#he gets the honour of explaining to theatre that everything is going to be okay and that his fear is okay and he can learn to overcome it

[hershelwidget]

Gay people

It’s been less than an hour since they ate the soup btw

[capseycartwright]

miss me, but let me go

“I have - I’ve carried this grief, for you, for so long, and I know I can’t let it all go, because a part of me is always going to grieve for you,” Eddie paused. “But I can’t feel like this forever, Shannon. I don’t think you’d want me to, either. So - I need to let some of it go. Okay? I need to - I need to be myself now. For me, and for Christopher. I want to be me."

On November 1, Eddie builds an altar for Shannon and finds a way to let her go.

ao3 link

November 1. The date is not one Eddie is likely to ever forget. Even before Shannon died, Dia de los Muertos wasn’t a holiday he ever missed - as a child, he would help his abuelo make their altar every year, a picture of his abuelo front-and-centre, Edmundo Diaz Senior, the man he’d been named for, looking sharp in his suit as he looked out from the glass picture frame where he’d lived all of Eddie’s life. He’d never met his grandfather - only carried his name. 

Over the years, more faces found a home on the altar - friends, and family, time a fickle thing and the only certainty about life that it ended. Death was familiar, a constant in a world Eddie felt like he could never quite figure out.

After Shannon died -

The first November 1 after she died, Eddie built his own altar for the first time, explaining the tradition to Christopher. They had done it every year since, Christopher’s face in a set line as he made sure everything was absolutely perfect. No less than his mother deserved, Eddie knew. 

Shannon hadn’t grown up with the traditions of All Saints and All Souls, but she’d embraced them wholly when she and Eddie had gotten married, making the altar herself when Eddie wasn’t there. It felt right to honour her with the traditions she had loved herself. That was why Eddie had taken to adding a picture of Shannon’s mother to the altar too, when she died the year after Shannon did. Breast cancer, they’d said, but Eddie knew heartbreak had been the thing that had pushed her over the edge.

Every year, Eddie celebrated Shannon, and her mother, his grandfather, the people he’d served with who had died - 

Except this year.

Eddie felt bad. Really, he did - he was going to build the altar himself, but when his dad had texted a picture of the Diaz family altar, Shannon front and centre, Eddie couldn’t quite bring himself to make his own. Shannon was being remembered - that was what mattered. He’d gone to her grave instead, only half listening as the priest had said mass over the graveyard, praying for the salvation of the souls who were buried there.

Grief was a funny old beast, Eddie knew. Grief had made him do crazy things - grief had driven his son to Texas, for crying out loud. The grief didn’t hit standing by her grave, but it did when dusk descended over Eddie’s house, and the absence of an altar began to feel like one of the worst things he’d done amongst a year of terrible decision-making.

Maybe he should have taken Buck up on his offer of coming over to make an altar with him, but Eddie had asked enough of his best friend in the last four months. Eddie knew Tommy had bought them tickets for some movie Buck was dying to see, and as much as Eddie was a near-professional third wheel now, he didn’t think he’d make a good addition to the back row of their local movie theatre.

Eddie winced as he looked at the candle he’d swiped from the dining table. “It’s cedarwood,” he said, apologetic as he lit it, setting the candle down in front of the framed picture of Shannon that lived on their fireplace. “I know you hated cedarwood, but I’m working with what I’ve got here, Shan.”

Eddie pressed his cheek against his folded arms, taking one, two, three shaky breaths. “I really struggled after you left, Shannon. I don’t think I really even realised how much until now - and it’s not just because you were gone, but you were gone and you wanted a divorce, and I - suddenly, I was never going to get answers.”

He’d been talking about Shannon a lot in therapy, lately, unpacking all his complicated feelings during his excruciating weekly hour with Frank. 

“I don’t know if I even wanted to stay married to you,” Eddie admitted, the candle flickering in the growing dark of his living room. That was terrifying to admit out loud - that even if she had stayed alive, he and Shannon wouldn’t have made it work. There were a thousand reasons why, and Eddie could sit, and list them all, but one was more important than the others. 

“I think I’m gay, Shannon,” Eddie had never said it out loud before, despite the thought never quite leaving his mind, Pandora’s box open, now. “If you were here, I bet you’d have such a laugh with that - not like, in a bad way. Just - I think you’d find it funny, that your mom’s gaydar was right after all.” 

He couldn’t help but laugh at the thought himself. Shannon’s mom had been the bitchiest woman he’d ever met, and Eddie loved her for it. 

“I’ve made such a mess of things,” Eddie paused. “But with you, most of all. I’m sorry - for my part in it all. I thought I was doing the right thing, joining the army. I just wanted to take care of you and Chris, and I didn’t see any other way out. I know it was the wrong choice - but I really thought it was the right one. You know?”

Shannon’s picture stayed silent. 

“I have - I’ve carried this grief, for you, for so long, and I know I can’t let it all go, because a part of me is always going to grieve for you,” Eddie paused. For the life she might have had, if not for the car crash - Eddie sometimes liked to indulge himself and think of an alternative life where Shannon had survived, where they got divorced, and learned how to co-parent, and maybe they found their way back to being friends. It was a nice thought.

Eddie wiped roughly at his eyes. “But I can’t feel like this forever, Shannon. I don’t think you’d want me to, either. So - I need to let some of it go. Okay? I need to - I need to be myself now. For me, and for Christopher. I want to be me.” 

With a shaky hand, Eddie pressed a kiss to the framed picture, setting Shannon back down with the candle. It was a half-assed altar, and somehow, that made Eddie feel worse. He scrambled to his feet, heading for his bedroom, and the box of Shannon’s belongings he knew was stashed at the back of his wardrobe. He hadn’t kept much for himself - most of it was for Christopher - but he had a few things. There was a necklace in there, he knew that Eddie had bought her for their first wedding anniversary. It was a cheap thing, because they were always broke, but it was something of hers - it would make it a more acceptable offering.

Eddie couldn’t help the breath that hitched in his throat as he spotted what was in his bedroom. A butterfly, resting on his pillowcase, on the side he always slept on. “Hey, little guy,” he whispered softly, not wanting to startle the tiny creature. His abuela loved butterflies - they were spirits of the people you loved, who had left, coming back to visit. Eddie felt slightly ridiculous, but he said it anyway. “Shannon?”

The butterfly didn’t move. 

“I’m so glad Christopher isn’t here, because he would really think I’ve lost it,” Eddie crouched by the side of his bed, holding out a finger. “Hey. Is this your way of telling me it’s okay to let you go? Did you hear all of that?” 

The butterfly moved, tiny wings fluttering as it came to land on Eddie’s outstretched finger. 

“I hope that’s a yes,” Eddie knew tears were streaming down his cheeks, now, but he didn’t want to freak the butterfly out by wiping them away. “How did you get in here, eh? None of the windows are open.”

If Eddie Diaz believed in a higher power, still, he’d blame God - or the universe. 

“Let’s get you outside,” Eddie said, and the butterfly flapped, a little, coming to land on the windowsill instead. “Yeah? You’re ready to go?”

The butterfly flapped in response again.

“I think I’m ready to let you go, this time,” Eddie admitted, carefully unlatching the window. “We’re going to be okay, me and Christopher. I promise. You can go. You don’t need to worry about us.” 

The butterfly seemed to pause, for a second, before it flew out the open window, disappearing into the beginnings of the evening. Eddie wasn’t sure how long he stood there, tears pouring down his cheeks, rolling off the curve of his chin and onto his shirt, but the next thing he knew, he could hear - 

“Buck?”

“Eddie! You’re a firefighter - how long have you left that candle unattended, huh? Eddie - Eddie, where are you, man?”

Buck appeared in the doorway of Eddie’s bedroom, a family-sized bag of sour patch kids tucked under one arm. “Do I need to teach you the basics of fire safety all over again?” he huffed, pausing as he noticed Eddie’s tears. “Eddie - you okay?”

“Yeah,” Eddie offered his best friend a teary smile. For the first time, Eddie might actually mean that yes. “I’m okay. There - there was a butterfly,” he explained, gesturing at the window vaguely. “I had to let it out.”

“A butterfly?” Buck looked confused. 

“My abuela always said butterflies were the spirits of people who’ve died,” Eddie explained. “I lit a candle for Shannon, and there was a butterfly just sitting on my pillow, when I came in here. It’s…” he paused. “It’s stupid.”  

Buck’s face softened. ‘It’s not stupid,” he shook his head. “You think it was Shannon?”

Eddie glanced at the window again. “I hope it was,” he admitted, taking a deep breath before he closed the window. That in itself felt like symbolism, Eddie decided - a closing of a chapter he should have let go a long time ago. That’s what he needed it to be, at least. “Wait - aren’t you meant to be on a date?”

Bcuk shrugged. “We changed the tickets to tomorrow,” he explained, holding up the bag of candy. “You said you weren’t going to make an altar, and I didn’t want to let you skip out on it. These were her favourite, right?” 

Eddie could cry all over again. Buck, like Shannon, hadn’t grown up with Dia de los Muertos, but here he was, with a bag of Eddie’s dead wife’s favourite candy, ready to sit in Eddie’s grief with him. Eddie wasn’t sure what he’d done in a previous life to deserve a friend like Evan Buckley, but he thanked whatever God or universe was listening for giving him Buck anyway.

“She’d eat so many she’d give herself a stomach-ache,” Eddie grinned, and the memory didn’t hurt, the way it used to, the grief a dull ache that he could grow around, now. He leaned into the embrace Buck offered, breathing in the familiar cedarwood scent of Buck’s favourite cologne. “Thanks. For being here.”

“Nowhere I’d rather be,” Buck hummed, pressing a ridiculous, loud, smacking kiss to the top of Eddie’s head. Eddie loved him. “But I’m buying you one of those electric candle warmers if you’re going to keep leaving candles unattended, Eddie.” 

Eddie was mostly listening as he let Buck guide him back to the living room, the candle still flickering golden in front of Shannon’s picture. It was the same one he’d put on her memorial programme - bright, and beautiful, just like she’d always been when she was alive. 

Buck grinned, as he set a piece of candy in front of her picture. “Berry,” he explained. “My favourite,” he added, tossing a handful of the sour sweets into his own mouth. 

They sat, the television playing reruns of a procedural in the background, eating candy until their stomachs hurt, the candle burning all the way to the end. 

The butterfly didn’t come back.

Buck stayed.

Eddie was ready to move on.

(Buck stayed.)

[ladydimitrescuspet]

All Yours [NSFW]

AO3 link! sorry it's been a while! been dealing with writer's block a bit, but please enjoy! sorry for any grammatical errors, wrong words, etc! and enjoy some bad smut! and tell me what you think if you want!

97 + 100: “I think you forgot to lock the door, that means anyone could walk right in and see you like this.” and “Call me selfish, but I don’t ever want anyone else to touch you.” Added for 100, anon requested: alcina gets possessive because the girls dote on reader too much! and whoops my finger slipped, I also added in a little moment with the daughters!

***

Every week you got to spend one whole day with Alcina’s daughters. It had started off as Alcina’s way of letting the girls “play” with you until she decided that she wanted you for herself when she realised just how taken they were with you. Your day with her daughters this week just so happened to fall on the same day as the soiree Lord Moreau was hosting.

“Ew, you and Mother are going to a party at Moreau’s?” Daniela asked. You nodded your head. “Then you’re definitely gonna wants some rain boots.”

You let out a small laugh and then a gasp as Daniela tightened the laces on the back of your corset. “Lucky for us, it’s not at the reservoir. It’s at his theatre.” You said.

Cassandra stopped mid painting your nails. “He has a theatre?” You nodded your head. “If he’s putting on a play then you should bring some dark glasses in case you want to fall asleep.” Daniela snickered at the Cassandra’s comment whilst Bela hit her shoulder. “Ow! I’m just kidding.” Cassandra grumbled before she continued painting your nails.

Bela walked into the closet. “Do you want flats or heels? Mother would much prefer you in heels, but it’s your choice.” She said.

You pondered her question for a moment before replying. “Heels.”

“Good choice.” Bela said as she walked out with a pair that matched your dress. “Now for jewellery. You should definitely wear the necklace that has the family crest on it, the one Mother got made for you.” You nodded your head in agreement.

“Do you think she’ll like this?” You asked as you smoothed out your dress.

Daniela turned you around to face her. “If Mother doesn’t water at the mouth and want to rip this off you then I will.” Daniela said before she booped your nose.

You gave her a small smile at her attempt of reassuring you. “I’m sure your Mother would be appreciative of that comment.” You mused at her. You could tell Daniela wanted to apologise but you waved her off. “I promise, it’s fine. Just don’t let her catch you saying things like that towards me.” You said, winking at her.

“Okay, okay, stop this before I have to explain to Mother why Y/N isn’t downstairs yet.” Bela said before she put the necklace with the Dimitrescu family crest on you. “There, now you look perfect. Mother’s going to love this.”

You flushed a bit. “I certainly hope so or I might just have to take Daniela up on her offer.” You replied and Bela hit your shoulder. “I was only kidding, although…. Sorry, sorry, I’m only joking, I swear!” You squeaked out when Bela gave you a playfully hard look.

Cassandra let out a snort. “You know, Mother thinks we’re too soft on you.” She said. “I think she’s a little jealous.”

“Your mother, jealous?” Cassandra nodded her head. “I’d say that’s absurd, but I know your mother and she can get quite jealous. For example, the baker in the village was simply being nice, albeit a bit flirtatious, and when I tipped her handsomely for adding in a few extra things to my order, Al almost decapitated the poor thing.” You grimaced a bit at the memory.

“Well, you’re Mother’s and you know she’d do just about anything to remind those down in the village of that.” Bela replied. “Come now, Mother’s probably downstairs awaiting your arrival. Would be rude if you were late to Lord Moreau’s.” Bela said as she took you by the elbow to guide you out of the room.

The four of you made your way to the main hall, stopping at the top when you saw the Lady of the Castle. “My, my, darling, you clean up rather nicely, but you didn’t have to get dressed up all for me.” She says teasingly.

You flushed at the compliment and quirked your eyebrow at her. “It’s a rather good thing that I didn’t then.”

Alcina raised her own eyebrow. “Hmm, is that so?” She asked, a growl emitting from her. “Daughters, don’t you have anything better to do? I’m sure Y/N appreciates you helping her get ready, but your help is no longer required.”

Cassandra leaned forward to whisper in your ear. “I told you. Can’t even spend time with you without her getting jealous.” Cassandra cleared her throat. “We simply wished to keep Y/N company as you got ready, Mother.”

Daniela wrapped her arm around your waist as the four of you descended the stairs. “You wouldn’t deny us that honour, would you, Mother?” Daniela asked, a faux innocence lacing her tone.

You wrapped your own arm around Daniela’s waist, but Bela  spoke before you could. “We’ll be on our best behaviour, Mother.” Bela shot a glance at Daniela who grinned as she tightened her hold on you.

Alcina’s eyes turned a little darker at the sight of you and Daniela holding each other. It took everything in her not to reprimand her daughters right then and there. “I will be right down.” She said before she stomped past the four of you.

“You three are in so much trouble with her.” You couldn’t help the small smile that graced your face. “When did you three get start getting so bold with your mother?”

Daniela pulled you into her lap as she sat down on the couch, her sisters on either side of her. “It’s not fair how she treats us when it comes to you.” Daniela said as she pulled you against her, her clasped hands settling just below your chest.

“Dani’s right, Mother really doesn’t like the attention we give you.” Cassandra said as she ran her hand up and down your arm, you shivered at her touch and Daniela’s grip tightened slightly.

Bela fussed over your hair slightly as she spoke. “We really do enjoy spending time with you even if it’s just once a week. If you weren’t off limits…” Her sentence trailed off into mumbling, but you knew what she was hinting at.

Daniela’s hands had now settled on your thighs causing your breath to hitch. “Daniela,” Your voice had a slight warning to it and she chuckled against your neck.

“Don’t worry, Y/N, Mother’s still in her chambers.” Daniela replied as she caressed your thighs. You nodded against her. She was right, you hadn’t felt the air in the room change with the presence of the Countess.

“Do be careful with your hands, Dani. Mother will smell you all over her precious pet.” Bela said. She shot a quick glance to the staircase to make sure that her Mother hadn’t, in fact, come downstairs and was relieved that she hadn’t.

Cassandra pressed a kiss to your cheek. “You know, if you ever get tired of Mother’s possessiveness over you, we’d be more than happy to share you.”

“You three…. How would you explain to your Mother if she caught you flirting shamelessly with me?” You asked. You took Daniela’s hands in yours before sighing. “Ever since we left the room, you have all just turned into flirts. Are you all mad?”

The three of them laughed at your question. Bela pressed a kiss to your other cheek and Daniela kissed the back of your neck and you stifled a whimper. You didn’t mind the attention from them, it was more than you’d gotten from their Mother in the past month. So without much thought you brought Daniela’s hands over your breasts as Cassandra and Bela took over caressing your thighs and teasing you as they pressed kisses along your jaw. You could feel yourself heating up as Daniela played with your breasts and this time you didn’t stifle the small moan that you released.

“Daughters, if you do anything more, the consequences will be dire.” The Countess’ voice caused you to jump up from Daniela’s lap, smoothing out your dress as your eyes caught hers.

“We were just trying to calm her down, Mother. She was quite nervous about the trip to Lord Moreau’s.” Daniela explained. Cassandra and Bela nodded their heads in agreement while you continued to try and getting your breathing under control.

Something dangerous flashed in Alcina’s eyes. “Go.” Was all she said to the three girls before they dispersed into blowflies, leaving you alone with their Mother. You gulped as she walked towards you. The crimson red of the dressed worked well with the paleness of her skin, and the slit up the left leg. The snarl on her face turned into a smug grin as she saw you eyeing her. “See something you like?”

You nodded your head slowly, not taking your eyes off of her own. “You look ravishing, My Lady.” You replied. “Shall we go?” You asked, finally breaking eye contact with her as she came to stand in front of you.

Her fingers curled under your chin, guiding your head upwards to look at her. “Just one moment, darling. I have something that I need to take care of.” You gulped again as her other hand came up to caress your cheek. Alcina guided you over to a chair and positioned you in her lap, much like the way Daniela did except her hand wrapped around your neck. “You were a bad girl while Mommy was away, weren’t you?” You tried to nod in reply, but her grip tightened.

“Yes, Mommy, I was a bad girl. I’m sorry.” You choked out against her grip.

Alcina pressed her nose into the side of your neck, taking in your scent. Her free hand travelled down your body until she reached the end of your dress, slipping her hand underneath. Alcina pressed a kiss to your neck as she pushed one of her fingers into you causing you to moan. “Call me selfish, but I don’t ever want anyone else to touch you. You’re mine.” She mumbled into your neck before she added another finger.

“Yes, I’m yours, all yours. Mommy, please.” You whimpered as you grind yourself down against her fingers, meeting her thrust for thrust. You could feel yourself getting close. “Please. I’ll be such a good girl for you, Mommy. I promise.” You whimpered again.

Alcina growled into your neck. “I simply don’t believe you after how I found you with my daughters, pet.” She nibbled the skin of your neck. Her thumb swiped over your clit a few times before she pulled her hand away from you, leaving you whining at the loss of contact. “Bad girls don’t get the pleasure of coming.” She said as she pushed her fingers into your mouth. You grabbed her wrist as you licked yourself clean from her gloved hand.

Alcina pushed you off of her as she stood up to discard her glove and replace it. “Let's ,ove along, darling. We’ll be late if we don’t hurry.” Alcina called over her shoulder as she headed out the front door.

You quickly followed after her, sitting on the seat opposite of her in the carriage. The ride to Lord Moreau’s manor was torturous. You could feel your own arousal coating your thighs as you rubbed them together to relieve some of the aching. Alcina paid you no attention until the carriage stopped and she helped you out.

“Stop fidgeting. And if you’re good, Mommy has a reward for you.” She said when she bent down to be eye level with you. “Try to mingle, but not too much. If I so much as-“

You cut her off. “You won’t, My Lady, you have my word.” You stammered out. You gave her a small smile and she took your hand in hers, heading into the theatre. The theatre was quite lively. You didn’t know most of the people there, but you recognised Lord Heisenberg and Lady Benevento with her doll, Angie. “Can I go say hi?” You asked. Alcina let out a deep sigh before she waved you off.

“What’s got her so uptight tonight?” Heisenberg asked.

You frowned. “Her daughters.” You replied. “They, I let them… to-“ Heisenberg decided that he didn’t want to hear the rest of that sentence and cut you off.

“Too much information, sorry I asked.” Heisenberg said before he walked away.

You sighed. “Good evening, Lady Beneviento. How are you and Angie?” You asked the veiled woman in front of you.

“Donna and I are doing just fine, Y/N! So you let Alci’s girls touch you? Aren’t you supposed to be loyal to her?” Angie asked.

You nodded your head. “It was an accident. I didn’t mean to, she wasn’t supposed to see.” You bit your lip at your words. She wasn’t supposed to see? “I’m sorry. I should go find Alcina.” You said quickly before turning on your heel.

You found the tall woman quite quickly; it was getting to her that was the problem. You said a multitude of excuse me’s as you pushed through the crowd. As you got close to her, someone grabbed your hand. “Excuse me, please let me go.” You said as you tugged on your hand.

“Now, now, what the Lady doesn’t see, she won’t mind.” The man said as he led you away from the crowd. You tried to pull away from him and was surprised that no one took notice of your struggle. “Stop squirming.”

“I believe she asked you to let her go.” The man dropped your hand you scurried behind the Lady. “It’s very disrespectful to go about touching things that aren’t yours. If I see your face again, you’ll regret it severely.” Her threat to the man made you flush. Her possessiveness was quite a turn on for you so when you heard her sniff and saw her eyes turn a darker shade as they did earlier, you let her lead you the way that man was going to into a vacant room.

Alcina closed the door and set you down on a lounge in the room. Her face was invading your personal space as she spoke to you. “Did he hurt you, pet?” You stared at her as your chest heaved. She growled when you didn’t reply and grabbed at the back of your head. “I asked you a question, pet. Remember, bad girls don’t get rewarded.”

You gulped before you shook your head. “No, My Lady, he didn’t hurt me.” You replied as your eyes flickered from her lips and back to her eyes.

Alcina caressed your cheek as she eased her grip on you. “Is Mommy’s pet still worked up?” She cooed at you and you nodded your head. “Mommy’s sorry she let you out of her sight, when I saw that filthy man-thing with his hands on you…” Her sentence trailed off and you took that as an opportunity to bring your lips forward to meet hers.

“Please fuck me, Mommy.” You mumbled against her lips.

“Of course, pet.” Alcina bunched your dress up around your waist as she trailed kisses down your jaw and to your neck. “Be a good girl for Mommy and keep your voice down.” You nodded, moaning quietly when you felt her hand trail up your thigh. Her free hand reached around to your back to undo the laces on your corset. When it was loosened enough, she pulled the top of your dress down to expose your breast to the cool air in the room. “So beautiful.” Alcina murmured to herself as she pressed a kiss to your chest.

“Mommy, please.” You whined. Alcina chuckled as she continued to tease you, her fingers toying with your entrance as her thumb circled lightly over your clit. You bit your lip to stifle a moan as she slipped two of her fingers inside of you. The way her fingers stretched you bordered on painful, but it was also pleasurable. As you did earlier, you grind down against her fingers, wanting to take them as deep as you could.

Alcina took one of your nipples into her mouth, her tongue swirling around it before she let it go, blowing at it. The small whimper you made caused her to grin. Her free hand had been toying with your other nipple, kneading the flesh of your breast as she continued to fuck you. You let your eyes slip closed, surprised when Alcina’s pace didn’t slacken at your lack of eye contact. You felt her hand leave your breast and make its way to cheek, her thumb running over the swell of your bottom lip as her kisses trailed back up to your neck.

“Look at me, pet.” She breathed against your ear and you opened your eyes. She’d moved away from your ear and was staring at you through half lidded eyes. You felt her fingers stopped and whined. “None of that, dear.” Alcina said as she slipped her fingers out of you. She helped you sit up and she got on her knees, even in this position she was slightly taller than you. “You’re doing so well for me, pet.”

You watched as she pulled your lower half closer to the edge of the lounge, watching as she breathed in your scent and she licked her lips. Your hands instantly found their way to her hair as she guided herself toward your center and pressed her tongue to your wetness. Your grip on her hair tightened as you pressed her closer to you. The flat of her tongue ran up to your clit, she sucked on it hard causing you to arch your back. Her hand was back at your folds and pressing into your folds, you couldn’t help the slightly loud moan that you let escape your mouth.

Your hands had moved from her hair to cover your face. Alcina was endlessly teasing you, bringing you to the edge as her fingers plunged in and out of you. “Alcina, please, I can’t do this anymore.” You felt tears running down your cheeks as you pleaded with her a bit.

Alcina mumbled something against you before she removed her face from your center. She repositioned you slightly so her fingers would hit at just the right angle. She smirked when you let out a gasp at the change in position and pace.

“Tell me you’re mine.” She said softly as she ran her thumb over your wet cheek.

“I’m yours, My Lady, all yours.” You replied as you sloppily met her fingers with every thrust. You wrapped your arms around her neck and pulled her lips to yours. You let out a loud moan into her mouth as your orgasm washed over you.

When your high ended, Alcina stood up and you panted trying to catch your breath as you looked up at her. A smug grin was on her face as she took in the sight of how you looked. “You know, I think you forgot to lock the door, that means anyone could walk right in and see you like this.” Alcina said teasingly, gesturing to how dishevelled you looked.

You frowned at her slightly while she looked in a nearby mirror to straighten herself up. She used the end of her now soiled gloved to wipe off any of your arousal that remained on her face before she reapplied her lipstick that she tucked away in a small purse. You noticed her pull out another glove from her purse and pull it on. How many replacement gloves did she have?

Alcina took one last glance at herself before turning to you. “Clean yourself up, pet. Lord Moreau hates it when his guests miss any parts of his plays after the party is over.” Alcina said before walking out of the room, the door clicking closed as she left.

[tenthgrove]

Soft Yandere Tizano and squalo

Yandere La Unita

Content Warnings: yandere behaviour, manipulation, abduction, forced dependency, violence, unhealthy relationships, the general existence of Dolcio Cioccolata.

Squalo and Tiziano

It isn't common for Squalo and Tiziano to interact with civilians. Or anyone really, since the pair are largely content with each other's company and nothing more. The sole exception to this is the necessary interactions that result from their frequent shopping trips, from which you, the cashier of their favourite boutique, came into play.

The pair observed you innocuously for many months, slowly learning practically everything that could be known about you simply from overheard conversations with colleagues. You dare say you liked them, even, as they were friendlier than your average customer and a familiar face to look forward too.

One day, Squalo sits Tiziano down and admits his attraction to you. It was meant to be an honourable confession, an honest admittance of wrongdoing to ensure no harm comes to the relationship. To Squalo's shock, Tiziano chuckles and announces he feels the same way. It's time the couple started to pursue you actively.

The defining feature of how Squalo and Tiziano obtain you is that it's calculated and smart. Squalo's happy to just walk up to you and ask for you to be together (or barring that, just abduct you), but it is Tiziano who convinces him otherwise. Not only would conventional methods of wooing you be unlikely to work, but they have practical concerns to worry about as well, being high-ranking members of the mafia. They're going to have to plan something a little more nuanced.

During a visit to your store, Squalo slips a little bit of paper into your pocket. You open it at home that evening to find your own address, along with several belonging to your closest friends and family listed out, above a message instructing you to come to a location of their choice the next day or they'll start paying these people visits. It's an outdoor restaurant in the middle of the city, where there's bound to be a lot of people. They don't want to scare you too much after all.

You arrive at the restaurant the next day on weak knees. Squalo and Tiziano thank you for coming, before introducing themselves in no uncertain terms as mafiosos who have taken an interest in you, and would like to start dating. You read between the lines that you don't have an option to say no.

However, the pair make clear the incentives to accept their offer are just as profound as the threats against refusing it. Are you in education? They're happy to support you in continuing it. Do you work? They have more than enough money to support you in reducing your hours or, if it's something you genuinely enjoy, bribing the right people to advance your career. Ultimately, Squalo and Tiziano know the carrot is just as important as the stick.

Thought you aren't forced to go home with them there and then, it soon becomes clear you're expected to sort your affairs quickly and move in within the next couple of months. From that point on, the couple will treat you as though you've been together for years, expecting you to address them as your partners as well.

Both Squalo and Tiziano are very touchy in their own ways, and while they would never force themselves on you, are more than happy to trail their hands up and down your arms early on. They are also both incredibly teasing, and will pick up on all your reactions.

The good news is that the level of freedom afforded to you is high from the get-go. Even from the beginning, you're allowed to maintain control of your finances and go out by yourself provided you tell them. Just be warned they'll occasionally check in on you by surprise to make sure you're actually where you said you would go. The one thing they do quite heavily police is social visits. The possibility of you revealing to someone they forced you to be with them is very acute, not that you would get very far if you did try to run away. It's not that you can't have friends, you just need to be very honest about who you're meeting and why.

Cioccolata and Secco

If Dolcio Cioccolata has taken an interest in you and his intentions aren't torture or murder, it can only mean one thing- you are someone very dear to him, and have been so for a long time. Chances are, you probably trust him a lot back. Cioccolata's gotten very good at acting normal around his respectable friends, after all.

The two main possibilities are that you know him as a family friend and became close through parties, or you're a chronically ill patient who found yourself in his care, and were lucky enough to avoid his scalpel long enough for a genuine mutual bond to form. It could be both. You could have fallen ill after knowing him for a long time. He could have made you ill.

As for Secco, Cioccolata will only pursue you as a lover with his consent. Cioccolata would never want his darling pet to feel neglected, after all, and for that reason it's only when Secco confesses a fondness for you that Cioccolata decides its time to make you his own. Secco is immediately very excited at the thought of you joining them, and for a while Cioccolata's main concern is actually stopping him from giving their plans away.

As much as Cioccolata would love to pluck you from your home, he knows that would only get him caught. The police are already after a serial killer with surgical knowledge, and taking you like that would just make him a suspect. So he does something more covert, he invites you over. You enjoy a lovely night gorging snacks and watching TV with your two friends, until Cioccolata invites you to the basement. As you go down, he snatches your phone and sends out the first of many messages designed to trick your family into thinking you've run away.

Waiting for you there in the basement, to your horror, is a functional operating theatre, complete with spatter after spatter of blood. You'll probably try to run, but the door is already locked. But don't worry, your blood won't be joining that on the table tonight. As Cioccolata explains to you as you cower in the corner, he treasures your bond very much, the tender feeling of what they call 'romance' that fills his heart whenever you look at him, the obscure sense of care for another human being. He won't be subjecting you to his operations.

That is, until your inevitable first attempt at escape. Although he'll still stop short of outright torturing you (providing a generous dose of general anaesthetic and subsequent painkillers) his 'alterations' to your limbs will lead you unable to walk or carry out fine motor skills. You'll be entirely dependent on his and Secco's care. As he assures you frequently, the changes are entirely reversible and you can have all your old mobility back with another operation and a little physical therapy, but for Cioccolata to give that to you, you're going to have to earn it.

Cioccolata keeps his promise to reverse the damage he did to you, but by the time that happens a lot has changed. He hasn't conditioned you to become like Secco as that would involve removing everything that first endeared him to you, but you're still going to have to become a lot more warmed up to him to trust you with your limbs back. At least you'll be treated like royalty in the meantime, even if you are still a prisoner. Cioccolata will remind you every day you're his darling pet, just like Secco.

Doppio

Doppio was never allowed to have lovers when the Boss was around. He found it a little hypocritical since the boss once told him he had a girlfriend, but he guessed he understood his reasoning and, either way, he would never question his boss. The boss is gone now, and Doppio has nobody to guide him anymore. He's alone and doesn't know what to do; even the old hideouts the new boss never found feel cold and empty, and Doppio can't bring himself to enter them. Then he met you.

You weren't quite sure what you were looking at, seeing a fine-dressed, disoriented boy stumbling around in the rain outside your window. Nonetheless, you knew he was in no state to be alone so you went out and approached him. When it was clear he had nobody to call, you invited him in.

As you leave him alone in the sitting room to make coffee, Doppio's mind is going in cartwheels. You've been so kind to him, and deep down in his heart something tells him the two of you were meant for each other. This could be his new start! Someone to rely on, to depend upon to give him purpose! But wait- if he leaves tonight he might never see you again! As he panics, Doppio decides he can't let that happen. He needs to have you tonight.

The second you return to the sitting room, Doppio pounces on you. As he frantically assures you that everything's going to be okay, you pass out from shock. You wake up in a strange house, tied to an extravagant bed. Your screams bring Doppio to your room. He quickly reassures you he isn't going to hurt you and is doing this so you can be together.

Doppio has some (i.e, a few million quid) money he was able to salvage from before the boss' fall, and he's going to use it however possible to please you. He will buy you anything and everything you desire short of freedom, making his own guesses about what you'd like if you refuse to talk.

His initial plan is to keep you locked up in that room (or at very least the wider house) forever, since it's safest for you and his old boss never went out much, but eventually he relents at your distress. He'll let you out eventually, if that's what it takes to make you smile.

On that note, the best thing about being Doppio's darling is how easy it is to turn the tables on him. Once you've behaved yourself for a while, having learned what keeps Doppio satisfied, it's very easy to become the dominant one in the relationship and make him let you do whatever you want. His sole desire is to serve you, after all.

[biwindblade]

i only trust u w this question so WHAT are your top kanera songs. no limit whatsoever

oh my gosh this may just be the greatest ask i’ve ever gotten. for starters, here’s the link to my actual kanera playlist that is my absolute pride and joy <3

1. ALL THE STARS by KENDRICK LAMAR & SZA

this is the first track on their playlist and for a GOOD reason. the lyrics in this just work so well. ludwig’s score & the strings in the background also sell that old & new / past & present vibe that kanan and hera both have.

love, let’s talk about love / is it anything and everything you hoped for? / or do the feeling haunt you? / i know the feeling haunt you

+ what goes together better than loving & haunting & kanera? the answer is nothing. they perfected it.

2. IT GETS BETTER by REX ORANGE COUNTY

this one of my favourite lovey dovey songs because it’s written so personally?? it’s talking about a real love & one that makes you in the process a better person and i don’t really think that could fit them any better. kanan just loves her, okay?

she changed the world, i know / and it’s better for it / four years later, and look where we really are / look how far we’ve come / look at us now

+ special points bc it mentions flying too (we’re flying i finally know / I’m here for a reason) & like????

3. LETS GET MARRIED by BLEACHERS

legally i had to put this song bc they’re space married. it’s just so happy???? and honestly, that’s what they deserve and i refuse to believe anything else. i am still on the first stage of grief.

cause we don’t wanna walk alone / or run away / change me at all costs / starlight and star-crossed / take me so breathless / we could be reckless

+ also the line it’s hard enough to love me???? that’s them. no further explanation needed your honour.

4. ¡QUE BONITO! by ROSARIO

so this song is very near & dear to me because latino kanera rights. also the lyrics just about undo me. this is the english translation but the song is in espanõl tho.

that my body doesn't stop noticing / that your soul is always with me / and that, from me, it will never depart

+ it also mentions flying too (how beautiful it would be to be able to fly / and next to you) like hello pilot and her co-pilot who’d follow her anywhere !!!!!!!!

5. COOL ON FIRE by DANIEL JOHNS

this one very much gives me the vibes about them being separated for most of the time from the end of s2 and throughout a lot of s3. like being so in love and having to like. put it to the side out of duty both to kanan’s teachings and hera’s duty to the rebellion.

i get higher / you keep getting better and i’m trying / but i can’t see nothing else / cause together, nothing matters / we’re on fire / cool on fire

+ we love fire symbolism & hera as the cool & kanan as the fire is uh. que rico.

6. IT ONLY TAKES A MOMENT by MICHAEL CRAWFORD & MARIANNE MCANDREW

i like to think about this song as like, right after their first kiss maybe or just like reminiscing about it. idk. it just fits. trust me. i had to put one overly romantic musical theatre song on here so uh. here it is.

and that is all that loves about / and we’ll recall when time runs out / that it only took a moment / to be loved / a whole lifelong

+ to think, it is a love that went beyond one lifetime. i am going to breakdown and cry now.

7. THE MOMENT I SAID IT by IMOGEN HEAP

so, it’s them so i had to add one sad song. this is very much the j*di n*ght song. like kanan KNEW. he KNEW what was going to happen and i personally think hera will think about that for as long as she lives, even when it’s all been forgiven and accepted.

but darling, you’re not thinking straight / suddenly things just happened, we can’t explain / it’s not even light out / but you’ve got somewhere to be / no hesitation, no / i’ve never seen you like this

+ thank u imogen heap for understanding emotions and making it into music so brilliantly. i am hurting.

seven songs for their little crew of seven. hope u like them and my past midnight absolute wild explanations <3

[gimme-my-mammoney]

Obey Me! Brothers Imagines #2 - Watching a horror movie together at the cinema.

This hasn’t been proofread yet, so I apologise if there are any mistakes! I promise I won’t open all my imagines like this... maybe. 

- Asks and requests are open - 

Your favourite actor is starring in a new film and you just HAVE to see it. The only problem is that it’s a horror movie and you are definitely not a horror fan. You're also definitely not going alone. If only you knew a strong demon boy to take with you... 

Lucifer ~

Tried to show no reaction when you asked him to come with you, in fact, he suggested you go alone. Too proud to show you how excited he was that you wanted to spend time with him. 

Only agreed when you confessed you were too scared to go alone. Would rather sit through something he hated than have you frightened. 

Insists on buying both the tickets; it’s the gentlemanly thing to do. 

To thank him for the tickets and for coming, you try to buy two boxes of popcorn but he insists that it’s cheaper to just get one giant one and share. 

You both reach for the popcorn during the trailers and your hands brush together. He blushes and insists you go first. You’re both watching each other out of the corner of your eyes nervously until the film starts.

He chuckles at the scary/ gory parts. He only stops when he sees you cowering behind the popcorn.

He reaches out and holds your hand to let you know that he’s there. 

Once the film is done you agree to walk home together. You link his arm and stay close to him for protection. He notices but never shames you for it. He walks you right to your bedroom door. 

Before he leaves you for the night he reminds you that you live with seven of the most powerful demons in the Devildom and promises that you’re safe. 

Whenever he’s pestered for information about your cinema trip by the other brothers he never mentions your fear and threatens to string them up by their feet for being nosey. 

Mammon ~ 

Pretended like he’d already seen the movie to avoid having to go watch it. 

Only agreed to go when you casually suggested you’d ask one of his brothers instead. 

You’ll have to buy both tickets because he used the last of his money up trying to set up a pyramid scheme. You don’t mind, though, it was you who wanted to see the movie. 

He’ll also make you buy the snacks and drinks. He won’t accept just anything, either. He wants the deluxe combo that comes with a cup you can keep. 

Spends the trailers saying; ‘we should go see that’, with a mouthful of popcorn. Would be gross if he wasn’t so cute.

As the film is about to start he tells you that the GREAT Mammon isn’t going to look after you if you get scared, you’ve got to take care of yourself. 

The film starts and Mammon slides down into his chair. 

He wails at every jump scare and then blushes when he realises you’ve noticed. 

You have to take charge and grab his hand. 

When he still doesn’t calm down you suggest that you ditch the rest of the film. He teases you for being a ‘baby’ and not wanting to see it through but practically sprints out of the theatre. 

When you get home he walks you to your bedroom, teasing you the whole way there. Before he leaves, he tells you that he was only pretending to be scared so that you didn’t feel stupid. 

He lets you keep the cup from his deluxe combo. 

He still lingers in your room until you suggest a sleepover, he agrees, seeing as you’re the one who’s so scared and needs the protection of the GREAT Mammon. You end up watching cartoons all night until you both fall asleep. 

He takes great pride in telling everyone how much of a baby YOU were and how he wanted to watch the film to the end but you were too frightened. You decide to let him have his moment, you could always force him to watch another scary film as punishment. 

Leviathan ~

Of course he will go and watch it with you! He’s a HUGE fan of the actor too.

He spends the run-up to the premier on message boards and blogs trying to find out everything he can. He won’t stop spamming you with links to interviews and random factoids he’s found in his internet trawl.

You each buy your own ticket and snacks. He wants to keep the ticket stub for his collection of memorabilia. He gets the deluxe combo purely for the reusable drinks cup. 

Spends the trailers chatting at you about the film/ any trailer that happens to catch his interest. It’s nice for you to see him so excited about something that you’re doing together.

He’ll enjoy the film and forget you’re with him because he gets so engrossed. He’ll only notice you’re terrified when you let out a small squeal. 

He’ll spend the rest of the film explaining how they used special effects to create the monster and the gore to convince you that it isn’t real. He’ll also look for plot holes so that you remember it’s just a movie. 

He’ll tell you that the movie was garbage (even though he liked it) just so that you don’t feel stupid about not enjoying it. 

He’ll never tell a soul that you were scared and when asked will just say the night was ‘fine’ with a shrug. You trust Levi more after that, now that it’s clear he won’t try to shame you.

Satan ~

Why would you want to see that movie, It’s not a book adaption?

Will laugh at you when you admit that you’re too scared to go alone. How can you be scared? You live with seven demons. 

He’ll agree to go if you promise to read one of his favourite books after. 

He’ll buy both tickets when he sees how important this is to you. He’ll claim it was easier to just get the two tickets but the blush in his cheeks lets you know that it’s because he cares about you. 

Will spend the trailers talking about your favourite actor, it’s apparent he’s done some research. He blushes when you ask him about it and denies it, though. It must just be something he heard about in passing. 

He rolls his eyes when you jump or squeal during the film. Regardless, he puts his arm over your shoulder and pulls you closer. You don’t need to look at his face to know he’s a pretty shade of pink right now. 

Will walk you home with his arm still around your shoulders. He doesn’t want to let you go and you’re glad for the protection. Before he leaves you for the night he’ll make sure you’re okay before clarifying; ‘you know it’s not real, right?’

Whenever anyone asks if you got scared during the movie he’ll just glare at them over the top of his book until they back... away... slowly. 

Asmodeus ~

He will totally go with you because that actor is soooo handsome. 

Spends more time picking an outfit for the evening than he does getting hyped for the movie.

Spends the trailers talking about how he could be a movie star because he’s beautiful enough. He makes you laugh a lot and doesn’t mind that you’re giggling at his expense because the sound is so pretty. 

Spends the film waiting for an NSFW scene and is disappointed when there isn’t one. 

Notices you’re frightened and gives you the tightest hug. ‘Don’t worry! You’ve got someone as beautiful as me here to keep you safe!’. He gives you a reassuring smile and you manage to actually relax and watch the film. His commentary about how hot each actor is and how far fetched their acting is makes you laugh. 

He lends you his noise machine for the night so that you’re not stressed or scared because that’s bad for your skin. He offers to sleep in your bed too but you’re not sure how honourable that offer is. 

When he’s asked about the night he gushes about the actors and never tells anyone how scared you were. You heard him call the night ‘wonderful!’ to Lucifer once. 

Beelzebub ~

You don’t even get to finish telling him what film you want to see before he agrees. The cinema = popcorn. He’s in.

Orders so much food that you have to have three tickets because he needs a ‘snack chair’. 

Spends the trailers munching his way through his snacks and has to duck out before the film starts to get more. When he comes back in, the film has started. He notices that you’ve taken his jacket off of his chair and are hiding behind it. 

After the third time you squeal, he pulls you out of your seat and onto his lap. He wraps his arms around you and lays his head on your shoulder. He never says anything, even when you turn to bury your head in his neck. He just holds you. 

His stomach rumbles and makes you jump. He blushes and apologises. You spend the rest of the movie feeding him his snacks and watching his face. 

The walk home isn’t scary when you’re with him. Especially seeing as you’re still wrapped in his jacket. 

He walks you to your bedroom and lets you keep his jacket for the night so that you don’t feel as scared. When he notices you getting nervous again he decides to sleep on the floor and hold your hand all night - like you once did for him. You convince him to sleep in your bed instead and you drift off easily. It's hard not to feel safe when you have Beel the BFG protecting you.

Belphegor ~ 

Agrees to go because the cinema is dark and that means naps. 

Almost misses the film because he overslept. 

Falls asleep in the trailers and doesn’t wake up until halfway through the film, when your screech of terror wakes him up. 

He sees you shaking and covers you with his blanket. You both pull it up over your heads and have a nap instead. 

Once you’re discovered and promptly kicked out by the cinema staff, you take a cab home because you’re too tired to walk. 

Once you’re home you quickly make a pillow fort out of the sofa to sleep in. It was his idea. 

You somehow manage to sleep soundlessly thanks to the soft, rhythmic sighing he makes while he sleeps. 

[fandomlifechoseme]

hi! i i was wondering if you could write a damian wayne x reader where they are soulmates and he rejects her at first but dick finds out and fluff ensues

Hell yeah you can!

It was a fun day at school. All of the theatre kids put on a play while the sports kids played sports I guess, I spent the entire time chilling by myself. It was how I liked it. I spent the entire day drawing which obviously felt like heaven that was until he came around. Damian showed up in the art room I know he like to draw as well so I didn’t say anything against it. But then when I slightly got bored I decided to draw on my arm. I drew a little rose that Grew into a tree I thought it looks nice personally. When I looked up though, Damien was watching me with this disgusted look on as I obviously I thought he was just judging me because I was writing on my own. But then I looked onto his arm and they’re sat the exact same drawings. Shit. I wanted to talk to him about it but he just stood up and ran. Rude. Every day I saw him in the art room and I tried and tried and tried to talk to him. He never even let me get a single word in. One day I cornered him in the art room

“ we need to talk”

“ about what tch”

I quickly picked up my pencil and draw little smile on my wrist. It appeared on his quickly.

“That”

“Honestly I don’t want to be your soulmate either. but we need to talk about it”

He stood up from where he was sitting and gave me the most terrifying glare I have ever seen.

“ you don’t get it though, I’m never going to fall in love with a loser like you. You can’t be my soulmate because my soulmate would actually be good at something not mediocre at drawing”

He then marched out of The art room, leaving me there to just sit in sorrow. How can anyone be that rude. Let alone someone who I’m supposed to fall in love with and someone who I’m supposed to spend the rest my life with. I decided then and there that I would never conform to society is ideal soulmate. I didn’t need someone to be happy. Especially someone who makes me feel like shit. Months go by And every time I see Damien in the hallways I just give him a scoff. I just hope one day he’ll feel as bad as how I felt in that moment. no one in their right mind to get to treat someone like that and get away with it.

Art class was hard because Damian was in my class and Miss worked out they were trouble is between us. She took it upon herself to “fix” us. One day she decided that she would start a project. You had to paint someone you admired. And it was in pairs. So obviously she paired me with the asshole.

“ Who inspires that cold dead heart of yours?” Harsh. I know. But my parents had raised me to believe your soulmate is someone who makes you feel happy and get here. If it none of those boxes harsh. I know. But my parents had raised me to believe your soulmate is someone who makes you feel happy and giddy. Damian fit none of those boxes.

“my heart is very much beating, thank you and I guess Robin.”

Blah!

“Yeah I guess, I definitely prefer Nightwing though, oh! but Red Robin is awesome!” His face goes to pure disgust at the mention of Red Robin.

“Drake would never let me forget it. I’d rather do Nightwing”

At least we came to an agreement? Yano he’s not that ba-

“ oh and stop with the drawing on yourself. I don’t need that on me”

Nope. I take it back he is a 10/10 butthole. I take out my pen and start drawing red robin all over my arms.

“ fine, keep drawing. Just no Red Robin.” I can make this arrangement work out. Missed calls out to everyone, that we have five minutes and it would be best if we work a bit at home.

“My house or yours?”

“Tch, my Manor. obviously”

TIME SKIPPY!

After school ended I started heading over to where Damian was waiting. He offered me a ride begrudgingly. To which I accepted. I expected to be riding home in a simple car. But I did not expect a freaking limo. We get into the car and Damian calls to the driver.

“Pennyworth! This is my partner I was telling you about, We will be working on our project at the home today” pennyworth? That’s a weird name. Maybe it’s his last name.

“ good evening Miss/Mr L/N my name is Alfred pennyworth. You may call me Alfred” I gave Alfred a small smile and thank him for the ride.

“You can you call me Y/N!” We went through most of the ride in complete silence. The only noise was the rare chatter between Alfred and Damian. When we pulled up to Damian’s house immediately recognised it as the Wayne Manor! I forgot he was a Wayne sometimes. He just acts so different to his father. We walk up to the door and hear gunshots. Obviously this scares me a little bit so I asked Damian what it was.

“That’s just Todd. You don’t need to be afraid of him” He says in a comforting voice? When we open the door I recognised Dick Grayson immediately. He may or may not of been my childhood crush, you’ll never know.

“ Grayson. This is my partner L/N. We will be working on a project from 4 to 8 pm. I expect no disturbances throughout this period of time.”Oh so he’s like that at home as well. Dick Grayson turns to me.

“Hi! And what is your name?”

“Y/n! I didn’t know you’d be here!” Out Walks Tim Drake. A distant friend of a friend.

“ honestly, I didn’t even know I’d be here until period four. It’s nice to see you Tim”

Tim then sees my arm Which still is covered with Red Robin

“ you are a fan of Red Robin?” He had an unnatural smile on. Like it looked like pure amusement mixed with doubt and a hint of sleep deprivation.

“Ye-“ before I could finish the sentence Damian grabs my arm and starts leading me to his room I think. Or the art room.

Dick’s POV

I noticed it when Damian grabbed their arm. I noticed the red robin drawn all over his arm too. Oh man. That explains when he came home awkward and semi Upset. I know he has a crush on them maybe they doesn’t have a crush on him. He would come home every day and just talk non-stop about them. Then one day he just stopped. He said at the start of that day that he would finally talk to them. And yet nothing happened. I turned to Tim to ask him

“Did you see what was on his arm?”

“Obviously, how could I ever miss this opportunity. He has red robin written all over his arm and drawn. I’m gonna have to thank Y/n”. After smacking him lightly. I go and try to find out what happened from Alfred. Tim goes back to his lair And does whatever he does when he’s hiding. I had to convince Jason to stop shooting so that Y/N would not think we are under attack. After a lot of digging and talking to everyone including Bruce and my lovely Barbara. I found out what happened. As the great big brother I am I had to get involved. I made a few calls and within minutes I had everything I needed.

“Damian! Y/n! Come downstairs we’re gonna watch a movie!” Obviously I picked out the most romantic movie we owned. It wasn’t really romantic but was the best thing we had.

“Grayson! We are working on the project! We are not watching a movie.” Okay time for plan b. I quickly run up the stairs and slam open the door. It turns out they were doing more than making a project. They were making a painting of me. There’s nothing more romantic than painting me. Well I think I still need to help out a bit. So I leave the movie there for them and ask if Y/N wanted to stay the night.

“I can’t, sorry, my mother would never agree.”

Y/n’s pov

I didn’t want to stay over because, my mother is a murderous people who does not like the idea of staying over boys house and I guess that’s the only reason. I mean Damien‘s bad but we have great conversations. Like before Dick came in we were having a fun conversation about why we admired night wing. Dick looked sad but he left.

“ anyway. Why do you not like Robin?”

“It’s not like I don’t like Robin. I just think he’s just a bit scary you know?” He nods.

“ why do you not like red robin?” This lit a fire in his eyes.

“ where do I get started. First of all he is incompetent, he thinks he’s great but he’s very shit.”

“Reminds me of you”

“ do not compare us”

“ or what?” He just laughs and as he was about to answer. Dick kicks open the door and starts talking about how he convinced my mother to let me stay over. I mean He probably could convince anyone anything. If he came up to me one day and said that the joker was actually Batman I’d immediately believe him.

I agree to stay over. And as I turned around I heard the door slam shut again. Sounds like dick had left. Damian looks at me with a sincere look.

“I want to apologise. I panicked and in the heat of the moment I said things I didn’t mean. One. I’d be honoured if you are my soulmate. Two. I don’t think your mediocre at drawing.”

Can’t say I expected that. But I don’t think he expected though was for me to forgive him.

“ Damian. I really like you and I think we could definitely work out as soulmates. If you are willing to try?” He smiles. this is the first time I’ve ever seen them smile and we have been in class together for almost 3 years.

“ can I, can I kiss you?”

I nod and lean into the kiss. Before our lips could touch though. Loud gunshots rock through the building again.

“Dam Todd.”

“ so I take it that the Waynes aren’t a normal family?”

“Nope” Tim says falling out of the ceiling.

[film-clown]

IT Chapter 2

After endlessly mourning over IT Chapter 2, I’m ready to talk about it.

Obviously, spoiler alert. Major ones.

SO. I’m speechless. Like, I’m ready to talk about it but I can’t even form words because.. wow.

I’m gonna start off by saying that this wasn’t even a horror movie. 2-3 jump-scares, plus the woman with the hanging tits that tried to scare Beverly. That shit wasn’t even horror - it was COMEDY. And if they thought that making Ben see Beverly’s hair on fire while she yelled “YOUR HAIR IS WINTER FIRE”, wasn’t gonna make me laugh? They were wrong. They were extremely wrong, I was laughing way too hard in the theatre and I felt horrible considering what Pennywise/Beverly made Ben hear from her right before. Shit made me sad, but goddamn.

This was a coming-of-age film. That’s all I will categorise it as, because that’s what it deserves to be called. No way was this horror. The scenes where they transitioned from being adults to kids or vice versa, and the numerous flashbacks, all of it was emotional as hell. Nostalgic, intimate, the way I felt watching these scenes as a teenager, scared of what the future holds and not ready to let go of my childhood, it’s overwhelming, to say the least. They did such a perfect job on the nostalgia of it all and my tears are there as proof. I can let out more, if they need it.

Okay now, trigger warning: Abuse/Domestic violence. Just this part, though.

As a domestic violence survivor, since the first movie I’ve had such a affectionate connection to Beverly. Chapter 2 carried it on quite well, and graphically. It’s one of the things I’m glad they continued that from the book; although it was triggering and deeply upsetting. She had to deal with her father when she was a child, and then her husband? The scene at the beginning with her husband was an asset to the film, and displaying the bruises and marks on her body throughout the film, while she’s with the Losers Club (mostly) happy with them, it brings me more of a... progressive vibe? I’m not quite sure how to explain it, but to think that she has the men from the Losers Club in her life who treat her well and love her, it makes me happy. She deserved so much better though.

SPEAKING OF BEVERLY.. Y’all already know what I’m about to go off about.

Ben and Beverly. I don’t even think I cried as much in Avengers: Endgame as I did at just that scene with Ben and Beverly where they were both stuck in those visuals that Pennywise was giving them (Bev in that bathroom stall with blood, and Ben in the clubhouse). Ben finally yelling that it was him who wrote the postcard, and saying I love you - all of that leading up to them eventually ending up together like they were meant to be. The art of these lovers coming back to one another and still being just as in love with one another as they were as kids? An extraordinary love story.

Now I’m going to write a 37 page long essay about how much I love Richie and Eddie and how they deserved better. Okay?

Before I start, I’d like to take several moments of silence for the Hammock Scene. They were in LOVE.

Alright. If I wasn’t already crying enough over Eddie dying at the end, they made Richie re-scratch “R+E” into the bridge. It is heartbreaking, truly, back when they were kids it was so looked down on to be gay, and they show that with Henry Bowers and his gang constantly throwing homophobic slurs at the Losers Club. Now, after 27 years when Richie and Eddie are finally brought back together, they fall in love all over again just for Eddie to be taken away like that? And when they all had to get out of that cave, they had to literally drag Richie away from Eddie’s body. At that point, I had put my popcorn on the floor to fucking sob. I’m not over-exaggerating. There were so many small details that fuelled the arc of their love in this film. Everything about Reddie in this film cause so much emotional distress, but I still loved it. When I left the theatre, I felt like I couldn’t talk about, let alone watch the film again without sobbing, but now I just want to go watch it again. After everything the Losers Club went through together, from the bullying and homophobia, to Pennywise, to the PTSD of the events from Chapter 1, I wish they had all gotten a happy ending. But alas, Stephen King and his endings.

The Losers Club going to the quarry after killing Pennywise, everybody supporting Richie, it was sentimental as all hell and I just wanna say that I love them so much. I am so emotionally attached to the cast, the characters, everything.

Stanley’s death definitely put me in agony, and just goes to show how heavy the trauma was on the Losers Club. My baby Stanley has always been so afraid, rightfully, and to think about having to go back while in that process of trying to move on from those events - it had to have been painful. Watching it was painful too, the scene came so suddenly and it was super triggering for audiences. And unfortunately, my brain categorised this film as “trauma” and I forgot almost everything that was written in Stanley’s letter. But all I do know is that he deserved better, and the Losers Club certainly did NOT deserve to be taunted by his death like that. They won for him, though. Life or death, they stuck with each other and did each other justice. My favourites.

Bill Skarsgård’s performance in this film was AMAZING. Pennywise didn’t get as much character arc or plot in Chapter 1, so we didn’t get a chance to admire his talent as much. Every actor did such an amazing acting job this film and I truly admire James Ransone for accurately having the same chaotic energy as Jack Dylan Grazer onscreen. Spot on performance. The casting job was flawless, both the behaviour and looks of the older/younger cast match each other so precisely.

I’m not sure how this affected other people, but it did affect me; the idea that these friends went through SO much shit as kids, and still (mostly) managed to make it out alive. Bill became an author, Richie became a comedian - it’s hope, so per se. I hope everyone who sometimes loses hope, watches this movie and knows that if they made it out, you can too.

Honourable mention to the film score. Beautiful and haunting, all at once.

And one last thing,

“If you find someone worth holding onto, never ever let them go.”

[simpingforthehunt]

The Mourner's Kaddish

This episode is my favourite for many reasons. The Hunt introduction was really funny and well filmed. I really love music, and this was an episode I could kind of connect with because of that. Although, do not get me started on how AWFUL Take a Chance by ABBA is. Love ABBA, hate that song specifically. The slow uncovering of a bigger plan, especially at the last scene of the episode. Lastly, Roxy. I elaborate on that in this post.

Masterlist

Warnings:

Antisemitism (obviously), Spoilers for the show

Characters:

Jonah - This is the episode where he's proper introduced to The Hunt, and the darkness. It's overwhelming for him, and while he knew they killed it was still traumatic to watch. I liked the dynamics between Jonah and each character in this episode. Jonah had gone through so much already in the show, and he's lost. The Hunt is something that soon will become a family for him, but for now they scare the hell out of him.

Lonny - Portrayed by Josh Radnor.

I love Lonny, and this episode gave a fantastic introduction to him. Josh Radnor, especially, was the perfect casting choice. He's the comic relief character, and yet still has such an interesting backstory that makes him even more fun to watch. Lonny was the first one of The Hunt to warm up to Jonah and accept him, calling him a Jew-per hero (which still kills me whenever I hear it, that's so funny). I also really love how Lonny kind of becomes Jonah's big brother in the group.

Roxy - Portrayed by Tiffany Boone.

Every single time I see Tiffany Boone on screen, I gay panic. She's not only extremely beautiful, she's insanely talented. There's so much about Roxy we don’t know, and so much I want to find out. We knew she has a daughter, and that Meyer is paying her while she's in The Hunt. But what's her backstory? Is there more to the reason she joined? There's so much about her that needs to be unraveled.

Joe - Portrayed by Louis Ozawa.

He's got a hard exterior, and for good reason. Joe fought in the Vietnam War, and his trauma affects him daily. Of course, we don’t know that about Joe quite yet. All we see of him is this guarded asshole that hates Jonah immediately. Like Roxy, there isn’t much we know about his backstory but I'm excited to see more of it in S2.

Harriet - Portrayed by Kate Mulvany.

I still don't know what to think of Harriet, but I definitely don’t trust her. Obviously more of that will be explained as I continue with this series, but she’s already mysterious. Views Jonah as a child because he did live a pretty guarded life. I do generally like her, but I want to know more about this double agent thing or whatever’s going on. I have a feeling she’ll grow soft for The Hunt, and choose to be with them after everything.

Mindy - Portrayed by Carol Kane. 

Words will never fully describe my love for Carol Kane. I have seen her in multiple different roles, and she’s absolutely incredible! Mindy becoming Jonah’s sort of adoptive Bubbe after Ruth passes is really heartwarming, and as time goes on you see Jonah trusting her and Murray the most. I also love how they wrote her as the stereotypical grandmother, it’s so funny!

Murray - Portrayed by Saul Rubinek. 

Murray will forever remain one of my favourite characters, and I love how he becomes the Zayde that Jonah never had. Murray and Mindy’s old married couple relationship is absolutely perfect and they’re so cute. For one of the few romantic relationships present in the show, it’s perfect. 

Meyer - Last post I talked about him being Dumbledore, but I never touched on my thoughts on that *twist* at the end. I will get more into it when we get to that episode, but I notice a lot of people think that the twist was lazy. Everyone’s entitled to their opinion, but I personally don’t think it was. Lazy would be pulling a “Gossip Girl” and deciding who The Wolf is last minute. They took the time to think it through, and it was clear. Within the subtle foreshadowing of the eventual reveal, and the moments where you second-guess the thought of him not being Meyer  - even during a rewatch - I think it was really well done. Sure, when push comes to shove it was predictable, but I personally think from a creative and writing standpoint it was well done. 

Millie - I feel like most Millie analyses will be me just simping over her, but I really love her character. The way she draws conclusions, and finds the truth is really amazing and I’m so glad to see a character like her for once. Usually, they’ll make character's dumb enough that even the obvious will make you want to scream at them, but I find it so satisfying to watch Millie and root for her because she’s really good at her job.

What I liked:

The opening scene was honestly kinda cool. They did force the prisoners to play music in the camps irl, and I like the choice of Hava Nagila. 

The fact that they named the Bat Mitzvah girl Ruchel after Jonah mentioned the over-the-pants handjob from Ruchel Rubenstein

Why the used a Bat Mitzvah for the introduction is beyond me but it worked So Well

Like come on 

Come Pray with Me

A Couple of Chabad-Asses 

The fact that all Joe did was look at the camera 

I’m gay and Roxy made me panic 

Lonny in general 

The Matchmaker scene followed by Matchmaker from Fiddler on the Roof (hey, I’m a theatre gay XD)

“That’s the Jewist shit I’ve ever heard”

I died when Lonny said ��Judah Macca-bro”

RATED J FOR JEWTASTIC 

Roxy teasing Jonah about the codebreaker thing 

Finding out Millie’s a lesbian I went !!!!! on the inside

What I didn’t like:

There’s some tired tropes, and one of them is viewing the newbie as a kid 

Like,,, it makes sense for Harriet 

But other than that I’m like: dislike that he’s a part of it, but approach it differently. Y’know?

Holstedder SLAMS THE PIANO KEYS 

It hurts me 

Like obviously he’s softer on them throughout 

But there are moments where you can HEAR the piano strings straining because he’s hitting them too hard 

I love music and especially piano, so whenever someone does that it hurts 

Travis

I do not need to elaborate on that 

The Hansel and Gretel thing

It makes sense, and ruined my childhood

Why this specific thing wasn't okay:

In the camps, the dentists only pulled the GOLD teeth from either the alive Jews or the gassed ones. So the tin full of teeth personally made me uncomfy and it was just a bit much.

Explaining specific things the best I can:

The Mourner’s Kaddish is said in honour of the deceased. Only people that are grieving based on the yahrzeit (anniversary) stand while reciting it. My synagogue sings it rather than speaks it, but it depends on the synagogue.

Theories:

I think Sommers is still alive. 

Okay so we see Travis leave his place, clearly having killed and cleaned up a crime scene. However, Sommers is only labelled missing. I feel like there’s more to his story and his partnership with Millie. I just hope they at least pick up his storyline for a couple episodes to close it off.

[sechssstan]

Sechskies Headcanon: First Date

//so in honour of Sechskies’s 23rd Anniversary, here’s a lil something for you all! 23 years guyss, 23! I hope y’all enjoy this!//

Eun Jiwon:

-picks you up

-loses his words as soon as you appear because you were the most beautiful person he ever seen

-brings you to a fancy restaurant, pull your chair for you, wait for you to choose. when you chose something with a side salad, he judged you and scrunched his face

-you talked and talked, and he shared a story about his time filming NJTW

-once you both are done with the meal, he offered his arms and you slid your arms through as you walked to the cashier.

-you insisted to pay but he denied and said you can pay for dessert

-so you both got ice cream (he paid again), and sat at the nearby park where you continue taking and laughing about everything and anything under the sun.

-he drove you home and sent you to your door.

-you were standing with your back against the door and him facing you, wishing time would stop

-he just stared at you and to hide the blush that’s growing on you, you turned to open the door

-but he grabbed your wrist and turned you, “can I kiss you”

-you nodded, closed your eyes as he closed in on you. His breath, his warmth radiated and you thought your heart was gonna leap out on you

-he broke the kiss, hands still on your cheeks, “let’s do this again”

-you blushed so hard, and he just smiled. he waited for you to close the door before leaving.

Lee Jaijin:

-waits for you at the entrance of the museum, nervously

-tells himself that he’s not but when you appear from a distance with your cute dress and curled hair, he felt like his heart was gonna come out of his chest

-“Heyyy! You look great!”

-You were sure that you could feel like ears burning up, and so he laughed at you and brought you in the museum

-you know a bit of art, here and there. But when Jaijin explained to you a portrait, you just wanna listen to him talk forever

-he brought you to a not so crowded gallery and told you how this portrait was his favourite. he likes looking at it if he’s in need of inspiration

-you both then head for dinner at a nearby cafe.

-you guys talked and talked and realised there was nothing to be nervous. Jaijin was ready kind and responsive

-after the dinner, he dropped you off at your house.

-just before you exit the car, he grabbed your forearm and hesitated.

-you looked at him, and he finally said, “do you wanna go out with me again?”

-if only he could hear your heart beating so fast.

-“yes”, you said and kissed the side of his cheeks before leaving

Kim Jaeduck:

-soft boi Jaeduck would pick you up at your front door and pace around nervously

-when you came out, he lost his words because damn you look so out of the world

-you waved your hands in front of his face and he snapped out of his daydream

-Jaeduck brought you to a bowling alley because.., well he’s jaeduck

-“if I win, we will go out again. How about that?” he teased, knudging his elbows.

-“and if I win?” you challenged.

-“then you can choose whatever you want” he grinned.

-Jaeduck started first, and he got a spare. When it was your turn, you got 7 pins. You could see the smug on his face.

-Jaeduck was confident he will win, till the 3rd round onwards. You were getting strikes and spares every round.

-YOU WON.

-“you liar! You said you weren’t good”

-“I said, I wasn’t good because my friends all played Bowling in college” you shrugged

-“fine, what’s your wish?” he asked, wary

-“let’s eat first!”

-and so you did, you headed to the cafe nearby. Jaeduck made jokes, tells you about the time he almost died during dance practice. And you told him about your day, how you are enjoying each day.

-the day ended and he walked you home. “You still haven’t tell me what you want”

-you smiled and before you went home, you looked at him, “my wish is to have a second date”

-Jaeduck just looked at you, surprised. And then broke into the cutest smile.

-he pinched your cheeks lovingly, “you could have just said. You just wasted a wish”

-“I’m more than happy to waste it on you”

Kang Sunghoon:

-Sunghoon will be waiting for you at the lobby with chocolates.

-when you came out, he broke into a smile, excited to see you, but, nervous

-he greeted you and passed you the chocolates.

-Sunghoon would surprisingly bring you to mini Golf, because well he wanted to be “unconventional”

-it wasn’t a bad place, the mood was cool and you actually had the opportunity to play Golf and still talked to him.

-he discussed with you on his latest projects, and things he want to try to do. You told him about your day and how you’re excited for summer to come because you wanna go to the water park.

- “hey if I make this shot, you will go to the waterpark with me”

-you nodded your head, and ushered for him to make the shot.

-and he shot, but it missed the hole. you were disappointed, you hoped that it went him because you wanted to go to the waterpark with him.

-Sunghoon saw your expression and went to the ball and rolled it into the hole, “so do you want to go the waterpark with me?”

-your disappointed face now broke into a small smile and you quickly headed for the next course.

-after the mini Golf reaches its end, both of you chilled at park nearby.

-you guys continued talking and you realised you were slowly having good feelings for the man

-“hey, you didn’t give me an answer” he asked suddenly.

-“you looked down, swinging your feet, “of course I want to”

Jang Suwon:

-classic suwon would bring you for movie and dinner.

-he would wait anxiously for you at the theatre, with the tickets and popcorn and drinks

-when you arrived, he almost dropped the popcorn he was holding because you look really good.

-“woahhhhh” you hurried, saving the popcorns

-suwon regained his conscious, “so I got the stuffs, shall we?”

-you held his arms, “we shall”

-movie was great and occasionally, you would bump hands with suwon when taking the popcorns. In which he will, break into a smile and let you have your turn

-“man, the movie was bad. I’m sorry” he confessed

-“it’s fine, who would have known”

-so dinner was a quiet bbq house. Both of you couldn’t stop talking about how bad the movie was and it made you realise how much you matched each other.

-you talked about food, hobbies, pet peeves, favourite dessert, tips and tricks on surviving in a deserted island.

-and when it suddenly got quiet, suwon suddenly asked, “let’s do this again?”

-you stopped grilling the meat and looked at him, searching for hints in his eyes

-“okay, but I’ll pick the movie next time” you said

[wizisbored]

What are some of your favorite lines you've written for your fics? (Also I'm sorry things aren't going well right now. Sending love 💜)

right its time to go diggin im using this as an excuse to reread everything because i cant think of any lines off the top of my head even though i know theres a shitton

premptively putting a cut here because this will probably end up long as shit and you know what fuck yea to that because fuck yea to being proud of what youve made

SO

hallelujah, first thing i posted:

If those bastards want to make her part of their shitty musical, then she’s going to make it difficult. Or at least inconvenient.

The hive is not inconvenienced in the slightest.’

- idk if this is as funny as i think it is but i find it funny

"Nobody dies with dignity, Emma. There's no honour in the thing, however you dress it up."

- wrote that to sound creepy and now i cant decide whether i actually think its true

But he’s holding her like she’s his salvation, as if it’s his life hanging in the balance.

- salvation is just a good word tbh

It’s hopeless, but she refuses to be killed by a game of fucking ‘got your nose’.

purgatory, intended to be a shitpost but now i unironically think of it as the best thing ive ever written

After a few years (or maybe seconds, it’s not clear) / it takes a moment (or maybe it doesn’t, who knows?) / An undocumentable amount of time passes. /  They might have slipped into an uneasy silence lasting millenia - or milliseconds - if it wasn’t for the jolly tune that suddenly fills the air. / for minutes or years or millenia or maybe even eons / After a brief, indescribably long nap / But the incomprehensible amount of time seems somehow shorter this time.

- 2 in one of fucking with the concept of time and hinting at an unreliable narrator, hell yea. its about the weird atmosphere, baybeeeee

“Does one day of trying the hardest we could outweigh years of not trying at all?” Emma wonders aloud. Paul squeezes her hand.

“I damn hope so.”

He doesn’t ask if she believes in Hell.

- even without context i like this line but in context it really helped set the sombre tone so i could do a full 180 at the end of the chapter

Emma wonders whether they’ve been sent to musical hell for failing to stop the musical apocalypse

- love the implication that there is a hell dedicated to annoying people via musical theatre

“You said- you told her you’d never be in a musical?”

“Yes.”

“And then you died performing a musical number?”

“I- yeah, I did.”

“Brilliant! Now, that is stupid!”

- probably my best characterisation of death, sounds like something that would be said in a stupid deaths bit, i can hear it in his voice

teachers pet

“It’s only blatant if people know about it. So in actual fact this is secret favouritism.”

- hidgens gives absolutely 0 shits about the ethics of the situation good for him

“And if that is kidnapping, well, consider yourself kidnapped.”

- once again ethics simply do not matter

“Oh, where is your sense of adventure? Are you not curious about the results of washing baked beans?”

- this line hants me when im trying to make stew or just have some fucking beans on toast because I am curious about the results of washing baked beans

“Well, if it isn’t, and we both die, then I’ll be quite disappointed. We did spend all evening on this, after all.”

- priorities

finishing what we started, actually originally a scrapped ending idea for igtlt that i liked too much to abandon entirely

“How many bullets?” He eventually asks.

“Enough.”

- they just know what theyve got to do

Only thing left to say is a big ol’ fuck you to… God, everyone else in the fucking world. Oh, and God. Fuck you God, you prick.

- gotta love them tto refs

wildfire, almost 20,000 words of angst that im going to read through because fuck it why not

She doesn't understand the order, at least not yet; a dog doesn't understand the first time she's called to heel. But that can change. Though, from the bared teeth of this dog, the trader guesses it may take a while.

- this is actually something i really like doing in narration, calling a character something in dialogue or comparison and then directly calling them it in the narration

He understands; she doesn't want to show weakness to someone who could exploit her, doesn't want to show gratitude to someone she hates. But the tribeswoman is tired and scared and hurt, and it's obvious. She's broken, at least for today.

The loneliness, however, refuses to wane. It settles in her chest like a physical need, a craving for closeness.

- got inspiration for this description by thinking about hugging my partner while i was stuck in lockdown

"You can say that again," the older woman mutters, shaking her head. "God-fuckin'-damnit, Lauren, why d'you never think about the implications?"

Jemilla turns to her with a questioning look. "Who's Lauren?"

"She-" Molag begins to explain, then pauses. She thinks for a moment, then shakes her head. "I don't even know."

- crossover jokes hell yea

He’s tolerable, she’s decided, at least relatively so, but not trustworthy. If she could truly trust him then he wouldn’t be involved in all this. If she could trust him, she wouldn’t know him.

The thinly-veiled threat in his grin

She stares up at the man, shaking, whimpering, pleading. Wordlessly begging for him to stop.

- gotta love reaching the breaking point

She probably looks insane, bruised and bloody and laughing quietly to herself in a cage. She doesn’t care. They can think she’s insane, just as long as they don’t think they broke her.

laughing as they rediscover half-forgotten days spent as children let loose in a world that seemed so huge and yet so small at the same time

“You know, kids like Zazzalil - scrawny little things born as Autumn died - they’re not supposed to see Spring.”

- i will see any character without a detailed fleshed-out backstory and say ‘is anyone going to make headcannons about that’ and then not wait for an answer

Maybe the pain will shock her out of her head.

im going to live twice

It feels more like a bag of broken crockery than a human.

- this was the only time ive ever had to describe something really gory and decided to make it as uncomfy as possible

she notices with a concerning level of non-concern

Paul Matthews is gone, boy. And if I catch you using a dead man’s name again, well.

- its about the ✨forced disconnect✨

It stares at him, and for a moment he sees the young man that Benny used to be, silently pleading for the agent to tell him he'll be okay.

"In my defence, that was the Colonel's idea.” The man raises his hands in surrender. “I wanted to call you Lauren. I was outvoted.”

- i will take literally any chance to make a 4th wall joke and that is a threat

“I’ll see what can be done,” he assures it, knowing full well that nothing will be.

- xander doesnt flat out abuse emma in the way mcnamara and shaffer do but hes still cruel in subtler ways

“No chance of being hurt?”

Xander nods. “No chance of you being hurt.”

-  ✨foreshadowing ✨

If only he was free, free to just get up and go find Blue and tell her - actually tell her, out loud, with words - that she’s going to be okay. If only he could say that and have it be the truth.

She holds onto that piano. Right now, as she kneels crying into the tabletop, it's all she has.

- ‘sir thats my emotional support near-complete stranger’

smoke and feathers

Irony can be a cruel, twisted bitch.

- probably the best opener ive written

There’s a sort of pathetic irony in the fact that she slipped on a stone while wading across a shallow stream and broke her neck.

The stars move across the sky, and she still doesn’t know why.

- sounds poetic and all while also being a fuck you to the chorn twist because i hate it

It seems like every time she looks away the moon goes from waxing to waning and back again, time marching onwards in one unending night, swallowing one unending forest.

Even with her limited view of the person’s face, Zazzalil can see the softness in their expression. She’s hit with a pang of longing for Jemilla.

They share those tender looks that make Zazzalil long for home.

The kind of silence only shared between people who can appreciate the simplicity of each other’s presence

aaand thats pretty much all of em. i know when you said ‘some’ you probably meant less than this but i will give a consice answer to a question when pigs fly. i was going to do the double e au too but its past 1 am now and im going to bed. thanks for this ask because whether intentionally or not you just made me read 48,860 words of fic and thats a damn good distraction when things are getting a bit shitty :)

[selfmademen]

Top Surgery Experience

Okay, so I said I would do a write up of my top surgery experience and I’ve finally gotten around to it. Uni started right after so I’ve been fairly frazzled.

Please feel free to ask any questions you may have! I’ll do my best to answer them.

To start with, I currently live in NSW, Australia. There are a few Australian top surgeons, but as a NSW resident my best bet was Dr Steven Merten, with Pure Aesthetics in Sydney. Because Australia has a public healthcare system I was able to get my top surgery under that scheme. As far as I’m aware Dr Merten is the only top surgeon who offers this surgery through the public system. He works in partnership with Concord Hospital in Sydney, and that’s where I had my surgery. If you go privately there are other options for the hospital you stay at. There are pros and cons to the public system, which I’ll detail below.

Pros:

I paid $500~ out of pocket instead of between $5k and $10k (if you have private health insurance it may cover some)

Since he’s in my state I didn’t have to travel far

He’s one of the most experienced top surgeons in the state

there’s two places for appointments, either at his clinic or at the Macquarie uni rooms

Cons:

because I went publicly he didn’t perform the surgery personally, rather a registrar did. However, he was in the room the entire time overseeing the operation.

because he’s so popular I had to wait a full year from the first consultation to the actual surgery date

 it was extremely hard to get onto the wait list due to how popular he is.

the public system is only available to NSW residents over 18

I was lucky in that my GP at the time knew him professionally and called in a favour so that I knew the moment his books were open, and I am forever grateful for that. It is MUCH easier to get an appointment with him through the private system, but that’s a lot more expensive. For me, the pros far outweighed the cons here, and I decided I could wait a year for my surgery. I had also intended to lose weight beforehand, but that didn’t happen. Woops.

Prior to my first consultation I needed a referral both from my GP, and a registered psychologist or psychiatrist detailing my transition and documented dysphoria surrounding my breasts. The first consultation was $300 iirc, and I paid a $100 deposit, so only paid $200 on the day. Medicare also gave me a $100-something rebate.

The first consultation was fairly quick. He asked some questions about my transition, what my expectations were regarding surgery, detailed my options, and explained the procedures. He measured my breasts, but never touched me (I kinda just picked them up and moved them where he asked). He also took a photo of my chest, with my consent.

I didn’t actually hear from them until about three months before my surgery because my details got lost, but USUALLY the hospital will get in contact with you regarding your surgery date, what you should expect, and when your pre-op consultation is. I also had to fill out a pre-op health questionnaire and personal details. Due to my high level of haemoglobin as a side effect of T, I was required to provide them with more recent blood test results, but you may not have to do this. Usually there is also a pre-op appointment with the nurses and anethetist at the hospital, but the nurse I spoke to said that I didn’t need to go if I didn’t have any pressing concerns.

My pre-op consult with Dr Merten was a couple of weeks before my surgery, however, it’s usually around the same time. This one was $100, and I also had to pay $130 for a medical compression vest which I have to wear for up to three weeks post-op. Again, Medicare partially reimbursed my consultation fee, but not the vest.

During this consultation we basically covered the same things, and I also saw a nurse who told me what medications to avoid, and briefed me on post op care. She also gave me my medical vest, wound tape, and some pamphlets.

Some things she covered:

smokers should stop smoking 12 weeks before surgery

 you should limit your alcohol intake the week before surgery, and don’t drink alcohol AT ALL during the two days immediately prior to surgery

no herbal medications, asparin, ibuprofen, or other blood thinners for two weeks prior to surgery. IF YOU ARE ON BLOOD THINNERS FOR MEDICAL REASONS THIS MAY BE DIFFERENT FOR YOU.

do not eat or drink anything from midnight the night before your surgery. Morning medication (antidepressants in my case) can be taken with a sip of water.

 the night before and morning of surgery I had to shower with a special soap that was provided in order to kill bacteria on my skin.

I did have to call the admissions centre the day before my surgery to confirm my appointment time. For me it was 8:30. Before going in I had a brief interview with a nurse, who took down my details and checked me for allergies and medical conditions. I was given my wrist bands (red, since I have a codeine allergy), and directed up to where I would meet the nurses. There I changed into the operating gown (you can keep your undies on) and compression socks due to my weight.

I was taken to a prep room before the operating theatre where Dr Merten marked my chest. Basically where things would be cut, lipo’d, etc. I was feeling nervous so the anethetist also came in, did my canula and gave me something to relax (don’t know what it was). He was extremely kind and friendly, and said he was honoured to be included in this part of my journey, which I honestly thought was an incredibly sweet thing to say, and I’m very grateful for how he looked after me.

The relaxation shit kinda made me dopey, and pretty much immediately I was wheeled into the theatre. They had me wriggle from the bed onto the table, I nearly fell off, but it was all good. I don’t really remember much from here, but there was some music playing, and the nurses and registrar were setting up.

At this point the anethetist put the mask on and told me to take some deep breaths. I remember it tasting and smelling really weird, and the next thing I know I was waking up in recovery.

I’m not sure how long I was in recovery for because I kept drifting in and out, but they gave me something for the pain and then wheeled me to the ward. I started waking up properly around this time, had a chat with the people transporting me, and by the time I was in the ward I was fully alert (and really needed to pee).

Because of my size and the way the surgery worked out, I did have a few staples at the ends of my incisions, and I also had to put the compression vest on. I also had drains, with bags that needed to be changed every twelve hours. Nurses would also come and take my blood pressure and check that everything was okay and that I wasn’t in too much pain. They were all extremely welcoming and accepting, never misgendered me once, and even double checked my name and pronouns to ensure that everyone knew. My mate was also allowed to stay with me pretty much the whole day until dinner, which really helped me cos I’m bad with hospitals.

After surgery I was stiff and ached a little, but there wasn’t too much pain. I was able to go to the toilet myself, although wiping was very difficult for the first week.

I stayed overnight, and was discharged the next day. They gave me anti-inflammatories, antibiotics, and some opiates to help the pain. I should note here that I do have an extremely high pain tolerance, so outside of days where I pushed myself a bit too far, I generally didn’t need to use them.

I’m unsure if my experience is unusual, as I was able to do pretty much everything immediately post-op. Of course, I’ve been taking it easy, but dressing, sleeping, cooking, moving, has all so far been generally okay. I have had some pain on days where I moved about too much, or sat up too much, but that’s also partially chronic pain flaring up due to my bad back.

I was discharged with my drains still in, as I’m a bleeder. Usually with Dr Merten they’re removed before discharge, but I was sent home with some bags and instructed to change them every 24 hours and keep a record of how much had drained. I think I wound up keeping my drains in for around a week before they were removed.

I went to the medical centre twice to have my dressings changed and drains checked (and eventually removed), and was sent home with a sterile staple remover for my GP to remove my staples with. They’ll be coming out at the end of the week. The drains didn’t hurt when removed, it just felt like an odd tugging sensation. The stitches Dr Merten used are dissolving ones, so no need to get them taken out.

I do have to change my nipple dressings every three days, and the tape on my incisions can stay on for up to a week. The stuff I use is extremely strong and has glue on it, so I’m a bit hesitant to change it on my own (nearly ripped a staple out last time I changed my dressings).

I’m roughly three weeks post-op now, and I have pretty much all my mobility back. Showering is difficult, as is bending over or reaching to one side (tugs on my incisions). There is pain when I do things, but unless something actively tugs at, touches, or puts pressure on my wounds I’m not in any pain. Mostly its just an annoyance at this stage.

I’m still sleeping on my back, although I can lie on my side for short periods of time. There’s some bruising around my armpits where I had liposuction, and there is a small numb patch on my left side. I can’t feel my nipples, but I also couldn’t feel them prior to this so it’s not a huge loss.

I’ve seen some people say that they felt depressed post-op because of a hormone fluctuation, but personally when I saw my chest it felt natural and right. I didn’t cry (not a big crier) and I wasn’t surprised or shocked or… overwhelmed. To me it was my outer body finally reflecting my inner self. I already looked like this in my own mind, so it was just natural that it looks the way it does post-op.

Unfortunately some dysmorphia and self-esteem issues surrounding my weight have resurfaced, but that’s not really related to the top surgery, and it’s something I’m able to work on as I recover.

If there’s something I haven’t covered that you’re curious about, please send an ask! I’ve tried to be as thorough as possible, but its been a few weeks and some details are fuzzy.

[kukuandkookie]

So, I'm making a story which may or may not be a remake of a old story I made, but with a new setting, new characters, a different tone, and a new storyline. Any writing tips?

Ahhh first off, I just wanted to say how honoured I am that you’d feel like asking me for writing tips! And I must also apologize if this is at all late, since Tumblr has this bad habit of not really notifying me when someone sends me an ask. PS: This might get long ahaha. I tend to ramble a lot. 😅

My first piece of advice is to read and study what you read! I often get inspired by a good book after I’ve finished reading and begin itching to write, but I actually learned how to write stories by imitating the Warriors series when I was a kid. 

I’d also highly recommend studying grammar. Not so much so that it becomes boring and no fun, but enough that it doesn’t hinder your story. Bad grammar or spelling doesn’t usually ruin a story unless it’s really bad, but it can pull someone out of your story. When reading over my classmates’ works, I usually found they worked quite well when read out loud, but reading it over myself caused me to spot those sort of grammatical errors and it would draw me out of the atmosphere they were creating for their story.

And on the topic of atmosphere, it is important to set the scene and also describe things, but definitely don’t go overboard. It often comes off as pretentious or cumbersome, breaking the flow of writing. I do describe certain things while writing, but I usually focus more on dialogue.

When it comes to dialogue, every character has their own voice, so they won’t all sound the same! Make sure to tag their dialogue with variety as well (like, don’t constantly use “he said, she said”). Try looking at other novels. Sometimes authors use “cried, scolded, screeched, begged,” etc). Sometimes they don’t use any dialogue tags at all so as not to break the flow of dialogue.

For example, this is a piece from the chapter I’m currently writing:

Or for something more casual:

The second one had four voices going on, but hopefully the voices flowed naturally enough and it wasn’t too confusing who’s who. If flow is hard to tell, you can try reading it out loud; it’ll also help you pick up on repetition.

Repeating something can be really good for dramatic effect, but too much repetition can also be bad. This is something I’ve had drilled into me by my English teachers since high school. Seeing the same few words a thousand times isn’t very interesting, so try to vary your vocabulary! There’s a whole internet out there to help you find the right words (for example, instead of always writing “angry,” you can look up “angry synonyms”).

Fictional writing, or creative nonfiction, is also where you can break a few rules of English for more dramatic flair. For example, there’s no need to always have full sentences. An incomplete sentence will stand out. 

Definitely be sure to vary sentence length so not everything looks the same. And every time a new action/piece of dialogue happens, it’s a general rule to start a new line.

I like keeping certain things about my characters and world vague and versatile so that I can play around with it more, although I know worldbuilding and detailed characters are important to many writers. It’s okay if your characters start off a little flat—the more you write for them, the more their personality will come alive and have proper depth. 

Sometimes I make a character because I feel like it and I give them a name I just feel like fits. I once made a character with curly brown hair and green eyes and randomly named him Ross, but I eventually incorporated the meaning of his name into his backstory (promontory or headland). He evolved while writing from a more cocky character to someone who is kind and quiet, but stubborn, distant, and has trouble getting over the past.

Of course writing characters also depends on your style. I have a friend who enjoys picking meaningful names for their characters, and there are authors who like to write down all the personality traits, flaws, and strengths right away. I prefer going with the flow, which I find isn’t a bad place to start, but the other way isn’t bad at all!

I usually like fleshing out the backstories for all of my characters, probably more than things like height or birthday. And that’s mostly because every person has their own story and their own scars, so it can affect them in different ways. Even flat characters I first develop just to be a villain often end up becoming more sympathetic later because I decided to focus on their backstories.

And of course we know everyone says “don’t write a Mary Sue!” but characters that seem pretty perfect can still come off as flawed and likeable. Not writing a Mary Sue doesn’t mean writing someone who is boring or terrible at everything or horrible to everyone—there is often a reason the hero is the one with some form of hidden skill or talent.

I’m going to pull on the character of my current obsessions as an example: Wei Wuxian from the novel Mo Dao Zu Shi. He’s intelligent, heroic, kind, and powerful, but such good things can also be translated into bad ones. Flaws are often exaggerations of positives. So for example, even though Wei Wuxian is intelligent, he’s still brash and reckless. He’s heroic, but this translates into a hero complex with impulsiveness, a lack of foresight, and can drive other people away. His kindness can turn into rage or self-sacrifice, and his power makes him arrogant.

Like with the thing on Mary Sues, try not to always worry about avoiding clichés or tropes. It’s good to avoid them, but they’re also staples of writing for a reason, and people do like what’s familiar (in my Film Studies classes, we describe movie tastes as “people want to see what they’re familiar with, but with something unfamiliar sprinkled in”). So it’s okay to use clichés/tropes sometimes, but don’t rely too much on them or your story will feel generic. Add your own twist!

But speaking of twists, don’t try and shock your readers with plot twists out of nowhere. Don’t panic if a reader picks up on your clues and then change the twist to something that doesn’t make sense just to shock the reader. This often cheats people of their experience. If they guess your plot twist, it can mean you laid down the right clues! But if you really want to shock them, try to drop enough hints for the new twist so it makes sense. For example, I find Coco’s plot twist much more sensible than Frozen’s.

Oh, and try not to worry too much about things like Chekhov’s gun. I had a Writing prof ask us to keep it in mind, but I find it more applicable to short stories, and that’s because it started as a rule for theatre. If you show a gun in your play, it should be used later by a character as a sort of payoff. In a longer story, this is less relevant as not every prop has to be important. Still, if you focus a lot on a particular thing, you should probably go back and explain it later. 

I have a bad habit of sometimes mentioning things that seem important to characters at the time and totally forgetting it later until I reread old chapters. For example, I had one character who doesn’t have his mom with him anymore be interested in a ring box in one chapter, but I forgot about it for awhile. I later explained that it was his mom’s wedding ring, which is why he cared about it so much.

I do often get lucky, as my two long-term stories (one that’s close to being wrapped up and one that’s already finished) have both filled most plot points sometimes by chance. I usually just start writing without a real idea of where I’m going—sometimes the stuff I write just establishes characters or their backstories—but they usually start forming into a proper plot later on when I’ve established more characters and backstories and figure out where I want the climax to go.

I’m not saying that my way is the right or only way though! It helps a lot of authors to map everything out from the very beginning. I just find certain plot points change as my writing improves, so I start off with less plan but usually end up coming up with a proper story bible for me to follow as I write. Research and planning, at the end of the day, are still really helpful!

The hardest problem with writing is that we need our readers to care. If they don’t care, then the thing you work painstakingly on won’t feel as rewarding. And it’s easier to have people care when your characters/plot/world are interesting, feel real, and are likeable (or at least have a “love to hate” thing going on for them). Not every character needs to be tragic and edgy—most people recommend against this—but they can still be sympathetic. Sometimes though, characters are just villains or just background characters, and that’s fine too! 

Plus everyone has different tastes, so it’s never guaranteed everyone will like your story—but then again, it’s no guarantee everyone won’t like it either!

I hope all of that helps, and that I haven’t scared you off with my ranting! Writing is a world of infinite possibilities, and I find it easier to test more of those possibilities than with drawing. At the end of the day, don’t forget to write for yourself and write what you also like. Improvement comes with practice, after all!

[mystic-vision]

Highschool AU : HC where RFA+V+Saeran react to MC being too friendly with her teacher??? (RFA+V+Saeran is also a student and they're not a pair yet, but they fell hard for MC)5

(warning, really long mini-fanfics ahead! )

it’s really weird to be too friendly to a stranger teacher so i made them relatives^^

Zen

nights spent under the dim light of the han’s basement which the drama club called their theatre were the best to the class. be it the hundreds of pillows and fur carpets or the many snacks and drinks provided to the students.

despite the various studies and homework piled over them, they didn’t really care as topics threw themselves around, from stories to gossip, everything was taken in and joked about.

hyun sat hugging one of the colourful pillows as he scrolled through his ig, behind him was a fellow clubmate who had the honour of braiding his hair as they listened to the chatter of the others. “ hmm? ” she suddenly spoke. “ isn’t that MC ? ”

with a nod of his head, he liked the picture and scrolled past. “ have you heard though? ” someone from the back spoke, gathering the attention of everyone. “ she’s hitting it off with vanderwood! ”

gasps spread throughout the large room, earning a laugh from hyun. “ she’s just really friendly, ” he argued. “ extremely nice and easy to talk to. ”

“ look at you and your crush ! ” they laughed as blood rushed towards hyun’s face and he started laughing loudly, pushing the topic aside.

okay maybe, just maybe , his friends were right about her being too friendly with the teacher- but there’s no way, a teacher!

he grit his teeth as he watched vanderwood rest his hand on her arm, giving her a couple of papers before she had smiled at him dearly.

the sight horrified him- he realized how possessive he seemed but the heavy knot she had tied him with was driving him crazy, he couldn’t deny her charm and he hated the sight of her, with his least favourite teacher.

as the said hated man walked away, MC was left standing alone besides her locker. a chance that couldn’t be wasted, hyun did grasp it and walk towards her. “ hey babe ” he winked, earning a laugh from her.

“ hello, zen. ” she emphasized at the nickname the school gave him, as she opened her locker, shoving her books inside before taking others out.

a smile tugging at his lips, he rested the side of his arm on the locker, looking at the shorter female, “ i’ll give you the honour of calling me hyun. ”

she smiled and the butterflies decided to go mad and tug on his heartstrings. “ i know, uh, this seems really mad. ” he suddenly said, courage taking the best of him. “ but everyone’s going around saying you’re kickin it off with vanderwood and some other rumors of you havin a boyfriend and i tho- ”

the sudden words brought a loud laugh out of her, interrupting the white headed, “ vanderwood ? ” she said, unable to contain her shock. “ he’s my cousin- last time i checked, i didn’t have a boyfriend ”

information running through hyun’s mind took him a moment to process them properly. surprise was no doubtly showing on his face as MC excused herself and walked away, a smile still on her face.

what a pleasing thing to learn, he thought as relief washed itself over his chest. so he had a chance with her and that assured him very much.

Jumin

school festivals weren’t really jumin’s thing, until of course his parents decided to endorse into the activities of the school and thus, he was forced to join in on the hype, much to his dismay.

he sighed, looking at the list of requirements as his friends on the other hand seemed to be having the fun of their lives. really, what was so pleasing about cleaning and decorating yourself when someone could do it for you?

but well, not everyone is from a rich family like you, mr han.

sighing once more, his dear friend jihyun pushed a box towards him which seemed to be filled with different and colourful decorations.

okay, maybe helping the others wasn’t a bad thing, he thought as he saw who happened to be a family friend and his crush, MC, walk into the room carrying large cardboards.

jumin, being the gentleman he is, did not hesitate to rush in and help her in carrying the large amount she was carrying.

as he was setting them aside, their art teacher walked in and his immediate reaction was to wrap his arm around MC’s shoulder.

she didn’t shy up from his behaviour and instead smiled at him, resulting in jumin’s stomach aching as if it was tied in a knot.

soon enough, MC had excused herself out and the teacher remained to help along with the cardboards.

a chance was given to the chaebol as he was left alone in the room with the teacher. and as the mentioned man had requested a hand from jumin to tie ribbons around the classroom, the student didn’t reply and started at the teacher. “ are you and MC dating ? ” he asked, bluntly.

“ i quite fancy her and thus, i’ll be the selfish and spoiled child i am, ” he added, “ i will tell the management about this. you know clearly we are not of the legal ag- ”

the laughter erupting from his teacher’s lips filled the quiet room and brought a shocked expression upon jumin’s face. “ god, han. ” he said as he tried to regain his breath, “ have you forgotten that i’m her uncle ? ”

sudden realization hit jumin, “ i apologize. ” he replied sternly, “ i fear i am too attached. ” he said with a chuckle, receiving a nod from the teacher.

Yoosung

the blond tried to mantain the best of his sanity, keeping his mouth shut and eyes open as he read through the japanese book- god, who decided learning japanese as a secondary language midway was a perfect idea?

the quiet atmosphere of the library didnt help. and you know what was worse? his elementary crush which happened to still be his crush in highschool sat opposite to him, studying whatever she was doing.

yoosung just wanted to look up from his book to admire her beautiful features, sinking deep into his mind palace which was literally filled with imaginations of her, but really- he had a test tomorrow!

focus yoosung, focus.

a sudden figure sat down in the opposite table where MC was and yoosung had noticed it from the top of his eyes.

curiousity took the best of him and he looked up, to find his history teacher seated rather close to MC, who smiled at him as she tugged a fallen strand of hair behind her ear- the simgle gesture tugged a smile on the teacher’s lips-

furious, yoosung didn’t know how to react to the sight infront of him, he wanted to scream at the teacher yet he tried to keep it in, fuck’s sake it’s a library.

nope, he couldn’t. he wanted to be the good guy here and thus he gathered up his books, forcing them into his bag as he got up to wherever his feet would take him.

lack of sleep due to excessive gaming was a norm to the blond, but lack of sleep due to excessive gaming because his crush was being too nice with his history teacher was certainly rather specific and strange.

he spotted the culprit of his sorrow, the history teacher himself, standing infront of the vending machine, sipping his iced coffee.

with no hesitation, yoosung walked up to him and stared right up into his eyes. “ are you flirting with MC ? dating her ? ” he said, fists clenched.

the teacher almost spat his drink out from the sudden outburst of his student- “ i’m her brother’s boyfriend.. ”

the sudden realization hit yoosung- of course, he forgot because he didn’t care! the history teacher came out to the class last year and he indeed mentioned he was getting engaged to someone!

how immature yoosung seemed had his cheeks painted with the darkest shade of red, “ oh god i’m so sorry mr park! ” he said loudly as he continuously bowed his head.

in response, the teacher merely laughed, “ you have a thing kickin for my lil sis in law huh? ” he said before patting yoosung’s shoulder, wishing him goodluck.

and that was how MC learned that yoosung had a crush on her and why she decided to confront him about it next day. and to say the least, both were very happy about the results of them helping each other out with history and japanese in the comfort of yoosung’s shithole of an apartment since they were kicked out of the library for being too loud.

Jaehee

chemistry class, how fun it was for jaehee.

mostly because she was partnered up with her dearest friend and crush, MC. the naive girl couldn’t tell of jaehee’s obvious feelings towards her and that sent doubts upon jaehee.

was MC into jaehee? into girls even? the thought of this topic brought shivers down jaehee’s spine often yet she promised herself to enjoy each quality moment with MC anyways.

the book didn’t help much in describing what needed to be done and certainly the two didn’t understand anything, and thus MC decided to call for the teacher-

the teacher, the smile on jaehee’s face died down as the man headed towards the two. she hated him, for the reason that he seemed to be too comfortable and flirty with MC and it made jaehee personally uncomfortable for her friend.

as soon as he arrived and leaned down hand wrapped around mc’s shoulder, she smiled at him and explained the struggles of the two with a soft, polite voice.

jaehee frowned, huffing as the teacher explained a point similar to what jaehee had in mind earlier but MC refused to do-

but as soon as the teacher had suggested it, MC rushed to do it without hesitation, pushing jaehee on her nerves even more.

shortly after class, the two girls sat in the cafeteria discussing different topics all coming from MC. the other gal replied dryly and seemed to be lost in a daze.

the sudden switch of behavior confused MC and she decided its best to discuss the elephant in the room. “ are you okay ? ” she asked, resting her arm on jaehee’s shoulder.

with a distressed look and a confused mind, jaehee found the courgae inside of her, “ look, i dont want to lose you as a friend-” MC frowned at the sudden talk, “ but are you and that teacher a thing ? ” she asked.

“ you see- ”

MC groaned. “ he’s my brother! ” she said. “ alot of people mistake us for one because he loves hugs ” she huffed. “ besides i’m not even into men, i thought you knew that ? ”

jaehee’s eyes widened, “ n-no, actually i never knew. ”“ oh gosh, i hope you don’t feel awkward now ! ” MC suddenly said- blood rushing to her cheeks. “ i mean well um- ”

jaehee smiled widely. “ hearing you say that gives me confidence to tell you that i really like you- ” she shot up, her cheeks painted with the hues of red.

MC smiled, closing in on jaehee to give her a chasté kiss on the lips. “ i hoped so. ”

707

with an assignment due ending tomorrow, saeyoung had a rough time deciding whether he should spend his night hours surfing through the internet or continuing his work.

the answer was obvious when it came to saeyoung, he could finish the essay easily before handing it in but he could never see the hundreds of posts waiting for him again!

with a few clicks, he had opened his ig and continued to scroll through whatever he had on his feed, stopping and laughing at the silliest of memes.

after a while, he had stopped at a picture of the girl who captured his heroific heart, the one and only, MC.

he didn’t know whether it was her keeping up with his retarded jokes or be it her own dorky personality but he knew more than well that she had him hooked up and knotted around her little finger.

but, she wasn’t alone. along her was his teacher, vanderwood, hugging her tightly to his chest.

he couldn’t believe his eyes. vanderwood knew of his crush on the girl since the two were closest as friends rather than teacher and student.

he rushed to his text messages, about to write to his so-called-friend before realizing it would stirr problems. bros before hoes.. right?

but vanderwood broke the code first- well, he would talk to him tomorrow.

the sudden overwhelming atmosphere had saeyoung too frustrated to continue scrolling and so he decided he should finish that essay.

rushing into the teacher’s staffroom, he found vanderwood standing- but not alone.

there stood MC, smiling up at vanderwood as he rested his arm on her shoulder.

saeyoung grit his teeth, feeling sick at the mere sight. he wanted MC to be his for sure but if she was happier with vanderwood..

insecurities hit the redheaded like a truck. he felt himself shrink and a heavy weight was pushed onto his back.

“ oh! choi. ” the voice recognized as vanderwood’s had saeyoung look up at the teacher. “ hey, did you meet my cousin? ” he said and saeyoung’s eyes widened.

MC giggled, “ hello! godly 707, savior of the universe ! ” she grinned as she saluted him.

the silly gesture sent a smile on saeyoug’s face before confusion looked at vanderwood. “ what ? youre cousins ? ”

the two relatives nodded, “ today’s my birthday you dumbass, where’s my present? ” vanderwood crossed his arms.

collecting the fragements, saeyoung started to laugh loudly, shocked at the information he never knew.

saeyoung threw the assignment papers at vanderwood, before laughing more. “ savior of the universe 707 shall take his 606 and leave! ” he shot up, taking MC’s hand and rushing out of the staffroom.

V

school trips especially to the wonderful natural sightspots were one of the most favourite things to jihyun. the rustling of the win against the trees as the leaves fell far from their home was a pleasing sound to his ears.

his love for nature was undeniable indeed, but only one thing beat that passionate connection and it had to of course be the one person that enchanted him with her grace.

she stood beneath an apple tree outside the old manor they were visiting. her lonely figure attracted him to go downstairs and outside to see how more she could make him fall for her

yet as he went through the garden door, she was no longer in solitary as she stood next to a taller figure which jihyun could recognize immediately.

the teacher accompanying them had took the empty spot next to her and she smiled at him dearly.

envy rushed through jihyun’s veins and he cringed. was he too possessive? yes, excessively but what could he blame himself for? he was too attached ever since she had transferred to his class last year, when she had offered to help him in researching about the different species of animals and plants for his essay.

as the teacher left, jihyun sighed to himself in relief. he was about to enter as well before MC herself caught up to him, grinning. “ hey ji ! ”

he smiled back at her, emotions mixing up. her smile wanted to wash away the jealousy yet he had noticed how overly friendly MC was with that teacher when he was announced as their companion. as a matter of fact, she burst with happiness when she heard the news.

“ hello. ” he tried to reply with cheer tainting his voice but she of course, noticed the fake smile and damn her she had the audacity to ask what was wrong.

being the simple man he was, jihyun thought to himself that it would be better to have her ask but he brushed it aside, replying with a dry nothing, yet his facade was seen through.

MC hummed an alright before she started talking about different topics. jihyun listened to her ramble about the place and it’s beauty before- “ even my brother liked it! ”

brother?

“ your brother is with us ? ” he said with surprise. the girl nodded and explained that the teacher accompanying them was actually her brother!

thanks to that information, jihyun felt at ease. the tightened feeling around his chest vanished almost immediately and a smile was set wide on his face. MC had noticed the change of heart and she had to address it. “ something wrong ? ”

jihyun laughed and explained his misunderstanding. “ you must really like me, huh? ” MC winked and let out multiple giggles as she saw the reddening of jihyun’s cheeks.

Unknown

surprisingly enough, the test was rather easy to answer for saeran, thanks to saeyoung’s hours of lecturing in order to make a powerful genius duo but the younger twin just couldn’t buy the whole ‘godly duo’ shit saeyoung was selling.

he hummed his way through the hallway as he looked for his companion which happened to be the deadly woman who caught his heart and ripped it out.

although he had yet to regain that heart, it didn’t really matter to him because he knows it’ll be safe with her.

with her completely out of sight, saeran presumed that she had already left the building and was somewhere outside.

his feet rushed him to the entrance of school and as he got closer, he saw her standing there with a gorgeous smile on her face. her face was flustered with the brightest of expression as her cheeks were painted with the darkest shade of blushing red.

with his lips tugging up in happiness as butterflies started to tug at his heartstrings, he hurriedly jogged towards her- but he realized, she wasn’t alone.

it was that damned teacher,

the teacher that pissed off saeran the most. he always pushed himself on MC and what made saeran feel worse about him was that MC happily accepted it.

the thought pissed him off and to see MC smile at him so dearly made the student burn with jealousy tainting his every inch.

as that teacher left MC’s side and headed back inside, saeran rushed into a corner that wasn’t quite visible to where his bestfriend stood.

the moment the teacher had passed by saeran, he caught a grip of his arm and pulled him in, staring deadly into his eyes.

naturally, the teacher was shocked to say the least as he looked up at the student, “ i’ll say it nicely, you have zero chanced with MC. you’re too wacky and you have a horrible taste in those.. ” saeran looked up and down at the teacher, “ gosh, hideous. ”

as he let go of the teacher, he glared at him once more. “ you know we ain’t legal and she’s out of your league. ” he said once more as he walked away.

MC rushed towards saeran, eyes widened. he looked at her in utter confusion, waiting for her to say something. “ did you call my brother hideous ? ”

i fucked up

the gal started to giggle suddenly, “ you really got him ! ” she said, trying to breathe in as much air as she could, “ i never saw him so surprised! he really likes you. ” with a grin on her face, she reached up to kiss saeran’s cheek.

“ and i do too ! ”

[teamfreewill-imagine]

The Graul Girls

Summary: It had been you and your mom your whole life until she met Jensen. You weren’t the easiest teen, but neither of you would’ve had it any other way Words: 1.3k Danneel’s Daughter!Reader, Danneel x Jensen  Warnings: none (ignore the fact that irl Danneel didn’t have insta in 2012/13) Written for @thing-you-do-with-that-thing ‘s Girl Power challenge (thanks for the extension!!!), my prompt was ‘raising teenagers’

Your name: submit What is this?

“Baby, are you packed?” your mom shouted from the bottom of the stairs, startling you out of your daydream.

“Uh, yeah?” you called back unconvincingly, throwing some clothes into your case.

“Elta Y/N Graul, you told me you’d done it last night,” she replied, and you zipped the half-filled case in panic as you heard her begin to climb the staircase.

You let your hair out of its loose braid, running your hands through it to try and look slightly more presentable seeing as you were still in your robe.

You opened your bedroom door just as she went to knock.

“What’s up?” you asked, going for casual.

One look at your mother’s face told you that playing it cool wasn’t going to work.

“Alright, I hadn’t packed,” you admitted, walking into your room and letting her follow as you unzipped your case, knowing that you needed to pack better for your week in Vancouver. “I got distracted.”

“Sure,” she sighed, rolling her eyes. “Get dressed, I’ll sort this.”

You threw your arms around her and kissed her cheek.

“Alright, get,” she laughed, kissing your temple and pushing you back. “The car will be here in fifteen and you can’t go to the airport naked.”

You walked to your wardrobe, pulling out the outfit and shoes that you had decided on the night before when you were supposed to be packing.

Your mom eyed the shoes wordlessly as she started to fold your clothes and neatly re-pack everything.

“What?” you questioned defensively as you began to change. “They’re cute.”

“I know, I bought them,” she laughed softly. “But we’re going on a plane, not to a fashion show.”

You rolled your eyes as you pulled on a plain white t-shirt.

“But we’re going to a TV set,” you reminded her. “Gotta catch me some gorgeous actor.”

Your mom stopped what she was doing to stare at you in shock.

“Y/N, you’re fifteen,” she emphasised. “Everyone on Jay’s show is my age.”

You shrugged as you pulled on your jeans, tucking in your tee as you fastened the button.

“Maybe there’s a young guest star around,” you reasoned. “Or someone from another show. ‘Couver is full of ‘em.”

She rolled her eyes, packing your make-up bag into your case.

“Hey, no,” you protested. “I’m gonna need that before we go.”

“You don’t have time, and you don’t need it,” she told you. “You’re gorgeous.”

“I know, I take after my mama,” you grinned as you chose your jewellery.

“In too many ways,” your mom murmured, zipping up your case now that it was actually packed. “Carry the shoes downstairs, don’t ruin the floor. There’s breakfast in the kitchen.”

“And-”

“And I have snacks in my cabin bag,” she promised, knowing what you were going to ask. “It’s been the only way to keep you quiet on planes since you were a baby.”

“Snacks are the key to my heart,” you smiled, picking up your light jacket and shoes before heading for the door. “Tell that to any possible suitor you see in Canada.”

“You’re not allowed to date until you’re twenty-one!” she called out after you, making you laugh as you made your way downstairs.

She sighed as she zipped your case and locked it, content that she had packed everything you needed. It was going to be a long week.

Trips to Vancouver had been a regular part of your life after your mom had married Jensen. You had always loved it when you were able to be on set, meeting Jensen’s colleagues and being behind the scenes. Growing up, you’d been on set with your mom during her movies but never for TV shows, so it all felt like a new experience.

You had just turned sixteen when Jensen came home for Christmas with an offer.

Your mom was pregnant with his first child and, to be honest, you had been feeling a little put out by the whole situation. You were happy for them - you really were - but you’d grown to see Jensen as a father figure and now he was going to have a real child. A blood-related child.

Your mother had convinced you that nothing would change, but you still had your doubts. You were sixteen, it was in your nature to question and worry about everything.

When Jensen came home and sat you and your mother down in the front room, you knew something was happening.

“First thing’s first,” Jensen began, strangely formal considering you were sat in your own home, “Do you still enjoy theatre at school?”

You laughed, relieved that it was an easy answer.

“Yeah,” you confirmed, looking at your mom. “Acting is in my blood.”

She smiled at you, nodding for Jensen to continue.

“I’ve talked it through with your mom and she says it’s up to you,” he hedged, “But there’s a new character that Supernatural is casting for. She’s supposed to be a highschool senior but I think you could pass, and I told them-”

“Are you offering me a role?” you asked excitedly, and your mom laughed fondly as she nodded.

“You might have to run a few lines before it’s confirmed, but the crew all know and love you,” she explained.

“And they agree that you would fit the role,” Jensen added. “I take it you’re interested?”

“God, yeah,” you breathed, your grin wide. “Yeah. Oh, my God.”

Your mom smiled, getting up from her seat beside Jensen to perch on the arm of your chair.

“You can travel up with Jay in the new year,” she smiled, kissing the top of your head. “My baby girl, the working actress.”

You couldn’t quite believe what you were hearing.

“There’s another thing,” Jensen approached, looking at your mother. “Regarding being a working actress.”

“Yeah,” your mom agreed, stroking your hair behind your ear. “We were talking about what your professional name would be.”

“Elta Graul,” you answered, frowning softly. “I’ve said before, I’d go by Elta. Keep Y/N for friends and family.”

“No, I know,” she nodded, meeting Jensen’s eye and urging him to continue for her.

“We were thinking,” he explained, “I mean- if you want- we thought-”

You laughed nervously as he stammered over himself, completely unsure what he was going to say.

“Elta Ackles,” your mom blurted, and you looked up at her with a soft frown.

“We were wondering if you wanted to go by Ackles,” Jensen expanded. “Professionally and- and officially. If, if you wanted.”

You swallowed, looking between the two of them with no words in your throat.

“What-?” you cleared your throat. “What are you saying?”

“Baby girl,” your mom sighed, a kind smile on her lips. “It’s been me and you forever. The Graul girls against the world, and I wouldn’t have had it any other way.”

“Me neither,” you murmured, taking her hand and squeezing.

“But now…” she looked across at Jensen, and you followed her gaze to find him watching you nervously. “I’m an Ackles. Your little brother or sister will be an Ackles. Your… your father is an Ackles. We wanted to ask if… How would you feel about Jensen becoming your father, officially?”

“I’d love to adopt you,” Jensen added. “I would be honoured.”

Your throat was tight as you felt the tell-tale fizzle behind your nose that let you know you were about to cry.

“You don’t have to,” your mom murmured, and you shook your head.

“That’s okay,” Jensen assured you, trying to disguise the hurt on his face.

“No,” you blurted, wiping your tears as they fell. “No, I mean. Yes. Please.”

Jensen’s downturned lips changed to a grin but his eyes remained in question.

“Are you sure?” he asked, and you nodded, getting to your feet and rushing over to where he was sat, throwing yourself into his arms.

“Thank you,” you whispered as his arms wrapped around you. “For everything.”

“It’s my pleasure,” he replied, kissing your temple. “You’re so welcome, my girl.”

[tchaikovsky-at-midnight]

part II: livin’ out your dreams

welcome back to my modern!au & coffe shop!au /barlyle/

as always unbeta’ed, I’m not a native speaker

enjoy it and if you have ideas/wishes/ for how to continue/critique/compliments - please tell me!

title from “Livin’ Out Your Dreams” by Jimmy Cicero

_____________________________________________________

part I

It was not a great week.

Philip caught a cold two days ago. Today it is Friday and he should stay in bed. Of course, he doesn’t. First of all, he needs the money, the coffee shop provides. Secondly, he is not a fan of lying around and being unable to do anything. After his first two sneezes he got practically banned from theatre. Now he is on his way to the coffee shop. He persuaded Charles to let him work, as he felt so much better than before. He really didn’t.

Once in the shop, he feels relieved. The cosy room makes him feel at ease. He is greeted by Lettie, who twists her entire face in one of concern and disappointment.

“Why aren’t you wrapped up in a blanket, with a ginger tea and some nice tv show on?”

“Because I need to be occupied. My mind drives me crazy when I’m sentenced to ‘rest’.”

“Well, stay away from me with your germs.”, Lettie banters.

Philip snorts. And promptly has to pull out a tissue. Being sick is truly awful. He is relieved when Lettie goes to fix some armchairs into their right order. He does not need to be interrogated more. It is true; he can’t stand to not do anything. There might also be another reason to him coming back early. This has obviously nothing to do with a certain costumer.

He snatches his apron from the small wardrobe and puts another script beneath the counter. Before he was kicked out of the theatre until he was healthy again, he took a copy of the next contemporary play with him. Lettie and he share another short coffee break before his shift starts and talk about Letties last performance at a small club, which often offers unknown artists to take the stage.

Lettie shows him a video W.D. recorded for her. Her talent awes Philip every time and he promises her to come to her next performance. She tells him to ‘better do so’ and then she is out of the shop.

Philip takes a deep, content breath and turns the music a bit louder. He has a good feeling about today, he couldn’t have dealt with another useless day at home. It felt like staying at home made him even more sick and desperate. Not that he was desperate. For what would he be desperate?

The door opens. Ah, for this, Philip thinks. And immediately bites his tongue. These thoughts are not helpful.

He dares to look at the man that approaches with confident strides.

“Philip! I missed you the last two days.”, Phineas states. For a second Philip thinks he might lean over the counter again to greet him with another kiss to his hand.

“Yeah I got sick, so...”, Philip explains suddenly. He wants to hold Phineas’ gaze but these eyes make him all fluttery inside. He forces himself to dim down to a more polite than exited smile. No hand kisses, no over-exitement. He wouldn’t ‘get his hopes up’.

Phineas’ eyebrows shoot up, nearly to his hair line. Anne was possibly right about him being a ‘showman’, he is very expressive. Philip’s smile becomes shyer.

“That’s terrible, do you feel better then? If not, you shouldn’t be here.”

“Oh, it’s fine. But thank you.”, Philip says. He hasn’t expected such a strong reply from the man.

“Now that you mention it, you look a bit pale.”

“It’s nothing, really.”

“Well if you say so. Get well soon. And maybe get me a cappuccino too.”, Phineas grins.

Philip sighs exasperated and mockingly bows. It might be his sickness, but he feels more able to chat freely today. He hopes he isn’t impolite while doing so, but Phineas doesn’t seem to be someone who is restrained himself.

“Do you come here so frequently because you are a friend of routine, or are you just really fond of our cappuccino?”, he asks amused.

Phineas takes off his coat, but doesn’t move over to his usual window seat. Instead, he stays at the bar, pulls a stool closer to sit right in front of Philip. He props his elbows up on the counter and rests his face in his hands. This gives him somewhat dreamy vibes, Philip can’t really place. He imagines himself looking a bit like that when he gets nostalgic. Or generally happy.

“Neither. Or both, if you want. I came for the caffeine and stayed for the barista.”, he has the nerve to wink at Philip, like he did when they parted the first day.

“Corny. Cheesy. Absolutely unacceptable. Although I get that Anne is pretty amazing.”

Philip teases. He knows how to joke, after all. He always felt safer playing the funny, flirty guy. It wasn’t usual for him to be on the receiving end. Fair enough, a lot of times when pretty women talk to him he tends to be a little blind, mainly, because he doesn’t care. He adores his co-workers and the people at the theatre, but there is no one who gains his attention for long.

“Oh, I agree. Although I’m more of a guy for the other side.”

“That’s good. I mean. Uh. Whatever floats your boat.”, Philip doesn’t bother to stifle the groan at his absolute stupidity. Silently he puts the cappuccino on the counter. It is again decorated with an ornament, this time it shows a swan.

“To whatever floats my boat.”, Phineas quotes gleefully and toasts his mug to Philip.

“I am almost afraid to drink that, this thing is too precious.”

“No, please. Besides, I can only do the flower and this swan, so you can get them again.”

Philip shrugs and avoids looking at Phineas. The compliments are nice, but if he can’t think fast to water them down with a joke, he is a bit lost.

“Don’t sell yourself short, it takes attentiveness to do small, lovely gestures like that.”

“Thank you.”, Philip answers honestly.

Phineas finally takes a sip and nods satisfied. Right then two new costumers enter the shop. Philip shoots Phineas an apologetic look and shuffles over to his checkout. The two women place their order to take away and Philip takes onto them. After the women paid and left, Philip returns.

“The redhead was flirting with you, sweetheart.”

Philip sends him a questioning glance. Whether it refers to the pet name or the statement itself? Who knows, Philip doesn’t. Thinking about it, the name doesn’t annoy him too much.

“Nah, she wasn’t. Was she?”

“Definitely.”

“Huh, inconvenient for her.”

“Is that so?”

“Yup. But I wasn’t accidently harsh, was I?”, Philip asks. He doesn’t want to hurt anyone because he can be with his heads stuck in the clouds. He looks around the shop and decides, as he puts some cash into the register, he can take one of the blueberry muffins.

“No, you were delightfully nice and polite. Maybe that’s what she liked.”

“Maybe.”, Philip repeats carefully.

“Yes, that or she thought you are ravishing.”

Philip nearly dropped the muffin.

“Sorry, this might not be the right word for you. Do you like captivating better? Or, no. You are more classy that way, aren’t you? Your word is of course gorgeous.”

“Shut up.”, Philip mutters, but he feels an awkward smile on his face regardless.

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, forgive me.”

Contrary to his statement, Phineas looks greatly satisfied with what he’s done. Philip once again doesn’t know what to think. This man asks too much all at once from him and his poor, sick mind.

“Yeah, sure. But you know what, that’s okay. I can deal with gamblers.”

“I’m not a gambler. I am an honourable, self-employed gentleman.”, Phineas answers and salutes with an imaginary hat. Somehow it is not hard for Philip to picture this man with some imposing piece like a top-hat. It would match his look. Although Philip could see this fooling around could go on and on, Phineas’ answer makes him curious now.

“What do you do then? If I may ask.”

“Of course you may. I got the best antique store in the city.”, Phineas states prideful.

“That’s actually pretty cool.” And something that fits this strange man, Philip thinks. He imagines him in a crowded shop, filled from bottom to top with old, used, strange and unique things. There’s probably one unbelievable story after another hidden.

“It is. You should come over one day; I bet you’d find some interesting objects.”

“Without a doubt.”, Philip agrees. He tries not to think about meeting the man outside his safe place, which is the coffee shop and what would be different. Probably nothing. Or everything.

“Then that’s a deal. Here, take this.”, Phineas reaches into the breast pocket of his shirt and hands over a filigree worked business card. Philip thumbs over the writing, he can feel the stamped letters. It reads: ‘Barnums Antiques – Fortune always favours the Brave’ followed by an address and a calligraphic signature: P.T. Barnum.

“Okay. I’ll definitely stop by.”, oh you will? Philips speaking is apparently faster than his thinking. Regardless, he plans to go through with this. Even if it wasn’t for Phineas, an antique shop promises to be fascinating.

He takes a bite of his muffin just to be occupied. Phineas sips on his cappuccino, but his eyes linger on Philip, he can feel it. Then the shop doors open once again. Philip hastily swallows the crumbly bite down to greet a costumer. Turns out, it isn’t a costumer at all.

“Hello, mother. What are you doing here?”

Mrs Carlyle steps into the coffee shop. Her heavy perfume spreads over the coffee aromas. The long, whitening hair is neatly pulled into an up-do, closed up like her whole attitude.

“Philip. I wanted to contact you. As you don’t answer your phone, or your door, I saw no other possibility to reach you.”, she states clearly annoyed. It reminds Philip why he doesn’t answer her calls.

“Well, you found me. What do you want?”, Philip repeats himself.

He doesn’t want to talk to his mother. She has never been what he wanted her to be – supportive, loving, understanding. She hates his ‘potential’ going to waste. She hates that he quit college. But a mother isn’t angry, no, she lets him know that. A mother is disappointed.

Before she can answer him, he has to pull out another tissue. Right when he thought he might get a bit healthier, feeling positively entertained through his chat with Phineas, his sickness hits him.

“I want you to get your head out of the clouds and bring honour to the family.”

She states with a demanding tone, that leaves Philip stunned. Disbelieving, he shakes his head. Then a sound erupts, which he first thought came from himself. Turns out, it was a thoroughly ridiculed Phineas, who swings the tea spoon around exaggerated, that came with his drink.

“Which century do you think we are in, madam?”, he asks with a challenging smirk.

Mrs Carlyle does not find that amusing. She clicks her tongue derogatory and doesn’t spare the provocative man another glance.

“It’s fine, Phineas.”, Philip soothes. It’s the first time he uses the man’s name.

“Mom, please, we’ve been over this.”, he tries to argue, “I like my jobs and where it might take me. This job gives me safety and working at the theatre is fun. You know fun, right?”

Phineas chuckles at that and gets a sharp stare from both Carlyle’s. Mrs Carlyle clears her throat and presses her lips together. She steps closer to Philip, before she swiftly turns around. At the door she stops again and gives her son a stern look.

“Fine, but you don’t have to come home again. You could have been successful, make money and be a leader. Not spend your time with...these people.”, she leaves.

Philip sighs drawn out and leans against the bar. He doesn’t know why his mother pops up every now and then to remind him, what he could be – should be.

“You know, it’s not fine.”

He looks up to see Phineas already glancing back. His amused, defiant attitude has vanished. Another sigh leaves Philips lips and he shrugs. He places the half eaten muffin next to his stuff under the counter, he lost his appetite.

“It’s not worth the fight. I know she’s disappointed, I am not the striking manager, lawyer, or whatever is ‘appropriate’ for the family.”

“You come from some noble, old family then?”

“Kind of. My father is somewhat important in finances, but who cares? I don’t and for them, that’s the problem.”, Philip explains shortly.

“Yeah, yeah. Traditions and honour, I get it. Poor little black sheep you are.”, Phineas answers. He is back smiling, but Philip sees the sympathy.

“Rebel of the family, woohoo.”,  Philip agrees wryly.

Phineas laughs at that and lifts his nearly empty mug to toast to him.

“That’s good. You do like you do, Philip. If they are narrow-minded it’s their own loss.”

Philip likes that conclusion. He smiles and shrugs once again, this time a bit more at ease.

“Thanks. And I’m sorry she kinda insulted you.”, Philip excuses her inappropriate behaviour.

“Don’t worry. Happens to me more often than it doesn’t.”, Phineas reassures him.

Although this doesn’t reassure Philip at all. Questioning he looks at the older man. Sure, Philip saw he wasn’t your inconspicuous average guy you pass on the streets. And he might be pretty bold, but Philip can’t believe being different was still such an issue.

“Uh, sorry for that. You don’t look like someone who get’s pushed around.”

“Well, I’m not 15 anymore, I don’t get pushed around. But you know, people judge. They love to do so and why the hell not, as long as I can live peacefully.”

Philip smirks and tips his head to the side, plainly looking the man up and down. Checking out-no.

“You also don’t look like someone who fancies a ‘quiet, peaceful’ life.”

“Oh, I don’t? What do I look like in your opinion?”

Think fast. Philip bites his lip, unsure, whether to share his first thought. ‘Whatever’, he decides when he leans over the bar, closer to the man who gazes intensely at him with that infectious smile.

“Adventure. Fun. Like nothing is impossible.”

If it was even possible, Phineas’ smile got more shiny and appealing. Appealing? Rather: charming. Wait, what.

“Why thank you, Philip. And may I add, you look, like you could use some fun.”

“Excuse you?”, Philip grins.

“I think you heard me just fine. Drop by.”, he suggests and points at the business card still resting on the counter between them.

“Keep the change. And that attitude, it suits you, sweetheart.”, Phineas lays down another $10 note.

“You need to stop doing that.”, Philip smiles, but puts the money aside.

“Which of it?”, Phineas asks with a sly grin and grabs his coat and walking stick.

“Just get out.”, Philip laughs. Phineas complies with a wink and leaves the door backwards, keeping his eyes fixed on Philip.

When he is out of sight – after a last ridiculous waving through the window, which Philip reciprocates with a heartfelt laugh – Philip closes his eyes.

“Oh god.”, he states and shakes his head at himself. He starts to admit he might be totally falling for this dorky man. There goes his ‘not getting his hopes up’.