneak in and out places, theif tools, alot of the early plans hingh on him and even then he adds alot to the overall series plans, he’s the one who ask futaba to hack the phone. Morgana is the second most useful party member; he’s also their getaway alive vehicle, when ryuji stupidly activated the metanav and sent them into a desert, morgana didn’t get lazy or complain or had to be told, he turned into a car and offered the ride.

I’m just saying Morgana has much more to offer than Ryuji and Ryuji fanned those flames putting that all on futaba for no reason and morgana who without him ryuji would get nowhere fast.

Last stretch

And in the end the cat apologized and Ryuji never did for driving morgana away in the first place, so it seems like to me Ryuji is literally abusing someone himself.

The time they were trying to flirt with girls and when one of them spoke he said to her face “weird accent.”  Ryuji has no filter or respect and he doesn’t learn by the end of both games he’s in; it says something that Morgana doesn’t chastise ryuji anymore after well makoto joins but even more the team gather to literally tell morgana sorry, Futaba yells at him that he needs to apologize and when he’s there he literally shits on him right there.

Morgana’s about to come back and instead of swallowing his pride and admitting he’s a big source of the team’s problems, yelling out phantom thieves everywhere like an idiot, literally using the fact that he has superpowers as a reason why they should be rolling in women or money despite doing all that ot literally get rid of people who abuse that. Getting upset cause the girls on his team dont kiss his butt, one of his excuses being “we helped save them” as if they also didn’t save ryuji’s dumb butt plenty of times, it’s a team not a reward system, it also says something that when ryuji says these things a room full of people look at him and say how stupid the take is; or you the player have the option to disagree with him and steer him back on track of being a hero….cause it’s morally right.

And not because in the end you’ll get a reward, it’s superhero 101; in the end Ryuji has alot of problems he has to work out; him being thoughtful, smart, understanding and mature is something he needs to take from his social link and people need to stop being over backwards for him because they can excuse his abuse for literally being just as bad in the game himself, it’s not cute, it’s not Atlus being bad at writing cause p3 is a banger and persona 4 was popular (though overhyped and oversaturated) for a reason and the characters here are well written too,, But Ann and Ryuji have a serious case of whiplash from their SL to their canon portrayals.

Ryuji needs to take things from his Social link and Ann needs to put her canon personality into her social link cause “stupid white american girl” was dead and stupid in p2, let’s leave that in the past.

-I still want them to repay me for makig mark a black persona user with a spear chucker and graffiti and he gets called a money and put in jail? why did they THINK this is the rep we’d want? Repay me back in persona 6 you dicks-

You’ll also notice I didn’t bring up the fact that you tried using other characters faults as crutches for Ryuji which I wont address cause derailing to topic to point at the faults of another is a recipe for ignoring a character’s problematic traits, we are not kylo ren’ing this.

Anyway I dont expect you to agree and that’s fine, I’m not trying to get people to hate ryuji but realize “why” they like him and where his real faults lie and the faults in his writing fall, he should of apologized to morgana cause as it stands now, the cat is the more mature one for having the guts to face his faults and they weren’t even his ryuji was just an ass, and a getaway vehicle is more useful than ...not having one.

Thanks for reading all the way if you did, I’d give you a monies if I had any. Still I do genuinely hope we talk more in the future, maybe about what we’d like to see more in the future or whatever fancies, thank you and take care.

[askingexorcists]

*sees you're opening the ask box and runs over* I love your hcs omg ovo)b. Ryuji has been changing since he became focused on learning from Lewin, don't you think? I liked him before, but now that I see how hard working he is, he's become one of my favourite characters! Can I have some hcs about Ryuji in daily life? What do you think he likes to do besides the things in his schedule? Guilty pleasures? Favourite subject? Flower? Colour? etc. ILU *kisses*

omg this has taken so long I’m so sorry :((

btw, the ask box never closed? It’s always open because I’m a stupid little twat and refuse to close it despite never getting shit done…

So we know that Ryuji starts his day very early

But this wasn’t always the case

In fact when he was younger (like under 8) his mother literally had to drag him out of bed

He hated getting up in the mornings 

Sometimes his father even tried bribing him to get up

Which his mother was furious at

In elementary school he was the cool kid

Everyone followed him around and always asked him, what he wanted to play

His favourite subject was maths

He found it easy and he got to sit next to some of his friends so they always had a lot of fun together 

In middle school he was really popular and often got asked out a lot by girls

He normally turned them down just because he was a little shy and wanted to focus on his studies (& becoming an exorcist & taking over his dads temple)

He broke his ankle once playing soccer 

Everyone signed his cast

Shima was insanely jealous he got out of gym

He even tried to break his own ankle 

Which he said it was so Bon would have someone to be with (but he was just lazy)

In middle school his favourite subject was geography and art

He enjoyed learning about different cultures allover the world

He assumed if he were to be an exorcist he should know knowledge from different countries

But he found them generally interesting as well

Art he enjoyed not because he was some deep shit who liked to express themselves but just because he was a kid and most kids like to draw

Just so happens he was a great artist

On the first day of cram school Bon thought Paku was cute, but never voiced his opinion allowed

Kinzou got Bon into ‘rock’ music when he was in middle school

Ever since then he’s discovered bands and artists in similar genres and often dragged Shima to concerts with him

Koneko sometimes went too but he didn’t like the loud atmosphere 

When Bon was 5 he won a goldfish at the fair and named it Satan

Shima suggested it as a name and he thought it was cool

They were too young to understand much then other then they’d hurt people talk about someone named that

His parents begged him to change it

He cried for five hours straight after Satan died only four days later

His childhood dream job was to become a superhero, then he changed it to policeman, and then again to exorcist

His favourite animals are Monkeys and tortoises 

Ryuji enjoys exploring local shrines and temples

He likes to know the history behind them 

He also likes writing

Not writing stories but just letters

He loves practising his handwriting and kanji

He also likes learning new languages 

He’s currently working on Latin, English, Russian

When he’s bored he’ll either watch TV or read manga 

Or he’ll go out with Rin, Koneko and shima

They normally go to some cafe together, maybe study there as well

Or they just hang out at the mall together

He also enjoys playing sports as well

Baseball and football is what they normally play

Bon doesn’t really have a favourite flower

But he remembers his mother always had flowers blooming in the garden in various different seasons

He remembers liking the Asagao flowers

In floral language it means ‘bond of love’

He has a memory of his mother putting them around the house when guests came as well

He always wanted to touch them because they were so pretty

Like the flowers, his favourite colour is blue

Not because of the flowers though

He’s just always liked the colour blue

He also liked yellow as well

Pikachu yellow and Ocean blue

He’ll never admit it but he thinks the colour of Rin’s flames is the prettiest shade of blue he’s ever seen

In high school, his favourite subjects are Science and Social Studies -a combination of Geography, History (both World and Japanese)

Some of his guilty pleasures include mochi ice cream

He also likes to drink green tea 

His mother sends him a care package every month and includes special herb teas and such for his migraines

He sometimes sneaks Shima’s dirty manga to read

He won’t ask for it

He knows Shima will probably tell his mom just because he’s a prick

He also loves to play on his DS

His favourite games are Pokemon, Fire Emblem, Super Mario

He, Rin and Renzou often get together and play video games together 

When he isn’t playing games, he’s cleaning

He refuses to eat in bed because of the crumbs

Then if one night he does, he won't sleep until he’s changed every sheet, every blanket colour, and swept/vacuumed the surrounding area

I feel like I went off track but idk?? I hope you enjoyed them! Feel free to send in random/general hc’s for other aoex squad 

[graveyardshift-writer]

Endearment and Enmity Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh. Title: Endearment and Enmity Rating: T-M depending on chapter, M overall Summary: When you're literally married to the person you despise. Warnings: Homosexual relationships,vulgar words and adult situations. Author's Note: I don't know why I wrote this. Chapter 3: Forward. "Kaiba-sama, a man and his son and here to see you." Jonouchi inwardly flinched when one of the LVN's referred to him by his married name; something he'd probably never be used to. He kept his disgust to himself as he turned to face the young nurse. "Understood, thank you; but why isn't the doctor seeing him?" "The doctor has, she wants you to coax the boy into taking his medicine. You know children don't respond to her like they do to you." Jonouchi couldn't help but roll his eyes. "Alright. Which room are they in?" "Fifty." As Jonouchi walked to the room he could swear he could hear the other nurse giggle; which made him suspicious as first but he ended up just shrugging it off. Females, as much as he loved them, were strange creatures. He walked into the room, and was taken aback. "Jou!" The man, father of the boy he was supposed to be attending to, was grinning as he walked over. An all-too-familiar man. "O-Otagi?" Jonouchi stammered slightly before breaking into his own grin over seeing a friendly familiar face in the dice master. Ryuji Otogi looked very similar to how he had as a teen, but was dressed casually and more conservatively. His dark hair was trimmed and kept in a neater style but still in a ponytail in the back, the rims of his eyes were clear from lack of eyeliner, and his dice earrings were now just gold hoops, which Jonouchi supposed were supposed to match the golden band around his finger. Against his shoulder he held a small toddler-aged boy. "I heard you were working here and almost couldn't believe it." The dark haired man told his old friend with a small smile "But I saw your name on the employee roster in the hallway and requested you." "Really? Wow. I haven't been able to meet up with anyone yet." Truthfully he knew that his friends knew him well enough to see his frustration over his marriage with Kaiba as soon as the subject would be brought up. Luckily, Otogi just couldn't see right through him like Yugi, Anzu and Honda could. "Is it true though… Did you really tie the knot with Kaiba?" Well son of a bitch, that topic came up quickly. Jonouchi managed to keep a straight face as he pointed to his name tab which clearly read 'Katsuya Kaiba' a name the blonde had no attachment to. "Wow, I guess I should start calling you Kaiba then huh." "Please don't." Jonouchi told him, trying not to sound as exasperated as he really was "Can you introduce me to your son?" That should get Otogi off the topic, parents loved gushing about their kids. He was relieved when he was proven to be right as the dark haired man turned his baby boy to face Jonouchi. The boy had very dark brown hair that shot up in random spikes, and green eyes just like his father, but his skin was tan compared to Otogi's pale. He was oddly familiar, but then again all babies looked the same in the CRNA's opinion. "What's the boys name?" "Chokichi." Otogi told him as he lightly bounced the small toddler, who only continued to absentmindedly suck on his thumb. That made Jonouchi quirk a brow at the similarity the baby shared with another one. "That's ironic, Honda's son has the same name-" Before the blonde could properly finish his sentence, the other man started to chuckle, making him pause "Hey what's so funny, guy?" "Didn't Honda ever tell you?" Otogi continued to chuckle, then cleared his throat "Chokichi is mine and Honda's son, we had him together." "..." Jonouchi fell silent. Honda and Otogi? His former classmate had a ring on, did that mean he was married to Honda? And they somehow had a kid together? "What?" Honda had sent him a ton of pictures of the baby the minute the kid had been born, but he always dodged the question on who the 'mother' was, which at the time had Jonouchi come to the conclusion that some girl he'd slept with just ditched the baby on him. Turned out there was no mother. "...How?" "That's a story for another time." Otogi's eyes held a glint "Me and Honda aren't married since it isn't legal yet, we have a domestic partnership however. We attended the same university and fell in love there." Although Jonouchi supposed he should have felt happy for his friends, it still felt like a stab to just now hear about all of that. Honda had been his friend since middle school, and yeah neither of them were the best when it came to calling, but he couldn't have at least mentioned once he was involved with Otogi and had even started a family together? "Interesting..." He muttered in an almost Kaiba-esque way, which he caught right away. Gross, the bastard was starting to rub off on him. "Well, can you tell me what's wrong with the little guy?" "He's had a fever for the past few days and he can't shake it off..." Otogi explained as he gently stroked the baby's head. "Hm. Simple thing man, doesn't sweat. This is probably just a bacterial infection - kids put everything into their mouths you know. We'll give him some fluid and electrolytes and probably some broad-spectrum antibiotics. But let me ask a few questions first; what kind of symptoms has he shown?" "Fever, crying to the point of screaming… isn't eating and can't sleep well." Jot. "Does he have any allergies?" "Bee stings." Jot. "Does he take any medications currently?" "Just some baby cough medicine." Jot. "Has this happened before?" "No, he hasn't run a fever like this before." Jot. "What was the last thing he ate or drank?" "Cold formula milk, and a little bit of applesauce." Jot. "What was going on before he came down with the fever?" "Just… normal stuff. We took him out for a walk out at the little kids park." Jot. Just as he took the last note the baby started to loudly cry, his flushed face growing to the likeness of an angry tomato. "No, baby shh, it's okay..." Otogi told the baby softly and rocked him, rubbing his back and trying to calm him down in all of the usual ways. Still a little alien seeing Otogi so gentle. "Alright you wait here, I'll go consult his pediatrician." From the cupboard he quickly produced a pedialyte bottle, a special type of juice for babies with plenty of electrolytes, very important for fevers. "Give him this, the fevers probably dehydrating him." The dark haired man nodded and took the bottle, coaxing the small boy into drinking from it. -/- "What's wrong with you today?" Kaiba asked, more out of curiosity than actual concern. Jonouchi had come into his office after work as he sometimes did, which the brunet requested as to keep up appearances. Jonouchi's teeth ungritted just enough to ask"Did you know that Otogi and Honda were partners?" His… spouse, didn't bother to so much as look up from his computer screen. "Well… Did you?" Jonouchi had just gotten off of work and changed before heading over, he tried texting and calling Honda but had gotten no response, and he'd grown so frustrated in silence that now he had to take it out on someone even if it had to be the guy he hated for holding him as a basically a hostage-bride. "I might have heard at some point in time from my brother, but I don't go out of my way to keep track of the cheerleader squad. So, I'm gonna have to say no." The CEO cooly replied, typing away. "I can't believe that he wouldn't tell me. I've known that asshole since we were troublemaking shits of kids. I've scraped his ass off of the sidewalk like bubblegum so many times- Kaiba, would you at least pretend you see me as a regular person as look at me while I talk to you?" Just to prove his point and frustration he gripped the couch and shoved it over onto it's back. Kaiba at least acknowledged him by looking up and stopping his excessive typing. "I mean, I'm not expecting the guy to tell me each and every one of his most intimate secrets. But that's a big part of his life and he never bothered to tell me." The blue-eyed man crossed his arms with a disapproving hum "What do you expect? Did you think that you and your clique would remain friends forever once high school ended? Wake up, friendship doesn't last forever no matter how much you preach, they moved on. And so should you." Honestly, Kaiba had almost forgot just how emotional the other duelist could be. "This is coming from the guy who spent millions of dollars taking control of a city for a duel monsters tournament because you couldn't accept defeat." Jonouchi retorted. Kaiba's hand tightened around his own forearm. He'd been a little hot-blooded back then, but his loss to Yugi all those years ago never felt right… perhaps because the boy who beat him wasn't Yugi at all, but the spirit of the puzzle. Even in the Grand Prix, losing to Yugi didn't feel right. Why? Because even if he was dueling the spirit of the puzzle, the spirit was in the end just a spirit… He wasn't his true self, he wasn't at his full strength with his own memories or ambitions, he was in the end just a powerful extension of Yugi. That was why he had gone so far as to see the Pharaoh in the afterlife, because his old rival owed him a real duel. Even if he hadn't won, he still had the closure he needed to move on with his life. "Stop looking back Katsuya, you're not supposed to be going that way." Kaiba answered cryptically as he resumed his work. Jonouchi glared coldly at him. "Everyone has a past Kaiba, even you. You think I don't know that you named that hospital after the Orphanage you came from?" The brunet paused again "Whatever, you're no help. I'm going back to the mansion, and I'm not fixing the damn couch. " With that the REBD turned away and left, ultimately venting didn't help. And he felt no closer to his… spouse. Oh well, yet another night of dry sobbing into his pillow and jacking it. TO BE CONTINUED Authors note: So the clinic is named after the orphanage that the Kaiba brothers came from, that's what I've decided. And yes, there you go, Otogi and Honda are a couple with an adorable little shit of their own. As stated before, this fanfiction takes place years after the Dark Side of Dimensions, where Kaiba somehow comes back from the afterlife after his duel with Atem. He didn't win, but after having finally gotten a fair duel with no one else but him and and the Pharaoh, he found closure and could finally move on. Please leave a review.

[it-will-not-last-the-night]

Victimhood-P5 the end

Or: Because I still had one of these in me.

Put simply knocking out a friend, who has done nothing wrong, and then abandoning them at night on a street with no form of protection at all, is evil.

How do I support my protagonist characters when I know they are willing to sink to such immoral actions?

This is the problem I now have. When I play Persona 5 I am now constantly aware of things which make me grate me teeth;

1) My protagonist can be a womanizing asshole with little to no repercussions. Apparently treating women as simple trophies to be acquired is better than being Ryuji.

2) My protagonist is at best too afraid to protect Ryuji from completely unjustified physical beatings and near-constant verbal abuse. The Phantom Thieves as a whole are a group who claim to be opposed to Abuse but, when it comes to Ryuji, happily practise and enable it themselves so long as he is the victim.

3) The game dips into homophobia (AND FURTHER ABUSE OF RYUJI) with its depicition of the homosexual male couple.

4) The game’s ending moral for Ryuji is that he is a ‘no-good son’, ‘idiot’, ‘pathetic’, ‘worthless’ and ‘rotten child’ who’s only value exists in serving as an extension of the protagonist, any individual agency he has is instantly determined to be wrong.

5) Physical and Verbal abuse of Ryuji is simply tacticly approved of, with the game going so far as, in the Ship-ending and Ryuji’s Track Team-ending, effectively stating Ryuji DESERVES TO BE PHYSICALLY BEATEN. We, as the protagonist, have the literal option to tell him he DESERVES IT!

Imagine, IMAGINE, one of the female characters being treated like this. Imagine Ann being told that her victimization at Kamoshida’s hands was HER fault, and allow Shiho to punch her for it. Imagine Makoto almost died after making a selfless gesture and then returned later and was beaten upon by the entire group, then left abanonded somewhere on a street whilst they went off and enjoyed themselves without her.

THIS ISN’T FUNNY. Its abuse. I hate it. Abuse is horrible, living with it made me feel like less than a person, and I at least didn’t have friends telling me I deserved it or abandoning me when I was going through it. Abuse is wrong.

6) Sexism. Just. No. This game and women and the protagonist. No. How do I even begin? Basically ever female character you meet can only develop feelings for one boy in all the world, your teacher becomes an ultimate fantasy for objectification, all female Palace holders are redeemable and all female characters recieve far more coddling than the equally suffering and broken male cast. There is literally volumes about the way this game handles women which could be written and I don’t have the mental fortitude to organize now. To put it bluntly; Persona 5′s writing virtually veers into being a single step away from traditional anime/manga harem style ‘women can only be attracted to the protagonist’ and ‘now woman is evil they just need the protagonist to redeem them with his awesome’.

I keep coming back to that scene though. Ann, Makoto, Futaba and Haru beat up a crippled boy. They physically attack a cripple. And Yusuke and Morgana and the Protagonist are FINE with this. I’m tempted to just quote and go; ‘our protagonists ladies and gentlemen’ since the action is simply, very plainly, evil.

Not to mention the fact that Futaba and Ann are dedicated throughout the game to making sure Ryuji understands he will always and forever be alone and he should accept it. I mean...it even builds into yet another scene I can’t understand. Ryuji mentions hitting it off with some girls, and Futaba and Ann instantly respond that he must be lying, and I have no idea what to believe. Ryuji practically never lies to the group ever so it seems strange to imagine he’d suddenly, this one time, concoct such a grandiose deception, but, at the same time, the game does hammer in consistently that almost all things female find Ryuji inherently repulsive, so Ann and Futaba seem to make a point. So what am I meant to believe? That was just the one day Ryuji felt like lying to his friends?

Why is Ryuji so detestable to all things female in any case? He never asks Ann to strip naked for him as Yusuke and the protagonist can, he doesn’t cheat on seven women at once as the protagonist can (and then still can romance them as well).

I honestly wish Ryuji died. Just to escape the pain. I wish he’d been revealed to be the traitor. That his feelings of isolation and worthlessness were taken advantage of to manipulate him into betrayal and then he’d died so the suffering would stop. It’d probably be a smarter commercial move too as Akechi could then be made a replacement for Ryuji and Akechi is FAR more popular than Ryuji is (despite being a straight up murderer). So I’m sure most fans would get behind it too.

But there really is nothing for it or how else do I say it? I should probably write some fanfics to express my interpretations since I struggle to spit out more without delving into calling every other character monstrous (and I do still like them, I jus can’t get over this single aspect as it taints the entire end product for me).