#he has BOTH sides against him AND a missing T-cog

[peace-hunter]

tfone au where OP is created as the last of the primes but way after them, a sparkling born at what were thought to be the last days of the war against the quintessons, the beginning of a new generation of peace after eons of war. a child meant to be loved and raised knowing nothing of war nor sacrifice.

he's kept mostly out of the spotlight by his siblings, who don't wish to expose him to everyone's optics so young, and want to wait until the war is done and over to properly introduce him to their people.

except of course the primes are betrayed and murdered by sentinel, the war is lost and everyone who knows and cared for the truth is either banished or outright killed in order to suppress it.

and the high guard, the ones the primes trusted the most, the ones that were supposed to protect them, the ones who failed in their most important duty, have to make a choice. to take the last prime, their last hope, with them to the surface, a hostile environment where there's little to no supplies and where they'll be hunted down by both sentinel and the quintessons as the biggest threat to their regimen.

or hide him in plain sight. place him where sentinel won't think to look for him. one more sparkling among many. and hope it will be enough to keep him alive. pray to primus that he'll protect his last child long enough for them to come back for him when it's safer (even if most of them have already lost their faith on him when he allowed the rest of his children to be massacred like that)

they almost lose their resolve when they realize they will have to take the little one's cog away in order to make him blend in with the rest of the newborns (and oh do they burn with murderous intent when they see what sentinel has done to their people but it's not the time yet-) but in the end they decide an impaired little prime is better than a dead one.

and so in the chaos of thirteen dead primes and a sudden energon crisis, a little sparkling who very few mechs really knew about and even fewer had seen completely vanishes. and in the depths of iacon a mech in charge of a new batch of newborns scratches their helm in confusion as they realize they must have miscounted the first time.

optimus prime is quietly erased from any official records by sentinel, written off as dead when they find a sparkling's frame mangled beyond recognition after an attack on the base of those rebels that insist on being a thorn on his side. killing the sparkling hadn't been precisely in his plans, he probably could've found some use for it after all, but he's not particularly upset about it either.

and orion pax grows up with an ache on his spark that tells him he's missing something far more important than a t-cog and dreams of gentle and loving hands, cradling him against the frames of mechs he cannot recall the faces of.

[psychedelic-pebble]

Leashed — Stanford Pines x GN!Reader

hey guys haha i havent posted a proper fic in a while so here, this one is super embarrassing though please dont look at me 😭

Warnings: NSFW Content, Petplay, Puppyplay, BDSM, Dom!Stanford, Sub!Reader, P in V Sex, Mild Breeding - MDNI.

Stanford has always been an adventurous man, so it comes to the surprise of absolutely no one that it translates over into the bedroom as well. You match his pace incredibly well, springing new ideas and scenarios on him whenever possible. He’s always been willing to give new things a shot, so long as it’s safe and so long as it’s you.

Currently busy scribbling away in his journal he completely misses the sound of the rusty elevator doors creaking open, followed by your footsteps on the dusty lab floor.

You sidle over to him and drape your arms around his shoulders, pressing your head against the side of his throat which causes him to stiffen against your touch.

“Hey.” You smile and Ford immediately relaxes at the sound of your voice, setting his pen down on the table. He brings a hand up to brush the side of your face, stroking your jaw gently with his thumb.

“Hello.” He leans into you, a smile breaking out on his usually stoic face. “What do you need, my dear?”

You hum thoughtfully for a moment, carding your fingers through his messy hair and mussing it further.

“I got some stuff today.” Ford perks up a little at your words, brows raising slightly. “I, uh, wanted to try something new. In the bedroom.”

He turns his chair so that he’s facing you, causing you to stumble a little, but he reaches an arm out to steady you before you can fall. His arm comes to rest around your waist, pulling you gently closer as he looks up at you with big, curious eyes.

“Oh? Color me intrigued.” A small grin appears on his face, awaiting your response. You pull out of his touch and motion for him to follow you, which he does, standing and closing his journal to wander after you.

“I put it upstairs. I hope it’s not too weird.” You give a sheepish smile as the two of you board the elevator, and he places a hand flat on your back to comfort your fears.

“Darling, I’ve seen almost everything in and out of this dimension.” He chuckles, rubbing your back gently. “I highly doubt that it’s too weird.”

You both exit the elevator and you tug him along to your shared bedroom, kicking the door shut behind you and rushing excitedly over to the box sitting on your bed. A soft laugh escapes him as you quickly beckon him over.

“Excited, are we?” He sits down next to you on the bed, looking at the closed box. You nod, flashing a grin and opening the box to rifle through it.

He watches intently as you pull out the few items, tilting his head to the side curiously. You hold up a beautiful deep red and black collar with a matching metal chain leash, almost the same color as his sweater. He blinks a few times, raising an eyebrow and you swear you can hear the cogs turning in his brain.

“I thought it might spice things up a little.” You look away embarrassedly. “I could, uh, wear it.”

“You… want me to treat you like a dog?” He tilts his head adorably, clearly attempting to understand better.

“Essentially.” You nod, and he hums in thought.

“I think I can give it a shot.” He leans closer to press a kiss to your forehead and you give a big, dumb smile.

You lean back to slip the collar on with a satisfying ‘click!’ sound, adjusting it so that it's tight enough but not suffocating you. It presses comfortably against your trachea, with just the right amount of pressure to make you more than a little hot and bothered. You reach back into the box to grab one more item, Ford watching curiously as you pull out a gag.

“I also got this, but we don’t have to use it if you don’t want t-”

“No, wear it.” Stanford cuts you off, almost flustering himself with the quickness of his objection. His face reddens almost immediately, and he clears his throat. “If you’d like to, of course.”

You grin, fidgeting with the harness of the gag in your hands. It’s a beautiful carmine color, with black leather straps accompanying it.

“Should I undress?” You look up at him, and he hums thoughtfully.

“Everything but your underwear,” Stanford responds after a moment, clearly already thinking up a plan. You love that expression he has, when he’s thinking hard about something. When his eyebrows furrow and his eyes cast upwards absently.

Without a second thought, you set the gag down and stand to remove your shirt, pulling it upwards and casting it to the floor. He looks mildly awestruck — as he usually does when you’re undressed — and shamelessly stares at your torso with a dumb grin.

You shyly look away, fidgeting with your pants button awkwardly. He chuckles, scooting to the edge of the bed and reaching out to hold your hips with both hands. All twelve fingers come to rest on your hips, pulling you slightly closer.

“Don’t be so shy, darling.” He purrs, hands running inwards towards your abdomen and unbuttoning your pants with steady movements. “You know I love seeing you.”

A small blush creeps onto your face, accompanied by a flustered smile. He carefully unzips your pants and eases them down your thighs, nudging your legs apart ever so slightly to get them off easier whilst trying not to make you fall over at the same time.

You step out of your now discarded jeans and fidget with your hands, unsure what to do with them. Stanford leans closer and wraps a hand around the shiny metal chain clipped to the collar, pulling your head down roughly - but not painfully - so that you’re face to face with him. You make a sort of yelp noise, stumbling slightly but catching yourself before you can fall.

“Before we do this, I want to ensure your safety.” He says almost matter-of-factly, looking up at you. “If you need to tap out, just give two or three taps anywhere on my body, since you won’t be able to speak. If you’re unable to reach my body, hit the floor, or the bed.”

“Yessir.” You smile and nod, and he relaxes visibly, getting back into the persona of dominance.

“Can I put this on you now?” He reaches to the side to grab the gag, lifting it and holding it in front of your face. You give a shy nod, and he lets go of the chain to wrap the harness around your head with both hands. “Open, sweetheart.”

You realize after a minute that he’s asking you to open your mouth. Almost instantaneously after realizing it, you open your mouth so that your teeth are showing, tongue pressed flat against the bottom to accommodate for the gag. He hums, placing it gently in your mouth and reaching around to buckle it.

“Too tight?” He asks, and you make a muffled sound as if trying to respond before shaking your head. He laughs quietly, placing a hand on top of your head to give a few gentle strokes. “Good. Now, what should I do with you?”

You know it’s a rhetorical question, and he likely already knows what he’s going to do, but that doesn’t stop you from making a small whine.

“Aww,” he cooes, bringing the hand on your head down to your chin to give it a few affectionate scratches, “poor puppy doesn’t know what to do.”

You whine again, embarrassment slowly fading as he gets more into the roleplay. He hums in thought for a moment, toying with the chain dangling from your neck.

“How about this; get on your knees for me.” He doesn’t have to tell you twice. You’re on the floor almost immediately in front of him, knees pressed against the floor while you kneel.

You awkwardly hold your arms to your sides, unsure what to do with them, before Ford takes one and lifts it so that your arm is curled against your chest.

“Paws up, puppy.” Ford commands and you immediately bring your other hand up to match. “Good.”

He pats your head a few times, ruffling your hair while his other hand holds the chain. He gets that thoughtful expression on his face again, this time though, he holds eye contact with you, looking affectionately at you.

“Hmm.. let’s try this. Lay down.” He says after a moment of silence. You blink up at him, registering the command and attempting to execute it.

You scoot back slightly, placing your hands on the floor and laying on your stomach with your legs tucked underneath you. Ford makes an affectionate sound, reaching down to ruffle your hair again.

“Good puppy! Now, let’s try something harder… Roll over.” His voice is sweet and smooth in a way you’ve never heard before - he must be getting really into this.

You shift upwards slightly before ducking your head down, rolling over onto your back and keeping your arms curled up against your chest like a dog. He smiles, getting up off the bed to kneel next to you.

“What a good little pup, so obedient.” He reaches out a hand and places it flat on your belly, giving a couple of affectionate strokes. You arch your back upwards without question, and he chuckles. “Aw, does my puppy like tummy rubs?”

You make a drawn-out whine, looking up at him with pleading eyes. He laughs and inches his hand lower, just barely brushing beneath the waistband of your underwear. You wiggle your hips up into his touch and he draws his hand away, tutting at you.

“Not yet, pup. I have one more trick for you. Then you’ll get a treat.”

You give him a hopeful look, tilting your head to the side and he hums fondly, although his eyes glint with a certain mischief that you just barely miss.

“Beg.” Comes his short command, and you look confused for a second. The gag in your mouth made it impossible to speak, and he snickers at your expression. “C’mon, puppy. Don’t you want that reward?”

You whimper around the gag and he gives an encouraging nod. Realizing he doesn’t want you to beg like a person, you shamelessly begin whining and whimpering, looking up at him with big puppy-dog eyes. When he looks unfazed, you try harder, eyebrows furrowing as you huff and cry as best you can.

“There you go.” Ford grins, grabbing the collar and pulling up slightly. You follow his lead, sitting up and looking at him, waiting ever-so-patiently for that reward.

He leans closer to press a kiss to the crown of your head, running the hand not currently occupied by the chain through the hair on the nape of your neck. He tugs the chain a little bit, standing and sitting on the bed.

“Up.” He pats the bed next to him, and you hop up without a second thought. He suddenly grasps the edges of his sweater, pulling it up and over his head before turning to you. “On your hands and knees.”

You’re too far in to even be embarrassed at this point, willingly getting on your hands and knees in front of him. He grins, slipping off those clunky boots he always insists on wearing and crawling onto the bed behind you.

You startle slightly as his hands grab your hips roughly, pulling you back into him. An outright moan rips through the gag as you feel him pressed against you - he’s completely hard in his slacks.

“Still want that reward?” Stanford asks, rubbing soothing circles into your hips with his thumbs. What a gentleman.

You nod feverishly, grinding your ass back onto his now prominent erection which prompts a hiss from Ford. He nods, hooking his fingers under the waistband of your underwear and all but yanking them down. You yelp quietly, and he laughs, leaning back to shuffle out of his pants and boxers.

“So wet. You really like this, huh puppy?” He palms your ass, spreading you apart for him, before running his thumb down the slit of your cunt. You jolt, whining pathetically around the gag and pushing your hips back into his hand.

He growls a little, a deep, primal sound that you’ve heard at least a hundred times at this point. You can’t see it, but he’s got a huge, almost feral, grin on his face.

The head of his cock bumps your entrance and you hiss, whining and clawing at the sheets as your front half collapses onto the bed, leaving you face down ass up for him. His grip on your hips is almost bruising as he eases his cock into you, a low groan forcing itself from his lungs.

“Fuck, you’re tight.” He growls through his teeth, self-restraint a thread away from breaking as his hips meet yours. You make a whiny gasp, feeling as though the air was just knocked from your chest.

He gives you the comfort of waiting for you to adjust, but his hands shake a little on your hips, obviously impatient.

“Ready, pup?” He asks through gritted teeth, the same feral grin splitting his face. You nod after a minute, clawing the sheets and pressing your hips back.

He reaches down to grab the chain, pulling it around your neck so that it’s facing him. You shudder a little at the movement, and, just as a precaution, Stanford leans down to ask a question before he starts moving.

“Remember the safe wor- err, action?” He massages your hip gently, referring to the earlier conversation and making sure you know you can back out if it gets too much.

You nod, pressing your hips back into his. He groans and draws his hips back slightly, snapping them suddenly forward and fucking a moan that’s downright pornographic out of you. One hand rests on your hip, the other white knuckle gripping the chain around your throat and pulling it gently with every thrust.

He fucks you like he’ll die if he stops, hips moving with a rhythm that should be impossible for his age, but you figure 30 years of dimension-hopping will make you at least a little more athletic. You can barely form a sentence at this rate, his cock pumping deep, ferocious stokes inside of you that make you feel dizzy.

The tip of his cock jams into a sweet spot and you see stars, crying out and clenching hard around him.

“Fuck-!” Stanford’s grip on your hips tightens, and he leans down to growl in your ear. “Right there, pup? Yeah?”

You make a whiny noise of confirmation and he laughs, angling his hips to keep hitting that spot. You’re not gonna last long at this point, and you know he’s not going to either.

It’s hard to warn someone you’re about to cum with silicone stuffed in your mouth, but you try anyways, whines getting louder and more desperate, and he seems to understand. He somehow fucks into you impossibly faster, reaching his own release along with you.

“Can I, fuck- can I cum inside of you?” His voice is almost akin to a plea, and are you to deny him such a request? He did ask nicely, after all.

You nod your head again, emphasizing with a muffled whimper. His eyes screw shut and his head tilts back as he thrusts a few more times, stilling suddenly as he reaches his peak, stuffing your cunt full of hot cum and making a noise that sounds straight out of a porno.

You cry out and gasp, shaking and clenching around him as he haphazardly fucks you through your orgasm, making sure you reach it too. It’s like fireworks go off inside your brain and you’re certain you’ve never cum this hard before, pleasure sparking up your spine as the coil in your belly finally snaps.

You both take a good while to come down, panting and shaking a little as he rubs gently up and down your back. He pulls out eventually, making you whimper softly from the overstimulation.

He sits next to you as you lifelessly flop over onto the bed, hands still twitching from the intensity of your orgasm. He reaches over to remove the gag, unhooking the buckle and pulling it out of your mouth.

“Bleeugh,” a thick line of saliva drips from your mouth and onto the bed, “…sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize.” Stanford chuckles, placing the gag down on the nightstand after wiping it off with a tissue. “We can wash the sheets later.”

He rolls over and pulls you into his arms, throwing the blanket over you both and reaching over to unbuckle the collar so that you don’t suffocate in your sleep. He puts that on the nightstand as well, before cuddling up to you and pulling you into his chest.

“I’m glad you enjoyed yourself, dear.” He smiles, carding a hand through your hair. “I enjoyed myself as well, although I’m fairly certain my back will be sore for a while.”

“Thank you for indulging me.” You laugh, snuggling into him.

“Anything for you, my dearest.”

It doesn’t take long for you both to drift off, the night's events being entirely exhausting for both of you, and you’re both sure you discovered something new about yourselves.

Thank you as always for reading, and i hope you enjoyed <3

[roneloren]

My first fanfic on Tumblr)

Earlier in the morning. Vladimir lazily opened his eyes, into which the bright rays of the morning sun brazenly climbed. Birds were singing outside the window. Only now did he realize that he had forgotten to close the window and curtains in his room in the evening, he was so tired after staying up late playing cards with Andrey yesterday. He's probably still sleeping like a dead bear in the next room on the couch, wrapped up to his nose in a scratchy but very warm blanket. Vladimir lazily got up from the slightly creaking bed and casually threw a dark blue bathrobe, abandoned last night, or rather already in the dead of night, which both proudly dubbed "the lingering twilight," onto the nearest chair. Slowly tying his belt as if there was no one else in the apartment besides the owner himself, Makarov left his room and suddenly heard a pleasant, quiet piano playing. Once again noting in his head how good the soundproofing in Stalinki was, Vladimir pondered the source of the music for a while. My first thought was that Andrey's phone had rung. An interesting choice of melody. In general, the brunette thought that his right hand on the ringtone would have something like heavy metal or, conversely, country music like the songs of the band Dropkick Murphys, in whose T-shirts Andrei often appeared in everyday life. By the way, he was wearing it that night too...Looking up, Makarov opened his eyes wide in surprise. Nolan was playing an old piano that stood in the corner of the living room, where the redhead was staying the night. It was impossible to even really understand what exactly Vladimir was in such shock about. From the fact that this junk, which no one had touched for twenty years, could be played normally, and even very beautifully, or from the fact that Andrei knew how to handle a musical instrument... Especially like this... Delicate and quite fragile... Behind which you expect to see anyone, but not a huge military closet, which almost always walks with a frown and instills fear at first glance into those flaming blue eyes. He could be imagined with anything but a musical instrument... Yes, he knew firsthand about Andrey's dexterity of fingers. Vladimir has seen many times how his deputy can disassemble a machine gun almost to the cogs in a matter of seconds and also assemble it back in a split second. And he also knows how to do it very well...one false note broke out of his thoughts.

—Damn it... La is upset...

Andrey swore softly, continuing to play. It was noticeable that the composition was coming to its climax. The melody gets faster and the notes get higher. Vladimir froze, leaning against the wall and listening to the music. He studied the pianist carefully. There was something wrong with him, something seemed to be missing, but it seemed that it was even more beautiful... But looking at the same level for a minute now, he can't figure out what exactly is confusing him in this whole picture. This level was Andrey's neck. It was only a minute later that Vladimir realized what exactly had caught his attention in this painting... A bandana. Or a collar. Or the kind of scarf that was always around the neck of an Australian. That's what was missing. Brown-eyed only now realized that... I've never even seen Andrey's neck... She was always hidden by collars, high hoods, scarves, or in warm places with an ordinary bandana. But this time the skin was bare, and what covered the neck last night was lying on the coffee table by the sofa, carefully and carefully folded into a triangle, which contrasted vividly with the slippers carelessly thrown by the aforementioned piece of furniture. Vladimir was mesmerized by the seemingly ordinary part of the body, listening to music and could not believe his ears and eyes... He had never expected to see this side of his deputy... It seemed that in this setting and with the bright morning rays, even Andrey's hair seemed bright, red as a spark... Or was it because he hadn't combed his hair, and because of that, his hair wasn't in its usual neat mohawk, but rather slightly disheveled, which made it look lighter? The question is rhetorical...Neither of them noticed how smoothly the melody ended. Andrey's fingers smoothly outlined the contours of the keys, where they ended their long, tireless run and gently lay on the redhead's lap. For about a minute, Makarov and Nolan were in complete silence, without saying a word. Only the singing of birds outside the boldly open window and the soft rustle of curtains from the rare gusts of a gentle warm breeze that played not only with the curtains, but also with Andrei's red curls, slightly disturbed the silence. It seemed that the men could hear each other's pulse and breathing, it became so quiet. None of them had heard true silence for a long time. They were both used to hearing the sounds of explosions, gunfire, and ringing in their ears all the time... But not silence. She was like a curiosity from children's fairy tales, the importance of which everyone talks about, but no one really felt it. The silence seemed to hang in the air along with thousands of small specks of dust. You could almost touch her with your hands, bury yourself in a warm blanket... She was interrupted first by Andrey, whose ear tips were slightly reddened from such close attention to himself.

— What do you think, Volodya...?

Andrey spoke at the same time curiously and reverently. Vladimir gently exhaled the air he was holding in his chest, not daring to make even the faintest sound while Nolan was playing. Makarov has always loved music... And now he has, so to speak, a hand musician... Perhaps he will take advantage of this gift of fate. It's a sin to let such a thing pass by the soul, right?

— Excellent, Andreika... Excellent... Will you play something else?

He came closer to Andrey and lightly ruffled his red curls. He twitched reflexively, but stopped, hesitantly tilting his head towards the commander's hand. No one except Andrey was given the privilege of seeing Makarov like this... Relaxed, feeling his warmth, which was hidden from everyone by hundreds and thousands of locks. And Andrey got the key to all these doors...

— Yes, Volodya... I'll play...

fingers touched the keys again

[artobotsrollout]

The fact that, by Megatron standards, a lot of Starscream’s backstabbing ways has been ‘let go’ go despite the amount of plotting he’s done and added on top of that how easily Megtron is willing to let a decepticon die at the drop of a hat and yet he lives really drives home to me the narrative that , as Fowler said, “Starscream’s unpredictability makes him arguably even more dangerous than Megatron.”

Like yeah he’s shown fecking up a lot in the show but the more i think about it, the fact he’s survived and also done as much as he has with so many, and sometimes even all, the cards stacked against him really is a testament to how clever the shitweasel is and how he can think and manipulate others quick on his feet.

And without spoiling things, nearing the end of season 2, the fact Megatron chose Starscream over another option tells me that Starscream is a lot more competent than he’s given credit for.

People underestimate him and he uses that to his advantage. But he’s retained second in command position for a long ass time and was a commander of seekers and out of the whole show he’s like... the only one who’s gotten anything permanently done on the con’s side so far.

Legit seems like he’s seriously dangerous when 2 conditions are met.

1. He’s not panicking and/or having his plans/reservations of a sitation ignored. Basically if he was able to have his judgement trusted (and yknow under the condition he was n’t trying to overthrow someone or was in a leadership position already.)

2. He’s not letting his preening get in the way. Megatron is guilty of letting his ego control him too the main difference to me why his team doesn’t see it as easily is Megatron has the physical presence to where his inability to reign in his ego and anger is seen as ‘ruthless’ and ‘intimidating’ whereas for Starscream where he doesn’t have the physical strength and presence he relies on wit and strategy (which is a far more respectable leadership trait might I say) he can’t quite fall back on the ‘if there’s a problem punch it harder’ method that Megatron does again and again. His failings seem so much worse as a result but arguably Megatron has fecked up so goddamn much worse and is so focused on escalating and quick victory instead of the bigger picture and just loves blaming his team for his own poor judgement.

Knockout: Uh Megatron maybe don’t stab the ship with dark energon when we know exactly jack-all about what it will do?

Megatron: You’re not my real dad *stabs ship*

Things: *Go terribly wrong*

Megatron: Ah yes time to yell at Knockout.

Somehow this turned into a TED talk that has 100% been said better a million times before I even joined the TFP scene of why Starscream could be an absolutely devastating leader of the decepticons if he wasn’t constantly backed into a corner, abused /in constant fear of Megs, and doubted/underestimated by his own team around every turn. (And if not for his own constant ego and shitweaselness of course. He’s still a major shitweasel it’s why I love him. He’s just a shitweasel with deadly potential. Like a ferret with a bazooka who is getting too excited about bragging about owning a bazooka and how much money it can get from selling said bazooka instead of the bazooka’s deadly potential if it waited for the perfect opportunity and knew how to use it properly.)

(Edit: Oh my god Starscream's excited little noise when Megatron said he would resume command in his absence was adorable djeheh. Megs 100% knows Starscream is a cunning fecker. He just can't let the team think he's more cunning and clever than himself. How sinister a way of maintaining leadership by keeping a smart asset and a good possible leader close but undermining him enough so no one else can see his potential.)

[parvulous-writings]

Karl Heisenberg // SFW alphabet

Request: So there was no actual request, I just knew this would cheer up my closest friend. 

Dedicated to: @rey-is-not-a-skywalker

Summary: A sfw A-Z for Karl Heisenberg, from Resident Evil Village!

Warnings: Explicit language

Notes: Please, have some Soft!Heisenberg, bor. It’s one of the many, many things you deserve.  To those who have requested oneshots- I am working on them, please be patient! My requests are currently open! My pinned post (found here) contains both a list of characters I write for, and a masterlist!

Not my gif

A - Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?) 

He’s never affectionate publicly. Behind closed doors, though- well maybe he’s not your stereotypical lovey-dovey type, but hey-ho, he shows it in his own little way. A few hugs, but mostly through making you things. Music boxes, little figures and robots that wind up, you name it, he’ll try and make it. 

B - Best Friend (What would they be like as a best friend? Where does the friendship start?)

He’s not a friendly man, typically. He’s cold, and driven only by his motives. It takes a long time for him to warm up to you, but when he eventually does he is always by your side, whenever you should need him. Be it for violence, or for an ear to pour your thoughts into- even though half the time you swear he’s not listening completely. 

C - Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Heisenberg likes warm cuddles above all others. The kind where he can pull you close and hold you there for a while- he likes feeling you against his chest. It’s comforting to him, after years of no affection and a torturous living experience. 

D - Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking, cleaning, ect?)

Karl is not particularly skilled in any domestic skill. He’s very mediocre at cooking, and he can’t clean to save his life- his factory is littered with dust and other probably very harmful particles. He isn’t very good in a domestic environment at all, really. 

E - Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Blunter than a broken pencil I’m afraid. He’s never had to hide something from you in the past, so why should this be any different? He would not want to beat around the bush here, he’d annoy himself with pleasantries and euphemisms. 

F - Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? Do they wanna get married?)

He’s perfectly fine staying as partners, without marriage looming over the pair of you. Quite frankly, he doesn’t think it’s worth it.  “A piece of damn paper to show someone your fucking devotion? Bullshit.” 

G - Gentle (How gentle are they both physically and emotionally?)

Unless you’re shaking like a leaf or have specifically asked him to be gentle with or around you, he’s not going to be. He’ll treat you much how he treats most others- with a little bit of affection for zest and flavour every now and then. 

H - Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it, and what are they like?)

While he likes cuddles, he isn’t a huge fan of hugs. He thinks they’re too short to show any real affection, and often get in the way of whatever task the recipient is trying to perform.  

I - I Love You (How fast do they say the “love” word?)

S l o w l y. This man has gone through some stuff, and doesn’t want to get attached to people despite falling for you. Give him a chance. 

J - Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What are they like when jealous?)

Okay so he may be “non-committal” in a loose sense of the term, but this man is one jealous motherfucker. And he gets angry. I’m talking  punching the wall, lashing out and breaking shit kind of angry. It’s mostly because of a nagging fear that not only will he lose you to someone you think is better or less monstrous than he is, but also in part due to a feeling that because of what he was forced to become, he isn’t good enough to keep you for himself. 

K - Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

He kisses you on your hands or neck mostly. Those are his favourite places to kiss you. He occasionally kisses you on the inside of your wrist. If you have any scars as well, he’ll kiss them. 

L - Little Ones (How are they around kids?)

It depends. Sometimes he’s the perfect uncle figure, others he’s a whirlwind of rage. If you’re taking him to see some children for a prolonged amount of time, please check how he’s acting and feeling on the day so there isn’t some sort of horrific accident. 

M - Morning (What are mornings like with them?)

There’s nothing special about them, he’s usually up long before you are. He doesn’t leave anything like a hot beverage behind, unless it’s a special occasion that he’s remembered- like a birthday or anniversary. 

N - Nights (How are nights spent with them?)

He often tells you to go to bed before him, as he’s usually working on something, and would rather not have to worry about you being down in his factory and workshop. 

O - Open (When do they open up about themselves?)

When he’s extremely angry. He gets riled up, then will start to spill facts and secrets while hardly even realising it. 

P - Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He has a very short fuse and a violent temper, to say the least. There’s a reason the man swears so much. Though he will often apologise if he’s scared you after an outburst. 

Q - Quizzes (How much do they remember about you?)

He remembers the basic things at the very least- Your name, your habits on eating and drinking, what you do to amuse yourself. He’s quite observant, actually. 

R - Remember (Favorite memory with you?)

He made you a small music box once. The past part of his day, or his entire week, was seeing your smile as you opened it and listened to it for the first time. It was the widest he’d ever seen you smile, and he loved the feeling it gave him. 

S - Security (How protective are they?)

Very. One particular other Lord- “Lady Super-Sized Bitch,” as Heisenberg has dubbed her- is very interested in your presence, and Heisenberg has made it very much his business to keep you practically under lock and key to keep you safe. And when Ethan Winters comes around? Ooh, boy. You ain’t leaving his sight. 

T - Try (How much effort do they put in?)

He does try- through making trinkets and gadgets to both help you and show his affection. Sometimes it may not always seem that way though, with his outbursts and his tantrums. 

U - Ugly (What are their bad habits?)

He smokes. You tried to get him to quit once, then stopped when you realised it made him more irritable. 

V - Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He’s not that concerned. If he’s still kicking... Well that’s all that matters to him. 

W - Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He’d feel that something’s wrong, something’s not right- a cog missing from a machine, in a sense. And he hates that feeling. 

X - Xtra (Random HC)

This man would die for some ice-cream. You bring him a tub of the stuff- BAM, instant good mood for the next like two days. 

Y - Yuck (Things they don’t like either in general or a partner?)

This man is not fussy, in the slightest. 

Z - Zzz (Sleep habits)

He basically doesn’t, he gets so little it’s a wonder he can actually function normally. 

[hockeyforthefirsttime]

Home For Christmas- Mat Barzal

AN: This is no shame, I started this before Christmas with the intention of finishing it as well... bitch I didn’t, so here we are.

Word count: 4k

TW: bad parenting, mentions of cheating, kind of angst? idk 

Sitting alone by the kitchen table, you watch the snow fall heavy over the town. You’re supposed to be working on your masters thesis, but your mind is a thousand miles away, 2 185,4 miles to be exact. 

And even that far away, Mat is still everywhere to be seen in a town he’s never been in. He’s in the cafe with the really bad coffee and the really good cakes, he’s in the window reflection in the old thrift shop you used to go to when you were younger. And you can imagine him so easily outside on the front porch, playing in the snow. 

In all honesty that would be ideal, having him here. But he’s not, he didn’t have the opportunity to come. You understand that. You understand that he’s got his own traditions, family and friends to see. 

But when you left JFK to come to the cabin in Alta, you wished that he was by your side, you by his. Instead of the snoring man that sat on your right hand side the entire flight. At least you got the window seat. 

Your parents went out to have dinner or visit some friends, you don’t care enough to remember. 

All you could think of was how Mat had been babbling about how excited he was for Christmas, and going home. And how you deep inside dreaded coming here. It’s not that your parents don’t love you, they just love the idea of the past you. Mat cares for you a lot, you know that, you’ve settled for that. But you haven’t had the heart to tell him how your parents only care for perfect facades and flaunting their riches. That's also why you haven’t told them about Mat. 

The snow is still falling over the perfectly decorated front lawn. 

You’re still thinking of Mat and how he would look with rosy cheeks from the cold, when your parents move in through the front door whilst talking in low murmurs. 

“Y/N, darling? You’re still awake?” 

Your mother asks, not yelling though, never yelling. She waits until she can see you from the hallway. 

“Yes, still kind of working.”

You answer politely. 

“Oh, you’re still writing your thesis?” 

Quickly as she comes around the table, you switch from the spotify tab, to the uni home page.The lie comes smoothly and she doesn’t notice, she never does. 

“My little hard worker, you’re gonna be such a good psychiatrist one day.” 

And your heart sinks all the way down to your stomach. You’ve never told them that you switched majors three years ago. Or that you’re not writing a dissection of the human mind, but rather a song. As well as a thesis. 

“Hey, I’m gonna go to my room.” 

Your mom nods at you with what almost resembled a fond smile. Passing your father in the hallway you see him slip something into the pocket of his already hung coat. 

“Night sweetheart.” 

“Night dad” 

You smile half heartedly while balancing your books and laptop in your hands. 

No matter how nicely the property is decorated, no matter how hard you try, you’ll never be what your parents expect you to be. They are much like their cabin in your opinion, pretty and inviting on the outside, shallow on the inside. 

You don’t know how to handle this. Because while you grew up a lot around here, New York feels like your home now. With pictures on the walls and tiny memories littered around the place. The bedroom you’ve always had in the cabin hasn’t changed much since you last were here. Pictures of people you no longer talk to still hang on the vanity you never used. 

Crawling underneath the thick duvet, you pull your phone off the charger on your nightstand. There are a few messages on snap chat and instagram you’ve missed. Mostly friends from college, all in their respective homes with their old friends and family. 

You close both of the apps, and sigh when you see the wallpaper of your phone. It’s a picture of you and Mat. You’re dressed in a hoodie with his jersey over it and his arms slung around your middle from behind, the both of you smiling at Beau behind the camera. You remember that day. 

It was in the early days of your relationship and only the second or third game you had been too of his. The Islanders had played the Rangers and won, Mat scored twice and it was overall a good game. The WAG’s had all started to head for the locker room hallway, while you set your path for the exit, planning on meeting Mat back at his apartment. Lauren was the first to see you trying to sneak out. And had instantly called you out on it. She’s a miracle worker with people, and within seconds she had figured out how scared you were that Mat wouldn’t want you there. After all this was a team win, and you didn’t quite feel like you were a part of the team. Not yet at least. 

And despite your fears, Lauren convinced you that he would love to see you first thing as he exited. And he had been. His already beaming face had swept you up in his strong arms and spun you around. Mat truly was and still is at times more excitable than a puppy.

-----

You wake up abruptly from someone yelling. That someone you quickly recognize as your father's voice. And your heart drops, even though the words are muffled, you can imagine the scene. Your mother, sitting at the kitchen table, in the same spot as you sat last night, telling him to calm down and stop yelling. Your father pacing in front of her, screaming about something you can’t quite figure out what is yet. He is obviously ignoring her.

Picking your phone up from the mattress as you sit up, there doesn’t seem to be anything new. You enter the messages app and shoot Mat a message, telling him to call you in thirty minutes. 

With a sigh, you pull the warm, comfortable duvet off yourself and drag your body out of the bed. Everything in the room seems a little colder, and you know it’s probably because of the badly isolated windows. That’s probably why the cool floorboards tickle your feet when you step on them. Luckily there is a pair of thick socks on the floor next to the bed, so you pull them on and walk to the door. 

Carefully you let the door creep open silently. 

“- and why couldn’t you just leave it be?” 

You hear your father yelling. 

“Because you’re my husband and I love you, you’re not supposed to have a second phone, much less a second girlfriend.” 

Immediately your stomach sinks. Your dad has a mistress? Then it was probably the second phone he slipped into the coat pocket last night. God, christmas spirit, eh? You shut the fight out of your mind instantly, not wanting this to be your christmas. In this moment you hate all the bad hallmark movies you’ve watched with Mat. Not for having watched them, but for letting them give you hope of a normal christmas.

On autopilot, you start packing the bag you never finished unpacking. It takes fifteen minutes for you to finish. Your phone starts ringing as soon as you zip the back shut. With a deep sigh you answer the phone. 

“Hi Mat.” 

“Hey, babe. You okay?” 

You can hear laughter in the background and the smile in his voice. You hate yourself for the next words. 

“No, not really.” 

The admittance lies heavy in your chest, but some of the weight seems to lift off when you speak the feelings into existence. 

“I’m sorry, is there anything I can do?” 

It's like the world disappears for a minute, and just hearing his voice calms you down. 

“No, I don’t think so, I just don’t think I can handle this right now. ‘M just gonna head home to my apartment. I can’t take my parents right now.”

It’s a relief to get the words out of your mouth and into existence. You can imagine him right now, with the cute frown on his face and the cogs and wheels in his brain turning.

“Hold on, you’re not gonna spend christmas morning alone are you?” 

“Why not? It’s not really different from what I’m used to, and it’s already the 23rd today anyway.” 

“That gives you just enough time to fly here!” 

 Your heart soars at the thought of waking up with Mat in his childhood home, but reason strikes you seconds later. 

“Mathew, I’m not gonna intrude on your family like that.” 

The sigh he releases on the other end of the phone, is followed by a small chuckle. 

“You’re not intruding. I promise. Plus they all love you.” 

------

You order an uber straight after calling Mathew. When you open the door to your bedroom, the yelling still hasn’t stopped. The log walls have always been pretty soundproof, but you swear, right now there is an echo in the house. Silently you close the door behind you. Your dad is still ranting on about how none of this is his fault, and how some things women simply don’t understand. 

You sigh and take off your shoes to make your steps even quieter than usual.It’s not that your father isn’t kind, it’s just that he seems to have been too kind to another woman. And it puts a great deal of fear into your heart. It makes you scared that Mat might do the same. 

You shake the thought (almost) out of your head, Mat is not your father, and you are not your mother. Still, you can’t help but feel like your mother deserves better. Leaning against the door frame, you pull up your phone and start scouring the web. 

The uber app alerts you of your rides arrival, and you go into your travel backpack and pull out a piece of paper and a pen. Quickly you write down the number and name of both a divorce lawyer and a couples therapist. Your coat is already on and your bag doesn't have wheels, so it’s a silent endeavour to the other bedroom in use on this floor. Your parent’s room. 

It looks like it always has. Everything is neatly put behind closed doors and the bed is perfectly made. No knick knacks on the bedside table, not even a book or an alarm clock. You sigh, put the note on your mothers side of the bed and leave.

You’re glad the kitchen doesn ‘t have a clear view of the hallway, your parents are too immersed in their fight, to notice the fact that their child is slipping through their fingers. They don’t notice you walking away from them.

------

The airport is not so surprisingly filled only with stragglers and people who are most likely working this christmas. The pine trees are decorated and everywhere, but you don’t feel as sick to your stomach as you usually do. Quickly you find your gate. It’s got a great view and you watch the snow fall under the lights of the airport and sip the holiday drink you uncharacteristically got from the coffee shop beside the gate. You have already checked in the luggage, so yet again you pull out a pen, but also a worn and torn leather bound notebook that’s been with you since the start of your degree. 

The songs usually come from poems but somehow this one is different. You start the melody quickly, writing down notes and sometimes little words that you feel make sense with the melody. Your hands start to itch for the ivory and ebony keys of a piano, but just as the feeling arrives the flight attendant calls up your flight and you have to pack up. 

 The plane is only half full, so you get a row to yourself. Resting your feet across the two free seats is a little uncomfortable, you’ll admit as much, but the feeling of having the piano at least on your computer is settling some of the itch. 

-----

Mat comes alone to pick you up from the airport. He’s standing in the parking lot leaning against his car. The second he hears you approaching he looks up from his phone, pockets it and meets you halfway. Immediately he hugs you tight.

“Hi babe, I missed you.” 

He says with a low voice into the scarf wrapped around your neck. You just hug him tighter. The tension that took a hold of your body during the layover, is releasing from your body. Mat’s entire being is like a weighted blanket covering you. 

When he lets you go, you miss his warmth, but it’s short lived. He picks up the bag you dropped to the snow covered ground and puts in the trunk before opening the passenger door for you. Upon entering the car, you are engulfed in everything Mat and warmth. 

“You gonna tell me what’s going on with your family?”

You sigh at the question, knowing it was going to come sooner or later. To be honest you’re glad he asked now, and not back home, back with his family. It’s just, how do you explain the entire messy situation to Mat, without getting pity points? You don’t want to feel like some charity case or, even worse, like some spoilt child who can’t handle the situation.

Instead of dwelling over it for too long, you decide to jump into it as he starts the car and enters the freeway. 

“My dad is cheating on my mom, and she found out last night. I think they were up the entire night just arguing. I just left a note on mom’s bed with the number of both a divorce lawyer as well as a couples therapist.”

You rant off, state it matter of factly. Trying to shut off your emotions. 

“Are you okay Y/N?” 

Mat asks. Simple as that. He asks you if you’re okay, and you can’t quite handle it. The tears are pressing on behind your eyes. And you look out the window, trying to hold them back. But when he puts a hand on your thigh, you let the first tear fall. 

“No.” 

And it really is as simple as that. You’re not okay. And you hate it. Just in that second your phone starts ringing in your back pocket.

“Sorry.”  

You say as Mat looks at you. He just gives you a soft smile. You check the caller id, and see it’s your mom. Quickly you clear your throat and wipe your tears away. 

“Hello mom.” 

You answer, trying to sound neutral. 

“Y/N, where are you? Did you go to one of your friends here? I can’t find any of your things.” 

She sounds confused to be honest. 

“Yeah no, I left, I’m on my way to my boyfriend’s house.” 

You hear her suck in a breath. Probably trying to calm down. You do the same, hoping for a calm conversation. 

“You didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend? Where are you?” 

You sigh, know it’s gonna be a long conversation. 

“No, I know, I didn’t tell you on purpose. He lives in New York usually, but he’s from Canada.” 

Ideally, you know, this would be a conversation to have with Mat, about why you haven’t told them about him, before you had it with your mother. 

“You’re in Canada?” 

“Yes.” 

“Well, what does he do then?” 

“Mom..” 

You start to avoid the question, but she interrupts you. 

“No, I want to know what he does that makes you think it’s okay for you to run away from your family right before christmas.”

In that second, just a split second, you get a little fight in you. 

“First of all, it wasn’t his call, he invited me, when I called him. Originally I was just gonna go back to New York. Alone. Second of all, I am not interested in spending christmas around you and dad when you can’t figure out your lives. Third of all, he makes me feel safe and appreciated and I can’t imagine being anywhere else right now.” 

You can feel the tears streaming down your face, but you don’t care. 

“Fine, if you are going to be like that then.” 

“I am gonna be like this mom.” 

“Fine.” 

She says, and then she hangs up the phone. And to be honest you’re kind of glad she did. 

“That sounded rough.” 

You nod and close your eyes. You don’t want things to be this way. You truly don’t, but it the way it is. 

“You didn’t tell them about me?” 

Mat asks. Possibly sounding hurt. 

“No, I was scared that they were gonna be who I know them to be, especially upon finding out that you play hockey for a living.”

He sinks a bit back in the driver’s seat.

“You think they wouldn’t like me?” 

He definitely sounds hurt. 

“I think they would like your image, your paycheck and what you could do for them publicly.”  

You answer earnestly. Before continuing. 

“They want a solid paycheck and all the nice things in life. The things that prove that they’ve got a lot of money, and that about sums it up.” 

“Oh, well that’s not good.” 

Letting out a sad chuckle, you nod your head. You can tell you’re closing up on his house because he seems to be driving slower now.

“I hope you know I’m not into you for the paychecks.” 

“No I know-”  

He turns and smiles at you. 

“You’re in this, for the amazing sex, eh?”

“Oh, for sure.”  

You smile and take his hand.

---

Waking up is always kind of heavier in the winter, but with Mat’s arms wrapped around you in the morning, it’s just something else. You fell asleep in one of his hoodies and flannel pj pants. You’ll admit it, it is a bit too warm, but hell it’s so worth it. 

You can feel him behind you, bare chest rising slow and steady. Soft snores escape him every now and then, but his arm around your waist stays there. Mindlessly, you start tracing shapes and letters on the back of his hand. You feel his hand start twitching, and all of a sudden he squeezes you tight and pulls you on top of himself. 

“I love you too.” 

He smiles up at you with his bleary eyes. Your cheeks heat up. You didn’t think he’d actually notice the letters you had been spelling out on his hand. So you hide your face on his shoulder and stay there. Just placing small, light kisses there. 

“Can you say it? Like out loud?” 

He asks you, quietly. 

“That I love you?” 

Immediately you feel him smile into your hair. 

“I love you Mat Barzal.” 

And you swear, you can feel his heart skip a beat in his chest.  

“Merry Christmas, by the way.” 

You say, feeling content. This is by far the best Christmas morning you’ve had, and you haven’t even gotten out of bed. 

“Oh shit, it’s Christmas morning!”

And before you know it, the light is on, and he’s out of bed and pulling on a shirt and a pair of sweats. He turns and looks at you expectantly. 

“Well, aren’t you coming?” 

He asks, moving in your direction. Mat all but drags you out of the bed and barely let’s you go to the bathroom to brush your teeth, before meeting his family downstairs. And it’s a glorious sight that meets your eyes. The christmas tree is decorated with little lights and different colour baubles?, as well as glitter. It looks homemade, and not like the perfectly decorated trees that have made their mark on your childhood. 

The sight of it causes you to stop dead in your tracks. God, how you love the normalcy of this. The morning is filled with laughter, jokes and copious amounts of hot chocolate. It’s not until the end of the gift unwrapping, that Mat slips away from you, claiming that he has to go to the toilet. 

He returns a few minutes later, carrying a big box wrapped in paper. It doesn’t take you long to notice that all eyes are on you. 

“Maty, I told you no gifts.”

You sigh, but you can’t help the smile that creeps onto your lips as you see how giddy he is. 

“I know I know, and originally I was going to stick to it, but I saw this in the store and I know you said you’d manage without it, but I just couldn’t help myself.” 

And as you listen to him rant his heart out to you, realization dawns on you. 

“You didn’t seriously..” 

Your sentence trails off as you watch him carefully place the box down on the dinner table. 

“Please, just open it?” 

And he knows you could never resist his pleading, just as well as you do. Nodding, you head to the table and start unwrapping the way too expensive gift. Soon the logo of the electric keyboard begins to unravel to you, and tears are seriously prickling behind your eyes.You pull the sleeves of the hoodie over your hands and wipe the tears away.

“Mathew, this is seriously the best christmas gift I have ever gotten.”

You mumble. He comes over and wraps you up in his arms again, and you can feel him smiling, how his entire being is happy, and maybe a little proud of himself. His mom and dad gush over how cute the two of you are, whilst Liana rolls her eyes with a fond smile. 

“Well, why don’t you play us something sweetie?” 

Mats mother asks you carefully once you unwrap yourself from Mat. 

“Yeah, I can do that.” 

And just like that the living room is cleared enough for you to set up the keyboard along with a chair from the kitchen. You even go back upstairs and find the chords you have written down for the song you wrote in the airport.

Testingly, you play a few chords. That is the moment you notice how quiet they’ve all gotten, so you decide to speak up, just to shake the nerves a little. 

“Okay, so this is kind of a rushed song, I wrote it on my way here, but I do hope you like it.” 

And then you start playing the first notes. You do love how the keys seem to find their way to you right away, like you’ve been playing this keyboard for a long time already. And then the words spill from your mouth. And you just sing. 

Careful what you say

This time of year

Tends to weaken me

And have a little decency

And let me cry in peace

But there's a place where I

Erase the challenges I've been through

Where he knows every corner

Every street-name

All by heart

And so it is a part of my

Courageous plan to leave

With a broken heart

Tucked away under my sleeve

I wanna find home for Christmas

Let me find home this year

I wanna find home for Christmas

Let me find home this year

I'll pack my bags

And leave before the sun rises tomorrow

'Cause we act more like strangers for each day

That I am here

But I have someone close to me

Who never will desert me

Who remind me frequently

What I I can truly be 

And so it is a part of my

Courageous plan to leave

With a broken heart

Tucked away under my sleeve

I wanna find home this Christmas

Let me find home this year

I wanna find home this Christmas

Let me find home this year

I don't know what my future holds

But I know who will love me

I can’t tell you where I'm from

But this one loved me to life

And so it is a part of my

Courageous plan to leave

With a broken heart

Tucked away under my sleeve

I wanna find home this Christmas

Let me find home this year

I wanna find home this Christmas

Let me find home this year

Playing the finishing keys, you look up from the keys, and see both Liana and Nadia smiling through a few tears. Mike is holding his wife close as he smiles at you. But Mat, he looks at you like you hung the stars in the night sky. 

Quickly you get up from the chair and wrap your arms around his neck. Closing your eyes, just letting yourself be completely enveloped in him. 

For a second though, he pulls slightly away, just enough so he can look you in the eyes. 

“I love you so much, and you’ll always have a home with me.”

Your heart swells ten times bigger than what your chest is made to encompass. 

“I know. I love you too.”

[my-crazy-crazy-mind]

I'm not good at writing but I made this so here.if you have any feed back at all let me know or requests or anything I like to talk.Ill do requests for any male wrestler any links ect. Within reson no fluid play ect.

Rating:Mature only read if you are 18 or older:

Braun Strowman & Reader

His world

Trixie8923

Summary:

Your a low level worker in the wwe.You are nothing just a cog in the machine until a run in makes you more.

18+ only

Notes:

I take any WWE requests of any kind and will do my best to complete them. This story is complete. I am working on a sequel to this story. Thank you for reading if you have any suggestions or comments please let me know anything polite is welcome. Finished may make a follow up for the story but not sure. Not good at spell check ect if your intrested in editing for me let me know.

Chapter Management

Edit Chapter

Chapter 1

Chapter Text

You were nothing in the world of World Wrestling Entertainment or better known as WWE.

Just a catering aid your job was mainly to arrive before everyone with the rest of catering services put everything out then make sure everyone is happy whether its putting plates together for the superstars making their coffees etc.

If you do say so your self you were damn good at it you should be in a month it would three years since you joined WWE. Most of the superstars are nice to you of course there are some that aren't nice to anyone you just try to stay away from them and be professional.

You were lucky tho you made friends with Becky Lynch through her you were friends with Seth and the other girls were always friendly with you. It was Monday night Raw and you were taking one of your breaks talking to Becky. "Becks your crazy I know I'm trained to be a wrestler but I'm just not cut out for it I'm just happy to be near the business. Becky sighs" you always say that " yn" but I've trained with you and saw you wrestle your good you should go to a try out surprise everyone".You shake your head" when would I find the time I have a job to do Becks.

Suddenly you are lifted into the air and come face to face with a mad Bobby Lashley his low voice rumbles in your ear" I want my coffee the way you make it now "he sets you hard in front of the coffee table.

Becky stands up" hey what's the idea shes on break. Bobby shrugs" I want my coffee she's going to make it now"!You were terrified about to do as be says when you are lifted up again this time on Braun Strowmans shoulder. "Make your own coffee Bobby," he says staring him down. You gulp holding onto Braun the best you can. Bobby stomps off mad. "Uh um thanks Braun but um can I get down now"?You feel his body shake with laughter as he placed you down gently.

Becky smiled, thanks big man thought I'd have to handle myself. Braun laughed again, "I'm sure you could Becky I wouldn't doubt your ability for a moment. You just stared in wonder your heart pounding, face blood red. Ever since you saw Braun you were attracted to him every time you were near him you couldn't think straight and grew flustered unable to speak or do anything right. You take a deep breath and manage to quietly say" thank you Bbraun. He smiles gently at you pulling you against him in a side hug" any time " yn" .You stop breathing when he pulls you close and you think you're going to faint before he lets you go. You start breathing again but instantly miss his touch.

Becky gets a call from Seth and walks off to take it leaving you and Braun alone" Wellll" you start off " I better get to work thanks again Braun"- you turn to walk away when he grabs your arm. He looks nervous, "un I was wondering if you weren't busy tomorrow if you would like to go out with me. You stare at him wide-eyed unable to speak but you manage to nod to him. He smiled "well I have your number I'll text you".He quickly leaves to get ready for his match leaving you alone and stunned.

You were done for the night about to leave when your phone vibrated, you looked at it and there was a text from Braun."Have you left yet?"You quickly typed " no".It's only a second later when you received another text " meet me outside the locker room?".You gulp and text back " on my way" before u could change your mind. You put your phone away grabbed your bag and hurried toward the locker room.

You arrive at the locker room door and there is no one around. You have just taken your phone out to text Braun when the locker room door opens and Bobby storms out right into you knocking you to the floor. He growls" stay out of the way you nothing "- he stomps out. Braun opens the door hearing the commotion " what's going on Bob........He sees you on the floor tears in your eyes clutching your right leg. Braun reaches down picking you upholding you close to him. "Oh " yn" I'm so sorry are you ok?

You whine "my leg he stepped on it".Braun growled he knocked you down and steeped on you I'm going to...You cry out in pain stopped his rant. He carried you to the trainer's room, they look you over as Braun paces. Triple H looks over the tape as we wait his face looking furious.

"That dick" he growled The trainer looked up from your leg " it's not broken he said badly bruised its a wonder it's not broken You breathe a sigh of relief. Triple H does as well " I'm sorry this happened I'm going to find him and whatever else I can do including an apology. Braun growls" not good enough this isn't the first time he messed with her I want him. Triple H sighed then looked at you. Becky was telling me your a trained wrestler is that true.

You grit your teeth from the pain. Yes, sir, I am. I have trained for 6 years and was in the independents for 3 before coming here.."Alright" he said I'm going to sign you to a contract we are going to show the footage of him walking over you and make it a storyline you, Braun, and Bobby. Braun smiles " good I'll destroy him for treating her like trash. You gulp " I I I uh I ".Triple H nodded" I'll have your contract ready Monday before the show you will arrive early at one pm look it over and if it's all good sign it. You just nod humbly Braun grinning beside your arm wrapped around your good side. Triple H excused himself and left.

Braun picked up his and your bag leading you toward the exit. He looked nervous " before all this started I wanted to ask you if you wanted to travel with me to the next show especially now since your off till Monday. You somehow manage to find your voice " I'd love to Braun I usually just ride in the back of the van with all the equipment. He shook his head" yn" if you'll let me I'll make sure you never have to again. He stops at the full-size sedan putting both yours and his bags in the trunk.

You hop in the passenger side buckling up" I'll drive when we stop next. Braun smiles getting in buckling up himself " we will talk about it then alright sweetheart. You blush at the nickname.

Sometime during the drive you fall asleep you wake up to Braun gently shaking you "We're here".You blink the sleep away. "Hey, I was spouse to drive some" you pout before yelping in pain as you move your leg forgetting the accident for a second. He looked down at you amused, "maybe next time when you are not hurt let's go check into the hotel".You follow and get checked in with no issues. Braun went to check in as you waited you hear the woman at the desk" oh I'm so sorry sir it seemed we accidentally double-booked your room and have no more available I'm going to refund your money and give you a voucher for a free night at any of our locations. He walks over to you looking stunned, the voucher still in hand. You can't let him just wander around looking for a hotel so you reach up grabbing his hand pulling him toward the elevator. He looks confused. You smile " Big man you helped me out now it's my turn you're going to stay with me. He starts stammering " I I uh I I.You giggle pulling him out of the elevator toward your room." Yes you can and will end of discussion. "You sit your bag down by the bed sitting on it."Braun, we are both adults, while your extremely large we are lucky I'm small and got a king-sized bed now relax it's almost eleven pm we need to sleep if you want to take me on a date tomorrow before needing to go meet with triple H sign my contract, etc. He nods gulping before looking through his suitcase.

Braun went to take a shower while he was in the bathroom you changed into your T-shirt you wore at night then sighed you usually only wore the tee shirt and your panties. You see Brauns open suitcase and put on one of his tee shirts it came to your knees and figured that was good enough. You crawled under the covers texting Becky about what's going on. She was excited and texted to keep her in the loop that we would double date. I laughed shaking my head. Braun walked out of the bathroom in a pair of basketball shorts " what's so funny?"You look up at him " Becky already has us as a couple and wants us to double date with her and Seth at CrossFit. He chuckled " I was wondering if you would agree to be in a relationship with me?" You look at him dumbstruck." are you serious Braun? He sat on the bed looking down at you " Never been any more serious in my whole life I love everything about you your so nice, sweet, passionate, caring, and more your everything I could want in a girlfriend and eventually more. You stare at him tearing up nodding your voice straining with emotion " I'd love to be your girlfriend Braun. He leans down kissing you gently. You close your eyes gripping at his shoulder as if he was going to fade away.

He pulls away stroking your cheek "baby I've been waiting a long time for this and I don't want to rush it and maybe ruin this so let's get some sleep ok?you nod laying down he did the same and you curl up against him it takes a while but eventually, you fall asleep curled against Braun.

The next morning you stretch and notice Braun, not in bed you sit up and see him sitting at the little table in the room talking on his phone eating some breakfast he got. You crawl out of bed walking behind him you reach over stealing a piece of his bacon. He smiles pulling you into his lap hugging you close to him. Into the phone sweet thanks, Gary see you tonight. He hung up "morning sweetie sleep well"?You giggle " like a rock big guy who you meeting tonight. He looked slightly worried well I called my agent he's coming to look over your contract hope it's ok I just want to make sure you get a good deal. You look up at Braun with such awe " Braun that's the kindest sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. He leans down kissing your forehead. Baby, you deserve everything I intend on making sure you get in. You hear Becky's music Braun lets you go as you find your phone answering it."Hey, Becks what's "Becky cuts in" I just heard that you and Braun slept in the same room why didn't you text me"?You sigh "Becky who told you she laughed into the phone Seth saw it last night don't worry just messing with you."You sigh in relive "Becky you had me worried thought we were on TMZ or something but I've got to go talk to you later ok?" Beck laughed" yeh get back to Braun tell him I said hi and not to wear you out too much" You basically yell into the phone " Becky!!" - she hangs up laughing.

Braun has an amused look on his face " she really is something. You nod" yeah she's something alright. Hey " yn" how's your leg?".You smile thinking it's sweet he's worried about you " I barely feel it anymore Braun. He smiles good " let's get dressed then we can go to the farmers market I heard about it's even near the arena and a park. You smile " sounds like a good plan big man."

You both dress quickly and head to the market. You browse with Braun for an hour enjoying just being around each other you both buy a fried apple pie to eat in the park and some apple cider. Braun wonders off on you and returns with a bag when you ask what it is he just says it's a surprise. You are both currently eating your snack in the park when his phone rings." Hello?"Really?" "Great thanks goodbye." Braun looks at you smiling big. My agent looked over the contract and had some things changed he got you a great deal he wants us to come to sign it. You nod."Thanks, Braun.

You and Braun walk into the room where Brauns agent and Triple H were. The agent greeted you and explained everything Braun was right it was a great deal and you eagerly agree."Alright," HHH said, " we will show the video tonight Bobby will do a promo next week the week after will be your debut where you do a promo against Bobby with Braun that's when you will announce your relationship as, well be ready".You don't know where it comes from but you immediately say " don't worry I will be."

The two weeks went by quickly with you training in the ring with Braun getting your teamwork down he was impressed about how well you were doing. You both were so busy tho you barely had time to kiss before collapsing at night due to the training in the ring and for television. Tonight tho you hope it will all pay off. You and Braun are in the gorilla position waiting. You are extremely nervous Braun sees that and hugs you close to his side " relax you got this."You smile taking a deep Breath as Brauns music went off. You lift your head getting into character. You march out first fists clinched at your side. Braun follows behind you you both March down to the middle of the ring and both he and you raise your arms at the same time.

Braun grabs the mic and hands it to you. You look around at all the fans and take a deep breath. Hello, Chicago you might not know me I'm "yn" and well I'm Braun Strowman's girlfriend".There is a mixture of cheers and boos around the arena." Hey hey, it's ok to be jealous I know I'm lucky to have this monster".Braun leans in " I'm the lucky one" There is a round of " oohs" around the arena. You smile up at him " down to business three weeks ago I was standing outside the locker room waiting on Braun when Bobby Lashley came barreling out of the door knocked me down stepped on me and called me nothing. You act chocked up and Braun takes the mic pulling you into a side hug keeping his arm around you." Bobby shes, not nothing shes my whole world, and for hurting her you are going to GET THESE HANDS!! Bobby's music plays and he and Lana walk out onto the ramp. Lana gets a mic. You are thinking we didn't rehearse, get told about, or plan this. Lana clears her throat " Yn" why are you making a big deal about this so he knocked you down at least you got to touch this Adonises body I'm sure it was exciting and now you're jealous because you can't have this perfect man. Bobby takes the mic "I'm sure even tho Braun is rather large not all of him is and cant satisfy you as I could. You are flustered and mad you grab the mic and angry growl " I'll have you know Braun is very proportion everywhere and has no problem keeping me very happy and satisfied. The crowd cheers.

Braun chuckles " why don't you come down here so you can Get These Hands? Bobby shakes his head " I'll beat you whenever I choose not on your time and I chose extreme rules. Braun grins " we will be there"You take the mic almost screaming in it " And you will Get These Hands!!

Braun then has a match where he easily squashes the indy wrestler and you both head to the back. Becky is waiting in the Gorilla and hugs you "you did so good I'm so proud of you. You smile " thanks but I wasn't told they were coming out I hope I didn't say anything wrong. Becky grins " you should be fine you danced around inappropriate perfectly.

Braun agrees with Becky before looking up at a runner who approached us." Sir ma'am McMahon and Mr. Helmsley wish to see you both in Mr.Helmsleys office. You gulp looking nervous. Braun chuckles " relax baby you didn't go off-script first and you didn't say anything wrong.

You both walk to the office Braun sees how nervous you are and takes your hand in his before knocking on the door with the other. Mr.McMahon says come in Braun opens the door and you both walk inside. Mr.McMahon is behind the desk Hunter standing beside him."Have a seat. You sit in a chair Braun stands behind you.

I'm sure you both are wondering why we called you in here. Hunter speaks up we are very proud of you "yn" we wanted to test you that's why we didn't tell you they were coming out you passed with flying colors, you skirted around being inappropriate perfectly. We have decided to extend the storyline past Extreme Rules. You smile "Thank you very much. They smile " also " Mr.McMahon slides a paper over to you and you see a tee shirt design with your name on it. You look up surprised. Hunter looks at you "Like it?" Like it? I love it" McMahon slides you another paper "sign and we will get it into production." You quickly sign it. You and Braun walk out extremely happy once you are into a free hallway you hug each other.

He holds you close " I'm so proud of you baby I love you".It feels like your world stopped as you looked up at him tears in your eyes." I love you to Braun." You stay together hugging for a while before heading to the locker rooms to get your bags.

You both go to the hotel room, shower and you are currently snuggling in bed your head on his bare chest. You look up at him "Braun I um well can we?"Braun looks down at you " can we what baby?" he asks smirk on his face. Your face is blood red " You lean up kissing him deeply he returns the kiss slipping his tongue in your mouth placing his hand on the back of your head.

He pulls back slightly looking into your eyes. Are you sure you would like to do this baby? You smile up at Braun," please Brauny, please.

He slowly pulls you into the middle of the bed nipping your neck "you're so beautiful".His words make you blush. He pulls the shirt off of you leaving you only in your panties. His large hands cover your boobs he pinches your nipples causing your back to arch and cry out. He watches concentrating on your reactions." Mmmmmm Braun more, please. He chuckles " We got all night baby.

He pinches your nipples again you jump and twist one of his nipple rings. He growls at you carefully you are playing a dangerous game baby girl."Mmmmm maybe we could get you some nipple rings. You smile "next break we get I'm game. He reaches down pulling on your panties and accidentally tears them from your body causing you to gasp. He blushes " sorry". You giggle " buy me a new pair and we are good. Braun chuckles " if you let me see them on you I'll buy you ten. You feel him gently slide one of his large fingers inside of you it causes you to moan. Its voice is low with lust " baby you are soaked

It causes you to groan. Braun starts to rub your g spot quickly putting some pressure on it. The sensation causes you to wiggle under him he holds you down with his free hand. You cry out cumming hard your vision goes white. You hardly feel him slide into you all the way to the hilt. As you come down you feel his size in you causing you to whimper some. Braun kisses and nips at your neck to distract you.

After a few moments, you buck up against him testing it."Alright, I'm good you can move" Braun kisses you gently and starts thrusting in and out of you steady and hard. You pant moaning against his lips. Braun pulls away from kissing your shoulders and neck." Brauunnn" you moan " faster please faster" Braun Angel's his self arching into your clit causing you to see stars." Braun, I'm close" you pant out. He keeps going he reaches down pinching your g spot it pushes you over the edge it causes you to cum so hard you pass out. He cums in you and pulls out. He cleans you both up and carries you to the other bed in the room. He crawls in beside you and falls asleep with you.

You wake the next morning Brauns arms wrapped around you. He's fast asleep holding you close you stare at him for a few minutes before trying to get loose. He grumbles in his sleep pulling you closer. His hand slips between your legs and starts rubbing your G-spot. You gasp "Braun "? He snores some as his hand keeps rubbing. You moan wiggling in his grasp it makes you start panting."Braun" You cry out before cumming Braun wakes to blink his hand stilling.

He pulls his hand away " did I hurt you?" You shake your head " no you just gave me a mind-blowing orgasm. He chuckles well if that's all. He rubs your cheek " you are perfect. Braun, you are such a sweet talker.

It has been a week since you debuted on Monday Night Raw and you and Braun have been making love any chance you got. You were both backstage talking to Seth and Becky when Tripple H ran up " we have a problem Brock refuses to show up and we need to fill five minutes. Bobby and Lana had done a promo earlier we need you to do a counter one but you will have to wing it with no script.

You follow him backstage to where a camera crew is."I'm trusting you to don't let me down. You stand in front of Braun he drapes his arms over your shoulders. You nod at the cameraman and he indicates it's recording. You smirk " Oh Bobby you look a little frustrated is Lana not enough woman for you? Braun smirks never look for a lady in a hooooooooooo. Braun lifts his hand in a thumbs-up as the whole arena echoes hoooooooo. Braun is going to take you out and Lana if you try to interfere in the destruction of your bf. You are going to get these hands you slut.

They indicate the recording is over. They quickly send it to the production truck.HHH grins it is perfect like I knew you would do perfectly I see great things in your future "yn"."Thank you sir me and Braun always do our best. I would not be anywhere near the level I am without him. Braun suddenly places you on his shoulder" nonsense "yn" "you are a talented hard worker."

Extreme Rules come before you know it the match had been made a No discolifacation match. Braun and Bobby practiced some but with the hatred between you four, it was decided to wing most of it. You are pacing backstage scared to death. Braun walks up behind you placing a hand on your shoulder. Calm down " yn" we have been practicing for this we are going to destroy them. I nod "you're right big man ".

The match was violent both men put to destroy the other you and Lana kept out of the way most of the match. Then the referee was knocked down that was planned. Lana slid into the ring with a chair that was unplanned so you follow suit sliding into the ring with your own chair. You and Lana glared at each other in a standoff. Lana screamed and swung the chair at you you swing yours at the same time you are stronger knocking her off of her feet she rolls out of the ring clutching her hands to her chest screaming. You throw the chair to Braun you turn to get out of the ring and Bobby kicks you in the head everything goes black.

Your groan blinking "too bright". A large hand moves in front of your face " thanks big boy".Braun smiles " do you remember what happened?" You whine rubbing your head. Heard Lana say now Bobby take him out for good I stopped her he kicked me right?" You slowly move Brauns's hand and see you're in a hospital room. Yeh they caught it in audio they both have been suspended you broke both of her hands".I smile " so how bad am I?" Braun stroked your cheek concussion you'll be out for 2-4 weeks. Management is doing damage control and when you come back they plan on pushing you maybe put the title on you. I close my eyes " not good enough he will do it to someone else" He nods that's what I said they've agreed he won't come back unless he takes anger management goes through psychological counseling, and a harassment course then they will consider letting him back Lana has to do the same"." Also, both are required to stay 30 feet from us both at all time and we won't have to wrestle them again."

You open your eyes looking up at him " thank you Braun that sounds good".You notice tears in his eyes" I'm sorry "yn" I should have been able to protect you." You shake your head taking his hand." Braun I love you this wasn't your fault it's mine because I was protecting you and I would do it again." Braun smiles sniffling. I love you too.

You went home to rest for the weeks you recovered you and Braun texted and talked on the phone but you missed him like crazy. It was WrestleMania weekend so you didn't hear much from Braun. You had just got cleared to wrestle when Triple H called he had you get on a plane and fly straight there. They kept you hidden from everyone but Becky you and her practiced because she was going to drop the belt to you in the ultimate Wrestlemania surprise.

Tonight was the night you were waiting alone in a guarded locker room when Triple H walked in." ready "yn".You stand "you are going to make sure Braun watches right?" He smiles " yeh I'll make sure he's in the gorilla position." Thanks, Trip. You make your way to the gorilla position. Becky was in the ring " I'm tired of facing the same old woman week in week out this is Wrestlemania so any woman I haven't wrestled for the championship this is your time.

Your music played and the entire crowd was on their feet. The noise was deafening as you walked onto the stage. You smile brightly " I'll take that offer Becky" then you run to the ring. The match was the best you ever put on. In the end, you finished Becky off in a modified version of the rko.

The crowd was deafening but you didn't notice you hugged the title crying you never thought this would happen that your life would be so perfect. Brauns music snapped you back from your celebration. He hurried to the ring hugging you closely.

The entire locker room fills the ramp as Braun grabs a mic you put the championship on your shoulder. Braun stood across from you taking your hand "Yn" I met you a few months ago and I knew from the moment I saw you you were special, my love for you has just grown from that day. Will you do me the honor of spending the rest of our lives together?"Braun gets down on one knee pulling out a box he slowly opens it revealing the most gorgeous ring you have ever seen." "Yn" will you marry me"?

You shiver everything overwhelming you. You look down at his love in your eyes. You nod " yes yes yes Braun yes yes".The crowd is deafening the roster invades the ring everyone congratulating you both. You are on top of the world it couldn't get any better. Lana slipped into the crowd no one noticed her she slipped up behind you and hit your leg as hard as she could with a bat. You feel to the ground screaming grabbing your leg rolling around in agony. Security drags Lana off as the rest of the roster tries to get you help.

Just like that your whole life is changed forever

[lemonietrinket]

Jae’s Divine Intervention ||| Wonpil x Reader, Jae & Reader

Summary: Jae finds out about your crush on Wonpil and naturally takes the mick out of you. And when you get to play detective, you find out he’s perhaps more supportive than you would normally imagine.  Genre: Humour, fluff [if you guys dont find this funny then i... its just me] Warning(s): Some cursing all done in jest (2x sh*t) Word Count: 7735  Theme Song: Tonight - The Solutions; Dive - iKON; Hold - Winner AN: A request from anon, hope you enjoy! I’m sorry it took a while, it’s a lot longer than I usually write tho so I hope that makes up for it gender neutral reader

~~~

“Wonpil?!”

“Jae, I swear to christ—”

“Wonpil?!” Jae’s voice was rising in pitch by the second, a look of astounded horror on his face.

“Yes, Wonpil, what’s so—”

“Our keys? The snake? Our snake that plays the keys?”

“Really, you’re still using that? That’s like, three years old Jae—”

“You—you took one look at the pink sweater and went hmmm, yes, this is the hot stuff, real sexy—”

“Jae!”

“—any man that wears this I will date him on the spot—!”

“Jae!” 

The man cackled, leaning right back into his gaming chair with his head tipped over the side. “Oh my god this is just...!”

You pressed your tongue to your cheek, waiting for the grown man to gather himself up. Though, knowing Jae, it could well take a while. “You finished?”

He swung back, elbows coming to his knees with his eyes incredulous. “Kim Wonpil?”

“Yes.”

“Not Brian?”

“Why would it be Brian?”

He inhaled through his teeth, tutting. “It’s always Brian. And then, of course, yours truly.”

You sighed, rolling your eyes. “I regret ever talking to you.”

He sat back, sending you a smirk. “Nahh, you would never regret me.”

“Can we just go back to discussing like, dinner tonight?” you glanced distastefully around at his room, taking note of the pile of laundry abandoned by his wardrobe. “Like I came into your lair for in the first place?” 

“Hey, easy there—!”

“Honestly Sungjin would have a fit if he comes in here,” you announced, a mischievous glint in your eye.

“Well it’s a good job he isn’t coming in here.” Jae easily met your stare, pursing his lips, knowing full well that starting a battle with him would be the hardest you could try to win in the dorm. You backed down, but didn’t shy away from his stare as he pressed his fingertips together, taking on the role of a faux mastermind, “But no, dinner can wait, because this—this—is much more intriguing.”

Taking in the nod of his head, and the smug grin on his features, you realised that you weren’t going to escape as you’d hoped. Might as well be comfortable.

“Now,” he began once you took a seat on his bed, flicking a rogue sock to the floor, “start from the beginning. When did you realise that you were hopelessly in love with this, Mr Kim.”

“Since when was this an interrogation?” you interjected. “Also I am not ‘hopelessly in love’!”

“Infatuated?”

“No!”

“Lovesick?”

“Not a bit!”

“Helplessly inclined on the edge of your seat to hang upon his every little word?”

You didn’t even answer him that time and merely glared at him. 

He nodded pensively, patting a finger against his chin as he murmured, “In denial, interesting...”

“What?!” 

He changed tact. “Do you not know the exact time for your realisation for your deep feelings?”

“Even if I did I wouldn’t tell you,” you sulked, folding your arms crossly. He let out a quiet ‘aww’, which you ignored to the best of your capacity. “What has gotten into you?”

“I’m just trying to work out if you are,” he cleared his throat, “fit for my closest colleague and good friend. After all, we’ve been through so much, I wouldn’t want any harm to come to him—”

There were many things wrong to his wistful, jesting sentence, but there was one thing that you had to refute: “Last week you told Sungjin you would sell Pillie out for half a churro.”

His smart mouth stopped for a few seconds, and you figured briefly that you’d perhaps won and could leave. Alas, you were mistaken.

“Refers to Mr Kim as ‘Pillie’, indicating a very special degree of endearment, interesting...”

You groaned, falling back onto the rest of the mattress, asking the world what you’d done to deserve this.

Truth be told, Jae wasn’t worried for his bandmate or you in the slightest. Hearing your accidental slip of your feelings, everything seemed to come together at once and fit like two missing jigsaw pieces. You both had traits that accentuated the other, and you got along so well. If you two got together, he discerned, there would be few power couples that could compete.

He didn’t understand shipping culture, but this was perhaps his one exception. It just made sense! His soft charms next to your harder ones, your sense next to his sunny optimism, the both of you still sharing much in common.

“Six months,” you suddenly admitted.

“Hmm?”

“My, you do delight in my torment,” you grumbled before shooting him a look that softened as you continued, the memory trickling to the surface and making it impossible for you to not smile. “I’ve liked him for six months. It hit me when he fell asleep on my shoulder on our trip up to Incheon.”

One of those shared things being bouts of shyness.

He decided in that moment that it was time for some divine intervention.

“That’s a long time ago,” he mentioned, “and you haven’t done anything about it?”

“How could I?” you countered, though it was more sad than feisty. “How do I confess to the gentlest, happiest soul? How am I supposed to even know if he likes me back? He’s cuddly with everyone, you know.”

One glance at your crestfallen eyes that shone through your little chuckle lit a spark in his head.

“Don’t you worry, Y/N. God works in mysterious ways,” he reassured, sending you a wink.

And so began the grand unravelling of The Great Jae’s plan. 

Step 1: Establish if the Feelings are Mutual

The first step, as Jae understood it, was crucial—nothing else could be done until he knew if the keyboardist also had a whopping crush on his friend. And they had made some fair points about how hard it would be to calculate whether Wonpil was just being friendly affectionate or more than that.  

So, to get the answer cleanly without collateral, Jae concocted a plan so cunning he could put a tail on it and call it a weasel.

The next day, Jae slipped into the practice room, after locating his whereabouts through a super secret and effective method dubbed as ‘asking Sungjin’. He strode up to the keyboard set where the younger was staring intently at one of the keys, swiftly adopting a confident stance—he would not be swayed by any sneak attacks, and especially not attempted deflections with puppy eyes: a weapon he knew his bandmate was highly proficient in.

Hearing him mumbling about whether they should invent a H note, Jae made the choice to enact Step 1, taking advantage of the possible surprise characteristic.

“Wonpil, do you like Y/N?” 

Peering up with his classic bright smile, Wonpil answered him swiftly, “Yeah!”

Jae frowned, the response seeming too quick. He had to comprehend it as a misunderstanding of his question. He pressed the charge. “Well, yeah, I figured you liked them, but I meant it as in more of a—”

“I know how you meant it, hyung,” he looked back at the keys, testing a C tentatively.

“Oh.” Jae was surprised to say the least. “How did you...?” 

“I’ve been waiting for one of you to ask me,” he explained poutily, “you always seemed to tease me about it when I didn’t have someone, and then as soon as I actually fell, not a peep.” 

Jae had to admit that the entire exchange had caught him off guard, as he became distinctly aware of how slowly the cogs were turning in his head. “You were... waiting?”

He nodded urgently at the sound board, twisting a dial as he held his ear closer to the instrument.

“You know the sound isn’t on right?”

“The key is squeaky.”

“Oh.”

“Of course I was waiting,” Wonpil replied simply, taking a simpering pause, “aren’t you going to ask me?” 

Jae watched as the younger suddenly sat up and swung himself to look at the legs of his keyboard stand, giving them a good wobble. There was no doubt a squeak then.

“Ask what, about what you like about them?” he suggested, not really sure himself. 

“Finally!” The younger threw himself back out from underneath the instrument. “Everything, hyung, I think I’m actually in love! Their laugh, their kindness, their eyes, their jokes—I feel like I’m going to burst whenever I see them, like into just, laughter, I can’t stop smiling, I just want to hug them and kiss their nose...” When he knocked his head back up to him, his smile was even brighter, his cheeks lightly blushed. “Is this what Younghyun-hyung means when he says that love hurts?”

Jae was more than happy to hear proof—it meant Step 1 was a success after all—but hearing the sap did mean he had to hide his grimace.  But now he was presented with a more severe problem, as he knew full well that wasn’t what the bassist, who could dip into the realms of emo territory, meant at all by that phrase.

It didn’t mean he was going to explain it. Especially seeing those eyes brimming with adoration for his closest friend—he cursed at himself giving into the puppy eyes after all. 

“Yeah, probably,” he answered vaguely, opting to change the subject, “well, I’d better be off, thanks!”

“Hey, hyung, where do you think you’re going?” Wonpil called after him as he attempted to make a tactical retreat, having gathered the information he needed. 

Jae turned around, lying through his teeth as his brain searched for an excuse. “I... well, I need to go and do...”

“Without wishing me good luck on fixing my keyboard stand?” he enquired, pouting childishly from the other side of the room.

“Good luck...?”

“Ok, you can go!” he announced, sending a wave. “Bye!”

And with that, Jae exited the practice room, frowning at his reflection in the glass of the window as he passed through. Wonpil was strange sometimes, that was for sure. 

It didn’t matter in the long run though, it was going to be your problem soon rather than his—a thought that elicited a snicker from him—and with Step 1 complete, he could proceed to Step 2. 

Step 2: Create the Confession Arrangement

Jae had figured that the third step would have required the most work, but he had be drastically wrong. He’d presumed coming up with the perfect scenario for a confession would have been easy, but once he’d sat down in the living room to think in peace, an hour later he found himself lying on the floor, staring up at the ceiling, without a single idea in his head. 

Chasing the tails of all the ideas that taunted him and skipped just out of reach every time in his head, he barely heard the sound of someone else entering the fray.  And he would have continued to have done, had the newcomer not come to stand beside him and peered over his sprawled body.

“Hyung, are you ok?”

The deep voice snapped his eyes from where they were transfixed on the ceiling to the cherubic face of Dowoon, currently in the process of devouring a pretzel.

Jae snorted, still barely comprehending his presence. “Of course.”

The younger tilted his head to see him somewhat the correct way up. “Are you sure? You’re laying on the floor.”

“I am aware, and yes, a hundred percent,” he answered, putting on a confident front as best he could, “this, young padawan, is the sight of a master at work.”

Dowoon hummed in an agreement of sorts, “Oh, right.”  He took a deep bite of the sweet dough. “What are you working on?”

Jae finally recognised the notable rustling of a paper packet, his eyes falling to the treat. “I am devising the most wondrous plan the world has seen to—is that my vanilla pretzel?”

“No.”

He said it so quick and devoid of emotion there was no way to tell whether it was a lie or not. Jae was left peering up at the man as he took another bite, who sent him a thumbs up as a form of endorsement.  “Right. Well... I am devising a plan that will get Wonpil and Y/N to admit their feelings for one another and finally unite as the planet’s best ship and sail off into the distance together!” A victorious grin on his lips, he looked like a man that had already found success. “I have already completed Step 1 with peak success, now I must move to Step 2 and—”

“What was Step 1?”

“Finding out whether their feelings were mutual, of course!” Jae guffawed, surprised that Dowoon could not connect the two dots.

He peered over to him again to see him frowning as he angled himself to take the final bite of the pretzel. Before he could ask what the matter was, he preempted him, stating, “You didn’t know?”

That caught the eldest off guard. “What?”

“You didn’t know that they both like each other?” he glanced towards him, eyes expectant as he shoved the dough past his lips. “I thought everyone knew.”

“Well, I...” Jae coughed, quickly covering his back, “...there’s a difference between assumption and ascertaining proof, maknae. Now that I have evidence I may move onto Step 2.”

“And that is?”

Jae caught the tone of curiosity this time in the intonation of the man’s deep voice, making note to take advantage of it as soon as possible. “Create the confession arrangement. I must make a scenario where the only possible eventuality is that the two confess to one another their true feelings.”

Dowoon nodded, licking his fingertips free of leftover sugar.

“You wanna help?” he enquired, angling his head to get a better view of his band mate’s features, waiting for the smile to arise.

“Sure.” Discarding the paper bag on the coffee table nearby, he lowered himself to the floor, laying on his back and mimicking his elder. 

“Good choice,” Jae clapped, turning his attention back to the ceiling.

“What ideas have you got so far, then?” Dowoon began, drumming his fingers against his stomach as he followed suit.

“Well...” Panic filtered through Jae’s system, as he suddenly realised he didn’t have even the tiniest beginnings of a thread to follow, let alone a part of a suggestion. “We could lock them in a room,” his mouth said before his brain could catch up. He cursed to himself in his head. No, that was stupid. It was so inhumane! 

“What, like an escape room scenario?”

Jae’s head immediately tilted towards the man lying beside him. Yoon Dowoon, as things turned out, was a secret genius. 

Without warning, he laughed, getting to his feet and grabbing the younger by his hand to pull him up after him. “Yes! Exactly like an escape room!” He held him by the shoulders and asked, “Do you have any ideas for any puzzles? Or riddles? Could be an anagram, or a pattern somehow, maybe general knowledge based?”

Dowoon thought long and hard for a moment, and it showed on his face, his dark eyes going wide as his jaw dropped. “No, but I know where to get the keys to the locks on the doors.”

Their eyes met for a good few seconds as Jae mulled over the decision of whether to bring up how he had obtained such knowledge. He finally rationalised he’d ask at another less frantic time. 

“Great!” he exclaimed, before ordering, “You go sort that. I’ll go get some pens and paper. Be quick!”

And so Step 2 was in motion.

Step 3: Organise the Confession Arrangement

“Ok, listen up soldiers,” Jae declared, “because here’s the plan.”

He was stood at the front of the work room beside a board that he’d stolen from the marketing block, proudly displaying a rudimentary plan of the dormitory and accompanied by several haphazard arrows drawn in a dying pen. He overlooked the rest of the room courageously, eyeing up his gang of abductees volunteers, who merely stared at him confusedly in return. 

“Why am I here, again?” Sungjin suddenly enquired, glancing around the room. “This surely is one of those Things-We-Don’t-Tell-Sungjin-About things, right? I’m pretty sure I’m not supposed to know about this.”

“But none of us do...!” Jae uttered, rolling his palms to encourage the others to catch onto his meaning. They didn’t. “None of us know about it, yeah? Because none of us did it!”

“But that makes no sense,” Sungjin rationalised immediately, “because someone will have had to have set all the puzzles up?”

Jae didn’t have an answer to that. To both a blessing and a curse, however, he didn’t have to reply to that question. He just got another one in its place.

“I’m sorry, wait, what are we even doing?” Younghyun interjected, glaring at the hastily dictated plan with a curled lip. 

“Getting Wonpil and Y/N together, we’ve been over this, Brian.”

“Surely they can just... do it themselves though, right?” Sungjin countered, squinting at the header of the board. “It really doesn’t require an all-out, multi-step plan—is this Step 3?” 

“Good to see you’re checking the diagram,” Jae retorted.

Younghyun’s voice was incredulous, “How many steps are there?!” 

“Four.” It was Dowoon’s turn to interrupt, it seemed, and he piped up fluidly before Jae could try to regain any control upon the late night board meeting.

“What were steps 1 and 2?!”

“Step 2 was inventing this beautiful idea,” Jae started.

Only for Dowoon to finish, “Step 1 was him working out if Wonpil liked Y/N back.”

It was their turn to eye Jae up in disbelief, a chorus erupting:

“You didn’t know?!”

“How can you’ve not known?!”

“All he does is pine after them...!”

“Alright alright!” Jae called, pleading for the three to settle. To his fortune they did, but most likely only out of the prospective joy of him further making a fool of himself. “The past steps don’t matter, I need your help now to complete Step 3. You will all reap the benefits of Step 4, when this is all a success because—as you said—all Wonpil does is pine after Y/N. This,” he pointed assertively to the diagram, “will put a stop to all that!”

Silence settled over the room as the three all glanced at each other, all nodding in some form in agreement. 

Jae took the chance and continued, his hand laying out the directions on the board as he spoke, “So, all we have to is move Wonpil to Y/N’s room, and set up the puzzles in there. Sungjin, Dowoon, you’re on set-up, Brian you’re on lift duty. It is all objectively simple, but one wrong move could wake either of them up thus exposing the entire ploy and I’ve yet to come up with an excuse so you’ll be on your own.”

“Of course,” Younghyun muttered, not even bothering to look Jae in the eye to convey the sense of how done he was. 

“You’re not helping?” Dowoon piped up, his soft features portraying a slight hue of hurt.

“I can’t, Y/N already expects me. If I’m caught then there’s zero opportunity of a follow up plan—at least one that features me,” Jae explained, ignoring the mumbles of ‘perhaps it would be better that way’ that echoed around the room. He shot a look to the one he suspected the most of being the owner of said grumblings, watching as he leant back in his chair. 

“Can this not at least wait ‘til tomorrow?” Younghyun requested, emphasising his point with a yawn. 

“No! Y/N is out Saturday, and regardless we must strike while the iron is hot!”

This sent the energy of the room from benevolent boredom to startled flurry.

“It’s happening right now?!” The leader desperately looked to the eldest for reassurance that this was most certainly not the case, only to find none.

“Yep,” he stated, a shrug on his shoulders and a smirk on his lips. “Once you’re done, you make sure you leave no trace of yourselves and lock the door. Leave the key on the living room table and then you may return to your own rooms and do what you wish—as long as there is no noise. If their sleep is interrupted, the plan could quickly go south,” he finished with a clap, “now, positions everyone! And good luck!”

With only a few groans, the three practically sprung into action, much to Jae’s surprise. Dowoon piled up the props and prompts riddled with such in his arms, Sungjin holding the door for him and Younghyun who both head out in quick succession. 

“Thank you, Sungjin,” Jae called to the door. He received an expression of many emotions—disdain, disbelief, bemusement—all around a set of very bright eyes. He exhaled abruptly in what was a laugh that demonstrated that mixture, before leaving with the shake of his head.

It was showtime.

You awoke gradually to the sun streaming through the wide gap between the curtains. Groaning, you cursed to yourself about how you’d forgotten to close them the night before.

After admitting that if you wanted to go back to sleep or even just lay in your bed in peace for a bit longer the curtains would have to close, you sat up, only to swear you had shut them the night before.

Rolling out of the covers dozily, you hobbled over to the window, squinting against the light, where upon the curtain tie you found a piece of paper dictating a series of hand-drawn triangles in shades of pink, grey and white. Rubbing your eyes you tried to detach it, only to find it secured with string. 

Feeling confusion flush through your bones as quickly as the sleep left them, you looked across the room to see another sheet of thin card this time, roughly torn at the corner and branded with a giant, rounded, crimson splodge adorned with a malformed triangle of green. 

Both thoughtless and speechless in entirety, your eyes frantically searched the room for further signs of intrusion. To your disturbance you found your room littered with rudimentary placards, decorated with strange arrows directing to one another, or strange looped calligraphy. One was stuck crudely to a Star Wars shopping bag, and as much as you enjoyed The Rise of Skywalker, you definitely did not have a bag for it. Another was blatantly an anagram. Making the mistake of looking up you were confronted with a gigantic poster of a film with the title and cast heading covered by MS Paint swirls. The image depicted seemed familiar, but it didn’t make their staring faces any less intimidating as they glared at you from your ceiling.  It was as if you’d walked into a nightmare that was haunted by puzzless.

“What the actual, ever loving f—” Your voice cut off as soon as your gaze finally rested back upon your bed. Only to find someone else in it. 

Thoroughly creeped out, your brain ricocheting through thoughts and questions like they were caught in a hurricane—who is that, how long have they been there, they were sleeping right next to me, they snuck into my room, is it a sasaeng, did they do anything—you were ready to charge towards the door and yell your lungs out for help.

Until the figure shifted in their sleep, their arms thrown up cutely by their head which peaked out from behind the duvet. It was Wonpil.

Breath catching in your throat, your hand clasped itself to your mouth in an effort to not shriek in surprise more than anything. 

You’d shared your bed with Wonpil. He’d been right beside you, his beautiful face just inches from yours, sleeping peacefully with his hands sweetly gripping the covers and his adorable little snores—

Your heart lurched at the image your mind conjured, for it to then crash over the fact that he had the audacity to sneak into your room.  The conundrum before you left you in turmoil—you couldn’t believe that you’d fallen so hard for a man who would break into your room in the middle of the night and disregard your privacy so blazonly. 

It didn’t make any sense. You’d known Wonpil for a while, and he showed so much respect the entirety of that time. Yes, he was clingy, but you could think of multiple occasions where you had told him to back off and give you space, because you were stressed or angry with someone else or even just too hot to let him lay on your shoulder, and every time he did. You couldn’t think of a single time when he came into your room without knocking either. 

But was that enough to discount the ‘first time for everything’ rule?

Given the circumstances, perhaps it was.

Regarding the mess of your room again, it was plausible that Wonpil could have put up some of the weird pieces of card, but he couldn’t have done it all—not without help at least. Taking in the height of your ceiling, he was too short to reach it. Had someone stood on your bed you would have woken up, there was no doubt about it, and you didn’t have a desk in your room, so there was no chairs to stand on. The nearest ones were in the others’ rooms, but it seemed too far of a stretch—especially since you knew that there was one person that could reach.

Jae.

You glared in disdain at the corner of your room as if you were on The Office, until you remembered that you weren’t alone in the room. 

Taking a deep breath you silently made your way across your rug to the side of your bed. Kneeling in the soft cotton you took in the sight of Wonpil closer this time, resisting the urge to stroke his soft cheek that he’d puffed out as he pouted in his sleep. Perhaps it wouldn’t be long before he woke. 

“This wasn’t you, was it,” you murmured to him, taking gentle delight in how he wriggled towards you in his sleep at the distant sound of your voice. He looked so sweet, and the concept of being able to wake up to him beside you every morning made heat rush to your cheeks like a tsunami. 

He was so good at making you smile, he could do it without even trying. The thought reminded you of when he had gone out of his way to somewhat try to, making you his chosen target for the only ‘prank’ he’d ever performed. He’d decided that he would for his prank debut place  tiny plastic dinosaurs around the place for you to run into. You’d been bemused, but only for a day, quickly finding him out after catching him placing one in the fridge. 

It was fortunate that you’d been reminded of the memory—even if you were primarily focused on how angelically he’d giggled a threadbare excuse that neither of you believed for a second but only made you fall in love further—as it that had been a while ago, and filling your room with strange and distastefully carried out puzzles was not what you figured his prank comeback would be. He would at the very least make them look nice. 

“I’m sorry for doubting you,” you whispered, tucking the blanket further to his chin to keep him warm before getting to your feet again. You had to admit, you got a bit of a rush out of playing detective, and with a theory hot on your mind, you knew it wouldn’t be long before you found evidence that proved it.

First you checked the door it discover it locked as you had expected. Then you moved to the puzzles.  Staring intently at the placards, you found that they all pointed to someone who was either awful at editing and drawing alike, or had simply done it in haste and didn’t care for the visual outcome. However this was not as concrete as you’d imagined. You definitely couldn’t see it being anyone other than Jae but after checking several puzzles and not seeing a single bad joke or reference in sight, you were beginning to doubt your first impressions.

Hearing the bed creak and a groggy whine muffled by a yawn, you flicked your head away from your wardrobe. There you found Wonpil sat up in a nest of your duvets at his waist, with dishevelled hazel tresses endowing him with faux cat ears or sorts. He was barely awake and hardly functioning, blinking lethargically while he slowly returned to the world of the living.

“Morning,” you greeted with a stutter, clearing your throat sheepishly straight after.

His lips spread cutely into a grin. “Morning...!” he sang. 

It took several minutes of you trying to maintain your gaze on the messy art piece that was sleepy Wonpil, before giving up and disappointedly returning to the barely-legible riddle in your hands, for the man to finally speak with up with a frown.

“Wait, why are you in my room?” he enquired, rubbing his nose. “Did you sneak in...?”

“Actually you’re in mine,” you corrected, squinting at the calligraphy so as to let him come to terms with the situation.

His eyes opened in a flash, glancing around the room in astonishment. “Oh my god why am—I’m in yours?!” He gushed with apologies. “I’m sorry, Y/N, I didn’t sneak in I promise, I don’t remember coming in here! I don’t understand... did I sleepwalk...?”

“If you did it would be a first,” you stated, chucking the paper to the bin near your closet and staggering to your feet, “it’s ok, Pil, I’m not mad. Besides, I think you were carried.”

“Carried?”

“You always were a heavy sleeper. But that does mean that Younghyun or Dowoon are in on this, which means I don’t understand what this whole thing is,” you explained, glancing up at the ceiling and sighing exasperatedly, “do you recognise that movie?”

Following your line of sight, he jumped at the sudden pair of eyes that he found staring at him. He shook his head. “N-no. Y/N... what’s going on?”

“Apparently the guys decided that for their latest prank they were going to make an escape room of sorts, and then stuck you in here with me for double the fun.”

“But why?”

You shrugged. “I guess they’ll open the door if we figure out all the puzzles of something. Problem is these puzzles are like, stupidly hard.” You pointed over to his right. “Like, why is there a mutant tomato on my wall?”

“Ew,” Wonpil said with a grimace as he beheld the visage of the red splodge. 

“I know right. Whichever one of the did it should never consider art school. Like, ever.”

Silence fell over the two of you as your eyebrows knit together, once again thinking over the possible answers to any of the dozens of puzzles. Wonpil meanwhile slipped out of your blankets and headed towards the door.

You had half a mind to call out to him and say it was locked, but you figured he’d already worked that out, so instead you watched him out of curiosity. 

He came to the door with a stop, rattled on the door handle once, then twice, before pressing his face close to the wood. “Sungjin!” he wailed, before pressing his ear to it to listen.

For several moments there was complete utter quiet over the room and the dorm outside. The only sound that could be heard was the birds outside, and even they broke into quiet when they heard an unusual absence of chatter. 

Then out of the blue Wonpil stiffened in his place, before leaning in even further, his features alert. 

After a few seconds you enquired mimicking the quiet, “What is it?”

“I think I just heard someone tell Sungjin that he ‘needed to remain strong’,” Wonpil looked at you quizzically, “what does that mean?”

“Sungjin’s in on it too?” You were hugely surprised by that, so much so that you couldn’t hide it in your voice, the volume tipping out of the realms of a murmur. You’d thought it was a certainty that Sungjin was not aware of what was going on, because he was too mature to play along. But you’d clearly gotten him wrong this time around.  “Th-that must mean this is serious,” you continued, slipping into a slow pacing motion across to the window and back, “that it’s super funny, or that he goes to seriously gain something from this.”

“But how is this funny, I’m not laughing...!” Wonpil said with a pout audible on his lips. He wondered if there was a funnier side that he was missing out on due to his concern for you overpowering it. He didn’t like how you stepped back and forth, even if it was only slow and steady and hardly impulsive. He didn’t want you to be stressed, he wanted you to be happy.  It dawned on him that it was becoming increasingly harder for him to hold himself back from meeting you part-way and bring you to a stop, his hands brushing your shoulders and squeezing them gently in reassurance as he met your eyes— He shook his head, sending him hurtling out of his imagination just in time to hear you agree.

“Exactly, unless he wrote some of the riddles and his sense of humour was not what I thought it was—what we thought it was.”

“But Sungjin would never use stuff this bad!” he cried, hand motioning to the poorly executed diagrams while his eyes trailed away from you and onto the tomato on the wall. “He would be much more careful than... that—I don’t think he ever could make something that ugly!”

“Exactly!” you echoed his tone of urgency. “Which means he stands to gain! But what the hell does he get out of locking two people in a room with a bunch of evil puzzles?”

Watching your form become gradually tenser by the second, Wonpil’s resolve against his desires loosened before unravelling entirely.

He strode unusually powerfully across the floor, his body blocking you and your pacing in your tracks. His proximity startled you, but as his hands came to gently held your shoulders you realised how tense your body had accidentally become.  Taking a deep breath as best you could with the biggest crush you’d ever had standing right in front of you, you slowly began to calm down. It was just a stupid prank, there was really no reason to get worked up to that extent, or anywhere near it. 

Your thoughts drifted from the circumstances you were currently trapped in however, supplanted by the feel of Wonpil’s touch, and the way his eyes met yours. His eyes were so pretty you felt yourself sink head over heels in them whenever you accidentally made contact. And the emotion that filled them to the brim at that moment and let them glimmer even more than normal in the radiant sunlight caught you even further off guard. You’d seen it a lot, even in large doses, and how it made him look even softer, even more adorable, made you almost spill words from between your lips. However like this, you could barely handle it. 

“Sorry,” you said, willing your voice to remain stable unlike your heartbeat.

“No, don’t be sorry! We’ll get...” It felt like he didn’t want to end his sentence but forced himself to. “So, they’re all in on this?”

His hands fell away from you, just as you looked away from him, unable to catch your breath otherwise. As it turned out it was a lucky move at the right moment. “Yeah, it seems so. N-now why? That’s the question. I don’t know, but what I do know is—”

Having pulled away, you’d begun to walk back to the door, thinking up the words to perhaps call out and talk them into freeing the two of you. Though as you did, your peripheral caught the odd transformation your closet door had done.

After performing a ridiculously overplayed doubletake that would have appeared to any onlookers out of context as fake, you noticed that there was a nearly full-sized image of a deep chestnut archway with the poor illusion (due to the angle) of a small opening inside. Drawing nearer you were able to make out a speckled grate suspended in the right wall of the wooden box.

What the image printed over three sheets of paper was sprung to your head immediately, much alike the jigsaw pieces jumbled in your head slotted together. 

It was a confession chamber. 

You had to confess, but not to a priest.  To Wonpil.

“God works in mysterious ways...” you remembered from the previous day, uttering the words as you replayed them in your mind. “Jae, you shit.”

Wonpil came to your side, peering round to take in your features, searching for an explanation in the sheer beauty he always found there. “What’s wrong?”

“I know how to open the door!” you announced proudly, the sense of victory washing away as you came face to face with what you had to do however. 

Wonpil’s characteristic sunny smile rose to his cheeks, all while you sat there barely able to stomach your anxiety. “Yay! What do we have to do?”

You didn’t know how to go about it. You didn’t know whether to tell him, to ramble, to keep it simple, or to just kiss him like you wanted to for however long it had been. “Confess,” was all that tumbled from your mouth, and you immediately regretted speaking at all.

The subject of your affections stood as silently as you did before him. You could see the rush of thoughts in his head, his cheeks flushing as he finally spoke up, “Confess our... sins?”

“Not sins, no...”

It was at that moment you realised your feelings were mutual. He wouldn’t look you in the eye like he always did, he was skipping over the obvious conclusion,and he wasn’t drastically denying a single thing. He didn’t run, nor hide, in fact he leant towards you. It was only a fraction of an angle, but with a small bite of his lip the air fled your lungs.

“Do you...” you breathed, taking a tiniest step towards him—you’d been so close already, but now he was practically against you, just not quite—as your fingers twitched at your sides, “do you want me to do it?”

His nod was strong compared to his voice which was so delicate, as if he couldn’t believe what was unfurling before him. “Please!” 

With his encouragement you let those ready fingers ease up to the edge of his jaw, gracing the fine stubble there as you sank you palms against his cheeks and held your dreams in your hands. “Wonpil, I’ve liked you for so long... I fell for you, more than anyone I’ve ever met before. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”

“Don’t say sorry, I didn’t tell you either,” he reminded with a chuckle, his dark eyes bright and shining and wide at you coming ever closer, “and not being near you makes my heart ache so please, just kiss me and make it stop forever.”

You didn’t have to be asked twice.

His hands barely had enough time to snake around your neck as you bridged the gap and let your lips meet at last. And it was like the whole world sighed in relief. 

His lips were so warm, the softness etched with all his thoughts and his moments of anxiety and sadness. You wanted to kiss them all away, so that the only ones remained were the ones out of happiness, out of his smiles and playfulness. 

It had been so long since you’d began dreaming of this moment, and now it was at last happening you never wanted it to end. But it had to end, and though you felt more than ready to deepen it, there was a click from the door behind you. 

Springing away from each other in surprise, you immediately both looked over to the origin of the sound, your hands meeting in place of your lips.

“It worked?” Wonpil asked the air more so than you, his free fingers extending to the handle tentatively. 

You drew to him, letting go of his hand to place your own on his shoulders a you peered over them. “I think it did!”

Taking a quick glance at you, he twisted the brass and pulled gently, his jaw dropping as a gap formed.

You were free. Though a small part of you was disappointed, probably completely interested in staying in close proximity to your crush without disturbances for as long as possible.

Except he was no longer your crush! Your heart lurched as the awareness dawned on you. Completely disregarding the situation, you mumbled so only he could hear, “Does this mean you’re my boyfriend?”

Wonpil turned his attention back to you, giggling as he stroked your hair. “Of course dummy. Did I not convince you?” He squished your cheek. “We can do it again if it’ll help!”

You had to laugh, wanting to roll with his suggestion entirely, though seeing a shadow approach through the gap in the doorway you had to turn the offer down for now. “Real soon I promise!” After noting his pout that very nearly overwrote your decision in one fell swoop, you continued, “Not when the person who organised this is right outside.”

Your boyfriend threw his head over his shoulder to see a head duck out of sight. You watched as his eyes swept the room before falling intently on the bed—more specifically, the pillows. “Do you want revenge?”

Catching onto his idea and grinning at how childish and petty it would be—in context that the plan had actually worked—you didn’t hesitate, wanting to get a piece of that ‘divine intervention’ that had thrown your morning into disarray when he could have at least warned you.  Besides, it wasn’t like you could turn down a man so precious twice. It would be akin to heresy.

Grabbing both pillows you handed one to Wonpil and came to a halt by the ajar door. “Remember, play dirty when it comes to Jae. He deserves it.”

Sporting his characteristic sunny smile, your boyfriend let out what you had to discern was a cackle as he slipped through the door and led the charge. “You don’t have to tell me.”

A thwack resounded through the dorms from just outside your door and you had to stifle a laugh at the scream that followed.

Perhaps Wonpil didn’t need your help as you had admittedly first expected. 

But where was the fun in that.  

“I’m telling you we could’ve put the movie on the side of her wardrobe!” 

“And I’m telling you it wouldn’t have fit!”

“...You’re never lifting me again.”

You gathered your breath after your surprise revenge assault, sending Dowoon and Sungjin an incredulous look as you passed. Clearly not all your deductions had been correct. Oh well, things had still played out correctly, and catching sight of Younghyun bringing your boyfriend into a side hug as he gushed about how you managed to save them both—clearly playing up the drama but hey, who were you to stop him, you had no qualms with being a knight in shining armour—made a proud blush rise to your cheeks.

Coming further into the living room, you intercepted Jae who had returned from your room after clearing everything up all by himself as you’d ordered.

“I still have no idea why you made me do all that!” he protested as soon as he caught your eye. “This had nothing to do with me! It was, hundred percent, Dowoon. Just Dowoon. He got sick and tired of your pining and...”

You folded your arms, expression proving just how much you didn’t believe his bullshit. 

“You don’t believe me!” he exclaimed, hands flapping. “What have I done to deserve this! Am I not a good friend? Loyal? Like a brother—”

You sighed, shaking your head as you walked over to him, before slipping your arms quickly around his chest. He was startled by the sudden display of affection, but hugged you back nevertheless. “Of course I don’t,” you chuckled, “but we wouldn’t be friends if I did.”

He scoffed at your words, but tightened his arms around you with a smile. He couldn’t have felt prouder in that moment, especially with Younghyun being dragged by Wonpil out of the room [to head out and fetch groceries?] who was delightedly babbling about how soft his best friend felt to cuddle with for real this time. Sungjin meanwhile rolled his eyes at the exchange, padding away and back to the kitchen. 

“Ok this means I can ask what made you work it out.”

You sputtered, though immediately gave in. “The confession chamber on the closet.”

“Ahh that was a good one,” he sighed happily, only to change tact soon after as the realisation sunk in, “wait that wasn’t even mine!” You laughed against him, you head tipping back as he searched the room for the true culprit. “Dowoon was that yours?”

You didn’t hear an answer, though hearing the curse that fell from Jae’s mouth offered enough indication to know that the response was in some shape or form affirmative. 

Laughter bubbling away into the air, you slowly pulled yourself away from the friend that had practically become an older brother to you. He let you go smoothly, but before you parted from him fully, you stood on your toes and whispered, “Thank you,” a smile on your face that was almost as bright as the ones Wonpil always received.

He sent you a grin, followed by a wink, as you followed after your new boyfriend. Leaning so he could see round the corner, he laughed quietly at how you subtly shoved the other man out of the way so you could take Wonpil’s side. 

His heart swelled as your hands naturally found each other’s, linking as if you’d been together for years. It came with a side of a dull ache, as that was what he wanted for himself too.

He wasn’t dismayed for long however. You now owed him after all, and you were well aware of it.

He couldn’t wait to see what you’d come up with. 

~~~

AN: no one can stop me from referencing my own work lmao

also a blackadder reference for anyone who knows!

also in germany there is actually an H note apparently so... fun fact.

Masterlist

[shreddedparchment]

Of Two Minds Pt.03

You’re Both Mine

05/08/2019                    Support Me on Ko-fi

Pairing: Bucky x Reader x Steve          Word Count: 5,297

Masterpost     Warnings: light smut, touching, groping, kissing, language, minor violence, angst

A/N: I decided to keep this one somewhat short so that I could just focus on Bucky’s reaction to the reader’s question from the previous chapter. I hope you all like it. I had quite a bit of fun with this one. As always, if you happen to reblog, thanks so much for helping me spread my work! xoxo P.S. Let me know what your favorite part/s are! I love knowing exactly what you all enjoyed.

The sickening crunch as Bucky’s right fist smashes against Steve’s nose is stomach churning.

“No!” You scramble forward, shoving yourself between them as Steve tumbles back. He’s hunched over and it gives you a good angle to pull away his hands to look at his nose and are glad to see that he’s not bleeding. “You’re okay.”

It’s almost an exclamation of relief.

“Get out of his way, Y/N.” Steve tries to scoop you out of the way, his hands gentle on your hips and his touching you seems to anger Bucky more.

He lunges forward and you turn to place your hands on his chest, moving towards him to keep him away from Steve.

“Bucky, please.” Bucky’s hands grip your hips hard. He looks down at you, staring into your eyes, searching for something.

What he finds, what you’re feeling, is nothing but love and fear. You don’t want to lose Bucky. You love him. So much. Unbearably. You reach up and place your hands on the sides of his face.

“I’m sorry. I should have stopped him, and I didn’t. I-I didn’t want to.” You admit and you can see the flicker of pain flash across his face. “Oh, Bucky, I’m sorry. I just-”

Bucky’s eyes zoom in over your head again, finding Steve where he’s standing as still as he possibly can.

“I shouldn’t have tried anything.” Steve’s even tone offers. “I’m sorry, too.”

Bucky flexes his jaw, and you drop your hands down along the sides of his neck.

You let the silence stand, allowing whatever emotions or unsaid words passing between Bucky and Steve to be said.

They’re quiet for so long, heavy breathing, rising wide shoulders only to fall with sigh after sigh. Because you don’t know what else to do with yourself, you hug Bucky. You wrap your arms around him around his chest, your hands splayed along his back as the searing silence continues.

Laying your cheek against his chest, you shut your eyes and focus on his heart. It’s beating wildly. Hard. The longer the silence lasts, the steadier it becomes until finally it settles into his resting rate. A smooth thump, thump, thump, so familiar now from laying on his naked chest, every night since the moment the two of you had come together.

Now that he’s calm, you lean back to look at him and find him still staring at Steve, but his expression is different. His fury is gone. He’s staring at Steve with a mixture of wonder and regret.

“Steve?” You finally speak, your voice light and careful.

He shifts behind you and you let Bucky go, letting your hand trail along his metal arm until your hand can grab his. You find Steve staring, worried. His storm blue eyes full of trepidation. Reluctantly you move to Steve, Bucky doesn’t let you go. He moves with you, tethered by your hand.

You reach with your left hand to caress the side of Steve’s face and hear Bucky’s slow intake of breath and then his slow release.

“Can you give me and Bucky some time?” You ask, taking your hand back and chastising yourself for giving in to the sorrow in Steve’s eyes. “We just need a minute.”

“Yeah.” Steve nods, his eyes shifting up to Bucky. “Of course.”

It’s like your heart is torn in two as he leaves. Half of it following after him to comfort him not only for the hit he took but for the reality of the situation that welcomed the two of you here at home.

He disappears into his bedroom and you finally turn back to Bucky. He’s still watching after Steve but with him gone now, you look down at his right hand. You reach of it and your touch brings his attention back to you.

He blinks, the small confused pucker between his eyes unbearably adorable—as always. His knuckles are red but otherwise there’s no sign of his having punched Steve.

“I wish you hadn’t punched him.” You sigh and then pull him towards the sofa of the small living room attached to the floor the three of you live on. You sit first and then pull him down next to you.

“He touched you.” Bucky explains and you nod because he has a right to be angry. You’d hoped to break things to him slowly, but he started asking questions so quickly that your lips just spilled all their secrets.

~~~~~~~~~~

“My Steve?!” He asks again, slightly shouting.

You turn startled eyes on the hangar crew and they glance towards the two of you with interest.

“Shh, Bucky.” You reach down and take his hand and pull him towards the elevator. You push the button and turn to look at his disbelieving face.

“You’re not joking?”

“Bucky…I know that this isn’t exactly normal. And before you make up your mind, I’d really like the chance to explain. Will you let me explain?” You plead, worried that he might get so angry that he’ll break up with you immediately and you can’t have that. You would die. Now that you’ve had him, how can you live without him?

The elevator dings and the doors open. The two of you move in. He waits until the door is shut, silver blue eyes sharp and calculating as he thinks fast and hard. You can almost see the cogs in his head turning.

“Bucky?” You probe, careful to keep your tone gentle and free of fear but a little seeps in there anyway.

“You love Steve?” He asks, turning towards you with a deeply furrowed brow. Confusion like this you’ve never seen. Not on Bucky.

“Yes.” You confess, your voice weakened by the strain of the emotions coursing through you. “I do. So much, Bucky. Almost as much as I love you.”

“Why now?” He demands, pointing down at the ground with his metal finger. “Why are you asking me for this now?”

“You-You don’t mind it?” The spark of relief is small and dull at the idea that he’s not demanding to know how you can possibly ask him to share you but rather why you’re asking him for it now.

“Why now, Y/N? Why not when we started dating?” He asks, his voice stern, all Sergeant, no Bucky.

“I-Something happened while we were on mission.” You admit.

“What happened while you were on mission?”

You blink, startled as he takes several steps towards you until you’re pressed against the wall, the bar of the elevator digging into the small of your back.

“What happened, Y/N?” He demands, his wide chest heaving up and down as he breathes deep and long through his nose.

“Steve saw that I wasn’t sleeping well, and he asked me what was wrong, and I told him that I missed you, that I’d gotten used to sleeping beside you but that wasn’t the only thing bothering me because he’s been acting so different lately like not talking to me and avoiding being alone with me and he just wasn’t being the Steve that I know and we’ve been friends for so long so I asked him what was bothering him and he-”

“What happened?!” Bucky nearly shouts, his voice high, his hands tight around your biceps as he gives you a small shake.

You flinch, knowing that once you say it you can never take it back and you might lose him and fuck you and fuck Steve for doing this to him. You’re shit and you deserve to lose him and be miserable without him because you’re a terrible person and you deserve all the bad things in the world.

You blurt out. “He told me he loved me. And I said it back. He said he knew that he shouldn’t, but he does, and I know that shouldn’t but I do.”

Bucky releases a held breath, a gasp of shock. “Right…”

You watch his face as he flashes through anger and then pain before settling on relief.

“Okay.” He whispers, rubbing your arms from bicep to elbow slowly. “That’s not as bad as I-”

“Then he kissed me.”

“What?” Cold blue meets your eyes.

“And I kissed him back. He’d-It’s not an excuse, Bucky. He had a nightmare and I tried to comfort him, and we were both so thrown by the confessions that we both just-”

“He kissed you in bed?” Bucky asks, his voice sorrowful, hitched, and breathy.

“Yes.” You whisper, reaching for him now, gripping the back of his t-shirt just above the curve of his waist.

“Is that all that happened?” He asks, his voice strained with fear now, edging towards grief. “Just a kiss?”

You can’t do this to him. You shouldn’t. You should apologize and grovel and tell him that he’s the only man that you love but…You see Steve’s shaking form just after his nightmare. You see the longing in his blue eyes and know that the longing is not one-sided. You see the ennui and the heartbreak etched across his face and you know you can’t abandon him now.

“No.” You almost sob and look down at his chest. “We-We didn’t have sex but we…He was on top of me and he—we went through the motions, Bucky but he didn’t-”

This is so difficult! How do you tell your boyfriend that you and his best friend dry humped because as much as you wanted to sleep with him you also couldn’t because he was waiting for you at home?

“I was nearly naked and so was he and-” You scream as his metal hand suddenly slams into the metal wall on the side of your head, your hands rushing to cover your mouth in surprise.

Almost like it’s fate, the elevator dings, and the doors open on your floor and you can see Steve pacing the living room in worry.

Bucky spots him and like a freight train he stomps towards his best friend and his fist flies.

~~~~~~~~~~

He releases your hand, turning himself so that he’s facing the TV head on. He shoves his hands into his pockets, telling you without words that you are to keep your hands to yourself.

As much as that breaks your heart, you get it. But you’re also not going to let him build a wall between the two of you. You scoot closer, lifting your leg up onto the seat so that you can turn to face him. You grab his elbow and stroke the cool metal.

“I’m so sorry, Bucky. I-”

“You said you were going to explain.” He begins, interrupting you quickly but not harshly. “So, explain.”

Shit, this is your chance but…where do you even start?

“Oh um…okay I…You know that I’ve known Steve a long time.”

He nods, not looking at you.

“From the very beginning almost. He was pulled from the ice and I joined the Avengers just after the Chitauri invaded New York. He trained me. He taught me almost everything I know, and he and I became friends. Good, very good friends.” You smile, the friendship between you and Steve has been a long one and it’s been a good one until recently. “I haven’t told you this yet because we-well you and I didn’t exactly get along at the beginning despite the fact that I loved you almost from the moment I saw you, but I don’t have the happiest home life. I won’t talk about that now because that’s not what this is about, and I don’t want to…I don’t know…influence you but Steve found out about what happened to me and he helped me through it.

“Steve taught me how to be strong even when it felt almost impossible to be so. He taught me how to laugh and how to cry and how to accept the challenges that life threw at me, learn from them, and overcome them. If it wasn’t for Steve I-I probably wouldn’t be here. Not because I lived for him or anything but because he taught me how to live for myself.”

Bucky’s eyes drift down towards the coffee table, Steve’s phone still sitting there. He gets a message and the screen lights up to show a picture of you and Bucky. Bucky’s arms around you, and you settled between them with your head on his shoulder. Both of you look happy.

Bucky sighs as the screen shuts off.

“The point I’m trying to make is that Steve became very important to me as a friend. He was someone that I depended on daily and I think I became that for him to. We were each other’s escape from the battles of our daily lives and in that friendship, we found a little peace. So, when I began to feel more than friendship for him, it scared me.

“Not only that but it also dawned on me that Steve could never like me in that way. He knew too much. He’s seen me at my worst and from his behavior alone, he can’t possibly feel like that for me, so I-I buried it. I made myself forget that I loved him because how could I take the chance of losing what had taken us so many years to build just to see if it might work?”

“But you were wrong.” Bucky realizes. “He did like you?”

You lick your lips, “Yes. He was scared like I was to hurt what we had so he also kept it to himself.”

Bucky scoffs, a bitter smirk on his lips as he shakes his head and leans back against the couch. “Typical Steve.”

“Then you came into my life…” Bucky turns to look at you, his eyes searching and what he finds is warmth and adoration. “And you changed me. By the time you came into my life, I’d already made myself forget Steve. I’d accepted that he and I would never be more than friends so imagine my shock when you showed up out of nowhere and changed everything.”

“That’s just because you didn’t see me when I was the Winter Soldier.” He tells you quietly, nervous for some reason.

“True.” You smile, “Steve made sure to keep me as far away from him and you during that whole ordeal. Even the Accords. He literally tied me up and locked me in a closet while he ran around trying to clear your name.”

“That should have given him away.” Bucky tells you. “The punk always did go overboard for the people he loves.”

“Maybe.” You nod. “But then you came to live with us, and I knew nothing would ever be the same. And now I finally have you.”

You lean to your right onto the back of the couch and forward until your forehead meets Bucky’s temple.

“And I don’t want to lose you, Bucky but what Steve and I have…what we didn’t know we had-”

“This is a lot.” Bucky admits.

“Too much?” You lean back and look at him, desperate for any sign of hope.

“I don’t know.” He sighs. “I mean, how would this even work? You date me every other day of the week and Steve gets you on the other days?”

You relax a little but not completely. At least he’s talking about it.

“No. I don’t think so. I suppose it’s something we’d have to figure out as we go. We could all share one room?” Though you know there’s no chance.

Bucky scoffs, proving you right.

“Or not.” You reach out to take his metal hand, slipping your fingers into his open hand as it rests on his thigh. He closes his own fingers around yours. “My mind is spinning, Bucky. I don’t know how to go about this any more than you do. What I do know is that if I could have stood to lose one of you then I wouldn’t even be bringing this up. I told you that this was the most selfish thing I would ask you to do and I’m asking because I can’t stand to lose either of you. I can imagine the way you must be feeling because if it had been you asking me to share you with someone I would have gone out of my mind with jealousy.”

“I-I am jealous, Y/N. You’re mine.” He looks at you, his steel blues boring into yours fiery hot as he claims you. “You’re my girl.”

“I always will be.” You assure him.

“But you want me to share you?” He asks, voice rising in pitch with the end of his question.

“I know I’m being unreasonable Bucky. I’m sorry.”

“It was that stupid kiss he gave you, wasn’t it? In his office? To make me jealous to get me to ask you out?” He sighs, shaking his head. “If I’d just asked you out without needing his push then we wouldn’t be here.”

“I doubt this could have been avoided for long. Even though I wasn’t actively looking to be with Steve, I still loved him, Bucky. I’d just given up hope. And he clearly felt the same way. I think it might have exploded at some point or another anyway.” You watch as he lifts your hand to his chest, pressing it against the spot over his heart, massaging the back of your hand with his metal fingers.

“What if I tell you no?” He turns to you, resting his head on the top of the sofa. “What if I say that I can’t share you and I won’t do it?”

You bite your lip hard because you’re going to have to say what you knew from the moment that Steve told you he loved you and you realized that you did too.

“Then I leave.”

“What?!” Bucky’s head shoots up. “What do you mean, you’ll leave?”

“Bucky, if I can’t have you…I’m empty. If I can’t have Steve, then I have no joy. I can’t imagine my life without you, and I can’t picture Steve getting over me. I don’t want him to. He’s mine.” You growl. “Like you are.”

He blinks, startled by the voracity of your claiming. Your hand is a possessive claw on the fabric of his shirt over his chest. He smooths it out, tracing the shape of your knuckles as he stares at the intensity in your eyes.

“You’re a minx.” He whispers, some of the warmth of his love back in his eyes.

“I’m sorry.” And you really are. You wish that Bucky was your one and only, but he is part of a pair now. A pair of hearts that you don’t want to break. A pair of hearts that you need for your own.

He sits up, dragging you up with him. He strokes your hand on his chest, staring at Steve’s phone until he nods. “I’ll need to think about it. I can’t just make a choice right now. I need time.”

“How much time?” You wonder, worried that this might be his way of delaying until he can pull away from you entirely to eliminate himself from the situation.

“I don’t know. A few days? Can you give me time?”

You’re so surprised and relieved that he’s considering this at all that you nod enthusiastically and lean in to kiss his cheek. As you pull back, he turns to look at you, wrapping his left arm around you to hold the back of your head as he pulls you in for a long languid kiss.

Ecstatic, you kiss him back enthusiastically, your lips moving against his own hungrily. It’s not until he’s pulling back and then bringing his right thumb up to trace the shape of your bottom lip that you realize he might very well be kissing you goodbye. What if chooses he can’t do this?

“I’m going to bed.” Bucky rises and you follow, clinging to his hand as long as you can.

“So early?”

“It’s almost nine. And I wanna go for a long run in the morning.” He pulls from you grip but only to caress the right side of your head as he leans in to kiss you again, another peck. Once again, he traces your lip, licking his own as if memorizing your taste. “Good night, baby doll.”

“Goodnight.” You whisper.

Bucky leans down and grabs Steve’s phone before holding it out to you. “You should take this to him. He won’t come out after I punched him. And-”

His hesitation worries you, but you take the phone.

“-you should spend tonight with Steve.” Bucky finishes, looking you straight in the eyes. “I’ll have my headphones in so…Goodnight.”

He leans in and kisses your cheek then turns and leaves you alone in the living room, disappearing into his own room that had recently very much become yours too. And though you should be happy that he’s telling you to spend the night with Steve, you’re not sure if he’s telling you because he knows he’s going to tell you he can’t do this sharing you thing or if he’s trying to see if he can handle it.

You click Steve’s phone on and stare at the picture of you and Bucky. Of course, Steve is going to have a picture of both you and Bucky. Even if he loves you, he loves Bucky too and you know that he’s so happy that Bucky is with you. He actively pushed the two of you together.

It kills you that for the sake of his two best friends, he was willing to wallow in misery for a while until he could get over you. If he could. You clearly couldn’t.

You knock on his door, reaching up to straighten your hair and shirt even though he clearly saw you only an hour ago.

You hear slow heavy footsteps approach the door, a heavy sigh, and then he pulls it open and his eyes shine when they see you and not Bucky. He must have been expecting another confrontation.

“Y/N…” He gasps, smiling a little.

“Hey. Can I come in?”

He moves aside silently and shuts the door behind you.

You’ve been in this room so many times before. You’ve laid with Steve on that very bed, on those very dark red sheets. You’ve sat on his floor, listening to music, or finished reports together and yet, somehow, being here in his room now feels so different than it ever did before.

You move towards his bed and hesitate before you sit. Flashes of your night with Steve plague your brain. You want his weight on you again. You’d been so hungry for him, needing to feel him in the most intimate of ways but you couldn’t. Not with Bucky waiting at home.

Bucky…

He’d told you to spend the night with Steve. He’d mentioned his headphones. As if he’s expecting you to give in to your desire but you know you can’t. With things so up in the air, how can you do that to him? So, when Steve sits beside you, you hold his phone out for him.

“You left it in the living room.” You smile softly, worried, but hoping it’s hidden from him. “Bucky and I are your lock screen?”

It’s more of an observance than a question but Steve answers anyway. “Of course. You two are the most important people I know.”

“You love us both?” You wonder, knowing the answer.

“Yeah.” Steve holds the phone, patting the shiny black metal against his hand. “What-uh…what did he say?”

You breathe in deeply, gathering your thoughts to determine what exactly you might say to Steve.

“He’s not sure he can share. I mean, it’s a terrible thing to ask him to do to begin with. I’m such a shit girlfriend.” You kick at the carpet, your boot catching.

“No, you’re not. You didn’t even kiss me at first. I was the one-”

“No, you weren’t, Steve. What happened was both our fault. I wanted you. I still want you.” You admit, leaning towards him. You slide your hand along the soft mattress until your fingers can lay atop of his. The red sheets of his bed are smooth against your skin and cool to the touch from the air-conditioned compound.

“Y/N…” Steve’s voice shifts, husky and wanting. It fills your heart with burning passion, scorching. So strong it nearly chokes you, but you swallow as he leans in towards you to rest his forehead against your own.

You shut your eyes. Praying for restraint.

“But…I can’t, Steve.” You sigh, tearing your eyes open to look into his beseeching blues. “I love him, and I love you. As much as I want you inside me…”

Steve’s eyes blaze and his hands turn into vices along the soft flesh of your hips. He pulls you up, yanking your leg up and over his own until you’re straddled in his lap and both of you are breathing heavily. Your bosom pressed against his chest, rising and falling, pushing and aching as you both nearly hyperventilate with desire. His hands trace the round shape of your bottom, squeezing to make you gasp.

“Stop…please, Stevie.” You’ve never called him that before and you’re not sure if it’s the name or the agony in your voice that makes him stop, but his hands freeze on your butt. He leans forward, resting his forehead against your clavicle.

“You shouldn’t say things like that.” Steve whispers then looks up into your eyes, your face only inches from his. He cups your chin on either side of your face his middle and forefingers tracing the shape of your ears. “It makes it harder.”

“I know.” You give his nose a long look. Bucky’s punch must have not been very hard or maybe his nose had just healed from the punch already, but it looks perfect again. You lean forward and kiss the tip. Sorry that he was hit. “I’m sorry. But I can’t do this until I know where he stands, Steve.”

“I know.” He agrees, pulling you down however to kiss you softly.

Your eyebrows shoot up, his lips soft and warm, the gentle stroke of his tongue not demanding but tentative. He’s getting a taste. Nothing more. He pulls back with a quiet smack and you wrap your arms around his neck.

“What else did he say?”

You tell Steve everything that you told Bucky. Everything that you know to be true about how Steve feels and about how long you’d wanted him before you gave up. About the way you met and about the way your friendship with Steve had changed your life for the better and that you are a better person for having known him.

Steve’s hands constantly move along your back, up to your shoulders and down to your waist before finding their way back up to the sides of your faces to stroke your cheeks. You can see the desire to kiss you in his eyes but he’s trying very hard to hold back.

“Do you think…if I’d said something—if either of us had said something, that when Bucky came to live here that we’d be in this same situation?” Steve asks curiously, still stroking your ears.

“Yeah.” You admit. “What I feel for Bucky started growing the minute I met him.

Steve sighs heavily but smiles softly, leaning back more to get a better look at your face. “Then I get why he’s hesitating. I don’t think I’d have been ready to share you either.”

“I don’t think I could share either of you with any other girls.” You admit bashfully. “Which is shitty of me considering what I’m asking you both to do.”

“I love you, Y/N.” Steve says sternly, his deep even tone piercing your chest to make it flood with heat. “I don’t want any other girls.”

Yet. Is all you can think.

“I-I want to wait until after Bucky makes up his mind, Steve. If he can’t do this then like I told him, I’ll go. I’ll leave. I won’t be the reason the two of you stop being friends. I don’t want to be that girl.”

“No.” Steve sighs. “If Bucky can’t do it, then we won’t do it. You can stay with him and I’ll step aside.”

“I don’t want you to step aside, Steve. Do you really think that I could be happy with Bucky knowing that you feel this way? When I love you so much already?” As if to prove your point, you slide your hands into the hair on the back of his head and lean down to kiss him, hard.

You dip your tongue into his mouth, tasting him, loving him. Needing him.

His hands are all over you, harsh fistfuls of your bottom and then you’re laying on his bed, his body pressed down over yours, half on you, half off. He hooks his hand behind your right knee and wraps it around his waist and you let him push against you. Straining hard on against your core making you gasp.

You pull back, afraid to slip up. Afraid that you’ll give in because that’s all you want to do.

“Wait.” You’re breathless, heart pounding, sex aching for relief. You’re wet and wanting, and you’d give anything to get him naked, but you can’t!

More than that, you won’t.

He does as you ask, pulling back, his face scrunched briefly as he pushes off of you and struggles to compose himself. He fists the sheets by your shoulder, fighting the urge to fuck you.

“Sorry.” He whispers.

“No.” You sigh. “No, Steve. I just…”

“I know, Y/N. We need to wait. I get it. I don’t want to hurt him either.”

No matter that the two of you have already done that.

“Fuck, this is hard.” You growl.

“Give me a minute, I’ll calm down.” Steve argues.

“No.” You laugh, loud and breathy. “No, Steve I didn’t mean you’re hard I just—this situation that I’ve put us in is difficult.”

“Oh.” He smiles, then chuckles and strokes your face from temple to chin with his index finger, enjoying your smile. “Yeah.”

Steve throws himself off you to lay on his back beside you, still breathing heavily. It takes him a minute, but he manages to calm himself down.

“Can we just-” You take in a deep breath and look up at him. “Can we just lay here? Together?”

Steve smiles and nods. “Of course.”

He opens his arm for you, and you scoot in close, resting your head on his chest as he wraps you up in both arms. You slide your left leg between his, hooking yourself into his side securely as the two of you settle in.

“I’m sorry I took so long.” Steve says, low and slow. “I should have had the courage to tell you a long time ago how I felt about you.”

“Me too.” You nod.

You drift off to the steady sound of his heartbeat. The rhythmic thump, thump, thump, new. Lovely, but strange and so unlike Bucky’s. You rub the hard planes of his chest, and he squishes you into his side and both of you hope that Bucky can see himself doing this because if there’s one thing that you know it’s that you can no longer go back to the time when you and Steve weren’t able to do this.

You’re almost asleep when Steve sighs heavily, clearly struggling with something.

Eyes shooting open, you stroke his chest again and tighten your leg around him. “What is it, Steve?”

“I really wanna make love to you.” He confesses and the tumbles in your stomach make you nervous.

I shouldn’t want it…You think. But…please Bucky. Please, don’t make me choose. I can’t choose.

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[goldstonegolem64]

OK this chapter is going to be split into to parts because it is long Also because I lost  a weeks work  do to my lab top crapping the bed last minute.  Chapter 45- A Eye of the storm By Goldstonegolem64

Jay and Val watched as the coffin Slowly open. Then the door suddenly Burst open as a massive metal spiked ball flow out of it straight towards them .Jay Quickly moved the Valkyrie out of the way of the spike ball only to be meet by another spike ball that slammed into the Valkyrie’s chest sending them crashing into the muddy ground. 

“That hurt “ Jay said as he brought the Valkyrie back to her feet  as he notice that some of the screens in the cockpit had warning signs on them telling him about a surge of electricity  . Jay was about to ask what just happen  but before he could ask the earth beneath them began to shake “ Oh Shit VAL take to the sky!!” Jay yelled as Val took to the sky as the ground beneath them gave way as a massive red scaled spade headed Serpent it’s open maw was lined with razor sharp teeth. The serpent tried to bite down on the Valkyrie’s leg but missed. Jay notices as the serpent body twisted around so it didn’t  fall on it back he saw two metal arms across it’s body  the serpent hit the ground and disappeared back into the whole it came out of “ that was close and that robeast looked cool “jay said still looking at the hole the robeast disappeared in to 

“ in coming “ Val said as he moved the Valkyrie to the side avoiding another chained spike ball  followed up by her swinging the spear to knock the other one away “ Stay focused on the task at  hand we still have this one to take care of “

Jay looked toward were the spike ball came from and saw the three hundred foot  robeast standing next to the coffin it came out of. It’s arm’s and legs were mechanical. The body was hairless and showed of pale green skin it had no head but on the chest was a single brown eye and on the stomach was  mouth that was stitched close  .where the hand would be were two hole that had chains slowly being pulled into them.

“ ok not going to lie the serpent one  looks cool but god cyclopes over there is one ugly son of a bitch ” Jay said 

“ I agree with you on both of those points.” Val said as she charge towards the  one eyed robeast spear first.

As they did the cyclopes robeast raised it’s right  arms and fired off one of the  spike balls . Val  move to the side dodging out of the way of the attack. Followed by Val swinging the spear at the chain hoping to disarm their opponent. But after the spear made contacted with the chain a current  of electricity travelled up the spear causing a power surge throughout the Valkyries systems overloading them  causing the Valkyrie short circuit and hit the muddy ground

Jay franticly hit the manual power button a long with other buttons that could jump start the Valkyrie just in cause of sudden power failure. But sadly nothing was working. “   Come on come on Val wake up. “  Jay could feel the earth start to shake followed by the sound of emerging from the wet earth and what sounded like guttural laugh and hissing. Jay looked out the right eye of the Valkyrie and saw the cyclops robeast walking  toward them. “Come  on Valley get up I’m too young, have five child to raised and a relationship I’m trying to work on so I can’t die here.”  Then Jay saw a metal finger slowly covered the right eye followed by jay feeling like he was lifted into the air. Jay looked out the newly uncovered left eye and was meet with a yellow serpent eye looking at him. luckily  the glass that made up the Valkyrie’s eyes was one way. So Jay could look out but nothing could look in. After a few seconds of looking at a massive snake’s eye jay watched helplessly has he and the powerless Valkyrie was tossed into the air.”  This is bad this is very bad ‘ Jay watch as the Valkyrie slowly turned to face the serpent . Jay though the serpent was going to lung at him but he was wrong because the moment the Valkyrie was high enough in the air. A spike ball slammed into the Valkyrie sending it flying in a random direction 

The Valkyrie  clashed into the muddied ground an rolled a few feet after hitting the ground. Jay felt faint pain and very dizzy. Jay watched the world spine for a bit . he waited a few second for everything return to normal. As he did this the earth started to shake as the cyclopes and serpent robeasts moved towards them. “ Great Val please wake the hell up!” Jay yelled as he slammed his metal hand into the console. After that everything in the cockpit came back to life.” really that’s all it took”  Jay said as he grabbed on to the control sticks and got the Valkyrie back on it’s feet. “Val you still with me “

“ Yes I am my pilot sorry I disappear.”

“ It fine I was just tossed about like a rag doll. But enough about me lets kill this two shucks before the others show up .” jay said as he slammed his Bayard into the slot turned summoning the bow.  

“ I Agree lets” Val said as she pulled her left arm back creating the energy arrow and let it charge up and aimed towards the cyclopes 

The two robeasts seeing there down enemy get back up and pull out a new weapon. Both robeasts started booking it towards the Valkyrie. The cyclopes raised both it’s arms up into the air fired the spike balls into the air and furiously brought them down . While the serpent dive head first into the ground and started to tunnel towards it’s target. Val Jumped back right as the spike balls came crashing down where she was and as she move the serpent shot out of the ground right in front of the Valkyrie’s aiming recital 

“got yea” Val said 

“ Boom bitch !!” Jay yelled As Val let the arrow fly. The arrow punched through the top of the serpents head and flow through the air straight in to the cyclops’s eye then exploded blowing a hug hole in the robeast this sending yellow blood and a purple liquid to fall with the rain.

 Both robeasts fell to the ground lifeless leaving only the rain and thunder .The Valkyrie fell to one knee using the bow as crouch. “ ok Val damage report “

“ Most of are back up power is spent by that power surge and after that hit and the fall. we can’t change for a few minutes and any miner damage is being put on the back burner to focus on the repairing are t-cog as well are retightening are joints .” 

“Good to know. Now where are the other?”  Jay said as he look at the at the motion scanner as he did this the motion sensors picked up three objects that were moving towards them from the mountain range “We have in bound “ Jay said as the valkyier got back to its feet 

The valkyier turned to face this new foes as they jumped down from the mountains . Two looked the same. Both had most of their body replace with machinery the only thing that was organic was the heads. They both had a huge lower jaw with tusks shooting out of it, three eyes and pointed ears . Do to how dark was outside  jay couldn’t tell what color there skin or eyes  were but that was besides the point. The one wielded a massive claymore with a bright  glowing outline surrounding it. the other had two hand axes.

Behind them still climbing from the mountain was a mix between a Spider and a tank it moved on eight mechanical leg on it’s back sat a cannon. on the underbelly was what looked like a chain gun. it’s head was a massive glass dome with a red eye that moved around looking at everything in the area. It’s body was heavily armored. It moved slowly down the mountain. As it spotted the Valkyrie a helmet closed around the head .It let out a loud low Basie mechanical roar Then it’s chain gun and along with other unforeseen guns appeared on the spider tanks body and started opening fire 

“Shit “ Jay said as Val closed the wings around them to defend from the onslaught of slugs and plasma bolts. the onslaught slowly started pushing the Valkyrie backwards “Ok this is bad. What is are plan here Val”  Jay asked 

“I Don’t have one. “ Val replied 

“ Ok that’s not good.” Jay turned on the comm” Hey guys a little help would be nice” 

“ Sorry kid the storm picked up over here and it’s making near impossible to get are fighters off the ground.  But  reinforcements are on there  towards you so just hold out just a bit longer alright” Isara said 

“Been doing that” Jay replied as he turned off the comms “ Well we just need to hold out for a bit longer bud”  Jay said as the sound of gun fire stopped. 

Val parted to the wings to see what was going on and saw the spider tank standing there looking at them. It took both jay and Val a few moment to realize what  was about to happen.  Val suddenly stood up and spun around using her  bladed wings to parry multiply strikes from both of the smaller robeasts. As she used her wing to block the strikes Jay removed his Bayard from the key slot and summoned the spear 

The Valkyrie held it’s own against the two robeasts. But she was slowly being over whelmed by the robeast brothers assault. An as the twin robeast fought the Valkyrie the Spider tank started charging up it’s main cannon and started targeting the Valkyrie waiting for an opening.  Val brought up the spear to block the Dual axes only to have the other robeasts claymore slam into the Valkyries chest sending flying back as well as leaving visible black slash mark a cross the golden chest plate of the Valkyrie. The Valkyrie hit the ground hard  and tumbled for a bit then stopped .The Valkyrie slowly got up back on its feet use the spear as a crutch  

“Ok that hurt “Jay said as he clutched his chest in the same area where the scorch mark was.  Then he noticed a bright  red light in the profiteroles “ Oh that’s not good “Jay turned the Valkyrie turned to Face the spider tank and the color drain from his face as he saw the spider tank’s cannon pointed right at them 

“We’ve been locked on to” Val yelled as the robeast fire of it’s main cannon. The bright red beam shot screamed across the area straight towards the injured Valkyrie . Val had no time to Counter or move out of the way.  Both Jay and Val thought this was going to be the end of both of them until something slammed into them knocking out of the way of the blast. Followed by a bright light that nearly blighted jay after a few second of letting his helmet to Adjust itself to let him see and what he saw put a smile on his face 

“ Sorry were late “Ryner said over the comms as one of the four cubes was absorbing the red beam them fired it back at the spider tank the fired back beam slammed into and explode causing the spider tank’s to fall to the ground. Jay Assumed it was stunned at the moment. “ We will handle the big one you handle the smaller two 

“ Alright just let me catch my breath   “ Jay replied as the other three cube followed by small version of them followed behind as well as the green lion. “ Hey Pidge status up date on the others are they coming or what ?” 

“ I couldn’t contact anyone do to the storm ramping up messing with the signal. So I left it to beau and the slayers to try and contact the others your turn” pidge said 

“ I’ve seen five  killed two“ pointing at the serpent and the cyclopes “currently fight three “ pointing to the brothers grim and the spider tank that had turned back on and started getting up. “ Haven’t seen six yet,”   Jay said as he brought the Valkyrie back on to her feet” you ready Val  “ Jay asked 

“ Yes I am my pilot let’s finish this “ Val said as the wing engines flared to life and charged forwards towards the two robeasts

Else where miles Away 

A lone robeast flowed in mid air above the planets ocean watched the battle unfold. The robeasts was as tall as Voltron and was build from a scrape prototype version of Zarkon’s personal robeast he was going to use to fight both The Valkyrie and Voltron. It’s had two tesla on there back and massive wind tribune in it’s chest It’s pilot Root rot sat there not happy with the out come of his plan. he hoped that the robeasts would have been able to at least attack the city and test out the cities defends but no the paladins had to be here. Why he didn’t know but it was just lucky for him that it was the two paladins he had face before .But then it brought up the question where are the other why would  there only be two paladins unless there was something else going on here.But he would get his answers after he conquered this world for Lady Haggar .As it stood there ten V-Type robeasts slowly came out of the cloud two were holding onto a  smaller coffin that was shacking violently “Status report “

“ The City seems to have three ships belonging to an organization called the queens slayers.”   One of the pilots said in a familiar voice 

“Alright they will be interrogated if we win this battle 

“  we have recaptured experiment 343 as you orders “ Ironwood said 

‘ Good now both of you return to the fleet I don’t want to loss  three of my best pawn just yet.” Root rot watched as Hemlock And Baron flow of with the coffin “ I was really hoping that we didn’t run into Voltron or the Valkyrie yet but still even the best laid plans are only good on paper. Now has for the rest of you once the Valkyrie, the green lion and those cube things finish off experiment 234a and 234b as well has experiment 673 you will Attack and Black thorn and Ironwood you stay back and only engage when the other fail”  Root rot turned on his comms “.Now Sub commander Eithren contacted Central command and tell them that something is going on here involving the Paladins “ Root Rot got nothing but static and could hear the faint sound of music playing but he put that up with the storm for the interferons ” Damn  this storm Still will tell them once the mission is done Now move out “   He yell at his subordinates as they all dispersed  

Back in the battle 

The Valkyrie now with the green lion helping them they were able to keep the brothers grim on the ropes as both robeast s were now trying to block a flurry of spear thrusts and plasma bolts from both mechs. But as the two robeasts push the two mechs back the Valkyrie and the green lion turned invisible and disappeared into the night .Both robeasts when back to back in a guarded position looking around the night sky but all they saw was a flash of red light then the nothing as their heads were removed from their bodies.

“Ok that was brutal even for us.” Pidge said as the green lion DE-cloaked along with the Valkyrie

“ Hey I made it quick and painless “ Jay said as the Valkyrie de summoned the Scythe and picked up the claymore.  “ now shot me at full forces “ Jay said as the Valkyrie closed its wings around them

“ Ok “ Pidge said as she powered up the green lions mouth cannon and fired 

The Valkyrie Counter the shoot and used it to boost it’s speed and rocketed towards the spider tank Claymore still in hand. The spider tank was to busy firing at the army of cube that were flying around it to notice the Valkyrie flying towards them. The Valkyrie flow close to the ground and raised the Claymore up ,Slammed it’ s feet on the ground and slid under the robeasts and used the claymore to cutting through the bottom of the robeasts. This caused as unforeseen chain reaction of internal explosions that caused the robeast to somewhat scream in pain as it’s body explode from all the ammo inside of it erupted .The Valkyrie quickly got out from under the robeasts as it collapsed and powered down 

“  Ok I wasn’t ready for that. I had this whole God of War execution planned out and it was going to look so damn cool. “ Jay said a little disappointed 

“Better luck next time my pilot” Val said as she dropped the claymore and used the fallen robeast and a seat so she can repair herself before the sixth and finally robeast appeared .

“Will find the last one so rest up for now “Ryner said as The cubes floated away into the surrounding areas to locate the last robeast  

“Way a

“  So how you two holding up ?”   Pidge asked as she landed next to the Valkyrie 

“ Been Better“Jay said

“ I have seen better days “Val said as she patted the green lions head. The lion purred a little

“ So do you think that the mission has been compromised?” Pidge asked 

“ Maybe I’ll head into orbit and look out for an warships that are nearby  and so you should head back to the city and help the others set up a stronger signal to tell the others about this.”   

“ Ok I’ll be back then “  pidge said as she took the green lion into the sky

But as she did that a Plasma Bolt Blow pass he And Slammed into the chest of the Valkyrie exploding on contacted knocking the Valkyrie out of it's sitting position. That was Followed up by another bolt Snipe the green lion in the side sending it to the ground . Then Came the Onslaught of purple plasma bolts Firing on the two downed Mechs. But the cubes moved into protect the two downed mechs. 

“Ok what the hell was that” Jay asked disoriented  as he brought the Valkyrie to it’s feet again 

“ We were shot my pilot “Val replied as she summoned back he spear 

“No Shit where from “Jay asked 

“Twenty yards northwest My pilot” Val replied as she turned towards where the shoots came from. 

What they saw was a semi forested area with rocks intertwined in there roots.They also spotted One of the copy Valkyrie’s using some of the rocks as cover. It popped out from it’s cover and started to open fire with a bigger version of a Galra plasma Rifle. Val quickly brought up there wings to block the shoot then pointed the spear at the area where the V-type  was and fired three shoots. The C-V quickly hide behind the Rock to cover itself from the bolts 

“ Hey Val do we still have that boost from before ?”  Jay asked 

“ Yes we do “ Val replied as she fired up her wings and flow straight toward where the V-type  was an thrust the spear through the rock and the V-type Back . The V-type went limp and do to it’s power sources being destroyed. As Val was  pulling the spear out of the  Two more appeared from behind a log and opened fire on then. Val let go of the spear and summoned up the Scythe  and charger at both of them. And with one swing the two V-types were cleaved in half. Val  landed and slid on the ground a few feet away from the destroyed V-types

“ Ok that “Jay was cut off as Val spun around Scythe in hand cutting through the legs off a V-Type that was trying to get the jump on them. The V-Type hit the ground do to it’s lack of legs as Val quickly took this chance to raise the scythe over her head and brought it down on to the V-types head. “ Ok is it over now?” Jay asked 

“ No we have two more two deal with “ Val replied as she pointe towards two more V-types  Rushing towards them as they fire their rifles as the Valkyrie.

Valkyrie used their wing to block the shoots and then ran towards the two V-types. As they ran The Valkyrie spun and throw the scythe at a vertical angel. The Scythe hit the V-type on the right in the Shoulder causing it to fall backwards. while it part near was still charging . As the Valkyrie and the V-type got closer the V-type tried to shoot the Valkyrie while it’ s were closed. This caused the bolt to bounce off it into the V-types left knee destroying it. This caused the V-type to stumble a bit . It raised it’s rifle again. But the Valkyrie’ s suddenly opened knocking The rifle to the side.This allowed the Valkyrie to grab the V-type's Head with one hand followed by Her bringing down her elbow caving in the head. Val tossed the now disabled V-type a side and walked over to the last one as she did they de-summoned the spear and the scythe and summoned up the Plasma pistol had gotten from one of V-types that worked under Skyver. As they walked the last V-type raised it’s rifle only for it to be shoot off of it’s hand by the Valkyrie. it then Tried to crawl backwards way only to have it’s leg stepped on by the Valkyrie. Valkyrie raised the plasma pistol and fired one shot into the V-type's Chest destroying it’s core . After a few minutes of silences the Valkyrie started walking out of the forest 

“ Now we are done my pilot “Val said . 

“ Ok that’s good to know “ Jay replied as he removed his helmet and whipped the sweat off his for head as the green lion flow towards them 

“ Nice work out there Junker “Pidge said smiling 

“ It was nothing just a normal days work pigeon “  jay replied

“  Yes fine work the both of you now let’s get back to the city an rest of a bit  “ Ryner said as the cubes started moving back to the city.

“ But what about the last robeast. I'm guessing those Copies were just the clean up crew if those thing had beaten us “ Pidge said 

“ Don’t worry about that you have us to deal with “ A voice which was a mixture of Shiro and Jays Voices 

“ Brother they have more pressing matter to a tend two” said a much younger sounding Jay

Then came the sound of two thing hitting the ground both the green lion and The Valkyrie turn to see two more V-types in there combat  forms  but this two looked more like the Valkyrie and the Halberd. One was red with a draconic look to it they wield a what looked like a long sword. While the other was Blue with a griffon look to it and had what looked like a chain blade.

“oh this is going to be trouble” Jay said as he summoned back Val’s spear

“ YEs it will be” Pidge replied as the green lion cloaked it’s 

[primatechnosynthpop]

I can't choose between "you should have said that yesterday" and "maybe in another world" soooo I'll let you decide :)

Hmm... what about... both? :3 (Since you didn't specify which characters to write about I'm just doing Hiro and Ando; they seem like a safe bet where you and I are concerned)

*

For a person with superhuman abilities, particularly one who has taken it upon himself to be a hero, it's amazing how quickly life can change. One day, you're having fun, and the next...

On Sunday morning, which thanks to differing time zones was evening for their Americans friends, Hiro and Ando were invited out for drinks at a bar in New York. Hiro was initially unsure if it would be responsible, since they had work the next day, but Ando talked him into it more easily than he would have liked to admit. (Ironically, when it was revealed that it was a karaoke bar, Hiro's enthusiasm increased while Ando's diminished.) Still, both of them had a great time, especially after a couple of drinks. Hiro even managed to talk Ando into singing a duet with him.

"Ohh, you're the best friend that I've ever had!" Hiro swayed slightly on his feet as he sang. "I've been with you such a long time, you're my sunshine..."

He leaned forward, tripping over his feet in the process; without missing a beat, Ando caught him and set him back on his feet while singing the next line of the song.

"And I want you to know that my feelings are true," he crooned, holding Hiro's gaze over the top of the microphone. "I really love you~"

Hiro's cheeks, already flushed from the alcohol, grew a darker shade when Ando batted his eyes at him. Giggling, he gave a playful swat at his friend's head, like a kitten batting at a piece of string, then turned to face the other bar patrons and struck a dramatic pose as he and Ando sang out in chorus: "Ohh, you're my best friend!"

When it was creeping up on 4 AM in eastern daylight time and the bar was closing, they bode a cheerful goodbye to their friends (all of whom were in varying stages of drunkenness) and Hiro teleported them back home. Although it was only mid-afternoon in Tokyo, Hiro was exhausted after such a raucous outing, and the two glasses of cherry wine he'd gulped down were beginning to churn most unpleasantly in his stomach and dull his higher senses. Groaning, he flopped facefirst onto his bed without even taking his shoes or jacket off. He probably would have immediately fallen asleep were it not for the sensation of Ando poking him in the side.

"Oi, Hiro, this is your bedroom."

"Mm? Yeah, it is," Hiro mumbled around the fabric of his pillowcase. "So what?"

"So, take me back to my own apartment before you fall asleep."

Hiro rolled over onto his side to face Ando, who was standing over him with his arms crossed. His expression was a mixture of frustration and bemusement. Hiro gave him a sleepy, half-lidded smile.

"It's not a problem," he said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "Just sleep here with me."

"What, like in your bed?" Ando shook his head. If he'd been thinking more clearly, Hiro might have better understood the strange look that came over his friend's face, or why he suddenly averted his eyes. "That's not happening."

"Don't sleep, then. Just go watch TV in the living room or something."

With that, Hiro rolled back over and closed his eyes. From behind him, he heard Ando sigh. A few seconds later, the weight of the bed shifted as Ando sat down next to him on the edge of the bed. He was silent for a moment before speaking up, his tone weary and almost vaguely wistful.

"That song we sang at karaoke tonight... apparently it's really about a married couple." For a moment, Hiro thought he felt something brush against his cheek, but when he opened his eyes and looked over his shoulder Ando had his hands folded in his lap and was fidgeting with them. "...Maybe in another world..."

"What?" Hiro asked, squinting in confusion. The cogs in his mind spun in an attempt to work out the meaning behind his friend's words, but those proverbial cogs were rusted from the alcohol in his system, and he had no idea what Ando was talking about. "You say strange things, Ando."

Ando laughed at that, and the bed's weight shifted again as he stood back up.

"Yeah, I guess I do," he said. "Good luck sleeping off the cherry wine, Hiro. I'll see you whenever you wake up."

*

The rest of Sunday afternoon and the following night passed in a haze. Hiro woke up at around 7 PM with a mild hangover and got up to make some instant ramen; he shared a bowl with Ando and they sat on the couch together watching reruns of an old shojo anime show until both of them fell back asleep.

When Monday morning rolled around, they were a little late getting into work. Hiro got into the shower first, and Ando yelled at him from outside to hurry up. They made each other turn around while they were getting dressed (Ando borrowed an outfit from Hiro, and it didn't fit him very well, but Hiro wasn't going to complain about the slight glimpse of midriff allowed by the hem of his top when Ando wore it). While heading out the door, Hiro stuffed a piece of toast into his mouth, and Ando joked that he looked just like the protagonist of the show they'd been watching the night before. They took the train across town to the office together, pressed snugly up against each other. With the alcohol out of his system and his mind clearer, Hiro was a bit flustered by their proximity, but somehow he found that he enjoyed it. There was something almost domestic about the whole situation, and for reasons he was currently unwilling to name, that brought him a thrill of excitement.

Kimiko arched an eyebrow at them when they arrived at Yamagato Industries, but she refrained from commenting. Hiro waved at his sister over his shoulder as he and Ando scurried down the halls to the Dial-A-Hero office. He let out a sigh of contentment as he slumped into the cushiony office chair at his desk. Ando pulled up his own office chair and took a glance at their answering machine to make sure they hadn't missed any calls before sitting down beside him.

"No calls?" Hiro asked, readying himself for the inevitable pang of disappointment that would be brought on by the response. As time went on, a few more people called to ask for their services, but they still only got one or two calls a day if they were lucky, and most of the jobs were small things that their clients just as easily could have called the fire department for.

"Actually, it looks like someone called us just a couple minutes ago," Ando said. He sounded surprised--understandable, considering the aforementioned rarity of people calling them. "But they didn't leave a message."

"Let's call them back," Hiro said, leaning eagerly across the desk to press the redial button on the answering machine. He lifted the phone off the hook and held it to his ear. It buzzed twice before someone picked up.

"Hello? Is this Dial-A-Hero? Oh, thank god you picked up!" The voice on the other end of the line sounded urgent; Hiro stiffened with alarm upon hearing shouting and what sounded like gunshots in the background. "Someone's robbing the bank! Quick, you have to stop them!"

"Who is it? What's happening?" Ando asked, leaning over to listen in on the conversation.

Hiro lowered the phone and put his hand over the mouthpiece to address his companion. "It's a bank robbery." Then, bringing the phone back up to his ear: "Where is the address? We'll be there in a moment!"

The person told them the address, and Hiro hung up the phone and grabbed his sword from where it was displayed on the wall. Putting his hand in Ando's, he squeezed his eyes shut and teleported them to the address their client had given.

Sure enough, there were three masked people standing in the middle of the bank, brandishing guns; two of them hung back while the third was aiming his weapon at the woman behind the bank counter. The other bank employees and customers were crouching down behind desks and teller machines, muttering anxiously amongst themselves. When Hiro and Ando appeared, gasps sprung up amongst the civilians; two of the robbers spun around to aim their weapons at them.

"Put down your guns and leave this building now," Hiro commanded, brandishing his sword with a stern glare. "Or my partner and I will--"

Before he could finish that thought, a rapid series of bangs rang out as the robbers fired their guns. The gasps and murmurs of the civilians broke into screams, and at his side, he heard Ando scream as well. Those sounds were abruptly cut off when Hiro froze time. Four bullets froze in midair, one of which was barely an inch away from Hiro's forehead. His heart skipped a beat at the sight of it; gulping, he lowered the bullet and then moved the other three out of his and Ando's way as well. He deposited the bullets into the trash can by the desk, where they found their place amidst a pile of crumpled receipts and candy wrappers. Then, brushing his hands off, he marched over to the robbers and pried the guns out of their hands. With the robbers unarmed, Hiro grabbed each of them in succession and teleported them to a police station, where he unfroze time and shoved the robbers toward the nearest officer.

"These men were robbing a bank," he said. "'Lock them up before they can hurt anybody else."

The police officer looked rather startled, as did the robbers, one of whom immediately spun around and tried to shoot Hiro with a gun that he no longer had. Hiro smirked, feeling quite pleased with himself as the officer looked the robbers up on their computer and announced that they had previously been charged for several counts of theft and attempted robbery. Leaving the police to take care of things, he teleported back to the bank to make sure everyone there was safe.

When he reappeared in the bank, he knew immediately that something was wrong, and it brought a sharp twisting sensation to his gut. The employees and customers who had previously been hiding were now clustered around the spot where Hiro and Ando had shown up, muttering things like "Oh my god" and "Is he going to be okay?!" Heart spiking with alarm, Hiro pushed past the gathered crowd to find Ando sprawled out on the ground, blood pooling around him. Hiro froze at the sight of his collapsed friend, blood running cold.

"Ando, what--what happened?!" he stammered, dropping to his knees and laying a hand atop the dark red stain on the front of his friend's borrowed shirt. "I stopped time before the bullets could hit us!"

"Before they could hit you," Ando corrected him, raising his head to meet Hiro's gaze. He spoke through gritted teeth, but he didn't sound angry so much as scared. "One of them had already hit me."

"What? No," Hiro whimpered, shaking his head.

It was a stupid thing to say, he knew, because the irrefutable evidence was laid out before his eyes, but... no! His mind refused to wrap itself around the fact that he, the master of time and space, had been too slow to stop the man he cared so deeply for from getting hurt. Ando must have understood that to some degree, because he didn't bother offering a retort. Sighing, he laid his head back down on the cold tile floor of the bank, while around them the civilians parted and he heard someone in the background talking about calling an ambulance.

Hands trembling, Hiro pushed up the bottom of Ando's shirt so he could see the injury. Sure enough, a bullet was embedded in his upper abdomen, exposing a grisly mess of blood and flesh that made Hiro gag. All the while, blood continued to pour from the wound, seeping between the tiles of the floor and soaking through Hiro's pant legs as he knelt beside his friend.

"You... you'll be okay," Hiro told him, and it came out sounding like a command. "You have to be okay!"

Ando began to open his mouth but then closed it again, as if changing his mind about what to say. He brought his hand up to lay it atop Hiro's, threading their fingers together, and gave him a sad smile.

"Hiro... I love you."

The words pierced through Hiro as though he were the one who'd just been shot. He understood the finality concealed behind that confession. And the worst part was that, now that he heard those words spoken aloud, only now could he put a name to the feelings that flared up in his heart whenever he was with Ando. The feelings he had harbored for years now. The feelings he had been too scared to acknowledge, for fear that they weren't reciprocated. And in that moment, when the palm of his hand was wet and sticky with Ando's slowly draining lifeblood, a jolt of misplaced anger surged through Hiro.

"You should have said that yesterday!" he blurted.

The melancholy expression on Ando's face didn't waver, even as a trickle of blood dribbled out the corner of his mouth. "What difference would it make?" he asked, words coming out slightly slurred as though it were still the day before and they were drunk and partying with their friends.

"Because if you told me then, I would have known what I felt, too," Hiro said, although he could barely choke the words out around the thick lump of emotion swelling in his throat. "And we could have taken today off so I could--I could kiss you, and--and we could date, and... and I never would have let you put yourself in danger again."

As he spoke, Ando's hand grew limp atop his own, and his skin gradually became cooler to the touch. That sad, regretful smile was still on his face when his eyes fell closed and his head lolled to the side. Cold, harsh dread clamped around Hiro's heart like the steel of a hunting trap closing around its prey, and he desperately grabbed his companion by the shoulders, lifting him off the ground.

"I love you, too!"

The confession was swallowed up by a sob that wracked Hiro's body, so he yelled it out again, and then over and over again as hot tears welled up in his eyes and poured down his cheeks.

"I love you, Ando. I've loved you for a long time. I should have told you... I love you, I love you, I love you!"

He rocked back and forth on his heels as he made his declarations, clutching his companion's unmoving body to his chest. But no matter how tightly he held Ando's body, no matter how passionately he cried out his feelings, Hiro knew it was too late. He had failed the man he loved, and now... and now...

Maybe in another world.

Ando's words from the previous day echoed in his mind, and now Hiro understood them. In another world--another timeline--if either of them had been bold enough to confess their love, they could have been together. Whether or not that would have changed the outcome of this day, Hiro didn't know. It didn't make a difference now anyway. In this world, he sat alone on a cold tiled floor, soaked through with the blood of the man he loved, with nothing to show for his love other than a lifeless body in his arms.

"I love you," he whispered through his tears one final time, just in case it would somehow make a difference or change what had happened.

It didn't.

[idyllicstarker]

If you’re still up for prompts, could you pretty please do sth like this: Peter and Tony are together for quite a while. Everything seems perfect but Tony keeps disappearing all the time. Peter thinks that Tony is cheating on him (I need the angst!!) but he’s actually preparing sth AMAZING for their anniversary 🌻💛

I’m always up for prompts so thank you! I hope you like it! It was my first time trying to write really angtsy stuff, so yeah!!

Warnings: ANGST, foul language, accusations of cheating, implied sexual content

Peter Parker had been asked many times, how he managed to put up with Tony Stark’s antics. Even the rest of the avengers, including Pepper and Rhodey wondered how Peter had in fact, not lost his mind over his relationship with the older man.

No one thought he would cheat. That wasn’t the case. Tony had a past track record, but the way he looked at Peter was too sincere to miss. Tony wouldn’t dare to do anything to this relationship. Apart from help it grow and thrive with the little things he did.

That became apparently obvious the moment the two got together. The way Tony looked at Peter could melt even the coldest of hearts. The love he felt for the boy was huge; if you couldn’t see it in his eyes, you saw it with the way he acted around him. Peter had turned Tony into a lovesick teenager all over again. Despite the age difference, they were more alike in that manner then you would think.

Peter swooned over the romantic streak Tony had. If it wasn’t presents like boxes of chocolate, it was flowers. Dates, amazing dates. The ones you only see in fairy tales. Some were elaborate events, but others were small and well-thought out. His baby boy obviously deserved to be treated, but he wasn’t used to that extravagant lifestyle. Tony introduced it to him slowly, and in between, they’d have picnics in the park, or go bowling. Tony may have pulled some strings to ensure they wouldn’t be bothered on their little date, but overall, he’d gone out of his way to make Peter more comfortable - and that was the important part.

Like any relationship, it did slow down after a few years, but of course the love never fizzled out. It couldn’t, they both were much too infatuated with each other.

And now it had been five years. Peter had spent seven years with his hero, with his best friend, and most of all, his true love. Or rather, it was coming up to five years. Peter had grown from this shy, intelligent young man, into this adult, over the time they’d been together. And Tony was so happy to be able to experience it. He never once let his love die out. He couldn’t, it was impossible, he loved Peter more than anyone else in this world.

However, the last couple of weeks, had Peter questioning all of that. He’d tried to deny it, he tried to shove the feeling away. And yet, more time passed. Tony had become secretive, he was coming back late at night. Leaving for ling periods of time. He wouldn’t tell Peter where he was going. He shielded his phone screen from him, wouldn’t let him on his laptop. From such an open relationship to this, it was quite a change. And Peter was terrified. Because his worst fear was coming true. Tony has become tired of him.

Everyone knew Tony was a good man. He had a good heart. Even before his soft side came out around Peter. The man didn’t want to hurt anyone. He was elaborate, impulsive and stubborn. He needed constant, care and attention, because he’d probably end up dead without it. Not sleeping, or staying up all night working on a new gadget. Forgetting to eat. It was stuff like that in which everyone questioned how Peter managed to put up with it for so long. Never in a million years did Peter think it was because Tony Stark was a cheater.

And yet here they were. Of course that was the only valid explanation. He’d asked Tony countless of times if he was okay. If he needed help, and Tony would only grunt and push him away, saying he was fine.

It had been weeks since Peter felt those slightly chapped lips against his own. It had been weeks since he’d felt his large hands on his body. God it had been weeks since he’d ever been touched in the most innocent of ways. He was lucky to even sleep in the same bed as Tony anymore. He either fell asleep in his lab, and got angry when Peter woke him up; fell asleep on the couch, or just wasn’t even home at night anymore.

Any previous love and warmth Peter used to get from Tony, how loved he used to feel, it was all gone.

-

It was exactly five days and three hours before their anniversary when Peter finally snapped. Tony hadn’t even held a proper conversation with him. When he tried to speak, and tell him something, he was met only with grunts. Or half-hearted, one word answers. He didn’t even lift his gaze from his laptop anymore.

And Peter didn’t know if it was the feeling that Tony was obviously falling out of love with him that hurt the most, or the feeling that Tony didn’t even want to admit to it.

Peter tried, he tried so hard. To fix it, to somehow make him love him again. He’d dressed up all nice for him. Well, Tony liked it when Peter wore his clothes. So he stood there, a baggy t-shirt that reached his thighs, hanging off his thin and curvy body. It barely held onto his shoulders, falling down exposing the milky-white of his collar bone. Underneath, he was wearing the best pair of lacy underwear he owned. He’d painted his lips red, applied mascara to his eyelashes and tried so hard to be beautiful so that Tony could actually see him again. And yet when Tony walked through the door, from God knows where, he barely gave Peter a look over.

He tried not to let it get to him yet. Walking seductively over to the couch where Tony had gotten comfortable. Making sure to over-accentuate the sway in his hips, he got down onto his knees beside him on the couch. He softly rubbed his chest through his shirt, humming sweetly feeling the muscular hardness that lay underneath. His intentions were clear. If he was sexy, he’d love him? Right?

“Hey..”, he hummed softly. “Did you have a good day?”

Maybe Peter wouldn’t have been so irked about the way Tony took his wrist, and extracted it from his chest, with so little emotion, if he’d even looked him in the eyes. Maybe Peter’s heart wouldn’t have sickeningly dropped into his stomach if Tony didn’t put his phone down, the moment Peter came to sit beside him. Face down, on his thigh.

“It was fine”, came the reply. There was no emotion in it, so little care. Peter could see the cogs and machines in Tony’s head whirring with new ideas. But surprisingly not guilt.. that was a good sign, right?

He let out a slight huff of air, puffing out his pink cheeks as he held his hands to his own chest. One last try.. one last try and then he’d give up. He moved down onto the floor, getting bewteen Tony’s legs. His small hands caressed the strong thighs as he looked up at him innocently. “I missed you today daddy”, he muttered sweetly, fluttering his eyelashes. His fingers moved to Tony’s pants, letting out a small low moan as he felt the outline of his member. He softly rubbed at it, moving to mouth at Tony’s thigh.

He hadn’t been expecting Tony to stand up so suddenly. Peter fell back onto his rear, looking up at him with a confused, and pained gaze. “Not today Peter, I’m tired”, Tony said gruffly, as he simply stepped past the boy and moved out of the room.

If he’d stayed long enough, he’d be able to hear Peter’s broken whimper that fell from his lips. The tears came in soon after, his body trembling as he didn’t even try to move. Only curled up on the floor and sobbed. Tony had really fallen out of love with him.

-

Four days before their anniversary. Peter spent the night alone. He muttered a vague exscuse to Friday, telling him to tell Tony that he’d gone to help Aunt May with a lock on a door that needed to be fixed. There was no text, no phone call, no nothing from Tony that night. He cried himself to sleep in his old room. He didn’t tell May, no matter how much he felt as is his whole body was hurting, crying out for comfort.

When he arrived back the next day, Peter was all alone, once again. He didn’t know why he was surprised. He didn’t want to accuse Tony, Peter really didn’t do well with confrontations. But apart from the secrets, Peter had no evidence. He’d tried. He asked Friday, he asked Pepper. His clothes didn’t smell like anyone else, it’s not like he had hickeys on his neck. Their lube was still untouched. But Peter knew Tony was smarter than that, and he wouldn’t be surprised if Tony easily got away with cheating.

When he came home that evening, he moved to go straight down to the lab. But Peter stood in his way, his arms crossed over his chest. He was angry, but behind the glaring daggers, was a smooth glossiness in his eyes. He was nothing without the man. “Tony can you please come and eat dinner with me. I made us chicken, and I even made you that desert you like for after…”, he begged. His voice was shaky. He didn’t know why he was scared, but he was.

“I’ve got stuff to do Pete.. can you bring it down to my lab?”, he questioned, trying to side step the boy but Peter intercepted him.

The younger let out a long breath. “No, Tony. You’re coming to eat with me”, he demanded. One eyebrow raise, and Peter was cowering. He let out a slight whimper. He wasn’t scared of Tony, he’d never be scared of Tony. He’d never hit him, or made him think he was going to hit him. He wasn’t abusive in any way. Even when he was angry, with Peter he was only ever soft and gentle. So no, Peter wasn’t scared of Tony. He was scared of the truth. He was scared of having to find out that Tony was in fact cheating on him.

But Peter couldn’t deal with this agony anymore.

“What’s going on Tony”, he whimpered quietly, finally stepping down and wrapping his arms around his own body, cradling himself because Tony wouldn’t.

He took the silence from the other man as confusion. “You’re cheating on me aren’t you?”, he finally sobbed out. His vision was bleary from the tears, which he finally let fall. His body was weak, and he couldn’t hold himself up. Which is why he fell against the wall, before simply crashing to the floor.

Tony’s eyes widened, instantly moving to try and catch the boy but Peter only curled away from his touch. “Don’t touch me”, he screamed. “You’re filthy, you’re a liar. You’re nothing better than a cheater”, he cried out.

Tony stumbled away, holding his arms up to show the boy that he respected his decision. But right there in that moment, Tony’s heart broke. Granted it probably didn’t feel like anything the way Peter had been feeling. But Tony felt like he could throw up there and then. “Baby what are you talking about? I would never, you know that”, he said softly.

Peter scoffed, looking up to him with the most betrayed gaze. “Just save it Tony”, he muttered, shaking his head. “You’ve been wanting me gone for weeks now, I can tell. And I’ll be gone by tonight…”, he said quietly.

His little body was weak. He’d gone through hell and back in battles; whilst on patrol. Clearly though, none of that had ever took his energy away like this did. Peter was done fighting. He was done trying to act like he was still wanted. He couldn’t. If he did any longer, he thought he might burst.

“Peter no, please. I’m not cheating on you I promise. Baby please come on, we’ll talk about this”, Tony tried to explain. “Just let me tell you what’s been going on Peter please.”

The man was begging at this point. If Peter left him, he’d be nothing. He was nothing. Peter was his rock. His happiness on his bad days. His sole reason for not giving up. He was the cause for most of his smiles. For the happiness in his heart. He wanted a family with Peter, he wanted to grow old with him… older with him. He wanted him there when he was taking his last breath. And if he wasn’t, well the mere thought caged Tony into a spiral of pain. And it would never end, if this continued in the way it seemed to be going.

Yet Peter wasn’t listening. He’d wasted everything and now that he was left with nothing, he was numb. He didn’t see the fact that Tony seemed genuinely upset. He was being sincere. But Peter didn’t realise.

“There’s nothing to talk about Tony”, he mumbled. He seemed to be less distraught now, wiping away the tears on his cheeks so that only icy salt trails remained. His body was still shaking but he somehow still managed to push himself up off the floor.

“I just gotta know one thing Tony. Why?”

Tony didn’t know what to say. Or course he didn’t. He never cheated so there was no why. But he could see why Peter thought he did. He hadn’t exactly been the best boyfriend to him over the past few weeks. But he had a reason. He just wanted everything to be perfect. Granted that didn’t justify his actions to his poor baby. But they both knew the way Tony got when he was so determined.

But Peter didn’t take Tony’s silence well. He let out a dry laugh, shaking his head. “Am I not young enough for you anymore. Is that it?”, he spat. Ignoring the shocked sound that Tony emitted, he continued. “I’m too old aren’t I Tony? I’m too old for you now. I’m not a virgin. I’m used. You only like young boys, with tight little holes. Who you can use, and fuck up. And act like you love them. And then leave them when you decide they’re not enough anymore”, he snapped.

Tony’s mouth dropped open. His stomach churning horribly. The fact that Peter actually thought that about Tony. That he’d do that. It hurt. It hurt a lot. It got to the point where Peter’s shouting turned into a low drawl. Reminding Tony of how much of a fuck up he was. “Peter..”, he began quietly, but the boy was adamant. He flew at Tony, hands hitting at his chest. And Tony grabbed onto his wrists trying to stop him. Both looked so damn tired and broken.

“You leave boys thinking their loved, when in reality they were only used”, Peter sobbed. He went weak against Tony, falling against his chest.

This time Tony caught him. Strong, but trembling arms circling around his waist to keep the boy up. “Peter.. baby please. That’s not true. I love you, I love you so much. You’re my world.. y-you’re my life. Without you-“, he tried to plead. He was holding onto him as he tried to hold onto the strings of their relationship. Clutching at the boy, clawing to keep him with him.

“Then what have you been doing?”, Peter asked quietly. His beautiful eyes, dull, not their usual bright innocence, staring up at Tony through crystal tears. He was hopeful, clearly yearning for the man to say the right thing. So that he could wrap his arms around him and cling onto him.

But Tony faltered. His own eyes filling with tears of his own. Because Tony had a heart. And Peter always bought it out of him without fail. “I can’t tell you..”, he stated meekly. He already knew the consequences of his words when he saw Peters whole face turn pale. His whole world just crumbled around him and Tony saw it so clearly. And he hated it.

There was the confirmation.

“But please Peter.. I can’t because it’s.. it’s… baby please. You have to believe me.”

Peter didn’t speak at first. Pulling away from Tony, even as the man tried desperately to keep him in his arms.

“Tony I love you..”, he said softly. “And if you’re lying or not I don’t know. But this isn’t right Tony.” He was trying to be strong, it was obvious. His voice shook, but he looked Tony in the eyes. “I think we need to take some time apart”, he said quietly. He gave him a weak smile, before stepping around him.

Tony was frozen. The pure look of hopelessness etched into his face. He cried out for Peter, begging him. He wasn’t even forming full coherent sentences anymore. He followed the boy like a puppy. His words close to whines. Except this really was a matter of life or death. Because without Peter, there was no life. “Baby please”, “I love you”, “just wait baby you’ll see”, “Peter please don’t do this”

Peter wasn’t sure how he managed to not crack. But as Tony stood in the doorway of their shared room, pleading with all of his heart, Peter packed his case up.

He wasn’t saying this was it. It was obvious Tony did still love him. He wouldn’t sound so genuine if he wasn’t. So Peter admitted he was wrong from that aspect. But they didn’t keep secrets from each other. They didn’t push each other other other.

He’d warned Tony this would happen if ever did. It happened once at the beginning of their realatinship. It was a warning that Tony had kept thus far. But Tony took it too far this time. Peter had tried everything and only failed. Even when seeing the error in his ways, Tony still refused. Love or not, Peter was upset. He had yet to decide what he wanted to do. But for now, he needed to be alone.

-

The day of their anniversary came by way too quickly. Peter had gone to Aunt May’s. Never having an apartment of his own, only living with Tony, he didn’t have a choice. To put it lightly every day felt like death. He did nothing but wrap himself in a den in his room. He didn’t speak to anyone. Just cocooned himself under thousands of blankets and got through at least twenty tubs of ice cream.

Tony wasn’t doing much better. He’d been told by many people in his life that he was going to Hell. He’d at least thought that would happen after his death. On the first day. He didn’t leave his bed. It took him being shouted at by practically everyone who knew them, for him to finally lift himself from his bed.

He had little hope, but within the feeling of dread in his heart, he managed to find the smallest little spek. And he grew from it. The planning he’d been doing, all the care and preparation he’d been taking to make this anniversary the best one for Peter, he continued. Holding onto the thought that Peter would just stay with him, holding onto so tight, that the rope that anchored their relationship, was peeling the skin off his hands.

And that’s how he found himself at the Parker residence early in the morning of their anniversary. He had the most beautiful bouquet of flowers in one hand. Roses, sunflowers, rhododendrons, all coming together to make a kaleidoscope of colours all tied together with a large pink bow. In the other hand, he had a brown paper bag. Waffles, pancakes, fruits and croissants, Peter’s favourite breakfast. As well as a smoothie, Tony had made himself, fresh fruits, ice cream and that weird coconut paste Peter liked so much. Tony remembered all the times Peter would complain about having to make his own smoothie because Tony’s “always taste better.” He’d chuckle and ruffle his hair, moving to make it for him, as he joked.. “that’s because it’s made with love!”,

He sighed softly, raising one hand to awkwardly knock at the door. It took a while for it to be opened, until he was suddenly faced with a grumpy-looking, and quite sleepy May. She seemed to grow quite angry at the sight of the man who had broken his nephews heart, but at Tony’s obviously sheepish and quite broken smile, she sighed and let him in. No words were passed bewteen the two, but May knew. Peter wasn’t right, and neither was Tony. There was only one conclusion to that, and it was that without each other, they didn’t function as well as they did when they were.

Tony trailed round to Peter’s room. He didn’t knock expecting the boy to be fast asleep. Which is why he was so surprised to see him sitting up in bed. The blanket was pooling at his waist, revealing that Peter was sitting there in one of Tony’s science shirts. He had his laptop on his lap, and Tony caught first hand, the real destruction he’d caused.

Tissues littered the bed, and the floor, a swamp of pain and hurt. Tony despised it. So many tears.. all because of him. Peter’s eyes were blood shot, and the dark bags underneath them proved well that he hadn’t had any sleep. Unlike Tony, Peter wasn’t used to hiding exactly how tired he was. Those same eyes snapped up to Tony in surprise hearing the door opened. His gaze moved to the flowers, then to the bag, before dropping back down to his laptop. “What are you doing here Tony?”, he asked tiredly, already exasperated with this conversation before it had even started.

Tony wasn’t going to mention it, because his boy was beautiful even at his worst, but Peter clearly hadn’t touched soap and water for the past few days. Yet Tony pushed that thought to the back of his mind, moving over to the bed, and shutting the door with his foot. “Apologising”, he said softly.

Peter couldn’t help it, he burst into laughter that. But Tony noticed how it was so far from his usual joyful giggles. Tony’s favourite sound in the whole world. A captivating melody that never failed to make him cry out in happiness because even the sound of Peter’s voice was his safe haven. But no. This laugh was bitter and cold. “I think you’ve done enough of that”, Peter replied, reflecting back to the day he left.

Tony frowned, looking down. “I don’t think I’ll ever stop”, he whispered quietly. His words left them in quite an uncomfortable silence. Neither really knew what to say. It took Tony a moment before he registered that this is what Peter must have felt like. Except ten times worse.

“I bought you breakfast”, he said, causing Peter to peer over the bag with an almost longing gaze. He nodded his head. Thanking him quietly.

Tony had planned to stay, but he figured he’d have to do more than this to get Peter to truly forgive him. It was a dent in his plans, but one that could be easily resolved.

“Is that all?”, Peter asked, almost like he was waiting. Expecting something. Tony had yet to forget their anniversary, he sincerely hoped today wouldn’t be the day that he did.

But Tony nodded his head. “I love you baby”, he said softly, giving him a gentle smile. He leaned down to press a soft, apologetic kiss to Peter’s head. Peter tensed up but he didn’t unwelcome it.

Tony cleared his throat slightly, setting the flowers and bag down, before turning away and leaving.

Peter looked on with a gaze of disbelief. He scrambled to get up, looking over the flowers and the bag, for a card, a note… anything. But there was nothing. He let out a small sob, but caught himself a moment. He couldn’t cry anymore. He wouldn’t let himself. He sat back on his bed, pulling his knees to his chest. He stared into nothing. His whole body feeling numb and tired. Tony may not have cheated, but god was he an asshole.

Unknowing to the poor boy in his room, Tony was sharing whispered plans with May. She seemed reluctant. But in the end, Tony managed to leave with a plan. Everything he’d been planning, could still happen. It just needed to happen quickly.

-

“But I don’t want to go out…”

“Too bad, I’m making you. So go and get dressed, something formal please Peter”

It had been a long struggle for May. It had took a total of two hours and twenty four minutes to persuade Peter to at least just go and get dressed. She came up with some lie about how she was taking him out to go and get something to eat.

Lucky for her, the boy, in his hazy mind, didn’t question how May could afford to go anywhere formal, or why she was taking him out in the first place. The last thing Peter needed was a reminder to what he should be doing with Tony. It explained his reluctance.

He couldn’t lie and say he didn’t cave and eat the sweet goods Tony bought for breakfast. They tasted better than any of the ice cream he shoved down his throat. And he liked to believe that the smoothie did as well. He wasn’t saying Tony didn’t love him anymore, but those berries tasted quite bitter. Granted, it could have probably been from him having not brushed his teeth for a few days.

He did drag himself out of bed eventually at May’s requests. He showered, and brushed his teeth. He ended up in the living room of their apartment. Peter didn’t own many formal clothes. But Tony had always made sure he had a small selection. Lucky for May (or so he thought) Peter had took a white dress shirt with him, and some black fitted pants. He didn’t have a tie or a blazer but he was sure that could be excused considering half of his clothes weren’t exactly here.

Peter’s gaze fell on May, his doe eyes turning confused as she didn’t seem to be dressed very formally. “What’s going on?”, he begged. He truly was done with all the lies. But May shook her head, ushering him out the door.

Sometime later he found himself at some restutant he knew for sure May couldn’t afford. It was fancy as hell, floor to ceiling, large glass windows. The whole place was lit up in preparation for the lowering sun. Peter could see from the parking lot that this was beyond anywhere he could even think of going.

At this point the young spider was suspicious. A place like this, on his supposed anniversary with Tony, it could only be his doing. As he turned around to May to question her, he was surprised to see her casually sitting in her seat. “May.. take me home”, he said in a calm voice, though it wavered. He was so heavy with emotion.

“Trust me Pete, just listen to what he has to say”, May begged. And although Peter had lied to the woman countless of times. He couldn’t ever really bring himself to say no to her. He sighed, moving to press a kiss to her cheek, before getting out of the car. He was clearly reluctant, he didn’t want to be doing this at all. But then again.. did it prove he hadn’t forgotten. He looked up at the restutant, his lips pressed in an unwelcoming tight line as he stepped inside. The waiter at the door nodded his head to him, before ushering Peter to follow him.

He was lead into a lift. Nervously, and clearly quite awakrdly, rocking on his heels as he waited to be took up to where he was supposed to be going. Yet Peter never expected for the lift to open on the very top of the building. It was quite up here, but so beautiful. And as he stepped out of the lift, he saw Tony’s broad outline, standing looking over the city below them.

Peter shivered slightly, not alerting the man of his presence, though he presumed he’d already known. Yet Peter took the time to take it in, looking around with the most shocked and yet thankful expression.

It honestly was beautiful. In the corner, was a fire pit and what Peter presumed was one of the most comfiest looking seating areas he’d ever seen. Fairy lights were strung up on wooden beams. Bushes with beautiful flowers made the place look greener. Candles were dotted around. It had a very modern feel, but at the same time it had a calm and solitude feeling to it. There was one large table, with two seats. Peter walked up to it, smiling at the sight of the small stuffed bear that was there. He moved to pick up the small tag attactched to it.

To Peter ~

5 year and counting, and here’s to many more.. I love you so much baby, don’t you ever forget that.

~ Tony xx

“Tony?”, he whispered quietly, walking slowly over to the man. Tony turned around with a small, sad smile, leaning back against the railing.

“Hey baby, you like it?”, he asked softly. “It’s what I’ve been working on these past few weeks.. for you, for our anniversary”, he whispered softly, a gentle smile on his face.

Recognsition and understand fell over Peter’s face. It didn’t take long until he realised. “So you weren’t cheating on me?”, he questioned in a quite tone.

Tony shook his head. “Never in a million years”, he answered, looking over Peter with the most loving gaze, as he finally came to a stop in front of him.

“And you didn’t forget our anniversary?”

“Does it look like I did”, he replied, gesturing around at everything.

“It’s the reason why I’ve been so secretive. I had this built. I worked alongside the restaurant, and did all the planning and whatnot. I did it for you baby. So we could enjoy this place together”, he hummed.

A blush formed on Peter’s cheeks as he realized what he’d done. What he’d caused. All because he hadn’t believed Tony. He stayed silent, but practically fell into the arms, Tony instantly wrapping his arms around him and holding him close. “God I’ve missed you so much”, he muttered into his hair, breathing in the familiar scent of his shampoo.

“I missed you too”, Peter murmured, burying his head in his chest as he clawed at the back of his suit jacket desperate for Tony’s warmth and protection.

They stayed like that for a quite a while. They didn’t speak much for the sole reason that they were content just standing there wrapped up in each others warmth. If didn’t take long though until Peter lifted his head. He peeked over Tony’s shoulder and his eyes went wide. “wow, it’s so pretty”, he murmured softly. Of course, the sun has began to set, and Peter and Toby could watch it right here. 

The sky was filled with a beautiful coloring of oranges and reds. It was a comforting fire, that mimicked the one both felt in their souls. But Tony couldn’t appreciate it too much. Because his gaze was stuck on something, or rather someone, that beat the sunset by miles. “Yeah, it is”, he said softly, giving Peter another gentle squeeze and pressing a kiss to his head. 

 The night passed by quite quickly. It was amazing. Such an intimate and lovely date. Of course, Tony being as extra as he was, spoiled Peter. As they ate some delicious food, sipping on wine that Peter couldn’t even pronounce, he was startled by a sudden explosion. He looked up, his gaze wide in surprise, before his mouth dropped open. Fireworks. Amazing fireworks above them.

 Peter was so entranced, he didn’t even notice how nervous Tony seemed to be as he shifted in his seat. And no it’s not because he paid someone to set off fireworks, but rather another reason. And Tony quite literally thought he was about to be sick. “Tony look, they’re so cool”, he whispered in awe. But Tony wasn’t looking. No. Tony had gotten up from his seat and was walking around to Peter’s. the boy didn’t notice at first. Nor did he notice Tony reaching his pocket and pulling out a sleek black box. Nor did he notice him getting down on one knee. It was only when he realized he never did quite get a reply, in which he shifted his gaze down from the colors above them, and down to Tony. Peter began to splutter and choke on air in shock. “Tony! W-what?”, he questioned, looking down at the box with wide eyes. 

 Tony smiled softly, opening up the box to reveal a ring. It was simple, knowing Peter wouldn’t want anything too flashy. But in a lot of ways, it was so much better. 

“Peter. You’ve given me the best five years of my life so far. And I know sometimes I don’t always show it. But I love you so much. And I wasn’t kidding when I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. You’re my world. My everything. My rock. My whole life I didn’t realise why I never felt true happiness, but as soon as I met you I realised it’s because you weren’t in my life. When I met you everything became brighter. When I met you, my whole life seemed to stop. Because you make me go absolutely batshit crazy Peter and I wouldn’t change that for the world. So please, will you make the happiest man on earth. And marry me?”, he asked softly. 

 Peter’s tears came before Tony had even opened his mouth to speak. He was full on sobbing by the end, nodding his head because he couldn’t properly get the words out. Tony chuckled softly, moving to slip the ring onto the boys finger gently. angst

 Of course, Peter being Peter couldn’t hold back, he launched himself at Tony, clinging onto him like a koala as he smashed their lips together. When they did finally pull away from their soft, sweet kisses, Peter looked over Tony with the most adoring gaze you could ever see.

 He giggled softly. “I love you so much”, he whispered. Tony smiled softly, holding his baby boy to him gently. “I love you more Peter”, he whispered softly, before he guided them into another kiss, under the crackle of the fireworks above.

[kiruuuuu]

YES

I’m honestly amazed whenever anyone reads the tags, but thank you so much @bibblesofthemanforest for complying to my request about sending in a request 💕 @spacecreatorart, you did the same, so thank you as well 💗💗 This is for the both of you, I hope you enjoy!! (Rating E, explicit/Bandit is so stupidly in love, ~5.7k words)

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Bandit likes Montagne’s room.

It’s the on the comfortable side of tidy, not compulsively neat like Doc’s nor as barren as Pulse’s, more lived-in and welcoming without too many things strewn about. It’s not busy to look at, few decorations but all of them personal or specifically chosen, some photos of family, some of colleagues in GIGN, a few newspaper articles. Montagne collects small trinkets which ultimately don’t serve a practical purpose but are either beautifully crafted or possess an intricate mechanism: a puzzle box, a construction made of nothing but cogs, all movable simultaneously, an ancient kaleidoscope. He’s a fan of codes as well, even has a secret compartment built into one of the drawers in his desk but nothing interesting or blackmail-worthy in it – Bandit checked it as soon as he was left alone in his room for the first time.

The atmosphere is quiet. Thinking about it, it’s probably the calming effect the room in its entirety has on Bandit, the furniture and all the personal items exuding a strange tranquillity so unlike anywhere else in the base. Probably anywhere else full stop. He likes just existing here, an oasis of peace amid his otherwise eventful life where he can do whatever he wants, where lazing is allowed and nothing expected of him. It’s a little like being on holiday – his only obligation is to enjoy his time, everything else is voluntary and every activity viable. Even if it’s ultimately useless, like encoding short messages with the help of one of the many books Montagne has collected on the topic and then depositing them in the secret compartment before burning the original. He doesn’t think Montagne uses it, ever, so a morbid part of him imagines himself dying on the job and leaving the sheets of paper behind as a gift.

Here’s something else Montagne doesn’t know: it’s remarkably easy to break into his room. Bandit usually manages in less than ten seconds, sometimes just to check whether it really is that easy, sometimes to drink his coffee alone while doing some paperwork, sometimes to just curl up on the couch and think of nothing for a bit. His own room is the exact opposite of a safe haven, it’s a temple of doubt and its gods are fear and anger. He probably conditioned himself to feel uncomfortable in it, associates it with loneliness and the aftermath of arguments he laughed off though parts of it cut deep. This one… these four walls he associates with nothing but comfort.

A small click makes him jerk awake out of a light doze – he’s been playing around on his phone while outstretched on the sofa and decided to snooze a little but didn’t expect Montagne to return, just like his lover quite clearly didn’t expect him to be here, judging by his astonished expression. He sits up and pretends to be wide awake even though he feels like he slept for hours, mouth wet on one side where he drooled on a pillow and him squinting into the bright light which Montagne, ever considerate, turns off in favour of his desk and bedside lamps. “Hey”, he mumbles and sounds almost drunk, “why you here already?”

Montagne graces him with a fond smile which grows when Bandit wipes his mouth. “How did you get in?”

“Squeezed through the window.” Both of them look over to the window right above the desk, the windowsill adorned with a small handful of ornate figurines bent from various metals and untouched. “Anyway, why are you back this early? Short dinner?”

“It’s half ten”, his lover tells him gently and oh shit, that means Bandit did sleep for hours. Great, so later he won’t be able to, might even wake Montagne up in the middle of the night and he doesn’t want to do that, doesn’t want to be a burden. He frowns but Montagne walks over after having taken off his shoes, emptied his pockets of wallet, phone and keys, ready for cuddling but for now, all he does is tower over him and stroke his cheek until Bandit’s scowl fades. “Did someone let you in?”

“I’m not a fucking pet”, Bandit grumbles and rubs his cheek against Montagne’s palm appreciatively.

“So no one did? You broke in?” He sits down and allows Bandit to climb on top of him, rumpling his clothes in the process. They’re unusually fancy, courtesy of the special dinner he attended this evening – old friends were in the vicinity and so he and Doc invited them out. He smells good, fresh and manly and though Bandit likes the scent, he wants him to wash it off as soon as possible, mark him with his own smell somehow in case anyone gets funny ideas. His clothes make him look even more respectable and build a stark contrast to Bandit’s sweatpants and ill-fitting t-shirt but Montagne doesn’t seem to mind, embraces him regardless and even lets Bandit start to unbutton his subtly patterned dress shirt.

“Basically, yeah”, he admits while revealing more and more of Montagne’s sculpted chest, the dark hairs, the hard muscles underneath the pale skin.

“Did you miss me that much?”

His hands still. It’s meant as a joke, he knows this, and yet the words hit home. Because the only thing better at calming the storm raging inside him than Montagne’s room is Montagne himself. It’s not bad enough that he’s unable to complete daily tasks without him but he does indeed notice a prolonged absence, feels it keenly when they’re not sleeping next to each other. He’s gotten used to him. And he doesn’t even mind. “Yeah”, he replies quietly, “I guess I did.”

A silence follows. When he’s scraped together enough courage to lift his gaze, Montagne is looking at him with such helpless adoration that he immediately has to fight rising embarrassment about having laid himself open like this. Before he can backpedal, however, Montagne pulls him closer and effortlessly gets up, simply carries him to the bed and lies down on his back, Bandit still straddling him. “You’re so sweet. I miss you too, Dom, and I always look forward to seeing you.”

Okay, they’re delving dangerously far into uncomfortable territory now, Bandit trying not to let the words get to him (but they always do, like a plant he stretches towards the warmth they bring) and finishes his job in silence, pretending not to notice the way Montagne beams up at him as he pushes his shirt open and digs his fingertips into scorching skin, drags them down Montagne’s broad chest. A hand comes to rest on his cheek again for a moment, travels a bit and curls around the back of his head to nudge him towards his lover, making him bend down and lock lips with him. The pleasant smell together with the large body between his legs is making him light-headed, the soft lips moving against his own doing their part as well and so he doesn’t notice the hands on his thighs at first. When he finally does, they’re kneading his flesh, thumbs dangerously close to his crotch.

The message is clear and the blood rushing to the lower half of his body leaves him even dizzier – when Montagne isn’t in the mood, he carefully avoids sending the wrong signals so there’s no ambiguity. Normally, he prefers going to sleep directly after having been out late which is why Bandit didn’t expect anything yet he easily adapts to this change of pace by turning their kiss sloppy, licks over Montagne’s lower lip and sucks on it, purrs when the hands glide further back and massage his ass. Pleased about this new development, he deepens the kiss and begins grinding down against Montagne, reciprocating the smile he feels pulling at Montagne’s mouth. They’re on the same page and it’s tangible how much they both enjoy the lazy swirling of tongues, the friction of their lower halves, the simplicity of each other’s company.

After a while, long after Bandit can feel Montagne’s own erection alongside his, after their hands have roamed over skin, Bandit breaks the kiss and sits up, breathing hard. He’s adapting to Montagne’s slow pace over time, learning to cherish the small things like making Montagne’s shaft jump against his by brushing over one of his nipples, repeating the motion, rubbing over it, becoming more and more insistent over the course of minutes and relishing the moans when he finally pinches it properly. Still, there’s a limit and he’s about to reach it.

“Do you do this often?”, Montagne asks, voice thick with lust already, while Bandit unbuckles his belt impatiently, eager to do whatever it is he’s allowed today. He hopes he can blow him, it’s his absolute favourite way of getting Montagne off because for once, he doesn’t need to go slow simply because his lover takes forever like that anyway – he usually ends up with an aching jaw and a sore throat for which Montagne apologises endlessly since he doesn’t believe Bandit when he reassures him it’s worth it. “Come here, I mean. I somehow don’t believe that today was the first time you did.”

If it’d been the first time, he would’ve been more careful, Montagne is right. He delays answering for a bit by struggling with the trousers until Montagne takes pity on him and lifts his hips (and it’s such a turn on that he can do this even with Bandit’s weight on him) so Bandit can push the offending piece of clothing over them and down to his knees, where Montagne begins peeling them off himself. “Yeah. I do it sometimes. No one looks for me here and it’s quiet.” It’s only half the truth and he feels guilty about the adoration it earns because he knows Montagne is already content with this but would be overflowing with happiness if he knew the full reason. Bandit likes seeing him happy. After a small pause, he reluctantly adds: “It makes me think of you. And it calms me down.”

He’s not looking at him but can picture Montagne’s reverent expression anyway, has seen it numerous times before and is always filled with a certain sense of pride when he causes it – that, and a tingling, warm feeling. The mountain underneath him comes alive, sits up and captures him in a tight hold, lips finding their way to the sensitive place right below Bandit’s ear and he hears himself gasp in return. “Dom”, they whisper against his skin and send a shiver down his spine, “I want you. All of you.”

Oh God. It’s finally happening.

Shakily, he responds with a strangled yes, tries not to freak out too much and does so regardless. He’s been looking forward to this for weeks, ever since they kissed the second time, even more after Montagne first touched him. Part of it is the base desire, the simple attraction drawing him towards this man, but another part is the wish to be as close to him as possible, be allowed to share this experience with him and if that doesn’t sound like the romanticised view of a blushing virgin, then what else does? Immediately, an overwhelming desire thrums through him and he barely manages to murmur: “Whatever you do, don’t touch my dick or I’ll come straightaway.”

An amused huff against his neck later, Montagne takes the lead.

Bandit has daydreamed about this moment extensively and narrowed it down to a few likely and a few preferred scenarios – he’s prepared to guide Montagne along, help him with crass words and instructions which both shock and arouse him, just like he’s ready to take control himself. More than ready. In most of his fantasies, he overpowers the taller man, makes him writhe in ecstasy as Bandit bounces on him, impales himself on his large cock over and over, though in others Montagne finally snaps, loses his patience and fucks him into next week because he just can’t help himself anymore. He pictured a spur-of-the-moment quickie, a drawn out session in which Montagne sadistically balances him on the edge for most of it, and none of it comes even close. Despite spending entirely too much time imagining this moment, he doesn’t expect what actually happens at all.

Because Montagne seduces him.

There’s no other way of putting it, he slowly takes him apart with loving words and affectionate gestures and Bandit has never felt this powerless in his life before. Montagne knows all his weakspots and makes ample use of this knowledge – he has Bandit squirming in his lap before he’s even taken his shirt off. All of his movements are fluid, a perfect string of kisses and strokes, lulling Bandit in the longer it goes on. His words are equally as smooth, pure honey running down Bandit’s skin and pooling low in his belly, an endless stream of compliments which are far from meaningless because Bandit knows he means them, believes them from the bottom of his heart and so instead of empty, they’re so filled to the brim with devotion and admiration that he has no idea how to react.

Hands glide over his ribs while Montagne tells him how happy he is, how much he’s enjoying it all, and Bandit’s thoughts are trapped in molasses, slowed down by the sweetness poured over him that he decides to just not think at all. Never once does he try to wrestle control from Montagne since he’s never seemed more confident in bed, never more alluring. He’s putty in his astonishingly capable hands and not at all surprised when he suddenly finds himself on his back, his upper body naked and being showered in butterfly kisses. He moves under the affectionate ministrations, almost writhes when a tongue dips into his navel, he arches his back and cards a hand through dark hair – he doesn’t even have the presence of mind for anything more than that.

Soft moans fall from his lips, interrupted only by short but deep kisses; he’s never been this aroused in his life and yet he’s lacking the usual sense of urgency which accompanies his lust, probably because he’s too busy basking in all the wonderful things Montagne’s mouth and hands are doing to him. It’s an incredible turn-on to realise just how well acquainted Montagne is with his body, to feel first hand how attentive he can be especially since the idea of just leaning back and letting someone else do what they want with him is foreign. He supposes Montagne possesses vastly more experience in this regard, knows how to treat someone in a relationship and how to satisfy them in a very different way than Bandit does.

After a perceived eternity, his sweatpants are discarded as well, followed by his underwear and it’s an odd sensation to feel this vulnerable in front of someone. Montagne kisses and even sucks on the insides of his thighs, leaves light red marks next to the black ink weaving its way around his leg and by now, the lust is almost unbearable. Montagne complied with his request, hasn’t touched his crotch anywhere, is ignoring the painfully hard shaft very enthusiastically reacting to literally everything he does, jumping and oozing precum onto Bandit’s belly. His hands are shaking and his knees are weak with how much he wants this, so when Montagne undresses fully and conjures up a bottle of lube, Bandit is almost ready to beg.

The foreplay so far left him out of breath and worryingly dizzy but it seems Montagne isn’t nearly done. He leans over the small puddle into which Bandit has transformed over time and licks into his mouth while touching a slick finger to his hole, making it quiver in anticipation. Bandit, unchanged, is unable to take the initiative and instead suffers quietly, mewls against Montagne’s tongue and feels sparks of pleasure whenever the digit moves, presses slightly, threatens to invade him. It’s effective though, he relaxes after a while and inhales sharply when he’s being breached. There’s a pause and he opens his eyes, doesn’t remember when he closed them, only to find Montagne smiling down at him. He’s beautiful and so perfect it fucking hurts to look at him, he’s sharp and intense and sees all the way inside Bandit, unravels him effortlessly.

He can’t take it. He averts his gaze, even turns around with some difficulty which makes it better because now he can hide his face in the same pillow which muffles his moans when Montagne crooks his finger tentatively and rubs over his prostate. Bandit is so mindlessly horny that the simple touch lets him see stars and so he eagerly pushes against the digit to repeat the sensation. Montagne is still leaning over him, heavy erection resting on one of Bandit’s asscheeks, and still he’s leaving kisses all over his shoulders, nibbles at his ear or sucks on the side of his neck. He’s a reassuring weight against Bandit’s back, hot and solid and he wishes they could do it like this, have Montagne drive into him with abandon while the sheets swallow all the embarrassing noises he’ll undoubtedly make but he already knows it’s not going to happen.

For the moment, he enjoys the brief respite from Montagne’s intensity, makes use of the opportunity to let loose a bit and tightens around the finger, lifts his hips and sighs in relief when Montagne gets the hint and adds a second one. The stretch is tangible but far from uncomfortable, thus Bandit begins grinding against the two, feels the thick shaft rub over his skin in the process and he’s going to go insane. This will be the end of him. A dramatic arch of his back is the perfect position for him to fuck himself on Montagne’s fingers and have his dick glide over Bandit’s ass, therefore he very carefully repeats his motions at the exact same angle and height. The friction is amazing, the feel of the digits moving deep inside addictive and Montagne is still peppering him with kisses which by now have turned hungry, wet lips trailing up to his earlobe and teeth cautiously biting at it.

“I want you so much”, the solid weight on top of him whispers and Bandit almost sobs in pleasure, in desire, in desperation, “you’re wonderful. I can’t get enough of you.” He shifts the one hand which keeps him upright and takes one of Bandit’s, squeezes when he interlaces their fingers and no, how did Bandit think simply turning away would allow him to escape this intimacy, it’s still Montagne after all, everything he does resonates in Bandit’s heart, steals the words off his tongue and drives blood into his cheeks. What they’re doing should be sinful, Montagne pushes a third finger in and wrenches a loud groan from Bandit who only speeds up his motions, moans each time fingertips drag over his special spot – and yet it’s not, it doesn’t feel wrong or dirty. It feels divine.

Eventually, Montagne stops him, sits up and makes Bandit feel the loss of him keenly, miss the hand on his, the stretch, the hot flesh against his ass, the teeth on his shoulder. And then, there it is, a soft plea embodying all that he’s afraid of: “Turn around.” Bandit does. As much as he doesn’t want to, there’s no choice.

They look at each other and Montagne is a mirror to Bandit’s expression – flushed, wholly lost in the moment, wanton, yet oddly peaceful. Bandit thought he’d never fully understand why Montagne thinks about sex the way he does.

He was wrong.

“You’re all I ever wanted”, Montagne tells him and it’s clear he’s not joking. Bandit’s lower lip starts trembling. He looks away again, scrambles to regain his composure, put it back together from the fragments into which it just shattered and largely fails. “Are you ready?”

He nods straightaway, replies with a yes on which his voice breaks and gasps when Montagne simply presses their lips together for the moment. The kiss helps, grounds him and calms the staccato of his heart that when his lover withdraws again, they both manage a tentative smile. He plucks the bottle out of Montagne’s hand and squeezes some of the viscous liquid into his palm – normally he’d crack a joke now or say something exceedingly filthy but he doesn’t feel the urge to say anything right now, it doesn’t seem appropriate. He simply admires Montagne’s body for a moment, drinks in the long limbs and toned muscles, the strong upper body and dark fuzz covering it. When he wraps his hand around his cock, Montagne groans and strokes over Bandit’s arms, loath to interrupt his displays of affection for even just a second. His erection is silky to the touch, as hot as the rest of him and rock hard. Montagne is probably as desperate to start as he is.

Bandit lets his hand slide up and down a few times more than necessary, loves the weight of the shaft in his palm but realises the next step is worth stopping for. Expectantly, he lies back down and lovingly gazes up at Montagne who looks down at him with a similar look before scooting closer, and then suddenly his tip is nestled against Bandit and he can’t breathe. The skin on skin contact is electrifying already, so viciously anticipated that he finds it impossible to relax into it, his body taut and pulsing with lust but this is counter-productive, he needs to relax. As if he can sense it, Montagne takes his time, puts Bandit’s legs around his waist, pets his chest and kisses him once more, all the while his head keeps pressing slightly against Bandit’s ring of muscle, gingerly asking for entry which eventually is granted and enforced by Bandit drawing him in, tensing his legs and dragging the body between them closer.

Montagne slips inside and he’s big, there’s a faint burn which only heightens Bandit’s pleasure, but more importantly than that: they’ve become one. Both of them look down to the place where they’re connected, Bandit chewing on his lip while trying to breathe normally, not clamp down and hinder any movement. Very slowly, Montagne pushes deeper, making a space for himself inside Bandit and the slide feels neverending – he’s thick and long, a challenge but extremely satisfying nonetheless. Bandit helps as much as he can but is mostly overwhelmed by the incredible sensation, Montagne is piping hot and the fact that there’s no layer separating them only increases the heady feeling. When he’s fully buried inside, his lover draws a deep breath and admits quietly: “I was worried it wouldn’t fit.”

They laugh softly, the tension dissipated for the moment, and grin at each other again, somehow closer than before. Bandit revels in the feeling of being filled completely, puts his hands on Montagne’s dimpling cheeks and drags him down for another kiss. “I’m so glad we’re doing this.”

Montagne nods. “Me too.”

When he starts moving, it’s back to the barrage of indescribable sensations Bandit experienced earlier, the kind which leaves him speech- and breathless, messes with his head and refuses to let him move for fear of it all disappearing. He feels Montagne push back inside and moans in disbelief – it feels so fucking good he might be able to come just from this, without his dripping erection ever having been touched. Even this part, which is meant to be carnal and unrestrained, somehow ends up sweet and intense at Montagne’s hands, as if he could turn everything he touches into pure elation.

He just lies there and takes it, gladly accepts his fate and moans throatily each time the head brushes over his prostate, which happens a lot. The thrusts are neither particularly hard nor fast but they push him into the mattress regardless, force more and more noises out of his mouth and steadily work towards reducing him to a shuddering mess. Montagne keeps his pace mercilessly, never once speeds up, no matter how hard Bandit pulls or pushes, causing him to start meeting the thrusts to get the most enjoyment out of them. He reaches so deep inside that Bandit is almost scared to allow him deeper but does so anyway, trusts him fully. Now that he’s got Montagne here, between his legs, inside, he’s a little lost on what to do because he knows begging won’t change anything, neither will dirty talk and he has no urge to gain the upper hand either. Instead, he decides to just be content with the ebb and flow of shocking pleasure and soft lips on his own.

This time, the kiss is almost lazy yet still more than just an afterthought, Montagne wants to be even closer to him than they already are and Bandit can’t take it. He feels so good, loves every part of it so much that he’s close to panicking, unsure of what to do with all these emotions suddenly welling up in him – the connection they share is profound, full of meaning and mutual understanding and it’s in that moment that Montagne says: “Look at me.”

And Bandit does. He looks up, defenceless, and returns Montagne’s gaze, feels every inch of him withdraw and slide back in, feels his hips move between his legs, feels his hand on his chin and fingers caressing his jaw, feels his own heart grow at all of these wonderful ministrations. “Keep looking at me”, Montagne demands quietly, asks for the impossible, “we’re going to come at the same time, alright?”

He just nods – any other answer is not an option – and realises with sudden clarity just how aroused he is. Being face to face with the object of his desire is only making things worse, leaves him squirming and panting, even more so when he realises that Montagne normally takes so much longer to come but right now seems to be heavily affected himself. It’s fantastic for the both of them, a thoroughly mind-blowing experience and they’ve only been at it for a few minutes.

No, Bandit corrects himself, it’s not just the penetration itself, it’s everything which made him this desperate, he usually doesn’t spend this much time on everything else, but Montagne worshipped his body, showered him in affection and Bandit even accepted it, didn’t feel odd or undeserving, just… happy. Blissful about the fact that Montagne likes him so much he does all this without even being asked to, that he likes him so much he’s making love to him right now because that’s exactly what he’s doing – again, there’s no other word for it. He overpowered Bandit with all his love and now strips him bare, leaving only the essence of his being and he still loves him for it, Bandit can see it in his dark eyes.

They’re both moaning quietly in between kisses, relishing the friction between their legs, the monumental pleasure building and building towards yet another moment they’ll share. Bandit is clinging to the taller man by now, keeping up their eye contact and noticing every change in Montagne’s expression, the way he gasps when Bandit tenses around him, how he smiles when Bandit hums into a kiss, him growing more and more disbelieving with each thrust. He’s visibly enjoying himself, tells Bandit now and then how good he feels, how stunning he looks, how happy he makes him and it’s nothing like anything Bandit normally does but it feels like filling a hole which made him trip over and over throughout the years, a hole he tried to fill with a variety of things none of which were good enough, they all came loose, tripped him even more, and now – now it’ll fade. Slowly. But it will.

He notices the signs that Montagne is getting close, the increase in volume, his motions becoming irregular, and so Bandit finally does what he’s been wanting to this entire time: snakes one of his hands between their bodies and grips his own glistening erection tightly, gasps at the contact and begins dragging himself onto Montagne’s shaft with his legs. As soon as his lover notices, he ceases all movement, allows Bandit to take over and they’re still looking at each other, continue to do so as Bandit digs his heels into the mattress and drives himself onto the hard dick, despair colouring his actions as he frantically chases his release yet is too focused on his hips to build up a steady rhythm with his hand, ends up half-assing both, moans in frustration and Montagne looks at him like he hung the stars.

“I’m so close”, he says and how can he be when Bandit is doing such a terrible job at satisfying them both, he’s throwing his head back and slams his hips against Montagne’s, curses and falters when his free hand is grabbed again and held tightly by Montagne and now they’re kissing, even more he has to concentrate on, though if he’s honest most of his focus is on the marvellous cock inside him and then his fist tightens around his sopping wet dick and Montagne starts moving again, bottoms out with every long, slow, deep stroke and Bandit’s gone.

A high-pitched moan is what kicks it off, a reaction to the realisation that he’s just been pushed over the edge and though it hasn’t started fully yet, he knows there’s no going back now. His hand flies over his shaft and he tenses up his entire body, stays still as Montagne mercilessly keeps thrusting, keeps hitting his prostate with worrying accuracy, and allows him to push his orgasm out of him. When the contractions begin, the wonderful, magnificent trembling which spreads through his entirety, his eyes roll back into his head and he feels his erection pulse between his fingers, become a veritable fountain of come which it spews generously all over Bandit’s torso – but it’s even better because Montagne is also climaxing, cock throbbing and mouth letting out the most delicious of noises. They seek each other out, find comfort in the intensity of each other, ride their orgasm out at the same time while Montagne spills deep inside Bandit, their foreheads leaning against each other, their breath mingling.

They’re both shuddering now, twitching with how extreme it is, they’re out of breath and elated and basking in their shared pleasure, Bandit drawing out his orgasm with practised movements and Montagne canting his hips, fully sheathed still. Coming down is hesitant, Montagne initiates it by brushing his nose over Bandit’s, prompting an exhausted smile which he reciprocates and suddenly they’re grinning at each other like idiots while still feeling the aftershocks. Bandit’s blood is still rushing loudly in his ears and his heartbeat far from calm but none of it can disturb the peace spreading somewhere inside him, the feeling of being appreciated, of being cherished. He relaxes more and more over time, stretches out on the bed and winces slightly when Montagne withdraws – he really is quite large but feels amazing so Bandit would never consider complaining.

Usually, this is the part where either Bandit or his partner gets up, cleans up, has a smoke or goes for a shower. He, however, is so boneless that he’s not going anywhere right now and judging by the fact that Montagne simply lies down next to him and caresses his side, his thighs and his face, he isn’t either. It’s similar to the way he insisted on eye contact, makes it all that little bit more personal, more special. More intimate. Even so, Bandit is wholly overwhelmed for the moment, trying to get his breathing under control and not throw himself on top of Montagne immediately because he’s full of semen and has the sneaking suspicion his lover wouldn’t appreciate sperm all over his chest hair. Instead, he stares at the ceiling, slightly stupefied by how much he adored literally every aspect of what just happened and wondering whether he’s been doing it wrong his entire life.

“I liked that”, Montagne tells him as if it wasn’t absolutely obvious, “thank you.” Before Bandit can even think of making a sarcastic reply, a thumb wanders to his mouth, traces his lips and stills when he kisses it, sucks on the tip of it and bites lightly, all without taking his eyes off Montagne whose gaze grows considerably warmer. “You’re so incredibly erotic, Dom, do you even know that?”

He smirks and reaches out to push some of Montagne’s sweaty locks back. “I might have an idea. You came much faster than usual”, he teases.

“It’s because I didn’t expect you to feel this good. You’re amazing.”

And oh. Oh look. Bandit’s plan to embarrass his lover for once backfired horribly since now it’s him blushing yet again and trying to hide his face but as usual, Montagne just locks lips with him and kisses the urge to become defensive away.

The rest of the evening is calm, they shower together and Bandit almost dozes off while Montagne gently massages his scalp with shampoo, but his favourite part is when he’s being wrapped in one of the oversized towels of which Montagne is so fond and basically hugged dry, twists and turns in Montagne’s embrace while they both giggle and in the end he’s being slung over the tall man’s shoulder and carried to bed without being able to struggle from inside his towel burrito. Once they’re snuggling under the blanket, he asks about Montagne’s evening and his friends, about Doc, about parts of his past and it’s not even disheartening to hear about the life Montagne led before they knew each other, not when he’s safely encased in his strong arms and with his breath in Bandit’s hair.

He’s not tired yet so he’ll probably wait until Montagne is asleep to get back up and read something on his sofa, but there’s one last sentence with which all his illusions about not being in over his head are shattered: “I’ll give you a key tomorrow morning.”

It’s simple enough but the profound joy spreading at the words makes him realise.

Fuck, he thinks. I’m so fucking doomed.

[acabecca]

Butterfly Kisses // eventual Sweet Pea x OC - chapter two.

Notes: I posted the first part of this on a whim, it was something I wrote in like 30 minutes and I wasn’t even sure I was going write anything else for it but people seemed to like it, so... here’s part 2? It’s short but please bear with me, I’m trying to get used to actually posting fics and not just prompts. Also pls don’t judge me too much for who the dad is lol banner by @siriussblackx

masterlist

part one

Tag list: @serpentsweetspea, @drw0301bieber, @popeyetheunicorn

*

Saying a quick thank you to her Uber driver, Talia grabbed her bag and ducked out of the car, groaning when she felt her phone vibrating in her pocket for what had to have been the seventh time in the last forty minutes. Closing the car door behind her, she pulled her phone out and frowned when she saw all the missed calls were from Toni. She was about to send a message telling her friends she’d call her later, when the phone rang again and Toni’s name flashed across the screen.

Huffing loudly, Talia pressed the phone to her ear. “Toni? I’m a little busy right now, can I call you back when-”

“I spoke to Fangs.”

Talia froze, her breath catching in her throat. “O-oh?”

“Yeah…” Toni paused. “Is he telling the truth, Talia?”

“Wha- I mean, that depends on-” Talia stopped, screwing her eyes shut and taking a breath. “What did he say?” she asked weakly.

“You’re pregnant with some dude’s baby, but you don’t know who he was. It happened when we went back to Riverdale.”

“I’ll kill him,” she grumbled. “He had no right telling you, he has no right telling anyone- oh God does Sweet Pea know?” she asked, panic seizing her. “I should have been the one to tell him! I was-”

“Calm down,” Toni interrupted. “No one else knows. Fangs only told me because he’s worried, he stopped by your place and weren’t there, your neighbour told him you’d left early this morning with an overnight back and you’d asked her to keep an eye on your apartment. He was freaking out, so he called me. Plus, he thinks you might need a girl to talk to because apparently pregnancy falls under girl stuff in Fogarty’s book,” she told her with a snort. “So, where are you?”

“I’m- I’m home.”

Toni paused. “Bullshit.”

“No, I-” Talia sighed. “Not home as in, my apartment home. Home as in, back in Riverdale.”

“How come?” Toni asked, but Talia stayed quiet. “T… You do know who the dad is, don’t you?”

“…Maybe.”

“And there’s a reason you didn’t wanna tell Fangs. Christ, Talia, is it who I think it is?”

“Depends on who you think it is.”

Toni grumbled under her breath. “I think it’s someone everyone’s gonna lose their shit over. Who I left you with in the bar. It’s him, isn’t it?” she asked, and Talia’s silence was the only answer she needed. “Fuck, T! This is gonna break Sweet Pea-”

“Sweet Pea ended things with me, Toni, not the other way around,” Talia snapped. “I didn’t break his heart, he broke mine. He’s the one who said he couldn’t see a future for us and I’m the one who’s knocked up so why is everyone so damn concerned about how Sweet Pea is going to handle this? How about some of my friends being on my side for once! I made a mistake, okay? I know I did, I knew it was a mistake as soon as it was done with, a quick fumble in the back of a truck and now I’m gonna end up with an actual real life person to take care of for the rest of my life? You don’t think I know how fucked up this is? Believe me, Toni, I know. What I need right now is a bit of support from you, I don’t need you to judge me. I need you to lie to me and tell me I haven’t just ruined my life and that everything is going to be okay because I’m about to go tell this guy that I’m having his baby and I am terrified!”

She was met with silence on the other end of the phone and she paused, closing her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose as she took a few deep, shaky breaths.

“You’re right,” Toni whispered. “I’m sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry,” Talia sighed. “I just- I’m just feeling a little stressed.”

“No, you’re right. I don’t blame you. Look, I… Call me when you’ve spoken to him, alright? Does he know you’re coming?”

“No,” Talia muttered. “I texted him, he didn’t reply, but I know I can’t put it off. I couldn’t sleep last night so I booked a train ticket and got the first train here. Can you just- just tell Fangs I’m alright?”

“I will,” Toni assured her. “And please call me when you’ve spoken to him, alright? So I know if I need to kick his ass or congratulate him on being a dad.”

“Yeah I uh, I doubt he’s gonna want congratulations,” Talia laughed weakly. “And hey, Toni? Don’t… Don’t tell Fangs who it is. I should be the one to tell him.”

“Of course I won’t tell him, T,” Toni replied softly. “Just call me, okay? I love you.”

“I love you too, Topaz,” Talia whispered, pausing before she ended the call and shoved her phone back in her pocket with shaking hands. Taking a few deep breaths, Talia tried to calm herself down as she looked up at the building in front of her.

She knew he’d be inside – there were only two places in Riverdale he’d be at this time, and she’d already checked the bar. She just hoped that Pop’s would be relatively quiet given that the high school hadn’t let out yet. This wasn’t a conversation she wanted to have with a lot of people around.

Tightening her grip on the strap of her bag, Talia took a breath and pushed open the door of the diner before she could talk herself out of it. She spotted him almost immediately, leaning against the counter, a look of boredom on his face and his attention fixed on the phone he held in his hand. He looked up as she entered, the bell above the door signalling her arrival and Talia felt her cheeks flush as the corners of his mouth turned up into a smirk.

“Natalia,” he hummed softly, placing his phone down on the counter as she approached him. She almost winced at the sound of her name; he had always been one of the only people to use it and hearing it fall from his lips, she was instantly thrown back to that night in the back of his truck, her own name being whispered into as he told her how good he was going to make her feel, and whispering empty promises both of them knew he’d never keep.. “Back already?”

“I-I need to talk to you,” she stuttered nervously, dropping her back on the floor and she climbed on to one of chairs. “It’s important,” she added, and his smile slipped slightly. “It- it’s about… what happened.”

“You back for round two?” he asked with a chuckle and a raise of his eyebrows.

“I’m serious!” she snapped, and his laughter stopped as he frowned at her.

“I’m not gonna tell anyone if that’s what you’re worried about,” he shrugged. “It won’t get back to Sweet Pea. You guys back together, is that what’s got your panties in a bunch?”

“That- that’s not what this is,” Talia sighed, pushing her hands through her hair as she avoided his gaze, her stomach twisting nervously.

She bit down on her bottom lip, her hands falling on to the counter as she finally worked up the courage to look at him. He was watching her in a confusion and concern, a small, unsure smile on his face as he leaned a little closer to her. He made her nervous, he always had done. The way his dark eyes would focus solely on her, giving her his undivided attention whenever she spoke. She had been terrified of him when she was a teenager, but it was the kind of terrified that had made her feel alive, each one of her nerves tingling with excitement. She had never told anyone that, of course. Apart from Fangs, but he didn’t count. She told Fangs everything.

Talia opened her mouth to speak, but the way he was staring at her made her stop. There was something there, hidden in his eyes that made her swallow thickly. The bruises on her body from where he had gripped her hips a little too tightly and the hickies that had littered her collarbone had long since faded, but she knew the memories of that night never would and with the way he was looking at her, she knew that he remembered every single detail, too.

“Natalia, what’s wrong?” he asked as he reached out, his hand covering hers in concern when she still hadn’t spoken, and she flinched and pulled away from him.

“I’m pregnant.”

He blinked. “Congratulations? I’m sure Sweet Pea’s thrilled.”

“It’s not Sweet Pea’s,” she told him, pressing her lips together and raising her eyebrows at him, hoping he’d get what she was trying to say so she didn’t have to utter the words ‘it’s your baby’. There was silence between them and as Talia watched him, she could almost see the cogs turning in his head as his expression changed to one of realisation.

“Wha- I- me?”

“Yeah.”

“No,” he shook his head, pushing himself away from the counter. “No way. It can’t be mine.”

“Well, it is.”

“How can you be sure?” he snapped. “It was easy enough for me to get in your pants, how do I know you’re telling me the truth and you’re not just trying to pin it on me?”

Talia’s lip curled up into a snarl. “Well you’re hardly father of the year material, are you? If I was gonna pin a kid on someone, you’re the last person I’d choose!”

“Then get rid of it.”

Her breath caught in her throat, her knuckles turning white as he fingers gripped tightly on to the edge of the counter to stop herself from reaching out and slapping him. She didn’t know what she’d been expecting, but it certainly wasn’t that.

“How can you say that?” she asked in a whisper.

“Because neither of us want a kid, Natalia,” he snapped. “We’re not in a relationship, neither of us are in a position to support a kid financially.”

“And that’s your solution? Just ‘get rid’ of it?”

“Well what else do you wanna do?” he shrugged his shoulders, and Talia scowled. “…Don’t tell me you’re actually considering having it?”

Talia met his eyes, her gaze hard. “Maybe. I haven’t decided yet, that’s why I came to see you. I figured we needed to talk about it but I didn’t come here for your permission. Whatever I do, it’s gonna be my decision. You don’t have to be involved, frankly I don’t really care if you wanna be or not, I just thought you should know that you could potentially have another kid out there that might come find you one day. Then again, you’ve never really given a shit about the two you already have, huh?”

Slamming his hand down on the counter and ignoring the way she jumped and leaned away from him, he balled his hand into a fist pointed a finger at her. “Get. Rid. Of it,” he spat. “I mean it, Natalia. I want nothing to do with it, or with you. You were just a drunk hook-up, an easy lay. I didn’t sign up for this shit.”

Blinking bac angry tears, Talia grabbed her back and hopped off the stool, reaching out and shoving him backwards. “Fuck you, FP,” she snapped, throwing her bag over her shoulder and storming out of the diner.

She was half hoping, although not expecting, FP to follow her or to call after her or something, and she couldn’t help the angry tears that spilled over and rolled down her cheeks as she walked the once familiar road away from Pop’s. She reached up to wipe her eyes, not looking where she was going and gasping slightly when she collided with someone’s chest.

“I’m so sorry, I wasn’t watching where I was going-”

“Talia?”

Sniffling, Talia looked up through her tears, smiling weakly at the person in front of her. “Joaquin. Hey.”

“Hi,” Joaquin smiled in confusion. “What are you doing back in town? Are the guys with you?” he asked, his expression quickly turning to one of concern when he took in her watery eyes and trembling lip. “Hey. What’s wrong?” he asked, putting his hands on her shoulders and pulling her towards him.

Talia tried to hold herself together for all of five seconds, but she couldn’t. She let Joaquin pull her into his arms, burying her face in his chest, and she cried.

[ruins-in-rome]

We sit in a round table, a spotlight illuminating the center. A toddler, too young to even know what’s happening, her future on the table. A man bound by dedication, and… devotion (could it be love?), his stability on the table. Me… An adolescent with confusion in her eyes, heart torn apart between two worlds (for what?), my… growth and relationship on the table. I bet a lot of questions, I gave up knowledge, and put it on the table. A woman, tied to her chair, hands held up by strings, her… everything is on the table. An elderly woman, wearing the tragedy and comedy mask on, one of her hands holding the control paddle which I assume is what controls the other woman, the other hand is tied to a bunch of other people at the back. This woman doesn’t have anything on the table. How can that be? Is she a coward to refuse to gamble? There are spectators. Men in black suits, and women in cocktail dresses wear masks to cover their eyes, the same malicious smiles and smug smirks plastered on their lips. Is this some sort of show? There are a handful with scowls imprinted on their faces, teeth grazing lips as if holding back a snarl, eyes narrowed, and jaws clenched. Why are they so angry? At the heart of it all, there’s a revolver, a silent beckoning, “let’s play a game, shall we?”

The first to go is the woman. It’s funny how to puppet gains the will to go. But really, when has the master get on their bare hands and do the dirty work? She takes the gun with no hesitation, as if she has been wanting this – to put an end to everything. She loads the bullet. She spins the cylinder. She points it to her head and pulls the trigger.

She looks up to face me, mouthing the words, ‘I’m sorry.’ I am thrown into more confusion. Why has she said that? What did she do? This is the first time I’ve seen her features: stray grey hairs frame her face, almost too dry lips, cracked cheeks – must be from the dried tears, eyes lined with the color red – she has been crying. Time hasn’t been kind, but so was she. There is her beauty mark in between the hairs of her eyebrows and I knew. It was a normal day in my normal life with my normal family when my mother barged in the room and hugged us tight. She had said some cryptic words that I didn’t know the meaning of. Was she going to die? Where is she going? What happened? But at the thought that she will leave, I let myself cry. Even my sibling, who didn’t know anything, but felt the misery in the air, came to hug us. I didn’t even know the story but I cried. It was a day in my life with my family when we held each other and cried.

Just like waterfalls, the water continues to cascade down, splashing on the rocks with sounds that hurt the ears. In this tiny room, the shouts begin. Shouts of a grown man, insults thrown by the same man, the harsh whispers of the women draped in riches, eyes of jewels, and tongues of snakes – they all feel like a door slammed closed, leaving you in a suffocating room. The woman is silent. She is choking on her sobs. The shouts always fill the house. It makes me think that they are just filling up the space inside. Every other day is like this, and I don’t know what to do anymore. Hidden away in the safety of my own room, I can hear the words coming out of a man’s mouth like bullets. He drops bombs on her like she is a battlefield. What are you fighting for? Why are we going to war? I wonder if she can even feel the eyes on her, or the words directed at her. I want to hold her and tell her that I’m here, she can lean on me when the world seems against her.

The man is the second to go. His eyes rest on me when he pulls the trigger. His eyes are devoid of any emotions, but I want to ask him, why, simply why, why are you doing this, why are you continuing to do this? And yes, I do remember. The story is like an origami crane. It has too many folds and too many sides. But… the first to unfold the story to me is my father.

My room is my safe haven. The white walls paired with bright colors made the whole room come to life. It is filled with my memories, little trinkets to decorate my desks, words painted on the walls, my dreams and my hopes and my ambitions and my achievements all out in the open. There are pieces of me everywhere. There are pieces of everyone in the little things in my room. The little magnet given by a friend, a portrait drawn by my best friend, candies I haven’t eaten because of the words on them, keychains from my previous teachers, a t-shirt as remembrance for either my best or worst years – an origami star. And that day, there was a moment added to the room of mine with every little and big thing that captures a moment in my life. My father went in my room, sat down in the brown chair I’ve sat when I felt I needed to think – maybe this is what we needed: to think. His first words were, “I know that you want to know.” My first words were, “I know.” ‘I’ve put the pieces together, papa’ was left unsaid. And he did tell me everything.

When I was a child, I never believed that money made the world go ‘round. I was taught to be practical, reasonable, logical. I was taught when a mass is trapped in the gravitational field of another body, a set of equations from Johann Kepler tell us that certain stable orbits can result. When this happens, as is the case with our planet, the momentum that the planet had continues until something steels it away. So wasn’t it conservation of angular momentum? But… On that day, at 2 in the afternoon when my curtains were draped, my world suddenly stopped. And on that day, I realized I was wrong. Money made the world go ‘round. Debts mean that your world will be turned upside down – our world is turned upside down. The story almost flew over my head because I chose to hold on to the raw emotions of some of his commentaries.

“I’m trying to fix the broken pieces but she keeps breaking them.” There is a static silence. And silence can only hold so much. The man cries. I don’t know if it’s for relief or for anger.

I look at the people around me. I know the woman and the man’s sides. The people around is another story. Their laughs fill my ears and I can’t help but think that it’s mockery. I stare at a woman, her mouth in a straight line, and her brows furrowed. She is pitying us. I don’t need your sympathy, lady. The lady and her groupie looks at the woman in both pity and anger. They are seeing her as a villain. The women clad in dresses call out her name in reminder. Money, money, money. The men wearing fancy suits places their hands on the man’s shoulder. Some hold their own knives and guns behind their back, a sign of betrayal for the man. The others offer their hand in front of the man, giving him genuine help to get back up to his feet. But just like my father said, when the foundation for a new start is done, someone ends up knocking them over. I don’t know which side I should be on. I stick with holding both of the woman and man’s hands, an unspoken phrase, “I’m here.”

The next is the old woman in the mask. She effortlessly points the revolver to her head, like she has done this so many times that it doesn’t affect her anymore, like she just knows she won’t die. She keeps her face straight forward. Her comedy mask taunts me. Is this fun to you, woman? When she eventually fires the gun, it shoots somebody else in the room. Their cries echo out into the room and that’s when I noticed that the gun isn’t directly pointing on her head – it’s angled ever so slightly that it misses her… and ends up taking someone else’s life instead. Her tragedy mask jeer at me. You of all people shouldn’t mourn over the deceased when you yourself were the reason behind it. I glare at her with hardened eyes, fury dancing like fire. That’s when it all clicked. The mastermind of it all. The master, the controller, the one working behind the scenes, manipulating the game in order to work in her favour, is that old hag.

In the many memories of my father and I talking, the blurred visions in my mind, his eyes holding so much pain and sadness, the mechanical cogs in my brain tossing and turning, trying to make sense of everything, the crack in his voice, my silence as an urge for him to continue – to let it all out, his frustrations, his sorrows, his worries, and oh, his defeat, the bitter defeat that came with it all, there is one person that unraveled the threads in our family tapestry. Maybe… maybe this is part of our fate. Maybe in between the threads that hold the tapestry together, there was a person – a termite, a parasite disentangling the threads.

The story starts with her. We all knew of her money problems long before we have been thrown into the mix. She’s always running around, looking for people, asking them for money. With every large sum of money withdrawn, she is slowly digging her own grave, eventually falling into hell. This witch, suffering in her own form of Tartarus, decided it was too lonely and came back into the mortal realm to find someone to accompany her in her eternal damnation. I know how important it is to seek for guidance, for assistance – it’s healthy to know when to ask for help and to accept that help. But I also know that after we are helped, we have to learn. We have to learn to crawl back up to the surface, to finally breathe the fresh air. Now what did she do? She, with her vice-like grip. She, with her pleading eyes. She, with her begging. She, with her convincing act of the victim. And her. When people, innocent people go into the wrong crowds, falling for the false promises those people made, they can’t help but try it. “It’s going to be successful, I promise!” “We’ll be rich in no time!” “I have already planned this out, so there’s no way it’s going to fail!” Sometimes… the lines between obligation and love blur as one, and you think it’s for love, but what you feel is that you’re indebted to others, that you need to do this thing for them in order to repay them for every good thing they have for you. Her, with the shattering resolve. Her, with the same blood as the witch’s that courses through her veins. Her, with the thought of “I love you and love means sacrificing.” Her… with the feeling of “You have raised me and you have given up heart and soul for me, so I will gladly ruin myself for you.”

This crone in front of me, sitting in a chair of both needles and roses – I don’t care if you’re in pain – do you feel sorry for what you did? I know you are hurting as well, but isn’t this your own doing? I couldn’t care less. You have ruined our lives. When they think their children aren’t listening, the shouting starts. The walls hear them; they tell me what the adults are talking about. The days pass with tension in the air. There are unanswered questions hanging in the air, “what happens next? Is someone going to leave? Will you change? Will you forgive me?” I am made the messenger, delivering commands from opposite sides of the war. You have ruined your daughter’s image. Women circle her like predators; your daughter has her head held up high, and her body shaking. Women are throwing arrows at her heart; your daughter becomes merely a shell of what she used to be. Women are angry for the delayed payments; your daughter’s mind is breaking. You have ruined my father. As a lover, he gives and he gives, and he gives and he gives… until there is nothing left for himself. Mother shoots him in his heart. You are behind her, guiding her hands. His blood, his lifeline spills out. He thinks he has made a fool of himself and yet he himself takes out his heart and offers it. ‘It’s not enough,’ is what you think. You have ruined my mother. The world has turned against her. The people she has helped has crossed her, leaving more headaches for her. On the rare occasion that I stare at my mother, I think, “time moves on.” She looks older. There are eye bags under her eyes, a few more gray hairs – why aren’t there any laugh lines? She’s always tired now, too. I know she just wants rest now. I think, everyone needs it. And I guess, you can’t make emotional labour and mental stress disappear.

The gun slides over the table; it stops right in front of me. Oh, it’s my turn now. There is a new bullet in one of the chambers of the revolver. What does all of this mean to me? Why am I somehow connected to this web of lies? I pull the trigger.

Somehow, with my luck, it was like Pluto passing directly behind Jupiter, in relation to the earth. They all lined up and their combined gravitational force exerts a stronger tidal pull, which would temporarily counteract gravity here on earth. And I’m floating. I feel like I’m floating. These planets aligned themselves like how the loaded chamber aligned with the primer percussion mechanism and the barrel – the weapon is discharged. I imagine the bullet to be a beautiful comet, passing through me, and landing into something else – someone else. It was the toddler. What a beautiful tragedy. I meet the eyes of the people inside this room. They are filled with panic in the audience, madness in the man’s, shame in the woman’s, and is that guilt in the old woman’s? She doesn’t have the right to feel guilty.

I know why the chambers didn’t align with the others. It was because of their actions that led to this – the children dying. I know why the toddler has the future bet on the table. My sister is robbed of the future that I had the privilege to experience– the weekend getaways, the overflowing amount of toys, the endless support to try new things, the unstrained relationship with the other side of the family, the absence of worries, and… the atmosphere of true love between partners in a home.

The adults may not feel the direct attack of the actions, only dragging themselves through the battlefield, but we… the future generation, (is there even a future?), can feel the aftereffects of the nuclear bomb that has been dropped on us. The men and women here might have been atlas holding the world on their shoulders, but we are Andromeda, the chained princess, an offered sacrifice for the peace of everyone else.

I know why the shattered pieces of my heart and mind are on the table. On the other side, I’m walking on a tight rope; my back turned from the past, and walking to the unknown future. I hold a pole in my hands, my father’s side on the right, and my mother’s side on the left. Despite being on opposing sides, the outcome is the same: I fall to my doom. Despite going in the direction of what lies ahead, my head is held down, and my legs are wobbling on the thinning rope of my relationships. I – we – are in a dilemma. It is an unstoppable force – the criticism and judgmental thoughts thrown, the pleas of my father to think of us for the first time, the heavy tension carried in the silence versing an immovable object – the stubbornness of my mother, the unrelenting voice of my grandmother, both of their wills to make amends with the victims of their crime. Mother hasn’t stopped helping. Her golden heart will be the death of her. Father hasn’t stopped covering the holes my mother has left. His commitment is the bane of his existence. Mother tries to stitch my thread back into her side of the family. I have to sit through the occasions with the old hag. Perhaps I can make use of the comedy mask here. I have to be the perfect innocent doll, a smile plastered on my face, voice sickening sweet as if nothing is wrong. Mother looks at me with unspoken instructions, “please be nice.” How do you say “thank you” to the person who turned the fire inside my family into dying embers? How do I stay with the person who turned my little peaceful kingdom into ruins only told in legends and myths?

Blood drips down my head – I’m feeling kind of dizzy. My sister is matching the same expression as I have. This is it, this is the aftermath of the war. This is the consequences of their actions. And there is nothing good that happens in war. Only pain. Only sadness. Only guilt. Only regret. What good has come from this game? I learned the bloody truth. But in this game… we are infinitely waiting for our time when the stars align, and everything ends. This is a losing battle, everyone’s guns are at each other, hands around each other, ready to kill. In my dying breaths, I look around the room once more, the light illuminates the darkness that was once ignorance, and for the first time, I see them fully. My sister, her future taken away from her, sits beside me, covered in her own blood. My father, his devotion still drives him to move on, has his head in his hands, questioning where we had gone wrong. I take his hand and tell him, “It’s okay, I’m still here and I thank you.” My mother, the promise that everything will be okay maybe fades away, and I take her hand in mine, “I still love you,” slips out of my mouth in the softest voice. Grandmother, still in the safety of anonymity, lurks in the shadows, still following us. I place a kiss on the crown of my sister’s forehead. Everything is in fast pace, everything is chaos, and I’m left to wonder, is this how we fall apart?

[some-sort-of-sidewalk-slam]

The Big Wrestle Kingdom 12 Thoughts Post

Some spoiler-free thoughts before we get into specifics under the cut. I thought it was an overall excellent show. This is the second Wrestle Kingdom I've ever watched, and while I thought 11 was better, I still think this is probably going to be the best wrestling show of the year, and I feel sorry for the Royal Rumble having to follow it later this month. I thought the undercard matches, especially the various tag matches, were better than 11's, but the major singles bouts were not quite as good. I did like the end of the main event because it makes me curious and interested for the future, and it was also just a fantastic match to boot. The Junior Heavyweight Championship four-way match was probably my favorite of the night, though the NEVER Openweight Championship and United States Championship came damn close to being my favorites. I wouldn't say there were any bad matches on the card per se, but a couple of them were disappointing for various reasons, which I'll get into in the spoilery section. Considering this was a four hour show (five if you include the pre-show rumble, which I didn't watch), I was entertained the whole way through, which is no small feat. Get New Japan World and watch this show.

I'm going to go through this match-by-match, and give a sort of general summary at the end.

Match 1: Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Championships- Roppongi 3K vs The Young Bucks

I should note that I'm generally not a fan of the Bucks, but they really impressed me here. Sho and Yo are a team I'm not super familiar with but I saw two of their matches before this and I was on board with them almost immediately. So I was expecting this match to be like... fine. Not great, but not bad. Just fine. But color me surprised, this is probably the best Young Bucks match I've ever seen. They set up a storyline pretty early in the match where one member of each team had a back injury and they would struggle with doing certain moves that require a lot of lifting. It's simple stuff but it's effective nonetheless. The only downside I found is the result. I'm not sure The Young Bucks needed a 7th run with the belts this soon, and I feel like they were wasting some of the momentum that Roppongi 3K had built from their strong debut. I only hope that this is the start of a larger feud that sees Sho and Yoh reclaiming the belts.

Match 2: NEVER Openweight Six-man Tag Team Championship Gauntlet Match 

This match was a mess, but a fun one. It's still one my least favorite matches on the card, mostly because it doesn't feel like a lot of care went into the booking. Trent getting the pin was a good for him and a good sign that his transition into the heavyweight division is going to go pretty well, but he didn't actually do a lot of wrestling. I mostly remember him breaking up a lot of pins. It was nice to see War Machine again, especially considering it's rumored that this is their last match with New Japan. Wasn't crazy about them teaming with Elgin, though. Like, visually it makes sense but ever since I read the news that he's a dong in real life, I've gotten real hesitant to watch him. I also don't feel like Suzuki-Gun brought their A-game. Aside from finding Zack Sabre Jr. a boring wrestler, I feel like they should have maybe replaced Iizuka with El Desperado or something to have some more athleticism. Also a side note: in the graphic for Taguchi's team, it said David Finlay was on the team, whereas it was actually Juice Robinson in that spot.

Match 3: Cody vs Kota Ibushi Special Match

I think this is my least favorite match on the card, which kind of hurt because Kota Ibushi is in it. I put this mostly on Cody's shoulders, who has slowly started to become one of the most embarrassing acts on the indies. He left WWE with all the hype in the world, and everyone was so excited to see the creativity and in-ring prowess that he wasn't allowed to show. But then he just sort of became a cog in the Bullet Club machine, who is a shockingly average wrestler, and gets pissy at Roman Reigns on Twitter. Brandi calling everyone who doesn't think she's the most attractive woman in wrestling “marks” while on the way to the ring really set the scene for this slightly mediocre match with an admittedly impressive Cross Rhodes off the apron onto the floor. If you can't have a good match with Kota frigging Ibushi at goddamn Wrestle Kingdom, you might not be as good as you say you are, Cody.

Match 4: IWGP Tag Team Championship- Killer Elite Squad vs EVIL and SANADA

I wasn't super hot for this match in the beginning. Lance Archer and Davey Boy Smith Jr. are both really big dudes who are excellent at being dominant powerhouses, which was definitely the case in this match. I do admit to being slightly annoyed at how long SANADA spent on his back while Archer and Davey Boy kicked the hell out of him. SANADA and EVIL's strengths are sudden explosions of athleticism, which was good counter to KES's slow style. SANADA and EVIL didn't get to do as much as I would have liked in this match, but they got some great moments to shine, and I think putting the title on them was a good move.

Match 5: NEVER Openweight Championship Hair vs Hair Match- Minoru Suzuki vs Hirooki Goto

This match was rad from start to finish. There wasn't a lot of flashy stuff in it, but flashy is not the strong suit of either of these guys. This was an old-fashioned, no-nonsense fight. Minoru Suzuki looked like the monster he is, coming out of most exchanges on top. But slowly but surely, Goto managed to make comeback after comeback. It's a pretty simple story of an underdog overcoming a powerful adversary, but as I said before, simple storytelling works. The whole match was stiff and powerful, as expected, and they told a hell of a story through the match. It built to an excellent crescendo of Goto hitting a backwards and then a proper GTR for a well-earned victory. I also very much enjoyed the moment where Suzuki walked away from his faction to shave his own hair. It's a character-defining moment that shows that even sadistic heels like Minoru Suzuki still have a sense of honor.

Match 6: IWGP Junior Heavyweight Championship Four-Way Match- Marty Scurl vs Will Ospreay vs KUSHIDA vs Hiromu Takahashi

This is probably my favorite match of the night. It was fast-paced, exciting, full of storytelling, and had some frankly ridiculous spots. I loved watching the storylines between KUSHIDA and Hiromu, Ospreay and Scurl, and even Ospreay and Kushida, all woven through this match, with a sprinkling of excellently devious heel tactics from Scurl. Seeing what he's capable of, I refuse to believe that Will Ospreay is a human being. He has to be some sort of human/cat hybrid or something. Seeing KUSHIDA incorporate some of Hiromu's moves into his own is a great callback to their feud. Probably my favorite moment was the brief unspoken alliance between Ospreay and Scurl. I think I would have preferred Scurl to retain here, but I would have been 100% fine with anyone winning this match, and I think this way Opsreay and Scurl can continue to have a one-on-one feud, which is always exciting.

Match 7: IWGP Intercontinental Championship- Hiroshi Tanahashi vs Switchblade Jay White

I missed the build to this match but the video package did a decent job explaining the kayfabe reason for this match. What I can't understand is the out-of-kayfabe reason for it. His character is supposed to be an assassin of some kind? Or at least some sort of violent dude with a knife fetish. I do like that he's not part of any factions. It helps sell the lone wolf thing he's got going on. But once he takes off the leather coat and knife necklace, he just sort of looks like a scrawny dweeb. He just doesn't have the experience to carry a big feud like this yet. They want to make Jay White a big deal right off the bat by putting him up against Tanahashi at Wrestle Kingdom but I had a really hard time believing it. He's a pretty good in-ring worker, and he had some pretty good smack-talk in the ring, but this was not a Wrestle Kingdom-worthy performance.

Match 8: IWGP United States Heavyweight Championship No Disqualification Match- Kenny Omega vs Chris Jericho

This was probably the biggest draw for most of us Western fans. To see Chris Jericho in a New Japan Pro Wrestling ring, and wrestling one of the greatest wrestlers of all time, was something we all wanted to see. And... I wish I liked it more than I did. Don't get me wrong, I thought it was very good, and the biggest reason that I wasn't a fan of it wasn't the fault of the performers or the match. I'm just generally not a fan of weapons and hardcore brawls, which the first part of this match definitely was. I understand that it was an important part of the match's story that needed to happen. It's Jericho's American brawling style contrasted with the second half of the match, which was done in Omega's cleaner Japanese style. Despite the stuff I didn't like about it, it was still a phenomenal match that told an awesome story.

Match 9: IWGP Heavyweight Championship- Kazuchika Okada vs Tetsuya Naito

The one for all the marbles. This match had a lot to live up to, having to not only follow last year's 6-star main event, but also the four-year build of the Tetsuya Naito storyline development. This one was a conflicting one.  First thing's first: it was not better than last year's main event, but that was going to be hard to top so I'm not holding that against it. The match was excellent in its own right. I watched it in stunned silence as it built to its crescendo, watch two of the best wrestlers in the world go at each other. But the finish was conflicting. On one hand, it felt like it made narrative sense for Naito to finally win the belt at Wrestle Kingdom, as a glorious payoff for a four-year storyline, and having Okada retain instead feels kind of like wasted potential. On the other hand, the impression I get from the promo Okada gave after the match, and the way Naito smiled as he walked away from the match is that this story is not over. I, personally, thought the ending was fine. If nothing else, it intrigued me for what's coming next.

Wrap up

Wrestle Kingdom 12 was a spectacular show. It had some hiccups, as all wrestling shows generally do. I enjoyed 11 more because I liked its last three matches better. But 12 had better undercard matches, and I understood more of the stories going into it because I've actually been watching some of the stuff leading up to it. If nothing else, this confirms to me without a doubt that New Japan is the best wrestling in the world. The match quality is so high, the stories so effectively told, even in a language that I don't speak. Pro wrestling is so goddamn cool, and New Japan is the best place to watch it. If there was anything you wanted to convince you, let this be it. Start watching New Japan Pro Wrestling. It's so worth your time.