#he had a bad psychotic break the other night and just started to have another

[sobsboy]

It's really hard when in the middle of an episode your partner suddenly forgets who you are, what time, day, and year it is...

[zaine-m]

Modern university Au and Caitlyn's Very Bad semester

She was a straight A legacy student majoring in poli sci (forced to by her parents)

Caitlyn and Vi have been dating since first year

At the start of the second year her mother was killed in a car accident

Jinx had found Silco dead and in a bit of a psychotic episode and not knowing what else to do decided to go for a drive and drove through a stop sign, hitting and killing Cassandra

Caitlyn was distraught and decided to start an emotional support group on campus for people who've lost someone close to them with Vi's help

That's where she met Loris, Steb and Maddie

Loris lost his father at a young age to cancer and his mother more recently to suicide

In her note she said that she'd just been holding out till Loris was away at university and didn't need on her anymore

That really broke him up, especially because he did still need her deeply

Steb and Maddie both recently lost a close friend, Daisy to suicide

Maddie and Daisy started dating a few months before her passing

They were both closer to Daisy than each other but after her passing they bonded a lot over their shared grief

Along with processing their grief together they worked on anti-suicide and safe driving campaigns around campus

Eventually Jinx's trial comes around and she gets let free with no charges but some mandatory counseling

As she was in a psychotic episode her reckless driving was not seen as her fault so they didn't charge her

This really upsets Caitlyn but vi is happy her sister isn't being sent to jail

"how, how could they just let her walk away free? she killed my mother"

"come on Cait, you know she never wanted to hurt anyone. She had just lost her father, she wasn't in the right mind space"

"how could you defend her like that"

Cait slaps her in the face and they break up

Caitlyn continues running the group but a lot of people leave as she starts creating a more toxic environment with a lot of trauma comparisons and subtle shaming if she feels like that person didn't do enough to try to save their loved one or didn't mourn their loved one enough

Loris leaves with Vi and helps her through her stint of skipping all her classes and spending every night at some party or another

Caitlyn and Maddie end up getting together but Maddie quickly becomes manipulative in a way that hard for Caitlyn to see because Cait's also being an asshole

Caitlyn slowly starts to realize how bad she's being for the group but is pretty stuck in her situation because whenever she tries to talk to Maddie about it she'll either make an excuse for their actions or get angry that Caitlyn might be calling her a bad person

Eventually she goes to apologize to Vi and things go over pretty smoothly

Vi understands why she said that with all the grief she felt and agrees to come back to the support group to try to start making it a better environment again

Vi also doesn't have any hard feelings about Caitlyn moving on and dating Maddie, saying that that's just how things are in university

Maddie gets really upset when Vi comes back

Caitlyn tries to smooth over her fears but to be fair they are making eyes at each other during a lot of the meetings

Eventually Maddie loses it one night and smashes a bottle over Caitlyn's head before hitting her with it, doing serious damage to her eye

Maddie leaves her there bleeding for the night and Caitlyn decides to try to sneak out

She calls Vi sobbing on a street corner

"S-something happened, I need you"

"Cait, it's okay, just take a deep breath okay? What happened"

"god, I-I can't explain. I think I need to go to the hospital"

"okay, where are you? I'll pick you up"

"I'm at the corner of fourth and Stanwick... I fucked up Vi"

"no, you didn't"

"no... no... I did, I pushed you away. I fucked up all our work with the support group"

"that can all be fixed"

"god, I slapped you right in the face"

"you were grieving"

"...Maddie was a mistake"

*chuckled* "come on, is she really that bad in bed?"

*Vi arrives to find her covered in blood on a street corner* "oh my god..."

"she... she..."

"It's okay. This wasn't your fault, okay?"

"...okay" *Vi helps Caitlyn into the car*

Once Caitlyn is feeling a bit better they call Loris and Steb into the hospital

Loris always felt iffy about Maddie and this just confirmed his suspicions

Steb is hurt to learn that Maddie had been manipulating him but very much believes her and gets incredibly distraught realizing how the timing with Daisy's suicide lined up and that Maddie might have contributed to that

Caitlyn has a really hard time coming out of the relationship and dealing with losing her eye

She fails a class for the first time that semester

Vi helps her a lot through it, the feelings are still there between them but they both know it's not a good time for them to start dating

Loris and Steb on the other hand just show up one day with a noticeably different energy between them and Vi immediately calls out "you two fucked!"

After Cait eye socket fully heals she gets really into artificial eyes with designs, she gets one with her family's crest on it with a bit of her mom's ashes in it, one that's gold and blue to match most of her outfits, one that has part of a bullet in it

[twistedshipper]

Did you share anything about "Burning Till You're Cold"? Because if not, I want to hear! :)

Thank you, Jacquelyn! I'm so excited that you asked me about this fic, as it's one that's been simmering in the back of my mind for a long time now (and one I hope to focus on once I finish SL).

The idea for the fic is actually older than SL and, unlike the other wips I have, is set in the verse of spn but without anything overtly supernatural; it's just the characters facing their real world struggles.

The fic is about Dean in his early twenties trying to look out after Sam and himself after the difficult upbringing they've had under John's roof since their mother died.

I'm not sure about much of the plot but I have the first chapter written. In it Dean takes a drive out of Lawrence to clear his head and winds up at a dive called Harvelle's (which is located closer to Lawrence than in the show), where he meets Jo, who likewise, has her own fair share of struggles (similar to the show she dropped out of school because she didn't belong there and is helping her mom out at the bar), and the two hit it off.

Other things about the fic is that Sam (like in s7) is a psych ward patient (and is inpatient at the start of the fic), going in and out of the hospital ever since his first psychotic break while he was away at school at Stanford (which I'm very attached to as an idea as it's inspired from the show as much as my own experiences).

There's also this dark undercurrent in the fic that deals with themes of abuse which would be a major spoiler to share here so I won't. Instead I'll leave some snippets from the first chapter:

It was his first time getting wasted (publicly, that was, and without company) and it was his first time at this bar, located at the outskirts of his hometown of Lawrence, Kansas, dead set in the middle of the U.S. Why he came here as opposed to his usual haunts, he didn’t really know, other than that creeping feeling on his skin that told him he wanted the hell out of home and anything that reminded him of the stench and stain of that old house, its memories: the good, the bad, and the ugly, all of it.  He so desperately wanted out, that in a flash of recklessness, one would call impulse, he stole his father’s keys as he lay passed out on the couch senseless and took his wheels, telling himself to keep on driving until he crossed the city limits.

Well, he didn’t get that far. He saw the flickering neon lights beckoning out to him from the roadside and on another whim, thought he’d pull in for a drink. He certainly deserved one after the last few days, even though a part of him felt guilty for the indulgence, knowing full well that his kid brother wasn’t flying so high and free.

Not that Dean was either; if anything, he was running, running from his family, his problems, his responsibilities, that weight he carried inside himself, pressing hazardously into his chest. Was it too much to ask for one night just to lose himself?  Like all those nights his father lost himself in drink?  A part of him felt hesitant, afraid even to become the man, but well, these were desperate times, times that called for desperate measures.  So going on nothing but gut, as he ever did, he pulled into the lot, parked, and pushed his way through the double doors into a haze of smoke and sorrows potentially worse than his own.

And here's an interaction between Dean and Jo (because I love them so much):

“What about you?” she asked after a pause.  “Why are you here on a cold Thursday night in November?”

“Ahh,” he began fumbling for words.  “You really don’t want to know.”

“Try me,” she said. 

He bit his lip.  “Well, it’s a tough situation,” he said, repeating her choice of word.  “You see my brother…” he suddenly stopped himself, shook his head.  “I don’t know if I should tell you this, but, um, he’s…” he turned away then, scared that he might just break down and cry in front of her, this girl he only just met.  He had to gather himself and quickly. 

“He’s okay, right?” he heard her ask, from where she stood, huddled in his jacket that dwarfed her.

“Yeah,” he said turning back to face her.  “Of course, he’s fine.  Totally.  But you know, it’s my responsibility to look out for him, and sometimes that’s hard.”

He stopped himself and caught her watching him with a look all her own.  “What?” he said.

“It’s nothing,” she said.  “Just…”

She was about to speak when suddenly an old pickup pulled up, bathing the two of them with its headlights. 

“Is that…?” she asked instead.

“Yeah, that’s him,” Dean said with an awkward wave towards Bobby who looked miffed in the driver’s seat. 

“Here, let me give you this back,” she said quickly, taking off the jacket and handing it to him.

He took it from her gently and she went back to crossing her arms, to protect herself from the cold.  “Thanks,” he said.  “You better get back inside.”

“Yeah,” she said, smiling slightly, “and you better not keep him waiting.”

“Right,” he said, and turned to hop in the passenger seat.

“Oh, and Dean?”

He dropped his hand from the latch, turning back to face her.  “Yeah?”

“Take care of yourself, won’t you?”

He nodded.  In the moment it was all that he could do.

Bobby beeped the horn.

And the moment, whatever it was between them, was over.  He opened the truck door and shuffled in, and in the span of time it took him to fasten his seatbelt, she was already slipping through the front doors of the bar, as a pair of men came stumbling out.  A part of him, however drunk and senseless, hoped she would turn back and wave at him, but the door shut behind her and she was safe inside and warm.

So much for that, he thought.  Now it was time to face the situation at hand and he expected Bobby to smack him upside the head and yell at him for taking his dad’s car all the way out in the middle of nowhere only to get smashed stupid.

But Bobby didn’t speak right away as they pulled out of Harvelle’s Roadhouse and onto the road and that’s when Dean looking back at the old dive noticed that a light snow had begun to fall, each flake glittering under the streetlamps like a tiny iridescent star.

Thank you again for asking me about this fic. (I was hoping someone would.) You've reignited my interest in it and now I'm just craving to write it, haha. ❤

[our-neighbours-cat-is-a-menace]

Reader making BNHA boys jealous

Boys included: Midoriya, Bakugo, and Dabi,

Midoriya

You are heartless, why would you do this to him

He has always been a caring cinnamon roll to you, always checking if your ok and if you have a bad day, he'll listen to you rant

You never actually seen Izuku get jealous, cause you never give him the reason to, but today some devil (mina) coerced you to prank him

And the devil just had to pick the prank that involves you reminiscing about your ex infront of him

You are currently on your way to his dorm room to spend some time together

When you arrived at his doorstep, he was quick to let you in and give you that heartwarming smile of his

"So what do you wanna do?" he asked, obviously excited to have some alone time with you

"Let's continue watching one piece, let's binge from the wholecake arc to wano" you said, matching his enthusiasm

You guys were currently watching one piece, while big mom's backstory was playing, your phone dinged

You already know it was mina, pestering you about the prank

You were busy typing back at her that you didn't notice izuku already staring at you

"Yn, who's that" he inquired

"it's just mina"

"i see, what did she say?"

You decided this was the moment to start this petty prank

"Oh, she's just talking about how my ex looked hot in his instagram pics" you said, as nonchalantly as possible

"do you think he's hot too?" he asked gently, already not liking where this is going

"huh, oh yeah, he looks hot i guess, i mean he looked good when we were together but i guess he just got another glow up" you said tapping your jaw, acting as if you're reminiscing your memories together

Izuku gently took your hand from your jaw and made you look at him

"i don't like it"

"huh"

" i don't like it when you talk about other guys like that, i know you love me but i can't help and be -"

"jealous" you interrupted, feeling a grin coming to your face

"yeah that" he quickly embraced you, inhaling your scent, loving the way you pat his back

After a minute of just embracing each other, you spoke up about how it was a prank mina told you to do

He quickly propped himself out of the hug and just stare at your stupid grin

God he loves you

Dabi

Seriously where did you have the balls to turn all his invitations down just to go hang out with toga

He asked you for a dinner date, a movie date, a walk in the park, going to the aquarium heck he even invited you to an amusement park

Yet you just always say that you made plans with toga

He had an idea that this was your petty revenge after he turned down your idea of putting him in a maid dress

He needs to preserve his dignity damnit

Toga went crazy in collecting blood while she was in your company and eventhough it's straight up psychotic, who cares

"If you grip that glass any harder, it'll break" shiggy said to the dabi who was from top to bottom irritated

"should i just kill toga" he dangerously said

Shigaraki wants to believe he was just joking but those eyes he has now just screams murder

When you and toga returned home that night, you quickly locked eyes with twice who wasted no time pointing towards Dabi who is gulping down on his 15th glass of booze

Sighing, you went to him, tapping his shoulders to gain his attention and sitting beside him

"so did you have fun?" he asked, his voice lower than my height

He was staring at you like he's gonna strangle you if you gave the wrong answer

"i did" you say grabbing the booze in his hand and gulping it down

"i see, so you had fun with someone else while your boyfriend is just here moping around because his girl decided to decline all his invites" he said, now completely growling at you

You're currently fighting the grin that wanna come out, you are hell as sure that would just add fuel to the fire

"so now, you think this is funny" wasting no time he threw you on his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, trudging his way towards his room

"Dabi put ne down"

"no!, if you wanna switch from a dick to a pussy, you should have just said so"

"what the fuck"

Closing the door to his bedroom, he plopped you in between him and the door just towering over you

" you better behave doll"

"if you admit that you were jealous, i might" you teased

Well, that did not go as planned, cause now, you woke up totally wrecked from last nights intense bed training

"was it that hard to admit you were jealous" you shouted smacking the pillow on your boyfriend's face

But he caught it

" to think you still have this much energy, let's start round one again shall we" he said hovering over you again

"nooooooooooooo"

Twice and Shiggy: Awe they made up

Bakugo

Say goodbye to your phone darling

You and him are currently cuddling with his head on your chest while you were playing with your phone

You decided to tick your angry pomeranian so you went to youtube, played a video of constant messages ringtones

Katsuki was just enjoying the moment when your stupid phone decided to ruin it with it's constant message notifications

You acted like you were typing, trying to fool the blonde

He was glaring at you

"Yn, who's that?"

"hmm nobody"

"No nobody would bombard you with messages like that"

"You're just being paranoid"

Not getting through you with words, he quickly moved his hands to grab your phone but you kept it out of reach

Now what could you be hiding

He quickly got himself in position in your bed, ready to tackle the phone out of your hand

It took a agood 2 minutes before he actually got it from your stubborn ass

When he saw that the notification sounds were from a video in youtube, he yeeted it to the opposite part of the room

"WHAAA katsuki, my phone" you immediately tried to stand up but was stop with a pair of arms wrapping around your torso keeping you in place

"it's fine.....probably, go check it later"

He has no intention of letting that one slide, you have to spoon him for like two hours while constantly worried about the state of your phone

You deserve to have a taste of anxiety woman, don't you know how much his heart clenched when he thought you had another guy chatting you up

A/N: This is my first Bnha hc and forgive me for any mistakes and i hope you guys like reading it

Masterlist🌻

[chocominnie]

One Last Time 06 —  Pjm. (M)

⇢ pairing: Jimin X Reader

⇢ Genre: Idol!Jimin, Exbf!Jimin, model!reader, sad au, fluff, tons of smut, angst

⇢ Synopsis: Your idol ex boyfriend Jimin cheated on you. You two have been broken up for a while now and the media has been keeping track of you and him. You’re trying to get over him, but the things that happen inbetween makes you re-think the entire breakup, and so does Jimin…

⇢ Song : xxxxx

⇢ Word Count : 3k

⇢ Warnings: dominant jimin, makeout sessions, this is honestly a sad angsty au, cheating, pregnancy, unprotected and protected sex, a bunch of sex, no really a LOT of sexual themes too, I know I’m forgetting some but sorry in advance!

⇢ Copyright: please do NOT repost, translate, or modify my works in any way, shape or form, on any platform. If found doing so , it is considered as plagiarism and appropriate LEGAL action will be taken

⇢ Authors note: This is my mini series for the summer! Get your tissues, things to take your anger out on, and sit back and watch the drama unfold. Shall we begin?

‘‘ I swear I am going to have someone beat your ass Park Jimin!’’

‘‘ It’s not my fucking fault! I broke up with her but you lead her to the apartment  knowing she’ll follow!’‘

‘‘ Damn it Jimin im going to kick your ass!’‘

Your eyes pop open just in time to see Jungkook on-top of Jimin hitting him repeatedly on the face while Jimin manages to push him off of him and begin his fist fight against him. He straddles Jungkook to the floor and punches are thrown left and right. Now the sudden headache of seeing the two brothers fight has began in your head and you cannot stand hearing the groaning and yelling between them. Bringing your hand up to signal them to stop, you realize they don’t even know you’ve awakened.

 Jungkook on the other hand is not having it so he throws Jimin off of him harshly making Jimin groan. The way he grabs Jimin’s collar with venom fast strength finally gives you the courage to yell out to them.

‘‘ Stop! Damn it, you two are like literal fucking teenagers. Act your age!”

The both of them turn their heads toward you slowly. Jungkook drops his fist, which was going to connect with Jimin’s face. You take a good look at them. Freshly bruised from each-other. Great.

‘‘ You think fighting is going to solve this problem huh? Get over here now.” You say, eyebrows furrowed in anger.

Jungkook gives Jimin a death glare before rushing to your side and feeling your forehead. You slap his hand away and pull him down by his shirt only for him to recieve a harsh slap to the forehead.

‘‘ Shit!” He stumbles back and rubs his forehead. He shoots you a glare, wanting to yell at you but doesn’t.  You motion for Jimin to come to you too. He raises his eyebrows in amusement.

‘‘ I don’t think it’s necessary for you to do that..” He says, as if your death glare towards him isn’t enough to tell him you aren’t joking whatsoever.

He gets the memo when you disregard his comments before hanging his head low and bending down a little to your height. One slap against the forehead and two across the wrists.

‘‘ That’s for you fighting He was only looking out for me. The last two were for having a psychotic girlfriend who almost killed me. Look at my wrist!’‘

You hold them out to see two I.V’s, one for blood transfusion and the other a regular for nutrients on your right wrist. Both of them bandaged up which does need to be changed because of the old blood.

‘‘ I know and I’m sorry. I didn’t know she would be this upset.’‘ Jimin says, hanging his head low. Jungkook rolls his eyes at him out of annoyance.

‘‘ Whatever. I already called my lawyer for your case. Since Isabel tried to attempt murder to you, you will win this case for sure.’‘ He proudly leans against the wall hoping to atleast crack a smile from you.

You don’t smile though. The last thing you need is another scandal. If this were to make the news and blogs right now then it could be a bad thing. You’ve just started your modeling career again and right now would be the worst time to have something like that. 

Jimin leans on the wall with his hands in his pockets, still avoiding locking eyes with you which is something he usually does. Something tells you that he’s hiding something. Something that you just can’t put your finger on.

‘‘ The police will come shortly for witness statements and your statement. Then they’ll call for a court date as soon as possible.’‘ Jimin’s voice low, illuminating with a hint of sadness.

Out of curiosity you want to say something more. To ask him whats going on and why he’s acting rather like this. It’s really not like him. He’s hiding something for sure and you just cannot put your finger on it. You just agree and pull out your phone. A missed call from Ryan. You try texting her and she almost always responds immediately. This time she doesn’t. What’s really going on?

You don’t know but Ryan took it upon herself to pay Isabel a visit. Usually visitors aren’t allowed for people in holding but with a little sweet talk of hers she got to get atleast 10 minutes to talk. That’s all she needs. When it comes to you, her bestfriend, she never messes around. Hearing the news from Jungkook yesterday she almost went luncatic. Throwing things at him, calling his brother every disrespectful name in the book. Oh she hates him now for sure.

Jungkook had to stop her from going over to the hospital to beat his ass into a bloody pulp for causing you pain and getting together with that crazy girl just to break up with her. Ryan was heated. 

But now she can take this heat and serve some to Isabel right now. She walks with confidence into the room. Nothing and nobody can stop her and if they even try, she’ll chew them up and spit them out. Catching a glimpise of Isabel sitting at the table with her hands cuffed and security next to her, Ryan shoots her a devious glare.

‘‘ What brings you here? I expected my boyfr-’‘

A harsh slam from her hands hit the table as she bends a little to her seated level, ‘‘ He’ not your fucking boyfriend. You were lucky I wasn’t there to beat your fucking ass.”

The guard tenses up at the sounds and sudden movements. Ryan notices, and decides to take her seat to calm down before she’s the one sitting behind the jail bars too. 

‘‘ Ryan.. I thought we were friends?’‘ She frowns, pouting her lips while fake wiping tears away. 

Ryan scoffs,shaking her head ever so slowly with a devilish grin on her face. “ We aren’t. Don’t let me catch you un-attended without your manager or body guard.. Isabel.’’

Isabel laughs one of her evil laughs, throwing her head back then coming back up, “ Oh how cute. Is this a threat from little ol’ you? Me and Jimin were doing just fine before your bestfriend had decided to enter his life again. I’m not the only bad guy here. She should know boundaries for taken men. Ex’s aren’t supposed to be firendly and lovey dovey. Spending nights and going everywhere with each other. Especially when one’s a famous idol with another idol girlfriend. Do I make myself clear?”

“ Maybe you should take that up with your hoe of a boyfriend. He’s the one who can’t leave her alone.” She yells, inches away from Isabel’s face. The two stare at each other long and hard. Isabel is no match for Ryan though.

The guard clears his throat to break the two’s glares. The tension is thick in the air.

“ If you ever touch yn again, I’ll make sure you’re the one in the hospital this time around.”

‘‘ You’ll all see. I’ll win this court case. Trust me… there’s things you do not know.” 

Ryan rolls her eyes, strutting her way out the room with the sound of her heels clicking right behind her. Consider the message recieved. 

It’s been one week after the situation. In which in between those days you were dismissed from the hospital and have been in at Jimin’s house ever since. You didn’t want to be here. You want to be at home with your cat, Clara. Jungkook’s been going over to feed and play with her. Jimin kept pleading for you not to return home just yet because it could be a danger to you. It makes sense. You never know what Isabel has up her sleeve. 

So you’ve been sitting here doing the same old thing everyday. Eat, watch movies and netflix tv shows,  sleep, and repeat.

Jimin would come in and out of his home studio to check in on you. He still has to work on producing and singing his songs. He’d bring the food and your medicine he prepared per usual,  kiss your forehead, and go right back out to producing his highly anticipated album.

It all seems fake to you. Something is off. Something is not being told to you. You can feel it in your gut but can’t put a finger on it.

‘‘ This is so cliche.’‘ You murmur to yourself, switching the flat-screen T.V off.

And as if on cue Jimin comes inside your- well his room with a glass of water and prescribed pain killers for you. The slight smile on his face makes you want to smile but you don’t.

‘‘ Smile for ocne yn. Do you not like staying here?’‘ He says, sitting next to you on the side of the bed and places the glass in your hands.

You furrow your eyebrows at him, taking the two pills out of his palm. “ No.. but be honest with me Jimin okay?”

His face turns a quick shade of pink then pale as if you had said the wrong choice of words at the wrong time. As if he had seen a ghost at this very moment. That’s not a good sign at all.

‘‘ Are you.. hiding something from me?’‘

The atmosphere is thick and silence fills the room. You don’t say anything and he doesn’t either. Your eyes meet his and for once they don’t pull away first. 

Jimin doesn’t know how to break it to you though. It’s now or never.

‘‘ She will never leave me.”

You bite your lip hard, “ What do you mean?”

“ That she said that she’d do everything to ruin our relationship if we continue to persue one. She’d spready rumors about you to Dispatch. Make a scene whenver you’re near me. Anything she can do, she will do it.”

You don’t know how to take this all in. You knew Isabel was possesive but not this possesive. The thought of her doing things on purpose for you to make everyone hate you makes you want to cry. To just bawl your eyes out right here right now. You can’t.. you won’t do it. 

You won’t give in because thats what she wants. To make you cry. To ruin your reputation and work. Jimin came back into your life and of course you don’t know what to do or how to deal with it. But this is what you wanted right? You’ve been longing for you and him to get a second chance. It’s you. You’re the one who’s been putting things off and not letting things go with the flow. Maybe he came back to you because he realized how wrong he was for cheating on you. For leaving you behind. For not seeing things for truly how it is. 

You knew Isabel was bad luck from the beginning. Now is the time to try and take back what was originally yours. That will hurt her more than ever. 

“ She needs to have a reality check. Not everything revolves around her.”

‘‘ I agree. Putting her behind bars might give her a reality check. It should serve her right for harming people.” Jimin sighs. 

The silence is thick. You both don’t know what to say and it’s sure as hell awkward more than ever right now. Until that silence breaks. 

‘‘ I feel like you aren’t being your true self to me. If we are getting things out now.” 

His sudden comment makes you lift your head up from playing with the comforter. “ What do you mean?’’

‘‘ You.. don’t want to take actions on what you feel, say, or want to do with or about me. It’s killing me inside.”

He’s right. You do try to push your feelings aside no matter what the cause is. It’s just you trying to not set yourself up for hearbreak again. You do want him. You do want everything to do with him. Considering the things that happened in the past, it’s no doubt theres a fence guarding your heart from intruders. 

You exhale out heavily, “ Im just.. scared.’’

‘‘ Of? “

‘‘ Being hurt again.”

Dead silence again. This time he’s the one trying to come up with words to redirect your view of him. Yes, he broke your heart in the worst way possible. He wants you to see he’s changed. 

Jimin bites his lip, voice shaky when he begins talking again. ‘‘ How can I show you that i’m not the same anymore. Im not I promise you. I want you to see I have changed. I know it’s my fault. I destroyed you but let me fix it.”

It’s all come down to this. You’ve wanted this and now is the chance to get it. Now is the chance to have what was once yours. But the feeling of doubt had taken its course on you at the worst time.

‘‘ Jimin.. how do I know that for sure?’‘ You say, unintentionally fluttering your eyes at him. To you it’s to prevent from letting tears fall. 

Jimin see’s it as that specific thing you used to do when you wanted him. When you craved him and would drop hints. To be completely honest, you do crave him. You do want him. Make-up sex was something you two used to do often. It was your toxic way of saying im sorry. 

Somehow you want to put that toxic thing into action right now. As fucked up as it is, that’s how you two know you’re sorry towards each other. Actions speak louder than words. 

He closes his eyes for a quick second before clenching his jaw to contain himself. Your weak spot.

‘‘ Stop doing that. Unless you want to start something you don’t want to finish.” 

You smile just a little, hoping he’d get the memo. “ What if I do want to start and finish it..”

As if a car alarm went off, Jimin’s eyes pop back open with a suprised look. That’s the last thing he’d thought he’d be hearing from you. “ Are you sure about that? I mean we don’t have t-”

You lean in closer to where you guys are inches apart, his lips softly rubbing against yours. “ I’m all for it.”

Within seconds, Jimin’s shirt is removed off of you only revealing your blue panties which have became a little soaked with your wetness. He takes in the scent of you before his mouth connects with your thighs, slightly sucking to leave bruises on you.

‘‘ Jimin.. don’t tease me.”  You sigh, laying fully down to spread your legs even more. He hums against your skin making you catch chills up and down your spine.

‘‘ That’s my specialty baby. You know that.” He trails a kiss with each word all the way down to your core where he dips a finger inside. You tense up attempting to close your legs. He doesn’t allow it, spreading them open harshly again. 

‘’ Jimin-’‘ You barely utter before he begins to move his fingers in and out of you slowly. You let out a whine to try and make him go faster but it doesn’t work.

He comes up to your mouth and plants a wet, sloppy kiss. “ No whining. You’re gonna get what you want. Just relax baby.”

Is all he tells you before he goes back down to your core to tend to your desires.

The first lick between your legs is ever so gentle. Too gentle for you right now considering that you want release badly and Jimin knew exactly that. He opens his mouth and swirls his tongue up and down your slit. A groan leaves his mouth once he gets a taste of you which sends a vibration to your sensitive bud.

Each time his tongue laps against you your body jerked and shook but that only makes his tongue go faster. Sending you into a moaning and groaning mess as you tug on his hair.

“Mmh you even taste the same like always.” He moans with a smirk.

“Jimin please-” you cry out, locking your fingers into his hair when a finger is inserted into your dripping wet hole.

‘‘ No whining babygirl.’‘ His voice gentle as ever when he removes the finger inside of you making you pout a little. But that pout soon turned into your eyes becoming wide when he starts to take off his shirt, then grey sweatpants, then his underwear where his thick cock springs up.

Your eyes can’t leave his body. God it’s been a while. He looks pretty damn good. You wan’t to take all of his length in your mouth right now. To hear him praise you about how good your mouth feels against him. God you want it right now. 

He gives it a few strokes before walking over to you. Just before hovering over you, he gives you a passionate kiss while lifting up your legs and positioning them to his liking. Missionary.

The tip of him pokes at the entrance of you, teasing in and out. Soon enough he enters you slowly making both of you moan together.

You still wrap and fit around his member smug as ever, and he could not believe it. The feeling of familiarity of being inside you sends him into a moaning mess with each stroke. You can’t contain your moans and screams. He feels way too good. 

Jimin begins to deep-stroke you by pulling all the way out and slamming back in. You scream his name out in pleasure as your nails scratch up his toned back. Wet sounds fill the room with him picking up his pace. You take a glimpse of him only to admire his figure right now. Forehead forming sweat beads while he groans and moans biting his plump pink lips.

Your breathing becomes faster when that familiar feeling soon starts to take over. You turn your head to the side and let out a string of moans. Jimin isn’t having that though. His hand grabs your face gently and makes you make eye contact with him. Your legs start shaking as your head tilts back moans getting more faster. You finally let out one last one in sync with him, his hot sperm shoots inside of you.

Jimin pulls out, breathing heavily and collapses ontop of you. You let out a small grunt with the sudden extra body upon you, then giggle at him when he lays his head lays against your chest. This is what you wanted. He’s true. He’s sorry. 

‘’ I love you.”

That word surprises you. You weren’t prepared for it. Somehow though, you enjoy the fact that he’s said it to you. Love. Jimin’s love. Your love. 

‘’ I love you much more Jimin.’’ 

[tsuraiwrites]

weekly fic roundup

I’m an even more avid fic reader than writer, so trying to share some of the fics I’ve enjoyed this past week. mostly long fic.

ASOIAF & Solo Leveling

Breaking News: Westeros Lord Marries Stranger? What You Read Will Shock You! — tywin lannister/sung jin-woo wip

A story where Sung Jinwoo is a S rank hunter who's still busy clearing gates on Earth and taking care of his sister but has also (accidentally and unknowingly) gotten himself engaged to a certain blonde lord on another planet.

BNHA

Oracle — midoriya izuku/shinsou hitoshi wip

In which Izuku's quirk allows him to remember his past life and it becomes his driving force to become a hero and mend the mistakes of the people from his past.

Dragon Age

Someone Else — gen (so far) wip

Canon takes a brick in the face by the name of Carver Hawke.

Or: The “modern character in Thedas” trope done a liiiittle differently. Maker have mercy on us all.

Or: I can’t find a fic where the transmigrated modern character in Thedas actually massively changes canon from DAO to DAI, so I write it myself.

MDZS 江山如有待 | It Seems the Hills and Rivers Have Been Waiting — jiang cheng/ofc wip

Fan Dingxiang cultivates the swole path. Jiang Cheng doesn't know how to handle that.

pine branches swaying in time — jiang cheng/multi wip

The second time Jiang Cheng lives, he is not born as the sect heir.

The Sandman

Giving Sanctuary — dream/hob gadling wip

In 1689, Hob Gadling and Dream meet once more, after Hob has lost everything. That night, their meeting goes on longer than expected when the conversation turns to what it means to live, to lose, and to be the fathers of dead sons. Unable to bear the thought of sending a man who so echoes Dream's own grief back into the night alone, Dream breaks his own rule and invites Hob to stay with him for a time, at least until he can get back on his feet.

The story of two grief-stricken, divorced, and widowed fathers to sons they lost too young truly seeing one another and there, at their lowest point, doing their best to put themselves and each other back together.

Stranger Things

Chronomancy for Beginners — steddie wip

Bleeding out in Dustin’s arms, Eddie’s more or less made peace with the fact he’s dying. The last thing he expects is to wake up in his seventeen-year-old body on the day Will Byers goes missing. If this is real and Eddie hasn’t had a total psychotic break, maybe he can prevent a whole bunch of bad shit from happening.

Too bad no one took the time to fill Eddie in on the finer details of what the fuck’s been going on in Hawkins since November 1983.

Also, 1983 Steve Harrington kind of sucks.

The Witcher

The End Is Where We Start — duny/pavetta wip

Ciri can't accept defeat, so she gives herself a second chance in the way that only Ciri could.

Everyone else is just trying to keep up.

[shutupanddance]

To Debate, or Not To Debate

This story was developed by @sopanngon�� and I, and written by me.

Tagging @girloncorneliastreet​

- Your role is in the West Wing’s communications department, writing all the things that no one else wants to write. Memos about the National Zoo, apologies for tours gone wrong, etc. You love your job, but you have one problem: your massive crush on Josh Lyman. And the fact that he’s dating Amy Gardner.

- Josh knows who you are, especially because you’re friends with Donna, but you’re quiet and you tend to keep to yourself. So he doesn’t talk to you a lot. He thinks you’re cute, but that’s about it.

- It isn’t until one day, when Sam has gone psychotic, and Toby is too busy screaming at people to get any work done, that your writing ability comes to light.

- The President needs a speech prepared for a group of soldiers who have just come back from deployment, but his go-to speech writers are losing their minds. Leo recommends you.

- Josh shows up late to the party after some meetings on the Hill, and he arrives just as the speech is starting. He’s blown out of the water. It’s the most poetic, most beautiful thing he’s ever heard. When it’s over, everyone rushes over to Sam to offer their congratulations. He just shakes his head and points to you, who are standing off to the side of the crowds, looking like a deer caught in headlights.

- Josh waits until everyone is back in the West Wing, and people have stopped assaulting you with compliments, to find you.

- You’re hunkered down in your office with a massive hoodie on and some soft music playing, looking a little frazzled.

- He says a soft “hey”, and you look up to see your crush standing there with a smile on his face.

“That speech was amazing. You did a really good job.”

You barely manage a “thanks”.

He says “Yeah.” And then disappears.

- Now if there’s one thing Josh can do, it’s recognize talent and push people into where they’re supposed to be. He wants to find you a better job, but every time he tries to casually bring up the subject of finding you a place where you can really shine, you shut him down pretty quickly. Josh isn’t ready to give up yet, though.

- He discovers one day that not only are you a great writer, but you’re also good with the spoken word.  - Amy had just broken up with him, having gotten tired of the work-life juggling act. Josh is pretty beat-up about it.  - Everyone in the White House knows what happened, so he’s gotten lots of pitiful looks. He just wants to move on, though.

- It’s late and he’s working through some last-minute stuff when he hears a super soft knock at the doorway. You’re standing there.

“Hi!” He says, sitting up in his chair. You’ve never come to his office to talk before. You smile.

“Can I come in?”

He nods and you enter on quiet feet, settling into the chair across from him.

“Are you okay?” You ask and he lets out a rough “yeah” but he can tell you’re not buying it. So you talk it out with him in your slow, quiet manner, and by the time you leave, he feels a million times better. He’s not even sure how you did it.  - Now, Josh knows you’ve got a voice, and he wants you to use it. He wants to see if you can debate. Whenever he gets the chance, he tries to get you to argue with him. About taxes, oil, abortion, whatever. But every time he disagrees with you, you simply say “That’s an interesting way of looking at things!” And move on. For whatever reason, you’re not taking the bait. But Josh knows that if you can argue, you could become senior staff. And he wants that.

- But then, he finds it. A paper you wrote in college about how new age capitalism restricts the flow of movement on the social ladder, rather than letting people shuffle around like it’s supposed to. Your paper is so well-written, well-researched, and passionate that Josh thinks he’s found your buttons.

- The issue of tax-deductible tuition comes up and you’re eager to help out. You’re working alone in your office when Josh comes in to talk about the issue, and he casually makes a statement about how if parents can’t afford the tuition, they should be finding better jobs. You go berserk.

- Josh is immediately infatuated with you. You debate him until he’s been ground into dust. There’s no question who won this, even with him trying his best. He’s got this massive grin on his face while you’re yelling, but suddenly, your voice cracks. And tears start falling.

- He’s really not sure what to do so he grabs you a tissue and tells you to sit down. You settle into your couch and sob quietly, hands clenched over your face. Josh rubs your back. Once you’re done, you apologize, but he’s more concerned about what caused the tears.

- You explain that you really hate arguing. Like, really really hate it. And you like him so much and didn’t want to yell at him. He’s shocked.

“You can yell at me! I can take it, believe me.” He says.

“I know. But I still hate doing it.”

- Josh feels bad for trying to get you to argue with him now. He cups his hand on your shoulder and gently pulls you in, until you’re resting on his chest, and he’s reclined into the couch. Your breathing begins to even. He wraps his other arm around your waist, squeezing gently, and you snuggle into his neck.

- After this, Josh doesn’t try to push your buttons again. But he finds that, after your crying episode, if he wants an opinion from you, all he has to do is ask. You won’t argue with him, but you’ll calmly and quietly explain your point of view, and he can do with it what he wants. A strong friendship forms.

- Because Josh is so combative, you often end up going in after a meeting to clean things up with whoever he just yelled at. Donna has you help him write nicer emails, which usually includes him typing insults, you smacking his head, then the text disappearing and a new line being written in more “diplomatic” terms. Because of how close the two of you are becoming, there are times when you’ll be in the Oval Office preparing a statement, working on a bill, etc.

- The problem with that is you still hate arguing. So you tend to keep to yourself during these meetings.

- It’s one day, when your work is stacking up massively, while you’re in the Oval with a couple of the Joint Chiefs, that the President asks for your opinion on contacting the Saudi embassy about something. You give your suggestion, but Nancy McNalley doesn’t agree, and begins to argue. You want to shut up, but the President asks for you to defend your point, so soon you’re caught up in a debate about foreign relations.

- You miraculously make it to your office before breaking down. You want to curl up in a ball and sleep, but you have way too much work to do. Often helping the Senior Staff with their work is great until they all need your assistance at once.

- But Donna knocks softly on your door.

“Hey, Josh sent me to help you with your work.”

- That night, by the time you get home, you feel a lot better. And the desk clerk in your complex says that there are some flowers here for you?

A beautiful bouquet with daisies, roses, and a few white tulips. There’s a note.

I heard about your meeting in the Oval today. I hope you put Donna to good use.

Feel better.

Yours,

Josh

- People figure out pretty fast that Josh is suddenly listening to another voice besides his own. As soon as they figure out it’s you, congressmen and senators and those running for office find their way to your door. Though you’re usually not a fan of attention, you enjoy hearing what they have to say. If you agree, you bring it up with Josh. He might give some noncommittal answer, but he almost always does what you recommend, whether he realizes it or not.

- And Josh will fight and fight for you. When Sam leaves, he pushes Leo to give you more responsibility in the communications department. While Toby handles the more political events, you’re perfect for when the President needs to sound poetic.

- Leo also figures out that Josh is much calmer and quieter around you. Partially, it’s that you relax him, but also it’s because he doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. So if Josh is running a meeting into the ground, you get called in to sit in the corner and eat whatever food is on the table. It gives him a reality-check, and you’re really good at smoothing relationships over once he shuts up.

- Josh finds that eating lunch with you is a great way to get his thoughts together. You’re a really good listener, and you’re always in the food for free food.

- CJ calls it your daily “lunch date”. Donna picks that up.

“Hi, I need to see Mr. Lyman?”

“I’m sorry, he’s on his lunch date right now.”

[xoxo-teddybear]

Whatever Katsuki Wants - Bakugou Katsuki

Bakugou x f!Reader

Warnings: ANGST, violence, blood, cursing, lowkey little yandere Bakugou, smut, toxic relationship

Request: can I get Bakugou comes across a criminal on one of his bad days and he goes straight feral with an insane satisfied smile as he beats the shit out of them till they die. (Dark Ik, sorry😂) but as he beats the man, a video is taken of the scene and instead of posting it the anonymous person sent it to quirkless!FemaleReader. How would that play out?

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

“Fucking hell!”

Bakugou ran through the dark city chasing an annoying ass criminal. It wasn’t even a villain per say, more like a petty thief wanting to ruin someone’s day. His day. Now usually, the number 2 hero wouldn’t be pursuing this type of crime, but the damn prick ran into a bank, held hostages, and got away with over 5 grand.

The pro was already have a pissy day from the second he woke up. He couldn’t wake up next to his Teddy Bear because you had to visit your parents for something that started before even Katsuki had to wake up, then he burned his breakfast because a damn bird flew into the kitchen window, he was late to work and got put on night patrol, he probably wouldn’t get to see you when he got home before you knocked out because you also had a night shift, and now this.

Every second that passed caused his damn blood to boil. He was mad at....well, existence. Not his, just existence in general. For everything. He was so close to catching this damn bastard that when he finally pounced the guy, he didn’t realize there were footsteps coming his way.

Bakugou pinned the criminal to the ground in an alleyway and completely disregarded his quirk. He needed to take his anger out on something and this poor man happened to be in his grip. Bakugou threw punch after punch, kicked the man in his stomach until he coughed up blood, he stomped on the man’s head, threw him against a wall, etc. He ended it with a strong and fiery blast at the unconscious body. Finally, after 2 minutes of silence, Bakugou began to sinisterly laugh. A psychotic laugh with a crazed look in his eye. He was hunched over with his arms loose as he walked towards the dead man, picking him up by his skull.

“Sorry buddy, you caught me on a bad day,” he laughed out and whispered into the lifeless body’s ear. He threw the body into a pile of trash cans before walking out of the alleyway. When he turned the corner, he took notice of a trembling civilian, holding a camera at him. “The hell?! THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT DAMN CAMERA?!”

Bakugou barked at the random person with devil eyes before sending a blast to the phone. The person ran away screaming, pissed at the hero for doing that. To be petty, the “extra” (as Bakugou would say) wanted this video to be exposed. Not to the media, this person wasn’t cruel enough to destroy someone else’s career, but he wanted to send it to someone to have the hero learn a lesson.

Now it was no secret that the pro was in a relationship. In an article, it was revealed that the two of you had been together for the past 4 years. With that in mind, the damn hacker found Dynamight’s longtime girlfriend’s number and sent the video her way.

—

At Bakugou’s nice home, his perfect little oblivious girlfriend hummed a tune to herself as she made some spicy curry for her precious Suki. Now it’s not that Y/N was dumb. She was actually very intelligent. But when it came to Katsuki, she was just a cute little “housewife” that loved him.

Flashback

When Bakugou first met you in the grocery market, he couldn’t help but notice your tiny but voluptuous figure, you were struggling to reach a box of cereal until Katsuki came along and helped.

“Here you go, Short Stack. Maybe next time you should ask your mommy to help you reach the high shelves.” He teased with a wink to the nickname.

You looked at the handsome blonde with a blush at first sight but when he teased you, your blush grew more ferocious with a pout and pointed brows. “I don’t need my mom to help me in the grocery store. I’m 22 for God’s sake!” You said, reaching for the box that he now held over his head.

“Hm, woulda said 17.” He teased again. You ignored his jokes and jumped to reach the box and take it out of his hands. You failed multiple times and he still stood tall with a smirk as he looked down at you.

‘Now she’s fucking cute’ he thought to himself. His eyes traveled down to your busty hips and tiny waist, then taking notice of the way your chest bounced around when you jumped and reached for the cereal. ‘Pretty damn sexy too.’

“C’mon little bear. You can do it.” He said with a shit eating grin. You pouted some more and stomped your foot before coming to a realization and began smirking. You dropped to the floor and swooped your legs to kick at his ankles and made him drop to the floor. As he fell, he let go of the box and you caught it midway before turning your back to him. Usually, Bakugou would be a little pissed, but his anger died down at the sight of your juicy ass.

“Yes!” You cheered.

“Woah..” Bakugou said in a trance. You turned to him with a confused look before he quickly hid it with a scowl. You giggled at his place on the floor and stuck out your hand to help him up.

“Sorry, but maybe you should’ve just given me my cereal. Anyway, thanks for the ‘help’ I guess..uh..” you asked, hinting for his name.

“Bakugou.” He answered and you nodded and gave a soft smile before speaking.

“Bakugou.” You said, finishing your previous sentence. “Well, I’ll be off now,”

You began to walk away but felt Bakugou tug on your arm. You looked back at him with another confused look but was only met with a cute smirk.

“Hey, I helped you with that cereal, the least you could do is give me the pretty girl’s name.” He said. You blushed a bit more before giving him a dumb look.

“Who? Me?” You teased.

“Nooo, the old hag at the cash register,” he joked. You both laughed at his comment as you settled with his hold on you, not minding the contact at all.

“Y/N L/N.” You said.

“Alright Y/N L/N, was nice meeting you.” He said with his hands in his pockets while holding a smile. A real smile and not a smirk.

“I know.” You said with a cocky smile that he could only chuckle at. “Was nice meeting you too Bakugou. I’ll see you around,” you said walking away with a waving hand.

As you walked, Bakugou couldn’t help but admire your curvy body and drool at the sight. He didn’t know what it was but something was pulling him to you. He wanted you. He needed you. That little interaction was not enough. It’s not even that he wanted to fuck. Sure you had a banging body, but your playful self caught his interest. He wanted your mind, body, and soul. He wanted to make you his.

Through the help of technology and his access to police files and hero reports, he was able to find your name, address, where you worked, and all that. He worked hard to “coincidentally” run into you constantly, up until the point where you two became quite acquainted. You eventually asked him to hang out (as friends) and that’s where the relationship grew. A few months had passed before Bakugou successfully asked you on a date, and that’s when you both found love within each other. Or more so, you found love in him. He loved you at first sight and he knew it for a fact.

After a year of dating, Bakugou asked you to move in with him and you of course said yes. Once settled in, he worked even harder to constantly fuck you stupid, break you down but build you up at the same time. He made it clear he was in charge and you were his little toy. A toy he loved with his entire being, but still a toy.

You became his dumb little girl. You had a job but Katsuki encouraged you to not work so much. “I don’t want you to raise a finger pretty girl. Just let Daddy take care of you,” he would say as he bounced you on his cock.

You had a little dance hobby that Katsuki also encouraged you to take a break from. “You don’t need to put on a show for anybody else but me, Princess. Daddy’ll give you all the attention you want.” He’d say as he kissed your cheek and finger you in front of a mirror.

You used to have friends before Bakugou found out they were trying to warn you of his abrasive behavior. Growing pissed at that, he convinced you they were against you and were no good for you.

“Those little friends of yours could never make you feel as good as I do, baby. They’re no good for you. They just want us to be apart. They’re jealous. They want you to leave me, but you don’t want that, right princess?”

“N-No daddy!”

“That’s right princess. You definitely don’t wanna leave me. Because no would could take care of you like I do, right? No one could. Nobody but me,” he would say as he pounded into you and whispered in your ear.

Eventually, Katsuki became your whole life. You would work one day a week so that you had more time for Katsuki. You would wake up next to him and cuddle with him until he had to leave for work. You would clean the house and cook for him, and you would wait for him to come home during the late hours of the night so you could smother him with love. Often times, you guys would fuck. Matter of fact, the day you first moved in, you Christened every place and piece of furniture in his house. It was the same routine that you learned to love. Wake up, cuddle, clean, cook, love, fuck.

Being Katsuki’s precious dumb baby girl, he couldn’t let his baby bear see all the damage he does as a hero. Oh no, that would scare you way too much. Your precious little self wouldn’t be able to handle it. He would tell you he was a pro hero, the number 2 hero, saving lives, and he was satisfied every time he saw the sparkle in your eyes as you looked at your hero boyfriend with a proud look. He never told you about the dark side of hero work though. The bloodshed, the kills, the deaths. Horrid things your sweet baby mind wouldn’t be able to take. He would keep his princess oblivious to the terrible things he has to do as a hero and you being his dumb little bear listened when he said you wouldn’t be able to find any videos of him. Why bother to check if he was right? Your Katsuki would never lie to you. He would never do wrong by you. All and all, Katsuki can’t risk her getting scared and leaving.

That was until....

—

Ding!

You were busy finishing up dinner when your phone went off. You looked down to the screen to see a random number had sent you a video. From the preview of the video on the banner, you took notice of that easily recognizable tuff of spiky blonde hair. You grew excited at the small sight of your boyfriend and swooned before you watched the video.

After you pressed play, your smile remained as you watched your boyfriend. However, as the video went on, your smile slowly dropped and became replaced with an open mouth. Your eyes became filled with fear as you watched your “sweet” boyfriend ruthlessly murder a man in an alleyway. You listened to his crazy laugh and felt your heart skip a few beats. Your mouth became dry and your palms grew sweaty as the video continued to install fear in you. Finally, your boyfriend threw the dead body into a pile of trash cans before you saw him look to the camera with those eyes. Those ruby gems that you used to love turned into blood drops as he gave the camera a scary glare. He barked at the man behind the camera before aiming a blast his way. The blast came at the camera and made you jump as it felt like the attack was going to hit you. You flinched and dropped your phone as the video finished and your breath grew heavy as you began to sweat and look around.

You immediately ran to your shared bedroom and pulled out your laptop. Katsuki always said you would never find anything about Dynamight online, but all you had to do was type in his name to find multiple videos of his deathly battles. You watched countless recordings of him mercilessly killing people left and right with his quirk and bare hands. Your body began to shake as your pupils dilated with fear. After a terribly gruesome fight video, you threw your device aside in fear and ran into the living room. You settled the slightest bit before growing nervous once more. All around the house were pictures of you and Katsuki. He was everywhere in the house. And those dangerously red eyes followed you everywhere. You began to hyperventilate until the sound of jingling keys invaded your ears.

You looked at the door in fear and after a few seconds, the main man walked in. Katsuki Bakugou. He seemed exhausted but once he took sight of you, he visibly became at ease.

—

Bakugou walked into the door, pissed off and tired as fuck. Luckily, that all changed when he noticed his precious Teddy Bear in the living room. He assumed you came to greet him again like you always did and he smiled at that.

“K-Katsuki! Hi..” you nervously said but Bakugou was too intoxicated with you to even notice. He walked to you with a smile and wrapped his arms around your waist before peppering your face in sweet kisses. You flinched due to his touch but Bakugou just assumed it was because of his stronger caramel scent. He did use his quirk a lot today after all.

“Hi baby,” he said. He didn’t stop his kisses as he spoke in between them. “Had such a bad day this mornin’.....was so upset......missed you a lot baby...did you miss me?”

“Mm..y-yes.” You once again said in fear. You definitely missed him throughout the day, but now with this new information, you wanted nothing more than to get away from him. Bakugou moved his kisses to your lips and placed a long, loving one on you. He had his eyes shut and so did you, but his were shut in content and yours were scrunched in fear. The entire time, you could feel your rapid heart rate pulse all throughout your body.

Bakugou started a heavy make out session with you as his hands traveled to the swell of your ass and gave it a grip and smack. He spoke to you throughout the kiss and kept his lips hovering when he spoke before diving right back into it. “Not my best day today......but you can make it better, right baby.....you wanna help Daddy feel better?”

“Mm!” You didn’t say yes but you couldn’t say no either. You didn’t know how to. Not when it came to Katsuki. At the cute little sound, Bakugou picked you up and placed you down on the couch, too eager to dive into you right away.

He placed you on the wide couch and began grabbing at your body. Your tiny waist, your curvy hips, your pretty titties. That was when he finally felt you tense up. A few nervous thoughts infiltrated his mind. Did you not want this? You never said no to him though. What was going on? He pushed those thoughts away as he continued. Maybe you were just extra sensitive today. Things were starting to change when he moved his hand down into your panties and you tried to squirm away from him.

“Baby?” He asked you as he separated from your lips and gave you a confused puppy look. He finally took notice of your nervousness and looked at you with worry. “You okay, princess?”

“Umm, yeah! I’m-..I’m okay it’s just, you don’t wanna take a shower before we do anything?” You asked as an excuse. Bakugou chuckled and a few of his nerves began to settle.

“C’mon princess, I know I just got off of work but it’s always just smoke and caramel with me. Besides you love it, I know you do.” He said and smirked as he began to lick at your neck. You nervously laugh and pushed on his chest to back him up.

“Aha, yeah, but don’t you wanna be a little more comfortable?” You asked again.

“I’m already comfortable right here. If anything, I’d be really comfortable if we were both bare already.” He said against your neck again. You pushed him off again and placed a soft hand on his cheek while giving him the sweetest smile as you spoke.

“Please love, for me?” You asked. You watched as Bakugou gave an exasperated sigh with a smile and roll of his eyes before leaning down and giving you a sweet peck.

“For you.” He said before pecking your cheek. “Everything for you, baby.” He said and finally got up to go wash up.

Once he was out of sight you released a relieved sigh. With him gone, you felt yourself began to shake again as you crowded into a corner on the couch and held yourself. You covered your mouth as you began to silently cry and sob. That-..that killer was so close to you. He was pressed against you. His once loving and comforting presence now became dangerous and scary. You didn’t know if you could take it.

—

As Katsuki walked up the stairs to the master bedroom, he couldn’t help but feel the nerves begin to bubble back up again. Why were you acting so...disobedient? It kind of irritated the blonde but he settled nonetheless. Maybe you were just having an off day. Bakugou walked right into the room and went straight for the shower after tossing his phone on the bed. The sooner he washed up, the sooner he could get to ravish you. He was quickly in and out of the shower and once he went back into the room, he threw on a pair of Gray sweats. Before leaving, Bakugou went to grab his phone but noticed your laptop opened. He looked to the screen in curiosity and felt his heart drop to his stomach once he saw what he did.

‘PRO-HERO DYNAMIGHT’S MOST LETHAL ATTACKS’ was the video you were watching. Bakugou took notice of the setting and remembered that battle. The battle where he grabbed a villain by their neck and blasted off into the sky before using an explosion to hurl them down to the ground again, killing them in the end.

Why the hell were you watching this? How the hell did you find this?! Why did you even think of looking for this video?! Bakugou felt his heart rate increase as his breath became huffs of frustration. His eyes grew fierce as he grabbed the laptop and ran downstairs. Once he walked in, he saw you cornered in the couch, hugging your knees with your head down. “Y/N!”

You immediately looked up when your boyfriend called your name. He finally saw your teary eyes and feared face when you looked to him. Then it finally clicked. This is why you were acting so off. You found him. You found the other side of him. The Katsuki you knew was sweet, teasing, loving, and a romantic. The Katsuki he hid from you was ruthless, violent, feral, and borderline insane. And you were acting off because you finally found out.

“Mind telling me what the fuck this is?!” He shouted. Now this wouldn’t be the first time Katsuki’s yelled at you. While he was in the process of breaking you down, he had to yell to let you know who was in charge. It’s not like he was heartless though, he hated it every time you forced his hand and made him yell at you. He felt so guilty and made sure to cater to your every need after he would freak out on you. Thankfully, you were a quick learner and it’s been years since you’ve gotten reprimanded by him.

You stood to your feet to try and defend yourself and get a grip. “K-Katsuki! I-..I swear it’s nothing! I wasn’t doing anything!”

“You’re gonna fucking lie to me now, Y/N?! Why the hell did you go and look for this video?” He fiercely asked. You remained silent as you were terrified and just trembled at you chewed at your lip. “ANSWER ME!”

“I-...Someone-..Somebody sent me a video...of you...and what you did tonight.” You hesitantly said. Bakugou slammed to your laptop shut and threw it to a wall, destroying it in the process.

“Show me the video.” He demanded. You were still shaking as you looked to him in fear and shock at what he just did. “NOW!”

You scrambled to get your phone and give it to Katsuki. He watched the video with a numb expression but his grip on the phone gave away all his emotions of anger and fury. Once the video was done, he looked at you with an insane smirk. You stared at him in fear as you watched his every move and right then and there he crushed your phone in his hand.

“K-Katsuki!” You shouted as you looked to your now destroyed devices. He dusted off his hands and walked to you. You tensed up at his approach and when he raised a hand to cup your cheek gently, he felt the way you shook in extreme terror.

“It’s okay, baby. You can tell me whatever you’re thinking right now. I won’t get mad.” He softly said with a smile. He was so close to you now. His hand was caressing your face oh so sweetly that it made you believe him the slightest bit. You don’t know if it was love or fear that caused you to tell him but you did.

“I-..I’m..I’m scared of you Katsuki.” You said with tears in your eyes. Katsuki just continued to softly stroke your face with his gentle smile as he nodded his head and encouraged you to go on. “You didn’t tell me..about anything of that. You told me you saved people..but you were..killing them.”

“It’s how I have to save people baby. People who become too dangerous need to be put down. It’s my job baby, you understand, don’t you?” He asked with his gentle tone. You shook your head as he still held it softly.

“No..I- I don’t.” You looked at Katsuki with hurt eyes and you took a small breath before you boldy said the next words. “I-..I think we should take a break.”

At that, Katsuki tensed up again. His eyes went wide for a second and his smile dropped before he shook his head and the kind eyes and warm smile returned. He stared at you for what felt like forever before his sweet face turned into a scary look and his hand quickly wrapped around your neck to put you into a small choke hold. Bakugou flipped you onto the couch and pinned you there. You began to scream and squirm but he covered your mouth and held you down with his legs to keep you steady.

“Careful Teddy Bear,” he said with a maniacal look, “shout and scream too much and you might just lose your breath,” he said and tightened his hold the slightest bit. “And we wouldn’t want that now, would we?”

You began to silently sob as his hand covered your mouth and you stopped moving under his hold. You nodded your head as tears began to spill down your face. Katsuki pouted at you before leaning down to lick away a tear. “Awe, don’t cry baby. There’s nothing to be scared off.”

At his words, your eyes grew angry and you bit his hand to remove it. He shouted at the bite and removed his hand as he looked down at you in anger. “You! That’s what I’m scared of Katsuki!” You said with anger and sadness.

Bakugou didn’t take too kindly to that and clenched his fist before he smacked your face. Your head turned to the side at the hard slap as you gasped at the contact. Bakugou grabbed your face with his large hand and made you face him.

“Dirty fucking bitch. You fucking love getting smacked by me don’t you?” He said with a crazed look. “Listen to me very carefully Y/N. I’ve loved you since I first laid my fucking eyes on you. So you’re not allowed to leave me. Understand?” He asked. You began to squirm again and he smacked you again to get you to stop. “ENOUGH OF THAT! You’re not leaving me Y/N. If you run, I’ll find you again the same way I did in the beginning. If you hit me, I’ll have to punish you. You remember all your punishments, don’t you? So stop fighting it. You love me and I love you. We’re not splitting up.”

You narrowed your eyes at Bakugou before spitting on his face. His eyes grew feral as his hold returned to your neck to give it a squeeze. You could still breath..but barely. “Answer me this baby. Answer wrong though and I’ll do what has to be done. Do you want to leave me?”

You looked at his eyes to find any hints of danger. Sadly, everything about this whole situation screamed danger. You still had love for Katsuki, you knew you did, but this was a whole different level. You didn’t know who this was. “.....Yes.”

“Wrong answer.”

With that, Bakugou began to rip your clothes off along with his own. You watched in fear as he did everything. The entire time, he had this excited grin on his face with insane eyes.

“K-Katsuki! What are yo-“ before you could finish, Bakugou had taken your panties and used them as a gag for you. He shoved them in your mouth and you made muffled sounds. You were both now completely bare on the couch, just like he wanted when he first came home.

“Relax baby,” he said before kissing your cheek softly as he pulled you to him. “I’m gonna make you feel so good..I’m gonna do something so nice that you’ll never want to leave.”

You shook your head with tears in your eyes. You tried push him away but he pulled your hands down. “Stop that. I’m not a heartless monster baby. I promise you’ll enjoy it.”

He grabbed both your hands and pinned them above your head in the couch. Both your tiny hands were able to be held by his one giant palm as his other hand traveled to your lower region and began rubbing soft circles on your clit. You arched your back at the pleasant feeling. As much as you didn’t want this, as much as you wanted to run away and leave, your body couldn’t deny the pleasure he gave you. He knew you inside and out. He was able to break you from a single touch.

“Feel good?” He asked with a smirk. You shook your head in disagreement. His smirk fell into a determined frown. He knew you didn’t want this now but he would make sure you would soon enough. His movements picked up speed and your legs began to shake. Katsuki finally shoved two fingers in, causing you to shriek with the muffled sound.

His pumps gave no hesitation with their speed as they went in hard and fast. You were practically screaming behind the panties once he gave in another 2 fingers. His thumb played with your clit as he continued to whisper dirty things into your ear.

“My little slut really thought she could leave me? Huh? Cant you hear the sounds your pretty pussy is making. Your mouth may say you don’t want me but your mind and body says otherwise.” With that he slipped in his thumb and you’ve never felt so full. You had his entire fist pumping in and out of you as your felt your legs growing weak. “Fuck baby, look at you. Taking my fist so well. Feel good? Feel full? Hm?”

This time, you moaned in agreement. You couldn’t help it. This was going to be your last time with Katsuki, might as well make it last. However, that was never Bakugou’s plan, no. He loves you too much to let you go. You aren’t leaving him and he’s making sure of it.

As he continued, he felt you tighten around his fist. He smiled once again and sped up his movements. “C’mon baby, let me hear you.” He leaned down and pulled the panties out of your mouth with his teeth. He tossed them aside and allowed you to voice your thoughts.

“F-Fuck Katsuki! M-More! Please!” You begged. He only looked down at you with wide eyes and a grin.

“More? What more could I give you baby?” He said, leaving down to you. “Tell me what you want Y/N.”

“I-...I-“

“You- you- you what teddy bear? Tell me. Do you want..me to stop?” He teased.

“N-No!” You cried out.

“Do you want me to slow down?” He asked.

“No!”

“Then? What do you want, baby?” He asked.

“Mm! I- I want you to fuck me Katsuki! Please! Fuck me with your cock!” You cried out and Bakugou’s fist came to a stop.

“Good girl.” He then pulled out his fist and quickly replaced it with his dick. You both cried out in euphoria. He wasted no time in ramming into you, using a quick speed. He held onto your hips as you velvet walls swallowed him in. “S-Shit baby! Fuck, after all that you’re still so- fuck! So fucking tight.”

His fingertips had a grip on your hips that was sure to leave bruises. The way he was pounding into you caused your breast to bounce and dance right in front of him. Not that it wasn’t anything Katsuki hasn’t seen before, but it’s the fact that he loves the scene so much. He licked his lips at the sight of your voluptuous mounds before taking one into his mouth. The feeling of his teeth sinking in had you gasping and your hands found way into his hair, pulling him in closer.

“K-Katsuki!” You cried out. He smirked at the sound and released you from his mouth.

“You don’t even know how good you look. How good you will look when I knock you up and fill you with my kids.” He said against your bare skin. This made your eyes pop as you looked at him in fear.

“W-what?! No! Katsuki! Please, I don’t want thi-“

“Shut the fuck up!” He screamed over you. He placed his hand around your neck as his cock completely took over you. “Yes you do! Don’t you remember baby? You always talked about starting a family with me. Now you can have it!”

“K-Katsuki..please! Please stop, this is rape!” You urgently whimpered. Bakugou merely ignored your cry as he continued his motions.

“I said, SHUT THE FUCK UP! It’s not rape if you enjoy it baby.” He said in response. He continued to touch you in the dirtiest of ways, bringing quiet moans out of you no matter how hard you tried to fight it.

“No! I don’t want it anymore! I don’t want you Katsuki!” You cried. Tears now flowed down your face in fear. You’ve always wanted a family with him. But that was before you knew how he truly was. Your words only angered Katsuki and so he punished you with a harsh smack to the face. Your head turned to the side as you gasped at the stinging feeling that almost felt like pleasure in a way.

“I’m gonna give you brat, and you’re gonna stay. You’re gonna stay with me and we’re gonna be a happy family! Because I love you and I know you love me.” He said. Your legs were growing weak as his relentless thrusts never stopped.

“P-Please. Please, I’ll stay. But I don’t want this. Not now.” You whimpered. At your soft voice, Bakugou slowed down the pace but his hard thrusts continued.

“Sorry baby, but I want this. I’ve spoiled you for too long. I give you everything under the sun and you reward me by trying to leave. Especially over such a small instance? I don’t think so. The least you could do for me is give me the family I want with you. Don’t you agree?” He sweetly said with malice intent.

You only continued your whimpers as you allowed him to do as he pleased. You weren’t getting out of this. Katsuki gets whatever Katsuki wants. If he wanted to fuck his child into you, he was going to do so, one way or another. Katsuki allowed his moans to fill the room as the once sweet sound of skin slapping grew louder and louder, coming faster and faster. Eventually, you reached your release and even squirted all over Katsuki’s chest. He very much enjoyed that and it brought him closer to his climax. He kept to his word and filled you up to the brim. You both threw your head backs and cried out in ecstasy.

Once he was done, Katsuki remained inside of you as he laid on top of you. He peppered your face in kisses as you continued to make soft sounds. You both remained on the couch for some time before he pulled out and walked to the kitchen to get a rag and clean you and himself up. Once done, he picked you up and brought you to the bedroom where he placed you down under the sheets and joined you. He cuddled with you in bed feeling happy and joyous while your head was stuck in thought.

‘If his plan worked, I’ll be a mother soon. There’ll be a baby growing inside of me.’ You silently thought. Bakugou snapped you out of your thoughts with a kiss on your lips before he began speaking.

“..I know what you saw on the footage was scary, but that’s not the only part of me. I’ve shown you every other me. The me that loves you and wants to be with you forever, Y/N.” He said and picked up your hand to give your knuckles a kiss.

“....I understand that your job isn’t the purest. I understand that sometimes, a life will be lost. But the video that was sent to me, showed you killing a petty robber. You took it too far.” You argued quietly.

“Tch. Whatever. He deserved it anyway-“

“And it’s not only that, but you’re the reason why I have no friends, no job, no money, no family, no nothing. In the beginning, it was amazing because I thought I knew you. But now, I’m just scared of you Katsuki and I have no one else to go to.” You began to get choked up. This was the man you loved but you felt like you didn’t know him anymore. Right now, in your eyes, he was a killer. A scary monster.

“If you left me, who would you go to baby? You’re absolutely right. You have no friends. No job. No home. You have nobody but me. You need me. Say it.” He demanded. You remained quiet to rebel against his wishes until he took hold of your face and squeezed it tight. To stop the pain, you forced the words out.

“I-...I need you!” With that, he released his hold on you and his hand rested on your cheek. He stared into your eyes and you looked at him with the sad and confused look you had on ever since he came home.

“I love you Y/N. Do you still love me?” He asked.

“......I do.” You said. A smile grew on his face.

“Then we can make this work,” he said and pulled you into his chest, holding you tight. You whimpered into his chest but nonetheless held onto him tight as well. You did love him. You knew you did. But you didn’t love who he truly was. Or at least, what part of him was. A killer. A murderer.

He was right though. You had nowhere else to go. Katsuki really was your everything. And so, you were going to allow this relationship to go on. His child will come from you and you will start a family with him. Whether you want it to happen or not. As long as he wants it, it’ll happen.

Whatever Katsuki wants.

A/N: THE ENDING IS SO RUSHED AND HORRIBLE! IM SORRY!

Tag list: @sxcker4you @aomi04

[cipheress-to-k-pop]

Pls could you do a Bad Ben x reader?

Why I Hate Bellwood 

Pairing: (Bad) Ben Tennyson x Reader

Warnings: Sexual assault and harassment themes

Word Count: 2.1k

Summary: You don’t think there’s anything redeemable or good about Ben Tennyson until he saves you from a dangerous situation.

You hated living in Bellwood. It was the worst place to be and you couldn’t even imagine how it was a functioning city. It was a town rampant with criminals and villains. In a place where the crime rate not only sky-rocketed each week but also where no one gave any damn to change it.

They even had their own super-powered thief. Of course.

Coincidentally, the town you hated the most also happened to be the place where you were transferred to. Maybe it was because your supervisor wanted to send the most capable and competent student there. Or maybe it was because you ran your mouth and chewed out her daughter (who had a severe case of princess syndrome).

You and your big mouth.

You had a small studio apartment that could barely fit a bed and that made you feel claustrophobic. Even though you wanted a bigger place, this was the only apartment you could find that was in your price range and in the safer parts of town. Relatively speaking.

Even though you made a conscious effort to stay out of trouble, it seemed to present itself to you on a silver platter. Or more accurately, a stolen silver platter. The trouble you were talking about was Ben Tennyson himself, the friendly neighbourhood criminal.

It was absurd to think that a boy your age could have his entire town at his mercy because of a fancy watch but it was true. He was terrifying, and more importantly, unstoppable. So, you tried your hardest to stay out of his sight, and out of his way.

Unfortunately, that seemed like it wouldn’t happen either. Not even a week after you had moved, you had found out that the crazy crime lord that you had been trying to avoid was living in the apartment next to yours. And not only were you neighbours, but you could see right into his room through the window.

Not like you tried. You had been too afraid to even open the window.

How could this be the safest place in town if this maniac was living right across from you?

Although when you asked the other women in the building, they had told you that was the whole point. Ben Tennyson was a ruthless maniac and known criminal. That’s why no sane person would come into a mile of his home.

All they had to do was avoid him like the plague and so would the other criminals.

And in the psychotic, irrational fashion that was accustomed to Bellwood, that actually made sense. And knowing that Ben was living right across from you was a sign of extreme comfort but also fear.

Would he kill you if you snored too loudly in the night? Or if you kept the lights on in the night and disturbed him?

The fear you had made you want to fall beneath his radar and go completely unnoticed by him. You would stay out of his sight and completely out of his life until you completed your work and could return home.

That had been the plan.

Until one day you had been returning from your classes a little later than usual. It was already dark out and there were fewer cars out on the roads. Walking through the streets alone made an eery feeling settle in your veins and you pumped your legs faster, breaking out into a run.

Just as the busy intersection came into your sights, somebody stepped in front of you and you stopped instinctively. Even though you shouldn’t have. It was a broad man, who had tattoos covering his arms up until his neck. He grinned widely at you, but it was a sick smile that made you gulp and back away.

You didn’t take your eyes off him, scared that he was going to make a sudden move. But just as you began backing away, you collided into someone and when you turned around, ice settled in your veins to see another man smirking at you.

You were immediately frozen in fear, breaths shortening in your chest when his hands came towards you. You wanted to run away from there. But they seemed to realize what your plan was.

They grabbed you, hands digging painfully into your arms and you yelped, resisting in their grip.

“Oh, now sweetheart, don’t fight, it’s not gonna be fun for you if you do.”

Tears started burning your eyes and panic burned through your chest, “Let—Let me go.”

They didn’t reply, only chuckling in response but their grip got tighter when you started thrashing. Your mind went blank, reducing to instincts and you began screaming as tears escaped your eyes.

The men’s faces hardened and they started dragging you with them, not fazed by your rapid kicking and squeezing your throat when you started screaming and crying again.

You had never been so scared in your entire life. They got closer to a dark alley and your breaths shortened, crying out and begging against the hand slapped over your mouth but they didn’t hear or they didn’t care.

Just as they pulled you into the shadows of the alley, there was a bright flash of light from its depths. Your eyes burned from the brightness but you still didn’t close them, scared that something would happen in the second you did.

Because you kept them peeled open, you were able to make out the silhouette of some creature before the light faded. It moved too quickly for your eyes to process, especially in your state of fear, but in a second, the pressure of the men pressed to your front and back had disappeared.

The figures were knocked over like small boys and you heard the sounds of their grunts. Even though you felt immense relief, you were still frozen. You didn’t even bother moving from your place when the creature came to stand in front of you.

“Who the fuck dares to mess with us.” One of them growled, standing up. You couldn’t see anything in the dark and you just chose to grip tightly onto the straps on your back, clenching your jaw tightly.

The bright light came back and you glanced up to see the figure get reduced to a boy. He held up his watch, it glowing in the night and you finally saw his face. He was glaring darkly at the men, lips turned in a frightening scowl.

“Who the fuck dares to mess with a defenceless woman.” He spat and they froze, realizing who they were talking to.

“Holy shit, it’s Ben Tennyson.”

He glared at them, seeing the way they were turned, probably about to make a break for it, “If you even think of running, I will hunt you down like the dogs you are.”

He then turned to you, holding up the watch to your face. You finally got a good look at his face, dark hair and deep green eyes. His face was innocent and charming, even though you knew he was rougher around the edges. Even then, he looked safe, like he’d protect you.

You, on the other hand, looked like a mess. Eyes red and tears streaming down your cheeks, your clothes were dishevelled and your hair because of the way they yanked it.

Ben’s jaw tightened, noting the way you were still sobbing quietly into your hand but when his eyes handed on the bruises around your neck, you saw the unadulterated rage that boiled over on his face.

He turned into another alien, pinning the two men against the wall by their necks. They choked, gasping for the breath that got knocked out of them but Ben didn’t care, his grip only got tighter when they started begging.

“You didn’t hear her when she was crying? You didn’t stop when she was in pain? Then why the fuck should I?” He spat and you felt mixed emotions. For a second, you were relieved and flattered he was sticking up for you. And then you were reminded of the way these men were overpowering you mere minutes before.

Even though you didn’t have a reason to be afraid now, the terror still returned and your knees buckled, sending you to the ground as a choked sob left your lips.

Ben glanced back at you, eyes softening just for a second before he turned back to the monsters that were left at his mercy. They cowered at his gaze and tried mangling out some pleas through the grip he had on their throats but he felt disgusted to even be touching them.

“If you even touch another woman like that in my town, I will rip your fingers off and feed them to you. The only reason I’m letting you go is so that you can spread the word to other lowlifes like you.” He spoke lowly, loosening his grip and they fell to the floor, nodding and apologizing.

They tried to come closer to you, to apologize but you cowered, backing away with a whimper and Ben growled at them before pointing at you, “Her especially. If I ever see you within 50 feet of her, I won’t be so kind.”

They nodded wordlessly before running away, tails tucked between their legs and only when the sound of their footsteps completely disappeared were you finally able to breath.

Ben gently knelt in front of you. He made no move to touch you, only watching as you lifted your head to meet his eyes and your chest cleared. You felt unbelievable relief looking at him.

Before you could control yourself, you started sobbing uncontrollably, launching yourself into his arms and throwing yours around his neck. He stiffened for a minute before relaxing, gently holding your body against his, knowing that you just needed to be comforted.

Eventually, your cries lulled down and you were left feeling exhausted, but he still didn’t let go.

“I thought you were supposed to be the bad guy?” You asked breathlessly and he smirked at you.

“I am, but I have some class. Touching someone against their consent is beneath me.” He said it with so much disgust in his voice that you believed him. You always thought he was just like them, a lowlife and mangy criminal, but looking at him now, he was much more honourable than you realized.

“Come on, I wanna get back home.”

Even though he was holding out his hand for you to take, you still couldn’t move from your place on the floor, staring up at him with wide eyes. You thought he was supposed to be a criminal. Why was he being so good to you?

“Ask me something.” He said suddenly and you flinched. Ben looked down at you and pursed his lips. He knew you needed to get your mind off whatever just happened.

“What?”

“I’m giving you permission to ask me something. Anything. You’re getting a really rare chance here.”

Of course, a million and one questions were going through your head. Why did he help you? Was he really a bad guy? Was he a misunderstood person? Like Robin Hood?

Even with so many thoughts rushing through your head, when you opened your mouth, the only thing that slipped out was, “Is it true you walk around in your apartment without your shirt?”

You had heard about it from the girl who lived in the apartment before you and had been too scared to look out the window to prove her right or wrong. You don’t know why you were so curious about it, just because you wondered whether he was comfortable enough to roam around without his shirt on or whether he really didn’t care.

Ben smirked at you, “Why? Interested in the view?”

Your face went red, “No, I just heard it from someone.”

“My hand is getting tired.”

You looked at his hand again, still held out for you to take. Gingerly, you slipped your palm into his and he held onto your hand firmly, pulling you to your feet. You were still tense, looking around suspiciously and huddling a little closer to him.

“Let’s go, no one’s gonna be stupid enough to come near you while I’m here.”

“I can trust you right?”

He sent you a smirk that made you uneasy and flustered at the same time, “At your own risk.”

Looking down at your intertwined hands, you figured you might just take it.

Forever Taglist:

@simonsbluee

[petite-ely]

Afraid // JJ Maybank

five - but what if?

Pairing: JJ Maybank x fem routledge! reader

Warnings: bad language (don’t swear kids), mention of drowning, mention of death, nightmares, mention of guns, mention of fight, did I miss something.

Description: after his reckless actions at the party, JJ is unable to sleep but he isn’t the only one still awake.

A/n : I don’t want to make this longer than it already is, I think I’ve talked enough lol. If for some reason you want to know why I’ve been gone for so long I’ve written a post regarding it. Sorry again for not posting in so long. If you want to chat, feel free to reach out. I’m friendly. :) please kindly tell me if I’ve made some mistakes, I’ve reread this like a hundred times but its possible some mistakes slipped.

Previously next

Afraid masterlist

Gif by @cobrazkai

Song recommendation

JJ Maybank was 14 years old when he first realized that he had feelings for one of his best friends. The thing is he didn’t know what the hell those feelings were. He had always thought that y/n was really pretty and he considered her to be one of her closest friends and that was it. Friends- that’s what they were.

But after years of friendship and wild adventures and basically hanging out 24/7, something felt different. And boy, did that scare him.

JJ was not the kind of person to be really in touch with his emotions. Being abandoned by his own mother and living with an abusive alcoholic father didn’t really help either. If anything, his past traumas only made him more disconnected from his emotions and feelings.

He might’ve been hot headed and impulsive but that didn’t stop him from feeling things, often even too deeply. The issue was naming the emotions he was feeling. He didn’t know what he was feeling like half of the time. So when it came to y/n, his feelings for her were so intense and unknown. He had never felt this way for anyone before. He was so confused.

Being around her felt weirdly homely and yet, he never really had a real home to come to. For him, it was only a house. It was a building with things he wasn’t really attached to and a man he couldn’t really call a father, despite DNA saying otherwise. Being with her felt warm and golden and it was like a drug he couldn’t say no to. He was constantly looking for ways to feel this specific way. It was euphoric. But he only felt this way when he was around her. And it felt like home.

She was the home he wanted to come to every freaking night. And he wanted to dance with her and have night long discussion and caress her cheeks tenderly. He wanted to kiss her more than anything else, his lips on hers staying that way until one of them needed to take a breath - oh what heavenly feeling that must be. He wanted to proclaim his feelings to the entire island - the entire world even.

Only he couldn’t. There was this rule, and he couldn’t break it. Usually, he wasn’t the kind of person to let rules determine what he should and shouldn’t do. But it was the pogue rules, he couldn’t break them. He couldn’t do that to his friends, regardless of his own feelings.

Love. That’s what his feelings were. It took him some time to realize it, but yeah, it was love. He was certain of it (which was rare for JJ). A first love, innocent, deep and one sided. At least that’s what he thought. How could she love him? How could anyone love him when even his own father didn’t? Who would want him?

Now, JJ had messed, big time.

He was sitting beneath a tree, at the edge of the yard whims the château, a few feet away from where the water started. His gaze was turned towards the sunrise though he wasn’t really looking at the magnificent show of colours that nature was offering him. He was thinking or more like regretting.

He kept replaying the event that had happened just a few hours ago on the boneyard again and again in his mind. The arrogance on John B’s face while he taunted the kooks, the empty, psychotic look on Topper’s face while he was holding J.B’s head underwater, his own hand holding the gun against Topper’s head. It felt so powerful at the moment and yet in retrospect he felt so stupid. What would he have done if something had actually happened, if someone had gotten hurt because of him?

In the spur of the moment, he hadn’t thought about it really much. How crazy it actually was. He saw his friend in a situation where he could actually die and only thought about helping him. He had this thing with him that could help save him, an object that take could take someone’s life in the matter of seconds. So he used it at his advantage. He had only wanted to help, but at what cost.

He kept picturing the expression on y/n’s face when he got the gun out. It wasn’t anger, no it was much worse, she was terrified. She had actually been scared of him. How could he ever make up for that. How he could he ever admit what he was feeling for her after he had brought her such terror. He had ruined everything.

What if she never forgot that moment? What if she never forgave him?

A branch cracked somewhere in the distance, and JJ turned to face whoever, or whatever, was lurking in the dark. He was blinded by the bright artificial light of a flashlight. “JJ?” A voice spoke and the blond immediately recognized it. Y/n.

“Can you please turn it off, I don’t think it’s necessary,” he responded, motioning to the clarity that brought the sunrise. It was light enough for them to fully see one another.

“Oh, yeah, sorry, “-she sat down beside him- “Couldn’t sleep?” JJ stared at her for a moment before taking his eyes away.

“Yeah, you could say that. What about you? John B snoring too loud?” Y/n gave a small laugh.

“Um, no, not this time.” Her smile went down. “I had a nightmare.” JJ’s brows furrowed.

“Not about um, not about tonight right?” He asked, guilt hidden in the tremors of his voice.

Images of the past night filled y/n’s mind. Her brother being held under water, JJ pulling the gun out, the loud echoing sound of the firearm as it shot in the air. She could still hear it ringing slightly in her ears.

A small moment went by before she finally shook her head in denial, earning a small sigh of relief from the blond (at least that wasn’t his fault, he already felt guilty for so many things). “No, uh, no it wasn’t that,” she said, her voice barely audible.

JJ stared at her face in the golden light of this early morning. He noticed the blank stare in her eyes and frowned. Nightmares, although worrying for most people, were pretty common for y/n. JJ of course knew this, yet something felt odd.

He rested his hand on the small part of her back between her shoulder blades. “Do you want to talk about it?” She turned her head to meet his eyes, the feeling of his skin, warm and soft against hers sending small tingles at the base of her neck.

She didn’t want to bother him with her problems, she knew how horrible his home life was compared to what she was living. She didn’t want to remind him of this not make him feel bad about her small problems when he was facing such violence on a daily basis. Still, she knew JJ and talking about his dad was the last thing he wanted to do. And his eyes, his beautiful ocean blue eyes, it’s like they could see through her. How could she lie to him?

“I, uh I-I-“ his hand went to her shoulder and he squeezed it reassuringly. “You don’t have to tell me, if you don’t want to.” Y/n felt her cheeks burning (hopefully he didn’t notice it). She took a moment to breathe in deeply the fresh air, calming herself slightly before putting her hand on his.

“No, I-I want to. I think it’ll help, in a way.” JJ cracked a sweet smile. “Alright then.”

“I keep having this one dream about my dad and I see him on his boat wandering. He’s lost in the middle of the ocean and he’s calling my name.” Saying those words, she really felt as though she could hear her father calling her name in the far distance, as if he was right beside her. Sadly, it was only her imagination playing tricks on her.

“And it keeps turning to this nightmare, where he dies in various horrible ways. Either drowned or starved or eaten by sharks.” JJ’s gaze softened, his eyes admiring her lips forming each words one after the other. “But tonight-“ she let go of his hand, shifting her body to face him completely, “-tonight, for a reason, I didn’t see him.”

“The boat was empty.”

Flashes of her nightmare came back to her like waves crashing on the beach. Her dad on his boat, a smile sketched on his lips. The sky is clear blue, not a cloud is in sight. There’s a warm breeze, she can almost feel it on her skin, and the sun is shining. It’s almost utopian, the perfect day to spend out in the sea.

Then the scene changes. The sky darkens to a deeper shade of blue, grey clouds towering the ocean. The wind is stronger, much stronger. It whistles as it makes its way in the crevices between each tree and threatens to tear the sails down. And the boat, she can see it floating hauntingly on the wild waves the same way a ghost would in abandoned castle. And there’s no trace of her father. Not even a feeling, that would tell her he’s there, trying to survive this storm.

“What if he really is gone J? What if my dad-“ she stopped her sentence to look at the horizon, somehow hoping to see a sign that would prove she was wrong. “I’m trying so hard to be positive and optimistic, but it’s been so long. What if he never comes back?”

The look in her eyes was heart-wrenching. JJ didn’t know what to say or do. He never really thought about it. What would happen if Big John was gone. To be honest he didn’t want to, that man was more of father to him than his own ever was. And losing him would be... he preferred not to think about it.

“I disagree,” he finally said. “What?” “Your dad is like one of the smartest person I’ve ever known. I think that, he, of all people would know how to get out of any situation, especially if it seems impossible to everyone else. I don’t think that you should give up on him yet.”

“You really think so?”

“Yes, I do,” he smiled. “So fuck everyone who tells you otherwise,“ y/n giggled. “Fuck all of them! You’re allowed to have hope, y/n, even after this much time. They can’t take that from you.”

“In the meantime, we’ll there’s us,” us, “the pogues, our own family. We can get through anything, right?”

“Yeah, we can.” Y/n’s head fell on his shoulder. “We’re the pogues.”

JJ admired her carefully. How her face looked, basked in the golden rays of the sun, looking so terribly tired and yet so beautiful. He could stay like this forever, losing himself completely in her smile. God she was so wonderful.

“Hey y/n/n?” “Yeah?” “Are you mad at me?” “Huh?”

“Why would I be ma- oh, oh.” The gun. He thought she was mad at him for what he did. Though he saved her brother, didn’t he? So, she didn’t understand why he would think she could hate him.

“It’s just that you looked so terrified when-” “You saved him JJ, that’s what matters most.” Y/n interrupted the boy mid sentence, placing her hand on his arm in gratitude. “If you hadn’t done anything, he could have...” she didn’t finish her sentence.

When she saw JJ holding the firearm against Topper’s head just a few hours ago, she had first been incredibly shocked. She didn’t recognize the JJ she knew. But now, she completely understood. It was his way of protecting his friends, his way of showing he cared. And that, she admired him for it. Though he could’ve shown it in a less dangerous way.

“I admit,” she added, “it was dangerous and a bit scary to see and we’re probably gonna get some kind of revenge from the kooks soon, but no one got hurt. And J.B, well he’s okay! We’re all okay!”

“Also, I’m pretty sure I did some very, very stupid things last night, so I can’t really be mad at you,” she cringed remembering the amount of alcohol influenced things she had said and done during the party. “God, I must have looked so ridiculous.”

JJ laughed at her comment. “Yes, yes you did.” “Man, John B was right, I can’t believe I’m saying this.”

“Can you just promise me something?” Asked y/n, once their laughter had died. “Depends what?”

“Promise me you’ll never hurt yourself with that thing, or anyone else for that matter.”

“I promise, y/n. ”

“Thank you.”

Taglist

@deionswannabegirl @kaelyn-lobrutto24 @poguestyle17 @im-a-stranger-thing @lasnaro @thoughtsofthestars @briandaflores19 @lunaposey @allycat449-blog @ifilwtmfc @kitty084 @coloradogirl07 @ponyboys-sunsets @chaoticbisous @p0gue420 @sloaneemily

If I forgot you or if you wanna be added/removed just tell me! Also I’m sorry if your name didn’t work :/

[tobias-hankel]

I Can’t Lose You

Summary: The team find out about Hotch and Spencer dating after the first time Hotch couldn’t keep his professionalism.  Rating T, Spencer Reid/Aaron Hotchner

Prompt: General #23 - “Hey, look at me. Focus on me alright?” with Hotchreid/Heid for 700 follower drabble.

Word Count: 1697

--

Neither Hotch nor Spencer were sure when it happened.

Whether it happened after their interview with Charles Hardwick, after the nights they spent in the same hotel room in Alaska, after Spencer confided in Hotch about his migraines in Miami or after Hotch saw just how great Spencer was with children during the case with Sammy Sparks.

Whenever it was, it didn’t matter. The two had fallen for each other and they had fallen hard.

They spent as much time as possible together. Going on dates, going out with Jack, even moving in together, all while hiding their relationship from the team.

They weren’t trying to be dishonest to their friends but it was just easier without so many hands involved. They didn’t have to worry about jokes, side eyes, or disapproving comments about Hotch being Spencer’s boss.

Hotch and Spencer kept their work relationship the same. There was no special treatment or reason for concern.

That was until a case that took the team to New York.

The BAU team was after an unsub who they believed to have schizophrenia and to be having a break from reality.

After four days of hard work, they had the identity of the unsub and were heading to make an arrest. As everyone was heading to the SUVs, Hotch pulled Spencer into a side room in the police station.

“Are you okay?” He asked, taking advantage of the empty room by leaning into Spencer, holding him by his hips and pulling him in. “You can stay here for the take down, if you need.”

Spencer sighed, “You worry too much. Just because the unsub has schizophrenia doesn’t mean anything.” Spencer gave Hotch a chaste kiss before moving back from his embrace, “Besides, I am the most trained on talking down someone in a psychotic break.”

Hotch chuckled at the smugness in his boyfriend’s voice, “I have no doubts in your abilities, baby. I just wanted to make sure.” Hotch gave his shoulder a squeeze before dropping his smile and gaining his stoic disposition back. “Let’s head out then, Reid.”

“Of course, sir.” Spencer said, unable to hide his smile as well as Hotch.

--

The take down did not go as planned.

The unsub, Shawn Smith, ran from the team as they entered his house and he ran into a neighbor’s home, taking a young woman hostage with a knife to her throat.

Hotch and Spencer entered the home first, followed by Morgan, Rossi, and Emily a minute later.

“Shawn, listen to me. It will be okay, but we need you to put the knife down.” Spencer started, putting his own gun away and raising his hands to show that he came in peace.

“No! No, I can’t!” The unsub yelled back at him, pushing the large knife he was holding up against the woman’s neck. “No! Leave me alone!” He yelled again but this time it was in the direction of an empty spot beside him.

Spencer took a step closer, “Shawn, we can help you. I can make them go away, but you have to trust me.”

Shawn shook his head roughly, “No! No one can! He never goes away!”

“Just let the woman go and I promise you I can make him go away. He will never bother you again.” Spencer took another step forward.

“Reid..” Hotch warned from behind him but Spencer ignored him.

“Just let go of the woman, Shawn.” He said quietly, trying to show that he was not a threat.

The unsub studied Spencer’s face, “Are you sure?”

“I promise, I will make him go away and never come back.” Spencer said. He knew the promise was a lie, but it seemed to be working.

Shawn loosened the grip on the woman before letting his arm that was holding the knife fall to his side. The woman jumped away from the unsub and pushed herself towards Emily, who tucked an arm around her and ushered her out of the door.

Spencer took one more step towards Shawn, “Great work, Shawn. Now I just need you to drop the knife, okay?” Shawn wasn’t listening though. He was looking over at the empty area next to him as he did earlier. “Shawn.. Let’s go get you—”

Spencer’s words were cut off by Shawn suddenly moving forward and stabbing Spencer directly in the side of the stomach, in between the straps of his bullet proof vest.

The sound of Spencer crying out in pain was completely covered up by the sound of gun shots. Hotch, Morgan, and Rossi all fired at the same time with Hotch making a headshot, killing Shawn instantly.

Shawn’s body had barely touched the ground before Hotch was next to Spencer, who was now laying on the ground as well.

“Spencer, Spencer!” Hotch cried out, holding his love in his arms. Spencer moved his arm to pull the knife out of his lithe body but Hotch stopped him, “No, you know you can’t touch it.”

Spencer was already feeling weak, so he didn’t put up a fight, instead he groaned out, “Aaron.. I’m sorry..”

Hotch moved Spencer’s hair out of his face, “No, baby. You did everything right. You are perfect.” He could hear the team moving around him. Morgan calling for a medic, Rossi checking Shawn’s body for any signs of life, but Hotch didn’t care. The last thing he was worried about was who might find out the two were dating. He couldn’t tare his eyes off Spencer.

Hotch looked down at the blood flowing out of Spencer’s torso, spilling onto Hotch’s lap and the floor. Hotch felt tears prick at the corners of his eyes.

Spencer can’t die. He just can’t.

“The medics are coming Spencer; you will be okay.” Hotch tried to comfort Spencer but he noticed his eyes folding closed, “Hey, look at me. Focus on me alright?”

Spencer fought to keep his eyes open, but he was failing fast. His body was feeling cold and starting to become numb. “I—I love y-you..” Spencer forced out.

“I love you so much, Spencer. Keep your eyes open, baby. Please.” Tears were now running down Hotch’s face. He couldn’t bare the thought of loosing another love and he had never loved anyone like he loved Spencer.

Haley was his first love, his high school sweetheart, the mother of his child, and he would always feel love for her, but Spencer was his soulmate. He wasn’t sure if he even believed in such a thing, but that was the best way to describe how he felt for the dying young man in his arms.

Spencer’s eyes fluttered closed again but this time, they didn’t open back up. “Spencer, Spencer! Please, baby! Wake up!” Hotch yelled desperately.

Just then three medics ran into the room, surrounding Spencer. “Sir, please let go of him so we can work.” One EMT said but Hotch ignored him, continuing to cry out for Spencer.

Rossi came up behind Hotch, “Aaron, come on. You need to let him go.” He said, tugging on Hotch’s arm, who reluctantly let go of his unconscious boyfriend but didn’t take his eyes off him.

The medical team got to work, checking Spencer’s pulse, trying to stop the bleeding on his side and loading him onto the stretcher. Spencer was unconscious but he still had a pulse, thankfully.

Hotch didn’t even bother to say anything to the team as he jumped into the back of the ambulance once Spencer was put inside. His mind was lost in the thought of Spencer dying.

Please, be okay…

--

When Spencer opened his eyes again, the first thing he saw was Hotch sleeping in a chair beside him. He was sore and confused, but he knew he was in a hospital. He was familiar with the sounds and smells of hospital rooms by now.

“Hey, pretty boy. You’re up!” Morgan said from the doorway, surprising him.

“Wha—Oh.. hey.” Spencer said with a hoarse tone.

Morgan pulled a water bottle out of the grocery bag he was holding and cracked it open for Spencer, “Here. Small sips.”

Spencer sat up, gasping lightly at the pain in his side. He took a few sips before letting Morgan take the bottle back. “Thanks.. How long have I been asleep?”

“Almost two days. The knife nicked your kidney and liver and they had to remove your gallbladder, but the doc said you will be fine.” Morgan said before Spencer could ask. He then nudged his head in the direction of sleeping Hotch. “He has been here the whole time. He wouldn’t even leave to shower.”

Spencer turned his attention back over to Hotch and smiled. He was glad that Hotch wasn’t the one that got hurt.

“So, when were you gonna tell us?” Morgan said, pulling Spencer out of his thoughts.

“I—uhh.. I don’t know what you mean.”

Morgan chuckled, “Drop the act, kid. Besides the fact that we heard you both say you loved each other, Hotch already told us.”

Spencer sighed, “We were going to tell you all. We were just nervous on how the team would react.”

“Well, we are all going to be gearing up our shovel talks but.. Does he treat you right?”

Spencer nodded, “Of course.”

“Does he make you happy?”

Spencer smiled and looked back at Hotch, “More than I thought possible.”

Morgan grinned, “Good. Then it’s not anyone else’s business.” Just then Hotch started to stir awake, and Morgan took it as his cue to step out, “I’m going to tell the doctor you’re up.”

Morgan was barely out of the door before Hotch jumped up, “Spencer! You’re up. How are you feeling?”

“Sore, but not too bad for being stabbed and almost dying.” Spencer smirked as if it were a joke before adding, “Thank you for staying with me.”

“I will always stay with you, Spencer but do not do that again.”

“No promises.” Spencer laughed, causing him to cringe in pain again.

Hotch moved closer to Spencer and held his hand, “Really.. I don’t think I would live through losing you. I love you so much, Spencer.”

“I love you more, Aaron.”

--

For @ssa-sarahsunshine! I feel like this is trash but I really hope you like it 😂😁 Thank you! 🖤

[dangerousconnoisseurdonut]

Magical Thieves AU

In a Gotham where about 40% of the population have some sort or magical ability and only something like 13% have two abilities, Bruce is a street rat with his honourary sister, Selina, and the two are excellent cat burglars, known as the Cat and the Bat. Selina is a Shadow Magic user; she can blend into the shadows as well as bring her shadow to life in extreme circumstances. She is called a Night Stalker, and is not trusted by many of those gifted with Light Arts. Bruce though, if anyone knew what his real abilities were, he would be locked up in the interest of public safety; he is often referred to as simply a Chaos Courtesan, despite not being a Chaos Mage.

Bruce is one of the 13% that has two abilities; the first one alone would have him be monitored for the rest of his life, Technomagic, an ability that allows him access to computer files, all kinds of electrical data, and possess mechanical devices, and those are only the surface of his abilities, but they are enough to warrant the government being worried about him. His other, arguably stronger ability, however, would have Bruce either locked up in a special facility where he never saw another living person ever again, or killed; Blood Magic. An ability that is hard to regulate as the user can literally use their own blood or that of their attackers/victims against them. They can turn a person’s blood into acid so they are eaten away from the inside out, they can track a person as well as those with Animal Magic, and they can supposedly even control people by binding their blood.

Selina and Bruce have been siblings since they were nine-years-old and Selina found Bruce wandering around, looking for something to eat. Bruce’s parents were from feuding families and when they fell in love, they were both disowned, and they became rather good thieves themselves, until the police caught up with them and killed them in a shoot-out. Selina and Bruce have stuck with each other and managed to become two of the most sought after professional thieves around, and they have been saving for the chance to get out of Gotham for the chance of a normal life. They need just one more good payday and they ca leave for good; unfortunately, that opportunity comes in the form of Roland Daggett and Rupert Thorne (Sofia and Theo work as well, I just thought something different). They are offering the pair a huge payout, in return for what others would call a suicide mission; rip-off the King and Queen of Gotham themselves, Oswald Cobblepot and Barbara Kean. Bruce is all for ignoring this job as this is beyond dangerous, but the pair are also offering papers that will identify the pair as harmless, low-level White Magic users; papers that would cost upwards of $50,000 a piece.

Selina talks Bruce into taking the job and they stake out the place to prepare for Gotham’s social event of the year; The King and Queen’s Masquerade Ball. Selina poses as someone called to do a repair job to get access to the house and they learn the layout of the house, particularly the room that holds their prizes; two beautiful rings that identify Oswald and Barbara as the King and Queen. The night of the ball, Selina attends as a low level socialite and Bruce is a waiter, both wearing one of his blood glamors to help add to their anonymity. Soon, however, a hush falls over the crowd as the King and Queen make their entrance with their respective courts. Barbara enters with her consort Tabitha, her botanist, Ivy Pepper, and her two bodyguards, Bridgit Pike and Ecco Valeska.

Then there’s Oswald with his consort, Captain James Gordon of the GCPD, his engineer, Jeremiah Valeska (Ecco’s half brother), his advisor, Jervis Tetch, chemist, Jonathan Crane, his own bodyguards Jerome Valeska and Victor Fries, his informant (and not-so-secret assassin), Victor Zsasz, and his Chief of Staff, Alfred Pennyworth. Each of them have dangerous magical abilities and none were meant to be trifled with but, if Selina and Bruce want that big payday and those papers, then trifle they must. Some time passes and the pair actually find themselves talking to members of the courts; Bridgit hates these things and enjoys talking to those who feel as uncomfortable as she does, and Bruce finds himself saving Jonathan from an embarrassing situation. Still though, once the Ball really gets going, Bruce and Selina break away to the room where the rings are housed and just as they grab the rings, Bruce feels a frisson of unease shoot up his back; they’ve been caught.

The two Courts enter the room, and Oswald reveals he’s actually flattered that Gotham’s infamous Cat and Bat Thieves have not only targeted him, but gotten so far, though he was suspicious when a random repair worker appeared at the house, given that Jeremiah always takes care of such problems. Still, as he’s an admirer of their skills and he’s in such a good mood from the party, all they have to do is put the rings back and tell him who hired them, they can leave peacefully. Bruce and Selina both know, however, if they show up empty handed, let alone give up who hired them, they will be a pair of dead ducks. When Bridgit throws a small fireball at the pair to scare them,  Bruce and Selina show their magic to protect themselves, and now Barbara finds them very interesting, offering them a fair percentage of what they would have made if they pulled off the heist. The pair still refuse to give up so easily as not having to buy those papers themselves, would save a large chunk of their savings.

Things go from bad to worse however when Jim and Alfred notice the blood charms and there’s just something too homey about them not to be handmade, and they realize that one of the pair is a Blood Mage. Once Oswald is informed of this, he’s ecstatic and informs Jerome to test the pair as the psychotic ginger is a chaos mage, and the only thing that can stand up to them are those of Order magic and Blood magic. Thanks to Jerome, they quickly figure out that Bruce is a Chaos Courtesan, and Oswald and Barbara know they need these two in their Courts. Not knowing this, Bruce and Selina make a break for it, which is helped by the fact Bruce managed to get a small sample of everyone’s blood, giving him a slight edge.

The two are about to take the staircase heading to the front door when Ivy manages to trip Selina, sending her careening down the stairs, thankfully only knocking her out. As Bruce reaches the bottom of the stairs to grab Selina, he instead is grabbed by the two Victor’s, Jim, and Jervis, who are quick to hide him in a small alcove as the other guests come to investigate Selina’s scream from her fall. Oswald and Barbara are quick to act as concerned hosts over the ‘poor dear who had a touch too much champagne and lost her balance’, a story corroborated by Bridgit and Ivy. When no one comes forward to claim her, Tabitha is quick to suggest they look after her, so they move her to a secure room.

Oswald meanwhile joins the other males, and Jervis tries to compel the truth from Bruce, but Bruce still has a vial of Jervis’ blood, and smashes it so that he can temporarily be immune to Jervis’ power. Zsasz and Fries however are quick to point out that Selina is very vulnerable at the moment and it wouldn’t be hard to...

Bruce is quick to reveal everything and give the rings back, not willing to let anything happen to Selina. Oswald orders some of his men to go to the meeting spot where Bruce and Selina were to meet Daggett and Thorne and take care of things. Bruce hopes to be able to leave with Selina once she regains consciousness, but Oswald naturally has other ideas;

Oswald: Let an injured kitten and obviously malnourished bat go wondering off into the night?! The ASPCA would have my head on a platter! Not to mention Barbara would have a separate one for my balls.

Jim: She is an avid animal lover, especially when it comes to cats. Same with Tabitha.

Oswald: Yeah, and I do not want that woman coming after me with her whip.

Bruce, starting to struggle between the two Victor’s: I will look after her; she’s survived worse falls than that! We both have!

Oswald: You see?! The kitten and no doubt baby bat, uh, what do you call a baby bat, anyways?

Jervis, enjoying himself: A pup.

Oswald: Thank you, Jervis; a kitten and a pup who are constantly being abused on the streets of Gotham?! Obviously they need someone to look after them! Do you like bats, Victors?

Victor Z: I think they’re adorable.

Victor F: Yeah, and this one is a real cutie.

Bruce: You can’t do this! Selina and I are people, not pets! We can look after ourselves!

Jim: And I’m the Captain of the GCPD, and I don’t think you can!

Alfred appears: Oswald, Ms. Kean has seen to it that her new kitten is properly situated in her new room, and I have prepared one for our bat whenever you’re ready.

Oswald: Thank you Alfred, if you would please? I wonder how much harder it is to train bats than birds?

Victor F: We’ll figure it out; besides, you always did love a challenge.

Bruce tries to cast one last spell, only to feel a sharp pain in his neck, and know no more.

For all those who liked my Underwater Gotham AU, I thank you and hope you’ll like this one just as much. Please leave a comment if you do!

[atsukashii]

chapter 16 // tell me its over

Apartment 204 - Katsuki Bakugou x reader

<< sixteen  >>

|| tell me its over  || 

Word count: 4K - because i have no chill

In which Bakugou is your hellish asshole of a downstairs neighbour, and also the cute, broody regular at your work you’ve been hitting on for the past few weeks. Things get complicated though when the past makes a reappearance, then shit kinda hits the fan.

You glance down at your phone, the screen far too bright for your eyes in your dark room. Katsuki’s last message to you is staring you right in the face, sending a sharp pain straight into your chest. Black dots dance across your vision as you remember to breathe. 

What is going on?

You know that you’re partially at fault for this, for not telling him even some semblance of the truth about your ex, but you were just trying to not be a damn burden. Why should he have to deal with that? You have had to do things on your own for such a long time, even your friends knew your boundaries - how does one even rely on someone without becoming so co-dependent that it hurts to be away from them? No, you think. Somewhere along the way, you became so used to seeing and being with him, that when you parted it hurt to breathe. Hanging your head in your hands, you press the heels of your hands into your closed eyes trying to stop the pressure from building behind them. How did you get to this point?

What a waste of time…

That line made you so mad. You knew he was hurt and mixing pure anger in with his already not-headed nature, you didn’t deserve to be spoken to like that. And you weren’t going to take it from him that’s for damn sure. Your mixed emotions were swinging between despair and anger like a wrecking ball going through concrete, and you knew if you weren’t careful it would crush everything and crumble the foundations of your very being. But Jesus Christ you just wanted to scream!

“What a fucking asshole!” You suddenly shout, feeling not even a sliver of the building pressure inside your release. You need some mood music, you decide, before you crumple into a useless ball of tears. Maybe you were just unlucky when it came to relationships. You were already aware that your communication skills sucked majorly, but you honestly thought that he was it. That he was that one person that was made just for you, and were you aware that it sounds cringe? Yes, you were. But you didn’t really care, though, if he thinks he can talk to you that way, oh he’s got another thing coming.

Getting up and walking to the stereo in the lounge, you connect your phone and turn the sound dial to deafening.

‘Look inside Look inside your tiny mind Now look a bit harder 'Cause we're so uninspired So sick and tired of all the hatred you harbor’

Turning the music up louder until you can physically feel the bass vibrating the floorboards beneath your feet, you let out a frustrated yell at your whole situation - you would rather be angry than the other option was miserable despair. You’d get to that point eventually, but right now you’re pissed as fuck. 

What the actual fuck had happened? 

One second, everything had been peachy and perfect, and the next he was accusing you of cheating on him? What utter fucking bullshit! Stomping into the kitchen, you open the cupboard beneath the sink and pull out the vodka you had leftover from your last girls’ night with Ochako a few weeks ago, and tear the lid off. 

“What utter bullshit!” You snap at nothing, and raise the rim to your lips, taking one swig. Two. Three. Suddenly, there’s a thumping under your feet that doesn’t come from the beat and you know it’s your asshole neighbor. “Fuck off!” You mumble.

What a fucking waste of time.

You want to hate him. 

You want to be violent, to punch him in the face, to scream and cry. You wanted to do something, so that he could possibly feel even a sliver of the pain you were currently enduring...but you couldn’t bring yourself to do even that. 

‘You know he’s hurting too, that’s why he bit your head off’. You would call that rational voice in your head common sense, but tonight it could get the fuck out.

Because you know that the reason this hurt so bad, the reason you are breaking down is that you loved that brash asshole that scowls too much. The one that calls you a dumbass but did so with eyes full of admiration. The one that buys you coffee even though he knows you could get it for free from your work because he can, the one who will sit in on a fucking boring ass biology lecture at 8 am in his free time because he was bored and just wanted to be with you. The one that puts your education, dreams, and aspirations at the forefront of his mind, and knows you do the same. The one that helps you study for exams. The one that knew you loved PDA and would do stupidly cute things like hold your hand and kiss you in public even though he despises public displays of affection. 

You should have told him about Shindo ages ago. You should have told him how when you’d met the raven-haired boy you were only ten. That you’d been enamoured with him until he finally had made his feelings known when you fifteen. He had been your first everything; first kiss, first love - everything. You had even chosen your current college purely so you could be with him. What a stupid move that was. He made promises that he never kept. Like the flip of a coin, his sweet and kind personality you thought you knew turned into something completely different. You could barely recognize him. Shindo Yo became the psychotic boyfriend that you should steer far clear of. Expecting you to be at his beck and call, you found that being around him no longer took your breath away as it had once before, but instead smothered you.

You should have told Katsuki how you had come home to your shared apartment to find clothing littered across the floor, leading to your bedroom. You knew what was going on before you even recognized what you had heard. You should have told Katsuki about just how much it crushed you, about how you crumpled to the floor after walking right out of your apartment. You should have told him about the slump you were in after. There were days when you wanted to scream and days when you wanted to cry. You should have told your boyfriend that your ex had cheated on you and that he was pestering you non-stop. You should have trusted him, you should have relied on him. But that’s the thing about looking back on something, you see every little mistake you’ve made and how you could have changed it, but you can’t change what’s in the past.

You know that you were partially in the wrong for this, but so was he. Who does he think he is talking to someone like that? You know he’s hot-headed and can be borderline arrogant, but the way he spoke to you? Maybe you didn’t need that in your life…

‘Your point of view is medieval…’ Lilly Allen’s voice sings through your speakers and you frown at the blank tv in front of you. You had every right to be pissed at him right now, and though you know you may never truly hate him, you could be fucking livid. The chorus hit and you stood up on your couch and shouted the lyrics along with the music. 

“Fuck you! Fuck you very, very much. 'Cause we hate what you do and we hate your whole crew, so, please don't stay in touch!” You all but scream, not caring for anything but the anger and pain trying to burst its way out of you. Your phone vibrates in your pocket and faster than you would like to admit it finds its way to your hand. 

Text from Unknown: Y/n...can we please meet up. I just want to talk to you again, I miss us. Hear me out please gorgeous... - Shindo.

You feel something inside you begin to crack as the tiny sliver of hope you had that it was Katsuki leaves you. There is no hesitation as you turn off your phone and toss it on the couch away from you.

“Why are all men douchebags?” You ask yourself, tears threatening to fall as your anger begins to shift to something else. No no no, you’re not going to cry. You are not a fucking crybaby y/n... Earlier, the idea of being alone sounded like what you needed, but now, the music blasting, your apartment felt eerily quiet and your heartbeat echoed inside your head in perfect synchronization with the beat. You just knew you as you had reread your boy- ex’s texts, you couldn’t have your friends right that second because you knew you would break down and burst into a useless puddle of tears and you were better than that. You were stronger than that. A boy wasn’t going to break your heart. Not again. 

“Do you really enjoy living a life that's so hateful? 'Cause there's a hole where your soul should be,” you mumble along with the song, sitting on the edge of the couch just listening along with the words. Your brain wanders to your friends, and then automatically to Kirishima and Kaminari. His friends were so nice to you and were people you had started to think of as your own friends. Ones he was so rude to but fiercely loyal to. Why couldn’t he be this loyal to you…

You feel sobs building at the back of your throat and try to swallow them down. It hurt too much; his accusation was a force of relentless bullets that keep ripping new wounds into you. The thought of ever doing that to someone else, of someone having to go through what you had, it made you sick to your stomach.  Your heart physically throbbed painfully inside your chest. Looking at the vodka, you decide against it and go looking for some water. 

You wouldn’t have heard of it if you hadn’t had to walk past the door of your apartment. The vigorous pounding and a voice shouting that's muffled by the music. Your downstairs neighbor no doubt. Oh, you were so not in the right frame of mind to deal with this. The pounding force rattles your door and for a second you think it may just break off its hinges. 

Jesus Christ is this person fucking insane?! 

Your somewhat ‘war’ with them had been put on hiatus recently as you had spent a lot of time between Ochako’s and the boy’s apartment as its location was much closer to school. Also with everything going on with Katsuki, you had forgotten just how much of a raging asshole the dickbag downstairs was. But now you remember every little crappy thing they had done, the blender going off before five am, his constant complaints when you were up later than eight, oh and that fucking note! The audacity that they had to pull that crap... Fury fills your blood again as you stomp towards your door, finally ready to give them a piece of your mind. You don’t care if they were an old person like you had previously assumed, they were being an insensitive asshole! Can’t they hear you’re in pain? Sniffling, a burst of anger left your mouth as you yank the door open.

“Leave me the fuck alone you miserable-” what met your gaze stopped you in your sentence, cementing your feet to the ground.

No, this can’t be happening right now. The horror in your eyes stared back at a pair of red vermillion ones, as your next breath rushed out in a gasp. His bloodshot eyes previously filled with rage that rivalled yours quickly morph into shock. 

You stare at the boy that broke your heart not even an hour ago. You look at Katsuki Bakugou and his beautiful face, and everything that happened today tears through you like a wave of blades. A pathetically broken noise comes out of your throat and you immediately slammed the door in the blonde's face.

Oh my god…

Your legs collapse beneath, you causing you to fall to the floor. Oh my god, he was your neighbor. This whole time, he had been downstairs. Katsuki had been the one to drive you fucking mad whilst also make you feel so weightless and happy. The shock causes your body to shake as sobs rip through you, no longer able to hold anything in. 

No, no please don’t let him be here. He can’t be here.

And the previously cracking piece inside of you shatters.

                                             ❀ ❀ ❀

You’re not sure how long you stay there for, back against the door, weeping as if a limb has been severed from your body. The only indication of time moving on around you is through the ever-changing music seeping from your speakers. By the time your world somewhat comes back to focus, Kodaline is playing in the background. 

There's a gentle thump on the door, and you, for a moment, ignore it. You don’t want to see anybody. As if hearing you, you feel the next tap right on your spine followed by a soft voice.

“Y/n…” You force yourself to stand up and look through the peephole of your front door, the music playing too loudly for you to determine who is on the other side. You brace yourself for the worst, not really though knowing what that is - but the sight that meets you is a welcomed one. Another broken sob rips out of your chest as you see a pair of heterochromatic eyes that you have known since you were a child. You sling open the door so fast, the slam of it hitting the opposite wall is felt through the floor. Without a second of hesitation and without a single word, you throw yourself on your best friend and let your sobs be muffled by his shirt.

“I’ve got you,” Shouto says, holding your head against his chest. Never before, have you been so glad to see them in your entire life. You’re not surprised at all by their arrival, however, because they knew you, just as you knew them. 

You feel Todo walk you inside and sit on the couch, with you tucked up next to him in silence. The music is turned off and they don’t ask what happened, doesn’t demand anything from you, Todo just holds you as Izuku whizzes around your apartment like a man on a mission.

“He-he…” You try to say, making both boys stop to look at you. Your voice is hoarse from your crying and your throat burns at the attempt, but you need to get it off your chest. Todo’s serious gaze encourages you to find your voice again and between sobs, you manage to get it out. “He was my neighbor. Downstairs.” they look at each other before looking at you, a mix between anger, disbelief, and shock.

“You’re going to come and stay with us for a few days,” Is all Todo says in response, not leaving any room for discussion as you break down crying once again. Relief floods through you, both at having them here, but also for not having to be in the same building as Katsuki. 

With haste, they gather what you need and you quickly hurry down the stairs, the boys glaring at the level below yours as if tossing up the idea of getting into a physical brawl. You know that had they known just who occupied the apartment below yours before arriving at your rescue, they would have made a quick pit-stop at apartment 104. Shouto opens the passenger door for you and quietly,  you slip inside. You wipe your nose on your sweater sleeve and try to muffle your sniffles. Once the car is started and you’re buckled in, from his spot behind you, Izuku wraps his arms around your shoulders, hugging you to the chair.  You lean back into your friend’s embrace as he kisses you on the head. 

“You want some chocolate?” He asks quietly, and Todo actually snorts.

“Contrary to popular belief, chocolate doesn’t fix anything Izuku.” 

“Really? Because I have proof that it does,” he sasses back, resting his head on your chair.

“I’m good for now, thanks Zuzu.” You look between your two friends and try your best to give them a sad smile. “Thank you for coming to get me.”

“Whatever you need, we’re here y/n.” Shouto says, and your lips wobble. God, they were so precious to you. Sensing your inner turmoil, Izuku squeezes you tighter and you chastely peck the arm across your chest in thanks. You don’t know what you would do without them, or where you would even be.

The rest of the trip is relatively quiet, only Zuzu’s humming as songs play on the radio fills the car, and you’re grateful for even that distraction. When you finally make it to their shared apartment, you open the door and there’s Ochako, pacing and looking so damn worried. Meeting her halfway, you let her pull you into her as the silent tears you can’t seem to stop, run down your cheeks. 

“We’re watching movies,” she says, leading you into the lounge where you find three mattresses on the floor. You give them all a watery smile in thanks but turns into a broken attempt at a laugh as your eyes lock onto the three bags of KFC now in Shouto’s hands.

“You feed a small army with all that food.” You smile, wiping your nose. 

“We’re basically the same thing.” Todo points out as you all sit down and get comfortable on the floor. With your friends surrounding you, you give them all another sad smile and try to wipe away the uncontrollable tears as they fall.

“I love you guys so much.” You sniffle. Pulling you into him, Todo wraps an arm around your shoulder, and Ochako hugs your waist. 

“We love you too chickadee, more than you will ever know.” But, you think as you look over them and then at the Disney opening on the tv screen, you do know, and you love them just as much.

He stands outside the door of the apartment above his own -  your door, staring at it with wide eyes. No fucking way were you his neighbor. He wasn’t a moron, or inept, he would have known that. Surely he had walked you home before?...no, you had been staying at Ochako’s a lot because it was closer to your work and classes… Your love for abba, your fucking sass, and annoying tendency to take no shit from even him that he adored. 

God, it was so obvious. How did he not fucking know?

Turning down the stairs, he all but sprints back to his room, clenching his phone so tight in his hand it almost cracks the screen. Fuck he needs to talk to someone or hit something. Some divine intervention that could prevent his phone from certain death emerged through an incoming call. Without hesitation, Katsuki answers, knowing full well who’s on the other side and his mouth moves too fast for him to comprehend. Looks like it’s talking and not hitting something.

“She was my fucking neighbor Kirishima.” he blurts out, his ass falling onto his couch as he speaks. Leaning back and he looks up at the ceiling as if he could still see her broken face when she had answered the door and seen him. He was sure that the shock on his face mirrored hers, but then the pain that it turned into... Good! She should be feeling what I felt. His brain argues against the very words, but he doesn’t care.

Katsuki manages to catch a very confused reply from his friend and rubs the bridge of his nose with his free hand. 

“She’s my upstairs neighbor.” He repeats, the situation finally daunting on him. The girl he had been dating for months was living above him, making his life hellish whilst doing the opposite when she was with him. Fuck my life.

“Fuck man,” Kirishima says distracted, and Katsuki can’t blame him. “I’m assuming you saw her or something then?” The redhead asks carefully. A growl rips out of Katsuki’s throat and he stands up, fisting a hand in his hair. He so wished that he hadn’t seen you. That someone else had opened that door, instead of your broken expression and bloodshot eyes. The way you had looked at him was as if he were something between a ghost and your worst nightmare.

“I wish I fucking hadn’t,” he admits. 

“Bro, she obviously meant something to you so I’m not surprised that you’re hurting-”

“Well, she doesn’t anymore. That shit’s done and thank god for it.” He wants to be fucking livid at you but no matter the shitty things he says about you, all he can see is your pained face and the feeling dissolves into nothing, leaving only despair in its wake. The words actually hurt as he says it, and Kirishima sighs from the other side of the phone - as if he could hear the turmoil in his voice. But the redhead doesn’t mention it. Good, because there would be hell to pay if he had.

“I’m currently staring at a half-full bottle of scotch from work right now, and am feeling kinda pathetic about drinking myself. Want some?” Katsuki knows that his friend doesn’t want to fucking drink. He works as a personal trainer most mornings during the week, including Saturdays, so getting slammed on a Friday night was something he often opted out of. But for this situation, for what his friend was going through, he’d do it. Or at least would watch over Bakugou as he got roaring drunk. 

“That is fucking pathetic shitty hair,” he replies, shaking his head at his friend’s antics. “Bring the fucking bottle or you’re not coming in.” 

“I knew you’d think so. I’ve got spiced ribs too just sitting here, I’m going to bring them too.” Katsuki would have to be an idiot to believe his friend would have one of his favourite foods just hanging around, but he didn’t object to it. “You’re second favorite bro might also make an appearance. But we can decide that depending on how much he pisses me off in the car.” For a moment, Katsuki’s lips tick up, but quickly drop again as he hears the sound of a door closing coming from above him. You’re leaving. 

Without realizing it, his hand has moved up to his chest where he gently rubs the skin above his heart. 

“I don’t care, Kirishima. Just hurry the fuck up and get over here.” He can hear Denki in the background and chooses to ignore them both before with a final curse at his friends, he hangs up the phone. His feet drag him to the window of his apartment that looks over the car parking of your apartment complex, and it’s like the world has a vendetta against Katsuki Bakugou this past week. Because there you are, getting into a car as your friend with the half and half hair closes the door behind you. From this angle, he can see you clearly through the passenger side window, and he can see the tears running down your cheeks. He has an urge to run to you, one that he blatantly ignores because you don’t deserve it. 

He’s better off without you.

Your green-haired, freckly friend wraps his arms around your shoulders - and then the car is gone. Katsuki turns his back on the window and walks towards the kitchen.

He’s better off without you. The whole thing was a fucking mistake. He doesn’t need anyone. His aspirations will take up everything he is, and he would much rather focus on that than you. 

Anything otherwise isn’t even worth a fucking thought.

a/n: whew, that was a doozy. Sorry if its a bit wordy, I just had to get it all out. This will be the only written chapter of this series, so everything from here on out is back to the social media format. We’re so close to the end now its so scary. This smau is my baby and I love it lots so its really sad. 

Tag list below. Wanna be tagged? shoot me an ask!

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if your name has a strike it wouldn’t tag :(

[giorno-plays-piano]

Rx Queen

Pairing: criminal!Bucky Barnes x Reader 

Warnings: obsession, stalking, non-con, breeding, minor depiction of violence.

Words: 2567. 

Summary: James Buchanan Barnes was the most difficult patient you had ever treated as a criminal psychiatrist. His release from prison doesn’t make things easier for you. 

_____________________________________ 

You turned off the phone and threw it on a chair, clenching your teeth. Whatever Dr. Strange wanted you to do, you wouldn’t stay another day in this goddamn place, waiting to be abducted or even murdered. It was too much. Today you found the new bottle of your favourite perfume on your nightstand. It wasn’t there before you went to bed last night. In fact, you could hardly remember the last time you bought yourself a perfume.

It all started two months ago when James Buchanan Barnes, the patient you had been working with during those seven long years, was finally released from State prison after serving 15 years of life sentence. The Soldier, as prisoners called him, once gone mad and murdered his commander. Bucky – that’s how he asked you to call him during your first seance – had PTSD, antisocial personality disorder, and severe depression. You could say he became better after all those years of treatment, including insane doses of antidepressants and mood stabilizers, but it was not enough to set him free. He was dangerous, psychotic even, yet devilishly clever: he knew how to portray a man who had reconsidered his life choices and deeply regretted taking someone’s life. 

You knew he had never truly cared. Patients like him did not have capacity for remorse.

You started treating him once you became a criminal psychiatrist; Bucky was among your very first patients. Now when you thought of it, you could hardly believe Dr. Strange just transferred a patient like him to you, a young girl with too little experience to handle an unpredictable psychopath hiding behind a façade of a victim. Of course, you made many mistakes, starting from telling Bucky about your own past and some mental issues. That time you believed you can gain trust of your patients by being more open about yourself. You were a complete idiot.

Now there was not much to do once his time in prison was up. You didn’t have true evidence to make him stay. A part of you wasn’t even sure you wanted it – when a riot had started in the prison three years ago, it was Bucky who shielded you with his own body from Brock Rumlow, a serial killer and your second most dangerous patient. Bucky was the only reason you were still alive.

But he was also the reason why you were leaving in haste, packing only necessities. 

It all started quite innocently with him sending you flowers and thanking for everything you had done for him. It didn’t alert you that he knew what your favourite flowers were. You thought it was just a coincidence since bouquets like these were sold in any flower shop in the city.

Then you stumbled upon him in a café where you often had your breakfast on weekends. It could alert you, but Bucky was sitting with a charming red-haired woman, her manicured hand resting on his thigh. She didn’t quite strike you as his sister, especially since you knew he had no relatives left after his violent father died in a car accident. Seeing such a beautiful woman with him just two weeks after Bucky was released from a prison was surprising, but you knew how seductively charming Barnes could be. Besides, he looked really good in his biker jacket, his tight black jeans showing his strong muscular legs.

In the end, you just talked to both of them a little and gave your advice on which dishes to choose. You walked away, praying you were wrong about Bucky and hoping he could settle peacefully like some of your former patients. Actually, even though many of them were imprisoned again, others were able to return to normal life. Some even had families now – from time to time you received thank-you notes with nice photos and many heartwarming words. It was probably one of the few things that made you keep your job.

It was over now. You were not going to stay in a place Bucky break into multiple times. Maybe you were not sure before, but the bottle of perfume was an obvious sign. It also meant that when a week ago you woke up and smell a man’s scent on your sheets you were not delirious. Bucky was there. He was laying beside you on your fucking bed.

How did it happen? Why didn’t you see his obsession growing with each day? You were his psychiatrist; you knew him better than anyone. How could he hide his infatuation with you for so long? Of course, you knew he had some feelings for you, but it was never that bad. You thought he would forget about you once he would be released. In the end, now you were not the only woman he saw around.

You kept stumbling upon his beefy figure more and more often. You realized Bucky was stalking you when after a month of his release you saw him watching your house from the forest. He was hiding behind the trees and bushes. It was a miracle you managed to see him at all – after 15 years he was still the Soldier, his skills remaining keen.

You tried talking to Dr. Strange. It wasn’t your first time being followed by your former patient, and police had always assisted you. But Barnes wasn’t like any of those stupid psychos who left tons of evidence behind them. Police had nothing to work with.

Well, you weren’t going to sit there and wait for Barnes to come and get you. You had no idea what was going on in his unstable mind, and you weren’t ready to take risks. You had already booked a flight to Austria tonight.

It was scary, thinking about wandering around a city you had never been, in a foreign country where you had neither relatives nor friends. But Barnes would have a hard time following you there, and that’s what mattered.

You threw a pack of salted cashew in the bag and returned to the bedroom to grab your phone from the chair. It wasn’t there. Although you dropped it just five minutes ago, your phone simply wasn’t there.

You were so fucked.

Next minute you were in the kitchen grabbing a knife, but a strong muscular arm knocked it out of your hand, and you felt Bucky’s musky scent. He stood behind your back, caging you with his bulky arms. You froze and held your breath. You knew you better obeyed the man instead of provoking him to become violent.

“And where were you going, honey?” His husky voice was enough to make you tremble. “It’s not nice to leave without saying goodbye, is it?”

“Please, Bucky.” You did your best to hide how frightened you were. “Stop.”

“No, honey.”

He leaned closer to you and buried his nose in your hair, inhaling its smell. His rough hands were already caressing your body through the clothes.

“You’re free to start a new life. You can find a good woman, have a family if you’d like.” Panic was rising in your chest. 

“That’s exactly what I’m doing.”

“No, Bucky, it’s not.” You said in a calm voice. “It will only get you back behind the bars. Don’t throw away your life, please.”

“What life?” He growled, turning you around harshly, and you almost fell on his chest, his arms holding you still. “I have no life. I should have never left my cell, you know this better than anyone else. I’m rotten. Damaged goods. I will never have the life I’ve always wanted. Do you know I have nightmares every fucking night again?”

“It’s because you don’t take your pills.” You carefully put your hands against Bucky’s chest. He tried manipulating you, you knew that. “When was the last time you had thioridazine?”

“Stay with me, and I’ll take whatever pills you want me to.” He grinned suddenly, cupping your face. 

Bucky’s strong athletic body emanated heat, and you were already sweating from both his closeness to you and an extreme agitation. Why did it take you so long to leave? You should have done it the first thing in the morning, just grab your documents and money and run to the car. Maybe then you had a chance. Unless Bucky had already been hiding inside your house…

“Why do you want to make a wrong choice again?” You felt his heart beating loudly with your palm against his chest. “You are given a chance to start over. If you want me to consult you still, I can figure something out. I can continue helping you, but you need to find your way. Don’t you think it’s good to meet new people, have friends, find a job, date a girl?”

“Who wants to deal with a psychopath like me?” He let out a chuckle, his expression darkening. “No one can handle me, doc. No one but you. Do you know I wanted to commit suicide before you showed up seven years ago? If not you, they’d already buried me.”

Before you opened your mouth to protest, he turned you around again and gently nudged you towards your bedroom. You broke out in cold sweat. If Bucky was able to outpower Rumlow, that beast of a man, he would have no problems forcing you to do whatever he pleased. It took three strong prison guards to bring someone like Bucky down. You were helpless.

“No one out there is good enough.” His breath was tickling your ear. “You’re the only one, can’t you see? Maybe I’m rotten to the core, but you still helped me. You made me better.”

You stopped in front of your bed, the white cotton sheets and blue blanket crumpled. You stormed off early in the morning once you saw a bottle of perfume on the nightstand and didn’t care to make your bed.

You needed to keep calm. As far as you could see, Bucky didn’t plan to murder you, not when you would accept him, that is. He obviously had a nice plan how to make you stay with him without police knowing, but as long as he kept you alive you still had a chance. You needed to play along.

“On the bed.” He let out a low growl, and you felt the bulge in his pants pressing against your ass.

Shivering, you took off your slippers and sat on the bed facing him. His erection was obvious; Bucky was breathing heavily, his pupils dilated. The next second he was pulling his black t-shirt over his head, and you saw his shredded body littered with scars. You saw one particularly long one on the side close to his waistline: this was the one Rumlow gave him when Bucky was protecting you during the riot. The man let out a quiet laugh when he saw your eyes focused on a nasty pink line.

“Why are you frightened, honey? I know you want a family too. You good-for-nothing ex wasn’t able to give it to you, but I can.” His hands landed on your bared shoulders, and you flinched a little. “Let’s get married, and I swear I’ll do whatever you tell me to.”

“Bucky, relationships don’t work like this.” You whispered, withholding a cry when his hand pushed you down on the bed. 

“Don’t they?” The man smiled and cocked his head to the side, removing his black leather belt. “You do something for me, I do something for you. That’s what I learnt in prison.”

You dragged yourself back as quickly as you could, but your back was pressed into the wall once Bucky put his knee on your bed. There was nowhere to run.

“Don’t be scared, honey.” His sweet voice broke the silence, and he crawled to you, slowly caging you with his bodyweight. “Let’s make a deal. You marry me, you bear my child, and I will return to prison. I don’t care if they’ll give me twice more pills or make me a lethal injection as far as you take care of my kid. You’ll love my kid, won’t you? You’ll take care of them. You’ll make them a better person than I am.”

The more he spoke, the more feverishly he touched you, his left hand pinning your palms above your head. He traced his arm along your breast, ripping your shirt with so much force that its green buttons ended on the floor. You realized your cheeks were wet with tears when Bucky kissed you on the forehead and wiped your face with his other hand.

He wanted to have kids with you. Why? Why you? Why did he consider you a perfect mother? Why did he consider returning to prison? Why was he ready to trade his goddamn life for a chance of having a child? Why couldn’t he have a child with someone else and just keep living?

Oh, of course he couldn’t. Bucky loathed himself. It wasn’t uncommon for the patients with Cluster B personality disorders, and it was probably true he wanted to end his life since you saw his self-destructing behavior. In the end, even his effort to save your life back than in the prison might be some kind of a suicide attempt. 

And the reason he wanted you and no one else… Well, you were the one who had been taking care of him all these years. The only one to navigate him through his nightmares when everyone else gave up on him. He saw good in you. He wanted it for himself. He wanted to make sure his child would never be treated the way he was.

You cried out when Bucky suddenly forced his cock into you. It felt like he was ripping you apart – he was huge. Your eyes flooded with tears again, and he cooed at you softly, pressing his chapped lips to your burning face. You couldn’t even remember when was the last time you had sex since you broke up with your ex a year ago. Thankfully, Bucky gave you time to adjust. He kept whispering filth into your ears and stroking your naked thighs. When did he take off your jeans?..

He kissed the top of your head, playing with your hair, and moved his hips slightly. You hissed in pain, but then realized it was a bit better – the pleasure started building up slowly, and you squeezed your eyes shut. No, no, you were not disgusting, your body tried to cope the best way it could, nothing else, it was a perfectly normal reaction, you knew that. Then you felt Bucky licking up the shell of your ear and whined desperately.

“It’ll be ok.” He whispered and kissed your temple. “I’ll take you to a nice place, and we’ll be there all alone. Once I make sure you’re pregnant I’ll return to prison, I give you my word.”

You bit down on your lip to muffle the noise coming out of your mouth.

“If they keep me alive, I might become your patient again.” He sounded almost ecstatic, rutting deep into you. “I’ll do whatever you say. I’ll stuff my mouth with your pills. Please, just stay with me.”

Staring at the white ceiling, you bit your tongue so hard your mouth filled with blood. You’d survive this. You’d get him behind the bars again. 

You wouldn’t stay.

[hotcheri]

Always Something There to Remind Me (a Jen/Khalil Black Lightning fanfic)

by hotcheri © 2021

DISCLAIMER: I own none of the Black Lightning characters. They solely belong to DC Comics and the CW Network. This is just my take on what could have happened after the show ended.

Prologue

Khalil's POV

They were meditating when TC crept into Khalil's mindscape like a thief in the night.

Well, at least, Khalil was meditating. He loved to empty his mind of all thoughts and focus on his breathing, relishing the mental stillness and the sense of peace he didn't have in his normal life.

Painkiller sat to the side of the mental dojo like he always did whenever Khalil was centering himself, a mocking sneer twisting his lips up as Khalil tried to ignore the rage that was baking off his mind twin like a rabid fever.

Painkiller was always angry, and the people he was mostly enraged at were the Pierces. Jen, to be exact. They lived in Painkiller's head rent free, and since Khalil shared the same mind as him, and almost all of his thoughts, the image of Jen was never far from Khalil. Pain in the ass Jen, who also happened to be Khalil's first love. What a mind fuck to love someone with all your heart while part of you needed to kill her and was in pure agony every second she was alive. Khalil didn't need anyone to tell him about mind fucks, having Painkiller relentlessly prowling through his mind was more than enough.

Every time TC appeared in Khalil's mindscape, Painkiller leapt up from his seat and started pacing back and forth in a tight little line like a tiger stalking its prey, hands clasped behind his back, nostrils flared, glaring at TC as if he wanted nothing more than to boot him out of his head after savaging him a little.

Too bad it's our head, and I'm trying to hear what he has to say.

The thought flitted through Khalil's mind grimly, and he sucked in a breath before opening his eyes and gazing at TC, who kept shooting quick little fearful glances at Painkiller. Khalil knew how he felt. Until he had started working actively with Painkiller, forcing the duality in his brain to coexist, he'd been terrified of him too.

"Uh, hi guys," TC started, his voice trembling as he looked around for exit points even though all he had to do was break the connection with the chip in Khalil's brain if he wanted to leave. Khalil supposed when someone entered a room and found themselves face to face with Painkiller, even if it was a virtual reality room, that person could get very scared very fast. In cases like that, logic was the first thing to escape.

Khalil liked the kid, had liked him even before he had locked Painkiller behind a firewall in his head and had shown Jen how to coax Khalil out of the safe space he'd created in his mind. Khalil knew without a doubt that the Pierces, especially Anissa, would have taken him out after Jen had blasted him with lightning to ward off Painkiller's attack on her family as he tried to complete the kill directive, because that's exactly what he would have done.

But TC had done the inconceivable. He'd managed to read Khalil's real thoughts, thoughts that had somehow filtered through the Painkiller operating system as soon as he set eyes on Jen. Thoughts that he must have been hiding way down in his secret heart, feelings that must have survived the A.S.A. mindwipe that transformed him into a lean, mean, biological weapon. As he lay prone on the table in Gambi's work station, on the verge of unconsciousness, his sharp ears had listened as TC, a total stranger, had his back.

"Hey. Who's Jen?" TC had interrupted the post fight argument, glancing around at the faces of people he didn't know.

Impatiently, with the touch of heat that Khalil loved and had missed with a sudden depth of emotion he hadn't felt since he was just track star Khalil, and not two warring parts of a government weapon whole, Jen replied, "That's me."

"He loves you."

And Jen's suddenly shaky, tear-filled voice had whispered, "How do you know that?"

TC's answer had been simple. "He told me."

Yeah, TC was good people. And even though the reunion between Khalil and Jen hadn't lasted, even though it had been bittersweet and doomed to fail with a painful, brusque ending, for a short, sweet time, he had been happy again.

But there was no use in thinking about that, no use in brooding over something he couldn't fix. With Painkiller in his head, being with Jen wasn't an option.

Painkiller was the first to talk, stepping forward as TC gave Khalil a half-hearted wave. "Oh, you must be crazy bringin' your ass here," he growled out in his distorted, angry voice.

TC took an involuntary step back, wringing his hands. Khalil could feel the fear in the kid increase as Painkiller stopped inches from his face, glowering down at him.

Raising a hand, Khalil talked to Painkiller like a patient parent calming down a tantrum throwing toddler. "I invited him," he lied, not caring that Painkiller would know that he hadn't.

Sharing his mind with a psychopathic, heartless killer sucked all the time, and keeping secrets was nearly impossible. Painkiller knew he was claustrophobic, that he loved trains, and that he thought about the one that got away daily. But when it came to people Khalil cared for, he didn't give a fuck if Painkiller knew he was lying to protect them from his rage. TC was a friend, and he wasn't going to let Painkiller's angry ass intimidate him.

"Don't think I won't kick your ass, too," Painkiller growled. Khalil fixed him with a steady look. He'd won more fights against Painkiller, especially after his return after a year long silence, and Painkiller knew it. After a few seconds, Painkiller sucked his teeth and resumed scowling at TC.

Spreading his arms out placatingly, TC asked, "What if I come with good and great news?"

A curious expression darted across Painkiller's face. Khalil caught it and grinned to himself. Psychotic or not, everyone liked the idea of good news.

"Speak," Painkiller ground out.

Swallowing nervously, TC said, "Tobias Whale is dead."

Okay, that was unexpected, and so was the rush of relief that coursed through Khalil's body, relaxing muscles that had been tense ever since he had started working for Tobias. Even though the A.S.A. mindwipe had taken all his memories and locked them away, they had been retrieved as soon as TC had put the firewall in his head, and so too had the underlying current of fear that always pulsed whenever he thought of Tobias.

And now his former boss, the man who had ripped out his spine and dumped him on the church steps when he was done with him, the evil torturer who had been responsible for leading Khalil over to the dark side was finally dead. Closing his eyes, Khalil sent up a prayer of thanks to a God he no longer strictly believed in.

Even after becoming Agent Odell's  chief asset, Khalil still harbored thoughts that Tobias would come to him, eager to finish what he had started, wanting revenge for Syonide's death, the attempted robbery at the club before Khalil and Jen became runaways, and every single other thing he'd done that had pissed Tobias off. He'd reluctantly come to believe that a showdown with Tobias was inevitable, and even though his road to atonement had led him to Akashic Valley and a new life, he always knew that Tobias would eventually come for him. It was in his nature. But now this piece of good news had been thrown into his lap and Khalil took a moment to bask in gratitude.

Painkiller's reaction was the polar opposite of Khalil's restrained joy. Anger blazed onto his face and his brow creased as he listened to TC give Khalil the best news he'd heard in a while.

Sounding like a petulant child after being asked if he had McDonald's money, Painkiller groaned. "Damn. I wanted to kill him." He fisted both hands into his unruly curls and glowering up at the ceiling. "That's not good news." Turning to Khalil, his voice turned wheedling. "Let me kick his ass just a little."

With a quick glance towards Painkiller, TC cleared his throat before dropping his bombshell. "I've isolated the system code for the kill order. I can free you."

TC backed away till his back was against the wall, as far as he could get from a snarling Painkiller. When he got furious, Painkiller acted just like a wolf ready to attack. Luckily, Khalil had him on a mental leash. Ignoring him, Khalil focused his attention on TC.

"TC, what is your other news?"

Khalil let out a shaky breath, a glimmer of hope blooming in his chest.

At last.

"Good." Both TC and Khalil turned to face Painkiller, who had a look on his face so unnatural that Khalil didn't immediately recognize it. He looked like a doomed man seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Is he...is he happy? "Let's do it."

"But there's a catch," TC started slowly, plucking nervously at his sleeve as his eyes slid from Khalil to Painkiller and back again. Khalil sighed, motioning to TC to continue. There was always a catch and he knew that better than anybody, but for a second he had allowed himself to believe that getting rid of the kill order that brought such pain to both Painkiller and him, finally being freed from the chains that the A.S.A had wound around his body and in his mind, was ripe for the taking, with no blowback. "It's linked to everything you know and love about the whole Pierce family. If you break the kill order, you won't remember the Pierces at all."

The breath went out of Khalil all at once, leaving him feeling weak and boneless. He was glad he was sitting down, because if he had been standing when TC spoke, the strength would have ran out of his legs. And even though this was all in his mind, his physical body had stopped breathing for a second, and he felt his heart skip a beat.

This wasn't a catch, it was a fucking dilemma. There had to be another way.

Chewing on his bottom lip, Khalil found himself thinking about the technology he and Painkiller had found in Maya's safe house. Surely there was something there that would help isolate the kill switch without messing with his memories more than they'd already been messed with? Because this alternative that TC was suggesting... it wasn't fair. After leaving Freeland to keep Jen and her family safe and away from him, hell, after saving Anissa's wife from kidnappers, after everything that had happened in Khalil's life to get him to this point in time, losing the only good memories he had left just plain wrong.

"So what?" Painkiller asked, his top lip turned up into a snarl. Whether he was oblivious to the wave of emotion Khalil was weathering, or if he just didn't care, Khalil didn't know. Painkiller knew what he wanted. He was tired of the agony that came with not fulfilling the kill order. "They're pains in the ass anyway!"

In a chillingly calm voice that brooked no argument, Khalil stared evenly at Painkiller and said, "Shut up and sit your black ass down." Shocked into obedience, Painkiller sank down to the floor as Khalil looked at TC, a pleading tone in his voice. "TC, there's got to be another way around."

"There's none." Khalil could hear the despair in TC's voice, and he knew he was telling the truth. Of course he was. "I've checked and I've double checked."

Painkiller was still silent, and Khalil turned to look at him. "Damn!" He clenched his fist so hard that the veins in his arm popped out, but he took no notice. "You won't stop, will you? Sooner or later you're going to kill Jen and the rest of the Pierces."

Nodding sagely, like he had been the one meditating, Painkiller said, "Best believe. But I'm not nobody's puppy." He pointed at Khalil, his face stern and absolutely serious. "Cut the damn cord."

The muscles in Khalil's jaw worked as he stood up, turning his back on TC and Painkiller so that they couldn't see the emotions playing across his face. He wanted to be free of the kill code more than anything, needed Painkiller to be at rest so that he could figure out a way to become whole again. But the cost- losing Jen again- was it just too great?

Khalil closed his eyes, and suddenly, he was back on the Pierce's roof with Jen after Painkiller had broken free of the firewall for a couple of nasty minutes to wrap his hands around Jen's neck. He could feel everything in that moment, the wind brushing lightly against his face, the shingles of the roof under his sneakers, the terrified look Jen shot him before schooling her features into a coolness Khalil had never seen on her face. Both looks hit him like a ton of bricks.

She was scared of him.

Painkiller had shown her his true colors and had, once again, pushed someone he loved away from him. And what she had said had chilled him to the core, a sudden lump rising in his throat, and tears smarting in his eyes as she let him go.

"I can't love a weapon that's pointed at my family, even if it does have a soul." Her shoulders hunched pitifully as she wrapped her arms around her legs, all at once seeming far younger than her years. "See you around, Khalil."

He took one last look at her, her curly hair brushing past her chin, her eyes chilly and flinty in the dusk as she turned away from him, blinking away tears of her own. "No. You won't," he said, and with that, he had exited Jen's life.

Some things you can't go back to. The way Jen had ended things between them still hurt, and the realization that he wasn't going to be able to salvage things with her caused him pain that was almost physical, but if TC was able to isolate the kill code and erase his memories of her, the pain would go. All the pain would disappear, and his fresh start in Akashic Valley would be just that, a fresh start.

Behind him, TC started to say, "If you need more time, I can-," but by now, Khalil's mind was made up. There was no other choice.

"I always known I'd give my life for that girl." Khalil heaved a sad sigh, running a hand over his face as he turned to look at a nervous TC and an impassive Painkiller. Painkiller smirked, knowing what decision Khalil had made, and in that moment, Khalil hated him, the A.S.A., Odell- everyone who had gotten him into this situation. Especially himself. "Never thought I'd have to forget her." A nod towards TC. "Do it."

TC nodded dumbly, just as another thought flitted into Khalil's mind. If TC was able to isolate the kill code and erase some of his memories, wasn't it possible that he could remove his very worst memory?

Before he left Freeland for good after shooting Odell and letting Black Lightning deal with the evil son of a bitch however he saw fit, Khalil took a detour to the cemetery, picking a bunch of blooming flowers from the ramshackle garden of Mrs. Sutton, the Payne's old landlady. Khalil didn't think she would mind, she had loved Nichelle Payne dearly.

Once at the cemetery, he had laid the flowers on his mother's grave, sat down with his back resting against her tombstone and cried a little. Nobody had been around to see him; Freeland residents weren't crazy about going to the graveyard at nighttime.

"I shot the guy who made me kill you, ma," he'd whispered, his words blown away by the breeze as the tears blurred his vision. "I know you always said vengeance never pays, but I had to do it. I'm sorry, ma. I love you, and I'm so, so sorry."

Nichelle Payne had raised him to be the best in whatever he did, and what had he done in return? Snapped her neck, and the best excuse he could come up with was he'd just been following orders. The knowledge weighed heavily on his soul, and he knew that he would pay for it in time. Everything comes due. But if TC could somehow make him forget...

"I can try," TC said doubtfully, and Khalil raised his eyes from his clenched fists, remembering where he was through the sadness that engulfed his soul.

"No." Khalil shook his head, resigning himself to reality. "It's part of who I am, and I need to find redemption for it, or a way to live with myself."

TC opened his mouth and hesitated before shyly asking, "Do you want to- I mean, I could give you Jen's number and you could talk to her one last time?"

Painkiller groaned, storming around the circumference of the dojo angrily. "Can we fucking do this already? No more flashbacks, no phone calls- get this kill order the fuck out of my head!"

"Our head," Khalil reminded him. "And right now, I'm in charge." He bit his lip, wrestling with himself. Saying goodbye to Jen wouldn't make things better, it would just bring home the truth that he would never see his first girlfriend again, and even if by some weird coincidence he did, he wouldn't know her. It was stupid. They already said their goodbyes on the Pierce roof, what would he gain from this? "What's her number?"

Painkiller actually growled at this and stomped off somewhere. Khalil could still feel him burning in his mind, but it looked like he had opted out of being a part of Khalil's final goodbye. Not that Khalil minded in the least. Before Painkiller, his relationship with Jen had been special. He didn't want his insane mind twin tainting the very last moment he would have with her.

Courteously, TC severed the connection with Khalil's brain chip, promising to return when the phone call was over and start the process. Khalil stared down at his phone and punched in Jen's number before he could lose his cool. Meditation seemed like a lifetime away, it was all he could do to keep his heart from galloping away like a war horse.

Jen's phone rang once, twice, three times, and Khalil was just about to hit the end button when suddenly-

"Hi." Jen's bold, brash voice was in his ear, and Khalil forgot to breathe. The background noise was filled with laughter and music, a noise that Khalil associated with family time, even though he was never fortunate enough to have enjoyed family time with his mother working two jobs, his father in jail, and his brother running the streets with the 100. "You know you're calling from a- Anissa, stop!" Khalil closed his eyes, savoring the sound of Jen's hearty giggles as someone- Anissa, probably- tickled her or something similar. "You're calling from a private number, who is this?"

A male chuckle sounded, and Khalil recognized Gambi's voice sounding from the distance. "Probably a scam, hang up before they get all your info."

Same old Gambi, trusting nobody. A wistful smile turned up Khalil's lips, but he still couldn't come up with a thing to say. It was like all his thought circuits were down, and he wondered if Painkiller had something to do with it.

"Helloooo? Who is this?" Jen's voice turned speculative, and she gave a derisive snort. "This better not be TC playing with me again, how many times do I have to tell you I'm not going to prom wit' you?"

"I'm literally right here," TC protested in the background.

And Khalil found that he couldn't bring himself to say anything, let alone goodbye. He wasn't great with goodbyes, anyway, so who was he fooling? "Uh, sorry," he muttered. Why had he thought this would be a good idea again? "Wrong number."

In the few seconds it took for him to press the end call button, Jen's voice sharpened with recognition and she exclaimed, "Wait, that sounds a little like-."

Call ended blinked up at him from his phone screen as his pulse jumped in his throat. Safe getaway. Of course, he'd ended the call before Jen could say his name, or even more hurtful, the name of somebody else.

But fuck, hearing her voice was bittersweet.

"You hung up?" TC was back in his head, eyes gleaming with relief that Painkiller wasn't around.

Nodding, Khalil strove to keep his face blank and impassive. "Yeah. I'd rather remember her the way she was on that phone, happy, carefree, pain in the ass J."

She sounded happy and normal, like the old her, before the 100 had kidnapped her and she had discovered she had powers. She sounded like the Queen of Garfield. By coming back into her life even for a few seconds, he might jeopardize that happiness, and if there's one thing he wanted her to be after the events of the past few years, it was at peace and she wasn't going to find it with him.

"But you didn't get to say goodbye."

Pity was written all across TC's face, and once again, Khalil felt the wave of sadness engulf him. Did it ever stop? Even with his memories of Jen gone, would he really be at peace?

"I didn't need to." Khalil stopped, his shoulders slumped, and came to stand next to TC, who was still looking at him with that sympathetic look on his face. "TC..."

Looking up at him, TC said, "Yeah?"

"Don't tell her."

TC let out a dramatic gasp that made Khalil crack a smile, even though he had never felt less like smiling. "What? But I was just about to-?"

"No." Khalil shook his head resolutely. "Let her live her life." TC opened his mouth to protest, but Khalil talked over him. It was the only way. "You told me she lost the guy she was seeing, and she's already lost so much. Just- let her think what she's been thinking, that I left Freeland to live my life." He started pacing like Painkiller sometimes did, back and forth, his arms behind his back as he spoke. It felt like atoning for his sins. "I poisoned her. I almost killed her."

Interrupting, his voice utterly horrified, TC exclaimed, "That was Painkiller, not you!"

"Yeah, but don't you get it? He's in me, so even if I know that I'm not the one doing the poisoning, everyone else thinks it, because he's in my head wanting to kill all the time." Khalil stopped pacing and turned to TC, his face serious. "With the kill code gone, we can co-exist without the anger and rage that drives Painkiller. I came here for a fresh start and removing the memories of the Pierces will give me that." To show that he meant business, he clapped his hands together. "Let's do this. How's it gonna work?"

Getting back to business removed the pity from TC's face, and Khalil was glad. Seeing that look on his normally cheery friends face and knowing it was directed at him made him feel like even more of a shitty person.

Tapping his chin, Khalil asked, "So I won't remember that they're metas as well?"

"You'll forget about them. Anything related to them, too."

TC's eyes started to flash green as he went over the logistics of changing Khalil's life.

"No, you'll remember that, you'll know about Black Lightning, Thunder and Lightning, you just won't know their identities. You won't remember they're Pierces."

Nodding, Khalil said, "Got it." Actually, it sounded confusing to him, but he would cross that bridge when he came to it. "But if I want to reinstate my memories, can't I just come to you and-."

TC laughed as Khalil made a casual popping noise with his tongue in his cheek. "No. You won't even know that your memories are gone."

"And you're sure they'll stay gone."

This was the most important part. What ifs ran through Khalil's mind with the speed of a Formula One car. If he somehow ran into the Pierce sisters on vacation. If he helped someone from a mugger and it turned out to be Doctor Pierce? If Black Lightning ended up in Akashic Valley like Anissa had and they ran into each other?

Shifting from one foot to the other, TC said, "Um, 90% sure."

"90?" Khalil asked incredulously.

TC shrugged. "That's an A."

"I used to get straight A's in school," Khalil said musingly. "And then Odell dropped a few Master's degrees into my head, but that happened after I stopped caring about grades." TC gave him a confused, yet concerned look, and Khalil said, "Let's get rid of these memories."

A few minutes later, Khalil was lying on an operating table, a brain scanner that looked like a crown on his head. Philky just happened to have one lying around, which was pure Philky, and after TC had uploaded his program into the lab's computer, he'd told Khalil's master of tech exactly what to do. Donald was on standby in case something went wrong medically. And Painkiller? He was still in the dojo, and Khalil could feel the excitement thrumming through him. Khalil didn't blame him; he was excited too.

A high-pitched whine started up, and Khalil felt a pinprick of electricity tickle his forehead as the process started. TC had warned him about this.

What TC hadn't warned him about was, as the memories left, they replayed in his head, almost like a flashback reel.

Khalil saw himself on the Pierce roof with Jen, giving her a chaste, shy kiss as she agreed to be his girlfriend.

He saw himself stealing into Garfield High and meeting up with Jen by the lockers after enduring more abuse from Tobias, knowing that she was the only person he could really talk to despite what had gone down between them. Sitting down in silence, not needing to say a word because their connection was that powerful.

He saw them running away together, Jen using her lightning powers in front of him for the first time and blasting the 100 hoodlums. How he'd kissed her later on and it had been electric, and the hottest kiss he'd ever had.

He saw himself (the memories were blurry around the edges, soon they'd be gone but so would the kill code, it was for the best but it hurt, TC didn't say it would hurt this much) sitting next to Jen in his special place, his private place, his favorite place, the abandoned subway car, eating ramen and reminiscing on how he had asked her to be his girlfriend, and he had been so shy when he gave her the necklace, something that had caught his eye in Freeland's jewelry store and he'd saved up for two months to buy it for her, a necklace he was giving to her for the second time because he loved her, and he'd lost her once and wasn't about to let her go again and...

The memories faded as Khalil's mind cycled through the deepest, darkest levels of consciousness, and there was only darkness, and finally, blissfully, peace.

(See more on ao3 or wattpad!)

[lloyd-needs-therapy]

Random thought but when I was rewatching season 6, I just realized that it actually shows that Lloyd knows how to pick locks. When they were arrested he breaks them out of the hole by picking his lock with a fork. So have this oneshot...

Picking Locks

They think they can make fun of him, he is Lloyd Garmadon for heaven's sake. He is so fed up with them not calling him evil. So if everyone says he not evil well hes gonna show them how wrong they are.

He needs a plan something big. Pranks won't work thats to basic. He could try get good grades, if he got good grades then it shows how good he is at being bad. Yeh thats the plan, soon everyone is going to regret being mean to him.

***

"Okay class today, you're going to be picking locks, as you can see you each have a standard lock on your desk. The instructions are on the board, you have ten minuits. If you fail to unlock it in the time given you will be punished. You may start."

Okay Lloyd c'mon you can do this. It's simple all the instructions are on the board. He can't fail at this, because if he fails, he'll be punished and those punishments hurt. Okay if he jigles it this way he should feel a light click. Ughh why can't he feel a click. All he needs to do is push the pins on the inside of lock up and put a little bit of pressure on it with the paper clip and it will unlock, simple. Although it's not simple, its hard.

"One minuit left" the teacher anounced. Only a handful of people had theirs done.

Wait he nearly has it just click there...

"10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5,"

Click, he's done! With 5 seconds to spare. He can't believe it! He thought for sure he was going to fail.

"1, Locks down everyone if I see a single hand on thier lock i swear... Anyways the people who didn't finish will meet me here after school for their punishment and trust me I know who didn't get there's finished. Okay now leave you little brats before I make you."

Everyone packed up there things and started leaving when the teacher came over to Lloyd.

"Cutting it close there Garmadon. This is the first time i've ever seen you succed at anything you worthless brat. Keep this work up and you might make it."

"Yes Mrs"

And with that Lloyd took off to his next class.

***

"All you need to do is kill it!" His teacher next to him told him with frustration over Lloyd's hesitance, in his voice.

In Lloyd's hand was a little mouse, it was a very small one, with white fur and big adorable eyes that seem to be staring into his soul, begging him to let it live. It was like it was mocking him. He needed to kill it for him to pass this class. Lloyd so desparetly wanted to kill it so he could prove to everyone that he was evil like his father. So far he was acctually doing good at his classes, but when it came to hurting anyone or in this case anything, he just couldn't.

A small part of him, that he has tried to burry for so long, kept coming up and it would remind him that everything about this place is wrong. It almost buzzed like it was alive, but that was just his imagination.

He just couldn't get rid off it the only time the buzzing stop was when he did something good but he couldn't do good because he was born to be evil.

"Hurry up"

Lloyd was to scared to speak back so he started to squeze his hands shut. The little mouse let out a sqeek when he started to squeze harder, It looked up at him with big eyes and Lloyd finally broke, dropping the mouse.

"I- i" Lloyd felt like his throat was closing up the more he tried to speak.

"Save it, your a disappointment to the Garmadon name, we noticed the way you care for others but we had hope to snuff the light out of you."

"B-but I do g-good in my other c-classes."

"That is true but for all of your other classes to matter you need to be cold hearted or else you won't survive in this world"

"Y-yes sir"

***

Those memories feel like ages ago or like they happened in another life. After he was kicked out he spent a good time on the streets then he met the ninja and his life changed for the better. But now he was in jail because the stupid djinn framed them. He is so sick of being in jail, Wait!He can just grab a fork from the cafeteria and pick the locks, ughhh he so stupid, he could off done this alot sooner.

Well he got the fork but now there in this thing called the hole, oh well they're getting out of here either way.

After they broke out he really forgot that he didn't tell anyone he knew how to pick locks. So obviously that was a convorsation starter with his big sis, while the other were talking to Captin Soto.

"Lloyd you never told me that you could pick locks." Nya exclaimed.

"Well yeah I guess it never really came up" Lloyd shrugged

"When did you learn to pick locks, thats not something any of us taught you"

"Well I did go to a school where they taught you how to be evil, I learned alot of other things too, but I don't think any off them really go with the whole 'saviour of ninjago' thing" laughed Lloyd

"Yeh I suppose so".

Nya remebered reading Lloyd's file from darkly's with the other ninja. It said that he was a good student, but got kicked out because he was to good and kind. In there words 'he did not have the moral ambition to be one of tomorrows master minds' or thats what Lloyd told them anyways.

***

Its been a few days since his father had taken over ninjago and to be honest he wasn't faring well. Not like ninjago was doing any better with buildings collapsing, people getting hunted down, people dying and the list goes on and on. He was currently over looking the city from the roof of there hide out.

Just his luck his family was dead, he was being hunted down by his newly resurrected, deranged father, who had put him in a coma and disowned him all in one night, and Harumi his psychotic ex? Were they even together? he really dosn't know. All he knows is he had been too trusting and too good and what had that gotten him? Destiny had set him up to fail before he was even born. He probably has a good few bets resting on him up in cloud kingdom. There was a sound of the rooftop door opening but Lloyd kept starring off into the sky.

"I knew I would find you up here"Nya said softly.

Lloyd didn't reply, he didn't trust himself not to breakdown right there. Altough there wouldn't be much tears. Lloyd thought bitterly, another thing darkly's forced out of him. After what felt like an eternity of silence he spoke.

"You know when I was little I wanted so bad to follow in my Dad's shoes" Lloyd laughed shallowly.

"Lloyd, this man isn't truely your father, your father is the father that loved you and would never even think about hurting you"

"Did I ever tell you why exactly I got kicked out of darkly's?"

"You said something about 'lacking ambition'" Nya recalled

"Well they told me I wasn't cold enough, that I needed to be cold hearted to survive in this world, after I couldn't kill a mouse. I guess they were right, I opened up my heart and now look what thats done." Lloyd motioned at the city.

"Lloyd you're caring, loyal, trusting, a great leader, an amazing baby brother and so many more. Don't let this stop you, I promise we will rise above all this and when that time comes you can laugh at all the people who told you any different."